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Chapter Text

A red haired girl adjusted her camera before backing up— She had hastily cut bangs with medium length hair tied in a ponytail. The girl also wore a red short sleeved leotard with grey sweatpants with her face and arms littered with scratches and scars.— She waved with a grin.

“Hi! Zoey here, I’m here to explain why I would be great for the next Total Drama!” The red-head started

“For one, I have a lot of different talents to offer like-“ The camera cut off and opened with her balancing on her head board, “I can be agile and graceful!”

She reappeared on the screen in front of a shelf of awards for different sports events, “But also tough and scrappy!”

The screen cut back to her in front of her bed, “And with all the keen instincts of a wilderness survivor, I’m ready to win this season, no matter what my doctor says!” Zoey exclaimed before realising what she just said

“W-well not doctor! I mean psychiatrist!” She stuttered, “I-I- I mean!-“ Zoey couldn’t get a sentence through before getting frustrated

“ARGH!” She stomped her foot and punched the camera before wincing, “Agh! Sorry!” The red-head apologised sheepishly as the camera shut off

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A boy wearing a dark blue beanie waved to the camera — His right eye was partially obscured by his hair. He had on a jacket of a similar colour to his beanie over a light brown Indie band t-shirt with baggy jeans. — The teen sat in front of a table where a sewing machine and scrapped fabric was on.

“Hi! I’m Mike and well, I want to be on Total Drama because.. yeah, I want to meet other teens outside my small town that watch Indie productions, like the same bands I do, and wear horn rim glasses-“ He listed off before shouting and cheering could be heard from his open window

Mike winced before sneering at the crowd in the streets, “Ugh..” He squinted, “Every Saturday night the town jocks drive up and down main street cheering for the football team” The indie boy explained in exasperation 

“Seriously, If I get on the show, my worst nightmare would be to get voted off by a jock” He chuckled to himself, “But what are the chances of that” Mike shrugged as the camera cut off.

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Chapter Text

The screen opened up to an astronaut attempting to fix a satellite with the names of the former seasons crossed out on it and ‘TDRI’ being drawing in big black letters beneath them.

“We’ve been to the movies!” Announced Chris, “We’ve been around the world!” He added as the satellite broke down, “And this season, we’re going right back where it all began!”

“At Camp Wawanakwa!” He introduced as the camera panned to the broken down island, “I’n Chris McLean, and as you can see, things have changed since we’ve been away.” The host pointed to the Wawanakwa sign breaking down right next to him as an intern held a tray with a coconut drink beside him.

“And by change, I mean gotten really, really, REALLY, dangerous!” Chris grinned before stepping aside as a giant octopus tentacle emerged from the lake and dragged the intern into the water making Chris cackle, “Good stuff!”

“But the rules of the game remain the same: a handful of unsuspecting teens will bunk with complete strangers, air their dirty laundry in our outhouse confessional, and compete in LIFE THREATENING challenges all over the island and risk being voted off!” He explained.

“Last one standing wins ONE MILLION DOLLARS!” The host announced, “Speaking of our cast, here they come now!” He gestured to a yacht holding the familiar teens.

On one side was DJ, Harold, and LeShawna dancing while a stoic Eva glared ahead whereas Courtney and Gwen were in a deep conversation much to Duncans annoyance.

Owen danced at the end of the boat while Noah gave a deadpanned expression to Izzy hanging off the edge of the ship near a giddy Alejandro who Heather gave a slight smile to.

Above them were Tyler and Lindsay making out while Beth squealed over Justins physique before a bird laid its business down on his shoulder.

And on the front of the ship were Katie and Sadie giving Trent a tight hug much to him and Ezekiels confusion as Geoff and Bridgette whooped and Cheered while Sierra held Cody bridal style at the tip of the plane much to his confusion.

Chris waved to them right before the ship went right past him, “NOOOOO!!” Owen cried making the host chuckle. 

“No!” He drawled out, “Not them, this season we’ve got all NEW players fighting for the million, and here they come now, for real!” The host pointed to a smaller yacht arriving to the island.

“Meet Jo!” 

The blonde girl crossed her arms and glared to the boy beside her, “Stay out of my way if you value your kiwis!” She warned.

“Scott!”

“Right back at’cha!” The ginger furrowed his brows before sniffing his pits.?

“Mike and Zoey!” 

Zoey looked like she was scoping out the first two and to the others on board before Mike gave her a small nudge.

“Can you believe we’re here?!” He exclaimed with a grin

“Y-yeah, it’s beautiful..” She replied as her shoulders dropped while she smiled back.

“Lightning!”

A muscular boy shoved the two out of the way as he flexed his arms to the camera, “Hello gorgeous!” Lightning grinned as he kissed his biceps.

“Brick!”

The boy dropped Mike to salute, “Brick McArthur reporting for duty!” He remarked.

“B and Dawn!”

The boy gave the camera a finger gun before Dawn paused her meditation to put her hand on the latter.

“Your aura is exceptionally purple-ish green” She smiled, “It suites you though!” She added.

“Dakota!”

“Hey there, Dakota here!” The blonde decked out in all pink waved before giggling, “And i’m here-“

“Anne Maria!”

“Oh yeah!” The tanned girl with a heavy New Jersey accent smirked as she blasted her hair spray, “Three more coats oughta do it!” She said  before being shoved away by Dakota.

“Woah! Who said you could pan away?!” The blonde exclaimed before being sprayed by Anne Maria.

“Don’t push ME blondie!” The girl yelled as she continued to spray her down.

“Staci!”

“My great aunt Millie invented suntans, yah, before her people smeared themselves with clay!” She stated before an agitated Anne Maria sprayed her down too.

“Cameron!”

The small boy inhaled, “Fresh air!” He exclaimed, “A real lake?! Birds!!” Cameron pointed before the flock flew past him making the boy drop to the first level of the boat.

“And Sam!”

“Aw yeah!” The red head exclaimed as he tapped his console, “Grenade launcher upgrade, now we’re cooking!” He grinned.

“Yep, it’s our roughest, toughest, most explosive season ever!” Chris shouted as he pressed a button causing the boat to combust.

“AHHHHHH!!” They all yelped.

“Right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He announced.
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“AHHHH!!” Cameron yelped before crashing onto a boulder stomach first, “Is this what pain tastes like?..” He groaned before sliding into the water.

“Chris is SO gettin’ a beat down for this!” Anne Maria sneered as she paddled to shore.

“Out of the way!” Shouted Jo as she shoved Staci and Mike away from her, “Prime athlete coming through!” She grinned before using Sam as a platform to jump from much to his chagrin.

“Spaz.” Scott rolled his eyes at Cameron who was drowning.

“I’ll save ya’ little girl!” Lightning emerged from the water as he swam to shore with the shorter boy in tow.

“I’m a boy!” Cameron squeaked in retaliation.

Meanwhile, Dakota waved to a paparazzi who took pictures of her in a lifeboat she somehow got, “Hi fellas! However did you find me?” She asked graciously.

“Uh, we got your text?” Responded one of them.

“For crying out loud?!” Chris exclaimed as he overviewed what was going on through a TV monitor, “Uninvited guest, over.” He spoke to his mic as Chef emerged from the lake behind the paparazzi’s ship.

The cohost planted a bomb on the engine before Chris pressed his button exploding the ship which made Dakota fly away.

“AUGH!” She yelped as she landed in Lightnings hands where Cameron once was causing the boy to hit Anne Marias rock hard hair.

“EY! No touchin’ the hair four eyes!” She shouted before spraying her hair once again.

“I wish my third uncle twice removed was here!” Staci exclaimed as she struggled to stay afloat, “He invented life preservers!” She added before sinking to the bottom.

“Hold on i’m coming!” Both Mike and Zoey swam to the girl.

“Oh- uhh, you- you can do it if you want!” The red haired girl rubbed her arm sheepishly.

“No please, go ahead, I insist!” Mike replied as Staci continued drowning.

“Well I mean if you-“ Zoey got cut off as Staci grabbed her head and took the girl down with her.

“Ah shoot!” Mike cried before diving down to get the two girls.

Zoey spit out the water before smiling to the Indie boy, “Heh thanks, I owe you one” She smiled.

**Confessional**

Zoey looked around the outhouse before looking at the camera, “Ok, my first confessional, soo, Mike huh?” She cupped her face looking off, “Nice guy, wonder if he’d go out with a girl like me..” She trailed off.

“See I have this small condition.. I just really hope it doesn’t ruin anything..”

“Again..”

**Confessional**

“Wow!” Mike cheered as he traced the carvings from the former contestants, “I can’t believe I’m in the Total Drama confessional right now!” He said excitedly.

“Almost everyone I’ve met so far seems so nice, I just hope they all like me.” He remarked, “I could use a few new friends, or friends period..” Mike frowned before looking to the camera nervously.

“But what if they hate me?!” He said worryingly, “Maybe the beanie was too much?! Am I trying too hard?! You like me right??” The Indie boy asked to the camera.

**End Confessional**

Jo gasped for air as she grinned at the shore, “Woo hoo! That’s what I’m talking about! First one on the-“ She stopped mid-sentence in exasperation looking to Dawn meditating on the shore, “How- you’re not even wet?!” She cried out.

“Hm? Oh, I used a shortcut!” The pale girl responded shrugging.

Brick arrived next as he crawled out the water and gave the two a small salute, “Ma’am!” He said before face planting on the sand.

**Confessional**

“I may be the strongest player here but I’m all about the teamwork!” Brick remarked, “Back in cadets I took the teamwork medal three years running!” He said proudly.

“Also the bed making medal, the flag folding medal, and the letters home to mom medal, I always win that one!” The cadet smiled.

**End Confessional**

Cameron arrived on B’s head as he coughed out water in pain.

**Confessional**

“I’m what’s known as a ‘bubble boy’” Cameron remarked as he rubbed sanitiser on his hands, “Growing up, my mom was really overprotective so I’ve never gone swimming before!” He added.

“Up until six hours ago, I’ve never done anything before, except read and sigh a lot” He said before sighing, “But that doesn’t mean I’m not a force to be reckoned with!” Cameron proudly said.

“No way!” He exclaimed as a butterfly flew above him, “Danaus Plexippus?! The monarch butterfly?!” The short boy pointing before the critter landed on his head making him bend over from the weight.

“Agh! It’s s-so heavy!” Cameron yelped before falling over.

**End Confessional**

“-Yeah, and my great great great uncle Borris invented swimming, before him people just swung their arms around like this and sank to the bottom!” Staci swung her arms around for reference, “And my great great great great great-“

“Yeah that’s great.” Mike cut her off as he gave a dopey smile to Zoey before Sam washed up on shore.

**Confessional**

Sam chuckled, “I knew I should have played that sweet fitness workout game!” He put his controller away as GAME OVER flashed on his screen, “I just hope I don’t get cut first, that would be lame.” He shrugged.

“BUT if I stick it out long enough to get cut six or even seventh, how cool would that be huh?” He paused before going back to his game.

**End Confessional**

“-Yeah, I’m really excited to be here, I’ve been a fan of Total Drama since forever!” Mike said excitedly, “Who knows, maybe I’ll even make some new friends?” He looked to Zoey hopefully.

“Mhm! That would be good considering you’ve been homeschooled while being an only child your entire life and all.” Dawn quipped in causing Mike to look concerned.

“Wha- who told you that?!” He asked worryingly.

“Your soul reads like an open book, you had such a lonely childhood.. it must have been difficult” Dawn responded apologetically causing Mike to look even more concerned before the speakers around the trees blared.

“Attention fresh meat, see the trail leading into the forest? Race to the end of the trail and do NOT disturb the wild life, that would be bad” Chris warned.

“Yeah, we wouldn’t want to upset the bunnies!” Lightning snarked as he jokingly elbowed Sam.

“The tiniest sound can scare them off, like THIS!” Chris aimed a blow horn to the speakers causing it to be heard across the island. This set off beasts in the forest who knocked down every giant tree in their path which scared off the contestants.

Jo made it before Lightning causing her to grin triumphantly, “Yes! Sorry you had to lose to a girl” She remarked to Lightning.

“What girl? Lightning didn’t lose bro, Lightning never loses!” He responded confidentially as Chris drove up to the two.

“Captain modesty, two steps left, you’re on team A, yo Jo, move right, you’re team B” The host explained

Scott arrived next followed by Brick, “Pit sniffer, you’re team A, corporal Brick house, team B” Chris pointed.

“Sir, yes sir!” Brick saluted before being accidentally shoved away by B.

“Silent treatment, team A” He waved before B turned around to show Cameron hanging on the silent boys hoodie, “Bubble boy, team B”

“Okie dokie!” The short boy ran to his team.

Zoey and Mike arrived next, “Mike the unliked, team B” Chris pointed.

“O-only as a child!” The indie boy said weakly as the host nodded his head disbelievingly, “Seriously!” He exclaimed as he walked off.

“The aura whisperer, team A!” Said the host.

Dawn looked to Zoey questioningly as the latter gasped not knowing where she came from

“Drowned first day, team B!” Chris remarked making Zoey glare at him.

Dakota and Anne Maria arrived next, “Princess wannabe, team A, and tan-in-a-can, team B!” He instructed.

And Sam and Staci arrived last, “Yo game junkie, team A!” Chris shouted.

“M-my uncle Bill won the New York marathon four times-“ Staci had to gasp for air, “Because marathons were first proposed by my great grea..” She dozed off and landed on the gamer boy.

“And chatty Staci, team A” Chris concluded.

“What the heck was that thing in the forest?!” Asked a panicked Scott.

“I’m pretty sure that cry does not belong to ANY known animal species!” Added Cameron.

“Relax, it will all make sense eventually..” Chris said in a nonchalant tone before laughing maniacally at the confused teens.

“Now!” He wiped off a happy tear, “This season of Total Drama will be a little bit different, for example, in every episode someone WILL be eliminated!” The host explained making the contestants gasp.

“But it’s never been that hard before?” Mike muttered.

“I know, I’m good” Chris smirked, “But since you’re all first timers, i’m gonna cut you a break and hide this bad boy somewhere in the campgrounds!” He announced holding up a statue of his head, 

“A genuine McLean brand Chris head! Your free ticket back into the game, even if your teammates vote you off, whoever finds it will become the MOST powerful player in Total Drama history!” He exclaimed before inspecting the statue, “Is the cleft on my chin really that big?” He asked.

“Yep, and it looks like a butt!” Scott said snidely.

“Moving on” Chris rolled his eyes, “Time for the team names!” He announced.

“Team Lightning!” The jock suggested, “No wait LIGHTNING SQUAD!” He shouted.

“Great suggestions Lightning but team names have already been chosen by moi!” The host waved off, “Team A, you will henceforth be known as.. THE TOXIC RATS!” He pointed to not much fanfare besides Sam.

“Heheh, killer!”

“And team B, you are hereby dubbed.. THE MUTANT MAGGOTS!” Chris grinned.

“Uhh, what’s with all the references to chemical waste?” Asked Zoey before the same loud roar erupted throughout the camp.

The contestants gasped in fear as it made its way closer and closer to them before jumping out of the bush to reveal..

A hairless squirrel?

“Hey, it’s just a stupid squirrel?!” Jo rolled her eyes.

Dakota cooed at it before the squirrel blinked sideways making her yelp.

“Oh my gosh, what’s wrong with it?” Dawn asked worryingly.

“While we were gone, I rented the island out to a nice family-oriented bio hazardous waste disposal company, sweet people, but the waste is having a teensy bit of an impact on the flora and fauna!” Chris explained.

“Cool!” Sam laughed.

“Weird..” Dakota remarked as she knelt down towards the creature, “I want one!” She said before the squirrel roared and somehow zapped laser beams towards her from its eyes.

“AHH!!” She yelped jumping into Sam’s arms accidentally.

“Most. Danger. EVER!” Chris grinned.

**Confessional**

Dakota wept sadly, “Chris is the meanest ever!” She exclaimed before pausing.

“Hang on-“ She pulled out her makeup compact and stared at her reflection, “-Not too blotchy.. ok, take two!” The blonde cleared her voice before letting out the alligator tears.

**End Confessional**

“Now, before we start our very first challenge of the season, let’s give out some rewards!” The host quipped.

“Jo, because you made it up here before anyone else, your team gets a trampoline, and the rats get a hacksaw!” He pointed to Chef who accidentally hit himself with the dull side of the saw.

“AUGH!” He cried making Lightning bend over laughing before the saw hit him in the head.

“AUGH!” The jock hissed in pain making Jo laugh right as the trampoline hit her.

“What do these items have to do with this bomb?” Asked Chris.

“Are you going to blow us up again!?” Zoey asked incredulously.

“Won’t I?” The host grinned, “Find out when we get back!”

Chapter Text

The screen opened to two totems bearing carvings of a rat and a maggot respectively being hung up on two trees.

“Those are your team totems, you need to cut them down and get them in the river and ride them back to the campground, first team there gets their pick of the cabins, but hurry! The totems are rigged with bombs that will explode of you don’t plant them in front of your cabins in seven minutes or less, starting NOW!” Chris explained to the contestants.

“Alright let’s do this!” Jo yelled on top of a boulder before flipping onto the trampoline only to get shot straight to the lake.

“Stand back, Lightning is on it!” The jock exclaimed proudly as he started climbing up the tree before slipping down, “Dang! Slippery tree, don’t worry, Lightning never quits!” He grinned before climbing up again.

B looked up at the tree quizzically as Staci started talking again, “It’s too bad my third cousin Jack isn’t here to give us tips on bare-handed tree climbing-“ 

“Ok, if Jo hits the center of the trampoline with fifty pounds of pressure per square inch-“ Cameron got cut off by Anne Maria shoving him away.

“Back off, I want a crack o’ this!” The New Jersey girl strutted past.

“Uh, maybe you should listen to-“ Zoey stopped herself as Anne Maria bounced onto the trampoline making her hit the platform of the totem.

Over

And over

And over.

Before Jo kicked the trampoline out of the way causing her to hit the ground.

**Confessional**

“Sure I wanna win a million dollars, but not at the expense of my looks!” Anne Maria crossed her arms, “I mean check me out, perfect hair, perfect tan, all this is worth a BILLION, easy!” She stated.

**End Confessional**

Meanwhile with the Toxic Rats, Lightning was still attempting to climb up the tree while Staci was talking about her ancestry as B walked past holding a plank.

“-And my great great great aunt Dora actually taught Native Canadians to carve totems-“ B dragged her away much to the others relief, “Huh?” She asked.

B placed her on the lower end of the plank while dragging Sam to the bottom of the tree.

“Woah, hey! You want me to stand here?” Asked the gamer geek before the silent boy front flipped at the opposite end of Staci’s side of the plank causing her to shoot up and land on Sam’s shoulders.

The others ooo’d and ahh’d at B’s idea right before Lightning face planted on the ground.

**Confessional**

“First of all, tree climbing is NOT a recognised sport!” The jock stated defensively, “Plus, that tree was covered in butter or somethin’ but if Chris is tryna make Lightning look bad, he can think again!” He exclaimed.

“Lightning never gives up and never surrenders, Sha-Lightning!” He fist pumped.

**End Confessional**

“Alright, time to win this!” Brick yelled as he jumped on the trampoline and grabbed onto the ax dented into the totem.

The others cheered before realising the cadet couldn’t get down.

“AH! AH! HELP!!” He yelped as Zoey groaned.

“C’mon man!” She yelled as Anne Maria and Jo shared her disappointment.

She looked to the other team in frustration realising they already had an idea set.

“Zoey, are you ok?” Asked Mike looking at the girls strong irritation right as her brows furrowed.

“God darn it!” Yelled the red haired lady clutching on her back, “Just cut the dang rope already!” She shouted much to the Indie boys confusion.

“That’s what we’re tryna do, Zoey!” Anne Maria rebutted.

“Who ya talkin’ to missy?! Names Beatrice!” The old lady bit back. 

“Excuse me?” Questioned Mike.

**Confessional**

“Ok, Zoey is really, really great!” Mike started, “I don’t know why she’s doing this cranky old woman comedy bit but maybe it’s funny in France or something?” He theorised 

**End Confessional**

The Toxic Rats were getting close as B flung Lightning on top of Scott making the jock whoop and cheer.

“Lightning strikes!” He grinned.

Meanwhile, Brick was still trying to get the axe out as the same squirrel crawled out of its hollow hole making the cadet gasp.

“Hey, go away! Shoo!” He tried which made the squirrel blink and roar.

“AHHH!!” He squealed.

Below him, Beatrice was already getting sick of this as she tossed a rock up and down, “Back in my day, we didn’t need fancy saws and axes to cut ropes, we did just fine with stone!” She sneered throwing the rock upwards hitting the squirrel.

The animal quite literally saw red as it started zapping the woman.

“GRAHH!!” She yelped running away.

B flung Dawn next making the girl slowly land on Lightnings shoulder as the jock looked around incredulously wondering where the sparkle noise came from.

“One more person will do it!” Sam realised, “Dakota?” He asked as B looked around for the blonde.

Said blonde somehow got the paparazzi to the island as she posed for the cameras on an open tree stump.

“AH!” She gasped as a tree landed on the photographers.

“Timber!” Yelled Chris holding a chainsaw, “No time for photo ops Dakota!” He instructed.

“Take it easy!” She shouted back.

“AHHHH!!” Yelled the Mutant Maggots as the squirrel wreaked havoc on the teens before it looked towards Brick and started zapping him.

“GAH NO! NOT THE CREW CUT!” He yelped before the laser shot by the creature bounced off the branch and hit the rope causing it to sizzle.

“AGH!” Brick shouted as he and the totem dropped down on the ground. The team stopped running before they started cheering at their lowered totem.

“Mission accomplished!” The cadet saluted before the totem dropped on him.

“AHH! Put me down, take it easy!” Dakota yelled to B as Dawn gasped from the top of the human tower.

“Only three minutes left!” The aura whisperer exclaimed as Dakota got flung onto her shoulders.

“Quick, saw the rope!” The pale blonde girl gave the saw to Dakota.

The pink clad girl sawed the rope with the dull side and looked puzzled, “How are you supposed to- it won’t work!” She yelled.

“Teeth down on the rope, DOWN!” Sam shouted.

“No girl, you CANNOT be that dumb!” Lightning added hypocritically.

“Pretend it’s daddy’s steak knife!” Quipped Dawn as Dakota realised what she was supposed to do and flipped the saw teeth down.

“There!” She grinned as she successfully sawed the rope.

“B! Change your name to A plus!” Sam complimented.

**Confessional**

The silent teen gave the camera a smug grin as he blew hot air onto his fist and rubbed his jacket.

**Confessional**

“B thinks he’s so smart, but once my plan goes into action he won’t know what HIT him!” Scott cackled before he threw his rock which bounced back on his face, “OW!” He hissed.

**End Confessional**

The Mutant Maggots laughed as they sailed down before being followed by the Toxic Rats.

“They’re gaining on us!” Shouted Jo as Brick looked ahead agape.

“It’s my duty to inform you ma’am, we have bigger problems.” The cadet pointed ahead.

The team all gasped besides Cameron, “My first waterfall!” He cheered.

“And maybe your last kid!” Beatrice yelled as the team flew down the waterfall.

The totem crashed on the hill causing Mike to lose grip of the totem, he grasped onto the end of the statue last second with a panicked expression as the old woman paid no mind to what was going on behind her.

“Argh, kids these days and their stupid waterfalls!” She rolled her eyes.

“ZOEY!” Shouted the indie boy making Beatrice pause before Zoey straightened her posture and looked back at Mike.

“MIKE HOLD ON!” She yelled as she grabbed the boy right before he could fall off.

Mike hugged her tightly and smiled, “Thanks Zoey.” He said thankfully making the red head blush.

“No problem, heh..” She looked away bashfully as the Toxic Rats landed on the hill.

B gestured forward as Dawn translated, “B wants us to lean forward!” She instructed.

“Yah! My great great great second aunt Mary invented log riding and she-“

“WE DON’T CARE!”

“Hey! How did they get in front of us?!” Jo cried.

Meanwhile in front of the cabins, Chris and Chef sat on their lawn chairs peacefully waiting for the contestants.

“Ahh” The host sighed peacefully, “Feels good to be back!” He said before heaving and huffing was heard behind him.

“Hey Chris!” Owen yelled, “Get this, the boat wouldn’t stop!” He said obliviously.

“Oh look!” Chris pointed, “It’s former player Owen, who’s NOT competing this year!”

“Yeah!” The blonde laughed, “So I swam back to tell you that- WHAT?!” He realised, “NOT COMPETING!?!” The lovable oaf cried.

“I’m afraid you and the other ‘classic’ players have outlived your usefulness, Chef?” The host asked pointedly as the military veteran planted a bomb on Owens chin.

“AHHH!!” He shouted before Chris clicked the button causing the blonde to fly away as the hosts laughed.

“WOOOOO!!” Yelled the Toxic Rats as they arrived first.

“Go team Lightning!” Cheered the jock.

“Tick tock!” Chris pointed to his watch.

“Quick, grab the good cabin!” Instructed Scott as the team picked up the totem and put it on the tree stump making them cheer.

Right before the Mutant Maggots all yelled as they flung off their totem that landed right on the good cabins balcony before the bomb exploded.

The Toxic Rats looked agape at their blown up cabin as Chris shook his head sadly, “Shame, it had an eight-person hot tub and AIR CONDITIONING.” He shrugged as the team groaned in dismay.

“Yah, my great great great uncle James invented log cabins-“ Staci didn’t notice the others glaring at her harshly, “-Before him, people had to sleep in the trees and they kept falling out all the time, and my great great great great great aunt Phyllis invented roofs and before her, houses were just walls and furniture and every time it rained people had to get a new sofa!” She laughed.

The hosts looked at the chatter box knowingly, “Regardless, as the only team with a cabin still standing, the Mutant Maggots win the first challenge!” He announced.

“Yayy..” They cheered despondently.

“So where am I gonna sleep?” Asked Lightning.

“No worries, we got a backup cabin, it’s every bit as nice as the one you lost!” Chris waved off as a helicopter flew it in.

“Crap!” The jock exclaimed, this could also describe their new cabin.

“Team rat, I’ll see you at the campfire for the first elimination of the season!” The host laughed.

The Toxic Rats all slumped into their seats and Chris looked at them with a tray of marshmallows, “The votes are cast, those who receive a regular marshmallow can stay, but this season one player will receive a special marshmallow, a marshmallow you do NOT want to eat!” He gestured to Chef in a hazmat suit.

The cohost opened up a metal box to reveal a neon green marshmallow.

“Whoever gets the marshmallow of toxic loserdom is out of the contest, which means you can’t come back EVER!” He lied, “The following players are safe.”

“Scott.”

“B.”

“Lightning.”

“Dawn.”

“And Sam.”

Dakota and Staci looked at each other nervously.

“And the marshmallow of toxic loserdom goes to…”

“Staci!” Chris announced.

Chef threw the toxic marshmallow at the girl who gasped.

“But I was doing so good!” She sighed right before her hair sizzled off.

The others yelped and got as far away from her as possible.

“I guess it’s the dock of shame for me then..” The chatter box stood up.

“ACTUALLY, we came up with something new this season!” The host gave a maniacal grin, “You’ll LOVE it!” 

The camera cut to Staci sitting on a massive catapult.

“Say hello to the hurl of shame!” Introduced Chris, “Patent pending.” He added.

“Yah, catapults were invented by my great great great great great great great great grEA-“ Staci got cut off as Chris flung her away.

“One down, twelve to go, who’s next in line? Find out next time, right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Shouted Chris.

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of The Island, thirteen new competitors were BLOWN away by this year’s challenges!” The screen shows the boat holding the new contestants being blown to bits.

“They were treated to an early morning swim,” Scott swam past a struggling Cameron, “-Said hello to the islands wild life,” Dakota jumped away as the squirrel shot the ground with electricity, “-And did some totem surfing!” The Mutant Maggots flew off their totem causing it to land on the nice cabin and blow it up.

“Explosive!”

“In the end, Staci’s team got SO sick of her non-stop tall tales that they sent her packing, hurl of shame style!” Chris flung a bald Staci off the island.

“Who’ll go home next? And how much pain can I put them through first? Find out right now on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Shouted the host.
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The sun shone over the two cabins as a blue bird perched onto a bed frame and chirped to the local aura whisperer.

“Really?” Asked Dawn who was hanging upside down from her bed, “Oh no!” She gasped much to her teammates annoyance.

“Can you keep it down?!” Dakota yelled as she tried muffling the noise by covering her ears, “If I don’t get my beauty sleep, I’ll lose it!” She groaned.

“Yes, because your need for fame is really a depressed cry for love.” The moon child replied.

“Who told you that, my therapist?!” Dakota sat up on her bed and whipped her head around to Dawn.

“I can read peoples auras, and it looks like someone threw up on yours..” She responded making the fame monger huff.

“Oh go eat a worm!” Dakota grabbed her pillow and shut her ears with it.

The bird looked to Dawn and coughed out a worm for her, “Ahh.. no thanks.” The girl chuckled.

Meanwhile in the males side of the Toxic Rats cabin, all the boys were sleeping peacefully before the door flung open.

Sam looked to a petrified Scott and raised an eyebrow, “Hey man, what’s with all the dirt?” He asked.

The country boy blinked and thought of an excuse for a moment, “Oh uh- I just had an early makeout sesh with one of the honeys” He lied through his teeth.

“Sha-doozy!” Lightning jumped out his bed and skidded towards Scott, “Which one?” He asked.

“Uhm..”

“AHHHHHHH!!” Scott shrieked as a bear sized beaver chased him down.

“A man doesn’t kiss and tell” He crossed his arms proudly and grinned.

“You kissed a gentleman?” Sam - coming out of nowhere- asked making the other ginger boy scowl.

**Confessional**

“Alright.” Scott shrugged, “I was out lookin’ for that hidden immunity idol, not that they need to know, it’s all apart of my strategy.” He started.”

“Let my team lose so the maggots develop a false sense of security before I pick em’ off!” He explained before someone knocked on the walls, “Occupied!” The ginger rolled his eyes before the same beaver creature broke the wall and growled at him loudly.

“AHHH!!” He shrieked again.

**End Confessional**

Inside the Mutant Maggots cabin, Anne Maria blew her hair with a hairdryer in one hand and brushed her hair before shutting off the hairdryer and looked to ‘Zoey’ in annoyance.

The woman in question was snoring and talking in her sleep, “Argh.. ungrateful brats ain’t havin’ to work like back in the day!”

“Ughh.. Beatrice keep it down..” Zoey grumbled as she pulled the blanket closer.

“Fine!” Beatrice huffed falling silent.

Turns out, this conversation could be heard by Cameron, who’s side of the wall was right next to Zoey’s, he peeked out his sleeping bag and stared at the wall quizzically though Mike seemed to be a heavy sleeper.

**Confessional**

“I had a hard time falling asleep.” Cameron stated as he poured sanitiser on his hand, “It was my first night outside my bubble but finally, I recreated it with my sleeping bag and I was out like that!” He snapped his fingers, “What an adventure!” The bubble boy said excitedly.

**End Confessional**

Outside, Brick dashed through the forest heaving and huffing at a repeating pace.

**Confessional**

“As the only soldier here with any military training, I definitely got a winning edge!” Brick remarked.

“My biggest competition is probably Jo, good thing we’re on the same team!” He shrugged, “Like my drill sergeant always says, keep your enemies close and your rivals closer!” The cadet exclaimed.

“W-wait, I did that wrong.” He stuttered, “Keep your family closer and enemies at arms length!” Brick tried, “N-no uhh h-hold on..” The boy scratched his head in confusion.

**End Confessional**

Brick continued running not knowing that Jo was running closer and closer to him.

A squirrel looked at the two before they collided.

“OW!” They yelped before Jo glared at the cadet.

“Just did my morning 5k run, you?” She asked.

“8k!” Brick grinned.

“I mean I did an 8k warm up then 5k at a full sprint!” Jo rebutted.

“My entire run was uphill!” He challenged.

“Yeah, uphill with my eyes SHUT!” She argued back.

“I ran backwards with earplugs!” Brick bragged.

“Why earplugs?” Jo asked.

“I dunno!” The boy shrugged.

Jo rolled her eyes at this and smirked, “Y’know, team maggot is lucky to have us, WE won the challenge yesterday-“ She put her hand on his chest, “-WE’LL carry them all the way to victory!” The girl grinned.

**Confessional**

“I’LL carry them to victory, just being nice so that aptly named clump of cadet meat will be loyal but when the time comes..” Jo snapped her stick in half and winced, “OW! Splinter!” She hissed before muttering curses.

**End Confessional**

The speakers around the island blared as Chris began talking, “Up and at it my little morning glory’s, it’s time for today’s challenge!” He announced to the two teams.

“What?!” Cried the jock, “But Lightning hasn’t had his DPA!” He shouted.

The others looked at him questioningly.

“Huh?” Asked Sam.

“Daily protein alignment? Duh!” Lightning rolled his eyes.

“And I haven’t had enough beauty sleep!” Dakota quipped, she had on her sunglasses covering her eyes.

“C’mon, you look-“ Dakota took off her glasses, “-GREAT SUNS OF ORION!” He yelped looking at the girls bloodshot eyes.

“You can catch up on sleep AFTER the challenge, right this way to the bay of dismay!” Chris gestured making the contestants groan.

The fame monger contacted her paparazzi, “Hey it’s me! We’re going to some bay-“ A fishing rod with a magnet attached took the girls phone away, “HEY!” She shouted.

“Contraband!” Shouted Chris as he picked up Sam’s console as well, “Now it’s mine, confiscated keepers!” The two looked in dismay, “C’mon, humiliation awaits!” He laughed.

Mike looked weary as he and the other contestants walked to their destination, “Bay of Dismay?” He asked, “Sounds like one of those fight locations in Total Warriors Two!” He exclaimed which made Zoey gasp in recognition.

“You like action movies?!” She asked excitedly, “Dude! If you’re into ultimate kickboxing, I may have to marry you!” The girl laughed causing Mike turned as red as her hair.

Dakota looked to the camera who panned over to her and Sam who caught up to her, “Hey Dakota!” He struggled keeping up, “Sorry about before.. I was just so taken about your beautiful- nostrils!” He winced at his words.

**Confessional**

“Nostrils?! NOSTRILS?!” He slapped himself on the head.

**End Confessional**

“Thanks?” Dakota replied, “I like your.. uhh..” She looked away, “Can I get back to you on that?” The blonde chuckled sheepishly as Sam sighed.

Cameron and Jo walked past him.

“I hope this isn’t another physical challenge, I prefer something a little more academic.” Cameron quipped.

“I bet you do toothpick, I’m surprised your scrawny neck could fit that big head of yours.” Jo responded aggressively.

“My greatest strengths are mental!” He argued weakly.

“Well you’re MENTAL if you think you could win Total Drama without getting physical, just stay out of my way.” She walked away leaving a saddened Cameron.

“So what do ya think the challenge is gonna be?” Anne Maria asked to B.

He shrugged and looked away.

“You don’t talk much do ya?” She furrowed her brows.

**Confessional**

B shrugs.

**End Confessional**

The camera pans to the two teams on opposite benches above water with Chris in the middle on his own podium wearing his blue tux.

“Welcome to the ‘Getting to know you’ trivia game challenge!” The host introduced, “Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?” He asked.

Scott grunted, “Too snug!” He complained, “It’s cutting into my shoulders!” The country boy winced.

“Yeah, children sized harnesses will do that!” Chris laughed maniacally, “I’ll be asked our players embarrassing personal questions and I mean MAJORLY humiliating, if they player i’m talking about hits the poorly wired buzzer and owns their humiliation before the time runs out, their team gets a point, first team to five wins part one and a distinct advantage in part two!” He started.

“BUT if no one owns up, this happens!” Chris clicked his button causing team maggots bench to sink into the ground.

“AGH!” Cameron tried shouting in the water as a mutant shark swam to them.

“AHHH!!” They all shouted before being taken up above water again.

“WHAT WAS THAT?!” Bricked yelled.

“THERE’S SOME KIND OF TWO-LEGGED SHARK MONSTER!” Zoey shouted.

“You mean Fang?” Asked Chris, “Yeah, it turns out toxic waste can mess with stuff underwater too!” He laughed, “Who knew?” He asked.

“Better them than us.” Scott whispered to Lightning.

“Anywho!” The host interjected, “If a team gets dunked, their opponents can steal by guessing which dunk-ie is guilty, guess right and you get a point, guess wrong and this happens!” He clicked the button again causing the rats to drop down.

“AHHH!!” They yelled looking at a hungry Fang.

Chris waited a few seconds as he revelled in the muffled yells of the contestants before letting them back up again.

“NOW! If everyone understands the rules, let’s start the game!” He starts.

“Toxic Rats, listen carefully, who did this on the one and only date they ever had?” The screen showed a character choking on a pasta noodle leading to them having to be taken to the ER..?

Everyone laughed as Sam blushed in embarrassment, “Where did you get that?!” He asked causing Dakota to suddenly stop laughing, he clicked the button getting him shocked, “OW!”

That was one point for the rats.

“Who wet their pants on the first AND last day of school?”

“Woah, one of us is a pants wetter?” Asked Mike causing Zoey to cackle in laughter.

Jo raised an eyebrow to an embarrassed Brick, “He who sweats it, wets it, team before pride maggot!” She crossed her arms.

Brick hesitantly clicked the buzzer, “Fine it was me!” He admitted causing the opposite team to laugh and point.

“And it’s one all!” Chris exclaimed as the teams cheered.

“Sorry for judging you Brick, owning up must’ve been tough” Mike whispered to the ashamed boy.

“Whose first name is really Beverly?”

“That’s no embarrassing question, who cares if one of those gals names is Beverly?” Anne Maria rolled her eyes.

Dawn and Dakota didn’t seem to care about the question as much as B did.

B pressed the button and looked down in shame.

