Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"Oh my god! You didn't!"

The classroom echoed with laughter, especially from the group of social, popular girls. The sound always had a way of making your eye twitch, though you knew it wasn't their fault. You often found yourself making the mistake of attributing your isolation to others, but deep down, you knew the truth. It wasn't anyone else's fault that you were this way. It simply was.

"Alright, times up. Where's my 100 yen?" 

You turned around and sighed, rolling your eyes in irritation. It was sad and pathetic what men would do these days to get an ounce of attention, you thought to yourself. You didn't know if he was letting them sit on him because he was a pervert, or just desperate for money and attention.

"Pay up!" 

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The bell rang, signaling the start of the lunch break. You adjusted your uncomfortable uniform and stepped outside. A few girls here and there chuckled and whispered, about you probably, but it was fine. You were okay with it. You were better off as their enemy than their friend.

You hid behind a wall where nobody passed by as you took your cigarettes out from your pocket. You used to be cautious about smoking, but you didn't care anymore. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered. You chuckled to yourself about how much you sounded like an edgy teenager, well, you were. 

"Hey, can I have the last few drags?" 

You were abruptly torn out of your thoughts and brought back to reality. It was the boy from your class, the one letting girls sit on him for a few yen, Denji. He probably didn't even know your name, you assumed. 

"What?" You laughed. "I can just give you a whole one, it's no problem." You held your cigarette between your teeth, retrieving the pack and offering it to Denji.

"Really? Sweet!" The boy exclaimed, his voice brimming with excitement as he took one out. You pulled out a lighter and flicked it to life in front of him, only for him to shake his head.

"No thanks, it's not for me."

Your eyebrows twitched. "Then who's it for? You're not gonna... tell on me, are you?" 

You swallowed hard, your mind racing with the worst possibilities, your future reduced to sweeping the streets to earn a single penny a minute. Or worse. Prostitution.

You weren't going to give up on your little brother like that. 

"What? Nah." Denji shook his head. "I'm gonna sell it."

"You're gonna sell a single cigarette?"

He took a plastic bag out of his pocket and revealed a bunch, no, tens of hundreds cigarette butts, smiling proudly.

"Oh my god!" You laughed. "Where did you get these? Are they yours?!" 

"Nah," He said, glancing down with a hint of pride. "I collect these and sell 'em to homeless people. They'll probably end up dead 'cause of me in a few months, but hey, that's just business, right?" 

"Are you insane? Ripping off homeless people?" You were taken aback, crossing your arms in disbelief. "That's... honestly impressive, though." You let out a chuckle. "And smart. Any reason why you're doing it, or...?"

Denji scratched his head, his eyes flickering as he was trying to find the right words, almost debating whether or not he should tell you the truth. 

"I kinda have a... little sister, you can say, at home. Gotta take care of her, y'know?"

You blinked in surprise, his words striking a chord deep within you. A little sister? 

"I know what you mean." you said softly, taking another cigarette and putting it between your teeth as you searched for your lighter. Your voice tingled with unexpected vulnerability. 

"I've got a little brother too. He's all I got." You weren't trying to seem emotional in front of Denji, truly. You weren't going to whine and cry about your hard situation at home, life's tough for everyone. When an animal loses its limb it doesn't spend time depressing over it, it adapts for survival purposes.

Denji was taken aback. "Really?" He said, his surprise evident. "I guess we're in the same boat then, huh?" He turned back and squatted in the corner as he started picking up dried tobacco.

"You don't smoke?" You asked.

"Nah, I don't like the taste." He shrugged, "Knew some people who did, though." His tone went flat, almost dismissive, with a subtle change in his expression. 

"Didn't end well for 'em." He tilted his head, his expression calm and unbothered. "Seems like smokers don't last long around me." 

The smoke got caught in your throat as you inhaled, not expecting that to come out of his mouth. 

"I better be an exception, then." You chuckled at his carelessness. 

"We'll see about that." He giggled, leaning against the wall and looking at you through the corners of his eyes.

You jabbed him with your elbow, letting out a playful laugh. "What did you say?!" You joked, putting a finger up to his face, scolding him.

The both of you laughed, but your moment was cut short by the sudden sound of the bell. You sighed, stamping out your cigarette with a frustrated twist of your foot.

"Well, uh, I better get going." He added, quickly hiding away the bag of tobacco in his pocket

"It was nice meeting you, though, uhh..." 

You laughed, already expecting this.

"We're in the same class!" You stretched your arms outward.

"I knew it! That's why you seemed familiar."

Denji looked at you for a moment, his expression softening.

"Yeah, I guess you're hard to miss," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I, uh, kind of always notice when someone's in the same spot every day." He gave a small, sheepish smile, his gaze shifting away. "Not that I'm paying attention to you or anything, it's just... hard not to notice, right?"

You raised an eyebrow. "...Right." 

You told him your name, amused by the way he fumbled. You knew he didn't remember.

"RIGHT! I knew that." He exclaimed, flashing a lopsided grin and waving as he turned to leave. "Well, see ya around." 

"Yeah, sure you did." You muttered under your breath, watching as he walked off.

He was something else. Rough around the edges, a little crude, but somehow, he was one of the only people in your life who spoke to you like you were real. Like you weren't just another face in the crowd. It was... kind of cute.

He was cute. 

Your face warmed as the thought fully registered and you quickly shook your head, trying to get rid of it. No, that was ridiculous. A bad idea. A really bad idea. You weren't catching feelings. You weren't. 

Besides, he was disgusting. Scamming old people. Yeah. That was it.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

After Denji left, you lingered for a moment, lost in thought. The conversation stirred something in you, something you had buried. 

As you start walking home, the streets blurred and your mind drifted to the past.  

You grew up fast. You had no choice. With no parents to rely on, it was just you and your little brother, pushing and scraping by however you could. 

You remember the late nights spent counting coins, the gnawing hunger that became a dull ache after some point, and the way you learned to be strong for someone who depended on you. You still felt bad, turning to cigarettes and alcohol to soothe the pain, but it was your way of escape. 

Your brother was the only thing keeping you from going mad. His laughter, his innocence, the way he looked up at you like you had all the answers in the world. He didn't know how much blood was on your hands just to keep him safe.

But it didn't matter. As long as he was okay you could endure anything. 

The streets were eerily empty, the usual noise of the city was swallowed by an unnatural silence. A chill ran down your spine, and instinctively you knew you were being watched. 

Before you knew it, the world around you started twisting and blurring. 

The streetlights flickered and distorted, shadows stretching unnaturally along the pavement. A sickening pressure filled the air and pressing against your lungs. You thought this was it. You've lived long enough. 

You suddenly started experiencing flashbacks, flashbacks of your brother, struggling to keep himself up after your death. He only had you, the same way you only had him.

Your vision blurred at the edges. Before you saw. It.

A devil. But not like others.

It wasn't grotesque or monstrous, if anything it's the opposite. Its form was hazy, something your mind your mind struggled to comprehend. The longer you stared, the longer it felt like going into the abyss itself. Something that shouldn't exist. Something that defies understanding.

You couldn’t move, couldn't scream. 

"You are afraid of what you do not know."

The voice wasn't spoken aloud, it bloomed inside your skull, deep and infinite. 

You dropped to your knees, clutching your head. Images flashed through your mind, fractured visions of things that haven't happened yet, memories that aren't yours. 

The voice spoke again, getting quieter each time.

"Then become the unknown."

Agony ripped through you. Your skin burning, your bones cracking, as the world around you fractured. You didn't know if you were screaming, if you were dying, if you were even yourself anymore. 

You felt a violent energy surge through your veins, before everything went black.

Chapter Text

You woke up disoriented, as though days had slipped by unnoticed, in complete silence. 

Not the comforting kind. This silence was wrong, too deep, too heavy, pressing against your skull like a weight you can't shake off.

Your body feels strange. Not in the way it does after a rough night's sleep, but like something inside you has shifted, like you're wearing skin that doesn't quite fit.

You sit up. The alley you collapsed in is gone. Or maybe... you're somewhere else now. The world around you is fragmented, shifting, buildings flicker at the edges, warping between shapes you don't recognize. The air hums with something unnatural.

Then, you hear it.

A voice, but not in your ears. It speaks directly into your mind, coiling around your thoughts like it belongs there.

"Your memories are fractured."

Panic rises in your throat. You scramble to your feet, but the moment you do, the world snaps back. The city is normal again. The buildings are still. The air is cold. Everything looks just as it should.

Except... something's changed.

You glance around, trying to steady your breathing. People walk past you on the street, their faces familiar in the way strangers always are. But something's off.

Nobody is looking at you.

Not in the usual, indifferent way. No side glances, no brief, passing recognition. It's like you're not there at all.

A chill runs down your spine. You take a shaky step forward, brushing against someone's shoulder. They don't react.

Another step. Another.

Nothing.

You ran to the nearest car window you could find to look at yourself, and you were surprised by your reflection. Pale, almost translucent skin, dilated pupils that seemed too large for your eyes and a subtle, flickering distortion around your form, like you were slowly slipping in and out of focus. Other than that, you looked like your usual self. Just... creepier. Like a ghost. 

You tried to calm yourself, focusing on the positives. This was technically what you wanted, dead but alive enough to make ends meet for your brother. Maybe disappearing at will could be useful. If you could control it, slip away when needed, it could help you protect him. But as you looked at your flickering reflection, uncertainty gnawed at you. You weren't in control yet. But you had to be. You will be.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You made it home, your steps heavy as you walked up to where your brother usually sat. But something felt off. He was sitting on the couch, staring blankly at the TV, but his attention seemed to be miles away. You called his name softly at first, then a little louder, your voice echoing in the otherwise quiet room. Still, he didn't respond. This isn't at all what you wanted.

The tightness in your chest started to grow. You waved your hand in front of his face, trying to get him to snap out of whatever daze he was in. But nothing.

He didn't move, didn't react, just kept staring at the screen as if you weren't even there.

You hesitated, feeling a surge of unease creeping in. You stepped closer, your heart racing, and finally, you touched his shoulder. He didn't flinch, didn't even acknowledge your presence.

"Hey... can you hear me?" You tried again, your voice a little more desperate this time.

You ran to your room and collapsed onto your bed, sighing as you stared at the room around you. You took off your suffocating bra, too irritated and lazy to take off your school uniform and laid back for a bit, rethinking everything. Everything was familiar, yet distant, like it wasn't yours anymore. You could see and touch everything, but it didn't matter. Nobody could see you, nobody could touch you.

The sounds of the house were muffled, as if you weren't really there. The ache in your chest grew, a cold reminder that you were slipping further away from everything, even your brother. This wasn't how you imagined surviving. It was like you were already gone.

You stood up, opening the window and lit a cigarette. The first puff left your lungs in a slow exhale, the smoke drifting into the night. It didn't calm the emptiness, but for a moment, it was the only thing that seemed real to you.

You rubbed your temples, almost distracted, when you saw a familiar face out the window.

"Denji?"

The sound of his name escaped your lips before you could stop it. You froze, surprised by the relief that washed over you. What was he doing here? You'd never seen him in this alley before. Or maybe you just hadn't noticed, lost in your own thoughts.

Your heart skipped a beat as you turned slightly, unsure if you should acknowledge him or not.

It didn't hurt to try.

"DENJI!" You yelled, your voice louder than you'd intended, a hint of desperation your voice.

To your surprise, he stopped and turned around, his eyes scanning the alley, confused. He didn't seem to know where the sound had come from, his eyes narrowing as he looked around.

"Who's calling me?" he muttered, still searching.

You hesitated for a moment, wondering if he could really hear you. Would he even notice you now?

Sprinting down the hallway, you threw open the door and jumped, with your hands in the air.

"Denji!" you called again, louder this time.

He stopped, eyes searching, then locked onto you. For the first time in hours, you weren't invisible.

You ran up to him and grabbed him by the shoulders, inching your face closer to his. 

"You can see me?!" You exclaimed, relief flooding your voice.

Denji blinked, clearly caught off guard by your sudden closeness, his expression a mix of confusion and surprise. 

"Huh? Of course I can see you," he said, raising an eyebrow. "Why wouldn't I?"

You stood there, still gripping his shoulders. You were almost convinced your life was over. It didn't make sense. It felt like you'd been fading, like you were slipping through the cracks. Yet here he was, standing in front of you, seeing you as if nothing had changed.

Denji's eyes widened as he took in your appearance, his hands instinctively reaching out to touch your arm, as if confirming you were real. His gaze flickered over you, then quickly snapped back to your face.

"Wait... Holy shit," he said, his voice full of disbelief. "What happened to you?" His fingers brushed against your skin, lingering just for a second.

You froze, glancing down, suddenly aware of your state. Your white uniform clinging to you in a way you hadn't planned. His eyes darted to your chest for a moment before quickly returning to your face, the usual casualness gone from his expression.

"Uhh..." Denji scratched the back of his head, his cheeks flushing slightly. "You, uh... you might wanna... I mean..." His words trailed off, his gaze awkwardly shifting to the side. "It's just... you're, uh... showing more than I think you intended."

You bit your lip, feeling the heat rise to your face as you looked down, realizing what had happened. The awkwardness lingered in the air, and though Denji's expression remained a mix of surprise and embarrassment, there was something else there. A subtle shift in the way he was looking at you.

"Shit! I forgot," you muttered, realizing too late what you'd done. You had completely forgotten you took off your bra earlier at home. How could you forget something so fundamental? Probably from the excitement that someone had noticed you. You even jumped earlier, your translucent uniform doing nothing to hide it. You buried your face in your palms, rubbing it in embarrassment as heat continued creeping up your cheeks.

Denji's eyes practically popped out of his head as he caught sight of you. He grinned, clearly unable to resist taking in the full view. His gaze flickered down before quickly snapping back to your face, but there was a noticeable glint in his eyes.

"If you're going to stare, at least don't make it obvious" You looked up at him awkwardly, crossing your arms to shield yourself. 

But it's like he didn't even hear you.

"Denji...?" You snapped your fingers in front of his face. "My eyes are up here." 

"Yeah... Yeah!" He snapped back into consciousness, shaking his head like a dog.

"Anyway, i don't know what's happened to me. One moment i was walking down the street and next thing i know, everything around me starts blurring and turning into a haze." You clutched your head, trying to ease your mind.

Denji's expression shifted, not with confusion. It was something else. Something like recognition. 

"What? Why are you making that face? I don't like that face," You uttered loudly in panic, your voice unsteady. 

"Hey! Are you saying you don't like my face?" Denji put a hand to his chest. 

You shot him a panicked glare, your mind scrambling to rearrange your words to come up with some kind of answer.

Of course you liked his face.

Before you could respond, as if the devil himself were watching over you, the street lights began to flicker erratically. Then, in an instant, they cut out completely, plunging the street into suffocating darkness. 

A chill ran down your spine. You stumbled back, your body colliding with Denji. 

A monstrous figure slipped out of the shadows, its body an ominous mess of limbs and gaping mouths. The air turned thick with the stench of rot.

"Holy shit!" You yelled out in panic. 

"Aww man," Denji groaned, cracking his neck. "Right when I was about to drop a killer pickup line." 

You opened your mouth, speechless, just a sharp inhale.

"Denji!" You yelled out in disbelief. How was he so calm about all of this?

The devil lunged. Fast.

Denji shoved you back, his body moving with a frantic energy, and then, erupting a... chainsaw?! A chainsaw?! As in the chainsaw man?! DENJI?!

Your eyes widened in disbelief as the monstrous, reviving chainsaw tore through the air, a brutal reminder of who Denji was.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" You yelled at the top of your lungs. But quickly shook your head. Now's not the time to think about this. Where was your survival instinct?

The devil completely ignored Denji, violently shoving him aside like he was nothing. Denji stumbled, crashing into a nearby building with a heavy thud, but before he could regain himself, the devil's focus was already back on you.

The devil lunged.

And it went straight through you.

Your body reacted before your mind could. A pulse surged through you, foreign yet instinctive. The space around you rippled, like reality itself was bending at your will. 

You disappeared.

The devil snarled, its massive limbs searching blindly. You took a slow, measured step, and the world itself seemed to fracture beneath your foot.

Then, without warning, you reappeared behind it.

The devil stiffened, its body seizing up. It saw something. Something impossible.

A glimpse into the future.

Its own death.

A false future. One where it was already dead.

The creature let out a horrifying, guttural scream. It believed it was dying. It could feel its body being torn apart, even though it was still standing.

Its creeks were distorted. Then, with one final shriek, the devil collapsed, its form crumbling into dust, erased by its own belief in a doomed fate.

A dead silence quickly filled the scene. 

You wiped the sweat off your forehead, closing your eyes to regain your breath.

"Didn't think you had it in you." Denji's voice came from behind, making you jolt. Your body tensed up for a split second.

He was covered in blood, his shirt torn to pieces, revealing scrapes and bruises underneath. But what stood out the most was the familiar chainsaw cord jutting from his chest. Undeniable proof.

"Relax, geez. You're all jumpy." He chuckled, stepping beside you and completely unfazed by the battle that just unfolded. 

"This is how I find out you're chainsaw man?" You interrupted him, breathlessly, resting your palms on your knees as you tried to steady yourself. Your gaze flicked up at him from below. "Was your plan dropping that bomb on me mid-fight?"

Denji blinked and scratched the back of his head with a lopsided grin.

"Uhh... surprise?"

Something wasn't right. There's no way chainsaw man would just reveal himself to me, a girl he's known for a few days. It didn't add up.

"How do I know you're really him?" You asked. "Isn't chainsaw man supposed to keep his identity a secret from normal people?"

Denji grinned, as if his body wasn't torn to shreds moments ago. "Guess that means I don't think you're normal, huh?" 

"I'll take that as a compliment." You straightened yourself. "Won't you get in trouble, though?!"

Denji grinned, unbothered. "Most likely. Yes." He smirked widened. "Believe it or not, I wanna be found out."

You stared at him, stunned. "You- what? Isn't that super dangerous? I mean... as if I would know anything about it."

He shrugged, as if the idea of getting hunted down didn't faze him in the slightest. "Dunno. Just think it'd be kinda cool. Imagine how many babes would be all over me if they knew I was chainsaw man."

You blinked in confusion and let out a long, exhausted sigh.

"You know what? I'm not even gonna bother asking anymore." You turned away, rubbing your temples, annoyed.

I don't understand what any of this means. I still didn't get my answer." You blinked, locking your eyes with his. "I'm not made for fighting. What even am I?"

"Hell if I know," He finally said, exhaling sharply. "But judging from my experience, I'd say you're a hybrid."

His eyes drifted towards the distance. "Something like, half-devil, half-human sort of thing. Same as me."

"Also, that was kind of badass. I've never seen anyone take down a devil that quickly. I'm not even going to ask how you did it." He stretched his arms, lifting them above his head above his head. "You're built for this, wether you believe it or not."

You blushed at his compliments, rubbing your neck. 

"That doesn't make sense." You murmured. "But, I was normal before today. No weird powers, no devil in my head. Nothing."

"Do you remember anything distinctive about today? Before you, like, got your powers and shit?"

Denji exclaimed.

"I... I remember feeling a tight pressure on my chest. And collapsing."

"Hmm..." Denji rubbed his chin. "You made a contract." He said, surprisingly calmly.

"A what?! I didn't make anything with anyone." You said defensively, even more confused than before. "What the hell does that mean?"

"A contract. It's what happens when a devil and a human make a deal. Usually, the human offers something up. Blood, a body part, even their life, in exchange for the devil's power. But in your case..." He tilted his head, studying you. "I guess you didn't made that deal on purpose."

Your stomach twisted. "What do you mean?"

Denji leaned down and sat on the ground, looking up at the sky, his arms on the ground to support his weight. "Sometimes, when a person's about to die, like really about to kick the bucket, a devil can slip in and make a contract with 'em. If you were seconds away from, like, a heart attack, your body might've just... taken the deal without you even realizing it."

Your breath got caught in your throat. "You're saying I subconsciously made a contract?"

Denji nodded. "Yeah. You didn't know what was happening, but this devil must've offered you a way out. And you took it."

You swallowed hard. The thought of something creeping into your mind, making a deal for your life without you even knowing, it made your skin crawl.

"But what did I give up?" you murmured, almost afraid to ask. "If a contract always comes with a price, what did it take from me?"

Denji's grin faded slightly. He didn't have an answer.

You'd probably find out soon enough.

"I can't take it anymore. Too many things happened in a single day." You sat down beside him, curling your legs towards you and resting your head on your knees. “You’ll get used to it.” Denji replied.

A comfortable silence consumed you. Not the awkward kind, like the quiet after the storm. Words wouldn't change the fact that you were different now, that something had been taken from you. That something, well, you're yet to find out.

"Fyi, I do like your face." 

Before Denji could react, you leaned in, pressing a quick, soft kiss to his cheek. It was barely more than a brush of your lips, but to you, it felt like an earth shattering move. 

He was the only one patient with you. Never interrupting you while talking and actually listening to what you have to say. 

Denji froze, his hand rose to touch the spot where your lips have been. 

"If that's your way of saying 'thanks' I'm saving you more often."

Chapter Text

"Hey! Pssst!"

You jolted awake, gasping for air as your eyes rapidly searched your bedroom. Faint echoes of your brother's laughter lingered in your ears, distant and unnervingly real.

It was well past midnight. You had crashed out the second your head hit the pillow, probably due to the exhaustion from the previous day.

You hurried through the hallway to the living room, pulse hammering in your ears. You sighed loudly, relieved to see him peacefully asleep on the couch, the faint hum of static filling the dim room.

Just a dream, you told yourself, exhaling shakily. You gently draped a blanket over him and switched off the TV, the screen flickering to black. You kissed him on the forehead and slowly started walking back to your room.

Your heart shouldn't be racing like this over nothing.

"HELP ME!"

You frantically turned around in the hallway, hearing your brother's terrorizing scream echo in your ears, the sound bouncing off the walls like it was coming from everywhere at once. Every inch of your body coated in sweat, the hairs on the back of your neck standing on end.

You breathed loudly, calling out his name to no response. You started walking backwards to your room, keeping an eye out and firmly closing the door.

It was probably your twisted mind playing tricks on you. It's nothing. Truly. He was sound asleep, you saw him with your own eyes.

You sat down on your bed, rubbing your forehead before you stiffly laid down.

Hearing giggles again, you frantically jerked up and covered your mouth in shock, hands shaking uncontrollably.

Your brother, his small hands grasping at something unseen, his face contorted in pure terror. The image flickered, glitching like a broken screen, then vanishing into the darkness as big tentacles came out of the wall and wrapped around his small body.

"NO!" You let out a guttural scream and reached out for him, only for him to turn around, his face twisted in a mocking smile, before the tentacles started pulling him through the wall. His eerie, childish giggles echoed around you, growing fainter, until they faded entirely.

That wasn't a memory. That wasn't a dream.

Shivers crawled up your spine as you pressed a trembling hand against your chest, trying to ground yourself.

Maybe it was just a nightmare, or maybe it was something else.

A vision.

You didn't want to finish that thought. You squeezed your eyes shut and forced yourself to lie back down. But no matter how hard you tried, sleep never came.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You didn't end up sleeping. At all.

Your mind was empty as you walked through the halls of the school, the annoying lights buzzing over your head like a swarm of wasps. Your body ached, your head felt like it was filled with static, your hands shaking. You didn't know if it was from the vision or the fact that you got zero sleep. 

You still had no clue what this whole "contract" or "devil" business really meant, let alone how to use it. You had no experience with devils, no frame of reference for what you were supposed to do. Just thinking about it made your head throb. 

If you had to guess, based on the words it kept repeating, the it's name was "the Unknown Devil" or that kind of sort.

"Become the unknown." It echoed in your mind, haunting and cryptic. You weren't sure if that was its name or just a warning, but you had no other explanation.

You slid into your seat, letting your forehead hit the desk. Just survive the day, you thought.

"BOO!"

You jolted, the blunt jab to your ribs making you gasp in surprise. "Ah! Denji! I swear to god-"

"Woah, you look like hell," He interrupted, leaning forward and resting his palms on the edge of the table.

"Thanks, thats exactly what a girl wants to hear." You said sarcastically, scratching your head. "I had a terrible night, my-"

You stopped talking and glanced sideways at him, his uniform a mess, tie missing, buttons uneven, and he was chewing on a pencil like it was some kind of snack.

You squinted. "Are you eating that?"

Denji glanced down, eyes half-lidded, as he bit down harder. "Dunno. Maybe."

A long pause lingered, and you just stared at him. He stared back, chewing with an oddly calm expression.

You sighed, exasperated, and reached over to yank the pencil out of his mouth. "You're gonna get lead poisoning."

Denji didn't miss a beat, making a half-hearted grab for it. "Nah, I read somewhere that's a myth."

You raised an eyebrow and giggled. "You can't read."

"Rude."

Denji pulled the pencil from his mouth and before you could react he shoved it into yours, letting out a laugh.

"Blegh- what the hell?!" You recoiled, yanking it out and wiping your tongue on your sleeve. 

Two could play at that game.

Without hesitation, you snatched the pencil again and threw it across the classroom. It clattered against the dirty floor near the window, far from his reach.

"I bet you'll never put that thing in your mouth again," You said proudly, folding your arms.

Denji grinned. "Think again."

He got up, strolled over to where the pencil had landed, and casually picked it up. Without breaking eye contact, he shoved it right back into his mouth before plopping back into his seat. Just in time as the teacher walked in.

"Ew..." You muttered under your breath, your mouth slightly open in disbelief.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"Are we there yet?!"

"Yes, yes, just a few more minutes." you replied calmly.

"I swear, you said that ten minutes ago!"

You chuckled. "You're lucky I even agreed to bring you here."

You held your brother's hand as you made your way to the arcade, his small fingers squeezing yours with excitement. You didn't particularly want go, but the last thing you wanted was to take away pieces of his childhood just because you weren't in the mood. After all, you were once just a kid begging to go to the arcade.

Neon lights flickered overhead as you and your little brother made your way inside, the sounds of the machines and upbeat music filling the air. Your brother had been begging you all week to come, and after the chaos of last night, you figured it might do you both some good to spend some time together. Maybe the bright lights would help clear your mind.

You handed your brother some coins and turned to step outside for a cigarette when you saw... 

Denji across the arcade? It seemed like everywhere you turned your head, he was there. 

He was actually... well-dressed. His usual messy look swapped out for a formal one, his hair less wild than usual. He was standing there, looking at his watch. 

Your heart fluttered at the sight of him, and for a moment, you almost moved toward him without thinking.

In an instant, your thoughts froze. Wait.

Why was he dressed like that? Was he waiting for someone?

Was he on a date?

The thought hit you like a punch in the stomach, and your mood soured in an instant. Without a word, you quickly turned and made your way outside, lighting a cigarette and accidentally burning your hand in the process as you tried to push the thought out of your mind.

"Ouch..." You whispered, flinching as you glanced down at the burn on your hand. 

You flicked the cigarette to the ground after finishing it, watching it burn briefly before extinguishing. With a deep sigh, you pulled your leather jacket tighter around you, wishing you could just forget about the gnawing feeling in your chest.

But it was hard. The image of Denji, standing there, looking so... different... kept playing in your mind. You couldn't shake it.

"Hey?"

You jumped. Denji stood in front of you, looking slightly awkward, his usual grin replaced by a more subdued expression.

"Whatcha doin' here?" Denji asked, his grin replaced by a shuddered expression. "You stalking me?"

"What?! N-no!" You stuttered, defensive. You really weren't. "I'm here for my brother. Just keeping an eye on him." You gestured sideways with your head towards the arcane. 

Denji raised an eyebrow and pointed to a group of kids fighting over a pile of coins. "That your little brother over there?" You could even hear their muffled voices from outside. 

"Shit... yeah," you muttered, watching the chaos unfold. "Guess I'm not doing a great job, huh?" You shrugged, giggling to yourself to hide the frustration creeping up on you while you took another cigarette from the pack. 

You counted how much you had left and seriously considered picking some butts off the ground, as you really didn't have enough money for more. 

You wiped your runny nose, feeling the chill in the air as the cold seeped through your thin outfit. A medium-length skirt, tight shirt, and a thin leather jacket, definitely not ideal for this weather.

You shivered slightly, pulling your jacket tighter around you, wishing you'd thought more about the temperature before leaving.

You tried to keep your voice steady, but it came out quieter than you'd intended. "Anyways, what's up with the... nice outfit?"

Denji blinked, looking down at himself before shrugging. "What? You don't think I can clean up?"

You didn't answer right away, your eyes narrowing as you tried to figure out what he was doing here. Was he really here to meet someone?

"I guess not," you said, poking his shoulder, still hoping he'd spill more.

Denji hesitated, then shrugged. "I can't really tell you. Yoshida almost broke my arm after finding out you know my secret."

You blinked in surprise. "Yoshi-who? Secret? That you're chainsaw man?"

"Yeah. But, I'm not complaining. Not one bit." He stretched his arms in the air, his voice straining.

"Well, at least some chick knows i'm chainsaw man." He laughed, completely unbothered.

You paused, unsure how to feel about that. On one hand, chick, really? But on the other, you were the only one who knew his secret. That made you feel... special? Maybe? It was hard to tell.

Now that he mentioned it, you hadn't really thought much about the fact that he was chainsaw man, but now felt like a good time to mess with him. 

You didn't like him for that reason, truly. He was just a simple guy who didn't take anything seriously. But you. He took you seriously.

Wait.

'Liked him?'

Did you finally accept it, or were you just thinking you liked him because he was the only one who's shown you attention in... well, forever?

"Oh, so, I'm just some chick now, huh?" You raised an eyebrow playfully, trying to snap out of your thoughts. The irony obvious in your voice. 

Denji shot you a look, unbothered. "What? You're not a chick?" he replied with a cocky smirk, clearly enjoying your reaction. "I thought it was a compliment."

You rolled your eyes, not sure whether to be annoyed or amused. "Yeah, sure. Real flattering," you muttered.

Denji leaned back on the wall as both of you stared forward and watching the sky, the sun preparing to set. Sky changing colors by the minute.

His eyes glinted mischievously. "You're definitely something more than just some chick."

The casual way he said it made your stomach flip in an unexpected way. You couldn't tell if he was serious or just messing with you, but you felt the heat rush to your face anyway.

"What does that mean?" You tried keeping yourself composed, but your voice betrayed you, cracking up slightly as saliva built up in your mouth. 

Your conversation was interrupted by a loud bash from the entrance door.

"They took all my coins!" Your brother stormed out with tears in his eyes. You immediately flicked your cigarette away.

"Hey there, little guy." Denji greeted him with a grin before you could react, holding out his hand for a high-five. "What's your name?"

Your brother looked up at you, his expression lighting up as he excitedly announced, "Yuto!".

In a whisper that was far from quiet, he leaned toward you, eyes twinkling mischievously.

"Is this your boyfriend?" 

His voice rang loud enough for Denji to hear.

"Yuto!" You yelled out. "I'll give you some more, but don't let them steal from you next time." You hurriedly fished around in your pockets for change.

"And... no. He's a classmate," you stated bluntly, steadying your voice as you tried to keep things casual despite the awkwardness.

Yuto's eyes widened, clearly not buying your words. He glanced between you and Denji. 

You didn't even want to look at his face, he was probably mortified. 

"Why are your cheeks red, then?" Your brother stated honestly, his eyes narrowing in a way that only a younger sibling could manage, completely unaffected by the growing tension. "You like him, you like him!" He started yelling and jumping in circles. 

You froze, heart skipping a beat as you desperately tried to keep your face from turning any redder. Shit. You hadn't even realized you were blushing.

"Oh my god..." You slapped a hand over your face in pure frustration, already dreading whatever chaos he caused. You reached out to grab his hand, but he quickly yanked it away.

Denji's mouth hung open in shock, before he plastered a smile on his face and muttered childishly, "Really?" More-so to himself than to you, though. 

"First of all, my face is red from the cold weather. I'm underdressed." You shrugged, trying to deflect the attention away from your face, crossing your arms. "And second, I here's your coins, go in there before the arcade closes!" You yelled out, gesturing towards the building with your finger.

Denji grinned, not buying it for a second. "Cold weather, huh?"

"Shut up." You rolled your eyes. 

Your brother, being the kid he is, ran back inside, slamming the door behind him with a loud bang again. 

The moment of awkward tension was broken, and you let out a sigh of relief, your face still burning slightly from the exchange with Denji.

"Just a classmate?" Denji acted sad, placing a hand dramatically over his chest. "Do you let all of your classmates see your body through a translucent shirt?" Denji bit back, a sly grin forming on his lips. 

He was referring to your fight with the devil the previous day.

"OH, COME ON!" You threw your hands up in frustration. "That was an accident!"

"You kept it like that for the rest of the night!" Denji's voice shot up defensively.

"You kept staring all night?!" You shot back.

You groaned and straightened your voice. "Moving on." You tried changing the conversation as you took out another cigarette and lit it.

"You never told me why you're here." You said, putting your hands in your pockets.

"Sorry, super top secret." Denji stretched, his voice playfully sarcastic.

"I didn't know you took me as a snitch." You looked to the ground and smiled, nudging his shoulder.

"It's not me that you gotta convince." 

Denji rocked back on his heels, glancing through the glass doors of the arcade. "Man, it's freezing out here."

He shriveled slightly as you just now realized he was wearing a t-shirt. You felt a chill run down your spine just by looking at him. 

"Let's head inside. I should be watching Yuto anyway."

Denji grabbed your wrist and tugging you toward the entrance. "C'mon, I'll help you keep an eye on him."

The warmth of the arcade hit you immediately. You scanned the room, spotting your brother aggressively button-mashing on a fighting game, completely immersed. At least he was occupied.

Denji flopped down into a seat by the window, stretching his arms behind his head. The sunset in the background cast a golden glow, its warm light spilling and reflecting on his face, matching beautifully with his hair.

"Man, you ever notice how places like this feel weirdly nostalgic, even if you never came to 'em as a kid?"

You sat next to him, resting your back on the window. "Not really. I actually did go to places like this."

Denji shrugged, flashing a lopsided grin. "Guess I just gotta make memories now, huh?"

You rolled your eyes but found yourself smiling anyway. "What, and you're dragging me into them?"

"Duh," he replied, leaning forward slightly. "Who else am I gonna make 'em with?"

Your breath hitched for just a second. His body was close now. Closer than before.

You felt your body react before your mind, leaning in just the slightest bit, mirroring him. His expression didn't change, but his eyes flickered down to your lips. The arcade noise faded into the background.

Just a little closer.

"Having fun?"

A hand clapped down on Denji's shoulder.

You nearly jumped out of your seat, startled, as you shot up to see a strange man looming over Denji. 

Denji let out a strangled noise, his shoulders tensing before he slumped in annoyance.

"Yoshida, dude," Denji groaned, rubbing his temple. "Do you have to do that?"

That's Yoshida, you thought.

Yoshida ignored him, turning his gaze to you instead. "Didn't expect to see you two getting cozy."

Your face burned, and you immediately leaned back, clearing your throat. "It's not what it looks like."

"Sure." Yoshida's smirk didn't waver. "Anyway, Denji, mind stepping outside? We need to talk."

Denji let out a dramatic sigh, standing up and stuffing his hands in his pockets. "About time you came."

You chuckled. "Lemme guess. Super top secret?"

Yoshida's expression didn't change. "You catch on quick." His eyes burned into yours, an intensity behind them that made you feel uneasy.

Denji shot you a glance before following Yoshida toward the exit, leaving you sitting there, still reeling from the moment that had just slipped away.

You held your face in your palms for a second, trying to steady yourself as your skin still burned from your almost kiss. Your heart was hammering. against your ribs like it hadn't caught up with reality yet.

With a sigh, you pull out your flip phone, hoping to ground yourself in something familiar. But when you glanced at the screen, your stomach twisted.

