Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Noelle watched as Berdly set up a theatrical display of affection on Susie's desk. He had been shooting his shot every single day since they woke up to Susie and Kris lingering in the library, on the way to his shift with Ms.Boom he had rambled on and on about this elaborate plan to get her to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with him. Her favorite part of the plan was when he finally shut up, but he stayed true to his word; it was almost amusing how persistent he actually was. As everyday passed he upped the ante. Today he declared his affection by bringing in a card with a gaming pun on it and a bouquet of orange Lillie's and yellow carnations, ironic in a sort of twisted Victorian way, claiming that roses were too straightforward for the kind of charm he possessed. Noelle just watched, she was just getting to the point where she could talk to Susie without freaking out; there was no way she could even attempt to ask her out, so she let the sadness and anger stir inside her, never speaking a word of her crush to Berdly only giving him a fake smile as he stared proudly at the desk.

It wasn't too long before the rest of the class started filing in, taking their seats as Ms. Alphys wrote the lesson plan on the board. Shortly after the bell rang, the door opened once more. A familiar green sweater stood in the door frame, her favorite shade of purple stood not too far behind. Berdly's gaze followed them as they entered, all the way to the back of the classroom where they sat.

“Hey Noelle.” Susie said with a smile that made her heart melt.

“Hey Susie.” She said, returning the smile to her friend as the two kept walking.

Kris took their seat but immediately noticed that Susie did not. She stood, staring silently at her desk, expression unreadable behind those beautiful bangs of hers. Kris looked at Noelle with annoyance and confusion, she could only roll her eyes and shrug in response. Kris knew, they were the only one that knew besides her dad, and they prided themselves on using that information to their advantage as often as possible. She knew they were trying to help her, but more often than not it turned out disastrous. It wasn't any fault if there's just a fault of the fact that Noelle got in her head too much when she was around Susie. She really just wanted her to think she was cool. A sigh drew their attention back to their friend and they watched as she picked up the card and ripped it in half before throwing it away with the flowers, much to Berdly’s dismay.

“What's everyone looking at!” She didn't yell, but she said it with such a bite that everyone immediately returned to facing the board. Noelle noticed she hadn't been yelling as much, it honestly seemed like Susie was trying to be nicer, at least around her she was.

“G-Goodmorning everyone, today I have some exciting news. We're hosting a battle of the bands! It's open to both original and cover bands. You've got plenty of time to sign up, but uh, if y-you want to, the sheet is the, uh, hallway.” Ms.Alphys nervously chuckled as silence responded to her statement. “Right, well, um, let's just move on. Today we're going to be finishing the reading and we'll have a comprehension test next Friday, so just stay silent. please.”

Noelle had already finished the book and studied ten times over for the exam, so she let her mind wander as she found solace in an all too familiar snore. She thought of the girl behind her, the girl she had been crushing on for a long time. She thought of her toothy smile and how it always managed to make her heart flutter. They had talked a few times, when Kris was around, but Noelle could never invite her to hang out just the two of them, she didn't have the courage for that. Even so, she wanted to confess before the year was up, to tell her how highly she thought of her, how entranced she was by her laugh, how much she had thought of her since she gave her that candy cane pencil. She just wanted her attention, but at this rate Berdly would capture it before Noelle could even reach her hands out to try. Berdly was annoying, irritating, and a nuisance, but he was also kind and he tried his best. Those were both good qualities in a partner and she wouldn't be completely surprised if he was actually able to take Susie to the dance, after all he was much more forward and endearing than Noelle could ever hope to be. She sighed once again and placed her head in her palm, zoning out even more, letting time pass her by.

*bringgggg*

Noelle's head shot up at the sudden noise. Was it that late already, how long had she been lost in thought for. She stood up and placed all her belongings in her bag, which she slung over her shoulder, as she smiled at the purple flannel that dashed through the door, before turning around and saying goodbye to Kris who waved in return. She stepped out into the hallway and took a few steps towards the locker room before she felt someone grab her wrist and yank her towards them.

