Chapter Text
I loved you, and it cost me everything.
It started as a pair of handcuffs, broken, one on each arm. Vi had walked into the tattoo parlor on a whim and asked for the first thing that popped into her head. She didn’t think too hard about the symbolism. It was a means to an end. She had been wallowing in self-pity and self-loathing, and she knew that sitting still, breathing, and enduring the pain of a tattoo would clear her mind.
Vi had compromised her morals for Caitlyn's mission of vengeance, but in the end she had stepped between Caitlyn and Powder - Jinx - to protect an innocent child from getting caught in the crossfire. Caitlyn, furious, had slammed the butt of her rifle into Vi’s stomach before walking out of her life forever.
How could you leave me like that? After everything I’ve sacrificed for you…
Caitlyn had made sure Vi was well compensated for working as an enforcer, but Vi saw it as blood money for spewing toxic gas into the already-toxic Undercity air. There was an irrational part of Vi that believed she could alleviate some of her guilt by blowing the money as fast as possible. So she added gears, bolts, wires, and puffs of steam, until she had two full sleeves. Today she was sitting for a back piece.
After day one, the tattoo artist, Gert, had given up trying to make small talk with Vi, who only bothered to respond in one-word sentences or grunts of acknowledgement. Death metal blared through the speakers and the buzzing needle scraped across her back as the hours passed. Every time Gert wiped away droplets of blood pooling in the wake of her needle, it felt like she was dragging sandpaper across an open wound. That was the most painful part of the ordeal, but Vi welcomed it. She gritted her teeth, endured, and dissociated.
By the time it was over, the last of her blood money was spent and her mind was mercifully quiet. She made her way back to her shit-hole apartment and flopped facedown on her mattress. It wouldn’t be long before she would either have to find a job or get evicted. But that was a problem for future Vi. Tonight her only goal was to drink herself into a dreamless sleep, so she dug her flask of whisky out from under her pillow and took a long swig.
I hate myself for missing you.
Despite her best efforts, she dreamt of Caitlyn, just as she had every night since Caitlyn had left her broken and sobbing. Most of her dreams were a replay of that moment with variations of what was said and how they fought. Sometimes Caitlyn swung the rifle at her face. Sometimes she smashed it into her knee. One time she took aim and shot her through the heart. But tonight was different. Resigned, Caitlyn simply looked her in the eyes and said, “You knew I had the shot. It was me or Jinx, and you made your choice,” before calmly walking out.
–
“It’s just you and me in here, right kid?” asked Jinx as she walked down the Undercity alleyway with the little girl on her right and Silco on her left.
The little girl grabbed her hand and nodded.
“Okay…“ said Jinx, deflated, “thanks.” She tousled the little girl's curly mop of hair affectionately.
Jinx could see ghosts. Specifically, ghosts of people she had killed. At least that’s what she told herself. She liked that explanation better than the alternative. Mylo and Claggor had haunted her for years, and she had grown accustomed to their bad company. Silco was a new addition, sometimes appearing by her side, but never speaking to her. She wasn’t used to it, and sometimes it fooled her into thinking he was still alive.
The grief of it all had been killing her until this little girl literally fell into her life. No family, no place to call home, and no one to look out for her except Jinx. With newfound purpose, Jinx had managed to pull herself together. She started eating every day, a side-effect of making sure the kid didn’t go hungry. She invented games for them to play together, and she started teaching the little girl how to tinker with mechanical toys. The little girl adored her, and Jinx began to see glimpses of herself through the kid’s eyes. Maybe Jinx wasn’t all bad.
“Anyway,” said Jinx, filling the silence because the little girl never spoke, “let’s get back to finding you a name. I’m sick of calling you ‘kid’.” She wondered if the kid ever had a name, or if she remembered what it was. They had been going through the alphabet letter by letter. Jinx would suggest a few names, and the little girl would make funny faces at her until they both started laughing and gave up.
“I think we’re on H, so how about … Harley?”
The little girl chuckled, then vigorously shook her head.
“Harmony?”
The little girl rolled her eyes.
“Jeez, tough crowd. What about… okay, I got it … Henriatta?”
The little girl raised her eyebrows in mock disappointment and let out an exaggerated sigh.
“Hmm.. maybe ‘H’ ain’t it. Let’s try ‘I’. What if we go with … Iris?” Jinx was caught off guard by her own suggestion.
Violet and Iris
She shuddered as her mind made the connection, tearing up for a split-second.
The little girl seemed to pick up on it, and smiled at Jinx before gently shaking her head at the suggestion.
“Phew, that was a close one,” said Jinx, coping with humor as always. “Next up we have… Isha?
The little girl’s eyes widened as a smile spread across her face.
“You like ‘Isha’?”
Her smile turned into a grin and she flapped her arms excitedly.
“Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!” said Jinx in her best announcer voice. “Look out world, here comes Jinx and Isha!”
Isha gave a round of applause before jumping into Jinx’s arms for a hug.