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Chapter Text

He could feel his cheeks burn and his heart pulsing faster than usual. He approaches the older man whom he admires and loves. For a moment, the words couldn't get out of his mouth, not until the other man looks him in the eyes.

“That was... Intense, wasn't it?” Ivan speaks. His mind racing back to the kiss scene they recently filmed, there was a lot of tension, too much that it felt fake.

“Hm?” Till responds, staring up at the younger man. “What? Oh, I guess it was..” Till adds, his attention moving to remove the cap off a bottle of water.

“I felt.. more than that” Ivan says.

Till paused, his hands froze still in place as Ivan's words sink in. He blinked, before staring back up at Ivan. “Well, it's our job. To act, and put emotion in it, otherwise the acting would feel bland.” Till says.

“...Right.. Just our job” Ivan mutters. He felt like he was wrong, but he didn't want to lose hope yet.

“What are you trying to say, Ivan?” Till questions.

“I'm saying that I.. meant every single word in that scene.” Ivan admits. He knows about the danger of falling in love during acting, he's not stupid.

“...Ivan, you know we can't—”

“I know that, I'm not stupid. But why not? We were saying stuff that we probably didn't have the guts to say on-camera, and it felt real. Like you meant every word.” Ivan interrupts Till.

“For God's sake, that's our job, Ivan. You're letting the script get to you, you have to accept that it's just acting.” Till responds.

“No, I'm letting YOU get to me. And you're acting like none of it meant anything—”

“Because it doesn't mean anything, for God's sake!” Till turns around to face Ivan. “We're actors. That's our job. To act, and how to differentiate between reality and our roles.” Till says.

Tears pricked at the corner of Ivan's eyes, ready to fall at any given moment. “You looked me in the eyes and told me you'd do anything for me. We were at a fan meet, Sunbae, we weren't filming a scene.” Ivan says, still clutching onto that hope of his feelings for his idol would be reciprocated.

Till sighs. “That was just fan service, Ivan.” Till says.

“It didn't seem like that in the way you said it to me.” Ivan responds.

Till blinks, a moment of silence between the two actors. “We can't do this. You're confusing our role with reality.” Till says.

“No, I'm not! I'm just the only one who was brave enough to admit it was real.” Ivan says.

“... Then I'm sorry. It doesn't mean anything, I was just doing my job.” Till says before walking away, leaving Ivan alone.

Tears finally fall as Till walks away, leaving Ivan alone with his thoughts and himself.

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Chapter Text

Till walks through the empty hallway before pausing briefly.

'Ivan... I should talk to him.'

He finds his way to Ivan's dressing room. His mind wandering to their conversation yesterday, and if he went too far with his words.

He scans the room, looking for Ivan. Usually, Ivan would be in his dressing room either talking with their co-actor, Luka, or singing his heart out for no reason. Except, he's not in the room...

'That's weird, he's not here..'

He scans the room once again, his eyes drawing attention towards a written paper on the makeup table.

'Huh?.. What's that?'

He walks towards the makeup table and grabs the paper.

'A letter?'

He starts to read on what's provided on the paper.

'What is this.. 'Transfer approved'? What?..'

His eyes widen as he realizes what the words indicate. To his dismay, Ivan has unfortunately... Transferred to another entertainment company right before his contract ended.

“What the fuck?” Till says without thinking. For some reason, he felt a strange mix of emotions: confusion, sadness, and disappointment. He set the paper down and turns around before walking away, heading towards Ivan's manager, previous manager now.

“Where's Ivan?” Till questions, not wasting the time and getting straight to the point.

Ivan's manager, who was drinking coffee, set the coffee mug down on the table and stares at Till.

“He got transferred to another entertainment. They requested him last minute and Ivan agreed.” He says, pausing before adding, “You didn't know?”

Till could feel his heart ache a little at the confirmation that Ivan is... gone, in a way.

“...Why didn't he say anything?” Till says, pausing for a moment before continuing, ”Does everybody know about this?”

Ivan's manager sighs and crosses his arms. “Yes. He didn't tell you? And It isn't a big deal, his contract was ending anyway.” He says.

“..You're not answering my question. But, why didn't he just renew his contract instead?” Till says, his mind racing of the possibility that his words were the reason Ivan accepted the offer.

