Chapter Text
Hyun-Jin’s breath is unsteady as he wraps his hand around Felix. His cock pulses against his palm, hot and heavy, and he pushes down the last of his embarrassment, shame, and fear of messing up—and quickly gets to work wrapping his lips over the tip. Instinctively, Felix’s head tilts back against the plush couch, his throat bobbing as he swallows a curse. His fingers thread through Hyun-Jin’s hair, gripping—not to push (yet), not to guide, to feel. Hyun-Jin sinks deeper, and the heat of his mouth makes his breath stutter further. Hyun-Jin’s tongue presses along the underside, dragging slowly and purposefully, testing, learning. Hyun-Jin is careful, cautious, but Felix can feel the need simmering beneath his hesitance—the way his fingers move to grip his thighs and how he shifts slightly, as if restraining himself from doing anything more.
Felix’s grip on Hyun-Jin’s hair tightens just a fraction when he takes down more of him, lashes fluttering as he adjusts, and his throat constricting as he pushes himself further. A faint whimper escapes him, almost inaudible, and a shiver racks through Felix at the vibration it brings. He forces himself to stay still, to let Hyun-Jin set the pace, but it’s difficult with the way his mouth feels—warm, wet, perfect around him. His body screams for more—for movement, for heat, for Hyun-Jin’s submission—but he reins himself in, watching as Hyun-Jin tries something new and quickly gains confidence.
His fingers tighten against Felix’s thigh, and when he glances up, Felix nearly loses it. Hyun-Jin lips are slick with spit, his eyes watery and half-lidded. There’s something intoxicating about the sight, something raw and intimate that makes Felix’s pulse hammer.
He repeats the motion, again and again, faster and faster. He licks along the underside, tracing a vein with the flat of his tongue before swirling it around the tip, tasting, teasing. “Mhm,” He moans softly, voice rough, fingers stroking through dark strands. “You’re doing so good.”
Hyun-Jin bobs his head faster at that, cheeks hollowing as he sucks with more intent, more hunger. He presses closer, his fingers gripping Felix’s thighs, nails digging in just slightly as he finds a rhythm. His tongue flicks against him on each pullback, his lips sealing tight around him when he sinks down again. He sucks harder, his tongue working against Felix in just the right way, and when he presses his lips down to the hilt, letting Felix feel the tight clench of his throat, Felix loses it.
A deep moan rips from his throat as pleasure crashes over him. His hips jerk forward instinctively, and before he can stop himself, his grip tightens, forcing Hyun-Jin’s head down as he spills into his mouth. Hyun-Jin gags a little in surprise—throat constricting as he tries to take it all. He only realizes what he’s done just as Hyun-Jin pulls back carefully, lips red and stretched, his throat still moving as he finishes the last of it.
Felix’s stomach twists with guilt as much as it does with newfound arousal, his hands loosening immediately from Hyun-Jin’s hair. “Shit—I didn’t mean to—”
He braces for any sign of discomfort, of hesitation. Instead, Hyun-Jin swallows thickly once more, his tongue flicking out to catch the last trace at the corner of his mouth. He exhales, and his voice is hoarse when he murmurs, “…It’s okay.”
Felix watches him, and then he groans, dragging a hand down his face. “Fuck.”
“You’re fine, I promise.” Hyun-Jin wipes at his chin, his expression something of utter shyness. “Was it…good?”
Felix stares at him, still dazed, still feeling the ghost of his mouth on him. And then he lets out a soft laugh, reaching forward to cradle Hyun-Jin’s face in his hands, his thumbs brushing against flushed cheeks. “Good doesn’t even cover it,” He answers, before pulling him up and kissing him deep. His tongue slides into Hyun-Jin’s mouth, tasting the remnants of himself on his lips. It’s warm, slightly bitter, and the knowledge of it sends a shudder through him. He deepens the kiss, groaning softly as his fingers press into the back of Hyun-Jin’s neck, pulling him closer, wanting more—more of this, more of him.