Something didn't look right. The numbers are jumbled, symbols where there shouldn't be any. 21:67. The digits flicker, something writhing beneath them like they're alive.

Your pulse pounded in your ears.

Before you could react, a tug on your sleeve nearly made you jump. Your head shot up, but to your relief, it was just Yuto, his big eyes staring up at you. He held out a hand, fingers wiggling. "More coins?"

You frowned, trying to shake the unease clinging to you. "Yuto, I already gave you some. You can't just waste them all and ask for more."

He puffed up his cheeks in a pout.

"I SAID I WANT MORE COINS."

The blood drained from your face. Your breath stuttering.

It wasn't his voice.

It was deep. Too deep. A voice that doesn't belong in a child's body. It rumbled through the air like a distorted radio frequency, layered, wrong.

He just grinned, his smile almost too big for his face as you watched him in horror.

"Yuto?"

Chapter Text

"They're just sleeping, right?" he whispered, voice trembling. His wide, teary eyes had searched yours, desperate for something, anything, to hold onto.

The first time your brother cried in your arms, you were both covered in blood.

Not yours. Not his.

Your parents'.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

Yuto's grin stretched wide, too wide, his small frame trembling like a puppet on invisible strings. His pupils darkened, behind them a slight swirling effect, which made you feel suspiciously uneasy.

You reached out for him, grabbing him by his shoulders and looking him straight in the eyes, an expression of raw, unfiltered panic on your face.

Yoshida violently opened the door, rushing to you. 

"Move." He said bluntly, his expression remaining unchanged. "Right now."

Your body trembled as you immediately stood up, shielding your brother. 

"He's just a child!" You cried out as Yoshida stepped towards you, so close that you could feel the heat of his breath on your face.

"That's not your brother anymore." He replied with a chilling smile. "Your brother's gone, now please step aside as I won't hesitate to kill you. Consider this your final warning."

Denji watched the scene unfold, his expression tense as a crowd began to gather, murmurs rising around you.

"Hey, man, it's fine, we can handle this another way-"

Before he could finish, Yoshida cut him off with a brutal kick to the chest. The impact sent Denji crashing through the windows, shattering the glass.

Screams filled the air as people scrambled to flee, mothers shielding their children's eyes from the chaos.

You took your chance and grabbed Yuto's hand as you bolted toward the far end of the arcade. Your heart pounded as you weaved through the panicked crowd, dodging overturned chairs and flashing screens. Spotting the electrical room, you yanked the door open, pulled Yuto inside, and slammed it shut behind you, your breath ragged as you pressed your back against the cold metal. You squatted down with your head in your hands as you tried steadying yourself. 

"Think... think!" You slapped yourself, trying to force your panicked mind into action.

The door burst open with a crash. Yoshida stood in the doorway, his dark eyes scanning the dim room, his presence suffocating.

You grabbed Yuto's hand, willing the strange power inside you to awaken. It responded instantly, a cold, weightless sensation washing over you both. The world around you twisted and blurred, like ink dissolving in water. Everything you touched with your hand now turned invisible. Maybe it was a good thing you made a contract with a devil, you thought.

Yoshida stepped inside. His gaze swept the room once, twice, then narrowed.

You didn't move. You didn't breathe.

He was right in front of you, close enough that you could see the subtle twitch of his fingers around his sword.

But he didn't see you. 

"I know you're in here. I'm just trying to help you," Yoshida's voice rang out, smooth and mocking. He took a slow step forward, his silhouette framed by the flickering lights of the arcade.

"You're clinging to a corpse, the Clown Devil took control of his mind and body." he continued, his tone cruel. "Your little one's gone. Now come out and stop wasting my time."

Your grip on Yuto's hand tightened as a shiver ran down his small frame. Your back pressed against the cold metal wall, heart hammering against your ribs.

He didn't know where you were. He's bluffing, you thought. 

You made him see something that wasn't there. Something even you didn't have the answer as to how you did it. Something Unknown. 

You made him hallucinate Yuto at the back of the room, his figure vanishing just as he tried to reach him. 

You made the call, no more hiding.

With Yuto clinging to your back, you bolted out of the electrical room, your legs burning as you pushed forward. The arcade was in chaos, flashing lights and abandoned games casting eerie glows across the floor.

Your invisibility wavered. The cold, weightless sensation was slipping through your fingers like sand.

Then in an instant, it was gone.

"Shit!" you cursed as your body became fully visible again.

You barely made it outside, your lungs burning. The cool night air did little to ease the suffocating dread in your chest.

Denji lay on the pavement, unconscious with deep scratches on his body. Blood smeared across his torn clothes, but his chest still rose and fell. 

You wasted no time, setting Yuto down next to you and rushing to Denji's side.

"Denji! Get up!" You grabbed his arm, shaking him. "Please, wake up! We need to go!"

You didn't want to leave Denji behind.

He had stood up for you, fought for you. That was why he was in this state, lifeless and unconscious on the pavement. Abandoning him now felt like a betrayal.

You grabbed one of his arms and threw it behind your neck, lifting him up. 

As you turned to grab Yuto's hand, his small voice cut through the air.

"Sis?"

It was his voice, your brother's voice. Not the deep and twisted one from earlier. Something in his tone made your stomach twist. You froze.

His expression had changed, dark eyes hollow, his once frightened face now eerily calm.

From inside, a massive, slick tentacle shot forward.

Before you could scream, it wrapped around Yuto's fragile body, bringing him up and squeezing.

A sickening crunch echoed through the empty streets. Blood sprayed all across the ground.

Your vision blurred. Your throat closed. A hollow, piercing silence rang in your ears. 

A scream ripped from your throat, raw and agonized, spilling out like it could somehow undo what had just happened. It burned, tasted like blood, but you couldn't stop. Your knees buckled as you fell to the floor, setting Denji back down. hands trembling as they reached out for something, someone, who was no longer there.

This wasn't real. It couldn't be real.

But the crimson-stained pavement told you otherwise.

Denji's grabbed your hand, his grip tightening on your hand. His strength was barely holding through the haze of pain and blood. You tried to break free, to rush toward your brother's shattered body, but Denji pulled you back, his touch urgent, desperate.

He wasn't letting you go.

You collapsed against him, the weight of everything crashing down on you. Your screams were raw, filled with a guttural pain that you couldn't contain. Tears poured down your face, soaking into his torn shirt and mixing with his blood as you sobbed uncontrollably into his shoulder. 

Denji didn't say anything. He just held you. The world around you blurred into a haze of sorrow, but for a fleeting moment, his arms around you were the only thing keeping you bound to reality.

"I know what it's like!" Denji yelled out, his voice sharp, desperate, as if trying to distract you from the scene.

You barely heard him through the cloud of pain, but his words still pierced the fog. He gripped you tighter, his rough hands shaking against your back.

"I've lost people too!" he continued, each word dripping with his own agony. "I know what it feels like! But you can't- you can't let it swallow you whole, man!"

You whimpered, your body trembling in his arms, but his words, torn and ragged as they were, finally reached something inside you. You pulled back slightly, enough to meet his gaze, blurry from the tears.

He was broken too. He understood loss in a way that made his pain feel like your own. He's probably experienced more pain than just losing a family member. 

"You're not alone," Denji whispered, his hands coming up to cup your face. "I'll be here. The same way I know I'm not alone. You're the only one that's shown me real, human affection in like, forever!"

"Why are you nice to me?" You sniffed, your voice trembling. Denji simply smiled, looking at you through his eyelashes.

"Why are you nice to me?"

The world blurred and twisted around you before everything went black.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You woke up, blinking slowly as you opened your eyes to an unfamiliar ceiling. Your body was drenched in sweat and blood and your breath shaky as your eyes darted around the room. A little girl stood right in front of your face, staring at you with an unreadable expression.

You jolted upright and scrambled backwards, a confused expression written on your face.

"Denji! She's up. Can you make her leave now?" the girl called out, her voice impatient.

"Nayuta, it's alright," a familiar voice came from the doorway.

Your body moved on autopilot, sitting up and rubbing your eyes. "Oh god, what time is it?"

"Don't worry 'bout it." He turned to you. "I made you breakfast." He handed you a plate, two slices of toast, burnt completely black.

You looked at them for a second and let out a chuckle. "Thanks..." You examined the toast. "But, I need to get back to-"

You stared at him blankly for a second, as he watched your expression drop. The words died in your throat and your heart dropped.

For a split moment you've forgotten. The weight of everything. The screaming. The blood. Your brother's lifeless body lying on the cold asphalt.

Maybe it had been a dream, you thought. But the sick feeling twisting in your gut told you otherwise. It was real. It happened.

Denji looked at you confused. 

"Hey, it's okay." He put a hand on your shoulder, his warmth grounding you.

"I don't get it." You sighed loudly, swallowing the lump in your throat, forcing yourself to keep it together. "Why does it always end like this? Every single person I care about, they always-" Your breath hitched. "They always die."

Saying it out loud made it feel even more real. Like a curse you could never escape.

Denji exhaled through his nose, glancing away for a second before looking back at you. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes, those tired, knowing eyes told you he understood.

"...Yeah," he said finally. "That's how it goes."

You lifted your head from your hands, staring at him. "That's it?"

He shrugged. "What else is there to say? It's shitty. It's unfair. And it doesn't stop." His fingers curled slightly against your shoulder. "You already know that."

You did. You knew it too well.

Denji leaned back, rubbing his neck. "But... y'know. You're still here."

You blinked. "...And?"

"And that's gotta mean somethin', right?" He gave you a lopsided grin, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "If you're still here, maybe that means you ain't really banned from bein' happy. Maybe you just haven't experienced it yet."

You stared at him, trying to find some flaw in his logic, something to argue against, but all you could feel was exhaustion. Exhaustion and something else, something smaller, quieter.

Hope? No. You didn't dare name it that.

You sighed, shaking your head. "...You're an idiot."

Denji smirked, finally nudging you again. "Yeah, but I'm a right idiot."

You didn't smile. Not really. But you didn't cry either. And for now, that was enough.

"I'm going out for a drink," you said flatly, pushing yourself to your feet. "Thanks... for everything. For bringing me here when I passed out."

Denji stretched his arms behind his head. "Alright, do what you gotta do. But you better come back after, Nayuta's making dinner."

"Nuh uh!" Nayuta shouted from the other room.

Denji smirked. "Okay, fine. I'm making dinner. Either way, I'll be expecting you."

You shook your head, slipping on your coat. "I really shouldn't. You've already done enough for me, and I mean it, I appreciate it more than anything."

Denji shrugged. "Then show your appreciation by eating my shitty cooking."

You let out a small laugh but didn't respond. Instead, you turned toward the door, gripping the handle a little too tight and exiting the apartment.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The cold air slammed into you the moment you stepped outside, sharp enough to cut through your coat, sharp enough to bring everything rushing back. Every horrible thing. Every loss. Every moment you buried deep inside of you came crashing like a huge wave. 

Tears slipped down your face before you even realized you were crying. Not the kind that came with screams or shaking shoulders, just silent, steady streams, the kind that reminded you how alone you were.

The only time you didn't feel that way was when Denji was around. You didn't know how you managed to hold it together when you woke up. He was truly the only person you had left. 

You raised your head and spotted a kiosk right next to you, pausing to count your money before pushing open the door. A small bell chimed overhead.

The cashier barely glanced at you. "What'll it be?”

"Two packs of Marlboro Reds and three medium sized bottles of your cheapest wine." You counted your money again. "…And your cheapest lighter."

The cashier continued typing in the price. "Celebrating something?"

You hesitated, gripping your cash a little tighter. What a silly question, she probably didn't see the tears on your face, though.

"...Yeah."

Chapter Text

"I deserve this" You mumbled to yourself as you opened the first bottle of wine. 

You stumbled upon an abandoned building in the area, and without much thought, you climbed up to the roof. The view was breathtaking, the sky almost completely clear, the moon casting a soft glow on your face. But despite the beauty around you, you couldn't shake the heaviness in your chest.

You pulled out your portable CD player, your fingers fumbling slightly as you hit play on the one CD inside. All the others were back at your place, but it didn't matter. The familiar sound of the music filled the silence, mixing with the soft breeze, but it didn't offer the comfort you hoped for.

You wiped your nose as tears began streaming down your face, and in a desperate attempt to quiet the ache inside, you chugged a third of the bottle in one go.

The harsh taste burned down your throat, but it wasn't enough. The bottle stared back at you, daring you to finish it. You dragged a cigarette between your fingers, the smoke swirling around you like thick clouds.

Your thoughts were heavy, each sip making them blurrier. You stared out at the city, the lights flickering like distant stars, and your mind kept drifting back to one thing. 

Denji. 

You couldn't stop it.

He was everywhere. His stupid grin, his carelessness, the way he made everything feel less like a nightmare and more like something you could stand to live through.

But it wasn't that simple. It never was.

The wine was smooth now, the bitterness fading into a warm haze. You chugged more, watching the bottle get emptied. 

You lit another cigarette, the smoke filling your lungs as you let your head fall back against the floor.

You didn't deserve to be happy. 

You didn't deserve to take care of your brother, it was hard not to blame yourself for his death. He was just a kid. A kid that trusted you with every bone and nerve in his body. And you failed him. 

You didn't deserve the warmth that Denji offered either, the genuine kindness that always seemed to come when you least expected it. Everyone you cared about always ended up gone. You always ended up alone.

But not tonight. Tonight, the wine burned it all away.

A sudden, overwhelming urge hit you. You grabbed your flip phone, fingers fumbling as you held it. Your heart pounded against your chest as you found Denji's contact. You had exchanged numbers in school just in case.

Before you could stop yourself, your thumb hovered over the call button. The words were already forming in your mind, spilling out faster than your heart could catch up.

"I'm still too sober for this." You said as you grabbed the second bottle, opening it hurriedly and began drinking it. Small drops of wine spilled from your mouth all the way down to your shirt, soaking it. 

You quickly wiped the wine from your chin, but it only smeared, leaving a trail of red that matched the color of the liquid in your hand. 

The second bottle was already half gone, and you could feel the alcohol dulling the sharp edge of your thoughts, but the pounding in your chest only grew louder.

You lay back on the cold, hard ground, your eyes locking onto a single star in the sky as your thoughts drifted, floating aimlessly like the smoke from your cigarette. 

Denji's face appeared in your mind, his stupid grin, his careless way of always pushing forward, no matter what. His touch, his voice, the way he could make you forget, even if only for a second, everything else in your world.

You thought about the things he said to you, the way he made you feel like maybe, just maybe, you weren't so alone in this messed-up world. But more than that, you thought about the things you wanted him to do to you. The things you couldn't say out loud, not sober, not ever. The things that made your heart race, your skin heat up, your breath hitch in your throat.

But now, under the influence of the alcohol, you didn't feel embarrassed by it. No shame. Just honesty.

You always told yourself the truth when you were drunk, no matter how raw or ugly it was.

You wanted him. Wanted him in ways that went beyond words, beyond what you could control. And you didn't even care anymore.

You tilted the bottle back, chugging down the last drop of wine, feeling the liquid burn its way down your throat. The sudden movement as you lay back was a mistake, the sensation of the wine hitting your chest too quickly made you choke, a harsh cough escaping your lips as the burning sensation seared through your throat.

You pressed your hand against your mouth, trying to steady yourself, but all that came out was a bitter laugh.

Truth was, you couldn't wait to see Denji again tonight. Your head felt light, like you were floating, caught somewhere between the wine and the rush of your thoughts. You smiled to yourself, the thought of him touching you, everywhere, made your chest tighten in a way that almost felt too good.

You made a plan, almost instinctively. You'd run back home, change into something that showed your body. Something that would make him notice, make him want you the way you wanted him.

The idea of impressing him, of having his attention on you in that way, sent a thrill through your veins. All you wanted was to make him see you, see this side of you. The side you usually kept hidden. 

You felt a heat form in your pants, as you slapped your thigh trying to ground yourself. "You can't act like this. Not right now." A tear fell down your cheek as the intensity of everything overwhelmed you.

You pushed yourself up and rushed down the building, the cold night air hitting you like a shock. Your heart raced as you ran, your legs moving almost on instinct. You scanned the streets ahead, desperate to find something familiar, anything that would point you in the right direction.

As you turned a corner, you spotted a sign that read "2 kilometers to Fourth East high school." Relief washed over you for a split second. You knew the way home from there. 

With renewed urgency, you pushed forward, feet pounding against the pavement as you raced through the quiet streets, the weight of your thoughts and the pounding in your chest driving you faster, the liter and a half of wine fueling you.

You finally stumbled through your front door, breathing heavily as you unlocked it and closed it behind you. You had promised yourself that, for just one day, you'd find a way to be happy, to push aside the weight of everything that dragged you down. 

So, instead of letting the familiar sights and smells pull you into a spiral of nostalgia, you shut your eyes, steadying yourself. 

You charged forward, running through the small house, bumping into walls and furniture every few steps.

A small laugh escaped your lips as you imagined Denji watching you. You could almost hear his voice, mocking yet playful, calling you out for being so reckless. The thought made you smile, a brief moment of lightness amid everything else. 

You finally reached your room, fumbling through your closet with little care, grabbing whatever you could feel in the chaos. You rushed back outside, keeping your eyes closed, trying to avoid the familiar surroundings that might make you emotional.

You opened your eyes, to reveal a long, black dress that complimented your body just right. It was your favorite one, a thrift store find that cost almost nothing but felt priceless. 

A small chuckle escaped your lips as you ducked behind a bush, quickly changing into the dress, the excitement of something new washing over you. 

You left your old bloody clothes behind in the bush, the thin-strap dress clinging to your body as you ran another 2 kilometers back, the cool night air rushing past you. Every step felt like it pushed you closer to something, an answer, a moment, or maybe just Denji.

When you finally reached his house after an exhausting 15 minutes of running, you paused at the front door. You quickly ran your fingers through your hair, trying to tame the mess from your run and pushed your boobs up, making them appear bigger and perkier. Your face was flushed red from running in the cold.

Taking a deep breath, you steadied yourself, pushing away any lingering nerves. You were here now. No turning back. 

You knocked on the door, your hands instinctively moving behind your back as you tried to steady yourself, but your drunk self stumbled, nearly tripping over nothing.

You waited, watching the door creak open, but your heart sank when you saw a small figure standing there instead of Denji.

"Hey, N-Nayuta right?" you hiccuped, trying to keep your balance. "Where's De-"

Before you could finish, she slammed the door in your face. The suddenness of it left you frozen for a moment, the sting of rejection sharp. 

But then you heard Denji's voice from inside, shouting at her to stop, followed by the sound of hurried footsteps rushing toward the door. 

You could hear the soft crackle of a cassette tape playing from inside. The song was oddly familiar, and as the quiet melody filled the air, it clicked. Dire straits, you thought to yourself with a small, quiet smile. 

"Hey, I'm so sorr..." Denji opened the door again, his voice trailing off and the words dying in his throat as his eyes fell on you. 

His gaze swept over your figure, lingering for a moment longer than usual. The dress, your disheveled hair, and the slight sway of your stance as the alcohol buzzed in your system. His expression shifted from surprise to something unreadable, and for a second, you could feel the weight of the moment pressing down on you.

"Hi, Denji." You said softly, a seductive tone in your voice as you glanced up at him, your eyes locked on his. 

You felt the warmth of his gaze on your skin. Moreso your chest. You felt the air between you thicken.

"Y-yeah!" Denji stuttered, quickly snapping out of his trance. "I made l-lunch, I mean dinner!" He added, scratching the back of his neck, clearly very flustered. "Come on in." 

You shut the door behind you and took a moment to let your gaze wander, soaking in the sight of Denji's toned muscles. They were perfectly sculpted, the lines of his body fitting together like pieces of a well-crafted puzzle. He truly looked like the kind of person you'd imagine chainsaw man to be, raw, powerful, and unapologetically himself. And, let's not forget extremely sexy.

You wanted to jump on him, to go feral, but you held yourself back a bit. Even with the wine buzzing in your system. 

Only a bit.

"Thank... you... Denji." The words were melting off your tongue. You slowly came closer and embraced him, wrapping your hands around his neck and your fingers entwining in his hair.

His body felt incredible pressed against yours, you've dreamed of moments like these for weeks on end. As your chest rested on his, you felt something poke your lower half, and it wasn't a finger.

"Ew! Get off of him!" Nayuta shouted, appearing suddenly and glaring at you with a look of disbelief and disgust.

"Nayuta, it's past 10, and you need to sleep. Go back to bed, we're just having dinner, that's all." Denji said, turning around to face her.

Nayuta crossed her arms, exhaling sharply in frustration. "Fine! But no funny business. I'll know if something happens." She stormed off, slamming her door behind her with a loud bang.

Denji quickly sneaked a glance at your chest, and you caught him in the act. You couldn't help but laugh, the awkwardness of the moment breaking the tension.

"Uhm, anyway. " Denji stammered, his eyes widening as his cheeks flushed, an awkward grin plastered on his face. 

"You... you look-" He stuttered. 

You couldn't resist a sly smile as you gently placed your thumb on his lower lip, tugging it down and watching it spring back up when you released it. 

"Mhmm?" You tilted your head slightly to the side, glancing at him through your eyelashes, your hands still clasped behind his back and your faces inches away from each other. You didn't break contact with his lips, continuing to intensely stare at them.

Usually, wine would bring you down, spiraling into thoughts you didn't want to face. But this time, for some reason, it made you feel... well... 

Your vision blurred and your mind raced in a foggy haze as you leaned in, your face just inches from his, the tension between you both evident in the air.

Your breath hitched as his lips brushed against yours, soft at first, almost hesitant, as if leaving room for you to pull back. You let out a breathy moan at his motion, signaling for more.

You finally gave in and kissed him, your lips melting on his. The world around you blurred, and everything else seemed to fade into the background. His expression remained unchanged, flustered, sweaty and wide-eyed. It was as if he was frozen in place, processing everything at once.

After a moment he kissed you back, his resistance crumbling as his eyes rolled back before finally shutting them. Hands rested gently on your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss deepened, both of you moving instinctively. 

His hands went from your waist down to your ass, squeezing it lightly which earned another quiet moan from you against his lips.

"Shh." He whispered against your lips, his breath warm and soft, sending a shiver down your spine. His fingers continuing to cup your ass as he leaned in again, not waiting for an invitation, his lips finding yours once more. This time with more intensity. 

You were too drunk to form a proper response, but instead, you just laughed softly. Without hesitation, you pushed your tongue into his mouth, tasting the heat of him.  

"Oh! I love this song!" you exclaimed, breaking the kiss with a breathless grin, a thin line of saliva separating your lips. Without thinking, you grabbed Denji's hand and pulled him toward the tape player, your body swaying to the familiar melody.

He stumbled slightly, still dazed from the kiss, but let you guide him. His hands were warm in yours as you started moving, leading him in a slow, playful dance. The dim lighting cast soft shadows over his face, highlighting the flustered expression he hadn't quite shaken off.

"You're really into this, huh?" he muttered, watching you with amusement and awe.

"Of course! It's a classic," you said, spinning yourself before pulling him closer, your bodies nearly touching again. The wine in your system made you bolder, your laughter light and carefree.

Denji swallowed hard, his hands awkwardly gripping yours as he tried to follow your movements. "I, uh... I don't really know how to dance."

You pulled him closer again. "C'mon, dancing isn't about looking cool, it's about having fun." You said as you twirled yourself again, nearly tripping over your own feet. 

Denji shook his head with a grin. "Fine, but if I step on your foot it's your fault."

"Shut up and dance with me, chainsaw man." you shot back, pulling him closer and kissing him again. 

Resting one hand on his shoulder, caressing the toned muscle and the other in his hair, massaging his head, which earned another breathy moan from Denji.

You lost yourselves in the kiss for a few minutes, bodies pressed close, warmth radiating between you as if you were glued together, not able to separate, not wanting to. 

A sharp beep of the oven cut through the moment, signaling the food was ready.

Denji pulled away reluctantly, breathless. "I better not burn this like I did with the toast this morning."

You let out a small whine, pouting up at him. "I was just getting worked up."

He stuttered for a second before smiling.. "Yeah, but I don't think Nayuta'll be too happy if I serve her charcoal for dinner twice in one day. You as well."

You chuckled and leaned into his ear, your voice barely above a whisper.

"What if I eat something else afterwards?"

Chapter Text

Denji looked at you wide-eyed, his body stiffening at your request and his face heating up.

"W-what?"

"DENJI!" Nayuta burst open the door and stormed into the living room before you could say anything. You and Denji jolted apart instantly. 

"Is it dinner ready-" She stopped in her tracks, furrowing her brows. "Why is she still here?" 

Denji came up to her and ruffled her hair, trying to steady himself from what just happened moments ago. 

"Relax, Nayuta. I'll... uhh... take her home after dinner and be right back." He smiled as he walked to the kitchen. "You better keep an eye on the dogs while I'm gone." 

Nayuta let out an irritating groan. "Do you have to?!" She stomped after him into the kitchen like an angry child.

"It'll be real quick, promise." he crouched to her level, playfully squeezing her cheek.

You and Denji sat down cross-legged on the floor around the table, neither of you saying a word, just looking at each other as tension filled the air.

Nayuta walked in from the kitchen and casually placed two plates on the table. One for herself and one for Denji.

Denji opened his mouth, ready to scold her but you cut him off. "It's alright, I'll get mine." you awkwardly laughed, standing up to grab your plate yourself, not wanting to be an even bigger problem for Nayuta as she made it clear you weren't her favorite.

You sat in silence, the clicking of chopsticks agsinst plates being the only sound breaking it.

"Do you like her?" Nayuta muttered with food in her mouth, her tone casual but cutting.

Denji coughed, almost choking on his food. "I... don't know what you mean." He said hesitantly, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

You paused as you looked up at him, the chopsticks stopping midway to your mouth. Your appetite seemed to disappear. He didn't like you? What was that supposed to mean? Maybe you were overthinking it, you thought as you slowly put the food in your mouth, looking down in disappointment. 

You considered standing up and heading home, but hesitated, feeling guilty about leaving your meal unfinished. Denji had cooked for you, after all. Still, he left you feeling uncertain, his signals were all over the place. Maybe it truly was the alcohol making you overanalyze everything. 

"You good?" Denji cut you out of your thoughts.

God, he really was an idiot.

You forced a smile. "Yeah. Great." you muttered before taking another bite. 

You finished your meal before them and stood up, taking your plate to the kitchen. 

"Well, uh, I should get going. Thanks for having me over." you said, already slipping on your jacket as you made your way to the door. "It's late, I better not bother you."

Even when drunk, you still had manners, you gave yourself a little credit for that. Denji's words still stuck to you, stinging more than you wanted to admit. Suddenly, everything awful that had happened to you came crashing down like a wave, suffocating you. You just wanted to get out of there. 

"Hey, wait-!" Denji called out, reaching toward you, but it was too late. You were already gone. 

"Finally." Nayuta scoffed, crossing her arms.

Denji groaned, running a hand through his hair. "Nayuta..."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You barely made it home before collapsing onto your bed, letting out a heavy sigh. The moment your head hit the pillow, tears started streaming down your eyes. The darkness in your room only making it worse, amplifying the isolation and heaviness in your chest.

You couldn't believe you had let yourself think, for even a moment, that someone might actually like you. The realization felt humiliating, a cruel joke to your dispense.

Right then and there, you made a promise to yourself. You wouldn't fall for anyone ever again. Denji was just a lesson.

Denji.

His name echoed in your mind. Just thinking about it made your gut twist. You never wanted to see him again.

"Hey."

"ARGH!" you screamed, jumping back as you spotted a shadowy figure of a man outside your window.

The man jumped back, jokingly dropping into a defensive stance. "It's me, relax." He said as he casually climbed out the window and entered your room. 

"Oh my god, Denji." you recognized his voice and put a hand on your chest, steadying your breath. "Were you following me?" You turned on your night lamp to see him.

"I can't let a pretty lady like yourself walk alone at night." Denji grinned, plopping down beside you on the bed and wiping your tears away with his index finger. "But to answer your question, no, I wasn't."

You furrowed your brows. "Excuse you, last time I remembered, I have devil powers. I can walk myself home." You straightened your voice. "Also, how the fuck do you know where I live?" You uttered in disbelief.

Denji arched a brow, his face saying everything. "You literally saw me on this street and ran to me like you were out of your mind. Without a bra on, mind you." He pointed out the window. "You remember that?"

You sighed loudly and slapped your face, how could you not remember?

"Did you have to mention that part?" You groaned.

"It wouldn't be funny if I didn't." He flopped down on his back, his arms behind his head. "Plus, your surname is literally written on a card on the door. Pretty simple."

"For someone this stupid, that was actually smart." You couldn't contain yourself anymore and let out a small chuckle, hiding your face from him.

"Thanks!" He smiled brightly, acting as if you hadn't just called him stupid.

You sighed and sat cross-legged next to his head, slightly twirling his hair as he closed his eyes, enjoying the moment. 

"Denji." Your tone shifted, turning serious.

He hummed in response, tilting his head slightly. 

You swallowed, your fingers gripping the fabric of your sleeve. "What's wrong with me?" you asked, voice barely above a whisper.

He blinked, clearly caught off guard. "Huh? What are you takin' about?" He sat up, looking at you baffled. "All I see is a hot girl that's into me. Where's the issue?"

You looked away, a disappointed smile on your lips. That's all? You thought. You couldn't bring yourself to look at him.

"That's not all." Denji's gaze locked onto yours, his expression uncharacteristically sincere. "You're smart, sharp... and, not to mention, the first person who's ever really cared about me. I cherish that a lot."

You felt your face heat up but tried to play it off, nudging him lightly and letting out a small chuckle. "I don't believe you." You truly didn't.

"Guess I'll have to show you." He grabbed your arms and suddenly tackled you onto the bed, pinning you beneath him as he kneeled over you. Your face burned, but you couldn't look away. He latched his mouth onto your neck and playfully started biting it, earning an unintentional, soft moan from you.

"D-Denji..." You breathed heavily.

"I have a secret to share with you..." He lifted himself slightly, leveling his mouth to your ear. His voice was deep and serious, sending a wave of panic through you. 

He latched his mouth onto your neck again, blowing against your skin, sending a ticklish shiver through you. You shrieked with laughter, squirming to escape, but he swiftly caught your hands, pinning them down against the bed once more. 

"Denji!" you shrieked, but your laughter quickly cut it short as he kept tickling your neck, completely relentless. 

You couldn't stop laughing until he suddenly lowered his body, pressing against you as he practically lay on top of you. Your breath hitched, the warmth between you shifting the mood in an instant. You felt something hard against your thigh as Denji continued tickling you.

You let out a breath of pleasure as you started grinding against his crotch. 

Denji froze, his face flushing red. 

"About that thing you said earlier?" Denji brought his face up, just inches from yours, a sly smile playing on his lips. 

You quickly averted your gaze. "Oh god, which one..." you muttered, feeling the last traces of your drunken haze slip away. You were almost sober now, unfortunately.

But still not completely.

"If you don't want to, I'm-"

"No." You cut him off, your voice firm. "I do."

You grabbed him by the shoulders and with a sudden burst of force, flipped him over. Denji barely had time to react before he landed on his back, now the one pinned beneath you.

You straddled his lap, grinding on him in a slow, deliberate rhythm. Your hands roamed over his toned muscles, tracing the contours of his chest as heat pooled between you. Denji's breath hitched, his hands hesitating before gripping your waist. 

You put your hands over his and guided them to your chest, making them caress your breasts. Denji's eyes widened, his mouth slightly open as if he wanted to say something, but no words came out. He was completely speechless, his hands frozen on your chest.

You slowly moved down, positioning your face near his crotch, your fingers grazing his inner thighs as you looked up at him lustfully.

His dick twitched in his pants, his erection clearly visible and growing. His hands gripped the sheets beside him, body tensing under your touch.

"Are you sure you want this?" You said as your fingertips merely grazed the zipper of his pants.

He quickly nodded, already breathless. "Yeah," he managed to say, his voice slightly shaky. "If I ever say no to that question, I want you to know that's not me." he added, a lopsided grin on his face. 

You smiled, fingers working quickly to unbutton his pants. With his help, you slid them off, the fabric rustling as you slid it down his ankles. Denji swallowed hard, his breath unsteady as he looked down at you.

"Could you..." Denji hesitated, scratching his chin as a flush crept up his face. His eyes darted away for a second before flicking back to you. "T-take your shirt off...?" 

"You do it." You chuckled as you straightened yourself and brought your hands above your head. He sat up and slowly took your shirt off, slightly grazing your skin. His cold fingertips sent a shiver down your spine.

Your tits slightly bounced as he took your shirt off, comfortably sitting in your bra. You pressed a firm hand against his chest, pushing him back down onto the bed. 

You hooked your thumbs into the waistband of your pants, maintaining eye contact with Denji as you slowly slid them down your hips, leaving you only in your undergarments. 

You noticed his cock twitch beneath you, a clear sign of his anticipation. A sly smile played on your lips, you figured it'd be fun to tease him a little before getting to the main event. 

"You have an amazing body..." you muttered, your fingers tracing slow, lazy circles over the fabric of his shirt before gradually pushing it up. As your hands traveled over his lower torso, you felt the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips. It made you squirm more than you thought it would, but you kept composed.

You gathered a fistful of the hem of his shirt, slowly dragging it upward, revealing more of his toned stomach and chest. As the fabric bunched in your grip, you brought it up to his face. 

"Bite on it, for me, please?"

He wasted no time, quickly biting down on his shirt to keep it in place. His toned chest was now fully exposed, rising and falling with each heavy breath. A small, muffled hum escaped his lips as he looked up at you, eyes clouded with anticipation. His hands twitched at his sides, as if resisting the urge to grab onto you.

You slowly lowered yourself again, your face leveling with his crotch. You pressed small, teasing pecks along his shaft through the thin fabric of his boxers, feeling the heat and twitch beneath your lips.

Denji squeezed his eyes shut, a low grunt escaping past the fabric clenched between his teeth. His body tensed beneath you, his hips subtly shifting as if fighting the urge to buck up into your touch. Spit had begun to gather on his shirt, dampening the fabric where it rested between his lips.

"Don't be impatient, Denji." Your voice was soft, mouth simply grazing over his erection, sending vibrations through his entire cock.

You finally decided to end his torture, hooking your fingers around the waistband of his boxers and slowly sliding them down. Denji let out a shaky breath, his body tensing beneath you as he eagerly watched your every move.

His cock sprung up, hitting his stomach and bouncing off, twitching in mid air. You licked your lips, hungry eyes flickering up to meet his, taking in the way his chest rose and fell with uneven breaths. 

You slowly grabbed and jerked his cock, leaning in and positioning it right in front of your tits.

You closed the space from you and his dick, licking a stripe from the base to his tip. You never took your eyes off him, watching him amusingly as his eyes failed to stay open, his face flushing a bright red color.

You kissed and pecked it a few times to keep him on edge, and finally closed your mouth around his tip, swirling sloppy circles on it with your tongue.

Denji let out a load, muffled moan, his fingers digging into the mattress as if he was holding on it for dear life.

You felt a wave of pleasure and instinctively reached down with your other hand to rub circles on your clit. You closed your eyes, focusing on the sensation to find some relief as you let out a soft moan. 

Your hums and moans sent shivers to his body as you slowly went deeper, licking and tasting every part of him.

Suddenly, you felt his dick tense up and his breath coming out in short, ragged gasps and his cock starting to twitch rapidly. 

You quickly pulled back, seeing how close he was to cumming, as you met his dazed, half-lidded eyes stare into yours with anticipation and need. 

"W-why'th you sthop?" Denji whined, his jaw tightening around the fabric of his shirt. 

You tilted your head, fingers tracing slow, lazy patterns along his abdomen. "Come on, Denji," you smiled at him. "I need to know how bad you want it." 

His breath hitched and his resolve crumbled. He swallowed hard, his voice coming out hoarse and strained. Who was he to deny this?

