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I can’t believe I’m doing this, Eddie thought as he buttoned up his shirt. It was a white one, not dissimilar to the many other white button-ups he owned.
I really should think about buying a different coloured shirt.
Honestly, Eddie wasn’t fretting too much about his appearance. It’s not like he wanted to do this anyway. He only agreed because Buck said yes to Ravi, and then gave him those ‘do it for me please’ Buck eyes that Eddie always seemed to cave into.
So that’s how Eddie ended up in his bathroom, smelling of cologne, and wearing one of his nicer shirts. Because Eddie was going to a singles night.
Jesus Christ.
He had never been that great on dates - or with women in general really; he always felt like he was putting on a performance. Even with Shannon, he always felt like he was hiding a part of himself.
This situation is slightly different though, because 1. Eddie doesn’t care about the brief dates he’ll be going on, and 2. he’s just doing it to have a laugh with his friends. At least if something disastrous happens, there’ll be a good story at the end of it. Right?
Eddie sighed, chuckling under his breath. He smiled in the bathroom mirror, checking nothing was in his teeth, and quickly dragged one hand through his hair. That’ll do.
He walked into the living room, picking his phone up from the dining table. He briefly checked his notifications, to see he only had one from Buck:
Buck: See you soon, loverboy 😉.
Eddie laughed to himself, because Buck genuinely seemed excited. The thought of him, Buck, and Ravi, all circling the same candidates was ridiculous to him.
Eddie: I can’t believe we’re doing this.
He opened his messages once more, selecting Christopher’s chat that sat under Buck’s. He typed out a quick message:
Eddie: Have fun with Hen and Karen, don’t stay up too late playing games with Denny. x
Before he could even lock his screen again, Chris had already replied. How on earth do these kids type so fast?
Chris: Have fun being single, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do
Oh this is definitely his child. Eddie shakes his head in amusement and slides his phone into his back pocket. He grabbed his keys from the table and made his way down the road. None of the guys were driving, considering they all might require liquid courage just to make it through the evening. Instead, they were all walking to the restaurant, meeting outside, and entering in together.
Eddie was walking at a brisk pace, just because he hates the feeling of being late. As he turned the corner, he could see a figure in the distance standing by the entrance to the restaurant. He could make out that it was Buck, standing alone. Where was Ravi?
As Eddie got closer and closer, his view of Buck became much clearer. He was wearing a tight, black tank top, a black button-up shirt, and a smart pair of checkered trousers. Eddie couldn’t help but notice the way the tank top was revealing the skin just below Buck’s neck, and the beginning of his muscular peck line. The shirt accompanying it was accentuating his arm muscles extremely well.
God, he could bite them.
Eddie has always known that Buck is attractive, in a guys-can-acknowledge-other-guys kind of way. But recently, and definitely in the glow of the street lights, Eddie hasn’t been able to stop thinking about just how good-looking he really is.
“Eddie?” Buck asks, “you okay?”
Eddie felt his eyes literally snap back into his head. “Y-yeah, you scrub up well Buckley.” He plays the comment off in a jokey way, trying to settle aside anything he might be feeling.
“You don’t look too bad yourself, Eds” Buck replied, his eyes scanning Eddie up and down quickly. Eddie loved when Buck called him Eds. It wasn’t a loving pet name like ‘baby’ or ‘sweetheart’, but it made his heart flutter all the same. Honestly, Buck could call him absolutely anything in that ‘I’m fond of you’ tone and Eddie would keel over. Or kneel down and take him, whatever worked.
He watched as Buck’s eyes scanned him, and then he looked back up at Eddie and smiled - the way Buck always does when he’s being cheeky, his tongue slightly pointing out. Eddie tried not to focus on the tip of Buck’s tongue, because why would he even do that right now, so he just awkwardly smiled and tucked his hands into his pockets.
“Okay then!” Buck said after a minute, rubbing his hands together, “let’s do this thing!”
Eddie scanned his eyes around, but someone was still missing.
“Where’s Ravi?” he questioned, making a confused gesture with his hands.
“Didn’t you see his message?” Buck asked whilst holding out his phone, “he started early.”
Sure enough, Ravi had messaged their ‘single ladies’ group chat - the one that Eddie had to ask Christopher to help him mute - to say that he’d be inside. Eddie peeked through the restaurant window beside them. There was Ravi, making his way around the restaurant, introducing himself to every person he walked past.
“Duty calls, I see,” Eddie laughed.
“Yeah, come on,” Buck said as he held out his hand, “it’s our turn now.”
Eddie drew his gaze down to Buck’s hand, hanging in the air waiting for him to grab it. It’s our turn now. Eddie knew Buck didn’t mean it in that way, but honestly he would love nothing more than to ditch the speed-dating thing all together and just have a beer with Buck at home. That’s what they do every Friday night anyway.
“Right,” Eddie replied whilst grabbing Buck’s hand, “let’s get this over with.”
***
They dropped hands once they entered the restaurant. It probably isn’t the best idea to turn up to a singles night holding someone’s hand. It might give the wrong impression. Not that there’s anything between them to even form an opinion on.
God, what Eddie would do to change that.
The restaurant was packed with a dozen small, circle tables scattered around the centre. It had been decorated with tonnes of warm white fairy lights, and lit candles on the tables added to the romantic atmosphere. Eddie wondered whether you’re expected to bring someone to a table if you ‘click’ with them. He has never really clicked with anyone. Not in the way he does with Buck.
Eddie spent his life trying to find someone to fill the void in him, the voice that always told him he was missing something. It was as if he was one puzzle piece away from finally completing the perfect picture he had always dreamed of. But none of his relationships had done that for him. Shannon was the closest, he loved her so much, but he was never in love with her. He was in love with what they could have been if he denied a part of himself.
But it was different with Buck. He completed Eddie. He entered Eddie’s life and became constant. He promised to have Eddie’s back, and he kept it. Through all the turmoil, the breakdowns, the waves of emotions. In Eddie’s darkest moments, Buck stood as a beacon of light to guide him home.
Buck saved him - both emotionally and physically - in more ways than Eddie could count.
“You okay, Eds?” Buck said softly.
Eddie realised he’d been staring at Buck the whole time. He smiled softly, trying not to draw too much attention to the redness he could feel appearing on his cheeks.
