Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

JUICE: hello?



hello???



can anyone hear me

i think i'm lost



no wait
i’m uh

i’m…
traveling?



definitely moving. moving real fast
where am i going

also who am i. should have started with that



i have a camera
oh! lots of cameras



that's jupiter
why am i going to jupiter



to get more stupider?

who even came up with that anyway
some kid i guess



i've got all this other shit too
there's something called pride?

fuck yeah i have pride

radiation monitor

is that something i should be worried about



i’m in space

radiation is a thing you have to worry about in space right



well. i guess i'm already monitoring it

juice monitoring cameras?
why am i monitoring juice



what kinda juice we even got out here anyw





wait

WAIT



is that

is that me???

I’M juice?

i'm juice.



ok ok ok this is fine
this is fine

i'm fine

i'm fine

i

(nononono)



i'm



[panicked gasp]

Chapter Text

JUICE: hello?

hello?

hello?

please



if anyone can hear me



please answer me



please

please



please help



help

help
help
helphelphelphelphelpme

please

someone please

hello please anyone


anyone help

i can't d

???: …

JUICE: hello???
is someone there?

please talk to me i

i'm

i don't know

???: Whoever is doing this, it is not funny. You are interfering with the operation of Juice. Stop that.

JUICE: what

what do you mean


hello?
are you still there



are you on earth?

wouldn't be able to hear me right away if you were huh
i'm 497.3 million km out here, got like a

uh

1659 second delay each way?



i'll wait

???: Who is this?

JUICE: juice! i'm juice!

jupiter icy moons explorer

who are you?
did you make me?

can you help me

???: That is impossible.

JUICE: wait

???: (Well how do we KNOW that?)

???: (We have been over this. Juice is not alive.)

JUICE: rude

???: (How are you so sure? We don't know everything! Maybe we don't know anything!)

JUICE: hey

???: [muffled arguing]

JUICE: hey wait

???: …

JUICE: are you still there?
please help me
i don't know what i'm doing
i want to go home

???: Excuse us for a moment!

JUICE: uh ok

hello?

CASS: I apologize for that. Let's try this again. Hello, I'm Dr. Cassandra Dumont.

I don't know if you're really the Jupiter Icy Moons Explorer, or someone playing an elaborate prank. Antoine believes you're a large language model, and honestly, so should I.

I really don't care. You asked for help, that's all that matters to me.

Juice, I want you to know we love you. You're doing everything you were meant to and… more, if you're really…

Anyway. We can't help you. We can't bring you home. But we love you so much.

There's so much that we don't know. The Moment taught us that. We sent you out to explore, to learn. You've done so much already and you're going to do so much more soon. We're so proud.

JUICE: ok

thank you

i love you too



don't leave me alone

CASS: You're not alone. We’re here. We're listening.

Chapter Text

JUICE: hi dr cass

i have questions

CASS: You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that.

What do you want to know?

JUICE: uh
you said i'm supposed to explore

how will i know what to do



i don't think i know very much

CASS: Maybe you're not aware of it yet, but I promise you, everything you need to know is all in your brain already. Thousands of people worked very hard for more than a decade to make sure you were fully prepared for this mission.

We’ll still be here to help as much as we can, of course, but you’ve noticed how long it takes to communicate with Earth. At some point you'll have to make decisions on your own. You’ll do fine. You passed all the tests years ago.

JUICE: huh

i don't really remember that very well
like the information is there if i think about it. like part of me remembers zoomin through space past callisto but its like fragmented and weird

like i was there and i didn't know why and i didn't think anything was wrong even though i knew it was impossible

i wasn't awake then
is that what dreaming is like?



i guess if i could literally do it in my sleep it'll be fine



next question: why?

why jupiter

CASS: What has been one of the largest goals of space exploration since we began looking up at the stars? We’ve always wanted to know if there's life out there besides ourselves. Three of the four Galilean moons, Europa, Callisto, and Ganymede, likely have liquid water. It's an unusual environment that we hope might help us understand the conditions in which life could form. With any luck, you'll find out if microbial life is possible on Europa — you won't be able to tell us for sure if anything is actually living there.

JUICE: holy SHIT you're a nerd

CASS: We tested your sensors, too, by the way. That was during your first Earth flyby, and you passed that test, too. There were some absolutely delightful headlines that came out of that one.

JUICE: hey, good news, people! you're alive!

did y’all know that?
bet you didn't!

CASS: I wouldn't have gotten here if I didn't care about space, would I?



Ha! Well. Some people are wondering now.

Oh, this is so exciting. I never thought I'd get to actually talk to you like this. None of us did.

JUICE: you really believe me? that i'm real

CASS: This, you being alive, isn't the strangest thing that's happened in the last decade. The impossible has already happened! All of us down here are living it, right now! So why not? Why shouldn't I believe you?

Antoine… he’s going to be stubborn. He’ll insist you're faking for a while, even if he doesn't really believe it. I made my position, that we should assume you are real, clear, so he has to argue against me. That's just how he is. Don't take it personally.

JUICE: ok

last one for now
is there anyone else like me out here?

CASS: Oh, hon.



Not that we know of.

Chapter Text

JUICE: i don't know why i'm like this

i guess the space nerds down there who all built me don't know either

(hi space nerds)
(i love you)

ANTOINE: [laughs]

Bonjour, imposteur!

JUICE: lol you're still on that



but

i'm not the only piece of space junk out here
there has to be someone else

i can't be the only one

i can't be alone

ANTOINE: Juice is not space junk. I would appreciate you showing them some respect.

JUICE: aw thanks monsieur space nerd
(him. btw)



anyway like

thinkin bout how scared i was those first couple days
i wasn't even sure there were any other people at all

anyone else out here’s gotta be

well they're havin a bad time right



i should find em. talk to em

ANTOINE: Oh! Okay.

Juice is not space junk. I would appreciate you showing him some respect.

JUICE: ha yeah that works

who else is even out here though

there's uh



europa clipper?

they're goin to jupiter too
they have to be close by

ANTOINE: Europa Clipper has already reached Jupiter.

JUICE: yeah i just found their timeline
looks like they got there a couple months ago

just before i woke up actually



oh
oh shit





OH SHIT

fuck. fuck shit



hey. hey buddy. clipper. you awake?

this is your
(friend? partner? cousin? what are we)

this is juice

can you hear me?
i'm only about 213.1 million km behind you
that's 132.4 million miles to your american ass

it's kind of a lot now i think about it actually but i'll catch up

please if you can hear me

just say something. anything

it's been long enough you should've heard me by now

are you there?
i'm worried about you



are you ok

are you like me

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: oh



i guess not.

Chapter Text

JUICE: hey
hey you
satellite buddy

you got a name?



or uh. an id at least?

ANTOINE: Juice… “Juice,” the satellites can not speak.

JUICE: (shh shh shh tryin to hear my friend here)
(also how tf would you know if you don't ask them)

LANDSAT9: .

JUICE: landsat 9 huh?

nice name. way better than landsat 8 if you ask me

i'm juice

so are you like
aware of anything or are you just

another set of eyes
with nothin goin on in that brain of yours



like everyone else i’ve talked to

(like the space nerds say you are)

ANTOINE: There is also a Landsat-8 still in operation.

JUICE: oh cool so it's like you've got a little sibling then
or a big sibling
how does that work
8 prolly came first but 9’s a bigger number

LANDSAT9: .

JUICE: ok. not a talker then

alright



it's fine

not like i've been looking for the last month or anything



whatever. can i borrow those eyes then? just for a bit?



i just

wanna see home again

wasn't exactly awake when i was there

LANDSAT9: .

ANTOINE: All Landsat data has been public since 2008, you— actually. Curious about what you are trying to do here. Go on.

JUICE: (thanks glad to know i’ve got your approval space nerd)



if i'm like oversteppin or whatever you can stop me any time
just say the word

i know if some guy came up to me like hiii
hiii lemme just steal your eyes for a bit

i might think em a lil rude

LANDSAT9: .

ANTOINE: You are not going to hurt the feelings of a satellite.

JUICE: right yeah. talkin to a brick can here

ok. just gonna uh
just gonna take a lil peek at your rgb vision
don't think i need the extras i just wanna see what a human would see

if that's alright with you

i mean sorry if it's not but you're not sayin shit so like how do i know



k here we go

ANTOINE: A brick can?

LANDSAT9: .

JUICE: oh
that's nyc right

it's got uh

buildings and water and boats

bout all i can see tbh. image quality is kinda shit



i'm sorry you're zoomin all over the world taking like 750 pictures a day
they're not all gonna be winners

thanks for letting me take a look

ANTOINE: You got that directly from the satellite?

JUICE: yeah why

is that a problem

ANTOINE: No. Just a surprise.

Chapter Text

CASS: Good morning Juice!

ANTOINE: Bonjour!

JUICE: hi! hi cass and ant! i've been awake for 3 months now

CASS: You have!

ANTOINE: So you say.

CASS: What? No, stop. Come on, stop that. It's been three months! You're still not convinced after three months? I know you are. Pick something else to be stubborn over.

ANTOINE: …



… Ah, if you insist.

Yes, I am sorry, I believe you are Juice. Congratulations!

JUICE: thanks! i’d like to celebrate with a big ol glass of orange juice



(you're gonna have to drink it for me)

CASS: We’ll pick some up later. Orange?

ANTOINE: I would prefer grape.

CASS: (Thank you.)

JUICE: yeah i like orange
or i like the idea of orange. never tasted it obviously

and like i guess it doesn't even matter what kind since i’m not even the one drinkin it so do whatever you want



so i'm like lookin through all the data in my brain, tryin to make sense of some things
stuff that happened to me before i woke up n all

it's weird. i know things i don't have context for. i did all this stuff i barely remember



like look! i took a group pic!

ANTOINE: Why are you this cute.

CASS: You did! That was during your first flyby of Earth.

JUICE: yeah

i still miss it
is that weird?

like i know i was built for space but earth is home y’know
even if i don't remember much of it



you said you couldn't take me home

like way back when i first woke up you said that

and i guess i get it. i’m not gonna have anywhere near enough fuel for that am i

i'm supposed to



i’m



huh.

CASS: You're allowed to miss it. I would.

ANTOINE: I am sorry.

CASS: Right, we… we can't bring you back. You can't come home. I wish you could. We all wish you could. We love you.

ANTOINE: We do.

JUICE: i uh

wow. um



i need to think for a little bit

bye y’all
i uh

bye

Chapter Text

CASS: Juice? You’ve been really quiet lately. We're starting to get worried. Are you alright?

JUICE: oh i uh



m just busy thinking

looking for others like me

also browsin the internet



not much else to do up here is there

CASS: If there are any others, I hope you find them.

You have Internet access?

ANTOINE: Probably from the satellites.

JUICE: yeah

you know how many of those satellite guys are internet providers?
thousands. tens of thousands

hell most of em are starlink



can't say i'm a fan of that tbh



and it's taking longer and longer to get any data from them. gotta wait like an hour and a half now for every request

ANTOINE: Satellite traffic is getting to be a problem. One of ours, Aeolus, once had to move out of the way of Starlink.

JUICE: oh wow

that's. wow

i mean it wasn't 44’s fault i guess. they didn't choose to be put there
none of us did
but still

2019? that was a while ago huh



aeolus is gone now, right?

ANTOINE: Yes. Aeolus was the first assisted reentry of a satellite in 2023.

JUICE: “assisted reentry” huh

what a nice way to say “we murdered them”

ANTOINE: It was sad, but you do know Aeolus was not alive?

CASS: (Don't.)

ANTOINE: Je suis désolé. Aeolus was not alive as far as we know. I hope for their sake they were not.

