Chapter Text
Sometimes none of it still feels real.
Over the course of a year and a half, Hongjoong had gone above and beyond and managed to keep Seonghwa on his toes everyday since the start of the relationship. It ranges from smaller things like forcing him out of his office for a lunch-date between his own busy schedule, to much larger things like renting out an entire planetarium for their one-year anniversary so Seonghwa can see more than what the light-polluted city has to offer.
Even on this day, when they awake in the morning similar to many other mornings, wrapped around each other with nothing covering them besides the same thin and slightly worn-out comforter on Hongjoong’s bed, Seonghwa finds himself determining whether it’s all a dream or not.
“Good morning, baby.” Hongjoong whispers, his voice still raspy from sleep, a hand softly carding through Seonghwa’s darkened locks.
The pet-names are certainly something he’ll never get over either. Somehow the most basic ones feel more poetic since they’re coming from the love of his life. It doesn’t matter how many times he hears them, he’ll always have butterflies fluttering around within his stomach
A kiss as light as a feather is placed upon his forehead, his temples, his cheeks, the tip of his nose, and finally landing on the plush of his lips. Seonghwa feels himself squirm from the affection and tries to turn away to the other side of the bed, but fails when a sturdy set of arms prevent him from doing so, if anything, pulling him closer to Hongjoong in the end.
“You’re so beautiful like this…” Hongjoong’s eyes dance across every feature of his lover’s face, unable to settle on a single area. His eyes trail from across his face to below his collarbones and down the toned expanse of his midriff. He never fails to feel like an art-piece in a museum when Hongjoong gazes at him with such yearning in his eyes.
“The more you say that, the sooner it’ll lose its meaning.” Seonghwa teases, playing with the chain that dangles loosely from the other man’s neck.
“The words I use to describe you could never lose their meaning as long as you’re here to hear them.”
As expected from the man who produces almost all of his groups’ albums, and writes a majority of the lyrics as well, everything he says is nothing but pure poetry, especially when it comes to the way he describes Seonghwa. And he’ll never get tired of hearing whatever he might come up with next.
“You’re too much for my heart, Kim Hongjoong.”
“And you’re everything and more for mine, Park Seonghwa.”
They meet in the middle, sharing a kiss amongst the early morning rays announcing their appearance through the sheer curtains still hung as they were a year-and-a-half ago. It’s nothing vulgar, not like the ones they shared the night before. The ones that left Seonghwa breathless and calling out for his lover’s name throughout. A simple note of affection, is all. To show that they’re both there in the moment, and it really isn’t a dream.
After some reluctance of desiring even a few more seconds of rest, Seonghwa finally forces himself and Hongjoong to free themselves from the comforter tangled at the bottom of their legs. Seonghwa senses eyes burning into the expanse of his bare-back as he stretches the sleep out from his joints. When he turns around, arms still reaching above his head, he should have entirely expected to see the pure lust pouring from Hongjoong’s eyes. The man is still in bed, but sitting up against the headboard and trailing his eyes over every centimeter of Seonghwa’s being before him. Now he really does feel like an art-piece in the middle of a showroom.
Carefully, Seonghwa turns around fully and crawls back onto the bed on all fours, matching the same sultry expression as the other man. When he lands only a few centimeters from his lips, he keeps a heavy gaze as he watches his lover anticipate whatever may happen next. As much as Seonghwa would love to continue the previous nights’ festivities, his muscles are still somewhat sore and he would hate to cause anymore discomfort. So when he stops just shy of placing a kiss upon Hongjoong’s more-than-ready lips, he can’t help but laugh a small puff of air through his nostrils in adoration.
“You’re just so needy, aren’t you?” He asks as he watches Hongjoong’s expression change like the flip of a switch.
“What—No, I’m—I’m not… I just thought—” Hongjoong stutters as he tries to save himself from this situation he clearly never stood a chance against.
Seonghwa chuckles to himself and pulls himself back off the bed to proceed to dig through Hongjoong’s closet for anything so he doesn’t scar any of the members who might already be awake and starting their day as well. After he throws on a simple shirt and pair of shorts, forgoing any underwear for now, he loiters around the doorway before opening it and making his entrance. “I’ll let you have the bathroom first, y’know.”
Seonghwa’s gaze trails halfway down Hongjoong’s body before the other brings the comforter up over himself out of shame.
“Yah, Park Seonghwa! You’re cruel!” He hears as he exits the bedroom and closes the door behind him, stifling a full laugh in the process.
He makes his way down the hallway and truthfully doesn’t expect to see anyone up yet. It’s one of the rare days where none of the members have a schedule for that day, so he anticipated them all to still be sound asleep this early in the day. When he sees Wooyoung already awake and even cooking breakfast, he’s genuinely stunned. The younger man senses a presence behind him and turns to see who it might just be. “Oh, hyung! Good morning!”
“Good morning, indeed, Wooyoungie.” He walks over and scruffs the man’s hair, earning a face of displeasure in return.