"Wait who the hell!" She felt a finger upon her lips, kne that silenced her yelling, she had no time to process what had just happened, so she stared into the darkness as she waited for her eyes to adjust. As she blinked she could make out the silhouette of a cat. With a few more blinks she realized she was staring at the familiar face of her friend who stood merely inches away, much to her relief. The pink in her hair reflected what little light was seeping into the room from under the crack in the doorway.

“So, uh, why are we in the supply closet?” she asked.

“Because. Battle of the Bands.”

“Okayyyy?”

“You, sing. I, play” Noelle was taken aback. She loved to sing, but she only ever sang in church.

“Oh Catti, I'd love to but, yaknow. Stage fright.” She said that last part quietly, her voice dying with every syllable.

“You'll. Be fine.” Catti responded.

“Uhm, I don't know.”

“Please?” Noelle could barely see her friend's face but she recognized that tone. She was excited.

“Fine.” Noelle said with a sigh. “But we've got to practice. I'm not gonna make a fool of myself in front of the whole school.”

“Town.”

“Hm?”

“It's the. Whole town.”

“What.” Noelle said in disbelief. “I can't do that, Catti. Classmates are different from parents, plus I have a very busy schedule, and my mom. I don't know ow if she'd-”

“Too late,” Catti said, cutting off her friend's rant.

“What do you mean?”

‘Already signed up.” Noelle's jaw dropped.

“You're joking?”

“No.”

“Oh.” Noelle just stared at the floor for a while.

“We'll practice. At my house. Every Tuesday.”

“Why Tuesday?”

“No job, no church.”

“I still have practice.” Noelle hoped this would get her out of this.

“Season ends. Next week.” Catti responded simply.

“H-how do you know that?”

“Jockington.”

“Of course.” Noelle responded, defeated. “Fine Catti. What are we gonna play?”

“Up to you. Make a Playlist. We'll practice every song. You have a week.” With that she made her exit, leaving Noelle in the dark.

“What. The. Hell.” Noelle muttered as she stared at the door. She shook her head and headed out of the closet towards the locker room, completely confused.

I have a week? I have to compile a whole Playlist before Wednesday. She thought to herself as she groaned, listing to her dismay echo off the lockers surrounding her.

Running was therapeutic for her. It made all the worries go away. She could focus on her time, her strides, her distance. She could control everything when she was on that track. No berating from her mom, no images of a 2 year long crush, no worrying about her grades. Just her, the wind, and the steady thumping of her hooves against the ground. The only thing she loved more than running was music, and coach loved to blare music from the speakers during practice. She stared at the white line in front of her and began slowing down as she crossed it.

“Good job Noelle! Getting faster every day!” She smiled in response to her coach and gave a shy laugh. She knew she was fast, she was the fastest on the team. She rarely ever returned empty handed from a meet, though she never took pride in her accolades. They all went in a box under her bed where they would never see the sun again. Where she would never see them again.

“Hey, track star!” Yet she was constantly reminded of it.

“Hey Jockington.” She gave a wave. “What's up?”

“Nothing much. Did you talk to Catti?”

“Yeah.”

“And?”

“And, what?”

“Are you gonna play?” He asked with a smile.

“Yeah.” She said with a sigh.

“Hell yeah!” Jockington cheered. “I can't wait!”

“Well you're gonna have to. Now hurry up, I bet you can't beat me.”

“Oh you're so on!”

The two took off down the track, the blonde clearly being the faster of the two, but she slowed down so she could still pass friendly banter around for the rest of practice.

///

She couldn't sleep. No matter what she did, she just ended up tossing and turning. Her phone told her it was one in the morning, luckily it was a Saturday, so she didn't have to wake up at seven like normal. She stared at the ceiling for a bit, hoping maybe it would cast a magic spell and send her into a peaceful slumber, but alas it did not. Noelle sighed in defeat and reached for her earbuds, connecting them to her phone, letting them fill her ears with a beautiful melody of emotions fueled by instruments. She thought back to what Catti and her had somewhat discussed earlier this week. In all honesty it's almost all she had been thinking about since Wednesday.

“Battle of the Bands.” She spoke the words into the silence, knowing no one would respond.

She loved music, it was her favorite thing. Christmas was filled with music, movies were filled with music, video games were filled with music, even the steady tempo of her hooves hitting the ground while she ran created its own melody. Everywhere was filled with music and she loved it.

