Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

|New Group Message| was opened by ALPHYS
Recipients:
(467)-890-4326
Papyrus
Toriel
Asgore
Frisk
Undyne
Mettaton
Napstablook

…………

ALPHYS: uh

ALPHYS: hi

UNDYNE entered |New Group Message|

UNDYNE: Hey! Alphys!

ALPHYS:

UNDYNE: …

UNDYNE: um alphys

UNDYNE: are you okay

UNDYNE: youve been idle for like ten minutes now

(467)-890-4326 entered |New Group Message|

(467)-890-4326: nah alphs fine

(467)-890-4326: shes been typing, deleting her message, then typing it again

UNDYNE: OMG. is that sans

(467)-890-4326: howd you know

UNDYNE: i just did

UNDYNE: but change your name its kinda confusing

ALPHYS: alright guys i made this group chat so we can all talk to eachother. i know whatwith getting to the surface, we have all been buy, but now we may be able to discover the true meaning of friendship.

UNDYNE: alright?

(467)-890-4326 changed name to |snas|

SNAS: this needs a new name tho

UNDYNE: "snas"

SNAS changed chat name to |THE SNAS FAM|

ALPHYS left |THE SNAS FAM|

PAPYRUS entered |THE SNAS FAM|

PAPYRUS: SANS!!!!

UNDYNE: PAPS! AWESOME!

UNDYNE: but sans yeah. the name is sad

SNAS: :/

UNDYNE: wait where's alph

SNAS: she just leaned back and sighed ;)

PAPYRUS: Don't wink. It's weird.

SNAS: ;)

FRISK entered |THE SNAS FAM|

SNAS: hey kid

SNAS: ;)

PAPYRUS: HUMAN! GREETINGS! I,THE GREAT PAPYRUS AM HONORED TO TALK WITH YOU!

UNDYNE attached file; virtual_noogie.exe

SNAS: i can totally imagine frisks face

SNAS: probably like -_-

PAPYRUS: SANS, DON'T BE MEAN.

UNDYNE: but true tho

FRISK: toriels coming

PAPYRUS: Hey Frisk! would you like to come to our house for a playdate? I've discovered these… 3D star puzzles that I'd like to show you!

FRISK: When?

PAPYRUS: NOW!!!

FRISK: Sure!

SNAS: wait we should clean up our mess first

PAPYRUS: You mean your mess.

SNAS: ;)

TORIEL entered |THE SNAS FAM|

TORIEL: Hello, my friends.

SNAS: hey tori

PAPYRUS: HELLO MAJESTY!

UNDYNE: Hey

SNAS: ;)

ALPHYS entered |THE SNAS FAM|

ALPHYS changed chat name to |THE SNAS FAMINE|

ALPHYS left |THE SNAS FAMINE|

UNDYNE: YES

~~~~~~~~~~~~

SNAS: @UNDYNE Remember to be subtle when you mark cards

UNDYNE: Not caught yet

PAPYRUS: SANS YOU HAD BETTER NOT BE GAMBLING AGAIN

SNAS: uhhhh

~~~~~

UNDYNE: Mettaton you left your prefrontal cortex at paps and sanss house

METTATON: oops

FRISK: this is stupid

SNAS: would you look at the time

FRISK: is it Bad 'o clock again

SNAS: no its 2:30

SNAS: jesus cant you forgive a guy

Chapter Text

ASGORE entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

ASGORE: …

ALPHYS entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

ALPHYS: boss!

UNDYNE entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

TORIEL entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

FRISK entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

ASGORE: What is "the snas famine"?

TORIEL: Asgore.

UNDYNE: HOLY SHIT ITS GONNA GET REAL

TORIEL: Frisk, sweetheart. It would be better if you left this for now.

ASGORE: I have some

ASGORE: buisness to attend to, so…

TORIEL: You're not going anywhere.

TORIEL: So, Asgore.

ASGORE: um

TORIEL: Do you know what I'm going to talk to you about?