They’ve all grown accustomed to Seonghwa practically living in the dorm with them. Of course he still resides in his one-bedroom apartment every now and then, but he’s also grown accustomed to the abundance of seven other men filling the void he didn’t even know he held within him. On the rare occasions he does return to his residence, he longs for the chaos and space-invaders that occupy this dorm. You would think as someone who once so desperately craved silence and being on his own, he would absolutely despise stepping foot in a residence like this. But it’s far from the truth. He considers this somewhat overcrowded dorm his home more than where he’s lived for the past five and a half years.
Though, with the success ATZ has managed to bring in, domestically and internationally, Hongjoong had let it slip one day that the company is considering splitting them into three different apartments soon. There was no date set in stone just yet, but he imagines it’ll be soon since Hongjoong had mentioned something about their lease ending soon. So Seonghwa cherishes the extra loud nights even more than before now.
“Where’s Hongjoongie-hyung? Still sleeping?” Wooyoung disrupts him from his thoughts, peering behind Seonghwa as if the leader is hiding.
“Oh… He, uh… Had something to take care of.”
Wooyoung’s initial inquisitive expression quickly dispersed and is replaced with one of pure disgust instead. “I did not need to know about that, hyung. Just say he’s sleeping next time. For the love of God…”
The younger man returns to whatever he’s cooking up in the pan in front of him and Seonghwa takes a seat at one of the barstools at the kitchen island. Not too much later, they hear more footsteps sound behind them from the hallway and Seonghwa watches as Hongjoong emerges, a slight sheen soaking into his skin. His devilish smile doesn’t fade as the leader pads over to the kitchen island, not saying a word. When Wooyoung turns around, he can’t look either of them in the eyes.
“You know, sometimes I miss the days when you two were afraid of acting like a couple in front of all of us.” Wooyoung returns his attention to the pan on the stove, shaking his head in moderate disgust.
Hoongjoong’s eyes widen in horror and Seonghwa really has to stifle his laughter this time. He truly didn’t intend for any of this to happen, but he loves how his lover’s face turns a lovely shade of beet-red after being exposed so suddenly.
“What’s so funny?” San questions as he enters the common area, rubbing the tired away from his eyes. Seonghwa turns to peer over his shoulder and watches as the man’s eyes bounce between the couple in front of him.
“You don’t wanna know, Sannie.” Wooyoung finally shuts the burner off and prepares to pour the contents of the pan onto a plate on the counter to his left. “Is anyone else awake yet?”
As if on queue, Yunho and Yeosang trail out, followed by Mingi and Jongho not too long after. Seonghwa is honestly shocked to see all of them up this early. Some of them have poor tendencies to stay up well into the next day, simply used to it from living that kind of life the past five years. Either way, Seonghwa appreciates being able to enjoy breakfast with the seven other men after so long. They’re already preparing for the next comeback, and from what Hongjoong has shown Seonghwa, it’s going to be their most insane one yet. He says that about practically every comeback he learns about, but it’s genuinely true. They manage to outdo themselves each and every time. Not only with the music they release, but also with breaking their own records from previous comebacks. ATZ has been popular since their debut, but their number of fans keep growing exponentially with every album. Seonghwa can’t possibly express how proud he is of this group he calls his family.
The shared breakfast doesn’t last long. Mingi has to hurry for a meeting with some outsider producers before noon. Yeosang and San want to get to the gym as quickly as they can so they can have the rest of the day to relax and do nothing else. Yunho and Jongho only plan on playing video games for as long as they can before it eventually fatigues them as usual. That leaves Wooyoung who says he’s going to meditate to erase any impure visualizations from his imagination, and slams his door a little harder than he actually intends to.
Hongjoong has since retired to the couch not too far from the kitchen island, sitting with his arms wide open for Seonghwa to come and join him. Without any hesitation, the older man crash-lands into the embrace and snuggles underneath the way-too-small blanket that typically hangs on the back of the couch. They only sit there for a moment before the thought that’s been on Seonghwa’s mind for a couple weeks finally airs from his mouth.
“I think I’m ready.”
Seonghwa turns his head more abruptly than he’d like to admit, but the confession caught him off-guard. “Y-You are? Are you sure?”
Hongjoong chews at his bottom lip and nods.
“I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I think I’ll be okay.”
Seonghwa finds Hongjoong’s hands under the blankets and holds on to them, his thumb brushing over the smooth backside.
After they had become official, Hongjoong sat Seonghwa down for a talk one night.
“Hwa, do you have a minute?”
Seonghwa is lying in his lover’s bed, waiting for the man to finish up saying goodnight to the other members. It’s not too late in the night, but some of them had to be up earlier in the morning for a schedule. If anything, the sun had just barely set. He looks up from his phone and sees Hongjoong standing behind the now closed bedroom door.
Everything between them had been going so smoothly. It’s nearing their one-year anniversary and Seonghwa can’t lie when he says he’s nervous about the rapidly approaching date. This time last year they had only just rekindled everything. Even though they both missed each other like crazy during their time apart, it had still been awkward for the first couple of days. Then sure enough, it was damn near impossible to separate them until Hongjoong finally asked out Seonghwa.
So when he suddenly hears concern come from Hongjoong’s voice, he fears the worst. “Is everything okay?”
