Chapter Text
1x1 was always seen a little strangely by others— his translucent, faintly glowing green torso being one of the more immediate reasons. It always managed to pull a few glances toward him, even when no one dared to say anything out loud. He never cared much for their opinions. Still, if he was out in public with John, he at least made a half-hearted effort to keep attention off himself. A dark coat worn over his frame, hands tucked in his pockets like the weather had anything to do with it.
John used to think he just got cold easily. It wasn’t exactly uncommon— 1x1 had a particular aversion to snow, after all— and most public places blasted their air conditioning like they were trying to preserve something. It made enough sense. That’s what John had told himself, at least…
Until today.
They had ended up in some random aisle neither of them cared much about, John walking a few steps ahead and skimming over the shelves out of habit more than interest. He liked looking, that was all. Sometimes it was about the packaging, or reading the back of something he already knew he didn’t want— he just did it.
1x1 followed just behind, eyes narrowed slightly as he glanced around, clearly unamused with whatever John had dragged him into.
“This would literally kill a Victorian child,” John murmured, reading the nutrition facts on something that looked dangerously artificial.
1x1 stood beside him for a few seconds longer, unmoving. His gaze flicked toward the product labels once, then away. Without saying a word, he turned and walked off like he had something more important to do.
John looked up when he noticed the absence. His hand lingered on the box as his brows lifted slightly— not in concern, exactly. 1x1 could handle himself anywhere. It was more that fond, slightly puzzled look he always got when the other man slipped away without warning.
He exhaled softly through his nose, let the box fall back into place with a faint clack, and idly straightened his orange vest. It had become a habit by now— brushing invisible dust off the front, tugging the edges neat— something to do with his hands while he glanced down the aisle.
And then he saw him.
A few rows down stood 1x1, not looking at anything in particular. His fingers hovered near one of the displays, brushing over a small, brightly colored box near the edge. And then, in one seamless motion, he palmed a cartridge of what looked like candy and slipped it cleanly into his coat pocket.
John blinked. His mouth parted a little— not quite in shock, more like the slow realization that… he had really just done that. Effortlessly, too.
He stayed frozen for a moment, still processing, as 1x1 turned— and to his surprise— smiled at him. Casually, as if nothing had happened at all. Then, with no particular urgency, he started making his way right back to John like he hadn’t just stolen something in plain sight.
“What’s wrong, Doe? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” 1x1 hummed brightly, slipping an arm around John’s shoulder like they were two friends going out for drinks or something.
John leaned slightly away, muttering under his breath. “Dude. We can pay for that, y’know? Even if nobody noticed, the scanners near the exit are gonna detect whatever the hell you stole.”
“Hey hey, stole is a pretty harsh word,” 1x1 said, tapping two fingers lightly against John’s chest. “I don’t think it’s my fault prices are basically theft themselves.”
“We’re not even in a bad financial situation!” John snapped, his voice a little louder than he meant.
A few heads turned from the far end of the aisle. One man, accompanied by his red-looking hellspawn of a child, lingered a second too long— until 1x1 glanced their way, entirely unfazed. The two quickly scurried along.
“Weird… Whatever, come on. I have to use the restroom,” 1x1 said suddenly, already changing topics as he grabbed John’s wrist and started pulling him along.
John barely managed a protest, stumbling a little as 1x1 steered them effortlessly through the store. “You— this is not the time—!”
“It’s never the time, John,” 1x1 replied, tone airy, almost melodic as they rounded the corner toward the restrooms. The door creaked open under 1x1’s hand, and without pause, he led them both straight into the last stall.
1x1 let go of his wrist only when the door shut behind them, that same smug expression still etched into his face.
“You’re so—” John started, but cut himself off with a sigh, pressing the heel of his palm to his forehead.
“What? Smart? Morally complex? Efficient?” 1x1 offered, reaching back into his coat pocket to retrieve the item he’d stolen.
“Ridiculous…”
1x1 tore off the clear plastic seal around the small container before picking at the wrapper that held the barcode, peeling it away and letting it flutter to the tiled floor. “No one will bat an eye,” he said proudly, then popped the lid open and tossed one of the sour, sphere-shaped candies into his mouth.
He stepped forward, closing the gap between them in a few easy strides. Both hands lifted to cradle John’s face, thumbs brushing along his cheekbones before suddenly tugging him down into an impatient kiss.
John let out a surprised sound, caught off guard, but it was quickly swallowed as 1x1 pressed in harder. The candy passed between them, their mouths parting just enough to let it slip past John’s tongue. 1x1 barely gave him time to react before licking into the heat of his mouth, tasting the sweetness from the other. God— if he was this needy, he really could’ve just said something.
John winced faintly at the sourness but didn’t pull away, instead curling one hand into the back of 1x1’s coat and the other up to his nape, deepening the kiss in a heartbeat.
It was basically a challenge to see who would pull back first— John was never a quitter, and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t pleased with how things turned out. Still, he couldn’t help but wonder just how long 1x1 had been doing this behind his back. Not that it really mattered, anyway.
1x1’s lips lingered just a second longer, like he was debating whether to take it further— then, with a low breath, he pulled away, wiping a bit of drool from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.
“Not bad,” he muttered, almost to himself, before giving the other man a light tap to the chest in satisfaction.
John exhaled slowly, barely holding back a stunned breath of laughter as he leaned back against the stall door, one hand dragging through his hair. “You’re actually insane,” he mumbled, a grin tugging at the edge of his lips despite everything.
1x1 just shrugged, clearly unbothered as he straightened his coat. “You liked it though. Let’s get out of here—”
The two finally stepped out of the stall together, the lights buzzing softly overhead. They barely made it three steps before locking eyes with someone else in the restroom— a young man standing at the sink, yellow curls poking out from under a red visor, his red uniform clashing against the sterile white tiles. He was halfway through drying his hands, earbuds still in, but his stare lingered a second too long.
He glanced between them, blinked, then turned away and briskly walked out of the bathroom without a word.
“…Next time, can you pick a better place for your weird ideas?”