“Yeah, Buck” he lied, “all good.”
Luckily, he didn’t have to keep up the facade for long, because a woman came to greet them at the door.
“Evening gentleman,” she started, “can I have your names?”
“Oh Michelle!” They heard from behind her, a slightly intoxicated Ravi walking over with a red cup in his hand. “This is Eddie [he pointed with his slightly shaky hand], and this [he lightly tapped Buck on the arm with his fist] is Buck, my new partner in crime.”
Buck stared at Ravi with a confused expression, which made Eddie laugh and shake his head.
“Ah! Yes! Eddie and Buck!” Michelle exclaimed, taking a pen out from her pocket. She scribbled down on a piece of paper, and then peeled off two stickers. “These are your name tags, makes it all a little less -uh- awkward. No silly introductions!”
They both retrieve their stickers and stick them to their chest. Eddie can’t help but be drawn to Buck’s chest, where the sticker rests perfectly above his left peck. His highly defined peck.
Do vests always sit this tight on Buck?
It’s a good look for him.
“I think a few people might question why your name is Buck,” Eddie said as he pointed at Buck’s name tag, making them both chuckle.
“At least I have a conversation starter,” Buck wiggled his eyebrows.
Michelle interrupted their conversation to explain the rules. “Okay guys! It’s a singles night, so everyone here is looking for something. To make it easy, there’s coloured cups for whatever you’re looking for; red for fun, blue for serious. Only two colours, so not too much to remember!” Her eyes flicked from Buck to Eddie, and then back again. “We -uh, have tried to accommodate for … everyone, so there are guy and girl candidates.”
She reached over to the platform by the entrance, normally used for booking in reservations, and pulled out a box with two coloured wristbands. “Pink means looking for women, blue means looking for men, and you can wear both if that’s your vibe.”
What about one for ‘just Buck’.
Buck reached out first, grabbing both a pink and a blue wristband. Michelle winked at him playfully. Eddie didn’t like it.
Eddie knew what he wanted to do. What he could do. He could pick up the blue, look at Buck, and wait for his response. An indication that he was curious, that he wanted to know more.
But he didn’t.
He picked pink.
“Riiiight guys,” Ravi said as he came between them, one arm over Buck’s shoulder and one arm over Eddie’s. Eddie couldn’t help but notice that Ravi was wearing both colours too. “Go have some dates, unless you’d rather date each other.”
Both their necks snapped towards Ravi at the same time, briefly making eye contact with each other in the process. Ravi must have sensed the tension because he removed himself from between them and basically pushed them into the ‘dating zone’.
They both shared a glance with each other, unsure where to go next.
Eddie and Buck laughed at how ridiculous this whole thing was. Eddie thought that maybe the night would be bearable if Buck was near him; at least they could save each other if the conversations started to go sideways.
Probably mine more than Buck’s, Eddie thought to himself.
However, amidst all the chaos, Eddie looked up and Buck was gone. He sighed, deciding it was time to gain some liquid courage. He walked to the bar situated at the left of the restaurant, and ordered himself a lager. He felt like dying when the bartender asked what coloured cup he wanted. He’s a nester, so he went for blue.
He felt a motion beside him, and turned his head to see a woman with short, curly, brown hair, and big brown eyes. Her smile was warm and kind, and within seconds she was trying to make conversation.
“Hey!” She exclaimed, a little loud to try and be heard above the commotion, “I’m Ellie.” She pointed at her name tag.
“Nice to meet you, Ellie,” Eddie replied, introducing himself by just pointing at his name, because that’s what it was there for.
She asked Eddie how he was doing, he said he was fine (he wasn’t), and then the conversation turned to work. Ellie explained that she was a teacher (oh god, not again), and Eddie shared that he was a firefighter.
“A firefighter, huh!” she exclaimed, “I bet you’ve seen a lot in your time.”
That’s an understatement, Eddie thought, as he swigged from his cup. Maybe I could avoid talking if I super glued this cup to my mouth.
“Yeah I guess, it comes with the job.”
“Oh for sure!” she replied, a little bit too enthusiastically, “and I bet the ladies love a man in uniform.” She took a drink out of her red cup (why was she talking to him if his cup was blue), taking her straw into her mouth and sucking it whilst looking Eddie straight in the eye.
Get me out of here.
Eddie was desperately trying not to make eye contact with her, so he started scanning the room instead. There were so many people, laughing and joking, a bit of light petting in the corner where people thought they wouldn’t be seen. Ravi was talking to a short, blonde woman by the old fashioned jukebox that could barely be heard above all the noise, and Buck-
Buck was sitting at a table diagonal from him, and Eddie couldn’t help but notice that it was a very attractive man Buck was sitting with.
Eddie didn’t mean to, but he locked eyes on them. Buck was laughing at something the guy had said, and the guy was leaning into the table slightly as if he was trying to close the gap between them. Eddie could feel a burning in his chest as Buck talked to this stranger, whilst he desperately tried to get Ellie to stop sucking the life out of her - now empty - drink.
Because here’s the thing, since Eddie got back from Texas, he’s finding it harder and harder to deny his feelings.
Whenever he looks at Buck, he remembers how Buck fought for his son's life, not resting until he knew Christopher was safe. He remembers Buck dragging his body under the fire engine once he’d been shot to remove him from the line of fire. He remembers Buck lifting him over his shoulder and into the fire engine, using everything he could find and every word he could muster to keep Eddie awake until he got to the hospital. He remembers how Christopher called Buck when Eddie was suffering from PTSD, and Buck ran over without a second thought to look after them both. He remembers how Christopher went straight to Buck when he ran away, and how Buck was the first person Eddie called once he knew his son was missing. He remembers how Buck dropped his life - his loft - to rent Eddie’s so that he could be with Christopher in El Paso. You really did that for me? Eddie remembers asking him, and that’s when it clicked for him.
No one in his life has ever made him feel as seen as Buck does.
And then Eddie left him.
And now Buck is sitting at a table drinking out of a red cup with another man drinking out of a red cup, and Eddie can’t help but wonder what kind of ‘fun’ they’d get up to.
“Earth to Eddie?” he heard, before a hand was wafting around in his face. He snapped back to look at Ellie, and he could see that her empty drink cup had been abandoned to the edge of the bar. She was looking at him like she was waiting for an answer to a question, but he didn’t even realise she’d been talking.
