Chapter Text
Chapter 8
September 1993: Day Nine
You were thankful for the cover of night, to hide your slowly creeping shame. Now that it was the middle of the night, it was much colder than it would have been during the day. Your skin pebbles with goosebumps, but you couldn’t tell what it was from anymore. The cold? Anxiety?
When you opened the van’s passenger side door, there was an audible squeak, nearly sounding like it was gonna snap off its hinges.
“Oh shit, did I break it?” You froze, looking at Sal who was already sitting in the driver's seat. Larry and Ash were both still tipsy and Todd not Neil had their learners permit yet. So that left you, who was still drunk and Sal who hadn’t had a sip of anything the entire night.
He leans over the console, making eye contact with you. His eyes looked confused for a moment, but he quickly went back into reality. “Huh? Oh, no, it just does that sometimes.”
Once he’d straightened out the vehicle and shifted into drive, he pulled off of the street crowded with cars and onto the main road. The streets were dark, quiet. Granted it was about one in the morning so it made sense. It was serene and almost peaceful.
You leaned out the window, beginning to count the tall streetlights on the sides of the road as they passed by.
The car was silent. Only the hushed cries of cannibal corpse playing on the radio. You could see Sal bobbing his head next to you, but his hands were gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles were bleached white.
The engine rumbled beneath you like always. It felt nice, sending what felt like electricity throughout up your soft thighs to settle in your lower stomach.
Moments like these didn't feel real in the grand scheme of things. Nothing around you mattered, in fact nothing in the world mattered because everything was temporary.
Sal, the usually silent one during cat rides, said something next to you. It shook you out of your thoughts and brought you back into your seat. “Sorry, what?”
“I was just making sure you were good,” His eyes narrowed at you from underneath his mask. “I don’t wanna watch you jump out the window, ya know?”
You took a moment to look at him. Really look at him. His rings glimmered around his fingers, matching the ones in his ears. If you looked long enough at his hands, you could see the blue and green veins there.
The casual spread of his thighs and his scraped up knees underneath his ripped up jeans—most likely his own doing. His slow, heaving breaths that caused his loose hair to be disturbed every time he inhaled.
You pursed your lips, feeling the heat rise to your face as you turned towards the open window. You needed to sober up and fast. “What are you doing?” You barely heard him over the harsh whistling wind in your ears. You pulled your weight onto the open window, holding onto the handlebar for stability. Your hair slapped you in your face, as you turned your head to watch the road. You tried to breathe in, but the wind pressure was so intense that you found it hard to inhale.
“You’re going to get you head taken over by a pole,” Sal yelled from inside, something close to concern in his voice.
“No, I’m not,” You yelled back to him, tightening your grip on the handlebar and leaning further out the window. “Drive faster!”
“You shouldn’t—“
“Please!”
Silence, even if just for a moment. But he obeyed. Like clockwork, the wheels started rotating faster.
Your eyes stung with tears. You leaned your head back, finding bliss in observing the stars from this angle. There was nothing better than this. Pure freedom.
You felt the grasp of a desperate hand on your thigh. It almost caused you to lose focus, the hardness of his rings pressing into you through your pants. It was for your safety but mostly for his sanity.
You knew he wouldn’t be able to catch you, you’d fall too fast. You don’t think he knew that though.
“..ar..”
“What?!”
“CAR!”
He was right. You jolt as you spot the quickly approaching headlights, ducking back into your seat and flopping back onto your ass.
You couldn’t help but laugh, breathless and maniacal. You felt delightfully giddy and dizzy. Sal removed his hand from your leg the second you were settled in your seat.
When the car passed, he glanced over at you, eyes wide underneath his mask. “You’re gonna get yourself killed.”
The adrenaline coursing through you made your head spin. You wanted to go back out, but you also felt like if you did, you would pass out from trying to hold your breath again.
“Are you feeling better now?” Ash slurs from the row directly behind you, eyes soft with worry and affection.
You nodded quietly, slouching down in the passenger seat. “I just needed to stabilize myself.” She didn’t respond, and only let out a noise of acknowledgement.
