Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Leeeeeeeeeee!? I NEED YOUR HELLLLPPPPPPPP!"

Leo curled closer around his stuffy at the loud voice, feeling bad for ignoring mikey but ultimately staying hidden. 

He wasnt hiding in the little pillow fort tent he built a few days ago with the help of casey, refusing to let raph pull it down yesterday even though he wasn't a baby and didnt need a super cool comfy space blanky pillow fort to keep him safe from all the big loud world anymore. 

Definetly not. 

No, he was just cold, even after putting on a hoodie, sweatpants and fluffy bedsocks, that's all it was.

"LEO LEO LEEEEEOOOOOO."

Leo wasn't scared or overwhelmed and hiding because he was so so so tired that, he wasn't sure what to do with himself, not wanting to be seen or bother anyone. It wasn't because he felt like he needed to do something but didnt know what, so the only choice was curl up and hope he doesnt explode into fire and bugs out of his body. 

And it's not like he could've asked one of his brothers for help or comfort or care-- not that he needed it because he was a big boy, not a baby-- but if he did need it he couldnt tell them because they were all busy. 

Casey, raph and donnie were upgrading the shell raiser, april was studying for upcoming exams and mikey wasn't even home until five minutes ago-- and by that time, leo had already been out of sight for a long while. 

It's not like he didn't try to tell them either, they all ignored him which made him realised he didn't need to bother them with silly things. He could handle it on his own. 

Only, and leo refused to acknowledge this, he couldn't handle it on his own. He always needed help sooner or later when feeling itty bitty. 

But of course, he wasn't some incompetent little baby. 

See? That word right there, incompetent? 

That was a big word no stupid baby could think of! 

"Leeeeeooooo?" He curled in on himself further, whimpering when he heard footsteps close to his stary space. "Are you in the fort bro? I can hear you rustling the paper stars."

Leo closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep. That way, hopefully, if mikey did open the fort to see him, then he would go away and not be busy trying to help him. 

The orange turtle pulled the opening of the pile of pillows and blankets open carefully, only to reveal his blue brother laying on the floor of the structure, curled up around his big orca stuffy.

His other plushies were in there as well with him, but kosha had been his favourite recently. There was henry, his blue weighted owl, and then saru, his monkey lovey from when he was physically small. There was also captain ryan, who had a super annoying voice box. 

Despite being surrounded by his favourite soft friends, leos eyes were shut tightly while little trickling tears slipped down his scaled cheeks. 

Mikey smiled gently, finally understanding why he had been ignored and kneeling on the ground. "Lelo?" 

Leo whimpered and churred at the nickname, hiding his sticky face in his plushy. 

He wasnt a baby and he didnt need help. 

The orange turtle cooed and put a hand on his brothers head, tilting his own as he observed leos curled up state. He adjusted himself so he was sitting properly, legs spread as he wasnt sure how long he was going to be down there for.

"Hi my moonstar," he said softly, frowning when he got little chirps followed by a hiccup in return. "What's the matter baby?" 

"No' a baby..." the younger mumbled, tiny voice muffled by fabric. 

Mikey pretended he couldnt hear him, hoping it would get him to uncurl himself. "What was that lee bug? I cant understand you when kosha's all in your face." 

Slowly, leo turned his head from where he had pressed it against soft cotton, big teary blue eyes staring up at his brother. "I not'a baby kiki," he insisted, although his voice was small and wobbly. "I... I all fine."

"Are you sure?" Mikey asked dubiously, smiling softly as he opened his arms to offer a hug. "Cause I'm pretty helpful, with even the tiniest problems dude." 

Leo hesitated, but crawled into the orange turtles arms and rested his head against mikeys plastron, a weight on his chest lifting when big strong arms wrapped around him. One hand rested protectively on the back of his head, and the other drew aimless patterns into his shell. 

"Why didn't you tell anyone you were feeling small my star?" he cooed gently, slipping in little nicknames as it always got leos attention. "I know I wasn't here, but you could've told casey, or donnie or raph. You didn't have to hide in the fort." 

Mikey had spent twenty long minutes looking for leo, wondering where he was as all of his things were still in the lair, despite none of the three others having seen him in who even knows how long.

Not that he was mad now, of course not. Just concerned. His eldest brother was such a sweet timid thing when regressed, they had to watch over him in case he needed something because he never felt he could ask for a single thing. So finding out he was hiding...

"I... I try!" Leo insisted with a quiet chirp, not wanting to be in trouble. "Eva'body was busy an'... an'..." 

Mikey nuzzled the crown of the youngers head as a comfort, a silent reminder leo was allowed to take his time and explain however he could. 

"... d'ey didn' listen to me." 

He frowned at the sadness in his brothers tiny voice, finding himself repeating the blue turtles words back to him. "They didn't listen to you?" 

"Uh huh... case p'way wi'v waph and dee who say go 'way..." Oh mikey was going to kill their brothers. "Is that so?" 

"Ya. Case te'ol d'em i's okay bu' d'ey say 'no no no go 'way leo! We hav' case!" leo hiccuped and peeked desperately up at the older. "I no mean ta' be bad-- I be good! ...I jus' neede' d'em..." 

"Oh lee," mikey shook his head dramatically and lifted the younger up closer, sighing. "You didn't do anything wrong, they're just being big dumb meanies to my sweet little baby bug." 

"I not'a baby!" Leo pouted, making the older grin. "Oh really? How old are you then hm?"

"Five!" Leo exclaimed, as if it was a big number. 

"Oh wow," mikey mused. "You're pretty chatty for a five year old, but I guess you are a big boy..."

"Mmhm, I tell you." 

"Soooo... what had my sunshine all stormy in the first place, huh?" He asked gently, wanting some insight into why the smaller had been hiding. "Cause I'm pretty sure we dont hide unless something's wrong." 

Leo whined and stuffed his face between kosha and his brother, sniffling and trying to keep himself from crying even more. Only babies cry. 

Mikey chirped comfortingly, adjusting his hold on the smaller. "I can help lelo, if you tell me what's the matter." 

"...I do'no wha'ta do..." leo murmured eventually. The older just stayed quiet, letting him just take his time. "I... I fe'ol so funny like I gotta move, bu' i do'no wha'ta do so-- so i's like'a big e'spo'sin in muh skin 'n all I t'an do is cry." 

Ohhhhhh... he was having a bad sensory day, that made sense. 

Mikey had assumed, even only after getting the teeny tiny explanation that none of their brothers were giving him the time of day, that lee was a stimulation mess; unsure of what to do with himself because he was little, unable to recognise and try to regulate his stimulation levels. And now it had been confirmed, and it was too big of a problem to not need the help of a caregiver. 

"Aw moonstar, that sounds really overwhelming," mikey sympathised. "I can help with that no problem," he cooed, letting the little snuggle in close as he chirped.

Of course the orange turtle knew leo was supressing the urge to regress, which is why he was being so insistent his was older, why this isnt the first time in the last few days he's slipped, why he was so eager to hide it all. 

But there were always subtle ways mikey could help ease him into younger years, without getting the little all upset and pouty at him.

"Oooohhh you're too cute lee, you know that?" he cooed again, cupping the blue turtles cheeks and beaming at leos small smile, glad his little sniffles and sad eyes had started to disappear. "My little cuddlebug, I could just eat you up!" 

"Ahhhhhh!" Leo squealed as his big brother nommed on his cheeks, tickling him. "No eat! Mika no eat!" 

"Dont eat you?" Mikey huffed dramatically, watching for bright ocean eyes to soften. "Oh why not!" 

"I no food silly!" The younger laughed, putting his hands over the orange turtles mouth gently. "No eat me!"

"But I'm sooooo hungry!" Mikey complained, wrapping leo back up in his arms and leaving loud tickling kisses all over his cheeks. "I wanna eat something sweet!" 

The younger kept squealing, kicking lightly until his brother finally stopped. "I know... what if we bake something yummy?" 

The way leos eyes lit up told mikey it was a good idea. 

"B'ownie...?" He asked timidly, smiling widely when he was squeezed. "Of course! Let's go to the kitchen!" 

Mikey walked with leo hand in hand to the kitchen, babbling about... mikey wasn't even sure what, because he kept switching between english and chirps, chitter chattering away. 

When they reached the kitchen, mikey got all the ingredients out of the fridge and cupboard as leo stood idly by, hugging his stuffy to his plastron and swinging his body back and forth. 

"Okay moonstar," mikey huffed, crossing his arms in mock seriousness. "This is very important what I'm about to ask you, okay?" 

Leos face twisted up in the cutest little serious face the older had ever seen, snout scrunched with his mouth pulled into a little pout as he gave a few chirps. 

"Double chocolate brownies, or triple chocolate?" The orange turtle asked, crouching down as if leo was much shorter than him. 

He resisted the urge to laugh when he was presented with a very childish version of his brothers usual thinking face, grinning when he finally got the answer of "triple!" 

They quickly got to work, mikey trying to let leo help as much as he could without trying to get him to put kosha down. 

Ultimately, after a mental pros and cons list, he decided the potential meltdown over being asked to put the stuffy on the table while they baked would be easier to deal with than the meltdown he was going to get if he got batter on her. 

"Lee, my star?" He got the youngers attention gently, intercepting an almost disastrous egg crack. "Why dont we put kosha on the table over there while we're baking?"

Leo shrunk slightly, putting the egg down and wrapping both his arms around the orca plushy, staring up at his brother with sad eyes and a pouty face. "Bu' kosha... fo' why?" 

Mikey nearly died and gave in to the younger right then and there, but decided to stick by his rule. 

"So she doesn't get any batter on her," he reasoned, smiling comfortingly at the conflicted little. "Of course you can go get her when we're done, but if she gets dirty then she has to go for a super long wash, then a super long dry..."

"Bu' d'en I canno-- canno' hav' her!" The blue turtle gasped, distressed chirps erupting from his chest as he lightly stomped both his feet. "If she go fo' long long time!"

"That's right moonstar," mikey agreed, smile unwavering. "So if we put her over there for just ten minutes while we bake, she'll be all ready for you when we're done, still nice and clean!" Hopefully, if mikey kept his voice kind and upbeat, the little would agree. 

"Does that make sense baby? If not, we can make a pros and cons list on the whiteboard." 

Leo was conflicted, thinking for a few moments before huffing with a pout, walking over to the table and leaving kosha there, before coming back to mikey. "I do it..." 

