Archive of Our Own ^beta

Castiel remembered that one time he and Dean had milkshakes at a diner. He hadn’t been able to taste anything, only the isolated atoms of each ingredients, but never the full picture of the pleasure that had lit up Dean’s face.

After a few sips, Castiel had pushed his milkshake across the table. Dean had taken it without hesitation. Castiel had listened to Dean's heart beat pick up rapidly, rolling his eyes. He had told Dean countless times before to lay off the sugar.

That was then. Things are different now.

Currently, Castiel's mind felt scrambled, like the breakfast eggs Dean made. Honestly, his brain felt like it was being processed into a milkshake

Zachariah had just yanked him out of his universe and hurled him through countless dimensions. Castiel had never truly landed in any of them, only drifted along it's the edges, catching fleeting glimpses of their creation before being flung away again, never anything feasible. His feet never touched solid ground. The moment he neared another world, something yanked him back, chucked away by a phantom leash tightened around his neck, dragging him away.

Until, finally.

His feet touched solid ground.

The air was thin, drained of life. The room around him was dark, abandoned, industrial. A hollow space, devoid of human love.

Castiel rose slowly, feeling the concrete sigh beneath his weight. His trench coat billowed faintly as he scanned his surroundings, eyes tracing every atom that made up this unfamiliar place.

Wherever this was, it was not his world.

He seemed to be located in a facility underground, no windows,no light. Everything felt stagnant, like the world wasn't turning in this particular area, The only certainty he could pick up on, was the walls that were tainted with suffering, echoing with screams and groans of pain of the past.

Some sort of facility. Though he couldn’t place exactly what it was, he felt the foulness of it in his bones, something fundamentally heinous at its core.

He moved carefully, footsteps quiet on the cold floor, searching for any clue that could tell him where exactly he was. So far, nothing revealed itself. He barely managed to coordinate in the real world without Dean’s and Sam's guidance. He couldn't feel Dean's soul, couldn't hear the jokes the man would make. Utter solitude.

He thought he was alone.

But then he sensed a flickering light, faint and fractured. The remnants of a soul, bleak and tattered. Unfamiliar at first glance, yet something in its resonance unsettled him, pulling at Castiel's essence calling out for him, for something.

He followed it, moving through the darkened labyrinth of rusted and abandoned machinery. The air was heavy with dust and silence, it felt like breathing in ash, the only sounds he could make out were those of his steps, the singular dust particles flying around and most of all the grating sounds of echoing screams, that weren't echoes of the current time, but rather, a part of the past, that was still jumping from one wall to the other.

The deeper he went, the stronger the pull became, until at last he stopped, staring up at tall a sealed pod.

Maybe he should refrain from opening it, it could be a trick of Zachariah's, but he can't help himself. It wasn’t in his nature to turn his back on something, or someone, left to rot in the dark.

With a slow breath, he raised his hand and pressed it to the cold metal, gripping it tight. He tore it open, the titanium metal nowhere near a match to his strengthy The pod gave way easily, like paper.

He stepped back, his breath steady, the faint hum of his grace still stirring beneath his skin. Why did he still have his grace, why would Zachariah not have taken it away?

The pod hissed as it opened for the first time in decades it seems, a gust of white gas spilled put and mixed with dead air of the room. Castiel stepped back instinctively, eyes narrowing. Inside, a man lay slumped, a full beard covering his face, his body hooked up in wires and tubes.

The gas began to mingle with air and eventually disappeared, revealing the man inside, who was coughing harshly, his chest jerking as he strained against the restraints. Before he could even reach for them, Castiel moved. He stepped forward, ripped the cords with ease. Without hesitation, he gripped the man by the shoulder and hauled himout of the pod.

And then Castiel saw him.

He froze, his grip loosening, arms falling to his sides.

This face, it was Dean. Or no, not his Dean. But undeniably Dean all the same. A wrong fake. This version was older, far older, the full beard, the face rugged and worn in ways Dean’s had never looked, but clearly tortured in a way that Dean was, but, still, their souls could not be more different from each other.

Castiel could only stand there, caught in the surreality, looking at a man who looked like Dean, with a hollow soul.

Dean had been pure, in his way. Righteous. The cracks in his soul were held together by love, by loyalty. That was who Dean was. The very definition of goodness, though he could not see it himself. In contrast, this man's souls was something else entirely. Broken and rotten, with nothing to hold it together but decaying strings.

There were benial flickers of a dim light occasionally, faint allusions that there had once, a long time ago, been something good, but they were rare.

But this looks exactly like an older version of Dean. The flesh is the same, almost, something about the blood is different, like it has been corrupted, the biological markup changed by a foreign intervention , but the blueprint, as far as Castiel can tell, had once been the same as Dean's.

Castiel's staring, was cut short, when the still naked and shamelessly unbothered man, strode past him without a glance, as if Castiel wasn’t even there. His steps were steady, with no clear direction, but still deliberate.