Hyun-Jin melts into it at first, his body pliant under Felix’s touch, but then he tenses. His breath turns uneven, his grip on Felix’s shirt tightening before he suddenly pushes back. Felix blinks, dazed and confused, watching as Hyun-Jin swallows hard, his jaw tightening as he shifts in place. And that’s when Felix notices—Hyun-Jin’s painfully aroused, his hard-on straining against the fabric of his pants. His chest rises and falls with quick, exhausted breaths as if trying to regain control, to not give in to the way his body is screaming for relief.
Felix smirks slightly, about to tease, but Hyun-Jin cuts him off with a quiet, “Not here.” His voice is strained, edged with something desperate, and his fingers twitch as he adjusts himself subtly. “I don’t have a change of pants.”
Felix chuckles at that, but he doesn’t push, doesn’t tease—not yet, at least. He watches as Hyun-Jin forces himself to take another steadying breath, his expression serious, focused, as if mentally pushing all thoughts of pleasure aside. Then, after a moment, Hyun-Jin speaks again, quieter this time. “At my appointment earlier, Chang-bin recommended I…uh…try subspace again. Properly.” His eyes flicker toward Felix’s, hesitant but determined. “So, I was also thinking…when we get home…you know.”
Felix’s breath catches, the implication hitting him instantly.
Hyun-Jin swallows, shifting again, still achingly hard and trying to ignore it. “You could help me then. And…fuck me—as another reward.”
Felix’s eyes darken, his grip tightening slightly on Hyun-Jin’s wrist. His heart pounds, his own arousal stirring again at the mere thought of it. But he doesn’t rush, doesn’t let his hunger take over—not here, not now. Instead, he leans in, voice low, teasing. “Are you sure you’ll last that long?”
Hyun-Jin looks away, but the flush on his cheeks betrays him. “Just—let’s get out of here first.”
And that they did.
Felix barely acknowledges the teasing smirks and hushed comments as they make their way through the hall. Hyun-Jin keeps his head down, his fingers twitching in Felix’s grip, but he doesn’t resist. If anything, he lets himself be led, his steps quick and eager. Chan raises a brow as they pass, arms crossed, but says nothing—just gives Felix a pointed look before shaking his head with a grin. Ji-sung, however, leans against the wall, eyes gleaming with amusement. “Leaving so soon?” He muses, voice dripping with implication. “Hope you both have fun.”
Hyun-Jin groans, while Felix just smirks, tightening his grip and pulling him along without pause. The moment they step outside, the cool night air hits them, but it does little to quell the heat simmering beneath Felix’s skin. He wastes no time ushering Hyun-Jin into the car, climbing in after him and shutting the door with a click. The drive home is quiet—too quiet. The tension between them is thick, and Felix notices the way Hyun-Jin's not-so-subtle shifts in the passenger seat. From the corner of his eye, he takes in every detail—the way Hyun-Jin’s lips are slightly parted, his eyes fluttering closed only to flicker open again, his gaze darting between his lap and the window as if desperately searching for something else to focus on.
But it’s useless. If anything, his attempts at distraction only make it worse. His thighs press together, shifting subtly, but not subtly enough. Felix leans in just enough for his breath to ghost over Hyun-Jin’s ear. “Nervous?”
Hyun-Jin shudders but shakes his head. “No.” A beat of silence. “Just…anticipating.”
Felix grins, letting his fingers drift over Hyun-Jin’s thigh, just enough for his hips to jerk up. The moment they arrive back at the apartment, Felix wastes no time pulling Hyun-Jin out of the car and into their home, kicking the door shut behind them. The second it clicks into place, he turns, pressing Hyun-Jin against the wall for another kiss.
Hyun-Jin’s pupils are blown wide when he pulls away, his breath shaky. Felix drags his fingers down the column of his throat, feeling the rapid pulse beneath his fingertips.
“You asked me to help you, right?” Felix murmurs, voice low. He tilts Hyun-Jin’s chin down, forcing him to meet his gaze. There’s something intoxicating in his look at him—Hyun-Jin’s waiting, trusting, completely at his mercy. “Tell me what you're not okay with.”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
“I’m fine with everything,” Hyun-Jin clarifies. “Anything you also want to try…too.”
