Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It all happened in a moment. 

He didn't want to sing anymore. After all, there wasn't anyone to hear his pleas and words of love. Nobody.

And the person who was still singing beside him, on the other side of the stage, seemed to still have the hope Till was sure he couldn't have anymore.

Till glanced at him for a second.

Ivan looked very distant from him.

However, that didn't stop their eyes from finding each other for a moment. In a blink, Ivan was already close enough to him that it felt somehow disturbing.

There wasn't any time to think about what was happening when he felt himself being pulled, his lips being pressed against Ivan's. In Till's mind, even a million words couldn't begin to describe what it all meant.

One would think that in such situation Till's head would be filled with thoughts about it, but surprisingly there was only one thought present: Their closeness felt really warm and really familiar.

He tried to put some distance, but Ivan didn't allow him to. It was a plea. One that said there wouldn't be a next time after that, and he wasn't wrong.

Suddenly, he felt the hands that were previously trying to comfort him around his neck.

It was the end.

There was a last, soft pressure on his lips.

Till closed his eyes. He was grateful that at the end his life was in the hands of a person he knew, and not at the aliens' mercy. He felt all his worries disappear, like he had found the rest he had been seeking for some time now.

But it didn't turn out like that.

He didn't even hear the gunshots. He had no idea. It was only after Ivan's hands started to slip from his neck that he noticed what the other had been planning, but it was too late.

As Ivan's body fell, Till could only look in surprise. He watched as Ivan bled on the floor, knowing his heart couldn't take any more losses.

Everything around them stopped. There was no sound or any signal, and the lights eventually went out.

He couldn't see anything, only remembering there was a heartbreaking scream in the back of his mind, not knowing he had been the one to let it out. After that, his consciousness slipped in a deep dream that he wasn't sure how far would go.

There was a really annoying and high-pitched sound in the distance. It was somehow different from the one he always heard in the morning.

He let out a small scream before he managed to open his eyes and push himself forward to sit on the bed. It took him a moment to get used to the light that seemed to be coming from some unknown source. When he did, he noticed that he didn't recognize the place he was, at all.

It looked like a very extravagant room, actually different from his own.

The sound he had heard before appeared again, this time alarming Till. He jumped out of bed and took a defensive stance, standing with his back against the door. However, the sound didn't stop.

“What the heck is that..?” He mumbled.

The sound continued, but nobody came over.

He decided to follow the sound. It grew louder as he approached the bed, so he removed the blankets and pillows. Underneath them he found a rectangular shaped device, and the sound was coming from it. The word "Alarm" was written in big letters.

He sat on the bed and grabbed the device, examining it.

It reminded him of some of the devices the aliens used to use, although they were bigger in size and out of reach for the humans. If he wasn't mistaken, it had to be some sort of communication device.

Again, the sound made him come back to reality, but this time Till turned it off by sliding on the screen. The screen revealed a wallpaper with a guitar, which looked kind of weird to Till, and the person who was holding it was.. himself?

How could that be possible?

He stood up quickly, noticing the mirror in the corner of the room. He walked closer to it, but closed his eyes before he could even see his reflection. What if he didn't like what he saw? He was afraid of seeing something on himself that would remind him of the recent round. He really couldn't think of that right now.

Slowly, he opened one of his eyes.He wished he could have been surprised, but he had gotten so close to the mirror without noticing, so he could only see his own eye. It was the same teal color he knew.

Without making haste, he opened both eyes and took a step back from the mirror, enough to completely see himself. He noticed that although his appearance remained, there was some weird feeling that he could very well be a stranger.

The clothes he was using were completely different from the ones he was used to. Although they were comfortable, they were far from being his style.

However, what relieved him the most was that he didn't seem to be in any kind of danger. He didn't hear any suspicious sound nor was someone restricting him with a collar, so he figured he must be somewhere safe for now.

He didn't know what had happened after the round, and he had a headache every time he tried to think about it. He was sure just a moment ago he had been standing on the stage, but now it looked unreal.

His eyes wandered around the room again, searching for something useful.

There were posters, objects, and even photos of people he didn't recognize. He couldn't even believe some of these things existed.

One of the photos stole his attention.

It was placed at the center of a photo collage that was stuck on the wall. And the people showed there were people he knew well.

A woman with pink hair, a woman with short hair, a man with black eyes, a short-looking man, two people who could very well be siblings because of their similar appearance, and of course, himself.

Out of those people, he only recognized four, but it was enough for him to remove the photo from its place and looking at it very carefully.

On the backside of the photo there was a phrase that read:

First day of filming! ALNST Project ♡

“Project? This can't get any weirder..”

He felt irritated. He didn't know where he was or why he had that photo, and he didn't like at all where this was going. Had he gotten out of that hell and gotten into another? Had he also died in that round?

Now he really wanted to investigate what was happening, for a little while at least.

He slowly opened the door and walked out in the same way. The next room was more spacious than the one he woke up in. It looked... like a normal house? That's what he wanted to think.

His nose caught a whiff of a really strong but delicious scent. He couldn't help but follow it, ending up in the kitchen, which was a little space divided from the rest of the room. Ignoring everything else, he noticed the scent came from a little machine with brown liquid inside.

It smelled incredibly good, and couldn't resist the urge to try it.

He searched every door and drawer until he found where the cups were hidden, picking up one of them to use. Being very careful, he poured the liquid on the cup. He realized it wasn't at the temperature where one could drink it, so he had to wait a bit.

He sighed. It was a little too quiet for his liking.

Some minutes passed until the coffee was at the right temperature to drink, and Till wanted to try it once and for all. Right now this task was what was keeping his mind occupied, not letting anything else on his mind attack him.

Unfortunately, before he could even have a sip, a loud bang coming from somewhere within the place scared Till, and that made him drop the cup just a little in front of his feet.

He still had the habit of not using shoes.

“Ugh!”

He took some steps back. Even though it wasn't as hot as before, it still managed to burn him slightly.

But leaving that aside, he wasn't going to wait around for something else to happen, so he quickly hid in the corner of the room.

The loud bangs, which were really someone knocking loudly on the front door, were heard again followed by a familiar voice.

“Till?! Are you okay?!”

He was losing his mind, right?

Of course, he was crazy already.

He was sure he had been drugged so much that everything he was seeing right now was but an illusion and that voice was some kind of torture because of his acts of rebellion.

Till grabbed at his head, unsure as if it was really happening or not. He couldn't even trust his judgment.

Nothing was real.

“Please stop...”

The banging on the door stopped, instead hearing how the door was being unlocked from the outside.

A moment later, which felt eternal, the door opened.

Till covered his mouth, grateful that the place he chose to hide in wasn't common or visible, at least not in plain sight. Whoever it was, alien or not, they wouldn't be able to find him if they were stupid enough.

“Till?”

It was that voice again.

Heck, he wanted to cry.

On the other side, at least he couldn't care less if he was drugged if he could continue to hear that voice one more time.

Chapter Text

That voice kept calling again and again, but Till couldn't even begin to gather the strength to stop hiding and confront it.

“Maybe.. he's not home? Oh, the director is going to worry at this rate.”

Till heard that. Who were they referring to? He just hoped that said director wasn't an alien.

The person didn't stop searching but decided to take a seat on the kitchen barstool. They took out their phone and dialed a number that was saved in the favorites tab.

It didn't take long until Till's phone started to ring from the bedroom, and that caught their attention.

“Is he still sleeping?” They were as confused as one could be.

They thought the loud knocking against the door would wake Till up if he was asleep, seeing that sometimes he almost arrives late to the set because of it. Even so, it happened so very few times that Till could barely be considered an irresponsible person.

They walked up to the room —the door being left slightly open— and much to their surprise, there wasn't anyone inside who would answer the phone.

Well, that was definitely worrying.

They hung up and walked back to sit on the barstool. They had no idea of where else Till could be. It wasn't like they knew him that well. Even when they were given the task of finding him midway to the set, they didn't feel particularly close, which saddened them in a way.

After all, both of their characters were so close to one another that they never took the time to consider themselves as close as that.

Till, who only had eyes for one person in his life, never realizing the sweet affection he thought came from that one person actually came from the one that was always by his side, Ivan.

Ivan, who never cared that the person he was most obsessed with in a way never "looked" his way if that meant he wouldn't suffer his loss, unknowingly loving the way Till loved.

Ivan let out a sigh at the thought.

“I hope both of you are happy in another life” he muttered.

He looked at his phone again, now making a call to the director. It took a while before someone picked up on the other end.

“Ivan? It's almost time to start recording. Did he actually overslept this time?” there was a femenine voice at the other end, youthful but determined.

“About that... I even entered his apartment, but he doesn't seem to be anywhere. His phone is here, so there's no other way to track him.”

“Well, it's true he has been acting a little out of it this past days, but I didn't think it would get to the point where he went and disappeared... Ah, could it be he didn't like that we planned a kiss scene?”

Ivan let out a soft laugh.

“He's too much of a professional, so I don't think that's it.”

He wasn't actually sure, but he wanted to think that Till didn't feel disgusted with the idea of them acting out a kiss for the next round.

They continued talking until they went back to their initial conversation.

“I'll see if I can send the others to help sea-”

Ivan didn't listen to what she was saying, as something on the floor caught his attention.

“Sorry Viv, talk to you later.” He hung up.

On the floor there were pieces of glass, evidently broken. It was stained with drops of coffee. The bar between the living room and the kitchen didn't allow the floor of said kitchen be seen in plain sight, so he hadn't taken notice of the disaster in there.

He stood up and walked towards the inside of the kitchen, finally noticing the broken cup and the spilled coffee. Even the scent was strong, but had thought that it was because of the coffee pot, which was still hot.

That should have been obvious. The whole reason he had "forcefully" entered Till's apartment was because he heard the sound of something breaking inside. He almost slapped himself for forgetting that one important detail.

However, the fact that there was such evidence meant that Till couldn't be very far.

“Or maybe he was kidnapped?”

The possibility was very small, but not zero.

In Till's case, he had managed to calm down a little now. He never imagined the small communication device would give him away.

It must have been an alien too.

There were so many thing he didn't understand, but was sure he wasn't prepared to confront Ivan already, even if he might be one of his hallucinations.

The "perfect place" Till managed to find and hide in was a corner of the room besides the fridge, which hid him out of sight. He was sitting with his knees up to his chest, even hugging himself. If he turned around now, he could very well see Ivan's back, and he didn't want that.

However, as if Ivan was reading his thoughts, he turned around slowly and managed to see him.

“What are you doing there?” His surprise wasn't shown on his voice, actually sounding like he was scolding him.

Till didn't turn around, hugging himself more tightly. Because he was looking away, his forehead was touching the wall, but he couldn't care less how cold it was.

“Till?” he called again.

He preferred to not approach him carelessly if Till needed some space. However he did manage to notice some things. Till was trembling slightly, his feet looked a little red —probably because of the spilled coffee—, and the way he was sitting and leaning against the wall wasn't normal.

It also worried him that Till was neither talking nor looking at him. Ivan wondered if something had happened for him to be that way, and so he crouched down where he was, not messing with the already stablished limits.

“Do you feel sick?” he asked, knowing there might not be an answer. “You don't have to look at me, but at least let me know if you're okay...”

“Get out.” Till's voice sounded cracked.

“Sorry..?”

Till hadn't actually wanted to say those words, but he couldn't help it. He really wanted to turn around and face him, see him, but he was afraid. He knew if he turned around one of two things would happen: he would hit him or hug him, and he wasn't sure with how much force he would realize either of them. Till pinched himself because of it.

On Ivan's side, everything was pretty much confusing. He didn't like at all how Till had said that, because he could notice there was something wrong but had no idea what it could be, and it was also obvious Till wouldn't say it. Even his tone of voice sounded suspicious.

“Uh...”

After getting that answer, Ivan didn't know what to do. If he stayed, it would probably irritate the person in front of him more, but if he left, he was neither sure of what Till would do being alone nor if it would be something good or bad, and didn't think it would be right to do so.

He decided to stay.

“Be right back” Ivan whispered.

He stood up and walked towards the front door, going out and closing the door behind him. Once there, he leaned against the door and took out his phone to make a call again. It ringed, and after a while the voice of the woman before answered on the other end.

“What happened? Did you find him?” She sounded worried.

“I did, but he doesn't look too well. I don't think he's in any condition to record today.” He tried to talk in a hushed tone, loud enough for the other person to hear him.

“Then are you with him? He shouldn't be alone if that's the case. You both should take today and tomorrow off, so is it possible for you to take care of him?” Although it was a shame to delay the recording, she couldn't force her actors to work like that.

“Well the thing is... I don't think he wants me to be here at all.” Ivan confessed with a soft, nervous smile.

“What? Did you make him mad or something?” The director was amazed, more so because she knew Till wasn't one to push people away like that.

“Nothing like that...”

The conversation continued for a while.

Inside the apartment, as soon as Till heard Ivan going out he turned around to where he had been standing. No one was there, and the place regained the quietness from when he first woke up. He let out a heavy sigh, which made him feel a lot better.

Even so, he didn't move for a while.

He was still trying to process everything that was happening. Whether it was real or just a product of his imagination, he couldn't know. Maybe right now he was unconscious inside a confinement cell like always, dreaming about this sweet reality before his death day.

He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking it wouldn't be so bad if that was the case. Maybe everything that had happened in the garden, just like the stage, was nothing but a dream. Even right now he wasn't sure which reality was the dream.

He opened his eyes again for who knows what time in his life, not wanting to think about that anymore, or anything else for that matter. 

Till got up from the floor and shook off some of the dust that got on him. He looked over to where he had spilled the coffee —now cold— that he had been so eager to try, although now it didn't look as appetizing. He figured he should at least try to clean up the giant mess he made thanks to Ivan. It was all his fault.

Yeah, Till wasn't afraid of cursing at the dead.

“Stupid. Stupid Urak, stupid Garden, stupid aliens, stupid dream... Especially this dream! All of this is stupid... Stupid Ivan, why did you have to go and die like that?!”

He couldn't even distinguish if there was genuine anger or sadness on his voice. Although his eyes felt strange because of his feelings, there wasn't any tear in sight.

Till had been so immersed in his thoughts that he wasn't focusing on his task at hand, until he noticed he had grabbed a piece of glass by the wrong side because of the sharp pain he was now feeling.

It wasn't much compared to everything else he usually had to bear with, so he couldn't care less.

Although there was someone who took notice of that.

Till didn't hear the front door open or close, so he hadn't noticed that on the other side of the bar that divided the kitchen and the living room was Ivan.

From his expression, it was obvious he had heard and seen what Till had said and done. He really wasn't keeping track of how many times he had found himself confused in a single day.

He hadn't wanted to interrupt him, but now it seemed necessary.