“Correct, BEVERLY!” Chris smirked, “Team rats get a point BUT I would’ve preferred a verbal response?” He added.

“But B never talks, just look at his aura!” Dawn said defensively as B shrugged.

“Don’t care, so as a quick punishment!”

Team rat got sent down into the water.

“AGH!” Scott yelped as Fang chomped him whole while his team got sent up.

“NO!” He exclaimed opening the sharks jaws open and swimming up, “Wait for me!” He cried.

**Confessional**

“Argh..” Scott grabbed a triangular object out his shoe, “What the- a shark tooth?” He questioned.

**Confessional**

Fang looked at his missing tooth in the mirror before growling and snapping the object in half.

**End Confessionals**

Scott coughed out excess water and looked to his teammates angrily, “Thanks for helping me out there TEAM, you can win this stupid challenge without me!” He sassed.

“If he’s not playin’ then I’m not either!” Anne Maria stated as she tried removing her harnesses.

“Uhh.. since I’ve already been humiliated, can I go?” Asked Sam.

“Ok, everyone just settle down!” Chris warned.

“Y’know, I’m with Anne Maria!” Zoey exclaimed, “N-not because I have any secrets to hide heh..” She muttered.

“SIT DOWN TOMATO HEAD!” Shouted Jo slapping her back into her seat, “I’m not losing this game!” She glared.

“Hey! Take it easy!” Mike stood up.

“Hey! Host talking here!” Chris remarked, “I decide when the challenge is over!” He pointed.

“Whatever I’m out of here-“ Scott tried getting down but Lightning pushed him away.

“Not until we win!” He shouted.

“Hey it’s me!” Dakota whispered to her backup phone.

Meanwhile Fang chomped a piece of the maggots bench.

“AHH!!”

“Yeah, I’m using my backup phone!” The blonde smiled.

All the contestants started bickering with each other causing Chris to get more and more annoyed.

“ALRIGHT, SHUT IT!” He yelled, “Thanks to your pathetic digressions, now we don’t have time to finish this challenge, happy?!” Asked the host leading to cheering and clapping.

“Well you won’t be happy for long, come back after the break for an all new challenge, to which there is NO escape, but in the meantime!” He clicked the button causing both teams to be submerged.

“AHHHH!!”

Chapter Text

The camera opened to Mutant Maggots walking along the trail as Cameron smiled nervously.

“Thank goodness the game ended before Chris could ask me an embarrassing question!” He quipped.

Jo rolled her eyes, “Let me guess, who still needs their diaper changed?” She asked.

“I haven’t worn a diaper since I was eleven!” The bubble boy argued weakly causing Jo, Anne Maria, and Zoey to laugh.

“The challenge is over, you don’t have to keep humiliating yourself!” Whispered Brick.

“Hah, no please, go on, or does baby need his bottle?” The blonde mocked putting on a high pitched voice.

“I have just enough right to be here as you do, and I’ll prove it in the next challenge, you’ll see!” Cameron exclaimed confidently.

**Confessional**

Cameron rocked back and forth with his eyes blown wide, “Why did I say that?!” He said, “WHY?!”

**End Confessional**

Team Toxic Rats were walking on the path before Sam and Dakota stopped.

“This is the longest I’ve ever gone without playing a video game, my hands feel so empty!” He lamented to the blonde.

“Ugh, Chris is SUCH a jerk, I could’ve sent like, six hundred texts by now!” She pulled out her soaking wet phone.

“Wow! We have a lot in common!” Sam replied.

“Why would you say something like that to me?” Dakota replied, horrified.

“No! No! I meant about the tech withdrawal, trust me, you’re nothing like me otherwise!” The redhead said sheepishly.

Dakota looked confused before smiling, “Aw, thanks!” The two smiled at each other.

Scott glared at the sight before looking to Lightning, “Chris sure did a number on our team, he took away Sam and Dakota’s lucky gadgets right before the big game!” He put the situation into a sports context for the less than smart boy.

“Aw man! This stinks!” Lightning exclaimed.

**Confessional**

“Man, Chris should’ve let Lightning be a team of one, Lightning’s used to carrying his teams back home, but at least THOSE guys could actually play the game, unlike this bunch of losers!” The jock crossed his arms.

**End Confessional**

“Welcome players!” Chris’s voice boomed throughout the entire island, “Now that you’re all here, it’s time for part two of today’s challenge!” He announced.

“The mad skillz obstacle course!” He announced. “The relay race begins with a mad dash from the kickstart, forget coffee, if this baby doesn’t get you going, nothing will!”

“Then its off to the race against time that is the canon ball run, and over to my personal fav, wrecking ball alley, hurts so good!”

“And moving on, we head to the gangplank, complete with rabid mutant beavers, followed by the bouncing agony of double trouble!”

“And finally, the grand slam, where you’ll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats, piece of cake!” He grinned.

“Oh, and as you may remember, I said that the winning team from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two-“

“But there was no winner?!” Mike exclaimed.

“Yeah, don’t remind me” Chris rolled his eyes, “The losing team was gonna wear snazzy specks while competing but since we never actually finished the competition, I’ve decided that EVERYBODY has to wear them!” He cackled.

“Hey what’s with the grandpa glasses?” Jo asked putting on the green tinted glasses, “We won’t be able to see anything wearing these!” She complained.

“Dork-tacular goggles won’t make part two easy, or attractive but it can be done, in theory!” The host stated causing everyone to groan, “Competitors, take your positions!” He instructed.

“First up at the kickstart, it’s Lightning against Anne Maria”

“Then, it’s Dawn versus Brick, versus the canon balls!”

“Scott faces Jo in wrecking ball alley!” The formers glasses seemed to be pushed up more than the others.

“B is up against Mike at the gangplank!”

“Zoey and Sam will battle double trouble!”

“And Dakota will fight Cameron for the grand slam!”

“First team to finish wins the whole shebang and the other team loses a member tonight, since it’s a relay race, you’ll need something to pass!”

“Your mascots!” Chris revealed, “Ohh intern!” He called.

Lightning and Anne Maria looked at each other incredulously as the intern walked up to them with loud shaking cages.

“Team rat gets a mutant rat and team maggot gets a mutant maggot!” The host explained.

“Ew!” The New Jersey girl reeled back from the creature, “It’s a what?” She asked.

“And go!” Chris blew his air horn.

“AHHHHH!!” Shouted Lightning as the boot kicked him first.

“And Lightning gets the boot!” Chris announced as Lightning yelped from getting his hand bit by the rat.

“Anne Maria takes the early lead!” The girl jumped from platform to platform.

“Here!” She shoved the maggot away to Brick.

“Sir, yes sir!” He saluted before running.

“Yeah, I got it goin’ on!” She wiped her hands walking away confidently before falling into the mud.

Bricks lead was cut short as he kept hitting a pole over and over again while Lightning ran to Dawn.

“SHA-BAM!” He shoved the rat to her, “Go creepy girl, go!” The jock shouted.

Dawn ran past Brick, “The rats take the lead-“ She halted to a stop at the canons, “-Or not!”

“Anybody want to swap?!” The aura whisperer asked before the rat squeaked to her and pointed ahead, “Whats that? Duck now?” She asked right before the canon that the rat was pointing to fired.

The blonde ducked causing the canon to hit Brick right in the face.

“Du-ayy!” He said dizzily before knocking over.

Chris laughed from the TV he was looking through.

Dawn handed the rat to Scott before buckling over and gasping for air.

“Wow, we’re in the lead!” The farm boy realised, “Great..” He muttered before walking backwards slowly, “That’s it, nice and slow, all the way to las- OWWW!!” He yelped as the rat bit his chin right before the wrecking ball flung him away.

“OUGH!” The ginger groaned landing next to B.

“Faster soggy pants, go, go, go!” Jo ordered to Brick sliding towards her.

“Ya- wee!! Here’s your cat!” He handed the maggot to her before passing out.

“There, there little guy.” Scott brushed the rats head while B gestured to his hands for the rat.

“Oh! Do you want this?” He asked, “Why didn’t you say so BEVERLY?!” Scott snarked.

B looked at him furiously before snatching the rat and jumping on the platform. He wiped an invisible sweat off before shaking as two beavers bit at the support beams, when the silent boy got knocked down he tried thinking of how to get away from the beavers.

Meanwhile Jo hitched a ride on the wrecking ball and jumped to the next platform, “Awe yeah baby!” She cheered.

B quickly constructed a female beaver out of the mud causing the two beavers to get distracted from him.

“And in a surprisingly touching move, B extends the rats lead!” Chris documented.

“Aw c’mon!” Groaned Scott.

“Go! Go!” Jo shoved the maggot to Mike as he ran away.

He ran to the first platform unaware that B’s trick lost its effect as the mud beavers head fell off. The indie boy yelped as the beavers bit on the beams once again, “AHHH!!!”

“Yes! Go B, lay it on me!” Shouted Sam as the silent guy handed him the rat.

The gamer bounced up and down the bouncing platforms, “DAKOTA, TAKE IT!” He shouted but it was fallen on deaf ears as Dakota just looked at her mirror compact.

“Okay, ready!” She held her arms out before looking down to a face planted Sam as the rat scampered away from him.

“NOO!! COME BACK!” He yelled.

“Here Zoey!” Mike gave the maggot to the surprisingly confident girl, the twos hands touched for a second before she swiped the maggot away.

“Why thank you darling!” The red headed lady with a Russian accent smiled and she gracefully leaped away.

“Wha?!-“ Mike cried as the beavers dragged him back down.

The gymnast waved and blew kisses at the invisible audience before pirouetting to the bouncing platforms. “Only one person could do this, tis I, Viktoriya, the olympic queen of gymnastics!” She exclaimed proudly.

Viktoriya front-flipped two platforms at a time before landing at the end in splits as she raised the maggot above her head proudly, “TA-DA!” She handed the creature to Cameron.

“Wow, did Zoey just unveil a secret skill for us? Well whatever she did, its left the maggots in the lead!” Announced Chris.

Zoey winced in pain, “Ow, ow-“ She struggled getting up from doing the splits while Cameron looked confused.

“Viktoriya? Zoey, how did you do that?” The bubble boy asked incredulously.

“Do what?” She asked, “Wa- where are we right now?” The red-head asked back as Cameron just picked up the maggot with an eyebrow raised.

“Here!” Sam gave the rat to Dakota.

“Eww! Can you at least wipe it off?” She asked.

“Yes, yes!” Cameron yelled, “I’ve never felt so alive!” He shouted before stopping at the giant bats and baseball mitt.

“I’m a dead man.”

“LET ME GO!” Shouted Mike being held back by one beaver while the other was ready to eat him, “I SAID, LET. ME. GO!” He kicked the beaver where it hurt before doing the same to the one holding him.

The two beavers winced and dropped down.

Mike looked to the animals apologetically, “Agh! I’m sorry!” He said sheepishly, “But I did say to stop!” The indie boy chuckled before running to the platforms.

Dakota caught up to Cameron with the rat now being clean, “Well Dakota fans, here goes nothing!” She looked to the cameras and giggled.

The blonde swung forward and dodged all the bats while smiling directly to the camera. She nearly made it but her foot slipped on the last second causing her to lose her grip and fall down into the mud.

Dakota coughed out mud and looked at her tattered and muddy clothing and- well, everything and screamed at the top of her lungs, “AHHHH!!”

Cameron shoot his shot and swung forward but hit the first bat in his way.

The fame monger groaned as she went back to the start before being called over.

“Dakota, over here! Sorriso per noi! Smile for us beautiful heiress!” The paparazzi - This time on a parachute. - called over.

“Finally!” She sighed, “Hi!!” She waved, “You’re just in time for my uhh- mud bath!” The blonde posed dramatically as they took pictures of her.

“NO! IGNORE THEM AND SWING! SWING!” Shouted Sam as their teammates glared at her.

Meanwhile, Cameron made it back up and started calculating, “Velocity times mass times wind speed-“ The maggot chomped his hand, “WAHHH!!” He cried, tripping on a rope and being flung off as he hit the bats over and over again before landing abruptly on the mitt with the maggot on his legs.

“The maggots win!” Shouted Chris.

The mutant maggots all cheered.

“To the maggots, the spoils: McLean brand soap, shampoo, and conditioner to wash off the stink!” He advertised

“Stinkkk!” Brick said dopily getting a few concerned stares.

“And to the rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!” He winked as the team groaned.

“I can’t believe this, Lightning is on a team of losers!” The jock complained as he trudged away.

“Oh c’mon! Winning isn’t everything!” Sam shrugged

“RAHHHH!!” An enraged Lightning shouted as he chased the gamer boy down.

“Oh! And as for Dakota’s annoying entourage, Chef?” The host asked to which his cohost slingshotted a stone piercing the hot air balloon sending the paparazzi flying away.

“Uhm, rude!” Dakota exclaimed.

The screen cut to the rats, besides B and Dakota, sat down while Scott stared them down, “Alright guys, Dakotas got to go, she’s only in it for the photo op!” He stated.

“Aw, hang on guys, I mean sure, she’s easily distracted but she’s also a tenth level hottie- uh, not that that’s important or anything!” Sam tried reasoning, “Lets give her a chance!” He looked around.

“A great darkness is surrounding Dakota, if she stays on the island, disaster will befall her!” Dawn warned.

“Sha-please, I think you should all get the boot after today’s performance!” Lightning rolled his eyes.

The screen panned to the elimination ceremony.

“You guys ready? Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser, but that’s one marshmallow you do NOT want to eat-“ Chef opened up the metal box holding the toxic marshmallow, “-To the votes, the following players are safe!”

“Lightning!”

“Dawn!”

“Scott!”

“And Sam!”

“Which leaves Dakota and Bev!”

“What?!” Asked Dakota as she stopped filing her nails.

“And the marshmallow of loserdom goes to..”

“DAKOTA!”

“No!” She cried, “This has to be a mistake, I didn’t get my spinoff series yet, NOOOO!!” The blonde shouted as she ran away while Sam sighed.

**Confessional**

Man, I can’t believe Dakota’s gone, I was ready to repeatedly ask her out and get turned down all season!” Sam said sadly as he sighed again.

**End Confessional**

“Any last words before you ride the hurl of shame Dakota?” Asked Chris.

“Uhm, yeah! First of all-“ Chef flung her away before she could start, “AHHHHH!!!!” She shouted.

“It was a rhetorical question!” He laughed.

“Two hurls down, eleven to go, who will be eliminated next? Tune in and find out on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Chris announced.

Chapter Text

“Previously on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, we learned that although our campers are here to win, they’re all losers in one way or another!” The screen showed Scott being chased by a massive beaver.

“Really, really, big losers.” The contestants were seen being shocked as they owned up to their secrets, “It was a psychological butt kicking that quickly turned literal!” Lightning got flung in the air as a massive boot kicked him from behind, “And comical then hysterical!” The screen showed all of them being beat up again and again.

“But in the end, Dakota got the biggest boot of all, buh bye!!!” Chris waved as the blonde got flung off the island, “I love my job! Stay tuned as more things blow up, more contestants throw up, and some even try to hook up!” He listed.

“Right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Shouted the host.
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The screen opened to a mutant rat scurrying out of a bush right as an eagle attempted to catch it. The rodents eyes grew green as it zapped the eagle before it continued speeding into the main lodge where all the contestants were seated.

Sam took a bite out of his breakfast before coughing harshly and flinging the bowl away, “Eugh, now I know why gruel rhymes with cruel..” He muttered before looking up to Scott whose face was covered with gruel, “Oh, sorry ma-“ The gamer got cut off as Scott threw a spoon at his chin.

**Confessional**

The country boy laughed as he sharpened a stick with Fangs tooth, “Pfft, wimp! I grew up in a dirt farm, I can always chomp on a clawed if I get the munchies!” He boasted before biting into it. His teen immediately shattered.

**End Confessional**

Cameron choked and coughed as Anne Maria sprayed her hair from beside him.

“Hm?” She looked to the tiny guy, “Sorry short stuff, on the upside, now your lungs are water proof!” The New Jersey girl shrugged.

“W-wow, th-thanks…” Cameron wheezed.

Meanwhile, Brick and Jo were competitively seeing who could eat all their gruel first. The two ate faster before the former paused.

“AGH-“ His breath hitched as his spoon got stuck in his throat.

“Easy jarhead, don’t wet your panties!” Jo mocked before punching his stomach which effectively got the spoon out and towards the opposite of them where Zoey and Mike were.

“Oh my God yeah! We had this cranky lunch lady, everyone called her grand-“ The redhead got cut off as the spoon hit her head making her scowl at the pair in front of them.

“Darn you kids, back in my day we ate with our hands like decent folks!” Beatrice sneered as she leaned on the table for support.

Mike chuckled, “Is that your impression of your lunch lady?” He asked playfully, “That’s hilarious!” He laughed nervously as ‘Zoey’ continued to scowl at him.

**Confessional**

Zoey sighed, “Ok, ok.. I- I have multiple personality disorder.” She stated, “I can’t help it! When my emotions get REALLY strong in different situations they start fronting and try to handle the situation themselves!” She pulled on her hair in annoyance.

**End Confessional**

Zoey blinked at everyone staring at her oddly before Jo spoke up.

“Lose the old lady impression, it offends my sense of victory” She started, “But speaking of victory, that Russian gymnast act, ‘Viktoriya’, how DO you suddenly have such strength and precision?” The blonde looked curiously.

“I was on a gymnastics team in middle school! And I was ALWAYS a fan of this one Russian gymnast” She excused but cut Jo off before she could ask another question, “-Whose name I can’t really remember at the moment!” Zoey chuckled nervously.

“Man, theres got to be some protein in here somewhere?!” Lightning scooped up some gruel before also getting into a coughing fit.

“Don’t worry, I’ll save you!” Dawn walked to him calmly before preforming the heimlich maneuver on him causing the jock to cough out a beetle.

She picked up the critter as Lightning wiped a bead of sweat off his face, “Whew, thanks creepy girl!” He grinned as Dawn hummed as if she paid zero mind to him.

“For what? You’re safe now little one.” She scratched the top of the beetles head.

“Look!” Cameron called over, “A cute little apodemus sylvaticus!” He pointed to the same rat from the intro before it started floating with its eyes starting to glow.

“AHHHHHH!!!” Everyone shouted as camera showed the lodge shaking right as they all poured out from the door.

“Wait!” Mike yelled, “Zo-“

Said girl got tossed from the door causing the brunette boy to yelp and run after her.

“ZOEY I GOT YOU!” He yelled before she crashed onto him.

“ATTENTION CAMPERS!” Chris’s voice boomed from the speakers, “Please head to the looming tragedy that is Mount Looming Tragedy, your race begins NOW!” His blow horn played at that call.

“MAGGOTS HO!” Shouted Jo as she lead the contestants to the mountain.

The group arrived with Jo coming first while Cameron barely caught up.

“Did we win?” Asked Sam before Cameron rushed to the nearest bush to empty his stomach as the others recoiled.

“If we were hamsters, I would’ve eaten you by now.” The blonde stated raising an eyebrow before Chris whistled to them.

“Ok mutant food, on with the challenge!” He announced, “Part one is an uphill battle, you have to climb all the way up to that cliff!” The host gestured upwards, “First team to the top gets an advantage in part two, you can climb with your hands or use whatever you find in our junk pile!” He pointed to the junkyard beside the mountain.

“Don’t worry, this junkyard doesn’t have a dog, IT HAS A GIANT MUTANT BEETLE!”

The beetle was the size of a car and poked its head out the pile and hissed at the contestants. They all gasped besides Dawn who looked like she was reading its expression.

“Big guys a bit of a hoarder, his estate is full of useful crud and disgusting crud!” The contestants narrowly avoided a toilet flung their way, “That is, if you can get near it!” Laughed Chris before Chef blew a giant horn from the top of the mountain, “IT IS ON!”

“Let’s hustle maggots, double time!” Shouted Jo.

Cameron wheezed, “I- I’m doing it!” He exclaimed before he lost his footing, “NOOOO!!” He shouted as he fell down in slow motion before hitting the very nearby ground.

“You got this Cam!” Yelled Mike hanging from a branch before it started shaking from the wind, “GAH!” He yelped before a hand outreached to him.

“You fall off cliffs often?” Asked Zoey.

“Do you get thrown out of buildings frequently?” The Indie boy rebutted with a grin.

“Move it maggots!” Instructed Jo before looking to Brick, “Parents made me a climbing wall playpen” She explained.

“Impressive, I conquered the rock at a sergeant junior boot camp, dislocated my hip getting the obstacle course badge” He remarked as Jo looked somewhat concerned, “Check this out!” He bent his hip before his arm made a sickening crunch.

“Nice, and where did you learn to dislocate your arm?” Asked the blonde.

“J-just now..” He winced.

“SHA-ZAM, SHA-ZOOM, SHA-“ Lightning shouted before Scott cut him off.

“Sha- shut your mouth for once!” He yelled.

“Get ready to lose to a girl again!” Laughed Jo as she continued her trek.

“What girl? Who’s he talkin’ about?” The jock questioned.

“And will the lady be participating?” Chris asked to Anne Maria pointedly.

“Pfft, have you seen my nails?” She asked, “These are why I drive with my feet!” The tanned girl rolled her eyes.

Meanwhile, Dawn struggled getting up due to her small stature as Sam slid down the rock as he sighed.

“And that’s all i’m doing, good night everyone.” He said despondently.

“Sam wait!” The aura whisperer called, “I sense B has a plan!” She explained.

“Cool, just hope it doesn’t involve climbing.” The gamer said tiredly.

“SHA-WHOOPS!” Lightning ‘accidentally’ kicked down a pile of big rocks at Mike and Zoey.

“AHHH!!” They both shouted as they fell down accidentally catching Cameron with them.

“Eughh..” Cameron reached out to Anne Maria for help before she slapped him away.

“Don’t touch the hair!” She sneered.

B tried reaching out for a barrel of toxic waste before the massive beetle blew fire towards him causing the silent boy to jump back.

“Aw c’mon! Fire too?! Seriously!?” Cried Sam.

“We must distract this tortured soul!” Dawn quipped as she ran towards the pile.

B shielded himself from the flames with a fridge door as Dawn looked around for items to help.

She found an ocarina from the pile and shook it out of the pile.

“Toss it over!” Shouted Sam, “I’ve got Ocarina of Time back home AND beat it over twenty times!” He waved over before the girl threw it to him.

The gamer started playing but the poor quality of the ocarina made the tune come out badly.

“GAH!” He yelped as the beetle scurried to him and started blowing fire before starting to chase him, “THE CONSOLE PLAYS BETTER MUSIC!!!” Sam shouted.

Zoey and Mike both helped up Cameron before the latter looked to B pulling a barrel of toxic waste.

“Hey! The rats have the right idea, maybe we could use something from the trash pile?” Mike pointed.

Chef looked down at the contestants from the top of the mountain where piles of massive ice cubes were piled. His walkie talkie buzzed as Chris called him over.

“You know what to do, ice em!” The host instructed as the veteran smirked at the nearby Lightning.

“Chef! Make way for the Lightning, SHA-BAM!” The jock shouted confidently, “SHA-BOOM, SHA-FUUUUUU” He shouted as Chef dropped an ice block to him knocking both the jock and Scott off the mountain.

Jo fared better as she dodged every ice cube her way, “Gotta get up pretty early Chef!” She mocked.

Brick climbing up and put one hand on a ledge before the cohost smashed an ice cube at the hand turning it red, “AGH!!” He yelped.

Anne Maria continued spraying her hair before Jo called her over, “Hey poof head!” She shouted, “Too bad they don’t make spray on style, you could use some!” She laughed.

The tanned girl grasped her can so hard that it exploded in her hand, “What’chu say to me?!” She asked walking up to the mountain, “OH IT IS ON!” Anne Maria threatened.

The girl climbed up before Chef threw an ice cube at her which broke on impact with her hair, “Hey! QUIT IT!” She sneered punching another ice cube with her fist, “I’m comin’ for you pasty!”

Jo grinned.

**Confessional**

“Every team has a weak link, as leader it’s my job to find that link and manipulate it into doing whatever I want!” The blonde explained, “Hah, leadership has its perks.” She said thoughtfully.

**End Confessional**

“C’mon!” Mike tossed up a lasso to a nearby branch, “Lets get climbing!” He instructed as Zoey followed by with two plungers while Cameron was able to lift himself up with double sided tape.

“F-feel free to help any time!” Sam called out as he got continuously beat up by the beetle.

Dawn looked to the beetle curiously before an idea sparked, “Wait! Is this why you’re so distraught?” She asked as she cupped the baby beetle from earlier and showed it to the massive bug.

The beetle let go of Sam and watched as its baby crawled to it, the mother beetle then let it on their head and crawled away.

“That was beautiful.” Dawn smiled.

“Ughh.. I can taste my spine..” Sam wheezed.

Meanwhile, B had an invention going as the others walked up to him.

“Baking soda, a broken chair?!” Cried Sam, “I was clobbered by a giant fire-breathing beetle so you could collect this!?!” He asked incredulously.

B gestured for them to come over to the couch as Lightning shrugged and walked up to him along with the others.

They all piled on while Scott rolled his eyes and held onto the arm of the couch uncaringly before B sparked two wires.

The couch flew up immediately from this.

“SHA-BOOM FELLAS!” Lightning cheered as Mike looked at the flying couch agape.

Jo laughed as she got up first before Chefs jaw dropped at the screaming teens dropping down from above.

The blonde closed her eyes and looked away at the impact before Dawn started talking.

“You did it B, we won the challenge!” She gasped as Sam and Lightning cheered.

Scott then fell on the ground near them, “Ow..”

**Confessional**

“Ok seriously, Beverly the explosive experts mime has to GO!” The farm boy exclaimed.

**End Confessional**

“Slow your role natures nurse, I say who wins!” Chris flew up with his jet pack as Jo cackled.

“The rats! Thanks to B!” They continued cheering, “See how I do that better?” He asked.

“Wait a minute, I got up here first, WE won!” Jo argued as Brick walked up near her.

“We won?!” He asked as he raised his arms to cheer, “AUGH!” The cadet yelped nursing his dislocated arm.

“Nope, first TEAM to the top wins, that means the whole team, you’re still missing some members.” Explained the host.

“Pshh, whatever.” Jo scoffed before Anne Maria made her way up.

“YOU’RE GONNA DIE BLONDIE!” Shouted the tanned girl holding her fist out before Jo moved out of the way leading to her punching Bricks arm.

“AHH- oh wait it’s fixed!” The cadet looked to his arm, “Thanks so muAHHHHH!!” He tripped off the ledge and crashed on every ledge, “My other arm..” He winced.

“Who else is heading for a fall?” Asked Chris, “Literally, find out after the break!” He grinned.

“I alsho bisht my thounge!” (I also bit my tongue!) Brick shouted.

Chapter Text

The camera panned to the contestants shivering in the snow as multiple machines blew harsh wind at their direction.

“Greetings ice teens!” Shouted Chris as he and Chef pulled up in a snowmobile, “Cold enough for ya?” He asked cockily.

The contestants all continued shivering.

“I’ll take that as a yes, time for part two of today’s challenge!” The host announced, “Capture the snow fort!”

“To win, you either have to demo the enemies fort or capture the flag and bring it back to your own fort.” He explained, “Rats won the first part SO they get first dibs on the forts.” Chris grinned.

“S-sha-easy, t-the c-c-castle!” Lightning managed to stutter out.

“Nuh uh, g-gotta be a trick, nice on the outside must mean nasty on the inside.” Scott butted in, “W-we’ll take the shack.” He pointed ahead as he and the others trudged towards the shoddily built snow fort.

“I-I hope it has a f-fire place..” Sam shivered.

The screen cut to the inside of the rats fort which looked even worse on the inside.

“G-great, the crappiness is thorough.” Sam muttered before he and the rest of the team glared at Scott who smiled sheepishly.

**Confessional**

“All part of the plan..” Scott stated nervously.

“Is it hot in here all of a sudden?”

**End Confessional**

Meanwhile, the maggots were cheering for Scotts stupidity.

“Haha!” Anne Maria cackled, “What a bunch o’ sucker’s, maggots rule!” She cheered.

“Yes! This battle is so ours!” Remarked Brick.

“Yeah!” Zoey cheered before high-fiving Bricks bad hand.

“AUGH!” The cadet cried causing the others to wince.

“Listen up los- players!” Chris shouted from his megaphone, “Here’s how it works, use the shovel in each fort to fire your collection of mystery snow balls, which you could fire at each other’s forts!”

“Awesome!” Scott cheered, “I took out my uncles left eye with a meat ball this way!” He said as the others looked to him incredulously.

“WHY ARE THEY CALLED MYSTERY SNOW BALLS?” Shouted Mike.

“Because they all inflict major damage, thanks to the secret weapon hidden inside each ball, but some will damage YOU-“ A snowball in the maggots cabin screeched, “-So choose wisely, each team has to elect a captain to command and conquer, STARTING NOW!” Chris announced.

“As team captain, I say we-“

“As team captain, I say we-“

Jo and Brick glared at each other before the former spoke up, “Thumb wrestle, stat.” She declared as the two did as that.

The outcome was Brick having another broken bone, “OW!” He yelped shaking his hand before saluting, “Never met a girl stronger than me captain.” He stated, “Not even my ma!”

**Confessional**

“Huh, seems Brick’s a gentleman..” Jo rubbed her chin in thought, “He hardly tried.” She said.

“And chivalry is a weakness I could take advantage of.” She smirked.

**End Confessional**

“Brick, Lazy-“ She pointed to Anne Maria, “Mike, you’re on offence, your mission? Capture the enemies flag.” The blonde instructed, “The rest of us will defend the fort and fire the snow balls.”

Zoey grabbed Mikes hand before he was about to walk off, “Don’t have another near death experience out there, I won’t be out there to save your life.” She grinned.

“And I won’t be able to catch you in time if you come flying out the snow fort this time.” The boy laughed shortly, “I-I’m gonna go over there.” He pointed away and walked off.

**Confessional**

“Isn’t Zoey the best?” Mike asked with a hand cupping his face, “Nobody back home ever treated me as nicely as she did.”

“I used to think meeting someone like Zoey would be imaginary like elves and the queen of England!” He said factually.

**End Confessional**

“I’m captain, live with it.” Scott said before Lightning could, “B, Dawn, and I stay here, Lightning and Sam will capture their maggot-y flag.” He instructed.

“Um.” Sam raised his hand, “Maybe someone with a little more leg-foot coordination should-“

“AND GO!” Shouted Chris from his megaphone

“Let’s book it!” Lightning ran off followed by Sam.

“Great, more running.” Sam muttered.

The blaring sun peeked past the grey clouds while Chris and Chef sipped on coconut drinks.

“Hurry up, my ice is melting, and your forts will to if the sun gets much higher!” The host warned.

Sam panted as he struggled to keep up on running before he tripped and slid on the ice, “Looks like the thunder is gonna ride before the lightning!” He exclaimed as he slid past Lightning, “I’m thunder!” He then fell into the icy water below and resurfaced inside an ice cube.

Chef cackled as Chris grinned.

“Forgot to tell ya, No Mans Land is more like No Mans Water!” He yelled.

“-No i’m not gonna listen to the snowballs, i’m gonna chuck it!” Scott said in exasperation to Dawn while B walked away to a sleet of ice and pulled out carving tools.

“But it’s full of negative energy!” Dawn tried reasoning.

“So am I-“ The snowball blew up in Scotts face and left soot everywhere.

“You weren’t held enough as a child.” The aura reader said sympathetically as Scott gave her a ‘How did you know’ face.

**Confessional**

The country boy looked like he was accessing childhood trauma before looking at the camera, “O-ok, she’s gotta go too.” He shivered.

**End Confessional**

“Just pick one already!” Shouted Scott.

“This one!” Dawn pointed as she started clapping.

The ginger flung the snowball which landed on the opposing team’s tower which shook the structure.

“Hm.” He hummed, “Lucky guess..” Scott rolled his eyes.

“C’mon people, we’ve got to attack!” Shouted Jo.

“Can’t!” Cameron shouted clinging onto their flag, “I’m guarding the flag!” He yelled.

Jo and Zoey turned their head at the sound of hissing as Anne Maria put on another coat of hairspray.

“Hey sprayhead, didn’t I tell you to go capture their flag?” Jo asked questioningly.

“I ain’t riskin’ fly-aways!” The tanned girl responded as she pet her hair.

The blonde scoffed and responded by chucking Anne Maria’s hairspray out into the open.

“NOO!!” She shouted, “Oh this ain’t over!” The New Jersey girl said pointedly before running out of the fort, “Lousy Jo makin’ me run out here!”

Meanwhile Jo laughed, “Too easy!”

“Incoming, twelve o’ clock!” Brick and Mike ducked from an incoming snow ball.

“Hey guys, wait up!” Anne Maria called not noticing the snowball hit her hair.

The cadet grinned while Mike looked worried, “Oh no, we shouldn’t!” He whispered.

“I’m afraid we have no choice!” Shouted Brick as he shoved Anne Maria forward.

“Hey, quit pushin’!” She shouted as snow balls hit her hair while Brick and Mike hid behind her.

“Don’t worry buddy, Lightning will get you out!” The jock pulled Sam out the water, “After we win-“ He got pelted by a snowball.

The Mutant Maggots flung a massive snowball to the Toxic Rats which broke on impact and revealed the massive beetle from the first challenge.

“Woah!” Scott tried calming it down, “Remember her? She organised your family reunion!” He pointed to Dawn.

The aura whisper waved the beetle and her baby.

“Don’t hurt us, hurt them!” The farm boy pointed to the maggots fort as the beetles jumped out and went after the fort.

“I didn’t know you were a beetle whisper!” Dawn smiled to Scott.

“Hmph.” Scott grunted as he walked away followed by the blonde.

Meanwhile, B’s plan was set in action as he placed a circular piece of ice onto the top of their fort as the sun hit it just right leading the suns rays to hit the maggots fort.

“Uh oh, we’re melting!” Cameron exclaimed.

“Zoey! Do your Viktoriya thing and jump on the catapult!” Demanded Jo.

“I-I can’t control the- I mean I need to do my warm ups first!” Zoey excused as Cameron realised what was going on.

The bubble boy tried doing his best announcer voice, “And first up on the vault, it’s five time Russian champ-“

“It’s VIKTORIYA!” The Russian lady exclaimed as she front-flipped on the tip of the shovel handle and flew off.

“Get the flag Viktoriya!” Jo instructed.

“Guys, look it’s Zoey!” Mike pointed upwards.

“She’s gonna get the flag!” Brick quipped as Anne Maria looked up as well.

The maggots cheered for her from outside and inside their fort before she face-planted in the rats fort.

The red-head groaned at the cold impact as loud shouting and cheering rang in her ears.

“ZOEY?!” Shouted Mike.

“That’s not Zoey.” Dawn stated, “Nor Viktoryia.” She added.

“I don’t care who that is, get her out of my-“

“Step aside losers!” The party-girl grinned kicking Scott out of the way as Dawn narrowly missed her.

Anne Maria and Mike stepped inside to check the commotion as the girl shook the rats flag out the snow.

“You bozo’s lookin’ for this?” She asked in a New Jersey accent that could rival Anne Marias.

“Oh wow!” The tanned girl in question looked impressed.

“Hey! That’s our flag, hand it over!” Scott tried wrestling for it but was shoved away with ease.

“C’mon Zoey, we gotta take the flag to our fort!” Mike exclaimed to her as the girl raised an eyebrow.

“You ain’t tellin’ me what to do scrawny, and the names Violeta to ya!” She huffed and used the flag pole to push him away.

“Ow!” He rubbed his arm and looked to the redhead with a mixture of confusion and hurt.

“Well girl, where’d ya been this entire game!” Anne Maria linked her arm with Violeta who didn’t protest and gave her a smirk.

“Oh c’mon Zoey the plays over, you win best actor, now give over the flag!” Brick walked up to the two.

“Over my hot, rich, dead body you ain’t gettin’ it!” Violeta scowled as she used the flag as a weapon and hit Scott -Who tried sneaking up behind he- in the groins before smacking Brick upside the head.

Scott got flung out the fort and went agape at the maggots fort which was melting by the second while Jo tried salvaging the pieces with Cameron being beat up by the massive beetle and its child.

“I WANT MY BUBBLE I WANT MY BUBBLE!” He yelped.

“Crud.” Scott muttered before desperately looking around the ice circle and Sam who was still in the ice cube.

“Hm, try and talk your way out of this one Bev!” He grinned hitting the ice with a snowball causing it to tilt downwards as the suns rays hit Sam’s ice block and then their own fort.

B looked at the commotion agape as the magnified sun rays immediately melting the rats fortress.

“Nice magnifying lense Beverly.” Scott directed the blame to quiet boy, “THATS SABOTAGE!” He pointed as Dawn gasped.

“MAGGOTS WIN!” Announced Chris, “And here’s your reward!” He gestured to Chef tray, “McClean brand hot chocolate, scold your senses with chocolately goodness!”

The maggots cheered as B sneered to whistling Scott.

“What?” Asked Lightning before standing up, “Ey, let’s go! We gotta win this!” He shouted running forward and right into the ice water where he resurfaced in a block of ice.

Sam laughed, “Sha-Bam.” He mocked.

**Confessional**

“I achieved two things today.” Jo stated, “Win the challenge, and have Brick be my peon until I render him useless.” She smirked.

**Confessional**

“Ok, why is Anne Maria being so nice to me all of a sudden?! And why was my hair down!-“ Asked Zoey incredulously before gasping, “Wait, was Violeta there?!” She asked.

“She only fronts when-“ The redhead paused, “Oh man, this sucks!” She groaned.

**End Confessionals**

“I told you, B stands for bad man and Beverly is a bad man!” Scott shouted to his teammates.

“I never took him for that guy, but fact-wise it would seem he’s that guy.” Sam shrugged in his blanket.

“How can you trust someone who is so secretive that he doesn’t even talk?” Scott raised up, “He hates nature you know?” He whispered to Dawn.