And that’s how it starts.
But…Hyun-Jin doesn’t know how it exactly got where he is now—
“Keep your legs open.” A deep, strict command. He obeys, though with some mental resistance. His legs spread again, and there reveals his sopping wet cock—dripping and slick with too much lube. There’s a bow tied at the base—graciously taken from the bouquet—and his hair is still damp with water from the shower they took together some time ago. (He would have had time to dry it, had Felix not ushered him out quickly and assaulted him with kisses). Hyun-Jin shudders, his fingers curling against the sheets beneath him. His body thrums with a restless, aching need, heat coiling tight in his gut. He’s sensitive—so painfully sensitive that every breath feels like too much, yet not enough at the same time.
Felix kneels between his spread legs, taking his time as he drags his fingers along Hyun-Jin’s inner thighs, the touch featherlight, teasing. “Look at you,” He muses, voice dripping with satisfaction. “So obedient, so pretty like this.” He reaches out, running a single finger along the underside of Hyun-Jin’s cock, barely touching him, just enough to make him jolt. “Dripping so much even though you haven’t cum.”
Hyun-Jin bites back a whimper, his thighs flexing. The bow at his base is tight, restricting him, denying him relief. It’s maddening, the constant pressure, building and building that has nowhere to go. Felix smiles, clearly enjoying the sight of him squirming. “I can see how much you’re struggling,” He murmurs, dragging his thumb over the slick tip, watching as Hyun-Jin’s body jerks in response. “You want to come so badly, don’t you?”
Hyun-Jin nods frantically, his breath coming in short, desperate gasps. “Yes,” He whispers, his voice wrecked, pleading. He’s been wanting to ever since he got on his knees before him, the car, in the shower, but Felix thought it’d be a good idea to try something new—something that’d possibly get his mind to stop being so loud during moments like these. He doesn’t mind it, doesn’t mind trying, but the desperation clawing within him is what he does mind.
Felix keeps stroking his cock at an agonizingly slow pace that drives him mad, but he has enough self-control to not reach his own hand down. He wants—God, he needs, but Felix is taking his time, drawing out every moment until the tension in his body feels agonizingly unbearable. “Just…please. Faster..”
Felix hums, thoughtful as if considering it.
The rising pitch of Hyun-Jin’s voice is intoxicating, the quiet little whimpers slipping through his bitten lips sending heat straight to Felix’s core. He stops at the tip, rubbing his thumb in slow, deliberate circles, smearing the wetness there.
Hyun-Jin practically mews, his head turning into the pillow to stifle a desperate cry.
“Oh?” Felix muses, his tone sickly sweet. “You don’t like that?” His thumb presses down just a little harder, teasing, taunting. “Should I stop altogether?”
Hyun-Jin jerks, a sharp whimper spilling from his lips as he shakes his head frantically.
Felix chuckles, satisfied, and returns to stroking, just a tiny bit faster than before—so minuscule a change it’s barely noticeable.
Hyun-Jin’s frustration mounts. His hips twitch, his body screaming for more, but the second he tries to thrust into Felix’s hand, Felix lets go completely.
“Fuck—fuck—fuck—” Hyun-Jin turns his head and gasps into the pillow, his voice breaking.
Felix tuts, tilting his head. “Are those the only words you know?” His tone is light, teasing, but there’s an underlying edge to it that makes Hyun-Jin shiver.
He swallows hard, his body trembling with need, but Felix only watches, expectant.
“If you want more,” Felix murmurs, brushing his lips over the shell of Hyun-Jin’s ear, “Beg me.”
Hyun-Jin tenses. His pride flares instinctively, his lips pressing into a thin line. He doesn’t beg—he never has, never needed to. His body jerks when Felix’s grip tightens slightly, grounding him, making it clear he won’t get what he wants until he asks.