Castiel ripped himself out of his stupor, He turned and followed quickly. Whatever this man was, whoever, he might be Castiel’s only way back to his own world. Back to the real Dean. Because this was anything but a coincidence, this must be a sick riddle he had to solve.

They didn’t get far before chaos erupted.

Armed guards stormed in, guns raised without hesitation, not as a threat but with the purpose to kill. A barrage of bullets were unleashed straight at the naked man.

For an agonising moment, Castiel was sure it was over. No human could survive that.

But, no. The man stood unharmed, like a lighthouse in a storm, utterly still. The bullets had ricocheted off him like raindrops. He didn’t even flinch. Im fact, the bullets had flattened against the man's bare skin, as if he were made of stone.

A light, radioactive and distructive in nature ignited in the mans chest, trying to claw it's way out of its depths.

Castiel's eyes narrowed in suspicion and curiosity, this man wasn't a human, not like Dean, this shouldn't be possible.

The lighter the light grew, the darker the man's sould became. It was such a fast decline of a soul that Castiel hissed. He couldn't allowe this man to destroy his battered soul further, without hesitation he acted. Upon instinct.

Stepping forward, he gripped the man's shoulder, fingers digging into the familiar yet unfamiliar flesh and shoved him aside, away from the guards, sending him sprawling across the room, with little to no effort.

Then Castiel turned his focus on the guards, he lifted his fingers with ease and when he snapped them the guards dropped like flies, into a deep slumber. Once the sound of the final weapong clattering to the ground echoed, he turned his back on them without another glance.

His eyes locked on the man lying on the ground, the light of glowing embers in his chest had snuffed out to nothing but mere remains of radioactive light glowing around him, something not seen by the human eye.

There was a look of bewildered and something else in his eyes as they stared at each other wordlessly.

Neither of them spoke.

Until of them did.

"Who the fuck are you?" the man growled pushing himself to his feet, drawing up to his full height, utterly unperturbed by his nakedness. Castiel averted his gaze, shifting his eyes downward, out of respect to Dean. Dean had always been protective about his personal space and privacy and this seemed to fall into that category.

"I'm the one gripped you tighted and pulled you out of your restraints." Castiel replied calmly, the words slipped put with a familar ease.

He kept his gaze on the man, head tilting a little. The way those bullets had bounced off of him. The light that had pierced through his skin. None of it was something humanly possible.

"The hell are you starin' at?" the man drawled stepping closer. His voice was rough and wrong, like he hadn't spoken in a while. Castiel believed the echoing screams he had heard must have belonged to him. His eyes were hostile and defensive. "Think I'm gonna say thanks? Keep you fucking eyes to yourself, Bluey."

He loomed even closer, broad and solid like a bear, daring Castiel to run off. To anyone else this display might've been threatening. But Castiel just stoof there, his gaze sharp and cutting, unapologetic.

Apparently this made the man more angry.

"You got a death wish somewhere in that empty brain, trench coat?"

And then without warning he promptly drove his fist through Castiel's chest so.

Castiel looked down at himself slowly, watching the hand withdraw from his chest, covered in blood and grime. He frowned, inspecting the hole in his trenchcoat and in his body, as his chest knit itself together. Though the trench coat stayed bloody with a hole.

And then despite himself, and the severity of this situation the corners of his mouth ticked upward in unadultered glee and amusement.

This was familar!

The first time he had met Dean, without counting hell, Dean had stuck a knife through his chest as well. Only difference was that this version hadn't needed a blade, just his own hands.

As the wound in his chest sealed shut, he öifted his gaze, eyes narrowing. Once again it became clear that this man wasn't human, but Castiel had never encountered a being like him in his entire lengthy existence before.

Castiel has questions that need answering.

"We need to talk." Castiel said voice calm.

The man stared at himself slowly for a second with something like shock before he masked it with a snarl, clenching his fist tight in anger.

Without hesitation he swung aiming for Castiel's face.

Castiel caught his wrist in midair, fingers closing around it like a promise, with practiced restraint careful not to break anything, though he has a feeling that this specimen is very durable.

"I said we need to talk." Castiel's repeated, his tone sharper.

"Now."

"Who are you?" The man says once again, clearly offput by the display of strength.

"Castiel."

The man gave him a glare. "You think I give a shit about your fuckass name buddy? I wanna know what you are, freak."

"I'm an angel of the lord." Castiel rememberd what Dean's reaction to these very same words had been, he wonders if this man's reaction will be similar.

"Fucking hell, that's gotta be the dumbest supe name I have ever heard." The man cackled meanly.

"Soup name?" Castiel echoed, brow furrowing in confusion. "I dont like soup, I dont need to eat."

The man stopped short. He stared, his green eyes, narrowing dangerously, unsure wether he a was being messed with or if Castiel was really that stupid.