“I’ve read B’s diary, he calls you Fizzle.” He pointed to Lightning.

“Just thought you all should know.” The ginger shrugged.

**Confessional**

“B might’ve messed with the challenge, but Sam messed with the lightning, time for thunder to say sha-bye bye.” The jock waved.

“Hey, can somebody write that down!” He looked around.

**End Confessional**

The screen opened up to the elimination ceremony.

“After another jam-packed day of losing, it all comes down to this.” Chris stated, “The following rats are safe.”

“Dawn.”

“Lightning.”

“And Scott.”

“Which leaves Bev and Sam.” The host remarked.

“At least I’m not going home first!” The latter cheered before a familiar shriek filled the air.

“AHHHHH!!” Dakota shouted as she crashed into Sam.

“Ugh, I hate it when losers get all clingy.” Chris looked to the camera with a slight smirk at that last line.

“Hey Sam!” She smiled from on top of him.

“Oh, hi Dakota!” He waved smiling back.

Chris groaned, “Dakota, you’re no longer competing, remember?” He asked.

“I don’t care about the money, like I need it.” She rolled her eyes as she detached her gliders harness off, “I just want- uhh close up please? Thank you!” Dakota blew a kiss to the screen, “I just want camera time! People need to see more of me if I want that spin-off reality series!”

The girl got dragged away by Chef.

“Remember how you got flung off last episode? That means you’re done FOREVER!” Chris shouted to her.

“No, please!” Dakota tried dragging the conversation.

“Listen kid, this is MY show-“ The host phone then rang.

“Huh?” He held his hand over the receiver, “It’s your father speaking!” Dakota smiled at that, “Hello Mr. Milton? How much money?!” He asked, “You’re back!” Chris pointed to the fame monger.

“Yes!” She cheered.

“As an intern!” He finished off.

“As an intern?! NOOO!!” Dakota shrieked getting taken away while Chris rolled his eyes.

“And, the toxic marshmallow goes to..”

“B!” The host exclaimed.

The quiet boy glared at Scott while his toxic marshmallow sunk into the ground.

“Any final words Beverly?” The host asked to the boy as he climbed into the catapult, “Any words at all?”

B opened his mouth and took a deep breathe in and said-

“Times up!” Chris clapped as B got flung away.

“AHHHHH!!” Shouted the quiet boy.

“Come back for even more mutants, mayhem, and manipulation, next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Shouted Chris

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, eleven bumbling buffoons battled it out on a brutal buffet of bombastica!” The screen showed the contestants trying to climb up the mountain.

“Why so many B words? BECAUSE, B proved he was a brave and brilliant improviser, who scored big time for his team!” The silent boy was seen carving out a magnifying glass made of ice to melt the other team’s fort.

“Until bitter teammate Scott botched it on purpose, and B got the boot!” The boy was seen being eliminated.

“And now, tonights challenge is about FEAR and everyone knows fear is a dish best served in the dark!” Chris cackled before the screen panned out to Chef beside him.

“Huh..? Chef!” The host complained.

“Wardrobe was all out of vampire costumes…” Chef responded in a sparkly performers outfit with a peacock tail in the back.

The host rolled his eyes and walked away, “It’s all scary! Other than that-“ He pointed to Chef, “-Right here, right now, on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted before cackling again.
.
.
.
.

The camera showed the moon still illuminating the sky as snoring could be heard from the cabins.

All the contestants were fast asleep besides Dawn who was meditating in her bed before a firefly flew to her ear.

“What’s that little one? Evil is lurking?” She asked, “Let me guess, Chris-“ She cut herself off and covered her ears as the hosts blow horn blasted the entire camp.

“GAHHH!!”

“RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!”

“THEY FOUND ME!”

“MOVE IT OR LOSE IT!”

“WHAT’S HAPPENING?!”

“ME FIRST!” Scott shoved Sam to the ground.

“Thanks intern!” Yelled Chris as Dakota unplugged her ear.

“Huh?!” She asked.

**Confessional**

“So after Chris agreed to let me stay, he put a restraining order on my paparazzi!!” Dakota cried, “So now I’m stuck here for NO reason, and now he’s making me, like, WORK!!” She lamented.

“Luckily I have an idea on how to still get my spin off series!” She clapped, “I’m going to hang around the other contestants while i’m on duty so I can get more camera time!” Dakota explained

“If I’m going to stay on this island, I have to make the best of it.”

**End Confessional**

“Hi Dakota!” Sam waved.

“Huh?! Speak up!!” She shouted as her ears were still ringing before being shoved away by a screen.

“Challenge time!” Announced Chris excitedly.

“What?! Now?! In the middle of the night??” Asked Brick, “When it’s all.. y’know, dark?!” He said nervously garnering a few looks.

**Confessional**

“Ever since I was born, I hated the dark.” The cadet looked around.

“With the creeks, a-and the ‘who’s that!!’ and the g-get away!-“ He got cut off as the light in the confessional shut off.

“AHHHH!!!” He shouted.

**End Confessional**

“Your challenge: a scavenger hunt for three piece souvenirs, your locations? A haunted forest, a scary pet cemetery, and an extra spook-tacular cave!” Chris started.

“First team to each location gets a special clue, but watch out for booby traps, I really went to town with them!” He grinned manically as the contestants looked wary, “So move fast and stick together, you’ll be penalised for each player you lose!” He warned.

“Uhm, what does the spider represent?” Asked Cameron.

“Oh yeah, there’s a something kinda gigantic mutant spider roaming around the island!” The host shrugged setting off multiple shouts of protests.

“What’s on the louvre’s?!” Dakota shouted still unable to hear properly.

“A GIGANTIC MUTATED SPIDER!!” Sam yelled in her ears.

“Where, WHERE?!!?!?” Asked a frightened Cameron.

**Confessional**

“I have a severe case of arachnophobia..” Stated the bubble boy, “Spiders are just so creepy!” He exclaimed.

“Literally, anything with that many legs must be EVIL!” He shivered before a spider dropped down next to him.

“AHHHHH!!!”

**End Confessional**

“There’s nothing to fear but mortal terror itself!” Shouted Chris, “Talk soon!” He blew his blow horn as the contestants all ran off.

Dakota just stared.

“Get to work lackey.” The host rolled his eyes.

“WHAT?!” She asked again.

The toxic rats made their way into the forest first as Lightning arrived before the others.

“WOO! First!! That’s right!!” The jock cheered for himself.

The speakers then turned on, “Welcome to the haunted forest, your clue can be found in the base of this tree!” Stated Chris as Lightning put his hand in the dirt.

“AHH!!”

“In a bear trap!” The host cackled.

“Here creepy girl, read the clue!” Lightning, whose hand was still stuck in the trap, said as he handed it to Dawn.

“Well, well, well!” Jo snickered, “What do we have here?” She asked.

“Hey! Find your own piece of paper!” The jock snarked.

“C’mon, let the runts have their clue, I’ve got a plan.” The blonde whispered to the maggots as they ran off.

“So what’s your big plan?” Zoey asked looking around the area.

“Find a place to hide so we can follow the rats and their clue to OUR first souvenir, let’s hide in that bush!” Jo instructed.

The group hid inside the thorny bush as they yelped and complained about the spikes.

“Psst, here they come!” Whispered Mike.

“Inside a knot is a nest, your souvenir lives with a pest, find Polaris to travel north west?” Dawn read, “Polaris is the north star!” She gasped.

“The north star is right there!” Scott pointed in front of him, “So this way is north west, theres a path!” The farm boy ran followed by the others.

“They’re getting away!” Jo grunted, “C’mon!”

They all struggled getting away before Bricks head popped out the bush.

“Who’s there?!” He asked shakily as he heard a branch crack and an owl hoot.

The cadet looked at a tree hole as hundreds of glowing eyes blinked back at him.

“AHHHH!!!” He yelped as he stood up with the bush with everyone else in it still on his upper half and ran away.

“Inside the knot is a nest, hey Dawn?” Asked Sam, “What was the middle part?” The boy looked behind him to see that nobody was there, “DAWN?! DAWN!?” He shouted.

“What? Did we lose the weirdo?” Asked Scott as Sam gulped.

“We get a penalty for each lost player right?” The gamer questioned.

“And theres some kind of wacky spider crawling around right?!” Added Lightning.

“We’re looking for a knot in a nest right?!” Scott looked around.

“There it is!” Lightning pointed, “Sha-score!” He said in a sing-songy tone.

“Wait, what about Dawn?” Sam asked.

The jock looked around the tree hole as a massive red eye stared directly at him before three massive tentacles opened from behind the tree.

“AUGH!” Lightning cried as the slimy arm wrapped around his neck while the other ones slapped him in the face.

“Dude, I’ve seen this in sea creatures five!” Shouted Sam, “To fight a squid, you have to duck, duck, duck, punch!” He exclaimed.

“Or we could throw rocks?” Offered Scott.

“Oh, ok?” Said Sam.

The two redheads aimed miserably before the creature dropped Lightning on the ground and tried getting the other two.

“Duck, duck, punch!” Sam instructed as Scott got slapped away by the creatures tentacle, “No, you’re not doing it right! You have to-“ The arm wrapped around his foot, “Uh oh-“

Lightning got off the ground and glared at the creature slapping Sam.

“No calamari does that to the Lightning!” He shouted crawling up the tree, “SHA-BAM!” He punched the creatures eye causing it to shout in pain and drop Sam.

“Aw yeah, THE KEY!” Shouted the jock before dropping it as a spider web slung him away.

“Eurgh..” The gamer groaned as Scott picked up the key.

“Jack pot!” Scott cheered.

“What happened?!” Asked Sam, “Lightning?!” Lightning?!”

“LIGHTNING?!”

Unbeknownst to them, another person was staring right back at them.

“Guess he’s gone.” The dirt eater shrugged, “So is the squid, and WE got the key!” He laughed.

“But we’ve lost two players?!” Quipped the other.

“Yeah, two players that stink at this game, c’mon let’s go.” Scott glared.

“Err, well no but I-“

“As a gamer, I thought you’d understand.”

Just then, the Mutant Maggots arrived.

“Heheh, gee, maybe we should check for the object way over there with the rest of our teammates!” Sam chuckled nervously, “Cause it’s not just the two of us.. heh..”

Cameron rubbed his chin questioningly before looking up and gasping, “Look!” He pointed, “Team colors!” The boy exclaimed.

“Could be a trap, we should send in our most expendable player.” Jo crossed her arms as Brick walked up to her.

“No one’s expendable!” He argued.

“Do you want to play nice? Or do you wanna win?” Asked Jo as she shoved Brick and Mike away before throwing Cameron into the tree hole.

“A key!” Shouted the bubble boy, “This must be our first souvenir!” He pointed out before dropping to the ground as the key fell next to Mike and Zoey.

“Awesome!” The latter cheered, “Great job Cam!” She helped up the smaller boy as Mike internally swooned.

**Confessional**

“Zoey is SO sweet.” The Indie boy sighed happily, “The way she’s always encouraging Cameron is so nice of her to do!” He exclaimed.

“Her commitment to going into character is a little strange..” He added, “But hey, nobodies perfect right?”

**Confessional**

“Isn’t Mike just, perfect?” Asked Zoey, “He’s all I think about!” She smiled.

“At least when I’m the one fronting.” She laughed half-heartedly.

**End Confessional**

Zoey bent down to grab the key while a spider web latched onto Mikes head, “Hey Mike, do you think this key will open something in the challenge?” She asked before looking around, “Mike?”

“Wait. Where’s Mike?!” She cried calling out his name running off.

“And we call off the search and forge ahead.” Jo shrugged walking away.

“That’s against the cadet code.. never leave a soldier behind!” Shouted Brick as Zoey ran behind him still calling Mikes name.

“We’re not leaving her, she left us.” Stated Jo, “That means she’s A-wall, now move it GI-Joke!” She sneered.

**Confessional**

“Jo is like this bug.” Brick pointed to his arm, “She’s always trying to get under my skin!”

The bug then literally got under his skin.

“OW!”

**End Confessional**

“Uh, it’s not like I don’t enjoy this leisurely pace, but shouldn’t we be running faster?” Asked Sam to Scott.

“Relax, I know what I’m doing.” The other rolled his eyes.

**Confessional**

“I’m heading us back to last place where we belong.” Scott chuckled.

“Another elimination ceremony for the rats and its bye-bye Sam or Lightning, I can’t decide!” He said while carving a stick.

“I’m like a kid in a candy store full of suckers!” He laughed, “And I’m gonna- like, err.. break em’ and stuff!” Scott exclaimed.

**Confessional**

“C’mon let’s rock this!” Shouted Sam running faster, “With Dakota voted off, I’ve got killer focus and energy to burn!” He shouted uncharacteristically, “Check it!” He swooped the key away and ran off.

“Rock!” He jumped over, “Tree stump!” He walked around, “A mysterious clump of dirt-“ He walked over the landmine and flew onto another and another and another.

“Thanks for clearing the way!” Jo grinned.

“MIKE, MIKE?!”

“Thanks focus boy.” Scott sneered as he nabbed the key right back.

“I think I can taste my liver..” Focus boy groaned.

The maggots gasped for air as they finally arrived to their next destination.

“WELCOME TO THE WAWANAKWA PET CEMETERY!” Chris shouted from the speakers.

“We’re first string bean!” Jo slung an arm around Camerons shoulder, “Now go get the clue.” She shoved him away.

“AUGH!”

The bubble boy opened a coffin which revealed some parchment with numbers written on it.

“Aren’t three sixes supposed to be evil?” He asked.

Jo looked to the others, “Let’s split up and look for numbers!” She instructed.

“Split up?” Asked Brick nervously.

The screen cut to him walking backwards looking around for the clue.

He stopped before a tombstone right as the ground gave up under him and broke.

He yelped, “HELP, HELP! TOO DARK, TOO DARK!!” He cried as Jo peered at the hole in the ground.

“Brick, take my hand!” She shouted as she pulled him up.

“So dark.. so dark..” He hyperventilated so the blonde did the next reasonable move.

“PULL. YOURSELF. TOGETHER.” She slapped his face at each word.

Brick saw the others staring at him before he found out why.

“I-I it was wet down there and I landed on my-“ He stuttered, “I just- I’m gonna go away for a moment..” He ran off.

The cadet looked around and hid behind a tree before eight spiked legs latched onto him.

“AHHH!!” The others heard.

“Brick?!” Asked Cameron as he and the others ran to where the cadet once was, “He was just here a second ago?!” The bubble boy muttered.

Everyone but Jo gasped.

“Oh well, two words: dead weight.” She rolled her eyes.

“Hey, Brick may not be attractive in any way, but he is still a person.” Anne Maria crossed her arms and glared back to the blonde.

“Exactly!” Zoey backed her up, “Your attitude is the worst!” She pointed to Jo.

“It’s called a winning attitude, get used to it or get out of the way.” Jo glared back at them.

“Find the souvenir, hide the souvenir, lose the game..” Scott whispered to himself opening up a coffin only to be greeted by Fang.

“AHHH!!” He yelped before shutting the coffin tight.

“AHHH!!” He shouted again as Fang jumped out and chased after him.

“Hey, this grave smells like french fries-“ Sam got cut off as Scott shoved him out of the way.

The farm boy jumped over a mound of dirt and ran away as Fang found themself in the ditch behind the dirt trying to follow him.

The shark grumbled loudly.

Dakota recognised the camera following her carrying a bucket and smiled and waved before throwing the substance inside the bucket in a hole.

“HEY!” Sam’s voice echoed back to her.

“Sam?” She asked.

“Dakota! How’s it going?” He asked back.

“Sorry about the booby trap, Chris made me fill it with kitchen grease.” She responded back as she wiped her hands clean.

“That must be whats attracting these giant maggots!” Sam exclaimed before yelping as the creatures bit him.

Dakota winced and looked to him apologetically, “Wow.. I feel so.. bad?” She said to herself, “I even feel like.. apologising?” The blonde said questioningly before dropping the bucket.

“If this is what it feels like to feel bad for someone else, I don’t like it, I’m out!” She walked off.

“WAIT, A LITTLE HELP?!” Sam cried.

Meanwhile, Chris laughed at the contestants misery from behind a screen as usual.

“Will anyone even make it to the spooky cave?” He asked, “And if so, how could they possibly make it all the way the finish line?!”

“Less brain, more pain, when we return!” The host grinned.

Chapter Text

“MIKE?!” Zoey shouted from atop a dead tree, “C’MON MAN, TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE!” She took a step forward causing the branch beneath her to give out.

“AHHH!!” She yelled as she landed on top of a tombstone.

“Oh my gosh, Zoey!” Anne Maria exclaimed, “I think I found the clue!” She pointed to the tombstones header, “June 6, 1806! I’m no algebra expert, but ain’t that six, six, eighteen six?!” The tanned girl gasped as the red- head on the tombstone blinked.

She squinted her eyes at the bright lanterns and moon illuminating the area as she shook her head.

“Augh, where’s the damn sun?!” Cried Violeta, “How’s a girl supposed to get a tan at this time!?” She asked as Anne Maria squealed in excitement.

“Violeta!” The New Jersey girl cheered.

**Confessional**

“Whenever we’re alone, she drops the Zoey act!” Anne Maria grinned, “It’s cause i’m just THAT irresistible.” She shrugged.

“And who could blame her? The tan, the hair, I mean look at me, I’m hot!” The tanned girl boasted.

**End Confessional**

“Six, six, eighteen six!” Exclaimed Cameron as Jo walked up to them, “Anne Maria, you found it!” He cheered.

“And check it out, there’s a keyhole!” Anne Maria pointed, “Yeah! Who’s the sharpest tool on the christmas tree now?” She looked to Jo smugly.

“JUST USE THE KEY ALREADY!!” Jo snapped back.

“Yeesh! Ok, keep your sweatpants on!” The tanned girl rolled her eyes and walked off.

She twisted the key in the hole causing a coffin to spring out from beneath her.

“AHHHH!!”

Everyone winced as she crashed into a nearby tombstone.

The coffin door opened to reveal four flashlights, “Cool! Flashlights, these’ll come in handy!” The bubble boy smiled.

“Let’s get moving.” Jo pointed as Cameron ran, “Okay strong girl, make yourself useful and put that coffin back so the rats won’t know where to look.” She ordered to Violeta.

The girl cracked her knuckles and punched the coffin right back underground not knowing Sam was spying from the tree behind the tombstone.

The gamer started shouting bird calls to get Scotts attention as said boy walked up to him and slapped Sam upright.

“What the heck are you doing?!” The farm boy asked.

“Uh, I was using animal calls to signal you?” Sam explained, “Team maggots found the souvenirs in the tombstone over there!” He pointed to where the opposite team once was.

“Wow.” Scott drawled, “Nice work.” He rolled his eyes and walked away.

“But be careful when you use that key.” Warned Sam, “Because-“

“Zip it peepaw, just sit there and be quiet.” The farm boy sneered as he put the key in the keyhole.

“AHHHH!!”

Sam chuckled, “Tried to warn you bro.” He shrugged.

Meanwhile, Jo and Cameron were in front of the final area, the cave, as Chris’s voice boomed from the speakers.

“Welcome to the final destination!” The host cackled, “The clue is just inside the entrance.. and down the tunnel… and to total darkness.”

“Good luck!.. You’ll need it!”

The bubble boy gulped as Jo scoffed.

“Follow my lead pencil neck.” She shoved the boy as he scrambled to pick up the flashlights.

“But where are Anne Maria and Violeta?!” He asked.

“Who cares.” Jo’s voice echoed from the cave.

“VIOLETA?! ANNE MARIA!!” Shouted Cameron as he ran to find them.

Jo opened her flashlight and pointed it to a web where a skeleton wearing a mangled and ripped interns uniform was attached, “It’s so hard to find good help nowadays.” Jo grinned, “And here’s the clue.” She snatched the paper from the interns pocket.

“By hook or by crook, the end is near if you look.” She raised an eyebrow, “Ugh, who wrote these? William Shakes-“

“AUGH!” Jo shouted as a massive web got flung at her.

“Hey, Hey!” She shouted, “How dare you?!” The blonde cried as she got flung away, “NOO!!”

“Guys, guys!” Cameron shouted as he ran up to Violeta and Anne Maria, “I found where we have to go next!” He pointed.

“Guys?” He asked to the two sucking face making the boy cringe.

“C’mon guys! That’s not what Chris said when he said stick together?!” Cameron groaned as they ignored him.

“JO?!” The bubble boy shouted inside the cave, “HEY JO!?” He shouted before catching sight of the blondes flashlight on the floor, “Oh no, her flashlight, this can’t be good!” He cried, “JO!!”

“See, this is why we need to stick together!” Cameron pointed the flashlight to Violeta and Anne Maria who were still at it, “CAN YOU GUYS STOP?! WE NEED TO FOCUS!!” The boy shouted before slapping his mouth shut.

**Confessional**

“Woah.. I never actually raised my voice before.” Cameron croaked, “Wow. It actually feels kinda good!” He realised.

**End Confessional**

“See any clues Vi?” Asked Anne Maria.

“What the hecks a clue?” Violeta looked around.

“Guys, look! Over there!” Pointed Cameron, “These must be the last souvenirs!” He pointed to a rock with the image of a skeleton with multiple hooks attached on it, “I wonder what it’s for?” He wondered.

“CAMERON, LOOK OUT!” Anne Maria shouted.

“What?!” The bubble boy asked before webs spun around him completely covering his body before being flung upwards.

“AHHH!!” He shouted opening his eyes to a massive spider with glowing green eyes.

The spider flung him to a massive spider web where he saw all the other caught contestants in the same problem he was in.

“Who’s in the spider web now?” Asked Jo as her eyes were blinded by webs, “Tan job? Couch potato? Freckle face?!” She asked, “C’mon, don’t leave me hangin!”

“Just me, string bean..” Cameron shouted back.

“Wow. You lasted longer than I expected.” She said in actual amazement.

**Confessional**

“That’s the nicest thing Jo has ever said to me!” Cameron exclaimed, “Hey, I’ll take what I can get.” He slumped.

**End Confessional**

Scott and Sam finally made it into the cave with the latter arriving last.

“Hey, that must be the last souvenir!” Sam pointed, “Hey, that’s our teammates!” He pointed again, “Hey, a gigantic spider!” He pointed upwards, “Woah.. this is so cool my head is spinning, I think i’m overstimulated..” He walked away dizzily.

“Sam! Not so fa-“ Scott got cut off as Anne Maria stuck her foot out to trip him.

Scott landed on top of Sam right as the spider tied them with its web.

“Yep. Definitely overstimulated.”

“Go get the hook and we’ll win!” Anne Maria exclaimed to a disinterested Violeta, “Fine. Get the hook and you’ll get more o’ this!” She planted a kiss on Vi’s face.

Mike spluttered from the spider web, “Wha- are they-“ He cut himself off and looked to Cameron who shrugged and gave him an apologetic glance.

“WOO!! Let’s win this thing!!” Violeta cheered as she ran off.

“Sorry beanie boy, looks like reds only into rested and classy girls.” Or girls period.

“I thought Zoey liked me..?” Mike muttered sadly.

“Uh, Mike?!” Cameron shouted.

“Yes?”

“SPIDER!!!”

The two shouted as the spider crept closer.

“HELP!!” Mike yelled causing the red-head to snap her head around.

“Mike?! Wait, don’t move I’m coming!” Shouted Zoey.

“C’mon?! Get the hook not the schnook!” Anne Maria shouted.

Sweat rolled down Camerons face as the spider crept closer. The boy was shaking so hard he screwed his eyes shut before shouting and breaking away from the webs.

The boy body-slammed the spider and started hitting it with all his might, which wasn’t much.

**ConfessionalI**

“Ah, adrenaline, natures super strength formula.” He sighed, “Someone should really bottle it.” The bubble boy grinned.

**End Confessional**

“Zon’t worry, Viktoriya is here to save you all!” The lady shouted as she made a mad dash to the confused contestants.

“AHH!!” Shouted Brick as Viktoriya hopped to where he was stuck and tore it apart.

“Wow! How did you do that Zoey?! That was amazing!” Gasped Mike as the gymnast smiled proudly.

“I know Viktoriya is amazing.” She said proudly, “Why do these ropes feel so sticky?” She asked grasping onto the webs.

“Hang on everyone, i’m coming to get you!” Exclaimed Brick.

“NO! Get the hook dampy pants!” Retaliated Jo making the cadet scowl.

“I need to rescue my teammates!” He argued.

“You need to win, somebody has to!”

“But my code?! I can’t just leave you behind!”

“Cut and run soldier, that’s an ORDER!” The blonde yelled.

“Sir yes sir!” Brick yelled as he took a hook and looked to a zip line leading downwards.

Sam followed behind with Scott attached to his back.

“Sam, stop trying to be a hero, we’re hosed.” The farm boy sneered.

“Oh no, I’ve got this!” Shouted back Sam as he grabbed a hook.

“Stop being such a bully, you can’t hurt me anymore!” Cameron exclaimed to the spider as he jumped on it up and down causing the stalactites to shake.

“AAHHH!!” Brick shouted on the way down.

“I mean it! Get lost!” The short boy jumped one last time before causing the cave to start collapsing.

“HURRY UP!” Scott shouted to Sam as they escaped just in time.

Everyone groaned in pain as Zoey looked around confused.

“W- where are we? What just happened?” She asked as Brick, Scott, and Sam slid down the zip line.

“Ughh..” Brick rubbed his arm in pain as the two gingers arrived behind him.

“Why do I smell-“

“I don’t smell anything?!” Brick shouted as Chris walked up to them.

“Well, well, well, both teams made it to the finish line, some wetter than others.” The host arrived.

“Hey, that cave was leaky!” The cadet said defensively.

“Whatever, today’s winning team is… THE RATS!” He announced much to Bricks shock.

“What?! No way, I- I got here first!” He exclaimed.

“Remember when I said stick together because you’ll get a penalty for each team member you lost, yeah you lost five, Sam only lost two.” Chris explained, “So, the rats totally win!”

“YES!” Sam cheered as Scott sneered.

“NO! I should’ve just followed my own code!” Brick cried as he crumpled onto the floor.

“So true.” Chris grinned.

Cameron coughed as he walked up to where the ‘spider’ was and gasped.

“Eurgh..” Izzy groaned, “HAHA BOOM!” She shouted.

“Is that Izzy?!” Mike pointed.

“Who?!” Asked Zoey.

**Confessional**

“So turns out it was just one of the old cast members in a costume, thankfully it cured me of my arachnophobia.” Cameron smiled as a spider crawled on his finger.

“Although now I’m completely terrified of Izzy.”

**End Confessional**

The elimination ceremony started as the maggots sat down.

“Team maggots, welcome to your first elimination ceremony, and mmm, this tension is so delish I could kiss someone!” Chris grinned as Zoey looked confused to a saddened Mike and a smitten Anne Maria.

“But ‘Zoey’ already did that as it turns out!” He laughed making the redhead even more confused.

“Maybe Brick and Jo wanna kiss and make up?” He asked to the frustrated pair, “Didn’t think so, where’s Chef with the marshmallow of loserdom?” He asked.

“AHAHAHA!!” Izzy cackled as she shot another plunger at a tied up Chef.

“Excuse me Chris.” Brick stood up, “I volunteer for elimination, I don’t deserve to stay, I didn’t even follow my own code.” He sighed.

“Heh, no kidding sir leaks a lot.” Jo smirked.

“So I’m afraid of the dark, so what?! We all have fears, you would NEVER make it in my squadron!” The cadet shouted as Jo crossed her arms.

“Hold on soldier.” Chris interrupted, “Tonights eliminated maggot is tomorrow’s new rat!” He announced.

“I’m.. I’m not taking the hurl of shame?” Brick asked.

“Nope! From here on out, Brick and Jo will be fighting it out on OPPOSING TEAMS!” The host laughed.

The contestants gasped.

“Pfft, lame.” Jo rolled her eyes.

“Thank you sir, I won’t ignore the code again SIR!” Brick saluted.

“Whatever, kinda disappointing no one’s going for a catapult ride though.” He sighed as Dakota walked up to him.

“I finished filling your toilets with spring water.” The fame monger said as the host gave a sadistic grin.

“What?!”

“This is so unfair!” Shouted Dakota who was seated in the catapult, “Why am I getting eliminated twice?!” She cried.

“Relax, you’re not being eliminated, you’re welcome to swim back here, I even gave you flotation device after all.” Chris pointed.

Dakota looked to her deflated duck floatie.

“Wait, wait, wait!” She shouted, “I NEED A NEW DUUU-“ The blonde got cut off as she flung away.

“Better.” Chris grinned, “Wanna know who I’m gonna catapult of the island next? You’ll have to come back to find out, right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, ten campers went on a scavenger hunt, that was spooky!” The screen showed the contestants being followed by hundreds of eyes in the forest.

“-And very very painful!” Sam was seen being blown up in landmine, “Anne Maria and Violeta sucked face and just when we thought it couldn’t get any koo-koo for our contestants-“ The screen showed Cameron being spun in a web

“Arachne Izzy showed up to do an eight legged tap dance for our captive audience!” Izzy laughed at the contestants scared faces, “And her buddy Chef!” Chef looked annoyed as Izzy shot another plunger at his face.

“In the end, Brick left five teammates behind and volunteered for a dishonourable discharge, but I put him on the opposite team instead!” Brick was seen saluting Chris and his former teammates.

“Hey, it’s my show, I can do what I want, watch!” Chris snapped his finger to Chef holding a sleeping Dakota before throwing her into the cold lake.

“AUGH!” She yelped and took off her sleeping mask, “Where am I?!” The blonde cried before a piranha emerged from the water followed by two more.

“AHHH!!”

“Who will ride the hurl of shame next? How many times can I laugh at them before then?” Asked Chris, “Find out right now on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!!” He shouted as Dakota was still being attacked by piranhas.
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The boys in the Mutant Maggots were fast asleep while Scott tossed and turned murmuring.

“Land shark.. get away-“

He got cut off by a blaring alarm causing him to roll on the floor.

“MY EARS!!” Cried Sam jumping out of bed.

“I’M UP COACH! LIGHTNINGS UP!” The jock shouted from his bed.

“What’s happening?!” Scott asked before Lightning shoved them out of the way making them all pile onto the floor.

Meanwhile, Brick tied on his laces before shutting the alarm and stretching out of bed and stretching, “Rise and shine soldiers!” He shouted running out the cabin.

“So.. how ‘bout that new guy?..” Sam muttered.

**Confessional**

“Man, my ears haven’t rung like that since I played Guitar Band Nine on maximum rockness!” The gamer exclaimed before pulling out a console to play.

**Confessional**

“There I was, on the one-yard line ready to score a touchdown to win the super bowl..” Lightning recalled, “When the new guys alarm clock went off!! If he wakes me up one more time like that, he’s going to get struck by Lightning!” He shouted.

**Confessional**

“I’ll show you what I’m gonna do with Brick..” Scott sneered, alarm in hand, as he weakly punched the alarm clock and threw it in the toilet.

The alarm started off causing the entire confessional to shake.

“What the-“ The farm boy got cut off as the toilet sprayed water to the ceiling.

**End Confessional**

In the Toxic Rats cabin, Cameron was leaning against the wall with a notepad and pen in hand trying to listen to Zoey and the others.

“All right guys, settle down..” Zoey drawled.

“Stick ze landing Viktoriya.. practice makes perfect and..” A loud crash was heard from the girls side.

“Eurgh.. you’re goin’ down knucklehead..” Muttered Violeta.

“I’ve had it with you brats!!” Beatrice snarled before snoring again.

“Fascinating..” Cameron hummed as he wrote down on his notes.

**Confessional**

“So far, I’ve documented three separate alters in Zoey’s headspace, being around them is like having a walking talking psychology text book, and it’s a total page turner!” The bubble boy exclaimed.

**End Confessional**

Brick marched up to Dawn grabbing firewood before saluting her, “Morning fellow teammate, need assistance chopping wood?” He asked grabbing a log.

“You don’t need to help just because you were teased a lot as a child.” The aura whisperer assured making the cadet panic.

“Wha- who told you that?” He asked scratching the back of his head.

“It’s right there in your aura, between your bladder control issues and your need to be dominated.” She shrugged walking away.

“I don’t need to be dominated?! I’m large and in char-“

Suddenly someone off-screen blew a whistle, “Ten hut!” Shouted Jo.

“Sir yes sir!” Brick hit himself with the log trying to salute causing him to fall to the floor.

“Playing patty cake with the new playmates huh?” She grinned, “Well enjoy the honeymoon GI-Joke because today we’re bringing the pain!” The blonde remarked as Brick stood up.

“Negative that! Your platoon has ZERO morale, that’s what happens when you lose your best soldier!” The cadet argued back.

“Listen Brick for brains, we don’t need you, I’m a champion sprinter, shot putter, AND pilate instructor!”

“Pilate wha-“

“-And I’m whipping the rest of these limp noodles into shape!” Jo pointed to Cameron sitting by the cabins.

“How to do a push up.” He read from a book, “Step one, lie on the ground, step two, push up.” The bubble boy did as instructed before face planting on the ground.

“Eurgh..”

Inside the Maggots cabin, Lightning was watching Sam play on his console before his stomach grumbled.

“Oh, looks like it’s time to refuel!” The jock cheered as he snagged his protein powder from under his pillow and opened the container.

“AHHHHHH!!”

“Dude, sounds like a Shaman warlock cast a screaming spell on you.” Sam remarked.

“Lightning was ROBBED!” He shouted.

“What’d they take? Your weapons or your armour?” Asked the gamer.

“My protein powder!”

“Oh.. yeah, that is totally worth freaking out over.”

The jock picked up his measuring scoop and sniffled, “Scoopy, I will find the monster who did this, Lightning swears it!” He shed a tear.

Scott then walked in, “New guy shows up, protein goes AWOL, do the math.” He crossed his arms.

None of them were very good at math.

Lightning sulked as Chef scooped him his food before he poked it.

“There’s protein in this right?” He pointed to the mean with bacon, a chicken leg, and some questionable ingredients.

Chef snarled at him as Dawn walked up from behind him.

“Your chi is looking shrunken.” She stated.

“Cheap?! Which muscle is looking cheap?!” Asked Lightning flexing his biceps, “Whatever, Lightning does NOT do shrinkage, give me that!” He snatched Dawns tray and gulped down the food.

“Attention campers!” Shouted Chris from the speakers, “Breakfast is cutting into precious time that you could spend getting injured!” He cackled, “Grab your swimsuits and meet me at the dock, pronto, you have ten seconds to leave the mess hall before I release the racoon!” He exclaimed.

“The racoon?!” Asked Anne Maria before they all laughed just as a massive crate dropped with a massive racoon the size of two Lightnings jumping out.

“AHHH!!”

Said Lightning just left the kitchen with even more food in a cart.

“Hey?” He called out, “Where y’all going?” He asked before shrugging, “Oh well, more for Lightning!” He shrugged and dove in, ignoring the massive shadow looming over him.

“What’s the matter with you?!” Asked Jo, “That thing could’ve killed us!”

Chris just laughed, “Nah, only if you got between him and food.” He waved off before humming, “Team rat, looks like you’re still missing a player?” He mentioned before Lightning got thrown out the window by the racoon.

“AUGHHH!!”

“Never mind.”

The screen cut to the contestants in their swimsuits now at the docks near diving equipment.

“All right, here to help us get today’s competition underway, say hello to one of our classic competitors, Bridgette!” Chris announced as he gestured to a red boat rowed by a waving and smiling Dakota and an annoyed Bridgette.

Mike gave an awestruck look to the original contestant as Zoey looked to him and then the blonde confused.

“Let’s get this over with, remember my contract said demonstration only!” The surfer girl pointed out.

“Relax, no demo needed, just throw chum in the water with our intern Dakota and try not to get eaten!”

The fame monger gave her best camera smile trying not to wince at the chums rancid smell, “Haha, what- what is this stuff?” She asked through her teeth.

“Leftovers, from last season.” The host laughed as a shark snapped the boat and nearly Dakotas head off.

The intern hurried over to Bridgettes side just in time gasping.

“So not cool!” The latter cried out.

“Challenge part one!” Chris called the contestants attention back, “Each team must get a pair of water ski’s in an underwater mission or drown trying.” He shrugged.

“One victim- I mean camper, will snag the ski’s in an old-school diving suit and float them to the surface while the rest of their team pumps them oxygen”

“First team to surface their ski’s wins AND gets an advantage in part two!”

“Listen up maggots!” Jo shouted, “I’M DIVING!” She announced.

“Hey-oh!” Anne Maria exclaimed, “What are you sayin’? None of us can do it?” She asked

To prove her own point, Jo dropped the helmet over Camerons head causing him to crash onto the ground from the weight.

“Jo makes a solid point..” He said dizzily.

“Listen to chicken legs, get busy pumping air, and don’t make me use my whistle!” Jo said cockily before realising her whistle was gone, “Alright, who took my whistle?!”

“Men!” Brick called, “And Dawn.” He nodded as Dawn nodded back, “I suggest we draw straws to see who dives!” He said before the backwards divers helmet got shoved on his head.

“Forget the straws doofus, time to prove your loyalty to your new platoon!” Scott grinned.

“Sir yes sir!” Brick saluted clanging his head on the metal, “Ow..”

**Confessional**

“Sir?” Questioned Scott, “What a doofus!” He laughed.

**End Confessional**

“Ready?”

Jo and Brick sneered at each other.

“GO!”

The two dived down and raced to the nearby ski’s very very slowly.

Brick was soon stopped and the cadet looked back to realise it was Fang grabbing the air pump.

“AHHH!!”

Meanwhile, on the docks.

“Tired already soft serve?” Scott asked to Sam struggling to pump air before Lightning got irritated.

“STEP ASIDE!” He shoved Sam into the water, “THIS IS HOW YOU PUMP AIR!” The jock began pumping air at a fast pace.

