Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Oh great job. Your spell almost killed us.”

“It also saved us.” Loki hissed back, getting up from where they were both sprawled on the ground.

“When I heard dimension hopping , I hadn’t considered it to be a free fall right off the ledge of the tower.” Tony's heart was still hammering in his chest. The only reason they weren’t a bloody puddle on the sidewalk was because Loki’s spell had stopped their fall mere seconds before they would have made impact with the ground.

“May I remind you that it was you who did the spatial calculations?” Loki said, offering his hand to Tony.

“No, you may not.” Tony took Loki’s outstretched hand and pulled himself to his feet. “Anyways, do you think it worked?”

At first glance, the city surrounding them looked exactly like the New York he knew and more or less loved, but the longer he looked around himself, more and more oddities caught his eye. The buildings themselves might have looked very similar, but something about the city was different, it was somehow cleaner . There was no dirt piling on the street corners, no graffiti marking the walls and even the sidewalks looked so clean one might as well eat off them. 

Tony could feel the tingle of Loki’s magic in the air, probably analyzing the fabric of the universe , or whatever he always called it. After hours of time spent together in the workshop, when Loki had begrudgingly allowed him to scan him with all types of sensors pointed at him, Tony had developed a bit of a sensitivity regarding the feel of his magic.

As quickly as it had come, it went away again and Loki turned to him with a triumphant glint in his eyes. “It worked.”

“It did indeed.” A mechanical voice called and suddenly they were surrounded on all sides. But it was no cause for concern, not when the voice was just as familiar as the look of the metal suits around them.

Tony grinned. “Well, hello there, me .”

Escorted by Iron Man armors on both sides, they entered the tower. Despite the eerily familiar voice, there hadn't actually been anyone in the suit. 

AI-controlled first responder. Tony grinned. Just the way he had set up the system at home. 

“Welcome!” JARVIS’ voice greeted them in the lobby, and didn't that send an odd feeling into his stomach. “Mister Stark will be waiting for you.”

Tony swallowed. It wasn't that he hadn’t prepared for it. It was one of the first things on their Multiverse Travel Safety List. Dont expect anything or anyone to be the same, whether that be personality, looks or if someone was even alive at all. Still, hearing his JARVIS speak to him, after so long ….yeah.

The tower looked surprisingly different from his own on the inside. It wasn’t just that the space looked significantly more high tech (no, his ego had totally not taken a hit from that), it was also utterly devoid of, well, people.

Usually a plump blonde woman was sitting at the reception (Susan was her name, looked as if she could not be bothered by a thing in the world, but had several black belts in her repertoire), but instead of her, it was only another Iron Man armor greeting them. As they walked past, it bowed in a small greeting before resuming its task.

It was a marvel to think that it was JARVIS alone controlling all of the suits that were working around them. Then again, maybe he wasn't, perhaps there were other systems laying dormant in the background waiting for instructions before they became active. It would help avoid overloading the system. 

That's how he would do it at least.

The suits that had been escorting them broke away as they entered the elevator, leaving Loki and him alone in the small space. The elevator started moving, number after number flashing on the small screen as it crawled its way up to the highest floor. 

Tony straightened his posture and took a deep breath. This was it, he was about to meet another version of himself and hopefully find the answer he was searching for. 

No, he couldn't just hope , this had to be it.

“You okay?”

Tony looked to the side and found Loki already watching him.

“Yeah, yeah. It's just… a lot, you know.”

“I know.” Loki hummed, giving his arm a comforting squeeze. 

The ride seemed to take both forever and end all too quickly and before Tony knew it, the elevator let out a ding and its doors slid open.

“Cheeseburger?”

Tony's heart jumped in his chest.

It was him . It was without a doubt Anthony Edward Stark staring back at him with a sly grin on his face. 

Only that it was him from a decade ago. Screw it, two decades. Light stubble instead of a beard, full brown hair without any grey streaks having sneaked in and smooth skin with no wrinkles in sight.

Tony took the cheeseburger from the Iron Man armor that was holding it towards him like a peace offering, but he wasn't able to tear his gaze away from the other. Big brown eyes filled with a fascination that he was undoubtedly mirroring.

“Another me...” 

“That’s my line.” Tony said, his lips slowly curling into a grin. It was more than weird to see yourself staring back at you. It was also a bit eerie in a way, as if you were looking at an old picture of yourself without being 100 percent sure that it is actually you. But most of all, it was absolutely fascinating.

“I saw you two tumble through the air so gracefully, I almost thought I'd have to wipe your smears off my windows.” The voice was the same too, a bit more youthful, but undoubtedly the same.

Tony laughed as he started to unwrap the cheeseburger. He wasn't actually hungry, but he wouldn't say no to a good bite. “I'd say a bit of a miscalculation is allowed when you're trying to travel to another universe.”

The other Tony's eyes widened with glee. “So you really are from another dimension? I had my suspicions but, I mean-” He gestured wildly towards Tony. “… wow! ”

“Another universe probably fits it better.” Tony bit into the burger and it tasted just as good as it had looked. “At least according to the multiverse theorem it’s based on.”

The other Tony beamed, clapping his hands in delight. “And you speak English as well! We are going to have so much to talk about.”

“Oh, I bet. Do tell me, how did you manage to-”

Loki cleared his throat, making both of their eyes snap to him.

“Ah, right.” Tony had almost forgotten that Loki was still very much standing behind him. “Uhm, do I need to do introductions here or…?” 

“Don't worry, I am more than familiar.” The other Tony responded, but there was something just too tight about the smile on his face. “Though I do wonder why he isn't wearing any chains.”

Tony stopped halfway into his cheeseburger bite. “Any what?”

“Chains.”

The other Tony's face had slipped into an odd expression. It was a sort of guarded mistrust, though without any hostility in it. Even his posture was still utterly relaxed.

Tony cleared his throat, trying to ease some of that uncomfortable tightness that had sneaked into him. “In our universe he doesn't get any chains. ”

The other him mustered Loki for a long moment and Tony felt like Loki wasn't really helping either with the way his eyes narrowed in distrust. 

“Interesting,” was all the other Tony ended up saying and suddenly, as if the look had been nothing but a fluke of his imagination, it was gone and the friendly grin back in place. “Why don't I take you guys for a tour? I bet you're going to love all the toys I have around.”

Tony threw a quick look over to Loki. He was surprised that he had remained quiet so far, but when he saw Loki give him a small nod, he knew why. Loki was trusting him to make the call.

The comment about the chains had taken him off guard, but it was true that Loki had led an alien invasion against Earth, even if to him, that seemed like nothing but a distant memory by now. How that had played out here however, he couldn't know. So, he also couldn't really blame the other Tony for showing caution. It wasn't as if he had actually tried to put chains on Loki after all.

He eased his expression back into a small smile as he faced the other Tony again. “Sure, we’d love a tour.”

The tower was nothing short of a marvel. The workshop alone stretched over two entire floors, filled to the brim with prototypes and projects and Tony felt right at home in the clattered workbenches and half finished blueprints laying around. It was incredible to talk to someone who just got it , who understood every one of his ideas, who did not ask him to slow down and instead pushed back with just the same amount of ingenuity.

The other Tony toured with them through some labs before finally stepping into a huge hall, the sight of which knocked the air out of Tony’s lungs. There must have been at least 60 Iron Man suits, all lined up in an orderly fashion. Some of them had obvious damage done to them, some even missing entire limbs while others looked fine except for a few scratches on the surface.

“Those are… a lot ,” Tony breathed out, stepping closer to the first suit in the long line. They were all sharing a simple silver color, their design reminding him of the Iron Legion suits he had built long ago, though their blue glowing center was missing.

“Takes a lot to keep the city safe.” The other Tony walked up next to him, his hand stroking across the armor's face in a gentle caress. “It used to be far worse in the beginning, but it's not too bad now.”

“And you're doing all this by yourself?” Loki asked, stepping forward between the two of them. He had occasionally been throwing in some questions, but had mostly remained silent during their tour so far.

“Well, I do have JARVIS, don't I, buddy?”

“Certainly sir,” JARVIS responded and the sound of his voice still had an ache going through Tony's chest.

“Also most of the repair process is automated by now,” the other Tony continued, walking towards the back of the hall where a few huge machines lay dormant. “It's just the more tricky parts that I still do by hand.”

The machine they came to stop in front of looked like a huge version of DUM-E, his little claw scaled to huge proportions. A smile made its way onto Tony's face as he did indeed find a little DUM-E inscription on one of its several pipes.

“All grown up,” Tony murmured to himself.

From the corner of his eye, Tony could tell that the other Tony was watching him, though it was in a bit of an odd way. He turned around and raised a questioning eyebrow. “Something the matter?”

“I hope you don't mind me asking, but…” the other Tony licked his lips, head cocked to the side. “Why do you look so old?”

Loki snorted a laugh next to Tony who sent him a pointed glare. “Shut up, or I'm gonna get you those chains he talked about earlier.”

Loki held up his hands in surrender, but his eyes still crinkled with amusement.

“And as for you-“ Tony turned to face the other him again, finding a grin on his face. “- just wait a few decades and you’ll get those exact same wrinkles. Better take a good look now.”