"...Please."

You smiled as you leaned back down. "That's a good boy."

The moment you brought your lips back on his cock, you picked up the pace, taking all of him at once. 

You rolled your eyes back and your face burned red, his cock grazing the back of your throat as you continued rubbing your clit, feeling your underwear dampen. 

His head rolled back against the pillow, his eyes hazy and unfocused as he tried to steady his breathing. A deep, shaky groan escaped his lips as he finally came, his body trembling from the intensity.

You swallowed his cum and licked him clean, leaving small kisses on his dick before it went flaccid.

"You look wrecked," you teased, lying down beside him and looking at him with affection in your eyes.

Denji let out a breathless laugh, visibly exhausted. "Yeah, no kidding..." He blinked up at you, still trying to regain some semblance of control. "Didn't think you had it in you."

You gasped dramatically before smacking his shoulder, letting out a choking laugh. "What's that supposed to mean?!"

Denji flinched, raising his hands in defense. "Nothing! I swear!" His grin softened just a little. "Just that... it was really good." 

You smiled, tilting your head. "Better than anyone before?"

Denji hesitated for a second before admitting, "This was... actually my first time." His voice was genuine, almost shy.

Your eyes widened. "No way. You're Chainsaw Man. I don't believe it."

He let out a small, awkward laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, well... not a lot of people know that. Almost no one, actually."

You were caught off guard, realizing there was still so much about him you didn't know.

"You're serious?" You studied his face, searching for any sign that he was messing with you, but his expression was completely sincere.

He nodded. "Yeah." He glanced away for a moment before looking back at you. "I mean, maybe people assume, y'know, since I'm Chainsaw Man and all... but it just never really happened."

You blinked. "Never? Not even once?"

He scoffed. "Do I look like someone who's gotten any?" He shook his head, laughing under his breath. "I mean, I've always wanted to, and still do. Really bad. And I got close a couple times, but... it never ended up lasting, or really ever meant anything." His voice softened. "Not like this."

Your breath hitched slightly. You weren't sure what to say to that.

Denji must've noticed your hesitation because he quickly waved a hand, backpedaling. "Not that I'm sayin' this was, like, a big deal for you or anything! I mean, I dunno how you feel about it, and I don't wanna make things weird or pressure you or-"

You cut him off with a short laugh, shaking your head. "Denji."

"Huh?"

You leaned in, brushing a strand of messy blond hair from his face. "I'm gonna say this for the first time ever, but you talk too much."

His eyes widened slightly, but before he could respond, you pressed a slow, lingering kiss against his lips. He tensed for just a second before melting into it, his hands gripping your waist like he was afraid to let go.

You pulled away only slightly, your foreheads still touching, his breath warms against your skin. His hand rested beneath your head, supporting you as you lay on his bicep, the warmth of your bare bodies pressed against each other radiating between you.

"Hey," Denji said, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Hmm?" You murmured, glancing up at him.

"Nayuta's gonna kill me." He sighed, clearly frustrated.

"Oh..." You sat up, looking down at him. "You have to go?" You pouted, not wanting the moment to end just yet.

"Sadly, yeah," he replied, his voice heavy with reluctance. He shifted, sitting on the edge of the bed and letting out a loud sigh, as if trying to process everything that had just happened.

You nodded, a soft smile tugging at your lips. "Alright. Thanks, Denji." You stood up and handed him his pants. 

He paused for a second, glancing back at you. "Yeah, you too," he said slyly, before he grabbed you by the waist and pulled you in.

His lips met yours, soft yet filled with a sudden intensity, completely catching you off guard. It was usually you who made the moves, who took charge, but this time it was him, and it felt different, raw, unspoken.

You laughed, the tension breaking as you playfully nudged him. "Alright, alright. I don't want you to get in trouble."

Denji grinned, his usual energy returning. "Yeah, well, don't miss me too much." he teased you as he headed for your window, climbing into it.

"You know, I have this thing called a door," you said, crossing your arms and standing by the window, watching him awkwardly climb down.

"Uhh... yeah... I know..." Denji mumbled, clearly realizing his mistake but trying to salvage it. "It's just... more in character for me, y'know?"

Without missing a beat, he grabbed the edge of your lower window frame with one hand and started doing pull-ups, like it was the most normal thing in the world.

You couldn't help but laugh, shaking your head. "You're ridiculous, you know that?"

He flashed a grin between reps. "I've been called worse."

Chapter Text

You stayed there, lying on your bed after Denji left, staring blankly at the ceiling. The warmth of his touch still lingered on your skin, but it did little to stop the familiar weight pressing down on your chest.

It wasn't long before the feeling crept back in, the quiet, suffocating grief.

Yuto.

Your stomach twisted as his name echoed in your mind. The memories rushed in too fast, too sharp. His laughter. His small hands clinging to your sleeve. The way he used to look up at you with trust, with love, like you were his whole world.

And now, he was gone. You had such little time to process it.

Your breath hitched, and suddenly, the room felt too small, the sheets too heavy. You curled in on yourself, pressing a hand against your stomach as nausea swallowed you.

How could you?

How could you let yourself get so lost in the moment?

A wave of shame crashed over you as clarity settled in, the last traces of alcohol fading from your system. Grief is a weird concept. 

What did I just do? You thought to yourself.

Your breath caught in your throat as the realization hit. Just moments ago, you had been with Denji, touching him, tasting him, sucking him off, giving yourself to the moment like none of it mattered.

You couldn't take it anymore, the shame weighed on you in every possible way. Deep down, you knew this was all your own fault. 

You chased distractions, hoping that smoking and drinking would numb the guilt. But no matter what you tried, only one thing ever worked. Denji.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

Denji walked back home absentmindedly, his mind drifting as he replayed everything that had just happened. It felt almost unreal, like a dream he hadn't fully woken up from. His gaze was unfocused, staring ahead but not really seeing, his thoughts drowning out the world around him.

He flashed a proud grin, raising his fists in the air as if he'd just won a victory. He started skipping in joy, not being able to contain his excitement.

The streets grew darker with each step, the familiar glow of the city fading into nothing. Denji didn't notice at first, too lost in thought as he was celebrating inside his mind.

Not long after, he stopped in his tracks, glancing around as he noticed something was off. Not a single streetlight, no neon signs, no headlights in the distance, just an endless, swallowing black.

His pulse quickened. Turning around, he expected to see the faint lights of where he'd come from.

But there was nothing.

Just more darkness.

"Hey! Quit fucking with me and show yourself." He clenched his teeth, turning around and searching for anything in the suffocating darkness.

Laughter echoed in response, distant at first, then closing in, curling around him like unseen hands.

"I'll erase you from your own mind."

Denji's heart pounded, his thoughts spiraling as the laughter grew louder. It echoed around him, a low, mocking sound that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. He stumbled backwards, trying to hold onto anything that could tether him to reality.

"I... I'm..." He stuttered, his voice growing fainter, as if even speaking was becoming an impossibility. He reached out in desperation, calling for something, anything, that could pull him back.

"You're not even worth remembering." The voice mocked.

His breath hitched for a moment, but he quickly regained his composure, standing tall. "Who the hell are you? Another stupid devil?"

The laughter echoed, a haunting sound that sent chills down Denji's spine.

"The Erasure Devil."

Denji raised an eyebrow, unfazed. "That sounds lame. Nobody's afraid of erasers."

A cruel chuckle followed. "I'm not just a simple eraser, Denji. I erase memories. Connections. People. Everything you've ever cared about."

Denji's grin faltered for just a moment, a flicker of doubt clouding his thoughts. But he quickly recovered, scoffing. "Yeah, whatever. Remind me when you finish your little speech, I wanna go home." He yawned.

"You won't even remember you had anything to lose," the devil said, stepping closer, the darkness tightening around him. "Soon, nothing you care about will exist. Not even you."

Denji frowned, rolling his eyes as a clear sign of irritation. "What about the girl that just blew me?"

The devil's expression darkened, the amusement fading from its voice. "You really think this is a joke?" it yelled loudly, its tone cold and cutting.

"Nah, but I'd rather not have you erase her." Denji shrugged, his voice still casual despite the situation. "Can we just skip to the part where we fight, already?"

The devil chuckled. "Oh, no. We're not fighting."

The voice slithered into Denji's ear, cold and menacing. "I'm going to break you down, piece by piece, until you can't stand it anymore."

The darkness slowly faded and the familiar glow of the streetlights flickered back to life. Denji blinked, looking around in confusion as if the world had suddenly snapped back into place.

"Whatever." He yawned, shoving his hands in his pockets as he continued his walk home, acting as if nothing had happened.

He arrived home and walked toward the bed, relieved to see Nayuta sound asleep. Letting out a quiet sigh, he lay down beside her and the dogs, quickly drifting off.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The next morning came around and for some reason, Denji woke up earlier than usual for school. He lay in bed for a while, staring at the ceiling as last night's events replayed in his mind. Eventually, he sat up with a sigh, deciding it was better to get ready for school than to waste time lying awake.

Just as he finished getting dressed, a knock at the door caught his attention. He glanced through the peephole and saw... you standing outside.

Frowning in confusion, he straightened his uniform and ran a hand through his hair before opening the door. "Hey, what are you doing here so early-?"

Before he could finish, you lunged forward, gripping his arms as if to confirm he was real. "Are you alright?!"

He blinked. "...Yeah? Why wouldn't I be?"

You let out a sigh, pressing a hand to your forehead in embarrassment. "Sorry. I had this vision last night... like, foreshadowing. Something bad happening to you." You hesitated, looking away as you noticed his confused expression. 

The events of last night suddenly came rushing back to you, worry had nearly made you forget.

You straightened your voice and continued. "Last time I had one, it was about my brother. And I was right, unfortunately." Your voice dropped, and with another sigh, you turned to leave. "I... just wanted to check up on you. It's stupid, I'm sorry-"

"Come on in." He cut you off.

You hesitated before stepping inside. "Are you sure?" You glanced around warily. "I don't feel like getting murdered by Nayuta first thing in the morning."

He headed to the kitchen, grabbing a few ingredients. "Nah, don't worry 'bout her. That kid sleeps like a rock." He cracked some eggs into a heated pan, the sizzle filling the quiet apartment.

You stepped up beside him, resting your head on his shoulder with a playful smile. "You actually know how to cook?"

He grinned, a faint blush dusting his cheeks. "Well, money ain't exactly growing outta my ass." He flipped the eggs with a flick of his wrist. "If I could eat burgers and pizza every day, believe me, I would."

"Fair." The two of you stood in silence, watching the eggs cook like it was some high-stakes event. "Believe it or not, I still don't know how to cook."

He raised an eyebrow. "Haven't you been living alone for most of your life?" He said it so casually, like it was just a fact, no pity, no judgment.

You rolled your eyes, laughing as you slightly bumped your hip against his. "I would buy frozen pizza or ramen or some shit. Anything that didn't involve actual cooking."

You finally sat down at the table, watching as he set down two plates of scrambled eggs in front of you.

"So," he said, already stuffing his mouth, speaking between bites, "tell me about this vision. Did I die or something?"

Your stomach twisted. You didn't want to think about it, but his question lingered in the air, waiting.

"Well..." You stared down at your plate, pushing the eggs around with your fork. "I remember... actually, I didn't remember you at all."

He paused mid-chew, his brows knitting together.

"Nobody did." 

You lowered your gaze, shame creeping into your voice. "You were just... gone. From everyone's memories. Like you never even existed."

He swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. "You shouldn't joke about this."

"I'm not!" You waved your hands, denying, your voice rising with urgency. "I'm serious! Look!"

You flipped open your phone, scrolling through your call history with frantic fingers before handing it to him.

"Your name isn't anywhere."

He stared at the small screen, his usual carefree expression now replaced with worry. "Do you remember me?"

"Yeah, no shit."

"What's my name?"

Your breath hitched. The answer should've come easily, it was right there, on the tip of your tongue, but when you reached for it, there was nothing. Just a hollow blank space where it should be.

"I... Of course I know your name..." you stammered, but the words felt thin, fragile, like they'd shatter under their own weight.

"Okay, but in my defense, I still remember you," you said quickly, trying to ease the tension. "I mean, I couldn't sleep all night 'cause of stress, and I walked two kilometers just to check up on you."

He studied you for a moment, his chewing slowing. "Damn. That's kinda sweet."

You scoffed, crossing your arms. "Yeah, well, don't let it get to your head."

"You literally blew me not even over a day ago." He tried saying it casually, but still blushed, looking to the side.

You raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to bring this up all the time now?" 

He smiled, trying to hide his blush. "Maybe." 

You both finished your meal and stepped out of his apartment, the crisp morning air warming slightly with the promise of spring. As you walked side by side, you pulled out a cigarette pack, sliding one out before wordlessly offering it to Denji. He glanced at it but shook his head.

"What's gonna happen to me?" he muttered as you flicked your lighter, the flame briefly illuminating your face.

You took a slow drag, exhaling as you watched the smoke curl into the air. "I don't know. Has anything... unusual happened to you lately?"

Denji hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. "...Yeah," he admitted, voice tinged with embarrassment. "Ran into this devil. Called itself the Erasure Devil or something. But I thought it was bluffing, so I kinda just... brushed it off."

You raised an eyebrow, your voice sharpening with urgency. "So it's not just me hallucinating. I knew it."

"How do I get rid of it, then?! I don't want people forgettin' me! That's like, one of my biggest fears!" He shouted before straightening his voice. "I- I mean, not that I have any." 

You rolled your eyes at his stubborn pride. "If I had to guess, you didn't fight this devil, no?" You paused for a moment to think, extinguishing your cigarette on a pole beside you. "If not physically, maybe you're meant to defeat it mentally." 

Denji looked at you dumbfounded. "What the hell does that mean?" 

"Think about it." You watched his expression closely. "It can start by erasing your name, then people's memories of you... it could end up erasing yours too." 

Denji stared at you, his expression filled with concern. 

"B-but what do I know? Maybe it won't go that far." You waved your hands in the air and chuckled awkwardly to soothe the situation. 

You finally arrived at school and without thinking, sat down at the two desks right next to each other as you continued talking for a bit before the teacher came in.

As your mind wandered while the teacher droned on about boring lessons, your thoughts shifted to Denji. You couldn't help but smile inwardly, remembering how easy it was to be around him. He had a way of bringing out the best in you, and for the first time, you felt truly appreciated, like someone actually cared.

The whole class passed by in a blur as you thought about the weird dynamic between you two. You've been intimate with each other, yet never actually gone on a proper date. That realization stuck with you, and by the time the bell rang, you knew exactly what you wanted to do. You planned on asking him out after class. No more waiting.

The bell rang after what felt like an exhausting hour, signaling the start of lunch break. You took a deep breath, gathering the courage you'd built up throughout the class. With a smile, you turned to Denji, ready to finally ask him out.

But before you could say anything, your gaze shifted to an unfamiliar girl who appeared behind him and grabbed his shoulder.

"Denji. Come with me for a second?" she said with a smile that sent a chill down your spine.

Denji groaned in frustration. "Fumiko, I'm at school!"

"It's urgent. Please?" she coaxed, her hands gently caressing his shoulders. You could only stare at the scene, speechless.

Denji stood up, scowling. "Better be quick," he muttered, clearly irritated, before walking off with her.

You sat there, frozen for a moment, processing what just happened. It didn't make sense, and the knot in your stomach tightened. Shaking it off, you stood up and headed outside, needing some space.

You made your way to your usual smoking spot, leaning against the wall as you lit a cigarette. The situation still left you with a million questions. Probably Devil Hunter business, nothing to worry about, right? You thought. 

But there was something about the way she touched him. The way her hands sat on his shoulders... it made you sick. The anger bubbled up inside you, a hot wave of jealousy that you couldn't ignore.

You shook your head, trying to push the thoughts away. He isn't your boyfriend, you reminded yourself.

But you couldn't help but think, You still sucked him off, though. That had to mean something, right?

You clutched your head, sinking down to squat against the wall as your thoughts spiraled. The confusion and frustration ate away at you, and for a moment, you just sat there, overwhelmed.

You took a drag of your cigarette, the smoke curling in the air as you tried to push the unease aside. But then, your eyes shot wide open in shock.

You spotted her again, Fumi-something, shoving Denji against the wall, her hands gripping him as she kissed him fiercely, her hand roaming on his crotch. Denji seemed frozen for a moment, caught off guard, before he awkwardly pushed her away.

A rush of heat surged in your chest, followed by a sinking feeling in your stomach. It wasn't just jealousy, it was a sharp mix of frustration and disbelief. What the hell is she doing?

You gripped the cigarette tighter, watching as she flashed Denji a smug smile and walked away.

You felt that familiar knot in your gut, but this time, you refused to let it overwhelm you. You weren't going to act like some naive idiot about this. The sting of what you saw hurt, but you knew better than to let it control you. Denji wasn't yours, and you weren't about to let some random girl get under your skin like that.

You took another drag, exhaling slowly. You were better than letting this mess up your day. If Denji wanted to screw with some girl, that was on him.

Still, something about it gnawed at you, a feeling that wouldn't go away so easily.

You took one last long drag of your cigarette, savoring the burn in your lungs, before you crushed it against the school wall. The impact sent small flames jumping onto your hand, stinging your skin, but you barely flinched.

Chapter Text

"What's up with you?" Denji asked, tilting his head downward toward the desk to look at you. He sounded genuinely curious.

"Hm?" You quickly lifted your head, forcing a smile. "Nothing. What's up with you?"

Before Denji could respond, the teacher shot both of you a sharp glare. "Quiet down," he scolded before resuming the lesson.

You sank back in your seat, pretending to pay attention, but your thoughts were elsewhere.

You had every reason to be mad... right? It was clear there was something between you and Denji, something more than just friends.

But at the end of the day, you weren't officially together.

You kept reminding yourself of that, over and over, as if it would make a difference. You couldn't help but feel mad, you wouldn't do that to him. 

As the final class of the week ended, marking the start of the weekend, you hastily gathered your books in your arms. You didn't bother neatly packing them into your backpack, your only focus was getting out of there.

Denji turned to say something, but before he could get a word out, you were already storming off. He stood there, frozen, his finger half-raised in the air, left completely speechless.

He came out of the classroom after you and called your name, but you didn't stop. 

"I'm in a hurry, talk to you later!" you said, forcing a small smile. You turned around and walked backwards for a moment, meeting his eyes before turning around again and picking up your pace, leaving him behind.

You didn't hate him, not at all, but right now you just didn't feel like talking. He was still your only friend, or... potential boyfriend. Or something like that. 

You didn't want to lose him, neither as a friend nor romantic partner, but the image of that girl kissing him earlier made your stomach drop. It gnawed at you, hurting you both physically and emotionally. You needed space, time to think about everything. About him. 

There was no denying it. You were completely, hopelessly into him. But was he into you, too?

You sighed, closing your eyes for a moment as you massaged your temples. Lost in thought, you didn't realize you were still walking at full speed, until you collided with someone, sending them tumbling to the ground.

"Oh shit—sorry!" Your eyes snapped open as you grabbed your forehead, already extending a hand to help them up.

The girl looked up at you, her face unfamiliar yet strangely recognizable.

She took your hand and stood up, brushing herself off. "It's fine."

Still, guilt weighted on you. It felt like nothing ever seemed to go right for you. Nevertheless, sitting around whining about your problems wouldn't get you anywhere.

"Let me make it up to you. Coffee's on me...?" You raised an eyebrow and gestured with your hands, silently asking the question.

She blinked, surprised. Maybe she wasn't used to people being nice to her. "...Are you sure?" she asked, her voice louder now, as if she didn't quite believe it. She turned her gaze away, hesitant.

"Yeah. It's not like I have anything better to do," you admitted. Truthfully, you just didn't want to be alone right now, not until things got better. If they ever do.

You told her your name and offered a small smile.

She hesitated for a moment before responding. "Asa Mitaka."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"You sucked h—?!" 

"Shh!" You hissed, eyes darting around the café. Thankfully, no one seemed to be paying attention.

Feeling your face heat up, you awkwardly scratched your neck before taking a sip of your coffee, nearly choking on it. 

You spent the last two hours at a local café with Asa. Inviting her to hang out had been an impulsive decision, one you thought she would've declined, but to your surprise, you found that the two of you had more in common than you expected.

She wasn't as open as you, though. That was the biggest difference. It was clear she needed time to warm up to you. 

"You... actually did that to him?" She averted her gaze, disappointment flickering across her face. You noticed but chose to ignore it.

You chuckled quietly. "Yeah, not my proudest moment. It didn't help that it happened right after losing my little brother." The words stung, and just saying them made the weight of it all hit harder.

You felt like such a horrible person and you'd never be able to forgive yourself for that. Truth is, not one person is completely innocent or without regret, everyone has at least one thing they wished they could go back in time and prevent from happening.

You forced a smile, pushing the pain aside as you carried on.

"You know him? —Denji, I mean." You asked her.

"I've heard of him." She replied, her tone calm.

You continued talking and as the conversation went on, you noticed Asa becoming more comfortable with you. You weren't the only one leading the conversations anymore.

"How come you don't have any friends?" Asa asked, her face immediately dropping, realizing how it sounded.

"No, wait, I didn't mean it like that—"

"It's okay, I don't take it as criticism," you replied. "I think friendships should come naturally. For most of my life, every friendship I've had felt forced. Either I was pretending to be someone I wasn't, or they'd lose interest in me too quickly."

You tipped your head down to take a sip of your drink and looked up to find Asa watching you with her full attention.

"I can relate, I guess," she said with a small smile. "I think people see me as mean, which, to be honest, I can't judge them." she added, sighing. "But I think it's mostly because of my jealousy and not really fitting in."

She crossed her arms. "I still don't believe real friends exist, though."

You shrugged. "That's fair enough."

You spent another hour chatting about life experiences and events, the conversation flowing more easily than you'd expected. Asa was different from other girls, and that was exactly what made her stand out in a good way. You always had a habit of paying attention to the good aspects of people.

You noticed the sky begin to darken, the fading sunlight casting a different glow on everything around you. Flipping open your phone, you were taken aback, it was 7 PM already.

"We've been here for three hours? What the fuck?!" You slapped a hand over your mouth, feeling a bit embarrassed. It honestly felt like it had only been half an hour at most. Asa hummed in response, looking out the window.

"Well, I should get going. My apartment's still a mess ever since..." Your voice trailed off, the thought fading into the background. "Anyway... this was really fun. We should do this again." You offered a small smile.

"Yeah, definitely. Thanks, by the way." she replied, her tone sincere. "For inviting me." 

"Hey, don't worry, I said it's on me." You reached for your bag, hoping to find some forgotten money tucked away somewhere.

"No, no. I insist." Asa reached for her schoolbag, rummaging through it for her wallet. 

"Oh, shit..." Her eyes widened in panic. "I forgot my wallet at home!" She groaned, placing her hands on her head in frustration.

You opened your wallet and quickly realized you didn't have enough for yourself either, let alone the both of you.

You were about to start panicking before an idea popped into your head.

"Dine and dash?" You said with a grin, slowly tucking your wallet back into your pocket.

Asa looked horrified. "That's not rightful!" she hissed, her voice a mix of disbelief and shock.

"Asa, what's the last time you've done something rightful?" you replied, grabbing her hand and pulling her to her feet. You paused for a moment and turned back. "Here." You left whatever cash you had left on the table, making it look like you'd paid, before casually walking toward the door.

As soon as you reached the door, the waiter approached your table. You watched him begin counting the coins you'd left behind and panic hit you hard.

"Run," you whispered urgently.

Asa let out a startled scream, and you grabbed her hand, shoving the door open and taking off. You ran as fast as you could, the waiter's shouts echoing behind you. After a few minutes of sprinting, you were laughing hysterically while Asa was whining in panic. You finally slowed down to catch your breath as you crashed into each other. 

Asa let out an involuntary chuckle, and you pointed your finger at her with a grin.

"Come on, I know you enjoyed that." You said, breathlessly.

You exhaled a shaky breath, pulling out your pack of cigarettes and taking one out. As always, you offered one to Asa, watching as she declined, just like everyone else.

"You sure? It's not that bad." You flicked the lighter.

"I actually hate cigarettes. I can't stand the smell." Asa said, shuddering at the thought.

You chuckled at her reaction and impulsively blew a puff of smoke in her face. She immediately cursed at you, swatting the air in frustration.

You both walked home in the same direction, casually chatting along the way. The conversation flowed easily, and for the first time in what felt like a decade, you felt like you'd made a real friend, aside from Denji.

She was a bit awkward, but there was something comforting about it. The best people usually are.

Lost in the flow of conversation, you barely noticed your surroundings until you glanced up and realized you had arrived at your apartment complex.

"Oh," you murmured, slowing your pace. "Well... that's me." You gestured toward the building, a small hint of reluctance in your voice. 

"Hey, isn't that—?" Asa paused, pointing toward the entrance.

You turned your head, spotting Denji slumped on the doorstep, fast asleep. Had he been sitting there, waiting for you this whole time?

You pushed open the gate and walked over, standing directly in front of him. You stared down at him, waiting to see if he'd sense your presence and wake up. He didn't.

You reached out and tapped his shoulder, giving it a slight shake. He quickly stood up, dusting himself off before flashing you a wide grin.

"What are you..." You began speaking, but your words trailed off as he suddenly pulled a flower from behind his back, holding it up in front of your face.

Your expression softened and your heart fluttered. "Is this... for me?" you asked, a small smile tugging at your lips as you took the rose in your hands.

The flower looked oddly familiar. It took you a moment before you realized he had literally plucked it from your apartment building's yard.

You let out a quiet chuckle, shaking your head. At least he tried. You had to give him some credit for the effort.

Denji awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "Yeah... I just wanted to say sorry. For whatever I did that upset you."

You paused, your eyes drifting into the distance for a moment. A flicker of irritation sparked inside you, he didn't even know what he was apologizing for?

"What do you mean?" you asked, your brows furrowing.

Denji hesitated, stumbling over his words. "Well, I... figured you were mad at me, so... I wanted to make it up to you."

Your frown deepened. And here you thought you'd found someone mature, someone you could actually talk to about everything. 

"Are you serious?" you asked, your voice laced with frustration. You were tired of people treating you poorly, even when they didn't realize they were doing it.

You stared at the flower in your hand, exhaling a quiet sigh before stepping past him and pulling open the entrance door. "Thanks," you muttered, keeping your back to him.

"Hey," Denji took a step closer, his tone frustrated. "I waited out here for three hours while you were off doing god knows what, and all I get is a half-hearted 'thanks'?"

You turned on him, anger flashing in your eyes as you slammed the door shut. "Why do you even care?! Last time I saw you, you were behind the school with some girl's tongue down your throat!"

Denji stiffened, caught off guard, but you pushed on. "And if you have to know, I was with—" You gestured toward the street, only to pause when you realized it was empty. Asa was gone.

"Forget it," you muttered, turning back to the door and fumbling with your keys.

Denji's voice came low. "You can't just shut me out like this. I was there for you when no one else was."

"What do you want me to do?!" you shouted, your voice breaking as you fought to hold back the lump in your throat. You extended your arms and your eyes burned, but you refused to let the tears fall, not wanting to seem vulnerable.

Denji's expression softened, a flicker of concern in his eyes. "Look, it's fine," he said, hesitating before reaching out. His fingers brushed your arm before sliding down to take your hands gently in his. "I can explain—"

"No, I'm sure you can," you cut in, your voice quiet but firm. You took a shaky breath, blinking rapidly. "I just... I just need a break from everything right now. I'm sorry."

You sniffled, quickly looking away, afraid of what he might see in your face.

You leaned in and pressed your lips against his, bringing your arms to his chest. The kiss only lasted a few seconds, but in that brief moment, it felt as if time had completely stopped. You needed that, no matter how much you swore you didn't. 

You pulled back, avoiding eye contact as you quickly turned away. Without another word, you stepped inside and shut the door behind you, leaving him standing there, confused, baffled, and with his mouth slightly open.

You were tired of being pushed around, tired of people treating you however they pleased. It was time you'd put a stop to it.

As you climbed the stairs, a silent sob escaped your lips. You kept your head down, ignoring the curious glances from your neighbors. You let them stare, you didn't care anymore.

You reached your door, standing still for a moment. Some days, you were okay with coming home, but others, especially at night, the loneliness crept in. You could feel Yuto's absence like a heavy weight. Today was one of those days.

You stared at the door, frozen in place, biting your lip as you clenched your fists, trying to hold back the tears.

A sudden sharp pain made you jolt and you realized you had been gripping the rose Denji had given you, the thorns digging into your skin.

In that moment, it was as if every regret you'd ever had came crashing down all at once. The guilt for leaving Denji at your door hit you hard. He didn't deserve that. Hell, you didn't deserve him.

You leaned back against the door, sliding down until you were sitting on the floor. Closing your eyes, you let out quiet, shaky sobs. You needed a break, from everything.

You knew life wasn't easy for anyone, but why did it feel especially cruel to you? No matter how much love and care you gave, fate always found a way to stab you in the back and twist the knife just to make sure it hurt.

But when you were with Denji, it didn't feel that way. The weight of the past, the constant ache of loneliness, it all seemed to fade into the background. With him, you felt different, almost like you were reborn, as if you were stepping into a version of yourself that had been waiting to exist all along.

Impulsively, you stood up and ran back down the stairs, nearly tripping as you hurried toward the door. You yanked it open, your heart sinking when you saw the empty doorstep.

Your breath came in shallow, panicked gasps as you scanned the area. You hurried to the front porch, flinging the gate open and quickening your pace.

You didn't even know where you were headed. Maybe Denji's place, maybe not. All you knew was that you had to run. You found yourself darting down the middle of the street, moving on pure instinct.

You heard a low growl in the distance, followed by the frantic sounds of people screaming. You froze, the noise cutting through the air and reverberating in your chest. It took a moment for the reality of it to sink in, something was wrong.

Before you could process any further, a car honked loudly behind you, jolting you out of your thoughts. You let out a startled scream, your heart racing.

After a while, you finally reached the source of the screams, your blood running cold. A massive devil, a swirling cloud of black dust, was suffocating anyone it touched, rendering them unconscious one by one.

You darted through the chaos, weaving between panicked people before your eyes locked on him. Denji.

He stood motionless, staring at the devil with an empty, vacant expression. His mouth was slightly open, eyes lifeless, as if he couldn't even comprehend what was happening.

Without thinking, you pushed yourself harder, running toward him as fast as you could.

The devil's sinister laugh echoed through the air as it lunged toward Denji.

Your heart sank. "NO!" you screamed, the sound raw with desperation.

He didn't move. He was frozen. As you reached him, you saw a half chainsaw was embedded in his forehead, blood dripping from the wound, while the devil hunters struggled uselessly to stop the creature attacking him.

You didn't hesitate. You pushed Denji out of the way and grabbed his hand, pulling him with you. His hand was cold, too cold. His eyes were still distant, unblinking, staring off into nothing.

The devil screeched, its attention snapping to you as it saw you trying to flee with Denji and lunged toward you.

The devil slammed into the ground in front of you, causing the street to crack and chunks of concrete to fly through the air. Both you and Denji screamed, your hands gripping each other desperately.

Instinctively, you turned toward him, your voice urgent.

"Denji, look at me."

He blinked, his eyes slowly focusing on you. "You... you remember my name again?" he lowered his voice, a hint of disbelief in his voice. 

You took his hands, intertwining your fingers with his, and closed your eyes, focusing on the warmth of his touch.

A ripple of unseen energy surged outward from your body, cloaking you both in an ethereal veil. The air around you seemed to distort, bending the space between you and the devil. For a brief moment, you felt like you were fading, slipping between realities. When you opened your eyes again, the world around you was still, silent, and hidden from the devil's gaze.

The creature screeched, its blind rage still palpable, but it couldn't see you. You and Denji had vanished from its sight, lost within the fabric of the world, the Unknown Devil's power shielding you both from its perception.

You held Denji's hand tighter, knowing this wouldn't last long.

You pressed a finger to your lips, signaling Denji to stay quiet, and carefully led him behind a nearby abandoned building before setting him down. He was hurt, but nothing too severe, at least, not compared to what he'd been through before.

As you searched for wounds on his body, he watched you with tired, half-lidded eyes.

"You're alright, Denji. You're safe now." You murmured, breathless, as you gently sat down beside him.

The starry night stretched above you, eerily calm despite everything that had just happened. It reminded you of the night you drank alone on the rooftop, lost in your own thoughts. Your chest tightened, your eyes started to water but the tears didn't fall.

Denji let out a shaky breath. "Thanks."

You turned to him, surprised to see his eyes glistening too. Without thinking, you took his hand and placed a soft kiss on his knuckles.

"Why didn't you fight back?" you asked quietly, subtly wiping at your face.

Denji sniffed, his fingers tightening slightly around yours. "I was scared," he admitted, voice barely above a whisper. "It—" He swallowed hard. "It made my coworkers forget me. It made Nayuta forget me. She kicked me out like I was a stranger. It ruined my life." His stare was empty, fixed on nothing.

It was clear he was trying to hold back his tears, his voice trembling with each word, but he couldn't contain it, as tears slowly slipped from his eyes.

Your heart dropped. "No way..." You shook your head. "But I still remember you. How?"

Denji exhaled, a humorless chuckle escaping his lips. "Hell if I know."

You sat together in silence for a while, letting the tension slowly fade. Eventually, conversation came naturally, the two of you talking just to distract yourselves from everything that had happened.

At some point, Denji rested his head on your lap, his body finally relaxing. You absentmindedly ran your fingers through his hair, both of you gazing up at the stars, lost in the quiet comfort of the moment.

"You know, we've never actually been on a real date," you said with a small smile, glancing down at him.

Denji met your gaze with his tired eyes. "Then let's change that," he said. "Tomorrow night, you're all mine." He teased you.

You let out a genuine laugh and playfully smacked his chest. "Never say something so corny ever again."

Chapter Text

"Could you just... wait out here for a bit?" you asked, slipping through the door before Denji could peek inside.

Without waiting for a response, you shut it behind you, pressing your back against it with a sigh. The state of your apartment was embarrassing, a reflection of everything you'd been avoiding.

You took a deep breath and looked around before getting to work.

Ten minutes later, the place wasn't spotless, but at least it looked presentable. You shoved stray clothes into the closet and hurriedly wiped down surfaces with the sleeve of your shirt. 

The hardest part was moving Yuto's things. His books, his toys, his clothes, each item felt heavier than it should, weighted with memories you weren't ready to face. A lump formed in your throat, tightening with every piece you picked up.

You tried to blink away the tears, but they fell anyway, silent and relentless. Swallowing the ache in your chest, you carefully placed everything into a storage drawer, your fingers hovering over his stuff before closing the drawer and turning away.

It didn't feel right to pack them away, but leaving them out hurt even more.

With a final tug, you straightened the bed sheets, completing the last task before you could finally let someone into your space.

You hurried to the front door and swung it open, to find Denji sitting on the floor, his head tilted back as he stared at the ceiling.

"I'm done," you exhaled, slightly out of breath. "Sorry for the wait."

Denji had nowhere to go that night. Nayuta, affected by the devil's work, had started screaming and kicked him out, not recognizing him. So, you did what you had to do, return the favor.

Denji grinned and hopped to his feet, stepping inside without hesitation. His eyes wandered curiously over your apartment before he plopped down onto the couch.

You pulled out a cigarette, lighting it as you walked over to your CD player. "Hope you don't mind if I smoke in here."

Denji shrugged, watching you. "Nah, but won't you get in trouble for it?"

Clamping the cigarette between your teeth, you flipped through your collection, searching for the right CD. "I cover half the rent with my student loan. If they try to kick me out over a little smoke, I'll make sure they regret it."

Denji chuckled, covering his mouth as if to steady himself. "Woah, didn't realize who I'm talking to."

