Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The gate slowly closed and opened, making scraping sounds. Raindrops from last night were dripping down the roof. Ymir felt sharply cold when she realized she had left the window unlocked from the evening. The blankets didn't help her at all, as they were too thin. And all because she'd spent the whole evening deciding whether to write to her or not. She often does this, fantasizing about her, imagining what would happen if she wasn't so nervous around her. But every time these attempts are not very successful, it's as if she doesn't see Ymir or just pretends not to, doesn't notice how desperately she wants her attention. For a year now, she's been following her around like a dog whose toys have been taken away and she's desperate to get them back. Maybe that was true in a way.

A sharp rush of wind reminded her of herself, and all desire to sleep abruptly evaporated. She rose slowly, rubbing her eyes. Her hands created support on the bed so she slowly placed her feet on the mat. The wind was rubbing her face now, brushing her brown hair behind her. She reached out a hand to finally close that ill-fated window. But she couldn't afford to ruin her mood since the weekend was over and it was time for school today. Usually all the students were reluctant to go there, but not Ymir, because school was where the thing that kept her in this damn town was.

She hurriedly said goodbye to her mom, not wanting to hear another fight between her and her father. It's always the same. Ymir's whole life is a routine that leaves you wanting more from life. Everything but her. Ymir pushed the door open gently to enter her school. She had only been at Shingeki High for 3 years, since arriving in this city, because her parents had changed cities to keep up with a better life. Ymir was infuriated by this trait of her parents, they didn't have their own priorities or thoughts in life, but only followed what everyone else was doing. Sometimes it seemed to Ymir that they had given birth to her, just because all newlyweds in marriage have children. But all her thoughts were interrupted when she saw those bright blue eyes she had missed so much over the weekend. Her hair as always, so groomed and soft. Sometimes she managed to stroke it when she was in a good mood. Historia had always drawn Ymir's attention to herself, not only because she was beautiful and not because everyone looked at her as an absolute goddess descended from the heavens, but also because it seemed to Ymir that they were very much alike. Historia seemed to be hiding something in her bitchy character. Except it didn't seem that way from the outside.

Ymir wasn't as rich nor beautiful as Historia, she had average looks, narrow amber eyes, freckles all over her face and dark skin. Not that it ever bothered her that much, she's fine with things as they are. She doesn't need that kind of attention at her expense. But Ymir's adoration didn't last long, as from Historia's side the creep embraced her in a hug. Ymir's blood boiled whenever she saw him near her, but she couldn't do anything about it, since Reiner and Historia were dating, it was a secret to no one. What could be more cliché than high school queens, Reiss' daughter, and Reiner, popular soccer player together. Everyone talked about how they were perfect for each other, but Ymir seemed to be the only one who saw the longing in Historia's eyes when she was with Rainer.

"Baby, where have you been? I've been looking for you, do you want my fans to take me apart?" Reiner tried to joke.

Historia just looked at him and said nothing. Reiner's feelings, Ymir never understood. Sometimes she thought he liked nothing more than soccer and staring at girls' asses. But Reiner never talked seriously to anyone but Historia, and even though she always followed him around, he followed her everywhere, reminding Ymir of herself. And of course Berthold was with them everywhere, like a third wheel. Doesn't he realize how strange it looks from the outside? But Reiner didn't seem to mind Bertholdt's constant company. She smirked to herself, as if she had learned some hidden secret.

Ymir ran after Historia in the hallway trying not to bump into anyone on the way.

"Hey, Historia! Wait." Ymir said, putting her hands on her knees to catch her breath.

"Ymir?" She looked at the girl questioningly.

"Why did you ignore me in the hall? I thought we were going to the office together."

"You stared at me and Rainer for too long. I thought you weren't going."

Ymir smiled at Historia's explanation and they walked quietly towards the office. No one seemed to care about Historia and it was pathetic how Ymir ran after her on her heels, but she didn't believe it somewhat. The school was full of people who were eager to socialize, but she ignored everyone but Ymir. Reiner, as luck would have it, interrupted their moment.

"Ymir, are you here again?"

" Well, I know it's hard to expect you to remember we're in the same class, but you could at least pretend to use your brain."

"You know what I mean by “here,” Reiner grumbled."

"Not everyone sticks to you 24/7 like Bertholdt to understand you from half a word. You'll have to be clearer."

"You son of a-", he was already furious and made a move to grab Ymir's vest. But then he heard Historia's noisy yawn.

"Reiner, will you always fall for Ymir's provoking? Be discreet, she's just joking."

Ymir both surprised and smirked at Historia's words, feeling that she had won this little fight with him.

"Of course, baby" he said through gritted teeth.

Studying was as boring as ever, Ymir couldn't concentrate when Historia and Rainer were sitting in front of her. But there was an upside to that, in that she could hear everything they talked about. And the conversation always amused her, most of the time it was Reiner in desperate attempts to invite Historia to his house. Historia didn't often agree to hang out with him, but there were still those occasions. Then Ymir would pierce them with her gaze, reluctantly watching them from afar. She hoped Reiner hadn't done anything serious to her, even the thought of it stung. Though, as stupid or hopeless it sounded Ymir declined even the little chance of that happening. Suddenly she caught a glimpse of something.

"-you're coming, aren't you? I know you have business, but my mom left the house in my charge" Reiner said this too close to her ear, holding her shoulder. When Historia wanted to reply, Ymir interrupted their conversation.

"Party, then?"

"What's it to you? You're not invited."

"Don't make me upset Rainer, I thought we were friends" Ymir said with a fake pout.

"Really, why didn't you invite Ymir? She's my friend, if you don't invite her, I won't go either."

Ymir looked at Historia in surprise. Of course they were talking, that is Ymir was trying to talk to her, but she didn't expect it from her at all. But Ymir knew it was a poor excuse to not attend that goddam party rather than wanting her there too. With a smirk she looked at Reiner's scowl. It was obvious that he couldn't stand her, every time Ymir ruined their romantic moment in Rainer's opinion.

"But I--"

"Well, if you can't, then party without me."

There was an uncomfortable silence, apparently Reiner didn't dare to say anything. But finally he looked at Ymir and invited her into his house.

"Do not bring anyone, I don't need any more losers."

Ymir and Historia seemed equally surprised by the statement. But the blondie didn't mind and looked at the blackboard as if she was interested in the lesson.

At lunch, Ymir couldn't sit next to Historia, so Connie and Sasha invited her over. They're not bad, they're obviously closer to her than the others, but sometimes they do things that make Ymir want to tell everyone she doesn't know them.

" Today's lunch is delicious!"

"You say that every damn day."

"Gee, chew first, then talk, it's disgusting to watch!"

"We can't all be as perfect as Historia, can we Ymir?"- Sasha added, still chewing and grabbing the bread at the same time.

"Tell me about it, smoochie smoochie." As Connie and Sasha started teasing her with fake kissing and hugging themselves.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, we know you think, we're dumb, but don't think we're blind! We know your bullshit, Ymir. I don't know why you're hiding it so much, everyone can see you're chasing her."

"Yeah, yeah, even though she's in a relationship, that's not stopping you. You've got a lot of nerve, Ymir!"

"Sasha! -Don't yell like that. I just know she doesn't like Reiner and wants to get away from him, that's why I hang out with her sometimes. I'm sure that guy is blackmailing her. I just need to find out and I'll tell that blonde - boom, she will be forever thankful to me."

Sasha and Connie looked at each other and sighed.

"Kay, seems that she's leaving, bye guys!"

"Bye, Ymir" they said sadly at the same time.

"Too bad for her, huh, Connie?"

"Well, you first find yourself a boyfriend and then feel sorry for others."

Sasha with indignation aghast.

"Y-you! How dare you! I thought we're on the same team!"

-He shoved bread in her mouth and Sasha was suddenly silent.

After lessons, Ymir was about to leave, but she saw that Reiner said something to Historia and kissed her cheeks and went the other way with Berthold. Well, this is her chance.

"Are you waiting for someone, Goldie?"

"My driver, since Reiner won't drive me home today."

"How can that asshole have anything more important than you."

Historia looked questioningly at Ymir. Then Ymir realized what she has just said so her cheeks flushed and she tried to change the subject.

"If you have time, there's a casserole place nearby that serves the most delicious buns. I saw that you didn't eat anything for lunch, so I thought you were hungry" she tried to say the-most-in-her-opinion-non-chalant-way.

Historia looked at her for what seemed like ten minutes or seconds, but for Ymir it lasted forever. She thought she said something stupid and was about to cancel, but Historia interrupted her.

"Sure, whatever."

Ymir couldn't believe her own success, but she didn't push her luck by asking questions. They were in silence the whole way, mostly because Ymir was uncharacteristically nervous and the blonde next to her didn't say anything but stared at her phone. When they got to the casserole Ymir paid for two, even though she realized she was showing off the last of her money.

"You didn't lie about the taste"

"When have you ever seen me lie to anyone?" Ymir puffed her chest like a proud child

"Hmm, let me remember, maybe when you told the janitor Levi that it was not you who spilled juice on the floor and in the consequences Armin and Marco got punished? Or when you made Jean believe he had a spider in his hair and jumped out of class? Or ... mmph!"

"I get it, I'm a liar who's easy for you to figure out," she said, covering Historia's mouth with her hand. But then she realized her mistake as she felt soft lips under her fingers. Ymir's face turned a crimson color.

"Hey, Hands! -You ruined my lipstick."

Indeed, when she looked at her palm she saw red prints. Oh, she's not gonna wash that hand anytime soon.

"I'm sorry" she said without slightest regret in her voice.

After a minute of comfortable silence, Historia tried to start the conversation.

"Say, you don't like Reiner, do you?"

"Who really likes that asshole besides blind fans? Seriously, he's got that face, if you say a complex sentence his brain will fail saying "error" "error"."

A sweet laughter stopped her speech. It was the first time Ymir had heard Historia's genuine laughter, and how beautiful she was when she laughed. Her little nose quivered slightly, and her smile revealed white, beautiful teeth. When she opened her eyes again, her blue eyes seemed to reflect the light, shining. Ymir stared like a mosquito at the light.

"Is there something on my face?"

"Probably sincerity, but it weirdly look good on you" Ymir wanted to say but instead shook her head.

Suddenly a slight breeze picked up and almost revealed Historia's short skirt. Since she was a cheerleader, she wore that red tank top and skirt all the time, with “Shingeki” written on her chest. Ymir would always forcefully open her eyes from her. Seeing that, Ymir blushed once more, even though it seemed redder than ever.