At that the other Tony’s grin grew, wider and wider until it seemed almost unable to fit onto his face anymore. “Oh, I believe I have aged rather gracefully. I am almost 60 years old after all.”

“What?!” Tony and Loki busted out simultaneously to which the other Tony erupted into laughter.

“There is no way,” Tony said, studying his face. He looked no older than his late twenties, maybe early thirties, but certainly not close to something like sixty. It would mean that he was even a few years older than Tony himself.

“I assume cell regeneration is not yet as advanced in your universe?”

Tony's eyes widened. “We are talking about biological cell regeneration?”

“Well, I am not a cyborg, am I?”

Tony's heart rate picked up until it was beating so fast it was almost starting to hurt. “I don't have much talent in the biological field.”

The other Tony wrinkled his nose. “Can't say it's my favorite either. But necessity does outweigh the personal interests, doesn't it?”

“Why was it necessary?” Loki asked, his voice calm though some of the excitement Tony was feeling was shining through as well.

“Unlike you, us mortals have to actually fight against our biological clock.” There was something there, some kind of history behind the sudden anger in his voice, but Tony was still filled with far too much excitement to care about it. 

Biological cell regeneration. What he had been searching for was right in front of him.

He cleared his throat, bringing the attention back to himself. “So, how did you do it?”

“A lot of trial and error.” The other Tony's eyes still seemed glued to Loki, but at least some of the tension was ebbing away. “Even now, I am the only one the serum worked on.”

“What about those it didn't work on?” Loki threw in.

“Like I said.” The other Tony shrugged. “A lot of trial and error.”

That gave Tony pause, but the other simply rolled his eyes.

“Don't look at me like that. No one was seriously hurt and everyone was more than fairly compensated.”

“In our universe those kinds of things like to go sideways.”

“Oh, I know. But I haven't turned green and angry yet, if that's what you're concerned about,” the other Tony snapped. He had not liked them questioning his intentions, that was for sure. “It isn't about enhancing anything, it's merely about repairing. That includes injuries as much as it includes the process of aging.”

“That's… that's still insane ,” Tony said, excited, yet all too aware of the seriousness of what the other was implying. “Would you be willing to show us?”

At that the other Tony’s expression turned a bit more guarded, though his smile was still kind. “Tomorrow perhaps. It is quite late already after all and there are still a few suits that need to be repaired waiting for me.”

“Of course,” Tony replied with a smile of his own, heart racing in his chest.

During their trip back to the penthouse floor Tony was barely able to contain the excitement that was brimming in him. Loki didn't say anything, but judging by the knowing looks he was giving Tony, he was just as aware of their discovery. 

When they exited the elevator, the other Tony stretched his arms and muffled a yawn. “By the way, I don’t think I have asked yet, what exactly has brought you guys here?” 

It reminded Tony a bit of Natasha, the way he could ask such important questions while showing nothing but utter nonchalance.

“Purely scientific curiosity,” Loki responded, before Tony could do as much as open his mouth.

“Oh, and here I was thinking you guys had intentionally sought me out,” the other Tony said with a small smile, but his eyes didn’t quite smile along. “You are of course free to stay as long as you need. I have more than enough room.”

“Speaking of, where are the others?” Tony asked.

“The others?”

“Yeah, you know, the Avengers…”

Something dark flashed through the other Tony’s eyes. It was brief, but prominent enough that Loki shot him a sideways look.

“It’s a bit more of a one man show at the moment,” He said with a smile that was too tight around the edges.

“Oh, of course. Didn't mean to pry.” Tony tried his best to look convincing as he smiled back. He didn’t know of course, what events had transpired in this universe, how the Sokovia Accords, how Ultron, how Thanos had played out. If at all.

“So, you guys staying the night?”

Tony looked over to Loki and saw the same understanding in his green eyes. “I am sure you do not mind if we speak about it in private for a second.”

“Sure,” the other Tony said and he really didn't sound like he minded it. “I could use a little bathroom break myself. Knock yourselves out.” 

He stalked out of the room and only once he closed the door behind him, did Tony turn to face Loki.

“Why did you-”

Loki put a hand over Tony’s mouth before he could finish his question. With his other hand he made a small gesture, the one he always used when they needed to make sure that their conversation would stay between their ears only.

“You don’t trust him,” Tony stated as the hand finally lowered itself from his mouth and he couldn’t help the slight accusatory tone that slipped into his voice.

“I am not known to trust those I have met less than two hours ago.”

“Loki. He looks like he might have exactly what we need.”

“He also looks like the least trustworthy person I have ever seen.”

Tony scoffed. “What? Because he looks like me?”

“No. Because he doesn’t look enough like you,” Loki shot back, but Tony could tell that it was coming from genuine concern. “There is something off about him.”

“Listen, I get what you're saying, okay?” Tony sucked in a deep breath. He might not be as deceptive as Loki, but he had noticed it too. The much too tight smiles, the way his fingers twitched at times as if he were expecting an attack from them at any moment. “But this might be my last chance and I can't just not take that.”

“I know. But you seemed so eager and...” Loki trailed off, his eyes softening as they flickered across Tony's face “...I just want you to be careful.”

Tony's lips twitched in a small smile. “Am I ever not?”

“Actually, there were several times where you-”

Tony gave Loki’s chest a weak punch. “Oh, shut up. It was a rhetorical question.”

“So, we are staying here for the night?” Loki asked.

“I have to see what this serum thing is all about. I'm not sure if he's going to just share it as willingly as all his robotics blueprints, but we have to get him to cooperate.”

Tony could see the conflict in Loki's eyes, the doubt he still held fighting against the excitement that was bubbling just as much within Tony. But then he let out a sigh and nodded. “Fine.”

Loki flicked with his wrist and with it, the spell that had hidden their words was removed. They walked out the door and almost bumped into the other Tony. He took a quick step back, but it was obvious that he had been trying to eavesdrop.

“The lovers quarrel over?” He asked quickly, as if trying to distract from it.

Tony blinked with wide eyes. “Oh, we are not…” He gestured wildly between him and Loki. “You know…”

“I know…?”

“We are friends is what I’m saying. Right, Loki?”

“Yes.” Loki stated, sounding just as stiff as he looked, standing there as if he was another one of the concrete walls. “We are friends.”

At that, the other Tony raised an amused eyebrow, but most of all he looked… relieved? “Ah, of course. Just friends then.”

Tony decided not to comment on the suggestive tone other than with a quick roll of his eyes. “But hold on, were you really trying to eavesdrop on us?”

The other Tony shrugged. “You cannot blame me for heeding caution. I am inviting you into my home after all.”

Tony's mouth opened and closed. Trust issues were a very universal thing with him, it seemed. “You know what, fair point actually. We would take you up on the offer of spending the night if it still stands. There's probably a lot left to see in this universe.”

“Of course! I haven't even shown you the lower floors yet. You would love some of the toys I have there. And I would love to hear your opinion on the new AI framework I'm working on.”

At his excitement Tony couldn't help but smile. “Let me guess, her name is Friday?”

The other Tony frowned. “Wait, how did you know that?”

Tony sent him a wink. “Oh, she's gonna be a real treat, I'm telling you, you don't wanna live in a universe without her.”

Loki very pointedly cleared his throat behind him. 

“But it seems someone is very eager for his sleep time, so I guess we will talk tomorrow.” Tony said to which the other Tony let out a small laugh.

“Wouldn't want to ruin his beauty sleep.” He said with a wide grin that Loki responded to with a pointed glare. “JARVIS is gonna show you to your rooms. Do let him know if you need anything.”

The rooms they were led to mirrored the ones Tony had in his own tower, even the plasticky looking plants in the corner were the same. Something about that was rather comforting, especially after all the things he had seen today.

“I do believe you have your own room to sleep in,” Tony called to Loki as he let himself fall backwards onto the bed.

“And I believe it would be more than unwise to split up in unknown territory.”

“Unknown territory,” Tony echoed. “We aren't behind enemy lines.”

“Still it's best to heed caution,” Loki said and smoothly sat down next to Tony on the bed. “You remember the spell right?”

“Of course.” 

They had gone over it until Tony could repeat it in his sleep. The spell Loki had woven to send them to this universe could be undone with a pointed shout of Return and they would be right back to their own one. It was the perfect fail safe in case they found themselves in a sticky situation. 

“So, you gonna take the left or the right side of the bed?”

At that Loki's cheeks seemed to take on just a slightly darker tint. “I am fine with the couch for the night.”

Tony snorted a laugh. “I am not going to subject myself to your complaining about back pain all day tomorrow. As long as you don't kick me in your sleep, we are good.”

“Fine then.” 

It was just the tiniest bit adorable how Loki, who always seemed so very sure of himself, still had those issues with intimacy at times. They had been friends for a few years now, ever since the Asgardian rescue ship had landed on Earth, and to Tony it had turned into somewhat of a game to push at the boundaries the other had. However, instead of closing up as Tony had initially thought Loki would, it was with every small push that he opened up more and more to him, showing him who truly laid behind that facade he liked to uphold.

It was just as they had settled into bed, thinking he'd finally get a moment to breathe and think when the lights suddenly started to dim, flickering weakly.

