Fastest slow burn to ever exist
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Help, the Dark Lord Is Flirting With Me and I Can’t Stop Writing Back! by lovelycatharsis
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
20 Jun 2025
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Summary
Harry Potter is tired.
Extremely tired, if he’s being honest with himself, not that anyone seems to care.
Nightmares have taken up permanent residence in his mind, playing Cedric’s death on an endless loop, paired with the horrifying realization that Voldemort is back. And no one has a properly functioning brain, it seems, because he’s been branded as a liar.
As if that wasn’t enough, this summer has to be spent with the Dursleys, who treat him like a house elf on probation. His days are spent scrubbing floors, washing windows, making elaborate meals he’s never allowed to eat, and worst of all: pruning Aunt Petunia’s flowers under the beating sun. And then there’s the newest, most infuriating development: he’s seeing into the bloody Dark Lord’s mind.
Alternatively: Lord Voldemort attempts to heinously fool Harry Potter into falling for him, then attempts to switch up at the last moment, but instead-
(well, you'll just have to read and find out!)