Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

  "Heeeeeeeyyy!!"

  As I’m about to cross the street, I turn my head to see an annoyingly adorable girl running toward me from the distance, waving her arms in the air like she's totally oblivious to any attention she might draw to herself. That girl is Sayori, my neighbor, crush, and good friend since we were children. We used to walk to school together, but starting around high school she would oversleep more and more frequently, and I started getting in trouble with my teachers for always being late. Eventually, Sayori just told me to go on without her. I never wanted to...but if I got into more trouble with my attendance, they’d have to call my Papa, so I ended up taking her advice. 

  Normally I’d be ecstatic to see her...but, if she's going to chase after me like this, I almost feel better off running away. I could never be that rude to Sayori, though. Instead, I just sigh, take a deep breath to hopefully get rid of the blush on my cheeks, and idle in front of the crosswalk, waiting for Sayori to catch up to me.

  Once she does, she immediately bends over, hands on her knees and panting heavily. "Haaahhh...haaahhh...I finally woke up on time today!" I roll my eyes as I adjust my backpack and wait for Sayori to catch her breath. After a few seconds, Sayori stands upright, all traces of her exhaustion gone. She beams, "Aren’t you proud of me, Natsuki?” 

  Choosing not to answer that question, I turn away, face heating up much too quickly for my liking. “D-did you really have to run all the way over here? You both look and sound like you’re about to collapse.”

  I turn my head back just in time to see Sayori’s eyes widen for a moment as she takes in my comment. Then she pouts, pressing her pointer fingers together and puffing out her cheeks in that adorably over-the-top gesture she’s picked up over the years. "Eeehhhhh? Hey, that's mean  Natsuki!"

  I scoff. “It’s not my fault you decided to tear through the sidewalk to get to me, instead of just walking!”

  Returning her arms to her sides, Sayori relents. Her pout morphs into a calm smile, "Fine, fine~ But you did wait for me, after all." As I’m trying to form an excuse as to why I decided to wait, she comes up behind me and wraps her arms around my shoulders. "I guess you don't have it in you to be mean even if you want to~"

  My eyes widen, and I turn my head to the side in order to face her, “Eh--Eh?!” 

  The words I was planning on saying immediately leave my throat as I realize how close our faces are together. Suddenly, I’m hyper aware of the feeling of her arms clasping in front of my chest, her arms loosely around my neck, her breath in my face... 

  I whip my head to the other side, “Wh--What the heck’s that supposed to mean--?! Ugh--!” Embarrassed and worried about anyone seeing, I push her off of me and begin to speedwalk across the street.

  “Hey-- Natsuki, wait up!!” Sayori runs after me. After I’ve crossed the street, my senses get the better of me, and I slow down again. Once she catches up, I cross my arms and turn away from her to begin walking again. Sayori giggles, making my heart beat faster and making the air seem a lot warmer than it actually is, before falling into place beside me. 

  For a moment, I let my hands fall to my sides...but then I realize she could easily take them in hers, and I wouldn’t know how to react. My hands go back to gripping my arms as I cross them, again. I can’t let myself be caught off-guard like that.

  As we make our way to school, the streets become increasingly speckled with other students making their daily commute. After a good bit of silence, Sayori speaks up again.

  "By the way, Natsuki..." She tilts her head to look at my face closer, clasping her hands behind her back. That’s another pose she’s started doing, another one that I can’t trace the origin of. “Have you decided on a club to join yet?"

  “Eh...” I pause, taking in her question. Sure, I’ve been looking at some clubs. In fact, I really wanted to join one this year. The baking club seems cool...but there’s so many students there, I’d feel really out of place and nervous. I do like to write poetry sometimes, but I haven’t really found any clubs for writing. As for the anime club...I just know it’s full of creepy guys that’d comment on my height, weight, chest size, and everything in-between, so no way in Hell am I ever joining them. Redirecting my thoughts to Sayori, I let out a huff of annoyance.

  "No, I haven’t. I can’t find anywhere I would...” 

   Fit in.  

  “...Nevermind.” 

  Sayori pauses, looking at me with a twinge of worry. “Aw, but Natsuki...”

  I cut her off with a glare. “No buts. I’ve looked, and I haven’t found any that I like. And this is the final day to join clubs, right? So, I’m not going to be joining any clubs this year.” 

  Sayori looks down at the ground. Her head is tilted just enough that I can’t see her expression, but I can guess as to what she’s thinking; she’s trying to come up with a club for me to join. I sigh. Seeing her worry about me like this always makes me upset. “Sayori--”

  “Do you still like poetry?”