"And Im so so so proud of you," the orange turtle beamed, hugging the smaller before quickly pulling away, eager to keep him happy. "Okay, lets get to brownie making!" 

Mikey spent twenty messy minutes making sure leo didnt drop copious amounts of eggshell into the batter, burn himself on the bowl of melted butter, inhale flour and give himself an asthma attack, and stir chocolatey batter everywhere.

There are reasons the blue turtle isnt usually allowed in the kitchen, but that was mostly donnies rule because he was sick of fixing the toaster. Mikey didnt mind cleaning up a mess if it meant his brother was having a good time. 

"Okay moonstar, go wash your hands and then you can go get kosha." The orange turtle grinned when leos eyes lit up at the mention of his stuffy, running to the sink and washing his hands eagerly. 

Good, that gave mikey roughly two and a half minutes to wipe everything down, and put the dirty dishes in a pile to be done later while lee washed his hands thoroughly. 

Soon enough he heard the tap turn off and little pattering feet run to the dining room table. 

However they quickly stopped, mikey hearing a distressed chirp and turning around to see leo hadnt made it past the kitchen bench, staring up at their one and only purple banded brother. 

"What are you guys doing?" Donnie asked casually, not having noticed the blue turtles hesitant expression. "Smells good in here."

"Brownies," mikey revealed, walking past leo and reaching for the stuffy before walking back into the main kitchen. "And they're not for you." 

"Rude." 

He scoffed and gave leo his plushy friend, "--here you go moonstar, there's kosha--" sighing and offering a comforting smile when the younger hid behind him. "Stinky donnie doesn't deserve sweets." 

The olders eyes widened as he watched the two interact, realising what was happening. "Is he--"

"Yes," miley hissed, squeezing leos hand when he was reached for. "And you were a big meanie told him to go away earlier." 

Donnie groaned and wiped his hand over his face, guilt tracing his furrowed eyes. "I didnt know he wa--" 

"Mikey are you bakin' brownies again!?" Suddenly raph and casey piled into the kitchen along with donnie, loudly. 

Leo hid further behind his orange brother, expectant eyes hesitantly peeking out at casey, letting out little chirps. 

"None of them are for you!" Mikey announced, frowning. "They're only for me and lelo." 

Leo leaned up and mumbled into his brothers ear, earning a few nods before the older corrected himself. "Actually, casey can have one." 

"Score!" The vigilante cheered over raphs protests, who was hastily being hushed by donnie in a quiet explanation. 

"Hey bluebell," he said, walking over to the younger two.

Leo merely hid further away, only wanting the attention of his most gentle big brother at the moment.

Casey was taken aback by the smallers withdrawn demeanour, looking towards mikey for answers. 

"Me and moonlight were making brownies, because someone told him to go away," mikey explained, sending his two elder brothers a glare. "His stimulation levels are a bit whack and he's too small to figure out what to do about it." 

Casey nodded and smiled when leo peeked out at him again, crouching down. "Hey honeybee, you okay?" 

The younger stared at him for a moment before his face slowly scrunched up into a wobbly pout, tears brimming in his eyes as he hid his face again, sniffling. 

Casey was shocked at such a negative reaction, throwing yet another worried glance up at mikey who just hugged the little close. 

He still needed to clean the kitchen, which he could make the others do - but he also needed to talk to them, which he couldn't do with leo attached to his hip. 

But the younger didnt want anything to do with the other boys, and as his caregiver for the moment, mikey couldn't just leave him alone. In spite of it being wildly rude and irresponsible, it wouldnt even be possible without upsetting the younger more. 

He couldnt call april, as she was busy, and splinter was always out of the question. 

There was actually one time when they asked their father to keep an ear out for the little. The boys had gotten an alert up top for purple dragons activity while leo was regressed and sleeping. 

The boys arent really close with anyone else... practically everybody's friends with the mutanimals besides leo, and...

Holy shit-- he could call karai! Leo loves his eldest sister, big and little alike. 

"Baby bug... hey," he cooed gently, struggling to keep his smile when the blue turtle peeked his head out with teary eyes and a runny nose. "My itty bitty star, why don't I see what ane's doing?" 

Leo sniffled and tilted his head, pout still evident. "M'a?" 

Mikey softened at the muffled nicknames; the only time karai ever accepted being called miwa, or even sometimes she swears she heard mama, was from an especially little baby brother. 

Leo grew up the closest to splinters religious and spiritual beliefs, so he was actually the only one who had any sort of relationship with miwa and teng shen before finding karai.  

The brothers grew to understand it, because it was the reason why the leader was initially so drawn to the heir to the foot. Because he already had a spiritual connection to her without even knowing. 

So, when leo regresses, so does some of his view on karai - or in his mind, his untouchable big sister miwa. 

"Yeah moonstar, miwa," mikey assured, wiping the youngers tears. "You wanna see her?" 

"Ane," he gasped, hugging his stuffy close and swaying slightly. "Ane!" 

"Yup! Let's call her right now, huh?" Mikey cooed, pulling out his T-phone and sending a quick glare at his brothers to stay silent and in place. 

The line rang for a few moments before the girl picked up. "Kokuten? What's up?"

Leo gasped and smiled at the sound of his sisters voice, stomping lightly in place. "Mimi! Mimi! Mi'ma!" 

"Hey karai," mikey said gently, holding the phone out infront of both him and leo while it sat on speaker phone. "Me and lee were wondering if you could come down to visit?" 

"Oneechan!" Leo chirped, earning a soft chuckle over the phone. "Hi gekkō. Yeah, I have a meeting a bit later but I'll come visit for a bit. I'll be down there soon." 

Once they hung up, they heard a muffled curse from casey. 

"Yo, I've gotta dip and get angel from soccer, dad's stuck at work," he explained apologetically to everyone, before turning specifically to mikey and leo. "Do yous mind if I come back later though? I miss my baby blue," he offered gently. 

Mikey clicked and rubbed leos shell, shrugging. "That's up to lelo." 

Casey sighed and crouched down, smiling softly when the little peeked his head out. "Can I honeybee?" 

Leo stared for a few moments, but eventually nodded his head, accepting a gentle kiss on his snout. 

"Thank you baby, I love you," he said gently, standing up. 

"W'ov' y'u," the blue turtle mumbled before casey left.

Now mikey just had to wait for karai.

Karai was true to her word, as always, meeting them in the kitchen in record time. "Hi boys." 

"Hi aneki..."

"Mi'a!" Leo called excitedly, still glued to mikey while his big sister was near the turtles he was avoiding. 

"Akachan!" Karai cooed, walking over to the younger and letting him wrap her in a squishy hug. She didnt hesitate to return the favour, always willing to go to the ends of the earth for any of her family. 

Especially leo, who was noticeably the favourite baby brother. 

"How are you little one?" Karai asked gently, soft smile conveying limitless love. 

Her expression changed a bit when the smaller churred and peeked out at his brothers subtly, before hiding his face again quickly. 

She glanced up at mikey, turning her attention to him instead. "What's the matter?" 

"Raph and donnie were being jerks again, I'll explain later," was all the orange turtle offered. "You think you and lelo could go colour or something? He's been having trouble with his stimulation levels." 

Karai softened, gently caressing her baby brothers head. "Of course we can. Do you want to go colour otouto?" 

"Why dont you show her your fort moonlight?" Mikey suggested, which finally seemed to peak leos interest. 

He took a deep breath, wiped his sniffling nose on his arm with kosha hugged tightly to his chest. The other arm interwined with karais bicept and lead her out of the kitchen quickly, leo avoiding eye-contact the entire time. 

With the little well out of earshot, mikey glared at his two elder brothers and began the conversation they knew was coming. "You assholes." 

"Oh piss off mikey," raph retorted, rolling his eyes and huffing, not making eye contact either. "We didn't know he was kid leo." 

"Not an excuse!" The youngest hissed, getting significantly more angry the more he heard excuses, despite knowing his brothers felt guilty. "Yous ignored him, how dare you." 

"Michael," donnie started gently, eyes creasing. "As much as we're sorry, don't you think this is slightly dramatic?" 

His voice was hesitant as he spoke, already having an inkling the orange turtle definetly wouldnt accept his point of view. "Leo's okay now, and we wouldn't have treated him that way if we knew he needed help with something."

"And what would've happened if I stayed with mondo tonight huh?" Mikey retorts angrily, fists balled at his side. "I found him crying and hiding in the fort you guys made a few days ago, upset because he needed you guys and you didn't even hear him out! Would you have even found him?" 

"I mean, who does that to their own brother?" He exclaimed, irritation not dying down anytime soon and feeling overly protective of the blue turtle. "You didn't even spare a glance at him, he probably would've had kosha which is always peak indication for little leo. And we all know he's been extra stressed lately cause we dunno what's goin' on with shredder. It builds up inside him until he explodes." 

"We get it," raph grumbled, accepting there was no point in arguing. "We're sorry, a'ight? Shouldn't have ignored him." 

Donnie nodded in agreement, to which mikey just sighed. 

"You know he can't stand being ignored when he's regular leo, let alone little leo," he reasoned, just shaking his head. "You guys know it's hard for him to ask for help, that he doesn't bother anyone unless it's important. He needed his brothers, and you--" He took a deep breath, cutting himself off and walking towards the exit of the kitchen. 

"I can't even deal with you two. Clean the kitchen and watch the brownies, they should have about ten minutes left on them. Burn them, and I burn you." 

The minute mikey left both boys let out a breath they didnt realise they were holding. 

"He's so sensitive," raph grumbled, aggressively stacking dirty dishes and finding the soap from under the sink. 

"He's not wrong though," donnie shrugged, sighing as he started to sweep flour off the floor. "Leo wouldn't go anywhere near me when I walked in, not even to get his toy from the table." 

Raph groaned, shaking his head. "Fucks sake. I wouldn't have told him to piss off if I knew he was regressed donnie," he hissed. "I can't have the kid thinkin' I hate him. He takes that shit with him when he's normal again, and then back next time he's small. Pain in the ass." 

Donnie knew raph was just worried the blue turtle would think they didnt want him around, didnt love him. 

"I know," the taller sympathised. "Let him calm down and we'll talk to him when he lets casey close again." 

"Alright." 

- with leo and karai - 

"Come on little one, show me this amazing fort kokuten was talking about." Karai didn't mind the gentle pulling on her arm as she was guided through the lair and into the pit. 