Ivan's manager thinks in silence for a moment, before responding. “I don't know, Till. Why don't you ask him yourself?” Ivan's manager says.

Till blinks before looking away. “We're not on...good terms.” Till says, his voice lowering a little.

Ivan's manager was surprised, especially since Ivan has always admired Till and always found a way to make everything about Till. “Eh?..huh..maybe that's the reason why he didn't tell you?” Ivan's manager says. “..Figure it out yourself, Till. I was also surprised that he didn't renew his contract” Ivan's manager adds, before walking away.

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In the bathroom, Till has just recently taken a bath. As he's drying himself off, a thought came to his mind.

'Should I message him?'

He grabs his phone from the bathroom countertop and turns it on, before pausing for a moment. He slightly shakes his head and types in: Ivan, before deleting the text.

He pauses for a moment again before typing in: I didn't mean what I said, before deleting the text yet again.

He pauses again, a little longer this time before typing in: I didn't want it to end like that, I just didn't want to admit my feeling for, before deleting the text again..

He pauses again, a little longer than last time before typing in: Come back to me, before accidentally hitting send.

His eyes widen and his body froze.

“Shit.” He says.

_____________________

Ivan was just having a conversation alone with Luka. He listened intently on what Luka was saying, nothing interrupted them until a notification sound came from Ivan's phone. They both blink as their attention was caught by the sound.

“Wait a second..” Ivan says, grabbing his phone out of his pocket. He turns his phone on, to see a message from... Till.

'Eh?'

He was surprised reading Till's message: Come back to me

“Who is it?” Luka asks, curious.

Ivan blinks. “Nobody.” He says as he turns his phone off and inserts it in his pocket before continuing the conversation between them.

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Chapter Text

Till looked at the screen in front of him in silence. A sigh following from the teal-haired man before turning his phone off.

‘Left on read, huh?’

Till couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment and loneliness. He shook his head, trying to dismiss his 'unwanted' feelings.

He dried his hair using a hair dryer, looking at his reflection in the mirror.

‘It's no big deal..If he doesn't want to talk to me, it's his choice...’

Despite his thoughts, he was slightly frowning. He took a deep breath before changing into comfortable sleepwear.

... He couldn't sleep. He's been changing sleeping positions every 3 minutes, yet he can't sleep. When he closes his eyes, he could see Ivan's smile, his fang, his eyes, his....

‘Ugh...What's wrong with me..Ivan doesn't need me anymore, why am I...’

He paused. He suddenly wondered what Ivan might be doing right now. Ivan could be happy, talking with his other friends, not needing Till.

'Maybe I should ask Luka?'

He turned his phone on and texted Luka. He wishes well for Ivan, though he can't help but dislike the fact Ivan's not following him around anymore.

Luka

Hey, do you know what Ivan's doing?  

     Oh. He's with me.

     We're just talking. Why?

Oh.  

Nothing. 

      Ok.

Bye.  

Till turned his phone off. That did not help him sleep. He overthinks, what if Ivan starts following Luka around instead?

'So he's talking to Luka....But not me?'

Till just stared at the ceiling in silence for 15 minutes. He sighed.

'... I'm being stupid.'

He tried to convince himself. He then forced himself to sleep despite Ivan still lingering in his mind...He drifts off to sleep...

“Am I doing the right thing?” Ivan asked Luka. He's fidgeting his fingers nervously, guilt washing him over.

Luka stared at him in silence, taking his time to respond. He shrugged. “For you, yes. For Till, nope” Luka says.

Ivan blinked, he's slightly frowning. “Are you saying I'm hurting him?.. I mean, it's not like he likes me back.” Ivan says. Despite his words, he's still clutching onto that hope that his senior likes him back.

Luka sighed before giving Ivan a pat on the shoulder. “Till is the only one who knows the answer to that question. So if you're curious, you could go ask Till.” Luka says. He nodded slightly before standing up and walking away.

Ivan opened his mouth before closing it. How could he? Isn't that kind of awkward?

'Ask Till? No way... He's not going to listen because I ignored him..! Plus, he doesn't even like me back anyway!'

Ivan then stared at his phone screen, the message that Till accidentally sent. He couldn't help but smile a little.

Sunbae💖

    Come back to me.

'It's probably nothing...'

Ivan's smile fades as he sets his phone down with a sigh.