You gasped in offense, grabbing a CD case and chucking it at him. He yelped, laughing as he caught it and tossed it right back. 

You slid the CD into the player, the familiar sound filling the room as you swayed to the beat.

"You seriously need to get into this," you said pointing to the player as you headed toward the kitchen to throw together a quick meal. You were starving, him too, probably. 

Denji stretched his arms over his head, letting out a satisfied groan. "Maybe," he yawned, his shirt stretching just right around his toned biceps.

Your whisking slowed as your eyes flicked to his arms, tracing the way his muscles tensed. Realizing what you were doing, you quickly turned back to the stove, hoping he didn't notice the sudden warmth creeping up your face.

Denji bounced around the couch to face you, childishly excited. "What're you making? Smells good." His eyes were filled with hunger, saliva practically dripping from his mouth.

You hesitated for a moment, glancing away in embarrassment. "...The only thing I know how to make." You said while reading the spaghetti instructions on the back of the package.

Denji groaned. "Ugh, am I gonna eat burned food?"

You gasped, whipping around to face him with your arms crossed. "No food for you, then."

Denji immediately whined. "No! I was kidding!"

You scooped the spaghetti onto two plates after it was done boiling and added the sauce, which, to your surprise wasn't burned. You walked over and plopped down next to Denji, handing him his food.

His eyes lit up as he instantly started slurping it down, finishing everything in under two minutes. You barely ate the first bite, too busy staring at him in shock.

You finished eating and sighed, tilting your head back. "I'm stuffed. I definitely made too much."

Denji nodded. "Yeah, you can never get the amount right."

You both sat in a comfortable silence for a moment as you stared at the ceiling, the background music filling the air.

You exhaled deeply. "I gotta shower," you said, hopping to your feet.

Denji grinned, leaning his head back on the couch. "Need any help with that?"

You choked on your own spit. "No!" You kicked his foot, grabbing your bathrobe from the hanger and making your way to the bathroom.

The shower was probably the most private place you could be in. You took a full-body shower, finding comfort in letting your feelings out.

You needed a deep cleanse, both inside and out, and letting your emotions flow down the drain was your way of coping.

Once you were done, you stepped out and wiped the foggy mirror with your hand, not surprised to find your makeup completely smudged around your eyes. You cleaned your face and slipped into your freshly washed pajamas before drying your hair and finally stepping out of the bathroom.

"Hey De—" you called out, but all you heard was faint snoring along with the hum of the CD player in the background as it repeat itself. 

You walked over to the couch quietly, a smile growing on your lips as you looked down. Denji was curled up, hugging a pillow, snoring with his mouth open as drool dripped from the corner of his lips.

You quietly walked over and turned off the CD player before heading to Denji.

"Denji. Go sleep in the bed, I'll sleep here," you whispered, leaning over him.

He mumbled something incomprehensible in response, so you gently took his free hand and tried to pull him up.

To your dismay, he only mumbled more and yanked you toward him with surprising strength. You gasped as you tumbled forward, landing right on top of him.

You spent the last few minutes trying to free your hand from his grip, but it was useless.

"Fuck's sake..." you muttered under your breath, finally giving up and slumping against him again.

With a careful tug, you managed to shift him just enough to sit up. You grabbed a pillow, gently placing it under Denji's head before slowly lying down beside him, finally slipping your hand free.

His head naturally found its place against your chest, and you let your own rest atop his. Instinctively, you ran your fingers through his hair, feeling the warmth of his breath against your skin as a flush crept up your face. 

You cupped his cheek, your thumb tracing slow, gentle circles as you quietly admired him. Eventually, you drifted off, the warmth of his body calming you.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The next day rolled around, and by the time afternoon came by, you had to force yourself out of bed and lazily throw on a jacket as you headed outside, the crisp air nipping at your skin as you made your way down the street. 

Grocery shopping wasn't something you particularly looked forward to, but after last night, something in you had shifted. Maybe Denji was right. Maybe it was time to try, to stop living off instant food and actually learn how to cook something decent for once.

Your life was far from perfect. Hell, it barely felt livable some days. But giving up just because you were miserable? That would be the easy way out, and if nothing else, you weren't a coward. You'd keep pushing forward, even if it felt pointless.

The store was quiet, just the occasional chatter of other shoppers and the hum of refrigerators filling the air. You moved quickly through the aisles, hoping no one would look too closely at your tired face, your unbrushed hair, the slightly wrinkled jacket you had thrown on without thinking.

Denji had left earlier that morning, saying he needed to get back home to see Nayuta. You didn't ask questions. You figured if he wanted to tell you more, he would. Still, a strange sort of emptiness had settled over you once he was gone, like the warmth he left behind had been snuffed out too soon.

But you'd see him again tonight. He asked you out, after all. You smiled to yourself at the thought. 

Your fingers brushed over a can of soup on a shelf, and without thinking, picked it up. Your eyes scanned the ingredients list and you frowned. Processed junk. Preservatives. Artificial flavors.

With a small shake of your head, you placed it back. No more canned food. If you were going to do this, you'd do it right.

You turned your head and couldn't help but notice the neatly stacked packs of condoms and lube sitting right beside the canned soup. A quiet chuckle escaped you—out of all things? You thought.

Just as you turned to keep walking, a sudden force slammed into your shoulder, nearly knocking you off balance, making a few of the cans fall to the ground. A sharp, unexpected pain shot through you, and you instinctively grabbed at the sore spot, wincing.

"Shit—" The words barely left your mouth before something even colder cut through the air. You bent down and started picking up the cans, hoping none of them spilled. 

"You really think he'd choose you?"

A whisper, that slithered into your ears, curling around your ribs, sinking into the pit of your stomach. 

You froze, before slowly turning your head, searching for the person who had spoken.

But there was no one there.

Your eyes darted down the aisle, scanning the faces of the other shoppers. A mother and her child near the produce section. An elderly man inspecting a box of cereal. A bored-looking cashier at the register.

None of them were close enough to have whispered in your ear. None of them even seemed to notice you.

Yet the words echoed in your mind, repeating over and over.

"You really think he'd choose you?"

Your fingers curled tighter around your shoulder as unease slithered through your veins.

Had you imagined it? Was your mind playing tricks on you? Or was something or someone really there?

Who was he? Was it Denji? Who was sending you threats?

A sudden wave of anger flared up inside you, no matter how much you tried to suppress it. You hated the thought of sharing Denji, but that was something you'd never admit. Not to anyone. Not even to yourself.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"Coming!"

You called out as the doorbell rang, fumbling to put on your earrings as you hurried over. Your heart gave an unexpected thump in your chest, not that you'd acknowledge it.

Swinging the door open, you were immediately met with Denji's face and just like that, your mood lifted.

He stood there, slightly awkward, dressed in a white button-up and a loosely tied tie. The fabric was slightly wrinkled, as if he had either slept in it or didn't really know how to iron, probably both. His face was flushed a deep red, and his hands fidgeted at his sides.

"Uh... hey," he muttered, avoiding eye contact. "I, uh—I wore a tie. Fancy, right?"

You bit back a smile. "Very fancy." 

Denji grinned, clearly pleased with himself. "Yeah, well, took me like ten minutes to figure out how to tie this stupid thing." He looked down and started fumbling with it.

You crossed your arms, observing his crooked tie. "Let me—" You stepped closer, reaching for it without thinking. 

You finished adjusting his tie, smoothing it down with your fingers. But before letting go, you gave it a firm tug, pulling him forward and into your apartment.

He grunted in surprise as you let out a laugh.

You led him to the couch and he dropped onto it without hesitation, like he always did.

"Just wait here for a bit, I'll be ready in a few." You led him to your couch as he plopped down on it like always.

With a dramatic sigh, he muttered, "Am I gonna spend my whole life waiting on you?"

You gasped, feigning offense. "Excuse me? You don't want me to look good for you?"

Denji blinked, his mouth slightly open as if he hadn't expected that. Then a lazy grin spread across his face. "I mean... you already do."

You stared at him in surprise, not expecting that response. A small chuckle escaped your lips before you shook your head and made your way to your room.

A few minutes later, you stepped out again, shifting uncomfortably.

"Ugh... Denji, I can't get this stupid zipper up. Help me out?" You huffed, reaching awkwardly behind you in a futile attempt.

Denji glanced up as you approached, his eyes widening slightly before he quickly looked away. "Uh... yeah, sure."

You sat beside him, turning your back so he could reach and flipping your hair to the front. His hands hovered uncertainly for a moment before he swallowed hard and grasped the zipper, pulling it up slowly.

His fingers brushed lightly against your skin, and he hesitated, suddenly hyper-aware of the warmth radiating from you. His gaze flickered down, taking in the way the dress hugged your figure, and he had to bite his tongue to keep from saying something stupid.

"There," he muttered, voice a little rougher than usual as he let go.

You glanced over your shoulder, catching the way he quickly averted his eyes. "Thanks!" you said with a grin, before your eyes instinctively flickered downward, only to catch the painful boner in his pants.

Your grin widened as you playfully poked at it with your finger, watching as it twitched in response. That was all it took to send you into a fit of laughter.

Denji, however, wasn't nearly as amused. His face turned bright red as he jolted back, eyes wide with shock. He jerked his hands up slightly, glancing down at his crotch as if hoping it wasn't as obvious as it felt.

"H-Hey! Don't mess with it like that!" he stammered, his voice cracking slightly as he scrambled for words.

"Yeah, yeah." You chuckled as you stood up, walking over to grab your jacket. "Wait... where are we going again?"

Denji blinked. "Uh... I thought you had that planned."

You froze, spinning on your heel. "What?! No, I didn't! I thought you did!" Groaning, you pressed your hands to your head. "Oh, god. Where could we go that's cheap enough for both of us?"

Denji pushed himself up from the couch, stretching before sauntering over to you with a lopsided grin. "Don't sweat it. My treat."

You raised a brow. "Denji, I know exactly how much money you have, and it's not enough to be saying stuff like that."

He waved a hand dismissively. "Nah, nah, I got this." 

You wrapped a scarf around your neck and slipped on your jacket, flashing him a small smirk. "Guess I owe you one," you teased, making your way to the front door while fumbling with your keys.

Denji trailed behind you, running a hand through his hair before mumbling under his breath, "Man... I need to jerk off now..." 

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"You what?!" You slammed your hand on the table, nearly choking on your drink. "God, you're such a pervert."

Denji just shrugged, completely unfazed. "Hey, I'm just being honest."

You scoffed. "Yeah, well, saving only women doesn't make you a hero, you know."

Denji smirked. "Oh yeah? Well, Napoleon killed a bunch of people, and people still call him a hero."

You raised an eyebrow. "Didn't think you had any knowledge of Napoleon."

He grinned. "I don't. I just read that one fact right before my history test and somehow it stuck." He took a sip of his water. 

You rolled your eyes with a chuckle just as the waiter set down your food.

Denji's eyes lit up instantly. He licked his lips and without hesitation dug in like a man starved.

You stared at him, brows furrowed in disbelief. "Do you always eat like this on your dates?" you asked, amused, before picking up your chopsticks and snapping them apart.

Denji barely paused to glance up at you, his mouth still full. "Huh? This is me being fancy." 

You tilted your head, watching him eat with a blank expression.

You swallowed hard, finally forcing yourself to ask the uncomfortable question that had been nagging at you all day. 

"Can I ask what happened with Nayuta? Or anyone, for that matter?" You finally spoke, casually picking up some food with your chopsticks.

Denji paused mid-bite, chewing a little slower before swallowing hard. He wiped his mouth with his palm, avoiding your gaze.

"Nothing. Same old, same old," he muttered, eyes fixed on his plate.

You frowned. "Isn't it kinda weird how I'm the only one who recognizes you?"

The moment the words left your mouth, something clicked.

You weren't the only one who remembered Denji.

Asa.

That day when you were walking home together, she pointed at him. She recognized him.

Things just got way more confusing.

Denji said something, but you barely heard him. Your mind was spinning, connecting dots you didn't even realize existed before.

"Hey." His voice pulled you back. You blinked, only to find him leaning in slightly, his sharp eyes studying you. "Something on your mind?"

"No..." You absently pushed your chopsticks around on your plate. "Actually, yeah."

Denji raised an eyebrow. "That was convincing."

You gulped, straightening up. "I just remembered something."

Denji kept chewing, waiting for you to continue.

"Remember when you dozed off on my stairs waiting for me?"

His eyes narrowed slightly. "Not my proudest moment, but yeah. What about it?"

You hesitated before leaning in. "Asa. Asa Mitaka. Do you know her?"

Denji scoffed. "Yeah. She's weird." He popped another bite of food into his mouth. "Called me a loser one time."

You leaned back in your chair, staring down at your plate as your thoughts swirled. "She recognized you too."

Denji furrowed his brows. "Huh? What's that supposed to mean?"

You fell silent, piecing it together. Asa recognized Denji, just like you did. And the Erasure Devil's power had erased him from everyone's memory, except yours. And hers, as it seems.

So what did you and Asa have in common?

A thought crept into your mind, so absurd it made your face heat up.

Does... does she like him?

You exhaled sharply, leaning forward again. "This might sound insane, but hear me out."

Denji tilted his head. "I'm listening."

You swallowed, suddenly embarrassed. "It's just a theory, okay?" You scratched the back of your neck, avoiding his gaze.

He rolled his eyes. "Just spit it out already."

You sighed. "What if... the only people who remember you are the ones who, um... like you? Romantically?"

Chapter Text

"You... like me?" Denji blinked, his eyes wide. 

You tilted your head, a genuine smile on your face. "Was that not obvious?" 

You spent most of your night out lost in conversation. Normally, it felt like your mind was racing a mile a minute, yet somehow, with him, it never felt overwhelming. He was easy to talk to, open, unfiltered, and for some reason, you found yourself trusting him without any hesitation.

You laughed, easily distracted by everything around you, the wine you ordered only making it harder to keep your emotions in check. Before you knew it, the words spilled from your lips faster than you could stop them.

Your laughter faded as you lowered your eyes, your expression turning solemn. "What's the right way to cope with grief, Denji?" You said out of the blue, almost desperate.

Denji's mouth curved slightly downward, a faint frown crossing his face, clearly confused by your suddenness. "I dunno. Never figured it out."

He rested his cheek against his hand, eyes distant. "Guess there's no right way. Just gotta deal with it however you can. If you can." 

You exhaled deeply and leaned back. "It's weird... I feel like there's something wrong with me. Like, I tell myself I should be miserable all the time, and when I'm not, I feel guilty about it."

You glanced to the side, your voice quieter now. "Most days, I feel awful. But the moments I don't, it's like I won't even let myself enjoy it, like I don't deserve to."

"I get it." He hummed, looking directly into your eyes. "I think it's useless to beat yourself up for everything. Shit happens whether you like it or not, and you can't change it once it's done. It's the harsh truth."

Denji sighed, gesturing toward himself. "I mean, just look at me. I've lost everyone and everything I ever had, and I'm still here. Life's too short to worry about that stuff." He smiled faintly to reassure you. 

You snorted and rolled your eyes. "Yeah, maybe mine is. You've got all the time in the world."

"Who knows... aren't you a devil hybrid too?" He glanced at you.

You paused, thinking it over. "Wait... you're right." The realization hit you. "Does that mean I'm immortal?"

Denji raised an eyebrow, a playful glint in his eyes. "Could be. I don't know your abilities or contracts." He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. "Come on, I wanna see what else you can do." He winced like an eager kid.

You looked around and whispered, "Not here!"

You spent another hour or so at the restaurant. The place wasn't anything too fancy, but it wasn't a cheap dive either, just the right kind of place. Comfortable. Easy.

When the bill came, you and Denji, naturally, got into a petty argument over who should pay your end of the meal. To your surprise, he won out in the end, slapping his cash down without hesitation. You hadn't thought of him as the type.

As you stepped outside, the crisp air of early spring brushed against your skin. It was that time of year when the days were warm and inviting, but the nights sliced through you like a blade.

You bumped into him intentionally as you walked down the street. "That was fun." You smiled up at him.

"Yeah, real fun, except for the part where you won't even show me your powers." He rolled his eyes sarcastically.

You laughed. "Fine!" Stopping in your tracks, you shut your eyes dramatically. With a flourish of your hands, just like they do in the movies, you pretended to be in deep concentration.

"I'll make your dick disappear. Right about..."

Denji immediately shot a panicked look at you. "Okay, okay, stop! Not that one! Please!" He winced and fell to his knees, grabbing his crotch to check if it's still there.

You chuckled, tilting your head as you hummed in thought and gave Denji a hand to stand up. "Alright. See that guy over there?" You gestured toward a bystander leaning against a pole.

Denji followed your finger. "That one?" He pointed at him.

You nodded. "Watch."

Fixing your gaze on the man, you willed your power into action. In an instant, his features shifted, morphing until he was the spitting image of Denji.

Denji jolted back. "What the fuck?!" He shouted, blinking rapidly, as if trying to reset his own vision.

You smiled. "Liked that?"

Denji snorted. "Hell no! That just means he's the second most attractive guy around."

You rolled your eyes. "Oh yeah? And who would be the first?"

He grinned, jabbing a thumb at himself. "Me, obviously."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

Before you knew it, Monday rolled around again, and you were back to being miserable. Nothing stressed you out more than school, the competition was fierce, and it felt like everyone was always one step ahead.

Denji was absent from school that day, and you made a mental note to call him later to check in. Maybe things with Nayuta had gotten better?

When the bell rang, you instinctively stood up and started making your way to your usual smoke spot, eager to ease your nerves. 

The moment you arrived, though, you lifted your head to a surprise.

The whole place was barricaded and a bright construction sign stood in front of it like a cruel joke. You stared in disbelief before letting out a frustrated grunt.

Just perfect. Now where were you supposed to go?

You kicked the ground in frustration, shoving your hands into your pockets as you walked away.

Exiting the school gates meant you had even less time to smoke now that you had to do it off school grounds. Just as you stepped outside, your eyes landed on someone familiar. Asa.

Your frown faded, and you instinctively smiled at her, until your conversation with Denji flashed through your mind. The one where you'd suggested Asa might have a thing for him.

"Hey. What's up?" You forced a smile, hoping it didn't look as fake as it felt.

She shrugged. "Just grabbed some food. Where are you going?"

You hesitated for a second. "Uh... to smoke?" You steadied your breath. "...Wanna join?"

The words left your mouth before you could stop them, and regret hit instantly. You cringed but tried to play it off.

Asa blinked, clearly caught off guard. "Uh... sure."

You walked together until you spotted a nearby bench. Without a word, you sat down, Asa following suit as she casually unwrapped her food.

Pulling out your cigarette pack, you slid one out, lit it, and took a slow inhale. The tension in your body eased almost instantly.

You let out a thoughtful hum, eager to break the uncomfortable silence which wasn't something you had to worry about the last time you were together. "Do you know where Denji is today by any chance?"

Asa suddenly coughed on her food, still mid-chew. "I don't, sorry."

You sucked your teeth and frowned.

"Wait, actually..." Asa turned to you, thinking. "I think he mentioned he's busy with some important devil work right now."

"Yeah, figured," you mumbled, exhaling smoke.

She hesitated before adding, "Well... after that, though, he asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with him. His job today must be especially tough." 

You blinked, snapping your gaze to her. "Hold on—how do you know he's involved with devils?"

You tried to ignore the part where she mentioned the movie invite, the ache in your chest only tightening.

She sighed, then slowly turned to you, locking eyes as a creepy smile crept across her face.

"We're close, y'know," she said, her voice almost teasing. "He tells me all his secrets... trusts me more than anyone." 

She leaned in closer, and you instinctively stiffened, eyes wide.

"What's that supposed to mean?" you asked, a frown forming as you subtly scooted away from her.

Asa chuckled and straightened up, her expression unreadable. "I mean... we've kissed, like, dozens of times. He even asked me to be his girlfriend." She paused, tilting her head slightly. "But I declined."

Her smile never wavered. 

The shock that had gripped you moments ago twisted into anger, the word 'girlfriend' spiraling in your mind as you failed to collect your thoughts. 

"Asa, what the fuck?" you snapped, pushing yourself up from the bench. It took everything in you to stand your ground. "You know how I feel about him. Shut your goddamn mouth and stop lying." You started shaking from frustration, your fists clenching instinctively. 

She only laughed, shaking her head. "Oh, stop. Ask him where he is tonight. See if he's free." Crossing her arms, she tilted her chin up at you. "Go ahead."

Jaw clenched, you yanked out your flip phone and fired off a quick text to Denji before shoving it back into your pocket.

"Whatever," you muttered, flicking your cigarette butt toward her shoes. It missed, not that it mattered. Without another word, you turned and walked away. You weren't going to believe her.

This only confirmed your suspicion, Asa wanted Denji all to herself. You weren't going to let anyone walk all over you just to get what they wanted.

Class started and you took your seat, still fuming at the fact that she thought she could've fooled you that easily. A buzz in your back pocket made you pause, and you started debating over taking it out in class and risk getting scolded. 

You pulled out your flip phone and the moment you saw Denji's name on the screen, your heart skipped a beat. 

"sory, devil busines."

You weren't sure which was worse, the fact that he could only spell a single word right or the fact that she was right. Asa was right.

If she was right about this, then what else had she been right about?

The kisses? The whole girlfriend thing?

You sank into your seat and crossed your arms, a familiar ache in your stomach appearing.

You couldn't cry here. Not now.

Everything was falling apart, and it felt like fate had nothing left for you but disappointment. If you even could get disappointed anymore.

You couldn't feel a single emotion other than pure fury. You were being used all over again.

You started to think of ways to get him back, but quickly realized it wasn't worth it. You needed to focus on yourself first, to heal and grow, before committing or getting attached to anyone else again.

An impulsive idea popped into your head and you decided to go to the mall after school. Even if it meant blowing the rest of your cash, you didn't care. You just wanted to feel different, new. 

The moment class ended, you stormed out, barely registering your surroundings. You rushed home, changed as quickly as possible, and headed straight to the bus stop without a second thought.

The bright lights of the mall buzzed overhead as you walked through racks of clothing, the weight in your chest slowly lifting with each step. The scent of new fabric and faint traces of overpriced perfume filled the air, and for the first time all day, you felt a spark of something other than anger, excitement. You rarely had the time and money to go shopping.

You grabbed a handful of outfits without thinking too hard, letting yourself indulge. A sleek jacket that made you look effortlessly mysterious. A dress that clung in all the right places. Something bold, something different. Maybe if you looked new, you'd feel new too.

Inside the fitting room, you studied your reflection in the mirror. The first outfit, a leather jacket, since you were in desperate need of a new one. You tilted your head, running a hand through your hair. "Not bad..." you murmured, striking a pose just for the hell of it.

The next outfit was a slick, long dress. Something daring, something you wouldn't casually wear. You stepped out of the fitting room just to see yourself in the bigger mirror.

"Damn," you muttered. It was different. Bold.

For a moment, lost in the thrill of trying on new things, you forgot about Denji, Asa, and everything that had pissed you off. Here, right now, it was just you. And you looked good. 

You bought the clothes, and as you were headed out, you "accidentally" slipped a ring into your pocket when no one was looking.

You wandered through the mall, searching for a spot to smoke and soothe your nerves, when you spotted a sign pointing to a balcony. Instantly, your mood lifted, and for a moment, it felt like you were on top of the world.

You arrived at the balcony and reached for the door handle, but something across from you caught your eye, a striking red sign for the movies. Before you could even realize it, you found yourself turning in that direction instead.

Your heart dropped when you saw the one thing you'd hoped to avoid, a familiar figure. Two familiar figures.

Walking next to each other.

Your pulse quickened, blood rushing to your face as your anger flared. You weren't holding back anymore.

You stormed towards them, catching up just as you reached the cinema. Without a second thought, you threw your bags on the ground, the thump drawing Asa's attention as she turned to face you.

At the same time, Denji turned around, his eyes widening in surprise. He flashed you a grin, though you couldn't see in that moment that it was probably genuine.

His smile faded the moment he saw you storming towards him, causing him to turn fully in your direction. He started walking backward, fumbling as his phone slipped from his hand and dropped to the ground, making more people's attention in the room turn to you.

You slowed your pace, your voice sharp as you pointed a finger at his face. "I fucking knew it." you spat, your eyes beginning to water slightly. "I knew you were just like the others."

Denji shot you a confused glare, raising his hands in the air. "Wait, slow down, what are you—"

The fact that he acted like he didn't understand what he'd done wrong made you fume. "Oh!" You let out a bitter laugh. "So, Chainsaw Man is smart enough to win against every devil out there but can't figure out what the hell he's done wrong with a girl who would fucking kill for him?" His eyes widened as soon as you mentioned Chainsaw Man, making him look around frantically. 

"What are you— shut the fuck up!" Denji snapped, halting in his tracks. He slammed his hand over your mouth, making you flinch. But that wasn't the end of it.

"Mmph—Chnsaw mn—" You tried to speak, but his hand muffled your words, your voice barely audible.

With a firm grip, Denji wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close as your head rested against his shoulder. His hand stayed over your mouth, silencing any attempt to speak. Without a word, he started walking quickly through the cinema, dragging you along. You struggled against his hold, desperate to break free, but all you could do was be pulled along, helpless to stop him.

You managed to quickly grab the bags of clothing you had just bought from the ground, relief washing over you for a moment as you held them tightly.

He finally released his grip on your mouth, and you inhaled sharply, coughing as air rushed back into your lungs. You walked toward a more private area, but just as you were about to get some space, he grabbed your arm and kept storming forward, heading toward the exit.

"Slow down!" you shouted, trying to catch up to him. "Are you trying to suffocate me—?!"

Denji gritted his teeth, his voice low and dangerous. "Another word from you and you're dead."

You furrowed your brows, confused and angry. "Are you insane?" You yanked at your arm, trying to break free, but he only tightened his grip, refusing to let you go.

You finally made it outside the mall, the sky already dark, and the only thing you could make out of Denji's face was the dim outline. But that was the least of your concerns. It was pouring rain, soaking through your clothes, and your emotions were just as drenched.

Denji spat to the side, water dripping from his blonde hair as it stuck to his cheeks and neck. He turned to face you, his voice raised to compete with the sound of the downpour.

"What's this about?" he shouted. "Calling me Chainsaw Man in front of strangers?! Are you out of your mind?"

"I thought you didn't care if I called you Chainsaw Man! Last time I remember, your horny ass said he wanted everyone to know so he could have his dick stuck up some bitch's ass!" You threw your arms up and  leaned closer as you yelled in his face.

Denji looked down. “You wouldn’t understand.” He said quietly, but you ignored it.”

You breathed heavily, your voice barely above a whisper. "And why do you keep saying that... What do you mean you 'don't know'?" You ran a hand across your forehead, trying to hide your tears, but they mixed with the rain. "Just leave it, Denji." Your eyes dropped to the nearly dissolved paper bag in your hand, your fingers gripping it weakly as you turned to walk away.

Denji grabbed your hand again, his grip firm but not forceful. Out of shock, your eyes met his, and for a moment, everything else, the rain, the cold, the anger, it blurred into the background. His face was drenched, water streaming down his cheeks, his mouth slightly open, his wide eyes reflecting something between desperation and disbelief.

"Wait. Don't leave," he said, his voice unsteady, barely audible over the rain. "What happened?" 

You shut your eyes, trying to hold yourself together, but the anger and hurt clawed their way out anyway. 

"I cared about you," you choked out, your voice unsteady. Tears blurred your vision as you met his eyes. "You were the only person who made me feel sane... like I belonged." Your gaze dropped to the ground. "How could you do this to me?"

Denji's face twisted into something miserable, sad, shocked, almost desperate. "I... don't understand—"

Before he could finish, the door behind him creaked open, and there she was. The star of the night.

You exhaled sharply, rolling your eyes the second you saw her.

"Uhh, can I butt in?" Asa asked hesitantly, half-hidden behind the door, her voice softer than usual.

You looked up at Denji, then back at her, and let out a hollow, almost hysterical laugh.

You turned away, scoffing. "Whatever, I'll just let you two make out in the rain since that's what you want so badly." You chuckled bitterly, your feet already moving away. Denji mumbled something under his breath, but you didn't bother to listen.

Before you could go any further, Asa stepped behind you, tapping your shoulder gently. "Hey... I'm—"

"Don't fucking touch me!" You snapped, spinning around and kicking her in the stomach. She stumbled backward, falling into a puddle with a splash. 

You froze for a moment, watching as Denji helped Asa up from the puddle. The sight stung, but it didn't surprise you. You knew him too well by now. He'd always rush to help someone else, even when it wasn't deserved.

As you continued walking through the rain, your thoughts darkened. The weight of everything pressing on you, Denji and Asa's betrayal, your constant failures, it made it hard to breathe. You couldn't help but think how much easier everything would've been if you had just given up when your brother died. No more pain, no more disappointment.

But of course, life wasn't that simple, was it? Every time you thought you might get a break, something or someone would tear you back down.

"Hey!" A familiar voice called out behind you, but you kept walking, refusing to look at him, your gaze fixed infront. "Please, tell me what I did wrong. I swear it won't happen again."

You scoffed. "The fact that it happened at all is the problem. I don't put up with disrespect. Not anymore."

Denji quickened his pace, his breath shaky. "Do you... need a break from me, or something?"

You hesitated for a moment before nodding.

Denji stopped in his tracks, shocked, as he watched you continue walking in the rain, knowing that with every second that passed, it was the closest you would ever be again.

Chapter Text

TIME SKIP

October 29th 1999

You heard the door creak open and your heart froze.

Peeking through the doorway, you braced yourself for the worst, only to find a familiar figure standing there like he owned the place.

You let out a sharp sigh. "Yoshida, ever heard of knocking?" You opened the door to your room and walked towards him.

He stepped inside fully, shutting the door behind him like he belonged there. "Figured you wouldn't answer, so I skipped the hassle." His eyes flicked over you. "Wow. You look awful."

Rolling your eyes, you pulled your towel tighter around your chest. "Yeah, just got out of the shower. Thanks for the ego boost." You dropped onto the couch, giving him a pointed look. "What do you want? And how the hell do you know where I live?"

He wandered toward your kitchen instead of answering, inspecting random things like he was rating your living conditions. "Don't worry about it."

You narrowed your eyes at him. "I am absolutely going to worry about it."

"You have better things to worry about at the moment." He glanced over his shoulder, tone as casual as ever. "Public Safety's been talking about you. Some think your abilities could be dangerous." He plucked a random snack off your counter, inspecting it like it was more interesting than what he just said. "Or, you know, useful, if they get their hands on you first."

You scoffed, turning away. "Let me guess. Denji told you that?"

Yoshida's lips curled into a strange smile. "That doesn't matter."

You sighed and got up, making your way to your room to get ready. He only smiled and followed you. You didn't notice him at first, casually letting down your towel, until you turned around in shock and screamed.

"WHAT THE FUCK?! GET OUT!" You scrambled to cover yourself with your hands.

Yoshida, completely unbothered, leaned against the doorframe. "Relax, I'm not here for that. They sent me to inspect you."

Your face burned. "What, inspect my tits?! Get out!"

He sighed, finally turning his back to you. "Happy now?"

"No!"

"Too bad." He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I'm under orders, so I'm not leaving. Just get dressed already."

You pinched the bridge of your nose and winced. "Will I ever get a break...?"

You finished getting dressed and sat on the edge of your bed with a hand mirror, carefully applying your makeup.

Yoshida heard you spray perfume on and let out an amused hum. "So, where are we going?"

Your grip on the mirror tightened before you let it fall to your lap. "We?" You shot him an irritated glance. "I'm going to a friend's party. You are not invited."

He turned to face you, arms crossed. "I don't think you understand. I'm not here as your friend, I'm here to keep you under control."

You stood up, stepping toward him until you were eye to eye. "No, you don't understand." Your finger jabbed the air between you. "You killed my brother. You ruined my life. And over my dead body will I let you control what little I have left, even my freedom."

You let the words hang heavy before sitting back down, resuming your makeup as if dismissing him entirely. "You should be grateful I'm even talking to you right now."

Yoshida's expression didn't waver. "You do realize that means I could kill you too, right?"

You didn't even blink. "Then do it." You kept applying your makeup, your tone flat, unaffected.

He let out a quiet sigh and wandered over to your desk, perching himself on the edge like he had all the time in the world. "I can't risk your devil being reincarnated in someone else. Besides, I don't think Denji would like that very much."

Something sharp sparked through you, shock, anger, or maybe something worse. You weren't sure. You met his eyes and gave him a stare. "Me and Denji don't talk anymore. It's been months."

The truth was, Denji had tried to reach out to you, both in person and through countless calls. But you never picked up. What happened between the two of you shattered your trust beyond repair, and no matter how much time passed, you knew you'd never be able to forgive him.

Yoshida glanced out the window, his expression unreadable. "Huh. That's interesting." He added, "Go on."

That was it. That was your last straw.

"No." You stood up abruptly, grabbing your things and striding into the living room toward the full-length mirror. You could hear Yoshida following behind, his footsteps light and deliberate, which annoyed you even more.

He tilted his head slightly, eyes scanning your reflection. "Are you trying to summon a demon or something?" He inspected your outfit. "Or is that supposed to be a fashion statement?"

You didn't bother looking at him. "It's Halloween."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The door swung open and your friend greeted you with a drink in hand, grinning like an idiot. "Hey, bitch!"

Before you could respond, she crashed into you, wrapping her arms around you in a suffocating hug. You yelled in excitement, hugging her back.

"You look sexy as fuck," she said, pulling away just enough to get a good look at your costume.

As she straightened up, her eyes drifted past you to Yoshida, who stood just behind. She tilted her head, squinting at him. "Is... he your date?"

Your eyes widened, hands shooting up in protest. "Mika, no, he's—"

"Whatever," she waved you off, already half-distracted. "Anyone can come in. But..." She leaned against the doorframe, taking a slow, dramatic sip of her drink before pointing at Yoshida. "You're breaking the only rule."

Before he could respond, someone shoved past her, stumbling outside to vomit onto her flower pots. Mika didn't even flinch.

She turned back to Yoshida, frowning. "You gotta wear a costume."

He didn't say anything, but you heard a quiet, wet sound of something shifting behind you.

You turned just in time to see inky black tentacles unfurl from his back, twisting in the air.

Mika blinked at him.

"Good enough." She shrugged, turning on her heel and disappeared back into the party.

"Didn't know you had any friends," Yoshida said, stepping beside you. "And I definitely wouldn't have guessed you were the partying type."

You shot him an unimpressed look as you headed for the door. "Don't embarrass me."

You both stepped inside, scanning the packed house. Disco lights flashed, the music was deafening, and in the corner someone dressed as a demon was making out with someone in an angel costume like their lives depended on it. 

You pushed through the crowded kitchen, barely squeezing past groups of people as you finally got your hands on the drinks. The music pulsed around you, drowning out most conversations.

Someone bumped into you, and you turned to see Mika again, grinning. "Having fun?"

You returned the smile. "Yeah, didn't think there would be so many people..." You wandered off. "Love your costume, though."

She playfully bumped her hip against yours. "Stop!" she said dramatically, waving her hand in the air. "Well, I'll leave you to it." She raised an eyebrow, nodding her head behind you.

You turned your head around and flinched when you saw Yoshida standing right behind you. You hadn't noticed him creeping up, his presence now suddenly impossible to ignore.

"No, he's not—"

Before you could reply, someone called her name from across the room. She gasped and bolted toward them, howling like a maniac. You chuckled, watching her go before taking a sip of your drink.

You downed the first cup in seconds, the warmth spreading through your chest as you set it down, trying to steady yourself.

Yoshida leaned against the counter as he studied the people in the kitchen, jumping to the music, knocking things over like they had no sense of consequence. "Never got the appeal of drinking," he said casually. "People say it makes them feel better, but half the time, they just end up miserable."

You scoffed, staring at your empty cup. "You don't have to analyze everything, y'know. It takes the edge off. After a rough day, what else are you supposed to do?"

