Chapter Text
Lucanis hadn’t slept so little since he and Spite were at a disagreement during their time in the Lighthouse. 1am was fine, 2am was pushing it but 3? 3 was beyond repair. He found himself doing laps of the house with a baby in his arms for the fourth time in six days. He’d constantly let Isseya sleep much to her chagrin but it hadn’t been long since he’d watched her nearly bleed to death bringing the baby in his arms into the world. He turned on one of the wall lanterns in the kitchen and started his new routine of one handed coffee making.
“You are lucky you’re so cute, Ela. I should not be doing this at this time of the morning.”
Lucanis could probably make his cup of coffee blindfolded at this point in his life, he’d been doing it for so long. Elaris crinkled her face up on his shoulder and yawned slowly, finally nodding back off to sleep. Her mouth was open slightly as she breathed deeply against Lucanis’ chest bundled up in the blanket he’d knitted her a few months prior.
“Don’t tell your mamma but I don’t think I love anyone more than I love you, mi preciosa.”
He poured his coffee into his favourite cup and took it through to the rear sitting room and lay on the sofa he knew was the comfiest, usually taken by Caterina throughout the day. He kept the lights off in case he did drift off himself and the only ambience came from outside the large windows behind him. Stars littered the sky and the moon shone bright above Treviso, illuminating everything in a soft silver glow. He looked down at the sleeping baby on his bare chest and felt his heart swell, almost as if it would burst. She was finally peaceful and looked the almost spitting image of her mother. He carefully sipped his coffee leaning away from her head and replaced his hand on her back.
“Little man needs. To sleep. Spite will watch. Tiny moon.”
“I cannot sleep, it’s both too early and too late for me to try.”
“Let Spite. Help.”
Before Lucanis knew what was happening, Spite had pressed his hands gently over his eyes sending him straight to sleep. Long gone had the days of the Spirit keeping him awake for fear of waking up in a strange location and long gone had the stress of him being restless constantly. Spite stepped back out and smiled at his handiwork of Lucanis snoring gently with one hand on his baby. He’d have taken the opportunity to go and check on his Rook but he’d told Lucanis he’d watch over Elaris so that is exactly what he’d do. He paced around the sofa for a bit, counted the stars out the window, sat taking in the features of the newborn that he could see and spent a good bit of time sniffing the cooling coffee on the table.
The clock ticked by further and further till finally 6am hit and the house started to wake up. Spite had long succumbed to sleep himself by the time Illario walked into the room, a purple glow resting around Lucanis’ body as the three of them continued their slumber.
“Look at you three, sleeping so soundly you wouldn’t know you woke us up twice. I guess I’ll go fetch Iss.”
Illario climbed the stairs with a softness he’d never lost since sneaking around as a boy. He knew every secret of the house and every way to avoid Caterina like it was a game of cat and mouse. Isseya and Lucanis’ room spanned most of the third floor and had at least three secret routes to it so Illario took the one Lucanis didn’t even know. It was early enough to be sneaking around, sending a thrill down his veins for the first time in a long time. He quietly pressed the mechanism on the inside of the corridor and released himself directly opposite the bedroom door.
“Iss? It’s me. Are you awake?” He knocked on the door softly and waited for a response.
“Come in Illario, I’m dressed.”
He poked his head round the door and smiled as she turned around to greet him properly.
“I assume you’ve come to tell me where my child is? She’s not where I left her.”
“She sleeps soundly on her fathers chest downstairs.”
“I know, I felt him get up before I could attempt it when she started fussing a few hours ago.”
“You are a very lucky woman to have his entire devotion.”
“I don’t think it’s entirely mine anymore.”
“No, probably not. Would you like a cup of coffee?”
“I’d kill for a good cup of coffee right now but as I’m breastfeeding, I can’t.”
“Still? Such a tragedy. I’ll have two cups on your behalf.”