She was stopped, watching as leo silently pointed towards a surprisingly well made blanket fort, supported by three of the dining room chairs with blankets draped over them. They created a little doorway like a tent at the opening, inside being filled with more fluffy blankets, pillows, and a couple extra stuffies. There was also a pale yellow paper star garland strung across the top of the inside, matching the stars all over the blankets they had chosen. 

"It's beautiful lee," karai said gently, smile plastered on her face when she got the cutest squishy grin in return. 

She was lead to the inside, the makeshift doors being draped shut as they sat down, hidden from the outside world. 

Leo crawled into karais lap immediatly, snuggling into her chest and purring quietly when she hugged him close; one arm wrapped around his shell, the other around his shoulders with her hand holding the back of his head protectively. 

"Are you okay otouto?" The girl hummed gently, voice like honey in the youngers tympana. But all she got was a weak chirp in return. "Akachan..." 

Little leo brought out a motherly instinct in karai that she didnt know she had. 

It wasn't exactly a bad feeling, it just stressed her out from time to time. Her brother wasn't exactly the best at keeping himself safe as opposed to everyone else. 

"Come on gekkō, you can tell me what's wrong," karai promised, leaving a light kiss on the crown of the youngers head. "We always tell eachother everything." 

Little clicks errupted from leos throat as he nuzzled the fabric of the olders clothing. "Mi'chan..."

"Yes little one, I'm here," karai assured softly, carressing the blue turtles shell. 

"M-- M' I... I..." he struggled to string together words, humming frustratedly and beginning to fuss, getting upset. "I's... d'ey... m'ia..."

"Take your time akachan... watashi no chīsana gekkō." 

Leo hiccuped, beginning to sob quietly, just like before karai even arrived. "D-- d-- M' all-- D'ey don' w-- w--" he huffed and stuttered though his sentences. "Ha'e, mi'a. H-- ha'e ha'e ha'e."  

"Hate?" His older sister asked gently, being stuck on that word in particular. "What hate lee." She hadn't the slightest clue what he was talking about, or why he had so suddenly gotten upset again.

"Me!" he garbled, now biting down on the side of his hand, hard. "D'e' ha'e me!" 

Karai could only assume leo was thinking of donnie and raph, just sighing and pulling the younger closer into her lap so she could rock him gently. 

"No they dont otouto," she assured, voice hopefully soothing. "Do you want a chewy? You can't bite your hands little one." 

"Mmmmmmmm!" Leo hummed aggressively, almost growling which karai tched at. "Don't be fussy with me mister, I'll call kokuten to bring a chewy, huh? Maybe your nummy?" 

Leo didnt respond, chomping harshly on his scales as he remained curled up in karais embrace. 

The girl didnt waste a single second reaching for her phone, typing a message out to mikey with one hand so she didnt upset the younger further. They hadn't even had the chance to colour in yet.

Were they supposed to let leo be a brat and always get what he wants when he's regressed? No, the little is still supposed to have discipline. However he was almost always well-behaved and didn't really need it. 

She thought it was unnecessary, especially when he was so upset already. 

Mikey replied almost immediately, and within the next couple minutes was gently pulling apart the blankets and sitting in the makeshift doorway. "Hey guys." 

"Akachan," karai cooed, patting the blue turtles shell lightly. "Kokuten's here, would you stop biting your hand now?"

Leo turned his head to look at his older brother, hand still tightly pressed between his fangs.

Mikey offered a comforting smile and held out a blue sensory chew in the shape of a triangle, a silicone band connected to it so it was easy to hold. 

"Here lee bug," he sad softly, holding it close to the younger. "Would you like this instead of hurting yourself sweetie? I see you're still all sensory messy huh." 

Leo sniffled and slowly sat up out of karais arms, crawling and closing the gap between him and the orange turtle. 

He was welcomed with open arms, mikey gently taking the youngers hand that was in his mouth and replacing it with the stim toy. "Here, you take this one while i look at your hand." 

The orange turtle pulled wetwipes from somewhere, cleaning the blue turtles hand and massaging it gently to help the nasty red irritation go down. He was thankful leo hadn't drawn blood, just creating a light bruise that would disappear in a few days. 

While one of mikeys hands focused on leos, the other was lightly scratching his carapace to keep some sort gentle physical stimuli, redirecting his crave for pain.

They sat like that for a while, mikey and karai talking softly as leo laid silent, eyes staring off at nothing while he chewed and chewed and chewed. 

Eventually the chewing slowed down though, to the point they could no longer hear the quiet squeak of silicone. When the older two looked down, they saw leos eyes fluttering heavily, still nibbling on the toy. 

"Moonstar," mikey called, voice just above a whisper and tickling leos sleepy brain. 

He continued after a few moments of no response. "Here, you keep kosha all wrapped up tight," he guided, gently taking the sensory chew and adjusting his orca stuffy in his arms. "Ill take the stary chew... and you can have your nummy, hm?" 

Leo opened his mouth ever so slightly so the white pacifier could be placed between his lips, sucking on it immediatly. He snuggled closer into his big brother with his plushy, ocean eyes reflecting warmth with a glassy softness to them as they drooped open and shut. 

Well, he definetly wasnt a 'big boy' right now. 

"Sleepy gekkō," karai cooed lightly, smiling at her baby brother. "Must be nap time." 

Mikey huffed lightly and held leo close, looking down at the younger with a fond expression as his eyes finally drifted shut and didnt reopen. "Looks like it." 

"So, why was he avoiding aka and nasu?" Karai asked quietly, watching her baby brothers closely. "What have they done now." 

Mikey sighed and shook his head lightly, softy carressing the blue turtles head. 

"He slipped and went looking for them while I wasn't home, because his stimulation levels are all over the place and he didn't know what to do," he explained, voice just above a quiet whisper. "But they were hanging out with casey and ignored him because they didnt realise he was small." 

Karai hummed in understanding. "They wanted casey to themselves for the day." 

Mikey nodded his head, frowning. "Maybe it was a little unfair to yell at them, casey's always with leo because they're dating, and they're bestfriends... but they shouldn't ignore leo. If they feel ignored, then that's caseys fault, not leos." 

His voice was insistent, but hesitant eyes still searched his big sisters face for approval. "...Right?" 

"They shouldn't ignore either of you, you're right," karai agreed, smiling when mikey huffed. "I never said anything about me..." 

"No, but you're very protective of leo, especially when regressed," she said, expression softening. "You know aka and nasu can be mean. You like being the one who is here with him." 

The orange turtle chirped, just watching his brother sleep. "He's always looked after us. Raph and donnie dont appreciate him enough, but I do. I just whine when raph and donnie are mean to me and leo takes care of it, but he doesn't ever defend himself because he's dumb," he argues, easily frustrated anytime he thinks about it. "I dont like that he needs to regress, but when he does I like that its an easy opportunity for me to take care of him and see into his head for a bit." 

"You know," he continued, not realising he was ranting. "You'd think dee wouldn't ignore leo, and to be fair he doesnt do it nearly as much as raph-- but still."

"Me and don have been completely invisible to dad since forever, so he should know how it feels and be able to empathise with leo, but nooooooo," he mocks, rolling his eyes. "He has jealously issues like raph and is a dickhead." 

Karai huffed out a quiet laugh, about to reply when she heard: "We heard that you shit." 

She crawled out of the fort after mikey scooted out, careful to not jostle leo too much. "Kon'nichiwa, otōto-tachi." 

"Stop teaching mikey swears aneki, you'll give leo a heart attack," donnie lectured light-heartedly. 

"Mmhm." 

"Like you care how leo feels," mikey mumbled, scowling up at the elder two. "Jerks." 

"Dont be an ass, we're sorry alright?" Raph retorted, growling when the orange turtle stuck his tongue out childishly. "We didn't mean to." 

"We really are sorry angel," donnie said, voice sincere and soft. 

Suddenly mikey felt his eyes become misty, sniffling and shocking everyone with his suddenly stuffy nose. "Yous always do this." 

Their eyes widened at their youngest brothers wobbly voice, softening when he nuzzled into leo further. "You always say sorry and then you do it again. Yous only think about yourselves. You're always so mean." 

"That's not fair mikey," donnie argued back weakly, but he knew it was futile when the smaller just shook his head. 

He stood up carefully, manoeuvring leo into a comfortable position in his arms before turning to his sister. "You have a meeting right?" he asked, earning an apologetic nod. "Thanks for coming down oneesan." 

"Do you want me to come back when I'm done? Or I can just ask shini to reschedule it." He shook his head, telling her it was okay and letting her leave. 

He didnt even glance at his brothers as he walked away, only offering a quiet "we'll be in my room. You gotta say sorry to lee, not me."

When mikey got to his bedroom he gently set leo down on his bed, making sure he was sound asleep before quickly running from his room to his brothers, finding his weighted blanket, as well as his headphones, and making his way back. 

The younger was curled up when he returned, but the minute his fluffy weighted blanket was draped over him he relaxed significantly, purring as he snuggled into both the warmth from fabric and the softness of kosha.

Mikey sighed fondly and put the headphones on his bedside table for later. Then he went over to his hammock, crawling in and just resting his eyes on his sleeping brother. 

But he hadn't realised how heavy his own mind was, he himself worn out from his big day and succumbing to slumber. 

- A couple hours later - 

Leo chittered as he rubbed his feet under his blanket, socks soft and warm on his permanently cold toes. 

The first thing he noticed when he opened his eyes was a blurry mikey in the distance, sleeping in a cocoon hanging from the ceiling. 

He chirped and sat up out of his blanket, sweater paws rubbing his eyes gently as he yawned. He felt his pacifier fall into his lap as his mouth opened wide, grasping it from his lap and twisting it back in-between his lips when he was done. 

That was when he saw kosha, gasping and snatching the fluffy stuffy from his lap and snuggling it close with a smile and happy chirps.

Looking around the room, leo wasnt too sure what he was searching for, but waking mikey up or getting out of bed hadn't really crossed his hazy mind as of yet.

And it seemed he didnt have to, attention catching onto the orange turtles tablet on his bedside table, reaching for it with excited chitters. 

He loved the tablet, he got to play toca boca world! 

He also noticed his headphones, which thankfully connected to the tablet when he turned them on and placed them over his tympana.

It only took the few minutes for the game to load for him to be immersed in the bright colours and eye-catching decoration of an imaginative setting. He was oblivious to the world around him, but it was okay, he was quiet and content. 

- an undisclosed amount of time later, with leo being his little ipad kid self - 

Casey opened mikeys bedroom door gently, not too sure what to expect of the quietness coming from the space and not wanting to disrupt the boys. 