ASGORE: um

ASGORE created a private channel
Recipients:
Alphys

ASGORE (private channel): help me

ALPHYS (private channel): ill try

ALPHYS closed the Private Channel

ALPHYS: so toriel

ALPHYS: hows your school going

TORIEL: I will not be deterred.

ALPHYS: sorry asgore

TORIEL: I CAN NOT BELEIVE YOU

TORIEL: YOU ASKED ME OUT AFTER WHAT YOU DID

TORIEL: YOU TEXT ME, LITTERALLY SAYING "hey lets go see a movie, oh nd sorry about that whole thingwhere i MURDERED SIX CHILDREN"

TORIEL: i mean not literally but still

ASGORE: Im so sorry. how about we talk bout it

ASGORE: in person

ASGORE: at dinner tomorrow at 8:30

TORIEL: udhhdyeveudvdyevxiwbwy

TORIEL left |THE SNAS FAMINE|

Chapter Text

PAPYRUS entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

PAPYRUS added (004)-196-7602 to |THE SNAS FAMINE|

(004)-196-7602 renamed the chat to |SHOWTIME|

UNDYNE: oh no

FRISK: smells like mettaton

UNDYNE: OH NO NO NO

(004)-196-7602: OHHH YES

(004)-196-7602 changed name to |METTATON|

METTATON: Ah yes.

SNAS: wait wait wait

SNAS: what does mettaton smell like frisk

FRISK: idk

SNAS ;)

FRISK: -_-

SNAS: ehehehehehe

FRISK: ehehehehehe

FRISK: ;)

PAPYRUS: I HAVE BROUGHT MY NEW FRIEND! IS THAT OKAY?

ALPHYS: yeah of course!

ALPHYS: hey mesttaton

ALPHYS: *mettaton

METTATON: hello, alphys.

METTATON: I'm sorry. I have been distant with you since we arrived. How about… Dinner! Tonight. At my place. In fact, you are all invited!

ALPHYS: sure

PAPYRUS: THANK YOU! ID LOVE THAT !

SNAS: im down

SNAS: ;)

PAPYRUS: sdjhjk(

ASGORE: Sorry, I have dinner with Tori tonight.

TORIEL:No. You do not. I will be there.

UNDYNE: TORIEL: IN FOR THE KILL

UNDYNE: but ill be there

METTATON: See you all there then!

Chapter Text

ALPHYS: i need somewhere to stay

UNDYNE: what happened

ALPHYS: i know the humans havent been... welcoming.

ALPHYS: i never thought they would do something like this

SNAS entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

SNAS: what did they do

ALPHYS: no sans dont do something stupid

SNAS: what the fuck did they do

ALPHYS: it wasnt that bad

SNAS:

ALPHYS: it was just a little fire

SNAS: undyne

UNDYNE: meet you at alphs place in 5

UNDYNE: they will pay

ALPHYS: no dont aggravate them more

UNDYNE left |THE SNAS FAMINE|

UNDYNE left the |THE SNAS FAMINE|

ALPHYS: oh no

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SNAS entered |THE SNAS FAMINE|

SNAS renamed the conversation |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

UNDYNE entered |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

UNDYNE: alph you can stay at my house

ALPHYS: Really?!

UNDYNE: what are friends for?

ALPHYS: thx. and what happened to that guy

SNAS: his body is in a back alley

ALPHYS: god damn

ASGORE entered |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

ASGORE: Sans. Undyne.

SNAS: worth it.

UNDYNE: yeah

ASGORE: You realize the legal repercussions of killing a person, then leaving their smoking body in an alley, riddled with spears and bones, right?

SNAS: i have no fingerprints

SNAS: undyne is a fish

ASGORE: thats not the point

PAPYRUS: sans

PAPYRUS: Please dont do that again

SNAS: hey you finally tuned off caps lock

SNAS: heh

PAPYRUS: .........