Ymir took off her jacket and tied it to her waist.

Historia looked at her with surprise once again, as if it was the first time someone had ever done a good deed for her.

" Thank you, Ymir" She smiled at her.

After a few minutes Historia's phone rang and her mood changed immediately.

"The driver didn't show up and I was waiting for him!" she shouted into the phone. Ugh, Ymir would hate to be the center of her anger. Though she was so cute even when she was angry. "Okay, I'm waiting," she hung up the phone and looked at Ymir.

-"Well, thanks for the buns, but I gotta go."

"Already?"

"Yes, it was nice walking with you" Historia got into a car so luxurious that Ymir didn't know what brand it even was.

"Yes, me too!" Ymir said and waved vigorously in her direction. Even though, the car was already at a long distance, she didnt quit waving as an idiot she was.

Chapter Text

Historia got off the car, shutting the door too hard than necessary. It was a pity that she has to go back home, as today her father had some guests over and obviously they are here to talk shit for long hours straight. Those fake interactions drained all of her energy, though she became good at nodding and pretending that she gives two shits about stories where they are monopolizing yet another company.

Her father, Rod Reiss, was for sure a important person. The Reiss company is one of the biggest companies in town but can't say the most successful. Ever since the company was handed to her dad, several issues came up because Rod proved himself to be a poor boss and the scandal about him cheating on his first wife didn’t help the situation at all. His first wife demanded half of the auctions of Reiss company while divorcing, her having five children occasionally made it easier for her lawyers to reach that goal. She really couldn't blame her, Rod was a hell of a husband and a father too. Worst thing in this, her mother wasn't pleased with him either. She did not have a slightest idea that she is being a second choice in his life. My mother used to work as a maid in the Reiss penthouse and was trusted by people under the roof. Apparently, not a lot of trust should have been given to this woman. When she found out she was pregnant, she immediately used it to sabotage Rod and made a very noisy scandal.

"Historia! Finally decided to show up?" Her mother went down the stairs, already pissed at whatever millionth reason. Historia just looked and her and decided it would be best to not have any interaction while she's not in the mood.

"I'm talking to you, you spoiled brat!"

"As you can see, I came from school, I don't see any reasons for me to be at home since sunrise to noon." Blonde girl answered, not even giving a glance. She knew a better reason than provoking her mother.

"You think you're old enough to talk back now?"  with every each word, she increased her voice and walking right towards Historia. "I am an owner in this house and you will be in at whatever damn time I tell you to!"

Great, she was yelling now. No matter what Historia does, in some strange way she pissed her mother. Girl left any attempts to have motherly love a long time ago. Once, she sneaked and tried to surprise her with a hug, her mother grabbed her face and shoved little Historia into the wall without any regret. Then she saw it, pure hatred in her eyes. She didn’t have any clue, what horrendous thing, she had done to deserve that. Where is kindness what is told by books? Clearly, that was a fairytale.

"Ah, Miss Reiss, there you are. We almost lost you at the affair." Some man in a tasteless gray suit approached them in the hall, clearly he heard all of the conversation as loud as it was, but pretended not to.

"Oh, excuse my misbehavior, Mr.Tybur. I was just greeting my daughter from her school." It was no surprise to Historia how absurdly fast she changes when some rich scums are near.

"I see Miss Historia is here too" he said reaching for my hand to obviously kiss it. In any other situation, she would dodge it rather having her hand chopped than this, but right now her mother was watching and she couldn't risk it. He grabbed her hand and gave it sloppiest kiss ever. Her stomach might have just flipped in disgust, but her face stayed neutral as ever.

"Pleased to meet you here Mr.Tybur" she said through smiling.

"You have grown into a pretty young lady."

Disgusting. One word to describe not only him or this interaction or situation but her whole life. It always felt so disgusting and fake.

"Well, Mr.Tybur i think it is time for us to rejoin the party" she said longing every sentence. Historia felt a little relief, cause he was leaving. Mother was trying to protect her innocent daughter from that filthy man, is something that no one would force her to believe. Because true reason to get Mr.Tybur out of here is that now, not all of the attention on her.

She sat on the edge of her bed,hugging her legs. She doesn't know what's worse, father that doesn't give a glimpse at her or mother that is constantly after her, no matter what she does. A shed of tear run through her cheek. Her body trembled when she felt a notification from her phone. When she opened her phone two messages was on screen from two different people.

Reiner: baby? You got home safe >?

Reiner, she never quite formed a solid opinion on him. Everyone in the school would dream to be in her place and the vice versa. But the decision to date Reiner was never her will. As if to build a good relationship with other companies, Rod tried to use his daughter's beauty as if they were in the middle age. But who wouldn't want to date Historia, anyways. While his father would have give her to any horrendous excuse of a man, she actually got lucky with just Reiner. His mother did not had a quiet big company to offer, but with Reiner's popularity, she gained even more fans on social media. And being the subject of rumors and news gave signal saying that Reiss company was still on business.

Well, Reiner was sure good-looking, no one could deny that. Those big biceps and six pack abs, golden gaze, complacent smirk could make any girl faint. But, Historia wasn't slightly amused by it, even though not being attracted to Reiner, she can admit that he is her best choice. He is little dumb, but he never pushes too far. Knowing Historia's stance, he was just playing his role in public, making sure that their parents or the fans stayed fooled. They first met he said that he had fallen for her and if she ever changes her opinion on him, he would be there and waiting for her. But waiting doesn't mean not trying to increase his chances. He constantly tried to hold hands, hug her from side in public. He knew his place and used this privilege to its limits. One thing was for sure, she would never develop any kind of romantic feelings for him.

Next message was:

Unknown: what are u up to, Goldie?

From profile picture she instantly knew that it was Ymir. She wrote to Historia from time to time, and their interactions were not so long. There were many people that hacked her phone number or bought it, so they could have a chance to talk to her and she had no trouble ignoring them. But something about that freckled girl drew her attention. She is used to constant attention from the others, but Ymir was somehow different. Whether it was her intentions or the status, it seemed to Historia that Ymir didn't want anything from her. Everytime they talk, she doesn't try to ask Historia to buy something or introduce her to some rich boy she knew. It was strangely genuine. While, Historia acted not to be impressed on the outside, she was curious where their little interactions would lead as she was the only person Historia couldn't predict.

Goldie Historia: Not much, listening to laughter downstairs.

Unknown: oh party much?

Goldie Historia: Just another affair

Unkown: *photo insert where Ymir is holding a teacup with her pinky out* I'm having an affair myself here.

Chuckle.

"Gosh she is so stupid and childlike," Historia whispered to herself while slowly lying to bed on her stomach, with smile spreading on her face. Her body isn't tense anymore and she started swinging her legs back and forth.

*Historia has liked the photo*

Something heavy was felt under her stomach, when she laid on bed. She half-turned on her side to see what it was. The thing that was hurting her was a knot of Ymir's jacket.

Oh, I totally forgot to return Ymir's jacket.

She lightly run over it, remembering how after Ymir wrapped it around her, she surprisingly felt the cold wind not so unsettling. Untying it, she slipped her arms in the jacket. The oversized jacket hung over her shoulders, almost swallowing her into the different dimension. It felt messy, bulky and definitely not cozy at all.

On a second thought, I'm totally not returning it.

Ymir looked at her phone and noticed that she got a like from her. Well, she knew her charm is totally irresistible, but it got her worrying if it meant something. She put the spoon in her mouth and tried to text something creative.

Unknown: U got something prepared to the party?

Ymir tried to chew the spoon while waiting but immediately remembered that it was a metal. Leaning to the counter she started to tapping her phone as if it would give her an immediate response. Finally, she saw a text.

Goldie Historia: Not really, no.

Rubbing her thumbs over keyboard to consider what to write, she finally gained a courage to ask.

Unknown: If ur not so busy, we could go to mall shopping or smth.

The text messages got her so captivated that it went through her notice to turn the oven off. Bitter smell fill the whole kitchen having Ymir to uncontrollably cough. She quickly grabbed the pie without thinking and her fingers got burned a little bit. There she was, looking at the slightly burned apple pie. God her mother will kill her. Though, her phone, with what she didn't get attached even she got her kitchen almost blowing up, buzzed of notification. Seeing that message made Ymir grin like an idiot, immediately forgetting whatever business she had before.

Goldie Historia: Kay

Chapter Text

Okay, calm down. What are you being nervous for? It's just shopping, nothing special, right?

It was the mantra she was repeating to herself while taking a last 76388th look at the mirror before she leaves. Oh gosh why did she even ask her out, if she is shaking like a lie detector in a politician's pocket.

Wait. Waiwaiwait, asking out? Did that hang out offer sounded like a date? What if Historia thinks it's a date?

Ymir is so dead for that thought, because she started imagining herself holding Historia's soft hands. Maybe, even caressing her smooth cheek, that looked liked porcelain kissed by light. Don't even let Ymir get started about her li- no, she should not get ahead of herself. With sharp movement, she slapped her face with both hands, making her get down to earth. Her eyes looked at the clock, its already noon. It's time to cut that bullshit and leave. After all, there's nothing on a risk, they see each other everyday. What on earth could be different today? Those reassuring thoughts calmed Ymir's nerves a little bit, so she twisted the keys and made her way down the buildings stairs.

Oh, shit.

What difference yeah?

Well, she's fucking gorgeous today, that's what. Well, Historia is always pretty, but right now, as she is slowly approaching the mall with her blue, white dotted dress that hugged her waist so gracefully, she looks like model from paradise. Maybe, their town was named Paradise, because the angel like Historia lived here. Her golden hair was clipped up, but some of it comfortably brushed her bare shoulders.

Ymir quickly pulled herself together, checking her own outfit. Nothing special actually, pair of blue jeans and gray pullover. It rained yesterday so her mom forced her to dress warmer but it was obviously warm.

"Hey." Historia's voice brought her back to reality.

"Hey"

There was an awkward silence for a good 10 seconds of them staring at each other, not knowing what to say. The air seemed so tense, all of a sudden and that's what Ymir was scared for. She has a horrible habit of not knowing when to shut the fuck up nor when she should be talking to keep the conversation alive. That’s why she called Annie last night with her hypothetical what if questions.

***

"So did you finally asked her out on a date? I didn’t know Historia broke up with Reiner" Annie bluntly said, trying to get to the point, because it was 2 pm in the middle of the night and she was supposed to be seeing her third dream right now.

"W-what? I told you it's not Historia!"

Silence

More silence.