The mutant shark chased down Brick before a massive pump of air inflated the cadets suit causing Fang to bounce away from him.

“Go Jo! Go Jo!” Cheered Cameron as Anne Maria scowled.

“You BETTER get those ski’s girl!” She shouted as the camera panned to Mike watching Zoey pump the air, the latter didn’t seem to see where he was stepping on.

“Ok, I swear, I don’t know how Vi- I ended up kissing Anne Maria..” She stated, “I don’t even remember most of went on in the cave!” Zoey added much to Mikes confusion.

“Well, this isn’t the first time you’ve forgotten what happened in game, so I believe you but if you don’t actually like me that way, you can just tell me.” He hugged his arms looking away.

“Mike, look, you’re like- the most amazing guy I’ve ever met-“ The redhead started as a blush became present on the boys face, “-And I don’t know how or why I did what I did last week but I’ll do anything to make it up to you.”

“Well, thanks Zoey.” The Indie boy smiled, he was still standing on the air pumps hose.

Underwater, Jo was pulling on the hose asking for air as she was quickly turning blue.

Mike and Zoey were smiling at each other as Anne Maria saw what the former was doing.

“Hey, get off the air hose bozo!” The tanned girl shoved him away as Jo sighed of relief from below.

“Augh, shoot!” Mike tripped and saw his arm from where Anne Maria shoved him, “Is that orange paint?” He asked as Anne Maria gasped in offence.

“Oh no, NOBODY disrespects the tan!” The New Jersey girl shoved Mike to the ground as the two began yelling at each other.

Zoey instinctively covered her ears but the shouting from the two and the other team persisted.

“You two’s fightin’ over me?” Violeta snickered, “Sorry I’m only here for-“

“Yeah Vi!” Anne Maria clung onto the girl, “Gimme some sugar!”

Mikes eyes widened, “Oh.”

**Confessional**

“FYI Zoey, that is NOT how you make it up to someone!” He crossed his arms bitterly.

**Confessional**

“Lil prince goody-goody BETTER step down, Violeta and I are made for each other!” Said Anne Maria still swooning over the girl.

**End Confessionals**

Dawn looked at her teammates as Scott scoffed.

“Ugh, this is taking forever.” He rolled his eyes, “I’ve gotta whittle some- huh?! Wheres my lucky shark tooth?” He said with false shock, “Brick must’ve stole it! Like he stole jocko’s protein and man ladies whistle!”

“Brick couldn’t steal a TV in a riot!” Anne Maria came up to Bricks defence.

“Think about it, that dudes been on both teams, he knows everybody’s best stuff and is taking it to mess with us!”

“As if, there’s no proof that-“ Anne Maria checked her hair, “Hey, where’s my hairbrush?! Oh that is IT! Brick’s gettin’ a beat down!” She cried.

Turns out Brick was already getting a beat down by Fang underwater.

The cadets air hose then broke off causing him to knock into Jo, break off his ski from the rock, and fly into the air.

“TEAM RATS WIN!” Announced Chris to the flabbergasted contestants.

Mike sighed at the beach drawing tarot cards in the sand.

“Don’t worry Mike.” Dawn said from behind him as he flinched away.

“You won’t be lonely forever.” She assured him.

“Oh, hey Dawn, well tell that to Anne Maria and ‘Zoey’ or was it Violeta?” He asked woefully scratching over his sand drawing.

“Zoey likes you a lot.”

“How could you be so sure?”

“It’s all over her aura, when it’s her aura there of course.” Dawn smiled.

“How can you be so- wait, what do you mean when it’s her aura?!” He snapped his head around just to realise she was no longer there.

“Was it something I said?”

**Confessional**

“I don’t know where the show recruited Dawn but she’s sure is..” Mike trailed off, “Don’t get me wrong, she’s nice, we’re both into tarot cards and stuff but, she always disappears and reappears from thin air, I’m not saying she’s a witch, but she might be a wizard?” He said confused.

**End Confessional**

“Rats are the first to grab water skis, their reward? A McClean brand speedboat to use in part two of the challenge!” The host clapped.

The rats cheered.

“And for the maggots-“ A flimsy yellow boat arrived, “-A totally leaky thingy!” He laughed.

The rodents groaned.

“Haha, suckers.” Scott laughed as heaving and huffing was heard from behind him.

“Rat company, you must’ve forgotten me!” Brick huffed.

“Well howdy, STEALER.” Scott pointed.

“Yes sir! We are stealing victory from those maggots!” The cadet saluted.

“Part two of the challenge, a death defying water ski race!” Chris announced, “The goal? Be the first to ring four bells on these four totally harmless buoys!” He said as Dakota and Bridgette rowed close to one.

The buoy then exploded on contact blowing up the girls and the boat.

“RUDE!” Shouted Dakota from the water.

Chris snickered, “Make that three bells!”

Bridgette then landed harshly on the docks.

“See, you totally got to demo the challenge!” He pointed out, “Who will cry for their mommy? And whose cries will be drowned out by explosions?! Find out when we return!” Chris shouted as the surfer girl coughed and hacked.

Chapter Text

“Before the break, the rats got dibs on a sweet speed boat!” Started Chris as Dawn and Lightning fist-bumped, “Meanwhile, the maggots are stuck dodging water mines in a leaky dinghy that couldn’t float in a kiddie pool.” He laughed.

“Sha-burn!”

“Choose three campers to water ski, one to drive, and one to operate your gull cannon!” The host explained.

“Gull cannon?!” Gasped Dawn.

“Yeah, you heard me.” He waved off.

“First person shooter!” Cheered Sam, “Cool.”

“Each team gets three chances to shoot the bell, or the other team, especially the other team.” Encouraged Chris.

“This seagull looks abnormal?” Cameron pointed out. The gulls had fangs, yellows eyes, and a rattlesnake tail.

“That’s not a seagull, these babies are half seagull, half rattlesnake, all with paralyzing venom!” Cackled the sadistic host as Cameron yelped and ran back to his team.

“Whichever team rings the most bells wins!”

“I can drive!” Mike waved his arm up as Jo scoffed.

“Whatever, I’m gunning!”

“I’m tanning!” Quipped Violeta getting shades and a sunhat from no where.

“And I’m watchin’ Vi!” Anne Maria grinned as Mike silently seethed.

The boy walked to the boat before Jo patted him on the shoulder.

“I see your anger and I like it, now use it to drive us all the way to victory!” She instructed as Mike muttered about ‘lying to his face’ and ‘characters’.

“Lightnings drivin’!” The jock exclaimed as he hopped on the wheel and started the engine.

“Shot gun!” Shouted Scott aiming the gun, “Been shootin’ kitchen rats with my pappy since I was six!” He stated as Dawn furrowed her eyebrows at him.

“I guess we’re skiing?” Brick said nervously bringing the girls attention back.

“I’m more of a floater than a skier.” Sam muttered before Chris blew his airhorn.

Lightning gunned it and dragged the three to the lake as Mike drove the boat forward as Anne Maria, Violeta, and Cameron sank to the bottom from the slow pace.

“SHA-ZOOM BABY!” Cheered Lightning, “We got this in the bag, those maggots will NEVER catch up!” He exclaimed to Scott who chuckled shakily.

“Yeah.. great.” He sneered.

When the maggots got to a faster pace, the three rose from the water being chased by Fang.

“DRIVE FASTER!!” Shouted Cameron.

“IT DOESN’T GO ANY FASTER!” The panicked indie boy shouted back.

“I think little prince goody-goody is tryna saber tooth us!” Anne Maria said to Violeta who looked disinterested at their situation.

“You mean sabotage?” Asked Cameron.

“Whatever brainiac.”

“Whatevs.” Violeta yawned, “Don’t worry babe, I got this.” She said before throwing a punch at Fangs nose.

“Oh Vi, you are SO the best!” The tanned girl fanned her face as Fang snarled at them from underwater.

“Let’s see if we can slow down those rats!” Jo aimed her gun to the leading team, “Eat gull losers!”

“Wait, we only have three gulls, we need to save them for the bells!” Mike remarked looking behind him.

“Of course, but we only need to hit two out of three to win!” She shot as Mike ducked.

“AH!” Lightning yelped as the gull Jo shot bit into his back, “Lightnings been hit! Lightnings.. been…” He slurred before passing out.

“Heh, nice.” Muttered Scott which didn’t fall on deaf ears, “WOAH WAIT- LIGHTNING LOOK OUT FOR THE WREATHS!” He yelled as the drove into heaps of them.

“Alright!” Laughed Jo before aiming the gun to their first bell, right before the target got shot from behind her and exploded the buoy.

“Great shot Jo.” Said Mike as Jo scowled.

“That wasn’t me.”

“NICE ONE SCOTT!” Shouted Sam as Brick cheered as well for the farm boys shot.

“Yeah.. woo..” He cheered weakly, “Stupid gun, that should’ve been way off..” He muttered.

“Oh no, we’re losing!” Shouted Anne Maria, “What do we do?!” She asked as Cameron looked at the area thoughtfully.

“We only have two shots left, I’m guessing our best shot is to have someone manually do it themselves, but that would require someone really athle-“

“Leave this to Viktoriya, master of gymnastics!” The lady shouted as she looked for a running start.

Lightning was still shaken as Scott looked to him, “I guess you better pull over.” The latter suggested.

“Hi Dakota!” Shouted Sam from behind him as they passed the girl still hanging from the buoy.

“Hi Sa-“ She got cut off by fang emerging from the water, only to be hit by the bucket held by her.

Lightning knocked his head on the gear shift and lowering it putting their boat to a pause.

“AHHH!!” Dawn, Sam, and Brick all shouted knocking into the boat.

“Viktoriya shall now preform the triple point dismount!” The gymnast exclaimed as she let go of the handles, flipped three times in the air, and hit their bell as she made a quick departure before the explosion could hit her.

“Woahh..” Sam grasped his head dizzily.

“The maggots are ahead!” Yelled Brick.

“And we lost our ski’s!”

“Blame him, he stopped the boat!” Scott pointed to Lightning still fast asleep.

“Wait, I can drive the boat!” Sam raised his hand, “It’ll be just like speed boat runner on my swii!” He added as Sam grumbled about how stupidly useful the gamers knowledge has been the last few challenges.

“And Brick and Lightning should ski.” Dawn quipped as Brick saluted her and helped Lighting up.

“Scott, don’t you dare fire any more of those defenseless gulls.” She pointed to the farm boy.

“Promise.” He drawled before firing a gull, “Starting now.” Said Scott as Dawn scowled at him.

“Let’s drive this thing!” Shouted Sam as Brick and Dawn ski’ed on Lightnings back.

“Look!” Yelled Mike, “The rats are back in the race!” He pointed out.

“Not for long!” Yelled Jo as she loaded the shooter only for it to wheeze, “Wha- this stupid things jammed!” She shouted and hit it causing the machine to blow up in her face.

“Oh my God, are you ok?!” Asked the indie boy as Jo coughed out feathers.

“LOOK OUT!” Shouted Cameron making Mike look forward.

“AHHHH!!” They yelled hitting jagged boulders.

The ‘boat’ got pierced by a rock as Viktoriya and Anne Maria crashed in the water while the rest fumbled on the rocks.

“Ough.. my thoracic vertebrae..” Cameron said weakly.

The maggots then passed them while Dawn looked back.

“Those poor gulls!” She exclaimed at the crash, “This is worse than the class field trip to the chicken nugget factory!” The aura whisper lamented.

“Scott, Sam, theres the last buoy!” Pointed out Brick.

“Sweet, get ready to level up!” Sam noted to a wincing Scott.

**Confessional**

“No way we can win, then it’ll ruin my plan!” The farm boy huffed, “So I gots to be smart, smart like-“ He cut himself off as he poked his eye with his shark tooth.

“OW!”

**End Confessional**

The boy lowered the gun and shot, right on Sam’s back.

“One double frap two sugars…” Sam said dizzily before knocking out.

“SCOTT, GRAB THE WHEEL!” Shouted Brick.

“I can’t, I’m the gunner!” He excused as the boat spun around and around.

“Nice driving beanie boy!” Snarked Jo.

“I’m so sorry guys, but look, the bells right over there!” He pointed ahead of them.

“It’s time to take one for the team string bean!” The blonde shouted.

“And by take one you mean-“ The bubble boy got cut off as Jo flung him to the buoy.

Similarly, Lightning got flung from his team’s boat as they crashed into rocks.

The two crashed into each other and onto the buoy causing it to sink.

Chris looked to the commotion with his binoculars and frowned, “No explosions, not cool.” He grumbled.

Just then, the mine set off causing a big mushroom cloud to fill the air.

“Heheh, nice.”

“Aw yeah!”

“Nice work buddy!”

“Great job dude!”

“You really came through for us bean sprout, well done.” Jo gave a thumbs up to Cameron being pulled away in a stretcher and into an ambulance.

The rats coughed and hacked as they washed up ashore.

“Man.. how did that last gull get me?” Asked Sam as the others gave him small glares.

“Jo had a lucky shot I guess.” Shrugged Scott.

**Confessional**

“Hah!” Scott snickered, “Now that we’re back on our losing streak, I’ve got to choose who I wanna get eliminated.” He said whittling another stick, “So many choices!” He then got a piece of wood in arm.

“OW!”

**Confessional**

“Jo’s gun was jammed, we all saw it!” Dawn exclaimed, “I’ve been noticing a traitorous aura in our team and I think I found them.” She crossed her arms.

“I swear by the great mother earth, I will expose Scott for the traitor he is!”

**End Confessional**

“I say we vote Brick.” Scott said to everyone in the team but Brick, “He’s obviously stealing from everyone.” He noted falsely not catching Dawns scowl aimed towards him.

“We should really find where he hid-“ The farm boy took a seat on Sam’s bed which was strangely lumpy, unlike before, “Huh, what’s this?” He asked with faux confusion before lifting the covers revealing all the stolen items.

Everyone gasped, some less than others.

“Wha- dude how- I-“ Sam stuttered as Scott and Lightning glared at him. Dawn shook her head.

**Confessional**

“Yeah, I stole that stuff.” Shrugged Scott, “I was gonna pin it on Brick but Sam’s been getting too useful to the team for his own good.” He sneered. He needed this losing streak to last as long as he could, nobody was catching onto his plan anyways.?

**End Confessional**

“Guys, I’m being framed!” Sam put his hands up as the maggots glared at him.

“Forget that, I’m givin’ you a beat down!” Shouted Anne Maria before Jo shoved her away.

The blonde used her whistle, “Back off helmet hair, this one’s mine.” She said before stepping up to the gamer.

“Ladies, ladies!” Scott walked up, “This is a rat problem, and we’ll take care of this rat tonight.” He nodded as everyone walked away.

Dawn placed a hand on Sam’s shoulder as he sighed.

The elimination ceremony started as the rats sat down.

“After an episode bursting with betrayal, it’s the rats who have backstabbed the best, following campers are momentarily safe.” Chris grinned.

“Brick.”

“Lightning.”

“And Scott.”

Dawn and Sam stared at the glowing green marshmallow.

“And.. the toxic marshmallow of loserdom goes to….”

“Sam.”

The gamer sighed, “Better than last.” He slumped as he walked to the dock with Chris and Chef.

“Any last words?” Asked Chris.

“WAIT!” Yelled Dakota running up to the catapult.

The host rolled his eyes, “Intern, I told you to clean the bathrooms with a toothpick-“

“Sam, you are like, one of the greatest people on this island.” Dakota put her hands in his, ignoring the host, “Can- can we keep in touch after this stupid game?” She asked.

Sam chuckled scratching the back of his head which was beet red, “Oh- uh, sure!” He smiled as Chef dragged her away.

“Best. Day. Ev-“ He got flung by an annoyed Chris, “-ERRRRRRR!!!” Shouted Sam.

“Don’t you hate happy endings.” Chris rolled his eyes, “Less of that mushy stuff, and more backstabbing and fights, all right here next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.

Chapter Text

“Previously on Total Drama Revenge of The Island, the campers got deep, with an underwater scavenger hunt!” Brick and Jo were seen diving into the water.

“Zoey’s alter Violeta pumped her way into Anne Maria’s heart and under Mikes skin.” The screen showed Violeta and Anne Mari flirting while Mike walked away glumly.

“And just as the two were reuniting, Viktoryia took charge and threw down some gold metal moves in the water skiing challenge!” The gymnast triple flipped in the air and landed on the explosive buoy before retreating just as it set off.

“In the end, Sam was tossed for swiping everybody’s stuff even though it was really Scott, sneaky. But not sneaky enough to not catch the attention of aura reading Dawn!” Dawn was seen glaring at Scott while he sabotaged Sam.

“It’s now team maggot versus team rat, will the rats make it with another rat sabotaging the rest? Let’s hope not, nothing more entertaining than watching this go down, like something else going down!” Chris glanced to a confused Chef right before the planks beneath him gave up causing him to crash into the lake.

“There’s more where that came from, right now on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Shouted the host.
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.
.
.

The camera panned down to the front of the communal bathrooms where Cameron and Mike were standing with the latter pounding on the door.

“Uh, hello? Is it our turn yet?” Asked the bubble boy.

“Ah, keep your panties on, we’re busy here!” Shouted Anne Maria while helping a confused Zoey with her hair.

“I’m serious, I don’t remember what happened in most of the challenge last week!” The redhead looked to both of the girls.

“Yeah, yeah.” Jo rolled her eyes, “I’m sure Mike believes you Zoey, or was it Violeta?” She snickered as Mike made a strained noise outside the bathroom.

The blonde shrugged at the varying glances made her way as she took out an electric razor for her “hair care”

“Men, we must stop those maggots, for we are a strong team of men!” Brick cheered from inside the boys cabin.

“Yeah, team me-“ Lightning was going to continue the cheer before jumping backwards, “Oh- uh, and Creepy Girl!” He pointed to the bug covered girl looking like she was staring into their souls.

“Right, uh, sorry Dawn.” Brick apologised taking two steps back as a centipede crawled closer to his leg.

“It’s ok, I understand you three strive in male dominated areas and are unfamiliar with talking to girls your age besides those related to you.” She nodded her head while the three looked to each other incredulously.

**Confessional**

“I sense my teammates do not feel comfortable around me..” Dawn stated as she pet a cockroach.

“I must prove my worth on this team to last long enough to see Scott’s reign of terror go down.” She concluded balling her fist.

**End Confessional**

“It’s challenge time!” Chris shouted from the speakers, “Campers, meet me on the other side of the island!” He instructed.

“Hey Mike!” Zoey sat down next to said boy who tensed at her arrival, “I like the new pins on your beanie!” She complimented.

“Thanks, I guess that means ‘Violeta’ likes Anne Maria’s new hair accessory?” He said glumly looking at the woodpecker trying to chomp at the tanned girls hair.

“I-“

**Confessional**

“I really thought Zoey was a nice person, but either she’s into me or Anne Maria, she can’t have both!” The indie boy exclaimed in exasperation.

**Confessional**

“My alters are really messing things up with Mike.” Sighed Zoey, “Especially Vi, for having such a specific trigger, she really fronts more than I thought she would!” The girl rubbed the bridge of her nose in annoyance.

**End Confessionals**

The curtains of a shabbily made runways opened as Chris flew down from his jetpack in a fitted suit with white hair in a ponytail and shades.

Chef, who was in his signature sparkly pink dress, took off the jetpack as Chris clasped his hands together.

“Welcome to your challenge, the weird and wild fashion spectacular!” Introduced the host.

“Fashion? Now you’re talkin!” Anne Maria grinned as she sprayed on her twentieth coat of hair spray.

Jo fake-gagged, “Fashion, waste of time.” She rolled her eyes.

“Says the gal wearing mens prison sweats.” The tanned girl scoffed.

The blonde faltered for a second before glaring back, “Hey, nobody needs to be reminded that I’m a girl!” She sneered.

“Wha- who’s a girl?” Asked Lightning before Chris blared his blow horn.

“Zip it!” The host shouted, “You all will be not be walking the catwalk, no, no, no.” He shook his head, “No amount of fashion could help you people so here’s how it’s going to work.”

“Each team get’s a wardrobe with a makeup kit and ten minutes to dress and pick a model which you’ll send down the runway to be judged by myself and Chef AND today’s Total Drama classic competitor, Lindsay!” Chris gestured to a suitcase.

On that note, Lindsay emerged from the case and cheered, “Yay! Don’t you just love my special fashion judgey shoes!” She kicked up her leg to show her brand new gem imbedded blue boots.

“Oh my God!” Mike shook Zoey by the shoulders vigorously, “It’s THE Lindsay!” He exclaimed as the blonde took a bow but lost her balance and face planted on the catwalk.

“Right..” Zoey nodded along.

“But first, you need to catch your model!” Chris said as he picked away lint from his suit.

“Catch a model?” Asked Jo, “Childs play, where are they hiding huh?” She looked around.

“Did I say human models? Don’t think so.” Chris fanned himself, “No, your models are in THERE!” The host pointed to the woods as a creature growled so loudly it shook the entire forest.

“They’re wild, they’re mutated, and like me, despise teenagers!” Laughed Chris, “Okay fashionistas, GO!” He blared his blow horn.

The contestants were looking around the woods either in groups of two or by themselves.

Mike and Anne Maria both looked up and saw Zoey bodyslam a three eyed frog.

The girl cupped the frog before it disappeared and reappeared in the girls hair.

“Huh-“ She got cut off as the frog teleported her and itself in midair.

“AW FUUUU-“ She shouted as she crashed on the ground.

Lightning poked the tail of a giant turtle before it picked him up and started tossing him around like a ragdoll.

“Oww..” He coughed out dirt.

Camerons head popped up from behind a bush as he stared down a beaver.

The boy jumped on the creature and yelled triumphantly before it started lifting him up. He failed to notice the beaver was connected to the head of a massive angler fish.

“AHHH!!” Yelled Jo followed by the bubble boy.

Scott walked up to a slice of pizza surrounded by rope and raised an eyebrow. He saw the rope leading to behind a tree where Fang had an axe in his hand ready to pounce.

The farm boy rolled his eyes, “Man, what great pizza, too bad it has pepperoni.” He sighed walking away as Fang crept up to the pizza and painstakingly took each pepperoni slice.

Scott snickered from behind the tree right as he took out his shark tooth and sliced the rope. Fang yelped as his own trap dragged him up the tree.

“Wow, no pepperoni! Perfect!” Scott exclaimed picking up the pizza from the ground and ate it, dirt and all.

“So..” Zoey muttered from behind a log as massive mutated creatures battled it out from below the cliff team maggots were on, “Which one should we dress up?” She asked.

“I dunno, maybe something that can’t eat us?” Jo responded.

“Five minutes people!” Reminded Chris from the speakers.

“Hey guys!” Shouted Cameron, “How about that slimy maggot, the one thats the size of a beagle.” He pointed as the giant maggot threw up toxic waste, “It’d be a cinch to catch and dress, we could just slide it down the runway!” He offered.

“Killer idea bubble boy!” The blonde patted him on the back.

“Alright, step aside and let me work, this maggots gotta look bangin’!” Anne Maria stepped up.

“Guys, there has to be a way to get one of those critters!” Whispered Scott to Brick and Lightning.

“I can talk to Earl.” Dawn said from behind Scott.

“AUG-“ Scott let out a high pitched scream before pounding his chest, “I mean AHH, and who even is Earl?” He asked to the aura whisperer.

“That’s the name of the Sasquatch.” She pointed to the giant creature entering its cave.

“And who’s gonna dress it up?” Lightning questioned.

“Leave that to me!” Brick pointed to himself.

“Aw yeah, do I got style or what?” Anne Maria proudly pointed to the maggot dressed like a wannabe rapper.

“Or what?” Asked Zoey as the tanned girl glared at her.

“Three minutes remaining!” Shouted Chris.

“We’re running out of time!” Jo yelled.

“I can try to dress the maggot up?” Offered Mike while Anne Maria scoffed.

Chris sipped his drink from his beach chair under an umbrella, “Yo intern, when you’re done taking care of the environment make sure to refill my drink!” He ordered while Dakota rolled a barrel of toxic waste that definitely was not supposed to be touched without a hazmat suit.

Brick suddenly ran up to her, “Hey Dakota!” He waved.

“Oh, uh- hi cement was it?” She waved back.

“It’s Brick.” He stated, “I just need some fashion advice.” The cadet explained brightening Dakotas mood.

“You want my advice?! Nobodies ever asked me for my advice!” She exclaimed.

“Yeah, I just remember Sam talking to me about how well versed you were at fashion.” The boy scratched the back of his head as Dakota’s smile dropped.

“Oh.. Sam.” She said a little wistfully before shaking her head, “I mean, yeah, I can help you!” The fame monger smiled before looking around, “Ok, what I’m about to tell you is top secret, like three seasons ahead secret.” She whispered in his ear.

Brick nodded seeming genuinely interested.

“Stripes, they are SO on trend!” She whispered.

He gasped, “Stripes, of course!” The cadet ran off, “Thank you Dakota!”

Mike adjusted the maggots collar one more time and wiped the dust, and slime, off his hands, “Ok, what do you guys think, be honest, uh unless you hate it.” He looked back.

“Not bad Mike!” Cameron gave a thumbs up.

“Not good either.” Anne Maria scrunched her eyebrows looking away.

“One minute!” Shouted Chris.

“It’s fine, we’re not spending all day on this, let’s get back to Chris.” Jo rebutted.

Meanwhile, the rats, aka just Brick and Dawn, were dressing up Earl with the former giving a big grin as he helped with the finishing touches.

“Wow Brick, you’re amazing at this!” Complimented Dawn looking at the Sasquatches outfit.

The cadet wiped off sweat from his forehead, “Thank you.” He smiled.

“Times up!” Shouted Chris as spotlights began turning on from each direction of the stage.

“It’s freaky forest fashion time, maggot-tiers, show me something fierce!” The host exclaimed, “Chef, drop that needle!” He instructed as Chef started the record player.

Anne Maria gave a disinterested look before the maggot crawled up, “This gorgeous fun sized maggot is showing off a bold retro fashion-like outfit, with it’s new parted hairdo complimenting it’s biker vest and patterned t-shirt.” She said as Mike and Cameron clapped.

“Little gross what with the oozing and squirming, I give it an eight point five!” Announced Chris as the maggots cheered.

Chef gave an eight point zero while Lindsay gave- a one point eight? Protests emerged from the maggots as the blonde looked to her score and realised the problem.

“Oops..” Lindsay flipped the score right-side up and showcased the eight point one.

“Alright, show me what you got rats!” Shouted Chris.

A pause.

“Rats?”

Suddenly, a Sasquatch confidently strutted down the runway in a blue vertical striped shirt with black overalls and shades dramatic enough to rival Chris’s.

“Here, we present Earl the Sasquatch in a low cut striped t-shirt with black and flowy overalls complimented by shades created to match our models unique face?” Lightning read from a card while the judges inspected the outfit.

“Hm, a bit basic but it works!” Chris said raising up an eight point four, “What does-“ He cut himself off, “Intern! You’re supposed to be moving barrels of toxic waste!” He shouted to Dakota clapping as the Sasquatch posed.

Suddenly a hoard of paparazzi arrive taking pictures of Earl as Dakota stopped clapping.

“Wha- hey! You’re supposed to be taking pictures of me?!” She cried as the Sasquatch covered his eyes from the flashing lights getting more and more enraged.

“Well I think the stripes are-“ Lindsay started before the Sasquatch grabbed her by the head, “AHHH!!”

The Sasquatch then flew away with a jetpack and Lindsay in tow.

“Hey, he took my jetpack!” Shouted Chris as Lindsay yelled while Earl flew to boney island. The safest place on earth.

Chris hummed sensing a future lawsuit, “Will Lindsay survive, and am I legally liable if she doesn’t?” He asked, “Find out after the break.”

Chapter Text

“What do you mean I’m liable if the Sasquatch eats Lindsay?!” Cried Chris as he dramatically fanned his face, “Yes, I know I got it shipped here along with the raptors and the-“ He cut himself off looking at the incredulous looks given to him by the campers.

“Gotta go..” The host chuckled nervously before looking at the contestants, “Hey! For our next challenge, the two teams will-“ He faltered for a second, “-Compete to rescue Lindsay!” He exclaimed.

The teens still looked baffled.

“Yep, that’s it, everyone grab a canoe and get to boney island!” Chris instructed as the others ran past, “Yep, it’s all good.”

“Okay, I need you guys to know that we should NOT get anything from that island ok?” Mike stated to his teammates.

“And why is that?” Jo asked raising an eyebrow.

“Well, one of the original contestants snagged something from here and their entire team was cursed with a losing streak for weeks.” He answered tensing as the fog swallowed the two boats whole.

“Right, a ‘curse’”

“LINDSAY!” Shouted Zoey as the contestants ran around the island.

“Where are you?!” Yelled Cameron as Scott grinned.

**Confessional**

“Chris is gonna merge the teams any day now, so it’s time to start working on the maggots.” The farm boy rubbed his chin while thinking

“Zoey’s right for the plucking, and if you asked anybody back home, I’m a great plucker.” He boasted.

**End Confessional**

Scott sighed while walking as Zoey kept running ahead of him. The boy scowled before sighing even louder. Zoey still kept running.

And so the ginger sighed heavily slapping his face while sniffling a bit to really sell it. The redhead stopped to see what Scott was sighing about.

“Uh, are you ok? You sound constipated.” She asked looking confused.

Scott sniffed, “This is all my fault!” He cried.

“You called the paparazzi?!” Gasped Zoey leaving Scott spluttering.

“Wha- no!” He exclaimed before crying again, “My team voted off Sam behind my back, and he’s the only one with the sense of direction to find the Sasquatch!” He lied, “Lindsay’s doomed!” The boy wailed crying on Zoeys shoulder.

Zoey awkwardly patted Scott on the back not knowing how to comfort people, “Uh- there, there.” She said, “We’ll find Lindsay, don’t worry.” The redhead then peeled Scott off her shoulder.

**Confessional**

“I feel bad for Scott.” She shrugged, “It was kind of strange how he was ok with voting off Sam last week and then this, but I still can’t trust my memory at this point.” Zoey said muttering the last bit.

**Confessional**

Scott was laughing maniacally in the stall before a fly got stuck in his throat leaving him coughing and hacking.

**End Confessionals**

“Guys!” Shouted Brick pointing upwards, “The Sasquatch!” He exclaimed pointing to the creature and Lindsay up on a hill near stacked planks.

“Aww, it’s ok Earl, the world just can’t handle beauty like yours!” Lindsay said comfortingly, “You’re a snowflake, but just like a LOT bigger like I mean, a LOT!” She said as the animal wiped his tears.

“What’s with all the scaffolding?” Asked Scott as Chef, Chris, and Dakota walked past.

“I’m turning boney island into my personal resort, health department said it was unfit for human life but I sent in workers anyways!” The host remarked uncaringly, “Hm, wonder where they went.”

The screen flashed to massive beavers gnawing at the last pieces of flesh from human bones.

“Don’t hurt him!” Yelled Lindsay from above, “He just has big hairy body issues!” She exclaimed.

“I hear that..” Muttered Jo rubbing her face self consciously before widening her eyes at the others staring at her, “I- I mean, did you hear that?! He’s got issues!” She yelled, “We gotta take that psycho Earl down!”

“This wouldn’t be needed if the beast wasn’t mad about your stupid outfit.” Scott rolled his eyes at Brick.

**Confessional**

“Fine, I’ll stay away from fashion from now on, happy?!” Brick huffed and crossed his arms before tearing up a little.

**End Confessional**

“RAHHH!!” The Sasquatch roared jumping up and down causing the scaffolding to act as platforms to tread upwards on.

“I can talk to Ea-“ Dawn offered before Lightning skidded up to the team.

“We need to make a three prong play against the big guy, one player on the left, one player on the right, and one straight down the middle.” Lightning strategised.

The aura whisperer gave a small shrug as Brick nodded to her.

“Team men go!” Shouted Scott as the three ran.

“How are we gonna save Lindsay before they do?” Asked Mike.

“Perhaps we need someone prettier than Lindsay to lure Earl away?” Suggested Cameron as Jo instantly turned her head to Anne Maria.

“No way, I got the goods, but there’s zero chance i’m runnin’ up there with these shoes!” The tanned girl shook her head.

Mike was about to offer Zoey to go but Jo shoved her away.

“Maggots, break out the beauty products, I’m going in.” The blonde demanded.

**Confessional**

“I do this ONLY for the good of the team.” Jo stated defensively, “It’s not makeup, it’s war paint!” She flipped her hair.

**End Confessional**

“Go team men, SHA-BAM!” Lightning cheered as he and Brick climbed up the scaffolding pole while Scott ran.

The Sasquatch growled and glanced at the barrels piled up next to him.

“AUGH!”

“OW!

“NOO!!”

They all piled up as the barrels slammed them to the ground. Dawn just sighed before realising this was her chance to prove herself to the team.

The girl booked it as fast as she could, which wasn’t by much, she was used to slow paced activities, and yelped as she narrowly avoided multiple barrels.

“Ok, you’re sure this’ll make me look good right?” Asked Jo to Anne Maria.

“Aw yeah, the only person who could give you a smokin’ hot makeup job like this is me.” The New Jersey girl boasted proudly as she applied highlighter on the girls face.

“Or a circus clown..” Mike said under his breath but Anne Maria caught it and scowled at the boy.

“We have to hurry, Sam’s making use of good time.” Zoey furrowed her brows as she rushed to add on eyeshadow.

“Don’t apply it so roughly it’s gonna smear the eyeliner!” The tanned girl exclaimed now holding lip liner.

“We’re never gonna make it!” Shouted Cameron.

Zoey glanced at Anne Maria still slowly applying the lip liner and grew more frustrated.

“Oh c’mon! We’re not painting the sistine chapel over here it’s just makeup!” Beatrice yelled shoving Anne Maria out of the way, “All you gotta do is paint this and that on and that’s it!” The old lady cried.

“Finally!” Shouted Jo as she shoved Beatrice away.

Anne Maria face palmed as Cameron took two steps back. Brick walked up to see the final product and saluted on instinct before passing out.

“Wow! Now I know what they mean by drop dead knock out!” Jo laughed as she walked past the baffled contestants, “Oh Sasquatch! Your princess is here!” She said mockingly.

“Uh Jo, you might want to-“

“Relax, that stupid beast won’t know what hit him.”

Zoey walked up to Mike and winced at Jo, “Yeesh, what did Anne Maria do to Jo?” She asked.

“Uh, what you both did?” Asked Mike.

Dawn had to jump through another barrel as she made it to the top while her teammates cheered her on, some less than others.

“Wait!” She shouted to the Sasquatch, “I don’t want to hurt you!” The aura whisperer exclaimed as the creature slightly calmed down, “I just want to help you down the-“

“Hey uh- sweet little hairball!” Jo showed up with bright teal eyeshadow, smeared on lipstick, and a drawn on mole, the whole look was very outdated and made her look years older.

“Feel like a- tall glass of gorgeous?” She tried showing off her makeup.

“See, that’s another what not to do!” Pointed Lindsay as she and Earl laughed while Dawn winced like everyone else.

“Hey! What’s so funny you big ape?!” Cried Jo as she balled up her fist to punch the creature.

“Looks like it’s time to go Earl!” Dawn yelped as she and the Sasquatch ran from the pissed off blonde.

The aura whisperer arrived down with Earl as the team cheered. Scott simply frowned as he caught the girl giving him the stink eye.

“Team Rat wins!” Shouted Chris as the maggots sulked.

Give me that!” Jo snatched Lindsays blush compact to look at the mirror, she gasped looking at her makeup. “Just paint this and that on huh?!” The girl shouted to a heavily confused Zoey, “Yo Beatrice, here’s a makeover for you!” Jo threw down a barrel hurling it at Zoey.

“GAH!” She yelped, “WHAT DID I DO?! WHAT DID I DO?!” The redhead shouted dodging the barrels, “SOMEONE HELP!”

Chris just laughed from his jetpack, “As much as I’d like this to go on forever, it’s time to head back to camp, Maggots, you’ve got some voting to do.” He said but all he got in response was a panicked Zoey.

All the contestants were seated at elimination ceremony as Chris brought out the marshmallows.

“Well that was a complete fiasco, Jo, you failed to bring down the Sasquatch like you said you would, and Zoey, what was that makeup choice?!” He asked as the latter was unusually calm.

“One of the rats isn’t going home tonight but it’s not going to be any of the guys, Mike and Cameron, you’re safe.” He stated throwing the marshmallows to the two.

“Phew!” Cameron wiped a sweat off.

“And the next person safe is…”

“Zoey.”

The man threw the marshmallow to the girl who smiled to Mike. The two last girls were agape.

“And the marshmallow of loserdom goes to..”

“Anne Maria.”

“WHAT?!” She cried, “What did I do huh?!” The tanned girl asked to her teammates who shrugged or looked away.

“You fools got the nerve to vote me ou-“ Anne Maria got cut off as Chef dragged her away.

“Thank you Chef, now for something very special, Rats, you’re probably wondering why I asked you to stay at this elimination ceremony, I’ll need a strong volunteer from each team.” He started.

“Right here!” Jo stood up.

“Ditto!” Scott raised from his seat.

“Ok kids, pack your bags!” Chris grinned.

“You’re hurling them too?!” Mike exclaimed.

“Nope, I don’t give people time before they get hurled!” Scoffed Chris, “These two are switching teams!” He answered.

The two swapped seats.

“Hey teammate!” Scott butted arms with Zoey as Mike looked between the two of them.

“Welcome to my team!” Brick gave a hand to Jo.

“No, welcome to MY team.” Jo brought Brick to her face as she crushed his hand.

“Aw yeah! We got a new dude on the team!” Cheered Lightning before Jo poked him in the eyes.

“Get your eyes checked jockstrap!”

“Any last words Anne Maria?” Asked Chris.