SNAS: lets have a talk in person

SNAS left |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

PAPYRUS left |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

Chapter Text

Frisk added FLOWEY to |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

FLOWEY: Howdy

SNAS: fuck you

UNDYNE: fuck you

METTATON: Language!

TORIEL: Fuck you

SNAS: wait

SNAS: frisk did you tell her

FRISK: …………,

TORIEL: Tell me what.

FLOWEY: Dont

NAPSTABLOOK: oh………

NAPSTABLOOK: am i interrupting
something…………………………………

METTATON: No!

NAPSTABLOOK has already left |JUSTICE DELIVERED|

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FLOWEY: Yall need to find your zen

FLOWEY: I have

UNDYNE: fuck you we all know you have no soul you bastard

FLOWEY: why the animosity

UNDYNE: WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK

FLOWEY: ive been mediating

ALPHYS: Sitting on what? a pile of Dust

FLOWEY: not u2

SNAS: raised by wolves

UNDYNE: what

SNAS: nvm

~~~~~~~~~~~

FLOWEY: It gets lonely down here.

UNDYNE: idc

FLOWEY: Look how do you know what i may or may not have done......

ALPHYS: Frisk told us alllll about "omega flowey"

FLOWEY: look i had a lot of emotions and no way to express them

UNDYNE: so you dropped nukes on frisk

FLOWEY: maybe little

UNDYNE named the conversation |no|

UNDYNE left |no|

ALPHYS: not cool

FLOWEY: look im trying to correct my mistakes

ALPHYS: go ahead and try. It won't work

Chapter Text

PAPYRUS: sans

PAPYRUS: its adorable

PAPYRUS: CAN WE KEEP IT

SNAS: paps………

ALPHYS: wait

ALPHYS: what

PAPYRUS: HIS NAME IS MCFLUFFERS

SNAS: paps wants a cat he found somewhere

PAPYRUS: WE DONT HAVE A LITTER BOX

PAPYRUHS: SO I TOOK A BOX AND FILLED IT WITH OATMEAL

UNDYNE: BAHAHAHA WTF

SNAS… i was gonna eat that

PAPYRUS: TWAS A WORTHY CAUSE

PAPYRUS: ITS SO CUTE

PAPYRUS: I LOVE IT

SNAS: remember the last time you had an animal like this

ASGORE: If this is anything like that incident, I suggest you scrap the idea.

TORIEL: It's not because of you, Papyrus, its just……

UNDYNE: We don't want another 2012.

METTATON: No wtf that was top notch comedy

PAPYRUS: NO

PAPYRUS: THIS IS DIFFERENT THEN THE TEMMIES

PAPYRUS: THIS ANIMAL DOESNT LIGHT FIRES

PAPYRUS: OR JOIN GANGS

ALPHYS: the temmie incident is in the past

UNDYNE: lets leave it there

SNAS: agreed

TORIEL: Agreed

ASGORE: Agreed.

FLOWEY: wait what

~~~~~~~~~~

FLOWEY: YOU FUCKERS

UNDYNE: so much for finding your zen

FLOWEY: YOU SAID COULD NEVER MAKE A FRIEND

FLOWEY: STAND CORRECTED BITCHES

UNDYNE: no way

FLOWEY: I WENT TO TEMMIE VILLAGE TO RESEARCH THE TEMMIE INCIDENT

FLOWEY: I FOUND FRIENDSHIP

FRISK entered |no|

FRISK: not the dancing mushroom

FLOWEY: yep!

