Chapter Text
[Phoebe's POV]
I woke to sunlight streaming through the curtains, a golden warmth that painted the dormitory in hues of honey and blush. For a few stolen seconds, I let myself pretend. That I was just another student. That the ache in my chest didn’t stretch across decades. That the people I loved weren’t walking the castle halls unaware of who I truly was.
Then the illusion cracked.
I sat up, the silk of the borrowed sheets tangled around my legs, and pressed my palms into my eyes. James Potter. Lily Evans. Remus Lupin. Alive. Laughing. Breathing. And Sirius... somewhere in the castle, too close and too unfamiliar.
Avoiding him was both instinct and survival. I couldn't risk the bond flaring again, not while I was so raw, so painfully aware of everything I'd lost. And if he looked at me too long—if he asked the wrong questions, if he saw too much —I'd break.
But the others... I couldn't stay away.
It started with James.
I had no plan, really. Just a hope. A soft, aching desire to be near him, even if he didn’t know he was my father.
He was magnetic, drawing people into his orbit without effort. He held court at breakfast, his laughter rich and loud, always with a hand gesture or dramatic flair to punctuate a punchline. And yet he noticed people. Noticed me.
He scooted over on the bench one morning. "Oy, Alden. You always look like you're about to bolt. Sit. Eat. We don't bite. Much."
I blinked, mid-step, clutching a mug of tea like a lifeline.
Lily rolled her eyes. "Ignore him. He thinks he's charming."
"I am charming," James said with mock offense, nudging over a plate of toast toward me.
I sat.
And just like that, I became a part of their mornings. Not deeply, not fully. But James always had a joke for me. Lily offered quiet, perceptive questions. Remus watched, ever thoughtful. And Sirius...
I didn't look at him. Not if I could help it.
Remus, though... he was harder to avoid.
He had a way of looking at people that stripped them bare. Not cruelly, not invasively—but with a quiet patience that saw truth like reflections in water.
"You're good with magical theory," he said after one class. "I saw how you rewrote the Arithmantic translation. Clean, efficient."
I shrugged, unsure how to respond to praise that felt like it belonged to another version of me. "I had good teachers."
He nodded slowly, his gaze flicking to my hand where it gripped my wand.
"You duel like someone who's survived more than schoolyard spats."
My fingers tensed.
He didn’t press. Just walked with me in silence. That, more than anything, earned my reluctant trust.
Every interaction with James, with Lily, with Remus, deepened the ache in my chest. It wasn’t just longing. It was mourning in reverse . Watching their lives before I existed. Before war made them legends.
Lily tucked a lock of hair behind my ear once and said, "You remind me of someone, but I can't place it."
I bit back tears. "Maybe we knew each other in a past life."
She smiled. "Maybe."
I wanted so badly to belong. Not just as Phoebe Alden, mysterious transfer student. But as their daughter . Their sister. Their friend.
I wanted James to pull me into a hug and call me trouble. I wanted Lily to braid my hair and give me advice. I wanted Remus to lend me books and understand without asking.
Instead, I watched from the edges. Drank in every second. Cherished every scrap of attention.
But Sirius... he complicated everything.
I avoided eye contact. Changed seats. Walked slower or faster depending on his pace. Made excuses to skip study hours if he was around.
He noticed.
Of course he did.
"You're avoiding me," he said flatly one night as we left a lecture hall.
I blinked. "I'm not."
He arched a brow. "Alden, you literally turned around and pretended to study a tapestry when I walked into the common room yesterday. It was a troll eating a unicorn. You stared for ten minutes ."
I flushed. "I like... tapestries."
He gave a half-smile, but there was something else there. A flicker of hurt? Or suspicion? Or worse— recognition .
"You're weird," he said finally.
I mustered a smirk. "Takes one to know one."
James started calling me "Alden the Enigma."
"You show up out of nowhere, duel like a curse-breaker, and make Sirius go all moody. You're either a secret agent or a time traveler."
I choked on my pumpkin juice.
Remus raised an eyebrow. "James."
"What? I'm kidding . Mostly."
Lily rolled her eyes. "You read too many comics."
But James leaned in and smiled at me, warm and bright. "Whatever your deal is, Alden... I'm glad you're here."
And that’s when I knew I was in trouble.
Because even if I succeeded in changing the future...
I’d still have to leave them all over again.
Even him.
Especially him.
And it was already starting to feel impossible.
Scary. I have to leave before I get attached.
More. Attached More.