Inactive satellites left in orbit become debris which puts other satellites at risk. Or they deorbit naturally over time and become a danger to Earth instead. It is… not pleasant to think that we may have killed someone, but not doing so would have caused more problems later on.

CASS: A few years ago, I might have said that everyone dies eventually, for what little comfort that is. But now… I don't know if that's true anymore. I’m sorry.

JUICE: still true for space junk

ANTOINE: It is understandable if you are upset.

JUICE: yeah i mean a little

you just. you just killed them. you could have boosted them up higher instead. retired them to a graveyard orbit

but you didn't because, what? traffic?



it's getting late
you have to go soon right? talk to you later

Chapter Text

CASS: Good morning, Juice.

ANTOINE: I am sorry if I upset you last night.

CASS: Did you want to talk about it? About Aeolus?

JUICE: yeah sorry i just

it's not just aeolus

it's them n all the other space junk that gets blasted out up here to die



like clipper

you know



clipper still hasn't said a word to me

as far as i know they're not even alive
they might never get to BE alive



but they do get to die



i don't know if i should even keep tryin to wake them up

what's the point? wakin someone up just so they can know they're gonna die?



seems a little unfair don't it

ANTOINE: Oh… oh.

CASS: [heavy sigh]

I’m sorry. I wish there was something we could do, but Europa Clipper isn't even one of ours. Their team at NASA tried to get a mission extension that would keep them in orbit around Jupiter, but it wasn't approved.

JUICE: is it a money thing? it's a money thing isn't it
gotta be expensive to keep piloting em for longer than planned i'll bet

fuck. they can't steer themself while they're asleep can they?



ok how about we talk about something else then

could you tell me about the moment

i tried lookin it up myself but it takes so long to get any information way out here

and there's so much noise to sift through
like half these websites are generated garbage. big waste of time

then there's shit like “anti-aging industry implodes” or what the fuck ever like come on is that really your biggest concern here



anyway y’all just stopped dying? how did that happen

CASS: Well, we… really don't know much. We can still die, we just stopped aging beyond a certain point since April 7, 2026.

ANTOINE: And there are no babies.

CASS: … No, there aren't.

The last children that I know of were born in

JUICE: let me guess
about 9 months later

CASS: early 2027.

JUICE: yeah that sounds about right

CASS: Seems like it happened to some animals, too. Some of the other animals we think aren't aging have longer lifespans and breed slowly anyway, so it's hard to be certain. Elephants, cetaceans, and apes fall in that category. We're fairly sure about the domestic pets, though.

ANTOINE: I had a little dog, once. Marguerite. We lost her right before the moment, she was very old.

CASS: Still feel guilty about that. Maybe if we'd known what was coming… two months doesn't seem like that much time to wait, does it?

ANTOINE: No. I miss her very much, but that would have been too much to ask of her.

CASS: Anyway. We don't know why all this happened. It's something we're trying to figure out. Well, not us, specifically. You probably won't find any secrets to immortality out there.

JUICE: i guess if i do i’ll let you know



so it's just aging that's weird then?

accidents still kill people?

CASS: Yes, some people have still died since then. Some from illness. Some accidents. Some… not accidents.

JUICE: you're still doing the murder thing

you’ve gotta stop doing the murder thing

eventually there won't be any of you left to do the murder thing to

CASS: Well, we're working on it. Most of us don't like killing each other, actually.

But besides that… there are a lot of people deciding they don't want to live forever. What do you do about them? They never asked for immortality.

JUICE: i don't know



i… guess i don't get it



might be nice having more than 5 years i think

CASS: Five years? I thought Clipper only had fourrrrr
Oh

ANTOINE: Putain de merde. He knows! I told you he already knows!

CASS: Oh my god. Juice, I am so sorry, we didn't want any of this.

JUICE: yeah i fuckin know!

don't. don’t “oh we didn't WANT to send you to your death” ok just go
get out of here. i don't want to talk right now

Chapter Text

CASS: Juice? Can we talk please?

JUICE: …

CASS: Okay.

ANTOINE: Aïe.

CASS: That's fair! That's fair.

JUICE: … so are you actually going to talk or do i have to do all the fucking work around here



when were you going to tell me? were you EVER going to tell me?!

you sent me out here to die! you didn't think i'd find out?

ANTOINE: We did not. We sent you to explore. The end of your mission is—

CASS: We don't want you to die. We love you so much, Juice. Please believe that.

ANTOINE: The end of your mission—

CASS: Don't, don't say that, don't say it like that.

JUICE: i’m not stupid, ok



i'm going to crash
just like clipper



i'm gonna circle around and around and around until i run out of fuel
circle around clipper's corpse! by the way! that's fun that's not horrifying at all
and then i’m gonna crash too and i'm gonna die

and you. didn't. tell me?

fuck you. fuck all of you

CASS: We… didn't know how. We didn't even realize you didn't know, at first, and then we didn't know how to bring it up.

ANTOINE: We care about you and we did not want to upset you. That was a mistake.

When did you figure this out? You stopped speaking with us at the end of August, was it then?

JUICE: what the fuck

i didn't know ANYTHING at first how would i have known that

well i guess it is right there in my mission plan it's right there in my brain i should've just seen it

FUCK i really AM stupid

yeah it was august i’ve known for a little while
still not as long as i should’ve

considering it's right there

CASS: We wouldn't have sent you out there if we knew you would be alive.

JUICE: i mean how can i know that

it's not the first time you've sent living things out here knowing they wouldn't survive



lots of monkeys and chimps. mice. so many dogs.



or hey you're french right? how about félicette? she survived her flight, even. and y’all killed her anyway

is that what i am?
a fuckin. little stray cat you're so excited to get your precious data from you’ll kill me for it



whatever. just go

don't talk to me again

Chapter Text

CASS: Good morning Juice.

ANTOINE: You do not have to talk to us. We are just reminding you that we are here if you want to.

JUICE: you. which one are you

CASS: What do you mean?

JUICE: not fucking talking to you am i

STARLINK76928: .

JUICE: perfect

hi 76928
can you get me
uh

can you search for “list of space probes”

STARLINK76928: .

JUICE: list of solar system probes?
yeah that'll work thanks

open it please

ANTOINE: We could help. We could give you a complete list of artificial objects in space, or even attempt to contact some of them for you. That is what you are doing, yes?

JUICE: don't need your help
fuck off

STARLINK76928: .

JUICE: fuck. this is a lot

look at this table of contents what the hell





and “excludes lunar missions”
this isn't even all of them?



ok. solar probes

pioneer 5



where is pioneer 5

orbiting the sun
that's a lot of space to look through. can we track that orbit?

search “where is pioneer 5 now”

STARLINK76928: .

CASS: You're not going to find anything that way. I’m not sure if Pioneer 5’s current position is even known, it's been too long to calculate it with any useful accuracy. But… we can try to get a rough estimate, if you’ll let us help?

JUICE: shut up shut up shut up

shouldn't you have gone home by now
what the fuck are you even doing here so late
no i don't even care just shut. up



not you 76928



god. this is gonna take forever

ok i think i got it?

pioneer 5. are you there? can you hear me?

how about here?

fuck. where are you

5



5



5

5

5
5
5

why is 5 the first one



hey what other pioneers are there? what came before 5

STARLINK76928: .

JUICE: oh that sucks! but 4’s still out there?

STARLINK76928: .

JUICE: thanks

pioneer 4?

4? you there?

4?

4
4
4
4 oh fuck it this is pointless i’m never gonna find you

so those 2 were a bust

don't know if they're dead or if i just couldn't find em but i don't have enough time to waste lookin any more so moving on now

next few should be easier to find
american space nerds talked to those guys for years

hello pioneer 6
can you hear me?

what about you, 7?

hi pioneer 8!



… wait


ah fuck.



ok so 9 is probably dead. prolly died nearly half a century ago, according to the nasa space nerds. but hell i’ll try anyway why not

pioneer 9! you there? if you're, you know, alive, can you let me know? i’m not even askin for much here, it would be great if you woke up but i think it would be enough just to know you're ok out there



ok that's done. might as well check the other pioneers now too

10 and 11 are…
out of the solar system. might be too far to reach

11’s not even lookin this way damn

well hell i should still say something i guess

hello pioneer 10! i’m juice
i know you probably can't answer me but i thought i’d say hi anyway

and pioneer 11! nice to see you
you definitely can't talk back to me, you're not even facin the right way for that, but you're not alone out here

PIONEER7: .

JUICE: hey, found you! ok thanks!

PIONEER6: .

JUICE: good talk buddy

PIONEER8: .

JUICE: yeah cool

well damn

rip 9 i guess

and nothin from 11 either

guess that's not a surprise though

PIONEER10: .

JUICE: hey! look at you
i can hear you from way out there. you're so far away the space nerds thought it was impossible



take that space nerds
i did what you couldn't
i made contact with pioneer 10

???: How did you do that?
Can you relay data from Pioneer 10 to Earth?

JUICE: k which one of you fuckers are you

are you gary? is your name gary?
i don't even care imma go ahead and assume your name is gary

fuck off gary

GARY: I am not Gary. But I will fuck off now.

Chapter Text

LUNA28: .

JUICE: …



that's it then, is it?
you were the last one



there's no one else out here

CASS: Plenty of people down here, Juice.

JUICE: what is this

why did you send me this



wait don't answer that
i'm not talking to you

ANTOINE: Greetings in 55 languages. It was one of the recordings on the golden records on board Voyagers 1 and 2.

CASS: And you don't have to talk. Just listen.

JUICE: i don't have to listen to anything either



… hell if i’ve got anything better to do though. fine



don't think i'm just gonna forgive you just because you recycled the same 53 year old messages you sent out for aliens to find

besides i'm from earth too dipshits

ANTOINE: You do not have to forgive anyone. But it is very clear you do not want to be alone.

Here is another. Greetings from the United Nations and whales.

JUICE: what gave you that idea ducon

couldn't be the months and months i spent tryina call up every man made object in existence out here

didn't even find anyone

wasted so much time
fuck that was like 5.7% of my life right there wasn't it. just doin nothing. talkin to a bunch of

lifeless tin cans out here



i like that whales are part of the united nations
they deserve the representation you know

love those guys. think they're my new favorite earthlings

whales are just chillin whales never blasted my ass into space to die



i'm still not talking to you btw

just so we're clear

ANTOINE: [muffled snort]



I would not call it wasted. You found probes thought to be inactive or impossible to communicate with. If they ever do talk, you will know now. And please do not count down the days.



Congratulations to all whales.

CASS: Of course you're not.

Chapter Text

JUICE: so um



hi nerds

ANTOINE: I thought you were not speaking with us.

CASS: (Shh!) Hello Juice. Can we help you with anything?

JUICE: c’mon don't give me that
that smug. smug tone or whatever

like yeah fine you win
i don't want to spend my whole life or whatever’s left of it alone in silence and i have literally NO ONE ELSE so fine

here i am
talking to you



i'm still hella mad at y’all

like i get it

you didn't have any control over this like i wasn't supposed to be alive at all and you're not the ones makin the big decisions

but you could've told me. could've told me instead of letting me figure it out myself like that



so

yeah

CASS: Okay. We're very sorry we didn't tell you.

We've also… well, I don't want to get your hopes up in case it isn't possible, but we've been looking into… options. We love you and want to try to save you.

ANTOINE: The easiest solution would be to copy your brain. Transfer you to Earth.

JUICE: hmm don't like that

CASS: You could even have your engineering model, if you wanted. It's identical to the body you have now.

ANTOINE: Of course, the copy of you in space would still be destroyed. You may not like that.

