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"Captain, Captain Scrap wait, please wait!" Gunnie called as he stumbled his way out of the Acme Ashmun hospital and repair shop and out onto the busy street of the Acme First Stop Space port.
It was a pretty big port, all things considered, and one that almost every ship had to stop by eventually if they were anywhere near this section of the galaxy. It had ship repairs, fuel for both ship and people, entertainment, and- thankfully- health and cyborg services. Gunnie was almost certain that they only reason his ship captain had ordered an ambulance for him was because they were so close by already and were planning to stop at the port next anyhow.
Well, ex-captain, if what Dan Scrap had just told him in the hospital room had been true.
"Mr. Scrap, please, " Gunnie continued to plead as he stumbled after the rapidly retreating figure of his previous boss. As Gunnie had no insurance or any way at all to pay for his medical bills they had basically reconstructed him, made sure he was breathing and could feel all of his new body, and then shoved him out the door without so much as a test run.
Though maybe that had been a blessing in disguise. The quick turn around had given Gunnie enough time to be handed the notice of termination by his captain before the man had made it to the other side of the solar system.
Which would have stranded Gunnie. Alone. In a place he'd never been, up to his ears in debt, with no direction and barely a body.
Did he even have ears anymore? He hadn't even had time to look in a mirror yet.
"Dan wait! "
This, or maybe just the realization that he wasn't about to lose Gunnie anytime soon, made Captain Dan Scrap finally halt in his tracks.
Gunnie ran smack into his back, unable to fully control his new limbs yet or figure out what kind of momentum they needed to operate. His entire body was just gone. Except for his feet and his head, and not even all of that. The weight of his new eye made him over compensate and tilt his head too far. It would have surely given him a neck cramp if there were any muscles left to form into knots.
Oh, fuck, he had had a tattoo on his shoulder blade from one of the few times in college he had taken a risk and gotten adventurous. It had felt like a giant rebellion, even though he was certain his dads would have hardly commented on it if they'd seen it. No way to know now, damn it.
Though Dan turned around when Gunnie crashed into him he made no effort to help stabilize his prior crew member and, in fact, pulled away when Gunnie tried to latch onto his arm and keep himself from falling.
So he did fall. Embarrassingly he crumpled right there on the floor in front of the whole hospital front. At least he was certain all his nerve endings worked now. Ow.
"Son, it's not personal," Dan Scrap said, holding his hands up and continuing to not help as Gunnie awkwardly climbed to his feet and tried to regain his balance. His weight was all weird now. Heavy in some places and lighter in others. It was hard just standing up and he supposed he was lucky that Dan wasn't taking this opportunity to fully run from him. "It's just business, you see."
" B-b-business ?" Gunnie stuttered in disbelief, glaring up at the man that had gotten him into this mess in the first place. He would still have his original body if he'd never gotten on the Bad Call. "No, no, no, no. You- I- you're the one that told me the space walk was safe, you're the one who said you'd look out for me while I was a part of your crew, you're the one that convinced me not to get health insurance! Do you know how much debt I'm in right now?"
Dan shrugged, completely unapologetic at having ruined Gunnie's life. "A crap ton, yeah, which is why I'm ejecting you from my crew. I ain't having that heap of trouble following me around like a bad smell. Like I said, son. Business."
Gunnie threw his metallic arms in the air, smacking himself in the face as he miscalculated, and screeched, "You have to help me!"
"I brought you to the damn hospital," Dan barked, crossing his arms sourly and glaring down at the smaller man, "what more do you want?"
"Not to be stranded in the middle of nowhere, " Gunnie demanded, gesturing around them to indicate said middle of nowhere, "look I get it, okay? I get that I'm- I'm a liability now. I don't have enough money to pay Acme Ashmun so I definitely don't have money to pay you anymore. But- but- come on. You can't leave me here just like that. You have to take me home or to a real planet at least."
Dan stared at him for a long, long moment, taking in Gunnie's situation and surely evaluating the role he had played in getting him here.