“I'm assuming you're not trying to set the mood right now?” Tony asked with a sigh, pushing himself up out of the bed again.

“Not particularly.” Loki had all but jumped to his feet, every bit of his posture tensing in the way Tony knew from their battles.

The lights continued to flicker, dimming further and further until they suddenly shut off completely, basking the room in an eerie darkness. There was very little light coming in from the windows and a quick look confirmed that the entire block seemed to be experiencing a blackout.

“JARVIS?” Tony called in a hushed whisper, not wanting to make too much noise, but the AI remained silent.

Loki flicked his hand and a small green flame brought a bit more light back into the room. With his head he motioned towards the door and Tony gave him an understanding nod. He put on the repulsor bracelet he had just discarded moments prior and took his place at Loki's side, a well practiced routine after how many battles they had fought together.

Loki pushed the door open and the hallway was just as dark as their room, the only bit of  light coming from the faint emergency lights on the ceiling. Several Iron Man suits were standing around, heads bowed and limbs frozen with not a single sign of life coming from them.

“What the hell…” Tony breathed out and it was in that moment that he noticed the shadowy figure at the end of the hallway. It appeared to freeze as it noticed them, before promptly darting off.

Loki shot him a quick look to which Tony nodded and he was already chasing after it. Tony stayed where he was, eyes scanning the darkness around him for any further movement, muscles tense and repulsor at the ready. Suddenly the sound of hurried steps was coming towards him, but the face accompanying the noise was fortunately very familiar.

“What the hell is going on?” Tony asked as soon as the other Tony was close enough that he didn't have to shout.

“There's been a power cut,” the other Tony gritted out and- wait, was that a gun he was holding in his hands?

“Why are none of the suits working?”

“What exactly do you not understand about a power cut?”

“A power cut , not an EMP, there is no reason why they shouldn't be working.” Tony's eyes scanned across the eerily dead suits surrounding them. “Or is there something wrong with their arc reactors?”

The other Tony frowned. “Arc reactors?”

Tony blinked. “Wait, you don't…” 

It explained the difference in design of the suits, why their blue glowing center was missing.

“I don't what?”

“Your suits run purely on external electricity?”

“Haven't quite managed to bring a fusion reactor into their encasing yet,” the other Tony quipped, but at Tony’s silence, realization quickly gave way to the mockery on his face. His eyes trailed down to the repulsor in Tony's hand before landing back on his face. “But you have.”

The other Tony's eyes widened, an expression washing over his face that was familiar to Tony in the most uncomfortable of ways. It was the one his father had worn when he had designed his first missile at 12, the one Obadiah had worn when he had returned from Afghanistan with a blue heart and now, it was himself looking at him like a thirsty animal that had wandered the desert for days and would not care what it had to do to reach the oasis promised on the horizon.

Luckily Loki appeared in front of them again, hair a bit tousled but otherwise without any signs of fighting having taken place. “Whoever they were, they disappeared.”

Tony's throat was all but dry and when the other Tony didn't respond to Loki either, he narrowed his eyes. “Did something happen?”

The other Tony cleared his throat, putting on a smile that looked genuine for a whole other reason. “No, no, everything is fine here.”

Right after his words, the lights flickered and promptly turned back on again.

“Sir, I could not detect any anomalies in my system, but I would advise on a manual check up.” JARVIS’ sudden voice was uncomfortably loud in Tony's ears.

“Then I better go check that out. You two alright?”

“Yes.” Tony swallowed past the uncomfortable lump in his throat and didn't even bother attempting to smile. “We’ll see you tomorrow,” he choked out, before promptly returning to their room.

“Are you alright?” Loki asked once the other Tony was out of sight.

“Yes. Jolly. Never been better.” Tony paced towards the window, his fingers twitching around the repulsor he was still holding. “So, who was that figure in the hallway?”

Loki's eyes were still narrowed suspiciously, but he didnt pry further. “I didn't catch sight of them but-” Loki pulled a small piece of paper out of his pocket, holding it towards Tony. “They left a note.”

“An address…” Tony mused as he inspected the scribbled words on the page. Neither the writing nor the address itself rang any bells. “You think it's an invitation?”

“Or a trap.”

“I guess we are going to find out tomorrow.” The lights had turned back on outside as well, the city back to its usual glow, though Tony felt like it was nothing more than a facade.

“You're being weird,” Loki noted, slowly walking up next to Tony.

“Well, I just found out that this guy has exactly what we need after looking for it for months. I'm allowed to feel a little nervous about that.” He turned to look at Loki and found him standing closer to him than he had initially thought he would be. He swallowed. “This might be it.”

“Do you think he is just going to give it to us?”

“He didn't really seem apprehensive about sharing, although I think we might have a strong bargain on our side.”

At that Loki frowned. “What do you mean?”

“He doesn't have-” Tony tapped against his chest, the reactor hidden underneath the soft cotton shirt. “- this. His whole operation, his suits, everything, it's all powered through conventional means. You saw how vulnerable he is to something as simple as a damn blackout.”

Loki's eyes widened, briefly flickering down to Tony's chest. “Does he know?”

“I may have let it slip.”

“He is going to take that deal.” Loki's lips curled upward. “And he is going to give us that serum.”

Tony let out a small laugh, but his chest was still too tight for any real joy. “I thought you didn't like the guy?”

“Feelings do not matter in an exchange like this.”

“How eloquently put.” And how easy it was too. Tony stared out the window again. His chest was starting to ache, stronger than usual. Probably because he had pulled out his repulsor.

“You're not quite as enthusiastic as I thought you would be,” Loki murmured and Tony could tell from the corner of his eye that he was watching him.

“Just staying careful. You know.” Tony sent him a small smile. “Taking your advice for once.”

“That is a cause for concern.”

Tony let out a sigh. “Probably.”

It was early morning when they left the tower. They had told the other Tony that they wanted to catch a bit of fresh air and explore the city before delving back into other matters. He had looked a bit hesitant, fingers twitching with impatience and that damned look still in his eyes, but in the end, he had let them go without another word.

It was a comfortably warm spring day, but the streets around them were still uncharacteristically empty. Well, for any other city, they would have been just fine, but this was New York and in New York, you couldn’t just cross a street without risking being run over by a honking taxi driver.

“I never thought I’d say this, but I almost miss the traffic,” Tony mused. His chest still ached a bit, though it felt much better after having caught at least a few hours of sleep.

“I don’t,” Loki replied, his nose wrinkled in disgust. “Those cars have always been a plague in that city. Especially their awful smell.”

“Oh, too stinky for your royal nose?”

Loki shot him an unimpressed look. “Inhaling all those fumes explains why you turned out the way you did.”

Tony grinned. “And yet you ended up at my side.”

Loki rolled his eyes, but the twitch of his mouth betrayed his fondness. “A true tragedy.”

They had followed the address on the little slip of paper to the sight of an apartment building. It looked almost too average, unassuming in a way where one wouldn’t spend a single second looking at it longer when walking past.

“Do we just go in?” Tony asked, mustering the door knob. Its golden color had deteriorated and turned brown where hands must have used it for years.

“I don’t think staring at it is going to do much for us.”

“I swear, if this universe's version of you is just ten percent less annoying, I’m swapping you out.”

At that Loki had the audacity to send him a hurt look. “You wouldn’t.”

“Watch me,” Tony replied and promptly pushed the door open.

It would have looked like any ordinary apartment building from the inside if it weren’t for the utter absence of well, apartments. There was only one long corridor in front of them, a single door at the very end of it.

“At least we won't have to worry about knocking on the wrong door,” Tony mumbled out, walking towards it. 

The entire thing felt like a scene out of a bad horror movie where the protagonists just kept walking towards the very obvious monster and something in him really wanted to just turn around and leave. Probably the rational part of his brain. It rarely did win over his curiosity though.

Loki was close enough behind him that he could feel the heat of his body, no doubt just as prepared for a potential fight as Tony was. They had, after all, still not found out if this had truly been an invitation. Tony grabbed the door handle, breath held and pushed it open.

“I knew you’d come.”

Tony's mouth fell wide open. He was staring at Loki, not the Loki he knew, but Loki nonetheless. The same cheekbones, the same dark curls and most noticeably, the same amused glint shining in his eyes. Sure, his clothes were different, a green coat with fur around its shoulders and golden horns that were much smaller than the ones his Loki wore during battle, but there was no denying it. It was this universe's Loki.

“Holy shit,” Tony breathed out.

The other Loki's lips pulled into a grin, and he was looking at him in sort of a weird way, head tilted, expression oddly soft. “Tony Stark.”

“We are here for a reason, I believe.” Loki stepped forward, ripping Tony out of his trance.

The other Loki raised an amused eyebrow, but his eyes still didn't leave Tony. “That, you are. Follow me.”

He led them through the building, the unassuming corridor quickly turning into the secret facility the building actually appeared to be. It was much larger than it had looked from the outside, the hallways and numerous doors they passed making the place nothing short of a labyrinth.

Tony took the opportunity to look over the other Loki a bit more. He appeared to have a liking for jewelry, golden rings adorning his fingers and ear rings swaying with every step he took. His hair was different too, it looked a lot messier than the slickback look he knew from his Loki. Not necessarily in an unkept way, but more in a Oh my hair styling? I just woke up like this - type of way.