  I’m caught off-guard by her question, and end up stuttering for a good two seconds. “W--What?? I mean, yeah..? Why?” 

  Her eyes light up. “I may just have the perfect club for you, then!” Before I can argue with her, Sayori holds up her hands, ticking off every detail on her fingers. “It’s small, it’s about literature, and everyone there is really nice! There aren’t even any dedicated activities yet, so-- ooh, you could read your manga in there! I know you don’t really like reading it at home.”

  I close my mouth, which had previously been slightly open as I was trying to think of something to say. That...does sound pretty good. Really good, actually...it meets every one of the requirements that I’d want. It seems way too good to be true. Especially that last line. I narrow my eyes. 

  “I don’t believe that last line. If it’s about literature, I bet everyone in there is a snob.” The same kinds of snobs I used to have for friends. I ditched them a couple of weeks ago, with Sayori’s encouragement...but ever since then, besides for Sayori, I’ve been kind of...alone. 

  “Oh, no! I promise, it’s not like that! Everyone is really sweet, and they’d have no issue at all!” As we enter the school gate, Sayori’s eyes widen, and she excitedly claps her hands together, jumping in place as she does so. “Hey, I have an idea! How about I show you the club this afternoon?” 

  ...I begin to mull it over. I never have anything to do in the afternoon, so it wouldn’t be a problem. I guess I could stop by for an afternoon, to see if it’s really all Sayori’s making it out to be. After a slight pause, I nod. “Sure, why not-- Eh--?!”

  Sayori wraps her arms around my waist and picks me up. "Yaay~!" She starts spinning me around. With no other option available, I wrap my arms around her neck and lower my head to her shoulders, my face burning. I forgot Sayori’s way stronger than she looks--!

  I cover my face and eyes with my hands, unwilling to let anyone see the color quickly spreading across my face. “S--Sayori-- PUT ME DOWN!!!”

  “Ehehe...sorry~” Once my feet are firmly planted on the ground again, take a moment to catch my breath, then I wipe the front of my blazer off with my hands. When I look back up at Sayori, she’s smiling sheepishly. I glare at her. Unlike most times, however, my glare actually affects her. Sayori’s expression fades to one of guilt, and it startles me enough to cause my face to fall in confusion.

  “I’m sorry, Natsuki...” She repeats, looking down at the ground. “I’m just excited for you to meet all my friends. I...um...” Her hands grab each other nervously as she looks up at me again. “Are you mad? Will you still come with me?” 

  I frown sadly, crossing my arms. “Of course I will, dummy! I said I would, after all. And...” My face scrunches up as I think about what I want to say next, and I turn my head to the side. “I-I’m not that mad about you, uh...doing that. B-but we’re in public! It’s embarrassing! So...”

  Sayori looks down at the ground, eyebrows drawn together in thought. She nods to herself, “Yeah, I can see how that’d embarrass you. I’m sorry Natsuki, I wasn’t thinking...” 

  “Stop apologizing! It’s fine, I just overreacted.”

  Sayori looks up at me. She opens her mouth, but no sound comes out. After her eyes dart across my face for a bit, they flick to the side, and she closes her mouth. Silently, she nods, and continues walking to the school. I follow.

  She does this, sometimes. Where she’ll go uncharacteristically silent, and think to herself. It always unnerves me, a little, but I know it’s nothing bad. I glance over at her face; the best way to describe her expression is pensive. I turn back and stare at the ground underneath me as I think as well, smirking to myself as I recall a memory. 

  The only reason I know that word is because I had specifically been trying to find a word to describe how Sayori looks when she goes silent like this. Normally I don’t use super descriptive words like that, because I don’t think most things need them. Except Sayori, I’ve never met a person more complicated than her. It’s one of the many reasons I like her; she’s so emotionally intelligent, yet another term I looked up to figure out how to describe my best friend. She can be ditzy, and carefree and seemingly simple-minded at times...but she can also be thoughtful and respectful and introspective. If people are layered like cakes, Sayori’s a forty-layer tall work of art. Each layer has its own flavor, color, and texture, but still makes sense as one dessert.

  My eyes widen slightly, and I shake my head. Why am I making these poetic comparisons about her right now? It’s bad enough that I write poetry about her, I don’t need to be bringing metaphors into my thoughts , too. 

  It’s only as Sayori opens the door that she turns back to face me, a smile on her face. “I’ll come get you after your last class, and then I’ll take you to the Literature Club, okay?”