UNDYNE: what

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PAPYRUS: HE LOOKS HUNGRY

PAPYRUS: SO WERE AT THE PET STORE FOR FOOD

PAPYRUS: HE SEEMS ENAMORED WITH THE GOLDFISH

PAPYRUS: AND HE SEEMED SO HUNGRY

SNAS: paps………

PAPYRUS: SO HUNGRY…

UNDYNE: this is so insensitive…

PAPYRUS: OOPS

PAPYRUS: UHHHHHHH

PAPYRUS: OOPS

UNDYNE: nah man idc

UNDYNE: im pulling you femur

PAPYRUS: SORRY ANYWAYS. I FEEL SO BAD

SNAS: paps

SNAS: its going tibia okay

TORIEL: Hee hee hee

PAPYRUS: NO

PAPYRUS: NO

~~~~~~~~~~

METTATON: Oh shit

METTATON: OH SHIT

METTATON: LOOK AT ALL THESE SUBSCRIBERS!

SNAS: ikr YouTube is great

METTATON: Thanks for letting me borrow your cat for the video, Paps.

SNAS: wait

SNAS: thats papss cat

SNAS: its adorable

PAPYRUS: NOW CAN WE KEEP IT

SNAS: my heart is melting

PAPYRUS: SO?

SNAS: yes yes yes

~~~~~~~~~~~~

FLOWEY: Mettaton what do you mean 'all these subscribers'

FLOWEY: you have 13

METTATON: silence

SNAS: Papyrus you owe me oatmeal

FLOWEY: …

Chapter Text

UNDYNE named the conversation |DAMMIT|

UNDYNE: MY LAMP

ALPHYS: oops

FRISK entered |DAMMIT|

UNDYNE: my lamp

FRISK: what

UNDYNE: MY lamp

ALPHYS: I can fix it

UNDYNE: my LAMP

FRISK: 1:26 is to early for this shit

UNDYNE: MY LAMP

FRISK left |DAMMIT|

UNDYNE: ALPHYS

UNDYNE: JUST BECAUSE WE LIVE TOGETHER

UNDYNE: GIVES YOU NO RIGHT TO TOUCH MY FUCKING LAMP

ALPHYS: im so sorry

SNAS entered |DAMMIT|

SNAS: no touch lamp alphys

SNAS: but you can touch other things

SNAS: if you catch my drift

SNAS: ;).

ALPHYS: shsfjksjk(

SNAS: ;)

ALPHYS left |DAMMIT|

UNDYNE: MY LAMP

Chapter Text

ALPHYS named the conversation |MERRY HALLOWEEN|

ALPHYS: well its that time of year..... you all know what to do

FRISK entered |MERRY HALLOWEEN|

FRISK: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UNDYNE: no idea

FLOWEY: yeah what the fuck is halloween

PAPYRUS: WHAT IS IT?

SNAS: its Halloween yall

TORIEL: It's what now?

METTATON: is it mettatime?

ALPHYS: no sans is right

UNDYNE: tf is halloween

ALPHYS: its like

ALPHYS: uhhhhh

SNAS: basically the cumulative human race decides to all dress up as creepy shit, decorate their houses with pictures of dead bodies and the devil, then go collect candy from strangers

FRISK: -_- sans stop ruining the good things in life

METTATON: so like comiccon

ALPHYS: kinda

PAPYRUS: FREE CANDY!?!?!?!?!??!?!!?!??!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

UNDYE: DAMN RIGHT ILL BE GOING

PAPYRUS: CANDY

UNDYNE: BODIES

PAPYRUS: …

UNDYNE: AND CANDY

PAPYRUS: YEAH

ALPHYS: what will you dress as?

PAPYRUS: METTATON!!!