“Till, can we talk?”

As soon as he heard Ivan's voice, Till's eyes couldn't help but glance his way.

Finally, as if by a spell, Till's eyes could shed the tears he had tried so hard to keep deep inside.

Chapter Text

Ivan froze as he saw that. In the two years he had been working with Till, he had never seen him cry as much as he was doing now. At least, not off the set.

Till, on the other side, had so many mixed feelings.

The person right in front of him, Till couldn't say it wasn't Ivan. Of course, he looked somewhat different because of his clothing and expressions on his face, but everything else was just a carbon copy of him.

He could care less if it was an alien pretending to be him.

Till let the broken pieces of glass fall again, not taking his eyes off of Ivan for a second as if he was examining him. He couldn't stop his tears, which made him feel pathetic.

"Till, what's wrong?"

The look Till was giving him was something Ivan had only seen when they were recording, so he was weirdly familiarized with what it could mean, at least on the ALNST project context.

He walked around the kitchen bar that separated them and walked slowly towards him. However, he had to stop once he realized Till didn't have any intention of letting him go near.

It felt as if he was dealing with a surly cat.

It was a funny thought, but couldn't actually laugh in this situation.

"Who are you?" Till's voice was cautious, as if trying to not anger him.

"Me?" Ivan was weirded out by the question, but answered anyway. "I'm Ivan. Don't you remember me?"

With that, he noticed Till didn't look convinced.

"I know we're not that close outside of the set, but I'm also not someone without a presence in your memories... Right?"

Till's lips moved, mumbling something. Ivan tried to get closer just to hear better, but that only made Till take another step back, stepping on some of the broken glass. That really worried Ivan.

Because of the situation, Till was more focused in the person he had in front of him rather than the physical pain he was feeling.

"Hey!" Ivan couldn't keep watching Till hurting himself just to avoid him.

He walked rapidly towards him, grabbing him by his arms so he would stop moving back. However, that didn't stop Till's struggling to break free. The strength was such that Ivan wasn't sure he would be able to keep him in place.

"Let me go! You're not Ivan!" He couldn't control his emotion right now.

He couldn't even believe that any thing in front of him was real.

"What are you talking about?!" Ivan had to tell because he didn't think Till would hear him otherwise.

"You're not real. You're not Ivan! How can you be when I just saw him d-?!" He couldn't even finish his sentence, a muffled sob being heard instead.

What he was saying didn't make any sense. At least for Ivan, it seemed that Till had had a very realistic dream and was now mixing up his character with himself.

That thought distracted him, which allowed Till to free one of his arms. Without thinking twice, he punched Ivan on the head.

Ivan stumbled to the side, grabbing his head and leaning against the kitchen counter. He couldn't believe Till had that much strength, but above all he couldn't believe he had been hit by someone who had always been kind to him.

Till stayed still, in part worried and in part relieved that Ivan wasn't invading his personal space anymore. However he also felt that he shouldn't stay there for much longer.

"I didn't think you'd do that.." That whisper reached Till's ears.

He walked out of the kitchen without looking back. He didn't have to look at someone who was probably tricking him. It wasn't real.

The apartment wasn't very big, just enough for a single person, and Till had no idea that one of those doors lead to the outside world. In fact, he didn't want to search nor find that door, out of fear for what he could find.

As for what was happening with Ivan, he almost felt as if his head had been split in two. The blow had caused him to hear a high-pitched sound and it took him a while to understand what was happening.

He noticed how Till was trying to find a place to hide, but didn't have many options to begin with. Ivan shook his head, finally recovering from the shock. Without making a sound, he walked into Till's bedroom and took the blanket on the bed. It was somehow heavy, so it was perfect.

Well, if Till didn't want to do this the right way, he'd do it the bad way.

Although that probably wasn't the best way to approach someone who wasn't mentally stable at the moment.

He didn't waste time in getting closer. He walked behind Till to avoid being seen.

Till was immersed in his thoughts when he felt himself being wrapped around by someone, or something. He tried to fight back again, but Ivan didn't give him any opportunity thanks to the blanket.

He wrapped him with it in such a way that the only visible part was his head.

"Sorry if it bothers you a little, I just don't want you to hit me again." There was a nervous smile on Ivan's face.

"You don't deserve to talk or look at me with that face. Let me go!"

For some reason, Ivan felt a little sad to hear those words, so he sighed.

"Did I do something wrong for you to have such a bad reaction about me?"

"... You're not real. Don't talk to me."

"Till."

"Don't talk to me! You're not real! What right do you have after dying, you idiot?!"

"Till!"

It was stressful. His voice was the same, his face was the same, even the warmth that managed to seep through the blanket was something he could recognize, even if he denied it.

"Why didn't you let me die instead?" It was a very quiet plea mixed with a sob.

Even if he wanted to believe any of it was real, he was scared by the idea of waking up and nothing being there. Ivan would still be bleeding on the floor and Till would continue watching, without being able to do anything.

After hearing that, Ivan stopped trying to reason with him. Whatever was going on inside his mind, were it true or not, worried him. More so because they hadn't even begun to record round six, but Till acted like it had happened already.

As if he had been personally there.

He carried him carefully and made him sit on one of the couches. Right now he didn't seem to have the same strength he had before to try to escape.

He quickly returned to the kitchen, searching every door and drawer for a first aid kit.

Instead of that, he only managed to find a hidden drawer with cotton balls, gauze, bandages and alcohol, among other things he didn't need. It was messy, but it was something.

He brought those things over to where Till was, who was now closing his eyes, probably to avoid seeing him.

Although he couldn't understand his actions, he wanted to help him, just like how Till always helped him back.

He bent down and carefully uncovered his feet, noticing that there were a few pieces stuck to them. Having walked over the glass managed to cut some parts, although most weren't that deep. But it was a disaster, so how had he managed to walk like that?

He removed the pieces on both feet, getting a small reaction out of Till because of the pain. He put some alcohol on one of the cotton balls and carefully started cleaning the wounds.

For Till, it was anything but pleasant. The wounds stung every time that liquid touched them, and he really wanted to kick Ivan on the face once and for all. Unfortunately, Ivan was grabbing his foot with enough force to not be able to move it even an inch. It was obvious he now knew what Till was capable of.

Till gave up, opening his eyes slowly.

The image of Ivan cleaning his wounds was something he never expected to see, at least in the way he was doing right now.

The way he was used to was always a brusque one. Even when they were in Anakt Garden, not only did Ivan look at him like he was making fun of him, but also directly touched his wounds and cuts without any care.

He always saw it as something Ivan did just to mess with him and show that he didn't have to go through that. How annoying.

But the Ivan in front of him, that didn't seem all that different, was different. And Till didn't know why he had to be so different in that dang dream.

The heck, he was having mixed feelings and it grossed him out.

After all, it was so much easier to say he hated him than saying there was something special about him.

"You don't have to look so opposed at me taking care of you." The voice stopped his running thoughts.

Till looked away from him.

Ivan finished bandaging his feet, making sure they were tight enough to not come undone.

Once that was done, he stood up and walked towards the kitchen. He put back what he had borrowed, throwing out whatever had been used and dirty.

Looking at the coffee pot, he decided to pour some into another cup. He brought the cup over to where Till was, sitting beside him.

"You were about to drink coffee before I barged in, right?" He tried to start a conversation.

"Leave me alone." Which didn't work.

He had wanted to give him the cup he had brought but it didn't seem possible now, so he changed topics.

"The director said I have to take care of you for the next two days, so let's get along, Till."

"Shut up."

Till actually wanted to slap himself for being so rude to this sweet version of Ivan in his dreams, but the blanket stopped him.

Also, he didn't even know who he was talking about.

"I see. I guess I must've done something really bad for you to treat me like this." He had a sad smile on his face, not intending to make Till feel guilty.

But he did, that's why Till had to look the other way.

"You... Why did you have to do that?" He mumbled.

The question took Ivan by surprise, not knowing what he was talking about.

"Sorry? Do what?" He left the cup on top of a small table near the couch to give Till all of his attention.

"That."

"I don't think I understand... That?"

“Yes, that!"

They said "that", but only Till knew what it was about, even if he didn't have any specific name for it.

"I don't-"

Ivan was interrupted.

Till had managed to free himself from the blanket, but instead of trying to hit him again he trapped Ivan against the couch back and pushed their lips together, softly. One of his hands even made its way behind Ivan's head, imitating what had happened previously in that round.

Great way to make Ivan stay silent.

But it didn't last long, as Ivan pushed him off, stopping him. That made Till end up sitting on his lap.

That was really wrong.

"You're confused, we... we've never kissed. We haven't even done it in scene." Ivan covered his mouth, saying that last bit in a whisper.

Kiss.

Was that the word that defined the act?

He felt there was something else behind that act, and was so scared of asking what exactly had he wanted to convey through it.

However, his thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone knocking on the front door.

Chapter Text

There wasn't a faster movement than Till getting up from the couch and Ivan pulling him down almost immediately to make him sit down again. Obviously not on his lap, but besides him where Till had abandoned the blanket.

The reason being that Ivan didn't want for Till's wounds to open again, even if they were small.

“I'll go see who it is.”

Before he stood up, Ivan made sure to cover Till with the blanket. Not like he had done before. Just covering behind his head, shoulders and everything else. It had been a very strange thing for Till.

He saw Ivan going towards one of the many doors in that place after doing that. It was one that was hidden in a small hallway, one he didn't dare to go into.

He felt relieved, and at the same time disappointed. He didn't know why.

Never in all his life had he doubted what kind of relationship they both had. Whatever happened, he had always liked being able to be himself around Ivan, and the other being more than a "pretty face" around Till.

But it was obvious this Ivan had no idea about any of that.

He didn't know of the times they fought, of the times they laughed, of the quiet times, of the times they talked, when they sang together, or how their friendship started.

He had none of those memories.

The Ivan he knew didn't exist anymore. He was gone.

He couldn't help trying to hide himself with the blanket. He wanted to disappear just like that idiot had done, and go after him. He was sure if he ever saw him again he would hit him a lot harder than he had hit this Ivan.

But thinking about it a little, he couldn't even hate the Ivan he had in front of him.

Those memories were only bringing him pain and misery, so it was for the best that this cute version of Ivan didn't have any of those memories.

He could keep pretending until one day his own feelings about him died. That's what he had been doing all this time.

“Till!” There was a very happy tone in Ivan's voice.

Till decided he would keep playing this game until he was forced to abandon it.

“Look who came to visit you.”

Behind Ivan appeared a man with blonde hair. His expression remained the same even in this reality. He looked uninterested at first, but there was a soft smile as soon as he saw Till.

“It's good to see that you're doing well.”

“... What are you doing here?”

Out of everyone, it had to be his next opponent.

Till glared at him. Even his tone of voice was hostile.

Luka was the one responsible for Mizi's disappearance, or at least that's how he saw it. Even if he wasn't responsible, he had many reasons to not quite like him.

Luka, however, was a little taken aback by the sudden tone in Till's question. Of course, they weren't close to each other, but they weren't complete strangers to each other. They got along well enough for Luka to feel free to come visit.

“Sorry if my visit was a little sudden. I messaged you but you didn't seem to answer.”

That made Till realize those messages probably were on the communication device he didn't want to use at the moment, so he couldn't care less where it was or what he was missing out on.

“...” Till only stared at him.

Luka turned to face Ivan, who seemed to be somehow nervous thanks to Till's reactions, and gently pulled on his sleeve to get his attention.

Ivan looked at him right away, changing his expression and putting on a small smile.

“At least he's only watching you and not trying to land a hit on you,” he whispered.

“He hit you?” Luka whispered back to him.

That small conversation didn't go unnoticed by Till.

They looked close. Like really close.

Actually, Till had never felt as jealous as he was feeling right now, and he also didn't know that was what he was feeling right now.

His Ivan had never been that close with someone who wasn't Till, but this Ivan seemed to have a lot more people around than he expected. He didn't like that.

He interrupted their conversation by making a loud "Ahem!" sound. They both looked his way, but only Ivan ran over to check on him.

“Is something wrong? Are you cold? Are you feeling sick?”

Ivan hadn't even noticed that Till started a weird game where there was only one player, it being him, and he was determined to win it.

Seeing that Ivan looked worried about him, he smiled softly.

“Can you bring me a glass of water?” His voice was soft, almost a whisper.

Ivan nodded and quickly made his way to the kitchen. Now there were only Luka and Till in the living room.

Luka never felt as if they didn't get along, much less when they were just about to start recording the sixth round and then soon enough the final round, but he could see it.

In Till's face there was a small triumphant smile.

Luka understood that. He also understood that there was definitely something strange with him but he couldn't quite pinpoint it.

With that, Ivan came back from the kitchen with the glass of water. He handed it over to Till, who had to hide the smile he had previously. He only took a small sip and put it aside.

Till was, at this point, firmly convinced that everything that was happening right now was either a dream or a hallucination. He couldn't let his guard down if by chance any alien decided to pull him out of his bubble, but he also couldn't be on guard all the time with this innocent looking people.

“Sorry if I'm being a bother. I'll leave now...”

“Eh?” Ivan looked like he didn't want him to go.

Ivan and Luka were the ones that got along the best in the set, even when they didn't call each other anything like best friends or buddies.

They met each other while working in the same agency and eventually debuting as idols in the same unit, even if that didn't last long and now became simple actors.

Of course, due to that closeness, they went to many places together. It was mostly Ivan dragging Luka around to all kinds of places. Although this time it was different. Ivan hadn't asked him to come over at all, but Luka decided to go visit Till after the director told him what she had talked with Ivan on the phone. That was why Ivan seemed so impressed and happy knowing Luka had taken the time to come visit.

In any case, even if he did it in part for Ivan, he also did it for Till. He didn't want the actor to feel lonely even though Ivan was with him, but now it seemed like there was no way Till was feeling even a bit lonely with that look he just gave him.

“Don't worry, you're only taking today and tomorrow off. We'll see each other at the set soon.” Luka gave a smile to Ivan.

Contrary to his character, Luka genuinely appreciated his friends. He also knew when he was not welcome, and right now that's what Till made him think.

“Wait.”

When Luka was about to go, Till's voice made him stop. He thought he'd get told to screw off or something, but his tone changed and now he sounded a little confused.

“What set are you talking about?”

It was the first time Till actually paid attention to what was being said by them, which was why he had only just noticed they had been using terms like set, recording, scene, project, and the sort.

Don't misunderstand him. Even he knew that humans were just a form of entertainment for the aliens, but he couldn't remember having participated on something other than Alien Stage. He wasn't sure he'd get out alive to even try.

Even when Urak loved to show him off just to humiliate him later.

He really hoped to not have him appear anywhere.

But going back to the situation.

