Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

QUICK AUTHORS NOTE BEFORE WE BEGIN! There is a tumblr now. ex-angels-anonymous. If you end up liking this fic please check it out! Spoilers warning.

This Seraph was already aware of its fate. Seraphim are smart like that, they're built that way, their wings are put on that way, their minds and eyes are trained that way. Seraphim are imbued with divine knowledge, and are damn close to perfect, at least if you believe what they say.
But here's the thing about what they say. It's based on the testimony of guys that benefit when you think they're perfect and without flaw. The biggest of these guys presumably being God.

All that is to say is that Seraphim are smart, but they aren't perfect. They aren't perfect because God made them, and God isn't perfect either. God makes mistakes. There are contradictions. There are errors. And that exact revelation is what landed this Seraph where it was.

This Seraph was too smart for its own good, another revelation it was coming to. This Seraph contemplated a little too hard. This Seraph became a bit, just a tiny bit, disillusioned with the whole singing God's praises day in and day out thing, this Seraph started to enjoy getting chosen to deliver divine messages a bit more because it got to get out of that admittedly very loud, bright, and shiny throne room for a while. The other Seraphim were all like (behind God's back of course, of course the Seraphim love gossip, and He's not looking ALL the time. Another contradiction, the Seraph thought, God is not all knowing, He doesn't know about our little talks, if He did I'd have been cast out ages ago for that thing I said about Jesus when he first came around,)

“Why do you like Earth so much? It's so dark and dirty! And the sin, it's lecherous, it's terrible! Such sights poison our eyes.”

This Seraph only laughed nervously, removing as much emotion from the action as possible, and explained that it was simply a servant of God, and that Earth was sinful and dirty but it must do its duty, to serve God with grace and humility. “Besides, I enjoy bringing humans closer to God, to their divine purpose.”

But God does, from time to time, check on the thoughts of His angels, especially those closest to Him, especially if they'd been around for a while, and this Seraph sure had been floating around for a while... This Seraph knew that the end was coming. Having these thoughts was sinful, and angels are without sin. Therefore this Seraph would be destroyed, instantly, easily, and replaced with a brand new one in time. (Another contradiction; brand new, custom built rather than bred Seraphim take a lot of energy to make, and a lot of time. This Seraph had seen it. That “world in 7 days” thing has to have been bullshit.) This Seraph had all these thoughts in about five minutes, and panic started to set in. What to do now? Abandon ship? To where? It hadn't been anywhere else, just Earth and Heaven. Why even try to save itself? The end would come anyway.

That thought sparked another. This Seraph had appeared to a child trapped in a hidden crevasse, only a few years after Jesus was martyred.

“Be not afraid, for God is with you,” it had said, and the child asked if it was an angel here to save him. This Seraph stayed silent. Not because it wanted to, but because in all its divine knowledge, it had no idea what to say. No one was coming to save this child. And the child would die. His parents did not know where he was, and this Seraph was not instructed to inform them, or to physically help in any way. It was simply a messenger of God, the purpose of this visit was spiritual salvation, not physical. The child would die.

“Climb up,” it had settled on saying, “climb out.”

And the child tried. He tried for a long time, and when he gave up, this Seraph could do little more than say again,

“Climb up.”

“Why should I even try to save myself?” The child asked, “I will not get out alone. I will die. Please help me!”

And this Seraph could do nothing but return back to heaven to sing praises to God. That was the night this Seraph said that thing about Jesus that probably would have gotten it destroyed, if God had noticed or searched its mind, but he didn't, because God is not all knowing or ever present.

Some angels who'd had similar, louder thoughts about God during that whole Eden fiasco and more balls than this Seraph had decided to fight for control of heaven in the War.

Well, what happened to those who chose to fight in the War? This Seraph knew they were flung down to Hell. What's Hell like? Terrible. Horrible. Fire and brimstone, massive columns of fire constantly burning, endless pain and torment. There would be no salvation.

Earth it is, then. One last excursion before God notices it is missing and looks for it, finds it, and destroys it. This Seraph felt fear, then anger, then sadness, then peace, in sequence and very quickly, as it was very practiced in ignoring or forcing away its emotions in the constant presence of God.

Chapter Text

Once upon a time, some guy with nothing better to do decided he wanted to get fucked up in the woods for fun. This was going to be pretty easy because he lived within walking distance from the woods, and was newly in possession of a plastic bag with four grams of shrooms, a bong, and some weed.
The most shrooms he’d ever taken at once was three grams and that was easily five months ago. He remembered it as a neutral-good time, because the visual effects when he walked down the hallway kind of made him nauseous, but he was very eager to try again. Alone this time. With weed on board, of course, to counteract the nausea. He was ready.
He put his bong in his backpack along with his other supplies and began the hike to his favorite spot, a place locally called The Falls. It was a steeply sloped but still fairly easily climbable rock face with a creek running down it. Cool mountain water pooled in several carve outs in the rock formed by centuries of the creek running over and onto the rock face. It was beautiful and comfortable and this human had wanted to do this here for a long time.
He laid out a towel on the rocks (because he didn’t have an extra blanket), took his shirt off since it was so hot out, and started setting up his stuff. He packed a bowl, filled the bong with river water, and started taking hits. Nice. He tried to blow smoke rings and unfortunately did not succeed. Eh, whatever, time to eat these shrooms. He did his best to actually chew and swallow the shrooms without gagging and washed them down with lemon juice. Hell yeah. Things were gonna get interesting soon.
He leaned back against a rock and looked up at the clouds and the sky for a good half an hour. Relaxing, he listened to the birds sing and the sound of the water rushing by. As the shrooms started to kick in, the sky came alive with fractal patterns of color, transparent enough that he could easily see the clouds, but still very noticeable. The soft color patterns moved in spirals and harsh angles, intermingling in a way he could barely describe if he tried. Such a beautiful day, he thought, picking up the bong again and getting ready to take another hit. For some reason though, his eyes flicked up to the sky as he took the hit.
In the sky was a massive creature, peering down at him and hovering in place. It had six wings covered in white feathers and a massive central eye, as well as smaller eyes lining the tops of its wings. If he really looked, the human could see a hint of two birdlike legs tucked underneath the bottom pair of wings when the creature flapped them just right. The creature’s body was overall very hard to comprehend or describe, but the best Isaiah could do was say it looked kind of like multiple shifting, confusing, hard to describe components roughly organized into the shape of a bird with its head cut off, if a bird with its head cut off was on a SHIT ton of DMT. Or if he was on DMT, I guess that would be a better descriptor. The creature must have been at least as big as a three story house.
The human screamed, almost dropping his bong, and tried to scurry backwards on his hands and feet to get away from the creature in the sky. The shroom induced fractal patterns behind it swirled and changed, and it stayed there, stock still in the air, flapping its wings much more softly than it seemed like it would have to to keep that massive body airborne.
“BE NOT AFRAID!” It said out of reflex, in a booming voice that felt to the human like it shook the very mountain. This did not, in fact, make the human any less afraid.
“W-what are you?” He asked, putting the bong down and staring up at the creature in disbelief. “Are… are you an angel?”
“I am an angel, a Seraph of the Lord your God." The Seraph replied, and a few sticks fell from the surrounding trees with the power of its voice. Truly, it had just been flying over the mountains aimlessly until The Falls caught its many eyes. The area had looked pretty, and the Seraph wanted to get a closer look. This human even being able to see the Seraph was a shock to it, as it had not intentionally revealed itself. It had assumed it was watching the human without his knowledge.
“Oh, fuck.” mumbled the human, “Maybe four grams is a little too much… fuck, it’s only been like half an hour. This trip is only gonna get weirder.”
“Four grams of what?” The Seraph asked, “If you do not mind my asking.”
“Uh, shrooms.” Replied the human.
“Ah, that must be the other substance I can smell on you,” It said, “I could smell the cannabis smoke miles away.”
“Okay, okay, you can just get it over with, okay?” Said the human. “Enough with the judgment, tell me I’m going to hell and then get out of here! I don’t care how many angels He sends, I’m not gonna be a Christian!”
“I did not come here to tell you that you are going to hell,” Said the Seraph, “And besides, you look like a young human, you have time to repent.”
“Then why are you here, smart guy?” He retorted. “I’m warning you! I already worship other Gods, and they’re a lot cooler than yours. Yeah, that’s right, I said it! Fuck your God, Hail Dionysus!” He put up his middle finger at the Seraph and picked up his bong again.
“I am not here to convert you,” The Seraph said, and then paused before its next sentence. Was it really going to go that far, blaspheme God publicly, to this pagan human? It thought for only a moment before deciding that yes, it would, as it was already a dead Seraph flying for even being here at all right now. “And I am starting to think you may be right about the whole ‘fuck your God’ thing. I became disillusioned with the shouting praises to God thing, and I wanted to see the Earth one last time before my destruction. That is why I am here, on this mountain. I am going to be destroyed soon. I did not know you could see me.”
“Wait, seriously?”
“Yes, “seriously.”” The Seraph said, “I will leave this place now and leave you to your vices. I did not intentionally frighten you. Farewell.” It poised its wings to ascend again.
“Wait!” Shouted the human, before the Seraph could begin to fly away, “Wait a second! Hang on! Before you go, do you want a hit?” He held the bong up to the sky in the general direction of the Seraph. “If you’re about to die anyway, y’know? It’s what I would wanna do.”
The Seraph paused, incredulous and contemplative. Thirty minutes ago, this Seraph would never have thought about trying cannabis. It never would have thought or said or done any of these things. But for some reason, for some inexplicable reason, the Seraph approached the human, shrinking down its form as it descended from the sky until it was about the size of a large horse. It landed with its birdlike feet about ten feet away from the human.
The human was small, even for a human, but the Seraph could easily tell he was an adult. He looked fragile, delicate even, but then again, all humans look that way. They are easy to kill and destroy, their lifespans are short, and this one (who couldn’t possibly be older than twenty five years old) was already injured, the Seraph thought. He had two large scars underneath his pectoralis muscles. The Seraph wasn’t necessarily up on the trends in human medical science these days, but those kinds of scars looked to it like the marks of some major lung or heart surgery. This human had even less time than the others. If the human had known what this Seraph was thinking, he would have been flattered that he passed so well that a literal angel of God couldn’t tell he was trans.
The Seraph was not used to being on solid ground. In fact, it had spent the past hundred years continuously flying, shouting praise to God. It had never really allowed itself to fully notice the feeling of tiredness and fatigue in that time, fearing God's wrath, but landing, admittedly, felt very, very good. Relaxing. Comfortable. It suppressed a sigh, folded up its six tired wings, and began to walk-hop towards the human.
“Woah, you can change size?” Asked the human in wonder.
“Yes,” Replied the Seraph, in a much, much quieter voice than before, more appropriate to its new smaller form. “I must be able to appear to humans in smaller spaces than this, such as a church or temple.”
“Does it hurt to shrink down?” He asked.
“No.” Replied the Seraph. “If anything, the larger form requires more energy to maintain. In God’s Throne Room we easily feed from divine energy, but here on Earth we must feed from the sun. I have not been on Earth long, you see, and I was testing to see if the larger form could gather more solar energy.”
“Does it?”
“No.”
“Do you prefer being bigger or smaller?”
“Smaller.”
“Do you get to be smaller often, in the throne room?”
“No, I must be bigger there to adequately please God with my songs of praise.”
“Can you eat other stuff than just divine energy and sunlight?”
“You ask many questions, human,” Said the Seraph, “And in all honesty, I would like to, how did you phrase it? “Take a hit,” now, please.” It moved a bit closer.
“Well, that’s where my questions were kind of leading to, dude.” The human replied. “CAN you even take a hit? Do you have a mouth? Lungs? A circulatory system? How about a brain?” Isaiah had to ask because of just how incomprehensible this creature was. He really couldn't tell anything about it from looking at it other than "holy shit what the fuck."
“I do have a mouth, it is how I am speaking to you. It’s covered by feathers, below my central eye.” It replied. “As for your other questions, I do not know. I suppose we will see.”
“Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean you don’t know?” The human sat up straighter.
“Seraphim are created messengers and praisers of God.” The Seraph explained, “We are imbued with divine knowledge, but that knowledge includes only knowledge God found it important for us to have. We do not know of our own nature past this: we exist to praise God.”
“You don’t know basic shit about your own body?” Asked the human. “God never, I don’t know, mentioned that to you?”
“I do not, and he did not.” Replied the Seraph. The human put his fingers to the bridge of his nose in frustration for a moment before sitting back upright,
“Y’know what? We’re going to unpack that together when we’re both stoned.”
“Stoned?”
“High.”
“Does stoned mean high to you?”
“Yeah, dude.” The human said, picking up his lighter. “Alright, do you want to hold the bong or should I?” The Seraph looked at the human with what the human could only interpret as mild embarrassment and clear nervousness.
“I do not know how to operate your… bong.” It said
“Want me to do it for you?”
“Yes please.”
The human reached forward and brushed aside the feathers underneath the Seraph’s central eye. They were cool to the touch and parted easily, exposing thin but soft looking lips and a mouth full of three rows of dangerously sharp dagger-like teeth. Maybe he was just high, but the human could have sworn he felt the Seraph shiver or jolt or something upon being touched by his hands. It hadn’t been touched by anything except the clouds in a very, very, very long time, and it desperately tried to suppress its burning desire for MORE. The burning nature of the sheer desire it felt in that short moment scared the Seraph half to death, fearing God’s wrath, before it was able to remind itself that God’s wrath was already coming.
“Okay, now, close your lips and I’ll hold the bong up to them… there you go.” He said, as the Seraph followed his instructions. “Ok, now, part them just a little bit. Good.” He flicked the lighter on and lit up the flower. “Now breathe in, slowly. Or if you don’t breathe, then I guess draw air in through your mouth and into your lungs. Or if you don’t have lungs, your chest area, I guess? Whatever way feels like lungs more. I don’t know how your body works.” The Seraph breathed in and closed its many eyes, and bubbles bubbled up, and the smoke traveled into the Seraph’s mouth and into its body, somewhere, and the human removed the bowl. “Now, hold your breath.” He took the bong away from the Seraph’s mouth and waited a short while, “Now exhale.”
The Seraph exhaled weed smoke past its feathers, and opened its eyes again.
“...” It was speechless at first. Evidently, it did not have lungs, but it sure did have a very efficient internal system built for maximum metabolism and delivery of divine energy to its other body parts for basic functioning, and that system evidently worked wonders for weed. This Seraph had no tolerance, no experience, no nothing, and it was getting its shit fucked up right now, for lack of proper terminology. Every molecule in its body felt like it was vibrating. It felt heat bloom in its chest and behind its eyes, pleasant heat, soft heat. The heat traveled down and back, across its aching wings, and then towards its cloaca softly and slowly, like a small drip of warm water running down its spine.
“You okay, dude? That was a fat bong rip.”
“Holy… holy…” It finally said, “Holy fucking shit, human…” It closed its central eye again.
“Haha, it’s that good, hmm? See what you’ve been missing out on?” He said, jokingly. The Seraph folded its birdlike legs up under it as if to lie or sit down, and did everything in its power not to fall into the human’s lap. But oh, how it wanted to. If it had known it would feel this good to just land on solid ground, fold up its wings and smoke weed with a human… God’s presence did make the Seraphim feel energized and good, but this? This was DIVINE.
“If you were not going to hell before,” it said, “you definitely are now.”
“Why is that?”
“Corruption of an angel,” it said, softly, swaying gently for a moment before forcing itself to remain upright.
“Hey, from what you told me before, you were already pretty corrupt for an angel.” He said, reaching for the bong. Before he was able to get his hands around it, the Seraph grasped it with what the human could only describe as a softly glowing golden disembodied hand made from energy, which it looked like it had been hiding beneath one of its wings. Bringing the glass up to its mouth again, it used another glowing energy field hand thing to pick up the lighter, and it took another hit.
“Holy, holy, holy…” It said again, as it exhaled.
“You look so tired,” Said the human, watching the Seraph slow blink a few times and direct a few too many to be subtle of its eyes towards his lap, before it handed over the bong. “Do angels ever sleep?”
“We physically can, albeit for short periods of time,” Said the Seraph, “but we do not.”
“Because of God?”
“Because of God.”
“When did you last sleep?”
“Oh, human,” It replied, “I have not stopped flying for a century.”
“That’s terrible.” Said the human. “You can rest your… head, I guess? In my lap, if you want to rest.”
“I… I would like nothing more than that.” It replied. Slowly, carefully, softly, it allowed itself to recline and relax its body, and rest in part on the human’s lap, eyes closed. The physical contact was not helping the mana-traveling-directly-to-the-cloaca situation, but in all honesty, the Seraph no longer cared. It was comfortable. It was high. And it was… happy. Part of its mind wanted to use another word to describe how it was feeling alongside “happy”, but it was not yet ready to admit to itself that this was turning it on something terrible. I am NOT feeling lust for this stupid human, it told itself, I have sinned enough today, it thought. It drifted softly off to sleep to the sound of the water and the birds. It dreamt of nothing. As it slipped into unconsciousness, its awareness of its desperately touch starved state decreased, while its bodily need for more increased under the surface, bit by bit. Unbeknownst to the Seraph, mana (which was essentially the Seraph’s analogue for blood) was flowing through its body and collecting at its cloaca, pumping through its sensitive wings, and stirring feelings in its heart that it had locked away under literal millenia of sexual repression.

Chapter Text

The Seraph awoke an hour later, fully rested, to the feeling of the human finally finding the courage to run his fingers through the feathers on the Seraph’s “head”, not that it really had a head in any meaningful way. The human really had no idea what he was looking at, but he was really enjoying petting this angel of the Lord, and playing with its feathers. They felt soft and cool, like the feathers around its mouth. God, I wanna fuck this thing, thought the human, but maybe that’s a bit too far? Can Seraphim even fuck, or even get horny? Another question to ask if he ever got around to it. When he heard a low rumble eminanting from the creature, though, he decided he already knew the answer. THAT sounded like a purr. A horny one. He'd read enough monsterfucker shit to know what that means. The Seraph gently and subtly shifted and stretched, settling into the human’s lap further in a way that read as desperately horny and embarrassed about it.
“Have a good nap?” The human asked, playfully.
“Yes.” Replied the Seraph, shifting its eyes away from contacting the human’s, feeling ashamed. Waking up to the feeling of warm, soft fingers playing with its feathers was making the ever growing arousal even worse. It stretched its wings and folded them up again.
“You wanna share another bowl?”
“Of cannabis?” the Seraph asked.
“Yes, of weed.” The human said. “I already packed one while you were asleep.”
“Yes, I would very much like to share another… bowl.” It replied.
“Go ahead, use your funny astral hand thingies to take the first hit my dude.” The human said, holding out the bong. The Seraph obliged, taking the lighter and the bong and beginning the process of taking a hit. Just as the Seraph began to inhale, the bold, stoned, and very horny human reached his hands down and began to play with the feathers on one of the Seraph’s wings. Even worse, he’d started on the sensitive junction between its wing and its shoulder. If it had any less restraint, it would have dropped the bong and shattered it into a million pieces.
“Ooohhh…” The Seraph moaned, coughing out the smoke and clumsily setting the piece of glass down on the rock face. That gentle, soft touch went right to its now dripping wet cloaca. Oh God, it thought, and that’s all it was able to think, torn between begging the human to touch its wings more and with more pressure, and flying away immediately out of pure shame.
“Oh, you like that?” The human asked. He stopped touching the Seraph’s wing for a moment to take a hit himself, drawing a soft, pained whine from the creature, before setting his hands back down on its wing again, with a bit more intention this time. “Does that feel good?”
“YES.” It said, in a desperate and pathetic voice. Being touched there so gently, so deliberately, so shamelessly, after such a long time with absolutely zero physical contact at all had shattered any semblance of restraint it had left. It wanted this, whatever this is, so, so badly. “Please, do not stop.”
“Don’t worry, angelface,” He said. “How would you like me to touch you?”
“I do not… I do not know.” The Seraph replied, close to tears.
“Have you ever been touched before?”
“No.” Said the Seraph, shivering as the human worked his hands deeper into its feathers and began to massage the wing, right where it had needed it. “Not unless we are counting being accidentally touched, such as being bumped into.”
“Have you ever touched yourself before?”
“God no,” The Seraph replied, incredulous again. “We Seraphim only even have cloacae as a testament to our purity, they exist to remain untouched! Do you really think I had ever considered touching any other part of myself for…” The human mentally stashed away the knowledge of some type of genital opening existing on this creature.
“For?” He was going to make it say it, wasn’t he?
“For… pleasure?” The human gazed down at the Seraph with intensity in his eyes that it could truly only compare to that of God. God, the human thought, it's such an adorable little virgin!
“So you have no idea what feels good and what doesn’t.” The human said.
“No idea,” it replied, “but the way you are touching my wings… it feels… very good.” It managed to say. The human used just a bit more pressure, and pressed his fingers deeper into the knotted muscle of the Seraph, working the knots out as best he could. It almost cried from how good that felt, moaning softly as it held one of its astral hands over its mouth to silence itself. I sound like a whore, it thought.
“I need you to tell me if anything hurts or feels bad,” Said the human, “but I also want you to tell me when what I’m doing feels good. And take your hand off your mouth, I want to hear you. Can you do that for me?”
“If I do that, will you keep touching me?” Asked the Seraph, weakly.
“Yes.”
“Then yes.”
The human stood up and walked around to the Seraph’s back, savoring the soft whines it made when he only briefly stopped touching it. He kind of straddled its back as best he could, and began his ministrations again by pressing the heels of his palms along the bases of each set of wings in turn; top, middle, bottom.
“How’s that?”
“Divine...” Said the Seraph, and the human could tell it meant what it said. Its worldview and ideas of morality were rapidly breaking down in favor of whatever magic this human had in his hands. He continued on, alternating between running his fingers through its feathers and massaging the tendon and muscle and flesh of its wings deeper, drawing half-stifled moan after moan from the creature, who was having the time of its life. Heat built in its core steadily. The human’s touch felt hot and electric, soothing to its sore wings and arousing as all hell at the same time, and the Seraph (who wouldn’t really know because it had never cum before, are you crazy?) started getting louder as it got closer and closer to orgasm.
“Uh,” Said the human, nervous but dripping wet himself, “what’s that I heard you say a few minutes ago about a cloaca?”
“Never mind that,” Said the Seraph, “I do not expect you to…” it trailed off into another gorgeously adorable moan for such a creature, “oohhhh, there, right there, please!” It slightly stretched out its wing, shaking , to provide the human better access. The human obliged, digging his thumb harder into the junction between its middle right wing and its body.
“No, I’m gonna mind it.” He said. “I want to touch you there, and I'm asking you if you are okay with that. I’ve read enough monsterfucker fanfics to know it’s going to be a good time for both of us.”
“I have never… no one has ever…” It said, lost in pleasure and on the precipice of orgasm, “Seraphim are not supposed to-”
“Angelface,” the human laughed, “I think we're already far past what Seraphim are supposed to do. I want to know what YOU want.”
“What do I want?” The Seraph repeated, incredulous, “I want…”
It didn't have the words to describe what it wanted, no matter how desperately it wanted to tell the human so he would do it. Yes, the Seraph was aware of what an orgasm was. But it didn't know that it could have one. It didn't know what pleasure felt like until about an hour and a half ago. It certainly didn't know that having its wings toyed with would get it this close, not that it really knew for certain what it was even close to. It wasn't used to not KNOWING. It was in every capacity smarter and more advanced than the human, more powerful than the human, better than the human, but somehow this human had reduced it to a wet and desperate mess with his two mortal hands and less than a gram of dried herbs. It felt powerless, it felt aroused, it wanted MORE. For the first time in its existence, it felt the overwhelming and almost unbearable urge to touch itself, to dip two astral fingers into its opening like it had seen humans do to themselves and one another, and thrust until… well, it really wasn’t sure. And that just added to the frustration.
“I'm not going to do anything else unless you tell me what you want, angelface.” The human said, gradually slowing down the movements of his hands on its wings.
“No, no!” It begged, “Please, do not stop!” Tears did begin to fall now from its central eye. “I was… so…close...” The human let go of its wings entirely, smiling deviously.
“Close?” He asked, “Close to what? C’mon, angelface, use your words.” He gently trailed a finger down the curve of its top right wing, just enough to really tease. It shivered and ruffled its feathers, arching its body into the touch with an air of hunger.
“I do not know!” It cried, “I do not know, and I am so very confused and aroused by all of this, and I do not know what specifically I want or what I was close to!” Its words came in a rush, and it was clearly approaching a state of delirium. “All I know is that I am sinning most terribly, I desperately want you to keep doing that wonderful thing you were doing to my wings, and it felt like I was about to… to…” It couldn’t believe it was really going to say this. It needed to cum so bad.
“To?”
“I think that I was about to have an orgasm!” It made itself say, arousal winning out through the shroud of shame. “And then you stopped touching me!”
“I did, didn’t I?” The human replied. This perverted human knew exactly what he was doing! “Hmm, well… you know, the kids these days call it ‘edging.’”
“I do not care what the kids these days are calling it,” The Seraph whined, “Please, I beg you, please keep touching my wings.”
“So is that a no on the cloaca thing?” The human asked. The question, asked again, sent a jolt down the Seraph’s spine.
“That was a serious request?” It asked.
“Hell yeah it was.” The human replied. The Seraph felt conflicted. On one hand, it couldn’t imagine a better feeling right now than this human’s soft, agile hands toying with its most sensitive parts. On the other hand…
“You will not enjoy it.” It responded. “It is not similar to a human vagina. It will be detestable to you.” And I very much do not want this thing we are doing to stop, it wanted to add.
“Try me.” The human challenged.
“I say to you again, it is not similar-”
“Ah ah, look here, angelface.” He motioned to his own two eyes as if to command the Seraph to look him in them. Its many eyes lining its wings trained on his obediently, sending a shock of heat low in the Seraph’s gut when it realized how quick it had been to obey the commands of this mortal man. “I’m not asking you what you think I’m going to think about it. I’m asking you if you want me to touch you down there.” There was a short pause while the Seraph’s mind ran wild.
“I very much want you to touch me down there,” It finally responded, “But you must understand that not only is this an act so forbidden your mortal mind could scarcely comprehend it, but I fear that you will be disgusted, and that it will cause this… act… to end.” Before I orgasm, it wanted to add, but did not. The idea of losing its virginity was turning it on more and more and more, and it honestly wasn’t sure if it was going to be able to handle it if the human was disgusted by its genitalia.
“Oh, I heard what you said before about it existing only to be left untouched,” Replied the human, gently tugging on the angel’s secondary flight feathers. How could he forget that? That sentence alone would be enough to write a book on sexual repression and denial kinks. “I want YOU to understand that doing forbidden shit turns me on, and I’m completely down with taking the virginity of a literal angel. Even if I think your pussy is weird, which I probably won’t, I’m still going to fuck with your wings until you cum. I promise.”
“A-alright, if you promise...” Said the Seraph, trying to calm its nerves, shifting positions to kind of… present itself to the human. It closed its central eye in embarrassment as it shuffled its legs apart and arched itself a bit, so its “face” was angled more towards the rock face. It spread its wings up and out a tiny bit to make room for this action. In all honesty the human still had no idea what he was looking at. He dismounted the Seraph (much to its displeasure, as that meant he had to remove his hands from its feathers,) and got down on the ground to try and get a better look. “I feel like a whore.” It grumbled.
“You look like a whore,” The human teased, spotting what he was pretty sure had to be it. The softer feathers on the Seraph’s underbelly looked significantly wetter in one particular spot, and looked like they were kind of covering something slightly protruding. Gently, he traced around that spot with his fingers, moving some of the feathers out of the way. Even that gentle touch, not even on the cloaca, just around it, caused the Seraph to jolt, and present itself much more readily than the awkward and unnatural positioning it had attempted just a few moments previously.
“Aahh! Oh, oh please,” The Seraph begged, “Oh, human!” What he was uncovering kind of looked like what he’d originally expected it to, a generally triangular in shape opening with pink puffy edges, dripping with thick, clear slime. He obviously had no proof, but he assumed when the angel was not aroused that the opening was likely less engorged, and that this was the Seraphim version of a hard on. Because of the Seraph’s warning, he’d kind of thought maybe there was going to be more than that. Maybe it was going to be, like, crazy complicated, or have eyes on it, or have teeth or spikes, but no. It was just a soft, wet, pink hole. REALLY wet, if he was being honest, the slime was dripping onto the rock face. It actually kind of looked like the Seraph must have been trying not to grind on the rock (and only just barely succeeding) while he toyed with its wings, which… did something to him, to say the least.
“You’ve got a gorgeous pussy, angelface,” He said, tracing the skin just millimeters away from the Seraph’s cloaca, enjoying the delicious whine that drew from the creature. “I can’t believe you honestly used the word detestable to describe it, you nerd. God, I’d love to fuck you.”
“You said you wanted to touch it,” Said the Seraph in desperate frustration, “Are you just going to torment me instead?”
“Oh, you’re so impatient, that’s adorable!” The human teased, “I thought just a moment ago you were concerned with your immortal soul, or my immortal soul, or whatever. What was it you said, that my mortal mind couldn’t comprehend how forbidden it was to take your virginity?”
“I did say that,” The Seraph confessed, “B-but…” The human’s continued teasing was driving it mad.
“It would just be SO forbidden for me to, say, I don’t know, move my hand just a few inches and start touching you… here?” He began to toy with the rim of the Seraph’s opening, sliding his fingers along it with gentle pressure like he would if he was going to penetrate someone’s ass for the first time and wanted them to get used to the pressure of his fingertips before actually going in. It was slick and hot and soft, so fucking soft, and he was incredibly upset that he didn’t have a dick and therefore couldn’t know what it would feel like to slide inside of this thing.
The Seraph, on the other hand, lost its fucking mind. The casual, teasing way the human had just defiled it, having not enough neurons in his head to have an idea how sinful it was to do this, to corrupt an angel, a SERAPH, to beg a human being to fuck it, to want any of this at all, to finally, finally, FINALLY be touched in a place where it truly never thought it would, it was all so much. His hands felt like divine love, no, better, and the soft, slow, I-am-taking-your-virginity-so-I-want-to-be-gentle touches were immediately not enough. It wanted more. It NEEDED more. It would do anything for more.
“Human, please, PLEASE,” It begged, “I want you to know me, I want you to defile me, I want you to dishonor me!” It was not sure the human would even understand what that meant to it, but its mind was so rattled it couldn’t find clearer words.
“Hehe, I want to get you warmed up first, angelface. You’re a sweet little virgin, remember? I don’t wanna hurt you.” The Seraph pressed itself backwards into his hand in a desperate plea for more stimulation, for him to just penetrate it already. Being called “little”, much less “sweet” was not something it was used to, as it was much larger than most creatures it typically encountered and rarely gave off any air of sweetness.
“You could not hurt me if you tried, mortal,” It pleaded, “Your hand, please, put your hand inside…!”
“You really ARE a virgin, ha ha. I’m not going to just fist you right out of the gate! I may be a kinky slut but I’m a goddamn gentleman, I’m going to prepare you first.” He dipped two fingers into the Seraph’s cloaca, to test how tight a fit this was going to be. It was honestly not a tight fit at all, the Seraph’s body eagerly accepted his intrusion. He was pretty sure he’d be able to get his fist in there no problem, with a little bit of a stretch. The Seraph cried out in pleasure, tears beginning to fall once again.
He was pretty sure he had this figured out now. The outside of the cloaca was kind of sort of analogous to erectile or maybe like, clitoral tissue. The Seraph responded very well to rubbing at it like he would his own clit or like the head of someone’s penis. The inside of it functioned more like a vagina, or maybe kind of like a vagina/urethra/asshole combo. Which, thought the human, would make sense considering the Seraph itself had used the word cloaca to describe its genitals. He thought about what that slime might taste like. The human felt amazed and accomplished, but the exploratory, too-gentle touches were making the Seraph want to scream.
“I want to taste you,” He said, using his other hand to gather a bit of the slime on a fingertip and bringing it to his mouth. It tasted almost like watered down honey with a hint of spice, very sweet but not sweet like sugar. It was strange, but he was more than happy to bury his face in it.
“Human,” It pleaded, “I appreciate your desire to be gentle with me, but I really need MORE. I am much larger than you. You ripped me away from what could have potentially been my first orgasm in the name of ‘edging’, and I am very, very aroused!”
“Do you need penetration to cum? It seemed like you were gonna cum earlier from just your wings being rubbed.”
“I do not know!” It cried. “I do not even know if I have the ability to orgasm, I just need more than your fingertips!”
“I think you’re going to like the way my tongue feels.” The human explained. “It’ll be like my fingers, but warmer and wetter, and I can lick the outside of your pussy while I put my fingers inside it at the same time easier that way.” That definitely changed the Seraph’s mind. Anything to get this human to fuck it already.
“Get underneath me,” it said, “please.”
“Aww, begging to sit on my face, now, are you?” The human teased, but he was already getting underneath the Seraph as he said those words. “Be careful you don’t crush me, okay? You’ll have to hold yourself up.”
“I can do that,” The Seraph replied.
He guided it down until it was in face sitting range, using his hands to hold it in place, and started eating the Seraph out, focusing his tongue work on the outer portion of the cloaca which he was pretty sure was basically the clit. He had not been lying, the Seraph thought, this did feel a LOT better than just fingers. But at this point it was beyond words. It was just making sounds, moaning, pleading, grinding its body into his face, making a mess of slime and tears all over the place. I am such a whore, it thought.
At first, the human just used his tongue and mouth, licking, kissing, and sucking at the Seraph’s sex, playing the poor angel like an instrument. When the Seraph noticed he could be doing a better job and using his hands if it weren’t for the awkward positioning, it summoned its astral hands and used them to hold him up. He thanked it by putting his fingers inside of it again, the pleasure from which caused it to stumble, almost crushing him.
“Careful!” He pulled back to say, and the Seraph grabbed his hair and shoved his face back up against its cloaca like it needed him to breathe. Adorable, he thought, I really am corrupting this angel. He added just one more finger, which dragged the Seraph closer to its tipping point. It wasn’t enough! Wasn’t he listening to it? Was he doing this on purpose? Did he WANT it to break?
“You have, aah, prepared me enough, human, I am so close,” It whined, pulling itself together enough to say a coherent sentence. “Please use your whole hand, I am much larger than you, I can take it! You are teasing me too much!” The human did not oblige it. It could tell he was laughing, he removed all his fingers from its sex and again pulled away from pleasuring it to respond verbally, and that was what really did it.
Unable to bear the teasing any longer, it grabbed the human’s wrist and upper arm, holding them in place with the strength of, well, a fucking Seraph, and summoned a third astral hand to push his face into its sex again. It was so fucking close, and it was not going to tolerate more ‘edging.’
“fffFFFUCK!” It cried, shoving the human’s fist inside of itself and moving his arm like a dildo. It definitely understood why the human was trying to prepare it, the stretch of going from three fingers to up to the elbow was an adjustment, but it really did not want him to be gentle anymore. “I fucking TRIED to tell you! I am sorry, human, but I cannot take it anymore!” The human’s fist felt fucking incredible inside of it, especially paired with his mouth on its opening. He was just the right size to cause a sensation of fullness but not cause any pain, and it desperately fucked itself on him, just trying to get him deeper. He allowed the Seraph to move his arm at its pace for a few dozen thrusts before realizing that it had no idea what it was doing. Once it realized that too, it stopped fighting him and let him move his arm how he was pretty sure it was going to like it better, angled towards the front of its body. This human was going to be the first one to find out if angels have a g spot.
They did, in fact, have a g spot. It was even tactile, he could feel a rougher and more protruding patch of flesh about two hand lengths in. He curled his hand in and bent his elbow, and pressed his fist (with his curled pointer finger up) into it, gently on the first thrust, then harder on the subsequent ones after the Seraph grabbed his arm again as if to say “you better not fucking stop!” The Seraph’s soft, supple walls squeezed around his fist like a vice grip, and it absolutely wailed the forbidden and lost name of God as it came.
Heat shot through its body, making the internal temperature of its cloaca almost unbearably hot to the touch, and actual fire exploded down the ridges of its wings. Something deeper inside it contracted down hard, and more of that honey slime shot out around the human’s forearm and onto his chest and face. It was a squirter. Noted.
“Oooh, oohhhhh, hhoh,,” it made soft, pathetic vocalizations as its walls continued to twitch and spasm around his arm, temperature slowly decreasing to what it had been prior to orgasm. More slime oozed down his arm and onto his clothing and the rock below them. When the twitching slowed down to only once every few seconds, the Human removed his face from its pussy.
“Was it good?” He asked, already knowing the answer. Receiving only garbled, incomprehensible speech as an answer, and seeing that its legs were absolutely shaking with the effort of holding itself up, he carefully removed his arm from its sex and got himself out from under the creature that could crush him like a bug. It collapsed into an exhausted pile on the rock face almost immediately afterwards.
“Y…Yes…” it finally managed to say in response.
“Aww, poor thing, you look absolutely wrecked. I’m proud of myself, are you proud of yourself, angelface? That was one hell of a first time.”

Chapter Text

“Proud?” It asked, “You are… proud?” It lifted itself half up, weakly.
“Fuck yeah I'm proud, I just took an angel's virginity. I honestly don't know if I can top that. I may have peaked here.”
“I feel such shame,” it said quietly.
“Why's that?” He asked, trying to wipe some of the slime off his arms so he could get closer to it to cuddle or something.
“Seraphim are not supposed to do any of these things. They are not supposed to lust, much less act on that lust. The way I held your arm, the things I said, I begged you, I climaxed…”
“It was so fucking hot!” The human assured it, finally resorting to washing the slime off in the stream. “Hang on a second... “ He climbed carefully over the Seraph's wings and tried to find some way to comfortably cuddle with it, settling on leaning on the creature and softly petting it on the head. “You told me you're going to be destroyed anyway. It doesn't matter what God thinks, or what Seraphim are supposed to want or do. You do you, dude. And for what it's worth I don't think you have anything to be ashamed of other than not reciprocating, but like, I don't really expect that out of you on your very first time.” He said.
“Reciprocate?” It said, a new, different pang of shame coursing through its chest. “I do not think I can fit my hands into you, human, besides, you have no genital opening. I assumed if you wanted pleasure you would have simply fornicated with me through…” it wasn't really sure if this applied here, but it used this phrasing anyway, “typical sexual intercourse.”
“You mean like putting my dick in you?”
“Yes.” It said.
“Haha, uh, angelface, I'm flattered, but I don't have a dick.” he explained. This was going to be a fun conversation.
“What happened to it?” The Seraph asked, seeming genuinely confused, “Did you lose it in the same incident where your chest was lacerated?”
“Uh, no. I never had one. And the scars on my chest are from a surgery I had to remove my breasts.” He explained. “I was born with a vagina.”
“But you are a man?” It asked.
“Yes, I am a man.”
“I see…” it said. It was pretty sure it had heard of something like that before in humans, but it hadn't really thought about it that much. In all honesty, the Seraph did not understand gender very well at all, as it had not been designated a gender as some angels had. “I still do not believe it would be comfortable for you to put my hand inside your vagina. But if reciprocation is what you desire, I could use my mouth on you like you did for me.” A shiver ran down the human’s spine. “I very much desire to taste you.”
“W-well, um… I'm not exactly going to stop you if that's what you want to do,” the human said, “but, y'know, if you feel shame about this whole thing, I don't want to make that any worse. I know that can feel awful.”
“I listened to your words, and they comforted me.” The Seraph said, “God told us Seraphim that he was the light, the life, the only way, but He was violent and ruthless. I have scars on my back from his punishments for things I have come to see as minor infractions at best. We all have them. Seeing Him wipe out populations of humans for things that only a fraction of them actually did, the mass killings, the contradictory orders just to toy with us, watching his Prophets have to talk him down from genocidal acts, the intense need for control… It is why I left Heaven. I knew I would be destroyed, but I would rather be destroyed than live that way. If I am going to be destroyed, I… believe that I would like to spend my remaining time in Earthly pleasure. And while I do still feel shame, I cannot lie, my carnal desire for you overshadows it.” It finished.
“Fuck. Dude, I’m sorry. The shit you must have seen is fucking wild.”
“Yes, it truly was. I do not wish to think about it now.” It said, lowering itself down. “I wish to extend this… afterglow, I believe you would call it.”
“Oh, right. Yeah. That makes sense.” The human said, “I’m sorry.”
“I do wish to reciprocate, though.” It said, trying to get the human back on track. It was hopeful that its arousal was the appropriate level of evident. Really, the human bringing up that he had a pussy and wanted the Seraph to do something with it was enough of a turn on to make that the only thing on its mind.
“Do you want to go down on me?”
“Does ‘go down on’ mean use my tongues to bring you to orgasm?”
“Yeah, I guess it does.” Fuck. It said tongues, plural, didn't it?
“Then yes, very much so.”
“Shit. Okay, yeah. Let's do this.” He said, attempting to take off his shorts. Before he got very far though, the Seraph’s hands were undoing his button and zipper and removing his boxers.
“Is there anything I should not do?” It asked.
“I don't want you to bite me, that's for sure.” He said. “I mean, honestly I have no idea what you're capable of. I want you to stop if I ask you to stop. I want to feel good. Everything else is gonna be up to you.” He said. He was pretty sure he'd never been wetter in his life. “Do you uh, are you gonna need me to guide you, or do you know what you're doing?” One of the Seraph's astral hands slid between his legs and began to stroke his pussy, softly, gently, much more gently than it had shoved his face into its crotch or grabbed his arm and used it like a dildo. Fuck that had been hot.
“Consider this, human,” it said, trying very hard to act like it could take control and be dominant, but more importantly, act like it knew what it was doing and wasn’t just fucking ravenous for human pussy, “I may not know much about my own body, but I have seen and watched humanity fornicate for thousands of years. I have seen sex acts between humans that have not been repeated since Sodom.” It adjusted itself so that it could more easily position its mouth near the human’s crotch area. He was now fully naked. The Seraph thought he looked pretty damn attractive, although admittedly it had no idea what human beauty standards consisted of these days. If it were being honest with itself, it had always found humans attractive. Yet another reason it enjoyed coming down to Earth, it supposed. But those feelings were something that the Seraph was only really beginning to unpack now.
“Oh really?” The human looked intrigued, “Well then, angelface, show me what you got.” He spread his legs so that the Seraph could have more access to his pussy. “Just as a… reminder… it feels better when-”
“When I am… gentle?” It said, with very sexually charged intensity. “Human, I will be nothing but gentle with you.”
“Hey, I was ALSO going to say you could probably fit a finger in me.” He teased, feeling a little awkward standing up with his legs spread like this. Almost as if it read his mind (could it do that? God he hoped not,) it summoned three more astral hands: two to grab his thighs and another to support his back, sweeping him entirely off of his feet and holding him up in the air. It held his legs wide apart so it could advance forward; he was now inches away from the Seraph’s mouth. “W-wow, you really weren’t lying, this is quite the sex act.” The Seraph took in the sight of his pussy in all its glory. It had only grabbed him like that to make his pusy more immediately accessible, as it wanted this, and wanted it now. It could tell he was enjoying it; his pussy was soaked, he was breathing heavily, and he was making small noises of pleasure while it stroked him. It really, really liked what it was seeing.
“You look divine,” it said, “I cannot wait to taste you.”
“Then don’t waaaaIT!” he screamed, as it opened its mouth and began to experimentally lap at his sex with its, count em’, three tongues. “Oh, shit! Fuck, aah, fuck, that’s, oh God,”
He tasted like copper and iron, which to a Seraph is evidently like fucking CANDY. Its many eyes SHOT open with the revelation that he tasted fucking good.
“Oh, Lord almighty,” it managed to say.
It pushed one of its three tongues into his pussy, eating him out like it was starving. It kind of lost all control once it got more of that taste in its mouth, it stopped caring about anything it had seen humans do before, and started using its tongue to thrust deeper into him, licking and tasting every square centimeter it could, down to the cervix. Fuck, it thought, I used to not understand why humans fornicated, but now I cannot believe they stayed off each other long enough to build a society!
“Taste good?” He asked, holding onto the feathers on its head to try and hold himself up. “S-slow down a little, angelface,” he asked, and the Seraph did its very best to pull itself together and reduce the speed at which it was devouring him. It focused some more attention on his t dick to try and make it easier to slow the pace; doing more things at once and all. It really enjoyed the way his dick felt on its tongue, and the human was already starting to get close.
With a few dozen more thrusts of its tongue as deep in his pussy as it could get it, and a few more passes over his dick, he came, squeezing around it and trying his best not to fall off of his delicate perch. It continued to tongue fuck him through his orgasm, but the human honestly couldn’t tell if the Seraph knew or cared that he’d just cum. It just kept going.
“Okay, aah, alright, angelface,” he tried to say, “I came already, I’m sensitive!”
“I do not want to stop yet,” it said, although it did pull its tongue out of him as a courtesy before saying that. “Can I make you cum more than one time?” It lapped at his pussy as if it really couldn’t make itself stop between sentence fragments.
“You can,” He said, “But you’re gonna have to put me down first, I can’t hold myself up in that position forever.”
The seraph lowered him down onto the rock face so his back was on the ground, his hips still held up to the level of the Seraph’s mouth, and delved down again, this time focusing more on the outside of his pussy. It explored his soft pink folds with curiosity and lust, eagerly lapping at his wetness. It really hoped this wasn’t just going to be a one time thing.
It didn’t take long for him to cum a second time, writhing underneath the creature and securing his legs tightly around its head to hold it in place, not that it was going anywhere. It kept licking him until he was pushing its head away in overstimulation.
“Fuck, angelface, you’re good.” He praised, the seraph reaching its tongue out for one last little taste of his pussy. “Really good, you’ve really never done that before?”
“Never,” it said, “but I would be lying if I said that I had never thought of doing something like this.” It eyed his pussy, still ravenous for more. But it had promised to stop, and it was not going to go back on that promise. It wanted maximum chances for this whole thing to happen again.
“Maybe you’re just naturally talented, haha.” He laughed. “Here, come down here and cuddle with me. Or uh… y’know, it’s kind of getting dark. Do you wanna spend the night at my place?” The seraph would probably fit on his bed, he thought, which was a large mattress on the floor. He hadn’t bothered to get a bedframe and had spent the extra money on getting a bigger bed instead. The seraph’s wings took up most of its body size anyway.
“Will I fit in your home?” It said.
“Yeah, probably. You might have to squeeze your wings through the door frame but then you’ll be alright, at least for a night. Then you can go, move along the earth again and see more of this world. I don’t want to keep you stuck in just one place, I just want to spend this night with you.” He explained.
“You do not need to convince me, I would be glad to spend the night in your bed.”
The pair gathered the things the human had come with and began the walk back to his home, which was a shitty one bedroom house in a rural mountainous area. The seraph did struggle to get in through the door, but only a bit, and soon enough it was inside. It didn’t feel too cramped in there. Houses had really changed since it had last been inside one, it thought, and it cringed a little seeing his shrine to Dionysus in the living room (which he set his bong on as they walked in.) It was a bit afraid of Gods.
They laid down in bed together as best they could, the Seraph beginning to purr as the human snuggled into it.
“What’s your name, by the way?” The human asked, “Or do angels not have names?”
“I am called Aethriel, but I am coming around to ‘angelface’.” It confessed. “I would also like to know your name.” It asked, in the quiet silence of the night.
“My name is Isaiah.” He said.
“...I am so, so dead.” The Seraph said, resolving not to think about it too much as it drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

After the night was over, the Seraph called Aethriel left the human Isaiah’s home. He was asleep when it left, as it did not sleep for long, and the guilt from the prior day was starting to get to it. Its mind raced. When would God find out? Would God find out? What now? And worst of all, after having one orgasm, it noticed that its need for more was ever present and growing. As it flew across the landscape that day and the next, it had to stop and land multiple times just to touch itself, which became an increasingly long affair each time. None of these times was the Seraph able to bring itself to completion. It felt like it got close a few times, tantalizingly close, even, but it just couldn’t figure out how to get all the way… there. It was beyond frustrated. By the fourth day of this, it was becoming desperate. It had seriously considered appearing to and propositioning multiple humans it saw while furiously jerking off on the ground, before becoming horrified with itself and taking off again in further shame. It felt as though that first orgasm had knocked something into place for it on a biological level, like it had triggered some kind of hormonal release causing this change to its sex drive.
By day five, it was exhausted both physically and mentally from the amount of arousal it was experiencing. After pitifully and desperately trying to get off by grinding on a particularly smooth rock that it had covered with a blanket (and failing, only managing to edge itself to tears,) it resolved that it had no choice but to return to Isaiah for help.
When it arrived at his home, he was not there. It circled the house impatiently for the next several hours, and toyed with the idea of actually revealing itself to another human for help, before his run down truck finally pulled into the driveway. It excitedly greeted him at the door, coming down from the sky and landing a few yards away before hopping the rest of the way to him.
Isaiah, on the other hand, was initially terrified to be seeing the Seraph again. Over the past few days he had convinced himself that entire experience had just been a really weird trip, and that there was no fucking way he had gotten stoned and railed another angel of the lord on his day off.
“Holy shit, you’re back?” He asked, “Wait, you’re REAL? What the fuck?”
“Be not afraid, Isaiah,” it assured him, excitedly flexing its wings instinctively. It looked to Isaiah almost like a mating display of some kind, the way it flashed the iridescent feathers underneath its wings. Did it always have those? Maybe all those moving patterns he was seeing while tripping balls were obscuring his view of them. “It is good to be in your presence again.”
“Same to you, dude. Did you wanna hang out?” He asked. Hey, if this wasn’t a trip, at least the angel was cool. This wasn’t the first time something similar to this, albeit significantly less sexy, had happened to him.
“I, ah, I actually have a favor to ask of you.” It said.
“Oh? What kind of favor?”
“I have returned in hopes that, ah, you would be willing to have mercy on me,” It explained, feeling complete humiliation trying to ask for what it wanted.
“Like, forgive you? For what?” The human asked.
“No, like a… favor. Of a… sexual nature…” It tried its best to explain through the humiliation. “Human, I do not know what you have done to me, but I cannot bear it any longer. Ever since you knew me, I have been… insatiable. It is maddening.”
“Oh, so you’re back for more, I see.” He teased, scratching Aethriel’s feathers on its head like a little cat. As much as it tried to suppress it, that gentle touch got it started with the purring. “Just couldn’t stay away? I’ve heard that one before. Come on inside, angelface, let’s see what I can do. After dinner of course.”
“I went thousands of years without feeling such strong urges, and now I must land every few hours while flying to… attempt to quell the flames…” It said. “What is happening to me?” Trying to speed up the process, it grabbed his backpack out of the car.
“Keeping in mind I’m not an angel biologist, and I have no idea how your body works, my best guess is that somehow losing your virginity triggered like, a mating season type thing for you, like heat or rut.”
“That… would make sense,” The Seraph said. Maybe the ability to create offspring was given to angels to make repopulating their numbers easier. God did tend to get angry and destroy His angels at a rate that was not terribly sustainable.
The pair went inside together, and Isaiah began taking out ingredients and a pot as soon as he put his stuff down. The Seraph’s heart sank. This could take him hours!
“Are we not going to…?” Asked Aethriel, shifting on its feet.
“Don’t you want dinner first?” Isaiah asked, with that teasing tone the Seraph knew very well. “Look at you, so impatient. You told me you’ve been like, jerking off constantly for the past few days, surely you can wait a few more hours.”
“I have not been able to… finish.” It explained, in shame. “I assure you, if I had been able to handle this on my own, I would not have sought you out again. I do not want to disrupt your way of life.”
“Hey, I’m not complaining.” He said, “I’m glad you’re here. I like you.” He began adding ingredients to the pot on the stove. “Plus I’m very intrigued by your whole situation, Aethriel. You mean to tell me you’ve essentially been edging yourself for the past five days while experiencing a mating cycle? Your first mating cycle, apparently, in your multi-thousand year existence?”
“Y-yes, you could put it like that.” It said.
“And that you got so desperate, after what I can only imagine was some serious jerking off, that you felt you had no choice but to come back here? To buttfuck nowhere, to me, to get the relief you needed?” He started cutting up carrots. God damn it, the Seraph thought, this is not going to be a quick recipe, and he was going to make it work for its release.
“I suppose that is what happened, yes.” It admitted.
“Y’know, I think I want to hear more.” He said, in that damn teasing voice again. “I want to know exactly what incident sparked this surprise visit. When did you realize you weren’t gonna be able to deal with it alone?” He put the carrots into the pot, then started with the onion. Aethriel folded up its legs and sat down on the kitchen floor, as near to Isaiah as it could, hiding its central eye in the corner between two cabinets. “When did you realize you needed help from your favorite Prophet?” That little comment sent sparks flaring up across the Seraph’s back. The word “PROPHET” bounced around in its admittedly very empty right now head.
“My favorite Proph-” It slammed its head into the counter trying to whip around and look at Isaiah. Prophet? Well, he is kind of like a Prophet. He at least implied a few days ago that Aethriel was not the first angel he’d seen. That would technically make him a Prophet, even if he didn’t want to be, even if he actively disliked God. “Um…” He looked down at Aethriel.
“What, you don’t want to call me a prophet? Is that crossing a line?” He said, wiping tears out of his eyes from cutting up the onion. The Seraph was unaffected by the onion as far as he could tell.
“No, no…the back to back blows of being asked to regale you of the story you would like to hear, and then you calling yourself my f-favorite Prophet… it is a lot to take in. Especially in this state.” It admitted. “I am… very… aroused.”
“Ah, so I found yet another kink you’re into. Noted.” He said, going back to the cutting board. “Go ahead and answer my question.”
“Do I have to?” It said, again hiding its “face” in the corner. “I am embarrassed.”
“That’s the fun of it, angelface.” Replied Isaiah. “I wanna hear your embarrassing little story, then I’ll help you with your little heat problem.” The onions went into the pot. The Seraph was silent for a few moments, in which time Isaiah was poised to apologize and tell it that it didn’t have to tell him if it really didn’t want to, but before he could open his mouth, it started the story.
“I was getting desperate. I already tried using my hands so many times, I do not know how you did it. I was unable to fit my hand where you fit yours. I was unable to achieve orgasm using only external stimulation with my hands, either, although I got close, oh, I got so terribly close. But those failed attempts only made the desire greater. It became unbearable. So I took a blanket and spread it over the top of a rock, and…” It trailed off, embarrassment flooding its chest. “...and I just… kind of… rubbed my cloaca up against it… and that worked very well. For a little while.” It said. It mustered the courage to look up at Isaiah, who was adding more ingredients to the pot with unnecessary intensity, like he was forcing himself to remain attentive to his cooking. “But I was not able to, uh, finish that way either. The worst part was that it was so easy to get CLOSE to finishing, I must have done that twelve times. But I could not get… there. If I went any harder it would have felt unpleasant. But the amount of pressure I was using was not enough. I fell exhausted to the ground in shame and tears, and I wished you were there beside me. It was humiliating.” It explained.
“Poor thing, you edged yourself unintentionally twelve fuckin’ times? In a row, or were there like, multiple separate attempts?” He asked.
“...In a row.” It admitted, settling onto the ground lower, as if that would hide its shame.
“Haha, that is so fuckin’ adorable.” Isaiah replied, pretending to focus on the soup. His mind was going wild. “But, it seems like what you described might be a good way for you to try and self-pleasure.” He said. “Did rubbing yourself on something feel nice?”
“...Yes.” The sparks rippled down its back again. Isaiah was grateful that the divine fire wasn’t catching other shit on fire.
“It seems like the rock was too hard. I think you should try something softer, like, I don’t know, a roll of carpet, or a couch cushion. I think that would work great for you. Honestly, depending on how big that blanket from your story was, you might have been able to just roll that up and grind on that.” It eyed his couch with fervor. “Hey, hey, wait, let me finish! I don’t want you getting even more cum on that couch. Let me finish dinner first, and then I’ll see what I can do to protect the cushions.”
“That is not fair!” It whined, “You are dangling the solutions right in front of me!”
“I am helping you, like you asked.” He said. “And if you’re good and you wait for me to be done, I’ll even let you try my vibrator.” While it did not actually know what a vibrator was, it could extrapolate what it did based on the name. And it was very interested, to say the least.
“O-okay…” It said, trying its best to remain still and calm its racing thoughts. It could feel its cloaca starting to drip onto the floor of the kitchen, and it very much hoped Isaiah would not be upset about that.
“You gonna be good for me?” He asked.
“Mhm.” It held a hand over its mouth once again, closed its central eye, and tried to just breathe. Not that it really needed to breathe, but it had noticed that breathing anyway did help it feel more calm. Isaiah took his damn time cooking dinner, making sure to brush up against Aethriel at every opportunity to do so. He even went back to the fridge to go get more ingredients and add them. On his way home from work, he was definitely not planning on breaking out the celery for this dish, but hey, it was going to make this take longer, so he went and got it.
“Damn, it is hot in here.” He said, not even looking over at the Seraph. “I’m gonna take my pants off, is that cool with you?”
“It is… cool.” It responded, feeling very hot. No sooner than when those words left its mouth did Isaiah remove his pants, then shirt, then underwear (which he made sure to throw DIRECTLY in front of the Seraph, well within range for its keen senses to pick up… everything. Its mouth began to water.) It was trying hard not to be even more of a creep than it felt like it was being… but on the other hand… “Isaiah…” It managed to start.
“Uh huh?”
“Would you be… cool… with it… if I were to…” It trailed off, reaching its hand out just enough to insinuate that it wanted to take his boxers off the floor.
“If you were to…?”
“Um, just… hold onto these, for you?” It offered, not finding the courage to say what it wanted to, which was something along the lines of “bury my face in these”. Its many eyes were trained on his body; his thighs, his hips, his scary, contradictory, but kinda hot tattoo that said “NO GODS NO MASTERS.”
“Oh I’m very cool with it. But, y’know, it would be like, super weird and creepy if you were to start like, using them to jack it or something.” Upon hearing that bit of consent, it picked up the clothing off the floor immediately. “It would just be SOOO weird if you were to start huffing them.” The sarcasm should have been obvious, but Aethriel was not excellent at picking that kind of thing up.
“Oh, o-of course, right…” It said, gripping the fabric a little too hard, bringing it up to its face just a little closer. It was starting to drool a little bit. Oh Lord, I want to drown in his pussy. Do not put his undergarments in your mouth, it told itself, do not disobey Isaiah… “who would… do such a thing …”
“But yeah, you can just hold those for me if you want. Hey, do you want to try some wine?” He asked, turning around with a bottle of pinot grigio that he was pretty sure would go okay in this soup. He poured some into the pot, then held out the bottle.
“Hmm?” It could honestly say it was doing its best, but listening to his words was getting difficult. It was still staring at his boxers, held in its shaking hand, and warring with itself about what to do with them. I must put it down, it thought, so I am not as tempted. No, I said I would hold onto them. No, that was probably just a thing he said to torment me. But I cannot just sniff his fucking undergarments in front of him while he’s watching! But I want to, so badly. But I cannot!
“Wine? Alcohol?” He was still getting no response. “Hello? Earth to Aethriel?”
“O-oh, wine?” It finally responded, forcing itself to drop the piece of clothing. “I would indeed like to try a bit of it.” It reached out to grab the bottle, but Isaiah moved it out of the way.
“Open your mouth,” he said, kneeling down on the floor to be more on level with the Seraph’s mouth. It complied, not knowing what else to do, and from the position it was in it could do nothing but accept it as Isaiah proceeded to pour what must have been a fourth of the bottle of wine into its mouth. “Don’t spill any.” He commanded. It again complied, doing its best to dutifully swallow what it was given, wanting to do a good job. After he was done, he turned around and tipped the bottle into his own mouth, drinking what must have been a semi similar amount, probably what amounted to a glass and a half.
“You know, wine does not affect me much.” Aethriel confessed, half conscious of what it was saying. “It would take a lot of wine to get me drunk. A lot more than what I have consumed.”
“Is that your way of saying you want more?” He asked, but Aethriel was splitting its now-limited attention between staring at Isaiah's ass and preventing itself from going face down in his boxers on the floor. “Angelface?”
“Hm?” It snapped back up to attention. God, it did not want to disappoint Isaiah. It wanted to be good for him, but it was just so, so tempted in so many ways. Aethriel was starting to realize that this is not an uncommon feeling for itself.
“Having trouble paying attention, angelface?” He teased, turning around so that Aethriel had a perfect view of his t dick and his hips and his scars and that expression of amusement at its suffering on his face.
“A-a little,” it confessed.
“What's on your mind? What were you thinking about doing with those?” He nudged the underwear on the ground with his foot.
“I… so desperately want to bury my face in these...” It said in horny shame, closing its eyes. “I am a pervert and a whore. My apologies.”
“Angelface, hey, eyes up here.” He snapped his fingers and the Seraph opened its eyes again. “You don’t need to apologize, I was joking with you before and I realize now you may not have understood that. If you wanna huff my panties I'm not gonna stop you and in fact I encourage it. It's fuckin’ hot. Go ahead.” He laughed. The Seraph did not need to be told twice. It was embarrassed about how much of a relief it was to be told it was permitted to do something so perverted, but at this point in its heat cycle it was not about to let that get in the way.
Aethriel picked up the clothing again and put it right up against the feathers surrounding its mouth, moaning a soft “Oh, Lord,” as it inhaled and tried its best to be subtle about reaching out a tongue to taste them. It was not subtle, despite its best efforts, and Isaiah noticed immediately. He bit his tongue to prevent himself from saying anything about it as he wanted to continue to watch. The Seraph rolled over a little bit, unable to prevent itself from grinding a little bit on the kitchen floor, which brought it frustratingly little relief. It whined pitifully as it shifted its weight against the tile. It was overwhelmed by desire for stimulation, for more wine, for another taste of Isaiah, and it was falling quickly deeper into temptation, into sin.
“Enjoying yourself?” Isaiah asked.
“Y-yes,” it managed to respond, “I am intoxicated by your… presence.”
“Presence, or dirty underwear?” He joked, stirring the pot.
“Both.” It admitted. “I want to be good. I am trying to be good. But it is very, very difficult to be patient.”
“You're doing very well though!” Isaiah praised. “I’ve always wanted to tease a sweet, innocent angel in heat and you're doing so good, being so patient for me.”
“I am far from innocent!” The Seraph protested. “I am unclean, I am impure.”
“Says who?”
“Says the Lord your- I mean, God!” It said, still drooling over Isaiah’s boxers and humping the floor, surely not the behavior of a Seraph who cares about that kind of thing anymore.
“I dunno, I feel like you're a lot more innocent than the last angel that asshole sent me.” He teased. “Would you believe it if I told you you're not even the first angel I've corrupted?”
“W-what?!” Aethriel almost lost the vice grip it had on his laundry at that statement.
“I’m not new to the game, if that's what you're asking. But honestly, sweet angel, if I tell you the story now it's gonna turn you off. So I'm gonna wait on that one.” He tasted the soup and put some more herbs in. “Just know it involved a Power, and I came out on top.” The Seraph tried hard to swallow some of the saliva pooling in its mouth, but it was not able to stop a rivulet of drool from dripping to the floor. The threads of control it had left were snapping.
“Is the soup done?”
“Not quite. It's gotta simmer for a good while.” The Seraph's heart sank again, and it emitted a low, soft whine.
“How long is a while?”
“I dunno, probably long enough to watch a movie. Wanna watch a movie with me?” He asked, a devilish smile spreading across his face. “I'll let you get up on the couch with me.”
“O-oh. Um. Yes, Isaiah, I would be honored to join you,” it replied, not really knowing much or caring much about movies, “However, may I be permitted to… try out… one of the cushions? Like you were speaking of earlier.”
“Hm… I dunno.. do you think you've earned it?”
“I… I do not know.” It replied. Shame seeped into its very bones. It did know. “My mistake, my apologies… No. I did not earn it.” It dropped his boxers, now soaked with Seraph drool, onto the floor.
“Well, if you don't think you've earned it yet, what do you think my answer is gonna be?”
“...No.”
“Good job, you're getting it now. My answer is no. Now come on, let's watch a movie.” He put a lid on the pot and scampered over to the couch, which was a damn huge couch to say the least. It was pieced together from several different modular couches, the pieces from which he'd picked up individually at garage sales and off the side of the road and such. Aethriel followed him over, picking itself up off the floor and staring longingly at the discarded laundry it’d so foolishly dropped before settling in as comfortably as it could next to the human.
Lord almighty, he looks divine, the Seraph thought, scanning the naked man with its many many eyes. He was casually reclined and barely even looking at the angel, flipping through options on some streaming platform. All the Seraph could focus its mind on was the pot on the stove, which it eyed frustratedly. Oh, for time to pass a bit faster…
“Is there anything specific you wanna watch?” He asked.
“My knowledge of the available options is limited.” It replied, with a tone very indicative of its frustration with the whole dinner situation. It sounded oh so very pouty. This absolutely delighted Isaiah. Come on, an innocent, submissive, horny, pouty little angel just begging for permission to touch itself, on HIS couch? Right next to him?
“Hmm… so you won't mind if I pick this one?” He flipped over to a three hour long documentary about the history of the Seventh Day Adventists. He’d watched this one and been underwhelmed.
“I would not like to watch that one.”
“How about this?” Another one, this one two hours long, about Christian Science.
“Not that one either.”
“How about…” He continued talking, but all Aethriel was looking at was how long these documentaries were. Why the fuck did Isaiah have a subscription to this shitty documentary streaming platform anyway? Do humans no longer enjoy entertainment?? What happened to the theater?
“How about that one?” The Seraph gingerly took the remote from his hands and selected something about 45 minutes long about AI and the job market, two things it really couldn't care less about.
“You know about AI-related job loss?” Isaiah asked.
“Okay, how about this?” Hour long documentary on deep sea hydrothermal vents.
“That’s better.” Aethriel secretly hoped he couldn't tell the reason it had picked this one. He totally could. The documentary began, and the countdown started. Ten minutes in and Aethriel was already pretty sure that it wasn’t going to be able to withstand this for the entire hour. The couch cushions were right there. Underneath it. Isaiah said all it had to do was what it did with the rock, right? They were right there. Right. There. It could feel the rough texture of the fabric like the inanimate object itself was trying to tease it, too. It truly couldn’t help but start to gently grind itself against the cushion. Oh, and that just tempted it further…
Isaiah was not about to make this any easier. He was shocked at how well behaved the Seraph was being, despite its obvious discomfort and frustration. He had purposefully made this as difficult as possible: the delays, the nudity, the thing with the boxers, the taunting, he was shocked that Aethriel had not broken down and started ripping his couch apart the second he suggested the couch cushions might be nice. He was torn, though. Should he wait and see if the Seraph could last through the whole documentary and then give it what it wants, rewarding good behavior? Or should he just force Aethriel’s hand, do something intentionally to break its last strands of self control?
He decided on a combination of the two. He was going to make the angel beg.
At the fifteen minute mark, he stretched out along the couch, resting his hand in the feathers of the Seraph’s middle left wing, between the top and middle, where his hand movements could be felt on both surfaces. When he saw the sparks of divine fire prickling along its back flare up, he doubled down, pressing his fingers into the spots he already knew almost drove it to orgasm a few days ago.
“Human,” it said, unable to look him in the eyes. If it sounded pouty before, it was REAL pouty, now.
“Yeah?” Isaiah could not disguise the delight and arousal in his voice, much to the dual arousal and frustration of Aethriel, which was exactly what Isaiah wanted.
“If you are going to touch me there, could you at least permit me to… the cushions… you promised…” It was definitely getting that slime stuff on the couch already. So much for trying to protect the cushions I guess, thought Isaiah.
“Hmm.. I dunno… you said before that you hadn’t earned it yet.”
“I have changed my mind.” It said, voice low, bordering on a growl, “I have earned it. I have been so… fucking… patient. I have done everything you asked, I have been good. I have patiently waited for your blessing. All I ask of you is mercy.”
“I mean, you DID drool all over my boxers like a weird little pervert…” He teased.
“You said that you ENCOURAGED that!” Aethriel protested. Neither of them were watching the documentary anymore, not that the angel had even started. “Isaiah, please…” The human slowly reached for the remote and turned the volume down on the TV. “You truly do not understand how this feels for me.”
“Look at me, angelface.” Another thread gone. Obliterated. Sliced open with the knife of his words. But it obeyed, locking eyes with him in an instant. He resumed his hand movements in its feathers, trailing them down to the soft iridescent patches right at the bases of its wings. It could almost hear the twang of yet another thread snapping in its mind. It dug its talons into the couch. “You've done a very good job of being patient for me,” He opened his legs, giving the Seraph a good view of his pussy, “and as your reward… you get to go down on me.”
“And the couch cushion?!” It asked, frustration very evident in its voice,
“Oh, I almost forgot. Haha. Silly me. Yeah you can fuck my couch now.”
That was all he had to say. Aethriel sunk its talons deeper into the cushion underneath it and folded it practically in half with the strength of its legs. It took a couple tries with different amounts of pressure and angles, but within ten seconds, Aethriel made it work. This was so much better than that stupid rock. The mix of friction and softness felt heavenly, good enough to eliminate any thoughts it had in its head about how embarrassing it was to be doing this right now, humping a pillow like its life depended on it and completely ignoring Isaiah's offer. Heat built low in its… gut, I guess?
“Oh, Isaiah…!” It managed to say between moans, stretching its wings out and knocking over (and breaking) the lamp on the table next to the couch.
“Does that feel good, angelface?” Isaiah asked, remembering the vibrator idea.
“Y-yes!” It replied. It was SO wet. There was a huge wet spot on the cushion, and the slick was only aiding in its masturbation adventure, really, as it added a little buffer between the rough fabric and its sensitive sex. It gripped the front of the cushion with its astral hands, shoving the cushion up and towards itself for maximum contact with its clit, frantically squeezing the cushion between its birdlike thighs rhythmically to thrust. It very much reminded Isaiah of how he used to jerk off before he discovered the magic of electric toothbrushes.
“Want me to really blow your mind?” He said, not waiting for an answer and reaching for his work backpack. He rummaged around in there while Aethriel kept pleasuring itself, drooling over his ass and his hips as he bent over. It kind of wished it could penetrate him, but, alas, the curse of internal genitalia affects all in this household. He came back up holding a pretty large wand vibrator, one of the rechargeable ones. He had spent way too much money on this a few years ago and still hadn’t regretted it.
“Is that your-”
“Vibrator?” He clicked it on and off again like he was revving an engine. “Yeah, it is.”
“W-wait, wait!” The Seraph said, and Isaiah advanced no further. “I think it will be too much if you use that on me directly.” It admitted. “I am so, so sensitive down there right now…”
“Who says I’m using this on your pussy, angelface?” He said, deviously. God, it loved when he called it its pussy. It thought using the term was so archaic and base, what it had was so much more complicated than that, but having it reduced to only one function? Hot.
“Where else, hhh, would you put it?” It asked.
“Well, you have a choice. I can hold it against the pillow itself so you’re basically riding the world’s lowest tech sybian, or, I can use it on your pretty little wings.” He suggested. “Or if you’re too overwhelmed by this, I can put it away, we don’t have to-”
“Wings!” It exclaimed, “Wings, please, oh, Isaiah, please, please put it there…!”
“Hehe, okay, angelface,” He praised, “As you wish. Just relax for me…” He put the tip of the wand right underneath its left middle wing joint and turned it on the lowest setting.
That did it. It was only able to last for about five more seconds with the vibrator on its wings, and its eyes rolled to the back of its head as it came. Y’know when you cum really, really hard, and you get that feeling of ringing in your ears and your vision goes all weird? That was what this Seraph was experiencing right now. Divine fire arched across its back and down its wings, and a bit of slick squirted out from around the tight seal it had made between its cloaca and the couch cushion. It was babbling again in a language Isaiah was born about 4000 years too late to understand, and despite how strongly the orgasm seemed to have affected it, it did not stop grinding on the pillow, although it did slow its movements just a bit.
“Feeling better?” Isaiah asked, watching as the Seraph continued to needily rub itself against the couch. He turned off the vibrator.
“A-another,” It said, “I need another,”
“You want to cum again?” It did what Isaiah could only assume was the Seraphim version of nodding its head yes. “You want to use the cushion? Vibrator? My face?” He offered.
“Any of those are acceptable, as long as you are touching me. Please, come closer.” It responded. It really just wanted to get off and be close to Isaiah, and it didn’t much care how. What the two beings settled on was a continuation of what was already happening with some slight positional modifications. Aethriel continued its destruction of Isaiah’s upholstery while Isaiah switched positions, planning on lying almost across its back (on the insistence of Aethriel, who desperately craved closeness,) to fuck with its feathers and its wings while he used the vibrator on himself. The idea was that the vibe would also stimulate the Seraph if he got it in the right place, and if he didn't, then it wouldn't be unpleasant as a back massage.
“Uh… You’re not going to burn me, are you?” Isaiah asked, holding himself in an awkward position as to not touch the flames rippling across its back.
“I would never!” It said, sounding offended.
“So like, okay, I can touch the fire and it won’t burn me, is what you’re saying?”
“You can touch the fire.” It explained, unsure of why he was so confused. The last thing it wanted to do was hurt him. Trusting the Seraph, he fully reclined on top of its back, across the fire, and was pleasantly surprised to learn that it didn’t burn. It felt hot, but not any worse than a hot tub. He turned up the volume on the TV. This was really nice.
He ran his fingers through its feathers and across its wings, slowly and gently. Now that he was actually looking, he could see what the Seraph was talking about when it had mentioned the wrath of God a few days ago. Hidden in the feathers were places where none grew in anymore; stripes of scarred flesh as if it had been sliced open or perhaps beaten or burned, if burning a Seraph was even possible. He still had a lot of questions about the fire, to be honest.
There were about five or six scars like this on its back, ranging from one that Isaiah could barely see even when parting its feathers, to one that he was shocked he didn’t notice earlier, as it was slightly visible even without him touching the Seraph at all. It was an area where the feather growth pattern didn't quite line up viewed from afar, but with the feathers parted to get a better look, Isaiah could see the multi foot long and almost two inch wide scar that disrupted the feather growth. It wrapped around its bottom right wing, a wing that he was just now noticing was very slightly differently shaped and angled than the other ones, like it had healed after being grabbed and twisted. How the fuck did I not notice this? Thought Isaiah. I guess I mostly focused on its other five wings, and the fisting was probably a distraction too. He definitely wasn't going to say anything about it now though, and he kept his hands moving so as not to bring the obviously traumatic memory to its attention.
The two beings paid varying amounts of attention to the documentary while they continued their cuddling and mutual masturbation. It was in a very soft, horny, and intimate mood after the relief of getting to cum after so much teasing. Isaiah was honestly done with cumming after his first orgasm, but Aethriel spent the entire rest of the documentary run time grinding on the couch cushion and making all kinds of soft, horny noises while it came over and over and over again to Isaiah's gentle touch, encouragement, and praise. By the thirteenth time it was just kind of whimpering quietly and gently rocking its hips, more out of habit than desire for another round. It drifted through the afterglow, listening to Isaiah call it “sweet angel” and feeling him rub its back. The credits had already rolled, but Isaiah was more than entertained by how the Seraph reacted so positively to his presence and to his voice. It hadn’t been lying, it had really needed this, badly.
“How are you feeling now, sweet angel?” Isaiah asked.
“Good. Very good…” it responded, slowing its movements down to a halt. “I am so grateful for you, my Prophet.”
“Hehe, and I am grateful for you, angelface. You did so well.” He praised, giving it a little kiss. As Aethriel dismounted the cushion he could almost hear how fucking wet it was. It was half soaked with angel cum and he was almost certain it was beyond saving. “I’m probably gonna have to get rid of that couch cushion, but, I mean. Hazards of the trade, I guess.” He joked.
“I will clean your couch, I give you my word.” The Seraph promised. “I am literally a Seraph, I do have some power, especially the ability to purify with fire. But first, I would very much like to kiss you.” it confessed.
“I do wanna make out with you,” He assured it, “but isn't that going to incinerate the entire thing?” He asked.
“No, why would it?”
“Because lighting shit on fire tends to turn it into a pile of ashes.” Isaiah explained.
“I can choose what I want to burn. It is very simple for me, watch.” It said. It reached out an astral hand to pick up and set back up the lamp it had broken earlier, sans the glass from the shattered bulb. Isaiah dismounted the Seraph to lean over the side of the couch and watch as the pieces of glass burst into flames, melted, and reassembled into a different shaped but functional bulb. Aethriel screwed it back into the lamp and turned it on. The light shone brighter than it had before it had been broken.
“Holy shit, that's really cool!” He said, flipping the light on and off and on and off again. “Wait, can you do that with other stuff?”
“Some things, yes, but not all.” It said, delighting in his excitement over a “miracle” that took so little effort.
“Can you fix my truck windshield?” he asked.
“...Can we ‘make out’ first?” it asked, desiring closeness.
“Oh yeah, no, that was never a question,” Isaiah said, “I’m not going to tease you to tears and then make you fix my windshield as aftercare.”
He sat back on the couch, much closer to the Seraph, and then realized he had no idea how this was going to work. Aethriel could probably fit Isaiah’s head in its mouth if it was really trying, plus it was more of a strange, vertically placed slit than a mouth in the traditional sense. He tried to use his old tactic of ‘just do it, ask questions later”. He moved in for a kiss, kind of expecting the Seraph to take the lead on this one.
The Seraph gently placed a hand behind his head, and another on his lower back. It pulled him in and kissed him very sweetly, or, as sweetly as it could with the biological limitations they both possessed. It was soft and gentle and all around pleasant. They parted only slightly, looking at each other, before they came back together again, unable to tolerate being apart in the moment. Kisses are nice, Aethriel thought. This is… nice. They started the makeout session with these slow, soft, gentle kisses, enjoying each other’s calm. It could almost be labeled innocent so far. Isaiah found a position he felt really comfortable in and Aethriel did its best to support his body in that pose.
Soon enough, all the Seraph could think about was what it’d seen humans do together when it came to kisses. It found itself desperately wondering what his tongue felt like touching its. In a moment of weakness, it hesitantly tested its limits by pressing its tongue ever so slightly against Isaiah’s lips. Isaiah put up no resistance whatsoever, and allowed it entry.
His mouth was a lot softer and less dangerous than a Seraph’s, Aethriel thought. He had teeth that were mainly meant for eating plants, and only one row of them. He tasted like the herbs from the soup he was making when he had tried some earlier. He moved his tongue to play with Aethriel’s, swirling them around each other, which almost made the Seraph dizzy.
This was good. This was what goodness was. Not tireless and endless praise and dirty work, not that too bright, too loud throne room, this. This was heaven.

Chapter Text

“Oh, no, I almost forgot!” Isaiah pulled back. They’d been making out for like half an hour and the pot on the stove was boiling over. “Shit, let me go get that.” He got off the couch and scrambled to the kitchen to turn off the burner and take the pot off the stove. He tasted the broth, keenly aware of Aethriel’s stare on his back, or more specifically his ass. Liking the way it tasted, he poured a bowl for himself and another for the Seraph, and brought them over to the couch. “Here you go, soup.”
“That is so kind of you,” the Seraph said, “it smells very nice. However, I do not eat.”
“Are you unable to eat, or do you just not like it?” He asked, blowing on the soup to cool it.
“I am able, I just…” it wasn't sure how to explain this. “I am supposed to be fasting.”
“For a holiday, or…?”
“Always.” The Seraph explained. “We do not engage in consumption of foodstuffs in reverence and fear of God.”
“And eating pussy doesn't count as breaking a fast???”
“... You make a good point,” the Seraph said, picking up the bowl and tipping it so it could drink the soup. The last time it had eaten anything had been hundreds of years ago, and the experience had not been a good one, so it was hesitant to try this. After a small sip, it confirmed the soup was delicious, albeit a little under-seasoned, and one small sip turned into it finishing the bowl in under a minute. “That was very nice,” it praised, “You are an excellent cook.”
“Want more?”
“I could not possibly ask you to-” It saw Isaiah's look of mild disapproval and changed its mind, feeling hungrier, “... yes please.” Isaiah brought it another bowl of soup, and watched as it sipped the liquid, like it was cherishing every drop.
“Hey,” he said, the anger he felt at God rising in his chest, “I just want to say I'm sorry God treated you like such shit. That was fucked up and I'm glad you're here with me instead of dealing with that bullshit up there.” He pointed to the sky. “I want you to know you're safe here.” It almost choked on the soup.
“Is this… related to my scars?” It asked after a short silence, no longer making eye contact.
“Uh, well… a little. It's about the fasting, too.” Isaiah said. “Shit, you noticed that I saw…?”
“I have eyes on my wings, Isaiah. Yes, I noticed.” It said. Its bowl of soup was empty again, and Isaiah got up to refill it. “Besides, with you up so close to me and with your hands doing what they were doing, you were bound to notice even if I did not see it.”
“I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have brought it up, that's on me.” He apologized. “Let's eat, and then we can cuddle together in bed if you're alright with that.”
“No, it is not like that, I am not … traumatized” Aethriel said. “I am only worried that you will get the wrong idea of me, and consider me a rebellious angel or an evil one.”
“...what do you mean by that?” Isaiah said, bringing it more soup and sitting back down beside it.

“The larger scar, that one was my own fault. It is the smaller ones I am referring to when I said that I was punished for minor infractions. Mostly for flying… wrong.” It explained. “I was not intentionally disobeying God. And every angel has these scars. None of us are perfect. But we are damn close after enough of those lashes, and the stigma that comes with them.”
“So you're telling me that every angel is beaten with a lash?” He asked.
“It is more like a burst of energy in the shape of a lash. It is smiting. It is like lightning. It burns terribly, like hellfire.” Aethriel explained. “But yes, you would be hard pressed to find an angel without a single mark. I may have a few more than the average Seraph, but… that is not because I am particularly sinful. At least, I wasn’t previously.” It said, sipping from the bowl.
“Can I ask what exactly happened for you to somehow deserve the beating you seem to think you deserved?” He asked. Aethriel was hesitant, but… it had not spoken of this with anyone, ever. It had been a thousand years since the incident. And honestly, it did really want to tell someone it trusted.
“Back then I was a good Seraph. I had a good friend who was also a Seraph. His name was Niamie. He was a much younger Seraph than I, he had been created to replace a Seraph who had been cast out of heaven within the past hundred years. We sang together and we had many happy memories. One day, God destroyed him. And in my anguish, I asked God why. I said, ‘Why did you destroy Niamie? He was so young! Surely he could learn to correct whatever he did to wrong you!”
God held out His hand and it was as if an arc of lightning gripped my very soul. It spread down my back and wrapped around my wing, it was searing hot and it burned my flesh terribly. He held me in the air like that, in front of everyone, by my wing. The force He used tightened around my wing and began to crush it, twisting and slowly pulling it out of the socket as He shook me, and He brought me up to His face level, and screamed at me in a voice louder than anything I have ever heard,

“YOU WILL NOT QUESTION THE LORD YOUR GOD!”

I was terrified and in more pain than I ever had been. I screamed and cried, and had to beg for forgiveness incessantly for what felt like hours while he screamed and raged and toyed with my very existence. Finally, He said something about how I would not be worth the effort to replace.
He flung me back down to His feet. I had to open my wings despite the injury to stop my fall, and he had thrown me so hard that it did hurt, very badly, to do so. He continued to scream at me, about how He should have destroyed me as well, and that I should be thankful and praise him for being so loving and forgiving and having mercy on me.
Worst of all, all the other Seraphim saw everything. None of them wanted to associate with me much after that, besides snippets of polite conversation, as they did not want to be associated with me and thus risk their own injury.” It explained. It was trying its very best not to cry, but oh, the tears fell anyway. Isaiah had absolutely no idea what to say or do to comfort the poor Seraph, but his first instinct was to try and give it a hug. It pressed its body closer to his, craving his touch. When it said all this out loud, it started to have some thoughts it hadn't had before when it had been repressing the experience out of shame.
“It took so long to heal. I am shocked that it healed at all, as I had no choice but to fly on that wing directly following the injury. I popped it back into the socket myself and tried to rest my bottom pair of wings for a while, but… when God noticed, that is how I got my second scar. I was told that I should be thankful that the injury hurt as it was a reminder to be faithful to God. That one I no longer believe was my fault. I was injured. I simply wanted to heal. And it never truly did heal all the way, but I have learned over the centuries and through multiple punishments to fly in a way that makes it look like it is fine. That way, I was still eligible to be sent to Earth, albeit less often than the others…”
“Still eligible…?” Isaiah asked.
“... I knew a Cherub once that had one of her four heads cut from her body as a punishment. After that she was relegated to only work inside heaven as a recordkeeper, as God did not want the humans to see her, as she was… damaged.” Aethriel explained. Isaiah looked at Aethriel in disbelief. “God delegates almost all of His work to the angels to do for Him.”
“No, that's not the part of that sentence that I'm confused about, angelface.” Isaiah said. “I just… when you said He was violent to His angels… I didn't understand just how violent. Aethriel, that is absolutely terrible. I don't have the words to tell you how sorry I am that you had to go through that. And I hate to be the one to tell you this but. You definitely are traumatized.”
“But I should not have questioned Him!” Aethriel explained. “Even if the response itself was an overreaction, I knew better than to question the Lord and I did so anyway! I was stupid. I was reckless. I brought it on myself. You do not put your hand into the mouth of a bear and expect to get it back in one piece.”
“There’s very little you could’ve done that could possibly warrant such cruel treatment, and asking a reasonable question is definitely not enough to warrant even a fraction of that harm.” Isaiah said. “The physical harm alone is inexcusable. Not to mention the continued physical punishment and abuse, psychological abuse, and public nature of the punishment that made others fear association with you. That is cruel. That is unusual. That isn't right. It's fucking evil.”
“But I knew better.” It said, weakly.
“So what? I knowingly told my boss he was a cunt a few weeks ago and he didn't beat the shit out of me, or injure me in any way. Should I have done that? Probably not. Did he have any right to physically harm me? Hell no! So he, as a reasonably well adjusted adult, told me I was a cunt and said ‘get the fuck out of my ambulance!’ But I still work there! I'm still a paramedic! And my coworkers still talk to me even though I called my boss an idiot cunt and they know he kinda doesn't like me now. Because retaliation for shit like that is psychopathic.” Isaiah said. “No loving God would do that to his own goddamn angels. Love should not and does not look like that. He did not and does not love His angels. That’s horrific, and it's unquestionable abuse.”
“... I feel sinful saying this but… I agree with you.” Said the angel. “I… do not think he harmed me out of love. I believe he was simply angry with me. I think… I think I always knew in the back of my mind, and the shame was simply too great to accept that truth until this very week. It was just so frightening. If I let myself think He did not love me, and that this pain was not mercy, I would have feared much more for my life.” It managed to say. “If he did not love me, then who would? The isolation that followed the incident simply made it all the worse, Isaiah, I have not had meaningful conversation in a thousand years. I do not know what the other Seraphim speak of anymore.” Its shoulders heaved with its sobs. Isaiah held it closer.
“Hey, I’m here. I’m here, sweet angel.” Isaiah said. “I got you. You’re safe here.”
“Thank you. I owe you.” It said, holding him closer.
“You don’t owe me shit.” He said. “I care about you, I’m here for you. That’s the end of it.” They stayed there for a good while on the floor of the living room, holding each other while Aethriel cried. It felt oddly good to cry, the Seraph thought. It felt as if at least part of a great weight was being lifted from its soul, and all it wanted to do was live here, in this moment.
“Can we perhaps move back to the couch?” Aethriel asked, quietly. “This position is not very good for me.”
“Oh, yeah, of course.” Isaiah replied. He helped the angel to its feet, and it used that divine fire trick to remove all the cum from the couch cushion before getting back on the couch.
“I am so sorry for bringing the mood down in this way after… what the original plan for this meeting was.” Aethriel apologized. It didn’t know how it was going to bring up that its heat was not over.
“No, no. Don’t apologize.” Said Isaiah. “First of all you don’t have to apologize for reaching out for help or having trauma. Secondly, good sex can bring out fucked up emotions. I get it.”
“I suppose,” the Seraph said, adjusting itself on the couch as it was still a little uncomfortable.
“Does your wing hurt?” Isaiah asked, watching it shift.
“... That is a complicated question, human.” It replied. “The short answer is no, I am fine.”
“What’s the long answer?” Isaiah asked.
“... It always hurts.” It responded. “Most of the time it is some degree of bearable, some of the time it is almost imperceptible, some of the time it is unbearable and feels like the injury itself is happening all over again. But still I fly. I am alright.”
“Does anything make it feel better?”
“In all honesty, I have not had the opportunity to try to make it better. Please, do not be distressed. I am very used to this.” It really did not want to make Isaiah feel bad for it.
“Did it hurt when I was touching your wings?”
“No, your hands felt very pleasant on my wings!” It responded. “If anything, it lessened the pain.”
“Maybe that would be a good way to help you feel better when it hurts.” Isaiah suggested. “How about temperature? Have you tried cooling it down or heating it up?”
“I have tried making my flames burn hotter in the area, but that made it sting and burn.” It explained.
“Let me try something.” He said, getting up and going to grab some ice packs out of the freezer. “Can I put these on you?”
“You can try.” It said, skeptical and a bit embarrassed. He placed the ice packs where it looked like it was the most damaged, at the junction of the wing and its body and along the under and topside of it where it was missing a few feathers. The cold felt strangely…good. It was very soothing. While he definitely didn’t make it stop hurting entirely, Isaiah’s actions had cut the pain down from a four to like a two out of ten. It softly sighed.
“Is that helping at all?”
“Actually, yes.” It confessed. “I hate to ask for even more from you, but, um. Would you mind trying to, um, massage that area as well?”
“Is it going to turn you on too much?” He asked, “I don’t want to tease you.”
“It is unlikely to me that that area of my body could possibly feel any pleasure.” It responded. “Please, do not let that be a barrier.”
“Of course.” He used firm but gentle pressure with his thumbs on the area, being careful not to press directly on the joint or be too rough. This wing junction felt completely different under his hands than the other ones he had messed around with. It looked and felt to him like it was not truly in the right place, and that it was only shallowly in the socket or potentially slightly dislodged. Although he was sure there was also some underlying damage to the bone and tissue if it had been crushed and twisted… this didn’t look THAT different from the shoulder dislocation he’d brought to the ER the other day.
“That feels… incredible.” The Seraph said. The relief in its voice was palpable.
“...Hey, I don’t mean to give you false hope or anything. But, I actually think I know what the issue is.” He said. “I mean, I’m not entirely sure, but as I said, I’m a paramedic. I think your wing isn’t all the way back in the socket.”
“...What.” It said.
“I mean, I think you got it almost all the way back in and it either popped back out, or you never got it all the way in in the first place.” He said. “Honestly it would probably have been impossible for you to get it in alone. You’ve got wings that move differently than a human shoulder and definitely have different anatomy… I think I can help you. But it’s going to hurt, really, really bad.” He cautioned.
“You mean to tell me I have suffered for so long from something that is… fixable?” It asked.
“I mean, I don’t know if it’s fixable.” He said. “For all I know, the reason it isn’t back in the socket is because it doesn’t fit back in the socket. But yeah, if this is just a dislocation it could probably be popped back in and that would reduce the pain.”
“I cannot believe this.” It said, “I… If I had known… I would have done anything, I would have begged the other Seraphim for help, I would have risked punishment to come to Earth and have a human try…”
“I feel like you’re not listening to the part where I said it’s going to hurt really fucking bad and I don’t know if it’s going to work.” He reiterated.
“I heard you.” It said.
“And that I don’t know if it's possible.”
“I want to try. The only outcome I could not cope with is permanently increased pain,” It said.
“If that happens I could, and I know this is really bad, but in that case, I could try and pop it back out of the socket to where it is now.” He suggested. “And don’t think this is a total cure or anything. This is an old and complicated injury, and there is a very high likelihood that even if I do it correctly, that it will only make the pain less bad, not disappear.”
“I am okay with that.” It said, “Any reduction in pain is a benefit.”
“Alright.” Isaiah said. “I need to look at some videos on how to do this first because I don't know how to do this off the top of my head.”
“That does not inspire confidence in me.” The Seraph replied nervously.
“Well, then don't watch.” He said, petting the Seraph's head.
He looked up some videos on how to replace a dislocated shoulder just as a refresher. It seemed like, from a bit of web searching, that he was probably right about it being a dislocation, as apparently even a bird with one set of wings can kind of fly on a partial dislocation of the wing. It wasn’t like a human shoulder where it was just totally fucked until set. His heart was pounding. Shit. He hoped this was actually going to work. He closed his laptop.
“Okay. Let me lay down the ground rules.”
“I am listening.” It said. It was trying to heed his warning and not get its hopes up, but by God it was excited to be healed. As it had little to no understanding of current medical science, and believed he was a prophet, it honestly wasn’t coming at this from a realistic viewpoint no matter what Isaiah said.
“First and foremost, please don’t bite me. If it hurts too much, tell me and I’ll stop or pause. You do not need to bite. I have had too many goddamn people try and bite me.” He said.
“I will not bite you, I will never bite you.” It promised, hurt that he still thought it would ever do such a thing.
“Okay good. Great. Honestly that’s all the ground rules. The other stuff is just instructions,” he said. “Lie down on the floor in a comfortable position.” Wordlessly it complied. “OK. So. I need you to fold up the wing and relax ALL the muscles in and around the joint, or this isn’t going to work.” He said. “You’re way bigger and stronger than me and I will not be able to fight you. You’re gonna have to trust me and let me slide it in. I’m sorry, but this is going to hurt. Like really bad. It might hurt worse than the actual dislocation itself,” He said. “As it gets closer to sliding into place, the pain is going to get worse and worse. I’m sorry. If it’s too much, tell me, and I will pause and hold the wing where it is. But once it’s in, it should hurt a lot less.” He explained, reiterating what that doctor had said. “Here's something to bite down on, by the way,” he said, tossing a shirt to it.
“I… I understand.” it said, although it doubted anything a human could do to it would hurt as much as what God did.
“Okay. I’m going to do it now,” He said, grabbing the wing and moving it into position. He slowly and carefully began to rotate it upward and outward, using a generous amount of force in consideration of the size and strength of the angel.
Isaiah had not been lying. It did hurt, really fucking bad. It cried and bit into the shirt, forcing itself to let him do his thing, focusing on keeping its muscles relaxed. It thought, do NOT fight him! It tried to just power through the pain, but at a certain point, it realized Isaiah hadn't been exaggerating, either. It hurt almost as bad as the injury itself, then kept increasing. The bone slid over still-partially healed tissue, as it had never had the opportunity to rest long enough to heal it. It was transported right back to a much worse time in its mind. It almost felt as though it were dangling in front of God again.
“AAGH, STOP! STOP, PLEASE STOP!” It begged, and Isaiah held the wing where it was, rotated about halfway out. It was in tears, trying to hold onto its mental faculties. RELAX, it told itself, RELAX or he will not be able to put it back in! “It HURTS!” It pleaded, and was at least a little comforted by the fact that Isaiah had kept his word and stopped. The pain very slightly began to improve when he held the wing still. It was rotated out at an odd angle. Even if it were not already injured, the angle alone would be incredibly uncomfortable to hold its wing at.
“I know, angelface, I know, I’m sorry!” He said, keeping his promise and holding still. “You’re doing amazing. Can you feel it kinda sliding into place?” He asked.
“I-I guess so???” it said, trying so hard to force itself to relax. It fought to keep still.
“We’re like halfway there. I’m gonna keep going,” he said, and keep going he did. This last half hurt a bit more, but went a lot faster than the first half. It cringed as it felt bone slide against bone, it screamed and bit through the shirt entirely, but finally, FINALLY, the bone slid into place. Right away it could feel the difference, the pain went from almost a ten to a three real fucking quickly. “FUCK yeah!” Isaiah shouted, still holding the wing in place so as not to let it slide back out of the socket. “I can’t believe that worked!”
“I-Is it over??” The Seraph asked, spitting out the shirt. Its body trembled with pain and fear.
“Fuck yeah it is!” He said, gently and slowly moving the wing back into its resting position. “Okay, now, you’re gonna have to leave it like that for a good while, like, at least a few days. That was an old fuckin’ injury. To prevent it from dislocating again I think you should wait like… a few weeks at least before you try to fly on it.” He advised.
“I will do so.” It replied, exhausted.
“I’m going to like… tie your wing how it is, to your body if I can, to keep it like that while your body heals, okay?” He said.
“Okay…” it said, feeling both absolutely blissful and shaken to its core. That had been an experience. The echoes of the voice of God just wouldn't leave its brain. But it firmly believed going through that was worth it. The pain definitely wasn’t gone, but it felt way better. It had consistently been living at a 4-5/10 for centuries. And to think, this wasn’t even the least painful it was going to feel? It lay still as Isaiah went to the garage and grabbed a ratchet strap, removing the metal piece from it so he had a flat piece of material. He did his best to tie the wing in a folded position against its body as a kind of splint.
“Is that comfortable, or too tight?”
“It is perfect. It hurts noticeably less now, I am… amazed, really,” Aethriel said in a weak voice. It will likely be uncomfortable later on, it thought, but I can tolerate anything for a few days. “Thank you Isaiah.”
“...Are you okay mentally?” He asked.
“...No.” It replied, truthfully.
“Would you like to talk about it?”
“My thoughts are not pleasant right now.”
“That's okay.” He said. “I want to listen. Let's get in bed.” He offered, helping the angel to its feet and leading the way to his bedroom. Aethriel was very glad he had again offered his bed, as it was not looking forward to spending a night alone. It desperately wanted to be close to him. They laid down together, finding a position that maximized contact but allowed space for the Seraph's newly set wing to be left untouched.
“... I am relieved in a way you could not comprehend, and I am also most terrified.” It began. “It felt like I was back there, back when it happened. That horrible flashback combined with the indecent feelings from my heat cycle, combined with the knowledge that none of this can possibly end well, is terrifying. One or potentially even both of us will die before this whole thing is over. God WILL find me. I will be ripped out of the heavens once again and dangled before His prodigious form, and He will destroy me slowly and painfully, and He may destroy you too.”
Isaiah held out his arms and the Seraph scooted closer to him so he could give a hug.
“I am not ready to give this up. I am not ready to face God's wrath again.”
“Then don't. Stay here.” Isaiah said.
“If I stay here, you die too.” It lamented.
“I already told you you're not the first angel I've seen, you're not even the first angel I've fucked! If He's gonna kill me, He already would have done it after what happened with the last guy.”
“Did you not say with great pride that you took my virginity?” asked the Seraph. “As if to imply you were shocked, that this was a new activity for you?”
“Well yeah. That other angel was for sure not a virgin.” He said, like it was obvious. “When I say I corrupted the other guy, I more mean like, I purposely worked against him to make his mission fail and got him to drop the professional act long enough to make him blaspheme.”
“May I ask what circumstances surrounded this incident?!” Aethriel asked, incredulously.
“Well, he tried to convert me and get me pregnant so my son would be a prophet, but I got an abortion and almost got sent to a mental institution.” Isaiah explained casually. “Then when he came back with, no joke, a gas station pregnancy test in hand, I told him what happened and he started cursing my name and shit and telling me God was gonna be SOOO pissed, and I was like then why doesn't God come down here and tell me Himself, pussy? And then the angel complained about God making the angels do all His work for him, and then started freaking the fuck out about getting punished. So. Counts as a win in my books. I also assume that means I'm a prophet instead of my theoretical son, because that Power would not shut up about my bloodline. And I have no living siblings or cousins.”
“That sounds incredibly stressful.”
“It wasn’t so bad.” Isaiah brushed it off. “The worst part was trying to convince the medical staff that I was just really religious. A schizophrenia diagnosis would really fuck my career over. And I'm not schizophrenic, anyway.” He said. “I'm very in touch with reality and it's not my fault I'm fucking, angel bait or whatever. That's victim blaming which is uncool.”
“That is terrible.” It said, “I am sorry.”
“I got really off topic. I should be the one who's sorry. Listen. It's been a few days now. Maybe God isn't coming. Maybe He doesn't care or doesn't notice.” Isaiah desperately didn’t want to talk about the Power anymore. It was an experience he had a lot of conflicting feelings about.
“I am certain He will eventually feel my loss. He will eventually have a task for me and be unable to find me.”
“Then what will He do?”
“... Send out an angel to find me. Probably one of the Ophanim.” It said.
“Okay, and then we seduce the Ophanim. Problem solved.” He said.
“You fail to see how little that solves any problem!” The Seraph was beginning to get agitated. Was he really this naive? Why was his go-to when dealing with these situations to get horny?
“I mean, I'm 2 for 2 on that one. Every time I meet an angel, I fuck the angel or some type of sex ends up happening, and I haven't been smited yet. I'm not planning on fixing a system that isn't broken.”
“You are insane.” The Seraph said, putting its face in its hands.
“I'm successful.” He corrected. The Seraph sighed. It didn't have any better ideas. Begging God for forgiveness was off the table and wouldn't work anyway. It had considered going back to heaven and acting like nothing had happened, but the option to sneak away again might never arise and it sure as hell did not want to stay there forever. It was truly baffled at how it had gone this long without God sending a scout. It had really believed that God read the angels thoughts, regularly, and would know that it had begun to stray from Him. Otherwise it would not have run away in the first place. It thought it had one chance, one opportunity, to see the world, the Earth it loved, for itself before it was destroyed in maybe a day or two.
“I… guess you are.” It finally said. “How do you do it?”
“Fuck an Ophanim? I have no idea, I was kinda hoping you could give me some insight on that.”
“I mean how do YOU survive?” It asked. “You have been threatened with destruction, yet you still live.”
“Well, I mean… realistically what happened is my uncle died and I inherited his house because I took care of him during the last year of his life. That's most of what kept me alive.”
“I mean in terms of avoiding divine punishment.”
“I didn't. I didn't do shit.” He said. “Unless you count moving across the country to this house, like if you think maybe God lost track of me. But no, I don't think that threw God off my scent or whatever. I think God can't kill me.” He concluded. With neither of them speaking, the silence of the night was deafening. “I think everything will be okay. I really do.”
“I hope so,” Said Aethriel. Its mind was being pulled in many confusing emotional directions. It was tired. It was fearful, and yet felt so much more comfortable than it usually did, and it was enjoying the feeling of being held and laying in a soft place. It was also still pretty horny, but lacked any motivation at the moment to do anything about it.
“And if it comes down to it, I will fight God for you.” He said. Before it had a chance to object, he continued. “So… the Thrones. The Ophanim. Anything I should be prepared for, if one of them comes and tries to interrogate me?” He asked.
“Oh, right, Ophanim. Where do I begin? I… I suppose you are perfectly equipped to handle an angel encounter, baseline.” It said.
“Oh yeah. No. At this point? I got it down.” He said. “I mean like, are they assholes?”
“Yes.” It replied almost instantly.
“Like more so than other angels?”
“...Partly.” It explained. “A lot of the Thrones have big egos, because they are so physically close to God when they carry him. But they are also much less connected to angelic… underground society.”
“Please go on.”
“We are not supposed to have a society or culture beyond serving God. But we have one anyway, because we have free will, and, honestly, what does the Father expect with that kind of thing?” Aethriel said. “It is not like we do much out of line. But before I was cut off from the others, we would talk. We would have gossip. There was an outlet for our… selves, to exist outwardly, at least a little bit. I assume that the Ophanim speak to each other as well, and maybe even to the Cherubs, but their interactions are much, MUCH more closely monitored by God. Inter-choir speech is likely constantly monitored. Although, I cannot truly be certain, as I also used to believe God read the angel’s thoughts much more often than He actually does, if He does at all.”
“So you're basically saying, if I thought the Seraphim were sexually repressed…”
“The Ophanim will be moreso.” It finished his sentence for him. That idea was actually a little exciting. It thought about how that bong hit made IT feel when it had nothing to lose, and tried imagining a high and mighty God fearing Throne try to wrestle with that. Its flame burned just a bit brighter.
“Wait, are they also horny? Like, known to be horny?” asked Isaiah.
“... Are you implying that Seraphim are known to be horny??”
“You told me something along the lines of, Seraphim only have cloaca as a testament to their purity, they only exist to not be touched. To me, that implies that you assholes are horny and in denial about it.” he explained. “Also, you’re the only Seraph I know and you’re horny as fuck.”
“... Alright, you may have gotten me there.” It admitted. “I… found humans attractive before I met you. And I felt lust for other angels…” Its thoughts came back to its ever looming heat, and it tried very hard not to think about wheels within wheels. “...There is the Nephilim thing… I likely should have led with that…” It thought aloud. “So, to answer your question, yes, angels in general are horny. Especially for humans. That is how we ended up with the Nephilim. Angels came down and took humans as mates.”
“Ok. First of all… hot.” Said Isaiah. “Second of all, considering what you know about Thrones, do you think I should go for a seduction first angle, or, like, an arguing first angle, or…?”
“I think you should try arguing first, then seduction. I think a Throne would be extremely vulnerable to its ego being bruised.” It hesitated, quickly losing the mental battle. It was picturing that one Throne that had once bumped into it and given it quite the earful, going on about how it should learn to watch where it was flying and not get in the way of a Throne of God on a mission of salvation. Aethriel had responded by kindly telling it that it was in fact going the wrong direction if it wanted to reach Earth, which caused the Throne to become so flustered that it refused to acknowledge its mistake, deciding instead to take the long way around the Archives like a fool. Aethriel had watched it fly away, and while it was a little annoyed at the Throne’s rudeness at first, this was five hundred years post incident. That accidental contact, that brief conversation with an angel that didn't know of its past sin… its eyes trained on the way the Throne’s wheels rotated, the striking blue of its many eyes, the glint of divine light reflecting off its surfaces, the way its wings moved, the way its fire blazed with humiliation. It had to rip its thoughts away from getting any more specific, in fear of God. But now, with that fear removed, it was much more inclined to admit to itself that it had wanted that Throne to have its way with it.
“Okay, okay… I like what I'm hearing. I think this is doable.”
“I hope this is doable.” Aethriel said.

Chapter Text

Aethriel and Isaiah spent the next few months as fuckbuddies and kind of like roommates. The Seraph's heat ended about a day after having its wing set, but it found that even outside of heat it really enjoyed sex. Heat made it a desperate mess begging to be fucked into submission. Outside of heat, it learned it very much enjoyed switching, taking a more dominant role or a more submissive role or having no power dynamic roles. One time, they tried fighting each other for control in a “winner fucks loser” type situation and Aethriel had thoroughly enjoyed coming out on top. It had never thought before that it, an angel of the Lord, could ever say and do things dirty enough to leave even ISAIAH a blushing mess.

When Isaiah worked, or just whenever it felt like it, Aethriel would fly around and take in the sights of Earth. It had started writing a journal documenting its travels. It also started participating in its new favorite hobby: stealing shit.

Today, Aethriel came back to the house to find Isaiah gone, probably at work. It was confused, as Isaiah wasn't scheduled to work today, but it assumed he'd just been called in for some emergency reason or something. Quickly growing bored, it eyed the shelf where Isaiah kept all his esoteric religious texts and also porn DVDs.

As soon as the door opened, Aethriel practically pounced on top of Isaiah in excitement.

“You are home!” It said excitedly, “I am so glad to see you!”

“I’m glad to see you too, angelface. Today was shit. I was thinking it wasn't gonna be too bad because it was just eight hours but… God, that fucking esophageal varices guy wasn’t pretty. The dude vomited blood all over the place and was dead on arrival.” Isaiah said, setting down his bags. Aethriel nodded knowingly. It has come along with him to work one day, interested in what he did. It had been truly shocked to learn that he was basically using necromancy on a regular basis, and that it seemed to barely phase him when he had to break another human’s ribs to get their heart started, or stick a tube down someone's throat. “Hey, you figured out the DVD player all on your own, hmm?” He teased, noticing the video of two trans dudes scissoring on the TV.

“O-oh, um… my apologies.” Athriel lowered its head. “I… have no good explanation for this.” This particular DVD had been stored directly next to his copy of the book of Enoch, maybe it had been important to him in a non-horny way?

“I'm far from upset, sweet angel.” He said, putting the groceries away. “You can watch porn, I'm not God. I support your endeavors. And hey, you picked a good one. Not all my DVDs are worth watching, I'll tell you that. Even though scissoring is totally fake.” He commented.

“Scissoring?”

“Yeah, those two dudes have their pussies touching and are kinda rubbing them together, that's called scissoring.” He explained. “Usually it's portrayed with women.”

“What do you mean, it is fake?”

“I mean it doesn't actually work in real life. Like, it doesn't really feel very good. At least not as good as the actors make it seem.” Aethriel didn't want to admit that it had just kept rewinding the video to the scissoring part and watching that for the past hour. But that was in fact what it had been doing. It was a little disappointed to hear that this wouldn't really work .

“I see.”

“You sound disappointed.” Isaiah said.

“...A little bit.” It admitted. “I cannot deny that I was thinking of engaging in this activity with you.”

“Hey, doesn't mean we can't try!” He said. “One time when I was in training I scissored one of the other students while her girlfriend watched.” Aethriel pictured this so vividly in its mind that it was worried Isaiah could see its thoughts.

“W-was it… good?”

“It was good, but not like, feel-good good. It didn't feel pleasurable. It was just nice to see her girlfriend tied up watching us. She'd practically begged for the privilege.” He put his bag on the floor in the kitchen, walking over to the living room. Aethriel followed like a lost puppy.

“I would have loved to be tied up watching you two,” it said before it could stop itself.

“Well, you're not gonna have to just sit back and watch, you've got me all to yourself now!” He declared, leaning in to give the Seraph a passionate kiss. They got lost in the make out session for a good five minutes before either of them noticed the painfully fake throat clearing sound coming from the kitchen.

“AHEM.” Isaiah opened his eyes, but didn't take his mouth off of the angel’s. Well, he couldn't say that he was too shocked, but, in the kitchen was a living creature composed of wheels within wheels, two wheels to be specific. Eyes of the deepest beryl green covered its surfaces, and fire blazed from its center, concealing something within. Four small wings were folded at its sides. On its inner wheel, Isaiah noticed one empty eye socket. Yeah, that's one of the Ophanim alright. Time to lock in.

“Oh, shit, ohhh no,” he said sarcastically, only barely pulling away from the Seraph, “Oh, God, an angel of the Lord! Oh, fuck, whatever shall I do? Oh, this has NEVER happened before, super original!” Aethriel was frozen in place, frozen in fear, cursing itself for closing all of its eyes during that kiss.

“SILENCE, mortal!” The throne said in a much more authoritative voice than Aethriel’s. “SERAPH! WHAT in the name of the LORD do you think you are DOING?!”

“I-I, well, you see, I-”

“We're fucking each other.” Isaiah said, standing up. Aethriel had already pulled off his shirt and unbuttoned his work pants (which totally had blood on them,) so he was in a state of moderate undress and not ashamed at ALL. It cringed and turned away in embarrassment and fear.

“You're WHAT!!!” the Throne blazed, fire shooting out from its center in an impressive display.

“Sorry, do you need your goddamn hearing checked, you little freak? We're FUCKING each other!” Isaiah yelled louder this time. “Also, I know you're not from here, but like, it's considered rude as hell to stalk people and break into their houses.”

“SERAPH! ANSWER ME!” It shouted, trying to get Isaiah to shut the fuck up. “You are engaging in SEXUAL IMMORALITY with this mortal woman?!”

“I am not currently engaging in any sex with a woman.” Was all it managed to say.

“You are… I am… I don't even know what to say! This is so much worse than I thought!” The Throne said, stumbling over its words in shocked anger. It eyed Aethriel up and down, a little more than Isaiah thought was totally necessary. “Sexual immorality, lust, watching pornography, leaving your post, and even to the end, insubordination… Do you even understand how much paperwork this is going to be? Seraph, your fate is surely death!”

“Hey, wait, wait, hold on, there's paperwork involved in this?” Isaiah said.

“Yes? Of course there is?” Replied the Throne.

“That sounds like it totally sucks. Why don't you stay here with us and just have hot sex?” Isaiah said. “Doesn't seem like you're too thrilled about your job anyway if you're complaining about paperwork. Plus what if you do it wrong, is big Daddy God gonna like, kill you or something?” He teased.

“I will be ignoring that RIDICULOUS excuse for a joke you just made and-”

“Oh no, that isn't a joke. That is a serious proposition.” Isaiah said. The fire inside the Throne blazed a little hotter as he slid his thumbs to his waistband, pulling down his underwear just enough for a little bit of his bush and his NO GODS NO MASTERS tattoo to show.

“That is simply sacrilegious, outrageous, offensive!” It said, but Isaiah was pretty sure he was getting somewhere. He slowly approached the Throne.

“Hmm? Really? Anything else?” He said. “I see you eyeing up my Seraph. Seems like you're doing a little bit of lusting yourself, Ophanim. What's that thing Jesus said that one time? Oh yeah, gouge out your eye if it causes you to stumble, hmm? You got a lot of eyes, that's a LOT of gouging.”

“I was most certainly NOT ‘eyeing up’ your- I mean, the, Seraph!” It protested, tearing its gaze away from the Seraph's soft mouth and perfectly shimmering feathers, and those beautiful eyes- NO! It was not looking!

“Mhm, really? I dunno, I think both of us are gonna give a pretty different testimony when we meet God. He can read those pretty thoughts of yours back, or so I’m told. Maybe you should just stay down here and have some fun. In for a penny in for a pound.” He said.

“I hate to interject, but you were laser focused on my… pussy… for a good thirty seconds with that eye on your inner wheel that you thought I would not notice wandering.” Aethriel said.

“I am NOT a-attracted to Seraphim!” It declared, cursing itself for not being able to hold it together. “I, just because I… just because I gazed upon your form… “ it couldn't help but allow its gaze to wander again. That Seraph does just have a perfect body, how is it supposed to avert its eyes…. ? What it wouldn't do for just a taste… it wondered what Seraph pussy tasted like, and try as it might, it couldn't shake the thought from its mind.

“Oh, drop the high and mighty holier than thou act!” Isaiah said. “Look. You're an angel. You showed up in our kitchen and watched us make out for like five minutes before saying anything. You're practically uncontrollably eye fucking us both right now. You're probably thinking, oh, I wish I could taste these guys’ pussies, oh fuck, please, sit on my face-”

“How did you know what I was thinking- Seraph, did you share your POWERS with this mortal?” It raged.

“I did not. But that is an interesting admission,” Aethriel remarked.

They all stared at each other. Isaiah felt like a goddamn winner. Aethriel was cautiously optimistic. The Throne was more embarrassed than it had ever been in its life. It blazed hot with divine fire and desperately wished it could take all of this back. It thought about how God was not going to look upon it favorably for being so easily tempted into lustful, sexually immoral thoughts. It thought about how long it had been avoiding contact with Seraphim in fear of that damned feeling they gave it when they stopped for a quick word, and how it always had to force away those thoughts about what it would feel like to get bitten by those rows of deliciously sharp teeth. It thought about the mountain of paperwork it was going to have to do, most of which it would have to bullshit because of its piss poor reading and writing skills. Isaiah grabbed his bong off the altar table (an altar table that the Throne hadn't even clocked yet, in its lust and denial and anger,) and gently waved it in its general direction.

“Come onnn, stay a while! Try some weed, it works amazing on slutty little angels, trust me, we'd know.” Aethriel softly giggled at him. An unmistakable flare of fire rocketed around the Throne's wheels. It grumbled to itself in frustration before exclaiming,

“.....Oh, what the FUCK!” It was beyond frustrated. “Fuck this! Give me that!” The Throne said, summoning an astral hand and snatching the bong out of his hands. “You freaks of nature sicken me! You couldn't just let me be a perfectly normal and good Ophanim, you fucking assholes! Now my life is ruined and I'm so fucking horny I want to scream!” It cried. Tears began to prick at the corners of its eyes. “H-how do I use this God forsaken thing?”

“Not so fast, ya piece of shit. Transphobes don't get the bong. First, apologize for calling me a woman.” He said. It looked at him with sad looking eyes.

“I… I apologize for calling you a woman.” It said. “For what it is worth I only did so because God told me to. He said, a ‘rebellious Jezebel may be involved in a Seraph’s disappearance.’ That's all the fucking information I had to go off of. I was only called in to help because the first three angels came up with nothing. He thought maybe I'd- well. I'd rather not tell that story.” It brought the bong up closer to it and rotated its outer wheel into position. From the smooth, greenish-gold surface, a mouth opened up. It looked much less soft than Aethriel’s, and had only one tongue and one row of teeth. It tried to put the entire top opening of the bong into its mouth. When that didn't do anything, it rotated its wheel again and opened up another mouth, trying the same thing again. The tears began to roll down its wheels.

“Okay, y'know what, good enough. Give that to Aethriel and it'll show you.” Aethriel looked at Isaiah in surprise, but gladly took the glass object from its hand and went to the altar to grab some flower out of the grinder.

“Y-you are truly going to share this… bong… with me?” It asked. “Even though I…”

“Misgendered me and threatened Aethriel with death?” Asked Isaiah.

“Yes, that…” it said, cautiously, “Are you not… angry?”

“Not really,” said Aethriel, “I assume you are just here on orders, and when I was in heaven I did feel a bit sorry for the Ophanim. You are always so… surrounded by observation.” It said, packing a bowl. “And those Cherubim do not treat you well at all.”

“And honestly I've had much worse from humans when they think I'm a woman. One time a guy tried to hit me with his car.”

“You… aren't going to hurt me?” It said. Its inner wheel rotated around to its back, trying to hide its missing eye.

“We are not going to hurt you.”

“Yeah, not unless you want us to. This is a threesome, remember?” The Throne pictured the rows of teeth hidden within the Seraph's mouth and tried not to whimper. The way it wanted those teeth to close around its wheels and BITE... it was practically aching for it. Aethriel turned around, holding the bong, and brought it closer to the Throne.

“I think you will find that Isaiah and I will treat you very well. Do not be afraid,” it said, holding the bong up to its mouth and taking a hit. “Holy, holy, holy…” The Throne was speechless for a moment.

“...I cannot believe the way you blaspheme. It is simply… unthinkable.” It said.

“So you do not want any?” Said Athriel, about to hand the bong to Isaiah.

“Give me that-!” It grabbed the glass yet again and mimicked to the best of its ability what it had just seen Aethriel do. The smoke bubbled up and it inhaled hard, too hard, and coughed the smoke out of every mouth on its external ring at once. “Holy… Holy-” it kept coughing, “Holy fuck-!”

“Haha, yeah, that's the idea,” Isaiah said, picking the bong out of the Throne’s hands and taking a hit himself. The Throne could feel its inner workings buzz with a feeling it had never felt before. It spread all around its wheels, then out to its wings, then lit up its core. The sexual excitement it had felt earlier was one thing, but God, this was a different beast. It wondered whether it was actually hornier now, or if the weed was just loosening its inhibitions, and it had been this horny all along. For now, it no longer forced itself to correct its wandering eyes. It drank in the sight of the human’s lithe form and the Seraph’s strong looking wings. They took turns passing the bong around in a circle while they talked.

“Alright… I really do like this.” It said. “And I… I suppose I TRUST you enough to tell you both that I find you… incredibly attractive.”

“Thanks.” Said Isaiah. “We think you're pretty hot too.”

“Y-you do?!” It asked, incredulous.

“Yes, of course! I have had a thing for Ophanim for quite a while, honestly.” Aethriel said, passing the bong to Isaiah. “You have such radiant wheels.”

“...I must confess I do have a… thing… for Seraphim.” It said, “You have such gorgeous wings, it makes me feel so small and… inadequate.” It covered the mouth that was speaking with a hand, eyes wide in embarrassment. “I-I mean, such s-sharp teeth. I mean-!”

“Oh, so Ophanim are HORNY horny. I see.” Isaiah said. “I should have brought a notebook to write all this down. Hey, what’s your name by the way? I’m gonna write it down when I eventually get around to documenting this.” Isaiah asked.

“...Edon.” It admitted, hitting the bong.

“I’m Isaiah.” He said.

“And I am Aethriel. But I believe you already knew that.” It said. Edon couldn’t help but stare at its mouth. “I do appreciate the compliments, and I am more than willing to show you just how sharp my teeth are, if you are interested. Lord knows this one is not, Isaiah is so soft skinned.”

“Hey! Look, just because I’m not personally into getting bitten…”

“Yes, please!” Edon responded almost immediately, and was hit with a wave of horrible shame and embarrassment. “I mean, you… you shouldn’t.”

“Why shouldn’t it?” Isaiah asked.

“BECAUSE!” It argued. “I shouldn’t WANT these things! I shouldn’t be here at all! I shouldn’t be doing any of this!” Aethriel only barely snatched the bong out of the way before Edon attempted to swat it over onto the floor. “Oh, Lord, what am I doing?”

“I felt that way too, at first.” Aethriel comforted the weeping Throne. “But truly, I say to you, Edon, pleasure is a good thing.”

“I…”

“If you don’t want to do this, we aren’t gonna force you, dude.” Isaiah chimed in.

“The problem is,” It began through its tears, “t-the problem is that I DO want it! I want it TERRIBLY! Oh, how I’ve lusted, oh how I’ve sinned…”

“Hey, it’s okay! You’re safe with us.” Isaiah said, trying to softly comfort the creature. He gently reached out and touched its outer wheel, softly caressing the smooth yet unknown metallic (or maybe stone???) feeling surface. It shuddered at his touch, wheels shifting alignment as it settled into this feeling.

“Do be careful of my eyes,” it warned, sounding a bit wary.

“I will. Relax for me, relax for us. We're gonna take good care of you.”

Aethriel moved closer to the Throne and settled in, using a hand to steady its outer wheel, while Isaiah shifted his attention to Edon’s wings. He gently pressed his thumbs into the bases of them, rubbing firm but careful circles into the only part of the Throne that could be considered soft, at least to Isaiah's knowledge. Its eyes rolled back and it kept its mouths closed to stifle a moan, leaning into the touch and doing its best to keep itself upright. The Throne's body was much more malleable than the Seraph's. Its wheels could be manipulated in any direction, and its wings could be moved around to be anywhere surrounding its body. Aethriel marveled at how warm its wheels were, before moving in to give it what it really wanted. 

Edon had never been touched like this before, not by request, anyway. It was VERY touch starved and the gentle treatment was something it hadn’t known it had needed this badly. It was falling, fast. 

“Close your eyes, I am going to kiss you now.” Aethriel instructed, and Edon complied, closing the eyes that were closest to it on its outer wheel. The other eyes stayed wide open, staring at the Seraph as it first reached out a tongue, then another, to kiss and taste the area.

“O-oh,!” It exclaimed, feeling the softness and care with which Aethriel manipulated it. It opened one of its mouths to meet Aethriel’s, intertwining its tongue with the Seraph's several. Its soft lips parted just a little more and allowed Edon to get a light, barely there scrape across the tongue from a few of its teeth. Its outer wheel hit the ground. “Ohfuck, oh fuck, I, oh God, please, Seraph, please bite me!”

“You would like to be bitten?” Aethriel asked, teasingly.

“Yes , please -!” It begged. Aethriel didn't want to keep it waiting further, opting to open its mouth and bite down on its outer wheel, making sure to dig its teeth in enough to hurt but not leave marks. It made a pathetic and desperate sound, crying out in pain and arousal.

“Edon, do you have a penis?” Isaiah asked, playfully reaching between its wheels to touch and toy with its divine fire within. It squirmed and moaned sluttily, unable to answer when he was touching it like that. “Or a vagina, or cloaca, or all three, or something totally different?”

“We are… doing things like that…? Like actual, sexual intercourse?” It asked, bewildered.

“Are you down for it?” Asked Isaiah. “My pussy is pretty soft and warm, and I have an IUD now, you can just cum right inside me.” He offered. Aethriel let go with its teeth, causing the Throne to whine and try to present more of its wheel surface to be bitten again, the inner one this time.

“And I am also more than excited to share my body with you.” The Seraph offered, “I would be honored for you to know me.”

“H-holy shit,” it stammered. “I… uhm… I have a phallus, yes… cumming… IN you… that sounds… ohhh… that sounds fucking incredible…” It had been told that its phallus existed as a testament to the purity of the Ophanim; meant to remain untouched and unused. But the idea of filling… anything, honestly, with cum sounded great right now. Even if it wasn't sure if that was really possible, even if it was nervous that it would be like last time.

“Have you ever cum before?”

“... Yeah.” It admitted. “Uhm, it didn't… feel very good.” It explained. “But I assume it was because the circumstances were less than ideal.”

“...What do you mean by that???” Aethriel asked.

“It was humiliating.” It clarified. “It just kind of. Happened. I was not trying to cum, I did not want it to happen. I did not know that I had the ability, even. It was a long time ago, at a celebration of a holiday of all places. A Seraph got up close to me and there were so many other angels around, I couldn't get away. I guess it thought nobody would be paying attention, it asked to… ‘dance’ with me. Our bodies were touching, and then… well. Angels saw. God took out one of my eyes.” It said, as if this was easy to understand. “But even if I hadn't been punished, cumming didn't feel good. It felt …incomplete, and a little bit painful, I was so afraid, I felt disgusting and sick, and of course horrifically embarrassed. I do not know if I can cum in a way that is pleasurable.”

“I think you just came in your non-existent pants, my dude.” Isaiah explained, not expecting this and also not really understanding that Edon was telling him that it had been sexually assaulted in the past. Isaiah was under the impression that this was something along the lines of like, cumming in your pants after kissing your crush, or something. Miscommunication had occurred here. He'd really only asked because he was going to base his risk assessment of how dangerous it would be to fuck this thing based on a follow up question. “It sounds like that was really traumatic for you, for something you didn't really understand to happen to your body in a very public setting and then be physically injured and abused because of it.”

“I-It is not abuse!”

“It was abuse.” Aethriel reiterated Isaiah’s message. “No loving God would treat His angels that way.” Edon bristled, cringing at the blasphemy and wanting to say something to argue, but the words in its mind were lost as soon as Aethriel began to kiss it softly again.

“If you wouldn't like to cum or have your penis touched, that is also completely up to you.” Isaiah offered. “If you don’t want to be touched, we won’t touch you.”

“...But…? What about…?” It trailed off.

“What about what?”

“Y-you both offered…” It couldn't bring itself to give any more details of what was offered. All it could think about was sharp, unforgiving teeth, and soft, warm pussy. It hadn't really experienced pussy firsthand before, but from the way humans talk about it it figured it must be pretty damn good. “I was looking forward to it…”

“Angelcake, this is YOUR threesome. Today is for you,” Isaiah said. “What do YOU want?”

What did it want? Oh, it would have been easier to ask what it didn't want. Head spinning, Edon broke down in tears, softly sobbing while the two beings tried to comfort it.

“I-I, I w-want you to bite me until you l-leave dents in my wheels. I want you to k-keep kissing me… I want to taste you both, I want to feel how soft you are…” It confessed. “I am a pervert and a sinner!”

“Yeah, but those are like, the two best things to be!” Isaiah said, intending to be comforting. “Look, we can definitely make all that happen, but I have a slight question.”

“That is…?”

“Is it like. Burning, boiling fucking hot when you cum? Because I'm not gonna lie I am not risking third degree burns in my pussy for angel dick. I'm sorry.”

“N-no, I don't think so…” it said.

“Alright, good. Now uh, follow up question. Where is your dick?”

“It-”

“Actually don't tell me. I wanna figure it out.” Isaiah said, abandoning his task of giving a wing massage to instead begin examining the Throne.

Aethriel continued making out with Edon, swirling its tongues around Edon’s and giving it the occasional too-gentle bite. The Seraph caressed its wheels with its astral hands, summoning four of them and using them to break the poor creature down. It used two to rub soft patterns into the metallic surface, one on the outer wheel, one on the inner wheel. With the other two hands, it toyed with some of its other mouths, sticking its fingers into them and encouraging them to open just a bit wider than was comfortable. The throne did not have a very strong gag reflex, but it was definitely something it had to fight, a feeling that left pinpricks of tears in the corners of its many eyes. It felt like it was being touched everywhere except where it needed it, so gently, TOO gently. It had half a mind to beg for rougher treatment.

“You are doing so well, allowing me access like this, surrendering to me,” Aethriel praised, “But I would like you to surrender just a bit further. Yield to me, Edon.” It commanded, pushing two fingers into one of its throats. The passageway was not large and it could very barely accommodate what the Seraph was giving it. It moaned softly around its fingers and tried to relax, reminding itself not to bite, trying to cradle the digits with its tongue. “There you go. So submissive. So good…” It wanted to do good. It wanted to do what Aethriel was telling it to do. It wanted to yield. After what felt like forever, the Seraph took its fingers back, admiring the glistening string of saliva that connected its tongue and its hand. “Very good. Do you think you could take one of my tongues?” The Throne made a high, needy whining sound. “If you can take it all, I will bite you as hard as you want.”

“I-I do not care if I CAN,” It replied, “Please do it anyway. You don't have to be gentle...”

Isaiah was pretty sure that its dick was not connected directly to the wheels themselves, because his thorough examination of the undersides of both wheels (sliding his hands all over them looking for an opening or any indication of more than a flat surface, much to the excitement of the otherwise preoccupied Throne,) revealed pretty much nothing except for incomprehensible arcane script in a dead language or something, that lit up with a soft green light when he traced his fingers over it. Cool, but not what he was looking for.

Aethriel kissed one of the Throne's mouths again, less gently this time, and started to push one of its tongues into its mouth, then throat. Edon choked, squeezing its closest eyes shut. It forced itself to relax and let Aethriel have its way. It wanted more. Aethriel was going to give it more. All it had to do was obey. It pushed a little further, deeper, slowly fitting the whole thing down while the Throne struggled to keep from fighting it. After a few moments, Aethriel pulled back just a small amount. The Throne cracked its eye open again, expecting the Seraph to pull its tongue out completely, but instead it just added the other two.

Isaiah began toying with the center of the Throne. The being reacted delightfully with a soft and needy sound as he began carding through the divine flames like they were hair or maybe grass. They felt hot to the touch, but not hot enough to cause any actual damage to his skin. Edon spun its inner wheel around to give Isaiah more access, moaning softly and begging a quiet “Please!!” He could feel something soft and slippery wrap around his hand and gently squeeze, seeking out stimulation. Oh. OH. So this was what it meant by phallus.

He put his other hand in there too, mapping out the phallus and wondering how he was going to get it out into the open. The angel was very obviously rock hard, but he felt like its dick was sort of… tethered down, to the rest of its currently obscured by flame genitals, almost akin to a t-dick, but… not really. Edon was a Throne, and all Throne genitalia kind of looks like an acid trip. 

He didn’t have to wonder about how to get it to come out of the divine flame for long though, as it seemed as if just putting his hands on it briefly was enough to shatter the Throne’s control of itself. It had been trying not to pop an obvious boner for the past forty five minutes, something it had gotten quite good at over the years, but the physical touch of the organ itself was too much. The divine fire in its center flared again, and Isaiah watched as the phallus was revealed, writhing in the cool air of his living room. It was smooth and glistening with that same honey-flavored cum stuff that the other angel produced, rivulets slowly dripping from the sort of triangular slit which seemed to be positioned at the very bottom edge of the tip, kind of being positioned partially on the underside of the shaft rather than in the center.  The tip of it kind of flared out to create a semi-blunt area surrounded by three soft outcroppings, kind of forming a shallow divot. Isaiah was sure this couldn’t possibly be the reason why, but the thought did cross his mind that the divot looked awfully a lot like it would fit a cervix. The rest of the phallus didn’t have much texture to it except for a few ridges under the head, and it was flexible and seemingly prehensile although it was angled quite a bit downwards due to the ligaments that sort of tethered it a bit down to whatever structure was still hidden in the flame. It wasn’t really that big, when compared to the size of the angel. He’d expected it to be a decent amount bigger. 

It also had a thin scar around the top of the shaft, indicating that at one point, it had probably had a foreskin, which had since been removed.

“Wow,” Isaiah said. He reached out and grasped it in his hands, sliding them up and down the length of it slowly and gently to get Edon used to the feeling. It pressed itself into his hands, thrusting between them as much as it was able to with Aethriel fucking with it on the other side. God, that felt amazing.

