Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Somewhere in the 1950s…

Inho sat down in the closest window seat he could find on the train as soon as he boarded, watching it load in high velocity as everyone struggled to find a seat. People were bustling about, gazing at every filled seat with suspicion and annoyance as though it had been their rightful seat that was stolen by someone who was faster.
Luckily for him, he didn’t have a lot of luggage on him that would slow him down like most did. He barely had anything left at this point. He had left in such a hurry, worried and annoyed all at once. But he had to do it, he had to run here as soon as possible and hope with bated breath that all would be well.

It had to be.

Looking through the window, Inho found it surprisingly easy to zone out, ignoring the loud noise of fellow passengers and simply stare at the train station they were about to leave behind. If he were sentimental he might’ve even let emotions show on his face. But no, he wasn’t that kind of person. He was the kind that shoved everything down and carried on quietly. So instead he settled in his seat restlessly, taking a deep breath as the train started to drive away slowly, leaving the city of the past behind.
Time moved slowly on the train and the lack of companionship or frankly the lack of anything left Inho alone with his mind and thoughts despite his best efforts not to overthink.

But he couldn’t help but think of the heavy knot in his stomach that worryingly enough wasn’t loosening despite being closer than ever to his destination.

His destination.

The Grand Hotel

If anyone would’ve asked him about the Grand Hotel years ago, he wouldn’t have known anything about it all except for the fact that it was a prestigious, luxurious hotel somewhere in the tropical southern part of the country. Even people in the north knew that the magnificent hotel offered the best possible way of life. A life that was strictly reserved for the richest of nobility. It was a distant untouchable fantasy place for people like him and honestly he never cared about it at all. Until his sister started working there 6 years ago.

His knowledge of the hotel now however, was intricate and detailed with the stories of his sister’s letters. She would tell him everything, from the daily dose of annoying entitled guests, to the regular guests and their updates.

Updates.

Inho had to smile slightly at the word his sister preferred to use rather than simply calling it gossip as it definitely was. She didn’t even spare the mention of staff from her letters, always writing about their newest updates as well. He knew some names by now. Names of people she mostly liked. Well, tolerated would be a better word considering she never let anyone get too close. A female omega working alone sounded like someone easy to get close too, but not her. No his sister was stronger than many alphas he’d seen. Sometimes he truly wondered why she wasn’t one like him. Her fierceness and fearlessness were more than enough to prove it. She’d tell him it’s his fault for taking the gene first and he’d always huff a short quiet chuckle in return.

He’d missed her a lot.

It had been too long since he’d last seen her. She usually came to town once or twice a year. But he… he never visited her at the hotel. He never really thought of the reasons before. Maybe it was that he too had to work and couldn’t afford it. Especially because as staff she lived in the hotel’s dormitory and couldn’t simply host him.

Yeah. That was the explanation he gave himself, an explanation she understood silently even if they both know he could’ve tried harder.

But still, she never complained. She would only just write him about how much she missed him and how she can’t wait to be able to visit again. Her letters became the only way they both could survive the distance. The letters filled with anecdotes and updates written with the occasional laughter or stress kept him afloat more than she could ever know.

So when she stopped her letters for 6 whole months, Inho knew something was completely wrong. He cursed himself for not realizing how long he hadn’t gotten one and started worrying about everything that could be wrong.

As though his hands were caught up with his instincts before his mind was, he felt his hand squeeze around the half folded letter in his pocket. Her last letter. It had been cryptic to say the least, laced with the usual longing and warmth but also having a certain air of caution within it. When Inho first read her letter, he assumed she was simply overworked and stressed about her new promotion in the hotel. But the more he read it—and he did more times than he could count—the more off putting it felt. Against his better judgment, he took out her neatly written letter and opened it, reading it once more for any signs of what could be wrong.

Dear Inho,
I have missed you and while I know that I always write you this, you must know that I always mean it. The new position of floor manager turned out to be more difficult than I originally thought. You’d think the work would get easier since I didn’t have to clean the rooms myself but no of course not. Manager Jang Geumja is only more strict and harsh on me now, blaming me for anything out of place on my floor and by out of place I mean a vase being a centimeter away from its usual spot on the table. It’s fine though, soon enough I will be done with the never ending expectations of this place. I have finally found a way to change things but I’ll have to be careful about it and when I’m done here, I will come to you and we can finally spend more than one day together without worrying about work.
See you soon,
Saebyeok

Inho frowned at the second part of the letter. When he first read it he assumed she might’ve found a way to finally be more relaxed at her work or perhaps even that she found new work in the city, closer to him. But no matter how hard he tried to convince himself of these reasonings something continued to gnaw at him. His instincts were restless and on edge but he’d tried to rationally shut it down anyway. After all, Saebyeok has lived and worked there for a long time and while this place was never her home he knew she felt comfortable in it. So there must be an explanation for why she hasn’t written him in months. He hoped she wasn’t ill but at the same time something inside him, a voice told him that maybe a strong cold wouldn’t be such a bad explanation.

Because what made Inho so worried is that in all her six years of work at the Grand Hotel, his sister never stopped writing to him.

The sound of a mother yelling at her son for taking a piece of candy from the trolly brought Inho back to the present. He quickly stuffed the letter back in his pocket and in the back of his mind too. There was no point in overthinking when he would be there soon enough. Soon, it will all make sense.
For now he stared at the window and watched as the scenery changed from the cold grey buildings of the city to warm looking forests. He had never been in the south and the longer he watched the window, the more it felt surreal. The south had a certain charm to it. Aside from the locals being known for their unique kindness and hospitality, the nature was so different. Instead of big complexes and busy crowds, the south had small cottage houses. The air wasn’t just centered on pollution and work. It was centered on happiness and on the river in the heart of it all. A river he could only see from afar, but one he knew was the heart and soul of the south. It apparently shined red in the sunlight. Suffice to say, it felt like he had left a black and white movie and transitioned into a colorful sun soaked one. Usually any plants he’d see had a dark cold green color. But not here. Here, every plant he’d see was painted the warmest shade of green, intermingled with the sunlight. Every flower field had an array of beautiful vibrant colors. The warm atmosphere almost settled his nerves.

Almost.

When the time came to leave the train, he found his steps slower than usual. Usually he’d walk any place with an air of confidence not particularly interested in his surroundings. But something about coming here under these circumstances made him want to pause and check every corner for signs, for omens, good or bad. As he walked he couldn’t help but notice how different people operated in this space. If he were in the city, people would already be pushing one another, fighting to get out first. However, walking here through the station, Inho noticed how people were slow but sure in their movements. Relaxed in a way that one could only be in a warm place like the south. He watched as people hugged their returning family members happily and it only made his heart clench in sadness. He was always on his own despite having Saebyeok and he knew she could say the same thing about him. The fact that she wasn’t here right now expecting him at the station, hell the fact that she was unaware of his arrival in the first place made him feel lonelier than ever and that loneliness manifested itself in his slow disorganized steps.

But unbeknownst to him, someone a few paces ahead walked the same exact way but for different reasons.

Gihun walked towards the exit with a tired smile on his face. He was finally home again. But it felt tainted this time, his smile more dimmed than ever with the sadness that still hadn’t faded a year after he lost his dad. It still broke his heart that he hadn’t been here when his dad died. It still haunted him how he didn’t get a warning, a sign of any decline in his health. Just a telegraph telling him that his dad had died peacefully on a quiet evening.

He didn’t even catch the funeral and he still thinks about it everyday.

He’d blamed himself countless times for studying abroad but then he’d always remind himself that that’s what his dad wished for him. A life that omegas like him didn’t usually have.
Unlike what many like to think, it was never lost to him that he was privileged. Coming from one of the richest family in the state. The family people went to when they wanted the best of what the south could offer, the family that owned the famous and glamorous Grand Hotel.

Gihun noticed his steps were instinctively slower than usual, well more unhurried really. He knew Sangwoo was waiting outside of the station, probably with a bouquet of his favorite flowers. Sangwoo was thoughtful that way, always noticing the little things that Gihun liked and doing them until Gihun would stop liking them. But that was the norm for Sangwoo and had been since they were kids. The alpha spent their entire childhood paying attention to him ever since his parents—who were distant relatives of his father— had died and his father decided to let him stay at the Grand Hotel, raising them all as friends rather than siblings.
The thought of a sibling dynamic between him and Sangwoo made him want to snort. The alpha never once in their childhood treated him as a brother. He treated him as anything but that and never hid it either. Literally everyone at the Grand Hotel knew that Sangwoo was completely smitten with him and always had been. The thought warmed his heart but also caused a small glimmer of stress to break through his mind. He knew that Sangwoo had waited eagerly for him to finish his studies and come back so that they could officially get engaged, but he couldn’t help but hope that Sangwoo wouldn’t jump on the idea of taking their relationship to the next step too soon.

For some reason unknown to him, coming back to the city, to the Grand Hotel felt like a burden more than it felt like freedom. Before he could dwell on it any further, he spotted Sangwoo standing next to his shiny red car and of course he was holding a bouquet of colorful tulips. Flowers he’d gotten used to getting for so long that it became a habit, giving him a feeling of familiar comfort.

“Gihun!” Sangwoo gave him a bright smile and Gihun instantly smiled back happily.

Maybe he was just overthinking and maybe coming back here was anything but a burden after all.

“Sangwoo, it’s so good to see you!” The moment the words came out of his mouth and the moment he was in arms reach, Sangwoo grabbed him with both hands—even the hand holding the bouquet— and hugged him tightly. Gihun was used to the alpha’s display of affection but still he always managed to be surprised every time Sangwoo did that.

He felt Sangwoo’s grip on his back and waist tighten for few seconds as he heard a whispered “I missed you so much.”
Gihun stroked his back gently and swallowed his suddenly dry throat to whisper a “I missed you too.”

Sangwoo reluctantly ended the hug and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. It almost felt like he hadn’t wanted to let go, as if he were forced to and to be completely honest he was, because unmated alphas and omegas didn’t really engage in public kisses. They were actually lucky they were in front of a busy train station because Sangwoo wouldn’t dare do anything but hold his hand and stroke it gently in the Grand Hotel.

There were rules after all.

“How is everyone?! I have missed Junhee, mom, and miss Jang so much,” he asked excitedly.
Sangwoo flashes his him another wide smile as he gives Gihun the bouquet. Gihun pretended to be surprised at the gesture and thanked Sangwoo timidly while holding the fresh flowers to his face.

“They missed you of course. But no one missed you more than I did that’s for sure.” Gihun smiled at him again and before he could think of reply Sangwoo continued while holding the car door open for him. “Now that you’re finally back we can begin to plan our future together. But your mother will tell you all about it later.” He closed Gihun’s door in the same exact moment the thought reached his mind.

Ah there we go…

Gihun watched Sangwoo turn on the car, swallowed again and replied tiredly, “Can’t wait.”

As a car drove away, Inho found himself following the direction of a local man called Kim.

The direction to the Grand Hotel. He sighed as he started marching on in the tropical heat.

It will be quite a walk.

The car parked in front of the spacious elegant entrance of the hotel.

His home.

It stood as tall as ever, its beautiful soft beige color clashing with the elements of gold all over the building. The sunlight always made the gold pieces look blinding to him but they were the baroque elements his mother had liked so much after all. The ultimate sign of wealth and luxury, she said.
As they approached the entrance, Gihun smiled at the valet as Sangwoo mindlessly tossed him the keys without a second glance. He recognized some faces, distant memories but all warm nonetheless.
The moment he entered the lobby, he felt the air shift. Now no longer humid and fresh, but cool and confined. Meticulously made to smell like expensive roses, wines and money.

Looking around, walking to the main hall and smiling at the familiar faces wishing him a warm welcome back, he heard it.

“Gihun! Welcome home!” The familiar sound made him smile wide immediately, turning his head slightly to the right where his dear ms. Jang Geumja stood before the giant beige marble stairs. “Ms. Jang, I have missed you so much,” he walked closer and noticed how she was nervously clasping her hands together in an effort not to try and hug him, but he knew that tick by now and he never cared. He opened his arms wide the moment he was close enough and pulled her into a tight hug, smiling brighter as he heard her muffled surprised “oh.”

“I missed you so, so much ms. Jang,” he whispered in a bittersweet voice.

He felt her arms tighten slightly as she whispered back, “I have missed you more my darling.”

The nickname made him relax in her grip, bringing back old memories. Ms. Jang had always worked at the hotel since the day he was born. Hell, since the day the hotel itself was born. The omega had always been there and as far as he was concerned and to the absolute horror of his mother, Gihun considered ms. Jang his second mom. It still surprised staff when they saw them interact because to him she was the sweetest person on earth but to everyone else, ms. Jang Geumja was a force to reckoned with. As the manager of all female staff, she was an absolute menace to everyone. Even the male staff wouldn’t escape her bossy orders. She was strict and harsh but she was never cruel. She simply makes the Grand Hotel function perfectly with nothing out of place and to be completely honest he had always loved how soft and warm she was to him ever since he was a kid. He was always running around after her and would get into all kinds of trouble with his mother for it.

But he never cared, she was family.

When they pulled back from their hug, he noticed that Sangwoo hadn’t followed him. He turned slightly to see him talking to a server, frowning slightly as he talked. Gihun noted how frowning always looked weird on Sangwoo, he was only used to his smiles and kind looks.
“Your mother is waiting for you upstairs in your new suite. Junhee will be there too,” ms. Jang pulled him by the hand as they ascended the stairs. “I can’t wait to tell you about life abroad,” he glanced at her and saw small smile form on her face.

“I can’t wait to hear it.”

Inho finally arrived after walking 30 long minutes in the summer heat. When he finally got there, he was stunned at the sheer massiveness of the hotel even from the distance. It looked endlessly wide from the front side alone and it made him wonder how many rooms were actually in this place. There were gold decorations all over the building and they complimented the the golden banner that said “Grand Hotel.”
There were flower pots and luxury cars everywhere he looked. People looked borderline absurd with the amount of wealth you could just feel on them. Each man dressed up in the latest styles of suits and each lady wore tons of shining jewelry and furs.

Furs in the summer because they’re rich.

Inho walked towards the big entrance but before he could enter, an employee—big looking fellow— suddenly stood in front of him. “Excuse me sir, how can I help you?” Inho blinked in surprise. He didn’t see other people getting stopped like that. The guy probably could tell by Inho’s simple suit that he wasn’t one of them.

“I’m looking for a staff mem-” before he could finish the sentence, the man had flipped an internal switch and looked at him with a slight frown as if his suspicions were confirmed.
“Staff and their visitors use the back entrance only,” he said in a bored tone and with that Inho knew he was being dismissed. He turned around without arguing with the guy and walked all the way to the back.

The back entrance was nothing like the main one. This was just big double door with a small set of wide stairs in front of it. There were employees and merchants moving all around in precise routines. But to be honest, Inho felt more at ease at this entrance. It looked human, something he could afford. Just regular people, trees and benches neatly placed everywhere. The trees making the place more beautiful as well also hiding it from sight from all the other guests.

Not that they would ever be remotely close to this side of the hotel.

Inho approached a lanky looking woman who happened to be the only one standing in silence.
“Excuse me, I’m looking for a girl who works here. Her name is Hwang Saebyeok. Do you happen to know where I could find her?”

Inho knew by the pale look on her face that something is horribly horribly wrong.
She looked at him with wide eyes and began moving towards the entrance, “wait just a second,” she mumbled and hurried into the building.

Inho stood frowning, wondering whether she’d come back and right before he could go in himself, a young man dressed in a black suit—the male staff attire were black suits, absolute nonsense—came to stand before him. He had black hair and although he had young features on his face, he looked cautious and reserved.

“Who are you?” He asked Inho frankly and Inho decided that the boy was right. Direct questions were the best approach. “I’m Hwang Inho. I’m looking for my sister Hwang Saebyeok, she’s a floor manager here,” he said without missing a beat and watched as the man’s face blanched slightly when he was sure that Inho wasn’t lying.

“She- she’s not here,” he started turning around and Inho immediately gripped him by the elbow.

“What do you mean? She works here, she has worked here the last 6 years.”

The young man, an alpha by the smell of it, turned his head and looked worryingly at him. “You need to leave. Alright?”

“Are you even listening? My sister is here and I need to see her.” Inho decided that his patience was running thin with the cryptic shit people keep throwing at him, dropping the man’s elbow and started walking to the door himself. Before he could take more than two steps, he found his own arm being gripped.

“What are you doing? You can’t enter through this door. Only staff members are allowed,” he hissed quietly.

Inho’s frown deepened. What the absolute fuck does he have to do to get in here?

“The guy at the front entrance said, staff visitors go through the back and now you’re telling me I can’t go through here. How the hell do I get in then?” He spoke loudly, his patience officially running out.

Inho didn’t get a chance to continue to walk before the grip on his arm tightened.
“Your sister doesn’t work here anymore alright? She- she was fired six months ago,” the guy whispered and Inho froze.

“What do you mean? Fired?” He was so confused…
“As I said she was fired six months ago and we haven’t seen her since. How are you her brother if you don’t know any of this?” The young man looked at him incredulously but Inho couldn’t even react to the jab. His entire world had just turned upside down at the admission.

“Sh- she used to send me letters regularly but she stopped a while ago so I came to check on her,” he found himself trailing off, mind still racing with the fact that his sister was now somewhere he didn’t know.
“And you only came to check six months later,” the guy threw him an unimpressed look, throwing the snub in the most deadpan tone he’d heard in a while. Inho couldn’t help but look down in embarrassment. He knew he had no excuse. Well… one he wasn’t willing to share.
“I- there were some circumstances Mr.-” he paused, looking at the young man expectantly.
“Junho. My name is Hwang Junho,” he stretched out hand and Inho hesitated for just one second. Hwang was a common last name but it still caught him off guard whenever someone else was also called Hwang.
“Nice to meet you Junho,” he shook his hand but before he could say anything else, Junho suddenly spoke up again in a dismissive manner that Inho knew would annoy the crap out of him.
“Alright, well good to finally meet you. Now leave,” he started pushed Inho away from the entrance gently and once again Inho found himself questioning how the hell he could get in there.
“I’m not leaving this place. I need to find out what happened to her and why she was fired.” He watched Junho look around nervously. “Look, no one knows anything about her in there. You can look for her anywhere but here,” he said. A subtle type of plea in his words.

A plea that made Inho want to stay even more.

Inho looked at Junho, knowing he hit a dead end with this guy and found himself randomly asking “Do you know where I can find Kim’s pub?”
Kim was the local who helped him out with instructions. Apparently he was quite the deal in midtown. He had told Inho that he should come by for free booze if he wished and when Inho asked for his outdoor pub’s location the man merely smiled and said to just ask anyone. So he did and turns out the man wasn’t lying because Junho immediately brightened up a bit.
“Of course but you wouldn’t be able to get there on your own. I just finished my shift. I’ll change and take you. I was heading there anyway. Wait for me,” Inho blinked at the sudden change in tone as he watched the younger man leave quickly. It surprised him that Junho was absolutely alright with him as long as he didn’t want to go inside.

Minutes ticked by as he waited and he frankly contemplated just going in anyway, but something made him stop. His instincts told him that he’d be better off going with Junho and getting to know him better. Because Inho’s instincts were always right and right now they were telling him that Junho knows more than he’s letting on.

Inho stared at one of the many windows of the big building again, vowing to get in no matter how.

Gihun looked outside the window of his suite, watching the clear blue skies and the breeze filling the room. The quiet was nice but of course it was short lived the moment his mother and sister entered the suite.
“Gihun, son welcome back!” His mother gave him a brief hug before pulling back, assessing his looks from head to toe.
“Look at you, all grown up,” she smiled cheerfully and even though the comment caused a slight tug at his heart for some reason, he smiled just as cheerfully. “I missed you so much mom,” he said before turning to look at Junhee whose pregnancy was showing a bit. He gasped at the sight.
“Ah! Look at you all glowy,” he hugged her, mindful of not holding her too tight and smiled as he heard her soft chuckle. “Shut up! You’re the one getting the compliments today,”Gihun almost laughed when he could hear his mom’s faintly scandalized gasp. According to his mom, Gihun was the older omega and Junhee should be mindful of that when she talked to him but they never cared.

Life wasn’t as serious as his mother wanted it to be.

“Where’s your husband?” He smiled wider as he saw Junhee caressing her belly at the mention of her husband. “He was at his home town visiting his dad, but he should be arriving tomorrow morning. He wouldn’t miss tomorrows party after all,” Junhee smirked slightly while glancing at their mother.

Oh no…

“Party?” He found himself repeating stupidly, staring at both of them with a confused smile.
“Well of course. We are having a party in honor of your return. We will announce your engagement and the assigning of the new general manager of the hotel,” his mother’s words and nonchalant tone made him pause and look like a deer in a headlight.

Engagement? Tomorrow?

He only noticed that he said that out loud when Junhee whispered, “that’s my cue,” and left with a smile like the traitor she was.

“Well yes. You two have been waiting long enough. The plan was always for you two to get engaged once you finished your studies.”
Gihun’s wide eyes didn’t relax at all. “Yes but tomorrow?”
His mother shot him an exasperated look. “Don’t tell me you still want to get to know him better. You know him more than anyone. You two have been in love since you were young,” she smirked as she sat down on the velvet olive green sofa. Gihun sat next to her and glanced at the ground in embarrassment at her words. It still felt weird and slightly uncomfortable when others talked about his relationship with Sangwoo. Especially when it was his own mother.
“Of course, I- I don’t mind getting engaged but why so soon?” He smiled hesitantly, watching his mother drink a sip of wine.

“It’s suitable that way. Anyway, Sangwoo prepared everything just the way you’d like it. All you have to do is to enjoy yourself tomorrow,” she smiled and had another sip while Gihun forced himself to smile and nod.

Later in the evening…

“Are you seriously crying?” Inho was utterly disturbed at the sight in front of him. Junho was drunk.

And crying.

What even is his life.

“You don’t get it. You don’t know how much I love her,” he hiccuped slightly.
“Oh I get it. You have been talking about how much you love her since you got drunk,” Inho said drily, raising his eyebrows in slight mockery.

“I’m not drunk,” he shot back, annoyed with what tried to be a glare but completely failed.
“You’re not- then what’s with you then?”

Inho was seriously rethinking his life choices.

“I love her,” and he started crying again. Inho sighed in exasperation and looked around, seriously contemplating leaving this guy here.

“Look Junho, you seem like a good man and I’m sure Kang Noeul will realize it soon enough, but please, you’ve got to help me find Saebyeok and tell me why she got fired,” he raised his eyebrows expectantly.
Junho stared at him hesitantly for a few long seconds before speaking. “She- she made a big mistake.”
Inho hunched his back slightly over the table to get closer, as if building a false sense of privacy so Junho could let down his guard.
“What kind of mistake?”
Junho looked at him sadly. “She stole.”
Inho straightened his hunched back in surprise.

What?

“She- she was caught for stealing a diamond necklace from one of our most important guests. They fired her for it.”

“What the hell are you saying. My sister would never steal,” Inho’s voice growing louder at what must be the most bizarre accusation he’s ever heard.
“The lady of the hotel, madame Oh Malsoon found the necklace in Saebyeok’s cupboard. We saw her get out of her room holding the missing necklace in hand.” Inho’s frown deepened. If that was even possible at this point.

“There’s no way that’s true. She would never,” Inho would never believe that his sister was a thief.
Never.

“That’s what we said too. We’ve all known her for years but you never know when someone gets blinded by wealth.” Junho pressed his lips in a thin line, probably trying to purse his lips in sympathy or even pout. He couldn’t tell.

“I need to see this owner of the hotel. I need to talk to her,” Inho glared at Junho’s snort.
“Meet her? Do you think the owners are just regular humans like us? You can’t simply meet her. You can’t even look her in the eyes. We’re just their servants Inho.” Junho sounded defeated and Inho hated it. He wouldn’t just give up.

“I don’t care,” he interrupted firmly.

He has to get to the bottom of this.

“Well good luck, I need to get back to the hotel,” Junho abruptly stood up and almost tripped immediately and Inho made a decision right there.

He wouldn’t leave this guy.

He’ll use him to get into the hotel.

Policies be damned.

Gihun was staring out at the night sky of his terrace, gripping railing so tightly that his knuckles were white. He was trying to find a single star to guide him but the sky was surprisingly empty. He turned his head when he heard a faint knock from inside. He tightened the robe around himself and went to open the door.

Sangwoo stood there with a tired smile on his face.
“I couldn’t go to sleep before wishing you a good night,” he whispered softly and Gihun smiled back at the sweet gesture.
He continued nervously, “your mother told you about tomorrow?”

Gihun’s hand that was still clutching the door knob grew stiffer at his sudden tight grip. “She did,” he smiled back.
“Gihun, I’m so excited. Everything we’ve been ever waiting for is finally happening. Our dreams are coming true love,” he squeezed Gihun’s forearm with one hand and Gihun felt a sudden weight on his shoulder.

“Yes they really are,” he continued to smile softly.
“Well goodnight love,” Sangwoo flashed him one last smile when he wished him a goodnight as well and left, leaving Gihun in the doorway with a slightly fading smile on his face.

Sangwoo then entered his own suite to hear slight sounds of rustling. In his bed, Kang Noeul lied comfortably, smirking at him.
“I thought I told you not to come here unannounced,” his cold voice echoed the room.

Noeul’s smirk widened.”I missed you.”
He stared at her coldly for a moment.

“It’s the last time you allow yourself to come here. If you come here again, it will be to simply clean the place. Understood.” It wasn’t a question and while Noeul’s smile dropped, it grew again when Sangwoo took off his suit.

The next day…

Inho woke up at the sound of a panicked Junho shaking him awake. “What the hell are you still doing here? We had a deal. You should’ve left at dawn!”
Inho simply groaned in response and much to Junho’s annoyance didn’t seem bothered at all.
Almost like he planned it that way. They had snuck into Junho’s room who happened to not have a roommate for the time being.

It was perfect.

“Leave now! You need to quietly sneak out or she’ll kill me,” he hissed while throwing a pillow at the groggy Inho.
“You need to relax or we’ll be caught because of your panic you know,” he yawned as he looked around the modest room. Two single beds, two cupboards, a sink with a small oval mirror above it. At the center of the room, in front of the door, there was a round table with two chairs.

As Inho took it all in, a firm knock broke the silence.

“Junho? Are you still sleeping?” An annoyed female voice came through and whoever that is, must be the she that Junho had mentioned because he looked absolutely terrified. He beckoned Inho to hide on the floor and hurried to open the door to find ms. Jang looking at him sternly.

“Good morning ms. Jang.”
“This is the last time you oversleep for work,” her voice was ice cold.
“Sorry mom,” he apologized sheepishly.

Mom? Ms Jang who Inho knew as to be a menace through Saebyeok’s letters is Junho’s mom?

“You need to go greet the new waiter and give him a rundown of the routine.”

New waiter? If Inho were a dog, his ears would’ve definitely perked up at the words.

Suddenly, he knew exactly what he’s gonna do.

Fifteen minutes later…

Junho walked out of the building to greet the newest employee. Suddenly, the supposed new employee turned around with his cv in hand and it was none other than Inho with a barely there smile on his face.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Oh Youngil.”
Junho’s eyes widened comically. “What the hell are you still doing here?!”

Inho’s shadow of a smile dissipated as he looked at him in complete seriousness and said, “I’m not buying that my sister would ever steal. I’m not leaving this place until I find out what really happened so stay out of my way.”
They stared at each other for long tension filled seconds until Junho pointed a finger at him, looking five seconds away from attacking him. “You can do whatever the hell you want but under no circumstance will I ever help you. Got it?!”

“Yes ma’am, I’m Oh Youngil,” Inho stood in ms. Jang’s office, smiling at her politely while Junho stood silently sulking next to him.

“Well you’ll start tomorrow morning and you will share a room with Junho. Now you’ll go to the tailor so that he can adjust your uniform and sew your name on it. You may leave,” she barely spared them another glance, turning her focus back towards her desk.

While they walked towards the tailor Inho glanced at Junho, “why do you sew the names on the uniforms?”

Junho sighed deeply.

“So that they know which suit belongs to whom when they bring it back from cleaning, god this is a disaster. You know nothing about this job and you’ll get us all in trouble for it. I just know it,” Inho watched Junho’s face twitch from the stress and had to hold himself back from making fun of him.

“Look, I promise I’ll leave as soon as I find out what happened alright?” He tried to comfort the guy so he doesn’t collapse from stress.
Junho stopped in front of a door and turned to him, frowning. “Why are you so convinced that there is a conspiracy?”
“Because I know my sister,” he answered back confidently. Defensiveness creeping into his scent.
Junho’s frown eased slowly, taking a deep breath before opening the door of the tailor’s office.

After finishing trying on his new fit, Inho stared at the mirror. He always looked good in black and even the white dress shirt fit snugly, not bothering him. The whole uniform was clean, well designed and had no single wrinkle in sight. From behind the door he heard ms. Jang barking orders at all the staff.

“Tonight is the party. No one is allowed to rest. No one will be seen chatting during work. No one will eat more than what the chef gives you.”
Inho huffed in amusement at the stream of commands.

Saebyeok wasn’t kidding, Jang was a nightmare.

Then when he was beginning to shut out the barked orders, he heard Jang call out someone’s name.

“Kang Noeul. Where have you been?”
Inho couldn’t help but look out the small tinted window of the room.

Yeah of course they had indoor windows inside rooms that literally just showed you the main hall for the staff.

He couldn’t help his curiosity after Junho’s breakdown last night. She looked good enough, slightly tired. She wasn’t wearing the usual dark grey/blue dress uniform.
He watched them argue about the fact that she had the day off. Ms. Jang looked annoyed, telling her that there were no free days whenever they had parties and Noeul argued back that she was a floor manger and had more rights.
The debate ended the moment ms Jang ordered her to change into her work attire.

Floor manager.

What Saebyeok had been.

He found himself absentmindedly looking around the room in frustration. His gaze settling on an elegant looking white tux. Probably belonged to one of the guests. He stared at it as a new idea began to form in his mind. A crazy idea that would bring him closer to the truth.
To his sister.
But before he could begin planning his new idea, he needed to go to Saebyeok’s old room. There might be something he could find.

He sneaked out before Junho came back and went to the dormitories, walking until he found a room that had a missing plaque at the door. Every other door had had 2 plaques with the names of their owners written on them but this one only had one name.
Kang Noeul.
Inho entered the empty room and started looking around. He paused at the sight of the bed where his sister probably wrote her letters.

He sighed and searched the room to no avail. The moment he tried to leave he heard footsteps approaching and he started quickly looking for a place to hide. He settled on hiding under the bed when the door opened and none other than ms. Jang and Noeul entered.
Inho heard the door close and the sound of a chair being pulled back.

“So, where were you today?”
“I told you I was running errands.”
“Funny. I heard differently. You see the midwife came by a while ago and told me an interesting thing. Say Noeul did you marry behind our backs?”

Silence

“No.”
“Well then how can an unmated omega be pregnant?”

Another beat of silence

“I- my alpha is having some problems but when he solves them he’ll marry me.”

A scoff

“And how do you propose I tell this to madame Seong?”
“Please don’t ms. Jang, I beg you! I’ll be fired immediately.”

This time the silence remained until it was only broken by the sound of Jang standing up and leaving.
Noeul took a deep breath and sniffled slightly before leaving herself.

When Inho braced his hand against the wooden floor to move he felt slight crack underneath his hand. The wooden piece can be moved.

Inho stared at it in silence.

What the actual fuck is this place…

Gihun sat with Sangwoo at a table in the hotel’s open terrace. It was beautiful as ever, the weather clear and warm and the view showing off the beautiful landscape of nature and the river in the distance.
“Mom should tell Junhee about her husband not getting the general manger title. Letting Junhee find out like everyone else will rightfully bother her you know,” he stared at Sangwoo worryingly.

Junhee was under the impression that her husband Lee Myunggi— the first born son of one of the richest noble men— would get the title of the general manger of the Grand Hotel.

“You shouldn’t be thinking about this. In any way Myunggi could never lead this hotel. He is just a rich mans son.”

Gihun frowned slightly, “Still, it shouldn’t be this way. I would tell her but mom forbids me from doing it.”

Junho walked towards their table with a glass of lemonade. “Lunch will be served in 5 minutes,” he said as he placed the glass down gently. “Junho! I have missed you!” Gihun beamed at him and Junho smiled back timidly, “we have missed you too sir.”

“Bring me another glass of wine,” Sangwoo interrupted the moment without sparing Junho a glance.
“I haven’t seen him in so long! He looks all grown up now,” Gihun smiled, staring at Junho as he walked away.
“And I haven’t seen a smile as beautiful as yours in all my life,” Gihun turned his surprised gaze back to Sangwoo who was watching him with a soft expression on his face.
Gihun huffed quietly, smiling at the view ahead of them.

“Gihun, I love you. I always have.” Gihun couldn’t help the wide smile blossoming on his face. He gazed at his lap in embarrassment. “Oh, I haven’t heard that in a while,” he smiled shyly.
“Well better get used to it,” Sangwoo chuckled and Gihun smiled wider for a moment before it gradually faded away as he stared at the sky again.

The moment Inho was certain he wouldn’t be caught, he took out the hidden letters and diary in the secret compartment and hurried out of the room. He went back to Junho’s room and started reading a letter where his sister wrote that she was getting more worried by the minute.

After reading the cryptic unsent letter, he made his mind up about his risky plan. He stashed the letters and diary away and headed to the tailor’s office.

The evening was simply put, glamorous. Everyone was dressed to the nines, greeting one another with superficial smiles and even more so superficial hugs. Gihun looked at the main hall,— where people usually sat to eat or lounge in— now transformed into a mixture of dining tables and a ballroom. He descended the stairs staring at the wonder that is the Grand Hotel. Rose and white Flowers hanging everywhere from the tables to even the side and railing of the stairs.
The chandelier above him was shining, every crystal glittering like diamonds. The tables were furnished with beautiful rosee silky covers and made perfect by the golden candles and flower centerpieces.

Live music played softly on the piano, elevating the already glamorous atmosphere. His mother wasn’t kidding. Sangwoo had made sure the place looked completely perfect.

It made his heart tug in gratitude. Sangwoo always made sure he was happy.

Gihun felt all eyes on him and he started feeling the nerves. This was it, confirmed by all the knowing smiles and congratulations sent his way. He took a deep breath and gave his hand to Sangwoo who stood at the bottom of stairs, smiling eagerly.

“You look absolutely stunning,” he whispered in his ear and Gihun felt a shiver down his spine. “Thank you. You look handsome too,” he whispered back with a smile. Sangwoo looked as great as ever. A black suit with a subtle beige accents that matched his own beige and white suit.

They sat down at the table reserved for the family. Well, just him, Sangwoo, his mother, Junhee and Myunggi. Myunggi greeted him warmly, congratulating him on finishing his studies which to be honest meant a lot to Gihun. Everyone was just congratulating him for the engagement and it annoyed him to some extent.

He was more than that. He did more than that.

Just as they began joking about how some guests looked like they were at the royal ball, his mother stood up and walked towards the stairs, ascending to the middle of it as though it’s her stage where she could have everyone’s attention and she certainly did.
The moment she cleared her throat gently, the music stopped on cue and everyone quieted down looking up towards her.

“Welcome everyone! We are honored to have you all with us to celebrate this great moment. After waiting for a long time, Gihun and Sangwoo are finally officially engaged. May their engagement mark a beautiful beginning for the Grand Hotel,” everyone cheered happily glancing at Gihun who smiled and lowered his head slightly, not daring to meet anyone’s glance and especially not Sangwoo’s who was absolutely beaming at him.

“Speaking of beautiful beginnings. It’s time to announce the new general manager of the Grand Hotel. I’m proud to present you the new manager and the future son in law of the Seong family, Cho Sangwoo!”
The guests clapped all around the ball room as Sangwoo stood up from his seat and bowed elegantly. Gihun, who had been smiling at Sangwoo, glanced towards Junhee who was frowning at their mother. Myunggi was staring at her nervously as if he could scent her confusion and slightly betrayed scent. Gihun could see his hand holding hers under the table, silently begging her to calm down for her and their baby’s sake. Gihun pursed his lips in guilt. He felt bad for not letting her know but his mother had explicitly warned him and he didn’t want to start his return with a conflict with her.

Before he could think of what to say Sangwoo who was still standing touched his shoulder, surprising him slightly.
“May I have this dance?”

Inho adjusted his cuffs, walking around the giant main hall. Or was it a ball room now?
He had never seen this amount of wealth before. Gold decorations, silk curtains leading to the veranda, flowers everywhere, food and drinks everywhere and at the heart of it all what must be the biggest crystal chandelier he’d ever seen. As he walked around searching for the lady that could help him with uncovering the truth, he heard soft music playing and turned his head to the left to see many gathering at the sides of the ball room and in the center of it were two people dancing slowly together. Everyone was watching them attentively with empty smiles on their faces.

Must be the newly engaged couple, he thought mindlessly as he turned his attention back towards the tables. He had heard the announcement in the distance but none of it mattered to him. What mattered was finding the lady his sister allegedly stole from. Junho had begrudgingly revealed her name and described her only after Inho promised not to do anything crazy.

So much for that promise…

Junho would kill him if he knew that he walked among the rich while wearing one of their ridiculously expensive suits. He’d probably have a heart attack.

Inho looked around at the mostly empty tables and found one where an older woman sat alone, sipping champagne. She wore a diamond necklace that shined in the dimmed space and a maroon coat dress that was accented with white fur around her shoulders. Of course she also wore the matching maroon gloves that weren’t even the focus of her hands compared to the multiple diamond bracelets on them.

Well, absurd amount of jewelry, check.
Sitting when everyone else would stand, check.
Drinking champagne with a constant knowing smile on her face, check.
That definitely looks like the woman Junho described.

The famous mrs. Kang.

Inho approached her slowly, a small nervous smile. “Hello Mrs. Kang, my name is Daeho, Kang Daeho” he bowed politely. He watched her set down her glass slowly to stare at him properly. Her smile hadn’t wavered though and that relaxed him a bit. “Nice to meet you. You said Kang? Don’t tell me we’re related,” she chuckled and looked at him expectantly.

“Actually we’re-” before he could make up any excuse on how they could possibly be related, she spoke up again. “Ah I know! You’re from Han’s side of the family, right? Her grandson?” Inho froze subtly trying not to look like the liar he was.

“Yes, precisely. I thought I’d come greet you,” he smiled politely and hoped the relief wasn’t showing on his face.
“Of course. Sit down Daeho,” she vaguely gestured to the empty seat next to her. He sat down and stared back towards the ball room, now filled with multiple people dancing.

“So do you live here?” He started talking and watched her twirl her glass slightly. “I wouldn’t say ‘live’ but I do spend a lot of time here throughout the year. You know my mansion gets too lonely sometimes. But here? Hah, something is always going on here,” she laughed quietly at something he probably didn’t understand.

“But is it safe here? I mean I heard there are safety problems. Even heard you were directly affected. Your necklace was stolen a few months ago, right?”

This was it, the moment of truth. Inho observed how she glanced at him with a confused smile, and he knew right then and there that his suspicion was right.

“Me? No, never. No one ever steals at the Grand Hotel. That’s what sets this place apart from other mundane hotels,” she tilted her head in curiosity and waited for him to elaborate.

Inho’s face remained blank. “So you never had your necklace stolen?”
She shook her head slowly, “never. I don’t even lock my door here. That’s how safe it is.”
Inho swallowed the lump in his throat while nodding absentmindedly.

Now what

“Well, I was just making sure you’re safe. We’re related after all,” he smiled back at her, and he could swear she had a knowing smirk on her face for one single second before her face went back to relaxed innocence. Well, Inho didn’t care if she had him figured out. He didn’t care about anything right now.

He needed air.

Needed to get out of this empty superficial place and now. “Well, it was nice to meet you Mrs. Kang, I wish you a wonderful evening,” he stood up quickly, bowing once again.
“Going so soon already?” She smiled at him but didn’t push, not out of concern but rather because she knew that if entertainment is over, then it’s over. He merely nodded with a short-lived smile and turned to walk towards the veranda.

When he went through the open doors, he knew this distance wasn’t enough. He needed to get so far away till he couldn’t see a single pretentious person and couldn’t hear that damn music anymore. He looked around the large empty veranda and saw a small set of stairs hidden on the back left side of it. He walked down the stairs and found a pathway filled with trees that led to several directions. He looked at all directions and let his instincts guide him down the smallest one of the bunch. He walked five whole minutes in the trees filled path until he reached another crossing. This time it looked like there was only one direction to follow but before he took that step something in him stopped. He was looking at the ground and happened to see that there was another small path. A path that looked unused to the point that grass had grown back over the fading tiles.

If there were tiles it meant it led somewhere and if it looks unused, then it meant there wouldn’t be anyone.

Just what he needed.

He followed the small path for a minute until it cleared into the most beautiful view he’d seen in this place so far. Forget about crystal and gold, this was real beauty.

The path became an empty clearing by the water, the river.

He could see a small promenade down there. He looked around until he found the stairs that led directly to the small hidden promenade by the water. There were two levels of it. One level you take the stairs to go to and there you find a single bench. However, to get to the even lower level you had to jump down the first level, over the brown half wall connecting both. The lower level was completely empty and had nothing but the view to offer. It was closer to the water, but Inho found it enough to sit down on the edge of the half wall, his feet hanging between both floors.

Just a small waterfront walkway hidden by all the trees, paths, and half walls.

It was beautiful.

He stared at the water and the night sky, taking apart every information he found out and wondered.

What the hell should he do now?

Gihun needed to breathe. This was getting too overwhelming for him. Every smile and hug and congratulations made him want to scream and disappear to his room. But every time he almost excused himself, he’d find Sangwoo smiling at him happily and he found himself smiling back every time. He was coping with it and dancing his worries away with Sangwoo and it was fine really. Until people started bringing up their wedding date.

Gihun couldn’t do it anymore. Here they were, barely engaged for an hour and yet people still aren’t satisfied. He decided he needed a break desperately. He excused himself from his mother and Sangwoo, saying he needed to use the toilet and that he’d be back soon. He moved before his mother suggested someone assist him with something as easy as going to the bathroom. Fleeing the party silently and heading out of one of the glass doors of the veranda.

He knew where to go.

Inho touched the ground with both hands, gripping it tightly. They had lied about his sister stealing. But why? Mrs. Kang wasn’t even aware of anything being stolen. Why the hell would the owner of this huge hotel want to frame his sister to fire her? She wouldn’t have to go that far to frame a floor manager. So why did she? And where did Saebyeok go? Why didn’t she write him a letter about any of this?

Nothing is making sense, and he wouldn’t leave until it did.

Then suddenly, a voice interrupted his thoughts.

“I see that my secret hiding place is no longer a secret.” Inho turned his head quickly at the sound. Looking up at the stairs that connected the clearing and the first floor he saw a figure standing on the first step of the stairs.

A figure who was only barely illuminated by the moonlight.

“Sorry. I’ll leave,” he stood up quickly before the male voice spoke up again.

“It’s fine, you already found it. No point in leaving now,” Inho could hear the humour in his voice and squinted to see who the man was. Thankfully, he didn’t need to wait long because the man started walking down the stairs towards the floor where Inho stood.

Inho recognized the familiar looking man. It was the man who was dancing a while ago. The newly engaged.

Wait…

This wasn’t just any man. That was Seong Gihun. The son of the owners.
Inho straightened up slightly, taking a proper look at the man for the very first time. The man was dressed in an elegant beige and white suit. He had dark longish fluffy curls, unruly even in their precise style. His eyes were big, and he didn’t just mean the size of the irises but also the depth in them. Inho had never really seen eyes that could be so endless in their depth. Those very eyes were staring at him curiously with small smile on his tilted head.

He was probably waiting for Inho to answer, to say anything at this point.

He cleared his throat, “well, if it’s any consolation, I only just found the place by accident. I don’t think anyone else ever comes here.”
Gihun whose head was still tilted to the side, looking at him up and down in curiosity and suddenly smiled just a bit wider.

“I hope so. Else it would kind of defeat the purpose of being secret. You know?”

“Of course. I’ll keep your secret then. I promise,” he said quickly and saw the grin on Gihun’s face grow a bit more.
“Thank you,” he replied and Inho was wondering if he should leave now without a word or just continue whatever this conversation was.

Luckily, Gihun made the decision for him.
“Do you have a cigarette?”
Inho looked up and blinked in small surprise at the question. Gihun huffed in amusement at his expression. “Yeah, I know omegas aren’t allowed to smoke until they were married but I like to when I’m stressed. So do you have one?”

Wait what, omega?

Inho’s surprised expression deepened with his eyebrows now raised slightly. He had been merely surprised that Gihun wanted to continue their talk. He hadn’t even realized he was an omega. Come to think of it, he had to be and as though right on time, only now did he notice the scent radiating from the man.

Daisies and jasmines. He smelled like fresh daisies and jasmines. Not the faint bouquet smell but that of a whole field on a sunny day. It was… lovely.

“I- I think I do,” he searched around in his pocket until he found the cheap cigarette pack he still had from the city. He felt a bit embarrassed that he didn’t have fancy cigars that matched the outfit and image but to his surprise Gihun only brightened up at the sight of cigarettes and took one out for himself, whispering a quiet thank you as he did.

Wait, Inho didn’t have matches anymore.

“I don’t have a lighter,” he said quickly. Gihun’s gaze left the cigarette and focused back on him. “It’s fine, I got one,” Inho saw Gihun taking out a golden lighter from his pocket.
It was so gold it shined in the darkness but somehow it managed to look simple.

It was beautiful.

Gihun lit up his cigarette quickly and then held out a hand with the lighter for him. “Here, smoke with me so we can share two secrets,” he smiled teasingly.

Inho’s eyes flickered from the lighter to the man holding it.

Well, wasn’t he a strange man…

Inho took the lighter and thought of something as he lit up the cigarette.

“Why are you stressed?”
“Huh?” Gihun looked a bit off guard at the question but then looked away in embarrassment. There was short beat of silence where Inho wondered if had overstepped but Gihun surprisingly answered in a friendly manner.

“Well, uh- I get overwhelmed easily. I’m not really the party type,” he smiled sheepishly and Inho tilted his own head slightly in surprise for few seconds before nodding slowly in understanding. “Yeah, me neither,” he looked away when Gihun’s slightly widened eyes snapped to his. He’d probably excepted any type of answer that wouldn’t understand but undermine.

Guess he was also surprising.

Both men stared at the empty night sky, only hearing the sounds of water clashing softly. It was almost comforting being out here with someone instead of being alone with the overwhelming thoughts.

“So, what makes this place so secret?” He found himself asking out of real curiosity instead of just thinking of something to fill the silence.
And for some reason he wanted to diverge from the other topic to cheer the man up a bit. He seemed a bit overwhelmed when he talked about the party.

Gihun didn’t look at him but smiled wistfully, “it was my dad’s favourite hiding place. Whenever the hotel or my mother got too much, he’d come here to unwind. At some point he started bringing me here too.” A chuckle echoed in the night and Inho turned his head to it in attention. “Mostly when I argued with my mother. He’d sneak us out and she’d get more angry because she couldn’t find us.” Inho’s mouth quirked up slightly without him even noticing.

Gihun’s smile weakened slightly before dropping the cigarette to ground and squashing it with his shoe. “Well, I should be getting back before she gets angry again,” he glanced at Inho with a smile and Inho found himself smiling back sincerely.

Gihun turned towards the stairs before stopping suddenly. He turned his head to Inho, frowning curiously. “You didn’t tell me your name?”
Inho didn’t skip a beat. “Kang Daeho.”
Gihun smiled again and nodded. “I’m Gihun. Don’t forget to keep your promise Daeho,” he smirked for a second before turning back to leave.
Leaving Inho to stare at his retreating form.

What an odd man.

Inho didn’t imagine any of the Seongs to be so…so nice.

He’d heard anything but that. From Junho and even from Saebyeok. But come to think of it, Saebyeok had mentioned in her old letters that Gihun was nicer than the rest and that unlike the others he treated them like humans. Like equals.
Then again Gihun didn’t know his real identity. He thought Inho was a rich man like him and maybe that’s why he was nice. Yeah, that had to be it. He looked back at the water and remembered tonight’s events before Gihun came out of the blue and distracted him. He needs to talk to Junho and figure out what to do next.

Gihun closed his suite door after wishing Sangwoo goodnight. He was alone at last. Taking a deep breath, Gihun walked to the closest window and opened it. He didn’t know why but he just needed the feel of the fresh air again. He stared at the glowing river in the distance and remembered his odd secret encounter.

When Gihun had gone to his spot, he hadn’t expected to find anyone there and when he did see someone sitting on the ground with his feet just hanging aimlessly in the air, he wanted to scream. This was his safe space. His dad’s secret. He almost turned around and left again but then he didn’t when he noticed how far away that man was mentally.
It made him pause.
He’d never seen someone so lost in thought before. So utterly lost in thought that he hadn’t even noticed him approaching.
It intrigued him because it was an anomaly in a world full of superficially bored people. None of the people up there could ever sit like that alone with their thoughts…
But this man did it so easily. Gihun had decided that he couldn’t stop this man from being there, so might as well get what he had desperately needed.

A break.

The man was a complete mystery to him. From appearance, he looked just like everyone else up in the hotel. Glammed up, elegant, attractive. But what made him a mystery, what made him unlike all others, is that he looked so haunted.

Unlike all of the other guests he didn’t look comfortable in his skin, he didn’t look bored or entertained, he didn’t toss his smiles around carelessly like the rest. On the contrary, he was careful with them. Like he was reserving them for real emotions only.

It surprised Gihun that despite how reserved, quiet and careful the stranger was, he was still a complete gentleman. Usually when rich people are introverted, well, they’re complete dicks to anyone who disrupts their peace. But not him, no. He’d only been kind, listening to him rant about being overwhelmed at his own party without judging. Offering an ear and quiet understanding. Not to mention how serious he was about his promise to keep his place a secret. It made a corner of his mouth twitch slightly.

Gihun had surprised himself by not kicking the man out of the place immediately. He’d also surprised himself by approaching the man, let alone opening up about his anxiety to a complete stranger.

Gihun didn’t know why he did any of that.

Maybe he was just desperate to find someone normal, who wouldn’t smile at him soullessly.

The more he thought about it the less his behavior made sense. The guy was clearly an alpha. It was dangerous to be so far away from the hotel without anyone’s knowledge and then stumble across an alpha, but something in him wasn’t scared at all from the moment he got there.
Maybe it was his clothes that indicated high status? No, there were plenty of rich jerks.
Maybe it was his calm demeanor?
Or was it his scent? He smelled like pine. Like a rain-soaked pine tree. Or rather a whole rich forest. It reminded him of the days his dad took him out to forests in the north. He loved and cherished those days. That must be why he had felt that he could trust this man.

This man, Daeho, helped him more than he could know. After their short talk had gone back to his father, Gihun remembered how happy his father was for his and Sangwoo’s future engagement.

His father would’ve wanted this.

The memory of his dad made him instinctively reach into his pocket to take out his dad’s golden lighter. His final gift to him.

Gihun frowned when he couldn’t find it in his pocket. Panicking, he searched his other pockets before widening his eyes in a sudden epiphany.

He’d left his lighter. With Daeho…

Well shit.

Inho was waiting for Junho to return from his night shift. When he finally came back Inho didn’t beat around the bush.
“You were wrong.” Junho frowned in confusion. “Mrs. Kang said her necklace was never stolen. In fact, she guarantees that nothing ever got stolen from her,” he observed Junho’s face carefully. There was no doubt that he was hiding something. The way he averted his gaze proved it.

“Junho.Whatever you know, you need to tell me about it now,” his tone left no room for arguments. Junho sighed and walked towards his bed, sitting down before staring at him sadly. “Look I didn’t want to say it because I know it will be difficult for-”

“Junho.”

“Fine. A month before Saebyeok was fired. I happened to be delivering a drink to guest at night and I- I saw-” Junho swallowed carefully and Inho wasn’t liking where this was heading at all. “Saw her with our manager Cho Sangwoo. They were standing outside his suite and… well he looked way too friendly…” Junho stared at him anxiously, but Inho could only stare back blankly.

“Friendly.” It wasn’t a question, but Junho nodded reluctantly.

His sister had a thing with the general manager? Seong Gihun’s fiancé?

“You-”
“I swear I’m not lying Inho. I wanted you to leave because of this. I- I didn’t want to make it worse for you.” Junho was telling the truth. He knew that because he was good at knowing when someone was lying and also because Junho was one the most simple and kindest people he’d ever met and as much as it pained him in this moment, he trusted him.

“So, you think she was fired because of him?”

Junho relaxed on his bed when he felt that Inho wasn’t angry with him.

“I don’t know but it would make sense. It would even make more sense now especially after his and Gihunssi’s engagement.”

Inho nodded silently and twirled the nearly forgotten lighter in his hand. Gihun had forgotten it, but Inho hadn’t.

He’d have to find a way to return it and find a way to find out more about Cho Sangwoo.

The next morning…

“What do you mean? Could you please check his name in the visiting guests list then?” Gihun was frowning at the receptionist, waiting for an answer that would bring him closer to his lighter.
The receptionist, Ali pursed his lips and shook his head again. “I’m sorry sir. There’s no one called Kang Daeho here. Not as a staying nor a visiting guest.”

Gihun’s frown deepened.

So, what his lighter was gone forever? Was he out there alone with a liar?

He nodded absentmindedly and walked aimlessly in the main hall. Then he heard him. He turned his head quickly at the sound to find him standing in a-

A black uniform?

Serving mrs. Kang a drink?

Chatting quietly with her?

He had a tag on his uniform that read Oh Youngil.

Youngil?

What the fuck?

After moments of being completely stunned by the sight, he took determined steps towards them; his frown deeper than it has been in a long time. He cleared his throat, glaring at Dae- Youngil. Youngil’s face blanched the moment he saw him.

“Ah! Gihun, come meet my relative Daeho.” Gihun’s glare vanished as he looked at Mrs. Kang politely. Smiling a smile that he knew for a fact didn’t reach his eyes.

“He’s pretending to be an undercover waiter here so he can prepare for an upcoming movie he’s starring in!” Mrs. Kang looked delighted while the so called Daeho looked very, very uncomfortable.

What the fuck?

Gihun’s fake smile faltered for a second before he plastered it on again and looked at Daeho murderously— with the smile intact— “Is that so?”

Daeho cleared his throat and nodded quickly, making sure to stare anywhere but at Gihun.

“Well then Daeho,” he made sure to draw out the name so that the other man looked at him. “Make sure to take a break.” He tilted his head subtly towards the direction of the veranda, his eyes still glaring, before he excused himself from Mrs. Kang and walked towards the veranda.

Inho watched him go in silence. Knowing that his time here was potentially up. This man could absolutely ruin him now. Inho sighed deeply after excusing himself from Mrs. Kang.

He’ll have to tell him everything or else,

He’s screwed…

Chapter Text

Gihun was losing his mind, he had to be. Pacing around his secret place waiting for… what the hell should he even call him now?

He had so many so questions. For one, why the fuck was he lying? Was he pretending last night or is he pretending today? Who was this man?

And undercover actor, really???

Gihun looked incredulous at the last part. Who even comes up with this?

He tried to calm himself down and tried not to question why this bothered him so much. Not that he didn’t have the right to be angry, but something about last night being a performance really irked him.

Especially when it took place here.

Inho looked at the pacing man in the distance and sighed deeply. He hoped that what Junho and Saebyeok said about Seong Gihun was true and that he would at least understand where he was coming from.

He held the golden lighter in his fist and walked down the stairs to where Gihun looked absolutely livid.

“Who are you? Daeho or Youngil?” Surprisingly his tone was quiet. It almost didn’t match the anger on his face.

No beating around the bush then...

Inho looked at him apologetically, “neither.”

Gihun’s glare turned into sharp surprise for about two seconds before going back to a glare.

“My name is Hwang Inho, I-… I’m searching for my sister Hwang Saebyeok. She used to work here for years.” Inho’s apologetic eyes remained steady on Gihun’s, watching as the glare turned into surprise and recognition at his sister’s name.

“Saebyeok?” He questioned with a frown. Inho nodded and continued, “she used to send me letters regularly but six months ago she stopped and when I came to check on her, they said she had been fired for stealing Mrs Kang’s necklace.”

Gihun’s frown deepened at the words, voicing his own thoughts without meaning to. “Theft? That doesn’t sound like her.” When Gihun noticed Inho frowning in confusion he looked away at the ground for a moment. “I remember her. She worked here for a long time. She was a quiet girl but always kind to those who deserved it,” he smiled for a second before looking back at Inho carefully.

Inho couldn’t help his own surprise at the revelation.

He remembered his sister? And he didn’t think she’d steal either?

Definitely a strange man.

“Exactly. She would never do that, and I confirmed it yesterday when I questioned Mrs Kang who assured me that nothing was ever stolen from her.”

Gihun’s frown deepened once again but this time in confusion. “But then-”

“Why was she really fired?” Inho finished the question for him while Gihun raised his eyebrows slightly.

“That’s what I’m trying to find out. But I’ll need to stay here a bit longer to do that,” Inho looked at Gihun cautiously, observing the distrust and confusion on his face and in his scent.

“Please allow me to stay here as Youngil for a few more days. Just until I find her,” Inho pleaded carefully. Gihun frowned at him before looking around and shaking his head, but the head shake was not aimed at him. It looked more like an internal dilemma he was facing.

Inho allowed himself to show a bit of vulnerability on his face. Just a glimmer of the worry he was feeling for his sister before looking at the ground. “I- I’m really worried about her. It’s not like her to stop writing to me. I know that wherever she is, she needs me.”

Gihun looked back at him with a sad frown. He looked at him, really looked at him for seconds that felt like minutes. Inho made sure to stare back at him, hoping desperately that the man would let him stay.

Silence…and then

Gihun sighed before walking slowly towards the bench behind them.

“Why share all this with me? Could’ve just lied,” Gihun frowned at him before sitting down on the bench.

Inho thought about it for a moment, realizing he hadn’t thought of lying to Gihun once. He thought carefully of what to say and decided to simply be truthful.

“Because I didn’t want you to think I was lying to you yesterday for no reason. I only did that to be able to talk to Mrs Kang. The other reason is that I heard that you were kind and that you respect people. I would never take advantage of someone like that.” Gihun’s frown eased slightly as he took in Inho’s sincere expression before looking down at his lap.

“So what? You expect me to take part in this?” He looked back up at him.

“No, I would never expect anything from you. All I ask is for you to give me a chance to find her,” he knew he sounded a bit desperate, but he didn’t care.

He’d grovel on knees if he had to.

Gihun’s frown grew weaker before finally nodding reluctantly and Inho felt like he could breathe again. “Thank you,” he whispered earnestly. Then, remembering the object in his hand, he held it out for Gihun who looked confused before brightening up at the sight of his lighter. He grabbed it quickly from Inho’s hand, their fingers touching for just a split second before they disconnected and Gihun looked away as he stood up to leave.

For the second time in less than one day, Inho found himself alone at Gihun’s hiding spot watching him leave while wondering how different a man could be from his family.

Later that afternoon.

Sangwoo entered his office, situated on the ground floor right across the lobby and right before the grand stairs of the hotel. He went to his desk and found a small letter waiting for him. Sitting down in his big leather chair, he opened the unnamed letter carelessly before reading it. The moment he read it, his face paled.

Congratulations on your promotion. But don’t let that make you forget about Saebyeok.

Sangwoo looked around the empty office before hurriedly walking towards the reception desk where Ali was checking some documents.

“Ali, did you see who entered my office and dropped this letter?”

Ali looked up nervously. “No sir, I didn’t see anyone,” he said, shaking his head.

Sangwoo turned back towards his office and ordered someone to bring Kang Noeul to his office.

He sat down in his chair and waited for her to arrive. She came in sauntering slightly with a small smirk on her face.

“You were in my office before, correct?”

“No, I was downstairs. You saw me,” she looked at him blankly. Sangwoo stood up carefully, taking careful menacing steps towards her. “I’m telling you now Noeul, don’t mess with me. Forget everything about me except for the fact that I’m your boss. Understood?”

She shot him a nasty smirk before leaving him with his confusion.

Who brought the letter?

Gihun stood outside his sister’s room with his arms crossed, waiting for the doctor to update them. It had been a terrifying last hour. He was standing here in this exact spot one hour ago, listening to the faint sound of arguments coming from the room. Junhee was arguing with Myunggi about him leaving to go visit his family again. It was routine by now. They’d argue about it every time and every time ended with Myunggi either surrendering to his wife’s demands or his parents’s. This time it sounded like he was choosing to go visit his sick father instead of staying with Junhee as she wished him to. Gihun had felt that Junhee didn’t try to understand where Myunggi was coming from. His dad was sick after all and while he ought to listen to his pregnant wife, she should also show some understanding and compassion.

Myunggi had opened the door with his suitcase in hand, walking away from an angry Junhee who walked right after him. “Myunggi, please stop. You can’t just leave every time they tell you to.”

Myunggi continued to walk towards the stairs quickly. “And you can’t expect me to stay every time you tell me to,” he argued back as he descended the stairs in a hurry.

Going after him quickly, Junhee didn’t notice a step and slipped suddenly, falling down the stairs right when Myunggi had reached the bottom. Gihun yelled in horror at the sight of his sister falling, running down the stairs himself as Myunggi dropped his bags and turned to run to her.

The memory almost made him flinch.

Gihun opened his eyes at the sound of the doctor leaving the room.

“Doctor! How is she?” Myunggi asked in a panic.

The doctor had an odd look on his face before nodding slowly. “She’ll be fine. She got lucky that the baby wasn’t hurt. She’ll need absolute rest and no stress, and I already handed her a prescription for some Vitamins,” he said in a formal tone before excusing himself.

Gihun pursed his lips sadly at Myunggi who still looked devastated despite the initial relief.

“At least she’ll be fine,” he said comfortingly.

“How do you expect me to be fine mother?” Junhee looked at her mother completely broken, crying silently.

She had lost her baby. Their baby. And the first thing her mother did was to tell the doctor to lie. To pretend that she still carried a soul inside of her. A real soul that had existed just over an hour ago. One that was no longer there.

“Listen to me, this is for the best. If your husband’s family were to find out that you lost the baby and that you can’t get pregnant again, they will definitely make sure you get divorced,” her mother said in an even and borderline professional tone. It was unnerving just how normally she spoke under these circumstances.

“And now what? I’ll just carry a pillow the next months and give birth to air?” Junhee wanted to punch something. She wasn’t being given the time or space to even grieve. She had to pretend that her whole world didn’t just change.