Yoshida hummed, tilting his head slightly. "I dunno. Maybe deal with your problems in a way that doesn't make you throw up later?"

You didn't bother replying to his comment, instead poured yourself another cup of straight gin. But, of course, after a few seconds of peace, he continued talking.

"So... this is what a frat party looks like."

You wiped your nose after chugging your second cup, eyes watering from the sharp burn. "Never knew there was free alcohol at these things. Would've started going way sooner."

Yoshida scoffed. "Yeah, as if you've ever gotten invited before."

You chose to ignore his cocky remark, instead leaning forward onto the counter, resting your head in your hands as the alcohol settled in.

Yoshida turned his back to the counter, leaning against it. "Those guys are staring at your ass, you know."

You stood back up with a groan, shooting him a glare. "Do you ever shut up?"

To your annoyance, he only grinned, looking entirely too pleased with himself. "Okay, okay. I'll go check up on Denji, then."

His voice cut through the noise. He was already walking away, watching your face as if waiting for a reaction.

You froze, drink halfway to your lips.

Denji was there?

You watched him disappear in the crowd as you stood there, shocked.

You squeezed the empty cup, tossing it against the wall, the sound of it crashing muffled by the music. A few stray drops of alcohol still dripped from your mouth as you wiped your lips and started walking towards the living room.

You pulled out your phone to check the time, only to find that the battery had died. With a frustrated sigh, you shoved it into your pocket, making a mental note to keep track of it, though you knew that was a bad idea, especially since you were drunk.

As soon as you stepped in, you immediately felt a hand grab yours, tugging you toward the center of the room where bodies were packed together, dancing, pushing, and swaying to the blaring music.

Mika really was a party animal.

For a moment, you hesitated, but pulled yourself together, deciding to step out of your comfort zone. Maybe it'd help take your mind off the chaos swirling in your chest.

You grabbed her hand as she pulled you into the rhythm of the crowd, the beat vibrating through your chest. Without thinking too much, you started moving with her, letting go of everything for a few moments.

You danced for a bit, ignoring the way people were literally grinding on each other all around you when you suddenly felt a cold hand touch your shoulder for the hundredth time.

To no one's surprise, you turned to find Yoshida, again, standing right behind you. You couldn't help but wonder how he'd even found you in the sea of people.

You didn't have the nerve to be mad or annoyed anymore, the tipsiness slowly wearing it off.

"Yoshida! Come on!"

You grabbed his hands and pulled him closer into the crowd. He raised an eyebrow, looking a bit out of place as you started to dance in front of him.

He didn't pull away, though. Instead, he stayed close, watching you with an unreadable expression as the music carried on around you both.

You moved a little closer, unable to suppress a laugh at how serious he looked, standing so stiff among the chaos of the party.

"I know you're enjoying this," you mocked him, pressing your finger lightly against his nose.

Before you could even pull your hand away, he grabbed your wrist, squeezing it firmly with an irritated expression.

You grinned, but quickly dodged the tension by shifting your hand to his shoulder, letting your body press against his in the middle of the crowd.

You leaned in, your mouth close to his ear, your breath warm against his skin. "I fucking hate you. You know that?" Your smile faltered, replaced by a serious, almost bitter tone.

You leaned back, studying Yoshida's expression, which remained unchanged, as if your words didn't faze him at all.

You opened your mouth, preparing to say something more, but out of the corner of your eye, a familiar figure caught your attention.

Your pulse quickened as you recognized him.

He was standing at the edge of the crowd, his body frozen and eyes fixed on you and Yoshida. The moment your eyes met, his expression shifted, and you couldn't help but notice the way his jaw tightened, the subtle frown forming on his face.

He was dressed as something between a zombie and a vampire, or maybe neither. His shirt was so shredded he was practically shirtless, and his body was covered in smeared fake blood... or at least, you assumed it was fake. With Denji, you could never be sure.

For a brief second, it felt like time stopped. His stare burned into you, heavy with unspoken words, before he quickly turned and walked away.

You felt an ache in your chest as you debated over going after him or leaving him be. You had to move on eventually, you thought.

Your eyes burned as tears threatened to well up, the weight of your thoughts pressing down on you as you stared at the spot where Denji stood a few seconds before.

"What's wrong with you, now?" Yoshida's voice cut through the noise, his eyes fixed on your distant, unfocused stare.

You didn't answer him, only pushed him away slightly and started walking out of the room. You decided it'd be a good idea to just sit on the bathroom floor a bit, away from everyone.

You stepped into the hallway and grabbed a random drink off the nearest table, not bothering to check whose it was or what was in it. Tilting your head back, you downed it in one go, letting the burn settle in your throat.

Just as you were about to head upstairs, your feet suddenly came to a stop.

There, just ahead, stood Denji and a girl, Asa. You didn't want to believe it.

She wrapped her arm around Denji's neck, leaning in like they were the only two people in the room. Your face burned, a sharp sting of irritation crawling up your spine.

"Can't even go to the bathroom without missing something," you muttered to yourself, gripping an empty cup a little too tightly.

You stood there in shock as you watched them from a distance, not wanting to look yet not able to take your eyes off.

"What's going on here?" A familiar voice rang out from behind you.

You clenched your fists, a wave of anger building as heat rushed to your head. You've had enough.

"Leave me the fuck alone!" you screamed, not caring who heard. "Am I gonna have to put up with you forever?!" You spun around, shoving past him, your shoulder bumping roughly into his as you stormed toward the door.

He put his hands in his pockets and turned his head to you. "Probably—" You barely caught the rest of the sentence as you shut the door behind you, muffling the noise of the party.

You sniffled from the cold and ran a hand through your hair, sitting down on the steps, the cool night cutting your skin. Reaching into your pocket, you pulled out a cigarette, lighting it with slightly unsteady fingers. The flame flickered before settling, the first inhale burning your lungs just enough to ground you.

For a while, you'd had peace. After everything that happened with Denji, you thought you were finally moving on. You met new people, started settling into something that almost felt like a normal life.

And yet, here you were, right back where you started. You brought your knees up to your chest and rested your head on top of them.

"Can I join?"

You heard an unfamiliar voice come from behind and raised your head, expecting Yoshida, but to your surprise, your eyes landed on someone else. For a split second, relief washed over you.

You pulled out your cigarette pack and offered it toward him, assuming he just wanted a smoke, nothing more.

He chuckled, shaking his head. "I've got my own." He sat down next to you on the steps. "I just wanted to talk to you."

You glanced at him, surprised. "Feel free," you said with a small smile, looking him in the eyes.

Your eyes drifted over his face before trailing down to his exposed torso. "Aren't you freezing like that?" you asked, shivering just from looking at him.

He waved a hand dismissively. "Nah, a body like this doesn't get cold." He joked, flexing his arm as you rolled your eyes dramatically.

He held your gaze for a moment, then quickly looked away, shaking his head. "Oh, shit, sorry. I'm Koji." He paused, thinking for a second. "I swear, I've seen you somewhere before."

You raised an eyebrow. "I'm gonna assume we go to the same high school." You glanced back at the house behind you. "I mean, no shit. Almost everyone here is from Fourth East. I can't escape them."

He chuckled at your comment as he took a cigarette out of his pocket. "Yeah... I can't stand most people here." He nudged his knee against yours. "Except you..." He smiled, raising an eyebrow playfully.

You bumped his knee back. "Oh, stop. You've known me for like, five seconds."

"Five seconds is all it takes." he replied smoothly, his grin widening.

You parted your lips slightly, trying to hide the blush creeping up your neck, almost choking on your spit.

"What are you supposed to be?" he asked, eyes inspecting your outfit.

You glanced down at your costume and then back at him. "A witch? I think it's pretty obvious." You tilted your head slightly. "You?"

"Greek God." He chuckled, clearly amused by your reaction.

You couldn't help but look down at his costume, trying not to stare at his bare chest for too long. "Ah... I see it now."

He hummed in response as he held the cigarette between his lips, lighting it.

He scooted closer, his knee brushing against yours. Slowly, his eyes drifted down, fixated on your chest as if you weren't right there. "What do you say we... head upstairs for a bit? It's pretty cold out here."

You didn't want to admit it to yourself, but he was undeniably charming. The last time you had any kind of attention was when you were still talking to Denji, and honestly, you were starting to feel a little desperate.

Deep down, you knew you'd make some questionable choices when you were drunk, but you pushed those thoughts aside.

You smiled back at him. "Fuck it, why not?" Slinging your bag over your shoulder and flicking your cigarette to the ground.

He stood up and extended his hand to you. You hesitated for a moment before taking it, standing up and holding his hand for a brief second longer than you intended.

You stepped into the house and the pounding music hit you like a wave. The air was thick with sweat, alcohol, and the scent of weed. Koji's hand found yours, his grip firm as he guided you through the sea of bodies crammed into the narrow hallway. You pushed past the crowd, until finally reaching the stairs.

He moved ahead of you, and despite yourself, your eyes traced the lines of his half-exposed body, a fleeting moment of admiration slipping through your intoxicated haze.

It didn't take long before the moment shattered, something you deep down felt was coming.

A drunk girl was making her way down the stairs when she caught sight of Koji. Her eyes lit up with a desperate kind of recognition, and without hesitation, she lunged for him, arms outstretched.

Without hesitation, Koji pushed the girl away immediately with brutal force. It was so fast that your brain struggled to catch up. That, you didn't expect.

Her body hit the railing with a sickening crack before she tumbled down the stairs. Gasps echoed through the crowd as a few people rushed to help her, but Koji didn't even spare her a glance. His grip on your hand tightened, and without a word, he quickened his pace, dragging you up the stairs.

Your heart slammed against your ribs. You knew something was wrong.

You tried to pull away, panic spiking through the alcohol fog in your head, but his hold only tightened. Your pulse pounded in your ears as you struggled harder, twisting your wrist, nails digging into his skin.

Nothing.

Your breath hitched as he yanked you forward, his steps steady, unwavering. The bedroom door loomed ahead, and dread pooled in your stomach.

"Koji—" You yelled out, desperately.

The door swung open and before you could react, he shoved you inside. You hit the floor hard, a jolt of pain rattling through you.

He hurried to shut the door, pressing his back against it as he locked it with a click before tossing the key aside.

Your breathing was heavy, your head bowed as if refusing to accept what was happening.

Slow, deliberate footsteps approached. A rough hand gripped your cheeks, squeezing hard, forcing you to look at him.

He crouched to your level, eyes cold and unreadable. "This isn't fucking funny anymore. Let me go." You tried to stand, but his fingers wrapped around your throat instead.

You gasped as your feet lifted off the ground, his grip tightening. Air refused to reach your lungs. His stare remained indifferent, as if watching something insignificant struggle.

"I can't believe you actually fell for that."

A metallic sound rang in your ears. Your eyes widened as you saw the glint of blades protruding from his knuckles.

You choked, trying to speak, but could only do so much.

He flashed you a terrifying grin. "My name is Sugo Miri. Former member of Tokyo Special Division 5." His eyes roamed on your body again as you tried to fight him off, but your body was sluggish, too weakened by the alcohol, too lightheaded from the lack of air.

For a moment, it felt like your soul had left your body. Before you could reach unconsciousness, you heard a loud knock at the door.

"Is someone in there?"

Chapter Text

You heard a voice outside the room and the last bit of air in your lungs got caught in your throat as Miri's grip tightened around your neck. You gasped, choking, your body convulsing in desperate attempts to pull in air.

You prayed someone would come in and interfere, but it was no use, since he locked it.

For a moment, silence filled the room, your heart plummering. A single tear slipped down your cheek as your vision blurred, feeling your consciousness slip away.

The doorknob suddenly began to rattle, making you both turn your heads.

"Hey! Whoever's having sex in my parents' room, you better come out right now!" a voice shouted from the other side.

Miri glanced back, momentarily distracted. His grip loosened just enough for you to drag in a sharp, ragged breath.

The absurdity of the situation cut through the fog in your head like a blade. That half-second of hesitation was all you needed.

His grip slackened, and you lurched forward, coughing and gasping as air tore into your lungs like broken glass. You didn't think. You just moved.

Your body went into full survival mode.

You slammed your forehead into his nose, making him grunt in pain. Twisting sideways, you rolled off the bed and hit the floor with a painful thud. Agony shot up your arm, but you crawled, you had to.

"Get off the goddamn door!" the voice outside yelled. "I'm not joking! I'll throw you out!"

Miri held his bleeding nose as he stood up and tried reaching for the door, but he was too late. Momentum had turned against him.

You made an effort to reach the handle and unlock the door, making it burst open with a loud crack, slamming into Miri's shoulder. He staggered back, momentarily off balance.

You scrambled to your feet, the hallway spinning wildly, but you ran, blindly, instinctively, right past the person in the doorway.

"Wait– what the hell?!" they shouted after you, confused.

You heard a crash, glass, maybe a lamp, but you didn't dare look back.

You nearly collapsed at the stairs, your vision swimming, but then someone caught you, steadying you. 

You looked up, eyes wide and vulnerable. "Mika..." Your voice cracked. "Oh, thank God."

You collapsed into her arms, coughing as you tried to catch your breath.

She held you tightly, her body tense with shock. "Hey, hey, breathe. You're okay. Just breathe."

Gently, she stroked your hair and began guiding you toward the front door, parting the crowd with quiet urgency. People stared, but she didn't stop. Neither did you.

The moment you stepped outside, the air hit you, cold, clean and real. You gasped like you hadn't taken a full breath in hours.

You followed her to the back of the yard and dropped onto the porch steps, legs giving out beneath you, hands planted behind you to keep from falling completely.

Then you did anyway, letting your body sink down, lying flat against the grass, eyes half-lidded, staring up into the open sky.

Mika crouched beside you, her brows knitted in confusion. "Are you drunk? What the hell happened in there?"

You didn't answer at first. You just stared up at the stars, blinking slowly. "I'm not drunk," you murmured.

Mika sighed. "You can't go home like this. Not alone."

You pulled a bent cigarette from your pocket and lit it, the tip glowing faintly in the dark. After a quiet drag, you exhaled slowly, watching the smoke disappear into the night.

Your eyes welled with tears, but your face didn't change. You just stared ahead, quiet and exhausted. You weren't sad anymore. You were done.

"Do you believe in fate, Mika?" you asked, like you were just thinking out loud.

Mika blinked beside you, caught off guard.

"I don't know. I guess?" she said, tucking her hair behind her ear as she shifted closer. She shifted her head gently against your shoulder, the two of you lying side by side on the porch.

"Where'd that come from?" she asked, her voice soft.

You stayed quiet, still staring up at the sky, quietly annoyed that it wasn't clear. The clouds hung there, dull and heavy, like even the universe couldn't be bothered to give you something beautiful tonight.

"I was just thinking..." you began, voice low. "Maybe fate isn't about everything being planned out. Maybe it's just the name we give to the moments that feel too cruel to be random, and the ones that feel too perfect to be deserved."

Mika didn't respond right away.

You continued, the thoughts forming slowly as they rose from some hidden place in you.

"Like... maybe fate's not a straight line. Maybe it's more like a web. Every decision, every little moment, it all branches out, and maybe some things are just bound to happen no matter which path we take. Not because they were written... but because we were always going to be the kind of people who walked toward them."

Mika hummed in agreement. "Well said. I think people are just scared to admit that their actions actually matter. So they make up things, fate, destiny, or whatever, just to feel less responsible."

You sat up a little, eyes lighting up. "Exactly! People are terrified of the unknown. They'd rather believe there's some grand plan than accept that the world is just unpredictable."

You clasped your hands together, the thought still buzzing in your chest. "It's like... if nothing's certain, then everything we do really counts. And that's scarier than any monster."

Mika raised an eyebrow. "You sound like you've been living in a philosophy subreddit."

You choked on your own spit mid-laugh and bumped her shoulder playfully. "You would think that way too if you went through some deep shit." 

Mika wasn't sure if she should be worried or impressed.

You turned your head slightly, eyes flickering toward her. You already knew what she was going to ask next.

"Look, you've had a rough night. Is there anyone here you trust? Anyone I can call to take you home?"

You hesitated, dread curling in your chest. You were going to regret this.

"Yeah... Yoshida," you said disappointingly. "I came with him."

Mika didn't question it. "Alright. Stay here. I'll go find him."

You closed your eyes again, the night air washing over you. Your mood dropped the moment she walked away, leaving you alone on the porch. "I should've just stayed home." you whispered to yourself, almost bitterly.

"I agree. Dangerous people are out there, y'know."

The voice came from behind, casual, almost amused.

Before you could even process it, pain exploded across your scalp.

A hand yanked your hair back hard, jerking your head and dragging you. Your breath hitched in your throat as your body was pulled across the grass, your back scraping against the uneven ground. You let out a strangled grunt of pain, limbs flailing, trying to catch onto something, anything.

Your vision blurred as panic surged through you.

"Mika—!" you choked out, reaching for her, but you couldn't see her anymore. The music washed over your useless cries.

The world tilted, stars spinning above you, distant and indifferent.

Your body had given out, trembling beneath the weight of exhaustion and fear.

"Please," you whispered, voice raw. "Please let me go... What do you want from me?"

"You know what I want," he snapped, suddenly stopping in his tracks. He yanked you back hard, forcing you to wince and grab your head. "You know something about the Special Division. I'm here to get the truth."

Your breath hitched as panic set in. "What? I don't know anything! Let me go!"

His eyes narrowed. "Yoru told me otherwise."

"Who the fuck is Yoru?!" you shouted, your voice cracking with fear and confusion. "I don't know anyone with that name. I fucking swear!" You yelled out.

Your cries hung in the air, unanswered, until something warm splattered against your cheek and pulled you out of your thoughts.

Slowly you opened your eyes. Miri was still standing over you, but the look on his face had changed. His expression wasn't angry or cruel anymore, it was frozen in something far more terrifying, pure, uncomprehending fear. You felt something drip on your face, your breath hitching. 

Your eyes fell to his stomach as you saw the hole in his chest, it was as if time was moving in slow motion.

A brutal, gaping wound tore through him, and from it the jagged teeth of a chainsaw were humming faintly beneath the sound of the techno music in the background.

You barely had time to react before his body collapsed, falling forward, dead weight crushing down on top of you. The chainsaw tore free from his back with a wet, mechanical groan, and blood soaked through your clothes as you let out a choking gasp.

You winced, shoving Miri's body off of you with trembling arms. He hit the ground with a heavy, lifeless thud. The blood smeared across your skin made you shiver, but your legs moved on instinct, you pushed yourself upright, swaying as you fought to catch your breath.

For a moment, everything was silent.

You just stood there, staring at him. At the gaping wound in his chest. At the pool of blood spreading out like a shadow. Your heartbeat thundered in your ears. The world around you felt unreal, like the aftermath of a nightmare you hadn't yet woken from.

You heard the sound of a horror scream from someone else, but before you could process it, a cold, wet hand grabbed yours and started running.

"Oh my god." You whispered to yourself. "Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod." 

You stopped in your tracks, chest heaving, and locked eyes with him. 

"Denji, what the fuck?" you snapped, breathless. "What part of 'I want nothing to do with you' do you not understand?!"

Your voice cracked as it rose, sharp with anger. But he just stood there. Silent.

Staring at you with wide, hollow eyes, blood dripping slowly down his forehead. His mouth was slightly open, pulling in ragged breaths like he didn't even know he was still alive. 

He stared at you like there was no tomorrow. You felt his eyes pierce through you, but you looked away at the direction of the house, hearing the screams from the people.

"Shit, shit, shit!" You kicked the base of a tree hard enough to sting your foot. "Look what you got me into!"

"What I got you into?" Denji snapped, eyebrows furrowed as he stepped closer. You didn't budge, just stood there, arms crossed like a wall he couldn't get through.

"I saved your ass. Are you seriously blaming me right now?"

You pointed a finger at him, eyes burning. "You wouldn't have had to save me if you'd just stayed by my side like you said you would!"

Denji scoffed. "Me? You're acting like I pushed you away. Like I was the one who said, 'I want nothing to do with you.'" 

You laughed bitterly and dropped down against the tree trunk, resting your head back against the bark. In the distance, the screams from the party still echoed. You tried to ignore them, tried to ignore everything.

"Yeah, well... maybe if you didn't ditch me for Asa."

Denji froze. A tense silence hung between you before he let out a slow, irritated breath and ran a hand down his face.

"...What?" he muttered, like he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Me and Asa never went out."

You stared at him. "Oh really? What about that one time at the movies, then?"

He threw up his arms. "That wasn't a fucking date! That was work related."

"Oh yeah? Because Asa just happens to be a devil?"

Denji's voice dropped, dangerously quiet. "I don't have to explain myself to you."

"Good!" you shot back, pushing yourself to your feet, nose inches from his. "Cause I don't want to hear it!"

A blaring scream of an ambulance tore through the air. Both of you turned toward the noise instinctively, but didn't move. You stood there, eyes locked, the flashing red light briefly washing over his face before fading. 

"Let's go." Denji looked away, voice tight, and grabbed your hand like he needed to get the hell out of there.

But you didn't move.

You stayed rooted to the ground, gaze fixed ahead. "Did you already forget?" you muttered, not even looking at him. "I can make us invisible."

He paused. His fingers tensed slightly around yours before his eyes drifted down to where your hands met.

You took the lead, your grip reversing his, you were guiding now.

As you walked, the sounds around you intensified: the rising screams, the desperate cries, like the whole world was cracking open just a few blocks away. Denji's pace faltered beside you.

"Bitch got what he had coming." you said flatly, eyes locked forward, unreadable.

You reached the house just as they were loading Miri's lifeless body into the back of a van. Girls, some drunk, some soaked in tears, screamed like wild animals, clawing at the doors, collapsing onto the pavement in hysterics.

You and Denji stood there, motionless. Silent. The flashing red lights painted your faces in pulses. Neither of you cried. Neither of you flinched.

Eventually, you turned your heads and looked at each other. Unblinking. Like two people who had seen something far worse than death. 

Without thinking, your hand reached up, thumb gently brushing a streak of blood from Denji's forehead, right before it could slip into his eye.

"Where to now?" Denji asked, his voice low, eyes still scanning the chaos behind you both.

"Well—" You started, but cut yourself off as your stomach dropped.

You'd almost forgotten, you hadn't come here alone.

Your gaze drifted over the crowd of frantic bodies, the absence of music and cigarette smoke blurring into a haze, until it landed on a familiar face near the doorstep. You raised a hand instinctively to wave, then stopped midway.

He couldn't see you. Not while you were invisible.

You let your hand drop. "I came with Yoshida." You sighed. "Fucking hate him. The Special Division sent him to babysit me or something. Like I need a goddamn bodyguard."

Denji gave a quiet hum, almost too casual. "Yeah? That all there is to it?"

You glanced at him, eyebrow raised. He was referencing you dancing on Yoshida earlier. "Yeah? Why, you jealous?" You gave a teasing smile and poked him lightly in the chest.

He didn't smile back. "Nah. Just like how you're not jealous that I came with Asa."

You turned your head sharply to look at him, your smile slowly fading but he was already staring at you. Eyes unreadable. That same blank expression he wore right before pulling away from people.

You opened your mouth, some witty remark already forming, but nothing came out. You only felt his fingers slipping from yours as he watched you intensely. 

Before you knew it he was gone, turning on his heel and vanishing into the sea of flashing lights and silhouettes without another word.

You stood there frozen, blinking as if your mind hadn't caught up with your body. Your throat tightened, and you hated the feeling blooming in your chest, like your heart had just dropped down an elevator shaft.

You wouldn't admit it. Not out loud. Not even in your head.

But you'd waited.

You'd waited for this, for him, since the last time everything went to shit.

You pulled out your flip phone, fingers trembling just slightly as you typed out a message.

'Meet me at home. See you in a few. (hopefully not)'

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You arrived at your front door and instinctively reached for your keys, only to pause mid-motion, hand hovering above the lock. 

"Shit," you muttered, patting your pockets anyway, as if the keys might magically appear. "I gave them to Yoshida..."

You let out an exaggerated sigh and slammed your fist against the door, leaning your weight into it like it might just open out of sympathy. It didn't.

You pulled out your phone, the screen lighting up your frustrated expression in the dim corridor. 

But before you could find Yoshida's contact, you heard the faintest click behind you, the subtle creak of the lock turning. In an instant, the ground was gone.

You choked on your spit as the door gave way beneath you, tumbling backward into the dark hallway and hitting the floor with a loud thud. Pain shot up your spine, sharp and unforgiving. 

Yoshida stepped into view from beside the doorframe, completely unfazed. His expression the same old emotionless one as he looked down at you.

You groaned, rolling onto your side with a wince and slowly pushing yourself up.

"Are you serious?" you rasped. "I could've used some help, you know. You didn't have to move out the way." 

Yoshida just tilted his head slightly. 

"You looked like you had it under control."

You rolled your eyes and stepped inside, letting the door fall shut behind you. The silence of the apartment felt heavier than usual. Without a word, you sank onto the couch and dropped your face into your hands, exhaling slowly through your fingers.

Yoshida lingered near the doorway for a moment before finally speaking, his voice casual.

"So," he said, "did you hear what went down back there?"

You turned your head just enough to glance at him over your shoulder, your expression dry.

"Yeah. I heard," you muttered. "That was the guy who nearly raped me."

"Huh," Yoshida replied, almost thoughtfully. "Tough break. So... you killed him, right?"

You didn't answer right away. Your eyes drifted to the floor as you leaned back into the couch, your body suddenly feeling heavier than it had all day.

"No," you said quietly. "I didn't."

"Did Denji kill him?" Yoshida stood in silence behind you.

Your head snapped up, eyes wide. "No."

He scoffed before walking away. 

"You're a terrible liar."

Chapter Text

"Wake up!"

Someone shook your shoulders, gently at first, then with more urgency.

You woke up with a groan, eyes fluttering open against the morning light coming through the window. Your vision was hazy, the room swimming in a sleepy blur, but there was someone standing at the edge of your bed.

"I wanna go to the park," the voice said, full of impatience. "Pleaaase?"

You blinked, and your breath caught in your throat.

A small figure. Bare feet. Messy hair. A hoodie far too big for his frame.

Your heart stuttered as you pushed yourself up from the sheets, your eyes wide, scanning every inch of him in disbelief.

"...Yuto?"

He stomped his foot on the floor in protest, arms crossed as he pouted. "Come on! It's been forever since you took me. You promised you would last time."

Your lips parted, but no sound came out. You were frozen, completely, painfully still, as the weight of the moment crashed down on you. Your chest rose and fell with shaky breaths as you stared at him, eyes wet, brain still trying to catch up with what you were seeing.

He looked so real.

But he wasn't.

You jolted awake, coughing as you choked on your own spit, just a dream. Nothing more.

"Someone doesn't seem well." a voice called lazily from the living room.

You groaned, dragging yourself upright.

 "Maybe I'd be doing better if you hadn't killed my brother in front of me." You replied harshly.

The silence that followed was expected. No apologies, Yoshida didn't do those.

After breakfast the two of you sat on opposite ends of the couch, the morning news yelling with praise for Chainsaw Man's latest save. You grabbed the remote and turned it off mid-sentence, the room falling quiet as you rested your head in your hands.

"How'd last night go?"

 Yoshida's voice cut through the stillness, casual, eyes still on the blank TV screen.

You lifted your head, face heavy with disbelief.

 "Why do you care?" you snapped.

He tilted his head, not looking at you, but that faint smirk was creeping in.

 "I don't, really. But I figured if I asked, you'd stop looking like you're two seconds from stabbing the wall."

You narrowed your eyes. "You're insufferable."

"I get that a lot," he said, finally glancing at you. 

"Well, since you wanna be my therapist so bad," you muttered, dragging a hand down your face. "He's still with that backstabbing bitch Asa. Can you believe that? After everything she pulled? I swear she only got with him to spite me. Or out of jealousy."

You groaned and slammed your fist into the couch cushion, frustration boiling over.

Yoshida stretched out, lounging like he had nowhere better to be. "First off, I never signed up to be your therapist. Don't pin that on me."

He tilted his head toward you, voice cool but amused. "Second... why is it always jealousy? Like, every time. You ever stop and think maybe he just doesn't like you?"

You shot him a glare. "Wow. Thanks."

You masked it with sarcasm, but it did nothing to dull the sting. His words landed sharper than you expected, like tiny knives hidden in a joke. You sat back, crossing your arms in a weak attempt to shield yourself, hoping he didn't notice the way your jaw clenched or how your gaze faltered for just a second too long.

Typical Yoshida, cutting right where it hurt and pretending it was casual conversation.

"I'm just saying," he shrugged. "Maybe do a little self-reflection before you start building your drama arc. Just once."

You huffed, crossing your arms. "You're an asshole."

"And you have terrible taste in people," he said without missing a beat. "Yet here we are. Perfect match, really."

You froze, his words echoing in your head like they meant something more than they should have.

Perfect match?

You stared at him, trying to read between the lines, but Yoshida wasn't one to let anything slip unless he meant to. Still, the heat crept up your neck anyway.

He glanced over, just briefly. Long enough to catch the way your expression shifted.

And of course, you panicked.

"Anyway," you blurted out, sitting up straighter, "aren't you supposed to be in Public Safety or something? Shouldn't you be out there, I don't know, slaying devils instead of sitting here talking shit with me all the time?"

Yoshida slightly grinned, arms still stretched behind his head.

"This is my job," he said, "I picked it out myself. Makima knew me as one of the best bodyguards out there."

"Makima? Who the hell is that...?" You blinked. "And, you picked... what? Babysitting me?"

"Exactly," he said, looking too pleased with himself, ignoring your first question entirely. "High-risk target. Mentally unstable. Terrible taste in men. Someone's gotta keep an eye on you."

You gawked at him. "That's not funny."

He leaned toward you just a little, enough for you to feel it. That familiar weight of attention that made it hard to think clearly.

"Didn't say it was." A pause followed. "But you didn't deny any of it."

Your mouth opened, and then closed.

Touché.

You squinted at him, "What is wrong with you? Are you on drugs?" you asked, "Is this a test? Are you a shapeshifter?" You couldn't pinpoint why he was so flirty all of a sudden. 

Yoshida just laughed, not even trying to hide it.

"I'm gonna take a shower," he said casually, grabbing your bathrobe from the hanger without asking.

You blinked. "Hey!"

The bathroom door shut with a soft click, led by the sound of the lock turning.

You stared for a second, dumbfounded.

"...I'm throwing that thing out."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"Ugh..." Your alarm blasted through the room, piercing your ears and dragging you out of sleep with all the grace of a car crash. You groaned, slapping at your alarm clock until the noise finally stopped.

Everything about this Monday felt unbearable, the stiffness in your limbs, the dull ache behind your eyes, and the heavy weight of reality settling back in after a painfully long weekend. Still half-asleep, you stumbled through your morning routine and eventually made your way to school.

Once in class, you slouched into your seat, exhaling sharply as you dropped your bag to the floor. 

Two months into the school year, and the days had started to blur together, except for that one night at the party. That had been the first and only time you saw Denji. He hadn't shown up a single day since school started. 

Which made it all the more surreal when he casually walked into the classroom and sat down right behind you.

Your entire body tensed. What the hell is he doing here? 

Your heart raced in your chest, your mind scrambling to piece together any logical explanation. 

But before you could process it, the teacher walked in, his voice slicing through the tension like a knife. You blinked, trying to pull yourself together, but your thoughts remained tangled, stuck on the boy sitting just a few feet behind you.

You pretended not to notice and kept your eyes fixed on the teacher, your hand moving only when taking notes.

Half an hour passed. You kept your posture straight, unmoving, but your mind drifted elsewhere, until something poked you in the back. Your heart fluttered against your will.

You didn't want to hope, but you did.

You turned around and there he was.

Denji. Flashing that stupid, boyish grin like no time had passed at all.

"What are you doing after school?" he asked, casual as ever.

You paused, weighing your options. "Dunno."

Then turned back around. If he really wanted you, he'd have to prove it. You weren't going to fall for him that easily, not anymore.

You heard him sigh and scribble something on his notebook. The silence between you stretched, a little too tight. You almost felt guilty for brushing him off.

"I knew you liked Yoshida. And now you're even living together, huh?"

You tightened your grip on your pen. Still, you refused to answer. You didn't owe him an explanation.

"I guess the rumor about him having a big dick is true."

That was the final blow, his voice low and amused. 

Your blood boiled. Your face went red hot. You were shaking from how hard you were gripping your pen. You couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Shut the fuck up!" you snapped, slamming your hand down on his desk.

The room went dead silent.

All eyes turned to you.

The teacher's voice cut through the tension, sharp and unimpressed. "Excuse me?"

You stood there, jaw clenched, trying to breathe through the rage.

"May I please go to the bathroom?"

You slapped your face with wet hands, trying to jolt yourself back to reality. The cold stung your skin, but not enough. 

Not enough to pull you out of your spiraling thoughts. You left the water running, hoping the steady hiss might drown out everything else in your head, the noise, the confusion, the ache in your chest that never seemed to let up.

You gripped the edges of the sink and leaned forward, watching the water swirl down the drain. Your reflection in the mirror looked unfamiliar. Tired eyes, flushed skin, a mind held together by threads.

You exhaled shakily.

What the hell is going on with me?

You needed time. Space. A moment to process everything that had happened in the past few days, except time wasn't something you were being given. 

Everything was moving too fast, too chaotically, like you were being shoved through a tunnel without the chance to look around and understand where the hell you were.

You turned your back to the sink and let yourself slide down the cold tile wall, sitting on the floor with your knees pulled to your chest.

Your voice came out in a whisper, barely audible above the faucet still running.

"Am I being too dramatic? Am I going crazy?"

"Just a little bit."

The sudden voice made your heart leap into your throat.

You looked up sharply to find Yoshida leaning against the doorway, arms crossed, his expression unreadable.

"You asshole!" you snapped, standing up too fast and almost slipping. "Can you stop sneaking up on me like that?! Can't I have a single moment to myself?"

He didn't flinch, didn't even blink. He just tilted his head slightly, eyes locked on yours.

You were panting, half from the shock, half from the pent-up frustration finally boiling over. You didn't even know who you were more angry at, him, Denji, or yourself.

"Do you even realize how exhausting you are?" you said, your voice rising. "You just hover, like you're waiting for me to break or something. Watching me. Judging me. Like you know what's best for me, but you don't say it. You just linger!"

He stood in the doorway, one shoulder propped lazily against the frame, hands in his pockets, his face unreadable as always. You hadn't heard him come in. Hadn't sensed him. 

He blended into the background like shadow, like silence. And now, here he was again, appearing exactly when you were at your weakest.

"It's a public school bathroom, relax." he said simply. "You're not that interesting."

The words stunned you for a second. You stared at him, stunned, not because they were cruel, but because they were casual. Like he was commenting on the weather.

You scoffed, wiping the water from your face with trembling fingers. "Of course. Of course you don't care. Why would you? You just hover like a fucking parasite, watching everything fall apart, but never doing anything. Never saying anything unless it's some backhanded comment."

He didn't answer right away. He took a step into the room, shoes clicking faintly against the tile, then leaned against the wall near the door, eyes half-lidded.

"I don't hover," he said dryly. "I'm assigned to watch you."

You blinked at him. "So that's all this is? Surveillance?"

"That's all it ever was."

The silence that followed was deafening.

You swallowed hard, trying to suppress the sudden wave of emotion crawling up your throat. Your voice came out quieter. "You could've at least pretended to give a shit."

"Why?" he asked. His tone was calm, even. That made it worse. "Would that have helped?"

You stared at him, your eyes burning. "Maybe."

He looked at you for a moment. Really looked. Then shook his head slowly.

"I don't do 'maybe.' And I don't do pretend."

You turned away, pressing your palms to the edge of the sink just to keep steady.