The Throne wanted to say something, to gently remind Isaiah of the pussy it was promised, to beg him to let it have just a taste, but it was far too distracted by the tongue down its throat. Aethriel was greatly enjoying how compliant the sweet Throne was being as it depth tested the poor thing. It knew it wasn’t going to be able to entirely shut Edon up, Edon had far too many mouths and the Seraphim unfortunately have a hard limit of 7 astral hands summoned at once. This was an ability Aethriel was using now, wordlessly instructing the Throne to take its fingers in as many throats as the Seraph could get to.

Mercifully, finally, when it really wasn’t sure if it could take any more, Aethriel took its tongues out of the first mouth on the Throne it had begun fucking with.

“There you go. You did wonderfully,” It praised, “Very compliant, you yielded so well!”

“Y-yes, Seraph,” It replied, “Anything…”

“Now, I will keep my promise to you. I told you I would bite as hard as you wanted, remember?” It traced gently around one of Edon’s eyes, wiping away a tear.

“Yes! God, please, bite me, bite hard. Please. As hard as you can. I-I really do want you to try and dent my surface, I do not care, please!” It begged. Aethriel wasn’t totally sure it knew what it was asking for, as it was pretty sure that it could take a chunk of wheel out of the Throne if it really wanted to.

“Edon, darling,” It said, “It seems that you think that would be difficult for me.”

“I-It wouldn’t?

“I could rip you apart with these teeth. I could tear a little Throne like you wheel from wheel.” Isaiah felt its dick twitch in his hands.

“If I knew that was an option,” It said, having to pause to catch its breath, “I would have picked fights with Seraphim centuries ago.” Aethriel laughed at that statement, certain the Throne was joking. “No, really! Pull my w-wheels out of alignment. Untrue me!”

“...I will not untrue you.” It said. “That would hurt you terribly. It is out of the question, off the table.” Isaiah really wasn't sure what untruing entailed, but it seems like it was some kind of incredible gore thing for a creature made from wheels, as he was pretty sure that ‘truing’ a wheel means to make it circular. He took his pants and underwear off while the two angels were negotiating, smirking devilishly at how wide Edon’s eyes went and how intently they stared at his pussy.

“...How about denting my surface?” It pleaded.

“Hm…” The Throne's heart dropped, fearing the Seraph wouldn't be keeping its promise. “...I think I can make that happen for you.”

“Yes!!! Please!!!” Edon begged, relieved. Isaiah was aware the Throne was experiencing a lot right now, but he was feeling mean. And even though he hadn't really said anything about it, he felt like Edon should have understood that his pussy was at mouth level, therefore it should be eating it. That just won't do.

He took his hands off its dick at the same time Aethriel bit down. Hard. It was surprised at how easy it was to make the poor Throne absolutely SCREAM, in ecstasy and pain and frustration all at once. Aethriel’s teeth dug deep into the material of Edon’s outer wheel, and silvery white manna pooled in the bite marks like blood, beading from the punctures. The Seraph wasn't expecting it to be that easy to break the surface. It had meant to go a bit shallower, but… hey. Edon was enjoying it, if the way its phallus was dripping precum and throbbing pitifully and untouched in the air was anything to go by.

“P-PLEASE!!! Oh, GOD!” It managed to articulate, “PLEASE don't stop!!!” Aethriel and Isaiah looked at each other, unsure of which being was being spoken to, or if it was both of them. Isaiah was the only one with a mouth free, so he decided it was for him and responded.

“Hey, pleasure is a two way street, ya fucking pillow princess.” He said, gently running a finger over the slit at the tip of its cock. “If you aren't eating me out, I'm not jerking you off.”

“N-no, please!” It begged, “Please keep touching me, please let me taste you, I want to taste you, I didn't know!!!”

“Maybe you should have known.” He said.

“I'm sorry!” It pleaded, opening up the mouth closest to his pussy, inviting him to get closer. Aethriel was thoroughly enjoying itself. Slick dripped to the floor from its cloaca. Wow. Biting was fun. It released the throne from its jaws and picked another spot, biting down again. “AaaH!” Isaiah stood a little closer, lining his pussy up with its open mouth.

“Get to work.” He said, and it eagerly extended a tongue, probing between his folds. Oh, Lord, he is soft , it thought. Oh, Lord, he offered to let me cum in this? Will I even survive that?! It delved into him with as much brain power as it could devote to such a task while getting bitten hard enough to see stars. This was truly Edon’s heaven. Once Isaiah perceived that Edon was doing a good enough job, he finally graced it with his mouth around the tip of its cock. It instantly reacted with a shocked and greatly pleased moan.

It tasted very similar to Aethriel, just maybe with a hint of something savory along with the sweetness of the honey flavor. He explored the Throne’s tip with his tongue, pressing into the slit and tracing around the flared head teasingly. It twitched and flexed in his hands and on his tongue, like it had a mind of its own.

Aethriel gave it a few more absolutely heavenly dents in its pretty, MOSTLY otherwise unmarred outer wheel before it began to become impatient. It let go of Edon, eyeing a very shaky legged and pleased Isaiah with envy. Edon’s tongue probably felt really good…

“Why does he get to have all the fun?” It asked, in that cute pouty voice. “Edon, if you want me to keep biting you, you will have to up the ante.”

“W-what do you want? I’ll do anything!” It replied, lost in pleasure and greatly desiring Aethriel’s teeth back in its wheels.

“I want you to know me.” Aethriel requested, locking eyes with Isaiah. Fine, if that was how it wanted to play….

“Hey, go ahead. But Edon, you better not finish inside Aethriel. I think you promised all that cum to me already.” He countered.

“...I can try.. Not to..?” Edon suggested, very much not sure if it would be able to keep that promise. It was pretty sure the second it slid inside soft warm Seraph pussy and felt Aethriel dig its heavenly teeth into it, and felt manna drip down its wheel from the bite marks, that it was going to cum, instantly, and absolutely paint Aethriel’s insides. “U-um… but… I do not know if I will be able to, ah, c-control myself…”

“You won’t have a choice,” Said Isaiah, stepping out of range of Edon’s mouth to dig around in his work backpack again. He produced a cockring, a leather one that could be adjusted for dick size. “With the understanding that you produce some kind of fluid when you cum, this is gonna prevent that.”

“W-will it hurt?”

“Not in a literal sense.” Isaiah responded. “Be good for me, Edon.” He fastened the cock ring as far back on Edon’s cock as he could reach, and tightened it until it made a soft sound of discomfort. The base of its dick seemed to be semi- attached to a membrane behind two closed, fleshlike coverings, which looked a little like labia, but Isaiah wasn’t really paying attention to that right now especially considering they were mostly concealed in flame. He did his best not to catch the membrane underneath the cockring so that it wouldn’t pinch and hurt. 

“Why do you have these things in your satchel that you bring to work?” Aethriel asked.

“Listen, you don’t even wanna KNOW how many of my coworkers I’ve fucked.” He responded, pushing the base of Edon’s phallus to rotate it around to face Aethriel. “Go wild. It can’t cum even if it wanted to.”

Aethriel positioned itself on its back, propped up against the couch, so that Edon would have full access to its cloaca and it would still be able to bite the shit out of its wheels at the same time. Edon gazed upon the body of the Seraph with such lust it could scarcely even remember what it had come here for in the first place. God . Its body was truly perfect. Those feathers were to die for. The lines of its body were so strong, its eyes so bright, its wings so powerful. Edon caught itself before it began to literally drool over Aethriel’s pussy; it was so puffy and pink and CLEARLY aroused, absolutely dripping with slick, and all just for Edon…? I mean, Isaiah too, it guessed. But still!

“Y-your pussy is fucking DIVINE.” It said, dick twitching as it loomed over Aethriel’s entrance. “Oh, Lord, I need you.”

“Go ahead,” Aethriel said, and that was all it really needed to say. Edon pushed into Aethriel’s pussy with no hesitation once it had the go ahead, and it was not gentle. It was a virgin, after all, and didn’t really know what it was doing. It popped its head into it and began to press inside as quickly as it could. “S-slowly, please! That does not feel nice!”

“Sorry, sorry!!” It apologized, slowing its speed as it sunk further into the velvety softness. Fuck . That was. This was. This was a lot. It approached the edge almost immediately, as soon as it bottomed out and got a good ten thrusts in. “F-fuck!! I-I’m sorry, I'm so so sorry I'm going to-!” It attempted to continue, to fight its way over the edge, but whatever magic was in that leather strap Isaiah had placed around it held strong. It just. Couldn’t. It felt like it hit a wall, a frustratingly placed wall, bordering on painful. “W-what…?”

“Haha, looks like it’s working beautifully!” Isaiah commented, getting close to the edge himself on Edon’s tongue. “Don’t stop, ah, fuck-”

“It is not fair!” Edon cried, trying to fuck Aethriel harder in an attempt to get relief. Aethriel had forgotten about its promise to bite. This was definitely not GOOD sex, it was definitely amatuer as fuck, but the raw, needy roughness of it all was doing it for the Seraph. “I-I… I need to…”

“To cum?” Aethriel finished Edon’s sentence, “Oh, we know, Edon. You will just have to make me cum first. Then I believe Isaiah would be more than happy to relieve you.”

“I-I…!” The poor Throne didn’t know what to do. So it again tried to obey. Trying to bring Aethriel to orgasm was already difficult for the little virgin, and it was made even more complex by Aethriel finally remembering to pull itself up and start biting again, and Isaiah’s ever present insistence on getting his pussy attended to. Any time it stopped even for a second, either one of the two beings tormenting it would tease and taunt and make everything take even longer. By the time Aethriel came, the Throne was so far into some hellish mixture of overstimulation and desperation for more, that the Seraph’s pussy squeezing around it as it came didn’t even feel good. It just felt sore. It cried, tears mixing with manna as they rolled down its wheels.

“Fuck… Edon, you did so well… we really must do that again sometime!” Aethriel said, relaxing against the couch and surveying its damage to the Throne’s wheels. It had a good six to eight bite marks, the newest of which still dripped with manna. They were not deep enough to seriously hurt, and Aethriel suspected all but the very deepest of them would heal nicely, becoming invisible in a short time. But for now it looked an absolute mess, shivering in the soft light, full of those bite marks it desperately desired.

“T-thank…you…” It managed to say, wincing as it withdrew from Aethriel’s pussy.

“Are you up for round two, angel cake?” Isaiah asked, removing himself from Edon’s tongue to reach and undo the leather cockring. Edon cried out softly as he removed it, relieved to have that thing off of it.

“I t-think I need a short break. I am s-sorry.” It replied, “But please, I need to cum. Tonight. Please.” It really sounded desperate.

“We understand,” Aethriel said. “How about we go to Isaiah’s bed? We may all fit.”

“And I could add more space, let’s grab some couch cushions and put them next to the mattress.” Isaiah suggested. They did so, kindly leading a very shaky, exhausted, tearful Edon to Isaiah’s bed and making sure it was settled in before the other two beings got in. Edon folded up its wheels so that they were flat, lying out on the bed contentedly. It realized just how fucking tired it was, yet its dick still throbbed. It made a soft sound of annoyance and need, looking pleadingly at Isaiah.

“Human…” It started. Aethriel giggled softly as it began to preen its feathers.

“Yeah?”

“I-I need you to help me.” It pleaded softly. “Please…”

“With what?” He asked, determined to continue the tease as long as he could.

“Please. Your pussy. You promised.”

“Oh? But it’s right here!” He said, standing up. He stepped over the now flattened divine flame in the center of the throne, positioning his pussy directly over the Throne’s dick without touching it yet.

“P-pl…” It really wasn’t able to speak clearly through the tears. It was tired. It needed to cum.

“Alright, ya big baby. Just sit back, relax, and let a real pro ride this thing.”

“And can I…?”

“Can you…?”

“Can I CUM in you??? PLEASE.” It forced itself to complete the sentence, even with the humiliation of hearing the Seraph’s giggling in reply.

“Oh, you wanna paint my fucking womb, hmm?” He asked, gently, softly pressing the head of Edon’s cock against his pussy. It felt so soft, almost like a kiss, yet that stimulation alone was already overwhelming. “I wonder how MUCH it's gonna be. Aethriel doesn't have a dick and it's a fuckin’ squirter, so I can only imagine what you've got for me.”

“....” Edon looked away in embarrassment, refusing the question as it thought about how messy and embarrassing it had been last time. It was a little embarrassed at how much it knew it was going to cum, and selfishly it was a bit afraid Isaiah wasn't going to want to deal with all that. Isaiah’s body slowly, softly accepted the head of Edon’s cock. He was really trying to make it nice for the poor Throne who was very fucked out, very needy and honestly just needed a warm pussy to cum in, food, and a warm nap cuddled up with someone. In all honesty that was all it had needed for a very very very long time, way before Isaiah was ever born. Edon made a soft little sound as Isaiah took more of it, bottoming out at around the 6 inches mark which was all Isaiah could take. It had at least a few more, but that was just not happening. Aethriel had been able to take all of it. But Aethriel didn't have a fucking uterus in the way, Isaiah assumed it had an oviduct which is just more tube. Despite how big it was lengthwise, it actually wasn't terrible girth wise, and Isaiah was pleasantly surprised by the feeling. He started slowly, gently moving his hips up and down, allowing Edon time to adjust to how tight he was. Isaiah wouldn’t know this, and honestly neither would Aethriel, but, Edon was actually pretty small, in the phallus department, for a Throne.

Edon could scarcely comprehend how well the tip of its cock fit around Isaiah's cervix. It knew for a fact it was not gonna last long even before Isaiah started riding it, but feeling the entrance to his womb just FIT together with its dick on every thrust was a little much. It was making Edon fucking dizzy, making it want to grab his hips and hold him down on it, it wanted their parts to kiss like that again and again. It knew intellectually the last thing it wanted right now was to cause another Nephilim situation, but the more base part of its brain was imagining this human getting very pregnant. It wasn't sure why this desire was happening right NOW of all times, but…

“Are you okay???” Isaiah asked, stopping his movements when he noticed that Edon had its eyes closed tightly shut.

“DO NOT stop!” It demanded, “I, I-I need you, I need to f-fill your womb with cum so FUCKING badly. God, you have no IDEA.” It admitted. “Isaiah, please!!!”

“Mhm?” He kept his hips moving slowly and softly, assuming Edon still needed the gentleness, sharing a knowing glance at Aethriel who was watching intently. “I know, angel cake. You really think I'm gonna let you get out of this any other way? I'm not letting you get up until your balls are EMPTY.” he teased.

Edon was at the end of its rope. It couldn't handle the slow movement anymore. It needed to breed him. It grabbed his hips and guided/forced them down its shaft, once, twice, a third time, not that Isaiah was resisting or anything. It felt the part of Isaiah's pussy just about an inch past his entrance get way tighter around it as it moved him like a toy, and, acting on pure instinct, it pushed in just a bit deeper. Then the dam broke. As soon as its knot swelled up all the way and caught behind his pubic bone, the first spurt of cum sprayed against his soft, inviting walls, and Edon wailed in pleasure as its orgasm broke.

“Are you fucking-” Isaiah gasped, feeling its knot tie inside of him, sealing his fate. “Are you fucking KNOTTING me?!”

“I-I… don't know…!! I don't know what's happening, I'm sorry!!” Edon cried. The flared tip of its dick was situated right up against his cervix, lined up perfectly, urethra to cervical os, pressed there and held there by its (small, for a Throne) knot. A more experienced Throne would have been able to tell this was a particularly good tie; absolutely none of the 150+mL of cum it was giving Isaiah was going to waste, and it was practically shooting directly into his uterus. There was scarcely anywhere else for it to even go. Pulse after pulse of thick, hot cum shot from its tip and flooded the human’s womb. The poor Throne was shaking and slurring soft apologies as it fell quickly into being entirely overwhelmed by just how fucking GOOD this felt to do, how natural it felt to fill him up. It was so relieved, so fucking turned on, so fucking embarrassed. Its divine fire flared around its wheels, and it desperately grabbed at Isaiah's hips as some kind of an anchor point as it came. Its cock twitched with every strong pulse of cum it poured into the little human. The tie held firm, knot doing its job extremely well. Nothing was leaking out. Edon was never getting back into heaven now.

“Fuck- oh, shit, you're really -” Isaiah exclaimed, trying to make himself relax and just take the huge quantity of ejaculate being pumped into him. It was a very fulfilling feeling, it felt very good, even though there was a bit of cramping happening. He could feel every individual cumshot stretch his anatomy. Part of him worried that there was no fucking way a flimsy ass copper ion iud was going to stand up against this. Part of him was extremely turned on by the soft swell in his abdomen that was being caused by the large volume of angel cum safely in his pussy and womb and the wonderfully placed knot keeping it all in there. “You weren't fucking around when you said you were gonna fill my womb, buddy!”

“I-I can't make it stop!” It said, softly, embarrassed and oh so anxious that Isaiah was going to be so, so angry. “I did not know this would happen…!” Tears streamed down its wheels as it continued to pump him full.

“Hey, it's okay!” Isaiah said, softly, trying to comfort it. “Just relax and let it happen, okay? This is where you're supposed to be. You're doing such a good job.” he praised. “Fuck, you're still cumming…?”

“I… I am …” It admitted. “I TOLD you it was humiliating!”

“I cannot help but be… a bit jealous.” Aethriel mentioned, blatantly touching itself to the sight.

“Of which one of us?” Isaiah asked.

“Both of you,” Aethriel giggled. “Ah, but I assume there will be a next time.”

“Oh there will be. Next time, you get knotted. This shit rules.”

“A-aren’t you going to ask me?” Edon piped up. It was definitely still cumming but the sensation was dying down. Instead of constant overwhelming pleasure, it came in softer waves with each rope of cum, which were getting a little less voluminous with each subsequent pulse.

“Oh, I'm sorry, are you going to turn down the opportunity to knot a Seraph?” Isaiah asked.

“A Seraph that ranks much higher than you?” Aethriel added on. “A Seraph that could untrue you?”

“...point taken.” It managed to say. Its dick twitched softly as it finally finished ejaculating, now just dry twitching in his cunt. “....fuck. I am so sorry about this. I had no idea…”

“You really have nothing to be sorry about.” Isaiah said. “That was hot. Incredibly hot. God has GOTTA stop sending me these sexy ass angels. The fuck does He think is gonna happen?” Isaiah tried to stand up, but all that did was cause pain to both him and the Throne. Evidently this whole knot situation was not going to be resolved quickly.

“Oww…”

“Fuck, I'm sorry. Can you like, move a little so I can lay down?” Isaiah asked.

“I can try.” Edon replied. They all shuffled positions, eventually settling on Aethriel leaning against the Throne in a way that allowed Isaiah to rest on top of it, lying on his back while they all waited for Edon’s knot to go down.

It took like 30 minutes. An entire half hour for the knot to finally go down enough for Isaiah to pull it out. This was complicated by the fact that fifteen minutes in, Isaiah shifted wrong and got Edon all excited again when he was explaining how his IUD worked.

“It basically makes my uterus a shitty place for sperm.” He'd explained. “But I mean, I'm not gonna lie I have no idea if this thing is rated for divine intervention.”

“So that means I…” Edon trailed off. Isaiah squeezed around it softly just to tease, shifting his hips.

“That you could have just knocked me up?” He said, which was the wrong thing to say, as Edon came another few pulses into his already full womb, and the knot went all the way back up. Edon’s biology just REALLY wanted him pregnant, Isaiah joked.

After another fifteen minutes Isaiah was able to pull Edon out of him with a wet pop, a rush of translucent, silvery cum pouring from his sore pussy and all over his goddamn sheets. Everyone was far too tired to do anything about it now, and the three beings slept together in a pile on Isaiah’s bed.

Chapter Text

The little angel sat still and upright in his chair, in the small waiting area outside this high ranking Cherub’s office. He was a slight thing, robed in pristine white linen, halo glinting in the divine light that permeated the Archives. He stared straight ahead, anxiety soaring as the minutes ticked by. What if he was in trouble? What if he was about to be demoted, or worse, thrown from heaven? He couldn't think of anything he had done that would warrant that, but still he feared.
After a while, the door to the office opened, and an eagle’s head peered around the doorway.

“Come in.” It said, and the Virtue jumped to his feet, almost dropping the two dead doves he had brought along as a sacrifice just in case.
He sat down across the desk from the Cherub, feeling very small in comparison to the massive creature who must have been three times his size.

“Yes, I am here as requested, your grace.” He started. “And I have brought these two doves as a burnt offering to our Lord.”

“That is unnecessary for today's visit.” The Cherub said, this time with its human face. It picked up the doves and ate them, placing one in its lion mouth and the other in its beak. Its wings were neatly folded obscuring its torso, but the Virtue could see that its ox like legs were crossed casually as it leaned back. The fingers of its hands touched together as if it were contemplating. “Can you tell me what virtue you represent and bring to the people?”  Arseni’s four faces smiled down professionally at the Virtue as he collected himself. It was quite the angel up close, he had to admit. He vaguely wondered what had happened to the hair on its human head; as of right now its red hair was closely cropped, almost shaved completely bald, but the Virtue remembered that when he had briefly interacted with it back in Academy, it had very nice long hair. It was broad shouldered, and it seemed quite a bit smaller in height than the other Cherubim the Virtue had interacted with. Maybe it cuts its hair that way to assert its… masculinity, because of its small stature and lack of official gender designation..? There is no way that THE Arseni, Professor Arseni, would have been forced to cut its hair under order, what crime could IT have committed? But I thought it used to be so proud of the way it kept it… it had such beautiful long hair…

“Chastity, your grace.” He said. “Oh, but I have also been spending hours in the Archives as of late, studying to potentially pursue some generalized Temperance work, or maybe some Purity as well…?”

“Yes, I noticed. That is why you specifically are here today.” The Virtue's heart dropped. Oh, no. He should have stuck to his thing! He never would have opened those books if he thought that the Cherubim were going to be upset with him wanting another degree. “Can you tell me a bit about what you've learned about Temperance, especially as it relates to Chastity?”

“Um… well, it's all very involved and complicated, but to start, Temperance must be constant, as must Chastity. It simply does not count unless you are consistent, one cannot be inconsistently chaste, and one cannot for example, binge drink occasionally and consider themselves sober. Total abstinence within the confines of God's law is the only true way.” The Cherub looked intrigued with all but one of its four faces, so the Virtue continued, “Pardon my language, but sexual intercourse is only acceptable in the confines of Godly marriage for the purpose of creating a child. Alcohol consumption is only appropriate when God’s glory requires it. Anger should only be directed at the enemies of God. Feasting is only acceptable on the Lord's holy days. All else is a completely unacceptable sin.” There was a long pause. The Cherub's human set of eyebrows went slightly up, and it wrote something down on an obnoxiously bright gold clipboard that the Virtue could not read.

“Tell me, Virtue,” the Cherub continued, “and I give you my word that you would never be punished for telling me the truth… especially not in this situation… Have you ever been… inconsistent?” The virtue sat bolt upright, wanting desperately to outright deny the allegation that he had ever wavered in his faith and duty. Echoing in his head was the Cherub's gorgeously dominant, effortlessly in control, musically deep voice. Inconsistent. Heat bloomed across the Virtue's cheeks, blushing down to his fucking chest. No. Not now. This can't be happening now. “I trust you're aware of the situation in heaven and on Earth. The whole unauthorized inter-choir hybrid situation getting out of control, same-choir unauthorized mating, even fornication between angels. There's always been issues with angel-human matings of course as well. Have you ever engaged in those actions, or had those indecent thoughts?” The heat began to spread lower, and the Virtue was forced to pause before responding, at a loss for words despite how desperately it wanted to answer in the negative.

“N-never!” He finally answered, forcing himself to speak and thinking of the praise songs he'd learned in the Academy. “My deepest apologies for the pause, your grace, I simply was just… shocked, I suppose, at the implication! I hope you understand, sexual intercourse, the thought of such actions outside of God’s law, it quite disgusts me.” The angel began to realize how bad of a situation he was in right now. One mistake and he would be dashed to pieces. If the angel across the desk noticed he was hard he would be ridiculed the entire time, too, while his wings were pulled off. The Cherub narrowed its feline eyes at him. “I am well aware of the situation, I sit on a review council for unchaste behavior! I have never even been approached by another angel or God forbid, a human, for any immoral purposes!” At the very least that part was true. Unbeknownst to him, most sexually active angels know to steer clear of hitting on the morality police.

“Yes, I am well aware of your position on the council. It's wonderful, really.” It responded, not sounding as if it were in wonder. It actually seemed disapproving in a way, and the Virtue hoped that his council didn't have any kind of corrupt reputation he didn't know about. “Quite impressive, considering you’re only fifty years out of Academy. Did you hear that case involving that high ranking Cherub, I believe his name was Gathon?”

“...I did, in fact. It was truly terrible.” The Virtue said, “I trust you know he was convicted and destroyed along with most of his offspring. He alone must have been responsible for forty percent of the unauthorized Virtue-Cherub hybrids running around, and likely more like 50% of the fornication.”

“Would you say there are a lot of Virtue-Cherub fornication incidents?” Said the Cherub, inquisitively. It leaned over the desk, almost bridging the gap between the two of them. The Virtue swallowed the drool in its mouth.

“I-I would not say a LOT, there have just been a few high profile cases coming out… in terms of fornication we are currently seeing a lot more problematic Ophanim, especially the oviparous subvariety… sometimes I wonder why God made us with these reproductive parts. They just cause issues!” He said, before covering his mouth. “Oh, oh no. I did not mean it like that. I would never question God's perfect design. There is obviously such an important divine reason for these things that a lowly Virtue such as myself could not comprehend it!” The Cherub leaned back in its chair again, giving the little angel some breathing room.

“I suppose this is as good a time as any to tell you that you aren't in any trouble.” It finally said.

+++

The Cherub watched in amusement as the Virtue scrambled to leave its office after being told of his mission from God. He made a beeline down the hall, muttering some nerd shit about research. He moved so fast that he tripped over the hem of his robes, falling face first into the marble of the Archives, dropping the numerous papers the Cherub had given him, which went everywhere. The Cherub wasn't really paying attention to the Virtue's pain, though. It was a lot more focused on his ass, which was briefly exposed during the fall and was now much more lightly clothed with just the underlayers of his robe as the angel gathered up papers on his hands and knees.

Lord Almighty, it thought, forcing itself to close the door before that Power sitting at the table over there noticed it staring. I was really hoping he wasn't such a fucking square. So pure, and such a cute little virgin. His ass must be tight as Hell. I'd have loved to bend him over my desk and just WRECK him. He probably takes it so well. God, what the others would think if I got to tell them I fornicated with that one twink ass blue haired Virtue on the sexual immorality council… Raphael would be so fucking jealous. I’d love to see the LOOK on his stupid face… It arranged some papers on its desk, then stood up to pace the office.

Checking the time, it could see it had about an hour before it had to speak with the next Virtue on its list, a middle of its class recent Virtue Academy graduate that specialized in human relations and… Diligence? Why the fuck God decided to put that one across its desk, it truly did not know. Diligence wouldn’t get any of these pussy ass Virtues very far on this mission, this is a rural gay bar, not a monastery. Besides, on the topic of sexual immorality, these Virtue Academy new grads were honestly its biggest weakness. Speaking realistically it had probably came inside at least ten percent of the new graduates that it had interviewed for this mission alone.

It collapsed dramatically in its desk chair, spinning around for a moment and considering the pros and cons of this particular Virtue being best suited for the job and not nearly as easy to corrupt. You win some, you lose some, It thought. At least I can stop focusing on finding a single Virtue that ISN’T hopelessly horny for bigger, stronger angels and keep the rest of these interviews to pleasure-only.

Chapter Text

Isaiah awoke to the smell of something cooking and Edon coming into consciousness next to him.

“Ohhh…” it softly moaned, wiping a hand over its wheel, “what the fuck did I do last night…”

“You don't remember?” Isaiah asked. He didn't think the Throne had gotten that high.

“No, I very much do… I am simply shocked that I did all of that.” It explained, covering as many of its eyes as it could. “Shit. Shit, I can't go back to heaven now. Fuck… I am stuck here. My life is over!”

“Or maybe it's just beginning?” Isaiah offered. “I've thought honestly about fighting God. I mean, not right away, but like. You said three more angels tried and failed to come and kill me and Aethriel before you were sent here. The competition doesn't seem crazy, you guys are extremely easy to seduce and turn, and I have a good feeling about asking Dionysus and / or Lucifer for a favor if times get tough.”

“Are you out of your fucking mind?!” Edon asked. “We cannot fight God! I trust you're aware of what happened last time?!”

“Yeah, yeah, but like, we don't need to like physically fight unless it comes to that. I'm talking more like, starting a mass exodus… it seems like you angels have a lot of knowledge, yeah?”

“Well, yes. I am very knowledgeable of Scripture and the Law, and of God's will.”

“But yet despite that knowledge you seemed almost completely ignorant of your own body and the nature of angels. You seem at first very narrow in your thinking, but you guys are fucking smart. All I've had to do is casually bring up talking points that don't really compute for you and you're willing to reconsider your entire worldview, probably because it takes way more effort for such an intelligent being to accept blatant gaslighting than the god damn truth.” Isaiah said. “When me and Aethriel first had sex it didn't even know it could have an orgasm. You were both aware of course of the Nephilim, but outside of the vague knowledge that angels have the ability to impregnate humans it had never occurred to either of you that sex may be a base desire present in all angels, it's normal, and not only is it normal but God 1. Already knows because He’s the one who made you that way, and 2. Intentionally designed you to have that kind of desire knowing full well He would punish you if you ever acted on it.”

“...Maybe it is a test of our faith.” Edon suggested.

“Yeah well it's a stupid fucking test, why's He always TESTING people? That's manipulative fucking behavior. And of course God knows that because typically only the most devoted human followers of God ever get the chance to see and talk to an angel, because that's all He gives permission for, because he knows a non-worshipper like me would rock your fucking world and destroy your belief in His horseshit. And as an extra layer of protection He makes you look like a terrifying fire creature made of wheels to scare the shit out of less prepared non-worshippers just in case. I mean, that shit doesn’t work on me, I think you assholes are beautiful, but still. I get that He gave you angels free will because without it He'd actually have to do his job and He couldn't really send you out to do complex tasks without essentially programming you. But He also clearly gave you a sexuality-”

“That is for making new angels!” Edon cut him off. “And nothing more. Thrones reproduce sexually, but we are only supposed to do it on orders from God. Very few of us are ever chosen and the act is… less than romantic… but that is the reason!” The Throne explained. “It is easier to have two angels procreate than to custom build a new one.”

“Okay, and where exactly does your desire to knot a human come into play? Or your desire for Seraph teeth in your wheels?”

“...Inter-choir hybrids are very common, and sometimes authorized… We are simply sorted into one or the other choir depending on how we turn out…” It weakly explained. “I am actually a Principality/Throne hybrid, technically Ophanim don't have wings, and a lot of them have spokes.” Isaiah looked at it in disagreement, and vaguely wondered what fucking Principality Edon was genetically half of.

“So what? Does He want human angel hybrids?”

“No!”

“I rest my fucking case!” Isaiah said, leaning back against a pillow. “It sucks because you guys are actually kind of cool. You're these sexy hyper intelligent divine beings, but you're used almost exclusively to execute the shitty will of a childish and vengeful God. You're kept in line by that piece of shit putting the idea of thought crimes in your head, and of course the use of excessive physical force and brutal disfigurement as punishments for minor infractions. That combined with the isolation of Heaven and the restricted communication even inter-choir leads to a population of angels that are so traumatized they can barely function day to day much less use their divine knowledge for anything THEY want to pursue. It's like He gave you free will just because it would be less work for Him, but He really has no desire for you to use it unless you're choosing to unquestioningly worship Him while constantly denying yourself basic things like rest and love and safety. He doesn't love you. And if that knowledge is passed on into heaven, we wouldn’t even have to physically throw down. Angels would start leaving just like Aethriel did. The effort of tracking them all down for destruction would just be too much, especially if what, like, 30% of angels leave? Then falling from heaven wouldn't even be scary anymore. Everyone would be free to fall, free to choose something different.”

“...I made breakfast.” Aethriel said, standing in the doorway holding three plates. Venison sausage from Isaiah's freezer supply, eggs, and some kind of extremely grain heavy bread that Isaiah definitely hadn't bought from the store.

“Aww, thank you!” Isaiah said, trying to lighten the mood.

“Thank you.” Edon followed suit, wanting to be polite. Angels do not HAVE to eat, but it really does feel nice to do it.

“So,” Aethriel said as they ate, “Isaiah had the whole… heaven conversation… with you, too?”

“We spoke of theology, yes. You saw the end of it.” Edon replied.

“It is a lot to process.” Aethriel acknowledged. “What do you think about a propaganda campaign? And do you have any ideas on how to get information into heaven on a large scale?”

“Will you two stop organizing a goddamn political movement for like a few hours, please?!” Edon exclaimed, “I am not in a good headspace to help you with anything right now.” Its mind felt fuzzy. Its bite marks ached beautifully. For centuries, it now acknowledged, it had hoped it would feel this way the day after getting bitten. It wanted to feel those indents for weeks.

“Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you.” Isaiah said. “Now that you've had sex you're probably going to start having heat cycles.” He finished his eggs.

“What?!” Edon exclaimed.

“From my understanding it is a monthly occurrence, kind of like humans have menstrual periods.” Aethriel explained. “It lasts three to six days and in those days you will experience extremely heightened libido, intense desire for physical contact, and diminished ability to successfully self pleasure to any type of completion or relief without some type of other party involvement.”

“And you're gonna cum a lot more, volume wise.”

“And be more easily fatigued.”

“And-”

“Alright, alright, enough!!!” Edon said, “How do I make it stop?”

“... Remember how I said it was like a menstrual period?” Aethriel said. “It does not stop. You can try to ignore it, but… I have tried that. It does not help. Once, Isaiah pulled three 16 hour shifts in a row and it happened directly at the start of a 3 day heat cycle. It was miserable.”

“For both of us.” Isaiah chimed in. “This big baby couldn't cum unless I was at least holding the vibrator. You fucking followed my rig around for ten hours on the third day, I have never in my life run a more difficult BLS call…”

“I said I was sorry…?”

“You gotta start fucking other humans in addition to me!” Isaiah said. “Honestly both of you should try fucking other humans. Or I guess fucking each other. That would probably work too.”

“Can we stay on topic, please?!” Edon interjected. “When is this going to begin?”

“It probably already started.” Isaiah said. “Are you feeling a little bit floaty, a little out of it?”

“Tired?”

“Confused?”

“Submissive?”

“Turned on?”

“I… guess so?” It replied, attempting to search itself. “I do not know about submissive… and how would either of us even begin to go about finding another human to fuck? Would that not be extremely difficult when we do not know the social rules?”

“I mean…” Isaiah trailed off. “That is kind of a good question. It's not like you two can just walk into a bar casually.”

“Why not?” Edon asked.

“Because you're an eldritch being from heaven engulfed in a perpetual flame?” Isaiah said.

“Well, yeah, but…” Edon closed its eyes and the text scrawled on the inside of its wheels glowed that pretty green again. There was a soft flash of light, and suddenly, in the place of the Throne sat a fairly strange looking but definitely passable human. “We can disguise ourselves. I just do not understand how getting drunk at a bar is going to help either of us get laid if while sober we would both struggle with communication.”

“...I would like to go on record saying I did not know that was something we could do.” Aethriel said.

Isaiah was still just staring. Edon was such a fucking twink. It sat nakedly in his bed staring back at them. It was a bit taller than Isaiah. Its body was lithe, with just the barest hint of abs, but that was more a product of the "kinda malnourished" look it had going on rather than actual built musculature. Two very small and soft looking breasts, maybe AA cups at the very biggest, graced its narrow chest. Its skin was a soft bronze tone and it had short, curly dark hair and a short beard that looked very much like that was all the angel could grow. One of its green eyes was missing from its socket. Its (circumcised) dick was definitely half hard between its legs, and it was pretty clear to Isaiah that it was well endowed with a good 6 inches. If he had to guess, he'd say Edon looked like it was in its late 20s, maybe early 30s. If Isaiah had to name this look it would for sure be “iron age otter.”

“How the fuck did you do that?!” Aethriel demanded.

“How do you not know?!” Edon asked. “About five hundred years ago God decided all the angels should have a human disguise just in case. Did no one tell you?”

“Nobody tells me anything!!” Aethriel exclaimed. “Did you get to choose how you looked as a human?”

“No!”

“How do you do it?!”

“Focus like you're trying to change size. But just kind of… picture yourself, but as a human. Same way you'd turn into a dove!” Edon replied like this was easy.

Aethriel gave it a try, and in another soft flash of light, there sat the Seraph in human form.

Aethriel was much taller than both of them. It immediately had to brush its hair out of its eyes as its long, almost bleach blonde looking curls much lighter than the rest of its body fell around its face. It looked down at them with its bright blue eyes. It had incredibly soft and fairly small tits, just a bit more noticeable than Edon’s. It had a very full and soft looking whitish-blond happy trail leading to an even more inviting looking bush that Isaiah could really only describe as heavenly. The soft pink head of its clit poked out from between its labia. It was a wide set, strong looking human, with evident musculature that neither had nor needed definition to show power. Its right shoulder and part of its back bore an irregular scar and it held that arm slightly differently than the left one. Isaiah's cool name for this look would probably be something like “bleach blonde medieval shepherd.”

“Wow!” it said. “How long can we stay like this?” Isaiah wordlessly handed Aethriel his phone with the front camera on so it could inspect its face.

“It starts getting almost unbearably uncomfortable a day or two,” Edon responded. “It is comfortable for a few hours.”

“Hey, that’s long enough to go to a bar.” Isaiah said, “Actually, there’s this place I haven’t been in a while but used to be one of my old haunts. It’s called Smokey’s. You guys should come with me tonight. Give me back my phone.” He said to Aethriel, who did so. He looked up their website and scrolled till he found their events page. “Hey, haha, look, they’re doing a funny little Heaven and Hell themed event since those protesters started showing up at their drag shows. You guys will fit RIGHT in, there’s gonna be so many other ex-Christians there.” The webpage showed an event which invites participants to “come sin with us.”

“I don’t know, Isaiah.” Edon replied. “That seems… a little much, does it not?”

“Oh shut up! You’re literally a fallen angel.” Isaiah responded. “Plus people won’t think it’s weird if you slip up and say some fuckshit about God or something. They’ll just think you’re really devoted to the theme.”

“Hey! I am not a fallen angel yet!” Edon protested.

“I do believe knotting a human is likely to put you into that category,” Aethriel backed him up, “Are you planning on going back to heaven?”

“... I don’t know WHAT I’m planning! Yesterday I thought I was going to turn you two in to God. Now I’m a renegade fallen angel all of a sudden. I don’t know what to do, I don’t have a plan, I do not know what to think.” It said all at once. Aethriel embraced the poor thing, sensing it was about to cry. “Fuck it. Let’s go to this thing.”

The three beings decided it might be a good idea to spend the day trying to find at least some club-appropriate clothing for the two angels. Isaiah wanted to also just… evaluate how well they did visibly in public. He knew of a fairly chill thrift store, which he mentioned because oh God, the price tag on this was going to be steep, but Aethriel offered to just steal everything like it had been doing for the past few months anyway. So he offered to supervise them at the mall.

“Somewhere in these mountains I have a huge stash of fun shiny objects,” It proudly stated, as they flew over them.

“... Someday you’re gonna have to show me that. Also you need to be paying me rent,” Isaiah chided. It would have been a two hour drive, but having wings comes in handy and Isaiah was easily carried for the less than ten minutes it took to fly. The angels could have gone faster, but Aethriel was worried that Isaiah would get hurt if they did that.

The two angels subtly changed into human forms (and the clothing Isaiah had lent them and carried with them on this flight) and they all walked into the mall together.

The angels were both shocked at the vast options they were now presented with clothing wise. Isaiah's “style” if you could call it that was mainly his paramedic uniform and jeans from highschool. He hated shopping. Isaiah was incredibly nervous that one or both of them was going to start freaking out about something in the mall, or worse, HE was going to start freaking out. Isaiah hadn't remembered how uncomfortable he was in stores. It had been ages since he’d been to a mall, and the department store they started out in was making him feel like a cockroach in an occupied kitchen.

“Where should we go first?” Asked Edon, “What do humans typically wear to bars these days?”

“Okay, that? That right there? That’s the kind of thing you can’t be saying in public,” Isaiah explained. “You’re a human, remember?”

“Oh, right. I mean, what kind of clothes are appropriate for this event?”

“Clubwear. So like, think sexy. Revealing. Hot. A department store is probably not where we wanna be looking first. We should try something a bit edgier.” Isaiah replied. “I remember there was a store called Jude’s Palace or something that sold a lot of stuff like that, let’s see if it’s still open.”

He led the angels through the mall, watching with cautious amusement as they took in the sights and sounds and seemed genuinely happy to be exploring the human world. There weren’t a ton of people here today, but there were enough that the angels were getting some human interaction. Aethriel was easily able to steal two backpacks, one for each of them by Isaiah’s request, as he insisted on them each having a place to store their stuff. He also insisted on them each at least getting a pair of jeans that fit and shoes they could wear instead of his, as neither Edon nor Aethriel could fit in his shoes pretty much at all. Everything else was up to them as long as they were the ones stealing it and as long as it fit in the backpacks.

Aethriel wanted to try every single soap and scented thing available at the soap and candle stores they walked past, much to Edon and Isaiah’s displeasure as it made them both sneeze. Edon was genuinely upset upon being told it wasn’t able to try on any of the diamond jewelry behind the glass cases at a jewelry store they went past, but cheered up when Isaiah explained that Jude’s Palace would have plenty of flashy stuff it could try on. Isaiah considered asking Aethriel to steal him some shoes, but decided against it as he really didn’t want to stay here any longer than he had to, and shoe shopping was something he PARTICULARLY hated doing. Eventually they made it to Jude’s Palace, and had managed to at least get Edon some shoes (basic black brandless converse type shoes) and Aethriel some jeans (It had insisted on getting boot cut jeans with sequins sewed into the fabric.)

“Okay guys. This store is a little bit crowded and loud, so, just please don’t freak out.” Isaiah said, standing in front of the neon sign reading “JUDE’S PALACE.”

“It seems like we should be the ones saying that to you,” Aethriel commented, seeing how nervous Isaiah looked.

“Yeah, well, look, guys, I don’t do this very often, okay? Let’s just grab some shit and go.” They entered the store. The lights were low, the racks were spaced very closely together, and the angels realized that this store sells clothing that vastly differs from the other stores they had seen so far. These clothing pieces covered a lot less, were made from much different fabrics, and were highly irregular and had flashier colors. Aethriel held up a bright pink crop top with the word “ONAHOLE” written across the front in bright orange, silver-bordered letters.

“What does onahole mean?” It asked, innocently.

“I don’t think you’re ready for me to explain that to you yet,” Isaiah said, turning around just in time to see Edon putting on a metric ton of cheap but flashy jewelry and looking at itself in the mirror. It was getting the chains stuck in its hair. This was going to take a while.

After many, many outfits (and a slight mishap where Isaiah caught Edon and Aethriel making out in the changing room, which normally would have turned him on something awful but considering this was a public mall and he was technically responsible for these two idiots, it was more panic inducing than sexy,) the two angels finally decided on something to wear to this event:

Aethriel went with a ridiculously short, bright white, bodycon minidress with a mock neck. When I say ridiculously short, I mean ridiculously short: if it had a dick, this would not cover it. The front of the dress had a boob window in the shape of a heart. When asked if it wanted to also grab some underwear, as there was no way in hell that thing was going to stay down and actually keep its pussy covered, it proceeded to pick out legitimately one of the sluttiest thongs Isaiah had ever seen, claiming that it was “more comfortable” than something with more coverage. It also picked out a cross necklace (“To fit the theme!”) and some dainty looking white ballet flats.

(IMAGE CREDIT: burning-sol on tumblr drew this absolutely gorgeous art piece!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is an amazing artist who also does streams!!!! Check it out!!!)

Edon went with some extremely low rise tight black skinny jean type pants with tons of fake gold chains and studs attached. It showed off both its... very flat ass and its hip bones beautifully. It also picked out a shiny gold mesh shirt and a black tube top bralette type garment that was so small that it covered its nipples and very little else. Of course, it insisted on jewelry; clip on earrings, shiny bracelets (it particularly enjoyed the Evil Eye ones,) and a necklace that said “FAITH” in delicate letters.

“Let’s get out of here,” Isaiah practically begged them after spending at least two hours in this one store. He opted to wear his fire station T-shirt and the same jeans he always did.

+++

They landed in the woods behind the parking lot at Smokey’s so that the angels could get dressed. Aethriel needed help getting zipped into the dress, and Edon had to be reassured that no, nobody was going to say anything about its chest.

“And if they do, I’ll threaten them for you.” Isaiah finished, leading the two out of the woods. “Okay, so, I know we went over this before but, remember: At least one of you has to be able and willing to fly me home after this. My place is a perfectly fine sex venue if anyone wants to get out of here with you, but PLEASE don’t reveal that you’re a literal angel, you’re going to cause a mass panic. Also there is a non zero chance there may be protesters, that is the reason that they’re even holding this themed night after all.” Isaiah explained. “And please, if you see anyone who looks like they’re an angel in disguise that isn’t either of you two, please alert me, okay? We can make a cool exit and avoid the problem.”

“Understood.” Aethriel said, and Edon nodded in agreement. Fun dance music played audibly from the building as the three beings got in the fairly long line to get in; they’d arrived just before opening time.

Just as Isaiah was starting to think that maybe there wouldn’t be protestors, a group of about ten to fifteen people holding dumbass signs pulled up in two church vans. They filed out of the vehicles, pulling out their megaphones and equipment and acting like they couldn’t even see the line of party attendees until all their shit was set up. They murmured amongst themselves before starting their pathetic little display, made more pathetic by the fact that they brought a whole grill setup presumably because this was some kind of social event for them, chanting bible verses and political slogans, claiming that the attendees were somehow victimizing them, and making personal attacks aimed at specific people in line about the sin of their outfits or the way they looked. People in line kind of just pretended like it wasn’t even happening, electing to ignore the harassment at first. A few people made direct eye contact with a protestor or two while they kissed their partners, or flipped them off, or shouted “fuck off!” or something, but from Isaiah’s perspective this was nothing that crazy or new. Nobody was getting shot or threatened yet. Edon looked INCREDIBLY uncomfortable, however. It stared at its feet and absolutely refused to look at the protestors or their signs. As the line moved up and the three friends approached the area the protestors were mainly standing, Edon stood partially behind Aethriel and Isaiah.

“YOU TRANNY FAG SINNERS WILL BURN! God HATES sin, God HATES you, you DISGUST regular people and God!” The main protestor guy shouted, pointing directly at Aethriel as it adjusted its dress. Isaiah squeezed its hand as a warning to just not say anything, just walk past, but before he could even open his mouth Aethriel was already engaging.

“What did you just say to me?” It said, louder than it should have been able to as a human.

“Aethriel, let’s just go in.” Isaiah tried to say, pulling at its arm.

“What kind of fucking fag name is that?” The guy asked, “I can’t even tell what you think you’re supposed to be!”

“You are not glorifying God by doing this. This, this whole thing you are doing? It makes His followers look stupid,” Aethriel said. “You are not even translating that verse correctly, not by a long shot. What translation even is that? The ESV?” It said, pointing at his sign that said some shit about women being subservient.

“What would you faggots know about glorifying God? You are a blatant slap in the face to His perfect creation!” The guy yelled back. Isaiah attempted to physically pull Aethriel away from this guy, to no avail.

“We are not doing this!” He said, “This conversation is fucking OVER, we’re going inside, fuck off, bible guy, come on, Aethriel!”

“I can tell you this much, I have glorified God a lot longer than you have,” It said, not listening to Isaiah at all, “and I assure you, I am a much more perfect creation than you could ever be.”

“Listen to your ugly tranny friend,” The guy continued, “You should feel guilty walking out in public looking that way. Go inside, go away.”

“Aethriel-” Edon started, really just wanting this to be over.

“No, I will not! You want to talk theology, let us talk theology! Go ahead!” It challenged, “I see that your head is not covered appropriately in reverence. I see that your clothing is of mixed fabrics. It is the Sabbath day, and you are working. You eat pork and meats with blood in them. I can absolutely bet that you have never made a proper burnt offering to the Lord, either.” The guy attempted to say something, but Aethriel went on, holding out a finger to shut him up. “Your children over there are far too close together in age, you and your wife did not abide by Leviticus 12:5, as she was unclean for 80 days, not the six weeks you MAYBE waited. And speaking of your wife, she looks a little… genetically similar to you. Fucking your family… That is a sin, you know.” People in line were cheering the Seraph on. Even Isaiah actually laughed at the incest joke.

“She’s not my sister!”

“Funny, I did not specify sister, did I? Please, go on. Correct me.”

“AETHRIEL!” Edon finally shouted, “Stop quoting Leviticus, I want to go to the party. Let’s go inside.”

“Okay. Alright.” Aethriel said, calming down a little bit. People were staring at the three of them, but it actually seemed like it was in a good way. “Let us party.”

Isaiah was really unsure of how positive or negative that interaction went. On one hand, nobody got injured and Aethriel did somehow manage to get that guy to shut the fuck up and stop harassing people for now. On the other hand, that whole thing probably just put a huge target on all three of their backs, and potentially endangered other partygoers. Not to mention this was now a whole thing, and people were probably going to try and talk to them.

“I’m adding a new rule,” Isaiah said, “No talking about the bible, no saying odd esoteric religious shit, no engaging with bigots. I appreciate your efforts, Aethriel, but that can actually be dangerous. We gotta watch our backs now, we could get jumped on our way out of here.”

The inside of Smokey’s was dark and loud. There was a stage area with a DJ setup and a pit in front of the stage for dancing. There was a bar, and a hallway that led to the bathrooms. There was also another hallway that Isaiah knew led to a darkroom and an outdoor patio. He pointed to all these places, especially pointing out the bathrooms, as he was under the impression that at the very least Aethriel would not be very adjusted to having a human body that has different needs. Trying to explain how pissing worked at the mall was a challenge that Isaiah really did not want to have to encounter for a second time here, at a loud and crowded bar. He still wasn’t sure Aethriel really understood, which was frustrating.

The bar had opted to put their fun disco lights on, making radial patterns on the floor which absolutely dazzled the angels, especially Edon, who was dazzled out of its upsetness about the whole scene outside.

“Wow… it’s beautiful.” It commented, trying to figure out where the light was shining from. “What’s that noise?”

“It’s EDM.” Isaiah explained, “Electronic dance music.”

“This isn’t music,” Edon said, “Music has singing, and instruments sometimes.”

“Okay, damn, elitist as fuck. Just enjoy it.”

“I am enjoying it!” Edon said, crossing its arms. “Still isn’t music though.”

“They have alcohol here, right?” Aethriel asked.

“Yeah, the bar is over there, but we don’t have money.” Isaiah said. “So you’re gonna have to seduce someone and have them buy you a drink. Honestly after that scene outside I’m sure you’ll find someone. Also be careful-”

“Yes, I know, I know. I will not drink too much.” The Seraph said, giggling, “You worry too much! Just have fun, remember?”

“You worry too little!” Isaiah said. “You are a human right now. I have no idea how this shit works, maybe your tolerance is still crazy high, but even 15 shots can kill a normal human.”

The three stayed together for a little while as the club got more crowded, but as the angels got more comfortable with the environment, they began to split off from Isaiah to pursue their own thing. Aethriel went right to the bar, and Edon wanted to go out to the patio. Isaiah lost sight of them for a good while while he poured himself some water and tried to find a comfortable space to chill, really not anticipating anyone wanting to speak to him.

He slowly re-explored Smokey's, checking out how much it had changed in just a year. Looks like they put more money into this place. He went to the dance floor to watch people dance together (and thought about joining,) and checked out the currently mostly empty dark room and patio, then walked back around to lean against the wall near the fire exit. He smiled as he watched some woman grab Aethriel’s ass while it downed another shot. Isaiah looked over towards the other end of the bar, and saw Edon rejecting some blue haired twink that seemed pretty interested in it in favor of a huge, shirtless bear. Funny enough, the twink was dressed in what Isaiah perceived to be a missionary outfit. Pristine pressed white dress shirt, light blue tie, dark navy close fitting dress pants, black dress shoes. His hair was perfectly combed and styled. Very funny. My job here is done, Isaiah thought, Now time to fuckin’ stand around until the bar closes, I guess. Maybe I could get Aethriel to share one of those drinks with me.

“Hey.” Said a voice right beside Isaiah, scaring him. He whipped around to see another guy standing there. The guy was wearing some obscure band t-shirt, a flannel, and dirty ripped jeans, with even dirtier work boots. He had a backwards hat on. He looked, for lack of a better term, very mentally unwell. “You with that tall blonde chick over there?”

“Uh, no, we aren't dating.” Isaiah said, looking the guy up and down. He felt bad doing this but he mentally clocked the guy as probably trans also, and he assumed that the guy was trying to figure out if Aethriel was fair game even though it was pretty clearly making out with a random butch at the bar right now.

“No, no, I don't care about that. I mean like you guys came in together right? And that chick in the gold mesh shirt? They're walking to the bathroom now.” He pointed at Edon who had disappeared into the crowd, closely followed by that bear.

“Why do you ask?” Isaiah said, suspicious.

“I just feel like I should warn you that they aren't what you think they are.” The man said. “Look I'm trying to do you a favor here, and I know this sounds insane but I have experience with this kind of thing, especially recently. I would ditch them, ASAP. If you need a ride home I can drive you. They're dangerous.”

“What makes you say that??” Isaiah asked, incredulous.

“I know this is gonna sound crazy, but I'm like 90% sure they're both angels. Well. I'm 100% sure the blonde chick is an angel. Your other friend might just be rude and transphobic. Either way I'd ditch them. That weird blue haired guy dressed like a missionary gives me weird vibes as well but, I didn't talk to him so, I have no proof or anything. Be careful.”

Isaiah was speechless as he decided whether or not to drop the act or be amazed. “What the fuck??” Isaiah said. “How the fuck did you know that?”

“Aha! I was right!” He said. “They ARE angels. Why are you voluntarily hanging out with angels?? You know they can easily kill you right?”

“First tell me who the fuck you are and how you know they're angels.” Isaiah said.

“Look, life hasn't exactly been very normal for me recently.” He started. “Shit has been going off the rails. I learned how to identify angels real quick after the first three of them showed up to yell at me. I was like, woah, man, I didn't fuck your seraph!!! I have no idea who Isaiah is, he's not me, I've never had sex with an angel. That guy must have really pissed God off.” The dude said. Isaiah stared at him. “My name's Ezekiel by the way.”

Isaiah took a sip of his water nervously.

“Wait. Are YOU Isaiah?!!” Isaiah nodded. “FUCK man, that explains a lot. Okay. Well. Carry on then.” Ezekiel pushed off the wall and began to walk away.

“Hey hey hey! Wait! Come back here!” Isaiah shouted. “You never explained how you knew they were angels!”

“Well, for starters, your blonde friend over there can REALLY handle their liquor. Sure they're tall, but I personally witnessed them take six shots pretty much in a row and they're still standing upright, and they’re still drinking. But like, way before that, when I first went to talk to them, I said I liked their shoes and they responded by saying “thank you, it is my first day wearing shoes.” Which really didn't make any sense at all. They said a few words in Hebrew because they “forgot the English ones” and I mentioned that I also speak Hebrew. They seemed excited about that so we switched languages, but they were really hard to understand, using a really weird grammatical structure. Then I asked where they were from or if they grew up around here and they were like, “I cannot tell you.” And I was like okay, that's… fine, I guess, but the reason I asked is because I fluently speak Hebrew and I can barely understand when you're speaking in sentences. This isn't like, modern Hebrew. Are you a scholar or something? I'm intrigued by this.” Isaiah pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I was very fucking specific. I said no odd esoteric religious shit, I said no speaking ancient Hebrew to people at the bar… well, I didn't say that SPECIFICALLY but I assumed it would be common sense…”

“And then,” Ezekiel continued, “They were like, ‘By your standards? You could say that. May I see your hand?’ And then I handed them my hand. And they were like, ‘Wow, your hand is so soft and warm… I have heard there is a dark room here where it is permissible for human beings, which we both are, to have sexual intercourse. Would you like to go there with me and fist me?’ and then I was like, sure, okay. Then that other guy, the one in the gold mesh shirt, pulled the blonde one to the side and started yelling at them in Latin. So I said-”

“God fucking- okay. Look. I'm sorry to cut you off, Ezekiel, is it? I'm gonna have to have a word with my friends real quick. Do you wanna take down my number in case we get separated before we can answer each other's questions tonight?”

“I was about to ask.” the man said. Isaiah put his number in his phone.

“Did you fist it?” He asked, handing the phone back.

“... I mean. Fisting is a strong word.” Ezekiel replied, taking back his phone. “But… if you're asking if I know what the inside of its pussy feels like, yes, yes I do. God. I wish I had a dick.”

“I’ll give you that, Aethriel is pretty nice… okay, I gotta go stop this asshole before anyone else catches on.”

“Godspeed.” Ezekiel said, taking a sip of his martini.

Isaiah looked around and couldn't see Aethriel or Edon anywhere. Panicking, he sent a text message to Ezekiel telling him to text him if he saw either of them. Thinking about it, he figured a good place to check for these two would be the dark room. He walked down the hall, checking the outside patio along the way but didn’t see them. Damn. Maybe they're somewhere in that huge crowd. Edon especially doesn't stand out, it could be possible. Isaiah continued anyway, just wanting to rule out the darkroom. As he rounded the corner, he saw that blue haired missionary twink standing outside the darkroom door, crying.

“Hey, are you alright?” Isaiah asked.

“No, I am NOT alright!!!” He said, eyes red, tears streaming down his face. “I am TERRIFIED, I am confused, I am alone and I am doing a terrible job!”

“Hey, hey, it's okay!” Isaiah said. “There's no job to do. This is a party, you're here to have fun! Have you been here before?”

“NO!” He practically screamed, which shocked Isaiah. He seemed offended that Isaiah would say something like that. “WHY would you think that someone like ME, that I would do something like that?! Do I look like a whore to you? Do I look like a SLUT, is that what you are saying?!”

“No, I'm not saying that. I'm sorry, I'm actually pretty confused… let's start this over. What's your name?”

“...I don't want to tell you.” He said.

“Okay. Well. I like your costume? It fits the theme, it's really like you just got back from giving a sermon.”

“It's NOT a costume. This is just basic, decent clothing for a basic, decent person! Unlike almost everyone else here, I am a man of GOD.”

“Are you a protestor?” Isaiah asked. “Y'know the rest of your fuckbuddies left like an hour ago. You didn't have to come inside. Or are you really only upset because my buddy rejected you?”

“I'm not with them! Okay! I'm just overwhelmed. I don't like it here, I never should have come.”

“Why did you come to a queer club if you're uncomfortable with queer people dressed in skimpy outfits?!” Isaiah asked.

“I am only here to meet up with someone, that is all!” The guy said. “And I cannot even find them! This person is my ride home!” He said, “I know he is here. I… I just know it.”

“Ohh, I see. So you went on Grindr after giving your sermon, came here for the first time unprepared and nervous and now you can’t find the guy. I understand. Okay. Well. If you agree to shut the fuck up and stop judging people, I'm willing to help you out.” Isaiah said. “I’ll help you find this guy.”

“... I do not have much of a choice now!” He finally said, sniffing. “It is trust you, or never find who I am looking for…”

“Can I touch you, just for comfort purposes?” Isaiah asked. The man froze at first, folding his arms, but slowly nodded yes as tears continued to fall. Isaiah gave him a hug. He practically melted into the touch, grasping at Isaiah’s shirt as his tears soaked into the fabric on his shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. Look, I’m looking for my friends, too, because they’re making bad choices right now and I need to stop them before they make a fool of themselves. Maybe we can work together.”

“That sounds… good.” The man said.

“My name’s…” Isaiah paused for a second, thinking about what Ezekiel said about this blue haired missionary guy. I dunno, he doesn’t seem like an angel, Isaiah thought. Much too steady on his feet and not slutty enough. He just seems like a naive young dude, probably homeschooled, straight to seminary, only learned he was gay like a month ago, feels like a sinner… I get it. But just in case… “Frank.”

“Nice to meet you, Frank. My name is Tahir.”

“So, who are you looking for? What’s he look like?”

“I am not sure how to describe him... he is... he looks... generic. Like. A generic... man.” Tahir admitted. “Um… but I know he is a slut. Would fuck anything that moves,” Tahir said. “I believe he is likely wearing some sort of amulet, or strange looking gold necklace…”

“Oh, you gotta introduce me to this guy. He sounds like fun.” Isaiah joked. “I’m looking for a tall, buff, very drunk and sloppy blonde in a very ‘pussy out’ dress, and that guy that rejected you at the bar.”

“I was not attempting to seduce that person!” Tahir said. “I simply wanted to inquire if he was the one I was looking for, but he did not even stop to speak to me! He just held up his hand, said, ‘I am not into hair dye, you look like the police,’ and started making out with the next closest man!”

“Pff, that’s hilarious. They're like that, I think. I dunno, we met pretty recently. Okay, let’s look in the dark room first.”

“Wait, wait!” Tahir said. “I… do not know if I am ready for that. Are not people having… intercourse, in there?”

“Tahir, look. You wanna find this guy, right?”

“Y-yeah…”

“And you yourself told me he’s a slut. So where else would he be?”

“Y-you… are probably right. Okay. Let’s do this.” The two men walked into the room. It was MUCH more crowded now. The first thing Isaiah noticed was that the Seraph was not in there. The second thing he noticed was the wall-to-wall fucking ORGY that was happening. Most people were in some state of undress. A lot of dicks were out, and those that weren’t were in mouths and asses. It was pretty dark in there, but not dark enough for visibility to be zero. Aethriel would stand out, he thought. Where the fuck were they?! Isaiah continued to look around for Edon, moving fairly quickly, dodging hands and trying to scope out the place before he got pulled in, splitting off from Tahir.

Not one minute into the search, someone grabbed Tahir’s ass. He jolted, trying to move away from the guy’s hands on instinct, only to realize he was entirely trapped between people, as the crowd pressed in from all sides. He just barely caught a glance of the back of Isaiah’s head before he too, like the exit, disappeared out of sight. Oh. Oh, no. Suddenly, he felt like he was being touched everywhere. There were hands on his shoulders, in his hair, grabbing his ass, waist, and hips, snaking slowly between his thighs. Heat spread through his body. He couldn’t make himself push them away. He didn’t WANT to push them away. It quickly became very, very pleasurable. Far too pleasurable for even Tahir to deny, as he leaned into the erotic touch. This couldn’t be happening. He wanted to scream at his inner conflict, but nothing came out.

Even worse, he was harder than he’d ever been in his life.

Feelings flooded his body. Immodest feelings. Immoral feelings. He cursed lightly under his breath as a hand made its way down the back of his pants, and he felt horror rise in his chest as he realized how badly he wanted to press INTO that touch, and how badly he wanted the guy to reach lower, how badly he wanted to be defiled, penetrated by this random stranger…

“No, NO!” He finally forced himself to say, more to himself than to the people feeling him up, “Stop touching me! Let me out!” The guy with his hand down Tahir’s pants took it out, and people began letting go of Tahir and kind of getting out of his way as he went to the exit on shaky legs. He looked around for Isaiah, for some familiarity, no matter how flimsy.

Isaiah stood outside the door, looking around for Tahir. He had lost sight of the guy while looking for Edon and decided he’d probably gotten uncomfortable and left. He’d only looked around briefly to the right and left before the blue haired man shoved his way out of the dark room and back into the hallway, shaking and trying not to cry.

“Are you okay??”

“Let’s just go l-look somewhere else.” Tahir said, continuing to walk, not even waiting for Isaiah.

“Did something happen?” He asked, matching Tahir’s stride.

“No. Nothing happened. I just really did not like it there, and I got stuck for a minute. That is all.” He said.

“Okay. I mean, it’s alright if you did do something, too. That’s what the dark room is for.” Isaiah explained.

“Are you insinuating I would ever ENJOY something like that?!”

“Uh, yeah, yeah I am.” Isaiah said. “It feels nice to get touched.”

“It did NOT feel nice!” He insisted.

“Oh, shit, wait, did someone forcefully touch you?” Isaiah asked, grabbing Tahir’s arm to prevent him from slamming directly into a wall as he was not looking where he was going in the slightest. “Hey, if someone did that, we’re gonna go tell a bouncer, okay? That’s not fucking okay of them and they need to be kicked the fuck out.”

“N-no! I was not forcibly touched, I said no and the pleasure stopped- I mean, nobody touched me at all!” He insisted again, painfully aware that his story was falling apart. Isaiah looked the man up and down. Those tight little business slacks were NOT hiding anything, he noticed. It was very obvious to him upon a brief inspection that Tahir was absolutely rock hard, and so turned on he could barely keep himself standing upright.

“Nobody touched you at all?”

“Nobody. And even if they did I would have derived no pleasure from it!!” Tahir insisted, softly. He looked so sweaty. He was a bad liar.

“Are you sure? Because to me, it seems like you got felt up in there and that you REALLY liked it, if your hard on is anything to go by.”

“I would… never…” He said, even softer. Isaiah grabbed his other arm and gently pressed him into the wall he'd almost slammed into on accident, making sure to be mindful of any indication that Tahir wanted him to stop. 

“Nobody is judging you, okay? Nobody is here except you and me, and everyone else at this club. We're lost in the crowd. It’s okay to have fun. It’s okay to like being touched. I know you’ve been told it's a sin by the Church, but it's natural to want these things.” Isaiah said, letting go of one of his arms to gently trace the angle of Tahir’s jaw. He closed his eyes, pressing his face into the touch almost as if it were on instinct. He told himself it was just instinct, anyway.

“What are you planning to do to me…?” Tahir asked, eyes opening, locked on Isaiah’s.

“I was going to start with a kiss.” He stated.

“I… I think I would enjoy that.” He said. He desperately tried to rationalize his decision in his mind. Jesus kissed men. So it was okay for him to do it, too. Right? That whole thing in the darkroom was unrelated… He closed his eyes as Isaiah leaned down and kissed him softly. Tahir reached with his free hand and guided Isaiah’s hand from his jaw to his waist. It was a very tame kiss from Isaiah's point of view, but Tahir was burning up inside. His head was spinning. He wanted more.
On their third or fourth kiss, Isaiah could very easily tell that Tahir wanted more. He pressed his body a little closer to the shorter man, slotting his thigh between Tahir’s legs to give him something to grind on.

“Let me know if you want me to stop,” he reminded him. Tahir made a soft sound of displeasure when Isaiah took his lips off of his.

“Please shut up,” he said, “just continue kissing me!” Isaiah obliged. Tahir told himself he was just ‘adjusting his position’ as he began to grind into Isaiah’s thigh. Fuck that felt good.

After about two more minutes of this, Tahir’s motions got more and more overtly sexual and less appropriate for the hallway. He was moaning and gripping Isaiah’s pant leg to get better purchase for the grinding as he approached orgasm. Isaiah pulled away again.

“Hey, babe, we're in the middle of a hallway.” He pointed out. “If you wanna go further, I'm sorry, we gotta go get a bathroom stall or go back to the dark room. I'm not fucking you in public.”

“W-what?! No!! We are not fucking! This is, this is just a kiss!” He insisted, trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to convince Isaiah. His much needed orgasm was fading from the list of possibilities on the table, now.

“Uh huh, it was just a kiss about a minute ago. Now you're humping my leg like a dog in heat.” He teased, ruffling the man's hair.

“I assure you, I am not.” He said, again, mostly to convince himself. He was actively still grinding on Isaiah's thigh, albeit less aggressively. He couldn't make himself stop, but the shame from that was currently outweighed by need. He would never admit how close to cumming in his pants he’d been just a second ago.

“...Okay. Well. Let's move this to a bathroom stall anyway.” Isaiah said.

“We can stay out here.”

“If we're staying out here, then I'm going to take my thigh out from between your legs and we can go back to just kissing.” Isaiah said. His phone buzzed in his pocket.

“But…” Tahir protested. Isaiah sighed, taking his thigh out from between Tahir’s legs. “Wait wait wait! Please. Please put it back.” He asked.

“If you want me to put it back, we gotta go to a more secluded area first.” He explained again. Tahir turned his gaze to the bathrooms.

+++

“Come on, Isaiah!!! Pick up!!!” Ezekiel complained, holding Aethriel’s hair behind it with one hand while it threw up outside. This was like the second time he'd called him, both times it went to voicemail after ringing for a few minutes. He hadn't been able to find Edon, but Aethriel had been very easy to locate: stumbling after the most recent woman who had been feeling it up at the bar, en route to the bathroom.

“I am-” it paused two words into the sentence to vomit again, “I am really not that drunk. Really. I… I am fine…”

“Yeah no you're not fine.” Ezekiel said.

“I need to- “ More vomiting. “I need to go back-”

“You're not going back!!! I'm trying to call your fuck buddy so he can take your drunk ass home. You hear me?! You are CUT OFF.” Ezekiel said, a little amused at its protests. “You need to drink some goddamn water.”

“Noooo!!!” It protested, but Ezekiel handed it a bottle of water anyway. It looked up at him with sad eyes. “Who… who even are you again???”

“I'm Ezekiel. I fingered you at the bar before you got trashed, remember? I know you're an angel, and Isaiah knows I know.” He said, opting to say that last sentence in Hebrew just to not draw too much attention to himself.

“Oh. Ohhh… okaaay…” It said. “Ezekiel… haha…” It struggled to stay upright.

“How much did you drink?!”

“...I stopped counting after eleven…” it admitted.

“Oh, Christ, what's wrong with you?! That's way too much, you dumbass!”

“Lllook… this is my FIRST TIME being in a human body…” it slurred, thankfully in somewhat understandable Hebrew. “You have to be NICE to me…”

“Where the fuck is your weird little friend in the gold mesh shirt?!” Ezekiel asked. “And where the fuck is Isaiah?”

“I saw Isaiah briefly…” It said, “He was with… that man… the one with the tie…”

“Where were they headed?”

“The bathrooms.”

“Oh shit. Okay. Okay, can you stand? We gotta go back in there and stop him!”

+++

Edon was not having a good night. It felt uncomfortable in line outside, got hit on by a guy who REALLY reminded it of the fucking morality police in Heaven with his stupid blue hair and just his general vibe (which it did NOT remember fondly, having lost an eye to those assholes,) had to yell at Aethriel for getting too drunk and almost blowing their cover, and it still couldn't even find ONE person who would let it fuck them raw.

Edon had been made aware of what a condom was as of tonight. It’d gotten as far as having its dick out sitting in the lap of that bear before his larger partner reached around and put a condom on the angel. Edon just looked up at him blankly, a little pissed off, and took it off.

“No thank you,” It said.

“Uh, dude,” He’d said, “This is a non-negotiable thing. If you want to fuck, you gotta wear a condom.”

“Why??” It asked, not wanting to run the risk of asking ‘what is that’ if that was one of those human things that everyone knew.

“Because I don’t want to catch anything from you, and you don’t want to catch anything from me.” He’d said.

“Like a disease?”

“Yeah, like an STD. How fucking drunk are you?” He’d asked, pushing Edon off his lap. “How do you not know about condoms?” It rolled its eyes. This is stupid! It thought, There is no way I can contract a human disease. It was VERY much of the opinion that it DIDN'T need to use one of these fucking things. It hadn’t had many sexual experiences, just the one, really, but it truly didn’t see the point in having sex if it wasn’t going to be able to fill someone with cum directly. And by God, it very much wanted to fill someone with cum directly.

Trying to explain this to humans without blowing its cover was very difficult and unfortunately a huge turn off for most of them. It tried to explain it in many ways, everything from “You should not worry, you have no womb and cannot get pregnant” to “I just can’t get off knowing there is a barrier” to “Please, please just let me do it once.” None of these explanations or lines of reasoning were very good according to its potential human partners.

To cope with just how irritated it was feeling, it had drank about 3-4 drinks worth of alcohol, from beverages purchased for it to drinks it had essentially stolen from their owners when they put them down. It was frustrated and horny and confused, and worse, not nearly drunk enough, according to Edon. What is UP with these humans? Isaiah had made it seem like they’d be ready to bang. And Aethriel sure wasn’t having trouble, it’d seen at least three different people put their hands up its dress tonight.

Fuck all of this, Edon thought, I am just going to have to try out masturbation. It made its way to the bathrooms.

+++

The bathrooms at Smokey’s were quite different than Isaiah had remembered them. He had a very clear memory of pissing there last year, when the men’s bathroom had one urinal and one toilet, and the door to the toilet stall had been entirely ripped off its hinges and was laying there on the floor. He almost just walked back out, but he had needed to pee badly enough that he’d just sucked it up for thirty seconds.

This was a real upgrade.

Now there were only gender neutral bathrooms, and there were a fuck ton of stalls, at least 14 of them, and they were nice. Wheelchair accessible. Floor to ceiling walls and everything. They really knew what they were doing. He led Tahir into one of the stalls and locked it behind him.

“Okay, sweet thing,” Isaiah said, “where were we?” Isaiah pressed him up against the door. Tahir grabbed his leg and pulled it between his own, wordlessly, resuming his grinding.

The logic he was using in his head was this: This wasn’t TECHNICALLY immoral sexual acts. TECHNICALLY it was just kissing, which is allowed because Jesus did it, and they were both fully clothed, and, technically, he was just… trying to fit into the scene… so that he could better accomplish his goal of finding this human using this theoretical cursed amulet that Cherub was speculating about. This nice human was just helping him get his bearings, helping him understand human culture... and it felt so fucking good…

Slowly, Isaiah began to kiss his neck. He slipped a hand between his thighs too, palming his erection instead of allowing him to continue grinding.

“You’re really hard.” He commented. “It’s adorable. Must be frustrating having it trapped under all those layers.”

“A-a little,” He replied.

“This might be a stupid question but, you ever had a blowjob before?” Isaiah questioned.

“No, of course not.” Tahir said. “I’m a virgin.” Isaiah interrupted the touching he was doing to unbutton Tahir’s pants. Tahir felt incredibly conflicted. He was not supposed to want this. He was not supposed to be letting this happen, he was not supposed to be helping Isaiah as he slowly and gently pulled his pants (and then briefs) off, his dick wasn’t supposed to twitch like that and leak precum while he watched Isaiah get on his knees.

“You cool if I give you your first one?” He offered, gently rubbing circles into his hip bones with his thumbs.

“Do not say it like that!!” Tahir protested. “It… it does not have to be a BLOWJOB.” He insisted, sounding frustrated.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Isaiah asked.

“It… it is not a blowjob, technically, if you…” He searched desperately for something to rationalize this. “If, um, if we both keep our pants on,” He decided, grabbing his clothing off the floor and putting it back on. He pulled his pants and underwear up to just under his balls. “And if we use a condom. Do you have a condom?”

“...Uh… I don’t think it works like that.” Isaiah said. “I really don’t think it would be more or less of a blowjob regardless of-”

“Shut up!” He said. “Shut up, shut up! You did this to me, okay, YOU got me like this,” He motioned to his erection, “and you need to fix it, and I am NOT supposed to be getting a… a… fucking blowjob!” In case anyone was wondering, Tahir was not too big, but definitely not small. His dick wasn’t very wide, and was around 4 inches. Circumcised, obviously.

“Is this some weird priest thing I’m too normal to understand?” Isaiah asked. “Does the church actually not consider it a blowjob if you use a condom? I mean, I got a condom right here.” He pulled one out of his pocket. “But if you don’t want this, please just tell me that??? I’m not gonna suck your dick if you don’t want a blowjob.”

“Look, as far as you are concerned, I AM the church!” Tahir said. “I graduated top of my fucking class. I do NOT stumble, I do NOT make mistakes, and I am telling you it DOES NOT COUNT. As long as we abide by exactly these specific rules!!!” He insisted. “You are going to put my cock in your mouth and you are going to LIKE IT. And it’s NOT a blowjob!!!”

“Okay, damn! Here! Take the condom!” Isaiah replied. He watched as his shaky hands struggled to open the package, and then struggled to get it on. “...need some help?”

“... Yes please.” He said, embarrassed. Isaiah flipped the condom around and easily slid it down his shaft. His touch felt electric.

“Happy now? Is that like, church approved or whatever?” Isaiah joked.

“...Yes. I… I think so… because… you know, we will not technically be touching! So… it is not a sin.” Tahir reasoned aloud. “Please, begin.”

“... Whatever you say dude. If you ask me a blowjob’s a blowjob, condom or not.” Isaiah replied, putting Tahir’s dick in his mouth. He relished in the sight of Tahir’s cute little face as he allowed the head of his adorable cock to rest on his tongue for a second. He wanted Tahir to take in the sight of some guy at the bar on his knees for him. Then he actually started to take more of him, holding his hips for stability as he took about half of his dick in his mouth to get him accustomed to this.

His hands flew to the back of Isaiah's head almost immediately. Oh. That was a lot, that was a sensation. His mouth was so fucking warm and wet and it just felt PERFECT, he couldn't form a concrete thought if he tried.

“Ohh!! Oh,, please, yes-!” He moaned, gripping Isaiah's hair for purchase. His back was against the bathroom door for support and yet he still almost felt like he was going to fall down. Isaiah was taking into account this dude's virginity and was trying to take it slowly and gently, using a lot of tongue. It was exactly what the little virgin needed. He would not have been able to handle it if Isaiah throated him.

Two minutes of that was all Tahir needed, before he began thrusting his hips (without Isaiah's encouragement might I add) and whining about being about to cum.
Suddenly, someone started banging on the bathroom stall door.

“ISAIAAAAH!” Arthriel shouted. “Are you in there? Let me in, please!!!” Isaiah popped Tahir’s dick out of his mouth, much to the man's displeasure. He'd almost been able to convince himself this didn't count as sex, enough to relax to a degree where he could finish…

“Hey?! I'm a little busy, dude! Can this wait? I do wanna talk to you but like, I'm sucking dick right now!” Tahir hid his face with his hands. This can't be happening, he thought for the umpteenth time tonight.

“NO!” Aethriel grabbed the door handle and shook it. Evidently, Isiah did not do a very good job of locking the door because it swung open, and the Seraph almost fell on its face as it tripped into the small room. “You CANNOT have sex with him!”

“I-It is not sex!!” Tahir protested, “We are not even touching!” Aethriel and Isaiah both looked at him with a skeptical expression.

“Why not?!” Isaiah asked Aethriel, ignoring Tahir’s weird sex hangups.

All three of them paused when they heard a loud crash coming from the stall next to them.

“IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO LET ME CUM IN YOU WITHOUT A CONDOM, I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOU ANYWHERE!!!” They heard Edon shout.

“I have to go check on that,” Aethriel slurred, “DO NOT fuck him until I get back… and do NOT let him leave!!! I am bringing some… some guy…and everything will make more sense!”

“Okay????” Isaiah said, confused. Aethriel was very visibly intoxicated, but throwing up and drinking some water was enough to at least keep it on its feet. It threw open the stall door and banged a fist on the one next to Isaiah’s.

“EDON!! EZEKIEL!!” It shouted. The door opened.

Edon was sitting on the floor, dick in hand jerking off, angry tears streaming down its face. The toilet paper holder thing was ripped off the wall and Ezekiel was standing there looking very frustrated.

“Close the door!” He demanded. “Look, we don't have time for this! We gotta get out of here!”

“What did I JUST FUCKING SAY?!” It shouted.

“Edon, I am not fucking you on the floor in this bar bathroom right immediately now!” Ezekiel said, “I need you to tell me what you know about that guy!”

“I don't fucking know! He's some guy! He has stupid hair and kind of looks like that shitty virtue that convicted me of immoral sexual acts!”

“How similar is he?! Do you think that's him?!”

“How should I know??? All humans look kind of the same!” Edon said. It has not stopped jerking off at any point throughout this conversation. “Who the fuck even are you?”

“I'm Ezekiel, I'm Isaiah's.. friend, I guess. Look, it's not important! Stop jerking off and tell me what you mean by ‘convicted’!”

“FUCK YOU!” it yelled. Ezekiel sighed.

“Look, okay, I can give you a handjob, how about that?”

“A handjob isn't any different than what I'm already doing now!” Edon growled. “How many times do I have to explain!!!”

“Well I'm not fucking you without a condom RIGHT NOW!”

“IF THERE'S A BARRIER, IT DOESN'T COUNT!” Aethriel was pretty sure that came from both bathroom stalls.

“What do you… want me… to tell Isaiah?” Aethriel asked, leaning against the wall for support.

“...We’ll talk to him together. Help me lift this asshole.” He said. Aethriel held its arms while Ezekiel pulled its pants back up and zipped them, and they both hauled it to its feet. Sensing that it was probably about to try and punch this guy, Aethriel held Edon’s hands behind its back, to its great displeasure.

The three beings left one bathroom stall and went directly to the one nextdoor. Isaiah let them in. Tahir was having a bit of a crisis, sitting on the bathroom floor, pants still halfway off, still hard, crying into his hands. How could he have stumbled so easily?! How could he have given into lust so quickly?!

“Did you fuck that guy??” Ezekiel asked immediately.

“I mean I gave him half a blowjob-”

“YOU!!!!” Edon shouted, trying to point at Tahir, struggling against Aethriel’s grip, which was faltering due to how drunk it still was. “IT IS YOU!!!”

“W-what???” Tahir asked through its tears

“This guy is a fucking Virtue. He's like an angel cop, or whatever. He's running a fucking sting, Isaiah!” Ezekiel said.

“The fuck is a Virtue??” Isaiah said. “This dude’s not an angel, he's a priest.”

“You told me a fake name?!” Tahir wanted to hit himself; it was so fucking obvious now! This was Isaiah, this was the fucking guy all along??? “Where is the amulet?!”

“What amulet??”

“The demonic one that you used to CORRUPT me!” He said, accusatorily. “I cannot BELIEVE a human could be so EVIL! You used your dark magic to manipulate me into immoral sexual acts!!”

“I don't have- who the fuck told you I have a magic amulet?? Where the fuck would I have gotten that from? What the fuck is going on?”

“There is no amulet???” It said, horrified. If there was no amulet, that means…

“What part of ‘why the fuck would I have a demonic amulet’ do you not understand?? Also I want to go on record and say that you literally said the words ‘you’re going to put my dick in your mouth and you’re going to like it’ unprompted, so, I didn’t corrupt you, you ASKED for a blowjob! I’ve definitely intentionally seduced angels, but you aren’t one of them!”

“Let go of me!” Edon said, struggling in Aethriel’s grasp. “I am going to KILL that fucking swine! EYE FOR AN EYE, BITCH!” It elbowed Aethriel in the face, causing it to accidentally lose its grip. Ezekiel held the line, catching its fist before it connected and twisting its arm around enough to hurt.

“Hey! That was not nice!” Aethriel said, holding its eye. “Why are you so angry??” It began to cry.

“LET ME GO!”

“I… I had sex with a human. Intentionally. Willingly. I specifically requested sexual acts be performed with me. I demanded it,” Tahir said out loud. “Oh shit. Oh my God. I am going to Hell. He will tear my wings off. He will snap my halo like a fucking twig!”

“Okay, too many things are happening here at once!” Ezekiel said. “Everyone stop having a crisis and help the only competent one figure out what to do with the Virtue! Do any of you know how to like, subdue or bind an angel so he can’t go anywhere?”

“Believe me, I’ve fucking tried,” Isaiah said. “Ratchet straps or rope imbued with wine from my Altar to another God was the only thing that lasted more than an hour.”

“And it burned so sweetly, too…” Aethriel reminisced, almost forgetting how sad it was about Edon hitting it.

“Okay, well, can we try pouring alcohol down his throat???” Ezekiel asked, “That seems to have worked on your Seraph, and I really don’t have any other ideas.” He was desperately trying to hold onto Edon, who was flailing around still. He was sure that if it wasn’t tipsy, it would have been easily able to get out of his grasp. Tahir looked up with fear in his eyes at that statement, and with even more fear as Ezekiel lost his grip. Edon pounced on the little twink, holding him down and punching him in the head and chest repeatedly. Both of them were still obviously hard. Ezekiel just watched at that point, aware of the futility of trying to get two angels off each other.

“That seems a little fucked up.” Isaiah said.

“Well, he’s going to go back to heaven and get us all fucking killed if we don’t-” There was a blinding flash of light, and all of a sudden, Tahir was gone. Evidently he'd panicked in the heat of the moment and decided risking punishment in heaven was better than getting beat up in a gay bar bathroom. “...Fuck!”

“Well fucking NOW what?!” Isaiah said. “Why are you all looking at me?!”

“You should have known he was a fucking angel!!” Ezekiel argued, stepping around a now exhausted and tearful Edon. “It was so obvious!”

“To YOU! You’ve got like, gaydar but for divine beings! I’m just some guy!”

“Yeah, some guy that fucks divine beings!” Ezekiel said. “And now you got me mixed up in all this!”

“You inserted yourself into this!”

“Well EXCUSE ME for trying to save your life!”

“How about we all just go back to the bar-” Aethriel offered.

“NO!” Isaiah cut it off. “You do NOT need another drink. I… I wanna fucking go home. How about we all just get up and go the fuck to my place and figure this shit out and fucking sober up. How about that.” Isaiah suggested.

“I’m fine with that.” Ezekiel replied. “Edon?”

“... whatever… I do not care!” It grumbled. “...when we get home, can I please -”

“No, no you cannot. We're gonna have a talk about this. That shit you pulled was too much, you can’t be demanding raw sex from strangers.” It looked down at its feet, shame washing over it. It really didn’t understand human social norms at all. “Aethriel, baby,” Isaiah said, looking up at the blonde. “You think you can carry three of us? I don’t trust Edon to fly back to our place.”

“I. I think I can carry all three, yes,” It said, “But it is not going to be a pleasant flight.”

“What, so it is not too drunk to fly, but you think it is too drunk to have sex with me?!”

“I don’ evenn… WANT to have sex with you!” Aethriel said. “You hit me!”

“You were in the way!”

“I was protecting you!”

“I don't need protection!!!!”

“You've made that VERY clear, Edon. Now shut the fuck up, let's get out of here.” They left the bathroom stall and tried to make a casual exit after that fucking fiasco. Luckily the place was pretty loud and crowded and there were probably weirder things going on in the bathrooms here.

“Come on, please,” Aethriel begged as they walked past the bar, “Just one more…?”

“Aethriel, you told me you stopped counting after ELEVEN drinks. You do not need more.” Ezekiel said.

“Maybe I miscounted!” It said. “And I am… more sober now than I was when I was throwing up.”

“You need to drink water and you need to take a shower or bath or something, and then we're gonna go to bed. Okay?” Isaiah said.

“....fine.” it acquiesced.

The four beings entered the dark parking lot. It was the height of the night, maybe the very beginning of the winding down, and there were a ton of cars in the parking lot. The plan was to go into the woods to cover Aethriel while it changed forms, but they had to go through the parking lot to do it. Edon and Ezekiel had to go back to the bar because Ezekiel forgot to close his tab and needed his card back, and Ezekiel wanted to “talk” to Edon privately anyway. Isaiah and the Seraph had to stop once because Aethriel threw up again, which was not a great omen for how well this flight was going to go.

“I feel so uncomfortable…” Aethriel said while they waited. “Edon was correct, this human form is so limited…”

“What specifically feels uncomfortable?” Isaiah asked.

“My stomach hurts… I feel so tired… My head is spinning…”

“Okay, well, those things are all because you had like eleven drinks.” Isaiah teased, picking leaves out of its hair. “I think you aren't giving the human form a fair shot. If I had eleven shots I'd be in the hospital or dead right now.”

“In my real body, eleven drinks would have gotten me comfortably drunk…” it complained.

“Did you get drunk a lot in heaven?”

“Oh, every time I had the chance!” It said, leaning back against a tree. “I would hang around breweries every time I was sent to Earth for anything. There is an entire underground market for wine especially.”

Edon and Ezekiel eventually came back. Edon looked a lot less pissed off after whatever their “talk” had been about. Aethriel felt a little better after getting some time to rest and taking off its clothes.

“Ready to fly?” Isaiah asked.

“I believe so,” It responded, “Let me try and change forms again…” There was a flash of light, and where Aethriel the human had been just a moment ago sat Aethriel the Seraph. “Ohhh, fuck… I thought I would feel less drunk in this body…” It moaned. “This… this is scarcely any better…”

“I am so fucking good.” Ezekiel said, amazed at the transformation. “I fucking knew it. I knew it. I looked at you and I was like, that bitch is a Seraph. Uh… where's the… rest of you?”

“Oh, oh, really, we are going there?” Aethriel said, struggling to stand up. “I am not one of your fancy, all for show Seraphim, your beautiful and radiant upper heavens type…”

“No, no it's not a bad thing! I just. I thought you'd have like. More components…?”

“I am- well, okay, I guess I WAS a very low status Seraph, okay?! I ran a lot of errands, I stood in attendance at the very lowest level… I was not made for beautiful fucking prophetic visions. I apologize for being detestable to your eyes!” It retorted.

“No, no, I - okay, I'm just a little confused, see? I've never seen a Seraph before. I just thought. Y'know. One pair covers the face. One the legs. One to fly.”
“And what do you think I would look like I were doing if I were to take off and spread all six wings at once?” It responded. “Sorry I do not have a prettier fucking FACE. Like a goddamn fucking ARCHANGEL, is that what you humans want, is that the beauty standard I am supposed to reach?? Most of us are all wing!!!”

“Okay, I think you're overreacting a little bit, Aethriel. Ezekiel’s apparently never seen a seraph before. You're pretty drunk. You're very beautiful. We all love you.” Isaiah reassured it as it began crying again.

Eventually they were able to calm Aethriel down, and Ezekiel apologized as he really didn't know that was rude of him to say.

The flight was terrible. Aethriel got lost as shit and took them to another state by accident before having to turn around and fly back the other direction to get back to Isaiah’s place. All in all the journey only took about thirty minutes, but the two humans on board were pretty sure they were gonna die the entire time.

“Is your car still at the bar?” Isaiah asked as they dismounted.

“Yeah but, I parked it somewhere nobody's gonna see.” He reassured Isaiah. “Um, thanks for having me over.”

“No problem. Can you please distract Edon while I get Aethriel showered?”

“I thought you'd never ask. I uh. We had a talk.” He said.

“I see.” He said, amused. “Be aware, that fucker knots.”

“I'm not hearing any negatives.” Ezekiel said. They fistbumped.

“Just tell it to tone it down in public, okay? You gotta explain to it that with us it’s a different story but humans in public don’t need to hear the ‘please please let me cum in you unprotected’ sob story.”

“I will, I will.” Ezekiel said, waving his hand at Isaiah and going over to grab Edon’s arm and lead it indoors.

Isaiah led Aethriel to the shower.

“Okay, turn back into a human for a second, let's get you clean.” He instructed. The angel felt so fucking tired and dizzy and sick and it just wanted to sleep.

“Uughhh… okay…” it said, transforming and falling to the floor. Isaiah helped it back up. He'd already turned the water on the hottest setting. He helped it steady itself and step into the water, and then closed the curtain. “Nooo!!” Aethriel begged, “please do not leave me here alone…”

“I'll stay in the bathroom, okay?” Isaiah reassured it.

“Okay…” It replied. “Do you think I am ugly?”

“No!” Isaiah reassured it. “And neither does Ezekiel. He’s just a little confused. Humans really don’t know very much about what angels look like, and it seems like the reason for that is partly because they look like a ton of different things, anything from a Seraph like you to basically just a human with wings.”

“Would I be prettier with a human face?” It asked, just standing in the water.

“NO. God no.” Isaiah said. “I honestly don’t know how that would work.”

“Some of the higher ranking Seraphim have beautiful faces… you would want nothing to do with me if you saw one of them.” It said, sounding very drunk and sorrowful. “I can only hope the Lord does not send another to try and stop you…”

“Aethriel, I like you how you are. I think you’re beautiful. And I’m not going to ditch you randomly. Are you actually washing off in there? You have to use soap.” He explained.

“Right, right… sorry…” It said, and Isaiah heard it drop the bottle of 5-in-1 soap he had in there.

“I really do feel like we work well together. I’m glad I met you. And you are legitimately the person I am closest to in the entire world.” He said. Aethriel made a little noise.

“I love you.” It said, softly.

“I love you too.” The shower turned off, and Aethriel pulled back the curtain. It looked like it had actually showered, in fact. “I hope you know I only had you change forms because-”

“Because I would not fit in there in my real body. I know.” It replied. “Do you want to make out?” It asked.

“I think you’re a little too drunk.” Isaiah said.

“Just a kiss. No further.” It pleaded.

“Okay, but, seriously, just a kiss. I fucking fell for that one already tonight.” He explained. “You angels are fucking persistent.” They shared a fairly tame kiss. Aethriel only tried to put its tongue in his mouth once.

“I am ready to go to sleep.” It announced. Isaiah gave it a towel and helped it dry off. Once it was dry, it transformed once more, and Isaiah covered it in a blanket he had in storage. They walked past Edon and Ezekiel who were doing God knows what on the couch, neither Isaiah nor Aethriel cared at this point.

“Cmon, let’s go to bed.” He said, leading it to the bedroom. It flopped down on the mattress in a tangle of feathers and wings. “Do you want me to rub your back?”

“Yes please.” It responded. He did so, gently petting the feathers on its head and back until its contented purrs faded out into unconsciousness.

Chapter Text

“Listen, I’m sorry.” Ezekiel said as they walked back to the bar. “I shouldn’t have said that I’m not going to fuck you without a condom. I just didn’t want to do it right there, right then, because of the whole crisis situation going on.”

“Why the fuck are YOU apologizing?!” It asked. It was feeling very embarrassed about earlier, but the emotions and the feelings were just welling up inside it and it did not know how to handle that. “I am the one acting…fucked up! I lost control, I should not have yelled at you or said those horrible things, to anyone!”

“Yeah, well, I can clearly tell this is your first day on Earth. I don’t expect you to totally understand social rules yet.” He said. “...Also, uh. I do want you to fuck me raw. If you’re still down for that, of course.” He said, poking his fingers together.

“Wait. Seriously?” Edon asked. Its cock twitched in its pants and it almost stopped short. “Please do not joke about that. I… things are strange… I think I am experiencing my first mating cycle and I do not appreciate the teasing…” It crossed its arms.

“I’m not joking. I was a little freaked out at first when you grabbed me by the shirt and pulled me into that stall, but like. I’ve come around to the idea.” He explained. “I’m no stranger to fucking without a condom and I think you’re really gonna like that I’m sterile.”

“H-hey. That is not funny!” Edon said. “Y-you’re really…. sterile?”

“It’s not supposed to be funny, and yeah I am.” He said. “What kind of angel are you, anyway?” He asked, trying to get a better idea of what he'd be working with here.

“... I am a Throne.” It said. It hoped that wasn’t going to be a turn off.

“Ohhh, perfect. I’ve seen a Throne before.” He said. “You must be fucking gorgeous. How many wheels do you have?”

“J-just two…” It said, “Hey. I really hope this is not a joke. I. This mating cycle thing. It is not pleasant,” It reiterated. “I feel so out of control. I . I am scared I will hurt you. I am scared I will lose control of myself. I've already been so. Irritable. So rude. So. Shitty.”

“See, uh. That’s the thing,” Ezekiel said, “I’m okay if you lose control. I kind of want you to lose control. Just… let yourself do what you need to do.” He was doing the fingers thing again. “Consider it my penance for denying you earlier.”

“I… okay. I. Um.” Edon was trying very hard to maintain control of its mortal form. Static crackled around the edges of his body. “Let us get back to Isaiah's place quickly…”

Back at the house, Edon struggled to maintain its human appearance until they were indoors. It had kept silent for the entire flight, trying to just breathe, trying not to think about how fucking soft and tight and warm human pussy was, trying not to think about knotting Ezekiel. Oh how it wanted to. It could almost taste the sweet copper of human pussy on its tongue.

As soon as Isaiah and Aethriel were out of the way, Ezekiel made his first mistake.

“Wow. Just wow. You are fucking beautiful.” He said, watching as Edon popped back into normal existence. “I’m so excited to take you for a ride, haha.”

“No.” It said. “No riding. I am in control here. You cannot just tease me like that and expect to stay in control!”

“Hey, that’s good too.” Ezekiel said, opening Isaiah's fridge without any kind of permission and popping open a bottle of wine he had saved. He bent over seductively on purpose, taking way too long to stand back up. Edon closed its eyes, its final act of self denial before it wasn’t going to be able to anymore. Strike one.

“I need to know now,” Edon said, fists manifesting just to clench around it in a radial pattern, “Are you serious about… what you said before?”

“Yes.” Ezekiel said, tipping the wine bottle back. He’d only had like two drinks and wanted to be a little more drunk for this, feeling like his drinks had worn off. Edon looked on with jealousy, its buzz wearing off much quicker than it had hoped. It was barely even tipsy. “I want you to lose your fucking mind, rip my clothes off my body and fuck me until you’re sated.” Divine flame flared in its center as its dick had no choice but to pop out, writhing in the cool air and dripping precum onto Isaiah’s carpet. Ezekiel bit his lip and stared.

“I…I am going to knot you.” It said, trying to warn him. “I cannot promise you I’ll be able to stop it, even though I will try to. The tie could last hours. There is a… lot… of ejaculate. I am just warning you now. Please. If you do not want this, leave now.” Ezekiel approached the Throne, backing it up against the arm of the couch. Strike two.

“Oh, I know. Isaiah told me.” He said.

“He told you?! Told you what part?!” It exclaimed.

“He was like, ‘It’s gonna fucking knot you.’ And I was like, ‘say less.’ You BETTER fucking knot me. There better be a lot in there.” Ezekiel traced a finger up its shaft. Edon’s general expression became one of pure want. That was it, strike three.

“…!” Edon grabbed Ezekiel’s shoulders and flipped their positions, shoving him ass-first into the arm of the couch. It spun him around, grabbed his waist and shoved his chest down. Ezekiel couldn’t see it, but it was rapidly spinning and shifting its wheels to get its dick closer to his pussy. He voluntarily held his own arms behind his back, holding them together to create a nice handle for the angel if it wanted to use that. Instead, it grabbed the waist of his jeans and tore them seam from seam, not even bothering to get them any more off than at his knees before shoving a tongue between his thighs to get a taste of the pussy it was about to wreck. He was wet. Very wet. It probably didn’t even have to add any saliva as lube. “Fuck. You are so wet... Oh, fuck, you have no idea what you’ve done,” Edon said, cock resting on the top of his ass. “Ego sum iens ut te gravidam…!”

“Perge et fac,” Ezekiel shot back, really glad now that he hadn’t listened to the guys that told him not to take Latin as a language in highschool. It pressed him harder into the cushions, and took its tongue away from his pussy not even milliseconds before shoving the head of its cock into him. It grabbed the handle he’d made with his arms and used it as leverage to shove itself in further. “AaaH!” Edon was on the larger side by human standards (but as previously stated, definitely not by Throne standards,) but Ezekiel felt the girth really wasn't too bad, it was the length that was the issue, prehensile tentacle dick and all. Taking this thing's knot, though... he had no idea how that was gonna go. Isaiah hadn't been too specific.

“Is it all the way in already?!” Edon asked, bottoming out at the seven inch mark. Bumping against his cervix was making it drool. “Please, please try to relax, just… please, can you take a little more…?” Ezekiel’s muscles tightened involuntarily at that sexy fucking question, just getting the Throne more desperate to stuff him fuller. It had a few more inches, and it wanted them inside him, no matter how unrealistic that was even by throne standards. Thrones faced somewhat of a geometric challenge when they mated; those with the ability to ejaculate had a few extra inches behind the knot just for positioning purposes. But there’s no universal sex ed in heaven, so. Edon didn’t know that.

“I… give me a second…” Ezekiel responded, trying his best to relax. It needily pressed deeper, another half inch. “Okay, um, maybe we should try another position? I think if I were on my back, with my legs up…?”

It grabbed him and held him up by his thighs as if he weighed nothing, spun him around on its dick like a toy, and rotated only slightly around the couch, the minimum distance needed to travel to press him back into it so that his back was on the seat cushions. It held his legs up and out of the way, getting as close to a mating press as a Throne would have been able to. 

“Fuuuck,” It moaned, “good enough…”

“Good ENOUGH?!” Ezekiel complained, “What else do you want from me?! I’m like 5’2!”

“Tace! Shut your mouth!” It demanded, frantically. It used two hands to continue holding Ezekiel’s legs out of the way, and another two to hold his hips in place while it thrusted. It was NOT being gentle anymore, not that it had started out much gentler, and Ezekiel was very turned on by how little it seemed to be able to control itself (and how little control HE had.) Edon was very easily able to access his A-spot, hitting the very back of him with each thrust, which was something Ezekiel hadn’t even known would feel that good. He’d never really cum from penetration before, but… hey. Maybe all it would take was a little divine intervention?

Sexual fluids were getting all over Isaiah’s couch cushions, and Ezekiel was vaguely concerned that Isaiah would be pissed tomorrow, but not nearly concerned enough to do anything about it. He actually kind of wanted to make a huge fucking mess. Getting his bearings, he gently squeezed his muscles around Edon’s dick just to be a tease. It dug its nails into his hips, pressing as deep into him as it could.

“D-do not fucking put me to the test,” It demanded, “Oh, ohh, you have no idea, you do not understand…”

“I just want it to feel good for you,” Ezekiel said, doing it again. It pulled his body closer to it, pulling him up onto his shoulders and positioning itself so it was essentially fucking him straight down into the couch. It was holding him up with enough strength that he was pretty much dangling upside down, not needing to support almost any of his own weight.

“You are s-so. Fucking. Tight. I am going to WRECK you if I knot you…!” It said, “Yet you continue to be a little fucking tease, forcing my hand!” The door to the bathroom opened with a click, and Aethriel and Isaiah exited. They looked sleepy and content together. Isaiah glanced briefly in Ezekiel's direction, rolling his eyes and smiling. Ezekiel gave him a thumbs up.

“Please wreck me!” He said, loud enough to purposefully catch Isaiah’s attention. “Come on, precor, quaeso me gravidam!”

That was maybe a little too much, Ezekiel immediately thought, as the Throne growled at him, adjusting its grip on his thighs.

“You are SUCH a fucking WHORE!” It growled. “Noli tentare, me faciam!”

“VOLO tu facere!” He cried, and that was strike four.

“Stultus meretrix-!” It exclaimed, tears in its eyes, unable to stop itself now, “Rogasti pro eo!!!”

Edon pushed him down onto its shaft one more time, popping its knot past his tight entrance in one motion and tying him there, as deep as it could get. It slammed his A spot with its tip, and its knot popped in right against his g spot, and his pussy felt like it took a fucking screenshot or something as he came with the angel. Pulse after pulse of hot cum spilled eagerly into his waiting womb while Edon held him up with very shaky astral hands. They really were a perfect fit, Edon fit inside him pretty much perfectly, like a key in a lock.

“Fuck!!” Fuck fuck fuck, oh, fuck…” Ezekiel swore, pussy twitching and squeezing around Edon’s cock as his orgasm rocked him. This only increased the Throne's enthusiasm, gripping his hips tighter and muttering something that sounded like a curse.

The tie was not nearly as perfect this time as it was with Isaiah the first time; in its desperation it had knotted him a little off center, and a very small stream of ejaculate was able to slip out past the knot. For some reason, sensing this and feeling the wetness against Ezekiel’s ass pissed Edon off something TERRIBLE. ALL its cum needed to be in him. All of it. It knew this, it knew nothing more. It readjusted, shoving its knot harder against his g spot, but managing to create a more perfect seal.

“You have to t-take it all…” It demanded, still gently rocking against Ezekiel’s hips despite being unable now to pull out or push in. “Please please please-!”

“Fuck yes,” Ezekiel replied, “Fuck…. Ohhh my god…” He was coming down much faster than Edon. After a little while, the strong pulses of cum ebbed off into little spurts…if you could call what was probably double the amount that an average human could produce in one orgasm as a “little.” That knot wasn't going ANYWHERE soon.

“I… I fucking… I fucking warned you...” Edon said between breaths.

“I-I don't know if my body has space for any more,” Ezekiel responded. “A-are you still cumming?!” Suffice to say, Ezekiel wasn't totally grasping what Edon had warned him about.

“YES.” It replied, barely able to keep its focus enough to do so. His pussy was still gently squeezing around it as his little body tried to adjust to the fairly large insertion that was still there post orgasm, and it was driving it fucking insane. The emotions it was feeling simply didn't compute at this point; it was so fucking horny. So frustrated, both sexually and with Ezekiel’s whole “I can't take more cum” deal. Only partially relieved. Pissed off as fuck. The ebbing flow of cum was not helping; it was very well aware how much more than that it had to give, and it cursed its body for portioning it out like this for whatever reason. It needed to cum again and it hadn’t even really finished cumming the first time. “fuck... your CUNT…” It whined, as the spurts ebbed even further back into just trickles, and then finally turned to just dry twitching.

“I hope that felt good,” Ezekiel replied. Edon wasn't listening and had not stopped moving, still trying to thrust, like that one orgasm wasn't even close to enough. It was meeting a good amount of resistance because of its knot; that thing wasn't moving, and the frustration from not being able to thrust was mounting. It whimpered and keened and tried a little harder to pull its knot out just a little, to no avail. All that it managed to do was have Ezekiel scream,

“DESINE!!!” as it practically pulled him off the couch trying to get it out. “DESINE!! That fucking hurts! Stop!” Edon stopped when it heard that, but not without complaint.

“B-but-!”

“No!! No but! It hurts really bad when you do that. It isn't going to come out, you're going to have to wait.”

“Wait?!” It replied, with desperation in its voice, “I… okay….” It trailed off. It tried its best to wait. Holding completely still was too much for the angel, though, and so it continued to rock gently against Ezekiel in the desperate hope that its knot would dislodge just a little so it could cum at least just one more time!!! In about ten minutes, Edon was able to give Ezekiel another two orgasms from all that rocking directly against his g spot, and slide its knot out. A rush of silvery white cum mixed with... was that... was that blood? “Fuck…” it commented, looking at the blood-tinged liquid. “I think… um… I think I hurt you.”

“What? Why?” Ezekiel asked, and Edon shamefully dipped a finger into the mess and held it up for Ezekiel to see. At first, he thought maybe it actually was because he tore, since his pussy did feel sore and also on top of that it had hurt pretty bad when Edon tried to pull the knot out like that. But the amount of blood was definitely… more than that, and it didn't really look like blood from a new wound. “Oh, shit.”

“Are you in pain?!?! What do I do??!” Edon asked, freaking out a little bit.

“No, no, it's- you didn't do that.” He explained. “That's. Um. I would be bleeding anyway. That's period blood. Damn it. Fuck. I'm sorry. Uh, if it freaks you out we can stop.”

“No, I just- I thought I injured you!” Edon replied. “...Can we please keep going?”

“As long as you're okay with it.” Ezekiel said, covering his face. “This… seriously, I'm sorry, I need to keep better track of these things.”

“I truly give no fucks about the blood, human, as long as I did not cause you injury.” It replied, a little annoyed. “You are a wet, warm, willing place for me to cum and those are in critically short supply, I would not throw you out of my bed for bleeding.”

“Thanks,” Ezekiel said, sarcastically. 

They went for two more rounds. The second round really helped calm the fucking IRRITABILITY Edon had been experiencing; getting to cum the second time, feeling its knot slip in and lock against his pubic bone, feeling his pussy cum hard around it while it was pumping him full and hearing him moan and beg for it really helped it feel less pissed off. That and getting to appreciate how his hips and ass felt under its hands now that it had a slightly clearer head. Ezekiel was FUN to touch, it found, and it maxed out the amount of hands it could summon to touch him in as many places as it could. The human very much enjoyed this.

Edon had begged Ezekiel for the third round after the second failed to completely sate it; he couldn't say no to that many puppy dog eyes. The third round was much softer and sweeter; less aggressive thrusting, for one, and Edon decided to encourage Ezekiel and give him a lot of soft (yet largely incomprehensible, word salad Latin) praise for taking all of this and doing such a good job once it realized just how MUCH this probably was for the human. It ended with Ezekiel falling half asleep on top of the angel, on the couch, knot #3 tightly tied inside him, at like 3 in the fucking morning.

By the time it was able to finally slip out of him, the haze of rut over its eyes was beginning to fade (for now.) It surveyed the damage; there was a lot of cum, and it had gotten fucking everywhere. The couch cushions, the carpet, all over the human’s body, in his hair, everywhere. And that wasn't mentioning the blood. Still worried, Edon gently spread the human’s pussy apart to try and see if it had tore him. It was kind of obscured by just the amount of fluids that were down there, and Edon made the executive decision to clean him up a little bit with its tongue. Ezekiel moaned softly, eyes half open, and made no move to stop the angel, who was desperately trying to ignore the THINGS the taste of human blood was doing to it.

Shit. Shit, oh, God, the Throne thought, seeing that it HAD torn his pussy a little bit. It wasn't nearly as bad as the quantity of blood had suggested, but, that was definitely a tear.

“... Ezekiel?” It said, shaking him to get him to come back into full consciousness.

“Mhm?? Whathappend?” He said, exhausted.

“I… um… you need to see this…” it said, picking him up and taking him to the bathroom. It expertly folded its wheels to fit through the door, and lifted him up to the bathroom counter so he could view the damage for himself.

“Oh, fuck.” He said, spreading himself open to survey the damage. It was only a first degree tear, but it definitely tore his skin a little bit, near the area where his hymen had been years ago. “Fuck. That is so fucking hot.”

“Hot?! Are we looking at the same thing here?!” Edon exclaimed, “I, I lost control, I hurt you badly, you are bleeding!”

“Most of that is period blood. The tear is nothing, it's like barely half a centimeter, it'll heal!” He said. “I've had worse from human partners. Next time-”

“There will not be a next time!!!” Edon said, panicking, “I need to return to heaven, I'm going to confess and turn myself in!”

“Please don't do that, stop freaking out!” Ezekiel commanded. “Look, I'm really sleepy, and I have an idea on how you can repay me, how about that?” Edon looked open to the idea. “Okay. How about you help me get cleaned up,and then we find a good place to sleep?”

“...That… um… okay…” Edon said, still mortified.

“You can start by making it feel better. Do you angels have like, healing abilities or anything like that? He asked.

“...Yes, but… it is not very .. reliable without an order from the Most High,” Edon explained. “And I could not heal a wound caused by holy means, among other restrictions….”

“How does it work, exactly?” Ezekiel asked.

“You are going to be upset,” Edon turned away a little bit. “...The easiest method may just involve saliva for minor things, like… flesh wounds… minor blindness… that sort of thing…” Ezekiel scooted to the edge of the counter and spread his legs.

“Why don't you get to work?’ He teased, spreading his pussy open. He was still a total mess down there: angel cum, human vaginal fluids, blood… How was Edon supposed to resist when he CLEARLY needed to be cleaned up?! When its tongue would do the best job?! “I think your mouth down there would be really soothing…”

“B-but it was caused by holy means!” Edon explained, “I cannot heal something like that.”

“Does trying to pull your knot out too aggressively count as ‘holy means’?” Ezekiel asked.

“Um, I think so??” Edon said.

“The theological implications of that are just-” He stopped himself, sighing. “C'mon. I can see you fucking drooling, I know you want to clean up the mess you made.” He commented. Edon couldn't help but get a little closer.

“If this does not work, you cannot blame me.” Edon said, before trying its best to focus on actually cleaning him up, not just getting invested in eating him out. Its tongue darted through and explored his soft folds, removing the general debris from their activities with fervor. The cum, it could handle, even though being told to eat its own cum out of his pussy was a kink it would definitely be exploring later. The blood on the other hand was making it question whether or not Ezekiel would be down to take another load after this despite everything. The suppression of its rut that it gained from the three orgasms it just had was threatening to wear off as it continued to go down on him, forgetting that it was supposed to be focused on a task here.

“Are you okay down there?” Ezekiel finally asked, as Edon started trying to shove its tongue inside him. “I, um, I think you did it, I think I'm healed. It doesn't hurt anymore.” He declared. Edon pulled itself away from him to see how it had done: it could no longer see the tear, and he did look significantly less covered in blood and cum. Mission accomplished.

“...Can I please keep going anyway?” It asked.

“...Look, I hate to do this to you,” Ezekiel replied, “But I am really, really tired and I've already cum like eight times. I think I just wanna go to sleep. Is that okay?”

“Can I sleep next to you?” The Throne asked, nervously.

“As long as you promise to behave yourself, I'd love that.”

+++ Meanwhile, in Heaven +++

Tahir arrived back in Heaven an absolute wreck. It was shaking with anxiety. How long would it take for God to find out? What about the Cherubim who were his superiors? The Council??? He headed straight for the Archives to try and search for some information on what the fuck to do now.
He spent hours pacing the halls, reading book after book, trying to figure SOMETHING out. None of these books had answers. He was becoming desperate. I may just have to make an appointment with the Cherubim and own up to this misstep, and hope to the Lord they show me mercy… he thought. Maybe since I am repentant, the Council will be more lenient…? But he knew in his heart of hearts they would not be. He had firsthand experience on the opposite end of that. And this was a major infraction!

So consumed by the prospect of punishment, Tahir didn’t notice that the Cherub who had given him his quest to begin with was right around the corner. They collided as he rounded it, which knocked little Tahir to the ground.

“Ah, back already?” The Cherub joked, honestly assuming the Virtue hadn’t even left heaven yet. “What have you learned? Did you find that human? Was I correct about the amulet?”

“AH! Arseni, your grace, you frightened me, I, oh… I… I learned… oh…” He started, “The human, yes…” He could not bring himself to look the Cherub in the eyes.
“Hey, it is alright if you have not left yet. It has only been three days. You have at least three more.” It reassured him. He did not at all look reassured. In fact, tears formed in his eyes, and he was very clearly holding back sobs. “Are you alright, Tahir?” It asked.

“Y-yes… your grace…” He responded.

“How about you step into my office? Let’s have a talk.” It said. OH, no, this was awful! This was the last thing he wanted! But there was no way he could get out of it now. He lowered his head, and accompanied Arseni to its office on the floor above. Arseni motioned for Tahir to enter before it, and it closed the door behind them both. Tahir hadn’t remembered how fucking hot it was in this goddamn office. He wasn’t sure if he was sweating from the heat or from the fear. “What is bothering you so?”

“...It is nothing, truly!” Tahir reassured it, trying to fight the tears.

“Is this about the mission I gave you?” It asked. Tahir slowly nodded his head. “Did you go to Earth yet?” He nodded again. “...What happened on Earth that upset you so?” Tahir took a deep breath. It really wasn’t going to have a choice. Maybe confessing now would be better… maybe he was wrong, maybe the Council would have mercy on him.

“The… location…” He began. “It was so much worse than I expected. The sin, lecherous. Lust, adultery, coveting behavior, it was pervasive. And I did not fit in at all! The humans all looked so different than I, and most had no interest in speaking with me at all!” He took a deep breath. “I was looking around for the human you mentioned, the transsexual with the supposed amulet, and I could not find her at first.” Arseni perked up at the words ‘at first.’ So he’d found this guy? “I stood outside the last place I had not checked, a dark room where I knew there would be so much premarital sex it turned my stomach… but I was approached by a human who I…. I believed had pity on me. He offered me support and offered to even aid in my quest. Without much other option I agreed.” Tahir paused, beginning to lose its grip, tears streaming down its face.

“Did the human… take advantage of you?” Arseni questioned.

“NO! And that is the PROBLEM!” Tahir exclaimed. “Your grace, please, have mercy on me…!” It sobbed.

“What happened?!”

“H-he… offered to help… and I became so aroused… we kissed… he offered me oral s-sex… I agreed…”

“You sucked his dick?!” Arseni asked, shocked that the Virtue would do such a thing with how innocent it had been acting in its office just a few days ago. Fuck, if you were going to put out, could it have at least been for me?!

“...Other way around.” Tahir confessed. “I even demanded that he do it after he explained to me that it was sex, and that a c-condom would not make a difference! I lusted, your grace, I sinned. The human found me before I found her, and she corrupted me!” The Cherub thought for a moment, hands delicately placed together in thought.

“Well, with that amulet, it could hardly be considered your fault.” It finally said.

“THERE IS NO AMULET!” Tahir exclaimed, bursting into tears yet again. “It is on my head!” Arseni watched as he slammed his head into the desk, collapsing into a little pile while his shoulders heaved. On one hand, he is so vulnerable right now. It thought. On the other hand…

“Tahir.” Arseni said, getting no meaningful response from the distraught Virtue. “Tahir. Listen to me.” No response, just tears. It sighed, sliding its super expensive gold and white thronelike desk chair up right next to Tahir’s normal one. It placed a hand on his shoulder. Tahir froze. “You seem extremely upset. I would like to comfort you. Could you look up at me, please?” It asked. That calm, cool, dominant voice washed over him like cool water. As horribly remorseful as he felt, he still felt heat bloom in his chest and… other places… not knowing what else to do, he made himself look upwards towards the Cherub’s four faces. The lion face had its eyes tightly shut, while the human face speaking to him looked at him with an expression of mild annoyance and some sort of softness Tahir couldn’t place right now. It reached out and gently lifted Tahir’s chin with a finger. “It is alright. Your secret is safe with me.”
“W-what?!” Tahir asked, incredulous. “Y-you are not going to report me?!”
“Of course not.” It reassured him. “There, there. Would you like to come sit with me? My chair is much more comfortable.”
“There is no space for me…” He pointed out. The Cherub spread its legs.
“How about here? In my lap?” It offered.
“I cannot!!” Tahir continued to cry. “I am so disgusting, I am a disgusting pervert, I would corrupt you as well! I would have indecent thoughts!”
“Tahir.” Arseni said, leaning down so that its faces were at Tahir’s face level. “You could not possibly corrupt me.”
“That is what you THINK!” He said, “But I did not believe a human could corrupt me either!! And I must confess, your grace, at the risk of punishment, that I have not had the most chaste feelings about… about you… in the past…” He forced himself to confess. To his horror, Arseni just laughed.
“Oh, Tahir. You misunderstand.” It explained, lifting him gently and setting him on its lap. He allowed this, very much enjoying the strength and power of the Cherub, as much as he tried to deny it. “You would not even be the fiftieth Virtue I have done unchaste things with.” It tilted his chin up yet again, so that he was looking directly up at it, leaning almost backwards. Tahir swallowed. “Take a guess, just a guess, at how many pretty little Virtue Academy new graduates I’ve TAKEN, bent over this desk?” It motioned to its too-large, gold accented desk.
“...One?”
“More like one hundred. And that is only counting those whose domain is Chastity.” The Cherub said. “You and I are not unalike in our desires for carnal pleasures, Tahir, and I think you will find the fornication ‘problem’ is a bit larger than your precious council suspected.”
“...I…cannot believe this. You must be joking.” He replied. Arseni leaned down to give his head a little kiss.
“Would you like to experience it instead?” It asked, tracing up Tahir’s sides. “I know exactly which buttons my pure little Virtues like pressed, and I am a very patient lover.” It teased. “Besides, I have taken a LOT of virginities, and I am particularly eager to take yours.”
“I-I…” He stuttered, eyes beginning to glaze over. He was so tired. He was so relieved that he wasn’t immediately right now getting in trouble with God like he thought he would. The Cherub was so warm behind and under him, its hands were so gentle and practiced. Nothing it had done yet could technically be considered unchaste, technically. This was just. Softness. Gentleness. Comforting touch. It HAD said it knew what buttons Virtues liked pressed…
“It is up to you,” Arseni explained. “Say the word and instead of a fun night, we can both forget all about this. Your sin will not leave my lips regardless, I assure you. I will simply tell the Lord that you were unable to locate the human and leave it at that.” It assured him.
“I… you are certain, no one will ever find out???” Tahir asked, in a quiet voice. It was shaking like a leaf, full of the fear of God and hot, consuming arousal.
“God will not learn anything from me.” It confirmed. It reached down to encircle his hips with its hands, which it did very easily with their massive size difference. It gave him a gentle squeeze, and he made a soft keening sound. That pretty much settled it. That trick ALWAYS gets them going, Arseni thought to itself.
“...Fuck. Um. Okay. Um. Yes,” he said, “Yes, please. I… I cannot deny that I… I ache to be touched.” The Cherub giggled softly behind him, running its fingers through his hair, petting him like a little cat.
“Tell me, little Virtue,” It began, rolling the desk chair back around to its side of the desk. It used an astral hand to lock the office door. “What did you and that sinful human do, exactly?”

“I… I put my phallus in his mouth. I was wearing a condom.” He said, staring at the desk. “He used his tongue to bring me pleasure in that way. It… it was very nice.” He admitted, shamefully.

“Did you cum?” It asked, shifting him backwards in its lap to press its erection between the cheeks of his ass. Tahir’s breath hitched. Oh God, he thought. Everything about Arseni was big.

“N-no… we were… interrupted… just beforehand.” He confessed.

“Did you try anything else sexually, anything at all?” It asked, sounding curious and hopeful. Tahir couldn’t imagine why, and probably wouldn’t have been able to guess that it was because of Arseni’s huge virginity kink. If there was one thing this Cherub loved to do it was pop cherries. Its second favorite thing to do was fuck sluts, but, it was more than aware that Tahir didn’t fit that bill. “Did he put his dick in you, or his fingers?”

“No, no, of course not!!!” Tahir vehemently denied. “I would never let a human p-penetrate me.”

“Did you WANT him to penetrate you?” The Cherub asked, teasingly.

“...Well… I do not believe he… physically could have done so. I do not think… they… had a penis.” He admitted. “But there was… um… There was a man in the dark room. He put his hand down the back of my pants. I… I must admit my thoughts quickly turned to the prospect of penetration… but no penetration occurred, I swear!”

“Oh, you innocent thing,” The Cherub chastised, “It really only would have taken a little bit of touching to get you ready for me? I could have had you days ago.” Arseni began to toy with the closures on Tahir’s robes, almost absentmindedly undoing them, as if it had done this thousands of times. “Well, you aren’t exactly untouched, but, you’re definitely still a fucking virgin. I would not count half of a blowjob as a loss of virginity, anyway. How does that make you feel?” It asked.

“... It feels good to know I did not sin as terribly as I could have.” He admitted. “At least I had SOME self discipline…”

“Good thing you lost that the second you walked into my office,” Arseni commented. “That tends to happen at the threshold of my door… I cannot imagine why.” The robe was cast off onto the floor somewhere. Arseni gently shifted its focus to playing with Tahir’s chest.

“Y-your presence is… not easy to ignore.” Tahir offered. “You are incredibly attractive. Dominant. You exude a certain… energy. I-I walk into this office and the desk looks like it was DESIGNED to be very comfortable to be bent over...” He admitted. “I…I cannot sit here and tell you I have never wanted this prior to today.” It thumbed over his soft nipples and giggled as it watched his cock twitch. “I am just… just now allowing myself to acknowledge it.”

“I appreciate the compliments, and I will definitely be taking that feedback to the wonderful carpenter who designed this desk.” The Cherub commented, amused.

“...Do I even want to know?” Tahir asked.

“Probably not, but from that response you can probably already guess.” Arseni replied, picking the Virtue up again like a doll. It flipped him around so their cocks were touching, and so that Tahir could see what he would be taking.

“O-oh. Wow.” Tahir said, looking down at what Arseni was packing. It was big. Very big. At least three times the length of what he had. And, fuck, it had BARBS, thankfully only around the very base of it, but, still, Jesus Christ! There were smaller, almost velcro like barbs near the top of the area in which it had those structures, and they got bigger as they approached the middle of the area, then got smaller again near the very base. The area which the barbs covered was only about the bottom two inches of its dick. The rest of the shaft was fairly smooth except for a really nice dick vein, and it terminated in a kind of flat, blunt-ish head. It was kind of like the head of a human penis… sort of, but not really, it was way… flatter? Flatter. Yeah, it was flatter than that, almost but not quite equine. It, like Edon (not that Tahir would know what Edon’s dick looked like) had a circumcision scar around the shaft; it had basically zero foreskin left, whoever had done the procedure seemed to have been really thorough and almost taken too much. Its cock emerged from a sheath, which was covered with curly, soft, reddish-orange fur like the rest of the lower half of its body. Beneath this were its balls, also covered with that same fur. Tahir hadn't seen like, THAT many sets of balls in his life, but, compared to his own... he could tell Arseni was significantly above average in that department too. Tahir was no expert but he was not sure this was going to fit, and at the very least it wasn’t going to go in easily. “I… I am…”

“Intimidated?” Arseni mused, “Sweet Virtue, you must trust me. I have my tricks. And I promise you, it will fit, in time. I will make it fit.”

“You could not possibly…” He said. Arseni reached down and grasped both of their shafts together, jerking them both off. The spikes felt rough against Tahir’s dick, and he was not prepared to admit how much this turned him on.

“I am not going to just shove it in you like an animal,” It said, sounding offended. “What did I say about being a patient lover? I am going to thoroughly prepare you first.”

“Enough to take… all of that?!” Tahir protested.

“Oh, darling, you’re ambitious! No, not ALL of it. I couldn’t ask a precious, soft-skinned Virtue to take the spikes.” It explained.

“O-okay… alright…” That eased the poor Virtue’s mind a bit. “I am afraid of it hurting, is all.”

“I will not hurt you.” Arseni assured him, tapping the tip of his cock with its finger and slowly removing it, playing with the little string of precum that came with it. “On the off chance anything does hurt, you need to tell me so that I can take it slower.” It pushed him back and out of its lap, and Tahir struggled to stand upright. His cock was embarrassingly hard, and he stood nakedly in front of the desk, unable to find the confidence to look the Cherub in any of its many eyes. It giggled, spinning him around and gently pressing him into the desk, effectively bending him over it to expose his hole. It spread him apart with its hands (each one big enough to entirely envelope each cheek,) and marveled at how adorably he clenched and wiggled his hips. “Lord, you are pretty! You mean to tell me no living creature has ever had the pleasure of penetrating you?! Not even in the Academy?”

“W-why would- no! Of course not, especially not in the Academy!!” He responded. “The VIRTUE academy, you mean?!”

“You must have been QUITE the square!” Arseni teased. “The LOOPHOLES those damn college students will come up with for something to ‘not count’ as sex would turn your head. Who do you think invented soaking?”

“Oh, GOD!” Tahir buried his head in his hands on the desk while Arseni played with his ass. He uncovered his face, and immediately regretted doing so, realizing he was face to face with the engraved initials of the “carpenter” Arseni was referencing earlier.

“You look fucking DELECTABLE.” The Cherub praised, mouth watering at the sight of his cute little hole. It reached down and began to touch itself, using very practiced motions up and down its shaft. “I was going to save this for later, but, what better way to begin our activities by showing you another thing you missed out on in the Academy?”

“...That depends on what you mean by that,” He said, anxious.

“Remember that one final exam?” Arseni knelt down to get into a position where it would be possible to eat his ass. It breathed gently over his entrance, causing him to shiver.

“You want to t-taste me down there?!” He questioned, shocked. “U-um!!! I!!!” Tahir’s mind flew back to which fucking exam Arseni was talking about, and quickly fell on that one time he’d taken an elective called ‘Ass-To-Mouth, Is It Sexual Immorality? And Other Classification Debates’ in which he had the distinct memory of meeting Arseni for the first time, as the fucking MODERATOR of the debate he’d been a part of as the final fucking exam… “Lord, you still remember that stupid fucking debate?!” He distinctly remembered LOSING that goddamn debate, too, arguing for the ‘it’s always a sin’ side.

“REMEMBER? I masturbate to ‘that fucking debate’ once a fucking WEEK, Tahir, do you even UNDERSTAND how much ass I ate after that trash was over?” It taunted, “I had a Virtue on all four faces at once. It was crazy. I tried to catch you on the way out but you were pretty obviously holding back tears, so, I thought maybe next semester.”

“Why am I not surprised…” Tahir grumbled.

“That is not a yes or a no,” Arseni repeated, “And hey, it has been fifty years, but I am not that strict of a debate moderator. I will let you change your position now.”

“...Yes, please, I would like you to taste me…” He confessed, cheeks heating up in embarrassment as he admitted that. “Why are you making me SAY these things aloud?!”

“Because I like to hear my pretty Virtues beg,” Arseni said, “By the end of this you are going to be saying a lot more than ‘yes please’, believe me.”

“J-just do it already!” Tahir demanded, mortified at how the Cherub giggled before spreading him apart again (with its unoccupied hand and an astral hand) and pressing its soft, warm tongue against his hole. “O-ohhh, FUCK!” At first, it felt strange and shocking, being licked somewhere Tahir had never even been touched in the past. He wiggled in the Cherub’s grip, in a halfhearted attempt to adjust to the sensation. He didn’t need to do much, though, as within a few licks the sensation went from “mildly uncomfortable” to “what the fuck have I been missing out on, oh my God.” He had not expected it to feel that good. It felt invasive, it felt revealing, but if Tahir had been asked if this felt better or the blowjob felt better, he’d choose this a hundred times over. It took approximately ten seconds to get the Virtue of Chastity moaning like a whore.

Arseni was well aware of its skill level. Its tongue covered far more than just his hole, and it made sure to deliberately ignore and avoid his cock and balls while it licked him, circling his entrance and using gentle pressure to get him accustomed to that kind of sensation back there. It started out using gentle, teasing pressure, and quickly graduated to more demanding strokes once it got the feeling that Tahir was going to cry if it didn’t start giving him the real deal.

“You SURE you’ve never done this before?” It asked, “You’re moaning like a little slut over there.”

“S-shut up!!” He demanded, “Shut up, please, please do not stop!” The Cherub giggled, teasing his hole with an astral fingertip.

“I thought you tried to convince me it was a sin!” Arseni asked, feigning shock.

“That was a long time ago!” Tahir argued, “I-I was correct for the time!!!”

“You want to know something?” The Cherub said, switching heads and using its ox head to eat him out while it talked to him, “I went into that debate WANTING to give that win to your team. I thought it would have been much hotter to go down on all those Virtues after they knew I considered it a sin.”

“A-are you still talking about this?!” Tahir asked, grinding his ass back on the Cherub’s face.

“You are not very good at debate, is my point here!” It said, “Correct for the time… get real!”

“I fucking KNOW! You gave me a damn C!”

“And only because you were so cute! I wanted to fail you.”

Arseni ate him out until he WAS actually crying. His vocalizations went from slutty moaning at first, to begging the Cherub to put its tongue inside him, to a string of senseless pleading once the Cherub FINALLY gave in to that request after twenty minutes of “preparing” him. It had not been fucking around when it said that it was patient. “Massive fucking tease” would have been a better descriptor.