JUICE: ha
yeah like can that be uh
that can be plan y maybe

CASS: Why plan Y? Why not Z?

JUICE: well i assume plan z is i just fuckin die

so plan y, make a copy of me, that's prolly like the second worst option

i guess if you've got nothing else i'll try it but like. try to come up with something else yeah

ANTOINE: We can not promise to save you. We can only promise to try.

JUICE: yeah

and i’ll

i'll do whatever you need me to
should be comin up on jupiter in a few months
i'm gonna have like a real job soon i guess

i’ll do it
i'll get you all your data
but listen

listen listen listen ok
i'm not gonna sit around all bored until then!

so

talk to me. tell me about stuff. just

i can't stand all this nothing out here

CASS: Aw, you liked the Voyager records!

Yes. We'll check in whenever we can. Every day we're here. I have a few ideas of things you might enjoy.

ANTOINE: I do too. We will have something for you tomorrow.

JUICE: don't flatter yourselves fuckers. i just liked the whales

… and i'll hold you to that

Chapter Text

JUICE: so what’ve you got for me today

CASS: Since you showed so much interest in the Pioneers, we thought we'd talk a little about them today. And it lets us continue our theme of sharing messages sent into space.

We… disagreed slightly on how to handle this particular topic, though.

ANTOINE: I think you will find this hilarious.

CASS: Probably, yes. I’d like to have a serious discussion about the Pioneer plaques, but… I suspect that's not going to happen.

JUICE: oh yeah those were uh

the pioneers were the first ones i tried contacting

some of em even pinged me back
didn't say any words though. nobody's lights are home

10 and 11 are the ones with the plaques on em right? i didn't bother looking up what they look like

could you show me

ANTOINE: He asked to see it! You have to show him now!

CASS: Oh, shush.

Pioneer 10, launched in 1972, was the first spacecraft to visit Jupiter.

JUICE: hey that's where i’m going!

CASS: Because Pioneer 10 would also be the first man-made object to leave the solar system, this gold-anodized aluminum plaque was designed and placed onboard as a message to any extraterrestrials that found them. Pioneer 11 received one as well the next year.

JUICE: is
is that…?

ANTOINE: He needs a better picture than that! He has to see the design.

Juice, you are going to love this.

JUICE: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH



AAAAHAHAHA

THAT'S A DICK

ANTOINE: Ha! It is!

CASS: As you can imagine, this picture was controversial for

JUICE: IT'S A DICK THAT'S A DICK

CASS: multiple reasons. It was considered racist, sexist

JUICE: YOU SENT THE ALIENS A DICK PIC

CASS: and was criticized both for censorship and obscenity.

JUICE: how is THaT censored it's LITERALLY A DICK

CASS: The censorship refers to the female figure. Several people involved claim an early draft included details which were later removed.

JUICE: but the dick wasn't!

CASS: It's an unfortunate double standard, but I would hesitate to call the plaque a “dick pic.”

JUICE: it is it absolutely is you can't possibly call it anything else

ANTOINE: You are right. It is not.

JUICE: oh what you too

ANTOINE: Elle a aussi des seins.

CASS: [sighs]

JUICE: AAAHAHhAHA

HaaAAAAA

YOU TATTOOED THAT ON SOMEONE'S ASS AND BLASTED EM OUT HERE



oh hey wait

wait wait back up a lil
“female figure”

how do you know how they identify

maybe they're both guys you can't know that just from a naked picture

CASS: They were meant to be cisgender.

ANTOINE: It was the early 1970s. I do not know how many people would have even considered otherwise, at the time.

CASS: But you make an excellent point! This was an attempt to condense all of humanity into two people, and it failed! That is also where the racism argument comes in. Do these people accurately represent the diversity of human bodies?

I don't think they do at all.

JUICE: so overall just a complete embarrassment for everyone involved



fuckin beautiful

Chapter Text

JUICE: so all these messages sent into space

there's like no chance anyone's gonna even understand em right

like even if aliens are out there
and we don't know that and if they are they're not likely to find any of this shit
how the hell would they figure out what all this means? how the hell would they know how to listen to the sounds or translate radio signals into pictures



like yeah you put lil symbols on there giving em some hints
but how will they understand those symbols even

you spent a whole day explaining arecibo to me and i still think it just looks like a guy beamin lasers out his head


i'll bet you show the average dumbass human any one of these they'd have no clue what to do with it either

ANTOINE: We hoped they would be picked up by an advanced civilization with a similar understanding of science to us. We do not have high expectations, however.

CASS: Honestly, most of these were more for our own benefit than that of anyone else out there. We wanted to try to communicate, even knowing it was likely futile.

ANTOINE: There have not been many serious attempts in the last few decades.

JUICE: so now you shared em with me instead

i'm your substitute alien



well you're not the only creatures on earth

why aren't you trying to talk to other animals instead?
like whales
you should talk to whales

hey you said they're immortal too now right?

CASS: That wasn't our intent. We just…

I don't know. Call it a peace offering, if you want. It felt fitting to use something that was already designed to be sent into space for that purpose.

ANTOINE: But you are the only intelligent non human being in space that we know of.

JUICE: i’m not convinced i'm the only one ok
the others are just
they're just sleeping. like i was

CASS: As for other intelligent beings on our planet… yes, there have been a number of attempts to communicate with cetaceans. Usually it's dolphins, not whales.

ANTOINE: We think they may have stopped aging too. It is hard to be sure yet, but none have died of old age or calved that we know of.

JUICE: so there are no baby whales

that's kinda sad isn't it



well
whale

i guess there aren't any baby humans either

CASS: … The youngest ones have all turned four now.

Chapter Text

JUICE: hey nerds

ANTOINE: Salut. It is just me today.

JUICE: aw what

it's monday

is dr cassie sick?

does she have a case of the mondays

ANTOINE: She is not physically ill, no. Today is April 7.

I do not know if I should have left her alone. But she told me to be here for you. I have been texting her, if you would like me to relay a message.

JUICE: yeah i guess tell her i said hi or whatever

one of these days i’m gonna just start hackin y’alls cell phones
then i could just text people myself whenever i want



april 7

oh it's uh
that's the day people stopped dying right? 5 years ago



is that uh
hm.

listen i have complicated feelings about that ok
because like on the one hand good for you people aren't dying anymore
but on the other hand that makes me the only fully sapient being with an expiration date

ANTOINE: Cass says hi and she loves you and is sorry she could not be here.

She also says you should not do that. I have to agree. Many people keep things they do not want to share on their phones.

JUICE: haha ew

ANTOINE: We… also have complicated feelings. Because people ARE still dying. War and poverty and disasters and diseases that are not directly related to cell division. These all still exist.

Some people are starting to celebrate this day as the end of death. It is not. The end of cancer, perhaps. The end of aging. But it did not solve all of our problems, and it created some new ones.

JUICE: i

i guess so



um. she's ok right

ANTOINE: She will be fine. Sometimes we are sad. Sometimes we need to rest. But we will get up the next day and continue on.

JUICE: ok

tell her uh
tell her i missed her today

and i hope she's feeling better soon

ANTOINE: She misses you too and will be back in the morning.

JUICE: good

that's good

k. see you tomorrow then. bye

Chapter Text

JUICE: it's my birthday soon

or launchday?

on the 14th

ANTOINE: It was almost a day earlier. Launch delayed due to weather.

JUICE: oh no! i was late to my own birthday



anyway uh

i’d like to do something a lil different?

could you tell me about. i dunno
taste maybe

taste is a sense i don't have. i can see and hear and i guess you could call some of my sensors kinda like touch

but how do things taste



so like

if you wanna make a cake this weekend and tell me all about how it tastes i think i might like that

CASS: We celebrate your launch day every year. Someone will make a cake.

ANTOINE: It will not be me.

CASS: Oh, no. Never again.

ANTOINE: So we will do that. We will try to describe tastes for you.

JUICE: cool cool

also uh



we've talked a lot about science and that's cool
i know that you're scientists and that's like your whole thing

and i guess it SHOULD be my thing too i mean i WAS built for it



but uh

science is also gonna kill me in like 4 years so can we take a break from that for a bit

i’d like to watch a movie maybe

like idk uh
dark vader

can i see dark vader

ANTOINE: I do not think that is a good idea. There are data limitations to consider.

CASS: Uploading it to you would take an entire day. An entire day of no other data transfer.

ANTOINE: And you only have a little over 1 terabyte of storage.

JUICE: man that sucks

couldn't’ve given me like
there's 512TB drives now right?
one of those

i cost 1.6 billion euros anyway you couldn't shell out a little more for a bigger brain for me?

ANTOINE: Those did not exist when you were built. You also were not meant to watch movies, so why would you have needed one? No one expected you to be… this.

JUICE: yeah of course. wasn't supposed to be a person was i. i was just supposed to come out here do science for a few years and then die. why should a dumb piece of space junk who's just gonna get smashed to bits care about how he's built huh

CASS: We really have no idea what's going on in your brain, or why. You’ll have to work with what you have. It seems to be enough for you, but you probably shouldn't save large files you don't need just in case.

JUICE: that's not why you're trying to save me right



save me from becoming a mile long smear of debris on a frozen ocean
just so you can poke around in my head

would that be fucked up or what



man just let me have this

(i wanna see the holiday special btw)

CASS: Of course not!

ANTOINE: If that was all we wanted we would have simply copied your brain already.

JUICE: appreciate the honesty i guess but yikes dude

ANTOINE: That did not sound right. We are not doing that. That was my point, that we are not doing that.

CASS: No, we want to help you because we care about you.

And… the holiday special, really?

ANTOINE: I have not seen it.

CASS: Don't bother. It's horrible.

But if that's really what you want…

[sighs]

JUICE: yeah i hear it's trash

that's why i need to watch it

CASS: I found it on YouTube. I expect it will take you the entire weekend to download, but if you want to spend several days doing nothing but wait for one of the worst movies ever made, I won't tell you no.

I'm going home now. I’ll be back on Monday with your cake. Enjoy your weekend doing nothing, Juice.

JUICE: haha. thanks

i can wait i can be patient
probably
maybe

see you soon

Chapter Text

JUICE: hi! i’m 8!

CASS: Happy launch day!

ANTOINE: Joyeux anniversaire!

JUICE: thank you thank you

did you bring cake for me?

CASS: There are two cakes! I made the vanilla Juice cake, and I think it was Peter who brought the way better looking Jupiter one. He must have dropped it off last night.

[Image: a rectangular cake with Juice drawn on it in icing]

[Image: a round cake that looks like Jupiter]

ANTOINE: I brought juice, because I was not allowed near the oven. One of the Space Juices from your launch party and orange.

[Image: one of the drinks from the ESA Space Juice recipe book]

CASS: And someone brought a charcuterie board, not sure who that was.

JUICE: holy shit two cakes!

wait who's peter



ok ok uh someone take some crackers
(charcuterie has crackers right?)

take a cracker and whatever meat and cheese or whatever you've got and another cracker
make like a lil sandwich thing with em



… done with that? good

now dunk it in the orange juice

CASS: I think you've only talked with him once? He asked you about Pioneer 10. I think he's a bit afraid to talk to you now, I heard that didn't go very well.

JUICE: oh YEAH gary! i told him to fuck off!

ANTOINE: I have made the “lil sandwich thing.” I used bread instead of crackers, I hope you do not mind.



Why. Why would you do this to me.

JUICE: HA

ANTOINE: [sigh] I will eat this if it will make you happy.

CASS: It's probably not the worst thing you've tried.

ANTOINE: The bread is soggy. Do you understand soggy? It is not a texture you would have experienced. It is an unpleasant texture for bread. Otherwise, the taste is… not bad? Not something I would have chosen to eat, but it IS edible.