“How do you expect me to play along? To act like everything is fine? Why are you so cold about this? I just lost my child mother! My only child,” Junhee couldn’t keep her tears at bay anymore, crying while gripping her now empty belly.

“Junhee, you need to wake up! If you want to keep your marriage, you’ll do as I say. You will play along, and we will find you a baby of your own. You won’t let him feel anything. Understood?” Her mother looked at her warningly until she nodded back.

A knock on the door interrupted the tension and before any other word could be said, Myunggi and Gihun entered the room both sitting on each side of the bed and comforting her. Myunggi kept apologizing endlessly promising never to leave her again and all Junhee could do was let the silent tears fall.

Later in another suite.

“Madame Seong, you asked for me?” Ms Jang closed the door behind her. She’s been ordered to come to the Madame’s suite alone.

“You had told me about one of the girls being pregnant. Who was it?”

Ms Jang paused for a moment before answering. “Kang Noeul. She’s a floor manager.”

Madame Seong nodded once. “Don’t fire her. Let her stay and tell her to come to my suite tonight.” Ms Jang frowned at the sudden change of heart but didn’t question the orders.

Leaving the suite, Jang was more annoyed than ever. She had wanted that skank to leave as quickly as possible. She was poison and Geumja knew that she was most poisonous to her son Junho who was an absolute fool for her.

Junho, her idiot too kindhearted son who tried to convince her that unborn child was his. He’d found out that she was going to fire Noeul for being pregnant and unmarried and he rushed to her defence immediately, claiming it had been child. Jang couldn’t believe it. It’s frankly laughable because Noeul ignored Junho every time he tried to even look at her. No, it wasn’t his son. She just knows it.

Jang headed downstairs to find her. Her mind filled with never ending thoughts. Noeul must’ve done something to be protected that way. It simply didn’t make sense for the Madame to tell her to have Noeul fired a day ago and then change her mind so drastically merely 24 hours later.

Meanwhile, Noeul stood in front of Junho’s room waiting for him to return. She watched him approach the room tiredly before noticing that she was there. The sudden glow on his face was almost adorable. “Noeul! What are you doing here?” He smiled shyly.

“I heard you talk to your mother today. You told her the child was yours,” she smiled timidly and lowered her head in embarrassment.

“Yes, and I meant it,” he admitted softly.

“Junho, you don’t have to do this. You can tell her the truth and free yourself from any responsibility.” She looked up at him and smiled.

Junho looked at her, utterly smitten. “The truth? Noeul the truth is that I love you and that I’d be honoured to be the baby’s father.” Noeul smiled at him wider than she had ever before and the sight made Junho’s heart stop.

“You’re the kindest man I’ve ever met,” she glanced at him shyly, looking through her eyelashes.

Never mind, now his heart was truly stopping.

Before he could respond however, his mother showed up out of the blue. Completely ruining any moment, they could’ve had.

“There you are,” Jang looked at Noeul unimpressed. “Madame wants to see you in her suite.” Noeul’s smirk dropped, her face paling.

“Why?”

“We didn’t have tea together; she ordered me to tell you. So go!” She glared at Noeul as she left before turning to the nervous Junho who looked like he was itching to follow her.

“What do you think you’re doing here? Off to work,” she said firmly before turning to leave.

“Mom stop,” he went to stand in front of her.

“Why are you so harsh on Noeul? Why can’t you just accept that the kid is mine?”

Jang looked at her son furiously. “Because I know that you wouldn’t do that. I know you’re better than getting a girl pregnant like that! And I know for a fact that you two aren’t in love!” Her voice was loud booming through the empty hallway. A testament to her frustration.

“I AM in love with her! And you’re right, I’m better than that which is why I decided to marry Noeul and raise the baby together as a family,” Junho’s own voice was loud too, anger clouding his judgement. His anger clouded him from seeing how his words broke something in his mom.

“No- no you won’t,” she said with her eyes suddenly wide and frantic.

“I will! And you can’t stop it,” he countered back immediately. He was done with being pushed around and treated like a child. He would protect the woman he loved, even if it’s from his own mother.

“Junho, please you’re too young for this. You- you’ll regret it,” Junho suddenly noticed his mother wasn’t arguing with her full force, in fact she looked weak and was breathing heavily.

“Mom?” Right as he said it, his mother collapsed to the floor completely unconscious.

“MOM?!” Junho fell to his knees next to her and held her shoulders, shaking her frantically.

“Mom, wake up! Mom please! HELP!” Suddenly Inho appeared down the hallway, running towards him. “What happened?!”

“Inho help!” Inho immediately gripped Ms Jang and hoisted her up carefully, carrying her bridal style towards her room. Trusting Inho with his mom, Junho ran to find Gihun. Gihun would be able to get help for his mom.

An hour later, Gihun sat by Jang’s bed waiting for her to wake up. He’d panicked when Junho ran towards him screaming that his mother was sick. Gihun hated this day already. Between Junhee’s accident and now this… it was all too much. But still, Gihun started smiling at Jang when she started waking up.

“There you are! You had us worried,” his smile grew when Jang smiled at the sound of his voice. “I’m fine,” she said weakly.

“No, you’re not,” came Junho’s worried voice. He sat by the table in the center of the room, in front of the bed with Inho sitting on the other chair watching everything unfold. Jang frowned at him sourly as though she was telling him that it was his fault and Junho seems to have understood it because he looked away in shame.

Gihun looked between the both of them, eyes snapping to Inho questioningly. Inho shrugged subtly in response, not knowing what was going on either. Gihun turned his head back to Jang smiling at her. “I got you something!” He took out a hidden object he had placed on the floor and placed it in his lap. All three pairs of eyes stared at it curiously before realizing what it was.

It was a medium sized gramophone. A beautiful golden piece adjoined to a shiny mahogany box. It was simple yet stunning.

“Now you can listen to music and relax more,” he grinned at her before rambling about how to navigate it. While the others paid attention to Gihun and stared at the box in awe, Inho had stopped listening and just stared. But not at the box but at the man holding it.

How was this guy real?

No one would ever just do this for an employee. No one would ever just care this much about others without expecting anything in return. The way he did it so naturally too, so happily caused Inho to feel an unexpected small tug at his heart. There was something so innocent about the way Gihun smiled without a care, without any walls. It made Inho want to protect him from everything and nothing. Make sure he never lost that kindness, that innocence.

Right as that thought came Inho realized he was staring. He looked away towards the floor and told himself that he was just impressed. Ignoring the feeling that he was positively bewitched at that moment. Because Inho has simply never met someone like Seong Gihun.

After making sure she was alright, Gihun turned to Junho with a comforting smile on his face, “She’ll be fine don’t worry! Also don’t forget, she’s my mom too so don’t bother her,” he teased Junho before turning his happy gaze to Inho. “Nice to meet you In-”

“Youngil,” Junho and Inho both interrupted in unison and Gihun froze, looking at both with wide eyes for about five seconds before settling on a small reluctant smile.

In the evening, Inho sat by the table with Saebyeok’s diary in hand before closing it harshly. He’d finished reading it and frankly he felt a bit sick. He went to the sink and splashed his face with water and tried to think of what to do next. The diary that confirmed Junho’s words. There had been something between Saebyeok and Sangwoo. Something that made him want to claw his eyes out in sheer frustration. The diary only talked about how nice Sangwoo was to her and how he’d tell her to drop formalities between them. It mentioned how she and Sangwoo had made plans for a future.

A future that certainly didn’t look like the one they were in now.

The diary also said other things. Things he’d known. For example, that Junho was kind to her and that he was a good friend. Another thing he’d already guessed was that Gihun was even more kind than what her letters to him had described. But there were also other things he hadn’t known. For example, that Sangwoo apparently told her that he didn’t really want to marry Gihun and that it was an arranged plan made by Mr Seong against his wishes. Another thing that piqued his interest was the fact that Ali, the receptionist apparently liked her? Or paid attention to her. Something Inho wasn’t sure was platonic or not.

It was all too much for him to handle and Inho was beginning to fear where this is heading.

He decided that his next course of action would be to keep an eye on Ali the receptionist but more importantly to fully stalk Sangwoo.

He had a bad feeling about this man. His instincts told him he had to follow him, and he always trusted his instincts.

Keeping an eye on Ali was surprisingly not that difficult. He was stuck behind the reception desk and Inho was serving and taking orders from guests in the main hall which is adjoined to the lobby. He observed him as much as possible and the man was acting perfectly. Friendly professional smiles and gestures. However, Inho’s instincts were better than his acting because he could see the very subtle cracks in his otherwise perfect façade.

He’d see the one second where his eye would twitch at the sight of Sangwoo leaving his office. Whenever Sangwoo showed his face, something in Ali would change for a split second and it intrigued Inho to no end. When Sangwoo came out of his office looking a bit nervous like something unexpected had happened to him in the safety of his office, Inho made sure to look at Ali whose face didn’t frown in slight confusion like his own when saw Sangwoo acting nervous. Instead, Ali looked completely indifferent.

But

There was this spark in his eyes. Like he knew something Inho didn’t. Like he knew exactly what was making Sangwoo nervous.

Before Inho could decide what to do with all of this, Gihun suddenly came down the big stairs, walking to Sangwoo with a small smile on his face. Inho watched them talk for a few seconds before Sangwoo held his arm out, linking in it with Gihun’s and walking out of the hotel. Inho watched them walk out and decided in a split second to follow them.

He had to follow Sangwoo around anyway. That was his goal today.

It absolutely had nothing to do with Gihun and the way he had plastered on an almost convincing smile at Sangwoo. A smile that Sangwoo clearly saw as good enough.

He started walking after them.

Inho followed them from a far standing on the back end of the veranda as he saw them take the small stairs towards the endless paths. For a second he thought they were heading to the secret place. For some reason, the thought of someone like Sangwoo going to a beautiful place like that annoyed him on a deep level. He already knew deep down that that man could never deserve to know that place.

He sighed in relief when he saw them walk a different, more open path. He had a clear view of them without needing to get closer. He watched them talk and then saw Sangwoo hugging Gihun. Gihun was faced towards him, and he looked happy, relaxed. Even on the verge of melting as he went to place his head at Sangwoo’s shoulder but as he did, he reflexively looked up and saw him.

Shit.

He was caught.

Gihun’s eyes widened comically and Inho knew without even being Sangwoo that Gihun was probably very tense in his arms.

Because of him.

Gihun stepped away from the hug, his wide eyes on Inho until the moment Sangwoo stared at him. Then he plastered on the same imperfect smile before snapping his gaze to Inho for just a single second. Inho knew by the warning look of it that Gihun would want to have words with him soon. He sighed and already made his way towards the secret place.

It would be the second time Inho went to the secret spot knowing that Gihun was about to be livid with him and Inho found himself wondering how many times that would happen.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Gihun approached Inho angrily. Inho stood in front of the bench and sighed tiredly.

If Gihun was angry now, then he wouldn’t like Inho’s explanation at all.

“What was that? Are you following me?” Inho shook his head before sighing again.

There goes nothing…

“I wasn’t following you. I was following him,” he said quietly, staring at Gihun calmly.

“Why? Why the hell would you follow my fiancé and me? What did you hope to see?” He frowned half angry and half incredulous, waving his hands in the air in confusion.

“Look, I found my sister’s diary and some letters in her old room. She had hidden them in a secret compartment in the floor. I read them and-”

Inho paused and took a deep breath bracing the imminent storm. How the hell is he supposed to say this. To Gihun of all people.

“She wrote about Sangwoo. They- they had a thing…” Inho opened his clenched eyes and saw Gihun look at him blankly.

“Excuse me what?”

“She wrote that they had a thing and-”

“Do you know what you’re saying? To whom about who? Are you crazy?!” Gihun hadn’t looked livid before. Now he definitely did.

“I know it sounds crazy, but she wrote it in her private diary.”

“You’re lying! Or she is the liar,” Gihun raised his voice in anger and this time Inho didn’t try to calm him down or deescalate the situation. Instead, he frowned deeply and started arguing back with his own anger. He’s usually a very calm person to the point that others found his calmness unnerving, but he wouldn’t let anyone call his sister a liar. No matter who it was. 

“My sister isn’t a liar. She wouldn’t lie in her own private diary, she doesn’t have any reason to do so and I sure as hell don’t care enough about your relationship to make up any lie, especially one that would involve my missing sister,” he didn’t yell. He didn’t have to. His words were sharp, cutting like a knife. He saw Gihun’s anger slowly dissipate at the display of his own. Gihun’s frown was still in place but no longer out to attack, just standing in silence and wrestling with the aftermath of Inho’s words.

Inho frowned at Gihun one last time before leaving him standing alone for the first time.

Gihun walked back to the hotel five minutes later. His head was spinning after Inho’s words.

They had a thing.

He couldn’t wrap his head around that part. Sangwoo had been so devoted to him throughout all of their lives. To the point that Gihun would feel horrible about it. Sangwoo always gave more than he did. Said more. Felt more.

But now Inho’s words opened the door of something he was scared of. If Sangwoo had an affair or fling with Saebyeok and was able to hide it so well, then what else was he capable of hiding? And did Saebyeok’s words warrant Inho following Sangwoo like her disappearance was his fault?

He had so many questions.

For some reason, he dislikes the way Inho and him ended the conversation. Inho seems so quiet and incredibly calm, not that he really knew the man but still. Gihun had accused his sister of lying and even then, he didn’t yell or try to intimidate him. He just said logical things that Gihun couldn’t argue with.

Why would she lie in her diary? Unless she was delusional or something. And Inho didn’t have a reason to lie either.

He frowned as he felt a headache approaching. He needed to talk to Sangwoo.

Surely, he’ll have a reasonable explanation.

He waited after dinner to get Sangwoo to walk with him. Arms linked, Gihun stared at the trees around them and took a deep breath.

“Do you remember Hwang Saebyeok?” He glanced casually at Sangwoo whose face tensed imperceptibly before looking back at him.

“Yeah. Why?” He sounded casual enough. Still Gihun felt his tense arm and careful tone.

He continued anyway.

“Where is she? I heard she was fired a while back for stealing from Mrs. Kang,” he looked at Sangwoo steadily.

“If you know that then why are you asking?” Sangwoo frowned in subtle annoyance rather than confusion.

“Just wondering if you knew where she went after? It’s odd because they said she-” Sangwoo stepped back unlinking their arms in the process.

“And who are they?” He looked at him expectantly, suspiciously.

Gihun’s eyes widened slightly in surprise. “Staff,” he blurted out quickly.

“Gihun, I told you not to make casual conversation with the servants,” he said tiredly and Gihun could only frown at the language. Servants. The way that cruel word meant to degrade was thrown around so carelessly made him bristle.

“And I told you; I don’t see them that way. Ms. Jang told me, and she is family,” his voice grew stern. A silent warning. One that Sangwoo listened to.

He knew he could never speak against Jang in Gihun’s presence.

Never.

“Anyway, she told me that Saebyeok stole a necklace from Mrs Kang, but Mrs Kang told me that nothing was ever stolen.” Gihun raised his eyebrows expectantly waiting for an answer to calm him and Inho down.

Sangwoo looked around before settling his blank stare back on him.

“She did steal. But not from Mrs Kang. She stole from us.” Gihun frowned at the new information.

What?

He waited for Sangwoo to continue.

“She was stealing valuable alcoholic beverages from the storage and selling them to Kim, a pub owner downtown.” He sighed heavily before tilting his head at Gihun. “So, who else do you want to spend the night talking about?”

Gihun continued to frown but didn’t say a word, letting Sangwoo pull him back into the walk.

He needed to let Inho know.

Later, Inho sat at the pub, the open night sky above him, foggy and hazy. His foot was tapping in rapid speed against the almost sandy ground. He’d gotten Gihun’s message through Junho, telling him of Sangwoo’s words.

He’d left the hotel as soon as his shift was over, his mind unable to cope with the possibility of his sister being a thief.

He prayed she wasn’t. Prayed that Sangwoo was lying.

And he isn’t a religious person.

He waited for Kim to come to him, watching the man approach his table with a relaxed smile. Inho didn’t wait.

“Is it true that you sell stolen drinks from the Grand Hotel? That you let naïve girls working there help you?” His face was staring at Kim ice cold. Not a single muscle moving.

Kim blinked in surprise before looking away. Looking at the ground for a few seconds as the dots began to connect in his head. He looked up at Inho, hesitant.

“What was your sister’s name?”

Inho knew without even saying it that it was over. It was true. It was her.

His sister was a thief…

Inho didn’t know how long he’d walked. His feet kept moving after he’d confirmed it with Kim. He spent the whole night walking aimlessly, his entire body and soul frozen in shock and sadness.

How did his sister, his sister, get this way? How could the sister he had raised be like that. He’d taught her to be independent, strong and most importantly fair.

Granted, they didn’t get much time together before life torn them away from one another but still. He’d expected better from her, and he’d expected better from himself.

How could he let things go this far?

How did he not see the signs?

How did it turn out that he didn’t know her as well as he should’ve?

All of these questions kept pounding in his head, pushing him into an endless abyss of doubt, self loathing and regret. This was on him too. He’d left her to fend for herself in a cruel world, he’d let her down.

He’d let himself down.

He walked for so long, only staring blankly at the ground beneath him until he surprised himself when he suddenly stopped. He didn’t notice that his feet had taken him to the secret place. His shock, hurt and disappointment were etched so deep he didn’t even notice dawn and the distant rays of the sun lighting up the sky in a beautiful golden orange hue.

He jumped over to the lower floor of the promenade and leaned on the cement wall railing that separated him from the flowing river. He stayed there, staring numbly at the sky and the water trying to escape his mind with no avail.

He could either think of what his sister had done or of the fact that the dark feeling in the pit of his stomach kept growing. He didn’t know how he could feel sad, disappointed, angry, worried and absolutely terrified all at once.

There was a storm inside of him and he didn’t know how to calm it down. Didn’t know what to think or do anymore. Many things still didn’t make sense to him.

Why did they have to frame her something she didn’t do when they had another reason?

Where is she?

Then, a careful hand was touching his shoulder, bringing him back from a deep bottomless pit he was drowning in. He turned his head slightly to find Gihun staring at him with silent concern.

Gihun must’ve expected him to come here and confirm whether Sangwoo’s words had been true.

Oh, how he wished they weren’t…

“What happened?” A simple question that didn’t need answering. Inho’s broken expression was enough.

“It was true,” he murmured quietly in shame. It hurt saying it out loud and Gihun could feel the pain in his voice.

He frowned sadly but didn’t say anything, didn’t even remove his hand from his shoulder either and Inho found it anchoring, comforting, real.

“How could my little sister do that? I-” he couldn’t look at Gihun’s sad expression anymore. Not when it confirmed everything and made it real. Made it a thousand times sadder.

Gihun then dropped his hand from his shoulder and Inho felt colder.

“I’m sorry,” Gihun’s voice was barely a whisper and Inho wanted to laugh bitterly at the irony of Gihun apologizing even though it was his own sister that stole from Gihun’s family.

Instead, he swallowed heavily before speaking. Hoping the slight tremor in his voice wouldn’t be heard. “I can’t wrap my head around it. It’s like a puzzle that still doesn’t make sense. Why would they need to frame her for stealing the necklace when they had a valid reason to begin with?”

Inho expected Gihun to frown at the question, to argue, find excuses and possible reasons for his family. But once again, Gihun surprised him by merely nodding.

Just nodding.

That small act grounded him more than Gihun could ever know. It made him feel like he wasn’t alone or crazy. He had someone who understood or at least tried to.

It encouraged him to calm himself down and regain his rationality, regain control.

“I had asked Junho, and he confirmed that Sangwoo always did a regular checkup on the storage twice a month. So how did he not notice Saebyeok’s theft for months?” At this question, Gihun looked up in surprise as if he hadn’t realized that fact before.

“You’re right… I hadn’t thought of this before,” he trailed off quietly and Inho nodded, silently thankful for Gihun’s willingness to look at all sides.

Gihun then looked at him and hesitated for a few seconds, opening and closing his mouth indecisively.

Inho waited. Quiet but encouraging all the same.

“I can’t help but feel like Sangwoo was hiding something. It feels like he is hiding a whole other version of himself. Like there’s version of the man whom I love and loves me back that I’m scared of,” he confessed quietly. His quiet tone and embarrassed look were clear proof of his guilt for even admitting any of this.

Inho observed him carefully and chose to only nod in understanding and sympathy. If he were to say anything, he’d probably curse Sangwoo to the end of time. Besides it wasn’t the right moment to push Gihun any further. He was admitting being suspicious of his fiancé after all. To Inho of all people. A stranger.

Gihun was brave in his eyes for having the strength to do that. To question. To doubt. Even your loved one.

Inho unfortunately knew now how difficult that was…

“This whole still doesn’t make sense,” he offered him a small general out from the topic of Sangwoo. An offer Gihun looked slightly grateful for.

Then without meaning to, his voice cracked slightly, “I’m no closer to finding her.”

Gihun pursed his lips sadly before trying to catch his eyes. “We’ll find her.”

Small, simple yet it meant the world to Inho.

They’d do it.

Together.

As a team.

Gihun sat at the upper terrace of the hotel with his mother, Junhee and her mother-in-law. He nodded and smiled at the right moment, but his head wasn’t there. He found his thoughts drifting back to Inho and his pain. When he’d gone to the secret place, he’d expected to be there earlier than Inho but when he saw him already there, shoulders slumped as he leaned over the railing, something in his heart clenched.

He didn’t feel a victory at the fact that Sangwoo had been right. He didn’t feel smug or proud of finding out a new piece of the puzzle.

All he felt was sadness for the man standing down there, looking crippled by his own sadness and worry.

Gihun didn’t hesitate before jumping over the half wall to get to him.

His hand didn’t hesitate when it went to touch his shoulder without his own brain’s consent. Like it wanted to comfort him all on its own.

But so did he anyway.

He’d tried to make his scent comforting, as understanding as he could and he thinks it worked.

At least he hopes it did.

Inho seemed to relax at his touch. His shoulders, previously tensed and strained, relaxed slightly under his touch and Gihun didn’t know why but it made him happy.

No not happy. More like glad that he could have a positive effect on him.

Because the man looked close to dying from stress. Not because it showed on his face or in his scent but because it didn’t. He keeps everything inside to the point where when something does show, it means the pain is stronger than his ability to even hide it.

He thought of Inho’s words. Quiet but haunting in their truth. Why would they need a cover up reason? Why did it still not make sense? Where is she?

And most importantly, why did Gihun have a horrible feeling something was wrong when he spoke to Sangwoo. Why did Sangwoo—the man he was sure he knew inside and out—seem like a completely different person?

He hoped it would all be resolved soon. Hoped that the feeling Sangwoo gave him wasn’t real. Hoped Inho would find his sister.

Hoped it would end.

Days kept passing without anything new happening and it was getting more and more difficultto carry on silently. Inho had forced himself to wear the black suit and start his shift yet again. He was conveniently in the main hall again, bringing orders to the tables while keeping an eye on Sangwoo.

He didn’t trust this man at all.

He was setting a drink on a table when he saw it happen.

Ali the receptionist had entered Sangwoo’s empty office with a weird looking package. Inho didn’t think much of it until when Sangwoo emerged from his office a while later, looking pale, his eyes darting around to every corner as if he was haunted. He had a small dark beige sack in hand.

It was odd to see him carrying—more like clutching tightly—such a mundane item. He walked out of his office quickly, desperate to get out of the hotel with whatever he had in hand.

Inho was already following before he knew it.

He walked after him, careful to keep his distance in the afternoon sun. He was walking along the many paths on the sides of the hotel. It was the opposite direction from Gihun’s spot. But still the pavement and the trees looked the same.

Only Inho didn’t have a certain comforting feeling like he usually did when he headed to the secret place. He felt quite the opposite.

Cold.

He watched from afar, hiding behind a tree when he saw Sangwoo halt in front of what the hotel staff called the fire box.

It was a kind of an oven you open to put any small garbage around the parks of the hotel. Quick way for the gardeners to get rid of anything.

So why was Sangwoo using it?

He watched him open it carefully before throwing the bag inside. Once he closed the door, he paused for a few seconds before turning around to leave.

Inho had to wait until he was out of sight before he left his hiding spot. He ran quickly towards the fire box, opening it carelessly.

Fearfully.

He saw a part of the sack already burning and his brain was out of the window, quickly rushing his hand through the oven like it was the most logical thing to do.

Only when he felt the biting sting of warmth, did he retract his hand and look around him carefully.

He saw a small branch on the grass and took it quickly, hoping it would be enough to save whatever Sangwoo was determined to destroy.

He managed to nudge the sack closer to him until he was able to grab it with the other hand. He examined the sack from the outside, sighing in relief that only one side of it was slightly burnt.

He quickly opened the sack despite the growing ominous feeling.

Once open, he pulled out the soft material from inside.

It was a uniform. Of a female.

A dirty dark greyish blue dress.

Only it wasn’t just dirty.

It had blood on it.

Blood on the side and on the lapels.

Inho’s stomach churned at the sight. At the implication.

His hands were trembling slightly as he turned the back of the dress inside out to see which name was sewn into it.

Inho almost dropped the dress and dropped to his knees.

It was Saebyeok’s

It was his sister’s dress.

Her blood.

Inho’s trembling hands were shaking in fear.

In anger.

He tried closing his slightly gaping mouth, but it was useless.

He was horrified.

He stood up and started walking.

Slowly.

Then faster.

He felt his hands stuffing the dress back inside the sack, now no longer shaking.

They were stiff, motionless, cold.

Like him.

He walked determinedly to the back entrance, went to his room, dropping the sack next to his bed before walking back out.

He didn’t see, didn’t feel, didn’t even hear Junho who came across him in the hall.

“Hyung?”

Inho didn’t answer, didn’t look, didn’t even listen. He just walked. Steps sure and cold in their precision.

Junho must’ve seen the deadly cold look on his face because he continued to walk after him.

“Youngil?”

Nothing

Then, a hissed and quiet,

“Inho? Where are you going? What’s going on with you?”

Still nothing.

They kept walking, well, Junho kept following until Inho reached the kitchen. Stopping for just a second to decide which of the big display of knives he should take.

Junho came to halt next to him, his eyes widening in horror as he saw Inho grip a big sharp looking kitchen knife.

A gasp.

“Inho what are you doing?!” His voice wasn’t loud, but Inho could feel the panic in it all the same.

Junho tried gripping his arm to stop him, but Inho knew how to stop him.

“Sangwoo killed my sister.” Cold. Quiet. Certain.

Sure enough, Junho’s hand dropped in shock and Inho started moving immediately.

He didn’t stop. Couldn’t.

He had a mission and nothing could stop him.

He would avenge his sister.

Inho headed to Sangwoo’s office, the knife barely hidden behind his suit jacket. He didn’t even notice that Junho had stopped following him.

It was for the best.

He entered the office only to find it empty. He huffed in frustration before looking around.

He’ll wait then.

“Gihunssi!”

Gihun stopped in the corridor, turning around quickly at Junho’s frantic voice.

“Is Ms Jang alright?!” His met him halfway worriedly.

“It’s not my mom, it’s Inho,” Junho looked terrified.

Gihun’s frown deepened.

Inho didn’t know how long he’d stood there behind the door. Waiting to strike the moment Sangwoo came in.

That fucker. He hurt his sister. He maybe even kil-

No no no… Inho couldn’t bear the thought.

Inho looked around wildly, his thoughts, his hatred too much to bear in this office. He needed to kill him. Now.

Then as if the universe listened the door finally opened and Inho quickly raised the knife.

Before he could strike, the figure entering the room turned around and shrieked in horror.

Gihun

Gihun flinched in fear, his eyes owlish and his eyebrows raised to the limit.

Inho lowered the knife immediately.

Gihun continued being in shock.

Then,

“What the FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!?!” Gihun’s gaze was thundering. Calling it a glare wasn’t enough to describe the wrath on his face. In his eyes.

Inho merely blinked, staring at Gihun dead cold.

Gihun raised a finger, pointing at his chest.

“Follow me. NOW,” he ordered and turned around quickly.

Inho hid the knife, his face still blank and followed Gihun to the familiar path.

When they reached it, Gihun turned around and began the yelling.

Inho waited for him to stop before he spoke quietly.

“Sangwoo killed my sister.” Gihun took a small step back at the words.

“I followed him and found him throwing away a uniform in the fire. Turns out it’s Saebyeok’s,” then as if delivering the finishing blow, he looked Gihun dead in the eyes and said, “it had blood on it.”

Gihun’s mouth was open wide in shock.

He remained silent and Inho sat down on the bench, staring at the ground.

After a long silence he heard a quiet but firm, “are you sure it’s blood?”

Inho looked up incredulously.

Angrily.

He stood up quickly.

“What else would it be?” His voice got louder in-spite of him. “The uniform is cut and had blood on it! And your fiancé was running to get rid of it as quickly as possible!”

He stared pointing and flailing with hands in anger. This shouldn't be a debate. The implications were all there, so why does he have to argue?

“All this and you still don’t believe it?!” Gihun could only watch him with a half concerned half angry frown on his face.

“He killed her. I don’t care who he is, I will kill him for it,” he said determinedly. He usually never used such a threatening tone, but he couldn’t help it.

Gihun’s anger won the internal battle because his glare returned.

“How do you know that this picture you created is true?” His voice was loud, not quite aggressive but stern.

“Then create another one. But one where your priority isn’t to protect your loving fiancé!” He argued back angrily and saw the moment Gihun withdrew any feeling of understanding from the equation.

“How are you talking to me this way?” He didn’t say the how dare you, but Inho heard it in his voice.

He didn’t care.

“I’m talking to you like a guy who just found his sister’s bloody clothes.”

“And my fiancé is not a murderer!” Gihun bit back just as mad.

“You said that Ali the receptionist dropped off the sack there. Then shouldn’t you suspect him rather than Sangwoo?!” He titled his head and held his hands in a gesture that almost seemed condescending. Like Inho was being dumb for not thinking that way.

“Oh, so your fiancé is innocent then? He didn’t do anything is that right?” He retorted back bitterly.

“I don’t know!” Gihun spoke loudly. “But you need to think straight! Not barge into his office with a knife. Do you think I’d let this happen?!” He gave him an incredulous glare.

“Even if you’re right, I would NEVER let you hurt my family!” He pointed an angry finger at him. His scent of daisies and jasmines was now more like a field of daisies but on fire.

“Just because I sympathised with the story of a man looking for his sister, doesn’t mean I’ll accept any of this!”

Inho only stared silently.

“I told you before and I’ll say it again. Go to the police and let them handle this. But don’t you ever dare try hurting my family!”

A beat of silence

“And try not to hurt yourself either,” his tone was still sharp and biting but just a smidge quieter.

Inho could only continue staring at Gihun’s glare as it turned almost incredulous at his own words as if he had just noticed what he had said.

“Nevermind do what you want. Just stay away from us.” The anger was back and this time Gihun didn’t wait for Inho to respond and walked away from him for the third time.

Inho watched him blankly before dropping back to the bench.

Later that evening, Gihun was standing at the upper terrace, his hands gripping the railing tightly. He was staring at the night sky, still not one star in sight. There hadn’t been any stars ever since he came back. Usually, he’d see many of them but ever since he’d returned, the sky had been carefully empty. Like him.

He stared steadily at the river in the distance. His head was still back at the secret place. Inho was so deadly calm, so determined. So sure. It made him want to doubt the man he’d known all his life. The man who loved him.

He felt like suffocating even though he was out in the open air when a hand touched his shoulder.

“I’ve missed you,” Sangwoo smiled at him tiredly.

“Well, you weren’t in your office all day,” Gihun forced a tired smile of his own.

“Yeah, I was busy dealing with the hotel’s problems,” he smiled apologetically.

“What problems?” He asked without missing a beat.

“Ah, I don’t want to talk about them now that I’m off work,” that was his way of dismissing him. Gihun narrowed his eyes slightly.

“I just want to be there for you. I don’t do anything worthwhile all day. I listen to Junhee complain about her husband and listen to Mrs Kang’s absurd stories,” he smiled but his eyes were still questioning.

“So, tell me.” He smiled sweetly, hoping that would get him a response that would ease his mind. Sangwoo looked around nervously before dismissing him again.

This time it was with sweet words.

“I love you so much, do you know that?”

Gihun blinked in surprise before looking away uncomfortably.

“But I can’t have been the only one you’ve ever loved before, right?” He didn’t know why he asked that or what he hoped to hear. That Sangwoo would admit to having been with someone, like Saebyeok or that he hadn’t.

Gihun had a feeling that even if Sangwoo denied ever having been in a relationship, he wouldn’t be able to believe him.

“I have never loved anyone else but you.”

There it was and just like he suspected, he didn’t buy it at all.

Then to deflect or maybe to get another answer or a possible slip up.

“Are you alright? You seem nervous,” Gihun asked innocently.

Sangwoo looked away for a second again before smiling tiredly.

“Just tired and missing you,” he pulled Gihun into a hug and Gihun felt cold in his arms.

He didn’t feel safe or warm or loved.

He felt worried, cold and possessed.

Inho was waiting for the lemonade to be done so that he could take it up. He stood silently staring at the ground and thought about how things have been lately. It had been three days since his attempt to attack Sangwoo. Initially, he hadn’t quite regretted his actions, but he did regret that it hurt Gihun.

Gihun

Gihun had been completely ignoring him after the whole ordeal. He’d avoided him thoroughly since. At least he thinks he is avoiding him. It’s not like he could socialize with him but still, he’d look away whenever Inho tried to catch his eyes.

Not to mention that in the last three days, Gihun hadn’t once been to the secret place. Every time he’d have a break or finish a shift, he’d go in the hope of finding Gihun there and every time he’d find it empty, leaving him disappointed.

He’d feel the disappointment in his chest and in his scent and he didn’t know what to do with it. He didn’t want to lose his most important ally. One of only two.

The ignoring definitely gave him time to think about everything.

Seeing what happened from Gihun’s point of view was definitely an eye opener after all the anger had settled down. He imagined himself being Gihun and having to deal with a stranger who almost killed his fiancé. Granted there was some evidence that explained his actions but still, not nearly enough to warrant a murder. Seeing it through this lens made him realize that what he did wasn’t right in hindsight.

But more importantly, it made him realize that Gihun must be a saint.

He hadn’t reported any of what happened and hadn’t kicked him out from the hotel either. He had every reason to. But he didn’t. He just ignored him but let him be.

And what really got to him is that Gihun must still trust him in some way because he let him stay, despite what happened, trusting him not to repeat the same mistake again.

Trusting on some level that his words and warnings were enough.

And they were.

Inho decided he wouldn’t let his emotions get the best of him again. It wasn’t his style anyway. He was more calculating than this but when he saw his sister’s name and blood, all rationality and calculation flew out of the window.

But that wouldn’t happen again.

Inho looked up as a bartender motioned for him to take the drink. Placing it on his tray, he began going upstairs.

To Gihun’s suite.

He couldn’t help but wanting to see him to clear everything up.

Well, more to apologize for everything.

The last three days have been darker than ever. He’d been left without any updates. Just his horrible thoughts and Junho’s occasional rants.

He needed to apologize to Gihun. Not because he feared any retaliation or consequences. Not even because he wanted Gihun’s help.

But because he simply wanted to.

He reached room number 4 and took a deep breath before knocking softly.

“Come in,” the voice came from inside and Inho opened the door.

The suite was large. The suites of all the family members—hell all suites—were large. A giant room that stretched elegantly with array of velvet couches, tables and dressers on every side. Gold accents were everywhere. From the wall itself to the centrepieces on every table. He took multiple steps not the room before reaching the main velvet sofas in the middle of the suite. One of which had none other than Gihun sitting on it, his robe on with a book in hand. Behind him there were multiple big windows that stared directly at the river when they weren’t covered by satin beige rosee curtains.

Gihun looked up from his book to see Inho standing awkwardly with a lemonade on his tray. Gihun looked mildly surprised to see him before looking down at his book, annoyed.

“I didn’t order a lemonade,” his voice wasn’t particularly flat but sounded disinterested, nonetheless.

Inho took a step closer, looking to his right to see a blurry half glass panel door that separated the seating area from Gihun’s bedroom. The half glass, half white double door was open and Gihun’s bed was to be seen. Beige, big and utterly luxurious.

“I know you didn’t,” he looked back at Gihun who was still pretending to be reading.

“I told them you did so I could talk to you,” he observed Gihun carefully, but the omega was determined to not show anything. Not even in his scent.

“You haven’t been to the secret place lately,” he murmured quietly and then trailed off, not knowing how to justify coming up here.

Why was this so hard.

Why was Gihun being indifferent so difficult for him to bear.

Still, turns out he’d finally said something that warranted a reaction.

Just not a good one.

“Didn’t know I was obligated to meet you there,” he finally looked up with small frown.

Shit

“Of course not. I just wanted to apologize. What I did wasn’t right at all,” he said gently.

Gihun’s frown softened slightly before looking back down at his lap.

“And you were right. Something about Ali doesn’t make sense. Junho tried to talk to him and ask about Saebyeok and he pretended not to know her. He’s definitely hiding something,” he placed the lemonade down on a near table and walked closer to Gihun. Standing about in front of Gihun’s bed in the distance.

Gihun sighed. “It was obvious from the get-go. You just wanted to find Sangwoo guilty,” he scolded firmly.

Inho looked down in embarrassment but quieted the voice that still believes Sangwoo to be guilty.

“I just want to find the truth,” he confessed quietly.

Gihun suddenly stood up and came to meet him halfway in the middle of the room.

“Me too, or I wouldn’t have let you stay till now,” he murmured just as quietly, no longer frowning or glaring or hiding his scent carefully. Just honest and vulnerable.

Inho looked at him for long seconds before breaking the fragile silence, something that has been haunting him needed to be voiced. Something he needs to hear from Gihun himself.

“But will you be fair if the truth isn’t something you will like?” His voice was small, his eyes pleading, his scent nervous and his heart beating loudly waiting for an answer that would calm him after three days of the storm.

“I would never be unfair,” he replied without missing a beat. Looking sure and determined.

Sincere

Inho’s gaze was lost in the sincerity and righteousness of his eyes. How he’d frown but not because he’s angry but because he believes whole heartedly in what he’s saying.

Inho believed him.

When you stood face to face with eyes like Gihun’s, wide and endlessly filled with understanding and compassion, you simply couldn’t do anything but believe them.

“I’m sorry for how I spoke to you last time. I’m worried sick about her,” he looked at his feet and missed the way Gihun’s big eyes softened at him. Missed the nontangible hesitance of someone who wanted to reach out but thought better of it at the last second.

“I have a feeling she’s alright,” Gihun lowered his head slightly to try to catch Inho’s downcast ones. When he did, he smiled. Small but there.

“I have a feeling we’re still missing something. Something that will lead us to her,” he nodded in assurance and Inho couldn’t help but believe him.

Because if he didn’t hold on to the gentle promise and determination of those eyes, he’d simply drown.

Seconds went by quickly as they stood staring at each other. One smiling assuringly and one staring at that smile, hoping it anchor him. Hoping it was right.

Seeing Gihun smiling at him—even if it’s a small one—made something in him loosen and soon enough he smiled back slowly, just a shadow of a smile. But one Gihun saw anyway.

It was his first smile in more than three days.

“I apologize again,” he said after what felt like hours.

Gihun pursed his lips sheepishly and nodded before looking at his feet in embarrassment or was it something else?

“Excuse me,” he murmured reluctantly and Gihun looked back offering him a small gentle smile.

An olive branch.

One he took before turning around and leaving the suite.

Gihun’s eyes remained steady at where Inho had just stood. His smile morphing into something shyer and more intimate as he stood alone, looking at the ground shyly before looking around the empty suite in embarrassment as though he was nervous someone would see him.

Even his scent became different.

Sweeter, tinged with utter relief.

He’d hated the last few days. He spent most of the time in his room and whenever he got the itch to go to his secret place, he’d stop himself.

It’s not like he couldn’t have kicked Inho out if he had seen him there, but he just didn’t want to deal with it. Didn’t want to argue with the already troubled man anymore.

A part of him also didn’t want to be the first to reach out. And Inho’s attempts to catch his eyes simply weren’t enough. He’d wanted an apology but oddly enough he found himself battling the fact that he wanted to talk to him more. To find out if anything new happened and to also check on him and see how he’s doing now.

Can’t be easy to find your sister’s clothes with blood on it. He couldn’t help but put himself in Inho’s shoes. If he had found Junhee’s blood-filled clothes that almost got burnt by someone, he too would rush to blame that person and attack them. He understood where Inho was coming from, he truly did.

Which is why he didn’t even contemplate reporting any of this.

Inho was a good man, he just knew it.

Even after the knife fiasco, he still knew it to be true. Inho could’ve groveled immediately when he got caught.

Begged him to not say anything and let him stay.

He could’ve even threatened with violence.

But no, not Inho. He waited. He took the time to think things through until he truly realized on his own that what he did wasn’t right. He didn’t come because he needed help or was fearful. He came because he was remorseful and even when he did show, he didn’t beg to stay or beg for help. He just put his feelings out there and that meant everything to him.

Because he was truthful in everything he said and did.

And it fascinated him.

He only knows people who hide their intentions and do whatever it takes to get what they want from someone. But never has he met someone who despite needing help, wouldn’t resort to anything that wasn’t authentic and true to him.

Hah, he’s literally faking his identity…

True but he was so sincere in his actions, his feelings and thoughts.

It was refreshing.

So yes, he felt relieved that they finally had cleared everything up. He felt lighter than he had the last three days. Like life had halted for three days and now was back on track.

He huffed in amusement and shook his head slightly. He was getting too invested in all of this.

Later at dinner, Gihun sat with his family as well as Mrs Kang who sat next to him. Everyone was there except for Sangwoo who had been oddly absent the whole day. Gihun looked around the hall and saw Inho serving a couple their food.

He hadn’t noticed he was staring until Mrs Kang leaned in conspiratorially. “Look at him, he will do great in his movie,” she whispered happily. Gihun almost jumped at the sudden distraction. He looked at her before looking back at the unaware Inho and failing to keep from smiling at the fact that she still saw him as Daeho.

There’s no way she actually believes this

His eyes and his careful small smile continued to be trained on Inho until Sangwoo suddenly came to stand in front of him at their table, looking nervous but trying to hide it with a usual smile.

Gihun’s smile dropped slightly.

“Hey, I’m heading to meet Park Gyeongseok. He’s back from New York. Would you like to accompany me?” He stared at Gihun expectantly with curt smile.

Gihun found his eyes looking absentmindedly behind Sangwoo before looking back at him.

“No, you go. I’ll see him the next time you visit,” he smiled and hoped that Sangwoo wouldn’t insist like he always did.

“Of course, no problem. I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a good night, everyone,” he said, his eyes darting to everyone politely before leaving straightaway.

Odd

He usually liked to argue more until Gihun relented or until he was sure Gihun wouldn’t budge. Gihun watched him go before instinctively looking back towards Inho.

Inho was watching him go too, his face a blank canvas. A complete mystery to him.

Inho walked to his newly appointed manager and talked to him for a brief moment before returning to his work.

Seems like the manager didn’t allow Inho to go for a quick break.

Gihun couldn’t help the quiet sigh of relief. He would’ve only been worried about Inho if he left.

The next morning, Inho was serving a guest near the lobby when a man wearing a Trenchcoat came in with an assistant trailing behind him. The man approached him, grunting a quiet hello.

“Could you get Madame Seong and manager Cho Sangwoo to come to his office. Tell them it’s detective Park Jungbae.”

Inho kept his face neutral and nodded before leading him to the office.

He told another colleague to get to Madame Seong while he went to find the devil himself.

Why was a detective here?

Inho made sure to be the one to bring in the coffee for the detective and his assistant whose name is apparently Daeho. He hoped getting them the drinks into the room would give him a chance to find out what would bring police here.

Soon enough, he entered the room, careful to be as slow as possible while placing the coffee. Luckily for him, the cop didn’t mind him being there and spoke freely.

“I will have to investigate your staff. Maybe someone knew Ali Abdul and could help us find out whether he had any known enemies who’d want to kill him in the night like that.”

Kill him?

Ali is dead?

Inho kept his face completely empty before leaving the room quietly.

Ali the receptionist was murdered.

Chapter Text

He walked quickly to where Gihun sat with his sister and her husband in the veranda. He stopped walking when he was close enough to catch his eyes.

Gihun who’d been smiling, noticed Inho’s gaze and immediately knew something had happened. His smile dropped as he excused himself and went to the familiar stairs, knowing Inho would follow him soon.

He knew it would take a bit since Inho couldn’t follow him right away.

Gihun leaned against the railing that stretched over half of the lowest floor, preferring to stand there and lean on something instead of standing in front of the part without a railing. He had a feeling he’d need something to lean on. He waited anxiously until Inho came down the stairs quickly and jumped over to the lowest floor.

Gihun froze at the sight.

Woah

His jump was very quick and precise. He’d bent his knees, crouching and braced one hand on the floor before jumping over the half wall quickly.

He did all that in the span of seconds.

It was a bit mesmerizing

So very attractive…

Wait what?

“Ali was murdered last night.”

Wait what???

He’d apparently said that part out loud because Inho only nodded absentmindedly while looking around thoughtfully. His scent was cloud of hazy frustration and confusion.

“I found out he was murdered last night after his shift. The detective wants to question everyone,” he wiped a hand over his face, rubbing his eyes roughly.

Gihun still looked frozen in surprise.

“May I smoke?” Inho looked at him tiredly.

Gihun blinked.

“Of course,” he leaned back against the railing in shock.

“I hadn’t told you this yet, but I heard Ali on the phone yesterday. He was threatening someone, telling them to bring a million won to the dock at 8 pm or he’d expose their secret.” Inho lit his cigarette, stressed while Gihun looked even more surprised.

“He was blackmailing someone?” He sounded a bit incredulous. Ali was always so kind. He never imagined the beta to be anything but a gentleman…

“Seems like it,” he took a quick drag before looking at Gihun with slightly narrowed eyes. “Sangwoo left the hotel at half past 7 with a suitcase. You saw him leave too,” he said it matter of factly instead of accusingly.

Gihun’s wide eyes looked at Inho and shook his head slowly. “He was visiting a friend. He asked me to come with him, but I refused and then he called me from there a while later and I even spoke to my friend. Couldn’t have been him,” he explained calmly and watched Inho nod carefully.

Inho took another drag before calmly looking back at him. “Do you still think they have nothing to do with one another?”

He asked out of curiosity instead of anger or confusion. He respected Gihun’s opinion and wouldn’t try to make him get to conclusions he can reach on his own. He wasn’t here to ruin a relationship. Even if it’s one he didn’t think was good to begin with.

“No they are but…he was so normal when he came back. He came back late and stopped by my room, and he was completely fine. He couldn’t have just murdered Ali and been so normal about it,” he looked at Inho almost pleadingly, like he was willing him to confirm that no normal person could be this cold.

That Sangwoo couldn’t be this person.

His scent was turning sour with worry and something worse, doubt.

It made Inho’s nose twitch.

He didn’t like this scent at all.

He doesn’t want to worry Gihun like this. But what can he do…

He calmed down his own scent, willing it to be comforting instead of frustrated and soon enough he felt Gihun’s tense shoulders relax slightly before his scent calmed down to something simmering instead.

“Anyway, the secrets were with Ali,” he said calmly, giving Gihun another out from discussing Sangwoo and his role in all of this.

He wouldn’t do that with Junho, but he found himself more careful around Gihun. Not because of fear or because of lack of trust.

But because he didn’t want to upset him. Upsetting the omega was something he never wanted to do.

Never.

Gihun nodded with a slight frown. “Maybe his house could have the answers.”

True, unlike most of the staff, Ali was a local and had his own cottage like house somewhere downtown.

Inho nodded, knowing where to head too next.

“I’ll need to get the address somehow.”

“What were you thinking? Leading the police here to investigate the very man who threatened us?” Sangwoo sighed in frustration before looking up.

“Madame Seong, I-”

“Shh. Why did you not inform me prior? How could you not tell me he was blackmailing you? I thought you had handled this entire issue. In return I made you the general manager as well as my son’s fiancé. Was my faith in you misplaced?” She looked at him coldly.

Sangwoo swallowed, looking at the hardened woman sitting on the opposite sofa in front of him.

“I assure you I had it under control. I still do. There are many witnesses who can confirm that I was no where near the crime scene. I even called Gihun-”

“Don’t you dare bring my son into this,” she said with deadly calmness.

“Madame Seong I would never put Gihun in a dangerous position. You know that.” He was a bit defensive at the accusation of involving Gihun. No one could ever fear for Gihun’s safety more than him.

“The important thing is for this case to be closed. That detective, Park Jungbae always wins his cases. We need to shut him down,” she looked at him grimly.

He looked away. “I can’t believe it was just Ali behind this. How did he know-”

“I don’t care. Fix it,” she looked at him warningly and he nodded before a knock came at the door.

“Come in,” she ordered calmly, relaxing her stance as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

Sangwoo, whose face had gone from slight panic to complete indifference paled slightly when none other than Kang Noeul came in.

“Madame, I wish to speak to you,” she looked at Sangwoo blankly before looking at the lady.

“Not now, I’ll call on you later.”

She nodded, looking at Sangwoo one last time before leaving.

What the hell is she still doing here?

He’d heard Ms. Jang wanted to fire her for being pregnant.

He knew it was his.

He just hadn’t cared. He’d told Noeul off when she told him about it. Told her it wasn’t his problem and that it wasn’t even his.

He thought she’d just get fired and that’s that.

But now she’s talking to Madame Seong like they’re acquaintances?

“What would she want from you madame?” He couldn’t help but say it out loud.

Madame Seong looked at him exasperatedly. “Focus on the problem you got yourself into.”

Inho walked to his room to change into his casual clothes. Gihun had managed to sneak into Sangwoo’s office and find out where Ali had lived. He’d written down the address for him on a small piece of paper and discreetly passed it along.

Inho was putting on his coat when Junho wandered into the room, sighing loudly.

“I’m so tired,” he complained as he threw himself down on his bed.

“What, did you fight with your mom again? Or was it Kang Noeul this time?” He asked drily. He was getting used to Junho entering their room and ranting about anything. As much as he pretended to be annoyed by the rants, he couldn’t help but admit that he secretly loved those very rants. They pulled him back into life when living was too tough sometimes. When his mind echoes with images of a burnt dress or a faded sentence.

“Both,” Junho looked at him miserably. Bracing his hands against the mattress, he started ranting about his drama once again for the one hundredth time.

“Mom is treating Noeul like crap. She keeps giving her difficult tasks on purpose just to watch her suffer. It became so bad to the point where Noeul came to me, yelling at me to tell my mom the truth and to leave her alone,” he clenched his eyes shut as if recounting everything was causing him a headache.

Inho can relate to that, because he too gets a headache when he listens to Junho talk about this. Still, he smiled subtly.

“And will you?” He asked curiously as he put the piece of paper in his pocket.

“No, I’m determined to make this work. It will take time that’s all. Noeul will calm down soon enough.”

Inho stared at him with his head tilted to the side and wondered how someone could be this dumb.

This ridiculous, good-hearted man was truly one of a kind and Inho couldn’t help but huff a quiet amused chuckle and give him a quick pat on the shoulder.

“I’ll go to Ali’s house and won’t be too long. Hang in there buddy. You got this,” he smirked at Junho’s narrowed eyes.

So he did catch the sarcasm.

He smirked wider before leaving. However, the moment he left the room, his smile left too.

His smiles were only ever reserved for one person before he came here.

Saebyeok

But now, in-spite of him, he found it reserved for three.

One, who’s he’s worried sick about and wishes he were with her. The one who has always been his only family.

One, he’s slowly loving to make fun of and listen to. The one he’s beginning to trust wholeheartedly and consider him as his younger brother.

And finally, one who comforts him silently like no other. The one he’s growing more and more fond of.

Inho found the small house quickly enough. He looked around, careful not to be seen hanging around a dead man’s house. He tried knocking but no one answered the door. When he tried pushing the door open, it was surprisingly unlocked.

He stepped into the empty house, looking around everywhere. It was a simple house, wooden furniture, empty drawers and clean dishes. The scents were oddly sterilized, like someone made sure that no scent could be traced back.

Inho kept opening every closet or drawer until he reached a wooden chest on the floor.

He opened it and found a dress.

Weird

Ali wasn’t married.

Inho started going through the chest but froze the moment he saw an image of his younger self staring back. He was standing next to a younger Saebyeok. Both smiling without a care in the world.

One rare picture from their distant past lives. One of their very few ones.

One his sister always kept with her.

He held the small picture in one hand and began going through the rest of the chest in a slight panic.

He found a familiar golden necklace. It was simple with only one blue amazonite stone.

But it was hers.

He’d bought her that necklace for her birthday years ago. She’d wished she had something valuable of her own and Inho had saved up for a long time just so he could surprise her. See that’s why he never believed that his sister would steal a diamond necklace. She’d never considered turning her eyes towards the guests’s possessions but had instead just wished for something that belonged to her.

She hadn’t even really meant it at the time—just a small quiet joke at the time—, but he took it seriously and did everything to get it for her. It had been worth it; her happiness had been worth it.

She was worth it.

Inho held the picture with one hand and the necklace in the other. His chest was heaving slightly.

In worry, in sadness, in panic, in longing.

When he slowly stood up, he was swallowing down the tears threatening to fall and the lump in his throat that made it too hard to breathe.

But before he could turn to leave, a loud thud echoed through the house, and he felt sudden pain in his head.

Pain?

He didn’t notice a thing as he collapsed to the floor, falling unconscious.

The family was having lunch, his mother talking about how the detective better close the case soon while Myunggi assured her he’d ask his powerful father to intervene before it could ruin the hotel’s reputation.

Gihun was barely paying attention. They were all eating, except for him. He had his head leaning carefully on one hand, his other one gripping the fork, absentmindedly pushing around the rice on his plate. His gaze was trained on his food, but he wasn’t focused on it at all. His focus was somewhere else entirely.

It was wherever Inho was.

Where is he?

Sangwoo finished his work in the office, heading to stand next to him.

“I will ask them to organize a candlelight dinner for us tonight,” he smiled down at Gihun who for the first time wasn’t even attempting to smile back. He just looked up at the man standing next to him. The man he thought he knew. His head tilted slightly, and his eyes were a bit narrowed as he stared at Sangwoo, wondering if he was truly that capable of lying.

“I know how much you love a full moon, so it should be a beautiful night.”

Gihun couldn’t help but smile at that. He was weak after all. “How do you remember these things? I was a kid when I loved that,” and boy wouldn’t he understand his second meaning with this sentence. It pretty much sums their relationship up.

“I remember everything you ever tell me,” He smiled gently as he sat down next to him and Gihun’s smile widened for a moment before looking back at his plate in embarrassment.

And slight discomfort.

How can he make such plans the same day their receptionist was murdered?

“9 at the upper terrace, okay?”

Shit he hadn’t paid attention…

“Sure.” There was his trained smile again. The one that was becoming more and more difficult to fake.

He found it harder to focus on Sangwoo’s words because all he could think about was why Inho was so late?

He should’ve returned by now.

He couldn’t stop his head from zoning out nor could he stop his eyes from wandering across the main hall. As if to scan for the familiar looking dark brown hair. That presence that he was getting used to.

Nothing. No sign of him.

Gihun looked back down at his plate and thought the same thing over and over again.

Where are you Inho?

Everything had gone dark. But it was slowly coming back to him.

He started regaining his consciousness. Feeling the pain of a horrible headache slowly dawn on him. He groaned in pain as one hand went to his head, opening his eyes blearily. He should’ve been alarmed by the fact that someone hit him in the head.

But currently he was alarmed that the freaking detective from the morning sat crouching next to him, with a smile of a predator catching his prey.

“Youngil was it? Come come,” he hoisted him up slightly into a seating position. He was barely aware that the house was full of police officers now, swarming the place and taking everything apart.

Inho clenched his eyes shut in pain, a dull thudding in his head. One hand—that was still holding his sister’s necklace tightly—went instinctively to the back of his head and rubbed it carefully, wincing at the new ways he felt the sudden pain.

“So would you like to start here or at the precinct?” He smiled again and waited for Inho to open his eyes.

 Shit

“Youngil. You better start talking. You must know by now how bad this looks on your end. When I questioned you earlier today, you said you didn’t know Ali at all and yet there you were in his house hours later, unconscious no less.” The detective was staring at him intently, with the same small smirk on his face. A smirk that told Inho he wouldn’t accept anything but the truth. Or else, he’d carry this murder.

Inho was still slightly squinting at the man, his eyes still adjusting to the light of the man’s office. His head was exploding.

He took a deep breath and realized it was time to involve the police in all of this. Before he could begin to explain, the detective spoke up again.

“So, start with the girl in the picture. She’s wearing the same necklace that you were holding. That the girl you two are fighting over?” He spoke calmly; his head tilted in curiosity.

“No. She’s- she is my sister,” he swallowed after saying the word.

The detective raised one brow in intrigue. Like he was finally getting somewhere.

Boy wasn’t he ready for what he’s about to hear…

“My name isn’t Oh Youngil. It’s Hwang Inho. My sister is Hwang Saebyeok. She worked at the Grand hotel for more 6 years, but she went missing six months ago after getting fired for stealing.”

Detective Park Jungbae sat back in his chair with a frown. No longer smiling.

“I haven’t heard of any theft at the Grand,” he said distrustfully.

Huh…of all the things Inho expected him to say, that certainly wasn’t it.

Maybe that’s a good sign after all.

“That’s because she didn’t steal sir. I spoke to the lady she supposedly stole from, and she told me nothing was ever stolen. They framed her for something she didn’t do. She used to send me letters regularly but then she stopped. So, I came here to find her and pretended to be Oh Youngil. I found out that Ali the receptionist was close to her. That’s why I went to his house to look for any clues to find her.”

Detective Park’s narrowed eyes kept assessing him sharply.

“Why did it take you so long to come here and look for her. Why didn’t you involve the police sooner?”

Shit

Inho had an answer for that but one he couldn’t tell the detective, so without missing a beat or showing any sign of hesitation, he continued.

“Truthfully, I didn’t think involving the police would help. The person who fired her is madame Soeng after all,” Inho looked at him pointedly. He gathered through the morning interaction that detective Park and madame Seong didn’t tolerate each other. So it wasn’t that difficult to use it as a cover for something he couldn’t admit to anyone yet.

It worked.

“There are rules Inho. The law is above all. Madame Soeng included. Instead, you just went and took up a false identity to play detective,” he glared at Inho, but Inho knew the anger wasn’t directed at him but rather at the thought of the Seongs being untouchable.

Then the telephone next to the detective rang. He watched him answer it and saw his face transform from a tired frown into immediate attention and then into something dark.

“But sir, this is an important case. Of course not sir. I- …as you wish.”

Inho wasn’t stupid. He knew that right now his exact point was proven to be true. The Seongs were untouchable after all.

The detective sighed in frustration, wiping a hand across his face roughly and looked at him miserably. As if he hated that Inho’s words were true.

Inho looked at him carefully, wondering if he should reveal another thing that could help him after all. Maybe not with Ali’s case. But perhaps with Saebyeok’s.

“There is one other thing of hers that I found.”

Gihun checked himself in the mirror for the one hundredth time. His dark beige velvet suit was elegant, too elegant even. Sangwoo had insisted he dresses up for the occasion. As if they weren’t just dining in the hotel anyway. The suit had faint gold accents or maybe it was the reflection of the light that made it seem shiny.

His curls were styled, not one hair out of place. He’d spent the last hour taking care of his appearance. But not because he cared about the dinner, but because if he didn’t focus on something he’d eventually go insane.

Inho still wasn’t back.

Gihun was extremely worried about him at this point. He’d left in the early afternoon and now it was nighttime. How long could it have taken to go through Ali’s house. Can’t have been longer than an hour.

He should be here by now.

Gihun’s worry manifested itself in small ways at first. For instance, helping Junhee with ridiculous things or ordering stuff only not to drink them from stress.

Then it got worse. He kept circling back to the main hall like an idiot wondering if Inho was already back and simply hadn’t reached out. Each time he went to check in the main hall, he wrestled with the fact that Inho was perhaps back and simply didn’t think of checking in with him. He hated that possibility. He’d even begin to feel a glimmer of irrational anger at the alpha for not thinking to come to him immediately when he was back.

But every time he went and didn’t find a trace of him, something in his chest clenched tightly and then he’d wish Inho had been there after all and had simply forgotten to come to him. Because what’s worse than being forgotten by Inho is Inho not being there at all.

The more time went by the stronger the weight in his lungs became. It was suffocating and heavy. It found itself in his lungs and ribs up to his throat. It felt like someone was choking him and he couldn’t breathe properly.

That’s how worried he is.

He feels responsible for Inho being possibly in danger. He’d given him the address after all. That’s why he was so worried. If anything were to happen to Inho, it would be on him.

Finally, the last stage consisted of him pacing around his room like a madman, wondering if Inho was hurt or needed him.

That’s why he had decided to stop and take care of something else before he went out there and started looking for him himself.

As he stared at the mirror, he looked himself in the eyes, seeing the worried frown and became not just concerned for Inho, but also for himself.

Because what concerned him wasn’t just the fact that he was worried about the alpha’s well being. It was the unexpected realization that he…

He missed him.

He misses Inho.

He hadn’t realized how he came to expect and even depend on his presence by now. It had only been two weeks since he’d met him, but the presence of Hwang Inho was something one simply couldn’t forget or stop noticing.

He didn’t impose or force his presence on anyone. Although he had a strong scent and a stare that could intimidate many, he gave off a completely different feeling to him. To him, Inho’s presence was quite the opposite, his presence was quiet but always constant.

Careful but warm and comforting in the distance. Gihun only now realized that whenever he was in the main hall or even the veranda, he’d always subconsciously count on Inho being there. Even if they didn’t speak, they didn’t have to. Just him being there was enough.

One quick glance was enough. His faint scent as he passed by was enough.

It comforted him whenever he needed it. It anchored him when people’s words were too much.

He stared at his reflection again.

When had he started noticing Hwang Inho in every room? Was it something new or was he always aware of him?

Probably from the beginning, for Inho was difficult not to notice.

He was always so focused and confident but when their eyes would meet, he’d see him. The real him.

It comforted him to no end because Inho was also pretending every second of every day. Just like him.

He felt like Inho was the person he could be himself with. He didn’t know why.

Was it because Inho was trustworthy?

Was it his comforting scent that managed to calm him down with one single breath?

Was it the secret place that oversaw their meetings that made it easier to trust and let down his guard?