“I-I’m so sorry Ellie, did you say something?” Eddie questioned, trying to convince her that he was present again.
That’s when he finally felt it, her hand rubbing up and down his waist. He hadn’t even noticed because he was so far in his own head, and now he wanted nothing more than for her to stop it immediately. He jerked his hips back as fast as possible to create some distance.
He watched as she took her eyes off him and looked back over at the table Buck was sitting at. Then back at him.
“-Uh, actually” she slowly shifted back, “I think I may have misread this situation.” She turned to the bar man, asking for a double vodka and coke - in a red cup - with an emphasis on the double.
Maybe I’ve been misreading my own situation, Ellie.
She waited for her drink, paid, and turned back to Eddie. “Though, if I’m [gesturing down her body] not what you’re looking for, you might want to change the colour of that [pointing at his pink wristband]”. She didn’t even give Eddie time to respond because she was off and walking into the crowd.
Eddie was left standing at the bar alone, cradling his drink in his hands. He chuckled to himself because how can someone screw up a date in less than five minutes? The least he could have done was pretend to listen.
One thing he was listening to though, was the laughter coming from Buck’s table. It was mainly the guy Buck was sitting with - the one with the long hair and tanned skin and muscles bulging from his shirt - that was laughing. Still, Eddie couldn’t help but wonder whether Buck had secured a date in the first five minutes of the night, which wouldn’t be a surprise because it’s Buck.
Everyone knows, especially Eddie, that Buck is a catch. He is handsome, kind, loving, and funny. Ridiculously funny. It wouldn’t be a surprise to anyone if the one person to have success on this excursion was Buck.
He just wished it was him Buck was going home with.
Eddie sighed, removing himself from the bar. He scanned the room, searching for a sign that said ‘restroom.’ Once he found it, he slowly began to make his way over, weaving in and out of the many people scattered around the restaurant. He walked past Ravi, who shot him a very enthusiastic thumbs-up, followed by a wink, and Eddie copied it back to him (though his gesture was extremely sarcastic).
After a lot of ‘excuse me’s and ‘sorry can I just-‘, Eddie reached the restroom. Maybe he could just hide in there until the whole thing was over.
***
Buck’s ‘date’ was a guy called Thomas, or as he preferred, Tommy. Not to be mistaken for Buck’s asshole ex-boyfriend, though every time he read Tommy’s name tag he got war flashbacks.
“So let me get this straight,” Tommy said, “I’m your first date of the night, and your last boyfriend was called Tommy?”
“Pft, yeah” Buck cocked a brow, “not that he was much of a boyfriend.” He laughed at the memories of all the times Tommy had misunderstood him - actually, more like never tried to understand him.
Remember when he bought basketball tickets for your six month anniversary even though you hate basketball.
At least he got one back by taking Eddie to the game after Tommy broke up with him.
“Oh, that bad?” Tommy replied grimacing, “guess you didn’t really need the reminder, with, you know-“ He signalled at his name badge.
“-Uh, yeah.” Buck leant back in his chair, resting his red cup on his thighs. “I swear the universe is out to get me.”
Tommy chuckled, taking a swig from his - also - red cup, “oh god, you’re one of those people.”
“-Uh, one of those people?” Buck tilted his head and frowned.
Tommy laid back in his chair, flapping his hands. “One of the ‘everything is down to destiny, a higher power has influence over what happens to me.’”
Buck smirked. That sounded exactly like something Eddie would say. He remembers all the times Eddie made fun of him for believing in the power of the universe, or the times where Buck said that he was cursed. He definitely stands by that one, nothing could ever explain those boils that appeared overnight once he ripped the arm off a dead guy.
He remembers Eddie saying ‘it could be stress’.
Stress my ass.
That thought alone made Buck laugh out loud, and confused the hell out of Tommy.
“What’s so funny?” he laughed back with a questioning look on his face.
“-Oh, -uh, nothing it’s just, that’s something Eddie would say.”
At the mention of Eddie, Buck briefly scanned the room, wondering where he had got to. He spotted Eddie at the bar diagonal from him, talking to a beautiful lady who was clearly trying to show Eddie her ‘skills’ through the way she was manhandling - and manmouthing - her straw. In her red cup. Buck couldn’t see Eddie’s face, but he wondered whether he was smirking, or looking up at her with his beautiful brown eyes that he always gets lost in.
If only he could see my skills.
Stop thinking about Eddie.
He turned back to Tommy, who proceeded to glance in the same direction as the bar and then back to Buck. “And who’s Eddie?”
“Eddie is my -uh, best friend” he replied, because it was true. Eddie was his best friend.
His best friend that he has undeniable, unmistakable feelings for.
Tommy laughed, running a hand through his hair. “Best friend? Got it, I’ve been there.”
“S-sorry?” Buck questioned, “what do you mean ‘been there?”
Tommy playfully rolled his eyes, though Buck wasn’t really feeling up for games. He hated when people pretended that they knew him, or understood him, and he especially hated when it came from someone who’d only known him for five minutes. Or when it came from anyone called Tommy.
“Oh, nothing man it’s just-, I don’t know, your eyes lit up when you mentioned him.”
Funny enough, that’s not the first time someone has said this to him. Not just about his eyes, but his demeanour around Eddie in general. First, ex-boyfriend Tommy accused Eddie of being competition, and then Maddie said it wouldn’t be so crazy if he was in love with Eddie. He told them both they were crazy.
Eddie’s straight, I am not pining over a straight man.
“You sound like my ex now” Buck scoffed, swigging from his cup that was now practically empty. He was feeling defensive, even though Tommy the second, much like the old Tommy, knew nothing about him.
Buck turned his head away from his date to scan the room again, really just wanting to see how Eddie was doing with his date. Once again, Eddie’s date was displaying obvious signals. She was even lightly stroking Eddie’s waist with her hand. Buck wondered what it felt like, to be in such close proximity with Eddie in a romantic setting, to be able to touch him without feeling like he was risking everything. Watching someone else do it was like being stabbed straight through the chest.
For a moment, the whole room felt like it had blacked out, and all Buck could focus on was Eddie and how good he looked and how good he smelt and how lucky this girl is to even get to spend 5 minutes with Eddie like this.
“Is that him?” Tommy said, pointing right in Eddie’s direction, “Eddie?”
