Chapter Text
The spooky melody coming from the speakers hidden somewhere in the front yard can be heard from a street away, like an ominous soundtrack to the dreadful afternoon that will follow. Several carved pumpkins line up the sides of the steps up to the porch of the house. There’s a skeleton hanging from the main door. Even in its state, trapped in between the fake sticky cobwebs that cover the surface of the door, the plastic jumble of bones seems to be mocking Woohyun. And no one else.
He wasn’t expecting this great display of resources. But if these people take Halloween this seriously, he tells himself, surely he can’t be the only adult at this party looking like an idiot.
Still, when the doorbell rings its last note, he can’t help but feel ridiculous. He shifts uncomfortably, changes his weight for one foot to the other on the doormat and squeezes Yerin’s little hand tight. It serves as a reminder of why he’s doing this. Why he does everything he does these days. Self-consciousness and self-preservation have no room when you’re raising a six-year-old girl way too stubborn and cute for her own good and her father’s.
Looking for comfort, he glances down at Yerin and is met with a pair of shiny eyes and a radiant smile that warms up his heart and makes it all worth it. He realizes wearing a silly puppy costume is nothing compared to what he’d be willing to do to make her happy, distantly wondering when it was that his own happiness and interests became secondary.
He’s never been a selfless person. Grew up being the willful child, always working hard to differentiate himself from the exemplary son that had always been his bother. It had all remained a constant until well into his 20s, and yet here he is, ready to sacrifice everything for this tiny human who can’t even reach the cupboards or make her own cereal in the morning without spilling the milk all over the counter, but has somehow managed to become the whole purpose of his existence.
“Woohyun!” a high pitched voice shakes him out of his thoughts and the pang of embarrassment is instantly back, a jar of cold water pouring over him. Someone’s mom--whoever invited him and Yerin to this party--stares at him unabashedly, like he’s a piece of eye candy. “Oh my god, you look adorable.”
She’s not even talking about Yerin.
Apparently he’s a sensation among the female, and sometimes male, population that gather outside the school the days he’s out of work in time to pick up his daughter. He has been trying to take on his role as a father more seriously and has already lost count of the amount of favors he owes his colleagues for shifts that have been moved around to make his life easier. The furtive glances and sometimes indecent comments of the other parents soon became evident, but he’s always ignored them. He’s aware of what it all looks like: a guy his age, much younger than almost everyone there, raising a little girl on his own when he’s not exactly hard to look at. He’s not stupid. He knows what women are after.
“Uh, thanks. I was against it but how can you say no to that face, huh?” he says, giving Yerin a knowing smile. “I’m sorry if we are late, we couldn’t find her white sneakers.”
“Don’t worry, you’re right on time. Come on in.” The woman steps aside and then closes the door behind them. “The kids are in the living room, honey,” she says to Yerin. “They are watching The Wizard of Oz, if you want to join.”
Yerin pulls at his hand to catch Woohyun’s attention and the man answers the question before it’s asked.
“Go ahead. Have fun.”
-
To Woohyun’s dismay, decoration seems to be the only aspect of Halloween these people take seriously, and Woohyun finds himself in the middle of the kitchen with floppy dog ears, a furry jumpsuit on and a gross-looking cocktail in one hand that’s supposed to simulate blood while the other parents are wearing dresses and perfectly ironed button-down shirts. He feels like he’d be more comfortable with the group of six-year-olds watching Dorothy fly into a magical land riding a tornado inside a farmhouse than here, and he hopes that these people have something stronger than the alcohol free liquid in his glass, because he is in desperate need of something that helps him forget that he let his daughter draw him a puppy nose with a permanent black marker.
After talking about what he does for a living with a couple of people, the owner of the house comes back into the kitchen with Sunggyu in tow. It’s been slightly disappointing not finding the young man there when he came, Woohyun admits. Even though Sunggyu has a tendency of being a condescending jerk in his presence, the masochist side of Woohyun seems to legitimately enjoy his company. He’s also the closest person to him in age in the room, which may be silly, but the fact does make him feel more comfortable around Sunggyu than he is with the rest of the parents.