"Nope, not my problem," Dan Scrap said with a shrug, turning away and continuing his trek to his ship.
"Wait wait wait wait." Gunnie scrambled around to stand in front of him again, putting his robotic hands on his chest to stop him from moving. "At least hook me up with a contact! I don't know anyone on this side of the galaxy. Certainly there's someone you could introduce me to so I don't end up homeless by the end of the cycle."
Dan sighed, annoyed but also resigned and Gunnie took that as a very tiny victory. Goodness knew he needed as many of those as he could get right now.
"Fine, fine," Dan said, clicking his tongue and rubbing his chin with his hand, "there just might be one unlucky bastard I hate enough to unload you onto. Pretty sure he's at port as well. And if he's here then there's only one place he'll be here."
Choosing to ignore the very blatant insult to his person, Gunnie just nodded rapidly. "Thank you, thank you. Something's better than nothing. You know I knew... I knew you were a good man."
"Gunthrie?" Dan said with a snort. "Shut the fuck up before I dump you in a scrap heap instead."
"...yes sir."
***
It did not surprise Gunnie at all that Dan lead him to a bar. Disappointing, yes, but hardly surprising that whoever the crooked captain's contact was would be spending their time off ship at a place like this. The Last Stop Bar was rowdy and loud and Gunnie kept close to Dan just so none of the people rushing around and pushing each other would bowl him over.
Dan headed straight for the bar top like this was a prearranged meeting and smiled widely when he caught sight of two people off to the edge, keeping to themselves and barely even each other.
One was a very large man with muscles for days and sunglasses perched on top of his head, pinning his long hair out of his eyes. He wasn't drinking but instead was scanning the crowd and drumming his fingers on his legs. Not in a nervous way but more of a bored one, like he was itching for something to do. The other man sat hunched over his own drink, nursing it like it was the only liquid left in the world. He was of a slimmer build- though still bigger than Gunnie- with salt and pepper hair and a bushy moustache.
"Well if it ain't Norman Takimori," Dan called when he was close enough, causing the moustache man to groan and wearily glance up, "I thought I'd find your sorry ass here."
The man, Norman Takimori, rolled his eyes and flicked two fingers at Dan in a gesture Gunnie couldn't tell if was a greeting or a dismissal. "Barry, fucking kill this guy for me."
"Can do, Skipper." The bigger guy instantly stood up and completely dwarfed everyone else in the room, looming over Dan Scrap while cracking his neck and pulling back his giant shoulders.
Gunnie squaked, feeling very much like a mouse that had just been served up on a platter to a lion.
"Don't actually do that you fucking moron," Norman interrupted before the giant of a man could start swinging. Or shooting. Gunnie spied a very large gun resting on the side of Barry's bar stool. Either this place didn't have an anti gun policy or they just hadn't thought it wise to argue with the imposing man.
Norman swatted his... bodyguard on the bicep and at least stood up straight now. "Sit down you big oof. I would tell you to use your brain for once but I don't think you've even got one of those."
Barry stood ridged as he nodded once. "Yes, sir. Sorry, Skipper." But when he sat back down Gunnie could detect a faint flush in his cheeks.
Mr. Takimori rolled his eyes again and fully faced Dan. "Clones. Can't teach them fucking anything, the morons."
That seemed pretty rude to Gunnie, and awfully discriminatory, but since he did not think Dan would introduce him to another person should be piss off this guy he chose to keep his mouth shut.
Besides, Dan just laughed like this was all a big joke between friends and slapped Norman on the shoulder. "Still your usual delightful self, I see. How you been, Norm? Business going well?"
"Cut the crap, Dan," Norman snarled, shrugging his hand off, "no way you'd ever willingly bother me unless you wanted something. So what do you want?" He spotted Gunnie, seemingly for the first time, and jerked his stubbled chin at him. "Who's the kid?"