Luka looked at Ivan again, who had to now explain to the best of his knowledge what was going on, even if he was lost himself.

“Well, apparently Till is convinced that I'm not Ivan, and is probably also comparing you to your character. He's been like that since I got here. I have no idea what happened before that or the reason for it at all,” he explained slowly.

He had such a good eye. Even if Till wasn't mistaking Luka for his character, there was an evident rejection towards him.

Hearing that, Luka turned to look back at Till, who seemed annoyed. Although being wrapped on the blanket made him look less menacing.

“Till, can I ask you something?”

“No.”

“Which was your lastest round?” Luka decided to ignore Till's answer and asked anyway.

“... Round six,” he whispered, but both heard it well.

“Round six? ...” Ivan was visibly confused.

They had gotten the script months before, so it was totally normal that both Till and Ivan knew what was going to happen, but Till talked as if everything had already been said and done.

And not as a simple performance, but as if he had been there himself, and that was the most confusing thing for the other two.

Only someone who had been there would so accurately portray the feelings of their character, just like he was doing now.

“What about it? Are you trying to question me so you can find a way to get into my head and make me lose the next round? I don't care if you're an alien or not, get lost.” Till showed him his middle finger, as he usually did with others.

But upon seeing that, Ivan quickly grabbed his hand with both of his and made him stop. He didn't want to see Luka getting angry.

Although it was a little late, as that gesture had managed to make the usually calm Luka smile with annoyance.

“So you're firmly convinced that you're actually your character, Till?”

“Luka—” Ivan was interrupted by Till.

“I don't know what the heck are you talking about, so you better get out of my sight if you want to keep that pretty doll face of yours in the next round.”

“Even if you end up losing your life for that?”

“I've already lost everything, what else do I have?”

The mood around them turned so cold that Ivan could feel a chill running down his back. He placed himself between them, even if he was afraid of being hurt in the process.

“Okay, that's enough. Nobody is hitting anyone and nobody is dying,” he sighed. “Till, I know you're a professional, but even this is too much for you. Let you character rest.”

“Shut it! I'm not playing around!” Till stood up, being directly in front of Ivan. “If you want to defend him so much then I don't need you here at all.”

For some reason, again, he said things he didn't intend to say. But he couldn't take them back now.

“Till—” Ivan was interrupted a second time.

“I thought that in my dreams you'd at least keep choosing me, but I see the aliens don't know you as well as I do. Just leave. There's no difference in you being alive or not.”

Till didn't even bother in taking the blanket on the couch with him as he walked quickly to his room, closing his door loudly.

He didn't know that those words had left Ivan on the brick of crying, and with Luka trying to comfort him in any way he could.

Chapter Text

Many hours passed by.

Till hadn't come out of his bedroom. Instead, he was sitting on the floor by the bed and hugging his legs. He couldn't find a reason to go out and deal with the mess he had made, and honestly didn't even know if Ivan had decided to stay after all that.

Probably not. Who'd stay after hearing such words from someone else? Till didn't think he himself would.

He was starting to feel a little hungry, and there was no sign of any alien coming to bring him food. He didn't even know if there was food to begin with.

He didn't want to go out, but also didn't want to die of hunger.

While he was having that dilemma in his head, there was a delicious smell that seeped through the door. That made him stop and put his full attention on it.

“Freaking dream...”

He stood up from where he was and walked closer to the door.

Till didn't have an apology ready in case Ivan had stayed, and didn't know how to look at him in the face after all. Everything was different and he didn't know how to react.

There was some light knocking on the door and a voice he recognized perfectly.

“Till, the food is ready. I know you must be hungry and won't come out because of me, so I'll leave for today so you can rest well...” The words were almost a whisper, but still could be heard through the door.

Ivan didn't want Till to feel more uncomfortable around him, although it was obvious something was going on. It was the first time something like that had happened and wasn't sure if it had been something Till had meant wholeheartedly or not. He didn't want to find out.

Luka had left a few hours ago, at least after Ivan had stopped crying like before. He had been glad Luka had been there with him at that moment, or else he wouldn't have known what to do.

Ivan had walked towards the front door and even opened it, but a hand stopped it and closed it back. That scared Ivan, as he hadn't heard any footsteps behind him. Slowly, he turned his body to find Till standing there, although he could only see his hair because he was looking down.

He didn't expect it. Actually, he would've expected more being hit again if the other chased after him like that.

Ivan heard a faint mumble coming from Till, but couldn't quite tell what he was actually saying. It was short, but seemed important.

“Sorry?...” His voice wasn't louder than a whisper.

He heard the faint mumble again, although now it seemed he was saying it through his teeth.

“Till.. I can't hear you.”

With that, Till grabbed him by the arm to capture his full attention and looked up at Ivan. His eyes reflected the hard time he was having saying those words, even if that shouldn't have been the case.

“I said please forgive me. I'm sorry. Please... Don't leave.” This time the mumble was heard.

Actually, he had added that last part. He couldn't just apologize and let Ivan leave. He was certainly afraid that he wouldn't be able to meet him again, even if it wasn't real.

“Till, you didn't do anything wrong. It's my fault—”

“Idiot! How could it be your fault? I'm the one who said all those hurtful things. Do you deserve to hear them? Why are you so keen on keeping me safe even here?”

Ivan sighed.

It seemed like Till's words could only be understood by Till. As if only some few words were directed at Ivan but the rest were directed at himself. Some he could understand, but some he had a hard time figuring out.

Maybe Luka was right and Till was firmly convinced that he was his character.

It was a possibility he didn't want to be true.

Till's character had gone through so much. It was painful from and outsider's point of view, so it must be even more for the actual person who lived it, even if there was no way Till had done so. There also wasn't any reason for Till to pretend or fake it. That was what worried him the most.

“Maybe because you are a person I want to be closer to. Someone you can see eye to eye.” Ivan took with his hands the hand Till was using to hold his arm.

As opposed to Ivan's character, he didn't feel any romantic attraction towards Till. It was more like he admired him for his personality and professionalism. Even so, he could understand why his character was so mesmerized by Till's character.

“I'm not sure what's happening here or what I should do for you, so please tell me. What can I do to make it all better?” Ivan smiled.

And of course, that smile made Till remember something he didn't want to.

Those eyes as black as the night sky that fell into a puddle of his own blood. The tears that mixed in with the soft rain of the stage, and the last smile before it all ended. 

The melody echoed in his head. A constant reminder of what was real.

But instead of getting away from Ivan, this time he pulled him closer against him in a hug. Or more like, Till threw himself against him and almost made them fall against the door if Ivan hadn't managed to steady himself.

“Till?” That took him by surprise.

Till was clinging to him tightly, hiding his face in Ivan's shoulder. Ivan didn't know what expression Till had on, but he could tell by his actions that it wasn't a peaceful one.

“It's too late,” Till let out as a whispered.

Upon hearing that, Ivan also surrounded him with his arms, hugging him back, and giving him light pats. There wasn't a lot more he could do but be there for him.

The director had made a good choice by asking Ivan to take care of Till. He didn't think someone else could take care of him like he was doing now, although he was unknowingly the one who was making Till react in such a way.

After what seemed like several minutes passed, there was a sound that forced them to return to reality.

Ivan let out a soft laugh, knowing that the sound had come from Till's stomach. He must've been starving, for lack of a better expression.

“Do you want to eat now?” Ivan asked, to which Till nodded.

They took a step back from each other and walked to the kitchen.

Ivan made Till sit on a barstool while he walked around the kitchen bar to serve him what he had cooked.

“It's not the best I've done, but I hope you like it.”

The served a plate and placed it in front of him. It was still warm, and the steam from it could be seen. Even the smell was the same that almost made him come out of his room.

With spoon that was on the plate he grabbed a little and brought it up to his mouth, however he couldn't even complete this action when he felt someone staring heavily at him.

He lowered the spoon and looked at Ivan reluctantly.

“What?”

“Till, you gotta say 'thank you for the food'.” It was like a soft advice instead of a scolding.

“Thank you.. for the food?” He was somewhat confused.

Was that something the did in that reality? Although he really was grateful to Ivan for the food, it wasn't something he was used to doing. At least he felt that it was the first time such word came out of his mouth.

The food the aliens gave them wasn't so good that he felt the need to thank them for it.

Then finally, he could try the food in front of him. It was really delicious, even when Ivan said it wouldn't be. Was there something better than that? He was fascinated with the idea to find out.

After he finished, he made Ivan serve him some more. It wasn't something he tasted everyday.

Surely Urak would hit him if he found out about it, but nobody was going to tell him now.

“I... I still have to apologize properly,” he said as he pushed aside the plate. “There's so much happening. First this place and the strange things in it, then that annoying blonde "prince"... Everything seems like a dream.” He didn't think he was expressing himself correctly upon seeing Ivan's confused face. “What I mean is.. you don't have to take the things I say to heart. All those words will disappear when I wake up anyway.” Then, he added with a whisper, “just like you.”

There was a very uncomfortable silence for Till, but that gave Ivan time to think about what he should say to him.

It was a genuine apology, although it also seemed like Till stopped trying to understand what was even happening.

It mattered not what Till thought was real or not, Ivan just wanted for Till to stop feeling sorrowful for it. He wanted to see him smile as he used to do, now more than ever.

“It's alright. How could I blame you if you make that kind of face?” Ivan laughed softly.

Till was facing down, clearly sorry with how difficult it was to express his words. He was shy by nature, but right now he didn't know how should he act with the one in front of him.

Ivan had tried, but it was obvious Till didn't want to say anything more to him. He had a vague idea, but it seemed more unreal than possible.

Maybe he could asked the director more about his character. Now he could see that the way he was acting was actually affecting how Till reacted to him, complicating it a little.

“Also, you can treat me as you feel more comfortable. I assure you I'm the same Ivan you know, maybe even better.” He winked. “Just don't hit me. You have a lot of strength...”

Just remembering about it made him feel some pain where he was hit, although it seemed like there wasn't a visible mark if even Luka hadn't noticed it.

Till extended his hand towards him, to which Ivan leaned back slightly, just noticing that Till wasn't trying to hit him again. Till's hand was touching the place on his head where he had been hit, feeling the warmth seeping through it.

For some reason, that comforted Till.

And for some even stranger reason, that made Ivan's face blush, bowing his head to hide it.

Chapter Text

Night had fallen a while ago, and Till's gaze was now fixed on the large screen in front of the sofa, which he had only noticed until now.

The contents on the screen, which Ivan had referred to as a television, was varied and strange, but he couldn't say he didn't like it.

“It's late.”

As soon as he heard that, the TV went off. Till turned to look at Ivan, who was holding the remote control.

Sure, it was late, but Till wasn't sleepy. In fact, when he woke up, he felt strangely rested, which wasn't normal for him.

“I'm not sleepy.”

“Your dark circles will be more noticeable if you don't sleep, you know? I know they add a touch to your character, but it's also important to rest.”

Especially since once filming starts, both of them will have such a busy day that they will want to sleep and won't be able to.

“Still, I'm telling you, I can't sleep if I'm not sleepy. I'll probably start writing a song or something,” he said, a little tired of having to explain it.

Ivan looked at him somewhat worried, and Till did nothing but turn away.

“I can try, at least,” he murmured.

“That would be great.” Ivan gave him a genuine smile.

He really couldn't handle this Ivan.

He could compare the two and find similarities, like their appearance, way of speaking, and smile, but their personalities were completely different. He was more expressive and clear with his words, something he would have liked to see in the Ivan he knew.

He wondered if he had at least returned to the Great Anakt, as many had wished.

Ivan stared at him, as he made no effort to get up and go to bed. He could tell he was thinking about something, and whatever it was was making him make a worrying expression.

One of his eyebrows was furrowed, and there were a few drops of sweat. Even his gaze was fixed on the floor.

Ivan opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a faint sigh and what Till said next.

“I don't want this to end just yet.”

There he went again, thinking it was all a dream.

“Till, I assure you that when you open your eyes again tomorrow everything will be the same as now.”

Ivan approached and placed a hand on his shoulder, a little afraid to say the least. He didn't know if he was invading his personal space with that, and he didn't want him to react the way he had before.

“And if it does? How can you be so sure?” Till turned to look at him. “I know you think I'm just talking nonsense, but please believe me when I tell you it was all real.”

Somehow, the fear of it all ending was making him confide what he'd experienced to the Ivan in front of him. As if he should leave some evidence that he'd been there.

Ivan knelt in front of Till and held his hand, which was trembling slightly without him knowing. Whatever he wanted to tell her, he'd listen. That's what his eyes said.

“I wish I had been willing to abandon everything and follow you under that crimson sky,” he said it in such a low tone that Ivan could barely hear it, but it gave him a way for responding.

“I'm not going to tell you to think that what happened was a dream, because that would be cruel. So, consider this the opportunity you missed that day. This time we're free. We did it, Till.”

Hearing that, Till's eyes lit up, which surprised Ivan in a different way this time.

Ivan knew about that scene from the script, and he knew what it meant from the context the director gave him when they filmed round 3. 

It had been a very important point in time that neither of them could get over, but what Ivan said about it comforted him. It made him think that even if he woke up from the dream, there must be another life where everyone was safe and happy, like here.

“Thank you.”

Till smiled for the first time since waking up. Ivan couldn't help but stare at him.

“Now you really need to  go to sleep. It's already one in the morning,” Ivan sighed.

They had continued talking for a while after that, and now Ivan understood a little more of what was going through Till's head at the moment.

He also understood that being the first person Till saw when he woke up was probably the most surreal experience he'd ever had that day. And on the other hand, he was relieved to have been the person the director sent, just because they were about to film together.

Ivan was currently trying to convince Till to lie down in bed, although he was still reluctant. Not because he was afraid of waking up from sleep, but because he really wasn't sleepy enough to go to sleep.

“I said I'd try, not that I'd succeed. I didn't succeed, so I'll go do something else. You can sleep if you want.”

He was about to leave the room, but an arm extended across to the door frame stopped him. Till just turned to look at him in annoyance.

“Believe me, we won't be able to rest after tonight.”

“What are you saying, pervert?” The tone was the usual when Ivan said something strange out of nowhere.

“P..pervert?” he muttered, unaware that what of what he said had been misinterpreted. “I meant we're going to have a lot of work to do when recording. What were you thinking?”

He mentioned the recordings again. Till didn't feel like asking him about it, so he just rolled his eyes and walked away, taking Ivan's arm out of his way.

However, when he did, Ivan reacted quickly and hugged him from behind, picking him up and carrying him to the bed. He wasn't at all gentle when he dropped him on it.

First the blanket, and now this. Till thought Ivan wasn't afraid he'd get beaten up for it.

Resigned, he simply lay still in bed, resisting the urge to show him the finger, just as he had done with Luka.