“Uh yeah, I’m gonna need a recording of the voting, because there is NO way they chose ME over sweat pants or lanky over there!” She crossed her arms.

“Oh don’t worry, you’ll get the recording, after being sent to loser ville!” The host laughed, “Hit it Chef!”

“AHHHH!!!”

“Hm. How did Anne Maria get voted anyways huh?” Chris asked smirking to the camera as Mike and Zoey yelped when the camera zoomed in to them watching the elimination from behind a tree.

“Who’ll be the next loser hurled?” He questioned, “How much could we humiliate them first? And will Lightning ever learn the difference between guys and girls?”

“What girls?”

“Find out next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of The Island, we saw our players showing off some interesting pieces on the runway!” The screen showed the two creatures walking, or slithering, down the runway.

“We also saw how useless they are when it comes to rescue!” The three rats boys piled on the ground as barrels hit them. “And in a twist of events, Anne Maria got the toss-a-roo! Wonder how that happened!” The screen showed Mike and Zoey ducking from the camera.

“While Scott and Jo got tossed to opposite teams!” The two were seen swapping seats at the campfire.

“Who will thrive and who won’t survive-“ 

“THIS IS THE DEPARTMENT OF ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION, YOU’RE BUSTED MCLEAN!” Yelled a speaker from an incoming helicopter as Chris just groaned in annoyance.

“Aw man, meddling tree huggers!” He shouted as he picked up his walkie-talkie, “Commence operation doomsday, I repeat, operation doomsday, over!” He scowled before putting on his trademark grin.

“What is operation doomsday you ask? Find out right here, right now, on TOTAL DRAMA REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Chris shouted as two more helicopters closed in.
.
.
.
.

Brick grunted as he struggled bench-pressing a log before Lightning laughed cockily.

“Here, let me show you how it’s done!” The jock grabbed the log with one hand and lifted it up, “Think new guy can do this?” He raised an eyebrow as Brick got up.

“Who? Jo?” Asked the cadet.

“Yeah, we men, and Dawn, are gonna be unbeatable, Sha-Bam!” Lightning pumped his fist as Brick looked away.

**Confessional**

The camera was zoomed in the upper half of the confessional as Jo walked in.

“Hey, Chris McLame, guess what?” She asked, “You can make me swap teams but you’ll never break me!”

“After a negotiation with forest elf, she agreed to sleep with her little animals so I get the cabin to myself!” She grinned, “And I can finally work out like the ancient olympians.”

The screen zoomed out to show Jo with just her towel.

“Naked.” The blonde struck a pose.

**End Confessional**

Helicopters circled the island as interns frantically ran the other direction as Jo and Brick with luggages.

“Hey soggy pants, looks like we’re on the same team again!” The blonde called over as Brick kept marching forward.

“Not quite, you’re on my team now, and if you don’t do as I say, you’ll be the next one going home!” He said confidently.

“We’ll see about that, Major Drippy.” Jo snickered before Brick stopped her.

“Three rules! Follow them or you’re gone!” The cadet sneered, “One, never leave a man behind, two, what Brick says goes, and three, NO more nicknames!” He exclaimed, “Like Dampy Pants, or Wetness, or Sir Leaks-a-lot!” The boy crossed his arms.

“Fine, fine, we’ll play it your way Captain Wizz.” Jo smirked as Brick scowled at her.

“Heh, sorry, force of habit.” She shrugged sheepishly.

The two walked in the main lodge as the others stood around.

“Alright, let’s get this disgusting joke we call lunch over with.” Jo looked around.

“We can’t!” Exclaimed Cameron, “Chefs not here and neither is breakfast!” He explained.

“Sorry, Lightning NEEDS meat, m-e- uhhh, e-“ He tried spelling as the others looks concerned on how he’s even still alive, “C’mon, we’ll make our own breakfast!” He walked off.

“There’s no food in the fridge!” Yelled Zoey.

“No food in the cupboard either!” Replied Mike.

“We should check in the walk-in freezer!” Shouted Chef through the open window before running off.

“Hey yeah! The freezer!” Gasped Lightning as he pulled the door open and entered the freezer, “Sha-Boo yeah, meat-sicle!” He exclaimed gnawing at the frozen ham as the others walked in.

Cameron was the last one to arrive right before the fridge shut itself closed. Turns out it was actually a food truck, wonder where the actual fridge went.

“Haha!” Chef grinned opening the small window from the drivers side, “Challenge time suckers!”

“This is highly unorthodox!” Cameron yelped as he swung on a hung up cut of ribs.  

“Where are you taking us?!” Yelled Mike.

“You’ll see.” 

The screen cut to Chef backing up the truck near a cave before dumping out the contestants.

“AHHH!!”

“Good, you’re here, finally.” Scoffed Chris from behind a TV screen, “Todays challenge is to find a golden Chris statue with your team colour in this old abandoned mine, first team back wins!” He explained.

“Sha-done and done, go team dude!” Cheered Lightning as Dawn just sighed while Jo’s eye twitched.

“Are you Sha-blind?!” Cried the blonde as Lightning blinked.

“Oh right!” He scratched his head, “Sorry Dawn, forgot you were there!” The jock looked to his side.

“I was talking about—!” Jo got cut off as a backpack got thrown at her stomach.

“Don’t worry, there are enough packs for everyone!” Chris said as Chef, wearing a hazmat suit, threw down the backpacks.

Cameron yelped trying to pick up the bag.

“What ya put in them? Rocks?” Asked Scott.

“No peeking, those fifty pound bags are purely for your torment and my amusement, enjoy!” The host grinned as the bubble boy checked the pockets.

“Chemical patches?” He cocked his head, “Why would we need to measure our exposer to toxic waste?” The small boy asked.

“No reason, except that I rented the mine out to store hazardous material.” Shrugged Chris as everyone gasped.

“What the hell?!” Cried Zoey, “Are you demented!?” 

“No, which is why I’m in a studio right now!” 

Everyone gasped again.

“Don’t worry, it’s perfect safe in here.” He reassured, “You’ve got thirty minutes, when the badge turns orange you’ve got fifteen minutes left, red is your five minute warning, and if you see a skull with cross bones, we’ll dedicate this episode to you!” The host laughed.

“But NO way is it gonna come to that, I sent Dakota down there for forty minutes saying we’d give her a good word to other TV producers, she’s gonna be fine.. ish.” He waved off.

The screen flashed to the medical tent where a panicked intern ran away.

Dakota was inside strapped down, her bright blonde hair given the Heather Treatment™️, as she yelled threats and swears directed to Chris that could make a sailor blush.

“Can we at least get a hint about where to find the statues?” Asked Dawn sensing a dark energy somewhere in the island.

“Funny story, the statues have gone missing, something must’ve taken em.” Chris glanced away.

“I-is it well lit down there?!” Asked Brick suddenly sweating.

“It’s a mine bro, pitch black all the way, there’s flashlights and fireflies inside, first come first serve.” He answered, “Anywho, times a wasting and so are your healthy blood cells, so go!” 

“Yes! Lightning comes in first!” He cheered, “SHA-BAM!” 

The jocks voice echoed throughout the cave causing boulders to pile on the toxic rats.

“LATER LOSERS!” Scott cackled as he and the mutant maggots ran past them.

“Smooth moves Sha-Dunce!” Sneered Jo.

Scott closed the railing for the makeshift elevator as Cameron gasped.

“We found the flashlights!” He cheered as the elevator started creaking.

“What’s that noi-“ Mike cut himself off as the rusty chains broke loose.

“AHHHH!!”

CRASH

“Is everyone ok?” Asked Mike in the pitch darkness.

“I think so..” Zoey groaned before Cameron flickered on the flashlight pointing to a tunnel.

“Should we try it?” Asked Cameron before the sound of loud squealing and wing flapping came from the other side of the cave.

“That elevator is NOT coming back up.” Muttered Jo kicking a pebble down the hole.

“We can’t lose!” Lightning shouted looking uncharacteristically frightened about something..

“We can shimmy down!” Brick suggested pointing to the pipes leading downwards.

“Leaders first!” Grinned Jo as Brick ran past her.

“Maybe there’s another way arou-“‘Dawn got cut off as Jo chucked a jar of fireflies to Brick making his way down.

“NOO!!” The aura reader yelped trying to catch the fireflies.

“Oh, thanks Jo!” Brick exclaimed catching the jar before realising he was no longer holding the pipes.

“AUGHH!!” 

The cadet hissed in pain as he crashed on the ground only to be knocked over by Lightning, Jo, and Dawn. This caused the boy to let go of the jar.

“Aw man, nice going butterfingers.” Scoffed Lightning.

“Quick! Catch our light source Santa’s Elf!” Jo demanded from Dawn who frowned at the nickname.

“Wait!” Shouted Brick as Dawn called after the fireflies followed by Jo and Lightning.

“Losers wait, we gotta go, try to catch up!” The jock snapped as they ran off.

“Come back!” Shouted Brick looking around nervously.

“I- I am bigger than the dark.” 

“I am better than the dark..”

The few remaining fireflies then flew away causing the cave to get dimmer.

“I am-“

“Lost and alone in the dark!” He shouted stumbling after his teammates.

The maggots huffed as they searched around the cave except ‘Zoey’ who was suspiciously quiet.

“Shoot, the batteries are dying!” Cameron exclaimed trying to tap the dimming flashlight. They were left alone in the dark.

“Ey, don’t worry mate, adventurers always gotta be prepared.” A random voice came out from the darkness.

“Wha- who’s there?!” Shouted Mike as Cameron realised someone nabbed his flashlight.

The sound of rattling could be heard and what was probably the flashlights batteries being swapped.

Suddenly the light flickered on pointing at the smirking redhead who wore a green fedora.

“Zoey, is that you?” Scott asked in fake concern.

The girl chuckled, “Sorry fellas, Zoey ain’t here, but the names Alberta Smith!” The adventurer gave a wink to Mike before trudging along the path.

“They talk like that in Alberta?” The Indie boy asked to Cameron who shrugged.

Alberta aimed her torch to the ground as she swiped some dirt and took a whiff.

“To the right, a tunnel capped out by giant rodent teeth!” Alberta said before looking to the other side, “To the left, mining cart tracks, so we oughta go to the left.” She grinned.

“Well I say we go to the right because it’s the RIGHT way, get it?” Scott chuckled to himself as Zoey and Cameron cringed.

“He’s a sandwich short o’ a picnic that one ey’?” The redhead snickered walking to the left path.

“That’s it little ones, now-“ Dawn felt around the floor for the jar lid before realising they left it, and Brick. “The lid! We left it!” The aura whisperer looked to Jo who rolled her eyes.

“It’s fine, here.” She took the jar and shoved it on Lightnings forehead.

“Hey!” 

“Lookin’ good Light-Source!” She cackled.

“Aha!” Alberta pointed to a mine cart, “These’ll speed things up!” She patted them as dust emitted.

“No way, too dangerous!” Scott argued.

“What? Too much of a wuss ya stupid ginger?” 

“What does my hair have to do with-“

“Mike! Your badge is orange!” Cameron yelled.

“Aw man! I knew i’d probably die on this show but this rots.” Mike frowned as everyone else’s badges turned orange.

“Shotgun, called it!” Cameron dove to the front mine cart.

“I’ll take the caboose!” Shouted Scott with a grin.

“My first time riding the rails!” The bubble boy cheered as Alberta removed the rock stopping the carts.

“WEEEE!!” Cheered Mike.

“I DON’T LIKE IT!” Shouted Cameron.

“You can do this Brick.” The cadet encouraged himself before picking something off the ground, “Oh! A flashlight!” He realised trying to click it on with little to no success.

Just then, loud stomping and animalistic noises could be heard.

“Oh, Jo! You came back!” He sniffed, “Are you wearing perfume? It’s strong but it suites you!”

The flashlight flickered on revealing a giant de-furred rodent who roared at Brick.

“AHHH!!”

“Good thing firefly bites aren’t fatal.” Snickered Jo as they trudged along. “As far as we know.” 

“Don’t worry they aren’t.” Dawn reassured leaving out the part where they can be poisonous.

“Aw man, our badges!” Lightning pointed out, “We’ve only got fifteen minutes to live!” He exclaimed, “Man, this ain’t right, I never kissed a super bowl ring!”

“I haven’t prevented the continuation of deforestation yet!”

“And I’ve never kissed a guy!”

…

Lightning paused and looked to Jo.

“Uh, yeah, it’s cool dude.. Lightning don’t judge!” He patted Jo on the shoulder supportively.

“Alright lads, keep your eyes open and stick together!” Instructed Alberta as the mine carts went downhill.

“Easier said than done!” Quipped Cameron as the girl looked back.

The two carts were now on different paths.

“Crikey! What did I just say?!” She shouted.

The rails split off as Zoey and Camerons cart landed on a ledge with Mike and Scotts railing going a bit further.

“THE TRACK!” Shouted Mike pointing to the drop he and Scott are about to go through.

“AHHHH!!” They yelled hugging each other before a splash was heard.

Chris looked through the screens from the studio.

“Looks like our players are doomed!” He laughed, “Will any of them survive? I have my doubts. But find out for sure when we return with more TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

Mike gasped as he emerged from the water as Scott did the same a moment later.

“W-where’s Zoey and Cameron?” The former asked looking upwards.

“You mean the one who got us in this situation?” He scoffed, “The mine carts were Zoey’s idea!”

“She probably didn’t mean for it to head in this direction!” Mike retaliated.

The two argued back and forth, the noise bouncing around the cave as another set of eyes went unnoticed.

Cameron groaned from the ledge he and Alberta landed on before flicking on the flashlight.

“Zoey!” He gasped looking at the girl, she was on the ground furrowing her brows from the two at the bottom arguing and the hard fall.

Violeta rubbed her forehead looking around, “Now where the hell are we?!” She asked as Cameron recognised her accent.

“Violeta!” He exclaimed as she raised an eyebrow like she was saying ‘Wasn’t it obvious?’. “We have to go and find the others!” The bubble boy explained.

Cameron paused.

“Did you just get a growth spurt right now?” She asked now having to crane her neck up to look at him.

They both looked down the boys legs realising he was standing on a gigantic mole.

“AHHH!!”

Mike and Scott looked for the cause of those screams before feeling a tug on their legs.

“What the-“ Scott gasped as he and Mike got dragged down.

Brick was in a similar predicament running away from a mole. He made several turns gasping for air as the mole was hot on his trail. The boy then crashed face first into a stalagmite.

The mole sniffed him before reeling back in disgust.

“What?” He asked before looking down to where the mole smelled. The cadet grinned and took off his disgusting boot as the mole ran away screeching.

“What’s the matter?!” He asked marching forward, “Can’t take the smell of WAR?!” Brick cried.

Scott and Mike coughed as they woke up now in a room surrounded by giant moles.

A girl with familiar curly red hair grinned as the creatures closed in on them.

“HEY! GET AWAY FROM ME!” The farm boy yelled before the girl sitting on the rock chair clapped thrice.

The moles paused as the girl summersaulted next to them.

“Izzy?!” Yelped Mike flinching backwards as Scott narrowed his eyes at her.

“Nuh uh,” She shook her head, “It’s explosivo to you two!” The girl laughed.

“But you already got a cameo?!” Scott pointed out.

“Yeah, BUT I ran away before they could bring me back to the others at Playa De Losers, been hiding out here with my buddies!” She pointed to the moles as they waved back.

“Wait, all the original cast is back at Playa De Losers right across from this part of the island?!” Mike muttered before shaking his head, “How long have you been down here?”

“Oh, about six days.”

“Oh my God, are you okay?!” He asked looking for signs of radiation.

“OMG, yeah!” Explosivo nodded quickly, “Ever since I dove into a crate of radiation back in the Yukon, I don’t think it can affect me anymore!” She rambled on as the two guys looked to each other.

Lightning, Dawn, and Jo ran through the abandoned cart tracks looking for the statues.

“I wonder what’s taking Brick so long to catch up!” Lightning quipped.

“I can feel he’s doing just fine.” Dawn remarked.

Jo caught up with the both of them, “Fairy princess is right, haven’t you two noticed how large and in charge he’s getting?” She asked.

The two gave her a curious look.

“He doesn’t need us, he can get rid of either of you the first chance he gets!”

Lightning gave a face of recognition, “So you want to make a pact to vote Brick off?” He asked as Jo nodded.

Dawn glanced away, “I’m not sure about th-“

She paused as a mole ran past them screeching like it was in pain.

“HA! How do ya like it when the boots on the other foot?!” Shouted Brick chasing it down with his boot.

The aura whisperer gasped like she felt the animals hurt.

“See, told you two he’s too big for his camo’s.”

Brick then ran up to the three, “Guy’s I’m so glad I found you-“

“Where have you been soldier?! You left your men behind!” Yelled Jo.

“I’ve been engaging the enemies with our secret weapon!”

The girl took one whiff of the ‘secret weapon’ and reeled back in disgust on the verge of passing out.

“Victory is ours!”

Four pairs of mole claws grabbed them by the feet.

“Unless they do that.” Brick muttered before he and the others shrieked.

Mike and Scott looked at the stone table in front of them with a deadpanned expression as Izzy poured them stone cups of radioactive waste.

“So how do we, you know, get out?” The indie boy asked glancing at the moles drinking the ‘tea’.

“Oh, well.” She dragged on, “There’s a reason I haven’t exactly left yet.” Izzy shrugged, “I dunno!”

Scott slammed his hands on the table narrowly avoiding the waste, “WHAT?!”

Cameron hyperventilated on Violetas back, the girl begrudgingly let him on, as they ran around looking for the others.

“Nausea, one of the first signs of chemical exposure..” He said hazily.

“Hang in there twiggy.” The party girl grunted, “Say, ya know where Anne Maria is?” She asked as Cameron instinctually glanced away.

The weird thing was that it was Zoey herself who convinced him and Jo to vote off Anne Maria, something about repaying a favour to Mike.

“She- she got voted out.” He answered as Vi gasped.

“Wait what?!” She asked halting to a stop, “Which one of you bozo’s-“ The girl paused as both of their armlets flickered to red.

“Oh no!” Cameron exclaimed, “We need to find Mike and Scott fast!”

A loud, “WHAT?!” was heard from close by.

“That’s Scott!”

“Well c’mon then!”

Violeta and Cameron shoved boulders and gravel out the way as they made their way through a blocked entrance.

Mike whipped his head around, “Zoey, is that you?!”

A pause.

“It’s me Mike!” She yelled back as the two took down the last boulder.

The pair hugged before four moles stomped in with four rats.

“WOO!! More moles!” Izzy grinned wildly as Cameron shrieked and hid behind Scott. The Izzyphobia was still prominently there.

The mutant maggots flinched back as two moles crept up to them.

“Great, here comes the competition.” Jo scoffed.

“Good, we could use the distraction.” Bricm exclaimed.

“Brick, do NOT torture those creatures anymore!” Yelled Dawn but Brick already threw his last boot off.

“Way to help the enemy.” Jo muttered, “I have to do EVERYTHING myself!” She complained taking off Lightnings ‘hat’ as the moles tried shaking off the fireflies.

The moles finally let the four down as Jo shoved Lightning, “Get the statues!” She demanded.

“I’m on it!” He shouted as he jumped on a mole and onto Izzy’s chair where the two statues were on each armrest.

“SHA-BAM!”

The maggots gasped as the rats cheered.

“Rats, head for the mine carts, what goes in must come out!” Shouted Jo.

“Ohh, that’s how you leave!” Izzy laughed for the hundredth time as she flipped onto the ledge and onto Lightnings head before jumping to the mine carts.

“GAH!” Yelped Lightning as he tripped and dropped the statue.

“If you’re reading this, congrats, you’re not dead yet!” Shouted Chris from the speakers, “Where ever you are, discard your bombs, I mean backpacks, and RUN!” He shouted as Cameron passed out.

“BOMBS?!” Yelled Jo, “Too far McLean, TOO FAR!” She shouted as everyone unstrapped their backpacks.

“GOT IT!” Shouted Zoey from Izzy’s chair with Scott close behind her.

She looked around for Mike and Cameron before realising they were still on the bottom, the pair sluggishly tried making their way to the others but it seemed the toxic waste was working too well.

“MIKE!” She yelled throwing the statue to a grinning Scott, “Hang on, I’m coming!”

“Whoops, butter fingers.” The farm boy flung the statue which somehow landed in Izzy’s hair.?

Brick helped Lightning up as he held the statue in his other hand, “Mission accomplished, move out.”

Meanwhile, Zoey was trying her damndest to shove the giant mole away from her friends which proved harder than she thought.

Brick was about to climb up the cart before realising the trios situation.

“Brick?” Jo said, “BRICK! Forget those rejects, we have to go!” She shouted.

“Zoey!” Yelled Mike as the girl shook more and more.

“I- I can’t hold on for much longer!” She shouted, “And I still need to tell you something, Mike, I have-“ The girl got cut off as a hard object hit the mole by the back of the head knocking both the mole and her down.

“Brick?!” Cameron gasped looking at the cadet holding his team’s now bent statue.

“Never leave a man behind.” The cadet saluted as the statue snapped in half.

The boy dragged the three to the cart before pushing it forward as he jumped on.

“AHHHH!!” They shouted going through the mines.

Meanwhile, Chris and Chef waited outside in hazmat suits.

“Wow, they’re really cutting it close.” Chris said as Chef grunted in agreement.

The cart then quite literally flew out the cave before crashing into a nearby tree. The red statue hit Chris’s foot as he grinned.

“And the Maggots win, again!” He announced.

The team cheered but it was drowned out by Lightnings, “NOOOOO!!”

“All clear?” Asked Chris as Chef gave a nod, “Operation doomsday!” He yelled before clicking a button which set off the bombs in the cave.

“Hey, this wasn’t about the statues?!” Mike exclaimed.

“Sure it was.” The host shrugged, “And as an added bonus, you just helped sealed off the toxic waste forever, and got the feds off my back, it’s a win win for me!” He explained.

“Oh that’s low McLean, even for you.” Jo pointed out.

“Yeah, I just keep getting better, so rats, hope you’re hungry for marshmallows, and before there’s permanent genetic damage!” He snapped his fingers as Chef hosed them down.

“Uhm, Zoey?” Cameron asked as he led the two behind the cabins, “Do you have DID..?” He asked wearily as Zoey gasped.

“What?! Who told you that?!” She asked looking one second away from exploding.

“Sixteen years in a bubble makes you pretty observant, I don’t get why you’d keep it a secret though.” He remarked as Zoey stared a hole into the floor.

“If you’re really not comfortable with telling anyone I won’t but I also brought you here to help me out with something else..” The bubble boy said dropping to a whisper.

“You have to help me out with Scott.. I don’t trust the guy and I think I’m not the only one who doesn’t.” He glanced away.

“I’ll do it.” She said immediately, “But if I found out you told someone-“ The redhead pointed threateningly.

“I won’t!” The boy swore.

Zoey’s glare turned to a smile, “Thank you!” She smiled hugging him tightly.

“H-happy to hel-help.” Cameron choked out.

“The votes are in, who will receive the marshmallow of loserdom and leave the game forever?” Chris asked, “The following players are safe.”

“Jo.”

“And Dawn.”

The two cheered.

“The last one safe is….”

“Lightning!”

“Yes! Sha-“ The jock got cut off as he choked on the marshmallow thrown at him.

“Brick, you’ve been not so honourably discharged, time to leave, DISMISSED!” Chris shouted as Brick narrowly avoided the marshmallow.

“But I was large and in charge?!” He gasped.

“Yeah, saving the enemy, Sha-Traitor!” Lightning said as Dawn frowned at him.

“So long soggy mcgee.” Jo grinned.

“Any last words cadet?” Asked Chris.

“BRICK! Wait!” Shouted Mike.

The boy turned to see Zoey, Mike, and Cameron saluting him to which he returned the gesture.

“Hey, we gotta send off crazy here too so she ain’t gonna hide in the woods again.” Chef sneered dragging the laughing girl to the dock and shoving her to the catapult as well.

“Fine with me.” Chris shrugged as Brick shook his head not wanting to be stranded at sea with the girl.

The host ignored him as he flung the two away with one shrieking and the other cheering the whole way there.

“Maggots, good thing you’re here, meet your new teammate!” He announced.

“NO! DON’T SHOW ME ON THE CAMERA!” Dakota yelled uncharacteristically as the others gasped at her new hairlessdo.

“Join us next time for more danger, treachery, and more hair removal methods on, TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, players went on an impromptu environmental cover up- uh, clean up, and tried not to get a toxic radiation makeover like Dakota!” The screen showed the events of the last challenge.

“We were then introduced to Alberta Smith, the most rugged of the alters yet!” Alberta lead the team through the cave as a reluctant Scott followed along.

“Iz- Explosivo took Mike and Scott to her cave for a toxic tea party.” The redhead poured toxic waste for the two boys who reeled back from the ‘drinks’.

“And Brick overcame his fear of the dark to heroically save his former team!” The cadet was seen slinging Mike and Cameron over his shoulders as he ran for the mine carts, “Which made his former team give him the heave-hurl!” The mutant maggots saluted Brick as he got sent to the hurl of shame.

“Makes you wanna reflect don’t it?” The host asked, “Maybe with a cup of Chris McLean instant coffee.”

He took one sip of the drink before spitting it out in disgust.

“Bitter, better, better than the rest!” Chris exclaimed dumping it in the ocean. “Who will survive, who will wish they didn’t?”

“Find out right now on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”
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All the contestants snored peacefully paying zero mind to the strong smell of salt water and radioactive waste as their ‘beds’ rocked back and forth.

Their slumber was then interrupted by Bricks alarm clock ringing from a buoy.

“GAH!” Multiple contestants shouted as they woke up realising they were in the middle of the ocean.

“Where are we?” Asked Zoey looking around.

“The ocean Sha-Dummy!” Quipped in Lightning from his team’s own raft.

“Chris must’ve sent us ashore while we were asleep!” Mike realised as he turned around and saw the island getting smaller and smaller.

“I don’t even remember anything after dinner.” Scott scratched his head.

“Dinner!” Everyone shouted.

A flashback showed Chef dumping a plate of not-so-al dente spaghetti with questionable meat on it.

“Eww.. what is this?” Cameron asked poking his fork at the ‘food’.

“Spaghetti and turkey balls- er, not those kind of balls, you know what I mean.” Chef shook his head before grinning, “Enjoy your nap, I mean dinner.” He chuckled.

The flashback ended there as Cameron put the pieces together, “Turkey makes you sleepy, so mutant turkey must’ve knocked us out cold, genius!” He explained.

The boy said this just as Lightning passed out again to continue part two of his amazing dream, “Lightning wins the super bowl… yeah!!” He cheered acting like he was hugging someone as Jo scoffed.

“Wakey wakey muscle mouth!” She shouted kicking the boy off the raft.

Dawn winced as a mutant sardine bit the boys ankle underwater.

“AHH!!” He shouted shaking off the sardine before looking around, “Huh- where’d my dad go?!” The jock asked to everyone’s confusion.

“Great..” Scott murmured uncharacteristically frightened, “Now we’re gonna be some stupid sharks dinner.”

“Pfft, sharks aren’t gonna find us in the midst of all this junk.” Zoey waved off as she looked around, “I’m sure we could use some drift wood as paddles.” She theorised as she scrunched her brows like more and more ideas of how to survive here in the middle of nowhere were spewing out her brain.

Dakota, whose hair started sprouting back in some places, poked the girls arm, “Uhh, Zoey?” She asked as the girl put on a cocky grin.

“Well g’day to you sweet cheeks!” Alberta said in her strong accent to Mike who took a few steps back in confusion.

Cameron then shoved the indie boy out the way and whispered a few words into Albertas ear before the redhead tightened her bracelet on her left hand.

“Oh, hey Cameron.” Zoey smiled as Mike spluttered out water.

“Hey!” He shouted to Cameron.

“Heh- sorry Mike!” The bubble boy said sheepishly.

**Confessional**

“I’ve been helping Zoey keep her DID a secret to everyone else as of last week!” Cameron stated bringing out a notepad, “I found out how and when the alters front, their triggers.”

“Whenever she’s in a loud, as Zoey states ‘party-like’, environment, Violeta fronts.”

“Viktoriya fronts whenever she feels like she’s in a situation calling for her athletic prowess.”

“When she feels strong frustration, Beatrice fronts.”

“And we just saw Alberta front in an action-packed environment!” He explained, “Zoey’s given me some pointers of when she fronts but there’s still one thing I don’t know.”

“How she got dissociative identity disorder in the first place.., I know it’s usually a trauma response so I shouldn’t pry on it too much but it still makes you think.”

**Confessional**

Zoey gave a hand out to Mike as he took off his jacket wringing it dry.

“You know, I really like it when Zoey’s the one talking to me best.” He chuckled as Zoey glanced down hoping she wasn’t red.

“Oh- you do?”

“Of course, but it’s really hard to get to know you when it’s barely Zoey talking to me..”

“They’re- I’M, really sorry about that..” She glanced away rubbing her arm.

Dakota then tapped her arm, “Psst, do you have any hair accessories?” She asked pointing to her choppy short hair.

**Confessional**

“Ok.. this is not a look.” Dakota frowned trying to make use of bright red berets, “The only other show that’d take me now is that Dr. Will guy.”

“I guess now my only hope is actually being a good competitor, maybe Zoey will ally with me, she already gave me these barets.”

“Time to start the friend-ing process.. is that what it’s called?” She asked confused.

**End Confessional**

“Morning suckers!” Chris laughed as he and Chef arrived on their jet skis, “How’d you enjoy your spaghetti and turkey-“ The host paused frowning at his note cards.

Dakota was about to throw Zoey’s red beret at the arrogant man before feeling something stiff in her hair.

“Oh, uh- wow!” Zoey remarked looking at the girls hair.

“What?” She asked.

“Green highlights suit you!” The redhead tried reassuring.

“Those look more like horns..” Muttered Dawn as Dakotas eyes widened at their comments.

“GREEN?!” She shouted in a panic.

**Confessional**

“Remarkable!” Shouted Cameron, “All her time in the mines must be showing its side effects now. Hello cover story for bubble theory magazine!” He smiled.

**End Confessional**

“First things first, if any of you are still trying to find that McLean brand invincibility sculpture, you can stop now, somebody’s already found it!” Chris announced as everyone glanced at each other wearily but multiple pairs of eyes stared at Scott specifically.

“And speaking of digging things up, today’s challenge is all about winning the ultimate reward, life itself!”

“Your first challenge is to race to the shore by any means possible, first team there wins a handy reward, last team gets a heinous penalty before you embark on a quest for buried treasure!”

“You’re using us to bury up treasure now?!” Asked Dakota as she rolled her flickering eyes, “Weak.”

“There was treasure here once, but I found it years ago, how’d ya think I bought the island?” Chris rebutted.

“Must’ve been pretty small treasure.” The girl fired back as Zoey barely held in a snicker putting a smile on Dakotas face.

“Hey Dakota, catch!” Chris shouted throwing a compact mirror.

The girls smile wiped off instantly as she looked at her reflection and yelped, “My hair and that shade of green does NOT look cute together!” She kicked the mirror overboard ignoring the horns and one of her eyes turning into another colour.

“I’m gonna KILL YOU McLean!” She threatened as her team held her back saying things like ‘Not now’ and ‘Maybe later’.

“Alright lame brain and lunatic.” Jo grunted as she tore apart their team’s sign and shoved that to Lightning before throwing Dawn some drift wood, “Get rowing!”

“Who made you the boss?!” Lightning argued.

“Hey, if you wanna be captain of our rowing team..” Jo trailed off.

“Lightnings captain of every team!” He yelled, “Let’s do this!”

Meanwhile, the mutant maggots were grabbing anything from the water that could act as paddles as Dakota somehow retrieved a metal bar that didn’t seem like it was for rowing.

“Dakota, you can maim McLean AFTER the challenge.” Zoey patted her arm, “We gotta find some other stuff.” She said as Dakota nodded.

“The maggots are starting to move!” Dawn pointed out as Jo scowled at the other team.

“We gotta get away from that circus group, stroke, stroke, stroke!” Jo yelled at the two.

The guys in team maggot paddled forward as Mike looked back at the girls.

“We could use some help?” He remarked as Dakota hugged Zoey like she was a stuffed animal.

“Uh, there, there?” The girl patted the blondes back.

“SHA-AHHHH!!” Lightning yelled from ahead of them as a giant squid wrapped its tentacles on their raft.

“I WON’T BE SOME CALAMARI’S DINNER!” Jo shouted as she hit Lightnings face repeatedly.

“ITS-“ Dawn got swung back and forth above the two, “NOT HIS FAULT-“ She tried shouting, “HIS WIFE TOOK THE KIDS!” The aura whisperer exclaimed as the squid loosened its grip on the team at that remark.

“There’s a giant squid up ahead!” Yelled Dakota as Mike shushed her.

“Maybe if we’re quiet we could sneak around them.” He said as Zoey nodded in agreement.

A grey fin then swam closer and closer to their raft before Fang emerged from the water eyeing at Scott.

“AHH!!”

“SHARK! SHARK! SHARK!” He shouted as he ran around the raft in circles while Zoey’s eye twitched in annoyance.

“Damn it! That pasty kids gonna get us killed!” Beatrice yelled as Fang jumped from the water.

The team stepped back as Fang snarled at Scott right before Dakota uppercutted the shark.

“Get away from us!” She shouted as Fang flew backwards and knocked the squid into the water.

“SWIM!” Yelled Jo as the team went closer to the sand.

The team cheered for Dakota as Beatrice scowled, “This is all really sweet, so is the golly green giant gonna save us from that?” She pointed to the squid glaring at them.

“Wait!” Cameron exclaimed, “Get as far back as you can!”

“Hey jelly brains, I bet you couldn’t smash me if you tried!”

“CAM NO!” Shouted Mike as Scott shouted about how they’re all gonna die.

The squid raised its spiked tentacle above the boy as everyone besides the Cameron yelled in fear.

The screen then paused as Chris popped up with a squid hat.

“Will Camerons brain outsmart the squids brawn?” He asked, “And what’s up with Dakota? Find out after the break!”

Chapter Text

The squid threw down its spiked tentacle aiming for Cameron but the boy grinned like a mad scientist and jumped to the opposite side of the raft where his team was. The squids tentacle catapulted the team above and over the water crashing them onto land all while the toxic rats looked at them agape.

Mike shook his head from the initial shock and looked around, “Hey, we’re in first place!” He clapped Cameron on the back who just groaned in pain.

“Yay…”

Scott glared at the others, “How am I supposed to vote them off if we never lose!” He muttered punching the sand.

Dakota glared up at the approaching helicopter clenching her fists which sizzled in her rage. The others were quick to calm her down before her anger got worse.

“Chill out Dakota, we won!” Zoey exclaimed as Chris looked down on them, as he always does.

“And because you won, you get these!” The host shouted throwing down a map and compass.

“Sweet!” Cheered Cameron.

“Ohh, look what just washed up!” Pointed the sadist.

Dawn removed rocks from her shoes as she sat on a rock completely dry while Jo scrutinised Lightning per usual.

“I told you to kick harder!”

“And I told you you’re not the boss of me!”

“Put a sports sock in it!” Shouted Chris, “Now, the second part of today’s challenge started off as a practical joke involving Total Drama classic competitor Gwen, but,” He drawled, “It’s turned into more of a rescue mission.”

He turned on the television rolled in by an intern which showed Gwen waking up in a small confined space.

Gwen tried raising her head but hit it on the top of the box.

“What the-“ she looked around, “I’m buried alive?! AGAIN!?”

“CHRIS!!”

“Burying someone alive is seriously dangerous.” Zoey pointed out, “Even by your standards!”

Mike made a ‘ehh’ motion with his hands.

“That’s why we’re using the buddy system, and instead letting last years losers get all the fun, we’ve brought in one of this years duds!” Chris zoomed the camera out to show Sam.

“Sam!” Dakota gasped before looking to Zoey, “Do you think he still likes me?” She looked to her now sharp hands and rough skin.

“Guy ate a whole pot of Chefs spaghetti and turkey balls so he didn’t put up much of a fight!” Cackled Chris as Dakota sneered at the host showing her now sharper teeth with one eye flicking to a bright yellow like of a radioactive waste sign.

Chris and Chef flew the plane higher for their own personal safety.

“Maggots, you’ve got your compass and your map to the general vicinity of the chest to the northern tip of the island, now go!” The host instructed.

The rats tried following along but were stopped by the helicopter blades.

“Not so fast! To the losers go the penalty belt, Chef, lock em in!”

Chef grinned as he locked iron belts with handcuffs chained to them which restricted their hands from moving far from their sides.

Dawn nearly sank into the sand as the other two struggled to stand up right.

“These must weigh a hundred pounds!” Complained Lightning.

“A hundred twenty to be exact.” Chris corrected before sticking a metal detecter on the boys back.

“How is that gonna help us find a wooden chest?!” Asked Jo.

“It’s not, NOW GO GO GO!”

Gwen grunted as she hit her head for the hundredth time as she dialled a number on her phone while cursing the host out.

Chris picked up, “Hello?” He dragged on.

“You’ve gone too far McLean!” She shouted as Chris snickered.

“Seriously, when I get out of here, Courtney’s gonna file twenty lawsuits to you and your shi-“

Chris’s eyes widened as he immediately shut off his phone and chuckled nervously.

The mutant maggots all stopped running as they approached a swamp filled with toxic sludge. They shouted about the smell wanting to turn back as Scott sighed with content.

“Ahh, smells like home.”

“There’s a path around the swamp..” Mike read, “But it’ll take too long.”

“The rats don’t know that.” Scott pointed out as Mike shrugged, gave Zoey the map with a wink, and ran off as the farm boy drew an arrow in the ground before following him.

He vaguely heard the sound of Dakota stomping through the lake with Cameron and Zoey shouting from her arms.

“Psst, Mike!” Scott called as the boy looked behind and cocked his head at him.