Gunnie blinked and stood up a little straighter. Or at least tried to, it was hard not to shrink under Norman's cold glare. "I- I'm not- I'm definitely too old to be considered a-"
"This here is Gunthrie Miggles-Rashbax," Dan cut him off, shoving Gunnie forward slightly so he tripped over his own feet and would have crashed into the ground had Barry not struck out a hand and caught him. Neither the Captain nor the 'skipper' seemed to notice as Dan kept on talking. "He was a member of my ship, off to see the big wide galaxy all the Bad Call, but he got into a, ah, little accident and can't seem to make his payments anymore. But because I'm such a kind and generous man- and I know you just had another crew member quit- I thought I'd make a match and let you offer him a job on your ship."
Gunnie leaned up towards the clone and whispered quietly enough so the other two couldn't hear, "why did the last member quit?" If it was because they also couldn't make some ridiculous payment, even while working, then Gunnie would quickly be out of both luck and hope.
Thankfully, Barry leaned down next to him and whispered back. "The Skipper offered to trade him to some pirates in exchange for safe passage. It was totally a bluff the whole time, I'm pretty sure, totally, but it scared the dude so bad he didn't even wait for us to pull into port before getting on an escape pod and hightailing it out of here."
Gunnie gulped. While it didn't seem like the ex crew member had been kicked off or anything that story... certainly didn't shed a good light on this potential employment opportunity.
"My ship is a carefully run establishment," Norman spat at Dan, not even giving Gunnie a second glance, "I don't take useless hunks of a charity case just cause their daddy stopped funding their sight seeing tour."
Dan shrugged and tugged on his woolly cap in a semblance of a hat tip. "Welp, can't say I didn't try. Good luck, son. Pleasure as always, Norman."
"Eat a slug," Norman replied, flipping Dan off and turning back to his drink.
Gunnie glanced rapidly between the two of them. His old captain walking away and his potential new one already completely dismissing him. He was certain that Dan had meant it when he said he was only doing this much because it was decently convenient and would not be offering Gunnie any other help. He'd probably do everything in his power to shake Gunnie off now if he followed him.
Which meant the only option was Norman Takimori.
Gunnie turned to the sour face man and tried to stand as tall as possible. The clone gave him an encouraging thumbs up. Which was at least something, and pretty nice of him. "Uh, sir, I'm sorry but your initial assessment of me is completely incorrect."
Norman snorted and mumbled something into his beer but did cock his head in Gunnie's direction. "Yeah? And how do you figure. Cause I'll let you know I'm an excellent judge of character."
Uphill battle most definitely but Gunnie had fought many of those before. This was just like defending his thesis. He could do it no sweat.
Could he sweat? It might be useful as a cooling system for the mechanical parts. If not literal sweat then something with the same functions at least. When he got a moment to himself he really needed to tinker around with this new body.
"Well sir you called me a 'useless charity case' and that's just not true. I can be useful in a lot of ways. I have doctorates in chemistry, computer science, mechanical engineering, electrical engineering, complex system science-"
"What the fuck is your point?" Norman interrupted, eye twitching in clear annoyance, "do I look like I'm the type of guy impressed because a kid went to school for too many years? All I'm hearing is you don't have any work experience whatsoever. So, yeah, taking you on would be a charity case."
Gunnie faltered slightly but forged ahead after a glance to Barry, who only shrugged helplessly. "My point is that you should care because I know how to repair and maintain the computer systems on a ship. That's a valuable skill since software is a lot harder to fix than hardware and a lot harder to guesstimate your way to success if you don't know what you're looking at."
Norman was still glaring but he was also still paying attention. He hadn't gone back to his drink or ordered Barry to throw Gunnie out of the bar. He was just staring at him, waiting for him to say more.
Speaking of Barry, the clone leaned in at that moment, his big frame immediately taking up space and almost knocking his captain's glass over. "Do you know how to work with androids? Like, repair them and stuff? Cause Syd's got this kinda stiff joint that has been bugging her for ages and banging it against the wall has only made it worse so, like, that would be sweet if you could help her out."
