Chapter Text
It was an absolutely stunning, clear-blue and full sunshine morning. The kind where the birds sang and flowers smelled sweeter. Selphie absolutely loved the end of summer. It was still warm enough to spend the day outside – picnics, BBQs, swimming – but you could sense a change in the air with autumn coming. Autumn was a time for colourful walks and cosying up with hot chocolate. But today it’d be an iced coffee.
OH YEAH!
She weaved through staff, students and SeeD as she skipped along to the cafeteria. The bitter smell of coffee hit her straight away.
Yesssss! I LOVE this smell! Oh, maybe later, before my next meeting, I can grab a doughnut or something. I especially like those ones with the pink frosting and the sprinkles. They don’t taste of anything other than sugar, but they look so PRETTY! I can get Irvine one too. Oh right. He’s not here.
Mid-morning was one of the quieter periods in the cafeteria and especially so when it was summer break. Most people still at Garden had either bought their breakfast and coffees-
Oh! There he is! Nida, Nida, Nida. Ensign Nida. What’s an ‘Ensign’ again? Ahh I don’t know. I’m gonna call him Nida Calrisan Navigation Officer Extraordinaire! I don’t know if he is that, but it sounds pretty cool. And he’s the only one so he must be ‘extraordinaire’ at something. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be one at all.
Nida was sitting alone at a table, drawing something on a large sheet of paper with a worn book and stationery equipment laid out in front of him. Her own notepad and pen clattered on the table as she dropped them while sitting down. Nida pulled his headphones down and started to close the book as they said their hellos.
“Oh wow, stars!” Selphie exclaimed, as she looked at what he was doing.
Across the table was a large sheet of light-blue paper with grid lines covering the entire surface. Pencil dots of varying sizes and colours were scattered across, with lines connecting some of them. Here and there, Selphie could make out marks which had been rubbed out. Notations were etched in the margins. Nida packed away his pencils, rulers and protractor. As he picked up his coffee cup in the top-right corner, the paper automatically began to roll itself like it was one of those ancient scrolls.
Epic!
“Sorry, I didn’t realise the time,” Nida said. “I’m impressed you knew what I was doing, though.”
Yes, that’s me! Selphie Tilmitt, multi-layered and super interesting SeeD. Full of surprises!
Selphie grinned at him. “I opted to take an astronomy class at Trabia for a semester. Absolutely loved it. Though I don’t remember too much now. I didn’t know you were into that sort of thing. Oh! And I went into space once!” she added suddenly, eyes brightening. “With Squall and Ellone. You’d think that would’ve made me an expert on constellations or whatever, but nope. Totally blanked on most of it. Too busy trying not to float into a wall.”
Nida froze halfway through zipping his pencil case.
I hope he thinks I’m cool!
“Right. That… actually checks out,” he said after a beat, half-smiling. “I remember hearing about it. I figured the reports were exaggerated.”
“Nope! Totally real.” Selphie pushed herself off the chair slightly, miming the slow, drifting movement through outer space. “Zero gravity. Freaky. Wouldn’t recommend unless you like seeing your lunch again.”
Nida laughed, shaking his head as he swapped his pristine star chart for a dog-eared notepad. “Guess I’ll stick to sea level, then.”
Selphie plopped back down in her seat. “Your loss! The view was amazing, though.”
He gave her a small smile. “Yeah. I’ll bet.”
Yes! He thinks I’m funny, not weird. Great start!
She couldn’t help but smile. This was the first time she’d ever properly spoken to him outside of saying hello if she ever went to see Squall on the bridge, or passed him in the halls. Both were rare as she hadn’t been at Balamb Garden much recently. Unlike the rest of her group, she was still a SeeD in the field. Still went out on missions. She loved it, except she did miss Irvine like crazy when she was away.
Irvine…where ARE you?
“Oh my Hyne!” she suddenly exclaimed, happy to have found a distraction. “I love that band!”
He looked down to where she was pointing. His T-shirt. No need for uniform today as it was his day off. Instead, he was wearing the T-shirt of the band, Dollet Dukes. An old punk rock band who’d had a few major hits decades ago. Selphie loved them. She loved all music.