Now that he thought about it, if this Ivan doesn't behave like the one he knows, it's likely that this Luka doesn't behave like the one he knows either.

That made him feel somewhat embarrassed for what he had done, but he also couldn't say that he didn't ask for it.

Maybe he deserved it, to some extent, since from what he saw, this Luka had been so bold as to threaten him.

“What are you thinking about now?” Ivan's soft, low voice brought him out of his thoughts.

He hadn't noticed that he had sat on the edge of the bed or that he was staring at him.

“I just... want to see everyone again.” After saying that, he turned his back on him.

That crushed Ivan's chicken like heart. He was really struggling not to cry in front of his superior. Maybe at first he thought what he was saying didn't make sense, but the joke wasn't funny enough for Till to continue if no one laughed.

"If you feel better tomorrow, how about we go to the recording studio? You'll be able to see everyone again there.

That made Till turn his head, and although he had many doubts, he agreed with the idea.

“Really?”

“Have I ever lied to you?”

Till stared at him, wondering whether to answer or not. And in the end, he decided to.

“Yeah, many times. Like the time you stole my pencil, and even though I asked you, you always denied everything. You've never been the most normal pet, so to speak.”

Ivan didn't even know where to start answering.

“Please don't tell people we're pets, or they'll look at you even weirder than I do.”

Till remembered what they'd been talking about regarding the reality he was currently in. He was used to calling others "pets" because, after all, that's all they were to the aliens, but of course, in that reality, it was weird to call others that because they weren't anyone's pets.

“Regarding that other thing... I can get an idea of ​​why you are so aggressive with me.”

The script and the director were on his side, and yet there were things he had no way of knowing, like what Till had told him.

“Right, you don't remember anything,” said Till in a low voice, closing his eyes.

It was really late. He couldn't believe he was feeling tired even though he could stay awake for so long before. He even moved around in bed again, this time turning to face Ivan.

Ivan could notice his tiredness, even though Till continued to deny wanting to sleep.

What he hadn't realized was that he had fallen asleep as soon as he stopped moving.

“Till?” he called in a whisper, but all he could hear was the soft sound of his breathing. “Sleep well.”

For some reason, he found it adorable, and he couldn't help but feel embarrassed at the thought. He shook his head and tried to get up from where he was sitting, only to sit back down when he felt something tugging at the sweater he was wearing.

It was Till's hand. He only now realized that Till had grabbed him as he turned around.

“You're really afraid of tomorrow coming...”

He had no choice but to lie down next to him, taking care not to wake him.

He could tell it wasn't the first time he'd been so close to him, but the situation made him feel strange. As if he were enjoying something that didn't belong to him.

And with that thought he closed his eyes and went to sleep.

Chapter Text

Morning came so quickly that Till couldn't process the fact that he was still there.

Nor the fact he woke up hugging Ivan.

Even though he knew he should pull away from the hug, he didn't want to, and it wasn't like Ivan was the one holding him in place.

Instead, he decided to ignore what was happening and think about what he had dreamed.

He was sure he had forgotten many things from his childhood, especially when he was no more than 5 years old, but his dream was precisely when he was still for sale.

He could remember feeling so sad for some strange reason. Even though everything was lit up, the place was depressing. It wasn't until he heard the sound of the doors opening that he looked at the aliens bringing in another human.

He didn't know what they would do with him, but for some reason Till was fascinated to see him.

He turned to look at him for a moment, and Till could see that both his hair and eyes were a dark color shade that was difficult to see. He was battered and dirty. Their circumstances seemed to be and not to be so different.

That was probably the first time he saw Ivan.

He couldn't believe he was remembering that now, when it had all ended like this.

But he couldn't think about it any longer when he heard someone enter the apartment out of nowhere. There were at least two people.

“Ivan?” he spoke in a whisper. “Ivan, wake up!”

He shook him as hard as he could, but he wouldn't wake up. He didn't know he was a heavy sleeper, so he decided to kick him out of bed.

That's what managed to wake him up.

“It was Luka's idea, ask Hyun-Woo—” he said quickly, until he realized where he was. “Oh, what's wrong?”

Till couldn't believe how unpreoccupied Ivan seemed to be right now when they might be getting robbed. And what about that statement? It made him curious about what he'd been dreaming about.

“Someone is here.”

Ivan wondered what he meant until he heard footsteps outside the room.

He didn't remember anyone else having the key to the apartment, so it could only be someone who knew where the spare key was.

“I think I know who it is, but before I tell you, you have to promise that you won't react aggressively toward this person.”

“What image do you have of me?” he said, annoyed.

Ignoring the question, Ivan got up from the floor and sat back down on the bed, beckoning him to come closer, which he did.

“I think it's your mom,” he said in a whisper.

Just after, the door to the room opened revealing a boy about five or six years old, who looked too much like Till.

“And your brother.”

“Till!” shouted the boy, stretching out the i.

“... Sorry?”

Till couldn't believe his eyes. The kid was identical to him in every way, like a miniature version of him. He looked back and forth between Ivan and the kid for a couple of seconds, not knowing what to do.

“Ottie! What did I tell you about doing that? Till was probably asleep.”

A woman of similar appearance also appeared at the entrance to the room. There was no doubt it was his mother. She looked exactly like him, but as a woman.

“Oh, Ivan? I didn't know you stayed over.” The woman approached and then shook Ivan's hands. “Thank you very much.”

Her tone was gentle. And now it was Till's turn to be confused about what was going on.

Okay, now he knew exactly what was going on.

The name of the woman Ivan had referred to as Till's mother was Io, and the name of the little boy was Ottie*. Apparently, the mysterious director had contacted her to inform her of the situation and make a decision regarding the filming of Ottie's scenes.

Who Till just found out plays as him when he was little in Anakt Garden.

“I wanted them to film the scenes as soon as possible so as not to disturb you too much when you were filming, but Banie* was determined to not do it until Till returned.” Io sighed.

After what had happened in the room, Io made them something quick to eat and invited them to sit down, almost forcing them. And right now they were still there, talking about it.

Till didn't want to ask too many questions. Io and Ottie were the first new people he'd met in a long time, and in that reality, they were related to him.

Unlike with Ivan, with her he felt shy enough to just stare and remain silent. He had no idea what to do.

But the mention of someone else caught his attention, so he had to ask.

“Who... is Banie?” He asked in a somewhat low tone.

However, he didn't expect that someone other than Io would answer his question.

“Banie is my best friend!” Ottie replied, who'd been drawing in the living room before, but coming over upon hearing Banie's name. “He was very sad yesterday. I hope he's better today.”

Although that didn't quite answer his question, it gave him some idea as to who it might be.

“You might already have an idea, but Banie is the one who plays as my character from when he was little. He really likes you for some strange reason.” Ivan let out a nervous chuckle.

Hearing that, Till really wanted to go to that recording studio and see it for himself.

“He's adorable! Sometimes they have to scold him because he insists on following you everywhere around the set.” Io was smiling at the thought.

According to what the director and Ivan had told her, Io was aware that Till was not acting like himself at that moment.

She was worried about what the reason for this could be, but there wasn't much she could do about it either. What calmed her a little was that she had now seen that Till wasn't in any danger.

Maybe he was just a little confused. After all, he'd started his career as a child and even continued it into adulthood. It was something he decided on his own, and she respected that.

They continued talking for a while, which made Till become more familiar with the two new people in his life.

It was probably already noon when Io realized it was time to leave.

“Look at the time, it's almost time for Ottie to go to the set. Although I don't know if they'll be able to film anything today.” Io sighed.

At that, Till quickly stood up, scaring the other two.

“Take me with you!— I mean, can I come?”

He remembered what Ivan had told him yesterday, so he didn't see any problem with it.

“Till, maybe you should rest your mind a little longer. I don't think it's goo-” Ivan was interrupted.

“No, I have to go. I have to know what the heck is going on here. Besides, you promised me. You said if I felt better we'd go see the others.”

“I did, didn't I..?” Right now Ivan was regretting saying such a thing.

“Honey, I don't think it's a good idea right now either. You still have time to rest today, make the most of it.” It was Io who suggested it this time.

“I don't need to rest. I've been through worse, so you don't have to worry about me.”

Of course, at first Till couldn't say the same.

But right now he was determined to see them no matter what.

Io and Ivan exchanged a glance. It was Ivan who opened his mouth to speak.

“Then let me let the director know. If you feel ready to record the scenes, we'll do it, but if not, that's okay too.”

Ivan's tone was so serious that Till didn't recognize him at all. If he tried to recall, he might have only heard it once from the Ivan he knew.

Hearing what he said about recording made him remember that in this reality, he was apparently an actor, not a pet. It wasn't like he missed being kept by Urak, either.

Anyway, if he had to do it, he was determined to do it, no matter what the challenge was.

“Then I'll wait for Ivan to talk to her. We can all go together if she approves of your return,” Io commented.

Ivan had moved away from them, calling with the device Till only now remembered existed. It seemed more useful than it looked.

And after a few minutes he came back, now with a smile on his face.

“Viv said she was okay with you going to the studio, but she'd kick you out if you tried anything weird.”

“Define strange?” Although he was puzzled by the name, he was even more puzzled by what Ivan was referring to.

“Uh, like trying to hit someone,” he said without looking directly at Till.

“... I'll try.”

He really couldn't guarantee anything if he saw Luka there again.

Chapter Text

The journey to the set wasn't easy, but it was quite entertaining for Ottie.

As soon as Till stepped outside the apartment, he began to regret the idea. He was determined, but it wasn't as if he wasn't afraid of what would come next.

In his mind he repeated over and over again: Do it for Mizi, Do it for Mizi.

Of course, if he really saw Mizi in this reality, he would no longer believe himself capable of returning to his own.

The apartment where he lived was inside a large building with hundreds of other apartments that Till could compare to the cells they used to put them in, but more comfortable to be in.

Walking through the halls would have been easier if there weren't people coming and going. Till couldn't help but think that any one of them could be an alien in disguise, and it was quite obvious on his faces.

He was even covering his face with the hoodie of the sweater he was wearing, for some reason.

“Uh.. Till, do you want to hold my hand?” Ivan offered.

He was walking right in front of him, but he became careful to not move too far away when he saw the difficulty Till was experiencing.

Io had gone ahead to wait for them in the vehicle, and Ottie had insisted on staying with Ivan and Till.

“...” Till couldn't open his mouth to speak, simply holding out his hand for Ivan to take.

Ivan gently took his hand. It was strangely warm, which brought a small smile to his face.

“I want to hold hands too!” Ottie asked, raising both hands.

“Sure, come here.” Ivan also took Ottie's hand.

They reached the elevator, where the ride was much more calm thanks to the absence of people. Ivan took advantage of this opportunity to talk to Till.

“In your... Reality? I imagine you're not used to seeing so many people.”

“...I am, but they're not usually as free as they are here. Every pet must always walk close to its owner.”

“I see. Wouldn't that make me your owner?” Ivan joked, knowing Till wouldn't take it as a joke.

“Pff.. Idiot,” Till muttered, hiding his soft chuckle.

Ivan was someone who always said the strangest things, and although Till would usually have responded back with a disgusted comment, for some reason he didn't.

That soft chuckle surprised Ivan, so he couldn't say anything else.

Finally, the three of them reached the first floor. When the elevator doors opened, Till could see an even larger number of people bustling about. This made him squeeze Ivan's hand even tighter. 

Ivan just hoped that he wouldn't break.

Right now, they were in the vehicle on the way to the set.

Ivan thought the hardest part was getting out of the building, but when they tried to get Till into the car it was a different story.

As soon as he saw Io arriving in the vehicle, Till almost ran away if it weren't for Ivan grabbing his arm in time.

He started asking questions just to confirm that Ivan and Io weren't betraying him to take him to the aliens. He even feared for Ottie's safety.

Once they managed to get him into the car and put his seatbelt on, they had to put the child safety lock on the door in case Till decided to jump out.

“You know, we can still go back to your apartment. Tomorrow won't be too late for you to see them.” Ivan was having way too many doubts about whether it was a good idea to take him today.

“No... I'm fine.” Till said, although he looked paler than usual.

Io and Ivan looked at each other, worried. However, they could do nothing but comply with Till's request.

All the way there, Ottie talked to Till about what he did on the set. Sometimes, when something caught his eye outside the car window, he'd have Till look and explain what he knew about it.

That at least made Till relax during the trip. And it also made him feel a strange affection for his now younger brother.

And finally they arrived at the recording studio.

It was really big for Till's taste.

The only good thing was that there weren't as many people as there were in his apartment building.

Io pulled into the parking lot, driving up to where the figure of someone was standing in front of an entrance.

“We're here. Can you take Ottie with you? I'll find a parking space.”

Ivan nodded and got out of the car. He first opened the door for Ottie, who, although he knew better than to open the doors when the car was moving, also had to keep the lock on just in case. He got out and ran to the person waiting for them, and the person greeted him with a hug.

Ivan then opened the door for Till, helping him remove his seatbelt.

“Ready?” Ivan smiled at him.

“No.”

Even as he said that, he took Ivan's hand again to get out of the car. Ivan then closed the door so Io could leave.

“Everything will be okay,” Ivan whispered to him.

At that, the person standing at the entrance approached them, carrying Ottie.

“Till! Ivan! It's so nice to see you arrived safely.” The woman smiled at them both.

Till froze. He didn't know this woman, but she seemed to know them both. He could only look at Ivan with preoccupation.

“Oh, right. Till, she's the director of the Alien Stage project, Vivinos.”

What had he just said? Alien Stage? Now that he thought about it, the letters before "project" seemed familiar, but he hadn't suspected anything from the start.

“Crap...” Till's face changed completely to one of horror. “You.. You're a traitor!”

How could Ivan even think of taking him to the place he had tried so hard to escape? 

“What? Till, you're wrong—” Ivan tried to approach him to calm him down, but he moved away like he had done before.

“'The opportunity you missed that day'? Yeah, right. I just walked out of one nightmare and into another one. It has to be one if you're here! Idiot, how could you?!”

He didn't want to sing. He didn't want to die. And he didn't want to live locked up again.

The director saw this, and couldn't help but think that this wasn't just a mental problem where Till was too much into his role.

She knew her characters better than anyone, and at this moment she knew he wouldn't be calmed by a few nice words from Ivan.

She turned to look at the Ivan, but he seemed to have no idea what to do, and with clearly no way to try to deal with Till.

She sighed, approaching Ivan from behind and whispering something to him. What he heard seemed like something difficult for Ivan to do, but he couldn't doubt her at that moment.

He nodded and continued to approach Till, who continued to take steps back.

“Stay back,” Till warned.

“Till, stop acting like an idiot yourself.” Ivan's tone sounded almost angry, and he didn't want to say it that way, but he didn't have any other choice.