Gunnie nodded rapidly, jumping on the lifeline that was just thrown to him. "Yes! Yes, I can do robotics, easy. I'd love to help your friend."
Norman sucked on his teeth. "I don't know if I want to pay just for the bot to have a babysitter."
Final push, the last card Gunnie had to play. If this didn't work then he'd be wandering around until some junker tore him apart for scrap metal. "I can also work out the calculations for a hyper space jump. By hand."
The two other men stared at him. Barry with a just kind of confused grimace, like he wasn't exactly sure what Gunnie was talking about, but Norman with the perfect blankness of a man that was thinking many things very quickly and wanted none of them to show on his face.
He leaned back in his stool and scratched at his stubble, finally fixing Gunnie with something that was almost interest. "How fast?"
"Fifteen minutes if I'm double and triple checking my work. That kind of complex mathematics can have pretty devastating effects if not properly rendered so I wouldn't ever want-"
"Fastest time you could pull it off," Norman demanded, "no double checking, no lollygagging. You're being shot at and we have to jump, how long would I need to wait?"
Gunnie cocked his head- too far the eye was still way heavier than he expected- and thought about it. After a moment he admitted, "less than a minute, sir. If there was that kind of time crunch."
Norman smiled and Gunnie found he very much did not like that smile. "Perfect. You know I think there just might be a place for you aboard the Red Hot. Supposen you're not looking to get paid too handsomely?"
Gunnie hesitated at that. He had only been able to glance at his medical bills but even that had been enough to tell him it wouldn't be easy to even keep up with, let alone pay off.
But, well, it was either this money or no money.
"I'll take a base starting pay," he said, smiling in a way he hoped didn't come off as too desperate nor too greedy.
Norman grinned back and reached out a hand, clasping Gunnie's metal one in his gloved. "Well then, Gunith or whatever, I'd say you got yourself a new gig."
"Uh, it's Gunthrie," Gunnie corrected, wincing a bit at the force of the handshake. Why weren't metal hands tougher than his old ones? "But you can call me Gunnie."
"I'll call you whatever the hell I want," his new captain said flatly, "anything else I need to know before we head back to the ship."
"I, uh, mm," Gunnie stumbled, trying to think of how much would be appropriate to reveal at the moment. It would probably be worse if he kept his lack of insurance a secret, wouldn't it? Norman seemed like the type of guy to send someone out of an airlock for lying to his face. "I am, sort of, renting this body? That doesn't effect you at all! Of course not, of course not. But, just... I will need to send credits to Ashmun regularly so I can... breathe."
The pleased expression on Norman's face dissapeared and he pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation. "Fucking Scrap. I knew there'd be some kind of a catch."
"Aw come on, Skipper," Barry instantly pipped up, standing from his chair to move around Gunnie and place two giant hands on his shoulders, "you already said you'd take him on! Don't back out of your word now. Besides, we do still need a nerd type to do all the nerd shit. That one toilet has been, like, super clogged since the other guy left. And I know you don't like hiring gig workers."
Barry seemed a bit confused on just where Gunnie's areas of expertise laid but if it was helping his case... "I can unclog a toilet. Especially if it's an issue with the hydraulic pump system."
Norman groaned and tilted his head back dramatically. "Fine, fine, whatever. You can stay. But you better make sure you're staying on top of your bills. If a bounty hunter comes looking for those parts I'm certainly not gonna stand in his way." He downed the rest of his drink in one go and stalked away from the bar. "Let's go. I'm sick of this dump."
"Um," Gunnie called, stumbling to keep up with the two taller men, "wh- wh- what bounty hunters would those be?"
Norman didn't even acknowledge that he'd spoken but Barry at least held out a hand for a fist bump. Though he also ignored the question. "Welcome to the crew, dude. You're gonna totally love it."
Gunnie gave him and awkward grin and returned the bump. What had he just gotten himself into?