“You should wear earrings too,” Tony mumbled to his own Loki walking next to him.

“And you should learn to keep your mouth shut sometimes.”

“You know that's never gonna happen.”

“As are the earrings.”

The other Loki turned around with a sly grin. “As much as I enjoy you acknowledging my superior fashion choices, we are here.” They had come to halt in front of a huge set of doors that he promptly pushed open.

If Tony had thought seeing another Loki was a lot, what greeted him here, knocked the air out of his lungs. 

Steve, Natasha, Bruce, Stephen, Rhodey, Clint… It was the people that had stood beside him for years, many giving their lives in the battle against Thanos, filling the room that he and Loki entered. His breath hitched as his eyes trailed across them and from the way Loki was tensing next to him, he was most likely just as affected by the sight as he was.

The other Loki took their place among them and it was only once Tony saw that sly grin that he noticed the suspicious, some outright hateful , stares leveled at them from the others.

“You really brought him here.” It was Clint who had spat out the words, his eyes narrowed in anger. Tony was taken back to a certain comment about chains and he felt himself tense.

“You guys left the ominous address with us and we come as a package deal so how about we don't do any of that .” Tony pushed forward, trying to keep his voice as neutral as possible. Yes, Tony Stark could be a diplomat if he wanted to. “I don't know what happened in your universe here, but in ours, Loki isn't-”

“No one was talking about Loki, Stark .” Out of everyone, it was Stephen who had said his name with such disdain that Tony froze. 

They had fought Thanos together, had been prepared to give their life for the time stone and spent weeks aboard a spaceship, slowly traveling back to Earth and bonding in the process. 

He swallowed, trying very hard not to let the pressure in his chest swell. This wasn't his universe, those weren't his friends . Still, it hurt.

Loki pushed himself in front of him, the crackling of angry magic filling the air. “How about we start with some actual talking before anything goes awry, hm?” His voice was so utterly calm that coming from Loki, anyone who knew just the tiniest bit about him knew the threat lying in it.

The others must have thought the same and Tony could see several hands slowly make their way to barely hidden weapons.

Before anything could escalate however, the clacking of shoes announced the arrival of a much different person.

“You guys really weren't overselling it. He looks just like him!” Pepper strode into the room, walking up right in front of them without an ounce of fear. Immediately the atmosphere seemed to lighten, tension easing out of everyone's posture.

“I assume Pepper is the voice of reason in this universe as well?” Tony asked with a sigh of relief.

At that, she smiled, but it was a little sad, that smile. “It's been a long time since someone has called me that. But yes, someone has to keep a leash on all these superpowered idiots. I am the leader of the Underground Avengers after all.”

Tony shook the hand she had stretched out, and Loki followed suit, though he still looked more than weary.

“Let's talk somewhere in private.”

They sat down in a small office like room, lined with dark wooden walls that made the lack of windows even more apparent. Tony wasn't too fond of the claustrophobic feeling it evoked.

“So, what was the invitation for?” Loki asked. He still had a protective tone to himself that made Tony both want to roll his eyes and sent an odd bit of warmth into his stomach that he really didn't have time to analyze further.

“You are another universe’s Loki and Tony Stark, correct?” Pepper asked in the curt, but friendly tone Tony had heard so often from her when dealing with Stark Industries business meetings.

“You would be correct in that assumption,” Loki responded, tone just as level.

“We contacted you to warn you about our Tony Stark.”

“Warn us?” Tony raised a questioning eyebrow.

“Yes. I do not know what he has told you, but his intentions are far from the noble heroic ways he may have once been following.” There was more to her words, Tony could tell in her calculating eyes. She was trying to figure out if the same was true for him as well. “He thinks he's protecting this world, this city.”

“Well, there is a lot less traffic,” Tony said, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

“And why do you think that is?” Pepper immediately shot back. “It's because anyone who wasn't satisfied with the way he does things has left and anyone that dares to oppose him nowadays gets a taste of the constant surveillance of his suits flying around.” She paused briefly and cleared her throat, as if trying to hide how much she had been riled up. “It's the reason why we, the ones he once fought side by side with, are forced to operate in secrecy.”

“What happened that it came to this?” Loki asked. Comfortably leaned back in his chair, legs spread, he couldn't have looked more confident. At least one of them was holding up facades properly, Tony thought with a bitter note at the way his own body had tensed.

“We all stood by his side once. He had been the one playing the biggest role in defeating Thanos and there was never any reason for concern when he told us that he intended to turn the world into a safer place.” She paused briefly, nostalgia clinging to her voice. “ If we cannot fend off three Thanos’ at once, then we have learned nothing, is what he always said. But his initial desire to protect quickly turned into one to control and now he controls more than just the city. His money funds politicians and influences decisions all over the world. He is the puppeteer.” Pepper's voice may have remained calm, but her eyes were filled with a cold, hard anger. “The only reason he hasn't yet turned Earth into Stark Planet is because he's lacking the energy to do so.”

“The energy?” Loki asked. Tony should probably be asking his own questions, but he couldn't quite bring himself to focus. 

A suit of armor around the world. His once dream had become the nightmare of this universe.

“Has he not told you?”

“Not that I would recall.” Loki glanced over to him to which Tony too gave a shake of his head.

“There is simply not enough energy for all of the suits he has. They are spread all over the country, operating 24/7 and while he does have the money, at some point there is just nothing left. Especially not in the masses he needs it.” Pepper was flicking a pen back and forth between her fingers. Tony knew the gesture as an attempt to conceal her real tension from his own Pepper. “It's one of the biggest things holding him back still.”

Tony swallowed. If what Pepper was telling them was true, this universe's Tony Stark was nothing short of a villain .

“So what exactly is it that you want to tell us?” Loki asked, voice giving away nothing of what he was thinking.

“I am merely warning you. Of him.” She paused briefly. “Of us. Should you want to align yourself with him.”

Tony cleared his throat, shifting in his chair. “We usually don't stand on the same side as the manic tech conglomerates. Was kind of the whole point of why I shut my weapons manufacturing down.”

At that Peppers eyes widened in surprise and Tony slowly nodded as yet another puzzle piece fell into place. “But let me guess, he hasn't?”

“His weapons are the reason why he is the man he currently is. After all, his armors are the greatest weapons of all.”

Tony bit his lip before he could have said how the suit was something very different from a missile. It may be true for him. But it didn't appear to be for this Tony.

“Well, thanks for the warning, but you don't have to worry. We didn't really come here with the intention of letting some maniac ascend to godhood.” Tony was half way to standing up already. He wanted out of this suffocating office, away from those judging eyes of a Pepper that wasn't his. 

“Speaking off, why did you two come to this universe?”

“It was just a spell gone wrong, we will be back to our own in no time. Don't worry.” Loki's smooth voice responded.

“Then I hope your curiosity has been sated.” She smiled, but mistrust was still shining in her eyes.

“Very much so.” Loki mirrored her look perfectly. “We will take our leave now, if there is nothing else to discuss.”

The trip outside was a blur and Tony wasn't sure if someone else was with them or if it was just Loki's warm hands that were holding his shoulders and guiding him outside. He welcomed the fresh air into his lungs with a deep breath, but it didn't quite ease the tightness in his chest.

“God.” Tony ran a hand through his hair and wished he could rip it straight out. “Why can nothing ever be simple?”

Loki hummed. “Important things rarely are.”

“Oh, nice. Another calendar quote from you. Certainly helping right now.” Tony snapped.

“Tony. I didn't mean it like-”

“I know. Fuck, I know. But come on.” Tony looked at him and he knew he must have made for quite the pathetic sight by the way Loki's eyes softened. “The one guy that can save me is apparently this world's evil tech dictator. Oh and he's also another version of me! How very comforting.”

Tony wished the ground would just open up and swallow him whole. His chest appeared to have much the same wish as it suddenly flared up with pain, sending him stumbling onto his knees.

“Tony?” Loki asked, voice filled with panic.

“Fuck, I just… just need a second.” 

The deeper he tried to breathe the stronger his chest ached, leaving him with a shallow panting that did little to ease the pain. He must be making for quite the pathetic sight, kneeling on the sidewalk with his head bowed and hand clutching at his shirt.

“You hadn't told me it was this bad.” Loki crouched down next to him, eyes searching his face as if there was some kind of solution to their problem in it.

“What part of 'Im dying' wasn't clear enough?” Tony tried to keep his tone light, but through the pain it came out as the choked panic it actually stemmed from.

“I just didn't…”

“Didn't think the mortal would crumble that quickly?” Panic was aching in his chest as much as the pain was. 

He had not allowed anyone to see him like this. It was easy to tell someone Hey, I'm dying but don't worry, I'll find a cure for sure , but truly admitting to the process, showing just how low he had gotten... It was intimate. It was scary.

“Tony. Don't joke about this.”

“A dying man can joke about whatever he wants,” Tony grumbled to himself. 

The pain was slowly ebbing away, receding to the background throb he was used to living with by now. Only once he could finally take a deeper breath did he notice the warm hand on his back, rubbing in a gentle, comforting motion. 