“... Excuse me?” He sounded offended. He hadn't expected the man to try to reprimand him for what he said.

“I know you think none of this is real, but I assure you it is. All of us are! And we're just as confused by how you're acting as you are with us. But above all, I assure you that nothing you think about this place is what you think it is. Why can't you just trust me?”

The director was alarmed when Ivan asked that question. Knowing Till well, she knew he wouldn't say anything nice.

“Ivan, I don't believe—” She was interrupted.

“Do you think I don't trust you? I trust you so much it hurts! I've always trusted you so much, but you never tell me anything! You're a damn mystery to me, and yet I can't help but trust you!”

“Please! I'm not that Ivan. Your Ivan is dead!” As soon as he said those words, Ivan covered his mouth.

“He's dead. Of course... Of course he is.”

The look in his eyes was unfocused, as if he had lost all meaning in his life upon hearing those words.

Of course Ivan was dead. Till watched him die.

In the middle of the stage, after he'd been shot at least twice. After throwing up blood, and after kissing him. After giving him the most sincere and expressive smile Till had ever seen from him.

Of course he was dead.

For some reason, his heart ached. He even reached over to the area where his heart was and grabbed hard against his clothes.

On the other hand, Vivinos had the angriest face Ivan had ever seen. He didn't realize that "this" Iván could only imitate his character if he was given a script beforehand.

They had very distinct personalities, even though it didn't seem that way when recording.

“Go inside, please,” the director requested.

Ivan couldn't even look at her, but he obeyed her order, taking Ottie with him.

The little kid wanted to know what had happened, since he had lost track of the conversation since they started fighting, but Ivan simply asked him to follow him without answering any questions.

The director sighed when she was left alone with Till. She could see that those words broke his heart.

He'd tried so hard to escape what he'd experienced that a simple memory could easily shatter him. She understood, though she'd never thought something like this would happen.

Who would have thought that the mind of one of her characters would possess one of her actors? It was strange, but the proof was in what was happening right now.

Vivinos approached Till, who didn't even try to move away from her. She placed her hand on his back in an attempt to comfort him.

“It's okay to cry, I know it hurts. I'm so sorry, Till.”

She couldn't hold back from giving him a hug, and he could only cry on her shoulder after that.

Inside the recording studio, all the actors were eagerly awaiting Till's arrival. Of course, even Hyun-Woo, but out of all the minis, only Banie was there.

They didn't expect Ivan to arrive only accompanied by Ottie, and even crying.

“Hey, am I seeing things or is Ivan crying?” Mizi asked.

“I would recognize Ivan crying with my eyes closed, so I'm sure he is,” Luka replied, sounding somewhat puzzled by what he was seeing.

“Ivan, what happened?” Sua asked, since no one dared to approach him right now, not even Luka.

“I ruined it...” Ivan whispered.

Everyone looked at each other in surprise, so Ivan had to tell them what had happened.

And indeed, just as expected, everyone scolded him even worse than the director could have done.

“Poor Till! If Sua had said that to me, after what my character actually went through, I don't think I'd forgive you for it, ever.” Mizi commented, who was being hugged by Sua.

Luka discreetly watched Hyuna and Hyun-Woo, putting himself in the shoes of the two couples from the project.

“Me neither.”

At that moment, two people entered where all the other actors were.

It was the director and Till.

Chapter Text

The first thing that caught Till's eye was Ivan, who looked more depressed than an abandoned dog.

However, right now he couldn't care about it enough.

His words had hurt him enough to think he didn't care if Ivan was dead; he could go on living without him. Of course, it was just a thought.

Mizi approached him timidly.

The situation had been explained to the other actors that same day, for fear that something uncalled-for might happen, just like the big mistake Ivan had made minutes before.

“Till, how are you feeling?” She asked, trying not to scare him.

Till turned his gaze to her, amazed by the fact that she was standing before him, alive.

“M.. Mizi? Is it really you?”

Mizi didn't expect the question, and had no idea how to answer.

Sure, she could try to not think about it too much and say it was really her, but she didn't want to give false hope to someone who thought she was someone else.

“I...”

However, she was interrupted by a boy who ran past her.

He went straight to hug Till's legs, without making any other noise. And immediately, Till knew who it was.

He would be stupid if he didn't realize, as that child was identical to Ivan as a child, when they went to Anakt Garden.

“Till, this is Banie!” Said a very excited Ottie.

Banie looked up, and his gaze met Till's. Meeting him was definitely not something Till had been expecting any time soon.

“Banie, give Till some space. He's probably not feeling well yet,” said a slightly older man, at least much older than the young actors.

The man was elegantly dressed, and his expression was rather serious. Banie was quick to obey his orders, which Till didn't find as odd as he thought.

“But Unsha! Banie was so sad yesterday, isn't it okay if you let him hug Till a little longer? I don't want him to keep being sad.” Ottie looked even sadder than Banie could ever be.

“Un..sha?” Till whispered.

Everyone had a strange realization that that name didn't sit well with Till.

“Uh... Yes! You see, Unsha is Banie's adoptive father. I assure you, this person and the one you know are very different from each other.” Was the director's attempt to calm everyone down.

Still, Till couldn't help but be suspicious of what he was told.

“I assure you too, Till. This world is very different from the one you know, and you're going to love it.” Mizi gave him a warm smile.

There was a slight blush on Till's face, almost invisible unless one stood close enough.

But Sua seemed to notice, as she slowly pulled Mizi towards her.

Till felt happy deep inside more than anything.

He thought his first reaction upon seeing them again would be to cry his eyes out, but strangely, that wasn't the case. He felt calm, as if he were finally where he wanted to be, free.

But his happiness was interrupted when he saw Luka approaching.

“Wow, I thought you'd hit her just like you hit Ivan. You've really improved, Till.” Luka smiled as if it were the most normal thing in the world.

Till remembered Ivan's words about not being able to try anything strange, so therefore he couldn't hit Luka right now either.

Although he also remembered that he didn't have to pay any mind to the words of the dead.

He just smiled.

“Of course I wouldn't hit her, but it seems like you're offering yourself as a sacrifice in case I ever try to.”

Everyone could see the sparks flying from their glares.

“Wow, no one's going to hit anyone here.” It was Hyuna who stood between the two.

Till had no idea who she was, at least not as much as he'd like. If she's part of this cast, it means she's someone who exists, and that he would have seen eventually if he had stayed in his reality. He didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

Furthermore, he didn't even want to continue the fight when he saw the soft, kind smile on her face. The complete opposite of Luka.

Till just turned away, looking slightly embarrassed.

“Everything okay? Knowing Till, I'd expected a bit more of a reaction to a reality where no one dies, wow” The director stood next to Till.

Unintentionally, the actors couldn't help but look at her as if it was all her fault.

And honestly, in part it was.

But she gave them their jobs, so they couldn't complain.

“I'm really happy,” Till whispered. “There's so many stuff that I'm not familiar with, but the people I grew up with are still alive here so... I couldn't ask for anything more. I think I'm actually afraid of waking up now...”

Till placed a hand on his chest, right where his heart rested. There was no pain, but he felt a great sorrow. The director noticed this.

“Mhn, yes. I suppose all of this may still seem like a dream to you, Till. But look at them all in the eyes. Do you think you could dream of people you don't know, have never met, and never will meet? I don't exist as such in your reality, and yet I know you better than anyone here. You can't just dream that, can you?”

Suddenly she heard a voice calling her, so she just smiled and walked towards it, leaving him there.

That made him think.

He actually raised his head and looked at each of them. There was no doubt that each of their gazes reflected different things, and that wasn't something Till could dream of. He wasn't capable of giving someone else ambitions if he himself lost his own.

He had so much to acknowledge about that reality.

His gaze fell on Ivan, who was sitting next to Ottie and Banie, quite far away from where Till was. Unsha was nowhere to be seen now.

While Ottie seemed to be talking to Ivan and showing him something he had drawn, Banie seemed to be staring at Till, as if he were the only thing in that place worthy of his attention.

There was something strangely familiar about his gaze.

“Iv-.. Banie, come here,” Till called, kneeling in his place.

As soon as Banie heard those gentle words, he jumped down from the couch and ran to hug Till. There was no doubt that the boy held him in high regard.

“I missed you, Till,” Banie whispered.

“I'm sorry...”

Banie shook his head and slowly pulled away from the hug. His face still showed no emotion beyond calm.

“It's not me who deserves an apology, it's you. Cheer up, Till.” He smiled.

“Ivan..?”

‘Is it dead?’

‘... Cheer up, cheer up!’

‘Cheer up.’

‘A loser is someone with no friends.’

‘So you are.’

That memory came to his mind.

“I'm not Ivan, I'm Banie.” His words brought him out of his thoughts.

That child's gaze had softened so much that it was no longer the same familiar gaze he had felt before.

As if it had been an illusion.

“Thanks, Banie.” Till smiled at him as he hugged him again.

“Huh?” The boy was confused, but he wouldn't complain about that hug either.

“So, what do you want to do? We can start recording today or not, but tomorrow it inevitably has to happen.”

The director had separated Ivan and Till from the rest, even though she knew that these two had not been on good terms for a while since then.

She felt guilty about what happened, but there wasn't much she could do to fix it as of now.

“I can do it, but he...” although he was talking about Till, he didn't turn to look at him.

For his part, Till was seriously thinking about what he should do.

He could choose not to record today, but he would do it tomorrow even if he didn't want to. And if he record today, then he wouldn't have enough time to process anything else.

However, it was a fact that he knew what was going to happen. And just remembering it gave him the chills.

“I don't know if I can... relive it again. Even though I know it's not real.”

He was looking down, strangely docile thanks to the fact that he didn't know the person in front of him well.

“I understand. How about we watch the minis film today? We couldn't do it yesterday because Banie really wanted to see you, but now that you're here everything should be fine.” She smiled at him.

Till nodded. Now that he thought about it, Io had mentioned that to him that morning. He wanted to see how good Ottie and Banie were that they would be chosen for the project.

The director guided them to where the others were.

“Okay, everyone! Let's start from the top with the mini Till and mini Ivan scenes. Those not participating in the shoot can choose to leave or stay, but please don't get in the way of others.”

Upon hearing this, Mizi, Sua and Hyuna decided to leave the set, but not before saying goodbye to Till.

“See you tomorrow!” Mizi said as she walked hand in hand with Sua.

The other two girls just waved goodbye before walking away.

Luka had stayed to accompany Hyun-Woo and the very depressed Ivan.

Hyun-Woo was part of the lighting crew. He was very dedicated to his job and helped look after Hyuna, even though Luka also looked after her on and off set.

They got along quite well, but they couldn't really call themselves close. The only person who united them was Hyuna.

“Good. Banie, Ottie! Come here, we're going to start the scenes at Anakt Garden.”

“We're coming!”

Till couldn't see where they had come from, but something weird had happened there.

Those children were now dressed just like how Till and Ivan had looked back in the Garden. Even the small differences between the minis and the adults had disappeared, like perfect carbon copies.

Ottie held Banie's hand, and Banie let himself be led by the other without a word of disagreement.

A soft smile escaped his lips as he watched them both excitedly run to where they were asked. And Ivan could see that.

“No, in this memory... Ivan had remained confused until we started hitting each other.”

To help Till relax a little, Vivinos had asked his opinion on the scene where the minis were fighting, not expecting Till to remember and describe everything in great detail. He even seemed to be having fun.

“Banie, try looking at Ottie as if... as if you don't understand why he's angry with you, and Ottie, you're going to push him first, not hit him directly,” Till suggested.

“Wow. Till, you were really paying attention to Ivan all this time,” the director, who was sitting next to him, joked.

She wished she had expected it, but she certainly hadn't expected that Till would turn to look at her with a face of surprise and embarrassment at the same time.

“I j..just have a good memory. We've been friends for so long, e..even if I didn't remember, I think I'd be able to tell how he'd act and... how he'd look at me.”

“Of course, who knows him better than you do? There can't be anyone.”

She wanted Till to feel confident that he knew Ivan better than anyone else. She could give him at least that much confidence.

Chapter Text

Till was shocked by what he had discovered today.

Ottie and Banie managed to record all the small scenes required for the round, and among them were scenes that Till wished he hadn't seen.

Not because they were bad, but because they really opened his eyes to everything Ivan did behind his back.

For years.

Time after time.

He had a headache that came and went every time he remembered it.

For example, the scene where Till fought with the alien dog, the one where Ivan touched him without a care in the world, or the dang scene where they almost escaped. Each and every one of them had a hidden message for Till, and he didn't like it at all.

“Well, that was it for today. It wasn't much, but Ottie and Banie did amazing, as always.” The director praised them.

There was a very lively "Thank you" from Ottie and a soft "Thank you" from Banie.

“What did you think, Till?” She turned to look at him.

However, he wasn't paying attention. Instead, he looked lost. It wasn't until he felt someone take his hand that he remembered what he was doing.

It was the small Banie, who was now giving him a smile.

He couldn't help thinking that his attitude, before and after that conversation between them, had changed drastically. As if Ivan, the one he knew, had spoken to him for the last time through him. Now he seemed like just an innocent child with the appearance of an Ivan he would never forget. 

“I'm sorry. What did you say?” Till asked, bending down to stroke Banie's head.

The director couldn't help think it was a cute sight.

“What did you think of Ottie and Banie's performance?”

“Oh.. both of them were great. I couldn't help but think I was seeing my own memories for a moment.”

“You're very strange, Till” Ottie said, which got a laugh from the director.

“I can't take it anymore. The guilt is eating me alive...” said a very discouraged Vivinos.

After the minis finished recording, the director used the excuse that she was going to review what angles of the scenes they could use to escape the tense atmosphere between Ivan and Till.

Of course, Luka, Hyun-Woo and the minis were there too, but they also seemed to have agreed to leave those two alone, in the same place, and her in the crossfire.

So after giving that excuse, she actually went to where the recordings were being reviewed, since her partner was also there reviewing them.

“I know you know your characters well, but the actors aren't them at all. You really shouldn't have told him to treat him like that. Don't you, more than anyone, feel the most sorry for Till?” Qmeng said gently.

The project's co-director, who worked to ensure everything was going according with Vivinos' vision, Qmeng.

“I know, and that's why I feel bad. What can I do to make everything better?” the director murmured.

“Well, you could apologize and lock them up in a room until they talk and work it out,” she said out of nowhere, obviously joking.

“... What a great idea” It was as if a light bulb had turned on above her head.

“Huh?... Wait. You're not going to do it, are you?” But by the time she realized, she'd already stood up to leave.

Not without giving her a kiss on the cheek first.

“You're the best, Meng!” She shouted when she was already a bit far away.