Was it his small smile that Gihun sometimes felt would form just for him? Or perhaps his eyes that had intrigued him with their haunted depth and a look that he felt he could never lie to?

Or was it the fact that it went both ways. Inho could only be himself with him and Junho. Maybe that’s why it was easier to show oneself when the other person was meeting him halfway.

He shook his head quickly.

He was spiralling because Inho simply wasn’t back yet. He had to head towards the terrace now. He closed the door behind him and saw Junho approach him with a tray with tea.

“Gihunssi, Hyunju said you wanted tea,” Junho smiled at him, but Gihun could see the strain of it.

“I don’t want tea,” he blurted out sheepishly and Junho tilted his slightly.

“She said you wanted me to bring you tea-”

“Yes, I ordered it, but I don’t really want it. I just wanted you to come upstairs. I-”

Junho was trying not to frown at him but was failing at hiding his confusion.

Gihun’s wide eyes and guilty look deflated into worry, like a ballon. Like something he had been trying to hide for too long was suddenly too strong not to show.

“Where is he? How is he not back yet. I’m worried about him,” he whispered shakily. His hands clenched in fists to try and calm himself down and not start gesturing around like lunatic.

Junho’s confusion was replaced with sudden understanding.

“I don’t know, I’m very worried too,” Junho was frowning sadly just like him. Allowing himself to just show his worry to the one person who’d get it.

Exactly how Gihun was feeling.

“So, what should we do?” His worried frown deepened. He needed to be given instructions at this point before he did something stupid.

“Gihunssi, you go to dinner. I’ll finish my shift soon. If he’s not back by then, I’ll go and look for him,” he nodded in question and Gihun nodded back but stopped him before he could leave.

“Wait,” he looked around contemplating before getting an idea. “If he’s back, tell me. I need to know that he’s fine-” Gihun was rambling while looking at the door next to him, missing the questioning look Junho shot him. “Tell you what, if he’s back, come up to the table and say anything. Tell me anything at all. I’ll get it,” he raised his eyebrows in question and finally noticed Junho’s slightly confused stare.

Gihun felt subconscious. Junho must be confused about why he cared this much.

That makes two of them.

Gihun looked down and swallowed before trying to justify himself. “You know him, something could’ve happened, and he could be in trouble,” he shrugged his shoulder as casually as he could.

He probably thought he looked casual, but his wide eyes, still worried frown and hesitant quiet voice said anything but that.

Junho only nodded in agreement before leaving.

Gihun took a deep breath before turning to the other direction.

Hopefully Inho would be back soon.

“You keep looking better and better,” Sangwoo pushed his chair forward after he sat down. The terrace looked lovely. It was a private corner that almost looked independent from the rest of the terrace. A beautiful table had been set for them with a small gleaming lamp in the middle.

Looking to his right he could see the river, absolutely still this night, the boats parked in the distance not even moving due to the lack of current. Sure enough though, it was a full moon.

But although the moon was big and beautiful, Gihun noticed the continued lack of stars. Even the moon wasn’t shiny. Like the sky simply refused to light up. He was searching for any trace of any star without luck when Sangwoo sat down.

Gihun abandoned his search for a star and looked back at the table. He saw a single violet carnation flower in a small glass vase placed in front of him. He huffed in amusement.

“I used to love carnations as a kid. Junhee would always make fun of me for it, saying it’s flower of the dead,” he smiled at Sangwoo who only smiled back.

“If you love it, then it must be the most beautiful flower out there,” he said, looking in his eyes unwaveringly causing Gihun to look away at his lap.

Guess Sangwoo missed the part where he said that he used to love it. He didn’t have a favorite flower anymore. Not even the tulips he got when he came back are his favorites.

Typical

Sangwoo liked to stay in the past.

“You know, since I’ve returned, I’ve told you about everything I’ve ever experienced in London. By now you know everything as though you’d been there with me,” he glanced up at Sangwoo with smile. “But I don’t know anything about how your life has been those last 3 years and every time I ask you about it, you give me sweet words,” he widened his smile so that Sangwoo doesn’t see it as an attack.

So he doesn’t hear the suspicion in his words.

But Sangwoo hears it. Just not quite the same suspicion Gihun felt.

“You’re asking the same question from before, only in a different way, right?” He smiled knowingly as he raised his wine glass to take a sip.

Or buy time.

“I just can’t believe that you didn’t have any other relationship all this time,” he made sure to smile. To pass it off as something small.

Not a did you have a have thing with a former employee and also did you kill her?

“I didn’t say that. I just said I never loved anyone but you,” he smiled before looking away in embarrassment. “But of course, there were some meaningless flings,” he looked up and smiled sheepishly.

Gihun smiled back despite the disgust bubbling in his stomach. His usual big eyes were narrowed slightly as he watched Sangwoo being shy.

Shy

Gihun wanted to laugh or possibly cry.

And because he was completely done with this day and because he was still worried sick about Inho, he decided to ruin this entire dinner.

“Who do you think killed Ali?” Gihun was simply too curious about what he had to say and maybe a part of him hoped that if Sangwoo’s mood was spoiled that he could leave this dinner and try to find Inho.

Sangwoo who was chuckling, froze suddenly before drinking carefully.

Definitely buying time.

“Gihun is it me or is something weird here?” His face was no longer relaxed or smiling. In fact, he looked dead serious.

“What’s weird?” He didn’t miss a beat. Raising an eyebrow as his eyes narrowed further.

“You seem more interested in the servants than in us,” he said just as quickly.

“In fact, you find any excuse to not talk about us, and you haven’t once told me that you loved me back ever since you returned.”

At that Gihun looked away. He knew that he hadn’t told Sangwoo those three words he’d been longing to hear.

He hoped Sangwoo knew that he longed to say them too. He longed to mean them.

But a force beyond him stopped from ever saying it back. Something in him didn’t want to ever say those words unless he was sure he meant them with his whole heart and unfortunately with Sangwoo he hadn’t felt it yet. Not the way he wants to, not all the way.

He knew he wasn’t being fair to his fiancé but lately it was hard to see Sangwoo as his fiancé and not the man who is entangled with serious trouble. So, no he wouldn’t apologize and hide behind empty sweet words.

Because he wasn’t here to be blamed. He wouldn’t sit there if Sangwoo wants to switch this blame game back on him.

Two can play this game.

“Oh, ever since I returned? You’ve been carrying this with you since then? I didn’t know you kept count.” He knew it was petty and spiteful, but he’d do it to get out of this topic just like Sangwoo did when he wanted to get out of the topic of discussing anything that is remotely serious and may involve his past.

Seems to work because Sangwoo looks like a fish out of water, taken off guard by the switch of blame. He drinks another sip.

Buying more time. But Gihun wouldn’t wait for an answer, he’ll continue.

“And I told you many times. I don’t see them as ‘servants.’ If anything happens to one of them, it’s like something happened to my family. I have always been like this. I haven’t changed.”

“But I did?”

“I don’t know, maybe you did or maybe you didn’t. That’s why I’m asking you questions. To find out more from you,” his voice grew a bit louder, but he couldn’t stop himself. He was getting tired from Sangwoo running form his questions.

“But then why do I feel like you’re interrogating me?” He leaned forward, his eye glistening in the light for the warm lamp.

“Well, if you haven’t done anything wrong, then you shouldn’t be bothered by an interrogation,” he raised one eyebrow and leaned back. He hadn’t noticed that he was leaned forward from his anger.

“No, what bothers me is that you don’t seem to be happy that we’re getting married soon. Gihun did you fall in love with someone else?” Sangwoo’s voice cracked slightly.

Gihun looked at him in disbelief. His head turned to the river for a few seconds before looking back at him. “I can’t believe you asked me that,” he shook his head at the absurdity.

“No, I can’t believe I hadn’t yet. Did you meet someone in London? He inched closer and tilted his head, making his glistening eyes shine brighter.

Gihun closed his slightly open mouth and turned his gaze away from the river. “If I had fallen in love with someone else, would I ever agree to marry you?

This got Sangwoo to freeze, to stop. To look down in shame. As if he just realized what he had said and to whom.

“I’m sorry. I- I’ve been stressed too lately and today was tough,” he said followed by another sip.

Gihun took a small breath, like he survived a battle but at the same time, the feeling of annoyance stayed with him.

“And you can ask me anything you want. Because I want you to understand me better than anyone,” he said with his shiny eyes staring at him earnestly, but Gihun only found his eyes going back to the river.

To the secret place in that direction.

They fell silent after that moment passed, eating and going back to superficial small talk. The tension in the air hadn’t dissolved though. It carried along with them even when they went back inside to drop Gihun off to his suite.

Still no Inho in sight. Junho hadn’t given him a message either. Gihun was going to lose his mind.

They finally reached his suite. Gihun stood by the door and Sangwoo came to stand in front of him.

“I have an idea. I will travel to a city up north for some business on Thursday. I’ll stay there a night. How about you come with me?” Gihun’s eyes darted up to look at Sangwoo instead of the ground but the moment he had raised his head, he saw him.

Inho was standing at the end of the hallway, half hiding behind the corner.

Gihun froze, his eyes lingering on Inho for a few long seconds before looking at Sangwoo.

His surprise from seeing Inho kept him silent to the point that Sangwoo raised his eyebrows in question. “Is the idea that bad?”

Shit he was distracted.

“No, no. I just- I’m not sure if I have things to do on Thursday. Mom might obj-”

“No, leave your mother on me. You haven’t left the hotel since you’ve been back, you must be bored.” He smiled gently but his words didn’t give room for any arguments.

Gihun smiled back and nodded in agreement.

He didn’t want to go, but he wanted Sangwoo gone more right now.

So he can talk to the disappearing man over there.

“Great, then I’ll let you sleep and will prepare everything tomorrow.” He smiled widely and leaned in to kiss him.

Oh, he was going to be sick.

Gihun forced himself not to turn his head away or give him his cheek and let Sangwoo kiss him. It was their first kiss in a very long time.

The first thing he felt was that Sangwoo’s lips were drier than he remembered. When they met his, it didn’t feel like the heartfelt reunion it should’ve been. It wasn’t the kiss that was filled with longing or even memory. It felt new but dim and empty. Its touch against his lips was faint and left no impact.

No spark.

Thankfully, it was just quick kiss. One that made Gihun question many things while it made Sangwoo question less.

When he leaned back, he smiled gently, his happiness over the moon while Gihun tried to match him.

“Good night,” he whispered before leaving him in the empty hallway.

When Gihun watched him leave the hallway, he looked back quickly towards where Inho stood, only now it was empty again.

Gihun’s stomach dropped. Inho had seen this.

He didn’t know why it bothered him that Inho had to see this. But it did.

So he didn’t hesitate and went to follow the alpha down the same hallway.

They needed to talk anyway, and he better explain where he’d disappeared off too.

He went down the stairs to find the main hall almost empty. The only people left at midnight were Mrs Kang who was drinking alone at her table, Junho who looked close to passing out as he stood close to her table in case she needed a refill and a man playing the piano in the corner close to them. He was playing the music of ‘my foolish heart.’

Gihun approached Junho with a small smile, who immediately straightened up when he saw him.

“Inho is back. I was going to go upstairs to tell you, but he said he’d go find you himself,” he whispered carefully.

Well now Gihun wishes he hadn’t…

“Yeah, I saw him, but we couldn’t talk. Where is he? What happened?”

“I don’t know yet sir, but I will go downstairs and find out. Excuse me,” he bowed politely with a smile. Gihun smiled back and watched him go.

Oh crap

He needs to go before-

“Ah, Gihun. Come here,” Mrs Kang beckoned him over.

Too late.

He went to sit down next to her with a friendly smile on his face. He liked Mrs Kang, truly. Just not this late in the night. Not when he would much rather talk to a certain alpha.

“Staying up late tonight,” he smiled at her.

“Yes, yes. But I’m staying up late on my own while you’re staying up late your love,” she smirked at Gihun who couldn’t help but chuckle in amusement and look away in embarrassment—and something else—because currently he wasn’t staying up late for Sangwoo no.

He was staying up late for Inho.

“Why does he actually invite you for dinner in your own hotel? Is he greedy? He better not be,” Mrs Kang looked at him seriously and Gihun couldn’t help but chuckle again.

Mrs Kang was truly one of a kind.

Then, the new manager of the male staff—a mysterious but charming middle-aged man called Park Heesoon—came up to them to ask whether Gihun would like a drink.

Gihun declined politely before looking back at Mrs Kang. But she wasn’t looking at him. Her gaze was trained on Mr Park who walked away.

“He loved her, you know,” she said cryptically.

Gihun gave her a confused smile, “who?”

“Him,” she tilted her head in the direction of where Park Heesoon stood silently.

Gihun raised his eyebrows in surprise before looking back at Mrs Kang.

“And who was the ‘she’?” He asked curiously, tilting his head slightly.

“She was noble woman with very rich parents. The most beautiful woman back then. We were vacationing, my late husband and I when we met her. She was about to get engaged to the son of her father’s business partner,” Gihun found this story very captivating already, his chin leaning on his hand as he paid attention to Mrs Kang.

“But then he came along and changed everything. They fell deeply in love just like in the movies.”

Gihun raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Mr Park? And? Did her parents agree to their relationship?”

Mrs Kang scoffed at the thought.

“Of course not. They didn’t, neither did her friends. You see, they all thought it’s just a summer fling. He was working at a restaurant at the time and whenever his shift was over, he’d go meet her at their spot. They’d disappear all night long and only show up the next morning.”

Gihun was completely fascinated.

To have a love like this must have been magical.

To fall in love in spite of society and class.

To break all barriers and be content with the simple feeling of loving and being loved back.

To meet at a secret special place where they can disappear without being found.

Why does that sound familiar to his heart?

“But then summer was over,” she said after taking a drag from her cigar.

Gihun leaned forward excitedly.

“Was the adventure over then?” He looked at her with child like anticipation.

She chuckled at his excitement.

“No, it only just began then,” she smirked as she saw Gihun smile widely.

“What happened?” His eyes were owlishly wide, hoping this little story had a happy ending.

“It was time for her family to leave. But when they looked for her, she was no where to be found,” she leaned in and whispered, “they had run away together and even got married.”

Gihun’s mouth opened slightly but the corners of his mouth twitched upwards nonetheless.

“Her parents disowned her for it, but they didn’t care. Life went on.”

“And then?!” He asked excitedly, his shoulders shaking in passion as he spoke.

She looked at him and huffed in faux exasperation.

“That’s it, that’s the end,” she said smiling wistfully.

Gihun leaned back in his chair. A dumb smile on his face.

“It really is like in the movies,” he said dreamily before sighing. “She was very brave for standing up to her parents. For challenging everyone for the man she loved,” he didn’t know why his voice was just full of admiration but also sadness.

A part of him wishes to always be as brave as that woman. To fight for love like this when he finds it. He was past the point of pretending like he had found it with Sangwoo. Especially after tonight’s dinner.

“You know, some saw her as brave. Others considered her crazy.”

Gihun looked at Mrs Kang with a small unsure smile.

“And you?” He didn’t know why his heart was beating quickly as he waited for her answer.

“I considered her to be in love,” she smiled softly.

Gihun matched her smile and felt a foreign feeling in his chest. A feeling of warmth.

Something fearless and beautiful.

He looked away with the same wide stupid smile on his face and eventually left with the same smile after wishing Mrs Kang a good night. When he went up to his room, he stood in front of the mirror, seeing his stupid lovesick smile for the very first time.

He wished to have a love like that. A love that made him want to do crazy things, make him brave. What a lovely feeling it must be. His smile was dreamy but what made a part of his smile intimate and all too knowing is that as he listened to Mrs Kang describe the romance, some feelings didn’t feel that foreign. Not as foreign and new as he expected them to be.

When she described them meeting at a place where only the sun can find them, it didn’t feel foreign or absurd.

It felt relatable. Familiar.

When she spoke of class differences and meeting after shifts, he couldn’t—truly couldn’t—stop his foolish heart from thinking of a certain someone.

He couldn’t stop himself from imagining himself in Mr Park’s story. Only not with Sangwoo, but with-

He shook his head quickly, the smile still not leaving his face. He was too tired that’s all.

But when went to look at the sky through the window,

He finally saw stars.

The stars were suddenly everywhere, shining brighter than ever before and Gihun could only smile as he finally found them. They’d been waiting for him to open his heart. To look beyond the ever-constant moon and now that he has found them, he wouldn’t stop smiling.

He was waiting for Inho the next morning at the secret place. He decided to jump to the lowest floor and sit by the part without a railing, letting his feet dangle close to the water of the river underneath. It was a sunny morning and Gihun leaned his hands on the ground next to him, stretching his back slightly and relaxing.

Soon enough, Inho showed up in a white dress-shirt. He jumped over to him quickly and Gihun couldn’t help letting his eyes follow the jump attentively. It was just so satisfying and honestly attractive as hell.

Inho came to set down next him quickly. Too quickly that he thought the alpha would fall into the river.

“Inho take care,” he said quickly and already had his hands out to grab him if need be.

Inho sat down and turned to look at him with a small smile.

“Are you worried about me?” He had one eyebrow raised curiously. He was probably half joking but still Gihun smiled shyly, looking at the river before looking back at Inho.

“You were very late last night; I was worried about you,” his smile was still there but he couldn’t help the worry seep into his scent.

Inho looked at him slight surprise. “Really?”

It was Gihun’s turn to look mildly confused. “What?”

Inho gave him a beautiful smile.

“Were you really worried?”

Gihun smiled like an idiot again before looking away, chuckling.

“Of course I was. You broke into a dead man’s house, and I had given you the address myself,” he said as he gestured his hands dramatically into the air but also smiled. Because he was suddenly incapable of not smiling at the man in front of him.

“I would never give up my informant’s name don’t worry,” he said sounding completely serious if it weren’t for the small smile on his face.

Gihun laughed loudly and Inho just watched him in wonder.

“Do you know what I wish for?” Gihun looked at him curiously, smiling.

“To find my sister first of all. Make sure she’s okay and then take her and you on one of these boats,” he gestured to a boat in the distance.

Gihun’s heart skipped a beat.

“Doesn’t matter where it goes. What matters is that it goes on.” Inho wasn’t even looking at the boat. Just looking him.

Gihun laughed again.

“You sound like people in the movies. Oh, you do know who had a love story like in the movies? Mr Park!” He whispered lowly, as if he was discussing scandalous gossip.

Inho looked at him in surprise before tilting his slightly.

“I also know someone like that.” Gihun looked at him excitedly and waited for him to continue.

“That person is me,” he said with a sly smile.

Gihun’s heart was beating too fast. It was almost exploding from the nearly overbearing happiness he was feeling. The happiness in his chest that traveled up to his face and made it hurt from smiling too hard. He looked towards the river and continued to smile.

“I went looking for my sister and found the kindest and most beautiful person on this earth.” Inho’s voice was deep and smooth like honey, his eyes like a worshiping vow.

Gihun looked at him, his face burning up from the blush that consumed him inside and out. He looked down in embarrassment because he couldn’t handle the look on Inho’s face. So open and so sincere. Full of nothing but admiration and what must be,

Love.

It must be love.

“Despite all of the obstacles between us, I just can’t stay away from you,” his voice was so calm and so endlessly soft. His eyes were gentle. Oh, so gentle. They trapped Gihun in their gaze.

And what a trap that was.

He finally found his voice again. “I actually know this movie. I’ve seen it before. Would you like to know how it ends?” He smirked at Inho with one brow raised teasingly.

“How does it end?” Inho looked at him seriously. As if he was waiting for a verdict.

“Well, the hero confesses his feelings and then…he’d get told that he was loved back. Something along the lines of. I love you without knowing how or why...You know, over the top things like 'I love you without a reason or a destination in mind. It was just a free fall I found myself in. One I’d gladly be in forever.'” Even though he masked it as though it was a hypothetical scene, he still confessed it with a beaming smile, his eyes shining in the sunlight.

Inho looked at him with his lips parted in surprise before slowly smiling wider and wider at the realization.

Gihun smiled just as brightly if not more because seeing Inho smile like that was like seeing the sun shining after a snowstorm.

Then, Inho leaned in slowly. And to him, leaning in was as easy as breathing, as existing. The force pulling him towards Inho was nothing he could ever fight or even want to resist.

He leaned in as just a slowly, his eyes closing, his smile intact until nothing of the distance was left.

Just two lips meeting underneath the sun.

His lips were warm and inviting, something he’d been waiting for a long time.

Inho’s hand went to his waist, holding him gently while his other hand went to his hair and titled his head with care so that he could deepen the kiss. Inho’s hands were so careful and gentle. Stroking his hair, like it was the most precious touch he could’ve ever had.

Right when Inho’s hand wandered lower towards his lower backside, did he feel his desire growing.

It was hot.

It was too hot.

Too hot that it suddenly woke him up.

Gihun jumped up in his bed, eyes wide as ever.

Oh my god

He just had a wet dream.

About Hwang Inho.

Hell it wasn’t even a wet dream.

What kind of wet dream would consist of a love confession? God he was such a sap. Of all the things he could’ve dreamt of doing, a simple confession under the sun was it for him apparently.

It wasn’t even about the desire he’d felt but the sheer unrivaled happiness he’d felt so deeply. So deeply that he could still feel it in his bones. He was so happy in his dream. Happier than he’d ever been before.

He wanted to feel it again.

All of it. Even the desire he could smell all over the room.

He wanted.

He took deep breaths, letting his tense shoulders relax and started smiling slowly in the empty room.

He put one hand over his mouth to fight the smile. He should be ashamed.

Mortified even and of course he was.

But he was also smiling.

Like a fool.

Lying back in bed and stuffing his face in the pillow, hoping it would shelter his smile from the world.

Because after worrying sick about him last night, notice his absence in every corner, realizing he missed him every moment when he wasn’t there, talking to Mrs Kang about an impossible type of love he found himself longing for and finally, finally seeing stars at night, it all made sense.

Falling into place like a final piece of the puzzle.

He was falling in love for the first time.

A love that was just like in the movies.

Falling for none other than Hwang Inho.

Chapter Text

Inho wasn’t having a good morning at all. The last 24 hours truly did a number on him. He didn’t even know what he should be bothered by more at this point. Investigating Ali’s place and finding his sister’s things, getting hit in the head or getting caught by the police.

He was lucky that he didn’t have a concussion and that the detective made a deal with him to continue his undercover role. He said that he was to be his eyes and ears at the hotel.

He didn’t know how to feel about that…

It was unnerving to be in close contact with a police officer, but he’d do anything for his sister. Even if he was risking himself. So yes, he was pretty lucky all things considered.

Still, yesterday was horrible to say the least and it didn’t help that after all that he had gone through, he went and got a front row seat to Gihun kissing that devil.

It made him want to throw up because Sangwoo could never deserve someone like Gihun. Someone so precious and kind.

He had felt his face get green as he saw them and had to resist not breaking them up immediately, because what made it even more difficult for him to bear was seeing Gihun so completely stiff in his hold. Because that’s not how someone should look when they’re getting kissed by their lovers. That’s the face you make when you ate something bad and realized it.

Inho had to leave the sight immediately because frankly he either would’ve thrown up or surely attacked that asshole. Of course he didn’t want to acknowledge the other feeling he had the moment he’d even entered that hallway and saw them. Even before that kiss.

It was just that Gihun hadn’t looked happy that’s all.

Nothing else. Nothing other than sheer protectiveness over the omega who’d been nothing but kind to him since his arrival.

But did that explain why he’d sulked away the moment he saw them kiss? Why he shut down any way for the omega to find him and to talk afterwards? How he couldn’t sleep well at all. Was it protectiveness that completely soured his mood and scent further than they had already been?

Yes, he couldn’t have it any other way.

He wouldn’t.

“You smell like someone stepped on your tail you know that?” Junho said in his best deadpan voice.

Inho adjusted his jacket without looking at him.

“I don’t have a tail,” he said briskly.

“Exactly,” he looked pointedly. Inho hoped Junho would stop talking about it now. He made his point.

Of course, he wasn’t that lucky.

“What happened to you last night? When you came back you were tired, sure, but when you returned from upstairs you just looked and smelled like you were two seconds away from committing a crime.” Junho narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously and waited for Inho to say anything.

That kid is going to make him commit a crime alright.

“What do you mean, I don’t smell like that,” he said calmly, looking at the mirror and trying to get his unruly hair in line.

Gaslighting Junho was his only choice right now because he couldn’t even begin to think about his feelings this early in the morning.

He was only human, and truth be told Junho made it too easy.

And fun.

“Mhm, sure… I don’t smell it quite as bad now but last night my god I could barely breathe. Now it’s faded though. Like you don’t want to kill but perhaps just injure someone,” he said dryly.

“Yeah, and that someone is you,” he retorted just as dryly, giving Junho his best bitch face.

Junho gasped scandalously. “Hyung, how dare you? I thought we’re friends. You wound me.”

Inho turned to stare at him again. God he’s pouting, he’s actually pouting.

Inho couldn’t help the quiet laugh erupting suddenly and Junho started smiling like a smug child.

Man, he’d needed it. Junho was someone who creeped past all his defenses so easily. He was just so- ridiculous. Inho was getting fonder of that little annoying brat everyday. He felt like an older brother again when he was with Junho.

Allowing himself to laugh at his shenanigans meant more than most things these days.

“There you go, now you don’t look like your dog just died. You’re welcome,” he said smugly and had the audacity to wink.

Inho threw a towel at his face before leaving the room.

He sighed as he made his way to the secret place.

He’d have to talk to Gihun. The other person he was growing attached to. Only with Gihun, he didn’t feel like an older brother at all.

No, he felt like a stammering child, nervous but also generally, deep down, way too excited. Because Gihun was a powerful ally to have that’s all.

Yes, that’s all there was to it.

Gihun took his time in front of the mirror, trying to style his hair more than usual. Adjusting his curls about 10 times before giving up. Every time he thought he was ready, he’d always find something that isn’t to his liking. Usually that wouldn’t bother him, but not today. Not anymore. He looked in the mirror to assess his dark navy-blue suit carefully one last time before finally deciding to go to the secret place.

He’s pathetic

But he was excited. He’d finally get to talk to Inho again. He’ll have the opportunity to spend a bit of time with him.

With his crush.

Yes, crush because after a long bath and truly waking up, Gihun decided he was just having a silly crush on the man. He’d been carried away by the magic of Mr Park’s love story and then carried even further by his dreams.

He just wasn’t sure that this could be love. He woke up thinking it was but then the longer he thought about the less it made sense to him. How could he be falling in love with someone he barely knew?

He didn’t even know what love felt like.

He did know that Inho was a genuine person. A kindhearted alpha.

Who happened to smell great, like an endless pine forest he could lose himself in.

And happened to have eyes deeper than the ocean, intense and beautiful when they looked at him.

And a calm commanding presence he was not only drawn to but one he also actively sought out.

And he had a body that looked like that of a Greek god

One he could easy imagine na-

Okay it must be infatuation

And a crush.

Well, whatever it was, he needs to shut it down. He is an engaged man.

But, if he happens to find out how he truly feels about Inho, that wouldn’t be so bad.

Just for clarity.

He made sure to not be seen by anyone as he quickly went down the stairs of the veranda. He was breathing heavily, his heart beating far too quickly. Was this feeling new or was it always this way with Inho and he was only just noticing it now? He kept telling himself as he reached the clearing that maybe when he actually sees the real Inho, he wouldn’t feel a thing. Maybe it was really just his dream.

Yes, he’d try and to think that way. To preserve the peace.

And his engagement.

He would see Inho, and he won’t even care at-

He wasn’t here yet…

Gihun looked around the place.

Really? He figured he’d be the late one with all the staring in the mirror.

He paced around before deciding to sit down by the river, taking his shoes off and letting his feet dangle near the water.

Like in his dream.

Only this time, Gihun didn’t feel the endless warmth of the sun. The sky was greyish, clouds everywhere, covering the warmth he desperately needed.

He stared at the water, hoping it would take his nerves away but the more he looked the more nervous he became.

What was he doing. Dressing up for someone who wasn’t his fiancé. Having dreams about a stranger. How could he feel this way?

Gihun looked at the ring on his finger and started anxiously tugging at it.

There he was, engaged to his childhood love and still he found himself excited to see another man at a secret place. How could he do this to Sangwoo who loved him more than anything?

The voices in his head, waking him up and admonishing him for his stupidity, grew louder in the silence without Inho.

He couldn’t think of Inho in that way.

Then, a voice in his head countered back bitterly that it was Sangwoo that he couldn’t think of that way.

As the minutes ticked by, gone was the excitement that had turned into dread and gone was the smile that had turned into a frown.

He would put a boundary between them. He had no choice. He was engaged.

He looked up in time to to see Inho looking around. He didn’t have his uniform on.

When Inho didn’t notice him, Gihun realized he’d steered away from eyes sight and that he sat hidden from Inho’s eyes. Inho turned around to probably leave and the thought of Inho leaving again made him jump into action.

He can’t leave him.

Gihun walked quickly to where Inho he gone, completely forgetting the fact that he was barefoot.

Guess his thoughts went out the window at the sight of Inho after all.

He walked until he saw that Inho was heading back towards him. He turned around quickly like an idiot and pretended not to see him. His stupid head telling him that he shouldn’t seem desperate.

“Gihunssi, good morning,” Inho greeted him as he walked down the stairs.

“Were you just leaving or did you just get here,” he asked slightly confused.

Shit he’d seen Gihun heading to the stairs. He needed to deflect.

“What, is it your secret place now? should I ask for permission?” He winced internally at his attitude. Inho didn’t deserve to endure this behavior just because of whatever the hell he was feeling. Still, he couldn’t stop himself from being rude.

His fear telling him to put distance and boundaries between them.

To stop whatever this is, whatever could make him fall deeper.

Deeper?

No, he wouldn’t fall at all.

“No, of course not. I just couldn’t find you here yesterday,” he said carefully. Like someone who was speaking to a kid who was about to throw a tantrum.

Bad news for Inho that he was spot on.

“But you did find me yesterday.” Another cold blow. Another internal wince.

At the mention of that, Gihun saw Inho’s jaw clench. He knew that wouldn’t be directed at him, even if he would kind off deserve it right now.

It was something else. Something angry and bitter. His pine forest scent was turning into that of a storm.

Could it be? Something like…jealousy?

No, no Gihun wouldn’t let this feed his delusions. Inho was probably stressed about something else.

“Yes, but we couldn’t speak,” he said quietly, his scent returning to a careful mellow fragrance. “I needed to talk to you before going to the-”

“I don’t care about what you do in your spare time, all I care about are the few days time you asked of me and please don’t ask for more because this is getting too dangerous,” he said matter of factly with a frown on his face. Not quite cold yet but not warm at all. Not like him.

God what was wrong with him? Why was he so rude to someone who’d only been nice? Someone he had a freaking dream about kissing. Maybe that’s why actually…

He felt like he couldn’t say one single normal phrase to Inho. Like if he were to be nice to him, he’d be confirming his feelings and if he confirmed his feelings then he’d confirm that he was incapable of loving Sangwoo, his actual fiancé.

He had a feeling that if he were to be nice to Inho, nothing would stop him from falling for this man.

He was protecting himself.

He had to.

He couldn’t feel this way; he wasn’t allowed to be fascinated by someone other than his fiancé.

Inho looked surprised and a bit hurt.

God he was horrible. He’d hurt him.

It’s not like he truly means it. Truth was that he obviously didn’t want Inho to leave. He’d give him more time of course. He just couldn’t be normal about it, God forbid Inho notices his overt kindness and begins to question it.

“You should care. Because I’m meeting with detective Park Jungbae to give him Saebyeok’s bloody clothes that Sangwoo tried to burn,” Inho spoke just as formally as he had. His face completely blank.

He’d hurt him.

But he was on a self-destructive roll, and he couldn’t stop.

“So, you lied and told me you’re going to Ali’s house but went to the detective?” He put his hands on his hips and frowned some more.

If Inho wanted look at him blankly, then he’d make sure to provoke him.

He was sick, actually sick.

Inho wasn’t his enemy. He was the opposite of that and that’s what bothered him. He couldn’t help but project his frustration on the person who’d unintentionally caused it in the first place.

“No, I didn’t lie. I went to Ali’s place. But I got hit in the head and lost consciousness,” Inho said dryly.

Wait what?

Okay now he’s gonna be sick.

Gihun’s eyes widened in surprise and then looked down in guilt.

He had rushed to blame him while he had gotten attacked…

“Are you okay?” He asked quietly, his concern while quiet, was everywhere. On his face, in his scent, in his eyes.

Inho paused, looking at him like he was a confusing contradiction before sighing, like Gihun’s concern was enough to calm down for.

“Yes. I woke up and found the detective next to me, telling me that I was the prime suspect. So, I had to give him the evidence-”

“Evidence for what? That Sangwoo is a killer?”

Despite everything, he was protective of his fiancé. Especially after the dream.

God, he’s overcompensating…

“No. Evidence that he is involved. I’m not saying how. That’s why I got the person who could find out more. You wanted me to involve the police anyway, right?” Inho looked tired from arguing this with him.

He was right.

Still, his emotions were all over the place.

“I told you what Sangwoo told me though,” he said it like it meant something. Like Sangwoo’s words to him were enough evidence. But even he could feel his voice waver.

“Pardon me, but I don’t think he’d tell you about his former relationships and how he’d hurt them,” Inho frowned at him slightly before looking away.

Gihun’s eyes narrowed.

He didn’t just say that.

“No, your sister may have been in a relationship with Sangwoo. In her head,” Inho looked up in surprise and something worse than hurt.

Disappointment.

Gihun was really self destructive at this point, raising his eyebrows in mockery. “And for your information, he told me that he had his flings when I was gone but that he never loved anyone but me,” Inho looked away at that.

Gihun wondered if it was because of him saying that Sangwoo loved him or if it was because it meant that his sister hadn’t been.

“It’s only natural for Saebyeok to want someone like Sangwoo to love her,” he glared before walking away from Inho who looked completely empty and cold.

The moment Gihun walked away, he regretted his words immediately. He wanted to turn around and apologize for his words. The words he knew had hurt Inho. He’d gone too far in his effort to put space between them.

Well, he had been successful that’s for sure.

But at what cost?

Inho, who been nothing but a gentleman?

He couldn’t bring himself to turn around and face the man he was being unjust to. His mind reminding him Sangwoo and how he had been unjust to him too. Even in his dreams, he’d been unjust to Sangwoo.

It had to stop.

So, he walked on, away from Inho.

Still barefoot…

Later that afternoon, Gihun sat with Junhee, Myunggi, his mother and Sangwoo. Junhee hadn’t been the same after her fall. She was moody. More than before and would snap at Myunggi the whole time for no reason.

Gihun knew something was wrong in her sour scent. He’d tried to talk to her about it, but she’d shut him down every time saying she was fine and that nothing was wrong with her.

When he’d talk to his mother about it, she’d also act like nothing was wrong.

It was odd but as long as she was okay, he wouldn’t bother her.

He was listening to them bickering when he noticed Inho in the distance, trying to catch his eye.

He’d been doing that since he had returned from his meeting with the detective.

Gihun tried hard to ignore his looks. He couldn’t talk to Inho after what he had said this morning. A part of him was still irrationally angry at Inho while another part was just angry at himself.

He decided that since his anxiety got the best of him today, he’d continue letting it. He established the boundaries and now he was practicing how to deal with it. Simply lie in the grave he’d dug.

However, his progress wasn’t ideal. For his eyes would always wander to where Inho stood before snapping back to reality.

He can’t stop looking or thinking about this man and it’s driving him crazy.

Then, Junho approached them looking nervous.

“Detective Park is waiting for you sir,” he said looking at Sangwoo.

Sangwoo frowned but Gihun noticed his grip on the wine glass tighten. He watched his mother and Sangwoo staring at each other before standing up to go downstairs.

What did Inho do now?

“Is this about the receptionist again?” Madame Seong asked as she sat down in the general manger chair.

She must’ve known it wasn’t because she had made sure that case would be buried.

Detective Jungbae only smirked before clearing his throat.

“Hwang Saebyeok,” he said the name without giving any further information and watched Cho Sangwoo’s eyes snap to his in attention.

Madame Seong however, looked disinterested.

“She was fired after getting a promotion not too long before it. For stealing something that hadn’t been stolen,” he said with his signature smirk and looked at Sangwoo in question.

“That was just a rumor among the servants. In truth, she had stolen from us,” he replied without missing a beat.

“Why didn’t you report that then?” His assistant Daeho asked quickly, writing everything down.

“Because we don’t need useless trash to ruin our reputation.” It was Madame Seong that answered, her eyes not leaving Jungbae’s.

He smirked wider.

“Then where is her uniform?” He observed that Sangwoo looked away at the mention of the uniform while Madame Seong shrugged.

“She must’ve handed it over. Truthfully, I don’t even remember her,” she said without missing a beat.

“Is that so? Then, please call in the staff’s manager. She must know more about her then.”

Silence echoed in the room while Jungbae relished in the tense atmosphere.

He smirked one last time before continuing.

“In the meantime, lake a look at this,” he said while bringing out a package from his suitcase and putting it in front of Madame Seong on the table.

She looked at it with mild disgust.

“What is it?”

He only gestured for her to open it.

She took a pen and opened it without touching it, watching it unfurl into the bloody uniform.

He watched Sangwoo pale slightly at the sight while Madame Seong looked at it with surprise.

“She didn’t hand it over then,” she said absentmindedly and then regained her composure. “Well, if she was capable of stealing alcohol, then it wouldn’t be difficult for her to steal clothes either.”

“Hm, and the blood?”

Sangwoo smirked. “Depends on where you found it sir.”

Jungbae smirked back. “It was brought to me.”

“Then suspect whoever brought it to you,” Madame Seong interjected coldly while Sangwoo nodded along.

Detective Park Jungbae only smirked in answer.

Gihun was back at the secret place, pacing as he waited for Inho to show up. The moment he saw him coming, he stared talking loudly.

“Is the detective here because of you?”

He was on edge, and it showed.

Inho came to stand in front of him, a hand going through his hair messily.

“I tried to get you to look at me so I could warn you, but you were with Sangwoo.” Inho looked apologetic.

It wasn’t enough to put out the fire.

“Mr. Sangwoo. He’s your boss or is that so difficult for you to acknowledge now?” He was petty. He knew it. But he was too defensive of his family.

Of the fiancé he didn’t love enough.

The least he could do was defend him. He owed him that.

Inho’s patient look looked frayed. Like a ticking bomb.

He took a deep breath before frowning at Gihun.

“I did what you told me to do and you’re still mad?” He looked and smelled frustrated to no end.

Gihun was frustrated with himself too. But he was caught up in a dilemma Inho couldn’t begin to understand.

He had feelings. Feelings he shouldn’t have but still did. Feelings for the wrong person. It was tearing him apart to betray a man who trusts him like that. Even if it was just in a dream. How could he betray a man who he trusted and expected to trust him back? He had always trusted Sangwoo throughout the years. And it felt horrible to interrogate him on his former flings while he dreamed of another during their goddamn engagement.

How could he have the audacity to doubt Sangwoo when he wasn’t the best either. When he dreamed of loving another man.

Sangwoo was a man who had only ever loved him. He had to fight for that.

For him.

“I didn’t tell you Sangwoo was a criminal!” He looked at Inho incredulously.

“No, but you told me to involve the police, so I did,” his frown only deepened but his voice never got louder.

Never would.

The same can’t be said for Gihun.

“I told you to look for your sister, not to accuse my fiancé of murder!” His eyes flickered with sudden realization. “You- you knew earlier today! You looked me in the eye, knowing the cop would show up and didn’t bother to tell me?” His eyebrows were knitted in anger and shock.

Suddenly, everything else didn’t matter. Inho hadn’t told him? Why did that bother him so much more?

Inho straight up scowled.

“Why are you treating me like this?”  He tilted his head slightly and watched Gihun as he looked away, walking a few steps away.

He is being irrationally defensive and is projecting what should he even say? He couldn’t begin to explain to Inho how deep that question went. How he could barely answer it in his head.

Inho’s narrowed eyes followed him.

“I lied to the detective. I didn’t tell him that Sangwoo was the one who burnt the dress.”

Inho didn’t know why he’d done that.

Actually, he did know.

He did it to protect Gihun. He didn’t want to hurt him by formally accusing his fiancé.

Turns out Gihun would be mad any way.

He hoped that Gihun would at least calm down now that his fiancé was in the clear. However, surprisingly, he still looked mad.

“Thank you but I’m not mad about the police being here. I’m mad because you didn’t tell me about it,” he said with disappointment in his voice.

Oh.

“You don’t have to cover for him anyway. I’m sure he’s telling the detective everything he knows because he has nothing to hide. Your sister is the one with a wild imagination and Sangwoo is the one paying the price for it,” he narrowed his eyes challengingly at Inho.

Or was it desperately?

He couldn’t tell anymore.

Inho’s expression hardened, only looking at the ground.

“In any case, you don’t have to pretend to be Youngil anymore. It’s all over now. The police will deal with it,” he looked at Inho with his forehead creased.

The air was heavy with tension. The finality of the words hitting both of them.

But Gihun didn’t take them back as he went to go, leaving Inho standing alone for the fourth or fifth time.

Gihun waited outside the office for Sangwoo to finish talking to his mother. The moment he came out, he linked his arm with Gihun’s and started walking towards one of the tables set for them.

“So, did you tell him everything so we can be done with this topic?” Gihun glanced at Sangwoo who frowned in confusion.

“What topic?”

“The topic of Saebyeok,” he said carefully, seeing the frown on Sangwoo’s face deepen.

“What made you think it’s about her?”

Shit…

“Wasn’t it about her?” He played dumb. Sangwoo always bought that.

Then, as though he were watching an actor preparing for a scene, he saw Sangwoo’s face turn blank with indifference.

“No, it wasn’t about her at all. It was about some other girl who had escaped from the time you were gone,” he said it so calmly.

Too calmly.

Like it was second nature to lie to him.

Oh, how the lie fell easy from his lips.

Gihun’s heart dropped, as he sat down at the table.

“Oh,” it was the only thing he managed to say at Sangwoo’s lie.

“Yes, it happens a lot more than you think. That’s why I don’t wish for you to talk to them. We’re something else entirely.”

‘Above them’ is what he meant with his words… He felt such a dread that he didn’t even argue about how doesn’t see staff that way. Instead, he decided to give Sangwoo one final chance.

To be truthful. To prove that what he’d done to Inho wasn’t for nothing.

“So, he wasn’t here for her?” His big eyes were trained on Sangwoo, begging him to say the truth. To save the last piece of trust between them.

The very trust he’d fought with Inho over all day.

“No, not at all,” he said with an easy smile.

He smiled and Gihun’s heart dropped further, his entire being becoming frozen down to the core.

Who was this man?

How could he look him in the eye and lie so easily like it were breathing.

Gihun swallowed heavily before smiling back.

He wanted to throw up.

All this fighting, all his defensiveness was for a man who was capable of lying to him with a big smile on his face.

Gihun looked at his lap before looking up the stairs and seeing Inho talking to his manager.

His eyes rounded slightly more at the sight of him. Looking at him like he was drowning, hoping for Inho to save him.

He looked away quickly when Sangwoo started talking.

“I have a meeting to get to,” Sangwoo smiled at him brightly.

“I’ll stay and eat,” his smile didn’t reach his eyes and Sangwoo nodded before excusing himself.

Gihun felt like he could breathe again when Sangwoo left.

He looked down at the plate, broken.

Sangwoo, his fiancé, the man who loved him, the man he had trusted was a liar. Because if he wasn’t, then he wouldn’t have lied about Saebyeok. He wouldn’t dodge all of his questions, and he wouldn’t give him the feeling of broken fractured trust. He had said it to Inho today and now his own words echo back.

He’ll say everything he knows because he has nothing to hide. These words are now like a weapon he’d aimed at Inho that was turned towards him instead.

He looked up sadly, eyes glassy, when he felt a presence next to him. Inho stood next to him, his face completely blank. He placed an empty glass on the table before placing a blue-green diary next to him.

“That’s Saebyeok’s diary,” he said emotionlessly. Like it was evidence. A silent warning to stop doubting him.

Gihun sad frown deepened. “I don’t need it anymore Inho,” he whispered shakily, shaking his head weakly.

He finally believed him without hesitation.

But it was a bit too late.

He’d hurt Inho today.

Inho didn’t react at all. He only kept direct blank eye contact as he placed his food on the table and Gihun saw it for what it was. What it felt like.

A punishment.

Inho was punishing him with silence, with the cold.

And damn it if it didn’t make breathing harder. He was on the verge of crying as he watched Inho walk away from him without a single word. He’d spoken about his sister like she was crazy. He’d doubted him time and time again. Punished him for his own stupid feelings. Hung on to a liar for far too long.

Worst of all, he had told the only man who made him feel warmth, that he should leave.

He needed to fix it.

He couldn’t let Inho leave now.

Gihun went upstairs to his room, shoulders slumped and head down. He felt like he didn’t recognize anything anymore in the place he called home.

Lying down on the sofa, he held the diary tighter. He couldn’t bring himself to open it.

He was scared of what it said, what it confirms. But how long will he trust blindly? How long can he defend Sangwoo and ignore all the signs Inho is showing him?

He sniffled, unaware of the small tears that began to fall down his cheek.

One even fell on the diary.

He looked at it and thought about the whole day. How he’d woken up happy, feeling the warmth of a kiss he never had. The warmth of feelings he hadn’t noticed creeping up on him.

Inho had been so kind and patient with him and what had he given back? A raised voice and a bad temper, shielding the crippling doubt and guilt towards Sangwoo. Holding him back.

He looked at his ring, holding his hand up to eye level. It was gold and elegant, but it never shined to him. It never felt like belonging, it felt like a cage. Gihun sniffled again, thinking of every ‘I love you’ he ever heard from Sangwoo. Every vow and promise that felt like another lie now.

Sangwoo was a liar and a cold blooded one at that. Capable of deceiving and hiding things. He was everything he never once showed to him. Every sweet word clashed with every lie uttered, and the line blurred until Gihun realized he truly didn’t know this man.

And then there was Inho. Kind, gentle and utterly mysterious Inho.

He was different from Sangwoo in many ways. For one, he didn’t lie.

He snorted quietly.

He didn’t know him that well, true but his heart just knew that Inho never lied to him.

A bitter voice told him that his heart hadn’t known of Sangwoo’s lies either.

He shook his head faintly.

His heart had always felt uneasy with Sangwoo, holding back like it knew it wasn’t safe to fall. But with Inho, he’d fall blindly any day.

Inho doesn’t throw his kind words around like Sangwoo does with him. Inho’s words are sparse. But not because there isn’t much to say, but because he only says them when they count. His eyes aren’t just trained to take everything apart and analyze how it can benefit him, he observes intensely and keeps everything to himself. Not because he doesn’t care or that he’ll use it against him later, but because he doesn’t want to intrude. Doesn’t wish to make it worse.

He’d seen it when he had been on the verge of a breakdown at the thought of Sangwoo being involved in a murder and Inho had offered him a gentle distraction.

An out.

He noticed it, of course he had. How Inho’s eyes were furious at the mention of Sangwoo but would always soften at him when his scent turned distressed.

Inho didn’t take advantage of his doubt or sadness, didn’t once rub it in. Just offered gentle understanding eyes and a comforting scent that kept him going.

And God, it made him feel a hundred times worse.

Because it made it so much easier to fall for this man.

He was kind, understanding and honest. He was a breath of fresh air; he was an anchor in a storm. He was everything he wished Sangwoo could be.

He leaned his head back on the sofa and thought of his dream, how happy he had been. How he woke up still feeling it all over, how he’d dressed up carefully just to look good. To impress. How nervous but excited he had been to meet with Inho before the guilt creeped in.

He’d let his guilt and doubt take the chance of feeling happiness. He had destroyed his chance to test if he felt something.

And what was it for?

To hang onto another one of Sangwoo’s lies. He’d ignored the stars in favour of the cloudy sky.

The stars.

Gihun stood up quickly and went to the window to check the early night sky, begging that it wasn’t too late. That he hadn’t let them slip away.

He looked almost frantically at the sky, not taking a single breath until he could-

Two shining stars.

Just two in the darkish blue sky. They were side by side.

Gihun released the breath he was holding, gazing at the stars in relief.

It wasn’t too late. It can’t be if they’re still here.

Gihun looked at them intently, making his mind up in this very moment.

After trying to hang onto Sangwoo and almost drowning in his lies, he decided that enough was enough. He will stop hiding and running from the only thing that made him feel normal.

The only thing that made him feel.

Later in the evening, they all sat down to eat dinner. Gihun wasn’t paying attention to anything happening around him. All he did was look around the hall in the hope of getting a single glance of him.

He was beginning to fear his harsh words had driven Inho away when he finally thought he saw him.

No, it wasn’t him. Gihun sagged in his seat in subtle disappointment.

Sangwoo suddenly stood up, saying something about having work to finish. He’d been moody since his mother had talked to him. Gihun hadn’t cared to even ask what was wrong. He didn’t even try to listen to him.

It was probably just another lie.

His eyes kept tracing every single waiter until they finally fell on him.

There he finally was.

Gihun sighed quietly, not taking his eyes off Inho as if he was scared that he’d disappear again.

He was moving gracefully around the room, serving everyone quietly and efficiently. He looked so focused on his tasks.

So good.

He kept gazing at the beauty that was Hwang Inho, hoping that he would look back. He knew the alpha had strong instincts. So, for minutes to pass without a single glance back, Gihun knew Inho was ignoring him or at least pretending not to notice him.

Gihun looked away in guilt. He couldn’t blame Inho for being mad.

But he realized he was greedy and selfish anyway.

Because he still continued to look at him again despite Inho maintaining the distance he himself had created between them.

Guess he was a hypocrite too.

It was just impossible to look away now that he noticed him. Now that he made a tentative promise to the stars above. A promise he intended to keep.

He would talk to Inho. He wouldn’t avoid or run away. He’d keep his promise and wouldn’t the stars slip away. Not before he got the chance to find out if the sparks in his dreams were only a figment of his imagination or something more.

And if a brazen gesture was the only way to get Inho’s attention…

Then so be it.

Gihun stared at Inho, his eyes round and intent. The moment Inho was in close proximity he spoke up.

“Excuse me,” he said loud enough for Inho to hear, his own eyes a fraction too wide as if they were in disbelief at his own actions. There was a single second where his mind imagined Inho ignoring him.

He shuddered at the thought.

But thankfully, Inho paused and turned around to look at him.

His face didn’t give anything away as always.

But Gihun could read his mind. Could read the ‘really? In front of everyone?’ behind his deep dark eyes. Still, he started walking towards him and Gihun froze in nervousness.

Why was he suddenly so bold?

He glanced over to Mrs Kang nervously who sat next to him, listening to Junhee brag about how Myunggi is now second in command to Sangwoo at managing the hotel. Something about being a co manager. Huh, maybe that’s the reason behind Sangwoo being moody.

Making sure no one was paying him any mind; he looked back over to Inho who reached his table and leaned over slightly so Gihun could speak quietly in his ear.

“Save me a cigarette,” he whispered. Looking at Inho with tentative hope.

Begging him to take the lifeline he put out.

Inho however, only blinked in surprise. Turning his head to glance at him before looking around the table blankly.

“Here?” He whispered just as quietly, sounding very much incredulous even without showing it.

Gihun looked at Inho and couldn’t help the big smile creeping up on him without meaning to. He tried to hide it immediately, but he reckoned he still looked way to happy for someone who was speaking to a server. Not that it was anything new. He always smiled at the staff but the fact that it’s Inho made him very much self conscious about something he used to do so naturally. Because he knew this time there was more than kindness behind his smile.

“Not here. There,” he stressed the last word and titled his head subtly towards the exit. He still had the small smile threatening to show too much.

Inho glanced back at him, his face unreadable, before giving one short nod and leaving.

Gihun watched him leave for a few seconds before looking around the table and was relieved that no one had noticed a thing. He looked at his plate and swallowed the giddy smile down, wishing for time to hurry up so he can go to the secret place.

After finishing up, Gihun went quickly to his suite to get the lighter.

Okay and to look at the mirror in case he needed to change or something.

He was ridiculous.

He couldn’t stop the chuckle at his own expense. He’d started his day by dressing up and obsessing over his appearance in the mirror and he was ending his day by doing it all over again.

And both times had been for Inho.

He huffed merely in amusement this time not allowing any doubt to creep in on him. Today had taught him a lesson.

That he should listen to his heart more.

And currently his heart was telling him to follow it to the secret place.

He left the hotel; his steps were quicker than usual in their anticipation. God, he felt like a schoolgirl going to meet her crush. Still, he couldn’t help the small smile on his face.

He will finally give himself a chance to get to know Inho better and to see which conclusions the sparks would lead him to.

There he is.

Gihun’s thoughts and steps halted suddenly, his eyes widening and his lips parting in a smile.

Inho. Sitting on the bench waiting for him.

He had taken his jacket off, wearing the white shirt only.

Oh lord he still felt it. He still felt the excitement and happiness from his dream. If anything, the feeling was more amplified now. He felt everything even more acutely. The same shy hesitant warmth in his chest. It was the very warmth he had denied himself today morning.

But now, in the quiet night air, no clouds were out to get him and drag him back to the despair. It was just him and his feelings now.

Gihun couldn’t help but watch him a bit longer.

There he sat, his side profile as handsome as ever, staring at the river thoughtfully as if the whole world was on his shoulders. Gihun’s small open smile became a closed one that was a little bit shyer as he helplessly tilted his head slightly at the wonder that was Inho.

He was so beautiful. Gihun had never admitted it to himself, but Inho was stunning. He had been stunning in the moonlight the moment they met. Wearing the white suit. His face shining with the faint glow of the lighter as he lit his cigarette. He managed to even make the hotel’s uniform look glamorous. Black and white suited him and made him so attractive.

Even if he wore a freaking potato sack, he’d still look as handsome as ever, Gihun just knew it.

Gihun took a deep breath and looked at his own suit, straightening it for the fifth time and making sure the imaginary dust was gone. He looked back up at Inho who still hadn’t noticed he’s here. He suddenly had a stupid urge that made him smile mischievously.

Watching Inho so lost in thought made him decide to just sneak up on him. He made sure his scent was inodorous for a moment, reining it all in and proceeded to go down the stairs quietly.

God this was making him stupid already.

He walked behind the bench carefully. Once he was close enough, he sat down quickly next to Inho.

A bit closer than he should.

He couldn’t help it.

“Where’s my cigarette?” He asked humorously.

Inho didn’t jump, barely even reacted. Only his face showing his surprise as he turned his head to see Gihun sitting closely next to him.

“Uh, hello Gihunssi,” he greeted neutrally as he subtly moved away from Gihun.

Gihun’s smile dropped slightly.

But not because he moved away. Knowing Inho, he probably did it give him space because that’s the gentleman he was.

Damn him for being so nice.

But what Gihun couldn’t accept was the formality. He hated the sound of it coming from Inho. Had he always said Gihunssi? He hoped not.

“Um, hey. You don’t have to use formalities between us. Just my name would be great,” he smiled at Inho who looked even more surprised now.

“Are you sure?” He raised one brow curiously.

God why was he so painfully polite. It’s killing him.

“Of course. You’re Inho and I’m Gihun. We share too many secrets for you to be formal now,” he teased.

Inho relaxed slightly and if Gihun was not mistaken, he saw a shadow of a smile before Inho hid it by looking at his lap. It only made him smile harder, like it was a victory.

He was so excited that he was positive that he must’ve lost his mind.

Inho handed him a cigarette and Gihun decided that he truly lost his mind because his next move was to say:

“I don’t have a lighter, do you have some matches?” He raised his eyebrows in faux innocence.

Like he hadn’t gone to his room to get it.

Inho lit a match and held it close to his mouth.

Gihun placed his hands around Inho’s match, careful not get too close to his hand.

Or the match because at this point, he’d become stupid enough to burn himself accidentally.

His narrowed eyes were focused on the cigarette lighting up that he missed the gaze trained on his face.

On his lips.

Once it lit, Gihun leaned back to smile at Inho who looked a bit…. unreadable.

“So, what were you daydreaming about?” He asked with a small smile.

He wanted to apologize to Inho but right now, he also wanted to know him more and the faint scent of pine, cigarettes and night breeze was making him far too relaxed.

“I was thinking about Saebyeok,” he said quietly, giving him a small, short smile that was filled with longing.

Gihun looked away, both in sympathy and embarrassment.

This man was not on holiday here for god’s sake, he was looking for his missing sister. There is no way, he’d even consider feeling or thinking of anything that wasn’t her wellbeing.

“I was thinking about our childhood. When we used to play back at our relative's home. We were orphans and had never met our parents.” Gihun turned his body to the side so that he could look at Inho properly, facing him. His lips pulled together in sadness. Inho had been so strong. Fighting to find his only family left.

“I’d ask her every year during harvest time what she wished for. We used to get some money at that time of year,” he smiled wistfully, “she said she wished for earrings.”

Then his expression fell.

“But that year, the crop was burnt. We woke up in the middle of the night to the sounds of screams…She was scared. So was I, but I took her in my arms and calmed her down until she slept.” Inho’s eyes glistened in the moonlight, his voice trying to remain unwavering.

Gihun wished he could comfort him, hug him. Until he could forget about all the horrible nightmares he had to endure.

“When I woke up the next day, she wasn’t there. They had taken her to live with other relatives because they couldn’t afford the both of us anymore,” he said evenly, only frowning slightly as his eyes continued to glimmer in the darkness.

Gihun couldn’t believe they had separated them as children. Taken away the only family Inho had left away from him. He looked at Inho sadly and realized that this man was stronger than anyone he had ever met before. His hand that was leaning on the bench twitched, fighting the urge to hold Inho. To show him that he was here.

“What happened then?” He asked gently.

“My heart was broken that they had taken my sister away from me,” Inho turned to look at him.

He never looked more determined.

“That’s why I won't let it happen again,” he looked at Gihun, eyes still shining but looking fiercer than ever.

Gihun frowned sadly but nodded.

“I’m so sorry for today. I-”

“No, it’s fine I understand,” Inho interrupted quickly. But Gihun merely shook his head.

“No, I was too harsh on you... I’m sorry Inho,” he said sadly, his face a picture of apology, his scent a trace of remorse.

And because of every mistake he made today, he said his second promise of the day out loud.

“I will do whatever it takes to help you find her,” he echoed Inho’s own determination. Meaning every single word.

Inho turned to look at him in surprise. Gihun’s promise rendering him speechless.

“Gihunssi, you didn’t believe me two days ago… I didn’t think you’d believe me at all,” he sounded as surprised as he looked.

The corners of his lips twitched at how adorable the alpha looked when he was surprised.

Or did he look impressed?

Or was it something else entirely.

“Told you not to call me that,” he teased with a lopsided grin. “I’m your friend here, you can leave the formalities back there,” he gestured to the direction of the hotel.

And then he facepalmed internally, because congratulations to him.

He just friend zoned himself.

Inho raised an eyebrow and continued to just watch him silently.

His intense gaze was something he wanted to drown in and run away from. But running away wasn’t an option because he realized in this very moment that he would never want to run away from Inho.

Then, Inho smiled.

It was a beautiful smile. Just small and full of willingness to trust. It was everything.

“Why are you doing this?” Inho said almost absentmindedly, it felt full of reverence.

Gihun softened, something familiar from his dream unfurling deep in his chest.

He was beginning to know why now.

He was probably falling. Falling for his kindness, his fierceness, his courage, his honesty, his beautiful eyes, his deep voice, his comforting scent.

Falling for him.

But he couldn’t say it.

He looked away for a small moment before looking back at Inho who hadn’t looked away once.

“Because I felt your sadness over your sister.”

And then,

“I felt.” He whispered softly. Knowing now that the unfinished sentence left space for words unsaid, leaving the door open for something beautiful.

Something he dreamed about, longed for.

Something close to love.

Inho looked at him in the dark, his eyes gentle and his lips almost quirking in a smile too revealing in the night.

Magical wasn’t enough to describe the fireworks in his heart.

Inho didn’t say anything, just gazed at him as though he was the most interesting thing in the whole world. He didn’t look stunned or hopeful, but Gihun felt it off him. It was in his eyes and scent. He was quiet but his silence was ever so loud.

Everything and nothing were said.

But their eyes remained glued to one another.

Until Gihun felt like he would pass out.

“You should go to sleep now,” he said tentatively.

Inho blinked and huffed a quiet chuckle, looking back at the water.

“I don’t think I can sleep tonight,” he said with a small smile on his face.

A smile so charming and so knowing, it almost stole his breath away.

He grinned.

“One more cigarette then?” He teased and raised a brow in question.

“As you wish,” Inho already had the cigarette out in record time.

And Gihun could only smile at him and turn to look at the night sky.

It was full of stars.

“Tell me more about yourself,” he said quietly, eyes still gazing at the stars.

“Like what?” Inho looked at him.

“What was your real job before coming here? Where did you live? Have you ever been to the south before? Do you like it?” He realized he was asking way too much at once, letting his curiosity get the best of him. He finally looked at Inho, sheepishly to find Inho smirking at him.

Gihun was embarrassed but before he could dwell on it, Inho started talking.

“I used to be an accountant living in the capital. I have never been here before,” Gihun didn’t miss the slight note of sadness in that answer. “As for your final question,” he looked at Gihun with a small smile. “It is beautiful here.”

Gihun’s embarrassment became shyness, looking at his lap like it was suddenly very interesting.

Inho just looked at him.

The stars shined brighter.

They each looked at the stars together as the minutes flew by, reveling in the silence and comfort of being with one another, somewhere where they cannot be found.

Somewhere they can be themselves.

When the smoke faded, Gihun knew he had to return.

He took a deep breath and turned to Inho. “I have to go back,” he said quietly, internally dejected that the night was ending.

Inho looked at him and nodded in understanding. And then as if to make it feel better for him, he said, “I have to go too. I have to work early.”

Like it was meant to make Gihun feel less bad about leaving.

Gihun saw the kindness in it. Saw the simple act of trying to comfort him.

He loved it.

He nodded timidly and stood slow. Before he began to walk away from Inho, he decided he just wanted a tiny bit more time.

He turned back to look at Inho who had stood as well. “Walk with me?” He was glad the darkness hid the hope on his face.

Inho paused, just looking at him for a moment before nodding hesitantly.

Gihun knew why. They can’t be seen together. They shouldn’t walk back together.

They didn’t care.

They walked together, Inho letting Gihun pass first before going up the stairs. They walked the five minutes in silence.

Gihun didn’t want to say more than he already had. He didn’t want to be obvious.

And Inho?