Isseya rolled her eyes and followed Illario downstairs to the living room Lucanis still slept in. The sight of their tiny baby on her fathers bare chest made her heart soar as she closed the gap to the sofa. She knew he was never fully asleep in moments like that but made sure to be quiet anyway. Lifting Elaris carefully away from him, she settled on a chair to feed her. Lucanis stirred as expected but made no effort to see the reason behind the sudden weightlessness on his chest.
“I hope you’ve been behaving for your papa, little moon.”
“She can do no wrong ever, she is my princess.”
“I knew you weren’t asleep.”
“I have slept lightly since I was three years old. I’m not going to change now.”
“Maybe that’s why I’m such a bad Crow, I could sleep for Antiva.”
“Do you want to continue to be a Crow?”
“I… was going to speak to you about this. I don’t think I do.”
Lucanis sat up and stretched before offering to take Elaris back once she’d finished feeding so Isseya could sort herself out. He instantly started winding her and bouncing her gently to get her back to sleep. Fatherhood had come naturally to him much to his surprise and six days in he was starting to enjoy the routine it had put him in.
“I’m not going to be upset if you retire, Iss. If anything, I understand. I know it won’t be just Elaris fuelling your decision.”
“It’s not her at all. I think I am really done with fighting and death. Defeating the Gods feels like an age ago already and I saw so much sadness and destruction that I think it would fill two lifetimes. We have our little one now, sure, but I really think being a Crow is in my past.”
“I respect that, amore. I’ll sort the paperwork to retire you from active contract work.”
“Oh I’ll still do all of our paperwork and contract sorting, I just can’t bring myself to do the rest of it.”
“It will be sorted, do not worry. I don’t know a single Talon or House that would argue with your decision, amor.”
“You know I’ve been thinking about this, don’t you?”
“I heard you talking to Teia the other day. Viago already told me he’d start thinking of excuses to not get you any work again.”
“I don’t deserve you sometimes…”
Elaris interrupted the moment in true newborn fashion by bringing her breakfast up down Lucanis’ bare back. He stopped his pacing and bouncing and stared at Isseya who did her damn hardest not to laugh. He passed her the baby with a heavy sigh and went off towards their bedroom with a string of Antivan curses under his breath. Viago swept past him with a grimace on his face and promptly stole his niece from her mother.
“Oh there she is, my favourite de Riva.”
“Aw thanks, you’re so cute.”
“I didn’t mean you.”
“I know.”
He laughed and ruffled his sisters hair, taking Elaris outside to look at the late blooming flowers in the Villa gardens. The sun was already warming the whole of Treviso with a golden glow and it was shaping up to be a hot day once again. Viago named every plant he could identify to his niece, as he once did for his own daughter for sleep purposes. He knew she had no idea what he was on about nor did he care. He needed both babies in his life like his lungs needed air.
“You know, Lucanis only realised I’m ginger when she came out.”
“You never told him? I assumed he knew.”
“I’ve been purple for so long I’d almost forgotten myself. I can’t believe how good you are with babies.”
“I was five when you entered my life, I don’t remember you not in it.”
“Lucanis is letting me retire from contract work…”
“Oh good! I already took you off my active Crow list for maternity reasons but I’ll just leave you off it. Maybe you can oversee the reform of training and recruitment you’ve always wanted to bring in.”
“I didn’t even think of that, I guess there’s actually a lot I could do behind the scenes.”
“Sorellina there is so much more to the Crows than assassinating people. You already do a fantastic job at some of it and now you have the opportunity to do even more. Don’t think of motherhood as a restriction, think of it as a blessing.”
“I already do.”
*****
Weeks went by and Lucanis had gotten used to his new routine of dropping absolutely everything at the sound of a high pitched cry. Spite had even come to sense it before it happened and often dragged his host away from whatever task he was doing to see to the baby. The whole house had fallen into almost a military like state around whatever needs Elaris had and when. She had already began to grow and started to fill out her clothes a lot more, her features were decidedly more Antivan and the purple ring around her dark eyes more prominent. Isseya and Lucanis pretty much danced around one another throughout the day now and Caterina loved watching them get used to parenthood together.