“Oh…yeah,” his hand moved to his chest, partially covering the logo. “I’ve recently started listening to them.”
“Indigo Nights is my favourite song. I could listen to it on repeat.
Under indigo nights, where the stars meet the sea
We were young and we were reckless,
We were wild and we were free
Now I'm chasing distant memories
In the rear-view mirror's light –“
“-still searching for that feeling under indigo nights.”
Nida tried to harmonise, though their combined effort was more enthusiasm than accuracy. Heads turned throughout the cafeteria. Some amused, others annoyed. They collapsed into laughter, not caring what anyone else thought.
“Yeah, that’s a good song. I quite like Junction Point too.”
“Ohhhh Junction Point! That’s a great one! I love the lyrics. All about loving someone who is totally using you. And it rocks. HARD. You have excellent taste.”
Selphie beamed but saw his eyes drop.
Oh no. I hope I’m not being too much. I’m definitely being too much. I’m ALWAYS too much.
“Right!” She dramatically clicked her pen and threw her book open to a random page. “Let’s talk Trabia.”
He smirked at her. “Yeah, let’s do it. So, I was thinking of doing something to say thank you to the engineers from Fisherman’s Horizon. Show them we appreciate their hard work.”
OHHHH YESSSSS NIIIIDDDAAAAA! I LOVE THIS IDEA! That crew are super awesome. I talk to them all the time when I’m there, helping with the reconstruction. I mean, they usually say they're too busy to talk to me, but they appreciate my cookies.
“Yes, I love that! But-but, it has to be meaningful, right? Not just a plaque—I mean we could do a plaque, plaques are nice, people like plaques—but something that shows we really value their time. Oh! Something personal but also—wait, it needs to be big enough that they're like 'wow this is so cool' but not so dramatic that it's weird, you know?”
There was a pause. Selphie blushed slightly as she realised Nida was staring at her.
Oh no, he DOES think I’m weird. I’ve literally verbally vomited on him.
He started to speak, slower than usual at first. “Yeah…yeah... A plaque would be cool to be fair. But on that ‘personal’ point, I was thinking care packages but personalise them. Maybe include food items or things they’ve enjoyed since being in Trabia.”
That is SO…great. Keep it composed, Tilmitt.
The tapping of feet under the table told a different story. “Care packages are such a great idea. And Trabian cuisine is awesome. I’m sure they’ve got some new favourite snacks now. I’m going back out there in a week, I can see what I can find out.”
Nida’s expression brightened. “I actually know the guy in charge of the crew. He helped me learn how to pilot Garden after we crashed there. I’ll contact him.”
She looked on as Nida started writing in his book. Her own was just a blank page. She felt like she should write something too but wasn’t sure what. Snack ideas? Decoration ideas? They could definitely decorate the boxes, really make them individual. She couldn’t wait to give these to the FH guys. They were pretty aloof but awesome, and they were definitely going to love this.
But I’ve barely seen Irvine since I got back. Where is he? He just goes off like that with some kind of secret mission and no word on when he’ll be back. Just that he will be. And I’ve not heard from him at all. Is it dangerous? Is he OK? Is he hurt? Is he missing me? Cid says he’ll tell me more when he can but surely, I can be let in on whatever it is. I can keep a secret. But if I need to keep it a secret then it must be dangerous. And he didn’t take Exeter with him. It’s still in its case. If it was a dangerous mission, why wouldn’t he take it? Where is it? I can’t cope.
She clicked her pen a few more times and started to tap it on her book.
“It’s nice you kept in touch,” she leaned across, closer to Nida.
He raised his head and met her gaze. “Yeah, they’re a nice bunch. I speak to them sometimes if I can’t figure out an issue with our navigation systems. Would be nice to go back and see them at some point.”
His gaze drifted slightly. Selphie noted how he looked more thoughtful. “Well, let’s get this sorted and maybe you’ll be invited for a visit.”
They worked through logistics for another ten minutes. Budget considerations, timeline, who else might want to contribute. Selphie started to sketch out a sample package design and then said casually,
“They’re touring soon.”
Nida looked at her, confused. “Who?”