"Yes it's Historia and no, she didn’t break up with Reiner. We're just going to buy some clothes." Ymir finally admitted to Annie at least if not to herself. Because whoever Ymir could lie to without any shame, Annie was not one of those people. It always felt like Annie saw her through the bones and don't get Ymir wrong, she is not afraid of anyone, but Annie's stare was so intense, that no one dared to lie to her with her "bad girl" reputation. Neither did Ymir.

Annie sighed into the phone. Rubbing her eyes, she said "What do you want me to say? To free you from guilt of stealing that jackass's girlfriend?"

"What? No, that's not it."

"What it is then?"

Ymir sat up halfway on the bed, putting pillow on her back." I just noticed that you and the blondie nerd got something going on lately"

Annie's eyes widened at the statement, holding the phone more closer to her face as if to make sure no one will hear it, even though she was alone on her bed right now.

"What is it have to do with Armin?" Annie's voice was louder than before. For a person that looked like she doesn't give a shit about anyone, she seemed to get defensive when subject was Armin related.

"Oh, nothing. Just wanted to say that you two are very close, but don't rush to say it officially. "

It was true, actually. Armin and she made a deal that they would keep their new found relationship in secret. And Annie was dam serious about keeping that promise.
"It would be pity, if the whole school found out about your little secret."

"Just get to the point"

"...I want you to tell me how did he charm you"

"Uhh, what?"

"Well, for the first glance you two are hella uncompatable. What could a bad girl like you find interesting in a nerd like him? And don't get me wrong sis, but you're boyfriend looks kinda gay."

Annie rushed to justify her choice of men, but Ymir interrupted.

"Yet, at very only known to God reasons you blush at his words like some love-sick teenage girl."

If you guys could build that kind of connection, it means there's hope for me too, wanted to add Ymir, but those words were too hopeful to say outloud.

Annie carefully listened what she had to say about her relationship. To be honest, she thought it was smooth act and no one noticed the change of her behavior. Armin seemed to make her soft.

"No one charmed anyone. We just bonded over music. I was sitting alone at lunch and he approached with questions about group on my shirt. His hands were visibly trembling and I just pitied him. So I let him sit and rant about things he knew about Crystallized sleep" Annie did not notice how blush spread on her face and tip of the ears and how she was smiling while talking about him.

"Wait? That's it? You two just nerded out together and decided to date?" The confusion in her tone was very visible, because how you sway someone with yapping?

Annie twiddled the blanket in her hand back and forth. "Well, ever since, we just started sitting together during lunches and after a few failed tries he asked me out on a date."

"And what do you recommend? Ask her favorite band? She probably doesn't even listen to that shit"

"What I recommend is get off my back and gain courage to confess to her and take her rejection like a real woman would!" With those words Annie hung up.

Well, that was a useless call.

***

"Goldie, let's check the 2nd floor, I heard there were good deal." Ymir said while guiding Historia in the mall as she came here for the first time. Ymir suggested this place for simply two reasons.

One, she always shops here and knows this place by heart. Two, she does not really much money for fancy places Historia is used to. Ymir asked her mom, but all she heard was yell about her dad getting fired and that she is counting every penny. Of course, she asked Connie and Sasha in the group chat for some cash yesterday night.

Braincells Not Included

Freckles: Heyy guys, love u and miss u sm rn

Baldie: What do u want.

Freckles: Can't I just text to my friends?

Meatballs: Not this affectionate @~@

Freckles: No, I don't need anything this time

(5 minutes later)

Freckles: Guys be a real ones and throw some bands my way 🙏

Baldie deleted you from group.

Ymir and Historia stood on the elevator, standing next to each other. Neither of them really spoke, but just because Ymir noticed that Historia is bothered by something. She has an eyebags on her beautiful face. Even though Ymir didn't notice it at the first glance, because Historia tried to cover it with makeup, it was visible that she is very pale.

Sighing she put an arm around her shoulder. "Welp, Goldie bet you didn’t know this place."

"No, my mom does not have a high opinion of places like this"

Welp, blessings of a mommy in law is guaranteed now. "Does she know that you're here?"

"No, not everything should be controlled by her!" She retorted with a glare. Her face softened a little, realizing that she was not with her mother. Historia got off the elevator and walked faster to first boutique she layed her eyes on.

Ymir was taken aback by that sharp response. Not so often you can hear her snapping at Ymir. If it was any other person, she would be happy that they got angry with her remarks. Ymir is always thrilled of successful rage-bate. But, with Historia it never seemed right to see her angry at her.

Ymir quickly run to Historia's direction, pretending to be interested in stuff. Historia walked in deeper and she followed her.

Then, one blond shop assistant approached her with big smile on her face and asked.

"How many weeks are you?"

Huh.

Ymir finally understood where she was standing. She got so concentrated on following Historia that she didn’t notice she walked into kid's section and that she is grabbing newborn baby's clothes. She quickly put her hand on stomach.

They're thinking that.

Oh god.

"Oh, nonono, it's just-"

But, she interrupted her and said. "Don't worry I know how hard it's to be a teen mom. I was at your age too when I became a mother, now I have three beautiful daughters-" and she started to yapping about her whole life. Ymir just stared at her without having any chance to deny that she was not pregnant!

In sudden of a motion, she looked at Historia's side, hoping for help, all that Ymir saw that she is covering her mouth, trying to hide her laughter, but failing. Historia was so amused by the whole situation that suddenly Ymir didn't mind being lectured how to make perfect breastmilk that can taste like real one.

After Ymir shoved her off by saying she will see another sections, she approached Historia immediately.

"Satisfied much, I see."

"Oh, I am, don't worry" Historia chuckled while she flipped through the rack.

One dress caught her attention. Red, long sleeveless dress, it is similar to what her mother wore, when she attended Historia's birthday ten years ago. It was her first and last time acknowledging her birthday. She was so glad that mommy came, that she lit up brighter than any candles on her cake. But it turned out that she only came because Frida's rich boyfriend's father came there too. At first when she saw Frida, my half sister, she tried to ruin the birthday party. Yelling that she and her arrogant mother are not welcome in her house. But, as soon as she realized who was here, she calmed herself down, turning on the perfect mode on.

"I want this one" Historia handed the dress to the assistant. "Bring it to the changing room"

Ymir watched as she grabbed that long dress and disappeared behind the curtains.
After a short time, she started to look her clothes for herself. Usually, many of those things were tasteless, because either it was crop top that showed her belly button, which Ymir despised with all heart. Or they were with enormous logos or city names printed across them. Who really wants to wear a shirt with "TROST" print?

"What do you think?" Historia asked, briefly after a moment. She walked with a gorgeous dress on. After short pause Ymir answered.

"It doesn't suit you" Ymir said and continued examining the price tags.

"What?! This is a great dress!"

"No arguing on that. It is a great dress. But not for you. And plus with your short height, hem of the dress is mopping the floor"

"Huh??" Historia angrily looked at Ymir, raising her eyebrow. Darn, even though she is mad right now. She looks so adorable. But she does not want to escalate the situation.

"But this looks like one of my mother's old dress and what she usually wears. She looks stunning"

Ymir put the shirt that she held against her chest in front of the mirror. With a tender touch Ymir raised her chin with a index finger, so she would look at her.

"Maybe, because, You are not her. Even though, she is your mother doesn't mean you should be like her or you are her. Listen, you are your own unique person."

Historia was mesmerized by Ymir right now. Staring into her hazel eyes, it seemed that she was the first genuine person in her life. No one has ever said anything near to that. It was either people telling her how to behave or people that already have a fictional image of her and refuse to know the real her.

"Well, what do you think would suit me?"

Ymir patted her head. " You're the one who shoukd decide that." With those words Ymir went in the changing room.

Historia looked for a good dress really long. While she was looking Ymir bought herself a black dress. On the front it was above her knees but back was longer. Dress was sleeveless, having a silver embellishments on a neckline. What can Ymir say? She was down for a simple dress. When she bought it, the cashier looked at her weirdly and gave a discount.

"You're doing the right thing, being a mom should not stop you from partying" Cashier handed her the dress. This time Ymir didn’t even try to deny, because who knew it could benefit her a discount. She wasn't even mad anymore.

"Don't tell me it's bad again." Historia opened the curtains, revealing her pastel dress. It features an off-the-shoulder neckline with a subtle ruffled trim that runs across the chest. The fit is loose and airy, falling straight without any visible waistline, and the hem moves softly as if caught in a breeze. The overall design is simple, elegant, and light.

"Woah, you look like a royalty" All what Ymir could muster to not grin like a love-sick idiot.

"Tch, whatever" Historia turned

Ymir could've sworn she saw a blush.

They decided to eat something at cafe after long exhausting shopping. Much to Ymir's and her purse's surprise Historia ordered twice more than her. She didn’t give a vibe of a girl with a big appetite. But, Ymir could not care less. As long Ymir with Historia, she's got a smile on her face.

Suddenly Historia's phone started ringing, she didn't answer. Few notifications came, but she didn't even give a glance at it. When it started getting repetitive Ymir said.

"Oi, Goldie, I think someone is trying to contact you like crazy"

"That’s probably my mom and Reiner."

"Well, okay hell with Reiner, but don't you think that you should pick your mother's call?"Ymir said smirking.

"No"

"I just think she's probably worried and-"

"Didn't you say to be my own person?"

"Well, that doesn't mean ignoring her" Ymir started to get confused. Why is she acting like this all of a sudden? They were just laughing at a dumb joke five minutes ago. Ymir thought she had it good.

With a slight irritation Historia picked up her phone. "I know, my phone died. Uh-huh. Fine, I'm waiting. Okay"

A loud, heavy silence hugged the table. Historia is looking somewhere behind her, with her eyebrows frowned like she was trying to find something. While Ymir looked directly at her, tracking her movements. Waiting maybe, if she would start explaining herself.

But instead, when a car honked and Historia stood from her chair. Not even looking at Ymir she said "Bye" and left her alone with her thoughts.

"Bye" she said into silence.

Chapter Text

Historia was looking at the car's window, pretending to find something very interesting outside. She tightly clenched her phone, repeating one scene in her head all over again. 

She might've overreacted earlier by snapping at Ymir. None of that was actually her fault. God, Historia doesn't even know why she left everything on a weird tone. Her day with Ymir was good, better than she had with her other friends, apparently. Was it so necessary to bitch in front of the last person, that was genuinely tried to be friends with her?

I can be such a jerk sometimes.