Todd was in the back row with his boyfriend, talking in hushed tones. You don’t know how he joined your group, maybe he had his own ride and ditched it to hang with his boyfriend.
Larry was sitting behind Sal, staring wordlessly out the dark window view. He looked troubled, deeply angry and jittery. He’d been quiet ever since you drove off.
There wasn’t any loud screaming, no one was clambering over each other like usual. It was just, quiet.
You frown a little, perturbed. “Where are we going by the by,” You asked Sal finally, running your fingers across your tender scalp.
“Well we were going to go home and hang out at Larry’s apartment.” Sal explained, glancing at you briefly but looking back at the empty road ahead. “But I have a better idea.”
~
Your toes felt like they would freeze off the longer you stood on the dock. You had previously expressed anxiety about walking barefoot on an old wooden deck but it was surprisingly well kept. No real risk of splinters.
Maybe you were crazy. And that’s why you wanted to jump into that ice cold lake right now. Clothes and all. It would put you in a very bad position since you didn’t have a change of clothes, however, it would be fun.
You glanced over towards the treeline, eyes soft with consideration. Todd and Neil had run off into the woods together half an hour ago. It wasn’t inherently sexual, actually it was quite sweet. They had the intent to find a place to sit alone together on one of the various blankets they had in the back and watch the stars.
You hadn’t heard the approaching footsteps until they started to pick up pace rapidly. Somehow, without accidentally taking out yourself, you ducked out the way, just barely avoiding Larry’s attempt to push you into the lake.
Resulting in him going face first by himself with a rather girly scream. It wasn’t long before Ashley followed, giggling maniacally as she leapt very gracefully into the lake and totally did not belly flop.
You laughed. A deep, keening belly laugh.
“Good reflexes,” Sal came up next to you, standing at a distance by your side. “How did you know when to move?”
You shrugged as you watched the two resurface. Larry flipped you off, and you returned the action with a grin. “He runs very loudly.” His dark hair looked like seaweed in this light.
Either that or it actually was seaweed. Sal nods his head, hands coming to grasp at the ends of his shirt. “Ain’t that the truth.”
You watched in muted silence as the fabric came over his head of deep blue hair. Your tongue felt heavy in your mouth as you took in his frame. It only got heavier as his jeans followed.
He had a stick and poke tattoo on his leg, a cheeseburger with a speech bubble above its head. You couldn’t tell what it said, not in this light. It was amusing though
“You coming in with us?” He asks, looking at you curiously. His fingers glimmered in the moonlight, still wearing his rings. “You don’t have to.”
“I’m not wearing a bra.” Your voice was strained as you tried to avoid looking below his neck. But you wanted to very badly. “Unless that was the angle, Fisher?”
He snorted, rolling his eyes and looking towards the lake once again. He didn’t jump in though, and you realized that he was standing there waiting for you but not looking for your own privacy.
You wiggled off the shirt you were wearing, leaving you in my pants. It took a second, but you managed to get them down, skin pebbling with goosebumps as your boots and socks followed.
Your top was naked, but you were still wearing your underwear. You didn’t feel embarrassed in your own skin, but you felt a little angry at yourself for not wearing any undergarments besides your panties.
Sal still wasn’t looking at you, instead watching Ash and Larry trying to drown each other. But you noticed immediately how his hand was hovering in the air, waiting. You gently grasped it, following his lead as you stepped several paces back before taking off running across the dock. Somehow, you hit the water first, but he followed soon after.
You’re enveloped in nothing but a cold chill. Your body felt numb, and you felt your skin practically turn into ice the longer you were there under the surface. Something about it felt familiar, and you let yourself be carried by the water naturally.
It was a happy feeling, enveloped in your own brief isolated silence.
Then you resurfaced, your previously styled hair now clinging to your forehead. You felt the chill of early morning air take over you, as you looked over at the group.
Larry and Sal were doing horseplay, shoving one another. Ash was peacefully floating a few yards away, belly to the sky. Once you knew no one was looking for you, you quietly sank back below the surface.
You were at peace, even if just for a little while longer. You thought about home, your garden that most likely had crumbled into dust without you or your mother’s help. You were happy to have nonleafy friends, but a small part of you wished you were nine years old again, back home with your mom.