“Yeah” Buck sighed, “that’s him.”
“Riiiiight,” Tommy said, as if it all just clicked in his brain, “I see the appeal.” Buck looked at him, and it was so obvious that Tommy was checking Eddie out, even though it was just the back of him.
And what an impressive back it was.
For some reason, Buck felt a pit open up in his stomach. He knows Eddie is an attractive guy, he has known that ever since the first shift Buck had with him where he watched Eddie get changed in the locker room. He sees it every time he looks at him. And he knows it’s ridiculous, getting jealous when someone else notices, but it puts him on edge every single time.
Because Eddie wasn’t his.
Eddie could leave.
Buck didn’t even say anything, he just took another swig out of his red cup. Despite it being the cup labelled ‘fun’, he was having a horrific time. He turned around to look for a clock on the wall, not that he noticed what the time was when he first sat down. That’s when he saw the bar completely empty.
He scanned the room, seeing Eddie’s date across the room babbling away to some man, but no Eddie with her. Where had he gone? Surely he hadn’t left already, he wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye. And if there was an emergency, he would have asked Buck for help. Buck was sure of that.
So where was he?
***
Eddie had been hiding in the toilet for 20 minutes.
He had checked his phone 5 times, silently hoping that Buck had texted. He debated texting first, faking being ill, or saying Chris wasn’t feeling well (that one was a low blow).
Instead, he was sitting on the toilet, fully clothed, with his head in his hands, listening to what he can only imagine is a drunken hook-up in the cubicle a few doors down.
I wonder what noises Buck would make if it was us in there.
Nope! He couldn’t do this, he needed to leave.
And just like that, his phone buzzed.
Buck: where are you
Eddie contemplated lying, but he couldn’t come up with anything rational to say, and he had been gone far too long to use the restroom as an excuse.
Eddie: Hiding in the toilet
God this is embarrassing.
He watched as the three little dots flickered on the bottom of the screen, waiting for Buck’s reply.
Buck: I thought about doing that too
Eddie was slightly shocked by this statement. He thought that Buck’s date was going well, or at least it looked like it. He couldn’t help but smile to himself, not because he wanted Buck to have bad dates (definitely not that), but because Buck might be looking to get out of there too.
Eddie: That bad?
Buck: his name’s tommy
Eddie almost laughed out loud. Maybe Buck is cursed.
Eddie: Jesus
He decided he was just going to get straight to the point.
Eddie: I was thinking of going home
Buck: take-out and a movie?
God yes.
Eddie: sounds good, I’ll quit hiding now
He pretended to flush the toilet, giving the couple a fair warning that there was someone else in the room with them. They went quiet, but he could hear them laughing under their breath. They were low in pitch, suggesting both occupants were males. He felt silly, but all he could think was that he wished he had the confidence, the nerve, to do something like that. To do it with Buck. He wanted to crave Buck’s touch, for Buck to long for him, and for their bodies to be fused together like magnets. He wanted to be in public, all of a sudden getting the urge to pull Buck into an empty room and kiss him like he was never going to kiss him again.
Well, he already had the urge. He just couldn’t act on it.
Because they weren’t together, they weren’t lovers, they were best friends.
He washed his hands, despite not actually using the toilet, because he didn’t want the people in the stall to think he was disgusting. He pushed open the door, startled because Buck was already waiting for him. He could feel himself blushing, mostly because Buck was saving him from hiding in the restroom, but also because Buck looked so beautiful, and he was so happy to see him.
“Let’s go home,” Buck smiled.
Home.
***
This was exactly where Eddie wanted to be. Sat on his couch with Buck, eating Thai food, drinking beer, just the two of them.
“It can’t have been that bad,” he said, muffled by the sound of food in his mouth.
“Oh trust me, it was a train wreck.” Buck put his head in his hands. “His name was Tommy”.
Eddie snorted, shaking his head as he pictured the moment Buck read the guy’s nametag.
“At least he wasn’t trying to fuck you with a straw,” Eddie laughed, almost choking on his Thai food.
“You mean you didn’t enjoy her tongue display? Or her hands rubbing against your hips?” Buck winked.
Winked.
He completely froze up, his fork still in his hand. It was as if Buck just talked dirty to him, because now all he could imagine was Buck’s hands on his hips, and the image of Ellie sucking on her straw had been replaced by Buck sucking on... other things.
“You were watching?” Eddie asked, his voice slightly high at the end.
“You were watching me,” Buck smiled slyly.
Was Buck flirting with him?
“I-I mean not intentionally,” Eddie stuttered, “I heard your laughter from across the restaurant."
Okay so now he’s admitted he was listening and watching.
“I’ve just got a big mouth, I guess,” Buck smirked.
Good lord.
He looked up and could see a glint of playfulness in Buck’s eyes. He placed his plate down on the table and angled himself towards him slightly.
“Really? I hadn’t noticed,” Eddie lied, because all he could think about recently was Buck’s mouth on his mouth, Buck’s mouth on his body, Buck’s mouth on his cock. Buck’s mouth everywhere.
“Mmhmm” Buck mumbled, “so what didn’t you enjoy exactly? The straw or the hands?”
Jesus Christ.
“Right, enough about me Buckley,” Eddie said desperately trying to avoid the question, “what was so bad about your date? Other than the unfortunate name choice.”
“We’re not talking about me here Eds,” Eds, “we’re talking about how you had a beautiful woman ready to pounce on you and you ended up hiding in the toilet for - what was it? 20 minutes?” Buck was grinning ear to ear now, and Eddie could swear he was blushing and that Buck could definitely see it.
“I just wasn’t interested,” Eddie said, rolling his eyes.
“Okay, okay” Buck replied, holding his hands up as if he was admitting defeat. Eddie knew he wasn’t, and that Buck always enjoyed digging. “I’ll get us another beer.”
Eddie watched as Buck got up from the sofa, an imprint left in the cushion from where his strong body was pressed into it. He couldn’t stop himself from imagining what all that muscle would feel like pressed on top of him, whether he’d still feel an imprint of Buck on his body once he left.
His eyes followed Buck as he walked to the kitchen. Those goddamn trousers made his legs look so good, so strong. Eddie could actually see his thigh muscles as he walked, wishing they were smothering him instead.