Felix is patient, waiting, watching, his touch teasing but never giving enough. Hyun-Jin hates the way Felix watches him with those knowing eyes, hates that he’s so unbearably hard it hurts, and most of all, he hates how much it’s making his body burn.
“Come on,” Felix says softly, trailing his fingers up the inside of Hyun-Jin’s thigh, just barely grazing where he needs him most. “You know what to do.”
Hyun-Jin presses his lips together, shaking his head. He won’t. He refuses. He still has some dignity left, and if Felix thinks he can just break him down that easily—
Felix’s fingers tighten around the base of his cock, squeezing just enough to make Hyun-Jin’s breath hitch, his body betraying him with the way his hips twitch forward. “Nothing?” Felix tilts his head, feigning disappointment. “You don’t want me to touch you?”
“I do,” Hyun-Jin grits out through clenched teeth.
Felix hums, amused. “Oh, you do?” His grip loosens completely, hands slipping away, leaving Hyun-Jin burning with unfulfilled need. “Then ask. I could do this all night, you know. Just touching you—barely touching you. Listening to those little sounds you try so hard to swallow down. You’re still thinking too much, Hyunnie.”
Hyun-Jin exhales shakily, swallowing around the lump in his throat. He wants to fight it, to hold onto some semblance of control—but it doesn’t take long for the last of his resistance to shatter. “Please,” He breathes, his voice hoarse, barely above a whisper.
Felix leans in, pressing a lingering kiss to his flushed skin. “Please, what? Be specific.”
“Felix—Please,” He says again, voice cracking. “Touch me. I wanna c-cum…”
Felix hums in approval, his fingers finally wrapping around Hyun-Jin’s cock again, stroking faster, firm. “Good boy.”
Hyun-Jin shudders at the praise, his breath hitching as Felix picks up a steady rhythm. The friction is everything, the relief hitting him so hard he almost keens. His hands scramble for purchase against the sheets, his thighs trembling as Felix’s grip tightens just enough to make his entire body jolt. “F-Felix,” he chokes out, his voice wrecked.
“I know,” Felix soothes, pressing a lingering kiss to his throat. His free hand moves lower, fingers trailing over the knot of the bow still tied snugly around the base of Hyun-Jin’s cock. “You’ve been so patient for me. Do you want me to take it off now?”
Hyun-Jin nods—desperate, frantic—but Felix only clicks his tongue.
“Use your words,” He reminds him, slowing his strokes to an agonizing pace again, just barely moving.
“Please, take it off,” Hyun-Jin gasps, quivering. “Take it off—mhm, please, I need it—”
Felix obliges, his small fingers making quick work of the tie. The second it loosens, the pressure that had been holding Hyun-Jin back snaps. His orgasm crashes over him with a force that rips a broken moan from his throat. His entire body spasms, his hips jerking wildly as hot ropes spill over Felix’s fingers, his stomach, his thighs—everywhere. His chest heaves as the pleasure pulses through him in relentless waves, his nerves alight with overstimulation.
Felix strokes him through it, milking every last drop, his touch gentle now, soothing. Hyun-Jin whimpers, his thighs twitching as the aftershocks roll through him, his body utterly spent.
“So good for me,” He murmurs, pressing a kiss to his trembling lips. “You did so well.”
Hyun-Jin melts against him, still shivering, his mind hazy with the remnants of pleasure. And as Felix holds him close, fingers tracing soft patterns against his skin, he realizes all over again that—He loves this. Loves him.
But It’s not over—not yet. The air between them is still thick with heat, charged with something deeper, something unspoken. His pulse stutters as he feels Felix’s fingers tighten against his waist, grounding him just before he pulls away slightly. There’s no need for words—Felix’s intent is clear in the way he moves. And then, before Hyun-Jin can catch his breath, Felix is reaching for the bottle of lube. The click of the cap is loud in the quiet room, and Hyun-Jin barely has time to process it before he feels Felix’s slick fingers pressing against his entrance.
