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  1. Public Bookmark 31

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    “You are not a person,” Armand says, “and Louis desires me more than you could imagine. I am—everything to him. Everything.

    “Yeah,” the boy drawls, following Armand with his hands, his lips, the wet press of his teeth. “Keep selling it.”

    or: Armand disobeys Louis and kills Daniel in 1973. Cue fifty years of haunting, fucking a ghost, buried guilt, and desperately trying to manipulate your lover into thinking all of this is totally fine.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,001
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    46
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    165
    Bookmarks:
    31
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    29 Sep 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “You doing all right?” Daniel asks him.

    Armand blinks. “No,” he says.

    “Most honest you've been with me since I got here,” Daniel says. And then, because it seems like the thing to do, “I can clear out, if you need the place to yourself.”

    “Whatever you prefer.” Armand's lips look chapped. Dehydration? He ate the kid with the sunglasses, but the smear he left took a lot of bleach to scrub away. Maybe Daniel should - “You won't be harmed,” Armand says, “regardless of your decision.”

    “You got served divorce papers so hard it left a crater,” Daniel says, “and you're still poking around in people's heads.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,365
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    155
    Kudos:
    720
    Bookmarks:
    200
    Hits:
    13,478

    20 Sep 2025

  3. Public Bookmark 89

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    Who of us had not loved something or somebody? How much did these feelings, these loves, these worships, have to do with pure reason? Little or nothing, we saw at last. Were not these things the tissue out of which our lives were constructed? Did not these feelings, after all, determine the course of our existence? It was impossible to say we had no capacity for faith, or love, or worship. In one form or another we had been living by faith and little else.

    from The Big Book by William G. Wilson and Robert H. Smith, Chapter 4: We Agnostics

    Armand and Daniel on living by more than faith.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,507
    Chapters:
    5/12
    Comments:
    163
    Kudos:
    282
    Bookmarks:
    89
    Hits:
    6,262

    18 Sep 2025

  4. Public Bookmark 77

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    Survival is an artform.
    Armand has been an unwilling student, an eager acolyte, a master of the craft.

    The things he feels can be broken down into component parts. Can be simplified into anatomic essentials, the series of processes required to make him something that functionally resembles the likeness of man. Sensation without thought. Water-damp brushstrokes dragging across a canvas with no paint. No color. No light.

    Leaving Dubai was an act of necessity, arriving anywhere else an act of apathy.


    In which Daniel attempts to make sense of the past and Armand attempts to do whatever the opposite of that is.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    122,707
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    218
    Kudos:
    408
    Bookmarks:
    77
    Hits:
    12,487

    17 Sep 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Daniel is sprawled out across the bed, loose-limbed and lazy, somehow filling all the open space it has to offer and leaving Armand to nestle into the gaps. His cheeks are flushed, blood pooling like it knows what comes next. Maybe it does. Armand was reading about classical conditioning the other day. About dogs who become accustomed to getting food when their handler rings a bell.

    Perhaps Daniel is the dog, Armand’s teeth sharp bells reverberating in his veins. Or perhaps Armand is the dog, Daniel’s blood a song rattling in his ears. He has been a dog before. He runs his tongue along the bow of Daniel’s collarbone, gathers the salt-sweat there and imagines what it tastes like because Daniel does.


    Armand remembers he loved Daniel, once, and that Daniel loved him. Or a version of them did, at least. It isn't his intention to go back to that, but it's not not his intention, either. Such is the prerogative of an immortal: to hold two contradicting desires simultaneously. If nothing else, it passes the time while he waits for this miserable interview to end.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    145,420
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    1,418
    Kudos:
    2,246
    Bookmarks:
    646
    Hits:
    80,549

    17 Sep 2025