“Hm?”

“We’re friends right?”

Mike stopped walking for a second and glanced at the ground, “I guess, why?”

Scott looked around before leaning to Mikes ear, “I just wanted to show this-“ He took out his invincibility statue, “-To you.”

Mike gasped, “You’re letting me see it?!” He exclaimed.

“Of course, I trust you.” Scott said, “Though i’ve started noticing Zoey might not feel the same way.” He said putting a hand on the boys shoulder.

Mike frowned, “Yeah- well,” He said more lightly, “I know she’s allowed to have her secrets, but it’s like she won’t tell me anything, and I think Camerons starting to know more about her than I do..” He lamented.

“Man, you can’t trust anyone nowadays can you.” Scott snickered walking on the path again as Mike stared at the boy and his statue wide-eyed.

Lightning gasped and plugged his nose as the team arrived at the swamp.

“This is the most polluted swamp I’ve ever seen.” Dawn remarked as she scrunched her face up at the sight.

“Well this must be the way, look at the arrow.” Jo pointed.

“No WAY am I going into that stink!” Lightning protested.

“Fine, but whoever gets the treasure first gets ranked team captain!” She yelled as Lightnings face lit up.

“Now that’s a rank I can live with!”

Dawn hitched her breath as she saw footprints leading to the swamp that looked larger than average and were pointed at the end. She hoped Dakota could make it off the island as soon as she could.

Zoey and Cameron were whispering to Mike, who was now on Dakotas shoulder somehow, about Scott who was declined a lift from Dakota as she said “Sorry, I can’t lift anymore people” while eyeing him like he killed her father.

“You seriously don’t see what’s wrong with Scott?” Asked Zoey.

“He’d sell his own mother to get ahead!” Added Cameron as Mike looked to the two suspiciously.

“At least Scott isn’t hiding anything and everything from me..” Mike muttered digging his face in the map as it felt like they were getting higher and higher.

“Uhm, guys.” Dakota said.

The three looked beneath them realising Dakota was standing on a massive alligator.

“AHHH!!”

They jumped off of Dakota as the alligator swam after them.

“We can hide in that tree!” Cameron shouted as they ran as fast as they could.

**Confessional**

“I don’t know whats worse, mutant swamp giants or the fact Mike trusts Scott more than me..” Zoey complained.

“I wish I could tell him but most of my old friends never really stayed for long after they realised I wasn’t ‘normal’” She said making quotation marks with her hands.

‘Zoey’s’ face darkened for a second as she stared at the camera bitterly.

**End Confessional**

Viktoriya flipped from tree branch to tree branch as she swung on loose vines. She bowed like she always did after preforming stunts before looking down to see Mike shout and yelp for the team to help him at the bottom vine.

“Don’t worry!” Dakota shouted, about to reach after her before Zoey jumped in.

“Mike, hold on!” She shouted as Camerons eyes widened.

**Confessional**

“Of course!” He gasped, “Zoey shares nearly nothing in common with her alters, if they front from triggers that relate specifically to only them, it’s only natural for Zoey to do the same.” Cameron realised.

“The others don’t love Mike in the same way Zoey does, so whenever it’s specifically him in danger, she’d want to be the one saving him!”

“Of course, I’d never put Mike in danger to manipulate Zoey into fronting, I mean maybe as a last resort but-“

**End Confessional**

“Oh no, our map!” Dakota gasped holding the soaking wet map that was threatening to rip any moment now.

“What about our compass?!” Cried Scott as Zoey checked her sweatpants pockets.

“None!” She gasped.

“Way to go.” The farm boy crossed his arms.

**Confessional**

“Gotcha!” Scott grinned waving around the compass, “Now to find out the deal with Zoey and bubble boy, Mike’s right, those two are hiding something..”

**End Confessional**

Zoey and Scott shouted at each other with the latter trying to defend herself as the farm boy shouted more and more accusations. All while the toxic rats crept past them.

“-We’re guaranteed to come in last!” Scott shouted as Cameron stepped in.

“Not necessarily, moss grows on the northern side of trees and Chris said our goal is to the north so we need to go THAT way!” Cameron pointed ahead showing a giant array of thorn bushes.

“No way we can go in there!” Mike shouted as Dakota looked at her clawed hands and back at the others.

“HIYAH!” Dakota shouted dramatically as she clawed through the last row of thorns before cheering for herself.

“WOO!!” The team all passed through as they cheered for Dakota as well.

“Look, that way looks just like the one on the map, let’s go!” Scott shouted as Dakota and Mike followed him but Cameron held Zoey back.

“Zoey, you need to tell Mike soon!” The bubble boy exclaimed as the girl cringed.

“Yeah, mhm-“ She nodded, “I’ll get back to you on that in uhh, ten years?”

“OVER HERE!”

Mike, Scott and Dakota began digging in the ground, the latter more frantically than the others.

The toxic rats arrived through the cleared path from the thorn bushes.

“Shoot, the maggots are already digging!” Jo realised as Lightning scowled.

“Nuh uh, we are NOT losing again!” The jock exclaimed about to run to the rats but failed to remember the cuffs as he tried lifting his arms.

“AGH!” He yelped tripping over as the metal detector screeched from behind him.

“What’s your sha-problem?!” He shouted to the device.

“It must’ve found something under-“ Dawn lifted up the rock Lightnings metal detecter was hovering and gasped, “-Two keys!” She exclaimed handing them to Jo.

“The smaller one must be for the belts!” Jo grinned.

The three got their one hundred twenty pound belts off as the looked at the last key.

“Man, this key looks old, like treasure chest old!” Jo said shouting the last words as the ground beneath her shook.

“SOMEBODY GET ME OUT OF HERE!!”

“Winner circle, here I come!”

“Hurry, the rats are here!” Cameron exclaimed from their ditch that was getting hard to climb up from, “How deep did Chris burry them?!”

The rats were busy digging with Lightning using his metal detector as a shovel.

Suddenly, they hit a wooden surface.

“SHA-BOOYAH!” He cheered as Chris and Chef flew over.

“And the rats win!” Chris shouted, “For a change.”

Zoey glared at Scott, “Thought you heard them right here huh?” She said as Dakota jumped out the hole.

“SAM!” She yelled as she clawed through the dirt and released the two from the box.

“Damn you McLean!” Gwen shouted gasping for air as she hugged the ground.

Sam opened his eyes and blinked in surprise, “..Dakota?” He asked looking surprised.

The girls smile dropped a little, “Sam.” She repeated looking worried, “I- I know I look different and stuff but-“

“You look awesome?!” He shouted looking like the happiest boy alive.

“Really?!” Dakota asked as Sam nodded, she looked back at Zoey, Cameron, and Mike smiling at them both with the redhead giving her two big thumbs ups. She then looked up to a disinterested Chris and scowled. The girl looked like she made up her mind.

It was night time as the mutant maggots walked to the elimination ceremony.

Zoey stopped Mike as she cautiously looked to Scott, “Hey, I’ve been talking to the others and even the other team and I think it’s best if we voted off Scott.” She whispered.

“I haven’t chosen who I’m going to vote yet.” Mike rubbed his arm looking away.

Zoey frowned a bit, “Oh.” She said, “Well, just keep it in mind.” The girl said as she walked off crossing her arms.

Scott looked to the two and back at Cameron, “Zoey says she’s real grateful for you helping her with her ‘problem’” He said smugly.

“What problem?”

“Oh you know, when shes always playing different characters and acting like nothings happening-“

“She told you about her DID?!” Cameron gasped.

“Nope, but you just did.” Scott grinned as the shorter slapped a hand over his face.

Cameron felt a pair of eyes glaring a hole at the back of his head, and he felt like it wasn’t Zoeys.

“And you’re sure you like me, it’s not the spaghetti and turkey balls messing with your head?” Dakota asked poking the boys head as he laughed now in the elimination ceremony.

“Of course I do!” He grinned, “You’re the coolest girl I’ve ever seen!” The gamer exclaimed as Dakota turned red.

Chris coughed interrupting the two.

“Okay players, the votes are tallied, and by a narrow margin, tonights loser is none other than-“

Dakota suddenly stood up, “Stop!” She shouted as the others looked at her confused but the girl made sure the cameras were pointed directly at her as she said, “I QUIT!”

“What?!” Zoey cried, “But why?!” She asked.

“I don’t need this stupid show, that’s why!” Dakota huffed, “I don’t need the money or the publicity,” She glared at Chris, “I’ve got the best boyfriend in the world AND a lawsuit to file, I’m going home!” The blonde exclaimed as Chris reeled back at the second threat of a lawsuit today.

Zoey hugged Dakota goodbye before the blonde and Sam sat in the catapult.

“Third time flying off this eh?” Chris asked as Dakota and Sam ignored him as they kissed, really passionately.

“Yeah, the camera doesn’t need to see more of that.” He rolled his eyes as Chef pulled the leaver.

“AHHHHH!!”

“Nice! Two for the price of one.” He laughed, “Come back for even more painful awfulness, next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, our players went on a hunt for buried treasure.”

“Aka, Gwen and Sam!” The screen showed Gwen shouting and banging on the walls of the box underground.

“Cameron tried to help keep Zoey’s DID a secret from Mike, but accidentally spilt the beans to Scott!” Cameron looked agape at Scott as the redhead glared daggers at him from behind.

“Way to keep a secret bubble boy.”

“Dakotas little trip in the toxic waste infested mines took a teeny tiny toll on her.” Dakota gasped at her reflection looking at the green horns sprouting from her head. “But shortly after reuniting with gamer geek, she CHOSE to take the hurl of shame!”

“Who’ll be the next hurl?” Chris asked, “How will we injure them beforehand? Find out the answer to these questions and more right now, right here, on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.
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The campers all exited their cabin hastily as Chris sent out an alarm from the top of the maggots cabin.

“Good morning campers!” He yelled down to the groggy and disoriented teens. “Today, we have a VERY special treat!”

Lightning gasped, “Fantasy football?”

“Music vinyls?” Quipped in Mike.

“Helicopter bear hunt?!” Scott asked.

“Nope, it’s merge day, no more team rat, no more team maggot, from now on it’s every man, woman, and Cameron to themselves!” The host announced to everyone’s surprise.

**Confessional**

“The merge, finally!” Jo grinned, “All that team spirit stuff was really getting annoying, Lightnings been pretty useful though, I might keep him around a while longer.” She looked thoughtfully.

“Just to intimidate the others.”

**End Confessional**

“Chef!” Chris shouted to his walkie-talkie, “Drop it like it’s hot!” He yelled.

The co-host obliged and pushed down a button releasing a massive block of concrete on the maggots cabin.

“AHHH!!” They shouted jumping out the way as the concrete on the cabin.

“What the hell?!” Cried Mike as Chris shrugged.

“I had a bunch left over from building a monument to myself, I call it ‘Mount Chris’more!”

“From now on, you’ll all share one tiny cruddy little cabin!” He laughed.

“But all our stuff was in there?!” Cameron exclaimed.

“Yes, and because I am nice and not heartless, I’ll help you get it out!” Chris said as the others smiled, he took out a pickaxe smaller than his palm and threw it at the teens, “Enjoy!” He yelled leaving on the helicopters ladder.

The former maggots, Dawn, and some interns tried retrieving some items from the corners of the cement brick as Jo and Lightning laughed at them.

“Glad that wasn’t our cabin!” Jo snickered.

“Yeah! Go dudes!” Lightning cheered as he left to lift some weights, aka tree bark.

“Hey Jo!” Cameron walked up to the girl, “Now that the teams are disbanded, if you want some brains to complement your brawn, maybe we can make an arrangement?” He offered as Jo rolled her eyes.

“Nice try chicken legs but I’ve already got my quarterback.” She pointed to Lightning lifting up the tree bark.

“Two hundred and five, six, seven, eight, ten- uh nine, twenty one!” He counted as the two raised an eyebrow.

“C’mon, gimme my clothes back!” Mike grunted in frustration trying to pry open the remains of the roof.

“Hey Mike!” Zoey shouted from below her, “I found an extra pair of Bricks boots if you want em!” She exclaimed throwing the pair at him.

“Aw thanks Zoey, that’s really..” He cut himself off taking notice of the boots stench and passed out right then and there.

“Hold on, I got you!” The redhead yelled with her arms out as the boy crashed onto her.

“Wow this has to be like the hundredth time you’ve saved me huh?” The indie boy laughed as the girl grinned.

**Confessional**

“And I’m not even kidding when I said that, I’d probably be mutated beetle chow by now if Zoey weren’t here!” Mike snickered to himself, “Seriously Zoey if you’re watching this and I haven’t said this already, thank you!” He smiled.

**End Confessional**

“Well lookey here.” Scott smirked from the opposite end of the wrecked cabin near Cameron, “Mike is all over Zoey, oh sorry or was it Viktoriya- or Beatri-“

“Scott!” Cameron whisper-yelled, “Zoey isn’t comfortable with people talking about her DID, she kinda threatened me not to, you can’t say anything please!” He pleaded.

“Relax bubbles, I ain’t a squealer, that’s your job.” He snickered as Cameron looked at him and then Zoey nervously.

**Confessional**

“I am SO bad at keeping secrets!” Cameron yelled to himself, “Zoey looked really angry at me yesterday before the elimination ceremony for blabbing out to Scott, REALLY angry!”

**End Confessional**

“Challenge time!” Chris said as a tv was brought out, “Todays challenge is all about grabbin’ em and taggin’ em, and to show you how it’s done I present to you, Total Dramas favourite juvenile delinquent!”

“Duncan!”

The boy in question was rolled in glaring at Chris with a muzzle attached to his face.

“Duncan owes me some camera time for skipping out on Total Drama World Tour so I saved an extra painful challenge demo just for him, say hi Duncan!”

The punk glanced at the contestants like they weren’t worth his time before his eyes widened as a familiar redhead narrowed her eyes at him.

Mike looked to see where Duncans gaze was at and saw Zoey who just cocked her head curiously.

“E-eat dirt McLean.” The punk said shaking his head a little beforehand.

“Nope, that’s your job!” He laughed, “First up, the smash and grab!”

The screen displayed a new video.

“Hidden somewhere in the mess hall kitchen are six keys to Chefs prize collection of vintage go-carts, some drive like well oiled machines and others, not so much.”

“CHRIS!” Shouted Chef, “Don’t let these clowns drive my carts! They’re gonna smash em!”

“Yes, and car crashed equals ratings!”

“Go time Duncan, Chef let this punk out on a day pass-“ The second Chef untied Duncan he threw down his muzzle and ran for the hills.

“LATER LOSERS!” He cackled loudly.

“Okay.. probably should’ve seen that coming..”

Zoey looked at the running punk in slight confusion before Scott grabbed her by the shoulder.

“HEY!” She shouted one second from decking him in the face.

“I have a deal for you!” He remarked as Zoey glared at him.

“You help me win today’s challenge and I won’t tell Mike the truth about your DID.”

The colour from Zoey’s face left as she looked at him aghast, “That is low.” Was all she had to say.

**Confessional**

‘Zoey’ had some colourful words to say for Scott and Cameron as she furrowed her brows in anger.

“Oh yeah, ‘trust them, they won’t tell anyone’” She said mockingly, “Damn it Zoey!” She kicked the confessional wall.

**End Confessional**

“Players, commence smashing and or grabbing, NOW!” Chris shouted.

Dawn was getting intel from a cockroach in the corner of the wall, “In there? Ohh, mhm.” She nodded along.

Zoey looked around the cabinets as Jo and Lightning checked the pantry.

“Ready new teammate?” She asked as Lightning nodded. They opened the doors revealing nothing there. “Oh well, at least this challenge isn’t dangerou-“

Jo cut herself off as a giant beetle pounced at her from the wall.

“There must be a key down here..” Cameron muttered putting his hand under a table cloth before grabbed peanuts, “Hello increased stamina!” He smiled before trying to grab something else.

“OW!” He shouted as a mice bit his hand.

Scott smashed a teapot on the ground before glancing at Zoey, “Oh Zoey, can you open that closet for me?” He asked.

“Grab it yourself dirt face.” She glared clenching her fists.

“Oh Mike-“ He nearly called out as ‘Zoey’ sighed despondently and opened the closet.

“See, there’s nothing-“ She cut herself off as a giant beetle latched on her face.

“Nope, no keys in there.” Scott said, clearly on a power trip. She then proceeded to snatch the beetle off her face and threw it to the farm boy.

“Oh, I think I got it-“ Mike looked in a bucket before some claws emerged from the bubbles and grabbed his face.

“AHHH!!” He shouted as Zoey ran over to help him.

“Ohh Zoey, shift through this garbage for me!” Scott called over as Beatrice snatched the garbage bag from his hands.

“Why don’t you learn some respect you lil’ brat!” The old lady cried out throwing the bag at his groins.

Mike finally got his head out the bucket before looking to Beatrice who was still hitting the ginger boy.

**Confessional**

“Okay, I know we’re fighting for a million dollars and all, but she seriously ditched me to beat up Scott?” Mike huffed crossing his arms.

**End Confessional**

“Jo, I got one!” Lightning yelled from the top of the shelves, “Go team dude!”

“Hey!”

**Confessional**

“Jockstrap still doesn’t get it, to the boss go the spoils, and I’M the boss ergo he should be spoiling me!” She said frustrated.

“Maybe he’s outlives his usefulness after all.” Jo muttered.

**End Confessional**

“Gimme. That. Key!” Mike shouted shoving a mop into the bucket before a queasy mutated cockroach spit it out for her.

Dawn followed the cockroaches suggestions and grabbed a key from the second pantry, “Thank you!” She waved to the cockroach.

“Yes!” Jo shouted getting a key from the trash can.

Cameron also got a key, after being tussled by a family of mice under the table. “Yay…” He cheered half-heartedly.

Scott cheered for himself getting a key out the broken pots as Zoey grabbed her key.

“Woah, there’s a golden key?” He asked.

“Yeah, found it in the trash can.” She replied.

“Give it to me.”

“What, why?!”

Scott was about to call for Mike again before Zoey begrudgingly handed over the key muttering a few suggestions about where he should shove his key in.

“Pleasure doing blackmail with ya!”

“You let them trash my kitchen?!” Cried Chef as he and Chris walked past the mess hall. “Chris man, do you know how long it’s gonna take to clean up?!”

“Buddy, brother from another mother, relax, it’s cool.” He said nonchalantly, “See, I got you a new mop!” Chris handed it to Chef who sneered and broke the mop in half when he wasn’t looking.

The camera flashed to Chefs go-cart area.

“Welcome to part two of today’s challenge, Grand Chef Auto, you’ve all been given a can of spray paint and a GPS map of the island, your mission?”

“Race your go-cart around the island and be first to graffiti tag three land marks: the rock wall of mount looming disaster, the spooky tree in the haunted forest, and the tippy top of a giant totem pole.”

“Oh, and the go-carts, you’ll have to steal them from Chef!” He pointed to the angered man.

“The first person to completely tag all three landmarks wins immunity AND they get to choose TWO people for elimination!”

“AND GO!”

“Ooo, Chef’s gonna stare us to death!” Jo said mockingly, “Big deal.” She high-fived Lightning.

“Nobody steals my stuff.” Chef glared, “Nobody.” He snapped his fingers as multiple mutated squirrels crawled on the go carts.

“LASER SQUIRRELS!” Dawn gasped as everyone ducked and dodged from the lasers.

Chris smiled from his beach chair, “I truly love it when Chef gets mad, don’t you?” He asked, “Who’ll survive his wrath, find out after the break right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

The contestants yelped as the squirrels chased and zapped them as Lightning and Jo ran straight to a dead end of the track.

Chef followed them, “Game over” he cackled, “You’re coming with me.” The cohost said as the two jocks looked at each other worried.

“They’re clawing at my head!” Cried Mike trying to pry the creatures off as Zoey yelled his name in worry.

“Zoey, cover for me while I grab my go-cart!” Demanded Scott.

“I can’t! I have to help-“ She yelped as Scott picked her up and ran around like she was a human shield.

“Let go of me!” Zoey shouted kicking and drawing her nails in the boys arms.

Meanwhile, Dawn was already nearing her go-cart as she successfully got the squirrels to switch targets, targets being Scott. She looked a little lost on the controls of the cart though.

**Confessional**

“I’ve never drove or been in a vehicle.” The aura whisperer confessed, “I much prefer something more eco-friendly.” She added.

“Mother nature will have to forgive me for this one.”

**End Confessional**

Zoey could hear a distant yelp as Dawn ‘accidentally’ hit Scott with her go-cart. She decided to ignore it and find her own cart.

“Ow- OW!” Shouted Cameron as the squirrels chomped at his limbs, “They’re all over me, and they’re biting on my nuts!” He shouted pulling out his bag of peanuts.

Mike and Cameron stared at each other wide eyed as the creatures were now entranced by the bag of peanuts. It was a silent conversation going along the lines of ‘Bro?’ and ‘Bro.”

“You want them?” The bubble boy asked, “Go fetch!” He threw the bag which landed in Jo’s hood.

“Sha-what?” Lightning looked puzzled before a stampede of squirrels raced towards him, Jo, and Chef. They shouted in panic as the creatures shot after them.

“My first time behind the wheel!” Cheered Cameron before stepping on it, resulting in him crashing into the nearest wired fence.

Scott jumped into the golden car next to where Camerons car was. “Gold key, gold car? A recipe for success.” He grinned before starting the engine. It didn’t move.

“Heh?” He asked before looking down at the wheels realising there were two slabs of concrete where his wheels should’ve been. “Hey, no fair!”

Zoey doubled over laughing at the ginger, “Suck it dirt face!” She shouted about to leave him in the dust before Scott demanded he get his key back.

“Woah, not so fast!” Chris stopped the farm boy, “No take backs on carts, especially the crummier ones.”

Zoey smirked but Scott devised a new plan.

“Drive me to the finish line.” He said as she scowled gripping onto the steering wheel.

“Move it slowpoke, quicker!” He shouted as he poked the girls back with a stick.

“Agh!” The redhead jolted as she started driving, “What the hell?!” She cried.

The weight of the second car was taking a clear tole on Zoeys car as her eyes widened at Mike zooming past the two.

“You can’t do this to us!” Jo shouted as she shook the bars of Chefs makeshift jail cell.

“Yeah, Lightning can’t be caged!” The jock added.

“Tell it to your prison guard.” Chef sneered pointing to a chained down Fang trying to claw at the two.

Jo and Lightning looked agape as Chef cackled and left.

“First landmark, and first to tag it!” Mike whooped as he spray painted an eyeball on the rocks, “Immunity, here I come!”

“Nice one Mike!” Cheered Cameron as he ran to the rocks while the indie boy wished him luck. “Hm.. what to tag..” He hummed before getting a strike of genius.

Dawn arrived next with her beaten up car, she looked at her yellow spray paint and grimaced.

“Hello Cameron.” She said calmly before looking a little bewildered at the boys marking. Dawn decided not to comment on it and sprayed a leaf and left. Just before crashing into another tree and apologising profusely.

Zoey and Scott then arrived.

“You wait here, I’m tagging first.” The farm boy stated as the girl looked tempted to run him over the second time.

He ran over and spray painted an X mark as Zoey ran to the rocks next and painted a six symbol.

“Oh wow, that’s great Cameron!” She remarked, “But you don’t have to-“ The girl got cut off by Scott beeping his car horn.

“You- you don’t have to-“ He kept beeping. Luckily the beep covered up Zoey’s first statement that left Cameron agape, “-Alright i’m coming!” She shouted.

“Way to go jock strap.” Scoffed Jo as they leaned on opposite ends of the cell.

“Do NOT disrespect the Lightning!” He argued back as Jo blew her whistle loudly.

“Zip it!” She shouted, “What we need is a play, can you bend these bars?”

“Like straws, what about the shark?”

“..Leave pinface to me.”

Lightning then began to attempt to bend the bars.

“Two down!” Mike hopped of the trees branch before driving away just as Dawn arrived, tried to make the mark on the tree as small as possible and left.

Scott and Zoey then arrived, “Oh Zoey!” He dragged on.

“Go make sure it’s safe.” He said right before an octopus tentacle grabbed Zoey and started beating her up.

“Best blackmail ever!”

Lightning proudly opened the bars of the cell as Jo grinned widely.

“Now time to deal with the shark.” She said as she pushed the jock at the shark.

“AHHH!!”

“Nice knowing you shark bait!” Jo laughed as she started her car, “Drivers ed, don’t fail me now!” It did in fact fail her now.

“Did Jo leave me behind, on purpose?!” Lightning exclaimed in surprise as Fang kept chomping on his arm, “I have to catch up so I can catch his lying face!”

The boy tried running as Fang kept chewing.

“Quit chewin’ my arm man!” He shouted as Fang kept chewing, “I’ll take you to Scott?” He offered.

“GO TEAM LIGHTNING!” The jock shouted as Fang drove the car for him. He brought out his GPS and stared in confusion.

The screen glitched as Chris’s off-coloured face appeared, “A-added new dest-destination because f-four wasn’t tough en-ough-“ It glitched in and out as a new dot appeared, “McLean out-“

Chef cackled from the mess hall as he stopped the voice tape and dropped the McLean doll dummy from season two.

“Nobody touches my stuff, NOBODY!”

Cameron patted himself on the back as he finished his mark, a parody picture of “The Creation of Adam” where Chris was seen handing Cameron the million dollars. “Magnifico!”

Jo then arrived pausing the breaks every two seconds, she jumped out and crossed out Camerons face. “Why are you still here bubble head, it’s a race not art school!” She snickered leaving.

“Just-“ Mike heaved, “-Gotta get to the top!” He exhaled as he climbed to the top of the totem pole. He paused as Zoey and Scott arrived, Dawn had some complications getting up the mountain.

“Zoey, give me a boost.” Demanded the farm boy as she sighed and put her hands out for him to climb on.

“Scott!” Shouted Mike, “Stop making Zoey do everything for you!” He yelled.

“I’m-“ Scott smushed his shoe on the girls face, “-Doing great!” She shouted back.

The indie boy frowned as he marked the top of the totem before Scott tossed his spray paint at the boy.

“AHH!!” He shouted hanging off the wings of the totem.

“MIKE!” Zoey shouted as Scott cleared his throat and started yelling too right as he jumped off the totem and knocked Zoey over.

Violeta rubbed her head and looked to Scott and then the dangling Mike. She stood up and looked at Scott quizzically, “What’s red doin’ up there?” She asked.

“Just payback for voting off Anne Maria.” He shrugged as the girl grinned.

“I like your style!” She slapped his shoulder causing him to wince, “Let’s get outta here!”

“Zoey?!” Mike yelled as he struggled moving off the wing. Violeta drove away with Scott.

“AGH!” He shouted as the totem shook causing him to lose his grip and fall to the ground.

“Are you ok?!” Dawn cried jumping out her car which hit the totem.

Jo continued driving confidentially and breaking every second before sniffing the air, “Oh wow, if I didn’t know any better I would’ve thought that smelled like-“ She looked back in surprise, “TESTOSTERONE!” The blonde shouted as Lightning drove past with Fang.

“Take THAT coach, SHA-BAM!” He laughed clapping Fang on the fin.

Mike grumbled incoherently as he went to his car and Dawn finished painting her symbol and arrived back to the ground. Cameron arrived next.

“Hey Mike, hey Dawn!” He waved.

“Hi Cameron.” She waved as he yelped at her suddenly being at his shoulder.

“Can’t talk right now.” Mike huffed as he entered his car, “Gotta get to the last landmark with Scott and Zoey, or was it Violeta?” He asked scrunching his brows, “Whatever.”

“Violeta?!” Exclaimed Cameron, “Oh no!” He yelled as Dawn shook her head sadly and left.

**Confessional**

“I was so busy going solo I forgot about Zoey!” Cameron gasped, “Being a good friend is harder than it looks..”

**End Confessional**

Lightning grunted as he climbed up the totem pole. Chris and Chef arrived in the formers jeep.

“And the winner of the Grand Chef Auto is!-“ Chris was about to announce before he looked around confused. “Where is everyone?” He asked.

“Going for that last landmark.” Lightning responded jumping back in the car, “The extra one that you added.” He drove off.

“What last landmark?” He asked as Chef glanced away. The host picked up the GPS and saw right where the contestants were headed, “MOUNT CHRISMORE?!”

“DUNCAN!” He instantly blamed as Chef sighed of relief, “We have to stop this challenge with extreme prejudice!” He shouted as Chef stepped on the gas.

Violeta looked around confused as they arrived at Mount Chrismore, “This ain’t the place where they put the eliminated folks?” She squinted.

“Oops, must’ve gotten it wrong.” Scott snickered raising up a metal pipe from the car and slamming it on her head.

“Zoey!” Mike shouted frustratedly as he arrived on the monument, “I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing or if you think this is funny but-“ He cut himself off as he gaped at the knocked out girl and back at Scott. Dawn and Cameron were approaching quickly.

The girl grumbled as she talked with her alters. Mike was very confused on what he was hearing.

“He tricked me?!” Violeta asked.

“Men.” Alberta scoffed as Beatrice went off on a tangent about boys in her time.

“I say we let the little one beat up that boy.” Viktoriya replied.

“The little one?” Another grumbled.

“Ay’ mate, you’re barely past my shoulder!” Alberta laughed before being hit on the shoulder.

“Why is Zoey hitting herself?!” Mike stepped back even more confused. Dawn was currently doing everything in her power to stop Scott from marking the statue as Cameron looked worried.

“It’s all the alters talking to each other-“ He responded before slapping his mouth shut again.

“Alters?”

“What is wrong with me?!” The bubble boy hit his own head.

“Zoey?!” Shouted Mike as the redhead paused, and so did the others.

She grasped onto her bracelet and started breathing more evenly as she stood up. “Hey Mike.” The girl said, voice a little strained.

**Confessional**

“Should we tell him?” Zoey crossed her legs and sighed not wanting to keep a facade any longer. She’d be damned if she cared about what the other had to say.

**End Confessional**

“Mike, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I have-“

“DID, I know now.” Mike glanced down feeling a little stupid, “Cameron told me..”

“Sorry!” Shouted the bubble boy as he helped Dawn wrestle Scott.

“I just didn’t want you to think of me any differently, Violeta might like Anne Maria, and Alberta may have a husband-“

“Wait what?”

“But I really like YOU, a lot, I’m so sorry for keeping this away, I get it if you don’t wanna-“

Mike hugged the girl putting his head on the crook of her neck.

“I really like you too Zoey.” He said after a few seconds, “I would never leave such an awesome girl just because your alters don’t feel the same. I’m not in love with them, I’m in love with you and thats what matters.”

Zoey hugged him back letting out a sigh of relief like a dozen weights were off her shoulders.

“HA!” Scott cheered as he successfully got Cameron and Dawn off crossing out Chris’s massive face.

“I win!” He cheered before a yell was heard in the distance.

“SHA-BAM!” Lightning yelled pointing Fang downwards right at Scott.

“AHHH!!”

Chris looked past the scene of two passed out teens, two of them hugging and crying, and one being beaten up by a shark while the other laughed, he ignored all this and looked up at his statue horrified.

His shouts of bloody murder could be heard all the way from Playa Del Losers where the first generation and the eliminated teens looked up confused.

“I- I WIN!” Scott shouted as he ran away from Fang, “I choose Zoey and-“

Jo was aghast to see she was last as she drove up.

“Sorry dude no win for you.”

“WHAT?!”

“You fell for an obvious prank by Duncan!” Chris responded as said punk emerged from a cluster of rocks.

“Sorry bro, that wasn’t me.” Duncan shrugged before clicking a remote as the statue of Chris got a ‘mind blowing experience’

Chef laughed at the remains of the exploded statue as Duncan ran away laughing.

The camera cut to the elimination ceremony.

“The real, final landmark was the totem pole, so immunity and the sole vote goes to the person who completely tagged it, Mike.” Chris announced.

The boy stood up and cheered.

“Mike, eliminate the people you want to go, make one of them Lightning.” He said whispering the last part.

“NO! PICK JO, HE’S THE RAT!” The jock argued.

Mike cocked his head, “I pick Jo-“ Lightning cheered as Jo was about to strangle the two, “-And Scott.” He said, feeling like he forgot something.

“WHAT?!” Shouted Jo as Lightning cheered.

“You heard the boy you two-“

“Wait!” Scott stopped them, “I have the invincibility statue!” He brought the object out.

**Confessional**

“Of course!” Mike slapped his face, “How did I forget?!”

**End Confessional**

“S-so do I pick a new person or-“ Mike looked nervously as Chris stopped him.

“Nope!” Chris said, “To make it interesting, how about we let the one with the immunity idol make the final vote?”

“Excuse me?!” Zoey stood up.

“How is that fair?!” Asked Mike.

“It’s not!” The host laughed at their faces.

“Oh well..” Scott said grinning, “I guess if I have to- Zoey.” He instantly said.

Mike, Cameron, and Dawn gasped as Zoey looked agape.

“You heard it gals, the toxic marshmallows of loserdom are yours to keep!”

Jo went first cursing out Lightning, “-And! I’m a GIRL!” She shouted as Lightning looked surprised.

“You’re a WHAT?!”

“A GIR- AHHHHH!!” She got cut off as Chef flung her away.

Zoey slumped her shoulders as she was dragged to the catapult next.

“It was nice knowing ya Zoey, and everyone else!” Chris laughed as Mike ran up to her.

“Promise you’ll call after the show?” He asked as Zoey nodded.

“Here, something to remember me by.” She said unclasping the golden bracelet she’s been tugging on the last few episodes. It had her and the other alters initials engraved on them, and one L which Mike didn’t know what meant.

She put it in his hands and pushed it to his chest.

“It’s beautiful..” He said putting it on his own left wrist.

“Can I have a goodbye kiss?” She asked smiling as Mike leaned in.

Right before Chef pulled the leaver.

“No you don’t!” Chris laughed, “Who will be the next loser hurled, what humiliating challenges lie in store, and where will I build my next monument to me?”

“Find out next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

“Eurghh..” Cameron groaned as he and the other campers got dragged to the mess hall. Contrary to the bubble boy, Mike practically skipped his way to the benches.

“Dude, there’s five campers left, don’t you know what that means?” The indie boy shook Cameron by the shoulders as Lightning arrived.

“Only five campers left to send home for my million bucks?” He quipped in boastfully as Dawn glanced at him confused.

“You mean four? You’re part of the five campers left..” She remarked as the jock looked even more confused.

Scott pushed the two out of the way scoffing, “Why are we even here in the first place, our challenge is in four days.” He said. A TV then got wheeled in by Chef as Chris emerged from behind the kitchen counter.

“It’s time for-“

“Video messages from home!” Mike cut the host off before sinking into his seat at Chris’s heated glare, “Sorry.” He mumbled sheepishly.

“Yeah.” Chris said halfheartedly, “What he said.” He jumped over the counter and ran up to the TV, “Roll the tapes!”

“And now for a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home to Cameron!”

The camera cut to a lady with an afro, a purple dress, and clunky glasses that were similar to her sons. She waved before sitting down on a light green sofa.

“Camie Bear!” She said excitedly, “I am so proud of how well you’re doing on that show, I was a bit nervous at first but you’ve been so brave!” Camerons mom started.

“You even made actual human friends, that aren’t the pictures of your textbooks.” She sniffled, “I’m sure your father would be proud, though I do hope you win.” The lady glanced away for a second.

“Keeping your bubble inflated is very expensive.” She laughed rubbing her arm as the camera stopped there.

“This has been a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home!”

Cameron smiled at the video as Mike put his hand on his shoulder supportively. The bubble boy blinked for a few seconds.

“Wait, my bubble might be deflated?!”

Chris shrugged, “Probably.”

“And now for a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home to Dawn!”

The camera opened to a couple sitting in what looked to be a couch inside a camper van.

“Dawn!” The husband smiled a little too forcefully as a ruckus could be heard in the background. The lady glared at the people off camera as the noise died down.

“How come you never told us AND our audience about going on a reality TV show, we haven’t heard from you in months!” She laughed.

The couple paused for a second.

“Oh! And your siblings, can’t forget about them!” He remarked, clearly forgetting them as well.

The lady nodded, “Janice, Bianca, Timmy, Em, and Damien all miss you, so do the dogs.”

“The camper van hasn’t been the same since then.” He sighed.

“Mom, can I sleep on a bed instead of the couch today?” A boy off camera asked.

“Timmy!” She shouted.

“This has been a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home!”

“Hey, I think I sha-saw those dude on my phone before!” Lightning remarked.

Dawn slunk her shoulders miserably as Chris winced.

“Yeesh, seven people and some animals in a single vans gonna get more lawsuits than I have.” He said.

“And now for a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home to Mike!”

The camera cut to a boy and girl sitting on a leather couch with multiple vinyls hung up behind them. The latter looked younger than Mike while the former looked a few years older.

“Hey lil bro!” The boy waved as the younger looked at him offended.

“You said I could do the first part!” She wailed standing up on the couch.

The boy got her to sit down, “Sorry Mindy, you can do the next part.” He said calmly, looking like he’d deescalated situations like this all the time.

“Hi Mike! Everyone at school saw you get a girlfriend, it was so gross!” Mindy yelled as the older looked caught off guard.

“Mindy you can’t just say that!”

“What! It’s true, I didn’t wanna go to school this week being bombarded with people talking about my brother and his girlfriend!”

He sighed, “Yeah, yeah. Congrats on making it this far man.” He looked back at the camera.

“Also we got a call from some old lunch lady saying if you hurt her daughter she’s gonna slap your bitc-“

“Ok, I think that’s good!”

“This has been a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home!”

Mike didn’t know whether to feel happy or to run back to the cabin and burry his head in his pillow when the tape ended. He was leaning towards the latter.

“Damn it, don’t children know how much censorship costs these days?!” The host complained.

“And now for a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home to Scott!”

The camera opened to a couple wearing very, very, stereotypical Southerner clothing next to a girl who was presumably Scotts sister. They were nearby some stables.

