Archive of Our Own ^beta

Even before all of this, Logan had always felt the most alive when he was fighting.

Adrenaline pumping, muscles working, brain on high alert. He knew he was built for it, and there was pleasure to be had in doing what his body was made for. Violence had been his sole outlet for so long that it sometimes felt like it was his purpose in life. He was a machine, a soldier, a tool, and a damn good one at that. Knowing that had filled him with pride once.

After meeting the X-Men, after watching them burn, after his killing spree and the destruction of mutant-kind's reputation, that pride was gone. Logan was nothing but a sack of meat and bones and metal, unable to die and unable to live. He drifted through the world like a ghost, unwelcome everywhere he went, any aggression he once had snuffed out like it had never been. He couldn't die, but he was dead in all the ways that counted, just a shell of his former self.

Then Wade Wilson found him. And just like that, everything changed.

Fighting again felt like brushing off a layer of old skin – dead and numb and devoid of feeling – and embracing the animal underneath, scrubbed pink and raw and full of rage. Logan couldn't think, could only be, and that was such a fucking relief that he was high on it, spurred on by the sight of blood on his claws and tender flesh under his hands. And even after Wade won him over, it was exhilarating to be working towards a goal for the first time in decades instead of wandering aimlessly, only ever in search of the next bottle. Logan hadn't had a purpose in what felt like a lifetime.

Which was why finding out that it was all bullshit hit that much harder.

Logan thought he'd stopped being stupid enough to hope. And now here he was, disappointed and betrayed, all because this jabbering little cunt had led him along like a dog on a leash.

The punch in the face was the last straw.

Logan could barely see through the red haze of rage as he pummeled Wade right through the passenger seat, claws first, digging up blood and viscera with every stab. Wade gave as good as he got, and the pain only spurred Logan on to hurt him more, keep the fucker down, make him pay.

Their breathing was so fucking loud in the cramped car, every sound of pain and effort amplified like the ringing of a church bell. The air stunk of sweat and blood, and Logan felt a sick satisfaction at every agonized noise he managed to tear out of Wade.

There was something really fucking wrong with him, because when Wade stabbed his katanas through Logan's lungs and twisted, tearing muscle and scraping bone until blood bubbled up in Logan's throat, he laughed, like a lunatic, and returned the favor with vicious glee.

He was still angry, he was fucking fuming, but he was also having fun, which – yeah. It had been a long fucking time since he'd felt anything like that.

Wade seemed to be just as enthusiastic as him to keep going, and Logan lost himself to the rhythm of it, blow after blow, slicing and tearing and stabbing. He was quickly adjusting to the way Wade moved, learning his tricks and how to counter them. Logan couldn't even lie – it was exhilarating, the freedom to funnel all of his rage, his urge to maim, into a person and knowing that they could take it. That they wouldn't hesitate to hurt him right back.

He was so lost in it that it took him a while to notice that the quality of Wade's breathing had changed, coming even more raspy and desperate than before. And even when he did, it still wasn't immediately obvious to him what the reason for that was.

That was until he had Wade pressed back into a car seat, both sets of claws plunged through his shoulders at once – and the fucker moaned.

Logan paused just long enough for Wade to stab two of his little knives into Logan's sides and topple him over, reversing their positions. Wade didn't even bother hiding how hard he was, as if he already knew that Logan had caught on. Logan couldn't stop staring at the bulge in Wade's pants, torn between renewed fury and a feeling he couldn't quite place at the thought that Wade was getting off on all of this.

“Yes, I'm very happy to see you,” Wade said, and Logan growled, kicking him across the car so that Wade hit his head on the opposite window, sprawling out across the back seat. Logan followed him, pinning Wade's legs down by kneeling on his thighs, making sure to dig his adamantium knee caps painfully into Wade's femur. Wade groaned, looking up at him with a mixture of surprise and lust. “Holy fuck. Is this happening? By the power of Madonna, please nobody wake me up –”

Logan stabbed him again, making sure to get the aorta through his hip for a nice spray of blood. Wade sucked in a breath, and in his pants, Logan could see his dick twitch. It was at once repulsive and impressive.