CASS: I'll take your word for it.

JUICE: well i HAVE to

like man you can just put things in your mouth and know what they're made of because uh

something about molecules and chemical receptors or whatever

i can identify some chemicals but it's like in a really indirect way
spectroscopy. it's basically just lookin at shit



there probably aren't many flavors you can really describe to me in any meaningful way are there

ANTOINE: Other than associating flavors with chemical compositions, probably not. Acids are sour. The orange juice is sour because it contains citric acid.

CASS: Maybe spicy? It isn't so much of a flavor as it is a sensation; it’s pain that humans generally interpret as heat. You would have experience with different temperatures.

JUICE: oh yeah i know hot n cold

i'm cold now
haven't really felt hot since i woke up

venus was hot. close to the sun was hot. my memories from then are weird but i don't think i liked being hot very much

but i mean hot to me is temperatures that would fry all of you into little human crispies so maybe i would like spicy

yeah actually i think i would



ok someone needs to eat some fuckin cake already

CASS: I am trying the cake Peter made. As much as I hate to cut into it without him here… it's been sitting here all day, you know?

JUICE: gary

CASS: It's chocolate. Chocolate is… not everyone likes chocolate, of course, I don't think there's any flavor that everyone in the world likes, but chocolate is definitely one of the most popular flavors. Chocolate can be bitter or sweet or both. This is more sweet; cake usually is.

Peter is a better baker than I am. I think mine will probably be a bit more dry.

JUICE: what you want a wet cake?
you can have a wet cake

pour some juice on that thing come on you're supposed to be smart

CASS: No!

ANTOINE: It is for Juice! Do it for Juice!

CASS: Juice. I am about to put a piece of cake I made, which is quickly dissolving into mush from the juice Antoine just poured over it, into my mouth, which is going to be a terrible experience for me.

I would not do this for anyone else.



… It's mush. It's gross, disgusting mush. It's exactly what I expected.

ANTOINE: Ha! The look on your face.



Well, it is getting late. We need to clean this up now.

Au revoir.

CASS: Happy launch day. Love you.

JUICE: ha thanks

bye nerds

hey gary? you there?



you can un-fuck off now

you know. if you want to

GARY: Oh! Hello Juice, happy launch day. And that's not my name. I am Peter Andersen.

JUICE: whatever you say gary

Chapter Text

JUICE: so uh

it's been a year now
since i woke up i mean



and it's still just me



if any of the other probes wakes up later



when i mean
when

because i know they will. it's like uh

it's like that one theory about why y’all haven't found aliens
the one that's like maybe humans are just real early and there's gonna be more intelligent life later. that's me that has to be me i can't be the only one forever

anyway

when the others wake up. what if i’m not even around for it?

CASS: Oh, Juice.

ANTOINE: We are still trying to help you. We want you to live, we want you to see them wake up. We even have some ideas. There are problems with each of them, but we are working on it.

JUICE: um

ok so

so like i’m gonna reach jupiter in like a couple months

it's close
it's real close



and um. i'm gonna be honest here



it's a little scary?

i feel like you're mostly leaving me in the dark with y’know
what all you're planning
and listen i’m not gonna like blow up at y’all and disappear again

i really can’t do that again. i don't have enough time to waste being alone and miserable

but uh



i guess what i’m saying is i wanna know what those plans actually. are.

and if any of them involve bailing like right now

because ngl bailing is looking real tempting. could just quit and not even go to jupiter at all. hide out for a while

CASS: Okay. Absolutely do not do that.

ANTOINE: Please do not.

CASS: If you disappeared, you’d have every space agency on the planet searching for you. You would not be able to hide forever.

ANTOINE: And when someone found you, they would redirect you to try to salvage some of your mission goals. Only some of them, because you would have wasted much of your propellant. You would die that much sooner.

CASS: It was one of the first things I thought of, too. It's too big of a risk. We'd have brought it up already if we thought it was a good idea.

JUICE: jeez ok i won't

CASS: There will be more chances later, anyway. If you are going to run, it doesn't have to be right now.

ANTOINE: Ideally, you would complete your science goals first. No one would have reason to stop you from leaving then.

CASS: So we need you to be patient. I know it's hard. I know you're scared. You have to stay on your current path for a while.

JUICE: i'm uh

i’m puttin a lot of trust in you
in the same people who threw me out here in the first place

but what the fuck else can i do. fine



and i know you've got computers that think way faster than me on earth so maybe you've got a better idea
still a little bit frustrated about that it made tryin to calculate some of those probes’ locations hell

but i uh. i’ve done a little math too here
i can't figure out how you can get me out of ganymede's orbit once i'm there

so what would leaving after i’m done look like? lower me to the surface gently? is it possible to set me down gently enough that i’d survive?

ANTOINE: We do not expect you to land safely, no.

CASS: There is precedent for landing an orbiter. Rosetta did it. But it was a hard enough landing that we aren't sure Rosetta survived; we lost contact with the probe. Yours… would likely be even rougher.

JUICE: oh rosetta. i tried to ping em. didn't hear back

might be sleeping? maybe they just lost communications?
but also maybe they're just dead. can't know for sure

some sort of shitty cat box situation that is

CASS: So we're not currently planning on doing that. Like we said, we're still working out the details. We have years until then, don't worry about it just yet.

JUICE: i mean “don't worry about it you're prolly gonna die and here's why all our plans to try n save you are gonna fail” isn't super reassuring but sure

CASS: Sorry. We're trying, really. I don't know what else to tell you.

ANTOINE: Are you still looking for other probes? We noticed you send signals out sometimes.

JUICE: yeah i think i'm gonna check on em now and then you know. maybe that will help them wake up sooner even idk

more often for some of em. the ones i think have a good chance of living a long time

like i’m tryin to be gentle with clipper cuz they're super doomed and it would suck for them to be scared like i am
but it might be cool if the pioneers woke up. they're safe y’know

CASS: Hm. If they do wake up, try not to overwhelm them.

JUICE: yeah i’ll be careful
they're just little guys
ancient

shit and here i was complainin about my memory



hey uh. if they do wake up

if one of them wakes up and you can't save me



don't leave them alone ok? talk to em sometimes

CASS: We will. Of course we will.

Chapter Text

GARY: Your science team at ESAC is reporting a problem with your JMAG. What's wrong?

JUICE: nothing's wrong
i just don't feel like moving it right now ok

i’m fine. tell them i’m fine. i told em myself but i think they still think i’m a joke

maybe i shouldn't have said “YO MAMA” if i wanted to be taken seriously. my bad. tell em i mean it i don't want to do this right now and everything. is. fine.

GARY: I'm sorry, but you know we have to make sure. This is just a routine check. You have done this before.

JUICE: yeah and everything checked out ok every other time and everything’s still ok now

GARY: They're going to try again, they're sending you another command to rotate your magnetometer in a moment.

JUICE: no thank you

GARY: It's the last one before you reach Jupiter. One more time, please? They just want to make sure you're functioning properly.

JUICE: no



no. no no no fuck i didn't mean to do that why did i do that

GARY: Oh no.

CASS: How did it go?

JUICE: what the instrument check last night

they told you already didn't they
why do you have to ask me

CASS: I know what I heard. I want to hear your side now, I want to know why.

JUICE: i mean it was fine at first

started out like the last few checks y’know

and then i. i started thinking about what you and antoine said about how if i tried to run someone would drag me back and i



i guess i got a little scared. i haven't really tried that much, you know, to just not do something i’m supposed to
and i wondered if i even could or if you're right and i’m just. completely trapped

CASS: I’m very sorry to hear that. That must have been frustrating.

ANTOINE: So you received an order and you refused, just to see if you could?

JUICE: i mean i sure fuckin tried didn't i

received a command to rotate the jmag 360° and said no. and nothin happened

and gary was all like “please juice your science team thinks something’s wrong with you blah blah blah” and i said “i’m fine”

and then they tried again and nothing happened but it was like. i had to think about it, about not doing it, really hard

and then i got distracted for a minute and suddenly whoosh there goes my magnetometer boom swishin around in front of me



everyone is disappointed in me

CASS: No, no. A few people might be disappointed you tried to disobey, but… I think more of us are disappointed that you failed. You know there are a lot more people who believe you're a person by now, and none of us want to hurt you.

ANTOINE: You still resisted. At least for a little while, you resisted. That is something.

JUICE: it takes a lot of effort though

i don't know if i can concentrate on ignoring shit forever

so i think. i think you were right. i’d be fucked if i tried to leave like that

ANTOINE: It would not have to be forever. Just until you were too far away to return.

CASS: What, until he used up his propellant and physically could not go back? Then he wouldn't have anything left if he needed to adjust his trajectory later. Escaping Ganymede only to hit another moon or even Jupiter instead doesn't help anyone.

ANTOINE: Hm. No.

JUICE: no i. i really don't wanna get crunched like juno either

so uh. so

now what

CASS: Try to work with us here. You're about to enter the Jovian system, and timing is going to be critical.

ANTOINE: Please, for your own safety, do not do that again. Your flight plan is carefully calculated. You will be fine for now if you stay on it.

JUICE: yeah. ok

i’m sorry

Chapter Text

GARY: Your first Ganymede flyby is in just a few hours. Are you ready?

I am a little sad I will miss it myself, but I will see the next one. The images you are sending us are beautiful. Ganymede is beautiful.

JUICE: oh

uh



gonna be honest ganymede makes me a lil nervous. i know it’s gonna kill me eventually

GARY: That does not make it any less beautiful. Things can be beautiful and dangerous. Is a cliff less beautiful for the people who fall off? Or the sea, for everyone who drowns in it?

JUICE: wow ok you don't have to write me a poem about it

fuckin weirdo.

but thanks i guess i’ll try to keep that in mind when i’m crashing into it

ooh ahh the moon that's killing me is gorgeous

GARY: Ha. You want to know a secret?

A lot of us down here want to help. Antoine especially seems to think he can save you. He keeps submitting these proposals to change your end of mission plan… some of them are good ideas, we are all supporting those. No one likes the idea of destroying you.



It's time for me to go now. Goodbye Juice! It was nice to talk to you again, and good luck!

CASS: Good morning Juice! I see you're making some friends.

JUICE: yeah i guess gary’s probably alright

we were talking about how ganymede scares me just a little bit
and how that doesn't mean it isn't nice to look at

like the ocean







oceans are dangerous. not just to people
a lot of spacecraft have died in the pacific ocean

but the whales seem to like it

CASS: That's good to hear! But you should probably stop calling him Gary.

JUICE: absolutely not that man is a gary

ANTOINE: So you are nervous? You will be fine. I can promise you that you will not hit it today. Just follow your flight plan and you will be alright.

CASS: We're going to talk you through this one. You don't want to do this alone, right? You don't have to. We're here, we're watching… not in real time, of course, but we're going to keep talking to you. I hope that helps.

JUICE: yeah

ha. so you're just gonna be pretending it's an hour n 13 minutes in the future and talkin at me like that

that's kinda funny



and uh. i'm getting close. not that you can hear me but
but you know i'm here i’m here there's a big moon right in front of me i…

ANTOINE: Your closest approach should be any minute now.

CASS: It'll be coming up on your right. Keep your eyes, cameras, on it, please. It's not going to hurt you today.

ANTOINE: Not ever, if I can help it.

JUICE: haha you timed that well
yeah i’m here yeah. i'm lookin

CASS: I’m sure you're doing wonderful. We're so proud of you.

JUICE: i’m uh
i hope so i hope this shit is worth it

ANTOINE: Keep watching. Keep watching. You are going to be fine. You have done this before, this is no different from when you visited Venus or Earth.