"I'm trying to hold it together," you muttered, voice shaking. "I'm trying not to fall apart, and everyone around me just keeps... pulling, pushing, saying they care and then disappearing when it matters."

He didn't say anything.

"And you..." Your voice cracked, pointing your finger at him. "You're the worst of them. Because you're always there, but you're not. You just stand there and watch like you're behind glass. Like none of it touches you."

He sighed. Not out of regret, but out of mild annoyance.

"I'm not your friend," he said. "I was never meant to be."

You turned to face him again, chest tight, your hands clenched into fists at your sides. "Then why show up like this? Why talk to me at all?"

Another shrug. "You asked if you were crazy. I answered."

Your lips parted, but no words came. It was like he'd pulled the floor out from under you without even raising his voice.

"I'm assigned to you," he said coolly. "That's all. Will you ever understand?"

"That's bullshit."

He walked further into the bathroom, slow and steady. The distance between you shrank until you could feel his presence, quiet, suffocating, inescapable. 

He squatted before you.

"You want me to care?" he asked softly.

You hesitated. "...I don't know."

He stared at you for a long time, eyes flicking over your face like he was searching for something. Like he was trying to decide.

"You keep saying you're going crazy," he said. "Maybe I am too."

Your breath caught. "What are you—"

Before you could finish, he stepped forward and grabbed your jaw, kissing you.

No warning. No hesitation.

It was rough, neither sweet nor gentle. It felt like frustration, like surrender, like a dam breaking after holding back too long. His hand came up to your jaw, fingers sliding into your hair, tilting your face so he could kiss you deeper, wasting no time to shove his tongue in your mouth.

He tasted like fresh mint. Like secrets. Like someone who wasn't supposed to want this, but did.

Your hands found his chest, not to push him away, but to hold on. Because nothing else felt solid anymore. Because everything was spinning except him.

The kiss was desperate, until he finally pulled back, just enough to look at you. His lips were parted, eyes darker than before, but his face still unreadable.

You stared at him, stunned. Heart racing. Barely breathing.

He didn't say a word.

He just stepped back.

"I shouldn't have done that," he muttered under his breath.

"That didn't happen." 

Then, as quietly as he'd come in, he turned and walked out of the bathroom, leaving you behind with nothing but your thoughts, the sound of the water still running, and the burn of his kiss still on your lips.

You stared into the doorway and into the empty hallway, lips parted and eyes wide, as if still trying to process it.

You stayed there for a while, maybe five minutes, maybe more, leaning against the sink, your eyes fixed on the tiled floor. Your lips were still parted, as if your brain hadn't caught up with your body yet. It felt like you were moving through fog.

He kissed you.

And then he left like it didn't mean anything.

You didn't know what to feel, only that you had to move. You pushed yourself upright slowly, limbs heavy, and stepped out of the bathroom.

The hallway was quiet. Only a soft hum in the air. You walked aimlessly at first, until your body remembered where your classroom was supposed to be.

But before you got there, you bumped shoulders with someone at the corner. Hard enough to jolt you back a bit.

It was Asa.

She turned her head sharply, dark eyes locking onto yours, but she didn't say anything right away. No snark. No cold judgment. Just... silence.

You tried to keep walking. You had no room in your head for her.

But, of course, she didn't stay quiet.

"Hey," she called out your name. Her voice was steadier than you expected. "Wait, can we just talk?"

You paused for a fraction of a second. Debated it. But ultimately, you kept walking.

You mumbled, "Just leave me alone..."

Her footsteps followed. You heard them echo down the hall behind you, determined but hesitant.

"Please," she exhaled. "I'm not your enemy."

You rolled your eyes, not slowing down. "I have better things to think about right now."

"I know," she said quickly. "But just... listen. For once, can you just listen?"

You didn't answer.

"I'm serious. Let me explain. I'm not trying to fight you."

Her voice cracked just slightly on the next sentence.

"You were my first real friend."

That made you blink. It nearly stopped you, but not quite.

Still, you didn't turn around. Not yet.

"I don't give two shits," you muttered.

There was a long silence behind you. Just her breathing. Just her thinking.

She opened her mouth. "Me and Denji... we were never anything."

Your body froze. Just like that.

"He's been in love with you since he met you."

You turned, slowly, eyes confused. Your gaze met hers for the first time in what felt like forever. 

"If you'd just let me explain..." she said softly, stepping toward you. "I'm risking a lot just saying this out loud."

You stared at her, searching her face for any sign of a lie. But she didn't flinch. She just stood there, awkward, sincere, and a little scared.

"...Why now?" you asked.

Asa shrugged a little, looking down at her shoes for a moment. "Because I know what it's like to lose everything. And I don't want to be the reason someone else does."

There was another long pause. You didn't know what to say. She didn't expect you to.

"Okay."

Chapter Text

"Really?" 

"Yes." 

For a moment, she just stood there, staring at you with wide, disbelieving eyes. Without warning, she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around you.

It was clumsy and too tight, like she wasn't used to hugging people, like the gesture felt foreign to her body. But it was sincere.

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden contact. Her cheek pressed against yours as she clung to you a little longer than expected.

"I thought you hated me," she mumbled against your shirt. "I thought I ruined everything."

You let out a slow breath, your hand awkwardly patting her back. "You didn't help," you said honestly. "But... I get it. I guess you could say I overreacted." 

You stayed like that for another beat, for once, it didn't feel forced.

You gently pulled away. "I have to get back to class," you said, voice softer now.

Asa nodded, "Yeah. Right. Me too."

You took a few steps down the hallway, but she called out to you one last time.

"Thank you!"

In truth, you were still fuming. The anger hadn't disappeared, it just settled beneath the surface. But forgiveness felt like a necessary step if you ever wanted people to stay. It's like that old saying, forgive, but never forget.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

You arrived home after school and collapsed onto the couch, your bag sliding off your shoulder and thudding to the floor. The day had been a blur, your mind distant, like you were still walking through fog.

There was something tugging at the edge of your consciousness, something you hadn't quite processed.

And then it hit you.

The kiss.

The kiss with Yoshida.

It was insane. Unexpected. Intense in a way you weren't ready for. His hands gripping your face, the quiet urgency behind it, the way it ended just as suddenly as it began. You'd replayed it a hundred times already, and every time your stomach twisted up in knots.

Your cheeks burned at the thought. What did it mean? Was it impulsive? Did he regret it? Did you?

You were so deep in thought that you didn't even hear the door until it clicked open.

Your heart jumped into your throat.

Shit.

Panic set in immediately. You had no idea how to face him. Should you say something? Act normal? Ignore it completely? Laugh it off?

Your body moved before your brain did, legs scrambling to push you off the couch and sprint down the hallway. You slammed the bathroom door shut behind you and locked it, pressing your back flat against the wood like it could protect you.

You stood there in silence, straining to hear his movements.

Nothing. Just the faint sound of keys hitting the table... followed by the creak of the couch cushions.

A few minutes passed and then you heard snoring.

You blinked. He's asleep? 

You furrowed your brows. How the hell did he fall asleep that fast?

Slowly, but carefully, you unlocked the door. The click was quiet, but your heart still pounded in your chest as you cracked it open and peeked out.

"Who are you hiding from?"

You shrieked, stumbling back as his voice cut through the silence.

Yoshida stood right outside the door, arms crossed, expression unreadable, but you swore there was a trace of amusement in his eyes.

You landed on your ass with a grunt. "God—! Are you serious?! Were you standing there the whole time?!"

He shrugged, crouching down to eye-level with you. "About half of it. You're not very subtle."

You rubbed your face with both hands. "Am I that easy to predict?"

"Yeah." Yoshida tilted his head, his tone calm but pointed. "You always forget you could just disappear from my sight whenever you want. That's exactly why I have to keep an eye on you. You don't think."

You let out a sharp breath and rolled your eyes. "Sure, that's definitely the only reason." you said sarcastically.

His expression tightened, his eyes narrowing in irritation. Genuine, sharp-edged annoyance. It was scary to see on him, almost unsettling.

"You're not that important," he said coldly. "Don't mistake surveillance for interest. I have no intention of forming any kind of relationship with you, platonic nor romantic." Without waiting for a response, he turned away and dropped onto the couch, as if that ended the conversation.

You stared at him, unimpressed. "You're so full of yourself, it's almost embarrassing," you said, voice low. "Acting like you're above everyone, like your pride makes you untouchable. It's pathetic." 

You glanced his way, only to catch him smirking to himself subtly, like he was proud of something you didn't find remotely amusing. He didn't even look up from the newspaper in his hands. It irritated you more than it should've.

You muttered under your breath and stomped over to the front door, yanking your shoes on with aggressive energy.

"Where are we going?" Yoshida asked casually, still flipping a page like this was all part of some routine game you played.

You stood upright, zipping your coat with purpose. "I'm going to Denji's," you said calmly. "I need to talk to him."

That got his attention. He lowered the paper slightly, eyes flickering up to you.

"And tomorrow," you added, reaching for the door, "I'm seeing Asa. So don't wait around for me."

The paper hit the coffee table with a dull thud as Yoshida rose from the couch with sudden, deliberate force. "Look at you, so popular. I don't know how many times I have to say it," he said, voice sharper now. "You're not going anywhere alone."

You turned on your heel and faced him. "And I'm supposed to just believe you? That you're assigned to babysit me like some undercover chaperone?" You stepped closer, eyes narrowed. "You've never even shown me proof. For all I know, you're just following me around for fun."

"I told you the truth. You're not safe out there alone," he snapped.

"I told you where I'm going," you shot back. "I didn't have to. I was being considerate. But clearly that was a waste of time."

You reached for the door handle, fingers barely grazing the cold metal, when suddenly, his hand closed around your wrist. Firm. Unflinching.

You gasped slightly and tried to jerk back, but he didn't let go.

"You want proof?" he asked quietly, his expression unreadable, his voice lower. "Fine. I'll give you proof."

Your brows drew together in confusion, breath hitching slightly. "What are you talking about?"

Yoshida's grip loosened just enough to let your arm fall, but he didn't step back. "You're coming with me. On a mission."

Your eyes widened. "What?"

"You want to know why I'm here? Why I've been watching you?" He reached into his coat to search for his car keys, dangling them infront of you. "You'll see it for yourself. What you are, and what you're tangled up in... it's a hell of a lot bigger than Denji or your schoolgirl drama with Asa." 

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"What is this place?"

Yoshida didn't stop walking. His hands were buried in the pockets of his coat as he stepped through the fog-thin air. The scent of old stone and damp soil clung to your clothes the moment you stepped out of the car.

"Don't tell me you've never been to a graveyard before," he said, not even glancing back at you.

You had been walking for what felt like ages, first the long drive, then an even longer hike through a dirt path full with fallen leaves and rusted signs. You were getting tired, your legs aching with each step, but you didn't show it. Yoshida, of course, looked like he hadn't even broken a sweat.

You followed silently, your eyes scanning the gravestones. The place was ancient, almost abandoned. Time had chipped away at the stones, moss crawling over names and dates. But as you passed the next row, something odd caught your eye.

Under each name was a single word, etched in the same blocky letters.

"Bomb."

"Katana."

"Spear."

"Whip."

The realization came slowly, making you lost in thought.

"These names... They're all devil hybrids, aren't they?"

Yoshida finally turned, the corners of his mouth tugging into a faint smile.

"Smart. Yeah. Devil hybrids. Most people don't get this far without ending up in one of these holes." He walked ahead a few paces before gesturing lazily toward the stones. "Take a good look. You might recognize some of them."

You followed, slower now, eyes still flicking from one stone to the next.

"So this is our mission?" you asked. "What, a reminder of where we're headed if we screw up?"

Yoshida paused. The wind picked up, brushing dead leaves around his ankles.

"Read the gravestones," he said, voice lower. "See anything they have in common?"

You squinted. "They're all hybrids. They're all dead."

"They were chosen," he replied. 

You blinked. "Chosen?" 

He kept walking again, hands still in his coat. "They made deals. Pacts. They were picked by their devils and turned into something else. Something powerful." 

He turned to look at you over his shoulder, eyes dark and unreadable. "But you weren't chosen, were you? You were born this way." 

That struck something in you. A cold kind of discomfort that spread from your stomach outward."What the hell are you talking about?" you asked, irritation seeping into your voice. 

"You weren't supposed to exist." He shrugged. "No pact. No contract. You just... happened. That kind of thing gets attention." 

You let out a disbelieving laugh. "You couldn't be more wrong. I wasn't born this way. One day, out of nowhere, a devil chose me, like you said, and since then, I've had these abilities. I was normal before that. Before the pact." You stopped in your tracks, arms crossed tightly over your chest, like you were holding the truth in place.

Yoshida halted a few steps ahead before slowly turning to face you, his expression unreadable. Instead of laughing, he shook his head.

"That's not what happened," he said, voice low and sure.

You frowned. "What the hell are you talking about? I remember it. I made the deal—"

"No," he cut in, firmer now. "You think you did. But devils don't choose without a reason. They don't waste power on chance. The contract? It wasn't the start. It was just the activation."

You stared at him. "That doesn't make sense. Why would—"

"Because that something was already in you," he said. "They saw it before you ever did. Maybe even before you existed." His gaze held yours, steady and unblinking. "You weren't just chosen. You were made for this."

The wind pressed around you again, but this time it felt colder.

You clenched your jaw, fists curling at your sides. "Man, fuck you, you're not making any sense. I don't care about any of this. About where, when, or how I'll die. If you dragged me all the way out here just to scare me with some creepy hybrid graveyard story—" 

"Then you're dumber than I thought." Yoshida's voice cut in sharply, for once shedding that lazy tone he always wore. "This isn't about fear. This is about truth." 

He stepped closer. "Let me simplify it for you. You don't know what you are. But a lot of other people do. And they don't plan on waiting around to see how dangerous you'll become."

Yoshida stepped even closer, his shoes crunching against the brittle grass. When he finally stood inches from you, his voice dropped.

"Though, I knew you'd think that way. So stubborn. So rebellious." His smile widened, though it didn't reach his eyes. "I brought you here to teach you a lesson."

You blinked. "Why me?" you snapped. "Do you do this to all your... bodyguard assignments?"

Yoshida's expression didn't waver. Not even a twitch.

"No," he said simply. "Only the ones this stupid."

He reached out and gently touched your jaw. For a second, heat bloomed in your chest, not from embarrassment, but confusion, and maybe something else.

"Now."

You barely registered the whisper before a shadow split from the ground behind you.

You spun around and out from the base of an old, broken gravestone rose a figure covered in stitched flesh and wires, something vaguely human but unnaturally still. Its jaw hung loose like a marionette, and a drill-like tail spun behind it, screeching with mechanical noises.

A hybrid. And not just any devil, something unregistered.

"You fucking bastard!" you shouted at Yoshida, staggering back.

"Observation isn't enough anymore," he said coolly. "I had to see what you really are. What you can do. Or what you're afraid of doing."

The hybrid lunged, as your body reacted before your mind could. The world bent for a second, and suddenly, it wasn't lunging at you.

It was lunging at nothing.

The hybrid skidded past, confused, snarling. It turned around, looking straight through you.

It couldn't see you.

You looked down at your own hands, they were there. You were there. But not to it.

You'd made yourself vanish from its perception.

But the effort to do so hit you like a migraine. Your knees buckled, a shrill ringing in your ears. Using these powers drained your energy the more you used them. 

"Too much?" Yoshida called, arms crossed as he watched. "Reality distortion's tricky. You overuse it, and maybe you forget you're even there."

The hybrid swung at where you used to stand, hitting nothing but air.

You closed your eyes for half a second, and that was all it took.

You saw a flash.

Your blood pooling in the soil.

Yoshida kneeling beside your broken body.

A voice whispering, "This was always going to happen."

You gasped, stumbling back.

Was that a premonition? Or another lie? Another fake future?

The hybrid shrieked, a grotesque, garbled cry and charged again.

This time, you focused. Not on erasing yourself. On erasing its sense of direction.

Your eyes locked onto its flickering form, and for a moment it stopped.

It froze, turning around as it started to crawl at the empty air behind it, biting at shadows that didn't exist, convinced you were standing there.

You staggered again. The line between the real and false futures was blurring fast. You saw flickers in the edges of your mind: Yoshida dead. The hybrid bowing before you. Denji, screaming your name. Your brother, gone again.

You pressed your palms against your head, panting.

"Stop this," you yelled out. "I'm not your experiment!"

"No," Yoshida said softly, stepping forward. "You're something worse. A variable." He tilted his head. "And variables get people killed."

You staggered backwards. "Since when do you cars about people?"

The hybrid charged one final time, and you let go.

Your eyes glowed faintly, not with power but with emptiness. The Unknown Devil's energy surged through you, and the air rippled like water. Every gravestone shifted, multiplied, melted into new forms.

The hybrid screamed, not from pain, but from confusion. Its own arms detached and began spinning, tearing into its body. It was attacking itself, lost in the unreality you'd crafted.

A minute later, it fell to the ground, motionless.

The silence afterward was loud.

Yoshida clapped. Once. Slowly.

"I was right," he said with a straight face. "You really are terrifying."

You wiped the blood from your nose, glaring at him with the weight of your whole soul.

"And you're a bitch."

He tilted his head. "Probably. But now you know this isn't a game. Everyone wants something from you. Some want you dead. Some want to use you. Me?" He chuckled.

"I just want to see what happens when the Unknown Devil breaks loose." 

You collapsed onto the dirt with a heavy sigh, the grave-soaked air burning in your lungs.

Blood smeared your temple, your vision blurred at the edges like someone had smudged the world. You weren't sure if the buzzing in your ears was real or just another false echo from your powers.

Lost in thought, you didn't notice footsteps crunching beside you.

Yoshida crouched down slowly, his expression unreadable. His gloved hand reached forward and grabbed your jaw, tilting your face up until you had no choice but to meet his eyes. His fingers were cold against your burning skin.

"Tired already?" he asked, voice soft, mockingly gentle.

You gave a faint, breathless nod. "Mhm."

He flashed you a creepy smile.

"Too bad."

You tried mumbling something, anything, but Yoshida put his hand on your mouth. 

"Shh..." He said as he dragged your almost lifeless body across the graveyard, setting you down on one of the grave's dirt. 

He stood over you, his eyes sharp and almost fond in a way that made your skin crawl. He let out a laugh that almost sounded like a cry.

"I can't risk you being out there, in the open," he said, his tone calm. "Where anybody could kill you, my love."

His words lingered in the air like smoke.

"Or worse," he added, circling you slowly, eyes never leaving your face, "have you kill someone innocent. I can't let them take you away. I won't let them lock you up like some experiment gone wrong."

You pushed yourself up onto your forearms, heart pounding, breath shallow. "You're insane," you whispered, eyes wide. "You can't seriously think-"

"I'm the only one who sees it clearly," he cut in. "They'll never understand what you are. But I do. I know what you're capable of, and I know how fragile everything is when you lose control."

He crouched beside you now, one hand resting loosely on his knee. His gaze softened, but the threat behind it only sharpened.

"You think you're scared of yourself?" he asked gently. "You should see what they'd do to you if they ever got the chance. I'm doing this for you."

You flinched back, trying to shift your weight, but something still held you down, perhaps fear itself.

"I don't need you to understand," Yoshida said, rising again. "I just need you to stop fighting."

He turned his back for a moment, staring off into the distance like the world beyond meant nothing.

"And Denji?" you asked suddenly, your voice trembling despite the heat in it. "Does he know what you're doing?"

Yoshida's body stilled. Then he exhaled through his nose.

"He'll understand eventually," he said, not turning around. "He always does. He just needs time. He'll get over you sooner or later."

He looked back at you and there was something final in his expression. Something unmovable.

"He cares about you, sure. But me? I'll protect you. Even if it means protecting you from yourself."

You shook your head, voice cracking. "No. You're not gonna do this to me. I can't live like this anymore."

You forced yourself upright, using the gravestone for support. Your legs trembled beneath you, your vision still foggy, but you stood. "I've had enough of you. I have no idea about anything you're talking about. Leave me alo—"

Yoshida closed the distance in a second. He grabbed your chin, not rough, but firm enough to silence you and stared into your eyes.

"You say that like you still have a choice," he murmured.

Without a warning, he pulled you into a kiss.

It was forceful, desperate, but not cruel. His hand slipped to your waist, drawing you closer like he needed you there to keep from falling apart, before sliding it down and squeezing your ass. 

Your mind screamed to resist, but your body betrayed you, melting into him as his hand stayed firm on your waist, trailing heat through the fabric of your shirt. He groaned low against your mouth when your hips instinctively tilted closer, like your body remembered something your pride wanted to forget.

You gasped against his lips, but he didn't stop, only pressed harder, tongue teasing past your lips, hungry and slow. His body molded against yours firmly, like he'd been holding back for too long.

Your fingers curled into his coat, gripping tight, not to push him away, but to hold on. To steady yourself as his hands slid lower, dangerously close to the heat between your legs. You felt him everywhere, his breath, his hands, the heat of his chest pressed to yours as your thighs trembled with need.

The world narrowed to this, his mouth, your skin, the burn building fast and hot beneath it all.

When he finally pulled back, his breath was shaky against your lips, his forehead pressed to yours. 

Both of you were breathless, your chest heaving as you tried to recover, the night air sharp against your sweat-slicked skin.

You backed away slowly, legs trembling, hand groping for support until you found the cold, jagged edge of a gravestone behind you. You leaned on it, trying to catch your breath, trying to steady your fear that had now morphed into a deep-rooted panic.

"Stop... Please," you whispered, your voice desperate.

Yoshida's lips curled into a twisted smile. "Say that again," he dared, stepping closer, shadows flickering unnaturally around his feet.

The ground rippled. From the dirt itself, slick, black tentacles erupted, writhing and twisting like serpents in a feeding frenzy. They surrounded you, trapping you in their maze of sinew and dark power.

"I said stop harassing me!" you cried, louder this time, your voice cracking from the strain.

But it was too late. A cluster of tentacles shot toward you, coiling tightly around your waist, your arms, your legs. You screamed as they constricted, stealing your breath, lifting you from the ground. You thrashed helplessly as you were pulled forward, face-to-face with Yoshida. His eyes gleamed with sick amusement, his smile cold and inhuman.

He tilted his head. "You always look prettiest when you're suffering."

He was interrupted when a small rock was flicked at his head, making a hollow thunk as it hit his temple. Yoshida's head snapped in the direction it came from. Yours did too.

In the foggy distance, you could barely make it out at first, the jagged outline of something metallic... spinning.

A chainsaw?

The figure moved closer, the engine growing louder with every step, making his features more recognizable. 

"DENJI!" you cried out, voice cracking with relief.

Yoshida's lips curled into a smile.

Without hesitation, he swung one of his tentacles toward the oncoming blur to prevent him from coming any closer. But Denji leapt into the air, letting the black limb crash into the dirt with enough force to kick up a thick fog puddle that swallowed the area in mist.

A familiar laugh echoed out of the haze. "Didn't know you had a tentacle fetish, man. You told me you only used those in emergency situations." He laughed, a sarcastic tone to his voice which he knew would make Yoshida fume. 

Yoshida's eye twitched. "You're always running your mouth."

He raised a thick tendril and slammed it forward. You watched it hit Denji square in the chest, hard. You screamed, thinking it was over.

"No!" you cried, eyes wide, lungs burning.

You turned your head away, unable to watch whatever was coming next.

"...Anyway," Yoshida muttered, turning back toward you, the calm back in his voice. "Where were we?"

Yoshida interrupted himself, hissing, twisting around, just in time to see Denji grin wildly, chainsaw buzzing, as he sliced clean through the tentacle that had just struck him.

"You hit like a bitch," Denji joked, chunks of flesh flying as he ran full-speed toward you.

Yoshida groaned in frustration, trying to summon another tendril, but it barely formed before Denji tripped over a grave marker, fell face-first, and slid across the mud like a drunk action figure.

"What the hell—?!" Yoshida blinked, genuinely confused.

Denji didn't miss a beat. From the ground, he revved his chainsaw and while lying flat, sawed straight through Yoshida's foot.

Yoshida screamed in pain and stumbled backward, blood spurting.

"I'm not even trying that hard, dude!" Denji shouted, flipping onto his feet like an idiot who just won a breakdancing contest. "You're losing to a guy who just ate three expired hot dogs."

"You absolute moron," Yoshida hissed, trying to summon more tendrils, but they writhed weakly, his focus breaking from blood loss. 

At the same time, the devil's tendrils suddenly retracted, vanishing into the darkness with a sickening snap. Without their grip, your body dropped like dead weight, slamming hard into the cold ground. 

Pain shot up your leg as your ankle twisted sharply beneath you. You gasped, letting out a choked groan as your vision blurred with tears.

Denji turned at the sound immediately, his eyes darting to your crumpled figure. 

He didn't bother asking if you were okay, he could see you weren't. With surprising gentleness, he scooped you up and slung you over his shoulder.

"Hey, ow, careful!" you yelped as he jostled your sore leg.

"You'll be alright." Denji laughed as he started sprinting through the trees. "Try not to die while I'm playing hero."

"How the hell did you even find me?!" you asked, still clinging to his back.

"That's a story for tomorrow," Denji replied, breathless. "Kinda hard to explain while I'm sprinting."

There was a beat of silence, only the sound of running and the crackle of leaves beneath his boots.

Then you smiled, despite the pain. "Thanks for coming."

Denji didn't respond right away, but you felt his grip tighten slightly, just enough to be noticed. "You kidding?" he finally said. "You think I'd let someone like you get eaten by some freak with tentacles?"

You blinked. "Someone like me?"

He gave the smallest shrug without slowing. "Yeah. Y'know... the kind of person I don't hate."

You let out a weak laugh, one hand gripping the fabric of his sleeve as your head slumped lightly against his back.

For the first time all night, you felt safe.

Chapter Text

"Here you go."

Denji handed you a warm cup of tea after gently wrapping a blanket around your shoulders.

"Thank you. Really," you mumbled, your fingers curling around the mug. "You sure it's okay that I'm here?"

He was in the kitchen, doing something on the stove when his hand slipped and touched the surface. He yelped and jumped back, quickly waving his hand to cool it off.

"Totally fine," he said, trying to play it cool with a dumb smile. "Nayuta doesn't mind. Right?"

"I do, actually." she said flatly from the other room.

Denji sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, well... too bad."

You couldn't help but laugh under your breath, sipping your tea. The warmth spread through your chest, calming your nerves. 

You broke the silence. "Denji... I'm sorry. About before. I overreacted and you didn't deserve any of that." You started stuttering over your words.

"Stop apologizing," he said, his voice soft. He leaned against the counter, eyes fixed on the stove as it clicked off. "If I thought you didn't deserve saving I wouldn't have done it."

Your smile faded. You shifted on the couch, adjusting the blanket. "But how did you even find me? I was in the middle of nowhere."

His eyes flicked toward you with a grin. "Have I never told you about my excellent nose? I can smell you from miles away." He tilted his head down a little as if embarrassed. "Especially you."

You felt something warm bloom in your chest, and it took effort not to let it show too much. "Yeah, so I've heard," you said with a small smile. "But why now? Did you... sense I was in danger or someth–"

"Shhh." Denji jumped over to you, pressing his palm over your mouth mid-sentence.

You raised your brows, and without thinking, you licked his hand.

His face twisted instantly. "Aw, gross!"

Pulling back, you wiped your mouth with the blanket. "Gross? You're the one cooking with unwashed hands!"

Denji sucked his lips in, clearly trying not to laugh, and turned toward the bathroom. "You're lucky you didn't do that yesterday. I was cutting raw chicken."

Your eyes went wide. "Oh my god."

"Don't worry," he called over his shoulder, already halfway down the hall, "I totally probably washed them after."

"Totally probably?" you repeated.

From the bathroom came the sound of running water and his muffled voice. "Hey, I'm still alive, so it's fine!"

You shook your head, smiling despite yourself. "Yeah, as if being disgusting ever did anything to you." You mumbled under your breath. 

As he turned the water off, he came out in the doorway, hands dripping, and his grin wider than ever before. "See? Clean. Wanna lick 'em again to check?"

You rolled your eyes. "You're fucking gross."

"And yet you keep hanging around." he said, plopping down next to you and stealing your blanket.

You scoffed and yanked the blanket toward you, refusing to let go. The two of you kept playing tug of war until Denji gave one hard pull, sending you tumbling forward and landing face-first in his lap.

You laughed in the blanket, letting your body go limp in defeat as Denji threw his arms up and shouted like he'd just won a championship.

Blushing, you sat up next to him, this time a lot closer than before. It felt good and weird at the same time to smile genuinely again after so long.

Denji rubbed the back of his neck. "Y'know... I've done some thinking these past few months. You not being around really changed me."

His words hit you straight in the heart, but in a warm way. "You? Thinking?" You joked to hide your blush. 

Denji raised an eyebrow. "Stop being such a smartass." He said, poking at your stomach, slowly starting to poke his way up your tits.

You slapped his hand away and laughed, but before you could make a comment again, there was a sudden knock at the door, three quick knocks that made both of you freeze.

You looked at Denji as he stared at the door, worried. 

"Who is that?" Nayuta yelled from the other room.

Denji stood up and started making his way to the door. "Don't worry." He said, to both Nayuta and you.

You watched him walk with his usual careless confidence and peek through the peephole. You'd be lying if you said your stomach wasn't slightly twisting with worry.

He stood there for a few seconds, but it felt like hours. Finally, he turned around toward you. "There's no one-"

The rest of his sentence was cut off by the sound of a gunshot. A bullet punched through the peephole, tearing straight into his forehead.

You screamed as warm blood sprayed across the walls, the floor, your face. 

"Where's the girl?" 

The door burst open. Men in sharp, formal uniforms stepped inside, breaking anything in their way. You didn't think, you just listened to your instincts and let your body melt into the air, your body blurring until you were invisible.

Nayuta shuffled out of her room, rubbing her eyes. "What's with all the-" She stopped cold when she saw Denji sprawled on the floor, blood pooling around his head.

For a moment, her eyes were wide with shock. She knew he wasn't dead, it would take more than that to kill him, but she also knew what they were doing. Buying time.

Her expression dropped. "That girl." She said furiously, turning her head toward you.

With a flick of her wrist, an invisible force snapped forward. One man's head jerked violently as if yanked by a leash, and twisted with a grotesque crack, all while staring directly at you.

Another man raised his weapon, but his arm bent backward at an impossible angle before he could fire. His scream cut was short when an unseen blade sliced across his throat.

Two more lunged for her, but they didn't make it far. They stopped mid-step, their eyes bulging as their bodies crumpled like paper, every bone inside collapsing under her will.

Within seconds, the room was silent again except for the sound of Denji groaning and trying to push himself upright, blood still dripping down his face.

Nayuta didn't even glance at the bodies. Her eyes locked straight onto the spot where you stood, invisible, and she hissed. 

You froze, every bone and muscle of your body tight, your eyes burning as they looked around the blood-smeared room. Your mouth hung open, trembling on the edge of words.

"I-" You choked on your voice. "I'm so sorry-"

"GET OUT!"

Her shout slammed through the walls like an earthquake, startling you to the core. It took a few seconds before you could even move again. Your knees felt weak as you grabbed your bag and started walking toward the door.

You stopped just outside the door, glancing back. "When will I be able to see him aga-"

The door slammed in your face, cutting the sentence, and you, off.

You just stood there for a second, staring at the wooden door like it might give you an answer. It didn't. You looked up, rubbed the tears from under your eyes, and forced yourself up straight before walking away.

The cold air outside cut into your skin, sharp enough to wake you but not enough to clear the ache in your chest. You didn't know what the hell to do next. The only thing you could think to do was send a text.

You pulled out your old flip phone, your fingers shaking.

hey. m sorry for today. text me back whenever you can. please.

To: denji ^3^

You shoved the phone back in your pocket and turned the corner, pulling out a cigarette. The first drag burned your throat and you slid down the wall until you were sitting on the cold pavement, head in your palm.

You didn't feel safe anywhere.

Your so-called "advantage," invisibility, meant nothing to them, the hybrids. If you were going to survive this, you had to learn how to vanish from devil hybrids too, not just devils or normal humans.

After a long minute, you pushed yourself up, let the smoke escape from your lips and disappear from sight before heading toward your apartment. You weren't even sure it was still standing, Public Safety had a habit of leaving nothing behind.

"Public Safety, huh..." you muttered under your breath.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

The alarm pulled you out of your sleep. You reached for the snooze button, missed, and grabbed the whole thing and smashed it down onto the bedstand until the ringing died.

You laid there, eyes barely open, staring at the broken pieces scattered across the floor.

It didn't matter. None of it mattered.

What mattered was the phone you grabbed from your nightstand, the screen lighting up on your tired face. Your message still sat there at the bottom of the chat, unanswered.

No reply. No little dot, no nothing.

Your heart sank into your stomach. The room felt colder and emptier.

Sleep was out of the question now. And besides, today wasn't a day for hiding under the covers.

You had someone to meet.

The café was warm when you stepped inside, bells above the door ringing softly. The smell of coffee and toasted bread woke you up enough. 

And there she was. Asa, sitting in the same booth where you first met. She looked up the second you walked in and her face lit up. She pushed her chair back so fast it scraped loudly against the tile and waved both hands, nearly knocking over her cup.

"Thank you for coming!" she said, her voice a little too eager.

You smiled, but it didn't reach your eyes. You slid your flip phone into your pocket after one last quick glance at the empty notification bar. Still nothing.

Sliding into the booth, you forced cheer into your voice. "Of course. I... it's been a while."

"It has," Asa agreed quickly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. She looked nervous, her knee bouncing under the table. "You look... good." She hasn't looked so awkward in her life. 

You gave a small laugh. "Thanks. You too. I mean, better than the last time we saw each other. You don't look like you're ready to shit yourself anymore."

That earned a genuine chuckle from her. "Yeah, I finally slept for more than four hours. Exams are ending soon, too. It's nice. I even started reading again."

You finished talking to the waitress that took your order and averted your attention to Asa again. "Still spending all your free time buried in those books?"

Asa looked down to her cup. "...Yeah. Mostly school stuff. I've been rereading my literature notes."

You crossed your arms. "I'm surprised you didn't bring flashcards on our date." You said jokingly. 

Her lips pressed into a thin line, then softened just a little. "It's not just studying. I like... figuring out how people write. Why they write. I guess it makes the world feel less..." she paused, frowning as though she'd already said too much. "less pointless."

You tilted your head. "Didn't know you were so poetic."

Asa laughed as her eyes flickered down to your hands, to the phone sitting closed on the table. The smile on her lips trembled, as if she'd been holding something back.

"Have you... been doing okay?" she asked carefully.

You hesitated, fingers tracing the rim of your cup. "Yeah. I mean... I try. Some days are harder than others."

"I get that." She looked down, quiet for a long moment before forcing herself to meet your eyes again. "I should've... I should've said this a long time ago. But I didn't know how."

Her voice and body language immidiately changed.

Your chest tightened with worry, both for her and what she had to say. "What do you mean?"

"I'm sorry," she blurted out. Her hands twisted together. "For making it seem like I stole him. Like I pushed you away."

The small talk evaporated instantly, the warmth around you dissapearing. You froze, unable to answer.

She leaned forward, her words coming out before you could fully process them. "It's not what you think. I wasn't being fair to you. I wasn't being honest with you, or even with myself." Her voice shook with embarrassment. "You deserve to know the truth. The whole truth."

Her eyes looked down to your phone again.

"You keep checking it," she said softly.

You froze. "Habit."

"Denji?"

His name hit harder than you wanted it to. Your throat tightened and you straightened up your voice. "Just go on with your story."

Silence surrounded you again. Asa stared at her coffee, as if debating whether to keep speaking. When she finally did, her voice was barely above a whisper.

"I didn't want it to be like this. Between us. Between you and him."

"I thought you were just..." You trailed off, unsure if finishing the sentence would hurt her or yourself more.