"You making fun of me, with that accountant get up?" The man stepped closer, jabbing a finger at Castiel's chest, the same place he had previously shoved his hand through.
"Just wait till I wrap that stupid coat around your neck and choke the crazy out of you, we'll see who'll make fun of who then. In fact I might just take big fat dump on your corpse."

Castiel sighed, a long and exhausted breath. His patience leave him. A virtue he had once mastered. But now he has important matters to attend to, matters that just happen to be located in another plane of existence, so he doesn't feel especially patient.

"What's your name?" Castiel asked squaring his shoulders, trying to ignore the disturbing imagery the man's threat had evoked in his mind.

The man snorted, rolling his eyes. "Like you haven't heard of me before, you a psycho fan or something, that why you rescued me, trying to get a private session you digusting fuck?"

But when he caught Castiel's look of geniune perplexion, his face mirrored the man's confusion a little hurt, his ego slightly bruised. Who then fuck does this fucker think he is?

"Soldier boy." He said at last, with a puffed up chest.

Castiel blinked. "That's an unusual name. Is Soldier your first name and Boy your last name?"

"Seriously?" Soldier boy just stared at him.

"Apologies.I have never heard of such a name before." Castiel replies geniunely earnest.

"It's my supe name, genius. Did someone take a shit in that pretty brain of yours?"

"No, that sounds unpleasant and anatomically impossible. What's a soup name?" Castiel asked.

"Supe name. Not soup." Soldier boy squinted at the man before him with a suspicious gaze.

Castiel just tilted his head, eyes narrowed. Talking to this man is like receiving an onslaught of those references Dean made, that fly past his head.

"You fucking with me trench coat?" Soldier boy huffed.

"We are not fucking." Castiel answered straight faced.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" The man barked in disgust, going slighty red, his blood pressure climbing up. "I shoved my hand into your chest and you just healed. You're a superhero as well, don't act stupid."

"Superhero?" Castiel repeated with a tilted head, his brain grasping at clues, until finally he remembered something. "Like Superman, Dean made me watch that movie."

"Superhero, like me. Soldier boy." He jabbed a thumb at his own chest this time, puffing up like a puffer fish.

"You're like Superman?" Castiel asked brow creasing.

"Dont know who that is, I know I'm better than him." He shot back with a grin, letting his eyes roam over Castiel. "Who the fuck is that Dean guy anyway?"

"I believe we should have this conversation somewhere else." Castiel's eyes flickered away.

"I aint going anywhere with you, freak."

This time, Castiel stepped forward, closing the distance between them, his eyes datermined and unwavering. Instinctively, Soldier Boy almost took a stel back, before catching himself.

"You don't think you can trust me?" Castiel asked quietly, before seeming to pick up on something in fake Dean's gaze.

"Oh, I see, you don't think you can trust anyone. That's your problem. " His head tilted with that unsettling stillness. Otherwordly.

“No shit, I don’t trust you. And shut up with that, you don't know anything, trust is what got me here in the first place, fuck, you could be some dirty commie for all I know.” Soldier boy's chest got brighter and Castiel bit his tongue.

"Commie? I can assure you I'm not a communist, I have little interest in humanties political affairs." Almost instantaneously the gleam of light dissapeared, though Castiel could still sense it.

"Yeah, still not goin' with you anywhere. Go find your brainless boytoy, what's his name again– Dean? Fucking fa-." At the mention of Dean, Cas snapped out of it.

Before he could finish saying what Castiel assumed would be a slur against homosexual's, Castiel's expression hardened, his patience finally rendered to nothing, his hand snapped forward gripping Soldier Boy shoulder with a bonecrushing grip. Calling dean brainless had been a mistake. The other man tried to pry his finger's away unsuccessfully he just regarded Castiel with wide eyes, and something more hidden. It seemed to Castiel that this man was not used to being overpowered.

"We are taking this convo somewhere else." he said voice low, with no room for doubt. Final and comanding, deserving of respect.

With a flutter of wings, they vanished out of there and instead reappeared in a motel room in Kansas. He had imagined a room that he in Dean had been to once, not even sure that it wouldn ecist in this planet, and fortunately it does, which means that this world shared more similarities with his own, than just the man with Dean's flesh.

They hit the bed hard, Soldier Boy landing flat on his back with Castiel sprawled on top, straddling the naked man before either of them could react. A few seconds pass where they just look at each other, until the man's disoriented and daze look dissapeard and another expression was put up.

“The fuck–get the fuck off me you cocksucker!” Soldier Boy barked, shoving Castiel hard in the chest. Castiel went willingly.

He slid off, rising to his feet with a small, thoughtful nod. “Ah. Right. Personal space.”

He eyed the man's unclothed for a beat, then disappeared in a flutter of wings to the room next door, reappeared a few seconds later, holding a bundle of clothes in his hands. A pair of grey joggers and blue jersey. Castiel hoped for forgiveness from the human's he stole these clothes from.

"Put these on." He said trying to sound nice, offering, the stolen clothes.