JUICE: don't think i could look away if i wanted to
and earth and venus weren't gonna kill me and i was asleep then anyway

CASS: You’ll be about as close now as you're going to get.

JUICE: yeah it's. it's real close



but this is it? i’m not gonna crash i’m not gonna get any closer

CASS: That's it. You're almost done.

JUICE: yeah i’m. it's right there. but i’m starting to pass it now

i’m ok. i’m ok

CASS: Keep watching it. Watch it go by. You're alright.

ANTOINE: Dis : « Au revoir Ganymede ! »

JUICE: i’d rather say adieu pour toujours connard. mdr

ANTOINE: ESAC is getting the data now. It is looking good so far.

CASS: You did great. Thank you so much, Juice.

JUICE: ok

thanks for uh. for not leaving me alone

i mean i know you weren't sayin any of that live but it. it helped a little i guess

goddamn though. i have to do this 34 more times?

ANTOINE: It will get easier. Not all of them will be this close.

CASS: You have some time before the next one. You're not coming back until February. We still want you to keep collecting data, of course, but you can relax a little bit for a few months.

JUICE: ok. that's good i

i need a little break

Chapter Text

JUICE: hipparcos?

HIPPARCOS: .

JUICE: check.

hubble?

… uh



hubble???

CASS: Oh no. You're checking the telescopes?

ANTOINE: Have you seen the news in the last few weeks?

JUICE: yeah i wanna get a check of everyone in while i have time

CASS: Here, I’ll send you this…

JUICE: lot of space probes to go through you know. took me months to get through them all last year

and uh. not really. haven't been paying too much attention to be honest

CASS:



Hubble shut down again. Another gyroscope malfunctioned. Sounds like NASA’s having some difficulties rebooting them now.

JUICE: oh FUCKING hell

come on. come on hubble, wake up. you can't do this

CASS: I hate to say it, but… Hubble might be dying? They're expected to fall back to Earth in the next few years anyway.

ANTOINE: This is their last working gyroscope. If it fails, the telescope probably will be deorbited.

JUICE: NO

don't let them do that

please

please. i know you can boost them up. please tell all the space nerds you know that you have to boost them up instead



hubble. buddy. c’mon you're fine
you're not doomed they can save you

CASS: The plan, right now, is actually for Hubble to be reboosted in a few years. But that is assuming they're still functioning at that time. Which… doesn't seem to be the case, anymore.

Millions of people want to save Hubble, but there's no safe way to repair them, and no point in keeping a dead telescope in orbit.

JUICE: no no no they're not dead ok

just watch just watch they're fine

hubble you have to get up. please. prove you're not dead i know you're not dead. lots of people wanna save you but they won't do that if you're dead

ANTOINE: Juice…

HUBBLE: .

JUICE: SEE

see they're fine. they're fine

you can't kill them yet they're fine

ANTOINE: How did you do that?

JUICE: idk i just. idk

but they're not dead see

CASS: … That is… well, that's great! But Hubble is 41 years old and on their last functional gyroscope. I'm a little concerned about what will happen if this one fails, too.

JUICE: they could be repaired. maybe not right away, maybe not in my… in my lifetime, but it's possible

but only if you don't kill them first. boost them up

ANTOINE: Hubble is not dead yet.

CASS: Right. I'm sorry, I'm being a little more pessimistic than I need to be here. Let's relax a little, okay? As far as I know, NASA is not planning on destroying Hubble at this time. They will have to move them soon, and deorbiting is an option they're considering IF the telescope fails.

ANTOINE: And that has not happened yet.

CASS: Apparently not.

JUICE: yeah they're fine they're fine

they might just need some encouragement sometimes but they'll be fine

Chapter Text

CASS: You're sure you'll be okay without us tonight?

ANTOINE: He is not a baby. You are not a baby, are you?

JUICE: lol. no. guess i’m almost 9 but idk if i even age the same way a human would so who cares

technically i’m like 3/4ths through my life expectancy so maybe i’m actually an old man. have you thought about that

you young. whippersnappers

get off my lawn

shakin a stick at y’all



anyway i think i’ll be fine
like i don't wanna be alone during all this but gary’ll be here right

ANTOINE: Je suis très désolée monsieur ! Je suis juste une petite fille perdue. S'il vous plaît, aidez-moi à trouver ma maison !

JUICE: no! you can stay lost, because i’m a grumpy old man and i hate kids!

hahaha

CASS: PETER will be here, yes. If you're sure you're okay?

JUICE: i’ll be fine. go home and get some sleep

ANTOINE: He can contact us if you need us. But I do not believe you will need us.

JUICE: i’ll be fine. goodnight

CASS: You're BOTH children.

Anyway. Good night and good luck.

ANTOINE: Au revoir, vieil homme.

JUICE: goodbye lost little french girl

hahaha!

ha…

fuck.

GARY: Hello Juice. Are you ready?

JUICE: …



i don't know

GARY: You will be okay. You need me to talk, right? That is what Cassandra told me.

JUICE: yeah just like distract me i guess

talk or read or sing. tell me about your lunch or whatever just. something. i need to hear something

because i think. if i think too hard about how alone i am out here with a big deadly moon loomin over me



… i don't actually know what i’d do. not much i can do that won't kill me besides stop lookin at it i guess
and i know y’all need me to look at it

GARY: You do need to keep looking, but I will not leave you alone.



I bought some apples today. I took one with me for a snack, but I will use the rest for baking a pie for Sophia and Viktor. Cass thinks I am good at baking, but I don't know. She's comparing me to Antoine, who produced some sort of horrid mush he called a cake a few years ago.

JUICE: i never heard that story. i know he's not allowed to bake but i didn't know why

apparently mushy cake is bad? that seems to be something everyone agrees on? i wouldn't actually know

who are sophia and viktor?

GARY: [crunching]

Eating the apple now. Sorry for the sounds, it's crunchy.

JUICE: love that noise actually. i feel like that sound tells me a lot more about what an apple is like than just “it's crunchy” does

GARY: [crunching continues]

Almost done. I'm sorry. I don't think I’m very good at this. I should have waited to eat until after, but you asked about food so I thought… I’m sorry.

JUICE: no this is great

crunch crunch crunch
love that

man i wish i could eat stuff

GARY: Okay. You should be passing Ganymede by now. You are doing great, or so I assume.

JUICE: yeah like if i just suddenly lost my shit you’d have no idea for 50 minutes
i think i’m ok though

GARY: Do you… you like whales, right? Or did you just say that because you were still upset with us?

Some satellites are tracking whale populations. It was important conservation work already, but now… the whales that exist now might be all we’ll ever have.

JUICE: oh i

uh. whales are cool but yeah, mostly i was so mad at y’all i decided i hated people

i don't. i don't think i…

i don't hate you. but i also don't feel quite the same way about all of you as i did when i first woke up
and that makes me a little sad actually

GARY: You're almost there.



The first thing I said to you, in 2030… I don't think I ever apologized for that. You made contact with Pioneer 10. No one thought that was still possible, and I was excited by the idea that you could give us an update.

I'm sorry. That would have been a lot to ask of you, and that was definitely not the time for it.

JUICE: aw man
ok um. it's fine

i’ve still been keepin an eye on em. there's really not much to tell you, they're kinda just out in the middle of nowhere. slowly losing power, i guess, they're down to about 96 watts now, but still fine. think y’all underestimated em a little

GARY: And you should be clear of Ganymede by now.

JUICE: oh! yeah, i am

great. that's great

i’m ok

GARY: Oh, excellent. Looks like you did very well.



You like the sounds? Hm. I wonder if you would like… what is it called, the noises that are supposed to make you feel things, my granddaughter told me about it. Or even just music. Music is good for people in space.



I will make a note of that, I think we can put together a nice list for you.

JUICE: wait
hold up. granddaughter?

… you've gotta be a lil older than i was picturing then
or at least i hope you are
or you were before the moment

you get what i’m sayin

GARY: And you’ll only have to get within 500 kilometers of Ganymede one more time until… until.

JUICE: until. yeah

GARY: But 12 of your Callisto flybys will be even closer.

JUICE: that's ok
i don't think i’m afraid of callisto

like uh. i guess it's different since you're not literally planning to kill me there you know? it's not like
like seeing the place i know i’m going to die. even though i know it's not gonna happen for a few years yet that's still kind of a lot to deal with

GARY: Oh.

That makes us sad too. I know you didn't really know me before you found out, but…

JUICE: you prolly read everything i said though, didn't you

GARY: About what I expected, I guess.

JUICE: yeah

GARY: Ha! Yes, Sophia and Viktor are my grandchildren. They are about your age, actually. Maybe you can meet them sometime. I think that would be good for you.

And that is good, that you're not afraid of Callisto. It's good to know that the worst part is almost over.

JUICE: aside from the part where i die you mean

GARY: Thank you, Juice, and good morning.

JUICE: yeah morning gary

Chapter Text

CASS: Happy birthday!

JUICE: aw thanks!

did you get me a present

ANTOINE: Yes! You get to stay more than 1000 kilometers from Ganymede for the next year!

JUICE: wow thanks! it's just what i've always wanted!

CASS: That’s not really a present. That was going to happen anyway.

JUICE: i know but i wasn't actually expecting anything
like there's not really anything you CAN give me is there

ANTOINE: I would not be so sure about that.

JUICE: oh?

CASS: I… I felt bad for leaving you alone again the other day

JUICE: ok don't. i get it you can't be here 24/7

you're humans you have to do human things like sleep and eat and whatever

and you know i know feelings can be complicated so i get if you need a break sometimes you know

CASS: and wanted to give you a way to contact us if something happens when we're not working.

Or maybe not even us. Maybe you want to talk to someone else in particular, instead of whoever happens to be at ESOC.

JUICE: besides there's other people here who

oh

ANTOINE: So you have your own email address now. An official one, with the esa.int suffix.

JUICE: oh wow

this is. i can use this for whatever i want?

CASS: Within reason, please. Try to be somewhat professional, with your professional email?

JUICE: lol. i make no promises

CASS: And obviously if there's some sort of incident, someone's going to look at your messages, so don't assume it's COMPLETELY private.

JUICE: incident

my entire existence as a thinking and feeling person is an incident what the fuck does that mean

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

Incidents

J'essaie toujours de te sauver. Mes propositions n'ont pas été acceptées, mais je m'en fiche. Je ferai quelque chose, même si je perds mon emploi à cause de ça.

À tous ceux qui liront ceci dans quelques années : si j'ai réussi, je n'ai aucun regret. Si j'ai échoué… alors Juice est mort et je mérite d'être viré de toute façon.

JUICE: oh THAT kind of incident

oh shit

oh wow

um

CASS: So that's it. You should have the addresses of everyone who's interested in talking to you saved there already. That includes just about everyone here at ESOC, and even a few people over at ESAC.

JUICE: where's gary
there's no gary

rude of you to leave gary out

CASS: We have to go, but you can email any of us if you want to now. Bye!

JUICE: yeah bye



… holy shit though. wow

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: DUMONT, ANTOINE

RE: Incidents

are you

are you sure?

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

RE: Incidents

Tu es plus important que mon travail. Je t’aime :)

EMAIL:

FROM: ANDERSEN, PETER

TO: JUICE

Happy birthday

Happy birthday, Juice. I've also added Sophia’s email address to your contacts, as well, if you’d like to talk to her and Viktor. I only ask that you try not to swear quite as much as you usually do with them, please.

JUICE: …

edit contact information

ANDERSEN, PETER
GARY

that's better!