“Better?” Loki asked, his eyes swimming with concern as they searched his face.

Tony simply nodded and allowed Loki to pull him back to his feet. The hand on his back didn't wander far however, holding onto him as if afraid he might collapse again any moment.

“I can walk on my own, you know,” he said quietly. Now that he didn't feel like he was about to die on a random sidewalk, the embarrassment started to take over.

“Be silent or I'm going to carry you instead.” Tony had rarely heard Loki's voice be this heavy, filled with so much pained, raw emotion. He swallowed and allowed Loki's help without any further protest. “I'm assuming you aren't too keen on going back to the tower?”

Tony let out a sigh. “You would assume right.” 

Chapter Text

“Where did you even get the money from to pay for this?” Tony asked as he sat down on the bed in their hotel room. He had just taken a shower and felt at least a bit better about his pathetic display earlier.

“A simple relocation spell,” Loki said with a grin. “It appears the receptionist was so generous as to be the one paying for our room.”

Tony snorted out a small laugh. Their room was rather nice, nothing too fancy, but it did have two comfortable beds and a big bathroom. He leaned back, letting the soft mattress take his weight.

What would the other Tony think once he realized that they wouldn't return back to the tower? Would he be angry? Confused? Was he already searching the city for them with the controlling obsession that Pepper had described him with?

“Loki?” His voice sounded uncomfortably quiet.

“Yes?”

“Maybe we should just leave.”

There was a rustling of sheets as Loki must have turned to look at him. Tony couldn't really tell from where he was staring at the ceiling. 

“You can’t be serious, Tony.”

“We can find somewhere else. Some other universe, another me, anything . Maybe I just need to lock myself in the lab for a few weeks, explore some other possibilities.” He had done exactly that already and Loki knew it too. He had been there after all, by his side every time Tony had found some new hope to clutch onto, only to be inevitably disappointed once again.

“Tony…” Loki's voice was soft and his eyes looked so pained that Tony couldn’t stand to look at them.

“Please, I can't give him this.” He clutched at his chest, feeling the hard edges of the arc reactor under his soft cotton shirt. It was his greatest creation, the one that had saved his life and was now on the path to take it right back. He sucked in a deep breath, trying to ease the feeling of tightness around it.

“He has the solution.”

“Fuck, I know, but I don’t want to think about what he might do with what I can give him.”

“He wants to protect the world,” Loki stated, but he sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to convince Tony.

“His idea of protecting is screwed up and you know it.”

Loki narrowed his eyes and there was something accusing about the glare he sent him. “You’re just going to let this opportunity slip from your fingers?”

Tony leaned forward and rested his head in his hands. He knew, of course he knew. It was his chance to save himself. Maybe it would only delay the inevitable if he didn’t give the arc reactor to the other Tony. Who's to say that he wouldn’t just develop one on his own? He had managed to after all.

But Tony couldn’t.

It wouldn’t be the Palladium killing him if he handed over the arc reactor. 

It would be the guilt.

Loki started pacing the room, slowly shaking his head at Tony’s refusal. “We disappear right after the exchange, we never have to see any of this world again. We can pretend it doesn’t exist.”

“Yeah, but pretending isn’t the same as knowing, is it?”

Loki’s jaw clenched in anger, but before he could have said something, Tony continued talking. 

“He is going to destroy this world in his quest to protect it. Until it's just him and his suits left, don’t you fucking realize that?”

“So what?” Loki spat out after a moment of silence.

“So what?” Tony echoed in disbelief.

“So what if he destroys this world?” Loki stated, trying so hard to keep his voice level and utterly failing at it. “I'd rather see this entire universe crumble than be forced to watch you die.” 

There was so much desperation and hurt glistening in those green eyes, but there was also something else. Something much softer, something that not only ran much deeper than any of those other emotions, but was also familiar to Tony. It was the look Loki had when he brought Tony his morning coffee, when he dragged him out of his workshop after Tony had once again forgotten the time and only realized how tired he truly was when he had to lean against Loki's side not to fall asleep right where he was standing.

He had never really been able to place it. Not until now.

“You’re…“ Tony trailed off as the realization hit him.

Loki scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Did you really think I'd go as far as traveling to another universe because we are friends?”

It was, in fact, exactly what Tony had thought. Loki kept looking at him, clearly waiting for a response, but Tony was for once in his life absolutely speechless. How hadn't he noticed earlier? It was staring right at him, Loki's expression giving away every bit of what he was feeling.

“Listen, Tony.” Loki said, breaking the silence. His voice was impossibly soft. “I don't care if you feel the same way, but I am not going to let you die.” He sucked in a sharp breath, turning his head to look out the window. “You're all I have left.”

Tony wanted to argue that he had much more left. That he had Thor and the other Asgardians and… other things. But Tony also knew that Loki didn’t quite feel like he belonged among them, he had told him so himself after all. It had been during one of those nights where they had shared one too many drinks, when tight mouths had become much looser and secrets the currency of trust.

Tony swallowed, but the lump in his throat did not ease. "I'm sorry. I… I didn't know.”

Loki rolled his eyes, but he didn't even look dejected. He just seemed tired. “I'm going to take a shower. But this conversation is not over yet.” Loki was undoubtedly talking about the serum, but all Tony could think about was a much different revelation.

It must have been late already, but Tony didn't really feel tired. They had both laid down in their respective beds after having mumbled a more than tense goodnight to the other and then, nothing else.

He turned to the side and looked at Loki’s side profile, faintly illuminated by the light falling through the window. His eyes were closed, dark eyelashes resting on pale skin, but Tony knew that he wasn’t asleep.

“So, you have a crush on me, huh?”

“Shut up,” came the murmured response.

“Would watch an entire universe fall for me.”

Loki turned to look at him with a sigh. “I am starting to reconsider my choices.”

Tony had been the one to never really consider it before. There had been so much fighting and Thanos and Thanos again and then he had sort of started dying. There hadn’t been an opportunity to breathe , to think about the way Loki had been there by his side the entire time ever since the Asgardian spaceship had landed on Earth, bearing the news of Thanos' incoming war. He hadn’t considered what it had meant that Loki had never disappeared as Thor had said he would, that Loki had been the only one whom Tony had trusted to tell about his impending doom.

“You’re staring,” Loki murmured.

“I don’t think you mind.”

“I don’t.”

They continued looking at each other in silence, Loki’s eyes glistening, so bright in the dimly lit room that Tony couldn’t really focus on anything else. Not that he wanted to. 

What was it that he wanted? Not to die was certainly on the very top in bold red letters, but what came after that? 

“What are you doing?”

Loki frowned as Tony got up from his own bed to instead lay down next to Loki, but he did make space for him.

“Just staring from a bit more up close.”

Tony wasn't wearing a shirt and the reactor illuminated Loki's face in a faint blue glow. He could count every single one of Loki's eyelashes like this. He could see the faint laugh lines marking his face, could see the lips that were slightly parted as if there was a silent gasp caught in Loki's throat.

Tony reached out his hand, but before he could have put it on Loki's cheek as he had intended to, Loki stopped him.

“Tony.” His voice was low and raspy. “You don't have to do this out of some misplaced pity. I will be fine.” 

Tony furrowed his eyebrows. “This isn't pity.” He wasn't quite sure what exactly it was. He had never been good at the whole thinking-about-emotions thing, he just did what felt right.

And this, laying across from Loki, allowing their breaths to mix…it felt damn right.

“Then are you saying…'' Loki looked so damned hopeful and it sent an ache through Tony's chest.

“I don’t know how much time I have left and-” Tony put his finger over Loki’s mouth that had already opened in protest. “No, you listen. I don’t want to promise you anything when I cannot even promise that this might last, but…” Tony trailed off, licking his lips.

“But?”

“But maybe I don't want to think about that.” Tony swallowed. “Maybe I want to be selfish. Even if it's just tonight.”

A small smile twitched at the corner of Loki’s mouth, but his eyes were still filled with so much sadness. His mouth was opening again, no doubt wanting to protest the finality of Tony’s words, but Tony had enough.

He simply leaned forward and kissed him before a single sound could have left Loki's lips. 

For a short moment Loki was all but frozen, a small surprised noise coming from the back of his throat. Worry washed over Tony, thinking he may have misinterpreted the situation after all, but then Loki's hand sneaked around his neck, angling his head and kissing him back with all the desperation Tony felt.

It was messy, teeth biting into tender lips, nails scraping across skin and fingers pulling at hair and yet, it was exactly what Tony wanted. No, screw it. It was what he needed . He needed to taste Loki on his tongue, needed to feel his heart beating against his own rotting one as he pressed himself as close as he could against him.

The cool sensation of Loki's skin, the warmth curling in Tony's stomach, the pain where Loki's grip on him was just too tight. All of it was the last reminder of his living, the proof that he was still here.

Tony kissed him with all the desperation of the dying man he was and Loki was returning with much the same eagerness, his hands exploring every bit Tony was willing to offer.

And even if it wasn't much, Tony offered him everything he had left to give.

Something within Tony twisted with the knowledge that he could have had this sooner, if only he had noticed, if he hadn't been so caught up in everything else. 