Soldier boy eyed them with a scowl, but snatched them away nonetheless, turning around and yanking them on roughly. "You fucking enjoying the show there, fag?"

He tugged the jersey down finally and turned back around to notice that Castiel hadn't been looking at him change but rather he had back turning playing with a magazine. He coughed trying to get the weirdo's attention.

"So what is this? Your superpowers are teleportation and playing dress up?" It's said with condescending huff of breath

"My power lies in the grace that I derive from the heavenly body." Castiel's eyes didn't flicker

The man muttered something under his breath. "Fucking clowns....where are we anyway?"

"I flew us to Kansas I believe we were in russia earlier, how did you end up there, Soldier boy?" Castiel tilted his head.

"Name's Ben, sounds creepy as shit when call me that." Ben condescended.

"Hello, Ben." Castiel quirked a pleased smile.

"Whatever." The man huffed, walking past Castiel intentionally brushing his shoulder Castiel as he flops down on the bed.

The moment they had touched Castiel picked up on a myriad of things, he frowned, walking up to the man, sitting on the bed.

Without hesitating he got down on one knee and looked up at Ben, loose strands of hair sticking up wildly. Ben's eyes widen for a second, he spread his legs open almost instinctively, observing the other man.

When Castiel put a hand on his knee, with that creepy stare of his, he cussed loudly.

"Whatever the fuck are you playing at, cum gu-." He had just been about to insult the shit out of Castiel, when he feels a comfortable tingle go up his spine, leaving behind a sense of comfort in its wake, something he hadn't felt in decades. So he bit his lip and shit up, revelling in the feeling. It felt better than drugs.

"It's my grace, apologies, I should have asked." Castiel moved to remove his hand, from Ben's knee, but fuck that, Ben wasn't going to let that happen, he doesn't know what that grace bullshit is, all he knows is that it feels fucking great, and he loves drugs, and this man's touch feels better than coke.

"No, do that, again." Ben rasped, looking at Cas like an addict.

Castiel frowned, maybe the man needed more healing? He sends another dose of grace through the man's body, it shoots through Ben like electricity, the decaying strings of his sould, were being replaced by bandaids, flicking him together, tying him at its seams.

There wasn't anything physically wrong with Ben, Castiel figured, his genology seems to have been artificially expanded, to heal itself in a matter of minutes, a scientific feat that wasn't within possibility in Castiel's world. This must be a thing unique to this place.

He looked up at Ben, a loose strand of hair falling across his face, cutting his field of vision,

He didn't expect Ben to reach, rough and unthinking, with the sole intent of brushing the strand away. The man seemed as surprised as Castiel by that act.

Even less expected was what came next, Ben's hand fisted his hair harshly, unforgiving, hard enough that anyone else would have flinched or winced. But Castiel didn't, he let the man pull his head up, going willingly, like a lamb to slaughter, his gaze steady as he was forced to meet Ben's without any disruptions.

Ben's face was flushed now, his breathing uneven. The radioactive aura that had clung to him, remnants of what must have happened to him in that facility had dissipated with Castiel's grace coarsing through his veins, pumping away the poison. Castiel realized he must've cleansed it.

Still even without apparent physical harm Castiel was not under the delusion that the man's mind was bestowed that same privilege. Because Castiel could feel the battlefield, that was the Ben's mind, it was strangely reminiscent of Dean. There was hurt everwhere, but for now, the screams had dimmed. Ben's usual bluntness was dulled and its place was a momentary expression of bliss.

Their eyes locked and once again neither of them spoke.

He thought Ben's fight or flight was going to kick in at any moment, but the man just licked his lips, Castiel could see him fighting with himself behind his eyes, and at last he had seemed to have come to a conclusion.

Because with the hand that wasn't gripping Castiel's hair, he sneaked it down on his body, Castiel couldn't see what he was doing, because Ben was forcing him to look at him, and Castiel was fine with that. Because looking at that face felt like home, a warped version if it, but home nonetheless.

There was a tug and Castiel dared to look down, where Ben had just removed his pants to reveal his hard dick. An erection.

Castiel remembers the one time he had had one, when Dean and Sam had been in the room and he had watched what he had come to discover was porn.

He looked away from the statistically very impressive size of Ben's erection, and couldn't help but wonder if Dean was the same. When Castiel had rebuild Dean's body he hadn't paid much mind to it, his only drive was saving the righteous man. But now he feels his mind wander, and there's a feeling in his chest, that he wants to rip out. He had never felt like this before.

"What are you thinking about?" Ben asked with a slight hint of anger, fisting Castiel's hair tighter, asking for attention, while he strokes himself lazily with his other hand.

"A friend." Castiel replied.

"Oh, 'a friend'" Ben immitated Castiel's answer with a mocking tone. "I'm sure that's all it is."

"We do share a profound bond." Castiel can't help but reply, because it's true. Though that word doesn't do his feelings towards Dean justice. Is there a word that exist in the human language that can correctly, describe the feeling, of being willing to fall for someone?