“Oh.. I'm sorry Till. I'm sorry Ivan.”

Right now, Ivan and Till were sitting on the same couch, leaving a space between them. Neither of them looked at the other.

Till looked bored, while Ivan looked on the verge of self-deletion.

And although it didn't seem like it from Till, they were both clearly frustrated by the fight. At least for Ivan, it was normal to not talk to someone who was clearly angry with him, especially if he was the one to blame.

But that wasn't the case for Till.

First of all, Till didn't have many friends, if any at all, besides Ivan, Mizi, and Sua. The latter two were questionable, though he didn't need to know it.

Still, for Till and Ivan, fighting was a common occurrence, but they never stopped talking. He wondered if their constant arguing back then hadn't been serious enough for that to be the case, but there was something he was forgetting.

They were not the same.

He was having a hard time remembering that they weren't the same.

The reason they never stopped talking even after a fight, no matter the reason, was Ivan. He never seemed frustrated, restless, or scared when talking to Till after their fights. He also almost never apologized, which eventually became a habit for both of them.

Till turned slightly to where Ivan was sitting. He was quite surprised to see the expression on his face.

Although some of his hair was covering his eyes, he could see that there were still tears on his cheeks, which he wiped away whenever he felt them. His nose was also slightly red, and what little he could see through his hair was how irritated the corners of his eyes were. He had no idea how long he'd been like that, but seeing it now made him feel bad.

One thing he couldn't deny was that what he'd said in that fight was inevitably true, and even if the person he knew wouldn't have said it in that way, he would still have said it differently.

He couldn't blame him much.

Well, who was he kidding. He couldn't stand seeing him like that anymore.

“Ivan, I'm s—” but, he was interrupted by the director who sat between them, in the place that separated them.

“Hey! Huh...” They both turned to look at her, which sent a shiver down her spine. “Well, I wanted to apologize for what happened when you arrived here at the set. I think I went too far by telling Ivan to calm you down like that, Till, although it wasn't the way I thought he was going to say it... But what I'm trying to get at is, I really feel bad that you're fighting now because of it...”

“... Viv, it's okay, you don't have to—” this time it was Ivan who was interrupted.

“With that said, could you accompany me somewhere?”

Of course, she didn't bother explaining where she was taking them until the two were shoved inside a break room on set.

“As a little help, you can use this time alone to sort things out. I'm really sorry!” Saying that, she closed the door.

But that wasn't all, she jammed a chair against the handle because she couldn't lock it from the outside.

They both wondered if she was really apologizing with that or if she wanted them to hate her.

“Ah.. I forgot my phone on the couch,” Ivan muttered after checking his pockets.

He could have sent a message to Luka or Hyun-Woo if he had brought it, but now he was really stuck there.

With Till.

An alien invasion didn't sound like such a bad idea right now.

In Till's case, although he hadn't expected the director to do this, it was convenient for him as now he could apologize without being interrupted.

But it was very uncomfortable after everything had happened.

They both turned to look at each other, not knowing that the other would do it too, so they quickly looked away.

Too uncomfortable.

But someone had to speak up, so Till mentally slapped himself to shoo that discomfort away.

“Ivan—”

“Till—”

They both stopped. They had spoken at the same time without meaning to.

“I...” Till didn't know what to say now.

“Forgive me.”

“Wh..what?”

“Please forgive me. Even though it was something I was told to do, I know I shouldn't have done it. I shouldn't have.. said any of that to you. So please... Forgive me.”

Ivan spoke up and apologized first, which made Till even more frustrated. Of course, he should apologize, but he didn't feel like it was Ivan or the director who should do it. 

“No.”

That took Ivan by surprise, and he looked up at Till. It was clear from his face that he hadn't expected that answer, and Till knew it.

“I can't forgive you. You're not the one who should be apologizing in the first place. Ivan, I'm sorry... All this time... I've really just been comparing you to someone who doesn't even exist anymore.” Even though it hurt, he had to say it. “You said it, and you're not wrong. I was the one who reacted badly, and that's why I should apologize. It's not fair to you.”

Till had his reasons to be paranoid. 

It wasn't normal to wake up in a completely different place after witnessing the death of someone who had been with him almost his entire life. It would be the last thing he thought would happen.

But if this was his reality now, as hard as it was to believe, maybe he could try to be a little more honest about what he felt. Even if sometimes he didn't fully understand it.

“But, still—”

“Ivan, if you keep apologizing to me, I swear I'm going to hit you,” Till threatened.

Not only did he feel like Ivan wasn't the one who should be apologizing to him, but he also wasn't entirely comfortable with the mere thought of him apologizing for every single thing. So he had to resort to something he knew would shut him up.

“Sorr—” He left the word hanging, not knowing if that counted or not, but judging by Till's reaction, he thought it did.

“What was that?” Till cracked his knuckles.

Till had a scary aura around him right now. It made all the tension from moments ago fade away, but now it was frightening.

He was slowly approaching, which made Ivan also slowly retreat.

Although he couldn't continue any further, as he crashed into a couch and fell on it. Now he had to watch from where he was sitting, and it wasn't any better.

Till ended up standing right in front of him, between his legs. He crossed his arms.

“Thought so.”

Only now could he get a good look at Ivan's face. It was a mess, and he felt even more sorry for it. He could even notice that some of his locks had lost its straightness and were starting to curl.

He couldn't help but bend down and touch them with his hands. He'd never imagined Ivan having this kind of hair, but then again, he was trying not to compare it.

“Till..?” Ivan calling him brought him out of his thoughts. 

He was very close.

What was with that face? It looked like someone had done something very inappropriate to him.

He couldn't help but blush slightly at this. What was he doing thinking about such things? He hadn't even thought them about Mizi before, but he was thinking them about Ivan? 

Oh, right, it was he himself the one who did those inappropriate things now.

When Ivan called for him, he realized he was standing too close to his face. One of his knees was even resting on the couch. But that wasn't all.

Just like yesterday, Till took Ivan's face in his hands again, a little softer than before, and brought their lips together in a kiss.

Ivan couldn't believe this was happening again. But this time there was something different about the kiss, something he couldn't quite tell just yet.

And while he didn't hate him, he couldn't say he was entirely comfortable. Just as Till always thought of the other Ivan when he was with him, Ivan couldn't help thinking that the Till he knew wouldn't agree with it.

He wanted to refute, even show some resistance, but something stopped him. The way Till held him—he couldn't deny it was so warm and so...

Full of love.

The way their gazes met made him shiver every time. He couldn't take it anymore.

Well, maybe he could enjoy it a little. Just a little.

And it really didn't last long, as the door was opened.

“Ivan, Till, the director said that—”

Luka froze at what he was seeing.

And the other two couldn't have been more embarrassed.

“Sorry, I didn't see anything.” Just as he came, he went.

But once outside the room, Luka couldn't control his expression any longer. He was blushing wildly as he covered his face. How embarrassing for everyone.

Hyun-Woo approached him, as he had been left behind by Luka, only to find him like this.

“Oh, Luka, did you tell them- What's wrong?” Hyun-Woo was surprised by Luka's obvious embarrassment.

“I need to wash my eyes,” he muttered.

Chapter Text

Hyun-Woo was laughing very loudly while Luka was just using a hand fan to lower the heat on his face.

After saying that to Hyun-Woo, the two quickly left for the main set. Of course, Luka didn't tell what he'd seen, and for now, he wouldn't.

He was so shocked that the embarrassment wouldn't leave his face. And of course, Hyun-Woo found that amusing.

“It's the first time I've seen you like this, I can't-” he laughed between words.

“Enough, how was I supposed to know that—... Forget it” He was about to say it, but decided to keep quiet.

“To know what? Come on, you can't leave me wondering, Luka. Besides, it doesn't matter if you don't tell me. I know you'll tell Hyuna. She never keeps secrets from me.” Hyun-Woo seemed pretty sure that that would be the case.

“There are things... that I can't tell Hyuna either.”

At first, Luka really considered telling Hyun-Woo what he had seen inside the room, but it was seriously so embarrassing that he preferred not to even think that he saw it.

Come on, the two of them were kissing and seemed ready to take the next step. Anyone would be embarrassed to interrupt that situation.

Of course, it's not like Luka was innocent in that regard, but it wasn't something he would do either.

“Then how about I go and see for myself? It's just Ivan and Till.”

Hyun-Woo didn't seem aware of what could have happened between those two.

“No, Hyun-Woo—”

Hyun-Woo was already walking toward the break room, so Luka had to chase after him. He grabbed him by the sweater he was wearing, pulling on it to stop him in his tracks, and while it somehow worked, in terms of strength, Hyun-Woo won.

That didn't stop Luka, who had no way of knowing if the other two were still at it or had had the decency to stop. He kept tugging at the sweater, which was starting to annoy Hyun-Woo.

“Luka, let me go!” He kept trying to walk dragging Luka along.

“I'm telling you, you don't have to go,” he said firmly, although he looked like a child trying to get his mother's attention.

“If you won't tell me, then I have a reason to. How bad can it be? You're acting like you've seen them—” He stopped in his tracks as realization dawned on him. “Are they... a couple?”

Hyun-Woo had turned to Luka, who let go when he saw that he wasn't trying to walk away. But his question took him by surprise, causing his embarrassment to return slightly.

“Don't jump to conclusions, it's nothing like that.” He tried to remain calm. He wasn't lying, but it seemed like he was.

“Oh, really? You're turning red again. It's not convincing.”

“But it's the truth. And yet I can't tell you what I saw.”

There was a soft "Tsk" from Hyun-Woo, who thought Luka would finally tell him what he saw. Still, he had a vague idea now. He didn't need to dig any deeper.

“Fine, I'll leave it. You win.”

Luka sighed, and Hyun-Woo couldn't help but smile. Sometimes, he was happy to have someone like him by his beloved sister's side when he couldn't be there himself.

“You're a pain, Hyun-Woo.”

Those two owed him one.

And of course he was going to get that favor back.

On Ivan and Till's side, well, things could be worse.

After being interrupted by Luka, Till realized what he was doing.

When he said he was going to be more honest about his feelings, that's not what he meant. No, of course not.

He was so confused. 

He was sure he didn't look at Ivan that way, so why did he feel the need to kiss him? He didn't even have fond memories of that action. The worst part was that it was involuntary.

He turned away from Ivan, his gaze on anything but him.

What if he hated him now?

What if he couldn't forgive him now?

What if he woke up now and it turned out everything was a dream?

What about now?

Question after question flooded his mind. He was afraid of closing his eyes.

“Till! Everything's okay!”

Oh. It was Ivan.

Ivan grew worried when he saw Till's face. He could see his confusion and desperation from just one small action. His mind was very weak, weaker than he imagined.

He did not hesitate to go and take him in his arms to hug him.

His breathing was agitated, and just like before he was also trembling slightly. 

For someone else, dealing with Till might've been a pain, but for Ivan it was the complete opposite.

From the moment he met him, at the beginning of the recordings, he couldn't help but think he was amazing. He admired his work, and his personality. It was truly a strange feeling that Ivan had grown accustomed to over time. 

Till was independent, so Ivan rarely had anything he could do for him. It was also one of the reasons why they weren't as close as fans believed them to be. 

But right now, even though his personality had changed drastically, to Ivan he was still Till. A Till he might never have the chance to see again due to his circumstances.

If he could help him, if he could take care of him, then he would. No matter how annoying it might be to others.

“It's okay. Everything's okay. There's nothing wrong with what you did, Till. Don't be so cruel to yourself,” Ivan whispered.

Those words reached Till, and the gentle voice managed to calm him. Or rather, it wasn't the voice, but the proximity.

He couldn't remember a moment when Ivan wasn't by his side.

Now he saw it.

They both remained silent for a long time, in the same position. Ivan even began caressing Till's back, seeing that he didn't refuse.

There came a moment when Ivan noticed that Till had closed his eyes, his expression much better than before.

“Till, let's go home.”

It was already quite late when the recordings ended. The sun was setting, and it was fascinating to see for Till.

He couldn't look at it for as long as he had looked at it in the Garden. There was something about it that made them distinctly different, and he liked it.

“See you tomorrow!” the director said goodbye, while the co-director waved goodbye.

The drive home was relaxing, but short.

This time, Ottie sat in the passenger seat while Ivan sat next to Till.

In the blink of an eye, it seemed that Till had become obsessed with the idea of ​​having Ivan close to him, more than necessary.

Along the way, Ottie told Io everything he'd done that day, since she couldn't be there for some scenes. This wasn't unusual, as she trusted the little one would be safe while he was with Till and the rest of the cast.

The car stopped for both of them to get off.

“We're here. Ivan, are you staying again?” Io asked.

“If Till is okay with it, I don't see why not. Besides, I still have to take care of him today,” Ivan said.

Io giggled.

“Sure. Then Till, take good care of Ivan too.”

Till snorted at the implication that he didn't know how to take care of others. Or Ivan, for that matter.

“I will. Ottie, Io- Uh.. M.. Mom, see you later.” It was hard to say, since it wasn't a word he used in any case.

After saying goodbye, the two went up to Till's apartment. It was a little less stressful than the first time for Till. 

While inside, they both had a realization.

“Ivan.”

“Yes?”

“I'm hungry.”

It was relaxing that both of them were eating face to face. It reminded him of the peaceful days in the Garden. Although the food in front of him was much better than what they usually served there.

“Tomorrow is the big day, huh...” Till whispered.

How much he was willing to record those scenes that gnawed at his mind wasn't much. However, he would do it.

“Till, don't think about it too much.”

It was easier said than done.

“I wish, but...” Till seemed to hold back from saying anything else.

He didn't want to overwhelm Ivan with his problems. They were his alone now.

“Then you can tell me. Whatever it is, I'll listen. Even if I don't have an answer, I'll listen. It's the least I can do for you.”

Till couldn't help but make a reflexive grimace of disgust, but he quickly shook it off.

“Sorry, I know you mean it but I still can't get used to this cheesy version of you,” Till said, trying to hide a smile.

“Cheesy? I wonder how different Ivan is from me.”

Till noticed the way he referred to himself, and he didn't like it very much.

“Well, I think if he had grown up in a place like this that's full of humans, he'd be you. I think the only difference.. would be that.”

Of course, there was nothing he wouldn't give to have that Ivan by his side. The same weirdo who followed him everywhere, invaded his personal space, and stole his things. However, there was nothing he could do now.

The scenario changed, and he had to adapt to it.

He thought he couldn't do it, but from beginning to end, he's always been there to guide him.

What did it matter if he wasn't the Ivan Till knew, the important thing was that he was there. 

By his side, always.

Till covered his face with both hands. Ivan thought he was about to cry, seeing how his shoulders were shaking, but he couldn't have been more wrong. Little by little, the soft sound of laughter could be heard, the volume gradually increasing.

