Chapter Text
Your lungs burn and your chest aches. Every breath you take is another painful gurgle of water, being inhaled through your nose and washing your throat out with an awful stinging sensation. You fight against the currents; all you can do is kick and throw your arms to try and save yourself from drowning. But your legs ache. It hurts to keep kicking, it feels like they’re getting slower and slower, and stiffer. You keep flailing your arms wildly. You pull up and up and up and UP. You sink. You finally give in and allow your limbs a break. You’re so tired… you feel so heavy. The light fades as the water swallows you until all that surrounds is black as night and cold. Is this it?
No. It can’t be.
Pomni gasps. Her eyes fling open and she hastily sits up in her bed. Another horrible dream… She lays her hands over her eyes and sighed. She drags her hands down and tugs on her lower eyelids, growling.
“Uuuurgh.” She rumbles out.
The dream was quickly fading, but the feeling of concrete in her lungs remained. Heaving her legs to dangle over the side of the bed, Pomni’s gaze sweeps from her bell-tipped clown shoes to her bedroom door. She anticipates the knock on her door from a concerned castmate, or the megaphone blare that was Caine’s wakeup call. She hopes it’d be the former; perhaps Ragatha would invite her out for a morning stroll, or Kinger would ask if she’d like to see his insects… again. The corner of her lips tugg up in a slight smile for a beat, but it didn’t last a second more. A rhythmic thud of knuckles rapped on her door and brought her out of her cloud of thoughts.
“Ohhh Pomni!” Cooed a familiar voice. “Why don’tcha come out and join us for a round of Go Fish? I heard Zooble say they really wanna see you lose.” A snicker followed. Which then was followed by a loud, frustrated groan.
“Would you ever shut up?!” Cried Zooble.
Jax... and Zooble. Pomni drug out a long exhale, her voice going rugged. It wasn’t like she could skip out anyway. She had a feeling she had no choice, like she’d be coerced one way or another. The want to stay in her room tugged at the back of her mind- the urge to lie back down and bedrot. To let the suffocating feeling fester and permeate. But Pomni knew better than that. Someone would come to check on her (heaven knows it’d be Ragatha) and prod at her until she got up.
“You can’t be a hermit anymore, Pomni…” She uttered to herself, words dripping with pessimism. She shook her head.
“Okay! I’m coming! I guess!” She shouted, a hand cupping beside her mouth to accentuate her volume. With a roll of her lidded eyes, she pushed off her polyester-smooth bed and planted her feet onto the rug. Bells jingle.
Pomni sluggishly saunters over to the door. Her hand hovers over to knob, hesitating to open it in fear of what may await her. A pie to the face? A bunch of bugs? (No offense Kinger.) Maybe some kind of cartoonish contraption? Or maybe just this once, answering the door to the circus-renowned mischief-manipulator would be normal. As normal as things can get here. Spiraling! She was spiraling again! Her eye would twitch. She finally grips and turns the doorknob, opening the door a crack- nothing out of the ordinary- and then fully swinging it open. There before her lie… nothing. She almost snorted at herself for getting so worked up over nothing. This place is driving me up the wall. She looks down both ways of the hall. Empty, so she assumes everyone’s already gone down to the main hub to play cards. She looks back over to her right and-
“WAH-AH!” Pomni yelped.
Against the right wall beside her door stood Jax, shiteating grin stretched ear to ear. He squints his eyes playfully, looking down at her with such a sense of superiority it makes her feel immeasurably small. Jax’s arms are crossed casually, and he nods his head to the right.
“Everyone’s in the lobby enjoying their downtime. What’s gotcha all huddled up in your room still, shortstack?” He snidely remarks.
Pomni wont give him the light of day. She gives him a not-so-subtle glare as she shuts her door and walks past him. He follows her, arms crossed behind his head smugly.
“What? I really am curious. Is your room really all that interesting to make you stay in there until roll call?” He clicks his tongue. “Really making me jealous, if your room’s really that nice, keeping it all to yourself. So selfish, Pomni.”
He feigns being offended, back of his palm to his forehead dramatically like a lady about to faint. Pomni stays quiet as he makes his comments. She didn’t bother speaking, she knew if she just ignored him he’d get bored. A dog doesn’t stay if it gets no attention. He really is a dog, she thought to herself. She hummed humorously to himself. Jax raises an eyebrow curiously, then rolls his eyes, huffs, and leaves without another word.
