Chapter Text
SweetCaroline: Good news!
DustBunny: What is it, Carol?
SweetCaroline: We managed to find someone to hopefully save RHM!
Also the bitch that almost killed him got arrested :)
helpmeiminhell: how the hell did they get arrested so quickly after being crowned leader
SweetCaroline: @BeBiDoCrime
*BeBiDoCrime is online*
BeBiDoCrime: I took a page out of Rey's book and sold him out :)
It was a win-win deal. I suggested he break out some of our members out of The Wall, I told the warden Henry's exact plan, as he's been after Henry for a few years now, and Dmitri promised to leave the Toppat Clan alone (or the airship at least)
Reybies: ...
I'm so proud
BeBiDoCrime: btw I'm not really running the toppat clan rn since I'm too busy helping Dr. V.
So instead I'll add the third-in-command, who is currently the temporary leader
*BeBiDoCrime added Blåhaj*
*BeBiDoCrime is offline*
Blåhaj: hi my name is sven and im a big dumb dumb
TripleHat: ...I knew Reginald was a bit strange but why did he put a kid in charge
SweetCaroline: Daisy I know that's you. Give your uncle his phone back
Blåhaj: Aw :( your no fun mom
LifeOfTheParty: Mom?!?!?!
Blåhaj: Hi there! Sorry about that. My niece got ahold of my phone and thought it would be funny if she said that to all of my contacts. But yes, my name is Sven Svensson, I am 23 years old, and I take care of all of the clan's finances.
Dadoftheyear: Holy shit am I a grandfather?!
SweetCaroline: Biologically, no. Legally, yes, unfortunately
Blåhaj: So I'm just being ignored?
Frankenstein: You'll get used to it. Wanna talk in DMs?
Blåhaj: Sure, why not!
Dadoftheyear: I have a few questions. 1, how many and what are their names. 2, who is your wife. 3, how many are yours and how many are RHM's. 4, who is RHM's wife, since I know for a fact that the ladies are all over him
SweetCaroline: 1, You (legally) have 3 grandkids, 4 if you count Daisy. The other ones are named Burt, Hannah, and Luca
2, Are you being transphobic or did you seriously know I'm a lesbian.
3, Daisy's my only kid. The rest are RHM's.
4, Reginald :)
Dadoftheyear: I'm choosing to ignore the 4th answer, since there is no way either of my kids are gay
helpmeiminhell: ITS LITERALLY IN RHM's USERNAME???
Dadoftheyear: What the hell is a lesbian. Is that a word for husband???
LifeOfTheParty: SUGVJGDIOBFEFBOJH HELP???
Cloudywithmeatballs: I don't know what a ton of the sexuality terms are, but I do know that a lesbian is a girl who likes other girls romantically.
SweetCaroline: Or a non-man who likes other non-men. But yes, you are correct, Cloud.
And I don't exactly have a wife, I have a partner
Dadoftheyear: Okay, but is it a boy or a girl???
SweetCaroline: Neither. Their name is Savannah, or more commonly, Earrings, and they are Sven's older sibling. Also Daisy's biological parent.
Dadoftheyear: Why are you using 'they'??? It's only one person!!
SweetCaroline: Fuck this. @helpmeiminhell @LifeOfTheParty help this excuse of a father figure out what a gender neutral person is. I'm going to feed my bird.
(After explaining bcuz once again, lazyyyyy)
LifeOfTheParty: And that concludes today's episode of explaining queers to a queerphobe!
Dadoftheyear: I'm gonna go cry but first how many people here are 'queer'?
Reybies: Aroace
TripleHat: Same
Bitchless: Bisexual
SweetCaroline: Trans and lesbian
DustBunny: Cloudy and I were together before we died!
Cloudywithmeatballs: Still are, actually.
helpmeiminhell: Genderfluid + omniromantic
LifeOfTheParty: Bigender n Bisexual
SweetCaroline: Regs Bisexual and RHM's gay
Bitchless: I believe TRNK is agender.
Dadoftheyear: Fuck all of you, I'm going to go rethink my afterlife.