He probably didn’t even know of a single thing going thorough his mind. His heart.

He was probably tired, stressed, worried.

But not feeling it.

Gihun knew that and it surprisingly hurt but he could never expect anything from Inho. He knew that the only thing on Inho’s mind was Saebyeok. He couldn’t and wouldn’t say anything to Inho. Not just because it was embarrassing or mortifying to tell someone about your very new feelings. Not even because he was almost certain that Inho didn’t feel the way he was feeling. But because Inho wasn’t anyone, he was haunted, burdened and had his guard up high.

Gihun didn’t want to burden him further. Didn’t want to ever disrupt the fragile beautiful silence and peace they had created between them. As they reached the end of the path that was close by the stairs of the veranda, Gihun felt that the comfort of being next to Inho in the night was enough.

Inho stopped walking. “You can go first. I’ll wait a bit longer,” he didn’t say ‘so no one could see us’, but Gihun heard it anyway.

He nodded once and went to turn before looking back at Inho and smiling nervously.

“Goodnight Inho.”

Inho, ever so unreadable only stared for a few seconds.

“Goodnight Gihun,” he whispered in the dark.

Gihun’s smile widened a fraction, his heart warming at the beautiful sound that said his name.

He forced himself to turn around and go up the stairs. Forced himself to not smile like a fool until he was in his suite.

The moment the door closed, his heart opened. Smiling to the fullest.

And looking at the window, he could still see stars.

Chapter Text

Inho woke up feeling different than he usually did. Usually, he felt tired and already weighed down before he even faced the day but today was different.

Yesterday had been a rollercoaster.

And at the center of it all was Seong Gihun.

From being angry and fully in denial to being so

So charming…mesmerizing…

Inho thought about everything, seeing it in his mind like a film reel. Gihun had been so irritated in the morning. To the point of actually hurting him in a way. He didn’t think anyone’s words could ever hurt him or matter at all. But seeing Gihun so mad at him, hearing his words and the desperate attack within them had hurt.

But Inho knew that Gihun was just a man who was being challenged, with every new information, to doubt the life he knew. The man he knew.

The man he loved.

The thought made him frown at himself in the mirror but that was good. He had to remind himself. Because lately it was too easy to forget that.

There were instances where he wished he could completely ignore the fact that Gihun loved that man. Instances where it was easy to just pretend.

Instances like last night.

Gihun had looked so beautiful in the night. Giving him his smiles, with each smile more enchanting than the last.

He loved seeing the omega smile. It was a sight that relaxed him, intrigued him, made him feel like he did something right.

It made him feel like all was still well in the world.

It made him feel.

I felt

Gihun had said that last night and Inho thought he had misheard, but no, he hadn’t misheard the gentleness of his voice, the softness of his smile.

For the first time ever,

his heart had stopped.

Inho shook his head as he buttoned his shirt. Gihun was too kind, too gentle and empathetic. He just felt for him that’s all.

So why was a part of his mind telling him otherwise? Why did a voice whisper that the softness and warmth was just for him.

He cursed the part that wished that each beaming or shy smile was truly meant for him. Because how could he feel or even think about anything but his sister right now? How could he find himself thinking about Gihun before sleeping? Or when he sees a daisy on the ground, how can his first thought be of Seong Gihun and his scent?

Gihun was wonderful, kind and caring. Sharing his secret place, lending him a listening ear, helping him even with his silence, comforting him when it all became too much.

It wasn’t difficult to feel…

Feel something, he didn’t want to name.

But there were a million reasons why he should lock this away forever.

First the fact that he simply couldn’t afford to be distracted. Not by that beautiful smile that disarmed him. He had a mission, and nothing could stand in the way of it.

Second, the fact that Gihun was with the people he is sure had hurt his sister. According to the rules, to logic, they simply can’t be friends. Can’t be more.

But he said you were friends…

Inho frowned slightly at the thought that once things got too real, Gihun would no longer even be that anymore. Because at the end of the day, that was his family Inho was up against, and Gihun had told him that he would always protect his family.

Third, Gihun was an engaged man who loved his fiancé. Even if Inho found himself conflicted on whether Gihun truly loved Sangwoo, with the way he sometimes looked and plastered on a smile that never reached his eyes. It made Inho doubt sometimes if Gihun truly did love Sangwoo.

But then Gihun would fight and argue just to defend him like it was the only thing he could do, and it would make Inho think that he does love Sangwoo after all. It was confusing. But Inho refused to believe the delusions he felt in the night. He refused to misinterpret a smile given to a friend, an ally for something else it wasn’t. He wouldn’t fool himself.

Gihun didn’t feel the same confusing way he did. He couldn’t. It was almost impossible.

Almost.

But still too far out of reach.

So, suffice to say that although he did feel a certain way when he looked at Gihun, it would never be enough.

Although Gihun had looked at him in a way that took his breath away last night, he couldn’t be feeling more. Neither could Gihun, it was impossible.

He carried these thoughts along with him as he made his way to the kitchen to take some brunch orders, carrying them to the main hall. When he reached the table and placed the plates, he suddenly felt the weight of a gaze trained on him. When he looked up, he didn’t see anyone looking at him.

He repeated the motions and was placing down another order when he felt it again. He looked up and still didn’t see anyone staring.

Weird

He looked around at all tables and saw the table where Gihun sat with his family. He was looking at his plate and nodding while listening to his sister.

Inho looked away. It couldn’t have been Gihun anyway.

The fourth or fifth time he felt a gaze on him; he decided not to acknowledge it. To just act like he hadn’t noticed until he was in a position to look quickly and catch it.

He placed a drink on the table, lifting his head but keeping his eyes on the tray in hand, so that the person wouldn’t look away quickly.

He had a sudden urge, an inkling.

A feeling.

A part of him hoped it was true.

He went to stand next to a pillar, waiting for a guest to order something. His eyes went to look at the lobby, as though he was lost in thought looking at the exit.

He could still feel the gaze.

When he felt that he could look quick enough, having deceived the person staring into thinking he wasn’t paying attention, he snapped his gaze quickly.

To Gihun.

He was looking at him.

It had been him.

Gihun looked like a deer caught in headlights, looking away with his wide eyes like he’d been burnt.

Inho raised an eyebrow and stared at him.

He had been the one staring at him the whole last hour.

Inho’s lips formed a small barely there smirk that he couldn’t wipe off his face.

Gihun was positively red now. His eyes still big and guilty looking. Looking anywhere but at him now.

It was adorable.

His smirk grew a tiny bit more before looking over at the other tables.

God he was feeling smug now. Pleased that he had the omega’s attention. He had hoped it was him staring and damn it if it didn’t feed the fire in his chest telling him that he wasn’t alone in his feeling. That Gihun was there with him too.

It made his day a thousand times brighter.

and it was dangerous.

When he was stationed to cater to the guests in the veranda two hours later, he saw Gihun through the big glass doors walking around in the main hall, his eyes looking around carefully. Scanning every table and corner.

Looking like he was searching for something.

Inho turned his attention back to the guests and walked by one of the open glass doors to go to another guest when Gihun noticed him in the distance.

He just felt it.

Suddenly, Gihun was in the veranda, sitting there like it was the only place he wanted to be.

Like he didn’t need to search anymore.

Inho’s heart stopped beating again.

His lips quirked up in-spite of him as he forced himself not to stare at the omega who simply opened a book and started reading it like he wasn’t ruining Inho right now.

Like the simple act of looking for him everywhere inside and staying where he has finally found him wasn’t making Inho question his entire existence. Like it didn’t give Inho the feeling that Gihun simply wanted to be close by.

Close to him

Inho was beginning to feel that perhaps he had been wrong after all. Maybe Gihun didn’t love Sangwoo-

Speak of the devil.

He marched in, looking around like he had been looking for Gihun.

The irony…

Sangwoo went to stand by Gihun who looked up in surprise.

And not particularly the good kind.

Inho tried not to stare in between serving the guests, but was utterly failing. Sangwoo looked like he was asking Gihun to go somewhere with him, gesturing with his hand towards inside.

Inho felt an instinctual part of him fuming. He was never the type to let his alpha nature get a hold of him. He was always the prime example of how to control instincts. But watching Sangwoo close to Gihun made him want to yell. Attack. Growl for god’s sake.

What was happening to him?

He was about to look away in annoyance in an effort to save himself from publicly attacking someone he already very deeply disliked when he saw Gihun shake his head. Lifting the book slightly in his hands like it was an excuse, a shield.

Inho went to another guest when he saw Sangwoo walking back inside, looking dejected. He couldn’t stop himself from glancing at Gihun and found him looking back. A small hesitant smile on his face.

Inho’s heart stopped once more.

It felt so warm, so delightful.

Inho felt like Gihun had just chosen him. Had chosen to just sit in the vicinity of him with no expectations or words exchanged instead of going away with someone who’d dedicate all his attention to him.

Had made his choice like Inho’s glance was worth more than Sangwoo’s words.

Inho hesitantly showed a shadow of a smile.

Gihun’s eyes beamed.

And when Inho felt the warm gaze again half an hour later, he didn’t look up.

He already knew.

He knew that for one, Gihun didn’t care about the book in hand as much as he had pretended it did when he talked to Sangwoo. Because he was doing much more looking at him than reading the supposedly important book.

He also knew that Gihun had chosen him over Sangwoo in this moment. In such a small way that spoke volumes. The sheer willingness to waste a day sitting here with him close by rather than going somewhere new with Sangwoo.

He finally knew that his instincts that he had tried to ignore were right. Gihun wasn’t just being polite. Wasn’t simply being empathetic. Gihun must be feeling something too.

All the beautiful smiles and whispered words. The closeness and lingering glances.

The simple I felt that he now finally understood.

Now he knew.

And he didn’t know how to deal with it.

because even if it was true and Gihun felt something like he did, what could he do about it. 

Absolutely nothing.

and he needed a drink to deal with that.

Gihun felt like he was child at best.

Or a creep at worst.

He had just woken up with the strongest urge to see Inho again and spend more time with him. He was still tingling with lingering warmth of last night. So naturally, he couldn’t resist glancing at him across the hall.

He was just so handsome. Walking with such confidence and allure. Doing everything so carefully with the same unreadable face that had found a home in his dreams.

It was impossible not to stare.

When he got caught doing so, he was certain he could never look him in the eyes again. He thought that until he realized Inho’s eyes were like a flame to his moth.

Drawing him in like he had no choice.

Even when he tried to leave and hang out with others, it lingered in his thoughts.

He lingered.

After an hour or two, he’d miss him too much and he’d find himself drawn back to wherever Inho was.

Looking for him all around.

Still like a moth to a flame.

He’d only feel a certain warmth and sense of peace when Inho was around and although it drove him mad that they couldn’t speak, what drove him madder was not seeing Inho at all.

His presence and one single glance were enough to light up the whole sky with imaginary sparks.

When Sangwoo had showed up, Gihun tensed at the thought of how Inho might feel. He didn’t even regard his own dread first and instead thought about the moment Inho had seen him and Sangwoo kissing and how he’d walked away.

He didn’t want this to happen again.

He didn’t need to contemplate for a second about what he would do. Letting Sangwoo down and staying was not even a choice. It was the only way for him.

Why should he leave the sun and go inside?

He didn’t miss the disappointment on Sangwoo’s face and wondered whether Sangwoo also never misses his own disappointment and had just always chosen to ignore it.

Guess they were even now.

It was almost sad that the moment Sangwoo had walked away his head was only worried about Inho. Had he seen it? Did it bother him?

Why was a small, twisted part of him hoping that Inho would be jealous?

Jealous over him.

But it was just a small part that was clouded by the much bigger part that hoped that Inho wouldn’t walk away like last time.

And there he was.

He was still there and Gihun had to smile, hesitant, nervous but there.

A smile that he hoped would show that he wouldn’t leave.

He was here to stay.

Inho’s faint answering smile was everything.

Inho knew he had made plans after work, but he still walked down the familiar path. Just for a quick smoke without any expectations or hope of seeing Gihun.

Truly

He just felt so safe and comforted at the secret place and if that’s because of Gihun, well, that’s besides the point.

The sunset was absolutely beautiful when he got to the stairs. Orange, yellow and warm. But even so, it was missing a certain warmth in the air. He didn’t know how to describe it.

He went down the stairs and stood in front of the bench, lost in the tranquility. The small moment of peace where he could pretend that everything was fine. Ignore the fact that he hadn’t gotten any closer to finding her sister and ignore that it was getting to him in the last few days.

He didn’t know how to proceed after the detective had given him the simple order of observing everyone.

Like he hadn’t been doing it all on his own anyway…

What can he do? He can’t do anything. The idea of kidnapping Sangwoo and torturing him kept looking better and better.

No, he wouldn’t think of that piece of shit. Not in a beautiful place like this. Not in what became his safe harbour. Just as the thought reached his mind, he heard footsteps getting louder.

He looked behind him and saw Gihun coming down the stairs with an easy smile on his face.

All of a sudden there was the warmth he’d been missing.

“Hey,” Gihun greeted him with a small shy smile and Inho just nodded his hello with an even smaller smile.

He felt as though he couldn’t speak.

“What are you doing here? Something happened?” His smile faltered a bit at the thought.

Inho shook his head faintly. “No, nothing has happened since the detective told me to wait. I just wanted a quick break.”

Gihun relaxed, then tilted his head in this adorable way he had when he was curious or confused. “But aren’t you done with work today?” Inho raised his brow at that. Was Gihun really paying attention?

“Yeah, but I just-” how could he say that he just wanted some peace at the only place he felt safe enough to let his guard down in. Gihun’s place. “Just wanted some peace.” He glanced at Gihun and found him smiling all too knowingly.

“I get it. That’s how I feel about this place too,” he looked around the promenade fondly. “This place makes everything better. It has a certain charm to it and when the sunset is pretty like now, it’s too easy to lose yourself in it,” he said while looking at the sunset.

“You’re right,” Inho said while looking at him.

Because he felt that way about the place

And its owner.

When Gihun smiled, it felt like this sunset. Warm and beaming. Even when Gihun was mad, then he was a fierce storm he felt trapped in. But the most beautiful kind was when Gihun looked at him in the night and he could see stars reflected in his eyes.

He swallowed and looked away. He can’t keep doing this. He can’t lose himself in someone who was taken. Someone so far above him like the stars at night. Someone he still wasn’t completely sure felt the same way.

He cleared bis throat. “I need to go. Junho finishes his shift soon and I promised to go to Kim’s pub with him.”

He missed the disappointed glance thrown his way. “Oh. Sounds fun.”

“Not with a drunk Junho, no,” he said without missing a beat. Gihun laughed at his miserable tone. “But Junho’s so nice.”

Inho knew that Gihun really liked Junho. They had known each other since they were kids, and he was always so nice according to Gihun.

well, he was too nice for his own good that’s for sure.

Inho glanced at him and made a pained face. “Not when he starts losing it.”

Gihun laughed louder in the quiet place and Inho once again felt like he did something so incredibly right.

“Well, good luck then,” he teased, still chuckling.

Inho looked at him miserably again and started walking to the stairs.

“I’ll need it.”

He never sighed so deeply in his entire life.

“At least you’re happy this time around.” He looked at Junho who of course had gotten drunk as quickly as possible.

“Inho, I’m so happy. Noeul is much nicer to me now,” he said happily, drinking from the bottle meant for both of them. Of course, he doesn’t care and won’t leave anything for him.

“Wasn’t she just mad at you the other day?”

Junho gave him an annoyed frown. “No- well, yes. She’s nice again. Do you know-” he leaned closer over the table in secrecy. Like he was admitting something incredibly important. “She smiled at me! Such a big smile. You should’ve seen it.”

Oh god.

“Wow and you survived that?” He said plainly, not even meaning it as a question.

“Yes! Even though my heart was beating so fast…When I saw her smile at me, it just felt so good. Like everything was worth this moment.”

Inho looked at Junho and instead of throwing another sarcastic moment, he just nodded and looked away.

Because he knew what Junho meant. He knew it all too well. He felt that way whenever Gihun smiled at him. Big or small, it never mattered. He still felt the same warmth every single time.

“Do you think I should really ask her to go out with me tomorrow? Mr. Park kept telling me to do it but what if she doesn’t agree? How do I ask Hyung?” Junho gave him actual puppy eyes.

“What do you mean? Just go up to her and ask her if she wants to go out with you?” He was confused if Junho was asking because he’s drunk or whether he truly just didn’t know how to do it.

“But- but what if she doesn’t agree?” Junho was looking like a kicked puppy already. Like she had already told him that she doesn’t want to see him again.

Inho sighed again.

“Well, look at it this way. If she agrees, then good for you and if not, then she’ll be mad at you again for a few days. She always turns on you eventually.” Junho glared at him like he hated his guts.

“Don’t talk like that. She- is kind to me now.”

Inho shook his head. Truth be told, he doesn’t like Kang Noeul. Junho is blinded by his feelings that he can’t see the very obvious fact that she doesn’t love him at all. She needs him to play dad for her unborn child that’s all.

Inho had known from the get-go. Ever since he overheard Ms. Jang and her talking but even if he hadn’t he just knew that Junho wasn’t the kind of alpha to get an unmated omega pregnant without marriage and he also knew that Noeul could barely even tolerate Junho at times.

Still, when she started being nice and thankful to Junho for claiming the child as his, he thought that maybe she was finally at least seeing how desperate Junho was to simply make her happy. But then she started throwing fits at poor Junho. Switching between kind and grateful to angry and hateful.

It gave Junho whiplash and him a headache.

Still, he didn’t say any of this to Junho. The biggest and craziest reason was that he didn’t want to hurt his feelings. He cared about Junho enough to know that first of all, saying anything wouldn’t change his feelings for her. Second of all, it would only make Junho mad at him and he truly couldn’t afford that these days.

He saw it when Ms. Jang would try to talk sense into him. How he’d get so defensive of Noeul and only get mad at his mother for overstepping. If he thought that about his mother, then Inho knew he of all people didn’t have the right to intervene.

Not yet at least.

“Wait- what were we talking about again?” And Junho was completely drunk out of his mind. “Oh! it must have been about Noeul! You know that she smi-”

“Smiled at you yes,” he rubbed at his eyes tiredly. He was done with this.

“You know when she did, I just knew that she felt how much I loved her. She felt it.”

Inho paused at that. His head reminding him of the sentence that had haunted him all night and day. The one that he already knew would haunt him for a lifetime.

I felt

The words echoed in his mind like a melody he could never forget. Nor did he want to. Gihun looked so vulnerable when he said it. So hesitant but so sincere. It took his breath away. Gihun’s open words left too much room for him to imagine the meaning behind them. The meaning he wished was true.

“When will I get to feel it too,” he muttered absentmindedly.

“What did you just say? Don’t talk about Noeul like that,” Junho glared at him in warning. Inho only blinked in confusion. “No, I didn’t mean Noeul. I meant Gihun.”

Shit

Guess he was tipsy after all…

Junho frowned so hard that Inho thought he’d clench his face too tight and could never relax it again. “Seong Gihunssi?”

Inho looked away.

“How did you even-” he shook his head quickly “look, Gihunssi is very kind. He is incredibly kind to everyone around him. I know that better than anyone. I’ve seen it throughout my whole life. Don’t mistake that kindness for something it isn’t. He- he’s he’s Seong Gihun whose family owns us…He- he’s engaged. You can’t-”

“I know,” he said blankly. It actually really struck a chord hearing drunk Junho sound so serious, assuring him that everything was in his head. He made everything his instincts told him sound stupid. Naïve. And he was never a naïve person. 

If anything, hearing drunk Junho make sense made him only doubt his feelings more and more. 

Was he truly that desperate to distract himself that he was imagining that Gihun had feelings for him?

“You- what about Kim Youngmi? She obviously likes you. She keeps blushing like a schoolgirl when you’re standing in the same room. Man, when you talk to her, her eyes get so wide it’s funny at this point.”

Inho frowned, looking at Junho in silence. He had never noticed this. Okay, he had noticed that she was interested but not this much. She was just a girl who was a bit too young for him. Shy and very kind to everyone. She resembled Junho in many ways come to think of it. Both of them kind to a point that made them easy targets of getting taken advantage off. But all in all, he never even thought of her that way.

Wish he could’ve done that with Gihun.

He sighed again, deciding that this was enough time to spend with drunk Junho. Better leave before he starts crying about Noeul again.

before he starts doubting Gihun’s feelings even more.

“I’m going to go.”

Junho looked up at him, still drunk. “Wait, why? Weren’t we just talking about Noeul?”

Oh Junho…

Inho looked down at him and huffed an amused chuckle. “Sure buddy and you said you’d ask her tomorrow,” he smirked at the intoxicated idiot.

“But how do I ask?” He had the nerve to look stressed.

“Junho, I already told you that. Try to remember. I’ll go for a walk and will see you tomorrow. Unless you want to call it a day?” He raised one brow in question, already knowing the answer.

“No! I’ll stay. I need to celebrate Noeul being happy with me. I’ll remember what you said you’ll see,” he said determinedly, pointing a finger at Inho like it’s a bet.

A bet he’d definitely lose by the looks of it.

“Alright. See you tomorrow,” he said, looking unimpressed. He just wanted to annoy Junho. It’s too fun.

Too bad he was too drunk to even be annoyed by him.

Junho started humming some song off key when he left and Inho just shook head fondly.

Inho walked along the river, the moon lighting everything in its way. He lets his thoughts wander back to Junho’s words.

Gihun was a kind person. Way too kind to everyone, letting everyone bask in the warmth of his presence. From staff to even animals… Junho had told him that Gihun sometimes gets food from the kitchen just to go feed stray cats.

What would ever make someone like him special? Why would Gihun ever see him as anything but another project, another person to help? He got too lost in his smile to even think of how Gihun himself had it anyway, regardless of him. They were friends. He was helping him. That was that.

He shouldn’t let it linger. He should only think of what truly matters.

His sister

He kept walking for an hour just thinking about her until he circled back to the hotel. The entrance was only a few steps away when he heard, “Inho.”

He knew that voice far too well, causing him to turn around lightning quick towards the tree behind him.

Saebyeok

There she stood in a dark purple dress, her hair barely tied messily. She looked at him with a small smile.

The smile he had missed so very much.

“Saebyeok,” he breathed in surprise, in relief, saying her name like a prayer that had finally been heard.

He walked to her quickly, taking her in his arms and holding on like never before. Holding on like he was scared of ever letting go and he truly was. “You’re alive. You’re okay,” he repeated under his breath over and over, not feeling the small tear slipping further away.

“I’m okay, I promise.” She tried pulling back to look at him, but he wouldn’t have it. He couldn’t let go after weeks of fear and doubt. After the blood-filled uniform.

“Inho, what are you doing here?” She asked, her voice muffled by his shoulder. This made him reluctantly pull back.

He remembered that he needed answers. So many of them…

“What am I doing? What are you doing Saebyeok? How come I found your uniform with blood on it? Who hurt you and why?” He pulled back, looking at her with concern and a bit of anger.

Because his mind couldn’t forget that she was thief either.

She looked at him and pursed her lips. “Not here. Come with me,” she took his hand quickly and led him to an alley with nothing but trees. They walked for long minutes with no words uttered. She was determined not to speak yet and he…he was still shocked.

His sister was alive.

When they were far away from the hotel, walking by the river, she finally turned to him. Dropping his hand.

“Brother, you shouldn’t be here. If they find out who you are, they’ll kill you.” Now she was the worried one. Like he hadn’t nearly gotten crazy and killed someone over his fear of losing her.

“Who are they? Cho Sangwoo? Is it him who’d kill me like he did Ali?” He glared at her, seeing her eyes widen at how much he seemed to know.

“I didn’t want to involve Ali in all of it just like I don’t want you to be involved either,” she looked at him pointedly.

“Of course, I’ll be involved. I’m your brother!”

“You don’t get it. He’s dangerous Inho.”

“No, you don’t get it! I’ve been worried to death about you. Living each day with the thought that you were already dead. How do you think I felt finding your uniform? I wanted to kill him immediately!”

Saebyeok’s eyes softened. “Inho. You saw what they did to Ali. He had him killed without second thought. I can’t see this happening to you too.”

“Why Saebyeok? Why does he want you dead? It can’t be for what you two had,” he said, looking disgusted at the thought. Saebyeok however fell silent at that. Looking pale at the fact that he’d known about that.

“How do you know that?” She asked quietly, looking at her feet in embarrassment. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration and looked at her, looking more tired and frustrated than ever.

“Your diary. I found it.” Her eyes widened slightly before nodding once. He looked at her. Really looked at her. That was his little sister. She was alive in front of him. After every night where he drove himself crazy at the thought of losing her. He took a deep breath and decided to start over. To calm down because as long as she was with him, all would be fine.

“Tell me everything Saebyeok. From the beginning. Tell me how and why you were truly fired. Why he wants you dead. Where you disappeared off to. How Ali was involved. I need to know everything,” he looked at her pleadingly. Giving her the chance to finally be honest with him.

He was no longer the absent brother slipping away after a day or two. He was here to stay.

With her. The way he always should’ve.

She took a deep breath. Contemplating.

“Fine. Come, sit down.” They sat down on bench by the river, facing her.

“Look, I- I had been working there for years and everything I used to write you was true. I kept people at arm’s length, didn’t allow anyone to come close. To matter. Then over a year ago…”

She paused, looking away in humiliation.

In disgust.

“He. He started talking to me. Whenever I was cleaning in a suite, he’d come asking for something. At the beginning, I didn’t think anything of it. I knew who he was at the end of the day and knew that he was to be engaged to Seong Gihun.”

At the mention of Gihun’s engagement he looked away, his shoulders tensing. She didn’t notice.

“But then he started being nice. Kind. Giving me things and offering help and as much as I hate to say it, it felt good to have someone help. Have someone offering to be there without strings attached…. Or so I thought,” her face hardened, her scent turning sour with bitterness.

“He manipulated me Inho. Made me trust him. Fed me lies every single day until I believed him more than I believed myself. After months of depending on him, of letting down my guard, he let me get a promotion. Told me I earned it, and that it had nothing to do with how he felt and that it required nothing in return.” She took a shaky breath before continuing. “Again, I believed him. Around 10 months ago, he told me that he needed more money and told me about stealing the bottles and selling them to Kim.”

She looked at the ground in embarrassment and Inho wanted to hold her tight again but refrained from doing so. He simply waited for her to continue.

“I wanted to help him. He’d trained me to care about his needs more than my own. More than my morals…so I did it. I sold the bottles while he turned a blind eye at the inspections. I would give him the money and get some amount of it in return.”

That fucking asshole. That fucking piece of shit made her do his dirty work for him. Made her stoop low on his behalf. Inho wanted to punch something.

Well, someone very specific.

“Then about a month before I ‘got fired’,” she said it sarcastically. “I was told to take all the picture frames in the office to an old storage room because there were pictures of the late Mr Seong and Madame Seong didn’t wish to see them anymore. I was putting them away in the room when I thought of Seong Gihun. He’d loved his father very much and I felt bad for him not getting the chance to even say goodbye. So, I decided to take out some pictures of them together and give it to him when he came back. But one picture was in a silver frame, so I made sure to take it out so no one would accuse me of stealing. When I pulled the picture out, I… I found a letter stashed behind the picture. A letter that changed my life.”

Inho frowned. “What? What does it say?”

She looked at him coldly. “That letter threatens the ownership of the Grand Hotel. It’s the reason why I almost got killed. Why he wants me dead.”

“What? How?” His frown deepened. As far as he knew, Mr Seong had built the hotel from the ground up.

“Inho. I’m sorry but I can’t tell you,” She noticed him opening his mouth to speak and interrupted immediately. “And don’t argue with me. I won’t change my mind.”

Inho glared at her, but he unfortunately knew his sister well enough to know that she wouldn’t tell him. Always been the stubborn one.

“Then continue,” he said, still frowning at her.

“When I found it, I told him about it immediately. I was worried about his rights, the idiot that I was.” She sneered at the memory. “He wanted to see it immediately and told me to give it to him, saying it would be dangerous for me to keep it.” She chuckled bitterly. “Funny enough, I didn’t give it to him. Like a part of me already knew not to trust him. It drove him crazy that I wouldn’t give it to him. He’d try to manipulate me, telling me that I didn’t trust him. Then he’d try to sweet talk it and pretend that he was worried for my safety.”

She paused, taking in another deep breath.

“Although I didn’t give it to him, I- I still trusted him and believed how he’d told me that he didn’t love Seong Gihun and that he was only doing it because he needed the money.”

Inho bristled, thinking about how that son of a bitch could never deserve anything. Except for hell.

“So, I did something I never thought I’d do to get him out of it. Out of the marriage he convinced me he didn't want. I decided to blackmail Mrs Seong. Telling him to pass the message that I knew her secret and had the evidence to back it up and I even threatened that if she tried to do anything, I’d pass it along to the rightful owners. God I was so stupid. Believing that he wouldn’t tell her who I was. Believing he’d help me. Believing that I was doing it for us.”

Inho couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

His sister, his Saebyeok blackmailed the Seongs? For money? For him? How could this be his sister?

“I know. I know I was stupid, but Inho please know that I thought I was doing it for something that mattered,” she pleaded, looking at him like she could read his mind. Feel his disappointment.

He swallowed and remained silent.

“Then one day, I found my room completely torn apart and when I told him about it, he said that it must have been Madame Seong,” she huffed another bitter laugh. “He said that she didn’t buy the letter existing in the first place and when I asked what he had told her, he said that he wasn’t sure what to think either because he hadn’t seen it himself and that he feared that she would simply dismiss me as a liar.”

“Now I see it for what it was. Manipulation…when Madame Seong called me to her room, she threatened me to give back her things, but I didn’t let it go. I told her to give me money by New Year’s Eve or else I’d give it to the rightful person.”

Inho clenched his eyes shut. He was torn by the contradicting emotions in his mind. He loved her to death.

But God her actions disgusted him.

“I was writing you a letter that night when I heard footsteps. I stashed everything away where you found it and left the room to see a man in the distance. I knew immediately that my time was up. So, I ran and couldn’t find a single soul because everyone was busy upstairs with the New Year’s party.  I ran outside the hotel through the back exit, running down some stairs by the water when he caught up to me.”

She stopped talking, taking a deep breath.

“He stabbed me before throwing me in the river. No one heard me scream because of the celebrations.”

Inho hugged her again. It was stiff and in an awkward position, but he didn’t care. She was all alone, left to die in a cold river at night.

He hadn’t been there to protect her.

She relaxed in his arms like she used to do when they were young. He’d stroke her hair gently until she’d stop shaking. This time was no different except they hade changed entirely.

“Who did it? Did you see him? “

“No. He had his face covered.”

“What about Ali?” He pulled back from the hug and saw her eyes glisten for the first time that night.

“Ali saved me. He’d gone out for a smoke and saw me running and ran after us but lost sight of me. He was the only one who heard my scream. He jumped into the river, saved me, took me into his home and showed me Sangwoo’s true face. Because even after getting stabbed, I didn’t suspect him. I only thought it was Madame Seong and that he hadn’t known.”

Then she really looked at him and she never looked older.

“But Ali knew the truth because once he got me out of the river, he ran to get help and overheard Sangwoo talking to the man who attacked me. He was asking if I was dead and whether the letter had been with me.” She nodded slowly at her own words.

“He wanted me dead, and I finally knew him for what he was. A monster.”

Then, a single tear fell. “I spent months between life and death while Ali nursed me back to health. Not telling a single soul. He was so kind Inho. He was always so gentle and giving. He never asked for anything in return. He just cared about my health. Even when I decided to get revenge and to blackmail them for what they had done to me, he stood by me and protected me.”

“And he paid the price for it,” he said lowly. He couldn’t believe that her hatred had blinded her so much to the point where she wanted to sell someone else’s right in return for money.

causing an innocent man to die in the process.

Another tear fell from her eyes and Inho truly didn’t know what to do with it.

“I can’t believe that it’s my fault he’s gone.”

“And what are you waiting for? For them to kill you this time? Or kill me?”

She didn’t respond and only stared at a sky that was no longer dark.

“Saebyeok, we need to leave this place,” seeing her sudden blank stare he stood up. “Saebyeok if anything happens to you, I will die.”

Simple. Clear. And true.

He wouldn’t survive losing her.

“Don’t say that. Nothing will happen to either of us. But I wont leave until I get my revenge.” she said, standing up too.

Inho looked at her like she’d grown a second head. “What happened to you? Since when are you that bitter?”

“Since I got stabbed in the back Inho,” she argued back coldly.

“And yet you still want to continue?! Who else needs to die for you to stop?!” He couldn’t help his raised voice. He felt like he was trying to yell through a brick wall hoping to be heard on the other side. Hoping his little sister was still in there.

They stood in silence, staring each other down. Both feeling to win over the other’s stubbornness.

“Where are you staying?”

“In a hostel downtown.”

“Take me there so I know where it is. Then, I’ll go to the hotel one last time and when I’m done, I’ll come get you and we’ll leave this place forever. Understood?”

She only looked at him.

He sighed before hugging her again, feeling her own muffled sigh against his chest. He pulled back and took her by the hand, walking to wherever she was staying. The bright sun now shining over them as they walked.

He has to protect her.

Even if it meant protecting her from herself.

When they reached the hostel, she turned to him. “I’m sorry.”

He looked at her, tired and wary. “What for?”

“For everything. But most importantly, for hitting you in the head,” she looked at him guiltily.

“That was you? In Ali’s house?” After everything he’d heard all night, he still found it in him to be surprised.

“Yeah…I was there, and I didn’t know it was you. Sorry,” she looked almost sheepish.

“You couldn’t have waited for me turn around or better yet recognize your own brother?” He said dryly, giving her the biggest deadpan face he could.

She chuckled, the sound making his heart melt despite everything.

There she was. His little sister.  His only family. His biggest weakness.

He’d do anything to protect her.

Junho entered the main kitchen, looking around for Inho when he suddenly heard his name being called.

“Junho.” It was Gihun, walking down the stairs that connected the kitchen to the main hall. What was he doing here? The Seongs don’t go around to staff quarters. It wouldn’t be the first time Gihun came here but it was definitely odd this early in the morning.

Gihun even looked worried but hid it with a smile as he approached him.

“Good morning Gihunssi,” he greeted with a smile.

“Good morning,” Gihun barely smiled back. His eyes a tick to wide, his shoulders a bit more tense. Odd.

“Where’s Inho?” He whispered softly.

Oh

“I don’t know. We were out drinking, and he even left before me but when I woke up, his bed was still made,” he said quietly. Truth be told, he was concerned about it too.

But not nearly as concerned as Gihun looked.

Junho wasn’t a perceptive person but even he noticed how Gihun’s eyes widened at the second half of his sentence before swallowing and looking the way people did when they acted casual about something that definitely bothered them a lot.

“What? Does that mean he slept elsewhere,” he asked, his voice sharper than usual.

It really confused him how someone could look so casual and yet so on edge simultaneously.

It kind of scared him.

Gihunssi was never anything but cheerful and relaxed. Always an easy smile or a grin on his face. The only times he’d seen him so nervous, angry or worried like now was when it involved Inho.

Definitely odd.

He hesitated for a few seconds before answering. “…maybe?”

Gihun pursed his lips in a way that might have been meant as a smile but only scared him more. “Alright. If you see him, tell him I need him.” Gihun looked at him seriously until he nodded and then left quickly again.

Extremely odd.

He went to sit by Kang Noeul, finally asking her to go out with him for the day. As luck would have it, she was in a good mood and didn’t shoot him down. He was telling her about the great program he’d prepared for them when he heard his name again.

This time it was Inho.

He stood quickly and went to him. “Where have you been?”

He looked extremely tired. Like he hadn’t slept at all. He also looked like there was a huge burden on his shoulders. It looked bigger today than it had before.

“I’ll tell you later. Did anyone ask for me?”

“Yes. Mr Park. Oh, and Gihunssi.” At that Inho looked at him in small surprise and something else.

Perhaps sadness? Junho couldn’t tell. Again, he sucked at understanding people.

Before Inho could answer, Mr Park emerged from his office, calling for Youngil to come to his office.

Inho glanced at him one last time, almost saying something before going to Mr Park’s office.

What an odd day…

Gihun had gone to breakfast expecting things to be the way they always were. Junhee and Myunggi bickering. Mrs Kang annoying his mother with backhanded comments. Sangwoo saying some sweet nonsense he didn’t wish to hear.

And finally, seeing Inho walk around the hall with extreme focus and sharp eyes. Of all the things, that was the thing he longed to see the most. Just a quick glance at Inho.

A Quick look that would turn into two, then three and then a dozen because he couldn’t stop staring at him. He’d do it until he’d get caught by the object of all his focus. Just like yesterday.

But this time, he couldn’t find him. He looked throughout the hall and didn’t see Inho anywhere.

At first, he was just a bit disappointed that he wouldn’t be able to see him during breakfast, because Inho could’ve been assigned elsewhere. He was fine with it. He told himself he’ll go find him after breakfast.

But then breakfast passed, and he still couldn’t see him anywhere. He went to the veranda looking all around but still no trace of him. He started feeling weird right around that point.

He went upstairs to his suite before finding himself inching closer to the upstairs terraces.

No reason, just to check. To make sure.

Looking around, still no Inho.

He went back downstairs, his eyes snapping to any male staff member he comes across. Maybe it was Inho’s day off.

No need to worry. Even if he always worried about Inho.

He’s still here somewhere. He wouldn’t disappear out of nowhere.

Gihun decided that the only person who might know was Junho. So what if he went to the kitchen? He went there sometimes to get food for the cats, right? It wasn’t too weird.

Maybe Inho is there after all. Slept in late and had a late shift.

Then he found Junho.

It made everything worse.

Inho was gone? Had spent the night outside?

Where?

With whom?

He felt a surge of something ugly rise in his chest.

“Gihun, are you listening?” Junhee looked at him, confused.

“Huh? Yeah. Sorry. What are we talking about?” He looked at her sheepishly.

“About your fiancé treating my husband badly. He is butt hurt that Myunggi is his second in command and is letting it out on him. Tell him to know who he is talking to. Myunggi isn’t one of his workers. He is his equal. No, actually he is above him. The Lee family is too powerful for your fiancé to act above it.”

God Gihun didn’t care at all. He didn’t care about what Sangwoo did. As long as it wasn’t about his alleged murdering activities.

“Alright. I’ll talk to him. Excuse me,” he said, not waiting for her to answer. He wanted to leave.

He wanted a break.

He wanted to worry about Inho in peace, and he knew where to go to do that.

Gihun felt worried, sad and jealous all at once. His first thought is that something had happened to Inho. That worried him the most.  The last time he’d disappeared like that; he got hit in the head. He’d only been gone a few hours then. This time it was a whole night.

But Gihun also couldn’t help the other small part of him that was jealous. Jealous that Inho could’ve been spending the night with someone else. No. Inho wouldn’t do that. He refused to believe it. Because.

Because…

because Inho is too good to be doing that.

He almost thinks that the jealousy part came because he wishes to distract himself with an option that wouldn’t involve Inho being in danger.

Well, in that case he wouldn’t be in danger until Gihun got his hands on him. He’d tear him a new one.

No but he was really worried and even sad. Sad because his world feels dark when Inho wasn’t there. Man, he was definitely too far gone at this point.

He couldn’t think straight.

Gihun walked towards the stairs, his arms crossed. He was looking around lost, his eyes too blurry with worry to notice anything around him. He approached the stairs when he saw him.

Inho.

He was standing in front of the bench; his back turned to him.

Gihun’s frown eased into a relieved smile. Inho was alright.

His smile grew bigger and more excited as he practically ran down the stairs in a hurry to talk to him. He went down quickly, not even paying attention to the steps, choosing to keep his eyes on Inho as he walked. He only slowed down at the last step so he could take a deep breath before he started panting from excitement.

His smile was still beaming as he walked to Inho. “You’re alive after all,” he half teased. A part of him had meant it seriously but all was good if he was fine.

Inho turned around and actually smiled just as big.

It took his breath away. He’d never seen Inho smile so big. It was a lovely sight that made him look so different.

So…free.

“It’s not just me who’s alive. Saebyeok is too. I saw her,” he said with a big smile.

“What?! That’s amazing!” Gihun’s eyes and smile widened in happiness and before he knew what he was doing, he hugged Inho.

For the very first time.

His hands went around Inho’s neck as he chuckled happily. Inho took a few seconds before hugging back. His arms holding this waist tightly as he leaned his head against Gihun’s shoulder.

“She’s okay,” Inho whispered, his head buried slightly in the space between his shoulder and his neck, warming it up with his soft breath. Gihun loved the feeling of it against his skin immediately. He loved how it felt to be in Inho’s arms. To be surrounded by his scent, his breath and his warmth.

It felt so safe.

So warm.

So right.

He titled his head slightly to give Inho more space. To come closer. To lean his head completely into him. Lean into him.

Inho didn’t. But still, Gihun could feel the way his chest expanded as he took in his scent. Breathing it in like it was as vital as air.

He was on cloud nine.

He reluctantly pulled back to stare at Inho, his hands lingering on Inho’s upper chest. “Told you she is fine!” He beamed at how relieved Inho was. This was the happiness he always wanted to see on Inho’s face.

It was blinding.

And in this moment, he felt as though they were one. Because he felt Inho’s relief like it was his own.

“Yes. I still can’t believe it,” he said as he removed his hands from where they had lingered on Gihun’s waist.

Gihun dropped his own hands before holding on to one of Inho’s hands, squeezing it gently.

“See, you were wrong about the whole thing. Sangwoo isn’t a killer and this whole thing was just a misunderstanding,” he added with a teasing smile as he let go of Inho’s hand.

He needed to stop wanting his touch.

It was impossible though because now that he knew what it felt like to touch Inho so closely, he never wanted to stop.

Inho’s smile faltered at his words. Looking away from him.

Oh no

It suddenly felt cold, like all the happiness they just felt was about to disappear at Inho’s words.

“No, it wasn’t a misunderstanding…it was Sangwoo behind everything,” he confessed in a quiet low voice filled with anger.

Gihun’s smile dropped too.

“Everything we thought was true. He did trick my sister, telling her that he loved her and manipulating her into selling the drinks. He arranged for a man to have her killed at New Year’s Eve and he was the one behind Ali’s death as well.”

“That- that’s impossible? Why- why would he do all that? Don’t tell me he did all this because of their relationship. That doesn’t make any sense.” Gihun frowned at Inho who sighed, already knowing that this wouldn’t end well.

“No, he wants her dead for another reason.”

Inho took a deep breath, to prepare himself while Gihun took a deep breath to brace himself.

“Back when she used to work here, she found a letter stashed in a silver frame. A letter that apparently warrants her death.”

Gihun’s forehead furrowed in confusion. “What letter?”

“She didn’t tell me what was written in it, but she did say that the letter threatens your family’s ownership of the Grand Hotel,” he looked at Gihun in concern.

But Gihun only looked incredulous.

And then he started chuckling.

“Okay. That one is funny. What else did she say?” He voiced mid chuckle.

Inho’s frown deepened.

“She didn’t want to say how it does. But she said that she blackmailed…”

Inho suddenly paused, looking away for an uncomfortable second.

“Blackmailed Sangwoo for it. And he tried to kill her in return.”

Gihun chuckled again.

“Man, your sister is so creative. I don’t know how she comes up with these things. What’s next? Is Sangwoo going to be a secret vampire,” he chuckled again.

“Look, I know it’s difficult to understand-”

“No. No, no. You don’t understand how absurd this sounds. Inho, my father didn’t just own this hotel. He built it! He created it. There was never anyone else who could’ve owned it. So, whatever she’s saying, it’s just crazy. A lie,” he started getting angry at the audacity of the claim before he laughed at its absurdity again.

“You don’t want to believe-”

“Believe what Inho?” He smiled incredulously. “A masked man stabbing her at night? A secret letter stashed in a silver frame? And it threatens the ownership of the hotel my own father built? The question is how you can believe her insane stories?” He wasn’t angry. He was just…

Incredulous

Because as it turns out, Saebyeok was crazy.

Inho stared at him silently for a long moment. His face becoming unreadable and withdrawn the way it did when Gihun didn’t believe him.

Hurt.

Anger.

Disappointment.

It made his next words easier to say out loud.

“Well good thing that you’ll be rid of my sister’s insane stories.”

Gihun’s smile dropped as he looked back at Inho.

“I only came back to say goodbye, but I plan to take her today and leave this place for good.”

His heart stopped.

Inho was leaving?

Leaving him? Today?

He straightened his stance and closed his parted lips as he swallowed the sudden big lump in his throat.

“Leaving? Where- where will you go and when?” His voice was so small. He felt small.

“I’ll go get her from the hostel she’s staying in, and we’ll go anywhere far away from here,” Inho said calmly, his face still unreadable. Still carefully blank while Gihun was falling apart.

“But of course, I couldn’t go without saying goodbye and thanking you for everything you’ve done,” he smiled at him but if felt strained. Almost pained.

Gihun frowned deeply in sadness. In fear.

He was afraid. Inho was leaving? Right when he was about to fal-

“And I want you to know that you were the only reason I didn’t hurt Sangwoo.” He leaned his head closer to catch the eyes that were looking away in heartbreak. “You’re a thousand times better than him and he could never deserve you…He is a bad man. You just refuse to see it.” Inho held his gaze deeply for long moments.

Gihun swallowed again before looking away. His mind was overwhelmed, struggling to find a way out of this. To make this a bad possibility.

Not a reality.

Not the end.

“I- I- I don’t think you should leave so soon. I think you should stay until she gives you the letter. I- I need to see this letter myself. I need proof to believe all of this.” He shrugged his shoulders helplessly, his wide eyes barely containing the desperate truth behind his words.

He didn’t want Inho to leave.

To leave him.

Inho looked at him, a knowing glint in his eyes. Like he could see through his big eyes and casual words.

Like he knew

He looked away towards the water and simply nodded in acceptance while Gihun looked at the ground in sadness.

In defeat.

They didn’t say anything more and Gihun was the first to leave. He had to go to his room. Heading straight up there, barely holding himself together. He felt his eyes brimming with tears when he reached the hallway. But when he crossed the final corner, he ran straight into Sangwoo.

He immediately had his guard up, rubbing at his eyes quickly to get rid of the tears before they became too obvious.

“There you are love. I tried knocking on your door, but you weren’t there.”

Gihun tried to sound normal. “I just went for a walk.”

Apparently, he wasn’t doing a great job at hiding because Sangwoo looked worried.

“Is something wrong?”

God he must look like shit if Sangwoo is concerned enough to ask instead of just ignoring.

“No- I’m just tired.” He hated how his voice cracked slightly, sounding a bit higher that it used to be. Oh, he was so tired. He hated this day. He hated it with a passion.

Sangwoo was still looking worried.

“How about I treat you to some cold drinks?”

How about he just leaves him alone.

“I- I just need to do something in my room. Excuse me,” he walked quickly past Sangwoo and closed the door behind him before leaning against it heavily.

He started crying.

Why did it hurt so much? Why did his heart hurt?

He felt like he couldn’t breathe the moment Inho had said it. It felt like everything good was about to be taken away from him. The man he has feelings for was leaving him.

His hand went to his mouth to quieten his sobs.

Although they were quiet, it still echoed loudly in the empty room. They felt loud in his chest, tearing him apart from the inside.

He was just telling himself that he didn’t know what love felt like. That he wasn’t in love.

He still didn’t know what that feeling was, but he knew that it felt like a part of him would leave too. The thought of going on without Inho like he was never there, was impossible. He simply couldn’t and didn’t want to.

And what made it worse was that he could and would never hold it against Inho. He was protecting his sister. The very sister he did everything to find. How could he be angry when he’d wished that they could find her. He was so happy that he found her that he didn’t think of what it meant for him.

For them.

Because Gihun saw it in his eyes. He saw the knowingness, the sadness behind the mask of stoicism. He knew that Inho understood him. He knew that he let his stupid excuse of seeing the letter pass. He saw it in his eyes, that it was difficult for him too. It made him cry harder. Because despite the knowing, he could never go with them and Inho could never stay and jeopardize his sister’s life. There was only one dead end to their story.

It made him cry harder in the empty room.

“Saebyeok tell me where the letter is.” He sat in front of his sister in her room. Each one of them more annoyed than the other.

“I can’t believe you told Gihun about it,” she looked at him coldly. Inho frowned in slight surprise at the hostility coming from her towards Gihun of all people.

“Gihun has been helping me find you from the beginning. He had nothing to do with what they did to you. Also weren’t you the one writing about how nice he is?” He raised his brow in question while she raised hers in suspicion.

“Wow you really seem to care about him,” she sounded almost mocking.

It made him angrier.

“Yes, I do. He’d been nothing but kind to me and you said it yourself, he’s different from the rest of them. Besides, this concerns the Seongs, and he is the owner’s son. He deserves to know whatever that letter says.” He frowned when she looked at him numbly.

“Yes, I said that he isn’t like them. But he is one of them Inho. He grew up with the same mentality of ‘they’re better than us’ and are ’above us in every way.’”

A pause.

“So no, I won’t give it away for free. Not after everything I went through. Not after Ali died for it.”

Inho couldn’t believe how determined and bitter she has become.

“Saebyeok tell me where the letter is. You can forget your little revenge plan because I will be the one to stop you. I will make sure you don’t get anything done... and you know I’ll do anything to protect you even if I have to stand in your way. So, tell me now,” he looked at her warningly, leaning forward.

She paused, looking at him for long moments before sighing.

“Fine.”

Inho walked towards the abandoned storage room, making sure that no one saw him as he entered. He followed her instructions and opened the third drawer of one of the desks in the room. He took out the sharp letter opener he stole from Mr Park’s office and separated the layers between the wood and the velvet underlay. She told him that she stashed it here but when he removed the layer, he didn’t find anything. He looked around and even checked another drawer before realizing.

Saebyeok lied to him.

Inho took a deep breath and made his way back to hostel. He will lose his mind because of her.

But he had a bad feeling. His instincts told him that something was wrong. That if she lied, then she wouldn’t wait for him to come back and be angry with her.

He wished he was wrong but when he went to the reception of the hostel and asked for Saebyeok. He already knew what he would hear.

“Sorry sir, she left. But she left you a letter.”

Son of a-

She’d fooled him completely.

He took the letter and opened it quickly.

I’m sorry Inho. I know you will be angry, and I know you won’t understand but I promise you that I will make it right. I’ll reach out again when it’s time but for now I’ll disappear and please don’t worry about me and don’t try to find me either. Just know that I will reappear when it’s time for me to get what I want.

Then we’ll leave. You and me. And we’ll finally stick together, and it will be forever this time.

I love you brother.

Chapter Text

Inho went back to the hotel, putting his uniform numbly. He just wanted to get Gihun’s attention, and the only way was if he was wearing the very black and white suit he was growing to resent. It was around dinner time anyway, so he knew where to find the omega. He entered the hall and looked over to the Seongs. They all looked so happy.

So normal.

And it was at his sister’s expense.

Funny enough, the only one who wasn’t smiling or even really present was Gihun. He was completely zoned out, looking at his plate like it was his dying pet. Inho frowned at his sadness and wondered what Sangwoo could’ve possibly done this time to make Gihun that sad.

God, he wanted to kill that man. Now more than ever. Knowing what he had done to his sister, he couldn’t even look at him or else Sangwoo would be a dead man in the span of ten seconds no more.

But Gihun was more important now. He tried to stare and come close to the table, but Gihun wouldn’t look up. Even when his own mother spoke to him, he only nodded without looking up. Just as he was about to give up and simply wait for Gihun upstairs, he saw something odd happen.

Mrs Kang, who sat next to Gihun saw him staring and whispered something in Gihun’s ear with a subtle smirk.

That wasn’t the odd thing though. What was odd was how Gihun reacted.

He had barely moved when she leaned in to whisper. But whatever she said got him confused for a short moment before something else washed the sadness off his face.

Realization

He suddenly looked up, his big hopeful eyes scanning the room before falling on him and the way Gihun looked at him made his heart skip a beat.

He looked so relieved, so happy even though he contained it by barely lifting the corners of his mouth. Inho saw the happiness anyway.

It was in his eyes.

They were shining so bright.

Inho swallowed heavily and kept his gaze. He didn’t deserve this look. He didn’t deserve Gihun brightening up for him.

It was too beautiful for him to ever deserve it.

Inho subtly tilted his head towards the exit and left without waiting. When Gihun stared at him like that, it used to make him feel lighter. Happier.

Make his heart stop.

But now, he felt a small pinch of guilt rising in his chest when he got one of his beautiful smiles. Because he knew he couldn’t stay to cherish them. Even now, he was only here because Saebyeok wasn’t.

It felt unfair towards Gihun

To himself too.

He sat down on the bench and barely had to wait a few minutes when Gihun came down the stairs, a small smile on his face.

Inho stared at the water instead.

Gihun’s steps slowed as he came closer, noticing the sadness and worry radiating off him.

“Hey, what happened?” He whispered as he hesitantly sat down next to him.

Inho swallowed the suffocating feeling in his throat. “Saebyeok ran away.”

From me, he had wanted to say, but he truly couldn’t.

“What?” Gihun narrowed his eyes in confusion. That was probably not what he had expected.

Inho turned his head to look at him, his brows knitted in frustration. “She tricked me so I would leave her alone for a bit. It gave her enough time to run…She even wrote a letter saying that she doesn’t want to leave yet. Not before getting revenge or at least the price for the letter.” He couldn’t believe he was saying it out loud. That he was talking about his own sister. It pained him to speak of her actions at this point.

Gihun’s lips parted in surprise. “Are you saying she wants to blackmail my family? Again?” He said half angry, half incredulous.

Inho looked broken. Felt broken. It was too hard to even nod.

And Gihun noticed. Of course he did.

He closed his mouth and put a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently. “Hey. It will be okay. You’ll find her again. She’ll show up eventually.”

Inho’s frown deepened, looking at the ground.

“Why do I have the feeling that I wo-” his voice broke because he simply couldn’t say it.

“No. You will. She won’t leave you Inho. Just look for her the next few days. Junho and I will try to find places where she could be hiding. We’ll find her eventually,” he told him comfortingly, his hand still rubbing his shoulder.

The next few days were unsuccessful to say the least. Inho was driven mad with worry at this point.

He’d gone everywhere.

To all the hostels and hotels Junho knew of, to all the places she could’ve been hiding. Stations, shelters, cafes, restaurants.

Hospitals.

He’d gone to them, scared that something had happened to her. That Sangwoo caught wind that she was still alive and sent someone to finish the deed. The thought of everything being a threat to her at this very moment drove him crazy.

Junho was worried about him.

He could see the way he stared at him in silence when his mouth wouldn’t move. Wouldn’t respond. At some point, he had to wear scent blockers because he couldn’t even control his scent anymore. The sadness, the fear, the frustration, the worry all shined through in spite of him. If people from his past could see him now, they wouldn’t believe how weak he’d become.

Yes, weak.

Because Saebyeok, his sister, his weakness was out there in harm’s way, and he couldn’t stop it.

He felt as though he was tied up and was forced to wait and watch a tragedy unfold.

His sister’s tragedy.

He’d even gone to detective Jungbae to tell him that Saebyeok was alive. To get his help in finding her. The man was not happy. In fact, he was angry that Inho had wasted his time with a cold case that wasn’t a case to begin with. But even then, he reluctantly agreed to help with the search. Even if Inho had refrained from filling him in on the finer details. The letter, the blackmail and her involvement with Ali’s case.

He didn’t want to implicate her in any way. He knew too well how unfair the system could be. So instead of telling the detective everything, he spent his time wondering where she could be.

Or what her plan was.

How did she plan on blackmailing them again?

And he kept wondering whether he could even stop her.

His mind playing games of blame where it was either his turn or hers. Or Sangwoo’s.

He wanted that man dead.

But he didn’t, couldn’t do it. Because of Gihun.

And damn it if he didn’t hate himself for it.

“Gihun, there you are. I’ve been looking for you,” his mother beckoned him over to sit in front of her. Gihun smiled hesitantly before sitting down and looking at the river to his left. The terrace breeze gave him a sense of calm before he turned to speak.

“I took dad’s horse for a ride and lost track of time,” he said sheepishly.

His mother only looked curious, one brow raised in question. “Without telling Sangwoo?”

He looked around the terrace casually trying not to fall in her trap, knowing very well he would.

It was just a matter of time.

“Didn’t think of it,” he shrugged with a smile.

“You didn’t think of your fiancé?” She raised her eyebrows in disbelief. But her tone was teasing.

That gave him hope.

“No, it’s just that he doesn’t like horses or riding. Never has since we were young.” He shrugged and smiled again, hoping she’ll let it go. He doesn’t want to talk about his engagement these days.

For many reasons…

“Ah, I almost forgot,” she said suddenly, leaning forward to slide a list towards him on the table while he let out a breath he was holding. “Here’s the list of guests for Sangwoo’s masquerade party, check if there’s anyone you wish to add.”

Shit

He’d completely forgotten about that party.

He stared at the neatly folded list on the table, parting his lips slightly. Definitely looking like someone who’d just remembered. Still, he didn’t make a move towards the list, shrugging his shoulder again.

“If you forgot someone, I definitely won’t remember them,” he said humorously. But on the inside, he felt anything but humour.

Turns out she didn’t appreciate his attempt, just staring at him expectantly.

He sighed. “Alright, I’ll check it.”

“By the way, I prepared everything for Sangwoo’s gift,” her smile dropped slightly, looking pointedly. “Even though, I wish you would’ve taken care of that.”

Gihun looked at his lap for a second before giving her a tired smile. “I just didn’t know what to get him.”

She clasped her hands together and leaned forward. “All alphas want their love, their fiancé to take care of them. Especially,” she emphasized the word heavily. “When it’s someone who loves his fiancé as much as he loves you.”

Gihun swallowed heavily.

He hadn’t thought of Sangwoo’s party

Or gift

Or Sangwoo to begin with

How could he even think of a gift for a man he realized he didn’t know after all.

He still hasn’t forgotten the secrets. The lies. How could he focus on the parts of Sangwoo that call out to him and ignore or all the parts that scare him?

And how could he force his mind and heart to focus on Sangwoo when they were being pulled somewhere different?

To another man

He swallowed again and looked at her with a clipped smile. “I see he got your blessing again.”

She raised her brow in question.

“I mean, after the whole thing with assigning Myunggi as second in command, it just seemed like you two were at odds,” he said casually, looking at his lap again. He knew that whatever had caused a rift between his mother and Sangwoo had to do with Ali’s death. It started when he died.

He picked up on noticing more, observing more.

He picked up that habit from Inho.

“Did he complain to you?” Her voice was low, causing him to look up again.

And backtrack.

“No, no he didn’t. I just felt it. He never even talks about work with me.”

“And that’s a big mistake. Both you and your sister should know more about the business. Just because omegas of our standing aren’t allowed to work, doesn’t mean they can’t be involved. Nevermind Sangwoo and Myunggi. This is all for you and your sister. You can’t officially lead it but it’s still yours. Don’t forget that.”

“But they aren’t strangers.”

“It doesn’t matter who it is. Always be cautious and don’t let your guard down.”

Gihun was exhausted because this wasn’t a mother-son talk.It felt they were playing a game of chess. “So what? I’m supposed to marry someone I don’t trust?”

Like Sangwoo

She smirked and leaned back in her lounge chair. “One needs to always keep a distance between oneself and everyone else. Don’t love too much and don’t trust too much.”

He didn’t like this. He didn’t like how she always talked about love like it’s a weakness.

A transaction.

She always has.

But despite all of her efforts to ruin love for him, to teach him to be cold like her and to never love too much, he still turned out anything but that.

His father was always warm and loving. He taught him to be a dreamer and to believe in love.

To be an escapist.

To simply escape the world when it wished to take his happiness away from him. To protect every good part that wishes and dreams of a love that’s worth it. One that brightens up the sky.

But in the escapism, he also learned to avoid. To let his mother be.

Because she wouldn’t change.

So that’s why he smiles and stays silent, looking at the river.

And escaping.

It was past midnight, but he couldn’t sleep at all. He kept pacing around his suite, his head always on the verge of turning towards the open window and the soft white glow radiating from the moon. It illuminated half of his face either way.

Gihun had been walking around like a lost child for longer than half an hour by now. In his head a council debating his crazy urge and desire to do something risky.

He’d been toying with a certain idea for the last few days.

One that wouldn’t leave his head, no matter what he did to distract himself from it.

He wanted to ask Inho to go out with him

Tomorrow.

He knew it was risky on so many levels. They could be seen, it wasn’t good for either of them, not to mention that Inho would see right through him.

Inho would know

The alpha would have to be blind not to see how desperate he is to spend some time with him away from it all.

But God did he want it so much. It was driving him crazy, and it consumed his thoughts all day and night.

He wanted a day that belonged to them only. He wanted to see Inho in anything but that suit. He wanted to talk to him without a timer hanging over their head, forcing either of them to leave quickly. He wanted to go somewhere beautiful with him, to experience things together. To know him more. To get him out of the place that was slowly driving both of them insane.

There were so many reasons why the idea wouldn’t leave him. But to put it simply,

He wanted.

He wanted Inho.

Just them without any titles, classes, murders, mysteries, without Sangwoo.

But of course, he had been battling his rational part throughout the last few days. The one that arguing that it wasn’t wise. But its grip was slowly slipping away the longer he stared at the moon.

He wants this day, this time and chance with Inho more than he had wanted anything in a long time and he knew the steps he should take to make it happen.

Because he knew Inho was downstairs, doing maintenance by the lamps in the main hall. He’d snuck out a while ago to stand at the top of stairs, watching Inho bring in a ladder into the empty hall.

He had been alone too.

It was the perfect set up.

He was just checking.

And he definitely didn’t back out because he was a coward and didn’t know how to ask.

Okay he had, which resulted in his pacing.

But now, he knew he wanted to do it. He could feel the warmth of it already. The happiness. Besides, he would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that Inho almost leaving for good was a great factor for this urge. The thought of Inho leaving had caused him to spiral. Made him question all of his thoughts and feelings.

And he realized he wanted, no needed more time with him.

His instincts desired it.

He craved it.

He would do it. He would go and ask Inho to go out with him.

He wouldn’t label it.

He wouldn’t call it what it was

A date.

He walked down the stairs, his eyes scanning the hall and making sure it was empty before resting on Inho himself.

He was standing on the ladder, his hand inside of the lamp holder. His eyes were so focused on his task, slightly narrowed in concentration, his hands so steady, his body so still. Oh, and the strand of hair that fell away from its perfect spot, gracing the side of his head so nicely. It was beautiful in its mess.