Susie's snore sounds like music. She thought to herself as a smile crossed her face. Everything about Susie was like music to her. Her laugh, her smile, even when she yelled it was beautiful. She was just beautiful. Noelle smiled at the thought of the other girl before she flung her feet over the edge of her bed and sat up. Susie had been over to her house yesterday. It was nice having Susie over, they talked about severed hands, caught a mouse, and just joked around. She couldn't believe that Susie wanted to get flirting lessons from Kris of all people, what enemies was Kris flirting with, and why did Susie need to learn how to do it too? She thought Susie was perfectly suave enough on her own.

Kris’s flirting skills are still probably better than my dad's. Noelle giggled to herself. That afternoon had been perfect, until her mom got home and yelled at her and Susie. Even though the memory involved her mother she couldn't help but smile. Susie had been her hero, shouting at her mom that she was taking her daughter to the festival. She honestly couldn't wait, she knew Kris would probably be there too, but it was still an excuse to be near her crush. An excuse that Susie herself had accepted and double downed on before getting kicked out of her house for the foreseeable future. It was worth it though, to talk to Susie about similar interests, to joke around. To hear her play Dess's guitar. Her smile faltered at the thought of her sister, she missed her, but she also knew that she wouldn't want Noelle to dwell on the past. So she didn't, instead she carefully walked to her room and grabbed the guitar from where her mother had carefully set it down after she finished yelling at Noelle, and walked back up to her room. She climbed out her window and onto the roof, where she gazed at the stars and began to play an all too familiar melody in an up down up strumming pattern.

"Susie May goes out at night"

Noelle smiles at the sky as she sings.

"Thinking of all the things she likes
She can't afford to throw those things away
Susie May forgets she's not okay"

"And does she know
It's not fine that she cries at night?"
"And does she know
It's not alright that she hates to fly?"

She began swaying as she played and smiled as she recalled memories of her crush, that this song just coincidentally shared a name with.

"Susie May, you're not okay"
"Time to find your way"
"I'm alright, don't you see?
Always tangled in bedsheets"
"You can see it in my eyes, always
1 AM with swollen eyes"

Tears fell softly downt her face, but Noelle kept playing the song, singing to herself as she did so. She knew she needed to tell her how she felt, she doesn't have it in her to keep hiding it forever. She had an idea of how she would tell Susie, she just needed to get Catti on board with her.