He grinned as he saw leo nestled in mikeys bed, snuggled in one of his hoodies with his pacifier resting in his mouth. His legs were criss-crossed underneath his grey weighted blanket, kosha settled in his lap whilst he sat content on the tablet. 

Casey huffed fondly, but of course the blue turtle hadn't noticed him while his headphones were on. 

The vigilante walked close and sat on the bed, finally gaining the littles attention. "Hey bluebell--"

Leo suddenly kneeled in the bed, tablet falling gently onto the piles of sheets and blankets as he, with a surprising lack of coordination, pressed his hands gently against caseys mouth. 

The older raised an eyebrow, watching as leo pointed towards the other side of the room. 

His gaze followed the sweater-pawed hand, seeing mikey twisted up in his hammock dead asleep, mouth open as he snored lightly. 

Leo finally moved his hands away, bringing one finger to his lips in a hushing motion, before settling back down in the bed. 

"I getcha, I'll be quiet dont worry," casey assured, smiling when the younger reached for kosha and snuggled into his side. He wrapped his arm around the blue turtle, earning little chirps of approval. "You feelin' better now honeybee?" 

Leo chittered and nodded his head, suddenly looking at the older as if he remembered something. 

Casey raised a playful brow, smile not faltering. "You not mad at me anymore? I'm sorry if I upset you earlier, I always love bein' around my baby, you know that." 

Leo stared for a moment before humming quietly and snuggling into the tallers chest. 

Seems like he wasn't mad anymore. 

Casey chuckled and kissed the crown of the smallers head, squeezing him close. "How about we go watch a movie and let mike sleep, yeah?" 

"Mhmmm." 

The vigilante took that as a yes, manoeuvring around to see if leo was going to need to be carried, or if he could manage wobbling to the pit. 

It seemed the blue turtle couldn't though, as casey recieved grabby hands the minute he was standing and the younger was still sitting in bed. 

He picked his boyfriend up, no questions asked, making sure he had kosha and leaving the room quietly. 

Casey made his way down into the pit with leo in his arms snuggled close into his chest, perfectly content with his boyfriend gently humming the space heroes theme in his ear. 

They sat on the couch, the taller reaching for the remote as the blue turtle got comfortable. Casey didnt bother trying to ask leo if there was anything he wanted to watch in particular, putting on bluey. It was fool proof little leo content, especially when he was in younger years. 

Bluey, space heroes, lego ninjago, we bare bears, winnie the pooh, space heroes, happy feet, my little pony, in the night garden, did casey mention space heroes? 

They were all able to be put on for leo while he was regressed without recieving any complaint from the small turtle. They knew which show to put on based on his mood and age bracket, but utlimately they could never go wrong. 

"Aa'a!" Leo chirped and pointed at the TV, already invested by one of his favourite shows.

"That's right honeybee," casey cooed, kissing the small turtles cheek. "Blue blue! She's just like you, all little and cute." 

Leo just churred and focused on the TV, too young to properly respond to any comversation, only able to listen. 

After many, many, episodes of bluey, donnie appeared in the living room with them. 

"I see someones awake and taken over the TV?" he teased lightly, a hesitant smile on his face when only casey acknowledged him. "Hi blue bug, could I watch TV with you and case?" 

Leo churred and glanced at his brother briefly before turning back to the TV. He chittered quietly, essentially giving donnie permission to sit down as that was the only acknowledgement he recieved. 

Okay, so leo was definetly way too young for donnie to make up with him right now, but it was still progress. 

Raph wont come out until his fellow middle child had successfully earned the smallers forgiveness. He was most likely sulking in his room about making both leo and mikey upset. 

After a few more episodes of bluey accompanied by silence from the youngest and occasional quiet chatter from the elder two, leo fell asleep again. 

Casey had only noticed when he felt the blue turtles pacifier fall onto his arm. He smiled and gently settled between leos parted lips, watching fondly as it bounced up and down a couple times before resting securely in his mouth. 

"He was way too young for you to talk to him bro," the vigilante offered quietly. "But you might wanna still try while he's little 'cause he'll just brush it off when he's big again." 

Donnie sighed softly, eyes taking in every tiny detail of his brother. "I know. It's not a big deal to him when he's older, but he can be so sensitive when he's regressed." 

"Blue's sensitive in general, you know that," casey counters. "He hides it. Every little thing gets to 'im, it just takes a lot for him to show it." 

"Yeah." 

- the next time leo was awake - 

"Leo? What are you doing in here?" Donnie walked into the bathroom, just to check to see if they had any cotton swabs since he had run out of his own, but before he could he found leo. He was in bathtub, sitting down with mikeys tablet. "Why are you in the tub...?" 

It was only early in the morning, around nine, so the scientist wasnt expecting to run into anyone. Especially leo, who he honestly thought would still be sleeping, or atleast training after missing his usual schedule.

Leo just stared up at his brother, pouting as he pointed to the bathtaps. 

Donnies eyes widened, realising the smaller was still regressed. "Ohhh, do you want a bath hun?" 

The youngers eyes lit up, chirping excitedly and nodding his head. He climbed out of the bathub, placing the tablet up onto the basin sink and staring at his brother expectantly. He was still missing his sweet little smile though.

Donnie grinned at his brother, shaking his head lightly and teaching for the taps. 

"Okay okay, I'll run it for you," he mused, getting the water to the right temperature and waiting as the tub filled up slowly. "Why didn't you come ask someone to do it for you? Instead of having to wait," he asked gently. 

"... Didn' wanna bo'va ana'one, t'ause mika is sti'a s'eep..." 

Donnie looked over at his brothers little mumbles, eyes creasing together. "You wouldn't have bothered me nardo." 

Leo just shrugged and pulled one of his hands up to his mouth, nibbling on his finger. He didnt have kosha, which was odd - donnie would have to ask him about it

"Didn' wanna ma'e y'u ma' ah'gain," the little mumbled softly, voice gentle and sad. "I' so'rey..." 

"Oh..." donnies heart sunk. 

He sat on the ledge of the bathtub, keeping a mindful eye on the water level rising as he gestured to the little. "Lee... baby come here." 

Leo sniffled and wobbled over to his older brother, letting arms wrap around him and leaning into the embrace. 

"You don't have anything to apologise for," donnie insisted gently, holding the blue turtle close. "I'm sorry for getting mad, I didn't know you needed help. You can always come to me for anything you need." 

Leo hiccuped and snuggled closer, trembling. "I-- I don' w'ike i' whe' y'u ye'ol a' me."

"I know, I know baby bug and I'm so sorry," the older apologised, pulling the smaller out so he could see his face. "I'll try not to yell again, okay?" 

The little wiped his tears and nodded his head hesitantly, bright glossy eyes scanning his brother for any slight indication of irritation. "O'tay..." 

"Alright, your bath's ready."

Leo calmed down once he had the warmth of water engulfing his body, purring as he played with the towers of bubbles donnie had made for him. 

Of course the scientist couldnt go back to his lab, he had to watch the little atleast until there was another caregiver around, so he just sat off to the side on his T-phone. 

"...Y'u wan'a p'way?" he heard suddenly, looking up to see leo watching expectantly. 

A fond smile spread across donnies lips as he put his phone to the side, nodding his head. "Of course lee, let's play." 

-

Leo wobbled up to his brothers bedroom door, nibbling on his thumb as he raised a sweater-pawed fist to knock on the wood. "Wah'fa?"

The door was half open already, giving raph full view of the younger, seeing he was in his eyeore snuggy and stary bedsocks with kosha still snuggled tight under his arm. 

"Hey kid, what's up?" Raph greeted gently, patting his bed next to him and putting his comic down to give the blue turtle his full attention. "Still a bubba huh?" 

Leo chittered and wobbled into the room, climbing into the bed and sitting with his knees to his chest under his snuggy. He used the softness of his orca stuffy as a soother, gently rubbing it against his cheeks and lips. 

Raph tilted his head, trying to catch leos line of sight peering down at the bedsheets. He offered a smile as he spoke, "you good squirt?"

The little peered his ocean eyes up to meet fierce green, glassy and wide as he stared. "M' so'rey bubby..." he said quietly, voice filled with little wobbles. "I-- I-- I no' mean t'a'be 'noy'in." 

"I jus' nee'da he'op, n' I no' mean'ta boh'va you," he chirped, hiding his face in his snuggy. "M so'rey..."

Raph actually wanted to violently kill himsef in that moment, eyes wide at the unnecessary apology. 

God, mikey was right. He and donnie are cunts. 

"Leo, can ya look at me?" He tried to keep his voice as gentle as he possibly could. "Please kid?"

"Te-- Te'wo say d'at I cou' com' ta'wlk to y'u, t'ause y'u no' mad a' me, y'u nev'a was ma' a' me," leo hiccuped, face still hidden. "He no' mad no more, n' he say so'rey, s-- so I-- I-- I--" 

"Bub, hey," raph cooed, smiling when he finally met his baby brothers eyes. "It's okay dude, I'm not mad at'cha." 

Leo sniffled and wrapped his arms around his brother, snuggling as close as he possibly could without being inside the olders shell. "I... I jus' mi'sh y'u bubby... n' so do's kosha!"

Raph chuckled and rubbed soothing circles into the blue turtles carapace, holding him even when he pulled away to see his face. "Oh does she? I missed her too." 

Leo snuggled kosha into his arms, looking down at her before back up at her brother. He was sitting on the red turtles lap by now, no longer hesitant to be close. 

"Mmhmm." He nodded his head, nibbling on his thumb. "Sch'e mi'sh y'u." 

"Well," raph hummed, adjusting them both so they were more comfortable. "Can I talk to her then?" 

The blue turtle seemed hesitant, but still sat back slightly, turning the orca stuffy so it was facing the red turtle. 

"Hey kosha," raph greeted gently, keeping his eyes on the plush and pretending he didnt notice leo watching closely. "I'm real sorry I was such a big meanie, you're not annoyin' or a bother. I'm just a big bonehead." 

"I mean," he continued as if talking to a real person. "You're only little, like my baby bro over here. Right leo?" he asked, finally looking to the blue turtle for an answer and recieving a nod. "Right, so that means I could never be mad at you." 

"Ne'vor?" Leos soft little voice questions, letting his big brother wrap him back up in a bundle of warmth and love. "Never ever kid. Goes for kosha, you, and mike."

"Mika wa' ve'y up'se' wi'v y'u," he revealed quietly, nuzzling the olders scales. "He say I no' gotta wo'r 'bou' y'u, n' y'u n te'wo mean'a poo." 