The younger man sits on the edge of the bed beside Seonghwa’s legs, fiddling with the rings on his hands as a nervous habit.
“Yes, well—Yes and no.”
Hongjoong’s posture is unlike one he’s seen, even during all of the hardships they’ve gone through. It’s rare for the other to come to Seonghwa with concerns, but when he sits before him, visibly anxious, he’s unsure what to expect.
Seonghwa promptly puts his phone down and furrows his brows. There’s no way he’s breaking up with him, right? This isn’t what’s about to happen, is it? A million thoughts are running through his head and Hongjoong is just sitting there, not answering any of them as if he has a direct insight to Seonghwa’s thoughts.
“Um, I don’t—I’m not sure how to word this properly…”
Oh my god.
I’m getting broken up with
What happened? What went wrong? It’s only a few weeks before their anniversary, and he has the gall to do it now? After they spent the whole day together? What is wrong with—
“Are you breaking up with me?” Seonghwa blurts out, his brows still furrowed, and a lump forming in his throat.
After everything they’ve been through? He’s ending it like this? What a cowardly—
“What? Hwa—Oh my god, no! That’s not—That’s not what this is!” Hongjoong’s eyes widen at the implication of his approach and he waves his hands in the air as if he’s wiping the thought from Seonghwa’s head. “Oh my god, Hwa—I’m so sorry, that’s really not what I was trying to—I promise.”
He takes his lover’s hands into his own and is staring deeply into his eyes. The man has genuine fear in his eyes over unintentionally creating this scenario they’re now engulfed in. Seonghwa is still on edge, but he relaxes his expression and forces himself to take a deep breath. “What’s going on, then?”
“It’s the company.” Hongjoong says with an ounce of regret still thick in his voice. “They’ve been getting ‘reports’ of us going on dates and the CEO specifically called me in for a meeting the other day.”
Seonghwa recalls that day crystal clear. He had been busy at work, completely missing Hongjoong’s text that he had to bail on their dinner plans for that night, something about a sudden meeting with the CEO he couldn’t get out of. At first Seonghwa let his insecurities get the best of him, but after he wallowed in misery and then forced himself to eat dinner in his lonely apartment, he realized there’s no reason for Hongjoong to be fabricating something like that. Never in the almost year they’ve been together has the other man bailed on plans at the very last minute like that. To make up for it, Hongjoong came over as soon as he could and they spent the night cuddled up in Seonghwa’s bed for a change.
“He asked me personally if there’s anything going on between us.” Hongjoong continues, “I-I didn’t know what to say, but he already knew, apparently. He just wanted to hear it directly from me.”
“I guess I was expecting this to happen at some point, but do we really have to? I mean of course I want to be able to love you publicly, but it’s not—”
“I know, baby.” He brings Seonghwa’s hands up to his own lips and places a gentle kiss to them, “I told him that and he understood as someone who’s known me for practically a decade at this point, but as the CEO, he needs to provide an answer on behalf of something like this.”
Something like this…
Meaning the leader of the nation’s most popular boy group is dating a man. Seonghwa knows exactly what Hongjoong means without needing to say it. He didn’t like to face this side of their relationship too often. It makes his existence feel too heavy, too political. As if their relationship dictates how well the group will continue to do, and which investors might pull out as a result.
“He didn’t demand an answer right away. He knows how big of a deal this is and will give us as much time as possible. It’s just, he will need an answer eventually.”
Seonghwa gnaws at the inside of his cheek.
“What about you, Joongie? What do you want to do?”
Hongjoong gulps and tears his gaze away for just a moment.
“I’m terrified, actually.” His lover admits, “I want to just rip it off like a band-aid, y’know, get it over with. But it’s not that simple. I-I don’t want to make it about just me but this could seriously ruin everything I’ve worked so hard for, a-and everything the other members worked for. I shouldn’t have to worry about that when it comes to being authentic about who I am. I should be able to shout from the rooftops that I’m dating the one-and-only Park Seonghwa, but I can’t.”
Seonghwa watches as a tear slips down Hongjoong’s cheek and he wastes no time in wiping it away, moving to sit beside him and pull him into an embrace. Hongjoong wraps his arms around Seonghwa’s frame and weeps softly.
That might have been the rockiest part of their relationship, that night. Which considering everything else they’ve been to prior, is not horrible by comparison. Seonghwa remembers having to comfort Hongjoong for much longer than he expected, and even some of the lingering members were concerned about their leader’s wails coming from behind the closed door.
Normally Seonghwa would be the one in that situation, but the moment he accepted Hongjoong’s question on the rooftop, he had begun working on the idea of publicly coming out. It’s something he spent entire sessions on with his therapist, so he had been prepared for a while actually. It constantly lived in the back of his mind, but he knew the minute they would announce their relationship, it would change everything. Even though Seonghwa isn’t an idol, he’s very well known amongst the fans and even to the public that keeps up with other idol groups. All eyes would be on him, Hongjoong, ATZ, and the company.
