Chapter Text
Help.
What the fuck.
Where the fuck.
AM I?!
The last thing you remembered was a truck smashing into you and your best friend as its blinding headlights forced you to swerve on the road. But…memories of your favorite game, Honkai: Star Rail, crawled into your mind.
‘ why am I remembering all this?’ you snorted as you gazed at the blinding lights of… DEWLIGHT PAVILION?!
‘omg what is this joke???’ you stood, jaw-dropping at the sight of billboards and the Clockie statue gazing down at you as if the Watchmaker himself was watching your every move.
“Hey…Are you…okay?” a gentle and calm voice drew your gaze as you stared straight into the golden eyes of the professor himself.
Welt Yang.
“WHAT THE FUCK! Oh Lord, hell no. I will not be fighting stupid Sunday’s stupid orchestra and stupid Aventurine again for the 60th time! Do you know how much work I put into that!” Your screams and cries drew multiple gazes, but once they heard your dialogue they assumed you had either lost your mind or were just yelling about a video game.
Jokes on them…It was both.
As you slowly stepped back and pinched your poor flushed skin for the 10th time, three other voices distracted you, much like those bright headlights (how exactly did you black out because of LED’s?) and you fell straight onto a silver-haired man.
‘ Wait-’ “Caelus?” You questioned, tilted head deep in thought.
As Welt and Himeko nearly had a heart attack, Caelus only sat in fright. But then he remembered that Stellaron Hunters all knew him, and you must be one of them. You had to be.
Or else this was insanely awkward and even creepier than it had to be.
“Are you a Stellaron Hunter?” Caelus asked, hoping and dreaming that you were.
‘ Uh oh.’ You thought.
“Um. I’m-” You were going to lie to him, the poor lad, but you somehow noticed an IPC tag on your coat.
“I’m part of the IPC!” You grinned, relief coating your tone as you hoped they would forget all about your rant about the Penacony Trailblaze Missions.
You could cut the tension with a knife.
“Okay, but…” Himeko paused.
“What do you have against the Head of the Oak Family and…Aventurine? Isn’t that guy your boss?” There seemed to be a lot of halts in their small statements, as if they didn’t quite believe her.
Which was fair, of course. You hadn’t been the most consistent person when it came to your lies.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about…” You awkwardly laughed, manifesting the end of their, basically, interrogation.
March 7th tilted her head, her pale-pink, shoulder-length, hair falling to the side. “Uh, you were talking about how you fought Sunday’s… orchestra? and Aventurine, and called them stu-”
“Hehe, no! I would never do that, I love all my bosses! And it’s not like I’ve met the Head of the Oak Family! Though I am a big fan of his sister!” You interrupted, hoping no real IPC or any Bloodhound member heard what March started to repeat.
“Sure.” Caelus skeptically nodded his head, his mussed-up silver hair covering his face after you bumped into him rather suddenly.
You slowly nodded as well, pacing back down the stairs when three IPC guards cornered you.
“It’s them! Mx.[name]! We’ve finally found them again!” They yelled into the microphone attached to their coats similar to yours.
‘ Oh my God, of course I stole a jacket from an IPC member. Wow, I do not have a good rep with anyone here!’ You tried to speed away, back towards the Astral Express team one would assume, but clearly the guards were faster than you.
And as they dragged you back eagerly, a brush of their words flew towards you.
“Lady Jade and the Stonehearts will be very excited to see you again! We’ve been looking for you for over a year!”
(Unlike your best friend, [name], you didn’t escape their clutches, now did you? At least you’ve made the IPC happy. Let’s mourn for The Fatui as their plans fall through.)