She rolled her eyes. "Selfish? Manipulative? Trust me, I've called myself worse." She shook her head.

There was something you'd never seen Asa show before. Fear, shame, and guilt all together.

"It's hard when you have to fight yourself every second of every day. I'm not just Asa." she said, her body tensing up even more as her voice got quieter. "I'm a hybrid. The shitty War Devil lives inside me. Yoru. She's part of me. Everything you saw... every time things felt wrong or confusing, it wasn't just me. It was her too." She looked into your eyes with pure terror, you knew she was telling the truth.

"And Denji..." She paused, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand before the tears could fall. "He never stopped loving you. Not once. Even when you thought he was gone, even when you thought he didn't care, he did. I've seen it. He's cried over you, more than you'd believe. He's thought of you all this time."

You blinked, stunned at her words as your mouth hung. 

Her eyes turned dead. "He loves you so much it terrifies him. Because you're the one thing he can't stand to lose." She looked down. "I'm surprised why he even talks to me still, when he knows I'm the reason everything happened the way it did."

You wouldn't want to admit it, but her words shattered you. All the late nights staring at the ceiling, all the doubt and ache you had carried pressing down on you until it couldn't.

"Asa..." you whispered.

She shook her head. "You don't have to say anything. Just, please. Go to him."

You stared at her, still in shock. The café suddenly felt too small and the air too heavy to breathe. Before you knew it, you were on your feet and out the door, each step heavier than the last.

The streets became quieter as you got near his apartment complex. The cracked concrete steps and the rusted railings were just as you remembered them. 

Your pulse pounded in your ears as you slowed down, forcing yourself to breathe and calm down. You didn't want to look like you'd just sprinted across half the city, even though you kind of did.

You climbed the last step and froze. You heard voices. Familiar voices.

Someone was already there.

You pressed yourself against the wall, careful not to make a sound.

"...She's dangerous, Denji."

Your heart stopped for a second. You could recognize that voice anywhere.

You heard it, no doubt, Denji's tired and annoyed voice. "She's not dangerous. She's just... she's just..."

"No." Fumiko cut him off. "You don't understand. People like her, people with that kind of power, they lose control. They hurt everyone around them. Even the ones they love."

Your breath caught in your throat.

Is she talking about me?

You pressed against the wall closer, more careful.

"She doesn't even know what she is yet," Fumiko continued. "That makes her unpredictable. The Public Safety won't look the other way forever. If you keep her close, she'll drag you down with her."

Silence followed her words. A long, unbearable silence.

You pressed your palm against the wall to steady yourself, but your pulse was frantic.

"I don't care. I..." He stopped, like the words burned in his mouth. "She's not like that."

"You want to believe that," Fumiko shot back. "But how many times have you been wrong before? How many people have you lost because you ignored the warning signs?"

The silence that followed was worse than any scream.

Your whole body shook. It felt like fate was punching you from every direction. You couldn't run from it. 

You wanted to run in, scream, demand that Denji denies it, that he fight for you,

The light above the apartment door flickered. A low hum met your ears, the kind of sound that didn't belong in the world you knew of.

Your hand was trembling as you pressed it to your chest, only to feel pulsing, something that wasn't your heartbeat.

A shadow stretched from your feet, across the concrete like ink in water. The flickering light above the door shattered, dimming the hallway.

From inside the apartment, Fumiko's voice dropped. "...Did you hear that?"

Your body snapped back, hiding the shadows before they could be seen. Sweat rolled down your forehead as your breathing got heavier with each second.

You didn't want them to know it was you, even though she probably already did.

Because you knew she could use this against you, while you were at your most vulnerable.

"This is what I mean. It's already happening. She's losing control. Denji, you have to listen-"

Your stomach turned upside down.

Every part of you screamed to burst through that door, to defend yourself, to grab him and never let go. 

You pressed your back against the wall, shaking, listening to the muffled sound of Denji's frustrated voice.

"Denji," Fumiko said, her voice softer this time. "You don't see it because you don't want to. But I've been around people like her before. They all say the same things. They all promise they won't lose control. And then... then the blood bath starts."

You shut your eyes tight as you clenched your fists.

"You don't know shit," Denji said. His chair scraped against the floor. You could picture him pacing, running a hand through his hair like he always did when he was frustrated. "She's not a monster. She's... she's the only one who's ever-"

He stopped. Your heart twisted. 

The only one who's ever what?

Fumiko sighed heavily. "You think that. But that's exactly what makes her so dangerous. You care too much. She'll use that against you, even if she doesn't mean to. Even if it kills you."

The silence that followed was unbearable.

You leaned closer to the door, chest tight, praying for him to say something, anything.

"...Sometimes I think you're right," Denji muttered.

Your blood ran cold.

The shadows around you started shaking, like static.

"I'm not saying she's a bad person," he went on, his voice quieter this time. "But... sometimes when I look at her, I get scared too. Like maybe one day I'll wake up and she won't be herself anymore. That it'll all be gone." He said, "Like the only person who once gave me will to live will be gone."

His words stabbed you. You couldn't take it anymore. You opened the front door ever so slightly and didn't even bother closing it behind you. Your eyes were locked on Denji and the whore next to him. 

Fumiko scooted closer, her face only a breath away from his. "That fear is your instinct, Denji. It's what's kept you alive this long. Listen to it."

Denji exhaled.

"You don't have to carry this alone." Fumiko said, her voice dropping, more intimate.

You had been so careful. Careful not to make a sound, careful to keep your existence blurred enough that no one would notice you standing there in the doorway. Denji hadn't seen you yet, and Fumiko hadn't sensed you.

You started walking slowly towards them, your eyes manic, burning right through. You stood right there, right next to them, but they didn't seem to hear you, or even see you.

That was a first.

Your thoughts were interrupted when you saw Fumiko lean in. And kiss him.

The world around you became silent.

The invisibility you wore around yourself broke. For just a heartbeat, the space around you shook, and Denji's eyes snapped slightly, like he'd felt something but couldn't see it. His eyes turned toward where you stood, but they looked past you, as if your body was no more important than a shadow on the wall.

She finally pulled back, her voice dropping. "You see it now, don't you? She's unstable. Dangerous. You think you can save her, but look at what she is. What she makes you feel."

Her hands dropped down to hold his. "Let me show you what real love is." She said as she started to walk backwards to the bedroom. 

There's no fucking way she pulled that.

Your fists curled, nails digging into your palms until you thought you'd break the skin. The world warped around you, you made it warp although you weren't trying to.

The walls stretched impossibly tall, shadows stretched unnaturally, and Fumiko's reflection in the window behind her blinked at him even though she hadn't.

Denji stiffened. "What the fuck?"

Fumiko grabbed his arm again, firmer this time. "Do you see now? She's here." To her, your presence or power wasn't really important. She wanted Denji, and she was willing to do anything, even brainwash him if it meant she got him.

"She makes you doubt your own senses. She rewrites what's real. You won't even know what's true if you stay with her."

Your chest tightened. You wanted to scream, to step forward, to force him to see you, but you couldn't. You couldn't because she was right. Every word cut deep because there was truth behind it.

"Stop," Denji muttered, shaking his head.

"Denji," Fumiko pressed her hand against his chest, "She'll erase you. Piece by piece, until you're nothing but someone she invented in her head. You deserve someone real."

That was when you lost your grip. Reality shattered.

For Denji, the room cracked in half, one version where Fumiko was inches from him, another where her body was distorted to the point of no recognition, too tall and her smile split wide. Both were true. Both were false. You didn't even know anymore.

Fumiko gasped, even she could feel it now, she was slipping through the cracks. "Fuck... I'll kill that bitch." She said, pulling a gun from her pants.

Denji fell back, gripping the floor as he watched. His eyes darted everywhere, windows, floor, his own reflection, as if all of them were whispering to him at once.

"I... I can't trust her anymore."

And there it was. The words that tore you in half.

Everything froze in an instant. 

And in that silence, Fumiko turned toward you. Her eyes widened, finally, she saw you. "There." She pulled her weapon free, her whole body tense. "You saw for yourself."

The invisibility was gone. The false walls crumbled. Denji's eyes locked onto you at last.

Your body felt like it was empty and hollow, carved out from the inside. His words still spun in your mind, louder than the pounding of your heart.

I can't trust her anymore.

Your eyes twitched, wanting to pull something out of the void, something impossible. But you didn't. You couldn't. Not when Denji's eyes were on you like that.

He wasn't angry. He wasn't relieved. He just... looked broken. 

"This is what I mean, Denji. She's a threat. Look at what she just did, look at you." She tilted her head toward him. "She molded your reality. That's not love. That's poison."

"Shut up," you finally spoke up, your voice cracking. "Please, Denji, I didn't want this. I only wanted you to-"

"To what?" Fumiko snapped. "To forget? To pretend? To make him fit into the world you made up?"

Denji didn't speak.

His silence was worse than anything.

You reached for your power again without realizing, reaching at anything that could undo this, erase her words, erase her kiss, erase his doubt, but the void didn't answer. Not this time. Not when you were the one who couldn't tell what was real anymore.

Denji sighed, annoyed. "...Stop pointing that thing at her."

Fumiko's eyes flicked to him. A moment of silence followed before she started laughing frantically.

"What's so funny...?" He didn't raise or change his voice.

Your chest tightened. He defended you, but not in the way you hoped. There was no comfort, just a command.

Denji turned his head slightly, not quite meeting your face.

"...You should go."

Those words cut deeper than any blade. You stood there in silence for a few seconds to process if he actually said that.

Fumiko didn't say anything. Neither did you.

Because there was nothing left to say.

Chapter Text

You laid on the floor, eyes fixed on the ceiling as you went over your life choices.

Your chest felt heavy, sick of the constant cycle you've been trapped in, always chasing after Denji, always trying to hold on to something that slipped through your fingers no matter how tightly you clung to it. 

Every time you thought you were making progress, every time you believed things were finally steady between you, life found a way to twist the knife. There was always another dramatic turn, another gut-punch that left you questioning not just him, but yourself. 

It was exhausting. And tonight, with silence around you, you realized you had simply had enough.

Your mind replayed everything, every single misstep, and the longer you thought, the clearer it became. You didn't have to live like this. You didn't just want a change. You needed it. 

Something inside you had been suffocating. You were tired of being caught in the middle of someone else's chaos, tired of letting Denji's presence dictate your happiness.

But the truth was undeniable, you had free will. Nobody had chained you to this life. Not your parents, not Denji, not even the circumstances that had brought you here. The only one keeping you from moving forward was you.

So why were you still holding yourself back?

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"Come in!"

You took a sharp breath and pushed the door open, stepping into the room.

"Oh, I forgot to mention," the woman at the front of the room stood up, "please, have a seat."

You smiled and waved to the people in the room, feeling their eyes burn through you. 

"Class," the teacher said, gesturing toward you with welcoming, "this is our new student. Make sure to help her feel welcome."

A few soft voices rose up in response, "hi," "welcome," a few polite nods and waves.

But not everyone joined in.

The girl sitting directly in front of the desk you chose shifted just enough to glance back at you. Her eyes were sharp, as if observing you in silence. While the rest of the class greeted you, she only turned back around wordlessly, but you didn't think much of it. You came all the way here to be free of your negative thoughts, after all. 

After a few classes, you headed down to the cafeteria. The number of students there hit you right away, easily twice as many as your old school.

Back there, there wasn't even a cafeteria. Lunch was usually just two cigarettes and a prayer to get through the day.

Here, smoking wasn't an option. The fifty NO SMOKING signs plastered on every corner made sure of that.

You were distracted, staring at one of the signs while waiting in line, when you accidentally bumped into someone. Their tray clattered to the floor.

"Oh, shit. Sorry." you said quickly, crouching down to get it.

The girl gave a soft smile. "No worries." But her eyes stayed on you a little too long, like she was studying you.

"I haven't seen you around before," she said, squinting her eyes slightly.

"Yeah, I'm new. I used to go to Fourth East, shitty school."

Her jaw nearly hit the floor. "Fourth East?!" she gasped, before leaning closer and lowering her voice. "I heard devil hunters and hybrids go there. Are the rumors true?" Her eyes seemed to almost glow with excitement. "Oh my god. Do you know Chainsaw Man?!"

The moment those words left her lips, the girl who had been sitting in front of you in class, the one now standing just ahead in line, snapped her head back. Both of them stared at you, waiting for your answer.

"Uhh... firstly, nope." You forced a smile. "And I wouldn't know. Seemed pretty boring to me." 

After the conversation ended, your eyes scanned the cafeteria for a place to sit. You weren't going to hold back now, you came here for a change, after all.

"Hey, come sit with me!" The girl from your class suddenly appeared, bumping your shoulder lightly with a big smile.

You blinked at her in confusion. She had been cold toward you in class just a little while ago, but you didn't question the sudden shift.

You followed her to an empty table and sat down.

You were still slightly thrown off by her sudden friendliness. She didn't seem bothered, though, if anything, she looked energized, like she had been waiting for this moment.

"So," she began, twirling her fork between her fingers before stabbing into her macaroni, "why'd you transfer here?" She glanced at you with genuine curiosity.

You tried to play it off. "Just wanted a change. My old school wasn't... great."

Her eyes narrowed a little, studying you. "Hmm." She tilted her head, lips curving into the faintest smirk. "Did people find out you were a hybrid?"

Her words felt like a punch. Your stomach tightened, your fork halfway to your mouth. You stared at her, stunned.

"Wh–what?" You coughed, nearly choking on your food.

Reze let out an amused laugh. She dropped her fork onto her tray and leaned back in her seat, crossing her arms. "Relax. I'm not the Public Safety." She tilted her head, resting her chin against her palm. "I'm a hybrid too."

You blinked, searching her face for any sign that she was joking, but her expression didn't waver.

"I'm not sure how to respond to that," you admitted finally, setting your tray down like it suddenly weighed a ton.

She smirked again, softer this time, almost understanding. "You don't have to. I get it." She picked up her fork again, twirling noodles around it without looking at you. "Being on Public Safety's radar sucks. Always watching, always breathing down your neck, waiting for you to screw up..." She took a bite, chewed, and then sighed. "Sometimes you just wanna live like a normal person, y'know? Pretend all the devil crap doesn't exist for a little while."

Her eyes stayed on you for a moment longer than what felt casual, before she suddenly grinned widely. "Anyway, " She broke the heaviness in the air. "I'm Reze."

The school day ended, and just as you were about to head home, Reze appeared again, placing a hand on your shoulder.

"Hey, hey. Where are you going?"

You turned around, startled. "Huh? Where should I be going?"

She rolled her eyes playfully. "To my party, duh. I'm hosting it, just for you." She grabbed your hand before you could answer and started walking.

"What, now?" you asked.

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

"All of my clothes are at my apartment, though," you said as you stepped into Reze's house.

She walked toward her room, you trailing behind. "You have an apartment?" she asked while flipping open her wardrobe and started going over her outfits.

You moved over to the full-length mirror in the corner, running your hands through your hair roots. "...I mean." You hesitated. "Feels weird admitting this, but my parents had money. I'm just trying to get settled before finding a job at a café or bakery while I'm in school." You leaned closer to the mirror, checking your face. "Can I use some makeup?" you asked, puckering your lips.

Reze kept rummaging. "Yeah, girl. Go for it, it's on my desk." Her eyes lit up as she yanked out a red dress. She spun around and held it against you with a playful grin. "Actually... this would look so good on you."

You tilted your head at her. "What, are you my personal stylist now?"

"Obviously," she said, stepping back to get a better look. "I can't let you go around looking all plain when I've got options right here." She rested her hands on her hips as she analyzed you.

You laughed. "Wow, fuck you. Nice to know I was looking plain."

Reze smiled, tossing the dress onto the bed. "Hey, I'm just trying to help. Don't act like you're not flattered."

You rolled your eyes. "Fine. Maybe I'll try it later."

"Good," she said, satisfied, before turning back to her wardrobe. "Now, do you want something classy or something that screams I'm mysterious and fun?"

"Definitely not the first one," you raised an eyebrow. "I'm everything but classy."

"You'd look so sexy in it though," she said without hesitation, making a roar sound while biting down hard. 

You chuckled. "Lesbo." you slipped out of your clothes while Reze dumped her makeup bag across the desk, digging through it.

She suddenly turned around, eyes widening. "Ooooooh, girl!" she screeched, her jaw dropping. "You look so good!"

You bit your nail dramatically, pulling a face. "Stooop," you said sarcastically, brushing her off with a wave of your hand. Your other hands came up, cupping your tits in your bra and posing dramatically.

Reze gasped, laughing as she leaned against the desk. "Don't even- like you don't know how hot you are right now."

"Hot mess, maybe," you replied.

She grabbed the dress she'd picked out earlier and threw it toward you. "Put this on before I start hyping you up so much your head explodes."

You caught it against your chest and started putting it on. It felt good against your body, tight in all the right places.

Reze turned and her eyes lit up instantly. She clasped her hands together, bouncing on her heels. "See? What did I say? Perfect."

You twirled a little in front of the mirror, grinning despite yourself. "Okay... maybe you're not a terrible stylist."

The easy chatter filled the room until she suddenly asked, "I got carried away... sorry." She said. "Where were we, oh, right! About your parents. Are they still around?" She asked casually while holding another dress against herself.

Your smile faded. "Nope. My mom got crushed by a rock during a devil attack, and my dad died trying to save her." The words came out flat. You glanced at her and caught the glimpse of guilt on her face, like she wished she didn't ask.

"No, no, don't worry about it!" you quickly waved your hands. "I'm fine talking about it, it's been a while now." You went back to brushing on mascara, grounding yourself in the routine.

Reze exhaled slowly. "That was... insensitive of me," she mumbled, turning back to the closet. "Any other family?"

That one landed heavier. Thick silence filled the room as your chest tightened and the air grew heavier.

"Can we not talk about this?" you said quietly, forcing yourself to focus back on your reflection.

Reze cringed. "Sorry. I just like... getting to know people."

You softened, offering her a small smile. "No worries. What about you?"

This time, she froze completely. Longer than you had. Her expression dropped, as if she was attending a funeral, serious, unlike a minute ago. 

You turned around, noticing her staring at you silently and opened your mouth, ready to say something more, but before you could the doorbell rang.

Her expression instantly shifted into a bright, forced smile.

"Oh! That must be my friends!" she clapped her hands together. "They're here to help me set the place up."

She burst out of her room with a squeal, yelling something incoherent as she sprinted down the hallway. A moment later, her arms were thrown around two of her friends, squeezing them tightly as if she hadn't seen them in years. 

Her reaction was strange, she begged and cried to know more about you, but the second it was her turn with the mic, she went all silent. How was that fair? 

The thought was still at the back of your mind, but you decided to brush it aside for tonight. Tonight, you were going to be seen, step out of your comfort zone. 

You stepped out of her room, and as soon as you did, Reze's attention faltered. Her eyes landed on you, and instantly she lit up again, spinning on her heel. "Oh, guys..." She sang, going behind you so suddenly you felt her presence at your back. Her hands came to rest on your shoulders, pushing you forward like a prize she was showing off.

"This is my new friend," she announced proudly, as though she had just revealed something she herself had created. "Be nice."

You barely had time to blink before she gave you a playful shove forward. The sudden attention made the back of your neck heat, but you managed to extend a hand politely.

"Especially you, Maki," she added, pointing a finger with a smug smile at one of the guys standing infront of you.

The boy raised his eyebrows and lifted his palms as if to defend himself. "What? I didn't even say anything." He said defensively, but the corners of his mouth twitched, unable to hide his laugh.

Reze rolled her eyes, "You fucking know 'what'." , waving him off before nudging you to introduce yourself. You muttered your name, shook a few hands, and quickly made your way to the living room.

As more people entered, the house was filled with music, chatter and laughter until dozens of people filled the rooms. 

You could tell just by the heaviness in the air, you really didn't miss partying that much, but thought it was nice once in a while. 

You went over to the kitchen, pouring yourself a drink when Reze stumbled in, her eyes half-lidded as she immediately clung onto you, wrapping her arms around your waist.

"How aaare yooou?" she said, her voice drowsy.

Your mouth fell open. "Already drunk? Oh, hell no, I can't let you beat me." You flicked the cap off a bottle of ouzo and started chugging from it until your throat burned and your mouth went completely numb, until vomit crawled up your throat and made you gag.

You slammed the bottle down on the counter, wiping your lips with the back of your hand as you winced from the taste. Reze and at least ten other people who'd gathered nearby were staring at you like you'd just performed a magic trick.

"Yeaaaah!" some guy cheered. A bunch of them gathered around you, clapping your back and laughing. You couldn't help but giggle at the attention, when suddenly Reze tugged your hand and dragged you out of the kitchen.

"Ooh! They're playing kiss or dare," she grinned, leading you straight into the living room. She sat down in the circle and patted the space beside her until you sat too.

Without hesitation, she raised her hand. "Alright, my turn." She leaned forward on all fours, grabbed the empty bottle in the center, and gave it a sharp spin.

"Wait, how do you even play this?" you whispered to the girl next to you.

She smiled at you. "So, basically you start off like normal, you spin the bottle-"

"AHHH!" Reze screeched before the girl could finish.

All eyes snapped to her.

You turned your head. "What-?"

Before you could get the word out, Reze lunged at you, crashing her lips against yours and pushing you flat onto the carpet.

When the kiss finally broke, you sat up, coughing and wide-eyed. "Reze, what the fuck?" you laughed through your shock.

She only grinned, brushing her hair back. "C'mon, girl, it's part of the game. Now it's your turn."

You rolled your eyes dramatically, catching the bottle with your hand. "You're actually crazy," you said, giving it a hard spin.

The bottle clinked as it spun across the floor, the room wobbling slightly from the alcohol already buzzing in your blood. You felt your grin stretch wider, almost stupid. When the bottle slowed, it pointed straight at a blonde guy sitting across from you.

You made eye contact for a second, then looked away, turning to the girl beside you. "Okay, so... what's the move? I kiss him, or is there, like, rules to this?"

She giggled, brushing her hair back. "If you don't wanna kiss, you take a truth instead. Easy."

You squinted, nodding. "Alright then. Hit me."

Before the blonde guy could say anything, another boy leaned forward eagerly. "Do you miss someone right now? And who is it?"

You snorted, unimpressed. "That's the question? Weak." You sighed. "But yeah, sure. I do."

Reze suddenly perked up like a spark had been lit under her. "Ooooh! Spill! Who?!" she squealed, her eyes locked on you.

You waved her off with a laugh. "That's one answer, no follow-ups. Who's next?"

Reze leaned into you, her voice dropping lower, teasing. "Come on, don't be boring. Tell me."

You blew out a dramatic sigh. "Fine. His name's Denji. But it's not like you know him anyway, so what's the point?"

The blonde guy locked his eyes on you across from you. "So you're not gonna kiss me, then?"

You tilted your head at him, flashing a grin. "Who said that?" You crawled across the circle without hesitation, your knees scraping the carpet, and pressed your lips against his. A few gasps and "oooohs" were heard as you deepened the kiss, enough to make people have a reaction.

When you pulled back, the smile was still on your face as you returned to your spot like nothing happened.

You turned toward Reze, expecting her to tease you, but her face was blank for a moment, her smile gone. Her eyes drifted past you, unfocused, like she was just zoning out.

You frowned and nudged her shoulder. "Hey. You good?"

She blinked and looked at you. "Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Just spaced out for a sec." She sighed. "I had too much to drink." She said as she put a hand on her forehead.

You told yourself not to overthink it. Everyone gets loopy at parties.

The game dragged on, and the longer it lasted, the heavier the air became. Literally.

Your chest felt tight.

You slipped your coat on, deciding to step outside for a cigarette and some air.

Reze noticed immediately. "Nooo, where are you going?" she whined, tilting her head up at you like a cat refusing to be ignored.

You looked down at her. "Relax. Just going for a smoke. Want one?"

She shook her head politely. "I don't smoke." She shook some dice in her hands as she tossed them back onto the table. "Go on, I'll catch up."

You left the door cracked open, letting the thick, sweaty heat of the room flow out behind you.

The cold air was a blessing.

Music played faintly from inside, laughter as the background noise you'd heard too many times before. There were bodies scattered across couches and floors, out cold. 

On the balcony, a guy was passed out in nothing but a jumper and a Christmas hat, slouched down. You pulled his jacket off the chair, draping it over him before lighting your cigarette. Your hands melted as the flame arose, smoke escaping into the sharp night air.

It was November. The emd of the millennium was near, heavy with false promises. Everyone kept saying it mattered. Did it?

Did anything matter?

You hated the thought, hated how nihilistic it sounded, but life had made you this way.

Even now, with friends around you, kind of, with warmth and laughter waiting inside, your chest was still emtpy.

What was missing? Was it Denji? Was he really the missing piece? Or just another trick of your mind, dangling a piece of happiness you'd never reach?

You buried your face in your hands, blowing warmth into your palms with a sigh.

"Hey."

Reze's voice broke the silence. She slipped onto the balcony, arms crossed around herself, her cheeks already flushed from the cold.

You turned, a small smile appearing on your lips. "Look who finally showed up." You straightened and flicked ash over the railing. "Seriously, you don't have to freeze out here with me. Non-smokers usually hate this."

"Shut up," she muttered, bumping her shoulder against yours before leaning on the railing beside you. The two of you stood close, shoulders touching, watching the dark night sky.

The silence around you was comfortable. It was rare to find someone that you feel safe to share moments like this with. 

"I'm Russian." Her voice broke the silence.

You raised a brow. "Really? Wouldn't have guessed." You exhaled smoke.

"It's also my first year in school," she added, her eyes lowered. "Ever."

That caught you off guard. "What do you mean?"

She raised her face again as it grew redder from the cold, or maybe from what she was saying. "I told you once. Public Safety doesn't exactly give you the luxury of a normal life." Her voice hardened. "They already tried to kill me. Didn't work. So here I am."

You didn't know what to say. "I... wasn't expecting that." You lit another cigarette. "But I get it. They tried with me too. More than once. Guess that makes two of us."

You finished your cigarette and gestured to go back inside. Rese skipped on her way in.

"Thanks for being honest with me."

Chapter Text

You ended up getting wasted, no surprise there.

You kept telling yourself you weren't that drunk, that you were fine, but deep down you knew it wasn't true. You laughed it off every time someone mentioned it, even though your head was already spinning. At some point everything just went black.

They always say not to drink on an empty stomach. Especially not all at once.

When you finally woke up, your body was sticky with sweat, and your face felt heavy with smudged makeup. Your mascara had run down your cheeks, your lipstick was gone, and your skin felt gross. 

You groaned, pushing yourself upright.

The sunlight pained your eyes, blinding you until they slowly adjusted. Reze's house was a mess. Cups on the floor, bottles everywhere, the smell of alcohol clinging to the air. Most of the people had already left, but a few guys were still passed out shirtless on the couch and the floor, their snoring filling the silence.

You dragged yourself to the bathroom. The mirror didn't do you any favors. You winced at your reflection, leaning closer as if maybe you'd look better from another angle. You didn't. With a sigh, you started wiping the makeup off your face, watching as the cotton pads turned black.

When you were done, you didn't bother trying to fix yourself up. You just left the bathroom, grabbed your things, and slipped out of the house quietly.

The afternoon stretched out ahead of you. At least it was the weekend, you thought. No classes, no work. Just time to try and recover.

Back at your place, the first thing you did was head into the kitchen. You popped an aspirin into your mouth, washing it down with a full glass of water. You hoped it would take the edge off the pounding in your head. 

Dragging yourself to your room, you began pulling off your clothes piece by piece, too tired to care where they landed.

On your way to the bathroom, you caught sight of yourself in the hallway mirror. You stopped. For some reason, you couldn't help but stare. Your hair was messy, your eyes a little bloodshot, but you twirled anyway, running your hands down your body, laughing softly at yourself in disbelief.

Finally, you pushed the bathroom door open and stepped inside. You turned on the shower, letting the water heat up before stepping in. The hot water poured over you, washing away the sweat, the makeup, and the heaviness from last night. You closed your eyes, letting yourself relax for the first time all day.

You opened your eyes and in the corner of your eye, and you saw sillouhette of a person standing in your bathroom.

You froze. Frantically wiping your eyes to double check. 

"Whoever the fuck is out there, show yourself."

You were ready to do whatever it took.

The man laughed, an oddly familiar laugh.

"Dramatic as always."

You froze, your body reacting before your brain could catch up. Your fight or flight mode kicked in and you braced yourself to defend against whoever had broken into your home. 

The footsteps grew louder, closer, until the shadow appeared closer behind the shower curtain.

It suddenly yanked open.

"Huh?!" You gasped, feeling the cold air rush over your bare skin as you scrambled to cover yourself.

"I told you, you can't run from me."

Yoshida's sharp eyes met yours, and you let out a scream.

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE!" 

You screamed, though you instantly realized how ridiculous that sounded, considering he worked for Public Safety.

You clenched your fists, and a white aura flared around you. A black hole tore open beneath Yoshida's feet, your last desperate attempt to fight back, but he dodged easily, landing just ahead of it.

He glanced back at the swirling void and chuckled.

"Still haven't figured out how your devil powers work?" He turned to face you again. "And yet you want to roam freely." 

You gritted your teeth, the humiliation making you grow hot.

"Can you at least get out of the fucking bathroom until I'm finished?"

He crossed his arms, his expression calm.

"Nope. This is your punishment for trying to run away from me."

You groaned, covering your face in frustration. After a long, tense silence with only the noise from the shower circling the room, you sighed desperately.

"Am I ever going to get away from you...?" 

When you were finally done, you stomped out of the bathroom, clutching your bathrobe tightly around you, staring at Yoshida with a frown on your face.

"Are you, like, in love with me or something?"

You made your way to your room, slamming the door, or at least trying to, until Yoshida's hand stopped it mid-swing.

"You're so full of yourself, it's infuriating," he said flatly.

You snatched a pair of underwear from the drawer and shot him a glare, your silent signal for him to turn around. He sighed but obeyed, facing the wall while you changed.

"Really?" you said, struggling to tug a shirt over your head. "Have I finally managed to make you mad for once?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself," he replied, his voice monotone as ever.

Your stomach growled, snapping you out of your thoughts. With a groan, you pushed past him and headed to the kitchen. 

Scrambled eggs were one of the few things you could actually make. Without burning the whole building down. On a good day. 

Yoshida followed and dropped onto a stool in front of the counter, resting his elbows on the surface.

"Any for me?" he asked innocently. 

"No." you answered coldly, cracking another egg into the pan.

He puckered his lips in fake disappointment. "Awh, too bad. I was just about to mention something that happened to Denji the other day..." He leaned his chin into his hand.

You didn't even glance his way. "Save it. I don't care." you muttered, eyes fixed on the stove.

Yoshida tilted his head slightly, his monotone smile returning to his lips. "Hm? The love story didn't have a happy ending after all, huh?" 

You exhaled slowly, shutting your eyes for a few seconds just so you wouldn't give in to the urge of throwing the hot eggs and oil in Yoshida's face. Not that it would've mattered, he'd just dodge them anyway.

"Whatever," you muttered, stirring your plate. "Make yourself at home, I guess."

Yoshida gave a faint smile and stood up, plopping himself onto the sofa and stretching like he owned the place. "Don't worry. I already am."

"At least tell me you're gonna split the bills," you said, talking around a mouthful of food as you sat onto the counter. "Money's tight right now."

"I already spoke with my supervisors," he said, his eyes fixated on the turned-off TV. "They agreed to cover that, considering... your situation."

Your head snapped up. "Wait, seriously?" You said, still having food in your mouth.

He nodded. "Yeah. But you should still get a job. I won't be around forever."

"Thank God." you whispered under your breath.

After drying your hair and throwing on a casual outfit, you grabbed your coat from the hanger and headed for the door. That's when you remembered Yoshida, and how he'd never let you go anywhere alone.

You turned the knob as quietly as possible, pulling the door open ever so slightly. Yoshida was still on the couch, reading a newspaper, completely facing the other way.

"Where are we going?" he asked calmly, his eyes never leaving the paper.

You groaned, throwing your coat onto the floor. "Ugh. Nowhere."

"Bummer."

You stomped back to your room and locked the door behind you. You needed a plan, something that would get you to Reze's place without Yoshida noticing. She'd asked for help with math the other day, and honestly, you were dying for a change of scenery anyway.

You paced back and forth, running through every possible escape route in your head. From the faint sound of the TV outside, it seemed like Yoshida was distracted enough, for now.

You lit a cigarette by the window, careful to blow the smoke outside so you wouldn't get another complaint from the neighbors.

You tapped your foot, thinking. Then it hit you.

The window.

It wasn't exactly a short drop, but if you were careful, you could manage it.

You flicked the cigarette out the window, watching the tiny ember disappear into the night before you rolled up your sleeves.

"Alright," you whispered to yourself, gripping the frame. "No big deal. Just a casual escape from my own apartment."

You swung one leg over the window, the cold air immediately biting your skin. The alley below wasn't that far, two floors, maybe. Manageable if you didn't break your neck on the way down.

You reached for the drainpipe running alongside the building and gave it a little tug. It made a sound but seemed steady. Good enough.

The first few steps down were easy. The metal was cold under your hands, and every little sound felt ten times louder than it should have been. You were lucky it was early in the morning and there weren't any people around to see you do this stunt. You didn't need any attention on you at the moment. 

You kept glancing back at your window, expecting Yoshida's face to appear with a disappointed frown.  

Thankfully, he didn't notice right away. You felt proud for outsmarting him.

By the time your feet touched the ground, adrenaline had completely kicked in. You grinned to yourself, free at last.

You brushed off your hands, straightened your coat and started walking down the street. The city was quiet, just a few distant car horns and the faint buzz of streetlights.

Reze's place wasn't too far. You pulled your old flip-phone from your pocket and scrolled through your messages until her name appeared.

coming over :p

To: reze

You hit send and shoved it back into your pocket, picking up your pace, half from the cold air biting at your skin, half from the anxiety twisting in your chest.

It was funny, in a cruel sort of way, how Yoshida acted like a parent toward you, the overbearing type, always listening, always watching.

Except your parent isn't supposed to kiss you and not let you go anywhere, or look at you like you were both a problem and a possession. Toxic was an understatement, but you'd learned long ago that naming something didn't make it easier to fix. What could you really do about it?

You tried not to think about the last thing he said before you walked out. About Denji. You'd cut him off too quickly, your pride taking over like it always did. You cursed yourself for it.

Because the truth was, you missed Denji. More than you wanted to admit. You missed the chaos that came with him, the stupid jokes, the way he'd look at you like you weren't as broken as you felt. You missed the noise he brought into your life, even if it made you want to scream sometimes. Without him, everything felt quiet.

You told yourself you ended things because you had self-worth, because you deserved better. And maybe you did. But the more time had passed, your chest ached with that ugly kind of doubt that never goes away.

Were you overreacting? Probably. But it still felt real, your anger towards him.

Or maybe you were just self-sabotaging. You were good at that. 

You finally reached Reze's building. You rang the doorbell cautiously, your breath visible in the crisp morning air. A full minute passed, enough time for you to start second-guessing if she was even home, before the door opened.

"Hey–" you started, but stopped mid-word.

Because the person standing at the door was not Reze. It was some half-naked guy. Hair messy and wearing nothing but low-slung sweatpants.

Neither of you moved.

"Why are you looking at me like I'm the one naked?" you said, lookinh him up and down.

He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck and yawning. "What do you want?"

"Is Reze home?" you asked, leaning slightly to peek behind him.

He glanced over his shoulder. "Hm. Should be around here somewhere." he muttered, stepping aside to let you in.

You hesitated for a moment, the place smelled faintly of alcohol, perfume, and something burnt.

The place looked like a battlefield. Bottles, cups, and food were scattered everywhere. A sticky puddle shined on the floor, and you weren't sure if it was puke or blood. Hopefully not the second one.