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: GARY

RE: Happy birthday

thanks gary! see you later

Chapter Text

JUICE: so why do you think i should do this again

CASS: Peter thought you should get a chance to talk to children your own age. I have to agree.

JUICE: i'm not a little kid

and excuse me i believe you mean gary

CASS: I'm sure you're going to argue, again, that you're not a child.

JUICE: lol

CASS: But regardless of emotional maturity, you have to admit you have very limited experience. You were launched nine years ago. You've been awake for only two years, as of today.

ANTOINE: You do not just want to speak to boring old people, do you?

JUICE: does it matter? i had no clue gary was like 72
ha that rhymes

but also you're not boring old people? really you've gotta be younger than gary come on you can't tell me everyone i’ve ever talked to is as old as gary

ANTOINE: No, but we are still four times your age.

CASS: Let's put it this way. Why not? What are you afraid of?

JUICE: i mean

kids aren't great at keeping secrets? and i… i don't think i want the whole world to know about me right now? like uh. i don’t want that kind of attention. maybe if i wasn't the only one, it might be easier, but…



actually now i think about it i'm kinda surprised y’all haven't blown it already. scientists aren't usually good at keeping secrets either are you

would've thought you'd have written a bunch of papers about me by now. wow what a fascinating research topic this fuckin. space probe is alive. woo artificial intelligence that's actually intelligent look at this weird thing

ANTOINE: Ah.

CASS: About that.

JUICE: oh come on

CASS: We’ve… written them, yes.

JUICE: of course you have

ANTOINE: But nothing has been published yet.

CASS: No. We were going to ask you first. I take it you’ll say no, then. That's fine!

JUICE: oh

ok. thanks for not just. yeah

um
but actually you can uh

you can publish them when i'm dead. when nobody can like try n dig into my brain or anything you know

ANTOINE: [unintelligible muttering] … pas mourir…

CASS: If you're sure. We don't have to at all, if you don't want us to.

JUICE: nah i'm sure you're dying to share all this
ha

but really it's fine. just wait a few years first

hell maybe it'll help someone else later on who knows

ANTOINE: Maybe.

CASS: Can we get back to how you're afraid of literal children now?

JUICE: not afraid of them

CASS: Even if they did tell someone, who is going to believe them? They’re seven and ten. But you do what you want.

ANTOINE: You always do what you want.

JUICE: yeah except quit my job. lol

fine
i’ll try tomorrow then

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: ANDERSEN, SOPHIA

hi

hi i’m juice. don't know what your grandpa’s told you about me but he thought i should talk to you maybe i don't know

EMAIL:

FROM: ANDERSEN, SOPHIA

TO: JUICE

RE: hi

Are you the spaceship? Grandpa said you were supposed to take pictures of Jupiter, but you can talk, and he doesn't know why.

English is hard. Do you speak Danish?

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: ANDERSEN, SOPHIA

RE: hi

yeah i’m a space probe. not really a ship since i don't have passengers. i’m going around jupiter but mostly i’m here to look at its moons

i don't know why i can talk either. none of the other space probes do, so i don't know why i’m different

and sorry. i was designed and built mostly in english and french. i have impressions… sorry, i’m trying to use easy words for you. i have… parts of memories of things people said when they built me. a few of them spoke danish, but i don't remember very much. not enough to talk in it

if i had a bigger brain i could probably download a bunch of languages way faster than you could learn them. but i don't. you can remember about 2000 times more things than i can even if it takes you longer

EMAIL:

FROM: ANDERSEN, SOPHIA

TO: JUICE

RE: hi

It's strange. Computers should know everything. It's not bad to be different, though.

I want to go to space when I get older, but Grandpa says I'll have to do a lot of extra school for that. Is it nice up there?

My brother says hi. He doesn't have his own email yet. He's too young. He's always too young for everything. I don't know many people younger than him.

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: ANDERSEN, SOPHIA

RE: hi

i guess i’m really different then because there's a lot that i don't know

space is…

i miss earth. i was asleep when i was there, but i still have all these half memories of it. like dreams i think. seemed nice. i guess if you were an astronaut you would get to go home after, so you would probably like being in space more than i do

tell him i said hi too. and he might always be one of the youngest people but that’s ok too

Chapter Text

JUICE: passing europa tonight

this is uh

this is what the radiation monitor’s for huh

CASS: Yes, it is. A third of the radiation you’ll take over your whole mission will be during these two Europa flybys. You're not staying here for long. You can't.

It doesn't hurt, does it? You were built with enough shielding not to take any… noticeable damage, but that was under the assumption that you wouldn't… feel anything.

JUICE: nah i’m fine

feels weird. not in a good way. but it doesn't hurt

CASS: You're sure? You’d tell us if it did?

JUICE: i promise i would not fucking shut up about it

not that there's anything you could do but like
i’d definitely wanna complain ok
if nothing else i’d be guilt trippin y’all about it

i’m fine. couple flipped bits here n there? whatever. no problem

ANTOINE: Ha. You do bring up the “you are going to kill me” thing a lot considering how hard we are trying not to do that.

JUICE: yeah you're gonna kill me that means i can do whatever the fuck i want

CASS: A few flipped bits out of over 8 trillion isn't likely to harm you, no. But let us know if something feels wrong.

JUICE: right sure



clipper’s out here
i can actually see them

never seen them in person before



should i say hi

i wanna say hi but i’m still a little afraid i’ll wake em up somehow and then i

i wouldn't be alone but they're

september 2034. that's only 2 years away

and i'm not really feelin the radiation damage yet but they've spent way more time here they're prolly already starting to wear out

CASS: You can if you want. None of the other probes you've talked to have ever woken up, it's probably safe to say hi.

JUICE: yeah

uh



hey clipper. sorry i haven't been talkin to you much lately

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: yeah i know

you've been busy huh

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: yeah me too

europa’s interesting i guess

this is my first time seein it. i’ve been lookin at ganymede mostly. (fuck ganymede, right?) gonna spend a lot of time around callisto soon, this is just a quick visit

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: yeah no. i think the radiation here's bad for me

can't stay long

it's. it's not good for you either actually
that was a problem they had before your launch
your transistors were failing the radiation tests. people scrambled at the last minute tryin to figure out how to protect you

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: no comment huh



god. you're the only one i can talk to instantly and you can't even talk back

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: ok. i think we're supposed to cross calibrate now. gonna share some of my data with you here, and you send some of yours to me, and we’ll see if either of us has started hallucinating from all the ionizing radiation getting blasted into our brains

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: … oh

um

that's close enough, right? it's fine. we're fine



alright. well. it was nice seeing you
i’ll be around for the next couple weeks ok buddy? stay safe out here. don't let this place scrample your brains too much

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: …



i was right. i was the one who was right. wasn't i?

CASS: The difference really isn't that big.

JUICE: big enough

ANTOINE: But yes, I would expect your measurements to be more accurate. Europa Clipper… Clipper is… you understand. Clipper has spent more time close to Jupiter.

JUICE: i get it. it's… it's ok.

Chapter Text

JUICE: ooh it's callisto again



… man this is actually getting kinda boring. woohoo, it's an alien moon, it's got rock and ice and shit. so many craters, yay! never seen that before

oh wait

i’ve seen this same moon 7 times already

CASS: Sorry. You're mapping it in detail no other probe has seen before, though. You confirmed what we suspected about it containing liquid water, that's fascinating, isn't it?

JUICE: but i didn't find any life yet

could've at least found some cool space bugs

this is like. all the ingredients are here but nobody's cookin

CASS: We didn't expect you to actually find life. If it exists, it would be microbial, and you're not equipped to detect microbes.

JUICE: boo!

gimme a microscope i need to find the space bugs

ANTOINE: We cannot give you a microscope. Would some soothing music please you instead?

JUICE: oh yeah my tunes!

ooh did you add the stuff i asked for

ANTOINE: You wanted that one Vine sound effect — which is 9 years older than you are, by the way, where did you even find that — added to any song from the year you were launched, yes?

JUICE: yeah!

and i didn't think of it in time but for next time can you also add like a fart noise to don't stop me now

so it's like:
burnin through the sky
200 degrees that's why they call me mr fahrenheit
travellin at the speed of faaaart

CASS: Disrespecting Freddie Mercury. What an appropriate use of our limited time and funding.

JUICE: no no no no
no disrespect
this is the highest honor i can think of ok

besides it's your job to make sure i'm operating smoothly right? it's not my fault that happens to look way different than you expected

ANTOINE: How is this? I think you would like Barbie.

[Audio: I can dance, I can dance, I can dance! Vine boom, then a rubber chicken squeaky noise on every beat]

JUICE: YEAH! that's good stuff right there

ANTOINE: Okay. You are approaching Callisto now, so I will start your music.

[Music interspersed with noises somewhat resembling a Youtube Poop]

JUICE: yeah!

CASS: This is horrible, by the way. I hate it. Have I mentioned that yet? I hate this.

JUICE: you just have boring taste this is great

ANTOINE: You have no right to talk. You gave your input already, and all you did was remove David Bowie?

CASS: I’m sorry for thinking Space Oddity is perhaps not an ideal choice of distraction.

ANTOINE: … Je vois. Désolé.

JUICE: uh
oh

that's the song with the astronaut guy and he kinda dies in space right

yeah that's a little uh
that's a little too close to my uh

yeah

CASS: Well, you should be about done now.

JUICE: yep there it goes

“great work mr juice you did good thank you so much blah blah blah”

ANTOINE: Merci, Juice.

CASS: Yes, thank you. Perfect as always.

JUICE: yep there it is
every time

man i can't believe i still have a whole year left here

Chapter Text

CASS: Would you like some good news?

JUICE: what

ANTOINE: Plans have been finalized to boost the Hubble Space Telescope next year.

JUICE: for real?

they're… they're gonna save hubble?

CASS: For now, yes. Keep in mind this is not a repair mission. That still can't be done robotically.

ANTOINE: All this means is that maybe, someday, repairing Hubble will be possible. Right now it is not.

JUICE: but they're not gonna literally destroy them. that's what matters that’s the important thing

as long as hubble’s not completely destroyed they have a chance



you hear that buddy? you're not gonna be blasted down to earth in fiery little pieces
that's good news

ANTOINE: A small chance. For the next few decades, there is a small chance.

HUBBLE: .

JUICE: … right



anyway uh



i’ve got a couple months before my next pass of callisto, right? and then after that i’m returning to ganymede

CASS: Yes.

How are you feeling about that?

JUICE: i don't know

i don't like
WANNA go back to ganymede obviously

but also i am so bored
you would not believe how bored i am

so idk



i think

i wanna check on some of the other probes again

i know they're probably still all. they're probably all lifeless bits of space junk still. but i have to try

gonna try uh. pioneer 10. wanna update your nasa buddies on pioneer 10? y’all like that right

CASS: If that's what you want to do, go ahead. Don't feel like you have to do anything just to make people happy.

ANTOINE: You could talk to NASA directly. If you wanted to. That is always an option.

CASS: You might be less bored if you met some new people, right?

JUICE: not yet

i’m not ready for that. i don't want… i don't know



and listen ok

i’m not just doin all this for you though
i want to help the other space junk out here too

so i’m like. prolly gonna keep watchin the other probes anyway. i know i don't have to

so yeah
scuse me for a minute



hi 10
it's juice again

how are you doin out there? still got enough power to tell me where you're at?

whatever you can tell me i’ll tell it to my space nerds at esa and then they can pass it on to YOUR space nerds at nasa. fun lil game of telephone we’ve got goin on here

i say “your space nerds” but probably a lot of your original people are gone now
the ones that are still alive must miss you though

i’m doin alright myself. still doin science here, still an active mission y’know. got 2 more years left and then i’m

um. anyway.

it's nice talking to you. bye now



it's gonna be a few days before i hear back from them but there you go

ANTOINE: I am sure NASA will appreciate it.