Till was laughing.

Although there were some tears on his eyelashes, they were tears of happiness.

“I really am stupid... and you keep following after me no matter where I go, Ivan.”

Ivan couldn't help but laugh at this too.

“Pff.. I really don't understand you, Till. But it doesn't matter, I'm willing to follow you despite that.”

The atmosphere around them became joyful and peaceful, a feeling Till was familiar with when he was around Ivan.

It was time to sleep.

They had both taken a shower and changed into more comfortable clothes. To Ivan's surprise, some of Till's pajamas fit him quite well.

Till didn't feel tired enough to sleep, but Ivan kept urging him to go to bed. 

“Is there really nothing I can do to make you sleep?” Ivan was physically tired, and he didn't understand why Till, who was more active than him, wasn't.

Till thought about it for a bit, and it didn't take long for him to remember that there was something that could even knock him out.

“Maybe... Maybe if...” but the words wouldn't come out.

Ivan was paying attention to what Till might say, so it frustrated Till more.

He could only swallow his pride and open his arms in anticipation, which Ivan immediately understood.

He noticed it too. When he was hugging him earlier, he had closed his eyes and his breathing had slowed. He even thought he was asleep, although he wasn't.

But that wasn't all. The night before, Till had even prevented Ivan from sleeping anywhere else, forcing him to sleep with him.

It was an adorable pattern in Ivan's eyes.

“Come here, it's time to sleep,” Ivan said in a soft voice.

And so, another day ended.

Chapter Text

The next day, the alarm on Ivan's phone was the one that woke them up. Or at least just Ivan this time.

It was barely 7 a.m., and although they didn't need to get to the set that early, Ivan preferred not to waste the morning at all when it was a work day. If it were a day off, of course he'd spend the whole day in bed.

He turned to see where Till was supposed to be sleeping, but to his surprise, he wasn't there.

Ivan got up as quickly as he could and threw off the blanket. Till couldn't have escaped, could he?

He didn't want to panic without checking the apartment first, so he slowly left the room while rubbing his eyes.

He didn't have to walk far before he realized Till was in the living room. He was sitting on the floor, but his arms and head were resting on the couch. He had no idea why he was there.

“Till, what are you doing here?” He whispered as he approached.

“...eel bad,” Till muttered, but Ivan could only hear the last part.

It was already strange enough to find him in that situation, but as he got closer he could see that there was something else.

He knelt in front of him and made him look at him.

Till was sweating a little, and when he put his hand to his forehead, he also felt it was a little warmer than usual. Above all, Till didn't seem to have the strength to move or refute anything Ivan was doing to him, like just now.

“How long have you been here?” His voice was filled with concern.

Till shook his head slowly, not even looking at him.

“I have no idea.. The sun.. hadn't risen yet.”

That worried him even more. It meant he'd been there far too long, probably in that same state.

Ivan didn't ask any more questions. Carefully, he slipped his arms under Till's arms and legs, lifting him up and effectively carrying him to the bed.

His symptoms seemed like those of a cold, but that was almost impossible considering it was almost summer. So he could also deduce that it was probably due to the stress of having to "relive" something undoubtedly traumatic.

And he was not wrong.

Ivan went to the kitchen to get a cloth, wet it a little, and then returned to Till. He brushed back the hair that was resting on his forehead, placing the cloth carefully. At least that would help him a little, but he needed to give him some medicine, and he had noticed Till didn't have any of that for some reason.

However, he didn't want to leave him alone at all. He had to ask someone for help, and he had to do it quickly. His mind couldn't even think well in that situation, feeling alarmed and scared even when the situation wasn't a life-or-death one.

“Hang on a bit, okay?” He tried to comfort him.

He grabbed his phone and sent a text. He knew Till didn't like this person right now, but it was the only person he knew would respond quickly at this hour.

And while he waited, he made sure not to leave Till's sight, who had been staring at him ever since he had brought him to bed.

Till felt so bad, both physically and mentally. Not because of the simple fact that he'd have to go through it all again, but because of the damn dream... no, more like the damn nightmare he'd had.

In it, Till tried to stop Ivan from sacrificing himself for him. He yelled at him, pulled him, and even hit him, but Ivan kept smiling at him like the last time. 

There was no one around them. They were standing on the stage, but only a few red light spots, the rain, the microphones, and them were visible.

Yet there wasn't a moment where Till didn't feel like Ivan was going to die. He knew it. He knew it was meant to be, even if he took his hand right now and they ran away.

He was going to die.

But despite all that, Ivan didn't seem that worried.

“Did you notice?” His voice echoed even in that large space.

“...” Till's voice couldn't come out now, as if he could only be a spectator.

“I'm sure you hate me. And yet, you're crying so hard that you make me believe you have some kind of affection for me.”

“...” He wanted to talk, even if he did it with sobs and screams, he had to answer him.

“Till, I can't live without you, but you can live without me. No, you have to live without me. You can live hating me if it's easier for you—” He was interrupted.

“You're wrong!” Till was gasping for air, as if he'd broken some seal that wasn't allowing him to speak a moment ago. “You're an idiot, Ivan, if you think dying will make me hate you. Live if you want me to hate you! Live even if I die, damn it!”

“...But Till, nothing can change what already happened.”

Before Till's eyes, the man who had been standing before him without any injuries was now lying face up in a pool of his own blood. He was bleeding, but still able to speak.

“So hate me and let me go.”

“No! Ivan!”

Till knelt before him, but there was nothing he could do as guards quickly moved in from all sides. Some took Ivan, others took Till.

Till began to struggle, but Ivan wasn't moving. He managed to free himself and quickly crawled toward him, but as soon as he grabbed Ivan's coat, the guards managed to grab him again.

However, even though it was only his hand that gripped Ivan's clothes, he wouldn't let go. Till continued to cry and plead, but Ivan never opened his eyes again.

The guards tried to separate them with such force that they even began to leave marks on Till.

It was in the midst of his sobs that Till finally woke up.

He felt disoriented. As if the place he was in now was the real dream, and his mind clearly wasn't in the best condition.

Even though he was asleep in Ivan's arms, he couldn't process that it was really him. Because to some extent, he wasn't.

The sun hadn't risen yet, but Till got out of bed and left the room as best he could, even though he already felt terrible.

That's how he ended the way Ivan found him some time later, when he could no longer stand.

There were some knocks on the front door, which Ivan was quick to answer, even though he was reluctant to leave Till's side, even for a second.

He had told him that he had had a nightmare, but he did not specify what he had seen in it.

When he opened the door, he found Hyuna accompanying Luka this time.

They both went inside, and without Ivan noticing, Hyuna went straight to check on Till.

“Here's what you asked for. I even asked for the instructions for the medicine.” Luka handed the pharmacy bag to Ivan.

“Thank you..” He smiled weakly.

“How is he?” Luka asked, also concerned by Ivan's depressed appearance.

He didn't think that just Till getting sick would affect him so much.

“A little better, but I can't get his fever to go down, so I hope the medicine will help.”

Ivan was in the kitchen, pouring a glass of water, and then reading how to administer the medicine.

Luka just nodded, peeking into Till's room.

It seemed that Hyuna had noticed Ivan's concern since she entered, so she went directly to stay by Till's side until Ivan was free.

Although their characters weren't closely linked in the story, Hyuna was naturally empathetic toward him and his current situation. In fact, she understood why Ivan might be so affected by seeing him like that.

“Till, how are you feeling? Does anything hurt or are you uncomfortable?” Hyuna asked.

Till shook his head slowly. It was obvious he still felt bad, but he knew Hyuna was asking that question despite knowing it, so he didn't answer it.

It didn't take long for Ivan to show up.

“Oh, Hyuna, can you help me sit Till up?” He watched how Hyuna nodded quickly.

He put the glass of water and the medicine on the nightstand next to the bed.

Between the two of them, they managed to get Till to sit up in bed, even when the other complained a little.

Ivan then took two pills out of the box and handed them to Till, who just stared at them.

“They're for your fever. Take them.”

Till turned to look at Ivan, somewhat worried.

“I don't want to.” Till hadn't had much experience with things like that. And it wasn't like he got sick often.

Or at least not to that degree. Or to any degree. It was actually very strange.

“You probably don't like them, but you have to take them if you want to get better.” Ivan didn't want to force him.

Till refused to open his mouth.

Oddly, this reminded him of when he had to wrap him in the blanket because he kept running away from him.

“Hyuna.”

“Yes?” Hyuna was somewhat surprised by Ivan's serious tone.

“Hold him tight.”

She understood what he meant, holding Till's face so he wouldn't move it away, although she didn't have to use that much force since he could barely move.

Ivan, for his part, used one of his hands to open Till's mouth, taking back the pills he had previously given Till from his hand. He carefully tried to push the pills in, taking care of not to make him vomit.

He could feel with the hand that opened his mouth that Till was trying to bite him, with more force than he should have at that moment.

But Ivan finally managed to get him to swallow the pills, not forgetting to hand him the glass of water, which Till angrily drank. He almost threw the empty glass Ivan's face.

“Wow, so even you are capable of doing that kind of thing,” Luka commented from the entrance of the room.

Till hadn't even realized Luka was there, but he didn't have enough strength to fight him now.

“It would probably be best if you spoke to the director about this. If Till fell ill on the very day he was supposed to film the round... I think the director should understand that it's not possible for him to do it. I'm sure she'd accept a slight delay in production until this is resolved.”

Hyuna didn't want to make Till feel like he was making their jobs difficult; she meant well. She wholeheartedly hoped Till would overcome what was hurting him so much, even if she couldn't fully understand his situation.

“Hyuna's right.” Of course, Luka supported the idea. “It's not healthy for him to go through the same thing so soon, even if it's fake. It's cruel, considering it's gotten to the point where it's affecting him physically.”

The three of them turned back to look at Till, who had lain back down and was now sleeping peacefully. The pills seemed to have helped.

Ivan sighed.

“Okay, I'm going to go see her. Please take care of him for a moment, I'll be right back.”

No matter how hard it was, he had to do it. It wouldn't solve anything if he just called her, even though he knew the director wouldn't be so cruel to someone who was obviously unstable.

Ivan left the apartment, heading to the set.

Chapter Text

Everything was dark. There was nothing around him to let him know where he was. He felt like he was walking aimlessly for a long time, until a light appeared in the distance that made him keep going.

Was it the end of his sweet dream?

He prayed to the Great Anakt that it would not be so.

As he approached, the light enveloped him and blinded him, but he continued forward. 

It was then that he could finally see what was on the other side.

He could recognize that he was on the set, but some things were different. For example, besides Ivan, who he could easily recognize now, there was also Till.

That's right, the Till that the Ivan of his dream knew.

Till stepped back a little, though he soon realized neither of them could see him, as if it were a memory. As if he were seeing something that didn't belong to him.

That made him realize that what he was seeing wasn't real. Otherwise, he'd already be having a very anticipated panic attack.

Though he couldn't say he was safe from that, as he couldn't help but look down at himself, realizing he was wearing the clothes he wished he could have forgotten in such a short time. The ones he wore in Round 6.

It was a vile reminder that he didn't belong there.

Before his thoughts could attack him further, he looked up at the other two, taking in the scene before his eyes.

Ivan seemed to have not noticed "Till" until now, showing a big smile and walking quickly towards him.

“Till!” That smile made Till wish it was directed at him.

Instead, "Till" just turned around to look at him as if it were an everyday occurrence. He couldn't discern anything but tiredness on his face, though he could tell he was trying to hide it.

“Oh, Ivan.”

He didn't seem disinterested in Ivan, but he also didn't seem interested in whatever he was going to say or do. That seemed to be the biggest difference in their personalities, although Till could somewhat understand why that was.

Till had gotten so used to having Ivan around that the idea of ​​seeing him any other day wasn't tempting or exciting. But he had no idea if that was the case for "Till."

“Are you okay? The dark circles under your eyes are a lot more visible than usual.” His tone was the same concerned tone he used with Till. 

“There's so much work today that just thinking about it makes me feel tired. That's all. You don't have to worry about me.” "Till" sighed. “You didn't forget, did you? You have some photo shoots with me from 9 a.m. to 11 a.m., and then we meet with the director for the interviews at 12 p.m. and 3 p.m., also havi—”

He was about to remind Ivan of everything they had to do that day that Ivan had no choice but to interrupt him. Till was grateful for that.

“Yes! I remember. I remember well, Till. You never let your professionalism at home, do you?” Ivan flashed a new, sweet smile at the person who wasn't even looking at him.

But Till did see it. He couldn't tear his gaze away from it. It was so sweet, so full of satisfaction by just being able to talk and be in front of the person who made him smile like that.

Was that how Ivan smiled?

At that thought, the scene in front of him seemed to glitch. The image cutting and fixing itself back, but everything slowly disappeared.

“No! Wait!”

Till tried to stop it, thinking that his screams would be heard by someone, but it was still in vain. 

The image changed in an instant.

Till closed his eyes. He didn't want to face whatever his "memories" wanted to show him.

“Till, Sua hit me..” A soft voice was heard that Till didn't think he would hear again after the years passed.

“What did you do now?” And consequently, he heard another voice he recognized well.

He opened his eyes slowly, finding himself facing the landscape he had loved and hated both at the same time and the moste for so many years.

Anakt Garden.

Now that he looked at it closely, it was all too obvious that it was a lovely cage for the most promising pets. Or at least for those that managed to survive that humiliating confinement disguised as education.

He looked down once more, noticing that he was now wearing the clothes he had worn in Round 2. Clothes that strangely fit the scene somehow.

He turned to where he had heard the voices, and found the young Ivan he knew well, and right next to him, himself.

Both of them seemed to be no more than 13 or 14 years old, when they had not finished growing completely. 

"Till" was sitting on the grass, white sheets of paper scattered around him, each with different music notes that only he could tell the order in which they were played.

Ivan, for his part, stood in front of him, tears in his eyes, though he was still smiling. He touched his head even though Till knew the blow wouldn't have hurt much if it had come from Sua.

“You know how she is. It wasn't my fault.” He excused.

“Knowing you, I'm sure it was.” Even though he answered with certainty, "Till" didn't turn to look at him.

He was quite focused on the pages in front of him. His fingers moved as if guided by the notes, as if he really had an instrument in his hand.

“Till...” Ivan whined when he saw that the other wasn't really interested in what he had to say.

Till had never noticed until now that Ivan only allowed himself to act like a child when he was with him. Only with him did he allow himself to be himself, and it went both ways.

He allowed himself to ignore him because he knew the other wouldn't take it badly.

Every single thing he saw made him hate every version of himself. Every version that took for granted that Ivan would always be there for him.