He’s not sure exactly how old Sunggyu is, but he can’t be older than thirty. Sometimes, however, he makes a face or does something that makes him look ten years younger, and Woohyun questions his own ability to tell. He’s come to the conclusion that Sunggyu’s choice in clothing doesn’t help the matter either, but he’s sure it’s part of the reason why Sunggyu wears what he wears. His stuck-up attitude doesn’t go well with a casual attire.
Today, the man is sporting a light gray button-down made out of some sort of thick fabric and a pair of unnecessarily tight jeans. It is definitely a nice chance from the expensive suits Woohyun’s accustomed to see him in. A more relaxed look that favors his somewhat ageless features. The black pants compliment the shape and length of his legs and the shirt hangs nicely on what seems a lean but solid frame.
There’s nearly a slight sense of disarray when compared with his usual pristine state. His dark brown hair is a little ruffled on the top of the head, Woohyun notices, and his cheeks are sprinkled with a color two shades darker than the rosy of his lips, probably from the uncharacteristically cold weather they’ve been having all week. There are dark circles under his eyes, too, and a pinch between his eyebrows that doesn’t leave even when he smiles to shake a few hands. Regardless, he still looks like a walking wet dream, if you ask Woohyun, which only exacerbates the whole ears and tail thing he has going on.
Sunggyu, when he approaches him, opens with a snort.
“Hello to you, too,” Woohyun says before finishing off what’s left of his drink.
“What in the world are you wearing?”
“I don’t know; what does it seem like I’m wearing?”
Resigned to work with what he has, Woohyun pulls at the tail of his furry costume and throws a look down over his shoulder as though he’s looking for something.
In return, Sunggyu shakes his head and lets a small smile grace his lips, slightly curving the shape of his eyes. The frown is almost gone by now. “You are going to spoil that kid rotten.”
“Wrong verb tense,” Woohyun says, letting go of his tail to grab a snack from the table. “Also I’ve been told I look cute.”
Chancing a quick look around, Sunggyu states matter-of-factly, “You could be wearing a garbage bag and they’d still think you look cute.”
Woohyun feigns ignorance, just to see the way Sunggyu’s forehead creases once again, this time in exasperation. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”
“They are going to be talking about this for days.”
“What about you?” A straight eyebrow arches in question, and Woohyun elaborates, “Will you join the discussion? Do you think I look cute?”
“I think you look stupid,” Sunggyu deadpans.
“Ouch.” Woohyun brings a hand to his chest. “You hurt me.”
A moment of silence passes by before Sunggyu is sighing, as though he’s lost an internal battle with himself.
“I also think she’s lucky to have you. Your daughter. But forget I ever said this, I’ll deny everything when inquired.”
“Did you just say something nice about me?” asks Woohyun, playful grin on his lips.
“I have no recollection of it.”
Woohyun nods, still smiling to himself.
“Want a drink?”
“Yeah. What are you drinking?”
“I have no idea but it’s gross. Sort of tastes like a can of Redbull you left forgotten under the sun. But I’m the designated driver; Yerin wanted to go wild tonight,” Woohyun says, taking one of the glasses of punch that line the table and smelling it. He’s aware of Sunggyu’s eyes on him, of the relaxed curve of his lips. “If you want, this has alcohol in it.”
He offers Sunggyu the drink and waits for him to take it.
“How else am I supposed to endure any of this?”
-
Shoulder against the doorframe to the living room, Woohyun watches as Yerin tries to make Minjun, who’s dressed as Superman, fly with her mind. She’s wearing a baby pink dress, an oversized navy blue hoodie, a pair of white tube socks and a blonde wig that is already as messy as her own unruly hair usually is.
“Isn’t she too young for Stranger Things?” Sunggyu’s says behind him and Woohyun chuckles.
“I fell asleep on the couch while watching Netflix.”
“That nosebleed is a nice touch. Looks very legit,” Sunggyu adds, leaning against the other side of the doorframe and crossing his arms over his chest. “And is a welcome change when the blood’s fake and coming out of your daughter’s nose.”
Woohyun shrugs. “I’ve got practice from last Halloween. She somehow ended up on YouTube watching Michael Jackson’s Thriller. That was a shitload of work and she ended up crying because this other kid was scared of her. This time I’m just happy she didn’t make me shave her head.”