Gihun almost tripped on the stairs.

Thankfully he didn’t, but it forced him to keep his eyes on the stairs.

Away from Inho.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he saw the moment Inho noticed him. He halted his hand’s movement in slight surprise before going down the ladder carefully, coming a bit closer.

Gihun took a deep breath and smiled as he inched closer as well. But not too close, leaving several steps between them.

For safekeeping

He can do this.

Inho, unreadable as always, just looked at him carefully. “Why are you still awake?”

Gihun, feeling like a shy kid, clasped both hands together in nervousness and shrugged faintly.

The way he did when he felt helpless.

Because damn it a part of him always felt helpless in front of Inho.

“I wanted to check up on you,” he said softly, still smiling. But that was too much. Too revealing. “Anything new?” Much better and more general.

Inho shook his head.

“No. I’ve looked everywhere but…no sign of her,” he sighed tiredly.

Gihun hated how tired and sad Inho was. It made his instincts yell at him, begging to comfort the alpha. It made him want to hug him again and feel him un-tense and melt all the stress away.

Maybe those instincts are what caused him to walk two steps closer.

“That’s what she wants Inho. She’s doing it on purpose,” he assured him with a soft smile. He knew from his own bond with Junhee how sisters can be the most stubborn creatures on earth when they wanted to.

“I know.”

He took another step closer.

“Then do as I said and tell detective Park Jungbae everything.”

Inho’s unreadable mask cracked slightly as he showed a glimpse of the helplessness inside. “I can’t. What if he connects her to Ali’s case? What if instead of finding her and taking her away to safety, I end up handing her to the police.”

Gihun looked at him, feeling dejected on his behalf. “Look Inho I- it’s hard for me to think with you about how to find the girl who is blackmailing my family.” Inho remained silent, his eyes piercing but still utterly unreadable. “But at the same time, it’s hard for me to know that she could be in danger and that there is something we could do but aren’t,” he shrugged and even lifted one hand in helplessness.

He paused before saying the next part, lowering his hand again. His eyes softening and no longer frowning in seriousness but instead in sadness.

“And it’s very hard for me to see you like this,” he murmured with a slightly cracked voice.

And took another step forward.

Inching closer and closer to him like a magnet.

“The fear I’m seeing in your eyes now is worse than it was when you hadn’t found her yet,” he whispered gently.

Drawn to the very same eyes he was talking about.

The eyes that were beginning to crack under pressure. The longer they looked back, the more weakness they started to show. “Every step I took to get closer to her only made her more out of reach from me,” Inho murmured quietly like it hurt to admit. “Every secret didn’t just implicate them; it implicated her too.” He leaned on one step of the ladder before sitting carefully and looking downcast.

Gihun’s broken feeling intensified at the sight of Inho. The strong man, collapsing from worry, from sadness.

“I used to be scared that they would hurt her.” He looked back up at him, no longer hiding behind the blank stare and instead shattering with the pressure of fear. “Now I’m scared she’ll hurt herself.”

Gihun swallowed the tightness in his throat away and lowered his head to really stare at Inho. “Are you worried about Saebyeok or are you worried that you’ll discover a new secret you’re not ready for?” He teased gently, even smirking and tilting his head slightly in a challenging way to hide his true motives.

To comfort him.

To lighten the darkness in his eyes.

Inho huffed in amusement, looking away to hide that Gihun’s effort had worked.

He smirked wider.

“Are there still bad things we’ll have to discover?” He looked back at him, half joking and half all too serious.

“Probably. But despite everything you’ve discovered so far, you’ve always remained strong and didn’t let anything stop you.” Gihun looked at him determinedly.

And boy was he determined to remind Inho of how strong he is.

“So don’t let anything stop you now,” he smiled again in encouragement.

Inho watched him for a short moment. Intensely. Like he wasn’t just deciphering a code but also looking at a source of light at the end of a long tunnel.

“Pretty sure the only reason why I haven’t lost my mind yet is you,” he murmured quietly, still staring at him like that.

Gihun’s chest stopped still. Not just heart, no, his entire chest.

Inho stood back up and took one step closer, almost closing the gap between them.

Just one painful step that Gihun was acutely aware of.

“I don’t know how to ever thank you…for everything,” he whispered, still holding his gaze like it was a trap.

The most beautiful trap he’s ever been in.

His chest was still frozen before it suddenly felt heavier. Heavier with the sudden pressure of crushing happiness, the kind that makes the heart clench tightly. Only it was his whole chest.

His lips stretched into a big yet somehow shy smile.

His hands held each other tighter like they could calm him down and ground him.

His eyes were all over the place except for the place where they longed to look at the most.

He couldn’t handle that look but he forced himself to look again.

It was still there, that soft knowing spark in Inho’s eyes that made him lose his sleep. He had to leave, or he’ll take one more step forward and then-

“Then don’t thank me,” he whispered back. Shrugging faintly again while still smiling before turning slowly to head back upstairs. Every step he took made him realize how close he had been. It took his breath away all over again, consuming his mind with the most addicting kind of haze before he stopped abruptly.

The date

No

The outing

He had completely forgotten it. He stood for a few seconds in doubt before turning back towards Inho and finding him still waiting in the same spot.

Inho hadn’t moved at all.

Still standing there, still looking, still waiting.

The glint still ever so present in his eyes.

Clutching his own hands tightly, Gihun walked back one step. His eyes now wide in nervousness.

Excitement.

Worry.

“Is tomorrow your free day?” He asked softly. Already knowing the answer.

He’d asked Junho like the creep he was. Thank goodness that Junho had only looked confused for a few seconds before letting it go with a smile.

“Yes.”

Gihun’s smile widened a fraction before nervousness pulled it again like a tide. “Cause I wanted to go downtown tomorrow for a few errands, annnddd I- I didn’t want to go alone.” He frowned dramatically, acting like this was a very casual, last-minute thought.

Not a rehearsed speech he’d worked on for days.

And what a fine job he was doing.

“And Junhee of course can’t come because of her pregnancy. She can’t move around a lot like back then.”

God he was rambling like an idiot.

Because Inho wasn’t saying anything.

At all.

He was frozen, lips slightly parted. But it wasn’t in an overtly shocked way. It looked more intense. His eyes darker with something he couldn’t dare to even address.

He looked like he knew but was still surprised.

He looked-

Like he wanted to close the distance between them.

This time for good.

It made him want to faint. But still, he focused more on the silence that sent him spiralling into madness.

Into utter nervousness and when he was too nervous, he talked.

Too much.

“And- and you haven’t even seen the town properly since you’ve come here,” he shrugged again with a very nervous yet big smile. Because he is failing miserably at hiding his fears, so instead he’ll just look like a fool. In his head a mantra of whether Inho would even agree. If he is revealing too much. Oh god what if Inho doesn’t want to come.

He is sure he will continue to ramble until Inho showed mercy.

Pitiful.

“And I’m sure that if you stay here, you’ll only drive yourself mad and it will-”

“I’ll be ready from dawn.” Finally came the answer that shut him up, halting him like a caught child trying to justify himself. The answer was softly spoken in the dimmed space. But despite the dark he could see it lighting up the room.

Inho’s smile.

It was beautiful. Soft, sweet, and all too knowing.

He closed his mouth with smile that he knew was too big, too happy.

But he couldn’t help it.

Because he knew. They both knew that his dumb excuses didn’t even slightly conceal his true intentions. His true feelings.

Standing in this big hall, Inho surely must know that he desperately wanted to spend time with him somewhere else where they can be themselves.

And now he also knew that Inho wanted to be there just as much as he did.

He could feel something change between them in that very moment.

They both felt it.

Gihun’s heart skipped another beat, struggling to breath from the warm pressure in his chest. He couldn’t speak or even open his mouth.

His big smile was sealed on for the night.

So, he took one last look at Inho whose smile was fainter now, but his eyes- darker with a shade of

Want.

Gihun swallowed, feeling warmer. Not only was his face crimson but his entire body felt on fire just after a small glimpse into Inho’s eyes and what’s calling out to him within them. He forced himself to turn to the stairs. He had to leave because for one, he couldn’t handle Inho’s gaze for one more second and the other reason was that he couldn’t wait to wake up again.

But as he walked up the stairs, he could feel the heated gaze on him every step of the way.

Oh he couldn’t wait for tomorrow.

The moment the sun started shining was the moment Gihun sprang out of bed. He had a quick shower and even changed quickly. Well, that was because he’d spent half an hour checking his closet before going to sleep. Precisely to save time now.

Time was very valuable today and he wouldn’t waste a single second.

He was the first to sit down for breakfast, surprising Junhee and even his mother. He was usually the last one there.

No, Sangwoo was. Because Sangwoo was always doing something for work before sitting down at the table. Nonetheless it got him a few looks but thankfully nothing else. They knew that he wanted to go out today.

The first time since he’d been back.

It’s sad when he thinks about it that way but today wasn’t the day to dwell on it. Because today, he’d spend the whole day with Inho.

The thought of the alpha made him look around absentmindedly, eyes scanning every server until it clicked to him that Inho wouldn’t be working today. Gihun wanted to laugh at the small stupid, selfish part that was sad he wouldn’t get to look at him during breakfast, forgetting the fact that he had the whole day to do that.

The thought made him giddy.

“Gihun, I’m sorry I had to postpone our trip. But I’ll check the calendar and we’ll go soon, okay?” Gihun looked at Sangwoo, who sat next to him and simply smiled.

A routine he’d trained for by now.

“It’s fine, I know you’re busy,” he replied calmly. Refraining from saying anything about today because he never knew when Sangwoo wanted to hijack his plans.

Not today.

The moment he finished breakfast, he said his goodbyes and hurried to leave the table. He hoped Inho was ready by now. He had realized earlier that he hadn’t made any plans on how to meet with Inho.

But he had a feeling.

An instinct that told him that Inho was waiting for him at the secret place. It was simply put a pull he felt.

Sure enough, the moment he got to the stairs he saw Inho staring up at him.

He had been waiting and it warmed his heart further.

“Good morning,” Inho said as he went up the stairs.

Gihun took his time to answer. Because Inho was stunning.

His hair so perfectly styled, his eyes ever so deep in their color and mystery. Wearing a dark navy coat that made him look more mysterious that he already did.

Gorgeous

He was gorgeous

“Are you alright?” Inho’s small smile faltered as concern took over.

Idiot, he’d daydreamed about him right in front of him.

“Uh yeah- good morning. Glad you knew to come here first,” he said sheepishly, looking anywhere but at Inho now. His face was getting hotter by the second.

“Of course.”

That’s it? Like it was the most natural thing in the world to have read his mind. The short response got him to look back at Inho only to find him looking back unreadably.

Observing

Analyzing

Knowing

Gihun looked away again.

“Alright so, uh- there is um a place I’d like to go to,” he stammered quietly, starting to squirm slightly from nervousness.

“As you wish,” came the soft reply. A certainty said so sweetly.

Gihun looked at him again.

That- that little-

He must know what he’s doing. Saying this and saying it like that and looking like that.

Giving him this small smile that knew too much. A smile that threatened his entire being and everything he thought he knew.

A smile he couldn’t resist smiling back at.

“Great. I’ll take the car and I’ll meet you at the central station. I’ll pick you up there okay?” He felt bad for Inho having to walk to the station first but they both knew that no one could see them together.

“Of course, I’ll go now,” Inho nodded and started walking away before turning around again. “See you soon.” Another smile.

Another heart attack.

“See you soon,” he whispered back and watched him go with a stupid smile on his face.

“And we’re here,” he said happily, turning off the car and turning excitedly towards Inho for a few seconds before hopping out the car and looking at the beautiful greenery all around them.

He knew he’d said he needed to run some errands.

But that was a big lie that both of them were aware of.

No need to bring it up.

Not until they had to return.

Inho got out of the car, looking at the giant trees everywhere and how the sunlight fought its way to go underneath them. His gaze scanning every single tree and batches of wildflowers with an edge of softness he hadn’t seen at the grand hotel.

“It gets better when we get to the river. Come with me,” he smiled and started walking ahead on the big path between the trees. His excitement to revisit this place made him miss the small smile aimed at him from behind.

He was so giddy to be back here again which was something unexpected.

Because the irony and perhaps the craziness was that he had dreaded coming to this place when he’d first arrived. It held too many memories with his dad. Reminders of a person who was no longer there and reminders of a life he knew he no longer fit into. It even felt scary to go back and face the version of himself he’d left behind. The shame of no longer being that person was too haunting, even at the hotel.

But now?

Everything has changed.

Because of him.

Gihun glanced at Inho who was still looking at their surroundings. The sheer wonder, no, the tranquility on Inho’s face made him smile.

Him

It was him. He is what made coming here easy.

Because just like he made space for himself in the secret place, Gihun wanted him to make space here too. He suddenly didn’t look at this place and thought of everything he wasn’t but instead of everything this place was. Every beautiful vibrant flower, every shimmer of the water as it gleamed red in the sunlight. Every happy feeling he ever felt here. He wanted Inho to feel it too.

Because he wants Inho to be happy.

They walked in silence until they finally got there.

“It’s…beautiful here,” Inho said almost breathlessly. Gihun merely nodded with a big smile as he looked over his favorite- no, second most favorite place.

The trees gave way to a nearly endless looking field filled with all kinds of small wildflowers, bathing in the golden sunlight, making them shine brighter in their colors and ahead on the right was the stream channel of the river, surely enough shining a certain shade of red. The birds and the soft movement of the water, the only indication of this not being a beautiful painting frozen in time.

There were no humans, no traffic, no obligations or facades.

Just nature and them.

They walked among the flowers until they reached the grass by the riverbank, each of them taking in the peaceful quiet. Completely unlike the Grand.

They started walking along the stream.

“Is this the second secret place?”

Gihun had to laugh at Inho’s serious tone. “No, but my dad and l discovered this place together.”

Inho glanced at him, “and your mother didn’t come with you?”

“She did once. She hated the bugs and vowed never to come here again,” Gihun chuckled at the memory.

“How about Sangwoo?” Inho sounded a bit awkward and it made a distant part of him stiffen slightly. “What about him?”

“Did he come here as well?” Gihun couldn’t help but admire how evenly Inho sounded, not showing any trace of his hatred towards Sangwoo. Maybe it was the beauty of this place that easily disarmed people.

“No, he came to live with us later.” Gihun didn’t want to talk about him anymore. It wasn’t only just because of Inho being with him, it was also that this place just didn’t work for Sangwoo. He was everything that this place wasn’t and Gihun knew he wouldn’t like it here. Although he was sure he’d pretend to.

The thought of knowing Sangwoo made another thought jump up in his mind. A fact he couldn’t stop thinking about.

How little he knows about Hwang Inho.

“May I ask you something?” He couldn’t help the way his voice went higher in nervousness. Scratch that, it was feigned casualness.

Inho only glanced back and smiled faintly, “you can ask me anything.”

Damn him.

“Before you came here… where were you? What were you doing?”

“Doing?” Inho tilted his head in confusion.

“Yeah, where were you working as an accountant?”

And the more important pressing question that kept pounding in his head.

“Were you engaged or in a relationship?”

Subtle. Very subtle, great job.

Inho raised one brow at him—a look he carefully avoided as he stared innocently at the ground—and walked ahead.

“I was working as an accountant for a big farm until the owners had a falling out. After that I didn’t have a stable job.” They walked ahead until they almost reached the sandy part by the stream, a small beach that children went to play in, only now it was empty.

They walked towards it and as they went to cross the rocks filled part in front of them, Gihun almost tripped before a hand gripped his arm tightly.

“May I?” Gihun looked confused until he looked down and saw Inho’s hand now no longer holding him but instead being held out for him to take.

His lips parted slightly, staring for a few seconds. Not daring to look back up at Inho and confirm everything that is too obvious in his eyes.

He took his hand.

Inho’s hand was big, enveloping his in warmth and causing a tingling feeling that stretched from his hand to his head. He let the steady hand guide him on the rocks, his head trying not to overthink the fact that he was out here, no one in sight, with Inho holding his hand like it was the easiest thing in the world. His heart was positively about to explode if he kept thinking about it.

“What was the second question?” He heard the feigned ignorance and it made him glance at Inho and see the flicker of a smirk on his face.

Damn him he knew.

He knew exactly what the question had been and he knew exactly that this would only make him blush harder.

“No it was a general question you know. I didn’t mean anything specific,” he echoed Inho’s feigned ignorance and shrugged, avoiding Inho’s gaze.

Because he was a damn liar.

Inho huffed a small, amused chuckle.

And they both knew it.

“Tell you the truth, I didn’t love being an accountant at the farm. I was good at it and it was stable, but I…wanted a small piece of land of my own so that Saebyeok could come live with me.”

Gihun smiled at the image of Inho owning a small farm somewhere peaceful, like here.

“As for the other question,” Gihun’s eyes widened in alert at Inho’s amused tone, “no, I was never engaged.”

Gihun hoped his smile wasn’t too obvious. The small instinctual part in him feeling way too satisfied and happy.

“There was something, but it didn’t last.”

Well, now he wasn’t smiling anymore anyway, trying to silence the irrational animal part that felt entitled to the man holding his hand. He tried to swallow the foreign feeling of possessiveness down.

“May I know why?”

“Told you, you can ask me anything.” Inho glanced at him with a small smile and his heart fell deeper at how open and certain he was in his honesty. How he offered it to him like it was his to begin with.

Inho guided him to a big flat rock, holding his hand gently until he sat down.

The moment Inho’s hand stopped holding his, he felt the emptiness immediately. It had felt so right to hold Inho’s hand. Like it was meant to be holding him all along.

It felt so right to walk with him side by side and hold hands.

Like it was meant to be.

Inho sat down next to him and the feeling of missing his touch quieted down.

“He didn’t love me as much as I loved him.”

Him?

Deep breaths, it’s in the past.

“He loved himself more and I knew that, but I accepted it because I felt like I loved him.”

He loved him.

Past tense. Calm down.

How was he only just feeling jealousy now for the very first time in his life?

Gihun tried not to frown at Inho, his mind a mantra reminding his omega part that this was just a past thing.

God if he felt jealous of someone who was no longer there, then how did Inho feel about his eng-

No, Inho didn’t feel this way about him. Just because Gihun felt like Inho knew about his own feelings, doesn’t mean that Inho himself shared the same feelings.

Right?

“I thought it could change over time, but it only got worse. So we didn’t continue,” Inho trailed off and looked away for the first time, preferring to stare at the water in front of them.

Gihun pursed his lips and nodded, “love is so complicated.”

“No it really isn’t Gihun,” Inho looked back at him and shook his head. “Everything else is. Like envy and hatred.” Gihun smiled at him and just listened. Listen to Inho talk about love.

His new favourite thing

“All of the things that stand in the way. But love itself…” he smiled back, “it’s as clear as day. When it reaches you, you’ll feel it…and when it’s real,” his smile widened and Gihun could swear his eyes were sparkling, “you’ll see it immediately.” Inho’s smile was beaming as the sun and he couldn’t look away.

All he could do was smile back just as brightly until it became too hard to breathe, until he had to look down at his lap in giddiness.

Maybe he was wrong after all.

Time flew in a glimpse.

They spent the whole day walking and talking about everything and nothing. The sound of Inho’s voice in the calming nature was a melody he could never unhear. One he wanted to keep listening to forever.

They were walking back towards the car—while taking a different road. Preferring to walk by the stream until they had to go into the forest— when Inho suddenly stopped.

“Inho?” He watched the alpha get closer a field of daisies, approaching it slowly in an almost careful way before crouching in front of something.

He followed the alpha until he saw it.

An orange tabby lying in the middle of the field, his paws playfully tasseling some daisies.

It was adorable.

“He’s so cute,” he whispered as he crouched down next to Inho and felt him nodding faintly.

“He reminds me of you, you know.” Gihun blinked in surprise as he stared at Inho’s faint smirk.

“Me?”

“Yeah.”

“How-”

“You smell like daisies.”

Gihun’s eyes widened as he stared at Inho who looked completely at ease, smiling faintly at the tabby. Looking the most peaceful he has ever been. Like he hadn’t just completely short circuited his brain.

Daisies?

“How did you- people say I smell like jasmines,” he mumbled quietly, almost dazed because only very few people noticed daisies on him.

This got Inho to look at him, tilting his head in confusion. “Don’t you know that you smell like daisies?”

Gihun still looked like a fish out of water, completely baffled.

“I do but most don’t notice it. Jasmine is more apparent… I didn’t expect you to notice,” he whispered, still looking at Inho.

“Oh.”

“Well, I did. From the first night we met actually.”

Gihun’s lips parted more, his heart beating way too fast.

And then,

“It suits you. It’s subtle at first that’s true but when you notice it, it becomes impossible to ignore. Daises are so light and uplifting and have this sweet note that makes everything better.”

His heart stopped.

They stared at one another, the sunlight shining over half of their faces, and no one breathing. Just staring into each other’s eyes, each lost in what has been said.

The tabby meowed, interrupting them.

Gihun looked away when he felt the cat come up to him, brushing his head against his leg.

“Aw, hey little one,” he rubbed his head gently. “Inho look at him, he’s gorgeous.”

Inho stared at them with a soft smile until Gihun noticed, his smile faltering due to shyness. “We should leave. It’s getting late,” he said with a small smile.

“Alright, we’ll go back the same way,” Inho said while nodding faintly, “even though I don’t really want to leave,” he smirked lightly and Gihun’s heart stopped again.

He stared at the tabby so that he wouldn’t lose himself in Inho’s eyes again. If he saw how the sunlight made them a beautiful shade of warm brown, he wouldn’t leave this place.

“Wait one second and don’t look,” Inho said quickly before standing up, leaving Gihun to stare after him before remembering not to look.

What was he up to?

He busied himself by playing with the tabby, picking up a daisy and letting him try to catch it. He was laughing at the cat’s antics when Inho’s hand was suddenly holding out a daisy bouquet in front of him. Many daisies picked carefully and put together so seamlessly.

It was the most beautiful bouquet he’d ever gotten.

Gihun’s mouth dropped at the sight of it before looking up at Inho who simply smiled.

“Thank you,” Inho whispered.

So vulnerably said and so sincere that it took him aback, closing his mouth and swallowing from the overload of emotions running through his body. His heart.

“What for?” He asked almost breathlessly, his hands reaching out to take the flowers, gently touching Inho’s hands in the process.

And suddenly lightning struck inside him, the flowers, the sunlight, the smile, the heartfelt confessions, the daisies…

It felt like lov-

“Well as Kang Daeho, thank you for letting me into your secret place.” Gihun chuckled as both of them still held onto the flowers, fingers touching. “As Oh Youngil, thank you for ignoring my mistakes at work.” They both laughed at that until Inho’s laugh softened into a smile. “And as me, I could never thank you enough for everything you’ve done…for the first time since I’ve been here, I finally feel peaceful. I was always worried and couldn’t sleep…but… when I’m with you, I’m at peace.”

Gihun could only grin at Inho, because felt the same exact way about him and it made him beam in the feeling of it, in the knowing.

Inho’s hands dropped away from the flowers but one remained in the air, offering to hoist him up.

Gihun took it without hesitation, still beaming and they walked together down the path, each surer in their feeling.

And as the sun set, Gihun held the flowers tighter, grinning giddily at them every time while Inho watched him with a smile of his own.

Gihun looked at how the sun made the flowers seem golden and knew in that moment that he finally had a favorite flower.

When they went back to the hotel, Gihun made sure to head up to his room as quickly as possible before anyone could see his flowers.

No one can see them but him.

After placing them in a vase and looking at them with a beaming smile, he heard a knock on the door.

Sangwoo

“Hey, I was looking for you.”

“Sorry, I lost track of time,” he said with a sheepish smile.

“I should’ve gone with you,” he looked apologetic.

“No, it’s fine, besides, I went to pick up the fit for your party. Best for you not to see it yet.” He cringed at his own words. Typical things to say when one was an omega. Omegas could only have certain interests such as fashion and household hobbies after all. How he hated pretending that that was all he was about. Like he hadn’t gotten a freaking degree he had worked hard for.

Figures that it worked on Sangwoo who brightened at the mention of his party.

“They say that about weddings you know,” he grinned.

Gihun almost choked.

“It’s just words anyway,” he attempted to laugh it off.

Please let it go, he thought.

“No, I think it’s good you mentioned it.”

“What?”

“Weddings. Our wedding Gihun, I think we should set a wedding date.”

Gihun wanted to throw up.

Why today?

“I think there are too many preparations for us to pick a date so quickly-”

“No. All of these preparations can be done in a month. And it would be good for the work schedule, for us to have a honeymoon before New Year’s Eve.”

He took a deep breath before smiling, finding difficulty to fake it after a whole day of not doing so.

How he almost got used to it.

“I don’t think we should rush the wedding because of your work schedule don’t you think?” He made sure to smile, to pass it off as humor. “I think we should wait for your work rush to be done and then have it done properly.”

Sangwoo’s smile faltered. “You want to wait six months?”

“Why are you in such a hurry?!” He couldn’t help the defensive edge in his voice. The tension was palpable, each on the edge of arguing for their cause when

“There you are,” Myunggi suddenly approached them looking at Sangwoo before halting as though feeling the tension.

“Uh- apologies. We can talk later.”

“No, it’s fine. You two have work to do. We’re done here anyway,” he gave them a strained smile, ignoring the way Sangwoo looked saddened and bothered.

“Well, we’ll finish up quickly and then have dinner together, right?” Myunggi asked tentatively.

“No, I don’t think so. I was out all day and I’m tired,” he gave Myunggi a smile before glancing back at Sangwoo, “I’ll sleep early.”

Myunggi looked at him imploringly before nodding and asking Sangwoo to come. Gihun stared at the ground with a faint trained smile until he felt them leave the corridor.

He could breathe again.

But Sangwoo’s final sad glance stayed with him all night.

“This isn’t going to work Inho.”

Inho sighed deeply before looking back at Junho. “What’s not going to work?”

Junho looked at him pointedly from his bed, “what’s in your head. It wont work. You know exactly that it wont work.”

“All this because I took him somewhere we can talk without getting caught? You know it’s a hassle to talk here.”

“Oh so you want to tell me that you spent the whole day talking about Saebyeok?” Junho gave him one of his best bitch faces yet and Inho looked away in annoyance.

He can’t deal with this now.

Why today?

“Are you going to get mad at me for telling you the truth? Hyung I’m worried about you. And I told you a hundred times already that Gihunssi is kind. Unbelievably kind and empathetic and always has been.”

Inho remained quiet, hoping that Junho drops it and stops ruining an actual good day.

“Inho you have to see the differences between you two-”

Fine so be it.

“Let me continue for you. He’s the owner’s son and I work as a server in his hotel. He’s nobility and I’m not…he’s engaged and his fiancé tricked my sister and wanted her dead and even his mother is involved,” he leaned back in his bed, a frown sitting firmly on his face.

“Exactly, you can see the truth completely, then why-”

“Well you can see the truth too can’t you? You know exactly that Noeul doesn’t love you. One day she’s nice the next she hates you. She is toying with you and you know it. You also know that your mother despises her…and even if you swear on your life Junho, I would never believe that the kid is yours.”

Junho looked away, looking like a picture of sadness and denial that Inho hadn’t wanted to unravel.

But he started it.

“But you love her anyway Junho.”

“No, Noeul is different. None of you get her-”

“You don’t either…but you love her and you see her the way you want to. As an angel,” he added sarcastically before looking away.

“And how do you see Gihunssi?”

Silence.

“Help me get it. Make it make sense-”

“There is no sense. There’s no logic in any of this. It’s crazy. Crazy of me to get attached to someone so quickly. Crazy of me to feel this pull to him while all of this is happening.”

He smiled wistfully, or perhaps bitterly.

“Crazy of me to even think someone like him could feel the same.” He felt odd unloading to someone, letting everything out in front of a friend. Someone he knew he could trust. It was a foreign feeling to have someone he could talk to and even though Junho was trying to burst his bubble, he still appreciated him for what he was.

A brother.

“It’s not crazy hyung, it’s impossible.”

An annoying little brother.

“You know, even though I was happy to have found Saebyeok and to have made sure she’s alright and was so glad to take her away from here, a part of me was miserable about leaving Gihun. I couldn’t imagine leaving him behind.”

He looked over at Junho.

“Leaving you two behind.”

Junho’s sad frown turned into something happy.

Something glad.

“I’m glad you’re here hyung.”

Inho smiled.

“And screw love,” he added cheerfully.

They both laughed before going to sleep.

Gihun was getting ready to go to the secret place when Kim Youngmi entered the suite. “Good morning,” he said cheerfully.

“Good morning Gihunssi,” she smiled timidly before taking away the towels he’d placed for her to change. Gihun watched her with a smile. Youngmi was an exceptionally kind young woman. Always wearing a shy smile on her face. She was one of his favourites if he was honest. Always had been.

He noticed her glancing at the bottle of wine red manicure that Junhee had forgotten in his room. “Do you like it?”

“The color looks very pretty sir,” she replied shyly and he smiled bigger.

“Well then it’s yours,” he said as he held out the bottle to her. He saw her smile turn into mortification and it made him smile more.

“I didn’t mean it like that sir, I swear-”

“I know. But I want you to have it anyway,” he placed it in her hand. “But don’t put it on during work or ms Jang will fire not only you but both of us.” Youngmi chuckled, “and I promise that when you get married, I’ll get you a giant bag filled with any makeup you like.”

“Thank you so much sir. I’ll have to start looking for someone then,” she smiled shyly.

“Aren’t you engaged?”

Youngmi chuckled. “No I wish. Although, who knows, maybe I’m finally getting lucky,” she said, her cheeks turning red. Gihun gasped in excitement, grinning ear to ear. “Oh, someone on your mind? Do I know them?”

“I don’t think you know him sir. He’s new,” she glanced away shyly with a timid smile before thanking him again and leaving quickly.

Gihun’s frozen smile gradually faded into something ugly as he crossed his arms and felt it sink in further.

New huh.

Youngil is a dead man.

He felt his scent sour at the feeling. Not just the jealousy but the thought of Inho attracting someone else and for it to possibly go somewhere.

Did he reciprocate?

Was there a thing between them?

She likes him.

Did he like her?

The questions followed him until he got to the secret place. He was even late, but he had to get his scent under control before going.

“Sorry I’m late, I had to take care of something for Junhee,” he went to stand in front of Inho who looked as handsome as ever in his white dress shirt.

“No problem. I just have to get back to work soon.”

Gihun nodded before looking at him again. “Anything new about Saebyeok?”

Inho’s faint smile faded at the mention of her, the same shadow of sadness looming back over him again. “No,” he sighed, “I just wish it would all end.”

Gihun gave him a wry smile filled with a hint of disappointment and bitterness, “so you can take her and go?”

Inho looked at him silently.

He chuckled defeatedly. “I hope you find her Inho.”

And the crazy part was that he meant it. He fucking meant it despite knowing exactly where it would lead. It would lead him to being left alone at the secret place. Still he wished for it because he just wanted Inho to be happy more.

“What’s wrong?” Inho was looking at him unreadably.

“Nothing,” he smiled, his signature trained smile that he had used on everyone in his life. The kind of smile he hadn’t used in the secret place, the kind he hadn’t used when he talked to Inho.

“Do you think I’ll believe that just because you smiled?” He said teasingly and Gihun had to pause.

No one ever noticed or cared when he gave them this smile. They either saw it as real, as how they wanted to see it, or they just ignored it and let it go. No one ever stopped and questioned it, no, no one ever even noticed.

But he had.

Of course he had.

“You smile when you’re sad,” again he said it with such a certainty. Yet so quietly, so gently.

Gihun looked back at him and noticed how easy Inho just sees right through him, how he disarms him with one single smile. One single sentence.

Did he do that with Youngmi?

He smiled sarcastically as he felt the same green ugly feeling taking root in him again. “You’re getting good at sweet talking. You should say these things to Youngmi I’m sure she’ll like it,” he nodded at him with a sarcastic smile.

Inho frowned and then smiled slightly in bewilderment. “Youngmi?”

Gihun’s smile dropped. He couldn’t act like it didn’t bother him anymore.

“I’m just surprised that you have the time to work, look for your sister and to have a thing with Youngmi,” he shrugged, not bothering to contain his annoyance.

God he was hypocrite.

Inho’s smile dropped, “what thing? She’s like a sister to me.”

“Well she doesn’t see you as her brother,” he interjected firmly, only noticing too late that he was showing too much. Inho leaned back subtly in surprise and it made him feel shit.

He was such a hypocrite, scolding Inho for someone liking him while he was the engaged one. What right did he even have.

“I’m sorry, that’s none of my business. I’m just a bit mad,” he walked away towards the bench and sat down while Inho followed him, standing in front of him.

“What’s wrong?” Gihun remained silent, staring at the water. “I always tell you whenever something’s bothering me. Try me for once.”

One corner twitched upwards despite his frown.

How can he say what’s on his mind? Can he say how Sangwoo ruined the nearly perfect day for him and reminded him of the dilemma following him everywhere.

Inho kept staring at him patiently and Gihun couldn’t keep it in anymore.

“Sangwoo wants to set a wedding date and wants to announce at tomorrow’s party,” he said quietly and watched as Inho’s face barely changed.

Very small, just a twitch in his eyebrows but it was his eyes that revealed more, his eyes darkened as though a shadow fell over them, shutting something in them away.

He looked away.

In shame? Embarrassment?

“I understand if you don’t wish to talk about it. I know talking about anything that concerns him is difficult.”

“No, it’s not because it concerns him. It’s because it concerns you.”

Gihun looked up.

Inho looked unreadable as ever as he watched him. He didn’t look like someone who had said too much and Gihun wondered how he does it. How he can look so calm when he had just said something that would unravel him.

“The choice is always yours. What do you want?”

Gihun looked at him and shrugged helplessly, his frown deepening. “I don’t know what I want. Ever since I’ve been back, I’ve been trying to find out how I really feel about him... Do I love him? Was the situation with Saebyeok the reason why I was simply scared off? Or do I only see him as something of the past and now he’s just family to me?”

He looked at his lap in shame.

“Or am I like the one you loved? Do I just love his love for me,” he said in a small voice not daring to look up.

“No you’re nothing like him. Trust me.” Inho caught his gaze and nodded in affirmation before taking a deep breath. “I’ll tell you something even though it’s difficult to say.”

“Take Saebyeok out of the equation. Look at the whole thing without doubt.”

“I don’t feel like myself when I’m with him,” he confessed for the first time and it felt like a revelation and a tragedy all at once.

“I’m used to following my gut. Even if everyone is against me, I still follow my heart blindly.”

“So what changed?”

You

You came along and changed everything, he thought as he looked at Inho.

“This time my heart is conflicted, pulling me into two different directions,” he said looking at Inho both of them knowing in that moment that one direction was Inho himself.

One direction pulled him back to this place.

To this man.

One corner of Inho’s lips twitched upwards. “What if your heart is mad at you for not listening to it properly.”

Gihun smiled at the implication, at the thought of Inho silently telling him that his heart was telling him that they were the right choice.

The real choice.

“I have to get back to work. We’ll talk later.”

Gihun nodded and was about to watch him leave when Inho suddenly stopped and turned back.

“Back then when my relationship ended, I was confused too. Kept wondering whether I really loved him. But do you know when that confusion ended?”

Gihun held his breath as Inho smiled softly at him.

“When I truly fell in love.”

Inho turned around and left him absolutely stunned.

Ruined.

He ruined him, clear and simple.

And yet he still smiled like a fool at the empty space Inho left behind.

Chapter Text

The Grand Hotel was known for many things but if Inho had to pick the one thing they were most revered for, it was their parties.

When the Grand had a party lined up it was bound to be the most glamorous event of the whole year. That is until they had the next one lined up. But they were never careless with their parties either. They never hosted enough for it be the norm, to lose its spark. No, they always had one once every few months perhaps, about three times a year. Only when they knew it would count. Of course there were holidays that had always warranted a party, for instance they always had one planned out for New Year’s Eve and one for important occasions such as the assigning of a new manager. These were all occasions where they wanted the attention and by that he meant the attention of their rich clientele but see this is exactly why this particular party confused him.

A masquerade ball for Sangwoo’s birthday.

Inho rolled his eyes at the thought. Of all people, it was Sangwoo’s birthday that would have the big fancy party. It didn’t make sense to him at first, but the longer he thought about it from a business standpoint the more he understood their choice. After the murder of their receptionist and the constant visits from detective Park Jungbae it couldn’t have been good for their reputation to take that kind of heat and if there’s one thing Madame Seong seems to care about, it’s the reputation of the Grand.

Which is why the halls look the way they do, each corner illuminated with the gleam of the candles standing high on the shining silver candelabras and each table set with silver cutlery and big fresh red roses placed neatly as the centrepiece. Guests entered wearing gowns and suits and jewels that shined in the dim lighting. He noted that the lighting was exceptionally dim tonight as to give the elusive feeling of a masquerade and to transport each guest to an elaborate illusion where they were complete mysteries to the world around them. Madame Seong was very particular and knowing on how to completely enrapture her audience. Surely enough, each one of them was wearing a unique mask, each looking more expensive than the last as though it was a contest of who could have the best-looking mask of the night. He watched as Guests would greet each other politely underneath the masks and it made him almost snort at the irony of how fitting it is for these people to wear masks. They were always wearing one without the justification of having a masquerade anyway. Always deceiving one another with faux warmth and tonight was no exception, they just get to hide it better. Of course, the only ones not allowed to wear a mask or anything out of the ordinary were the servers. Because that’s what this place does. Enforce a divide between humans, finding a way to demean those they deem below them in any way and tonight the mask symbolized that very ideal. Whoever didn’t have a mask wasn’t worth looking at in the first place. Whoever was visible was truly invisible tonight.

He watched the ballroom fill in, guests sitting at their designed tables, others immediately grabbing a drink from any standing by server with a silver tray of perfectly shimmering champagne, just like the one he himself was holding now. Of course, others went to the centre first so they could socialize with other equally important or more important people. Inho looked at the chamber orchestra at the back of the ballroom. They were overseeing the dance floor directly in front of them as well as the veranda on their left where the waltz melodies graced the party as well as the air outside in the empty space, free to escape.

Exactly how he wished to escape this place and go out the empty veranda down the familiar path. Just to shut out the noise. He glanced at the shiny chandeliers, each illuminating every few meters as the wealthy stood underneath them and took them for granted.

Took everything for granted.

It reminded him of the night he first entered the hotel, well the second night if he truly thought about it. But somehow, he never counted that first day. He only counted the first night he saw Gihun as the beginning. He can say his journey here started two months ago on a random day when he reached the hotel and stared at it from the view of a lost outsider looking for answers, but he knew deep down that it started the moment he stumbled across the secret place and met Seong Gihun.

There he was, dancing in a black and white suit with none other than Sangwoo.

Inho watched them across the floor and felt like dying or frankly killing someone. Sangwoo who ironically enough wasn’t wearing a mask kept whispering into Gihun’s ear every few seconds while Gihun would smile and giggle while twirling.

What pained Inho the most was that despite the beautiful silver sparkly mask and the dim light, he could still see the discomfort in his eyes underneath the mask. Even despite the distance, he could feel the strained smile stretching so hard that it must hurt.

And all he could do was stand at the side and hold the tray tighter.

Gihun would play role perfectly, dancing, joking and smiling but every now and then he would catch his eyes across the dance floor. Just a glimpse. Just one fleeting second where they both remind each other that they were here.

It killed him how Gihun’s eyes would sparkle the one second he looked before tearing his gaze away again, depriving him of the only thing that made him feel sane.

His warmth.

The longer he stood here and the moment each tune would change he would notice new things, perhaps it’s his eyes deceiving him into seeing what he wants to see, feeding his delusions that keep him at bay. He wants to see Gihun searching for him, he wants to feel as though his presence was just as vital and comforting to Gihun as his was to him.

“And can you dance?” He looked to his side and found his manager Mr Park smiling as he stared at the dancing pairs excitedly. Mr Park was truly a unique man to say the least. He likes to joke with everyone and takes it easy on his boys—that’s what he called all of them—to the utter dismay of Ms Jang Geumja. But the light conversation and management style doesn’t take away from his sternness when he needs it. Inho truly admired him.

“I don’t think so,” he looked back at Gihun and Sangwoo, contemplating how many steps it would take to reach them and slam Sangwoo with the tray. It was real silver and very heavy.

It would do the job.

“Everyone can dance Inho. Just imagine it, you dancing with the person you love underneath the moonlight. It’s wonderful.” Inho abandoned his plan to look at his manager and notice the wistful smile on his face.

He knows this man has his own story and if it were any other circumstance, he would truly want to know.

Suddenly out of nowhere, as if summoned by a force from above alerting her that they weren’t doing their jobs properly, Ms Jang Geumja appeared with an annoyed frown on her face. “Can you go downstairs and ask the chefs to have the first serve ready in half an hour?” She looked at him, completely ignoring Mr Park who was grinning at the sight of her. He nodded and faintly heard Mr Park offer her a dance. He almost smiled just imagining her aggravated response.

But his eyes still lingered on the couple in the corner of his eye.

Sangwoo not wearing a mask almost made him laugh when he thought about it. Of all the hotel employees, and yes Sangwoo was still an employee even as the general manager, he should be the one wearing a mask the most. He was hiding such a horrible monstrous part underneath all the luxury clothing and yet he probably felt the most at ease without a mask. Because he didn’t need one to hide his true self. He’d mastered it all on his own anyway.

He moved quickly downstairs doing as instructed and and refilled his tray before heading back upstair. He stood next to a pillar observing the guests. He could see Mrs Kang sitting by the Seongs table next to Junhee and Myunggi, talking animatedly about God knows what. He saw Madame Seong approach them in her red dress, without a mask, smiling ear to ear and talking to Mrs Kang who seemed less amused now that the Madame was here. However, despite his best efforts it only took a few minutes until his gaze wandered back to Gihun. Still dancing.

How long were they planning on dancing?

His kept watching them as his tray gradually got empty. The moment the music hit a crescendo he felt something rustling in his pocket.

Movement

He quickly looked to his side but didn’t see anyone near him except for groups of guests too busy talking to each other to even notice him. His hand went quickly to his suit jacket pocket and felt the texture of a folded paper.

Someone had stashed a letter in his pocket

“Youngil, stop doing this. I can see you staring at Gihunssi the whole time. Just do your job will you?” Inho looked back up dazed and found Junho now standing next to him with a look that tried to be stern.

Saebyeok.

It must have been her.

His lips parted as he realized, and he pushed the tray into the oblivious Junho. Letting it go barely as Junho held it in his arms. “Inho?” He sounded very confused, but Inho didn’t care. All he could do was walk away downstairs so he could read it.

Saebyeok was here.

He went down to the empty hallway next to the stairs he came from and quickly unfolded the letter as he went to stand next to the lamp illuminating the hallway.

It was her writing. His sister.

Inho,

Told you I’d be back out of nowhere. Please forgive me Inho. I know what I did was wrong, but I want you to know that you’re the best brother I could ever ask for. It’s almost over Inho, tonight is the night. I’ll finish one last thing and then we’ll go, and I’ll tell you all about it at the train station where we can finally leave this place behind. Just you and me.

I love you brother

Inho’s heart was beating loudly in the quiet corridor, rereading every line and each time he’d finish it he’d read it again with new emotions bubbling up in his chest. He’d read it with relief that she’s alright then read it with gratitude that they could leave soon so he can get her somewhere safe. Then he’d read it with fear because of the last thing she still needs to do here. The last puzzle piece in her plan of revenge. And finally, he’d read it with utter devastation because it meant his time here was up.

His time with Gihun and Junho was up.

He’d have to leave him behind tonight. Leave the grand Hotel behind forever.

But as much as it hurt for him to acknowledge how his heart broke at the fact, he was relieved first and foremost.

His sister would have to come first.

Even if it’s over his happiness.

He walked back upstairs and the moment he reached the ballroom he heard the announcement of the start of a waltz and saw the contained precise chaos of many guests heading towards the dance floor at the same time. He tried to catch sight of Saebyeok anywhere, but he knew it was almost impossible. The new dance was about to start, and he tried to look everywhere, the masks making it impossible to recognize anyone. While frantically looking he saw Mrs Seong frozen, her smile fallen in contrast to before, standing alone before Junhee approached her. He looked towards the dance floor and couldn’t see Sangwoo.

They weren’t dancing anymore.

As the seconds passed and Inho kept walking and looking for any sign of Saebyeok or Gihun, Gihun finally made himself known. Walking carefully without his mask while looking around before their eyes caught. Gihun looked at him almost worriedly as if he felt something was wrong.

Inho tilted his head towards the veranda and walked away without waiting.

He stood at the back of the veranda next to the stairs he’d use to get to the paths that eventually lead to the secret place. Gihun approached him quickly, looking more worried than before. “What’s wrong?”

“Saebyeok is here.” Despite the stress and the fear at the back of his mind he breathed a sigh of relief and half smiled because his sister is alright. “She snuck up on me and stashed this letter in my pocket,” he said as he handed Gihun the letter.

Gihun, who had started smiling in relief took the letter quickly, reading it in lightning speed as Inho watched his face pale in dread, his smile immediately falling. “Leave? Where to? When?” He asked almost frantically as his head shot up from the letter. He looked so scared that Inho’s heart clenched painfully.

Gihun was scared of losing him just as much as he was scared of losing Gihun.

“I- I don’t know. She said she’ll explain everything at the station. I’ll have to go there now,” he said quickly, allowing himself to hope that despite his own heartbreak his sister would be safe. Then, noticing the way Gihun’s eyes shined with something other than light, “I’ll delay the train by a few days. We’ll figure something out,” he added softly, unknowing who he was currently comforting more.

Gihun?

Or himself

Right when Gihun opened his mouth to speak, they heard the sound of footsteps and Inho went to hide underneath the veranda by the stairs.

Sangwoo was looking around the veranda before noticing Gihun. He walked quickly towards him and immediately held his arm almost urgently. “What are you doing here?” He asked, looking on edge.

“Just wanted some fresh air,” he smiled and felt Sangwoo’s grip tighten slightly. His eyes now wilder, looking everywhere around the empty veranda before settling back on him.

“Did you see anyone come here?” His voice was almost steady if it weren’t for the certain edge of unrest in his tone. Gihun’s eyes narrowed at his almost worried behavior.

“Someone like who?”

Sangwoo looked back at him, settling back into his calm mask. “No one. Let’s go back inside, he said with a smile. Guiding Gihun back inside as he stared around them carefully while Gihun’s eyes went back to the stairs before finally turning around.

Inho went back inside, finding Junho standing by the dance floor as he held an empty tray while being completely lost staring at Kang Noeul who stood with other employees watching the party from upstairs right by the main marble staircase.

He tugged at him, pulling his arm calmly until they reached their room. Junho sat down at the table after asking him what’s wrong and not getting any answer in return. Then finally, as Inho started getting his clothes out of the cupboard, he paused and looked back at the confused Junho. “Junho, Saebyeok is back. She’s here and she wants me to go meet her at the station.”

Junho’s face brightened up, “hyung that’s great news!”

Inho nodded and took off his black suit jacket before stopping again. “I- I’ll have to leave tonight Junho.”

Junho’s face fell

“Leave?”

He nodded while pursing lips, “I’ll take her and go.”

“Are you going to leave me Inho?” Inho froze at the sadness in his voice and truly took the time to stare at him. Junho didn’t just look sad; no, he looked defeated.

Inho lowered his head slightly, walking closer to Junho who still sat numbly, staring at him with a sad frown. He halted next his chair, looking down with a sadness that matched him. “You know, I-” the words felt difficult to say out loud. To admit to anyone other than himself because he was never used to this. To having a circle of people he cared about instead of it just being his sister.

And now he had to bargain the newfound circle for her safety. But still, he needs Junho to know that it had mattered despite not lasting. He had mattered to him more than he wanted to admit.

It kept him alive.

He kept him alive.

“I came here looking for my sister but now that I found her, I’ll have to leave my brother behind.” His hand squeezed Junho’s shoulder gently, saying every word through the pain of knowing it would only make it worse for both of them. But still he needed Junho to know that as far as he’s concerned, they’re brothers.

And the look in Junho’s eyes and the glistening in them assured him that Junho saw it the same damn way.

He stepped back and went to back to the closet as they suddenly heard faint noises coming from outside.

“Did you hear that?” Junho said absentmindedly, his voice still laced with sadness.

“HELP”

They both stood still for a second, completely frozen.

“FIRE!”

“HELP US!

Junho jumped up and ran out the room, leaving Inho frozen one second longer before he ran after him. They ran back upstairs and saw the guests all running towards the exit.

No fashion or precision in their movements.

Just chaos and fear.

Mr Park tried to be the voice of reason, instructing the guests to calm down, assuring them the fire was under control and that it was not on this floor. He yelled at Junho and him to go down to the laundry room where the fire was before regaining the calm tone as he uselessly tried to halt the guests from running away.

They ran to the hall of the laundry room, seeing all the employees running around with water buckets and those running back out to refill the buckets, looking grey, the smoke and derbies all over their faces and clothes. Still, they were running, some pausing to cough before running again. They ran towards the burning room, feeling the heat lashing out all the way to the hall, almost feeling like burning. Inho watched the bright orange storm inside, raging wildly as people tried to tame it. Junho took a bucket and ran inside the room and right when Inho went to follow him blindly even without a bucket just to make sure he’s alright, Myunggi suddenly came out of the room, immediately clashing into him and falling in his arms, depending on Inho to hold him as his knees collapsed. He was coughing violently, trying to breathe but unable to from the suffocating coughs. Inho tried to stabilize him so he can breathe better, assuring him that he was alright.

“I couldn’t save her, I couldn’t save her,” he kept repeating and coughing in between each two words as tears fell down his face.

Inho placed him on the ground by the wall gently, watching him cry as he struggled to breathe. He turned towards the room, walking quickly to the violent orange hue before Junho jumped out of the room trying to catch his breath. He fell right into his arms heavily, chest heaving before looking at him desperately. “Inho, lets go back upstairs.”

Inho frowned at him in confusion but continued to hold on to him. “What do you mean, we need to help-”

“They got it under control, let’s go back upstairs,” he said louder and more urgently this time, his grip on his chest and shoulders tightening and starting to push him away from the room.

“Junho are you-”

“INHO LISTEN TO ME YOU CAN’T GO IN THERE,” he yelled with tears falling down his face now, shaking him with a desperation that made his heart stop.

No

Right when the thought hit his mind he looked behind Junho, seeing four men running out, carrying a young woman in a burnt burgundy dress, an arm floating loosely in the air as her dark hair swayed with the movement.

She looked so peaceful as though she had been sleeping.

Just like she did after he had comforted her during the harvest fire all those years ago.

“Saebyeok?”

The world stopped.

Instead of being the one to hold, he was now the one being held. Junho wrapping his arms around him with all his strength to hold him back even before he got the thought to fight. To run.

“SAEBYEOK.”

He started yelling after her, calling out her name like she could hear him, like she would suddenly stand up and come running to him like she did when she was a kid. He started to run after her just like he had in the fields when they used to play together. Only this time he couldn’t run because Junho was holding him down with all his power, crying more the harder he resisted. He kept pushing Junho as he cried out for her. Why wouldn’t he let him go? His sister was not gone; she just needs him.

She looked so pretty in that dress. Lying in there like an angel all alone, needing him while he wasn’t there.

Again.

He’d let her down again and this time was the last.

He kept yelling for her to come back, for time to bring his sister back. But time wouldn’t listen, no one would. He kept pushing against Junho to no avail until his muscles lost their strength to keep standing, kept yelling until his voice was hoarse and gone. He didn’t blink as he watched her get carried away down the hall, his eyes stinging until he couldn’t see anymore. But all of it didn’t change a thing.

She’s gone.

We’ll go

She left him.

Just you and me

She died down here all alone while he couldn’t protect her.

You’re the best brother I could ever ask for

He collapsed, the world going dark for him.

Saebyeok, please forgive me

Please forgive me Inho

No, it didn’t just go dark.

His world ended.

I love you brother

Gihun was in his room when he got the news that someone had died in the fire. His heart clenched as the unease settled over him. He had a horrible feeling that made him unable to breathe or think. Sangwoo had forcibly pulled him upstairs to his room the moment the screaming about the fire started. He didn’t let go of his arm until they were in his suite, telling him not to leave the room and when Gihun had argued, he shut him up by saying that he needed to make sure he’s safe before he can deal with the mess downstairs. Gihun promised to stay all while Sangwoo ordered him not to open the door to anyone who isn’t family.

He had frowned at the sentence.

Now though, everything was forgotten as he left his room in a hurry. He’d only heard someone outside mentioning somebody’s death and he needed to know who it was, and he wasn’t getting any answers here. When he left the hallway and went down the stairs he saw Youngmi crying alone, struggling to breathe. He went down quickly to her, “Youngmi, do- do you know who died?”

She started crying harder than before and Gihun rushed to comfort her, stroking her back gently. She was completely distraught and it only scared him more.

Please no

He started praying he was wrong. He hoped he was wrong. It can't be Inho. If it’s Inho he will die right here.

“It- she- I’m so sorry,” she cried again and while Gihun knew in that moment that it wasn’t Inho, the dread didn’t leave him. It intensified. He wrapped his arms around and rocked her gently while looking at the empty ballroom. Where was Inho? Where can he find someone who’ll tell him who-

“Saebyeok I’m so sorry.”

Gihun froze, his eyes widening as he looked back at her in horror, his arms stiffening before dropping and instead holding her by the arms so she could face him. “Sae- Hwang Saebyeok?!”

His heart stopped the moment he said it.

But the moment she nodded while crying was the moment his heart dropped entirely. Something in him shattered as he gasped.

Saebyeok died.

He looked at the stairs heading downstairs and ran.

Junho and Mr Park carried Inho’s unconscious body back to the room, laying him on the bed before standing stiffly and waiting for the doctor to arrive.

Junho looked at his manager who was frowning in concern at Inho. “Sir, it’s fine I- I- I’ll take care of him,” he said, his own voice sounding hoarse. Mr Park didn’t know anything and he doesn’t have to. As far as he’s concerned Youngil simply lost consciousness from the smoke.

“I’ll check on the fire and come back again,” he said not tearing his concerned gaze off Inho for a few seconds before leaving quickly. Junho stared after him and although he knew Mr Park was a good man and a smart one who probably felt that something wasn’t right, he knew he wouldn’t be the one to tell him anything. It’s true that he wasn’t the best with secrets most times but not when it came to Inho.

Inho

He looked back at him and couldn’t stop the tears building and the suffocated breath he let out. How would he deal with this?

How could he even?

Saebyeok is everything to him, so how will he live after this. After all he’s done to try and find her.

He started sobbing, holding his head in his hands as everything sank in. Inho’s small smile as he said he’d finally take his little sister and go. When he ran into the room and saw her lying on the ground, dress half burnt, everything in him sank, letting him freeze for longer than he should’ve, breathing in the smoke. But then his entire being focused on getting Inho out of here, the fire be damned he wanted to protect Inho. Even if it's just for a little while.

Just a few minutes to protect the Inho he knew wouldn’t be there anymore after this.

There’s no going back now

The door opened quickly as Gihun stepped in, his frantic eyes going to Inho who was still unconscious before closing the door behind him and coming closer to his bed side. Junho wiped away at his eyes and sniffled quietly trying to compose himself and looked at Gihun.

He was crying.

Gihun didn’t try to hide it like he had, no. He started sobbing quietly, his entire chest shaking with its force. One hand trembled as it went up to his face, not even to wipe his tears but just to hold one side of his face, to try to what? Keep it together?

“How?” He asked shakily not taking his eyes off Inho.

“We don't- we don’t know, she was-…in the fire. We don’t know why or how,” he couldn’t talk properly, the image of the orange storm engulfing the whole room and Saebyeok in the middle on the floor flashing before his eyes.

“How will he-” Gihun choked up, unable to continue the thought before crying again, one hand going to Inho’s shoulder, trembling as though half scared to wake him up and face the aftermath.

The devastation.

Junho remembered Inho’s screams, the way his eyes widened in absolute horror at the sight of her and the way he fought and struggled to leave his grip until he suddenly couldn’t fight anymore, as though the grief got to him quicker than he had anticipated, taking him down. Inho was stronger than him and yet by some force, his desire to protect and shield Inho had been stronger.

He cried again, clenching his eyes shut to stop seeing Inho’s heartbreak.

It was futile.

“Gihunssi, you need to go before anyone catches you here. It’s not safe,” he said numbly, thinking about Inho’s safety first and foremost.

Because Inho was right.

They are brothers.

And he wouldn’t let anything hurt him after tonight. Even if he knew it was simply too late.

That the damage had already been done.

Gihun nodded while the tears kept streaming down his face, eyes still locked on Inho. “I- I’ll be back,” he whispered and Junho felt that it wasn’t directed at him. It was murmured so gently like a promise meant only for Inho. When Gihun started moving to leave, his eyes finally met his. Both freezing for a second when each saw the heartbreak on the other’s face.

Heartbreak for Inho

For Saebyeok

Gihun’s face was the first to crumble with sadness, fresh tears welling up as he looked at him. Junho tried to be the strong one, he really did but even his frown couldn’t stop the tears from falling. They both loved this man, he knew that now and they both knew that after tonight, Inho would lose the will to live and it already broke them…

After Gihun left and Mr Park came back, assuring him that the fire was finally put out, they sat down and waited for Inho to wake up.

But he didn’t

He started flinching slightly in his sleep, his face twitching occasionally before stilling again.

“Sis- sister.”

Junho looked at him, he was still unconscious, still gone. Then he looked at Mr Park and saw it all falling into place as his eyes widened slightly in realization. He looked at Junho in shock, “she’s his sister?” Junho looked back, broken down and tired before looking back at Inho. He wouldn’t say it, he couldn’t. Because even though she’s gone and Inho was battling his worst nightmares wherever he was, it still wasn’t for him to say. He had promised Inho, and he would never break his promise. But at the same time, he knew Mr Park wasn’t stupid and that the silence was enough of an answer.

Still, he wouldn’t betray Inho’s trust. Inho had been— not lucky—he wasn’t lucky at all. But none of the employees downstairs noticed his yelling, everyone too panicked and loud themselves to even hear his horrified screaming as anything other than out of panic like their own. Still, no one understood the pain he felt the moment he saw her. None saw him until he collapsed by the corner of the room.

He was still protected and that was all that matters for now.

Days passed and Inho was still in a psychogenic coma. A doctor and a nurse would come by everyday to check on his vitals or change his IV bags. Junho and Mr Park had both refused to have him taken to a hospital. Junho insisting that Inho stays here so that he can keep an eye on him at all times and Mr Park simply backed him up because he knows that Inho or Youngil will need someone he trusts by his side when he woke up.

There was one other reason why Junho wanted him to stay here.

Gihun

Gihun has been acting like a stray cat the last few days, sneaking in every night to stay by Inho’s bed side for hours until he had to leave at dawn again. It was awkward for him at first since he shared the room with Inho, especially since they’ve known each other for years and he never once saw Gihun act this way. Not with anyone, not even his fiancé. So yes, he knew that Gihun would never want Inho to leave his side.

Gihun was way past the point of pretending that he didn’t care, that he didn’t love Inho. He didn’t hide it from him. He’d just open and close the door quietly, sitting on the chair left for him next to Inho’s bed. Junho would fill his time and go walk outside or go to Kim’s bar just to give them both some privacy.

He’d come back in the dead of night and find Gihun sitting on the chair dozed off, his hand holding Inho’s tightly. It made him sad for both of them. Sad that Inho had been right about Gihun’s feelings and sad that their situation was as doomed as it was. He’d wake Gihun up sometimes with a guilty smile and watch him wake up groggily before always going back to stare at Inho, in his eyes the fragile half hope that he woke up and half fear that he did. Fear of what’s to come.

Mr Park would come check on him too and Junho was never sure if Gihun was so careful that he was never caught by Mr Park, narrowly avoiding him every time or whether Mr Park just let it happen.

Whenever Gihun wasn’t there, he’d stay by Inho’s side, updating him on every little thing that happened, letting him know that detective Park was asking about him. Even seemed a little concerned about him somehow. Telling him that he was investigating her death and that he didn’t buy that it was an accident.

The one thing he wouldn’t tell Inho was that Sangwoo and Madame Seong pretended that her death had been an accident. They had found a diamond brooch by her body that night and said that she had wanted to steal it. They declared it a ridiculous plan conducted by a scorned and vengeful ex employee who simply wanted to burn the hotel down but got caught up in her hatred instead. It made his blood boil how they dismissed her in that disgusting way, reducing her to nothing but an inconvenience. He couldn’t imagine how Inho could ever handle this and a part of him saw it as mercy that he had collapsed as to not deal with the consequences that would’ve surely broken him more.

So he talked about everything else. Such as the fact that ever since the party, people have been checking out like the fire was still there. Leaving the hotel without a second glance to the annoyance of management. Unlike last time where Ali was murdered outside of the hotel, this time it happened in the heart of it and they were all witnesses. Thankfully, they were human enough to leave even if Junho knew that they didn’t do it out of empathy or kindness for the lost soul. No they did it for image and the Grand’s image was less now. Beneath them. Still, he saw it as a victory, letting Inho know that the hotel was suffering after her, its reputation damaged for the very first time ever.

She got what she wanted; it wasn’t for nothing.

Gihun was suffocating.

Every time he woke up and remembered that Saebyeok was gone was another moment his heart sank all over again. These days he’d stopped caring about anything that wasn’t Inho, just waking up numbly and waiting until the night came and allowed him to go be with the man who’d lost everything. He’d sneak downstairs, opening and closing the door with soft click, barely looking at Junho in the process. They didn’t have to talk about this, they truly didn’t. All he knew that mattered was that both of them were all Inho had left now. That thought broke him more.

Inho’s scruff grew and Gihun would watch it, even sometimes allowing his hand to brush over it and feel its roughness on his fingertips before they wandered over his face, to his hair and the strands that fell over his eye, brushing them away gently. Until the one touch would become two and three until all he could do was stroke his hair slowly with care while he struggled not to cry again. But still, every time he left the room his eyes were red and dry and he’d leave the room while his heart stayed behind.

He sat on his chair by the bed with his book in hand, trying to focus on it and not think about the tightness in his chest that came from the doubt, anger and grief. It was the early evening and he knew it was early but he couldn’t wait to leave the dinner table as soon as they had started complaining about the lack of guests. The way his mother and Sangwoo dismissed it, dismissed her drove him crazy. He’d look at Junhee and find her sitting uncomfortably, staring at her barely eaten food while Myunggi still looked, well for a lack of a better word. Haunted.

He looked haunted.