But now, he was merely allowed a glimpse of what could have been.

Tony had to pull away to breathe, but he didn't want to, wanted to stay as close to Loki as he possibly could and never have to be anywhere else again. He opted to instead press his face into the crook of his neck, arms tightening their hold around Loki as he caught his breath.

“Tony?” Loki sounded a bit breathless himself.

Tony hadn't really noticed that tears had begun to prickle in the corners of his eyes and he pressed himself even closer, wishing he could hide them from the world.

“Tony, what's going on?” Loki's voice was laced with concern and he tried to pull away, but Tony didn't let him.

“I don't want to die.” Tony sucked in a shuddering breath, the confession he had denied himself for so long pouring out of him. “I don't want to die, Loki.”

No matter what others might claim about him, he had been ready to sacrifice his life numerous times without thinking twice about it, as long as it meant he was doing it for humanity, for good . 

But dying now? It was a painful, merciless process with no point to it. And it was terrifying, to feel it creeping up on him, coming closer and closer every day until it no longer mattered how much he lied to himself about it.

Death was inescapable and he was scared of it.

Maybe the tears running down his face made him a coward. Maybe it was only natural.

“Hey, it's okay.” It wasn't okay. They both knew that. Loki's voice was far too heavy to be convincing, but the kiss he pressed against Tony's forehead was so soft and sweet and Tony let himself be lulled by it. "It's okay.”

Tony kissed him, tasting the salt of his own tears on Loki's tongue. He held him close and let Loki whisper sweet nothings against his mouth and Tony believed every lie he offered him.

Even if it was only for tonight.

In the morning Tony felt both worse and better than he had in a while. His eyes were swollen and heavy and even the shower he had just taken helped little with his appearance. The damn lines on his chest had grown, spreading from the arc reactor like the poisonous vines his own veins had turned into.

Loki's arms were warm as they hugged him from behind. Tony watched in the mirror's reflection as they ghosted over his chest, pressing against his heart as if the dark lines marking it weren't even there.

“There's not much time left,” Tony murmured.

Loki only hummed in response, his arms tightening their hold around him. “I’ll get us breakfast.”

Tony laid back down on the bed as soon as Loki had left, staring at the ceiling. The doctor had given him a few months. He had given it to him with an apologetic, almost scared smile, as if he feared the messenger would be killed for his tidings. Tony hadn’t really believed it. He had laughed and said, ‘ Sure, bud,’ and walked out of the doctor's office as if nothing had happened. 

He was Tony Stark after all.

And maybe that had been the reason why he had allowed it to come so far in the first place. Anyone with more than one brain cell (and Tony had plenty) would have known that an electromagnet in the chest to halt the shrapnel piercing his heart should be a short term solution at best, that it couldn’t possibly be good for his health in the long run.

But Tony had ignored it in the same way one with back pain would slouch in their chair and only correct their posture once their nine hour shift was already over. 

Only at this point, there was nothing to correct left within him anymore.

A knock on the door ripped him out of his thoughts and he cleared his throat, trying to ease some of the scratchiness.

“Yes?”

“It’s me. I forgot to take the keycard with me,” Loki called, his voice muffled through the closed door.

“And I even reminded you.” Tony got up from the bed, doing a short stretch before he padded over to the door.

The fact that there was no grumbled response coming back from Loki should have been the first sign that something was amiss. As soon as Tony opened the door, he was flung back into the room and before he even knew what had happened, he was pressed back onto the bed, both his wrists held tightly together and body pinned down by the other's weight.

“Tony Stark,” the voice from the Loki hovering above him spat out. It was Loki, sure, but it wasn’t his Loki.

Tony's heart jumped in his chest, but he forced a grin onto his face. “Not that I mind this position, but I don’t think my Loki is too keen on sharing me, I apologize.”

“I do not care what this copy of mine thinks.” Loki’s eyes flickered down to his chest and Tony really wished he had put on a shirt. “Do you plan on giving him your arc reactor?”

There was no doubt about who he meant with him . At least he got right to the point. 

“I don’t know. Which answer is the one that won’t get me killed right now?”

At that, an equal amount of annoyance and surprisingly, an odd fondness passed through the other Loki’s face. “You really do babble just like him.”

“Is that a compliment or an insult? I can’t quite tell.”

He was pressed further against the mattress, the pressure just enough that the next breath he sucked in had pain flaring in his chest. 

“I asked a question.”

“And I was buying time.”

Tony promptly kicked him in the stomach, right as his Loki grabbed him by the nape and flung him backwards. There was a flurry of blows exchanged that Tony didn’t quite catch, too busy with trying to ease the tightness in his chest now that the weight on top of him was finally gone.

A loud grunt of pain came from the Lokis, indiscernible who it had stemmed from, but then a blast of magic sent the other Loki into the wall, green vines curling around his limbs and holding him firmly in place. 

After reassuring himself that they would indeed hold, Loki turned towards Tony, concern fluttering across his face. “Are you okay?”

“Not much worse than before.” As soon as those words left him, Tony was thrown into a coughing fit, every wheezing breath wrecking through his body and burning in his lungs. Loki's hand was on his back, but there was nothing he could do to help him other than be there until it eventually ebbed away.

The other Loki had watched him with a small frown, but at the sight of the blood that clung to Tony's hand, realization washed over his face.

“You’re dying.”

“No shit Sherlock.” “No, he’s not!”

Loki and Tony both shot back at the same time, earning a raised eyebrow from the bound Loki on the wall.

“That’s why you came here,” he continued, green eyes glistening as he slowly nodded. “You seek to stop the decay.”

“Decaying sounds even worse than dying.” Tony winced. “I’m not a fruit.”

The other Loki’s eyes trailed over to Loki, a frown on his face. “But if saving his life is all you desire, why go to such lengths? An apple is all he would need.”

At that, Loki tensed next to him and his voice was carefully controlled when he spoke again. “In our universe Idunn's orchard is no more. As is Asgard.”

“How?”

“Ragnarok has occurred.”

There was a heavy moment of silence, a shared understanding passing between their eyes.

“Did we…”

“Yes.” The other Loki all but flinched at the response. “But it wasn’t what you think. Bringing about Ragnarok was the only way to ensure that the Asgardians could survive.”

“I see,” the other Loki simply said, but there was something heavy, grief stricken in his expression that he wasn't able to hide.

“Wait,” Loki suddenly said, breaking the brief silence. “If Asgard still exists in this universe, then does that mean…”

It was almost a bit terrifying, the way they both suddenly beamed at each other, the tension between them fading away so quickly as if the other Loki had not just threatened Tony's life moments prior.

“Do we have a deal?” The Loki pinned to the wall asked.

“Deal,” Loki responded with a nod.

Tony pointedly cleared his throat. “Okay, does someone want to fill me in on this apple business? Since I’m kind of the star of the show here?”

“The apples of Idunn grant those who consume them the longevity and health of an Aesir.” Loki explained and with a flick of his hand, the vines holding the other Loki in place disappeared. “They grow only on Asgard which in our universe had been destroyed during Ragnarok. Here however…”

“You’re saying they could fix this?” Tony tapped against his chest.

The Lokis gave him a synchronized nod that would have been cute, if Tony wasn’t much more distracted by that other revelation. 

Hope was dangerous. Hope made his heart race and had him ignore all the many times it had tricked him before, but right now, Tony was filled to the brim with it.

“How long until you can get one of those apples?” Tony asked the other Loki, voice filled with eagerness.

“I will have it by tonight. Perhaps even earlier if everything goes perfectly smooth.”

“And what is it that you want in return?” Loki asked. 

The other Loki grinned. “I really do know myself, don't I?” He held his hands forward, turning to face Tony. “I want you to remove these.”

With a shimmer of magic, there were suddenly two chains coming into view. They were delicate enough that one might almost pass them off as simple bracelets, if not for the way they appeared to be just a bit too tight around the wrists.

“What do those do?” Tony asked, eyes flickering over the complicated mechanism their ends were attached to.

“They suppress your magic,” his own Loki said, walking closer to inspect them just as Tony was doing.

“Yes. They do not rid me completely of it, but they do prevent me from casting any stronger spells.” The other Loki smiled, but there was sadness hanging in every corner of his face. “Especially against a certain someone.”

“ He did this to you.” Loki concluded, the disgust evident in his voice. Tony knew that to Loki, his magic was like an extension of himself, to rid him of it was one of the worst things someone could do to him. 

“He did,” the other Loki replied in a somber tone.

“Are you planning to kill him for it?”

A sudden anger boiled in the other Loki's eyes. “Don't suggest such ridiculous things,” he snapped.

“Doesn't sound all that ridiculous considering what he's doing to this universe.” Tony chimed in.

“You will not bring any harm to him.” 

“Or what?”

“Or you wont make it back to your own universe in one piece.”

Tony blinked and shared a quick look of surprise with Loki.

“You still feel something for him,” Loki stated, having reached the same conclusion as Tony.

The other Loki looked to the side and swallowed heavily. “When my mind had been poisoned by Thanos and I led an invasion against this planet, he had been there to pull me out of it. It is only fair I do the same for him. Giving him one of those…” Loki gestured to the arc reactor in Tony's chest and he was once again reminded that he still hadn’t put a shirt on. “It would throw him into an abyss he could never escape from.”