Jax made her blood boil. No, it made her blood curdle. Like spoiled, sour milk, left out to rot on a tile counter on a hot summer day in the middle of July. He made her eyes twitch, made her fists shake with rage. She was sure he had the same effect on the others. Oh, but compared to Caine? Pomni could almost double over right there in the hallway and laugh to herself. Jax, compared to Caine, was almost a godsend saint. At least he was human- at least Jax had feelings, or at least an understanding of the emotions and vitality of man. But Caine? Caine was an irrational god, no, a devil; sometimes Pomni wondered if this was her punishment in Hell for some wrongdoing in her life. Okay, maybe she was exaggerating. Caine had no malicious intent- at least she thought so. She doubts he was made like that. Caine’s purpose was to make the players happy, to send them on little adventures and such to keep them from going insane in their Digital Hellscape. Deep down, Pomni had to resign her resentment and admit that Caine was goodhearted and well intentioned (even if it didn’t seem like such.)
Pomni makes a stark halt at the end of the hall. She hadn’t even realized she’d reached the balcony overlooking the tent’s first floor. She must’ve been too busy spiraling. Again. She has to use her tippy-toes when she overlooks the balcony. She searches for a second, then she spots her castmates. They’re down at the lounge area, sitting around a plastic yellow coffee table, cards spread out as they play a game of Go Fish. Pomni sort of found it endearing, the way everyone was able to have some sense of humanity in this place. Some sense of normalcy, despite the harsh neons of their environment. Some sense of peace, despite the cartoony music echoing from somewhere way above.
A sigh escapes her. She should head down now and join them. But something is tugging at her. Something keeps her from making any move. She’s stuck, stationary, like a powered down robot. Her brows knit together frustratedly. Move. Move, damn you! But she just… can’t. It’s as if her feet are glued to the floor. A rat stuck to a gluetrap. She tries to lift her feet and they just feel numb, like sitting too long and they fall asleep and you can’t really lift them? It must just be her anxiety acting up again. She’d be a lot better off if she could stay medicated in this place. She snorts. Like Caine would allow that.
For a moment she debates whether or not to mention her anxiety to Caine. It probably wouldn’t be worth it, considering his lack of accommodations for anyone, and his lack of understanding of human emotions and human behaviors.. and humans in general. He may just pass it off as typical newbie jitters. He might not even know what being anxious even is. God, he really irks her. What a freak…
“Excuse me?” A voice boomed behind Pomni.
Startled, she jumped and yelped like a frightened chihuahua. She whipped around to meet the cause of her distress, only to shrink fearfully at the ringmaster before her. Had she said that last thing out loud?
“I sure do hope you’re not talking bad about one of your fellow cast members! That would be very impolite, Pomni!” Caine raised his cane, tapping Pomni on the head with the bulbous end of it. Thunk thunk. “I do say, why are you up here all alone? I trust you’re not up to anything, are you?” The chatter-tooth man questioned. His tone was like an overbearing professor.
Pomni grimaced at the headache-inducing throbs caused by the bops to her head from the cane. She makes a confused sound, and then shakes her head.
“N-No! No, I wasn’t! I was just… talking about what.. long of a week it’s been! Heh! What a week, am I right?” She improvised, shooting finger guns at Caine. Caine rubbed his bottom jaw like a chin, staring at Pomni questionably.
“Hmmm…” A pause. “My gosh, you’re right! It has been quite the week!” Caine parroted, raising his index pointedly. “You’re one smart cookie, Pomni! This week has been a rather long one hasn’t it? You know, I’ve been thinking about giving you all a most wonderful, dazzling, long-awaited treat as a reward for being so good recently. I mean, even Zooble’s tolerated one of my adventures!” Pomni looked at him timidly, index fingers tapping together patiently.
“So…” She began. “Is there like… an adventure planned for today?” She’d tug on the ends of her jester hat nervously. “Perhaps another normal one..?” She drew her question out.
Caine stared at her blanky, and she almost swore she could hear a dialup tone inside the AI’s head. Silence. Pomni waved a hand in front of him.
“Hello?”
"Apologies, my dear!” He spoke again.
Pomni sighed. At least he’s not broken.
“I was simply making adjustments to your next grandiose adventure!” He shooed her towards the stairs. “Now go on! Go and socialize while I finish the small details!”
Pomni gave Caine a questioning look. She was a little intrigued, sure, but more than that she was scared. What on earth could he be planning? What could possibly be so “grandiose” (in his words) that warrants him to break mid conversation? It had to be something big, for sure. Maybe an open-world map? Something like a sandbox? Yeah. A sandbox would be nice. She ponders over Caine’s implications as she hops down the stairs, bells jingling along the way.
___
“Got any... red square gloinks?” Ragatha asks, raising a brow at her selection of playing cards. A dissatisfied sigh sounds from her left, and a wobbly voice replies.
“Yeah.” Gangle says, handing over her red square gloink card. Ragatha shoots her an appreciative smile.