So when Hongjoong finally came to him, almost a year after them being together, he had to do nothing but prepare fully for the change. However, it ended up that Hongjoong needed more time to weigh the pros and cons. At the end of the day, this affects him more than Seonghwa in every way possible. Hongjoong is a public figure, that’s his job. Even though they say negative attention is still attention, this kind of attention could easily bury Hongjoong’s reputation and force him out of his career. It might be easier for Seonghwa if the same thing happened, but for Hongjoong, everything is at stake.
“They’re not pressuring you, are they?” Seonghwa asks after a couple beats of silence. It had been a few months since that conversation, and he knows the company needs an answer eventually. It wouldn’t be shocking.
“No, the CEO-nim has been very understanding. I just think I reached that point where I don’t care what people say.” Hongjoong is staring off into space, but his hand stays engulfed by Seonghwa’s. “I know everything will be okay because I have you and the members by my side.”
Seonghwa’s heart softens and he brings his lover's hands to his lips and leaves a chaste kiss against his knuckles. “I’ll always be there for you, no matter what, my beloved.”
—
KQ Entertainment confirms dating rumors between ATZ Leader, Kim Hongjoong, and non-celebrity friend, Park Seonghwa
Earlier this morning on the official SNS accounts for world-renowned K-Pop Boy Group ATZ, a notice was posted on behalf of KQ Entertainment themselves regarding dating rumors between the leader, Kim Hongjoong, and his non-celebrity friend, Park Seonghwa. The two have an extensive history with one another, so while this news comes as a shock to some, others have been anticipating a statement like this (below).
“Hello. This is KQ Entertainment.
After lengthy discussions with our artist, Kim Hongjoong, we would like to confirm the rumors circulating online in regards to his romantic relationship.
While it is unknown to us the exact timeframe of when Kim Hongjoong’s relationship began with the other individual, we are aware they have been sharing positive feelings with another for quite some time.
We ask everyone to please respect the privacy of not only our artist, but also for the non-celebrity individual involved as well. Any defamation made against our artist will not be tolerated and any appropriate action will be taken.
Thank you.”
There has been a wide variety of reactions from online netizens regarding the statement, ranging from pure enthusiasm for the happy couple to spitting negative intentions towards the nature of the relationship.
@atzislife_
omg!!! i knew they were dating !!! i’m so happy for them (σ≧▽≦)σ
@hongsjoongstimes
wow… i can’t believe hongjoong is actually dating someone… i guess we can’t use the jokes of him not having friends anymore
@_hongjoongsprincess_
no this can’t be true… i refuse to believe it ! why would he go and date someone when his fans are right here!!!
@flops_atz_
yesss finally their downfall is happening… i’ve been waiting for this day but who knew their own leader would betray them !
Despite the negative posts and comments that have found their quick five-seconds of fame, the overall support for ATZ’s leader, Kim Hongjoong has been overwhelming. Hashtags across various social media sites have been trending worldwide in support of the celebrity. Even fans from other K-Pop groups have been congratulating the happy couple, and praising Kim Hongjoong for his bravery.
We wish nothing but good health and happiness for the couple.
Published 2023.07.20 14:06 by Na Sullyoon of Dispatch
—
With comeback preparations coming up, and the members moving into their new dorm buildings, the company decided to wait until everything had settled to release the statement.
Of course, everyone was beyond anxious for the reactions that would come as a result. While the CEO of KQ Entertainments assured Hongjoong and the rest of the members that nothing will happen to the group, dread loomed over everyone’s heads in the coming months.
Seonghwa remembers being curled up with Hongjoong against his chest, gentle snores sounding from his slightly agape mouth when the statement dropped in the early hours of the morning. They knew what day it’d be released, but what time was a mystery. It took everything in Seonghwa to convince Hongjoong to not lock himself in the studio for the whole night in an attempt to distract himself. Finally, the leader gave in when he realized staying up all night would do more harm than good and allowed himself to curl up in his lover's warm embrace.
The immediate reaction, at least among fans, had been overwhelmingly supportive, just as Seonghwa expected. If there’s one thing Seonghwa has picked up from ATZ’s fanbase, it is just how much they genuinely care about the members. When it comes to them, he never feared rejection or anything of the like. Hongjoong assured he felt the same way, but there was still the looming worry hanging above his head that maybe their love is conditional, and this is out of the condition. Thankfully, that hadn’t been the case. In fact, Hongjoong’s latest post on one of the social media accounts had been filled to the brim of supportive comments for the leader, even though the post from a few days prior had nothing to do with the statement. If Seonghwa had to hold a happily weeping Hongjoong in his arms for hours on end as he read every individual comment, that is kept between the two of them only.
Even now, a couple weeks after the fact, Seonghwa still catches Hongjoong scrolling through every post he bookmarked on his burner account, a smile never leaving his face every time. There’s easily thousands of posts, but somehow the leader has read every single one probably thrice at this point. What late nights used to be spent restlessly turning from side to side are now spent skimming through heartwarming comments from fans. Before, Seonghwa would have to convince him to come to bed instead of stress-producing, but now it seems as though he has to pry his lover’s phone from his hands so he can get a decent night's sleep.