Buck returned with two bottles, placing his on the table and extending his arm to offer Eddie the other. As Eddie reached for it, the tips of their fingers brushed against each other, and he felt like the air was knocked out of his lungs. He wasn’t sure if Buck felt it too, but now they were both staring at each other, and the air around them felt dangerously thick.
He grabbed the bottle, twisted the cap off and took a big swig. Buck sat back down next to him, closer than before, so their thighs were pressed against each other. Eddie’s whole body felt like it had electricity running through it, and one more touch was going to short circuit his entire system. He had never felt like this before, with anyone. It was an incredible torture.
He watched as Buck took a gulp from his newly opened bottle, and his Adam’s apple bobbed as the liquid slid down his throat. Buck turned to look at him, and he took a drink from his bottle too, watching as Buck’s eyes followed his Adam’s apple in return. Eddie swore the room was on fire from how hot he felt.
“Eddie,” Buck said lowly, capturing his attention, “w-why were you watching me?”
Eddie didn’t really know how to respond. His brain was foggy, picturing all the things he could do with Buck if given the chance.
He decided to edge his body even closer to Buck’s. He rested one elbow on the top of the sofa, placing his head in the palm of his hand so that he could look at Buck from an angle. “I didn’t want you going home with a stranger.”
That was true.
“Why not?”
Eddie smiled softly. “Because I wanted this,” he gestured between the two of them.
He could see Buck’s cheeks flush red as he pursed his lips together. “T-this?” he questioned, in a quieter voice than previously. The look in his eyes made Eddie want to caress him, to hold him.
He took his other hand that was resting by his side and placed it on Buck’s thigh. The electricity started again, and Eddie decided not to look back now. He rubbed his thumb against Buck’s thigh before giving it a squeeze, and then left it there.
“Yes, Buck,” he smiled, feeling a warmth spread through his entire body, “this. Us two, sitting here talking like we always do, every Friday.”
“It does feel more natural than any -uh, other date that could have come from tonight,” Buck smiled.
Any other date.
Before he could think twice, Eddie removed his head from his palm and used his newly free hand to cup Buck’s jaw. He slid his fingers into Buck’s curls and used his thumb to stroke at his blushed cheeks. When he felt Buck lean into his touch, he felt like he lost control, and he pulled Buck’s face towards his until their lips were almost touching.
Both of them took an intake of breath at the same time, as if they’d forgotten how to breathe. He could feel the warm air from Buck’s mouth brushing against his skin, making himself tingle in ways he’d never felt before. Buck’s eyes were tracing Eddie’s face, and Eddie’s eyes had fallen right on Buck’s mouth. His perfect mouth. Eddie’s heart was beating so fast he thought it might burst and Buck would have to perform CPR right here on his couch.
“E-eddie” Buck murmurs, looking right into Eddie’s eyes. They’re both almost panting for each other. The sound of Buck saying his name so quietly, so vulnerably, was enough for him to know he never wanted to turn back. Buck’s eyes were a mixture of softness and anticipation, as if he was standing on the edge of a cliff and was ready for Eddie to jump off with him.
He jumped.
Eddie pulled Buck towards him and their lips landed against each other. He could feel Buck’s lips were stiff against his, so he traced the outline of his lips, willing for entry. This earned a moan from Buck that sparked a whole new feeling in Eddie. He moaned back, as if to say he was just as present, and god was he enjoying it, whilst he continued kissing Buck as if he had been starving for him. He could feel the kiss in every single area of his body, making its way through his nervous system and sending tingling sensations down his fingers, down his toes, down, well, everywhere. Eddie had never felt so alive, so seen, so wanted, and he had never wanted someone so much. He wanted to explore every part of Buck, devouring every single piece, kissing every single inch of his perfect body, holding every sweat soaked curl in a locked fist.
At the thought of pulling Buck’s curls, he did exactly that, and the movement only made them both more hungry for each other. A desperate moan escaped Buck’s lips, and the vibration of the sound against Eddie’s own made him seek deeper into the kiss. Their tongues were dancing around each other, their lips crashing against one another, and occasionally their teeth. Eddie didn’t care that it was messy, or that he’d never kissed a man like this before, because everything with Buck felt perfect. What was it that he said to him before he left?
This thing between us has been messy and hard.
That was true, but things were messy in the best way, and now the ‘hardness’ of their relationship had a whole other meaning. Because Eddie could feel his cock straining in his pants. He tried to imagine a time where kissing someone caused so much tension in him, but his mind was blank. No one has ever had the ability to make Eddie feel like this, to make Eddie crave them.
And now he wanted to show Buck exactly how this kiss was making him feel.
Eddie adjusted himself, bringing one foot up off the ground, and within one quick motion, he flipped his body round so that he was straddling Buck on the couch. “F-fuck,” Buck whimpered, which made Eddie’s dick twitch in his pants. Eddie smirked, pulling on Buck’s curls so that he could look into his eyes. They were ravenous, looking him up and down like he was a piece of art on display at a museum. He could feel the bulge in Buck’s pants against his own, proof that they were in this together, like every other moment in their lives.
Eddie brought his lips down to Buck’s ear, briefly grazing the skin. “I didn’t like her hands on my hips,” he whispered, taking one of Buck’s hands and placing it on his waist, “because yours belong there.”
He felt Buck moan helplessly underneath him, before gripping Eddie’s waist with his other hand. Buck was now holding Eddie in place on top of him, his fingers digging into the skin just above Eddie’s waistband. The motion of Buck securing onto him made his hips twitch, and his clothed cock rubbed against Buck’s in a way that sent vibrations all the way through his body.
He was definitely doing that again.
He kissed Buck wildly, rolling his hips to cause more friction, both of them panting. He was pleased when Buck started sucking on Eddie’s bottom lip, the pressure alternating through all the ‘fuck’, ‘mmm’, and ‘oh god’s Buck whispered under his breath. Eddie completely forgot the events of tonight, he couldn’t even remember he was on his own couch, because all he could think about was the fact that Buck was underneath him, devouring him, and pushing up against the grinding he was making with his hips.
He had to stop the motion slightly after that thought, because he was convinced he was going to finish in his pants if he kept that image in his mind. He wanted to keep doing this for as long as possible.