Hyun-Jin lets out a soft, startled sound, his thighs twitching as Felix circles the rim, teasing. “F-Felix, wait—” He’s still trembling, still too sensitive after being denied release several times now, the ghost of it leaving his nerves overstimulated and raw. But Felix just shushes him, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek as he pushes the first finger in. Hyun-Jin gasps, his body jolting. His hips instinctively try to squirm away, but Felix’s free hand presses down firmly on his stomach, keeping him still.
“You can take it,” Felix murmurs, voice low. “It’s exactly what you need.”
Hyun-Jin’s breath hitches, another whimper catching in his throat as Felix slides his finger in deeper. His body clenches around the intrusion, still sensitive, still too much, but Felix is relentless. He curls his finger just right, and his entire body shudders as pleasure sparks up his spine, mingling with the remnants of his last orgasm.
“Oh, fuck,” He whines, his hands clutching uselessly at Felix’s wrist. “It’s—ah—still so much—”
Felix smiles sweetly. “I know,” He says, pushing in a second finger without warning and rubbing it against his prostate.
Hyun-Jin cries out, his back arching, toes curling at the stretch. His thighs twitch as Felix curls his fingers inside him, working him open with precision. Every drag, every press against that sweet, sensitive spot inside him makes him tremble, makes his breath hitch.
Felix leans in close, lips brushing against Hyun-Jin’s ear as he murmurs, “You wanted to go under, right? Then let go. Don’t think—just feel.”
Felix presses in deeper, curling his fingers just right. His mind is already going hazy, his body pliant, helpless under Felix’s touch. He can’t fight it—doesn’t want to fight it. But it will definitely take a lot until he can undergo subspace. As Felix adds a third finger, stretching him wider, teasing him open—Hyun-Jin surrenders into submission. He's not quite to the point they need, but he’s willing to follow everything Felix wants him to do without resisting physically. (Unless it’s more, more, more overstimulation.”
Felix watches him closely, noting the way his body tenses and relaxes in waves, the way his breath halts with every deep stroke of his fingers. He’s close again—but also close to falling, to slipping into that place where nothing exists but sensation, but he’s not quite there yet. Felix presses a kiss to Hyun-Jin’s temple, murmuring against his damp skin, “That’s it.”
A shaky sound leaves Hyun-Jin’s lips at the praise. “I—I can take more,” He breathes, though there’s a slight tremor in his voice, a hesitance that Felix catches. He smiles against Hyun-Jin’s skin, a low, pleased hum escaping him.
“Can you?” Felix challenges, withdrawing his fingers almost entirely before easing them back in, torturously slow. Hyun-Jin lets out a soft sound, his hips twitching, trying to chase the movement. Felix presses a firm hand against his waist, pinning him down. “I don’t think you’re quite there yet,” He murmurs, a note of amusement in his voice. “Not until you really let go.”
“Yes—I can. Just…don’t tease me again.” Hyun-Jin whines, frustration laced in the sound, but Felix keeps going, keeps coaxing him deeper. He strokes against that spot inside him with intention, curling his fingers just enough to draw out another sharp gasp, another needy arch of his back. But Felix knows—he’s slipping, little by little.
He just needs one more push.
Felix retracts his fingers,
“Lay back and spread your legs,”
Hyun-Jin makes a soft, needy sound at the loss, his breath shaky as he obeys, his body moving almost on instinct. He lays back against the pillows, his thighs parting without hesitation, exposing just how wrecked he already is. His cock twitches against his stomach, still flushed, still slick from earlier, and the sight alone makes Felix’s own arousal throb painfully.
Felix takes his time, dragging his gaze down the length of Hyun-Jin’s body, from the way his chest rises and falls in uneven breaths to the way his fingers curl into the sheets.
Felix reaches for the bottle of lube again, warming it between his fingers before slicking himself up, making sure to coat every inch of his length.
Hyun-Jin watches with wide, glassy eyes, lips parted as if he wants to say something but can’t find the words. His body is already trembling, his muscles tight with anticipation, and Felix smiles, leaning down to press a kiss against his knee. Hyun-Jin nods, a quiet whimper escaping him as Felix presses in again, this time with the thick head of his cock. He moves slowly, teasing, barely pushing in before retreating, making Hyun-Jin feel every bit of it.
