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Let Me Love You

Summary:

Dean Winchester barely survived his mate assaulting him, but now that he's dead it's time to move on. Dean and Jack live with Sam in a small house just trying to maintain peaceful lives. Everything is back to normal: Dean lives around Jack's routine to maintain normalcy until he meets Sam new law partner. Castiel makes Dean feel things that he's scared to experience after the trauma he's suffered. How doesn't know if he's brave enough to open his heart up to another alpha.

Notes:

So, I debated for a long time about posting this chapter in its entirety or breaking it up into flashbacks. I think it's better to get the ugly out of the way instead of constantly revisiting it throughout the fic, which still does occasionally occur later, just not as graphic and lengthy. This chapter is THE RAPE SCENE. If you want to skip it, I recommend skipping down to the little asterisk that separates the scenes. The final scene in this chapter is Dean in the hospital. Or, you can skip to the next chapter, which will take place a year after this scene.

Please mind the tags. I may add more to it as I post. There's no set schedule for posting unfortunately. I work on a whim, whenever inspiration hits. I've actually been working on this fic for months so far, and it was time to start trying to post what I have so far.

Here we go, straight out the gate.

Chapter 1: Prologue

Chapter Text

“Please, no!” Dean pushed up with all of his strength, trying to throw Alastair off of him, but it was useless. He had dislocated his shoulder when he collided with the concrete floor and his other arm was pinned out beside him. Alastair was an immovable force that Dean could not escape.

Dean struggled against him as much as he could when he felt a hand at his jeans, stripping him of the fabric, leaving him exposed from below the waist. He begged and pleaded, but it only made Alastair grin wider.

He felt a fist collide with his jaw and he momentarily lost his vision. Everything went black and when he regained focus, his eyes landed on Jack, who was bawled up about five feet from them. The young boy was curled in on himself, tears streaking his dirt-covered face. Dean tried to assess if the boy was injured, but it was difficult. From what he could tell, Jack seemed unharmed. Dean could smell the fear coming off his child though. It was thick in the air, mixing with Dean’s own fearful scent. The two created a powerful aroma that lit the air on fire, and Alastair was basking in it.

Through tears and blood, Dean reached out to him and shushed his crying, trying to soothe his son. “Jack, everything’s going to be alright. Just close your eyes, buddy.” Dean watched his son place both hands over his eyes, trying to shield himself from the violence taking place.

Alastair wasn’t playing by those rules though. “He’ll watch this, or I’ll kill him.” An agonized sob escaped Dean’s throat. He never wanted Jack to know this kind of hatred and pain, and he certainly never wanted him to witness the abuse that Alastair put him through.

“Please, Alastair. Don’t. You can do whatever you want to me, but please don’t make him watch.” He cried hard and begged through his tears. Alastair forced his legs apart and slid in between, forcing himself inside Dean. He buried himself and smiled down at the omega beneath him. He grabbed Dean’s face hard, applying pressure on his jaw.

“Tell him to watch. Now.”

“Jack,” Dean whispered. He couldn’t bring himself to say anything more. He reached his hand towards the boy. “Jack, take my hand.” It took a few moments, but Jack’s tiny hand finally connected with Dean’s, and he squeezed it tight, trying to give the boy some reassurance even though he reeked of fear and agony.

“It’s gonna be okay, buddy,” Dean lied. He knew it wouldn’t be, but he had to try to be brave for Jack, who was sobbing at this point.

Dean cried out when he felt a sharp pain in his side. He glanced to see the silver tip of a blade retreating from him.

“You always knew when to be good,” Alastair taunted. “Always the obedient bitch.” He drove into him, feeling Dean shake beneath him, a painful scream sounding every time he stuck Dean in a new place with the blade. He alternated between the blade and his erection, each taking its turn penetrating Dean. He felt the blood pooling around him as his body began to lose its warmth.

“I want him to know that this is all you’re good for, pet.” Dean felt the knot swell, catching on his rim. “Your only purpose is taking my knot.”