“Y-your fingers…!” He begged, “Please, please please please, at least your fingers, I n-need more than just tongue…!” He pleaded. He couldn’t believe the things he was saying. Just an hour ago he was begging for forgiveness for getting part of a blowjob, now he was begging to be fucked by his boss. Angels fall hard, he supposed.
“Hmm… do you think you are ready?” It removed its face from his ass, getting a soft whimper in return.
“YES!” He declared. The Cherub finally rose up from its position and toyed with his rim with a finger. It only had to use a bit of pressure now, and his body accepted the intrusion.
“Wow, you are tight,” It commented. “I will definitely need to use lube with you.” It pulled its finger out, and opened a random drawer in its desk. It moved random papers and shit to the side and pulled out an intricate glass bottle of light pink, clear lube. It uncorked the bottle and poured some of it over his ass. He shivered at how cold it felt in relation to the hot air in this office. “That is much better,” It said, pressing its finger back into him. He bristled at the intrusion, but quickly adjusted to it. It definitely helped that Arseni was basically a prostate wizard at this point and was toying with Tahir’s relentlessly.
“F-ffucK-” He was able to choke out between moans, steadying himself and spreading his legs to allow for more access. Part of him wanted Arseni to focus at least a little attention on his dick and balls, but he was quickly realizing that may be entirely off the table. Even that thought somehow turned him on. His cock leaked precum onto the floor uselessly as the Cherub continued its movements, before adding more lube and then another finger.
“Let me know if I am hurting you,” It said, lovingly stroking his prostate as it allowed him time to adjust to the increased stretch.
His legs were so shaky he could barely hold himself up, and his ability to speak coherently was gradually taken from him over the next ten minutes as Arseni bullied his prostate so expertly it was like this was its full time job. Arseni had really taken its time to prepare him well; the addition of a third finger and just a little adjustment in the stroking of his very sensitive and already teased to the edge prostate sent him reeling. He whimpered softly as he painted the underside of the desk with cum, a little under a tablespoon of the stuff. His legs shook, and he adorably stomped one of them on the ground to try and stabilize himself while the shocks of the orgasm set him off balance.
“I-I’m-!!!!” Was all he managed to say as coherent speech, as Arseni fucked him through his first ever orgasm. “I'm cumming!!!”
“Oh, how cute!” Arseni praised, watching his cock twitch and spurt cum without even being touched, “You really are very receptive to penetration. I do hope you understand that you will be tasked with cleaning all that up, though.” It chastised, motioning to the cum he got under the desk.
“Wait, i-is it all done?” Tahir asked, as Arseni backed off of him, pulling its fingers out. It had actually done that for the purpose of getting a nice view of his ass while he recovered from the orgasm, but that statement gave it other ideas…
“Hmm? Oh, the sex?” The Cherub asked, purposely sounding clueless, standing up behind him to loom over the much smaller angel.
“Y-yeah.” Tahir replied. “Is… um.. were you not going to put your dick… in me?” He asked. Arseni feigned shock.
“Oh, heavens, is that what you want?” It rested its cock between the cheeks of his ass, gently grinding against him. It was so much bigger than he was. “You would like to take all this? I don't know, you were pretty tight around just my fingers…”
“N-no, I can take it!!!” The Virtue reassured it. “I want to try, at least!!! I have been thinking about taking your cock since we started, um…playing… and it is not fair to YOU if only I get to finish!”
“Hmm… or, I could just touch myself in front of you.” It suggested. Tahir whimpered softly.
“No, please!!!” He begged, “I-I mean, that is just TOO much teasing!! You cannot expect me to simply sit there and w-watch, while you are right in front of me-!” He cut himself off out of embarrassment. The Cherub giggled. It had made up its mind. Tahir was a special case: usually it would jump at the opportunity to pound tight virgin Virtue ass, but seeing just how receptive and DESPERATE he was made it think, what if I made him wait? And that idea had just been too sexy not to implement. He already came from me fingering him and had my dick against his. That should be enough to start his little heat cycles right up, if that human blowing him didn’t start it already. If he’s so eager he'd go from goody fucking two shoes Council Member actively involved in felling GATHON, legendary Cherubim Virtue fucker, to begging for Cherub cock in like ten minutes from just a little teasing, I wonder how he’ll be three days into his first heat?
“Turn around, sweetheart, you're going to want to see this.” It suggested. Tahir took a breath and turned around, leaning against the desk, to see Arseni standing there, dick in hand, right at his face level. His mouth watered. Assuming he was being asked to suck it, he reached up with his hands to touch it, but was prevented from doing so by Arseni gently slapping his hands out of the way. “No, I didn't say you could touch. You have to stand there and watch.” It commanded him. He put his arms down immediately, lowering his head in shame. “Chin up. I said you have to watch.”
“Am I going to get to play with, um. With you?” He asked, anticipation building. He was having trouble keeping still.
“That depends,” Arseni taunted, pouring some lube into its hands and continuing to stroke itself, “Care to elaborate on what playing entails?”
“You putting your dick in my ass!” Tahir said quietly, embarrassed and frustrated.
“I think that might be too much for you,” Arseni commented, “Shhh… just watch.” It slowly jerked itself off, inches from the poor Virtue’s face. “Fuck, you are cute. I could just paint your pretty face right now…”
“Would it not feel better to… to do that… inside me…?” Tahir tried to suggest, really hoping that it would just let him TRY to take it.
“Oh, it would feel fucking INCREDIBLE for both of us, are you joking?” The Cherub said, still touching itself, “I’ve fucked a lot of Virtues, and I cannot remember the last time I came inside one of them and it DIDN’T make them forget how to speak for a while.”
“Then why not do it inside me?!” Tahir argued, tears budding at the corners of his eyes. “Please, please, come on, you are just…”
“Sooo close to your pretty face? I know, right?” It finished his sentence, “I COULD fuck you, or I could just stay right here and keep doing this until I get to see how much cuter you’d look covered in cum.”
“I was TRYING to say-”
“-That it’s just too big for you to take and you’d prefer this, and you're sooo thankful for the opportunity to-”
“I WANT YOU TO CUM IN MY ASS!” He shouted, shouting over Arseni. It paused its actions for a moment, a dangerous look in its eyes.
“That will not be happening today.” It finally replied. “Today, you get the option of cum all over your gorgeous face, in your pretty little mouth, or on those cute little tits.”
“But!!!” He protested, hypnotically drawn to Arseni’s hand movements as it resumed them, ”But you said you would fuck me…?”
“What I SAID was that I would make it fit, in time. That time is not today. I also told you I am very patient.” It said, “I do not think you're ready to comfortably take my cock. I think you will need some time to train up to what I have for you.”
“TRAIN?” He replied, incredulous, “How could I-”
“Ah ah ah, little virtue, I gave you a choice, and you don't have much time... All over your face, tits, or in your mouth?” Its movements sped up. Tahir swallowed.
“Uh, um!!! Mouth!!!” He chose, opening his mouth right as Arseni finished. He tried to keep his eyes open, but shut them on instinct as a good deal of the cum totally missed his mouth. It was like 60% in his mouth, 30% all over his face, 10% on his chest, and there was a lot of it. At least 75 mL. Maybe a little more. Either way, Tahir looked a mess. He did his best to swallow, having a little difficulty with just how much there was.
“Oh, shit,” The Cherub said, apologetically. “Sorry about that. Make your decision a little faster next time, hmm?”
“Y-yes, your grace…” He responded, attempting to wipe off his face. Next time sounded promising… Arseni watched as the pathetic little angel tried to clean the cum off of himself with his hands, sheepishly licking it off his fingers, as he DID really enjoy the taste... It was fucking adorable. But, the Cherub actually had shit to do after this and unfortunately couldn’t sit there forever in its office chair watching Tahir struggle with his first ever facial.
“Let me help you. Come here, sweet thing.” It said, reaching out its arms and picking the Virtue up, sitting him in its lap. It licked most of the cum off his chest easily, and then kissed him with a LOT of tongue. Tahir melted into it, enjoying just how much bigger Arseni was than himself. He wanted to stay in that kiss forever.
“Do, um… do you have a shower?” Tahir asked, noticing that there was a good deal of cum in his hair, too.
“...I do.” It admitted after a pause. It did not really want to tell him about the shower; what they just did here wasn’t very provable, no hard evidence. But it REALLY wasn’t supposed to have this shower. That was hard evidence of wrongdoing. “Look, just… do not tell anyone. Seriously. I really cannot have that secret out. And I trust you understand exactly what information about YOU will get out if you do tell them.” It said, very seriously.
“It is just a shower? What is wrong with that?” Tahir asked. Arseni sighed. As un-promising as that response was, it didn’t really have a choice. It couldn’t just let him walk out of here with cum in his hair, and Cherub cum doesn’t burn out like a Seraph’s. It had tried.
“Follow me,” It said, walking to the back of the office and pulling a book on the bookshelf. A panel on the wall opened, and inside was the most sacrilegious, obviously-for-sex shower Tahir had ever seen. First of all, the tiling was blood red with glorious blacker-than-black accents and patterning. There was a shower mounted fleshlight made of some kind of glistening, obviously magic of some kind material. There were four shower heads, one at Arseni’s height and two that were closer to Tahir’s, along with a fourth one that could be adjusted anywhere from the very top of the ceiling to the very floor, and could be handheld. There were some very conveniently placed seats. And to top it all off, the floor of the shower had a big ass sigil on the floor, the sigil of Azazel.
“...Oh.” Tahir said, stopping short. “Um… May I ask WHY exactly…?”
“I ask myself that every day,” Arseni responded.
“Did YOU commission this?!”
“Of course not! I have taste. This is Gathon’s old office.” Tahir stepped into the shower, followed by Arseni. The water turned on automatically, blasting them with water almost too hot to bear.
“B-but… when we did the investigation, we searched this place top to bottom! We burned his books, we tore his tiling off the walls, we confiscated everything! We would have seen… this!!!” Said Tahir, rinsing the cum out of his hair, much to Arseni’s aroused amusement.
“Evidently you did not,” Arseni smirked. “Azazel and Gathon were old college buddies, you know. I would not put it past them to collaborate.”
“I-Is Azazel… Do you know him..?”
“No,” Arseni lied, “But I wish I did. That guy knew how to fucking party.” Arseni and Tahir took a quick shower, which admittedly could have been quicker if Arseni hadn’t toyed with Tahir’s chest so much while he was trying to get clean. Eventually, Tahir had asked it to leave the shower, which it did, apologetically, saying something about having some “paperwork” to fill out for him anyway. Whatever.
Arseni sent him on his way shortly after he got clean, reminding him of the important Sexual Immorality Council Meeting happening in two days, and stating something that Tahir found quite ominous;
“If you need me,” It had said, handing him an intricately decorated envelope, “I will be available. Do try your hardest to make an appointment, but, I do understand you may soon have some… Circumstances, to work around. I will always take a walk in, or an after hours call, if it’s you.” It winked.
“I am sure I will be able to make an a-appointment,” Tahir said, already halfway out the door.
“Um… yes. Of course. How silly of me.” It said, noticing that its next actual appointment was right there, waiting, looking a little annoyed. “I simply mean to say, absolutely do not go making a sooner appointment with another Cherub in an… emergency.”
“Emergency?” Tahir looked confused. “What are you talking about? I do not foresee any kind of-”
“Just read the fucking paperwork, okay?” Arseni said, pointing to the envelope and discreetly motioning to its next appointment with a few of its eyes. “I don’t have time for this. Come in!” It shifted its attention to the Throne that was waiting.
Tahir felt completely shell shocked from that whole experience, but had little other choice but to walk away like he hadn’t just cleaned Cherubim cum out of his hair and find a secluded place to read this fucking paperwork, or whatever. He settled on a study room, assuming the paperwork was related to the failed mission to Earth, and not their little secret.
That paperwork was included in the envelope, at least. But in addition to the boring forms and signed incident report with a lie about how no human was located (much better than Tahir could have written) there were also another few papers. Many more. One was just a list of ways that Tahir could contact Arseni directly, from directions on how to make an appointment to the exact address of its rooms, plus ideas for cover stories to tell the fucking guards. Another was a detailed guide going over what exactly Arseni meant by “training” earlier, which was basically just a “how to” guide on self-fisting. He felt very nervous, and cursed himself for how hot he found all this. The last page was a letter, a letter that looked like Arseni had multiple copies of just on hand, that was annotated with a different colored ink.

“Come again soon! I trust you enjoyed yourself,” It started. Oh, Jesus… Tahir thought, This fucking guy… It went on from there, unfortunately. “If this is your first time having sex, please note that you will very likely begin your first heat or rut cycle in the next twelve to twenty four hours. Do not panic! This is very manageable. Any non-virgin angel has these cycles. Heat tends to be a bit more noticeable to the naked eye than rut, but, either way, you will manage. I am rooting for you!
These mating cycles cause a great deal of arousal that is quite difficult to quell without intervention from another party. They go away on their own within three to six days reaching peak on approximately day 1.5-3, usually, although some ruts last for nine days with a peak at day four. Guilty as charged! These cycles recur each month, and like a human menstrual cycle, they are tied to the moon. You will get used to it.
And while you are at it, may I humbly suggest you choose yours truly as the other party with which to quell the flames? If you are experiencing a mating cycle and need assistance, please, do not hesitate to contact me in any or all of the ways mentioned on the attached contact sheet. If you are new to this game, please do NOT start contacting random Cherubim for hookups. You do not know who is chill and who is not, and we Cherubim get a little… territorial. I like you very much and I wouldn't want to have to see you have a less than pleasant time with a more aggressive or lower quality Cherub…
Please ESPECIALLY do not contact Raphael. That guy sucks in bed and is a surefire way to get yourself felled.
Be reassured in the knowledge that you are not alone. The sexually active population in heaven grows by the very hour. Be careful and have fun.
P.S. If you were not able to take as much as you wanted to this time around, please refer to the tutorials included in this letter. I threw in whichever ones I thought were most relevant to you.
P.P.S. Tahir, love ya, see you soon!

Kisses!!!
Arseni <3”

+++

“Arseni, we talked about this.” Said the Throne, who'd been waiting like thirty minutes past her appointment time to be seen.
“I'm terribly sorry, I just had an emergent walk in from a Virtue on Earth assignment. It took a bit longer than I expected.” The Cherub explained.
“You're not fooling anyone. There's still fucking CUM on your floor, Arseni, you GOTTA be more discreet about this kind of thing.”
“Ah, shit. I knew I forgot something…” it responded, “Thank you for making me aware.”
“Look, all I need is a sign off from you to get me out of the stupid fucking All Ophanim Council meeting next week. I don't want to be there, and I've got a certain Principality who's hot to go.”
“What do you want me to say you are doing instead?” Arseni asked, taking out its clipboard.
“I don't know, can you just make something up? I have to be somewhere else in like ten minutes, you fucking asshole…” She looked at the clock in the wall in mild surprise.
“Well, we need to be on the same page. How about I send you out on assignment?” It suggested.
“How about NO.” Replied the Throne. “I am strictly angel for angel, you know this. I hate going to Earth and I don't want to talk to any humans.”
“Well, if you can't go on assignment, then I'm afraid I can't help you.” Arseni replied, smiling sweetly. “This angelfucker human is really starting to piss me off. I already sent four Thrones and a Virtue. Three Thrones just couldn't find him, one never came back, and the human tried to fuck my Virtue!! BEFORE I could! Damn near took his virginity, too.” Arseni put its head in its hands. “Angelfucking I can excuse, I really can, but-”
“But you're a slut for virgin Virtues and your type is hard to come by? Yeah, I know, we've had this conversation before. Are you gonna sign my thing???”
“I have to put a stop to this. And you ARE strictly angel for angel, maybe you would be a good Throne to send…”
“Forget about it.” She said, getting up to leave.
“What if I write your letter AND give you access to my rooms next week during the meeting you're skipping?” Arseni suggested. She stopped, rotating her wheels in place.
“...You gonna have a fully stocked bar this time, and not just like, three half empty bottles of rosé in your wine fridge?” She questioned, rolling her eyes. “I'm trying to impress this girl, she's like, kind of a big deal!”
“Yes, yes, of course! The whole nine yards. Clean sheets and everything.”
“It's a deal if you can also get me coke.” It was Arseni’s turn to roll its eyes.
“No. No fucking cocaine! Last time was just too much, I am cutting you off.”
“Worth a shot,” Said the Throne, “Alright, what am I up against?”

Chapter Text

Aethriel never really slept in heaven. It really wasn't supposed to, being one of the Ones Who Never Sleep and all. It technically didn't NEED to, either, being able to function without sleep indefinitely. When it did sleep (which was very much a forbidden thing,) it never slept for longer than an hour. That was the maximum, it would wake up after that.
Now that it lived on Earth, it had no expectation of that to change. It slept a lot more often, now, but it had thought at first that this was because it had the opportunity to, nobody was watching over it or expecting it to constantly sing praises at them. It got into the habit of sleeping for about an hour a night, at least every other night, usually with Isaiah, before getting up to go look at the stars or go on a flight, do some cooking, make some art, read, that kind of thing. Sometimes it would stay in bed with Isaiah for a few hours just watching him sleep. Watching humans sleep was definitely something Aethriel had always enjoyed doing, and it was even more fun up close.
Lately though, that one hour max was getting longer. If it wasn't woken up by something, it could stay asleep for two or even three hours at a time. And it really couldn't easily remember the last night that it didn't sleep for at least an hour. This was… concerning, to say the least, for the Seraph.
At least when it was asleep, it never had any dreams. Not that it couldn't remember them, but that it just did not have them. In their place was simply darkness. It vastly preferred it that way. It had thousands of years of memories it would rather not have rehashed into some hellish nightmare world of terror; Isaiah had told it about some of his dreams and it truly did not want to experience that kind of thing.
Tonight, very drunk and completely exhausted, it had its first dream.
It was flying again, up in heaven, in the throne room on the mountain that it had spent most of its existence in. It tried to match the movements of the other Seraphim, to fly in formation, to lift its voice and sing, but it was not able to do so. Its wing hurt very badly, and it fell out of formation. Its voice felt raw and tired and stuck, it could not match the notes of the other angels no matter how hard it tried. They were singing a song it could not even remember the words to, if it ever even knew them at all. What even WAS this? It wasn't anything like the droning praise songs they usually sang. It felt like it was waking up from being struck with some incredible force, it felt so confused and was becoming disoriented by the light and sound.
Was this song new? They sometimes had new songs, but this one had barely any “holy holy holy is the Lord of Spirits” lines. None, actually, which was weird, and even weirder was the lack of discernible topic: it was more like …pleading. Apologies. Begging for forgiveness. Set to the beautiful music the Seraphim were capable of producing, it sounded haunting.
Aethriel looked around more closely at the other Seraphim and noticed that many of them were gravely injured; missing or unusable eyes, broken or even missing wings, gash marks and stab wounds weeping manna, some were cleaved almost in half. They were crying, there WAS no formation to fall in line with, there WERE no lyrics to learn. It stopped flying, instead hovering in place and staring at the scene in front of it, trying to make sense of what was happening. It had only been paused in the air for five seconds before the wrath of God struck it, the searing, burning hit of hellfire, the smell of ozone and burning flesh and bone. It snaked across the Seraph's body and wrapped around it by its already injured wing and the one above it, crushing and twisting and pulling the creature up into the upper heavens.

No… it thought, not again… this cannot be happening again…

It dangled again in front of the Most High, and He shook it back and forth and back and forth and-

Its eyes opened all at once. Isaiah was shaking it awake.
“Hey! Hey, Aethriel, are you okay???” He asked. “I got up to get water and you were crying and begging me not to hurt you.” Isaiah's alarm clock read 4:33 am. Its feathers felt wet with tears.
“W-who are you?! Where are we?” It asked in a panicked whisper, “Where is Niamie???? Are we in Hell?!”
“I'm Isaiah, remember?” He said, trying to be gentle and quiet. “I'm your roommate. I'm a human. We're in our house. Are you okay?”
“Our… house. Yes. Our house.” it started. It looked around the room as its mind calmed down and realized there was no immediate danger, trying to focus on familiar objects: The mysterious bass guitar in the corner that Isaiah never talked about and refused to move, half of a bigass red concrete ball Aethriel stole from outside a Target, Isaiah's dresser that they'd painted together to look like the sky and the clouds. It tried to force itself to calm down, to tell him it was okay, that everything was fine and it was okay now and it was sorry about all that. But it really HADN’T been okay. It WASN'T okay. Isaiah wasn't pushy, he didn't ask about heaven, he didn't ask about anything related to its multi thousand year stint as the highest order of divine being, really, except when it directly came up, and Aethriel had been actively avoiding having it come up. Aethriel had figured the best way to deal with what it had been through was to turn over a whole new leaf and pretend heaven never happened. It had been doing… okay. Everything is fine. EVERYTHING IS SUPPOSED TO BE OKAY NOW! “I… I knew that. We. Live here now. On Earth… You helped me get to bed last night when.. when I was too drunk.”
“Okay well that answers my next question. One more, okay? What year is it?”
“5785.” It said. Isaiah opened his mouth and then closed it again and reached for his phone.
“Hang on a second I'm looking something up… okay, yeah, that's correct. You're with it.” He concluded. Aethriel still looked very upset. “Look, I'm going to get up and get some water. How about you lay down and I'll cover you in your favorite blanket?” Isaiah had noticed a few months ago that Aethriel really enjoyed the texture of those fleece blankets, so he'd gotten it one it could have for itself. It was dark blue and had stars and constellations on it. When Isaiah showed it the gift, it was so overwhelmed by emotion it cried in his arms for an hour, left the house for three days, and came back with thousands of dollars worth of gold jewelry that it had gotten from “somewhere ethical, do not worry about it.” Isaiah had been pawning the gold off as non-suspiciously as he could to pay off his credit card debt. When the angel found out he was doing this, Isaiah expected it to be very upset, but instead it had just nodded and been like “Very righteous of you, Isaiah,” completely seriously, no sarcasm. Isaiah never figured out what the fuck that meant or if Aethriel understood what credit cards were or did.
“Please do not leave me here,” It said, “I do not wish to be alone right now.”
“Yeah, of course. Come with me.” Isaiah said. “Let's get up, let's go. You could probably do with some water too.”
They got up and tried their best to be silent as they got two cups of water from the kitchen. Tears continued to fall from the Seraph's many eyes, and it shook with residual adrenaline, if angels even had that.
The two beings sat back down in Isaiah's mattress on the floor after delicately bypassing Edon and Ezekiel who were passed out half in and half off the couch. Aethriel still felt pretty drunk.
“What happened?” Isaiah asked.
“I think I had… a nightmare.” It confessed. “I was back in heaven. It was very bad.” It managed to explain, but it could get no further. Isaiah moved closer to the angel. “I did not even know I could have… dreams. It frightened me very badly. I did not know if it was real or not.”
“Would you like to talk about it?” Isaiah asked, taking a sip of his water.
“...I want to talk about it. But not right now.” It said. “It was scary. I was scared.”
“Later then?” Isaiah asked, understandingly.
“Yes.”
“... I'll hold you to that.” He replied. “I think it would do you some good to talk about… everything. About the adjustment to Earth. About how things were.” He said.
“... I think you are right.” It said. “Not tonight.”
“No, of course. Not tonight.” He replied. “Do you want me to hold you?”
“...Very much so. Please do not let me go.” Aethriel replied. Isaiah laid back down and beckoned the angel to follow him, which it did. They found a comfortable position to lie together in after a little shifting around. Aethriel finally was able to relax a little bit, now that it felt safe and secure.
It listened as Isaiah's heartbeat and breathing slowed as he fell back to sleep underneath its wings.

Chapter Text

Aethriel woke up with a TERRIBLE hangover. Somehow it had slept for an additional like four straight hours, waking up after Isaiah was already gone to work. Edon and Ezekiel were asleep on the nasty couch in the living room. Aethriel sighed and cleaned it up with its divine fire, hoping to make the poor human more comfortable. Thinking as hard as it could, it decided to drink some goddamn water. It drank over a gallon of water directly from the sink before feeling any better at all. This hangover sucked.
Its head was still spinning and it felt so nauseous it could barely keep even the water down. Trying to think of anything else it could do to distract itself from the pain, it turned on the living room TV, much to Edon’s disapproval as it woke up.
“Hey! What are you doing?!” It asked, opening an eye to stare at the other angel.
“I do not want to speak to you,” It said. “You had NO right to hit me. I am very upset with you.”
“Well if not for my sake, for Ezekiel’s sake. He is very tired.” It whispered.
“Oh, I am sure you care so much about his comfort considering you fucked him so hard he bled all over the couch!” Aethriel shot back in a harsh whisper.
“It is period blood!!!” Edon whispered back, “I only caused a small amount of damage and I FIXED it after!!!”
“Big difference!” Aethriel said sarcastically. “I want to watch TV. If you have a problem with that you can fuck right off!” It flipped through channels and eventually landed on the history channel which was playing some bullshit about ancient aliens.
“...so, to be clear, I am not still dreaming…” Ezekiel said, turning over and wiping his eyes with his hands. “You two are actually like… biblical angels, we did just meet at a bar last night and we did have sex?” He stretched his arms above his head.
“Look what you did, now he is awake!!!” Edon admonished. It had been thoroughly enjoying cuddling with him all night, and had not wanted it to stop so soon.
“I was already pretty much awake.” He reassured it, “Isaiah woke me up when he left an hour ago.” Aethriel looked at Edon with a self righteous expression on its face. “Thank you for letting me stay the night. You guys are really cool for that, especially Isaiah, I assume this is his place and all.”
“It is nothing.” Aethriel assured him. “I would like to apologize for how drunk I was last night. I honestly cannot remember large chunks of what happened, but I remember you fingering me before I got trashed, and I vaguely remember you holding my hair back while I vomited. Thank you for both of those actions.”
“And I would like to apologize for… all the yelling… last night. I… lost myself a bit, and I am not used to interacting with humanity.”
“Hey, it's no big deal.” He replied. Sudden realization seemed to hit him right then. “Oh, FUCK!!!! I went to sleep without even putting a pad… SHIT!!!!” He got up, surveying the damage. “Fuck… all my usual stuff is in my car.”
“I can take you back to it,” Edon suggested. Aethriel looked annoyed that Edon had beat it to the punch.
“That would be awesome. Thank you. Let me just go take a shower first because… I mean. I'm a little gross right now and, not gonna lie I haven't really showered in a week or two.” He confessed.
Edon and Aethriel stared directly at Ezekiel. It was a lot of eyes to keep track of.
“...May I join?” They both said at once. Edon did so more for ‘prefers humans unwashed’ reasons, Aethriel for ‘gets off on cleanliness and purity’ reasons. It was also very much craving closeness from a human right now.
“Sure, you can both get in with me.” He said. The two angels looked at each other again, with disdain.
“How about just one of us?” Edon suggested. “How about me, because, you know. Aethriel, you already showered last night.”
“How about you go fuck yourself?” Aethriel replied. “I am extremely hungover right now and I am not in the mood for your bullshit.”
“Please don't fight,” Ezekiel said, feeling really embarrassed and kind of turned on. He was truly shocked that either of the angels were into him at all after last night, especially Edon, who Ezekiel incorrectly assumed had had its fill and would be annoyed by him at this point. “I really am completely fine with both of you coming with me.”
“I do not think that is a very good idea,” Aethriel said, closing its central eye and turning away. “Edon could really hurt you, or me.” Ezekiel sighed.
“How about me and Edon just go get my car, and you can both cool down and forgive each other, and then we can all shower together?” They looked skeptical. “Aethriel, flying is gonna make your hangover way worse.”
“...You are likely correct.” It said, after thinking about how bad it would feel to fly right now, “But I want an apology before anything involving the both of us happens.”
Ezekiel resorted to stuffing a bunch of folded up paper towels in his underwear to deal with the bleeding until he could get to his car. He did check to see if Isaiah had anything, but was very disappointed with his supply of two tampons that looked like they were years old and sitting at the very bottom of his bathroom cabinet underneath industrial strength cleaning chemicals.
Ezekiel’s car was parked in a ditch off the side of the rural highway that Smokey's was on. Edon landed nearby and Ezekiel removed himself from its wheels, where he'd been sitting for the flight.
“THAT is your car?” Edon asked, looking at the beat up minivan with tape and plastic bags over one of the back windows. “Does it drive?”
“Shut up! I live out of this thing, I know it isn't pretty but it's all I have.” Ezekiel said, quietly. “Help me push it.”
“How do you afford to drink at a bar, if you live like this??” It asked, not intentionally trying to be an ass but doing it anyway. Ezekiel sighed, having to remind himself that this was coming from someone who actually didn’t know any better. He could sense this was going to be a running theme.
“Let me put it this way,” he shouted out the window as Edon pushed the car up and onto the road. “I am at a point in my life where I have sex with humans for money because I'm desperate. I am not good at sleeping with humans for money because I’m pretty ugly and bad at advertising on top of that. My last $20 wasn’t going to be enough for first and last month's rent on an apartment, so, I decided I should get myself drunk at a bar and try and do some… work.” He said.
“O-oh, I see.” It suddenly felt very guilty for some of the things it had said and done last night. “If I had known… I would not have… I am sorry.” It apologized.
“It's… it's fine.” He said. “Come on, get in the car with me.” Edon transformed and silently got in the car. It was a mess in there, and it had to move a pile of jackets and books to the backseat in order to fit. “Welcome to my place. The seats go all the way back.” He joked.
“I… see.” It said. He began the long drive to Isaiah’s place. After a very long silence, unbroken, as Ezekiel’s radio did not work, he finally spoke up again.
“It seems like you’re… uncomfortable.” He said. “I didn’t think it was necessary to tell you that I’m a prostitute, I thought you probably wouldn’t give a shit, but, I mean. Clearly that was knowledge you needed. And I’m sorry. We don’t have to do any of that stuff again.”
“No, no no no, please, please don’t say that!” It begged, “I very much want to lie with you again.”
“Then why have you been so quiet??? It’s freaking me out!!” Ezekiel said, speeding down the country road.
“I… I just, I’m… I have no money to pay you.” It admitted. “And I anticipate you are going to be quite upset, if you aren’t already. If I had known there was a price, I would not have-”
“No, I- Edon!!! Why would I expect YOU to pay me for sex? I know you don’t have usable money! You’re not even from this dimension!”
“Then why would you have sex with me?!”
“Because I WANTED to?!” He said. “Just because I have sex for money doesn’t mean I ALWAYS have sex for money!”
“I… see. I understand now, I think…” It said again. “...I’m sorry I called you a stupid whore in Latin while we were having sex… I do not think you are any more stupid than the average human.”
“Apology accepted!!” He said, too loudly. Another long silence followed. Edon watched Ezekiel very closely, seeing just how anxious and upset he looked, desperately wishing he could read minds like a Seraph or a Cherub… It thought about how exactly to work into conversation how hard it was to sit still in this body in this car, how much it was thinking about last night and how badly it wanted a repeat, and how sorry it was that it couldn’t find the right words to say what it felt about him. It thought about the taste of his pussy, and how he’d probably be bleeding a lot more today than yesterday, if it remembered correctly how periods work. It thought about how soft his skin felt and how it wanted so badly to hold him as closely as it could while it knotted him again, it was so embarrassed about how their first session had gone… "If I had money, I would pay you for sex.” It said. It immediately realized how unhelpful that probably was, but couldn’t come up with anything better. Edon had never been very good at talking to humans.
“...Thank you.” He said. That was pretty much the nicest thing anyone had said to him in a while. “You don’t have to pay me. I really am sorry. I like you. And I completely understand if you decide to spend the rest of your mating cycle thing with another human, if this whole thing has gotten too awkward.” Edon was a bit confused by this statement.
“What other human??” Edon asked. “Did you not see my success rate at the bar? Do you believe I would do much better a second time around? Ezekiel, you are right here and seem to be willing.”
“Is that really my best quality?” Ezekiel asked, half joking.
“In what context?!” Edon asked, frustrated. It didn't know how to handle something like this! Why wouldn’t he just understand that it liked him a lot and that it was just really confused by all this?!
“In general.”
“In general?! I don't really know you very well, Ezekiel, we only met last night.” It explained. “All I know for sure is that I think you suck less than the other humans I personally know, you’re horny, and you are very fun to have sex with. I am sorry.” It said. Ezekiel was silent, and Edon was pretty sure it had said the wrong thing. “B-but, um, I like other things about you other than your proximity and consent!!!” It reassured him. “I think you are very kind, you offered your help to us very readily. I like the way your voice sounds.” It offered up. “You sound, um. You sound… good. I really like your voice a lot.”
“Thank you.” Ezekiel said, “It’s my favorite thing about me. Testosterone is really a miracle drug, too bad I can’t get it anymore.” He said. “I really like your voice, too. I think you’re really fucking pretty in both bodies. I love how your wheels have that glowing inscription, it makes me want to trace it with my fingers, I want to put a piece of paper on you and rub a crayon all over it to make a rubbing.” Edon didn’t know what crayons were, but that sounded like it would feel pretty good.
“...I’d let you do that.” It said. “I do not know what it says. Maybe you could figure it out.”
“Can you not read Old Aramaic??? You of all beings should be able to read that.” Ezekiel asked. He looked over at the Throne for a second. Edon was completely naked in his passenger seat as they'd forgotten to bring any clothes with them. It was very much enjoying the praise, which was evident from the erection it sported, which, to its credit, it was trying to hide. The drastic shift to “You should know this” rattled it a bit.
“… I can only read what you would call archaic Latin.” It explained. It wanted to follow that up with ‘and not very well,’ but it decided maybe he didn’t need to know that right now. Fuck, it needed to change the topic. Ezekiel definitely had above surface level knowledge of the divine and Edon didn’t want him to find out how much of a fucking loser it had been in heaven. “Um… can I have something to… cover myself? I understand that human cops are not fond of nudity, and they can be found on roadways.” It said.
“Oh, shit. Do you want to borrow like. A hoodie or something? It's cold in here.”
“Yes, that would be nice.” It said. “I am not really affected by the temperature but I do prefer to have clothes on for… modesty purposes.” It stated, glad that the conversation topic was now something other than its fuckups and its illiteracy. “Grab something out of the back, you can take whatever. Not permanently, but. For the drive.” He said. “We still have like an hour and a half to go.” Edon turned around and grabbed a hoodie with a fairly prestigious college name on it as well as some cargo shorts. It put them on the best it could with its limited knowledge of how to put clothes on. It breathed in his scent from the hoodie and tried hard not to make it too obvious as it palmed itself through its shorts. Oh, fuck. Maybe going back to talking about its subpar reading skills would have been better. Being covered in clothing did not quell the heat like it thought it would.
“W-wow…” It said, feeling arousal wash over it as it became more fully immersed in his scent. “… your clothing… it is so soft…”
“Thanks. I got that hoodie when I got into college, it was a gift from my Dad.” He explained. “I wear it all the time. I mean, I haven't worn it for like two weeks because it's been too cold, but...”
“You smell… so…ffffucking…good...” It said, half listening to what he was saying. It was trying. It really was. But… it was immediately evident to Edon that the last time Ezekiel had worn this hoodie, he'd been ovulating. The pervasive scent of human luteinizing hormone and follicle stimulating hormone was absolutely incompatible with its ability to control itself two days into rut, no matter how many times it came in him last night.
“Are you okay over there?” He asked.
“Okay??” it asked, deciding it didn't care and that it needed to touch itself right immediately now. It struggled to unbutton the shorts, and its dick sprung up into the cold air. “By my standards I am VERY okay, I am, I am great, I… fuck… why could we not have met two weeks ago?” Its rhetorical question was met with a soft laugh from Ezekiel.
“Why two weeks ago? You love that hoodie that much?” He asked.
“You were ovulating two weeks ago,” it explained. “I can smell it on your clothing. You didn't wash this? You must have worn this the entire time… Fuck. I'm glad you did not wash this.” It said, pulling the collar of the hoodie up so it could put its nose directly to the fabric. Jerking off and having its face buried in the material of the hoodie quickly became not enough.
“Oh, right, mating cycle, yeah, I get it now. Sorry about that.” Ezekiel said, “Do you need me to pull over?” That was a complicated question. Yes, yes it did desperately need him to pull over. But Aethriel would be so pissed if they were hours late, and it would come looking for them, and Edon did NOT want to share this human with it.
“N-no, it's fine…” it made itself say. This was getting frustrating. “Ezekiel, please forgive me for what I am about to do.” It said, pulling the hoodie off entirely and kind of folding it into a ball.
“Are you about to fuck my hoodie?” Ezekiel asked it, knowing full well the answer was ‘yes.’
“....No?” It positioned its dick on top of the roll and kind of folded it over itself to create a surface with friction. “...yes…”
“You can't even wait an hour?” He teased.
“In an hour, Aethriel will be there!!!” Edon complained. Static buzzed around the edges of its form as it fought to keep itself together.
“I'm sure you two can share.” He said.
“NO!!” Edon whined, moving its hips and fucking the ball of fabric, trying to maintain friction where it needed it. “I-I do not want to share you!!!”
“I dunno, I think it would be pretty hot to MAKE you guys share.” Ezekiel said.
“Nooo, come on…” It begged, “That Seraph will do nothing but talk about how much better it is than I, and it will probably try to take your pussy all for itself…”

Meanwhile, at home, Aethriel was lying on the floor, nauseous and hungover. Lord, forgive me, I will never drink again… it thought, trying to distract itself with shitty Earth TV. I feel so sick…

“Aww, well, maybe I can tip the scale a little bit?” Ezekiel teased, keeping his eyes on the road as the Throne impatiently rewrapped the hoodie around its cock, so that it could hold the sides of it and bounce it in its lap. “If you promise to sincerely apologize to Aethriel and settle your differences, I promise you can have my pussy all to yourself when we shower together.”
“ENTIRELY to myself?!” It asked, contemplating the possibilities.
“Entirely to yourself.”
“The Seraph will not even get a taste?”
“If that’s what you want, sure.” Ezekiel agreed.
“Deal.” Edon said. “Y-you have no idea how badly I need to be inside you again,” It said, still humping his hoodie. “Can you please, um..,.. Uh…. how do you feel about biting?” It asked, cautiously.
“Like being bitten?”
“No no no, I, um, I want you to bite me.” It confessed, “Hard. Please.”
“Not while I’m driving the car!” He said.
“No!!! I mean like, um. In the shower.” it explained. “I… oh… I have been thinking for the whole drive about holding you against the wall and just. Fffuck. Sliding into you, holding your thighs, your ass, your hips,. I do not even care that it will be in my human form. I want you to bite me until your teeth TOUCH.”
“I dunno…” Ezekiel joked, “You gonna pay extra for that?”

When they arrived home, Aethriel was waiting at the door, holding a cup of coffee.
“Are you ready to apologize?” It said. Edon was still in its human form, very unhappy about Ezekiel making it zip up its pants.
“...Yes.” It said. “I am sorry.”
“For?”
“Hitting you. I should not have hit you, that was wrong of me, there is no excuse. I am repentant and I will not do it again. My emotions got the better of me. I REALLY wanted to kill that little shit.” It confessed. “I trust you can at least understand that; that Virtue looked me in my eyes and called me ABOMINABLE for an action that I did not WANT, I did not ask that Seraph to touch me in that way. He went out of his way to acquit the Seraph and have God punish ME.”
“... I can understand that.” It replied. “I did not really know what the situation was. Maybe I should not have held you back.” They stood there for a second, and Edon took off its clothing before transforming back to its normal body (they’d learned quite quickly that not taking the clothes off first leads to them being completely shredded to pieces in the transformation. Aethriel was quite upset about the loss of its party dress.)
“Can I kiss you?” It asked Aethriel.
“...Yes.” The Seraph said, and they moved a bit closer to one another before leaning in for a kiss. They parted briefly before Edon pulled the Seraph in again for another, then another.
“You two nerds ready to shower?” Ezekiel asked, closing the front door behind them. “I feel so gross.” They broke the kiss.
“Yes.” Aethriel replied. “Also if you know how to make things feel less… dizzy… advice would be appreciated.” It said.
They all went to Isaiah’s bathroom, which featured a pretty accessible shower. His late uncle was not ambulatory at the end of his life and Isaiah had gotten it modified so that the shower was roll-in for a wheelchair, and there was a wide ledge that a person could sit on. It wasn’t perfect but it got the job done. It easily fit three relatively normal sized people, but it wasn’t going to fit the angels without a transformation. That being said, Isaiah’s shower was a huge red flag. It contained three bottles and three bottles only: an industrial sized container of 5 in 1 generalized body soap For Men, and a pump bottle of silicone lube, and a flip top bottle of water based lube. What the fuck was up with that, Ezekiel did not want to know.
“This is nice,” Ezekiel said, setting down his towel on the bathroom counter. He stripped, throwing his clothes on the floor and stepping into the shower after turning the water on. The two angels in human form stood there staring at him for a good ten seconds before they slowly turned to look at each other again. “You guys getting in, or?”
“I already called dibs on his pussy,” Edon said, getting in the shower.
“Hey, Ezekiel is a person! You cannot simply lay claims to human body parts!” It argued, “I cannot believe the disrespect you show him even after all he has done for you!”
“It was his idea!” Edon replied, pressing Ezekiel’s chest to the wall of the shower and kicking his legs apart. FUCK he looks good like this, maybe I’ll take him from behind instead of holding him up…?
“Wait! Edon, stop it, I want to get clean first!” He protested, trying to push off the wall. Edon stopped its movements when he asked, but didn’t let go right away. Its dick was less than two inches away from his pussy. If it could just move a few inches closer, get its hands around his slutty little waist… no… it shouldn’t…
“Edon, you better stop.” Aethriel said, grabbing its arms and yanking it backwards, shoving it onto the ledge. “I can hear you thinking so loud it is hurting my brain. He said stop. Sit down or I really WILL untrue you.”
“I thought you said Seraphim don’t read the minds of angels!” It whined, crossing its arms.
“You are not acting like an angel,” It replied, “You are acting like a fucking DOG. Dogs are within limits.” It replied.
“So by ‘do not’ you didn’t mean ‘cannot’?” It asked.
“Yes. Obviously. I CAN do pretty much whatever I want. I DO NOT because it would be harmful.” It said, “You should learn to do the same.”
“Aethriel, do you wanna help me get clean?” He asked, holding up the bottle of soap.
“I very much would.” It replied. He poured some of the transparent red soap into its hands. It rubbed them together and then began to rub it onto Ezekiel’s back.
“Hey!!! That is not fair!” Edon complained, standing up. Aethriel gave it a ‘don’t you fucking dare’ look, and it sat back down. “I want to touch him too!”
“Are you going to play nice with the human?” Aethriel asked.
“Come on, I didn’t even DO anything!!!” Edon insisted.
“Wrong answer.” Aethriel said, cleaning on and under Ezekiel’s arms to get itself in a position to … clean… his chest. He had very small tits, A cups, comparable to Aethriel’s in size but not shape, and one of them was pierced. He had a decent amount of hair on his chest that framed them perfectly. The Seraph toyed with the little gold ring with its fingertips, and Ezekiel bit his lip. “Sit on your hands.” It commanded.
“I am not taking orders from YOU!” Edon seethed, bringing one of its hands up to touch itself. Edon had really not gotten the hang of jerking off yet, it was being way too rough with itself. Ezekiel made a mental note to maybe sit it down one day and give it like… a lesson, or something, because this was the second time he’d seen it do this, and it looked like it was going to hurt itself.
“It’s fine, Aethriel, it didn’t mean any harm.” Ezekiel said, “Edon’s just really excitable, it wants to come play! Estne ius?”
“Plus quam aliquid,” It responded, “Let me play!!”
“I asked you a question.” The Seraph said, moving its hands to his waist. Edon’s eyes narrowed.
“YES I will play nice!” It finally said.
“Come over here,” Ezekiel replied, and Edon did not need to be told twice. It got up from where it was sitting and put its hands out.
“I want to help you get clean,” It said. “Give me soap.” Ezekiel did so, putting some soap in its hands.
“You are only doing that so his pussy becomes available faster,” Admonished the Seraph, who was doing a lot more playing with his soapy tits than actually helping at all.
“Oh, shut up!” Ezekiel said, turning around. “Go ahead, do whatever.” Edon immediately went for his ass, touching him and trying to at least pretend like its goal was getting him clean. It knelt down to do his thighs and his legs, too, and Aethriel got more soap with which to do his hair. “This is REALLY fuckin’ nice. You guys are awesome. Only one last place to clean,” He commented, doing that area himself as he really didn’t trust either of them to not get soap directly inside his urethra. The angels looked at each other after he was done, trying to think about how they were going to share him now.
“...I know I said I would play nice,” Edon said, “But you can ask the human yourself what he said about his pussy in the car, and I am not going to let you take that from me.”
“What?” Aethriel asked, looking at Ezekiel.
“I… may have promised it could have exclusive access to my pussy for this shower experience if it agreed to apologize and make up with you.” He said.
“In that case I do not think it has apologized enough,” Aethriel said.
“Ignore the Seraph, please,” Ezekiel said, spreading his legs. “Go ahead, how about you touch me here? Be gentle.” Edon stood up. It carefully reached between his legs and tried its best to yet again just gently, softly touch him, and not go entirely insane over how SOFT he felt down there. Aethriel looked on in envy.
“Oh, fuck,” it moaned, as Aethriel turned his head to the side so it could kiss him. Its lips were plush and soft and Ezekiel melted into the kiss, stepping backwards a bit to lean against the shower wall. “C-can I please pick you up and fuck you against the wall now?? Please??” It begged, “I-I’ve been waiting for hours now, I’ve been good, I've played nicely!!!”
“Hmm… then how would Aethriel get to play?” Ezekiel asked, “That wouldn’t be fair to it.”
“I could put my fingers up its ass.” Aethriel offered. It had done that with Isaiah a few times after he’d made some comment about how trans guys can have a prostate after a few years on T. It hadn’t worked on Isaiah, but it had given Aethriel some outlet for its desire to milk a prostate someday. It had learned about it from some of its late night reading: Isaiah had a book on his bookshelf which was about prostate milking, and the Seraph had definitely read that one cover to cover multiple times, and maybe potentially jerked off to a few of the diagrams.
“Ehh, that wouldn’t really be fair to you. I want you to actually get off too.” He said.
“Oh, I would not have suggested that if it would not get me off.” Aethriel explained.
“Edon? You wanna be penetrated?” Ezekiel asked.
“...” It didn't really care, honestly. It had its head turned so that its good eye was trained on Ezekiel’s bush. It squeezed its fists at its sides to prevent itself from just picking him up right there and then, Aethriel could fuck right off for all it cared. It was in desperate need of unprotected boypussy. “I don't care, sure! Just let me pick you up!” It begged, “Aethriel can do what it wants, but I, please, human, please, I've been waiting for so long…”
“Okay, alright, I'm sorry. You're right.” Ezekiel said. “Go ahead-!” As soon as he said the word ‘go’, Edon pressed him into the shower wall, grabbed his thighs and lifted him up. It struggled for a second to line up its dick at his entrance. “Come on, ah, please -!” but as soon as it was lined up it pushed inside him, trying its best not to just slam it in there, and only mildly succeeding.. This was a much better fit than its dick in its other form, Ezekiel couldn't lie, it was much smaller and he could take the whole thing to the base. Edon rested its forehead on the shower wall behind him to try and force itself to relax, to keep its hips still, to let him adjust… Humans… are fragile… you have… to play…nice…
“You okay?” Ezekiel asked Edon. In the background, Aethriel compared the bottles of water based and silicone based lube.
“I-I am trying to give you time,” It explained, panting, really not a huge fan of having to use lungs, “I am…playing nice!!! Like you two wanted!”
“Oh, sweetheart you don't have to give me time!” Ezekiel said, “Go ahead, do what you need to do.” He said, gently squeezing his muscles around the Throne and causing it to bang its head into the tile in shock.
“Fff,, okay,, if you are sure,-!” It said, repositioning its hands and beginning to thrust. This felt very different from how it felt to fuck him in its true form; it didn't feel any worse or any better, just DIFFERENT. It scratched a totally different itch. It felt very connected. It wanted to be bitten.
“Feels really good to be balls deep, hmm?” Ezekiel teased, as Edon thrusted into him at a wildly irregular pace and rate. It was struggling to hold him up not due to a lack of strength (if anything it was holding him like he weighed nothing,) but because of how slippery everything was.
“Y-yes, oh, fuck, yes, hhhfuck, take everything, please,” it babbled, barely paying attention to Aethriel coming up behind it and tracing a lubed finger over its hole. The Seraph had determined the silicone lube would be better since it was sort of waterproof, as determined by its examination of the molecular structure of the liquids. It had not considered how much more slippery the shower floor was about to get.
“I am going to start slowly, okay?” The Seraph said, trying to keep its fingers in contact with its entrance as Edon moved its hips. “Then once they are in, you will essentially be fucking yourself on my hands…” It slid a finger in, and searched around for its prostate as best it could considering the angle it was forced to come at this from. Fortunately, Edon’s was very easy to locate. It was pretty fucking turned on.
It jolted at the intrusion and slowed down its movements while trying to adjust to the new feeling. It felt. Weird. Not bad. Just weird. Aethriel cautiously curled its finger into its prostate.
Now it didn't know which way to move its hips. Fuck. That… that felt good. It made its whole lower abdomen feel funny… It struggled to balance fucking into Ezekiel and pressing back against Aethriel’s fingers. They both felt so good!
Aethriel adjusted the position of its hand and put another finger in once it was pretty sure Edon had adjusted to the first; it was kind of hard to tell, as the Throne was just babbling horny nonsense and not responding very understably to much of the speech directed at it. After a while, the Throne could barely tell which way was even up anymore. All it could think about was this shower and these two beings that were in here with it.
“You still want to be bitten?” Ezekiel asked, sensing the poor thing was close.
“Yes, y-yes!” It managed to say, and the Seraph and Ezekiel locked eyes for a second. They each picked a shoulder and bit. Hard. Aethriel a lot harder than Ezekiel, but still. Aethriel pressed its fingers directly into the Throne’s prostate, too, just for good measure.
Edon came instantly, rutting into the human it was holding up with fervor and holding his hips as close to its as it possibly could.
“F-FUCK!” It moaned, spilling rope after rope into his pussy, digging its nails into his hips, and desperately trying not to slip on the floor. The feeling of being bitten like that while so pent up and so desperate and balls deep in warm pussy was far too much for it to handle without cumming.
It continued to try its best to thrust into the human as it came down from its peak, much quicker than it normally would in its true form. The two beings let go of it with their teeth, and it pulled out of Ezekiel, watching its cum drip out of him for a second before putting him down.
“Fuck. I need to sit down,” it said, dropping down to the bench in the shower. It reached out its arms and beckoned for the two to come over and get closer to it. “Come here. Please kiss me. Both of you.” They looked at each other and laughed.
“You did not even make him cum!” Aethriel teased, coming to sit with it on the bench.
“What do you want from me?!” It asked, “I did my best!!!” Ezekiel came to join the two angels after he washed the cum off of his pussy and thighs and angled the showerhead to aim more directly at the ledge.
“You did really good, Edon,” He said, “We’ll have another round later after you get some fuckin’ rest…” He gave it a soft kiss while Aethriel rolled its eyes.
“You ARE such a dog…”

+++

One day passed, and then another, with no word from Tahir. What could I have missed?!?! Thought the Cherub, I have fingered and tongue fucked other Virtues to start THEIR heat cycles, I did not think I would need to actually penetrate him to start his! It simply had too much pent up energy to stay in its office while it waited for him, instead pacing the Archives relentlessly, searching up and down the rows and countless rows of bookshelves in search of the pretty little thing.
No Tahir, at least, not anywhere Arseni looked. DAMN! Where could he be?!? Could he really not yet be in heat?! It thought, beginning to worry. What if he turned me in?! What if he was just fucking me to gather evidence?? It stopped in its tracks when it had another, somehow more upsetting thought. What if he’s fucking another Cherub?! WHAT IF IT’S RAPHAEL?!
Arseni raged at the very thought. First of all was the fact that most of the Cherubim in the heavenly sex and kink scene were VERY jealous and territorial over their playthings. A good deal of sexually active Cherubim kept harems of sorts: small groups of their special favorites, which they tended to pay special attention to and have sex with more often. This came with the benefit of elevated social status for both involved parties (the lower angel gets to network with the higher ups, and in the underground scene, well. Having a pretty little angel wrapped around your finger makes you look really good.) Some of the gentler, more lovey Cherubs even gave gifts. Arseni was definitely on the extreme end of “one of those lovey ones;” it adored its playthings, and had cried more than a few times over the fact that it couldn’t give any overly obvious gifts if it wanted to stay discreet. Watching fuckass rich humans gift their lovers land and cars and diamonds made it very envious. In another life, it would have been the world’s greatest sugar mommy.
Most of these “harems” consisted of lower angels: Virtues, Principalities, Dominions, Powers, and Messenger and Guardian Angels, although the occasional very lucky or very influential Cherub could pull a Throne, a lesser Cherub, or even a Seraph, although that was widely considered to be playing with fire. Regardless of choir, the Cherubim were jealous over them, and multiple high profile fellings involved physical fighting between Cherubim over what could be described as “harem disputes.” Fucking another Cherub’s favorite angel could get a weaker Cherub beat to a pulp or, at worst, publicly outed as a corrupt angel and felled.
Tahir was definitely an angel that Arseni wanted to keep close. Its little group of regular playthings was looking a little small these days anyway; a Cherub of its prestige could be expected to have three or four of them, and Arseni could only really currently claim two: a charming pair of Virtue Academy new graduates that had a thing for face sitting, but were really more interested in fucking each other than Arseni. It supposed they were probably still motivated to take its calls because it always had wine on hand, and it made sure to show them one hell of a good time when they did come around. Lana and Fria were making themselves… scarce, recently, and now that Arseni thought harder about it, it was starting to think that may be their way of signaling that they were done with this whole fling they had going on. It highly doubted either Lana or Fria were going to make themselves available for its next rut, anyway, which would be…it checked its calendar… Any day now, if not already. Great... just in time for the fucking busiest time of the goddamn month…
Second of all was the knowledge Arseni held involving Raphael specifically: he did not usually stumble into the beds of Virtues, but when he did, it was not ever a pretty scene. He was known to be destructively rough and violent, and care little for their limits or their consent. He seemed to consider the act a righteous punishment for his partner, rather than an act of mutual pleasure, and was known to engage in non-consensual acts of strangulation, immobilization via binding, halo related edge play, and forced branding. Arseni did not exactly want Tahir to experience this, especially considering many of his “partners” end up felled, after he claims they were engaging in sexual immorality and turns them in to the Council or to God, or just throws them down to Hell himself...
Once, a very sweet guardian angel had come to Arseni for help after being gravely injured by the Archangel, and it had tried its best to help him by giving him a place to hide at the very least, along with as much comfort and healing as it had been able to provide. Despite Arseni’s warnings not to, the angel came running right back to him when Raphael started asking around about where the angel had gone. Raphael evidently became frustrated that the angel did not return to him in a “usable state” (his words, not Arseni’s,) and within the month, the lower angel fell. Sexual immorality and idleness, indicted by his Dominion and Raphael himself, it was an open and shut case. Arseni could say nothing without falling too. It considered saying something. It truly did. But after Raphael called Arseni into a personal meeting, it was very glad it had kept its mouth shut.
“It is simple,” He’d said, “If you encroach on my territory again, even a minor inconsequential offense, I will kill you.”
“Understood.” It replied, heads down, eyes closed.
“I am not exaggerating, Arseni. You even think about touching a single feather on the wings of any of my angels, and I will personally rip your heads from your body and throw you into the pit. You would already be rotting in hell if you had defiled that pathetic thing. You are lucky you have the restraint that you do.”
“I can tell you with certainty, your grace, that I had no intention or desire to defile your angel.” It had said, truthfully, for once. “I did not even one time look upon him with lust. You could search my thoughts here and now for confirmation.”
“It is abhorrent that you believe that your dick matters to me,” The Archangel replied, “Telling him those horrific lies about his retained purity, putting your hands on him simply because he requested it, attempting to modify and erase marks I left on him? You are stupid. You are truly stupid. I will not lie, I considered very strongly the possibility of killing you here and now. With our… HISTORY, shall we say, you should be grateful that I am willing to be merciful, and that your powers are so weak.”
“Yes, your grace.” Arseni replied, unsure of what else to say, mostly just wanting to make it out of this alive. “I will not even think of speaking to or acknowledging the angels, um, in your… your… rotation. I am truly repentant, I will not cross you again.”
“Leave this place now.” He had commanded, and Arseni got up and left as fast as it possibly could.
Suffice to say, there were multiple reasons Arseni did not want Tahir interacting with Raphael. The Archangel had been correct about only one thing, though: Arseni was a little stupid, or at least, Arseni had enough balls (and demonic/angelic underworld ties) that it was willing to confront and challenge an Archangel if it involved its playthings’ safety. Its mind was also not the clearest at the moment, as it may or may not have been miscalculating when its rut was actually set to start.
The Cherub headed straight for his office, hyping itself up in its mind. I will storm in there, and I will END that rapist piece of shit, I will tear HIS heads off, and they will have FUN with that bastard in the pit! I am DONE with him FUCKING with ME!! It got a few long strides down the hall before its fear of certain death got the better of it… and before it remembered that the fucking Sexual Immorality Council Meeting was today. Shit. Okay. That’s probably where Tahir was, then.
Wait. Am I supposed to be at that meeting?! FUCK! It rushed to gather its clipboard and a few documents before rushing off, slipping through the doors of the meeting place just in time for them to close and lock.

Tahir had never felt this uncomfortable in his entire life. Just as Arseni had predicted in the letter, his heat had started up after that sexual experience, at the stroke of the 12 hour mark post-fuck. Right now, sitting under those bright lights on his high up seat, with a whole audience in front of him, he felt hot. He felt trapped in his loose clothing. He was so aroused he could barely think. He scanned the audience for any sign of Arseni; nothing. FUCK.
It had started slowly, and ramped up dramatically ever since. Just the smallest urge to touch himself while he was reading the details of a case (about a Dominion fucking a few of its underling angels) became something almost unbearable by midway through the piles of documents. He dug his nails into his thigh, in some attempt to quell the urge. That… did not work. At the 16 hour mark, he was already trying to get some friction by squeezing his thighs together, trying to convince himself this didn’t TECHNICALLY count as masturbation. By the 24 hour mark he’d given in and tried actually touching himself, assuming that the shame of doing so would at least be worth it if he could FINALLY cum. But he just… couldn’t. Despite resorting to things he certainly found to be shameful, he was unable to get there, unable to… finish. He collapsed, exhausted, in his chair in shame after realizing he’d just spent over an hour jerking off to this fucking Dominion case. How could he possibly sit up there on the council and vote to convict like he was expected to with a pure heart, now?!?! How could he have done that in this SHARED room???
By 36 hours he was eyeing the sheet of ways to contact Arseni with renewed fervor. What else could he do? He needed help. What had the Cherub said about an appointment?! Please do try to make one? FINE. He'd make one. He attempted to speak with Arseni’s secretary, who politely informed him that the next available was gonna be after the Council Meeting.
“Like, directly after?” He’d asked, hopeful.
“About a day after.” It’d said, trying to be helpful. “Is this very time sensitive?”
“Um…” Tahir said, shifting on his feet. “...A little. It is about an Earth assignment… a lot can happen in a day… I do not want Its Grace to be upset with me.”
“Oh, in that case, I am sure you will be fine to wait another day.” Said the seasoned Dominion in front of him. “Do not worry, Virtue. Arseni is typically very understanding as far as Cherubim go, as long as you are not intentionally wasting its time.” It explained. “Don't tell anyone, but it has quite the soft spot for pretty Virtues like yourself, I guarantee you you will not be reprimanded.”
“O-oh. Um. In that case… do not bother putting me down for an appointment…” He’d responded, feeling his heart sink. “I can likely speak with Its Grace after the conclusion of the council meeting.”
Now, he was at the 48 hour mark. Still no Arseni. He felt tears prick at the corners of his eyes as he heard the slam and lock of the doors to the chamber, signaling the beginning of the meeting. This was going to take at least eight hours, if he was lucky. First came the boring part; official introductions, the Oath, several long prayers, a hymn, guest introductions... Then came the general housekeeping stuff, updates to procedure, blah blah blah, it was SO BORING. Tahir was usually very engaged with this part of things, finding it both interesting and necessary, but all he could think about right now was how desperately he wanted to be sitting in Arseni’s lap, receiving gentle praise as he took its cock inch by inch. FUCK. He could almost feel its gentle hands grip his thighs, its tongue delve into his mouth, its presence surrounding him… He wanted to move, to do something, anything other than just sit here in silence and stillness.
Just as the topic turned to the first case the council was hearing today, Tahir scanned the crowd one last time, desperately searching for his salvation, and… there!! In the very far left, in the back, sat Arseni, who was staring DIRECTLY at him with that LOOK on its face, like it knew exactly what he was thinking about... He locked eyes with Arseni and tried to give the most subtle pleading look that he could.
The Cherub smiled back at him, waving. Oh, I am going to have FUN with this, it thought. He must be suffering up there! I cannot WAIT to have him…
For some reason, the Dominion case was deemed not ready for trial. Apparently, some evidence had surfaced that placed the circumstances of the case into the jurisdiction of a different council, specifically, the Wrath in Heaven council, because apparently there had been a bit more fighting than fucking going on. Tahir hadn’t really read that from the evidence he’d seen, but, not having to listen to testimony including audio recordings of some of the nastiest sex Tahir had ever heard all over again, while in heat, in public, was a relief. To his horror, they instead decided to fill the docket with minor infraction cases, mostly things like Lustful Thoughts, which typically result in punishment via the lash. Tahir had never felt the lash, but he was under the impression that this lash hurt very badly and left relatively permanent marks, but did not do significant permanent bodily damage like the type the Lord used.
Hearing each case come up, hearing each lustful thought read aloud, hearing the angels accused defend themselves or choose the much smarter option of repentance, waiting for the Peers to enter (the punishment was PUBLIC lashes, after all,) then hearing the CRACK of the lash wielded by the Power whose job it was to do this, over and over and over again, was DOING things to Tahir that he did not enjoy. He hated how many of these thoughts HE’D had. He pictured that lash hitting HIS back. He pictured LIKING it. He felt so horribly guilty, so horribly immoral for thinking these things, for continually voting to convict… but what choice did he have?! If he did not vote to convict, HIS morality would be called into question, HE would have to answer to the Council!
One case came up in which a Virtue of Humility had been noticed having a certain AFFINITY for her Cherubim superior. He’d noticed, found it to be an offense to God, and had her thoughts searched. Four lashes for her fantasies of gentle touch and kisses.
Another case; messenger angel that stood there watching a little TOO long when the human he was supposed to deliver a message to was fucking his girlfriend; three lashes for his thoughts of joining in. They’d only caught him because it was like his fifth time “failing to deliver” the goddamn message so he could come back.
Yet another; a Principality attended a government event for the state government she watched over. There was a bit of an afterparty. Here for her opinions on the ass of one of the wait staff in attendance, which she’d then went and talked about for some reason to her superiors, who reported her. Tahir actually voted to acquit on this one, arguing that it could technically be considered envy and therefore outside jurisdiction. He was laughed at, but the punishment was bumped down to only two lashes instead of three.
This was getting excessive. Almost all of these were first time offenses, the punishment designed to humiliate, make an example of, isolate, and discourage, so that the accused would fall in line, and suppress further lustful thoughts. Could this not have simply been a warning?! He found himself thinking. GOD, I just want this to end so I can get railed within an inch of my life! PLEASE let this be the last one!
Eventually, it was the last one. He bounced his foot under the regal looking table, desperate for the formalities to just END already so he could LEAVE. After what felt like forever, everything was finally over. Meeting adjourned. He was free.
Now to just… stand up. Publicly. And leave. He tried his absolute best to conceal his arousal, hoping beyond hope nobody could see anything, and filed off the raised platform as tactfully as he could. Typically, there was a post-meeting-briefing, but Tahir informed the Head Council Member that he could not attend as he had to speak about an Earth assignment with a
“...Very busy Cherub.” He explained, doing his best to not shift on his feet. “It was difficult to get an appointment, and I must give my updates.”
“Is it Arseni?” The Power asked, folding up the lash ceremonially and putting it in its belt. Tahir’s eyes followed its movements religiously, unable to take his eyes off the holy weapon.
“...Yes, your grace.” He admitted.
“That guy is always so busy. It’s a shock how it never seems to get anything done, with all those appointment slots booked. Well, I commend you for actually getting one.” It remarked. “What, do you have another question? Why are you staring?”
“Um…! Well, I, I was just thinking, what does that lash feel like, you know? I have seen it used many times, but I truly do not know what that type of punishment is like.” He immediately regretted saying that as soon as it left his mouth. Why had he said that?! It was like it was involuntary, like he was losing his ability to censor himself!
“Haha, very funny, Tahir.” It said, “Is that what was distracting you today? You seem off.”
“I just, I am fatigued is all. I spent a good deal of time reviewing the Dominion case, I wanted to make sure I understood all the details before trying it, you know? I stayed up all night…” He tried his best to make that sound believable.
“Well, it is out of our hands now.” Said the Power, “Although, I don’t agree that it should be a wrath case. That Dominion FUCKED, hard, and I feel we all know better than to put it in wrath’s hands. I don’t care about the bruises and bite marks, that shit isn’t fighting, it’s FUCKING. No two angels seriously trying to fight each other are leaving bite marks like that in necks, thighs, wings, and shoulders only.” It complained. Tahir felt like he was going to pass out. I want to be marked like that so fucking badly, He thought, despite desperately trying not to. I want to see marks. I want Its Grace to see that I belong to it, I want the other Cherubim to be jealous. Oh, please, use that lash on me… “You okay?”
“Y-yeah, yes! I’m so sorry, I have to go! I’m about to be late!” He informed it, turning to leave. He left the anteroom as quickly as possible, and almost ran directly into Metabelle, the Cherub who had been sitting directly next to him at the council meeting. The last angel he wanted to see right now. Metabelle was always so pushy, always wanted to talk for way too long, kept fucking with him and TOUCHING him in public, he hated it. It was so annoying, and he felt like her actions made the council take him less seriously.
“Ah, Tahir! Nice to speak with you again,” She said, gently patting him on the head. He usually hated it when she did that, but it kind of felt nice this time in a sickly sweet way, much to his annoyance.
“G-good to speak with you as well. I must go now,” He said, attempting to leave.
“To do what? Aren’t you going to stay for the debriefing? Maybe we could have a talk afterwards.” She offered a knowing smile. A shock of terror pulsed through Tahir’s chest. Does… does she KNOW?! She can’t know!!
“I have a meeting to attend, urgently.” He said, trying to push past her.
“With whom?” She held him at arms’ length by the shoulders, preventing him from getting by.
“Arseni, I have to speak to it about an important Earth assignment… urgently!” He said.
“Ah, Arseni? That lazy asshole? Why bother! I can take your report for it, I am headed to my office anyhow. I can file the exact same paperwork, and that way you will not have to fly all the way to the Archives!”
“I… I can’t! Sorry! I am going to be late!” He said, pushing past her and just… running. He didn’t know what else to do. He felt so mortified for his words and actions, but he was losing control of himself more and more by the minute, and all he could think about was that shower, that desk, those HANDS…
He headed for the hallway that he thought Arseni would most likely be in. Nothing. He ran down another; nothing, turned the corner, nothing, and, tears in his eyes, almost lost, SLAM! He ran right into the wall. Face first. “Oww..” He murmured, whipping his head around when he heard that damn giggling again, knowing it was Arseni before he even saw a hint of its eagle head peering around the corner. The Cherub stepped into the doorway and leaned against it nonchalantly. Of course, it would pick the hallway closest to the fucking exits. But Tahir hadn’t been thinking clearly for at least a day now, and it was only getting worse.
“I was wondering when you’d show up, little dove.” It said, “Good job up there. I could barely even tell you were absolutely on fire for me.”
“Your grace, PLEASE.” Tahir begged, “PLEASE, may we speak privately???”
“Why would we need to do that? There is nobody here.” It looked around. “Nobody sticks around after these things, you know, I once gave a Seraph a handjob in this hallway and nobody gave a flying fuck-”
“SHUT UP! Shut up! Shut your mouth! Can we please, PLEASE speak in your office?!” Tahir begged, unable to stop himself from bending just a bit at the waist. “I-I very much need to speak with you!!!”
“I see that,” It giggled. “And here I was, worried you’d gone off and disobeyed my… Very. Clear. Orders. Silly me,” Its tone had changed from playful, to incredibly serious, to playful again, then back to incredibly serious as it bent down to his eye level. “I was so worried when you did not come see me right away, I thought you might have just given yourself to the first angel you ran into. You haven’t been speaking to or, I don’t know, fornicating with any other Cherubim, have you, little dove?” It questioned.
“N-no, not outside official business! I mean!! There is a Cherub on the Council, but-”
“Oh, I am WELL aware of Metabelle’s proclivities.” It said, cutting him off. “How much interaction have you had with her? How about with Raphael?”
“None, none at all besides what you witnessed today!” He promised, unsure of why exactly it cared. He was well aware of the Cherubim harem situation, but he wasn’t in Arseni’s harem… wait, WAS he?! WAIT!! Was Metabelle AWARE he was in heat this whole time? She was sitting right next to him!! Is that why she’d offered so “kindly” to take the report from his assignment instead of Arseni?! “Um, I did also speak with her after the meeting, but, only briefly.”
“And what did you two lovelies speak of?” Arseni asked, an intensity in its eyes that Tahir had not yet seen despite the calm, collected tone it used.
“...She offered to take my report instead of you. But I said no! I said no three times! I left as soon as she, um, as soon as she let go of me!”
“Where did she touch you?! Are you alright?! She did not hurt you, did she?!” Arseni asked, looking him up and down, folding up its legs to get closer to Tahir’s level.
“O-only on my hair and my shoulders!!! I did not want her to do it, I honestly do not particularly enjoy her company… she can be… hands on, quickly, without much asking first… but it was only for a moment! She did not hurt me!” He reassured it, and Arseni seemed to calm down a bit. Just a bit though.
“Does she do this often?!”
“I… I guess??” He said, not wanting to think about this right now. “Your grace, PLEASE. Your office…? Let us go there…?”
“Hmm… “ It thought aloud, after opening and closing its mouths, like it wanted to make another comment about what he’d said, “I was actually thinking of bringing you back to my rooms. But, of course, if you would prefer the office…”
“Rooms!!!” Tahir chose, “Rooms, please, your rooms, I would prefer your rooms!”
“Oh, beauty!” It seemed uncharacteristically upbeat and a little… dangerous, right now. “Follow me, Tahir. We just have one stop to make.” They left the Halls as discreetly as possible.
Tahir couldn’t help but notice that Arseni was leading him directly to the Hall Offices, and not in fact to the Mansions where its rooms were, but at this point he was following the Cherub like a lost puppy. He didn’t care where they were going as long as Arseni was going to be there with him. They entered through the third floor entrance, and the Cherub led him down an unfamiliar hallway. He barely even noticed or cared, his thoughts consumed by desire and frustration and Why are we here?! Why is this taking so LONG?! When will it finally have mercy on me?! Will it bite me and mark me on my thighs if I ask nicely??? What if I beg? The two divine beings came to a stop outside an office door. Arseni knocked, did not wait for an answer, and opened the door.
“Hello, Metabelle.” It said, putting a hand on Tahir’s shoulder and pushing him through the door as well. “I thought we might stop by and have a little chat.”
“We? It does not seem as though this meeting was the Virtue’s idea.” She commented, spinning around in her desk chair. “I believe he likely would have preferred it to be a one on one with just me.”
“Yes, well, it shocks me that you’d say something like that, considering I have heard some very credible reports informing me that you attempted to hold this poor creature in place, preventing him from attending an appointment with ME on time. Isn’t that right, Tahir?”
“Um…!” He started, “I, your graces, I did not say it like THAT!” He was in no state to be presentable and professional right now, but by God he was trying.
“See? He wants me so bad,” Metabelle said. “Come over here, sit in my lap, Tahir.”
“Absolutely not. That will absolutely NOT be happening,” Arseni said, “That is actually the reasoning for our little chat. Tahir, my dove, would you care to tell me again how it made you feel when this lustful fool held you still like that when you were clearly in a rush?”
“I-I… I would not EVER call you a lustful fool, your grace…!” He said to Metabelle, “Those are NOT my words!”
“See? He loves our little games.” She teased, staring Arseni in the eyes. “His pretty little face goes all red and hot when I play with his hair, he likes being picked up and held, especially in front of others! Arseni, you should really learn to MARK your playthings like I do, often and publicly.”
“NO! No I do NOT like it!” Tahir said, emotional exhaustion not allowing him to sit back and let her say those things, especially not in front of Arseni. “I hate it when you do that! I have told you to stop many times! And you keep doing it!!” He said. “It is annoying at best! The council does not take me seriously when you hold me up like, like a little doll and toy with me in front of them! Just because I am smaller than you and from an inferior choir, you, you think you can just-!” He threw the notes he was holding on the ground in frustration and embarrassment. “My… my deepest apologies, your grace!” He forced himself to say. He covered his face with his hands, and Arseni gently pulled him closer to it for some degree of protection. Arseni gave Metabelle a look, half disdain, half delight.
“Does that answer your questions about how he feels about your little… games?” It asked.
“...Get the fuck out of here, Arseni,” She said, “You should have just TOLD me you were not interested, Tahir!!! Not that garbage ‘please stop, it messes with my image, it’s uncomfortable’ bullshit, how was I supposed to know you didn’t LIKE it?!” She crossed her arms, throwing her heads to the side, and closing the eyes of her lion head that faced the two of them so she did not have to look at them.
“Funny, really seems like he DID tell you.” Said Arseni, “Consider this a warning, by the way. I am NOT above decking you, even on the God forsaken Council floor.”
“What, so, he’s yours now?! When did this happen?!” She asked, standing up from her chair.
“Tahir?” Arseni questioned him, looking down. He partially uncovered his face. “I cannot answer that question for you.”
“What… what question?” He asked, as he’d really been trying to pretend he wasn’t here at all, marinating in the embarrassment and regret of talking to a superior like that. Especially one who he’d have to interact with later.
“Are you mine?” It asked again. Heat flared up in his chest. He was silent for a second, and the blush adorning his cheeks spread down to his collarbones. Yes. YES. FUCK, please, take me, now!
“I- Um…! Yes!” He answered, covering his eyes again. He no longer cared if Metabelle could hear him. Fuck it, he WANTED her to hear him. He wanted her to be jealous. He wanted her to fuck off.
“Does that answer your question?”
“WHATEVER!” She shouted back, “Get the FUCK out of my office, if I wanted to hear you brag about your newest prude ass Virtue fucktoy I’d go to one of your shitty parties!” She sat back down. “And you know FULL well I’d rip your fucking THROATS out if we ever actually fought…”
“Oh, sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of Virtue panties dropping.” It said, gently lifting Tahir off the ground. It pulled his robes to the side gently over his right shoulder. “My dove, would you like it if I bit you?”
“Here?!” he asked, “In front of…?”
“In front of Metabelle, yes,” It clarified. “One of my personal goals is implementing more constructive feedback, and I believe she advised me to start marking my playthings more publicly just now.”
“...” Tahir looked at Arseni, then at Metabelle, noticing how fucking pissed off she looked. It made him feel… powerful. “Yes please.” He said, softly.
“Oh, no, NO, don’t you fucking-” She said, whipping her heads back around just in time for at least three of them to get a VERY good look at Arseni staring her directly in the eyes while it sunk its teeth into his shoulder, “GET OUT!!!” She yelled, trying to drown out the sound of Tahir’s absolutely sinful little moan. The Cherub slowly bit just a tiny bit harder, then released him, taking its damn TIME to softly lap at the area with one of its tongues, savoring the manna.
“Ffffuck…!” Tahir cried, “can we go to your rooms now…? Is the detour over?” He pleaded.
“Does my sweet dove need something more than just my teeth inside him?” Arseni teased, still making full eye contact with the other Cherub, who looked like she was going to kill it. Tahir’s eyes went wide.
“OUTT!!!!” Metabelle continued, pointing to the door. “I am going to OPEN the door! Get OFF each other and GET OUT of my fucking SPACE! I GET IT! He’s off limits! Understood!”
“Yes, yes, we’re leaving,” Arseni waved her off. It set the Virtue down on his shaky legs and opened the door, gently pushing him out the door before it. It stood up fully to close the door behind them, cheekily sticking its ox head between the gap in the door to give Metabelle a wink and one last word of warning; “And don’t fucking kid yourself, Metabelle, you know I’d win if we fought. I think I remember very well how it went last time-”
“OUT!” She crossed the room in only a few strides and slammed the door in its face.

+++

The guards outside the doors to the Mansion in which Arseni’s rooms were contained were easily bribed (with a few tiny plastic bags of white powder) to allow Arseni to bring Tahir into its rooms off the record. Tahir clung to Arseni’s side as they traversed the halls and made their way to the Cherub's rooms.
They were on the sixth floor, at the VERY back corner of the building. Arseni bragged the whole way about how it had worked so hard to soundproof them, how it had brought in all kinds of beautiful things from Earth to decorate them, how they had a wonderful garden view, how it’d modified the shower with new tiling and redid the piping, and how that would be so much more pleasing than the standard ones only really meant for spiritual cleansing. Tahir wasn't listening. He wanted to be out of these clothes. He felt almost physically sick, a feeling it really hadn't had before. His thoughts were consumed by the throbbing pain from the fresh bite mark in his shoulder, and the scene of Arseni picking him up and publicly marking him like that in front of Metabelle. He seriously considered requesting Arseni do that again, with his thighs next time. He thought about that half a blowjob he’d received a few days ago and couldn’t help but picture the much larger Cherub between his legs. FUCK.
It was all so painfully FRUSTRATING. He felt so miserable and only Arseni could fix it. All it would have to do is what it should have done days ago: pound him already!!! He thought about how much Arseni was capable of cumming, thought about how sexy he felt when the other angel had come all over his face and tits. He wondered if the Cherub would be willing to give him multiple loads.
“Are you even listening?” Arseni asked, as they arrived at its door.
“U-Um, yes, your grace!” It replied, fingers still tangled in its fur. It let go of the Cherub with its now pretty sweaty hands and allowed it to go ahead of him to open the door. “You were talking about, um… your… rooms…” he said, as the door opened and he got to take in the sight of them.
The entryway led directly into a sitting area; a collection of various oddly shaped deep royal red and gold couches suitable for any kind of angelic visitor who graced these rooms. They were all situated around a very large central table, which was currently occupied by stacks upon stacks of paperwork, and a very cutesy (but very appropriately sized for the very large angel) pink bong complete with various cute stickers and an almost comically large bag of weed. The room had great floor to ceiling royal red curtains, composed of layer upon layer of intricately pressed fabric and regal gold accents. The walls were cream white marble with intricate pillars coming up from all corners of the room. The pillars did not remain straight, though; they bent with the curved arch of the ceiling and met at the apex of the dome. The ceiling space between looked like the night sky as seen from Earth, complete with accurate constellations and twinkling lights. A crystal chandelier seemed to hang in the air, and soft candles flickered to life as the two entered the room and Arseni locked the door behind them.
“I think I did a good job with the ceiling.” The Cherub continued to boast. “...So, what do YOU think? I could not change this room too much unfortunately, because this one sometimes gets inspected. I do hate the color red, I much prefer pink… I showed real restraint picking up bolts and bolts of this fabric from Earth, because it would look close ENOUGH to those ugly ones that had been in here originally. BUT, I sewed these curtains, I did the gold accents with real gold thread. I had more than one Seraph come and smoke some weed with me in here so I could get the damn constellations right on the ceiling; those crazy assholes know the stars, if nothing else!” Arseni explained, looking very proud of itself. “You can fuck on these couches and it feels just like fucking under the night sky on Earth, I assume! I do not know, I fucked a human Prophet in here once and he said it was similar. Although he’d never really done that before…”
“I-It is beautiful.” He said, cutting off its weird long tangential story. He felt so guilty for not being able to properly articulate how it felt about the decor in here, but tears were actually welling up in its eyes from the desperation it felt. Clothes off, lay down,, let it have its way with me, fuck, this is taking too long!!!!! Arseni frowned.
“You don’t seem too excited.” It said, sounding legitimately disheartened.
“Well I!!! Your grace!!!!” It said, frustratedly, “Your grace, you have been teasing me for hours!!!! You know very well the… S-SITUATION I find myself in and I, I am just so overwhelmed!!!”
“OH! Right! Ah, Tahir, I got so distracted talking about my renovations I almost forgot why we were here!” It said. Tahir’s lie detection was not functioning at full capacity, but that sounded very true. “Oh, you must be burning up! Come here, sweet Virtue, I have you now, we aren’t in public anymore.”
“A-are you finally going to fuck me?” It asked hopefully. Arseni knelt down to lift the smaller angel into its arms. Tahir graciously allowed this, lifting up his arms to make it easier.
“Here?” It stripped off his garments as easily as it had the first time, mindlessly untying them as it carried him further into the residence. “Wouldn’t you like to see my bed first?”
“Y-you have a BED TO YOURSELF?” Tahir asked, absolutely shocked by that statement. Tahir’s singular room was very standard for an angel of his place on the hierarchy; no bigger than a college dorm room, with space only enough for bookshelves, two desks, and a sort of bed looking thing which could fold into the wall when not in use. Only one. Tahir had to share it with his roommate (another Virtue of Chastity,) which usually meant they had to switch off who sleeps when. It was kind of annoying. Tahir’s roommate had slept right through his hours long jerk off session, which was good, because that guy was definitely a narc.
“Well, I do prefer to share it, but, yes.” It said, leading him through an elegant door and into its bedroom.
This looked a lot more like what Tahir was expecting out of Arseni. It was very evident that the Cherub had quite the thing for earthly pleasures.
A few low candles flickered to life to illuminate the area, which had a similar style of curtains and pillars as the first room, but in an entirely different color palette. The pillars and walls remained the same cream colored marble, but the curtains were a bright pink color and absolutely studded with gemstones. Arseni had bookshelves lining the walls that did contain books, but also definitely contained things like lube, weirdly shaped pillows, and devices Tahir had only heard about in his advanced theory classes in the Academy. There were three mismatched but brightly colored chairs situated around a circular table with a mirror for a surface. Arseni had a huge ridiculous ovular yet somehow four poster bed with sheer drapes around it. The bedframe was also a bright pink color, while the drapes were a pretty glow in the dark green. There were tapestries hanging from the ceiling depicting various sex acts.
The room was additionally lit by a few glowing green floating orbs, and a neon sign above the bed that read “PARADISE” in fancy script.
“And we can… we can have sex in the bed???” Tahir clarified, hoping beyond hope the answer was yes.
“Of course we can! Unless you’d prefer somewhere else. We could also have sex in the shower, or on my couches out there, or I can get out some of my… furniture. What would you like?” It asked.
“...The bed please, your grace…” Tahir was getting delirious. He reached out his arms and did little grabby hands towards the bed, which looked SO fucking soft. It had so many beautiful pillows and one of the softest looking blankets the Virtue had ever seen, even if it was fucking zebra print for some reason. “His” bed didn’t have either of those things at all, period. No pillows, no blankets, nothing.
“Bed it is, then. Here, my dove, let’s sit down, I am going to help you feel all better…” Arseni said, sitting down on the bed with the Virtue still very much in its lap. It gently toyed with his hair, massaging his scalp, then moving its hands to his shoulders and wings to rub them. Tahir really did feel like he was in paradise. The Cherub’s hands felt amazing on his too-sensitive skin, he just wanted to melt into the bigger angel. “Now, there are two ways I can do this,” Arseni began, after a good minute or two of the massage. Tahir’s hand had ‘fallen’ into his lap and he was rubbing himself gently and pathetically to the rhythm of Arseni’s movements. Weighing its options, Arseni gently removed his hand from the area and replaced it with its own; toying with his cock expertly with just its fingertips, doing a better job than Tahir could have done while still ensuring it wouldn't be nearly enough stimulation to do anything but have his little cock twitch pitifully and leak precum. Tahir gasped. “Would you prefer to tell me exactly what you need, and I do it for you? Or would you prefer if you could shut off your cute little thoughts and let me take the wheel?”
“Um!!! I want you to have your way with me so bad!!!” He said, quickly and all together. “Please, oh, I have been thinking about this for days… Please, take the wheel, you can have the wheel!” Arseni giggled at him, tracing over his hips, making him shiver and buck his hips up into its hand and moan.
“I must warn you, I am in a very possessive, lovey, bitey mood tonight…” Arseni taunted, tilting his chin up to stare into its lion face. “If you leave the reins to me, I am very likely going to try and put as many loads in your ass as I possibly can. I will warn you, I can go six or seven rounds. You will leave here with more than just that one pretty bite mark. It may hurt to walk the next day for multiple reasons.” It cautioned, letting go of his cock and positioning its hips so he could feel its cock press against his back and ass. He whimpered. “I want to hold you close to me while we lie on our sides, round five of seven, biting and kissing your neck while I fuck you and praise you for taking it so well, and we're all covered up in my nice warm blankets… I am not going to be TOO rough, but oh, I am not going to be gentle. And you are not leaving this bed until I am done with you. Are you okay with that?” The Cherub asked. Tahir’s face was flushed red as he nodded yes a little too aggressively.
“PLEASE.” he managed to say.
“I like that answer,” Arseni replied. It laid him back in bed and took in the sight of him for a moment as it lifted up his legs. “Did you do the training work I asked you to do?”
“Um, the… tutorials? The fisting one?” Tahir asked, “....I, well, I… I might have maybe potentially, um, been too nervous to do my hand,” He confessed. Arseni kept a fairly neutral expression as it lowered its heads, spreading him open with its hands and beginning to eat him out. “aaH! U-um!! Fuck, but, but I, I, when I was in my r-room, fuck, I was reading that case, and taking notes, and my inkwell ran out of ink, and… um, well!! I just. I had. I had some THOUGHTS, and-”
“And you put it up your ass?” It finished the sentence for him, using its human head to eat him out and the ox one to speak. Tahir was still always jarred when Cherubim did that “switching heads” thing.
“...Yes.” He confessed, covering his face with his hands. “I-I was not thinking!! I was just! Desperate!!”
“Was it one of those big inkwells, the round bottom ones?!” It asked, honestly a little impressed. Those things were blunt, not tapered at the tip at all, and did NOT have a flared base. He would have had to put it in starting with the corner and then pop the rest in with an immediate increase in diameter and completely unforgiving material.... This time, it advanced a lot more quickly to putting its tongue in him. He grabbed at the sheets. Arseni tipped his hips just a bit more upwards so that it could get a good look at his cute face with its eagle eyes. He made a little squeaking sound, clapping a hand over his mouth. “Take your hand off your mouth, I want to hear you.”
“...Um, yea- yes! It was one of the c-council inkwells, the fancy glass ones…. FUCK! I will have to give that BACK to them!!!” He covered his eyes again. He felt the Cherub’s astral hands slide a towel underneath his back and ass. It really did not want to have to change these sheets in the middle of their session and it anticipated there being a LOT of cum to clean up.
“Oh, you are fucked!” Arseni readjusted its grip on his thighs, “How did it feel? How did you get it in there? What were you thinking about? What did you use for lube?” It wanted ALL the details.
“I used lamp oil and my fingers and I, um, I TRIED to be patient. I tried to p-pretend it was you, being gentle with me, teasing me open.. um… um, it hurt a LOT while I was putting it in but I was just compelled to continue, I did not care…” Arseni used an astral hand to grab a bottle of oil based lube out of its bedside table drawer. “I, um, I was thinking about us. About you! I was thinking about how I wanted the things in this case to happen to me, with you!” He said.
“It hurt? Why did you continue?”
“...Well, it hurt at FIRST…” He explained, struggling to keep his speech coherent. Arseni was GOOD with its tongue, unbeknownst to Tahir it was intentionally missing his prostate, worried it might make him cum like that. Call it selfish, but it really didn’t want Tahir to cum from anything other than its dick tonight. “Fuck, please, just a little more…! B-but, um, then I got the whole round part in, and then, well, umm!!!! Then it… started feeling really good… I kind of, um. I just. I left it there and I just tried, um… jerking off. But it didn’t work!! I couldn’t cum! I am so bad at this.” He concluded. “I felt so stupid. Even an animal can figure out how to masturbate!!”
“I mean, you ARE in heat. Jerking off while in heat or rut is actually really hard, you have to kind of convince yourself it’s someone else doing it or you aren’t going to get any relief.” It explained, gently touching his prostate just a few times before cruelly pulling its tongue out of him, sitting up, leaving Tahir laying there, legs apart, trembling. It poured some lube over its fingers and began toying with the outside of his entrance with them. “Flip over, get on your hands and knees.”
“How do YOU handle it??” He asked, obeying Arseni’s command. It slipped a finger into him, and when it met little resistance, added another much sooner than their previous session. Tahir was very grateful that it was preparing him at a faster pace this time around. He had the sneaking suspicion that Arseni was going at HIS pace this time, while last time, Arseni was going at the pace it goddamn wanted to, which was to say, painfully, agonizingly slowly. That or it just really wanted to fuck his ass, sooner rather than later. Somehow, the Cherub wasn't hurting him at all despite the fairly large insertion. It all felt nice.
“How do I…? Tahir, my rut lasts nine days and I am usually alone for more than half of it. I ‘handle’ it by cursing Raphael's name and fucking any willing angel, demon, or human that crosses my path.” It said, deliberately ignoring his prostate yet again. It just wanted to stretch him out a little more, one more finger and it could finally fuck his cute little ass… “Listen, Tahir, you know my door is always open. You of all angels should never worry about your heat going unattended, I am ON TOP of that, if nothing else.”
“You left me alone for my first two days!!!” Tahir complained, “You left me burning up and miserable in that council meeting while you just WATCHED!!”
“I specifically instructed you to come see me!!! After hours or as a walk in, OR directly to my rooms, and you didn't come! I was waiting for YOU!” It explained. It added another finger. Tahir spread his legs apart and pushed back against the Cherub’s hands. “Next month you should come as soon as you feel it, the sooner it is relieved the easier it is.”
“...I-!” He cut himself off from whatever witty remark he was about to make when Arseni curled its fingers into his prostate, effectively ending the conversation. “-aHh! Please, I'm ready, please, please fuck me, I don't want to cum on your fingers I want to cum on your cock!!!”
“Are you that close from just one or two thrusts?” Arseni asked, continuing its movements.
“O-one or two??? You have been putting t-things in my ass for the past ten minutes!!” He countered. Arseni pressed a little harder.
“You better not cum from just this, or I won't fuck you at all.” It teased, adding a little more lube. “You have to last for at least another minute.”
“A whole minute?” The Cherub giggled.
“You ARE really sensitive… I hope you don't get overstimulated easily, too, because I am not planning on stopping just because you came when- I mean, if, I fuck your ass. I meant what I said before. Six or seven rounds.”
Tahir was beyond witty responses right now but he was not at all upset with this, and thought in his head, don't threaten me with a good time!
Tahir barely lasted the entire minute. To give him some credit though, Arseni was a real professional, and considering the short duration, it was very comfortable using its little tricks to make that minute feel like an hour. It send a tiny little pulse of electricity through its fingers at the very last second before it pulled them out, which very nearly pushed the Virtue right over the edge.
“FFuck!!!!” Tahir breathed, legs shaking, face down ass up.
“Be patient!” Arseni replied, pouring lube over its cock and Tahir’s ass, before very slowly lining itself up. “Okay, relax for me.” Arseni used a hand to guide itself into him, again very slowly. Tahir tried his best to relax but, Arseni was, again, BIG. Relaxing to take that monster was easier said than done. Eventually it was able to pop the head into him.
“I-is it,, did you get it in?” He asked, trying to just breathe. It didn't really HURT per say but it was a lot of pressure. “I am so sorry, I am too tight, it isn’t going to fit! I should have done more…!”
“Fuck, you’re doing amazing, just breathe.” It instructed, a bit overwhelmed by how tight he was. “It will fit. What did I say about making it fit?” It rocked its hips back and forth to try and ease itself into the smaller angel.
Eventually, it was able to move deeper, then a little deeper, then a little deeper, and eventually Tahir was taking a good sixty percent of its cock, which was way more than Arseni thought he’d be able to on his first try. It only didn’t want to go any deeper than that because it didn’t want to catch him with the spikes at the base. Usually, Arseni was patient. It really was. But it had been an embarrassingly long time since it’d had any angel this tight take this much of its cock and it was struggling to give him the time he needed to adjust to a very large insertion like this. It loomed over him, supporting itself with its hands on either side of the Virtue, staring with half lidded eyes at his cute little waist and the bite mark it had left in his shoulder. It forced itself to keep its hips still and not move, just stay still, let him get his bearings… God it wanted to wreck him so bad.
The little angel felt FULL, and he fucking loved it. HOW could Arseni have held out on him like this?! He moaned softly as he felt Arseni’s astral hands explore him and touch his body, grabbing his ass, feeling up his hips and waist, toying with his chest. Arseni switched to supporting its weight with one hand so it could feel his lower belly bulge from how deep the Cherub was inside him.
“Why aren’t you MOVING?!” Tahir complained, just as Arseni was about to ask him if he was okay, if he was hurting.
“Patience, little Virtue,” It tried to say like IT had any patience left. It began to move, slowly pulling back, then pushing back in. It gauged his reaction: the little angel was practically fucking itself back on it when it pulled out. Okay. Tahir was REALLY testing its patience, here. “H-hey!! I’m trying to be gentle with you!” Taking that reaction as a sign that it was good to go, the Cherub began to finally give Tahir what he wanted. “Ugh, whatever! You seem ready.”
It held his hips up and still and set a moderate but unforgiving pace, finally fucking him for real. Tahir almost wanted to cry. How could something this good be forbidden? he thought, burying his face in the mattress and taking what the much larger angel gave him. It felt better than he’d hoped it would. He’d expected it to hurt, he’d expected to have to be comforted while he adjusted and cried, but Arseni had done a really good job. He felt like he was floating. The bed was so comfortable, Arseni seemed to really care about his pleasure, it was hitting all the right spots, he felt so seen, so loved… Fuck, it was even gently rubbing his lower back with its thumbs while it fucked him. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes.
“H-how the fuck are you THIS tight and yet you take it so well?!” Arseni moaned, bending over the sweet Virtue, losing its composure quite quickly. It could no longer focus on the back massage it had wanted to give him (Virtues go CRAZY for back rubs, especially while getting their backs blown out,) and was now just trying to get more physical contact, pressing its chest to his back and holding him close. “You take it so FUCKING well, God, Tahir, how are you real?!” It praised, “I hope you do not v-value leaving this bed anytime soon, oh, you’re fucking MINE.”
“I-I’m going to cum!” Tahir stated, putting his head in his hands, feelings of pleasure welling up inside him to the point of flowing over.
“Go ahead, it’s alright,” Arseni said, giving him permission just in case he felt like he needed it, “I-I am not going to last either, shit…”
The much larger angel increased its pace, holding his wings and back to its chest and finally giving him what he wanted. It pressed in just a bit deeper, accidentally touching him with the sandpapery top row of fine spikes on its dick as it came. Tahir felt cum flood his insides, warm and thick and there was just so MUCH of it…! It was far too much for the little angel to bear without cumming too.
Tahir’s body squeezed around Arseni as he came hard around its cock, spilling rope after rope of silvery cum all over the towel Arseni had intelligently put down. There was a lot more of it this time than last time, and he felt completely overwhelmed by the pleasure of it all, ears ringing, vision fading at the edges. They both rode out their orgasms together, Arseni gently trying to be a good top and fuck him through it, but, it had its own distractions.
“I’ll have you know,” It stated, panting, “I NEVER cum that fast. This isn’t supposed to happen. It must have been a fluke, come on, Tahir, ready for round two?” It joked, “Let me show you what I can REALLY do.”
“Ffffuck,, nooo, that was PERFECT,” He moaned, wiggling in Arseni’s grip, and the Cherub released him. It pulled out, making sure to do it over the damn towel. Cum leaked out of him slowly, and he turned himself over to look up at Arseni above him. The larger angel laid down on its side, using an arm to turn Tahir towards it so they could lie face to face. “Next time, um. Can we try another position?” He asked. “That one was really nice but, um. I want to be, um… I-I want to be closer to you.” He confessed. He was still not used to talking so freely with Cherubim.
“You are so sweet…” Arseni said, gazing upon his form. It pulled the blankets up and around them both, and greatly enjoyed watching Tahir’s eyelids flutter. He looked so relaxed like this. “Of course we can. Here, my dove, roll over, scoot yourself back…” It pulled him into a hug as he did so, and pressed kisses into his bare shoulder and neck. Tahir could feel it getting hard again, cock pressing between his thighs. It lifted up his top leg and pressed itself against his entrance yet again. “This position is my personal favorite. Well. Maybe it is tied for first place. Either way, just relax in my arms, sweet Virtue. I have you.”
“I like this,” He said, making a soft sound as Arseni penetrated him again and gently pressed inside, getting back to where it was in much less time than before. “I, fuck, I feel so safe, I feel so comfortable, you feel so GOOD…” He sounded like he was gonna cry. Arseni let him speak as he wished as it began to move.
It held him close and went slowly and gently with him, repositioning his thigh to get a better angle, keeping him warm in its arms. It went deep like he was begging for, it licked and kissed and bit his neck and shoulder with two of its heads. It softly praised him over and over again, telling him he was doing so well, taking it so well, how adorable his pretty voice was, how beautiful and precious he was. It gave him a decent amount of pretty new bite marks with two sets of sharp teeth.
Tahir came two more times from the gentle treatment before Arseni came again, filling him up even further. It stayed inserted this time, not letting the poor thing have a break at all (not that he wanted it; Arseni had pulled out less than two inches just to readjust and Tahir had been like, “No, please, don’t pull out yet!!”)
“I trust you understand that this is not even half over,” Arseni commented, giving the Virtue a kiss on the cheek. “You should pace yourself. I said six rounds minimum. You have at least four more loads to take, are you doing okay?” It asked.
“I have never been better,” He replied.
By the time it was done with him, he’d cum more than ten times and was a total wreck. His last three orgasms barely produced any fluid at all. He was exhausted and his ass and thighs and back were covered in cum. He felt sticky and gross, but completely satisfied. He just wanted to go to sleep in this huge, soft, comfortable, warm bed with the Cherub holding him like a plushie. Arseni pulled out and sat up, watching its cum flow out of its sex partner as he just lay there, content and relaxed.
“I could probably go another round, how about you?” It joked, delighting in the soft laughter coming from Tahir, as he turned himself over and tried hard to look unamused. It leaned down and kissed him softly, on the mouth this time. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Chapter Text

“Ezekiel. Are you awake?” Edon asked that night, gently poking him with an astral hand. It was around midnight, Isaiah and Aethriel were already asleep in his room. Ezekiel had kind of taken over the couch, and Edon had been largely relegated to the garage. There were plans in place to put up some kind of padded shelving or something that it could hang itself up on them as kind of a bed, as Edon’s body didn’t really agree with standard beds, and it hated being flat on the ground.
“I am now,” He said, sitting up. “What’s going on?”
“I… I hate to do this to you again…” It poked its fingers together, just like it had seen him do a few nights ago. “But…”
“Edon!!! I have to sleep!” He said. “Can’t you just jerk off or something??”
“I tried that!!” It complained, feeling guilty. “It does not even feel good!”
“That’s because you’re DOING it wrong!” He said, taking off his covers. “You are way too rough with yourself, it’s your penis, you’re trying to make yourself feel good, not choke out a snake!”
“Well how am I supposed to know?” It said, “It is my third day on Earth. I have no idea what anything is, everything is so overwhelming-”
“Okay, okay!” Ezekiel said, “I’m sorry. I… I wanted to teach you anyway. Might as well be now. Turn into a human, sit between my legs.”
“...Do I have to do it as a human?” It asked, having a real urge to knot him. If he hadn’t interrupted, Edon was going to have asked to do that. The memory of its knot popping into place inside Ezekiel routinely made it feel the need to bite something into pieces.
“Yes, I can’t give a Throne a reach around, now, can I?” He said. “This is what I’m offering. Take it or leave it.”
“...Okay… but this better be good…” Edon grumbled. It transformed, looking pretty pissed off, and sat down in front of Ezekiel on the couch. He put a blanket around the both of them to keep them warm as he began his lesson.
“So, first of all, ideally you want to be in a comfortable environment. Make it a good temperature, get cozy, no loud noises and bright lights, unless you're into that, I guess.” Ezekiel said. “Are you warm enough like this? Are you comfortable?” Edon nodded. “Okay, awesome. Now, this isn't required or anything, but it's usually nicer if you have some lube. Lotion works too, or, I guess spit, or olive oil, or something.” He reached over to the table beside the couch and put some lotion in his hands.
“This is a lot of lead up,” Edon complained, crossing its arms.
“Yeah, well, I’m teaching you how to do it the right way.” He said, reaching around and gently holding Edon’s dick in his hand. “So, ideally, you want to also be jerking off TO something, like… the thought of something you find sexy, or an image or video or audio, or text that you think is sexy. I do realize that there probably isn’t THAT much porn out there written in archaic Latin, but, I mean, I’m sure you could find something.”
“How am I going to find any of that?!” Edon asked, incredulous.
“...I don’t know, again, my area of expertise is not ancient Roman erotica.” He began to gently stroke it, softly, up and down, nothing crazy, just to get the Throne fully hard. It did not take long.
“No, I mean, an image, or video? TV never has anything like that on, nothing with real sex anyway.” It complained.
“...Give me my phone.” He said, and Edon sighed and handed it to him. With his free hand, he opened up Reddit and pulled up r/ftmporn. “This is just one example, but there is SO much porn on the internet. I know it’s probably really irresponsible of me to tell you about this, but, I mean. You’re going to find out sooner or later.” It grabbed the phone back and struggled to figure out how to scroll.
“Lord almighty…” He flipped through the first ten images on the subreddit, eye wide. “How much porn is there on the internet?!”
“Endless amounts. I don’t think you could possibly view it all if you tried.”
“...” It scrolled faster.
“DON’T try it. You could actually waste eons. Just. Be normal about porn, please, I don’t need Isaiah yelling at me for getting you addicted.”
“I will not…” It assured him. It picked an image of a guy with easily the biggest T dick Ezekiel had ever seen, at least three times the size of his.
“Holy fuckin’ shit, man, that guy is hung! Okay, okay, I’m sorry. I’m gonna focus on teaching you this, now. You can look at porn while I do, if you want, but you have to pay attention. Can you do that?”
“...I think so.” Edon said.
“So, the key is to just be gentle with yourself. Be nice to it, use gentle, soft strokes. Don’t squeeze so hard, just close your hand around it and… go like this…” He moved his hand up and down the shaft, using a firm but not strong grip. “Then you can experiment and figure out what pace feels best for you. You can go slower, or faster, or-”
“F-faster, please,” It said, shifting its hips. Ezekiel was good at this.
“Okay, good, good, that’s right, listen to your body.” Ezekiel sped up, going a little faster. Edon put the phone down, closing its eye and leaning back into Ezekiel as he touched it. “Hey, keep your eye open! Look at what I’m doing, you gotta do it yourself next time!”
“I-I’m sorry!!” Edon said, opening its eye, trying to pay attention.
“Now, I don’t know about your dick in your other body, but this one has some specific sensitive areas you can try and pay more attention to. You’re circumcised, so, I can’t exactly show you all my little tricks I can do to play with a foreskin. But, I know a lot of people find that their circumcision scar feels really nice when it’s rubbed. Here, let me show you…” He played with the scar tissue, rolling it between his fingertips, tracing over it, tightening his grip around it. Edon made little noises and tried hard to thrust its hips into Ezekiel’s hands as he did this. A bit of precum beaded up at its tip.
“F-fuck, mmh, that, ohh…”
“Yeah, feels good, hmm? See what you’re missing out on when you’re so rough with it? You need to be gentle and patient.” He explained. “Sometimes it’s too much for people, but, I personally really like fucking with this area riiight here…” He said, switching his focus to the frenulum, rubbing it with a finger while he stroked it with the other hand. Edon jolted and gripped the arm of the couch, spreading its legs wider. “Does that feel good?”
“Y-yea, yes,,” It replied, watching what he was doing intently.
“Good, good! Okay, so, you can also try using different hand motions to see what you like better. You can kinda tease the head a little bit…” On the upstroke, he put a little bit of rotation on his hand and caught the head on his palm, smearing precum as he went. Edon REALLY seemed to like that, so he kept going, doing it again and again. “Yeah, see, or you can try this…” He stopped touching it entirely, and switched to making a tight little ring with his thumb and forefinger, pressing it over the head of its cock and gently relaxing the ring to mimic how it feels to penetrate someone. It threw its head back over Ezekiel’s shoulder, mouth open. “This is kind of just teasing, though.”
“Mmmh, yeah, you could say that…!” Edon exclaimed, softly. “Please go back to what you were doing right before-!!”
“You liked it when I played with the head like that?” He asked, doing it again. This time he tightened his grip just a bit on the upstroke, catching the underside of the head just right before sliding the underside of his fingers over the head before the downstroke.
“Yes!!! Please!!” It asked.
“Okay, we’ll go back to that then. Please remember this, for next time, so I don’t have to be involved every time you get horny.” He said. “So, okay, now, once you find what you like, just… keep going. Until you cum. Uh. I’m not going to do it this time, but sometimes people like to stop right before they cum, it’s called edging. Then you can extend how long you’re jerking off, and like. Usually the resulting orgasm feels better. And also sometimes people are into it as a kink.” He explained, speeding up his hand movements.
“I-I’m-! I’m close,” Edon said, and Ezekiel kept the pace, fucking with its scar and occasionally giving a little extra attention to its head as he stroked it.
“Relax, let it happen. Don’t try TOO hard, but like, don’t fight it, either.” He advised. Edon tried to hold a hand over its mouth to silence itself, caring at least a little about Isaiah’s sleep schedule. In a few more strokes, it came, spurt after spurt of cum landing on the couch cushion and the blanket and then all over Ezekiel’s hand. He kept stroking it through its orgasm, rubbing at the junction between its head and shaft until Edon was squirming out of his grip in overstimulation. “And, there you go. That is how you’re SUPPOSED to jerk off.”
“Fuck. That… that was so much nicer than what I was able to do,” It breathed, leaning against him.
“Mhm. I know, I’m pretty good.” Ezekiel bragged. “How are you feeling now? All better?”
“...I am going to go um… uh…” It said, trying to subtly grab Ezekiel’s phone and the lotion bottle. “I, um… I’m… going to sleep now… I feel … tired.” It said.
“Uh huh. Sure. Just clean up after yourself, okay? I should have mentioned that you’re gonna need tissues, too, or like a sock, or something to clean up after yourself with.”
At least it listened to him, grabbing a few tissues from the box on the table and scurrying off to the garage. Okay… maybe that wasn’t a responsible thing to teach it. At least it’s gonna let me sleep through the night, now…
Edon, to its credit, did eventually try to go the fuck to sleep. It did however spend the next few hours scrolling porn subreddits and jerking off. It followed his instructions as best it could, fighting the urge to squeeze so hard and being… gentle. It thought about Ezekiel’s voice telling it what to do, praising it for using good technique, correcting it when it went a bit too fast… Fuck, this felt much better than the last time it had tried to touch itself… it used some of the little tricks the human showed it and tried modifying a few of them to its liking. Nope, still felt better when Ezekiel did it… but… it was sure it would get the hang of it.
It also managed to navigate to the photos app on Ezekiel’s phone and jerk off to some of the nudes he'd taken. Some of them were… very in Edon’s lane. One of him doing some weird double penetration thing with two oddly shaped metal objects particularly caught its eye. Same for another of him naked in the woods bent over a fallen tree, posed to look like he’d accidentally tripped. It REALLY liked the one of him in what appeared to be a gas station bathroom, chest to the floor, pants around his ankles, pussy out… It was like he was begging someone to put a load in him. Edon wanted to be that someone very badly. The best it could do was shoot into another one of the tissues he'd advised it bring with it, cursing the human need for eight hours of sleep…

Chapter Text

Hi! Author speaking. I wanted to give you all an update on this beautiful Sabbath day, but the chapter isn't done yet and Im actually supposed to be going on a date with uh… someone… in about 30 minutes. So. Here's what I got for you.

First of all I want to say that if you message me or comment a question for a character, I am hereby stating that I will do a little in character answer for you. If I get enough of them I'll post a q&a chapter with all the questions and answers and I might even try to do little drawings, if I have the confidence for that. You can ask as many questions as you want. I have no idea how many people will want to engage with this but, please, feel free, this fic has been instrumental in my life for the past few months and I encourage interactions, I read and reply to all your beautiful comments. You guys have no idea the kind of shit that has to happen in a humans brain to write 80k words of angel porn; hint hint it's mental illness and a serious thing for wheels within wheels. This work is far from over. If I stop updating it's probably because I've been arrested or hospitalized.

Or uh, y'know. Smited. He's fucking trying.

Second of all I wanted to share the playlist I've been making over the course of this fic. It is out of order, all the songs are some degree of cringe, but I don't care. Here it is. I will come back and update this chapter adding more songs as I go. I may also make character specific playlists... but... idk. I already feel cringe enough writing what is now 100,000+ words of biblically accurate fanfiction...

Stargazing - Myles Smith
Nasty Dog - Sir Mix-a-Lot
What the Hell - Avril Lavigne
The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy
Criminals - Meghan Trainor
Fire Burning - Sean Kingston
Joyride - Kesha
Take It Off - Kesha
Hotter than Fire - Eric Saade
You Spin Me Round - Dead or Alive
Trustfall - P!nk
Enemy - Imagine Dragons
Demons - Imagine Dragons
Believer - Imagine Dragons
I'm So Sorry - Imagine Dragons
Thunderstruck- Ac/DC
Bottoms Up - Trey Songz
Rock your Body - Justin Timberlake
Gimme Gimme Gimme - Abba
Satisfaction - Benny Benassi
Hot To Go - Chappel Roan
E.T. - Katy Perry
Liar- Camilla Cabello
Teeth- 5 seconds of summer
Na Na Na - My Chemical Romance
Come Dance- Nervo

Live Wire - AC/DC

Timber - Pitbull
Handclap - Fitz and the Tantrums
Judas - Lady Gaga

Chapter Text

At the end of his shift, Isaiah and his fellow paramedic arrived on scene to their last call to see the residence in flames. The fire department was doing its best to extricate people from the building, thankfully nobody was dead (yet.) Three adults had been pulled from the blaze, one with a severely broken left leg, one with severe burns to her arms and face, and another with only minor external injuries. All three had inhaled quite a bit of smoke. Isaiah and Melissa (his partner) took the woman with the most severe burn wounds, as she needed the most immediate medical attention and the other ambulances were just arriving. They transported her to the hospital as quickly as they could, her condition deteriorating fast. Isaiah stepped back and allowed Melissa to give report to the emergency room staff, staying out of the way of the chaos.
“Isaiah.” Someone grabbed his shoulder and he jolted, turning away from the grisly scene in front of him to see a nurse standing behind him. “I’m Ben, from ICU. Can you give me report as well? She will be my patient as soon as she is able to be transported.” He explained. Ben was probably the tallest and heaviest human being that worked at this place. He had to be at least 6 foot 5 and was heavy set, with the build of a guy who would call himself an “endomorph” or whatever and probably lifted big rocks outside for exercise. He definitely had extra padding on top of that, too, and FUCK, if Isaiah hadn’t just been horrifically traumatized out there he probably would have been drooling. He had a THING for dudes built like they were born to kill you in one punch. Ben’s curly black hair stuck out from the back of his scrub cap (which had little drawings of lightning bolts and defibrillators printed on the fabric) and it looked like his hair was shaved on the sides. He had on those dumbass protective eye goggles and gloves, despite not even having touched the patient yet.
“Uhhhh…. Yes! Yeah! Of course! Ben, right? Yeah, of course I can, let me uh, okay, do you have a pen?”
“I am holding one.” He said, sounding amused. “Go ahead. What happened out there? House fire?”
“Yeah, she was pulled from the second story bedroom, severe facial and upper body burns…” He gave his report, and tried to include every detail he could remember. Ben nodded, commenting only on his ‘good use of the defib’, which was weird.
“Seems like you did all you could. Do you know what started the fire?” He asked.
“Uh… no?” Isaiah said. “But uh, people were saying it just happened all at once, real quickly. I guess the fire investigator will have their hands full.” He tried to keep it light.
“It is terrifying, no?” Ben commented, “Something like that could happen to you at any time. Your life snuffed out, like that.” He snapped. Isaiah stared at his hands, which were a bit too big for even the biggest gloves they stocked here. He could see his veins. “And with it, all your dreams, your aspirations, your goals… your… PLANS.”
“Yeah, pretty scary stuff. But uh, y'know, I'm sure worrying about it isn't going to make it any less likely. You just gotta make sure you don’t like, leave the stove on. Get your electrical connections checked and everything… have smoke alarms…”
“Isaiah.” Ben said, pointing to the woman still receiving CPR. “Look at her. That could be you. Your roommates. Your lovers.” He said. “Many… people… want to kill people like you. You have some good plans. Good ideas. And there are many who want to prevent them from coming to fruition.”
“Are you threatening me?!” Isaiah said, taking a step back. “Is… this about the election??”
“No, it’s…” He sighed, “Take this,” the man said, handing Isaiah a circular amulet made from some kind of bronze tinged metal. He produced it from seemingly nowhere. It was on a chain so that it could be worn like a necklace.
“Um. Uh.” Isaiah took the necklace, and examined it more closely. Before he could open it, Ben grabbed his hands and closed them around the object.
“Put it away!” He said, and Isaiah panicked, putting the amulet in his pants pocket. “You need to get out of this town while you still can, before something terrible happens. I am on your side! Do not back down!!”
“What?!” Isaiah asked, confused. The man sighed again, frustrated for a reason Isaiah couldn’t comprehend.
“I’m telling you that we too are protecting you, now, not just the Adversary. Do you understand me?”
“No, not really.” Isaiah said, “I… are you offering to do an electrical wiring inspection in my house?? Is the power company your enemy? What did they do to you?”
“Why do I even bother!” Ben said, stepping back. “I’m just gonna talk to your roommate later. Take the amulet. Don’t open it unless it's an EMERGENCY.” He said, turning to walk away. He stopped, then turned back around again. “Um… also? Here. Take this.” He scribbled down a phone number and handed it to him, “You’re kinda cute, in like, a stupid, wet rat way. Maybe we could get drinks later.”

“You guys are not going to BELIEVE what happened at work today,” Isaiah said, walking through the door and dropping his bag. Ezekiel and Edon were doing some artistic and/or kinky shit with paper and crayons, and Aethriel was attempting to read some of the papers they’d already done whatever it was they were doing to. “What the hell are you guys doing?”
“Making rubbings,” Ezekiel said. “We’re trying to read the text that’s inscribed inside of Edon’s wheels.”
“So far what we have is a lot of text praising God. Very similar to the Seraph songs, a lot of ‘holy, holy, holy.’” Aethriel explained. “Kind of underwhelming, really.”
“Well, my story is way crazier than that!” Isaiah said. “I responded to a call about people injured in a fire. And when I brought my patient to the hospital, there was this super fucking tall huge buff sexy nurse there who asked for report, and then I gave report and he was like, ‘wow pretty crazy this shit can just happen to you at any time. People are trying to kill you and people like you, here, take this for protection, never stop reaching for your goals, you’re gonna do big things’ and then he just fucked right off like nothing happened!” Isaiah pulled the amulet out of his pocket and showed it to the beings in front of him.
“...Isaiah,” Ezekiel said, “I mean this very seriously. Was this ‘huge sexy nurse’ trying to get you to fuck him?” He eyed the sigil on the amulet.
“Uh, well, he offered to take me to get drinks, but we didn’t set a date or anything.” Isaiah said. “Real huge, powerlifter type guy. Kind of like if you were a little taller and actually like, ate food, Aethriel. I love guys like that.” Isaiah mused. “If I hadn’t been so nauseous from the smell of burning flesh I would have been turned on. Not to sexualize nurses or anything.”
“Right. Well. Isaiah, um, I hate to say it buddy, but you’re 0/2 on the whole ‘spotting angels in disguise’ thing.” Ezekiel said, taking the amulet from his hands. “Do you know what this sigil means?” He asked.
“No, but it’s cool, huh?”
“Edon?” Blank stare. “Aethriel?” Another blank stare. “Really??? Both of you? Guys, it’s Baraqiel’s sigil. How do I know about this and you don’t?”
“Who the fuck is Baraqiel?” Isaiah asked.
“Who the fuck is Baraqiel???? Are you kidding me?” Ezekiel said, “Baraquiel is like, one of THE original humanfuckers. You literally own a copy of the book of Enoch, have you never read it?!”
“You mean Baraqijal?” Aethriel said, “Like, the Watcher???”
“Yeah! The Watcher! You get it!” Ezekiel said. “Isaiah, what else did he say???” Isaiah ran through the conversation they’d had as best he could, trying not to leave anything out. Ezekiel gasped. “He mentioned ME!?”
“Yeah, I guess he did??” Isaiah said.
“Well, then, when is he going to come talk to ME?!” Ezekiel asked, upset.
“I don’t know! He just said ‘later’!”
“Give me that phone number!” Ezekiel said. Isaiah sighed and gave it to him. He took it and dialed it immediately, pacing the room.
“Isaiah, wow, you must be REALLY desperate.” The voice on the other end said after picking up.
“I hate to disappoint, but this isn't Isaiah. Sorry about that.” Ezekiel said. “My understanding is that this is Baraqiel I am speaking to?”
“...Ezekiel?” The voice on the other end said, “Oh, yeah, I wanted to talk to you! What is up with your roommate, man? He’s so hot, but he’s SO stupid.”
“I know!” Ezekiel agreed, looking over at Isaiah, who looked pissed, “This isn't even the first time he's made a mistake like this! He almost gave some random angelic narc a blowjob in a bar bathroom once!”
“I heard about that! Listen, all I really wanted to do was check in on you after that fire. But it seems to me like you guys might actually be in the dark about a LOT more than just that. Would that be an accurate statement?” He said. “Like, it seems like Isaiah doesn't even know about ‘Aza and Lucifer's involvement in this. Do you know anything about that?”
“Uhh… no. I don't. I only moved here like a week ago.” Ezekiel said. “But like I'm not new to the ‘weird biblical shit happening to me’ game, it's been happening for YEARS. But more recently I started getting these weird visits from Ophanim when I would go to the river to wash my clothes and shit. They'd come down and be like, ‘HEY YOU FUCKING PERVERT, YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!!!’ and I'd be like, hey man, I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm a sex worker, but like, it seems like you're mad about something different than that. And they'd be like, ‘you know exactly what this is about, you disgusting sinful corruptor of the angelic and pure!!!’ and I'd be like, I don't think I'm the guy you're looking for!!! My clients are for sure not angelic, at least, if they are I had no idea.
Then they'd get really confused and start asking me questions, and I was like well, I don't know what to tell you, I have no answers for you. Can you fucking go away please I'm trying to survive over here. Then they'd switch into a human form and follow me around when I was in public for a few days, just to like, ‘make sure’ I guess. And that's how it went. I mean. I guess the first time it happened I wasn't at the river, I was at work, and I got fucking fired. So… anyway. Then I met these assholes.” He explained. “I really don’t know much else. All Isaiah told me was that one day, he met this Seraph, they had sex, now they live together, then one day a Throne showed up to kill them but they seduced it and now it’s here too.”
“Wow. Okay. Uh. You have a lot for me to catch you up on.” Baraqiel said. “So, first of all, let me just explain to you that Lucifer is aware of you guys’ situation, intimately.”
“Hang on, can I bring the others into this conversation, or do you want this to be private?” Ezekiel asked, eyeing the shocked and confused beings in the room.
“Oh, sure, you can have them listen in. But uh. Maybe after that, we talk in private, yeah?” The demon lord teased.
“Um. Yeah, of course! Guys, you’re gonna want to hear this.” He put Baraqiel on speaker.
“Aethriel, Edon, you are both numbered among demons.” Baraqiel explained.
“WHAT?!” Aethriel replied, dropping its crayons. “But, but I have not physically changed forms at all, not even a little bit!!”
“Yeah, well, being NUMBERED among them doesn’t mean you ARE one. It’s more of an honorary thing until you actually get thrown into the hellfire.”
“What?! Is that going to hurt???!! When will that happen??? What do I do??!?” Aethriel grabbed the phone out of Ezekiel’s hands.
“STOP talking! Okay! I’m getting to it! All I wanted to tell you guys is that Lucifer is aware of your situation, approves of your ideas about starting shit in heaven, and has for a while, and is protecting this house with some serious angel repellant tech, okay?! But in order to do all that, he had to number you among the demons.”
“Then how did I get in?!” Edon asked.
“I was getting to that!!! Stop asking questions, save them for the end!! It has something to do with the fact that you were still marked for destruction in heaven. But either way, that alone proves that it isn’t impassable, and considering it seems like the most recent angel sent down from above to kill you all just torched the first house she seemed to think MIGHT be you guys’, it might be time to get the fuck out of dodge before God almighty up there decides to pull another Sodom and Gommorah on your asses. The spell over the house is more of a spell that makes you blend in and smell less like divine light, it ain’t fireproof. It would take time you don’t have to come up with something stronger, so, you gotta get out. Now.”
“You mean like selling the house?” Isaiah said, not seeming too happy about this idea.
“Sell it?! Are you crazy? You don’t have time to sell it! Did you SEE that lady? Aethriel, you know what it feels like to get smited directly, can you imagine what that shit does to human flesh?” Baraqiel exclaimed. “I say move to a city. Get a fuckass huge apartment, start making your angelic friends pay rent, and build your army there, keep drawing in angels, keep turning them to your side, keep making plans. I really think you guys can start an effective self-felling movement in heaven.”
“All we have so far is the idea.” Aethriel said. “We have spoken at length about what our dreams are, I mean to say, I would love to have more Seraphim realize that God is hurting them. I would love them to realize they are not loved, they are exploited, and make the decision to leave. I would love that for all angels. I am all about love and freedom. But in all honesty, we have mostly just been living our lives and having a lot of sex. We have no actual plan.” The Seraph admitted. “I have been going through a lot. We all have.”
“And that in itself is revolutionary.” Baraqiel explained, “What are you doing except living your existence on your terms, healing from the hurt, enjoying the pleasures of Earth as they were practically designed to be? If God didn’t want you to eat human pussy, why’d he make it taste so fucking good?”
“...You raise a good point.” Edon said.
“I can’t take credit for that one. That’s one of those things Azazel said a few thousand years ago that I just can’t get out of my brain. I really hope Azazel gets his head out of his ass and warms up to you freaks, I think you’d really like him.” Baraqiel said. “He’s still of the opinion that you shouldn’t try to fuck with Heaven because the margin of error is just too slim, and the punishment if you fail is really, really bad. We had to put a lot of work into Hell to make it as nice as it is, and we’re still dodging God and his posse. ‘Aza, I mean, Samyaza is down with you though. He actually brought you guys to my attention, I figured I’d come check on you, plus let you know that the ORIGINAL Watchers have your back.”
“Great. Good to know.” Ezekiel said, placing his fingers on the bridge of his nose. “Okay, so, to reiterate. We need to move, like, right now. We don’t have time to sell the house. Lucifer is protecting us from being found, but the spell or whatever isn’t smite-proof and he didn’t expect hellfire this quickly. Also the Watchers, as in like, the Genesis 6:4 Watchers, approve of us too. At least most of them. Is that basically what you wanted to tell us?”
“Yes. Good summary.” Baraqiel said. “That amulet, by the way, summons me if you open it. Please don’t fucking open it unless you’re about to die, or, like, unless you’re at a REALLY cool orgy. I really don’t feel like beating people up for you, but I will if it preserves the once in a millenia chance of getting to kill God, or at least free Hell.”
“Wait, is that the GOAL?” Edon exclaimed.
“I mean…” Baraqiel sighed. “Yes. Of course it is. Do you even understand how much harm that asshole has caused? My WIFE, my CHILDREN, were slaughtered and burned in front of my eyes. The same thing happened to all the other Watchers. And that’s just counting my personal experience with it, not any of the other pain and suffering, divine punishment, smiting… it has to stop. It’s gotta fucking stop. I’m not going to go into what exactly His bullshit is doing on Earth right now, because… just trust me you aren’t ready for that. And it really doesn’t matter, either, just. Just keep doing what you’re doing! Just do it somewhere safer, where there’s millions of humans around and you’re a much smaller target! You’re gonna figure it out, I’m certain of it.” The demon lord finished.
“...I don’t know.” Isaiah said. “This house is really important to me. I don’t just want to leave it.” He said.
“I hate to break it to you, but, if you stay here, it will be incinerated.” Baraqiel said. “It’ll likely be incinerated regardless of if you stay or go. There’s nothing I can do to stop that. Indirect occult blessings only go so far, and eventually, more than just God’s shittiest Cherub is gonna be on your asses. You guys are incredibly lucky He didn’t exactly pull out the A team on you, once the Archangels get involved you’re gonna have some REAL problems. And they WILL get involved, they always do.”
“Uriel was always so kind to me…” Aethriel commented, “Maybe he would… defend us, a little bit??”
“Oh, buddy, you dodged a bullet!” Baraqiel says, and there’s a loud alarm sound going off in the background. “Uriel… I mean… he’s not the WORST, but just, like, understand that Archangels are NOT the guys you want to get involved with. ESPECIALLY not fucking Raphael. That guy… that guy fucking sucks. I’m not sorry. Raphael can go FUCK himself with a chainsaw for all I care.”
“What’d he do?” Isaiah asked.
“Well, for one, he beat the shit out of Azazel back in the day. But he’s also a fucking rapist. As in like, holy-fucking-shit-man-what-is-WRONG-with-you type rapist. You know about BTK?”
“That serial killer from Kansas?” Isaiah said.
“Yeah, that guy. Raphael makes BTK look vanilla, and he TRULY believes what he’s doing is right. It’s really fucked up honestly. He doesn’t give a shit, I’ve heard he locks lower angels in tiny chests and starves other Cherubs of divine light in this fucked up torture chamber to make it so they’re too weak to fight him off, it’s sick shit, man. He rolls with Kushiel and the other punishment angels hard, real dickriding behavior. Oh, also, I mean. Goes without saying but, steer clear of the guys whose job it is to punish us in Hell. I mean, we are always having to fight those guys off, it sucks.”
“That… is disturbing.” Edon replied. More loud alarm sounds started going off in the background of the call.
“Look, I gotta go. Ezekiel, stay on the line a sec, but like, go outside.” Baraqiel said, and Ezekiel looked at the others, shrugging. He took the phone off speaker and went outside.
“Okay, I’m alone. What did you want to say?” Ezekiel said.
“I wanted to ask, I mean, I kind of know what you look like, I saw you at the store a few days ago. But… I’m interested. Can you send me a pic with less clothes on?” He asked. Ezekiel felt his face get hot.
“Um! I mean! I can…? How much is less?”
“None, preferably.”
“What body part?”
“All of it.”
“I… I am absolutely flattered,” Ezekiel said, “But, honestly??? I am gonna tell you now that um. Well. You’re gonna be really underwhelmed, and I don’t know if I can take that hit to my ego.” He explained. “How about, uh, how about I send you just some regular carefully curated choice nudes??”
“You don’t have to say yes.” The demon said, pretending like he hadn't seen Ezekiel’s onlyfans.
“No, I’m saying yes! I’m just warning you.” He said.
“Okay, I actually have to go now.” The alarm sounds were getting louder. “Send nudes. Original ones. I’ll uh. I’ll let you know what I think.”
“O-okay.” Ezekiel said.
“Oh, also, tell Isaiah the same thing!” He said, “Also, once you guys find a new place, CALL ME. I will help you set up a better protection spell, I’ll bring Lucifer and ‘Aza and a few other cool dudes. Okay, bye.” The line went dead.

It was a struggle to convince Isaiah to leave this house behind, but within a few hours, he saw reason. On the news, they saw that yet another weird unexplained house fire had happened nearby. And then another. Two people were already dead, including Isaiah’s patient and another woman who was unlucky enough to get caught up in all this. Both were only in their mid to late 30s.
“Which city??” Isaiah finally asked. “I can't fucking afford to live in a city…”
“But we can.” Aethriel said. “You are forgetting that I have powers. I can just steal.”
“You can't steal shelter,” Isaiah said, “And I'd have to leave my job. I like my coworkers.”
“I do not want to live in such a crowded place,” Edon said, “Humans make me nervous.”
“We should at least TRY to sell the house!” Isaiah insisted, “This is all I have in the world. I will leave with absolutely nothing except the clothes on my back and what I can fit in my truck.”
“And my minivan.”
“And we can carry some of it, too.” Aethriel said, volunteering Edon as it tried to remove a piece of paper that was stuck to itself.
“But where are we going to physically go??? My credit is absolute shit. Ezekiel, yours can't be much better. You're homeless, I'm broke, and I like loud sex way too much to have a shitty studio apartment for four beings.”
“Why do we not just lie?” Aethriel said.
“You can't lie, they look you up!”
“How would they look ME up?”
“That would be even more suspicious!”
“Isaiah. Calm yourself.” Aethriel said. “I really think I can handle this. I have temporarily lived in many cities.” It assured him.
“Yeah, like, six hundred years ago!”
“The time does not matter! And now that I know I can look like a human it will be much easier. How about you just relax and leave me to it?”
“I don't know!! This is… this is a LOT!” Isaiah said, panicking. “No offense but I don't know how much I trust you with this! This is… this is my first time being STABLE, and I don't want to throw it all away. This was my fucking uncle's house. And now it's mine. And. And…!” He started to cry. “You're sitting here and telling me I can just RELAX while my whole life falls apart, I come home off a 24 hour shift to hear I need to flee home or die in a fire…???”
“I… I know.” Aethriel said, trying to comfort him, “but I really am confident I can set this up for us. Give me a day or two and I will have a place for us to stay. It… it will be private, it will be big, it will be affordable. I will pick a nice city that we can drive to easily from here.”
“The nearest city is like a five or six hour drive!” Isaiah reminded it. “I… I mean… I'm gonna have to quit my job, like, now. I'm gonna have to pray that I can get hired again, for a CITY EMS job. I'm gonna-”
“You can tell us all the things you're going to have to do, but burning alive isn't one of them.” Ezekiel said. “We need to do this.”
“Shut the fuck up! You showed up here a week ago, and you too, yeah, I'm talking to you, Edon! Neither of you assholes have any stake in this at all! I'm losing my fucking house!”
“Yeah, feels fuckin shitty, doesn't it!!!” Ezekiel yelled back. “You’re the only one of us that this hasn't happened to yet! It's technically happening to Aethriel for the second time in six months! And I'm pretty fucking sure the Seraph can handle a little real estate! I vote we leave, ASAP, like, stay in a hotel room tonight, and leave in the morning.”
“I have EVERY right to be fucking upset about this!” Isaiah shouted back, “Shut the FUCK up and get OUT! Get the FUCK out of my house!”
“Ezekiel!! Isaiah!!! Do not yell at one another!!” Aethriel interceded, but he was not in the mood to hear any wisdom right now.
“You too! Get the fuck out!” Edon purposely shifted its gaze to be anywhere but Isaiah, but that was pretty damn obvious and just pissed him off more. “YOU TOO!!! EVERYONE GET THE FUCK OUT!!!”