Hyun-Jin shudders, his fingers flying to grasp at Felix’s forearms, his legs twitching as if he wants to close them, wants to trap Felix between them—but he doesn’t. He listens. He keeps himself open. He lets Felix take him apart piece by piece.
Felix doesn’t ease him into it—doesn’t give him time to adjust. The moment he’s fully seated inside, he grips Hyun-Jin’s thighs and moves. The first thrust knocks the breath from Hyun-Jin’s lungs, his body rocking back against the mattress with the force of it. The second has him gasping, eyes fluttering shut as pleasure slams through him, raw and overwhelming. The pace Felix sets is rough, relentless—every stroke deep and precise, dragging against the spot that has Hyun-Jin’s back arching, his fingers grasping at nothing.
The bed creaks beneath them, the headboard knocking faintly against the wall with every movement. Hyun-Jin can’t keep still—his body won’t stay still. Every thrust sends him further up the mattress, his legs trembling as Felix holds them apart, keeping him where he wants him. His breath comes in rough, uneven pants, his hands clawing at Felix’s arms, his back, anything he can reach. He’s drowning in it, in the way Felix takes him, in the heat, the pressure, the raw intensity that has his nerves sparking with every push and pull.
“Fuck,” Felix grits out, voice strained. He leans down, pressing Hyun-Jin deeper into the mattress, the new angle forcing out a desperate cry. “You feel that?”
Hyun-Jin nods frantically, unable to form words, unable to do anything but take it. The pleasure coils tighter and tighter until he feels like he might break apart completely. His cock twitches uselessly against his stomach, and after another few thrusts, his climax comes over him again.
The cycle continues until he’s pushing at Felix’s chest—Tears are streaming down his hot cheeks and past his bruised, swollen lips that he can’t seem to stop biting. He doesn’t know how many times he’s cum—how many times Felix has wiped his tears, pushed his closing thighs back open, and drilled into him with that fast, rough pace. And if anything, Felix doesn’t slow down. He tightens his grip on his thighs, forcing them apart despite the tremors wracking his body.
“I’m—F-Fuck. I’m so sensitive.” Hyun-Jin whimpers and it’s the most wrecked, vulnerable Felix has ever heard him.
Felix surprisingly buries himself deeper. “I know,” He murmurs. “Just a little more, baby. You can give a few more, can’t you?”
Hyun-Jin shakes his head despite it all, it’s not a clear yes or no—he doesn’t even know himself—but Felix takes it as the latter regardless.
His eyes flicker over Hyun-Jin’s tear-streaked face before dragging down to where they’re joined—where he is still stretched open around his cock, still clenching around him, still taking it. “You say that,” He murmurs, voice thick with satisfaction, “but you’re still letting me fuck you.” He leans down, lips brushing against Hyun-Jin’s, swallowing the shaky sob that spills past his quivering lips. “You’re still crying for me, still squeezing around me like you love it.”
Hyun-Jin whimpers, shaking his head weakly—always in denial—but the way his body responds betrays him. His back arches off the mattress to let him reach deeper (which shouldn’t be possible), and his fingers are digging into Felix’s arms, clinging despite the way he tries to push him away. Felix chuckles, dragging his fingers through the wet mess on Hyun-Jin’s stomach before thrusting forward against that sensitive spot that makes him cry out every time. “See?” Felix whispers against his skin. “You’re still so fucking greedy for me, jin.”
Hyun-Jin clenches around him tighter at that, and his grip on Hyun-Jin’s thigh tightens as he shoves his leg further over his shoulder, driving even deeper inside. “That’s it,” He breathes, voice rough, eyes dark with something dangerous as he watches Hyun-Jin dryly come apart beneath him—there’s nothing much left for him to give. His mind is foggy, body limp, but he feels it—feels the way Felix fucks into him harder, rougher, chasing his own release. The pressure builds, unbearable, and then Felix is there, burying himself to the hilt with a satisfied moan.