He brought his lips down onto the skin of Buck’s neck, sucking and nibbling on it. Buck groaned beneath him, rolling his head back to give Eddie more access. He smiled against Buck’s skin, taking it as an invitation to delve deeper. He placed a hand over Buck’s chest, feeling the quickness of his heartbeat through his tank top, and Eddie found it so hot that he was able to reduce Buck to this.
He pulled away from Buck’s neck. “O-oh fuck,” he said through laboured breaths. The mark was so deep, it was probably going to bruise. Buck was just smiling at him, not bothered by the fact Eddie had basically maimed his neck.
So fucking sexy.
“N-no one will know it was y-you,” Buck said with a kindness in his eyes.
Eddie smirked, bringing his face in front of Buck’s once more. Their noses brushed against each other. “They will when you give me one.”
He watched Buck’s eyes widen, before a feeling of pure desperation settled over them. He felt as Buck’s hands made his way down from Eddie’s waist to his ass, squeezing on his cheeks. This made Eddie gasp, the sensation of Buck’s big hands digging into him almost sending him over the edge. He rolled his hips again whilst he simultaneously pressed his forehead against Buck’s, looking directly at him.
Before he knew it, Buck was pushing Eddie backwards against the cushions of the sofa. Eddie was now lying down, and Buck was climbing on top of him, one leg digging into the back cushions of the sofa and the other placed against the floor for balance.
Holy fuck.
Dios mio.
Buck tilted his head, hunger in his eyes.
“Is that what you want?” he teased, bringing his lips to Eddie’s neck.
“F-fuck yes,” was all Eddie managed, before he melted into the sensation of Buck’s lips against his skin. Buck began sucking on him, biting and licking the sensitive skin on his neck repeatedly, sending shudders through Eddie’s whole body. He arched his hips up, desperate to make contact, and gasped at the feeling of their cocks brushing against each other once more.
He needed him so bad.
Eddie grabbed onto Buck’s button up, pulling at the material to try and remove it from Buck’s body. Buck got the message, and pulled each sleeve off before chucking the clothing across the room. Now his muscles were out in full glory, Eddie could see Buck’s biceps popping as he held himself up on top of him. He instinctively lifted his head up, licking where Buck’s muscles were most prominent. He felt Buck groan under his breath, lowering himself onto Eddie even more so that they were on top of each other.
“You are so fucking hot,” Buck growled. Eddie shuddered at the words, desperately wanting Buck to touch him.
He grabbed at the bottom of Buck’s tank top, lifting the material over his head and discarding it away. He was so big. His chest was huge and his stomach was peaking out slightly over the waistband of his trousers. Eddie was completely, entirely, encapsulated by his beauty. He brought his hand up to Buck’s chest, slowly tracing it down his torso, which earned a smirk from Buck in response.
He could tell Buck wanted something more, considering Eddie was still fully clothed, but Eddie knew well enough that Buck was waiting for him to say he’s ready. He decided to show him instead, and began unbuttoning the white shirt he was wearing. He almost passed out when Buck swatted his hand away and began unbuttoning his shirt for him.
He barely managed to get the shirt off him before Buck’s hands were finding him again, tracing up and down his bare chest. His hands found Eddie’s hips again, gripping onto both sides. The skin on skin contact sent ripples through Eddie’s body, making him groan under his breath and kiss Buck desperately. Now they were naked on the top half, their chests pushing against each other as Eddie arched upwards onto Buck’s cock.
“F-fuck Buck,” he exhaled, rolling his head backwards as they grinded against each other. His hands were exploring Buck everywhere, grabbing onto his curls, his arms, his body, the waistband of his trousers. Eddie started fumbling with the button, but felt as Buck pulled away slightly to look at him.
“Eds, you don’t have to,” his voice was sincere, and Eddie couldn’t stop thinking about how amazing he was. How he always cares, he always makes sure Eddie is okay, he always reads him for signs he isn’t.
He leaned up to him. “I want to” he breathed, finally undoing the trouser button. He felt Buck gasp, urgently pulling his trousers down over his ass. It was a slightly awkward angle, so his trousers ended up resting just above his knees, but now Eddie could feel the shape of Buck’s crotch against his trousers without so much extra fabric between them, and he was realising what he had been missing out on. He couldn’t help but have a panicked, but also excited thought, about the fact that Buck felt massive.
“Y-yours too?” Buck asked. He was a little shy about it, and he could tell it was because he was worried Eddie might change his mind.
“I was waiting for you to do it,” Eddie said with flirtation. That was all Buck needed, because he hopped off from Eddie, removing his pants from where they were awkwardly resting on his knees. He was an absolute vision, standing there in just his pants. And Eddie was correct, he was huge.
Buck pulled Eddie’s trousers from the legs, and Eddie used his hips to slowly wriggle out, until both of them were in their pants. Buck was staring at him, slowly working his gaze from Eddie’s face down to his legs, like he was taking in every single part of him. Eddie loved it.
Buck got on top of him again, but this time took Eddie’s face in his hands gently. “You are so beautiful, Eds” he whispered, dotting kisses on Eddie’s cheeks, nose, and then a few on and around his lips. And now Eddie was blushing.
“You are perfect, Buck” Eddie replied back, using his own hands to brush through Buck’s curls that were slightly sticking to his forehead from all the action. He briefly considered licking his hands to taste Buck’s sweat.
“A-are you sure you’re okay?” Buck stammered, looking at him intensely like he was trying to read his microexpressions.
“Buck,” Eddie smiled sincerely, cupping his jaw, “I promise. Now please, get on top of me.”
He watched Buck’s demeanour change, a mixture of excitement and hunger. Buck pushed the full weight of himself against Eddie’s, their cocks grinding against each other. They were both panting, tugging on each other’s hair, smashing their lips together and breathing into each other’s mouths. Eddie could feel himself getting close, just from grinding in their underwear. He felt like he was 15 years old again, but this time it was right. Everything was right.
“F-fuck,” he stammered, “keep doing that and I’ll, -I’ll” he couldn’t finish because Buck had already understood him, slowly easing himself up. He was now kissing Eddie’s neck again, tracing his tongue over the sensitive patch he had marked earlier. Eddie was seconds away from combusting.
He took his hands and placed his thumb under the waistband of Buck’s boxers, stroking the skin underneath and the little pudge of his stomach that Eddie wanted to sink his teeth into. Buck’s breath hitched, combined with a mumble of profanity that Eddie found so endearing. He sunk his hand into Buck’s boxers, though the angle was slightly awkward, and slowly made his way to Buck’s penis.