“I just still can’t believe it…” Hongjoong whispers, eyes glistening as he stares at the ceiling above him, finally setting his phone down on the nightstand beside his bed.
It’s still early in the morning, and the new dorm is still rather jarring to adjust to, especially since Hongjoong’s only roommate is Wooyoung. While the younger member is always finding a way to fill the silence, there are the rare moments, just like now, where it’s eerily silent. The other two dorms, consisting of Yunho and Yeosang, and San, Mingi and Jongho respectively, can also fall on the same spectrum. Who knew that only when you have all seven of them in one dorm does the chaos truly ensue.
Seonghwa finds himself clung to Hongjoong’s side, much like he finds himself most mornings they spend together. Of course, Seonghwa still has his own apartment, but it’s much easier nowadays to crash at Hongjoong’s dorm since it’s closer to his office building. If anything, the company doesn’t mind, and neither does Wooyoung, except for the times where… Nevermind.
“Believe what, my love?” Seonghwa mumbles into Hongjoong’s neck, sleep still evident in his voice.
“All of this… That I finally have you… And that I don’t have to hide any of it anymore.” The younger man turns his gaze away from the ceiling and stares at his lover the best he can from their current position. Seonghwa pulls his head back ever so slightly to meet Hongjoong’s gaze. “I love you so much, Hwa. More than words could ever prove.”
Oh…
They’ve said I love you plenty of times, but every time feels like the first and Seonghwa’s heart clenches each time. As if he’ll never not experience butterflies from hearing those three simple words. He hopes that five, ten, twenty, and even thirty years from now he still feels the same way he feels today. A knot in his stomach, but out of pure love for the man before him. The man he never thought he’d get to love publicly given his career.
“Oh, Joongie… I love you just as much, if not more. I don’t think I could ever stop.”
Hongjoong bridges the small gap between them and connects their lips in a chaste kiss. Something sweet to cherish in the moment. That’s all it is. It ends exactly where it begins but the butterflies never leave Seonghwa’s stomach even after they pull apart a moment later.
“You know… I’ve been thinking…” Seonghwa admits, eyes half-closed, the temptation of falling back asleep looming over him.
“Uh-oh, that can’t be good…” Hongjoong jokes and Seonghwa uses what little energy he has to smack at his lover’s arm playfully, earning an earnest giggle from the younger man. “I’m joking, I’m joking. What’s been on your mind, bun?”
Bun…
That’s another thing he’ll never grow accustomed to. The silly little pet-names Hongjoong comes up with. Even if they’re ones that other couples most likely use as well, it makes Seonghwa feel special regardless. Especially since Hongjoong only uses names like that for him.
“I might make a statement myself.”
Even though Hongjoong says he doesn’t have to hide anymore, there’s parts he does have to conceal from the public. In the statement released by the company, they didn’t specify by name who Hongjoong was involved with rumors with, even though fans, and the general public had a pretty good idea. They wanted to leave that up to the couple themselves to disclose if they ever wanted. More like if Seonghwa ever wanted to bring himself into the spotlight fully.
When it came to the lawsuit, that felt entirely different, at least that’s what Seonghwa tells himself. That was about justice being brought to him and Hongjoong for being victims of stalking, so of course he wouldn’t mind his name being plastered all over that. And back then, the couple weren’t anything more than friends so it didn’t look suspicious. At least that’s what he tells himself, once more.
But now…
Seonghwa himself wants to share Hongjoong with the world, even if his lover is already worldwide famous. He wants to share the Hongjoong he loves and adores with every being of his soul. To not hide his love for the other man any longer.
“Oh! That’s great, honey.” A hand snakes its way out from underneath the blanket and finds itself cupping Seonghwa’s cheek. “You’re not doing it just because of me, though, right?”
“No—Well, partially. But not like that… I just want to be able to show everyone how much I love you, Joongie. I don’t think I can hold back much longer.”
Their second anniversary is already in a few months, and the only ones who really know about them besides the company and the members are their parents, and a few other close friends. Seonghwa wants to be able to shout from any rooftop that he’s dating the one-and-only Kim Hongjoong. Not that he ever would, because he’s not out of his mind, but he would like the option to, you know? Everyone should deserve to know how lucky he is to have such a wonderful partner.
Hongjoong can only gaze at him with nothing but adoration and pure love. The same look he’s given Seonghwa over the years, but only now does he finally understand the true intent behind the gaze. There’s something on the tip of his tongue, and movement twitching from his fingertips, but Hongjoong holds back and asks something else instead. “What were you thinking of doing? Posting something on your Instagram?”
Seonghwa smiles deviously, earning a look of perplexity from his lover. “Something like that… But maybe not on Instagram.”
After Hongjoong begrudgingly gets up, having to meet some producers at the studio soon, he leaves Seonghwa behind to laze around for a little bit longer until their dinner plans later in the evening. The bedsheets that were once occupied by two warm bodies begin to grow cold from the absence of one of them, so Seonghwa finds himself getting up as well. The dorm is rather quiet, signaling that Wooyoung must be asleep as well, or already out and about. The members’ dorm became Seonghwa’s second home a long time ago, but now, in the new dorm he feels an awkwardness linger as he pads across the floor on his own free will.