The first thing that she heard and the last person on Earth that she wants to see right now, was her mother. Yet, when the universe was ever kind enough to give her things she asked? That's exactly why, Historia sees that despised face the very first second.

Her mother wasn't as angry as Historia expected her to be. She used that fake smile, she shows all of those imbeciles. Looking like a role model for mohers. 

"Historia, get dressed, Reiner is waiting for you outside." 

Ah, that's the reason. Well, Historia is not 8 anymore to hope that she was genuinely interested or worse worried where her daughter might be.

"Tell the driver he is off for tonight."

But when Historia walked right pass her, her mother whispered something only she could hear.

After party, you are going to regret your little rebel.

Whoever watching the scene definitely wouldn't notice that Historia gulped and how her hand trembled.

The new bought dress was in her hand the whole day along and Historia just realized it, when she entered her room to change. It reminded how- no with who she spent the day. With a following guilt, she sat on her bed. The phone in her hand seemed so heavy and right words were out of her reach. 

Sigh. There's nothing to lose.

Goldie Historia: See u at the party?

Okay, she certainly couldn't call Ymir, because she doesn't even know what to say. And, after her weird attitude at the cafe Historia is not sure, Ymir would still act friendly. But the disprove of her words didn't let itself wait long.

Ymir: Yeah, sure

Historia never could've thought she would care about someone's reply so much. The speed of tension leaving her body is insane. Historia didn't even realized, she was clenching her phone in her hand so much, until she let it go, in relief. What happened to her lately? But she didn't have much time to brainstorm, due to the fact that she heard Reiner lightly knocking her door. 

"Just a minute, I'm dressing" she shouted but excitement in her voice was very evident. 

Doors opened in front of Reiner, giving him view of beautiful pastel dress on his girlfriend. 

"Babe, your dress is… uh… good. Like, really good.” Stumbling on his each word he offered his hand to the girl.

Historia kindly took it. They went down the stairs together, looking like the couple you would find in most 90th movies. He was rich so he is, her and his parents are network partners. She was popular and he had many fans.

He was a boy and she was a girl.

 Who could be more compatible than them?

The ride to the Reiner's house was unexpectedly quiet. Normally, he would start to talking about his latest matches and how he is succeeding against the other teams. Or, sometimes he would ask about her, but those questions Historia never answered.

The first person she saw when they arrived at Reiner's house was Bertholdt. He was waiting for them outside, sitting on the door frame. 

"Hey, Historia. You look good" he kindly complimented her. He was smiling, but his smile didnt reach his eyes. Actually, if Historia recalls it correctly she and Berthold always had that add atmosphere on. Even though, Berthold used to follow Reiner and her mostly of their time, they were on a dead silence when Reiner had left. Historia mostly thought it was because of her lack of interest to start a conversation with him but now rethinking it, she realizes taller guy didn't made an attempt to start it either.

"Nice dress" Annie greeted when they entered the hall. Party didn't fully start, yet, the house was loud already with all neon lights. Wherever you look, you can see drunk teenager. Half of them Historia didn't recognize.

"Thank you"

Annie was wearing all black dress and see-through black nylons. Her usual outfit. But her hair wasn't clipped like most of the time. She managed to braid the little strands of her hair.

"Looking for someone?" As always, you cannot escape from Annie's attentiveness. She quickly noticed that Historia was scanning the room for certain someone.

"No, just looking around"

"Do you like my place, baby? After all, you are not here often" Reiner interfered.

"Not bad." 

"I can introduce you to guys in my team if you want" Reiner hopefully offered to Historia. 

"No, thanks" 

Those parties were needed from time to time, because it could help to boost their popularity. Many peers used to take a photo of them and upload it on internet saying how cute they are. So, there's no good reason for her to leave.

Reiner seemed to be off guard. When Historia looked at him, he seemed to lose all his hopes. His eyes were to glassy, like if you beat a puppy. Most of his attempts at flirting or staying alone were rejected by Historia. Yet, she is more than pleased that Reiner respects her enough to never pushes himself on her.

"Then I'm gonna greet other guests. Be right back quick" he kissed on Historia's hair and left the room. 

"I don't understand why are you torturing him and yourself." Annie said, pouring herself a drink. 

"I don't know what are you talking about." 

Annie is clearly over-stepping her boundaries if she thinks she can tell Historia how to live her life or worse to pretend that she has all figured out about Historia. She knows nothing about her.

"Suit yourself. But I would clearly let go of someone whom I don't see future with"

"Well that's good you're not the one who is in the relationship." Historia answered, already feeling irritation growing in her. She immediately leaves the living room, not even looking back at Annie. When she enters the hall, Historia hears Reiner cursing at someone. She tilted her head to the place, where familiar voice came from.

"You're really here? With this lateness I was hoping you wouldn't come"

"I know it's flattering that I made time for your party Reiner. Now, don't jump over your heels." There she was. Just joined the party and already getting into arguments.

Ymir was wearing the black dress she bought at the store. The dress looked on her surprisingly elegant. Though, it seemed a little short, it shows too much of her long graceful legs.
 Her short hair was almost reaching shoulders and did she always look this radiant or was there something in the air, Historia did not understand.

"Fancy seeing you here." Ymir offeres lopsided smile.

She doesn't seem to be bothered or upset by Historia's act up at cafe. Or maybe she's just that good with pretending she's okay how people mistreat her.

When Historia was about to answer her, Reiner appears from nowhere and pulls her to his side.

"Try to not break something here, I'm sure you cannot repair it." 

Ymir weirdly looks at Reiner's hand on Historia's waist. Slowly dragging her eyes from hand placement, she ignores Reiner's bait for the first time like she didn't hear it.

"All right, everybody. Let's party like there is no tomorrow." Reiner shouts to the crowd making everyone go wild. DJ turns on the ear-spitting music as soon as he hears that party is starting. 
Reiner vanished into crowd of ready to get wasted teenagers. Historia stands, leaning on the wall with her one boot. 

"Ape is a better dancer than him" Ymir says with a straight face.

It brings to Historia's face an uncontrollable smile. "Is an expert talking?"

"You wound me deep, Goldie." Ymir falsely pretends to be stabbed in her chest."You know my dancing skills are ten times better than whatever this is" with those words Ymir starts to throw her hands in air, moving her hips from one side to other, mimicking Reiner's movements. Her arms were wiggling like a wet spaghetti. Then, she bounced on her knees in opposite directions, like someone who really, really needed the bathroom. 

That was the last drop. Historia cannot hold it anymore, she falls into hysterics. Even when it felt like all air was sucked out of her lungs she couldn't stop laughing. The way Ymir looks ridiculously confident, while doing the most hideous movements known to men, should be illegal. At some point, she could feel the spreading pain in her jaw.

She never felt this good.

"Woah, easy there."Ymir worryingly looked at Historia.

Even when Ymir stopped dancing while a go, Historia couldn't resist cackle for a good two minutes.

Wiping away her tears, she looked at Ymir. The most wonderful colour of hazel eyes looked at her back. Suddenly, the blaring music in the background faded away. It felt like there were no one else, just two of them. Historia wouldn't have this moment framed, if she could have.

Ymir gently leaned in closer and whispered "Want to dance for real?"

She suddenly realized that slow dance was playing and everyone around were gently swaying from side to side.
When she opened her mouth to answer, Reiner unexpectedly appeared from Ymir's back.

"Babe, care to dance?"

It seemed like no choice could have been more obvious. 

She glared at heartbreak in Ymir's eyes as Historia took Reiner's hand.

Historia cannot risk any doubts to realness of her relationship when there were full room of witnesses. Even if she has a good bond with Ymir, it doesn't mean that she will let her family down. She knows her place better than anything.

Reiner's gaze was fully focused on Historia, while she was blankly looking at nothing. He had her hands on his chest because she did not fully reached his neck. Meanwhile, his one hand was on her waist and the other clung to her back bringing her closer. 

She could feel a longing eyes on her back as she vanishes into crowd of dancing couples.

After some time, Historia left to bathroom to take a breath. Holding onto sink she looked at her reflection. Some of water droplets slowly slid down her cheek to her neck. Then someone appeared on the mirror.

"Fun party we're having here, aren't we?" Ymir dryly asked, washing her hands.

"Shit no. Someone get the fuck me out of here." Historia grunted. Her words sounded blurry.

"Are ... are you drunk?"Ymir asked with confusion.

"No, of course not. Reiss do not get fully drunk. We just uhh.. taste a bit of it" 

"I see"

Even though, Historia wasn't fully drunk, she stood a little wobbly. Ymir fixated her eyes to Historia's face.There were some wet hair sticked to her forehead. Before Ymir's consciousness could react, her hand brushed the hair behind her ear. Her hand stayed there more than neccessary, slightly caressing her cheek. It seemed like there was some unexplainable sadness in Historia's eyes. The reason Ymir never deserved to hear, apparently.

When their gazes met, Historia grabbed Ymir by her neck and pulled into a kiss.

Ymir's body jolted to a unexpected gesture. Eyes widened to it's full limit, her mind went totally blank, refusing to believe this is the reality she is in right now. A cold numbness flood throught her body, yet, she slowly melts into her touch and her hand found its way to other's waist. 

Ymir's lips were desperately pressing on other's. She lets Historia to hungrily kiss her, not minding when her back touched a cold tiles. 

Blond girl tilts her face a bit to the left, so she can devour Ymir at the fight angle. The whole bathroom was full of wet sounds of their kisses. Her lips tasted a bittersweet grapes, probably from a whiskey or alcohol she was drinking before. Maybe that's why Ymir felt getting intoxicated by her kiss. 

When they pull back for an air, Ymir's eyes locked on Historia, but she is staring at how pink, plumply Ymir's lips gotten from an intense kiss. Ymir is leaning lower so their foreheads touch. It is asimple gesture, but feels so intimite. Historia looks up to and sucks her lower lip. Ymir already wants to kiss her again. Those beautiful lips, she just tasted, lean in and start to kiss her down on her neck. She slowly slid her hands on Ymir's hips. 

Ymir did not had any choice, but to moan, when she bit her collarbone. She never could have thought the pain would give such pleasure. The satisfying goosebumps run over her body. Once she bit, Historia started to lick it, sliding her soggy tongue up to the jawline.

Her face heat up from explicit touches, her legs started shaking. If Historia lets her hold of Ymir even a little bit, she is scared that she falls.

In a sudden motion, Historia grabs her face and turns left making her face press the tiles as well, giving Historia full access of her neck.Ymir never felt more naked despite being fully clothed in her life. Well, what can you expect from a queen bee. They always get what they demand. 

