Chapter Text
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CONFIDENTIAL / CLASSIFIED L6 / DO NOT COPY
The following personnel file and all transcripts, appendices, and associated miscellany are classified for reasons of national security. Access limited to SHIELD clearance L6 or above.
A redacted version of this file is available to SHIELD agents L4 and above. To request access to the redacted file, please contact [email protected]. Allow 4-6 months for approval and confirmation of clearance.
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Dr. RAYNOR, Christina A.
Patient: Sgt. BARNES, James B. — DOB 03/10/1917
Session One
Conducted by Dr. Christina A. Raynor
10:30 AM, February 16, 2024
Unit #124, 325 West 27th Street, New York City, NY, United States of America, Earth
Transcript of recording as follows:
DR. CHRISTINA RAYNOR: —recording now. Dr. Christina Raynor, patient James Barnes, session one. The date is February 16, 2024. So, Mr. Barnes. I've heard a lot about you. It’s a pleasure to meet you at last. My name is Dr. Raynor, but you can call me Christina if you’re more comfortable with that.
SGT. JAMES BARNES: Yeah. Hi.
RAYNOR: I trust you understand why we’re here?
BARNES: Condition of my pardon.
RAYNOR: Exactly. [Pause] So, Mr. Barnes, since this is our first session, maybe a good place to start is by asking you this: what are your goals for our work together?
BARNES: Sorry?
RAYNOR: What do you want to get out of our time together?
[Silence — nine seconds.]
BARNES: I don’t know. Get my head shrunk?
RAYNOR: [Sighs] Your pardon is conditional on these weekly sessions. I’m not here to waste your time, and I certainly hope you’re not here to waste mine.
BARNES: Okay?
RAYNOR: I hope that you’ll take our work seriously.
BARNES: Course.
RAYNOR: Is there something going on outside?
BARNES: What? No.
RAYNOR: You seem unfocused. You’re looking out the window.
BARNES: Sight lines. Office building across from us has a roof with a really nice view into this room.
RAYNOR: I’m guessing you don’t mean nice in the way most people would. Would you like me to close the blinds?
BARNES: No thank you. I like the light.
RAYNOR: Okay. So, to bring us back to the topic at hand, I’ll ask you again: what are your goals? What do you hope to get out of our time together?
BARNES: I mean. My pardon, I guess?
RAYNOR: Mr. Barnes — James, can I call you James?
BARNES: Sure, why not.
RAYNOR: James, let me ask you this: how much do you understand of what you’ve done?
BARNES: What the hell kind of question is that.
RAYNOR: An honest one. I am trying to measure your grasp of—
BARNES: I understand all of it.
RAYNOR: Your file indicates that you have ongoing memory issues. Are you—
BARNES: I don’t have memory issues. Not when it comes to that stuff, anyway.
RAYNOR: Can you elaborate?
BARNES: Maybe some of the earlier — I don’t remember all the early stuff, stuff from before the war. But what they made me do? Crystal. Every second.
RAYNOR: You’re feeling angry.
BARNES: Yeah.
RAYNOR: Good. Anger can be a healthy place to begin. Tell me about your anger, James.
[Silence — twenty-three seconds.]
RAYNOR: I’m getting the feeling you don’t want to be here.
BARNES: Nope.
RAYNOR: You understand why you’re here, though.
BARNES: Yep.
RAYNOR: Okay. So. Why are you angry?
BARNES: [Pause] Why did you assume that I didn’t understand what I did when I was the... Why would, why would you think that? You think I’m not bothered by it?
RAYNOR: So you are bothered by it.
BARNES: Yes, I fucking am! Of course I am!
RAYNOR: What part of it bothers you the most?
[Silence — forty-three seconds.]
BARNES: I can’t do this.
RAYNOR: James, we are not finished our session, and if you leave now I will have to report you for a violation of the terms of your pardon. Sit down.
BARNES: I can’t.
RAYNOR: Stop that. Sit down and face what you’re feeling. Can you name what you’re feeling?
[Silence — one minute and four seconds.]
RAYNOR: You’re jiggling your leg. Is that a nervous habit? Are you feeling afraid?
BARNES: No.
RAYNOR: What are you afraid of, James?
[Silence — two minutes and thirty eight seconds.]
BARNES: What are you writing?
RAYNOR: At last, he speaks.
BARNES: What are you—? Doc. Come on, Doc, I have a right to know what you’re writing about me.
RAYNOR: I'm writing that you are comfortable with silence. And that you try to wait me out instead of answering questions you don’t like. [Pause] You were a sniper, isn’t that right? Isn’t that what that comment about sight lines was about?
BARNES: I still am.