Maybe it's faith, the slight hope, that makes Castiel what he is, a celestial being of pure faith, the desperate wish, that Dean will be there to catch him when his wings are cut off. But also the acceptance, that he might land on the hard ground with no one there but himself, no grace, no wings or Dean. But that's just the thing isn't? He would do it anyway, even if it happens to be the latter option.

"Profound bond my ass. This about that Dean fucker you mentioned?" Ben asked obviously annoyed and ticked off.

"Don't call him that, but yes, it's about him, it usually happens to be about him." Castiel sighed locking his gaze with Ben, the beard he had sported earlier was gone, he must have shaved it when Castiel had went off to find him the jersey and joggers–which he had taken off.

He is handsome.

"That's fucking disgusting dude, a pair of cocksuckers." Ben replied, apparently unaware of how ironic him saying that is, because while Castiel isn't very aware of social norms, he is pretty sure that this position they have gotten themselves into, would be considered gay by most.

"It's not like that, we are friends." Castiel rolled his eyes and Ben coughed.

"You never sucked a dick before then?" He replied of handedly, while loosing his grip in Castiel's hair a little, just to play with it.

"No, I have never engaged in sexual acts." Castiel admitted with a straight look.

Ben looked at him for a second and then without pause, he smirked. "Well, that's just a waste of perfectly good lips. Maybe you should put em' to use. Mouth's a mouth after all."

"I suppose I can follow your logic." Castiel thought this over and to his surprise he found himself wanting to do exactly that, how can someone crave something they had never tasted before? It seemed like a logical fallacy.

"Then follow it by sucking me off, will ya." Ben grumbled and moved Castiel's head to his crotch, but then loosened his grip slightly to wait and see if Castiel will acquiesce.

There was a slight moment of silence, their breaths the only thing filling the room.

Castiel eyed Ben's erection for a second and moved his head forward, giving the flushed tip a curious lick.

It didn't taste like atoms, as most things do, it tasted like something else, human, a little salty a little bitter, but not bad. Better than a milkshake, but worse than a burger is the conclusion he arrived at.

But Ben's breathy gasp, that sounded high and uncontrolled, devoid of the meticulously placed facade of roughness, made Castiel twitch in his own pants. He liked that sound very much.

He swirled his tongue around the tip, going with the flow, Ben's moans, edged him on to go further. He took it deeper into his mouth, though he couldn't fit most of it, it was a very sizeable member after all.

Whenever Ben's sounds got particularly breathy, he pulled of a little, waiting for a few seconds before repeating the same thing. Apparently Ben liked that, getting driven to edge, but not being pushed off. Ben would grip his hands tighter at those moments, and Castiel could feel him resisting pushing him down. Not that he could, but if he did Castiel would go down willingly.

He decided to suck on it, feeling the veins pulse under his tongue as he went up and down.

"Fuck, Cas." Ben moaned tightening his hold but still not pushing Cas down.
"Can't believe you never done this before. So fucking good. Your friends missing out."

Castiel stilled at that nickname he felt his own blood go south, filling his erection that was straining at this point.

He pulled of looking at Ben, he looked sinful. No sight of the carefully placed mask of stoism, just pure bliss, big pupils, and a flush that probably went down further, but that was covered by the jersey. What a pity.

Ben's legs were shaking slightly, so Castiel put a steadying hand on the man's thigh, letting a little bit of grace reach out beyond his fingertips unintentionally. Ben seemed to like it though, because he bucked up and Castiel went down again licking a big stripe up to the tip while keeping his eyes on Ben, taking in every single twitch of muscle, or moment of bliss in the man's eyes.

"Fuck, I can't hold it anymore, I'm gonna come, open that mouth." Ben choked out, reaching out a hand to trace Castiel's puffy lips.

"You can push me down it's fine, I don't break easily." Castiel replied his voice hoarse, he gave Ben's finger a tentative lick and the man just lost it because in a second, he had both his hands in Castiel's hair again pushing him down on his cock, up and down.

Castiel got used to it quickly and let himself be used, he could feel the dick pulse in his throat. He must be close to ejaculating.

One of Ben's hand travelled down Cas's throat gripping it tightly like a vice, wrapping around it like a snake. Fucking himself into Castiel's throat, like a man on a mission, while feeling himself through Castiel's throat.

"Gonne fill you up, tapped that mouth before your fucking boytoy, make sure to tell him, will ya?" Ben groaned with a hint of possesiveness.

"That I defiled his 'angel', corrupted you." Ben kept on going, speaking mindlessly.

Castiel's teeth grazed Ben's dick a little and Ben came in that very moment, flooding Cas's mouth with cum. He bucked into the feeling, emptying himself into Castiel's throat, he loosened his grip but Cas didn't pull of he just stayed there swallowing.