There’s remnants of a breakfast Wooyoung must have cooked earlier in the morning, a small handwritten note left on the counter for either in the couple to discover and dig in. Although, it seems as though Hongjoong left the entirety of it for Seonghwa as it remains untouched from the wrapping Wooyoung had done. A frown tugs on his face as he unwraps it, carefully placing the plate in the microwave for a few minutes. Hopefully Hongjoong grabs something on his way to the studio.
Some point after Seonghwa finishes the breakfast and while he’s now lounging on the sofa, Wooyoung comes home in a rather disheveled and sweaty state, signifying he must have been working out either on his own or with some of the other members.
“Oh, you’re still here. Did you eat the leftovers, hyung?” Wooyoung chimes as he peers around the corner, elated to see Seonghwa still in the dorm.
“Mm, I did, they were delicious. Thank you, Wooyoungie.” Seonghwa sits up from his spot, throwing his arms up in the air and stretching his muscles. “Were you at the gym?”
Seonghwa stares at the sweat-soaked shirt clinging to Wooyoung’s rather defined abdomen, teasing the existence of a six-pack beneath the thin piece of fabric. That’s something he’s definitely grateful for when it comes to Hongjoong. That his lover doesn’t work out nearly as often, or intensely, as some of the other members. The chance of him jumping Hongjoong’s bones would skyrocket significantly had the leader spent more time defining his already lean and toned body.
“Yeah, San wanted to get an early workout in today, but damn, he’s relentless!” Wooyoung trudges over to the sofa and collapses a decent distance from Seonghwa, not wanting to invade his personal space in his current state.
They fall into a comfortable conversation ranging from the workouts San put Wooyoung through, to what their plans for the rest of the day are. When Seonghwa brings up his idea of wanting to release a “statement” as well, Wooyoung perks up, his eyes asking for the older man to tell more without even needing to ask.
“I haven’t told Joongie yet, but I was thinking I could post something from my fansite account.” Seonghwa spills, nervous to hear what Wooyoung’s opinion might be.
“Oh my god… That’s… That’s actually really cute, hyung. I never would have thought of that!” Wooyoung’s expression softens and his lips tug into a gentle pout.
The idea had come to Seonghwa a while ago, but he wasn’t sure how well it would work out in actuality, so he never brought it up. At least not until now. While he contemplated posting on Instagram, he figured it might not reach as far as Seonghwa wishes it to. Sure, most fans of ATZ have already pieced together who Hongjoong might be dating, but Seonghwa himself wants to confirm it, and doing it through his fansite seems like the most plausible way. Besides, he hasn’t been active on that account in years and now it seems like he might never actually return as intended. So why not leave this as a small gift for everyone who supported him in the short amount of time? Almost like a bittersweet ending for everyone who’s awaited for his return.
Wooyoung leaves momentarily to shower so Seonghwa takes the time to scroll through his photos in an attempt to choose the best ones for his post. The album he has dedicated with photos of him and Hongjoong dates all the way back to 2018, starting with just before ATZ made their debut. One of the first photos in the album is a simple selfie of the couple, but most of Hongjoong’s face is hidden behind Seonghwa’s shoulder and Seonghwa is flashing a cheesy grin. Every now and then Seonghwa scrolls all the way back and looks at this one the most often. If only the two in the photo knew how much they’d grow, and how they’d be living their dreams together. He clicks the heart icon on the photo to save it to his favorites, making it easier to find when he goes to make the actual post later.
When Wooyoung returns, he collapses on the couch beside Seonghwa, smelling freshly of his shampoo and body wash, the ends of his hair still slightly damp and dripping onto the couch every so often. “Have you decided what pictures you want to use?”
“Ugh, there’s so many…” Seonghwa has about five years of photos to scroll through. Even though a majority of them are from before they were a couple, they still hold a special memory in Seonghwa’s heart. He can remember every purpose behind each picture, rewinding the memory in his mind as he scrolls through.
It takes longer than either expected, but Seonghwa finally settles on four photos for the post. He swipes through them easily in his favorites tab and is content with the ones he’s chosen thanks to Wooyoung’s help. He won’t lie when he admits he was worried in choosing ones that seem too couply, but Wooyoung convinced him to go with what his heart desires. Seonghwa’s main concern being that some fans might not like seeing Hongjoong being affectionate with someone else, but Wooyoung reminded him that everyone and their mother already knows he’s dating someone, so what’s the point in holding back.
While he’s scrolling through the photos, Wooyoung having got up and returned to his room, Seonghwa’s phone begins buzzing in his hand, signaling an incoming phone call. Of course, the caller ID brings an immediate smile to his face as he swipes to answer the call. “Hi, Joongie.”
“Hi, my love. What are you up to?” Hongjoong's voice echoes a little bit, sounding as though he’s left the studio and is somewhere else already.
“Not much… Wooyoungie came home a while ago so he was helping me pick what photos to use in a post later. Are you finished up already?” Seonghwa pulls his phone away from his ear and peeks at the time. It’s a couple hours earlier than when Hongjoong estimated he’d be home by, but Seonghwa isn’t complaining.