  “Yeah, that sounds good.” Sayori beams, and I turn away. Then, I realize something...I have no idea what this club is, or who’s in it. “Wait, Say--” I turn my head just in time to see a coral-haired girl dash down the hallway and turn a corner. I feel like I just got tricked. With an exaggerated huff, I head to my first class.

~~~~~~~

  The school day is as boring and annoying as ever, and it seems to drag on for infinity. Finally, though, after what feels like days, it's over. After I pack up my things, I open my classroom door-- 

  “Gah--!”

  “A--Ack!”

  I almost trip as I come face to face with Sayori, who seems just as surprised as I am, but she grabs onto my arm and steadies me. With a small squeak of embarrassment, I pull away. 

  Sayori giggles sheepishly and starts apologizing. “Sorry, Natsuki! I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking...I was so focused on scanning the hallways to make sure you hadn’t left that I didn’t see you exiting your classroom!” 

  I roll my eyes, crossing my arms again. “Fine, fine. Now, where is this club, anyway? I want to get it over with so I can go home.”

  Truthfully, I’m just trying to keep my brain in check; there’s no way Sayori’s club is as good as what she said, so I can’t get my hopes up.

  Sayori’s eyes light up once again as she remembers why she came to get me. “It’s on the third floor, come on!” She trots in place a bit until I’m ready to go, then darts down the hallway towards the stairwell. Grabbing both backpack straps, I jog after her.

  I follow Sayori across the school and upstairs, which is a section of the school I rarely visit, since it’s generally used for third-year classes and activities. As we walk, I see a couple of clubs I remember checking out. I had expected this club to be part of the group, but instead Sayori led me further down the hall, amidst all the empty classrooms. My eyes narrow as I scan the hallway. All the normal clubs have actual clubrooms, filled with large tables, counters, and various other things to suit their needs. Why is she leading me down here..?

  Finally, we stop at a seemingly random door, far down the hall and almost completely separated from all the other clubs. Sayori throws open the classroom doors and drags me inside. 

  "Everyone! The new member is here~!"

  "Hey, I never said I was a ‘new member’--!"

  Eh..? I glance around the room. Inside, there are two other girls. One approaches me, long purple hair trailing behind her as she walks over. Her grey eyes, while friendly, have a sort of intensity that knocks the wind out of my lungs as she stares at me.

  "Welcome to the Literature Club. It's a pleasure meeting you. Natsuki, is it? Sayori always says nice things about you." 

  The second girl approaches next, brown hair in a ponytail and tied with her signature white ribbon. She smiles warmly, a small gesture that makes my knees feel weak.

  "Ah, Natsuki! What a nice surprise! Welcome to the club!"

  "..."

  All words escape me in this situation, and the realization is so stunning that I feel like I have to take a moment to catch my breath. This club...    

   ...is full of incredibly cute girls!!

Chapter Text

“I’m...”

I’m...what? What can I say to everyone here? I’m shocked? I’m terrified? I’m excited? All of the above? As I continue to try and grasp what’s happening, all of the girls continue to stare at me. The second one giggles as she turns her head to the side slightly, and Sayori starts to speak as she moves to stand beside me. 

"Ahaha, don’t be shy Natsuki! Everyone’s been really excited to meet you, you know~”

“Th--” My face has to be on fire by now. “Th--They have..?!” 

”Mhm!” Before I can interrogate Sayori on what things she’s told these girls about me, she points to the one with purple hair and grins. “Natsuki, meet Yuri! She’s super pretty, and the smartest in the club!”

"Ah, Sayori...D-Don't say things like that..." Yuri turns away, hands idly playing with her long hair. She seems, compared to the rest of us, much more mature and timid. She’s also super pretty, like Sayori said...but I’d never just say that to a stranger!

"I-it's nice to meet you...Yuri." Her name is so pretty, and her shy smile makes my heart feel like it’s doing cartwheels in my chest. It occurs to me that I should write a poem about this feeling later...but definitely not with Sayori around. She’d immediately tell her. I don’t think I’d be able to survive the embarrassment.

Sayori turns to the other girl, then gestures in her direction as she looks at me with a smile. "And it sounds like you already know Monika, is that right?"

"That's right. It's great to see you again, Natsuki."

Monika smiles sweetly. I feel like my heart’s working overtime at this point. We do know each other - well, I never got the courage to talk to her, but we were in the same class last year.

