Chapter Text
You never really understood this place, a small ever dark room with just a desk and far too many eyes watching your every move. The man you've known as Sebastian for all this time taps his fingers annoyingly along the desk as every moment you spend here is another he's forced to be here. Usually your time in this space is never this long but you find yourself here more and more lately, rereading files you've seen hundreds of times now. Each word has been etched into your brain by this point and yet also feel gone. Like when a word has been said so many times that it starts to not feel real.
"You've been staring at that thing for AGES now. Surely it doesn't take you that long to read." The last word he hisses out as his frustration is starting to outweigh his patience. You simply glimpse up at him then back down to the file in your hands. After so long any of his threats or insults have lost all their sting. You've been through this all one too many times. You're losing count.
You stand there for a time longer just thinking as you continue to stare at the file in your hands. Z-283 The Angler. You've encountered and dodged that thing so many times it's hard to think back to when you used to be totally clueless. That time in general is hard to remember. Whatever small part of you still lives on in the decaying husk you call a body trembles at the thought of forgetting that time. Back when you were alive, when things made at least some sense, before all of this before you.
Your expression begins to twitch from a deadpan look to something almost sorrowful, as if grieving. Suddenly something stirs in you. A spark kicking your senses into gear for just a split second to remind your brain what real fear is like. A fear of losing yourself. You can't stand this. You can't stand these damn files! They're all full of information that means almost nothing to you. Why does it matter to know where they were discovered or what some nameless scientist did to them. All you care is what they'll do to you!
These files are worthless. You need something more concise to just glimpse and move on ... or maybe just something more personal. Not stories of tests but of your own days here and dealing with these creatures. Something to remind yourself what it felt like to encounter them for the first time, what it felt like to be yourself. You suddenly look up at the figure looming over you.
"You have a pen and paper?"
"what?" His confusion only lightly peering through his annoyance at finally seeing you move again.
"I want to write things down, so do you have a pen and some paper?" You slow down speaking the second half of that sentence like Sebastian wouldn't understand you otherwise.
"And what exactly is sooo important that you must write it down?" He leans more towards the desk to get on your level and in your face.
"Just answer me." You unwaver in your want and don't feel like bantering an excuse of small talk.
He grumbles a bit to himself before the arm on his side reaches towards a drawer and does indeed pull out a pen for you. But the man makes no other move after that. You cock an eyebrow at him as you continue to wait.
"I'd say you have plenty enough paper right there in your hands. Don't you think? Perfect for writing whatever amazing novel idea you must have come up with to waste both of our time here." The sarcasm in his tone was palpable.
But he at least had enough of a point, maybe even more than he could realize. The files only had their information printed on one side, the back was ample space to write. The information could even stay here with every single file. Turn them over and your reminders are right there. And they'd remain right here through this marching circle known as what time has become.
With that you sit yourself down, back against the desk and flip over the first page. Sebastian sighs and rests his head in one of his hands again as he knows this is going to be a while. You press the pen to the paper then and start to think, what exactly do you write? You can simplify how the entity kills you sure, but you want to also remind yourself what it does to you. What it HAS done to you for so long ..... what has it done to you?
You sit for a moment and think back, very far back to the first time encountering the Angler. It was also your first day entering the Blacksite. You take a breath and just try to take your mind back to that time. Remembering every detail you can.