SANS- private chat
Recipients:
Papyrus

SANS: gay

|MERRY HALLOWEEN|

UNDYNE: ill cosplay justice

ALPHYS: what

~~~~~~~~~~~~

ALPHYS: hey, are any of you up for a halloween party

FLOWEY: youre such an ass

UNDYNE: HECK YEAH

PAPYRUS: UNDYNE, FRISK, AND I WILL PROVIDE FOOD

FRISK: CALL THE FIRE BRIGADE

PAPYRUS: NO! THIS IS DIFFERENT!

UNDYNE: My house could still be on fire for all we know

FRISK: that was fun

UNDYNE: yeah

PAPYRUS: KITCHEN! LETS GO!!!!!

SNAS: ill bring ketchup

TORIEL: Snail pie!!!

FLOWEY: Ill make a cake!!!!

FLOWEY: lol who the fuck am i kidding im stuck down here

FLOWEY: haha id probably bring a fuckin dead body i have no soul lol

FRISK: There is something

FLOWEY: …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

METTATON: Alright! costumes everyone!

UNDYNE: WONDER WOMAN

UNDYNE: BUT AS A FISH

METTATON: i like it!

FRISK: Homestuck Sollux cosplay

METTATON: ahhh, i just finished reading that!!!!!

TORIEL: Dumbledore

ASGORE: Thorin Oakenshield

METTATON: Fabulous

SNAS: how do you know what that shit is

ASGORE: Careful study of

ASGORE: uhhhhh………………………………………………

ASGORE: HBO max

TORIEL: netflix

TORIEL: up your game Assgore

UNDYNE: haha your ex is badass boss

ASGORE: right you are…

METTATON: everyone else?

SNAS: alright prepare yourselves

SNAS: Ima be…………………………

METTATON: sans...................

SNAS: Jack Spellington

METTATON: oh i thought you were gonna say generic skeleton thats actually kind of good!

SNAS: yeah

PAPYRUS: A HUMAN

SNAS: what

PAPYRUS: ILL DRESS AS A HUMAN

SNAS: ok............. k?

NAPSTABLOOK: i gues ill be a ghost.......................................................................................

ALPHYS: i can be mew mew

ALPHYS: from my anime

UNDYNE: i remember when we watched that

UNDYNE: I also remember what happened when we went up to your room afterwards .......... ;)

ALPHYS went idle

UNDYNE: heh

METTATON: IM GONNA BE METTATON

TEMMIE: hOI

TORIEL: Who is this?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FRISK: HOOOOOLY SHIT

PAPYRUS: JUST GOT BACK FROM TRICK OR TREATING

FRISK: SUGAR HIIIIIIIGH

TEMMIE: me all the time tbh

FRISK: who added you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UNDYNE- private chat
Recipients: Everyone-PAPYRUS, METTATON

UNDYNE: so know how paps is gay for mettaton

FLOWEY: no

SNAS: yee

UNDYNE: well i gave paps advice then got him and mettaton isolated in a room together

UNDYNE: im hiding in a houseplant spying on them

UNDYNE: ill keep yall updated

SNAS: sweet

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UNDYNE: alright paps is initiating subtle banter

UNDYNE: …

UNDYNE: k so paps is not subtle

SNAS: no shit

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UNDYNE: alright now he extends his arm slowly around mettatons neck and shoulders

UNDYNE: ………dammit papyrus

UNDYNE: he just punched mettaton in the ear

SNAS: heh

UNDYNE: and is now on hands and knees looking for it on the floor

TORIEL: BAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

SNAS: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UNDYNE: YES

UNDYNE: THEYRE MAKING OUT ON THE COUCH

UNDYNE: NOW I ESCAPE

SNAS: how

UNDYNE: I GRAPPLE HOOK THROUGH THE ROOF

SNAS: wait

|MERRY HALLOWEEN|

FRISK: what was that

METTATON: WHAT THE FUCK

FLOWEY: you idiots

Chapter Text

SNAS: guess what day it is

PAPYRUS: ILL CHECK THE CALENDAR

PAPYRUS: ???????

PAPYRUS: oh

PAPYRUS: NOOOOOOOOOOO

UNDYNE entered |MERRY HALLOWEEN|

UNDYNE: what is it

SNAS named the conversation |THE MOST PUNDERFULL TIME OF THE YEAR|

PAPYRUS: its....... Dark humor day

SNAS: how do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?

UNDYNE: ????

SNAS: nail its other hand to the floor

UNDYNE: what

UNDYNE: is wrong with you

SNAS: i guess my humor is like food

UNDYNE: ????????

SNAS: some people don't get it

UNDYNE: ?????????

UNDYNE: ………!!!!!!!!!!!

FRISK entered |THE MOST PUNDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR|

FRISK: Hey undyne can i

FRISK: …

FRISK: sans the fuck is wrong with you

SNAS: why did the boy drop his ice cream

SNAS: because he got hit by the bus

FRISK: thats not even dark

SNAS: knock knock

FRISK: … whos there ?

SNAS: certainly not the kid

UNDYNE went idle

SNAS: why did the boy fall off the swing?

SNAS: because he didnt have arms

FRISK: thats almost as stupid as the tractor joke

SNAS: which one

FRISK: what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor

SNAS: wheres my tractor

FRISK: cmon lets do some real joke off rn

SNAS: ten minutes to prepare

FRISK: @METTATON mod us