"Got any yellow star gloinks?” The raggedy doll asks again, this time aiming her question at Jax. The rabbit grins as he looks up from his deck.
“I dunno, do I?” He retorts cheekily. A collective groan arises from the group, some rolling their heads back, others shooting daggers in Jax’s direction. “What?” He asks all innocently, before slumping his shoulders. “Ugh, fine. No, go fish.” The game continues for a bit.
Then comes Pomni’s turn. She looks at her cards, harshly pressing her brows together in deep concentration. She took these sorts of games seriously, it was a competition to her. Sure, it was only a game, but she could prove something of herself. To be a winner meant to bask in the glory of having control, to bask in victory. She hunches over her cards to shield them from the others, lest relinquishing her deck to the others.
Pomni grins slyly. “Got any green... moon gloinks?” She asks, looking up and over at Zooble. Zooble grumbles, clasping a card between their claws and handing it over to Pomni. She snorts through her “nostrils” (or whatever was allowing her to breathe without a nose) and asks again, “Any red star gloinks?” as she looks to Kinger.
Kinger blinks absentmindedly. “Uhhh...” He paused to look at his hand. “The one that’s red and a star, right?” He says, holding out said card.
“Yes!” Pomni exclaims, taking said card and adding it to her deck. She slams her cards onto the table face-up. “Four of a kind, I win!” She pumps her fists in the air, shutting her eyes tightly. Ooooh it felt good to win. Her emote of victory earns her some snickers from the others. She quickly drops her arms to her sides and looks at the floor, her cheeks feeling hot from embarrassment. Ragatha covers her mouth to chuckle, looking to the jester endearingly.
“Hey, don’t be embarrassed! It’s nice to see you excited for once. Don’t let us bring down your glory.” Ragatha affirms, as Gangle and Zooble nod in agreement. Jax rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, clearly a sore loser. Kinger stares at Pomni with a glint of pride in his googly eyes like a proud father.
“Enjoy it while you can, Pomni. Looks like Caine finally finished whatever adventure he’s got planned for us today.” Zooble notes as them and the others turn around to look.
And here Caine comes, hovering down from somewhere above with Bubble in tow. The two seem to be whispering to each other- though not as quiet as they think they’re being –and making wary glances towards the 6 players. When Caine notices them all staring, heThey exchange whispers to each other- thinking they’re much quieter than they really are -and Caine cautiously glances at the group of six. He brings his fist to his jaws and clears his throat. Side-eyeing, he briskly shoos away Bubble.
“Good morning my frisky little sausages! I hope you’re all ready for another incredible, mind bending, adrenaline rushing, fun-tastic adventure!” Caine exclaimed. He lowers himself to eye-level with (most of) the cast, cane held in front of him with sincerity.
“Now I must say this as a fair warning, this adventure is only appropriate for ages SEVENTEEN AND UP! Thus rated M for Mature audiences only!” He began, a maturity rating popping up above him as he mentions it.
He points to it with the bulb of his cane, tapping the 3-Dimentional sign to accentuate it before it *pops* into confetti.
“Let me explain… you see, lately I feel as though I haven’t been catering enough to our older viewers! Now I can’t exactly access the outside world…” Before anyone can speak, the ringmaster continues. “But I can only assume the people want more! The spooky adventure I sent you all on not too long ago was only a trial run,” He wiggles his fingers. “But I really think I hit the jackpot with this one!”
“Are the censors gonna be turned off?” Jax was the first one to speak up. He had his hand raised.
“No!” Caine answered immediately. “However, I was kind enough to tinker with the strictness of it.” He winked. “Any other questions?” Zooble was the second to raise their hand, cocking their angular head to the side.
“Uh yeah, what even is this adventure gonna be about?” They asked, sounding a tinge inconvenienced. “Is this another one I can skip out on?”
“Why I’m glad you asked!” Caine’s glove hand extended down to pat the mix’n’match on the head. “Today’s adventure- or shall I say- the next few days’ adventure is called… THE INCREDIBLY MATURE POST-NUCLEAR FALLOUT FIASCO!” He announced, the adventure’s title popping up above him. “I’m sure I’ve piqued your interests. The next few days? Nuclear fallout? What kind of adventure is this?!” The last sentence was said in a goofy tone as his eyes bulged out from his jaws.
The six players exchanged apprehensive looks, unprepared for whatever hell Caine had waiting for them. Even Jax looked hesitant, which was a surprising new emotion he’d never really shown to the others before. Probably because of the mention of an extended adventure… Pomni thought.
“Wait, days? This adventure lasts for days?!” Zooble shouted. They threw their hands up into the air. “Fuck this, I’m not joining this one.” They turn, beginning to hobble back towards the cast’s dormitory hall.