Eventually Ben pulled him off with a harsh hand, tilting his head back and looking down at him wildly, he stood up from the bed, towering over Castiel's kneeling form.

He took his softening dick to Castiel's lips, smearing the rest of his come across Cas's lips, clearly enjoying the moment. He looked like the artists Castiel had observed in ancient times, hunched over their canvases, laying down the final, perfect strokes to complete their masterpieces

They had had the same look in their eyes as Ben does in this very moment.

"Look at ya. Putting all those pornstars at shame with those eyes." Ben cackled slapping Castiel with his dick, before finally tucking it away.

"Fuck, I don't even care that you're a guy, never came so hard. And let me tell ya, I have fucked half the woman in the States." He sighed jumping on the bed, eyeing Castiel hungrily.

"That is quite a lot of people." Castiel replied standing up, his knees were a little sore.

Ben's eyes roamed over Castiel's body like he was taking in a piece of meat, after having been starved for his whole life.

Then he licked his lips, smirking, when he noticed the bulge in Castiel's pants.

"No way, you got hard from me fucking your mouth? You were fucking starving for it weren't ya?" Ben stood up approaching Cas confidently. "Gave ya what you've always wanted, huh? What that cuck Dean couldn't give you? Marked you up before he could."

Castiel rolled his eyes, in exasperation. Ben talked like the man in the porn Dean watched.

"I'm not sure what you want me to reply?" He raised his brow tentatively.

Ben gave him a mean look, something deeply possesive and wanting, it was so palpable that anyone in the vicinty should be able to feel it.

The man took a step closer until finally, he was close enough to whisper something into Cas's ear.

He didn't say anything, just let his hand roam down Castiel's body and into his pants, he grabbed Cas's dick and pumped it a few times.

Castiel gasped it was a type of pleasure he had never felt before, it felt electrifying. He groaned lowly, voice deep like a rumble and Ben giggled.

"You like that?" He whispered into Cas's ear.

"Yeah." Castiel groaned roughly gripping Ben's shoulder roughly, steadying himself.

"Say my name." Ben said biting down on Cas's neck.

"Ben?" Castiel said confused.

The man rolled his eyes and gave Castiel's dick a hard tuck, which made the man moan his name. "Ben! I want....I want!"

"Hm, what do you want?" Ben leered like a tiger watching his prey walk right into it's claws.

"Dean." Castiel gasped out instinctively.

Ben halted his movements slightly, he looked at Castiel who seemed to be unaware of what he was saying, lost in pleasure. Ben surpressed his anger and decided to go with it, he bit Castiel neck again, licking it with his tongue.

"Yeah, what do you wanna do with him? Suck his dick like you did for me?" Ben leads the conversation, feeling oddly satisfied that he got to Castiel first. He doesn't know this 'Dean', but mentally he's giving him the finger. Suck it, loser!

"I think....I want to be close to him." Castiel babbled mindlessly as Ben stroked him slowly.

"You want him to fuck you up the ass? That's pretty queer, Cas." Ben mumbled, he really hopes Dean's dick will never enter that place, at least not before Ben himself does. He felt his dick twitch in his pants once again, after all he has been starved of sex for decades, he's a little backed up.

"I want to tell him how perfect he is, worship him. Be inside him." Castiel rested his head on Ben's shoulder closing his eyes as fucked Ben's fist.

Ben can't help but feel jealous, it's just, he came down Cas's throat, marked up his neck, that practically makes him Ben's? He doesn't wanna share this with Dean, that fucker can go fuck himself or something.

"Well tough luck, Cas. You're with me, I got the better dick anyway." Ben sneers and gives one last twist of his wrist and Castiel comes for the first time ever.

They came down from their high, blood slowly rushing through their veins, Ben sat down on the bed.

When suddenly time stood still, not in a metamorphical sense, but literally. Ben was frozen in time, nothing moved except for Cas, who slipped his angel blade out of sleeve looking around the room, waiting.

No entity has the power to stop time, except for a select few.

"Heya, little bro!" He heard a familiar, cheery voice call out from behind him.

Castiel spun around instinctively, blade raised high only to find himself face to face with Gabriel.

“Gabriel?” Castiel’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What are you doing here?”

"Well, silly isn't it obvious?" Gabriel grinned and flopped down onto the bed next to Ben, who was still frozen.

"I don't believe it is." Castiel stared tightlipped at his brother, grip getting exponentially tighter on his blade.

Gabriel rolled his eyes overdramatically. "Loosen up, Cassie! I'm just doing you a favor, you're my little bro after all."

Castiel waited for him to continue speaking unimpressed.

"I sent you on a little vacation! Seeing you trail after Dean like a love sick puppy, breaks my heart! So I thought– hey! Why not give you a version of Dean that isn't emotionally unavailable or well stupid?" Gabriel replied with a saccharine smile, crossing his legs as he looked from Ben's debauched sight to Castiel's. "Guess it worked, huh?"