Turning to look at him, Sunggyu makes a face at him in disapproval. “Who dresses up their five-year-old as a zombie?”
“Someone who has no idea what he’s doing but hates to see his daughter cry, probably.”
Seeming ready to retort, possibly something insulting, Sunggyu opts for pausing instead. His mouth opens and closes a couple of times, but in the end it just sort of stays there, slack and wet and annoyingly inviting. When Woohyun gathers the will to look away, he notices Minjun standing in front of his father, a hand grabbing the upper part of Sunggyu’s front pocket and pulling at it.
His cape is wrapped around his neck and his hair is a mess, the gel that was previously keeping it all together barely preserving its holding effect.
“Dad, we can go now.”
Sunggyu straights up and glances down at the watch on his wrist.
“It’s still early. You want to go home?”
As if on cue, Yerin appears behind the little boy and answers for him, raising her hands in the air.
“We want to go trick or treating!” she says. Though her enthusiasm dies out quickly, giving way to a sad pout. “This party is boring.”
“Oh right,” Woohyun puts in. An apologetic grin forms on his face meant to placate Sunggyu’s impending glare. “I may have promised her we would do that.”
“Do you ever say no to her?”
“Irreversible body modifications, that is where I draw the line.”
That earns him a roll of eyes. “You’re the one dressed as a giant puppy, you should be opposed to going out in that thing.”
“What do you mean? This costume is awesome.” Woohyun’s eyes find Minjun’s. “Isn’t this costume awesome, Minjun?”
The boy nods his reply and adds, “Why aren’t you wearing a costume, daddy?”
“Great. So now you’re turning my own son against me.”
“Because he’s not a cool dad like I am,” Woohyun says, completely ignoring Sunggyu as he stays focused on the little version of Superman staring at him with eyes too wide, like a cartoon. “Sorry buddy, life can be tough.”
“Shut up, please,” Sunggyu says.
“It’s never too early to learn some life lessons.”
Sunggyu doesn’t say anything else for a while, firmly rooted in his stubbornness as three pairs of eyes beg him to say yes. Yerin has glued herself to Woohyun’s side, and even Minjun is now holding his hand as though to be clear of where he stands in this discussion.
“This is your chance to be cool, Sunggyu.”
“I hate you,” Sunggyu finally says, heading for the door with firm steps. When he notices no one is following, he adds, “Let’s go.”
Instead of following right away, Woohyun takes a moment to celebrate his victory by high fiving the couple of ecstatic children currently intoning a very sharp cry of excitement.
-
They visit a few houses on that same street. The kids walk several steps ahead of them and only stop on the ones where the decorations are scary enough for them to giggle and give little jumps in exhilaration. The neighborhood is quiet and well-kept, with green areas made out of tall trees and beds of flowers. It’s the kind of place he used to imagine himself living in when he pictured his life as a family man in the past, before Yerin came in the picture. Now, however, the prospect of moving to a place like this seems at the very least far-fetched. He never expected to have to raise a child on his own, let alone at 25. He’s nowhere near economically stable enough to afford any of these houses, and even if he was, he sees no point in living in a place that big when it’s just the two of them.
Out of the corner of his eye, he catches sight of Sunggyu walking next to him. He wonders what his place looks like, though it isn’t too hard to imagine. Perhaps a fancy apartment in one of the richest districts, so big Minjun can comfortably play soccer in their living room. Not that Sunggyu would allow that.
The sound of Sunggyu clearing his throat makes Woohyun look at him fully.
“Don’t you,” the man trails off, as though looking for the right way to phrase his question. “Don’t you have someone to help you?”
“Huh?”
“Yerin.”
Woohyun’s eyes land on his daughter at the mention of her name. They never leave her even though his mind is already somewhere else entirely. It travels back to that night and he finds himself gulping down the sudden knot in his throat.
“Well, my parents do what they can,” he says at length. “But most of the time it’s just Yerin and me.”
“Minjun’s mother is not around either.”
Woohyun doesn’t correct Sunggyu’s assumption and rushes to ask, “Any parents to help you out?”
“Just my mom. And well, there’s also Minjun’s nanny. I sometimes work extra hours and my mom is getting old so.”