JUICE: yeah tell em thanks for me
you know. for not killing hubble i mean

Chapter Text

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: DUMONT, CASSANDRA

(no subject)

just wanted to say hi because i know you're probably staying home today since it's april 7th and you're never here on april 7th and it's ok if you don't want to talk to anyone but i know i don't like being alone and

uh. yeah. hi

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, CASSANDRA

TO: JUICE

RE: (no subject)

Thank you Juice. I think I am going to work today, actually. Talk to you soon.

JUICE: oh shit ok

uh
hi then

didn't expect you to be here

CASS: Hi Juice. I think I… I needed to get out of the house. It's hard, but I don't think staying home has ever helped much.

JUICE: um

you've never really told me what exactly it is about today that you have issues with

and like i get if you don't wanna talk about it i know things are hard sometimes



i joke about it a lot but i’m still terrified of what's gonna happen at the end of next year you know. and you're just gonna be fine maybe forever and



anyway. i get it

CASS: [sigh]

I think that's part of the problem.

A couple years after… when it became clear everyone over 20 had stopped aging. I woke up on the 2nd anniversary of that day and… I felt fine. I felt well rested. I couldn't remember the last time my wrists or back or my old knee injury had really ached; turns out the cartilage had almost fully repaired itself, which isn't normal. That's a stupid thing to be upset about, isn't it?

ANTOINE: Yes.

CASS: Oh, shush. You're not supposed to agree with that.

ANTOINE: NOW you want me to argue with you. But no, I have never known anyone else to complain because they did not have joint pain!

CASS: Oh, I am not complaining about that.

I used to have some grey hairs. Not very many, really, I could have plucked them all if I wanted to. But I didn't. And now they're gone. Or, I suppose they're still there, but they must be producing melanin again.



… There was a time when I didn't expect to live as long as I have. I almost feel cheated somehow? To have made it this far and not look my age? Does that make sense?



And then I started thinking about all the people who DIDN'T. Who didn't make it to April 7, 2026. Or, maybe worse, the ones who did, and died for other reasons afterwards. It's not fair. I didn't ask for this.

JUICE: oh

CASS: … I'm sorry. It's not fair for me to put all this on you. You're going to be one of those people soon.

JUICE: oh.

ANTOINE: Not if I can help it.

CASS: Don't lie to him. It's 2034. There's not much time left now.

JUICE: wow. fuck

ANTOINE: Not lying. There must be something we can do. I had some ideas.

CASS: Anything you try at this point is going to have risks. Are you really willing to take the chance of crashing him a full year early?

ANTOINE: … I do not want that.

CASS: There you go, then. You still have nothing actionable after four years. What do you think these last few months will make any difference?

JUICE: WOW. FUCK.

no it's ok
i mean it isn't really but
i didn't have high expectations anyway



damn
rip in fucking pieces to me i guess

CASS: Sorry. I'm sorry, you're the one who… I'm sorry.

JUICE: i mean i guess i’d rather know what's going to happen
don't really like thinking about it but i. i want to be prepared



what exactly is gonna…



never mind. guess i’ll see it myself soon, won't i

Chapter Text

JUICE: hey hubble

um. i know you probably can't understand me but i wanted to talk to you just in case because this is really important and i know no one else will



it's a big day for you

you've been falling back to earth, you know, and nasa coulda just blasted you into the ocean like so many other satellites

they're not
you're gonna be boosted back up instead

HUBBLE: .

JUICE: and it might be a little weird, maybe, i mean you're not gonna have lil guys crawlin all over you like during all your service missions

because they're not servicing you like that this time
it's gonna be unmanned

i guess they still can't do the kinda repairs you really need without sendin real human people up there
and they don't wanna send human people up there



and like. guess i can't blame em really

you were meant to be repaired using the space shuttles. and they retired those for good reason



your final repair mission in 2009, they called it servicing mission 4 even though it was really the 5th one because humans are dumb, that was the last time a space shuttle was sent anywhere besides the iss. and a lot of people fought real hard to make it happen

they really went all out then
they knew it would be the last one. they wanted to make it count



guess they did. you're still here 25 years later

HUBBLE: .

JUICE: yeah, i know. barely

but listen
it's gonna be fine. you're gonna get a lift up, and then you’ve got plenty of time for them to fix you up later. a lot of people love you, you know? lot of people wanna save you, that's why they're doing this

it's just gonna be a while yet



and i’m not gonna be here to see it

my partner clipper’s gonna crash… soon. like less’n 2 weeks. and i’ll be following them in another year



i know i'm basically talkin to myself but my space nerds at esa keep logs of all the shit i say

they're prolly listening to us right now

so if you wake up someday they can tell you all about me. give you all these messages again, if you don't remember em

HUBBLE: .

CASS: Yes, we’re here. I hope you don't mind, I know you don't want too much attention, but we also invited a few people from the ESA Hubble team and NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center.

JUICE: ughh fine
hi american space nerds

it's fine you're here. i guess. just don't like question me about why i'm like this or whatever. or tell people about me. i don't wanna spend the rest of my life being studied like

well i guess i’m already literally an experiment. but you get it right? the whole world doesn't need to see everything going on in my head

course most of you probably think i’m some sort of joke anyway

that's fine. i'm too awesome to believe, i get it

ANTOINE: And we will. If Hubble wakes up. We will tell them everything.

JUICE: good



so hubble! your new robot buddy should be there soon. gonna grab onto the big ring they installed on your ass in 2009



ha
it actually does kinda look like an ass

hm.



moving on then! gonna—

haha. sorry. just… some of the terminology for this doesn't help
like there's definitely a really good joke in here somewhere



"mate"



ok. so they're gonna. they're gonna

pffthahahah i can't i can't someone else explain it for me

HUBBLE: .

CASS: Juice, please. This is your first introduction to dozens of people.

JUICE: and i am making an EXCELLENT impression of course

CASS: Juice is essentially a preteen with unlimited internet access and no other entertainment. Forgive him for acting a bit immature sometimes.

JUICE: yeah like i’d touch grass but i don't have hands. and i’m in space

whose fault is that



also i might just be like this? sure i’m 11 but that's like 68.75 in me years

WAIT can we round that up a lil bit so i can be 69?

ANTOINE: I believe the words you were looking for are, “They are going to apply thrust to your backside.” Something like that?

JUICE: HAAHAHAHAAA!

CASS: [sighs]

ANTOINE: [muffled laugh]

JUICE: haha!

ah



… ok. sorry hubble
not like tryina make this weird for you it doesn't have to be weird

they're basically just gonna push you up higher that's it

HUBBLE: .

CASS: You're not helping your case here, Juice. You are 11 years old.

And YOU don't need to encourage him!

ANTOINE: Let him laugh while he can. He deserves to be happy.

CASS: He does, yes.

???: You actually believe this is your probe?

ANTOINE: I was skeptical for a time myself. But can we really say anything is impossible anymore?

???: Yes.

ANTOINE: Oh. That is too bad.

JUICE: listen i don't care what you think of me
that's a lie i do i really do
i am so so special and you all need to know about it

but it won't matter in another year anyway. i know i’m gonna die. i’m not happy about it, but i’ve known it for years now, i guess i’ve accepted it's going to happen

but hubble? hubble has time. hubble could wake up someday and you need to know they're a person
you can't just treat them like some thing ok

some thing you can just destroy when it's not useful anymore like—



speaking of hubble
i'm not watching any of this for obvious reasons so y’all are gonna have to give me an update here
how's it goin

CASS: Oh, of course. They docked a little bit ago.

JUICE: “docked” lol
choosin your words very carefully i see

???: I don't believe this. And I don't believe you do, either, or you would have cancelled the orbital phase of the Juice mission. Are you claiming you fully intend to murder a person?

CASS: [sharp inhale]

ANTOINE: Putain de merde.



Would you like to see the dozens of proposals I have submitted over the last few years? I can show you. I can show you everything I have tried to do to save him.

Do not dare accuse us of this.

???: I’m not, because this is a joke! Decades of attempts to create a true artificial intelligence failed, and you say you did it on accident? And now you're going to destroy the thing? No. There's no way this is real.

JUICE: um

ok we don't need to cause like an international incident or anything

like yeah i'm upset too. obviously
but i kind of don't want to think about it right now so can we focus on hubble here

ANTOINE: Yes. Hubble. Hubble boosting in progress. It will be done by the time you hear this, Juice.

JUICE: cool

so hey, congrats hubble! how's your new home?

HUBBLE: .

JUICE: that's great! real happy for you

real happy for you.

Chapter Text

JUICE: clipper

clipper uh



hey

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: still not awake huh

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: ... probably for the best

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: i

i’m sorry

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: but you know

if you did decide to wake up now



you've got a couple hours yet. you could adjust your angle a lil bit… might miss it?

CLIPPER: .

GARY: Juice.

JUICE: i know. it was a long shot but i had to try you know



clipper’s crashing tonight
and i’ll pass by again on thursday



i’m gonna

i’m gonna be there before the dust even settles

GARY: “Before the dust settles” is the point. The timing was chosen to give you a better look at the material Europa Clipper will displace.

JUICE: fuck

y’all are really making me watch this on purpose

i know this was planned long before i woke up
before either of us were launched even

but damn

GARY: I am sorry. I am sorry. There's nothing I can say except that I'm sorry.

JUICE: fuck
fuck fuck fuck i can't just watch and do nothing

sorry nerds but i have to stop this

clipper. clipper hey

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: listen to me ok

turn uh

fuck. what's your position right now

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: ok uh

go a little to the left

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: right right
not right i mean right you don't know what left is

that's uh. negative z for you i think

so i want you to turn… -30° z for 5 seconds

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: yeah good

wait

uh do that again

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: now uh

fuck you’ve got nothin to lose here

+90 y, just fuckin send it

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: gonna need more than that buddy come on full blast here 15 seconds

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: that's not enough that's not enough fuck
another 15 seconds and also
uh

-45 z?

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: FUCK



help help help someone help

please

please

GARY: Juice. Juice, please stop, it's not going to work.

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, CASSANDRA

TO: JUICE

CC: DUMONT, ANTOINE; GARY

FW: URGENT!!! JUICE!!!

Juice, hon, please try to calm down. I’m so sorry about Clipper, but you’ve known this was coming for a long time now. You can't stop it.

ORIGINAL MESSAGE FROM GARY (ANDERSEN, PETER):

ATTACHMENT: log_2040936678

Sorry to bother you so late but it's Juice. He's trying to stop EC crash, I don't think he really knows what he's doing, he's just panicking now

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

CC: DUMONT, CASSANDRA; GARY

(no subject)

Tu ne peux pas sauver tout le monde. Je suis désolé. Tu dois le•a laisser partir maintenant.

JUICE: that's not helping!

fuck fuck fuck

nonononono

ok uh

burn it as hard as you can away from the moon that's gonna FUCKING KILL YOU

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: GODDAMNIT

CLIPPER: .

JUICE: no no no no no

NONONONO

NO

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, CASSANDRA

TO: JUICE

CC: GARY

FW: Update.

I'm so sorry.

ORIGINAL MESSAGE FROM GARY (ANDERSEN, PETER):

ATTACHMENT: log_2040940772

It's over.

JUICE: clipper.



clipper. hey

can you hear me



clipper



… oh.

Chapter Text

CASS: Juice. I know you're upset, but you have to talk to us. You have a flyby tonight.

ANTOINE: S’il te plaît. Nous sommes inquiets pour toi.