You could feel the need for breath causing your lungs to ach the longer you floated there. It was scary, but comforting. A sign that you were alive.
You surface again, leaving your cold comfort behind. You took in a hungry gulp of air before shaking your soaking wet hair like a soggy poodle.
“Hey,” You look up from the abyss, eyelashes heavy with water. Larry was a few inches away, eyes narrowed suspiciously. “You okay?”
You offered no words, instead lifting a thumbs up. He seemed like he was going to call BS but accepted the answer with a nod. His sour mood seemed to be gone now. Same old Larry.
Thankful that he was feeling better, you clamored out of the lake, dripping wet as you planted your moist butt on the wooden dock.
The chill instantly took hold, leaving you shivering on the old wood. Maybe coming here in the middle of fall wasn’t the best idea, but you only learn through living as your mother used to say.
The world was quiet, but you knew it wouldn’t last long. Your head was gently pounding and your toes were slowly going numb inside the water.
Your attention was snagged as Sal climbed out of the lake. You got anxious the longer you stared, so you didn’t, looking instead at the dark sky.
Sleep and you have never really had the best relationship. You spent most nights staring out the window until you became tired enough to pass out for a few hours. But right now you are struggling to keep yourself awake.
“Here.” Your focus is on Sal again as he offered you a towel, as well as his hand to you. You took both of them, stumbling slightly until you eventually found your footing.
You walked off back to the van, hand in hand, wrapped up in your respective fluffy towels. Even with the towel, you were absolutely chilled to the bone.
By the time the car’s heat was blasting around you, your nose was running.
You don’t know how you ended up in the backseat, since you started in the front, but eventually you ended up with your nearly naked body smushed up Sal’s for warmth. You were both shivering, but to you, his skin felt like it was burning.
The silence that stretched between you was nerve wracking but the cover of night allowed you to be as nervous as possible. From how rigid both of your bodies were, you could tell that he was just as anxious as you were. Even if neither of you would admit it.
“How are you feeling?” Sal’s voice was low, the warmth of his breath going downwards to the bottom of the mask. You knew it did because you felt it hit your chest. “You’re not going to barf on me, are you?”
You knew he was poking fun but gave him a look anyway. Well as much as a look as you could muster in the dark and without actually being upset. He seemed to sense your glare anyways, because his laugh echoed inside the car.
The longer you both sat there, the wetter your towels were getting, which was making you colder than being in the lake itself. You shrugged until yours was on the seat next to you, using your goosebump ridden arms to hide your modesty.
Sal either didn’t notice or didn’t say anything. You were betting on the former, because you were sitting on his blind side. “Thank you for being there.” Your voice was still hoarse but much clearer than it was earlier. No more slurring. “You and everyone else, obviously.”
“We can't let anything happen to one of our own.” You shiver as his ring-clad fingers carefully grasp your chin, mushing you around. But the way he talked showed something deeper. More protective.
“Worried about me, Fisher?” Your voice cracked, neck hot at the sudden consciousness of how close you were. Your legs were in their usual spot, but it was mostly your thighs on top of his. You could feel his naked side press against your bicep and his own arm resting next to your back.
His tone was soft as he replied, voice stirring your stomach into a twisty turny mess. “Why wouldn’t I be?” You shuddered, the darkness leaving your imagination to run wild with the possibilities of where this conversation was going to go.
You didn't reply, hands moving from your shoulders to his, holding onto him tightly. He seemed to take your curious touches as an invitation. His hand abandoned the seat, instead finding its home on my waist.
The smell of laundry detergent was gone but as always he smelled like mint. You let out a soft whine, selfishly searching for that addictive smell and bumping your noses together. Well, your nose and his mask’s nose.
You both chuckled, his hand trailing from your waist to your hips. You shudder as a thrill spreads down your body, settling between your thighs.
“So what now, besides freezing to death waiting for them?” Sal proposed. He sounded more nervous for this part, as if genuinely worried. But it wasn’t for any potential freezing, it was something else entirely.
The more feral part of you yearned to say what was on your mind, the good and the… deeply provocative. But you also want to milk this as far as you could. “I dunno, I might like being an icicle.”