And Ymir is willing to dutifully give whatever her queen asks.

The door creak makes them realize that they're still at the party full of people. Historia jerks from Ymir, looking to the door's direction to know who it was. A buff guy from Reiner's football team opens the door wide open, just as his mouth. His hand falls from the handle. 

"Uhh.." He stupidly stands there.

Historia quickly composes herself, pretending like she wasn't shoving her tongue into her soul five minutes ago.

She slowly approaches him and says, "You did not see anything. If I hear about that it escaped from your mouth, I will make sure you will never be in any football team, let alone Reiner's" 

Her tone seems too threatening and serious for a person in her situation. Even though, she is shorter than him by a foot, her words made him shrink. 

Without even giving Ymir a glance, she exits the bathroom. After heavy silence in the bathroom, he leaves her alone too, Ymir slowly sank down the tiled wall until she reached a floor.

What the fuck just happened?

Chapter Text

This was never the way I planned, not my intention. 

Historia rushed as she exited Reiner's house without any explanation. Good thing, that she didn't see him on her way. Probably drunk, lying in the corner. 

After walking a proper distance from Reiner's house, she finally looked around to find herself in the middle of unknown place. Historia didn't know where she was going, the goal was to escape from that place in any possible way. There were similar penthouses lined next to each other. She probably wouldn't even differentiate them from Reiner's house. But, the way Historia has been walking on, it wasn't complicated nor full of turns, she just walked straight, not even stepping off the path. 

Pain in her head made its presence very clear again. Assumption on a reason was obvious. Music. Yes, she always hated loud music.

Eyes closed, steadying her breath, she stood there for a good whole minute. Historia slowly brushed her mouth with fingertips. Her lips were still feeling an invisible touch on, those cherry flavored chapstick is going to be stuck in her memory for a while now. Soft skin under her palm, felt like justly made clouds, smooth, delicate and very silky. Made her questioning if she was dreaming it. And those noises that escaped through her mouth, sweet songs that caressed her ears? It desperately scratched an itch Historia didn't know she had. Sinful smell of her perfume really played mind games with her. It almost felt like she is still in there, kissing her.

What?

Oh my god. Kissing her? 

She kissed Ymir.

Historia kissed Ymir. Who just happened to be there, when she was the most vulnerable. Shit, Historia was in deep shit. What on Earth could have possessed her to do that? What if Ymir will try to sabotage Historia with it? Trying to promise herself a good life with threatened money, or worse, try to destroy her status, humiliate her publicly in media.

Wait.

What if... what if she tells that to her mother, what happens then? Will she be disappointed? Angry? Relieved? Because it will give her a proper excuse of annihilating her. She will probably say, she had no idea about it. 

No. Anxiety is clouding her mind. There is no way Ymir would have any courage in her entire life, to encounter her. Exact opposite, it will only make Ymir center of attention in this mess, and with her father's powers she would never risk her quiet life. And if she does, she will make her regret it, until the end of her life in this town. 

Alcohol really tangled her thoughts, to just think, no, imagine that she would kiss Ymir so recklessly, when anyone could enter the bathroom anytime is beyond stupidity. Which, exactly how it happened. 

Massaging her temples, Historia looks around to have a mere image of where she is located. With her luck, she could have easily escape all this, if Historia cared enough to visit Reiner's house more regularly. Relief spread across her body, when she remembered, that she could have just call her driver, to take her home. Except, since the beginning of the party, it has roughly passed an hour and a half. If she returns early and without Reiner taking her home, it will seed some questions in her mother's mind. Which will definitely lead to calling Reiner, and that pitiful excuse of a person will reveal the truth without even thinking. Relief swiftly vanished just as quickly it appeared. Well, she really avoided of going to that place, but clearly she wasn't rich in options.

All of a sudden, she hears a person screaming her name from a distance. Historia turns to the sound, but not walking to it, just to check who it is. After a few attempts to guess, to whom that voice belongs to, she figures it out. 

Of course it's her. 

"Historia? I finally found you." Ymir slowly appeared from a narrow gap between the buildings. There was a hesitant smile on her expression. Ymir fully roamed Historia's body, as to check, if everything was okay with her. 

"What do you want" Historia interrupted with a sharp voice, when Ymir was about to start a conversation between them. If there was a slight smile on her face before, now it completely faded away. A faint frown knitted her eyebrows together.

"I.. I was just trying to check up on you. You suddenly left." She put her hand behind her back, pretending to caress it. Even with all evidence that her presence wasn't welcome here, she still tried to make her talk. 

"I just left, so what? Did someone make you follow me?" 

"What? No-no. Why would you think so?"

"Well, why are you here for then?" Historia folded her arms, clearly unimpressed.

A blush spread across her face, matching her slightly ruined lipstick. "Ah, well, you know, about what happened earlier" Ymir thought, once mentioned it, Historia would take the hint and elaborate already. But, she wasn't nearly amused.

So Ymir continued, "You kissed me." The almost whisper left her mouth. If they weren't standing so close to each other, Historia might've not catch what she has said at all. But, despite being spoon-fed, she didn't rush to explain anything. Her stare was digging a hole in Ymir.

"And?"

A brief pause.

"What?" 

Why was Ymir acting so stupid, suddenly? Can't she see how much of a scene, she's creating right now? A flicker of anger started burning her lungs inside.

"Oh my god." Two fingers started circling side of her head through hair. That headache was killing her. " You know what? Just take it. Don't let this be longer than it has to," with those words, Historia awaitingly looks at Ymir. But, she obviously prefers to keep the circus on, untill the end. Hats off to role commitment.

"Your card number, please?" She asked fakely smiling. "Or, are you one of those people who want cash? If that's the case, sorry I don't have it right now. As you can see I only have my phone with me. But, if you're willing to wait, I will get your money on next the school day. I assume you're not rushing about it? You don't have ill grandma or beating dad story with you, do you? Because if you do, I assure you they won't work on me-" 

"What the heck are you talking about?" Ymir finally snapped, after blankly looking at her, not understanding a single word from her chatter. It was her turn to look wildly fierce. 

"Not enough money?" Oh Historia was pouring oil straight to the fire. 

"You think all of that was for money? Are you kidding me?"

"Of course, what for then? Don't tell me u love me or something." Historia smirked. But, after glancing at Ymir's disappointed face, her heart, for some reason, clenched. Just one sight of that was enough, to reconsider what she has just said. Ymir's glassy eyes were somehow still disbelievingly staring at her, clinging to a fragile hope in her chest, that, no, she didn’t mean anything she said. She's just playing a cruel joke.

Historia clenched the the sleeve of her dress, digging her nails through it. Not from anger, but from a guilt, a reason for it, she has to find out yet.

Quickly stepping closer to Historia, she started shaking her with arms on her shoulders."Historia, snap out of it! Don't lie to yourself. If you possibly don't have feelings for me, why to spend time with me? Why to... kiss me?" Every word was longing in the air between them.

Then, Historia said something that cannot be repaired.

"I just pitied you. I knew it was one of two things you wanted from me, money or lay. My mom warned about people like you-"

"Enough" Ymir cried. "I am fed up by your bullshit. Your filthy mouth doesn't do anything, but lie. And, I thought I could help you, you know? But you don't let me."

Historia dared to look straight into Ymir's eyes while saying that, but once Ymir cut her speech jn the middle, she stayed quiet for real. Maybe, she had no idea what she was saying since the beginning, or weight of that knowledge just striked her.

Ymir's jaw tightened, she took her hands from Historia's shoulders, like she was on fire and Ymir's fingers got burned from it.

"People like me you say? What kind? Why don't you continue?" Ymir halfly grinned. 

"C'mon, you wanted to say, what? Poor or a whore? Or is it lesbian? Or people that have low value of themselves, that they would sell their self-respect for anything? Did I hit it? Ohhh, I think I hit it." 

This time, Historia didn’t say anything, just standing there, as Ymir was circling around her. Ymir inched closer, whispering, "At least I am not a coward" 

She stepped off, now increasing her voice, "At least I don't try to buy everyone, assuming worst in them. At least, I don't lie to myself and I admit what I want in life. Now tell me Historia, what do you want?" 

Ymir harshly grabbed her chin to make her look straight into her eyes.

"Tell me that, you haven't been playing this game your whole life"

Their stare met on a halfway of cruel battle, each of them refusing to lose. But, only single person really is stating facts and the other just believes they are. That's why Historia's eyes flicker, before slowly looking down. She doesn't say anything, she doesn't have to.

"Thought so." Ymir slowly steps back.

"Now if you excuse me, I will take my presence out of here," with mockery in her voice, she turned back and left.

Historia watched her back till it vanished. Once there was no sight of her, Historia's throat filled with a heavy pain. Her vision started to get blurry. Salty droplets slide down her cheek, one after another, countless times. 

Her legs were trembling and after few seconds, she fell on the grass on her knees. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders and lied there, miserable, lost, and alone. Somehow, with shaking legs, she stumbled to the only place she could think of.

The door ring filled the penthouse. It was sure big house for one person in it. But, her parents could not let their first child have a tiny apartment. With all of their power and money, it would be shame to not spend it on their beloved daughter. That's what everyone would think. Everyone who did not know her.

When she turned 18, her first choice of a career was a lawyer. Studying all day long, till her fingers burned from pain, till her body collapsed from tiredness to pay her studies, even though, she had a privilege, as her parents, was enough information to respect her as a person. Responsibility, hard work, saving money were three golden rules to get her a life she is living right now.

Once, the owner heard the doorbell, she rushed to open the door, coming down the stairs.

"Just a second" 

As soon as doors were opened, Freida saw her little sister, Historia, in front of her. Smile vanished from her face at the same speed it appeared. There was no face on her, red eyes, hair messy, pumped lips.

"Hey, hey. Everything is okay now. Come here." Freida slowly wrapped her arms around her, brushing her back, up and down. She had no idea what happened with her, but one thing was clear, Historia was in need of comfort, and if she came here looking for it, Freida will give it to her. Then, when she calms down enough to talk again, she will explain herself, even if she doesn't, her older sister is still here for her, anyway. 

They were standing in the door frame, not moving an inch, until Historia stopped shivering. When, Historia lossened her grip on her shoulders, Freida finally looked at her. With the side of her hand, she wiped her tears away. Historia felt light touch of her lips on her forehead.

Freida handed her cup of tea, while taking her seat on the sofa near her. Patience was key and she knew it. In those kind of situation, she better not attack with questions, even if she's very curious. With whom Historia became close, that their words hurted her so much. 