“I tried the nanny thing once, too. But the moment I left our apartment Yerin started to bawl her eyes out, so I never tried again.”
“If you ever need someone to look after her, she can stay with us. I mean, she seems to get along really well with Minjun and I’ll be there to make sure his lips don’t go anywhere near her. For his sake, of course.”
Woohyun’s eyes go wide, half in mock, half in real surprise.
“This is the second time you are nice to me today, Sunggyu,” he says. “And to think you didn’t even thank me for buying you lunch the day we met. Look how far we’ve gotten.”
Sunggyu rolls his eyes. “I don’t even know why I bother.”
“I’m kidding,” Woohyun says, placing a hand on the other man’s shoulder and pretending he doesn’t notice the way Sunggyu’s muscles immediately tense up. “Right back at you, man. Minjun is always welcome at our home.”
“Thanks for the offer, but it won’t be necessary.”
Woohyun can’t help but snort. He takes his hand off Sunggyu shoulder. The guy is unbelievable.
“You don’t trust me,” he says, incredulity ringing in his voice. “What do you think I’m gonna do? Set your child on fire?”
“I’m not saying I don’t trust you, I’m just not sure you can take care of two small kids at the same time. It’s all.”
“So you don’t trust me.”
“I—”
“That’s ok,” Woohyun says, feigning indifference when the truth is it upsets him greatly. It’s not the first time someone questions his ability to take care of another human being and it always plagues his mind with insecurities, makes him wonder if he’s being the parent Yerin needs him to be. “It’s not like I’m dying to spend my free time with those two weirdos.”
Woohyun’s attention is back to where Minjun and Yurin are making faces at each other a meter away, sticking their tongues out and pulling at their own ears. He hears Sunggyu laugh softly through his nose. Although it doesn’t make him feel any better about himself, it does bring a sense of relief at the fact that Sunggyu hasn’t noticed he’s hit a soft spot.
“Fair enough,” Sunggyu says and then they both watch Yerin skip in their direction.
“Dad, I need to pee,” she says when she reaches them.
-
By the time they make it back to the park where Sunggyu and Minjun are waiting for them, Yurin is already dozing off in Woohyun’s arms, her head resting comfortably on his right shoulder.
Woohyun spots Sunggyu and his son on a bench near the swings. The boy is sitting on Sunggyu’s lap, going through his colorful plastic bag full of candy and taking out pieces to show them to his father, only to throw them back in. The expression on Sunggyu’s face is one Woohyun’s never seen before. He appears to be completely enthralled by what his son is telling him, nodding and smiling and making the boy laugh every time he opens his mouth to add to their conversation.
It feels like watching a stranger, so different from the person Woohyun thought Sunggyu was. Though he is not sure what he expected. Of course Sunggyu would behave differently around his child, it’s just that Woohyun has been incapable of picturing it until now, that he has the scene unfolding before his eyes. For such an incongruity, it’s fascinating how all of a sudden being a loving father appears to be second nature to Sunggyu. He seems comfortable, unguarded, and just happy, and when he leans in and kisses the side of his son’s head and lingers, eyes closed and all, Woohyun dreads his stupid costume for not having pockets. He’d take a picture and show it to Sunggyu as though to say “embrace it. You’re in as deep as the rest of us”.
“This one is done for the day,” Woohyun says patting Yerin’s back and feeling almost guilty for bursting in on such a tender scene.
Blinking a couple of times, Sunggyu glances up at him.
“Yeah, we should go.”
“I can give you guys a lift if you want. My car is not far.”
“That’s ok. We’ll grab a cab.”
Woohyun huffs out a laugh. “Come on, man. I’m a great driver.”
“I really wish I could take you seriously.”
Woohyun’s eyes follow Sunggyu’s gaze to the pair of long furry ears hanging limply at each side of this head. With a shift movement, he slides the hoodie off his head, not sure as to why it was still on in the first place.
“Do I need to remind you what I do for a living?”
“Only if you’re suddenly a professional driver.”
“I’m that, as well as many other things.”
As they talk, they start to walk in the direction of the car, and before they know it they are securing the kids in the back seats and driving to Sunggyu’s home.
“I thought you rode in the back of the ambulance.”
“Sometimes. Sometimes I don’t. Someone’s got to drive that thing places, you know.”