When Wade tried to reach for Logan's cock, Logan rammed his claws through his wrist, pinning it to the seat below.

“Fuck!” Wade shouted, wriggling his fingers like he was trying to make sure they still worked. “Ow. A 'no' would've been fine, honey badger. Violence is never the answer.”

“You don't get to touch,” Logan growled, watching as a shiver traveled through Wade's body like a wave. “I'm not into that shit.”

“Okay, yeah, I'm all about that consent, so no touchy-touch, got it.” Wade twisted his wrist, eyes fluttering when he tore it open all over again on Logan's claws. Logan sneered at him.

“You sick freak.”

“You really need to stop bullying me if you don't want me to get off on it,” Wade said, not even having the decency to sound embarrassed by how depraved that was. “Sorry not sorry, honey badger. I've got very specific tastes. And humiliation is a four course meal.”

Logan had figured as much. “Shameless.”

“That's my dragon fursona.”

“You're a fucking disgrace.” He could tell the words hit home, though not in the way he'd intended. Wade sucked in a breath, looking at Logan through the mask, and Logan had no idea what it was, but he couldn't stand the sight of those impersonal, white eyes anymore. He reached down to rip Wade's mask clean off his head, tossing it towards the back of the car as Wade blinked up at him, clearly startled. “You can't hide it from me,” he said, and Wade's eyes slipped halfway shut as his head thunked back against the window.

“Wasn't trying to, honey bunch. Gotta say though, this is kind of sending mixed signals if you really don't want a ticket to the bone zone –“

Logan stabbed him in the throat. Wade choked on his own blood for a second, and Logan watched as Wade's hips kicked up into the air, his eyes rolling shut at the sensation. There was something tingling at the base of Logan's spine – not arousal, because that never happened in the presence of other people – but something else. A sense of power. Superiority, maybe.

He was turning Wade on without even trying. And there was something very satisfying about watching Wade humiliate himself for the pain that Logan was giving him.

“This really isn't doing shit for you, is it?” Wade gargled around Logan's claws, looking down at Logan's crotch. “Or is that fabric extra stiff? Is there a jockstrap in there?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Logan growled, plunging his other set of claws through Wade's ribs. The whine he got in return was weirdly satisfying.

“No, it's just – I thought all Logans were sex fiends, I mean, that just makes sense, right? And there's this fan theory that you can feel with your claws, so this much penetration has to be –“

“Sex doesn't do shit for me,” Logan cut in, because he'd never been embarrassed by that fact. Watching other people make complete asses of themselves in the pursuit of it had rather done the opposite – Logan was glad that he wasn't such a slave to his libido. At least he didn't have to deal with that on top of his other animal impulses.

“Oh shit, we've got an ace in the hole! That's cool, that's – Aw, fuck,” Wade whined, tossing his head back when Logan gathered Wade's wrists in his hand before he stabbed through both of them with one set of claws, pinning them to the headrest. With Wade unable to move, Logan was free to run his other blades down Wade's chest and stomach, slowly tearing three neat gashes of blood red into his skin that healed almost as quickly as the appeared. Then he did it again, digging a little deeper this time until Wade gasped, shivering when Logan probably punctured something vital.

“Fuck,” Wade spat, his eyes going wide as he looked down at Logan's claws. “Uh – okay, seriously, if you don't want me to cream my pants in the next five minutes, you're gonna have to stop that shit.”

“That's fucking pathetic,” Logan said, watching as Wade's eyelids fluttered at his words. “A bit of stabbing and you start thinking with your dick like a brainless, little whore. You're disgusting.”

Wade whined, squirming on the seat like he was trying to somehow get friction on his cock, despite the fact that Logan still had his wrists speared to the headrest. “Ah, shit. I'm so fucking serious, you're going to make me come if you don't stop.”