"He said we're meanie poos?" Raph questioned with false disbelief, sighing dramatically when he got an insistent nod. "Well, I guess I'll have to check on him huh, make sure he knows I'm not'a meanie poo." 

"Mmhmm, t'ause y'u aw'ways are. Gotta ah-- ah'...po'gise!" 

He actually was taken aback slightly by that statement, curious. "Whadda'ya mean I always am?" He and mikey had spoken numerous times since their little spat.

Leo didnt even notice the undertones in his brothers voice, just beginning to explain what he was asked. "We'ol, y'u aw'ways ye'o'in'. N' ya so does te'wo buh he own'ey sometime, n' say so'rey. Y'u... Y'u don' lis'n aw'l 'da times." 

Of course raph knew he could be a bit of a dick, especially when he's sick of leo bossing him around, or sick of mikey being a little shit... but for a regressed leo to say that? 

"Im listenin' now arent I?" He retorted, brow raised when leo just shrugged. "Gue'sh'oh. Buh' usa'wy no' listen ta'me ev'a. Mika say no' be sa' 'bou' it, buh' I car'n he'op it." 

"I'm sorry I make you sad kid," raph said, voice suddenly very quiet. "I love you ya know. Always will." 

"I 'no," leo hummed, not too worried at the minute. "I's o'tay. W'ov' y'u." 

The older huffed and gave his little brother a squeeze before continuing. "So, you wanna do somethin'?" 

"Hmmmm," the blue turtle pulled a very childish version of his usual thinking face, humming dramatically until he finally came up with an answer. "T'an we ju'sh wa'sh'a movie? I no' f'ink I wanna do nuh'fin." 

Raph reached for his laptop without a second thought, opening up netflix and clicking into the kids profile that was for little leo specifically. 

There was a profile for each turtle, plus kids settings for a regressed leo, and then one for april, casey, and angel. 

It wasn't too expensive when they split the bill up between them. 

"You tired still kiddo?" Raph mused, searching up the lego ninjago movie and pressing play. "You've been takin' extra naps the past couple days," by the past couple days, he meant while hes been regressed. "And we haven't even played heroes once."

The red turtle was actually surprised; leo had regressed for a bit of the day at the beginning of the week, but he's been little for almost three days now. 

It wasn't super concerning, but it was out of their normal. The longest periods leo had been regressed for were probably when he first woke up at the farmhouse, and after the first few days in space. 

Leo just shrugged at the question, chittering quietly. "A li'la bit... when I's big, I don' ass' fo' he'op, so... so I's aw'ways ti'ed." 

"What does big you need help with?" 

He thought for a moment, watching the laptop screen intently as he began speaking. "Chores, n'... n' nigh'mares," he mumbled. 

"An' an'! i's aw'ways makes big me ti'ed trynna ge' ev'a'body ta' listen ta' me," he bumbled out, saying things that came to his mind as he was focused on the laptop. "I's e'sau'stin'."

"We'll have to help big you out more then, huh," raph responded softly, adjusting the volume on the movie for his baby brother. "Like we help you now. How does that sound squirt?" 

"Mmhmm," leo hummed, nodding his head. "Tha's good. I ge' ve'y sad when I' big. No one wanna p'way wi'v me, or-- or-- he'op me like d'ey do when I'sa bubba. Y'u on'y like me when I'sa bubba." 

Raph couldnt say much more than a soft, "we always love ya fearless." 

Chapter Text

"Donatello it's late, you--" 

"Oh I know leo! God!"

The blue turtle didn't so much as flinch at his little brothers yell. His eyes, however, narrowed as his mouth knit into a tight line, whole body turning as he went to vacate the lab without another word. 

Donnie suddenly realised what he had done, softening his tone and quickly calling out before the older could leave. "Wait-- Sorry." 

The leader stopped at the apology, turning around and giving an odd expression. "What?" 

"I'm sorry," donnie repeated, his conversation with a recently regressed leo replaying in his mind. "For yelling at you. It was unnecessary, and rude." 

I-- I don' w'ike i' whe' y'u ye'ol a' me.

...

Why was leo so sensitive to them yelling at him? 

"Oh," the blue turtle breathed out softly, not to sure how to respond. It was... out of the ordinary, but he was thankful. "Thank you... for apologising, I guess."

He just stood there awkwardly, not sure what to say next or where the middle childs sudden urge to apologise even came from. They've gotten better at communicating with leo since everything they had been through with shredder, the farmhouse, and space... but still. 

They're apart of humanity, and trauma is complex.

Donnie decided to break the silence - he had been meaning to talk to leo ever since his regression period last week, but he just hadn't had the chance. "Where's mikey and raph? I cant hear them fighting." 

He knows raph has been meaning to as well, all three younger turtles conversed somewhat civilly about little leo once they finally got him to sleep for a reasonable period of time.

"Asleep, and I think mikey has kind of been avoiding you and raph recently. Hes been... more clingy than usual," leo said gently, tired eyes looking around the dimly lit lab. "Anyways, it's just you awake." 

"And you," donnie pointed out, putting his tools down and giving his brother his full attention. "We both know why I'm awake, why are you still up?" Mikey was a thought for another time, right now he was focused on leo.

The older seemed to hesitate at that question, answering with a gentle "I'm making sure you're going to bed." 

"Leo..." 

He rushed to explain himself, bumbling over his words slightly as he spoke. "I have to make sure you three are asleep, otherwise you wont be up for training tomorrow--" 

"Leo." 

"And if you aren't up for training tomorrow, then I'll be the one who--" 

"Nardo."  

He finally cut off his rambling, green scales blushing a slightly darker colour. "Im sorry." 

"You're not bothering me," donnie insisted, voice gentle and understanding. "You're allowed to tell us things. We like when you tell us things." 

Leo sighed and walked further into the lab, looking down toward the ground. "Im sorry."

"You know, as much as you try to shut us out, sometimes you're really transparent," the scientist revealed light-heartedly, offering a lopsided smile. "Like when we're looking after little you." 

The blue turtle groaned lightly, walking over to a lone office chair near donnies main desk, that was usually claimed by him or mikey, and sitting down. 

"Im missing heaps of time from last week..." he mumbled. "Mikan said roughly four days, right? That I was..." 

His brother hummed in confirmation. "It was a long week. You were regressed on the monday, and then from thursday to sunday." 

Leo just groaned again, making donnie snort. The eldest was so dramatic. "You're blurry about it because you were upset and exhausted the whole time." 

"Im sorry, that must have been bothersome." It was leos first instinct to apologise and take responsibility, which was sickeningly annoying. 

Despite it being out of his control, he would still try so hard to not be such a burden on his family. "Mikey and casey always say that I'm not any trouble, but I know that I can be... sensitive, and overdramatic." 

"Being sensitive isn't a bad thing," donnie was quick to defend his brothers self-criticism. "And you aren't any trouble when youre little. You're actually easier to deal with despite being fussy."

Leo raised a brow, curious, which made the purple turtle clarify. "You're much more honest compared to normal." 

"I just say irrelevant things I dont mean," he quickly said, shaking his head. "Ignore it." 

"So when you cry, for hours, about how raph and I dont listen to you, we're supposed to ignore that?" Donnie question dubiously, a sarcastic undertone that he knew leo might notice, but not specifically recognise. "Well..." 

"Because you're allowed to have feelings leo," he continued, insistent tone bordering on the beginning of a lecture. "We..." 

"You what?" Leo was beginning to get frustrated, clearly not realising he was going to run into a lecture rather than just being mindlessly yelled at. "Donnie this is unessecary, I'm fine." 

But the taller couldn't shake away what he knew, even though his brother was so blurry about what he had admitted, it was still his feelings and they couldn't ignore them. 

You always say sorry and then you do it again. 

Yous only think about yourselves. 

You're always so mean.

Oh... the similarities are clear as day. 

"We aren't going to yell at you like dad does." Leo froze. 

"Not everything is your fault," donnie said gently. "You are allowed to have feelings. I'm sorry we make you feel like you aren't allowed." 

There was a moment of silence, followed by more silence. He just let the eldest sit with his thoughts, knowing that if he kept going he would probably overwhelm the blue turtle and he'd run off. 

He wasn't going to give a lecture about how leo should be more open after everything they've been through, after all the work they've put in to be more honest with eachother especially involving leo.

"... I can't sleep. That's why I'm awake." 

Donnie tried not to show his relief on his face, looking at the older with warm eyes. "Do you know why?" 

Leo took a deep breath, fidgeting with the webs of his fingers as he stared down at the ground with an unreadable expression. "When I'm worried about any of you three. I can't go to bed if I know you should be, and aren't." 

"It's stupid," he said quickly, shaking his head lightly. "Nothing you need to worry about." 

"That makes sense." Donnie didn't bother telling leo to shut up and stop being so dismissive over his literal trauma responses, deciding it was far too late at night for a conversation that wasn't gentle and kind. "I dont think it's stupid." 

He could practically see the thought of you dont? flash in leos expression, no need for the older to verbalise his thought process. 

So he decided to just continue. "You can talk to us about anything, we've noticed you've been a bit on edge lately." 

He went around the word he really wanted to say: struggling. 

"But yous dont..." leo paused, eyes furrowing. "Listen to me in a normal setting." 

"Does it make you feel like we wont listen to the important things, when we dont listen to regular things?" Donnie guided gently, already thinking he knows the answer.

"You don't listen to the important things," leo insisted, meeting his brothers brown eyes. "I dont tell you things to be a bother, I tell you things to keep you safe and healthy." 

The scientist just softened, a small smile gracing his lips. "I mean't the things that are important to you."

"You guys are what's important to me." 

"Leo." 

"I get it," the blue turtle huffed. "I just feel like I have no voice, I'm way too aware of how nobody has ever listened to a word I have to say... and I always end up back in that headspace when..." 

"...When everything gets a bit too much?" Donnie suggested, earning a nod. "Everything is just too much don."

"Can I make a suggestion?" he said, taking his eyes off his brother and packing away what he was working on before he was interrupted. "Go ahead."

"Lets sit down tomorrow and talk about ways we could make everything feel less," he hummed, keeping his voice light so leo didnt feel pressured. "You, mikey, raph, and I. We'll talk, and brainstorm so you don't feel so overwhelmed by everything. And you have my word we will listen." 

Leo didnt respond for a moment, clearly thinking it over in his head before offering a quiet "okay." 