“Ah, yeah. One of the other producers had to leave early so we all decided to call it there. I should be home soon.”
Ah… That explains it.
If there’s one thing Seonghwa’s learned about Hongjoong, even long before they got together, it’s that Hongjoong would never willingly leave the studio earlier than his scheduled time. If anything, the younger man would even push past the time some times, abandoning any other miniscule plans later in the day. Seonghwa can’t blame him though, he gets the same way when it comes to editing his photos, whether it’s at work or in his free time. Maybe that’s why they work so well. Any other partner would be devastated by the lack of attention, but they both have bad habits of getting sucked into their work.
“Okay, I’ll show you the pictures when you come home. I think you’ll approve of them.” Seonghwa has a sweetness in his voice that Hongjoong never gets sick of. They say their goodbyes and Hongjoong hangs up a moment later, leaving Seonghwa with stray butterflies in his stomach for no reason.
It doesn’t take too much longer for Hongjoong to return home, and falls into the arms of Seonghwa who is still sprawled out on the sofa in the small living room. Hongjoong burrows his head in his lover’s chest and sighs deeply, nuzzling his nose at the sternum in front of him. The younger man hadn’t been gone for too long, not as long as he usually is when it comes to being in the studio, but he’s acting as if they’ve been apart for weeks, maybe even months. Seonghwa will always relish in the way the attention makes him feel.
“Is everything okay?” Seonghwa asks, with only a slight worry behind the question. Of course Hongjoong is affectionate, but on the days where he’s more clingy than usual, Seonghwa wonders if there’s something going on in the younger man’s head he can’t pick up on.
He feels Hongjoong nod against his chest, paying attention to the way his grasp around Seonghwa’s waist tightens. “Mm, just missed you… Didn’t want to leave you this morning…”
“Joongie…” Seonghwa’s heart swells and he feels like he might lose his mind. This is definitely something he’ll never grow accustomed to, and he hopes it remains like that for the rest of their time together. Whether it’s five, ten, twenty, or fifty years from now. Seonghwa hopes the butterflies Hongjoong causes him never go away. “You were only gone for a little while. You’re acting as though we haven’t seen each other in weeks…”
Seonghwa’s hand was gently caressing the back of his lover’s head until Hongjoong snaps his neck upwards and pouts. A small puff of air shoots from his nostrils right before he asks, “Is a man not allowed to miss the love of his life?”
Oh no… Here we go…
When it comes to Hongjoong being in these types of moods, he always playfully teases Seonghwa for being overwhelmed by the sudden clinginess. Of course, the elder man struggles to find the line between playfulness and seriousness. Nine times out of ten it’s Hongjoong acting teasingly, but the one time it wasn’t Seonghwa learned it was due to stress from an upcoming comeback he hadn’t known about yet.
“I never said that! I just wanted to make sure nothing’s bothering you. That’s all, my love.” Seonghwa protests, feeling his cheeks heat up from the joking accusation.
“Sigh, my boyfriend must not have missed me as much as I missed him… While I was out at war… Fighting for my life on the front lines…” Hongjoong’s head collapses back into Seonghwa’s chest and he fake whines, shaking his head in the process.
If there’s one thing Seonghwa has learned, it is to indulge Hongjoong in this behavior until it’s out of his system. Otherwise they might end up in a small argument. Even though those result in some of the best sex he’s ever had—but that’s besides the point.
“I’m sorry, my Joongie. I missed you terribly while you were gone… Fighting on the front lines…” He plays into it and hears a small giggle come from the younger man, the sound vibrating against Seonghwa’s ribcage.
“It’s okay, my dear, we’re finally reunited at last… And we get to enjoy a feast later tonight as well.” Hongjoong turns his head so he’s staring up at his lover, but still keeping it planted where he can hear the other man’s erratic heartbeat. “Maybe two feasts, if I’m lucky.”
That part of their relationship is certainly… Superlative. Let’s just say. While in the beginning it took some time, figuring out what each other was comfortable with and how to take things slow. There had been too many heated kisses turned into full-fledged makeout sessions, Seonghwa in Hongjoong’s lap, when a member suddenly came home, or even in the studio, and another producer needed Hongjoong’s help with something. Even though Seonghwa has his own apartment, it’s much more out of the way than the dorm was and it seemed almost inconvenient to have a manager drive them just to fuck each other senseless. That and it would most likely scar the manager who most definitely knew something was going on between them.
“Already thinking that far ahead, are we?” Seonghwa looks down at Hongjoong with half-lidded eyes, his hand snaking its way to hold the man at his chin, tilting his head upwards to look at him better. It’s a matter of seconds for Seonghwa to change his expression from love to lust and to watch Hongjoong’s cheeks tint a rosy-pink color.
“Well—I was just…” Hongjoong stammers, eyes struggling to remain in contact with Seonghwa’s. Who already seems as though he’s undressing the younger man with just a sultry look. “Since we planned to go back to your place after dinner I—”
Seonghwa cuts him off with one of his thumbs rubbing at Hongjoong’s plush bottom lip. “We’ll see about that. Maybe if you’re good tonight, then you’ll get that second feast, hm?”
