Archive of Our Own ^beta

“I just don’t understand how you got into that fridge without thinking twice, I mean have you never read IT?”

It was hard to tell whether Adam was laughing about or scolding Ben and Ben would have kept a straight face either way. The two of them were almost back at their hotel for their final night in South Korea, just about to enter the lobby. It was dark outside already, their dinner had been fantastic, drinks had been had and Adam was in especially high spirits after having bagged another solo win.

Ben had no idea how the topic of their conversation had swerved to their shoot for Unpaid Intern but now he rolled with it.

“I don’t do anything King. Everytime I try there’s some weird-ass convoluted passage halfway through that just doesn’t make sense at all.”

Ben said, playing it cool and not mentioning that the real reason he hadn’t been able to finish The Shining had been the intense sense of unease he had felt at night for weeks after having given up the book halfway in.

Adam cackled his signature goblin laugh. He’d had three drinks. Maybe four? Enough for him to laugh at whatever Ben said even more easily than usual. A smile tugged at the corners of Ben’s lips as they entered the lobby of the hotel and walked towards the elevator.

“There is that evil kid in IT that tortures and kills animals by sticking them into an old fridge until they suffocate.”

Adam explained and now it was Ben’s turn to chuckle, although it was a little awkward.

“Wow, sounds like I really missed something there.”

he answered and Adam burst into another cackle.

“It’s baffling to me how you didn’t even realize that you were getting into a potential death-trap. Usually I am the one that tends to commit to the bit a little too hard.”

Adam said and Ben sighed. He was a little drunk too himself but opposed to Adam there was no win feeding him endless energy. In fact, the only thing keeping him on his feet after that very long day of being the Snaker was Adam and his energy, the euphoria he exuded enough to keep him awake. Ish.

Adam glowing like that was the sun to Ben and he couldn’t help but smile at his friend. Adam was shaking his head.

“So you know nothing about the dangers of refrigerators and you don’t read Stephen King. That’s two strikes in one night.”

Adam rambled as the two of them stepped into the elevator and Ben laughed, both too tired and too boozy to even attempt to understand what the hell that was supposed to mean. Adam probably didn’t know either. Ben pressed the button for their floor and the elevator started to move. A few seconds later the doors opened and Ben and Adam walked a few more steps to the doors of their neighbouring rooms.

“What are you, an expert on suffocation?”

Ben joked as Adam was going through his pockets in search for his keycard. It wouldn’t have been Adam if he didn’t know exactly where it was, even drunk. Ben watched his friend get it out in only a few second but instead of unlocking his door, Adam lingered.

“Well, yeah. I guess you could say that.”

Ben furrowed his brow as Adam made eye contact and gave him the kind of look that Ben had only ever seen on him on the inside of his eyelids when he was alone in his bed and weak enough to allow himself an unethical kind of indulgence. And after three drinks on top of being wiped from shooting a whole ass new season Ben was a very weak man.

“Oh, is that so?”

Ben said lamely, making no attempt to fish for his own keycard.

“Yeah, buddy. Suffocation, asphyxiation, smothering. You name it.”

Adam didn’t break eye contact and neither did Ben. Ben was terrified to disturb whatever was happening here. The way Adam looked at him crept into his bones and caused whatever was going on in his stomach - calling it butterflies would have been an understatement. It felt more like fear than infatuation but Ben’s heart ached nevertheless, all the longing it had experienced for the past week in Korea hitting him like a bag of bricks. Or a fridge door.

Adam took a step closer to Ben who couldn’t have found words if he tried to. Not like it mattered since drunk adam was even more into rambling than sober Adam. Ben nodding slowly was enough to keep him going.

“If there’s no fridge at hand you can also just…”

Adam raised his hands and made a choking motion in the air that made Ben’s palms sweat.

“For the same effect. But faster. And it’s very important where - most people would think that the target should be the trachea…”

Adam slid the keycard in his hand into his back pocket and then put his fingers around Ben’s neck, not yet applying pressure. Ben froze. Touch was something that came naturally to Adam, it was his love language even with his friends so Ben usually wasn’t rattled by it, despite enjoying the occasional intimacy tremendously. A pat on the shoulder, a hug after a challenge well done. That’s what Ben was used to and he knew right away that this was very different from that.

“Like here at the front. People think you’re supposed to squeeze here.”

Adam’s fingertips lightly brushed over Ben’s neck, making him whimper involuntarily and if Adam heard it, he ignored it. Adam was the sun and Ben was drunk and so was Ben and when he was drunk it was so much harder to control himself and be normal about Adam. If only he could be normal about Adam.

