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Penguins, Pebbles, and Other Reasons to Pursue Unemployment by mightbewriting
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
11 Dec 2023
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Summary
“Is that…shit? On my desk?”
Granger doesn’t so much as look up from her mountain of teetering parchments at Draco’s question. Her hair: frazzled. Her frown: ominous.
The energy in their shared office: frantic.
“Penguin shit,” she says. “Specifically, it’s penguin shit.”
[In which a penguin-themed mishap at the Ministry nearly costs Draco his sanity.]
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Five years after the war, Hermione Granger has very little time for something like a relationship. She's far too busy trying to run the Bureau for Endangered Creatures efficiently, dealing with budget cuts and ignorant ministry officials and finding a way to somehow restore her parents' memories, who are still in Australia and none the wiser about the existence of their daughter.
When she discovers that the Wizengamot plans to use Draco Malfoy as a scapegoat whilst dealing with elusive Voldemort loyalists, she offers to testify for him. She's not quite sure how it led to her trying on wedding dresses under the watchful eye of Narcissa Malfoy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 320,000
- Chapters:
- 34/34
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 2,978
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- 8,909
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- 3,209
- Hits:
- 435,623
Bookmarked by Mooglish
04 Nov 2024
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Answer to the WIKTT "I'm Just a Gigolo" challenge. Harry asks Hermione a favor, but it will lead her to question her own marriage to Ron. Can Hermione continue to find contentment in a mediocre marriage and a completely unfulfilling sex life? When Hermione begins to see a gigolo for conversation and companionship, the foundation of her life is shaken to the core from revelations concerning every aspect of her life.
This story was started in 2004 and is now AU, ignoring all new HBP and DH canon. Winner of Round Three Multifaceted's Endurance category (best challenge fic).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 909,962
- Chapters:
- 119/119
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 1,592
- Kudos:
- 1,266
- Bookmarks:
- 406
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- 96,109
Bookmarked by Mooglish
27 Sep 2024
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Five years after the Battle of Hogwarts the Ministry of Magic has one more wizard to bring to trial: Draco Malfoy. However, it's not a trial they're after, it's a spectacle to celebrate the end of the Death Eater regime with the execution of their final prisoner. When Hermione realizes their plan, she halts the trial and invokes The Gallows Law — an ancient law that pardons any pureblood male without an heir if a witch will marry him.
What Hermione isn't ready for is the reality of bonding a broken, shell of a wizard and her new life as she moves into Malfoy Manor as the new Lady Malfoy.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 47,332
- Chapters:
- 23/23
- Comments:
- 2,959
- Kudos:
- 19,582
- Bookmarks:
- 5,553
- Hits:
- 585,694
Bookmarked by Mooglish
19 Sep 2024