"Feeling better?" Frieda offered a soft smile.

"Yes." Her face was didn't reflect her smile, but getting a vocal response was something already. " Don't get full of yourself, you were not my first choice. You were just the closest place I could go and it's our driver's day off." 

As always, she immediately started to defend herself, building a wall between to not let Freida close. Just a thought of that hurted. Because, they were very close in their childhood. Always playing together, laughing, messing around. Even if Freida's mother didn't approve of her going to her husband's second wives place, she was kind enough to not interfere. 

Freida's little siblings were jealous to share her with Historia, but she made sure to divide her time equally. One day, Freida arrived from university to just hear that Historia doesn't want to see her ever again. Frieda has no idea what they told her to mess her thoughts, nevertheless, she could not change that. When Historia became a teenager, they started talking again, but the damage was done.

"I know, honey. Now, can you tell me what happened?" 

Her eyes darted around the room, as if right answer would appear. "I think I hurted someone's feelings." 

"Can you explain further? I can't help you if I don't know what happened" 

Sigh escaped her mouth. She clenched cup in her hands and started explaining everything. It was nice to hear that Historia still cares enough to come here for advice, even though she will never admit that out loud.

Freida grabbed a handful of her hair to tuck it behind her ear." You care a lot about her, huh?" 

That was not what Historia expected to hear, apparently. Because her body became tense.

"What? Not that much as you think. It's just..." Historia always talks quieter when she tries to deny something. That draws a chuckle from Frieda. 

"Okay Hisu, can you tell me, what did you feel when you kissed her-"

"I told you I just did that because I was drunk."

"Are you drunk now? Because you certainly don't seem like that." 

That shuts her up.

"Hisu, you know it's okay to like her."

"No, you don't understand. I'm not" she takes a pause, "a lesbian."

Freida sighed. It will take a lot of time.

"Okay if you say you're not a lesbian, then you aren't. It's completely your decision. But I also don't want you to get confused, which you are right now." 

Silence wraps around the room. But this time, it's not from avoidance to answer, but from carefully rethinking what she has to say.

"I guess the reason, I let her to get close was that she seemed very genuine. Like she wouldn't use me. But after.. after I kissed her, I was in panic that she would use that against me."

"You trusted her but you had your doubts, right?"

Historia nods.

"Okay, other than that. While you two spent time together, was there something that caught your attention?"

"Hm, she has pretty good jokes I guess. One time she almost got Rejner believing that he is color-blind. Teaming up with everyone in the class to say the same." The small smile tucked her lips."She's blunt as hell. She once told Sasha to not hide her real accent, and if people who made fun of her for that, they can go to hell. She's also kind. To me, at least." When Historia moved her head right, to look at Freida, because she was really quiet. She saw that Freida has very mischievous, teasing smile on her.

"Oh, don't stop, continue, please."

Historia punched her with all force she had. Great. Now, she will not let her live, reminding her this speech until end of her day, probably. 

"I'm kidding, stop pouting." Freida chuckled, grabbing her arm that was just hit. Bruise is guaranteed. But she quickly changes to seriousness and asks the eating question. "Hisu, why did you kiss her?"

Historia didn't notice how her face was heated up, the whole conversation. That, she had a stupid grin on her face. All caused by Ymir. Just a talk about her could put her in a better mood. If she only realized sooner how much Ymir meant to her. How much she misses her, her smile, hugs, jokes, everything. She would give anything to be with her, touch her hair, caress her soft sun-kissed skin, be in her embrace and-

Oh.

Oh.

"Frieda, I kissed her, because I like her. I like girls, but more importantly I like Ymir and only her. I wanted to do it for so long and that alcohol gave me a little courage for it. And, now I miss her so much. My heart hurts, when I remember, what I have done to her. Horrible words, I wish I never said." After saying it outloud, a heavy weight off her chest. Like she can breath normally. Realization hit her like a truck. Unbelievable. How blind she could be?. Shock doesn't leave her body for a while. It feels like the information she always knew, but she was too afraid to admit it to herself.

Freida softly looked at her. "What do you plan to do with it?" 

"I will apologize. Beg her to take me. Even though, probably I don't deserve her. But, I am selfish. I want her to be mine, only. I stopped lying to myself about things I want. And, now I want her." After a sudden pause, she continues, "Maybe that makes me a bad person, but I could not care less. I'm the one who can make Ymir happy and If she forgives me, I won't leave her again."

"Hey, hey. If you two are meant to be, she will. Love has second chances." Freida reassured her, embracing her in a tight hug.

"Just, this time, don't try to be like your mother. Okay?"

A wave of tremors rippled through her. But she won't let it stop her. She is scared, but she also has strong feelings for Ymir. And Histroia wants her to know that her feelings overpowers those fears.

"Okay"

Chapter Text

Sunlight streamed through the curtains, landing on Historia's face. She scrunched a nose in annoyance. Right, when she was getting into total comfort from whole night fidgeting, it's already morning. Not an inch of her body wanted to leave the bed today. That's why she instantly covered her face with white blanket. 

For a few minutes, she tried to fall asleep again, diving far away from what day is preparing for her. But that was exactly why she needs to get out of bed. The consequences of all mess she has done is waiting for her. Giving up, she half-sat up stretching her arms. Only after a minutes of brooding, she noticed how house is filled with delicious smell of pancakes. Lopsided smile appeared on her, as she decided to be shown in the kitchen.

Just like Historia had guessed, Freida was standing at the oven, with a tip of her tongue sticking out, because she was too concentrated to make smiley face on pancakes. 

It always bothered Historia how her half-sister pours soul and body into everything she did. Once, she started something, nothing else mattered. It was a habit from childhood, Freida used to make dresses for Historia's dolls. And, no matter how many times her fingers get pricked, she would continue sewing like nothing had happened. It was due to the reason to please everyone around her, or she was trying to prove herself something, Historia didn't know. Still, it was pretty admirable from a far, how she can accomplish the perfection every each time. Though, Historia will never admit it out loud.

"I'm awake." Historia mumbles her way to the fridge.

Freida obviously flinches from the sound, but sweetly smiles after. "Good morning, did you sleep well?" 

Ugh, she has always been such a early bird. It pisses Historia off to no end. 

"Well? Yeah, right." She grabbed a bottle of ice-cold water and poured it into a cup. That should help her.

"Did I wake you up?" Historia didn't like how worrisome she sounded. It was so her, to believe somehow she carried all of the weight on her shoulders. 

"No, it's not you. Just couldn't sleep."

"I'm sorry to hear it" Freida comes close and kisses her forehead and Historia just lets her." Breakfast is ready, go clean up."

It took a lot longer to come back to the kitchen, because she stared at her reflection with a horrified expression. Her eyes are completely swollen due to the lack of sleep — or crying. Maybe, both. Dark purple eyebags formed beneath them. No wonder, Freida was frightened to see her. But alas, it didn't bother her, as much it would in the past.

Silence wrapped around the room, while they were having breakfast. In the middle, Freida decided to say what was in her mind, after all.

"Your mother called." 

Historia's hand, with a fork, frozen in the midair. She sighed slowly and looked away.

"What did she say?" What a stupid question.

"Asked if you were here with me. Apparently, she called Reiner first, but he said that he hadn't seen you all night." 

"What did you tell her?" 

"I told her to never call this number again." 

As soon as those words left Freida's mouth, Historia looked up, with a surprised face. It was visible that she was choosing between what to say. After a brief pause, her hesitation shifted and she stood from her chair to Freida's direction. Before she could say anything, tight arms wrapped around her waist. 

"Hisu? What-"

"Nothing is wrong," she muttered into her shoulder. They both let out a harsh exhale when Freida hugs her back, warm hands brushing up and down. "I just want to say that, I'm really grateful, I guess."

"You don't have to thank me for putting your mother in her place, you know." 

"It's not only that. You always have been so kind to me. Everyday after school the only reason I rushed home was to see you. I used to beg my mother to let me go your house. She was so annoyed." Historia sniffed and readjusted her position to loft her face, but her eyes were wandering around. "A-and, when you left to study abroad, she used that chance to put me against you. She told me you left me forever. That you don't love me."

"That was never true, Hisu. I left, because I needed to become better. But, I always had my family in my heart." A hand, warm and reassuring, caressed Historia’s face. Taking her to the blissful days, they spent together.

"I know, that's why I am sorry. I can't believe I fell into that stupid lie. But, most importantly, I can't believe, even after you returned it was clear that you missed me and I stayed mad at you anyway. I am so mad at myself. You deserve an apology." It was eating her alive those past years. Something felt so obvious, yet, didn't leave her mouth. 

"It's okay. I was never upset with you in the first place."

The hesitant smile tugged Historia's face. As always, so kind, so generous and so damn forgiving. Even though, Historia was convinced she didn't deserve any of it, but, she took it all. The clingy, ugly creature in her chest was taking it all, pleased.

They always were opposite to each other. One, who never got tired of giving and the other never felt shame for taking. Historia could never be near sacrificing like her. Histroia was selfish, arrogant, imperious. But, that was okay. As long as there is no liar in that line, she can live with the other qualities.

After a quite emotional morning, Historia decided it would be the best to not skip school today, regardless of Freida's encounters. If she will delay it furthermore, situation might escalate. Historia fidgeted in her seat when she saw the school in sight. 

"You can still stay, if you want." Freida parked on the road and offered a gentle smile.

"No, I'm going." Historia paused looking at school. "It's now or never."

"Alright, then good luck" with those words, Freida planted a tender kiss on her face. She gave her sister last look before, entering the school.

Her eyes were scanning the hall for a freckled face. Her heart thundered like a war drum in her chest. As she moved forward, the walls seemed to creep inward, squeezing the air from her lungs. Suddenly, she realized, she didn’t think it through. Of course, goal was obvious. But, she didn't make a strategic plan for it. It's not like she is some genius to create one and all the consequences of her speech will be the same anyway. Well, not exactly all of. That part counted on sincerity and her new found feelings.

But all those thoughts vanished from her mind the moment she found her. With an increased speed, she rushed towards her, not even caring a bit, if she knocked someone down on the way. Just when she was about to reach her, Ymir's eyes lifelessly gave Historia glance and entered the classroom like she saw nothing.

Okay, well deserved. But, from that possibility of Ymir not wanting to see her ever again, her heart torn apart into a million pieces, like it was put into a blender. Her shoulders dropped and she put an hand on her chest. She wasn't looking like a queen bee right now, more likely a kitten left out in the rain. With a sound of a school bell she walked into class too.