Donnie grinned. "Okay." 

- the next day - 

"Do I have to just start talking..." All four boys were in the pit, sitting across the couch with leo at the center of their attention. 

Mikey was right by his eldest brothers side, watching him intently and barely sparing a glance at the others. Raph and donnie were also sitting next to eachother, eyes on leo. "I still hate talking." 

"We can start lee," mikey offered gently, grinning at his brother when he recieved a nod. "Kay, well I've noticed you've been really tired and quieter lately." 

The leaders eyes were creased while a small frown plagued his lips, but none of the three could really blame him.

"I guess," he murmured, pinching the webs of his fingers. "I dunno." 

"We're not playin' the 'I dunno' game today," raph said, eyes creasing. "Talk to us man." 

Donnie nodded along with the red turtle, warmth dripping from them both. "We're right here."

Leo took a deep breath and just nodded his head simply. He seemed to be crawling further and further in on himself the more they spoke. "I have been tired." 

"And quiet," mikey chimed in. "You only get really quiet and hidey when something's wrong." 

"Nothing's wrong," the blue turtle insisted, softening his voice when he continued. "I just... I'm just stressed out." 

Raph snorted at the general statement. "Aren't you always." 

"Raphael I will skin you alive," the youngest turtle hissed as donnie punched his brother in the shoulder. 

"Assholes, what I mean't is that yeah, we know you're stressed," raph explained, more gently this time. "So we wanna know what's makin' it worse right now." 

The orange turtle glared as donnie nodded his head once again. 

"That's better," the taller said, turning the conversation back to leo. "You said last night that everything was feeling too much, and it was putting you back into a bad headspace." 

Leo nodded in confirmation, avoiding eye contact as he just looked down at the pillow in his lap. "Mmhm." 

"What kinda headspace we talkin'?" Raph questioned, making sure to keep the accusatory tone out of his voice. "Do we need to tell dad to lay off trainin'?"

It worried them when the leader didnt even shake his head, sitting in silence for just a moment before coming up with an answer to the first question he was asked. 

"You know... how sometimes when everything's too much, you dont feel like you can fix it? It's just overwhelming?" He asked softly, continuing when his brothers expressed their understanding. "Well you know... what my solution to that has been in the past..." 

The younger three kept their faces gentle and attentive, but inside they...

"Have you done something?"

"Jesus donnie. Insensitive much?"  

"No," leo shook his head, swallowing thickly and ignoring mikeys little jab at the middle child. 

The blue turtle hated these conversations, but over the years he's had to learn the hard way that as difficult as it is for him to talk about these things, especially with his brothers, it's important.

"I just think, a lot," he clarified. "When something isn't right I can usually fix it, but when a lot of things aren't right I can't do that because Im overwhelmed, and then it's just more overwhelming." 

"What things aren't right at the moment?" Donnie questioned, watching closely as mikey reached over to squeeze the olders hand. "Maybe we can help with them, so there aren't heaps of things." 

Leo thought for a moment, a small frown that could be described as a pout on his face. It was a developed version of his thinking face when he was a child. 

"You guys are really messy," he began, utterly serious. "Like small children. You put nothing back where you found it, leave empty food rubbish everywhere, and refuse to wipe anything." 

"Are you seriously lecturing us about chores right now--" 

"It isn't about that," the blue turtle interrupted, pinching his skin more anxiously now, moving to the wide where his scales were bruised. "I put everything where it belongs, and you never listen to me and put it back. It needs to be put back." 

"We'll try to remember to put things back from now on," donnie eased, watching closely as mikey reached over to gently take leos hands in his own. "Is there anything else you want to share with us?" 

The blue turtle just shrugged, still not very open to the conversation. 

Raph cleared his throat loudly, gaining the attention of all three of his brothers. "Can I say somethin'?" 

"You will anyways," mikey murmured, making leos lips quiver downwards just a tad. 

"You're bein' a shit, shut up," the older said, rolling his eyes and continuing. "When you were little, ya said somethin' about nightmares," he revealed, contemplating saying more as he watched for leos reaction.

When his twin only nodded again, he decided to add. "And you said we only like you when you're a kid. Like... we only wanna be around'ya when we have to or somethin'." 

"I know you guys love me," leo quickly bumbled out. But his voice wavered with uncertainty. "I know that." 

"Do you?" Donnie questioned, eyes furrowed. 

Leo didn't respond, couldnt respond. He throat closed tightly, preventing lies from spewing out of his mouth. 

Raph growled. "This doesn't fucking work if you dont talk." 

"It doesn't work if you keep being rude either!" Mikey suddenly hissed, sitting up from his slouched position against the eldest. 

"Will you stop it?! Fuck, you've been on my ass for days now." 

"Because you're being awful like always!"

"Oh my god will you incels shut up?! You're like children!" 

"You're both just--" 

"Stop fighting." The boys went silent, watching as leo gently, but hastily untangled himself from the youngest and stood up. "I can't-- Just stop." 

"Where are you going?" Donnie asked quickly, watching as leo made his way from the pit to the hallway leading to their bedrooms. "Leo?!" 

"Room!" Leo called back, turning back for a split second with furrowed eyes. "Sort out whatever's going on between you, otherwise I don't want to talk. I can't handle it."  

Mikey flinched when they heard a door slam, trembling with overflowing emotions as he glared at his two older brothers, whispering, "I hate you." 

"Mikey--" 

"I hate you!" He cried out, scowling as he stood from the couch and pointed down at them. "You're awful." 

Neither of the two said anything as mikey stormed off, sitting in silence. 

What the fuck. 

-

"Hey dad?" Mikey peered into splinters bedroom, most of his body hidden behind the door as he watched his father closely. "Can I talk to you?" 

Splinter looked up immediatly, nodding at his youngest boy with a small smile. "Of course, is something wrong my son?" 

"I'm fine, it's about leo," mikey said quietly, sitting infront of his father, eyes gazing over tang shens shrine. "I was just wondering if maybe you could excuse training for a bit?" 

"Why?" The older questioned immediatly, brow raised. "Has he been hurt during an outing?" 

"No," the orange turtle shook his head. "He just... I don't think he's doing very well at the moment, and I know he wont ask for a break himself." 

"You are worried?" Splinter questioned gently, humming when mikey just nodded his head. "I suppose it would be alright if you four had a small break... do I need to speak with your brothers about this?" 

"Please don't," the younger asked immediatly. "I'll talk with leo, and the guys have no reason they can't go to training. I just..." 

He paused, thinking of what he could say that wouldn't backfire on leo later. "I don't want leo to feel like I went behind his back. You know how much he likes training." 

That was a lie. Leo used to love training, but being forced into physical exercise for hours because you're deemed inadequate, does anybody like that?

"Alright." 

- 

Mikey gave leo a couple of hours of alone time, to calm down and think, before bothering him again. 

He knocked on his brothers bedroom door, waiting a few moments before calling out quietly and opening the door. "Leo?" 

There still wasn't a response, or any kind of movement in the room, so mikey walked in, letting the door slip shut with a barely audible click. "Are you..." 

Finally, his brother caught his eye; he was under his blankets, curled loosely around his weighted owl stuffy, eyes resting shut and body limp. 

Leo was sleeping. At four in the afternoon. 

Yeah... he's totally fine. 

Mikey huffed quietly and walked over to the blue turtles bed, sitting on the ground. He reached for his own phone in his belt, pulling up caseys contact and messaging him immediatly. 

Are you busy tonight? 

It was moments before he recieved an answer, nah why. 

Can you take lee iceskating tonight? I'm kinda worried about him

Sure mike, I'll be there at 9? 

Kay

"Mikan?" The orange turtle raised his head at the sound of a sleepy mumble, sky blue eyes meeting with leos own ocean irises. "What're you doing?" 

"You're sleeping," mikey said, tilting his head sideways. "You're not fine." 

Leo just shook his head, sitting up with a yawn and patting the bed next to him, shuffling over as he hid henry off to the side. "I didn't sleep last night." 

"Cause you were with donnie," mikey confirmed, climbing into the bed next to his brother. "But what about after that? Did you still not sleep? Or what about before, were you just awake the whole time?" 

He knew it might be too much for leos hazy mind to answer at that very moment, but he had to know what was happening in his head. 

"I..." the eldest began, clearly hesitant to be honest, but his moral judgement clashing with his instinct to hide was evident in his expression. "I woke up, checked on you and raph, then found donnie. I couldnt sleep after that." 

"What was it about?" 

"What?" 

"The nightmare that woke you up." Mikey was anything but stupid. He could tell right away that today was either woken up by nightmares leo, or something is making me want to stop existing leo. 

Turns out it's definetly both. 

Leo sighed and picked up his plush, sitting it on his lap comfortably. Mikey buried himself under the pile of blankets, looking up at his brother. "It was just dumb... you guys didn't listen to me, you snuck out, and I find yous..." 

The youngest didn't force the blue turtle to continue, letting out his own sigh and falling against leos side. 

"You should've come snuggled with me," he insisted, nuzzling the elders shoulder. "Not wallowed by yourself." 

"I don't wallow," leo retorted, rolling his eyes. "And if I came to your room every time I couldn't sleep, you'd never sleep." 

"I always come to you when I cant sleep," mikey argued, shrugging. "Why is it any different?" 

The eldest got the point, that in no logical way it was actually different depending on which turtle was seeking comfort. But it just felt wrong. 

"Also, I asked dad if we could skip training for a bit," the youngest revealed, feeling his brother tense up slightly. "I said you weren't well, but you like training too much to ask for a break." 

"You shouldn't have done that." 

"I'm worried about you lelo," he continued, looking up at the blue turtle with the brightest eyes he could manage. "You need a break, everything's overwhelming you. That isn't healthy." 

"I guess," leo mumbled, not sure what elsd to say. "You should talk to donatello, and raphael especially. What's going on between you and them?" 

Mikey shook his head, settling himself further in the bed. "Im just mad at them for being jerks. They dont listen to me or you and im sick of it, they're so mean all the time." 

"Go talk to them," leo urged gently, being met with another refusal. "No thanks, they can come apologise themselves. I wanna nap with you." 

He sighed and settled back into the bed, letting mikey nuzzle their foreheads together. "Whatever you say mikan." 

- 

"Knock knoooooock." Casey opened the door to leos bedroom gently, being met with a sight he didn't expect. "Huh." 

Both the eldest and youngest of the turtles, sleeping soundly snuggled under a pile of blankets which mikey had partially kicked off his body. 