"She's in the shower, I think." the guy said, gesturing toward the hallway with his thumb.

You nodded as he disappeared into another room, leaving you alone in the wreckage.

You sighed and, out of sheer restlessness, started cleaning. Picking up empty cans, straightening toppled chairs, at least to help out Reze even a little bit. The kitchen alone looked like it had survived a hurricane, and by the time you were done, your hands were sticky and you felt your headache return. 

You leaned against the counter, staring blankly out the window, the morning light shined through the blinds. For a brief second, you wondered how your life had managed to spiral into this. It was hard not thinking about life when you were alone, it's the main reason you risked your life to come all the way here. You needed a distraction. 

Your fingers slipped into your hair as you sighed, shoulders heavy.

You got pulled out of your thoughts as you stumbled, falling on the floor as something or someone made impact with you.

You looked up to see two strangers, a guy and a girl, running around the counters chasing eachother.

"The fuck—" you started, raising your head.

Judging by his expression, and well, everything else, he seemed furious, his veins popping out of his forehead ready to burst. "Give me the xan!" he yelled, his raw tone startling you. 

The girl was laughing hysterically, clearly high out of her mind. She dodged him, clutching a small packet in her hand.

They were too fast for two people who could barely stand straight. The guy jumped onto the counter and lunged at her, tackling her mid-run.

Your instinct took over.

"Hey! Hey, calm down!" You grabbed the girl's arm, trying to pry them apart. She squealed and the guy cursed at her. 

You finally managed to yank the girl free and pushed her away behind you.

"What are you still doing here? It's nine in the fucking morning. Don't you have a home or something?" you stood infront of him, slightly expecting him to pull a knife from mid-air.

He glared at you, which scared you more than it should've. "That bitch isn't giving me something that belongs to me." He pointed at the girl.

You cut him off sharply. "Handle your business outside or I'll call the cops."

You started making your way toward the drawer, not that you planned to use anything, but it was comforting knowing there might be a knife nearby, just in case he was a devil or something. Not sure how a knife would help, though.

He still didn't call down, but eventually, he grabbed the girl by the arm and dragged her toward the door. She was still laughing, tripping over herself as they vanished outside, slamming the door behind them.

You exhaled shakily, grateful to still be alive. That was a close call.

You began picking up the things they'd knocked off the counter, random objects, wrappers,  a lighter you accidentally put in your pocket and a small purse that had fallen open.

You crouched down and started gathering the thihgs, wallet, keys, lipstick, some receipts. Nothing weird. 

Something caught your eye, though. A polaroid photo that had slipped out, of someone familiar.

It was Reze. On the picture. She had on a bikini and was at the beach as it seemed, her hair tied in her signature ponytaila and the sunset casting a beautiful golden glow. She looked happy, freer than you'd ever seen her.

You turned it over, meaning to put it back, but something thin was tucked behind it. A folded note.

You hesitated, glancing around to check if someone was in the room with you.

"I will always love you."

It wasn't signed.

"What are you doing?"

You froze, dreading to look up. Every nerve in your body went still.

Reze stood over you, a towel draping over her shoulders and her damp hair clinging to her face. Her mascara smudged under her eyes, but she still looked unreal.

You jumped to your feet, holding the purse awkwardly. "Shit, this looks bad, but I swear I can explain. Two people, a guy and a girl, were fighting, and one of them accidentally–"

Reze chuckled, cutting you off. "Ren and Aiko." She took the purse from your hands. "Druggies who shouldn't be together," she muttered, rolling her eyes. "I'll personally file a restraining order for them." 

You blinked, still trying to catch up.

"No, seriously. I didn't go through your stuff, they knocked everything off the counter. There's even water spilled, see?" You pointed at the damp spot on the carpet.

Reze raised an eyebrow. "Girl, I believe you. Calm down."

She stepped closer, resting her hands on your shoulders and giving them a shake. "You're so dramatic."

You let out a shaky laugh, rubbing your forehead. "Thank you. I swear, I didn't take anything,"

"STOOOP," she groaned dramatically, still shaking you. "I know. It's fine."

She turned away, waving her hand dismissively as she headed toward the hallway. "Forget about it. Come to my room. We'll order something, my treat. You eaten?"

You smiled faintly, shaking your head. You had eaten earlier, but... free food was free food. And besides, a little company didn't sound so bad, you got what you came there for.

Chapter Text

The rain fell hard on your skin. The smell of it on grass gave you a weirdly nostalgic feeling you could never explain, nor did you dive deep into it.

Which was strange, because you always felt things too personal. Everything hit a little too close and a little too heavy. But no matter how much you felt and hurt, it still didn't change anything.

Some things though, you couldn't escape from. Or forgive yourself for.

One of those things was Yuto's death.

You stood in front of his grave, the rain symbolically falling on the dirt as a few small flowers tried to rise from the soaked ground. Their petals trembled under the water, but they still stood, small, stubborn and alive. 

You smiled softly, painfully, before you broke. You pressed your lips together and tried to hold it in, but your breath came out uneven and shaky. You wiped your cheeks roughly, like that would stop the ache. You squatted down, your long skirt darkening in the mud and covered your face with your hands.

It wasn't loud crying. Just small, quiet sobs that made your shoulders twitch. 

"I'm getting wet."

Oh, and Yoshida was there. How could you forget?

You turned your head slowly, looking at him through the blur of tears and mascara. Your throat burned and your blood boiled.

He quickly shut up and raised his hands, like he didn't want to interrupt, but he knew he already had. The rain had flattened his hair, his jacket sticking to him and water dripping down his face as he looked at you with those emtpy eyes. 

"Then go the fuck home."

꩜ ———————————— ꩜

Tossing the bag onto your couch, you plopped down beside it and lay there, releasing all tension in your body and your eyes. You just wanted a few seconds of peace.

"What's up?"

Yoshida plopped down beside you, almost really throwing himself on you. It was as if he had apsolutely zero empathy for you, he never dared to show any emotion, except for anger once or twice, maybe.

You let out a sigh, disregarding him while you savored those last few seconds of rest he wouldn't delight in pestering you further.

You told him you were on your period and to leave you alone and went to your room, locking the door behind you.

You wanted peace, even for a little while. You had to escape, it had become a habit by now.

You opened the window and the cold air seeped in, making your hands cold enough for it to sting. Of course, you had forgotten your coat in the living room.

You silently opened the door and walked up to the hanger as quietly as possible, grabbing it and trying not to make a sound even though you knew Yoshida would hear you.

"Where to now?"

There it was.

You sighed, speed-walking to your room. "Nowhere. I'm cold."

You were just about to shut the door. "Yeah? You're not gonna sneak out again?" He said, folding his newspaper and laying his head back on the couch.

You froze. He wasn't supposed to know that.

You panicked, but then reminded yourself he wasn't your parent so he couldn't treat you like a child.

But he was worse in this situation. He was like a parent that had their eyes on you 24/7, following you everywhere and knowing your every exact move as if you had a camera and a tracker glued to you.

"I cannot fucking well live in my own damn house, Yoshida?! I was just at my brother's grave, will you give me a break." You yelled at him and slammed the door shut.

You plopped down on your bed and pulled out a cigarette from your pocket, feeling your eyes start to water. You didn't give a shit if you got kicked out, you'd rather be homeless than live with Yoshida. At least then you wouldn't be alone with him.

You began to cry silently, gripping your hair in frustration and almost burning yourself with the cigarette. You felt you were hallucinating, hearing whistles from your room.

You ignored it, thinking it was from the television or from outside, but it sounded suspiciously near, as if someone was right next to you.

It got harder to ignore after it continued and you heard a knocking on your window.

You froze, your head turning slowly. Your eyes locked on the dim, rain-speckled glass, and for a second, you thought your mind was playing tricks on you.

But it wasn't.

A face suddenly appeared in the window, and your heart jumped straight to your throat. You screamed, stumbling off the bed with a dull thud, barely catching yourself on the nightstand.

"What the fuck?!"

"Didn't know you hated me that much."

You blinked at the muffled voice outside. It was no other than Denji peeking through the window, struggling to keep himself up.

You stood up slowly, finding him clinging to the sill, his arms trembling slightly as he tried not to fall. Your heart was pounding so fast it almost hurt. You half-considered pinching yourself to make sure this wasn't a dream.

"Well, you know, it's not every day someone comes up to my window like a fucking creep." you muttered, rubbing your eyes. "Are you insane? What if I was naked or something?"

Denji shifted his arms for balance, hanging there like it was nothing.

He really was strong. Too strong. And, damn it, he looked so fucking hot doing it.

"Nothing I haven't seen already," he said with that smug grin, making your cheeks flush instantly. "Gonna let me in, or what?"

"You're so unserious." You covered your face with your hand, pretending you were disappointed instead of flustered.

"What? It's hard not to be when I'm freezing out here," he whined dramatically, wiggling his arms against the frame. "You gonna let your beloved guest fall to his tragic death?"

"You're not my beloved anything," you said, crossing your arms. "And since when could you die from falling? Or, anything, for that matter."

"There's a lot of things you don't know about me." He tilted his head sideways.

Denji stood with his arms crossed over the edge, staring into your eyes innocently, as if it was a normal day between you, and as if he wasn't dangling out of a window. You envied him for it. For his confidence and ability to make any situation lighter without thinking twice.

You stared at him piercingly, weighing your options, before you opened the window all the way, watching him take your hand and shift his body over the sill as you pulled him in. "Thanks."

He was so silly. You wouldn't admit it, but deep down you were so glad he showed up, your heart finally felt warm again.

You shook your head annoyingly, trying to contain your laughter. "Yeah, yeah, just be quiet."

"Yesss." Denji said in a quieted happiness and jumped from the window down, making a pretty loud thud.

You didn't want to abandon your feelings and forgive him so quickly, but a part of you desperately wanted to hear him out.

His eyes flicked over to your room as soon as he got in, scanning it in its entirety. "This place looks just like last time. I got déjà vu." He put his hands on his waist like an old man as he looked around. "You still keep that ugly lamp, huh?"

"It's not ugly, it's vintage," you said, sitting down on the bed.

"Yeah, vintage ugly," he chuckled.

You shook your head and made your way towards your nightstand, popping an aspirin into your mouth and washing it down with water.

Denji walked over to your mirror and started checking himself out, tilting his head from side to side. He ran his fingers through his hair, somehow making it look even messier than before.

"Is that what you came here to do?" You turned your head around to face him. "You look like you got electrocuted."

"More or less." He coughed out a laugh at himself, making you freak out instantly. "Shhh!" you said in urgency.

Denji immediately went silent and stared at you like you were crazy. "What?" he whispered.

"He's still here." You pointed to the door. "I don't want to be a further bother to you. Look, Denji. We can talk some other time, now is not a good-"

He threw his jacket onto your bed and jumped on it, making it creak loudly. "Nah. I'm not going anywhere. Stop dragging it." He put his hands behind his head and enjoyed the comfort of your bed.

You turned around and looked at him bewilderedly. "I'm dragging it?" You got up, frustrated. "I'm the one that's fucking dragging it?" You pointed a finger at him.

He noticed you starting to back away and get genuinely mad, which made him stand up and slowly walk toward you, as if he were chasing a kitten. "Whoa, hey-"

"You never answered my text. You never called to check up on me. You never fucking cared about me." You started to tear up again, scrunching your face to keep the tears from coming out. He gently took your finger you so angrily pointed at him and intertwined your hand with his.

"Hey," he said softly, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, "that's not true. I just... didn't know what to do. Didn't wanna mess things up worse."

He slowly put his hand on your back and brought you closer to him, making you collide your head with his chest. "Please, don't push me away." He said softly.

You couldn't take it anymore and burst out in tears as he gently pet your head. He held you so softly you couldn't think about anything else but him and the moment right there. 

You sniffled and straightened up slowly to face him.

You couldn't stop looking at his eyes. You almost completely forgot what you were crying about looking into them.

"He's still here, Denji. I don't know what to fucking do." You bit your thumb as you struggled to speak through your tears.

Denji looked at you worried and confused. "Yoshida?" He took your thumb out of your mouth.

You nodded.

"Man, fuck that gay dude." Denji said confidently, raising his hand. "Don't think I couldn't take him in a fight. 'Cause I can."

You sighed in disbelief at what you were hearing. It kind of made you giggle, though.

"Denji, no. This is serious." You turned your head toward your door and grabbed your forehead. "I just... I can't take it anymore. I'm barely making it as-is with the last of my parents' money and I've got bigger problems to think about than him, and I-I just can't-"

You felt a firm hand on your shoulder, fingers digging in just enough to send a jolt through your body. Before your brain could catch up, you were twisted around, and Denji's mouth crashed against yours in a kiss.

Your heart slammed, pounding wildly in your chest. Part of you screamed to shove him off, to slap that stupid, needy look off his face and scream until your lungs burned. You needed this, needed him, like air after drowning.

His tongue pushed past your lips without hesitation, hot and slick, twisting with yours in a messy urgency. You surrendered to it, your body going soft as you fisted the front of his shirt, yanking him closer until not even a whisper of space separated you.

His chest pressed flush against yours, hard, and you could feel the rapid beating of his heart mirroring your own.

Denji whimpered into your mouth, a soft, broken sound that vibrated against your tongue. It was pathetic and perfect, lighting a fire in your stomach. 

Your hands roamed up, intertwining into his messy hair, nails scratching lightly over his scalp. He shivered under your touch, another needy whine escaping him, and fuck, it nearly undid you right there, your pulse racing so fast you thought it might shatter your ribs.

You backed up step by step, pulling him with you until the edge of the bed hit the back of your knees. 

You sank down onto the mattress, never breaking the kiss, your legs parting instinctively to draw him in closer. He followed, looming over you, feeling his body heat radiating. 

Your free hand slid down his side, gripping his hip hard enough to bruise, urging him to press against you.

Finally, he tore his mouth away, a glistening strand of saliva stretching between your lips. His breaths came in ragged gasps, his chest rising and falling like he'd run a marathon. His eyes were dilated and darted from yours to your parted mouth and back again. Sweat made his hair stick to his forehead and his face flushed a deep crimson that made him look even more fuckable.

You leaned back on your elbows, looking up at him with heavy-lidded eyes. You watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed hard.

Slowly, your eyes dragged down his body, over the hard lines of his shoulders, the way his shirt clung to his sweat-dampened skin, lower still to where his pants strained against the thick bulge of his cock. It twitched under you, and you licked your lips, tasting it already.

"Oh god, how I've missed you." you said, throwing your bead back. The fabric of his shirt was warm from his body, and you inhaled deeply, filling your lungs with his scent, musky, aroused, all Denji. Your hands slid up his thighs, thumbs brushing teasingly close to that painful length, feeling the heat radiating through his pants.

He exhaled shakily, one hand coming up to tangle in your hair, holding you there as if afraid you'd vanish. "You have no idea." he said, his voice rough with need. "Been thinking about this, about you, every fucking night. Your mouth, your hands... fuck, I need to feel you again."

His words were enought to make you wet and want to scream. You pushed him upright as you sat on the edge of the bed, looking up at him with innocent eyes.

You pressed your lips to his abdomen through the shirt, kissing and nipping at the fabric while your fingers worked at his belt buckle. The metal clinked softly, and you tugged it open, the sound obscene in the quiet room. 

Denji's hips jerked forward involuntarily, his cock straining harder against the zipper, begging for release. You palmed him through the denim, squeezing the thick shaft, and he let out a strangled moan, his grip in your hair tightening.

"Yeah, just like that," he breathed, rocking into your hand. You could feel every inch of him, hot, hard, pulsing. Your own arousal soaked through your panties, a slick heat building between your thighs as you imagined him splitting you open, filling you until you screamed.

He was still as shy as ever, behind his nasty words came a flushed, embarrased face that was so cute and memorable, so Denji-like.

You unzipped him slowly, savoring the way his breath hitched, and freed his cock from the confines of his boxers. It sprang out, heavy and veined, the tip already glistening with pre-cum. 

Your mouth watered at the sight, and you wrapped your fingers around the base, stroking him firmly from root to tip. Denji's head fell back, a low groan ripping from his throat as his hips bucked into your grip.

"Please," he whimpered, eyes squeezing shut. "Don't stop. Touch me more, fuck, I want your mouth on me."

You obliged, leaning in to drag your tongue along the underside of his length, tasting the salty bead of pre-cum. 

He shuddered violently, his free hand clutching into a fist. You swirled your tongue around the head, sucking lightly, and his whines turned into desperate pleas, his body trembling above you.

Three sharp knocks echoed from the door, shattering the moment.

You both froze, his cock still throbbing in your fist. The sound cut through the air like a knife, like reality crashing back in.

"Shit, shit, shit!" you hissed, yanking your hand away and scrambling off the bed, your legs shaky from the interrupted pleasure. 

Your heart hammered with fear and frustration, your pulse echoing in your ears.

Denji turned around and sat back down, his cock still hard and pulsing, confusion painting his flushed face. He tucked himself back into his pants with a wince, eyes fixed on you. "Why are you so afraid of him?' He tilted his head, voice casual, like the world hadn't just ended for you. "It's not a big deal."

"You don't get it, Denji-" You spun towards him. The knocks came again, more insistent, and dread twisted in your gut.

"I do get it," he said, standing up again but not moving closer, his expression shifting to worry. 'You think he wasn't like this with me? Well, not to this extent, but still. "

"Then what the fuck am I supposed to do, Denji?! What are my options?"

Another slam. The doorknob twisted violently.

Your heartbeat synchronized with the creaking wood. He'll see you. He'll see Denji. He'll ruin everything all over again. 

You exhaled slowly and reached out, not toward the door, but toward the fabric of perception itself. The air shimmered faintly, rippling through.

Outside, Yoshida froze mid-kick. His hand hovered in the air, brow furrowing. For a second, he seemed to forget why he was there at all.

Denji blinked, glancing toward the door. "...Did he just stop?"

"Not exactly," you murmured. Your voice came out hollow, as if from a few steps behind yourself. "He's forgetting."

You could feel it, your power crawling through Yoshida's mind, gently erasing your presence from his immediate memory. But it wasn't clean. It never was. The Unknown Devil didn't grant control, it demanded surrender.

A whisper slid across your thoughts: Who are you hiding from, again?

You blinked hard, chest tightening. "Denji," you whispered, clutching your temples. "Don't let me disappear, okay?"

He frowned. "Disappear? You're right here." He squeezed your wrist.

Outside, Yoshida lowered his hand. His eyes darted around, uncertain. "...Why was I-" He shook his head. "Whatever." You heard his footsteps become quieter as he walked away from your room, leaving behind a silence that was too loud to trust.

You slumped back against the wall. Reality settled again, but it felt off, like someone had rearranged the pieces while you weren't looking.

Denji crouched beside you, searching your face. "You okay?"

You met his eyes, unsure whether he was really seeing you or just the idea of you. "I don't know," you said quietly. "Sometimes I think I'm not supposed to exist."

He scratched his head, frowning in that simple, sincere way of his. "Then I'll just keep reminding you you do. Even if I gotta do it every five minutes."

You managed a shaky smile. "That's a lot of reminders."

"Guess I'll be busy." He shrugged. "We're not stayin' here, though. If he comes back with backup, we're screwed."

You nodded, still catching your breath from the mental strain. Your room felt warped, your brain was foggy. You needed air. 

Denji was already cracking open the window.

Cold wind and the sound of pouring rain rushed inside.

"Great," Denji muttered, staring at the storm outside. "Figures."

He swung one leg over the window sill and looked back at you. "C'mon."

Denji's hand reached out to you.

"Hey. I'm right here."

That was enough.

You climbed out, gripping his hand as you both dropped into the wet cement below. The shock of cold water splashing up your legs made your senses snap into clarity.

"Where are we even going?" you asked, breath misting in the air.

Denji squeezed your hand and tugged you forward, breaking into a run through the dark, rain-soaked street.

"Away."

You couldn't help a breathless laugh as the two of you sprinted, shoes slapping through puddles, rain drenching your hair and clothes within seconds. 

Every street lamp flickered in the storm, your shadow and Denji's stretching and merging as you ran side by side.

Your lungs burned. Water streamed down your face, and the world blurred into streaks of color and sound, but it was real. So painfully real.

Finally, in the cover of a small alley, Denji slowed, leaning against a brick wall, breathing heavily.

"Okay-" he gasped, brushing wet hair from his eyes, "-I felt too many things too quickly, even I need a break."

You laughed again, but the sound cracked. You pressed a hand to your chest, breathing hard.

"Denji... what if Yoshida remembers? What if I'm losing control of my-"

He stepped closer, rain dripping from his hair.

"Stop thinkin' about what you might forget." He tapped a finger against your forehead. "Think about what's right here. Right now."

The rain softened around you, or maybe everything just felt quieter because of how close he was now. 

His shirt clung to him, water trailing down his jaw, his lips slightly parted as he caught his breath.

You realized his hand was still holding yours. Tight.

"Denji-"

He didn't let you finish.

He leaned in, closing the distance with the kind of recklessness only Denji could have, messy, urgent, no hesitation. His lips crashed into yours, tasting like rain and adrenaline. His hand slid to the back of your neck, pulling you closer as if the world might erase you if he let go.

You kissed him back, fingers curling into his soaked shirt, grounding yourself in the heat of him, the realness of his body against yours. 

For the first time in what felt like ages, there was no illusion. No confusion. No fractured futures.

Just him.

You finally broke apart, foreheads touching.

"If your powers ever make everyone forget you... I won't." His thumb brushed your cheek. "I'll remember you even if it kills me."

You didn't know if you were stepping into your own grave by doing this, but right now, under the rain, his kiss felt like the closest thing to reality.

And you held onto it like your life depended on it.

Chapter Text

"Hello?"

Your voice didn't echo. It just slipped away, swallowed whole by the dark, like the air itself refused to carry sound.

You took a step forward. The ground didn't move exactly, but it shifted, adjusting beneath you, not welcoming, just making space.

A cold breath brushed the back of your neck.

You could sense someone was there.

You froze, breath catching in your throat.

A figure appeared as you walked forward, it was small, hunched over, its shoulders trembling. You shouldn't have been able to see it. There was no light there. But somehow, you did.

"...Denji?"

You walked closer, slow and careful. The darkness seemed to retreat just enough to let you keep it in sight, not wanting to show but unable to stop you from seeing.

"Who's there?" you whispered. "What's going on?"

Your heartbeat rapidly increased, not in your chest, but behind your eyes, inside your skull. The sound didn't echo out into the space. The dark had stolen that, too.

"Denji," you said again, barely above a breath.

It twitched. The faint scrape of skin on fabric cracked through the silence like a whisper in your ear.

You stiffened. "Hey," you said, forcing yourself to be calm. "It's me."

Slowly, its head lifted.

The darkness clung to it, like it didn't want to let go. You were finally able to see its face. Its eyes were stretched too wide. Mouth parted, caught mid-breath.

Something flickered across its expression, recognition, maybe pain.

When it spoke, the sound didn't come from where it sat. It came from behind your ear.

You spun around only to find nothing. Its breathing hitched, like it was relearning how.

Its head snapped up. Its voice tore through the air, it was too loud, coming from everywhere but his mouth.

"Who are you? Get the hell away from me!"

You flinched. Not from the volume, but from the fear in his voice.

"Denji, it's me," you said, stepping closer even though your instincts screamed don't. "It's okay, you're-"

He stumbled back, palms scraping the invisible floor. Just as suddenly, the panic drained from his face.

What replaced it wasn't calm. It was nothing.

His lips barely moved, but the words found you anyway, soft, close, brushing right against your ear.

"If you keep seeing me, I'll die."

Your eyes shot open as you choked on your own spit.

You shot upright, clutching your chest, trying to calm your heartbeat before you could even process anything else.

"What the fuck... what the fuck was that...?" you whispered, as if saying something out loud would prove you were still yourself.

You weren't sure if that was a vision or something worse, but you were definitely hoping it was just a nightmare.

Lifting your head, you realized you were on your couch. In your apartment.

You had zero clue how you got back home. The last thing you remembered was sitting on a wet bench with Denji, your head resting on his shoulder while he shyly tried to rest on yours.

Denji.

He was your first thought when you woke up and the last one before you fell asleep. No matter how much you tried to ignore it, it was the truth, and you were tired of running from it.

You got up and headed to the bathroom, half-expecting Yoshida to jump out of a shadow and beat your ass for disappearing again.

You stood in front of the mirror. Your eyes were bloodshot, your skin was paler, almost ghost-like.

You touched your cheek. Your skin felt softer than usual. Weirdly soft. Was this tied to your devil side?

You were the Unknown Devil fiend, after all. Maybe the whole point was to be unreadable. To be hidden.

You left the bathroom, and that's when it hit you Yoshida wasn't home. At your home, that is.

A weird, uneasy feeling crept in as you checked every room, only to find... nothing. You weren't used to being alone, not anymore, but you weren't exactly complaining either.

You were passing through the living room when something in the corner caught your eye.

A pale, almost translucent hand with long old nails reached out and switched on the TV.

You froze, unable to take your eyes off the screen.

"It is currently 11° Celsius outside with light rain expected through the evening. Winds reaching-"

You stepped closer, drawn to the screen, unable to look away.

"And now, breaking news!"

The screen cut to shaky surveillance camera footage, the streetlights flickering, rain pouring down, people screaming as a massive devil tore through the city. A grotesque, centipede-looking thing with too many legs to count and a mouth that kept splitting into more mouths.

Unexpectedly, you appeared on screen.

You stepped into the frame like a glitch, not walking into it, but barely showing up into existence, as if the camera had skipped a second of reality and you simply appeared there.

People cheered at the sight of you, or rather their voices trembled with confusion and fear?

The devil lunged toward you, and instead of dodging, you just stared at it, not moving an inch. The space around you warped, like the air folded inward. The devil froze mid-scream, its limbs bending in impossible angles as if its body was being forced to experience every possible outcome at once.

A whisper echoed through the speakers, your voice, but layered, like it belonged to multiple versions of you.

"Don't look at me."

The devil let out one last shriek before collapsing into itself, dissolving into a dark, static-like mist that vanished the moment it hit the ground.

People around you broke into applause. Some rushed forward like you were a celebrity, reaching out to thank you, but when they got close, they slowed, staring at you like they suddenly couldn't remember why they approached at all. One woman stepped back, clutching her chest, eyes wide, whispering, "She... what is she?"

The reporter's voice cut back in, trying to keep a professional tone. "An incredible victory by the mysterious devil hunter known only as... well, no one seems to know their name yet. Citizens are calling her a hero after today's attack, though some are struggling to describe exactly what they witnessed."

Another reporter added, almost uncertain. "Whoever she is... we're lucky she's on our side. We think."

The broadcast returned to the studio, the reporters smiling a bit too awkwardly, clearly unsure how to address what they'd just shown.

Your breath hitched, and you instinctively took a step back from the screen.

That wasn't you. Or, it was, but it didn't feel like something you did. It felt like watching a stranger wearing your skin.

Your stomach twisted.

You didn't remember the street.

You didn't remember the devil.

You didn't remember being there at all.

It felt wrong, like you were watching a version of yourself from a timeline you never lived. A version that wasn't human.

Your fingers trembled as you touched your own face again, almost expecting it to feel different.

A quiet, terrified laugh escaped you.

"This... isn't funny," you whispered to no one.

Because the worst part wasn't the missing memory.

It was the feeling creeping up your spine, the sinking realization that the person in that video looked more comfortable in your body than you did. Like they belonged in it.

And you didn't.

You didn't know how much time it spent in your body and how much time had passed since the incident.

You wrapped your arms around yourself, as if trying to hold in whatever was shifting inside you. The room felt colder, almost like the air recognized you as something it shouldn't touch.

For a second, you weren't sure if you wanted answers or if you were scared that getting them would prove you're not you anymore.

Before you could tear your eyes away, the screen flickered again, the news cut to live footage of the streets.

Crowds of people filled the roads, running, chanting, holding up signs with your face, or at least, a blurry drawing of you from the footage.

"UNKNOWN ANGEL! UNKNOWN ANGEL!"

Hundreds of voices changed, echoing over the chaos.

Some held banners that read: "OUR SILENT SAVIOR!"

Others had posters with scribbled fan art, wings made of static, halos like broken circles.

You stared, frozen, as the camera zoomed in on a girl sitting on someone's shoulders, waving a sign made of ripped cardboard. On it was a messy drawing of you holding the fallen devil's severed limb, surrounded by hearts.

"She saved us! The unknown Angel saved us!" the girl screamed into a megaphone, voice cracking with excitement.

Unknown... Angel.

Hearing it out loud made your skin crawl.

But the crowd wasn't all supportive, further down the street, a group of protesters shouted back, holding different signs.

"DEVILS DON'T SAVE - THEY MANIPULATE!"

"WHAT IS SHE REALLY?!"

"DON'T TRUST THE UNKNOWN."

One man, terrified but trying to be brave, yelled at the camera, "She saved us, yeah, but no human should be able to do that. That thing wasn't a rescue, I like to think it was a warning."

Your throat went dry.

People didn't just know you existed, they named you. Idolized you. Feared you.

You were famous.

And you didn't remember earning any of it.

Your reflection faintly painted the black part of the turned-off screen, staring back at you with an expression you didn't recognize.

Your jaw dropped, along with the remote in your hand. You stumbled back and collapsed onto the couch, staring at the now–black screen like it would turn back on and explain everything to you.

You were terrified of yourself. Terrified of what you could potentially become.

Your first instinct was to contact Denji. If anyone would get this, it was him. He's probably gone through crap just as weird, probably weirder. He would understand.

You grabbed your phone and dialed his number, pressing it to your ear.

It rang.

And rang.

And rang.

And rang.

You stood there for a solid minute, tapping your foot on the floor impatiently.

"Hiya! Phone's off. Call me later, biiitch!"

Voicemail, of course.

You snapped your flip phone shut with a little more force than necessary and held it in your hand, tapping your foot again, your fingers twitching with restless panic.

If Denji wasn't picking up, then you were going to him.

You threw on your most unrecognizable disguise, an oversized jacket, sunglasses, and a hat pulled so low it nearly covered your eyes. You looked less like someone hiding from fame and more like someone avoiding child support, but whatever, it worked.

The moment you stepped outside, the noise hit you.

People were marching down the streets holding posters of you, or versions of you. Half of them looked like you were a divine being descending from the heavens, and the other half looked like you crawled out of hell dragging corpses behind you. Very range.

"UNKNOWN ANGEL! UNKNOWN ANGEL!" a crowd cheered as they marched

Posters were plastered on walls, lamp posts, store windows, everywhere. Some were fanart. Some were... depictions that genuinely made you question if that was actually your face or if someone based it off a fever dream.

You were almost at the corner when a reporter suddenly jumped in front of you, microphone nearly jabbing you in the face.

"Excuse me! Hi!" she beamed, camera already rolling. "We're asking citizens how they feel about the Unknown Angel! Do you support her or fear her?"

You froze.

The camera pointed directly at your covered face.

You coughed. "Uhh... personally, I think she should... pay more taxes."

The reporter blinked. "What?"

"Yep. Super illegal to... uh... kill devils without a... devil-killing l-license stamp. Very underground stuff. She's probably in prison right now actually so I gotta go bye."

You ran off in the most suspicious way possible and dissapeared before she could process a single word you said.

In the distance, you spotted the familiar street to Denji and Nayuta's apartment. With every step you took, your heart slammed harder against your ribs.

You had saved people. You had become a symbol. People whispered your name like it carried power

and fear. Unknown Angel, Silent Savior, whatever they called you.

You walked with your head high, shoulders back, feeling good with yourself.

Confidence radiated from you as you reached the door. Everything was going great. Denji would understand. He had to.

You knocked impatiently and the door swung open a few seconds later.

Denji was going to freak when he saw you like this.

He stood there as the door opened, his hair sticking out in every direction, shirt half tucked in, holding a piece of toast in his hand. Nayuta was on the floor behind him, surrounded by dogs, not even looking up.

"Uh... hey? Can I help you?" He looked at you confused.

Your smile froze, then wobbled. "Hilarious. Really. Let me in."

He didn't move. Just blinked at you as he chewed on his food. "Do we... know each other or something?"

That knocked the breath right out of your chest for a second. "Denji, don't mess with me right now." You forced a laugh, but your voice betrayed you. "It's me." You pulled your mask down and your sunglasses up, thinking he didn't recognize you through your disguise.

His brows pulled together as he leaned against the doorframe, squinting like that would somehow help. "Look, if you're selling something, I swear I don't got money. Unless it's food. Is it food?"

A helpless breath left you, half-laugh, half disbelief. "Are you kidding me..." you muttered, more to yourself than to him. You turned away because if you kept looking at him, you would break.

"Hey!"

Denji yelled out to you in urgency. You turned back, hope lighting up for a second.

Denji scratched his neck, eyes running over you with casual confusion. "You're really pretty, though." He flashed a lopsided grin. "If you wanna hang out sometime... I mean, I'm free later."

Something inside you twisted. Not in a sweet way. Your eyes burned and you bit your lip so hard it almost hurt enough to stop the tears.

"...Right." You swallowed hard. "Sure. Thanks."

You turned to leave again, faster this time.

But the door creaked open wider behind you.

"Hold up-" He chased you down the porch. You didn't turn around, not until you heard the hesitation in his next breath and his cold touch on your shoulder. "Did I... say something stupid?"

You stopped. Shoulders stiff. Your hands shook at your sides, not from anger, but from the ache of being forgotten by someone who once held you like you were the only thing keeping him alive.

"...No," you whispered, still not looking at him. "You didn't do anything wrong."

You were right. He didn't do anything wrong. That was definitely the work of a devil.

You turned away from him again and walked away slowly as he stood in the same spot you left in.

You made it down the street before your legs gave out on a bus-stop bench. Your chest was tight and your throat started hurting from holding back your tears.

People moved past you, laughing, arguing, like the world was perfectly intact.

You pressed the heels of your palms to your eyes.

He didn't know you.

A breath, cold and wrong, slid behind your ear.

"What did you expect?"

Your heart dropped. You lifted your head and the world looked the same. Cars. Storefronts. Strangers. Nothing out of place.

Except for it.

Sitting beside you.

The Unknown Devil didn't sit like a person would. It was folded, like space had crumpled where it sat. No clear shape, just a suggestion of limbs, darkness bleeding into the edges of the bench, head tilted in a way that felt curious and cruel at the same time.

A man walking his dog passed straight through its form without seeing a thing.

Your pulse started increasing. "Not now," you whispered, breath shaking. "Please, not-"

Its head snapped toward you. It was an inch away from your face.

"He looked at you like you were nothing."

You wanted a way out of this.

"I don't... want to hear this."

You didn't choose this life.

"Postponing your problems as always, I see. The perfect time will never arrive, my dear."

A soft laugh echoed around you. "You thought he would remember you. Maybe if you weren't such a bore..."

"Stop." People were around. You tried to keep your voice steady and low. "Just leave me alone."

The Devil leaned closer. You couldn't see its face, but you felt its smile, like fingernails pressing into your skin from the inside.

"Walk away if you want to. I'll follow. You can close your eyes, and I'll wait. You can drown yourself in denial..."

Shadows slid across the sidewalk beneath you, moving as if alive, visible only in the corner of your eye.

"...but you are mine. And you know what happens to people who don't know what they are."

A child nearby laughed, chasing a balloon. His shadow flickered wrong for a second, stretching toward you, before snapping back to normal.

Your breath hitched. "What do you want from me?" You couldn't turn in any direction. You just stared up ahead and hoped for the best. Your eyes started to water again.

Its voice softened, brushing the inside of your skull with its long unkept fingernails, and you felt every single one.

"Everything."

Its form dissolved into static and darkness, gone in the blink of an eye.

The world rushed back. Noise, color, motion. Nothing our of the ordinary.

Only your shaking hands remained to prove it hadn't been a hallucination.