Chapter Text
If one hooked Taehyung up to a lie detector, they would discover that he was not sick. Well, not physically at least. If you asked Seokjin, however, he would ask if Taehyung had recovered from whatever bug he was fighting.
Of course, Seokjin, being a smart man, probably knows that Taehyung isn’t actually sick, but it's an easy excuse to avoid whatever tension is simmering under the surface.
Well, after that evening encounter, could it really be called simmering? The volcano had exploded, figuratively and literally. Taehyung can still remember the feeling of Seokjin’s cum running down his throat. It had been like a dream. Something he had given up on fantasizing about over a decade ago when his sister and Seokjin had said their wedding vows. But now, he has crossed a line, one that is impossible to ignore.
Sure, Seokjin had seemed to enjoy what they did, but Taehyung knows how easy it is when your body takes over. In those moments, it’s hard to say no. It’s in the space and time that follows that realization sets in. Taehyung couldn’t be present for that.
“What have I done?” he groans, slumping further into the couch.
“Tae,” Jimin rolls his eyes as he settles down beside his friend. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“That’s easy for you to say,” Taehyung huffs. “You’re not the one who sucked your brother-in-law’s dick only days after he told you he’s strugging with his sexuality. Oh, and not to mention….” Taehyung shoots his eyes in Jimin’s direction. “His wife died eight months ago.”
“It was more than days, Tae,” Jimin attempts to reason with him. “It was like a month of him not rejecting any of your relentless flirting. And, you said he didn’t even try to push you away that night, right?”
“I guess…” Taehyung lets his eyes close.
“You can’t avoid the girls forever, Tae,” Jimin says in a soft voice.
“Why not?” Taehyung huffs back.
Jimin reaches out and pushes back Taehyung’s bangs with his palm. “Because you adore them. And they adore you.”
“True.”
“And you’re in love with their father.”
“UGHHHHH!” Taehyung groans loudly, covering his eyes with his hands. “I’m the worst brother ever.”
“Stop, Tae.” Jimin’s voice is more stern than it has been. “Somi is gone. I know both you and Seokjin loved her, but she’s not here anymore. You and Seokjin were two of the most important people in her life. Why would she not want you to be happy?”
“Would you want your brother to hook up with your fiance if you died?” Taehyung asks with a glare.
“Honestly? Yes. If it means they are both happy, then yes.”
Taehyung is silent as he contemplates what Jimin said.
“That note...from your sister…I think it said everything.”
Taehyung wants to correct his friend, to say that he’s already accepted that his feelings for Seokjin are here to stay, that he doesn’t feel guilty for what happened. But he doesn’t want anyone to think he’s heartless.
No, his real struggle isn’t guilt.
It’s fear.
What if he pushed Seokjin too hard too fast? What if he completely and totally ruined everything they were growing towards? That’s why he ran before he could see Seokjin’s eyes. If that would be the only time he ever got to be with Seokjin that way, then he didn’t want the memory to be marred by fear or worry or, worse of all, hate. So he ran. Although, in hindsight, a memory marked by cowardace probably isn’t any better for future fantasy purposes.
He hadn’t planned to tell Seokjin he was sick the following day. Definitely hadn’t planned on his fake illness lasting two days. And then three. Until an entire week had passed. But the more days that went by, the harder it was to face the man.
When Monday morning of the following week arrives, however, he knows he can no longer avoid reality. So, he clothes himself in courage and designer clothing and heads over to the Kim mansion.
He is quickly greeted by an excited Yumi and Mihi upon his arrival. Both girls ask him several times if he is feeling better, and that’s when guilt does make its appearance. He assures them he is fine and tells them to head off to the kitchen where Mrs. Choi is currently calling their name.
After kicking off his shoes, he opens the closet to hang up his jacket.
“You’re alive.”
Taehyung freezes. His muscles tense and his heart starts racing. He imagines his survival brain could easily take over at this time, push him into fight, flight or freeze. That will get him nowhere though. So he turns slowly, pastes a smile on his face.
“Good Morning,” he greets.
“Mmm,” is Seokjin’s reply as he steps off the bottom step of the tall staircase and walks towards Taehyung.
“Uh…” Taehyung looks around nervously. “How are the girls?”
Seokjin takes another step closer, stopping about two feet from Taehyung. “That seems like something you can ask them yourself.”
“Oh uh…yeah.”
“Must have been quite the illness you had.” Seokjin keeps his gaze heavy on Taehyung as if challenging him. “To be out as long as you were.”
“Sometimes it just hits you,” Taehyung chuckles, but he’s sure Seokjin can hear the shake in his voice.
“It came on really fast too.”
“Huh?” Taehyung looks at Seokjin with a raised brow.
“I mean,” Seokjin closes the gap between them even more, now less than a foot between their chests. “One minute you had my cock down your throat, and the next…bedridden. He pouts slightly before adding sarcastically, “What a shame.”
And then, he backs away as if nothing happened, picks up the newspaper from the front table and starts walking out of the room towards the kitchen. “Breakfast is getting cold.”
It takes Taehyung almost a full minute to convince his legs to move. He just stares at the space where Seokjin was just standing. Of all the scenarios he had allowed to play through his mind in anticipation of this moment, that outcome wasn’t even an option.