“Ah-ah-ah! Not so fast!” Caine hollered, waving his cane in Zooble’s direction. Zooble was lassoed, like in an old-timey western, and dragged back over with the rest of the group. They groaned the whole way back, muttering curses under their breath.
“How.. how many days is this adventure gonna be?” Pomni implored, index finger held up with inquiry. “I don’t want to be stuck in another horrorgame…”
“Not to worry, my dear! This adventure won’t be too scary! And it’s only-“ Caine cut off. His body froze and his bulging eyes bluescreened.
Pomni’s heart dropped to her stomach, heavy like a stone. She could feel that heavy-chested drowning feeling in her lungs again, and the tightness in her chest. Strange, worrying heartburn. No. Anxiety. She fidgeted with her hands, noticeably shaking. Something just was not right. She almost jumped out of her socks when a soft hand rested on her shoulder. She turned her head to see.
Ragatha gave the jester a comforting smile and a squeeze of Pomni’s shoulder. She nodded, acknowledging her anxiety and saying wordlessly that it’s okay. Pomni eased a bit at this. She found solace in this doll, one of the very few comforting souls in this circus. At least she and Ragatha could stick together in this adventure. It’d be nice to catch up. They haven’t talked much at all since Pomni thanked Ragatha for always caring about her. Pomni placed a hand on top of Ragatha’s. It soothed her a little bit.
“-days! You will all be tasked with gathering survivors and taking down those nasty irradiated NPCs.” Caine finished. Since he glitched, nobody had an idea of how many days they’d be in the adventure. Just days. An undetermined amount of days. They’d probably be stuck there for a week. A month. Months. You’re spiraling again.
“Hey now, at least there’s a silver lining.” Jax interjects. “We get to take out our frustration on some mutated freaks! Surely there’s nothing wrong with that.” He nudges Gangle, who looks at him with bewilderment and whimpers.
“Let’s not procrastinate now!” Caine snaps his fingers, bowing to his players and guiding his arm towards the opening.
What lies through the portal is an obscured blur. A horrible apocalyptic mess just waiting to tear into the six circus members. Pomni felt the hand on her shoulder slip away, and she turned back to see Ragatha untying Zooble from their lasso restraints. Pomni’s brows knit back together worriedly. She didn’t want to go into this alone. She knew she wouldn’t be; everyone was going to be on this adventure. But heading through the portal alone scared her. Again, her feet felt glued to the checkered floor. She couldn’t budge, frozen in place and observing the others. That’s what she felt like right now- and observer. An outsider, looking in through a vibrant window. Jax is the first to walk towards the portal, unsurprisingly. He walks with his arms crossed and tucked behind his head, grinning ear to ear as per usual.
“Later losers. I’m getting a head start on this.” He called.
He swiveled on his foot and walked backwards through the portal, gone. Pomni was actually a bit relieved. She wouldn’t be pushed or shoved by Jax, or be the punching bag of his cruel jokes. And neither would the others. Looking back to them, Pomni lets a bittersweet smile slip onto her face. Ragatha notices, of course, exchanging a smile back. Zooble (now untied) gives a thumbs up, and Kinger and Gangle wave. Maybe this wont be so bad. It shouldn’t be. I have them to back me up! The five come to gather in front of the portal, with Kinger going in first. Then Gangle and Zooble, hand in hand- more like ribbon in claw. Ragatha turns to face Pomni.
“You want me to hold your hand? We can go in together.” The doll offers. “Of- of course, you don’t have to. I’m just suggesting!” Her plush hand is still outstretched, and Pomni wonders if she should take it. It felt… forced. Was Ragatha worried about this mission?
“No.. thanks. I- I think I’ll be fine.” Pomni answered. She swore she could see a twinge of disappointment on Ragatha’s face for a moment. Maybe she’s afraid. “I’ll go in when I’m ready.”
Ragatha, still smiling, nodded in understanding. “Alright. Don’t make us wait too long!” She playfully remarked, shooting finger guns at Pomni.
Pomni returned the finger guns gesture. Ragatha looked over her shoulder for a moment, like she was afraid Pomni would vanish. And just like that, she went right through. Pomni stood alone in front of the swirling, muddled portal. She could feels eyes on her. It made her shiver, made her nerves stand on end. She felt the hair raise on the back of her neck… or what felt like that. In the corner of her eye, she sees Caine staring her down. She can’t make out what he could possibly be thinking, or if he had any thoughts in that big tooth-head of his. Could an AI think? Was it like searching an algorithm? Was it like a prompt? She decided to stop thinking about it. It would only make her feel that existential dread she felt every time she thought too hard about life.
Pomni sharply inhales, instinctively holding her breath as she takes a step through the whirring portal of murk.