When he’d asked Junhee what was wrong with him, she dismissed him immediately. Chalking it up to the fact that he’d been in the fire and had tried to save Saebyeok. Gihun wondered what he was even doing there. Of all people, why was he one of the first ones on scene along with Kim Youngmi who had been the one to scream that there was a fire in the first place.

It didn’t make sense and only left him with more questions.

Saebyeok was there to get revenge not to burn to death. So why would she start a fire and stay in it?

Why was Sangwoo so spooked that night, asking him if he’d seen someone?

Why were Myunggi and Junhee acting so oddly?

When would Inho wake up?

He gripped the book tighter and tried to read for a while when Inho suddenly screamed her name, waking up with a fright as though he was in a nightmare. Gihun was by his side in an instant, sitting on the bed while holding his arms gently as he sat up. Inho was breathing heavily, chest heaving while his unfocused eyes looked around before finally settling on him. His mouth closed shut as reality hit, causing him to still his movement and just look at Gihun silently. Like he was evaluating the situation and looking for validation that everything had truly happened. Gihun pursed lips sadly, fighting back any tears as his eyes bore into Inho’s, holding his breath. Inho looked back, his eyes analyzing his face carefully before they lowered sadly, confirming everything he ever feared.

They were both unmoving, staring at one another for what felt like a lifetime when one corner of Inho’s lips almost lifted upwards in a defeated way, not smiling no, it was look of a man who was thoroughly broken. Gihun could only mirror him as his heart was finally beating while also breaking at the sight. Both of them were just staring at each other like they were what each of them needed the most.

And he did.

He needed Inho like air.

Inho hugged him, his arms wrapping themselves around his waist tightly as he buried his head in his shoulder. Gihun barely felt the wetness on his cheek as he threw his arms around his neck, hugging him just as tightly. He could only hear the sound of sobs and sniffles and he couldn’t know whether it was from him or Inho. He only felt the beating of Inho’s heart aligning with his own as they let themselves finally collapse together.

Inho was leaning on him with everything he had and in that moment it was worth the world, to feel Inho’s hurt and pain as he finally let go in his arms, holding him tighter as he cried. They kept crying until all that was left of Inho’s strength was gone again, letting Gihun pull him back into bed as he fell asleep, leaving the shadow of his damp breath and the wetness of his tears on his shoulder as a reminder.

Inho was still here.

That’s all that mattered now.

“That’s the truth Mr Park.” He sat outside the the hotel by the benches of the back entrance. He’d been awake for a two hours now, sitting with Junho—who hadn’t left his side a second— and Mr Park as the clock turned to one am.

He’d told him everything that happened not because he felt obligated to do so but because he needed to say everything out loud to someone who didn’t know anything. He wanted the chance to let it all out and show someone new how unfair it was. How unfair and cruel her fate had been. Besides, he knew from Junho that he’d heard him calling out for his sister. So no point in fooling someone who is better not to be fooled with.

His sister was gone. Just like that. Not half an hour after stashing her final letter in his pocket.

The letter that promised a new chance where they could be together and he could take care of her.

Someone took her away from him and he knew exactly who.

Sangwoo

It had to be him.

It was always him.

“You know sir, if Inho tells you everything that means he really trusts and respects you,” Junho said amicably, trying to uplift his spirits just like he had from the moment he came into the room and found him awake.

“He never trusts anyone, it’s just me and-” he stopped abruptly as he noticed Inho’s stare.

Mr Park looked at both of them with a shadow of a smile. “Continue, you and Gihun and who else?” He smiled at both of them slyly. Inho only blinked, remaining unreadable while Junho, ever the idiot, widened his eyes comically.

“I’m not stupid Inho. It would be hard not put two and two together, especially when I saw him sneak into the room every night.”

“You saw him?” Junho repeated quietly.

“No of course not. Just like you never did either. Just like I’ve never met any Inho out here and won’t know him unless we’re alone,” he said with a smile and Inho knew he could trust him. He wouldn’t have said anything if he didn’t but still, the reassurance put him at ease.

As much as he can be in this state.

“Damn you Inho. Putting all this responsibility on us,” he said with no malice, just smiling into the night sky.

Inho looked at him, about to question when Park looked back and smiled again. “When you let someone into your inner circle, your inner room so to speak, that’s responsibility. Because it means you trust them and it means that they need to be worthy of that trust and at least help you get your messy room back in order. Back on track.” His smile widened, “and your room isn’t just a mess, it’s a whole dumpster,” he chuckled lightly while Inho continued to look blankly.

“What about me Mr Park, could you tidy up my room? You have my permission,” Junho joined in with a chuckle.

“Junho your room has one big balcony by the street, open for everyone to peek at.”

They both laughed and while Inho stared at Junho laughing, he was unaware that the corner of his lips faintly twitched upwards. “Ha, see. You smiled again even though you were convinced that you wouldn’t smile ever again,” Mr Park smiled at him wistfully.

He looked away.

How could he even smile?

“Because we’re humans Inho.”

Inho looked back at him and found him still smiling gently.

“Death took everything from me…When she died I was sure that I did too and so I remained dead. Until one day, I smiled. That smile grew and turned into a laugh so deep, it came straight from the heart. That’s when I realized that life is much more fun than death. But the important part is that you yourself have chosen to want to live Inho.”

He looked at the sky and decided that for now, he doesn’t want to live. If he’ll consider breathing, that’s only for her sake. To get justice for her. But he won’t live. He can’t.

Not without her.

“So you didn’t talk to her at all?” Detective Park Jungbae folded her final letter back again after reading it, handing it back to him.

“No. I told you I didn’t get to speak to her. She put the letter in my pocket and left. I couldn’t recognize her because she was dressed like the guests with a mask.”

Detective Park looked at him and leaned forward in his chair, this time not wearing his signature smile. “And when you saw her before she disappeared. What else did she tell you that you didn’t tell me?” He looked pointedly. “Why are you so sure that she was murdered Inho. What if it was really just an accident and she wanted to steal the diamond brooch?”

“I don’t know why she was there. But I know she was murdered.”

“You thought she was murdered before and she turned out to be alive.”

“This time I saw her.”

“You saw her dead. Not murdered…unless you saw something we didn’t.”

Inho decided that he wouldn’t protect anyone anymore. Not for anyone’s sake. The only one he truly wanted to protect was gone because he had failed to do so. So he took a deep breath.

“Cho Sangwoo is behind her death.”

Detective Park finally smiled.

After telling him everything, he left, going to her funeral with a bunch of other employees. All of them went out of respect for their former colleague. Mr Park and Junho were right by his side as they lowered her into the ground. Junho kept a firm hand on his shoulder the whole time as they put his sister at ease in the ground.

His heart was burning him from the inside out as he stood stiffly and watched.

Watched her leave for the very last time.

He kept looking at her casket, remembering the little girl he loved more than life itself. She must feel so alone in there. Just like she had in the burning room. He stared at her and wished it had been him instead.

Because he didn’t deserve to live.

How could he when he had allowed them to hurt her under the very same roof he was in. How could he have failed her so many times until it had cost her her life.

He remembered her words.

We’ll finally stick together

And it will be forever this time

She had lied.

She had lied to him too. She had let them both down as well. But blaming her only hurt him more because it only made him feel like he was an even bigger failure. Blaming her after he’d left her alone only served his self loathing. When he tried to feel angry at the only family he had left it only made him more angry at himself.

All her lies and desire for revenge had led them here.

He knows that.

He is painfully aware that she was no angel in this story, playing with a fire that ended up killing her. He hated it. He hated that in her own way she had led to her own demise. He hated that she wanted that brooch and god help he knew she did. He knew from her earlier plans and letter that she wanted something in return for whatever the hell she had on them.

The secret that got her dead.

Was it worth it? Was the willingness to try and get the brooch worth her life?

Worth leaving him?

Was he that low on her list of priorities, that she was willing to sacrifice them for diamonds?

No it wasn’t her plan. No, he knew it wasn’t her plan to die that night.

She wanted to get revenge true, but she also wanted to get them something that would make tomorrow easier. She just didn’t know that she was enough and that tomorrow wouldn’t come without her.

Junho tapped his shoulder lightly, gesturing with his head towards the distance. He followed the direction with his eyes until he saw Gihun.

Standing far away, wearing all black and staring back sadly.

They both knew he couldn’t come closer and that him being there at all was dangerous enough. One of the owners of the Grand can’t be seen at the funeral of the girl who almost set them all on fire and had wanted to steal a brooch.

Still he was here.

Letting himself be known in the distance.

Inho looked away, unsure if it was enough.

When it was the evening, he sat down in by the back entrance. Ever since he’d woken up, he hadn’t gone once to the secret place. He found that he couldn’t. He felt as though he wasn’t the same person anymore and that he couldn’t go to that place when all he had in his heart was grief, hatred, anger, bitterness and resentment. It didn’t feel right to ruin this place. The one place that hadn’t been touched by his pain yet.

The place that hurt him the most.

Yes, the secret place hurt him.

Because it reminded him of everything he can’t do. Everything he felt that had distracted him long enough for him to fail.

As did Gihun, because he reminded him of everything he kept holding back until it was too late.

He felt someone approach and as he looked up he saw Gihun himself walking towards him carefully as though he was an animal he was scared to spook. His hands were clutching one another tightly as he looked like a guilty child approaching. He stood up quickly, looking around the place to make sure no one was there before looking back at him. “What are you doing here? No one should see you here,” he said concernedly, his voice more harsh than intended.

Gihun didn’t even look taken aback by his coldness, he just looked sad and that made everything worse. “Doesn’t matter. Nothing matters but you,” he whispered softly, staring at him wide eyed with a sad frown.

Inho froze, taken aback. Those eyes staring at him so gently with so much warmth used to make him feel like everything had been right in the world.

What a shame that he felt like he had no world anymore to begin with.

“You can’t be here. It’s dangerous for you.”

“And for me too,” he added numbly.

Gihun raised his brows, smiling at him sadly. “Am I a danger to you now?”

He nodded stiffly.

“I’m worried about you,” he said in a small voice and Inho noticed how tired he looked, noted the dark circles under his eyes, his reddish nose and disheveled hair. Gihun was suffering with him and somehow it felt like Gihun could feel his exact grief.

“How can you be the one I feel the safest with and also be the one I feel the most helpless through? I’m helpless and can’t do what I want to. Just for your sake.”

What he means by that is the core of why he finds it so hard to even look at Gihun nowadays.

Gihun is what kept him from hurting Sangwoo when he should’ve. He held back for his sake and it had cost him everything. Even now, after losing it all, he was still not marching to Sangwoo’s suite with a knife.

All because of Gihun.

And it was hard not to resent himself and Gihun for it.

He had hoped that by not going to the secret place, the feelings that held him back would fade enough for him to go and do what he really wanted.

Go and avenge his sister.

But his feelings for Gihun wouldn’t fade.

“Couldn’t that be what keeps you from hurting yourself?” He tried smiling but it looked too sad. Too pained.

“Too late for that.” Inho felt the sadness in his scent and he knew his words were teetering the line between grievance and cruelty.

“Well I- I was hoping my presence would comfort you and not make everything worse for you,” he whispered sadly, his eyes glistening in the dim light.

Inho could only stare and watch it happen, his pain too strong for him to see it.

“But what matters to me is that you know that I’m here.”

Silence

“Any moment you need me. I’m right here by your side,” he whispered and left, not waiting for Inho to say anything.

Inho watched him go and knew that he didn’t deserve Gihun but he also knew that he couldn’t stop the pain Saebyeok left behind.

He sees her everywhere, her words haunting him even in his sleep.

How can forget her pain and focus on his own?

When he went to the precinct the next day and entered Park’s office, he saw him putting down the telephone with a frown.

“Anything new?” He asked as he sat down in front of him.

“There is,” he said with complete frustration. “The case is closed.”

“What? How?”

No he can’t, no they can’t do this.

“Orders came from above. Got the case closed. We aren’t even allowed to talk about it anymore.”

Inho’s heart broke all over again.

They did this.

They pulled the same strings as they did with Ali.

“So officially speaking, Saebyeok stole the brooch, headed downstairs to burn the hotel, lost consciousness and suffocated in the fire.”

“What about everything I told you?”

He pursed his lips in frustration as he nodded, “until we can officially reopen the case, it is considered an accident. Until otherwise, you have to consider her own greed as the culprit.”

Inho opened his mouth but he couldn’t speak. How can he defend something that he knew to be true. She wanted something that wasn’t hers and he hated that he couldn’t change that.

“I’m sorry,” he added after wincing. Notcing the harshness of his words.

Inho only noticed their truth.

He left the precinct unknowing that the detective planned to fight for him. For her.

He went back to the hotel only feeling wronged and angry. Each step that took him closer to the Grand made him feel like he was willingly walking back to a prison that made it its mission to torture him and take away everything he held dear.

It already had, hadn’t it.

He walked towards the secret place inspite of him, unable to stop walking to the only place capable of comforting him. Like it was the one place in this prison that offered him salvation and peace. But when he reached it, he found Gihun there, standing in front of the water while he smoked. Inho remembered immediately that Gihun only smoked when he was stressed and that sharpened the edge of the knife held by his inner self loathing.

He knew he was the cause.

He knew he was the ailment

And that he was the cure.

But he he couldn’t. He couldn’t go down there and look at him, acting like a piece of him hadn’t died a week ago. He couldn’t even show him the broken parts as they are. Could he look Gihun in the eye and not see how his family had killed his sister? Could he talk to him and try not to see her in the corner of his eye, carried away with the wind. Wronged and alone.

And how could he ever open up when all he knows is to keep quiet and go on?

How could he even acknowledge the love that grew in this very space knowing it could never go anywhere?

He was nothing.

Gihun was everything.

It was as simple as that.

But he can’t ever forget what happened to his sister, he can never forgive and just stay here acting like she had never existed.

Just like everyone was doing now

The only mark she left on them was the lack of guests and their unwillingness to return here. That was it. She didn’t exist beyond that and it nearly kills him every day. The thought of her right and memory getting lost in the wind because of one telephone call done by Myunggi’s powerful father made him stare at each knife in the kitchen just a few seconds longer.

And it wasn’t just for revenge’s sake.

But what held him back each time wasn’t his willingness to live, it wasn’t Junho, it wasn’t even Gihun. It was that if he were to die, then who would be left to remember her?

No one can remember her, as she truly was, other than him.

And if he killed himself then…

Then she would truly be gone forever.

He can’t handle that thought more than anything else which is why he’s still breathing.

Inho looked at Gihun one last time before leaving, walking back to the back entrance and sitting there on a bench thinking everything over.

Why should he stay here?

How could he even?

The only reason he came here, the only reason he stayed and the only reason he remained after the fire was her. He had come to visit, stayed to find her and remained to avenge her. To watch justice get served. But it wasn’t. It was closed because the Seongs wanted it that way and any form of justice he would inflict himself was out of the question and why?

Because he caught feelings.

And he hated himself for putting Gihun before him. A horrible part always taunting him that he was putting Gihun above Saebyeok. Holding back from avenging her just so that Gihun wouldn’t get hurt in the process. That voice didn’t let him sleep.

If he stayed here any longer he will truly die. Either by their hand or his own. He’d avenge her and kill himself after.

Or he will get caught by the police and get put in prison. This time, rightfully so.

Or he will wither away from lack of agency. Become a ghost who will lurk in dark corners as he watched himself become nothing but bitter and resentful. Bitter towards the Seongs, himself, the law, and at some point Gihun himself.

And he truly would become dead the moment he started resenting Gihun for just existing and holding him back from doing something stupid.

And yet it was something he felt like dying because he wasn’t doing. Feeling like he was letting Saebyeok down every single day for not doing what she had wanted to do.

Revenge.

He could do it. He knew when Sangwoo was on the move. It wouldn’t take him five minutes to get rid of him in a clean cut way. Run away after. At least then his pain would lessen slightly and he won’t feel like he’s letting her down anymore.

But Gihun would always be the shield between him and Sangwoo.

“So, how long do you plan on sitting here?” Mr Park sat down next to him, lighting a cigarette.

“Let me rephrase that. What are you planning on doing now? I heard the case was closed,” he offered him a cigarette but he shook his head and looked at the ground.

“I don’t know.”

He knew. But he couldn’t say it.

“I can never forget what happened to her and I know they were responsible for her death. Even if she made a mistake,” his voice wavered at the last part. “And I-” he hesitated, a part of him unbelieving that he was about to say it out loud for the first time. A part in disbelief and hurt that the first time he’d say it to someone wouldn’t be as a victory but instead saying it as a loss.

“I’m in love with someone who’s so far away…It’s torture watching him every single day, knowing exactly that he feels the same way and perhaps even more.”

He frowns deeply as the guilt shows its ugly face to him in that moment.

“I can see in his eyes that he’s ready to do anything for me.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “But I run away from him at every turn. Because I’m scared of hurting him. I run because I love him…but I’m so tired. Just tired of everything. Every breath I take knowing my sister is no longer there feels like a punishment.”

He felt Mr Park was watching him carefully.

“I understand and if I were you I wouldn’t know what to do either. But at least I’d try my hardest and do everything in my power to keep on living and not dying Inho,” he said it gently. Like he knew about each moment Inho thought about pulling the trigger on himself.

Inho kept staring at the ground. “I have no power left to even try.”

Mr Park pursed his lips and finally realized what Inho couldn’t put into words. “Then leave Inho. Leave this place.”

Inho looked back for the very first time this evening. “That’s what I had been wanting to tell you.”

Mr Park smiled sadly, “I know.”

“You’re leaving?” Gihun turned to face him on the bench, his eyes widening with immediate panic.

Inho nodded carefully, avoiding his eyes. Preferring to stare at the space between them on the bench. “I don’t have a choice Gihun. I can’t stay here anymore.”

“Is that what you really think?” He looked at him desperately, his voice cracking.

Inho didn’t answer

Gihun took a shaky breath and stared at the golden sunset, the peace of the sight only amplified the panicked storm inside him.

“Gihun you know this isn’t some kind of fairytale. I’ll never be able to reach high enough to your way of life and I’ll never forget what happened to my sister. I’ll leave tomorrow morning,” he said lowly, finally looking at him with a frown. A face of someone who made his choice.

Even if it would hurt them both

The mere thought of Inho leaving him, of getting out of his life got him shaking his head instinctively. Just the fear of losing him was enough for his eyes to well up.

“If we had met under any other circumstance,-”

Gihun shook his head quicker, compressing his lips as he fought the tears threatening to fall.

“I swear I would never leave.”

Gihun broke.

“Inho don’t leave,” he whimpered, his eyes stinging. “Please don’t leave me,” he sniffled and pleaded with his eyes. But Inho wouldn’t look back, still staring at the space between them with the same pained frown that grew on him after Saebyeok’s death.

“I thought about leaving without telling you because I knew this would happen.”

Gihun gasped softly, the thought of Inho disappearing without any goodbye scared him more than anything.

“But I couldn’t do it,” he whispered, still looking at the gap between them.

Gihun stared at him desperately, his heart racing and decided to close that gap, throwing himself at Inho, wrapping his arms tightly around his neck and pulling him as close as can be. “Inho please don’t go, don’t leave me.”

He pulled him closer to his chest, burying his head in his shoulder.

Holding on for dear life.

He felt Inho tense and it made him cry more but then even when Inho’s arms finally went and held him by the waist, he could only cry harder.

Ever since he came here, he didn’t feel like he was home. When he came back, everything seemed different but not because everything had changed. It was because he had. He wasn’t the same person he was before he had left to London, before he had lost his dad. And he tried fitting in. He tried molding himself back into someone he’s not anymore. Someone they excepted him to be. But just when he tried, Inho had stumbled into his life. Finding his hiding spot. Finding all of them one by one and he had let him. Because Inho was the only one who saw him for who truly is now, Inho was the only one he felt at ease with. The only one who felt like home.

He’d been struggling, losing sleep over who he really loved and how he was feeling. Feeling conflicted, guilty and torn. But after Inho had said he wanted to leave, it all became clear.

Turns out it was never a question in the first place because he never loved Sangwoo and he only realized it when he fell in love with Inho.

He loves him.

He felt it when he missed him, saw it in his dreams, knew it by the stars in his eyes, realized it right here.

But he only truly realized just how much when he was slipping away.

He loves him desperately

“I love you,” he cried while smiling, the tears falling right by the corner of his outstretched lips. He held him tighter with a desperate grip, hoping to keep him close forever and to stop the inevitable. He smiled as the words finally came out. The very words they had been dancing around, never crossing the line of, but Gihun wanted that line gone and so he smiled as he erased it, because it was the first time he ever told someone he loved them and had meant it with all his heart, knowing that this was it for him. Smiled as he cried because even though it should’ve been a moment of happiness it was one of pure despair.

Because he finally knew what love felt like.

But at what cost had it been?

Inho held him tighter, nose brushing against his hair as he breathed him in.

“I love you too,” he whispered in his hair, burying his head further deeper into him as his own smile widened and the wet flow on his face grew.

Inho loved him

But it wasn’t enough, was it?

He breathed in their scents. Jasmines, daisies and pine. Somehow their combined scent was like that of summer and winter colliding. Light and dark, like a storm right before a rainbow, sweet like honey but turbulent like the scent of a fresh rainstorm.

Even in its sadness, he loved it.

Inho pulled back but he didn’t allow for the distance to grow again. He wouldn’t let it. He refused to pull away, instead placing his forehead against Inho’s. Almost pushing in his force but Inho didn’t resist or pull away. They remained like that. His arms still wrapped around Inho’s neck while Inho’s were still wrapped around his waist.

His eyes were closed, the soft sobbing still continuing.

“I love you so much,” Inho murmured in the small space between them, his breath clashing warm against his lips. “But I can’t stay,” his voice cracked and Gihun’s grip grew tighter.

Gihun took a deep breath and closed the last piece of distance between them, finally kissing Inho.

Their lips brushed softly and he could swear that he felt tears on Inho’s lips.

He wanted them all for himself.

He tilted his head and pressed his lips deeper, feeling Inho’s hands gripping him tightly before one hand left his waist and gripped his chin to angle his face, drawing him in closer. It was right about the moment his own hand left Inho’s neck and buried itself in his hair as their kiss grew rougher and more devastatingly desperate. Inho deepened their kiss, both parting their lips slightly to allow their tongues to touch and the dance to ensue. Gihun whimpered as he felt Inho’s tongue for the very first time, feeling like on cloud nine and drowning all at once.

Inho kissed him roughly

Urgently

Desperately

As though he was apologizing with every touch, every kiss, every flick of the tongue, every time their lips broke apart and collided again. And he accepted them all, letting him pour his sadness and hurt into their kiss while he poured in his desperation as he kissed him back while begging with everything in him that Inho would stay. Begging not to be left behind.

Inho’s finger slid into his hair softly, the kiss slowing and growing more gentle as he sighed between them, the sound swallowed away by Inho.

He melted.

And was the sweetest feeling he ever experienced.

Just Inho and him in their secret place, kissing slowly while the sun set as it cast a golden light over them.

But the sun set all too soon, hiding behind the river after what felt like a too short of a period. Inho pulled back gently, his eyes looking deep into his own, mirroring its shine. Inho glanced at his glistening bruised lips, noticing the nearly invisible string that connected them and looked up again. His eyes not blank or hiding behind indifference anymore but instead looking desperate. Anxious. Regretful.

Inho placed both hands at each side of his face, holding him with care. “I love you,” he murmured it like it was the most valuable thing he had to offer. Something he knew and felt wasn’t enough. Gihun could only lean into his hand as another tear fell.

Inho wiped it away with feather light touch as though it hurt him to see it. “I’m sorry,” he added while his finger continued to stroke his cheek gently.

They stayed like that until Inho found the strength to go, leaving him alone in their secret place.

Later that night he kept pacing and pacing all around the room, his stomach hurting him and making him nauseous that the clock kept ticking. Time wasn’t waiting for him, just going on as he struggled to breathe. Gihun checked the sky and found the stars. They were there but they were dimmed, almost hidden by a cloud.

He sat down on a chair.

He stood up again.

He sat down on the sofa.

He would pace again.

Gihun was barely breathing, his insides panicking that Inho would leave soon. He would lose him. He would just lose him for good this time.

Was he supposed to watch it happen?

How can he just realize how much he loved this man and just let him go? Why, why should he watch him leave and get left behind?

He understood Inho and knew exactly that he couldn’t stay here any longer. It was impossible to stay in the place that took his sister from him and got away with it. How could he fault him? He imagined a future after Inho leaving. Would he just continue pretending? Marry Sangwoo and just go hide at the empty secret place when it all gets too much?

He stood up again, walking to the window. Staring at the stars, he remembered the first night he’d seen them here again. The night Inho went missing.

The night Mrs Kang told him the tale of Mr Park and how his wife had left it all behind for him. How they’d run away never to be seen again until life ran its course and their time together was up when death intervened. He’d found out the second part later but it didn’t make the story any less inspiring. If anything it became more. Because she escaped and lived her life on her own terms until the very last moment, spending it all with the man she loved.

He remembered his own thoughts that night and how he’d wished he’d be brave enough to fight for love when he found it. He smiled sadly. Well he had finally found it.

But was he going to fight for it?

For them

He had admired Mr Park’s wife and respected her bravery. Now he wondered if he could do the same.

Be brave and leave it all behind.

Leave the world of superficiality and classism behind in favour for whatever he got to face with Inho.

A future of uncertainty, but one he’d tackle with Inho. Just them without pretense or mysteries.

If Inho can’t fight for them because of everything he went through then he can be the one to do so.

As the decision was made as he gazed at the stars, finally able to breathe again.

He sat down at his desk and started writing.

Dear Sangwoo,

Before anything, I’m sorry for what I’m about to write. I know how much it will surprise and hurt you, but you deserve to know the truth about how I’m feeling. If I don’t write this, then I’d be lying to you and you don’t deserve that at all because I know how much you love me. I love you too Sangwoo and I appreciate your love and value it. But what I’m sure of now is that I love you like family and that I had only harbored remnants of a silly love from the past. But I can’t make it the type of love I’d have to have for my future husband and partner in life. Trust me, I tried, but a feeling like that doesn’t come through trying. It’s love, Sangwoo and we either feel it or we don’t. It’s never our choice when to fall in love. Perhaps I’m the true loser because I couldn’t love you the same way but I swear it’s beyond my powers. Perhaps I’m a coward for never saying these words to you and instead writing them in this letter. I haven’t spoken to my mom or Junhee or anyone else about this either because I know they’d all argue with logic and rationality. But what I’m doing couldn’t be any further away from rationality. That’s why I ran. Because I’m not strong enough for any confrontation. But I’m also not strong enough to lie to you and myself anymore. So I’ll step away and give you the space you need to forget me so that we don’t end up regretting everything when it’s far too late.

Forgive me Sangwoo. I wish you the best of happiness just like I know you wish it for me too.

Gihun.

After packing his suitcase and looking at his suite one final time, he took a deep determined breath and closed the door behind him. It was nearly dawn, the hotel wasn’t awake yet. He went down the stairs, hoping not to be seen by anyone. The main hall was empty and deadly quiet, making it easy to slip into Sangwoo’s office and drop the letter by his desk. He went quickly outside the hotel just as the sky started brightening.

He smiled, this time not out of despair or sadness or anxiety or even pretense. He smiled from the heart, truly feeling hopeful for the first time in forever. He gripped his suitcase tighter in his hand and started walking towards the station. Leaving his whole old life behind.

He’d miss Junhee, Geumja, his mother, Myunggi, Junho and even Mrs Kang. But still, he was tingling with absolute excitement, looking forward to the moment Inho realized just how much he meant to him. The moment their eyes would meet and they would hug, get on the train, leave this life behind and start a new one.

He expected the nerves and fears to settle in and for him to get cold feet but every step he took felt lighter than the last. Like he was breaking free and finally chasing his happiness.

Inho was his happiness.

He was finally choosing someone himself. Not someone he was promised to when he was young or someone society expected him to choose. Just someone his own heart chose.

And it wasn’t just his heart that chose Inho. It was his entire being. All his feelings, instincts and thoughts wanted to choose him and would do so any day. Over and over again. He doesn’t care what they all thought of him, doesn’t care that they’ll declare him insane for running away from someone who loved him like Sangwoo. Any omega from a rich and esteemed family who ran away was always a scandal. Bound to be disowned and shunned by the family and the upper class while the family faced the disgrace. Stripping him away of any luxury and any good reputation and if they knew that he had even run away with an alpha no less, one of lesser standing then it would be an even bigger scandal. Biggest in the south.

Good thing he doesn’t care a single bit. Not about any luxury or any reputation. He doesn’t care about what’s awaiting them as long they went through it together and he knew that any future with Inho will be worth it.

He reached the train station, his eyes wide with anticipation as he searched for the alpha around the bustling station that got more crowded as daylight started to creep in. He looked to the right and saw him.

He sat there by a table close to the tracks with his back turned to him and a small suitcase next to him. He smiled and took one final deep breath as he approached him nervously, lowering his suitcase next to the table and clutching his hands nervously. “Your decision to leave me-”

Inho turned his head quickly at the sound of his voice, his eyes widening.

“Made me confront myself and I can’t lie to myself anymore,” he smiled, his nose crinkling. “I don’t want to live a single day without you,” he shrugged his shoulder, saying it like it was just a fact instead of a confession.

Inho stood up slowly, his lips parting in a shocked, small disbelieving smile. And what mattered more to him was that Inho’s eyes were smiling too. It made his own smile grow.

“That’s insane,” he breathed out, his eyes not leaving him for a single second. Like he was unsure whether he was real or whether he’d disappear again.

He beamed. “Insanity would be to stay there miserable.” Inho closed his lips in a smile that took his breath away, so small but endlessly sweet and vulnerable. Inho took his hand—still not taking his eyes off him—and led him to the chair next to his. They sat down, still holding hands and staring at one another. Gihun, smiling ear to ear, found nothing sweeter and more rewarding than bringing the smile back to Inho’s face.

“I don’t deserve this. It- this is too much for me Gihun,” he said still smiling while his eyes still looked slightly pained and vulnerable.

He shook his head quickly. “It’s not. We don’t want anything from them. The only thing that matters is us,” he spoke with the same smile, his eyes crinkling in the light. He leaned forward excitedly, “we’ll start a new life, on new grounds. Just us.”

Inho’s smile widened slightly, eyes sparkling in a way he thought he’d lost and just stared. No, gazed at him.

Intensely

Gihun’s lips parted in another beaming smile that crinkled his nose again. “Stop staring at me like that, people are going to notice,” he whispered teasingly.

Inho sounding as serious as ever said, “what people.”

Gihun blushed, chuckling under breath as he looked at his lap in embarrassment. A far cry from yesterday when Inho had his tongue down his thr-

He cleared his throat. “When does the train leave?”

Inho smiled just a tiny bit bigger and was right about to answer when,

“Inho!”

Inho looked away towards the familiar approaching voice of Junho. His smile falling as he noticed that Junho had been running.

“Junho?” He said as he stood up, his hand dropping away from Gihun’s, leaving him instantly cold.

“Thank god I caught you,” he halted in front of the table taking a breath tiredly when he noticed Gihun.

“Gihunssi?” He uttered dumbly, looking out of breath and confused.

Gihun wasn’t smiling anymore, feeling the colors draining from his face as he had a sudden bad feeling.

“Uhm-” Junho looked back at Inho uncomfortably, “detective Park Jungbae asked about you and I told him you’re about to leave but he said to catch you and tell you not to go.”

Inho blinked. “What? Why?” He frowned in confusion.

“They’re reopening Saebyok’s case.”

Silence

Gihun’s heart dropped, looking at the ground where he was sure it fell.

“But he said-” Inho stopped, his entire demeanor changing. Gihun watched it happen in slow motion.

Watched the moment Inho frowned in the same anger and bitterness he’s seen after Saebyeok’s death. Watched the moment the hand that had been holding his warmly clenched into a tight fist until the knuckles turned white. The moment any progress he’d made to make these eyes smile disappeared in one blink of an eye. A dark cloud of vengeance glazing the very eyes that had just looked at him with warmth.

He watched the moment he was losing Inho.

He stood up abruptly, staring at Junho in alarm before smiling shakily at Inho. “Inho,” his hand went to hold his arm, to get his attention. To try. “Inho, let’s go. We’ll miss the train,” he said it in a calm voice. But his eyes were already pleading.

Inho finally looked at him.

It wasn’t the same man from a few moments ago. He looked sad, angry and what’s worse, he was determined.

“Did you not hear that? They’re reopening her case Gihun. I was right, she was murdered,” he repeated it calmly like he hadn’t heard it. Like it made a difference. Made complete sense.

To leave him here.

“And they will investigate it and justice will be served whether you’re here or not,” he raised his eyebrows expectantly, still trying to smile.

Inho frowned at him like his words were the crazy ones. Like Gihun’s suggestion was hurtful. “And you want it to happen while I’m not here?” He argued back, still sounding calm but with an edge of incredulity.

Neither noticed how Junho glanced at both of them anxiously and quietly stepped back. Both were too shocked by one another to notice anything.

“Your presence won’t make a difference,” he argued carefully, his heart on the verge of breaking.

“She’s my little sister, I can’t abandon her like this. Not again. I can’t,” he replied with pained voice.

Gihun stiffened as it dawned on him.

“Put yourself in my place-”

“No, you put yourself in mine,” he interrupted with wide eyes. “Do you know what I did? Do you know what this means for me?” he whispered in shock.

He smiled in disbelief, “Inho, I ran away.”

Inho looked at the ground, looking frozen. He wasn’t even looking at him anymore.

“I ran away to be with you,’ he smiled in horror at the realization that even this huge  sacrifice hadn’t been enough.

He hadn’t been enough.

He breathed in sharply, almost choking on his breath, “I ran away so we could start a new life together.”

Inho still looked at the ground and Gihun’s heart broke. The pain inside him began taking over him as he realized that Inho wouldn’t put him first like he had. Inho wouldn’t meet him halfway and sacrifice just like he had.

“I left Sangwoo a letter telling him that I don’t love him and that I would never go back to him,” he spoke louder as the panic grew.

This got Inho to look back at him in surprise and something deadly. Regret.

“Inho, let’s go. Please,” he pleaded desperately.

Inho stared at the ground like a broken man, torn between the desire for justice for his little sister and the desire to start over. But Gihun felt something in him die the moment he knew it was a lost battle.

Nothing was ever more important than Saebyeok.

Gihun knew that.

But was he truly worth so little to Inho? Was he not worth any sacrifice? Did he mean so little to him? Did he care so little about what would happen to him and how he would feel?

Inho looked up, broken. “I can’t Gihun.”

Breaking his heart was as simple as that.

He got his answer; he was not worth the sacrifice. Inho didn’t care that right in this very second.

He had ended his world.

He flinched back, his hand dropping from Inho’s arm as though he’d been burnt and he had. Gasping in shock as he stared at the man he thought loved him, feeling his entire world crumble by the words and their betrayal.

His chest started rising too fast as he pushed past Inho to get to his bag.

He ran.

Chapter Text

Noeul groaned in annoyance as she heard the same sobbing she’d been hearing the last two weeks. It was coming from her new roommate who had been assigned to her just because Jang Geumja was simply a hateful bitch.

Kim Youngmi

Ever since the night of the masquerade ball, Youngmi had been crying non stop like clockwork and usually she’d ignore her, chalking it up to trauma for being the one to have found the fire and Hwang Saebyeok lying within it. Youngmi was emotional like that and she let her be as long as she was capable of sleeping at night. Being a pregnant woman working a full time job it wasn’t difficult to shut her out. But now Youngmi was crying during daylight, while she was awake and couldn’t pretend to be sleeping or simply ignore it.

It was going too far.

“Will you stop crying now? What’s wrong with you it was just a fire,” she said tiredly as she sat up in her bed.

Youngmi sniffled. “I’m sorry. I just wish she would forgive me,” she whispered underneath her breath but loud enough her to hear it.

She frowned.

This sounded interesting.

“Youngmi honey, tell me what’s wrong. You could never hurt anyone,” she let her pheromones into the room, knowing the scent of a pregnant omega made it easier for people to relax.

And let down their guard.

She sat down next to her on the bed, placing an arm around her shoulders. “No one needs to forgive you for anything. If anything people apologize to you most times because you’re so sweet,” she teased as she pinched her cheek.

“No-,” she choked up again and Noeul resisted rolling her eyes in frustration.

“Honey just tell me. It’s about the masquerade fire isn’t it,” she tried again sweetly.

Youngmi nodded

Finally progress.

“I swore not to tell anyone-”

“I’m not anyone. I’m your roommate and your friend,” she interrupted before this goes nowhere.

“Will you promise not to say-”

“I promise.”

“I- I caused Saebyeok’s death,” as soon as she said it, she started crying again.

Noeul froze, looking at her wide eyed.

That was not what she had expected.

“H- how? What do you mean?”

Youngmi started crying again before taking a deep breath and beginning to talk.

“I was downstairs during the party, helping in the kitchen but I decided to head back to the room for a quick break. I knew Ms Jang wouldn’t pay attention. On my way back, I came across a woman wearing a burgundy dress and a mask. I didn’t recognize her at first and was just confused why a guest was downstairs in the staff quarters. But then she called me by the nickname she had given me back when we worked together.

“Mimi, did you forget me?” She smirked as she walked closer.

“Saebyeok?” Youngmi smiled in surprise.

She nodded back with a smile.

“I tried asking her what she was doing here and told her that she looked like a beautiful heiress but she only chuckled and instead asked me for a favour. She handed me a letter, telling me to keep it with me for the next fifteen minutes and you know I never learned to read so I just kept it and didn’t even try opening it. She said she’d meet me in front of the laundry room in fifteen minutes, I kept repeating it so I wouldn’t forget- I did what she wanted.”

Youngmi clenched her eyes tightly as she struggled not to cry.

“When fifteen minutes passed I couldn’t find her in the hallway. I looked and waited until I saw a half open door. It was the room that was adjoined next to the laundry room. I pushed it completely open and saw her lying on the ground with a pool of blood behind her head. She was dead. She must have been. She wasn’t moving at all but before I could scream for help Madame Seong appeared out of nowhere. She- she stood in front of me staring at her.

“You killed her,” she said coldly.

“She wasn’t asking. She just accused me and I started begging and swearing that I hadn’t. But she wouldn’t listen. She kept threatening me. But then-”

She sobbed as she spoke, the guilt eating at her.

“She told me to shut up and to help her carry Saebyeok to the laundry room. When we came into the room it was already starting to burn. I- I- had to carry her body with Madame Seong and put her in the fire.”

She broke down, sobbing heavily as her shoulder shook.

Noeul could only watch her with an open mouth.

Did Madame Seong kill Saebyeok?

“I had to pull her body into that room- and I had to clean the blood on the floor in the other room. I did this…Madame Seong told me I’ll go to prison if I said anything.”

Noeul took her in her arms as she cried, mouth still hanging open in shock.

“Where- where is that letter? Do you still have it?” She looked down at her, still shocked.

She nodded.

“Show me,” she said almost immediately. Feeling a certain sense of anticipation.

What did Saebyeok have that caused Madame Seong to kill her or have someone do it?

Her eyes narrowed as Youngmi got it from her drawer.

Noeul took it quickly, turning away to read it as Youngmi cried quietly behind her. She read it with an open mouth and yet it continued to widen the longer she read.

She looked up from the letter.

Her jaw slack and eyes owlish.

“What does it say?” Came Youngmi’s small shaky voice from behind.

Noeul closed her mouth quickly, “I don’t know. I don’t get it at all.” She turned back to Youngmi, stashing the letter away in her pocket before hugging her tightly. “Honey you did nothing wrong at all. You could never do anything wrong. I- I’ll burn that letter and we’ll forget it ever happened,” she lied easily.

She could feel Youngmi hugging her tightly and sniffling. She stroked her hair, eyes still wide in shock.

She smirked slowly.

Let the games begin.

Inho remained frozen in place, staring at the emptiness in front of him. His instincts telling him to run after the man he’d just broken, the one who loved him enough to leave everything behind. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t move. Because the image of his sister was right in front of him, scared and fighting for her life when someone overpowered her and took that very life away, letting her burn. The image of her burning dress as she was carried away from him for the last time was right there in front of his eyes, so how could he go after Gihun when she called for him? How could he possibly leave, never getting to see her killer be brought to justice. He knew he just broke Gihun’s heart, he knew it. But what about hers? She had just left him two weeks ago, so how can Gihun expect him to leave so easily when he finally had the chance to see someone being held accountable? Didn’t he at least deserve that? When all this place ever did was break him and her, why couldn’t he for once watch it break back?

He’d hurt Gihun, his head kept echoing.

No, he’d broken him, broken his trust and everything good between them.

A hand squeezed his shoulder, snapping him out of his misery.

“Inho, let’s go to the precinct,” Junho said carefully, guiding him with a hand on his arm like he needed pulling to move.

And he did.

They remained silent the whole way as he grappled with the fact that his heart was broken.

Because he broke Gihun’s.

He entered the detective’s office, the man’s face lighting up at seeing him. “Good that Junho caught you. Sit down,” he said with his signature smile.

He sat numbly, feeling stiff and tense in his own skin.

“How did you reopen the case? You said it’s over,” he said emotionlessly.

“I’ve done the impossible to get it reopened. I got permission from higher ups the Seongs can’t reach this time,” he smirked slightly as he leaned back in his chair. “Now here’s what we know. Saebyeok disappeared and told you she’d demand a price in return for some letter that threatened the ownership of the hotel, correct?” He raised one eyebrow expectantly.

He nodded stiffly.

“The price was probably the brooch found next to her at the scene-”

“Which means it could only be one of those she blackmailed that killed her. The Seongs are the only ones that had any motive to kill her,” he interjected, not knowing if the detective had the balls to say it or not.

So he did it for him.

The detective barely smirked and then looked at him seriously, “and that is why we’ll need to prove that someone killed her. We need to conduct an autopsy and examine her body.”

The words made him want to throw up.

They would dig her up again, and examine her coldly, placing her on a steel table and only see her as another body in the morgue.

His little sister

He looked away, willing his face not to react. Trying his hardest not to break in the precinct.

He nodded again.

“We’ll work quietly this time, until it’s too late for them to do something about it. Alright?”

Another stiff nod.

He left the precinct, somehow feeling emptier than before.

Gihun was about to have a panic attack, walking back in the hard cruel daylight. Walking back to the place he was so willing to leave behind just an hour ago. He felt a shiver of cold hit him even as the sun stared at him directly. The day had started and he knew exactly what that meant.

Sangwoo had definitely read the letter by now. The fear of this very thought made him want to go somewhere else where he could just simply end it all. Because each light step he had taken earlier that had felt like freedom now felt like oppression and he wanted, no needed to cry and breakdown but he couldn’t. He had to deal with consequence of Inho’s choice, his life now altered because of something outside of his own control.

Inho didn’t just break his heart today, he changed his life forever and as he walked back reeling from one alpha’s choice he was walking towards another alpha awaiting his choice as well. Like a verdict of a prisoner knowing he wouldn’t be shown mercy.

Inho hadn’t shown mercy

And Sangwoo wouldn’t either.

He started hyperventilating as the Grand came back into view. He was an omega that had run away from his fiancé. Escaped, never to be seen again. He’d broken Sangwoo’s heart in a letter, sacrificing him for his heart.

But his heart had betrayed him.

How could he do this to him? How could he be so willing to break his heart?

Why did he not care a single bit about how he’d feel and see that this would shatter his whole world. He tried to put them on trial in his mind, trying to make it easier for himself. The scale on each of their sides was heavy, each with their reasons.

One to stay

One to go

But he couldn’t think of Inho’s scale when it was just full with vengeance, anger and bitterness. His had been full of love. Hope that Inho had thrown away, breaking him and leaving him to pick up the pieces that he wasn’t sure he could ever restore back to shape.

His inner omega instincts were not even wailing, or sobbing in a corner in the back of his mind, they were completely stunned by Inho’s abandonment. He was so shocked that all his feelings and instincts were frozen in place. Shocked that what was supposed to be the start of new life ended up being- well it was a start of new life alright.

Just his biggest nightmare.

His insides were utterly numbed to prepare for whatever Sangwoo decided because he was about to be sentenced with cruelty for the second time that day and he knew that he had no choice but to accept any verdict Sangwoo was about to inflict.

Inho had just ruined his life and he knew it before even reaching the hotel.

He swallowed the big lump in his throat and forced himself to calm down. He entered the hotel with his entire body on edge. Heading straight for Sangwoo’s office.

He placed his suitcase before the door and swallowed down the whimper building in his throat. He opened the door with a shaky hand.

Sangwoo stood with his back turned to him, in his hand a glass of whisky. He glanced to the desk and didn’t find the letter.

He felt like choking.

Sangwoo turned around slowly and stared at him.

Then smiled.

His heart dropped, a sudden cold feeling overtaking him as he forced himself to smile back. Sangwoo came closer, bringing a hand up and caressing his face gently. He couldn’t breathe. “Do you know what I was just thinking of?”

He shook his head with the same plastic half fearful smile.

“That we should marry soon,” he told him as he continued to caress his face. “In fact very soon,” he grinned.

Sangwoo then pulled him into a tight hug that didn’t feel affectionate but rather desperate and possessive, punishing in its force. Gihun looked around the room, still frozen before his eyes landed on the crumpled letter on the floor.

He knew everything

Sangwoo pulled back, grinning at him before pulling him into a deep kiss that was just as desperate as he himself had been not a day ago. Gihun clenched his eyes shut, realizing that they were both doomed to be desperate for someone who didn’t love them back.

And so the verdict became clear.

Getting married.

And he had no choice but to comply as he kissed him back.

He went upstairs to his room, shutting the door with a loud thud that echoed in the empty space. He let the suitcase drop to the ground, hearing another faint thud. The curtains of the seating room were all still closed, leaving him to stand in a dimmed darkness that matched how he saw the world.

Dark

He stood frozen in place in front the door, head low as he stared at the ground in numb shock. His throat felt dry as the air entered through his slightly gaping mouth.

He stood there speechless, barely breathing until a single tear fell. The tear turned into a steady stream and yet he couldn’t feel it.

He couldn’t feel anything at all.

Everything in him was still stunned. It was the kind of shock you can only get when you’ve trusted someone so much, only for them to betray and break it. It was the result of a betrayal that one would’ve never seen coming, one that slows time and breaks the spirit down in a way where moving becomes too much.

He loosened his tie numbly, feeling like he was suffocating in his own room.

What had Inho done to him?

He was going to marry Sangwoo.

There was no choice.

Leaving the Grand was something he knew he couldn’t do again. What for? For his happiness?

What happiness?

What peace?

It was all gone. Inho had thrown all of it away.

He sat down on the sofa, eyes shining with tears as they continued to fall down his numb face. Inho couldn’t have truly loved him. If he had then he wouldn’t have sacrificed him today. He felt abandoned, betrayed, rejected and so very numb.

Time went by as he couldn’t see through his misty eyes. He stayed frozen in place for what must have been hours, letting endless trains of tears fall.

He didn’t move, didn’t speak to anyone.

He was frozen.

Hyunju knocked on the door, asking on behalf of his mother if he was alright and whether he would come to dinner. He was barely able to say that he needed to rest and that he didn’t want to be disturbed today.

She had looked concerned.

He didn’t notice.

Gihun kept sitting, trying to think it all through. Replaying the day over and over again. It hurt to try to think of Inho’s reasonings and justification but he still tried.

Thinking of how Inho had lost his only sister, his only family member in such a brutal way that might involve his own family. He knew he stayed for her. He knew Inho hadn’t done it to hurt him.

But it still did.

It hurt so much that he couldn’t feel.

But right when he’d begin to entertain Inho’s reasons, a voice would yell at him saying that he always thought of Inho’s perspective whenever something happened. He always put himself in his shoes. Even when he had almost killed Sangwoo. So why the hell would Inho not do that just for once?

Why did he not even try to imagine how his choice would impact him? Did he not know that he had just condemned him to a life of misery? Or did he not care?

The suite had turned completely dark when a loud knock broke the silence.

Another knock came,

Then another, each more insistent and forceful than the last.

He pulled himself up with difficulty and opened it. In front of him stood Sangwoo, reeking of alcohol. His eyes were glistening with tears as he stared with an unfocused frown. Sangwoo stepped into the dark room, each step borderline unbalanced while his eyes remained focused on him. Gihun felt like a trapped prey as he took a step back.

“Do you remember how I got this scar?” He pointed to a scar on his hand as he walked another step closer. “Back then, you used to play with a teddy bear. You’d play with it by the river and I’d keep an eye on you,” he whispered sluggishly with a smile that made his eyes shine harder in the darkness. “One day, it it- fell into the water and you started screaming’ nd crying,” he let out a breathless chuckle as he came to stand right in front of him.

“Without thinking, I found myself jumping into the water to get it,” he frowned suddenly while Gihun tried not to breakdown at the sight. “I didn’t even notice that my hand had gotten hurt. All I cared about was get- getting you your b- bear so you wouldn’t be sad anymore. So y- you would smile again. Remember?” He grinned as one tear fell.

“I gave it you and- and stood next to you all wet and bleeding. I felt a cold shiver down my spine right- right when I felt like dying. Remember?” Gihun could only nod stiffly with wide eyes, feeling even more broken than before.

Sangwoo’s face hardened. “It was the same cold shiver I felt when I read your letter today and if you hadn’t come back I- I would’ve died,” he said harshly as another tear fell.

Gihun broke, “Sangwoo I’m so sorry-”

“Sshhh. Don’t- I don’t want you to apologize and I don’t want you to tell me why you did this to me,” he muttered with a sad shaky voice. Sounding just as broken as him, making him realize that he had gotten his karma for what he had done to Sangwoo. The same day, the same hour. He’d broken Sangwoo in a cruel way and he got served the same exact poison right after.

“All- all I want is for you to promise me that you will never do this to me again. Do you see now how much I love you?” He came even closer, their faces just an inch apart.

Gihun couldn’t breathe, he felt like he was the oppressor and the oppressed all at once. Like he and Sangwoo were torturing each other at the same time.

He hadn’t even noticed that he started crying. “If I had the courage to do it then I would’ve, but I couldn’t.” His voice came out cracked and shaky like the lie he said. He had to lie. He could never tell Sangwoo that he would’ve turned his back on him without thinking or feeling the despair he’s feeling from Sangwoo now. He would never have stopped and thought about how much he’d hurt Sangwoo. Even if he had then he wouldn’t have understood the extent of his pain and feeling of betrayal. He could only realize it and understand it now that he had gone the through the same kind of betrayal.

He looked at Sangwoo desperately, trying to be more truthful. “I came back because I realized you love me the most in this whole world and-”

Sangwoo shook his head drunkenly with a petulant frown. “No. You came back because you also love me and because you worried about how I’d die if you stayed away from me right?”

“Right Gihun?!” He asked louder and Gihun flinched, snapping and feeling all his resistance and every branch of rebellion inside him break. Broken down by Sangwoo’s pain. By what he’d done to him.

“You’re right. You’re right Sangwoo, you’re right, you’re right,” he answered loudly with a cracked voice, shaking as more tears continued to fall.

He wouldn’t resist anymore. He wouldn’t fight or say no or escape. Seeing what he had done to Sangwoo and seeing what Inho had done to him, something in him just broke today. Taking away every small will to live and fight for anything.

Why should he? How can he?

They’d broken his spirit.

Sangwoo took him in his arms, shushing his sobs as he stroked his hair. He couldn’t stop crying, couldn’t stop staring at the ground.

Horrified

Broken

Tired

Sangwoo pulled back. His hands holding his trembling face, his eyes gazing at his lips as he smiled before kissing him.

Gihun stood in the darkness with tears in his eyes, letting himself get kissed by a man he’d broken.

Sangwoo pulled back, smiling again.

“When’s our wedding?”

“Whenever you want.”

Sangwoo let out a relieved sigh before placing their foreheads together, almost losing his balance due to the alcohol. They stood there letting the sounds of breathing and sobbing become one and the same. Sangwoo pulled him into another kiss, deeper and more desperate than the last and Gihun could taste his anguish just as he could taste the whiskey on his lips. Sangwoo pulled back with a smile, whispering good night whilst giving him a kiss on the cheek. Stumbling back out of the room without any grace.

Gihun closed the door behind him and finally broke away from the numbness.

Finally breaking down.

“You didn’t love him Inho.”

Inho looked at Mr Park, frowning at the sentence, wishing it was true.

“I do. Of course I do.”

“If you had, then you wouldn’t have done that,” Mr Park said as he took another smoke.

“Don’t you understand what I found out? What it means for her?” He argued calmly, trying to be right. To numb the pain of hurting Gihun.

“The idea of vengeance overtook the idea of love in your mind. The idea of a future and the sacrifice he made for you.” Inho looked away, feeling his chest clench at all the things he sacrificed today. His heartbreak and guilt towards Saebyeok overrode everything else. Not making him see that he had ruined what he had with Gihun.

But as much as the guilt and hurt pained him, a part of him couldn’t quite regret it.

He was a brother at the end of the day.

A brother before anything else came along.

If anything there was an irrational part that was hurt by Gihun. Hurt that Gihun thought it was that easy to abandon Saebyeok’s rights and memory. But every time he felt that anger, the guilt and the sin of what he had done would overshadow it instantly.

“What did you want me to do? Leave and let her death be a waste. Never find out what happened to her? How can anyone watch their little sister get killed brutally and be expected to just leave her behind?”  He couldn’t ever imagine it. He had only wanted to leave because he thought it was hopeless. Because he was helpless. But now suddenly there is hope for her and Inho couldn’t leave it even if he had to sacrifice the hope for his own life for it.

Mr Park sighed, his silence admitting the difficulty of it all. “Look it’s all choices and you made yours. Now you have to deal with the consequences of that choice just like he has to deal with his. May he have the patience and strength to deal with what you did,” he muttered and even though he hadn’t said it with malice, Inho still looked away in shame.

It haunted him all day and night. His anger at himself carrying itself along with everything else he’d been carrying inside since he’d lost her. So many questions pounded his head but one soared higher than the others.

Where does one go from here?

The next day Inho headed towards the secret place, walking in the sun but not feeling its overbearing heat. The real dread and fatigue was from what was about to come.

What would he say?

What would Gihun say?

How badly had he broken them?

He stopped his steps when he spotted Gihun sitting on the bench, hands crossed as he stared at the sun unmovingly. Inho swallowed and hurried down the stairs.

He needed to apologize.

Gihun didn’t react to his presence, still staring ahead blankly.

“Gihun-”

“Don’t.” He interrupted with a cold voice that froze him in place. It was a coldness that didn’t suit him and one that he’d never heard before. “Don’t ever say my name again,” he ordered as he finally looked up at him with anger and a coldness that shook him in even in the glaring sun. “No one is allowed to be here but me.”

“I’m sorry-”

“Sorry? You-” Gihun’s wide eyes went cold, instead looking at him in disgust. “No, I’m sorry I wasted my time on someone like you.”

Inho couldn’t breathe, standing frozen as his words landed stronger than any punch could.

“But you did your part and you made me realize that I don’t love you. I never did.”

Cold, clinical. Like a fact that’s meant to break his heart.

“Now leave,” he said still looking with a gaze of steel. Gihun saying these things while looking directly at him made it clear that he wasn’t lying. That it was easy for him to say.

That he meant it.

He had lost Gihun and Gihun had lost him too.

“Leave!” He said loudly, the cold edge never leaving his voice. “And I don’t want to see you around me again.” Inho felt his chest burning in hurt at the hostility, even knowing he’d caused this he still felt like Gihun wasn’t being entirely fair in this situation. Can’t he see that this had hurt him too? Gihun’s words and coldness made a part of him feel as though he was being treated unfairly by someone who he thought understood him better than anyone else. However then he’d look at Gihun’s eyes and see the heartbreak in them and realize that he had no one to blame but himself.

“That’s an order.” he glared at him with finality, hurting him right where he knew it would bruise the most. Reminding him of every difference between them.

The cold reminder that Gihun was so far above him and had finally realized it, weaponizing it against him, made him just nod slighlty in numbness before quickly walking away, leaving Gihun’s secret place for the last time even if it broke his heart.

Because if Gihun decided that that was what they are from here on out, just an owner and his employee then he would accept it. He would accept Gihun hurting him and putting every boundary there is.

If that’s his punishment then so be it, he thought as he walked away, unknowing that Gihun started crying the moment he’d gone.

A week passed and every single day kept feeling like a punishment. Gihun woke up, dressed, ate, listened, nodded and smiled when he needed to.

And every time had felt like pain.

He’d gone everyday, without ever allowing himself to think about that train station and the moment his life had changed. He’d distract himself with anything else and even though he should notice more things because of it, he keeps zoning out around others despite his best efforts. Like he was a doll that would break occasionally, freezing in pain from the strings tugging at him before slipping back into the role mindlessly.

He hadn’t seen Inho the last week either. Well, he had felt him more than seen him. Inho was trying his hardest to follow his order and keep his distance but sometimes he couldn’t help it, for instance when he was having dinner in the main hall and Inho was stationed there. There they couldn’t avoid each other’s existence. Though, he would never look at him and he didn’t have to look to know that Inho wasn’t looking back either. He’ll do his job with his head down and keep as much distance as he can.

Gihun didn’t know how to feel about it. A side of him was satisfied that he’d finally broken free from the hold Inho had over him and satisfied that he had hurt him just as much while another side protested that he hadn’t broken free and that he was just fooling himself. Denying his real desire to be closer even if it hurt.

He had asked for the distance, he knows that. He had ended everything that day in their secret place and he did feel better sometimes because there were moments where he could pretend for just a second that he never knew Inho. That he didn’t exist beyond the image in his dreams. But it was just a second. Otherwise Inho would always haunt his mind whenever he felt like the role of the mindless marionette was too hard.

Inho had been his person. The one he felt he could be himself with in this place.

The only one

And he took that away with him that day when he left the secret place. It hurt more than usual when he thought about the fact that he hadn’t simply lost someone he cared about. Someone he loved. He also lost a confidante.

A friend.

He’d sit in the secret place alone whenever he felt on the verge of having a panic attack. He had them sometimes, now more often than ever before. He was lucky Junhee had walked into his room when he felt like his chest was closing up for good this time. He’d laughed it off later, saying it’s wedding nerves.

The wedding

Another one of the reasons behind his panic attacks.

Sangwoo had gone back to being the perfect gentleman and fiancé. Never showing any trace of the pain Gihun had seen that night. All happy about their wedding being in a month.

Like he forgot all about it.

God, he envied that. How he wished he could forget everything as well or at the very least pretened as well as Sangwoo was. Without ever breaking.

But how can he pretend when Inho is still here?

How can he pretend when he still felt his eyes twitching to follow Inho’s shadow around whenever he was around? Or when he felt close to him just by being in the same place he’d been working in the previous hour? How when found himself so damn close to calling him over to their secret place and saying that he hadn’t meant it when he said he doesn’t love him?

He still sat in the secret place almost every night and tried his damn hardest to never look at any night sky. He’d even closed every curtain at night, unwilling to check for stars and never knowing whether he feared them being there or not.

He was sitting silently in his mother’s terrace, listening to her describe how grandeur the wedding has to be and how it would help restore the Grand’s reputation. Junhee sat opposite him and was frowning as well, also barely listening. Gihun glanced at her during the daily dose of torture and found her frowning and unfocused as usual. He’d also noticed how she would look at their mother with anger and something that felt like disgust. He knew something wasn’t right between them ever since her fall from stairs but this was different. More exterme and open. When he tried to ask her what was wrong, she wouldn’t give him any answer, just muttering something about the mood swings of pregnancy. So, he’d chosen to ignore it, his own problems being too much for him to even pay attention.

His mother looked annoyed, her cheerful mood slipping immediately as she saw detective Park Jungbae get out of his car and smirk at her all the way from the street.

“That man again. I need to get him fired at this point,” she said coolly, not falling for the bait of showing any aggression. His mother was too calculated to show emotions. He however frowned at her before looking over to Junhee.

Junhee was looking at their mom, face pale.

“I- I need to go. Excuse me,” she stood up quickly and leaving. They both watched her go and when he turned to his mother with a confused frown, she didn’t show any emotions again.

Something was wrong here.

He needs to find out.

He can’t ignore it anymore.

They went to Sangwoo’s office, insisting on joining the meeting. He needed to see what happened, needed to know so he could let Inho know as well.

He shook his head mindlessly as they walked. He was still thinking of him.

Like a god damn fool.

But this was bigger than them.

It was Saebyeok.

And maybe Sangwoo?

He shut his mind up as he sat down in the room to the annoyance of Sangwoo. Detective Park merely smiled at him before his mother started complaining again.

“Madame Seong, unfortunately I have to interrupt you. This case is no longer inactive and is no longer considered an accident. Hwang Saebyeok’s case has been reopened and an autopsy has been conducted. The coroner confirmed that the victim has been hit in the head with a sharp object, proving that we are dealing with a homicide.”

Gihun frowned sadly as he stared at the ground. He wondered whether Inho knew and how he was feeling. He glanced at Sangwoo and found him smoking blankly like he’s so far above this topic and above the detective.

He hated being in this room. But he had to. For-

“What crime? What sharp object? I believe our district is so peaceful with such a very low crime rate, that you naturally have lots of time on your hands and you don’t know what to do with it, so you spend it on bothering us,” she mocked him cruelly. Gihun winced at her words. God he didn’t appreciate nor agree with his mother’s ways at all.

“No ma’am. I have much more important things to do. Anyways, I have a permission to investigate this case and as I said, Saebyeok was hit in the head. So she didn’t simply fall and suffocate. Unless you want to tell me that she hit herself in the head?” He smirked at both, glancing at Sangwoo specifically. Gihun looked at him as well and saw the façade of indifference crack slighlty.

“I won’t allow you to affect the hotel’s reputation anymore. Even if you go to the highest higher ups,” she said almost threateningly as she placed both hands on the table and stared at the detective with underlying hatred.

The detective only smirked wider. “I actually did exactly that and until you can stop me- that is if you can this time, I will be doing my job starting now.”

“Detective Park, no one is stopping you from doing your job. On the contrary, we have the same goal-,” Sangwoo stepped in to deescalate with a smile.

Suddenly, the door opened and Myunggi stepped in. Gihun looked at him as he walked slowly and sat down next to him, directly opposite the detective.

“That goal is for us to reach the truth and to close this chapter forever. And to prove that you, I will assist you anyway I can,” he carried on with a friendly smile. Looking over at him with the same smile once he looked away from the detective.