But what stopped him was that he felt someone walk past him. When he turned around, he saw that Ivan was actually crying, while "Till" was wiping his tears with his sleeves.

“Come on, it couldn't have hurt that much, could it?” His tone was soft and concerned. 

Ivan didn't usually cry, but now he seemed more affected than usual. And "Till" couldn't continue feigning disinterest when he saw him in that state.

“No, but, Till... I never wanted to leave you alone.”

Strangely, Till could tell that those words weren't directed at the little Till, but at him. Even more so because Ivan stared at him through his tears.

He felt a chill run through his body before a light blinded him. And when he opened his eyes, the scene had changed again.

That reddish starry night was something that haunted him no matter where he went, and even if he tried, he couldn't forget the momentary happiness he felt at being free, even for such a short period of time.

And deep down, he felt guilty for being the reason Ivan decided to stay in that horrible cage with him.

“You feel so guilty, but what about me? Shouldn't I beg for your forgiveness over and over again until I lose my voice?” Beneath that crimson sky, Till spoke.

In front of him, at a considerable distance, stood the ever-smiling Ivan, wearing the clothes they'd worn the day they almost escaped. Till was no exception. Not even the collar was missing from his appearance. 

“Of course not. I'll never accept your apologies, Till. Of all the humans in this vast universe, only you deserve to be loved. And I only deserve to see over you in silence.”

The wind blew around them, slightly messing up their hair and clothes. Both of their gazes spoke more than anything else they could say. And yet, Ivan decided to add something more.

“That won't change no matter what reality you live in. So it doesn't matter if you never realize it, thank you for being the victim of my emotions.”

On Ivan's side, it seemed like there was no problem.

“Well, that's a problem,” said the director.

It seemed.

“You're the director. Shouldn't you have some kind of say over it?” Ivan asked.

He knew something like this was going to happen.

Although the recordings themselves did not take as long as the animated project, everything was strictly controlled and planned by the director and co-director.

And thanks to the project's growing popularity, there was always something to do even when it wasn't filming season.

“I don't mean I can't delay the recordings. More like... I need to think of some excuse that will work so it doesn't interfere with Till's work and that no one will be interested in bothering him in the meantime.” As creative as she could be, nothing came to mind. 

“So it can't be an announcement of sickness or absence at all...” Meng seemed to be thinking it over until she had an idea. “I know. How about announcing that in order to take care of our actors' health, we've decided to have them go on a trip? However, to prevent fans from becoming suspicious or intruding, the actors will be blogging about their trip. The location will not be revealed, and any fans who violate this privacy policy will be prosecuted accordingly.”

“True. It's what other projects usually do to help their actors get to know each other better.” The director seemed excited by the idea. “You've all been working together for two years now, but you've never done anything like this, so I don't see why not. I'm sure the fans would like to know more about you, even if it's just to delay filming a bit.”

“It's not a bad idea, but I really doubt the fans will respect the privacy of the location.” Ivan didn't seem very convinced.

“Many will, for their own good, but the few who don't will have to keep in mind that there's a legal line they can't cross. Of course, you won't be completely alone. Some of the filming and security team have to accompany you so that legal line can come into play. Otherwise, it would just be you leaving aside your responsibilities.” The co-director seemed to have everything well thought out.

“Don't worry, Ivan. Meng and I will do everything possible to help our beloved actors. It's simply our job as directors of this project.” Vivinos smiled gently.

It was a smile that said everything was going to be okay.

“It seems like he's having a nightmare...”

Hyuna was sitting on the edge of Till's bed, wiping his face of the sweat that appeared from time to time.

His fever had gone down a while ago, but Till was still asleep. He grimaced in pain sometimes, so Hyuna thought he might still be in some discomfort, but now she wasn't so sure.

For his part, Luka was sitting in a chair, a little far from the bed but not too far from Hyuna. He looked at Till with concern, but there wasn't much he could do.

“It's most likely. After all, he's the "real" Till.” Hyuna turned to look at him, and Luka continued. “From what I could find out about him, his mind seems to be that of the character, but even if Alien Stage talks about the impossible, that doesn't mean it's actually possible.”

What Luka meant was that in that reality, there was no way for a character, or their consciousness, to change reality simply because something was overwhelming them. It was absolutely impossible.

“Well, yes, but what other explanation is there? There's so much we humans don't know about the universe. Is it really impossible for something as crazy as a life-or-death competition to exist in a place parallel to ours?” Her smile was somewhat sad.

Hyuna was naturally positive and friendly, and although many said she didn't know much about the world, she did her best to learn about it. But above all, her empathy was her entire being, so while she couldn't say she'd experienced what many had, she could say she truly understood them.

And in this case, because she's working on the same project as Till, she can say that what he was going through was painful, and she didn't want to make it seem like something small or annoying.

Luka noticed her smile, and although he didn't fully agree with the question Hyuna had asked, he wasn't going to argue right now.

“I wonder how Ivan is doing?” He tried to change the conversation.

“Me too. It's been several hours since he left. He seemed more concerned about Till than watching where he was going.” Hyuna giggled as she wiped Till's face again.

“He didn't get run over, did he? That idiot. He doesn't even realize how he acts.” There was a slight smile on Luka's face.

“Come on, you were the same!”

“What— Don't compare me to him. I knew exactly how I felt. The fact that I didn't tell you was something else...” Luka murmured.

Hyuna couldn't hold back her laughter any longer.

“Oh my God! I wish I could relive that moment. You were so flustered, and it was so sweet when you asked me to be your girlfriend.” Saying that, Hyuna blushed a little.

“Enough..” Luka blushed too, sliding slightly in his chair while covering his face. “I also can't forget it because Hyun-Woo chased me during all my scenes that day... It was horrible.”

It gave him the chills just remembering it, although it should have been a nice memory since it was the day they both officially became a couple.

Luka and Hyuna had been dating for about a year, and they had no plans to break up anytime soon. Although they had their ups and downs, they were both truly happy to have found a partner who was just like the other.

Chapter Text

Ivan arrived at Till's apartment after what seemed like an eternity. In reality, he'd been gone so long that the sun was only a few hours away from setting again.

During that time, Hyuna and Luka continued to care for Till as best as they could, and he eventually woke up.

And right now, the weirdest thing the three of them would ever see in their lives was happening.

Ivan announced his arrival as he walked towards Till's room, but stopped dead in his tracks when he heard Hyuna and Luka's voices.

“Till, wait!” It was Hyuna.

“You can't get up yet, let him come here instead.” It was Luka.

However, it seemed that this had not convinced Till, as he ran out of the room as best he could, straight towards Ivan.

Of course, just like Luka had said, Till wasn't in any condition to get up even after getting sick. He didn't have enough strength.

Till tripped over his own feet just before reaching Ivan, colliding with him rather roughly. Still, Ivan could feel through his clothes how tightly Till was clinging to him, and not exactly to try to keep himself from falling completely to the ground.

“Come on, I told you you couldn't get up..” Luka scolded him.

He tried to pull him away from Ivan, but he seemed like a little boy clinging to his mother the first time he was dropped off at kindergarten. At least that's how Ivan and Luka could compare it.

“Let me go!” Till shouted, though not as loudly as he normally would.

However, Luka ignored him and kept trying.

“Luka, it's okay,” Ivan assured, holding Till in a hug.

Only in this way did Luka stop trying to separate him from Ivan.

It wasn't that he didn't want them together, but rather that he was worried about Till, since he wasn't in any condition to get out of bed on his own. He just sighed at that.

Luka and Hyuna looked at each other and decided they should give them some space, so they went back to the bedroom while Ivan and Till stayed in the living room.

“Till? How are you feeling?” Ivan whispered, loud enough for Till to hear.

“...Who knows.” It was a very vague answer, so Ivan was confused.

Fortunately, it had all been a dream, but every scene was vivid in his mind. He'd rather ignore the fact that he was living someone else's life than accept that he didn't belong. If he did, he feared he'd break even more.

The only important thing now was that Ivan was with him. 

As soon as he woke up, he'd been confused for a while, until he remembered where he was. He looked around for Ivan, and when he couldn't find him, he'd tried to get out of bed just like he had just done, but at that time Hyuna and Luka had actually caught him.

And even though they assured him that Ivan would return, Till didn't know if he could trust their words. Unfortunately, both were people he hadn't fully known in his own reality, and one of them had a reputation built on lies there, so Till couldn't even consider his opinion.

Since he didn't have enough strength to free himself from them at that moment, he decided to wait a little longer. And eventually, Ivan arrived. At least that made him trust the other two's words a little more.

What brought him out of his thoughts was Ivan's hand on his forehead.

“Your fever is gone, that's good.” Ivan smiled at him.

Great. He was just discovering he had a soft spot for that smile.

“Where did you go?” Till asked, though he was hiding his face against Ivan's shoulder.

“Oh, I went to see the director. Fortunately, they were able to arrange an alternative so you wouldn't have to record Round 6 yet. So you don't have to worry about that anymore, Till.”

Ivan began to stroke Till's hair slowly, being attentive in case the other expressed any displeasure at the action.

“Idiot,” Till blurted out.

“Huh?” Ivan was confused.

“Seriously, why do you keep thinking about me when all I do is make you suffer?” He whispered.

Ivan shook his head as he continued to shower him with affection.

“You're the one who seems to have suffered more than me. It's only fair that I think of you when you can't even think of yourself right now.”

Suffering is a two-way street. No one can hurt anyone without hurting themselves too. That was something Ivan understood.

He picked Till up and carried him to the sofa. Only then did he get Till to move slightly away from him, finally seeing his face.

He looked tired. And Ivan couldn't help but run his hands over his cheeks. A gesture he knew would comfort Till, even a little.

“You're still an idiot...” Even though he said that, there was a slight smile on Till's face.

“That's what they said, basically.”

Hyuna, Luka, and Till were sitting in the living room while Ivan stood in front of them, at a considerable distance.

After everything had happened, Hyuna and Luka finally showed up, and Ivan was quick to tell them what the directors had decided.

“A trip?” Luka asked.

“That's a great idea! It would really help everyone clear their minds a little, especially Till,” Hyuna commented.

Till didn't seem particularly excited or thrilled by the idea. In fact, he suspected they were trying to kidnap him for some reason.

Before Alien Stage, during the time Till had to live full-time with Urak, it hadn't been uncommon for the occasional alien to try to kidnap him, even though his visuals were poor. However, Till considered himself smart enough to not to have fallen into any traps during that time. 

It wasn't that he preferred his owner, but he couldn't say whoever kidnapped him would be better than him. It was doubtful, and Urak tended to leave him abandoned most of the time if he wasn't interested in showing him off.

But back to the topic.

“How do I know this isn't a trap?” Till spoke, one of his hands in the air as if he was asking permission to speak.

“Why would it be a trap? All of this is being done for your well-being. I don't see why it would be any kind of trap,” Luka replied.

Surprisingly, Till didn't answer in a bad way, but with the usual caution with which he had asked the question before.

“Because I find it suspicious that only the actors and "some" others go on this trip. I can accept the blogging part because it's supposed to be, and I believe it's, my job.”

“Get to the point.”

“I don't want to go with you.”

Everyone fell silent at that.

No one had any idea what one thing had to do with the other, but apparently Till couldn't hold back from throwing a passive agressive comment at Luka any longer.

“I thought you two would start getting along after what happened,” Ivan said, trying to keep a calm expression and not laugh.

“I tried to get them to get along, but Till's distrust of Luka and Luka's bounce back at Till's comments aren't a good combination.” Hyuna was also trying not to burst out laughing, although she did have a small smile on her face.

Luka's "bounce" meant he couldn't help but respond in kind to anyone who used a rude or aggressive tone toward him. Strangely, it also made itself present with the specific gesture Till loved to use against the Aliens.

Ivan coughed to hide the laughter that threatened to burst out once and for all.

“Till, if you're really unsure about this, I can also ask the minis to join us on the trip. Having your brother around might make you feel a little more secure in an unfamiliar place.”

“If you put it that way...” Till seemed to think about it.

He didn't know if he would feel safer or more worried if his brother or any of the other minis went with them.

“You can think about it, but the trip itself can't be canceled. Otherwise, you'll have to start filming Round 6 first thing tomorrow morning to make up for the scenes you didn't film today, even if you were sick,” Luka said, though it sounded more like a threat.

Hyuna had to put her hand on Luka's head to calm him down. She could tell he still hadn't gotten over Till's "I don't want to go with you."

Till seemed to think about it, but in the end, he didn't really have much choice. So he just nodded in agreement with what Ivan had said.

“Then everything's settled. The director might be in touch with them, but Hyuna, could you confirm with Mizi and Sua too?” Ivan asked.

“No problem, Ivany.” With that, she took out her phone to text them both.

The nickname did not go unnoticed by Till.

“Ivany?”

Hyuna looked up at him, smiling.

“It's my nickname for him. Mizi sometimes calls him Navi, and Hyun-Woo sometimes calls him Ivi. I wanted to have a special name for him too.” She looked back at her phone. “After all, Ivan is really a nice person to everyone.”

Hyuna spoke with affection, and although her words didn't offend anyone, Till's mind was an expert at distorting reality.

Again, an unpleasant feeling, which Till did not want to accept, appeared.

“Ivan, Ivany, Navi, Ivi.” Till repeated in a whisper. “Ah, it's unpleasant,” he blurted out without explanation.

He hadn't been referring to the names, but rather to the growing feeling inside him. But this was one of those times where he didn't mean what he said and ended up saying something he didn't mean.

Everyone fell silent again, now out of discomfort.

What broke it was the sound of Hyuna's phone receiving a message.

“Oh, Mizi says she knows and can't wait to see us all together again...”

It was really uncomfortable.

Ivan and Till were having dinner. It was late, so Luka and Hyuna didn't want to stay any longer, and they left shortly before nightfall.

Till had slowly realized his mistake when not even Hyuna could save the conversation from that awkward silence. Now he felt guilty.

“I didn't mean it like that. I didn't mean the nicknames. Honestly.” He said, looking down at his food.

Instead of letting what Till had said go, he decided to look into it.

“What did you mean then?”

“I just...” He didn't want to admit it, but he didn't want to lie to him. “Sometimes, there's a very unpleasant feeling inside me when others... talk about you, as if they knew you more or better than I do.”

It was true that everyone knew Ivan better than he did in that reality, but he couldn't shake the feeling anyway.

Ivan understood what he meant when he said it was "unpleasant" after mentioning the names, and above all, he understood that Till could be jealous of others without realizing it.

“I see. But if it helps, Till, remember that there's a me only you know, and no one knows him better than you. He's still a part of me even if I don't have those memories.”

‘He's still a part of me.’

Yes, maybe that was it.

Maybe Till was also a part of himself that for some reason ended up in the wrong reality.