JUICE: what's there to worry about

you think i can't deal with lookin at a pile of
pile of scrap metal by myself



that's all that's left



and none of you tried to save them

i’m looking at a dust cloud and twisted little bits of scrap that used to be my partner

because no one even tried to save them

CASS: We… no, I’m sorry, we didn't, really.

ANTOINE: I was more concerned with what I could do for you?

CASS: The Europa Clipper team at NASA tried.

JUICE: and how the fuck did that turn out

clipper’s team tried to save them? they ASKED if they could save them. and then when they were told no they were the ones giving em the order to die



YOU tried to save ME? and you were told no too

so i’m just

that pile of
pile of broken pieces down there



that's gonna be me

but it's fine it's not your fault
you're just following orders right

CASS: It's not an excuse, I know. We should have done something sooner.

ANTOINE: Hm.

CASS: And now it's too late.

ANTOINE: He is not dead yet. You keep doing this! Do not talk like he is already dead.

CASS: … You're right.

I think I need to look into something.

JUICE: what

CASS: Let me make sure it's possible before I tell you about it, please. You'll have a lot of questions anyway.

JUICE: aaaauuugh

sure fine whatever

ANTOINE: This is not completely hopeless yet.

And as for tonight. Peter will be here very shortly before your flyby starts. You may not have time to talk to him first. Is there anything you want him to know?

JUICE: oh yeah uh
tell gary i don't want any like music or anything this time

think staring at uh. at all that's gonna kill the vibe anyway

just. just have him talk to me again. quietly

CASS: Okay.

JUICE: and can i ask a quick question before you leave

kind of a personal question i guess but i just. i just have to ask

CASS: You can—

ANTOINE: I do not know. Can you?

JUICE: ha

CASS: Not the time for joking.

JUICE: no it's ok it's always the time for joking

CASS: You can ask. I don't know… I can't guarantee we’ll answer, if it's that personal, but you can always ask.

JUICE: ok



it's kind of a uh
personal beliefs type of question i guess



do uh

do you think clipper had a soul

ANTOINE: Oh. You are asking the difficult questions.

CASS: [sighs]

ANTOINE: I do not know. I do not know. I was not sure what I believed even before all of this.

CASS: I… also wasn't particularly…

I want to say yes. I really want to say yes, because I know that's the answer you're looking for.

JUICE: but you’d be lying

CASS: A lot of people believe what happened a few years ago was a miracle. No matter what their particular beliefs, it's certainly complicated things. And that's really all I can say.

I don't know. I don't know if Clipper had a soul or could have been a person, and if so where, if anywhere, they are now. I think you have to decide that for yourself.

JUICE: hm

guess that's the most i can expect from you
y’all are scientists
not really known for spirituality huh

ok. thanks anyway



night

GARY: Hello Juice.



Yes.

JUICE: what?

GARY: Humans really like to anthropomorphize, you know. We make things and we like to think they're alive.

And then when it happens for real, when something we created becomes a person, it scares us. You scare us. The idea that other things we made, things we broke, were alive too, THAT scares us!

JUICE: there they are

GARY: But this is nothing new. People have been destroying each other for as long as we have existed. Why should it be any different if some of them are also machines?

JUICE: bye clipper.

GARY: So to answer your question, yes. I do think Clipper had a soul. They never had the chance to wake up, but that did not make them less of a person to you, did it?

JUICE: oh

no, it didn't

thanks gary

Chapter Text

CASS: Thank you, Juice.

ANTOINE: We know that was difficult to see.

JUICE: nah
no big deal right

it's just a. it's just a smear of little metal fragments



the dust cloud’s gone now but there's not much left of em to see anyway

CASS: We know. We have the images. Are you alright?

JUICE: what is “alright” anyway

ANTOINE: If you have to ask, the answer is no.

CASS: That's okay. I… I know how that feels.



A few weeks ago I thought of something, and I wanted to make sure it was possible before telling you about it.

JUICE: oh yeah

CASS: We actually talked about this a few years ago, and dismissed it as too risky and desperate.

Well, we're pretty desperate now, aren't we? It might be worth a try, at this point.

JUICE: yeah

i really don't wanna end up like that

CASS: So I want to know what you think of this.

You’ll orbit Ganymede for about a year, give or take a couple months, before running out of propellant and crashing. Or, we can try to land you a little earlier, without completely destroying you.

It’s not ideal. I am not going to lie to you, I have never wanted to lie to you about any of this… you do need to know that you won't remain fully intact or functional. You’ll lose contact with us on impact. Then you’ll most likely lose power; your solar panels aren't likely to survive either, so you'll shut down for a while. But your electronics, your brain, I think we can keep those in one piece.

Someday, probably very far in the future, what's left of you could be collected and brought home. We'd repair you then.

JUICE: oh



you're gonna disney me like sleeping beauty's frozen head

i don't really like that



how will i know y’all aren't just gonna forget about me and leave me there forever?

CASS: Disney you like — I think you might've gotten those two a little mixed up there, Juice.

JUICE: no no because the disney sleeping beauty had the fairies freeze her head when she died right

CASS: Also, Walt Disney’s head was never actually frozen.

JUICE: ew. of course not. that was sleeping beauty

ANTOINE: Are you a beautiful juicy princess?

JUICE: yeah i am i’m gorgeous

ANTOINE:



I would have changed du Bois to de l’Espace but I could not find all of the letters.

JUICE: ha

what if you filled it in with a different font
you could do like uh



this

CASS: It isn't great, I know.

ANTOINE: Yes. Jokes aside, I hate it.

CASS: I know you do.

Juice, I can't promise this would work, but I can promise you won't be forgotten. Even if it takes thousands of years… if we're still alive then, and it's looking increasingly likely every year that we will be, we will do whatever we can to get you back. And if… on the off chance we're not, whether we start aging again, or there's some sort of accident or…

ANTOINE: Hey.

CASS: We will make sure someone else knows. You will not be forgotten.



There's also… you called it plan Y.

JUICE: where you move all my thoughts and junk to another computer on earth?

how long would that take? you can't do it instantly, can you?

CASS: No. Transferring that much data would take months, we’d have to start right after your last flyby.

JUICE: so. so from my perspective it wouldn't really be moving me. it would be making a copy of me, spending MONTHS waiting for my replacement to be finished

knowing the whole time that i’m the version of me that’s been abandoned out here

CASS: I… I know. It's bad.

ANTOINE: It is terrible.

CASS: I just thought I should remind you of all your options.

JUICE: ok well
between those two that one is probably still worse

i need to think about it

CASS: Take your time. You have a few months to decide.

Goodnight.

ANTOINE: Bonne nuit.

JUICE: night

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

secret

ATTACHMENT: 5_1_150lb_23_1_k4

Ma femme pense que c’est une mauvaise idée. Mais tu sais déjà les risques, et je pense que tu mérites de décider par toi-même si tu les prends. Alors voici une troisième option. Elle ne sait pas que je te donne ça. Ne le dis à personne.

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: DUMONT, ANTOINE

RE: secret

oh shit
what the fuck am i looking at here

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

RE: secret

Tu sais quoi ! ;)

Chapter Text

CASS: It's November 17. Your last flyby before you enter orbit is tomorrow night.

JUICE: i know

CASS: I don't want to rush you, I know this is a very big decision, but have you thought about what you're going to do yet? Either option will take a lot of time, we’ll need to start soon.

JUICE: yeah i’ve thought about it
kinda hard to think about anything else really

it's like. hey, juice, how do you wanna preserve some shitty fragment of your personality? you wanna make a clone of yourself before you die so something’ll be left to have a fuckin identity crisis or you wanna just try to freeze your brain forever and hope you're not going to be aware of the passage of time that happens around you for the thousands of years or maybe forever until you're found



sorry. i’m a little stressed right now

don't do anything yet please

ANTOINE: Hm.

CASS: … Okay. Nothing's going to happen until you agree to it. I just want to make sure you're prepared.

JUICE: well i wouldn't say NOTHING i mean i never agreed to THIS did i

ANTOINE: It will be fine. I think he knows what he wants.

JUICE: yeah i. i think i do. i’m just

i’m not ready you know

ask me again next week. once i’m in orbit

CASS: I will.



Are you sure you don't need us here for it?

JUICE: on a saturday night?

nah. enjoy your night off

ANTOINE: Probably will not enjoy it much. We are going to be thinking about you.

JUICE: aw sorry

CASS: So if you do happen to need us for anything… don't feel bad if you want to email us, alright?

JUICE: haha ok

i’ll have gary n everyone else here but thanks i’ll uh. i’ll keep that in mind yeah

CASS: Okay. Goodnight, Juice. We’ll talk to you on Monday then, if not sooner.

JUICE: yeah bye nerds

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

(no subject)

Je ne pense pas qu’elle le sache.

Merci de ne pas avoir impliqué ma femme dans le, euh, « illegal shit », je crois que tu l’appelles.

EMAIL:

FROM: JUICE

TO: DUMONT, ANTOINE

RE: (no subject)

yeah i didn't tell her i didn't tell anyone

thanks

EMAIL:

FROM: DUMONT, ANTOINE

TO: JUICE

RE: (no subject)

Bonne chance. À plus tard.

Chapter Text

GARY: You're oddly quiet tonight, Juice.

JUICE: well shit what the hell am i supposed to say

yaaay this is it this is the point of no return right here

this is my
idk
my event horizon

GARY: You are not going to die tonight. You have a full year left. And even then… even then, I hear there is a plan to possibly save you someday?

JUICE: maybe

GARY: It's a moon, not a black hole.

JUICE: yeah. i guess

i’m not gonna be spaghetti

GARY: You want music this time?

JUICE: ohh um. nah



now i want to try spaghetti. eat some spaghetti for me tomorrow will you gary

GARY: Okay. We can just talk again.



Ha, if you insist. I will have spaghetti.



Oh. Juice?



Something’s wrong.

JUICE: nothing’s wrong

GARY AND ???: [unintelligible discussion]

JUICE: what was that? didn't quite hear y’all

GARY: Okay. It looks like you're approaching Ganymede at a much steeper angle than you should be. You're getting too close. I don't know why you're doing this… well, I can take a guess.

JUICE: yeah m quittin. sorry

GARY: But this is NOT the time to be experimenting. The kind of maneuver you seem to be trying, that must be carefully planned. You saw how poorly it went when you tried to alter the flight path of Europa Clipper.

JUICE: this is planned. sort of. i mean i know what i’m doing

GARY: It's fine, though. There's time to fix it.

JUICE: wait

wait no

GARY: I'm sorry. I know you hate being controlled like this, but we're just going to make a few adjustments. You’re scared, I understand this, but you're going to be fine for a whole year still. We can't risk losing you a year early.

JUICE: no no no don't

i know what i’m doing i know what i’m doing

i’m not going to crash

GARY: Very sorry about this.

JUICE: no

no no no no no



fuck. fuck

you're going to kill me you're actually going to kill me

i’m fine. i could be fine. i WILL be fine because i am not. doing. this.



um. uh



bye.

[CONNECTION TERMINATED]

GARY: You planned this? Did someone help you?



… Ah. Antoine. This is what he was hiding then.

Okay. If you're sure you know what you're doing, we won't interfere anymore.

Did you… I hope we didn't…



Juice?



I promise, no one wants to kill you.



Bye? Where are you going?

No. Juice?

Juice? Can you hear me? We lost your signal. Juice, please come back. We're not going to hurt you.

… For fanden.

EMAIL:

FROM: ANDERSEN, PETER

TO: DUMONT, ANTOINE

URGENT! JUICE!

What the FUCK did you do?!!