Gihun tried to smile back but all he could think about were the lies he’d fed him before. Denying ever having anything with Saebyeok, lying to him over and over again, dodging questions.

Oh god who was he marrying again?

Gihun looked at the ground, trying to focus on it so he wouldn’t break down right here. Everything Inho had done made him forget everything Sangwoo had done as well.

One thing Inho did overshadowed the hunderds of things Sangwoo had done.

Because when Inho had done what he did, it hurt a million times more.

Because he actually loved him.

But then he remembered that dark night where Sangwoo broke down in front of him, because of him. Who should he believe, he truly didn’t know…

“Thank you Mr Cho, however I will not require any of your help. Because unfortunately, you’re all suspects,” he said professionally as he stared at everyone in the room. Gihun only saw the smile fall from Sangwoo’s face.

“Suspects? Do you know what you’re saying?” His mother mocked again with a incredulous smile.

“I know exactly what I’m saying because this is my job ma’am,” he smirked but this time there was a challenging spark in his eyes. “Everyone in the hotel that night is a suspect in this murder case. And it is a murder ma’am,” he repeated pointedly.

Sangwoo huffed in disbelief. “What does everyone mean?”

“It means everyone that was in the hotel Mr Cho,” he repeated it to him like he was idiot and like he wasn’t afraid of what he was telling them. Gihun almost wanted to smile.

He felt grateful that Inho had this man’s support.

“The owners, the employees, the guests and all the attendees of your party,” he stressed the final two, knowing that this is exactly what would hurt them the most. His mother would only lose her mind if it involved all the rich guests and high profile people. This could ruin the Grand and even though it hurt, Gihun still felt grateful that at least Inho could be closer to what he desperately needed.

Closure.

“I will check every corner of the hotel and check for fingerprints and that’s not all. I’ll talk to everyone I already talked to before. Told you it’s a murder,” he smirked at the pale faces in front of him and Gihun could only admire him for it. If Inho decided to sacrifice their future for this, then at least they can find out everything.

“You must be joking,” Sangwoo chuckled in disbelief.

“This will never happen,” his mother looked menacingly.

“Of course it won’t,” Sangwoo repeated firmly this time, no longer smiling. Reminding Gihun just how quickly he can change his tone.

“It will and it will all be official,” the detective replied lazely, almost bored with this debate.

“Sir you don’t need to do any of this,” Myunggi added in, looking more tired than he’d ever seen him.

“Of course I will. I need to know who killed Saebyeok,” the detective turned his attention to Myunggi.

“It was me. I killed Saebyeok.”

Chapter Text

Gihun looked at the man next to him in horror, mouth dropping at Myunggi’s confession. Out of all the people he would’ve suspected, it wouldn’t have been Myunggi. His brother in law was a kind and borderline docile person. So him being behind this didn’t make any damn sense.

But another thing came to mind instantly. Was that why he was so broken over Saebyeok’s death?

But what does he have to do with Saebyeok?

He looked back towards the others in the room, observing everyone’s surprise as time stood still in the moment. Even the smirking detective had paused at the revelation, no longer smiling. He only leaned forward with a careful frown, his eyes glancing towards Sangwoo and his mother before going back to Myunggi, deep with suspicion. He finally ended the prolonged silence.

“If that’s so then I’ll need you to show me what happened that night. Walk me through it,” he said briskly while standing up.

Everyone who had been sitting stood up after him dumbly, trailing behind the detective and Myunggi as they headed downstairs. “Gihun maybe you should-”

“No. I will come with you. Don’t bother,” he interrupted Sangwoo firmly, not sparing him a glance as he stared at the back of Myunggi’s head with a frown.

They went to the laundry room, clearing it out quickly.

Myunggi walked around the room and started recounting the events of that night.

“I heard that Madame Seong was tired and had called for a doctor in her room during the party. I went to check on her and found out that she had caught Hwang Saebyeok stealing the diamond brooch from her room and that she was the reason behind her sudden dizziness and why she had called for a doctor. She said that Hwang Saebyeok escaped with the brooch. So I tried to run after her and I guess I had a feeling that she would head down to the employees area. I guess it was just more empty compared to upstairs. Anyway I found her in the room next to the laundry.”

—————————————————————

“Mom? Are you alright?” Junhee hurried to her side upstairs after the doctor left. She had seen her stand frozen next to a table after someone had bumped into her. Junhee had to call a doctor for her after guiding her upstairs.

“I- I need to go downstairs. Bring me my diamond brooch,” she said as she stumbled upright off the bed.

“What why? What happened?”

“Doesn’t concern you.”

“Mom I’ll come with you-”

“No.”

Junhee watched her go before deciding to follow her mother regardless, making sure not to be seen and waiting a few minutes before daring to step into the hallway she’d seen her walk towards. As she approached the dark hallway, she heard sounds of a struggle and the moment she dared to get into the room, legs shaking, she saw her mother striking a woman with a glass bottle, the sound of it shattering against her head, stopping her dead in her tracks.

“M- mom?” She gasped in fear. Her mother looked up at her from the floor, her eyes wild as she stood up and stepped away from the limp body in front of them.

“She was about to kill me. I was defending myself,” she tried to sound composed but the wild look still wouldn’t leave her face as she glanced back down at the girl.

“Who- who a-an-and why?”

“It’s that girl Hwang Saebyeok. She was blackmailing me.”

“What? How?”

“Junhee. It doesn’t matter now. I need you to go back upstairs and forget all of this. Understood?” Her mother looked at her sternly until she finally stumbled back out of the room with shaking hands and ran back upstairs.

She looked around the ballroom in shock until she spotted Myunggi. She pulled him upstairs to their suite and in her panic, looked at him desperately.

“Myunggi. I kil- I- I killed someone.”

——————————————————————

“I tried to get the brooch from her. That’s when she said that she will burn the whole place down and that she will kill my family and everyone else this way. When I tried to get past her to the laundry room to stop the fire, she attacked me with a glass bottle she had grabbed. So I fought back and I- I hit her in the head accidentally.”

Gihun clenched his eyes shut in pain, not bearing to imagine the sight of her dead body and Inho finding her.

“I panicked and pulled her body into the fire,” he said with his head down, shame in his voice. Gihun simply couldn’t believe that he would do that.

The detective had his eyes narrowed as he listened and followed Myunggi with attentiveness. When there was nothing else to show, he glanced at the quiet Sangwoo and sighed before looking back at Myunggi. “I hereby arrest you for the murder of Hwang Saebyeok. You have the rig-”

Gihun looked at the ground numbly as the detective placed Myunggi in handcuffs and followed them back upstairs as the detective assistant Kang Daeho took Myunggi by the arm, to guide him out of the hotel.

When they reached the main hall he found Junhee crying by the staircase with their mother standing next to her silently. She tried to hug Myunggi but Kang Daeho pushed him forward towards the main entrance. He took his place next to Junhee as she sobbed, her big belly in front of her as she grabbed it almost too tightly. He tried to ease her grip and stroked her hair gently, his eyes watering at the sight of her. Then he looked up and saw Inho standing on the opposite side of the main hall, blankly watching Myunggi being led out of the hotel before looking back at them.

He kept his grief filled eyes on Inho, watching as Junho came to stand close next to Inho and stroked his arm gently with a sad frown, comforting him as much as he could in public.

When Inho looked at him, he couldn’t stop the irrational hardened edge his face took. Like it was his fault that his pregnant sister was suffering. Inho only looked back blankly as though Gihun couldn’t even hurt him anymore than he already was.

And Gihun knew he was unfair.

Because on one side of the big room stood the brother of the victim, staring silently and feeling the sting of grief all over again while on the other side stood the family of the killer, comforting the pregnant Junhee. Both with someone on their side trying to silently comfort them even when it was useless as it could never stop any pain.

Both sides were losers in his eyes.

Gihun looked away the moment his instincts screamed at him to go comfort Inho. The moment it became too hard to stand here while knowing that Inho was hurt too. He needed to hug him, to tell him he was sorry. To say that he was right beside him in his toughest battles.

But he hadn’t been. He couldn’t be.

He had promised himself he wouldn’t be after that day. The hurt of that day was the only thing that made him strong enough to look away and swallow down the feelings that threatened to come right back up.

He wouldn’t open that chapter again.

They had hurt each other enough hadn’t they?

“Junhee please calm down, this isn’t good for you or the baby,” he tried to get her to stop sobbing in her room the past hour but it was useless. If anything the mention of their baby seems to upset her more.

Their mother came to sit down in the chair in front of Junhee. She glanced at him with casual indifference. “Gihun, go downstairs. Sangwoo is looking for you.”

“But-”

“I’ll stay with your sister.”

She wasn’t asking and Gihun knew that he was being dismissed but this time—unlike all other previous times where he just let it go and left—something in him insisted on staying, on trying to listen to this conversation somehow. Funny how he only got that urge since it involved Inho and Saebyeok. He pretended to close the door, feigning the sound of the door clicking before gently pushing it back open just a few centimeters. Just enough to barely make out some words. But he would take it anyway.

“What was that?” He could hear his mother’s annoyed tone more than the words themselves.

“He did it for us,” came Junhee’s sobbing voice almost as a whisper. Gihun frowned at the sentence, a dark feeling overtaking him. Did she mean he committed the crime for them?

Or did she mean that he confessed for them?

Gihun’s stomach dropped at either option.

“But how did he know-” a pause,“you told him?”

Gihun could only hear Junhee’s faint sobbing.

“I didn’t ask for this stupidity. The case was bound to be closed anyway and it would’ve been over. God-” he heard his mother huff a chuckle he knew all too well was sarcastic. “He’s stupid even in his sacrifice... I didn’t need someone to cov-”

Gihun stepped from the door when he heard approaching footsteps. He couldn’t hear his molther’s final sentence. He walked down the hallway quickly almost heading back to his room, trying to make any sense of what he overheard. But when he passed the corner of the hallway, he glanced back at the door one last time and was surprised when he suddenly saw Sangwoo walking down the hallway towards the barely open door. He expected Sangwoo to just knock and ask about his whereabouts. However to his surprise, Sangwoo stood still, taking his eavesdropping spot and listening himself. Gihun knew it would be hypocritical to criticize Sangwoo’s action when it was him that had opened the door in the first place, but he still felt offended. After all, that was his sister and mother he was overhearing. He’s their family. He’s allowed.

Sangwoo stood there listening and Gihun hated that Sangwoo was bound to know more than him now. Still he wouldn’t move from his spot, preferring to watch Sangwoo eavesdrop. Hoping to catch traces of anything on his face.

Little did he know what Sangwoo was hearing would be a missed opportunity…

“Stop it! You know what mother? He is stupid. He is stupid for loving someone like me with a mother like you. He is stupid because he confessed to a crime he didn’t commit just because he thought I did it. Just because I was so worried about YOU that I panicked and told him I had done it! All to protect you and you don’t even appreciate it!”

“Junhee you’re being too emotional.”

“NO, no you- don’t you even feel slightly bad for him? Not for the murder?! Not even for deceiving him and making him believe that I’m still pregnant?! Not for tricking him and orchestrating a plan to give him Kang Noeul’s baby, the maid’s baby, to raise as his own without ever telling him?!”

Gihun didn’t know what was being said but by the sudden pale look on Sangwoo’s face, he knew he’d just missed out on something major. Sangwoo who always tried to be as calm as a rock looked shaken, stepping back from the door and hurrying back the way he came from. Gihun hurried back towards the door, hoping he would still get to hear anything important.

“Junhee. Enough. Close this chapter. His father will bring him out of this mess anyway and he will only be grateful later when he has that very child you speak of.” Gihun heard faint rustling of someone standing up and knew that he had to leave the hallway right away. When he reached his room, all he could think about is what he could’ve possibly just missed.

It has been two weeks since Myunggi’s confession and Inho still couldn’t answer the mountain of questions in his head. Something about his confession just didn’t make sense. He remembered—despite it being too painful—how Myunggi was the first to bump into him when he got downstairs. Inho’s still remembered his coughs and hoarse voice repeating the panicked words of how he couldn’t save her.

Why would he be so distraught over someone he allegedly put in the fire himself? Unless he too was a master manipulator like Sangwoo and was just setting up the stage by acting panicked and horrified. Inho’s eyebrows twitched at the thought. No, Myunggi was quite polite, kept to himself and whenever he did speak to a staff member he was kind. He found it hard to believe that he would kill his sister. But if he didn’t do it, then why would he take the fall?

Inho had only one answer for that and he was certain he didn’t like it one bit.

Myunggi could be protecting someone.

Inho couldn’t bring himself to think about who it was. It required so much strength to face the truth that kept scratching the back of his mind and he simply didn’t have that strength.

What baffled him the most about this situation was that he had the annoying feeling that it wasn’t Sangwoo behind this after all. Myunggi wouldn’t take the fall for him. They weren’t close to begin with and ever since Myunggi became his second in command, Sangwoo had been borderline hostile towards him. So, no, Myunggi wasn’t protecting him.

Those last few days consisted of him grappling with the fact that it wasn’t Sangwoo that had taken her life after all. A fact he was so sure of that he was willing to bet his whole life on it. Still, even if he hadn’t pulled the final trigger, in his eyes it will always be Sangwoo’s fault.

He had destroyed Saebyeok’s life and Inho wanted to make him pay for it.

But the problem was and always will be Gihun. If he hurts Sangwoo, he’d be hurting Gihun and he would end up completely losing him. That is if he hasn’t already.

Inho walked aimlessly down the same hallway he always found himself in, no matter how many times he told himself he’d avoid it. The one hallway where that one specific suite was. The suite that Inho longed to see the owner of and finally just talk to again. They haven’t spoken since that day at the secret place where Gihun made it clear that he was done with him. Inho didn’t want to push him since then, preferring to just give him as much space as possible. Pretending that he himself was air just so that he wouldn’t bother Gihun. But It was so difficult to not be around Gihun. Especially when he not only felt like he would go insane but also when he felt like Gihun himself needed him but wouldn’t admit it. When he felt the fleeting glances at the back of his head, he knew Gihun wanted to talk to him despite everything. But whenever he’d get the courage and look back, Gihun would pretend he was invisible and that frustrated him to no end. Because Gihun could always just come and talk to him and open that door he’d shut. But he knew for a fact that he himself couldn’t be the one to take that first step.

But then one day turned into two and then three and when the punishment of silence became too much, he found himself just wondering why he was so afraid of taking that first step. Well, he knew that Gihun had set clear boundaries for one. Another nagging thing was that he also knew that deep down a part of him was hurt by Gihun’s words to a point where talking to him was just not possible for the little pride he had left. But as it turns out that pride stood nothing in front of the suffocating silence that was harsher than words had been. Two weeks of nothingness from Gihun made him not only more mad at himself but also just questioning something that he desperately needed an answer for.

Did Gihun even want him here anymore?

He thought about it a lot these days. Wondering if Gihun wants him to stay, wondering if he himself should stay after Myunggi had confessed. After all, Myunggi was in custody and nothing was left for him to do. He’d stayed to see someone pay for it and he did. Even if it wasn’t the person he had wanted to watch suffer, and speaking of that person, he knew he couldn’t hurt Sangwoo. At least not unless he had proof of his true colors. But even that thought he questioned.

Did he want to get revenge?

Did he want more of this crap that made him lose his sister? He didn’t think he could let it go and a part of him still seethed every night, longing to go into Sangwoo’s room and just murder him for the hell of it. But he found that it- that all of it didn’t matter if Gihun didn’t want him there anymore. He needed to know, to hear it from Gihun himself and if Gihun decides that he does not even wish to have him there then so be it.

Then he’d just go, leave and try to cope with his losses. But if Gihun says he should stay then he will finally feel like he can just at least have a sense of direction again and then he’d find out the secret that Sangwoo and Madame Seong wished to bury and he would expose it just for the hell of it.

But he would couldn’t do anything unless Gihun was backing him up and with that thought in mind, he marched upstairs with a golden serving trolley filled with breakfast. Heading to Gihun’s suite in the early morning before he could change his mind. He knocked gently and waited for the faint come in. He opened the door and pushed the trolley inside, closing the door behind him and entering the large space. Luckily for him, Gihun was reading a book and hadn’t noticed him until he’d closed the door.

His head shot up from the book as he probably felt like whoever had come in was too silent. Inho saw the various expressions flickering on his face going from surprise to hurt to anger and then to something that settled and frustrated him the most. Indifference.

“What are you still doing at the hotel? Do you seriously have the nerve to come here?” Gihun’s voice was however not indifferent as his expression. It was barely contained anger that he felt more acutely as Gihun harshly closed the book with a loud thud.

Inho gripped the trolley nervously as Gihun’s first words confirmed his very fear. Still he couldn’t let that be the deciding moment. He’d try for once to argue for his case. “I’m only still here because of you actually.” Gihun’s eyes narrowed with a new shade of hardness that Inho knew he only got because of his own actions. “I know it’s hard to forgive me for that day but-” his voice broke slightly, “please let me stay close. I don’t want anything-”

“You don’t have the right to ask for anything,” Gihun interrupted, his voice slightly softer than his stiff demeanor.

“I know. I also know I caused you pain you might never forgive me for,” he walked slower to Gihun’s chair. “But I swear it was out of my control and I never meant to hurt you. She’s my sister and the decision was simply too difficult.”

A sudden knock disrupted them, followed by the familiar voice of Sangwoo calling out Gihun’s name.

They both looked at each other and Gihun’s eyes were no longer wary and tired but just wide in alarm. Seeing Gihun looking scared made him jump into action instantly. “It’s fine, I’m just a server bringing you breakfast,” he whispered gently and walked back to the trolley before looking at Gihun encouragingly.

Gihun’s wide eyes relaxed slightly before leaning back and calling for Sangwoo to come in. As expected Sangwoo didn’t even glance at him on his way to Gihun. He knew that the fact that Sangwoo considered staff invisible and unworthy of being acknowledged would serve him someday and he had a feeling it wouldn’t be the last time either. He hovered by the trolley pretending to be slowly placing each item on the table and just listened in on the conversation.

Or more like the speech Sangwoo was giving, as Gihun was barely speaking at all. “I brought all the magazines I had ordered with all the latest suit designs and specifically wedding attires.”

“Sangwoo that’s not the time for this at the moment with everything that’s happened.”

“Gihun, I had ordered them before any of this happened. What would you like me to do with them? Burn them?!” Inho paused at the harsh tone that Sangwoo used. His sudden aggression was unnatural for his constant preformance of being the most loving fiancé out there. He glanced at them with barely restrained anger. Sangwoo’s language and tone were just one more reason for Inho to grip the porcelain cup tighter. One more reason to want this man dead.

“No, no. I don’t mean to upset you, I’m sorry.” Gihun’s voice was careful, too gentle. It rubbed Inho the wrong way how Gihun had to not only take his words back but also apologize for them. Something was completely wrong here and something told him that it was his own fault. Maybe it was because of the letter Gihun had mentioned leaving for Sangwoo.

He forced himself to look back at the trolley.

“I’m not upset. I can never be mad at you,” Sangwoo said and Inho’s jaw tightened at the return of the sickly sweet tone. How is Gihun not alarmed by the whiplash?

“I’ll leave for some meeting. Do you want anything from downtown?”

“No.” Came Gihun’s barely there whisper, paired with the forced smile Inho didn’t have to see to know was there.

Sangwoo kissed Gihun on the cheek and Inho nearly dropped a plate of biscuits. He shouldn’t have looked but damnit his instincts had compelled him to watch, to make sure nothing happens as if he could even stop them from kissing. Like he had any agency in this situation.

Sangwoo left the room not bothering to close the door behind him. Perhaps a sign of how Inho, an alpha shouldn’t be behind closed doors with an omega. Of course no one would say anything if it’s just for a one or two minutes but if they stayed for prolonged periods of time then it wouldn’t look good for either party. Regardless, once the sound of his steps subsided, Gihun stood up quickly and walked towards him anxiously while he went to close the door once again.

He walked back to Gihun, standing few steps away from him in the large room. He couldn’t help the relieved breath as he stared at Gihun. Because this situation they found themselves in made him realize something and it answered the bugging question in his mind.

“Thank you,” he said simply.

“What for?” Gihun tried to look harsh and wary once more but was still visibly trying to shake his previous nerves off.

“For turning out to be lying when you said you never loved me.” Inho allowed himself the smallest victorious smile when he saw Gihun freeze in surprise.

“You didn’t mean it. If you had, you would’ve exposed me to him right now. You wouldn’t have cared about what would happen to me then.”

Gihun looked away with a frown, shrugging his shoulder slightly like he was about to act nonchalant and say more things he didn’t mean. “Inho the decision I made that day was stupid. Emotional and impulsive without any logic whatsoever. I was stupid thinking that it could be some kind of a happy ending.” Inho watched him shrug and speak calmly as though he was convinced by his own words.

“But you said to me yourself. This isn’t a fairytale right?” Gihun said with deprecating smile. “Perhaps your decision was even good for me. It made me wake up and brought me back to reality. That’s what’s right after all…because we can’t just leave family behind.”

Inho just stared at him before trying to reach the Gihun he knew was still there.“But what about us?”

“Can’t-” Gihun drew a sharp breath and shook his head. “I- I can’t do this to myself again,” he said in a small voice that broke his heart.

Inho took a deep breath, “I understand.” Inho understood in that moment that it was over. That Gihun wouldn’t be capable of choosing him again. “Can I stay nearby then?”He wanted to say near you but he felt that it was obvious enough.

Gihun shook his head faintly again, looking more and more like a sad child. “You’d be only hurting both of us,” he whispered in that small broken voice that made Inho automatically take two steps closer. Seeing Gihun look so sad, sounding so very small was even more painful than the silence.

“Doesn’t matter, I can handle it. I deserve it.”

Gihun shrugged his shoulders helplessly, “what about me?” He whispered.

Inho glanced at the ground. Gihun got him there. He wouldn’t want to hurt Gihun any more than he already has.

He looked up at him again, his mind made up. “No I don’t want you to be hurt of course.” Gihun parted his lips slightly, eyebrows twitching slightly in surprise at his sincerity. “Gihun,” he took another big breath and forced himself to say his own fear out loud.

“If my presence here is hurting you, I will leave and you will never have to see me again.” He gazed at Gihun with finality. “Should I leave, Gihun?” There it was, the question that led him here.

Inho held his breath

Gihun looked at the floor, his lips formed in a sad pout.

Then..

He started faintly shaking his head slowly, still not looking him in the eyes. Like he was admitting defeat, showing a weakness. Inho knew it must be difficult for the omega to admit that he still needed him after everything. Gihun kept shaking his head more insistently, his big eyes darting upwards at him like a guilty kid before finally stilling and just looking at him sadly, almost in a defeated type of way.

Inho could finally breathe again but he still felt like choking.

He smiled sadly at Gihun before selfishly allowing himself to gently touch his cheek and give him a brief kiss on his forehead. He knew he was selfish for craving his touch, his scent but he couldn’t help it. He just needed that final touch. One last time before withdrawing and respecting Gihun’s decision to end everything.

He took a step back, seeing Gihun’s eyes open again. Inho knew he’d been lost in the brief touch as well. Inho gave him one last sad smile and a quick stroke on the cheek before leaving the suite, knowing that neither of them will be happy from this point forward.

Two more weeks passed where unusual things happened and that’s not saying much because unusual things just kept happening at the Grand ever since he’d come back. Gihun watched a paranoid Junhee pacing around the room aimlessly before heading back to the telephone. “I’ll try to reach her again,” she muttered distractedly as she began dialing the hospital.

Gihun frowned at her in concern and complete bewilderment. “Junhee I told you she didn’t answer when I tried. You know mom must be on her way back from the hospital. Just go dress please. Your mother in law must be waiting downstairs with Myunggi’s lawyer…Why do you want mom to be there so much? Why are you so worried about her visit?”

Junhee shook her head and continued to pace as though she hadn’t heard him. It was frustrating. “Frankly I don’t understand why mom is so involved with Kang Noeul’s care at the hospital. I mean she arranged a room for her at the hospital, paying for all costs and has been visiting her there non stop the last few days and I even heard you asking about her health... Since when does either of you care about an employee’s health so much?! I was always the ridiculous one for so much as telling them hello.”

He couldn’t help the resentful tone but it was true. He used to get punished for being too nice to any employee and as he grew up he became more defiant in his resolve to always be kind no matter what they said. So when his mother who was always the one to punish him is suddenly overtly kind towards Kang Noeul after she started screaming in pain a week ago, of course he was bewildered.

Gihun hadn’t known much about Kang Noeul. After her incident however, he had discovered the unusual fact that she and Junho had gotten married in secret and that she was even already pregnant. Naturally the status of her pregnancy was a hushed situation only his family was aware of. The rest of the staff just knew that Junho and Neoul were married and that she got sick.

Gihun was surprised to say the least and he would’ve even been scolding Junho for not letting him know if it weren’t for the fact that her health had declined that day. Junho said she must’ve had eaten something bad that somehow poisoned her and caused her the worst type of pain imaginable, nearly terminating the pregnancy. A food poisoning that thankfully didn’t harm her baby. Still, all of this didn’t explain why his mother and his sister cared this much. He was glad they were finally showing others some kindness but nowadays he simply couldn’t just regard a fact as a simple fact. After everything that had happened it simply became second nature to doubt. Not to mention that he had not forgotten the conversation he had overheard. But all of it was suddenly on hold when Myunggi’s lawyer called and said that there might be good news soon. So, in short, the last few days have been strange and Gihun—as always— couldn’t speak to a single soul about it. The only person he used to discuss everything with- well, they no longer speak anymore. They hadn’t spoken since the day where they quietly decided to forget everything. To consider the last months as a simple summer fling. It fit. It worked even better as the winter was approaching.

His thoughts were interrupted when his mother suddenly entered the room, sighing as she sat down next to him. Junhee immediately went to stand in front of her. “The lawyer is here,” she said, looking urgently at their mother.

“So what are you waiting for? Go, they must be waiting,” their mother lazily removed her silk shawl from around her neck. Junhee’s expression hardened slightly. “Aren’t you coming with me?”

Their mother looked as indifferent as ever as she said no. “Go before your mother in law starts yelling downstairs.”

Junhee looked at their mother a certain way that left him uneasy and in that moment he wished he could tell Inho about it.

Inho noticed how odd everything was becoming here lately and as always, it started and ended with Sangwoo. Inho’s resolve to respect Gihun’s decision wasn’t enough to stop him from keeping an eye on the omega. Strangely enough, by keeping watch over Gihun from afar he noticed something new and odd. There was a man—a beta by the looks of it—who was somehow always around Gihun. When he asked Junho who he was, Junho had started to complain about his mere existence. Saying: “how come they have the budget to hire a new chauffeur and then turn around and fire staff members, saying it’s necessary because of the lack of guests?” Junho had a good point. Why suddenly hire this man even though they’re suffering losses? And why was he almost always where Gihun was?

So instead of watching Gihun—which evidently wasn’t doing him any good—he started watching this man instead. That’s when he noticed that he seems to report to Sangwoo’s office everyday. Like clockwork. Inho realized then that this man was Sangwoo’s agent and he knew that this guy must’ve been planted here to spy on whoever he was driving and would always head to report what he overheard. By now, Sangwoo’s suspicious actions didn’t surprise him anymore. But he only wondered why Sangwoo thought he needed a spy.

Another odd thing that happened here was that Kang Noeul’s food poisoning happened right after he was hired. It had been the talk of last week among the staff and that’s why no one had really noticed this man slipping among them. He had wanted to pay more attention to this guy but Junho’s extreme worry over Noeul’s health had kept him occupied. They went to the hospital whenever they could, well, he’d go with Junho but always stay outside. Cause the thing was that despite Junho’s new marriage, he still didn’t like Kang Noeul. He found himself agreeing with Junho’s mother Ms. Jang; he simply didn’t have a good feeling about her and never had, especially since she went from being indifferent and cruel towards Junho to being nice and.. well compliant with his desire to get married.

Still, he wanted to be there for Junho and after every visit they would go to drink at Kims and talk about how odd it was that the great Madame Seong herself had cared about Noeul’s health. He just knew something wasn’t right about her sudden interest—hell even Junho who was the most oblivious man on earth thought it’s odd—but he couldn’t determine for now whether it was worth his interest. He’ll note it down in his mind for the time being and circle back to it if anything new happens.

Whenever he wasn’t thinking about conspiracies, secrets and lies, he’d try to think of anything random to do to keep him busy. He didn’t want to be alone with his feelings these days because they all revolved around how much he was missing Gihun. The distance between them had never been further lately and he felt it whenever he needed a moment of quiet and would realize that he no longer had the right to go to the secret place. He’d also feel it whenever he got wind of Gihun’s wedding preparation. The thought of Gihun’s wedding approaching pained him in a way he never thought was possible for him to feel again. It was the kind of pain that he’d only felt when he had lost Saebyeok. He tried to distract himself by watching that chauffeur, by working more hours, he even went so far as to give Kim Youngmi—who was finally turning back to normal—some private reading lessons in their free time. She had simply been ecstatic as the prospect of learning to read. Junho kept joking that she was merely excited because he was the one giving her the lessons. He ignored him and carried on.

“Inho,” Junho quietly approached him in the main hall and he instantly knew something was wrong. Junho always tried to keep calling him Youngil in public and would only slip when he was mad or anxious or distracted. Well, he certainly didn’t look mad or distracted. “Inho, stay calm alright? Please,” he said gently as he came to stand next to him, gripping his arm firmly as though preparing to hold him back if need be.

Inho looked at the hand gripping him with a frown. “What’s wrong?”

“Promise not to do anything reckless okay?” Junho looked almost desperate.

“Junho,” he whispered warningly.

“Myunggi has been released.”

Silence.

How? Why? His mind just stopped working.

He looked at the entrance of the hotel just in time to see Myunggi walking back with his wife Junhee, holding her gently with a tired smile on his face. How was this possible?

“He’d only been arrested a month ago. How?”

Junho looked at him worryingly and tightened his grip. “I don’t know but please just come with me and we’ll go to the precinct now. Lets go, I already talked to Mr Park and he wants you to go too,” he said as he started pulling him back downstairs. Inho let himself get pulled, let himself be coaxed gently like he was a ticking time bomb.

Frankly if he didn’t get an explanation from the detective, he will be.

He decided to go to the precinct alone, not wanting to be with anyone. He decided to just put all his feelings aside until he heard what detective Jungbae had to say. If he let his emotions get to him now, then he will just march there and start yelling. That wasn’t him, no. He knocked at the office door and opened it, stepping into the office quickly and not bothering to sit down.

“Why?” He didn’t need to say anything. He couldn’t say anything properly until he got the answer.

The detective didn’t look surprised to see him like this. “They made an appeal and it worked.”

Was it as simple as that?

“He admitted to killing her and throwing her in a fire. How is a month enough for that?” He said through gritted teeth, his insides already beginning to twist in anger.

“Unfortunately Inho…your sister made it far too difficult to get justice for her. She herself faces crimes of her own. She broke into the hotel, stole a valuable item and on top of that started a fire with the intent to harm others. These are three crimes already. So persuading a judge to be lenient on the son of a powerful man who just simply wanted to protect everyone wasn’t that difficult,” he said with a long sigh, like he was the tired one in the room.

“I’m sorry…If you were anyone else Inho, I would’ve told you to pack up and leave this place. If you were anyone else I would automatically make you sign a restraining order. But I know you’re smart and rational. So don’t make me arrest you for anything stupid yes?” Jungbae was looking at him with both sympathy and warning in his eyes. Like he understood his anger but was still doing his duty as a police officer.

Inho didn’t say a word. He simply gave a curt nod and left.

When he reached somewhere quiet, he finally allowed himself to think. To accept the crisis he was in. To see that all he had done wasn’t enough and never would be.

He had been too kind. He had been too gentle and easy on everyone. Had let himself be a passive watcher instead of a player. Telling himself that he wanted to be on the right side of things. Didn’t want to get caught in the ugly mess his sister was in. In all his time here, he had barely strayed from that path and had acted like he was the righteous one in front of Saebyeok.

Well where was she now?

That’s what he kept telling himself after her death. That her straying from the right path and marching towards revenge had gotten her dead.

But what had righteousness gotten him?

Got him to watch her die, got him helpless to save her or even avenge her and finally got him to watch the law fail her. There was nothing else righteousness could offer him.

No case, no suspect, no right, no justice. Nothing.

Inho realized that he was struggling to breathe when he saw his chest expanding wildly. He needed to yell, needed to go somewhere and explode before he could start to plan.

Plan how to finally find out what had gotten her dead. Plan how to use it against them and finally, plan her revenge.

The next day, he was serving the two guests in the veranda. The good thing about deciding to expose the Seongs was that currently, the Grand Hotel was still suffering. The damage Saebyeok had done was still there one month later. The lack of guests was more evident than ever and a sick twisted part of him was proud of his sister for making them suffer in any way. Especially financially. It was ridiculous to know that her final act had a longer effect than justice did.

As he served them, he went over his first step in his mind. He will have to find the right moment to step into Sangwoo’s suite and search for that letter. The elusive letter was probably not with his sister when she was murdered. He knew her. He knew how smart she is and she wouldn’t simply carry it around when she was setting up the fire. So it was only a question of who could have it and if it had been destroyed already. Before he could think of anything else however, Gihun stepped into the veranda, walking precisely towards his direction. He frowned and looked away.

He didn’t- no he couldn’t think of Gihun. Not anymore. Not when he had made up his mind to expose his family.

He hoped that Gihun was simply walking somewhere else or that he simply wanted to talk to the guest he was serving but no. Gihun stood a few inches away from the table, waiting for him to finish. He sighed in annoyance, and yes he was annoyed because Gihun seems to know exactly when Inho is up to something he won’t like. He is always there to disrupt his plans and up to this moment, Inho had allowed him.

Not anymore.

If he goes through with this, then he will dedicate everything to it. He won’t hold back for anyone. Not even his heart.

He grabbed the tray and walked past Gihun without looking at him.

“Youngil.” Inho clenched his eyes in frustration. He could feel Gihun’s eyes on the back of his head and could hear his slight surprise at being ignored.

Inho turned around and walked only one step forward, keeping his eyes strictly on the ground. “Yes sir?”

He didn’t have to look upwards to know that Gihun was probably frowning at the title. It was what he had wanted after all, right?

He could see Gihun’s feet inching closer. Still he refused to look up. “Bring my favorite snack to my room.”

Inho had to look up at the odd command. Sure enough, Gihun had been waiting for him to do so as he tilted his head slightly towards the stairs at the back of the veranda.

Inho had half a mind to refuse. He didn’t want to go to the secret place. How could he when the last time he’d been there, Gihun himself had clearly set boundaries that had hurt? How could he go when the last he’d been there, he was still trying hard to be good. To not do anything out of line. When he had been holding back for a love that was no longer allowed to be there.

It was still there, a voice deep down whispered. But he couldn’t acknowledge it. If he does, then he will never get the justice he needs.

When Gihun walked away he simply patted his pocket and found the cigarettes. That was his favorite stress snack after all. Ten minutes later he stood in front of the bench where Gihun had treated him coldly. He still remembered deserving it of course but still, after the law itself had failed him, he was simply overtaken by the bitter part in him. The dark bitter part that said that no one had been fair. Not even Gihun.

Gihun came to stand in front of him, looking wary as he took the cigarette. Even his wariness put him on edge. It was the omega that had wanted to see him in the first place. He was actually fine with not seeing Gihun for the very first time since arriving at the Grand and now here he was and Gihun had the nerve to act wary.

“How are you?” Gihun broke the silence after taking a smoke. Inho didn’t look at him.

“Fine.”

“Are you sure?” He felt Gihun’s eyes on him.

“Yes.”

“Poppycock.”

Inho paused and finally looked at Gihun, completely confused.“What?”

Gihun didn’t quite smile but his eyes took a certain humorous angle. “My dad used to say that when I talked nonsense.”

“Oh.” He couldn’t say anything else. He didn’t know where this was going or what it would do to his plan.

“I’m worried,” Gihun continued and then waited for him to reply. To say anything. He pondered what he could even say to that. What was he worried about? Was Gihun worried about his well-being or Myunggi’s?

“I wont hurt him,” he settled on that and decided that technically he wasn’t lying. It’s not his intention to harm Myunggi. His intention is to harm Sangwoo and whoever he is working with. To expose whoever that letter had bothered so much that they had decided to kill his sister for it.

Gihun simply stared at him.

Inho found it hard to be anything but honest to Gihun. Even now. Gihun was his light, the force that makes him want to stay away from the darkness. But Myunggi walking free and the case closing was enough for him to not bear to look at that light. He stared around the secret place as he smoked. Should he try one last time to cling to the light?

He decided to stretch out his hand as though he was a drowning man. Decided to call out to Gihun to save him.

He’ll try it only this one time. Just for the sake of being in the secret place that had once been theirs.

“Gihun can we leave this place? Can we really leave it behind this time?” He gathered the strength to look at Gihun and saw the answer on his face before he could say anything.

“I can’t do this again. Do you think it’s easy?” Gihun’s voice was colder, stiffer as he crossed his arms defensively.

“Do you think it’s easy for me either? I’m telling you that I’m willing to leave Saebyeok behind. Leave her memory behind and wake up everyday knowing that I let her down.”

“See?! Neither you or I have the strength to do this! We can’t do this again…You’re right..we can’t leave family behind. It’s over.” Gihun dropped his arms again and simply looked away.

Inho looked at him for a few seconds longer, nodded to himself and then stomped his cigarette out. He left the secret place without saying anything more to Gihun, but he felt his gaze on him with every step he took.

Still,he didn’t dare to look back.

There was simply so much to say and yet neither one of them had the courage to do so.

It’s over.

Gihun had decided his path for him now. He will focus on finding out the biggest secret of the Grand and nothing will be able to stop him this time.

When he was starting his shift the next morning, he heard Ms. Jang talking about the wedding and how Gihun and Sangwoo had decided to bring the wedding date forward. She even said that Gihun would leave with his mother today to go to another town and shop for wedding attires there. He would be gone for a week or two, depending on how long the shopping takes. Inho staggered just a second as he heard all of it. The way the news was uttered by Jang made it seem like it was new and sudden. Almost as though Gihun had been provoked by him leaving him in the secret place and had foolishly went to Sangwoo and agreed to hasten the wedding preparation along. In a way, they had both made a choice yesterday.

Choices that he didn’t know would end well for either of them.

Inho watched Gihun go. He simply had to see him before he left. He couldn’t help but watch him as he spoke to Sangwoo in front of the car. A part of him was yelling that he should stop all of this, protesting that he should be getting in that car with Gihun and simply go somewhere new where they can never be found again.

But when Gihun smiled at Sangwoo and held his hand, he looked away, choosing to walk on. Gihun had made his choice.

So has he.

Gihun leaving turned out to be beneficial in a way. Because with Gihun out of the way, he could focus. He wouldn’t hesitate. He spent the next days mapping out Sangwoo’s schedule and movement. When he would wake up, eat, work, meet with that shady man of his and finally when he would fall asleep. He waited those few days before finding the right time to search his room. Sangwoo was currently in a meeting downstairs in his office and the corridor was empty.

He searched the entire suite, looking for evidence. For anything that would help tie him to Saebyeok. Because what he has also remembered those last few days was his earlier suspicion that Myunggi was perhaps only a fall guy. Perhaps Sangwoo is the guilty one after all. It was a shot in the dark to look for anything incriminating, he knew that. Frankly because he had to admit that Sangwoo was much smarter than that. But still, searching for the letter was enough reason to be in the suite.

However right when he was done searching with no avail, he heard a door open. Luckily for him, the suite is huge with multiple rooms and so space to hide was not an issue. He was standing in the closet room and had subtly closed the light as he heard the door. Another lucky thing was that he knew not to panic because Sangwoo was bound to leave again soon to head to dinner. He was dining with an important guest in the hopes of getting the Grand Hotel back on track. It’s supposed to take place in about five minutes so Sangwo had no time to even walk around the suite.

What made him pause however was when he suddenly heard the door open again. He wondered if Sangwoo had already left again but then he finally heard someone speak.

“What are you doing here?” Sangwoo’s voice was cold and annoyed. So he couldn’t be speaking to anyone important.

“I just wanted to let you know that I’m completely fine. Just so you wouldn’t be worried about me at your wedding.”

Inho froze

He knew this voice. Begrudgingly so.

It was Kang Noeul.

He automatically stepped closer to be able to hear them better.

“I’m back at the hotel as you can see. I made it just fine out of that hospital..I’m even stronger than before and much more cautious.” Inho could hear the venomous smile in her tone.

“So don’t try to poison me again.” Inho frowned harder than before.

Poison?

Why did Sangwoo poison Noeul?

“Again? I never poisoned you in the first place,” Sangwoo sounded as indifferent than ever but even Inho who couldn’t see his face knew it was bullshit. Poppycock like Gihun would call it.

“Oh? So I was wrong then? It’s not like you didn’t find out that Madame Seong was interested in my pregnancy and immediately tried to kill me right after.”

Inho was very confused at this point. He knew Madame Seong was too involved in Noeul’s pregnancy and at least he knew for certain now that there was a cause behind it. Another secret to add to the list. But why would Sangwoo want to poison her for it?

“So tell you underlings to not try to harm me. Cause I could destroy you whenever I want…I’m not Saebyeok.”

Inho clenched his fist tightly.

He heard what was probably a loud kiss on the cheek and his fist clenched further as more and more started to make sense. He heard her leave the room and waited until Sangwoo followed suit.

Inho went downstairs and walked until he reached the empty secret place. It looked darker and colder than usual now that Gihun wasn’t there. It felt lonelier than ever despite it always having been the place he felt the most comforted in.

She said she wasn’t Saebyeok.

She kissed him on the cheek.

He tried to poison her.

She said she could destroy him.

Everything led to a certain conclusion. Noeul was another one of Sangwoo’s conquests at the hotel. He must’ve been with her as well. Her pregnancy… it could be his. No he had a horrible feeling it was his. Why else would he poison her? Now the only two things he still couldn’t find an answer for is why Madame Seong is interested Noeul’s pregnancy. Surely if she knew it’s Sangwoo’s then she wouldn’t be that kind to her right? The other thing he couldn’t decipher was how she could destroy Sangwoo. Did she mean destroy him with the secret of having his child. Of course it was enough to call off the wedding.

Gihun

If it’s really his child then he has to tell Gihun before the wedding.

No. Gihun would deny everything. Hell he wasn’t even sure himself. He was just theorizing and he knew by now that Gihun wouldn’t leave Sangwoo for mere theories.

Gihun will think he’s jealous and paranoid because the wedding was close. It broke his heart to know that at this point Gihun wouldn’t even believe him. Wouldn’t even give him the benefit of the doubt like he used to.

What about Junho? Junho knows the child isn’t his but does he know whose it could be? Did she perhaps tell him?

Inho stayed at the secret place until dark. Until he couldn’t think anymore. He decided to simply keep all the cards close to his chest for the time being and to keep an eye on someone he hadn’t considered before. Kang Noeul.

Days passed and before he knew it, he was back at the Grand. It has been a week since he’d left. A week where apparently everyone had done their absolute best to prepare the hotel to be the best venue for a wedding.

His wedding.

Gihun stepped out of the car with Sangwoo right behind him. He hadn’t missed this place. It shocked him to feel that way about the place that he had always called home. Frankly the only place he’d missed here was a certain place by the water where the sun shined the most.

But he wouldn’t go there. Not when his wedding was tomorrow. The thought made him shudder.

He realized quickly that he can’t escape today. He cannot be alone for a single second. Sangwoo had already let him know that all of his stuff had been brought to their new suite. A completely new one, freshly designed for the soon to be newly wed. Tonight he would sleep in a guest room. Apparently the only one left unbooked as all of their wedding guests occupied the hotel. He sounded so proud as though their wedding would single-handedly save and restore the Grand’s reputation. Whenever Sangwoo wasn’t there to talk about how much he’d missed him, his mother was there to talk about the wedding.

The inevitable doom.

They talked about his wedding like it was a business transaction and not a union of two people. Both Sangwoo and his mother were talking about how to set it up perfectly so that their guests could forget about the fire. The grand wedding was more about the Grand than the wedding itself and it disgusted him. They’re using him as a means to show the world that the Grand was still doing fine. That they still got it and it got to him that even in the arguably most important of day of his life, he was still treated like a passive puppet. An object to move around in any way in order to help their own prestige.

He had regretted it.

He had regretted hurrying everything up. It was so easy to succumb to the provocation of Inho suggesting they leave again and then simply walking away when the answer was no. He knows now that he had been irrational but damn that man, he always made him foolish. And his foolery led him to this wedding tomorrow.

He knew he wouldn’t and couldn’t run away from it. He stood by his promise to accept Sangwoo’s punishment after that night when he’d broken down.

He greeted everyone nervously and snapped at his mother when she was being unkind to Ms. Jang Geumja in front of him. It irritated him to no end when his mother treated her badly even though they both knew that she was carrying the whole hotel on her back. It didn’t happen often that his mother would be snappy with her. It seems to only happen when his mother sees his close bond to Geumja. He always ignored it, thinking his mother was simply jealous when Geumja acted like his second mom. She was his second mom, which is why he wouldn’t let anyone disrespect her. Even if it’s his own mother.

After his mother told him sorry and by that he meant a smooth “pardon dear,” he settled down and decided to stay in Junhee’s room until he calmed down. When their mother left him and Junhee alone in the room, he asked her how she and Myunggi were doing. Naturally, her answers were short as usual. It reminded him of the feeling that something wasn’t right with his sister.

When he finally sat down at dinner, he couldn’t help but glance around the room. Scanning the faces all around him.

He wasn’t there.

Had he left? Had Inho left the hotel for good?

He wouldn’t blame him if he did. At the end of the day, he’d clearly made his choice and left nothing left for Inho to do. His heart clenched at the thought of Inho leaving. Selfishly, he couldn’t imagine carrying on his life in any way without him being there. Even if they can’t be together. The possibility of Inho’s permanent absence made him walk around the hotel longer that evening. Look in the veranda, garden, corridors, balconies. No sign of him. He wandered close to the stairs that led to the kitchens and was about to go there under the pretense of wanting food for the stray cats when he suddenly heard Mr. Park talking to a server. He hurried back so he wouldn’t be seen but he could swear that Mr. Park had glanced over in his direction for a second before continuing to talk a tick louder than before.

“Ah and get Youngil to work on the lamps downstairs.”

He was still here.

Inho was still here.

His heart clenched and warmed at the same time and that didn’t let him sleep that night.

“Gihun it’s time! Are you ready?” His mother entered his suite, looking at him approvingly in his white suit. He quickly wiped away at his eyes and smiled at her.

“I- I am.”

Taking her hand, they walked out to the corridor, now full of people ready to walk them downstairs. Guests that he hadn’t seen in a long time. Friends from abroad that probably didn’t even know anything about the person he’d become by now.

He felt even more alone.

Junhee smiled brightly at him as she handed him the flower bouquet. Sangwoo had ordered a specific red carnations bouquet, reminding him of his formal favorite flowers of the past.

How was he to know that he loved daisies now?

His mother had tsked at the flower choice, stating it was for funerals but when she said that Gihun felt that maybe it did fit after all. He walked towards the main stairs, decorated with red carnations and white silk ribbons. Sangwoo was waiting in a fancy black suit accented by the small red carnation on it.

Gihun smiled at Sangwoo as he took his hand. They walked down the stairs together, seeing the entire main hall filled with people staring up at them with their champagne glasses raised. Gihun kept swallowing the whole time, feeling close hiccuping an odd sort of sob. The more he swallowed however, the more the space in his chest became tighter.

He was marrying Sangwoo

He was marrying someone

He wasn’t going to be with-

He was going to be married

They’re all smiling at them

He can’t breathe

He smiled harder like it would save him and watched as everyone dropped their glasses so they could clap and cheer. They walked straight forward towards the white and red alter. Made specifically at the center of the main hall. So everyone could see them.

Everyone was watching him.

He had to smile bigger.

When the crowd grew silent and the speech began, he found it harder to maintain the tears slipping down his face. The stream grew on his check when he realized that people thought he was emotionally happy and was crying out of joy.

“Do you take Cho Sangwoo as your lawfully wedded husband?”

No

No

No

“Yes. I do.”

His instincts stilled. Stopped the fighting and watched the inevitable happen.

“I declare you as legally wedded husbands!”

Cheers erupted all around the hotel and all he did was wipe away tears and smile.

He’d managed to stop the urge to sob as servers started bringing them the golden trays with wedding rings.

Gihun was smiling all around the room when he looked back and was stunned.

Inho

Inho was standing right in front of them.

With the golden tray that carried his ring.

Inho was looking blankly at him and only when Inho glanced down at the tray did he realize that he had frozen in place, smile faltering at the sight of him.

The seconds where they had stared at each other, one blank and the other smiling so hard it hurt were enough for him to feel the sob come back up and to erupt out of him in a choked way that no one noticed among the loud cheering and music. He turned away from Inho, turning his body towards Sangwoo.

He can’t look

He can’t do it

He won’t be able to stop the sobbing if he looked again.

He felt more than saw Sangwooo taking his hand and placing his golden ring on it.

He started crying again as he looked at it and glanced back up at Inho.

Inho smiled at him and stepped back.

Defeated

Resigned

Final

Gihun choked again, hearing the whimper low in his throat before ducking his head in an effort to stop it and smiled wider and wider.

When Sangwoo led him to the dance floor, he saw Inho walk out to the veranda and he instantly knew where he was going.

And as he watched him walk away, the music played.

Chapter Text

The Grand Hotel’s work was tedious and tiresome. It was something he hadn’t dwelled on since starting here, mainly because he had always been in survival mode. He had just wanted to get by so that he wouldn’t get fired, all in the hopes of finding his sister. After her- he threw himself into the work, waiting for the detective to bring him and his sister justice and hoping that it would keep him occupied enough to not think or even feel. When justice brought him nowhere though… he’d stopped drowning himself in work, choosing plans of revenge over survival. Frankly because revenge had become survival for him. His mind even refuses to call it revenge when he simply wants to expose whatever skeleton they’re dying to keep buried and that, had to be justice and not revenge. So anyway, it became as such; he’d work but would leave his thoughts with the list of names he’d marked. He’d remembered overhearing Noeul and Sangwoo and that must be a next step in the nameless quest he’s indulging in. He had settled on everything being a fair price, telling himself that exposing the letter’s secret was more important than whatever price it would cost. Even if it’s his life.

What was his life after Saebyeok anyway?

But what he hadn’t counted on was the wedding.

Gihun

No.

Mr. Seong. That’s his name, he kept echoing to himself ever since that night. That other name that finds itself etched deep within his mind was no longer a real person. The Gihun he knew and fell in love with was just gone, a mere illusion in a wonderful place that was untouched by humanity.

That illusion was shattered the moment he went through with the wedding.

The moment Gihun had said yes was the moment a piece of him had died and that piece was non other than the figment of Gihun’s love that had overtaken his heart. It was like a string that connected them, a fresh delicate line that he himself had bruised with his decision to stay till it was too fragile. Still it had tenderly sustained him with comfort and the will to live and carry on.

That was until Gihun severed it. And so what he’d given away in the secret place without his knowledge was now lost.

He sees it all whenever he closes his eyes or whenever he finds himself not busy enough. The flowers, the sparkling champagne, the glimmering flicker of candles and perfected delights. All the glamorous fake things he’d helped prepare himself with his own hands. It sickened him to the core. He still hears the clapping and cheering, still sees him choking on his own smile, hoping that it wont kill him. He still feels the moment their eyes met right at the altar.

The sheer second when they had drowned the noise and just stared at each other, each with their own hurt on their sleeve.

He’d stared at him, resigned. Asking: are you really doing this? And Gihun only looked back defeated, his smile telling him: yes I am.

He couldn’t stay and watch it after. He’d escaped- no had tried to escape and find refuge in the only place he knew any remnants of peace in. But even that had done nothing to help or drown out the noise of celebration, certainly didn’t stop him from seeing the fireworks lighting up the sky and covering all of the stars with vibrant hoax. All he could do was sit by the water, letting the illusion of colors light his face and as he mourned what he had lost that night.

The fact that he had been the one to give Gihun the rings had been enough of masochistic pain for a lifetime. He had been the one to ask for the impossible mission. Mr. Park had tried to argue that it wasn’t a good idea for either of them but he had said that he had to do it. He said to Park that it was the only way he could have closure. Spilled lies on the ground saying that he would be giving Gihun the ring and would be releasing himself of the burden of having undesired feelings by doing so. He’d seen the lie reflected in Mr. Park’s suspicion but in the end he’d relented. Almost as if he knew that it was a desperate attempt to see, to hope that Gihun would finally stop if he just saw him. He hoped that Gihun wouldn’t cut that last tie, that he would wake up and realize the consequences of his actions. He’d be lying if he said that he only cared about the consequences because of Gihun’s own potential unhappiness, after all he was still a selfish man. However when it came down to it, he did truly care so much about Gihun’s future hurt of being tied to a person who doesn’t have his heart.

But Gihun took away his right to care or even think of him and he decided in the cold of that night to honor that decision. He’d only see him for what he chose to be seen as: Mr. Seong, Mr. Cho’s husband and an owner of the hotel he was merely a worker in. He had to see him that way because if he sees Sangwoo’s husband as Gihun—his Gihun— he’d collapse.

Mr. Seong and his husband had left for a lavish honeymoon right after the wedding. He hadn’t been there to watch them leave. Hadn’t even spent the wedding night at the Grand, not bearing to be in the same vicinity. He’d spent the whole night at the secret place, ignoring the shivering and stiff muscles. It was nothing compared to the torture of being in the same place of the newly weds.

When he had returned they had already left.

He found himself breathing a sigh of relief.

Time didn’t fly but it wasn’t stuck either. He’d wake up, listen to Junho complain about still being his roommate despite having a pregnant wife who needed him just because his mother refused to give them a room out of spite. He’d comfort him and then he’d start his shift until he had a break where he could teach Youngmi the alphabet and when all was done and he was finally free of the burden of the day, he would convince Junho to accompany him to Kim’s pub so he could numb his brain and not think of everything. He’d kept an eye on Noeul and found nothing interesting in her behavior, watched Sangwoo’s spy keeping his head down and going through with his daily missions in silence. Nothing was odd and that was the oddity itself.

Sometimes he got weak. Against his better judgment, found his feet dragging him to a certain place. Sometimes he would turn around and leave before he could really see it and sometimes—just when the sour drink wasn’t enough—he’d collapse by the river on the lowest floor, half wishing he’d fall and drown.

But he couldn’t do it to Saebyeok. At least not before he could find the letter and reveal the truth. When he did that, when he made them miserable…maybe then he’d go to the secret place one last time and stay in it forever.

Whenever someone mentioned Mr Seong he’d walk away or he’d notice his grip tightening on whatever poor object he was holding. When telegraphs of their happiness in Paris arrived at the Grand, he’d spent the whole night drinking and adding to the endless overfilled well of sadness within him. However, after two weeks of the happy news of them and the sheer excitement of the staff who were all too happy for Mr. Seong, the well had transformed into a bitter raging fire of anger.

Betrayal.

Gihun had betrayed them that night just like he himself had at the train station.

Were they even now?

No, screamed a loud bitter voice. He’d betrayed them but he had never signed their death warrant. Gihun had.

No, Mr. Seong.

The anger was becoming unbearable and unacceptable when he had snapped at Youngmi for talking about the apparently happy couple. He’d apologized for his behavior later and spent the night drinking even more.

When it had been three weeks since their departure, Inho couldn’t decide if he should take the high road after all. The wedding had not only numbed him, but had also tied him with invisible bounds that made him unable to think of the plans he had wanted to focus on. He found himself often thinking whether it wouldn’t be better to go before their return so he would be spared of the torment of seeing Gihun miserable with Sangwoo. Or worse.

See him Happy.

It’s Mr. Seong now.

He shook his head faintly and walked down the familiar corridor heading to his room. The shift was done and another restless day was over. He was in no mood to drink tonight and would let Junho know that he would stay in tonight.

Just when he thought of him, Junho came from the other side of the corridor. Probably having just been in their room.

“Ah hyung, good that I found you. Listen I gotta switch out the lamps in the main hall. Trust me I tried to get out of it but Mr. Park threatened to kill me if I didn’t do it tonight,” he spoke quickly as he approached him, gesturing dramatically with his hands as he always did whenever he was too absorbed in his talk.

He tried to interrupt but there was no such thing as interrupting Junho when he was vomiting out words at lightning speed. He shook his head fondly.

“Well he actually threatened to tell mom and frankly I consider that worse than dying.” Inspite of him—of everything— Inho felt the stiff muscles on his face twitch in what must have been a smile. Only Junho was capable of causing that slip up to happen.“Anyway, wait for me okay? I’ll switch the lightbulbs quickly and then I’ll come change and we can go to Kim’s together alright? Don’t go before me this time. Don’t want to find you broody AND drunk again.”

“Junho,” he tried again.

“I mean, people are supposed to loosen up after drinking. How do you get even more stuck up and more brooding?”

“Junho I’m not going tonight,” he said louder. That finally got him to stop.

Junho immediately put on his signature sad puppy face that never failed to make him quietly huff an amused chuckle under his breath. “What- why? Hyung come on! I’m happy tonight,” he almost whined pathetically and Inho was suddenly reminded of once having been an older brother.

“Well aren’t you in a good mood..what, was your wife nice to you today?” He couldn’t stop the slight hardened sarcastic edge to his words. After everything he’d heard between Noeul and Sangwoo, he simply could never be convinced of liking her.

Junho frowned in slight annoyance and Inho thought for a second and that it had been enough to discourage him of drinking tonight. Junho felt Inho’s icy feeling towards Noeul and had let it slide as long as no harsh words were uttered directly. But to his surprise Junho only sighed in annoyance before half smiling again. “Inho come on. I go with you whenever you want to. Even if it’s a bad look for a newly married man to be drinking that often. Doesn’t look particularly good but I don’t care because I don’t want you to go drinking alone. So let’s do it and be happy for once.” His voice was more serious than before and Inho felt bad for already dimming his joy.

“What if I said I’m tired and that I had a long day today?” He tried one last time.

Once again Junho reacted differently from what he had expected. Junho’s face lit up with something like a sudden realization that apparently brought him instant amusement.

He walked slightly closer with a wicked smile on his face. “Aha! Could it be that your lengthy lesson with Youngmi today is the reason behind the sudden change of heart?” 

Inho would have snorted at this if it weren’t for the fact that he knew that Junho actually thought he was right and that he had cracked the code.

Unfortunately he wasn’t onto anything. Inho had only reached a new stage of aching where he couldn’t even drink. Sleeping was simply better than staying awake and having thoughts. He’d just have to battle his nightmares and he could deal with it every now and then.

He sighed and tilted his tiredly. “Junho there’s no such thing. I already told you-”

“Yeah yeah, she’s too young and that you practically see her as a little-” Junho stopped before saying the word. But they both knew what he had wanted to say.

Just a simple word that millions of siblings used. But Junho felt like it would hurt him worse than any insult would. He appreciated Junho’s thoughtfulness at this moment. Even if it was excessive and unnecessary.

“Anyway. I don’t buy it. Hyung your ‘lessons’ are getting longer with each day, isn’t that funny?” His stupid smile returned and he even winked as though Inho was taking the girl and doing wicked things. Still he didn’t have it in him to be mad at Junho or argue with him.

He half smiled at Junho. “You know what would be funny? Seeing Ms. Jang tear you a new one in front of the entire staff because you couldn’t switch lightbulbs,” he retorted and watched with satisfaction as the mischievous smile dissipated from Junho’s face. He actually looked pale at the thought.

“That’s what I get for wanting to spend time with my friend and roommate who will miss me when I eventually move out?” His puppy eyes were back and Inho sighed again.

“Go do your job Junho.”

Junho pouted and started walking away.

Inho stared at him as he walked and against his better judgment, an instinctual decision was suddenly made and he registered saying “I’ll wait for you,” before his mind even caught up.

Junho who had almost been by the corner of the corridor, looked back and smiled so widely. “You’re the best,” he cheered almost too loudly in the empty space before disappearing.

Inho shook his head fondly again.

He took off his uniform and placed it in the closet carefully instead of throwing it aimlessly as he had grown accustomed to doing during the last three weeks. He changed into his casual clothes and decided not to wear a jacket even if the weather got chilly at night. He never cared about feeling cold. When he got drunk enough he wouldn’t feel a thing.

He laid on the bed and contemplated what to do. Staying alone with his thoughts without having the prospect of sleeping in his mind was unacceptable. Junho should be done in half an hour if he was quick enough.

He opened the drawer next to his bed and found the unsent letters addressed to him.

He took one to reread it. Reminding himself of the reason to live was necessary every now and then.

His sister’s anxiety was more understandable to him now than ever before. Another piece broke inside when he realized that he could understand her better after it had been too late.

His biggest regret in life—and he has many—might be not understanding her while she had still been there. Not understanding her needs and protecting her the way he should’ve.

If only he’d known…

When he went to put the letters back in the drawer he saw a small beige almost rumpled looking thing in the back of the drawer. He went to grab it and felt its delicate form crumble in his rough grip.

It was a wilted daisy

From a day where he had been unlucky enough to stumble across one.

He’d taken it against all logic. Trying to feel close, trying to cherish it and hide it from the world.

But when he later realized he’d succumbed to his weakness by taking it, he pushed it to the back to the drawer and decided to forget about it. Let it die slowly in the darkness.

Left to be neglected until its inevitable doom.

It was almost a challenge for him to succeed. To ignore, to punish it until it was not longer anything but dust.

He stared at it for a long time until he swiftly decided to speed up the process and prove something to himself. He closed his fist around it tightly, feeling it break even if it was nothing but a soft flower. He stood up and only opened his fist again when it was above the bin, letting it fall to its early grave.

It had only been fifteen minutes since Junho had gone but it felt too long. He paced restlessly around the room, pondering whether to stay put and wait or whether to go to Junho and stay with him until he was done.

He looked at the bin one last time and decided to go to Junho. He felt suffocated in the room and he wasn’t even sure why. He walked upstairs to the ground floor and wasn’t surprised by the complete darkness that engulfed the hotel. It usually always dark at this hour anyway but Junho had probably shut down the fuse of electricity before going to switch the light bulbs. He had never wandered around in the pitch black hours before and he felt a distinct cold feeling dawn over him in the darkness.

He opened the door that connected the staff area to the main hall and was surprised to find the light on in the giant place. He walked around, staring around to find Junho and ask if he was done already. He spotted the large empty ladder that Junho had to use and headed towards it.

He froze abruptly

Junho

Was lying on the ground next to it, a broken lightbulb next to him.