“When what you actually want to go for…”

Adam’s touches were giving Ben goosebumps as his nimble fingers moved to the sides of his neck. Ben had to put real effort into holding back the moan that wanted to spill from between his lips so badly.

“...is over here.”

Adam’s fingers pressed down slightly on the sides of Ben’s neck to mark the right spot and Ben held his breath.

“Slight pressure on the carotid arteries. Like this.”

Adam was breathing heavily himself as he spoke and then suddenly squeezed Ben’s neck like he meant it without further warning. Ben’s mouth fell open in a gasp he wasn’t able to make, the surprise that Adam was actually going for it overwhelming his need to play it cool and he let out an embarrassingly needy whine with the last bit of air left in his lungs. His whole body tensed.

The dizziness set in not a second later and Ben’s eyes started to dart around as an automatic reaction to not being able to breathe before they caught Adam’s gaze, watching Ben intently with a hint of… something in his eyes, something Ben couldn’t quite put his finger on. Then his body slackened, no strength in it left to keep the muscles taut.

Adam released Ben’s neck immediately and gently pushed his friend’s back into the wall for support. Ben gasped and coughed, coughed and gasped, trying to do both things at the same time to catch his breath. Ben recovered fast but a needy feeling in his stomach stayed.

He hadn’t wanted Adam to stop.

Everything else but Adam’s angelic face had blurred into insignificance while he had choked Ben, the sensation of his hands on his neck almost spiritual and his face so incredibly beautiful that the tears in Ben’s eyes weren’t the sole result having had his breath cut off.

Ben barely held it together enough to not verbalize any of those things and just gasp for air and cough while he held on to Adam’s image as if he’d drown without it. Adam hadn’t withdrawn his hands from Ben’s neck yet.

“You alright, buddy?”

Adam asked softly, sounding out of breath himself. Ben nodded and opened his mouth, failing at holding back.

“Not quite sure I got that.”

Ben heard himself say and his voice sounded unfamiliar to himself as he spoke, strained, scratchy and uncannily ballsy.

“Oh yeah? Need me to do it again?”

Adam asked with with the same gleam from before in his eyes and Ben felt his friend’s fingers twitch impatiently around his neck. It made something else twitch inside of Ben’s pants. Ben wasn’t sure whether he’d be able to open his mouth without saying way too much so he just pressed his tongue to the top of his palate and nodded, his eyes not letting go of Adam.

“Okay buddy, but try to pay attention this time.”

Adam’s voice echoed in Ben’s ears when Adam squeezed hard again before Ben had had the chance to suck in a last breath to prepare himself and stars started to dance in his field of vision almost immediately. The twitch in his pants turned into a persistent hard-on just as quickly.

Adam’s face. He looked just as disheveled as Ben was probably looking and god-damn-fuck it was hot.

Adam pushed Ben’s back against the wall firmly as he choked him, getting much closer to his friend than the first time around and Ben craved how their bodies would eventually touch if this just went on for long enough. The lack of oxygen made Ben not even care anymore about how that would mean Adam discovering that he was rock hard from being choked by him in the hallway of a hotel. A dizziness that Ben hadn’t known had been missing from his life so far made him focus on the only thing that really mattered here, which, as it now turned out, had been Adam all along.

Ben watched the stars and sparkles take up more and more of his vision until darkness started to creep inwards from its edges and his mouth fell open in a last futile attempt to draw in air before Adam loosened his grip just a little.

It was enough for Ben to draw very shallow breaths that kept him away from the verge of passing out. Ben’s vision cleared up as he hungrily drew those pitiful half-breaths but his mind was still only focussed on one thing only.

“Adam…”

Ben gasped, wasting most of the precious air in his lungs for the one word and the way Adam’s eyes softened at it made it a worthwhile expense.

Ben sucked in more oxygen, hyperaware of how Adam slowly inched closer to him, their bodies almost touching now. Only a little more, just a little bit, a few inches, please… Ben knew that he would be begging Adam for all kinds of things by now if he had the air for it and he wasn't so sure it was a good thing that he didn’t.

“You still don’t get it, do you?”

Adam’s voice was just as raspy and strange-sounding as Ben’s, as if it had been him choking Adam and not the other way around. Adam looked hungry and the way he towered over Ben made Ben whimper, his cock throbbing in his pants.

“Oh buddy….”

Adam was whispering now, his mouth close enough to Ben’s ear to make talking any louder than that unnecessary. There was a yearning in the words that was not unfamiliar to Ben and Adam’s hot breath on his skin went straight to his cock, his erection so hard by now that it was starting to ache.