Monika was probably the most popular girl in class, and maybe even the school...Smart, beautiful, athletic...basically, completely out of my league. But, then again...I’m not very desirable. Short, skinny, flat...practically every girl is out of my league. Especially all the ones that are in the room with me right now. Before I had realized my crush for Sayori, Monika was the first girl I’d ever had a crush on. So, seeing her again, and having her actually be talking to me...

My voice comes out as an embarrassed mumble, "Y-You too, Monika..."

"Come sit down, Natsuki!" Sayori starts to head towards the closet. “I’ll start making the tea~!”

Yuri steps in front of her, fiddling with her hair again. “Actually, I’d like to handle the tea, Sayori. It is my tea set, after all...”

Sayori blinks a few times before her signature embarrassed pout forms on her face. She steps back, “Oh, yeah!” As Yuri heads to the closet, Sayori calls out behind her, “Ehehe, sorry. I got a little too excited~" After getting a nod from Yuri, Sayori turns and heads over to the back of the room.

I follow Sayori to a few desks in the back of the room that have been arranged to form a table. Sayori sits down, and I pull out the seat beside her. From here, I can see Yuri walking over to the corner of the room, opening the closet and taking something out. Monika sits down in the chair across from me. 

Shit. 

Flustered, I stare down at my desk. 

“So, how have you been, Natsuki? It’s been a while since we’ve talked.” 

...‘It’s been a while’, huh? With a twinge of annoyance, I look up at Monika. We never talked last year. Ever. I would have remembered...I guess she doesn’t really have time to remember whether or not she ever actually had a conversation with me, so she’s just assuming. I’m about to bring it up, but I decide not to push my luck. Instead, I take a small pause to brush past it and decide to go along with her.

“Yeah, sure has. I’ve been, u-uh...” Wow. She’s really pretty. And she’s looking directly at me... “...fine. What about y-you..?” Despite my best efforts to sound unbothered and nonchalant, I still stutter slightly, and cringe inwardly after I get my sentence out. Monika giggles, sending my heart into overdrive, and Yuri returns to the table, carrying a tray with a tea set. She carefully places a teacup in front of each of us before walking around, pouring everyone’s tea for them. Finally, she sets down the teapot on the tray again. 

Surprised, I look over the set. When I had heard the words ‘tea set’, I didn’t think she meant a full tea set, I thought she meant a few cups and a teapot--! But no, there’s multiple small ceramic containers for cream, sugar, honey, and the like. There’s even one of those fancy multi-layered...plate things! Unfortunately, all it has is sandwiches. I’d have preferred sweets...

“(Is that even allowed..?)”

“Oh, don’t worry! The teachers gave us permission.” Monika cheerfully responds, and I suddenly realized that I had said my thoughts aloud. Quickly turning bright red, I turn away and move to pick up my teacup, so I can use it to hide my face--

“Ack--” I had forgotten how hot tea is when it’s freshly brewed, and grabbed onto the actual cup instead of the handle. With my fingers feeling like they’re on fire, I drop the cup--

“EEEYAHHH--!” All three girls stand up as I do, scalding hot tea now soaking the front of my skirt. With tears quickly coming to my eyes, I stumble away from the table as the rest of the group moves towards me. The teacup clatters loudly on the ground, causing everyone to cringe. 

Yuri is the first to call out an apology, “I--I’m so sorry--! I-I didn’t think to warn you, the tea is very hot when f-first poured--!” I continue to back up, mind racing over what’s just happened.

(I just ruined everything. All of these pretty girls, and I just humiliated myself in front of them! In front of my best friend, in front of Yuri, even in front of Monika--! They’re never going to want me to join now..!) 

The sudden urge to cry overcomes the rest of my senses. I continue walking backwards as I try and make my way to the door, unable to bring myself to look away from everyone’s concerned faces. For a moment, I feel like I’ll make it out of the room without anyone catching me, but I hit my side on the edge of a desk. As I suck in a breath and press my hands to my hip, Sayori puts her hands on my shoulders.

“Natsuki, are you okay?! That probably hurt really bad, I’m so sorry!” 

I nod my head. “I-I’m fine, but I should go--”

Yuri rushes over, carrying paper towels and wearing an incredibly guilty expression. The realization that the tea could stain my skirt snaps me out of my embarrassment, and the pain also returns as I press the towels to the fabric.

“Are you okay?? Uuuu...this is all my fault, I’m so ashamed...” Yuri buries her head in her hands and steps back before letting out an anguished cry. 

“N-no--!” I can’t believe I’ve upset all these girls. Now determined to somehow salvage things, for their sakes, I try to smile despite the pain. “I--I’m fine, please don’t be upset, Yuri. It was my fault, anyway...” 