Casey hummed quietly, walking over to the two and crouching down, poking mikeys cheek. "Yo, mike," he whispered, waiting to get some kind of response. 

Eventually the youngest did stir, rubbing his eyes and yawning. "Mm... five more minutes..."

Casey huffed and continued poking mikeys green scales. "I told you I'd be here at nine man." 

"Ugh..." the orange turtle finally opened his eyes, the hazy sky irises finally noticing the vigilante. "Casey..? Oh yeah..." 

The older just hummed and took a seat on the floor, watching as mikey sat up and yawned again. "I forgot-- to set an alarm." 

"Tired?" Casey mused, watching fondly as leo moved with with brother, ending up curled up in his lap. 

"Was just napping with lee," the youngest corrected, looking down at the blue turtle as they both whispered away. "He was tired." 

"Well the cleaners would've left the rink by now," casey explained, climbing up onto the bed. "Am I still takin' him out?" 

Mikey nodded and traced the patterns on leos shell gently, staring down at the older. "He hasn't gotten bad yet thanks to last week," he explained softly. "But he really needs a break before it gets worse." 

"Meds?" 

"I made sure he's been taking them," the younger confirmed. "It was my first thought, even before donnie asked." 

Casey didn't mention that the thought of leo missing his medication shouldn't be one of their first thoughts, because of course it is. They all look out for eachother, and that looks different for each of them.  

He just acknowledged that it was a good sign, and decided it was time to wake leo up. The blue turtle could do with a few hours out of the lair. 

"Bluebell." Casey leaned down so he was closer to leos face, a gentle hand now resting on his scaled head. "Open those gorgeous eyes for me love." 

It took a few moments for the smaller to respond in any way, which the vigilante chose to smile fondly at rather than letting his worry seep into his expression. "Hola mi cielo. Come on, I wanna take you out tonight."

Leo hummed and shifted in his bed, stretching out his legs and finally peeling his eyes open. 

"Hey baby," casey cooed, leaning closer and kissing his boyfriends forehead. "Wakey wakey, you're my skatin' buddy tonight." 

The younger churred and sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning as mikey laid his head on his shoulder. 

"Like... board, or ice?" Leo mumbled, not refusing the idea yet. "Cause I haven't finished painting my new deck yet, so it's missing wheels." 

"Nah, ice. Obviously." 

"Mkay." 

The blue turtle didn't offer much more, which was mildly worrying but not enough to explicitly comment on yet. 

"Still half asleep blue?" Casey mused, watching as leo stared off at nothing in particular. "You're all spacey." 

He shook his head, untangling himself from mikey and pulling off his socks to get ready for skating; the ice always made them wet, which was a much worse sensation than his scales hitting the ground. 

He kept his hoodie on though, stuffing his T-Phone into his pocket and leaving his swords where they usually lay. 

"You're quiet again lee," mikey pointed out, tilting his head. "Gotta talk bro." 

"I don't have to do anything, actually," leo replied simply, standing properly from his bed and stretching out his arms above his shoulders. "I don't want to talk." 

Casey saw the youngest about to protest, injecting himself into the coversation before an argument was started. "Alright, let's get goin', yeah?"

"Mhm." The blue turtle nodded his head and let his boyfriend take his hand, not offering a goodbye as they left the room, only "talk to your brothers."

Mikey rolled his eyes and mimicked the older once he had left, groaning as he stood up and stomped out into the hallway. 

He wasn't gonna go talk to his brothers, they could come to him. They were the assholes. 

They just dont get it. They cant treat their brothers like shit all the time and get away with it! 

Okay yeah, and maybe it definetly wasn't completely about leo, but how dismissive they've always been of mikey himself that was the real issue, but that's not the point. 

And another thing-- 

"Shit-- Raph!" 

"Watch where you're going, moron," raph grumbled, shoving the younger off him. "Not my fault." 

"Oh yeah, because nothing's ever your fault!" Mikey exclaimed sarcastically, mocking his older brother. "Waaahhh waaahhhh I'm raph and I dont do anything wrong but everyone hates me! Im a big attention seeking crybaby!" 

Raph didn't explode like the seething orange turtle expected him to, instead causing the younger to hiss by yanking his mask tails and dragging him to his bedroom. 

The red turtle kicked clothes and broken drumsticks out of the way as he shoved mikey onto the bed, crossing his arms with a scowl. 

"I'm not doin' this anymore. Talk or I'll actually knock you out." 

"You can't just threaten people and be mean everytime you dont get your way," mikey hissed, glaring at his brother. "And Im still mad at you for how you're treating leo." 

"And?" 

The younger huffed and crossed his own arms, averting his gaze as he sat silent for a moment before finally responding with, "and I'm mad about how you're treating me." 

Raph grunted and sat next to his little brother, bumping their shoulders together. "How, idiot." 

"You yell at me and leo so much," he started, snout scrunched as he spoke. "Leo just wants you safe, he's not trying to make you angry, but you never listen. And it gets us in trouble, and then gets him in more trouble, and it makes him think super badly-- but you just refuse to listen." 

Raph was silent for a minute, processing the information. "You're always so mean, raph. You and donnie just dismiss everything we say or yell at us-- and I know it's something you learnt from dad, but that means you know how it feels but you still do it to us." 

"I know mike." It wasn't exactly news to him, but both his brothers getting so upset has made something click in his brain. "I'll work on it." 

Mikey shook his head, swallowing thickly. "That isn't good enough raph. You didn't see how upset he was. You didn't have to calm his crying down." 

"Did you see the bruise on his hand?" He asked quickly, continuing when he recieved a nod in return. "Biting. Ane couldn't get him to stop, and I had to." 

"I get it," raph insisted. "I get it mike. I'm sorry, I'm gonna talk to him," he promised, wrapping his arm around the youngers shoulder and pulling him closer in a side hug. "I just needed to talk to ya' first." 

Mikey accepted the comfort, anger simmering down. "Why me? Leo's the one you made upset." 

"Made you upset too, ya' dork. Dont wan't my baby bro all mopey." Raph didnt do heartfelt conversations, not his forte. But contrary to popular belief, he did know how to listen, and he sure as hell knows how to get his brothers talking. 

Mikey snorted, poking raph in the soft scales between his plastron and carapace. "You've got a shit way of showing it dude." 

"I know. Do you want me to talk'ta donnie about it?"

"Yes please." 

- 

"Come on blue! I know you're not that slow." 

"I never agreed to a race you i--" 

"Yap yap yap!" Caseys one goal by taking leo out tonight was to get him to unwind and relax, in which the easiest way to begin the process was to wind him up. 

It the vigilante was good at anything, it was being an annoying boyfriend.

"I thought you didn't wanna talk!" he laughed, narrowly missing a playful swat to the head as leo passed him, beating him to the rooftop of the skating rink. "And look, you won!" 

"Oh don't even use my words against me casey arnold alejando jones," leo huffed with an unamused expression, hands on his hips as he watched his boyfriend walk towards him. "Dont full name me!" 

He rolled his eyes as casey opened the rooftop access door, mock bowing. "Ladies first." 

Leo shook his head, walking through the door and down the stairs into the dry icyness of the space below them. 

"I always forget how cold it is in here," he hummed, admiring the room as casey turned the lights on, fiddling with something unidentifiable. "Remind me again why you never get in trouble for coming here after hours?" 

"I basically fund this joint," the taller bragged, jogging over to the benches leo was standing by and putting on his skates. "We wouldn't get into nationals every year if it weren't for me. Im their special star player babe."

"You're special alright," leo mocked, grinning at the overdramatised gasp he got in return. "Yo, not cool!"

"Dork," he mumbled, rubbing his hands over his shoulders as he stepped onto the ice. 

He turned around, holding his hand out to casey with a gentle smile. "Come on, you were the one who wanted to skate and now you have me waiting." 

The vigilante grinned and walked onto the ice after finally strapping on his skates properly, taking the blue turtles hand and kissing it softly. "Im right here baby."

Suddenly music started playing through the speakers, quiet and slow. Leo recognised the gentle melody of indie pop immediatly. 

I've got tired eyes, a black sky

Casey glided on the freshly polished ice, no cracks or dents from the public skating sessions in sight, tugging his boyfriend along with him. 

Making its home under my lash line

He pulled the blue turtle close and spun them both slowly, leo laughing as they got faster, looking up to the roof and closing his eyes. 

You keep on crying, babe, I don't mind

This song was apart of leos calm down playlist, where he would paint or sleep, or even meditate to the soft humming of slow songs when he couldn't properly get his mind to shut off.

I'll keep on staring at the clock tryna pass time

The smaller smiled as he opened his eyes to meet caseys hazel irises, his warmly coloured gaze taking him in, and only him - as if the blue turtle was the most soul-catching artwork to exist in their world. 

In my life, it flies by, faster than you could say, "I love you, goodbye"

"You're perfect caj," leo said softly, whispering voice tickling caseys brain in a familar way the older adored. "Perfect."

"It's almost over," you say with a sigh

"Only for you bluebell." 

Will our lives be better when we make it to the other side? 

"You're my god given solace, y'know that?" Leo smiled, stary eyed as he leaned up to kiss his boyfriend, slow and passionate.

I hope we make it to the other side

- a little while later - 

Leo and casey had been skating for what felt like minutes; the concept time was nonexistent when you were with the person you loved. 

It's the only time the blue turtle prayed that life was forever, so that he could spend it with casey eternally. 

He hadn't recieved a lecture, or an overbearing attempt at a heart-to-heart, just patience and warmth. 

"I've missed that smile on your face lately babe," casey offered, skating in circles a few feet away from his boyfriends soft movements. "It's what I look forward to everyday." 

Leo hummed, now in a much better mood to talk. "I haven't been feeling like smiling much lately, but..." 

He paused, thinking back to his failed talks with his brothers recently, realising that there was some progress made, despite the amount still left to be made. "I think I'll be okay." 

Casey smiled at that, humming gently. "I know baby. And you know I'm always here." 

"I know." 

They kept skating, casey showing off the tricks he'd learnt from a few figure skaters he knows from when their skating sessions clash. 

"Oh my god-- Casey!" The vigilante snickered at his boyfriend, quickly gliding away as he watched leo dust icicles off of him after being snowplowed. "That's cold!" 

"Oops," casey shrugged innocently, smirking at the blue turtle. "Did I get ya? Sorry babe." 

"Sorry my ass," Leo grumbled, going to move closer to his boyfriend when his already numb toes suddenly caught on eachother and he tripped. "Woah--" 

Face first into the ice. 