“Lucanis, my boy, why don’t you bring me Elaris for a bit? You two look like you could use some rest.”
“Oh, no. We’re fine thank you.”
“Let me rephrase it, bring Elaris here and go and get some rest. Te ves como una Mierda.”
“Che cosa!? Nonna you can’t tell me that… fine.”
Lucanis passed the baby across to Caterina and ran a hand through his hair. It wasn’t that he thought his grandmother incapable of keeping an eye on her for a few hours, he’d just gotten so used to having her in his arms that it felt strange when she wasn’t there. He stood staring at the oldest Dellamorte holding the youngest one with a lump in his throat.
“It hurts her. But she. Does it. for you. Lost so. Much.”
“I know, Spite. Me too…”
“Gave life to. Five. now has. None. She loves you. Can’t say it. thinks it makes. Her. Weak.”
“I don’t need her to tell me, I see it in the way she has changed. Elaris will only know a Grandmother who loves her and that is enough for me.”
“Caterina is. A strong. Woman. But only as. Strong as. Her family. You and Rook. And Ponytail. Make her. Happy.”
“You don’t have a nickname for her? You truly surprise me.”
“Spite does not dare.”
Lucanis struggled to contain the laugh that left his mouth and Caterina shooed him out of the room to go and rest. He took a detour via the kitchens to pile a tray with snacks and most importantly, coffee. The smell alone almost brought him back to his senses as he mindfully made his way to the floor that housed his wife. The late morning sun greeted him as he quietly opened the door and sat on her side of the bed. She was fast asleep sprawled across the whole bed at the lack of a body on his side. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and was met with a punch to the side of the head.
“… ow.”
“Luc!? Makers breath I thought someone had broken in! I’m sorry…”
“You pack a solid punch for a retired lady. I didn’t mean to disturb your sleep but Caterina has Elaris and she sent me up here to rest.”
“Can I smell coffee? I hate you. I still can’t drink it.”
“Well, I had an idea a few days ago and this morning it arrived. I have sourced some bottles you could use to… to… well…um…”
“Empty my breasts into?”
“Yes… Mierda that sounds so bad… but I thought if you did that, you could enjoy a coffee.”
“That, Lucanis Dellamorte, is the most thoughtful thing you could’ve done and I love you very much.”
Lucanis blushed and fetched the empty bottles from a cupboard as Isseya got herself comfortable on the pillows. Spite was crawling around in his head more than pleased with the sight of her topless in bed.
“I know he’s yelling at you.”
“He’s surprisingly quiet but he won’t leave me alone at the same time. Before you even suggest it, I am not letting him out.”
“Poor thing, I’ll let him do it later when you’re asleep.”
“Great, now he’s yelling.”
Lucanis kept his back to Isseya as he prepared her coffee in her favourite way: tiny dash of milk but honey for a sweetener. Gentle groans of relief left his wife’s lips as the pressure in her chest drained away to no waste.
“Gods my nipples are sore. Teia said it gets even worse when teething starts.”
Lucanis said nothing but the clang of the spoon he dropped said everything.
“Rook! Would you like. Spite to. Help wi…”
“No. No. No. Shut up! Mierda I’m sorry. He’s really struggling to compose himself right now.”
“Doesn’t he often use your thoughts for things he says?
“I… am not answering that. Would you like a hand?”
“Oh so he was offering help on your behalf, cheeky.”
“Fuck, no! I didn’t mean like that! I meant like… holding the bottle or something… Mierda someone end me, por favor.”
“You’re too easy to wind up, I swear. Thank you for the offer Vhenan, but at the moment I am fine.”