“Oh, really?” Logan asked in a mocking drawl. “Fucking pain slut.”

Wade sucked in a breath, his eyes snapping wide. “Oh my god. Are you actually not into this? Like, at all? Cause it feels like you kind of want me to come, and if you don't, you're making it very hard for me not to, which is not a pun I wanted to make, but when in Rome –“

Logan stabbed Wade through the stomach, only inches away from his dick, and Wade yowled, his feet scrabbling against the floor of the car to try and push his body further onto Logan's claws. When Logan pulled away, he didn't let his claws leave Wade's body entirely before he pushed them back in, slow and steady this time. Wade made a sound that was halfway torn between a moan and a yelp, lust and desperation written all over his face.

“Oh –“ He shivered from head to toe, his hips jerking up in a stuttering motion. “Shit. Can I have my hands back, please? I won't touch you, I promise, I'll just –”

“No,” Logan said, demonstratively pinning Wade's wrists even harder against the headrest. “Now quit begging and shut up.”

“Those both technically mean the same thing, so it's a little redundant to –“ A full half-turn of the claws in Wade's stomach melted Wade's complaint into a strangled gasp that tickled something primal in Logan's brain. Like his inner predator sensing a weakness.

Ready to pounce.

“You're were right earlier, this isn't doing shit for me,” Logan said, his voice as even as he could make it, and Wade gasped, humping up into nothing as Logan slowly twisted his claws again. “And you're getting off on it anyway, you selfish cunt. Just can't help yourself, can you?”

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” Wade babbled, tossing his head from side to side and scrabbling at the headrest with his shredded, useless hands. “Thank fuck you aren't sex repulsed, holy shit, this is the best day of my life –“

Logan shut him up by pulling his claws out and stabbing Wade several times in rapid succession. Blood splashed across the upholstery, the floor, the ceiling. Some of it hit Logan straight in the face, and he darted his tongue out to taste it, rumbling deep in his chest at the thrill of making a kill.

Except his prey wasn't dead. It was writhing underneath him like a beached fish, letting out a stream of obscenities as the smell of pain and arousal filled the air. Logan kept going until that frenzied urge to maim simmered down somewhat, sitting back on his haunches and pulling both sets of claws out of Wade's body.

For a blissful moment, Wade kept his mouth shut. He just lay there, panting and bloodied, his cock an obscene bulge straining against the inside of his suit, throbbing like it had its own heartbeat. Logan wiped his face with one of his sleeves, sitting back on his haunches. Aside from breathing a little harder than normal, he was perfectly still.

The contrast between them was massive. Logan calm and composed, Wade looking about three seconds away from losing his mind. Logan couldn't claim to be aroused by any of it. But it sure as hell was giving him something.

He felt like he was winning. Like he was better than Wade. And god fucking damn it, Logan wanted to at least be better than Wade.

“Had enough yet, mouth?” he sneered, and Wade's eyes slipped open to half-mast, fixing on him with a look that reeked of desperation. It made him look vulnerable. Open. Weak, the animal in Logan laughed mockingly. Like a bitch in heat. Unlike me.

“Why'd you stop?” Wade asked in between panting breaths, only seeming to realize now that his hands were free. He instantly reached down to grab his cock – and Logan was on him in a flash, pressing him back into the seat with his full weight across Wade's thighs, knocking Wade's arms away and sticking his claws in on either side of Wade's ribcage.

“I said no touching,” Logan growled, and Wade shook his head frantically but reached up to grab hold of the headrest instead, his biceps trembling.

“Please, I can't. I'm so close, I need to fucking come –“

“You said you were going to cream your pants if I did this.” Logan raked both sets of claws down Wade's chest like an animal, and Wade arched up into the pain, throwing his head back with an enraptured look on his face. “Are you a fucking liar, bub?”