“You think there is still hope for him?” Tony asked wearily. This world’s Avengers had talked as if the other version of him was gone, corrupted to his very core.

“He is a prisoner of his own fears, no matter how much he might pretend he isn’t. The others believe his own youthfulness is nothing but a result of his vanity, but I was there.” There was something desperate in Loki's voice as he went onto his rant, something guilty. “I saw the fear in his eyes as he believed there would never be another to keep this damned planet safe. He thinks it's his burden to be its protector. Forever.”

Well, didn't that hit home. Tony took in a deep breath, trying very hard not to let the parallels bring his crumbling sanity even further down.

“Okay, I'm gonna need some tools to remove those.” He motioned towards the chains around Loki's wrists. Focus on work, lamenting over the fact that he understood, knew exactly what the other Tony was feeling, would not help him with his quest of not dying. “Also it's probably gonna take a little while to figure out the mechanism, so the earlier I can get started the better.”

“I do need to leave for Asgard immediately if you want the apple by this evening.”

“Is there maybe another pair of those that aren't attached to your wrists?” Tony asked. “Once I figure out the overall mechanism, removing them should be the easiest part.”

The other Loki seemed to think for a moment before wrinkling his nose. “There is a certain second grade sorcerer who received much the same treatment.”

“Oh my…” Tony knew exactly who he meant.

“Tony Stark."

“That is what my dear ma called me. But the not evil version, let’s not forget that, hm Stephen?”

“I would prefer Strange.” Stephen narrowed his eyes. “Perhaps even Doctor Strange, when it comes to you.”

“And I would prefer to sit at a beach and get a tan instead of having to worry about the mind numbing feeling of those that I would call my friends, hating my guts in this universe, but here we are!”

The corner of Stephen’s mouth twitched and Tony couldn't quite tell if it was from annoyance or amusement. Probably a mix of both.

After Stephen had sat down, Tony got to work inspecting the small chains. They looked exactly like the ones he had seen around the other Loki's wrists and he couldn't deny that there was something fascinating about the intricate mechanism he slowly uncovered, especially considering it was put into such a small device. He took a small screwdriver and lifted off some of the outer encasings, allowing him to inspect the unveiled machinery inside, but something about it made him frown.

“Those are designed to be taken off again,” Tony realized. The lock itself was a construct of several electrical currents of varying intensity, but there was a small gap where something not unlike a matching key could have been inserted. 

“You’re saying he didn't intend for them to be permanent?” Stephen asked, an eyebrow raised in disbelief.

“The design suggests it. But most importantly I am saying that I can get these open.”

Stephen gave him a small nod. “Get to work then.”

As if he wasn't already. But Tony bit his tongue for now and did exactly that. While he had denied the other Loki's offer to go to one of the Underground Avengers’ supposedly built out labs (he really wasn't too fond of walking into their secret base again), they had provided a more than decent tool kit for him to work with.

“Have you not had anyone else check them?” Tony asked as he started rummaging through the tools, trying to find things that would help him with disrupting the electrical flow.

“Oh, I did. Plenty of people. Though it seems you are unfortunately quite the best in your field,” Stephen admitted reluctantly, which brought a grin to Tony's face.

“I'll just pretend I didn't hear the obvious disdain and take the compliment,” Tony said before getting back to work. Loki had enchanted one of the small hotel lamps and it was now serving as a proper light source for him to work with.

The god himself was still hovering rather ominously next to one of the windows like an overprotective bodyguard, occasionally sending glares towards the cloak of levitation that was wrapped around Stephen's shoulders. The fact that his contempt for the sentient cloth transcended even universes was rather amusing.

Tony really wanted to focus on the work but he could feel the burning intensity of Stephen's eyes on him. He scratched at the dark lines that had begun to sneak up on his neck, wishing he could somehow hide them.

“Why did you let it get this far?” Stephen asked. 

The other Loki must have filled him in, Tony realized, and while it was to be expected, he still didn't like the thought of his dying process being talked about behind his back.

“Oh, I don't know. Was kind of a lot more busy with trying to save the world than care about the occasional chest pain,” he quipped, trying his best to stay focused on the chains in front of him. He had just found the perfectly sized metal wire that could serve as a temporary conductor.

“You are similar to him,” Stephen stated.

Tony shot him a look. “I don't think that's a compliment.”

“Not anymore. But he did once believe he was doing the right thing.”

“And what changed?” They had of course gotten Pepper's version before, but Tony was intrigued to hear what Stephen would say.

“It was when Thanos came… and Loki left.”

“He left?” Loki asked from his place leaned against the windowsill.

“Well, I would say he ran and hid like the coward he is, but…” Stephen’s eyes trailed over to him and he shrugged. “I know there was more to it. It was the fear that ended up driving him away.”

“I would never-” Loki immediately started to protest.

“Honey. Not talking about you,” Tony interrupted him and allowed himself to revel at the faint blush that crept onto Loki's cheeks at the nickname.

Stephen looked amused, but he didn't show it with more than a raised eyebrow. “It would be easy to point fingers, but Tony had been spiraling for a long time. It was just the final push to send him over the edge.”

“Do you think there's still hope for him?” Tony asked after a moment of silence.

“Nothing is ever truly lost,” Stephen said in that authoritative tone that Tony both hated and yet, it felt so oddly comforting coming from him. “But only time will tell.”

Tony continued working in silence after that. Work had always been good at keeping his mind at bay, and he was more than glad for the distraction it offered. It wasn't easy, but after some time he finally found a weak spot in the chain's design, allowing him to imitate the supposed key to them by disrupting the electrical currents with just the right amount of power. Now, he just had to slide the thin metal wire into the perfect spot, apply the right part of pressure on the outside and- Tadaa , the lock clicked open.

“Any standing ovations?” Tony asked with a wide grin as he held up the now open chain in his hands.

“I am already standing,” Loki pointed out.

“You told me to keep still,” Stephen added with a nod, but his eyes gave his excitement away.

“God, you two truly are insufferable in every universe,” Tony mumbled to himself and promptly got to work on the second pair of chains. Now that he had figured out how to get them open, the second one took barely half the time and soon, Stephen was rubbing his two chain free wrists.

“Thank you,” he said, and he truly sounded like he meant it.

Tony shot him a wink and gave the smallest bow. “The good version of Tony Stark, at your service.”

Stephen stayed for a while longer after that. Tony appeared to have been able to lift some of his suspicion and without it, the other reminded him all too much of the Stephen he knew. 

It was nice to talk about what had transpired in this universe, to talk about the differences and similarities without quite as much of a looming disaster cloud hanging over their heads. Even Loki joined in their discussion at some point. Or maybe he just hadn't been able to resist the smell of the hot dogs that Stephen had conjured up. His face had shone with sheer delight as he had pulled out his sling ring and summoned his magic. It had been almost 3 months since those chains had been put on him after all.

And then, in the evening, just as he had promised, the other Loki appeared again, a small brown leather bag in his hand and a more than cocky grin on his face.

“Apple delivery?”

Loki had immediately tried to snatch it out of his hand, but the other Loki flicked his wrist and the brown leather bag the apple was presumably stored in, disappeared into that pocket dimension of his that Tony knew all too well.

“In due time.” He held his wrists forward. “But first, these .”

Tony immediately got to work on the chains and the first one clicked open within a matter of minutes. Knowing that the cure he had been desperately searching for was within his reach was a pretty damn good motivator. And he was also still a genius, of course.

It was when he got to the second chain, encasing just lifted and eyes scanning for the weak spot he had found in the other one, that all hell broke loose. Really, he should have seen it coming with how suspiciously smooth it had all gone until now.

A loud explosion cut through the air and suddenly the entire window front was busted open, sending them reeling to the ground. Tony groaned as he held his throbbing head. He must have been thrown against the concrete wall, judging by the pain and his position at the very back of the room.

“Tony? Tony!” 

Tony hadn't even noticed that his ears were ringing, not until it slowly subsided to the sound of Loki's frantic voice.

“I'm okay. I'm okay,” he reassured, letting himself be pulled back to his feet. Several spots (and a painfully familiar one) ached with the movement, but he grit his teeth not to show it.

“And here I was thinking my dear guests might have gotten lost.” The other Tony was hovering in the air outside, wearing one of his suits while being flanked by an entire army of them on both sides. He curled his fingers in a small wave and smiled. “Here to take you back home.”

A repulsor blast was being shot at Tony without another warning, but before it could have even come close, it was redirected by an orange portal, landing on one of the nearby hovering suits instead.

“They are in much better company now.” Stephen stepped forward, the orange glow of his magic filling the room.

“Stephen,” the other Tony said, something cold and dejected in his tone. “I see your leash has come off.”

The Iron Man suits on his sides raised their arms and the whirring of the repulsors left no doubt about what he was going to do.

“Get his chains off, I will protect you,” Stephen called towards Tony, his posture taking on a defensive stance.

“That is my job,” Loki barked out, taking a stand at his side and while Tony wanted to say that this really wasn't the time to get jealous, the suddenly erupting fight sort of took priority.