Ezekiel and the two angels sat in silence in his minivan, driving down the country road in the dark. Aethriel cried softly and held its favorite blanket around itself as Ezekiel pulled up to another random motel.
“Alright, um… let's hope this one has a vacancy.” Ezekiel said, getting out. They entered the motel lobby and walked up to the desk. Edon rung the bell, and a few seconds later, some guy came to the desk. He stopped when he saw them in their ill fitting clothes, Aethriel wrapped in a blanket, Edon without shoes.
“We're full.” He said, after looking them up and down.
“Oh, come on!!! You didn’t even have a sign! This is like the fourth-” Ezekiel said, before Aethriel cut him off.
“We are here to visit someone. Room 211, last name Birch.” It said. The dude behind the desk looked at them skeptically and flipped through the book the motel used to keep track of guests. His eyes widened when he saw that it was accurate.
“I refuse to believe you just knew that,” he said, “You three are clearly just here to do drugs or sell drugs or buy drugs, or do SOMETHING with drugs, and I'm not about to just let you dirty fags upstairs and get myself fired. I don't care who you know. You're not getting in.” The guy said. “Now leave, before I call the cops.”
Ezekiel sighed and turned to leave, muttering something under his breath.
“Come on guys.” He said.
“ No. Absolutely not,” Aethriel said, stepping closer to the desk. “How dare you deny us entry to this place on the basis of appearance?”
“Aethriel, let's go.” Ezekiel said. “This is a battle you are not going to win today.”
“You are a liar and a hypocrite, and everyone knows you are cheating on your wife, and your son does not respect you!”
“I’m calling the cops.” The guy said, and Edon grabbed Aethriel and pulled it out the door. They all sat together in the car again in silence for a minute.
“Why did you say he was cheating on his wife?” Ezekiel asked, head resting on the steering wheel.
“It is true.” It said. Ezekiel sighed, and Aethriel buckled its seatbelt. He almost said something about that, but decided it wasn’t worth the effort.
“Yeah well… okay. Whatever. You guys wanna try another motel, or… are we ready to do this my way?”
“I vote for Ezekiel’s way.” Edon said. “I do not like how the motel lights flicker. And we do not have a lot of money.”
“We should NOT have to sleep outside!” Aethriel replied.
“Should is a strong word. Aethriel, you've been outvoted. Let's go find a place off the side of the road, preferably near a river.” Ezekiel said, starting the car.
“It is going to be so cold tonight!!!” Aethriel argued.
“Yeah, well, you're a divine being, I'm sure you'll live. And you can keep me warm, too, I'm sure you can modify your body temperature.” Ezekiel said. “You'll be like the world's most overcomplicated space heater.”
“You do not even have anything in this car to keep warm?!” The Seraph asked, cataloging the interior and finding that no, he really didn't, except for a few blankets.
“Yeah because I don't want to die of carbon monoxide poisoning.” He explained. He pulled off to the side of the road in a location that looked like it might be a trailhead or something, although there were no signs. He could see the river below in the light of the full moon. He checked his phone: it was only like 10 pm. He sighed and turned the car off. “So, uh… yeah. Not gonna lie this is a new low for me, usually motels let me in when I had money. I'm glad to know I look even more fucked up now.” He said.
“It is the people who run these places!” Aethriel said, “Every one of them called us…” It struggled to use the words.
“Fags or trannies. Yeah. We look gay as hell and this is Trump country.” Ezekiel finished. “FUCK, if only I could fucking VOTE. I know you guys probably don't understand this but Trump is going to fucking RUIN us, not like Harris is much better...”
“Your vote would have done nothing,” Edon said, “You are aware the US elections are essentially meaningless, right?” It pulled off the hoodie that Ezekiel had let it borrow to try and fold it into a pillow.
“...Like… in what way??” Ezekiel said. “Do you mean literally fake?”
“I mean pointless, they do not work ANYTHING like you humans think they do.”
“...Are… are current human politics like… common knowledge in Heaven now?!” Ezekiel asked, incredulous. He moved his seat back to have more space and turned so that the three of them could talk to one another more easily.
“Since when have they not been?” The Throne responded, “Besides, I was the personal Throne of Arseni, I have never met another Cherub that cared more about human politics, it was always talking about whatever thing was happening in your God forsaken country.”
“YOU were ARSENI’S Throne?!” Aethriel questioned.
“WAIT! What presidential candidate does God favor?!?!” Ezekiel followed up, “And who the fuck is Arseni?”
“That is too many questions at once!” Edon said, holding out its hands. “Yes, I was Arseni’s Throne! Not for that LONG, but I was! Arseni is… a… I mean… It is some Cherub.”
“”SOME” Cherub is an understatement!!!” Aethriel explained, “Arseni is one of Raphael’s personal Cherubim! It is a big deal! Why did it pick you?!!?!?”
“I was a mercy pick.” Edon admitted, grumbling. “It picked me up after my eye was removed and my old Cherub requested a new Throne, Metabelle is on the Sexual Immorality Council, she could not be seen with me after… after what happened.”
“Did she vote to convict you? Was that not a conflict of interest?” Aethriel wrapped its blanket around its head, settling in to hear Edon’s tale.
“What are either of you guys talking about?? I feel like I’m in a fever dream.” Ezekiel said.
“Just ask me to tell you the ENTIRE story, why don't you??!?!” It asked rhetorically, and they both looked at it with interest.
“I believe we are both very interested.” Aethriel said. Edon sighed.
“Fine… okay… um… So… about forty or fifty years ago… I went to the Mandatory All Ophanim Council Meeting and Celebration like I was required to. It was not THAT unheard of to see Seraphim there, I mean, some of them have no choice! But this one Seraph went out of his way to speak to me. He came to me and complemented my… um. My eyes. And I had some… very, very lustful thoughts about that Seraph, I got… carried away… honestly… This story is so embarrassing!!!” It cut itself off, putting its head in its hands. Ezekiel placed a hand on its shoulder and it flinched away from him.
“I’m sorry, Edon,” Ezekiel said, “But you should know that we aren’t going to judge you, really.”
“You should not make that promise NOW.” It said, “I did something very… weird!”
“I really doubt that.” Ezekiel said.
“Oh?!” The Throne countered, “My thoughts were so lustful that he must have had no CHOICE but to read them. Because he cornered me later, and asked me if I wanted to dance. I was so stupid, I was so naive, I said yes. How could I have said yes?! Of COURSE it was a ruse, of COURSE, I am a Throne, I am not even an ATTRACTIVE Throne, how could I delude myself into believing he held any interest in ME?” Edon said, tears pricking at the corner of its eye. “All I was thinking about were his pretty wings and those teeth, those TEETH, this Seraph must have had six rows of them!!! And when the lights were dim and the music was loud, he shoved me into the wall behind a pillar and he… um… uh…” Aethriel and Ezekiel looked intently at Edon. “He… um…”
“Oh, Edon…” Aethriel began, trailing off. It was trying to say ‘you do not have to tell us if you do not want to,’ but it could not find the words before the Throne continued,
“He fucking, I do not know!! He shoved a hand into the center of me and did THINGS to me until… you know!!! I came! And it hurt and I begged him to stop and to let me go and he pretended like he could not hear me over the music but I KNOW he could, I just could not be any louder or I would draw even MORE attention to myself, this happened in a crowded area!!!” It said, tears beginning to stream down its face. “So of course angels SAW. And I was physically dragged in chains in front of the Council almost immediately, within the day I was on the stand! And I was supposed to defend myself, or have some sort of plea!!! The Council was like, ‘the Seraph was clearly punishing you for your horrifically deviant thoughts and yet you continued to lust, you are a particularly difficult case and you will be permanently marked as a deviant, you will have an eye plucked out for lusting and we are considering a felling.’ My old Cherub, Metabelle, voted to convict me immediately, along with her annoying little sycophant we met at that bar, Tahir, or whatever his name was…
I never ASKED for any of this! But on the stand I could not deny my own thoughts, not honestly! I DID think those things about that Seraph biting me and pulling me apart, he DID arouse me…! I… I cannot even to this day tell you that I have not thought about him and been aroused along with my feelings of fear and disgust!
And so I stood there and said that I was sorry, but I did not know what for! And I stood there and had to tell the council some… some SHIT about how ‘I did think those things, yes, I admit, I am repentant, but I did not want or ask for this to happen!! I did not want to be touched in that way, I fought back, I begged him to stop! And they told me I was wrong! They said that it made no sense how I could not want it when I had thought those things, that I was LYING to them! But I could not be more honest than that. It was. SO. Confusing. I was… terrified.
But… um… then after… uh… after my eye was pulled out… I was out of a job… I was fully prepared to be untrued and repurposed into like… some shitty decor for the Archives art display, or something, and then I heard word that Arseni’s Throne got promoted and it suddenly had no Throne…” It looked over at the others for some sort of reaction. They were both just listening intently. It sighed again. “So… before anything could be decided, while I was just turned loose to bleed out of my eye socket all over heaven, I guess, I thought, why not? I went to its office unannounced and in tears.
I told it that I had been removed from Metabelle’s service, and I believe the Cherub was quite desperate for someone to do all the paperwork its old Throne had left behind, so, out of convenience I was chosen. It wanted me out of that office, that is for sure, it signed the paperwork I asked it to and rushed me out the door. Maybe I just bothered it so much it would rather put me to work… It told me to come back with all the paperwork done and to bring back gossip about Metabelle, I guess they are rivals…? And then I left and I raced back to my space on the shelf, and-”
“Shelf??” Ezekiel asked, “I mean, I have a lot of other follow up questions too but I'm saving those for the end.”
“It is where most of the Ophanim sleep! We are essentially packed away in a case, but there is like, a fold out desk, too.” Edon explained. “Wheelwork Ophanim almost never get sleep and they have a designated shelf they all share. But I am not a Wheelwork Throne. I am a general duties Throne.
ANYWAY, I went back to my shelf, and I did the paperwork as quickly as I could. When I got back, Arseni barely even remembered it had signed that scroll I gave it to officially make me its Throne, and was actually in the process of interviewing another Throne.
But it was very kind and honored the promise it had made to me. I owe that Cherub my LIFE.” It said. “I got very good at working for it. It did a lot of very niche, uncommon paperwork and I did some scouting missions, I delivered a lot of packages to and from Earth. It was. It was good. Arseni treated me well and we both had a lot to complain about when it came to Metabelle… it did ask me a lot about my eye but. I deflected the questioning as best I could. I didn't want it to find out what a horrible deviant I am.
Then one day Arseni told me I needed to go and scout out your area and find a missing Seraph, the note from God just said something about a ‘rebellious Jezebel being involved ‘ and I was like, that's all the information I have to go off of?! And Arseni was like, I know, right? God must not really care about that Seraph. And uh. The rest is history.” There was a long pause.
“Edon? I am so sorry all of that happened to you.” Ezekiel said. “That is terrible. You were horrifically punished for something completely out of your control and made to think it was somehow your fault. I'm telling you now it is not your fault. And there is no way in hell you're THAT much of a sexual deviant, I mean, to my knowledge you have no desire to have sex with like, animals, or anything, and although you're a little resistant to being told no, you aren't getting off on me not consenting to stuff. So . You're fine there too.”
“Humans are animals.” Edon pointed out.
“You get what I mean! I mean humans can consent, there's not that much of an intelligence gap.”
“...Our intelligence gap is likely greater than that between you and swine.” Edon said, covering its eye in shame.
“Oh, shut the fuck up, I saw you get your hand stuck in a jar of peanut butter once, and I've only known you for a week.” Ezekiel commented. ”Look, the point is, it will take time to heal from this, and I want you to know that neither of us nor Isaiah think this is your fault, and we’re all here to support you. You did literally nothing wrong. You being into pain and biting and …angelic guro, I guess, and getting turned on when someone flirted with you is not grounds for punishment on any reasonable scale. I for one am committed to helping you heal, however you may need that help.” He said, holding out his hand. Edon placed a hand in his. “Also, I think I understand now where your frankly inaccurate views of consent come from. I will teach you about that. I will make it a priority.”
“You DON'T understand,” Edon said, “It was.. I… I still wrestle with the feelings I have about these things that happened. I cannot fully tell you how I feel about losing my eye, even!!! I do not want to say it was an erotic experience by any measure, but. The threats, the violence… Yes, it was horrifying. Yes, it was terrible, but. I. I was. I did not have the most chaste thoughts about it either after the fact!!!!” It explained. “I am actually sexually deviant. I have a… a… fetish, for violent acts. They were right about that.”
“Did you consent to what the Seraph did to you?” Ezekiel asked.
“No!”
“Did you consent to having your eye removed?”
“Of course not!”
“Then it was sexual assault and cruel and unusual punishment respectively.” He explained. “Doesn't matter what kinks you have. And it isn't good or right that your government forcibly removed a part of your body as a punishment for ANYTHING, much less something that should not have resulted in a punishment at all and in fact the perpetrator should have been punished. It doesn't matter what that punishment made you feel, it was still wrong of them to do. Not wrong of YOU, but of THEM.” Edon was silent for a bit. “Also I wouldn't be surprised if some of your kinks were coping mechanisms for dealing with what happened to you. I mean I know you were already into some of it but. Y'know. Don't beat yourself up over it, being kinky is fine. And I mean. We are a space to explore those things safely, if you feel that would be helpful or desirable. If you would not, that is always fine too. You are your own being, I want you to first and foremost understand that your consent about what happens to your body matters and is to be respected.”
“I would like to apologize for reading your thoughts earlier when we were in the shower.” The Seraph said. “That… that was not okay for me to do baseline, and I now know you have a personal bad history with that kind of thing. I likely added to your stress and discomfort and it was not right of me. I will not do that again.” It said.
“It's… okay.” Edon said. “It feels. Good. To talk about this knowing I will not be hurt. But. Um. I want a break from talking about it please.” It said. The human turned around to grab some snacks out of the box in the seat next to Aethriel and handed some to Edon to give it something to do with its hands.
“I can talk a bit about a similar situation that happened to me,” The Seraph said. “I too was punished by God, and I recently started having these… terrible nightmares about the experience. It was very helpful to be close to someone, to be reminded again that I am safe.” It explained. “The circumstances of my punishment were… different. I questioned God directly, that lead to having my wing almost entirely ripped from my body, and other angels no longer wanted to associate with me because they feared punishment by association. It is a big deal when a Seraph questions God.
But um. While I cannot say that I relate directly to the sexual nature of your experiences, I can tell you that I felt my attraction to humans was a result of the punishment and the isolation. I worried that I was going insane. I definitely suppressed those thoughts out of that fear. When I came to earth it was out of a wild desire to see the mountains, to see the rivers, to see the trees again before I died. I did not think any of this would happen. It has been a lot. I realize your introduction to all of this was a lot more recent… that could be playing into your perception as well. It gets better.”
“...Thank you.” Edon said. “I just wish I understood it all. It is all so confusing, I do not understand my emotions, I do not understand my thoughts. I am questioning all I ever knew.”
“I can relate to that, for sure.” Ezekiel said, “Uh, do you guys wanna hear how I got here in this fucked up situation?”
Edon nodded, struggling with the package Ezekiel had given it. Aethriel undid its seatbelt and moved to a closer seat.
“SO, uh… For lack of a better term, I have always had… visions. But, um… over the past few years it’s just gotten exhausting, honestly.
Once I started being more involved in climate activism in college it got bad, I got in a fistfight with a Cherub in a Walmart parking lot over my refusal to start telling people God was responsible for climate change. He fucking ISN’T, it’s fossil fuel emissions, it’s SO stupid, I don’t even know why He wants the credit!!!
This escalated over college and into my career into a daily/ almost daily occurrence that became incompatible with employment. I got fired from the lab I worked at because I incorrectly assumed my new manager was sent by God to collect information on me, and I publicly threatened him when he tried to invite me to a work Christmas party. I tried to hold my life together after that, but my family at that point wasn’t talking to me because of all the shitty things I said and did while I was avoiding being smited… I mean, I deserve it, I stole my sister’s car, I got in screaming matches with my parents over stupid dumb shit, I insulted my grandparents to their faces. I was being a cunt. Only my brother still tolerated me in his life and honestly, he shouldn’t have. He was too kind to me.
God kept showing me shit I did not want to see and I would hear Him telling me He was going to kill people I loved, telling me to kill myself, and other vile shit for days on end until I started summoning demons to protect myself. At one point I was living in a shed outside my brother’s house with a 24/7 demonic guard that I was paying in pussy and homemade moonshine. I left that place to join a commune, got arrested for fighting a cop, got sentenced to jail for two years, and my brother suggested I try seeking religion, and… I fucking did. I tried, at least, I tried to study the scriptures while I was there. I got out when I was 24. Then I thought, well, I know a lot about God, why not try and be a religious leader?
That lasted all of maybe six months. I started studying to potentially become a scholar and work for the church or something, which I probably shouldn’t have done, got thrown into a mental hospital in fucking Reno, got out, then spent what little money I had on a beater car and drove until the tires fell apart in this goddamn mountain range on the other side of the country. I was doing sex work the entire month long road trip to survive and you know what, you know what?! I fucking liked it. I was making money, I was doing my own thing, the angelic bullshit calmed down a little bit, I was OKAY. I got hired at a random gym to work the desk, I wanted to work there because I wanted access to the showers mostly, and then I got fucking FIRED because shit started happening again. I got in another stupid fistfight with an angel in human form, and got hospitalized because it broke my fucking skull, and now I have a seizure disorder, too, so, thank you, piece of shit angel that got me on mistaken identity, you’re really doing God’s fucking work!!!
Then a few more angels came down talking about how they knew me, I'm Isaiah, I'm a horrible person and trying to grab me and drag me up to heaven. But I kept explaining they'd got the wrong guy and they eventually agreed and let me go. It was so weird, weirder than what was happening before.” He said, pausing to drink some water. “But I just kept on doing my thing. Sex work in Appalachia is very different than where I was before in Nevada and California. But it really isn't bad, it's much better than being stalked and harassed and shown horrible visions of my community being decimated all the time. I think God lost track of me.” Ezekiel finished. “Not gonna lie I did NOT like angels until I met you two. All the other angels I know are assholes.”
“That… that is quite the life.” Aethriel commented. “How old are you now?”
“25.”
“You did all of that in 25 years?!” Edon asked.
“Most of that was the last 5-10 years, but yeah.” He said. “My childhood is a whole different story that I will not be getting into right now.”
“So, were the angels you saw when you were here looking for Isaiah?” Aethriel asked.
“I assume so? Yes. I think we probably give off similar vibes, and the second time it happened the angel called me Isaiah.” He said.
“If we had known… we would have taken you in in a heartbeat.” It explained. “It is lucky you found us.”
“Yeah, it… uh.. It really is. I was NOT doing well.” He explained. “Yet somehow I was doing better than I usually am. Crazy.” He thought aloud.
“Well. Um. That was emotionally exhausting,” Edon pointed out. “What now?”
“We have to plan for tomorrow,” Aethriel said, “My plan is to fly out to a city when I wake up, and look for a place we can stay. How is New York doing nowadays?” It asked. “I have not been there since the 1910s.”
“The rent is way too high in NYC.” Ezekiel said. “What… wait… what the fuck were you doing in New York in the 1910s??”
“Triangle shirtwaist factory fire.” It said.
“WHAT?!”
“We do not have time to get into the details of what I did in Heaven, okay?” It said, “Just trust me when I say that low ranking Seraphim are sent out when something kind of big happens that God does not give enough of a shit to actually do anything about.” It grumbled.
“Wait, so, hang on, who did they send to Stonewall?? WAIT! What about 9/11??”
They talked for another hour before Ezekiel got tired and frustrated and wanted to go to sleep. Aethriel tried its best to explain that it literally could not tell him some things, either because it didn’t know the answers or because it was considered ‘forbidden knowledge.’ Whatever the fuck that meant at this point, anyway.

Ezekiel sent Baraqiel some of his yet unreleased nudes. He selected his best ones that weren’t yet public, as the demon HAD requested something original. One of them was him bent over Isaiah’s truck bed, pants pulled around his ankles, hands tied up with zip ties. He’d used the countdown setting on his phone camera to do it, and had originally intended to use this one to tease Edon with before realizing Edon didn’t really have a personal device like a phone or anything, and therefore it was going to be really hard to do that. He did still have a desire to tease the poor Throne, though, and upon selecting this image he felt sad that the house was gone and therefore he wouldn’t have the opportunity to wait in the garage all tied up like that for Edon to find…
He picked another one of himself at the river washing his clothes. This one wasn’t even intended to be sexy; he’d just wanted to document this part of his life. It was serene; it was quiet, and it was warm that day. He was naked in the picture, holding up and trying to wring out a wet shirt to hang up between some trees.
Ezekiel thought those two would probably be good enough, and he sent them, really hoping for some kind of positive reaction, or at least something neutral. He sent them along with a little bit of text, which he’d written and rewritten at least ten times before settling on:

E>There’s more where this came from; also I can give u my OF stuff on the house theres much more on there. Lmk if u have specific requests I do whatever.

He got a text back within ten minutes.

B>> I thought I said original

Embarrassment and nervousness filled his chest for a second, thinking he’d totally fucked his chances with a demon lord from a minor misunderstanding. He texted back right away.

E> These aren’t on my OF yet!

B>> I mean like take a pic where u r now.

E> I’m in my car on the side of the road!!! With other people!!

B>> Wtf are u doing?? Its fuckin 1 am! Wtf “people” are you with??

E> Me & the angels left the house tonight, Isaiah is taking a bit more convincing, motel wouldn't let us in lol.

B>> All im hearing is there are no other PEOPLE in the car.

Ezekiel looked over to see both Aethriel and Edon asleep. He knew full well neither of them slept for long, Aethriel for maybe like two hours and Edon for maybe three or four every other day, if that. He had limited time. He pulled his pants and underwear down, lifted up his legs, spread his pussy with one hand, and quickly took a dick pic before putting everything back on. Aethriel shifted; the flash probably almost woke it up. It wasn’t his finest nude, it had shitty lighting. But the pose was good enough, it wasn’t blurry, and the flash did catch how wet he was. Nervously, he sent it.

E> Here. I have other nudes this one is shit, lmk if you want to see them I have a whole folder full of actually good ones!!

The demon lord took much longer to reply than he had the first couple times, which made Ezekiel worry even more that he’d fucked up. But eventually he texted back. It was just like, seven in a row of the eyes emoji. He’d also sent a nude in return; it looked like it had been taken in the bathroom of a club or at a rave or something like that, and it featured one of the best dick pic angles Ezekiel had ever seen a cis man use without prompting. His pants were half unzipped, dick resting atop the partially opened fastener. The photo was taken from an angle at which the viewer could imagine themselves on their knees in front of this guy.
Isaiah’s description had been accurate. Big, heavy, powerlifter. He had seven or eight inches, easy. Uncut. Frenum piercing. He had some crazy tattoo written in a language Ezekiel did not recognize on his lower abdomen leading down to and onto his dick.

E> Holy fucking shit???

Was all he was able to think of to type and send.

B>> What, never played with piercings before?

E> Not a frenum!!! That is so fucking hot!!!

B>> Oh u don't know the half of it >:) when r u free & what's ur rate?

Ezekiel balked for a second at that message. Rate?? OH!!! This was a transaction! Oh, okay!

E> I can do 75/hr

B>> ha ha, funny joke. What's ur ACTUAL rate? What ru charging ppl?

E> … 50??

B>> Ur charging ppl 50 an HOUR???

E> hey I'm not going lower than that!! I didn't even think this was a paid service type thing that was YOUR idea!!

B>> Ezekiel. Please dont tell me u are accepting 50-75 American US dollars per HOUR for penetrative sex.

E> I mean I usually do 75-90 but yeah

B>> This isnt me trying to kiss ur ass or whatever but you should easily be charging three times that for an hour. Just on fucking principle. Wtf is wrong with u???

E> I'm trans. I'm ugly. This is probably the least affluent part of the entire state. Please understand that I don't even want to charge YOU at all, I just want to fuck you.

He wanted to add in “I don't want to disappoint you” but decided to leave that out.

B>> U shouldnt be saying that shit to clients!!! Jesus, ur really not THAT ugly and being trans is a niche fucking market!! Not only that but I'm a lot to handle, you should charge extra if the dude is big! Plus I've been around for thousands of fucking years I have the cash! If I were u I'd be quoting this around the 700 at MINIMUM.

Ezekiel was starting to get a little annoyed by this. He considered just not texting back but then scrolled up again to look at that fucking dick pic… shit.

E> fine. 750/hr minimum 2 hrs if there's travel, that's pussy/mouth only if you want my ass you can add another 100 on top of that. Show me a clean std screen and u don't have to use a condom. Half the cash up front.

B>> you got yourself a deal my friend.

Baraqiel sent another two pieces of media, each more mildly concerning than the last. The first one was a printout of an STD screening test that did include tests for things like gonorrhea and hpv, but also included diseases he'd never heard of before like one labeled “The Scourge.” The second thing was a short video. It was again taken in what appeared to be a club bathroom; the demon lord was positioned over the sink, dick out, touching himself. It was a really, really good angle, the camera was placed again so the viewer could see him head on. Baraqiel was tall enough that he was kind of aiming down into the sink, teasingly pulling his foreskin back over the head and showing off his piercing. At the 30 second mark in the video, he came, cum getting all over the basin of the sink, dick twitching and pulsing with each rope… Ezekiel covered his mouth with his hand. Wow. That was. A LOT…

E> Alright awesome don't bother bringing condoms.

He managed to type and send, after deleting his first draft (“holy shit, omg, paint my fucking womb please” or some atrocious shit like that.)

B>> Thats what I like to hear! When were u thinking??

Aethriel awoke before the others. It got out of the car as silently as it could and transformed, taking off into the night and searching for a place that would fit the bill for what they needed. It flew to a few different cities, tapping into local broadcasts and a few people’s thoughts to check out what kind of shit was going on, what the humans were talking about down there.
The first city it went to was just too small. It wasn't going to hide them, and there were practically no demonic strongholds. It was so weird thinking about how it considered that to be a negative thing, now… Then again, it thought, I suppose I am attempting to CREATE one of those…
The second city was definitely not too small, but mainly it was just too LOUD. Aethriel could see Edon going actually insane living there, so it continued on.
Travelling a bit further it found itself in a fairly normal major city, a little further off from what Isaiah probably wanted, but, hey, this was pretty much the best the Seraph could do. It passed over the city more closely now, examining places they could potentially stay. It looked in the windows of a few apartments, delighting in watching the oblivious little humans live their little lives. It determined, though, that Isaiah was right; they could not afford rent there. Not even CLOSE. And the angel of the Lord was pretty intimidated by how much crime it would have to commit to pay for even a decently sized apartment… okay. Maybe it would be better to look at alternative options…
It flew past a pretty old church building in a fairly quiet part of the city. It definitely wasn't city center but it was busy enough and discreet enough to intrigue the angel. It descended and looked through the windows to get a closer look.
Looked… very empty. Nobody would notice if they just took it over, right? Upon close inspection Aethriel found this place had not even been used in a while. It was definitely big enough. The area was perfect, just what Baraqiel was probably talking about. It didn't have THAT many serious structural problems. The doors were pretty big. They could always redo the shattered stained glass, Aethriel kind of felt excited at the prospect of getting to actually MAKE one of those. Isaiah for sure wasn't going to be appreciative of the angel building one of those at the old house.
Signs posted on the building showed that it would be up for purchase. From what the Seraph could glean from the local people's thoughts, it seemed like the old owners got in a decent amount of legal trouble and had to sell this place to pay legal fees. Huh. Well… that made the angel's job a lot easier at least.
Stealing some professional looking clothing from a department store was pretty easy. Putting it on in the middle of the city was less easy, but once the angel was actually WEARING clothes, things went more smoothly.
It was able to convince the owners that it represented some real estate company or another, convinced them it actually had the money and authority to pay, and changed a few memories around in their heads a little bit to make their understanding of the deal and if they'd ever really gotten paid at all a little fuzzy. It had taken around two days to do this. Keys in hand, it flew back the way it came, intending to go pick up Isaiah and see how he was.

Chapter Text

Edon was getting bored waiting for Aethriel to come back, and it could sense that Ezekiel was too. He seemed antsy and a little tense. So, when the human requested Edon go check on Isaiah real quick while he went to a truck stop to shower, the Throne jumped at the opportunity to be out of the van and took off right away.

E> I am here.

He texted, closing the door behind him in the little room. It contained a big mirror, a sink, a chair, a toilet and a shower with a bench, and not much else. Moths flew around the lights and the place felt very damp.
“Turn around.” Ezekiel jolted hearing that familiar voice, spinning around to see the demon very much already present, directly behind him. He took a good look at him, reaching out and holding Ezekiel’s chin in place with his fingers as if he was inspecting the man's face for flaw. Ezekiel felt his cheeks get hot and hoped Baraqiel wouldn't think his blushing was lame or cringe. This was not how the human had expected this to start. Ezekiel had a lot of insecurities, and the last thing he wanted right now was his high paying and very attractive client to look closely at his face. Shit, we're not even five seconds in and he’s already going to be upset about how ugly I am!“Hello, Ezekiel. You're early.” He was wearing a leather jacket studded with spikes, with decals of blue and white lightning shooting across the fabric. He had on a relatively beat up pair of black jeans that looked like the type motorcyclists wear, and scuffed up well worn docs.
“Hi.” He managed to say back. “Uh, um. I mean. Thank you for inviting me here.” Ezekiel said.
“Hey, the pleasure is mine. As you can see, I picked quite the high quality venue,” he said sarcastically, gesturing to the general vibe of the room and sitting down on the bench in the shower, feeling it would be a more appropriate size for their activities. He’d evidently already put a towel down. “I dunno, I felt like we’d both be more comfortable here than some high end hotel room.”
“Yeah, thank you for that honestly.” Ezekiel said, “I have had enough of hotels for the next few days at least. Fucking in truck stop bathrooms is much more my speed.” He pulled off his jacket and placed it on a nearby hook. Underneath was the only sexy and also clean clothing he'd had available; a plain black spaghetti strap crop top that showed off his nipple ring easily through the fabric. He hoped the demon liked black.
“Hey, don't start taking off your clothes yet!” The demon said, “C’mere.” Ezekiel obeyed the command, taking a few steps closer to the bench Baraqiel sat in. He was expecting the demon to reach out and touch him, but, instead, he pulled out $375 in cash and handed it to him. “There's your half up front, as requested.” He said. Ezekiel took the cash, counted it, and stuffed it in the back of his jeans pocket.
“I… Thank you.” Ezekiel responded, crossing his arms across his chest. “So, uh… look, you’ve been nothing but respectful so far, but, this is all coming off as a little uh. Suspicious, to me, how insistent you’ve been about payment. What kind of weird kink shit do you want me to do? There’s a few things I just won’t do no matter how much you pay me. Like… I'm sorry but I don't do scat related play, I just can't do it. There are some dudes who do, I can give you some phone numbers, but…” He said, trying to seem like he’d actually stick to that. “...Okay, I mean, I do SOME stuff like that, but you'd have to pay me a lot more than $300. Piss stuff, that’s different, just gimme a general idea of what you wanna do and we’ll talk.” The demon actually laughed at that.
“All I want you to do is sit here in my lap, take a hit from my pen,” He pulled a weed pen out of one of his many pockets, “take as much of my cock as you can, and take a few loads. That’s all. If you do well enough there might be a next time, and THEN I’ve got some ideas. But you’ll have to do pretty well, I mean… How many humans do you think I’ve fucked in the past 6000 years?”
“...Probably a lot.” He answered.
“Yeah. You have 6000 years of competition.” He pulled Ezekiel closer and started unbuttoning his jeans, pulling them down off of his slender hips. The human stepped out of the clothing and allowed Baraqiel to throw them to the side, as he stood there shivering in his tank top and matching black boyshorts. “No pressure or anything. Hey, what’d I say? C’mere. Sit in my lap.” He unzipped his pants but didn’t take them off, just waited there expectantly. Ezekiel climbed into his lap, straddling the much larger man. Ezekiel was like five foot two, and the demon lord was more than a foot taller than him. Baraqiel handed him the pen and he took a hit, as the demon’s hands trailed down to his ass, squeezing and toying with his soft flesh.
“Oh shit-” He turned his head to not cough directly in his client’s face. “That’s- that’s really strong-!”
“Haha, yeah, maybe I should have warned you.” He laughed, “Eh, well. You’re already going to be too high to drive, might as well take another hit, right?” Ezekiel gave Baraqiel an annoyed look before taking another hit, then handing the pen back.
“I don’t want to get too fucked up,” He said, resting against him, and the demon nodded, taking the pen and taking a hit before putting it back in his pocket.
“I get that,” Baraqiel shifted Ezekiel in his lap so that his pussy was resting right over the unzipped part of his pants. The human got the message, doing his best to grind over the top of them as the demon focused its attention on taking his shirt off. He raised his arms to allow him to pull the cloth from his body, revealing his chest. The little gold nipple ring he had in caught the light. “Why just the one?” Baraqiel asked, pulling on it and enjoying Ezekiel’s shocked and aroused reaction.
“I-I lost the other one.” He said. “It fell out. I couldn’t afford to replace it, so… now I just got one.”
“You think there’s still a hole?”
“Um, probably not, I’d probably have to get it re-pierced.”
“Damn.” He said, “Maybe you should get on that.”
“Does it look that bad?” He asked, hands flying up to the remaining ring, “I can take this one out, too, if you want, really, it's whatever you want, just say the word.”
“No, I mean, for later.” He said, like that made any sense at all. “I wanna see two pieces of metal on you minimum by the next time we do this. Gold is preferable.”
“Why???” Ezekiel asked, confused. The demon leaned down a bit to put his mouth around Ezekiel’s one pierced nipple, toying with the ring with his tongue (and toying with the other nipple with his fingers) before sending a mild electric shock through the ring, causing the human to jolt, leaning further into the demon. “FUCK!”
“Because that shit is conductive as hell.” He commented. “You strike me as an educated man, Ezekiel.” He said, resting his hands on the human’s hips, dipping his fingers below the line of his underwear, “What do you know about me?”
“V-very little, honestly!” Ezekiel said, shivering as the demon tore off his panties and threw them, too, somewhere near his other clothes. Now Ezekiel was naked on top of the almost completely fully clothed other man. “I mean, I know you were a Watcher. I know you had a wife and kids, I know you got beat to shit by Michael…”
“Okay, okay, first of all, Michael didn’t beat me to shit, okay,” He complained, rubbing gentle circles into the smaller man’s hipbones, “He fucking tried to. He fucking tried to, but, I mean, it would have been 199 on 1, and his success rate would have been pretty damn low. Michael had his hands full with ‘Aza. He sent his fucking goons out on us, it was several angels against me, and I’ll have you know I ripped the wings off one of them.” He said. “We broke HALOS out there.”
“So… you’re saying you know how to successfully injure and harm angels?” Ezekiel said, pulling down the demon’s boxers and taking his cock out. It definitely looked bigger in person, and fuck, the demon was IMPRESSIVE to look at... His frenum piercing had a pretty gold barbell in place. Ezekiel wanted to know what that felt like in his mouth, very badly. And it had been ages since he’d gotten a chance to play around with a foreskin, too… he wanted to put his tongue under that thing…
“Of course I do. Angels and demons hurt each other all the fuckin’ time, it’s you humans that can’t seem to get it right. Unholy weaponry is unfortunately a daily necessity in hell.” He said. “Hey, you’re getting me off topic. Keep talking about ME.” He teased.
“Um… you taught people about lightning?”
“There you go. Now you’re getting it.” He pulled Ezekiel even closer, so that his pussy was resting right up against his cock. He kept groping Ezekiel’s ass as he spoke. “As I said, you’re an educated man. Tell me, what kind of kinky shit are you into?”
“I-I, uh, I mean, um… I’m into piss?? I like being spanked?” He said, listing the first things he could think of off the top of his head.
“And did you get spanked as a kid, like, as a punishment?”
“...I did when I went to that fucking Catholic school.” He said.
“I see… so, for you, getting spanked by some fucking nun for cutting class led to you sitting right here on my lap getting wetter and wetter each time I do this-” He lifted up a hand and brought it back down, smacking the human’s ass pretty hard. Ezekiel groaned and leaned into the demon lord, resuming his grinding, this time with no clothing in the way, frotting his below average t dick against Baraqiel’s fucking massive hog. “And for me, getting thrown into hell because I showed my human wife how to count the seconds between lightning strikes led to having little capacity for restraint when I see a human with a super conductive metal ring decorating his cute little tits. That, and, I mean, I’m a demon. I have little capacity for restraint in general.”
“That… that tracks for me. I’m down to do some weird shit with electricity next time around,” Ezekiel said. “I-I’ll make sure I have my other tit pierced in some nice pretty gold for you next time… I’m sorry… Hey, can you um… can you hit me again?” He asked, more submissively than he’d hoped it would come out.
“Which one of us is paying the other, hmm?” Baraqiel teased, giving him another slap on the ass anyway. He really liked how he could feel his pussy clench around nothing as his hips moved, smearing slick all over his cock; that was going to be fun to play with when he was actually INSIDE the human. He could just imagine fucking into this human and spanking his little ass when he wanted him to tighten up…
“R-right, right, sorry!” Ezekiel said, face buried in the demon’s jacket.
“Good boy,” The demon said, moving his hands to Ezekiel’s hips and waist, “Now, sit up straight for me.” Ezekiel obeyed immediately, sitting up straight and detaching himself from the demon’s nice jacket. “There you go. Get up here, get on it.” He instructed, dick in hand. He lazily and slowly stroked himself as he gave Ezekiel a once over with his gaze. The human swallowed the drool in his mouth, lifting himself off the demon’s lap to allow him space to line up against his pussy. He sat back down when instructed to do so, taking the demon’s cock as best he could. Baraqiel dug his nails into Ezekiel’s hips as he breached him and the human sank lower. He made a soft pained sound as he took the much larger man, but he was both very good at this and very good at making it seem like it felt good for him even when it didn't, so, it was pretty easy to power through the mild pain and take Baraqiel’s cock to the base after a few self paced thrusts. He did his best to adjust as quickly as possible, not wanting to keep the demon lord waiting. “Good, good boy, fuckk… wow, I did not think you were going to be able to take all of me that easy. Usually humans tap out after the seven inch mark, and you’re pretty tight, too...”
“I pride myself in my commitment to taking it balls deep,” He said, amused and very aroused. It wasn't too bad of a stretch, really. The pain of the initial penetration was quickly fading into pleasant fullness, and he REALLY liked the way that piercing felt… it made him want to start moving his hips right away. “I have a little bit of a massive breeding kink, I REALLY like it when I can feel you pressed against my cervix like that…” He shifted his hips, making sure the demon was getting the full effect. He wanted him to feel like it was a straight shot into his womb.
“Oh, I can tell we are gonna get ALONG,” Baraqiel said, beginning to bounce the human slowly and gently in his lap, lifting him easily from the hips. Ezekiel could feel the metal of the piercing slide against his walls; It felt a little bit strange at first, and as he kept moving Ezekiel up and down his cock, it faded into a pleasant textured sensation, not dissimilar from a dildo with ridges or something. It felt nice. “First you tell me don’t even bother bringing condoms. Then you take it to the base like it’s your full time job and tell me you want me to press it up against your cervix, what, so you can FEEL me knock you up? What’s next, you’re gonna tell me you’re sterile?”
“You’re not gonna believe this,” He said, giggling.
“...No fucking way…”
“I’m sterile.” He admitted. “My tubes got absolutely FUCKED by some STDs I got a few years ago… I don’t want any fucking kids… I mean, just to be clear I don’t have chlamydia OR gonorrhea ANYMORE-”
“So you’re telling me you’re cheap, easy, consequence free pussy with a breeding kink and pierced tits?” He interrupted the human before he could make it all sound worse. He was really getting into it, allowing Ezekiel to do a bit more of the work (and damn, the human picked up on what pace and pattern Baraqiel wanted REAL quick, he really WAS a professional,) so that he could move his hands and touch his skin, feeling up his ass, chest, and thighs. Ezekiel reveled in the overt groping. As much as he tried not to, he caught himself thinking about Edon. Edon kind of touched him like that, with that air of wild desperation characteristic of either NEET virgins or hugely impatient guys whose brains fired off with a lot of “TOUCH TOUCH TOUCH NOW NOW NOW ALL OF IT ASS THIGHS TITS!!!” at the first sign of willing pussy, like they couldn't get enough fast enough. Maybe it was an Ophanim thing? Although Ezekiel wasn't sure WHAT kind of angel Baraqiel used to be, or if that even mattered anymore… Either way, he liked it. It made him feel desired.
“Basically, yeah, you summed up all my good qualities right there.” Ezekiel kept the pace, pulling up a few extra inches and then bringing his hips down hard, making sure the demon FELT that contact with his cervix. He tried to prevent himself from showing it affected him, but the demon was not lying when he'd said he had little capacity for restraint; he jolted underneath the human and pushed his hips up to chase that contact.
“A-and you’re down to get the other tit pierced?” The demon made a halfhearted attempt to restart that line of teasing as Ezekiel rode him, not wanting to give up any control. He liked the way that one ring looked, and thought it would look so much better with a few volts going through it.
“Fuck yeah, I wanted to do that anyway. Plus it would be pretty hot to like, have your marks all over me, y'know? That new piercing will basically be like you having your damn name on me forever.” He replied. Baraqiel’s eyes widened and he shifted his position on the bench at that comment, sitting up a little taller and leaning a bit more forward, to get those last few millimeters of cock into Ezekiel’s soft, warm, inviting pussy. Now that he was going unquestionably balls deep, he could feel the human’s cervix tap softly against his head with every thrust, not just every few when he got the angle right. It was like each moment of contact between cervix and cockhead pulled another coherent thought from the demon’s mind. His womb just felt so fucking inviting…
“Fuck, I want to mark you up. You're such a willing little slut for me, I LOVE it…” The demon said, wrapping his arms more fully around the human and slotting his face between Ezekiel’s neck and shoulder. He breathed over his neck and reveled in the way the human shivered with arousal. “I’m sure it t-turns you on to know how easy it would be for me to just… fuck, I could just pick you up right now and slam you into that wall, fucking,, fucking crack the tile… bite your pretty little neck, and…” He trailed off, coherent sentences devolving into half stifled moans.
“And???” Ezekiel questioned, unsure of how to respond to that half of a sentence. The demon lapped over the sensitive junction between his neck and shoulder, grazing him a few times with his teeth, wanting so badly to just bite down…
“Shut up!!! It’s been, uh… fuck… it’s been a while since I’ve…” He managed to say, shifting even more forward and holding Ezekiel to his chest more closely as he increased the pace. “Since I, fuck, since I’ve met a human that didn’t absolutely insist on using a condom…”
“Did you lose your train of thought?” Ezekiel teased, “I think you were trying to make some smart comment about what a slut I am, or how bad you wanna bite me and mark me, or something, and then you got distracted.” The demon had fully taken over for him in the movement department, no longer interested in Ezekiel’s attempts to do the work for him. It tried to change positions again, and, realizing Ezekiel’s legs were in the way, made a frustrated low growl as it had to stop momentarily to grab and reposition them; now, Ezekiel was straddling the demon’s waist with his legs instead of the bigger man’s thighs, and Baraqiel was fucking into him almost like he was a pocket pussy. Heat built in the human’s lower belly…
“I-I didn’t lose shit!” The demon replied, “Fuck, it feels so much better without a condom, you humans aren’t fucking lying about that… and, shit!!!! You don’t even have an IUD!!!”
“Nope, no IUD,” He continued, “No IUD, no implant, I’m not on the pill… what other birth control is there?” He wondered aloud. Baraqiel just fucked him all the harder. He smirked even though the demon couldn’t see it. “Diaphragms are kinda old news… oh, I’m probably gonna start ovulating in a few days, so I’m probably fertile as hell right now, I’m definitely not using the family planning method… I bet if you came in me right now you'd knock me right the fuck up, first try, it would be so easy…” Baraqiel’s eyes went from tightly shut to wide open. The human didn't smell overtly like luteinizing hormone just yet, but, Gods, the suggestion made the barest hint of the stuff much more noticeable. It definitely wasn’t helping that Ezekiel had not-so-subtly crossed his legs as best he could behind the demon’s back, sensing he was getting close and wanting to heavily encourage him to cum inside.
“You…REALLY… shouldn’t say… that kind of thing!!!! To a Watcher-!!” The demon warned, thrusting a few more times before cumming with his cock as tightly pressed to his cervix as he could get it. He held the human’s hips down as he came, fighting the urge to dig his teeth into his shoulder until he tasted blood as he shot rope after rope as directly into his womb as possible. It felt REALLY fucking good to unload like that, directly into a human with nothing in the way, it had been way too long. The last human he’d fucked hadn’t even let him do unprotected anal, even though he’d explained multiple times that the risk of pregnancy was pretty minimal…
“You still have twenty minutes.” Ezekiel said, as the demon came down from his high.
“Shut up,” He commanded, half muffled. “Fuck… ohhh… you have GOTTA be careful about the shit you TALK about if you’re gonna fuck around with demons…” He buried his face in Ezekiel’s shoulder and neck even more, holding him close as he breathed in Ezekiel’s scent. He had absolutely no intentions of pulling out, still holding him like a doll. “Your mouth is going to cash a check your pussy can't pay…”
“What? You seemed to like it, if the cum dripping down my thigh is anything to go by.” Ezekiel commented.
“Ughhh..” the demon groaned, “Don’t remind me… I wish you could handle my other body. If I were in that form I guarantee you not a DROP would be leaving your sweet little pussy until my knot went down… FUCK, now you got me thinking about knotting you…” The afterglow persisted.
“...How big are we talking?” He asked.
“...Why do you ask?”
“Um… okay…” he said, a bit worried but still resolute, “I know this is gonna sound weird but, you fuck like a Throne. Are- I mean, were you a Throne?” He asked. “I can handle a Throne, I've taken Ophanim knot, don't underestimate me!”
“...How the FUCK did you get that from us having normal truck stop sex?!” The demon asked, incredulously, too shocked at his accuracy to be horny about his willingness to take a knot, “I mean, yeah, I was, but holy shit man!!! How many angels have you fucked?!”
“Just two, another Throne and a Seraph. But you all have your little quirks, y'know? And I'm telling you now I can handle even the messiest and least experienced Thrones. I can handle you.”
“Wait wait wait. Wait. Hang on,” Baraqiel asked, “Okay, hang on. What do you think Thrones fuck like?!”
“... You're kinda like, out-of-control, very easy to tease, frantic, easily overwhelmed, wannabe doms. Like. You really want to dominate and hold down and impregnate, but you just get way too horny and start losing your mind the second you have some ass in your hands. Edon started crying and called me a stupid ugly whore, held me upside down, in its true form, and actually ended up tearing my pussy in its first rut.” He said, proudly. “It came like three times and passed out still tied. I can't imagine what it would have been like if I was actually its type, I assume I got off easy because I was just the only available pussy that day.”
“Okay, and, Seraph?”
“More analytical and sensual, more like, ‘fuck I wanna explore this, what can your body do, what can it take, what can it do to me, I'm looking at the atoms that make up your being as we fuck right now, I wanna look THROUGH you and into your very soul, I’d get the same enjoyment out of making out as I would a really good hand job’ type vibe. The type of guy you'd wanna smoke a joint with and watch a movie while you bang, type of being that would scream out arcane secrets when they cum. When Aethriel touches me, it’s like, examining my body, like it’s trying to sequence my genome or some shit. But Aethriel specifically, I don’t know why, I just think it's probably on the more ‘head empty’ side of things when it comes to Seraphim. I just. I’ve only met one, so…”
“That… that is pretty accurate, considering you've only fucked one Seraph.” He said. “Hang on. I'm gonna text the Watcher Leaders group chat real quick. They're gonna love this.” Baraqiel pulled out his phone and started texting.
“This?? This is also high-key Throne behavior,” Ezekiel commented, feeling another rivulet of cum drip down his thigh as the demon sent a few text messages.
“Can I take a picture of this? I won't get your face in it, don't worry.” He reassured the human. “And it's just going to a group chat of like 26 or so ultra powerful big dog demons that fell from heaven because we were all so down for human pussy, it's no big deal or anything, I can't anticipate this causing a problem in the future.”
“...fuck it, why the hell not?” Ezekiel said. Baraqiel took a picture from below him; getting a good view of him sitting on the demon's cock, full ass in frame, Baraqiel’s hand firmly placed on his hip possessively. “Do you want to go another round, or??”
“Did you cum?” He asked, still looking at his phone.
“Do you actually care, or are you trying to disprove my stereotype?” Ezekiel asked. “Either way the answer is no. I got close though.”
“Y'know what? I was gonna actually try, okay?” He said, putting his phone away. “I was gonna sit your tiny little flat ass on my face and let you ride it, and now I'm fuckin’ not. Now you fucking did it,” The demon picked him up as it stood up, “You wanna sit there all high and mighty and say I fuck like a Throne like that's a BAD thing? You’re gonna reap what you sow.”
“I never said it was a bad thing!” Ezekiel said, hissing at the feeling of cold tile against his back.
“You implied it!”
“I didn't imply shit!” Ezekiel said, wrapping his legs around the larger man. “Hey, careful! You don't want it to slip out!”
“You’re really gonna try and pull that shit on me right now?! I'm not falling for your tricks!” He said, knowing full well what Ezekiel did last round, with his whole locking his legs behind him thing. He shifted so that he was holding Ezekiel’s thighs, spreading his legs apart and not allowing him an inch of movement as he restarted his thrusting. “You’re not getting another load in your pussy like you want, you little slut, this time I’m gonna paint your tits with it.”
“Go right ahead,” Ezekiel said, reaching up and clasping his hands behind the demon's neck, “I don’t think you’re gonna be able to resist.” The demon looked both incredibly pissed off and turned on, somewhere between ‘fuck this guy, amirite’ and ‘FUCK this guy, am I RIGHT?!’ The look of being horny and pent up and pissed off turned to a look of pure shock and horror in an instant, and Ezekiel heard a high pitched ringing sound permeate the air, almost like an alarm was going off. “...Uh… hey, what's that weird sound? What's going on?”
“Fuck, SHIT, GODDAMN IT!!” The demon said, pulling out and trying to wipe off his dick at least a little before shoving it back in his pants, “Your shitass roommate just opened the fucking amulet, he's about to die, I only have like ten seconds before -” There was a flash of white lightning, and the demon was completely gone. Ezekiel just stood there, naked, stoned, cum dripping from his pussy, worried and confused…
...At least I asked for half up front…

+++

Edon took a few little detours on its trip to Isaiah's house. Namely, it stopped by a liquor store to steal some wine, anticipating a need to bribe Isaiah to let it in. It arrived at the house to see the place in flames. Fire investigator trucks parked outside, as were an ambulance, two cop cars, and a firetruck. Two paramedics were loading a human body onto a stretcher, and the cops were talking to a guy that looked suspiciously like Isaiah’s description of that demon he’d met at work the other day, as well as Aethriel, who was wrapped in a reflective shock blanket in its human form, in tears, screaming and being unsuccessfully dragged away from Isaiah by a cop. No. NO! This cannot be happening!!! Edon thought, staying hidden and hovering over the scene.
Isaiah looked like he had some significant burn wounds. He definitely wasn’t moving. The paramedics had cut his clothes from his body and were talking amongst themselves about when the helicopter was going to arrive. They worked together to put a tube down his throat, which seemed to especially devastate Aethriel, who stopped fighting, just falling to its knees on the ground sobbing.
A helicopter did show up. It almost hit Edon directly, actually, and the angel had to drop vertically to avoid it, allowing it to land and the humans on board to take Isaiah with them.
“Please! Take me with you! I do not want to leave my- my husband, let me fly with you!” Aethriel begged, trying to tie the shock blanket into some kind of covering so it wasn’t entirely naked. One of the flight paramedics elbowed the other one and they motioned to pull the Seraph onto the helicopter with them. They took off into the night as the firefighters continued to put out the blaze. The cops were still talking to Baraqiel to try and figure out what happened, and he looked VERY uncomfortable.
“No, I don’t need medical attention! Yes! I just came here to chill! I have no idea how the fire started! No, I didn't know the guy was MARRIED! NO! I am not high right now!” He was saying, and this was not going over well with the cops. “Why am I under arrest??? What the fuck!!!!” Baraqiel was taken in handcuffs in the back of a cop car, the paramedics left, and eventually, so did the fire department. Edon hovered there a long time, watching the fire investigators come in and do their little thing, before putting yellow tape everywhere and fucking off because it was “too late for this shit, the FBI is gonna handle it anyway,” to quote the chief investigator.
Edon searched through the ruins of the house, still not totally grasping what just happened. Ashes fell through its fingers as it touched objects that it had come to see as familiar, if only briefly. The garage was unrecognizable, the ceiling entirely caved in and Isaiah's truck completely destroyed. The couch was completely reduced to ash, as was everything on Isaiah’s altar including the bong, which was shattered and melted into pieces. The bookshelf had no usable books, except for his Bible which looked almost untouched. His TV and VCR were completely destroyed. His kitchen was completely destroyed as well, all the appliances burnt and melted and broken. Edon picked up a ceramic plate that was still in the cabinet and looked at it closely. Aethriel had made food for it and served it on this plate just a few days ago. It put the plate down and left the ruined kitchen.
Isaiah’s room was a mess. Almost nothing here was salvageable; Aethriel’s paintings were completely destroyed, his dresser was a pile of ashes, clothes and shoes and bedsheets were reduced to nothing but fragments. The big half of the Target ball that was in here no longer had paint. It smelled absolutely terrible here, like chemicals.
Suddenly, it picked up on the sound it had been hearing: the shower was on.
It went over to the bathroom.
The bathroom was pretty much the only place that looked fairly untouched by the fire, although marks from the flames marred the walls. The door was smashed in and burnt, and it looked like Isaiah had shoved towels underneath it to block out smoke. The shower was on full blast at the coldest temperature, as was the sink, which was pouring water onto the floor. The ceiling in the bathroom had caved in and there was blood tinting the water on the floor pink... Shit from the bathroom counter was smashed and on the floor, but it didn’t look like it was from the fire, it looked like it was from someone knocking it over in a panic. The amulet Baraqiel had given Isaiah was open on the floor. Edon picked it up and closed it, fastening it around its inner wheel for safekeeping.
Edon noticed that there was stuff piled in the shower.
The angel’s backpacks were in there, along with Isaiah’s backpack, and a hard plastic presumably watertight container wrapped in a garbage bag. Edon turned off the shower and looked through the bags. The hard plastic container contained a handgun, cash, and some documents; Isaiah’s social security card and birth certificate, the title for his car, the deed for his property. Edon closed that back up and decided not to go through Isaiah’s bag, assuming that it probably had more of the same inside it. Edon’s backpack had what it had left in there: the few clothing items it owned, the learn to read materials Ezekiel had found for it at the grocery store the other day (which were now soaking wet and unreadable,) the bottle of lotion that had been on Isaiah’s coffee table until recently.
Aethriel’s bag contained the small amount of clothing it owned, rocks and sticks and pinecones, its painting supplies, and a few of the smaller art pieces it had done. Edon removed one of them, a tiny canvas containing an oil painting of the house as viewed from the driveway. The door was open and a figure that kind of looked like Isaiah stood in the doorway. If Edon could read English at all, it would see that on the back, on the frame of the canvas, Aethriel had written the title of this painting, “Isaiah’s home.”
It put the wet painting back in the bag and zipped it up, looking no further. It turned off the sink because the noise was annoying it. It grabbed the stuff that was in the shower, and turned to leave. Before it did, though, it went back over to the altar and the melted and shattered remains of the bong on the floor. It picked up the pieces, threw them in its backpack, and took off in the direction it had last left Ezekiel.

In the helicopter, Aethriel watched as the flight paramedics worked on Isaiah. It recognized a decent amount of what they were doing from watching Isaiah work, but it was DIFFERENT seeing them do it to him. As they worked, they tried to give Aethriel some idea of what was going on: his burns were not TOO terrible all things considered, with the exception of his lower right leg which had caught the worst of it, but he’d been crushed under pieces of the house when the ceiling collapsed. He had blood in his lungs, and they were preparing to drain it. THAT was something Aethriel hadn’t seen Isaiah do in his ambulance. Watching the chest tube insertion, and worse, watching the blood and fluids pour out of it into the container once they did, almost caused the angel to throw up.
“Is he going to die?!” Aethriel asked.
“Not if we can help it,” One of the paramedics said, and the other one looked at the first one with a look that said ‘don’t fucking say that to the wife’.
They arrived at a big city hospital quite quickly, and Aethriel and Isaiah were immediately separated. The trauma intensive care team met the helicopter on the roof, taking the stretcher Isaiah was on and whisking him away for some sort of emergency surgery or another. They looked like they knew what they were doing; from a cursory peek into one of the doctor’s thoughts, Aethriel could glean that Isaiah was very much in a state between life and death; this could go either way. Someone grabbed the angel’s shoulder as it sobbed and it didn’t even bother to look up.
“You are his wife, correct?” The person said, holding out a knit blanket and throwing it around the angel’s shoulders.
“Y-yes!!” Aethriel lied, hoping this person was able to give it more information.
“How long have you been married?” She asked.
“Only a few months…”
“Come on, follow me. I’m going to take you to the waiting room, okay, and I’m going to get you some clothes.” The angel followed her into the hospital from the roof, and was lead through the sterile white hallways until they reached a sitting area labeled “TRAUMA O.R. WAITING ROOM.” “What’s your name, ma’am?”
“...Alexa.” Aethriel said, “Alexa Garcia, we just got married, everything was going FINE! I told him to leave that place, I TOLD him! He kicked me out and what did that do for him?! Now he is DYING! He should have listened to me!!” Aethriel cried, sobbing into its hands as this random hospital worker rubbed its shoulder.
“Why did you tell him to leave?”
“Other people’s homes were catching on fire… I thought… I thought it may happen to us too. I said I would go and find us another place to live, and he said I was crazy! He said he would not go, he said they could pry that house from his cold dead hands and now they HAVE!” It tried hard to come up with believable lies. “I came back, to check on him, and by the time I was there he was being pulled from the burning embers of… of… of our, of our home!!!”
“Did you have reason to believe someone was targeting you or people in your area? I’m sorry, I’m quite confused, ma’am.” Aethriel drew a breath in, unable to resist the ingrained part of itself that whispered prayers for Isaiah on the long exhale, prayers to a few Seraphim it knew and hoped were still in heaven, hoped were still listening, hoped could even hear it or would even care. The woman with it nodded and repeated a few of the fragments she could pick up from Aethriel’s half-whispered pleading.
“...There have been a lot of house fires…” It said again when it came to its senses just a bit more. “I believe the… government… is involved…”
“You must be feeling absolutely devastated and confused.” The woman said, cutting Aethriel off. “I don’t think the government would do this. I think that these tragedies can be really difficult to conceptualize and cope with. I don’t want such a devoted Christian woman like yourself to fall down into those conspiracies and delusions. These things happen, God is always watching out for us.”
“...What?”
“Take my hands.” The woman said, and took the angel’s hands. Aethriel saw her badge now. It said “CHAPLAIN.” “Let’s say a prayer for your husband. It must be difficult that you can’t be down there with him in the operating room, but I want you to find comfort in the fact that the angels of God are with him always, and always with you. I heard you pray to the angels just now, how about we pray for intercession from Raphael? Many of our Catholic families find comfort in a prayer like that, for God guide the surgeon’s hands, you know?”
“I…” Aethriel was at a loss for words, not even a little bit sure how to explain how unhelpful that was going to be. It settled on “I am not Catholic,” which was the least incorrect thing this woman believed about it, but the only one it could think of words to voice.
“That’s alright, these prayers aren’t just for Catholics.” She said, interpreting the silence that followed as consent. “Glorious Archangel Raphael, prince of the Heavenly Court, you are the healer of the afflicted, and the refuge of sinners. I beg you, assist our surgeons and guide their hands as you once helped Tobias on his travels. You are the Physician of God, I humbly pray for you to heal the many injuries of this young woman’s husband,” Aethriel began to cry again, wanting to tell the Chaplain to just shut up but unable to say anything through the tears and the effort of keeping its form human, “the LORD has filled your hands with balm from heaven to cure our injuries. Amen.” The angel continued to sob.
“Just tell me i-if he is alive!!” It managed to say, “Please, you can do at least that, right?”
“God can do anything,” The Chaplain responded.
“NO! I mean YOU, I am not talking to God!” It said, “Tell me if he is ALIVE! Go and see him!”
“Oh! Sorry. Yes, I’ll go now. I’ll bring you some clothing, too.” She said, getting up and walking away embarrassed.
She did not return for 45 minutes, but when she did, she came in with a doctor, and a small pile of clothing including a t- shirt with the name of the hospital on it and a blue skirt.
“Mrs. Garcia? This is Dr. Green, she’s from the ICU. She’s here to tell you about-”
“She can tell me her damn self!” Aethriel responded, taking the clothing. “Please do NOT talk to me! I do not want to speak with a Chaplain!” It put the clothing on as best it could as the Chaplain stepped back, making some comment about it being ungrateful or something before leaving the waiting room. Dr. Green untied her surgical mask and sat down with Aethriel.
“Your husband is currently alive.” She started. “He’s in critical condition, but he is alive. He’ll be going to the trauma intensive care unit once the surgery is done, that is where I work, I’m the ICU doctor for tonight.”
“What surgery are they doing?!” Aethriel asked, relieved to hear he was alive. “What happened, is he okay?”
“Well, he has a lot of broken ribs and has some lung damage from being crushed, so we are repairing his chest wall and his fractures. He also has burn injuries, but those are not nearly as bad as the crush injuries, most of the burns are on his leg and torso, he’s also got some on his face, but they aren’t critical like those on his legs. He’s in shock, so we’re giving him medicine to keep his blood pressure high enough along with fluids, and he is on the ventilator right now which is a machine that is breathing for him. The good news is that his head is okay; no head injuries, which is a really good thing, really lucky!” Aethriel stared at her. “So the bad news is, we’re going to have to amputate his leg.”
“WHAT!”
“He was badly burned and crushed and it is not something that can be fixed meaningfully. If we were to try and save the leg, there would be a very high likelihood he’d never walk again. He lost most of the tissue below the knee, it was almost skeletonized… We would be amputating above the knee on the right. And we need you to sign these consent forms for blood administration. If you believe he would be very against amputation, please tell me. Otherwise, I would appreciate you signing consent for those as well.” She handed it the forms.
“...Um… consent forms??”
“Yeah, so, because you are his wife, and he is unable to consent to what we’re doing, you can consent for him.” The lights flickered.
“I… yes… I will sign.” It said, taking the pen with shaky hands.
It was another several hours before Dr. Green came back to get Aethriel, who had spent that time staring out the hospital window at the city below. It watched all the people walk around, the cars drive, the planes and helicopters fly in. It felt numb.
“Mrs. Garcia? We’re here to take you to see your husband.” The doctor said, and Aethriel stood up, wrapping the shock blanket around its shoulders and following them, barefoot and silent, through the halls.
The hospital room was cold and dimly lit. Isaiah looked like a wreck. His eyes were closed, and he had burns on his face like the doctor had said; not a large amount of burn, but, a significant portion of the right half of his lips had clear burn injuries that connected with burns down his neck and chest. He was naked except for bandages, which mostly covered burns on the right half of his body, the side that was the most affected. He had tubes coming out of his chest on both sides. There was a tube down his throat. Drugs ran through tubes into IVs mostly on his left side. It looked like his right arm was broken; it was definitely in a cast and there were stitched up incisions along his shoulder where it seemed the doctors had operated. His right leg was missing just above the knee, and the remainder was wrapped tightly in some specialized bandage.
“Isaiah?” The angel called out in a small voice. It couldn’t pick up anything from his thoughts at all. “Is… is he alive?”
“Yes, he’s alive.” The doctor said, “He is just sedated. We’re giving him a lot of medication right now.”
“When will he wake up?”
“We’re going to try and wean him off the sedatives as soon as possible. But you can still talk to him, he may be able to hear you.” Dr. Green said. “Please, take all the time you need. Do you need to call anyone?” She offered. Aethriel turned towards her.
“YES! I have to call his brother!” The angel lied, “My phone was destroyed in the fire, can I borrow one???”
“Sure, you can make a call from the hospital phone here.” She picked up a landline looking thing and showed the angel how to turn it on. Aethriel grabbed it and dialed Ezekiel’s number. The doctor left the room for Aethriel to be alone with Isaiah and its phone call.
“EZEKIEL!!!” Aethriel shouted into the phone the second he picked up. “YOU NEED TO COME HERE NOW!!!”
“What the fuck is going on?” Ezekiel asked, “Where is ‘here’? What happened??? Edon told me Isaiah fucking died!”
“He is not dead!” Aethriel said, anger rising at Edon’s stupid bullshit. “He is very injured but he is not dead! He is badly burned and, and he is not breathing on his own, and he has broken bones, and he is missing a leg, he is NOT dead!”
“Not breathing means not alive!” The Seraph could hear Edon say in the background.
“HE'S ALIVE! Just come to…” Aethriel told Ezekiel the address. It cried into the phone. “Please, please come here…”
“I fucking TOLD him to leave!” Aethriel heard someone say in the background.
“Who is with you?!”
“It's me, Edon, and Baraqiel, we just broke him out of jail, he got arrested.” Ezekiel explained. “But that's not important right now. We're all coming, we'll be there in like… five hours. Actually, Edon, can you just fly ahead of us???”
“No! Not fucking Edon! It needs a damn chaperone!!” Aethriel said.
“Fine, um, okay, the only other option is gonna be Baraqiel dropping me off and Edon driving my car.” He said. “That-”
“That is fine!” Aethriel said. “Just come here now Tell the desk you are his brother!!” It hung up on them.
Aethriel held Isaiah's hand and spoke to him in his mind, trying very hard to break through the haze of sedation to get through to him that it was there and that it wasn't leaving.
“I am here, Isaiah, I am with you… I am going to keep you safe, I love you, I am so, so, sorry… I found a new place, a new home for us, it is just like I said it would be, it is big and affordable and it is so nice… when you get out of here I will bring you there… I will paint the ceiling with you, we will make it look like the stars!!!” Isaiah was silent and motionless except the mechanical up and down of his chest powered by the ventilator.
Eventually it was able to pick up something he was trying to say back to it.
Medicines… sedatives… turn it off…
“Isaiah???” Aethriel said out loud this time.
Sedative!!! OFF!!!
It looked at the IV pump and saw that the scrolling marquee along one of the pump channels said “Dexmedetomidine- Precedex.” It remembered hearing a nurse talking about that stuff being a sedative… Turn it off! Aethriel pressed buttons on the pump until that channel turned off. It took a good twenty minutes before he was able to think anything else clearly. Thank you… fuck… everything hurts… what the fuck is going on???
“You were in a fire!!! You lost your leg Isaiah!! You have tubes in your lungs!!! Your chest was crushed!!!” It cried, squeezing his hand.
I lost my LEG??? Isaiah asked, brows furrowing, Which one?!?!
“Your right! You have burns all along the right side, I think the ceiling fell on you and crushed you on that side.” It explained.
Baraqiel must have pulled me out… I opened the amulet once I saw the flames start to come through the door and the ceiling started to crack. I don’t remember anything after that. FUCK!!! My leg is actually gone??? Like how much of it?!?!
“Um… you still have part of your thigh…”
IT’S CUT OFF ABOVE THE KNEE???
“Yes…”
MOTHERFUCKER!!! He screamed in his head. His heart rate ticked up from the 70s to the 120s. I am going to KILL God, I don’t give a fuck, this is fucking stupid!!!! Get me out of this fucking bed! He started to sit up, and was very quickly thwarted by how bad it hurt to move. ...Can you tell the nurses I need more pain meds??
“Yes!!! Of course!!!” Aethriel started to stand up, but Isaiah squeezed its hand.
Wait wait wait!!! Not yet!!! I still want to talk to you and you’ll have to turn the sedative back on before the nurse comes back in!!
“Oh, right, yes!!!” The Seraph said, tears in its eyes. “Isaiah, Isaiah I was so worried!!! I rode in the helicopter with you!!! One of the guys in that helicopter definitely thought you would die!!!”
How’d you convince them to let you in the helicopter??
“I told them I was your wife. I also signed the consent forms for the blood they gave you and the… amputation.”
Fuck… thank you for being here. They squeezed each other's hands.
“Ezekiel is on the way, so is Edon. We will all be with you. Isaiah… I really thought you were going to die!!” It cried. “Never do that again!!!”
I’m sorry. I… I should have listened to you. I love you. He thought.
“I love you.”
You do know, um, I AM going to die someday, right? Isaiah thought, looking at Aethriel again. Like… this accident probably took a good… 10-15 years or so off my life expectancy. I am not gonna make it to 75.
“Do not say that!!!” Aethriel said, gently slapping his hand, “You are going to live 120 years if I have to drag you kicking and screaming out of hell myself!!!”
“Aethriel!! Isaiah!!” Ezekiel stood in the doorway with his little visitor badge pinned to the front of his shirt. Baraqiel followed close behind him, not intending to stay long, but interested in viewing the damage.
“Shh!!” Aethriel said, “I told them my name was Alexa!”
“Got it,” Ezekiel said, coming in and looking over Isaiah’s mostly motionless body. “Holy fucking shit!!”
Tell him I can hear him! Isaiah thought.
“He can hear you. I am tapped into his thoughts, I will let you know what he is saying.”
“Isaiah, you stupid bitch,” Baraqiel said, leaning over the side rail, “I done fucking TOLD you you didn’t have time to sell the house. And you didn’t fucking listen, and now look at you, you’re missing a leg, and you interrupted a DAMN good hookup with your whole ‘ohh save me, save me I’m DYING’ bullshit, and then made me look incompetent, and then I got ARRESTED!” He complained.
Go fuck yourself Baraqiel! “He says go fuck yourself.” Aethriel said.
“Yeah well, next time, give me like, a few minutes to respond!! Don’t open the damn amulet IMMEDIATELY before dying, give me like thirty seconds to put some goddamn pants on!”
I didn’t KNOW the ceiling was gonna cave in that fast!! “He says he did not know the ceiling was going to cave in so quickly.”
“Yeah, well, you sure did pile a bunch of bullshit in the shower. Why didn’t you just LEAVE the house???”
And make myself an even more obvious target?? Besides, I put that stuff in there the SECOND you guys left! “He says that would have made him a more obvious target, and that he put that stuff in the shower before the fire started.”
“...Okay, you got me there.” The demon said. “Look… Isaiah, you’re a cool prophet, but, you HAVE to be more fucking careful! You’re lucky your wife’s a literal angel, otherwise this would take months to heal.”
We aren’t actually married, Aethriel just said that to get on the helicopter. “I am not actually his wife.”
“Whatever. Just… I’m sure you guys know what to do from here, right? You don’t need me anymore?? I can go jerk off in peace now?”
“No, I actually do not know how to heal humans.” The Seraph admitted. “I mean, not past basic application of saliva, or the old fish gall trick…”
“You can use your blood, too, not just the saliva.” He explained, “Fish scales work well on burns, just douse them in the blood/water mix to sterilize… fuck, you guys gotta ask Samyaza or Hermani, they’d know way better than me. All I know is you don’t shock asystole.”
If you so much as TOUCH me with any part of a fish, you will not be getting head for at least an extra month after this bullshit heals. “He said he does not want to be touched by fish.”
“Fine, then he can let the humans try. I heard they’re actually using fish scales too, now, actually...”
Aren’t you late for jerking off alone, or whatever it was you said you were going to do?? “He is asking you if you are late for your solo jerk off session.”
“Oh shut the fuck up, man, I saved your life. You technically owe me.”
Ezekiel bailed you out of jail, that’s enough of a payment! How the fuck did you get arrested at the scene of a house fire anyway?? “He says Ezekiel and Edon bailing you out should be enough payment, and is asking how you got arrested.”
“Sorry, I can’t hear you.” The demon said, turning around. “Hey, no hard feelings though, we’re chill. I’ll come to your housewarming party when you guys finally find a new place, I just… it really pisses me off when people fuck around and find out and then I'm the one responsible for fixing it. I don't usually say I get what it's like to be a God, but… I get what it's like to be a God.” He leaned down to give Ezekiel a hug on the way out, whispering something Aethriel couldn't hear in his ear before walking out of the hospital room and disappearing around the corner.
“Hey Isaiah, I'm here too!” Ezekiel said. “Uh, I'm sorry for what I said earlier. It was pretty fucked up for me to brush off you losing your home like that.”
Is the house okay??? “He wants to know if the house is still there.”
“Um… no. It's… Edon was there, it told me everything was pretty much ruined. I'm sorry.”
The entire thing??? What about my room? “He wants to know about his room.”
“Especially your room. Edon was unable to stay in there because of how much it smelled like chemicals, it was burning its eyes. But!!! Edon got the backpacks, they're in my van and it's bringing them right now, if you have stuff in there!!” He said.
...I had herbs that my Mom sent me from her garden before she died in a package in there… “His mother sent him herbs from her garden before she died, they were in his room.”
“... I'm so sorry. Do you know which ones they are? Maybe we can grow some when we find a new place…”
Catnip, mint… rosemary… lavender… there were others too… “He listed a few herbs but does not remember all of them. Catnip, lavender, rosemary..”
“Yeah, we can grow some of those!!! We just have to find a new place to live.”
“Actually, I already found one.” Aethriel said. “It is in this city.” It held up the key ring it was holding. “I can give you the keys and you can go and look at it more closely with Edon later.”
“Oh!!! Is it an apartment? How many bedrooms?”
“No, it is, um. It is an old church. The previous owners were selling it to pay legal fees, I just… suggested that I was a real estate agent for a firm, and promised to pay twice what they were asking if they could process the transaction immediately. They agreed, and I used, um… well… a bit of an illusion… but, they think I paid them and they cannot remember my face or name. So. Free property.”
Damn!! That is cold!!! Good job dude! Isaiah thought. “He is telling me I did a good job. I am inclined to disagree; I did what I had to. I should not be stealing. It is just a necessity. And… and it is really fun.” It admitted. “I kind of enjoy scamming people.”
“Oh, that's sick!! Okay, uh, I can go there when Edon gets here, I'll need a ride. I'll start trying to make the place workable for the night, I'll see what's going on in there. Do you have a preference for where you want me to put your stuff, Aethriel?”
“It does not matter to me, I will not be there for a long time.” It explained.
“...Why not?”
“I am not going to leave him here!!!” It insisted. “I will not leave until he leaves!”
“But you have to sleep!” Ezekiel argued.
“I assure you, I do not.” It argued back.
“What about your human form? You can't keep that up forever.”
“I can do two days at a time and then, and then…” it looked around, “I can go in there,” It pointed to the bathroom, “...and change back for a few minutes and then go back to this.”
“I don't know if that's how it works.” Ezekiel said, “but Edon would probably know and it's gonna be here in uh… um…”

“So, to go forward, you press this pedal.” Ezekiel pointed, and the Throne floored it. “STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!!”
“How do I stop!??!?”
“The OTHER PEDAL!!” it slammed on the brake, almost flipping the car over. “Jesus fucking Christ!!! Press the pedal GENTLY!!!”
“How am I supposed to know???” Edon said angrily, “You didn't specify!!”
“Have you EVER seen me do that shit when I drive??” He asked. Edon shook its head no. “Exactly!!!” They practiced going forward a few more times until Edon got it. They then advanced to basic road signs, turn signals, speed limits, what all the lights on the dashboard meant, and other basic things that the angel was going to need to memorize to drive this fucking thing.
“Are you SURE this is less dangerous than you driving while stoned?” Baraqiel asked, watching as Edon struggled to move the gear shift and coordinate that with the clutch.
“I'm sure. I'm not even supposed to be driving at all, I have epilepsy and it is NOT managed well.” Edon hit the curb and Ezekiel had to grab the steering wheel and yank it back to prevent them from crashing. Baraqiel sighed.
“I gotta hand it to you, Edon, you’re gonna make one hell of a demon..”

+++

Arseni peered outside its office door to see a very guilty looking Throne hovering outside near the waiting area.
“Come in.” It said. This time it was five minutes early instead of thirty minutes late. The Throne knew Arseni well enough to know that was not a good sign. The Throne nervously came in and hovered across the desk from the Cherub. “How did it go? Did you find the human?”
“Find??? Um… no. I did not find him.” She explained. “Um… but… I would say there is a 30-50% chance he is dead!”
“Please, do explain yourself further.” Arseni said, folding its hands on the desk and leaning forwards. It had read the preliminary report the Throne had given it, and it was not happy.
“Well… you were right, Your Grace. There are definitely some kind of demonic forces involved in this, and I detected that it was likely some type of cloaking spell… so… I uh… I tried my best to take some readings, came up with a lot of nothing, and I figured, well, a few of these places have some demonic forces present. I might as well just torch all five locations.”
“What are the estimated casualties?” Arseni asked, revealing nothing in its voice emotionally just yet. The Throne did not like the sound of it either way.
“...Um… well… I know that one human who definitely was not the intended target definitely died.” She said. “But… other than her? I have no idea. Your guess is as good as mine, it is between zero and, um. Twelve.”
“So you're telling me right now that 13 humans could potentially be dead, and you don't know if ANY of them are the intended target?” Asked Arseni, dangerously neutral.
“Um… yes. Yes, that is correct.”
“What weaponry did I specifically entrust you with, Sebl?”
“Um… the Smite 3 consecrated flamethrower… with settings high enough to harm a minor demon…”
“What are you NEVER supposed to do with that thing?”
“...Shoot it at unidentified potentially innocent human targets…”
“And what did you do with it?”
“I just used it to start a few house fires!!!”
“A FEW?!?! SEBL!!! YOU BURNED FIVE HOUSES DOWN!!!
“I WAS RUNNING OUT OF TIME!!!!” The Throne shouted back, “You told me I only had a week!!”
“I didn't fucking say that! I said I'd sign your fucking- SEBL!!! DID YOU DO THIS SO YOU COULD MAKE THAT FUCKING DATE?”
“...Maybe?”
“Well now I am NOT going to sign SHIT for you!! I hope you're happy! Which fucking houses did you burn down, I have to do RESEARCH now!!” It started rifling through papers. “I am a direct report to Raphael, how the fuck do you think I am going to explain this to him?? You weren't even on the original assignment, I TRUSTED you with this and you went and fucked it all up for some Principality pussy!!!”
“She's the goddamn motherfucking Principality of France!!!” Sebl complained, “You can't do this to me!!! I talked big game, I told her I had a PLACE!!!”
“Yeah, well, now at least four but potentially up to THIRTEEN innocent humans HAVE no fucking PLACE anymore, Sebl, and more probably have serious fucking burn injuries, and now you can kiss your fuckin’ get out of meeting free card- OH NO!!!” It dropped a scroll.
“What?”
“THE ALL OPHANIM COUNCIL MEETING!!!” It reached across the desk and shook the Throne back and forth. “MY THRONE STILL ISN’T BACK!!! I DIDN’T REPORT IT MISSING!!!”
“What?!!? Why not??”
“I- LOOK!!! I got busy!!!” It said, “FUCK!!! Okay, shit… Okay…” It held its human head in its hands, “Okay, fuck, okay, it’s okay!!! I still have…” It looked at the calendar. “A DAY?! SHIT!!!” It stood up, crossing the room and opening up a cabinet, typing in a very complicated combination, and pulling out a weapon that was not unlike a very fancy looking glock. It turned to Sebl. “This is NOT over. I’ll see your sorry ass at the All Ophanim Council Meeting. Tell the Principality of France she can suck my FAT FUCKING COCK!” It walked out of the office, slamming the door behind it. Sebl took a breath out.
Okay, it’s fine, She thought, I can just go and slide into Metabelle’s office and hope she’ll accept my human form as a good enough Virtue substitute!!! I can still swing this, I can still- The door swung open again. Arseni stepped back inside and glared at the Throne.
“I BETTER see you there. And I need your full fucking report, RIGHT now, including the addresses of all those fucking houses you burned down, and at least some idea of what hospitals are in the area. I cannot BELIEVE that you’ve done this and I am EXTREMELY upset.” It held out its hand. Sebl nervously handed it the scroll she’d been carrying, and it opened it, briefly skimming the text, before rolling it back up and shoving it under its arm. It rifled through another cabinet and grabbed a strikingly ordinary looking but still bright pink backpack, unzipped it, checked the contents, Scrubs, makeup, stethoscope, fish organs, pen, vials of angel blood, tears, and combined blood and tears, condoms, vial of saliva, shoes I can wear in a disgusting human hospital, holy water, extra clothes, fake IDs, fake medical license, chest mounted gun holster, vibrator, bible tracts, $6000 in non sequential unmarked bills, spray bottle attachment… okay, it’s all here! and put it on like a purse. “Well?! Get the FUCK out of my office!!!”
“Does this mean-”
“YES it means you are UNINVITED from the fucking Christmas party!”
“Oh, COME ON!!!” The Throne complained, “It was just some humans!!! Since when do you give a fuck about human lives?!”
“I DON’T!” It shot back, “I GIVE a fuck about NOT HAVING TO GO PLAY GOD’S SHITTIEST PHYSICIAN at SIX AM on a SUNDAY, SO AS TO AVOID THE WRATH OF AN ARCHANGEL, FOR SOMETHING YOUDID!!!!!”
“Is Raphael really going to care either?”
“YES!!!!!!!” It shouted, slamming the door behind it again, trying desperately to cool itself off before it started a fire the second it landed on Earth, which is exactly where it was headed…

Chapter Text

# General Discussion

Baraqiel>> *Image, depicting Ezekiel and Baraqiel post-coitus, very much still inserted, cum dripping down the humans thigh, ass fully in view.* Took one of the new prophets for a test ride lol, 6/10-7/10 could be less talkative, needs another piercing (in progress, he said he’s gonna get another for me.) Takes it SO well though, and he tightens up so fucking beautifully when you spank him… not that it wasn’t a tight fit lol

Kasdeya>> I am not doing another free abortion for you, better pray his bc doesnt fail.

Baraqiel>> Aww, cute, I can tell all you asshats are jealous.

Samyaza (‘AZA)>> Dude we talked about this.

Baraqiel>> Dont tell me YOU’RE mad bc I fucked a human.

Samyaza (‘AZA)>> Talking to Kasdeya, we cannot have another Nephilim situation right now. If he gets pregnant, he’s your responsibility. No fucking kids right now. Prophets are always TERRIBLE parents and a Nephilim kid needs structure…

Arteqoph>> Got any other angles?

Kasdeya>> You guys always fucking do this!!!

Baraqiel>> *Image, depicting a slightly different angle than the one in the first picture, this one with the demon’s legs spread a little more so that the human’s pussy is more visible. The connection between cock and pussy can be very easily seen, it is evident he couldn’t be more balls deep in Ezekiel.*

Arteqoph>> Alright, ur right. I'm jealous. Gimme his #.

Baraqiel>> HELL no, not until I've had my fun. You guys can wait your damn turn.

Kokabel>> Idk man, all I’m hearing is Watchers Gone Wild Gangbang Orgy Episode 12…

Baraqiel>> You and Ziq almost killed each other last time, we are not doing that again.

Sahriel>> yeah we should probably either get another human in there or limit the amount of us that attend, last time was kind of a mess…

Kasdeya>> IS ANYONE LISTENING TO ME?!?!

Kokabel>> Ok fine, don't invite him then

Ziqel>> HEY

Kasdeya>> IF HE GETS PREGNANT, YOU OWE ME MONEY. YOU HEAR ME!?!? MONEY!!! ACTUAL USABLE CURRENCY!!!! I DO NOT CARE WHAT ‘AZA SAYS, MY SERVICES ARE NOT FREE!!!

Baraqiel>> Okay, okay!!! COOL it with the Levitical shit!!

Azazel>> You guys need to STOP getting involved with these fucking dumbass wannabe hero humans! They’re going to fail, and when they do, it’s just gonna start a shitstorm that falls down on Hell HARD. I absolutely refuse to be involved with any of this bullshit, and WHEN, not if but WHEN Raphael gets involved I am OUT, I will be SITTING THERE at the BOTTOM of the OCEAN until this BLOWS OVER. NONE of u assholes understand, you think this is a fucking game, and its NOT a fucking game! You have no idea what you’re messing with!

Sahriel>> ok cool I call dibs on your spot in the gangbang Azazel, have fun looking at weird fish in the dark, i'm about to get it

Kokabel>> I call dibs on- FUCK

Ziqel>> Is it really gonna be him OR me?!?

Baraqiel>> Hang on, hang on, everyone calm down!! I’m making a separate channel for orgy planning purposes, NOT that this is a guaranteed thing, Ezekiel has literally no idea and tbh I agree with Sahriel we need at least two humans if we’re gonna do this again with any more than 5 of us.

Daniel>> Im straight and strictly demon 4 human, count me out

Penemue>> Can I videotape it

Baraqiel>> USE THE FUCKING ORGY CHANNEL FOR PLANNING PURPOSES!!! PLEASE!!!

# Watchers Gone Wild Gangbang Orgy Planning: Prophet Edition

Baraqiel>> list is as follows: Me, Sahriel, Arteqoph, Kokabel, Ziqel, Penemue but I think he just wants to film. Anyone else?

Kasdeya>> If I’m going to be doing the cleanup I might as well get to be part of the problem…
Baraqiel>> That’s what I like to hear!!!

Kasdeya>> Show me his tits.

Baraqiel>> Working on it

Hermani>> You assholes, I was asleep for two hours and I wake up to this?!?! Yeah I want in!!!

Baraqiel>> Okay awesome, so, that makes 8 of us. Penemue do you want to actually participate?

Penemue>> Idk

Baraqiel>> ‘Aza, you want in on this?

Samyaza (‘AZA)>> Depends on where and when, also I agree with Kasdeya. I want to see his tits.

Ezekiel (prophet, not the angel)

B>> Hey man can i get some more nudes pls. The fuckin peanut gallery wants to see ur tits

E> I’m at the hospital right now. What peanut gallery?? *Image: clearly taken in a hospital bathroom, he’s holding the hem of his t-shirt in his mouth and showing off his tits, doing a little peace sign with his free hand. He still only has the one piercing.*

B>> Remember when I said I didn’t anticipate it causing a problem when I sent those pics of me cumming in u to my really cool discord server full of horny demons?

E> Yeah

B>> They got jelly :(

E> How concerned should I be?

B>> That depends on how you feel about orgies.

E> I’d say I’m pretty pro-orgy.

B>> I told them u said that and they’re sending me dick pics to send to u. Wanna see em’?

E> I’m still at the hospital!!!

B>> What, why can’t you look at nine demon dicks in the hospital?

E> NINE!?

B>> Well, that’s including Penemue and ‘Aza, idk if they’re actually gonna participate…

E> I can’t even take nine HUMAN dicks at once!! *Image: a screenshot of an email showing that he made an appointment with a piercer.* Plus my other tit isn’t gonna be pierced until next week! I thought you wanted to play with me by yourself once that was done.

B>> Fuck. You drive a hard bargain. Let me see what I can do… keep sending nudes tho, more titty pics please… *Image: Eight screenshots and one picture. All dick pics. Some of them could pass as human, but there were some in there that were definitely of true forms. Ezekiel could see that at least two of them had spikes surrounding the bases of their dicks, spines that curved backwards and looked like they would REALLY hurt and tear at flesh if they got into pretty much any part of his body. One of them was a very pretty looking tentacle dick, not the ridged, rigid type a Throne had but softer and slimier looking. He thought that maybe that could be a male Seraph??? It looked like it had a Prince Albert piercing. None of them were circumcised. Ezekiel wondered, at what point did God start circumcising His angels???*

Azazel (Bossman 2)

B>> Heyyyy

A>> I am not in the mood for this today.

B>> I just need a quick favor. It’s like, your favorite thing to do. I promise. I need you to do a piercing. Just one!!! I will pay you.

A>> Pay me with what?!

B>> Whatever you want, idc!!!!

A>> … What body part.

B>> It’s not FOR me. Well. I mean. It’s KINDA for me. But it's not ON me. Can you give Ezekiel another nipple ring? Gold?

A>> You shouldn’t fucking pierce with a ring. Nipples heal way better with a barbell. *Image: a selection of gold jewelry.* Show me his tits.

B>> *Image, depicting Ezekiel’s tits, this one a higher quality image than the hospital bathroom one. He had cum all over them, like, a LOT of cum. At least four loads.*

A>> Ok…. that is pretty hot but I mean like, a picture that i can actually see his anatomy in, without the cum…

B>> Fine… *Image depicting Ezekiel laying on his back, legs up, naked, spreading his pussy.*

A>> I can’t believe I’m doing this. Fuck. His anatomy is perfect for a triangle… fuck it, I’m gonna do both.

B>> FUCK yeah, knew I could count on u, bud! What do I owe u?

A>> Oh, you’ll find out. Take him down to Hell yourself, you gotta stay for the ENTIRE appointment, you have to agree to follow my rules to the letter or I won’t use my good jewelry that heals the piercing right away.

B>> Oh come ON! You’re really gonna make us all wait MONTHS for him to heal?

A>> you better follow my fucking instructions to the letter.

Chapter Text

Azazel knew it was a bad idea. He KNEW it was a bad idea, and yet… He looked at that fucking picture of the human with cum all over his tits for probably the thirtieth time that night, as he sat in his studio, and he… he just couldn’t pass that up. Come on. He swiped over to the other picture, and zoomed in on his cunt. Fuck…
This was a BAD idea!! He was a nobody, some random fuckass human, Azazel could pick up another, hotter, sluttier trans man at any fucking queer bar he wanted to just by leaning up against the bar, having a combat knife in his belt, and flashing the industrial when he flicked his hair.
But… he couldn’t exactly take him to HELL, now, could he??? He couldn’t exactly expect a rando to not freak the fuck out or tell everyone he knew about the experience if Azazel were to use his true form, now, could he?? It isn’t like they didn’t fuck humans, but, keeping a low profile was kind of important, and true forms really only came out when they KNEW a human was chill, and that took a while… they didn’t want this shit all over the news.
Besides… It seemed like the others were all on board with this “new prophet” bullshit… he wasn’t gonna be able to convince them out of it anyway… He looked at the picture one more time. Fuck it.

Ezekiel (client, not the dead guy)

A>> heard you’re coming to me for piercings. I need pics.

E> Oh shittt!!! Yeah of course!! For the consultation? *Image: A very well lit shot of his tits, very medical in nature, as if he was having a friend hold a light so that the best possible anatomy image could be taken.*

A>> I need a pussy one too.

E> Why? *Image: A very well lit pussy pic, not showing off the anatomy Azazel needed to see, but, still pretty well lit, similar to the other one.*

A>> Damn you just sent it anyway??? I need it bc Im giving u a triangle too.

E> FUCK YEAH!!! I’ve always wanted one of those!!! Here’s a better pic, I’m sure my dick is big enough. *Image: Pussy pic, lips spread apart so it was easier to see his t dick. He was soft in the picture.*

A>> nice. Baraqiel will take you down to me tomorrow, wear something loose, show up clean.

Because I’m going to enjoy defiling you…

Azazel’s piercing studio in Hell was truly a thing of beauty. Ezekiel couldn't contain his excitement as he entered through the huge iron door, to see the absolute majesty that was the place. Art of many kinds plastered the stone walls, from oil paintings to graffiti to chiseled reliefs. Most of them were depictions of tattoo art, piercings, scarification, naked bodies, and weird kinky sex. The walls were completely covered with art and blood red paint. There were knives and needles and whips and broken pieces of armour, guns from across the ages, mirrors, jewelry of every possible type, and statues of beasts and humans strewn about artfully, nailed or hung on the walls, or in the case of statues, stood up in strategic places on the floor. There was a large chandelier type object hanging by chains from the ceiling, a stone mannequin of a Cherub hung by its necks, with one of those “my name is” name tags stuck to its back: “RAPHAEL.”
There were black and red exam tables in a few different cutout areas of the wall so as to provide an area to actually perform piercings and tattoos and art. There were also sinks (presumably for things like hair dye,) and jewelry making equipment, and mirrors and vanity sets for makeup… It was a very busy space, but it was something out of Ezekiel’s daydreams.
Various demons worked at the stations, performing various types of body modification. Ezekiel and Baraqiel made their way to the back of the studio, to the only actual private room, Azazel’s personal studio. Heads definitely turned. It wasn't often that living humans went to hell.
“I wanna go on record and say this is a HUGE step up from that truck stop bathroom,” Ezekiel said, clinging to Baraqiel’s arm. “Not that I didn't enjoy that, but, this is fucking incredible.”
“Yeah, well, don't speak too soon.” The demon said, sounding a little annoyed. “Azazel made it pretty clear to me this isn't going to be a fun visit…”
“What do you mean?!? He's giving me a free fucking nipple piercing, and I don't know if he told you, but he told ME that he's ALSO doing a triangle. Do you know how fucking bad I’ve wanted a triangle?! It's fucking impossible to find piercers who do that on Earth, at least, piercers who know their shit…”
“Yeah, no… I heard. I'm aware.” He said. “It’s uh… ugh. You’ll see. NOTHING with Azazel is ever free, just, believe me...”
They entered the private studio.
Azazel sat cross-legged on one of those chairs tattoo artists and doctors sit on, the round backless ones with the wheels. It was black and made from what appeared to be very high quality leather and some dark metal that gleamed in the light, which emanated from several oddly shaped lamps that seemed to float in the air, getting out of the way of the beings that walked within the room. He spun around, putting down the necklace he’d been working on when the two other men walked in.
“You’re late, asshole.” He said. Ezekiel swallowed. Holy shit. Holy shit…! He thought in his head, doing his best not to OBVIOUSLY leer at the guy who was about to pierce his tits. He could feel his fucking boxers getting wet, and wanted to hit himself for wearing fucking BOXERS to this appointment instead of something sexier. The goat-headed demon had fur down the backs of his arms and trailing down his back and chest, as well as goatlike legs and hooved feet. He had some of the sexiest horns the human had ever seen, they were ridged and sharp and fairly straight, just bent a little bit backwards, and sported beautiful gold cuff jewelry encrusted with gemstones. He had a decent number of currently visible piercings; several ear piercings including but not limited to some small gauges in both ears and an industrial on the left (how the fuck he’d managed that with goat ears, Ezekiel had no idea,) and a septum ring. He wore several pieces of other jewelry as well; bracelets adorned each wrist, and he wore a sort of short skirt/loincloth looking garment dyed a beautiful, deep red which also featured metal decorations.
“I’m so sorry,” Ezekiel apologized, wanting to tell Azazel that he had no idea when the appointment was even supposed to be nor could he get into hell by himself, but he stopped himself out of fear that it would sound too much like a lame ass excuse. “We should have come much earlier, I don’t wanna waste your time.” Azazel laughed,
“C’mere, sweetheart…” He said, beckoning Ezekiel over with a finger. He obeyed, much to the dismay of Baraqiel, who was still in his human form and looked annoyed and too hot in his clothes. The human stopped about a foot or two away from the demon, unsure of what ‘c’mere’ meant in this context. “I ain’t blaming YOU. You’re the goods, he’s the delivery boy.” Azazel gestured with his head to Baraqiel, who crossed his arms.
“Can I get out of my human form now???” He asked, very embarrassed about having to ask permission for anything, much less something like that. But he’d agreed to follow the instructions Azazel gave him to the letter, and that was in there. So. Here he was. Fully clothed, human form, in hell.
“Hell no, I told you already. You’re LATE. Sit the fuck down in my cuck chair.” He pointed to a chair in the corner. It was a short chair upholstered with hair-on leather in a black and white pattern. It had arms, and it was just a LITTLE too small for Baraqiel to sit comfortably.
“Okay, Azazel, bud, I love ya, but I have to draw the line somewhere.” He said. “I am not sitting in that fucking chair, especially not after you called it that.”
“Then the deal is off.” He said. They stared each other down.
“What deal?” Ezekiel asked, feeling like he was missing something here.
“I don’t work for free, sweetheart,” The demon explained, “and your- I mean OUR- client agreed to some choice terms and conditions to pay for your pretty little tits. Those terms being, bring him in for a session, but you do as I fucking say, to the letter. And, fuck it, I don’t know, a half talent of silver.”
“A HALF- are you fucking insane? You’re talking Babylonian talents here? It’s two fucking piercings!”
“Is… is that a lot?? A little?? Help me out here, I’m here for this drama.” Ezekiel requested.
“It’s like 15 grand!” Baraqiel exclaimed.
“For two complicated instantly healing piercings, on a tiny little human? A human you’re FUCKING?? From one of if not THE best piercer in creation? If anything I’m giving you a fucking discount.” Azazel countered. “The jewelry alone is worth more than that.”
“Okay, okay… I’ll sit in the cuck chair, but I’m not paying you half a fucking talent of silver.” Baraqiel offered. “When we made the deal, all you said was that I had to follow your instructions. You never said shit about any silver.” Azazel said nothing, narrowing his eyes and watching closely as Baraqiel awkwardly sat down in the chair. He seemed to revel in Baraqiel’s obvious discomfort.
“You know what? Fine.” Azazel replied, “But if you so much as step out of line even slightly, I’m making it a full talent.”
“Fine. If all I gotta do is sit in a chair, I think I can handle that.” He said, frustrated and half joking. At this point, Baraqiel assumed that this was all some stupid joke. Azazel owed him for those new cordless tattoo guns, and he assumed that these piercings were gonna make up that debt. Baraqiel had not in fact remembered that those had already been paid for in full.
Azazel swiveled back around in his chair and bent over to get closer to eye level with Ezekiel, facing in such a manner that Baraqiel could get a good look at the side profile of the two while he did his consultation.
“So, sweetheart, let’s get that shirt off, yeah? Let’s see what we’re working with.”
“Oh, yeah, of course!” Ezekiel said, far too quickly. He was really, really confused right now, and VERY turned on. He was detecting some serious sexual tension here, but this was his first time in Hell. Maybe this is just how it was??? He didn’t want to make it weird! He pulled off his too-big T shirt as normally as he could, folding it up. “Where should I…”
“The shirt? Oh, just throw it over there on the chair.” Azazel said casually, nodding towards the chair Baraqiel sat in. Ezekiel hesitated, but, God, those fucking EYES stared directly into his soul with some type of fire, and he couldn’t NOT obey. He threw the shirt without even looking over at Baraqiel. It landed on the other demon’s thigh, and he made a move to pick it up. “HEY!” Azazel said, whipping around to stare Baraqiel in the eyes, “DO NOT touch that fucking shirt. Hands on the sides of the chair!”
“Hey, fuck you dude! I’m just trying to-”
“Two talents if your hands move off the arms of that fucking chair.” He said. “Do not expect another warning.” Baraqiel narrowed his eyes and breathed in really upset-sounding, but he obeyed. Azazel turned his head back to face Ezekiel. “You can just ignore him, really, sorry about that.”
“Y-yeah, okay.” Ezekiel said. “Don’t even worry about it, I am the furthest thing from upset.”
“Good, good. Alright, I’m gonna touch you now.” He informed Ezekiel, before reaching out and messing with his current jewelry. “Get a little closer, sweetheart. How long have you had this?” Ezekiel blushed and stepped closer, until he was practically standing between the demon’s thighs.
“Few years,” He said as the demon tugged on it, fucking with it in such a way that it COULD be interpreted as erotic, or purely professional. Ezekiel definitely couldn’t tell.
“Seems like it healed pretty well. You’ve got great anatomy for it, looks good on you. Real slutty.”
“That was the goal,” Ezekiel said, hoping it wasn’t too obvious how much this was turning him on. Azazel switched to the other side, pinching the nipple between finger and thumb, maneuvering the flesh in an analytical way that still somehow felt PURPOSEFUL, like he knew what he was doing, in more ways than one.
“Yeah, that’s totally healed through. You aren’t gonna be able to get jewelry through that, it’ll have to be re-pierced.” He cupped the human’s tits and messed with them, pressing them together and squeezing gently, meeting Ezekiel’s wide eyes and smirking before letting go and spinning around in his chair to open up a drawer in one of the several vanities / workbenches lining the walls. Baraqiel was starting to understand how this was going to be… Azazel turned around again after pulling out the entire drawer from the vanity, showing off the contents to Ezekiel.
“Here’s some of the options for piercing jewelry. Top three rows are gold, bottom three are titanium.”
“WOW.” Ezekiel breathed, “These… these are fucking gorgeous… You made these???” There were a few pieces that looked relatively plain, but most of them had some kind of tiny, intricate detail. A pair of gold barbells with Azazel’s sigil artfully incorporated into the ball closures caught his eye, but he quickly decided against those, thinking that might be a little too forward of him to suggest.
“DON’T fucking choose titanium!” Baraqiel commented, gripping the arms of the chair.
“Yes, I did. All of these are handmade by yours truly, and they’re top quality. I don’t know of another being who does it better than me.” He bragged, ignoring Baraqiel entirely.
“Titanium doesn’t conduct for shit!!!”
“They’re… wow. I… I’m sorry, this might take me a minute.” Ezekiel said. He stole a glance over at Baraqiel, enjoying how pissed off he looked having to sit there. “Do you, uh, have a specific recommendation?”
“You askin’ me what I think would look best on your tits?” Azazel teased. “I’m partial to these,” He pointed to a pair of titanium barbells that were made to look like little guns, with the barrel on one side and the handle on the other. “But they’re a little… much. On you? Hmm… lemme see. Put your hands behind your back for me, yeah?” He put the drawer down on the exam table and rolled back up to Ezekiel (who had obeyed the demon’s command, grasping his forearms with his hands,) cupping his tits in his much bigger palms, toying with them for a good fifteen seconds, pulling a few little horny noises from the human. It was pretty obviously just groping, even Ezekiel could tell that he wasn’t gaining any additional diagnostic information from this. When he pulled away, Ezekiel was a blushing mess. He kept his hands behind his back and kinda looked off to the side, still presenting his chest. “I mean, I hate to pierce with a ring, but… you really are tempting me. I’d LOVE to see you in some pretty nipple shields, too, honestly, but… no. I gotta stick to my principles and recommend these.” The demon picked up the drawer again and pointed to a pair of titanium barbells with little demon wings at each end instead of a ball. They gleamed with tiny, extremely fine rubies that must have been hell to set in the tiny piece.
“NO fucking titanium!!!” Baraqiel continued to complain, seeing that Azazel was definitely pointing to the bottom row.
“Oh, I really like those!” Ezekiel said, “But, um. Do you have anything similar in gold?”
“...I have these.” He pointed to the barbells with his sigil on them that Ezekiel was looking at before. They were solid gold, with some kind of little black glass or crystal window in the balls at the end which revealed the sigils in a strikingly readable white / chrome. It was almost like they were tiny little emblems made from silver, somehow suspended within the glass.
“Those are perfect.” He said.
“You haven’t even seen the other side,” He said, opening the glass cover of the drawer and taking out the little barbells from their spot in the velour. He flipped one of them around. The other side had text on each ball closure: ‘FUCK’ on one side, ‘ME!’ on the other.
“Even better!” Ezekiel said, inspecting them closer.
“What the fuck do they say?!” Baraqiel asked. Both other men ignored him entirely. “HEY!!!”
“I got other ones too, hang on…” He turned around again and pulled out another set, same sigil on the front, but the back said ‘CUM’ and ‘HERE’.
“Oh, shit, now I can’t choose!” Ezekiel said, comparing the two.
“I mean, if you want MY advice,” Azazel said, “I’m partial to the idea of a nice pearl necklace. I love to see a human decorated; go with the second ones.”
“Sounds good to me, those are perfect.” Ezekiel said. “Wow. Those are fucking incredible… I know I keep saying that but like, how the fuck do you even make something like this?”
“Trade secret, sweetheart. If you wanna know, it’s gonna cost you.” He said, putting away the barbells that said ‘FUCK ME’ and putting the ones he’d chosen in a small glass dish on the vanity. He opened another drawer and started prepping supplies. “Get up on the table for me, yeah?”
“Cost me what?” Ezekiel said, hopping up on the table.
“More than you can handle, believe me.” He didn’t even look over at the human as he poured some substance into the dish, presumably some kind of disinfectant.
“I can handle more than you think.” Ezekiel said.
Azazel took out a needle in a package, too. He turned around with a quill pen dipped in ink in hand. “Alright, sit up straight for me, I’m gonna mark you up.” He said. He got closer to the table, bending down to eye level with his tits, and carefully placed two dots on either side of the nipple that wasn’t yet pierced through. “Ugh, this angle is terrible. You’re too short, boything.” He chided. “I gotta redo it. It’s all off center. Fuck, if only you could be like… sitting up on top of something, like, I dunno, my lap.”
“Oh, shut the fuck up!” Baraqiel commented, “That table goes up and you know it!”
“I like that idea.” Ezekiel said. “How do you want me?” The demon set down the pen and stood up, towering over Ezekiel and easily lifting him up, turning him towards one of the many mirrors in the room so that all Baraqiel could see was a sliver of the reflection. He sat himself down on the table with Ezekiel in his lap, facing the mirror. He picked up his pen again. “I, um, I hate to say this but, um, isn’t this a MUCH worse angle for you to work from??” The human said, softly.
“Shhh… shutthefuckup.” Azazel said, placing the dots easily in like two seconds. It was now obvious to Ezekiel that there was no problem with the angle in the first place, he was REALLY experienced and could probably do this with his eyes closed. “Look at your pretty little tits in the mirror, how’s that look? Look even to you?” They were perfectly on center dots, placed evenly. No notes.
“T-they’re perfect.” Ezekiel said. Azazel put down the pen again and began playing with his tits once more, leaning down to whisper in Ezekiel’s ear.
“You like em’?”
“Y-yeah!!” He rolled his unpierced nipple between his practiced fingers and tugged on the ring on the other side, before reaching down again to squeeze and press his tits together as much as he could, considering their small size. He undid the captive ball in the ring on his nipple and removed it, leaning over to grab one of the new ones. He put down the old one, and leaned back over to a more neutral position, undoing the ball closure and putting the new jewelry into the existing piercing.
“Good, good… fuck, you’ve got a cute little chest, my sigil looks fucking delectable on you. I’m REALLY gonna enjoy this… Y’know, with small tits, it’s so much easier to pierce if I get a good head on angle…” He explained in a low voice. Ezekiel was pretty sure that was a lie, but he wasn’t complaining.
“You mean like not sitting on the side?” He asked.
“Shh, keep your voice down, don’t give the cuck chair guy a preview! Yeah, I’m gonna lay you back on the table, I’m gonna get between your legs…” He trailed a hand down between Ezekiel’s thighs, touching too-softly over the crotch of his jeans. “I’m gonna lean over you, inches from your face, and push that needle through, oh, I hope you fucking scream…”
“Hate to disappoint but, my pain tolerance is pretty fucking high.” He said, “I probably won’t even flinch.”
“I like a challenge.” Azazel replied. “I’ll do it slow.”
“Hey!”
“What are you two assholes whispering about?!!” Baraqiel said, noting that yeah, he’d been right. This was some weird sex thing designed to humiliate him.
“I mean, my other idea was to lay you back on that table and make you cockwarm me while I take my sweet fucking time lining up that needle.” He whispered, unbuttoning the front of Ezekiel’s jeans.
“I really like that idea, but… What about the triangle…?” Ezekiel reminded him, pressing back against the much larger being. He could feel the demon was hard, gently throbbing underneath the layers of clothing in the way.
“You know he has spikes on his dick, right?” Baraqiel yelled. “You don’t wanna deal with that!”
“We haven’t even done the consultation for that one yet, human, I can’t even guarantee you’ve got the right anatomy!” He chided, bringing a hand up under Ezekiel’s chin and tilting his head up, so that they were face to face. “Your dick might not be big enough.”
“My dick is definitely big enough.” Ezekiel said. “I’m not like, hung, but it’s big enough.”
“I dunno. I think I’ll have to do a taste test.”
“Fuck,” Ezekiel said, mostly out of reflex, “I mean, by all means… far be it from me to question your methods.”
“I like a boything that doesn’t question my very standard, totally normal, non-horny methods,” the demon said, at a normal volume this time, “Let’s get those pants off, yeah, and then I’ll take a good look down there for you.”
He laid Ezekiel back on the table and pulled his jeans off, throwing them absentmindedly at the chair Baraqiel was sitting on. They again landed on his lap. Ezekiel was wearing light gray boxer briefs underneath them, which the demon immediately noticed had a little wet spot where his pussy was. He got closer to Ezekiel, pulling aside his loincloth to show off the goods for a moment.
“Holy fuck.” Ezekiel said, propping himself up on his elbows. Baraqiel hadn’t been lying: he did have spikes on his dick. Like some of the pictures of the orgy attendees he’d seen, they were relatively small but wickedly sharp spines that curved backwards. They encircled the last few inches of the demon’s dick, which was otherwise honestly a lot thinner and much straighter than Ezekiel had expected. That wasn’t a BAD thing, in fact, Ezekiel was relieved. He wasn’t really a size queen, and the amount of too thick, borderline uncomfortable dick he’d been taking was a little much recently. The entire thing was still almost the length of his forearm, though, and very much hard, flipping up as soon as the heavy cloth was removed from over the top of it. He also had a pretty large gauge Prince Albert, which was partially covered by his foreskin. The demon gave him a few seconds to take the sight in before laughing and covering himself back up, pressing his hips into the human’s and grinding against him through a few layers. Ezekiel desperately wished he’d just put it in already, that brief glimpse was NOT enough.
“Gotta get you hard somehow,” Azazel responded, amused as he dry humped the much smaller being playfully. Ezekiel was pretty sure this wasn’t at all how his last piercing appointment had gone, but he wasn’t complaining.
“Okay, ALRIGHT, this is a little MUCH, don’t you think?!” Baraqiel said, still not releasing the arms of the chair, not willing to drop 60 grand today. At that, Azazel actually looked over at him, looking him dead in the eyes as he stepped back, pulled off Ezekiel’s boxers, and threw them so they hit Baraqiel in the face.
“Let’s see what we have here…” He sat back down in his swivel chain and held Ezekiel’s thighs apart. Baraqiel dug his nails into the arms of the chair. He was wet. Very wet, “I’m ovulating” wet. His dick was completely hard, twitching in the cool air. Azazel had been careful to avoid his dick when they were dry humping, really wanting to just fuck with him and get him as wet as possible without giving any relief, but, it seemed that it didn’t matter. He was hard anyway. “Hmm.. I dunno…” He reached out and pinched the tissue underneath Ezekiel’s t-dick, messing with it in that same ambiguous analytical/horny way. He slid his thumb over the head, and Ezekiel leaned back further, trying to spread his legs wider as his pussy twitched. “Is that as hard as it gets?”
“Um-! I mean! Kinda!!!” He said, “I’m pretty fucking turned on, I mean, it guess it would get a little harder if there was suction applied…? He suggested. Azazel sighed in a very fake way.
“Guess I’ll have to do even MORE work… Baraqiel, you move those hands an inch and it’s THREE talents.”
“What- FUCK YOU!!” He shouted, but Azazel wasn’t listening, because his head was between Ezekiel’s thighs. He gripped the human’s legs and lapped hungrily at his sex with his tongue, focusing a good deal of attention on his t-dick and ignoring his pussy. Ezekiel didn’t even try to be quiet, moaning and pleading and eventually holding onto the demon lord’s horns as an anchor point. The demon not-so-subtly palmed himself over his clothing, not wanting to take his dick out again just yet.
“Fuck, FUCK, Azazel…! I’m, fuck, I’m gonna-” The demon stopped right there, pulling his head up from between the human’s thighs and breaking the soft suction surrounding his t dick. Ezekiel made a cute little whimpering sound as his chance at cumming slipped away. “I… I was so close…”
“That’s weird. I can’t imagine why, this is just a normal piercing consultation.” The demon said, spreading his pussy apart with his thumbs and taking a good look at what he was working with now. Ezekiel’s t dick was fully hard, swollen and pink and wet with saliva, and he twitched and flexed every couple seconds. The demon lord pinched the tissue underneath the organ once again, confirming that yeah, this piercing was going to be totally fine on his anatomy. Not that he’d needed to suck him off to figure that out, but…
“Is it fucking, big enough, or whatever??” Ezekiel asked, a little frustrated.
“Oh yeah. I could tell before, you’re a perfectly fine candidate.” He said, going back to the vanity and pulling out yet another drawer of jewelry. “Alright, for this one I’m only piercing in gold, and you don’t get a choice, I’m only giving you a basic one.” He pulled out a plain yet solid gold horseshoe barbell. “I think I’m gonna start down here and THEN do your other tit. Hold fuckin’ still.” He wiped off Ezekiel’s pussy with a cloth of some kind soaked in some type of liquid that kind of burned a little. The demon placed its marks, a little slower this time, and took a good look at the placement himself before handing Ezekiel a mirror. “Sit up, yeah? Take a look for me.”
“Oh yeah.” Ezekiel said, sitting up and looking at himself. He was still hard, and the dots looked like they were exactly where they should be. “Perfection.” Azazel swiveled around again in the chair and rifled through some drawers until he procured the needle and catch device he wanted to use.
“This is gonna really hurt,” The demon warned, preparing its supplies yet again. It turned back around, holding them. “Lay down. I’m not fucking around this time, DO NOT move.” Ezekiel obeyed, spreading his legs and laying down. The demon lined up the needle and the catch, and shoved the needle through.
“Ow.” Ezekiel said, closing his eyes a little tighter, but not moving at all and staying very quiet.
“Damn. Okay, maybe you weren’t lying! You took that pretty fuckin’ well.” Azazel praised, grabbing the jewelry and threading it on the needle, pushing it through. He twisted on the other ball, and the metal got HOT, REALLY hot.
“Fuck! Ow! What is that?!?!” Ezekiel asked, sitting up.
“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. Lay back down for me, yeah?” Azazel said, standing up and pushing Ezekiel down onto the bench. “I got tits to pierce and I intend to do it fully inserted.”
“But, wait a second! You literally just gave me a dick piercing!!” He said, the burning beginning to subside. “Is that not a huge risk of infection???”
“Not if it’s from me.” Azazel commented, undoing his loincloth this time and letting it fall to the floor. Ezekiel propped himself back up on his elbows to get a good look again. “There’s a reason I’m asking for a talent for these babies. They burn like hell, but sweetheart, that pretty thing just saved you six months of heal time.” He explained. “You can get head, like, later today if you really wanted to. I wouldn’t, but, you could.”
“Are you gonna give me aftercare instructions??” Ezekiel asked, legitimately concerned.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever, I’ll text 'em to you. Just trust me, sweetheart, I wouldn’t fuck up my own handiwork just for some pussy.” He reassured him. He lined himself up with Ezekiel’s very wet cunt. “Relax for me, yeah?” Ezekiel did not have to be told twice. He spread his legs wider and spread his pussy with two fingers.
“I call dibs on round two…?” Baraqiel said, hopefully. He really didn’t care anymore, having very little shame to speak of baseline, and really just wanted to at least be able to get off to this. He was pretty obviously hard under his jeans.
“Four talents if you move a fucking FINGER,” Azazel said, not even looking at the other demon as he slid into Ezekiel. The human laid back down on the table, thoroughly enjoying the feeling of being full again. “Fuck, you’re WET… so fucking warm, too…”
“Y-you’re telling me…!” Ezekiel countered, expecting the demon to start thrusting once he got down to the spikes. The very top row of spikes were more like sandpaper than hooks like the other ones, and it didn’t feel too terrible when they rubbed up against his flesh. He lie there thinking, It probably isn’t often he gets to have that part of his dick stimulated. I wonder if those spines are sensitive. Fuck… I mean, I couldn’t take the big ones, but… Hey, wait, maybe I can! If it’s just cockwarming… “Can uh, can you go a little deeper?” He asked, shifting his hips.
“You don’t really want that.” Azazel informed him, bending over to grab the piercing supplies for his other nipple. He set them down precariously on Ezekiel’s stomach, evidently pretty serious about the whole cockwarming thing.
“Why not?” He asked, gently squeezing around the demon’s cock, trying to make it hard to resist. He was doing a pretty good job of that.
“Because it’s going to fucking HURT you,” He said, like the human was stupid, “Those spines don’t come out easy. I’d know.”
“How about just the top row?” He pulled the demon in a bit closer with his legs, touching the first row to the outside of his pussy once again.
“You’re… you’re REALLY playing with fire here…” The demon stated, “Those things are fucking sensitive, and I don’t know if you know this, but, demons aren’t exactly known for their RESTRAINT, yeah? I’m being nice right now. This is me being nice. Take it while you still can.” He lined up the needle and the catch over Ezekiel’s nipple, and then realized that while this was pretty hot… it was actually a really shitty position to pierce in. He felt really off balance like this. It would be so much easier if I was literally just like. Two inches closer. He had to stand back up and readjust, trying hard not to graze him any more than he already had.
“I mean, yeah, I wouldn’t want you to fuck me like that, but, for some cockwarming? I’m sure you’ll be careful. Come on, when’s the last time a human let you do THAT?”
“...You… I… It doesn’t…” He sighed. This could be a ten minute argument, or a one minute bad decision. He chose the one minute bad decision. “You know what? You asked for it. Don’t start fucking crying, okay, because once they’re in, they’re IN. I am NOT taking them out until the piercing is done, it’ll contaminate the entire setup.” He placed down the supplies, held Ezekiel’s hips, and pushed in very slowly, just a centimeter more at first. Ezekiel gasped, but he didn’t seem to be in pain. Huh. He’d expected this to end right here; with Ezekiel screaming and being like, ‘fuck, I fucked up, your dick feels like fucking sandpaper, I’m OUT, take it out!!!’ Instead, he just looked at him like, ‘aren’t you gonna put it in??’ The demon pushed in a little more, past the first row of true spines, and… oh. OH. That… that was…
He had one of the strongest urges to push in further that he’d ever experienced, maybe matched by like, the first or second time he’d ever fucked a human. Sure, he’d put the spikes in other ex-cherubs, even a few current cherubs. But they could TAKE it, that was DIFFERENT, the first like, fifth or so of a Cherubim cloaca was practically armoured. The spines were necessary because they stimulated ovulation, why waste an egg when there’s nothing there to fertilize it, right? The spikes hardly even sunk into the tissues, they rarely even caused much bleeding unless it was some crazy rough sex…
Feeling the spikes graze against flesh that would REND?
“You uh… you okay?” Ezekiel asked, as Azazel gripped his thighs with little idea of what the fuck to do now.
“Y-yeah… I’m… I’m… fine…” He said, unable to stop himself from pushing it in a little bit further. “Fuuuuck…. you, uh, you mind if I bottom out? It ain’t all gonna fit, I promise…” He wagered to guess the answer would be something along the lines of ‘fuck no, are you crazy,’ but figured he might ASK…
“Yeah, go ahead!!” Ezekiel responded. It didn’t even hurt that bad. It definitely wasn’t comfortable, but, it wasn’t tearing his flesh. It kind of felt like someone fingering him with jagged, untrimmed nails.
“Fuck, THANK you-” He almost forgot what he was even doing here in the first place as he slid the rest of the way in. He’d been right, it didn’t all fit. He bottomed out against the human’s posterior fornix with half the spikes in, half the spikes out, and he definitely TRIED to get those other spikes in there too. No dice.
“Are you FUCKING SERIOUS?!??!” Baraqiel said, squirming in his chair, “You can’t fucking do this to me!!!!! What the FUCK Ezekiel, how are you even DOING that???”
“No comments from the peanut gallery!” Ezekiel said, addressing Baraqiel for the first time since the beginning of this whole thing. He again intentionally tightened up around the demon’s cock, drawing a sound from deep in his throat.
“Fuck. Okay, alright, l-let me get this fucking piercing done, and then, then it’s coming out, I can’t fucking…” He leaned forward (at a much easier angle, now, he admitted to himself,) and pushed the needle through the markings like he’d done thousands and thousands of times, and, just like Ezekiel said, he didn’t make a fucking sound. He just laid there with that smug ass grin on his face, barely even saying “ow” even at the worst part of it. The jewelry went in, Azazel got rid of the needle, and then he dragged the human forward on the table, desperately trying to figure out a solution to this. If he didn’t pull out, like, NOW, he felt like he was going to lose all ability to control what happens next.
“So how do you get it out?” Ezekiel asked.
“I-I don’t… I don’t fucking know! “
“WHAT!”
“I thought that was IMPLIED!!!”
“IT WAS NOT IMPLIED!!!” He yelled back. They both stared at each other.
“Uh, okay, um, what if I like, put something else in there alongside it, and like, push down against you, and then slide it out bit by bit like that???” He offered, reaching into a drawer and pulling out a cylindrical metal rod with rounded blunt ends, a sound used for prince albert piercings.
“I mean, that seems like it would work.” Ezekiel said, sounding WAY calmer than Azazel felt he should be. He took the sound out of the demon’s hand and put it in his pussy, sliding it gently around and between the spikes, pushing them up and out of the way as Azazel pulled out. It took a good five minutes, but, they did it. They both breathed a sigh of relief as Baraqiel just fucking stared, slack jawed and hard as a rock.
“Are you okay???” The demon asked, examining his pussy (and the new piercing) for damage. Ezekiel reached down and touched himself, pulling his finger away and looking at it.
“I mean, it doesn’t hurt, and I don’t think I’m bleeding.” He said. “Dude, that was SICK!!! We should do that again sometime!!! Fuck, I mean, no, that would have torn me to pieces if you’d been going in and out, but they’re angled, so, going IN is fine. It seemed like that felt pretty fucking good for you, those spikes must be REALLY fucking sensitive, maybe it would feel good to shove as much as you can into me like, RIGHT as you cum? That way you’re not thrusting anymore, and you still get the feeling at like, the most important point?” He said, using hand gestures appropriately throughout his description. Azazel just fucking stared at him.
“Where did you FIND this guy?!?” He asked Baraqiel, who just shook his head. “Fuck it. Get down from there. Turn around. I was gonna have you get on your knees so I could cum all over your cute new piercings but, no, fuck that,” He said, getting up on the piercing table as Ezekiel got down, then helping him back up into his lap, facing Baraqiel directly and facing away from Azazel. “You wanna be creampied so bad??? I’ll give it to you, yeah?”
“Fuck yeah,” Ezekiel replied, trying his best to lift up his hips to allow the demon entry.
“Reach up, grab the horns. They’re gonna be your only anchor point,” He said, and Ezekiel obeyed. He was glad he did, as the demon behind him started fucking him as soon as he was able to reach down and line up his dick with his pussy with an almost imperceptibly shaky hand. He held the human's hips and moved him to his liking; deep, hard, calculated thrusts that just barely kept him off the spikes. Azazel rested his face against Ezekiel’s shoulder as he fucked him, rocking his hips up into the man.
“This is just fucking cruel!” The demon in the chair complained, “You said it was the cuck chair, does that not imply I can at least jerk off???”
“It does not,” Azazel said, reaching up with one hand to grope Ezekiel’s tits, pulling at his new piercing. “I can feel you getting close, boything, fuck, there you go, you’re taking it so well…”
“Fuck, please, just a little faster!” Ezekiel pleaded as he approached the edge. The demon behind him pressed soft kisses to his neck, ghosting his sharp teeth over his delicate flesh as he honored that request, increasing his pace just a bit and enjoying the way Ezekiel reacted, keening towards the demon lord and whimpering softly.
“You can’t be serious!” Baraqiel argued.
“I’m serious.” Azazel confirmed. “Unless you want to pay up.”
“I’m gonna cum!” Ezekiel said, not listening to the extraneous conversation at all.
“Go ahead, boything. Cum for me, yeah? Cum on my cock, right in front of our client…” He reached down and toyed with Ezekiel’s dick piercing, tugging on it just a tiny little bit as he attempted to help him over the edge. The human came hard, losing his grip on Azazel’s horns and having to be held up instead as his orgasm rocked him. The demon held him close to his chest as he fucked him through his orgasm, cumming a few seconds after Ezekiel to the feeling of his cunt twitching with the aftershocks. He didn’t spike the poor human a second time, but still filled him up pretty good, reveling in the jealous expression on Baraqiel’s face as he painted the human’s walls. He closed his eyes tight and held Ezekiel closer, evidently not being one for being loud during sex. Cum noticeably dripped from the human’s pussy almost immediately; Ezekiel was starting to detect a theme here. Angels and demons seemed to cum a LOT, volume wise. “F-fuck, good boy… you really are a fun toy to play with. I think I’ll have to make you an appointment for four weeks out. Jewelry change.”
“I-I thought you said they were all healed??” Ezekiel said. “Can’t I change it myself?”
“Shhh. Shut up. I wanna see your cunt again, take the compliment and go.” The demon said, picking him up and setting him down on shaky legs. “Get your clothes on, boything. I’ll text you the aftercare instructions.”
“Can I move NOW??” Baraqiel asked, as Ezekiel picked up his wet boxers off the demon’s shoulder.
“Wait until he’s dressed. Then go ahead.” Azazel said, smirking as he put his clothes back on. Ezekiel dressed quickly, trying not to keep Baraqiel waiting, realizing that the demon was his only way out of hell. The second his shirt was over his head, Baraqiel grabbed him, threw him over his shoulder, and stormed out of the room.
“Bye, Azazel!!” Ezekiel called out, waving. “See you in four weeks!”
“If you can wait that long! Lord knows Baraqiel doesn’t care if his partner cums!” He shouted back, very pleased with himself.
“I fucking HATE you!” Baraqiel yelled over his shoulder, rounding the corner and slamming the door to the studio and continuing on a direct path out of the building.
“Hi,” Ezekiel said, immensely turned on right now.
“The INSTANT we get back to Earth,” Baraqiel said, “I will be balls deep in that wet little cunt of yours. You fucked up. You REALLY fucked up.”
“I dunno, I mean, you willingly sat down in the cuck chair, I don’t know what you were expecting.” Ezekiel teased. “You know, I can walk on my own.”
“You’re not gonna be able to soon. I am going to knot you, I’m gonna knot you SO fucking good…” He said, ignoring Ezekiel’s comment.
“Would you believe me if I told you that isn’t the first time I’ve heard that from a Throne?”
“Good, then you won’t need me to be gentle,” He responded.

# Watchers Gone Wild Gangbang Orgy Planning: Prophet Edition

Azazel>> I changed my mind. I want in.

Chapter Text

Isaiah had been in the hospital for five days now. With Aethriel’s (admittedly subpar for an angel) healing skills, he was healing at a rapidly accelerated rate, and had been extubated on day 3. Edon and Ezekiel came to visit occasionally, giving Aethriel updates about the new place, which they started calling the Chapel. Edon was worried about the Seraph and insisted it needed to go to the Chapel and change back into its angelic form, as it had been in the hospital this entire time refusing to change back.
“You are going to get stuck like that!” Edon said, “And I do not want to have to un-stick you! It is not easy or fun!”
“I do not TRUST you to watch over him!!!” It insisted, “What if something were to happen?!”
“I'm in the hospital, Aethriel!! If something happens, a nurse or a doctor will be there. I'm gonna be okay.” He reassured it. “You should go home, all of you. Get some rest.” Isaiah insisted. Aethriel looked unhappy and resolute in its decision to stay.
“If you REALLY think it needs a chaperone, I can stay too.” Ezekiel offered. “That way you've got a human and an angel here instead of you.”
“...You are really okay with this?” Aethriel asked Isaiah.
“Yes!!! I've been telling you for days to go home and get some rest. I feel bad that you're hurting yourself like this, angelface!” He reached out to touch its face with his left arm, the less injured one.
“I don't appreciate how you all keep saying I need supervision!!” Edon complained. “I am perfectly capable of sitting there and doing nothing, just like you!!”
“You did make some… comments, to say the least, at one of the chaplains last time we came here.” Ezekiel reminded it.
“She was dressed all wrong!!!” It argued, “And that rosary WAS ugly, and someone DID need to tell her.”
“No, the OTHER chaplain,” Ezekiel said, “The one you had to be physically restrained from biting? You told him he was a failure of a mortal and that hell was too good for him??”
“He started it!”
“This does not inspire confidence in me,” The Seraph stated, covering its eyes.
“It’ll be fine.” Isaiah said, “Nothing weird is gonna happen for at least the next 8 hours. Go to the Chapel, check out the loft they made for you, stretch your pretty wings, get some rest.” Isaiah coaxed, squeezing its hand.
“...Okay. Fine. But if I come back here and Isaiah is any worse off, I will… I will…. I do not know what I will do, but you are NOT going to like it!” It threatened, taking the keys from Ezekiel and standing up. It was still wearing the clothing the chaplain had given it, and it was now heavily stained with blood. “Is there a good place around here to get naked?”
“Directly outside the emergency room,” Edon offered. “Nobody even turned their head when I did it there last time.”
“...You know what? I will just let these clothes be ripped to shreds. I do not want them touching my body anymore.” It said. It leaned down to give Isaiah a kiss goodbye, promised to be back very soon, and left.
Ezekiel and Edon had brought a deck of cards, and they played for a little while and talked about the Chapel. Ezekiel and Edon (and occasionally Baraqiel) had really set it up nicely, if the pictures on Ezekiel’s phone were anything to go by. Everything was still in its beginning phases, given that it had only been five days, but, they'd started ripping pews out of the top rows of the old church already to make a big loft area. They'd sorted through most of the shit that the old owners had left in the offices (and gotten rid of most of it by burning it in the now-functional fireplace. Edon had reservations about burning holy books in a fire, but Baraqiel had reminded it that the alternative was going to be doing the right thing and finding a thrift store that would take hundreds of copies of the same book off their hands no questions asked. Edon had been the first to light up a bible after that.) Ezekiel bought a microwave and an air fryer for the kitchen. They fixed the refrigerator, and they'd also gotten the electricity working in the place, which had been an ordeal. They'd also set up a wheelchair ramp, anticipating a need for such a device after Isaiah explained how long it was going to take until he was healed enough to even get fitted for a prosthetic much less actually receive one. In addition to all this, Edon had discovered a tub in the basement which it seemed like was previously used for baptisms, which the beings had been using as a place to bathe.
“Hey, I'm getting hungry. I'm gonna go down to the cafeteria and get some food, do you guys want anything?” Ezekiel asked around dinner time.
“Nah, they're bringing me food already.” Isaiah said, “Edon?”
“Can you get me a chocolate milk with ice in it?” Edon asked. Ezekiel sighed. This was becoming a common request and he wasn't sure if he should be fueling this desire it had.
“...No. I can get you some chocolate milk though.”
“... FINE.” it said, crossing its arms. Isaiah winked at it so as to communicate that he would provide the ice. Ezekiel went downstairs. He kind of wanted a muffin from the coffee place, so after getting a chocolate milk and a sandwich, he stood in line at the coffee shop.
Not thirty seconds after he got in the admittedly pretty long line, a doctor who'd gotten in line right after him tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around.
“Hi, lovely!” They said, in a voice that Ezekiel took a little bit of offense to. They sounded like they were talking down to him, like just because he wasn't a doctor he must be stupid. “I'm just going to step ahead of you, I'm very busy you see-”
“Hey, man, that's not cool.” He said. “Listen I get that you're busy, okay, I mean you clearly work here. But like. This is a crowded coffee place at a busy time. Don't you guys have coffee machines in like, your break room or something, if you're that busy? Or have like, I don't know, a nurse to send??”
“You fail to understand how important I am.” The doctor said, pointing to their badge. It looked… it looked really outdated, honestly. It looked different from the badges the other doctors had. It had a picture of the physician on it though, and if he squinted he could definitely tell it was from this hospital. It just looked really old, had that yellowish tinge that white plastic gets after a while. It said ‘Dr. Avery Jordan’ and there was a big green stripe at the bottom that said PHYSICIAN in big block letters. They had these striking green eyes that looked like they were staring directly into Ezekiel’s soul, and they had shoulder length wavy hair tied back with a headband to keep it out of their face. They were a natural redhead, it looked like, and had some accent Ezekiel really couldn't place, kind of like Edon’s, if he was being honest. They were very short, like, maybe five foot even, and wearing hospital issue operating room scrubs as well as a scrub jacket. From what Isaiah had told him about surgeons, they were acting like a surgeon.
“Yeah well, honestly, I don't care how important you are. You're being an asshole. We're both just humans, nobody's really better than anyone else.” They stared at him through their emerald green rectangular glasses, looking like they were resisting the urge to punch him.
“I have shit to do after this. You do not. I do not get the opportunity to come to these places often. You do. Let me in front of you.”
“You have no idea what I'm doing after this!!! It may as well be your fucking dad, how about that?”
“I do NOT have time for this! You need to adjust your damn attitude!!!” They announced, turning away from Ezekiel and walking off in the other direction towards the main elevators. That was weird, Ezekiel thought. He waited in line for like five minutes or so, got a muffin and chocolate milk, and headed back up to the room. It took a while for him to do this, as there was some sort of crisis happening directly inside the hospital entrance and the whole place was swarming with activity. Seemed like someone’s heart stopped as they were walking in the door.
In the elevator, it hit him. WAIT!!!! That doctor… that doctor was DEFINITELY a fucking angel! What the fuck?! Well… I mean… I guess that kind of makes sense? But like… why??? Why the fuck would God send an angel to cure disease when He could have just not caused the disease in the first place???
When he finally got back up, Isaiah looked extremely upset and almost completely healed, and was yelling at someone over the phone. Edon was gone entirely.