“You can take the de Riva away from her brother…”
Isseya laughed and placed both filled bottles back into the rune chilled box Lucanis had put on the side to keep the milk fresh. She took the steaming coffee from him and carefully took a sip, relaxing back as the taste hit her. Lucanis smiled and took his place in bed next to her having changed into his sleep clothes. He lay on his side and let his whole body relax for the first time since their daughter was born. Spite had settled on the end of the bed still staring at Rook’s naked chest but he was silent for once.
The whole house was quiet and it felt almost unnatural with a three week old baby downstairs. She was sound asleep in a bassinet next to her great grandmother, completely unaware of how much she’d upended the entire soul of such a large dwelling. Davrin had been visiting Bellara and Irelin for a few days, Cario had gone back to Minrathous to collect what was left of his belongings before returning to Treviso on a permanent basis, Vittoria was spending quality time with her twin sister and Illario had taken to the First Talon role like a duck to water.
“I’m going to stop doing contracts.”
“What? Are you sure? I haven’t said anything to make you think about that have I…?”
“No, amor. I have been doing contracts since I was 18, just over half my life now. I think I want to just be First Talon and a father. I cannot bear the thought of leaving her for weeks at a time to go and kill someone. I couldn’t face her.”
“I understand completely my love. We’ve recruited many Crows who are turning out to be very good at the job, nobody will bet upset about you taking a step back.”
“Caterina…”
“Can be funny all she wants but does she want her great granddaughter to grow up fatherless? Probably not.”
“Say it how it is why don’t you. Honestly I think she’s more scared of you than you are of her so I’ll let you tell her.”
“Oh be a man for once and you tell her, she’ll respect you more.”
“Ha. Sure. Sorry.. I’m tired…”
“Get some sleep, I’m going to go and see if Elaris has woken up at all and if not, I’ll be back.”
*****
Dinner was a quiet affair with all the Dellamorte’s and Vittoria around. Lucanis had sent down a nice and simple menu to the kitchens and it was more than satisfying to the five people capable of eating it. He sat in his usual seat carefully watching everyone’s body language to gauge the best time to drop his bombshell on his grandmother. Everyone was happy and relaxed and he was acutely aware that he could ruin that with a few short words.
“Grandmother, how is your meal?”
“Don’t try that, my boy. Just tell me.”
“Te.. wha… fine. I wish to retire from doing contracts and simply exist as First Talon like most other Talons do.”
“Okay. That’s an issue, is it? Nero hasn’t done a contract in about five years and when was the last time you saw Viago do a contract that wasn’t done in less than a week, huh?”
“Are you well?”
“Don’t be stupid my boy, I am perfectly well and I am fine with your decision. I stopped doing contracts the moment I became Talon. Why do something I could make a multitude of other people do instead?”
“You’re genuinely fine with me solely being a desk Talon?”
“Yes, now stop your fretting and enjoy your pasta.”
Illario was chuckling opposite him as he sank back down into his seat to finish his dinner. He’d spent all afternoon playing that conversation out in his head and none of the sixteen scenarios he’d made up had Caterina being fine with his choice.
He was still quiet when he got back into bed some hours later after settling Elaris into her cot. He stroked Isseya’s back as she settled on his chest, still swirling in his own thoughts.
“Luc, she’s genuinely fine with you not doing another contract. Stop thinking about it.”
“I can’t, it felt too easy.”
“Just because you spent all day overthinking it, doesn’t mean it was too easy. It means you spent all day overthinking it.”
“I hate you sometimes, I really do.”
“I know, now get some sleep.”
“I don’t know what sleep is anymore, do you?”
“Not really but I wouldn’t change a single minute for anything, she is truly my greatest gift. Even if she looks almost exactly like you after nine months inside of me.”
“What can I say, we have good genes in the Dellamorte family.”
Isseya laughed and kissed him gently before holding his hand on his chest. Elaris slept soundly in her cot next to the bed, watched fervently by her Spirit guardian. The house once more stilled as the moons of Thedas took their hold over the night sky.