RAYNOR: No. No, you are not, you are a civilian. Look, James, a word to the wise: if you want this to work, if you want your pardon to stick, you need to start reframing the way you think of yourself. You are a civilian. You're no longer a soldier. You’re a recovering POW. You’ve experienced extreme forms of torture and psychological manipulation, you’ve been victimized for so many years and in ways that—
BARNES: That’s not how I think of myself.
RAYNOR: That’s exactly my point. So, how do you think of yourself?
BARNES: I… I don’t know. But not like that.
RAYNOR: Describe it.
BARNES: I’m not a victim. Maybe… more like a machine. A machine that doesn’t work anymore.
RAYNOR: Good. Keep going.
BARNES: That’s all I got.
RAYNOR: Come on, James, work with me.
BARNES: A machine that doesn’t do what it’s supposed to anymore. So it gets, I dunno, thrown on the scrap heap.
RAYNOR: So you feel rejected? Alone?
BARNES: Oh, come on! Quit reading into it.
RAYNOR: That is quite literally my job. [Pause] Tell me about your social life.
BARNES: What? Why?
RAYNOR: Who do you spend time with? Do you have friends? Girlfriends, boyfriends? Do you go on dates? What about your sex life?
BARNES: Jesus! This century. You people have no boundaries, you know that?
RAYNOR: I take it that’s a no.
BARNES: That’s an it’s none of your business.
RAYNOR: So, definitely a no on that front. [Pause] If you think I’m pushing your boundaries a little, you’re correct. That’s what we’re here to do. That’s what my job is all about.
BARNES: Well, please don’t.
RAYNOR: Why not? What would happen? [Pause] Your arm, your metal arm. You’re clenching it. You’re making a fist. Are you feeling angry? Do you want to hurt me right now?
[Silence — 16 seconds.]
BARNES: Doc, I have literally never wanted to hurt anyone in my entire life, except the people who did this to me.
RAYNOR: So you were forced to hurt people when you were the Winter Soldier.
BARNES: Haven’t the goddamn papers been over this enough times? I mean, that’s why I got a pardon, isn’t it?
RAYNOR: Who did you hurt?
[Silence — 20 seconds.]
BARNES: You know. You read my file. You’re a smart lady, don’t play dumb.
RAYNOR: I want to hear it from you. Tell me who you hurt.
BARNES: Anyone. Anyone. Didn’t matter. Whoever they — whoever they pointed me at.
RAYNOR: Women? Children?
BARNES: I said, anyone. [Pause] Yeah. Innocent people. Witnesses. Yeah, children, little kids. Yes.
RAYNOR: How does that make you feel?
BARNES: Are you serious?
RAYNOR: Yes, James. I am.
BARNES: Well, Doc, it makes me feel like the worst piece of shit in the world. Like something Hitler would scrape off his goddamn boot. It makes me wanna put a gun in my mouth about ten times a day. Thanks for fucking asking.
RAYNOR: Excellent.
BARNES: Excuse me?
RAYNOR: This is excellent. This is really good. You’re demonstrating remorse. This is growth, James. Keep going, tell me how you—
BARNES: Is this — is this what all this is about? Is that why they’re making me do this? Are they trying to make me — I don’t. I don’t understand.
RAYNOR: James?
BARNES: [Quietly] Is this punishment?
RAYNOR: No, James, this is therapy. We’re exploring your feelings.
BARNES: I can’t. I can’t.
RAYNOR: Okay, you’re hyperventilating. Breathe, James. Breathe now, nice and slow and deep. In, and out. Slow down. Slow down, with me, okay?
BARNES: I — I need to get some air. I have to get outta here. Please excuse me.
RAYNOR: We’re not done here. James. James!
[Silence — ten seconds. Door slams.]
RAYNOR: God damn it. Hey Siri, stop recording.
End transcript.
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Session 1, Appendix 1: Notes
Mr. Barnes walked out of our session fifteen minutes before the full hour was up. However, his emotional breakthrough toward the end of our session was admirable, and our first session could have gone much worse. In light of this, I will consider today’s appointment a full session that satisfies the requirements of his legal arrangement. However, I will advise him that walking out of future sessions warrants the same disciplinary action as not showing up at all.
An additional factor: I am aware of the unique cultural barrier that the patient’s history presents. James, raised in the 1920s and 30s, has a vastly out-of-date perception of psychiatry and the stigma of mental healthcare, particularly for men. Combined with the severely traumatic experiences of combat and torture indicated by his medical and psychological assessments, which would be challenging for even the most well-adjusted and open-minded individual to overcome, I anticipate that for James, social readjustment and emotional equilibrium will not be easily achieved — if it is even possible.
At this stage, I am unable to make a confident assessment of his risk to the public. For the sake of public safety, recommend 24/7 monitoring of personal communications, movements, and contacts until advised further.
Dr. Christina Raynor
02/16/2024