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

METTATON: k we gon be on tv

SNAS: what

METTATON: aaaand were live

METTATON: LADIES AND GENTELMAN, BOYS AND GIRLS

METTATON: THIS IS METTATON STREAMING THIS PUN OFF FROM KCTS9

METTATON: OUR CONTESTANTS ARE FRISK AND SANS!

METTATON: ANY WORDS BEFORE WE START:

FRISK: you butter be ready

SNAS: knife try

FRISK: i wont let you oil my plans

SNAS: nut a chance

METTATON: And, our first topic is carp related puns! Sans, your go.

SNAS: What do you call a dead fish?

SNAS: a carpse

FRISK: what do you call a company run by fish?

FRISK: a carporation

SNAS: whats a tv show for fish

SNAS: carptoon network

FRISK: i think you mean carps and rec

WITTY RETORT! +100 ratings

SNAS: ice try. But what do you call a floor made out of fish?

SNAS: a carpet

DOUBLE PUN! +100 ratings

FRISK: what do you call a high ranking official in the army?

FRISK: a carporal

SNAS: …

METTATON: OH MY: IS FRISK THE WINNER OF ROUND ONE?

SUSPENSE! +10 ratings

SNAS: i think you mean a carptain

WITTY RETORT! +100 ratings

DRAMATIC COMEBACK! +100 ratings

SUSPENSE! +10

FRISK: touché

METTATON: WITH THAT STUNNING PERFORMANCE, SANS WINS THE FIRST ROUND OF THIS BEST-OF-THREE SHOWDOWN!!!!

UNDYNE entered |THE MOST PUNDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR|

UNDYNE: hey has anyone seen my MewMew KissyCutie 4: the movie patterned bra

UNDYNE: …………………………………………

UNDYNE left |THE MOST PUNDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR|

COMEDIC TIMING! +200 ratings

METTATON: um

METTATON: come back next week for the epic conclusion, i guess.

METTATON: and cut.

FRISK: i didnt come here to make friends, sans.

SNAS: cya next week.

Chapter Text

SNAS: wait

SNAS changed UNDYNE to fishbitch69

SNAS: i can

SNAS changed ASGORE to fluffybuns

fishbitch69 changed SNAS to smoleboneboy

smoleboneboy changed METTATON to mrrobokink

fishbitch69 changed PAPYRUS to thebiglongbone

smoleboneboy chnaged TORIEL to theorigionalbadpun

fishbitch69 changed ALPHYS to gay

smoleboneboy changed FLOWEY to phsycoplant

fishbitch69 changed FRISK to innocent

smoleboneboy: that last name doesnt work

fishbitch69: ????????

smoleboneboy: they seem less innocent depending on how far you go back in their search history

fishbitch69 changed innocent to notinnocentapparently

smoleboneboy changed NAPSTABLOOK to dapperdeadguy

fishbitch changed TEMMIE to WHO IS THIS

ERROR010011100$01010101010101010101010100111001110101001011001100110010101100101010101010101010101101010101011100111001111000101101010ERROR1001101001110001111000110000111110001101011010111011110100101010101010101010101010
$"17&;&<·<™¥™_©¢©¥¥-$7&5)&:(+!9'&:$28&/@/&-@&,!:&…¥®™_·>#^%~~\™=™*™_¬¥¬¥™>™·¢$$$$$$……………
ERROR………
…
…
…
…
…
…
…

REVERTED
WHO IS THISreverted to TEMMIE

TEMMIE: hOI!!!!

fishbitch69: what the fuck just happebed

smoleboneboy: alright ok then sure sure why not

smoleboneboy: /showrecipients
Recipients:
smloleboneboy
fishbitch69
dapperdeadguy
fluffybuns
theorigjonalbadpun
notinnocentapparently
gay
thebiglongbone
mrrobokink
psychoplant
TEMMIE

fishbitch69: hold on

fishbitch69 changed dapperdeadguy to hotdeadguy

smoleboneboy: perfect

Chapter Text

smoleboneboy changed chat name to |hippity hop please god stop|

smoleboneboy: im dead oh no rip me

fishbitch69 entered |hippity hop please god stop|

fishbitch69: wassup

smoleboneboy: paps tell her

biglongbone entered |hippity hop please god stop|

biglongbone: IM GAY

fishbitch69: no shit sherlock

biglongbine: IM GAY FOR METTATON.

fishbitch69: yeah i jalhldfkjhas da fhadhfhjhH HFKUFASHDFDJSFHAUFHAADUFHFAH WHAT

fishbitch69 changed mrrobokink to PAPYTON1

fishbitch69 changed biglongbone to PAPYTON 2

PAPYTON 1 entered |hippity hop please god stop|

PAPYTON 1: Hey

smoleboneboy: oi frisk we need posters

notinnocentapparently entered |hippity hop please god stop|

notinnocentapparently: yes papyton posters and a papyton anime

notinnocentapparently: a papyton anime starring papyton as generic anime protagonists

smoleboneboy: "Metal and Bone: Gays with Swords"

notinnocentapparently: "Boning Metal: of bones and circuits"

PAPYTON 1 left |hippity hop please god stop|

PAPYTON 2 left |hippity hop please god stop|

Chapter Text

FRISK entered |hippity hop please god stop|

FRISK enabled VOICE TO TEXT

VOICE TO TEXT: {Speaking - FRISK} *Unintelligible*

VOICE TO TEXT: {Speaking - FRISK} look man all im saying is that they sell rocky rocky road

VOICE TO TEXT: {Speaking - unknown} and all im sayin is that i already have the flamethrower so are we gonna do this or what

FRISK disabled VOICE TO TEXT