"Ow..." he whined as casey tried, and failed, to stiffle his cackle.

He sat as he rubbed his knees lazily, bright red because he was missing his pads. "My knees..." 

"You good bebe?" the older teased, skating to a stop right infront of the blue turtle. He stretched his arm out to pull leo up, nearly flinching at the temperature of his scales. "Holy fuck-- You're freezing babe." 

Leo hummed and stood with the help of his boyfriend, leaning into the skaters chest. "Mhm, i's ice." 

His voice was muffled in the fabric of the tallers shirt, the two wearing completely different outfits; casey was in basketball shorts, a black T-shirt, and a black beanie with a small, white skull on it, whilst leo was wearing a lone, cool-toned grey hoodie. 

The older wrapped his arms around the blue turtle, only just noticing his sluggish behaviour. "You cold?" 

"Kinda," the smaller mumbled, eyes wandering aimlessly as he leaned heavily on his boyfriend. "M... mhm..." He begun speaking, but ultimately lost his train of thought. He seemed to be floating away. 

Casey thought for a moment, before his eyes widened. "Awh shit," he cursed. "Babe, you're a turtle. You're crap with the cold, and you're already tired and stressed out." 

"Mhm... so?" Casey took his beanie off while the younger murmured absently, pulling it onto his scaled head. "Don't ya like, slip into hibernation or somethin'?" 

"Brumation," leo corrected, unphased as the fabric was accidentally pulled too far down, briefly covering his eyes and forcing them shut, darkness clouding his vision. "Nd tha's not how it works... mutant..." 

Casey knew that brumation was a state of inactivity, sluggishness, that reptiles enter during cold weather or when food is scarce. It's a way for them to conserve energy and survive stressful environment conditions, donnie had told him. They find a safe, warm place to hide and their metabolism slows down.

While he thought it was adorable that the safe, unstressful, warm place was leaning against caseys own body heat, it wasn't ideal while they were in a public space, twenty minutes from either of their homes.

It was different for mutants though, he's pretty sure. They dont brumate for as long and can be brought out of it fairly easily, usually. It's also not a yearly cycle, more like if they just get way too cold. 

Leo's already way too cold all the time, so they usually pick their iceskating dates wisely, and tonight was not one of those nights.

"Sure," casey murmured as he adjusted the beanie, waiting for the youngers ocean eyes to reopen.

They didn't.

"Alright, lets go home." But that was going to prove difficult. Like he said, they weren't noticeably close to home, and his boyfriend was like... basically unconcious. "Blue?" 

Then leo churred, body slumping even more to the point where casey just picked the younger up off the ice and skated off the rink, setting both of them on the benches so he could get his skates off. 

"You're so dumb," he mumbled, sighing woth a soft smile as he watched the younger nuzzle his shoulder. "But so fucking cute." 

He loved leo, sure. But he was not carrying his heavy ass all the way home. 

He pulled out his phone, clicking on raphs contact and dialing his number. 

"Yo." 

"Hey?" the red turtles grumbling voice rang through the call. "Aren't you out with fearless righ' now?"

"Yeah," casey confirmed, absent-mindedly tracing leos scales. "Are ya busy?" 

"Nah, was watchin'a movie with mike but he fell asleep." 

"Can you come pick us up in the tank?" He asked, not bothering to watch his volume while the blue turtle was... being a weird turtle, he guesses. "Blue's kind like... slipped into brumation?" 

"He what?" 

"Cold, tired, stressed," casey listed off casually. "Now colder, but warm and safe with me, ya know? Weird turtle shit. Your mutations fucked ya's up." 

Raph wasn't as familiar with brumation as leo would be. Of course he knew what it was, but their mutation messed with them all in weird ways like body temperature, heights, and brain chemistry. 

It's probably how they all somehow ended up neurodivergent. 

Casey could hear a groan through the phone, the sound of a creaking bed and a door quietly clicking shut. "Yeah yeah I ge'cha. I'll be there soon, you're at the rink right?"

"Yup," he confirmed, soon being hung up on and left to wait. 

He'd go wait on the rooftop where it was warmer, but then he'd have to carry leo past apartment windows down the fire escape. He was going to go through the front door when raph got there, but that wouldn't be for another fifteen minutes with the turtles awful driving habits. 

Wait! He forgot every skating rink always had a room for people to sit while they were eating. Casey never goes in there, but he's sure it'd be loads warmer. 

So that's exactly what he did. 

Casey pulled leo closer, cooing when he chittered sleepily as he scooped him up, standing with one arm under his knees and the other wrapped around his shell. 

The minute he walked into the room he felt the temptature rise, but he knew it wouldnt be enough to get leo to stay awake. 

He sat down on a small lounge near the bar, keeping the blue turtle snuggled on his lap as he rocked them gently. 

"Baby," he cooed softly, leaving light kissses along leos icy scaled cheeks. "You with me here?" 

The younger didn't respond verbally, lightly kneading caseys shirt with his sweater-covered hands. 

He's going to be so annoyed when he wakes up and is missing more time. 

They didnt have to sit for long though, caseyd phone vibrating to tell him raph was out the front.

Picking leo up again, making his way around the rink and shutting off all the lights as he did so, humming to himself as if this was just any other day. 

Man he really wished he could portal or something. 

"Yo," he greeted the red turtle as he stepped into the turtle tank, the heater immediatly blasting warm air in his face. "Thanks for the lift." 

Raph scoffed as he watched his friend set his brother down into one of the backseats, inspecting the closely. "Wasn't gonna make you carry his heavy ass home in the cold. Yous are idiots." 

"I didn't think about it," casey defended half-heartedly, watching as leo curled up in the cushioned seat. "Just wanted to get him outta' the sewers, mikey messaged me." 

Raph grumbled in understanding, starting the car back up and pulling back onto the road as they began their way home. 

"There's a blanket under the seat behind ya, how long's he been like that?" he asked casually, not seeming too phased by the state his brother was in. "Wrap him up, he might wake up soon." 

The viglante reached for the blanket and draped it over his boyfriend, watching as leo curled up further, like a little kitty cat adjusting his bed. 

"Oh... dude I wouldn't count on him bein' back to normal before tomorrow." 

"Why?" the red turtle questioned, eyes furrowed as he turned around to try and spot his brother. "What's goin' on?" 

"Well it looks like he's trynna make a nest," casey admitted, moving out of raphs line of sight so he could see the blue turtle. "But he might open his eyes up cause of the heat?" 

The younger turtle groaned at the information, turning his gaze back to the road before he hit something. "He's such an idiot. It's always him who ends up bru--" 

Raphs complaints were cut off by his T-phone ringing, answering immediatly and putting it on loudspeaker. "Wha'ddya want don?" 

"Do you have the tank? Its missing." 

"Yeah I've got case and leo from the skating rink, on my way home," the older explained, rolling his eyes when he heard his little brother sigh. 

"Thank god. You could've atleast told me you were taking it. I went to look for it, then you, and realised it was just mikey in the lair and he's sleeping." 

"Yeah yeah. Did you need to go somewhere?" 

"No. And why are you picking up leo and casey?" 

"Leo's kinda in our weird brumation state right now," he explained, half expecting donnie to scream. "He's fine, case said he's like... nesting or some shit."

The purple turtle did groan however. "Alright. I'll see you at home." 

- the next day - 

Leo wandered through the lair, humming to himself as he made his way to the kitchen for tea. 

He wasn't expecting raph to be waiting for him at the kitchen table. 

"Are you okay?" the blue turtle asked gently, concered. This was weird behaviour for his twin. "Do you need something?" 

"What? No, do I haf'ta need need something to wanna talk to you?" Raph immediatly defended, eyes furrowed as he clicked. 

Leo didn't respond, holding his breath as he walked over to the kitchen bench, boiling the kettle. 

He wasn't having another argument. 

Raph sighed though, leaning over in his chair. "We've been arguin' a lot lately," he said suddenly, making his brother pause. "We have." 

"And most of it's been my fault," he admitted, fierce eyes not shying away when leo looked at him, humming. "Most of it." 

"Im sorry, alright?" raph said, tone almost pleading. He would never admit it, but leo being upset with him made him want to rip off his scales. "I should be listenin', I shouldn't yell so much. I dont have a reason other than I dont think."

Leo let out a breath as his eyes softened. "You know, if i yell, i yell because you're yelling, because Im scared," he started, voice void of any anger or frustration. "If you yell, its because you dont want to listen to me." 

"I dont wanna listen to anyone 'cause dad's always been a hard ass, it's not that I dont wanna hear your voice fearless," raph insisted. "And it's not that I dont like being around you. You're my twin man, I love you." 

"I know that raphael," leo promised. "I would never question that." 

"When you were little you said I only liked you when you were little you. That no one wants to be around you unless they have to," the red turtle countered, eyes furrowed as he stood from the table. "I need to know that you know." 

"I do kaeru." Leo's voice was always so gentle and sincere, raph couldn't tell a lie from the truth if he tried. All he had was the trust he had put in his twin since the moment they hatched. "I'm just... I'm just a dumb kid when I'm regressed, you know that." 

"Yeah and I need to know that you and dumb kid you know that we love you leo," raph wasn't going to stop until he got an answer he was satisfied with. "We love you." 

"Raph--" 

"We love you," he repeated himself, walking towards leo when he saw his blue eyes become glassy. "I fucking love you." 

He pulled his twin in for a hug, squeezing him tight and letting out a breath when he felt the hug reciprocated, hearing sniffles. "Man, I'll say it as much as I need to before'ya get it through that thick head. Do'ya need me to say it again?" 

"No." Leos muffled voice cut through finally, shaking his head as he pulled away. "I know. It's just too much sometimes raph." 

"What's too much." 

"I can't control anything," he admitted, wiping his cheek and sniffling. "Im expected to keep you three safe, look out for april and casey, make sure karai isnt going on a suicide mission trying to killer the shredder. I have to keep this place clean and in order, and I have to control myself for master splinter--" 

He took a deep, shakey breath, his next words barely a whisper. "I can't do it all raph."

"That's why we're here," the red turtle soothed. "I know it seems like we dont listen, and we dismiss your leader crap all the time. But I promise leo we're here to listen." 

Leo took in another deep breath, less shakey this time as he huffed out a small laugh. "I guess I just needed a reminder." 

"Damn straight." That made the blue turtle snort, lips quirking up.

Leo loves his family more than he could ever prove.