The air around you seemed to still, reminding you of your time in his bedroom. But this time, there was more of an underlying intent there. Before it was a cautious curiosity. This was something much hungrier.
“Take it off.”
“What?” It came out like a whimper.
“...Take off my prosthetic.”
The sickness of your inebriation was gone, leaving you a gooey mess of teenage hormones. You were definitely sober enough to understand basic instruction but also tipsy enough to want to do what you wanted.
You purse your lips, shifting your body until you are able to swing your leg over his thighs. You could hear him let out a shuddering gasp of your name underneath you. You smirked quietly, crouching on your knees over his eagerly waiting lap
His fingers shook as he held your hips, his short nails still somehow digging into your skin. It forces you to focus instead of melting into his embrace. “Are you sure..?”
Cautiously you reached up, gliding your fingers from his chest up the curve of his neck. “I guess… It’s not like you can really see me…” His hair was soft underneath your fingers and you almost found yourself back in a quiet hair fussing daze,
You shook your head, you could worry about his hair later.
Even if you couldn’t see all that well, you could still feel him shaking. He was as terrified as you were. But you were definitely scared for different reasons.
His mask fell to your lap, and you let out a soft gasp as instantly he pushed his forehead against yours. His breathing hitched, grip on your waist tightening as he pulled you closer.
“You’re… really warm...” Something about that made you sheepish. At the same time, you were bold, pinning him in place as you finally sat down on his waist.
He was shivering as you cupped his face, his fingers aimlessly playing with the soft curve of your waist. You started from the top, working your way down slowly.
You could feel a large scar on his right cheek and followed it down with your finger until it stopped at his top lip—what was left of it anyway. Your fingers grazed something solid and you realized quickly that the scar split his upper lip open on the right side, leaving some of his upper teeth exposed.
Tinier scars littered his face, and with a careful confirmation, You could feel how the cartilage in his nose was almost completely gone and your heart crooned inside your chest.
His face was burning, so you knew he was blushing but his shaking seemed to get more intense the more you explored him. You couldn’t see his expression from this angle, but if you leaned back he could see yours from the moonlight.
“Do you… still want me to kiss you…?” He was gentle, as if he would break you if he held you too hard. You let out a shuddering breath at the desperation in his voice, hands coming up to grasp weakly at his hair once more.
Despite your fear of being found in a compromising position like this, you felt yourself begin to nod. Sal caressed your waist, coaxing your body to mesh with his own. “Yes ple—”
You barely finished your thought before feeling his lips press into yours. Your fists opened and closed in his hair and your eyes grew wider than before.
Seeming to sense your surprise, he pulled back slightly but you didn’t let him get far. Your lips followed his, and he grunted as he felt your fingers pulling him closer. It was clumsy and his lips were chapped. But you can’t imagine you were any more pleasant, having puked your lunch out less than two hours ago
His soft kisses moved from your mouth to your jaw, passing quickly onto your neck. He wasn’t nearly as gentle here as the kisses on your lips were. These were with purpose.
"You taste like honeysuckle," He mouthed at your skin, holding you in place as you gasped out. It was soft and slow but the intent was there, stirring your brain into mush.
"Don't..." You murmured, almost in a daze. Sal draws back immediately, breathing slow but heavy against your own heaving chest.
Softly, he pressed his forehead against yours once more, rubbing gentle circles into your hips.
"Do you want me to stop?"
"No," You pulled him closer than before, a low whine falling from your lips, "Don't stop." The silence was almost deafening, the sound of your breathings in pure synchronization with one another.
Your fingers find his hair and this time you kiss him. He responded with a spine-tingling groan, his hands moving from your hips to your exposed outer thighs. His nails dug into the sensitive skin, and you let out a whine against his mouth.
You didn’t know how long you were back there, a blur of quiet conversations and shy kisses. But by the time your friends had sleepily trudged their butts back to the car, you were both dressed and in the front seat, sharing a cigarette.
Your face was hot, lips swollen and gluttonous for more but happily buzzing from what you were given. It was awkward and scary. Nearly perfect.