Two things are certain though. One, Seokjin knows Taehyung wasn’t sick, that he was avoiding him instead. Two, Seokjin is angry.
~~~~
Sitting at the eat-in kitchen table, one leg crossed over the other, Seokjin pretends to read the newspaper when Taehyung finally appears. The girls fight over where their Uncle is going to sit for far too long, while neither Taehyung or Mrs. Choi step in.
“Sit down and eat now,” Seokjin commands, not looking up from the paper but making it clear to the girls that he’s had enough. He can almost hear them both pout.
Mrs. Choi places a plate of food in front of him and he thanks her as he puts his paper aside. He avoids eye contact with anyone at the table. Silence envelopes them all. Even the girls seem to sense the awkwardness.
“Daddy,” Mihi speaks after a while.
“Hmm?”
“Can we go to the pet store when you’re done work today?”
He looks up at her. “Pet store?”
“You said we could talk about getting a puppy,” Yumi enters the conversation. “Remember?”
“I do remember,” he says with a slight frown. “But since when does ‘talking about it’ equal going to a pet store.”
“Sometimes it helps to see the puppies,” Mihi explains as if it’s obvious logic.
“Is that so?” Seokjin cocks one of his eyebrows. “I’ve never heard of this theory.”
“It makes sense to me,” Yumi answers. “Don’t you think it makes sense, Uncle Taetae?”
All three sets of eyes snap to Taehyung, watching him for his answer.
“Uh…” Taehyung looks at both girls first, and then his gaze meets Seokjin’s. He searches his eyes, perhaps trying to find an answer. “I think that this is a conversation between you and your Dad.”
“Uncle Taeeeee,” Yumi whines, her eyes forming their signature puppy dog look.
“Kim Yumi,” Seokjin states firmly. “Whining won’t get you anything. Understand?”
She pouts slightly but nods before turning her attention back to her food. Mihi looks at her sister and then back at Seokjin. He feels slightly guilty, but he’s learned that’s part of parenting. No one wants to have to say no or correct their children, but it’s important and necessary. So he swallows back the feeling and returns to eating.
“Daddy,” Mihi tries again after a few minutes. “Can we talk about a puppy soon?”
Seokjin can’t fault her for the request. She’s persistant, but she also is wise beyond her years, already undertanding how to navigate difficult and emotional situations. He could learn from her at times.
“Today is Monday. Tonight you have dance. So your focus right now needs to be school and dance. Tomorrow night after dinner, we can discuss.”
“Thank you, Daddy!” Mihi exclaims, sliding off her chair and launching into Seokjin’s lap to land a kiss on his cheek.
“I said ‘talk about it,’” he chuckles.
“That’s okay.” Yumi smiles brightly. “It’s a start.”
Once breakfast is complete, the girls go to their rooms to get changed for the day with the promise that Seokjin will be up shortly to do their hair. Mrs. Choi is off doing some chores, which leaves him alone with Taehyung.
The air feels heavy. It’s a mixture of emotions, what he’s experiencing here with Taehyung, what he’s been dealing with in the past week. Taehyung had caught him completely off guard in his office that night, but he would be lying if he said it wasn’t better than even his fantasies up to that point. Taehyung hadn’t lied when he said he was really good at sucking him off. And truthfully, Seokjin had enjoyed it. In fact, he had been thinking of what it would be like to do more, go further, until suddenly Taehyung was apologizing and running out of the room before Seokjin could even get the blindfold off.
At first, he had been confused, but that confusion had quickly turned to worry. Maybe he had done something wrong. He’d never been with a man before, so maybe there was big faux pas he commited that he didn’t know about.
When Taehyung didn’t show up the next day, he had started to worry that maybe the younger thought he had offended Seokjin, or done something he shouldn’t have.
But when one day turned to one week, Seokjin felt angry. And that anger is still there, simmering under the surface. Taehyung knew what Seokjin was going through, the struggle he was having with Somi’s death, being attracted to her brother, and his sexuality in general. What happened between them might have just been a blow job for Taehyung, but for Seokjin, it was a first. A first that he had both fretted and fantasized about. And Taehyung knew all that. So the fact that he just got up and left Seokjin to figure it out on his own, to sort through his feelings and emotions all by himself, it didn’t make Seokjin feel good.
He had planned to act non-chalant. To pretend nothing had happened between them. Managing his emotions and reactions under pressure is what had earned him the title of ‘Ice Prince’ in the media, something he had always exceled at. That had been his gameplan for when Taehyung arrived.
But the second he saw his handsome face, memories of that night came rushing back, specifically Taehyung leaving. The anger bubbled back up, like a volcano threatening to overflow. He couldn’t help himself, had to make some sort of jab to let Taehyung know that he was mad.
Since then, Taehyung has been uncharacteristically quiet.
Until now.
“Seokjin,” he starts, his voice quieter than usual. “About that night, I…I’m sor”
“No.” Seokjin’s voice is firm. He holds up his hand at the same time. “You won’t apologize again. In fact, you won’t talk about that night again.” Seokjin looks at Taehyung with darkness in his eyes. “You left me in my office blindfolded with my cock out while you ran off and disappeared for a week. You knew what that experience was for me, and you left me. For a week. So no, you will not apologize because I will not accept it. And we won’t be speaking of that ever again.”
And with that, Seokjin stands up and leaves the room.