~~~~~~~~~~~

UNDYNE: I’m gonna choose to ignore that.

UNDYNE: But where are you guys getting some of this stuff? i don’t see an option for voice to text.

ALPHYS: yeah… i dont have it either

ALPHYS: and asgore made a private channel to me once… i dont see that option either

SNAS entered |hippity hop please god stop|

SNAS: should be on the bottom left of your screen in the little orange box

ALPHYS: i dont have that… what phone are you using

UNDYNE: IS IT AN IBONE

SNAS: its the ibo

SNAS: beat me to it

PAPYRUS entered |hippity hop please god stop|

PAPYRUS: THAT’S NOT EVEN ORIGINAL

PAPYRUS: YOU JUST REPLACED PHONE WITH BONE!!!

SNAS: ;)

SNAS: paps do u have the option for private message

PAPYRUS: no… i only have three options

SNAS: what does ur UI have?

PAPYRUS: i have SEND, IMAGE, and HOT DIAL FOR THE OLD SPAGHETTI FACTORY

PAPYRUS: and my keyboard has a bunch of PICTURES OF MY FACE instead of letters

SNAS: …

ALPHYS: yeah haha i also changed my keyboard settings

ALPHYS: i got this app thats super cool it lets me use my own handwriting for each letter

ALPHYS: i can essentially make it look like im handwriting my texts so it has a little bit of personal flair and i can also make drawings and turn some letters in to little doodles and express my individuality and itsreallycoolbecauselikehalfofmyletterareanimethemednowanditsreallycoolyouguysshouldtryoutthisappits really interesting…

ALPHYS: …

PAPYRUS: WOWIE!!!