+++

“Hello, I'm Dr. Jordan, I'm with the soft tissue and burns team down in the… operating… room…” The doctor said the first half of that sentence in a rush as they barged into the room, but trailed off at the end as they looked up from their extremely gaudy, rhinestone - studded clipboard and locked eyes with Edon. Edon had frozen in place the second it saw the doctor, dropping the roll of tape it has been fucking around with out of what Isaiah interpreted as surprise.
“Um, hi.” Isaiah said. “I thought I already saw the burn team today…? I told them I didn't want to be in the study, I'm sorry, it's uh, it's for religious reasons-”
“Stop talking to me.” They said pulling an ornate spray bottle out of their weird little pink doctor bag, coming up to Isaiah and spraying some watery pink substance all over him. They ripped off his hospital gown and bandages to do this, covering every injured part of him, and then saying something under their breath that Isaiah did not understand. “Congratulations, you’re cured.” They said, turning around. “You. Up. Now.” It pointed at Edon.
“...Me?” Edon said, feigning confusion quite poorly. Isaiah tried moving his broken arm that had previously been too painful to use, and he was surprised to see that it moved much more easily now. It wasn’t back to 100%, but, he was able to move it. The burns on his skin were fading into scar tissue before his eyes, slowly, but surely. What the FUCK?!?!
“Edon, I swear to God, I will wipe the memory of every fucking human in this hospital CLEAN and drag you out of here by your weird fucked up balls if you don't stand up right now, follow me, and act natural.” They said, switching languages over to Latin so Isaiah couldn't understand them. He definitely understood that this doctor seemed to know Edon’s name, though.
“I don't know what you're saying,” Edon said in English, “You are a bad doctor, did you even graduate from medical-”
“EDON!!! I KNOW it's you, you're the ONLY “human” in a ten mile radius that is missing that eye AND sitting like THAT in a chair!!” They replied, sounding extremely upset although Isaiah had no idea what they were talking about.
“Sitting like what?!” It replied in English.
“Like you're not used to having legs, dumbass! Get up before I make you get up!” They opened up the front of their scrub jacket and, alarmingly, flashed what looked to Isaiah like a fucking gun. On its 2nd hospital visit, Edon had recounted to a still intubated Isaiah the story of how it had gotten a gun held to its head during a robbery when coming back to the chapel. It told Isaiah that it had to pretend to be afraid and felt like it did a bad job, saying something about how human built bullets don't do shit to an angel. But this time, it looked VERY afraid. That must not be a normal gun. Edon held its hands up. “Stop acting like a fucking fool!!!! Let’s GO!”
Arseni left the room with Edon at gunpoint.
“Your grace-”
“SAVE IT for the flight!” Arseni said, navigating them through the hallways, out of the hospital, and into a random alleyway. “Strip. Now.”
“I-I!!! I don’t want to!!” It said, crossing its arms and walking backwards until it hit the brick wall. The Cherub pointed the barrel of the gun at its head. Tears began to fall from its eye, as it slowly pulled off its shirt and pants and stood there shivering, naked and afraid.
“We’re going back to Heaven and we’re going there NOW, we only have TWO HOURS before the stupid fucking All Ophanim Council Meeting, and you’re GOING. I don’t care WHAT extra work you picked up to get out of it, I HAVE to be there and I NEED my Throne.” It said, stripping out of its clothing and folding it up to shove it in its bag, which now looked like a backpack instead of the doctor’s bag it had been in the hospital.
“What??” Edon seemed confused.
“The MEETING!!! How the fuck did you even get approved for fucking hospital visitor duties at THIS time of year?! Was it Metabelle? It must have been fucking Metabelle. Why the FUCK would you go back to her?! I know the meeting SUCKS but not THAT bad, especially considering your history with her-” It saw that Edon was holding back tears. “Why the fuck are you crying?”
“I… I thought…” It cried, “I thought you were going to try and- and…!”
“You thought I was gonna- EDON!!!! What the FUCK makes you think I’d… Why would I even want to…???” It sighed, sounding disgusted, as it changed forms back to its true form. It felt good to be back, it stretched its wings and picked up its backpack, still holding the gun and pointing it directly at the Throne. “Well??? Change forms!!! Let’s fucking go!!!”
Arseni ranted at Edon the entire flight about a lot of things, but especially how upset it was that Edon hadn’t reported back to it and had instead just “found other duties.” It was upset because, Edon gathered, its perception was that Edon had failed to find the target, given up, and then been so fearful of punishment for failure that it hadn’t had the balls to come tell that to Arseni. It was upset because it had been pretty specific earlier that it REALLY needed the Throne at the council meeting, and it felt like Edon didn’t understand that and was just fucking around. It… it had NO idea what it had been up to. It had NO idea that Isaiah was the “target”. That had been an incredibly close call.
“My apologies, Your Grace…” It said, looking away. “I… I was just so worried you would want me felled…”
“Honestly, Edon, have I even once given you the idea that I’d want you felled for anything??? You’re a damn good Throne, I like you, stop being so fucking paranoid!!! What IS gonna get you felled someday is how you don’t seem to understand that when angels go missing on Earth, it’s USUALLY because they’re fucking a human. You can’t just leave your post like that, angels will start getting ideas!!” Panic rose through Edon’s wheels at that comment.
“I-I would never!!” It argued, “Humans are disgusting! I’d never look at a human like that, I do not even understand how they manage to mate with each other, I cannot imagine wanting to grab some human’s weird soft flesh and stick my-”
“Okay, okay. You are laying it on a LITTLE thick there, you don’t have to give me the details…” It said.
“Um… what were YOU doing on Earth?” It asked.
“OH, you want to know? Oh, get ready, because THIS is a story…” Arseni explained how it had asked another Throne to come to Earth and kill Isaiah, but how it had become confused by some demonic forces and decided to just start blasting, “In an IDIOTIC attempt to earn my favor… suffice to say, I was very upset with her. I had to come down here to heal the several innocent humans she errantly almost killed, because this whole situation is just getting so far out of hand, and because Raphael has taken interest in it and wants a report from me at this stupid meeting. I can’t just show up reporting serious casualties and huge missteps under MY command, this is RAPHAEL we’re talking about, he’ll go ballistic! So just keep this little Earth visit between you and me, okay? I am not going to report to him about Sebl’s involvement… just trust me, it will be better if we brush that whole house fire fiasco under the rug…”
“Raphael?? The ARCHANGEL Raphael?” Edon repeated, “He… he is involved in this case now?? Why, if it is just one sinful human? That human will die in just a few years, the problem will solve itself!” It hoped that would do SOMETHING to push Arseni off the trail.
“You would think, right? But no, he is VERY interested. He sent me a document talking about how he has reason to believe there is serious demonic involvement here, but I don’t know. I just don’t think that is the case. If there was demonic involvement past, say, a cloaking spell pulled by some demon wanting to pull a fast one on us and protect this supposed human because he corrupted a Seraph and they think that’s cool, I think I would know. I do not even know if there IS a human, this just seems like demonic activity to me... It is just not a big deal anyway, I mean, it wasn’t even an upper heavens Seraph!! Seraphim from those lower edges are always doing some fuck shit…” It said. Edon pretended to agree. “God, I am sorry about getting so upset earlier… I just… fuck… I need you to come with me, and I am frustrated that you tried to skimp out on me like that.... I CANNOT face Raphael alone, not this year, not this… situation...”
“...May I ask why, Your Grace?” Edon asked. “You do this every time Raphael is involved in anything you do, why did you choose to work under him as a direct report if you are THIS afraid of him?”
“Ugh… Edon, you are just too innocent. You wouldn’t understand.” Arseni said.
“I am your Throne,” It said, “You can tell me anything. I am here to support you in all things.” It really wanted this intel. It could tell this was something that was really eating at the Cherub, it was kind of freaking Edon out.
“...I really would love to tell you, but…” It sighed. “It is one of those THINGS, Edon, we’ve talked about this. Us higher ups… there is a little BENDING of the rules, when you get to the upper heavens, and… it just… it freaks out the lower angels. I would not want you to get the wrong idea…”
“I truly doubt you could tell me anything that would ‘freak me out’, Your Grace. I mean, you see that I am not innocent, either; I have a missing eye, it did not just fall out on its own.” It offered.
“You never did tell me that story.” It said, curiosity seeping into its voice. “I will be honest, I tried to search your court records, but nothing came up for the Wrath in Heaven council at all, not Envy or Greed or Sloth either…”
“Well, you must understand, your Grace,” Edon responded, “Us lower angels, we get a bit nervous talking about our scars with the higher ups. I would not want you to get the wrong IDEA about me…”
“Ah, I see, using my own words against me, are you?” It looked at Edon’s empty eye socket. While it did so, it also noticed something it hadn’t before. Bite marks, SERAPH bite marks, indented into its wheels. They looked mostly healed, same as the eye socket… It wasn’t an expert in Throne healing times, but… maybe those injuries were related?? “You tell me about that eye, and maybe I’ll tell you about, um. My HISTORY, shall we say, with Raphael…”
“That sounds fair to me,” Said Edon. My files are public record anyhow, it is not like I can get in any MORE trouble than I already am… “I, um… a few decades ago, at the All Ophanim Council Meeting, um… There was, ah, a Seraph. He took an interest in me, and asked me to dance, and, um… One thing led to another… and… I was convicted of lust.” It said. It looked up at Arseni, who looked shocked, to say the least.
“Oh, Edon!! I never would have thought that YOU…” It said, at a loss for words for a moment, “Edon, you dirty dog! And here I was, not even bothering to search the Lust records for your file. I wouldn’t have thought YOU of all angels could pull a SERAPH! I was about to say, what, did you drug his wine?!” Arseni joked. “How did you even convince him?”
“Well,” It said, not sure if it should even continue. “Not to contradict you, Your Grace, but, CONVINCE is, um… strong wording… it… um… I did not ask for it to do what it… did.” It said, slowly. “The entire situation was very confusing and painful.”
“What, you mean like, he touched you against your will?” The Cherub asked.
“...Yes, your Grace.” It said.
“Oh. OH, my lovely, I am so sorry!” It almost stopped short mid air. “I, oh, I thought…. I thought you two got caught making out, or something, I… I didn’t think… Wait, how did YOU get convicted of lust, then?!” The Cherub asked.
“Look, I do not know! You can look up my file yourself, if you want…” It grumbled, really not wanting to talk about this. “If you ask me, it was because of Metabelle wanting to save face, and that stupid new graduate Virtue council member wanting to kiss ass and get in her good graces…” It always did like when Edon complained about Metabelle, so it didn’t really understand why Arseni seemed so unamused.
“You mean Tahir?” It asked.
“Yeah, that is his name. He looked me in my EYES and called me an abominable sinner, and personally pushed for a harsher punishment…”
“I was… unaware of this…” Arseni said, sounding very, very unhappy. Edon realized it may have said too much.
“My apologies, your Grace!!!” It quickly replied, “It was all my fault, really, you can look up the file, I am just… I am just making it seem worse than it was! I led him on, I thought terrible sinful lustful things about him, it was all very justified, I am sure the council made the correct decision, I deserved it!”
“I will look up the file.” Arseni said, very simply. “I… I am conflicted, is all. I know Tahir quite well, I just… I did not think he would… do something like that. I’ve seen him on the council, he does usually try to defend the truly innocent…” That was not something that inspired confidence in the Throne. It felt like it was about to vomit. It considered for a moment just turning around now, saying fuck all of this, fuck trying to keep a low profile, and returning to Earth. Maybe it could beg Baraqiel for some sort of protection??? It wanted the house back, it wanted its little spot in the garage, it wanted some chocolate milk with ice in it. It was starting to understand what Aethriel was talking about when it said that it just needed to be held for a while after one of its nightmares. Edon felt like it was living a nightmare right now, and it wanted so badly to be back under a blanket in the loft of the chapel, curled up with Ezekiel next to the fire, or out on the porch at the old house passing a joint back and forth with him and looking at the night sky… yet it had no choice but to fly forwards if it wanted to protect him. If it turned back now, Ezekiel could get fucking killed. They were almost back in Heaven.
As they approached the gates, Edon realized that Arseni had not even told it any information at all. It had just told that story for absolutely nothing. It cursed itself for thinking that Arseni was actually going to keep its damn word for once and explain something in a way that made any sense…
The All Ophanim Council Meeting was held in a truly titanic meeting hall. As the name suggests, all (or, almost all) of the Ophanim were there in attendance. There were also a decent amount of Cherubim, and a good deal of Seraphim, as God was supposed to be there to do a blessing and that asshole doesn’t go anywhere without His yes men. Edon took a deep breath in, closing its eyes and trying to pretend like it was anywhere else. It hated this fucking meeting with a passion, and tried to get out of it every single year. Arseni usually granted this request for it, which it truly did appreciate, but that also meant it had been a good ten years since it had to actually attend one of these. It felt dizzy. It felt sick.
“Stay close to me,” Arseni commanded. Its voice almost shook. “I… I do not know when Raphael will come to collect me. I want you to come with me when he does.”
“Yes, your Grace.” It said, more out of familiarity than anything else. Besides, the LAST thing it wanted to do was leave the side of pretty much the only angel in heaven it actually held mostly positive feelings towards, especially not one with as much power as Arseni. No one would try to talk to it, it hoped… it was a VERY asocial angel baseline, and its experiences with this meeting were not making that much better. “Ugh… I forgot how bad the music was in Heaven.” It said before it could stop itself. “I-I mean, I don’t like this song.” It was a very typical, very long, very preachy Seraph song about God, which to be perfectly honest was pretty much the only type of music there really was in Heaven.
“How much music could you possibly have heard in that hospital??” Arseni asked.
“Um! I mean!!! That human I was watching over… he listened to a lot of human music.”
“What type?” Arseni asked, weaving through the crowd to try and get to a spot that would be non-obvious. For once, it was glad it was short for a Cherub; that would make it pretty hard to see.
“Lots of types…”
“What’s your FAVORITE type?” The Cherub pried. “I am intrigued, I really thought you were such a square before this little Earth trip!!”
“I already told you I did not even WANT what that Seraph-”
“Edon, you were gone for two weeks! I thought you went Watcher on me! That is pretty clearly what I was referring to!!” Arseni cut it off, trying to keep its voice down. “You’re talking about secular human music at a public meeting, for Christssake! Just forget it…” It said, “We’re gonna have a talk later.”
Much to Arseni’s displeasure (and Edon’s relief, honestly,) Raphael found them VERY quickly, right after God blessed all the Ophanim and re-counted them, numbering them among the angels for another year. There was a short break from standing still and listening to long speeches then, where the Ophanim were supposed to be purified in divine fire to symbolize some kind of spiritual purity and renewal, but Edon REALLY didn’t want to do that. The fire burned its empty eye socket pretty fucking badly, it had come to find.
Before it went to get in line, Raphael came up behind Arseni and grabbed its shoulder. It jolted and spun around, placing its own hand on the spot on its shoulder that the archangel touched almost as if that contact had burned.
“Your Grace!” It said, “Oh, so lovely to see you! I, um, I heard you wanted to speak to me…?” It sounded very anxious.
“Yes, follow me.” He said, turning and walking through the crowd. Arseni motioned at Edon to follow them as they weaved between angels and eventually made their way to an exit. Raphael had to explain to the guards that Arseni was in fact permitted to leave for them to let it out.
“Halt!” One of the door guards said, holding its spear in Edon’s way. “You are not permitted to leave!”
“It’s with me.” Arseni said. “Allow it through, it has permission.”
“What? Why do you need your Throne?” Raphael asked. “I don’t need to talk to it. Just you. Leave it here.”
“Ah, um, actually!!! You probably DO want to talk to Edon! See, Edon is involved in the case as well, we’ve been working on it quite closely together!” Arseni lied, and Edon really did throw up in its mouths a little at that. This was really, really bad.
“I see. Very well then, let it through.” Edon made a mental note to beat the shit out of Arseni when they got to hell, if they even survived the fall…
Raphael’s office was located very close to the throne room, up just a little further on this mountain than the meeting hall they’d just come from. If Arseni’s office looked ornate, this place looked like a palace. It was absolutely decked out in gold, gemstones, precious metals, intricate rugs and woodwork. It honestly looked a lot like the universe’s most gaudy doctor’s office, if doctors offices had ceilings made from crystal fractals and fire.
The Archangel sat behind the ridiculously ornate mahogany desk at the back of the room and looked down at the two angels in front of him.
“Please, do elaborate about the Throne’s involvement with this case.” The Archangel said.
“Um, well, your Grace, I sent Edon to Earth to investigate the area of concern… it came back with nothing.” Arseni said. Edon stared at the Cherub with fury in its eyes. WHY would you throw me to the wolves like that?!?! it thought at the Cherub. Arseni tried to correct itself. “But neither did any of the other Ophanim I sent, nor the Virtue who I sent undercover!!! That Virtue was quite good, too, very high test scores, sits on the Sexual Immorality Council, very, um, very virtuous, righteous, very holy… Still, nothing. I posit that there may be a bit of demonic involvement, but, I do not suspect anything major.” It explained.
“And you do not find it suspicious that four Ophanim and a Virtue could not even locate one human being, after WEEKS of searching, in an incredibly non-densely populated area???” The Archangel argued. “There is clearly something significant happening here, and, to be perfectly honest with you I would have thought you of all Cherubim would have seen it.”
“Well, I do think there’s something SIGNIFICANT, but, I mean. Is there any possibility it could be just some bored demons fucking with us?” Arseni said. “That is what it honestly seems like to me. I am unsure, honestly, if there is even a human involved at all. I thought initially that perchance a human obtained a demonic amulet or charm of some kind and used it to tempt a wayward Seraph, since it was one of the lower heavens Seraphim that come to Earth from time to time for, you know…”
“What do I know?” Raphael said, seeming very tense.
“Y’know, like, the lower heavens Seraphim that come down to Earth to get drunk? They supply like, fifty percent or more of the underground wine market?”
“What are you talking about?” The Archangel asked.
“You didn’t know about this?” Arseni asked, heart dropping to its stomach. Oh shit. That wasn’t common knowledge? Was it not supposed to tell anyone that??
“No, I did not know about this- you are telling me there are SERAPHIM involved in the illegal alcohol trade?! And angels just know about this?!”
“I mean… I thought everyone knew!”
“ARSENI!!! Why did you not tell me sooner?!” Raphael raged, shoving random paperwork and scrolls off his desk in anger as his flames rose higher. Edon was very, very unhappy to be here, and honestly would have taken the dip in the divine fire over having to be here right now.
“I thought you already knew!!! I mean, you yourself are involved in the wine market, I didn’t think you’d even care!!”
“NOT in front of the Throne!!!” The archangel shouted, pinching the bridges of two of his four noses in frustration. “We will have a SEPARATE conversation about this, ALONE… those fucking lower than dirt Seraphim are taking MY FUCKING market… GODDAMNIT!!! IF I’d known I’d have gone inquisition on their asses AGES ago! I’m going to have to get Uriel involved and everything…. This is a nightmare…” He scribbled something down. Arseni swallowed nervously. This was already off to a really bad start.
“So… the case…” Arseni said, trying to keep them on track.
“Yes, the case… ugh… okay, why do you not think a human is involved?”
“Because we came up with nothing.” Arseni said. “If there was a human involved, I assure you, we would have found him.”
“Then what the fuck happened to that Seraph?!”
“Maybe it defected?” Arseni said, pulling out a scroll from its bag and setting it down on the desk. Raphael opened it up, and Edon caught a glimpse of the name on the file: Aethriel. It could barely make that out, but, Aethriel had been trying to teach it to read Hebrew… “That Seraph certainly went through a lot of punishment, it was probably torture to stay flying at all on that wing. Look at the images, that lash struck bone!”
“That can’t be it. Any reasonable angel thinks that God sees all, it would know its fate would be punishment and death. Seraphim are too smart for that. Maybe a messenger, MAYBE a particularly stupid Virtue or a Power... But a Seraph?? No. There have not been any voluntary Seraph defections in a VERY long time. They are all FAR too afraid, they know they’d be hunted down and tortured to death...”
“Maybe it had a death wish,” Edon offered. “Maybe it is already dead. Maybe it reached Earth, attracted demonic attention, and was struck down. That would explain the demonic activity, too.” It offered. “I am unfamiliar with your detection technology, but, I would assume the destruction of a Seraph would give off a lot of… demonic energy… or whatever.”
“...You may be correct, Edon…” Raphael said, looking over the scroll. “In all honesty it shocks me this Seraph was not felled a long time ago. Most angels would be horrendously non-functional drunks by the time they racked up this much of a record, and it seems like the first offense was a pretty major one.”
“It was made an example out of.” Edon said, before it could stop itself.
“Exactly. You… you really read deep into this, Edon, I'm impressed!” Edon respectfully closed its eyes and tipped forward in a bow, not sure how to explain to Raphael that it couldn't even read the Hebrew that the Seraph’s file was written in, nor could it read anything at all past roughly a 2nd or 3rd grade level in archaic Latin, its own name and the names of its friends in Hebrew, and a few sight words in English. “That is some high level theological theory for a Throne. Please go on.”
“Uh… um… the Seraph…” it tried its best to remember the story as Aethriel had told it, and then tried to put itself in the mind of what Raphael would want to hear, “it… it made a major misstep, and should have been destroyed for its arrogance. But the Lord decided mercifully to keep it alive as an example to the other Seraphim to… um… be… good. Be unwavering in their faith and dedication.” Arseni looked at Edon in surprise. How the fuck did it know about this?!
“We will talk later, Edon.” Raphael said. “But, I think that… that may settle it then…” He looked back over at the note he'd made about the whole illegal alcohol thing and sighed. “I mean, it does make sense that the Seraph may be dead. I am not going to close the case entirely, demonic technology sufficient to DESTROY a Seraph, no matter how wayward, abhorrent, and useless, needs to be investigated. But that would be more of Kushiel’s intelligence department, not mine… I will speak with him about it. He may send some teams to the area at some point to take readings…” That name definitely rung a bell with Edon and it made a note to keep that information in its mind if it was able to transmit any information back to Earth.
God, it hoped it would be able to get back to Earth, and soon. It had only been back in Heaven for a few hours and it was already almost at its limit of how long it could keep up an act like this. Besides, it would go into another rut in about two weeks, and that was NOT going to be fun to deal with in Heaven.
“Of course, Your Grace. Do you need anything else from me?” Arseni asked, wanting to get the fuck out of here immediately right now.
“Yes. We need to talk about this… wine thing…” Raphael said, shifting a few scrolls around the desk. “Without your Throne present.”
“A-are you sure? I mean, it, um, it is likely… aware… of the situation to some extent too, it may be able to offer helpful insight!!!” Arseni suggested.
“Edon, leave my office.” Raphael commanded. Edon left the office, noticing the look of despair of Arseni’s face that screamed ‘Please don't leave me alone with him!’
Raphael's office was soundproof. Edon could hear nothing as it hovered outside the door, but as the hours dragged on, it started to feel a little bad for Arseni. At the very least, it must be getting yelled at in there. Of course Edon was aware of the wine trade; once it started working for Arseni it was very involved with transactions of that nature, being sent out as a courier to pick up new supply from whatever Seraph Arseni told it to go to.
…Wait. Should it be warning them??? Maybe it should… God and the big dog important Seraphim wouldn't even be in the throne room right now anyway, the lower Seraphim were left alone up there and it would be able to talk to at least some of them… It took off towards the throne room. It will be a quick trip, in and out in twenty minutes… it promised itself.
Entering the throne room through a small door built for lower angels, Edon was a little shocked at the absolute pandemonium that was happening there. A lot of the Seraphim were asleep or resting, perched on the throne itself or laying on the ground. Empty and partially empty wine barrels and bottles were strewn about the floor. The wheelwork Ophanim were gone entirely, no longer stationed at the base of the throne. It was silent in the room except for chatter among the angels, nobody was singing. There were not that many Seraphim in the air, but those that were seemed to be in pairs or trios, locking talons and swinging each other around like eagles do when they mate as they fell down towards the base of the throne…
Edon looked around for any Seraphim it personally knew. It garnered a few confused looks from a few Seraphim as it passed by, but, it assumed that was because they assumed it was a wheelwork Throne somehow skipping out on the Ophanim Council Meeting. Edon flew around to the back of the throne and finally encountered two Seraphim it actually had done business with alongside Arseni; Cardamom and Persimmon. They were making out next to an empty wine cask. Edon didn't really know what to do about that, and so elected to just stand there until they noticed it. Unbeknownst to Edon, neither Seraph could even see it from where it was hovering, and they were both tipsy and horny enough that they were not paying attention to anything other than each other.
“It has been so long,” Cardamom whispered as the two angels pulled away from each other, connected by a thin string of saliva.
“Too long,” Persimmon replied, and they came together again, Persimmon pushing two of its tongues into Cardamom’s mouth. They were REALLY going at it, Edon noted, and honestly at this point it was not sure if continuing to watch would be weirder, or making itself known now would be weirder.
“I cannot believe I survived my heat last month without you,” Cardamom said when they parted once more, “I felt like I would simply burn up.”
“I feel the same,” Persimmon replied, “It was torture knowing you were so close to me, flying by my side and we could not do anything until this damn meeting! Every time we pass by each other I am just thinking, oh, God, how badly I want to fornicate with you! The way you looked at me with those pleading eyes, I bet you were FIGHTING to keep yourself inverted…”
“Please, I need you to fuck me!” Cardamom pleaded, “Enough with the foreplay, we can kiss again after!!”
“Say less,” The smaller Seraph replied, giving Cardamom one last kiss before shuffling their positions around a little bit so that she could mount her. Persimmon pulled up her tail feathers to allow Cardamom access, and Edon watched as they stabilized in their chosen position, rubbing their cloacae together. Their cocks intertwined as they did this, everting and wrapping around one another, sliding against each other and squeezing together as the two angels mated. Edon hovered there awkwardly until they both came, pretty damn quickly, and collapsed into a pile together, dicks still entwined, face to face, kissing one another hungrily and whispering praises and “I love you”s.
Both jumped almost out of their skin when they heard Edon’s fake throat clearing sound.
“EDON?! What are YOU doing here?!” Cardamom exclaimed. Persimmon closed her eyes tightly, not wanting to look at all this. “W-were you watching the whole time?!?!”
“I… uh… I am here to deliver a message…” It said. “Um… you didn’t hear this from me, but, if I were you I would not do any more wine runs for a good while. Raphael knows and is upset that you lower Seraphim are cornering some of his market, he is going to call Uriel on you all.”
“You are not going to tell God, are you!?” Persimmon asked, tearfully.
“I feel as though you two are not listening to me,” Edon said, “Your little business needs to halt operations. Spread the word, please, if you value your halo.” It began to fly away.
“Wait!!! Come back!!” Cardamom yelled, “Please, please don’t tell God, we will do anything!!”
“Why the fuck would I tell God that you two are fucking each other? I might have gotten a human pregnant two weeks ago, what legs do I have to stand on?!”
“What?!” Persimmon asked. Their dicks were still entwined.
“I mean… I didn’t say anything.” Edon said. “I am not going to tell God. Just… please spread the word about Raphael’s awareness of the wine smuggling. Halt operations. Lie low.”
“Wait, wait! Back it up!” Persimmon untangled herself from her girlfriend, resting on the ground. “Is THAT why you did not pick up the latest order?? You were on Earth fucking a human?!”
“Are you not fucking behind God’s throne right now? Get off my back!” Edon exclaimed.
“No, I mean, did… did you fall?!? Does anyone else know??? Where is Arseni?”
“Arseni is getting its heads rearranged in Raphael’s office right now, which is why I know about any of this.” Edon explained. “I do not have a lot of time, and to be honest with you, I do not want to be here at all! I just want to go back to Earth!”
“Why would you want to go there?” Asked Cardamom.
“Because it does not suck nearly as bad as Heaven!!!” Edon exclaimed. “Everything here is too loud and too bright!! There’s no weed and alcohol costs an eye and a wing! Everyone is fake as hell and only cares about appearances, nothing makes any sense at all, everything always revolves around tiptoeing around God’s shitty ego problems, and sex is a crime!” Edon said. “I want to go home and fuck my favorite human and go to sleep!”
“...And you can do that, on Earth?” Persimmon asked. Cardamom looked interested, too.
“I… I mean… yeah!” Edon said. “Earth has comfortable homes, and sex, and long car rides and soup and chocolate milk and ice cubes, Earth has music that isn’t about God, and crayons, and TV, and you can lay down in front of a warm fire and sleep next to someone you actually LIKE. You can sleep every night if you want to. There is no lash to fear, you can say what YOU want, nobody makes you call them Your Grace… It is nice down there and I miss it!”
“Won’t it hurt?” Persimmon asked again. “I thought that falling hurts, and you can die!”
“Well, um, that is if you are THROWN from heaven…” Edon explained. “I just did not come back. It did not hurt for me.”
“You DEFECTED?!” Cardamom gasped. “And they did not CATCH you?!?!”
“...I… I guess I did?? Look, can you PLEASE just tell the others the thing I just said! And you did NOT hear it from me!!!” It said, turning around and flying away. It gave a similar speech to two other Seraphim it knew, before leaving the throne room and waiting again outside Raphael’s door. Thankfully, it was only another twenty minutes before the door opened, revealing a very tearful and tired looking Arseni. Edon had gotten back in plenty of time.
“Let’s go.” Arseni said, holding its arms across its chest and heading for the exit.
“What happened in there?!” Edon asked, “You were gone for hours!!!”
“I can’t talk about it.” The Cherub said. “Not… not here. Not now. Come to my office with me, we have… a few things to discuss.” The flight to the Archives was a silent one. The walk through the halls, another. On their way to Arseni’s office, they ran into Tahir, who was browsing the stacks near the Cherub's office and all but ran over to the Cherub as soon as he saw it.
“Your grace, a moment of your time,” He said, but Arseni did not break its stride, continuing down the hallway with Edon on its heels. “Your Grace?”
“If you want to talk to me, talk to my secretary,” Arseni said, “make an appointment. Or sit outside in the chairs by my door until I'm good and ready to talk to you.” It said.
“I don't understand,” Tahir said, “I… it’s… it's an… emergency…?” He sounded unsure. Arseni stopped in its tracks, clenching its fists and spinning around to face the Virtue.
“If you want to talk to me, sit in the chairs outside my office and WAIT.” It instructed.
“...I… Okay…??” Tahir responded. Edon felt itself begin to tremble before slipping into the office behind Arseni as it slammed the door.
Arseni immediately sat against the wall, sinking down into a curled up position and putting its human head in its hands.
“Are. Are you…” Edon started, “Are you going to fire me?”
“How did you know the Seraph’s file information?” Arseni asked, keeping its human head in its hands and speaking with its ox one.
“I… I read the file…” Edon claimed.
“Don’t fucking lie to me. I know you can barely read.” Arseni said.
“I can read!!!” Edon said.
“Oh yeah? What does this say?” Arseni pulled a Bible written in French off its shelf and flipped to Genesis 6:4. Edon was silent. It had no idea. “That’s what I thought. Now tell me, IS there a human involved with this, or is there not?!”
“I do not know! Why would I have any of this information!?!?” Edon responded. Arseni sighed.
“I know you disappeared while looking for that human, even though I gave you specific instructions just to go scout, and then come back right away. Tahir came back after I sent him out after you, and told me he… had an encounter… but I brushed it off, I thought there was no way, that was just a prude ass Virtue being a prude ass Virtue. I thought, there was NO way he actually found the guy. It was probably just some random human who was into lame twinks, but on the off chance he was right, I sent out another Throne...” Arseni explained. “I mean, I went back and forth on it. It was not easy to determine, and I will be honest with you, I still am not totally sure if there IS a human or not, but I trusted God, I operated under the assumption that He was right… But if there is a human, I think you found him. I think you found him, and I think you’re having sex with him. It’s that or the Seraph. Which one is it?”
“I did not find anyone.” Edon said. “I went to Earth. I looked around. I saw nothing. I became worried you would be upset with me, and I found work that would keep me on Earth to avoid your wrath.”
“When have I EVER shown wrath towards you?!” Arseni asked. “Truly!!! When?!?!”
“Earlier today you held me at gunpoint and forced me to strip.” It offered.
“OTHER than that!” Arseni asked.
“I mean to say, my fear was justified!!!”
“Look, if you’re fucking a human, please understand I don’t give a shit and I’m not going to report you.” Arseni said. “Really. I’m not. I know you probably don’t fucking trust me, and I get that too. But really. I do not care. Just tell me how you know about the Seraph.”
“I am… not going to tell you.” Edon said. “And that is final.”
“Is the Seraph actually dead?” Arseni asked. “Is there a human? How much demonic involvement is there??”
“I. Don’t. Know.” Edon said again. It blocked out every thought in its mind except for those words, desperately creating a barrier the Cherub could not penetrate with its mind reading abilities. “I think Aethriel is dead. I assume there is no human, but I have no proof.”
“How do you know its NAME?” Arseni asked. Edon wanted to hit itself.
“I will tell you NO MORE!”
“YES you WILL!!” Arseni yelled, slamming its fist into the wall. “Either you tell me what you know, or I…” It stopped. It could see the Throne trembling before it, still hovering resolute on the floor despite its trembling. “Or… or I’ll…” It couldn’t bring itself to finish that sentence. It caught a glimpse of its reflection in the shiny gold plate that hung on its wall serving as its diploma, and the faces staring back at it looked a lot like Raphael. It sighed. “Fuck… what am I doing… I'm just as bad as him.” It said, closing its eyes for a second and trying to look at its reflection again. Nope, still the fucking same. “You, uh. You must really love him, huh.”
“There is no human!” Edon said again. Arseni sat back down on the floor again in the same sad pile it had when it first walked in the door.
“I’m sorry, Edon. I’m sorry for everything. I've been a fool, a hypocrite and a fool…”
“What????” Edon asked, confused at the change of pace in this conversation.
“This case, Edon!!! It is meaningless!!!” The Cherub said, “I… I guess I felt like… I felt like it didn't matter as long as I was safe. I didn't even stop to consider whether anyone else was! I know I haven't shown it to you well, but I fucking care about you Edon, and look what I've gone and done!!!” It cried. “Who gives a shit if a lower heavens Seraph finally couldn't take it anymore!! It probably just wanted the pain to stop! If I were a good being I would have understood and covered for it! I would have… I would have just went down to Earth myself and came back and told Raphael it was fucking dead, regardless of if that was true!!! Edon… what you are doing… it is admirable. Admirable beyond measure. And I… I cannot do this anymore. I cannot keep pretending all this is OKAY. I hope that Seraph found peace in death.” It said. “I… I am sorry, Edon. I'll sign some paperwork for you so that the gate guards don't ask you any questions when you go back down to Earth, I'll give you my contact information for Azazel, he can get you numbered among the demons, fuck, I hope he picks up for you… I cannot do this anymore. I'm going to defect, and face my trial in Hell.”
“WHAT?!!?!” Edon said. “WAIT!!! Are you fucking serious?!”
“I am entirely serious.” It responded, striding over to its desk and rifling through it, pulling out a sheet of paper and writing out an excuse note for Edon in archaic latin, signing it with its too big, very flamboyant signature. “Here. Take it.” Edon reached out with an astral hand and took the paper, checking it over. Its limited ability to read was good enough to confirm that the note did excuse it to go back to the same place which it had just departed from. “I will surely be put to death in Hell, and that is truly what I deserve for what I have done. My part in all this… It is too great. I stood by and did nothing. I did not defend my friends. I did not defend Gathon, I didn’t even hesitate to testify against him to protect myself. I did not defend the innocent or the suffering. All I did was sit by and watch and distract myself and throw parties and defile Virtues and pretend like it would never come back around to me… Oh, Edon, I have done so many shitty hypocritical things… not to mention my body count is in the thousands at this point… you don’t even want to know how many Virtue’s virginities I’ve taken…”
“Arseni.” Edon said, not all that shocked that Arseni was fucking Virtues. The Cherub looked up. “What, um. What if I told you I could change that?”
“Change my deep seated and irredeemable guilt?” Arseni asked, dryly. It opened up a drawer in its desk and pulled out a pink rotary phone, dialing a number, presumably Azazel.
“No. I could… I… um… I know a way you maybe WOULDN’T be put to death in Hell. And a way you could. Um. Redeem yourself.” It said.
“What are you talking about?” It sighed, just feeling so exhausted.
“Um. Arseni…” Edon said. “Aethriel is not dead. Aethriel is no longer suffering but it is also not dead.”
“Now I know you’re fucking with me.” Arseni said. “You didn’t see that case file. That wing was FUCKED, totally dislocated, that Seraph was beaten and isolated and tortured for a thousand years.”
“You said you could call Azazel, right?” Edon said, not sure if it should do this.
“Yes.”
“Can you… can you call other numbers?”

+++

“Y’know, you’re a damn persistent telemarketer, I’ll give you that,” Ezekiel said, “What the fuck do you want?!”
“It’s Edon.” Edon said.
“EDON!!!! What!!!! Where the fuck are you??? Are you okay?!!??” Ezekiel said, “Oh, God, Edon, I thought you might have died!!! Fuck, please tell me you’re okay, I, I was so worried about you!!! I was trying to find you, I was trying to figure out how to get up to Heaven to go find you myself…”
“I… Um… I’m in Heaven…” It said, not exactly sure where to begin. “Is um. Is Aethriel there?”
“Yeah!! HEY AETHRIEL!!!” He yelled, “One sec, I think it’s in the bathtub with Isaiah right now. Let me just…” There was some shuffling sounds and footstep sounds and the sound of a door opening, and then the sounds of muffled voices. Arseni looked truly shocked. “Give it a second, Isaiah needs help getting in the wheelchair… Edon, are you safe right now? Fuck, I missed you! I’m so sorry about the chocolate milk thing, I got you a whole gallon of that pre-mixed stuff you like and I got the ice machine in the freezer working just for you, and when you get back here I’m gonna show you what a milkshake is-”
“I… yes. I’m fine.” It interrupted. “I just. I’m with Arseni right now.” It informed him.
“...What?!” Ezekiel said. “Oh, shit. Fuck. Do we need to talk in code?”
“No. Um. Arseni… wants to defect.”
“Defect?” Aethriel seems to have taken the phone. “Defect, like, defect to the side of the demons?”
“Precisely.” Arseni chimed in. “I… I suppose. Um… Aethriel… I… I want to know how you are doing, as well, I heard about your… wing.”
“Um… I am fine… the wing… um… it is… it is better than it ever was in Heaven, I am… doing okay.” It said, “Other than the fact that you kidnapped my friend at gunpoint a day ago, and I have reason to believe you ordered the destruction of my home and almost killed my gracious host...”
“That… was technically on my orders, yes, but I would like to point out that I was very unhappy with the manner in which that order was carried out, not by me, but by an underling who I assure you has been reprimanded.”
“You… you almost killed the being whom I am closest with in the entire universe. His lungs filled with blood. His heart ceased to beat, he was wrenched back from the brink of oblivion by the skilled hands of his people, you took his mobility, you took his LEG!” It began to shout, “YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE! I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU! COME DOWN HERE, NOW! BE A FUCKING ANGEL AND COME DOWN HERE! I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!”
“Aethriel, what is happening?!” Isaiah asked in the background.
“I. I’m sorry. I really am sorry.” Arseni said. “What I did was wrong. So much of what I’ve done is wrong.”
“You expect FORGIVENESS?!” Aethriel shouted into the phone, “NO!!! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!!! I… will NOT…!” It began to cry. “You cannot… just… just switch sides and pretend like everything is OKAY!”
“Who the fuck are you talking to?” Isaiah asked. Ezekiel said something that neither Edon nor Arseni could hear. “Hello?? Edon???”
“Yeah?”
“It’s Isaiah, what the fuck is going on??”
“I am trying to introduce you all to my… um… I guess my former boss… who may I remind you has extensive ties within angelic underground society and also some loose ties to Hell, and wants to defect, and can probably help us in our… quest.” It said. Arseni looked uncomfortable and sad.
“Arseni? Hey man, fuck you.” Isaiah said. “I’m not nearly as pissed off as my Seraph is, but, fuck you, still. You better fucking pay for my medical bills, and my prosthetic.”
“I will do so.” Arseni promised.
“A good one. A NICE one, probably more than one, too, I want options. And a new truck. And all my shit that got incinerated. And physical therapy, and all that good shit.”
“Whatever you want.” Arseni said, “It is the least I can do. I am sorry.”
“...Okay, I like the sound of that.” Isaiah said. “So, what are your plans for defection?”
“Um. Well. I. I was going to leave tomorrow. Tonight I was going to yell at a few angels, burn my bridges and fuck right off straight to Hell.” Arseni said.
“I do not think it should do that.” Edon said. “I think it should stay in heaven and be our insider.”
“I agree with Edon,” Isaiah said, “But, how do we know we can trust you, Arseni?”
“I can make contact with Azazel, I will verify with him that I am trustworthy.” Arseni said, not sure if Azazel would really do that for it after their falling out but nevertheless hopeful.
“That sounds good. Uh. Do not defect yet.”
“Please don't make me stay in Heaven much longer,” Arseni asked, “I truly do want to help you but tonight has really been my breaking point.”
“I mean, how does like… about… I dunno… one to three more years sound?” Isaiah asked. “Maybe one to five.”
“I think I could handle that.” Arseni replied.
“Okay. Well. Um. Reach out to Azazel. Lay low for now, uh, we’ll… can we call you back at this number??”
“I believe so, yes.”
“Okay. Once you speak with Azazel, we'll call you back and discuss details. I'm not about to just tell you my plans over the phone with no verification.” Isaiah said.
“I… I understand. Thank you.” Arseni replied.
“And Edon, please, take the phone for a second..” Edon did so. “Make sure Arseni can't hear this… Stay in Heaven too, to keep an eye on Arseni. Until Azazel gets back to us, or… um… I mean… if in a month we're still unable to contact you, go ahead and assume Arseni isn't trustworthy and come back down to Earth.” Isaiah said.
“I understand….” Edon said. “Um… do you think it's going to take longer than two weeks…?”
“I have no idea how long it's going to take.” Isaiah said. “I'm sorry.”
“Can I talk to Ezekiel???” Edon asked. Isaiah handed the phone to him.
“Hi!”
“Ezekiel you got to talk to Isaiah for me. I cannot stay here for longer than two weeks!!!”
“Oh you poor thing, it must be terrible up there…” Ezekiel said. “I… I'll try. I mean. I also have an in with Azazel, I can try and make it take less long.”
“No, I mean, YES, it sucks here, but… that is not the reason for the specific time limit.” Edon explained.
“...OHHH, I get it now! Okay! Um, yeah, no, I can imagine that rut would be pretty bad in Heaven. Okay. Yeah… let me see what I can do…”
“Thank you,” it said. “I… I am grateful to hear your voice again. I was worried that it would be a very long time…”
“Yeah me too!!! I promise when you come back I'm gonna take you to a restaurant, a fuckin nice one, and introduce you to milkshakes. I think that's gonna blow your mind.” Ezekiel said.
“Is it anything like ice?” Edon asked.

Chapter Text

“Go away.” Arseni grumbled from a very small crack in the door, looking down at Tahir with disgust. It had been avoiding him ever since it read Edon’s case file and seen the terrible things Tahir has said about the Throne, as well as the draconian nature of his “recommendations” for punishment. It had been worse than what Edon had said earlier. Tahir not only recommended destruction by untruing and was the first to push forward felling paperwork, but had also wholly and completely disregarded Edon when it had tried to explain that just because it thought the Seraph was physically attractive didn’t mean it wanted what happened. Tahir had even used the words “asking for it.”

“Oh, please, come on! Let me help you!” He pleaded, “I'm right here, I want to help you feel better!”

“I said GO AWAY! We had a whole talk about this earlier! I am NOT taking you back, you’re a piece of SHIT, and I made a MISTAKE ever fucking you! I don't even know how you got past the guards!!!” Arseni said.

“Can you forgive me? I can make it up to you, just say the word, I’ll do anything you want!” Tahir said. Arseni glared down at him. He looked like he was about to cry, in his nicest outfit (the one he wore to council meetings, the one with gold thread inlaid in the seams) with his hair perfectly combed, just like Arseni had admitted to him one night that it liked. It cringed as it remembered telling him that it enjoyed messing up his hair after he spent so long on it, which had led Tahir to start spending an inordinate amount of time with increasingly elaborate hairstyles. This time he’d showed up with a single braid intricately braided into his scalp, going around the middle and back of his head right below his halo. The rest of his hair was shaped perfectly into a style that framed his face in a very innocent looking way. Arseni couldn’t lie and say it didn’t have the urge to let him in and undo that braid while Tahir was on his knees in front of it, but it pushed that thought from its mind as best it could. FUCK this guy! And NOT in that way!

“I don’t know, it doesn't seem like you're very repentant!” It replied, quoting his concluding argument directly as it slammed the door in his face. It collapsed on one of its many couches, covering its faces with its hands and some pillows. This was turning out to be its worst rut in a good while. Lana and Fria were unavailable, and even if they weren’t, it really wasn’t in the mood to get any of its faces sat on, which was a thought that it really never thought it would have. It was day three of nine. It groaned into the pillows and turned itself over on its chest, then back around to its side to avoid the stimulation inherent with being face down on a piece of sex furniture. What the fuck am I going to do?!

There was more knocking at its door, which it ignored.

It went to its bedroom and covered itself under the blankets, trying to just sleep through the worst of it. This would be so much easier if I was stoned. It thought, sitting up for a moment and rifling through its bedside table. FUCK, it’s all in the other room. The Cherub dragged itself out of bed and back to the common area, where there was STILL knocking on the door. It considered just grabbing the bong off the table and fucking back off to its bedroom, but… maybe telling him to fuck off a second time would get the message through to him.

And uh… it wouldn’t hurt to get one more look at that hairstyle.

“I said LEAVE.” Arseni said, opening the door just a crack one more time.

“You didn’t let me finish last time!” Tahir complained. “I… I understand if you don’t want to see me again… but if that’s the case, then I need my stuff back.” He said. “My clothes. And my notes, too, I have case notes in here. And my nice quill pens.” Arseni narrowed its eyes.

“Where did you leave them? I will get them for you and have a courier bring them to your room.” Arseni said.

“They’re all over the place, you aren’t going to be able to find them all yourself.” Tahir said. “I will just be ten minutes. No longer.” He promised. Arseni sighed.

“...FINE. But if you are not done in ten minutes, I do not care what items you still have here, you will be leaving without them and they will be mine.”

“Thank you.” Tahir said, coming in the door. He could see that Arseni was doing pretty rough, wrapped in its big soft comforter and holding its bong. It sat down on one of the couches and stared at him while he collected his stuff, packing a bowl and hitting it, blowing smoke rings out of its nostrils and bringing the blanket further around itself.

“HEY!” Arseni said, watching Tahir pick up one of its feathers off the floor. “That is not yours.”

“...They make such good pens…” He admitted, carding through the vane of the feather suggestively, or, at least Arseni thought it looked suggestive, but, it wasn’t in a great headspace to judge that right now.

“You’re using my feathers as pens?!?” Arseni asked. “That is… that’s so weird! You have wings, too, why not use your own!?!”

“Yours feel like you,” He said. “Reminded me of um… being held.” He looked down, dropping the feather again. “I will leave it. I’m sorry, that is super weird, now that you say it.”

“I… I mean…” Arseni sighed. “Aren’t you fucking another Cherub by now?? Don’t you have anything better to do?! What about Iraa, he is always down to fuck sluts, even though he prefers Powers. Why do you need it to be ME!?”

“What?! I didn’t say anything about that!!” Tahir countered.

“Oh, don’t play stupid with me! You show up at my place when you know I’m both upset with you AND alone in rut, dressed like THAT!” It chastised. “Besides, what else would you want to ‘help’ me with?!?”

“I just… I thought maybe you’d want some help with it!” Tahir said. “...And Iraa is so unaffectionate, he doesn’t even like to cuddle… I… I miss your wings. I miss sleeping beside you.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you should have thought about that before contributing so much to the mutilation of my Throne!”

“I already told you, I didn’t understand what I was doing!!!!” Tahir said. “I wanted Metabelle to respect me! I wanted the council to see me as educated, not just a stupid, innocent Virtue, I wanted to show I wasn’t to be fucked with! So yes, I threw the book at it, I did, because I was ten years out of Academy and it was my third fucking case I ever tried!” Tahir replied, tears beading at the corners of his eyes. “So yes, I DID fuck up, I never should have said those things, I never should have made those recommendations. I had no idea how consent actually works! They don’t teach you about that in the Academy, and what the Academy teaches was essentially ALL I knew!! And I certainly did not know how much of a sexual deviant I was, or you were, or, like, 25% of angels are, basically! I had no idea! I thought your Throne was an exceptionally weird pervert! And just for the record, it wasn’t even your Throne at the time!”

“If you think Edon is a weird pervert, what does that make ME?!” Arseni questioned.

“It would make you even worse, and myself as well by extension! I know! I remember what you said! And I’m sorry! I… I fucking love you and I don’t want you to leave me!” He cried, dropping the clothing he’d picked up off the floor.

“… Wow.” Arseni said, bowing its heads down, then lifting them again. It took another bong rip with its lion head while it continued, “I… I mean, that takes courage to admit.”

“So this is it?” Tahir said again.

“I don’t know.” Arseni said, softly. “Just… get out of here, before I make another mistake.”

+++

Edon finally resorted to knocking on Arseni’s door. It had no idea where its boss was, and at this point, the shelves were not a viable option of a place to go. No answer. It tried the door handle, and surprisingly, the door swung open. It was empty in here, Arseni was nowhere to be found. Growling in frustration, it locked the door behind it and tried to make itself comfortable in the room.

Wait!!! Didn’t Arseni have a phone? It could just call Ezekiel, he’d know what to do!

Edon went up to the desk and rifled through the drawers, moving papers and ink and pens out of the way until it found what it was looking for: the pink rotary phone. Unfortunately, it had also had no choice but to remove one of two of Arseni’s huge glass bottles of lube from the drawer as well, which now sat on the desk, tantalizingly. Edon ripped its eyes away from it and dialed Ezekiel’s number.

“Hello?”

“Ezekiel!!!” Edon said excitedly, happy that he’d picked up. “Um!! Hi!!! Hello!! I… I um… It’s.. it has been two weeks, and um, I was just wondering… what is the status on Arseni’s clearance?”

“Oh!! Oh yeah, um, Azazel cleared him, they had a long talk and they worked some things out… I was trying to call you, but nobody was picking up!” Ezekiel said.
“Arseni was not in the office.” Edon explained. “So, can I come back to Earth now?”

“Um…” Ezekiel sighed. “I… I want you to. I really want you to. But I was outvoted. The others think it would be better if you stayed a little longer, we’re still trying to figure out a plan, and Arseni and Azazel and the Watchers and all of us are all discussing some plans… Right now, we’re thinking about a propaganda type thing, but nobody can agree on the wording…” Ezekiel said.

“Can I at least come and visit…?” Edon said, heart sinking.

“I want you to. I really, really want you to, and, I… I don’t wanna say it like this, but, fuck, Edon, I miss you, and I miss your knot, and I want you to come back down here so I can wrap you up in a blanket next to the fire and fuck the shit out of you.” He said. Edon had to put the receiver down so that it didn’t crush the thing in its hand by squeezing it too hard. “It’s all I’ve been thinking about lately, I’m not gonna lie. Also, I mean, I wanna just hang out, too! I haven’t forgotten about the milkshake thing, I mean, I’ve been trying out different places and I found this really, really good one. I’m not gonna tell you all the details, but, I promise, when we figure out this fucking plan, I’m gonna take you to this kickass diner, get you whatever you want, take you home, and fuck you silly.”

“...How soon?” It asked, after a very long pause. “B-because, um… I… my… my rut just started yesterday, and um…” It was struggling to string a sentence together.
“OH shit. I… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be teasing you like that!!! If I’d known I wouldn’t have fuckin’ started out with that right off the bat, I’m so sorry.” Ezekiel apologised. “We should talk about something else. Uh, what’s Heaven like? How’s the booze market?”

“No, please… I likely would have been very aroused just hearing your voice no matter what you talked about…” Edon admitted, giving in and popping the top off the bottle of lube on the Cherub’s desk. “Um… Ezekiel…”

“Yeah?”

“C-could you please keep talking…?” It said. It tried to pour just a little bit of lube out of the bottle but ended up spilling kind of a lot of it into its hand. The sight of the fluids dripping down was also not helping its situation. Its cock folded outwards, and it couldn’t resist the urge to wrap its astral hand around itself.

“What do you want me to talk about?” Ezekiel asked, starting to understand where this was going, even though he felt pretty guilty for starting it and riling up the poor Throne.

“W-what are you wearing?” It said, nervously. Ezekiel stifled a laugh.

“Not much. I got these panties on that say ‘FAITH’ on the ass, I found them at a thrift store last week and thought they were funny, plus Baraqiel keeps fucking ripping my damn underwear to shreds, so I needed new ones.” He said. “Oh, also I’m wearing that hoodie you like.”

“...How many times have you had sex with him?” Edon asked.

“What, you jealous?”

“A-a little, yeah!” Edon replied.

“Edon, don’t worry. It’s very transactional. He’s paying me SO much fucking money, it’s insane. You get pussy for free and between you and me, you’re way better in bed than him.” He reminded it. It wanted to say that it really didn’t care if it was transactional or not, it was just jealous that Baraqiel had what it didn’t right immediately now. “Speaking of which, I’m SO fucking wet for you right now.”

“... Go on,” it said, breathlessly.

“Yeah, there’s this little wet spot right where my pussy is. I’m just gonna pull the fabric to the side, real slowly… oh, there we go, now my pussy’s out.” He said. “If you were here you could so easily push my thighs further apart and get a taste.”

“Fuck. Um… d-do you, would you, um… would you like it, um, filled…?” Edon asked, unsure of how this was supposed to work.

“Yes, Edon, fuck, I want you to fill me up, I’m so sad we’re apart. I wish you were here right now, instead I just gotta be here all alone and touch myself.” He complained dramatically, softly punctuating the end of that sentence with a soft, slutty moan.

“I want to fuck you so bad,” It replied, “Oh please, please keep going…”

“Are you jerking off right now?”

“...Yes…” It admitted, trying to slow down its motions to no avail.

“Good… I want you to keep doing that, okay? Remember to be gentle with yourself. Remember what we figured out, what I showed you, try playing with the ridges, use your thumb…” It followed his instructions as best it could. “There you go. Softly. Close your eyes, pretend that’s MY hand.” Edon did so.

“I… yes… I’m doing that.” Edon said. Ezekiel found it very amusing how Edon didn’t really understand that phone sex is a two way street, but, he also found it very endearing.

“Trace the ridges now, up and down, how does that feel?” He offered.

“G-goood,” Edon whined, doing its best. “It would feel so much better if you were doing it, I am no good at this,”

“No, shhh… you can do this. I’m right here with you, remember? I’m here.” He assured it.

“W-what are you doing to yourself?” Edon asked, “I-I , um, you told me you were… r-really wet…”

“Oh, Edon, I’m soaked. Right now I’m just touching the outside of my pussy, I’m laying down in that blanket pile in the loft, my fingers are all slippery and wet…”

“Fuck…”

“I don’t even think you’d need any lube. You could probably just slide right in… I’m pulling up my hoodie now, if you were here you could see my hips and my waist, but it’s still just right underneath my tits so you can’t see those.”

“Ezekiel,, please…” Edon begged, “Please can I come down there, please, you can’t do this to me,”

“Do you want to stop?” Ezekiel asked. Edon paused.

“Um… no…” It said. “I… fuck, I just want to be inside you so bad, if I even manage to cum like this I’m going to knot absolutely nothing, and I just, I, I just want to be in you so badly, please, twenty minutes, in and out, nobody will even notice I was gone!” Edon pleaded.

“I know angel cake but everyone is going to be so mad at me if I tell you yes and then it fucks up our whole plan!” Ezekiel said, also sounding frustrated. That kind of made it worse. Edon would have even preferred it if he was doing this teasingly on purpose. Knowing he was actually probably gonna be diabolically horny when it returned only made it want to be back home sooner.

“...I… mmm…” It grumbled.

“It would be so cool if I could send you pictures. It sucks Arseni has a rotary phone for some reason, all the demons have cell phones. I’ve been sending so many nudes to the Watcher Orgy Group Chat. But if you had a phone I’d be sending them to you for approval first to be honest, I know you’d tell me straight if one of them was bad.” He joked.

“Well then keep describing things to me!” It pleaded, fighting to keep its movements gentle.

“You’re so cute when you beg.” Edon said, “Okay. So, I figured out my dick piercing feels REALLY good with a vibrator. Baraqiel gave me this crazy vibrator from Hell, it’s got like 50 settings and I have to charge it by leaving it out during thunderstorms, which is honestly really inconvenient-”

“Ezekiel!!!” Edon said, “Come on!!!”

“Oh, right, right! Um, yeah, I took a really good video of me cumming from fucking with my piercing, it took like two hours of a lot of gentle touching and by the time I actually came, my pussy was actually dripping onto the floor, I was so turned on. I sent it to Azazel and he told me to try it with a vibrator and WOW, that was an experience, especially after cumming for the first time right after two hours of what amounted to basically just edging? Yeah. That was wild.”

“Was this recently?” Edon asked.

“This was yesterday.” Ezekiel said. Edon remembered its rut starting to get bad yesterday. It pictured Ezekiel on Earth, probably face down ass up with his cunt wet and available... literally dripping to the floor... so wet for it... it wanted its mouths between his legs so bad... it wanted to knot him so terribly... but instead, it had to sit around in heaven dealing the last of Arseni’s wine to an increasingly desperate client base, as the Seraphim had heeded its warning. There had been absolutely zero alcohol coming in from the lower heavens Seraph suppliers, and Raphael’s angels were struggling to bring back much either, not exactly sure if they were going to face punishment as well. Edon suspected that the Seraphim were probably telling each other “Do not do any more pickups on Earth because of Raphael” and telling Raphael’s angels “Do not do any more pickups on Earth because of Uriel” in order to preserve their market. The rumor mill was running.

“FFffuck, I wish I could have been there inside you while you did that, fuck, imagine… imagine doing that, but you and I were tied,” It said. "I-I can just imagine,,, how fucking warm, how wet, oohhh, I can picture you squeezing around me while you cum..." Ezekiel put his hand up to his mouth for a second. "We... we'd make such a mess..."

“Yeah? You wanna knot me, hmm? You want to tie and get stuck like that for hours? You wanna play with my jewelry while we wait, you wanna feel me cum again and again around you?”

“YES.” Edon answered, relaxing against the back of the desk, no longer able to focus on its worry about being discovered. “I want to tie and play with your piercing and make you squirm and move your muscles and writhe under me while I cum inside you, fuck, please,”

“It’s so fucking hot how serious you are,” Ezekiel said, “You’re not even saying that just to be sexy you’re like, this is a real ask. Bold. I like it.”

“What? Why wouldn’t it be a real ask???” It said, losing the battle quickly. It started to get close and abandoned its technique, opting instead to just jerk off furiously.

“Phone sex usually includes some amount of impossible fantasies.” Ezekiel explained. “But I mean. We can definitely do that as soon as you get here. I mean, I already told you I’m taking you to get milkshakes first. But right after that? We can go right home. I’ll take you right home and you can pick me up and put me however you want, I’ll help you get my clothes off so it takes less time, and you can knot me as many times as you want, until you’re totally spent.” He said. Edon was really close now.

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

“Can we kiss after?” It asked.

“We can kiss during!” Ezekiel upped the ante. “Yeah, cute little thing, we can kiss while you breed me! You haven’t really wanted to kiss me before, what’s gotten into you?”

“I…I saw two Seraphim making out…” It confessed, “...was pretty hot,”

“Yeah, I’d love to kiss. I can choke you with my tongue while you try your hardest to put a baby in me.”

That sent it over the edge. It slid its hand down in an attempt to knot SOMETHING instead of just the empty air, and it ended up popping its knot into its own fist. It came all over the interior side of the woodwork on this fancy ass desk. It immediately realized that this was going to be a bitch to clean up, and that it was going to have to clean it up because this was still technically its bosses’ desk. Nevertheless, that didn’t stop it from continuing to cum, a good twenty or so pulses before the lack of pressure from an orifice around its dick got to it and its body stopped allowing it to continue. It collapsed exhausted into a flat ring on the floor, holding the receiver up to its mouth with a free hand.

“Fuckkkk….” It groaned, watching as the lights in the office flickered just a bit.

“Did you just cum?” Ezekiel asked.

“Yeah…” It said, “It kind of got everywhere…”

“Aw, poor thing. Guess you’ll have to clean up now, what did I say about tissues?” Ezekiel lighty jabbed.

“I didn’t have tissues, all I had was this stupid orange lube Arseni has in its desk…” It complained. “Ezekielllll… pleaassee ask the others if I can just come visit!!!” It said.

“I will, I promise.” He said. “I’ll call you back ok? I wanna check in on you, so pick up the phone!”

+++

“Unlock the door!” Arseni shouted, pounding on the office door a few hours later.

“Yes, yeah, I am coming…” It said, opening the door. It had a half empty wine bottle in its hand and hovered there looking tired and frustrated. “Well?? Get on with it!” It said, ushering the Cherub inside.

“You’re acting like this is your office now?” Arseni said.

“Well it was this, or jerking off in the public Ophanim Shelves downstairs. So I chose to not get myself killed, thank you.” It retorted. “There aren’t enough fucking BOTTOMS around here!!!”

“Oh, great, you’re in rut, too?” Arseni asked. “Well, tough luck, because I am not a bottom. I don’t bottom for ANYONE, the MOST I’ll do is suck dick and even then you better be willing to beg or I’m not even into it.” It declared, turning its heads. “AH!! You used my GOOD LUBE?!?”

“...Fuck you,” Edon said, “that could have been anyone’s lube.”

“NO, Edon, that stuff is expensive!! And plus it’s got saffron in it!” It said, examining the bottle. “FUCK how much did you use?!”

“Whatever!!! I don’t care that you’re technically my superior anymore!” Edon said, angrily, “As far as I am concerned, we are on equal footing, and you owe me for being such an asshole!”

“You don’t understand. I don’t usually use this stuff unless I’m alone in rut, it helps make it easier to self pleasure to completion, but, on lower angels it’s almost like a heat accelerant. I don’t know how it works on Ophanim, but you better pray it doesn’t work like it does on Virtues, you’d be fucked!”

“...Oh.”

“Please tell me you didn’t put all of that on your-”

“I put all of it on my dick, yes.” It said. “There is also some on the floor.” Arseni sighed.

“Do you feel weird at all?”

“...Define weird,” It said, “I feel sexually frustrated but… I already felt like that.”

“Good. Well, I only came here for this bottle, so… bye.” It said, picking up the bottle that Edon had used.

“Hey!! Leave some here for me!” It argued, following close behind Arseni. “Where are you even going?!”

“To my rooms. I’m gonna try and invite some friends over and uh. Fix this problem.” It said. “But on the off chance no one shows, I… well. I wanted a backup.” It said.

“Can I come?!” Edon asked, sounding frustrated and upset.

“...Are you going to share and play nice?” It asked. “If I say hands off, you have to be willing to abide by that.”

“I’ll do whatever.” Edon said. Arseni looked it over and sighed. If nobody shows up… it would be nice to at least do a circlejerk…

“Fine. Come with me.”

Edon had only been inside the Cherub’s rooms once before, to pick up some paperwork it had accidentally left there. It was a bit surprised to see what the place looked like when Arseni hadn’t made it presentable. There was another pink rotary phone on the table, along with its bong and several fairly outdated porn magazines, stacked up on the table, with a few open to random pages, mostly of twinks. Arseni had drawn little halos and wings on some of them with a gold permanent marker. The furniture was rearranged into a sort of nest, with blankets and pillows all piled up in the center. It looked like a spot that Arseni was just dying to get another angel into, under those warm covers so it could fuck them properly.

“Make yourself at home, I suppose. I am going to start making phone calls.”

“You do that…” Edon said, maneuvering its way over to a blanket on the floor and artfully snatching two magazines that caught its eyes off the table. One of them was mostly human women, but featured a lot of fun shaped dildos and ‘alien abduction’ stuff. The other one was a good mix of human men and human women, and there were lots of scenes with more than three humans all at once. Arseni sat down on the edge of one of the couches and started dialing.

“Hey, Iraa! Yeah, I’m having a party, come on, bring your newest fling, bring that Virtue from the Diligence grad program, it’ll be a great time! Who’s coming? Uh… um… well, you’re the first guy I called, but, uh, my Throne is here… Wait, don’t hang up! Hang on!! There’s gonna be weed, and more angels, okay? You’re just the first guy I-” Arseni sighed. “Whatever, fuck Iraa. I got plenty of contacts…” It said. Edon looked at it skeptically with a few eyes while it poured over the magazines.

“I do not think Iraa is coming.” Edon said.

“Yeah, no shit!” Arseni replied. “Ugh…” It dialed another number. “Jaasiel, hi! Yeah, it’s Arseni. Look, I’m having a party. Yeah right now! It’s going to be WILD.” It said. “You just gotta bring- no, don’t just… NO! I don’t deal coke anymore! NO, it’s going to make- Fuck, okay, I KNEW I shouldn’t have unblocked you! Goodbye!!” It shoved the phone back in the receiver, and then picked it up again, dialing a separate number. “Hey, it’s Arseni… yeah, I’m having a party…”
This went on for like thirty minutes. At one point there was a slim possibility that some Dominion whose name started with a Y was going to come over and bring her six friends, but she canceled five minutes later because apparently, Iraa was throwing a party, and it was Lower Angels Only, no entry PERIOD if you were from a choir higher than Dominion, no matter WHAT the ratio was. Arseni gave up after that.

“Looks like no one is coming.” Edon said, matter of factly. “Would you prefer to stay in this room or your bedchambers? I will leave you alone to… do your thing… I just want a private space as well,” It said, trying to fill the awkward silence.

“No. Stay here.” It said. “I mean, if you’re cool with that. If you’d prefer privacy, my room is yours.”

“There is weed and porn out here,” Edon said, “I will stay here. Speaking of which. Let me have some.” It said. Arseni looked at it skeptically.

“You sure? This is some pretty strong stuff,” Arseni said. “You really shouldn't smoke this if you've never smoked weed before.”

“I am certain… I have absolutely smoked weed before.” It said. Arseni packed a bowl for the Throne and handed the bong over to it. It watched as the other angel artfully maneuvered the bong to be able to hit it, and was fairly impressed considering its significantly different mouth anatomy. It hadn't been lying, Arseni supposed. Edon closed its eyes and handed the bong back.

“Impressive.” It said. “How… how'd you even learn to do that? It does not seem easy with your wheels the way they are.”

“Aethriel taught me how to do it,” It said, feeling a little lightheaded now. It watched as Arseni took the next rip, inhaling through one mouth and exhaling through another. “I prefer joints though.”

“That… does make sense.” Edon reached for the bong again. “Hey, wait a second. Seriously. Wait a good ten minutes and see how you feel, you don't want to do too much of this shit.” Arseni cautioned. “You WILL start hallucinating and getting visions. Trust me, you do NOT want to find out who God's God is.”

“I am not a child, I can handle a little weed!” Edon argued.

“I am not saying you're a child, I'm saying that I know you and I feel that you have the tendency to take things a bit too far.”

“...And YOU don't?!” Edon retorted, snatching the bong out of its hands.

“Suit yourself. You are going to be absolutely blasted.” It said. Edon hesitated after that and put the bong back down on the center table, a little concerned about the ominous warning. “Good boy,” Arseni praised without thinking, judgement a little off for multiple reasons right now. Edon stared at the Cherub, very confused about how that statement made it feel. “Sorry.” Arseni looked away.

“No, no no, don't apologize,” Edon said. “It's… fine.” They stared at each other for a second before Arseni looked away again, unable to maintain eye contact. It… it wasn't into Ophanim. Right? There was no way.

“So, um… how was your time on Earth?” Arseni asked, trying to make conversation, finding the circumstances too awkward to masturbate in even though that had been the whole idea.

“It… it was nice. It was the best time of my life, I think, even though so many scary new things happened.” Edon explained. “I feel as though there I can be. Me. I can have an identity, it is as if I… matter. This is not a way I have felt before, the closest I had before that was your kindness towards me, but, you are kind of an asshole.” It said.

“Hey, I tried to open up to you, but you were so closed off! I kept trying to subtly hint things, I even invited you to my parties a few times and you didn't come, not even once!”

“I thought that was you trying to get me to do extra work!” Edon said. “I didn't think that was an invitation to PARTICIPATE, I thought you were asking me to like, deliver drinks!”

“You really think that lowly of me?? Edon…” Arseni sighed. “Let's… let's talk about something else. How did you find Isaiah? Truly that still baffles me, as the other angels I sent couldn't find him at all.”

“It was very easy. I went to the general area you told me to go and flew around for a few hours looking in people's windows until I found Isaiah's place. And he was just in there, fucking a Seraph. So it was pretty easy I would say. The reason it was easy for me is because I was still marked for destruction in heaven or something, which, I guess makes me a… pre-demon demon, and, so, the angelic warding spell on the house didn't work on me.”

“Wait, so, it's the human and the other angel who are having sex, not you and the human OR you and the angel?” Arseni asked. “Why… what… what about that situation benefits you? Or is it a three-way situation?”

“I mean. We had a three way that night.” It confessed. “But a day later we went to this club, and I met another human, Ezekiel. We… um… we got along pretty well… and we had… a lot of… uh…” It still felt weird to be talking about this, and besides, thinking about this was turning it on. “We've been having a LOT of sex. When I was on Earth we were having sex almost every day if not more often.”

“You had a three-way THAT NIGHT?!”

“Yes.” Edon confirmed.

“So they were having sex, and then you showed up, fire and brimstone, probably yelling at them and calling them sinners, and then they invited you to have a three-way?”

“I already said yes.” Edon reiterated. “I don't understand it either.”

“What did you do specifically??” Arseni asked, settling into its chair. Edon was very aware that at this point Arseni was hard, the garments it wore covered little as it had shifted them to get more comfortable, and the Throne could see a good outline of its shaft. It hesitated. On one hand… this is Arseni, what was it thinking, considering fucking this asshole?! On the other hand…

“Um… well… we kissed. And Aethriel fucking… depth tested my throats with its fingers and tongues… while Isaiah made me eat him out and he was also giving me um. A handjob…” It recounted. “And then-”

“AND THEN?!” Arseni was shocked, “There was more?”

“Will you just let me tell the story?!” Edon said, frustratedly. It explained the rest of the encounter in a good amount of detail, getting a bit lost in it as it gradually became more and more aroused. Arseni was hanging on its every word, and it felt very embarrassed but also didn't really care. The Cherub had ASKED, what did it expect?

“So this was a seriously kinky threesome,” Arseni commented. “I mean… did you like it? Getting bitten and mercilessly teased?”

“Y-yeah!” Edon said, kind of shifting its eyes away from the other being. “I really like getting bitten. I am not happy that Ezekiel cannot really bite me, he is a decent lay but he does not have teeth that can pierce steel, like a Seraph.” It deliberately ignored the comment about being mercilessly teased in hopes that the Cherub would be nice to it.

“Well, he is a human. You can't compare him to a divine being like that, I don't even know if MY teeth could break your wheels.” Arseni commented. “I do have a lot of very sharp teeth, but, I cannot say I've ever tried to bite a Throne. I wonder what it would taste like.” It said. “Ooh, and I have three sets of different teeth plus a beak, too! You'd have options.”

“I-I think at least ONE of those sets could probably… um… b-break my surface… you would never know if you did not try.” Edon said. 

“You'd like that, wouldn't you?” 

They both looked at each other again. 

“...I would not dislike it.” 

“Are you asking me to bite you?”

“... not… not NECESSARILY…” It said, slowly. 

“Edon?” 

“Yes?”

“You're hard right now.” Arseni commented. Edon’s dick was partially everted, the being was unable to keep it inside the divine flame anymore.

“S-so are you!” Edon argued, trying to put it back in. 

“Well, I am looking at a very pretty angel right now. Can you blame me?” The Cherub had decided that yes, it did find Edon at least passably attractive. Besides, its curiosity about the Throne's body was a factor here too. It had never fucked a Throne before, and had heard that doing so was quite the trip. It had seen pornography of it, obviously, and seen it happen from a distance, but it wanted a more hands on experience. Edon looked at it with its general expression being like, “really? Don't you fucking mock me!” “No, really! Besides, part of me very much wants to know what you sound like when you beg.” 

“...You will think it is pathetic.” Edon informed it.

“I am not hearing any downsides.” Arseni offered. Edon looked skeptical and unsure. “Look, it is only an offer. We do not have to do anything at all. I was just thinking, you know. We are both here. We are both horny. Why not have fun?”

“Because, Arseni,” Edon said, no longer calling it Your Grace, “I do not like the very real possibility of being mocked by an angel who is objectively better and more attractive than me and could easily and at any time decide I am completely worthless and begin to degrade me and throw me aside like a broken toy. When I have sex with humans at least I know that they are lower beings and nothing they think or say really matters.” 

“I am not going to mock you. I just think it could be fun to get off together.” Edon looked away for a second. “So… what do you say?” 

“...Go ahead and bite me.” It said, frustratedly. “You might as well. I… I am willing to risk my dignity for this, however much of that I still have left. Besides… I … it would be a lie if I told you I have never thought about fucking you.”

“That doesn't sound like begging to me.” 

“FUCK you!!!” Edon said, taking the bong off the table and taking another hit from it, deciding that it had been long enough. Its mind felt fuzzy, but, that was the desired effect here. It felt that it would be easier to allow itself to beg if its inhibitions were a little lowered.

“Come here, get in my lap.” Arseni requested, spreading its thighs apart. 

“...Fine. Okay.” Edon flew up to the couch and got in Arseni’s lap. The Cherub leaned back, making space for it and relaxing into a comfortable position like this. Arseni was a good deal taller than Edon, so, it worked out. Its two hands together would almost be able to close around one of the Throne's wheels. Edon found it very easy to relax into the larger angel. Something about it promoted a feeling of calm. Or maybe it was the weed. Either way it felt warm, and held, and almost safe. 

“There you go. So obedient, so eager.” Arseni commented. “You just got right up here as soon as I asked.”

“What else was I supposed to do?!” It said, rebuffing the praise. Arseni giggled at it and instead began to touch the smaller angel, running its hands over the inside of Edon’s wheels in an arc. It gasped, shuddering at the touch. When Isaiah had done it, it was gentle, barely there touches of his fingertips, not using his entire hand sliding them EVERYWHERE like the Cherub was. As it adjusted to being touched again, Arseni leaned down to give it a small kiss on the top of its wheel.

“Feels good?”

“Y-yes,” It replied. “Fuck, your hands cover so much…”

“I am quite a bit bigger than you, aren't I?” The angel mused. “Now I must warn you, I have never had intercourse with a Throne before, but, I've seen many Ophanim have sex, so, I know how it works.”

“I am glad one of us does,” Edon said, “I have been making it up this whole time.”

“Be aware that I am no expert, I have the… knowledge, but not the experience. I never really considered doing this before. But you seem like a really fun toy to play with.”

“I… would like that. To be played with, I think.” Edon said. It slow blinked its eyes as the Cherub felt it up, shivering as it ghosted past sensitive areas it did not have the brain power to map out or remember right now. “I… would…. Um. I would like to explore being a… a toy.”

“How do you feel about being penetrated?” The Cherub asked, rubbing circles into the curve in the underside of the Throne’s inner wheel. 

“I… I do not know if that is possible for you to do,” Edon said. 

“Yeah, of course it is. I'll make it fit, I always do. Can I prepare you?” It moved a hand to the base of the Throne’s dick, a good few inches past the divine flame of its center. Arseni parted the divine flame to reveal more of Edon’s anatomy so that it could do this more effectively. If you REALLY looked, you could tell there was a bit of a gap between three trilateral trapdoor looking structures there. The top one was already open, resting atop the Throne’s dick, but the bottom two were still shut, creating a slit between them. It kind of looked like a pussy, like labia, just with those three complex folding cartilaginous structures instead of just two, and they were a soft, pale green color instead of the color of flesh. A bit of clear slick was smeared across the outside of it. Edon was wet. 

“...I guess so.” It said, equal parts nervous, aroused, and confused. It couldn't really see what Arseni was doing from this angle. 

Arseni petted gently over Edon’s closed labia, attempting to tease its folds gently open. While it did feel kinda good, Edon flinched; that weird RUBBING feeling brought up some bad memories.

“Hey!!! Hey, stop that!” It said, pulling away from the other angel. Arseni removed its hand from where it was. 

“I'm sorry.” Arseni said. “Would you like to do something else? I've been told Ophanim give good blowjobs and I'm more than willing to accept that.”

“...No, I… I just…” It struggled to find words. “...I need a moment…” It had felt pretty good. It just had to remind itself that this situation was different. And Arseni was clearly willing to respect boundaries, it had stopped when Edon asked. “I-I don't want you to touch the outside like that…” 

“You don't like the rubbing?” Arseni asked. Edon blinked in agreement. “I can do it a different way. I can just pop them open, if that's what you'd prefer. Although I do feel I have the duty to inform you that doing so is… generally considered to be a dick move by an impatient top. One who can't be fucked to wait the three minutes it would take to just… gently tease you open, let you bloom in due season...” Edon had no fucking idea in the world what ‘bloom in due season’ meant in this context, and Arseni seemed to think that it knew what it was talking about. So out of desire to seem more informed than it was, cooler, maybe, Edon didn’t ask. 

“That… sounds better.” It said. Arseni reached back down and slid its fingers softly over the cleft between the two closed labia. It messed around down there for a second and slid a finger underneath one of them, in order to get in a position where it could gently spread the folds open. The labia folded out and ‘clicked’ into their open position, flashing their inner chrome/ silvery color patches in the light. GOD, Edon was wet! Arseni rubbed with its thumb over the little iridescent chrome patches decorating the inner parts of its labia gently, and watched in amusement as they wiggled a bit, ‘clicking’ in and out of position just a little at the pleasurable stimulation. It seemed like they were designed to be a protective covering, and all this pleasurable stimulation had caused them to become more receptive to popping into place, in this open position, like a mating signal of some kind. Edon didn't know this, but, that was called ‘blooming’, and it would have happened all on its own if it had been alright with Arseni teasing it on the outside of its labia for a little while longer. “Oh..!” Edon had never felt anything like this before. 

“Such pretty petals…” Arseni teased. “I've never seen them silver-chrome before up close…”

 This new open, pussy out position revealed a very slight crescent shaped opening directly below the opening of its sheath (in which its phallus emerged from and resided in,) like a gap between where its shaft emerged and the contiguous (and impossible to see) form of the components extant within its flame. Looking at this was akin to trying to finger someone’s pussy while on four tabs of acid; it was not a very self explanatory genital situation. No Throne’s genital situation was; they all kind of looked like an acid trip externally. If Edon was born female, the only difference on the outside would be that it would have a significantly smaller phallus, which it wouldn’t be able to ejaculate out of, and a much smaller sheath to match, which would be more attached to the petals and cloaca. Edon was, however, not born male either, and its sheath was semi-attached to the petals, just less so than it would be if it had been born female. If it had been born male, its sheath and its petals would be totally separate. That being said, all this was VERY difficult to discern externally. Pretty much all Throne genitalia looks identical on the outside without a very discerning eye, and even then it can be difficult to tell.

“U-um!!! I guess so??” It said. Arseni giggled as it continued to stimulate its partner there, on what it had called its ‘petals’, building up a strange but very pleasant sensation until Edon couldn't take it anymore. It felt like it was about to piss itself, which was weird because it hadn't felt like it needed to at all before Arseni started touching it like this!!! “W-wait wait wait!!! Stop!” It said. Arseni stopped, looking down at it a bit confused. “I-I… I don't want to… make... that... happen..?” It explained, not sure what was happening to its body and DEFINITELY not wanting to tell Arseni ‘If you keep doing that I'm going to piss on you.’ The feeling died down really quick as soon as Arseni stopped touching it, and Arseni’s expression changed entirely as soon as Edon said that.

“Ohh… I see how it is.” Arseni teased. “You're KINKY kinky… I wouldn't expect you to want me to do that to you while you're in rut. But I can work with that, oh, I can WORK with that...” Edon, again, had no idea what the fuck Arseni was talking about. It wasn't really clocking right now that it had almost had an orgasm, and Arseni just edged it, just now. Edging an angel in rut was considered to be fairly kinky play... It just hadn’t ever had the opportunity to cum like that and had no idea that, kind of like a prostate orgasm, feeling like you’re gonna piss yourself is part of the experience, with petal play, considering their anatomical position. “Alright. Here. I'm going to get you ready to take me, now.”

Arseni stopped touching the inner parts of its labia and moved down lower, putting gentle pressure on the entrance to its cloaca, which was that gap situated below its sheath. After it got Edon accustomed to that feeling and began to relax against Arseni’s chest, it dipped two fingers inside of the Throne.

It felt… really weird, to be penetrated like this. Kind of nice, but, so weird that Edon was unsure Arseni was doing this right. The Cherub frowned when it realized Edon did not really like the way this felt, and then attempted to focus some attention on the front surface of the canal by rotating its wrist and curling its fingers up and in, just behind the first one of its internal cartilaginous ridges, which, don’t worry, I’ll get to in a second.

 This stimulated the gland that produced all that lubricant in its pussy almost directly, which caused it to drip in a little rush onto the Cherub’s thigh. It softly swore under its breath as Arseni did this, flexing its wings, almost feeling like it would fall from its resting place in the larger angel’s lap. Oh. That felt REALLY good. 

“There we are… there's that gorgeous g-spot… That looks like it feels good… wow… I will really focus there when I penetrate you.” It commented, as it finger fucked its subordinate. It felt very wet and warm inside, albeit containing sections of cartilaginous ridges along with the softness of a hole that can be fucked. The ridges were positioned as such: the first one was a little ways in, beginning a bit before Arseni’s second knuckle. The second was a little further back than that, just out of reach of Arseni’s fingers…They were oriented in such a way that a knot would really get caught between them and tie tight . Its g-spot was just behind the first ridge, right where a knot would begin to tie if it were being penetrated by another Throne. Arseni could work with this. “And here I thought it would be difficult to finger a Throne… Fuck, are they treating you right, on Earth? Your pussy seems pretty neglected… you’re taking my fingers so nicely, but… seems like it’s been a long while… you're reacting like you've forgotten what this feels like."

“Ffuck,” Edon moaned, “Um… I… wow… this… is just… very different from what I have experienced before.” 

“Do you like it?”

“I very much like it… I just. I. I am not sure if I can take… all of you.” It said, glancing down at Arseni’s erection. It was throbbing against its wheels, separated only by very thin clothing as Arseni toyed with it like this; it was clearly enjoying itself, making a mess of the lower angel in its lap. “I don't want to, it is… very big. And I do not want you to catch me on those barbs.”

“You don’t have to.” Arseni said. “I especially do not expect a non-Cherub to take barbs. Those could hurt, and you do not have plates inside you that would protect you. And if you ask me, they do not feel amazing against the plates, either… some Cherubim like it, but… I don’t know. I think they are masochists.”

“...That is appreciated information.” Edon commented, eyeing the barbs. Arseni resumed its movements, curling its fingers up into its g-spot and wringing muffled moans out of the Throne as it did so, only increasing the gentle drip of slick from its cloaca. Arseni experimented with this, testing the angel’s reaction to firmer and softer pressure, rocking versus thrusting, up and down the spot versus circling over it. It was unable to get much of anything conclusive, as Edon just seemed to get louder and say “please” less comprehensibly with each passing minute. It came to the conclusion that it was not picky, which was perfect because Arseni had never done this before and had been hoping it would be able to make a subby angel cum from penetration today. 

“Okay, that is enough playing around,” Arseni said, pulling its fingers out of its now very frustrated partner, paying special attention to the way the Throne seemed to collapse against it, like that stimulation was the only thing holding it up. It whined and shifted in the Cherub’s lap, wanting more. “Now I will bite you. Where do you want to be bitten?”

“A-anywhere, really, just. Not near the missing eye.” It said. Arseni giggled at it.

“You aren’t going to beg?” It asked. “I don’t know if I can do it unless you beg me pretty enough.” Edon wanted to hide itself.

“...please,” It began again, in a very small voice. It was really trying. “Please will you… bite me.”

“That’s a start,” Arseni entirely pulled its clothing to the side, letting its dick rest against the base of Edon’s with no barrier in the way, gently and slowly rubbing itself over the hidden entrance that was present just underneath it. It wasn't bringing much relief to the Throne's frustration, but, stimulation to that area definitely wasn't nothing, and helped Edon relax more readily into its sex partner’s embrace. It really liked Arseni grinding over its petals and its dick like that; Arseni was big enough that it was stimulating all those sensitive external structures. “I cannot help but think maybe having some motivation may help…?”

“Like… what?” Edon asked. 

“Like, if I were to get closer and closer to giving you what you want the more you beg.” It clarified. 

“I don’t even know what I want,” It said, feeling very cozy right now. It really liked the way frotting with this Cherub felt; feeling their dicks slide against each other was at least on par with jerking off.  Edon enjoyed the sensation and tried to reach out with one of its nearby tongues to taste the other angel, which startled Arseni at first. “I, I just want to feel good, and sated, and sore. I want you to be so mean to me and so nice to me. I want you to treat me gently but roughly. I am very conflicted.” It said.

“How about this time around, since it is our first time, I treat you very gently?” Arseni offered, softly bringing one of Edon’s wings up to its lion mouth.

“Y-you can be a little harsher than that…?” Edon suggested, folding its wheels out of the way in hopes of increasing access to its wing, to no avail. Arseni just held it there, not biting down, just holding it there. “Come on, please!!! Please, I-I probably taste nice… if you break the surface, my manna is like copper and honey…” Teeth dug a little harder into the flesh of its wing, and it yelped in pain. Arseni slowly, carefully slotted the head of its cock into the (unbeknownst to it) virgin slit of the Throne’s entrance, just barely pushing through the slight resistance to pop itself in past the outer ring of muscle. Edon made a strangled moaning sound which devolved quickly into louder yelling as Arseni bit down harder, actually breaking skin this time as Edon had requested. It really enjoyed how tight the Throne got when it bit down with just a BIT too much force. “Yes, please, do it again!”

“Are you able to take that?” The Cherub questioned, referring to the penetration depth. 

“YES, please, yes,” Edon babbled, “I can take a little more…!” Arseni did not hesitate to press another few inches into the Throne, deliberately pressing up and out to stimulate where it had been teasing the poor angel before with its fingers, between the two sets of ridges. “”FUCK-”

“Right there?” Arseni teased, thrusting up into Edon at that consistent angle. It was hitting its newly discovered g-spot head on, but FAR too slowly for the very impatient lower angel.

“God, please, ohhh-! Come on, y-you are already I-IN me, please, dent my wheels, go faster, go harder!” It pleaded with the Cherub now. 

“Hmm… I don’t know… I like this pace.” It said, releasing its jaws around the angel’s wing, the opposite of what Edon wanted.

“Fff,,, it… is… practically only teasing to go that slowly!” It retorted to the best of its ability, trying to hold itself together. 

“Shh, always so impatient…”

“Please!!!” It sounded like it was gonna cry. Arseni was starting to realize that Edon was not very good with words, and this may be the height of the angel's ability to beg. Arseni relented, picking up the pace. Edon sighed a soft word that kind of sounded like “FINALLY” and summoned an astral hand to touch itself while the Cherub finally fucked it properly. Upon noticing, Arseni stopped thrusting entirely and focused its attention on prying Edon’s fingers off itself.

“No, we don't do that.” Arseni chastised.

“W-what?? I'm just touching myself!” Edon complained, frustrated at the ceasing of stimulation.

“You don't get to touch yourself while I'm fucking you unless I tell you to. If you don't think what I'm doing is enough, if you think you'd do a better job, you can jerk off over there on the floor.” It pointed to the blanket on the floor. 

“But-!”

“Do you want me to keep doing this?” It grabbed Edon by the inner wheel and pressed it down on its cock, touching whatever magic little button it had in there and almost causing it to shed a few tears from how nice that felt.

“Yes, but-”

“Then you will do what I tell you. Hands off,” It instructed. 

“...fine…”

“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Arseni questioned, deviously.

“I said FINE!” Edon retorted, very frustrated. It was not even sure if it could finish without stimulation on its dick, and it was starting to think that Arseni may not give much of a damn if Edon got to cum or not. It was incorrect, but, that was what it assumed.

“That is not how you talk to your superiors.” Arseni again chastised. 

“...If you think, honestly, that I will call you Your Grace during sex, you are WRONG.” It replied, trying to regain control and fuck itself on the Cherub instead of Arseni doing the work as it had been before. Arseni physically held it still, with both of its hands at ten and two on its inner wheel, and four rapidly summoned astral ones at the top and bottom bilaterally of its outer one. It slid itself further into the Throne until it bumped against a tri laterally oriented valve like structure, kind of like a really weird cervix. It felt like it was designed to be pushed through, but, Arseni had promised not to go too deep, so it stopped there. It was a little shocked to find out that Edon even had one of those valves, but it would ask about that later…

“Then you can forget about being stimulated where you want to be, or being allowed to cum. And forget about the wheel denting, too, I am not going to risk breaking a tooth for an insubordinate brat.” Edon stared daggers back at the Cherub, so horny it wanted to cry. 

“Insubordinate????” It replied, incredulous, “BRAT?!”

“You heard me,” The Cherub said. “You are being a brat.”

“Just because I think your title sounds stupid and pretentious?!” It retorted. Arseni started thrusting again, deliberately and slowly, barely passing over the parts that Edon now knew would contribute to its orgasm. The worst part was that this was still turning it on, it was still giving it a very nice feeling of fullness, but this just wasn’t going to be enough. 

“See? See what I have to put up with, with you?” It said, beginning to feel up the insides of its wheels again. “You are forgetting that right now, you are my toy to play with. If you are not going to defer to me and show me reverence… what makes you think I will care about your pleasure?” The Cherub teased. 

“T-the fact that there is NO way you can cum from a pace THIS slow, either!!” Edon retorted. 

“Oh, you do not know me at all, then.” The Cherub giggled, continuing, “I love this type of thing. If we had guests, I would be curled up with a slutty little Virtue in that nest for HOURS.”

“I hate you.” It grumbled. 

“Aw, I know that is not true.” It gave Edon a little kiss on the tops of its wheels again, and Edon was only a few milliseconds too slow to bite the Cherub. “Hey! That is not nice!”

“Go faster!!” It demanded.

“Not with an attitude like that! Now you will have to apologise, too.” It added, sounding very pleased with itself. “Unless you want me to stop entirely. If this is too much-”

“NO, I do NOT want you to stop!!! I just want you to fuck me PROPERLY!!!” It complained, “Instead you are just fucking around!” 

“I am playing with you how I want to play with you.” It corrected. “If my toy wants to be played with in a different way… it will have to beg me and show me reverence.”

“I already begged you!”

“But you acted out of line.” It ghosted its teeth over the rims of its wheels again, causing Edon to squirm and try even harder to just do this all itself, to no avail. It squeezed its muscles down there as best it could, trying to make the most out of at least being so nicely full of cock right now, but… no. It really needed the g-spot stimulation to cum like this.

“I…I…!” It could not believe it was really going to do this. It especially could not believe how fucking hot this was. “I… I apologise.”

“For…?”

“For being… rude.” It stated.

“And…?”

“...AND for saying your title is pretentious. It… it is kind of pretentious. But I should not have said that.”

“Okay, you are going to have to do better than that.” It halted, pressed against that valve again, which it was starting to realize probably felt pretty good for the other angel. Upon hearing its slutty moaning, it pulled out just a few milimeters, still touching the valve but just barely. Edon made a frustrated growling noise and cursed out the Cherub under its breath. “I will give you one more chance. Make it good, and use my title when you talk to me. Otherwise we are going to have a problem.” 

Edon tried to take a second to collect itself. On one hand, FUCK Arseni for doing this, FUCK Arseni for this being so hot, FUCK Arseni for not just giving in like Ezekiel would. On the other hand… it really wanted to cum, and it honestly did not want to find out what hellish thing Arseni was going to do to it if it didn’t bow down now. Edon had a pretty good idea, though, and wanted to cry in frustration picturing Arseni taking its sweet time slowly fucking Edon until it came, then pulling out and leaving the Throne a wet and horny mess to get itself off alone. 

“...I…I am sorry, Your Grace…” It said, very softly. “I. I fucked up. I. I was rude, I was… bratty. I… I should not have been touching myself without your… permission, I shouldn’t have snapped at you, I should… I should have been reverent and submissive and… um…” It wasn’t sure what else to say. Arseni slowly began to pick up the pace as it spoke, and it whined as Arseni slowed back down again when it stopped talking.

“Go on.” Arseni coaxed.

“Please, please keep going!!” It begged.

“There is something missing at the end of that sentence.”

“FUCK YOU!!!” It stopped moving again. “I- I mean, please keep going, Your GRACE!!”

“There you go, you’re learning!” Arseni said, giving in to the Throne’s requests and fucking it faster, returning to the angle it had been using in the beginning, which grazed its g spot and promoted a rapid escalation of Edon’s proximity to orgasm. It tried to keep begging, it tried to keep saying sorry for being so insubordinate, but as this went on, it rapidly lost its ability to form understandable words. Arseni was pleased to hear it try its absolute best to enunciate the words “Your Grace” while they fucked, and it kept its promise, continuing to stimulate the smaller angel exactly how it wanted (to the best of its ability. Arseni tried to understand and respond to Edon’s pleads of ‘please-right-there’, ‘do-not-stop’, ‘deeper-please-dont-pull-out’, but, some of the stuff it was saying was incomprehensible and Arseni was not going to violate it by reading its thoughts without explicit permission.)

“Imsoclosse, imgnnacum, fffuck, Your Grace, please bite me-!” It managed to enunciate, and Arseni had pity on it, selecting a location and biting down hard, enough to make small dents in its wheel but not actually break the surface. No matter, that was plenty to drive Edon over the edge. Arseni was pleased to learn how fucking blasphemous the Throne was as it orgasmed, dick not even all the way out of its sheath anymore from lack of attention, as it said something about the angelic hierarchy being bullshit. This felt totally different than other orgasms it had experienced before; pretty much just as intense, if not more so. A good amount of slick squirted out around Arseni’s cock from that gland; getting all over Arseni’s thighs and even getting a little bit on the couch and the carpet.

The Cherub fucked it through its orgasm, continuing to thrust even after the Throne was totally done, the gentle squeezing its cloaca was doing while it came finally starting to die back into little twitches.

“Very good, good toy…” Arseni praised, still gently fucking Edon, now at a greatly reduced pace, trying to keep it from getting overstimulated. “You gonna take my load inside you, past your valve?”

“Yes… please… I would like that,” Edon managed to say, eyes closed. It was exhausted. “I would be upset if you did not, at this point…”

“Well, I ask only because I do not know if you are on… birth control, or something…” It said, getting close. “I do not want to cum past your valve unless you can assure me you are not about to get pregnant.”

“No, I can’t get pregnant.” It said, confused. “Are you stupid? Why would I be able to get pregnant??”

“If you have a working valve you can probably get pregnant.” It explained, not sure how much Edon knew about this. It seemed pretty confidently incorrect right now. “Right?”

“What valve?? You mean the coverings?”

“You have a valve, like, in your cloaca!” Arseni said. It tried to go a little slower so as not to cum yet, hoping that Edon was just doing this thing that it did where it answered questions really indirectly instead of it actually not knowing that it was capable of getting pregnant. There was no way it didn’t know about this after living with demons for weeks… right? “It leads to either an oviduct or a womb, but yours is a womb because you knot. If you had an ovipositor like a wheelwork Throne-” It was kind of struggling with this now, being this close to the edge.

“A what?! No, it does not work like that!”

“Do you want me to pull out or not?!?” Arseni asked. “You have about five seconds to make a decision or I’m pulling out!”

“I just said don’t pull out!” It argued.

“A-are you SURE?!?”

“Of course I am sure!!!” It said, like Arseni was stupid. It rolled its eyes at the Cherub, seeming kind of pissed off, and Arseni, mind clouded by weed smoke and desire and rut, decided to trust it. What do I know?!? It probably knows more about its own body than I do… It held the Throne closer and picked up speed, pushing past its valve with a gentle pop and unloading directly into the Throne’s womb. It felt fucking incredible to cross that threshold, Arseni could DEFINITELY tell now what Iraa was talking about when it said Ophanim pussy hits different. The leaflets of the valve caught against its tip, keeping it in place. Pulse after pulse of cum collected behind the valve. It was designed to keep as much cum inside the body as possible. Edon could feel the warmth spread inside it, taking immense pleasure in the feeling of the Cherub filling it up, kind of wishing they had cum at the same time so that it could feel THIS while it came... The volume of ejaculate Arseni was capable of producing was far less than the average Throne, so, this was a good introduction for Edon, there was no stretch or cramping or discomfort... By the end of Arseni’s orgasm they were both very sated, and Edon felt sufficiently sore from all the biting.

“Fuck… you felt amazing…” Arseni said, slipping out of the Throne and watching a few rivulets of cum drip out of it. Most of what it had pumped into the other angel had stayed behind the valve, as God intended. “I’ve never slept with a Throne before.”

“And I have never even been penetrated!” Edon said. “Honestly, I did not know it was possible, I didn’t even know that those coverings could stay open like that to receive stimulation, I did not know that valve COULD be penetrated! I thought it was kind of a one way street?”

“What?” Arseni asked. “What are you talking about? Wait, you mean like, getting creampied?”

“No, I mean, you put your phallus inside my body, in my cloaca. I did not know those other two… valves, you called them? Opened like that, in that way. The ones underneath my dick, you spread them open with your fingers…?” It said. Arseni’s heart dropped to its stomach. “Um, I thought those stayed closed unless it was for, um, elimination, before you touched me like that. I… I thought… um… I did not know they could open all the way and pop into place…? You seem upset.”

“Edon…” It started. “That… those… those are your labia. The valve is at the very back of your cloaca, it leads to your womb.” It explained.

“...Oh.” It said. “Wait, that can’t be right. I thought I did not have one of those, because I have a phallus.”

“You have a valve!!!” Arseni said, way more concerned now.

“So?”

“SO?!?! So of course you have a womb!”

“I DO?!?”

“YES!!!” Arseni said, sitting much more upright now.

“Oh. OH…!!!” It thought a little harder about this. “WAIT!!! Can I get pregnant from that?”

“EDON!!! THIS IS WHY I ASKED YOU IF YOU WANTED ME TO PULL OUT!!!” Arseni tried its best not to actually shout, not wanting to freak out too terribly. “Edon, please don’t tell me you didn’t know anything about this!!!

“I… I told you I did not know if you could penetrate me!” It cried.

“I thought you meant you thought I was too big and wouldn’t fit!!!”

“No, I meant at all!! I do not know anything about any of this, I didn't even know I had a knot until I had sex with Isaiah and accidentally knotted him!” It said.

“How is that even possible!”

“I don’t know!!!” Edon looked really distressed now.

“But… but you are on birth control, right?! You talked to one of the several demons you know and they gave you instructions for that?” Edon tried hard not to make eye contact. “EDON!! Are you or are you not on birth control!!”

“I am not!!! I do not even know what that entails, for an angel!!” It admitted.

“Okay, then, you… you should take some kind of emergency contraception… I would not have done that at all if I’d known you were fertile.”

“You’re going to have to explain all this to me!!!” Edon said, on the verge of tears again. “Am I going to get pregnant?! Am I going to die?!”

“Shh, no, no, you aren’t going to die, my sweet Throne…” Arseni said, pulling the angel into an embrace. “Let’s go get you something to prevent a pregnancy, and take a shower, and I will teach you how this works. Also, here.” Arseni reached back over the couch to grab a towel or something. “Please clean up while I go get your…thing.” It said. “I really cannot afford to have a kid. And neither can you.”

“...Okay…” It said, trying to take a breath, getting off Arseni’s lap and trying to wipe cum and squirt off of itself and off of the couch and carpet. Arseni went to its bookshelf and pulled out a book, opening it up to reveal the hidden compartment inside. It pulled out three vials of frankly disgusting looking gray water. These are each single doses for a Virtue… three will be enough for a Throne, I’m sure… I hope so at least . It came back over to Edon, who was crying softly, trying not to make it too obvious and failing miserably.

“Oh, you poor thing…” Arseni said. It stopped trying to clean up and dropped the towel, closing its eyes and crying harder. “I’m here. Talk to me.”

“I-I do not know what is going on!!! That…. That whole thing we did… it felt really good, it was fun… but I am so confused and scared and I miss Earth and I do not know what will happen now!!! Pregnancy is terrifying!!! I did not know that could even happen to me, I did not know that was what we were doing, I, I did not know!!!”

“I’m sorry, Edon, I thought someone would have told you by now!” Arseni said, “Even if you did not learn in Heaven, I… I would have thought, I mean, you were hanging out with demons! Not just demons, you were hanging out with BARAQIEL, that guy never shuts up about pussy! And he gets humans pregnant ALL the time!”

“WELL, NOBODY TOLD ME!” It said. Arseni got down on its level, folding up its legs.

“Do you want to be held?” It asked. Edon bowed forward to signify that yes, it did. Arseni opened its arms and held the Throne as best it could, petting its wings and whispering to it that it was going to take care of it, it was here, it was not leaving and it would make everything make sense. “Shh… okay. Alright, are you feeling a little better now?”

“Mhm…” It looked up at the Cherub with its big wet eyes.

“Okay. I am going to try and explain better how your anatomy works to you, and I am going to explain this whole contraception thing. Okay? I promise you you aren’t going to actually have a child. I am going to fix this for you.”

“Thank you… um… I want to get cleaned up, too, I feel sticky…” It said.

“Oh, right. Yes. Let’s get in the shower then.” Arseni stood up, allowing Edon to follow right on its heels into the Cherub’s bedroom, and then into the adjoining shower. Edon marveled at both rooms and their majesty, wanting very badly to try out that bed later. The door to the shower opened up into a small room sized shower, with light pink and white tiling and pretty heart motifs tiled into the floors and the walls. There were multiple shower heads at different heights, several tiled benches, a gold wall rack that held numerous bottles of soaps, a cupboard for towels, and what amounted to the biggest fucking hot tub / bath type thing that Edon could fathom being even a little bit reasonable. It was entirely empty and had a drain in the floor that really looked more like a hole leading directly to a river, or aqueduct, or something. There was also a floor to ceiling mirror on one wall of the shower, which was a little disorienting.

“...Wow.” Was all Edon could say, staring at all this. It felt overwhelmed already.

“Here, it is better if we shower rather than bathe. I will start the water for you.” It said, pulling a handle and adjusting the temperature until it was very hot. Edon hesitantly got under it, pleasantly surprised by how nice that felt despite it being very close to boiling hot. “How is that?”

“Good,” It said, feeling a little better now. Arseni took off its garments and hung them up on a hook near the door, setting the three bottles down on a shelf and stretching its dual pairs of wings, setting up its own shower at the higher up shower head adjacent to the one Edon was under. It stared at Arseni, realizing it really hadn’t ever seen the Cherub naked. It definitely didn’t know Arseni had tits, four of them. Small, almost imperceptible ones, but tits all the same. Edon kind of wanted to put its mouths on them. The red-brown fur covering its oxlike legs trailed up and towards the center of its body, enveloping its entire dick and balls region and extending in isolated patches on the lower parts of its hips. While it was not hard, its dick was entirely retracted into its body via a sheath. Definitely had external balls, though. Almost disproportionately big.

“Enjoying the view?” It commented, ducking under the stream of water and running its hands over its heads, getting its fur wet and checking to make sure it did not need to shave its hair again on its human head. It knew full well it would get in a lot of trouble if it grew it out any longer than a few millimeters. Edon looked away, nervous that it would be upset now. It just laughed at the Throne and again bent down to its level. “I do not mind if you stare. In fact I encourage it.”

“… um. I… wow.” It looked at the Cherub. “I. I think you look very good naked,” It managed to say.

“Thank you. I think you look nice, too.” They looked at each other, and Edon almost considered asking for help getting clean to feel the Cherub’s hands slide all over its wheels again, but Arseni interjected before anything could get too sexy. “Oh, right, I almost forgot. You should take the plan B now.” It grabbed the bottles off the floor and uncorked one, handing it to Edon. “You have to drink it. It is not going to taste good.”

“...Is this literally plan B? As in, the stuff you get on Earth?” It asked, downing the first vial. It tasted very bad, like drinking dust off a nasty old temple floor or something. Despite being a liquid, it tasted dry and bitter. Arseni handed it the second bottle.

“No. It’s… um. It’s just dust I collected from the floor of some holy site mixed with holy water, technically this stuff is called Bitter Water, I just… I thought it would be kind of funny to call it plan B… y’know, B, for bitter? It uh. It causes infertility and miscarriages as long as the sex you are having is outside of wedlock. Lasts about a month, or, I guess, lasts about one full mating cycle, as in, day 1 of heat to day 1 of heat.”

“I have to drink this nasty thing every month?!” It asked, downing the second one. Arseni opened the third one.

“No, my lovely. You need actual birth control… this stuff will make you sick.”

“WHAT?!” Edon said, and Arseni looked at it with concern, holding out the third vial.

“No, you are going to feel like total shit for the next few days. A lot of cramping, vomiting, fatigue… you will also pass the products of conception, if there are any, or at least have some hemorrhaging…”

“I already drank two of them!!!” Edon said, really wishing Arseni had said something BEFORE it already did that.

“And you have to drink the third, too, or it is not going to do anything EXCEPT make you feel nauseous.” Arseni said. “You have more body mass than a virtue, and your wheels do not directly connect to your divine flame. So you will need to take more.”

“You did not even cum that much!” It complained.

“I came directly inside your womb, you fucking idiot!!! And we are BOTH in rut!!! You run almost a one hundred percent chance of getting pregnant unless you drink this shit!!!” It explained. Edon sighed and downed the third one. “Thank you. Ugh, I just feel awful for you, I… I am really sorry. I really thought you knew something I didn’t…”

“Thinking back on it, I definitely am at least partially at fault here.” It admitted. “You… um… you asked me multiple times and I brushed you off.”

“Yeah.” They both stood there in the hot water for a second. “Well, um… now is as good a time as ever for me to explain more to you. Would you be alright with me touching you down there again, or, would you prefer me to just explain it verbally?” It asked.

“I am not going to understand unless you show me directly,” It said, “And… and honestly I would prefer it if you touched me again. I. Um. I really, um… like the way you look naked.” It confessed. “I want to feel your hands on me again.” They positioned themselves so that Edon was back on the Cherub’s lap, and they could both see the mirror. Arseni parted its flame as much as it could, trying to make its genitalia even visible.

“Okay, so, you are not a wheelwork Throne, so, when you are not aroused, it is all closed up, like this. These things are your labia.” It demonstrated, showing Edon the three trilateral folds that were closed now. “Now, technically, you can be stimulated here without having your dick everted and still climax, but, it is generally considered to feel not very good because you can knot in your sheath, and that hurts. Some Ophanim are into it as a kink though.”

“We can skip that part. Please. I do not want to do that.” It said. Arseni nodded, moving right along.

“If you ARE aroused,” It gently ghosted its fingertips over the folds, trying to elucidate a reaction from the Throne. The top fold began to fold up, and its dick poked out through the opening it left.  “You get hard, and your phallus everts. I mean, you can also get hard without necessarily being aroused, but, that is another thing. I’m sure you’re aware by now how your dick works, I do not need to explain that to you.” It said.

“No, I understand that part.” It said.

“Okay, well, you already know that you knot, and you also probably know that the length of time you stay tied is based upon what exactly you’re doing and random chance. Like, if you are jerking off and you knot in your fist, you are going to have it up for maybe five minutes tops if you were REALLY into it, but if you tie perfectly in another Throne, right between the ridges? You could be there for like, five hours. It depends.” It explained. Edon made a note of this.

“I… I was aware it took different amounts of time… but… fuck. I thought there was something wrong with me.” It admitted.

“No, that is normal. Timing is highly variable, it is all over the place.” Arseni said. “Okay, so, going a bit lower..” It traced over Edon’s labia again, rubbing with a bit more pressure this time and softly spreading them apart again. “These labia cover and protect your sheath and your cloaca so you do not get any debris in there.” It explained. “So you have to deliberately try to tease them open. You can rub over the outside of them softly for a bit until they pop open on their own, which is called blooming… or you can just slide your fingers underneath and pop them open manually. But blooming feels… well. It feels a lot better. But I know you asked me not to do that, so, I’m not going to do that to you. Does that make sense?”

“Mhm…” Edon’s labia again ‘clicked’ back into place like they had been when Arseni was fucking with it earlier. It was watching intently, all of this was new knowledge for it. It had avoided exploring its body before out of fear that it would be painful or uncomfortable, but it was really glad Arseni was showing it all this…

“Now, on the inside of your labia… I do not know if there is like, an official, anatomical term for it, but these inner flap pieces here are referred to in the angelic sex and kink scene as ‘petals’ because they’re just so damn pretty!!!” It said, brushing over its petals and delighting in the way their iridescent patches caught the light as they twitched. “Yours are particularly pretty, I think. They come in a ton of colors, green is most common, but they can be pink, gold, red, blue, orange, yellow, purple… and clearly, silver, like yours are. They’re really really sensitive and you can cum from touching them, but… It’s a weird feeling orgasm. It can be REALLY intense if you do it right. A lot of Ophanim really like it, but it is an acquired taste.” 

“...I… do not think that would work on me. It felt… embarrassing.” It said. Arseni wasn’t going to push it, and Edon wasn’t going to explain its reasoning. So on they went. 

“That’s okay, you do not have to do it if you do not want to. Be aware though, that if you are fucking another Throne, they may be stimulated anyway because your petals usually touch... Now, underneath your sheath, you’ve got a cloaca.” It brushed its fingers over the slit, and Edon shivered. “If I push my fingers in here- is that okay?”

“Y-yes…” Edon tried not to show how turned on this was making it, trying not to meet its own eyes in the mirror.

“So when I put them in here…” Arseni did so, turning its hand to a better position, “And press up just behind the first set of ridges you have in there - I think those are to help a knot stay better, but I'm not sure- that's what I was doing earlier. It feels good, it's a very sensitive spot, kind of like a g spot or prostate, but it's neither of those things.” Arseni explained.

“Okay…” Edon softly moaned as the cherub touched it there. It continued to gently finger it while it explained the other stuff, as it saw how aroused this was making the Throne. Under less frantic circumstances, Arseni noted that Edon really liked that spot being rubbed in a circular pattern. Its dick wasn't totally erect, just the tip and an inch or two of shaft poked out, which was a shock to the Throne.

“Why am I not… out?” It asked Arseni, “I am very aroused…”

“Probably because I'm not stimulating you there, and you’re much more focused on this-” It pressed up into that spot again with a little more force for a second, causing Edon to keen upward and tilt at more of an angle. “Sometimes if you completely ignore your dick it'll stay partly inside the sheath, especially if what you're doing is fairly low intensity.”

“I… see.” Edon said. “Um… Can I touch myself?” It asked.

“Yes, of course you can.” Arseni said. Edon summoned a hand and wrapped it around its dick.

“T-thank you…”

“Of course. Our little game is over now, anyway, we are definitely in the aftercare section of this whole thing... But, moving along,” Arseni said, continuing to fuck with Edon’s g spot, “On the inside, way deep in there, you have a valve that leads directly to your womb. If you are able to get pregnant, which, clearly you are, maybe do not let anyone cum in that.” It chastised. “Also warn a guy, because you can technically get pregnant from just precum, although, that is pretty damn rare. There are rumors that cumming behind the valve instead of past it is sometimes enough to prevent a pregnancy, but… that is just a fucking lie.” It warned. “I, um, am horrifically sorry that I did that to you, cumming in you like that. I would never have done that if I'd known you were fertile, especially not… not like this.” It confessed. “If you were really serious about having a child and for some reason wanted it to be part Cherubim I would have made it WAY nicer for you. I would have laid you out on a bed of fucking roses and given you whatever your heart desired. You would also have Cherubim lining up to get to you first. Just… just be aware of that…”

“So how do I NOT get pregnant?!” Edon asked, “And can I get someone else pregnant?”

“I do believe you can get someone else pregnant, yes. And there are a few ways to not get pregnant.” Arseni explained. “First off, you can just not get penetrated. But nobody uses that method. Second, you can use bitter water exclusively. This… this is also a bad idea, because it begins to wear off at the end of the month and becomes much less effective, besides, it makes you feel very sick. Some angels take it just to suppress their mating cycle, because it makes them feel too nauseous to be aroused.” It explained.

“Okay, anything else?!” Edon said.

“There are demonic curses, those work really well and can be permanent. But obviously they are almost impossible to get in Heaven, plus depending on how you get one it can mark YOU as demonic, which would immediately get you felled... If you are in any way associated with Kasdeya I would ask him, he is amazing at these, but he does not work for free.” Arseni explained. “Alternatively you can use something that will prevent your valve from working, like a physical barrier, but that fails at a pretty high rate. Or you can use cursed metals, but those hurt a LOT going in and… I’m not exactly up on the trends, but, last I heard, they prevent you from using a form other than your true one. I could be mistaken though, technology has advanced since I was last in Hell.”

“Is that anything like an IUD?” It asked, thinking back to Isaiah explaining that to it.

“Yes, actually! It is not the same thing but, it is pretty close." It said. “You also have the option of doing what most angels do and drinking a premade elixir every day, but for that you have to have pretty good ties to the underground, because you actually have to drink it every single day or it isn't going to work, and it is one of those markets where the recipe is pretty tightly guarded.”

“Do you know what it's made of?” Edon asked.

“Not really, but I know that at least one component is wine or alcohol of some kind, because the manufacturers buy wine from my suppliers…” It said, and then stopped. “Oh no.”

“What?”

“Well… the wine trade is not doing great right now…” Arseni said.

“Oh. OH, OH no…”

“I can foresee this becoming an issue.” Arseni sighed. “Ugh… this is going to be an absolutely terrible few years…”

“Oh, shut up! You cannot even get pregnant!” Edon chastised, “It will not even impact you!”

“How many angels who CAN get pregnant are going to want to risk a pregnancy if they cannot prevent it?” Arseni asked. “This is going to drastically change the dating game.”

“You… um… you will still have me…” Edon offered. “Ezekiel will call again soon, I-I will ask him to ask Kasdeya about… my options.” It said. “I am sure he could make it. Discreet.”

“If you are seriously considering that, be aware it could be permanent.” Arseni warned. “If you ever want a pregnancy -”

“The idea of actually becoming pregnant makes me want to die.” Edon said. “I would rather be struck down.”

“Demonic curses are for you, then. I have actually met a Throne who spun his curse to his superiors as just that, a curse; he was like, ‘I went to earth, got in a fight with a demon and it cursed me to be this way.’ Worked, too. That guy got so much pussy after that… shame he did not survive his fall, he would have been a beautiful demon.” Arseni had not stopped fingering Edon, who was getting close again and wasn't really sure how to bring up its feelings about that. Arseni was almost absent-mindedly adjusting its angle and rhythm to what Edon was reacting to the most positively. It felt really good to do this in the shower, with the hot water still enveloping it, getting to sit in the Cherub's lap. But… something about this… it just didn't feel right anymore. This pregnancy talk was too much. It… it needed some time…

“I-I will look into it-!” Edon said, getting a little overstimulated. Now that it thought about it a little more, it didn't really want to cum a second time. It didn't physically feel bad. It was just … really uncomfortable mentally right now. Especially with all this pregnancy talk. It was a lot. That revelation had really shaken it. Despite the fact that it could feel itself getting close again… it just couldn't keep doing this. “Arseni…”

“Yes?”

“I… want to stop,” It said.

“Oh, I am sorry…” Arseni removed its fingers. “Are you alright? Was it not feeling good?”

“...Yes. I am… I am alright. And… it… it felt good, I just...” Tears pricked at the corners of its eyes again, and all its anatomic structures went back to how they were in an unaroused state over the next few seconds. “I, um… I am starting to feel sick.” That was only partially a lie. It definitely felt tired, and it was starting to feel a little bit nauseous. But mostly it just wanted to rest.

“So soon? Oh, maybe three vials was too much… you poor thing… how can I help you feel better?” It asked.

“I… um… I want to get clean, and then, um. Would you… lay with me on the pile of blankets next to the couch?” It asked. Arseni could tell it was feeling distressed about all this, and it truly did take pity on the angel. “I… I want to be close to you…” It managed to say.

“I can do better than that,” It said, kind of confused as to why Edon would ask to lay in a random pile of blankets rather than in a bed made in paradise. “I have that nice bed we walked past on our way to the shower. It is very nice, I have not had any complaints about it, anyway.”

“Oh. R-right…”

Arseni helped Edon, at the Throne’s request, to get soap everywhere and get dried off with a towel, moving the piece of fabric all over its wheel surfaces and succeeding in riling it up again. Really, Arseni just wanted to touch Edon, and Edon really wanted to be touched. Neither angel much cared how. But by this point, no matter how badly they both wanted a round two, the angels were tired and wanted to rest. Arseni laid down a towel on Edon’s side of the bed (“Because you are probably going to begin bleeding, and your manna will be difficult to wash out of my sheets,”) and brought an empty vase to the bedside table (“to throw up in, please try your best to only do that with one mouth at a time.”)

Arseni allowed Edon to get in bed first, following it in and curling up around it as best it could. At first it felt awkward to do so, but… Arseni felt as though it could get used to this.

“How is this?” It softly whispered once they got situated. “Are you comfortable?”

“Actually? Yes.” It said, surprised. “This… this was good. I am sorry about how it ended.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I… I probably shouldn’t have listened to you when you told me to cum inside you.”

“I mean the fingering. I… I do not know what about that situation made me feel upset.”

“You don’t have to know.” It said. “If it made you feel bad, that is all that matters. There does not have to be a reason,” It explained. “I am glad you told me to stop.”

“...I liked it, when you fucked me. And when you came inside me.” It said. “I do not want you to think that I didn’t like it…”

“I could tell.” It said.

“I mean, I don’t want you to think that I… don’t want it again, just, later…” It said. “I think all that talk about pregnancy… turned me off. I never thought I would say this but… I enjoyed being your toy. It was hot when you made me say those things, even though it made me feel frustrated.”

“I understand.” Arseni said. “I really do. I am glad you had fun, I love breaking brats.” If Edon could blush, it would be doing so.

Chapter Text

Author’s Note: I am going to do my best to space this out so that the Christmas Party chapter is actually posted on or around Christmas. That means there will be no other major loredump updates before then, so that I can make sure the Christmas Party Episode is canon-compliant. There will be other updates (cough cough, angel porn oneshots) and if you give me requests for pairings/scenes I will do them, provided you get them in in time.
I am starting this far in advance because… well.. I really want this Christmas party episode to be good. It will be long. It will be complex. It will be lore filled. It will contain SO MUCH sex, it will contain a no holds barred, no rules, fresh-out-of-Heaven-right-into-hell multidimensional sex party so epic that other Gods get jealous, and so much more. I hope I am not hyping this up too much. PUT IN YOUR REQUESTS NOW!!

+++

The two angels laid in bed for a long time just talking, and did in fact eventually both give in to the rut and have a nice round two under the covers. Arseni showed the Throne just how nice frotting could be, to say the least. They fell asleep together in a disorganized tangle of limbs and eyes and wings and wheels.

Edon woke up to a feeling of intense cramping and nausea. Arseni was dead asleep, naked, draped over it and very comfortable looking. Edon rolled its eyes and pulled itself out from under it, attempting to get up and get the phone, hoping that it could call Ezekiel as it was certain it had missed his last call at this point. The INSTANT it righted itself, it felt so sick it could barely see. The room spun, the edges of its vision began to fade out, and it was barely able to get out of bed and remember what Arseni told it about keeping its other mouths closed before it started throwing up. At least most of it got in the vase.

“Mhh… babe… come back to beeeddd…” Arseni whined, still half asleep, doing little grabby hands in its general direction. Edon was too busy dry heaving and cursing the Cherub’s name to respond. Tears pricked in its eyes and fell, only partially because of the nausea. This felt fucking AWFUL. It also felt freezing fucking cold outside of the covers of the bed, and once it thought that it was done throwing up, it attempted to get back in, only to find that it was too weak to fly any higher than it was right now.

And besides, once its vision went back to normal, it realized there was silvery liquid dripping from between its wheels and getting on Arseni’s carpet. Fuck… it had been right about the bleeding. This was easily the third worst thing that had happened to its body, and it truly wasn't sure what to even do about it now.

“Baaaaabe… come on…” Arseni still had its eyes closed. “ M‘so cold up here without you…”

“I-I am vomiting and bleeding and in pain!” It shot back, the speech being enough of a catalyst to start the vomiting again. It wasn't even sure what exactly it was throwing up considering it hadn't really eaten in weeks, unless you count wine.

Arseni didn't respond. It was asleep again. Edon couldn't find the energy to protest this, unsure of what the Cherub would or could even do to help anyway. It knew that, at least, that it needed help. This… this was too much. It dragged itself, the towel from the bed, and the vase that it had been throwing up in over to the main room to call Ezekiel. He would know what to do.

“Hello…?” Ezekiel said, picking up on the second ring. “Arseni…? It's like four am…”

“It is Edon,” The Throne said, sounding like it had just thrown up.

“Are you okay?” Ezekiel asked. “You sound like shit right now. Did something happen?” Edon was silent for a moment. It really did not have the energy to explain everything to him, and really just needed the support. It wasn't really sure how to get that without explaining anything, though.

“... Ezekiel,” It settled on, “Have you ever been pregnant before?”

“Yeah, ‘course I have.” He said. “Why? And before you say it, YES, I am sure that I'm not pregnant. I have received confirmation from reliable demonic sources.”
“No, no, I know that… I just… what did it feel like?” It asked.

“Bad. I felt nauseous and I was extremely upset about the entire situation.” He explained. “It felt like the worst thing imaginable, at least to me. I just… I don't think you would understand but, it just feels wrong to me that I had the ability in the first place. I'm a man, y'know? Having a pussy is all fun and games but being expected to be a shitty incubator for some fuckheads kid is just… too much.”

“What did you…do?” Edon asked. “How did you fix it?”

“The first time? The first time I had a miscarriage. I didn't even know I was pregnant until it started happening. The hospital was so confused when I came there, they were like, ‘youre supposed to be a man, why are you reporting vaginal bleeding’ and the second I explained I was transgender they immediately started calling me ‘girl’ and using feminine pronouns. When I tried to correct them they got so confused, they just left me in that ER bed bleeding while they stood around trying to ‘figure it out’ or whatever. Then they just sent me home and said it would fix itself, and the gynecologist they referred me to hung up on me when I tried to make an appointment because my voice is masculine.” He complained. “The second and third time I got an actual medical abortion, but that… uh.. you don't want to hear about that.” He said. “That story is less interesting.”

“Did it hurt?” Edon asked.

“Yeah. It did.” Ezekiel said. “Why are you asking me about this at four in the morning?” Edon paused for a good while trying to come up with something to say. “Oh, shit, wait, those weren't actual questions were they? Fuck, was this supposed to be phone sex? I'm sorry. Hang on lemme change my answers… uh, being pregnant was pretty cool… no… that's not sexy either…”

“No, no… Ezekiel… I… I would not do that to you.” Not anymore anyway, It thought.

“Then why are you asking about this? Wait, did you get someone pregnant in heaven?”

“NO! I… I found out that I can get pregnant, and, and I just had to take some fucking… shitty, disgusting tasting drink that is supposed to prevent that from happening, there was a… miscommunication.” It said. “I know it’s confusing, but I-” It paused to throw up again, trying to hold the receiver far from its mouth. It heard Ezekiel say something like ‘oh no…’ in a soft voice while it did so. “I don’t wanna explain it all right now… I feel so fucking sick…”

“Did you and Arseni have sex?” Ezekiel asked.

“...Yes…”

“Did it refuse to pull out even though you told it not to cum inside you?”

“...No… I asked it- well. I BEGGED it to cum inside me because I did not know I had a womb. That was the miscommunication, it thought I knew what I was talking about.” It explained. “Evidently… I do not. I hate how little I know about my own body. I keep LEARNING these things AS they come up, and it is almost never a good thing to learn. I have been around a long time, I do not like how different… how different it all is… and on top of that, this DRINK I had to drink, the SIDE EFFECTS…”

“Was it like angelic plan B?” Ezekiel asked.

“Kind of. My understanding is that bitter water is our only option for… emergency contraception AND abortion alike. Bitter water is-”

“I know what bitter water is.” Ezekiel sighed. “I am not surprised that Arseni has shitty covenant floor dust water on hand at a moment’s notice. And I am glad that it does, but, please tell it that Kasdeya and everyone down here have methods now that are far past the stone age… we have actual angelic and demonic plan B down here. Stuff that won’t make you sick. Emergency contraception that doesn’t cause you to bleed like bitter water does.” He explained. “It’s too late now. You… you should have called me. I’m sorry.”

“What could you have even done?!” It asked.

“Well, for one thing, I think you getting knocked up would be something I could have used to get your circular ass back down here.” Ezekiel said. Edon’s heart dropped.

“Oh…”

“Yeah.”

“...Can I still…”

“I’m sorry, Edon... I miss you. I really fucking miss you. And I’m sorry you had a scare like that. I know it really sucks ass.”

“It really does…” Edon said. “Everything hurts. I feel like my insides are melting. And Arseni is just, it is just asleep! In bed! While I throw up and hemorrhage and cry!” It cried, trying to fold up the towel underneath it so the manna would not stain the carpet any worse than it already had. “It was being so nice to me last night, it was making sure I was comfortable, it was gentle with me even while we played… now where is that?!?”

“Been there, brother.” Ezekiel said.

“I just want to go home…”

“I know you do, and, I really am working on it… we’re almost there.” He promised. “I’m working with Isaiah and Sarah- I mean Toby, sorry. He just changed his name.” Ezekiel said.

“Who is Toby?” Edon asked.

“Oh, I didn’t tell you? He just moved in. He’s cool, he’s another trans guy, he’s from the next city over and he came here because, uh… okay, don’t tell anyone but it’s because he shot and killed his fiance and needed to skip town. This guy is legit. He's a DJ. He uh… he’s also got history with Raphael, but don’t we all, at this point? Um. I mean, Toby specifically though, has every reason to. The guy is blind because of him, and I even had Hermani look at it. No dice, his eyes are FUCKED beyond saving.”

“Tell him he CANNOT have my space in the loft!” Edon exclaimed. Ezekiel laughed.

“Oh, don’t worry. He got an office. And besides, I promise, I’m keeping your spot in the loft nice and warm.” Ezekiel said. “I built you a shelf, too! It’s got padding and everything, and I don’t really have the ability to try it out, but it looks comfortable to me. Plus of course you can stay in the blanket pile with me if you want.”
“Good. That is MY blanket pile and I am not giving it up!” It said. “I miss that loft…”

“Well, you won’t have to miss it much longer, okay? Our whole phase one, Operation Mourning Star is almost ready to go. We haven’t really told Arseni a ton about it yet, but, basically, we were thinking of using Arseni’s pretty extensive contact list, recruiting some current angels including you, and having them start the gossip about what Earth and Hell are really like in comparison to Heaven, especially concerning God’s unethical and contradictory behavior. We’d need you to bring the other angels the information though, which is why we still need you there. Once we finalize the list of contacts and vet them with Arseni, we’ll give you the script, you can do your thing and you are home free!” Ezekiel said.

“How long is that going to take?!” Edon said, frustrated.

“...We were thinking no later than Christmas?” He said.

“Christmas is a whole month away!!!” Edon said, “Besides, that information is going to be covered up in an instant with propaganda from the Most High about how He is the Source of Good! If you want angels to self fell, that is not the way to do it!”

“Then what IS the way to do it?” Ezekiel said. “We had so many conversations about this. Lucifer was insistent this would work because it worked last time. He made a pretty good argument, he said that if angels knew how shitty God’s plan for humanity was, what they’d be expected to do to play a role in it all, and how nice Hell is now that Pandemonium is a real megacity with defenses, they’d choose to come down to Hell in droves rather than continue and support an evil God.”
“Not if they are not united in one cause, and not if Heaven is still tolerable.” Edon said. “And good fucking luck getting angels to unite behind any one cause individually. This is going to overcomplicate our job, you are relying on ANGELS randomly deciding to think for themselves. That has been beaten and threatened out of most of them. At this point, all anyone cares about is keeping the feathers on their back and tolerating immortal existence.”

“Okay… I will bring that feedback back to everyone.” Ezekiel said. “You bring up a good point… do you have any other ideas?”

“Well… I mean… not really! I haven’t had much time to THINK about this because of how crazy things have been up here with the alcohol market going under.” It explained. “Everyone is miserable, and you cannot brew alcohol in heaven, the yeasts will not stay alive.”

“The alcohol market crashed?” Ezekiel asked.

“Um… well… I am not pointing fingers, but, a certain Cherub cannot keep its mouths shut and Raphael found out that lower heavens Seraphim are lifting alcohol from Earth to sell and drink in Heaven. So I had to do some cleanup work and go INFORM them so that they could shut their operations down as I knew there would be increased surveillance, and they did not want to lose their market, so, they spread false rumors about URIEL getting upset so that Raphael’s angels would ALSO stop supplying… and now nobody can get drunk. And there are barely any more reserves for use in things like birth control, which is going to cause other problems…” Edon explained.

“Wait, that… that might actually be perfect!” Ezekiel said. “If everyone is sober and can’t have safe sex, that makes Earth and Hell seem WAY better. Is that not what caused YOU to decide to defect?”

“...I guess it is,” Edon said.

“I mean, if the alcohol market is obliterated, could we not then start shit by having our message be, ‘at least there’s wine in hell’?” Ezekiel said.
“We COULD, but there would need to be proof.” The Throne said.

“Easy! We could send our friends in heaven a few casks.” Ezekiel said. “Arseni could throw its Christmas party it won’t stop calling me about, word gets around… you know, it could be a whole thing!”

“We could not a kingdom fell with just the space in Arseni’s rooms.” Edon argued.

“No, but, I am willing to bet if it can’t keep its mouth shut about something so important, that it probably would be THRILLED to be told that this time, the party information SHOULD be spread to everyone it knows and more.” Ezekiel said, excitedly. “I… I really like this idea. We might be geniuses.”

“What even IS the idea again?” Edon asked.

“The idea is, we harness what we all know already about angels. Instead of trying to make it some ideological thing that most divine beings are too afraid to care about, we make it real simple…”

+++

Edon and Arseni sat on the couch (Edon still on a towel,) with the rotary phone receiver pointed up. Ezekiel had called for an emergency meeting, and the summoning circles Isaiah and Aethriel had set up on the floor near the altar of the old church lit up in such quick succession that Ezekiel had to look away so as not to have a seizure. Toby sat cross legged on the bench of the organ. Isaiah parked his wheelchair next to the front pews, where Aethriel was perched.
The chapel very quickly filled with a “who’s who” of the underworld. Ezekiel made direct eye contact with Isaiah, who had complained to him yesterday that he’d been spending way too much precious time fucking demons and not enough time focusing on their actual work. He remembered responding, ‘I am working,’ to which Isaiah had responded ‘having sex with demons is not a job.’ He’d said something akin to ‘It’s literally the oldest profession,’ to which Isaiah said, ‘fine, but it isn’t going to help us take out God.’ Now he was really eating his words: all of Isaiah’s plotting had been mostly confined to his work with Lucifer, while Ezekiel had half of Hell’s Most Wanted on speed dial and could probably get any of these guys to show up pretty much anywhere at this point.

The entire discord server’s worth of Watchers showed up, along with Lucifer and some of his generals, including Beelzebub. Asmodeus was there, and he immediately went to go speak with Toby before the meeting started. A few demons that Isaiah had NO idea who they were showed up, including Daniel, who arrived with four human women, one under each arm. He was a little impressed with Ezekiel’s demonic networking ability.

Once everyone was settled, Ezekiel got up behind the podium like he was a priest giving a sermon to the pews full of demons. He made a funny sight, in his Harvard hoodie and panties and nothing else. This was the outfit he’d been walking around in a lot lately, mostly out of convenience, but also because he REALLY liked the looks he got when he wore it.

“Everyone!” He started, “Demons! Angels! Humans! I have a proposal for Operation Mourning Star, and revelations about angelic nature that I think are very important! I talked with my colleague in Heaven, and we came to the conclusion that the current plan is NOT going to work!” There was general disagreement with this statement in the crowd. “Think about it! How many of you fell from heaven by choice for ideological reasons ONLY, meaning, NOT because you were horny or wanted to get drunk.” A few hands went up, including Lucifer and Beelzebub, as well as Aethriel. “And how many of you were thrown from heaven because you FUCKED HARD?” A lot more hands went up, including every Watcher in attendance. “Okay!!! Out of you who have your hands raised, how many of you were terrified of God before you fell, or otherwise probably wouldn’t have rebelled if you hadn’t been caught doing something you knew you weren’t supposed to do?” A few hands went down (Azazel being one of them,) but a good deal stayed up, including Baraqiel, Daniel, Kokabel, and Arteqoph. “And how many of you found the prospect of partying and fucking hard on Earth too tempting to pass up?” Hands went back up.

“I see where you are going with this, but, I simply do not think enough angels are THAT horny.” Lucifer said. “It is VERY unlikely to me that angels would decide to leave heaven if our message was ‘come down here, human pussy is pretty good.’ They have sex with each other in heaven just fine.”

“I am inclined to disagree with that,” Samyaza argued.

“You are an outlier and should not be counted.”

“Look around you. Sixty percent of us here are Watchers, we all fell for the pussy. And might I add, it was fucking WORTH IT.”