It’s so easy to work up Hongjoong. Too easy, in fact. With the younger man sprawled across him, Seonghwa’s hip right in contact with Hongjoong’s groin, he can already feel a growing presence from only a few words and a simple look. Gently, he tugs Hongjoong forward with the hand still on his chin and places a chaste kiss on those plump lips. It doesn’t go much further than that, even though Hongjoong wants it to. When Seonghwa pulls away after a few sloppy, open-mouthed kisses, he revels in the way Hongjoong squirms on top of him, releasing a delicate whine without intention.
As much as he’d love to take it further, Wooyoung is right down the hall, and their bedrooms are opposite from one another. And if there’s one thing Seonghwa is certain about, it’s that his lover is just as loud in the bedroom as he is in the studio.
“Now, I think you should look at the pictures I chose for my post.” Seonghwa glances away in search of his phone that’s abandoned somewhere on the cushions beside him, ignoring his needy boyfriend on top of him. Once he finds the phone and glances back over in Hongjoong’s direction, the pout has returned but with more of a scowl this time.
“You’re cruel…”
Seonghwa chuckles and places a gingerly kiss atop Hongjoong’s nose. “I think you’re forgetting that Wooyoungie is home… And I don’t think he would want to be scarred, again.”
Hongjoong mumbles something under his breath as Seonghwa grins to himself and unlocks his phone in search of the four photos he chose. It doesn’t take long and he angles the phone so his lover can peer at the screen. Once he swipes through all four, he notices a small pout on Hongjoong’s face still. “Only four pics? I thought you would have wanted to show off more of me…”
“Well…” Seonghwa starts, chewing at his bottom lip. “I thought instead of posting them to my Instagram account, I could share them on mars_1107…”
The younger man’s eyes widen at the mention of Seonghwa’s fansite account, the name he hasn’t heard about in a while. “Oh!”
“Do you—Would that be okay?”
“I don’t see why not, baby. It’s your account after all, and everything is already confirmed about us being together.” Hongjoong looks up at him doefully, his signature smile plastering on his face as well. “I just didn’t expect you to be so bold.”
Seonghwa smiles and fiddles with the case wrapped around his phone.
“I just think it would be nice… Don’t you think? Giving the fans something bittersweet after I basically abandoned the account only a year into your career.” It’s a light-hearted comment, but Hongjoong cocks his head slightly in disagreement. There’s one thing the younger man doesn’t like, and it’s when anyone, even Seonghwa, tries to diminish what they went through. “Sorry… I know it wasn’t like that, but they don’t know and—”
“I think it would be nice, baby.” Hongjoong’s hand reaches up and smooths the skin of Seonghwa’s cheek, his gaze softening. The elder man leans into the touch and closes his eyes, sighing softly. “I’m sure the fans would love it as well. I can already hear them screaming their heads off.”
Seonghwa smiles to himself before Hongjoong drops his head back down against his lover’s chest and hums a random tune, probably something he was working on today at the studio. With his phone still in his hand, he figures he might as well make the post now, before he chickens out and never actually does it. There’s a small knot in his stomach that it’ll cause backlash, but what Wooyoung said earlier is planted firmly in the forefront of his mind. Who cares? If anyone is going to have a problem now, then they most likely already had a problem to begin with, and that’s just simply out of Seonghwa’s control.
After struggling to log back into his fansite account, considering it had been years since he was last logged in, he releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Despite being inactive for so long, there’s still hundreds of new notifications, some as recent as a few weeks ago. How ironic. Seonghwa decides to read through some of them, and damn, ATZ fans are actually really funny. One of them reads, “maybe it’s for the best @mars_1107 dropped off the face of the earth… i think today’s news would devastate them”
Oh if only they knew…
Seonghwa reads some of the notifications to Hongjoong who chuckles along with him. The younger man’s head remains planted against Seonghwa’s chest, tired from craning his neck too much in the hour he’s been home.
A majority of the notifications are quoted tweets of his old posts wishing him to come back, or that he’s at least doing well. None of them are negative and it warms his heart more than he expected. A part of him feared that people were discontent with his never-ending hiatus, but it was far from the opposite. If anything, some people expressed worry about what might have happened in Mars’ life for them to step away from the account for so long, especially without ever officially closing it.
His thumb hovers over the “create post” button for a moment before he finally creates contact with the screen and the post creator screen pops up. The only thing he hadn’t thought about was what to caption this post. If it was for his Instagram account, he would easily type out an entire essay, but since this is his fansite account, Seonghwa contemplates.
Him and Hongjoong work together on a caption, and finally Seonghwa is satisfied with it. He reads through it one more time after attaching all the photos he wants to share to make sure it’s typo-free. Much like he used to do back in the day.
MARS🪐 @mars_1107
230811
MARS & KJH ∞
🪐✨️
#ATZ #에이투지 #KimHongJoong #김홍중 #ParkSeongHwa #박성화
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