ALPHYS: …

ALPHYS left |hippity hop please god stop|

UNDYNE: She's so cute right

SNAS: ;)

PAPYRUS: ALPHYS COME BACK!

PAPYRUS: She must be so mortified right now!

PAPYRUS: Never fear! I, The GREAT Papyrus will offer her… MORAL SUPPORT!

PAPYRUS left |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE entered |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE: Respectfully… I’m in a meeting. Could you guys… wait to talk until after I finish?

UNDYNE: oh shit sorry bossman

ASGORE: Thank you.

ASGORE left |hippity hop please god stop|

SNAS: so asgore… what’s this meeting about?

ASGORE entered |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE: (sigh)

ASGORE: We’re discussing the incidents around growing monster populations with local officials. Now may I please have some peace?

ASGORE left |hippity hop please god stop|

SNAS: did you just type out sigh

SNAS: and put it in parenthesis…

ASGORE entered |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE: please…

TORIEL entered |hippity hop please god stop|

TORIEL: Let the children talk. If you’re so busy, why don’t you turn off notifications?

ASGORE: I… can do that?

TORIEL: Yes. Go to settings.

ASGORE: I see… Thank you.

ASGORE left |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE entered |hippity hop please god stop|

ASGORE: And… where are “Settings”?

TORIEL: Ridiculous.

TORIEL left |hippity hop please god stop|

UNDYNE: dont worry about it boss. she’ll come around.

UNDYNE: and if you click on the AssistiveTouch wheel, there should be a do not disturb button

ASGORE: I don’t know what the assistive touch wheel is.

UNDYNE: oh yeah… i only use it because i broke the home button

UNDYNE: the fingerprint sensor wasnt used to scales

SNAS: hehehehehehehehe

SNAS: fish

UNDYNE: good one. original

UNDYNE: also how do u do it shithead arent ur fingers made of bones

ASGORE: I’m just gonna power off my phone…

ASGORE lost connection to the server

SNAS: i use facial recognition. they took the home button out of the new model

UNDYNE: and facial recognition works for u?

SNAS: kinda… but its a bit racist

UNDYNE: oh?

SNAS: yeah we went to costume and display during halloween and it kept opening my email

UNDYNE: FUHUHUHUHU! Classic.

FRISK entered |hippity hop please god stop|

FRISK: did any of u guys hear that???

METTATON entered |hippity hop please god stop|

METTATON: Yes. It sounds like someone might be breaking into Alphys’s house again. I’ll head over.

SNAS: nah i think that’s just papyrus

SNAS: moral support and such…

METTATON: Ah… i should have recognized the Papyrus shaped hole in Alph’s Papyrus shaped window. I’ll leave them be.

METTATON: He’s very sweet though. I’m glad he’s there for alphys.

FRISK: heh

FRISK: heh

FRISK: heh

FRISK: Wait why does Alph need moral support?

SNAS: scroll up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FRISK: oh

FRISK: oh ok so the voice to text thing hahaha… it was just

FRISK: u know…

SNAS: i’m not gonna question it.

UNDYNE: i assume its about the chocolate chocolate chip thing?

FRISK: …

FRISK: we can’t keep letting them get away with it

UNDYNE: yeah… i’ll stay out of it. ill help if u need me tho.

FRISK: yes! The flavor revolution is upon us

SNAS: heh… good times. good times.

SNAS changed the chat name to |Good times.|

SNAS left |Good times.|

FRISK: Undyne, I’m gonna borrow that ladle again. I’ll be over in 20 seconds.

FRISK left |Good times.|

UNDYNE: cool.

UNDYNE left |Good times.|

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FLOWEY left |Good times.|