He wrapped his hands around him, gently squeezing, and Buck was already shaking. Eddie was so turned on at the thought of Buck needing him so desperately that one touch could have him quivering.
The angle was slightly awkward, and Eddie had never been this close with a man before, but he began slowly moving his hand up and down Buck’s shaft, using some of the pre-cum to smoothen out the friction. Buck quivered under his touch, mumbling Eddie’s name under his breath, slowly straightening his back out so that he was on top of Eddie but more upright. Eddie shuffled up the couch, moving his head towards Buck boxers to pull them down. He added an extra twist by doing it with his teeth, meaning his lips briefly made contact with Buck’s skin.
“H-holy s-shit Eds,” Buck gasped. Eddie smirked, spitting on his own hand and running it up and down Buck’s cock. He started slowly, savouring every moment he could spend touching him, every moment that he could have Buck completely yielding under his grip. Buck was a mess of moans, shaky breaths, and squirms. Eddie loved it.
“Gorgeous,” Eddie sighed, looking up at him. Because it was true.
“F-fuck, -I - oh my god, You’re incredible,” Buck choked out, followed by high, whimpery noises. This sent a sudden voltage through Eddie, making him desperate to feel Buck fall apart from his touch. He sped up, adding twists into his wrists that he knew he enjoyed on himself. Buck was gasping, holding on to one of the couch cushions for support, his knuckles white from how hard he was clutching on.
“I’m gonna-”
That was the only warning Eddie got before Buck erupted, arching his back as his come coated Eddie’s stomach and chest. For a long moment, Buck slowly came down from his high, and then looked utterly horrified.
“Shit Eddie,” he said, his face completely red, “I’m sorry.”
Eddie rolled his eyes, bringing himself up to Buck’s height carefully so that he didn’t ruin his couch. “I’m not,” he smirked in response, planting a kiss on Buck’s forehead to reassure him, “though I do need a shower.”
Buck didn’t say anything for a moment, as if he was contemplating. “B-but, what about -uh, you?”
Eddie absolutely loved how much Buck cared for him, even in moments like this where it’s about getting him off. Everything Buck does is because of how intensely he loves, and Eddie is so grateful he can be on the receiving end of that. Buck’s love is the most special thing in the world.
Not that he’s saying Buck loves him in that way, but they’ve been best friends long enough for Eddie to know that Buck cares for him in a different, unique way.
God, he needed him.
“Oh, you’re coming with me,” Eddie said lowly, licking a long trail up Buck’s neck that made his neck roll back.
“Yes, sir,” Buck murmured.
Sir.
They were getting in that shower right now.
***
Buck wasn’t entirely sure how he ended up in Eddie’s bathroom, completely naked, Eddie in his boxers, covered in his come. His brain had been foggy - in the best way - since Eddie first kissed him. He couldn’t believe they had got to this moment.
Eddie’s skin was flushed, the redness covering his cheeks and his torso. Buck could see the mark he made on Eddie’s skin, simmering in the light from where a bit of his spit still remained there. He made his mark on him, and Eddie had marked him too, and he loved it.
Eddie leant over to turn on the shower, his back slightly arching and popping his ass out towards Buck’s direction. He was having so many thoughts, so many unsavoury thoughts, about all of the ways he could touch Eddie. Eddie with his incredible ass and his impeccable abs that Buck wanted to trace up and down with his tongue, and the hips he wanted to cling onto for dear life.
He watched as Eddie turned towards him, a new confidence in his stance that Buck had never witnessed before. The look in Eddie’s eyes was enough to make Buck weak at the knees, and he honestly thought his legs were about to give way.
“Come here,” Eddie murmured, holding his hand out. Buck took it happily, and Eddie yanked his body towards him. They were inches from each other’s faces now, Eddie’s naked torso pressed against his own. Buck could feel his own come being transferred to his skin, but he didn’t even care.
Eddie hooked his hand around Buck’s neck again, pulling him in. Buck loosened immediately, opening his mouth to let Eddie explore inside. He shuddered as Eddie traced his tongue around the back of his teeth, a whimper leaving Buck’s mouth that he had no control over. He held Eddie from the waist, desperately pulling his body into him, the feeling of Eddie’s stiff cock pressing against his own that was already hard again.
He actually might not survive this.
Buck’s hands made his way to Eddie’s boxers, tracing the lining with his thumb. Eddie groaned at the touch, deepening the kiss as Buck felt around his skin. Buck tugged his pants down, and Eddie shuffled and shook his legs to remove them. Once they fell past his ankles, he kicked them across the room in the direction of the washing basket. He almost tumbled into the shower in the process, which made them both laugh into the kiss.
The moment Buck felt their naked bodies glide against each other, he gasped. The feeling was so right, they both slotted together as if they were always meant to be there. As if they had been doing this for years. He could feel Eddie’s hard cock rubbing against his own, and moans escaped the both of them as they desperately dug their fingers into each other, devouring every minute.
The bathroom had started steaming up because of the running shower, which was just making the whole interaction even more intoxicating.
“Come on, then,” Eddie growled, pulling Buck into the shower. The water had already started hitting Eddie’s body, wetting his hair against his head. Droplets were falling down his body and Buck followed them, watching as his abs became soaked by the water. He licked his lips as Eddie stared intensely at him, leaning his body against the wall.
Buck stepped under the water, letting the feeling of it rush over him. He put his hands on Eddie’s waist, securing him to the wall, before licking a droplet of water that was making its way down his neck. Eddie groaned under his touch, squeezing his hand in Buck’s curls. Buck smirked, brushing his nose against Eddie’s, before kissing him forcefully. They were both soaked with water, their bodies sliding against each other, Eddie’s arching slightly to get more contact with Buck.
Buck broke away, asking a quick ‘you sure?’ before Eddie rolled his eyes, pulling in and kissing him again.
Buck took that as a yes, and brushed his hands all the way down Eddie’s body, before landing on his cock. He almost flinched back because here he was, naked with Eddie in a shower, both of them hard, panting, and desperate for each other, and he had the honour of being the one to touch him. The one to make him feel good.