My skirt’s about as dry as it’ll get for now, so I drop the paper towels and reach out to place a hand on Yuri’s shoulder. It’s slightly awkward, given how tall she is, but it seems to do the trick. She looks up from her hands and squeaks slightly. I smile.

“See? I’m fine, I-I just freaked out.” I take my hand off of her shoulder, and Yuri slowly brings her hands down to her chest. She nods slightly, and Monika comes up to us. 

“Are you sure you’re alright, Natsuki?” I nod, ignoring the way my heart does backflips at the pronunciation of my name. There wasn’t anything weird about the way she said it...but still. 

“Mhm...I--” I have to apologize. All the girls look at me expectantly, curiosity seeping into their expressions, and the embarrassment comes creeping back into my voice, “I-I’m sorry...for ruining--” Suddenly, they all go wide-eyed and begin shaking their heads. Sayori speaks first, then Yuri, then Monika.

“No, no! You didn’t ruin anything, it’s okay!” 

“Pl--Please, don’t apologize! It wasn’t your fault. I assure you, you’ve done nothing wrong.”

“There’s nothing to worry about, Natsuki!”

I eye the girls carefully, worried that I’m assuming incorrectly, “D-Do you still...want me to join?” Monika lets out a laugh, and my face flushes. She’s laughing at my question. Before I can get defensive, she speaks. 

“Of course! We wouldn’t kick you out for something that wasn’t your fault. That is, if you still want to consider our club.” 

They’re giving me a chance, still? I thought I had humiliated myself...

I nod after a short pause of consideration, and all the girls begin to visibly relax. Monika motions towards the table. “In that case, why don’t we go sit down again?” 

We head over to the table again, and Sayori takes away the chair I had been sitting in, and pulls it to the side. I raise an eyebrow. When she notices my puzzled facial expression, she makes a small noise of realization and gestures to the seat.

“We wouldn’t want our new member to sit on a chair that’s gotten tea spilled on it!” As she’s saying that, Sayori takes another chair and sits it back in my spot, then gestures for me to sit down without removing her hands from the back. Slightly confused, I nod, then move towards her. But as I’m about to pull my chair in...Sayori does it for me.

“Eh--?”

“Hehe...” With a badly coordinated bow, Sayori quickly returns to her own seat. I scoff and turn my head in an attempt to divert attention away from my face, feeling a blush come back again.  Both other girls laugh quietly, and Monika intertwines her hands before resting her chin on them. Yuri, seeming like she’s suddenly remembered to do so, stands up and reaches for the tea pot.

“Oh, would you like some more tea, Natsuki? I can understand, if not.”

“Why do you guys have a tea set, anyway?”

Yuri pauses, "Ah, well...Monika asked the teacher’s for permission after I requested to bring mine in.” She looks down at her cup, tracing the rim with her finger, “Personally, tea is a must-have when I’m reading any book. It helps me to relax."

“That probably wouldn’t be too good for me, considering what a mess I made earlier...” I mumble to myself, half-joking. Yuri smiles softly, and I draw my brows together and frown as I start blushing again. I swear, my face has been red way more often than not as of today, and it’s starting to get embarrassing...maybe if I’m lucky, all the girls here will just assume I blush easily instead of thinking it’s because they’re all cute.

“Oh, I’m sure you’d be alright. You were just caught off-guard today, not to mention you’re in an unfamiliar environment, which I presume isn’t helping your nerves. Again...” Yuri turns away and fiddles with her hair, dipping her head down slightly as she avoids eye contact. “I’d like to apologize for not warning you about the tea cup’s temperature beforehand. I don’t know why it never crossed my mind...” 

“N-nah, you’re fine.” Yuri’s eyes dart over to meet mine, and I hurriedly become incredibly fascinated with the marks etched into my desk. “And...yeah, tea would be good.”

Yuri nods, and slowly pours the tea. As she does so, a thought crosses my mind; If I could excuse myself to go to the bathroom, I’d have enough time to compose myself and take in my situation. Rising to my feet, I gesture towards the door.

“Uh, actually...c-could I go to the bathroom for a sec? I wanna try and uh, fix my skirt.”

Monika raises her eyebrows and nods, moving to stand up herself and walking over to me. “Oh, of course! Here--”

“Eh--?!”

Before I can comprehend what's happening, Monika’s pulling out my chair so I can leave. 

“H-Uh...w--” Shocked, I stumble backwards slightly, before making my way to the door. “...th-thanks...I’m just gonna--! Yeah. Be right back, ahaha!” 

I pull open the door and dart out, heading to the bathroom. The entire time, my mind wanders between the three girls; Sayori, Yuri, and Monika.