The ride is mostly quiet, so much that Woohyun catches Sunggyu fighting the invisible pull that pushes his head forward a couple of times before he finally drifts into a fragile sleep Woohyun is careful not to disturb. The man seems in urgent need of some rest, and though Woohyun feels tired himself, he takes a slower route, giving Sunggyu ten more minutes of sleep.
As expected, Sunggyu’s apartment is in a fancy neighborhood in the business district. The building is a skyscraper with mirror windows, so tall the darkness that’s covered the sky almost hides the top of it.
Woohyun stops the car by the curve, right in front of the apartment complex. He turns the engine off and faces the sleeping man next to him.
Sunggyu’s mouth is slightly open and his features relaxed. With no sounds to muffle it, Woohyun can hear the steady rhythm of his breathing, heavy but soft, not quite like snoring. For someone who has been so reluctant to get in his car, Sunggyu must feel really safe to be sleeping so soundly. Perhaps it’s for that that Woohyun allows himself to study the man more closely.
The light of a lonely lamppost filters through the window Sunggyu’s head is resting against and lands on his left cheek, turning the lightly tanned skin into a velvety dark yellow. It takes all of Woohyun’s efforts not to let his eyes linger on the pair of jutted out lips softened by shadows. He focuses on their surroundings instead; on the eerie state of utter silence the car has fallen into. It’s like time has stopped just so that he can admire what he wouldn’t be able to with the Earth spinning. It almost feels artificial, and when Woohyun leans over to place a hand on Sunggyu’s shoulder, he suddenly becomes too aware of the physical aspect of his own body. He can’t remember the last time he’s touched someone just for the sake of it, in seek of human contact and not just because it’s his job. He lets his hand slide down a limp arm, unresponsive to the touch, relishing the shapely feel of it until he closes his fingers at the base of Sunggyu’s bicep and squeezes.
“Sunggyu,” he whispers, more as a means to snap out of it himself than to wake Sunggyu up. “We are here.”
The response is not immediate. First, Sunggyu turns his face to him, but his eyes remain closed, the back of his head still resting against the window. Then, as though in steps, he opens his eyes, closes his mouth, opens it again and just pauses. He stares at Woohyun through his dark eyelashes. Perhaps he’s waiting for him to talk but Woohyun has nothing to say, his words lost in the moment like himself.
Sunggyu sits up, and Woohyun’s hand slides off his arm. He feels himself flush a little for not having noticed it was still there and clears his throat.
“Thanks for the lift home,” Sunggyu says, his voice husky with sleep. Giving a quick look at his now sleeping son over his shoulder, he rubs a finger into his eye. “Minjun never sleeps in the car. He’s a surprisingly light sleeper for a child.”
“I told you I was a good driver,” Woohyun says with a smile, finally out of his momentary stupor.
“I can’t believe I fell asleep.”
For a moment Sunggyu seems annoyed with himself, scowling at the windshield as though it’s personally offended him. When he turns back at Woohyun, however, his expression is neutral. He holds a finger in front of his face, signaling for him to wait.
“Here.” Lifting his body off the seat, Sunggyu takes out a small rectangular card out of his back pocket and hands it to Woohyun. “That’s my contact information. The offer still stands; if you ever need someone to look after Yerin, give me a call.”
The card has a minimalist but elegant design. Sunggyu’s name, personal number and email are written in a simple font in the middle.
“Thanks,” Woohyun says, throwing it onto the dashboard of his car. “Can I have another one?”
Unsure and with apparent reluctance, Sunggyu reaches into his pocket and hands him a new one. Woohyun takes the marker he keeps in the hole where the radio used to be, uses his teeth to uncap it. Flipping the card around, he scrawls his personal info on it, address included.
“There you go.”
“Uh, thanks?” Sunggyu says, taking the ruined card in his hand and looking at it with distaste. “You know these are really expensive, right?”
“Get out of my car, Sunggyu.”
Not without first giving him a glare for good measure, Sunggyu opens the door and steps out of the vehicle. Woohyun enjoys the view of the man’s backside as he rushes inside the building with his son in his arms, but looks away, shaking his head, when he remembers his daughter is sleeping in the backseat.