Adam’s fingers tightened once more and Ben gasped one last time before the airflow to his brain was restricted once again and then embraced the lightheadedness that would turn into pure stupid within the next fifteen seconds.

While the capillaries in the whites of Ben’s eyes burst one by one Adam finally stepped close enough for their chests to touch and when Adam’s thigh brushed against the bulge in Ben’s crotch, Ben felt his eyes roll to the back of his head. Having Adam’s hands around his neck had amplified the pleasure of that simple touch about tenfold and when Ben’s gaze returned to meet Adam’s, his eyes were begging him to do it again.

“There you go…”

Adam’s whisper was rushed and he looked like he was about to bite Ben, his whole demeanor feral, predatory and completely out of character for him. Ben barely recognized his friend, yet desperately craved everything he was willing to give. His lungs felt like they were about to burst when Adam wedged his knee between Ben’s thighs. The blackness started to creep in and Adam released his neck long enough for Ben to draw exactly three breaths before squeezing hard again.

Ben moaned loudly when he felt Adam’s thigh rub against his erection. Having been allowed the opportunity to get some air Ben was now fully ware of Adam pushing his knee upwards, taking some weight off of Ben’s feet and redistributing it to between Ben’s legs, effectively making him ride Adam’s thigh.

Ben found himself humping Adam’s leg with the last few ounces of strength he had left in him while the blood pounded in his ears and he saw only static. And Adam’s face, Adam licking his lips as Ben was about to lose his mind. This was so much more intense than every instance of Ben actually having sex combined and it was so good, so insanely good that Ben felt like he was about to pass out. Adam let him have two more breaths and held eye contact with Ben as he rubbed himself against Adam’s thigh.

“Go ahead, buddy…”

Adam sounded so fucked-out, his words went straight to Ben’s dick.

“Adam…”

Ben moaned breathlessly, weakly moved his hips on Adam’s leg one last time and then came into his pants so hard, it made the world white out for about half a minute. The pleasure was so overwhelming, Ben barely registered when Adam’s hands withdrew from his neck and went to support him by the shoulders instead, his legs too wobbly to be trusted with the task of keeping him upright.

Once it was over, Ben erupted into a mix of coughs and gasps, his head clear enough now to make him turn his face to the side for that. Which was important because Adam had not backed away, his knee still between Ben’s legs and his eyes looking like he was both the hunter and the hunted.

Ben, still catching his breath, immediately got locked into Adam’s gaze again. Adam was so beautiful like that, even more than usual. Ben’s drunk, air-deprived brain didn’t provide him with enough reason to hold back and Ben got on his tippy-toes and leaned forward until his lips crashed into Adam’s.

He wasn’t afraid of rejection like that and he had no reason to be. Adam kissed him back hungrier than Ben had come onto him, the kiss being all rough edges and teeth. Adam bit Ben’s lip hard and pulled, making Ben whine again. Adam then broke the kiss to suck a hickey into the soft skin of Ben’s neck instead, making him moan in both pleasure and pain.

In the drunken frenzy Ben’s stomach brushed over Adam’s crotch and he was not surprised to find that his friend was rock-hard too but it made something inside of him jump nevertheless.

Adam’s lips let go of Ben’s neck and Ben acted fast after having avoided thinking things through. He dropped to his knees in front of Adam, his hands already undoing Adam’s pants and pulling at the waistband before he was fully settled on the floor. Adam didn’t stop him, just whimpered when Ben put his palm on his bulge through his underwear before yanking it down just far enough for Adam’s cock to spring out of it.

Ben was in awe at the sight and had to put effort into holding back. He tilted his head upwards, looking at Adam.

“Can I…?”

Ben croaked out with difficulty and Adam’s gaze was not full of want but sheer need. Adam nodded and Ben watched him swallow hard before Ben returned his attention to Adam’s cock.

Ben carefully put his lips around the tip, swirling his tongue along its underside before carefully starting to take it deeper into his mouth, making sure everything was lubed up nicely with plenty of spit. He tasted sweat, salt and lust. Adam gasped and Ben felt him throb inside of his mouth, making him get half-hard again as well, something Ben hadn’t known he was capable of.

Ben pushed himself forward until Adam’s dick hit the back of his throat, a place that felt weird, like it was bruised. Adam whined and Ben moved back an inch, then slammed back down and held his head there for as long as he could, his face buried into Adam’s brown curls.

“Oh Ben…”

Adam moaned high-pitched and disheveled, his neediness and the mention of his name enough to make Ben grow fully hard again. Ben moved back up and opened his mouth to breathe in when he felt Adam’s hands at the back of his head, fingers intertwining with his hair.