“No, no, no, please, just keep –“ Cutting off Wade's chatter with a well-placed stab was quickly becoming Logan's new favorite hobby. He kept going, stabbing Wade right through the pelvis, then moving further inwards to skewer the stretch of skin where his happy trail would be if he had hair. Logan couldn't see it through the suit, but the thought of pushing his claws right through Wade's belly button was a little funny, so he made an educated guess and stabbed Wade right through the stomach.

Wade seemed to be beyond speech at this point, which was such a novel experience that Logan decided to reward him, knocking Wade's thighs apart with his knees so he could slash his claws right through Wade's inner thighs, narrowly avoiding the outline of his cock down the right side of his leg. It seemed to be enough for Wade, who yelped high in his throat, his fingers digging into the headrest as he started humping the air, unimpeded now that Logan's weight wasn't pinning him down, jostling Logan's claws with every motion.

“Oh my – oh, god, fuck,” Wade snarled right before he froze in a rictus of agonized pleasure – that quickly turned into open-mouthed groaning as his chest heaved and his dick throbbed, obviously coming in his pants.

The bastard actually did it. Lost his shit just like that.

The triumph that Logan felt was its own rush, a glowing sense of derisive pride at the fact that he'd made Wade beg like a little bitch for his claws. No matter what happened now, Wade would always know that Logan had held this power over him once.

Watch the little fuck square up to him now.

“You're a fucking pig,” Logan growled, and Wade gave a hitching moan, still grinding up into nothing as he twitched through the tail end of his orgasm.

“Fuck,” he gurgled. “Oh lord, have mercy, I just came, I can't do it again –“

“Can't you?” Logan twisted his wrists, and Wade arched up into the blades with a strangled gasp, trembling like a leaf. “Yeah, I fucking knew it. Sluts like you can always get it up again.”

“Oh my god,” Wade whimpered, his voice high and reedy as he writhed on Logan's claws. “Twist them again, twist the– ungh!”

Logan watched with a sick sort of satisfaction as Wade's body convulsed, arching into the pain as he presumably came again. Or maybe he was still coming, it was hard to tell for sure.

Either way, Logan decided he'd made his point. He pulled his claws out of Wade in one, quick motion, ignoring the strangled noise he got in response as he wiped his claws off on Wade's thighs before he drew them back into his knuckles.

“Grab your shit. We're leaving,” Logan said, and Wade – laughed.

He fucking laughed.

“Oh, are we?” he asked in a clear echo of Logan's words from earlier, right before their fight. The sarcasm grated on Logan's ears like nails on a chalkboard. “Look around you, shnookums. We wrecked this baby like a virgin on prom night. No way are we getting anywhere in this piece of shit now.”

“The fuck you know about cars?” Logan growled, and Wade sighed loudly, sprawling out in his seat and patting his stomach with a smug smirk.

“More than you, probably. Anyway, thanks for the freebie, sugartits. Not that I wouldn't have returned the favor, but you know, I never look a gift horse in the mouth. Or a gift Wolverine.” He grabbed his mask off the backseat, tugged it back on and blew Logan a kiss. “Hit me up for round two anytime.”

With an enraged snarl, Logan launched himself across the car, bashing Wade's head straight through the window and reaching for the seatbelt to strangle him. Without any of his knives to defend himself, it was easy enough to get Wade tied to the seat, wrapped up like a Christmas turkey until he couldn't move a muscle.

“This is pretty kinky,” Wade said, and Logan knew even without seeing it that he was waggling his eyebrows under the mask. “Just say the word if you want an encore, I'd be happy to –“

Logan punched him in the head at full force, finally knocking the fucker out cold. In the ensuing silence, he crawled back into the front seat, testing the ignition and nodding to himself when the motor still sputtered to life, as expected. Knew more about cars, his ass.

Still, night had fallen in the time since they'd started to fight, and for all its increased healing, his body hadn't found a way to negate the effects of sleep deprivation yet. So Logan decided to hunker down on the opposite side of the center console and get some shut eye too. He deserved it after the day he'd just had.

Though he had a feeling that things were only going to go downhill from here.