Whole lesson she has been intensively staring at her side. Hoping maybe she will slip up and spare her a tiniest glance. But she remained as steady. And, damn Historia missed having her around. Always starting a day with a chatter in the background became a routine she never knew they arranged. Ymir would say something stupid to Reiner and Historia would pretend she wasn't listening, but subsequently laughs. Only if it's still possible to return everything back. But, Ymir must've really hate her now. Could you blame her? Anyone sane would hate Historia in her place, and even wonder why it took her that long for it. They would ask Historia why was she trying to talk to her, if she, herself, admitted that her actions are unforgivable? Simple answer. Historia is selfish and will not tolerate just watching how person she cares about will distance from her. At least not without a voiced confirmation that Ymir doesn't want her around.

After the lesson, she attempted few times to talk to her and she finally caught her talking with Hitch.

"Hey, Ymir."

But the answer didn't come, instead Hitch greeted her.

"Hey, Historia." 

"If you don't mind can you leave us alone?" Her tone completely changed from when she talked to Ymir. Hitch felt the thick tension between them. Not having a mood for arguments, she said good bye to Ymir and left.

"Ymir?" Soft voice cut through the silence that stretched too long. "Can we talk?"

"I don't think there is something to talk about." Ymir said coldly. "Yesterday, you made it clear that you don't want to have something in common with someone like me." Each words sliced her heart into pieces. Making it drown in its own blood. When she did not give a responce, Ymir looked over and added, "I have some plans to take care of. Good bye, Historia." Such a blunt lie. But, it was a fair game. If Historia can get away with lies, Ymir will, too. 

Fragile ego of hers never has been mortified like that in her whole life. That stinging feeling of humiliation filled up her body. Yet, no matter how utterly ridiculous it sounded, Ymir's rejection wounded her deeper than any of it. The mere thought of Ymir's hatred towards her, made her want to cry in the corner, hugging her legs. And, now, after rejection, it was a clear sign of giving up. Let go that person. Because, it was obvious that she doesn't want anything from you. Your ways got separated. But, Historia knew Ymir. Maybe, not for one hundred percent, still, well enough to notice that she misses her. There was a sparkle of hope in those longing eyes, they were waiting for something. To Historia prove her words with actions too afraid of getting betrayed like that again. She thinks if she opens her heart again, it will never recover from the wound that might come after. 

Okay, Historia can work with that. Now, when she got a proof that she stands a chance, there's nothing that will hold her back. Regardless of the price.

"Finally figured it out for yourself?" Some voice brought Historia back to reality. Looking over her shoulder she saw Reiner sadly smiling at her.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you always had such a soft spot for Ymir." He crossed his arms.

"Always? No, it was few days ago-"

"C'mon Krista. You don't really believe that." Reiner was truly thinking that Historia is joking with her until he saw her dumbfounded expression.

"You always hang out together and week ago you came wearing her jacket. Don't tell me you'd hope no one noticed. Even Ymir did, but she didn't say anything."

Historia couldn't deny that one, but she didn't have a long crush on her.

"Historia you don't let people in. You have never talked to Sasha, Jean or Connie, even though we're on the same class since 6th grade. Heck, the only reason we talked was that you had to because I'm playing your boyfriend. You hate being close to someone, but you let Ymir to hang on you, touch you." 

Reiner heavily sighs. "Always wished it was me."

Only now, replaying every memories Historia realizes how she really got close with Ymir throughout the years. No one could pull them apart. Historia was lying to herself so long, saying that it's only Ymir that follows her everywhere, Historia actually forgot that she didn't rush to just end their conversation. Or, to leave her.

Now, thinking about it, it was so obvious, how could people still believe that Reiner and Historia were dating.

"I think it was just matter of time when you two get together. Even knowing that I clung to you." He looks very devastated but still wears a smile on his face.

He coughs, realizing how he sounds right now. Sadness flickers and he pulls himself together.

"Anyways, I'm happy that I got to play this with you. You were special to me. Thank you for your time." He offers his hand.

"Me too, Reiner. I hope you find your person." She gives her hand, but Reiner takes it and kisses it delicately. It surprises Historia for sure. Yet, she lets him have this. Even though, they weren't right for each other, he is a good person after all. 

Chapter Text

Historia is going to die now.

And no, that is not a bit of an exaggeration. The thing is, after school she decided to commite a suicide or, to be more precise she decided to try to talk with mother. Because last attempts were so successful that she had to try again. Hilarious, isn't it? That woman hears nothing but a wallet. That's exactly why Historia is listening to yet, another earful. 

"Where were you wandering around?! I told you yesterday that party is a great opportunity for you to get closer to their family! You might have get some useful information from that imbecile of yours. Do you want us to go bankrupt?!" She grinding her teeth, eyes wide as if they're ready to pop out of orbit, clenching her fists. 

Historia is already feeling the sickness forming in her stomach from this scene. Every god damn day, it is the same. Can't she just skip this part and go to her room already? And, since when it was her obligation to keep the company on board? 

 "And the day before that, Reiner's parents came to say good bye. And you weren't home either. We should always be on good terms! Even on their short absence. Now they already left- are you even listening to me?"

Her mother noticed how Historia is just standing there with a dull eyes without any responce. Before the situation escalated even more, Historia made her way to her room. Mumbling through her teeth "You did not tell me that Reiners are coming."

"What was that? Speak louder for God's sake." She grabbed Historia's arm tightly to not let her leave the conversation.

"You didn't not tell me anything about that! Maybe that's because you were too busy licking Tybur's feet or it's just you never talk to me at all!" After holding it for so long, she finally lost it. She snacthed her hand away from her grip and when she was about to look right into her mother's eyes, she slapped her face.

"How dare to accuse me of such things. Me and your father gave you everything and yet you are ungrategul!"She grabbed her chin with full force, nails digging into her cheeks. 

It hurted. 

It hurts. 

Of course Historia didn't say that. The last 17 years of her life, those words proved to be useless to pronounce, because who was she talking to, if there's no ears to listen?

"I am your mother and you do not talk to me like that!" The anger in her eyes was indescribable, maybe that's the first time in her life when she got a proper response of her action from her. 

 Are you? was all that she wanted to ask right now, but didn't dare. She doesn't want to piss her off more than she did already and bickering pointless anyway. The burning pain on her cheek was a proof of that.

" Go to your room, I don't want to see your face right now." She yanked away her with force she fell onto cold ceramic tiles. Historia didn't see her face but she was sure that her mother making that face full of hatred again. As if it ever changed. 

No. This cannot continue no more. There is no love that her mother could ever give to her and running after fictitious affection gives her nothing, but a pain of waiting. 

"You are no mother of mine!" The loud echo of those words bounced to the bare walls of the house. The motion and time itself froze, leaving the lingering mood of agony and despair.

The older woman stopped walking and slowly turned her head towards Historia to make sure she heard everything right. 

"What." The only word slipped through her mouth, in disbelief she didn't even do anything. Just stood there.

"You were never my mother and I refuse to follow your orders like some minion you can enslave. Even since my childhood, you hated me. I know you did. All of those years ignoring my existence and then when you realized I could be useful for you, you started commanding me." With all her strength within her, she stated what her mind had been gulping down for a decade. You may say that they're roles are reversed now, but only if she could keep silent.

"You have the audacity-"

"Shut your mouth!" High pitched voice cut off her speech. The speed she said it with, made her mother flinch a little bit. She shouted that with the all air in her lungs. Because, that's what was needed, to make her listen. "I am not done yet!"

When it was clear that she is not planning on interrupting again, Historia continued, now standing and looking right into her eyes as an equal she felt for the first time.

"You did anything possible to make my life miserable, like your absence in it wasn't enough. Oh, but I was a fool. I wish to return those days when you didn’t give a shit about my life, because you entering my life was the most hideous thing you have done to me, after giving birth to me." A couple of teardrop slides her cheekbones to the neckline. It wasn't from sadness which many people would assume, those emotions were killed by that women long time ago. Now when Historia talked to her, she doesn't feel anything but disgust.

"I just don't understand why. Why did you stay, when you could have leave my life for good?You made me hate Freida, you made me lose all my friends swearing they were fake! I grew up alone. And, just yesterday I had a fight with the only woman that truly cared about me! Why?" Historia asked, clencing her jaw.

"Answer me!" As soon as Historia yelled that, she regretted it. Because, looking at her, she didn't see any motherly guilt. She wasn't even phased by this.

"You think you are doing something with little act of yours? You always was such a miserable brat. Bleaching your eyes off to your father. Acting all innocent. But I see the real you." She scrunched her nose up, her lips making a thin, upside-down line. "You are desperate for male attention, flirting with the guests, wearing those slutty short-"

Her words were cut off with a resounding slap. A little gasp escaped from the older woman's mouth, as she did not expected that. Her eyes widened. Grabbing her reddened cheek, she stared at the monster she created.

All of a sudden, instead of yelling even more at her, Historia cackled.A crooked smile split her face just before the laughter spilled, high-pitched and grating, like glass splintering. When the older woman thought she imagined the sound, Historia uncontrollably laughed holding her head in-between. It was not a usual titter, but a sound one made when they were starting to lose their mind. There sounds were scratching ears from inside. Her laughter faltered, breaking in abrupt bursts, and when it finally stilled, she spoke again.

"I think I finally got it. It is all because you hate yourself. You were never given or taken love in your life. Dad never loved you, neither did you. All you cared about was money. When you got it, your greed didn't let you stop just there. You had to stay, you had to marry him. And, even that, didn't guarantee you anything, you saw how dad looked at other women, but you weren't sad because he didn't love you, the fear of being left with no money was beyond that. And all of that hatred for yourself deflected on me. Because, younger, more beautiful girl than you had it all, really set a fire of jealousy in you." Chest heavily falling and rising again. Every sentence were said in one beat, she didn't stumble or think what to say. Historia finally saw the real, fragile, ugly, needy creature she could never call a mother.

"Pathetic. Only to think that, once I dreamed to deserve your love." The last words stinged stronger than it should have. Pitiful expression on, Historia walked off to her room, leaving her to stare at her back. 

Absolute relief crushed her body when she entered her room. Something heavy in her throat finally disappeared. All this years, she had been foolishly scared of her. What a way to waste your life. But starting with today everything will change. 

Satisfied with herself, she jumped into her matrass. Better tomorrow is waiting for Historia.