“Such a good boy…”

Adam gasped and pulled Ben’s head towards himself, making Ben gag and choke loudly as he hit the back of his throat again. Ben made a gargling noise, his eyes watering and his nose runny enough to hinder his breathing. Adam didn’t let go though, fucking into Ben’s mouth mercilessly a few more times before letting him up to draw a couple of breaths and then pulling him right back onto his cock again. Ben whimpered, the back of his throat hurting and his cock throbbing in his wet and sticky underwear while he tried very hard not to gag every time Adam jammed his whole length into his mouth.

“You’re doing so well, so good, you… oh yeah, please…”

Adam stammered breathlessly, seemingly unable to shut up while Ben tried to look up at him. Ben had trouble believing that he was finally getting what he had been fantasizing about every other night. Watching Adam come undone like this, him stuttering so desperately all because of him was such a breathtakingly hot sight, Ben was starting to think he might have another orgasm inside of him.

The lack of air as Adam fucked Ben’s mouth took away anything that wasn’t lust yet again and Ben groaned at Adam yanking his hair so hard it hurt. He felt his own hard cock rub against the wet, cum-soaked fabric of his underwear while Adam’s dick lay heavy on his tongue, Adam pulling his head close enough for it to hit the back of his throat and make him choke loudly again. Adam held him there.

“Fuck… Ben… fuck…oh…”

Adam’s words were shaky and drenched in primal need and Ben savoured each and every one of them. Ben and Adam had firm eye contact as a strong, bitter taste flooded Ben’s mouth and Adam’s face twisted with pleasure as he shot his cum down Ben’s throat with a suppressed groan. Ben couldn’t help but stare, trying to take as many mental photos as he could to remember this moment as accurately as possible. Euphoria shot through his body as he rolled around the last few droplets of Adam’s cum in his mouth.

Then Ben carefully pulled back from Adam’s softening dick. Adam sighed and Ben wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he sucked in breath after breath of precious air.

Adam let go of Ben’s hair, gently tousling it before fixing his pants with both of his hands. Adam’s knees seemed unsteady but he stayed upright while Ben made no attempt at getting back up. With the oxygen returning to Ben’s brain the realization of what had just happened crept up to him and a feeling of dread crept up in his stomach.

“So, uh… that’s what I know about suffocation.”

Adam said awkwardly and swallowed hard again.

“Adam…”

Ben started and then got interrupted by the sound of the elevator. All the colour drained from Adam’s face and Ben scrambled to get back to his feet.

A hotel corridor. A fucking hotel corridor! What had they been thinking? They were lucky no other guest had stuck their head out the door at the commotion in the hallway.

“Anyway, uh, goodnight.”

Adam said and brushed his hand over Ben’s shoulder with a haunted look in his eyes. The touch was back to how Adam’s touches usually were, gentle and full of genuine affection but nothing beyond that. Ben’s heart ached for how things had been two minutes ago.

“Sleep well.”

Ben replied and they both hurried to slip into their rooms before the elevator could come to a halt.

Once inside, Ben stood still for a few minutes and waited for his erection to die down. When it didn’t, he headed into the bathroom anyway where he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He was a mess: face red, eyes bloodshot and a ring of angry red wrapped around his throat with a fresh hickey on top of that. Good thing that Ben had brought a turtleneck.

He wondered what Adam was doing right now. Brushing it off, probably, so Ben tried to do the same.

He didn’t touch himself in the shower, fixed his hair, put on his turtleneck and started to upload the final day’s footage into the cloud. When he finished that, he flopped on the bed, turned on the TV and put on something mind-numbing, already knowing that he’d have very little chance of finding sleep after all of that.

How the hell was he supposed to sleep looking like that with the taste of Adam’s cum still all over the inside of his mouth? Ben got up again to brush his teeth and avoided to look at himself in the mirror while he did that.

If only…. he shook his head and forced the thought back down. No ifs.

Ben got back into bed and turned off the lights but kept the TV running for some white noise. He turned to his side and was about to put his glasses on the nightstand to try to sleep anyway when his phone lit up with a text. He read Adam’s name, stared for a few seconds and picked the phone up, uncertain what to do with it. He was about to put it back down, display facing the wood when it started to vibrate in his hands. Adam was calling and Ben was too paralyzed to pick up or decline, so he just let it ring until the call timed out.

Not two minutes later there was a knock on the door and Ben felt very queasy all of a sudden but he knew that there was no other option than getting out of bed and opening the door. It wasn’t like this whole mess wasn’t his own fault. He swallowed hard as he walked up to the door and lingered before opening it.

Adam would figure it out. It was Adam after all and Adam wouldn’t be Adam if he couldn’t figure it out. Right?