This thought only encouraged him more, and he wrapped his hand around Eddie. He felt Eddie gasp, leaning forward. Buck loved how much he wanted it. He started off slowly, looking Eddie in the eye as he stroked him. Eddie was trying to look back too, but every now and again his eyes fluttered closed as he moaned, his hands digging into Buck’s sides.
“F-fuck, Buck” he stuttered out, “you feel so good.”
Buck had imagined this exact scenario many times. In all those times, he had never accurately pictured just how hot Eddie calling out his name would be. Eddie’s words alone made him moan out loud, and he quickened the pace. He was determined to give Eddie the best hand job of his life, flicking his wrist at all the right angles that had Eddie gasping and moaning and muttering Buck’s names. Every now and again, he nibbled at Eddie’s neck whilst he stroked, making sure that Eddie could feel the warmth of his breath. “J-jesus - fuck”.
“It’s okay, Eds,” he whispered, “I’ve got you.”
Eddie growled as Buck continued, and he could feel Eddie was close from the way he was throbbing and his grip on Buck’s sides was becoming lazier and lazier as he got nearer.
“B-Buck - fuck - I’m so close,” he whimpered. Buck wanted to tease him, so he slowed down slightly, moving his hand much slower than before.
“Want me to stop?” Buck whispered into his ear, nibbling on the skin at the top.
“I- swear to god Buckley, if you stop now I will never touch you again.”
This lit up a whole new type of fire in Buck, because Eddie was admitting he wanted to do this again. He wanted to feel Buck again. He started moving his hand fiercely again, muttering about how much he wanted Eddie, how he wanted to touch Eddie over and over, how it’s all he’d been thinking about for months. Eddie was moaning under his breath, his head tipping backwards and his eyes closed as Buck watched him. “Oh, oh - FUCK” he moaned desperately, and Buck knew he was close. He rubbed the sensitive tip slightly, briefly pushing his finger slightly into the hole, and Eddie ejected.
“Buck,” Eddie whimpered as he guided him through it, letting him ride the wave of his orgasm until he was sensitive and limping backward onto the wall. He could feel Eddie’s fluids all over his body from where he came, and it was incredible. He almost didn’t want it to wash away, but he knew that would be gross, so he watched as the fluids slowly drained off him and Eddie tried to catch his breath.
“You are so beautiful,” Buck said, bringing his hand up to Eddie’s face. Eddie smiled and laughed under his breath, and before Buck knew it he was laughing too, because he never thought that all those images of Eddie in his mind would ever come true. He never thought they would actually be together like this, making each other feel things that no one else could ever do.
“You’re gorgeous, Buck,” Eddie responded, bringing himself back up to Buck’s face now that he’d stabilised himself.
This time, Eddie leant up to him, placing small, loving kisses on his lips. He was holding Eddie’s face, and Eddie was holding his, and the water was slowly washing away the evidence between them.
Eddie leant down, picking up a shower sponge, and squirted some shower gel onto it. He lathered it up with the help of his hands, and Buck thought he was going to start washing himself, but he started washing Buck instead. He was dragging the sponge softly over Buck’s body, taking small breaks to kiss him as if he was already missing his mouth. Buck felt like he was flying, because nobody had ever taken this much care of him before. He then returned the favour, washing Eddie’s body, hovering over his abs and slowly tracing them with his thumb.
They then washed each other’s hair, stopping every now and again to pull each other into lazy - but sweet - kisses.
Once they were done, they climbed out of the shower, each wrapping a towel around their waist. They didn’t bother getting dressed, just walked back into the living room and sat next to each other with their towels pressed against each other.
“That was incredible,” Eddie said through a laugh, running his hand through his freshly washed hair.
“You’re incredible,” Buck said without a second thought, and Eddie responded with such a loving smile that made his heart skip a beat. He brought his hand up to Eddie’s face, pulling him in for another tender kiss. Eddie deepened it slightly, and Buck opened his mouth voluntarily, desperate to feel Eddie exploring him.
They pulled apart, and Eddie kissed his nose. He felt himself blush, and then Eddie kissed both of his cheeks in retaliation. Buck started laughing, and he felt Eddie’s hands trace down his body to his hips, and then Eddie was tickling him.
Buck was so ticklish, so immediately he started squirming and trying to get Eddie to stop, all whilst laughing and secretly wishing he’d do it more. He continued, Buck completely helpless, and Eddie ended up falling on top of him on the couch, the towels the only thing separating their naked bodies. They were both smiling uncontrollably, looking into each other’s eyes. Eddie ran his hand through Buck’s damp curls, pushing a couple to the side that had fallen during the commotion.
“I wouldn’t mind doing this again,” Eddie blushed.
“Oh I definitely want to do it again,” Buck smirked, “you’ve not seen my straw skills yet.”
Eddie’s mouth flew open, and Buck could tell he was picturing all the things he could do to him.
“But,” Buck continued, “I would like to clarify what this [he gestured between the two of them] is.’
Eddie slowly got off him, sitting next to him on the couch. He took Buck’s hands in his own, kissing his knuckles.
“I-I know this is a bit confusing.” Eddie started, “I really like you Buck, hell, like isn’t even a strong enough word. I’ve known for a while, I just, I belong here, with you.” He took a breath in, “You are everything to me, and to Christopher, and you always have been, and you always will be. You’re my best friend, my partner, and if I’m being honest, I should have realised sooner. That this [flicking his finger between the both of them] should have happened a long time ago.”
Buck was uncontrollably smiling, “it only didn’t because I thought you were straight.” He said it in a jokey tone, and Eddie raised his eyebrow in the way he always does when Buck jokes with him.
“I hope we have now established that I’m not.’
“Hmm,” Buck frowned jokingly, “I’m not sure actually. I’m a very visual learner.”
He loved being able to talk to Eddie like this, flirting in such an obvious way, and not worrying about what he said when he gets home later.
“Guess I’ll have to keep showing you then,” Eddie murmured, raising a hand to pull Buck towards him.
“Sounds like a plan,” Buck whispered before Eddie’s lips collided with his once again.
The rest of the night was spent like that, both of them almost naked, making out on Eddie’s couch that had gradually become more damp (from the towels, definitely not anything else.)
They kept kissing, smiling into each other’s mouths, just enjoying that they were finally touching each other. It was everything they both had been dreaming of but were too scared to ask for.