Few days later on, Ymir looks around for possible blond girl chasing after her. When, she doesn't find it, she mentally gets upset over it. Not that she needed her, but the thought of her giving up that early somehow pitifully stings her. Maybe, Ymir overrated her place in Historia's world.

"Will you finish that?" Sasha's voice interrupted her inner monolog. Making her realize that she is in the cafeteria with Sasha.

"You can have it, I lost my appetite." Ymir scrunched her nose, and pushed the scrambled eggs towards her. Sasha jump into it, like starving for a decade now.

When Sasha is done with chewing, she starts to speak, "What is with you Ymir? You are so quiet." 

"Eh? There is nothing wrong. Why would you even think so?"

"Well, you have been staring at me, while I am eating with a straight face. Usually you look away in disgust."

Ymir has nothing to say against it. Their conversation fades into silence again.

"Is it about Historia? I can help, you know."

Ymir falls into hysterics, laughing so hard it feels like her lungs might burst. With one hand she hits the table with a force repeatedly. When, she steadies her breath and wipes the tear off, Ymir sees that Sasha is dead serious.

"Wait. Are you for real?"

"O-of course, I am. Why was that so funny!" Her face heats up from embarrassment.

"Oh, I don't know maybe because you never talk about anyone? Your world circle around food, Sasha."

"Actually..." Sasha gulps the rest of the foold in one and continues, "I know, I am not a gamer. But, I have someone."

"Oh, really?" Ymir longs the every letter, in disbelief.

"Look over there." Sasha points to the food counter. "Can you a tall blondie over there."

Ymir sighs, but looks at the direction anyway. A young, blond boy comes jnto view, working in the servine line. Giving food to the crowd of hungry teenagers."Yeah, so what?" 

"Well, for several weeks, he has been giving me free extra portions." Sasha says like she won a lottery of million dollars. "And, the other day he asked me out."

Shocked, Ymir was about to brush it off, but that guy actually peered at them. When he realized that Sasha was already peering at him, he shyly waved.

"What the hell? If he works at school as a cook, isn't too old for you?"

"What? No, it is his part time job. He moved into town recently and wants to save for apartment. Niccolo is only few years older." Sasha waves back to him.

"You already know a lot about him, huh?" Ymir teases.

Her face heats up. "Well, I told you he asked me out. And, Ymir... For the love of potato. He's a food genius. His hands are kissen by an angel! Everything he makes is literally perfect." The last words came out like a sobbing, so, everyone stare at Ymir weirdly. She worriedly looks around and grabs Sasha by her shoulders.

"Okay, Sasha. I got it. Stop yelling. If you he's a great guy, then he is."

"Thank you for approving, it means a lot to me." Sasha calms down a little bit and looks at Ymir, anticipated.

"What?"

"Aren't you gonna share your love problem? Don't deny having one!"

Sasha looks too determined to back off right now. Guess, she doesn't have a choice. "Listen, it was just me and Historia bickering."

"About..?"

Her chest rises and falls in heavy sigh."She lies to herself. I can see that. She can think of me whatever, but I am no fool. It hurted me Sasha. I thought we were close enough for her to trust me. That was so pathetic of me." 

"What did she lie about?"

"I..I can't tell you that and especially not here. I'm sorry."

"That's okay. Totally. I just want you to talk about it to someone. So I'm here to listen. And one thing I am sure, if the both people love each other, they have to accept the other one with the flaws. But if the flaws are ignored by that person, you cannot do anything, but to let go. If they come back, they're yours." Sasha brightly smiles while tightly cupping Ymir's hands in her own. Immediate chuckle escapes from Ymir.

"What is it?"

"No, nothing. I just don't want to get all mushy or something."

Ymir wasn't the friendliest person Sasha knows, but, one thing was clear, she has the friendliest heart of all.

"Are you okay now?"

"A bit. I just wish I didn't care so much-

"Attention please!" High pitched voice called out, drawing everyone's focus on her. From the gathered crowd, you couldn't tell who was speaking. However, Ymir did.

Two buff guys helped her to stand on the table in cafeteria. Unless, no one would see her. "I have an important message for you all to hear. So, prepare your phone cameras. It better be viral by tomorrow." Ymir and Sasha looked at each, like they had a psychic conversation and decided to walk into the group of people.

"I suppose everyone already knows me but i will remind for people that don't know. I am Historia Reiss. And, I have been lying to everyone." Historia pointed to the crowd and they immediately started whispering gibberish. "Me and the "Walls" football team leader Reiner Broun are in fact not dating. It was an act to gain public interest, nothing more. I do not like him, nor I like any of you. Actually, everyone irritates me." Historia brutally said.

If people were whispering before, now they are clearly boo-ing her straight forward. It is impressive how a person's mind can change within a minute. Some of them were throwing insults at her, some tried to throw food, just to show their disrespect to Historia. But, if you looked at her, no one could say that she is upset. Quite the opposite, she was relieved to finally let it all out.

"I am not done yet!" Historia stomped her boot to the table. "I said everyone irritates me, there is one exception. Ymir." Everyone looked back to see Ymir. Their gazes created an uncomfortable atmosphere in the cafeteria, but Ymir wasn't paying attention to them, she couldn't take her eyes off Historia. Heart beating fast, not fully believing the situation.

"Ymir is the only adequate lerson in this school. She's sincere and cool." Red blossomed on her face, deepening with each heartbeat. "A-and at the party, I kissed her! And I realized she is the only one I want to kiss. Ymir.. I'm sorry for everything I said. I was wrong and scared. When you said I was lying to myself it was an absolute truth, your words just opened the old wounds, so I got defensive. I know it is not an excuse. However I wish for your forgiveness. Because, I-I like you Ymir!" The last part striked like a lightning. Historia got down from the table and slowly approached Ymir. While doing that, they both didn’t break eye contact.

"You said I couldn't admit it to myself, not only I did that, but I said it to the whole crowd."

She cleared her throat and screamed even louder. "I am a lesbian and I like Ymir!" No embarrassment was found in her voice. She was just looking at Ymir like a deer caught on the road. 

Not wanting to be heard, Historia turned around to the people and yelled, "The show is over, get going people." 

Ymir felt a tiny warm hand dragging her along. They were running away from the school cafeteria, leaving people confused and guessing what had just happened. Then, they hurriedly exited the school doors too. Ymir was watching back of Historia's head while they run without a clear destination. 

"Well, what do you say Ymir?" With every word Historia had a full pause to compose her breath. They stopped at a small shop nearby school.

"You really know how to surprise people, Goldie." She said smiling. "I didn't know you had a crush on me." She teasingly looked at Historia, waiting for a sharp response. Instead, she got her shyly looking to the ground.

"I do, have a crush on you Ymir."

Those words strucked her right on the center of her heart, making it beat crazily. Yes, Historia has already shouted it to the crowd, but, this confession felt ten times intimate. Having a vocal confirmation was nice.

"I am really sorry that I said what I said week ago. You were right, I was a coward that was running away from truth. But, now I will never hurt your feelings again. Please, forgive me Ymir." Historia puffed her cheeks in a stubborn pout.

Ymir offered endearing smile. "Yes, your words made me upset." Historia's heart sank. Sounded like a rejection.

"But, you know what hurted me more?" The shorter girl cluelessly shook her head. 

Cute.

"I was so scared that you wouldn't even blink about me disappearing in your life. I think that thought hurted me more than your words. I could never distance myself from you. Guess I am that high."

Two heartbeats loudly beating in unison, unknown which one's was beating faster. Even though, it was the beautiful words anyone had ever said to her, Historia had to clarify.

"Does that mean you forgive me?"

"Of course, how can I refuse anything to my dear Historia."

Excited, Histroia wrapped her arms around Ymir's neck and collapsed their lips together. Ymir let a surprised squeak, gasp stuck in her throat. But, she quickly regained her composure and put her hand on Historia's cheek to pull her closer. The other hand was desperately glued on her waist.

They cling to each other like there was no tomorrow. The kiss started off sweet, but Historia tilted her head and deepened it. Just like in the bathroom. But, this time it is not followed by guilt nor regret. Only by pure desire and tenderness. This time no one is going to interrupt their moment, even if they did, they have all the time in the world to do it again. That thought tickled Historia's brain. Just to think that she found a person that truly understands and loves her in this age is truly amazing. She could not ask more. Historia hopes that in every other world she gets to be together with her Ymir like that. Even with pain and torment, she doesn't care if her every day will end like this, Historia curled up in Ymir's arms.

When the kiss became so intense that their lungs started to plead for breath, they separated. Eyes closed, their forhead pressed together. 

Next day when they walked into class with interlinked hands everybody cheered.

"Ymir, I knew you could do it. I always believed in you!" Sasha loudly yelled as she was taking 5 dollars from Connie.

"Ugh, c'mon I thought Reiner wouldn't let this." Connie's heartbreaking expression was really funny to look at.

"Hey, dumbasses, you bet on me?!" Ymir yelled at their silliness, even though she wasn't really angry, she can't this slide.

"Duh, a year ago, for your information."

"So, you guys a thing now?" Jean asks rasing his eyebrow.

Ymir blushes and confirms it leading to more cheering. Like she wasn't just yelling at Connie just a minute ago. Then, Historia notices Reiner leaning on the wall near to someone. 

"Reiner?" Historia calls. 

Moving in closer she notices that he is holding hand with someone too. And that person is Berthold. Everyone's gaze follows them, like class just discovered that they're here. Reiner's face heats.

"You have something to tell us?" Historia asks, smiling.

Reiner cutely puts a hand on his neck, trying to avoid the whole class's gaze. "Ah, yes. Me and Berthold have some news too! We're-"

"Gay!" Ymir falls into hysterics, grabbing her stomach. She's cackling nonstop like a crow. There was not a single person who laughed with her. "Can't believe that our jackass and his clerk are together now! It explains everything. Like, I always knew that you two had something, but I didn't know that it was homosexuality!" 

"Hey, what's so funny? Like you're not gay yourself!" Reiner immediately falls for bait. Just like always. The comfort of argument draws a smile on Historia's face.

"Besides I'm not gay. Berthold is."

Class falls into silence.

"You're not only gay, but also in denial?" Ymir slaps her lap, uncontrollably laughing again.

"N-no! I meant I'm bi, you dumbass!"

"Who you calling dumbass, dimbass!"

Their bickering turn into a background sound, Historia peacefully leans on Ymir's shoulders and Ymir softens, planting a kiss on her forhead. She wouldn't complain if everyday was like this. Well not exactly like this, but you get the point. 

Historia glad that she kissed Ymir at that party, because she really liked it.