Castiel’s eyes narrowed still confused on why Gabriel would do this, though he suppose he doesn't need a reason. “I thought Zachariah sent me here. Gabriel, you need to send me back. I’m needed.”

Gabriel sighed, getting to his feet with a flourish. “Yeah, yeah, all in good time. Your precious Deano's on a little…. let’s call it forced vacation too. Although, between you and me? He’s not having nearly as much fun as you are.”

"What are you talking about? Is Dean hurt?" Castiel asked a stone sinking in chest. He'f been here indulging in promiscuous behavior, while Dean could be out there in pain?

Gabriel hiffed a laugh waving a dissmissive hand at Castiel. "Relax, Cas. Dean's fine....probably, mostly. Zachariah stuck him in some messed up apocalyptic world– you know a boring little glimpse into what could happen if he said no to Michael. No creativty, flaire."

"Gabriel.." Castiel's jaw clenched, the light flickering around him.

Gabriel whistled. "Talk about a tough crowd, really Cas, I say this with your best interest in mind, you gotta get that stick out of your ass."

At Castiel's indignant stare, Gabriel thought he looked like a drenched kitten, he went on. "Fine, fine I'll send you back, in two minutes. Say goodbye to your boytoy."

Gabriel smirked as he walked towards the door. "Say your goodbyes Cas, I really gotta get back to this party. But let me just say your boyfriend here?– founded the best fucking party concept ever! Herogasm? Fucking spectacular."

With a flutter of wings, Gabriel vanished.

Time lurched back into motion, slipping smoothly from frozen to flowing. Ben moved as if nothing had happened, his eyes locking onto Castiel’s with a slow, knowing smirk.

"Ben, I need to return." Castiel replied quietly sitting down beside Ben. He stared at the ground, as if waiting for an answer to a question he never dared to ask.

Ben shot him a look. "Where to?"

"My world." Castiel replied thinking of Dean.

"Dang, Cas. Hit em and quit em', didn't think you had it in you." Ben bumbed him roughly in the shoulder, feeling his chest seize up a little.

"It's not like that," Castiel said quickly, eyes flicking up, so earnestly that Ben swallowed. "I had a good time with here, with you."

"Don't be disgusting. It's whatever we had fun and now you're gonna leave. Who the fuck cares?" Ben stood up angrily, throwing Cas a snide look.

"Ben." Castiel said sternly catching the man's gaze easily. "They need me there."

"You mean he needs you." Ben huffed crossing his arms.

"....I suppose you're right. But I can't run away from my responsibilities." Castiel said standing up walking up to Ben.

Ben felt the heat return to his chest, Castiel saw the radioactive atoms slowly, materialise inside the man, despite the healing he did earlier. They were sizziling madly.

Ben's jaw ticked. and he gave a cruel smile, something that couldn't even be considered a smile. A singul falsifiction of the word. "Yeah, well, I got responsibilities too. Whole lotta former teammates waiting to get fried by me."

"What-" Castiel frowned in confusion, worried.

Before he could finish, Ben grabbed him by his blue tie, yanked him forward, and crushed their mouths together in a brutal kiss.

It was messy, all teeth and tongue, and it caught Castiel completely off guard, but it was good, strangely enough, and another first for Cas.

Ben groaned low in his throat, then pulled back, eyes blazing with embers, but not before biting down hard on Castiel’s lip, just enough to draw blood. And then one.

"A little souvenir." Ben smirked with a weird expression turning away from Cas.

And just like that, Gabriel reappeared with a snap of wings and a flash of light, his hand gripping Cas's.

"Time's up lover boy," he whispered to Cas with a wink– and just like that, in a blink the were gone, whisked away across universes, much more comfortably this time, ripping past multiple worlds, in search for the only one that mattered to Castiel.

When Ben turned around he found the room empty. No trace of Castiel, no flapping sound, just silence.

They only thing left behind, the only proof that Castiel had ever been there, was the weird hand-shaped bruise forming on Ben's shoulder- right where Cas had gripped him earlier.

Ben looked at it, jaw tight and muttered under his breath, "Huh, guess that's your souvenir."

/////

Castiel appeared alone on the road, where had previously stood, when he noticed Dean approaching him.

His heart lifted slightly checking for any signs of hurt but he seemed to be fine.

Dean ran up to him.

"Pretty nice timing, Cas." Dean said when they were face to face in the glow of the streetlights.

Castiel gave a small smile. "We had an appointment."

Dean out his hand on Cas's shoulder for a change. "Don't ever change-"

Then Dean's expression twisted, as he looked Cas up and down, from bite mark on the Cas's neck to the bite mark on his lip, that was still blood. Castiel hadn't thought to change it. You keep gifts, no?

"What the fuck, Cas." Dean jaw tightened his eyes wide. "Did you get laid?"

Castiel blinked remembering Ben.

"Not exactly."

"The fuck do you mean, buddy? I aint blind." Dean stepped back, eyes twitching. "You look like you were mauled by a vampire."