Hyun-Jin gasps as warmth floods his insides, his overstimulated body convulsing at the sensation. His fingers grasp weakly at Felix’s arm, his lips trembling around desperate little whimpers as he stays buried inside him, grinding deep, making sure every drop stays where he wants it. “You take me so well,” Felix murmurs, brushing damp hair from his face, his breath heavy, but his grip firm. “So perfect for me.”
Hyun-Jin is already teetering on the edge of lightheartedness at the praise. Every thrust has him gasping, he’s sensitive, overstimulated, and barely holding on, but still—still—something within his is trying to fight subspace.
Felix notices. He always notices. The way his eyes are glassy, half-lidded with pleasure, but Felix can tell—he’s still thinking too much. Felix slows his movements, just enough to make Hyun-Jin’s frustration bubble to the surface. He cups Hyun-Jin’s jaw, thumb tracing slow, soothing circles against his cheek. “Let go,” He murmurs, voice soft but firm. “You don’t have to hold on. Just feel. Let me take care of you, please?”
Hyun-Jin’s breath hitches, his lips parting, but no words come out. His throat bobs as he swallows hard. He wants him to. He doesn’t have to be in control all the time. He doesn’t have to think, doesn’t have to worry—Felix won’t leave him. He won’t pull away the second Hyun-Jin is vulnerable, won’t twist this into something ugly, won’t use it against him. What is he scared for?
Felix leans in, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of Hyun-Jin’s lips, then another against his jaw, then another to the rapid pulse at his throat. Soon enough, something inside him cracks, the last barrier between him and surrender fracturing under Felix’s touch. Hyun-Jin’s breath stutters, his body going limp beneath Felix, every last bit of tension draining from his muscles. The weight of everything—the doubt, the fear, the need to control—washes away like sand pulled back into the ocean, leaving nothing but the warmth of Felix’s hands.
His eyes glaze over, his lips parting as a soft, shaky breath escapes him. Felix watches it happen in real time—the moment Hyun-Jin lets go. The moment his mind drifts, floating somewhere light and quiet, somewhere safe. Felix cups his cheek, thumb stroking over the flushed skin. “That’s it, baby,” he murmurs, voice dripping with affection. “Just breathe. I’ve got you.”
Hyun-Jin exhales shakily, his grip on the sheets finally loosening, his body melting against Felix’s own. He stops fighting, stops thinking, and simply lets go.
Felix smiles softly, pressing a lingering kiss to his forehead. “Good boy,” he praises, voice a gentle caress. Hyun-Jin lets out a quiet whimper, curling slightly into Felix’s warmth. He’s gone—deep—and Felix will make sure he stays safe there for as long as he needs.
Every deep thrust wrings another breathy moan from his lips, his body arching instinctively into Felix’s warmth. His hands grasp at Felix’s shoulders, his back, anywhere he can reach—desperate to hold onto him, to feel him closer, deeper.
Felix obliges, pressing soothing kisses along his jaw, his cheek, the corner of his mouth.
Hyun-Jin tilts his head to chase Felix’s lips. The kiss is slow, sweet—Felix lets him have it, lets him take what he needs, swallowing every needy sound that spills from his mouth. When Felix pulls back slightly, Hyun-Jin’s grip tightens, nails digging into his skin. “No,” He pleads, his voice raw, desperate. “Don’t pull away. Don’t—don’t leave.”
Felix hushes him softly, brushing damp strands of hair away from his forehead. “I’m not going anywhere, baby. I’ve got you.”
That’s all Hyun-Jin needs to hear. His body relaxes slightly, but his hold on Felix never loosens. He keeps him close, clinging to him like a lifeline, drowning in the warmth, the pleasure, the comfort of being taken care of so thoroughly. “Don’t pull out…either,” He murmurs, barely audible, his voice tinged with something almost pleading. He wraps his legs tighter around Felix’s waist, locking him in place. “Please—just stay. I need you.”