“Junho,” he gasped before sprinting to him, immediately falling to his knees by his side.

“Junho?!” He shook him slightly and placed his head on his chest to feel a pulse.

He couldn’t feel a thing.

“JUNHO,” he grew more panicked, raising his unconscious body slightly by the shoulders and grabbing his head with a hand.

He felt his hand moisten behind Junho’s head and knew what it was.

He still gasped sharply when the blood showed itself as he withdrew his hand.

No

This can’t be happening

This can’t happen

Not again

He wouldn’t let it happen

Inho laid Junho back down on the ground and stood up quickly, only hesitating to leave him alone for a second before deciding to run to the door of the kitchens.

He opened it and went only a few steps down the stairs before yelling for help. He didn’t give a shit who he would wake up but he also wouldn’t go too far and leave Junho alone in the room. He had the strongest instinct not to leave Junho alone, like his presence could stop his state from deteriorating.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong?” Came Mr Park’s alert voice finally. He was hurrying to the stairs in an almost sluggish way of someone who had his sleep interrupted.

“JUNHO IS HURT.  GET HELP NOW!”

Mr Park froze in shock before running back away to his office.

When Inho knew that Park would get an ambulance, he ran back to Junho. He grabbed a silky table cloth, uncaring that he’d pulled it hastily from a table where all the fancy centerpieces fell to the ground. He fell to his knees again next to Junho and wrapped the cloth around his head.

“Junho hang in there okay?” His shaking hand that wasn’t holding the cloth to his bleeding head found its way to his cheek and started holding it loosely.

Suddenly it wasn’t Junho he was holding in his arms.

It was Saebyeok.

Inho couldn’t see properly through the mist in his eyes. There was no difference.

She was stiff like Junho, unmoving, eyes closed, not with him.

The only difference he could feel as he still couldn’t see, was that she wasn’t warm like Junho had been moments before.

“Please, please,” he started whispering mindlessly, clenching his eyes shut to shake off the fog that let him see his sister.

“Stay with me please,” he whispered as he neared Junho to his chest. This way he could fool himself that he was protecting him and shielding him from anything that could hurt him.

He felt hurrying footsteps approaching, eventually halting next to him and even though he knew it must’ve been Park he still couldn’t let Junho go.

“Inho, how did this happen?”

“I don’t know,” he croaked with a desperate tone without looking up at him.

Mr. Park paused and walked closer to the ladder where Junho must have been standing when he fell.

“I think he got electrocuted and fell.”

Inho didn’t say anything because an odd dark feeling hit his guts. But he wouldn’t and couldn’t think of anything right now. The only thing that mattered was saving Junho.

Saving his brother.

“Inho, he’ll be okay. I- I know it,” Park said in a small cautious voice and he noticed only through his tone that he had clutched Junho closer to him.

“Son?”

Inho looked up and saw Ms Jang standing in shock, looking disheveled as she must have hurried to dress after Mr. Park told her.

She ran and dropped to her knees next to him in a panic, holding Junho’s cheeks in her hands.

She too was shaking like him.

“How? How? Junho? Son wake up, Junho honey I’m here now, wake up, wake up son.” She kept repeating in a mantra and not stopping as the ambulance came and took them to the hospital. They had hesitated to let him go with Junho and Jang, but one look from him was enough to silence everyone.

He wouldn’t leave Junho alone.

It took half an hour for the doctor to show himself to them in the bustling hospital corridor. Inho felt the cold of an entire bucket full of ice falling on him when he saw the look on his face. Jang Geumja nearly ran to stand in front of him. “How is he? How’s my son?!” She was straining to sound composed but her body language gave her fear away.

The doctor took a deep breath before talking and Inho almost had the urge to hit him.

“He is stable for now. The good thing is that you found him fast enough for us to save,”

Ms. Jang and him didn’t breathe or sigh in relief because both of them felt the ‘but’ incoming.

“But he is unfortunately comatose…we don’t know how harmful the head injury was and we wont be able to find out until he wakes up again. His leg has also sustained an injury from the fall and will need time to recover.”

Ms. Jang frowned deeper than before only now it wasn’t in concentration but rather in annoyance. “When will he wake up?”

The doctor looked away and Inho knew that it didn’t mean anything good.

“He fell from a considerable height and that affected him on top of having possible nerve damage from the electrocu-”

“Answer her question,” he interrupted quietly with a overly calm voice. The doctor looked anxiously at him for a moment before turning back to Jang with regained composure.

“We don’t know when he will wake up,” he finished lamely, bowing his head as if worried he will be held responsible by Inho.

“How- what do- how do you not know?!” Ms Jang looked livid as she started to walk closer to the doctor. Inho found himself holding her arm gently, not necessarily to restrain her—because there was simply no way of stopping a mother when it came to her child and especially not when it’s Ms. Jang— but to remind her that she wasn’t alone. She wouldn’t have to face any of this alone.

She might not know it but Junho was his family too.

Ms. Jang didn’t fight off his grip, instead holding her head in her hands and sobbing quietly. The doctor looked anxiously at him again and Inho nodded sideways to dismiss him. The man looked relieved as he walked away. Inho looked back at Jang and started guiding her to the chairs next to Junho’s room. She dropped and started crying harder, muffled sobs echoing in his ears.

He didn’t drop her arm, just moved it to her shoulder and kept holding her as she sobbed.

Hours passed and the only thing that changed was that they sat next to Junho, each on one side. They sat in a silence that would only be interrupted by Inho occasionally asking whether she needed anything. She kept refusing any food or water or even a blanket and Inho just got her these things anyway and laid them on the table next to her, even putting the blanket over her shaking shoulders.

He didn’t want to leave Junho alone but as long as he was with his mother then it was alright. More hours passed and Kang Noeul came bursting in with tears welling up the moment she saw Junho. Ms. Jang immediately looked at him and they shared a moment of understanding and a mutual feeling of dislike towards the heavily pregnant omega. She started complaining loudly why nobody bothered to tell her, sneering at Ms. Jang that she was Junho’s wife whether she liked it or not.

Ms. Jang looked at him again and he promptly stood up and gently—only because she was pregnant—got Noeul out of the room.

“How can she keep this from me? Does she know how it felt to hear this from staff?!”

“Noeul, we had to go to the hospital quickly in order to save his life. Sorry we didn’t take the time to stop by first,” he said impatiently and she pursed her lips in annoyance.

“Could’ve let me know after.”

“Noeul cut us some slack. It’s not like we hid it on purpose-”

“She did! I know it!”

“Trust me Noeul, you didn’t occupy a single thought in her mind today,” he said in complete seriousness.

Noeul looked at him in dislike and he looked back blankly, his face not giving any slight feeling away. They just stared at each other and they both knew that they didn’t like each other. Usually Noeul was direct to those she disliked but for some reason akin to fearing him or perhaps not knowing enough about him, she stayed silent in her subtle dislike. She didn’t like him, but she didn’t know enough dirt about him to show it either. Inho also knew that she felt unsettled by his constant presence in Junho’s life and knew again that she couldn’t do or say anything about it.

“Can you sit inside quietly or not? Without getting in any discussions or even talking to Ms. Jang?” He looked at her pointedly and after a slight hesitation, she nodded.

They entered together and Jang seemed surprised to see Noeul again, looking quickly at Inho as if questioning why he had granted her entrance. He nodded at her reassuringly and pulled a new chair next to his own for Noeul to sit down on.

The air was filled with tension and yet Inho wouldn’t or more like couldn’t leave. Whenever he made the slightest movement, both women would look at him with a sort of pleading urgency as if begging him not to leave one alone with the other.

He sighed and sat staring at Junho.

How could this have happened? Junho had been at the hotel since birth. It wasn’t his first time cleaning and switching these lamps. He must’ve done it hundreds of times before.

So how could he be so stupid and forget to close the fuse before doing this task?

The fuse had to have been still turned on and that’s how he got electrocuted and how he fell off the long ladder.

Inho remembered his off putting feelings earlier in the room while he waited for Junho. Remembered the sudden last second urge to agree, to wait for him. He also remembered the moment staying in the room was too much too handle for some reason. He had been early. He had gone early to Junho, to keep him company or help him hurry up.

He was supposed to wait longer.

Until Junho was done.

If he had waited…it would’ve been too late to save him.

He would’ve lost too much blood, his heart would’ve lost the small weak pulse that was still there.

If he had refused to go entirely, then he would’ve went to sleep and never realized that Junho was dying upstairs.

He closed his eyes, shuddering at the thought.

It was pain and fear he felt in the moment. Feelings he wasn’t sure he was capable of feeling after Saebyeok’s funeral and Gihun’s wedding.

Gihun

He would be devastated for Junho. He loves Junho and always has since forever.

Mr. Seong cares about all the employees, the bitter voice reminded him.

But he had to admit that Junho was different.

Special

He means so much to so many people and he probably doesn’t even know it the little idiot.

His poor idiot..

He opened his eyes again to look at Junho only to find Jang looking at him with a sad sympathetic expression. A kinder look than he’d ever seen her give anyone else.

He tried to soften his expression for her but how could he?

She doesn’t know what he’d seen in this hotel. Couldn’t know the agony he’d gone through so far. Wouldn’t know that he had a bad feeling about Junho’s accident and he couldn’t even tell himself why. He reckons that after everything he’d gone through with Saebyeok, he simply always assumed the worst and would rush to see a conspiracy everywhere.

Hours turned into days, days turned into weeks and Junho was still sleeping. It had been two weeks since the accident and Junho had now returned to the hotel after days of intensive care. Still, Inho hadn’t let Junho out of his sight during those weeks. He had slept every night on the uncomfortable hospital chair next to his bed, taking a vacation from work until Junho was allowed back to the hotel. He couldn’t explain the instinct that ordered him not to leave Junho alone at that hospital, well it probably was his fear of losing one more person he cared about. Ms. Jang was surprised by his concern and overprotective caution. He knew she thought his concern over Junho would fade when they’d return to the Grand but she had been mistaken. If anything, his caution was heightened after they had returned to the hotel. Inho remained by his bed side whenever he wasn’t working and whenever he had to work, he’d make sure someone else was either by his side or arrange for someone to regularly check on him. Most days however, he himself would take numerous short breaks instead of one big break in order to check on Junho as often as possible. Mr. Park joked that he was behaving like Junho’s real mother and that perhaps Ms. Jang was the fraud here. Shockingly, instead of being offended, Jang agreed with a weak smile that attempted to be humorous.

Inho, Ms. Jang and Noeul had made a subtle peace pact since Junho’s return to the hotel. They had a rotation where one of them would stay with Junho until the next one came and so on. Ms. Jang had arranged a bigger room with queen sized bed and a private bathroom for Junho where the nurse and doctor can come check up on him regularly without intruding Inho’s space. Inho had tried to object but Jang said that she would feel better if her son finally had his own room that he had asked her for. The one she’d kept denying him before. When he saw the tears form in her eyes, he’d relented as long as he was allowed to stay by his side and spend the nights if need be. She had given him a gentle genuine smile and thanked him for being there for Junho.

“Thank you so much Youngil, Junho is very lucky to have you as his friend and I say that despite all your drinking at Kim’s,” she said in a motherly stern tone that he told him she wasn’t being passive aggressive but just being mildly scolding in order to feel sane. “If it weren’t for you checking on him in the first place, he might’ve…” she trailed off, looking pained at the mere thought.

He had to stop her from going down that rabbit hole. It was endless suffering to think of what ifs.

“Ms. Jang,” he took a deep breath, thinking of what to say. “I wouldn’t let anything happen to Junho…he’s my brother,” he said quietly, incapable of looking her in the eye because of the bitter voice that was echoing that he once had a sister that he was supposed to protect as well. Where was she?

That voice wouldn’t let him live.

He looked up at her when he felt her hand holding his upper arm gently.

She smiled. “He says the same thing about you.”

Inho eyes glistened inspite of himself and he smiled back weakly.

Kang Noeul came out of the room, wiping at her eyes. They both stared at her in silence. Noeul had been crying a lot and Inho couldn’t help being surprised. He still didn’t change his opinion about her but it still surprised him anyway. She seemed genuinely scared of losing Junho and it was something that had made him and Ms. Jang kinder to her.

She sniffled before looking at Jang in annoyance. “Why can’t I stay with him? Why wont you allow me? I’m his WIFE. When will you finally get over it?!”

“I said it before. Junho will stay undisturbed at night,” she replied coldly before walking to the door behind Noeul.

Well, the unofficial peace pact wasn’t permanent.

“Well then why can Youngil stay overnight huh? Why can you? Why not me, I can take care of him?!” She tried blocking the door but Jang had already opened it.

She glanced at her stiffly. “Because I trust him,” she muttered coolly and closed the door behind her.

He saw Noeul’s eyes bulge in shock and anger. Before he knew it, he’d already went to stand between her and the door, preventing her from entering the room and making a scene. “Please calm down-”

“How should I calm down Youngil, didn’t you hear her?!”

“I know, I know. Excuse her for now, it’s her son after all,” he tried to reason with her.

“And he’s my husband!” She spat it angrily, like it was a right she was entitled to.

“You’re right but you need to calm down for the baby. Look, you know how it is. You argue and then you both calm down and focus on what really matters which is Junho and his health.”

Speaking of Junho’s health calmed her down immensely. She swallowed, like she was swallowing down the anger and the arguments and nodded before leaving quietly.

Inho sighed and rubbed at his face tiredly. They would calm down again and maybe Ms. Jang will have another weak moment where she treated Noeul well. It happened once or twice the last two weeks.

The next day, news came. Mr. Seong and his husband were returning the next day. Everyone was rejoicing the happy news. Everyone except for him that is. He spent the day like all others, next to Junho. He stayed silent for minutes before allowing himself to talk to Junho as he always did while he tended to him. He had finished drying off the sweat of Junho’s face when he started talking.

“So…don’t you want to wake up soon? It’s been nearly three weeks now.”

No answer.

Junho was still completely gone.

“You know. I- I didn’t think you’d give me that big of a scare. After everything… I didn’t expect to be so terrified again…” he huffed an incredulous chuckle. “Turns out you mean a lot to me. Did you want to test that?”

Silence

“I’ve had many reasons to stay here you know, stayed for Saebyeok, stayed for- him, stayed for revenge, but tell you the truth right now I’m staying for you.” He smiled wistfully at Junho. “You don’t believe me do you?… But it’s true Junho, I swear. I’ve had one foot out of this place ever since he- you know…but you- you reminded me not be an idiot. Made me remember not to forget my annoying little brother.” He pinched Junho’s cheek fondly. “ everything is so dull and lifeless without you. You bring life to this place and to me and I would never tell you this if you were awake. Can’t let you get too cocky after all. I wouldn’t hear the end of it.”

His smile morphed into a pained one.

“Just come back okay?”

The next day came too soon. Inho took the day off and Mr. Park had immediately agreed with a sympathetic look. He remained with Junho, shaving his face with extreme concentration. Willing himself not to think about what’s happening upstairs.

“He’s back Junho. Can you imagine that it has been over a month since the last time I’d seen him?” He smiled cruelly. “You wouldn’t believe me but I have gathered such an unbearable anger towards him. That anger makes me live without becoming too weak. He’s Mr. Seong to me now. I’ll make sure of it... But everything’s easier to say when you can’t see the person who’s been driving you mad.”

Inho could imagine the bitch face Junho would give him for that. “Don’t worry, I wont do anything stupid.”

And then because it felt impossible not to say. “Come back Junho, I miss you.”

Gihun was going to throw hands. How- how did no one tell him? How did nobody bother to tell him about Junho’s accident?

“You should’ve told me immediately!” He was scowling at Ms. Jang while simultaneously looking worried.

“We didn’t want to scare you-”

“How should I not worry? He’s been in a coma for WEEKS!”

“I know,” Geumja started breaking down, her sobs getting louder. Gihun immediately dropped it and rushed to hug her tightly.

“He’ll be alright. I’ll make sure he’s alright. It’s okay, I’m right here with you,” he stroked her back soothingly. “I’ll go visit him now. Let’s go-”

“I- I can’t. I have to go to the staff and give them dinner instructions. Give me a bit and I’ll come join you there.” She went right when he nodded. He wanted to hit himself for being insensitive towards her. He- he just lost it when they let him know in the lobby. That had even only happened because he had asked about Junho and Jang Geumja. At the end of the day he only got so mad because he considers them his family. He started heading to the room Geumja told him about. It was good that he had his own room because else he probably would’ve run into-

He opened the door

Him

There he was, handsome as ever. Exhausted and haunted like he had always been as he sat by Junho’s bed side.

Inho looked at him

They both remembered the same moment at the altar.

The moment they gave up in resignation and defeat.

Inho looked away first.

Gihun didn’t know how he could do that, let alone breathe.

Inho patted Junho’s face with a small towel, before standing up and walking towards him.

Gihun’s eyes quickly went to Junho. Junho is safe, focus on Junho.

But Inho wasn’t stopping or slowing his steps. It looked like he was heading towards the door behind him without stopping for a single second. The door he’d apparently instinctively closed behind him.

When did he do that?

“Hello Youngil.”

How did he do that?

Inho halted in front of him and he realized that he was still standing in front of the door. He moved a few steps away from the door to not seem like he was blocking it. Inho was free to leave if he didn’t wish to speak to him.

So why did it hurt so much when it seemed like Inho was contemplating whether to answer?

“Welcome back Mr. Seong.” It was short, cold, distant and Gihun knew it was the right way to talk. The only reasonable way for them to communicate. Still didn’t stop it from stinging like fire though.

Inho was avoiding his eyes just like he was avoiding his. But it seems like they both weren’t the best at doing that because there were seconds where he got glimpses of Inho’s eyes looking at him and Inho must’ve seen his eyes doing the same. But what he noticed is that there was a difference in those eyes he couldn’t get enough of before.

They weren’t gentle

Not loving or sad or even angry

They were numb and distant in a way he had never seen from Inho before. Not even in his worst moments. Even when he had lost his sister, Inho’s eyes had still given him the feeling that even though he was done with the world, he wasn’t done with him.

This wasn’t there anymore.

It was as though he was a complete stranger to Inho.

It was fair.

He focused his eyes on Junho so it would seem like the tears that were building were for him. “How is Junho?”

He suspects that Inho noticed his eyes glistening because he spoke in a kinder tone. “He will get better. The doctor has been giving him a new medication that should help him wake up.”

This didn’t make Gihun feel better. Of course he didn’t mean Junho waking up, he just…he didn’t know how to even feel at the moment. There he was, having prepared himself for over a whole month not to care, not to see and not to even talk to Inho and yet not even a whole hour back and it was all falling apart already.

And Inho addressing him kindly out of pity made it hurt even more. He felt suddenly as though he was the lesser prepared one here.

Like he was the loser.

He nodded with a small polite smile without looking at Inho.

“Excuse me,” Inho said in a neutral tone once again and left the room, closing the door behind him.

Gihun cried the same instant while still looking at Junho.

It wasn’t dramatic. Just small droplets falling on his face as he stared at Junho.

But the pain was ever so present as if no time had passed at all.

He approached Junho and sat down next to him, opposite side from where Inho had just been.

“He’s lucky to have you Junho,” he smiled at him as wiped away his tears. “At least when he needs to talk to someone, he has you…even if you’re just sleeping like this and can’t say anything. Letting things out helps with the pain…I on the other hand have no one to talk to. I can’t complain, not even to myself. How can I when my choices led me here?… I don’t even want be alone just so I don’t have to think about him. I tried to postpone our return just so I wouldn’t have to see him, because I was sure that when I’d see him, I’d be feeling the way that I’m feeling right now.” His own voice came out cracked, broken and he felt his eyes welling up again.

“I can’t make myself fall in love with Sangwoo despite all of the love he’s showing me. Do you know why?” He wiped away at his damp cheek.

“Because you can’t force yourself to fall in love with someone when you’re already in love with someone else.”

He looked at his lap, holding his own hand too tightly. “And I love him Junho,” he shrugged helplessly, seeing his clothes darken with small wet spots.

“I love him so much,” he whispered, sniffling quietly in the lonely room.

“Sangwoo calm down,” he said gently as he watched his husband pace around their suite.

“How can I calm down? I can’t believe your mother would do this to me.”

“It’s just a title so what?” Deep down he understood why his mother’s decision had bothered Sangwoo.

“Title- Gihun I was the general manager of the Grand Hotel. Just because we left for our honeymoon, she suddenly decides to make Myunggi the general manger?! Making me his second in command? Letting me find out through Junhee’s bragging?”

“Sangwoo,” he said warningly.

Sangwoo stopped pacing and stared almost sheepishly at him. “I’m sorry honey. I understand that Junhee is just happy for her husband. It just hurt that she practically demoted me while we were on our honeymoon. It’s unfair and without any reason.”

It was unusual that his mother had decided to switch out Sangwoo with Myunggi and Sangwoo was right, it was hurtful not to let him know beforehand. But Gihun didn’t think it was that big of a deal. At the end of the day, they were all in the same family. One and the same.

Before he could answer however, his mother entered their suite with a swift knock, not bothering to wait for them to answer. She looked at Sangwoo pointedly. “Sangwoo, come with me.” She walked away as quickly as she came and Sangwoo scowled as he went to follow her.

Gihun stood up quickly and went to get himself busy with anyone he’d find.

After trying to spend time with his sister and finding her on edge and annoyed with nearly everything, he resigned himself to Mrs Kang’s company and stayed with her until it was time for dinner.

Gihun noticed an instant interesting change in Sangwoo’s behavior as he joined the table with none other than Myunggi. They were walking side by side with smiles on their faces, his earlier scowl long forgotten.

How odd, he thought.

Why did Sangwoo look suddenly at ease with the prospect of being second in command? How did his mother calm him down so much that he even looked happy?

It didn’t sit right with him, feeling like he’d once again missed something crucial in the equation. It made him on edge.

Annoyed even.

“We need to get our family’s doctor, Dr. Han, for Junho,” he said loudly at the table that consisted of his entire family and Mrs Kang who rather often joined them. Though he suspected she only did it because she was bored and found his family to be entertaining.

His mother gave him a side glance. “I told you I tried calling him but I’m not getting an answer,” she replied smoothly.

He had the annoying feeling that she was lying.

“I can have my husband’s formal doctor come see him. He was great,” added Mrs Kang kindly.

“I hope he wasn’t Mr. Kang’s doctor in his final days,” joked Sangwoo and Gihun immediately glared at him.

“You need to go see him Sangwoo. Junho is Ms. Jang’s son, he’s one of us,” he said firmly, still glaring at his husband.

Sangwoo looked at him with an easy smile on his face. “Even though I disagree with the one of us part, I shall go see him,” he said with humour in his tone.

Gihun narrowed his eyes in anger.

“Anyway, didn’t you say that he was comatose? He wouldn’t even know,” Sangwoo continued without noticing his anger at all.

Before he could make his annoyance clear, Myunggi interjected. “Still, it’s about doing an act of kindness and paying the person respect by going to see them anyway.” Gihun nodded in agreement.

“I think it’s enough if you go see him Myunggi,” his mother said it professionally, without an ounce of feeling in her words.

“No, Sangwoo has to go visit him as well,” he said glaring at his mother. He must’ve sounded loud and too emotional because Sangwoo looked at him with sympathetic smile that was supposed to placate him.

“Honey it’s okay, I told you I’ll go,” he smiled soothingly again. Only it didn’t soothe him at all.

He looked mindlessly around the main hall and then sighed in disappointment.

Inho closed the book and leaned back on the bench next to Youngmi. They had just finished another short reading lesson. He’d stopped these lessons because of Junho’s accident, preferring to tend to Junho rather than doing anything else but he knew that Ms. Jang was taking care of him now and with Youngmi looking at him like an abandoned puppy, he couldn’t resist helping her again.

She was a kind soul.

“I’m really worried about Junho…I keep wondering if there’s anything I can do to help him,” she said with a sad pout. Inho’s gaze softened slightly and he gave her a fleeting shadowy smile.

“There’s nothing you can do. Just keep an eye on Noeul.”

“Noeul, oh the poor girl. You- pardon me but I always felt like she was cold and emotionless. But ever since the accident, she’s been so different. Her head is always elsewhere and she barely sleeps.”

Inho took out a cigarette and started smoking. He knew she was affected by Junho’s ordeal, but he didn’t know it was that bad.

“I worry about her. Sometimes I turn to look at her bed at night and I don’t find her…and then she suddenly reappears from underneath my bed like she was scared of something and was hiding.” Youngmi looked concerned and sad for her roommate but Inho didn’t say a thing.

His mind was too caught up with something she’d just said.

She reappears from underneath my bed

The bed that used to be..

Saebyeok’s

The bed with the hiding spot underneath, where he’d found his sister’s unsent letters.

He frowned as it dawned on him.

“Your bed?” He echoed quietly, still frowning.

“Yes, I swear. What if she’s gone crazy,” she said it with a naïve conviction.

Inho smoked again

What is she hiding there

“I have to go back to work, will we have our lesson tomorrow again?” She asked him, looking hopeful as she stood up.

He nodded without saying anything further.

If Youngmi is going back to work and Noeul was going to visit Junho soon then...

He has to go and see whatever she’s hiding there.

He waited until he saw her heading to Junho’s room and once she was out of sight, he rushed to the room he hadn’t been in for a long time.

Back when Saebyeok was still-

It was a lifetime ago.

He hurried underneath the bed, removing the wooden tile with anticipation.

Could it be that she had the key? Or something that would bring him closer to the truth?

The tile gave way and he was suddenly facing an old folded piece of paper. He grabbed it quickly and stood back up, facing the empty bed.

A paper

He unfolded it

A letter

Was it the letter?

The letter his sister had died for?

I, Seong Ilnam, being of sound mind, not acting under duress or under influence and fully understanding the nature and extent of all my property and disposition thereof, do hereby declare that Hwang Junho is my biological son and that he is the rightful owner of the Grand Hotel. I, Seong Ilnam, confirm that his birth certificate surname Hwang is thus falsified and that his real legal surname is thereby Seong. As the law dictates, Junho is to inherit 50% of the Grand Hotel’s ownership as he is the only of my children to have presented as an alpha. The other 50% is to be distributed to both of my other children, Seong Gihun and Seong Junhee with each of them owning 25% of the Grand Hotel. Junho is to be the main owner and leader of the Grand hotel.

I declare this as my last and only true will.

Seong Ilnam

Chapter Text

Inho was gaping at the parchment and in his shock, he didn’t notice that someone had entered the room. The letter was quickly snatched away from his hand. He turned around and found Noeul standing right behind him, folding the letter back and stashing it under her dress in a hurry.

“Give that back,” he muttered, still dazed.

“No! How- what are you even doing here? You can’t be in here!” She spoke angrily but her eyes were wide in shock. He wondered if she really had the nerve to be scared.

Inho advanced in her direction, “hand me that letter.”

“No. You need to leave before we get into trouble,” she took a step backward for each step he took forward.

“Where did you find it?”

She didn’t answer, she only tried to smile bravely like she was in control.

Another important question jumped to mind.

“Does Junho know?”

“No, he doesn’t.”

Inho stopped and looked at her, at the concealed fear behind her smile. Junho didn’t know. But she had.

“That’s why you married him.” It wasn’t a question. It was the truth and they both knew it.

“No! I only found out a few days before the accident. It was after we’d already married,” she tried to convince him but he knew better than to trust her. “You need to leave right now before anyone finds you here!”

“Why didn’t you tell Junho about it then?”

“Because I was shocked just like you were. I was scared and confused and then the accident happened…and no one else could know because they would harm me next and I can’t defend myself,” she said with a certain conviction that told him that part of it was true. She had to have been scared after Junho’s accident and she certainly wasn’t in any position to defend herself in the case the Seongs found out that she had the letter.

“And what about Junho? Junho couldn’t defend himself either!” He was beginning to lose his mind here. His thoughts were beginning to tangle in a horrible knot that would surely make his head explode.

“No but Junho has a right! He can defend himself once it’s all out in the open. No one can harm him then!”

“Well they already did, didn’t they!”

“He will be fine again. I wouldn’t be if anyone finds out! I’m just a maid!”

“Oh don’t say that about yourself. You’re his wife after all. Pregnant with a baby that will have his name. His fortune,” he smirked at her menacingly.

“Youngil. If anyone finds out about this before Junho is back to normal, he will be harmed and he might not recover this time. They probably even planned his accident.”

Inho remembered the odd feeling he had the night of the accident, remembered questioning how Junho could forget such a crucial step in his task. He hated to admit that a part of him had suspected foul play but up until now, he couldn’t think of a reason why anyone would bother harming Junho.

A simple worthless employee to them.

No, he was the bloody owner of this whole establishment.

“I wouldn’t put it beyond them after they got rid of a girl for some jewelry.” Inho simply looked at her, hiding his surprise.

She meant Saebyeok and the mere mention of her made him roughly push her to the nearest wall, caging her in between his arms. She groaned in pain but he didn’t care.

“Fine, I’ll let you keep that letter for now. But I swear to god if you ever try to harm or backstab Junho, I will make your life miserable. Understood?” She looked at him with fear reflected in her eyes and nodded.

He walked quickly, without even thinking, back to Junho’s room. He closed the door behind him and started pacing.

He finally found the letter.

“I’m going crazy.” He walked to the opposite wall.

The secret weapon Saebyeok had tried to use against them.

“This is insane.” He walked back to the door.

It’s about Junho…

He stopped and stared at Junho, who was still sleeping.

“Junho this is insane.”

He went to his bed side, sitting on the edge of the bed and touched his upper arms carefully before dropping a hand to Junho’s and holding it gently. “You wouldn’t believe any of this. But- Junho you’re the owner of this whole place,” he chuckled humourlessly.

“I work for you,” he chuckled again, this time with something real because frankly the whole thing was absurd.

His smile dropped as a thought hit him.

“I’m in love with your-” he paused.

“Gihun is your brother. They’re-” before he could continue, he felt faint movement over his hand. Inho looked down in wonder and saw Junho’s fingers squeezing his own.

“Junho?” He looked back up in hope. “Junho can you hear me?” Junho started moving his head slowly. He moved closer to him, his smile returning brighter than it had been in a long time.

“Inho,” he whispered back quietly, still too tired to formulate a sentence.

“Junho!” He started laughing in awe. He felt like an annoying piece of him was back. And yet it was a piece he’d missed so damn much.

He jumped off the bed and rushed out the corridor, running to the kitchen were Ms. Jang stood talking to Mr. Park.

“Ms. Jang!” She turned around quickly and looked terrified before noticing his smile and calming down. Mr. Park had apparently immediately spotted his smile and already looked excited. “He’s waking up,” he smiled as he saw her jump slightly before running to the room herself. Mr. Park was beaming as he clapped him on the back.

An hour later, he sat on the chair in front of Junho’s bed, watching as Noeul sat next to Junho while stroking his hand happily. Junho looked like he was in heaven.

“I can’t believe that I spent all this time sleeping.”

“Well it didn’t stop you from saying all kinds of crap. What was that all about?” He said in a serious tone, his face blank as ever. He couldn’t help but prank his clueless idiot.

Junho looked paler than he already had. “What? I-” he looked at Noeul who pretended to look hurt as she played along. “Noeul I didn’t mean any of it! I swear!”

Inho smirked. “You idiot, you were in a coma. You were completely gone.”

“I was worried sick about you Junho,” she said looking sad. Inho raised his eyebrows mockingly.

“Don’t do this again. Me and our son, we need you.” Inho shifted uncomfortably in his chair, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

“Noeul this is the first time I see you so worried about me. First time- you look at me with love in your eyes,” he whispered to her gently, looking ecstatic.

Inho wanted to vomit.

“Well you must be blind then, like your mother-”

“Speaking of which, your mother was the most worried about you. She was losing her mind,” he interrupted loudly. He was feeling protective of Ms. Jang and wouldn’t let Noeul talk shit about her to her own son.

“She wasn’t the only one. Junho she wouldn’t allow me to stay with you. She only let me see through a freaking schedule.”

“By the way Junho. How could you forget to shut down the fuse first?” He interrupted her yet again and this time with the goal to confirm the bad feeling he’d had ever since the accident.

“Who said that? Hyung this isn’t the first time I do this. Of course I turned it off first.” Inho glanced at Noeul and found her already looking at him with a worried expression.

He stayed by Junho’s side even after Noeul left. He told him about everything he’d missed which was surprisingly not much. The only main events were that Mr. Seong—he still refused to call him Gihun—was back, that Myunggi was the main general manager now and that the Grand’s booking list was still too short for everyone’s liking. By the time he was talking about annoying guests, Junho had fell asleep.

He smiled at him before leaving the room. Once he was in the corridor, he found Noeul waiting for him, looking anxious.

“He fell asleep,” he said curtly and went to walk away.

“Youngil.”

He turned back to look at her.

“Did you tell him anything?”

“No. But I will eventually.”

She looked tense as she walked two steps closer to him. “No, you heard the doctor, you cant tell him anything that will stress him out.”

“Didn’t I just say that I haven’t said anything yet?”

“Well we need to plan how to tell him together. So he doesn’t get a major shock.”

“Well aren’t you kindhearted,” he retorted.

They stared at each other and barely noticed a new figure approaching the corridor.

It was G- Mr. Seong.

They stopped talking as he came closer with a timid smile on his face. He was holding a large bouquet.

“Hello,” he greeted politely, mainly looking at Noeul.

Inho didn’t want to look at him but noticed how Gihun—no—Mr. Seong glanced at him nervously, almost even uncomfortably, before smiling brightly at Noeul. “I’m so glad Junho is finally okay.”

Inho found that he couldn’t stay here. He couldn’t deal with the conflicting feelings he had whenever he saw Mr. Seong.

“Excuse me,” he muttered quietly and walked away without waiting.

He missed Gihun’s glance and only heard him hand the bouquet over to Noeul.

He busied himself the next few hours, knowing that Junho would be safe for the time being. His mind kept deissecting the letter and every word it said. He kept thinking about everything. His sister, Junho, Gi- even Noeul and the fact that she knew everything. Speaking of which, Noeul found him a while later smoking outside. He wasn’t used to talking to her so much and it was starting to annoy him.

“Gihunssi interrupted us last time,” she said simply as she went to stand next to him.

“What else do you want to say?”

“Instead of worrying about Junho because of me, you should worry about whoever did this to him instead. Or do you think it was me who’d done this Junho,” she said with a nasty smirk.

“No, you’re not that dumb.”

She laughed quietly. “Well then who did it?”

He knew who was responsible for this. It needed no effort to come to the same conclusion that he always reached.

It was always, always, Sangwoo.

“Someone who needs the order here to stay the same.” He wouldn’t be the first to reveal his thoughts. Especially not to Kang Noeul.

“And what if I told you that the one who’s responsible wasn’t even in the country the night of the accident?”

Ah there it was, he thought. She’s bringing him up after all.

“Mr. Cho?” He played dumb. He always has to play dumb with people like her.

“Who else? No one is more threatened of losing everything if the secret should come out. The late Mr. Seong Ilnam’s will dictated that Sangwoo should be involved in leading the hotel. But now that we know that his final will says otherwise and doesn’t even mention him. Well, it’s clear that he’d be the most determined to get rid of him. Sangwoo was the closest thing to an alpha son for the family. Now though, with Junho being there. He’s simply nothing.”

Inho didn’t know about the other will and that it had mentioned Sangwoo leading the hotel. It suddenly made sense why Saebyeok felt the need to protect Sangwoo when she stumbled across the letter. She said she had worried about his rights and he hadn’t understood why back then.

“Seems like you thought a lot about it,” he smiled at her sarcastically.

“Didn’t you just say that I’m not dumb?” She smiled back.

He refrained from saying that he explicitly said not that dumb. He thought about what to say next and quickly decided to continue playing dumb. Hopefully she would reveal more, like she just had.

“And how would he even know about what the letter says? How would he even know that it exists?”

He knew the answers of course. It had been his own sister who had told Sangwoo about everything. Still, he wanted Noeul to assume he knew less.

She just smiled and didn’t answer. She probably doesn’t know the answer herself or else she would’ve bragged by now.

“You’re spoiling me you know,” Sangwoo said happily as he took another bite from the food he’d prepared for him himself. Well, Sangwoo had asked him if he could make them a meal as a compromise for refusing to go out and having lunch together. He’d quickly agreed because he found it difficult to be outside with Sangwoo. To have his entire undivided attention. It was too much for him to handle and cooking a meal and eating it in the veranda was way easier for him than leaving the hotel.

“I’m still learning but I promise that I’ll learn a new recipe every week,” he smiled shakily and focused on his food.

“I love you.”

Gihun’s smile froze for just a second as he stared at his plate. He looked back up and smiled wider, unkowing of what to say.

He still couldn’t say it to him. Not even after nearly two months of marriage could he force himself to tell Sangwoo those simple three words. He looked at the familiar stairs behind Sangwoo and was luckily spared of finding a reply when Sangwoo spoke up again.

“Hey, could you fetch something in my pocket? My hands are full.”

He leaned over the table and found a small jewelry box peeking out of his pocket.

He quickly glanced at Sangwoo in surprise.

“You didn’t.”

Sangwoo grinned at him.

He opened the box to find a beautiful ring inside, silver with a beautiful sapphire stone. “If you keep this up, you’ll go bankrupt in no time.”

“It’s the one you liked that other day. I immediately ordered it...the food is delicious,” Sangwoo complimented with a big grin.

“The ring is beautiful,” he grinned back at him.

And although anyone could look at them and call them picture perfect. Gihun knew underneath it all that something wasn’t sitting right. Shiny in perfection but uncomfortable. Just the way the ring felt when he put it on.

Inho sat with Junho in his new room. Junho was extremely happy at the prospect of having his own room with Noeul. Now that he’d woken up, it wasn’t difficult to convince his mother of allowing Noeul to join him.

“By the way, that weird chauffeur has been fired,” he told Junho mindlessly. It had been something he’d immediately noticed and he thought he even knew why.

“Why do you think?” Junho was eating some sweets he’d gotten from staff members.

“Well, probably because the Grand is still suffering to get enough guests. My guess is that they can’t afford many employees at this point.” It was a blatant lie. His real guess was that Sangwoo was angry that his minion didn’t manage to get Junho killed. It took some time to realize this but when he’d seen the chauffeur enter Sangwoo’s office the day of their return and immediately leaving afterwards never to be seen again.

It was too obvious

That man was the one who’d turned the fuse back on. Maybe he was also the man hired to kill Ali the receptionist and perhaps he was even the one who’d stabbed his sister.

He was lucky that he’d left town before he himself had put two and two together.

Extremely lucky.

“Anyway, if I’d known that you would get your own room after this accident, I would’ve turned the fuse on myself,” he joked in the hopes of changing the subject before Junho starts asking him how he’s doing after a certain someone had come back.

“Hell, if I’d known that, I would’ve grabbed the nearest wire myself,” he laughed happily.

“Well you kinda did. You left the fuse turned on.” He knew he was testing Junho far too many times but he just wanted to be sure.

“Inho, how many times do I have to tell you. I closed it! I’m sure of it.” Junho looked exasperated that no one believed him.

He did believe him but he wouldn’t tell him that.

“So who did it then?” He asked casually, trying to find out what Junho thought did happen.

“Some stupid colleague must’ve not known I was switching the lightbulbs, saw the fuse down and decided to turn it back on,” he explained simply.

“Well then why did no one come forward and admit that?”

“Are you kidding?! My mother would’ve killed that person,” he laughed again. “Anyway, I would thank that person at this point.”

He smiled at Junho. He was so incredibly innocent. So foolishly kind. He resembled Gihun a lot in that prospect.

“I should thank you too hyung.” Junho looked at him with a big knowing smile. “Mom and Noeul told me about what you did when I was sick. How you refused to leave my side and mothered me in a way that rivaled my real mother,” he giggled good heartedly, looking far too happy with himself.

Inho looked at the floor, suddenly finding it interesting. “I didn’t do anything. You’re my best friend,” he confessed almost reluctantly.

Junho was still beaming at him when he looked back up. Then he folded his arms and raised a curious brow. “So how are you?”

“I’m fine,” he answered almost professionally before taking a piece of chocolate and shoving it in his mouth, hoping it will relieve him of answering any more personal, uncomfortable questions. The type of questions Junho seems to love.

“And how’s Gihunssi?” His raised brow went even higher as he looked at him pointedly.

He stopped chewing.

There it is.

It was just like Junho to put him on the spot and call him out whenever he tried to run. Just like any annoying little brother who just doesn’t know nor care that they’re crossing dangerous territory.

He’d missed Junho being annoying.

He continued chewing and frowned casually like he was completely indifferent about the topic. “He’s Mr. Seong, Mr. Cho’s husband now,” he simply shrugged.

Junho gave him a bitch face that told him that he didn’t buy the casualness.

“You still didn’t tell me everything about your honeymoon,” Junhee said as she placed his gifts to her and her baby away.

Gihun turned his back to her the moment she turned the subject on him. He decided to pour himself a cup of tea to avoid facing her.

“When I’m with Sangwoo it’s like I’m in a constant state of surprise. Amazement. He does everything to make me happy.”

And yet you never are, whispered a miserable voice in his head. No matter what it is, you’re still looking at the nearest exit or the nearest sign of the secret place. Any sign of him.

“I’d wake up everyday with a surprise waiting for me,” he smiled forcefully as he stared at the cup, his back was still turned. He was too accustomed to perfecting his constant smile even if he was sure no one would see it.

No can see him anything less than happy.

That was his role right? Nod along, look good and look happy.

Doesn’t matter whether any of it was real.

“But I-” he frowned at the cup before smiling again. “I’m a bit nervous.”

Nervous, because the bad tight feeling in his chest still hasn’t faded even after all was said and done. The regret and feeling of having done something wrong still hasn’t left him.

“That’s normal. It’s a new stage in life. You’ll get used to the change and you’ll forget all about it.” Junhee sounded calm and a bit happy to be giving him advice despite being the younger one. She was ahead of him in the marriage and pregnancy department.

His stomach churned horribly.

Pregnancy

He hoped he wouldn’t get pregnant. He even always made sure to try and clean up as though that would stop it from happening. But the good thing was that his chance of pregnancy wasn’t high outside of his heat window. That was the only saving grace.

“You think so?” He turned back to Junhee and smiled, trying not to think about it anymore.

“Yes. When you feel like your husband loves you and is ready to do anything to make you happy, you’ll relax and you’ll feel a unique kind of safety you would never feel anywhere else.”

Well how can he explain that there had been only one alpha he’d felt this safe with?

One who wasn’t his husband.

“It’s feeling even greater than love,” she finished with an odd sort of bittersweet smile on her face.

“But it isn’t love.” He wasn’t really asking because he was sure that what he and Sangwoo had wasn’t love. Still, it seemed like she took it as a question.

“It is,” she looked at the baby clothes and looked back up again looking considerably more sad than before.”I love Myunggi a lot,” she added with her smile restored.

Gihun widened his smile and looked at his cup again.

What he’d give to feel that way about his own husband…

Inho was exhausted and annoyed by the time he’d taken Mr. Park out to Kim’s pub. It wasn’t even that they had worked a lot or something. The annoying part was that Myunggi had a genius plan for saving the Grand Hotel’s reputation and for persuading people to come back after the fire.

Publicity

He’d commissioned two journalists that work for the most important newspapers in the country to make a front page cover and article about the Grand. He wouldn’t have cared at all if it weren’t for the fact that all staff members that looked ‘photogenic’ enough were required to have pictures taken of them during work. Pictures that would be featured in every newspaper across the country. He was chosen to be in a picture with none other than Mrs Kang. She sat on a chair in one of the upper balconies, looking unnecessarily over the top rich. She wore an incredibly shiny diamond necklace that covered almost all of her neck. He was stationed to stand next to her with a tray full with the finest champagne brand bottle they had. Apparently he was the most good looking among the servers.

Luckily for him, Mrs Kang didn’t speak to him or call him Daeho or anything of the sort. She was still under the impression that he was training for an acting gig and preferred not to disturb his method acting.

It was ridiculous

What wasn’t lucky for him though was that he couldn’t avoid having pictures taken of him. He had tried to avoid the camera, titling his head to the side in order to hide half his face. The camera man however didn’t allow him to do that. He kept guiding his face to look at the camera.

He knew this wasn’t good.

He couldn’t afford being on any front page covers or being featured in a newspaper. Still, it’s not like he could refuse the order and tell them he’s allergic to pictures. He’d resigned to just let the pictures get taken and hope that no one in his city would see it or that the quality wouldn’t be any good.

At the end of that exhausting week, they had picked the most appealing looking staff members to pose in one big outdoor group picture with non either than the Seongs. The Seongs sat on black velvet chairs with Sangwoo and Gihun sitting on the left side, Madame Seong sitting on the chair in middle and to her right on an identical chairs, Junhee and Myunggi. The rest of them were to form in four lines. The first line that consisted of the receptionists and concierges stood right behind the Seongs. The second line that consisted of servers like him, Junho and a couple of maids like Youngmi and Noeul stood on short wooden benches behind the first row. The third row stood on slightly higher benches and the fourth row that consisted of chefs stood on big chairs that made them stand taller.

Inho had tried to look sideways again and hoped that his face wasn’t to visible on the front page.

Ironically enough, Junho was the one standing in the center of the picture. Just two rows behind Madame Seong.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” He focused back on the speechless man in front of him. It had been nearly five minutes since he’d told him about the letter’s secret.

Telling Mr. Park the truth was something he decided to do out of numerous reasons. One, was that he needed someone to talk to about this. Someone he could trust. Second was that he found himself stuck on what to do next. How should he tell Junho? When? Third, was that he realized that he was incapable of being objective when it came to Junho.

It took him some time to really sit down and think about the fact that he’d found out the secret. He finally knew what that damned letter said. He finally knew why his sister had died and why they had feared her so much.

It was the only thing that had kept him here, hell the only thing that had kept him alive.

His mission was to find the secret, to expose it and to finally watch them suffer.

But what he had never expected or ever seen coming was that it would involve Junho.

His first friend. His best friend. His annoying little brother.

Now that it involved him, suddenly exposing them wasn’t his priority anymore, it couldn’t be. His priority is and always will be keeping Junho safe.

And he didn’t know what to do to achieve that. They have tried to get rid of him. What if they tried again? Can he ensure Junho’s safety? And would he be safer with the truth out or not? He settled on the fact that he could use an ally who was in a bit higher position.

That was why he sat here in the outdoor pub, watching a stunned Mr. Park trying to make sense of what he heard.

“So…. What you’re saying is that Ilnam and Ms. Jang were a thing?” He looked astounded.

Inho frowned. He didn’t expect that to be his first observation.

“They were married?”

“I think so...”

He became speechless again.

“What do you think I should do?”

“I knew that woman was hiding something big. I could tell from the moment I met her,” he muttered in a mix of surprise and smugness.

“Mr. Park let’s focus on Junho,” he said patiently. He understood that this a lot for the poor man.

“Junho shouldn’t know now. He can’t handle this kind of shock right now.”

He nodded and slumped back in his chair. “Yeah he’s still recovering.”

Mr. Park looked at him, eyes still wide in shock.

“Inho, you need to tell Gihunssi,” he said carefully.

Inho looked back at him, mirroring his surprise.

“He needs to know,” he repeated quietly in the silence.

Inho looked at the table and sighed. He hadn’t wanted to think about him ever since he’d read the letter.

The sad thing was, that had this happened two months ago he would’ve been the first to run to Gihun. He would’ve immediately let him know and discussed what it could all mean. He would’ve gladly listened to Gihun lose his mind and listened to him yelling in confusion before he’d eventually calm down and believe him. Now however, the gap between them had grown so wide that he wasn’t even sure whether Gihun would listen- let alone believe such an absured claim.

They weren’t on speaking terms, each is avoiding the other like fire and the imagining Gihun not believing him or even agreeing to talk him was something that had hurt him in a way he couldn’t explain.

How did they go from sharing everything as strangers to sharing nothing as lovers?

Well, they were still strangers. The only difference is that they shared common memories now.

But Park was right.

Gihun- Mr. Seong, whatever he would call him, was a fair person. A kind person unlike the rest of them. He wouldn’t let his father’s wish go to waste. He wouldn’t want Junho to be in danger. And finally, he owed it Gihun. He owed him the truth that had separated them in the first place. He had the right to know the result of his choice at the train station.

He had to tell Gihun.

The next day, he felt a big burden on his shoulders as he walked around the main hall. He didn’t want to do it but he knew he had to. It was for Junho, he kept trying to convince himself but the anxiety was growing deeper with each step closer he took to him.

How was he supposed to break this to him? How would he even react to all this? Perhaps he should’ve gotten the letter from Noeul first?

He slowed his steps when he reached his table. Luckily he was sitting alone, reading. He clenched his fist nervously and cleared his throat.

“Mr. Seong, may I have a word please?” He spoke quietly enough not to be heard by anyone else.

Gihun almost jumped in his seat from surprise.

He blinked upwards at him before looking around owlishly.

Inho sighed softly under his breath. “Sir, it’s important.”

Gihun’s wide eyes narrowed in confusion and in something else.

Concern.

He walked away quickly and headed to the secret place for the first time in weeks. He hadn’t dared go there after they’d returned from their honeymoon. Why should he dwell on something of the past when Gihun clearly looked happy in his new marriage.

That’s a lie and you know it, said a small voice in his head. He may look happy but you know better than to believe the faulty smile he gives to everyone.

He shook his head and tried to clear his mind. This wasn’t the time to think about this.

Junho mattered more than any of that.

Inho stood in front of the bench and looked around the place he’s sorely missed. It had been so long since he’d been here and even longer since he’d shared this space with Gihun.

He heard faint sounds of footsteps and turned around to see Gihun walking down the stairs with a frown on his face.

Did he also feel weird being here with him again?

“So?” He said with an indifferent cool voice as came to a stop in front of him.

He took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry for asking to talk to you here, but it’s important and no one else can hear about it.” He was dragging this on, he knew it. Hell, he wasn’t even looking at Gihun.

He couldn’t.

“Yeah I noticed that it must be important. That’s why I decided to come here and talk to you alone.” Gihun turned to face him, still looking concerned and yet determined to keep a distance.

Inho would’ve been struck by the implication that Gihun only agreed to talk to him because it was a serious matter, but because it concerned Junho’s wellbeing and because he knew the worst was still yet to come, he ignored the hollow pain.

Gihun looked away as if he regretted his words but then clasped his hands together nervously and tried looked back just an ounce kinder than before. “Can you please tell me quickly. I’ll need to go back soon.”

Inho ignored the fact that Gihun felt uncomfortable being with him in the secret place.

“I found the letter,” he frowned as he said it.

“What letter?” Gihun frowned back, still looking calm. He hadn’t realized it yet.

“The one Saebyeok had found and hid.”

Gihun finally got it. He looked at the river to his right and started smiling in a twisted way that didn’t suit his innocent face. Like he wanted to smirk and sneer at the same time.

Gihun huffed breathlessly without a trace of humour and looked back at him but he didn’t say a word.

“Kang Noeul has it now. I don’t know how she found it but I managed to read it.”

Gihun’s twisted smile faded. “Junho’s wife?” He asked calmly.

Inho nodded.

Gihun’s smile returned only it wasn’t just twisted with bitterness and resentment. It was like he was smiling wistfully. Like the price of the letter had come at his expense.

“And what is the great secret that did all this to us?” He smiled wider in irony, hiding any trace of concern or seriousness that Inho even wondered whether he really even believed him.

Inho also had to ignore the double meaning of his words.

It had done a lot of damage to many people.

But Inho knew that Gihun meant only them by saying ‘us’.

He took a deep breath and prepared himself mentally.

“The letter is in your father’s handwriting.” Before he could continue, Gihun interrupted. “My father?” He repeated. His smile had now dropped and was replaced with a casual faint frown.

He nodded. “He wrote a will. A declaration of sorts.”

“Declaring what?” Gihun asked calmly, too calmly without missing a beat.

Inho decided that he can’t do this after all.

Gihun won’t believe him.

He doesn’t trust him anymore.

How could he ever tell him. ‘Oh you know, your father just had another kid. And you already know him! And his mother too!’

It sounded ridiculous.

This was a bad idea.

“I’ll get you the letter and you can read it yourself. That way we can be sure of the handwriting,” he said quickly almost turning to walk to the stairs.

“Didn’t you read it?” Gihun looked at him in confusion and he had to stop the step his foot had taken.

“I did.”

“Then you know what it says. What did he write?” Gihun was looking as though he didn’t understand why Inho just wouldn’t tell him despite having read it.

Inho looked at the ground beneath them, closing his eyes for a second too long.

“He declared that Junho- is his biological son and that he is the owner of the Grand Hotel. He wrote that Junho is to inherit his share of 50% of the Grand’s ownership because of his alpha status and that the surname Hwang is a fake one.”

He looked at Gihun and saw him frozen for just a second.

“Junho? Ms. Jang Geumja’s son.”

“Yes.”

“My father wrote a letter saying that Junho is his son.”

He nodded.

“So he’s my brother? And Junhee’s brother?”

He nodded again.

Gihun nodded with him. “And what, Ms. Jang’s our mother too?”

Oh no, he thought as he decided to remain quiet.

“And my mother is my step mother then,” he said louder, tilting his head. Still looking serious.

“And Sangwoo is a mob leader,” he spoke even louder, putting his hands on his hips.

“And Myunggi is a spy,” he continued with the anger filling his voice.

“And you…you are secret detective,” he finished, smiling sarcastically.

He took another deep breath. “I wanted to bring you the letter and let you read it yourself because I knew this would happen.” He was speaking more to himself than to Gihun.

Mr. Park shouldn’t have convinced him.

Gihun raised his eyebrows mockingly and his disbelieving smile returned. “I don’t want to read it,” he said shaking his head simply. “And I won’t believe it. Because if I did, then I’d be crazy. And if you believe it then you’re crazy.”

Inho looked at the ground again.

“Or you made up this stupid shit to get me here and get me caught up in your delusions.”

Inho looked back up at him and frowned.

He knew that this would happen, knew that Gihun wouldn’t believe him, would be in denial. He didn’t know why he didn’t expect Gihun to accuse him of lying.

“I told you-”

“You’re a liar!” Gihun’s voice was loud. Cold. Convinced of what he was saying.

“Or crazy,” he added to his insults. “And I’m not willing to fall for this hoax and believe your lies!”

“I’m not a liar,” he said quietly. “I told you before that Saebyeok had said that whatever was in that letter, threatened the ownership of the Grand.” He was growing angry himself.

The resentment was building up inside him like a tidal wave and making him speak louder himself.

“If you don’t believe that, then go and ask Junho-that is if you still trust him- ask him whether he turned off the fuse the night of his accident and he will swear on his life that he had. But someone else had turned it back on.” He didn’t know why he revealed that conspiracy theory that he knew deep down to be true. He probably felt like it was damning evidence that someone was after Junho.

He hoped it could convince Gihun that at least something wasn’t right.

“And who did that?” Gihun interrupted him again with his sarcastic smile. “Let me guess? Sangwoo right? Cause he has elastic hands that can reach the hotel all the way from Europe right?” He was yelling now, not holding back at all. “You are CRAZY. Seek HELP.”

Inho felt a part of him shut down the instant Gihun had said that.

“Fine,” he said coldly, sparing Gihun one final blank glance before walking away without another look back.

Gihun had finally broken something between them too. Something that had been fragile when he’d first arrived to the Grand. Something he’d only learned to grow because of how Junho and Gihun had stood beside him.

The willingness to trust others.

Gihun hadn’t always believed him but it was never like this. Hadn’t been this cruel and blind before. He knew that Gihun was in shock but he didn’t care.

Gihun had hurt him yet again.

He’d hurt him by marrying Sangwoo and now he hurt him by not believing him. By thinking the worst of him.

Did Gihun think that he was like Sangwoo? Then again he married Sangwoo so maybe he didn’t care.

Were they that broken that Gihun didn’t even have a bit of trust left for him?

He didn’t know and he didn’t want to know. If Gihun is willing to think that he is a crazy liar then so be it.

He’d thought he could still count on Gihun as a trustful person who would still be fair and objective.

He was wrong.

A week passed and Gihun was right back at the place he’d escaped from. He got out of the car with Sangwoo and entered the hotel. He’d been gone with Sangwoo in an effort to escape his thoughts and everything that had happened that day. But of course, it had all been in vain.

After Inho had left him standing in the secret place, he knew he’d crossed a line. He had been cruel and unwilling to even hear him out. Later that day he’d regretted it but couldn’t say a word because he felt like if he did admit to having been cruel then he’d be admitting that everything else had been real and he couldn’t do that. He couldn’t wrap his head around what Inho had said.

It was madness.

Gihun had walked back to hotel and had agreed instantly when Sangwoo asked him if he wanted to leave town for a couple of days.

He needed to get out of this place and think.

Those days only helped him calm down but otherwise it hadn’t been of much help. He still couldn’t believe that he had a brother.

Junho.

He couldn’t believe that Geumja would’ve hid all of this from him. How could she do that?

How was any of this possible?

He found himself craving to talk to Inho about it but that’s when he’d realize that Inho wasn’t there and that he himself had left town. It was his fault that he’d skipped out of town.

His fault for hurting Inho like that.

When five days had passed, he’d been the one to tell Sangwoo that he wished to return to the hotel because as it turns out, being away from the madness didn’t stop it from accompanying him.

And if he were honest, he’d admit that there was a much bigger reason for his return.

He missed Inho.

He feels horrible for how he acted that day and from that moment on, he had continued to feel like a terrible human.

Inho wasn’t a liar.

He never had been a liar since the moment he’d said his real name. It was one of the many things that had set him apart from everyone else. One of the many things he loved about him…

And Inho wasn’t crazy either.

He hadn’t meant it. When the anger and denial had ebbed away, he knew that Inho couldn’t be misunderstanding such an important matter.

Funny how he’d spent over a month without seeing Inho and had lived, but now found it unbearable to not see him after merely a few days.

It was his guilt and shame leading him.

And something else he hadn’t wanted to admit to himself.

Longing…

Underneath all of the crazy unbelievable things, he’d simply missed being with Inho at the secret place. Missed discussing everything together like they were amateur detectives. He missed having someone to talk to about every insane little thing they’d find out. He longed for the feeling of being with the only person he didn’t have to act happy in front of.

He listened to Sangwoo mentioning that the booking list was finally growing long again before watching Sangwoo walk away to Myunggi’s office. The moment he was out of sight, he started looking around for the familiar face he wanted to see.

There. He spotted Inho carrying a tray with two wine filled glasses and heading to a table in the back of the main hall, completely unaware of his presence.

His pulse started getting quicker.

Gihun cleared his throat with slightly wide eyes. “Youngil?” He called out loud enough for Inho to turn his head from the table. He almost winced at his own hopeful tone.

Inho barely blinked and turned away again.

Gihun couldn’t breathe.

Was Inho ignoring him?

Wouldn’t he want to talk to him at all?

Had he been that cruel?

His heart panged with pain but before anything else could happen, he saw Inho placing the second glass on the table before turning back to him and walking in his direction.

Gihun could breathe again.

However, Inho didn’t walk nearly close enough. He stopped with a good distance between them and Gihun knew it wasn’t just out of formality.

He’d hurt Inho.

“Welcome back sir,” he said in an utmost polite tone that made Gihun want to rip out his own hair.

“Thank you,” he smiled regardless, somehow glad that Inho was talking at all. Even though he kind of had to talk to him in public.

“How is Junho?” He asked, still smiling. Somehow he was relishing the fact that they were even talking at all.

Inho eyes softened just a little bit at the mention of Junho. “He’s good. The doctor removed the cast and bandages yesterday.” His tone was warmer when he talked about Junho.

Gihun would start to envy his supposed brother soon.

“Great.”

Silence.

They just stared at each other. He knew he looked nervous but that was the case only because Inho looked extremely indifferent to his existence.

“Well uh- follow me. I need your help,” he said as he tried to look and sound indifferent himself.

Inho didn’t give any indication of wanting to to follow him. Sure, his legs had moved and he’d begun walking after him but he looked like if it were up to him, he wouldn’t have wanted to go.

Gihun waited for Inho to go to the secret place first before hurrying up after him. Inho was standing at the lowest floor, right in front of the river. He was smoking and not staring at him.

Gihun jumped and walked to him, looking anxious.

“I want to see the letter,” he said hesitantly.

“Told you Noeul has it,” he said devoid of any emotion. Still not looking at him.

He paused and swallowed nervously. “So you read it yourself?” He asked almost desperately. It was a stupid question, he knew that, but it was one his naïve heart still needed to ask.

Inho finally looked at him.

“I already told you that I did… or do you still think I’m a liar and that I’m making this up?” Inho’s blank look was worse than any look of anger he’d gotten.

Inho rarely gets angry with him. What happens is worse. He gets disappointed.

“Can you imagine how I felt after that day? I jumped on the opportunity to leave town when Sangwoo suggested it.”

“Hope you had fun sir,” Inho said bitterly.

Gihun narrowed his eyes at him but didn’t argue about that. “I needed time to think. Even though I still don’t believe that this is true I- I just can’t find a reason why you’d lie to me,” he shrugged his shoulders helplessly.

“Thank you sir, I’m flattered,” he retorted sarcastically. Still looking cold as ice.

“Inho, this isn’t the time for this sir crap. Let’s focus on this mess,” he pleaded quietly. It made him uncomfortable whenever Inho called him that. He hated that it had become Inho’s instinct to call him sir. Even when they were alone.

Then he remembered the very day he’d told him not to call him by his name.

It was your own wish, remember? He blinked that voice away and focused back on Inho.

“I’ll get you the letter. But until then, I hope that you’ll believe what I say,” he said with a lesser amount of bitterness in his tone.

Gihun sighed and felt some of the tension release from his body. “I feel like I’m going crazy Inho. I wish you hadn’t told me…” a part of this was a lie. Because deep down, despite everything, he felt a small sense of happiness return to him. One he thought he’d lost after his wedding.

“I thought a lot about whether to let you know…but this secret was too much even for me,” Inho replied, looking slightly melancholic.

Gihun realized that it must’ve been because of Saebyeok. Because not too long ago, she’d also known that very secret all on her own. She’d carried it as a weapon she could use. Inho however, looked like he was carrying it like a ticking time bomb that might end up hurting Junho.

He resisted moving his hand to hold Inho’s. The instinct felt old and new all at once. Like something he’d always wanted to do and something he’d longed to remember but something that he thought was no longer possible.

“I was too worried about Junho. That’s why I told you,” he added quietly.

“Keep an eye on him. Don’t leave him alone,” he found himself saying suddenly like he believed him.

He did.