"Ben is not a vampire." Castiel answered.

"Ben?" Dean said, looking weirdly hurt. His arms dropped to his side and he just looked at Castiel.

The Castiel he had left behind, was pure, unlike the Cas he had just spent time with in that fucking messed up world, the Cas who had kinky sec and orgies.

He changed, Dean thought. And Dean hadn't been there one to change him.

"You fucked a guy?" Is all that Dean said.

"We did not 'fuck'" Castiel rolled his eyes, emphasising his points with finger quotes.

Somehow that made Dean feel better, the sight of the fucking air quotes, a reminder that Cas is still Cas, eventhough....someone got to him.

Castiel mistook Dean's silence as a hint to explain.

"We engaged in oral sex." He said simply staring at Dean.

"Oh, okay. So while I was fighting for my fucking life you–what? Fucked some random dude in the mouth? Thanks Cas." Dean replies angrily, he knew it wasn't fair to say, who knows how many times he had left Cas to hook up with some girl.

Castiel felt his heart clench a little, he covered up the bite mark on his neck with his hand, looking at Dean in frustration.

"Actually it was the othery way around." Castiel said turning away.

Dean's brain chose not to process that piece of information, feeling his stomach give out, as he ran after Cas instinctively.

"Cas! You can't just leave everytime things get uncomfortable!" He screamed and Cas halted, turning around to watch Dean out of breath.

"Why are you so mad, Dean?" Castiel said at last, tilting his head.

"I'm not-," Dean muttered, before licking his lip, because Cas was right, he was mad. But why?

"Son of a bitch, okay, fine. Maybe I'm pissed, Cas. You're my best friend, okay? I don't want you getting hurt–," Dean gestured wildy at Castiel's debauched state, wondering how he didn't notice earlier, "I don't want some random guy corrupting what's...."

"What's what, Dean" Castiel breathed in sync with Dean's rapidly rising heartbeat.

Mine, Dean tought. He didn't want anyone corrupting what's his.

The realisation felt like a needle poking a ballon, suddenly all anger drained out of him, leaving him standing there feeling exposed and dumb.

"What's....pure." Dean settled on saying instead.

He swallowed around the lie, feeling his throat get drier, dragging his gaze away from Cas's calculating stare. Dean heard John's voice screaming in his ear, felt his walls raise, but he couldn't bring himself to tune out, he just fucking couldn't.

“Dean, the moment I laid eyes on you in Hell, I was lost. I’m not pure, far from it, and you know than better than anyone. I've killed, I've hurt people....hurt you. I’m… falling fo—” He caught himself, eyes flicking down, “falling from grace.” Castiel stepped closer slowly. "All of it was my choice, free will, which you showed me."

"No one corrupted me." Castiel insisted.

"But I did." Dean croaked out unblinkly.

Castiel could lie and add upon the countless of sins he had commited since he'd met Dean. But what would be the point in that? They both know it's true.

"I'm glad you changed me, Dean. I'm glad it was you." Castiel tried.

"I wish I hadn't." Dean whispered, eyes looking anywhere but at Cas. "But I'm glad it happened and I'm happy I met you, that you're my best friend. Is that selfish?"

"No, Dean. I think that's human." The angel sighed.

"Look at you teaching me about what's human." Dean chuckled weakly.

"I learned from the best." Castiel smiled slowly.

As Dean let his gaze wander over Castiel's face, down to that fucking bite mark on the man's lip, he was gripped by urgency.

He felt like he had been flung into a race, he didn't even know he was running, because until now, he hadn't had competition, apart from himself, his own thoughts and self sabotage.

But now he did have competition apparently.

And Dean hated losing. He's gonna cross that finish line.

Dean hesitated for a minute before letting his lips curl up.

"Well, I haven't shown you everything there is to being human." Dean smiled at Castiel.

"Like what?" Castiel tilted his head.

Dean's hand came up slowly, intentionally, to craddle the sides of Cas's face, his calloused fingertips burshing over the softtly shaven face, tracing aimlessy, buying time, as he collected his thoughts. He doesn't want to do this on a whim, for once, he wants to do something deliberately.

Not like the hunts where he just hoped for everything to work out in his favor. Eventhough that usually worked, he isn't going to take a chance on this.

His thumb skimmed to edge of Castiel's sharp jaw, as he stared into those blue eyes trying not to drown, like a fisherman, under a siren's spell.

They were so close, the air they were breathing was the same. Mingling together in the small soace between them.

And when Castiel tilted his head in that special way of his, Dean broke down his last fortress of hestitation, because beyond that wall could be one of the greatest experiences waiting for him, Dean doesn't get opportunities like that often. So he ventures forward, grinning wide.

Purely happy.

"This." Dean said, before pulling Cas towards himself and connection their lips together in a gentle embrace.

They are stuck in that moment for a while, in their own little heaven on earth. A respite from the chaos that waged all around them.