Chapter Text

No.” Her monotone voice rang out through the silence if the garage.
“No?” Noelle tilted her head sideways as confusion overtook her face.
“No.”
“Wh, uh, why not?”
“She's a. Demon.” Catti stared at Noelle, her expression never changing.
“Fuhuhuhuh. Are you serious?” She asked in between bouts of laughter.
“Completely. She is. The dark. Don't walk amongst her.” Her town didn't give it away, nor did her neutral expression, but she was hurt.
“How do you mean?”
“Rude. Maleficent. Evil.”
“She's not a Disney villain Catti, she's just a girl.”
“If she's just. A girl. Then pick a new one.” Noelle burst into laughter once more.
“Fuhuhuh. Catti I've liked this girl for two years at this point, I can't just pick a new one.”
“Why not? Why is she? So special?” Catti didn't mean to pry, she was asking to protect her own heart, her own secret. She was highly aware the blonde could never return her feelings, but she held on to a semblance of hope.
“Oh boy, what doesn't.” Noelle said with a wide smile. “She's funny, her laugh is infectious, she tries to be mysterious but fails. She's got the cutest smile, and when I talk to her it's like the world just melts away. It's just her, and I am blessed enough to bask in the light that comes with.” She could feel her nose glowing as she talked, memories flashing through her mind like lightning with no thunder, a song with no lyrics, because sound was not needed. Just feelings.
“Oh.” Was all Catti could say as a pang shot through her chest and ripped it apart. Every interaction she had with Noelle was just that of friends, and it hurt to know. Every ritual, every séance, every scary movie, everything. Even when Noelle let her do her makeup for a cover, it was all because she was a good friend. Noelle was a good friend, and even though she knew that's all they would ever be, she couldn't let her jealousy and anger towards Susie ruin her relationship with Noelle. She was lucky to be her friend, so she'd do everything to keep it that way, even if it meant letting her friend jump into the dark on a dopamine infested whim.
“Look Catti. I know you don't like her and I'm not asking you to like her, I'm asking you to help me. I don't think I can keep hiding this from her. It's gonna come out one way or another and I'd really like it to be on my terms. If I get hurt by her, then I get hurt and there's no bad blood, we'll still be friends at the end of the day. Please help me.” Noelle quieted down as she awaited her friend's response.
“Fine.” Catti said reluctantly, the pain shimmering in her eyes.
“Wait. REALLY!” Catti smiled as she watched her friend's face light up. Noelle never had to know how she felt towards her, but she did know how Noelle felt towards Susie, and she'd rather die than subject her to the pain she was currently experiencing.
“Yes. Really. Now give me the playlist.” She extended a paw out.
“Okay!” She handed Catti her phone and watched as she scrolled through the Playlist.
“You said you compiled this of songs you'd want to use as a confession?” Noelle nodded her head in response, causing Catti to chuckle. “I can tell.”
“Hey! What's that supposed to mean?”
“it means. You're a love struck fool. And I can tell.” Noelle's face lit up like a Christmas tree and she stared at the floor. Catti thought it was cute. “Okay, pick a song and we'll play it.”
“Okay.” Noelle said as she took her phone back.
“Then after. We play all of them. You can choose. Which one you want to use.”
“Sounds perfect. Thank you so much Catti!”
“Anything for you. Noelle.” She whispered as she smiled slightly.
“How about this one?
“Cool, play it so I can hear the music, then we'll practice after I have everything figured out.” Noelle nodded her head in response as she hit play, filling the garage with music that she couldn't help but sway to. It was a simple beat to follow, kinda just played on loop for the whole time. Catti was good at instruments, she could play pretty much anything, so whatever song Noelle picked, Catti could support. Slowly she started playing the drums, lightly tapping to mimic the electronic effect of the song, Noelle hummed along to it all. It was a soft song, sweet in tone and in words. It didn't take long for Catti to get the timing down before she paused the song and looked up at Noelle. 'You wanna try singing along?’
“Yeah, let's do it.” She walked up to the microphone and grabbed the stand, it moved in her grasp, showcasing her anxiety for a crowd of none. She nodded her head and Catti began playing.
“I'm outside your house
Can't live without” She sang very softly, barley echoing off the walls even with the help of the microphone.
“Something to bring me back home” She smiles
“I knock on your door
I sit on your porch”
“Waiting for you to come down
And I wanna show you
All my favorite things”
“When something happens
I wish you were with me” She got louder as she sang.
“There's something about you
Uh-uh-uh…”
“There's something about you
Uh-uh-uh…” She was swaying with microphone shifting her weight from one foot to the other.
“There's something about you
Uh-uh-uh..”
“There's something about you
Uh-uh-uh…” She paused for a slight second.
“I'm wantin' to say
In all kinds of ways
How you make me feel inside” her nose began to glow again as her smile grew with every passing word.
“I feel alive
There's tears in my eyes”
“I know it's cliché
But it's true”
“And I wanna show you
All my favorite things”
“When something happens
I wish you were with me”
There's something about you
Uh-uh-uh…” She drew out the last word, letting it ring off the wall and dance with the air as it faded into her eardrums.
“How was that?” She asked Catti.
“Beautiful” was all she could muster in reply. It was like everything else she did, absolutely beautiful. She smiled. “pick another song. as beautiful as it was. I wouldn't use that one. to confess.”
“I guess you're right.” Noelle sighed.
“Don't worry. If anyone's got this. It's you. You're amazing.”
“Thank you Catti, you're a wonderful friend. I'm so lucky to have you in my life.”
“I'm the lucky one.” She hid her pain. “Now hurry up.”
“Okay, okay. How about this one?” Noelle handed Catti her phone once again and let the song play. This cycle of choosing songs and playing them repeated until the Sun threatened to send the world into darkness only illuminated by stars, and Noelle had to go home. She went home happy, a smile on her face, her plan was falling into motion and she couldn't wait to see how it all ended. Whether in romance or despair, she was going to try her best to swoon the girl of her dreams.