“Gonna be honest son, yer pappy didn’t expect you to make it this far.” He shook his cane expressively.

The lady scoffed, “Of course he was going to make it this far, learnt from the best.” She pointed to herself proudly.

“What’d he learn from you woman, how to grind wheat?” He huffed as his wife’s eye twitched.

Scott’s sister grabbed the camera nonchalantly as turned it towards her as screaming could be heard in the background.

The girl glanced at the ground like she didn’t know what to say to the camera, or her brother.

“Er- Win? I guess.” She muttered uncaringly before looking for an off switch.

“This has been a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home!”

Scott rolled his eyes, “This video thing is stupid.” Was all he had to say as the others looked away uncomfortably.

“This video thing is stupidly good at getting high ratings, is what I think you mean to say.” Chris remarked.

“And now for a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home to Lightning!”

A man in a suit confidently strolled out the back of a studio set and into the open where news reporters and paparazzi were waiting.

“Son, I’m sha-hundred percent sure you’ll win the million bucks.” He said proudly, “Nobody in the competition has a chance against you!”

“Sir, who do you think has the best chance against your son in the finale?” Asked a reporter.

“None of the remaining ones that’s for sure, If I had to say, it’d be that Jo guy but my son was smart enough to get him eliminated by now.” He answered.

“Sir, what would you and your son do with the money?” Asked another reporter.

He paused, “I’d probably keep it with me for safe keepings.”

The crowd muttered amongst themselves.

“But, what if he doesn’t win?”

The athletes face dropped as he looked to the camera grimly.

“This has been a Total Drama Revenge of the Island video message from home!”

“Pops, what does that mean?!” Lightning asked running up to the TV, “WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!?” He shook the screen as Chef pulled the shellshocked boy away from the TV.

“That was.. better than last year?” Chris said.

Chapter Text

“Last time on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, competitors went on a smash and grab graffiti race!” The screen showed the contestants searching for the keys.

“Lightning and Jo’s team fell apart after she used him as shark bait!” Jo was seen pushing Lightning at Fang.

“Scott blackmailed Zoey by threatening to tell Mike about her DID, eesh dude.” Beatrice was seen slamming a trash bag right at Scott.

“In the end, Zoey chose to trust Mike and tell him, right before being voted off the island with Jo!”

“Too bad, so sad.”

Chris glanced at the miserable interns wiping the catapult, “Missed a spot.” He pointed out as the interns frowned even more.

“Now we’re down to our final five competitors, and you’ll never guess who’s next to ride the hurl of shame.” He turned around and gave Chef a thumbs up as the cohost pulled the leaver down.

“AHHH!!” Shouted an intern as Chris doubled over laughing, “Told ya.” He smirked as the second intern scowled at him, “What? Catapults are expensive, I need to get my moneys worth before someone else will get flung when the day is over.”

“Find out who, right here on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.
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Scott huffed and puffed as he dashed through the forest trying to get Fang off his trail. It wasn’t working. He ran for a while longer before tripping on a rock and face planting on the ground. Fang jumped right behind him.

“You win!” He shouted, “Just eat me fast ok?!” The ginger yelled getting a salt shaker and throwing it over himself. Which on his terms must’ve been pretty spicy seasoning.

The two looked up confused as a shadow overcast them. Scott saw this as an opportunity, which meant kicking Fang where it hurt. Fang knelt over wincing as Scott stood up triumphantly.

“How does THAT taste?!” He snickered running to the other contestants.

“Woahh..” They all said looking at a massive blimp with Chris’s face on it.

“Hah, look at you wusses, it’s just a stupid blimp-“ He got cut off as a massive anchor smushed his foot. “OWW!!”

“Actually,” Cameron pushed his glasses up, “I believe it’s a zeppelin, named after Ferdinand von Zeppelin who-“ He too got cut off as a massive metal platform crashed onto him.

“You’re both wrong!” Chris announced from the blimp, “It’s the McLean mobile air command center, where I will recline in luxury as you compete in today’s challenge, an arial obstacle course!” He announced.

“Lightning taking to the skies, Sha-Bam!” The jock cheered before accidentally punching Scott square in the face.

“Uh huh, AND here to demonstrate, put your hands together for Total Drama classic contender, Heather!”

The mean girl stepped in front of the entrance of the blimp with a fresh scowl on her face. Her hair looked to be a similar length as of last year’s season surprisingly.

Varying looks came from the contestants as they sidestepped out her way.

“Oww..” Cameron muttered as she stepped down the platform he was crushed under.

“Oh my God, you’re THE Heather?” Mike asked looking agape.

Heather spared a glance at the boy before looking back at more important things, like her nails, “Did you not pay attention the first time my name was called moron?” She asked as the boy rubbed his arm sheepishly.

“Heather will now demonstrate the arial challenge while wearing a jetpack.” Chris announced as Chef dropped one on her back and pressed the on button.

“AHHH!!” She shouted as the jetpack flew her through multiple rings of fire twice and looked aghast as the jetpack started breaking.

“Everyone just be cool.” Chris instructed, “There’s a parachute built into it.” He said as Heather crashed on the ground and then the parachute opened.

“Eurgh..”

Chris cackled, “Best challenge ever!”

Dawn poked the parachute draped over Heather and the jetpack wearily, “This challenge is very unsafe..” She muttered.

“Nope, it’s TOTALLY unsafe, did I mention you’ll also be attacked by mutant fire breathing goats?” Asked the host.

“Nope, nope.” Mike shook his head, “I’m out!”

“Okay.. but before you go, you should say goodbye to THIS!” Chris grabbed a briefcase and opened it to reveal the million dollar prize.

“Money..” Mike said suddenly very interested in the challenge, “Removes all common sense and fear of danger..”

“Too bad you’ll never win it-“ Scott said before being shoved to the ground by the indie boy.

“Watch me!” He shouted before dropping his shoulders, “I mean, if you’re ok with it and all-“ He laughed.

**Confessional**

“I don’t know how I ever thought Scott of all people was trustworthy!” Mike exclaimed furrowing his brows, “Just being around him makes my blood boil, and besides, he voted Zoey off, he needs to pay!” The brunette pounded his hand on his fist scowling.

**End Confessional**

“To preform your arial feats, you’ll first have to construct your very own flying machines!” Explained Chris.

“Psst Cam-“ Scott tried leaning towards the boy who side stepped and caused him to fall on the ground. Again.

**Confessional**

“I am a ninety pound weakling.” Cameron said in a deadpanned expression, “Okay, eighty nine and a half, but that’s not the point.” He waved off.

“I’d be putting an easy target on my back if I aligned with a contestant as controversial as Scott, I need to stay under the radar so when it’s time to vote, everyone will choose people like Lightning and Scott.” The bubble boy explained.

**Confessional**

“Of course I know everyone’s gonna try and choose me.” Scott shrugged, “I need to get someone on here to look worse than me so I can stay in the game!” He looked thoughtfully.

“Someone like Dawn, she has this silly ‘grudge’ against me” he said in quotation marks.

**Confessional**

“-Of course I do!” Dawn exclaimed, “Scott is a vindictive and horrible person, he got B, Sam, and so many others off all for his own gain!” She balled her fist. “And I swore to the great mother earth that he must pay!”

“And so I’m-“

**Confessional**

“-Gonna whoop” Lightning punched a wall.

**Confessional**

“-Everyone else and” Mike crossed his arms.

**Confessional**

“-And take that-“ Cameron said.

**Confessional**

“Million dollars for myself!” Scott exclaimed.

**End Confessionals**

The screen cut to a junk yard.

“Welcome to your one stop shop for flying machine parts, the dump!” Chris introduced, “Revolting AND reasonably priced.” He picked up a flea ridden trash bag causing the others to wince.

“Each player must pick a card out the trash bag to represent their mode of flight!” He announced before reeling back at the smell of the bag.

Dawn went up first and grabbed the slimy bag for a card, “A hot air balloon..?” She muttered walking off.

Lightning went next and picked out a card, “A helicopter?” He asked, “Sweet! Didn’t think I’d get ones till I hit the majors.”

Mike went next and picked his card, “A plane, cool! And impossible to build..” He frowned.

Cameron went scrounging next, “A rocket?! Hooray! My rocket building knowledge is both sophisticated and formidable.”

Scott went last getting the last card, “Huh?! A bird? How am I supposed to build a bird?” He asked as Chris shrugged.

“First camper to show me their finished flying machine wins an advantage, a McLean brand smoke machine!” He exclaimed as Chef showed it off, “Use it as a smoke screen, smoke bees out of your attic or just create spooky ambiance, check it!”

Chef blew smoke at the contestants faces as they coughed and hacked.

“Sweet right? First to win their contraption wins that smokey bad boy.” He said, “Okay campers, prepare to get your dump on, NOW!”

“Hey Cameron, mind helping me?” Asked Mike as he caught up with the bubble boy, “I have no clue how to build a plane.” He laughed.

“Sure, you need a fuselage, an engine, propellers..” Cameron listed off as Mike gave him a thousand yard stare. When he was done listing them he looked to an overstimulated Mike, “Did you get that?” He asked.

Mike shook his head, “Uh- yeah, totally, thanks Cam!” He ran off.

“How to build a bird, hmm..” Scott rubbed his massive chin thoughtfully, “Birds have feathers..” He looked at two rattlesnake seagulls and grinned. The farm boy grabbed the two birds by the chest before stripping away their feathers. He cackled before the creatures glared at him angrily.

“Wait no-!” He shouted as the pounced on him.

“Where will I find the components for a hot air balloon?” Dawn asked to herself walking around. She stopped as a pair of raccoons caught her eye. “Hello little ones.” She waved as they waved back cautiously, “Do you know where I could find the places for pieces of my hot air balloon?” The aura whisperer asked.

The raccoons conversed amongst themselves before beckoning her over past a wall of junk. She followed them for a few minutes before stopping.

Right in front of her was a wheelchair with rope attached to it and some defect fireworks, it was charred with bits of sand in every crevasse. All it needs was a fire source and an envelope.

“Thank you friends!” She pet the raccoons who chirped happily.

Lightning walked around aimlessly before stumbling onto a parachute and heat source. “Huh, someone else could use this on their flying thing!” He realised walking to another corner of the dump.

“Heheh, good luck finding your stuff behind this motorcycle and huge fan that would make a totally bangin’ helicopter!” He laughed, “Aw yeah, who’s the smart one now?”

He paused.

“Wait a minute..”

Scott poured wax and glue onto a bunch of feathers as Mike hammered in a propeller to a massive swan boat he found.

The propeller started spinning as Mike hopped in giddily, “Sweet!” He cheered as the wind flew towards Scott and his feathers.

“Plegh!” The farm boy coughed out feathers as the birds mocked him.

Lightning grunted pushing in his motorcycle on top of the fan, “Aw yeah! I’m makin’ myself a hovercopter. Sha-Zoom!”

Dawn finally finished her hot air balloon after finding both a parachute and a heat source right next to each other. It was strange but she wasn’t going to question it.

Cameron ran across the dump looking for pieces he needed for his helicopter getting more and more worried as he passed by the others completing their rides. He kept running till he hit a large metal wall.

“A seven forty seven engine?!” He exclaimed as he backed up, “Eureka squared!”

The boy opened up the mantle and oohed, “And all the key components are intact, I feel some inspiration coming on!”

After a couple minutes of searching, he found what he was looking for. A lever and an old reclining chair thats paint crackled off at every small touch.

“Huzzah!” He cheered for himself, “Now I just need to-“ cameron leaned forward to grab something at his feet but accidentally leaned the lever forward.

“AHHH!!”

The bubble boy sped through the massive piles of junk blowing away everything in his way before crashing at a pile right behind Chris.

“We have a winner!” Shouted Chris with his megaphone, “Cam finishes first and gets a smoke machine!”

Multiple yells of protest and disappointment could be heard from behind the piles of junk.

“Who will fly high? Who will crash and burn?”

Cameron yelped as his rocket crashed onto him.

“Literally. And how many Gemmy’s will I win for this episode? Find out when we return on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

Cameron patted his rocket before looking around wearily.

**Confessional**

“I’m certain holding onto this to sabotage others is gonna leave a target on my back..” Cameron said thoughtfully, “That’s why I’ll be giving it to another person!”

**End Confessional**

The bubble boy walked up to Scott waving around his wings. “Scott,” he waved, “Sorry for dropping you earlier, if you want-“

Scott immediately snatched the prize out of his hands, “Heh, thanks,” he paused, “Wait, where am I supposed to put it?” He looked at the boy quizzically. Cameron backtracked for a second before looking around the junkyard.

“Here!” Cameron dug out an old baby carrier, attached it to Scott, and put the fog machine in it.

The farm boy grinned as Cameron walked away getting stopped by Mike.

“Cam, why would you do that?!” He whispered.

“Don’t worry Mike, I know what I’m doing.”

“Players!” shouted Chris from his blimp, “Prepare to be challenged in the obstacle course of doom!”

He laughed sadistically while Heather glanced behind her to find the million dollar briefcase.

She gave a smirk while Chris kept laughing unknowingly.

“I’m gonna ace this puppy!” Scott boasted.

“Hope you can flap those wings as much as your jaw.” Mike taunted from his vehicle.

“Just watch,” he smirked, “It’ll be taking a fly while you take a swan dive into the lake.”

Mike rolled his eyes and started his propeller pulling in Scotts wings.

“Hey! Watch the feathers!” He shouted.

“Man, they really hate each other now huh?” Chris asked looking down at the contestants not looking at Heather behind him with a trophy in her hands. “I feel another gemmy coming o- AUGH!”

“WOAHH!!” He shouted being shoved off the plane followed by Chef.

“One gemmy for you and one million dollars for me!” Heather shouted shutting the doors of the blimp shut.

Chris slammed into the ground before being squashed by Chef, “Eurgh, I think I sprained my stubble..” He groaned.

“Uhm Chris, Heathers stealing your mobile air command center?” Cameron pointed out.

“Whatever, got it at the airforce garage sale.” He shrugged before the bubble boy got shoved by Lightning.

“My Sha-Million bucks!” The jock shouted.

“Whatever, not my million bucks.”

“And all your gemmy awards.” Dawn reminded him.

The host paused. “My gemmy’s?!” he cried, “Cancel the obstacle course of doom, new challenge is to stop Heather!” Chris shouted.

“Don’t try to stop me!” The mean girl yelled, “I’ve got gold statuettes and I am NOT afraid to use them!” She exclaimed hurling them to the ground.

“I’ve got you my preciousness’s!!” Chris threw his arms wide open trying to reach for them by got knocked out in the process.

**Confessional**

“I would’ve thought season three made her a nicer person.” Mike shrugged, “But I mean, it IS a million dollars.” He reasoned.

**End Confessional**

“Get your machines airborne and shoot down that zeppelin, aim for the engines, here’s your ammo!” he yelled as Chef handed a basket of eggs, “Fire breathing flying mountain goat eggs!”

“Uhh, goats are mammals?” Cameron pointed out, “They don’t lay eggs?”

“They also don’t breathe fire, unless they live here!” Chris cackled, “Thank you toxic waste.”

Dawn reeled away from the man looking horrified at the thought of throwing the eggs.

“Whoever takes down Heather gets immunity, oh, and look out for the flying mutant fire breathing mountain goats, they are SUPER ticked for some reason.”

Chef whistled glancing away hiding the basket of eggs behind his back.

“Mike tried to vote me off,” Scott monologued, “Now it’s his turn, ain’t nothing gonna stop the Scott-meister.” He said tossing his egg up and down before hearing a growl behind him.

Fang licked his lips as Scott dropped his egg.

“AHHH!!”

Dawn unhooked her rope from the ground gently patting the eggs on her lap. “Shh, it’s ok.” She muttered as Cameron looked at her strangely.

“AHHH!!” Scott shouted being chased by Fang before the shark got its leg tangled up in Dawns rope.

“Hah! Sucks to be you!” Scott cackled.

“Time for Lightning to get some air!” He shouted turning on his engine and flying away.

Mike followed the others lead flying up as Scott trailed behind.

“Hey Mike! Thanks for the lift!” He shouted bouncing on the swan boats head and lifting himself up.

“AHH!!” Mike yelped as the swan boat teetered, “Scott!”

“Man, I’m good.” The ginger said cockily before nearly running into Fang.

“Lightning goin’ long!” The jock announced throwing an egg only for it to bounce back to the ground.

Heather laughed from inside the blimp.

“J-Just a warm up! This one’s for real!”

“I CAN’T CONTROL THIS THING!!” Cameron shouted bumping into Lightning and flipping through the air in circles.

Dawn kept flying upwards before smelling something funny, “Huh? What is-“ She looked around before multiple angry flying goats flew in. “Wait! Don’t I-“ She couldn’t get a sentence out before they started breathing fire towards her and to the blimp.

“You want a piece of me?!” Heather shouted carrying even more statuettes, “Huh?! You want a piece!” She threw the statues at Dawns direction.

“Ow! No I don’t-“ She flew away and out of the statuettes direction.

“The sha-million bucks is mine!” Lightning yelled flying closer in the blimps direction before coughing from fog.

“Oh no you don’t!” Scott shouted from behind him.

“Hey, ain’t that Camerons?!”

Said boy was flying in that direction right now, “What?”

“That’s your prize?! Are you crazy?!” Lightning asked as Cameron grinned ear to ear.

“Why yes, yes I am.” He said pulling out a remote control, “Hey Scott! Eat this!” The bubble boy shouted clicking the button.

And just like that, the fog machine exploded into bits smoking up Scotts wing handles.

“No, no, no, no, NO!” He shouted trying to flap away the flames as he got higher and higher.

**Confessional**

“Of course I wouldn’t give Scott a permanent advantage, that’s why I put a small explosive in MY smoke machine before giving it to him!”

**End Confessional**

“Oh no.” Mike muttered as his lever tore off, “AGH!” He shouted flipping upside and bouncing off the blimp and onto a mountain goat.

“Uhh, nice mutant goat..?” He said before it started flying rapidly away from the blimp.

“Easy goat!” The goat flipped through the air trying to get the boy off him, “Stop! The zeppelins back there! Please stop!” The indie boy cried.

“I said stop!” He shouted pulling on the goats horns. Surprisingly to Mike, it did actually stop. “Hey.. you actually listened to me? No way!”

Scott continued trying to flap away the flames getting higher and higher up until facing the directly towards the sun. “Wait no-“ He shouted as his feathers started falling in clumps, “NOO!!”

He waved his arms around before landing on something, “Phew..”

“Hey! Get off!” Cried Dawn as he opened his eyes realising he was on top of Fang. The extra weight started causing the hot air balloon to go down and towards the ocean.

“Scott!” She shouted.

“Hah! Lightning’s got victory locked!” He shouted, “Sha- AGHH!! The jock crashed through the blimps window as Heather ducked.

The mean girl picked up the briefcase as Lightning got up weakly.

“Huh- oh yeah!” He shouted pointing to the million, “That cool mil is mine, alright girl, hand it over!”

Heather glanced at the million and started getting teary eyed, “Oh.. I’m sorry, all I wanted was the money, but this has gone too far..” She muttered sniffling, “Here just.. take it.”

She gave the briefcase over to Lightning. Right before slamming it on his head.

“AUGH- What is wrong with you?!”

She smacked him again.

“You’re craz-“

She smacked him again.

“Crazy and about to get ten times richer! I deserve to get that money!”

“You mean my money?!”

Lightning ran up to the girl and started trying to wrestle the cash out of her hands causing Heather to crash into the steering wheel as the descended downwards.

“Heather, heads up! Behind you!” Lightning pointed running away.

“Pfft- do you actually expect me to-“

Cameron then crashed into the blimp.

“AHHH!!”

Lightning flailed his arms as he flew to the ground right before the briefcase dropped into his hands. “Woo hoo! Score!” He shouted as Chris arrived in his jetpack.

“One million bucks, finders keepers!” The host shouted nabbing it away.

“Sha-wow, he’s good.”

Cameron tried reaching for the blimp as his grip started loosening from the edge of his vehicle, “Someone help!” He shouted as the rocket jerked and flung him out.

“AHHH!!”

He stopped shouted as a goat grabbed him by the hood. Cameron looked up and saw Mike winking at him from the other goat.

Dawn spit out water as she emerged from the ocean watching Scott get chased by Fang while the blimp sunk into the ground behind her while Heather swam away.

“Wait, where’s the eggs?” She asked looking around.

“AHH!!” Lightning yelled crashing into the water next to her.

The camera then cut to the elimination ceremony.

“Elimination time!” Chris announced, “Cameron, you took out Heather, so you’re safe.” He said throwing a marshmallow to the boy.

“But the rest of you are on the chopping block, regular marshmallow means you’re safe, toxic marshmallow of loserdom means you’re out, and probably mutated.”

“Mike.”

“Lightning, you two are safe.”

“And with three votes against, the toxic marshmallow of loserdom goes to.. Scott.”

“WHAT?!” He shouted.

“You really thought I wouldn’t get you out for elimination Zoey?” Mike stood up as Scott scowled at him.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” The farm boy yelled as Chef dragged him away.

“Don’t worry Scott, you won’t have to be going through this alone.” Chris patted his back.

“I won’t?”

“He won’t?” Asked the other competitors.

“Nope, I arranged for a friend to share your journey.” Chris remarked as Fang jumped out the water.

“AGH!!”

“Everyone say bye Scott!”

“…”

“Eh, good enough.” The host shrugged pulling the leaver.

“NOOOO!!!”

“And then there were four, who will win the million? Who’ll be crushed while millions watch and laugh? Find out next time on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.

Chapter Text

“Previously, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, an epic air battle turned into an epic fail for Scott when Cameron crashed his ride and his chances of winning!” The screen showed Scotts wings falling apart from the flames of his exploded fog machine.

“Mike nearly fell to his death for the hundredth time, Lightning got knocked out by Heather, and Scott got launched from a catapult!”

“We’re down to the final four, whose going to the finals and whose gonna be cut loose?” Chris asked before cutting off the string of Chefs kite.

“Haha, yeah, like that.”

“Find out right now, on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” He shouted.
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The screen panned down to a tree branch where Cameron sat on while he waited for Mike to climb up.

“Ugh.. Cameron, do we have to meet all the way up here?” The indie boy asked as he hung off the ledge with his arms.

“Sorry Mike, It’s the only place that’s private!”

The two slowly twisted their heads to the cameras recording them.

“Besides a few million other people watching..” Muttered the taller.

Cameron cleared his throat and turned away, “Anyways, we need to find a way to get rid of Lightning.” He stated.

“Yeah.. he’s probably the biggest threat we have right now” Mike nodded unaware of said threat being right under them.

“Those are some weird lookin’ birds!” The jock remarked before pausing, “Wait a minute..”

**Confessional**

“Those fools are tryna con- constit- conspire against me!” Lightning exclaimed after struggling for a while.

“Too bad for them, nothing gets past Sha-Lightning-“ He said doing a few kicks and poses before accidentally punching the camera.

**End Confessional**

“Maybe we could work with Dawn to join us and vote off Lightning!” Cameron quipped as Mikes face brightened.

“Gnarly!” Mike cheered as Cameron looked at him funny, “I mean, awesome! Then there’ll be three to one and no chance of-“

CRASH!

Lightning, with no tools to knock the tree down, resorted to his bare hands and punched it resulting in Cameron falling off and Mike dangling from the branch.

“Ough!” Cameron yelped knocking into a bush as Mike accidentally landed in the jocks arms.

“What the-“

“I heard what you and bobble head were sayin’ up there!” Lightning confronted him as Mike tried looking confused.

“Whaaat no, we wouldn’t-“

“I ain’t sha-stupid!” he crossed his arms dropping Mike on the ground as well, “You two better watch your backs cuz-“

Mike kicked Lightning in the crotch causing him to fall over along with the other two.

**Confessional**

“Well that private meeting went well.” Mike shrugged on the left corner of the stall while Cameron rubbed his arm sheepishly on the other.

**End Confessional**

“Hey Dawn!” Cameron waved as he walked up to the girl shuffling tarot cards.

The girl nodded at the bubble boy as a bird flew down and onto her shoulder, “Oh, hello little one..” She muttered.

“I have a most advantageous offer to extend!”

The bird chirped as she nodded along.

“Vote with Mike and I, together we’ll vote off Lightning!”

“That’s amazing news!” The aura whisperer gasped at the bird.

“Really?!” Cameron said, surprised, “Okay, great! See you at the challenge!”

The bubble boy walked away marvelling about how easy that was before Lightning walked up to Dawn who was still talking to the bird.

“Hey creepy girl!” The jock exclaimed. “How about we join in an alliance!”

“I’d love to.” Dawn said to the fluttering bird.

“Let’s go team Lightning!”

**Confessional**

“I was unaware of my fellow competitors talking to me.” She said blankly, “A little birdy told me he had plans of a marriage later in the evening and asked me to conduct.” The aura whisperer explained like she’s done this before.

“I do hope what they said wasn’t too important..”

**End Confessional**

“Challenge time!” Chris announced to the competitors in front of the communal bathrooms. “And since you’ve been abused so frequently, today’s challenge is a super safe and fun challenge!” He said as everyone cheered.

“Get ready for bubbles, flowers, and cott-“ Chris got cut off as he tripped on a pair of roller-skates. “WOAH!” He shouted as the skates rolled him downhill and towards the communal bathrooms.

Everyone winced when the host crashed into the bathrooms and through a stall. Chef ran up to the door of the bathroom and reeled back at the smell, “I need five interns and a fire hose, asap! We’ll get you out of there soon.”

Everyone looked at each other and started pointing fingers in a panic.

Chris coughed and wheezed in the stalls, “Those ungrateful puppets just crossed the line!” he shouted, “Remember those nasty challenges Chef.. the ones that got the red light? The light just turned green!”

Chef slammed the door and grinned, “I’ll bring the pain!” He cackled as lightning rumbled and wind started blowing.

The contestants were frightened for a second before looking at the interns beside Chef handling the special effects.

“…”

The cohost coughed, “Okay, cool it.”

The screen cut to the contestants standing in front of wooden counters.

“Listen up dirt bags, i’m gonna push you till you break, then i’ll take the filthy little broken bits and give them another good breakin!” He said with exaggerated hand expressions, “No wimps are gonna make it my finale, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!”

Everyone nodded.

“First challenge, the cook off!” Chef announced.

“Sha-really? A cook off?” Lightning asked, “What’s next, jumping jacks-“ He got cut off when Chef smashed a pan to his face.

“Shut it or i’ll shut it! Bring in the classic competitor!”

An intern then wheeled in a familiar boy with a towel rapped over his eyes.

“It’s DJ!” Cameron exclaimed pointing.

Chef took off the towel as DJ looked around with a panicked expression.

“No, not here!” He cried, “I vowed never to come here as long as there was breath in my lungs!” The animal lover exclaimed.

“Your contract disagrees dough boy.” Chef brought out his contract before facing the contestants, “You slime buckets are gonna cook something tasty, and this bag of mush is gonna be the judge.” He pointed to DJ.

“You’ve got twenty minutes to make a tasty lunch with whatever you find on the island!” He instructed, “I believe in eating locally. Ready?”

“Uhm, question.” Cameron raised his hand, “What are our options in terms of seasoning?” He questioned.

“GET COOKIN’!” Chef slammed to pots together as Cameron scrammed followed by the others.

Lightning ran around confused as he picked up boulders, looked under, and dropped them looking disappointed.

“Chef doesn’t know what he’s talking about.” He grumbled, “I can’t find food in this forest!”

“Think Lightning think.. what makes steak..?”

He gasped. “TREES!”

The jock proceeded to punch the tree demanding it give him steak.

Cameron grunted as he tried reaching for some glowing green mushrooms sprouting from tree bark.

“Here!” Mike picked up the mushrooms and dropped them into the shorter boys hands.

“Thanks Mike!” Cameron said as he counted the amount.

“You’re welcome, also just wanted to ask, we can count on Dawns vote right?”

“Yep! She agreed to it when I talked to her, there she is right now!”

Cameron pointed to Dawn picking up berries from the bushes, “Hey Dawn, we’re still upholding the deal right?” He asked.

She looked wide-eyed for a second and glanced the other way before nodding and running off.

“See!” Cameron said to Mike who cocked his head.

“Helloo!” Chris shouted inside the stall as the intern outside checked their nails.

“Oh no- NOO!” He shouted as another pipe bursted in the rooms as he started sobbing. Music to every interns ears.

“Whyy..” He shouted crying.

Mike looked at Lightning and Cameron shouting from animals chasing them and hid behind a bush. “Maybe I should go the safe option and make a salad.” He said picking up leaves from a vine.

The indie boy hummed a song as he tossed the salad leaves in a bowl. Right before arms sprouted from the bowl and smacked him on the head continuously.

Lightning looked confused as he sprayed a bottle of green liquid into a pan like it was the first time he used a stove. Which it probably was.

“AGHH!!” He shouted as the pan set on fire. The jock tried throwing water from the sink in it but the fire only got bigger so as a last resort he threw it on an intern.

“These toxic mushrooms will make a delectable quiche!” Cameron said tossing a few into the stove and handling them with a spatula.

Meanwhile, Dawn used a mortar and pestle to crush berries into jam while her water from the lake started turning a concerning shade of green. Though she didn’t notice.

Mike sighed relieved as the vine arms finally died after he crushed them with a mallet. Where did he get the mallet from? He didn’t know.

“Protein, delicious!” Lightning said as he poured a protein shame onto his dish only for it to come back and spit toxins in his face.

“What the..” Dawn looked at her water she was about to put in her mix which was now glowing. She tried getting more water from the tap but the water from the plumbing turned bright green too.

Cameron just smiled as he opened his oven and revealed to the camera a golden brown flakey pie crust.

“Three, two, one.” Chef counted down, “Spatulas down, well, dish it up cupcakes, move!” He shouted as the contestants lined up in front of DJ.

Cameron went first, “Today I made a delicious quiche!” He presented it to DJ who hummed excitedly.

“With toxic mushrooms.”

The animal lover shouted reeling back.

“Next!” Chef demanded.

“I present to you, the living salad!” Mike said as his spider croutons started crawling all over DJ.

An arm then grabbed Mikes shoulder and shoved him away, “HEY!”

“I went with an Italian theme!” Lightning presented the live maggot with protein shake on top, “Ginormous maggot cannelloni in a cream sauce!”

The caterpillar screeched at DJ before being smacked in the head with a pepper shaker.

“What did I tell you?! Stay down!” The jock yelled, “Uhh.. fresh pepper?”

“NEXT!”

Dawn went last with a tray of neon green pastries, “I’ve made some… green scones?” She offered before the toxins seeped into the berries and turned them to eyeballs.

“AHHH!!” DJ shouted in horror as he untangled himself from the ropes keeping him still as he ran for his life.

“Well, looks like we just lost our taste tester.” Chef grunted. “Rule change, you’ve got to eat all of your own weird grub.

Everyone shouted in protest.

“You hurl, you lose.” Chef announced, “Who’s got cuts of steel and who’s gonna blast a barf bomb? It’s a throw up throw down when we get back on Total. Drama. Revenge of the Island!”

Chapter Text

The screen panned to the final four contestants in front of a table with their dishes.

“Alright con-pest-tants,” Chef sneered, “It’s time to eat up the disgusting crud you cooked up before the break.”

“Whoever finishes their meal first without spewing wins the challenge.”

Mike glanced at Lightning as he tried picking at the live maggot with a fork. It did not appreciate that.

“3.. 2.. 1. EAT IT!” The military veteran yelled.

Lightning scooped up some of the sauce he topped on the caterpillar with a spoon and tried it. His eyes rolled into his head as he passed out. 

Cameron smiled eating his quiche while Dawn picked at her scones eyeballs and reeled back at the squishy texture from them.

Meanwhile, Mike also seemed disgusted as he flicked off the spiders from his salad, “Are you sure there isn’t another chall-“

“EAT IT!” Chef shouted with a megaphone nearly getting Mike flung from the sheer force of it.

“Fine.” Mike muttered biting back an insult as he bit into the salad. “AGH-“ he yelped putting his hands around his throat, “I- I can’t-“ He spluttered before running to the forest to empty his stomach.

This was followed by Lightning doing the same as well as Dawn. All while Cameron smiled happily finishing up his dish.

“Done!” The bubble boy cheered as Chef lifted his hand, it was supposed to show his victory but Cameron was so light he was left dangling in the air.

“Challenge is over, Cameron wins!” Chef announced as Mike dizzily cheered for his friend while Lightning groaned and Dawn sighed.

“That’s why HE doesn’t have to wear one of these tracking collars.” The cohost said throwing said collars at the distraught contestants, “Challenge part two, I give you, dork hunter!” 

“The challenge is simple, you’re the dorks, I’m the hunter, you run off into the woods, I hunt you down. First dork to the flag pole wins, pray that you make it before the dork hunter blasts you into a whole new dimension of pain!” He shouted before bringing up a can with his face 

“Rocket prepared spaghetti canon, featuring my own special recipe. Just pack the spaghetti in your rocket canon, dinner is served, IN YOUR FACE!” Chef shouted launching the spaghetti at an intern.

“AGH!” The intern yelped as he was launched to a stone wall, “It burns!”

The teens looked at him in concern as Chef laid down the rules.

“You’ve got twenty minutes to run, hide, and say your prayers, NOW MOVE OUT!”

“AHHH!!”

“What’s taking those interns so long?!” Shouted Chris from the bathrooms as the interns leaned against the walls and stiffed their laughter.

“There’s no way they could’ve forgotten about me!” 

One intern with a shaggy haircut shushed the other two as he picked up a pipe while the other twisted it in place.

“MORE SEWAGE?!” 

“Nobody tracks Lightning!” The jock shouted, “This collars comin’ off!” He grabbed it causing shocks of electricity to attack him on the spot. He yelped and tried again. And again. And again.

“Lightning stop!” Cameron exclaimed, “The collar seems to have an anti-removal feature which sends a strong electric current to the nervous system.” He said as Lightning looked at him baffled.

“…If you take it off it goes zap zap and gives you an owie!”

Lightning blinked and shook his head, “I don’t speak caucasian or whatever man!”

“..”

“If you excuse me, I’ve got a game to- AUGH!” Lightning ran away still trying to pick the collar off.

**Confessional**

“Tracking collars?” Mike said looking annoyed, “Between this and being pushed around since day one, this show is being a total pain in the-“ He got cut off as his collar shocked him even though he didn’t touch it.

“Come on!”

**End Confessional**

Chef cackled as he launched spaghetti balls in his jeep chasing down Mike. 

“LEAVE ME ALONE!” He cried trying to zig zag around the forest as more shots were fired at his direction. He ducked under a branch before turning right and then left as he felt for his head only to realise his beanie was snagged by the branch. 

“Shoot!” The indie boy said as Chef fired spaghetti dangerously close to his head. He made one more turn before gasping. It was a long way down from the cliff ledge he ran in to.

“Hunts over!” Chef grinned cornering the boy. 

“Okay, okay, I give up, you win!” Mike raised his hands trying to find a way to get out.

“Let’s make it official.”

Chef fired his rocket launcher right at Mikes head causing him to tumble and fall over the ledge.

“AHH!!” He shouted as fabric could be heard tearing before crashing into the ground below making a loud crunch.

“Maybe I’ll come back for him later, if I remember.” Chef snickered reversing the jeep.

The camera lowered into the cliff showing a flannel hanging from a loose branch as Mike sniffled and choked back tears staring down at his left wrist which he landed on. 

There was no doubt it was most likely broken or sprained but that wasn’t what he cared about. No, Mike looked at the bracelet given to him by Zoey as it snapped into six pieces.

“Nononono-“ He muttered as he tried picking the pieces back together again which was a futile endeavour. “I’m so sorry.” The boy sobbed.

He sat there for a good while clutching the broken pieces of Zoeys bracelet as thunder roared. “Stupid game, stupid Chef, I want to go home..” Mike repeated over and over again getting more frustrated every time he said it.

Standing up, he stomped his foot and yelled, it probably looked childish but all this bottled up anger at nearly everyone around him finally burst through. He pulled at his shirt caked with dirt ripping the lower part off and tied it around his head before painting his under eyes with dark mud.

Pocketing the pieces of the bracelet, he climbed up the ledge with his good arm and got to work. Mike rolled over a log and shot an arrow to the distance before wincing at his left arm before pulling up a boulder and tying string into a trap.

The boy looked at his work grinning before running off to find Chef.

Dawn walked through the forest humming a tune feeling oddly relaxed before pausing and looking up at grey clouds enveloping the sky. “Oh no.. I sense a dark aura around one of the people in this forest.” She muttered.

“Who’s there?!” Chef shouted hearing a rustle up in a tree branch. “Hmm..” He said seeing that the trees were empty.

Just then, arrows were struck aiming right at Chef. 

The cohost yelled jumping back before tripping onto a net which trapped him midair.

“Whoever did this is gonna pay!” Shouted the man as a chuckle was heard from a high branch.

Meanwhile, Lightning was running through the forest with Cameron close behind.

The latter huffed, “Can’t keep-“ He buckled over clutching on the grass as Lightning scoffed.

“It’s only been twelve miles, you are sha-thetic!” 

The bubble boy looked up to the jock as he suddenly got an idea.

“Huh, Mike?!” Chef muttered as he drove in his jeep, “I thought I left him back in the cliff.” He said unknowingly driving through the boys trap.

“That boy is a glutton for- AHH!!” He shouted as a log swung from a tree and crashed his vehicle.

“Yeah!” Mike cheered from the trees, “Snack on that!”

The war veteran immediately picked himself up and shot at the boy who dodged and cackled leaping away.

“I may have pushed him too far.” Chef muttered.

Dawn looked around the forest cautiously before a shiver ran down her back, “The aura, it’s-“

“GET BACK HERE BOY!” Chef shouted chasing after Mike who jumped in the air and threw a sharpened stone at the man with his right hand.