Felix groans softly, pressing their foreheads together. His movements slow, hips rolling in deep, unhurried strokes that make Hyun-Jin tremble beneath him. “You need me?” he echoes, kissing the corner of Hyun-Jin’s mouth.
Hyun-Jin nods frantically, breath hitching as pleasure coils tight in his stomach. “I need you. So much,” He gasps. “I love you, I—please, Lix, just—”
Felix cuts him off with another kiss, drinking down his broken words. His hands smooth down Hyun-Jin’s sides, grounding him, holding him together as he starts moving again—slow and deep, exactly how Hyun-Jin needs. “I’ve got you,” He whispers. “Always.”
—-
Eventually, after several rounds—after more crying, overstimulation, and commands, it’s time to stop. Felix notices the shift immediately—the way Hyun-Jin tenses ever so slightly, his fingers twitching against his skin, the faint hitch in his breath. He knows this part, knows the way awareness sneaks back in and brings the weight of everything with it. He tightens his hold, rubbing slow, soothing circles against Hyun-Jin’s back, keeping him grounded.
“Hey,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to Hyun-Jin’s temple. “You with me?”
Hyun-Jin exhales shakily, his face still tucked against Felix’s neck. “Yeah,” he breathes, but his voice is small, laced with something fragile. His eyes dart away, like he doesn’t know what to do with himself now that he’s coming down.
Felix doesn’t push.
“You did so well,” Felix whispers, letting his lips brush against Hyun-Jin’s hair. “So, so well for me.”
Hyun-Jin swallows hard, shifting slightly, but he doesn’t pull away. Instead, he clings tighter, burying himself deeper into Felix’s warmth. His body is still trembling, his mind still foggy, but he’s more aware now—aware of the way Felix is still holding him, still here. And God, he needs that.
Felix, patient as ever, strokes his back, trailing his fingers in slow, deliberate patterns. The tenderness in his touch makes Hyun-Jin’s chest ache, and before he can stop himself, he mumbles, “Thirsty.”
“Of course you are,” He says, brushing damp strands of hair away from Hyun-Jin’s forehead. “Stay here. I’ll get you some water.”
Hyun-Jin hums, letting his eyes slip closed as Felix gets up. He listens to the quiet shuffle of movement—the sound of Felix padding into the kitchen, the clink of a glass being filled—before he returns, nudging the rim against Hyun-Jin’s lips.
“Here, drink.”
Hyun-Jin cracks his eyes open, takes a few slow sips, then sighs in relief. “Thanks.”
Felix sets the glass aside before easing back onto the bed, pulling the blankets over them. He shifts, drawing Hyun-Jin against him again, warm and secure. “How are you feeling?”
Hyun-Jin pauses for a moment. Thinks. “…Okay.”
Felix doesn’t push, doesn’t press for more. He just nods, kissing the top of his head again. “Good.”
The silence that follows is comfortable, laced with exhaustion.
And just before he drifts off completely, he feels Felix’s hand slip into his, fingers lacing together, grounding him in the best way possible. “I’ll start a bath soon, for now you can sleep if you want.”
“Okay,” He squeezes back.
Hyun-Jin never thought he’d have this—something steady, something real. For so long, his life had been an unsteady thing, shifting like sand beneath his feet, slipping through his fingers no matter how tightly he tried to hold on. But then Felix came back into his life, and suddenly, everything stopped unraveling.
It wasn’t instant, and it wasn’t easy. There were still nights where the past clung to him like a phantom, where old fears whispered in the dark, telling him he didn’t deserve this, that it would all slip away eventually. But each time, Felix was there—steady, patient, unwavering. He never let Hyun-Jin disappear into his own head for too long. He pulled him back, again and again, until the fear dulled and the whispers faded.
Now, lying in Felix’s arms, feeling the slow, even rise and fall of his chest, Hyun-Jin finally understands what it means to be safe. To be wanted, not for what he can give, not for what he can do, but simply for who he is. And for the first time in his life, he doesn’t feel like he has to fight. He doesn’t have to prove himself, doesn’t have to pretend.
He’s allowed to just be.
And that’s all he could ask for.
He’s loved.)