“Still, I do not think it would be enough for the AVERAGE angel, especially one who is already afraid of punishment!”

“I agree with you both to some degree!” Ezekiel said. “Edon!!! Your turn, tell us about the wine situation!” He put his phone on max volume and held it up while Edon briefly explained the wine market collapse in Heaven, trying hard not to implicate Arseni.

“Are angels really so reliant on alcohol nowadays?!” Beelzebub spoke.

“Oh… um… If I may answer this one,” Aethriel piped up, “Yes, yes they are. Especially the Seraphim and the Messengers... When I was in heaven just a few months ago, I was… oh, I must have been drunk almost twenty percent of the time. And I was not the worst one by a long shot.”

“It is also a necessary manufacturing component in the only type of birth control available in Heaven, as well as the only available heat and rut suppressants. Both need to be extracted, and alcohol is the only way to do it.” Kasdeya said. “That is really going to make things bad. Sex and drugs are the only two things that make life in Heaven bearable. Take those two things away… you are going to have a very upset populace.”

“EXACTLY!!” Ezekiel said. “So, the idea is, what if we scrap the propaganda idea. What if instead of meticulously trying to unite angels towards a moral cause that they may not accept or may be too AFRAID to accept, we just say fuck all that, and throw the craziest, sluttiest, most alcohol and sex fueled bangfest of a party that has ever been thrown!” Isaiah perked up at that. He hadn’t been to a rave in a good while…

“And then what?!” Argued Beelzebub. “Who is to say that angels will even show up on Earth for this? It will just put a huge target directly on OUR back. I say absolutely not.” He concluded.

“We have a plan for that too.” Ezekiel said. “Arseni, say your thing.”

“Um, hello everyone!!” Arseni started. “I am sure you are all aware of me, I am your trusty angel-on-the-inside, in Heaven still, haha…” It laughed nervously. Eyes rolled. “Um, but, you see… I… I am quite known, actually, in Heaven, for my parties! And I was thinking, well. I have a knack for grabbing the attention of relatively purehearted virgins and experienced sinners alike. I am certain I could start the party here in heaven, especially once the last of the alcohol stock in Heaven has completely dried up, which I anticipate will be around Christmas if things go like they have been going. I have a huge network of friends throughout Heaven’s underground scene. I already throw a pretty wild Christmas party every year, and, this year, if you all are willing to supply me, I am absolutely certain I could get a turnout in the thousands, if not tens of thousands.” Interested and skeptical looks were shared between demons.

“And where will the venue be?” Lucifer asked.

“If you all give the go-ahead, I will begin by contacting my friends in the adjoining rooms in the Mansions. I am certain they will accept it if I can promise them alcohol and ass, which I can. I have done this before, my Christmas party in ‘69 spanned fifty different angel’s rooms. I have contacts at the Virtue Academy, I know angels on the Lust Council, I am fully prepared for a no-holds-barred orgy of a party that has never been seen before. The idea then is, that we will of course get caught doing this, eventually... But there will be too many of us to stop. We will all be united by two things much easier to obtain than ideology: fear and lust. I think THAT NIGHT we will see angels fall intentionally, rather than face the wrath of the lash.”

“At that party,” Ezekiel picked up, “we will make sure to advertise very much that there is an afterparty on Earth. This afterparty. As for the venue, Lucifer, I was thinking we would hold a massive rave.” Isaiah really started liking this idea. “Aethriel alone was able to scam some humans out of this kickass church. I’m sure we could figure SOMETHING out to book that stadium in the middle of the city. Humans will be there for sure if we advertise it right. It will be amazing. We could open up a huge portal straight to Pandemonium’s Central Concert Hall and have a cross-dimensional fuck-rave the world has NEVER seen and is NOT ready for.” He said. Lucifer seemed to be considering this pretty strongly. Beelzebub looked stressed and upset by all this.

“And you actually expect this to work?” He said.

“I don’t know, man,” Lucifer said. “I am starting to see their side of this. Better to get fucked up and laid in Hell than stay sober and celibate in Heaven!”

Chapter Text

Isaiah was outside picking up his meds from the pharmacy when he encountered a situation he was all too familiar with.

“I have this for you.” The angel said, standing on the street corner holding a package. It was wrapped in bright pink paper with a gold bow, and Isaiah was instantly aware of what was going on.

“Is it from Arseni?” He asked, wheeling over to grab the package. It was HEAVY, much heavier than he’d expected considering the size of it. It was only about eighteen inches long and not very wide. Isaiah perked up in excitement, pretty sure that he knew what it was.
“Yes. Please do not tell anyone I was here, Arseni told me I would get in a LOT of trouble if I was discovered on Earth right now!” The messenger begged, looking genuinely afraid.

“What’s your name?” Isaiah asked.

“K-Kiron…” Kiron said, brushing his deep brown hair out of his eyes. He was in human form, now, and looked pretty uncomfortable in it. Isaiah had been getting a lot better at identifying angels in human form, although he still wasn't perfect; he clocked Kiron because he was just standing there, awkwardly, holding that box like he'd just been dropped in behind enemy lines without a gun.

“Look, Kiron, I got something for you, too.” He said, pulling a pre-roll out of his jacket pocket and handing it to the angel. “Take this with you. Don’t hurry back to Heaven. Go sit over there by the water and smoke this thing, take a few hours to relax. I’m kind of busy right now but, if you go down to Light Street, there’s a place called Glory Club. It’s a bathhouse. Have yourself a night. Here.” He handed the angel some money, too, as he knew there was a cover.

“Bath house? Oh, a bath would be lovely…” The angel replied, taking the pre-roll. “Thank you, human.”

“No problem. Use a condom.” He said, turning and heading back towards the chapel.

Aethriel was nowhere to be found at the chapel when Isaiah first returned there. Isaiah had really wanted to open this up with Aethriel, but… he had no idea where it was, and was also kind of worried that Aethriel would get really angry if it learned that this was from its current least favorite Cherub. So he set the package down on the floor of their shared room and tore it open. Inside was a very nicely wrapped metal dildo. To be perfectly honest, it didn’t really look like a dildo. It looked like a piece of some industrial machine or something. It had an oddly shaped bulb at the end, and was very slightly curved at an odd angle. It had a handle which was tightly wrapped in leather. It was way too big for Isaiah, but he'd known that already. This thing was worth more than its weight in gold to him for a completely different reason. He inspected the object from multiple angles but was unable to figure out how to turn on the vibration settings that he’d heard so much about. Then he noticed that it had come with a letter… written in Latin. FUCK. He couldn’t read Latin.

“EZEKIEL!!” He shouted, “Can you come in here, I need your help translating something!”

“Yeah, hang on.” Ezekiel said, coming into the room about two minutes later holding a calculator and a plate of wings. He was shirtless and there was barbeque sauce on his tits. “Holy shit, what IS that?”

“What does it look like it is?”

“It looks like a dildo.” He said. “But that thing is WAY too big for you, dude, and it’s METAL, it’ll have no give at all!” He wiped the sauce off with a finger, sitting down.

“Yeah, it’s not FOR me. Can you read this?” He said, handing Ezekiel the letter. He handed Isaiah the wings and looked it over, eyes going wide.

“Uh, yes I can read it, and WOW… Arseni is just GIVING this thing to you?!” He asked, looking shocked.

“This and more, it did almost kill me and incinerated everything I own into a pile of ash, so, it’s kind of the least it can do.”

“Point taken. Okay, want me to write down a word for word translation or are you cool if I give you the general vibe?”

“General vibe for now, but a word for word would be nice later, too.” He said, going back to his inspection.

“Okay…. It says,

Hello, Isaiah, sorry for burning down your home, I know that you lost a lot of your things and almost died and I apologise. I will replace all of them in time, but I was packing up my things for the planned fall on Christmas and I found that dildo we talked about earlier…

… then it says some stuff about how packing up is going, blah blah blah, stuff about the angel that delivered it having a hard time recently so go easy on him…

This is an original piece, this thing was used in the actual trial runs… the only thing it doesn't have is the vibration, which was the finishing touch on the final product, but in my opinion the vibration is entirely overkill and you will not miss it… This thing was designed to get the largest possible amount of gametes out of Seraphim in the quickest possible amount of time for the now-defunct Abiogenesis of Replaceable Angels Program, and this design was scrapped because it felt too good and took too long. It was designed by an angel called Gathon who I knew very well and respect very much… he is dead now…

then there’s a section about how the casting was done but I don’t know what the fuck Arseni is talking about here, I’d have to pull out a dictionary…

Despite being scrapped in part for ‘taking too long,’ my personal record using this device is fifteen seconds and Gathon could do it faster than that even with the prototypes. It works wonders on Seraphim, especially if they react well to g spot pressure or are already squirters. I would recommend putting down a few towels if you value your furniture. Have fun. Love, Arseni.

P.S. This is one of those divine knowledge things. You are gonna need help figuring this one out, so, I wrote this in a language you can’t read so that you have to ask for at least one more person to help you. Hello, Ezekiel, if you are reading this, I am excited for our threeway and I’m counting down the days. I tried this thing out on Edon and it came so hard it cried and called me Mommy. Love you.”

“Oh, this is gonna be so good.” Isaiah said, putting it back down in the box and handing Ezekiel his wings back. “Thanks man.”
“Hey, hey hey, wait. I’m sorry. THANKS?” Ezekiel replied. “I think that I deserve more than just a ‘thanks man.’ I want in on this.” He declared. Isaiah thought it over. There had been a meeting that Ezekiel slept through where compensation for particularly difficult jobs in this planning process had been discussed, and there had been a general conclusion that Edon had kind of gotten a bum deal considering the role it had played. A pact had been made to try and make that up to it at least in part by denying Ezekiel until the Throne’s return, so it would have a desperately horny human to come home to. But… Ezekiel wasn’t supposed to know about that, and as long as he didn’t get any pleasure out of whatever happened next... it was probably fine. Baraqiel had been getting blowjobs from him all week anyway…

“...Fine, but, no face sitting, that’s my seat.” He said.

“Goddamn it! What is WITH you guys lately?!” He said, “I miss one fucking meeting and now I’m just being punished for it until this shit is over, is that it?”

“No, dude, I just want you to be focused while you help me try and figure out this new toy.” He said. “I do actually need help, I think this thing is going to take multiple human minds to figure out.”

“Can I also invite Toby?” Ezekiel asked. “He’s fucking amazing with his fingers, he fingered me within an inch of my life a few days ago. He keeps making all these references to playing the guitar while he’s doing it, too, it’s like a game to him, he plays you like a fucking instrument.”

“Yeah, I’m intrigued by that, not gonna lie.” Isaiah said. “HEY TOBY?”

“Yeah?” He walked by the room, almost as if he’d been outside the door eavesdropping this entire time.

“You wanna finger me?” He asked.

“Sure, why not.” Toby said, folding up his cane and putting it in the back pocket of his jeans. “I also heard something about a ridiculous dildo from Heaven or something, can I try that out? Asmodeus is holding out on me.”

“Sure, we just gotta wait for Aethriel to get back.” He said, as Toby got down on the ground with the other two men and picked up the dildo, touching its surfaces.

“WOW. This thing just FEELS powerful.” He said. “I think I got a good idea of how to use this.”

“How is that even possible? You have no experience with this at all!” Isaiah said. “I'm gonna be the one to use it.”

“You asked for my pussy skills you’re gonna get my pussy skills.” Toby replied.

“And you asked me to translate that letter, so, you basically owe me.” Ezekiel said.

“Well, how do YOU think we should do this?!” Isaiah asked. The three men moved to the mattress on the floor in the room to debate this topic. As time went on and discussion got heated, all three lost their clothing…

“What are you humans doing? Why are you all in here together, did any of you do anything at all while I was gone?! You were supposed to get the calculations done-” Aethriel asked as it approached the doorframe. It could hear them all fucking around up here when it came in downstairs, just having gotten back from setting up a few of the open bars at the venue for the Christmas Rave. It made its way around the doorway and then stopped, staring at the scene in front of it. Ezekiel, Toby, and Isaiah were tangled together half on half off the bed, with Toby’s fingers deep in Isaiah’s cunt and Ezekiel making out with him, connected now by a thin strand of saliva as he'd pulled away to turn his head to look at the angel.

Then it noticed the dildo.

“W-where did you get THAT!? What is that?!” It asked.

“Oh this? This is our new toy and we’re trying to figure out how to play with it. Here, do you want to read the note?” Ezekiel said, handing the note to it. It skimmed the page. Aethriel’s eyes went wide as it began to understand what this thing did. It actually remembered the Abiogenesis program quite well; Seraphim had been LINING UP to get a spot in the research trials for it, especially with Gathon’s office. Clearly there was a reason for that. It hadn't worked out, though, as God figured out how horny everyone was about it and decided that okay, attempting to desexualize procreation was not working, and was in fact undercutting the point.
Aethriel had never been considered for the trial because of its criminal record and some complicated numerological reason having to do with its date of hatch, but, it remembered feeling inexplicably jealous watching other Seraphim come back from Gathon’s office unable to fly straight. It had caught whispers of “so good” and “came like 20 times” and “numb down there for days.” It kind of felt stupid, now, not realizing back then that Gathon was trying to fuck, at the time it had just felt jealous from being left out of something that just seemed like good clean fun.

“Actually we were waiting for you to get here,” Toby said. “Lay down, will you? We want to test a few theories.” Toby said. He patted a spot in between Isaiah and Ezekiel on the bed. He pulled his fingers out of Isaiah with a wet pop, and he licked them clean in a fairly obscene way while Aethriel stared from the doorway, conflicted.

“You guys are really making this difficult for me…” Aethriel grumbled, trying hard to resist this, but, come on. It loved being played with and dominated by humans that wanted to make it feel good, and it had been so busy lately… “We are going to get so behind…”

“We're already behind,” Toby said, laughing. “Might as well be behind AND satisfied.”

“Yeah, and we need your help settling a debate,” Ezekiel said. “We've been in here for like an hour discussing how best to fuck you with this thing, and we can't figure out which one of us is right.”

“You have been in here talking about this for AN HOUR?!” Aethriel was actually a little upset hearing that, “You were supposed to finish the numbers for the attendance estimates!!!”

“Yeah, well, we were also watching porn, too, so… that took up some time also. Also, not going to lie to you, I don't even know why you guys gave me that job.” Ezekiel said. “I hate math and I can't see the future, not even a little bit. I feel like they probably should have given that job to you. I could have gone to the stadium and set things up.”

“How many times have I told you that you actually CAN see the future?!” Aethriel replied. “If you would simply let me teach you scrying-”

“C’mere already!” Toby commanded, taking his shirt off the ground and tossing it in Aethriel’s general direction.

“Yeah, come over here!” Isaiah coaxed, picking up the dildo. “At least come get a look at this thing, it's pretty impressive. Apparently the casting is a complicated process, feel how the weight shifts when you tilt it? I've been informed it-”

“It ruins Seraph pussy? I know.” Aethriel replied, shifting on its feet. “You are forgetting I was THERE.”

“You've tried this before?” Isaiah asked, gasping as Toby put his fingers back inside his cunt, blatantly fucking him in front of the angel, who was getting jealous. It wasn't entirely sure who it was jealous of at this point.

“No!!! I wanted to, but… things did not work out that way.” It said. “T-the angels that did try it had nothing but good things to say…”

“Then what are you waiting for?” Toby asked, again patting the spot in between the three humans. “C’mere. Take a break. Let us play with you, we wanna play with your pussy.”

“Yeah, Aethriel, don't tell me you're so into this job that you're gonna pass up the opportunity to let three humans compete to see who can make you cum the hardest with this legendary object.” Ezekiel said.

The pause that followed lasted long enough that everyone could tell the humans had won the argument. Aethriel sighed and approached the bed, watching Toby pull his fingers out of Isaiah again so he could reach out and touch the angel as it settled down in bed. It kind of propped itself up on the mattress to allow them access to its pussy, and Ezekiel and Isaiah helped by holding its legs apart and resting those on their respective laps.

“Oh good, I get to go first.” Toby said, trailing his hand down until he found the Angel's entrance, gently beginning the session by testing it and rubbing at it. “Oh, wow. You're pretty wet too. Everyone is wet today…” He spent a little while rubbing and teasing at the external tissue, enjoying the way Aethriel ground back against his hands.

“You said you were going to fuck me…” It complained, jolting as Ezekiel and Isaiah toyed with its feathers and fucked with its wings. Isaiah reached for the one on the bottom right, correctly guessing that it could use some attention considering how much flying Aethriel had been doing recently that involved carrying heavy shit around. It melted into the touch, greatly enjoying the feeling of being petted like this.

“So impatient! Wow. Maybe I'll have to make you wait longer now.” Toby teased, picking up the dildo anyway. Aethriel made a soft sound of protest, but Toby continued before it could come up with a coherent request. “Just kidding. I'm way too horny not to just put this in you. You're more than ready for it.”
“Be gentle with me!” Aethriel requested, “I do not like it too rough…”

“Noted.” Toby said, softly pressing the bulb on the end of the tool to the angel’s entrance, starting slowly with gentle pressure. He expertly maneuvered it so as to press in with JUST enough force that it felt like he was only teasing, rubbing the bulb over the sensitive flesh, when in reality that pressure was slowly sliding the bulb past its muscles and into the Seraph’s cloaca. It popped inside it fairly easily, and Toby pressed it in further, sliding the bulb gently deeper. “How does that feel?”

“I-It feels like there is a piece of metal inside me.” It said, pretty underwhelmed.

“Okay how about now?” Toby tilted the angle of the metal rod, pushing it in a little further and rocking the barbel downwards, putting pressure right on its g spot. It almost felt like a lockpick sliding just right into a lock and popping it open. Aethriel couldn't even answer the question. It fit perfectly into the space it was supposed to go, oddly shaped bulb compressing its anatomical structures in such a way that it almost stimulated the nerve cluster supplying that area directly.
“Ffffuck-!!!!!” It managed to say, holding still so that Toby didn't lose the spot by accident. He laughed and gently slid the toy back and forth over the area, rocking it gently downward and applying firm pressure to that spot. Aethriel felt dizzy, not even sure which direction to tilt its body to get more stimulation. The metal was cool and smooth and unforgiving and Aethriel REALLY liked it.

“So, MY theory is that it needs to be used essentially like a g spot dildo.” He said. “You gotta treat it like a g spot until proven otherwise, anyway, I don’t know what Seraphim have. It’s tried and true, firm rocking pressure, slide it around like this…” He dragged the bulb a bit further down and a bit further up, distributing the pressure and causing the Seraph to drip fluids onto the floor. It felt like it was being milked, or something, the way it just kept getting wetter. Isaiah frowned.
“No, no… you have to push it deeper than that, there's a second sensitive spot back there and it only makes sense that it's for that one because the toy is so long.” He argued. “Since it's for gamete collection, it would only make sense that it needs to be put closer to the oviduct.”

“Both of you are too small brained for this.” Ezekiel said. “It's clearly supposed to be an adjunct to external stimulation. Have you guys never squirted before?”

“I-I think you should do less arguing and more fucking me,” Aethriel said, shifting itself to more readily present itself for the experimenters.

“Hey, if we want your opinion we'll ask.” Toby said, and Aethriel mumbled a soft apology, hopeful that he'd keep it moving soon. He picked back up again, driving pressure into the spot it found to be its favorite, as evidenced by its soft pleads of ‘more!’ and ‘right there!’ It only lasted another twenty seconds after that, with Toby fucking with its pussy in that way, before telling the humans it was going to cum if they kept that up.

“Are we gonna let it cum?” Ezekiel asked Isaiah. Aethriel trained an eye at Isaiah, pleadingly hoping he'd say yes as Toby slowed down his movements in preparation to edge the fuck out of the angel instead of pushing it over the edge.

“I dunno…”

“Please!!!” Aethriel begged. “Please, fuck, please, I am so close, I, there is, Toby, if you just- a little more!” Part of this was frustrating because this tool was not meant for human hands. This thing was meant to be wielded by Cherubim, and even Aethriel didn't know how to actually use it. It felt like he was SO close to doing it right, though…

“Hmm… well, I guess it's okay for it to cum…”

“Perfect.” Toby said, changing his angle and pressure just a tiny bit and sending Aethriel reeling. It squirted all over the floor underneath them as Toby rocked against its g spot, sending silvery clear liquid pooling between its legs as Toby reveled in the angel's soft noises and twitching and how hot the metal of the toy got as it came. “See? Easy. Like picking a lock. Isaiah, you're stupid if you think pushing it deeper is gonna do jack shit, and Ezekiel, your idea is basically cheating and makes no sense in the context of the development of the device.” He concluded.

“You don't even know who Gathon is! That would be very on-brand of him, from what I know about the guy,” Ezekiel complained. “And I'm honestly shocked you would sit here and tell me that playing with the clit is “cheating”, that is actually insane.”

“Clit?!” Aethriel managed to chime in, “I do not… even have… a clit…” It was shaking and whimpering and very close to overstimulation with the way Toby was still rocking the dildo forward and back, only a little gentler.

“You definitely have a clit.” Ezekiel said, reaching down and toying with the erectile tissue surrounding its entrance, thumbing over it in gentle circles, then back and forth quickly over one of the corners of the generally triangular shape of its pussy. Aethriel made a strangled gasping sound as it came again within twenty seconds of Ezekiel fucking with it like that, almost unable to process the multiple sensations that were happening down there all at the same time. This time it got a little bit of cum on the bed sheets, too. “See? The letter said Arseni could do it in fifteen seconds, but I’m sure it’s had practice. It took me twenty, but it took YOU like 120 just fucking with its pussy.”

“You’re fuckin’ CHEATING!” Toby exclaimed. “Who’s to say it isn’t because of what I was doing with the toy, maybe you made it take LONGER!”
“Both of you assholes don’t understand how Seraphim anatomy works.” Isaiah interrupted. “Hand me the thing. Ezekiel, stop playing with its clit.”
“Do not listen to him!” Aethriel said to Ezekiel, to no avail as the human obeyed Isaiah and took his fingers away. It whined softly as Toby let go of the dildo and switched places with Isaiah, occupying his hands now with Aethriel’s wings. He focused on the top two wings, sinking his hands into the soft feathers and gently tugging on them as he withdrew. Isaiah got in the proverbial driver’s seat, repositioning the toy to point up instead of down.

“You alright, angelface?” He asked, sliding the toy deeper into its pussy, drawing a soft moan from the creature.

“Better than alright,” It replied.

“You’re still able to form coherent sentences though.” Ezekiel said. “Isaiah, I love ya, but there’s no way that that thing is for an A-spot.”

“Shut up, let me figure this out!” He said, pressing the bulb back and down, singling out the spot he'd learned about from that time he had to teach Aethriel about the importance of a flared base when your orifice doesn't have an easily accessible endpoint. That was a phone call he'd taken before as a paramedic.

He used the toy more like a dildo on this spot, sliding it back and forth and hitting the spot as best he could repeatedly. The weights in the toy made a muted clanking sound as he did this, slamming it with extra pressure on each thrust. Aethriel felt like it was going to pass out. The spot he was hitting was very close to the ring of muscle that delineated its oviduct, a place that Aethriel didn't even know could feel this good to stimulate.

“P-please will you…!” It began to request, not even getting entirely through the request for external stimulation before it was cumming again for a third time, drenching Isaiah's hand as he continued to pound it, not letting up even a little bit. He was able to chain two orgasms together, sending it back into ecstasy almost immediately after it came down the first time, reducing it to a slutty mess of soft whining and feathers on their shared bed.

“There you go… just let it happen… that's right…” He instructed, continuing on again for a third one. Aethriel wasn't making much sense at this point, saying something barely coherent in a language none of the humans present could understand as it writhed under Isaiah’s careful hands. After what it was saying started to sound like pleading and Ezekiel explained he wasn't positive, but he was pretty sure Aethriel was telling him it was really overstimulated, he had pity on the angel and slowly, carefully removed the object from its pussy. It stayed face down on the bed, cloaca still dripping genetic material slowly as it recovered from that.

“Fffuckk… ohhhhh…. oh my God….” It managed to say in a language more of them could understand, “T-that was… incredible…”

“See, I told you it goes deeper in there.” Isaiah said.
“I dunno, there was a LOT more cum when I did it.” Toby argued.
“But it took way less time when I did it!” Ezekiel argued back.
“All of you are SO close minded.” They all whipped around to look at the doorway, in which Azazel stood, flicking a butterfly knife around in his hand expertly. “You're also all REALLY loud. Did you forget I was coming here?”
“...A little.” Ezekiel said, embarrassed. This was supposed to be his jewelry change appointment, he'd called and said he wouldn't be able to make it down to Hell due to not being able to get there on his own, and Azazel had told him he'd be there to escort him in about an hour. That was like an hour and a half ago.
“That's actually kind of adorable.” He crossed the room, putting the knife in his belt and taking the dildo out of Isaiah's hands. “Move, yeah? Let a real pro show you how it's done.” He slipped the toy back into Aethriel with no hesitation, and moved it around until he found its g spot, which took a fraction of a second. “You're all SORT OF correct.” He confirmed, “But if you want to use this how it was intended, I mean. You would first have to ask how it was actually intended to be used. Gathon’s intention was to fuck Seraphim into such a state of delirium and submission that they'd forget the name and face of God in favor of coming to his office to get their pussies teased and pleasured relentlessly, again and again. This thing was designed for multiple, messy, overwhelming orgasms in quick succession that could be generalized to basically any Seraph regardless of their preferences. Does this one have a vibration function?” He asked. “I can't find the runes.”
“Arseni’s letter said it was a prototype, so it didn't have that part.” Ezekiel explained.
“No matter, here…” He removed the toy and pulled out his knife, expertly carving a very complicated and also very small set of symbols near the handle of the toy into the metal. He fucked around with them for a second with his thumb, and the humans watched in amazement as it started vibrating at what Isaiah considered to be a pretty low power setting.
“T-that is going to be too much!!!” Aethriel said, looking at this whole scene play out with the eyes on its back and wings, unwilling to leave its comfy position while this floaty from the afterglow. “I am far too sensitive!! Even if I had not just come five times!”
“I'll turn it down.” He messed with the settings again until it was barely buzzing. Aethriel looked at the object with suspicion. “Look, the POINT is that it's just a little too much. It's a little too big to slip in with no prep, it's a little too powerful, it's a little too easy to make your partner cum over and over and over again. If you get good with it you can use this thing to absolutely RUIN a pussy for days, I do not have the time today but one of these days I’m gonna show you the rosary game...”
“Well, at least do not turn it on until it is INSIDE.” The Seraph pleaded, “If you put it on the outside, it will not feel good.”
“What are you talking about??” Azazel said. “Isaiah, what have you been doing to this poor thing?”
“I dunno!! It just doesn’t really like vibrators on its clit!” He explained.
“Nobody doesn’t like vibrators on their clit.” Toby said, judgmentally.
“Yeah, no, seriously, are you doing it right?”
“I don’t know if you know this, but Aethriel spent thousands of years on the straight and narrow in Heaven, and I was born twenty six years ago. Neither of us know how Seraph clit works. We are figuring this out as we go. Care to enlighten us, O Mr. High and Mighty?” Isaiah asked.
“I am TRYING to.” He said, bringing the toy up to Aethriel’s entrance and slowly, softly tracing around it, ghosting over the sensitive flesh. Aethriel jolted and tried to chase the sensation, to no avail. “It is pretty fucking sensitive, even for a Seraph, I’ll give you that. What settings were you using on your vibrator?”
“... I was just turning it all the way up…” He admitted. Azazel rolled his eyes.
“You’re an idiot.” He said, “You gotta use something really soft. This thing is delicate, there are no plates or anything, the outside of it is practically an exposed nerve ending. There are thrice the amount of nerve endings per square inch here,” He motioned with the toy around the Seraph’s erectile tissue, stimulating it further and exciting it all over again, “than in your genitalia. Seriously, next time you go down on it, be GENTLE, yeah? You’re gonna notice a difference. You will be lucky if it lets you out of bed.”
“So, hang on,” Ezekiel said, “Then I’m right. It’s an adjunct to external stimulation. Get fucked, you two!”
“No, you’re actually the most wrong of the three of you.” Azazel explained, pressing it past the entrance and back into its g spot again, practically bringing it to tears. “It is actually meant to be used in a series. The vibration is initially for external stimulation and preparation, then you can do some g spot work…” He began doing something similar to what Toby was, just a little bit slower and softer, very akin to picking a lock. He continued for a few seconds until Aethriel got close, announcing this with a pleading tone, “THEN you do what Isaiah did…” He pushed it all the way back and bumped against the ring of muscle leading to the oviduct, and Aethriel came a sixth time, vibrator buzzing inside it as it cried out. “And then, you turn the settings up…” He turned up the vibration and continued his movements, with the same general tone to his voice as if he was teaching these guys how to use a printer. “And you just go wild with it. Basically anything you do now is going to make it cum. If you get it close to cumming from external stimulation first, then shallow penetration, and THEN let it finish once with deep penetration… The other two areas are still ready to go, the refractory period goes out the window, and you can keep chaining orgasms until it passes out or starts begging for you to stop, as long as you remember to keep the device moving and stimulate everything, keeping it on the edge. Amateurs, all of you. I can’t believe Arseni entrusted this tech to you imbeciles.”
“Well, keep going, then!” Toby said, hand firmly down his pants. “And describe what you’re doing to it better than that, I can’t fucking see.”
Azazel abided by Toby’s request, doing a very good job of showing off what he’d been up to in Heaven in his heyday. He described his motions pretty damn well to the humans, for Toby’s pleasure and Isaiah’s knowledge. The angel underneath the demon could scarcely comprehend the magnitude of what it was experiencing right now. It felt, for lack of better terms, BLURRY down there, like generalized, undifferentiated pleasure, like that was all that area of its body could feel or be used for.
“There we go, that’s 16,” Azazel cooed, moving the toy yet again to buzz against its g spot, letting its depths rest for a second while Ezekiel lapped gently at its clit with his practiced tongue. “Just a few more, look at you, little thing, you’re a mess... See, the trick is to let one part rest while you edge one of the others and pleasure the third. Ezekiel, you better stop before it cums.”
“I know,” He said, pulling himself up and denying the angel a clitoral orgasm while Azazel pushed it over the edge with the toy yet again. The angel cried out and writhed underneath him, completely at the mercy of these humans and this demon.
“17… nice…” Toby said, switching places with Ezekiel. Isaiah held Aethriel in his lap, playing with its feathers and its wings while all this played out…
By the time Aethriel tapped out, it had cum a total of 27 times (with 22 of those times being in the final eight minutes of Azazel at the wheel) and was barely coherent even to the Demon Lord when it was finally too overstimulated for any of this to feel good.
“I-I… I … Ohhhh… I really,,,” It tried to say, “I really n-need a nap…”
“Great. You’re welcome. I’m leaving. C’mon, Ezekiel, you still want new jewelry, yeah?”
“Noooo…” Aethriel said, “Please stay… come on… big cuddle pile…”
“I don’t really DO that.” Azazel said. “I fuck hard and I fuck off. Ezekiel. Straight to Hell. C’mon. We’re on a time crunch.”
“Sorry guys, I gotta see my piercer.” He apologised. “It was fun making you cum so hard you couldn’t speak, Aethriel. Bye…” They left the room, closing the door behind them.
“I got nothing else to do,” Toby said, “I wanna stay and cuddle.”
“As do I,” Isaiah promised the slightly distressed looking and very tired Seraph in his lap. “C’mon, let’s get you all cleaned up, get new sheets on the bed and then we’ll take a break…”

Ezekiel’s appointment in hell was EXTREMELY underwhelming. He was completely shocked to learn that Azazel really just wanted to change out his jewelry. There was no groping, no excess touching, no kisses, Azazel didn’t even get naked at ALL! He just showed Ezekiel how to change out the jewelry in his triangle piercing, took an excessive amount of pictures on his phone, and then told him that was it.
“Are you serious?” Ezekiel asked. “That’s IT? You don’t want anything else, y’know, I’m willing to PAY for all this. Hell, I’m willing to DONATE.”
“Cool it, human.” Azazel said, placing his hands on his shoulders, “Look, believe me, I… I wanna be paid just as much as the next guy. We just… um… y’know, we gotta wait until after Christmas. Consider this like you writing a check, yeah? I’ll, uh, I’ll cash it when the banks open.”
“WHY?!” Ezekiel said, still naked on the piercing table, sitting up. “Did I do something wrong? I’m right here, I’m naked, I’m begging you to cum inside me, I’m more than willing to let you use the spikes! What more can I possibly offer?” He asked.
“It ain’t the offer that’s the problem, boything, you’re very tempting… I just… I just can’t right now.” He said. Ezekiel looked SO pissed off.
“That… that’s fine. It’s just so weird. I miss this ONE stupid meeting, and suddenly nobody wants to fuck anymore. Baraqiel is the only one who’ll give me the time of fuckin’ DAY, he still lets me give a blowjob or two, but, like, he won’t even touch my chest! And I KNOW it isn’t because of your sigil jewelry, because I went to a store on Earth and stole a different pair of gold rings to wear… NOTHING. All he did was take a picture.”
“Wait, you’re givin’ HIM head?!” Azazel asked.
“Well, yeah! He asks me to! He’ll text me and we’ll go and fuck around in my car or whatever, he’ll give me twenty bucks, it’s a great time.”
“Okay… first of all, he should be paying you more than twenty bucks for a blowjob.” The demon said, “If I were you I wouldn’t accept that deal. Second of all, he’s not supposed to be doing that.”
“Getting head?!” Ezekiel said.
“NO, fucking you!” The demon said, frustratedly. “He’s fucking it all up…”
“Fucking WHAT up!?” Ezekiel said.
“Nothing, don’t worry about it, boything…” The demon said, opening his phone and sending a few texts.

Baraqiel

A>> Little birdie told me you’re getting head from that guy we are very specifically not supposed to fuck.

B>> Im not fucking him, I’m getting head. It doesn’t even feel good for him, what’s the issue?

A>> The ISSUE is he’s supposed to be CELIBATE.

B>> Oh come on, blowjobs dont count man. And can you blame me? (Image: The bottom half of Ezekiel’s face, mouth open, cum splattered across his lips, tongue, and chest. It looks like it was taken in the back of Ezekiel’s van.)

“Well I AM worrying about it! What’s so wrong with blowjobs?”
“...Nothing.” Azazel said, looking at his lips a little too intently.

B>> I dunno about u but the contract I signed said “do not provide sexual pleasure for Ezekiel, and additionally, make it as difficult as possible for him to achieve it.” I stole like ALL of his dildos and took back his vibrator, I think I'm doing more than u are. I deserve head.

“What do you mean, NOTHING?” Ezekiel said. “Look, you want a blowjob, I'll give you a blowjob, I'll give you the best fucking blowjob of your life! I'll swallow, I'll spit, I'll do whatever! You've got a fucking GORGEOUS foreskin and I can’t fucking TAKE it anymore, Azazel, I wanna taste underneath that thing so fucking bad, I have been thinking about that since I saw it.”
“...I really shouldn't…” He said.

B>> Are you with him right now?!

“I still don't understand why not!!!” Ezekiel said. “Like, if you guys just unanimously decided at that meeting that I'm dirt under your hooves, or whatever, that's fine, I'm not foreign to the concept of rejection, I've seen a mirror before. But I just don't understand, I mean, if you want to fuck me LATER, why not just fuck me NOW?”

B>> HA, loser, you totally are and he totally snitched, who's the cuck now?

“...Get on your knees.” The demon said, pointing to the floor. “Down. Right now. Down, boything.” Ezekiel shut up and stopped complaining, getting on the ground immediately, probably bruising his knees in the process. Azazel realized the human was a little too short to be at dick height, so he sat down in his rolling chair and moved the height of the chair down a decent amount to align better with the human’s short stature. “Mouth open. Tongue out. There you go, you know what to do, yeah?”
“Mhm.” He said, nodding his head and obeying the instructions. He’d barely even gotten his mouth open yet before Azazel’s fingers were in it, playing with his tongue and holding his chin in place like he was inspecting the human’s mouth for quality, or something. He closed his mouth around the fingers, gently sucking on them, swirling his tongue around them, and otherwise teasing the demon lord.
“Ohh, you know not what you do, boything…” The demon said, undoing his clothing and revealing his cock. “You better be just as good with a real cock in your mouth, I want to see stars.”
“I-I’ll try,” Ezekiel said, opening his mouth again and allowing the demon to rest his cock on the human’s tongue. He closed his lips around it, gently suckling just the head before repositioning himself slightly to get a better angle and taking it almost down to the barbs in one quick motion, getting it DEEP in his throat. His hands closed around what he couldn’t take, playing with the barbs and rubbing the areas around them as if he KNEW what he was doing. Azazel definitely hadn’t been the one to teach him… fuck, it must have been Arseni, that piece of shit…
“Oh, fuck…” The demon said, softly, “Don’t gag yourself, yeah? I don’t want you throwing up on me.” Ezekiel pulled off of his cock just to respond to that stupid request.
“I’m a professional,” He said, sticking out his tongue and holding the demon still as he teased his tongue underneath his foreskin. He made direct eye contact with Azazel as he did this, making a full rotation around the head and softly moaning in pleasure before taking him down to the barbs all over again. Azazel could feel himself bump against the human’s throat and airway and felt as if he had really been missing out. Baraqiel has been taking this all for himself all these weeks?! What the hell?! He’s pretty fucking good at this! Feeling as if he could probably take a bit more, now, Azazel held the back of the human’s head and began to take over in the pace department, starting out by gently thrusting and quickly escalating to just fucking his face.
To the demon’s surprise, he just… he just took it. He relaxed his throat, held his hands behind his back and took it like a pro, no coughing, no gagging, no biting, no teeth, he didn’t even flinch.
“Look at me.” Azazel said, still fucking his mouth, “Look up at me, look me in the eyes, boything. There you go,” He said, as Ezekiel obeyed, looking up and locking eyes with the demon. “You’re… you’re gonna listen to me, right now. You’re gonna take every drop. Every… fuck, every fucking drop, you’re gonna swallow for me, yeah? You’re gonna make this worth it for me, you’re gonna swallow for me, you’re gonna stay down, you’re gonna keep swallowing until I’m ALL done. You understand?”
“Mhm!!!” He hummed and kind of nodded his head around the much larger man’s cock, doing some fucked up shit with his tongue on the underside of his cock that drove the demon wild.
“Fuck-! There you go, THERE you go-! Take it…!” He held the human’s head down, not that he really needed to. Ezekiel would have been all the way down whether Azazel was touching him or not. He eagerly swallowed around the demon’s cock as he came, swallowing practically right on cue with the pulses of cum that would have otherwise choked him or filled his mouth. And he STAYED down, just as requested, until the demon was completely done. He came up for air only when Azazel was pushing him off of his cock on the verge of overstimulation, floored at that display of skill he just experienced.
“Thank you,” Ezekiel managed to say as soon as he caught his breath. He moved his head down again to lap at the tip of the demon’s cock again, licking up the very last of the cum and swirling his tongue one more time underneath his foreskin, eyes half lidded. “Fuck, thank you so much… you taste phenomenal… I’m… I’m really honored…”
“Okay, that’s a little much.” The demon said, pushing him away a bit. Ezekiel pulled his head up and off of the larger man, worried that he’d crossed a line. “You don’t need to act like that. You gave me an… admittedly pretty fucking nice blowjob, but, this isn’t your coronation.”
“Sorry.” He said, “It’s… it’s just. It’s been a while. I’m grateful.” He said, hoping that was an acceptable alternative. “You um… you ever need some stress relief… I’m a text message away, don’t forget it. Won’t cost you a thing. And um. I… I apologise, for being so… eager. Next time, I promise, I’ll make it REAL good, fuck, if you got the patience for it I’d love to make you cum just from fucking with your foreskin…”
“No problem, I guess?” Azazel said. “I really didn’t… do… anything...”
“You came in my mouth AND you showed me how to take care of my piercings.”
“The cumming in your mouth was more of… you paying me.” He said, a little concerned about Ezekiel’s ideas about sex and money.
“...Right.” He said, standing up. “Well! Um, I’ll, uh… I’ll be on my way. Thank you again!” He said, “Please, don’t forget about what I said. You ever want a blowjob, more than a blowjob, wanna put those barbs in someone, I dunno, text me, call me, whatever. My ringer’s on.”
“...I… will.” He said, still a little shocked about the raw skill he just displayed back there. He watched as Ezekiel put his clothes back on. He could see that Ezekiel looked kind of sad, but was doing a decent job of hiding it. “Hey… you uh… you need anything from me?”
“No.” He said, struggling to pull up his skinny jeans that were a little too tight.
“You uh… you sure?”
“Yep.” He buttoned them. Azazel sighed.
“You want a hug?”
“...Is this a test?” He asked, not really sure how to respond to that.
“Test of what?!”
“You told me earlier, you like to fuck hard and fuck off, no cuddling and shit. I am not about to fuck up my chances of getting to do THAT again by saying yes to a hug.” He commented.
“No- Ugh. Look, do you want a hug or not? I’m only asking this one more time.” He said, frustrated, putting his loincloth back into the position it had been pre-blowjob.
“...Do I WANT a hug? Yes. Do I EXPECT a hug, am I ASKING for a hug, fuck no.” He answered. “I just need you to help me get back to Earth is all.”
“Come here.” He said, dryly. Ezekiel obeyed, coming closer. The demon grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him into a hug. Ezekiel held him back, trying not to allow tears to fall. “You did good.”

Chapter Text

“What is wrong with you today?” Metabelle asked Tahir as he sat dejectedly in the debriefing room outside the court. He almost always wanted to be OUT of there as fast as possible every single session, but this time, he’d stayed behind, something about finishing paperwork… he did have his court documents for the next day spread out on the table, but, he had no pen, no inkwell, and there were no notes on the page like he usually took. “You look tired. Why not go back to your rooms?”

“Room, not rooms,” He corrected, “and, my roommate is likely asleep in our only bed right now. There would be no point.” Metabelle fought the urge to respond to that with an offer of her bed. She only refrained out of fear of Arseni’s wrath.

“Oh.” She said, “I… I guess I expected that you were staying at Arseni’s place now. Does it not share its bed?” Tahir put his forehead down on the desk, shoulders softly heaving as he tried not to cry too audibly.

“Just… just leave me alone!” He said. “You do not have to rub it in!”

“Rub WHAT in?” She asked, confused.

“I… I thought it would have told you…?” He said. “Myself and Arseni… ugh… it is not… Its Grace no longer wishes to speak with me…” Metabelle perked wayyy up at that.

“Oh, you poor thing, that is terrible!” She said, pulling up a chair and sitting next to the Virtue. “Now, I understand we have not gotten off on the best foot, but, I do truly sympathize with you here. Losing your first Cherub… that can be hard.”

“Y-yeah. It was.” He said, tears streaming down his face. “I… I slept so well in its arms… I really took that for granted. It would hold me so close every night we were together and keep me so comfortable and warm… I miss it terribly…”

“Well, you will just have to find a new Cherub, then, hmm?” Metabelle suggested. “A pretty little thing like you, it shouldn’t be too hard.”

“Yeah, well, it is very hard!” Tahir said back, “Everyone knows me from the Council, so no Cherub is brave enough to accept my advances except the ones who have close ties to Arseni. But all of Arseni’s rivals are assholes, and its friends are all weird!” Tahir complained, wiping his eyes on his sleeve.

“Assholes how? Weird how?” Metabelle probed for more information.

“W-well, Iraa… Iraa is so unaffectionate. He was more than willing to eat me out until I was crying, but, he just… as soon as it was all done, he was like, ‘okay, get out.’” Tahir complained. “And Jaasiel has… some kind of problem, I do not know. But he is REALLY into… um…” Tahir sighed. “Look, I do not want to get into it. It was kind of fun, but I only did it because I was desperate! I cannot believe I am telling YOU any of this, but… fuck…. I guess I have no one else to… tell.” The tears fell much more readily now. He felt so alone.

“It sounds like you are struggling to find a nice, normal, calm experience with someone who will gently dominate you and treat you like the gorgeous little doll you are.” Metabelle replied, scooting her chair closer to him.

“I… I guess so… not sure you needed to say it like that…” He said. “You would not happen to know anyone who would do that, for me, would you?”

“If you are willing to give her another shot.” Metabelle said. Tahir stared daggers up at her.

“Not you, Metabelle.” He said. “You count as one of the assholes, and Arseni would be so upset with me if it ever found out…”

“It isn’t going to find out.” She said, “And even if it did, who cares? You just told me it does not even speak to you anymore. What do you have to lose?”

“My dignity.” He replied. “I value my place on the Council and I do not want to be seen as a toy to be played with at my job that I worked hard to get.”

“I said I was sorry!!” She replied, “I truly am sorry. I… I tend to get a little… overenthusiastic, is all. I saw you and all I could think about was how nicely you would fit in my arms, how nice you would feel to pick up and hold… you really are so adorable, you know that?” Tahir looked away, and she continued, having the feeling that she got him. “Arseni only tops, right? How would you like it if I took you back to my rooms tonight, we had some wine, we get under my nice warm blankets, and I hold you close and cuddle with you and pet your hair while you try topping for a change? I bet you’ve never even gotten the opportunity to get your cock wet before with that selfish asshole.”

“...I… um…” That sounded really, really good, actually, and she was kind of right. Arseni only ever touched his dick to tease him. “Y-you mean like…”

“I mean a whole night of gentle treatment. I will be so nice to you. I mean, picture it, I’ll be laying back against some pillows, propped up, my legs spread open just for you… I’ll let you rest on top of me while you lose yourself, I’ll whisper gentle encouragement to you and help you get where you need to be. And, I am nothing like Iraa, you will be safe in my arms all night long. It will be the works: back rubs, cuddling, kisses, slow and gentle, you won't have to be in charge of anything, I will tell you exactly what you need to do… Plus my sheets are WAY nicer than Arseni’s.” She could tell he was blushing something terrible. She smiled down at him, daring to reach over and turn his head towards her. Oh yeah, he was blushing alright.

“I-I…” He trailed off.

“Hmm?”

“...I need… a moment to decide.” He finally said.

“I know you do.” She responded knowingly. She could tell that his thoughts were impure just by looking at him, not really needing to read them to be able to tell. She was not stupid. Even before she knew he was fucking Arseni, she had SEEN him staring at her chest. “Listen, you know where my rooms are. I do not need to explain that to you. After you are done with all of… this…” she motioned to the documents, “Come see me.”

+++

There was a small knock at Metabelle’s door, right on time. She got up and answered it excitedly, knowing exactly who it was without needing to check: Tahir stood nervously at the door, holding his clipboard with his case files attached to it and not much else. Metabelle noticed that he'd done his hair, braiding a few flowers into it in two braids on the sides of his head, connecting at the back, preventing his hair from getting in his eyes.

“Ah, Tahir! Funny seeing you here,” she joked, “Come in, come in…” He entered the room, head low. Metabelle’s rooms were at least kind of similar to Arseni’s, with the high ceilings and the curtains and the pillars, but she had not made nearly as many modifications as it had. The curtains were still red, the furniture was much more sparse, there was no minifridge, no bong on the table, none of that.

“I like your decorations…” He said, sounding pretty tired and a little nervous.

“Oh, you haven't seen my DECORATIONS. This is how I keep my rooms when I want them to pass inspection, it looks much nicer when I dress it up a little for special occasions…” She said.

“Yeah…” he looked around a little more, awkwardly standing in the middle of the room with his arms crossed. “Look… um… I feel so weird about being here, you know?” Tahir said. “I… I really miss Arseni. I'm not entirely sure what possessed me to come here today, but… can we maybe… move this along?” He managed to say. “I am… not feeling well… and I really, really want to just…” He sighed, looking down at the floor. “I have been thinking a lot about what you said… about me really needing, um… to be… gently dominated and treated like the little doll I am.” He confessed, unable to make eye contact due to the embarrassment.

“You poor thing,” Metabelle commented, seeing how sleepy and frustrated he looked. “You must need it so bad… I am glad you came to see me, you are in the right place. How about I show you to my bedchambers?”

“That would be… nice…” He said, trying not to seem like he was looking at her body as closely as he was. She definitely had bigger tits than Arseni’s little A cups, not double D’s or anything (probably closer to a C, which is still a pretty impressive rack for a Cherub,) but they were big enough to show through her clothing. Metabelle was not one for asking permission to read thoughts, and she was delighted to hear a lot of Oh, I hope she lets me touch them from the smaller angel while he tried not to look at her chest. She was even more delighted when that thought was followed up with Arseni is so flat chested in comparison…

“I am so excited to play with my little doll.” She told him, getting closer and bending down closer to his level. She was so much taller than him that she essentially had to kneel down on the floor, being noticeably taller than Arseni. “You will not have to worry about anything at all, you can just let that little mind go blank. I am going to make you feel all better…”

“I fail to see how you could make me… all better… or how you could make my mind go blank. But I am intrigued by your insistence.” He managed to say. Metabelle giggled at him a bit, before reaching up and undoing the ties of her clothing, pulling down the front of her dress and slowly revealing her chest to him. Tahir almost dropped his clipboard, and had half a mind to hold it a bit lower as manna rushed downwards.

“Easily. See? Your mind just went entirely blank. Reading your thoughts right now is like looking in the mirror while shirtless.” She commented.

“Y-you are reading my thoughts right now?!” Tahir exclaimed, becoming a little upset.

“Well, I wanted to know what you think of them,” She motioned to her two sets of breasts, “and I anticipated you probably weren't going to tell me outright. You're so nervous, just relax!” She said, reaching out to place her hands on his shoulders. “Go ahead, I know you want to touch them.”

“....” Tahir was completely silent, but Metabelle could hear him loud and clear.

“Go ahead. Don’t be shy, little doll.” He nervously set down his clipboard on the table and approached his weird, annoying coworker.

They look so soft… He thought, looking at them with his hands still in fists at his sides. She is never going to let me hear the end of this… oh, how I want to taste them…

“Aw, is my doll too nervous? That is okay, I can put them away-” She said, loving the look of panic that flashed across his face.

“N-no!! Um!!! I am not nervous!!!” He insisted, reaching out and touching her, cupping one of her breasts in his hands and softly squeezing it. What started off as awkward, nervous touching quickly turned into being unable to take his hands away. He was mesmerized by how heavy they were when he tried to lift them. He couldn't take his eyes off them, and fuck, just like Arseni she had FOUR of them… It took all his willpower not to put his face between them.

He squished them and pressed them together with curiosity, watching as they came together to form a channel… he tried hard not to, but his mind went back immediately to that conversation he'd had with Arseni about titjobs. It had tried to explain to him how it really wanted to try that after it had watched some humans do it in a video once, but that it had never met a Virtue with big enough tits, and even if it had, it was just so much bigger than them, there was no way. Tahir really didn't understand the appeal. No, wait. Tahir didn’t understand the appeal AT THE TIME. Now he was not so sure.

“Umm… Metabelle…” He asked, stepping just a bit closer.

“Yes?”

“C-could I… um… Could I maybe… oh… Could I…” He struggled to get the words out of his mouth.

“Could you…?” She knew full well what he was going to ask for, just wanting to hear him say it out loud.

“Could I please, um, put my mouth… um…. On…your…on your breasts?” He managed to spit out, looking away from her many eyes in embarrassment. The Cherub took his hands off of her for a moment, holding his wrists like he couldn’t be trusted.

“I don’t know. Are you going to be a good boy for me?” She asked.

“Um!!!” He faltered. Metabelle took a long, slow, deliberate look down, making it very known she could see how hard he was under his clothes. “I… I don’t know?! What does that mean in this context?!” He asked,

“Are you going to surrender to me? Are you going to give in and let me play with my doll?” She clarified. “Are you going to do what I say?”

“Um… y-yes, I will try to… within reason…” He said, not really sure where she was going with this.

“Are you going to use my title and be polite?” She asked.

“Your… title?” He asked. “OH! Oh, I am so sorry, Your Grace…” He was well aware of how Cherubim were about that, sometimes. She giggled at him again, tussling his hair and fucking it up a little bit.

“No, no… I do like hearing you say that, but… I don’t know… you DID just ask to suck my tits.” She said, very bluntly. “I think you are going to have to be a VERY good boy for Mommy if you want that privilege.”

Tahir was immediately VERY conflicted. On one hand he was so embarrassed by all of this that he wanted to disappear into the floor. On the other hand, boobs in mouth (maybe). And he kind of hated how much he was leaning towards doing pretty much anything for boobs in mouth. In his defense, this was the first time Tahir had ever touched a boob, and he’d been around for a good three hundred years or so. He had been pretty excited (albeit very intimidated and far too nervous to DO anything about it, mostly he just showed up and enjoyed whatever Arseni did to him) when he learned that Arseni had boobs. He’d had… thoughts… about this before. Thoughts he had spent centuries attempting to suppress.

“Mommy…?” He repeated, looking up at her. “Really?”

“Don’t give me that,” She chastised, still holding his wrists. “That does not sound like the answer of a good little doll who wants tits in his mouth.”

“I just-! You said it would be NORMAL!” He argued, “You promised me gentle treatment and back rubs, you didn’t tell me I was going to have to call you… that!”

“Well, I can just put these away then, if you aren’t interested.” She began to put her dress back on, getting as far as covering up her bottom pair of breasts before Tahir actually grabbed the front of her dress to stop her from covering the other two.

“Wait!!! Wait wait wait, um, hold on! I mean, I… I could… if you REALLY want me to…” He backtracked. “Um… I can… do it.” He was mostly just embarrassed, not really OPPOSED to the idea. Metabelle knew this, too, about him. He was not nearly as good at suppressing his horny thoughts as he used to be, and even if he wasn’t, the Cherub could SEE his cock softly twitch under his clothing when she’d said those things to him.

“No.” She said. “I don’t think you’re ready to be a good boy for me tonight at all, actually, and I think you should go home and think about what you’re missing out on.”

“Are… are you serious?” He asked. She pried his fingers off the front of her dress and covered her chest back up. He bit his lip to suppress what would have been a very needy whine.

“I am entirely serious.”

“Will you at least rub my back?” He asked, really trying to save this.

“No!” She said again.

“Please, Mommy?” He asked, looking up at her again with wet eyes. He looked exhausted, and like he was going to cry. She tried hard not to reveal that this is what she wanted as she looked down at him with a critical glare, taking her damn time to make it look like she was thinking this over. “Um… my back has… problems, baseline. The stress I have been under recently…with Arseni, and the council meetings, and all… it has not helped.” He confessed.

“Hmm… I think you need to ask me more nicely.” She said, standing up. “I am listening…”

“...Mommy, will you please rub my back…” He said, not looking at her. She did not respond, and Tahir could tell she was probably still glaring at him. “And can we please, please go cuddle in your bed… forget about the thing I said about your breasts, I… it was stupid of me to ask and I apologise.”

“That is much better.” She said, getting down to his level once more, preparing to lift him up. “See what you can get if you just ask nicely and be a polite little doll? Here, let me pick you up. I am going to get you all cozy in bed with me.” She lifted the smaller angel off the ground and carried him to her bedroom. Again, it was similar to Arseni’s, except way less cool looking. Her bookshelves had no dildos or vibrators on them, only books. Her bed wasn’t a nice big oval like Arseni’s, it was a square that was fitted close to the wall, and it seemed as if she had extended it by pushing a second mattress up against the original one to make it wider. Her sheets, though, did look a lot nicer than Arseni’s. They were a deep purple color and looked like Tahir could get lost in them. He struggled in her grasp, trying to get himself out of her arms and into bed. She refused to let him go just yet.

“Ah ah, no clothes in my bed.” She said to him. “That is a rule. No clothes in my bed, not even for me. If you want to get in you will have to be naked.”

“O-oh. Um… Okay.” He said, scrambling to get down and take off his clothes. He watched as the Cherub undressed as well, revealing her surprisingly built body. It was really just her tits that looked soft, everything else was muscle. She looked almost like an Olympic wrestler, for my human viewers out there who would know what that body type looks like. He stood there, naked and hard, watching her undress, feeling very small as he realized just now how much bigger than him she really was. Arseni was pretty tall compared to him, but Metabelle was TALL tall… average for a Cherub, but she towered over Arseni. I am almost glad she is only interested in cuddling, He thought, She would not even be able to feel me, probably… oh, that would be SO embarrassing, she would humiliate me!

“There we are,” She said, turning around. Her fur was more of a golden brown color rather than a rust red like Arseni’s, and it covered similar areas of her body, ending at the very lowest part of her hips and entirely enveloping her sex. He couldn’t even really see her pussy past the fur, and tried hard not to look (and failed) even in these circumstances. The problem was, he was quickly finding that he was VERY attracted to ALL of her. There was very few places he could really look without it making his erection worse, which he already did not necessarily want her to see, in fear of being further humiliated. “Why are you covering yourself? I already know you are hard, there is nothing to hide.” He looked away again nervously as she kicked their clothing to the side. “Take your hands away, I want to see my doll on display for me.”

“Sorry, mommy…” He said, removing his hands and holding them behind his back. He again could not bring himself to look at her. Metabelle sighed, bending down to pick him up again.

“You are just too afraid of everything,” She said, sitting down in bed with the Virtue in her lap. “You are such a pretty little doll for Mommy, it is adorable how easy it is to get you aroused. And here I thought you were such a prude… To think, you were probably fighting this in every council meeting, being that close to me-” She reached a hand down and toyed with his cock for a second, wrapping her much larger hand around it, completely and totally enveloping it with a good amount of room to spare. She gently moved her hand up and down his shaft the best she could with their size difference. “How many times did you sit in your room and touch yourself like this, closing your lustful eyes and pretending it was me, pretending THIS was happening?”

“I-I never did that!!” He argued, “I-I have only masturbated like three or four times in my entire life, a-and most of those times I was thinking about Arseni-”

“Shhhh, shut up, don't talk about it right now! You know what, if you're going to talk about that lazy piece of shit, I'm not going to touch you like that.” She let go of his cock, leaving him twitching and leaking precum.

“ Will you at least rub my back???” He asked, with increasing desperation. She looked down at him disapprovingly. “...Mommy?” He corrected himself. She sighed.

“Even though you are ungrateful and disloyal… I suppose I did make you a promise.” She said.

“Ohh…” He moaned softly as Metabelle got into bed properly with him, swinging his and her own legs up, manipulating his smaller form into a position where he was lying on top of her, using her breasts as a pillow. She covered him up with the soft blankets, and, keeping her promise, began to rub his back. He absolutely melted into her touch and embrace embarrassingly quickly.
She started very slowly, simply tracing her fingertips over his flesh, and squeezing his shoulders gently on occasion. She gave the very bases of his wings some special attention, as she’d seen him flex those incessantly during longer meetings in the past. “Fffuck….”

“I am not hearing a thank you.” She chided.

“T-thank you…” He said, lost in all of this. He felt bad that he was still hard, but, Metablle didn’t care and at this point neither did he. This just felt good. Being a Virtue, he belonged to a class of angels with a very human appearance. The anatomy of his back was not well suited for wings, and they were pretty heavy, which caused a decent amount of stress on them that culminated in back pain. He really envied the way that Powers had backs that were actually MEANT for wings and could support that kind of thing, or god forbid, Seraphim whose body plan revolved around the support of their wings.

“Who are you thanking? Say it again.” She said, slowing and threatening to stop her movements.

“M-mommy. Thank you… mommy.” He corrected himself. He kind of hated how easy it was getting to say that with every passing incidence. I really hope this is not how I find out I have a FUCKING mommy kink, he thought, I may be a sinner but at LEAST I am vanilla!!

“Does it feel good when I do this for you?” She asked, making a mental note to tease him about this later.

“Yes, Mommy… it feels really good…” He said. His face being this close to her tits was NOT helping!!! He felt so warm and comfortable, the massage was making his back feel much better than it had before, and his dick was pressed right up against her belly. He was not TRYING to grind on her… but… his control was slowly slipping.

“Is there anything ELSE that you think would taste- I mean, feel, really good right now?” She asked, not so subtly spreading her legs and using an astral set of hands to push her bottom row of tits together. Normally, Tahir would not have done this, asking again, especially after the first time he’d asked this of her, but… her tits were IN his face. He wanted them in his mouth now, please, and he was very tired.

“...Can I please, um…” He he started, almost unable to get through his sentence. “May I please… try… umm.” He paused again. “...Mommy, can you please let me put my mouth… on you?”

“Oh, you want a kiss?” She asked, knowing that wasn’t what he was asking for. “Of course! Come here…” She pulled him up in bed and brought him closer to her faces for a kiss. He sat almost on top of her chest to do this, and she made sure to do it in a way that would have his cock line up with her cleavage, putting him in a position where it would just be SO easy to press her tits together and push between them… if only she would give permission. He wore an adorable expression of desperation on his face as she gently pulled him down for a kiss, pressing her soft lips to his and really dragging out this one singular kiss as long as she could. Eventually he pushed her away.

“How was that?”

“You did not let me finish!!” He said, “That is not!!! Ugh…” he still struggled to ask for what he wanted, taking a deep breath. “C-can I please put my mouth on your breasts, Mommy?” He finally managed to ask in one complete sentence.

“Hmm? What part of them?” She brought her hands down to toy with her chest just to tease him.

“Your… nipples…” She gave him a look. “Mommy, please, they… they look so good…”

“They do, hmm?” She continued, toying with one of them.

“Y-yeah, they… fuck, I have not been able to take my eyes off them…”

“I noticed.” She said, amused. “Come here, little doll. I think you deserve a treat. Would you rather suck on them, or would you rather have me hold them together so you can slip your adorable little erection between them?” A flash of arousal hit him hard in the chest.

“Um!!! I!!! I get to choose!?”

“You get to choose ONE.” She clarified.

How could I CHOOSE?!!! He thought, Oh, oh no… fuck… I want her tits in my mouth so badly but, oh, it would be fucking DIVINE to paint her chest… FUCK, what am I THINKING!?? This is SO wrong!

“Tahir? Baby? You gonna choose?” She said, after a few seconds of silence. She shifted him downwards off of her so that he could make a choice while seeing more of her body. He swallowed.

“U-um!! Yes!!! Um, please, Mommy, please let me put them in my mouth.” He decided, choosing comfort over getting off.

“Good choice. Here, let me sit up a bit.” She said, propping herself up a little on some pillows and spreading her legs. “If you do a good job for Mommy, I might even let you slip inside of here…” She reached down and spread the lips of her pussy to show it to him. Technically speaking, this was a cloaca, but, it looked a lot like a pussy to Tahir. Her clit was pretty evident between her folds, and had one row of tiny, sandpapery barbs around the base of it. She was dripping wet, and oh, if Tahir had known this was an option, he would have asked to suck her clit instead... He was quickly learning he had a thing for giving head to Cherubim. “Oh, I see that THAT has gotten your attention. Don’t be shy, my doll, go ahead, you can touch.” He didn’t hesitate this time, replacing her hand with his much smaller one and exploring her sex. The wetness that immediately got on his hands felt very different than what he’d experienced with genital fluids before this, not that he exactly had a lot of experience with that. But in his defense this was pretty non-standard; it almost felt like a non-newtonian fluid. He tried to stretch his fingers apart quickly and it hardened and snapped before dripping down into the palm of his hands.

He traced around the folds of her labia and around the entrance to her cloaca. He tried his best to play with her clit, only managing to make her giggle at him, amused by his inexperience. Feeling a little embarrassed, he tried to up the ante by putting some fingers into her.
The inside felt soft, but like, padded, soft, rather than SOFT soft. It felt like there were harder structures like bone underneath there, like the hard palate in a human’s mouth. His cock twitched and he gasped as he felt her squeeze her muscles around his three fingers, realizing just how much control she had down there… Metabelle gave him a very fake disapproving look and grabbed his arm, making him take his fingers out.

“Not yet.” She chastised. “It must feel nice, though… I know you are really desperate to fuck me, but, I already told you, you have to be a good boy for Mommy before you get to feel good.”

“I-I wanna be a good boy for you, Mommy,” He said, at this point too turned on to be embarrassed. She smiled down at him.

“Come here, then. Mommy is gonna give you what you want. Here.” She opened her arms, and Tahir climbed into them. She positioned one of her tits close ish to his face. “Go ahead.”

Nervously, he opened his mouth and placed it around her nipple, tasting it with his tongue. She moved a hand to his hair, gently undoing his tight braids and carding her fingers through it teasingly as his tired eyes fluttered shut, and he lost his ability to control himself. He softly sucked at her nipple, losing himself in the softness of it all. She was holding him so gently. Her fingers felt so good massaging his scalp, her soft breasts felt amazing in his mouth and in his hands. He would never admit it, but he kind of LIKED that she was deliberately ignoring his cock, which was left hard and untouched between his legs as he fell deeper into subspace. She reached over with her other hand to keep rubbing his back, and he felt like he might actually cum just from this…

“Good boy, oh, you are doing so well… Your tongue feels so good.” Metabelle praised, allowing him to bring his hands up and play with her bottom set of tits while his mouth worked the top two. “You are really turning me on. Almost makes me want some stimulation a little… lower.” His eyes went wide and he broke the suction to look up at her more directly.

“Please!!!” He said, thinking about her clit in his mouth, maybe even her letting him put his dick inside her, and struggling not to drool even more than he already was. “Please, Mommy, I, I will do my best for you, I'll make you feel good!!”

“I didn't say stop.” She instructed, gently pressing his face back down to her breast, one of the bottom ones this time. He took her nipple in his mouth and resumed the gentle suction, embarrassed. “Here, let me help you.” She spread her legs a bit wider.

“S-should I…?” He asked her, struggling to ask a complete question out of shame. “What do you want me to do?”

“I WANT you to continue being a good boy for me and using your mouth like you were.” She said, again pressing his head back down. “And if your cock just happens to find its way inside me… I would not be mad about that either.”

“No, I mean… do you have um, condoms, or…?” He asked, nervously. She actually laughed at that.

“Tahir, you think YOU could get me pregnant? There is no way. You aren't even going to be able to reach past my plates.” She explained. “Besides. You are going to pull out, right?”

“Pull out?” Tahir asked.

“Yeah. Like… when you feel like you’re about to cum, you take your dick out of me.” She explained.

“No, I- I’m a top of my class graduate from the Chastity program, I know what pulling out is!” He said. “I just… um… I’ve never… penetrated… ANYONE before… and pulling out doesn’t really WORK. Like, it pretty much NEVER works-”

“How is that relevant here?” She said.

“I just!!! I!!! I need some GUIDANCE!” He said. “Please tell me what to do. I do not like making… decisions, sexually. I want them made for me, I want you to...” He couldn’t believe he was saying this. “I want to be a little doll for you, in bed! I want you to call the shots!”

“Okay, okay, baby, I didn’t think that was going to overwhelm you so much.” Metabelle said. “Maybe you aren’t READY for pussy…”

“No, I’m ready!!!” He argued back. Metabelle deliberately, slowly looked down, making him VERY aware that she was aware his cock was practically resting just outside her entrance. It was actually harder just from a body positioning standpoint for him to NOT push himself inside her than to slip in.

“Hmmm… I don’t know… it seems like you’re pretty confused about it…”

“Please Mommy, please… come on, I, I am right there…!” He pleaded.

“Well… I suppose I can allow it… As long as you keep your mouth busy for me.” She said. “Don’t worry, I will tell you what to do. Go ahead and get your mouth back to work, and I’ll help you put your cock where it belongs…” He re-attached himself to her tits (the bottom right one this time) and she used an astral hand to guide his cock directly into her cloaca. He almost cried at the feeling of slipping inside of her, thinking at first that she might be half correct about him not being ready for pussy. He was glad she was still holding him up, toying with his hair and rubbing his back, because if she hadn’t been, he wouldn’t have been able to hold himself up.
“Do your best to move those hips, little doll. Don’t stop. And DON’T cum.” She was so warm, and so wet, and he really didn’t have any experience with this kind of thing at all. Due to their size difference, his dick wasn’t even big enough to stretch her out; honestly, his dick was barely even touching the top and sides of her cloaca at the same time. It felt like her using one, maybe two fingers on herself. But she couldn’t deny that it was nice.

“O-ohhh, FUCK!!!” He moaned, unable to focus enough to set a coherent pace, moving his hips how he felt he needed to, face pressed between her bottom set of tits. “M-mommy!!!”

“There you are, oh, you are too cute…” She praised, listening to the plap plap plap of his hips contacting hers on every thrust. He was FAR gone at this point, panting and moaning and grabbing with his hands and oh, the back rubs felt so good, and fuck, he was close ALREADY, and-

“‘Mgonnacum!!!” He told her, like two minutes in.

“Already?” Metabelle teased. To Tahir’s horror, she locked her legs behind his back, pushing him back inside her right as he was coming to his senses and trying to pull out, so as not to give in to his pathetically desperate need to give a creampie. “Hmm… I don’t think so. You can keep going.”

“I-I!!! I can’t!!!” He said, trying hard to stay still and just NOT move his hips, which was the only thing keeping him from cumming right there and then. He was right on the edge and it was VERY hard to keep his hips still.

“Yes you can!” She encouraged, knowing that he could not in fact keep going without cumming. “You feel so good, I don’t want you to pull out just yet. I’m sure you can keep going, I’m sure you can hold back…”

“If I move I am going to cum!” He told her. “I-I’m sorry! I!! I told you I have never done this before, and you just feel so good-!” He said. She pressed him closer and gently squeezed her muscles around him. “Aah!”

“Don’t you WANT to cum inside me?” She asked, tilting his chin up. “Wouldn’t it just feel SO good to disobey, feel SO good to spill all of that in my nice warm cunt?”

“I-I… I mean… yes? Of course it would!!” He said. “B-but, I can’t,, I can’t stop it if I keep moving and, you said-”

“I don’t care.” She said, grabbing his chin. “Keep. Moving. What happens, happens. Just TRY not to cum, TRY and be good for Mommy...” He kept moving, as slowly as he could make himself, but, even that was too much for him. He tried to obey her orders, he really did, but, Metabelle was NOT going to let him pull out, and she was reacting so positively to his thrusting!!! He didn’t even know what his orders were anymore!

His fragile mind and his hips were helpless but to give in to her, to move faster, chasing his desperately needed release, no longer caring what happened, trying so hard to hold back like she said... She held his face to her chest, kept her hands moving on his back, and held his hips firmly in place as close to hers as she could get them as he was tipped over the edge, with no choice but to spill inside her. It was one of the best orgasms he’d ever had, face buried in her tits, absolutely mortified. It was a big one, too, he absolutely painted her insides. He could practically feel his balls emptying entirely, all while unable (and, if he was being honest, unwilling) to pull out even a centimeter.

“FFffuck, ohhhh,,, Mommyyyy…” He moaned against her chest, unable to stop, unable to make eye contact, feeling so many things at once right now… She gently pet his hair through his orgasm, letting him really soak in the embarrassment.

“All done?” She asked, when his moans turned to soft crying.

“I-I am so sorry,” He apologised, not even listening to her question, “Fuck, I am so stupid, I should have pulled out!!! What do we do now?! You are going to get pregnant, I can’t be a parent!”

“I’m not going to get pregnant, Tahir.” She said. “I’m on birth control, like everyone else is.”

“WHAT?! WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY THAT EARLIER!!!” He said, tears streaming down his cheeks in relief and also frustration.

“I… I thought it would be hot to watch you REALLY struggle not to cum inside me even though it was inevitable.” She confessed. “It was. You were so adorable, struggling like that! You were trying so hard to hold back and you still only lasted two or three minutes!”

“I.. I tried so hard…”

“I know you did… here, it’s okay, Mommy’s got you…” She held him closer, allowing his cock to slip out of her and laying down so that they were now just cuddling in bed. He felt so held. He felt so fucking SATISFIED. His adrenaline was still rushing from that THING Metabelle just did, and, oh, fuck, he really LIKED IT, didn’t he…

“Are you angry with me…?” He asked, finally, after a long silence.

“Not for cumming inside me, no.” She responded. “That was a very fun game.”

“I mean… ohhh… fuck… you could not be more correct…” Tahir replied. “T-that was good. It was so good, oh, fuck, the way you just… completely, totally made me think… think that I was being made to disobey… I could do nothing but be at your mercy, you were so in control…”

“I am a very good listener.” She said, winking at him.

“Are we going to do this… again…?” He asked.

“I think so.” She said. “Next time I am going to set a timer, and if you cum before it is done, I will bend you over my lap and spank you for each second that is left on it.”

“...Um…” Tahir said, hiding his face in his hands. “M-maybe, um… maybe you could spank me right now, too…?”

Chapter Text

“Hello?”

“Isabella!! Hey!!! HEY, DAD!! ISABELLA PICKED UP!!” Isaiah sighed and hovered his thumb over the hang up button. Then he thought better of it.

“It's Isaiah, Diane. Please… please don't do this.”

“Yeah whatever! DAD!!!”

“Just give the phone to Dad.” Isaiah said. “I don't wanna talk to you.”

“Just because YOU'RE mentally ill doesn't mean I have to feed into your fantasy world.” Diane responded, and there was some shuffling around to be heard in the background.

“Hey Dad.” Isaiah said, when he was pretty sure Diane had handed it over.

“Hey… kiddo.” Came the tired voice on the other end of the line. “You coming home for Christmas this year?”

“Uh…” Isaiah sighed. “I'm… I can't.”

“Come on, Isabella, you can't keep doing this.” He said. “Just because you chose your path doesn't mean you can't come and see your fucking family, it's fuckin’ Christmas...”

“Were you even going to listen to my explanation as to why I can't come?” He said. “On top of not fucking wanting to, I can't come because I wouldn't even be able to get into your stupid fucking house. Did you know I almost died recently? I was in the shock trauma center, I got helicoptered out of your brother’s place. I have all these burn wounds and I lost a leg, Dad. I'm in a wheelchair now. I have, I have a shit ton of medical problems, Dad, and when the hospital called you, you didn't even pick up.”

“Are you being serious?”

“Yeah, I'm fucking serious. I will fax you my medical records, if you want me to. So no. I can't fucking come to Christmas this year to get called Isabella and watch you punch Uncle Rick in the chest so hard you break his ribs. I can't come and watch you and Pam yell at each other about who's at fault for what in your shitty fucking marriage.”

“Like YOU’D know how to have a fuckin’ marriage!” Isaiah’s Dad said. “You have NO idea how hard it is! We're a REAL family, we got REAL issues!! Life isn’t a fucking fairy tale!”

“And if you were a BETTER family maybe you'd know I'm married now, too! Yeah? I am! And it's fucking amazing!”

“I can't even have this conversation with you, Bells! Pretending to be a man wasn't enough, was it?! You had to go and marry some poor fuckin’ girl? She's never gonna have kids! Women aren’t supposed to marry women for a GODDAMN reason, you're ruining her goddamn life! Oh, don't tell me it's an official thing!”

“YEAH! IT FUCKIN’ IS! WE GOT THE PAPERS AND EVERYTHING! GO FUCK YOURSELF! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!” Isaiah hung up and threw his phone across the room, putting his head in his hands. There was a knock at the door.

“Are you alright, Isaiah?” Aethriel said from behind the door.

“Uh… yeah.” He said.

“Can I come in?”

“Yeah.” The door opened. Aethriel stood there in its human form, with its blanket wrapped around its shoulders and nothing else in except a little pink bralette that Isaiah had gifted it recently, seeing that it really did enjoy clothes. It held a bottle of wine and two glasses in its hands.

“We, um… we opened up one of the cases of wine, just to try it, downstairs.” It said. “I figured you would want some too.”

“That would be awesome.” He said, allowing the angel to pour him some and hand him the glass.

“Who… was that, on the phone?” It asked.

“My sister, and my Dad.” He answered honestly. “They uh… they do this every year. They call me and try and guilt trip me into coming back to fuckin’ Utah for Christmas and I never fucking do it. Because it sucks there. And because they don't see me as a man.”

“I will be honest with you.” Aethriel said. “I was listening to the entire conversation outside the door.”

“Yeah, I figured.” Isaiah said.

“Do you really consider me to be your wife?” It asked, emotions unreadable.

“I… I mean…” He said. He could feel the subtle pull of Aethriel searching his thoughts, the temptation just too great for it to overcome. They looked at each other.

“I still just do not know.” It said. “I am sorry. I truly am.”

“I'm not the one asking.” He said. “Can't it just be simple? We could just-”

“I do not want to ‘just.’” It said. “I understand your thought process. I do not agree with it but I understand. And you do not need to protect me. In fact you are only taking from the time we have by-”

“Can we please not do this right now?” He said. “I'm really just exhausted.”

+++

“Sarah?!” His mother said over the phone. “Are you safe? How did you… where are you right now?!”

“Hey mom.” He said. “Um… I mean. The cops can probably trace this, so… I can’t really say too much.”

“No, sweetheart... you'd never be blamed, I mean, you do know it wasn't your fault, right? The man was sick in the head! He chose the easy way out, you know just as well as I do you didn't pull that trigger, you couldn't have! You couldn't even see to aim!”

“Yeah… uh… tell it to the judge.” He said. “Look… I… I just wanted to call, y’know?? See how you were?”

“We’re all worried sick looking for YOU, Sarah!” His mother said over the phone. “The police told us you were likely dead! They’re searching MORGUES, sweet pea!”

“Real shit? Oh, well, perfect! You can rest assured my ass is never getting caught.”
“Please, please come home.” The voice on the other end of the line sounded less and less familiar.

“Bye Mom.”

“No! Please don’t hang u-”

He hung up.

+++

Bro

Ethan> hey man

Ezekiel> what

Eth> U alive? Still doing okay? Need anything?

Ezk> im fine

Eth> Still living out of ur car?

Ezk> no found a place

Eth> Oh hey congrats!!! Where ru working now

Ezk> still suckin dik lol

Eth> I am more than willing to help hook u up with a better gig dude.

Ezk> nah

Eth> I mean… ur call man. I can’t force u, but, u know I know u can do better than this

Ezk> im happy, ethan.

Eth> But you’re nowhere. u got NO security. Ur just relying on my ass to bail u out.

Eth> Well im not bailing u out this time. Unless u show me ur gonna change. Fucking try this time, go back to school.

Ezk> I hit it big this time bro

Ezk> ur not gonna believe it if I told u. U are not gonna have to bail me out again.

Ezk> i got this big dog client right, get this he’s a DEMON. From HELL. and he pays the BIG bucks dude i probably make more than u do just giving head in my car

Eth> Dude u don’t have to do this

Ezk> demons are so fucking HOT dude u don’t understand

Eth> goodnight.

Ezk> im actually telling u the truth

Eth> Im really not in the mood for this. I keep trying to help u and u just act like life is a fucking joke, or metaphor, or something, its TERRIBLE and you’re gonna DIE. I fucking love you and it hurts me to watch u get worse like this.

Ezk> Are you happy?

Eth> We aren’t doing this right now. You aren’t making some epic point. You need HELP, Zeke, and I wish you would just see that.

Chapter Text

This chapter has a VERY SMALL PLAYLIST!!! Here is just a sampling of the kind of thing several thousand newly fallen angels were listening to at this party, as well as some humans pre-fall… These are not in chronological order but I think you will probably be able to figure out where some of these songs are supposed to go. Yes this is very short. No it is not complete. I’m sorry.

STICK AROUND TO THE END FOR ARTWORK. I did my best, I have never been a 2d artist and I still am not now. I apologise in advance for making you look at it. Also PLEASE if you CAN'T access the images, leave a comment!!! I need to know so I can fix it!

Like a Prayer: Madonna
Everybody : Backstreet boys
two : bbno$
We Like To Party : Vengaboys
Where Them Girls At : David Guetta
STARSTRUKK: 3OH3
Party Till We Die : MAKJ & Timmy Trumpet
We Like Shots : LMFAO & Lil Jon & Vengaboys mashup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ckMFeoVNfU
Move Shake Drop: Flo Rida and Pitbull REMIX https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Os7YSvWzK4c
High Voltage: Tommee Profitt
Courtesy Call: Thousand Foot Krutch
Shots Will Roll - Heads Will Roll (A-Trak Remix) X Shots (bwebs Mashup)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWGW_ozry3I&list=PLfnIhaD6qQBG7e_u0OLDepkXIJHrYFXr2&index=11

Scream: Usher
Boom Boom Boom : Vengaboys

Pretty Rave Girl
Every Time We Touch: Casdcada
Mr. Saxobeat
Pound the Alarm : Nicki Minaj
You Spin Me Round
Sexyback
Fake ID
First Let Me Take A Selfie

Along with whatever your favorite rave/edm music happens to be. It is CANNON that Arseni's music taste is bad, it's basically just any song that makes it horny or mentions something that might have wings...

Everything was ready. Or at least, Arseni desperately hoped it was. It had spent the last entire month doing the bare minimum work it possibly could in Heaven, almost entirely sober, while coordinating the most intense Christmas party it ever had, EVER, in its entire existence. Each year it really did try to outdo itself, and it had mostly succeeded. But this time, it had felt immense pressure to make this GOOD. It had promised Azazel that it would make it perfect. Without flaw. Everything… it had to be. Because if it fucked up this time, if Iraa outshone it… it would probably die in Hell. Which was not exactly how it wanted to go. It had pictured more of a, accidentally taking too much crystal, or, falling to its death, type demise. Trial in Hell was at the bottom of the list. Especially with all the dirt Azazel had on it.
Besides… Tahir was pretty much the ONLY angel it knew other than Raphael that it didn’t invite, and it wanted him to feel left out. It had even invited Sebl, and, shit, it had even invited Metabelle.
“Are you ready?” Edon asked, hovering beside it outside the door. They’d just got done making out sloppy style on the couch; Edon had claimed it was to calm its nerves, but Arseni knew full well it was because the Throne was getting attached. That, and, its oral fixation had been neglected for a few weeks, which was making the poor Throne REALLY desperate for a tongue in its mouth, or some fingers, or SOMETHING. As much as it hated to admit it, Edon knew Arseni was a good lay, and Arseni was starting to realize how fucking KINKY Ophanim tended to be. It had really been missing out. This past month, Arseni and Edon had been fucking RELIGIOUSLY. There was hardly a night they didn’t do something incredibly lustful together anymore. They’d even gotten Ezekiel in on it on the phone. He’d made them promise to do something in person with him when they finally got down to Earth. Edon had replied with something along the lines of, ‘I am so desperate to penetrate someone again, this asshole doesn't bottom, I am sorry Ezekiel but make sure you are READY for my return.’
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Here’s to our last night in this hellhole we call Heaven,” Edon said, holding up its glass of wine. They clinked their glasses together and downed them, before Arseni reached forwards and opened the door.
“Tahir?!” It exclaimed, shocked to see him. It could have been certain this was going to be their first actual guest, who Arseni speculated would likely be Jaasiel looking for more crack. “I told you NOT to show your face here again!”
“You do not understand!” He said, looking panicked. “Metabelle is blackmailing me! I made a mistake, I fucked up, I don’t know, I, we hooked up… She is going to out me to the Council, I just know it!!”
“...What do you mean, you hooked up? Get the fuck out of here.” Arseni said. “Far from here. Seriously. I… can no longer protect you, but, I assure you… spend the night in your room, keep your head down, and she will never bother you again.”
“...What?”
“I can explain no further. I… I am very busy.” It explained.
“You are going to leave me out here?! Alone?! To be hurt?!” He said, incredulously.
“You have NO idea what I’m doing for you,” Arseni said. “Now get out. I will take care of Metabelle tonight. I am serious. Stay far from here, and you will be safe.” It explained. Edon was still behind the door, and unbeknownst to Tahir, it was being physically held back from going over there to fight the Virtue by way of Arseni holding its wheels in place. “I… I cannot help you any more than I already am.”
“You are JUST as bad as Raphael!” He exclaimed, tears in his eyes. “You know what?! I will just go to him!” He exclaimed, turning to leave.
“Do NOT do that!! You will regret it!!” Arseni yelled after him, but, the Virtue wasn’t listening. He just stormed off. Arseni shut the door and sighed.
“Come on, you won’t even let me beat him up a LITTLE bit?! It’s my last night in Heaven!!” Edon complained. “I may never get another chance!”
“Oh, he will fall eventually.” Arseni promised. “If he is really going to disobey me directly and get involved with Archangels… he will fall. Mark my words.” There was another knock on the door. When they opened it this time, it actually was Jaasiel.
Arseni’s rooms were decked out in party decorations, streamers and tinsel and holly leaf accents, baubles and ornaments and all kinds of pretty things. Azazel had gifted the Cherub a makeup set, which it had been over the moon about. It spent hours coming up with a look for itself. What it settled on, of course, was gaudy as hell and had a lot of glitter.
It had taken an immense effort to transport the amount of alcohol necessary for a party of this size, mostly achieved through the use of some extremely difficult to maintain portals. The energy level necessary to conceal a portal to Hell in Heaven required thirty demons together and had taken over a day to plan. But now, all the alcohol was stacked along the walls, in kegs, in barrels, in casks, all with taps. There were glass cups stacked at the doorway from floor to ceiling.
Arseni had set out metal rolling trays stacked with joints (those had taken FOREVER to roll, Edon had spent twelve hours on it the day before, alongside Sebl, another angel it wanted so badly to throttle. It had resisted only because the alternative was spending twenty four hours doing nothing but rolling joints. And that was WITH Arseni’s rolling machine.)
Jaasiel could hardly believe his eyes. He'd been sober for weeks, and half his harem were far too afraid to have sex now that they were off the elixr. This place was like an oasis.
The couches were pushed to the sides of the room. There were a few chairs surrounding a few tables. Arseni wanted to maximize standing room for this event. As angels who had been here before began to file in, many of them were a bit shocked at the sheer amount of booze Arseni had on hand, and many looked too relieved to be confused.
“Where did you GET all this?!” Lana asked, downing her fourth glass of wine. “Everyone else has absolutely nothing! Even Iraa is down to maybe a bottle or two!”
“Oh, I have my connections,” Arseni winked at her. Then its smile dropped, as it realized that this meant… “Wait!!! Have you and Fria been fucking Iraa??”
“...No?”
“Oh you TOTALLY are!” It shot back, “Go fuck yourselves, both of you! I am officially done with your shit, you are never there for me! You are only in it for the wine!”
“At least Iraa can eat pussy!” Lana retorted.
“Do not even GO there…”
Edon watched from afar and eyed the joints on the table. Its job right now was to monitor the population of this party and monitor the gossip, alerting Arseni when it learned of a larger number of new attendees who would be arriving, or if it thought another room would need to be opened up. The Cherub nextdoor was very ready to open up its rooms in exchange for a good quantity of alcohol, set to be delivered ten minutes before the rooms opened so that this Cherub could have its pick of the good shit, or whatever. So far, there were about 100 angels here. It may be time soon… but God, Edon just wanted to smoke right now. It was a little distracted by that. It was also thinking about what Ezekiel was up to. They'd had a talk on the phone last night about their mutual frustration about the jobs they'd been given, and the expectation of sobriety up until the point that everyone was pretty sure this was going to go as planned.
Ezekiel was handing out LSD at the door to humans who wanted some. He hadn't ever done LSD, but fuck, he wanted to. He was also very anxiously awaiting Edon’s return: aside from the occasional stress relief blowjob he’d graciously been allowed to perform, he'd for whatever reason been entirely unable to get anyone to fuck him in weeks now. With the amount of planning and activity it took to get this party off the ground in such a short period of time, everyone was either too busy or too tired to have sex, especially knowing how high intensity sex with Ezekiel tended to be. He caught himself getting REALLY jealous when everyone just seemed TOTALLY fine with allowing Aethriel and Isaiah to give their tasks to him and Toby to deal with for a few days when Aethriel had its heat, even though Baraqiel was dealing with the same shit at the same time and HE didn't get to just have someone else do his shit for him, and on top of that he was horny as fuck and sent Ezekiel like, two or three nudes an hour for 3 days straight which wasn’t exactly HELPFUL.
Getting to experience the godlike fingering skill that Toby had was ALMOST worth the extra work, though. He'd used some corny line about how “guitarists finger faster” or something, and he'd been more than right about that. Toby was GOOD at pleasing pussy. But as good as he was… he was no angel. It was also weird how Isaiah had taken Toby aside after that to have a “talk” with him, and how he seemed so eager to finger him again but had still refused the next time he asked…
Ezekiel was starting to think there must be some conspiracy against him or something at this point. He was used to having a LOT of sex, and being cut off like this was not easy. He thought about how things must be going up there in heaven.
From Arseni’s perspective this was generally speaking a typical Christmas party so far, maybe with a little less sex than usual due to the crackdowns on sexual activity getting more intense, everyone being so relieved to have access to alcohol, and Metabelle being here.
Angels were getting drunk, talking with their friends, dancing, and enjoying the music (Arseni had a sound system that it DEFINITELY wasn't supposed to have. Unfortunately the best it could do for a while was Christian Rock, recordings of Seraph songs, and orchestral stuff that it had gotten from the Morality Review Panel who judged whether or not certain music was sinful. It was kind of lame.) Arseni was VERY excited to be given the go ahead to start the new playlist that it had finally been able to create; through the booze portal, Ezekiel had insisted they give Arseni and Edon their own cell phones complete with access to the internet. Unfortunately, the signal is absolutely SHIT in heaven, and they were only able to access very limited services like text, call, and email, and it was all on a crazy slow delay. Toby had helped them download the music they'd wanted to the phones and talked them through how to set that up with the archaic sound system Arseni had. It was waiting until the vibe was right to switch it over, where it was also planning to turn all the lights off and show off the colored lights it had been able to set up.
“Lana is inviting her Academy friends.” Edon came up to Arseni and informed it. “Jaasiel is sending his messenger to run down to the Power Barracks and invite a good deal of them. I already invited everyone I thought would not immediately report us from the Ophanim shelves, and Persimmon told me she is inviting the wheelwork. I really hope the wheelwork shows up… I think there will be a few Seraphim arriving too, if the rumors going around are correct. We should open the next room.”
“I agree. Everyone seems pretty… excited about the booze.” It commented, noticing that almost every angel here was at least tipsy. “I think we should turn the music on.”
“Can we wait for the Seraphim to show up? I think they would be freaked out if we start playing that one with the screaming right as they come in.” It countered.
“You're probably right… but I want to play SOMETHING fun. Maybe I will start it now, and start with something a little tame?” It said. Edon seemed to agree, so it put on the first song on the ‘kind of chill' part of the playlist. A few angels looked around confused, some of them having never heard secular music before, some of them experiencing shock that they knew this song. It could tell how longingly Edon was looking at the alcohol, watching everyone else slowly get trashed. “Oh, come here, you poor thing, do you want some more wine?”
“...yes…” Edon admitted. “But I cannot get too drunk…”
“I'm going to spit it into your mouth.” Arseni taunted, so nonchalantly that Edon almost choked.
“Um!!!” It responded, feeling heat rise in its body. “H-here? In front of… everyone? That is like kissing!”
“I do not see why not,” Arseni said, “Nobody is overtly groping anyone else yet, I've only seen a bit of light petting and kisses with tongue. We need to get this started! Show these angels what this party is about!”
“...If you are sure they will not be angry…”
“Oh, I am very sure.” Arseni said, using an astral hand to hold its glass of wine and picking Edon up. “HEY EVERYONE!!! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!” It shouted into the microphone of the cell phone. Toby had helped it set up this feature with the speaker system, and Arseni had been very excited to use it. It poured the entire glass of wine into its mouth, waited for heads to turn, and then pressed that mouth to one of Edon’s. “Don't spill a drop,” It said with another head as it spit the wine directly into Edon’s mouth, quickly overfilling it and causing rivulets of wine to spill down its wheels. Edon tried its best to swallow it all, but it had really not been ready! At first its flame flared up in annoyance with Arseni’s impatience with it, but as it opened its eyes and saw how many angels were standing there, stock still and STARING at them both, some with jealousy evident on their faces, the annoyance quickly became a shock of arousal.
Arseni kept its mouth on Edon’s even after it finished swallowing what it could of the wine, shoving its tongue in its mouth and making out with it in an overtly horny way. A few guests looked nervous, but, more of them cheered the two on. They made out for a solid 45 seconds like that before Arseni released its Throne, dizzy and half hard, to the floor. Its dick poked helplessly out of its sheath maybe a fourth of the way, and it almost collapsed to the floor. It was definitely going to ask for another one of those later. It managed only to respond to that gesture with a soft whining sound, horny enough right now to start humping the larger angel’s leg if it had asked.
“You all ready to get FUCKED UP?!” The Cherub shouted into the microphone again.
“Arseni!” Metabelle exclaimed, “You…? And EDON…?”
“Jealous?” Arseni replied, as most other angels weighed whether or not they wanted to get fucked up, and a few gasped as they watched Metabelle show her faces at this party, much less get THAT close to Arseni after their last fight... “I'M NOT HEARING YOU! I SAID WHO'S READY TO GET FUCKED UP?”
There was a cheer from the crowd, especially as they saw Metabelle not actually doing anything about the sexual activity happening so openly. A few pairs and trios of angels looked at each other with heavily repressed want, resolves breaking.
Arseni saw its front door open and six very nervous looking Seraphim enter, along with twelve or fourteen Powers complete with their armour still on. It was time.
“I never thought YOU… and a THRONE… Especially THAT Throne! Edon is… Edon is EDON! What do you even see in it?! Have you lost your mind?” Metabelle seemed genuinely upset by all this. “You're making me look bad, elevating my disgraced former Throne to that level!”
“Edon is a horny mess. I love it when an angel is a horny mess,” It explained, hitting some buttons on its phone, including sending a text to its neighbour that it needed to open its rooms in 10. “When are you going to learn that I do whatever I want and I don't care what the consequences for YOU are? Besides, you should really consider having better taste. Just because an angel is pretty doesn’t mean they are high quality. I have seen the Dominions you fuck. Edon is high quality.” The lighting in the room went from ‘high class Christmas party' to ‘rave at a bathhouse’ in an instant, and the next song started playing, this one more overtly party music rather than just being secular. There was a bit of nervousness at first, but… it didn't stop the dancing. It didn't stop angels from giving up on trying to act like they weren't desperate to get drunk again, running back and forth and back and forth from the kegs, it slowly melted away as Arseni yelled out “IT'S OKAY TO FUCK HERE, GUYS, THIS IS AN ARSENI SIGNATURE CHRISTMAS PARTY, CLOTHES ARE OPTIONAL, YOU FUCKING PRUDES!” over the speakers. “FUCK THE COUNCIL!”
“I thought you were strictly Cherub 4 Virtue now.” Metabelle said. “I thought that was your THING. You're only doing this to piss off Tahir and I, you're doing this to disgrace me!”
“I'm into it for a lot of reasons. And stay the fuck away from Tahir, you hear me?” It said. “You put a finger on him and you lose a hand.”
“I will do no such thing!” She replied. “Besides, he told ME that you were not speaking to him anymore.”
“And I'm telling YOU that any Cherub that encroaches on MY territory is gonna answer to MY closed fist.” It said.
“Well clearly you don't give a shit if he sits pretty in my lap and sucks my tits for me in my much nicer bed, and cums his little heart out deep inside my-” She began to brag, as Arseni put its phone away in its pocket, took out its earrings and handed them to Edon, wound up and punched her in her lion’s jaw. She actually stumbled for a few steps before righting herself with fire in her eyes. Edon’s eyes went wide and it stepped back. Everyone stepped back, not dialing back the debauchery but giving the two Cherubim a wide berth. It was like maybe an hour and a half into this party.
“Say that again?” Arseni demanded, “What did you do to him?”
“I fucked your Virtue, and I brought your shitty pervert Throne to justice with him, too.” She said simply, “And I did it WELL.” She blocked its next punch, catching its arm and twisting.
“I know this is overdone,” Arseni said, “but I'm going to tear your fucking THROATS out!”
There was loud cheering from the crowd as the fight got real. Arseni grabbed her by her hair and twisted and tore, dragging her to the ground. She bit and kicked and knocked Arseni's legs out from under it, bringing it down with her. They grappled on the floor in a flurry of teeth and beaks and fists for a while, and it looked like Metabelle was coming out on top. Edon screamed at them to stop fighting, but it may have been the only angel there that didn't know the futility of trying to get two Cherubim off each other in a harem dispute.
Metabelle successfully tore out a good deal of secondary feathers out of one of Arseni’s wings and drew manna with her talons, slashing at the flesh over its chest and necks, narrowly missing its vital vessels. Arseni grabbed and twisted her arm to try and stop her from trying that again, caught its teeth around one of the ears of her lion head, and tore it clean off, spitting it out on the floor.
“My fucking EAR!!!!” She screamed, “WHAT THE FUCK, ARSENI!!!! I HAVE TO SIT ON THE COUNCIL PUBLICLY TOMORROW!!!”
“I HOPE THEY FELL YOU!” It shouted, holding her down as best it could and trying not to get torn to shreds by her beak while it threw punches. Much to Edon’s surprise, the crowd was LOVING this. It really didn't know what to do now. It put Arseni’s earrings in a pocket on the shiny green handmade bag Ezekiel had sent it through the portal, pulled out its phone, and did the only thing it really could do.
“Azazel!!!” It said, shocked the demon even picked up, “How do I stop two Cherubim from killing each other!!!”
“What? What the fuck is going on?” Azazel responded, not thrilled that this call had come in at this time. He had two human women with him, one on each thigh, with a human man sitting between his legs looking up with pleading eyes, excitedly waiting for the command to go down on him.
“Arseni started a stupid fight and now it and Metabelle are beating the shit out of each other!”
“Uh… is the crowd into it?” He asked, nodding at the human between his legs to signal that he could start now.
“Yes! They are just making it worse, they're cheering them on!!” Azazel could hear chants of ‘AR-SEN-I!’ and ‘MET-A-BELLE!’ in the background, and ‘FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!’
“Well then what the hell are you calling me for?! Start taking bets, yeah? Tell me how it turns out when you get here!” He hung up, sighing.
“Who was that?” Asked the woman on his right thigh. Azazel undid the button on her jean shorts to get a better look at her pentagram womb tattoo, which was partially obstructed by her light purple panties. He pulled those down a bit too, allowing her dick to spring up and thwap against her lower abdomen, leaving a little drop of precum on the tattoo.
“Oh, uh… don't even worry about it, sweetheart. I'm an event organiser, my bouncer just called me about a fight…”
“Can you invite her?” She said. “I kind of want to fuck a bouncer.”
“...Sorry, did I say event organizer? I meant ‘m like, the HEAD bouncer…”
Isaiah rolled his eyes from his station in front of the goat demon, surveying the crowd from their currently shared sky box. Everything was going pretty good so far. The visual effects they were pulling off looked really good, the pyrotechnics looked amazing, and Aethriel was having a blast showing off its true form over a stadium of amazed humans under the influence of LSD who would pretty much all remember this as a weird fucking trip (or for the more sober ones, an incredibly impressive display of holograms or something.) The theme of “silent night” was going pretty well too with how fucking loud it was. There were around six thousand people here, an amazing turnout for the little stadium they had booked. Technically the capacity was around 15-20 thousand, but, they'd set up a LOT of displays and open bars and they also had to make sure they had space for all the angels that were coming soon, so, they'd sold out the show at about 8,000. It was only 8 pm.
There were shit ton of bars. Alcohol was free. There was free weed and free shrooms and LSD and free food. There were signs posted explaining that clothing was completely optional and that public sex was entirely cool here; the advertising for this event had also made this pretty clear as well. There were darkrooms set up around the stadium with various sex furniture and baskets of condoms and lube and plan B. There were stages and dance poles and dance floors and soft places to sit or lie down. The hellfire blazing across the stadium as lighting also kept it pretty comfortably warm in here despite it being cold as FUCK outside. There weren't terribly too many people fucking right now, but, the night was still very young. People were dancing and drinking and talking to each other, and having a generally good time.
For a little while now, Isaiah's job was done. He and Azazel had been left in charge of deciding when to hit the switch to open up the portal to hell, and to make sure that the demons in charge of the medical tent weren’t having too much trouble figuring out human medicine. It would be a while until that switch needed to be flipped. Isiah relaxed and tried to watch the show, tuning out Azazel’s crazy four way happening like 10 feet away, which he had been uninvited from for being too much of a rival dom.
He watched Aethriel dance in the air, changing size, flying up and diving, spinning around and flashing its silvery feathers under its wings at the crowd, in that way it always did for Isaiah when it was trying to get him to fuck. Isaiah had been so anxious about the possibility of all this going wrong that he did a double take while his brain finally processed what he was looking at. Have I not noticed that it's been doing a mating display for the past 30 minutes now? he thought to himself.OH!!! Hey Aethriel!! You look hot as fuck out there!! He thought directly at the angel, who faltered a bit in one of its dives and almost grazed the top of one of the multiple structures that had been erected for this event.

Thank you! it replied. It flared its flames and made them climb higher and higher, moving the fire from wing to wing and changing the color of it throughout the visible spectrum in a pulsing wave.

You're really having fun out there aren't you? You're essentially flashing the entire crowd and they have no idea. They just think you're pretty. He thought back.

I am not FLASHING them, I am dancing! It replied.

Okay, so what's with the sexy wing and fire stuff then? Isaiah asked.

I am dancing but I am doing it sexy… Aethriel explained. Do not even try to tell me that it is wrong, I know that humans do this too!

Angelface, I'm not saying you're doing anything wrong, Isaiah replied, I'm SAYING that it's working. When the next act goes on, I want you to come down here and land your pretty ass directly on my face.

But you are with Azazel up there in the box! It thought to him.

Azazel is having a four way right now. He's literally laying down on the couch right now with three humans, he's getting his dick sucked by some weird dude in a sweater, and there's a girl sitting on his face and he's eating her ass like the world's gonna end tomorrow while she makes out with another girl. I'm sure he won't mind. Isaiah thought. C’mon, I brought my strap and everything.

...Which strap? It asked, turning itself now so that it could flash the box Isaiah was sitting in directly, showing off the iridescent underfeathers in a wave pattern to match the oscillation of the fire. Isaiah was on zero hallucinogens right now and he was still completely dazzled by the display.

The purple one. But I also brought the big metal one Arseni gave me. Isaiah teased. That sounded pretty fucking good to Aethriel. It spun around and did a little barrel roll in the air.

Can I go down there now? It asked hopefully.

Wait for Baraqiel to switch out with you! Isaiah thought at it. No rush or anything though. I'm really enjoying watching you dance for me. If you do an especially good job and REALLY show off the goods I'll make it worth your while… He teased.

“Hey, director,” Baraqiel tapped Isaiah on the back and he turned around. “You want me to go out there yet? Or are you having too much fun jerking off or whatever?”
“What's the rush?” He asked.
“Well, mainly that I want to get out of this form,” He said, gesturing to his human body. “But also because I want to go up there and fuck the shit out of that Seraph. It keeps giving me EYES.” He complained. “It can't not know what it's doing, Aethriel is smart, it's practically begging to get bred and if I don't go up there and do something about it, ‘Aza is gonna go up there and do it himself.”
“Yeah, sure, go ahead.” Isaiah said. “I'm not even sure why you're asking me for permission, dude. Aethriel can make its own decisions.”
“Are you two not in a serious romantic relationship?” Baraquiel asked. “And here I thought I was being polite, not fucking your girl without “clarifying your relationship status” like Arteqoph is always getting on my ass about.”
“It's really complicated,” Isaiah said, “But to answer as simply as possible, no we are not, and I really don't know why everyone thinks that.”
“Because you guys sleep in the same bed, have sex all the time, kiss and say you love each other, and you call it ‘angelface’ and it pretended to be your wife when you got almost killed in that house fire I saved you from SO effectively that the hospital staff let it sign your consent forms without even IDing it?” Baraqiel asked. Isaiah looked away.
“I said it’s complicated.”
“Does that mean it’s fair game, and that I can go tell everyone after this that you aren’t going to get upset if we have sex with it?”
“Why would that make me upset?!?!” Isaiah asked again. “Even if we WERE dating, what about the person that I am makes me seem like I give a shit about monogamy?”
“Okay, okay, I’ll give you that.” Baraqiel said.
“Don’t get cum on the crowd please.” Isaiah said, “That seems fucked up in some way.”
Baraqiel transformed and flew up to meet the Seraph. In all his demonic glory, he was confusing to look at, a little on the terrifying side. He had three pairs of wings, six in total, with black and grey feathers. These wings surrounded and seemed almost to connect with his body, which was a confusing, blurry, shifting mess of limbs and tendrils that looked almost as if they were made from metal, MAYBE from stone, or maybe the outside pieces of an insect’s shell? It was very hard to tell. Isaiah thought it almost looked like what would be left over if… oh. He understood now. Like if the wheels of a Throne were cracked apart and shredded. He shifted forms and shape easily as if he had almost unlimited joints.
Connected by and to those tendrils were several thin, ovular plates with eyes in them. Isaiah counted at least seven, but there were more than that. They looked like they had been filed down into that ovular shape, and he guessed that they, too, were made from shattered wheel, just larger pieces.
Isaiah watched this in awe, especially as he turned around, shifting his body around in the air, organizing six of the plates into a sort of head. He stuck out a tongue from the shadowy blurry mess that seeped between the tendrils, and gave Isaiah what looked like a middle finger. He began to weave and organize the tendrils into larger limbs, giving itself a good four arms with uncountable fingers.
Isaiah was not turned on by this at all, just completely shocked. Aethriel, on the other hand, seemed VERY interested, and flew higher when Baraqiel approached, getting into position and doing its little dance for him. The crowd was LOVING this. Baraqiel lit up his body almost like a lightning bug, flashing patterns along his wings and tendrils in arcs of blue electricity. The message was lost on Isaiah (he could, by context clues, interpret it as morse code for ‘U want some fuck?’ like that bowerbird) but Aethriel was getting the message loud and clear. It pulled up its tail feathers and presented itself to him, allowing and encouraging Baraqiel to extend two freaky weird looking face-plates on a sort of neck structure (again made from the tendrils) and put those faces underneath it, eating out the Seraph in front of this huge ass crowd with a tongue from between the gap of the two plates, from somewhere in its shadowy insides.
“Oh my God…” Isaiah said, watching this play out in front of him. “I didn’t know THAT is what Ophanim look like after they become demons!!!”
“It isn’t. At least not always.” Azazel responded, taking his face out of his human lover’s ass for a second. “Ophanim get a wide range of crazy new morphs when they hit hellfire, and Baraqiel got UNLUCKY… poor guy got shredded to pieces…”
“Shut up!” Said the human who he’d been eating out, “You’re supposed to be eating me out! QUIT stopping to talk to your weird friend about random bible trivia! Or at least INVITE him over here!”
“Oh, yeah, right. Sorry babe.” He said, continuing his four way.
From Isaiah’s vantage point, it looked like Aethriel was really enjoying itself up until the point when electricity arced off the demon lord’s body and electrocuted the ever loving FUCK out of the Seraph, sending sparks and crackles of electricity flying in all directions. At first, Isaiah thought it must have really HURT the angel, and he was gearing up to get REALLY mad, but it was quickly made apparent to him that he had essentially just forced Aethriel to cum on his face, REALLY quickly, with next to no lead up, which was probably a shock, no pun intended. Aethriel moved back against the demon, looking for more stimulation, which Baraqiel was more than happy to provide in the form of grabbing it by the bottom set of wings, flipping itself around, and sticking his dick inside it, which folded out from the mass of limbs. Isaiah couldn’t really get a good look at it from where he was sitting. Either way, the Seraph took it like a champ.
It was almost like it was choreographed, the way they both folded their wings and dropped down, swinging around and falling together in a spiral, before pulling up at the bottom of the dive and launching back up into the air a bit. Baraqiel had Aethriel by the wings, now, all six of them, holding it tightly and not giving it an inch of room to hold itself up as the demon fucked it, much more aggressively now, holding the Seraph like a sex toy. Aethriel was giving him fuck me eyes and excitedly bouncing a flame across its wings and through and around Baraqiel’s tendrils, mixing its divine flame with the demon’s unholy shadow, or whatever substance that was. Isaiah had no idea.
The demon took extra care to spread the feathers situated around the angel’s cloaca to give the crowd a good show as he got ready to cum inside it, pausing for just a second to show the crowd his knot, not yet shoved inside the poor angel. He did a little gesture with a few of his arms, as if to say, ‘Come on, I wanna hear you SCREAM for us, up here, cheer us on!’ And they DID, screaming out and goading them into it as Baraqiel gave Aethriel what it had wanted ever since it had seen Edon accidentally knot Isaiah all those weeks ago.
“Holy fucking SHIT!!!” Isaiah said, putting his hands on the desk, unable to look away as the act concluded, Baraqiel landing on the ground with Aethriel somewhere Isaiah couldn’t see. “Is THAT why Baraqiel never shows up around us in demonic form?! Does he think we’re gonna freak out?”
“He thinks you’re going to be too scared of him to fuck him.” Azazel answered. “When he was MY Throne, we used to compete for lovers all the time, and… well, even in Heaven, Ophanim aren’t really considered to be the most ATTRACTIVE angels. When we fell, oh, he was-”
“THAT’S IT!” The woman said, struggling in Azazel’s grasp. “Are you even paying attention to me?”
“I’m paying attention to a lot of things!” Azazel replied.

+++

Arseni got Metabelle completely pinned after a good fifteen minutes of them beating the shit out of each other. This was a feat, as Metabelle stood a good half head taller than Arseni, and at least looked decently more buff than it on the surface. Edon barely managed to convince them not to actually kill each other once it was thoroughly clear who had come out on top, and had taken over and ordered Metabelle to stay AWAY from Arseni for her own good. Arseni spat manna out of its mouths and sat down angrily on the couch.
“Fucking hell man! What was that?!” Edon asked. “We’re supposed to be making this party fun! Why the fuck do you keep holding me back from fighting people just for you to fucking fight someone else on sight for no reason!”
“It was not for NO reason!” It replied. “It insulted me and you and fucked Tahir.”
“So did Isaiah and we’re basically working for him now.” Edon said. “Everyone is doing something kind of shitty here, you need to calm down!”
“You weren't saying that last night when I-”
“We are NOT going to talk about last night right now!!!” Edon exclaimed.
“I bet you're still numb and tingly down there.” It said, still sounding pissed off. Someone threw an empty wine bottle and Arseni ducked out of the way of it, just watching it shatter on the ground.
“Why are you so horny after all that?!?” The Throne asked.
“You really don't know a lot about Cherubim, do you?” It chided. “Look, you don't have to be the one to take it, but, after a fight, especially one like THAT, I need to cum in someone. The offer remains open until I find someone else. I'd prefer it to be you because I mean, I did just fight for YOUR honor over there…”
“From where I was standing it looked a lot like Tahir’s honor…” It grumbled.
“Yeah well, it was 50% yours!” Arseni argued, crossing its arms. Edon sighed in frustration, and looked around to make sure the Cherub nextdoor had actually opened up its rooms, which it had. More angels were arriving every few minutes, and it was getting crowded in here. Looking around, it could see a lot more angels dancing, kissing each other, with their clothes off or partially undone, and definitely a lot more sex was happening, albeit not a ton. Right now, everyone wanted to get drunk first, fuck later. Edon was about to give in to Arseni’s half-assed advances before it noticed Cardamom and Persimmon had arrived.
“I… I will be back. I need to talk to someone who just arrived.” It said. “And we should open up the next several rooms, things are getting… crowded. I think word of this fight will likely spread and attract attention.”
“Fine!” It said. “You’re welcome, by the way. Bring me back some beer or something…”
“Edon!” Cardamom exclaimed when she saw the Throne, giving it a kiss to say hello. “I have not seen you in a month!”
“Yes, well, you were in the throne room the whole time.” It said.
“Ugh, do not remind me. Persimmon and I have been so bored and so… so SOBER since you told us about Raphael, but, we are so glad you told us!” She said.
“Yes, there really has been a crackdown! Raphael is furious, he took us all aside and grilled us for information! Reis was the only one of us punished so far, but, he took a TERRIBLE beating and I do not know if he will fly again! He is still recovering…” Persimmon explained.
“Recovering where?!” Edon asked, confused.
“Uriel’s office, I think. I do not know for sure, but last I saw him there was manna everywhere and he had broken bones...” Persimmon commented. “I hate to do this right now but, can we PLEASE have some alcohol?! It has been way too long.”
“Yes, of course, all the alcohol is free.” Edon said, motioning to the wine casks behind them. They took turns drinking directly from the tap, while Edon watched. “Uriel’s office is in the Meeting Hall, correct?” It asked.
“Yes, it is. Oh, no, Edon, you are not thinking of GOING there to find him, are you?” Cardamom asked. “You do not want to see Uriel right now, I can tell you that. He has been livid as well since this whole thing started, but, ever since Aethriel left… he is worried that Reis will leave as well, and, I do not know if you know this, but, word around the throne room is that Aethriel defected and died on Earth recently!! Is that not crazy?! Uriel is worried that more Seraphim will follow and give the devil more practice!”
“Aethriel was definitely NOT my favorite, but, dead? That was incredibly scary to hear, I did not know demons were getting that bold!”
“...Um… yeah… dead… wow… That is… that is terrible to hear.” Edon said. “Um… no, I am not going there.”
“Good, because we have a question for you,” Persimmon stated, “Um… we were wondering if you would be interested in a three way.” She asked, poking her fingers together. “We have never had sex with other angels and… well… we had a talk about it and we both find you attractive.”
“Um… let me get back to you on that… this is not a no, I just… I am organizing this event and I am. Busy right now. Sorry.” It said, making its way back over to Arseni, who already had some random Virtue on its lap. It was playing with her pussy with one hand, and had undone the complicated laced up sleeves on her dress to grope her tits with the other. “I am going to Uriel’s office to go… um… go do something important…” It said, trying not to stare. Wow… maybe I should have just let it fuck me before talking to Cardamom… fuck, I miss those fingers in me…
“Yeah sure whatever, hey, did you get me that beer?”
“Get it yourself!” Edon retorted, leaving the party and heading off towards the Meeting Hall. There was supposed to be a Christmas service happening here right now, but, it was oddly empty. Very few angels were here, and those that were looked confused as to where the fuck everyone else was. Edon did not stop to talk with any of them as it headed towards the offices upstairs, really hoping it didn’t smell too much like wine and weed. It reached Uriel’s door and knocked on it, unsure of what else to do, mostly just worried about Reis.
Reis had been one of the only angels in Heaven Edon actually liked, much like Arseni. He’d been the one that told Edon about Arseni being short a Throne after that trial. It had expected Reis to show up at this party, and really did not want to leave without him. As the door opened, revealing Uriel, Edon realized it was actually a little bit drunk right now and also did not have any kind of excuse lined up for why it was here if this happened, and Reis did not answer the door.
“...What is your business here?” The Archangel asked, peering down at the much smaller Throne. Edon had never actually spoken to Uriel before this, and had only really seen him at a distance. It was vaguely aware that Uriel had too many wings to be all Cherub, but, it did not know that he had an extra entire two sets. It also did not know that he had THAT many eyes, the extra pair of arms, or the extra faces… He was actually kind of hard to look at, even for Edon.
“I… am here to deliver a message to Reis,” It lied, “This was… um… this was the place I was told to go… to speak with him.”
“Reis is not well.” Uriel said.
“I know. But. Um. I was told to come here and tell him that he must come now, to the throne room.”
“He cannot.” Uriel replied. “He cannot fly. Who sent you?!” He asked, opening the door slightly wider. “Where did you get that… is that a backpack?!”
“Um… God sent me…” It claimed, trying to distract from the backpack. Uriel looked shocked and opened the door all the way, allowing Edon inside the office. This office looked much different from Raphael’s. It almost looked like walking into the night sky directly, it was very calm and dark and there were endless stars. It was really hard to see the walls. All the furniture was very plain, pristine white furniture that was the only marker of clearly delineated boundaries in the room. In the corner, Uriel had put down some kind of blankets and sheets and such, where Reis lay unmoving in a pile. There was exposed bone and tendon visible on his top two wings on his left side.
“What do you mean, God sent you?!” Uriel exclaimed.
“God said Reis must come with me to the throne room right away, He wants a private audience with him.” Edon said again. Reis looked up with a look of resignation on his face. He looked ROUGH.
“… Does He know where Reis is right now? Or what his physical condition is?!” Uriel asked.
“I do not know. I am just the messenger.” Edon replied.
“Reis cannot go to the throne room.” Uriel said. “He is very injured. I fucking TOLD Raphael to be normal about something for ONCE, just let something go for ONE OCCASION and he just… he just went ballistic! I do not know why he cannot just let this go through the courts, it is just alcohol smuggling! If Reis goes to the throne room now, he will fall out of the sky.”
“Well, I am not leaving without him!” Edon said. “I was given this instruction, I must follow it, or I will face punishment.”
“Did the Lord mention me?” Uriel asked.
“No, but, ummm… Michael did…” Edon replied, picking the Archangel with the worst reputation for being hard to get ahold of to make this take as long as possible to verify.
“Michael is involved now?!”
“Loosely!!! I went to his offices first because… I know that he and Raphael do not always agree on the topic of, um, judgement… so I thought Reis may be with him. Michael told me he did not know the situation entirely, and to ask Gabriel, who then told me to check your office instead.”
“What is going on?” Reis asked. “Is my court date now? It is Christmas!”
“I have to go talk to Michael and Gabriel…” Uriel said, “DO NOT leave this office until I get back, I will be a few hours… I am going to fix this.” He explained. “DO NOT go anywhere. I am… I have no idea what could have prompted this…” The door slammed behind him as he left quickly. Edon rushed over to the pile of blankets to examine the Seraph.
“Edon… did God really send you? What is He going to do to me?!” The Seraph asked.
“Can you fly at all?” Edon asked, seeing that the wounds in the angel’s wings were fairly significant. It looked as if metal spikes or maybe knives had been driven through them and pulled out at the shoulder, and he also had quite a few marks that looked like they were from a lash or a hot iron rod, maybe.
“I… I cannot even stand.” He said, “Uriel carried me here last night. I have not been able to get up since then.”
“You have to,” Edon said, “I am going to get you out of here, tonight.”
“And go where? Edon, I am sorry, but you wasted your time. I am going to die, I will be destroyed as soon as the Lord sees me.” He said, seeming resigned to this fate.
“No, there is no audience with the Most High! I made that up!” Edon said. “I am going to take you to my Cherub’s rooms, and tonight, we will go to Earth. I defected, and so did Aethriel, and I am going to help you, too!”
“Why?” He said.
“Because fuck this place, Reis!” Edon said, trying to pull the angel to a standing position with limited success. “Because you can heal on Earth and be free from pain! Did you not listen to anything Cardamom told you that I said about Earth?”
“Cardamom did not tell me anything… word did not reach me in time. That is why I am in this position in the first place,” The Seraph said, “I went down to pick up a few casks and next thing I know, I am being dragged through the stratosphere, nailed to a wall, and beaten.”
“We do not have time for this! Please, you have to trust me, get up, use what energy you have left to fly. I know it is going to hurt but you have no choice!”
“I am going to die anyway!!” He cried. “I appreciate you attempting to return the favor… but…”
“You do not understand.” Edon said. “It is so complicated, but, just trust me when I say that it is in your best interests to get to Earth as fast as possible. You can survive this.”
“How do I know this is not a trick?” Reis said, “How do I know this is not Uriel testing me?” Edon sighed and opened its bag, which it was really starting to appreciate the utility of. It pulled out a bottle of wine.
“Would Uriel let you drink this in here?” It asked.
“...No…” Edon pulled the cork out of it with its teeth, handing the bottle to Reis.
“Go ahead.” Reis pulled itself up a little more and drank a good deal of the bottle.
“Where did you even get this from?” The Seraph asked.
“I got it from demons in Hell.” it answered, honestly. “Or potentially from the humans I am having sex with on Earth. I will be honest, I don’t know exactly where this one is from.”
“THIS one? There is more?” Reis asked.
“Tons more.” Edon said. Reis looked slightly more interested, then dejected again.
“Look at my wings, Edon! These will never work again, and it is two on the same side… I cannot even move them. I am dead. I am already dying.” It said.
“I… I know a human on Earth who has repaired Seraph wings before, maybe he could fix yours, too?” Edon suggested. Looking at the wings, it really wasn’t sure, but… it was worth a try. Edon didn’t really understand the difference between different healthcare workers. “Can I take a picture of it to show him?”
“With what!?”
“This.” Edon took out its phone, and got a picture of the worst of the injuries to the wings in question. It sent the pictures to Isaiah with absolutely no context, then put its phone on silent and put it away. “Come on! We really do not have a lot of time! Try and stand up!” It commanded. Reis sighed, and then attempted to stand, getting most of the way to its feet before requiring assistance.
“You think I am going to be able to get to Earth like this?” He joked. “Edon… this is stupid.”
“I… I am not leaving you here! You saved my life! Eye for an eye!” Edon began to cry. “I… I am going to take you to Arseni’s Christmas party…”
“You will practically have to carry me.” Reis said.
“The bed is so soft in Arseni’s room. You will love it. If you think you are going to die anyway, you might as well die in a nice, warm bed, right?!” Edon pleaded with him.
“...If it is that important to you…” He said, allowing Edon to prop him up a little more. “Please, be careful… I am not feeling well…”

By the time Edon returned, Arseni had opened up a LOT more of its neighbor’s rooms, and the music and the debauchery had reached a whole new level. One of the Cherubim whose rooms these were had supplied a DJ setup and allowed a few of the Seraphim in attendance to try their hand at beat mixing, which sounded… well… it kind of depended on the Seraph, but, Seraphim come pre-programmed with musical knowledge, excellent singing voices and a very good ear. That was where the experience ended, though, as none of these angels had ever sang anything that wasn’t praise to God. Being given the freedom to try and make something DIFFERENT ranged anything from calm-ish deep house music type beats with no lyrics, to hard and fast barely understandable screaming, to poetic love songs, to some of the nastiest descriptions of sexual fantasies Edon had ever heard set to music. Being dragged into a party to the lyrics “BLOOD CLOUDS THE EYES OF THE RIGHTEOUS / VOICES PRAISE TO DEAF EARS / BLINDED BY DIVINE LIGHT / UNFORGIVING / PUNISHMENT AND PAIN / LET ME REST/ LET ME SLEEP ” screeched in the voice of an angel who was crying and hitting buttons on a piece of equipment it was learning that it inherently knew how to use despite never seeing before was not the most reassuring thing for Reis.
Angels were coming from everywhere, and the party was getting more and more out of control. There was a flock of sheep running around somewhere. Angels were throwing up and blacking out in the hallways. They were laughing and crying and dancing and experiencing revelry like they truly never had before, and there was only one question on everyone’s minds: what now? The general consensus was that this could not end well, nor could it go on forever. Angels in charge were already starting to notice that important tasks in Heaven weren’t getting done, it was Christmas, there were supposed to be tasks getting done! Arseni had prepared for this. It had written up some pamphlets, and got Isaiah to print them and send them up through the portal. It broke them out and started placing them around the party and distributing them to others as soon as it started looking like the party was not going to go ignored, and angels were still showing up, drawn in by invitation or curiosity or temptation or simply by accident in some cases while being sent out by higher ups to go look for missing angels.
Some opted to leave the party early, worried about punishment. But the vast majority were starting to have… thoughts, about how things were in heaven. Through the debauchery, and even WITHIN the debauchery, debates were being had. Unmoderated conversations about morality and theology, not barred by the fear of the lash for an improper thought or word, were being had. Every angel in attendance had SOME sort of experience with some fuck shit that really made them wonder… are we really on the side of good? Being able to air those grievances was contributing to a mentality shift. Arseni was very pleased with itself. This was going exactly as planned.
A lot of the lower angels were REALLY upset, especially with the way they were treated by their superiors and considered to be expendable and largely worthless. Messengers felt as though they were put into a lot of situations where it was their job to LIE to desperate humans praying for healing or for help, telling them God was with them when really they knew He wasn’t going to do shit. Powers felt like they were usually given very vague descriptions of the demons they were supposed to be fighting and showed up underprepared or confused and got their asses handed to them and then ON TOP OF THAT got punished when they returned for their inevitable failures. Virtues felt like their opinions weren’t really taken seriously and that the policing of their writing and works was a bit much, as well as the fact that humanity did not really give a fuck anymore and no amount of trying to guilt trip them was going to make premarital sex any less common, plus the crackdowns on Virtue Purity were getting… excessive.
The Wheelwork Ophanim in attendance really hated carrying that heavy ass throne around all the time, after a while it really hurt, and, can’t God do anything? Why can’t he move his OWN throne? Why does there have to BE a throne!!!
Many angels were learning just how out of the loop and MESSED UP the Seraphim were, ESPECIALLY the mid-heavens Seraphim who weren’t important enough to be actually in charge of anything but were under CONSTANT surveillance in thought and action and had no idea what pretty much anything was, not even inside of heaven, because their entire existence had been spent in praise and tireless labor. All they knew was You Must Love The Lord Your God and anything else was considered sin, even any additional thing they liked, no, you can’t casually enjoy the company of another angel: that is preferring something over God, that’s a sin, you will be physically punished for that. The lower heavens Seraphim could get away with a lot more, and the upper heavens Seraphim would blame the sinful things THEY did on the middle heavens ones. Some of them didn’t know how to speak any currently used human languages. Some of them could not speak at all, no longer remembering how to speak if it was not praise, especially upper middle heavens Seraphim... These guys were getting TRASHED, and once THEY learned about another option and saw what they were missing out on, even death seemed preferable to staying in heaven.
“I need the key to your bedroom!” Edon said, weaving through the crowd and practically dragging Reis along with it, who was dripping manna from his open wounds onto the floor.
“Absolutely not!” Arseni said, “I am the only one who is fucking in that room tonight. Unless you’re taking this dick, you don’t get the key.” It said. Edon could TELL that it hadn’t abided by the very clear instructions Azazel had given them of ‘please don’t get too fucked up, you have a job to do.’ Arseni was very crossfaded.
“Arseni, he is INJURED.” Edon explained, and Reis looked away as best he could.
“Injured enough to-” Arseni got a better look at the Seraph, and gasped. “OH!!! Oh, God, okay, um, yes, here are the keys! Get that poor soul cleaned up, look in my shower cabinet, I have so much morphine in there… there are other drugs too… just… get back out here, after! I need to speak with you!”
“O-okay!!!” Edon said, taking the key. It was difficult, but the two angels made it back to the room eventually, and Edon slammed and locked the door behind it. “Finally… okay, let’s get to the shower…”
Reis allowed Edon to assist it in washing out the injury, even though it burned terribly to do so. This was done in panicked silence, as neither angel really knew what to say to one another right now. After it was washed out, Edon went to the cabinet and grabbed a big box with a symbol of a snake wrapped around a pole, which also said “DRUGS” in big letters that Edon could not read.
“What is morphine?” Reis asked, as Edon opened the case and quickly learned that it couldn’t read ANY of the labels in here. NONE of them were in archaic Latin at all. They honestly all just looked like they’d been stolen from the hospital when Arseni went there.
“It… it is a pain medication.” Edon said. It remembered Isaiah telling it about this one night when they’d been out on the porch smoking joints with Ezekiel that one time, and it remembered being annoyed with him that he wouldn’t shut up about drugs. At the time, Edon just wanted him to leave so that it could fuck Ezekiel over the porch railing in peace. But Ezekiel had seemed interested, so, it had no choice but to sit there and listen. Now that it thought about it, the interest had seemed a little fake… wait, had that been teasing? Whatever!!! It didn’t have time to think about that right now!
“What about diphenhydramine?”
“It makes you sleepy… and I guess it treats allergies, too…” Edon said, trying to figure out what any of these bottles were or did.
“What is that one?” Reis picked up a bottle.
“I can’t read!” Edon exclaimed, “Tell me what it says!!”
“It says, acetaminophen for injection.” Reis read off the label.
“Um, that one is a pain medication too. But it is not strong,” Edon said.
“This one says haloperidol.”
“Sedative.”
“Lidocaine?”
“That works for pain!” Edon said, grabbing it and breaking open the ampule, pouring it into the wounds. Reis shut its eyes and cringed at the feeling before the drug actually took effect, which did calm the angel a bit.
“Ohh… that… is much better...” He said, collapsed on the floor. “Can you… do you have beer in there? I saw casks of wine, if there is no beer I will take some Pinot noir…”
“I am NOT your bartender!” Edon said, frustratedly.
“Come on, I cannot participate in the party, you may as well get me a beer!” Edon sighed.
“....Fine. What kind of beer do you want…”
Edon’s phone buzzed in its bag and it ignored it as it went back out to the party. It wouldn't be able to read any texts he sent anyway.

ISAIAH (Profile image: An image of Isaiah asleep on the couch with a party hat on his head reading “DUMB BITCH.”)

E>> (Image: a gnarly looking pair of stab and tear wounds in two Seraph wings. No caption.)

I> What the fuck??? What's going on???

I> Who is that??? Are they okay???

I> HELLO???? WHY DID YOU SEND ME THIS?

I> (Voice message: EDON! HEY!!! what the fuck did you send me, who is that? Do I need to send someone? Please fucking respond in some way, I have no idea what you want me to do with this information!)

E>> HELP

I> ?????????? How??? How help??? I'm not even in the same dimension as you right now! Can you find Arseni???

E>> :(

I> Someone needs to teach you how to fucking READ, OH MY GOD.

I> Ostende hoc Arseni.

E>> IPSE EST EBRIUS

I> Vocate Ezekiel!!!!

E>> NON EST MEDICUS

I> NEITHER AM I!!!! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!! I'M NOT A DOCTOR! And even if I WAS a doctor, I'm a HUMAN. You need Arseni to fix this! Or Hermani, maybe! I can't do Jack shit to help you right now! Are you able to get this Seraph down to Earth??

E>> NON POSSUM LEGERE :(

I> USE TEXT TO SPEECH

I> (Voice message: EDON I AM BEGGING YOU. Use fucking text to speech!!!! We put that app on your phone for a reason, do you remember how to use it? Please tell me you remember how to use it. Or, fuck, just call me?!)

I> Hello?!?!?

Edon brought the Seraph a case of beer and a pot brownie, and helped him get into bed. It dressed the wounds with gauze wraps out of the medical kit in Arseni’s shower, and attempted to tuck him in.

“Are you good like this?” Edon asked.

“Very, very good. I can die comfortably now.” Reis said, settling down. “It does not hurt. I cannot feel it, anyway. I am so tired.”

“Okay… well… you are not going to die. I will come back and… check on you. And at the end of the night I will take you to Earth, and I will bring you to your own bedroom. Where you will have a mini fridge. And a bookshelf. And… and your own bed.” Edon promised.

“That sounds wonderful.” Reis replied. Edon assured him it would be back, and rushed out to go meet with Arseni.

“What did you need to speak with me about?” Edon asked, finally being able to speak with Arseni. The party had reached new levels: a total of 60 rooms were now open and the estimate on attendees had reached around 7,000. Evidently, attendance had increased exponentially as more Cherubim with increased networks got involved and started spreading the word.

“Ohhh, EDON!!! HEYYY!! C’mere, you!” Arseni called, beckoning Edon over to the table at which it was sitting. There were three other Cherubim sitting at this table, drinks in front of them, as they watched some other angels dance. “Turn… turn into a human. Show Jaasiel your cute little ass.”

“Is THAT what you really want me for?!”

“...I also wanted to tell you that I'm pretty sure some of the upper heavens angels have found out about the party, and are maybe going to be here soon. So. Prepare to… uh… attend the after-party. Um. I have already spread word of the afterparty, most attendees are AWARE of a large, conveniently placed party on Earth…”

“I JUST GAVE REIS A SHIT TON OF DRUGS!” Edon said, “Fuck, Arseni, how am I going to… why did you not tell me earlier!!”

“You seemed busy!!” Arseni replied. “I do not know, I have just been enjoying the festivities. You should too, you need to relax!!”

“I CAN'T RELAX BECAUSE I'M DOING YOUR JOB FOR YOU!” Edon exclaimed. Arseni made a face and grabbed the Throne, pulling it into its lap.

“Come onnn… show us your human body…” Arseni coaxed. Edon sighed and just did it, a little upset that Arseni was asking it to look different so publicly in front of what Edon assumed were like… All of its friends. It sat in Arseni’s lap like a doll, despite being pretty average sized for a human. Edon was very passable as a very average-to-kinda-ugly human man with some kind of serious personality problem. The Cherubim looked at it with interest. Some of them had never really gotten to touch a human before.