“No!” Dean sobbed as he felt the two of them lock together. Fury invaded him and gave him enough strength to lift his head and spit in Alastair’s face. The alpha’s expression was blank for a moment until the act registered on his face. He forced the blade into Dean’s good should and pinned him to the floor. Dean screamed and felt his grip on Jack’s hand tighten. He slowly turned his head and saw the knife in his shoulder and beyond it, Jack. He focused on the boy and let his scent guide him. When he looked directly at Dean, he knew the boy would understand him.

“Run,” Dean croaked, letting go of his hand. The boy took off and Alastair glared down at Dean.

“You bitch,” he spat.

The backhand that landed on his cheek was strong enough for Dean to almost lose complete consciousness. Alastair wailed on Dean until his knot went down enough for him to slip out. He stood above Dean, letting his gaze flicker over his broken body, crumpled on the floor of the warehouse. As he tucked himself away, he nudged Dean with his boot, eliciting groans from the omega. He knelt down just enough to grip the knife in Dean’s shoulder, yanking it out of the muscle that it had been lodged into.

Dean cried out, a gurgling noise that indicated blood pooling in his mouth. He tried to curl into himself, but he didn’t have much left. He only hoped that Jack had been able to hide where Alastair wouldn’t find him. Dean knew he was going to die on that concrete floor, his body weak and broken, blood surrounding him. He would be alone and in pain, but at least it would be the end of the abuse. At least he could finally rest.

~

When Dean woke up, he was in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of his arm. His shoulders hurt like hell, and he could barely move his legs. He blinked against the dim lights that were next to the bed and tried to focus on his surroundings.

His eyes landed on a figure slumped in a chair at the end of the bed. It took him a moment to recognize the long hair flowing around his face.

Sam.

And tucked into his side, Jack was nestled against him, hiding himself away from the outside world. Dean felt tears of relief surfacing and tried to wipe them away. His pup was safe. He had evaded Alastair’s wrath, but he had witnessed so much more cruelty.

He had been forced to watch Alastair rape Dean. He had smelled the fear, anguish, and loathing that had been coming off Dean the entire time. He had listened to his screams and felt his hand bruising his small one when the knife cut into him. Over and over. Jack had seen it all and here he was clinging to Sam’s side like a lifeline.

But all Dean could focus on was that Jack was safe.

He tried to sit up, but his body deemed it unreasonable. He shifted to try to lay on the opposite side and that only caused stabbing pain, which he hissed at. He finally gave up and just settled back against the pillows when he noticed Sam stirring.

“Dean?” The younger Winchester began to shift to get up, but Dean stopped him.

“I’m alright. Don’t wake Jack.”

“Do you need anything? Are you in pain?”

Dean assessed himself. Of course he was in pain, but it was tolerable. He assumed it was because of the drugs he received at the hospital.

“I’m good. How long have I been here?”

“A week.”

“What about Jack? Is he okay?”

“Yeah. He didn’t have any physical injuries.”

“Sammy, how did you find us?”

Sam wrapped his arm around the sleeping child. “Jack.”

Dean’s eyes widened. “How?”

“I heard him howling.”

“He howled?” Dean had been inches from death and his son had howled for the first time, trying to alert someone to help them. Jack had saved them both.

“And Alastair?”

“He’s dead, Dean. Jack identified him to the police. When they went to arrest him, he pulled a knife on them, and they shot him. He’s gone.”

Dean finally broke. He brought his hands up to his face and cried into his palms. Sam sat quietly, letting his brother have a moment to take everything in. It was overwhelming. Here he lay broken, but he knew he would have the chance to heal because Alastair was dead. He survived and won. It wasn’t for nothing.

“Daddy,” a tiny voice broke the silence. Dean looked up to see Jack wiping sleep from his eyes and peering at him from under Sam’s protective hold.

“Hey, buddy,” Dean whispered, smiling through his tears. Dean held out his arm gently, wanting to hold Jack against him. Sam brought the boy to Dean and helped him ease into Dean’s embrace so that he didn’t hurt him.

Jack nuzzled against Dean’s neck and breathed in a comforting scent. Dean may have been in pain from his injuries, but he was so happy to have Jack there with him. His love for the pup was immense and he never wanted Jack to know anything different. He held him close and took comfort in having him right there.

“I love you, Jack.” Dean kissed the top of his head and felt the pup melt into his embrace.

“Love you too, Daddy.”