Chef ducked as the stone went over his head, “Ha! Missed!”

“Wrong!”

Dawn yelped and ran the other direction as the stone tore through a vine causing a boulder to fall from the branches rolling towards Chef.

The war veteran shouted running away as well as Lightning ran through, unknowingly carrying an extra passenger on his back.

“Man, I must be gaining muscle mass! This running is almost making me kinda winded!”

“Sha-bye bye suckers!” He exclaimed running past Mike and Dawn and to the flag pole. “Yes! First to the finish! I beat all-“ He danced and walked backwards only for Cameron to hit the pole from Lightnings back.

“Ow!”

“Huh?!”

The alarm from the flag pole rang, “Cameron wins immunity!” The cohost announced looking winded from running away from the boulder.

“What?! What do I win?!” Shouted Lightning.

“Dinner.” Chef shot the spaghetti at Lightning who yelped.

“My head! My beautiful head!”

The camera cut to the elimination ceremony.

“Elimination time dorks!” Chef said in his hazmat suit. “One of you is going home tonight, except for Cameron who has immunity.”

Lightning glared, “That was supposed to be Lightnings immunity smart guy!”

“What did I do? Besides ‘accidentally’ steal immunity from you-“

“Zip it! Time for the votes, let’s see..”

“One vote for Lightning, one for Mike, and one for Dawn..” He said, “And the final vote goes to..” 

“Lightning!”

“SHA-WHAT?!”

Mike smirked as Dawn sighed of relief.

“Pops is gonna kill me when I get home.” He muttered as Camerons face fell remembering the video messages from home.

The bubble boy leaned towards Mike, “I feel kind of bad for voting him off, do you?” 

“Why should I.” The boy scoffed not looking at Lightnings face. Cameron leaned away looking a bit baffled.

The jock stepped in the catapult with an uncharacteristically defeated face.

“I’ve been waiting to be the hurl master of this game.” Chef grinned.

“And you’re gonna keep waiting!” 

“CHRIS!” Everyone shouted as the host made his way to the docks through jetpack.

“Yep, I’m the hurl master around here, say goodbye Lightning!” He said pulling the leaver.

“SHA-AHHH!!”

“Who will be hurled next? How much are we going to hurl before we hurl them? Find out next time, on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

—————————————————————————

Chapter Text

“Previously on Total Drama Revenge of the Island, I took some time off.. for personal reasons that I’d rather not discuss.” The video discussed it for him showing Chris crashing into the communal bathroom stalls.

“Hey, who edited that in there?! Not funny guys!”

The video switched to the first challenge, “Okay, much better. Chef led the final four players in a revolting cook-off, resulting in almost all the contestants up chucking their insides!” 

“Meanwhile, Mike channeled his inner warrior, taking up the new name of Commando Mike, even Chef was scared.” The video showed Mike setting off multiple traps aimed at the cohost.

“Lightnings plan to sabotage Mike and Cameron backfired accidentally giving Cam the win and giving himself a trip to the hurl of shame!” 

“And this leads us up to-“ The video started repeating the scene of Chris in the communal bathrooms, “Hey! No, no, no!” he yelled shoving the TV into the lake, “Not funny, that editor is SO fired.”

“Ten players down, three to go, only two will move on to the final round. Who will be left standing? Find out right now on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”
.
.
.
.

“Is something troubling you?” Dawn asked to Cameron sitting beside him with a tray of food.

The bubble boy sighed, “It’s Mike,” he answered, “He’s acting different and I don’t have the evidence to back up why.” 

She hummed, “Yesterday, I sensed a negative aura in the woods, at first I presumed it was Lightning but it’s still here even after his elimination, and it’s all around Mike.”

Cameron couldn’t help but chuckle, “Are you su-“

CRASH!

Mike trudged into the room and past the now broken door still scowling, he passed by Chef tripping him and the plates before sitting down with the other two.

Barely glancing at Cam and Dawn he grunted a “Hello” and ate in silence.

**Confessional**

“I don’t really get how Dawn’s aura powers work but-“

Another crash was heard as Mike, who was probably the cause of the sound, started shouting at the tree he hit..?

“-They’re very.. accurate.” He said after a small pause. 

**End Confessional**

“Finalists!” Chris grinned, “Welcome to the mutant forest of terror!” He shouted gesturing to the forest that was overgrown with mutated plants and animals.

Dawn gasped in horror as Cameron backed away slowly nearly falling into a pit of chemicals if it wasn’t for Mike.

“Oh yeah, watch your step, biohazardous sink hole! They put the mutant in mutant forest of terror!”

Mike pulled Cameron by the arm. 

“Thank’s teammate!” The shorter said gratefully. 

Mike shrugged, “You’re as heavy as a handful of grapes.”

“I-“

“They’re also where Chef gets his toxic marshmallows of loserdom!” Chris butted in as the camera turned to show Chef fishing for mallows. “One of you get to eat that later!”

The others looked at each other cautiously.

“The challenge, race through the mutant forest to find the elusive chrisinen flower, first player to present it to me wins immunity!”

“Which means they get to choose who goes home and who to take to the finale?” Dawn quipped as Cameron and Mike grinned at each other from behind.

“Yeah, thanks for doing my job.” Chris rolled his eyes. “The flower you’re looking for is attached to a VERY special plant, a venus fly trap, or as I like to call him, Larry.” 

“The dionaea muscipula?!” Cameron gasped, “Those eat meat!”

“It’s fine,” Mike reassured, “You don’t have that much to begin with” he said as Cameron looked at him blankly.

“Find Larry, and you’ll find the flower. Oh, and watch your step, those sink holes are EVERYWHERE”

The camera zoomed out showing a screaming intern running into a sink hole.

“Wait for it..”

The intern came flying out with mutated legs and a pair of wings as the contestants looked at him in horror.

“Cya Josh, enjoy your new job in the circus!” The host waved.

“Question, how are we supposed to find this Larry?” Remarked Mike.

Chris pulled out a map from his pockets as Cameron ooo’d.

“Ohh, I see! We each get a map!”

“Pfft-“ Chris snickered, “No, you each get a PIECE of the map!” He said tearing the paper into three.

“You think printer cartridges grow on trees?”

Just then, a ripe printer cartridge fell out of a tree behind the contestants.

“You can work together or-“

“C’mon Cameron!” Mike shouted throwing him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and running off.

Chris glanced at Dawn, “Or you could do it alone..”

**Confessional** 

“Do I actually weigh that little?” Cameron said sitting on one side of a scale and throwing a handful of grapes to the other. The weight of the grapes caused its side to sink lower.

“Ohh..” He groaned.

**End Confessional**

“Okay.. I seem to have the final part of the map.” Dawn hummed nervously watching her step. She watched as a herd of mutated deer with antlers covering up over half their body ran past as she shuddered.

“Chris is a cruel, cruel man.” She tightened her grip on the map as she stepped forward.

“AHH!!” She shouted nearly falling into a sink hole.

Stepping back a few paces the aura whisperer grimaced as she heard a laugh from the distance.

“Uhm Mike, are you okay?” Cameron asked, “If there’s anything wrong you could tell me.”

“We’ve reached the end of the trail.” Mike said opting to ignore his friend’s question, “Do you remember what the last part of the map showed before Chris ripped it?” He asked.

“Well-“

“Duck!” 

The pair jumped behind a bush as Dawn ran up the trail, looked at her map and ran ahead. 

“Never mind, there’s the map piece I need.” The indie boy said as he followed the girl closely.

“You mean the piece we need?” Cameron asked, “Right..? Right?”

**Confessional**

“Cam is great.” Mike said, “But he is such a word nerd. I, we, you, me, what does it matter? We’re on the same team right?”

**End Confessional**

Dawn jumped back hearing a rustle from a nearby bush, “I know someone is there nearby.” She said furrowing her eyebrows.

“..”

“No you don’t.” 

“Damn it Cameron!” 

“Mike, Cameron?” Dawn asked as the former jumped out the bush, “Hey! What the-“

Mike pulled the map piece from out of her hands and made a run for it as Cameron trailed along.

“Sorry Dawn!” The bubble boy waved trying to catch up nearly falling into multiple traps while doing so.

“Give it back!” She yelled chasing the two.

**Confessional**

“Yeah, I feel a little bad but at least I’m making an attempt to win.” Mike scowled.

“Is it just me or is Cameron just acting as mutant bait?”

**End Confessional**

“Are you sure this is the path-“ Cameron said before nearly tripping onto the acid.

“Come back!-“ Dawn yelled angrily before halting to a stop at the river and snatching up the map piece.

“The bog!” They all shouted in realisation.

“And theres the plant!” Cameron pointed to Larry, “It’s huge..”

The speaker turned on, “Nope, he’s colossal!” Chris grinned.

“Will our contestants live long enough to pick that flower?” He asked, “And how many lawsuits will be filed if they don’t? Find out when we return on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

Chris sniffled a bit as he opened up a spiral notebook. Chef just sighed. The photos taped onto the notebook showed Chris coddling and playing with a sentient venus fly trap.

“Ah, Larry..” he said wistfully, “You used to be such a sweet cuddly little guy. We were inseparable.. until I left him on the island and kind of forgotten about him for a few years while the toxic waste piled up mutating him into a freakish mistake…” Chris shut the notebook wiping a tear from his eye, “They grow up so fast..”

Chef rolled his eyes.

**Confessional**

“I knew coming back to the island would dig up old memories, but crying over a stupid ol’ plant?!” The veteran said in exasperation, “That’s just pathetic.”

**End Confessional**

“So..” Cameron pushed his glassed up to his face, “What’s the game plan team mate?”

“Isn’t it obvious? Just jump over the rocks and I’ll snatch the stupid flower.” Mike huffed stretching his arms.

“I’m unsure if that’s the best idea.” Dawn quipped staring at a particular stone.

“And who was talking to you again?” The taller scrunched his brows as Dawn shrunk in on herself, “Stand back Cam.” He said hopping onto the stones.

“What the-“

The boy barely maintained his balance as the “rock” Dawn was looking at emerged from the lake to reveal the shell of a turtle the size of a car.

“AHHH!!” He shouted as it jumped upwards flinging the indie boy backwards.

“Why didn’t anyone tell me about that?!” Mike said getting up again. Dawns eye twitched before she ran off screen.

**Confessional**

“This show has corrupted so many contestants.” Dawn said taking in a deep breathe and letting it out, “I don’t wish to be a bystander again this time.”

**End Confessional**

The camera followed Dawn as she scoured the forest for leaves murmuring for the help of mother nature.

She jumped upwards as the wind shifted to the left. The aura whisperers face brightened as she ran in that direction.

The plants, both mutated and normal, subconsciously leaned towards her as she dashed past them finally stopping when she found a pile of vegetables.

Picking them up she ran in the direction she came from and hoped the other two were still okay.

“C’mon Cam, let’s get the flower already!” Mike exclaimed as Cameron gulped as Larry swallowed a mutant mountain goat whole after it touched the flower.

“B-but Larry, he’s so big and carnivorous..”

The indie boy scowled and lifted Cameron up by the front of his hoodie, “Snap out of it, and stop being such a coward, I need that flower!” He snapped.

“You mean we need that flower, WE!” The bubble boy yelled back angrily.

“That’s what I said!”

“Fine.” He relented, “From what happened to the goat, that flower must be Larry’s bite sensor, the problem is that there’s no way to grab the flower and leave his mouth fast enough..”

“Hm.” Mikes eyes trailed to the vines hanging from the trees, “I’ve got a plan.”

“Uhh Mike, for the record-“ The tree creaked as Mike lowered Cameron to the mouth of the venus fly trap with a vine tied around his waist, “-I don’t like this plan!”

The indie boy grunted, “You don’t have to like it, now focus Cameron! It’s all about team work!”

**Confessional**

“Teamwork” Cameron said making quotation mark gestures with his hands, “Meaning I’ll stand over here and ‘help’ YOU get turned into mutant plant food?!”

**Confessional**

“Pfft, like Cameron has the body strength to lower anything heavier than a walnut down, my pet guiana pig PJ is stronger than he is.” Mike rolled his eyes.

**End Confessional**

“ACHOO!” Cameron sneezed from the flowers pollen causing him to fly backwards, “I-“ he sneezed again, “Must be allergic to mutant pollen..”

“CAM!” Mike pulled the vine upwards just in time as Larry snapped him mouth shut, “Try again!”

“O-on second thought, I don’t even like flowers, or winning-“ The tree branch carrying Camerons weight started to buckle.

“Come on Cameron!”

“Ah-“ He was about to sneeze before it settled down when he got the flower. “I think I- ACHOO!!”

The flower fell out of his grasp and flew away with the wind as the bubble boy flew backwards and back where Mike was.

“Great, way to get the flower bobble head.”

“Way to almost get me eaten alive!”

Dawn then arrived looking winded with bundles of vegetables in tow, “Hi,” she said, “Wheres-“

She paused as Larry roared loudly with massive roots shooting outwards like arms and legs as it chased after the flower.

“…”

Dawn immediately hopped on the rocks and went up to the giant turtle, “Hello there li- giant creature.” She said trying to maintain her composure, “I need your help and I’ll give you these if you’d like to?”

The turtle looked at the abundance of vegetables in her hands and nodded opening its jaws. The aura whisperer gave over the plants and hopped on the creatures shell, “We need to go after that flower!” She pointed.

The other two looked wide-eyed at the scene.

“So.. are we still a team?” Asked Cameron.

“Of course, why wouldn’t we?” The latter raised an eyebrow.

**Confessional**

“Cam may as effective as a pocket knife in a gun fight, but he did help me find Larry.” He blinked for a few seconds, “U-us, I meant us, how often have I been doing that?” Mike asked with his old panicked expression.

**End Confessional**

“C’mon! Just a little more-“ Dawn reached her hand out as she and the turtle ducked from the swatting roots flying her way, “Got it!”

“Think again!” Mike shouted snatching it from her hands as Dawn yelled at him. Larry’s attention directed towards Mike now as he narrowly dodged the roots.

“Cam, catch!”

“Got it!” Cameron yelled sneezing from the pollen, “AHHH!!” He yelled as the plant started chasing after him next.

“Throw me the flower, he’s gaining on you Cam!” Shouted Mike.

“Take your time Cam.” Chris called out as he snickered, “Larry hasn’t had a decent meal since I stopped feeding him three years ago, poor guy must be famished!”

Cameron shouted in panic as he got chased by both Larry and the turtle.

“Just give it to me Cam, I can win this!”

“YOU can win this and vote ME off?!” Cameron shouted as he stopped running, “Friendship finale my-!”

Larry used this time to grab Cameron and throw him into its mouth with the flower flying away again.

Chris buckled over in laughter at the sight, “You’re welcome Larry!”

Mike grabbed ahold of the flower and made a run for the finish line right ahead.

“MIKE!” Shouted a muffled voice from inside the plant.

“Cameron..?”

“Help!” He cried as the indie boy had a troubled expression on his face.

He looked at the flower and the finish line right ahead but then at Larry. Mike dropped his shoulders and then the flower.

“Hey goat breath!” Mike shouted as he jumped upwards and punched Larry where his throat should be, a root roped Mike upwards and into his mouth ad well as he continued punching aimlessly.

Dawn arrived at the scene still on the turtles back, “Oh my goodness!” She shouted jumping off the turtle looking around for a way to get the plants attention.

“LARRY!” She yelled as the plant looked down to see her on the turtle with the flower in hand waving it around like a red cape to a bull.

Larry roared as it chased after her.

“Come on Larry!” Chris yelled, “She’s almost made it!”

“Release-“ a root thumped on the ground nearly squashing Dawn making her yelp, “-Them right now!”

Another root nearly hit her as she jumped forward, landing right past the finish line.

“And Dawn wins!” Chris announced snatching the flower from her hands and walking to Larry.

“Larry, buddy! Look what I rescued for you!” He shouted handing the flower to the plant who spit out Cameron and Mike.

The venus fly trap slurped up the flower as Chris cooed.

“Who’s a good man-eating plant? Larry’s a good man-eating plant, yes you are!” He smiled scratching the nape of Larry’s neck.

“Aww” Dawn grinned.

“Aww..” Mike and Cameron groaned. The former looked at the bubble boy and extended a hand to him.

“Cam?”

The boy looked up and smiled taking his hand.

“Elimination time!” Chris announced, “Dawn, by bringing the flower to the finish line while your fellow contestants were about to become chowder, you’ve secured yourself a place in the finale, AND your opponent in said finale!”

Mike and Cameron looked at each other nervously.

“Who will it be Mike, the formerly savage commando, or will it be-“

“Me.” Cameron said, “It will be me.” He said lowering his head.

“What?” Mike asked in shock, “Cameron, you deserve that place more than anyone!”

“No I don’t, I mistrusted the first person on the island who trusted me. And-“

“Uhh Cam?” Chris raised a brow, “Thats nice and all but this isn’t your choice to make.”

“No. It’s my time. I know it and I embrace it. Chris you may hurl when ready.”

Dawn frowned as her shoulders slumped, “I apologise for this Cameron, but I choose Mike to be hurled.” She said pointing a pale finger at the indie boy.

“What?!” They shouted.

“But- Mikes a more worthy opponent?!”

“I’m not going to deny that, but you saw him these last two weeks, being in this contest isn’t doing him any good.” She reasoned, “This is the safest option for him.”

Mike sighed as he stepped in the catapult.

“Bon voyage Mike, and bon appetite to those hungry sharks in the water!” Chris grinned as he pulled the lever.

“AHHH!!”

“Well, I for one am relieved, a friendship finale would’ve been a boring happy snooze fest. Though I don’t know if this one is much better.” He grimaced at the two short scrawny finalists.

“It’s time for a science-fiction show down! Next time on the epic final round on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” Chris shouted.

Chapter Text

“Last time of Total Drama Revenge of the Island, the final three went hunting for my old pal Larry the human fly trap!” The screen showed the giant sentient plant monster chasing the contestants as Chris cackled in the background.

“Aww! Adorable!”

“Cameron and Mike WERE about to take each other to the finale, but major trust issues pulled them apart!” The two were seen arguing during the duration of the episode.

“In the end, Dawn won immunity and gave Mike the old HEVE HURL!”

“Now, only two competitors remain, Cameron and Dawn. In the ultimate Total Drama Showdown, it’s Camerons brains and logic up against Dawns.. whatever you call it.” Chris muttered the last bit as Chef walked up to the dock with his shiny pink dress and the cash prize.

“Get your popcorn and get comfy. These two are going to give it their all for our awesome cash prize of ONE. MILLION. DOLLARS!”

“Right here, right now, on the epic finale of TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”
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“Poor Mike,” Cameron sighed, “He really deserved to make it to the finale.”

Dawn and he stopped in the middle of their retreat back to the cabins after the hurl of shame.

“I apologise. This show was horrible to his stability, and besides you’ve earned this spot just as much as he did.” The aura whisperer reassured him.

The boy cracked a smile, “Thank you Dawn.” He said.

“I still do intend on beating you and taking the prize money though.” The blonde grinned walking away.

“Not if I have anything to say about it!” Cameron exclaimed defiantly but still smiling as he rushed to catch up with her.

**Confessional**

“Dawn isn’t the worst person to have to fight against in the finale. I mean, imagine if I had to fight Lightning!” Cameron chuckled at the thought

“This formerly feeble bubble boy has come a long way, and I’m positive I’ve built the strength and endurance needed to survive any hurdles Chris puts in my way!” He crossed his arms proudly before a monarch butterfly, similar to the one from an earlier episode, flew in.

“Aww! It’s-“ He got cut off as it landed on his head, successfully weighing him down.

“AGH!”

**Confessional**

“Am I an advocator for violence? Of course not!” Dawn said looking at the monarch butterfly landing on her finger, “Of course, I’ve made a few exceptions in this show.”

She side-eyed the wall remembering Scott.

“But, Cameron is a friend of mine so I’ll play as fairly as possible.” She nodded.

A loud horn then blew from outside scaring the butterfly and Dawn.

“AHH!!” She yelled covering her ears

**End Confessionals**

The underpaid interns blew their horns with Chris’s face on a banner hung onto them as Chef pulled in a chariot with Chris in a white toga and a golden laurel wreath on his head.

“All hail mighty McLean!” The host shouted cockily.

“Hail McLean..?” Dawn muttered.

“Yep! I’ve got the whole Greek robes and everything!” He grinned.

“You mean Roman toga?” Cameron corrected.

“Psshh whatevs. Slave! Bring me my mystic seeing glass!” He shouted.

The rightfully titled intern rolled in a television while giving Chris a raspberry.

“Hey! You know, if this was the ancient times, I would have had your head chopped off by now!!” The host shouted.

The three interns looked at each other like they wanted to stab Chris in a meeting of the senate.

“Anywho, as a reward for making it to the finale, you’re getting a second chance to see your family back home!”

“No way!”

“Yay..”

The screen lit up as Camerons mother smiled back from the screen.

“Mom!” Cameron cheered.

“Cammy-bear! You look taller since you left, and is that muscle tone?”

“Indeed it is, I haven’t puked due to exercise in weeks!”

She smiled, “That’s great honey! But I’m sure you remember my video message? Purified air is getting very expensive, if you don’t win the million we’ll have to deflate your bubble!”

“Seriously?!” He cried.

“Love you Cammie-bear, don’t forget to floss! Oh, and win!”

The screen turned off.

Dawn pat Camerons shoulder reassuringly as he sighed downcast at the news.

“Don’t worry-“

The screen lit up again, this time with Dawns family.

“Dawn!” Her mom waved and smiled a little too wide.

“Mom.” She replied half-heartedly as she dropped her hand from Camerons shoulders, “How have things been.?”

“It’s been great, the family LOVES living in the camper van, rights kids?”

There were some small disinterested whoops and cheers from the background as Dawns dad cleared his throat.

“We hope you get the million, it’d be really useful for gas, storage expansion, actual beds, a shower, an actual toil-“

The screen cut off there.

“…”

The screen changed to Dawn and Cameron on the back of Chris’s chariot as Chef pulled them into the woods.

“Where to?” Cameron asked, “Haunted forest? Mount looming tragedy? I was quite partial to mount looming tragedy!”

“Nah, somewhere WAY more dangerous, for the most painful total drama finale competition ever!” Chris cackled.

“Even worse than last season..?” Dawn asked looking nervous.

“Hopefully!”

The chariot stopped a few moments later, “Behold, the Chrisosseum!” The host shouted pointing forward to an arena surrounded by wooden boards and Chris’s face.

The screen shifted to Chris sitting on his throne from a booth in the arena that oversaw the entire ground level as the two same interns blew their horns again.

“Finalists, say whats up to your cheering sections!”

“Mike, Zoey, Anne Maria, Brick, and Lightning from the mutant maggots, and from the toxic rats, Staci, B, Sam, Dakota, Jo, and whats left of Scott!”

The camera pointed downwards to the disheveled head of Scott with a robot cart where his body should’ve been.

The contestants cheered for the person they were rooting for as Dawn and Cameron waved and grinned.

“What happened to Scott?” The latter asked.

“Yeah.. Fang had a little too much fun with him after he took the hurl of shame so we got him this nifty trauma chair, it even has lights that blink for yes or no!”

“That seems inhumane.?” Dawn said.

“Hell yeah it is!” Chris laughed as he relaxed on his throne.

“I ain’t cheering for none of these weaklings! Lightnings supposed to be the one fighting!” The jock crossed his arms.

“I’m not cheering either, this is the lamest turn out ever!” Jo grumbled.

“Oh I think you WILL cheer, otherwise I’ll be forced to unleash HIM!” Chris pressed a button as the platform from the bottom row of the bleachers raised and revealed a chained up Fang who growled at Scott beeping violently red.

“Any questions?”

“..Go Cameron.” Jo rolled her eyes.

“On with the main event, the final challenge of the season IS.. a one on one gladiator battle royale, but first you’ll need to use your imagination to get whatever you could find in the arena and use it as armour or weapons!” He explained.

“You could find these items right HERE!” Chris pointed to a small pile of junk.

“Ooo, that flame thrower could be extremely useful!” Cameron remarked.

“But that’s not all, CHEF!!” The host shouted as the contestants gaped looking at the helicopter above them.

A dumpster dangled from the bottom of the helicopter before Chef pressed a button to release the contents of the bin.

“Thank you Chef!” Shouted Chris as his cohost flew away.

“You’ve each got thirty minutes to collect crud from mount junkmore and assemble your arsenal, but watch your step, I may have loaded the dumpster with a ton of boobytraps!”

“AND GO!”

The two ran to the dumpster pile and started digging as the contestants cheered them on.

“AHH!!” Dawn shouted as she set off the first boobytrap, a stink bomb.

Some cheered while others winced.

“Ooo seven hundred mega hertz!” Cameron smiled picking up a rusty computer. Putting it down he looked back at the pile and saw a hazmat suit.

“Ahh, safety first!” He pulled the suit only to be shot into the air from an explosive.

Mike and Zoey winced.

Dawn paused from grabbing a trash lid, “Hm. What is that I hear?” She muttered digging into the pile.

Two pairs of red eyes stared back at her, one small and the other large.

Dawn grinned, “I remember you!”

“Go Cameron!” Zoey shouted as Mike cheered.

The bubble boy pulled out a ship and revealed the engine he needed from it, “Yes!” He cheered before it crashed into his lower half, “OW!”

“Hey blondie! You ain’t got any weapons or doo-hickeys yet!” Anne Maria shouted at Dawn who smiled back.

“I know!” She shouted back.

Cameron charged the computer using a toxic marshmallow as Dawn dug up different areas of the trash pile.

The two were seen running around and planning for just a while longer right as the horns announced that their time was up.

“And time is up, finalists, take your positions for the ultimate total drama showdown, last man standing wins ONE. MILLION. DOLLARS!”

The contestants cheers quieted down as the arena remained void of visible contestants.

“Hey, where the heck are they?” Brick asked looking around.

Just then, the sound of animals roaring and chirping from the inside of the trash pile could be heard as mutated giant birds, plants, beetles, and the maggots emerged from the pile with Dawn on top of the giant maggots head with mutant plants in hand.

A loud stomp could be heard from the other end of the arena as a robot leg the size of a dinner table entered the cameras view. The camera turned upwards to reveal Cameron inside the head of the giant robot controlling multiple panels of buttons and levers.

“Game on!” Cameron shouted being a bit muffled from being inside the robot.

The teens cheered.

“Man, I don’t know who to cheer on, I usually pick the underdog but which one’s the underdog?” Sam scratched his head.

“We’re about to find out Sam!” Chris grinned before cackling, “Oh yeah, THIS is gonna be good. Find out who’ll win the ultimate battle brutal when we return on TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

Chapter Text

Thunder rumbled as the former contestants shouted and cheered on for the final two.

“It’s the final challenge of the season. A gladiator battle to end all gladiator battles!” Chris narrated from his throne.

The two raised their weapons, or mechanical robot arm, ready to attack before the host cleared his throat. Dawn and Cameron looked up confused.

“Hey! I ain’t done yet,” He grumbled, “In the grand Total Drama tradition, there’ll be a few obstacles to deal with which I will release into the ring whenever I feel like it!”

Dawns shoulders slumped, “Ah.” She said unsurprised. Cameron shared the same expression as her.

“The match ends in the chance that one gladiator pins the other for three seconds!” Chris added.

“Three seconds?” Asked Cameron, “That’s it?”

Chris shrugged, “Got to make do with our screen time bro.” He said before grinning, “And. GO!”

Dawn immediately threw a burning mutant plant at the robots right leg causing the paint to get scorched along with burning a hole in the robots foot.

“Hey!” The bubble boy shouted back as he pressed a yellow button and pulled on his steering wheel moving backwards as a bolt of energy released from the robots arm and aimed at Dawn.

Chris’s grin faltered slightly when the girl emerged from the explosion relatively unscathed with a few burn marks but shrugged, “Time for a close encounter of the mutant kind!” He said pressing a button.

“Finalists, take your positions for the ultimate Total Drama showdown!” He shouted as a wall opened from behind them revealing four mutant fire breathing mountain goats.

They yelled as two goats aimed at Cameron while the other two aimed for Dawn and the other mutant creatures.

The latter jumped off the mutant maggot running past as she tried coaxing the creatures to calm down while Cameron tried shaking off the goats who chomped down on his robots arms and legs.

“Get off! You’re eating the wires, come on!” Cameron shouted pulling a lever causing the robot to spin in the form of a tornado flinging the goats away. The other two goats flew after them as Dawn sighed of relief.

“Robot strength at sixty seven percent!” Cameron gasped.

“Not for long!” The aura whisperer exclaimed pointing mutant squirrels at the boy as they started zapping him. She pulled another mutant plant from her side- this time it was a deep purple tulip looking flower that was oozing slime from its center. -She threw it aiming for the top part where Cameron sat behind a glass frame.

The slime blocked the boys view as the squirrels kept zapping him. He pressed down a white button opening window wipers as he blasted fire at Dawns direction.

“AGH!” She shouted crashing to the ground as the rough ground tore into her skin. The rocks cut into her leggings and sweater as some contestants winced.

“See, this is why I said to make armour!” Chris shook his head disapprovingly like a disappointed father. “Anyways.” He pressed the button releasing a mutated alligator.

“Run blondie, run!” Anne Maria shouted as the mutated creature stalked closer to her. Dawn pointed at the robot behind the alligator.

The creature looked behind her confused as Dawn used this time to pick up a mannequin leg in her reach and swung it where it hurts.

“EESH!” Chris winced reeling backwards as the alligator fell backwards.

“Sorry!” Dawn apologised limping towards the mutant maggot. She tossed another plant at the robot but Cameron redirected it and accidentally aimed right at the booth.

“AGH!” Shouted the host as he and the interns ducked away from the exploding plant. “Uh oh.” He said looking at the remote which got the brunt of the plants destruction.

Just then, an entire half of the arenas floor opened up and revealed nearly every other mutant creature from the island.

“AHH!!” The two shouted.

**Confessional**

“Larry.” Mike said looking horrified.

**Confessional**

“Mutant gofers!” Zoey shouted.

**Confessional**

Scott’s robot body beeped red.

**End Confessionals**

The former contestants ran away from the bleachers as the mutants started chasing after them.

“Our friends! We have to save them!” Cameron shouted as Dawn ran to help B from a mutant bird.

“What no! Don’t go saving these losers, keep fighting!” Chris shouted from the booth before three gofers jumped in and started closing him in. “Never mind! HELP!”

A giant stem swung the gofers out of the way in a matter of three seconds.

“That’s extra fertiliser for you tonight!”

Dawn got multiple creatures to run back into the forest and away from the arena as Cameron’s robots arm carried the contestants back to the bleachers. The two then got ready to fight again.

The aura whisperer swung more plants and aimed more creatures at Camerons direction causing the robots power levels to go down.

“Come one Kid, toss her into the muck!” Beatrice yelled looking ready to jump into the arena to do it herself.

“I’ve got this!” The bubble boy yelled pressing a big red button. The robot emitted an ear piercing screech forcing everyone in the arena to cover their ears.

The mutant creatures panicked at the sound and ran off into the forest as the sound continued. Dawn took little notice as she shut her eyes and covered her ears but Cameron took the opportunity to jump down from his robot.

“DAWN WATCH OUT!” Brick shouted as B furiously signed at her to no avail.

“Sorry!” Cameron shouted tackling the girl.

“AHH!” She yelled.

“One.”

“Two.”

“Three!”

The noise shut off as Chef pulled in Chris with the chariot.

“He’s done it! Cameron has done it!” He announced, “Cameron wins Total Drama Revenge of the Island AND the million dollar prize!”

Contestants carried Cameron upwards cheering him on as B picked up Dawn from the ground. She gave a small smile as the two went to congratulate the winner.

**Confessional**

“From a boy in a bubble to a million dollar winner! I wouldn’t believe it myself if it wasn’t all on tape!” Cameron cheered.

**Confessional**

Dawn sighed, “Oh well, this has been an enjoyable experience for the most part.” She said smiling, “Though, this morning the tea leaves did say something else was going to happen. Mother natures revenge as it said.”

**End Confessional**

“Congratulations Cameron.” Chris said as the two stood on the docks while the others waited in a ship behind them. “To the winner go the spoils, one million dollars in cold hard cash!”

“Thanks!” Cameron exclaimed struggling to carry the briefcase as he dragged it to the ship, “And thanks for your guys support, it made all the difference!”

“So, whatcha gonna spend it on first?” Asked Anne Maria, “Hair or shoes? Because both need a LOT of work.”

“Didn’t you hear his mom? He needs the cash to pump up his bubble!” Sam retorted.

“Well, I WAS going to use the bubble to heal my shattered body, but after surviving without any crippling injuries, I don’t need to go back to my bubble ever again!” He said, “And since I couldn’t have done it without all of you so I’m gonna spend it on all of you guys instead!”

Everyone cheered.

“Hello biggest television and every game set up in existence!”

“I could finally open my dream gym!”

“Fashion school, here I come!”

The others looked at Brick strangely.

He crossed his arms, “Yeah, you heard me.” He scoffed.

“Well, that’s it for another season.” Chris said as the ship drove away, “Except for one last surprise I hid on their boat. First rule of show biz, always go out with a bang.” He pressed the button.

“WAHH!!” He shouted as the docks exploded from under him causing the contestants to roar in laughter as he plopped in the water.

“Huh?!” He cried as Chef grinned. “Chef!” Chris shouted saying a few words not safe for the television program, “Until next time, I’m Chris McClean, and this has been TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!”

“You’re busted McClean!” A voice shouted from above him.

“Huh?! For what?!” He yelled as multiple men in hazmat suits arrived as well as three helicopters.

“Creating an environmental disaster, that’s what. Residents of Wawanakwa, your residence is now under government protection. Consider yourself quarantined, get ready for deep scrubs and decontamination!”

“WOO HOO!” Everyone, including the interns, cheered as the men put Chris in hand cuffs.

Chapter Text

Dawn got multiple creatures to run back into the forest and away from the arena as Cameron’s robots arm carried the contestants back to the bleachers. The two then got ready to fight again.

The aura whisperer swung more plants and aimed more creatures at Camerons direction causing the robots power levels to go down.

“Come one Kid, toss her into the muck!” Beatrice yelled looking ready to jump into the arena to do it herself.

“I’ve got this!” The bubble boy yelled pressing a big red button. The robot emitted an ear piercing screech forcing everyone in the arena to cover their ears. The mutant creatures panicked at the sound and ran off into the forest as the sound continued.

Dawn winced squinting her eyes at the massive robot stomping closer toward her and ran. 

Cameron followed her movement through the robot as she turned a sharp corner to the right of the arena, the robot nearly tripping to follow.

‘Over there!’ She thought to herself noticing the damage on the robots legs caused by her animal friends with the left having the most impact.

The aura whisperer halted to a stop. 

“Dawn move!” Shouted Brick with his hands still clasped over his ears from the noise. The girl did just that as she dashed to the stomping robot.

Shouts of protests erupted from the former contestants as she unclasped her hands from her ears and scaled the robots leg.

Her ears rung loudly as she grasped the sparking wires and began tugging on them. Cameron yelled from inside the robot but Dawn couldn’t hear.

SNAP!

“AGHH!” Cameron yelled as the robot shut down and lost balance stopping the ear piercing noise. Dawn jumped down before it could crash into her.

The robot landed on the ground with a loud THUNK covering the air with dust from the ground. Contestants coughed and wheezed shaking the dust away. When it settled, Dawn was seated on top of the robot.

“One.”

“Two.”

“Three!”

Chef pulled in Chris with the chariot.

“She’s done it! Dawn has done it!” He announced, “Dawn wins Total Drama Revenge of the Island AND the million dollar prize!” Chris announced.

Contestants picked up Dawn cheering as Mike and Zoey picked up Cameron by the arms and congratulated him for making it this far.

“Thanks guys,” Cameron smiled readjusting his glasses, “Now let’s get to the docks!”

**Confessional**

“I did it!” Dawn gasped, “I won the million dollars!” She whooped and cheered grinning.

“And I only used a little violence to do so!” 

**Confessional**

“I’m pretty proud of myself.” Cameron stated smiling, “Sure I hadn’t won but I’m still proud of myself for making it this far! I probably won’t even need to go back into the bubble!”

**End Confessionals**

“Congratulations Dawn.” Chris said as the two stood on the docks while the others waited in a ship behind them. “To the winner go the spoils, one million dollars in cold hard cash!” 

“Thank you.” She said grabbing the briefcase and walking up to the boat with her former contestants.

“What’ll you use the money for first blondie?” Anne Maria asked muttering something about awful sweaters and collared t-shirts.

“Well, I’ll be using five hundred thousand donating to charities and fundraisers helping mother nature of course.” She responded.

‘And the other half?’ B signed.

“I’ll split it for all you guys!” 

Everyone cheered.

“Hello biggest television and every game set up in existence!” 

“I could finally open my dream gym!”

“Fashion school, here I come!”

The others looked at Brick strangely. 

He crossed his arms, “Yeah, you heard me.” He scoffed.

“Well, that’s it for another season.” Chris said as the ship drove away, “Except for one last surprise I hid on their boat. First rule of show biz, always go out with a bang.” He pressed the button.

“WAHH!!” He shouted as the docks exploded from under him causing the contestants to roar in laughter as he plopped in the water.

“Huh?!” He cried as Chef grinned. “Chef!” Chris shouted saying a few words not safe for the television program, “Until next time, I’m Chris McClean, and this has been TOTAL. DRAMA. REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!” 

“You’re busted McClean!” A voice shouted from above him.

“Huh?! For what?!” He yelled as multiple men in hazmat suits arrived as well as three helicopters.

“Creating an environmental disaster, that’s what. Residents of Wawanakwa, your residence is now under government protection. Consider yourself quarantined, get ready for deep scrubs and decontamination!”

“WOO HOO!” Everyone, including the interns, cheered as the men put Chris in hand cuffs.