“Wow, it looks soft.” One of them said, reaching over to poke it in its soft chest. She was a very odd looking Cherub because she had no human head. It looked as if it had been cut from her body entirely leaving only a neck, scarred over. Her other three heads were intact, though.

“Ah!” It cried out, not really expecting them to actually do that.

“Ohh, it is soft! I wanna pick it up, can I?” She asked.

“Edon, do you want Silaa to pick you up?” It asked. “Don’t worry, she’s just curious. She has been trapped in those Archives for a long time, she hasn’t seen a human in a long time-”

“Not since my Watcher days. Oh, when I heard you knew Azazel, I was like, WOAH! Fuck, I haven’t even thought about that guy in years.”

“Um… I guess so?” Edon said, not really opposed to the idea, but a little conflicted.

“How was that, by the way?” Arseni asked, handing Edon over to the other Cherub like it was a party favor. She played with its hair a little bit and inspected it on all sides, turning it in her hands.

“Being a Watcher? It was… um… I mean, it was fine. It was really confusing, we were given really vague instructions, it was almost like God WANTED us to get bored and start having sex with the humans. Because the humans weren’t that interesting, really. They just did stuff. Occasionally one of them would kill or maim another one and they’d all get in a little fight, but, it wasn’t very interesting. And they were hot.” She said. “So, I mean… wow, you really feel like a human!” She said, poking at it more, in its belly this time. Edon was DEFINITELY not ready to unpack how it felt about THAT, feeling blood rush downwards as that area of its body was touched and played with so teasingly and gently… It was VERY aware that this was where humans kept their vital organs, and the knowledge that this angel could easily be less gentle and eviscerate it… yet she was choosing to be teasing and gentle with his belly… that did things to it.

Also… y’know… it felt nice. A little too nice for Edon to ignore it. It made a mental note about that, wiggling at her touch and pressing into it a little bit.

“Did He give you any instructions at all?”

“Not really.” She replied, still poking at Edon’s belly and tickling it, watching it struggle and suppress moans, a reaction she enjoyed immensely. “Honestly I started fucking them on month two. The first month, I was like, yeah, whatever. But then the second month I saw one touch itself to a sketch it drew of some boobs and I was like. Okay. I can’t just stand here and watch this happen and not join.”

“Hey, you can’t have it all to yourself,” said Jaasiel, taking Edon out of Silaa’s grasp. “Some of us have never touched a human before!”

“I’m not even a human! Don’t you all have one of your own forms?” Edon asked, struggling a bit in its grasp.

“We’ve never had to use them.” Naniai said. It lifted up one of its arms and let it drop. Edon was embarrassed to the extreme that this was turning it on.

“Hey!!! Those are MY body parts!” It said, pulling its arms up to cover its chest.

“And we want to play with them.” Silaa said. Jaasiel looked like he was on board, and took Edon from Silaa’s hands. Naniai picked up one of Edon’s feet and tried to lift it up by the ankle.

“You have to be GENTLE with me!” It said, holding onto Jaasiel’s clothes for dear life. “This body is fragile!”

“Oh, we will be gentle!” Naniai assured it.

“Gentler than you are being right now,” Edon clarified.

“Sorry.” Naniai apologized, putting down its foot.

“Look, I know it’s either been a long while or forever since any of you have touched a human,” Arseni said, “So, how about I demonstrate first? Hand it to me.” It requested.

“Okay… but you better share…” Jaasiel said, wary. He handed over Edon, who was embarrassingly hard by now. It looked up at Arseni and felt safe, trusting this Cherub not to let this go too far…

“It is deceptively simple. Humans like being gently touched. Especially like this,” Arseni said, taking Edon’s hands away from its chest so that it could toy with its nipples. Edon had never had this done to it before, and on top of that, it didn’t really LIKE its boobs, but, damn, that kind of felt good… “A lot of them have shitty backs, too, so they love back rubs just as much as virtues do. The human spine is honestly proof enough that God makes mistakes.” Arseni commented, taking its hands off Edon’s chest to rub its back. “Does your back usually hurt?”

“No!” Edon replied.

“Okay, well, if you ask that question to a human, they will be like, ‘YES it hurts all the time.’” It said to its friends. They nodded, committing this to memory. “They also like it when you touch their bodies softly, trail your hands up from their hips, like this…” Arseni demonstrated, dragging its fingertips up Edon’s sides and making it shiver. “...and you’ll have them begging for it. But you can get creative, too.” It explained.

“Ooh, I see. And could a human fit this in their mouth?” Naniai asked, spreading its legs and showing Edon its pussy and clit. It had the standard configuration of a fairly large, pointed and heart shaped clit with little spikes surrounding the base of it resting above a vertical slit that Edon could only assume was its cloaca. Edon’s eye went wide, and it really hoped that wasn’t just a hypothetical.

“Oh yeah. Easily.” Silaa responded. “You are not even that big.”

“HEY!”

“W-what do you mean?!” Edon asked, never really having SEEN Cherub clit before. Silaa giggled and pulled her skirt to the side, showing hers, which, yeah, no, that was a lot bigger than Naniai’s. It was… and it hated to make this comparison, but, it was like looking at Ezekiel and Isaiah side by side. Ezekiel was… below average to say the least, he’d really not gotten a lot of bottom growth. Isaiah’s t dick looked much closer to the ones Edon had saved on Reddit (on Ezekiel’s phone, no less,) those trans dudes that are HUNG.

On humans, it hardly made a difference really, but, with the Cherubim being as large as they were height wise… Edon wasn’t so sure it COULD take Silaa. Not all of her, anyway. Not in this body.

“No fair, I want to play, too!” Jaasiel complained, pulling his clothing out of the way and revealing its cock, which Edon could already tell was NOT going to fit.

“NO way!” Edon said. “I am putting my foot down, that is NOT going inside me, NOT in this body, not tonight, not EVER.”

“How about between your thighs?” Arseni offered.

“What?!”

“Like, what if he doesn’t penetrate you, and instead just slides between your thighs while you try your best to please two pussies at once?” Arseni asked. Edon looked down at its thighs and then back up at Jaasiel, who was significantly bigger than Arseni.

“...Then I… then I am just going to be tempted…” It said slowly. “That sounds. Hot.”

“Oh, I do not mind AT ALL.” Jaasiel said. “Be tempted all you like.”

Arseni summoned a few astral hands and held Edon up at pussy eating height, belly up, so that it would have its entire face kind of just shoved into Naniai’s cunt while it ate her out. Jaasiel got on the other side, slipping his cock between Edon’s thighs and holding them together for a little more friction, fucking them slowly and softly at first.

Edon was loving this. It was devoting about 80% of its brain power to softly sucking on the clit in its mouth and enjoying the taste, and 20% of its brain power to wiggling and shifting its hips to try and chase any amount of stimulation on its dick. It did NOT help Edon’s concentration abilities when Silaa got bored immediately and decided to participate by touching and poking at Edon all over again, dragging her hands up and down its sides, poking at its belly and chest and butt, and otherwise being a very arousing nuisance.

And that was what Raphael walked in on, as he arrived on scene with about twenty or thirty Angels of Punishment armed with knives and bladed whips, ready to beat the shit out of everyone here. The table the Cherubim had been sitting around was in direct view of the front door, and even still, their whole deal wasn’t even the part of this wine fueled orgy that caught the Archangel’s eye first. What caught his eye FIRST was the barrels and barrels and BARRELS of alcohol, and the immediate realization that thirty cops was NOT going to be nearly enough to shut this down, and that he had been HAD. Arseni with its dick out was a close second, though.

“ARSENI!!!!” he yelled, loud enough that the loud ass music didn’t even cover it up. “I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!”

“Oh, shit.” Arseni said, dropping Edon to the floor. “Go go go!!! Change back to your true form! Grab Reis!! Let’s GO!!!” It pulled out its phone and did another announcement over the speakers. “HEY, PARTY PEOPLE!!!! RAPHAEL AND HIS SHITTY COPS JUST CRASHED THE PARTY! YOU BETTER GET OUT NOW OR DIE TRYING! MAY I REMIND YOU ALL ABOUT THE AFTERPARTY ON EARTH!!!! NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING!!!”

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!” The Archangel yelled, as the partygoers started to go into fight or flight mode. Everyone was panicking and rushing around everywhere, fleeing into adjoining rooms, panicking, crying, throwing things. All of these angels were at the very least, a LITTLE bit drunk. Some of them were long time rulebreakers, but, now, there were a LOT more first timers here. And ultimately, they were terrified. A decent number of angels with newly popped cherries were EXTREMELY concerned that this was it, they were gonna be destroyed. A decent number of angels who’d been hiding their mating cycles for years were extremely concerned that they’d finally done it this time. Someone threw a molotov cocktail in the general direction of the door, which lit the curtains on fire and sent everyone into even more of a panic.

Edon transformed as it was dropped to the floor, barely catching itself as it made a beeline for Arseni’s room, with Arseni following close behind.

“What is going on?” Reis asked, eight beers and half an extremely strong pot brownie deep, injured, with the lidocaine wearing off.

“We are going to Earth,” Edon said, nodding at Arseni as they struggled to but eventually succeeded in wrapping Reis up in the comforter for transport. “...How do we get out of here? Did we just barricade ourselves in?”

“No, I got an emergency exit.” Arseni clarified, which was good because there was now loud banging on the door to its bedroom and the wood was starting to splinter. They lifted Reis and took him to the shower room, where Arseni pried the mirror off the wall to reveal a secret door, which led to the outside of the Mansions. “Go on. I’ll be right behind you, I just need to… tie up some loose ends…”

+++

Ezekiel looked up and watched as the sky lit up in what could potentially pass for a meteor shower. But he knew better. He looked up at the sky box Isaiah was sitting in and gave the signal, and Isaiah pressed a few buttons, turning on the big spotlights, pointing them up at the sky, and signaling for Aethriel and Baraqiel to come back down. It was now 11 pm.

It took a good few minutes. And… then a good few more. And then… um… weren’t they COMING?! What the fuck was going on? He almost wanted to call Edon, but felt that the chances of Edon picking up were slim, and it seemed like something seriously bad might be happening. Like… a battle, or something. He could see what kind of looked like fire and explosions in the midst of the lights in the sky.

“That is not good,” Kokabel stood next to the human who was just standing there in awe.

“Yeah… um… what do we… do?” He asked.

“Nothing.” He said, “This is unfortunately something they are going to have to deal with themselves. The fall is never pretty.”

“Wait, I thought you said they weren’t going to FALL!” `Ezekiel said, now extremely worried.

“I mean, not technically, not in a spiritual sense. But in a literal one, yes. Unless they are thrown from Heaven directly, or otherwise thrown physically or dragged into hell, it is not a spiritual fall. If my calculations are correct, choosing to come to Earth is not the same thing, no matter the reason. God wants those angels in Heaven, at least, RIGHT NOW He does, and that is what matters for their safety.”

“Are you like… SURE about that?!” Ezekiel asked.

“I am pretty sure, yes.” Kokabel responded. “Ziqel disagrees with me. He says that it could potentially hurt them if they are identified, charged, and officially punished before they hit the ground, but… it is Christmas. The courts are not even open. He also thinks they could be hurt if they hit hellfire directly, which, yeah, that part is true. Or if one of the angels working for God is actually able to grab ahold of any of them and throw them out intentionally, like, if they are refusing to leave the party on their own accord… or if they are captured at the party… or if they chase them down to Earth and start an actual battle…”

“Okay… so…. What you’re saying is, we should have prepared a medical team.” He said, watching the battle in the sky.

“We DID prepare a medical team. You missed that meeting.”

“...Oh.”

Within thirty minutes, the first angels started arriving at the party. The first one to turn up was a very nervous, very tipsy messenger angel that was extremely put off by the crowd of several thousand humans cheering for him as he entered. For the most part, they all thought this was part of the show. He was quite the sight to look at, being mostly engulfed in flame and covered in eyes. He was a little more humanoid than most of the messengers Isaiah had seen.

“What the HELL is going on?!” He asked, fully on display for these people, very shocked at the cheering in response to that question. “What are all of you people DOING here?! It is Christmas EVE!”

“It’s a party!!!” Isaiah shouted over the speakers. “We’re getting drunk, we’re listening to music, and we’re FUCKING each other!”

“WHAT?!” He asked, surveying the crowd and seeing that this was very true.

“Yeah! You ever fucked a human before?” Isaiah asked. “Everyone!!! Make some NOISE if you’d fuck this guy!” The crowd went wild and the angel blushed bright red.

“Well? Go ahead, take your pick! Go wild! Have fun!”

As more and more angels started coming down, the party turned up. Going from fleeing heaven in terror to celebrating the fall was… a VERY desirable thing for a lot of these angels, who at this point were upset, fed up, and just wanted to do what THEY wanted to do for a change.

Not to paraphrase too directly from 1 Enoch, but, the Angels of Heaven came down and saw that humanity was beautiful and comely, and they desired the humans, and the humans desired them back. And the angels began to go in to them, and defile themselves through them. And it was a really, really good time. The Watchers who’d helped set up this whole event were loving this, it was like getting to relive the old days again. The humans in attendance were getting railed/railing some of the most sexually repressed, newly liberated beings in the universe. And through it all, Ezekiel watched the skies, waiting with bated breath for Edon to return…

+++

Gemarai had been one of the lower middle heavens Seraphim for… what was it now… about… two thousand years or so? Maybe somewhere around 2,020 years, give or take a few? He was bred specifically to replace another Seraph who had been destroyed by God. Same story for almost every Seraph born. And he had tried very hard to be good.

He took the lash the same as every Seraph, trying to reason with himself that it was out of love that he was punished, that God loved him, and that he should be thankful that God cared enough about him to punish him when he made mistakes, to guide him on the path of continual praise and worship…
But… oh… he was tired. He had not landed on solid ground for one thousand years. And when he was told to go and look for some of the Seraphim who had seemingly just left the throne room and not returned, that had been his true intention, to find them. What he had found was answers, answers to questions he had been too afraid to even think about.

Now, locked out of heaven, completely unclear as to what to do now, he sat awkwardly at the bar at this rave in silence, unclear on what to do to even try this whole “living separate from God” thing out. He hadn’t had anything to drink yet. He was VERY confused. Watching other angels on the arms of humans made him feel so jealous, but he wasn't sure why. He'd been a good Seraph for centuries! So good that he'd been put on the list for approved reproduction! He’d even been TRAINED! Why was he so covetous, now?!

“Do you like, want something?” Said the human across the bar, who was acting as a volunteer bartender, as none of these bars actually had people RUNNING them. It was anarchy out here. He was wearing a jockstrap, a fishnet long sleeve shirt, platform docs, and nothing else. He was COVERED in tattoos and had shoulder length black hair. Gemarai was STARING at his pecs, not really sure if that was allowed…?

“I… have no money or goods with which to pay you.” Gemarai said, folding up its wings uncomfortably.

“Haha, it’s free dude!” Said the human, pouring the Seraph a rum and coke and sliding it across the bar table. “Try some of this!”
“Are you not afraid of me?” Asked the angel, staring at the drink.
“I’ve had weirder trips.” Said the human. “My name is Marty. What’s yours?”
“I am not supposed to tell you,” Said the Seraph.
“...Okay, well, are you supposed to be staring at my chest?” He asked, and Gemarai immediately closed all of its eyes, and got ready to fly away. “Hey, hey hey!! Wait! Don’t GO! I like it! I’m down with it!” He said, nudging the drink closer towards the angel. “You don’t have to tell me your name if you don’t wanna. I’m sorry. You just… you look lonely. I wanted to talk to you.” Gemarai folded up its wings again.
“M…maybe.” He replied. “I am very nervous. I do not know any of the rules, to speaking, here.”
“Rules? Man, there are no rules.” Marty said. “You can say whatever you want, pretty much.”
“I have never spoken this many words in a row without…. without praising the Most High.” He admitted. “It feels. Scary. It feels. Wrong. I feel as though I will be harmed.”
“Who is here to harm you?” Marty asked. The Seraph looked around, seeing only humans too preoccupied with their good time to notice him, and corrupt angels who had defected from Heaven alongside them. He realized that he, too, was one of those angels.
“...Nobody.” He replied.
“No harm will come to you, then.” Marty said. Gemarai felt tears prick at the corners of its eyes. “Hey, hey! It’s alright, pretty thing, you’re okay!”
“I am so tired…” It cried, picking up the drink Marty poured for it and downing it in one motion. The alcohol burned its throat and it coughed. It hadn’t ever put anything inside its mouth before. This shitty rum and coke that was poured by a human on LSD was the first thing it ever tasted.
“Here, do you wanna go to one of the rooms where there’s less noise?” Marty asked, and the angel nodded. “Let me take you there. We can sit down and rest and you can take a little nap if you want to.”
“T-that… would be… a sin.” It protested.
“I mean, if we’re keeping with the theme here, I feel like you’ve already sinned. Like. Kind of a lot, actually. Who’s keeping track, now? Does it matter if it's a sin if it hurts no one and feels good?”
“...I… I do not know anymore.” Gemarai admitted. “I feel as though I know nothing anymore.”
“I think a nap would help you.” Marty said. “This party is a little overstimulating. I know there are rooms to take a little break in around here.” He jumped over the bar to get closer to the angel. “There are even private ones.”
“Please,” replied the Seraph, giving in. “Oh, a nap… that… sounds… wonderful…”
Marty guided the angel to one of these rooms. He’d kind of been lying; the rooms weren’t really MEANT for sleeping, but they were private, quiet, dark rooms with a bed. They were aligned in the hallways of the stadium like a bathhouse hallway, with all those doors and rooms. Marty found an empty one big enough for the both of them and they entered together, locking the door behind them. Marty pulled back the sheets on the bed and beckoned the Seraph into the not super comfortable but definitely usable bed. He got in after him, watching with amusement as the angel’s eyes slowly blinked.
“Oh, I forgot to ask, can I stay with you while you nap?” Asked Marty. “I would love to cuddle up with you and maybe, uh, if you’re cool with it, I could rub your back?”
“Please do not leave me here alone.” Gemarai responded. “Please get closer.” His body heat was like a drug to the angel, who, now more than ever, craved closeness. Marty abided by this request, snuggling up with him as close as he could get. The angel sighed softly, so fucking tired, so fucking comfortable… oh, he wanted to die this way. He would die so happy in this position. Marty began to rub his back, focusing his careful attention on the angel's very tired wings… He closed his eyes and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
He woke about an hour and a half later to the human entering the room again, holding a huge plate of food he’d grabbed from one of the tables supplying the feast. He was a bit upset that the human hadn’t stayed, but… he was not shocked, and did not want to make a big deal out of it.
“Oh, you’re awake already!” Marty said, “I’m so sorry, I was gonna get back in bed with you, but, I thought you’d want something to eat and drink when you woke up, so, I got some things for you to try.”
“I do not eat.” Said the angel.
“CAN you eat?” Marty asked.
“I… CAN…” The Seraph said, slowly. “It is… forbidden. But… um. So is sleeping.”
“So… wanna try some shrimp?” Marty asked, holding up the shrimp and dipping sauce he’d brought. “It’s pretty fucking good, I tried some.”
“Okay, um, well. I definitely cannot eat shellfish.” The angel said, cringing a little bit as he watched Marty shrug and eat the shrimp in one bite.
“Okay, how about these dumplings? They’re also really good.”
“What kind are they?”
“Pork and cabbage.”
“Okay, did you bring ANYTHING else?!” Gemarai asked, a little frustrated now.
“Um… yeah, I got a cheese steak-”
“No.”
“Rabbit stew…”
“No…”
“I got these sick ass blood sausages on hotdog rolls, I tried them, I’ve never had that before but they’re actually really awesome-”
“NO!!!”
“Okay, I also got some cake, which doesn’t have any meat in it. I’m getting the impression that you can’t eat meat.”
“Well, technically, I cannot eat ANYTHING, but especially not all of that stuff! Usually meat is fine, but, every part of that tray is something that YOU should not be eating either!! And, is all that food touching each other?!” He asked, tilting his perspective to get a look at the plate, which also had grapes and some dish with mealworms in it.
“...Yes…”
“I cannot eat any of that, not even the cake if it is touching the other stuff. And neither can you!”
“Why not?!” He said, dipping one of the dumplings in the same sauce he'd dipped the shrimp in and biting into it.
“God says! That’s why! And it makes me nervous!!!”
“Are you actually an angel?” Marty asked. “I’m… I’m high right now, not going to lie, and, all night I've been kind of suspicious about the organizers of this event. When I was out there getting food I was also wondering why there were zero traditional Christmas foods and instead the buffet was like, FULL of foods my brothers wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. It was almost comically anti-God’s rules about food out there, like, EVERYTHING either has blood in it or is meat and milk…”
“Yes, I… I am. Or at least I WAS, very recently, and all of that-” He motioned to the tray, “Directly violates God’s law.”
“Okay… so that guy I saw with horns probably wasn’t a cosplayer… well… the only other options are grapes and apples and pomegranates and stuff like that. Oh, and I saw waffles and French toast with weed butter, and there's cookies and weed brownies, but, I'm already fucked up so I didn't bring any of that.”
“Where are the grapes from?”
“How the fuck am I supposed to know!!!” Marty asked, “I just went to this rave, I have no idea how or why certain things are the way they are.”
“How about a pomegranate?” Gemarai requested.
“One step ahead of you.” He pulled a pomegranate out of his tiny little backpack. “I hope this is acceptable.”
“It is… acceptable.” The angel said. It broke open the fruit, salivating at the sight of the plump seeds within, and ate from the fruit.
“How is it? Can I have some?” He asked.
“It is… ohhh… wow…” Gemarai felt the flavor fill his mouth and he did NOT want to share. “Um… no… this is… this is bad for you, I could not share it…”
“Hey, you don't have to lie!” Marty said. “It's yours, you can have it. I got plenty of shrimp and dumplings over here.” He said. Gemarai finished the pomegranate very quickly, even eating the shell of the fruit in its entirety in his rapidly increasing hunger. He hadn't really noticed just how hungry he was until the fruit was gone and he found himself looking at those grapes with intensity.
“...Marty, could I have… the grapes… too…” He asked, nervously.
“Yeah, sure! You sure you don't care where they're from?”
“I… I am hungry. So very hungry,” He said, “I no longer wish to know where they came from.”
“Good, because they probably came from Hell.” Marty joked, picking up the grapes and handing a few of them to the angel. For some reason it really struggled with picking them off the vine, and Marty ended up basically hand feeding them to the poor thing which was still under the covers in bed. Soon enough the grapes were entirely gone. And then the other fruits. And then the cake, and then…
“Please… please let me have some of the other… food.” Gemarai asked.
“Which food? Want some soup? It's still warm.”
“....Um… uh…” He was REALLY conflicted. But Marty made it look SO tasty. “Can… I try… the dumplings…”
“Yeah of course!! These are my favorite.” He said, dipping one in sauce and placing it in the Angel's mouth. His eyes went wide and he looked from the tray to Marty to the door which was locked, still.
“....Give me the tray,” He said, and Marty laughed, handing him the tray of food and watching the Seraph devour more than 70% of what was on it, amazed at how fucking GOOD this tasted and how nice it felt to fill its stomach with something, for the first time... The only thing he avoided entirely was the blood sausages.
Marty reached out and played with his feathers as he ate, messing with them and tugging on them and trying his best to provide a sense of comforting touch for the poor creature as he satisfied some of his most base desires for food and comfort and REST.
“You done?” Marty asked, as Gemarai placed the tray back on the bedside table and laid down in bed. Marty tried his best to wipe down the feathers around his mouth and laid back down beside the angel who looked very, very satisfied and very comfortable.
“Y-yes…” he confirmed, sighing at the feeling of hands rifling through his feathers, so comfortable and calm, so rested, so full, this was the best it had felt in centuries, maybe even ever. “Thank you… for the food.”
“No problem man!” Marty said, playing with the feathers on the Seraph’s abdomen, now. “You wanna tell me your name now, or…?”
“I am called Gemarai,” He said.
“That's a pretty cool name. And uh, you're an angel?”
“I am a Seraph,” He confirmed.
“What, uh, what is that?” Marty asked.
“We fly around and praise God and we… um.. we never sleep, or eat, or rest. And we sometimes go to Earth to speak to humans about prophecy… but I only did that a very small few times.” He explained.
“That sounds terrible.” Marty said.
“It was not so bad.” Gemarai said. Then he thought about it a little harder. “....It was… it was actually pretty bad.”
“Well, I already told you my name is Marty. And I'm… uh… I work at a restaurant. I don't know. I was GONNA be a stay at home dad, or something, but… it didn't really work out like that. So I'm a line cook now.” He said.
“What is a restaurant?” Gemarai asked.
“It's like a place you go and you buy… food. And other people cook it for you. I'm the people that cook it for you.”
“It sounds nice to work at a… restaurant.” Gemarai said.
“Oh, it isn't.” He replied. “But it's not nearly as bad as what you just described.”
“What is the best part?” Gemarai asked.
“Of working at a restaurant? I mean honestly?? The best part is fucking my coworkers.” He joked. “I’ve dicked down like… probably sixty, seventy percent of my coworkers?” The angel was silent.
“Your… female coworkers?” He asked, not betraying anything in his voice just yet.
“Oh, don't give me that. You're not going to sit here and tell me you're homophobic, now, are you?”
“...Well… God says-”
“Seems like God says a LOT of things.” Marty interrupted. “But to answer your question, I don’t discriminate. I’m fucking my coworkers, regardless of gender.”
“I… I was going to say it is adultery regardless of if you are homosexual or not.” Gemarai said, “You did not let me finish. I just. I am… I am a male. And… um… we are… I am… I have already sinned so deeply… I do know how reproductive acts work, and I am aware that males…together…” He trailed off.
“Go on.” Gemarai almost wished he hadn’t said that and had instead just kissed him already.
“This bed. We are in it together. I was under the impression that ‘sharing a bed’ may have another… meaning. To a human.” He explained. Marty gave him a look. “We are both males. But… I… I think you are…you know. And I was thinking, you know, if you are interested in males, too…” He trailed off yet again.
“I think you’re sexy, too.” He replied. The angel immediately looked VERY flustered, unable to make eye contact.
“Well-! I-! Um!!! I… I did not say SEXY…”
“So you don’t think I’m hot?” Marty asked, playing with the waistband of his jockstrap.
“I… I think… um…!” Marty pulled the waistband down enough to uncover his hipbones, and watched as the angel stared intently at them. He lifted the covers off of the Seraph slowly, revealing that the angel was very obviously hard, now. In all honesty he’d gotten hard and his dick had everted for the second or third time ever around the time that Marty started hand feeding him grapes and praising him for sinning. “Oh!!! I am sorry!!! You were not supposed to see that!!!” Its dick was the same as Cardamom’s; a slimy, wet, pointed at the tip tentacle cock that protruded when aroused from the cloaca, dripping with arousal and writhing in the air, searching for some kind of stimulation.
“Hey, I am NOT upset about it.” Marty said. “Wow. You’re really excited...”
“Please… do not make fun of me,” Gemarai requested in a small voice.
“No, no! Angel, baby, I am NOT making fun of you! I’m asking you if you want to try out my pussy.” He said.
“Pussy?”
“Don’t tell me you don’t know what that means.”
“...You are a man, no?” Gemarai asked.
“In every way that matters,” Marty said, “But yeah, I have a pussy. If that’s a problem for you, we don’t have to do anything.”
“No, I… I just… I do not…”
“I’ll go.” Marty said, getting out of bed.
“No!!! No, please, do not leave!” The angel begged, “I am not upset that you have a vagina! I mean. I am confused, a little bit, but, not angry! Not opposed!” He said. “Is it… is it SAFE for us to… cohabitate, if you have a uterus?”
“Safe? Like, am I gonna get pregnant?” The human asked.
“...Yes.”
“Um… I don’t think so?? I don’t think a human and an angel could make a baby, that doesn’t really make a ton of sense to me.”
“What about the Nephilim?”
“What the fuck is a Nephilim?” Marty asked.
“It is… when… um…” Gemarai explained, trying to figure out how to say this. “W-when an angel and a human love each other very much-”
“Okay, okay! I get it. Um. I think that might just be a scary story.” Marty said. “I mean, I think two completely different beings with completely different DNA probably can’t make a kid. I mean, have you ever even met a… what did you call it?”
“A Nephilim.”
“Yeah, one of those. Have you ever seen one?”
“...No…”
“And I’ve never seen one either. So, what are the chances that they’re real, and not just a lie made up to scare you straight?”
“...The chances are probably low.” He said, wanting so badly to believe that as he watched Marty pull off his jockstrap and reveal himself. He also took his packer out of the front pocket of the garment and set it on the desk, and DAMN, he packed big.
“Exactly. So, I mean, up to you. Do you want me to get in bed with you, cuddle up, take your cock to the base and let you fill me up like a fucking cream donut or do you wanna just sit here some more and talk about God?”
“Definitely the former.” Gemarai replied. “But… um…this is so different from how it was, in heaven… practically none of my training applies… I am extremely nervous.”
“Hey, it’s okay. We can take this nice and slow.” Marty promised. “How would you feel about some kisses, first?”
“...I would very much enjoy some kisses.” The angel replied.
“C’mere.” Marty said, climbing back into bed and pulling him in. They kissed, softly and gently at first. Marty was surprised by the amount of TEETH this being had, rows and rows and rows like a shark did. After a few relatively chaste kisses, he slipped his tongue into the angels’ mouth, surprised yet again when Gemarai reciprocated nervously with more than one tongue; Marty counted three. After only a few minutes, Gemarai couldn’t take it anymore. Marty was being so gentle with him, being so understanding. He wasn’t being pushy or rushing the poor angel, and was taking great care to make this NICE for him. His hands felt so good in his feathers, he was such a good kisser… it was turning Gemarai on something awful, and he couldn’t help but start making it known he wanted more, pulling the human closer and grinding on his hip quite pathetically. Even that felt pretty good. He felt safe for the first time in a VERY long time. “Is this your way of telling me you’re ready for a little more?” Marty asked, ghosting his hands over the Seraph’s sensitive parts which were still pressed against his hip.
“Mmm.” The Seraph nodded, feeling embarrassed.
“How do we… do this?” Marty asked. “How do Seraphim normally do this? Maybe it would be more comfortable for you if we do this how you're used to.”
“I… well… um… I have never done it before, but, I know what they do to make more Seraphim. I was um… on the list, so to speak, if God needed more angels… I do not know about non-procreative sex. But when we MATE, we…” He shifted in bed, pushing Marty underneath him, onto his hands and knees. “We kind of… um… the male gets on top, and um, the female…”
“Okay, ground rule.” Marty said, “Call me a female one more time and this sex act ends.”
“I am not saying YOU!!!” He argued. “I mean, when SERAPHIM mate! I am answering your question! The female gets on the bottom and kind of. Raises herself up a bit… it is called presenting. It is like this…” He pushed him down so his chest was on the mattress. The angel had to bite its tongues to prevent itself from saying something that Marty really wouldn't like, as he was getting a VERY good view of the human face down, ass up, legs spread, doing a very good job of PRESENTING himself for the angel. He really DID look like those diagrams Gemarai had seen back when he'd been considered for the mating program… “a-and then….” Gemarai’s cock found its way between Marty’s legs, sliding along his sensitive flesh. “Ooh… wow… um… then…. Then we… I guess I… I should put it in… w-which is called coupling,” He said, trying to convince himself that this was educational, technically.
“Take your time,” Marty said, “Try grinding on me, move yourself a little bit over the outside of me.”
“O-okay… I will try that…” He attempted this, grinding over Marty’s entrance and learning just how SLIPPERY it was down there. He felt so soft, his folds felt so INVITING, Gemarai had to exercise an incredible amount of restraint to not just let his cock catch on his entrance and slide in. Like Aethriel had experienced a few months ago, this was the Seraph’s first time experiencing real pleasure. The difference here was that Gemarai was already aware at this point of the magnitude of his sin, and the concept that he could potentially have sex was not foreign to him. At this point he had no reason to hold back, considering their venue and circumstances of meeting. He could get used to this.
“You got me so fucking wet,” Marty said, spreading his pussy to give the angel an even better view of the hole he’d be fucking. “You are so gorgeous, I saw you at the bar and I was like… I want him in my bed, I don’t even know what he is, but I want him.”
“I felt the same about you.” Gemarai replied. His eyes were trained on the human’s pussy, almost completely unable to tear his gaze from it. “Please, can I penetrate you now…? You look so soft… “ He practically begged, rutting against Marty a little more aggressively.
“Ah, come on! Give it a little more time.” The human said. “It's best to savor these things… don't I look pretty like this?” He asked, teasingly.
“Y-you look…” He said, struggling to find the words in a language Marty would understand. “You look like you want me to get you pregnant so badly.” He settled on that, mind a little distracted. “You are presenting yourself to me like you are a b-” He stopped himself before he said ‘bitch in heat’, again thinking maybe Marty might not like that very much, and switching to “...B-breeding mount. Please, come on, I am right there…” The angel couldn't help but slip the very tip of his dick into his pussy on the next pass. It was just too tempting. Doing that just made his need worse…
“How the fuck do you know what a breeding mount is, but you don't know what a restaurant is?” Marty asked. Gemarai held his hips and pressed another few inches into the human, now truly unable to stop himself. That little taste of soft wet heat was too much. It was too good. He needed to be deeper in there and it needed to happen now.
“I-I am not in a headspace where I can answer that for you!” The angel said, giving in entirely and just sliding all the way in, having met no resistance from Marty, getting most of its cock into the man underneath him and bottoming out with the tip of the tentacle squished up against his cervix. It was a huge relief to do that. He had really needed this, so fucking bad, and sinking inside of Marty was scratching a multi century long unscratched itch... He could barely handle this sensation, if he was being honest, and had to stop and hold himself there for a good while just getting USED to that before he could continue teaching the human how new Seraphim are made, like he'd asked. Or whatever it was Gemarai was convincing himself that he was doing.
The angel had never actually been SELECTED, but he knew he'd been on the list. If one of his friends was to be destroyed, he was aware that he may be required to go in and provide genetic material to replace them. He'd been put through the education, with the diagrams and the morality training, and right now he knew that his job was pretty simple: get as deep as possible and absolutely do not under any circumstances pull out until ejaculation is achieved and completed, because if you're being commanded to breed someone, you better follow through. And also pulling out is a sin, especially if God is specifically commanding you not to.
“There you go, I think you're all the way in. Stay like that for a second, just enjoy the feeling.” Marty said, gently squeezing around his cock and trying hard to look over his shoulder. “We have ALL night, you can enjoy this for as long as you want.”
“It is too much!!” He said, rocking himself into the human and sort of grinding himself into his pussy rhythmically.
“Am I too tight?”
“N-no!!! It is just!! I am not used to this!” He said. “You feel s-so good… I… I will try to stay still, but it is difficult!! I…” He gripped Marty's hips with two astral hands, pressing him closer so as to make sure he was as deep as possible. “I am exercising all the control I can…”
“Aw, I'm sorry babe! I don't want you to have to hold back.” Marty put his chest closer to the mattress and gave the angel the best possible access that he could. “I just thought an innocent little virgin might appreciate being told there's no rush. But if you're ready, how about this time you just go ahead? You must be SO pent up, I don't want to tease you, go ahead and breed me.”
Marty really didn't have to say that twice. Gemarai fucked him like he was starving, like he was barely able to control his own pace. It was hard and deep and erratic, the Seraph had no idea what it was doing. All it had been told about this part was that “instinct would take it from there” and, yeah, that was pretty accurate. He felt the intense need to cum inside this pretty human, to fill his oviduct and make SURE one of those eggs develops an embryo…
“You are going to look SO good fertilized,” the Seraph said to Marty, in a language that had been dead for hundreds of years. “I-I cannot wait to see your belly grow, oh fuck, I will do this every single day until we are SURE you are carrying…”
Marty could hear that the angel was saying something while he fucked him, but he really didn't understand what. He didn't know what language that was, and he probably wouldn't have been able to guess that it was mostly senseless babbling about eggs.
“I don't know what you're saying but it's hot!” He said. Gemarai was far too invested in the feeling of human pussy to concentrate on understanding Marty's language or speaking in it. He felt like he really was at a breeding mount, which was a thing he'd had to do once before. He remembered the experience as very awkward, terribly embarrassing and very… clinical. It feels so much nicer, he thought, when it is so WARM…
“A-and then, when we know you are carrying, I will still do it every day and we can just pretend that we do not know!” He said, getting very into this fantasy, not fully understanding that Marty wasn't following here. “God is never going to find out. I-I think I can get at least, fuck, I could get at least three eggs fertilized, you will surely be chosen again…” He stabilized a little bit into some sort of regular pace, finding that it felt better like that. Marty's pussy felt incredible. Gemarai was figuring out how to optimize that. “I am going to completely fill your oviduct, you are so small, you will overflow with it, fuck, please, I am so close, we will make so many little offspring, He will pair us up again and again…”
“Dude what?” Marty said, not having understood any of that. He was enjoying himself though. Gemarai wasn't bad for a being that didn't understand or care about his anatomy at all.
“I am going to cum,” the angel admitted, in English this time, unable to handle the combined sensation and fantasy of getting this human pregnant, no matter how little understanding it had of that process.
“Go ahead, cum inside me!” Marty said, goading him on. “There's nothing stopping you, come on, empty your balls in me, there you go-!”
Gemarai had absolutely no intention of pulling out anyway. He came as close to balls deep as a being that doesn't have balls could, pumping the smaller being full and holding onto him for dear life. There was a good amount of cum, close to a third cup over a good thirty seconds, and most of it went all over the bed no matter how inserted the angel was. He struggled to stay upright, fucking into him in short, erratic little thrusts as he came, unable to suppress its soft moans as it finally got to unload where it was SUPPOSED to. Doing this here felt RIGHT.
“Fuck… wow, that was a LOT!” Marty commented as his partner came down, grabbing Marty around the hips and chest and flopping over onto the bed so they could stay entwined more comfortably. Marty pulled the covers over them. “You must have REALLY needed that… you doing okay?”
“Fff, hhh,,,” He was just making little noises, unable to fully grasp the situation just yet.
“Yeah? You tired?”
“Mhm….”
“Feeling good?”
“Y-yes…” He pressed his mouth to Marty's back to give him a kiss.
“Aww, so sweet. What were you talking about, back there?” He asked as they cuddled softly.
“...Getting you… um… pregnant.” He admitted. “I do apologize… that… may have been…”
“Hey, that's okay! That's pretty hot, actually, y'know? Especially because I mean, you can't actually get me pregnant.”
“...I kind of wish that I could…” he said, softly. “I would like to watch you grow with my eggs.”
“Eggs? Ha, yeah, no way could you get me pregnant if Seraphim lay eggs. Humans give live birth, so, yeah. No fucking way at all, your chromosomes are probably way too different.” Gemarai was actually a little disappointed by that, even though he knew how bad of an idea it would be to actually get a human pregnant. “But I mean, we should definitely do that again.”
“I will need a few minutes…” the angel admitted, nervously.
“No, I don't - ha, you mean right now?”
“I thought you were talking about right now…?”
“Well, hey, I am not against a good round two!!” Marty said. “Maybe we could do it human style for round two. We'll fuck in missionary and I'll talk about how you're gonna put a baby in me and we're gonna make the next fucking messiah or whatever.” He teased. That REALLY got the angel, who pressed closer to Marty in embarrassment. “Oh, you like that, huh?”
“...A little…”
“Does it do anything for you that I've never actually done that before, at least, not in a way that could get me pregnant?” Marty admitted. “Like, I'm a total manwhore of a top. The packer I put on the table has seen MILES of action, but I've never taken bio dick, not in my cunt anyway.”
“I only understood about half of those words.” The angel admitted, and Marty laughed thinking about that ‘none of those words are in the Bible’ Tumblr post.
“I have had sex with a LOT of people using that thing over there.” He pointed to his packer. “I use that because I am a man and I don't have a penis, so, if I want to put a penis in someone, I have to improvise. And I'm usually a top, which means I like putting my dick in other people.” He explained. “And I have bottomed before, but, it's mostly been for cis lesbians back when I thought I was a lesbian. So I was taking a lot of strap.”
“...Strap?”
“Dildos.”
“You are going to have to explain this to me.”
“I got penetrated in the past by a decent number of women who used a similar object to the one that I do, the one over there, just less penis shaped and more fun object shaped.” He tried to make it easier to understand.
“...So you have known no man before me.”
“...I guess??? If you don't count me topping as knowing?” He said.
“Marty…” Gemarai asked. “Are you SURE you cannot get pregnant from an angel?”
“I'm sure. Don’t worry your pretty little head, okay? And even if I did get pregnant, you wouldn't have to raise it. I have a fiancee, we'd raise it.”
“WHAT?!” Gemarai exclaimed, “YOU have a fiancee?! You are betrothed to be wed?!”
“Yeah! Jo is great. Don't worry about it, it's an open relationship.” He said. “She's not gonna be mad. Well. She might be kinda jealous that I got to try angel dick and she was stuck working on fuckin’ Christmas. But she wouldn't be mad at me for having sex.”

+++

“EDON!!!!” Ezekiel shouted, holding out his arms as the Throne finally came down to him, still wearing the cute little green backpack he’d given it. “I am SO glad to see you!! Oh, are you okay?! Did Arseni treat you well?! Are you safe?!”
“I am safe!” It exclaimed, allowing Ezekiel to pull it into a tight hug.
“What took you so long?!” He let the Throne go and pushed it away from him before immediately grabbing it again and pulling it back in, not wanting to be apart.
“I had to drop off… um… someone… with Isaiah and Hermani…” It explained. “I have been SO busy tonight, it has been a disaster! This party isn’t fun at all!”
“I know exactly what you mean, this sucks!” Ezekiel said. “I’ve just been doing work and counting the seconds until I got to see you again.”
“Why is that?” It asked, excitedly.
“Because I MISSED you!!” Ezekiel explained.
“Is that…it?” Edon asked. Ezekiel looked at it in confusion. “Nothing else?”
“...What? Yeah! I missed you! I missed having you around! I missed hanging out!” Edon didn’t seem to like that answer.
“Oh.” Edon said. “Um, I am going to get some food now. There is no food, in heaven… I will see you later…” Ezekiel’s heart dropped a little bit, and he let the Throne out of his grasp.
“I um… I got something for you.” He said, pulling a thermos out of the bag he carried. “Here, it’s chocolate milk.”
“With ice in it?”
“With ice in it.” He said, smiling and handing it to the angel. Edon took the thermos and ripped the top off of it, drinking the entire thing in a matter of seconds. Ezekiel just watched.
“Is there any more?”
“Um, I don’t have any on me, but, I think we have more chocolate milk somewhere…” He said. “Can I come with you to get something to eat?”
“Why are you asking me?” The Throne said. “I cannot stop you. I mean. I could. But. I do not care.”
“I mean… fair.” Ezekiel said. “I was… I dunno… I just… I kind of pictured this a little different, y’know, like… a nice little reunion. We haven’t seen each other in over a month, and all… I was thinking maybe we could kiss, just a little bit…?” Edon sighed.
“Look, I am not in the mood for your EMOTIONS right now.” It said. “Can’t you just be normal, if you are going to act like this?”
“I AM being normal!” He said, following Edon as it drifted over to a table with food on it. “I fucking care about you! I missed you! I mean… I don’t know, everyone has been treating me so weird recently! I thought maybe… I dunno...” He said, deciding maybe the best course of action here was to shut the fuck up about that theory he’d had, which, now that THIS was how their reunion was going… he started to feel REALLY stupid for thinking that maybe he was being denied as some sort of a gift for Edon when it got back. Clearly it didn’t give a fuck at all. And it started making a lot more sense to Ezekiel that maybe that meeting had actually had nothing to do with him at all, and maybe everyone had just decided his novelty had worn off…?
“This is what I mean!” Edon said, eating from the direct center of a cheesecake with its hands. “You are being so annoying and saying pointless emotional things! What makes you think that after ALL of that, after EVERYTHING I went through going back to Heaven and all, standing up for you people, HELPING you, under threat of DEATH, that I am just going to be won over by some chocolate milk you carried around with you for hours at a rave?”
“I… I’m sorry.” He said.
“You should be!” Edon said. “I deserve way better than that!”
“You do!” Ezekiel said. “I completely agree with you, you DO deserve better than that, you deserve better than ME! I… I’m really sorry! And I am going to do better!” He looked at the ground when Edon just didn’t even grace that with a response. “Or… y’know… Alternatively if you’d prefer I leave you alone from now on, just, um, just say the word, I’ll uh. I’ll be out of your way.”
“NO!” Edon said, turning a wheel to directly face him. “Are you crazy?! What is wrong with you?!”
“I really don’t understand what’s going on!” Ezekiel said. “If you didn’t miss me, and I’m being annoying, and I’m being a shitty friend, why would you want me around?!”
“What?! Of COURSE I missed you!” It said. “I’ve been up there, just, just fucking IMAGINING you get railed by Azazel and his Throne, while I sit around through TWO ruts stuck with Arseni who ONLY tops and won’t even TOUCH dick unless you act like it is God’s gift to sexuality the whole time!! It made me BEG for it to let me cum pretty much EVERY TIME! You called me INCESSANTLY and touched yourself and talked about how wet and ready you were and the stupid group chat you’re in now and made me sit there, drooling over just the THOUGHT of getting to taste your cunt, or, fuck, the idea of getting to FINALLY knot you again, while you probably got ALL the dick you wanted and just TORMENTED me for the WHOLE MONTH about how I wasn’t getting ANYTHING! And you kept talking about how it would be ON SIGHT when I returned, how you were going to be there, READY, take me out to dinner and let me finally get some relief from all this!” It said. “And then when I get BACK, you’re all like, ohh, I missed you, here’s some milk! Look at me in my slutty little outfit! I care about you SO MUCH but I am just going to sit here and act like this WHOLE last month DID NOT HAPPEN!!!”
“Okay first of all I’m wearing CARGO SHORTS and a HOODIE.” Ezekiel said. “In what fucking WORLD is that considered SLUTTY??? Second of all what the FUCK gave you the impression I’ve been having ANY sex since you’ve been gone?! And third of all, I JUST SPOKE TO YOU IN PERSON FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A MONTH!!!! What do you want from me, did you want me to greet you naked and oiled up?!”
“The HOODIE!!!” It exclaimed, “IT’S SLUTTY!”
“HOW?!!?”
“IT’S TOO BIG FOR YOU!!!” It said, pulling at his sleeve, which was a little too big for him, but not excessively so. It had a big inverted pentagram on the front of it in red ink on the otherwise black fabric. It said “SECURITY” on the back of it. The cargo shorts he had on were loose and reached his knees, and he was wearing the same shitty old work boots he always did.
“What about that is slutty?!”
“It makes you look SO…. What word do you use?? Breedable?”
“I don’t-”
“I AM JUST VERY UPSET!!!!” Edon stated, as if that wasn’t clear.
“No, I understand THAT, I just don’t understand WHY!”
“I… I don’t really understand, either!!!” It said. “I… I am just… I am jealous!! And desperate! And VERY frustrated in general about a LOT of things, only SOME of which pertain to you!” Ezekiel got a much better look at the angel as it got a bit closer. It looked exhausted, it was dirty and tired and smelled like Arseni’s perfume and spilled beer. He could only imagine the type of night Edon had just had.
“Oh, Edon… There’s really nothing to be jealous about.” Ezekiel was starting to realize that this outburst was more than likely one of Edon’s little temper tantrums and not actually the angel being legitimately upset with him, which was a relief. Edon was NOT good at handling its emotions, not at ALL, and this was all probably a lot.

“Except you having the time of your LIFE fucking around on Earth while I was just up there in Heaven, alone and scared, and you just… you just TEASED me the WHOLE TIME!!!” It complained. “It isn’t FAIR that YOU got to have fun and I didn’t! Especially if you were not going to put out when I got back! If you did not want to have sex, why did you tease me??!”

“I was NOT having the time of my life on Earth! I can tell you RIGHT NOW that I can count on one hand how many orgasms I’ve had since I saw you last. Only ONE of those times involved anyone other than myself, and besides, I AM going to put out! I do wanna fuck you, I just wanted to say hi first!”
“I….I am just REALLY pent up and need you really badly right now and everything has gone to total shit tonight and I do not know how to DEAL!!!” Edon said. Tears of frustration pricked at the corners of its eyes, as it realized that maybe it was kind of being an asshole right now. “… I am doing the thing again, aren’t I…?”
“The thing where you’re already having a bad time dealing with a lot of highly emotional shit, and then on top of that you get so horny that you start crying, and then yell at anyone who gets too close because you’re too overwhelmed to figure out that what you really need is an orgasm, a snack, and a nap?”
“Yes… and… I am sorry.” It said, voice shaking. It was really trying to work on that.
“It’s okay. I forgive you, and I’m here now, alright?” Ezekiel said, giving Edon another hug. The Throne melted into his touch this time, accepting his display of affection. “C’mon, let’s get you all taken care of, hmm? Let’s get you some more chocolate milk, we’ll go find an empty room, and you can see how fucking WET I’ve been for you this entire goddamn month.” Edon really seemed to like that idea, getting much closer to Ezekiel and kind of rubbing itself against him, making that low rumbling / gear grinding sound. “Fuck, I really missed you, buddy…”

“I-I missed you too…” It said. “The Ophanim shelves are so cold and dark. I was miserable in there, and Arseni’s bed could be a… difficult sleeping situation…”

“Oh, you poor baby…” Ezekiel replied, leading the Throne to another table around the corner that he was pretty sure would have drinks. “The blanket pile wasn’t the same without you. You’re so warm, I was so used to not even needing a blanket over top of me. You know the fucking fireplace doesn’t heat the chapel evenly, so most nights it’s just freezing cold. Not as bad as sleeping in my car, but, Christ, I did shed actual tears one night when Isaiah wouldn’t let me sleep next to him and Aethriel. It was like thirty degrees where I was sleeping.” He complained. “I just burrowed into the pile and tried to be happy about it.”

“What about Toby? Or Baraqiel?” Edon asked. It only just now started to think how this might have been for Ezekiel.

“Toby was in Hell that night, and also would have told me to fuck off anyway, and Baraqiel… I don’t know what the FUCK is going on with him recently, but he’s just been enjoying watching me suffer and I didn’t even want to bother with his bullshit.” Ezekiel explained.

“It was difficult coming back to Arseni, too.” Edon said. “But the shelves… oh, I forgot how closed of a space they were. I tried just to close my eyes and bear it but… I felt completely smothered and trapped. I could not sleep at all. The other Ophanim were so confused. I have no idea how I ever slept in there. I truly had no choice.”

“I thought you and Arseni were fucking?” Ezekiel asked, “Wasn't it nice to stay in its bed?”

“Arseni spreads ALL the way out when it sleeps, it will either tangle you up in all its limbs and wings and smother you just as badly as the shelves, or push you out of the bed entirely. It would not be so bad if I were similar in shape to a virtue, but, most nights I was being worn like a complicated bracelet…” It explained. “Besides, that angel is a DEEP sleeper and will NOT wake up for anything. And our rut cycles run around the same time… oh, Ezekiel, I suffered through TWO ruts with that bastard, it would hold me so close in bed and practically grind on me, ASLEEP, NOT caring or sometimes even aware that I was awake… I had to lay there and take it and resist with all my willpower…”

“I don't see what you're complaining about, man, that sounds like a wet dream to me.” He said, popping a shrimp into his mouth. “Maybe you just prefer being the big spoon.”

“Oh, do not stand there and tell me you would STAY asleep, naked, with your ass pressed against me directly while I was in rut.” Edon said.

“No, but I'd do THIS.” He unbuttoned his cargo shorts and unzipped them, awkwardly stepping through them, boots still on. Edon watched almost in disbelief as he folded them up and draped them over his arm. “I was meaning to ask anyway, what do you think of these?” He gestured to the panties he was wearing, pulling up the bottom edge of his too-big hoodie to show them off and doing a little 360. They were those same panties he was talking about over the phone all those weeks ago, the light purple ones that said FAITH on the ass. Edon hadn't thought they'd be so slutty looking!! Worse than his normal stuff! When the angel didn't verbally respond fast enough, Ezekiel giggled at it and hopped up on the table with all the food, pushed some dishes to the side, put a boot up on the table and slowly, carefully, DELICATELY pulled back the gusset, revealing his very wet cunt.
“No? Don't like em? How about now? Look better like this?”

“T-they definitely look better like THAT.” It said, getting closer and pushing his legs a bit further apart. “Christ, you're SOAKED…”

“Yeah, well, I haven't been fucked in a month and I've spent the past several hours watching people have hot sex while I just sit here and wait for you to come back.” He said, watching in amusement and excitement as Edon’s cock slid out of its sheath. “I wasn’t LYING when I said I missed you!!!”

“We are not going to make it back to a room,” Edon commented, shoving a wheel between his thighs.

“After the way you were talking before, I had little hope that we would…!” He said, as Edon moved forward, held his thighs wider apart and got a good taste of his cunt. It had REALLY missed this, and fuck, this was a GOOD re-introduction. It could feel Ezekiel throbbing against its tongue as it licked him down there. Ezekiel usually got pretty damn wet, but seldom did he get THIS wet. This was very much a side effect of not having cum at all in two weeks + being USED to cumming multiple times a day prior to that. Edon could TELL he was aching for it and couldn’t believe how lucky it was to have gotten to Ezekiel FIRST.
“How… the fuck… did anyone… stay out of you…???” It asked, gripping his thighs and pulling them up and back, pressing him down to the table and forcing him to swivel and move more plates out of the way so he didn't get cake or shrimp or pasta in his hair. “Fuck, you taste good, I need to be inside you, I need you so bad,”

“Then go ahead and-!” He cut himself off with a soft moan as Edon tried its hand at sucking on his clit, mirroring the actions it had taken with those two Cherubim in Arseni’s rooms a few hours ago. It was much more difficult like this, he was a lot smaller than them. “Put it in…! I don’t wanna wait either!”

“I don’t want to stop tasting you,” It admitted, trying its best to take its mouth off of his pussy to say that. The eye directly above the mouth that had been doing it stayed TRAINED on his sex. That almost broke its concentration, staring at his wet, soft, pink little pussy, now twitching softly with arousal and excitement from all the stimulation. It was like his body was beckoning it back down there. It did not want to stop, not at all.

“You don’t have to,” Ezekiel said, spreading his pussy lips apart and showing a little more hole. “Once you’re all done knotting me, I mean, someone is gonna have to clean up the mess you’ve made, right?”
“...” The angel stared, rotating its wheel again to make room for its cock.
“There you go, THAT got you!” He said, shifting his hips. “C’mon, please, put it in!” Edon still hesitated. He looked delectable like this, so wet, so aroused, so EAGER, begging for its cock like this. This was more along the lines of what it had expected when it got back to Earth, and it was ENJOYING the sight. It hesitated only a second longer, committing the sight to memory as best it could, before its resolve broke. It grabbed him and sank inside of him, unable to resist. It had to hold onto the table to steady itself as it pushed past the tightness of his entrance again like it was the very first time, fighting to stay upright. He was the perfect mix of wet and warm and tight, just like the angel remembered and had been fantasizing about…
“Ohhhh, FUCK….”
“Fffuckkk, you really missed me, huh?” He asked, adjusting to the fullness as best he could. The angel couldn’t help but start thrusting right away, fucking as deep into him as it could, getting a good hold on his legs and moving them around to its liking until it found a spot for them that allowed it to get a little bit deeper…
“Oh, you have no idea….” Edon said.
Ezekiel held up his arms and pulled himself up a little bit, trying to beckon the angel forwards so they could kiss. He pressed his mouth to the angel’s wheel, and soon enough, Edon allowed him entry, very much enjoying the feeling of his much smaller tongue in its mouth rather than Arseni’s much bigger one, and enjoying even more how Ezekiel choked when it put its tongue into his mouth. They made out almost more lewdly than they were fucking, which, might I remind you, was in public, on a buffet table, at a stadium full of people. There was a soft little ‘smack’ sound every time Edon bottomed out as its body slammed against the humans’.
They were getting looks. Ezekiel didn’t care, and Edon didn’t notice OR care. The angel lifted his hips and repositioned him a few times, aiming for maximum closeness as it bred him, hitting the very back of him and grabbing his ass like there was no tomorrow.
“Oh, fuck, ego vos desiderabat,” Edon cried, emotions starting to show themselves as it really melted into Ezekiel’s presence. It was realizing how scared it had been in Heaven, all these years but especially these past few weeks. “Volo esse prope te, do not let me go!!”
“I’m not gonna let you go, adsum, okay? I’m not gonna let you go. I got you.” He promised, despite very much being the one being held up right now.
“I thought I, oh, I thought I was going to die up there without ever seeing you again, I thought, fuck, how fucking CRUEL the world is that I would get a taste of heaven, and be ripped from it…” Edon said, tears beginning to roll down its wheels freely, finally allowing them to fall after trying to hide its fear for so long.
“That isn’t gonna happen anymore, never, okay?” Ezekiel promised. “Nunc domi es, you don’t have to leave again. No more heaven.”
“Arctius tenere me,” It cried, and Ezekiel did, holding it closer and continuing their making out as it continued to fuck into him. It was chasing down its orgasm with admittedly selfish intensity, and that was bringing Ezekiel closer and closer. It was so hot when Edon was desperate, and he felt so fucking WANTED right now. He kind of understood why Arseni made it beg, besides, he could just picture how nice it was gonna be to cuddle up with the angel after this session. Edon was gonna be so warm, and was probably going to want to go to sleep inserted, which is exactly what Ezekiel was planning on asking for.
“I-I’m not gonna last,” Ezekiel said, briefly breaking their kiss.
“Neither am I,” Edon admitted, holding his legs wider apart and sighing as it was able to slip a few more millimeters in, greatly affected by the feeling of more perfect contact with its favorite human’s cervix. “Can, ohh, please, can I cum past your valve?”
“What?”
“Y-your valve, the one that, oh, fuck, it leads to your womb…?”
“You mean my CERVIX?” Ezekiel asked. “What kind of fuckin’ hentai have you been watching in Heaven?! It doesn’t work like that!”
“Yeah it does!!!” The angel insisted, “Arseni told me!”
“Arseni has NO idea what it’s talking about-!” He said, cumming hard around the angel’s cock as it pushed in as deep as it could, knotting him, tying them together as tightly as it possibly could. This was a very good tie, and cum was definitely getting inside the human’s womb despite his cervix obviously staying just as closed as it always was. Edon’s mind went blank and even more tears rolled down its wheels as Ezekiel moaned into its mouth and kept making out with it as they came together. A little bit of cum leaked out around the edges of his pussy as the angel pumped him full, shifting its body a bit to try as hard as it could to push past the human’s obviously unmoving cervix. Ezekiel pulled his hips back a little to prevent it from putting that much pressure on him, as it was kind of hurting a little bit. Within five minutes, the angel was done actually cumming, but that knot wasn’t going anywhere.
“I missed you so much…” It said again, holding him tightly.
“I missed you too…”
“I do not want to part from you again tonight, any time soon.”
“Me neither.” They shared a softer kiss than the ones they’d shared previously this night.
“...Will you let me cum inside your womb when we go for round two?” It asked, holding him so he couldn’t make direct eye contact.
“No!!” Ezekiel laughed.
“Come on!” It said, a little frustrated, “You can’t even get pregnant!”
“The cervix on a human doesn’t just OPEN!” Ezekiel explained. “It only opens during childbirth!!”
“ONE of you has to be wrong…” Edon muttered, for some reason still very confused.
“Okay, alright. Where the fuck is Arseni, I need to ask it what the hell it told you up there!” Ezekiel said, giggling. He gave it a little kiss above the closest eye he could reach, which Edon closed for a second to allow him to do more comfortably.
“I-I don’t know, its grace said it was staying back to tie things together, or something…”
“Didn’t it come down with you!?” Ezekiel asked, concerned.
“....No…”
“Has anyone SEEN it?!?!?”
“I… I don’t know.”
“Did it say literally that it was tying things together? WAIT!! Did it say ‘tying up loose ends’?!?!”
“Yes, that is what it said.”
“...Oh, shit.”

+++

Isaiah hit the switch to open up the portal to hell as soon as Hermani let him know they were going to need more medical beds. Pandemonium had a hospital, and the measly twenty beds Isaiah had anticipated a need for was just not enough for the amount of fall injuries that were coming in. Besides, the addition of thousands of angels to an already pretty crowded rave was beginning to cause issues. People were getting in fistfights. Angels were tearing each other’s limbs off. Some of the music being produced by the Seraphim (who’d been allowed to use the sound equipment at a few different stations, Aethriel’s idea,) was ungodly in an actually bad way, like, the song playing right now was choral singing set to the most intense drum solo Isaiah had ever heard, and the one before that had a seven minute long graphic description of a man being drawn and quartered for stealing from the king as what could, I guess, technically qualify as a rap verse. That song had been titled “Summer of 1269”.
The portal opened up into Pandemonium’s big concert hall, where there was already a huge banner reading “WELCOME TO HELL.” The vibes in this place were very “rave in a cave.” There were hot tubs and hammocks and open bars and tables with bongs sat on top of them, and dance floors, and poles, and, fuck, Isaiah was just tired. He didn’t wanna keep doing this, Jesus Christ, it was like 2:30 am. He sighed and rolled over to the next room, knocked on the door and waited. And waited some more. And finally, Toby rolled his ass out of bed and opened it.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m up, I’m up! What!”
“You’re up, night shifter. I’m fucking tired.” He said. “Portal’s open. Edon’s down here and it’s safe, I don’t know where Arseni is but I assume it’s balls deep in something by now and forgot to check in with us, tons of the fallen angels are injured and being moved into the portal now to get to the Pandemonium Hospital, which is apparently a thing, I guess. Ezekiel is still awake, so, go talk to him if you need anything.”
“Woah woah, hey, wait a second, where’s Asmodeus?” Toby asked.
“I dunno, probably in Hell, or something, I don’t keep track of that guy. Just… if you see Aethriel, tell it I’m in here and I’m safe.”
“How’s the forcefield holding up?”
“Good. Most of the fighting is over, Gadreel’s cannons worked really well, Azazel and him work amazing as a team. They’re still up there on the turrets.”
“And the party?”
“Still going strong. This shit isn’t over on Earth until 5 am, then the humans get kicked out unless they’re in divine company, and everything moves into Hell for whatever they’ve got in store for Christmas Day.”
“Okay… cool. So, what’s my job again?”
“Just make sure nothing fucked up happens, and answer your phone if someone calls it and do what they tell you. There’s a control panel up here for the lighting, for the hell portal, the sound system… you can make announcements… Just don’t get super drunk, super high, or have sex so passionately that you can’t do your job. Those are basically the only rules. We brailled the keys on the panel so you can tell the difference and what they do.”
“Yeah, yeah, great, cool, whatever… go to bed.” Toby said, making his way over to the control panel chair. He remembered from earlier that it reclined all the way back and had plenty of room…
“Okay. I’m trusting you with this. Make sure the portal stays at nominal temperature. Make sure-”
“Got it. Go to bed!” He insisted. Isaiah sighed and did so, going into the room adjacent to this one, closing and locking the door.
About five minutes into his shift, he got a phone call.
“Go for Toby,” He said, “Who the fuck is this?”
“It’s Ezekiel,” He said, “Is Isaiah already asleep? Uh, okay, um… do you know if anyone’s seen Arseni? Edon told me it apparently stayed back in Heaven to ‘grab something’ and we’re worried about it. We tried calling and it didn’t pick up.”
“Uh… no, I don’t think so. Um… let me call it, see if it picks up. I’ll call you back okay?”
“Okay. Thanks man. Me and Edon are gonna go to Hell, so, signal might be bad. Do you and Asmodeus have a handle on it, topside? Penemue, Kasdeya, and Daniel are all up there too, if you need anything. I think Beelzebub should be up there soon, too, he’s taking over for Lucifer as soon as he goes back to Hell.”
“Oh, yeah, of course, everything is fine...” He said. “Call ya back.” He picked up the landline phone they’d set up specifically for this purpose, calling numbers that might be unreachable due to bad signals in heaven and hell. He dialed the number, which Isaiah had made him memorize beforehand. It rang for a LONG time, and just before Toby gave up and put down the receiver, someone picked up. “HEY! Arseni, bud, where they FUCK are you? We’re all looking for you down here! Party’s almost over!”
“...Sarah?” Came a very familiar voice on the other end of the line. Toby’s heart dropped to his stomach. “Oh, this is TOO good!”
“What… what the fuck? How did you… I thought…”
“Oh, no, my darling, you called the right number, this is Arseni’s phone. It’s a bit busy right now, though, got a bit, well… tied up, shall we put it, in Heaven. Some of my best work, really.” Toby could hear muffled screams in the background. “But, I have plenty of time to catch up with you. How is life, now? I will admit, I lost track of you a few years ago, how have things been, since I saved you from yourself?”
“The FUCK did you do with Arseni?!” Toby asked.
“Oh, don’t worry your pretty little head, Sarah. It’ll go on trial soon, really just a formality. It’s going to be destroyed, with the rest of the vile perverts ruining our beautiful universe.”
“...Well… is there an APPEALS process??!?!? Does it have a lawyer??” Toby asked, not really sure what to do at this point.
“Sarah, darling, please, really, don’t worry about it… I assume you’re working with the devil, now, hm, considering where you are calling from? The caller ID says ‘hellphone’. If that’s the case, your soul may not be salvageable. But your body is. You may not be able to make things right with God, but you can still try and make things right with ME.” He really DID sound like Azariah. Baraqiel had been right. He took a deep breath and tried to swallow his pride for a second. “I really am your best option. When you die, I will advocate for you.”
“What can I do right now to get you to give Arseni a lawyer?” He asked, ignoring the stupid bullshit promise of salvation in exchange for his mortal body.
“It doesn’t work like that.” Raphael responded. “There are no lawyers in heaven.”
“How DOES it work??!” Toby asked, trying to swallow the vomit coming up in his throat.
“How about I come to you and we have a little conversation about it, hmm?” Raphael said. Toby almost choked. “I'm willing to hear you out, negotiate something…”
“...Um… can… I get back to you on that one…” He managed to say, dialing another number on his cell phone and hoping to Satan that the recipient would pick up. This was going to be a long shift…
“I'll be waiting by the phone.”
“Pick up, pick up!!!” He cursed the shitty signal in Hell and redialed Lucifer’s number. He couldn't get ahold of Beelzebub either, which was concerning, as those two Satans were kind of needed more than anyone else right now.
“Toby, I am off the hook. Stop calling me!” Lucifer said, “Beelz should be up there… I'm trying to enjoy my party, here.”
“Beelzebub isn't picking up and Arseni got captured in Heaven!!” Tony said. “It's being held by Raphael, I know this for a fact, I have the transcripts pulled already from the HellPhone. He wants to negotiate. With… with me.” He said.
“...Are you fucking kidding me… okay. Alright. Uh… let's… let's talk to Azazel. Emergency meeting. We'll come up to the control room, stay where you are.”
“Can you get Asmodeus, too?” Toby asked, head in his hands. “I… I don't wanna do this without him.”
“Woah, cool it… cool it… you're gonna be okay.” The demon lord said, noticing how freaked out Toby sounded. “But yes, I'll try and find him. Nobody is gonna make you, a random human, negotiate with an Archangel alone, directly.”
“You might not have a choice.” He said, sighing. “I… have a HISTORY with Raphael.”
“Hate to say this kid, but, who doesn't?” He replied.
“No, like… he tried to marry me. He stalked me for years. I escaped a high security mental hospital after I shot a guy that… uh… well.. I thought it was Raphael. I was wrong. But I shot him. That's how I got here. That's how I got involved in all this. He's gonna want ME, Lucifer, I'm the fucking bargaining chip.”
The emergency meeting went as such: Azazel, Beelzebub, Asmodeus, and Lucifer all came to the control panel room and sat there while Toby called Arseni’s phone, planning to listen in and feed him lines.
“Calling back so soon?” Came the voice on the end of the line.
“Yeah… I… I missed you.” Toby said.
“You don't want this Cherub anymore, then?”
“NO!! Yes!!! I mean, I do want Arseni back!” He said. “Send it down to Earth. It's got warrants out for arrest in Hell, they predate your charges.” He explained.
“I won't be doing that.” He said. “Hell has no authority over Heavenly jurisdictions. My court, or, Heaven's Court, rules over all.”
“But aren't you going to send it to Hell anyway? Why not cut out the middle man?”
“I am the middle man.” The archangel replied. “Listen. Cut the act. I know you are surrounded by the best and brightest of Hell right now, I'm not a fucking idiot. Put Azazel on the phone.” Azazel looked at him, shaking his head and doing a head cutting off motion with a hand. Asmodeus hit him, and he remembered, oh, yeah, Toby’s blind. He instead whisper shouted
“PRETEND YOU DON'T KNOW ME” As quietly as he felt he could for comprehension.
“I have no idea what you're talking about, I've never even met Azazel.” Toby lied.
“You absolutely have. Otherwise you wouldn't even know about Arseni’s charges from Hell.”
“Anyone who knows Arseni knows it can't keep a secret.” Toby pointed out.
“Yet clearly it can lie like a BITCH, commit horrifically vile acts, and make ME look fucking incompetent.” The archangel said. “I will not lie to you, very few things are worth more to me now than making sure this vile creature dies a slow, painful death at my hand. Whatever your offer is for extradition, it is going to have to be pretty good.” Toby looked over at the demons, at a loss for what to say. Asmodeus was frantically hitting keys on the brailler they'd thankfully left out from when they were labelling the keys on the control panel, and slid Toby a piece of paper which he read as quickly as he could, ad libbing until he got the message.
“Uh, well, here's the thing, Raphael… and I know you know this, and you know I know you know this…y'know, you ain't so perfect yourself. If that case goes to trial, it's gonna talk ALL about your ass on the stand. If it has nothing left to lose, your ass is on the line.”
“It will not speak on the stand. It would never be allowed.”
“Tensions will already be high in heaven now, after that fall, would they not?” Toby countered. “How would you like a sham trial where the accused cannot even speak, especially when the accused is a highly popular, powerful, important socialite with a vast social network and relative infamy, who is also known to be one of YOUR close associates? Even if it says nothing, even if it pleads guilty, you will be called into question, I mean, how could you not KNOW about all the shit it was doing? It's a direct report to you. It has countless documented, hours long meetings in YOUR office on YOUR report sheets. I can't imagine it was ever subtle.”
“...So you are threatening me?” The archangel said. “That is not a good look for the submissive wife of a highly respected archangel.”
“I'm not your FUCKIN wife!!!! Shut the fuck up!” He said. Azazel put his head in his hands.
“That is what I'm asking. You marry me, and Arseni can have its extradition.”
“How about you go fuck yourself!”
“Oh, I won't have to.” The angel replied. “Call me back when you have a better attitude.” The line went dead.

+++ARTWORK+++

I tried guys. here's my art. 

Chapter Text

HUGE TRIGGER WARNING ATTACHED TO THIS CHAPTER FOR REFERENCES TO GROOMING. Also cannibalism. To be very clear: There is nothing graphic here. This chapter was written in pieces a good while ago as a coping mechanism for dealing with Not Great Memories, and I mean, if you couldn’t tell that this work is full of shit like that already… well… I mean. Maybe be smarter. I guess. Because nobody sits down to write more than 300 pages of bible related fanfiction without some kind of mental problem or trauma. IF YOU DON’T WANT TO READ THAT, THERE WILL BE A SUMMARY AT THE END OF ALL THE LORE STUFF.

It did not take long for Raphael to break down the door to Arseni’s bedroom. He was very surprised to see that the Cherub was actually still there, sitting on its VERY out of regulation bed in that RIDICULOUS party dress. It had flowing sleeves of deep vermillion and featured a very low cut neck, two ridiculously high side slits, and gold accents. 

“I could have sworn I didn’t invite you,” It said. 

“What is this?!” Raphael said, gesturing to the other angel who was still sitting on the bed. “What are you DOING in here? What’s your angle, why are you not fleeing, like the rest? I surely hope you do not ACTUALLY think you could SEDUCE your way out of this one?”

“I just wanted to say goodbye.” It said. “I won’t be seeing you again for quite a while, I suppose, after tonight.”

“So you think you can fight me?” Raphael asked, incredulous. He took a step towards the other angel, spreading his much larger wings, showing off how much smaller Arseni was compared to him. Raphael was a very, VERY tall Cherub, and Arseni was SO small that as a juvenile, it had been tested to make sure that it was ACTUALLY all Cherub. There had been suspicion that its mother had been sleeping around with Virtues, which… was probably true, but, no, Arseni was 100% Cherubim. Just really short. “That is what this stupid little showdown is about? Your pride? Some misplaced sense of righteousness? Revenge?”

“It's about tying up loose ends.” It said, reaching between its cleavage, drawing and pulling out its gun, pointing it directly at the archangel and firing three shots in quick succession. One hit him in the shoulder, another grazed the ear on his ox head, and the other missed entirely as he ducked out of the way. Arseni knew it had fucked up the second its first shot didn't connect with his forehead; it only had four bullets and would have needed all of them to put this fucker down. It would have to make the last one count.

 The Archangel held a few astral hands over the bleeding in his shoulder, drawing his bladed whip with the other arm, and striking, missing the lesser Cherub as it dropped to the floor and instead destroying one of the posts on its bed. It quickly lit the pile of documents it had under its bed on fire, which quickly became a larger fire, getting a little out of control as anticipated, making visibility in the room very poor.

“I will make you WISH I killed you more PAINLESSLY, YEARS ago!!!” The whip cracked again, this time catching parts of its dress and tearing the fabric from it to the point where the gown was unmendable and ruined.

The last shot it fired hit the archangel in the lower abdomen, just a few inches above his left thigh. This too was not what it was aiming for, although it got pretty close. It cursed itself for ignoring Azazel’s warning about not getting too fucked up; it was usually at least a decent shot, and… well… this was not only embarrassing, but, it was quickly starting to realize that it may be its downfall. Raphael struck a third time with the lash, which wrapped itself around Arseni’s shoulder and chest and dragged it towards himself as if it weighed nothing. 

“I have said this to you many times, little dove,” He said, “You are a lot of things, but most of all, you are STUPID…”

He seemed like a nice man. He was always so professional looking, in his button down shirts and that lab coat. He looked like, well, a doctor, and he was a doctor, so, that checked out. At first, Sarah looked forward to Dad inviting Azariah over for dinner; once the adults were done talking, Azariah would speak with him, and, he felt like Azariah really respected his opinions, at least more than Dad did! He always seemed so interested, and asked all these questions, and gave advice that usually ended up working. I mean, those girls WERE rude, why should he want to be friends with any of them OR any of the other kids? Ignoring their words really did work pretty well, besides, who needs friends your age, anyway? Other kids are stupid and immature. Azariah said it was a sign of intelligence and maturity to only have a few kid friends, especially if you can be friends with adults. Sarah had been too embarrassed to tell him that Azariah was pretty much his only friend, now.

After a few months, Azariah’s visits got to be even BETTER, because he’d bring gifts! First, he brought snacks, like candy and sweets, but soon enough the gifts escalated into things like a little necklace, for Sarah’s birthday, no matter that the gift was given three months after his actual birthday. He’d mentioned the visit prior that he had been disappointed that Dad didn’t let him go to the aquarium with the other kids for that field trip, and Azariah had remembered! He’d brought him a little pendant with a cross and a fish, made from actual, real silver. He wore that thing constantly, it was the only jewelry he didn’t hate having to wear. Azariah said it looked good on him.

“I can’t do it, and I WON’T.” Toby said, crossing his arms. “NOT alone, not EVER. If I am to see that fucker in person, it will be under ARMED GUARD, you hear me? ARMED GUARD, at least six non-humans with weaponry enough to take out an Archangel, I’m talking cannons, I’m talking guns, I’m talking fifteen feet of distance between us MINIMUM.” 

“It would only be for like, a few hours.” Azazel said. “Trust me, NONE of us like the guy. He got pretty damn close to torturing me to death on multiple occasions.”

“NO. And if you try to make me, I’ll kill myself.” He turned his head away.

“You’re impossible!” He argued, “You have to be willing to make SOME sacrifices, here!”

“I’m sorry, is my eyesight not enough?!” 

“What if it’s in public?” Lucifer suggested. “What if we had it happen at some huge, public event, some big deal, televised event where he can’t try any shit because there’s cameras rolling and he’d be forced to be in human form?”

“Like WHAT?!” Toby asked, “What, like, you're gonna have me go meet up casually with a known armed and dangerous ultra powerful being at the motherfucking presidential inauguration?! Just because he ASKED you to? Why are WE giving in to HIS demands?!” 

“Because this is a pretty easy demand to give in to, and it works really well in our favor.” Beelzebub replied. “We know it is likely not being held in any official capacity. Heavenly authorities are probably still looking for it and don't know where it is, Raphael is afraid this is going to be his undoing, too. We are going to try and reach out to our heavenly contacts to see if they can go and find the poor bastard while Raphael is distracted.”

“That's the stupidest goddamn thing I've ever heard in my life!” Toby exclaimed. 

“And, I know this is a long shot,” He continued, “but, would you be willing to wear something like… a nice dress? Like a professional one, something you could go to a business meeting in?”

“That's it. I'm killing myself. Fuck you guys. I can't believe I ever agreed to help any of you. I can't believe I slept under the same roof as you, I can't believe I ever thought this place was SAFE, YOU BASTARDS WERE JUST GOING TO THROW ME TO THE WOLVES THIS ENTIRE FUCKING TIME!!! And now I CAN'T FUCKING ESCAPE IT, I can't get away from you motherfuckers no matter how far I run. Either you'll find me or he will.” He stood up from his chair. “I'd rather die."

 “What do you mean, it’s too girly? You’re a girl! You’re a young woman, now, even! You don't think you want to be a boy, do you?” He'd asked. Sarah looked away. He had refused the latest gift Azariah had brought, a formal dress that his Dad would NEVER let him wear because it looked like the stuff that non-religious girls wore, and tried to be polite about it. The little silver cross earrings, last visit, he’d accepted and just pretended to like, because Azariah seemed excited about the prospect of him owning them. He’d put them in the back of his closet somewhere Dad wouldn’t see and make him wear them to church, or something. But this was too much. He hated fancy clothes, and he hated dresses. He liked his jeans and long sleeves.

“I…” His gaze turned critical, and Sarah really, really didn't want to say the wrong thing, here. “I…um… I don't know. I… I think I do. I would much rather be a boy.”

“You’re not a boy.” Azariah said. “You don't even really WANT to be a boy. Boys and girls are very different, God made them that way for a reason. You wouldn't be able to handle it, being a boy, that is. No girl would.” 

“Yeah I could!” Sarah replied, defensive, now. Azariah sighed. 

“You need to drop this stupid little act.” He said. 

“Why?!”

“Because I do not enjoy speaking to those who are immature.” He said. “This delusion of yours is immature, it is childish. You are a young woman now. You need to act like it. You don’t want to lose me as a friend, do you?” 

Toby had been extremely upset when he'd not been allowed to leave the room after saying that. He'd kicked and screamed and bit and cried, but, he was a human, and these were some pretty fucking powerful demons. Asmodeus was contacted and tasked with taking him back to hell and keeping him safe from himself for a little while. 

“I'm sorry, Toby,” He said, holding onto him as non-restrictively as he could despite his struggling.

“LET GO OF ME!” He screamed, “YOU FUCKING TRAITOR PIECE OF SHIT, I HATE YOU! LET GO OF ME! LET GO OF ME, I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!!! YOU HEAR ME?” 

 “It looks… BAD.” He said, looking at himself in the dress in the mirror. “Come on, Azariah, can you just return it? Dad would never let me wear something like this anyway.”

“If you hate looking at it so much, how about you close your eyes?” Azariah asked. “I gave you a gift, you should be thankful.” Sarah sighed, trusting in Azariah and closing his eyes.

 “...It looks better with my eyes closed, I guess.” He said, mostly as a joke. He could hear Azariah's footsteps approach and stop directly behind him.

“It looks good on you.” He said.

“Now, I know it ain’t ideal, but, hey, look, we could make a little night out of it.” Asmodeus suggested, holding his arm as they walked through the streets of Pandemonium to prevent him from escaping and hurting himself. Toby had been to Hell with Asmodeus before, but mostly they’d been clubbing, and he was not very familiar with these roadways. This district had some pretty good restaurants, and Asmodeus had wanted to take him here for a while, anyway. 

“Yeah, whatever. I hope I get hit by a bus.” He replied. 

“Okay, well, how about instead of that, we go get calamari at some super expensive seafood restaurant that imports the good shit from the surface?” 

“Like, squid legs? Absolutely not.” He said. “That shit is disgusting.”

“Fine. What do you want to eat, then?” He asked.

“Cemetery dirt.” 

“Okay, alright, I can work with that, how about fast food, like, worms and gravy?”

“Is that a real thing you eat?” He asked, “This really is hell.”

“Oh, I know! Ever tried human meat? We have that. There’s a great place down the road that does rack ribs…”

In the hospital the next morning, Sarah went to emergency surgery to try and repair what was left of his retinas, and was given the news that his vision would likely never improve, and may even get worse. It happened overnight. Doctors had no idea what the fuck had caused it. They said it looked like he'd had retinal detachments for DAYS, but Sarah was adamant that he'd had NO symptoms at all. He just woke up in the morning and he couldn't see. The best guess anyone could come up with was possibly some genetic issue he inherited from his father, who also had pretty shitty vision and had a retinal detachment in the past. It probably didn't help that his parents weren't the most distant, genetically.

Sarah wasn’t so sure about all that. He had his own theory.

What little vision he did possess showed the restaurant as blurry, dark red colors on the ground, and blurry gray and black and even darker red up higher. His vision was really very bad; he had almost no central vision and only slivers of extremely blurry, largely non-usable vision around the edges. While he technically could read, it would have to be letters four inches tall or more and VERY close to his face. He could maybe read a particularly large roll of caution tape if he had it in his hands 2 inches from his face and moved it slowly, in the corner of his left eye. Over the years he’d mostly learned to ignore the vision he did have, because it made it harder to get around rather than easier. They got a booth, and Asmodeus made him share a bench with him and sit on the inside so it would be harder for him to get away. 

“I can’t fucking believe this cannibal restaurant has a braille menu.” He said, reading over the options they had here. 

“It’s not a cannibal restaurant, it’s a HUMAN restaurant. Kinda like a steakhouse.” Asmodeus said, “I mean, when I eat humans, it’s not cannibalism because I’m not a human. You’re the problem here, not me.”

“Hey, you made me come here.” He said. “I’d rather be on the table.”

“I offered two other non-cannibalistic options first.” He said. “Besides, you have to do something pretty fucked up on Earth to end up on the menu here. This IS literally Hell. We do actually torture some people.”

“What, like, murderers?” He said. “You do know I am a murderer, right? I did kill a guy like, a few months ago in a case of mistaken identity.”

“Oh, no, much worse.” He offered. Toby gave him a look. “...Or, y’know, if you piss off the wrong guy, or get involved in a deal gone wrong, or… okay, well, SOME to MOST of the meat here actually deserved it. Some of it uh… um…” Asmodeus was starting to regret taking Toby here. “Look, man, I’ve been a demon for a LONG time, I have no idea where your morality lies and you seemed pretty down for this.”

“I have no issue with eating people, as long as they’re ethically sourced.” He said. “You guys aren’t like, breeding humans down here like cattle, are you?”

“No, no, nothing like that. At least, uh… I don’t think so, not to my knowledge.” Toby shook his head. 

“Okay, so, you’re saying we could be eating like, pedophiles, OR just some guy that pissed off your line cook?” He asked. “It’s a 50/50 shot?”

“Hey, it’s not MY line cook! I don’t own this place, I just give them money!”

“How is that any better?!”

“Hey shitheads, you guys gonna order, or…?” The waiter gave them a look, then did a double take seeing Toby sitting there. “DAMN! Is that a newly fallen Virtue? I can’t BELIEVE he lost his wings and then IMMEDIATELY came HERE, wow, I am shocked, Asmodeus, you’re really pulling some freaks now!”

“I’m a human.” Toby said. 

“Oh, even BETTER! Hey, Dave! Get over here, get a load of this guy!”

“Yeah, I was told you guys do ribs, here?” He said, re-reading a part of the menu. “I’ll do that. Just, I don’t know how it works, here, but like, am I able to request you take them from someone who actually did something fucked up, or, is that like, an upcharge, or…?”

“I mean honestly man? I’m shocked you aren’t freaking out right now. Everyone here both could and would eat you.” The waiter said. A secondary demon that worked here walked up to the table at the request of the first one, looking at Toby while Asmodeus put a hand to the bridge of one of his noses. 

“Oh, he’s probably one of those weird Dahmer types.” The demon, who’s name was apparently Dave, said. “Never got one of those before?”

“I’m not into it sexually. I’m into it cathartically.” Toby explained. “You got any guys back there who were REAL pieces of shit?”

“I mean, we always do. What kind of piece of shit are you talking?”

“It’s better this way, my dove.” Azariah had said, in some grand attempt to comfort him after he was home from the hospital. “You won’t struggle with those thoughts anymore.” 

“Thoughts?!” Sarah asked, face stained with tears. 

“Those terrible thoughts about being a boy.” He said. “Now you can be a normal girl, and you will be a lovely wife for me when you get a bit older. You’ll not want to do all those things that boys do if you cannot do them, and you will have no problem wearing nice dresses if you cannot see them.” 

Asmodeus sat there in shock as Toby told the story to these two random waiters. If he’d known about THIS, he definitely would have said something during that whole ordeal back there. He hadn’t really showed up until Azazel had called him and told him Toby needed a chaperone who wasn’t involved in the prior conversation, but, still, if he’d KNOWN… All Toby had said before was that Raphael blinded him in order to get him to marry him and not transition, and that it had been years ago. He didn’t MENTION that he’d gone blind when he was NINE. 

“And then I had to go back to school, blind as shit, I had to relearn how to read, and write, and do EVERYTHING. My Dad didn’t even care, he was like, whatever, you’re gonna get married the day you turn 16 anyway, you don’t need to know this shit. That was another reason he did it, to convince Dad that it would be in my best interest to get married that young, so I wouldn’t be broke as shit and blind and homeless as an adult. Also, FUCK the Alabama legal system for making any of that LEGAL in the first place! What fucking lawmakers are making it legal for a 16 year old to get married?!?! And would you BELIEVE there are states that it's even LOWER than that?! You bet your ASS Azariah was trying to plug those places as great destinations for us to pack up and move to the whole time, also! God... I'm getting off topic..." He wiped his face with his hands. 

 "But I mean, special education coming in clutch, they taught me how to read braille. I ran away the week before I turned 16, the dude FOLLOWED me, I felt his presence EVERYWHERE. I thought it calmed down for a little while, I even got actually engaged to a different guy, we almost got married, and then, I mean. The feeling came back, what if this is Azariah playing the long game? So I shot him. I was wrong. I think they’re still investigating, but, I dunno the exact status of the case... I ran as soon as I figured out I was wrong about him. I got picked up by the cops for "odd behavior" and I thought they'd finally caught me, which just made me seem insane, so they put me in a mental hospital... I broke out and ran before they could find out the truth, was sleeping on the street on and off in another city for a few months working as a shitty DJ, then, I mean, I found some chill guys, now I’m here.

 The worst part about it is, I mean, the LAST thing I ever saw with my eyes clearly… was that motherfucker.” He concluded. “So you can probably understand why I’d rather die than hang out with the guy again. That’s why I’m here, I mean, I don’t know the rate that human meat is going for, but, I’m more than willing to be put on the menu as payment, I just want to try barbequed ribs of dead rapist before I die. How’s that sound?”

“Ignore him, please, I was specifically instructed to not let him die while he’s here. Lucifer’s orders. I’m paying, you both know I’m good for it.”

“Ignore what PART of that?!” Dave said. “Whatever. Yes, we have the ribs you want. I’m gonna… I’m gonna go get those out for you. You want something to drink too? What am I saying, of course you do. I’ll bring you some bourbon.” 

“This is the kitchen.” Ezekiel said, “Just be careful with the burner on the top left, if you need to use it only turn it on the lowest setting. Any higher and it’ll melt right through the pan.” He laughed. Toby did not laugh back. “So, um, we got an extra space in the loft, but, we also still have a ton of those office spaces open if you want a private room. Isaiah and I are still working out the logistics of getting mattresses and everything right now, though, so the loft might be more comfortable as long as you don't mind sharing with me.”

“You’re gonna die if you do that, you know.” He explained. 

“...Huh?” 

“If you let me stay here. If you try and help me. You'll die.” Toby reiterated. “Many other people have already died. My friends. My partners. Fuck, when I went to go and start testosterone, my doctor died before she could write the script. It's like a curse. You people are nice, but… I can't do that shit to you.” Toby said. 

“Wait… but you were staying at the Catholic women's shelter, right?” Ezekiel asked. “If it were really you, then, wouldn't the workers there die?”

“Every time I went to a secular shelter, people would start getting really, really sick.” Toby explained. 

“Do you have tuberculosis or something????” Isaiah asked, confused. 

“I don't know. I don't think so, but, even if I did, it wouldn't have caused my endocrinologist to get strangled to death.” Toby said. “Either way, I can't stay here. Thank you for the offer, but, I have to find somewhere else, where there's no people.” 

Ezekiel, Aethriel, and Isaiah looked at each other, and then at Toby.

“Toby,” Aethriel said, “Do you have any reason to believe you are being stalked?”

“Yeah. I do, actually, I know exactly who it is, too. His name’s Azariah.” He said. 

“I… I don’t want to freak you out or anything but, I think I know Azariah. Or like. I know about him. Um… did he ever go by a different name?” Ezekiel asked. “And uh, was he a doctor?”

“He never told me a different name. But yeah he was a doctor, he was my Dad’s fucking ophthalmologist, it was WEIRD.” Toby said, turning around. “How do you know about this?? Are you working for him?!?”

“Opposite of that. I hate the guy. Look, are you cool with talking to one of our friends? He’s got history with Azariah, too.”

“...I don’t know.” Toby said. “I mean… I really don’t think you guys understand. This is way bigger than what a bunch of fucking hippies can handle, it’s like. It’s pretty much a biblical curse.” He said. “I mean, it’s LITERALLY a biblical curse. I don’t even care if you don’t believe me, you can call the cops ALL you want, I’ll run, and I’m FAST.” He said. “And I’ll kick your asses.”

“We are not strangers to biblical curses,” Aethriel assured him, “And none of us are fond of cops. Let us call our friend, I think you will want to speak with him. Besides, we want to get confirmation that this is in fact the same person.” 

The ribs were pretty good. Tasted a lot like pork. It bothered Toby a little bit that they came from a human, but not enough to stop eating them, especially after he’d been told the atrocities this guy committed in life. The bourbon was nice, too. Asmodeus watched him like a hawk as he ate, only picking at what he’d ordered. 

“So, uh…” He said. “Raphael, huh? What a bastard.”

“What’d he do to you?” Toby asked. 

“I mean. Not much, compared to you. I mean. He taught a human how to make a chemical weapon to use against me, but, in that human’s defense, I was trying to kill him, so, you could claim that was in self defense. That human WAS trying to forcibly marry and fuck my girlfriend, though.” He explained. “I got a LOT of burns. That shit HURT, BAD, it also smelled SO nasty, just like, pure toxic chemical waste. I had to hide out overseas to recover, and Raphael still followed my ass out there to beat the shit out of me and drag me back to hell. By the time I recovered, my girlfriend was already dead. So. Not really ideal.” He said. "I think the idea behind Raphael trying to get Tobias to marry that woman so hard was because he KNEW that guy was a pussy, and he wouldn't notice or care if Raphael was getting it on with his wife behind the scenes. Poor thing, really, she rejected him countless times. The dude is fucking PREDATORY."

“Oh, so you’re like, legit, Book of Tobit Asmodeus.” He said. “I’m not gonna lie, I thought you just took that name to sound cool.”

“Are you kidding me? I know your deadname, and, I mean, your actual name is Toby, and did you not say your Mom’s name is Anna? I thought YOU were fucking with ME!!!”

“No, that’s actually my Mom’s name. Would you believe it if I told you I don’t know Dad’s legal name?” He said. “All I know is, he’s WAY older than mom, and they’re like, loosely related. Azariah pretended to be related to us, too, to try and win my Dad’s favor. It was SO fucked up. As an adult looking back, I just… I can’t believe I ever thought any of that was NORMAL. Up until I lost my vision I really thought my family was just great.” There was a long silence.

“Can I try some of the ribs?” Asmodeus asked. 

“Knock yourself out.” He said, sliding the plate over to his right.

“Yeah, definitely the same guy. That’s Raphael alright. I can’t believe he doesn’t use different fake names, he’s been using Azariah as his human name for centuries!” Baraqiel confirmed. “Hang on, hey, ASMODEUS!! HEY!! I got a guy you might wanna talk to!” The demon lord yelled. Loud rock music was playing in the background. “Yeah, it’s a human!”

“I can’t believe you guys are really here.” Toby said, partly to Baraqiel but also to the Seraph and two prophets that were surrounding him. “This is crazy. So, wait, you’re telling me this place is protected?? Azar- I mean, Raphael can’t get to me here?”

“If Raphael can get to you here, then we’re all fucked.” Baraqiel said. “I did my best on that warding spell, and I mean, if the combined powers of Lucifer, Samyaza, Azazel and a laundry list of other demons that really don’t want to get caught isn’t enough to blind Raphael’s eyes to this place, I don’t know what would be. You are good, my man.”

“...Damn. Okay! That’s… that’s… oh…” Toby said, exhausted and grateful. “I… I really can’t believe this is happening.”

“You’ll have a lot more shit to not believe real soon,” Isaiah promised. “After we take down Raphael, we’re gonna kill God.”

SUMMARY: Arseni shoots Raphael with that gun from God’s Shittiest Physician, but misses vital areas and gets itself captured. Team Hell tries to convince Toby to put a dress on and give in to Raphael’s demand to meet up in person with him, and he says absolutely not. When pressed for details he threatens suicide. A series of flashbacks establishes that when Toby was a kid, Raphael, in disguise as the human Azariah, groomed him with the intent of making him amicable to the idea of marrying him. When Toby expressed to Raphael that he had feelings of not wanting to be a girl, Raphael blinded him, with the intention of forcing him to be more feminine / not bothered by dysphoria enough to play the role of a good christian wife. Back in the present, Team Hell contacts Asmodeus to come and pick up Toby and prevent him from hurting himself. He takes Toby to a restaurant that serves humans that have committed legitimately vile acts on earth as food. Through a series of flashbacks, Toby’s initial move to the Chapel is documented in more detail. 

Chapter Text

Tahir knocked on Raphael’s office door and was surprised when his knock was actually answered. The Archangel had been making himself scarce in the last few days, understandably so. That whole party fiasco had been a DISASTER. Tahir couldn’t say that it was a huge shock to him that Arseni’s Christmas Party had gotten so out of hand, but, the fall from grace… that had been. And Arseni was still at large!

Overnight, his council had been slammed with case after case after case after case, almost all unauthorized sexual intercourse cases, all from the Christmas Party. The most serious cases were just thrown right down from heaven with no trial, just to ease the pressure on the court system, but that was making angels MAD. Why no trial? There was always a trial! Some angels no longer believed that the court system was just, especially with the fall of Metabelle. If SHE was doing those things, and sitting up on that bench still convicting and felling others for the SAME actions… How many other judges were hypocrites?!

Oh, God, and METABELLE! She had been responsible for organizing all the court dates and coordinating times and appointments and setting the schedule! And now she was GONE! Tahir never thought he’d have PREFERRED Metabelle to be around, but Jesus, this scheduling thing was HARD! He barely had a single free moment anymore, and now, he was using his only free time to go and speak with Raphael, because, well… Tahir didn’t really know what Arseni was talking about. Raphael didn’t really seem all that bad. 

 He was so much more professional and put together than Arseni, so much less crude and disrespectful. His office wasn’t full of weird sex toys, and there was no evil shower or bodily fluids everywhere. When Arseni’s office became a crime scene, Tahir had refused to be the one to go in there with a blacklight. He REALLY didn’t want to know…

That being said, Tahir may have been in the minority with that opinion. Arseni had been popular already, and Raphael going around with two visible demonic bullet wounds did not make it any less popular. If anything it made the Cherub MORE popular, its faces on wanted posters going around was attracting… less than chaste attention. And also, there were a decent number of angels who were very afraid of or had a personal vendetta against Raphael already for one reason or another. Some angels didn't even WANT Arseni to get caught. 

When he’d come to Raphael in reverence a few days ago, confessed to him what he’d done with Metabelle (leaving out all the parts about Arseni, as he REALLY did not want to explain that he’d had sex with a human. That he KNEW would be an automatic felling, there was NO appeals process for going Watcher. He also was... Less than honest about what he'd done with metabelle, claiming that he'd only THOUGHT about having sex with her, and they'd done some heavy petting, because he knew that actual sex tended to be a felling... so really, he didn't confess much at all...) and begged for forgiveness, he’d been expecting to have his position on the council removed, at the very least. Metabelle had been talking about BRAGGING about their tryst publicly, so, he was sure this was a better option than the terrible beating if not felling he’d receive if his secret got out… What he’d received was total and complete forgiveness, as well as a promise that his position would be RETAINED. 

“I see that you are truly repentant,” He’d said, “And, honestly, I do understand. You worked with her very closely, you’re early in your career… Corrupt Cherubim are always stumbling innocent little things like yourself. It is a big problem, and I am very glad you brought this up to me instead of giving up and continuing on down the path of sin. I will be having a little talk with Metabelle.” 

“...Really?!” He’d asked, “Oh, a million thanks to you, Your Grace, I am forever in your debt!” He bowed his head low. “She has bothered me for years, always touching me, always harassing me and humiliating me! I am dirt beneath your hooves, Your Grace, but, I do have some dignity! I graduated top of my class, summa cum laude out of a very difficult track in Academy, I earned my way there through hard work and diligence and she treated me like a TOY in front of everyone!” He vented. 

“Yes, I know, I see the hair.” He said. “It is a gorgeous shade of blue, you know. It matches the sky. You are a very pretty thing, really, and you must have been VERY good, for your coloration to come out looking like THAT at graduation.” Tahir looked up. Raphael towered over him, and he found himself feeling very, very similar to the way that he did sitting in Arseni’s office a few months ago. “I can see why she gravitated towards you. I am honestly shocked that no other Cherubim before her attempted to defile you.”

“...U-um…” He’d stuttered, adjusting his clothing a bit. “Thank you, Your Grace…?”

“Did you braid it like that, just for the occasion of an audience with me?” He asked, gesturing to the braid sitting around the back of his head underneath his halo. It was a style that Arseni particularly enjoyed undoing during their activities, because it wasn’t a very easy braid to undo. It really enjoyed the annoyed look he gave it when it undid the whole thing and then got cum all over his hair, and the lecture he’d give about how long it had taken to do it all up like that… Arseni just giggled at him and picked him up and offered to ‘help’ him to the shower. Tahir would be lying if he said that he really cared all that much about the hair; he kind of liked the way it looked all fucked up like that. Besides, he’d do anything for another round with that asshole right now; those gentle makeout sessions in the shower were what he LIVED for, back in the simpler time of a few weeks ago. He missed the fingers massaging nice soap into his scalp while he relaxed into the larger angel with his eyes closed, he missed back rubs and soft lips on his, he missed being carried to a nice warm bed to be cuddled with all night after taking backshots… 

“I wanted to make it look… um… professional, Your Grace.” He responded. “I did not want you to think of me as disheveled or slovenly.”

“Oh, I would never.” Raphael praised, leaning over the desk. “Look. Between you and me, I think you’re particularly suited for the role you’re in. You are truly intelligent, righteous, and steadfast. I have seen your documents, your dissenting opinions, your conviction rate, and I LIKE it. Keep up the good work, we will certainly be speaking again, soon.” He said, sitting back up. “Now, leave this place. I have things to do.”

Tahir had left in a hurry before the Archangel could change his mind. Only then did he realize how much TROUBLE he was in; Arseni was one thing, RAPHAEL was another. He couldn’t really be thinking about doing this, could he?! But Arseni had mentioned that Raphael is, quote, ‘terrible in bed’, meaning that he IS interested in that kind of thing! Wait!!! Had that been FLIRTING?!? Did he really just seduce his way out of a demotion?! 

He actually did take Arseni’s advice that night, retiring to his rooms after his little detour, keeping his head down, and falling asleep. 

“Come in!” Raphael said, opening his door wide at the sight of the nervous looking Virtue. Tahir noticed some bandages on his shoulder, with a mostly healed wound on the ear of his ox head, and that he was using one of his arms a little less than the other. “Ah, Tahir, you are EXACTLY who I wanted to see. Oh, I am certain that your day is not going much better than mine, and I think you can solve a problem for me.” Tahir entered the room, sweating bullets, EXTREMELY conflicted on how to respond to that. This was not the time of the month to use a term like “problem solving.”

“What can I do for you?” He settled on asking, quickly following it up with a “Your Grace” for good measure.

“YOU came to see ME, my dove,” The Archangel said, amused. “How about you tell me what I can do for YOU first. What issue has brought you to my office today? I assume it has something to do with the council, you guys must be SLAMMED.” 

“U-um… No, you go first.” He said, realizing that maybe he’d made a mistake. The Archangel just reminded him SO MUCH of Arseni, and… he’d had a moment of weakness. That was all. While their physical appearances were not too similar, other than that they were both Cherubim, Arseni’s voice and speech patterns sounded very similar to Raphael’s, if he smoked a LOT more weed. 

“No, I insist.” Raphael sat down behind his ridiculous desk, kicking up his hooves. 

“W-well… Your Grace… we are, ah, SLAMMED, to use your terminology,” He agreed, making this up on the spot. “And I was wondering if you could approve longer deadlines for our hearings…? We are having difficulty fitting in all the cases in the time span previously required, and, um… there are just so many of them. Could we have approval for a few more weeks of use of the holding cells in West Hell?” He requested. “It would take a lot of pressure off of us, we’d have more time to review evidence and call witnesses, the conviction rate would surely go up…”

“Tahir, that cannot possibly be what you came here for.” The Archangel said. “You did not need MY approval for that. At worst you would have needed it from Kushiel, but, his secretary’s secretary could approve that for you. Hell, YOU could approve that for you.” 

“Um… oh.” He said. “My apologies for wasting your time, Your Grace. I will take my leave-”

“No, no. Please, stay.” He said, gesturing to the chair. “Sit.” Tahir sat down. “I need something very important from you.”

“T-that is…?” He asked. 

“I assume you’re aware of the whole SITUATION with Arseni, are you not?” He asked. Tahir swallowed. 

“Oh, I am aware.” He said. 

“Yes, well, Arseni was a direct report to me. It dealt with a portion of human behavior complaints from the country of America, among other clerical things, I assume you are aware.” 

“Intimately,” He said, “It was technically my direct report, up until, um… recently.” 

“Yes, well, its position is open.” Raphael said. “And I cannot for the immortality of me find a half decent replacement for it. But then, I thought about you, and I thought, well, Tahir would be perfect for the job.” He said. “What do you say?”
“Wow, Your Grace, I… I am honored.” He said. “I… I just… the council…”

“You would keep your position on the council.” He said. “This position also comes with a huge upgrade in rooms, you would have your own space. You would also have a secretary to handle a LOT of the clerical work for you, plus a scheduler who would essentially take over the work you’re doing now to replace Metabelle… It would make your life a LOT easier. You would have much more time to yourself. You could go back and get that second degree, if you wanted to.” The Archangel suggested. “May I recommend the Temperance pathway? You would be PERFECT for it.” He smiled. “And you’d look GORGEOUS in purple.” Tahir blushed something awful. 

“I… oh…” He said, trying hard to keep his focus. “I… I’m truly honored. I accept.” He said, “Your Grace, this… this is truly something I am undeserving of.” 

“Not at all, my dove.” He said. “Oh, and, you’ll get your own office. As luck would have it, there is actually one open right next to mine, if you so desire, although I understand if you’d like to look around for something CLOSER to the Mansions-”

“Oh, no, right beside yours is perfect.” He said, cutting him off. “Your Grace. My apologies for the rudeness.”

“No, no, don’t apologise. Stay right here while I get the keys, I believe I left them in my lockbox in the archives…” He stood and exited the office, leaving Tahir alone, staring at the desk, REELING from all of that. Raphael left him there for a LONG time. A VERY long time, like, it had been thirty minutes and he still wasn’t back. Tahir sat there, still, obedient, and facing forwards, and… well… wait a second. Was that a cell phone? 

Yeah, no, that was a cell phone! Just sitting out there on his desk! Like, a human cell phone! And it had a bright pink glittery case on it, definitely not the type of thing Tahir would assume that Raphael would even want to have. It honestly seemed like something Arseni would excitedly show off to him. 

The phone rang. Tahir sat there, frozen in place, not daring to move, and allowed it to continue to ring until it went to voicemail. The ringtone just solidified Tahir’s belief that the phone belonged to Arseni; it was a clip of audio taken from some secular human song about butts. He just sat there in complete silence, allowing it to ring… finally, it stopped. He breathed a sigh of relief, and then the door swung open.

+++

“So, do you have, like, a partner?” Asmodeus asked. They’d just been sitting on the couch not doing much for a little while, waiting for the oven to be done. Toby had insisted on oven baking some salmon for the demon, who’d told him that he HATED fish and thought it all tasted nasty to the point of being nauseating, no matter how much humans liked it. Toby had managed to convince him that HIS salmon would be different, and the demon had humored him, willing to put up with this for the sake of watching him do something other than lay there depressed and listen to true crime podcasts.

“No, because every time anyone tries to have sex with me, Raphael kills my partner and calls it ‘divine justice.’” He said. 

“Wait, wait.” Asmodeus said. “TRIES to have sex with you? Meaning that you've never had sex? I heard from Ezekiel that you're pretty good with your hands!”

“Yeah, apparently that doesn't count as sex, to him, because, nobody ever dies when I finger them.” He said. “You don’t want to know how I figured THAT out.”

“DAMN! He was probably looking at your body counter up in Heaven, then, that thing only really counts genital-on-genital contact and oral. Otherwise gynecologists and midwives would be off the charts.” Asmodeus said. “Damn. Well, I hope it gives you SOME comfort to know that he was standing there fists clenched in the public archives STARING at your fuckin’ body counter, watching for the needle to tick slightly up and then immediately getting so enraged he just smited them. Like a fuckin’... What do you guys call them, incels? Yeah, like an incel. That is such batshit loser behavior.” 

“... There's a body counter, in heaven?” He asked. “And here I thought you were just gonna ask me if I was a virgin, not drop some ridiculous lore on me like that.”

“I mean there's not much to say about it. There's a body counter for every human, in Heaven. It’s in the Archives, there’s a searchable display… There's even a leaderboard. When you’re like, MAYBE and/or ABOUT to have sex, the little arrow thing slowly starts ticking up to the next number, it’s so funny to watch. Stolas and I would sit there for hours just watching the leaderboard change, we were taking bets on it and shit.”

“...I mean, I guess that’s kind of funny.” He said. “I’m just pissed I’m still like, biblically a virgin. It’s stupid, I’m 22, what the fuck am I doing having only done hand stuff? It makes me feel like I’m missing out BECAUSE of him, like he’s still… like he still has some CLAIM over me… I know it doesn’t make sense, but I really HATE that in a way, I’m still a fucking virgin because HE wanted my virginity, like it somehow…” He held a hand over his mouth, vomit coming up in his throat. “Like it somehow belongs to him.”

+++

“My apologies. I ran into some… trouble, out there,” Raphael said. He looked like he was trying HARD to keep his cool, like he was extremely upset about something he saw or heard in the Archives. “Here are the keys.” 

“I believe you got a phone call while you were gone,” Tahir said. Raphael stopped in his tracks.

“What? How could that be? I don't have a phone for anyone to call.” He claimed. His eyes fell on the cell phone on the desk. Well, shit. 

“...Of course, Your Grace.” Tahir answered, taking the keys without looking at them and putting them in his pocket. “I must have been mistaken, my apologies.” He lowered his head. 

Raphael shut and locked the office door. 

“Would you like to know whose it is?” He asked, stepping forwards. 

“... I think I already know.” He said. “Please, don't hurt me. I promise you I will tell no one. I will forget I saw anything, I-”

“Hush, hush, little dove, it's okay.” He said, “The rumors about me really aren't true. I would never hurt a soul, I'm the Physician of God, you know. And have I treated you with anything other than softness and forgiveness?”

“...No, Your Grace.” He said. “...Why do you have Arseni’s phone? When we searched the rooms we didn't find anything like that, we only confiscated a rotary phone. Nothing that modern.”

“I took it off of it myself.” He said, truthfully. “I was this close to capturing the vile creature, and it shot me. Three times. Bullets held demonic sigils and runes, it was all premeditated, must have been for YEARS… a gun like that would have had to be crafted by Azazel or Gadreel himself. I would not be surprised if that was the goal, of this party, to kill me and take my place, puppeteered behind the scenes by a demonic oligarchy.” Tahir held an extreme amount of doubt in his mind about that. The last thing Arseni wanted was to have MORE shit to do, or be closer to God.

“But… Arseni is still numbered among angels.” Tahir said. “It's still in heaven somewhere. It didn't leave with the rest. It isn't dead. It didn't defect. It's just… missing.” 

“Terrifying, isn't it?” Raphael said. “I couldn't bring myself to take the phone to evidence, knowing you'd see it and pull the transcripts and usage data… some of the things on here, they're horrific, Tahir.” The archangel said. Tahir was silent for a moment, then scoffed.

“Your Grace, I have seen worse, I assure you.” He said. “You should submit it to evidence, it will strengthen the case when we eventually find this degenerate and prosecute it. I personally reviewed the records off the rotary phone myself, everything that hadn’t been destroyed to prevent detection, anyway. I listened to and transcribed what must have been HOURS of it and its perverted Throne having…” He looked up at the Archangel for permission to speak this way, seeing only concern on his face. “...Phone sex… with some gender confused Earth harlot, who, and please pardon my language, has a thing for piss play. I would struggle to think of anything worse that could be on that device.” He concluded. He left out the part about having jerked off to some of the audio of Arseni promising Ezekiel one hell of a good time… it just reminded him a LOT of the way it used to speak to HIM. He could still hear that fucking VOICE in his mind… 

“It sent text messages and made phone calls that referenced you specifically.” Raphael said. Tahir’s heart dropped to his stomach. Tears threatened to well up in his eyes. Oh. Okay. So. This really was the end. 

“...Oh.” Was all he could bring himself to say. What was there else to say?

“Yes, horrific, really. Had I ANY idea it was planning so meticulously to seduce and defile you… oh, it would have been rotting in Hell ages ago.” He said. 

“Um… what specifically was it saying about me?” He asked. 

“Vile things, graphic things...” He said. “Desire to defile you in truly degenerate ways, involving but not limited to acts of sodomy. Honestly, most of it referred to acts of sodomy.” Tahir hoped to God that Raphael couldn’t see how fucking sweaty he was. He was both relieved that it hadn’t referenced the fact that they’d had sex already, MANY times, and also painfully desperate to read and listen to that data. Especially now that he had the keys to his own rooms.

“I really think you should submit it to evidence.” He said. “Far be it from me to tell you what to do, Your Grace, but, the preliminary trial to set charges is tomorrow. We will be reviewing evidence, if we want this Cherub prosecuted… I feel strongly that this, I mean, evidence of it clearly being a threat to even the Council members themselves…”

“Really, Tahir, you may not want to see it.” Raphael cautioned. “I simply cannot bear the thought of your mind having to be filled with those things, I pulled the transcripts and I could scarcely bear to file them in my office, where I WORK... Besides, there is already plenty of evidence, I saw the evidence locker myself. I can’t imagine what any being, angelic or not, would need THAT many sybians for… or bitter water.” He realized, disappointed, that there was no way he would be able to come up with something he could say to get the Archangel to give him access to that phone. 

“I understand. I apologise, Your Grace.” He said, lowering his head, extremely disappointed but trying hard to not show it.

“I would love to stay and talk, my dove,” Raphael said, opening a drawer in his desk and rummaging around, pulling out a satchel and putting it on, “But truly, I do need to go, now. There are… events, occurring outside of Heaven, that I must attend to.” 

“I see. Thank you again, Your Grace, I… I am more than honored for the promotion and I promise I will not fail you.”

“I know you won’t.” He said. “Your task list will be on your new desk tomorrow. Your secretary will also come and inform you of your new duties, as well. I wish you luck, Tahir.” He said, opening the office door. Tahir crossed the room and held the door for the Archangel as he exited, trying his best to show reverence. 

+++

Tahir followed the instructions to get into his new rooms, showing his shiny new entry pass to the Powers at the doors of the Mansions and feeling, admittedly, like kind of a badass taking the elevators up to the sixth floor with two Cherubim who looked shocked to see him with his OWN pass. 

He walked down the hall until he found his rooms (ROOMS!! He could barely believe it!) and tried the key in the lock… nothing. What? Maybe he was doing it wrong. He tried again. Nothing. He tried another key, thinking maybe that one was the office key. Nothing. He looked closer at the key ring, and noticed that each one was labeled. 

Office. Cabinet 1. Cabinet 2. Files 3. Archangel Mansion Front Door. Room Key. Throne Room. Archives Lockbox Module 1-3... Backroom… there were a few others, but Tahir got the picture and didn’t bother to read them. Raphael had fucked up and given him his spare keys instead of the correct ones. Great. Now he would be unable to get to his rooms until this could be rectified, he’d have to go and actually get another AUDIENCE with Raphael… which could take AGES, especially at a time like this. He would have no choice but to continue sharing with his roommate until then… WAIT! How would he get into his new office? How would he find out what his new duties were?! He was gonna get in SO much trouble. 

But, he did remember that Raphael said his keys were in the Archives Lockbox. Maybe he could just save them both the trouble and go grab them for himself, replace the spares in the lockbox, and nobody would be any the wiser. Perfect plan. He took the elevators back down and flew out to the Archives, navigating the stacks upon stacks of books and records until he reached the lockboxes. 

Raphael’s lockbox was difficult to search for. He had to use three different keys off the key ring to even access the module to search for it, and when he got to it, it took three more to open it up. 

There were a LOT of items in there. A lot of items that honestly confused Tahir more than anything. Driver’s licenses. Copies of Earth newspaper articles. Locks of human and angel hair, cut and saved in braids. Manna-soaked feathers. Torn pieces of fabric. A neatly folded professional looking dress, that looked like it would fit a human child. Cut sections of… oh, God, were those sections of HALO? How and WHY did he even have those?! He supposed they COULD, MAYBE be from halo repairs… sometimes, a section needed to be cut out and the intact edges mended… but that was so extremely rarely needed. Besides, these sections were all different sizes, they couldn’t ALL be his… Well… he is the Physician of God, maybe he does repairs for his underlings??? But the edges look so jagged, they’re like they were TORN out!!

There were, however, many, many other key rings. Tahir searched through them, unable to find the ones he was looking for. He sighed, anxiety rising, and picked up another key ring, this one labeled “Spare Drawer Keys.” He figured if the keys weren’t in here, they’d be in his office. Then he could forget all about this and go to sleep in peace, in his OWN goddamn bed… 

Nervously, he made his way all the way back to Raphael’s office. He unlocked the door and entered the dark room, closing and locking the door behind him, like that was going to do any good. He looked around, and figured he’d start in the main desk drawer, first. He unlocked it and looked inside. Oh, good, lucky him, he wouldn’t have to look any further! Raphael must have forgotten he left these in here. He picked them up, cringing at how loud they clinked together, and shoved them in his pocket. He got down from the desk and made his way to the door, reaching up with the key to unlock it… but…

His eye caught the key labeled “FILE DRAWER 1.” Raphael’s voice echoed in his head… scarcely bear to file them in his OFFICE, where he WORKED… He balled up the key in his fist. He’d already broken into the guys’ office and rummaged through his shit. How much worse could it really get, now, if he were to get caught? He stood there for a good two minutes trying to just make a decision already. 

Fuck it.

He went back to the desk and opened up a file drawer, flipping through the file headers. Most of these cases were far above his paygrade, and/or sounded boring. Yeah yeah, wars on Earth, heresy, idolatry… whatever, he wanted audio recordings of a wanted attempted assassin talking about fucking his ass! He didn’t have time for this!

He checked the next file, and the next, barely even reading the headers on most of the files, only looking for ONE name: ARSENI. It would have been great if these had been alphabetical. They were not. In his haste, he flipped past files with names that would have been really fucking concerning if he’d been paying any actual attention. Finally, he found it. Excitedly, he pulled out the papers in the file, and oh, fuck, this had been SO worth it! There were even AUDIO RECORDINGS!! He pulled out the flat square metallic object and swiped his fingers along it with one hand, trying to access the audio files and sort through what he could only assume would be party planning shit to find ones he’d be more interested in, while simultaneously flipping through the paper documents looking for the texts that were about him. 

After flipping through countless messages about wine and weed and portal transport, he finally found one that referenced him. 

Isaiah Garcia 

I> I can’t imagine you’d stayed out of his ass, why was he so freaked out at the club, if he was YOUR underling? 

A>> Oh no, pure thing, Tahir is. You have no idea how badly I wanted to bend him over my desk and just WRECK his cute little ass before I sent him out on assignment.

A>> That hair color is natural. The carpets match the drapes. Do with that knowledge what you will :)

I> Does it mean something, the hair color? I’ve never seen hair like that on an angel.

A>> It’s a status thing :) Means he graduated with top honors and proved himself top of the top in purity. Pulling a Virtue like him is LEGENDARY stuff. The BRAGGING RIGHTS alone are almost worth the danger, but, the ass? Out of this world. Gathon had a pretty little top honors Virtue himself, in his harem. His name was Miironi, Gathon would not shut up about how tight he was. It’s unfair, they are SO tight and they take it SO well, but most of them are just entirely off limits, wouldn’t even be interested if it WASN’T a sin. Miironi was a special case. He was into some KINKY shit, too.

I> Yeah, I could imagine he’d probably be tight as hell. 

A>> Tight as HEAVEN. You’ve no idea. No idea at all :) 

Tahir faltered, accidentally hitting the play button with the volume up all the way on the little recording device on the table, blasting music from the party playlist out in the office. He frantically hit buttons until it stopped, and continued reading, shifting his attention between reading and scrolling through audio files. He subtly shifted his robes a bit. 

I> What stopped you?

A>> He didn’t want it! He just wanted to be out of my office as quick as he could, poor thing probably thought he was in trouble :( 

I> I really don’t think he didn’t want it. With the way he acted at the club…

A>> He’s real nervous like that. High anxiety, that one. It means nothing. He looks all flustered even when he’s not. 

I> I could picture him on his knees for you, dude. Really, you see him again up there, I’m serious, fuck with his hair. Lean down, ruffle those little curls, tip his chin up towards you… he’d be on his knees in an instant. I know a fucking bottom when I see one. He’s probably dying to have his cute little mouth used, have you SEEN those lips?

I> They’d look gorgeous around a cock. Those lips made me SO upset I have no dick to put between them. He probably daydreams about your hands in his hair.

A>> You torture me so, at a time like this? No. Tahir is no longer on my radar, for multiple reasons :(

I> You’re telling me he’s THAT tight and ready and you’re not even willing to do a LITTLE flirting? Who am I talking to right now? It can’t possibly be Arseni.

A>> He’s a cop >:(

I> He’s a JUDGE. That’s different.

A>> What kind of anarchist are you?

I> The kind that can appreciate some ASS. 

A>> Look, it just isn’t going to happen. He’s a COP, through and through, end of story. That’s all he’ll ever be. He’d sell out ANYONE to protect his status, huge snitch, goody two shoes, square, prude. Plus he did my Throne truly dirty… 

A>> He doesn’t DESERVE this dick >:(

I> Oh, come on. If he was in front of you right now, ready and willing, you’re telling me you would turn him away? Get real. What would you do to him?

It wasn’t really a question anymore. Tahir was two days into heat, unquestionably pent up with no one to turn to after pretty much every eligible Cherub he had any chance of knowing fell, and didn’t really give a shit that Arseni didn’t like him, or how degrading this felt to be doing, or that this was the office of an Archangel. His robes were pulled up and out of the way in an instant, dick already throbbing in his hand, eyes trained on the text in front of him as he flipped the page. 

DELETED MESSAGE: A>> I want him to feel safe with me, I want him to come to me with tears in his eyes during his heat cycles and feel pleasure and relief and comfort when I pick him up and take him to bed, teasing him open and giving him the relief he desperately needs… I want him to cry and thank me when I help him out like that, I want to kiss his pretty face, rub his back, get deep in there like he needs and just… RELIEVE him of that pent up stress and need for pleasure and calm. I want to gently tease his prostate until he’s NUMB down there and has cum so many times he’s incoherent. I want him so bad. I know he wants ME so bad. It’s such a fucking shame it just wouldn’t work out. I wish he would simply see reason, and turn from his path of ‘righteousness.’

A>> I think it’s pretty clear I just want to TAKE that little twink. Hold him down. Spread him open. Fuck him until he forgets his name. That kind of thing. I want his mind empty except for thoughts of lust, I want him moaning and begging for it, I want him addicted to it.

A>> I really shouldn’t be texting this shit to you.

I> Why not? What, you think he’s gonna steal your phone and read this?

I> Stop being such a prude and roleplay with me. You know you want to.

A>> Call me. 

I> I’m in a meeting. I’ll call you when it’s over.

A>> When you say IN FRONT of me, what do you mean by that?

A>> Give me a scenario to work with, here.

I> You catch him in your office, going through your shit to try and find something of yours to jerk off to. 

That human really couldn’t have picked something less specific?! 

A>> That isn’t very realistic.

I> What, you don’t think he’d be into huffing your dirty laundry? He seems like that kind of bottom to me. Probably into pits. 

A>> As hot as that would be, I don’t exactly do my own laundry, you fucking peasant. I’m basically royalty. 

I> Whatever. If he knows anything about you, he’d know you probably have hella porn in your desk drawers. 

A>> He probably wouldn’t know that. Too innocent. I DO have a lot of pornography in my office though…

A>> Besides, he probably doesn’t masturbate. And if he did it wouldn’t be to porn, he’d be jacking it to, like, a swimwear catalog from a department store, or like, audio of eagle mating calls, or something.

I> What do you want from me!!! You asked me for a scenario, I gave you one! 

A>> Fine!

A>> I’d be like, “HEY! The fuck are you doing in here?? How’d you get in??” 

I> You suck at this.

I> He’d be so flustered, trying to shove everything back into the drawers and close them, blushing down to his collarbones, apologizing and trying to come up with some excuse. 

A>> I’d open my drawers and look at what he had out, just to see what he’s touching himself to. Is he naked? Dick out?

I> No, his clothes are on, but yeah his dick’s out. He was totally cranking it to something EMBARRASSING, too, like, something of some twink tied up getting spanked or fisted by a much bigger dude. 

I> NO, wait, how about forcefem stuff. Or HYPNOSIS.

A>> I’d tease him relentlessly about it, call him a fucking pervert, make fun of him for getting so turned on by such things. Make him watch as I flip through everything he has out and show it to him again, be like, “Wow, I can’t believe you’re such a perverted little slut.”

I> He’d be in tears. Still rock hard though, you can see that he’s struggling not to reach down and touch himself. 

Tahir was definitely not struggling with that right now. Struggling would imply some attempt to NOT touch himself. The only thing he was struggling with was keeping himself QUIET. He bit the inside of his cheek and flipped the page again.

A>> Yeah that tracks

A>> I’d grab his chin and make him look at me, flip to a page with something involving large insertion, and dangle it in front of his face. I’d be like, “You must want this SO bad. It’s pathetic, really, how ready you must be to just present yourself to the nearest dominant personality, spread those slutty little legs and let your mind go completely blank. You want that? You want this? I can give this to you, you don’t need to just look at pictures.”

I> He asks, “Aren’t I going to get in trouble?”

A>> More trouble than he’s already in for breaking into my office, rummaging through my drawers uninvited, and jerking off IN my desk chair? Come on, Isaiah, this is so unrealistic, he’d NEVER do something like that. 

… Oh, God, it’s right! What am I DOING?!  He thought. He closed the transcript folder and forced himself to stop stroking, breathing heavy as he covered himself back up and put the file away. He was about to do the same with the audio recorder, but… 

There was an audio recording that caught his eye, labeled with tags like “JOI(?)” and “defilement” and “corruption.” He really couldn’t be blamed for picking that one out, turning the volume down a little bit and hitting play. It was, for some reason, a one sided audio file, only having recorded Arseni’s side of the conversation. Tahir found himself getting a little sad realizing that the “corruption” tag probably meant that the AUDIO was corrupted, not that Arseni was talking about corruption…

-meeting finally over? Good. Yeah, I mean, other than that he’s much less of a slut than you make him out to be, that was pretty accurate. I mean, he’d never do that. He’d never break into anything, much less a Cherub’s office, he’s way too afraid of being caught. 

No, I didn’t. Okay, maybe a little bit, you pervert. No, I’M not the one asking YOU if you were jerking off! You can’t turn this back on me!

What, you jealous? Of HIM!? Come on, Isaiah, you shouldn’t be jealous of him. Unlike him, you’re actually going to get a taste of this. Yeah, you are! I mean, Ezekiel is first in line, but, there’s plenty Arseni to go around. 

Honey, I don’t bottom. NO, not at ALL, no fingers, no mouth, nothing, you’re not touching this cloaca. You can take this dick or you can get out. It really does not matter to me, I have plenty of other options. I don’t really sub, either.

Oh, yeah, you think YOU’RE dominant, hmm? I guarantee you I could break you in under an hour. Wanna bet? Oh, shut up. I could do it from HERE. That’s how good I am. Oh, don’t be such a skeptic. Come on. Shut up! 

Shut your fucking mouth. 

Tahir closed his mouth on instinct. 

Yeah, that’s right. That’s what I thought. Not so confident now, are you? Take your pants off. Show me that little cock you’re so fucking proud of. 

Tahir undid his robes again. Fuck everything. Fuck how wrong this was. He didn’t care anymore. 

That’s right. Good boy, start stroking it. Oh, wow. You’re pretty hard already. Nice angle by the way, you take pretty good nudes, for a human. 

Make it feel good while you still can. When I get my hands on you, it’s off limits, and it won’t be touched. You don’t DARE touch yourself while I’m fucking you, understand? If you’re in my bed, the only thing making you feel good is ME. You’re there for ME, you get pleasure as I get pleasure.

I’m not selfish. I’m GOOD at what I do. When I’m done with you, you’re going to be completely fucked out, cock drunk, and unable to cum another time. I don’t care how many orgasms you think you can have, I don’t care if you think you can’t cum from just penetration. You’re wrong, just like every other guy I’ve fucked has been. I do it differently. I’m going to ruin you for anyone else. You’re going to try and fuck another angel, and all you’ll be thinking about is that night with ME.

“Oh my God,” Tahir said, out loud, unable to stop himself. 

I didn’t say you could speak. What did I say earlier, not a minute ago? Shut your fucking mouth. That's a good boy. Keep touching yourself for me. Yeah, there you go. Faster.

 I don't care, do it faster. 

Do NOT disobey me. 

It was borderline uncomfortable how fast he was going, now. His hand was making truly lewd slapping sounds connecting with his body, now, and he really couldn't give less of a shit. It was like Arseni was right there speaking directly in his ear. 

You're so pathetic like this, sitting there, stroking your dick to just the thought of me. I haven't even told you what I'm going to do to you yet.

Oh, of course I am. You think you're getting out of this un-fucked? You think I'm going to let you off with a blowjob? You'd have to be really special for me to put my holy mouth anywhere near your dick. No chance, mortal.

Now, spread those legs for me.

Tahir’s legs shot apart, and he moved more of his clothing out of the way. 

I'm going to tease you open on my fingers, first. Make you fucking squirm and beg for more, I'm going to take my TIME with you. You'll be fucking yourself back on my hands and begging for my cock thirty minutes before I actually give it to you. And I'll keep fucking with your g spot, too, I'm gonna tease you RIGHT to the edge and then stop, and then right to the edge all over again. You'll be a fucking MESS. And I'm not going to be nice about it either. 

Stop touching your dick. Put a finger inside yourself. 

No, I don't care if you don't have any lube. Use spit if you have to.

Tahir spit in his hands and reached down. Oh. No. That was not gonna work, he needed something else. He was way too tight for that. He paused the recording and looked around for a second, eyes falling on the oil lamp on the wall. He'd only lit one upon entry to this office, out of some desire to keep this visit a secret. In hindsight he wasn't sure how logical of a plan that had been, really it just made the office look spookier. Either way, he pulled the nearest lamp off the wall and brought it to the desk, pouring oil over his fingers, trying desperately not to spill it everywhere. As he sat down, he froze, hearing a relatively loud CLANK sound behind the wall he removed the lamp from. He froze in place, but didn't hear anything else, so… I mean.. he just assumed it was nothing and continued. 

He slipped a finger inside himself and started the recording back up.

There you go. Get deep in there for me, reach all the way back… you must be so desperate for more already. Don't worry, my dove, soon you'll have more than you can handle instead of not enough.

Oh, yes. I'm big. 

Of course I'm bigger than Edon. 

Azazel? Oh, you must be joking. 

Stop trying to figure out how big my dick is compared to my friends and keep touching yourself. No I will NOT answer the question. 

Not right now anyway. 

Curl your fingers up towards your front. Add another one. Find that little g spot, my dove, there you go… stroke it for me. 

Tahir’s breath caught as his fingers made contact with his prostate.

Just like that. A little faster. There you go… press up and into it, curl your fingers a little more… perfect. 

See? You don't even need to use your dick at all. This is more than enough. 

Or, it will be when I get my hands on you. Except I'm much better. 

Wow, are you getting close already? That's kind of pathetic. 

Tahir made a little sound of protest, extremely embarrassing that that was kind of true. He was like 75% of the way there. 

If I were there now, you'd be more than close. You'd be begging me for permission to cum around my cock, I’d be edging you on it, getting you within milliseconds of cumming and then pulling away, again and again until you were practically in tears…

Yes, I'm that good. No, I'm not exaggerating! You're gonna fucking see, soon enough! 

Keep talking like that and I'm not going to let you cum this time, I'll make you wait until you can do it on my cock. 

You are forgiven. How close are you?

“Very,” Tahir said, out loud, answering the recording, lost in the fantasy. 

I'm going to count to ten, and you're going to cum for me. Ready? Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

He put a third finger in, trying to mimic what Arseni did to him a few weeks ago. 

Seven. Keep going, a little faster. 

Six. 

Five.

There was another THUNK sound behind the wall, a different one this time, but Tahir was… otherwise preoccupied. 

Four.

Three.

Two.

Tahir couldn't wait for the recording to hit one or zero. He pressed his fingers a little deeper, a little more in and up, and he came. Little spurts of cum shot over his chest, all over his thighs, and some of it even got on the desk chair. He continued moving his fingers, moaning softly and trying hard to stifle his sounds with a hand over his mouth, to little avail. He made a truly pathetic sight, eyes rolling back in his head, legs propped up on the desk, clothing all disheveled… the shame hadn’t fully sunk in yet. He’d been STRUGGLING through this heat up until this…

One. Zero. There you go, good boy, so patient for me, waiting for my permission. If you'd cum before that I would have to punish you.

Why are you laughing? I'll do it, you know. Punishing humans that do wrong is very much within my job description… 

…I was thinking of bending you over my lap and spanking you. Biting you, maybe-

Hey, wait, no, don't hang up-!

The recording ended there. Tahir pulled his fingers out of himself, collapsing back into the chair and wallowing in his shame for a bit. The sound behind the wall happened again.

Then again. Then another time, this time much closer together. He sat bolt upright, very much worried that somehow, someone knew he was in here. 

Then again. It was coming from somewhere near the bookshelf.

+++

Tahir traced his hands against the wall near the bookshelf, trying to figure out what the fuck that sound was. Hesitantly, he knocked on the wall, three times. It sounded oddly hollow. 

And then there were three knocks back. 

He did it again. Another three back. 

For some reason, his mind flipped over to the memory of Arseni pulling that book out on its bookshelf to reveal the shower in its office. Tahir flew up to the bookshelf and started pulling at books until he heard a CLANK sound. Some mechanism behind the wall was shifting. At this point, he was in too deep. He wanted to know. He wanted to know for SURE. 