“The Dollet Dukes. I think they’re going to play at the theatre in Balamb Hotel. You should go see them.”
He stopped writing. “Oh? Yeah, I might look into it.”
Selphie slammed her pencil down. “What? You ‘might’? You WILL! Raze Holloway is a lyricist genius who needs to be experienced live, and Axl Strand is an absolute god on the guitar.” She pretended to shred thin air.
Nida was laughing but something in his eyes felt off. Had she hit a nerve? Ohhh…hadn’t Rinoa mentioned she’d spoken to him yesterday at the infirmary? Lately most people went to the infirmary for…yeah…and this was an old band he was suddenly listening to…
“Ahhh Nida, I’m such an idiot! Forget I said anything.”
His eyes shot back up to her. “Why? I’m just not sure I want to be in a mosh pit with a bunch of old guys, that’s all. Headbanging with a crowd of Cids isn’t really my scene.”
Selphie nodded, she got it. Understood what he wasn’t saying. It wasn’t easy. OK, time to change the subject.
“Are you having therapy?”
WHAT? That was the complete opposite of what I wanted to say. Stupid, stupid brain!
Nida put his pen down and cleared his throat. There was a long pause.
“Yeah. I am,” he said finally. “I’ve been seeing Dr. Kadowaki. Her memory loss program. It’s…a lot.”
Selphie’s expression shifted but it was one of recognition instead of pity. “Tell me about it,” she sighed. “I started going just before I was assigned to Trabia.”
“Really?” Nida looked genuinely surprised. “How did you find it?”
“Weird,” she admitted. “It’s like pulling on a never-ending rope. Some memories I’m glad to have back, but others…” she trailed off, fingers stilling on her pen.
“Yeah.” He nodded slowly. “Makes sense. When you uncover one memory you’ve got a whole lot more hiding underneath. At least it’s keeping the doc and Rinoa busy,” he tried for lightness, but it didn’t quite land.
A beat of understanding passed between them. Around them, the cafeteria continued its morning rhythm. The hiss of the coffee machine, scattered conversations, the clatter of dishes. But at their table, the moment felt quieter.
“The Dollet Dukes…” he said after a pause. “I heard one of their songs when I was out in town and it felt so familiar. Turns out my dad was a fan. That’s why I’ve been listening to them. Trying to remember him through music.”
Ah man, I feel both guilty and happy. That’s so sad but also so sweet.
Selphie’s eyes softened. “You know that’s really nice. I’ve always said music is such a healer.”
He shrugged, returning to his notes. Selphie tapped her pen again. Quicker this time. She’d spent the last few evenings listening to songs both she and Irvine liked. Just so she could feel close to him, wherever he was. She hoped he was listening to them too.
If he’s not missing me right now, I’m going to be so angry with him if – no, WHEN he gets back.
“I probably shouldn’t say this,” she said suddenly, “but Quistis said you were kind of…difficult to work with.”
Nida placed his pen down again. His expression half amused. “And here was me, thinking she didn’t even know I existed. You know, Xu also told me you were exhausting. But I’ve quite enjoyed watching your doodles.” He glanced at her page where beside the care package she had drawn stars, hearts and squiggles.
Selphie gasped jokingly and threw a scrunched-up piece of paper at him. “Rude! Though she’s probably not wrong.”
A comfortable silence settled between them. Then Nida said, "Well, this is going way better than advertised."
"Right?" Selphie laughed. "Maybe we're both better than people think." She gathered her notebook. "Hey, I've got to get to a meeting now. Want to grab lunch tomorrow? We could hammer out more details for the packages."
"Yeah, that'd be good." Nida shut his own book and threw it into his bag. "I'll bring my contact list from Fisherman's Horizon."
"Perfect! Meet here at 12?" She was already standing, energy returning in full force.
Smile. Keep smiling. 12 was mine and Irvine’s time. But it’s all good. At least it’s not eating alone.
"Works for me."
As Selphie bounced toward the exit, she turned back briefly. "And Nida? I’d recommend the Tides and Highways album, if you haven’t heard it already."
He smiled and saluted as she walked away, “I’ll check it out."
That was so great. What a nice guy. Him and Irvine would definitely get along. Whenever he gets back.