He quickly gathered the dropped tools from where they had fallen to the ground and darted over to where the other Loki was just now coming out of his daze after his involuntary meeting with the wall.

“Rudolph, could really use that apple soon before a repulsor blast speeds up my dying process even more.”

With a small shake of his head, the other Loki’s eyes returned to their usual clarity. “We have a deal. Get those chains off and the apple is yours.” He shoved his chained wrist towards him. “As promised.”

Oh, he really hoped that to this universe's Loki, a promise meant as much as it did to his own. Not that he could really do anything if he were to betray them.

Trying to fiddle open the tiny mechanism proved to be a lot harder with repulsor blasts being shot at them and blows being exchanged that had the entire building shake under their feet.

Loki and Stephen were holding their own, the air alight with the burning power of their magic, but the other Tony had strength in sheer numbers with his army of suits around him. On more than one occasion Tony twitched with the need to jump in and help them, even if he had nothing but a single repulsor wristband with him.

The Loki in front of him appeared to be sharing the sentiment, his hands having balled into tight fists and his eyes focused on the fight around them.

“I almost have it open,” Tony reminded him. “Just hold still for one more second.” He pushed against the structural weak point, fingers straining under the pressure, but then, he finally heard that satisfying clicking noise. He allowed himself a small grin. “You better have the apple ready.”

The chain fell to the ground and Loki took in a deep breath, his eyes seeming to glow with the power that was once again his own. His lips curled into a smile and with a flick of his wrist, the bag containing the apple appeared.

“As promised.” He held it towards Tony and Tony was just about to grab it when it was suddenly all but shot out of his hand, tumbling to the ground and rolling a few meters away.

“That something important?” The other Tony smiled at him. A cold, dejected grimace of a smile. 

Behind him Loki and Stephen were trying to break free of the grasp of several suits crowding them. Tony caught onto desperate green eyes and he was about to jump in and help when he realized that Loki was trying to tell him something else. Tony swallowed and gave him a quick nod in understanding.

“Tony!” The other Loki hissed, pushing forward without an ounce of fear. “Will you stop already?”

“Stop? Yes, of course I will stop! I will just stop and abandon everything and run away like some coward,” the other Tony spat out, his eyes narrowing in anger. “I will run like you did.”

The other Loki scoffed, the same agitation mirrored in his eyes. “Yes, I left. I ran because I was scared , scared like you are right now. But at least I am man enough to admit it.” He paused, something desperate slowly pushing past his anger. “And I apologized and came back, did I not?”

“Is that supposed to be enough?” 

“It could be.”

A moment of silence passed between them, even as the room was still filled with the sound of fighting. Loki and Stephen had just managed to cut through most of the suits clinging to them and were now trying to break through the line of protection the other suits had built around their creator.

“Did you think I wanted any of this? I am doing what I must , but you were the one who-” The other Tony had started to ramble, but then he frowned, eyes darting down to where Tony was crawling across the floor on all fours. 

“Oh, don't mind me,” Tony said with a smile, trying to very discreetly continue shuffling over to the brown leather bag and snatch the apple away. “Keep up the heartfelt talk. It's doing wonders for your skin.”

Maybe Tony should just keep his mouth shut sometimes. 

He barely managed to avoid the repulsor blast shot at him, the other Tony's patience now clearly having run out. 

“You will give to me what I deserve to have.” His eyes were trained on the reactor in Tony's chest as he stalked towards him with a cold determination. 

Tony was trying to scramble away, but then a metal leg was already digging into his thigh and a repulsor aimed at his face.

“I will carry on our legacy, don't worry.”

The repulsor was whirring to life and a cold panic gripped Tony's heart. He wouldn't be able to dodge it. It would kill him and leave the arc reactor as a haunting legacy, wrecking the havoc he had always hoped to stop.

He clenched his eyes shut, the frantic sound of his heart filling his ears as he waited for the pain to come.

“Tony? Tony, open your eyes dammit!” Warm hands were gripping his shoulders, giving him a slight shake. “Tony, please, it's me.”

Tony slowly opened his eyes, only now realizing that the pain filling him came from a familiar place in his chest and not from his face having been melted off. 

“I can't protect you like this.” Worry was etched into every line of Loki's face, his eyes frantically darting between Tony and the still ongoing battle around them.

“I’m fine, you don’t need to protect me,” Tony choked out, pain flaring up in his chest that had him contort his face and bust his obvious lie. He hadn’t even used the repulsor, the physical strain alone had been enough to send him into this state.

“Tony.” Loki's voice was soft. As was the hand cupping his cheek. “You have to leave, please.”

Tony sucked in a shuddering breath, eyes darting to where the other Tony was locked in place by orange binds curled around his limbs. Stephen’s hands were moving, creating an intricate spell, but just before he could have sent it off, the suit let out what looked like an electrical shock, making the magical binds disappear and sending him tumbling through the air. The other Loki was not much better off, fending off several suits at once while clutching at the brown bag with one of his hands.

Tony slowly shook his head. "I can't just leave you here." And he also couldn't leave the apple here, not when it was so close within their reach.

"I'll be there. I’ll get the apple and I’ll be with you. Trust me." Loki suddenly twirled around, sending a green blast at a suit that had been about to attack them. “Please.”

Tony wanted to argue, wanted to push back like he always did, but his chest was aching, his body tired and his breathing still too ragged, no matter how much he tried to calm it. He hated to admit it, but it was true. He would be of no use in their fight.

“Fine,” Tony sighed and immediately relief spread across Loki's face.

“I’ll be there in a second,” Loki promised him, giving his shoulder a short squeeze.

Tony managed the smallest smile. He wished he could at least say some sort of goodbye to Stephen and the other Loki, but they were busy fighting, the sound of the battle drowning out anything he may have called to them.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

" Return ." 

The journey back to his own universe felt just as tumultuous as the one to this other one had initially been, but this time, it was at least not accompanied by another 20 story fall from the side of a building. The feeling of dizziness was just as awful though.

He slowly opened his eyes again and a familiar sight greeted him.

He was on the couch. In the tower. His tower.

“Hello Boss. I am glad to see you safely returned.” FRIDAY greeted him and just for the shortest moment Tony flinched, having expected JARVIS’ voice instead. “Has Loki not returned with you?”

“He will be here,” Tony breathed out, reassuring himself as much as her. “He will be here.”

With every passing minute, the pain in his chest ebbed away, but the concern in him only grew and he wished he could do something, anything to help. But for now he could only sit here and wait. It was absolutely nerve wracking.

“Boss, there appears to be some kind of energy signature forming in the room.” FRIDAY’s voice cut through the eerie silence that had settled around him.

Tony's eyes darted across the space, and his heart jumped at the sight of a small golden spark that grew bigger and bigger until suddenly Loki all but stumbled into him, landing directly in his outstretched arms with a loud oompf . 

Loki lifted his head, still looking a little dazed and Tony quickly pushed away the strands of hair that were falling into his face.

“You okay?” Tony frantically scanned Loki's face and body and while there was a bit of blood clinging to his skin, other than a few scratches there were no visible wounds.

Loki gave a slow nod, probably still recovering from the whiplash. “Yes.”

“The others too?”

Loki gave another nod and Tony sagged with relief. They had done it. They had made it out. 

His eyes went to Loki's hands and he swallowed. “What about the apple?”

Loki's lips slowly curled into a grin and with a shimmer of green, the brown leather bag appeared in his hand. “I got it.”

It ended up being a bit more complicated than just taking a bite out of the very unnaturally golden apple. If he were to simply do that, it might try to heal his chest wound with the reactor still in it, leading to painful complications. So, they had to remove the reactor and the shrapnel in one go and feed the apple to Tony immediately afterwards. The doctors had looked more than pale, Loki's looming figure certainly not helping the mood in the operating room, but despite all odds, it all worked out.

Tony had almost forgotten what it felt like to breathe that deeply, to live without the constant throbbing pain and fear of any movement too sharp making it flare up again.

It made him appreciate all the things he had once thought of as mundane, no matter how small they might be. The wind in his hair as he flew across the sky in his suit, the sight of a sunset painting the clouds the most intricate of colors, the taste of coffee, the smell of rain, the feel of his lover's touch, trailing patterns across his skin and spreading warmth within his body.

Tony had his entire life ahead of him. With a certain god of mischief right by his side.

“Do you think the other versions of us managed to get along at some point?” Tony mused in the evening, letting black curls tickle against his chin.

“I don't know,” Loki admitted, his low voice vibrating against Tony's chest. “But I do know that if the other Loki's willpower is half as strong as mine, he will not have stopped trying.”

It had been three months since their trip. Tony had more than once thought about visiting the other universe again, but hadn't brought it up so far. As long as they were here, they couldn't know if things had gotten better or turned for the worse and there was a certain comfort to that. Pandora's box was, after all, a dangerous thing to open.

“You are thinking too much,” Loki murmured, twisting his head to look up at him.

“Maybe I am.” Tony licked his lips. “Distract me?”

Loki let a gentle smile wash over his expression, fondness hanging in every corner of his face. He pressed a small peck against Tony's lips. 

“Of course, my dear.”

An ache went through Tony's chest, but it was the kind he’d happily live the rest of his life with.