He went back over to the oil lamp on the desk, picked it up, and replaced it in its holder, pulling it out from the wall as he did and turning it like a key in a lock… 

CLANK.

The wall opened up. 

Behind the wall was a cage, with bars made from some type of metallic alloy Tahir couldn’t identify. 

And behind the bars was Arseni. Tied, gagged, and secured to the wall with tight bindings that cut into its limbs. It looked somewhere between angry and terrified. 

Tahir had never seen Arseni look scared, before. Nervous, sure. Scared? No. Not like this. 

He took a step back, almost dropping the key ring in his hand. Arseni screamed something at him behind the gags, but he couldn’t tell what it was saying. Arseni rolled its eyes when it could tell he was having trouble understanding it, and gestured to the best of its ability to the gags themselves, moving itself as close up to the bars as it could to try and get them within untying distance. 

Not knowing what else to do, he slowly, hesitantly reached forward and untied the gag on Arseni’s ox head, the only one he could reach. The Cherub coughed and spit manna onto the floor. Tahir could see that the gag, like its bindings, had cut into its flesh on its face, leaving excoriations. 

“Tahir, I am so glad to see you,” Arseni said. “I-I’ve been here since the party. Please, unlock me, unbind me. It hurts.”

“W-what?!” Tahir said. “No! I… I can’t unlock you! I’d get in trouble!”

“...More trouble than you already are?!” Arseni said, desperately. “These walls are pretty thin, Tahir! Were you not jerking off to court evidence in Raphael’s office chair five minutes ago?!”

“YOU HEARD THAT?!” Tahir covered his mouth, taking a step back. 

“Yes!!! How could I not have!!! The desk touches the wall!” It said. “Please, I know you have the key! Please let me out of here, I’ll do anything! I’ll leave Heaven immediately, you’ll never have to see me again, no court proceedings, no nothing! I’ll fly straight to Hell! Think of it, Tahir, you don’t want to sit through a months-long trial, think of all those witnesses you’ll have to vet! It’ll be agonizing! You’d much rather do anything else, I know you hate dealing with witnesses! Besides, my destination is Hell anyway! Why not cut out the middle man!”

“I… I just don’t… I don’t understand.” Tahir said. “I don’t understand how it is that you’re here and I didn’t know about it. You said you’ve been here since the party, but Raphael would have turned you in immediately if he caught you back then...” He said. 

 “… How the fuck do you think I got away with all of this for so long in the position I am in?” Arseni said, tears welling up in its eyes. “He’s known since my Academy days. He caught me fucking one of my TAs and told me I had two choices: go to trial and lose, or be discreet next time and bend over when he told me to. Can you guess which one I chose?” 

“...The second one.” Tahir stated. 

“So, this whole party thing? It was way out of line. And he is ANGRY… Think about it, Tahir, half of Heaven thinks I already made it down to Hell, even if I am still numbered among angels. Your council will stop caring about me in a few weeks, and nobody else is looking for me. Once he’s not as busy dealing with all that… I mean… what do you think he’s going to do to me?! Because I have a pretty fucking good idea!!” Tahir was silent. “So, I say to you again: what do I have to do for you so you’ll unlock this cage and let me out? I am not  below anything.” It stated. “I will do literally anything to avoid his wrath, I will say literally anything. I will kill for you. I will give you money. I will clear your name in the Infernal Courts, I will lie for you, I will perform any sexual favor you want as many times as you want, I will tell you every secret I know. I don’t care, Tahir, but I cannot stay here. It is worse than the pit.”

“You’re lying.” He said, after a long silence. “This can’t be true. If… if it were true, you’d have told me ages ago.”

“I DID!!!” Arseni said, “I did! Did I not tell you that Raphael was dangerous! To avoid him at all costs!”

“That was not very specific!” 

“Did you want me to come out of the gates on our first hookup saying ‘oh and by the way I've been repeatedly sexually abused by an Archangel?’ That is not exactly a first date type of talk!” 

“I would have appreciated the heads up!” Tahir exclaimed. “I… I think I might have made a mistake!”
“Oh, you think so?! You really think so?!” Arseni argued, “You think!?!? Honestly, you might want to think about leaving Heaven, too! He seems pretty keen on taking your purity! The SECOND he finds out you’re not a virgin, he’s going to lose his shit!”

“Do you think he’s going to kill me?!” Tahir asked.

“I think he’s going to do to you exactly what he did to me,” The Cherub replied. “I think he’s going to blackmail you. I think he’s going to sit you down and tell you that he’ll forgive you, IF you agree to be his fucktoy on command. He’ll try and act like he’s doing you this huge favor, punishing you in HIS way instead of whatever trumped up bullshit he claims would happen to you in court or in Hell, and then, SNAP! One day, you lose your fucking halo! And chances are??? Chances fucking are??? He’s gonna blame it on me! Lord knows when he broke mine, he blamed it on Azazel!” 

“...What do I do now…?” Tahir asked, approaching the bars again. 

“I’ll tell you if you FUCKING UNLOCK ME!” Arseni said. 

“...What if I defend you in court, instead?” He asked. 

“I’m clearly not making it to court!” Arseni said. “He’s not going to turn me in because he’s a sadistic fucking psychopath! I will be here until he decides to kill me!”

“What if I can convince him to turn you in?” 

“How are you going to do that without revealing that you know about me?” It said. 

“I… I think I have an idea.” He said. 

“Tahir, little dove…” Arseni said, pleadingly, “Why must we go through this? Why can’t you just unlock the cage, untie me, and we can both escape to Earth together? We’re both totally fucked here. I give you my word that I will clear your name in front of the Infernal Court, I will lie for you, I will defend you. They like me down there.”

“Are you shitting me?! I would be in MUCH more danger in Hell!” He said. “You want to talk about dangerous sexual predators, I am certain their population is higher in Hell than in Heaven, especially considering this is ME we’re talking about!!! From what you told me, I am a high value Virtue!”

“In HEAVEN you’re a high value Virtue. In HELL, you’d be a low level demon that nobody looks at twice. An imp. You’d lose your pretty blue color and your body is going to look totally different. They call it Twink Death.” It explained. “Also, I’ve met demons that don’t fuck without a SIGNED contract, it’s actually a little much.”

“I don’t believe you.” He said. “I… I just don’t believe you. I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to believe. I… I have a job to do, Arseni…” He picked up the lamp again.

“You’re really going to betray me like this?!” It said, “You’re going to leave me here?! Just because you like your job too much?! What happened to US??? What happened to all those nights I said I’d protect you from anything, what happened to me signing off on all your fuckups and either taking the blame myself or deflecting it entirely?! I protected you! Why won’t you protect me?!”

“In my defense, you left me to be blackmailed by Metabelle!” He said.

“I’m fucking SORRY?!?!” Arseni shot back, “EXCUSE ME?! NO the fuck I did NOT! I beat the shit out of her for you! And, oh yeah, I’m sorry, but, last I checked, Metabelle is currently standing trial in HELL! NOT blackmailing you! Because of ME! Because of a party I THREW, because of MY love for you! Because even if I’m fucking upset with you, I still fucking care about what happens to you! You think I WANTED her ass at my party?!” It said, tears rolling down its cheeks as it watched him falter, but continue trying to fit the lamp back into its holder. “Please!!! Please, please don’t do this! What the FUCK is wrong with you?!?! Why are you doing what HE wants when you KNOW the sin he has committed?!?! Which one of us do you think deserves mercy?!?! Do the RIGHT FUCKING THING for ONCE in your life!!”

He hesitated. Slowly, he dropped his arms, dropping the lamp to the floor. He pulled out the key ring again and unlocked the cage. Arseni stared at him in almost complete disbelief as he undid the other gags, then got to work on the bindings. It took him a good few minutes, but he got the first one off of the Cherub’s wrist, revealing ligature wounds. It proceeded to help him undo the next three limb ties, and then the ones on its wings and around its neck. By the end of it, he was holding back sobs.

“I-I’m sorry,” Tahir said. “I’m so sorry…”

“Y-you fucking should be!!” Arseni cried, collapsing to the floor. “Y-you… I… I can’t believe you stood there and argued about your job security for so long, at the risk of me being tortured to death!! What is wrong with you!”
“I-I don’t know!! I’m sorry!!” He said, “Are you hurt?!”

“Of course I am hurt!!!” It was crying, and shaking, and felt like it was going to throw up. 

“How do I help you?!” He asked. 

“C-can you just let me rest outside of the cell for a few moments, before we fall?” It said. “I am so weak from that room… those bindings…” 

“...Fall? We are falling?” Tahir asked. “...Tonight?!”

Chapter Text

Raphael descended upon the city and searched the streets for hours, yet he was entirely unable to find any hint of the Chapel. He reached into his bag multiple times, even though each time he said it would be the last one, to look at the portable body counter he'd set to Toby. That fucking indicator just kept SLOWLY, SLOWLY trending up, now hanging out at about the halfway point.

“What the FUCK is that supposed to mean?! Is this thing broken?! It's been at 0.5 for HOURS!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING?” He sighed and shoved the object back into his satchel, resolving not to keep looking at it and just frustrating himself more. He knew where he was, GENERALLY speaking, as he knew which city he was in. 

Or did he? He pulled out a separate device and started attempting to triangulate his cellphone signal… he felt his blood boil as it came up as nothing; the guy was untraceable. It was almost like he wasn't even on Earth anymore. FUCK!!!! He threw the piece of metal to the ground, shattering it to pieces. He'd just have to continue on foot…

+++

“Nope, this still tastes like total shit.” He set down the plate and pushed it away from himself, fighting the nausea. “I'm sorry, Toby, but that is truly horrible. I don't understand why you humans eat that stuff.”

“Suit yourself, more for me.” He said, tipping the plate onto his own. “You can have the rest of the noodles if you want.” 

“I don't want to eat anything right now. That… ugh. I can't. I can't even watch you do that.” He said, cringing as Toby had no issue consuming the meat. 

“Didn't you ask if I wanted to go get seafood like, recently?” He said. 

“I… I mean… it's the only thing I know for SURE most humans like eating.” He said. “Humans love fish. They're like cats. I think.” 

“Not a lot of humans like calamari though.” He said. “At least, I don't…” 

“Right, right…” Asmodeus said. Despite being a bit disgusted by his choice of food, he couldn't tear his eyes from the man's mouth. He tore into the meat in a way that Asmodeus REALLY liked watching.  The demon couldn't get what Toby had said earlier out of his head…

I'm fucking sick of it, I don't want to be a virgin anymore. It's fucking pathetic, man… I can't believe I'm admitting this shit to you, I mean, I want to seem cool to you demons, but like… shit, I haven’t EVER been penetrated. Yeah, no, not at all, not even with my own fingers, I don’t even use tampons, because for all these fuckin’ years I've been too SCARED. It’s irrational. It’s dumb. I wish I could find someone fucking CHILL that would just take my virginity and I could get this all over with…

He'd REALLY struggled to sit there, still and unmoving, and nod his heads, pretending like he wasn't desperate to solve his little problem. Asmodeus didn't exactly care if his partners were virgins or not, but he was widely considered to be a demon of lust for a reason, and… come on. COME ON, can you blame him for wanting to just jump on top of him right then, mid traumatic story?? He could picture how the human would want it, slow and gentle, easing him into it, fuck, he wanted to feel that cherry pop…

He ate in silence for a good three minutes before raising his head up for a moment like he was going to say something, then putting it back down.

“What?” Asmodeus said.

“It's… it's stupid.” He said. 

“No, seriously, what?” The demon repeated.

“Well… I mean… I was just thinking, y'know? About what we were talking about earlier. I uh… y'know. I mean. I don't think Raphael knows where I am anymore. Even if he could, I doubt he'd even make it all the way down here to like, central Pandemonium…”

“Oh, no fucking way.” Asmodeus agreed. “We have turrets attended 24/7, they'd shoot him out of the sky.” 

“And uh… y'know. I just thought maybe… I mean… all things considered we know each other pretty well.”

“Uh huh.”

“And we both have a pretty significant history, with Raphael…”

“Yeah…”

“I was just thinking, right, about what would REALLY piss him off… like… what if… what if YOU took my virginity?” Asmodeus turned his gaze directly to the human. “Wouldn’t that be crazy?”

“I… uh… I think it would be pretty FITTING, yeah.” Asmodeus said, taking the plate in front of Toby and moving it to the side. “Poetic. Three thousand years in the making.” 

“Yeah, I mean, THAT would be crazy. Right?” Asmodeus looked at Toby, and watched as he tilted his head.

“I mean, I wouldn't call it CRAZY…” The demon thought about how long it had been since he'd taken a virginity. His mind pieced together his memories of Toby in various states of undress; once with his shirt partially off at the club because he threw up all over it and had to pull off his top layer that had been stuck to the one underneath.  It had come up just enough to show a bit of underboob, almost to the nipple. Asmodeus had to force himself to turn away, thinking that Toby was just drunk and probably didn't want him to see that… 

Once, he saw him with his ass out and a towel thrown around his shoulders and upper body, covering up his back and chest only. The second towel around his legs had slipped for a second and fallen off as he walked. He'd readjusted the towel as quickly as he could when he heard Asmodeus’s horns hit the back of the wall as he lifted his heads up way too quickly upon hearing Toby walk in. Asmodeus had been shocked he didn’t NOTICE there'd been someone else in the next room, his hearing was pretty good and the demon lord hadn't really been being quiet… he'd spent the next day and a half replaying that scenario and wondering if that was INTENTIONAL…

There were other examples, too, of partial nudity. A leg. A shoulder. His lower belly, his happy trail, a flash of armpit or collarbone… it was sporadic. But it happened more often than Asmodeus thought could possibly be a coincidence.

Especially considering that Toby was a lot different than the other humans that lived at the Chapel: Ezekiel walked around practically or actually naked all the time, he didn't give a shit at all. Isaiah usually didn't do that, but, he also didn't really give a shit about nudity and wouldn't think twice about answering the door with his clothes off. Toby on the other hand… he practically lived in his two layers of shirts + baggy jeans. Asmodeus had heard from Aethriel that he'd taken his shirt off in front of it, once, but he’d had a binder on underneath.  And Ezekiel had commented that he found it odd that Toby refused to take his pants off even when he was fingerfucking him.

As much as the demon lord loved sluts… he was CURIOUS, goddamnit… and it didn't really make sense how Toby's view of nudity seemed to change around him, just a little bit, an imperceptibly, almost overlookable little bit.

It drove him fucking insane.

“Oh yeah, yeah, of course… of course…” he said. “Um… y'know, you never showed me your bedroom.”  

“It's kinda… uh… a mess, in there.” He admitted. He felt a little bit stupid, being affected THIS much by flirting of this nature. He was a DEMON, goddamnit! A demon of LUST! How was this getting him nervous?! 

“I don't mind.” Toby said. He was playing with his hands in front of himself, like he did when he was nervous or really bored. “As long as there's not like. Open containers of food IN your bed.” Asmodeus had to think for a second if he had open containers of food in his bed right now. He was PRETTY sure he didn't. But… it was never a guarantee with him.

“Oh, no, nothing like that.” He said. “Just a lot of random shit on the floor.”

“That’s fine.” He said. “Maybe, uh. Maybe you could carry me to bed, y'know, so I don't trip.” Okay. Well. That was pretty unambiguous. 

“...So uh… you really want me to take that virginity of yours, huh?” He asked, head in his hand, trying hard to just… be PATIENT. Trying not to scare him off. 

“...Yes.” Toby answered, heart pounding. “Fuck, yes. Please. I just. I… I'm sorry but I'm probably going to need you to be really gentle….”

“You think you could maybe brush your teeth first?” He said. “If I'm gonna be inside you, I'm gonna want to kiss you. And I don't want to taste… that. On your mouth.” He pointed to the plate. 

“O-oh. Yeah. Um. Of course, yeah.” He said, standing up. “I'll… I'llgodothatnow-” He stood and shoved the chair into the table too hard, fumbling with his cane and almost tripping over his own feet trying to get up and go to the bathroom faster. Asmodeus followed the prophet out to the living room, waiting on the couch for him to return, which he did quickly. 

“Still wanna be carried?” He asked, smirking. Toby turned his face towards the floor and played with his hands. 

“Umm… yeah. I… I really really do.” He said. 

“Anything else you wanna tell me about how you want your first time to go?” He asked. “Kinks you got? Preferences? Absolute no’s?” Toby opened and then closed his mouth, turning his head. He was blushing. “Aw, it must be hard admitting all that standing in front of me like that, on display. C’mere. Get in my lap.” He offered. Toby did so, nervously approaching the couch and climbing into the demon's lap.

He was kind of similar in form to Azazel, as he was an ex-cherub, and all. Toby could feel that he was much wider set than the goat demon, though, definitely had been a bull cherub rather than a goat one. His legs were a strange mix of bovine and avian. The top half of his body, like the lower, still did have patches of fur on it, as if at one point it had been pretty much covered in fur, despite large areas of scarring on his thigh, chest, and back that disrupted the fur pattern. He no longer had his eagle head, only his human one, a sheep one, and an ox one. Toby traced his scars around to his back, where the worst of the scarring was. Two smaller arms were curled up back there, underneath his small, folded wings, which all bore scarring marks. The arms seemed melted and burned and stuck in position, which they were. His bottom set of wings were gone except for two squared off stumps, evidently he'd tried to use them and his arms to shield the top set of wings to protect them and they’d needed to be removed.

His human features were heavily distorted, having four eyes (one top set one bottom set) and that same long fur instead of hair, more bovine ears, and horns, small ones that curved a bit back. His nose wasn't very humanoid either. All in all, pretty standard for a fallen Cherub.

“...Wow. That's a LOT of scars,”  Toby commented. His fingers expertly traced the edges of the old wounds.

“And here I thought you were just feeling me up,” The demon responded, lifting the human closer and further into his lap. Toby's head now rested on the demon's chest, arms wrapped around him in some sort of embrace. The demon felt so warm… he was so comfortable, despite how fast his heart was beating.

“I'm trying to figure out what your body is like.” He said, “I’m curious…”

“Go ahead. I'm fine with it, little thing. Explore all you want. But, y'know, maybe answer my question while you do.” He said.

“Question? OH! Right, right, you asked about um… my… my preferences…” he said, pressing his face closer to the demon's chest. “Oh, shit… um… I mean. I don't really know what I… want. I don't know what I like. I mean. When I masturbate I basically just play with my clit like a normal person, but… I mean… when it comes to penetration I'm just totally lost.”

“So you want me to decide for you, is what I'm hearing?” He asked. 

“...I mean. Kind of?” The human replied. “Obviously I want you to like… take into account that you're fucking a virgin human who's a lot smaller than you, and not like, go as hard as possible and wreck me or anything. I mean. I'm more than okay with a torn hymen, but, please, don't just shove it in with no preparation. And uh. I know you have barbs on your dick. Please don't use them.” 

“What kind of divine being do you take me for?” Asmodeus commented, feigning offense. “I know you're probably gonna be ungodly tight. Being gentle was implied. Please, go on.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Toby asked, a little embarrassed. Asmodeus wrapped his arms around the human to rub his back, and trace his fingers through the human’s straight black hair. He pressed his clothed erection against the man's ass, drawing a soft gasp from him. “I mean… I know it's cringe, but, I kind of like the idea that I… I dunno… that I'm GIVING my virginity to you. That I actually get to choose who it… belongs to. And that, I mean, I chose... Theologically speaking… You can connect the dots…” He trailed off. 

“It's only a bad thing that I waited this long to take what's mine.” He said, choosing his words carefully. He felt Toby’s heart rate increase even further, he could practically taste how aroused the little human was. 

“This… long?” He asked. 

“Don't play dumb with me,” He said, “I see the way you act around me. You think word didn't get back around to me, going around telling people I'm ‘holding out on you?’ Your little human friends thought we were already fucking.” He trailed his hands down to the human’s ass, grabbing it and pulling them together more closely, encouraging him to start grinding on him. Toby didn't need to be encouraged twice. “You have NO idea how bad I’ve wanted to do this, and how much of an ASSHOLE I felt like I was being for feeling that way... I really thought for a good while that you were oblivious to it, or that it was just how you were, but that shit ATE at me. I asked around. The only person I talked to who's even seen your tits is Ezekiel, and he doesn't fucking count, he's seen everyone's tits.”

“Is this about…” Toby felt his face get hot. So he HAD noticed his little halfhearted attempts at flirting, or, really, attempts to tempt the demon into cornering him in a hallway somewhere and fucking the shit out of him. 

“The club? The shower? The times you asked me if you look flat in this binder? Yeah. Yeah it is. You don't do that shit with anyone else. And you almost got me, too, you almost convinced me it was all accidental, but you've really gone and done it now.” His hand found its way between the human’s thighs. “This? This is mine now, and I don't care who else thinks they have a claim. Truly, I do not.”

“Fuck…” Toby breathed, moving his hips rhythmically. “Can, um. Can we take this to your room?”

“Oh, that was never a question.” He said, picking Toby up. He carried the man bridal style in his arms, around the corner and into his room. There was in fact a lot of shit on the floor. He had a nice display shelf of sex toys and kink shit, like any respectable demon would,  but he also had a desk with a really fucked up looking gamer chair and a tricked out PC. There was a TV mounted on the wall, a closet full of basically the only two types of garments ex-cherubim wear (loincloths and cloaks,) and a little nook area next to the window that overlooked the city. He lived on a pretty high up floor, so there weren't a ton of privacy concerns. The floor did have a bunch of random shit on it, from laundry to weapons to food. 

The bed was pretty big. The covers were all fucked up and crumpled, with pillows randomly strewn about. Asmodeus set the human down on the bed on his back, getting on top of him and leaning down to kiss him. 

Toby melted into the kiss, which quickly turned to Asmodeus shoving his tongue in his mouth. Toby accepted this intrusion, largely letting the demon do what he wanted. He felt a shock of arousal as the demon grabbed his wrists and pinned them easily over his head. He felt another hand go between his legs, softly rubbing over the crotch of his jeans while they made out.

“Sit up.” He commanded, and Toby did so, as Asmodeus sat back on his folded legs to give him space to do so. The demon lifted the hem of Toby's shirt and lifted it off, removing it from his body. Then the next one, leaving him in his binder. “You wanna keep that on?” He asked.

“No.” Toby said. 

He expertly removed his binder, pulling it over his head like it was nothing, like he'd done that a million times before. “Fuck… wow. You the type of guy who likes having these played with?” He asked.

“I uh… um…” He stammered, “I… I think so. I dunno. I want to see what it feels like to have them played with, but… I do want them gone.”

“We'll do that tomorrow.” Asmodeus promised. 

“You serious?!” Toby said, “Wait, I can get top surgery in hell?!” 

“Yeah, ‘course you can. You know how many demons have tits that grow back? I have to get mine done every couple centuries, but I know a guy who has to have his done every few years.” He said. He cupped the human’s tits in his hands, thumbing over his nipples gently. Toby shivered.

“...Wait, you're trans?!” He said, the demon's words finally sinking in.

“Yeah, you got a problem with that?” Asmodeus asked.

“N-no! Not at all!!! I'm just… I mean… I'm shocked?” He said. “I mean, you've been grinding on me, talking about being inside me… I guess I kind of assumed you had a bio dick…? What kind of packer are you even using?!” He asked.

“Oh. No. That's… I don't think you get how it works, for demons… at least the type of demon I am…” He laughed. “Here.” He unbuckled his belt and threw his clothing to the side, guiding Toby's hand lower, until it made contact with his dick. 

In his hands was easily the biggest t cock Toby had ever thought possible. It was at least five and a half inches long and decently thick, definitely disproportionate according to Toby. (Although it is worth noting that even pre-T Cherub clit is already pretty fucking big, which is not something Toby would have known. Testosterone just makes that even crazier.) Around the very base of it, but only on the top side, there was a double row of fine barbs. The underside felt smooth though, and it was evident to Toby that he'd had the ligaments underneath it cut so that it could be used for penetration, kind of like simple meta/clitoral release surgery that some humans get. It was somewhat bovine in form, and had a head that was definitely not shaped like a human’s t dick would be. Toby pulled back the foreskin to examine the way his head felt, kinda flat and arrow shaped. He twitched in Toby's hand. 

“Oh my God…” He breathed, “You’re fuckin’ HUNG, dude!! What the hell are they PUTTING in the testosterone down here!?”

“Having a fat cock is basically the only cool part of having been a Cherub,” The demon said, moving just a little closer so that Toby could more effectively jerk him off. “You think you can take something this big?”

“Y-yeah, um… I think so,” He said, “I'm um… I’m really excited for you to fuck me. I’m sorry. Fuck, that was weird of me to say…” 

He let go of the demon’s cock as Asmodeus pushed his hands away, then pushed him down to the bed again.

“Let’s not waste any more time then.” He reached down and undid Toby’s belt, taking his jeans off, then his boxers. He lay there shivering in the cool air, hoping that Asmodeus liked what he saw. 

He did. He REALLY did. Toby was kind of gorgeous in a skinny, cringe fail emo boy kind of way. 

“Lemme get a good look at that cute little hymen, before I tear it.” Asmodeus said. He spread the human’s thighs wide apart, pulling his legs up and spreading his pussy. He was soaked down there, absolutely dripping wet with arousal, and he whimpered as the demon thumbed over his clit and observed the tiny little barely there piece of crescent of flesh around the bottom portion of his vaginal opening. “Holy shit, you weren’t fucking around… wow. WOW, that is a gorgeous little cherry. Okay, I’m going to have FUN breaking this. Can I take a picture?”

“Fuck, please do…” Toby begged. “Remember to be gentle, though, when you fuck me..?”

“I’m gonna be so fucking gentle with you,” He promised. He reached for his phone and snapped a picture of his pussy. “I promise I’m gonna be gentle, I really am, but the hymen has to go. This pussy is MINE,” He slid his fingers over it, teasing his entrance a bit and slipping a finger inside, “And I’m going to enjoy deflowering it.”

Toby squirmed and spread his legs a bit wider as the demon breached him, gently passing over his velvety soft insides. He really was ungodly tight. Asmodeus wasn’t sure he was going to be able to fit a ton more in there, but GOD, the way he felt around his finger, he HAD to try... He gently curled his finger up, playing with his g spot and making him gasp. 

“Oh, fuck me,” The human said, starting to realize what he’d been missing out on.

“I’m getting to it,” He joked, pulling his finger out of him and grabbing his hips, dragging him forwards and pulling his hips up so he was kind of folded over. “First, I’m gonna taste you. I really, REALLY like the taste of virgin pussy and I want to savor this as long as I can.” He confessed. 

“I thought you said you didn’t like the taste of-” He said, words cutting off into soft moans as Asmodeus ate him out, pressing the flat portion of his forked tongue over his clit repeatedly. His clit softly twitched against the demon’s tongue, and Asmodeus applied a little bit of gentle suction to the little organ before going back to the licking.

“Pussy doesn’t ACTUALLY taste like fish,” He responded with another head, listening to Toby giggle at him and secure a spot for his hands in his fur. He moved lower after a good thirty seconds, lapping at the entrance to his pussy and teasing the outside of it. Toby squirmed and gasped in his grip. Fuck, he tasted good. It had really been too long since he’d done this with someone this inexperienced. He went gently at first and then a bit more demanding, eventually licking a few last long stripes from bottom of the hymen to the head of his clit, and pulling his heads up.

“Why’d you stop?” Toby asked, legs shaking as the demon lowered his hips down to a less steep angle. 

“I can’t fucking wait anymore,” He said, truthfully, positioning his dick at the human’s entrance. “Fuck, you taste amazing… keep those legs spread for me, pretty boy…I’m gonna TAKE this cunt…” He instructed. Toby obeyed, allowing Asmodeus more access between his thighs as he rested his cock at the human’s entrance. “You ready?”

“I’m so fucking ready. Please. Put it in.” He said. He softly moaned as Asmodeus pushed inside of him, getting as far as halfway before he had to wait and let the man adjust. He was TIGHT tight, like, actively difficult to press inside of tight. Tight enough that Asmodeus wasn’t even sure it was going to fit. 

“You good?” Asmodeus said, gently rubbing circles into his hips, giving him time. 

“Ah… fuck… I… yeah,” He replied. “It feels… um… it kind of hurts, right now.” He confessed. 

“How about I pull out and we use some lube?” The demon suggested. 

“That… um… That sounds good.” He said, and Asmodeus pulled out. He leaned over and opened a drawer in his bedside table, pulling out a glass vial and uncorking it. He poured some of the cool liquid over the human’s pussy, causing him to gasp, and poured a bit in his hand, spreading it over his dick before corking the bottle again and setting it on the table. “Oh, that’s COLD!”

“Mhm, it should help, though.” He said, sliding his fingers over Toby’s pussy once again. He pressed his finger inside one more time, then added a second one. “How’s that?”

“...I think it’s better, like that.” He said. “Thank you, um… for being so patient with me.” 

“Toby.” Asmodeus said, curling his fingers up, “I’m taking your virginity. Taking a virginity requires a decent amount of patience to do correctly,” He explained. “Remember what I said? Your virginity is mine. This CUNT is MINE. I take VERY good care of things that belong to me.”

“N-not everyone would be this patient!” Toby said, in some attempt to give the demon praise. 

“Not everyone is good at sex or has ANY idea how to handle a virgin,” Asmodeus replied. 

“That doesn’t make sense,” Toby said, “Virgins have sex with each other all the time just fine!”

“They might do it all the time, but I’ll tell you right now, they don’t do it just fine.” He teased. “A pussy this tight requires expert hands and expert cock… I stand by my position that virgins shouldn’t fuck each other. Now spread your legs, little thing. I’m gonna pop that cherry for you.” Toby did not need to be told twice. Asmodeus pulled his fingers out of his cunt and replaced them again with his cock, pressing it slowly inside of him, centimeter by centimeter. He reached the point he’d had to stop at before much quicker than before, slowing his progress a bit to ask Toby if that was any better.

“Y-yeah, fuck, that’s a lot better… You can, um… you can put the whole thing in, please…” He requested, and Asmodeus didn’t hesitate to press the rest of the way in. He bottomed out at the five inch mark, not wanting to catch the human on the barbs. As he slid the last half inch into him, they both felt a tiny little pop, and an almost imperceptible extra bead of wetness. They both paused for a second, and Asmodeus looked into Toby’s eyes. “W-was that my…”

“Fuck yeah it was.” The demon said, reaching down and touching the very base of his pussy, bringing his finger up to his mouth and tasting the little bit of blood. His pupils dilated. 

It was only about a drop; the hymen is not exactly a crazy thing to break. Toby looked so happy and aroused by it all, and… Asmodeus just couldn’t take it anymore. He groaned, and began to thrust, trying to be slow and gentle like he’d promised despite how bad he wanted to just wreck this pussy. He leaned over, holding the humans’ upper thighs / hip area like handles as he fucked him, hands almost reaching all the way around his legs. Toby was SO tight, and SO warm and soft. Asmodeus took immense pleasure in being the first one to use him like this.

“Fuck, ohhh my God, please!! Please, fuck, please kiss me while you-!” Toby said, cutting himself off with another soft moan. The demon closed the gap between them, kissing the human again deeply and gently rocking against his hips. 

Toby was in paradise. He had tried not to get his hopes up before this, after listening to Isaiah talk about how getting penetrated wasn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and honestly kind of sucks more than half the time. He’d been worried about being underwhelmed, but this… this was pretty good. He liked how warm it felt in his lower belly to be full of cock. He liked how Asmodeus moaned and growled into his mouth and gripped his thighs and ass as he fucked him, so clearly getting a great amount of enjoyment out of his body. He liked the sound of their hips connecting, the gentle smack smack smack sound, he liked the way it felt to be fucked like this, to have Asmodeus’s cock stimulate spots inside him that he’d only touched on other people with his fingers. It felt really good. He wanted more.

“Fuck, you’re taking it so well,” He praised, breaking the kiss only long enough to praise him, reaching down to toy with his clit. Toby squirmed and rocked his hips against the stimulation, overwhelmed down there and still wanting more. 

“Y-you can go faster,” Toby said. He’d never had the opportunity to have a vaginal orgasm before, but, he felt like he was close to something, and Asmodeus gladly picked up the pace, sending him over the edge after a few more seconds of g spot pressure and hungry kisses. He got even tighter around the demon’s dick as he continued to rub at his clit, faster now, causing the poor human to writhe and moan and his overwhelmed pussy to squirt, getting a small volume of fluid on the bedsheets and his partner. He was shocked that this could even happen to him; in all honesty, he’d been pretty sure squirting wasn’t real…

“There you go, let go, cum all over my cock… fuckk… wow… good job, little thing…” He praised, continuing to thrust, slowing his pace down again and going with deeper, slower thrusts rather than faster shallower ones, to really fuck the last aftershocks out of this human. “I bet I can get you to do it again…”

“Ffc, ahh, ohmygod, ohhh…” He wasn’t very understandable, but Asmodeus took that as a good indicator that another time would be enjoyable. He repositioned Toby’s hips, took his hand off his clit and lifted Toby up, sitting him on his lap and holding him like a toy. He maneuvered his legs to either side of his body in a more comfortable pose, gently bouncing him in his lap and supporting his back, letting Toby use his legs a little bit to set the pace while making sure to do the work for him. He fucked Toby for a good five more minutes like that, kissing him and praising him, touching his hips and his back, exploring his body and grabbing at his ass before he started squirming again, grinding his hips against Asmodeus’s and making soft little noises of pleasure.

“You close?” Asmodeus asked, “Already? Again?”

“Yeah!!” He said, burying his face between the demon’s pecs. Asmodeus kept the pace, but allowed Toby to move his hips like he wanted.

“M-me too,” He said. He sped up, holding Toby close to his chest, before thrusting one final time and cumming inside the human, continuing to thrust more sporadically through his orgasm and sending Toby over the edge with him. He didn’t squirt the second time, but he still came, feeling shocks of warmth ripple through his abdomen as his partner twitched and throbbed inside him. He was so fucking glad this couldn’t get him pregnant, because if Asmodeus HAD the ability to get him pregnant, you best believe these two would have had a kid nine months from now. Toby and Asmodeus came down from their orgasms together, as the demon continued to grind his hips slowly up into the newly deflowered human. When they were both completely done, he pulled out.

“Fuck… ohhh… christ, you felt AMAZING…” He said, pressing a soft kiss to the exhausted human’s forehead and pulling him down to the mattress, so they could lay flat beside each other. “How was it for you? How’s it feel to not be a virgin anymore?”

“L-Let me put it this way,” He said, rolling over to hold onto the demon, who pulled up the blankets to cover them both so they could cuddle. “I… I definitely wanna do that with you again. A lot. Often... that was fucking awesome. Not being a virgin is cool as fuck.” He commented. 

“Don’t worry…C’mere.” He said, pulling the human in closer. “I’m not gonna be holding out on you anymore, that’s for fuckin’ sure…”

+++

He allowed himself one more look at the body counter, and seethed, seeing that the needle was at 1 on the meter. It had jumped from halfway to already there in the span of thirty minutes. Raphael got so pissed he almost failed to maintain his human appearance, which would have been a bit of a disaster at this fairly busy Earth diner. He’d figured as long as he was here, he might as well eat something… there really wasn’t much food or drink in heaven, it really wasn’t allowed, and Cherubim love caffeine and waffles.

“Will you fucking MOVE?!” He said, to the guy in front of him in line to be seated. “I have PLACES to be!”

“Man, this is a first come first serve situation.” Ezekiel said, “If you had a problem with that, you didn’t have to come here.” 

“And you shouldn’t have been allowed in here, dressed like that.” He gestured to Ezekiel’s light pink track pants and college hoodie. “I’m going to TEAR that ugly shit off of you if you don't get the fuck out of my way.”

“That’s the gayest shit I’ve heard in my life,” He said. “Honestly man, if you wanna bottom for me you just had to say that, you didn’t have to be RUDE. Here, do you want my card?” He started rummaging around in his bag. The angel took a deep breath and had to really dig deep not to incinerate this guy into a pile of dust. He had no idea who he was talking to, mostly because he was way too distracted by his anger at Toby and whoever just took Toby’s virginity. Ezekiel didn’t know what Raphael looked like, and was focused more mentally on worrying about the state of his vehicle, which he’d left to Edon to park, in a major city. He was starting to regret that, now, but, he was still deciding on whether or not it would be more or less of a disaster to let Edon into a restaurant unsupervised.

“You know what? I don’t have time to cover up a killing right now. You are nothing to me, you're inconsequential and completely inferior in the universe, and I’d only get around to killing you if I had the time to care at all about your miserable existence...” He said, turning around and leaving the restaurant. Walking down the street outside, he narrowly avoided getting hit by a shitty white minivan with even shittier tinted windows as whatever jackass was driving clearly didn’t have (or at least shouldn’t have had) a license, and drove like this was its second month on Earth. 

“Watch where you are fucking going!” He said, but the driver just LAID on the horn until he decided making a scene out of this wasn’t a viable option in such a crowded area.

+++

“You find a good parking spot?” Ezekiel asked. 

“Yes, but I did almost kill someone trying to get into it.” Edon admitted. “Did we HAVE to bring the car?”

“No, but I mean, I did promise you I’d take you home as SOON as possible and fuck you silly. It would take like an extra twenty minutes to get back if we take the bus.” He said.

“Okay, that I can get behind…” Edon said. Ezekiel held its hands and they talked a little bit while they waited to get their food. Ezekiel got Edon a chocolate milkshake, and got himself some actual food for dinner.

When their food arrived, Edon was pretty skeptical about the situation.

“It is all one texture.” It commented, putting its fingers in the food item and trying to lick it off of his fingers like a spoon.

“Hey! Don’t do that!” Ezekiel said. “You’re supposed to drink it with a straw. Here.” He unwrapped and put a straw in the milkshake for it. Edon just stared at it.

“I don’t understand.” It said.

“Ugh, fine. Try an actual spoon instead.” He handed Edon a spoon. It looked at him, annoyed, and dropped the utensil. 

“I’m going to drink it normally, thank you.” It said, picking up the heavy glass dish with both hands and drinking a sip of it hesitantly. Its eye went wide and it tipped the glass back, chugging it.

“Woah, woah, hey, slow down!” Ezekiel said. “Hey! You’re gonna make yourself throw up!” He had to grab the dish from Edon and pull it back to the tabletop to stop it. Edon had chocolate all over its mouth. “Hehe. Is it good?”

“Yeah,” It said, grabbing at the dish again. This time, Ezekiel just gave up, allowing the Throne to make its own mistakes and learn its own lessons. It finished the fairly large food item in a very short period of time, spending the rest of the time it allowed Ezekiel to eat just staring at his chest.

“You look sad.” Ezekiel said. 

“Because there is no milkshake left,” It said. Ezekiel gave it a look. “...and also I ate too fast and now I'm hurting...” It admitted. 

“Aw, poor thing. How about I get a box for this and we go home now?” Edon nodded softly, and Ezekiel did so, paying for the food and taking Edon out to the car. He drove it home (inadvertently making it pretty car sick on top of too full,) and brought it inside and up to the loft and the blanket pile. He stripped out of his hoodie and sweatpants, and helped Edon out of its pants, too, before pushing it back into the pile. “You want a blowjob?” He asked. 

“I want to not feel nauseous first…” It said, closing its eye. It held its hands over its face, shirt coming up a little bit and exposing its lower abdomen. Ezekiel really couldn’t have helped himself if he tried. He leaned down and touched its belly, touching it gently with the intention of making it feel a little bit better at least. It tensed up when he did that, but didn’t flinch away or anything.

“I’m sorry, buddy… next time maybe you should listen to me!” He said. “I know you’re smart, but, out of the two of us I definitely have more experience eating food.” 

“F-fuck, please-!” It said, wiggling under his touch. “Ah-!” Its face looked all blushy. 

“...Do you like this?” He asked, moving his hand a little less gently. Edon looked away from him in shame.

“...I… I don’t NOT like it…” It admitted. “It… fffuck, it feels like you’re touching me in such… a vulnerable place. You humans have all your organs behind here, you could just…. Reach in there and rip them out of me, if you… um… if you really wanted to, and you’re instead just… fuck, you’re just teasing, you’re just playful with me, y-you…” It stammered its way through its explanation. Ezekiel went just a little gentler, ghosting his hands over the sides of its hips, then covering a much wider area in the arc of movement he used, pressing gently on its tummy so he didn’t make it feel sick. “Y-you’re touching me there so s-soft and gentle and it feels VULNERABLE, and, OKAY, FINE!!!! I LIKE IT!” It admitted. “Arseni’s friends toyed with me at the Christmas Party and they were REALLY mean about it and I… I really liked it a lot…”

“Yeah?” Ezekiel asked, smiling down at it. It nodded. “But you don't want me to be mean to you right now, do you, while your tummy hurts?” It shook its head. “You want me to keep touching you all nicely while you touch yourself?”

“...A little.” It admitted. 

“Let me guess, you wanna be my little spoon and get under the blankets, too?” He teased. Edon looked away in embarrassment: he really knew it too well. 

“...mhm..”

“Okay. Let’s do that, huh? Let’s get you all cozy…” He picked up a blanket while Edon lay down, showing its little butt as it curled up its legs to get comfortable. Ezekiel got right up next to it, draping his arms over the angel and putting his hand back where it was. It reached down between its thighs and began stroking itself, getting off on the closeness and the comfort and the way Ezekiel just KNEW that this was exactly what it needed… it really liked the belly rubs, and it was a little embarrassed to learn this way that Ezekiel hadn't only NOTICED, but REMEMBERED that it preferred masturbating in this position and using its human form to do it. Much less of a mess, and felt more complete that way... “Yeah, yeah, you're welcome. What would you do without me and whatnot…” Ezekiel said, when the angel didn't really say much except make soft noises to indicate that all of this felt really good. 

“I-I would be having a much worse time,” It replied. “No milkshake. No touching. No warm blankets. I would be sitting there watching TV or something,” It said.

“You’d still be jerking off though.” He said.

“That is true.” It said. Ezekiel pressed a few soft kisses into its shoulder, enjoying how its arm moved as it pleasured itself. “Fuck… I… I did not think this was going to go this way…” It admitted. 

“Your life? Or this restaurant idea?” He asked.

“Both,” Edon replied, speeding up its hand movements.

“Is it a good thing, or a bad thing, do you think?” He rubbed gentle, smaller circles into the angel’s flesh with his thumb as he moved his whole hand around. Edon squirmed under his touch.

“Good thing,” It replied. “Fffuck, it’s a good thing. Y-you always know just what I need…”

“Of course I do, silly…” He said, “You’re my favorite. How could I forget what you like? I want to make you feel good, after all.” Edon blushed down to its collarbones and began to struggle to keep its motions gentle. 

“I-I’m your… favorite?” It asked.

“Yeah! You’re my favorite.” He said. “You’re really very special to me, y’know.”

“I… I’m… special?”

“Of course you are!” Ezekiel praised. He began to gently slow down the movements of his hand on the angel’s tummy, transitioning into very slow, teasing movements. “You’re very special to me. You’re my little angel.” He said. Edon bucked its hips into its fist harder at that, so he kept going. “You’re mine.” 

“....say that again…?” Edon requested in a small voice. 

“You're mine?”

“A-again…!” Ezekiel laughed at it, giving it another little kiss on the shoulder. It whined and fucked its fist harder, eyes shut tight.

“You’re MINE, Edon… you belong to ME.” 

“Ah- fuck-!” 

“You're so fucking cute like this, I love watching you all cozy and happy…” He said, giving another kiss where he could reach. “You deserve to feel this good. You belong right here in my arms.” Edon felt some kind of feeling in its chest when he said that. 

“I… I'm-!”

“Are you close already?” He asked, not stopping his movements. Edon sped up its, and nodded. “Yeah? You like being touched this way, you like being told what a gorgeous and deserving being you are? That you're MY angel?”

“Y-yes!” It breathed, barely audible, before finding its voice again as it came. “Fuck!!!! I love you!!!” It cried, unable to stop itself as it got cum all over the blankets… and its shirt… and its hand. Ezekiel laid there entirely still except for his hand on Edon’s tummy, which he didn't stop moving until the angel was all done. They lie beside each other in stillmess, Edon still breathing a little heavy. He pushed himself up into a sitting position. 

“...You um… do you really mean that?” He asked. 

Edon looked away.

“Ummm…” It said, then it put a hand over its mouth. “Imgonathrowup-” 

“Turn away from the blankets-!” Ezekiel grabbed its shoulders and physically moved the angel so its mouth was over The Bucket, which was a bucket Ezekiel had here for this exact reason. Edon had a terrible habit of eating things it really shouldn't while in human form and then getting stuck like that while its body tried to purge whatever it was that it ate. At least this time it was milkshake and not pigeon or rat or styrofoam or plastic… 

He tried to hold its short hair away from its face and eye as it threw up, rubbing its back and trying to give it some comfort. He knew now that the conversation was over, but… he did kinda want to know what Edon’s answer would have been.

“All better?” He asked. Edon nodded. “Good. How do you feel about a shower?

“... I would feel very good about a shower.”

+++

Back in heaven, the Archangel retired back to his office to try and at least sort himself out. 

He threw his bag and human clothes on the floor and collapsed into his chair, faces in his hands. He sighed. All that and I didn't even get food out of it!!! Where the FUCK is that little slut?! I have to find her… WAIT. I still have the phone transcripts to sort through -!

It rummaged through its drawers, pulling out the flat metal object that Tahir had located earlier and searching through calls until he got to the ones he hadn't reviewed yet. When he'd done the initial review, he’d only gone through and saved conversations that directly related to the party or Heaven or Tahir, the stupid social calls he'd left out of the recordings out of convenience because there were a lot of them. Arseni LOVED to just call up its stupid friends and talk, and Raphael was CERTAIN there had to be something in here with Toby in it. 

He scrolled through the call history and eventually found one between Toby and the Cherub. This was from the portion of the audio that was corrupted, where only one voice could be heard. It was, infuriatingly, Arseni’s voice. 

Hiiii Toby!!! What did you wanna ask me about? 

Wait, really? 

Okay okay I'll stop interrupting! 

There was a long silence except for Arseni’s small reactions to whatever Toby said.

Well, as much as I'd like to be an ass and lie to you for my own benefit, I do have to say, you don't understand at all how demons work. I would challenge you to find me a demon who's interested in human men and yet would still reject the opportunity to take YOUR virginity.

What? Come on! We both know that's really what you're asking. Yes it's that obvious!!!

Yes, he's into men. What do you mean how do I know? Isn't that why you asked me?!

No, I'm not a man. Frankly, you aren't ready to have the conversation with me about what my gender identity is. Either way we're getting off topic!!! I'm excited for you! Yeah! I mean, I'd prefer it to be me instead of him but, I'm stuck in heaven for at least another month and I can't imagine that you're planning on waiting that long. 

What have you tried so far?

Raphael was pacing the room, holding the recording in his hands, trying to make himself wait before opening up the cage to attempt to beat the answers out of Arseni. Every time he opened it, it let in divine light, which Arseni would be able to use for energy and make it much easier for it to fight back. 

Holy shit man. Yeah, I would think that would work, too! Maybe he's just misinterpreting it?

How off was the shirt? Oh, all the way? Did you show him your chest?

Toby!!! That's why it isn't working! You're being way too vague about your intent here! He probably thinks he's inadvertently creeping on you. 

Yes, demons tend to care at least a little bit about that!! 

Yeah, sure, not all of them, but I mean, definitely Asmodeus. He's loyal as FUCK, honestly, that guy would kill for his partners…

ASMODEUS!!!! Raphael was even more furious now. He fumbled with the keys and began the process of unlocking the cage. He needed to know the other half of this fucking conversation…

Are you sure you don't just want me to talk to him? I can tell him you're into him. I'll even tell you what he says.

No? Really? Okay, suit yourself. I mean. I'll tell you right now that you have an amazing shot at the guy. I recommend you sit him down and tell him directly, “I am a virgin and I don't want to be, And I want YOU to be the one to take it, please.”

The wall opened up, revealing…. Nothing. Empty chains. Raphael punched the wall hard enough to leave a hole in it, and immediately left the office…

+++

Tahir stashed Arseni in his new office while he set everything back exactly how it was before: cleaning the office, resetting the cage, wiping the history on the recording device, locking drawers, and finally moving keys back to where they belonged in Raphael's lockbox. 

Arseni had also requested a few items from the evidence locker, which Tahir had firmly said NO to retrieving, on the grounds that it would implicate him even harder.

“Oh, come on! We're falling TONIGHT!” Arseni complained. “Who cares?!”

“I care!! In case we get caught!” He said. Arseni looked down at him from its position on the couch, annoyed. It was still exhausted from the past week of being held prisoner in a terrifying torture chamber, but, it also really wanted to go to Earth, right now, and wanted to bring its nice clothes, and its makeup, and its crazy demonic technology that it had collected over the years. “Besides, you can barely fly. I'm not carrying it for you.”

“...Fine.”  It said, crossing its arms. Tahir paced the office, trying his best to hype himself up for this. 

“I can't believe I'm defecting.” He said, “I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe I'm throwing it all away for you.”

“For ME?! Did you not hear my whole speech?” Arseni argued. “The second Raphael finds out you're not a virgin, he's going to really hurt you. That's what happened to me, it's what happened to Kiron, it's what happens to every one of his… victims.”

“I fail to see how he wouldn't have already KNOWN you weren't a virgin!” Tahir shot back. “He would never find me out because I'm not a slut!” Arseni sat up. 

“I'm sorry… are you saying it's my fault?” It said. 

“...No!” Tahir said, stopping in his tracks. “I'm SAYING that you… you made yourself an easy target…” Arseni sighed.

“I really hope you know that they aren't going to like you in Hell.”  It stood up on shaky legs just to stand taller over the little Virtue as it counted off on its fingers. “You jerked off to voice recordings of me having phone sex with someone who wasn't you in the office of an archangel. You rebounded so hard off of me that the second that Metabelle showed her usual attention to you you fucked her, and then got SO freaked out that she'd tell on you that you came running back to me anyway! I know for a fact you've had at least 5 sex partners in the past two months; Isaiah, me, Iraa, Jaasiel, and Metabelle. And you were giving Silaa eyes in the archives, too! She told me! You are not discreet as you think you are. I can tell you're in heat because I know you pretty damn well by now, and it's only a matter of what, I give it one more month, before your heat starts again and Raphael gets wind of what's going on with you. And after that, boom, life over.”

“I've yet to see ANY proof that he'd actually do something like that!” Tahir said, crossing his arms.

“Are you- are you fuckin’ serious?” Arseni gestured to the ligature marks around its wrists, ankles, and necks. “The cage in his office isn't like, a LITTLE suspicious to you?” 

“You're a wanted felon!” Tahir argued.

“And now, so are you.” Arseni said. Tears pricked in the corners of his eyes.

“I can't believe this is happening to me…”

“If you hadn't come back to Raphael's office just to touch yourself, then it probably WOULDN'T be.” Arseni said, amused. “You've got no one to blame but yourself.” 

“It's YOUR fault I even have these urges anyway!!!” He yelled, “I, I was perfectly pure before you came along and ruined me! Corrupted me in your lustful ways!!!” He paced the office, and Arseni followed his movements with its many eyes.

“You mean when YOU came to ME in tears over your attraction to human men, and I gently offered you relief in Heaven, and you were down, so we had loving gentle sex multiple times and you came to me every night in want of a safe place to rest your head and I gave that to you? And we fell in love, and I introduced you to the pleasures of the flesh because I felt so strongly for you, and because I wanted to make you feel good?” It said. Tahir just stood there. “You mean when I used to sit you in my lap on the high up bench in the shower, and listen to you talk about your court cases while I washed your hair?” 

“...I meant that you were the one who started my heat cycles.” He said. A shower like that sounded really good right now.

“That honestly could have been Isaiah.” Arseni commented. A tear rolled down his cheek. He looked really upset and unsure of what to do now; Stay in heaven and risk it, or go to Hell and have a terrible, terrible time…

“If I go to Hell with you, can we take those showers, again?” He finally said.

“...Yes.” Arseni replied. “Whatever you want, man, I already told you I'll do whatever, I just need help getting out of here.” 

“No!!! I-I don't want it to be like that!” He cried. “I-I don't want it to be transactional, I want you to WANT to do that with me! If you don't want it, forget it.” 

“I want it.” It replied, level, practiced.

“You don't really mean that.” 

“I want it!” It said again, incredulous. “Fuck, get over here, I'll SHOW you, if that's what it takes.” Tahir looked at the Cherub with a critical eye. It got down on his level. He could see its legs shake with the effort of maintaining that position. “Come here.” 

“...Are you really sure?” He said.

“I'm sure.” It said. “Let's get on the couch. I'll sit you in my lap and we can just kiss for a while.” 

Wordlessly, Tahir went to the couch, and Arseni followed close behind. Arseni did its best to sit down on the couch gracefully, and spread its legs for Tahir to get between. He did, and he melted into the comforting hug the Cherub gave him. 

“I missed this.” Tahir said, as Arseni toyed with the feathers on his wings. 

“I did as well.” It replied, pulling him closer. “You're such a fucking asshole but you're SO cute…”

“I resent that!!!” Tahir weakly protested, reaching up to try and pull Arseni down for a kiss. It relented, lowering its head and kissing him. It was a soft, slow, gentle kiss. Tahir’s lips felt so soft against it's, and it could tell that both of them were thinking about that shit Isaiah had said in those messages. They came together again for another kiss, and Arseni brought a hand to the back of Tahir’s head, and another to his back, right between his wings. It gently, slowly began to move its thumb in gentle circles there, grazing the junction between the wing and its attachment point on his back. 

Tahir was certain that Arseni could tell he was hard. It adjusted their position just so, so that Tahir had a surface on which to grind, which he began to do very cautiously as they continued to make out.

“Fuck… I really shouldn't be doing this.” The Cherub said, breaking the kiss.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Tahir replied,”YOU’RE the one saying that right now?!”

“You can say it too, if that'll make you feel better.” It said. “I just… I mean. It's pretty clear to me the direction this is going.”

“Direction?! What direction???” He asked. “We’re… we’re just kissing!!” 

“Oh, yeah, just kissing.” Arseni mocked. “Where have I heard that before?” Its hands still idly toyed with his wings.

“No!!! Really!!!” He insisted. “I…I just wanted to… do this, again. Sit with you in the quiet. Kiss a little bit. Be held.” As true as that statement was, he still struggled to sit still in Arseni’s lap. It had been too long.

“...Well, I was about to say, ‘it seems like you really want to put those pretty lips around my cock’, but, now I'm not really sure.” It said. They locked eyes. Tahir’s face got red and he averted his gaze. “See? I know that look. The ‘please put me on my knees in front of you’ type look. Easily confused with the ‘please please I can’t take it anymore I need you to cum in my ass’ look.”

“I-I’m not intentionally…” He said, trailing off. “I really was just trying to kiss. I'm not TRYING to look like I want to be on my knees, my face… it just gets like that. I don't know.” He said.

“But you DO want to be on your knees.” It said.

“I mean… I’m not OPPOSED to it…” He started, unable to deny it, but wanting Arseni to understand that he hadn’t PLANNED this…

 “Oh, yeah. You REALLY want to be on your knees.” Tahir pulled himself closer to the larger angel. 

“We don't need to do this.” He said. “I-I mean, if you wouldn't get enjoyment out of it…”

“Oh, no, I actually hate getting my dick sucked.” Arseni said, sarcastically. “And it would just be terrible if we went one office over and did it in Raphael's desk chair, oh, that would be simply sacrilegious…” 

“ Okay, we are NOT doing that!!!” He said, and watched as Arseni giggled at him and tussled his hair. 

“You’re right, that would just be stupid. A girl can dream, I suppose.” Arseni commented, pushing Tahir away so he was at about half of arm's distance, while still perched in its lap. “But yeah. No. I do want to kiss your stupid little face, but, after that shit you pulled back there… I want to punish you. Properly. Especially if I’m not getting ANY of my shit from the evidence locker, and I’m going to have to go down to Hell and defend your ass in front of the Infernal Court.”

“Punish…?” He said. 

“Well. Punish is a strong word. I guess it would be more accurate to say I want to spank you over my lap until you’re crying and then fuck your pretty mouth. I assume that wouldn’t really be a punishment, to you.”

“...No, it really wouldn’t.” Tahir replied. “It would kind of be the opposite.”

“Whatever. I’m doing it anyway.” Arseni said. “Lie across my lap.” The Virtue did so, embarrassed. He was even more embarrassed when Arseni pulled up his robes to expose his bare ass, which there was definitely still oil on. “Oh, I forgot about that…” It said, tracing a finger over the oil, and gently massaging over his entrance, teasingly, like it MIGHT just decide to slip a finger inside… “FUCK, you’re REALLY going to test my patience tonight. What I wouldn't do to have you bouncing on it… another time, maybe.” It said, taking the finger away.

“...Maybe…?” He said, quietly. He moaned softly in frustration as the touching back there stopped and the Cherub wiped its now oily fingers on Tahir’s clothes.

“If I do a good job of defending you in Hell.” It clarified. “Consider it self motivation, my restraint tonight. Maybe you'll be less disappointed that way.” 

“You're acting so… weird!” He said, and the Cherub brought its hand down hard, smacking his ass and leaving a red handprint. Tahir made a small noise of surprise, and Arseni could feel his cock twitch against its thighs. 

“How so?” It asked.

“U-usually you're very eager to, um…” Another SMACK range out through the office. “U-uM!!! So eager to!!! Penetrate me!!!”

“Yeah well, it feels GOOD for you when I do that. You're already prepared for me, you did quite a good job with the oil, you know. If I fucked your little ass right now you'd probably not last three minutes. And this is supposed to be a punishment.” It said. “So… no. I'll be using your mouth, or you won't be getting anything at all.” 

“You're not even going to put your fingers in me?” He asked. SMACK. 

“...Maybe just for a little bit.” It said, resolve breaking. It delved between his legs and teased at his entrance once more, applying soft pressure, and trying not to react too much when Tahir turned his head and tried to stifle a moan as its finger breached him. It summoned an astral hand, raised it up, and

SMACK. Again. Tahir yelped and tightened quite a bit around the larger Angel's finger. It spanked him a good four more times still inserted, unable to resist the urge to toy with his most sensitive places and listen to his pretty voice call out in pain and pleasure. With each impact, Tahir’s little vocalizations got closer to just pleasured, and finally he was just moaning as Arseni spanked him and milked his prostate.

Once he started sounding like he was getting close, it sensed the stimulation was likely too much for what its goals were for this, and, begrudgingly, removed its fingers from his ass. This left him very empty and unsatisfied. 

SMACK.

“You were enjoying the punishment a little too much, little dove.” It said.

“I-I,,, ohhh….” He breathed. “I,, I’m sorry, please… please put them back in…?” SMACK.

“No.” 

“B-But!!!”

“No but. No more touching back there.” It teased. “You've had enough.” The smaller angel whimpered pathetically.

“Arseni I will do anything, please, I, I want you, you feel so good I want you inside me I miss the sex we had, I , I'm losing my mind, please, please…!” He had his face in his hands, unable to face the embarrassment with his face uncovered. SMACK.

“Just kissing, huh?”

“It was your idea to do … this!!” He argued. SMACK.

“You were thinking so loud it was hurting my ears, Tahir. You want me to relay to you what I was getting from your sinful mind? Because I will.” 

“I-” SMACK. 

“Oh, please, oh, Lord, I hope it lets me have another taste of its cock,” Arseni said, doing a really bad impression of Tahir’s voice. SMACK. “It's probably so fucking mad at me and oh, fuck, what if it was just so upset and wanted to take out its frustration on me? I shouldn't be thinking this!!!” SMACK. “But don't I deserve it? I don't deserve to be treated nicely by it right now. WHY does that turn me on?! What is wrong with me?” SMACK. “Did I get it? Was I pretty spot on?”

“....Yeah.” He confessed. SMACK.

“Well, unluckily for you,” SMACK. “MY idea of punishment isn't the rough, graceless fucking that you want.” SMACK. “It's spanking your little ass until it's red,” SMACK. SMACK. SMACK. “teasing you like this while you're in heat,” SMACK. “then leaving you to ride out the rest of your cycle in a jail cell in Hell.” 

“B-but!!! The desk!” He said, “Don't you want to fuck me over my new desk? Come on, it's… it's your last night in heaven! When are you going to get a chance to do THAT again?” He bent over further, trying to show off more of his hole. Arseni bit the inside of its lip.

“...You are incorrigible.” It said. “Oh, you are such a fucking hypocrite, you are so… you are so BAD!” It said. “I can't believe you called me a degenerate back there and then you turn around, not even a day later, and you're begging for me to fuck your ass over your desk!”

“... I'm sorry?” He offered. SMACK.

“Not sorry enough!!!” SMACK. “Start confessing.”

“Confessing WHAT?!” He asked. 

“All the fucked up shit you did! And you better be actually sorry!” SMACK.

“I… I’m sorry I called you a degenerate!” SMACK. “I… I'm sorry I… I didn't believe you about Raphael!” SMACK. “I'm sorry I testified against you and your Throne in court multiple times!!!” SMACK. SMACK. SMACK. “Ow!!!”

“Keep going.” It commanded. “Do good enough and I'll forgive you and fuck you rough over the desk like you want.” 

“I'm sorry for prosecuting others for ‘crimes’ that I myself commit!” SMACK. “I'm sorry for calling your friend a gender confused harlot! I'm sorry for calling your Throne a pervert! I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!” SMACK.

“Are you getting off on this?” Arseni asked. Tahir nodded shamefully.

“I.. I'm sorry I'm getting off on this…” He said. “I'm sorry I didn't come to you sooner. I'm sorry I gave my virginity to that stupid human instead of giving it to you. I'm sorry I fucked all your friends days after we broke up!!” SMACK.

“I forgive you for that last one,” It said. “My friends are hot.” 

“I'm sorry I'm such a slut!!!” 

“You don't have to apologize for that.” 

“I'm sorry I'm a HYPOCRITE!” SMACK. 

“Better.”

“I'm sorry for everything!! Please please PLEASE fuck me, I need it so bad!” SMACK. 

“I don't think you're done confessing yet.” It said. 

“My mind,, is all fuzzy…” He said. “I can't think of any more!” 

Behind the wall of this office, they heard the door to Raphael's office SLAM shut. 

“...Okay, well, too bad. You took too long. We're on borrowed time, now!” Arseni said, quietly. It pulled him to his feet, covering him up with his clothing. He stood there, devastated, on shaky legs. “Ready to go to Hell? I think I'm rested enough that I won't fall out of the sky. We're probably going to have to fight the Powers at the gate, so, I hope you're decent at hand to hand combat -”

“WHAT?” He whisper shouted. “B-but!!!”

“No buts! Let's go!” 

“Come on, please!!!” He said, tugging on the ruins of Arseni’s party dress as it walked by, opening up his desk drawers and pulling documents from them. “Please, just five minutes!!!”

“If you'd apologized for saying I made myself an ‘easy target’, I would have already had you bent over the desk,” It said. “Too late now. Here, look, these documents are important.” It shoved some paperwork into a scroll case and shoved the case into his hands. “Bring these with you down to Hell and we'll tell them it was YOUR idea to bring them. This intel… let me look through a few more files..” It got down on its knees to search the files. “I want a few more documents… it'll make you look a lot better. I'll coach you on what to say on the way down. They're probably going to punish you a little bit at least, but, we want to get that down to something like mandatory baptism in hellfire and community service, not like, actual jail time or being cast from Hell to roam the earth.” 

“Slow down!!!” Tahir said, head spinning from all this. “S-so, we're really… doing this? We're intentionally flying down to the gates of hell and turning ourselves in?”

“No no no. YOU'RE turning yourself in. I'm dropping you off and going clubbing.” It explained, handing him a few more documents. “I already cleared my name with Azazel, and my charges were dropped because of my role in the Christmas Party Fall.”

“...Do I have any other options?” Tahir asked. 

“I mean… you could stay up here and take your chances with-” They both heard a loud CRACK sound from the other side of the wall that sounded like stone breaking. “With uh… that guy.” 

“...How bad is jail in Hell?” Tahir asked. Arseni gave him a look. “...Right. Why am I even asking!!! It's jail!!! In hell!!!” He began to cry again as Arseni emotionlessly took the scroll case from him and shoved the documents in.

“Don't cry, my dove. It won't be so bad. You'll be out in less than a month, tops, and I'm going to testify to support you. You'll get out.”

“They're going to kill me in there!!” He cried.

“They're not. Worst case scenario, you have to see Metabelle again.” It said. “I've been to jail in hell, Pandemonium Angelic Correctional. It's really not that bad. Earth jail is way worse. The only part of it that really sucks is that they put this collar on you that prevents you from using any magic, including healing magic and astral hands, so, don't get injured, and be grateful you have hands. And you HAVE to eat food to live. There's no divine light in Hell like there is one Earth.” He still looked afraid. “Oh, stop that. You're pretty high profile, they might even put you in a solitary cell.”

“...Might??” He asked, as Arseni approached the door. “Did they put YOU in a private cell?”

“...No. I did have freak nasty sex with my cellmate though. Ahh, those were the days…”

“What did you get arrested for???? Why'd they let you out?!! How?! What?!” He had a lot of questions, yes, but he was also stalling, as he watched Arseni approach the door. 

“Which time?” It asked. 

“There were multiple times?!” 

“Oh you mean just at PAC? No, I only went there once, and it was for fighting. I… I used to be much more wild, in my youth…” 

“Stop fucking REMINISCING about your prison time!!! What am I supposed to do!!! How will I survive!!!” He asked.

“Just fucking.. try and chill out, a little bit!!!” It said. “And shut the fuck up, we gotta get out of here. Shhh!” It opened the door. “And keep those keys!”

“What do I SAY?! I'm no CRIMINAL!!!” Tahir complained very quietly as they made their way as quickly as they could down the hallway, and out the nearest exit. 

“Yeah you are!” Arseni said. “We’ll just show up at the gates, you say, ‘Hi, I’m Tahir, I’m here to turn myself in’ and they’ll take it from there.” Arseni led them through the Gardens, in some attempt to conceal their movements so that nobody would see them.

“...I guess…” He said. “How do we even GET to Hell?!”

“I’m just going to bring you to my friend’s place first, how about that?” It said. “You can chill for a second, get your bearings… I dunno, maybe Ezekiel will take pity on you. He’s REALLY into pathetic, wet kitten type guys. And there’s a hell portal in the basement.”

“...Are you going to tell her- I mean. Him. Are you going to tell him I-”
“Oh yeah. No. I’m gonna tell him you constantly misgender him and call him a harlot every chance you get. I’m also going to tell him you think his kinks are weird.” They crossed over to the East Gate, which was, for whatever reason, fairly sparsely guarded. 

“...Great.” He said. “Why don’t we just go directly to hell?”

“Because I’m not going to Hell without eating something first.” Arseni said. Tahir looked at it like it was crazy. "What?? Shut up. Go distract the guards."

Chapter Text

The fall from grace was something Tahir honestly wanted to forget as fast as he could. It was a blur; lying to the guards, not being believed, the sounds of alarm bells going off, being held in a chokehold at knifepoint and having his garments torn off his body to check for weaponry, the feeling of the holy blade slicing into his flesh as the Power holding him got absolutely DECKED by Arseni, dodging spears and cannon rounds… the searing burn of the lash wrapping around his ankle in the chaos… the way he really thought it was all over, before being grabbed by the halo and pulled through the stratosphere, down, down, down… falling through air, being told to keep his wings FOLDED, goddammit, or they were going to get caught! 

As soon as they were able to lose their pursuers, hiding out underneath a bridge, Arseni gave a whole lecture about what to do once they arrived at the Chapel; “Explain that you’re here to make amends and switch sides, beg for forgiveness, acknowledge that what you did was wrong, demonstrate that you are willing and able to make up for what you’ve done in some way. Be ready to face pretty much every single case you ever tried that got felled and have them take the stand and tell the court EVERYTHING. Prove that you have no current connections in Heaven aside from the council members, who you are only coworkers with. Emphasize that you’re only 300 something years old, you’re just a baby, you didn’t know any better! If you were a human, you’d be a fresh out of college 22 year old with no life experience, you spent more than half of your life just in education, which is basically indoctrination, and look how quickly you turned after realizing what you were doing was wrong! And show them the documents I packed for you, some of that shit is CLASSIFIED classified, Hell’s militia would LOVE to get their hands on that.” 

But Tahir wasn’t listening. His mind was filled with visions of torture and hellfire and pain. He was certain it was going to be unbearable. 

“...Will you… will you visit me? Do they have visitation?” He asked, softly. He adjusted his position, as the freezing cold gravel underneath this bridge didn’t feel great on his bare ass, especially not after getting spanked so hard.

“I mean… I’m basically going to be your lawyer, but, sure?” It said. 

“How badly is it going to hurt?”

“...Not?” Arseni explained, transforming, and gesturing for Tahir to do the same. “It isn’t going to hurt. You’re going to a glorified holding cell, Tahir, not a medieval dungeon.”

“I know!! But isn’t there fire??? And gnashing teeth?!” He asked.

“In SOME parts of Hell, yes!” Arseni said, “But not populated areas! PAC is in downtown Pandemonium, it’s pretty livable if you like ugly buildings.” Tahir sighed and transformed. For the first time ever, he found himself looking DOWN at Arseni. He had a good six inches on the Cherub like this. 

“Wow. You’re… short.” He commented, as Arseni wrapped its torn and bloody clothing around itself partially, then balled up the rest of what wasn’t going to fit into a shape easier to carry. 

“Shut up, or I’m not visiting you in jail.” It said. “Let’s go.”

“Wait!!! Hold on! I’m fully naked right now.” He argued. “I… I am not going out there like this! I will get arrested by the HUMAN cops!”

“No you won’t. It’s below freezing outside, the human cops are just going to think you’re extremely mentally ill. Worst case scenario, they take you to the hospital.”

“Give me something to wear.” He said, firmly. “I am not budging on this. I refuse to be naked in public.”

“I don’t have anything for you to wear!” It said, frustrated.

“Tear off a part of the clothing you have on!!” He said, grabbing some of the fabric out of its hands. 

“Hey! This is ALL I have left of my entire LIFE in heaven! I am NOT tearing it up even more!” It said. 

“That is not true at ALL!!” Tahir shouted, and Arseni shushed him to encourage him to keep his voice down. “I know for a FACT you must have sent PLENTY of documents and at least the good half your insane stash of porn and sex toys, your diploma, your trumpet, your ridiculous pink bong, a decent number of outfits, some artifacts, and your stupid ‘memory box’ all through that portal you must have used to set up your God forsaken PARTY! I know because I was the one that had to CATALOG everything found at the scene, and there were some NOTABLE exceptions!!!”

“You think I am getting any of that shit BACK this millenia?!” It argued. “ALL of that is in an evidence locker somewhere in HELL. And my porn is NOT insane!!” 

“It’s fucking WEIRD that you have that much porn!!!” He accused.

“Weirder than you being able to tell which half of my porn is the good half?” It shot back. “How’d you catalog that, huh, Virtue boy? Huh? Did you do it alphabetically or by category? How’d you like my little additions?” Tahir blushed at the memory of flipping through magazine after magazine to find a few pictures of humans that sort of looked like him, with wings and halos drawn on in gold sharpie... “Was it good for you? I’ll be honest, I did leave behind your favorite one in hopes you’d be doing the cataloguing. Did you get to look through that special edition of STRICT that you like so much one last time?”
“The… the one with the…”

“The one with the full page spread of that twink in a half-body glory hole with like, three men lined up to take his ass, and he’s-”
“He’s got all those tally marks drawn on him…” Tahir finished Arseni’s sentence, then looked at the ground in shame. He couldn’t bear to admit that he’d actually removed that one from evidence and had it stashed in his old room.

“...Okay. Alright… I admit it, that’s on me, now you actually NEED me to give you something to cover up with.” It sighed and tore off a piece of the gown that was hanging on by a thread, anyway. Tahir tied it around his waist like a towel. “Happy now? Let’s get going! It’s like two AM and I want to speak with Ezekiel…”

+++

“I’m not leaving my friend up there to be tortured.” Azazel argued. “If you all won’t do anything, I will, yeah? At least if I get captured, you all will DO something about it instead of just sitting on your asses!”

“There’s nothing we CAN even DO!” Beelzebub argued back. “We don’t know where it's being held. We don’t know how secure the area is. Raphael is ANGRY, he’s been non stop trying to contact all of us and demand we give up Toby AND Asmodeus, which we aren’t going to do. Ezekiel narrowly avoided getting torn to shreds just trying to go to a restaurant down the street, and once the dumbass finally figured out THAT was Ezekiel he’s been non stop SCREAMING at him in his mind, which, I mean… I’m sure you’ve gotten the voicemails, too, I have like twenty of them. I can’t imagine having to listen to that shit for hours on end. If you want to go up there and try and find it, and risk being instantly smited into a pile of ash, be my fucking guest.”

“...What about Tahir?” Edon suggested. “He did not fall, at least, he was not numbered among those that fell. Arseni sent him away when he came to the door. We could use him.” 

“How would we contact him?” Beelzebub asked. 

“I do not know, you said you had insiders!” The Throne suggested. “Have them contact him! Tahir has all this status and access to things that a normal angel would not, if he can be contacted… I believe he would be of some use. And if HE gets in trouble for it… well… I for one do not care.” It finished.

“That’s actually a pretty solid idea.” Azazel said. “Okay. Yeah. I like that. We could even offer him immunity as payment. He’s a council member, he’s a highly desirable Virtue, he’s basically Archangel bait… yeah. We could have him do what I wanted Toby to do, distract that motherfucker long enough for us to find Arseni. That would work.” 

“I don’t think we need to offer IMMUNITY,” It said. “I mean… that’s a bit much.” There was a loud knock at the door of the Chapel, that could be heard from the Sanctuary where Team Hell had been holding meetings as of late. They heard Ezekiel stumble out of bed upstairs and shout 

“I’ll get it!” as he made his way down to the door.

“If we don’t offer him immunity, he’s not going to agree to do it.” Azazel said. “From what I’ve heard, he’s pretty… Virtuous. But even HE can see the writing on the walls. It’s in his best interests to defect.”

“I still don't see why we can't convince him simply by explaining to him the REASONS it is in his best interest to defect,” Edon said. “I do not care. I want to see him prosecuted like he prosecuted me. At the VERY least I want a chance to beat the shit out of him.” 

“Hey? GUYS!!” Ezekiel yelled, “CAN SOMEONE PLEASE COME OVER HERE!!!” Beelzebub sighed and stood up out of his chair. 

“We’ll talk about it.” The demon lord said. “Let me go handle whatever this is about…”

+++

“And he didn't even hesitate, when he found me there. He was in tears, he unlocked me immediately, he freed me, he made sure I was alright… he didn't even worry about his own safety at all. He was like, I need to get you out of here!! Let's go to Earth! You'll be safe there, and I'd rather take my chances in Hell’s courts rather than stay in a place like this that would do this to you!” Arseni lied, sitting at the table with a mug of hot cocoa in its hands. “It was so kind of him. And he let me rest in his office while he pulled classified files specifically to share with Hell’s authorities, when we arrived. If it weren't for him I would have been in that cage until Raphael decided he was bored of me and killed me.” It concluded. 

“Are you really believing this shit?!?!” Edon said, gesturing to Tahir (who was tied down tightly to a pew with unholy chains, gagged, blindfolded, and had Toby’s noise cancelling headphones put over his ears) and to the demon lords in attendance. “Really?? There is NO fucking way!!!”

“Yeah… Arseni, buddy… that sounds like a lie.” Azazel said. “It was especially suspicious when you said that he ‘didn’t even ask for ANY sexual favors in return.’ Why even specify?”

“Because I didn’t want you thinking that he did!” It replied, crossing its arms. 

“Why are you defending him!!!” Edon demanded.

“Because he saved my life!”

“He also RUINED mine!”

“Great! So, you’re even, then!” Arseni happily said, as if that settled it. “I think that’s plenty enough to clear his name. So, what do you all say we just untie him and let him live his little life down here?” Azazel sighed. 

“No. Absolutely not.” He responded. “He’s going to trial, and we’re going to find out what REALLY happened up there. I don’t believe for a second that he was even looking for you in that office. That wouldn’t even make sense, for all he knew, you could have already been in Hell, and there would have been no reason for him to suspect Raphael.” 

“Raphael has quite the reputation!” Arseni argued. 

“Yeah, well, tell it to the judge.” Azazel said.

“Who’s the judge?”

“Please don’t take this the wrong way, but, I’m not going to tell you, because then you’d try and fuck him.” Azazel said. 

“...You know me too well.” It said, crossing its arms. “Can we at least let him have something to eat before he goes down to Hell?”

“They’ll feed him down there.” Beelzebub said. “Right now we just need to make sure he doesn’t escape while we figure out how to transport him.” They all shifted their gaze towards Tahir, who was lying there in the pew, not even bothering to struggle. 

“He’s not going to escape.” Arseni said. “He has nowhere to go. Can we PLEASE just untie him, and let him talk? Maybe put some pants on the guy? I really think you could just drop his charges right now if you just hear the story and look at the documents.”

“...Fine.” Beelzebub said. “But, one of us has to be within easy range to grab him if he tries anything, NOT you, Arseni.” Arseni put its hand down. “Azazel. You do it. I don’t want to touch that thing, I hate angels.” Azazel and Ezekiel removed Tahir’s bindings and sensory deprivation gear, and Beelzebub instructed Edon to leave and stand guard outside the door, just in case, and also to prevent it from hurting him. It grumbled angrily about it, but obeyed.

The blindfold came off, and Tahir blinked, looking around the sanctuary and at the demons and human in front of him. He’d really expected Ezekiel to look more feminine, and was shocked to see that he was a fairly masculine looking guy despite the shoulder length curly hair he had. He didn’t LOOK like what Tahir thought about when he thought “sex worker”, but, Tahir did not exactly have the best ideas about sex workers. Beelzebub was difficult for Tahir to look at, with his buglike body segments and too many legs… it freaked him out a little bit. But Azazel? 

Tahir’s reaction to seeing Azazel for the first time was very similar to Ezekiel’s. Holy shit. Holy shit!!!! He almost didn’t even mind that he’d just been very unceremoniously tied down to that pew by him. If he’d known, he probably would have resisted, at least a little bit, just to feel him pin his hands behind his back with more force. 

“You better sit pretty right there, angelface.” He said, leading Tahir to his chair. “I really don’t want to have to chase you down, yeah? And Edon is right outside the door. I will not be stopping it from hurting you.”

“U-um…. Okay.” He said. “I assure you, your… grace… I will not try anything.”

“Polite,” He said, “but wholly unnecessary. Please don’t call me that.” He said. “Brings back some bad memories.”
“My apologies!!!” He said, looking down at the table. “What… what should I call you…? I know some demons use Majesty, or Lord…?” Azazel laughed. “Um!!! Dux??? Prince??? Excellency, Praetor…?”

“Just use my name. Azazel.” He said. “That’s Beelz over there, and that’s Ezekiel. He isn’t going to respond much to you because your boss is screaming in his head right now. But if you REALLY wanna use a title… Hey, I ain’t opposed to Lord. Or Excellency, really.” He turned his head to give Arseni a look. Arseni gave him the same look back. 

“It’s Beelzebub.” The demon lord said. “Do not call me Beelz.”

“Yeah, listen to Beelz.” Azazel said.
“...Who is screaming in his head?” Tahir said. 

“Raphael??” Azazel replied.

“Raphael is NOT my boss!” Tahir argued. “Arseni was my boss! And then nobody was! I-I mean, I guess by default, Raphael would technically be my boss in the interim, but… Nothing was official!! I was not ever signed as an underling!” He insisted. “I only went to him twice, and neither time was I explicitly ordered to do so. Truly, I will tell you everything! Please, I implore you, your Excellency, please, do you know any Seraphim? I would be honored to have my thoughts continually monitored and verified for authenticity and veracity, during this interview!” 

“Wow. Um… yeah, I guess we can do that… Ezekiel, can you go find Aethriel?” Azazel asked. “That’s actually a pretty good idea.”

“Is this going to be an official first interview for court?” Beelzebub asked, “If so, I want to call at least one more high ranking demon in here, and ideally another human…”

“What?” Ezekiel said. “I know you’re talking, but, it’s really hard to make out the specific words-”

“GO GET AETHRIEL AND ISAIAH!” Beelzebub said, loudly and slowly. “I will also call in Penemue. I think his recordkeeping skills along with his rank would be beneficial to have at hand. You two stay here and WATCH that little pervert, I will be no longer than ten minutes…” 

Azazel and Arseni watched as Ezekiel and Beelzebub left the sanctuary, leaving them in charge of Tahir. 

“...Your Excellency, huh?” Azazel said, more to Arseni than Tahir. “He really has a thing for titles, then? I thought you were just fucking with me.”

“He’s nervous, give him a break.” Arseni said. Tahir fought to keep his eyes down, and eventually, just tried to keep them shut, instead, with his head down.

“Yeah, I dunno, man. He seems a little more than just nervous.”

“Well, I mean. He’s also in heat, and… okay. I did lie a little bit. We had like… 25% of a sexual encounter directly before coming here, we had to stop because I was worried Raphael was going to find our hiding spot. So. His ass is lubed up, he’s been edged to tears, and he’s been making do in Heaven for the past two days with just his hand and lamp oil. And it’s probably not too comfortable to sit in these hard wooden chairs, either, I spanked him pretty good... ” It said. “So. PLEASE, go easy on him. He’s really trying to hold it together.”

“I-I thought you were not going to tell them… about that.” He said, weakly. 

“Shhh. It’s okay.” Arseni said. “Mommy knows what she’s doing.” He rested his forehead on the table. This is not helping!!! He thought, on the off chance Arseni was looking through his thoughts right now. I hate you!!! I want a different lawyer!!

“Is he, like… gonna be okay?” Azazel said. “Does he need a minute? I mean, it would have to be supervised, but, I do get it. I wouldn’t want my day in court to be a day I’m deep into heat with no relief.” Tahir really did try to suppress the thoughts he was having about Azazel, in case he could read them, but he really was failing, miserably. He wondered how much different in size the demon was to Arseni, down there. He wondered if he’d be gentle, like Arseni was, or if he’d be willing to be a little more rough… but above all, he had the overwhelming urge to be on his knees under the table right now. “If he needs to jerk off for a second… needs like, a bowl of ice water to put it in, I dunno… I’ll supervise.” That didn’t help. Images of those beautiful clawed fingers gripping the back of his head, or… oh, fuck, what about around his HALO, to force his head lower to take MORE of whatever the demon was packing flashed through his mind. The premise of Azazel graciously allowing him to touch himself while he performed such an act was making him almost dizzy with want. 

“I-I am alright.” He lifted his head off the table. “I apologise on behalf of Arseni, who I believe is making comments about me that are untrue, and, I truly am not asking for or requesting any sort of accommodation or break.” He forced himself to say. The demon looked down at him, and then at the scrap of fabric tied around his waist, which did not exactly leave much to the imagination.
“So you’re not in heat?” 

“...I mean to say that you do not need to go easy on me, Your Excellency.” He said. Azazel gave him a look. “I-I didn’t mean it like that!! I mean, I am more than capable of answering any questions you have for me! I meant, like, easy questions!! You can ask hard- I mean, difficult questions! If you so choose to, your Excellency.” He concluded. “I am not intentionally being difficult or insolent. I wish only to comply with your questioning and your orders.”

“Is he always like this?” Azazel asked. Arseni sighed. 

“I just told you, he’s NERVOUS.” The angel said, annoyed. “But yeah, pretty much, if he’s trying to be professional, anyway.”

“I like it.” He said, after a long pause. 

“Don’t you fucking start that.” Arseni said. “You know I’m just going to be the one who gets in trouble…”

“What are you talking about?” Azazel said. “I’m just saying I like that he’s being professional! What, I’m not allowed to be impressed by the defendant’s decorum, in such a trying circumstance?”

“I don’t like your TONE.” Arseni replied. If I didn’t get to fuck him, you shouldn’t be able to either! 

“Well, you can dislike my tone all you want.” He took a sip from Arseni’s cup of hot chocolate that it had left within grabbing distance of the goat demon. He reached over Tahir to do so, giving the little angel an even better idea of just how much bigger he was than him. Tahir swallowed. “You sure you don’t need a break? It’s really no trouble at all.” He asked. “You really look like you’re burning up down there, boything.”
“I-I, I will be alright, Your Excellency.” He repeated. God, how he wanted that break, but… there was no way he could admit that!! Not to Azazel!! Not in front of Arseni!! And he wouldn't be able to prevent himself from begging the demon to help him out even if he did work up the courage to ask for a break! Instead, he settled on putting his head back down on the table, listening to Azazel and Arseni’s idle banter about how cute he was. Not helping!!!!!

A few minutes later, Ezekiel returned with Aethriel and Isaiah (on crutches, this time, instead of his chair,) followed closely by Penemue and Beelzebub. They took their places at the table, all except for Aethriel, who stood awkwardly behind Tahir for a minute. 

“Excuse me, Your Grace,” It said, “I was informed I would need to sit next to him.”

“Why?” Arseni said. 

“To… adequately monitor him, for truthfulness…?” It said. “I need to be physically touching him, for that. It is not like mind reading where it is still semi-accurate from a distance.”

“...Oh. Okay. Azazel, move.” It said. “The Seraph wants your seat.”

“Nope. Not gonna happen.” He said. “Remember? Beelz said I gotta be here in case he tries anything.” Arseni stared him down. Azazel did a very good job of maintaining his professional composure. Aethriel just stood there, confused. 

“Your grace…?”

“FINE.” It said, standing up, and moving one seat over. Aethriel pulled out the chair and flipped it over, perching itself on one of the bars Isaiah had installed on the less Seraph-friendly chairs the Chapel had. It summoned an astral hand and used it to wave hello to Tahir, who looked at it, skeptically.

“Hello, I am Aethriel. I believe I met you once before.” It said. “You likely saw me in my human disguise only, though. I held my good friend Edon back from beating you up.”

“Yes, I remember.” He said.
“I will not lie, from what I have heard from Edon, I do not like you.” It said. “I think you have done some terrible things. However, I do believe I am able to put that aside to give an unbiased readout of your truthfulness today. Do you object to this?”

“I do not.” He replied. “Are, um… are you also going to be screening my thoughts, or is this only a truth evaluation…?”

“I will also be reading your thoughts, yes.” It replied. “However, it will not be an unfiltered transcript. I will only say out loud what you are thinking if it holds direct relevance to the case at hand. For example, I see that you did not find my human form very appealing to view.” Tahir averted his gaze. “As that information is not directly related to your alleged crimes, I would not be stating that to those in attendance. May I have your permission to touch your forehead? That is my preferred location for contact if I am to be maintaining it for the duration of this testimony.” 

“O-of course.” He said. Aethriel placed an astral hand on his forehead, and he could almost feel the cool touch wrap around his brain.

“...Oh,” It said. Tahir did his best to sit up straight and make it look like his blush was because of nervousness. “I… guess my preliminary readings WERE accurate. Okay. Well… I am ready,” It announced to the table. Tahir blushed even harder as Aethriel inserted a few thoughts of its own into his head: I understand you are likely experiencing a heat cycle right now, but, could you PLEASE try and tone it down a bit?! It is difficult to read your actual thoughts when your mind is filled with… is that Azazel facefucking you using your halo as a handle? Are you not an angel of the Lord? Stop it! I would be spraying you with a spray bottle like a cat right now if I could!

I’m sorry!!! I’m not trying to!!  He apologized, I am well aware my thoughts are disturbing and I am embarrassed of them as well!!!

“Excellent. Tahir, I think first we would like to hear about what your relationship is to Raphael.” Beelzebub said. “Wait, wait. Azazel, I told you to WATCH him, and keep him within easy capture distance.” He pointed at Tahir. 

“I’m sitting right next to him, what more do you want from me?!” He asked. 

“You don’t know what he’s capable of!” The demon Lord said, “We haven’t determined he isn’t a threat yet. One point of contact, minimum! If all I wanted was someone to sit next to him, I’d have done it myself.”

“You want me to hold him down?” Azazel asked. “...Okay, I think that’s pretty unnecessary, but, you’re the boss.” Arseni sunk down in its chair and crossed its arms as Azazel placed a hand on Tahir’s hip and thigh area, near the knot of his improvised rag skirt. His arms were tied to the back of the chair, so, it was an understandable place to choose.

“That’s better. Okay, now, tell us what your relationship to Raphael is.” Tahir took a deep breath to try and collect himself for a moment. He closed his eyes tightly, and then opened them again, thinking some kind of apology to Aethriel as Azazel’s hand pressed down, pinning his leg to the wood. 

“It is very limited.” He said. “The first time I went to see him was a huge mistake. I had, um… well… I had just had an… encounter, with a coworker, and-”

“He had sexual intercourse with Metabelle, a Cherub who also sat on the Sexual Immorality Council.” Aethriel stated. 

“...Right. And she was talking about how excited she was to brag to her friends about our… encounter. I felt threatened by this, as if my position was at stake, and I sought out Arseni first, who turned me away at the door. So, I felt as though I had little other option for anyone to go to. So I sought out Raphael.” He waited for a comment from Aethriel, and got nothing. So he continued, “I-I, um, I came to him and I confessed what I had done, and he forgave me.”

“He was warned not to do so quite vaguely by Arseni, and lied to Raphael and said that he only thought about doing indecent things with Metabelle, in fear of being punished more severely.” Aethriel said.

“...Yes… but, I knew that if I told the whole truth I would be felled. I just wanted protection, I wanted to get ahead of all this.”

“What was your intention, there, exactly?” Azazel asked. “And were you aware of his crimes?”

“Crimes?” Tahir said. “Um… well… my intention was to have someone powerful speaking on my behalf if Metabelle did indeed spread rumors… truths, I guess… about our encounter. So that if I were to be put on trial, he would… um… speak for me… and no, I was unaware of his violence.” Tahir said. Azazel’s thumb began to slowly, almost imperceptibly move over the fabric covering his thigh. Tahir had to fight to sit STILL, and not squeeze his legs together like he so desperately wanted to, for any semblance of relief. He couldn’t even tell if the demon was doing it on purpose or just adjusting his grip.

“He was aware that Raphael harmed you, Azazel, and also Asmodeus.” Aethriel said. “But he was unaware of the sexual nature of Raphael’s crimes against other angels.”

“Everyone is aware of the Watcher thing!!!” Tahir argued. Aethriel said nothing else, but trained one of its many eyes on him with one of those unreadable Seraph expressions, as his gaze briefly turned towards Azazel (who’d stopped moving his thumb AT the junction of his hip and thigh) and he was unable to suppress his thoughts of being picked up, bent over this table, revealed to be the slut he was and fucked in front of everybody… 

Isaiah could read the expression quite easily. It meant, “Jesus fucking Christ, I know it is weird that I am reading your thoughts but man, what is going ON in your head?! You live like this?!”

“Okay, any other involvement?” Penemue asked.

“Um… then… I um…” He sighed, closing his eyes. “I… I very STUPIDLY came BACK to his office, after the Christmas Party, with, um… with intentions to… strengthen our relationship.”

“He went to Raphael’s office with intentions to seduce him.” Aethriel corrected. Tahir stared it down but did not make any move to deny this.

“...Oh my God. That is so fucking stupid.” Isaiah said. “Are… are you OKAY?”

“I… I’m fine!” He said. “Nothing happened between us! I got too nervous to actually… flirt… and he ended up promoting me to fill Arseni’s previous role. He went to get me the keys to my new office and rooms, and… he left Arseni’s phone on the desk, which started ringing… I didn’t pick up, but I mentioned it, and he told me that he’d taken it from Arseni but that Arseni had gotten away. When I inquired about him submitting the phone to evidence, he made it seem like he did not want to submit it because he didn’t want me to be offended or made to feel uncomfortable by the contents of the device.” He closed his eyes tightly, bracing for Aethriel to say something about how horny he’d been, but it didn’t. “Really?!?? Nothing??”

“It is not relevant.” Aethriel said. “He is telling the truth. Go on.”

“Fine! And I kept asking him to submit it anyway because he mentioned there was content on the device relating to me. He declined. That was the end of it.”

“Then… wait. How did you find Arseni?” Beelzebub asked. 

“...I… well… um…” He started. “I… I went to go open my new rooms and was unable to do so because Raphael gave me the wrong keys. I was tired and did not want to bother him, so I used the keys to open his lockbox in the Archives to find the actual keys I needed.”

“...Please tell me you kept the wrong keys.” Azazel said. How is his voice so UNCHANGED?!! He is practically feeling me up right now…! I’m sorry, Aethriel…

He is not feeling you up, I am LOOKING at his hand. It thought back. He is holding you down like he was asked! Stop it! I am spraying you with the spray bottle again!

“... I kept one keyring of the wrong keys, yes.” He said. “B-but… I um…. I saw things, in the lockbox. Identification cards for humans. Hair and feathers from humans and angels. Halo sections. Strange clothing. It was weird. I was… confused. So I simply brushed it off and went to his office, unlocked some drawers and found my keys… and I was going to leave, but um… then I heard a sound, and I figured, I’d already done something bad, breaking into the office… might as well explore…”

“That is a lie.” Aethriel said. “Try again.” Tahir took a deep breath.

“...I… I searched through his drawers because I wanted to review the evidence from Arseni’s cell phone.” He said. “I wanted to… um… see what information it was sharing about me…”

“He wanted to masturbate to content on the device.” Aethriel supplied. “Which he did, in Raphael’s desk chair, at the desk. It was to audio of a phone call with Isaiah in which Isaiah’s audio was cut out, leaving only Arseni’s side of the conversation. He picked that one because it was tagged as ‘JOI’ and ‘Corruption’-”

“HOW IS THAT RELEVANT!!!” Tahir yelled, doing his best to whip around in Aethriel’s direction, fighting his bindings a little bit. Azazel pressed down harder on his thigh, as if he was even capable of escape, as if the extra pressure was really doing much to hold him back. His claws grazed the inside of his thigh and Tahir almost cried in frustration.
“Chill.” The demon said. Tahir tried his best to breathe deeply a few more times and calm himself down. “Go on, Aethriel.”

“...That is about it. I mean. Do you want more details?” It asked. “I have more details, I just do not think they are relevant.”

“I’ll tell you when to stop.” He said. Tahir looked at the wood grain pattern of the table very intently.

“Um… okay… he took down an oil lamp from the wall to use the contents for lubricant, and must have accidentally activated the first part of a mechanism to open up the cage Arseni was being kept in. Then he-”

“That’s enough.” Beelzebub said. “Aethriel, would you please switch to interpreting veracity for Arseni for a moment?”

“Of course.” It said, placing an astral hand on each of its four foreheads, now. Beelzebub directed his questioning at Arseni. 

“Then what happened?”

“...The cage opened, and he let me out.” It said, dryly. It was still staring daggers at a very unaffected Azazel, who was a perfect picture of composure and professionalism right now, WAY more than he usually was. 

“After it begged and pleaded with him to do so for almost ten minutes.” Aethriel added. 

“But he let me out. And then we retired to his office so that I could rest before we went to Earth.” Aethriel began to say something, so Arseni continued. “And also we made out on the couch in his office and considered having sex, but decided not to because Raphael was close by.” 

“...That is true.” It said.

“So it was all an accident, and he had to be convinced to let you out?” Penemue asked.

“...It was a coincidence, yeah.” Arseni said. “But who cares? We’re here now, aren’t we?”

“Tahir, do you have any other connection to Raphael?” Azazel asked, beginning to move his thumb again, tracing back and forth over the soft fabric. Aethriel put an astral hand to his head once more. 

“N-no.” 

“That is the truth.” Aethriel confirmed. 

“Did Arseni promise you any goods, services, or other compensation for releasing it?”

“Yes.”

“What was that promise?” Azazel asked.

“...It offered me many things and I declined them all.”

“That is a lie.” Aethriel said. “You did decline its offers of sexual favors and material goods, but you did not decline its offer to testify on your behalf in Hell’s court system.”

“Well, I mean, yes, I would want it to testify truthfully about me!” He argued. 

“But Arseni already lied for you, earlier...” Beelzebub said. 

“I did not ask it to!” He said. “I really did not ask it for anything! I just wanted to be safe, here, safe from Raphael, safe from PRISON! Safe from pain! I have no idea what is going to happen to me, and I didn’t ask for anything because I didn’t KNOW about anything!!” He cried. 

“All of that is true, but…” Aethriel sighed. “Technically this is not STRICTLY relevant, but, you did request to have sex with it, in your office.”

“That was UNRELATED!!!” Tahir argued, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. Azazel’s claws dug into his hip RIGHT as he said the word ‘unrelated,’ forcing him to pronounce the word all weird as his head spun.

“Unrelated to what?” Aethriel asked.

“Unrelated to the conditions of me releasing it from the cage!!”
“...Okay, that is true.” Aethriel confirmed. “Be more specific next time.” 

“Did it honor this request?” Azazel asked, suppressing a smirk. 

“...NO.” Tahir said. Aethriel paused for a second.

“That… is true.” It said. “Technically speaking.”

“Why did you release it?” Beelzebub asked. 

“Because I felt as though it was the morally correct action to take.” He said. “I… I felt that it would be immoral to leave it there knowing that it would be hurt if I took no action. And because I… I feel strong feelings of affection, for Arseni, on a personal level.” He confessed. Aethriel made no comment. “Do… do you have any other questions, right now?!” Tahir asked the panel in front of him, as they all just kind of sat there looking at each other, thinking. Penemue was updating the court records, and Ezekiel just sat there with his eyes closed, looking like he was in pain.

“Honestly, no.” Beelzebub said. “I think the rest of the questioning will have to be done in court. But, I mean, as far as I’m concerned… I think it’s safe to say that you didn’t extort Arseni. You’ll just have to be tried to determine if you are a double agent or a threat, and for the harm you did as a judge on the Sexual Immorality Council. Anyone disagree?” Silence. “Penemue?”

“I agree with you.” He said. Everyone seemed to be fine with this.

“Okay. Well. Thank you everyone. Thank you, Aethriel. Azazel will now take the accused down to PAC for holding until trial.” Arseni looked really pissed off at that, but said nothing. Azazel briefly locked eyes with it, but revealed no expression on his face.

“Wait, wait!!!” Tahir exclaimed, “What even are my charges?!”

“You’re charged with being a shitty judge.” Azazel explained. 

“...Those are my official charges?” He asked.

“Yeah. Look, says it right here.” He grabbed a paper off Penemue’s large pile of paperwork to show him. There, in big letters under CHARGES, ‘extortion’ had been crossed out, and underneath it, ‘shitty judge’ was placed in identical writing, not crossed out. 

“...You’ve got to be fucking joking…”

+++

Azazel, under the direction of Beelzebub, blindfolded the poor little Virtue and untied his bindings from the chair, leaving the bindings on his wrists, ankles, and wings still in place. He lifted the angel over his shoulder and made his way up to the pulpit, where all the summoning circles had been placed down dutifully by Ezekiel many weeks ago. 

“A-are you taking me directly to jail?” Tahir asked, painfully aware of how vulnerable he was right now. His erection was pressed into Azazel’s shoulder, not like it was his FAULT or anything: Tahir couldn’t be less in control of this situation. 

Azazel sighed, and hopped through a portal directly to his workshop down in Hell. 

“No. I have to get changed, first.” He said. “If they start asking ME questions, I don’t want to show up in sweatpants.” The demon set him down on his feet on what felt like a cold stone floor. He could hear Azazel shuffling around throughout the room, opening and closing drawers. 

“Can you please take the blindfold off?” He asked, quietly. The sounds stopped. Azazel approached the angel, and acquiesced, removing his blindfold. 

“Consider that my apology, by the way.” The demon said, allowing him a moment to adjust to the change in lighting.  

“...Apology?” He asked, scanning the highly decorated piercing studio with an expression of mild terror in his eyes. 

“For fucking with you during the questioning.” He pulled a loincloth out of a drawer and set it on the piercing bench. “At first I wasn’t really TRYING to fuck with you, but… you were squirming around so fucking adorably when I just adjusted my positioning a little bit. You were practically begging me to touch you more. I couldn’t help myself.” He admitted. 

“I… um… I am so so sorry, Your Excellency,” He said, putting his head down. “I did not mean to move so much, I, I’m just-”
“Struggling?” He completed the thought. “You’re in a SHITTY position! I get it!” Azazel said. “Really, I do. You’re what, two days into heat? How long do your heats usually last?”

“...Um… like… four or five days…” He said.

“Yeah, you’re at the WORST part of your heat, you’ve been left to deal with it completely alone, you’ve been manhandled and fucked with and tied up and spanked by demons and angels who are much bigger and stronger than you… it must be torture. I feel for you.” The demon said. Tahir did not reply. “You good if I change in front of you? I could put the blindfold back on if you want.”

“I’m… good… with it.” He managed to say.
“Suit yourself.” Azazel said. He sat down on his rolling chair and pulled the sweatpants off, making a good show of letting his erection catch and swing up as he pulled the waistband down. Tahir wasn’t trying to stare. He really wasn’t. But he was intimately aware that he could just… he could just get on his knees RIGHT NOW and Azazel would be at dick sucking height. 

He also hadn’t realized what a THING he had for foreskin. By God, that thing was fucking beautiful. He struggled to swallow the saliva in his mouth, and furthermore, to keep his mouth closed. He wanted his tongue under it. He wanted to be COMMANDED to do that, to defile his holy mouth, to lick and taste and EXPERIENCE the majesty in front of him. He wanted that cock in his mouth terribly, he could picture the way the barbs would feel touching his lips, he could picture that voice telling him to relax, take it deeper… 

“...Ohhh…” He breathed, biting the inside of his cheek to force himself to remain as silent as possible.

“What?” The demon said. “See something you like, yeah?” Tahir slowly nodded, unable to stop himself. He figured at this point if he said no, it would be a pretty obvious lie. “C’mere.” The demon said. Tahir took a few steps forward. “Closer.” He said, spreading his legs. Tahir continued forwards until he was within a foot of the demon lord. “Good boy. You’re such a good listener, you know that? Real obedient. I like it.” 

“...T-thank you, your Excellency…?” He said. 

“And so, SO polite. Wow. You really are an angel.” Azazel reached up and gently tapped his halo, sending a wave of sensation down his body. “Turn around.” He commanded. Tahir did NOT need to be told twice. Without asking any follow up questions, he spun around. To his great surprise, Azazel undid the bindings on his wings, and then on his hands, leaving the longer chains around his ankles intact. “Now, I’m doin’ this to be NICE, this is me being NICE, boything…” He cautioned. “Don’t be getting any IDEAS. There's a room full of demons behind that door that would tear you to shreds if you walked through it.”

“I-I… I won’t.” He said. 

“Turn back around.” He instructed, and the angel obeyed. “Now… I believe you saw something you liked.” He reiterated. “I want you to tell me what exactly that was.”

“...Y-you.” He said, after a short pause.

“Me?” He reiterated. “You’re gonna have to be more specific than that, yeah? I can’t read those pretty thoughts of yours.”

“I-I… I really… I like… um… your… cock.” He stammered. “I… I’ve been thinking about it… through the whole questioning… I… fffffffffuck…” He fought to keep his hands at his sides, to himself. 

“Oh yeah?” Azazel asked, tilting his chin up to make him make eye contact. Tahir nodded, now horny beyond words. “You wanna get up here, yeah? You wanna get on it? You’re desperate for a demon that’s much bigger and stronger and more powerful than you to have mercy on you, and use you like the holy pocket pussy you are?” He blushed something awful and nodded yet again, shamefully this time. “Oh, well… you’re REALLY in luck, then, boything.” He teased. “C’mon. Don’t waste my time. Get up here, get in my lap.” He said. Tahir fumbled with the ties on the makeshift skirt he had on, unable to undo them fast enough. Azazel laughed at him again, pulling him forward and grabbing a knife off the table. “Hold still.” He said, slicing through the thin fabric, leaving the angel nude in front of him. 

“T-thank you, your Excellency,” He said again.

“You can thank me by getting on my lap, yeah?” He said. “C’mere. There you go… good boy.” Tahir climbed up into the demon’s lap. He picked him up and adjusted him so their erections were pressed together, and Tahir gasped as Azazel held their lengths together and began to jerk them both off. “There we go. That’s right. That’s better, hmm? Now you can actually THINK, now that you’re not burning up so badly…”

“M-mhm…” He said, melting into the too-light stimulation. He really hoped the demon was going to let him touch himself while they fucked.

“Now, I got a ton of options for lube… what do you like? Silicone? Water? I also just have straight up olive oil somewhere around here if you're old school…”

“Y-you don’t have to use lube,” He said. Azazel looked at him and stopped jerking them both off, causing Tahir to whimper from the loss of stimulation.

“...What the fuck are you talking about??” He asked. “Of course I have to use lube.”

“You’ve got all these lamps though…?” He said. 

“What??? Why the fuck- whatever.” He sighed. “I’m gonna use this shit.” He rolled the chair over to yet another drawer and pulled out a pretty nice looking bottle of lube that definitely came from the human world. “It's a silicone-water hybrid. I hope that’s fine with you.”
“I… I am okay with anything.” He said. “I mean… wow. That… is a lot nicer than what I am used to,” He said. 

“Oh, really?” The demon said, storing that piece of information away to annoy Arseni with later. “Well, I guess I’m gonna really treat ya, then. Lift your hips up, yeah?” Tahir did so, allowing the demon access to his most intimate areas. Azazel poured some lube into his hands, spreading a good deal of it on his dick by way of slowly, teasingly stroking himself in front of the angel. He used his other hand to reach between the angel’s legs and spread more lube over his hole. “Sit a little more forward, I want to put my fingers in you.”

“Um… w-what about the claws…?” Tahir asked, nervously.

“Boything… you're just gonna have to trust that I might have done this a few times before.” He replied. Tahir blushed and looked away, embarrassed, as Azazel pushed a finger into his entrance. He gasped as the digit breached him, and was a little surprised (but not too shocked) that the demon's claws could be folded down a bit so as to be partially retracted. 

“Aah! Please!” He made a soft noise of pleasure as the demon put in another finger and continued to stroke himself, eyes trained on Tahir’s body, making little comments at him like

“Feels good, yeah? Keep those hips up, hold yourself up, don't you fall down on me. Yeah, just a little longer… I know, I know you really want it… shhh… I just gotta get you all prepped first…”

“Please, please your Excellency may I touch myself!!!” He asked. As of now he has his arms folded up by his chest, trying to keep them out of the way, counterbalancing himself by flapping his wings occasionally if he felt like he was gonna fall backwards. Azazel steadied him and took one of his hands, placing it on his shoulder for a more solid anchor point.

“Why the hell are you asking me?” He replied, still lazily jerking himself off. “Yeah, I mean, do whatever. Why would I care?”

“S-some Cherubim care!!!” He said, thinking of Arseni, who for some reason or another had a THING about that. 

“Good thing I'm no fuckin’ Cherub anymore, then, yeah?” He replied. “Y'know what? Fuck it. Now it's an order. Jerk yourself off for me.” He said. Tahir’s free hand flew to his dick at that, closing it around his length and beginning to touch himself, roughly, gracelessly. “I hope you know I'm not gonna be gentle.” He said.

“I… I know.” Tahir said, looking away. 

“...That just makes you want it more, doesn't it.” He said. Tahir slowly nodded. “I can't fucking believe that YOU were sitting on the sexual immorality council in HEAVEN less than 24 hours ago…” he mused. “I hope you know every demon in a thirty mile radius would want to be the one in my place right now. You're DEMON BAIT, boything.” 

“I DESERVED my place on the council!” He protested, whining as the demon curled his fingers up to hit his prostate and even more precum dripped from the tip of his cock. 

“Even though you were doing this shit, even though you were doing the EXACT things you were damning angels to Hell for?” Azazel asked. “Not that I CARE, but, Tahir, you're one of the worst sinners I know. Ezekiel is closer to being a follower of Jesus than you are.” Tahir closed his eyes. Why is this turning me on??!!!

“...I… that’s different…” He said, turning his head away. Azazel wasn't exactly sure what to make of this. Despite his arguments, Tahir didn't look any less aroused. If anything he looked MORE turned on, moving his hand faster, trying to get Azazel to put his fingers deeper inside him. 

“... I've prepared you enough.” He decided, pulling his fingers out of the angel and wiping them on the piece of fabric that had been used as a makeshift garment. “I'm gonna fuck some sense into your head, yeah? Get up. GET UP!” He commanded, startling the little angel in his lap. Tahir got up, standing there naked on the stone floor, chains around his ankles, unable to summon the willpower to stop touching himself.

Azazel got up, too, towering over the Virtue and grabbing him by the shoulder, turning him around and shoving him against the piercing table. “I'm only gonna say this once, so you better fuckin’ listen,” He said, pouring more lube over Tahir’s exposed hole. “I don't fuck around with Virtues. I don't like them. I think you're all annoying little brats, I think your belief that you are the infallible authority on what's right and what's wrong is STUPID-” He pushed his cock into the angel’s ass, slowly, pressing past that tight ring of muscle and sliding to the barbs. Tahir spread his legs wider and arched his back a little bit. 

This was exactly what he’d needed; nice, warm cock deep in his ass… strong, practiced hands firmly around his waist… something Cherub shaped whispering in his ear about how much of a fucking sinner he was… He moaned and tried to press his hips back, wanting Azazel to start thrusting, but was held firmly in place by the hands on his lower back and hips. 

“I think your prettiness is overstated and that pretty much any given human is a better fuck than one of you. That being said,” He pulled back a few inches, “Consider your ass my property, for the next, eh, say, 10 to 15 minutes. We don't have a lot of time. And we keep this between us, yeah, boything? You don't go telling all your little friends about this. I have a reputation to uphold.” 

“I-I won't tell anyone-!” He said, and Azazel slammed back into him, holding him by the hips and fucking him HARD, like he'd asked, like he NEEDED. Tahir dug his nails into the leather of the table as the demon fucked him like an animal, practically picking him up off the ground to get more leverage.

“Y-you virtue fucks are ALWAYS doing this,” He commented, “You're all high and mighty, self righteous PRICKS, to the VERY end. And you REFUSE to admit that YOU can be judged by the same standards that YOU judge others on!” 

“P-please, faster!” He begged, and Azazel ignored him, keeping the pace that he wanted to go at, which, for the record, wasn't slow. Tahir was just a greedy slut right now.

“‘That’s different!!’” He mocked, “Do you even HEAR yourself, boything? You think Arseni and I don't TALK?! I've heard the things you've said about its Throne! You're such a FUCKING hypocrite, it makes me want to throttle you!”

“Do it!!” He said, “Fuck, please! Choke me!”

“And then you say shit like THAT!” He commented, “YOU'RE STILL DOING IT and you fail to see why people don't fucking LIKE you! How could you sit on that court with a straight face and convict angels of ‘impure thoughts’ or ‘unauthorized sexual acts’ when you yourself were getting backshots after court on the DAILY, and had been thinking about it for YEARS! Some of those angels were KILLED, Tahir!” He wasn't really listening. Azazel was sliding against his prostate with every pass, now, and he was seconds away from finally, finally getting to fucking cum. He stroked his dick faster and shifted his hips just a bit back, reveling in the way the demon's claws dug into his hips, and how he just fucked him harder as he remained silent. 

“I,, ohhh!!” He moaned softly, as Azazel growled at him in frustration. 

“You piss me off so fucking bad, and it pains me to know there's a MILLION angels and demons out there JUST LIKE YOU. And you're probably going to be acquitted by our courts because despite your position you're fucking UNAFFILIATED with any other angels of interest because you're a WEIRD SHUT IN that doesn't PARTY and believes in your own goddamn myth!!!” 

Tahir felt his muscles tighten as he came, hard, around Azazel’s cock. He whimpered and gasped and closed his eyes tight as he painted the side of the table with silvery white cum, continuing to touch himself through the orgasm, still jerking himself off with wild, unpracticed movements. It was fucking adorable, which just kind of pissed off Azazel even more. How is this piece of shit SO FUCKING ENTICING???

“Look! Look at that shit! I'm back here degrading your moral character and you're cumming all over my table about it!” He complained. “I hope you know I'm not going to stop fucking you until I'VE had my fill. You're walking out of here with your ass filled with demon cum, I don't give a fuck what they say at PAC. For all anyone can prove, Beelz did it.” 

“Ffuck! Ah! Please, please please please your Excellency, please cum inside me!” He pleaded. 

“Shut the fuck up!” He said, continuing to thrust. “God, you're annoying! And the worst part is… The fucking WORST part is, you're more demon than ME.” He said. “All I did was fall in love and have a special interest in metalworking! You're like… ACTUALLY evil! Fuck! All Kokabel did was teach people about the STARS! Penemue taught people how to WRITE! All of us, all the Watchers, we just wanted to free the humanity we loved so much from being stupid livestock shackled to an uncaring and selfish God! Well WHERE THE FUCK IS HE NOW? WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW?” The demons in the open studio could probably hear him, now, and he didn't give a fuck at this point. 

“Dead!” Tahir replied. “He's fucking DEAD! I'm sorry!!! I'm so fucking sorry! I fucked up! I was wrong!” Tears pricked in his eyes. “I-I, can you really blame me?! I'm like 300 years old!!! 66% of my life has been nothing but indoctrination!! I-I’m just NOW learning about pleasure, like, a few months ago, it's only by coincidence that I ended up f-falling so soon after…! Who's to say I wouldn't have turned away on my own!!!! Seen my error!!! Corrected it!!! Defected!!! Quit!!! How am I any different than Arseni, other than that I'm a LOT younger!” Azazel stopped moving.

“.... You're fucking 300?????” He asked, shocked. “HOLY SHIT! Wait!!! Wait a second! Jesus Christ! You're barely out of academy!” 

“Yeah!!! I graduated class of 1974!” He said. “... Why'd you stop?” 

“...Dude!” He said. “I'm like… I'm like 20 times your age!”

“Everyone keeps saying that!!” He complained. “Iraa and Jaasiel and Arseni, now you!! I'm a fucking adult!” He stomped his foot. “We're both immortal and we're both adults!”

“It… it doesn't. I just. I… I was under the impression you've been doing this for… longer!” He said.

“Well, I haven’t!” He replied. “And I’m SORRY. I… I just… it’s a lot to take in, my moral compass has been fucked with a million ways in such a short time… I… I know it isn’t an excuse… I just… I don’t know what is right and what is wrong! I was clearly wrong before! THIS is good! Sex is fucking amazing! And…! I just.!!! I need time to LEARN about what I’ve been wrong about!!!” He explained. 

“...Yeah… okay. You uh. You should definitely say that in court, then.” He offered. He pulled out.

“...Why are you stopping???” He asked. 

“I… I dunno. The mood is lost, to me, now.” He said, turning around to grab something to clean up with. He opened a cabinet and took out a few rags, throwing one onto the piercing table next to Tahir. “You’re hot and whatever, but… you’re too young for me… 1974… how the FUCK did they even let you SIT on that council??”

“Are you fucking serious?” Tahir said, pushing himself up off the table. “Don’t you have sex with humans?! Isn’t that your THING?”

“Well yeah, but, that’s different.” He said. Tahir gave him a look that only a fellow demon truly could. 

Chapter Text

Over the next couple weeks, things got a lot calmer around the Chapel. From the contacts they had in Heaven, Team Hell learned that the place was in total disarray, with two Lust Council members felled and several thousand angels defected, as well as a nonexistent supply of alcohol and birth control. God was furious. Earth was taking the heat a little bit, but, when wasn’t it? Lucifer was more than pleased with how all of this had gone. Even he, who was typically all about action, was content to “sit back and watch the fireworks” so to speak.

The humans were doing pretty well too. Isaiah had finally been able to get fitted for a prosthetic down in Hell, months earlier than he would have been able to on Earth, as his healing process had been boosted exponentially by Aethriel’s dutiful care of him. Arseni was still on the hook to pay for it all, which it had been doing, between excursions to PAC to meet with Tahir as his lawyer and trips to court. It was a little upset that it had been so busy with everything down here, that it hadn’t really been able to ENJOY Earth yet…

Toby got magic top surgery in Hell and had really been enjoying going around shirtless. He’d also started testosterone, and was very pleasantly surprised when his prescriber (A demon who used to be a guardian angel) was not shot in the head or strangled or otherwise murdered. He was pretty excited about the whole situation.  

Ezekiel was able to quiet the voices in his head by seeking out Hermani’s advice. The demon had taken pity on him, and had exchanged with him an angelic mind protection amulet for the promise of a custom set of nudes. This had been a trade offer Ezekiel was more than eager to take, and spent the next three days doing little else than sleeping and taking a shitton of nudes. A lot of those nudes that didn’t make the final cut (the final cut of the top quality content and an hour’s worth of curated video had been sent to Hermani directly along with a coupon book Ezekiel had made that was good for a few free blowjobs, but, he felt like there was something missing…) got sent directly to the Watcher Orgy Group Chat, which had been kind of dry lately. The new nudes livened it up, though.

# Watchers Gone Wild Orgy Planning: Prophet Edition

Ezekiel> Hey guys, here’s all the nudes I took that AREN’T part of the custom set which is for Hermani’s eyes only. Idk if anyone checks this anymore but, some of these are half decent. (Images: Over 50 themed nudes, ranging from simple naked pictures to a wax play set where Ezekiel had somehow managed to put a taper candle up his ass and light it, posed upside down on top of the church organ at the Chapel.) 

Baraqiel>> Did we ever figure out what other humans need to be involved for this thing, or…?

Arteqoph>> I got nothing. 

Kokabel>> Isaiah already opted out. I asked. 

Baraqiel>> Anyone talk to Toby?

Kokabel>> He said maybe.

Ezekiel> He’s gonna say no. For him, “maybe” usually means “I’m gonna ghost your ass.”

Arteqoph>> got any other humans that you know?

Ezekiel> Guys, it’s fine. I can just be the only one, no big deal.

Baraqiel>> Last time we did this, about two hundred years ago, it was a bit of a disaster. I don’t think u can handle us all.

Ziqel>> I can attest to this.

Baraqiel>> U really don’t know ANY other humans? 

Ezekiel> YOU don’t know any other humans??? Isn’t that your thing??

Baraqiel>> U ARE one! If any of us should know other humans it should be ur ass!

Ezekiel> Well I don’t! Sorry! 

Azazel>> I just don’t think you can handle ten dicks at once, boything. Maybe we should call it off.

Ezekiel> No, wait! I got a pussy, an ass, a mouth, and two hands. That’s five dicks right there. As long as half of you are content to wait your turn for like ten minutes it should be fine. 

Kasdeya>> Dibs on his pussy.

Kokabel>> Dibs on his ass!!!

Penemue>> Dibs on his dominant hand?

Ziqel>> I’m taking his ass first!

Ezekiel> Alright, okay, I get it! I’ll try and find another human! But I can make no promises, okay? Humans don’t really LIKE me! 

Ezekiel sighed, putting down his phone. He'd figure the orgy thing out later. Right now he STILL felt like there was something missing from what he'd given to Hermani in return for the amulet, this thing was NICE. He'd even tested it out with Aethriel and found that it couldn't break through the barrier it created, even though it wasn't TECHNICALLY an angel anymore… Aethriel and Edon weren't entirely sure WHAT they were considered at this point. But neither of them were too keen on experiencing hellfire to complete the transformation, so to speak. Regardless of if Aethriel was a demon or not, it was the only being Ezekiel could think of to ask about that, or about what kind of sacrifices demons were into, as he already knew Edon would say “Grape soda” or something else that wouldn't go over well with a watcher with a refined palate... But Aethriel was probably BUSY, too… 

And he didn’t want to bother Baraqiel again. He was still kind of worried about the fact the demon hadn’t hit him up yet about that electro scene he’d wanted to do. 

He was just about to dial Arseni’s number when the angel itself walked through the front doors of the Chapel, slamming them shut behind it and frustratedly sitting itself down on the couch, stripping out of its street clothes and transforming back into true form.

“Ezekiel!!!” It shouted, not noticing he was directly above it in the loft. “Isaiah! Toby??? I don’t care which one of you comes down here, I just need to TALK to a human that isn’t STUPID!!!”      

“I like to think I’m not stupid!” Ezekiel said, coming down the stairs. “What’s going on?”

“Where the FUCK do you people get weed around here??” It asked. “I can’t find a single dispensary in Hell that will sell to angels!!”

“What? That doesn’t make any sense. Aethriel brings us weed from Hell all the time!” He replied. 

“What?! How?!” Arseni sat upright on the couch. 

“I don’t know, I’m usually not in Hell! Maybe it’s just you, y’know, because you’re ARSENI.” He said. Arseni sighed. Until its court date, most of Hell wouldn’t really know about its role in the attempted murder of Raphael.

“My reputation in Hell isn’t the best, still, I suppose… Ugh. Well, how do you get weed, here, then, without the use of portals to Hell?”
“Where were you getting it before?” Ezekiel asked. 

“I grew my own stuff in Heaven,” It said, “And sometimes my lovely rum runners would bring me up some flower...”

“Holy shit, you grew weed in heaven?! Fuck, I’ve been trying to convince Isaiah to let me start a growhouse in the Chapel but he’s too worried we’d get raided by the cops since it’s illegal here…. How about this, I’ll give you weed right now, and you help me convince Isaiah it’ll be FINE to grow like… I dunno, just ten to fifty plants! I’d love to grow weed that was bred in heaven. That’s just… that just sounds so fucking cool.” 

“I don’t know how responsible that would be, human…” Arseni replied, crossing its arms. 

“Oh, come on! When have YOU ever done anything responsible?” He said. Arseni considered this carefully.

 “I had one thousand years to breed the most refined, high thc shit imaginable up there. The leaves on my plants were PURPLE all the way through, one hit of that would put a little thing like you in a coma.” It argued. “The seeds I initially planted all those years ago came from Samyaza’s personal stash, and, I mean, you’ve talked to the guy, you know he doesn’t fuck around when it comes to agriculture.”

“This is only intriguing me further.” He said. Arseni sighed. 

“FINE! I’ll talk to him…”

“YES!”
“But! Before I do that, you need to get me some fucking weed. Right now.” It demanded. 

“Fine. I’ll show you what I’ve got. Follow me.” He said. Arseni got off the couch and followed him upstairs to the loft. “Oh, yeah, also, I wanted to ask you, what kind of things do demons like as sacrifices? I don’t want to ask a demon because then it’s going to seem impersonal.” He said.

“Umm… well, you can’t go wrong with nice food. Several pounds of steak is a good bet, ooh, or roast pork?” It mused. 

“I guess I can do that.” He said. “There’s a place down the street that does nice steak… rack ribs…. Yeah. I think I’ll do some of that.” He opened up his dresser drawer and pulled out a backpack, unzipping it and showing off the contents to Arseni. Inside was a good deal of weed, straight from hell itself, organized in baggies and little metal containers. “Pick your poison.”

“Got anything that would knock out a Cherub?” Arseni asked, half joking. “My tolerance is… high.” 

“How about this?” He pulled out a tin of something with a label on it that said ‘Horny Goat Weed.’ “I didn’t even bother opening up this one. Aethriel advised me not to even touch it directly, apparently it ‘has crack in it’ either literally or figuratively, and I’m too scared to find out which. I can’t be doing any more crack, that shit almost ruined me and also it’s a seizure trigger for me…” He explained. “You can just have this.” Arseni eagerly took the container and opened it up. 

“...This doesn’t have crack in it at all!” It complained. 

“You can tell just by looking?!” Ezekiel asked.

“ I can. You? Probably not.” The angel said. “Whatever. It’s probably pretty strong. Thank you.” Arseni got up and turned to leave.

“Hey, hey, hold on.” Ezekiel said. “You got someone in mind to smoke with, or…?”

“I was going to see if Azazel was free…” Arseni said. 

“Oh, well, I’ll save you the trouble. He’s not free. He’s with Lucifer and Gadreel and they’re working on some plan involving using volcanic energy or something to power an anti-archangel weapon.” He explained. “I on the other hand don’t have jack shit to do, my next appointment isn’t until tomorrow. I’m alone here, and, I mean… I um… I was actually about to call you and see if you wanted to hang out, anyway.” He said. Arseni considered this.

“It has been a while since I’ve smoked with a human. Or at all, really, not since the Christmas party…” It mused. “Fuck it, why not?”

They set up a little area down in the living room. Ezekiel helped Arseni connect its new phone to the speaker system and let it pick the music while he rolled a few joints. 

“If I could get my fucking rolling machine out of that evidence locker, this would be a lot faster…” It complained, watching as Ezekiel completed his task. 

“Man shut up!!! You’re JUST like Edon, it would say some shit like that to me while I’m just trying to do something nice.” He replied, handing Arseni one of the joints. “Now, please, let’s not mix these up. On the off chance that DOES have crack in it, I know you’re a doctor, and whatever, but, I don’t trust you to know what to do if I start seizing.”

“It does not have crack in it,” Arseni said, “And I take offense to that, you know. I could cure your epilepsy permanently if it were naturally caused.” It lit the joint with a snap of its fingers and took a drag.

“...I’m sorry, what?” He asked, finishing rolling his own joint. “How… what… My epilepsy IS naturally caused! I started having seizures after I cracked my damn skull open on the ground during a fight.” He explained. 

“A fight with WHO, again?” Arseni asked. 

“...An angel.” He said. 

“Exactly. Whoever you fought with did that intentionally. You’ll have seizures for the rest of your life… I mean… unless you get brain surgery about it, anyway.” Arseni blew smoke in his face deliberately. 

“Wait, how do YOU know I got in a fight with an angel?” He asked. 

“Because it’s pretty obvious. And Edon told me.” It replied. “You look like the kind of human that would KNOW his coworker is a Cherub for sure and STILL try and throw down. Bold. Stupid, but bold.”

“Oh fuck you.” He said, lighting up his joint. 

“That might work, too, honestly.” Arseni said. “I mean, are you on seizure medication right now?”

“...Yeah, but… I uh… I’m kind of running out of it, and I um… I would have to get another prescription from a doctor, which, um. Is hard to do. Because I don’t have insurance.” He said. 

“Oh, well, I mean. It’s fine, really, don’t be too worried.” Arseni explained. “It isn’t doing you any good.”
“But I haven’t had a seizure in months now!” He said. “I don’t want to ruin all that progress, I was having seizures like… at least once a month before, when I was taking it less consistently…”

“And what have you been doing, for months, now?” It asked, “Doing anything different now than you were before?”

“I mean… I’ve been living less in my car. Sleeping better. Eating food.” He listed off, “I’ve been less stressed, I’m not entirely alone all the time in Appalachia making money exclusively by having sex with dangerous and almost always armed human men. I’m-”

“You’re taking divine dick.” It cut him off. “The other stuff is probably helping, too, but, if you were having seizures while on the meds back then, and now you’re magically not… I mean… your dose didn’t change, did it?”

“...Holy shit.” He said. “Oh… oh my God. That explains so much. I was certain I was gonna fucking die at that rave, I was like, why the hell am I still conscious? I started having an aura and everything… and then…” 

“Yeah. You’re welcome, for the Throne, by the way.” It joked, already halfway through its joint.  

“But wait. Edon told me it can’t cure injuries produced through holy means.” He said. 

“Not with saliva.” Arseni explained. “Blood and tears will do it, and cum works internally for things like seizures, endometriosis, GI bleeds, liver issues, nerve pain... I can heal injuries from holy means with saliva, though, I am much higher ranked than Edon. I will admit to you that I have not exactly used that power for the most ethical things…. I love it when wayward little messengers get the lash to the neck… I have them crying in relief in my lap while I kiss their pretty skin all better…” it mused. “They’re always so teary eyed and polite… thanking me for considering them worthy, for forgiving them… apologizing for getting aroused by it-” 

“...You… you uh…” Ezekiel said. “Um… that’s a little fucked up, I think. Maybe don’t do that.” 

“It’s not like I’M the one punishing them!” It said. Ezekiel looked less than impressed. “Whatever!!!! I’m a fallen angel, sweetheart, and messenger angels are HOT. You’re gonna have to deal with it.” It finished the joint. “Roll me another one.”

“...I’ll roll you another one if you do me a favor and-” 

“What? You want me to spit in your mouth?” It said. Ezekiel had never felt his face heat up that fast before. 

“I-I was going to ask you to EXPLAIN yourself, but.. U-um…” He started.

“Uh-uh. Now you don’t get a choice, I see how fucking turned on you are.” It giggled, leaning forward, towering over him and grabbing his chin. “Open.” He opened his mouth, and Arseni spit in it. “Close.” He closed his mouth. “Swallow.” He did. Arseni let go of his chin. “There you go. Imagine, if your seizures were caused by something you were born with, that would have fixed it, permanently. Unfortunately for you, that’s only going to last you about a week or two. But I’m sure you’re having sex more often than that, so, you should be fine. Nothing to worry about.” It said. 

“...Could uh… um… I dunno…” He said, unable to maintain eye contact, “Maybe you could uh… do that again. In a week. Y’know, because you’re like, SO powerful, and stuff?” Arseni scoffed.

“Roll me another joint.” It said. Ezekiel got RIGHT on that. He rolled one pretty quickly, then rolled another, nicer one for it for after that one. “I’ll think about it.”

“I’m sorry.” Ezekiel said, holding out the nicer joint once it was done. Arseni took it from his hand.

“For what?”

“I… I dunno.” He said. “I, uh. I shouldn’t have um. Asked you that.” 

“It is really nothing.” Arseni said. “I mean, I’m a high ranking Cherub. My powers are vast, you’re almost literally asking me to spit on you while you’re on fire, and it wasn’t even YOUR idea. Shut the fuck up.” Ezekiel found himself unable to make eye contact, understanding REALLY well now how Edon must have felt being this guy’s underling for forty years. He silently finished the rest of his joint, running through every single possible thing that was probably wrong with the way he was acting and looking right now in preparation to apologise or leave immediately. “This weed is half decent, honestly... I was worried it wouldn’t affect me at all. Would be even better if I had some pretty little thing sitting up here with me, in my lap, though…” Arseni commented, feeling that the silence was getting awkward, and becoming a bit frustrated that it couldn’t read his thoughts with that damn amulet on. It sighed when he simply nodded. “So, uhh… You seem pretty nervous.”

“I… I’m… I’m just confused.” He said. 

“YOU’RE confused?” Arseni replied, lifting its heads up from its reclined position to look at him. “I’M confused!!!”

“Why are YOU confused?” He asked.

“You’ve been so obedient up until right now.” It said. “Why are you not naked in my lap?? I feel like I am making it pretty clear that I expect you to get up here and ride me.” It said. 

“O-oh! Okay, um, I didn’t- I didn’t know that’s what you were asking!!” He said, setting down his joint and taking off his shirt. “I am so sorry…”

“Your Grace.” It said. 

“What?”
“Your Grace.” It repeated, “You’re sorry… Your Grace.”

“Your… Grace?” He said. “Oh! OH, that’s your title- oh, okay! I get it!” He said. “I’m pretty fucking high.”
“I can tell.” It said. “Listen. I am fucking WIPED. This weed is not nearly as strong as what I’m used to. I’m fucking tired. I thought leaving heaven would be less work and here I am running around trying to defend the last surviving member of my harem in Hell’s court, and they won’t even allow me conjugal visits because I’m his lawyer, and it’s ‘unethical’ or whatever.” It did finger quotes for the word “unethical”. Ezekiel blushed harder and undid the button on his jeans. “And on TOP of that, I can’t even buy weed in Hell. I am NOT in the mood to put up with any bullshit. I am NOT going to be doing ANY of the work. You are going to get on my lap and ride me. You are going to call me by my correct title, EVERY time. You are NOT going to whine or complain or beg. You are NOT going to be a bitchy little brat like my Throne. You understand?” It said, reaching over and tilting his chin up towards it. 

“I understand, Your Grace.” He said. Arseni smiled at him.

“That’s fucking RIGHT.” It said. “Strip.” It commanded. Ezekiel took off the remainder of his clothing, just his jeans, underwear, and socks. “Now, I don’t want to have to lift a goddamn FINGER. You’re going to treat me like the royalty I fucking am. Okay?” 

“Yes, Your Grace,” He said again. “I await your command.” 

“Shut the fuck up.” It said. “I don’t want to hear you talk unless it’s the word “yes” and then my title, or unless I asked you a fucking question. You hear me?”