Chapter Text
Even though she had survived the mission she felt nothing, like a ghost whose punishment was to aimlessly wander earth for eternity. As Kita was heading towards her house and passed the guards she thought of what she wanted at that moment and it was not even going to bed, supposing once she falls asleep would have nightmares in which she would see faces of all people she had slayed.
She’d killed and every time she tried to remember how many she felt a pang in her chest. Not saying that Konoha had suffered casualties and many wounded, one of them was Ino Yamanaka’s father and as medics had gotten to him they all had agreed that Inoichi demanded an immediate hospitalization. Luckily, Kakashi’s wound had turned out to be not threatening to his life and Kita’s uncle, Asuma was perfectly fine. Fight with Akatsuki members had cost all of them a lot of strength, currently Kita was on her chakra reserves and barely had managed to get home.
‘KITA!’ It was her mother’s voice. For all that time Manami had been awaiting her daughter returning home but Kita did not spare her a single look, neither did she hear her grandfather say to Manami, ‘I told you she would come back.’
‘Kita!’ Manami stood in front of her daughter and shook her gently, but still Kita did not look back, her eyes were fixed on her feet. ‘Kita, talk to me! Are you hurt?’ The girl only shook her head, then turned towards the staircase and headed to her room. ‘Kita!’ Manami called out after her, but the young kunoichi did not care. As she entered her room threw backpack and her armour onto the ground, allowed snakes to glide onto the floor and through open window outside for a hunt and she herself went to the bathroom however, even warm bath did not help. Nothing could help.
It was not the case Kita had not killed before, because she had killed Haku in Land of Waves but the boy had been dangerous and was the only one person she had killed in the past. Now, everything has changed. Kita was glad she could not sense any guard’s chakra at home, her grandfather must have ordered them to leave, that was one of the things Kita had always begged him for.
Silently, the black-haired kunoichi went downstairs to the kitchen and started rummaging through cabinets with food, but as she came across two bottles filled with a transparent liquid she changed her mind. Took them and went back to her room, for the first time that night Kita tasted alcohol and even if after one sip it seemed awful, after couple of others taste did not matter. Seconds later she felt heat starting to form in her throat and before she knew she emptied the first bottle and was not about to stop.
Kita crawled into her bed with the bottle in her hand and looked outside, wondered whether her friends were sleeping, if any of her teammates could fall asleep that night. After a short while she concluded that it had been her first mission, not Kakashi’s or her uncle’s, or anyone else, it’d been hers and it was for her to handle feelings and sense of guilt. ‘Kami fucking sama, you don’t exist, do you?’ she asked, looking at the ceiling while taking another sip from the bottle at the same time. One moment was enough as Kita closed her eyes and fell asleep, empty bottles of sake next to her.
No one bothered waking her up. Manami still remembered her first ANBU mission where she had had to kill many of the enemies, remembered impact it had had on her, she was aware that her daughter had also had to kill some of the shinobi and must have felt not only mentally but also physically exhausted. After all Kita and other Konoha shinobi that had taken part in the battle of Suna had had to face Akatsuki members, one of the most dangerous shinobi in the world.
Manami had decided to cancel all of her missions, if possible postpone them for later. Her daughter needed her although she might have not realised it yet, Manami knew simply being there for Kita would be a great help. The kunoichi was spending her spare time on finishing the Icha Icha Paradise and as usual, someone must have interrupted her, this time it was loud knocking on the door. ‘Coming!’ As Manami opened she saw a tall man wearing grey uniform and a cap with number 888-098. It was Ninja Postman.
‘I have a letter for Sarutobi Manami,’ he informed, giving the white envelope with Manami’s name and address to her.
‘Thank you.’ The postman half-bowed to her then ran to the streets in order to deliver the rest of the post.
Dear Manami,
Ohayo! It’s me, your old friend Jiraiya. Forgive me I haven’t been writing lately but I am extremely busy with doing research for my new book which I hope you will like once it’s published. I am about to visit Konoha soon and I thought I should let you know. However, this is not really the case why I’m writing to you.
I’m sorry to be the one telling you this, but I’ve heard rumours Orochimaru’s still alive and there are suspicions he might arrive in Konoha. Unfortunately, I don’t know his reasons. He might want to visit you both, if I find out more I’ll certainly let you know.
Your friend,
Jiraiya
Manami creased the letter with anger and threw it away onto the ground and without hesitation she left for Hokage headquarters, she had to inform her father about what Jiraiya had written, she had to warn him.
If Orochimaru was indeed planning to arrive in Konoha certainly he was going to do that undercover, otherwise it’d be known to others and would be a clear provocation for war. What did he want and why was he coming? Those questions worried Manami as she was running towards the centre of the village to her father.
*
Kita woke up with a terrible headache, after last night she did not remember much and that was her goal: to not remember what had happened. Unfortunately, once she looked at the empty sake bottles next to her she recalled everything, she had returned from the mission and drunk sake she had found in the kitchen cabinets. She hoped no one had come in and seen what she had done, drinking alcohol before being twenty was illegal and as Hokage’s granddaughter and ANBU captain’s daughter she would be stigmatized for sure, because even if you were a very important person to Konoha you were not above the law.
Cold shower definitely helped, headache passed and Kita felt much better. After having two bottles of booze her sensor skills were weakened and could not feel chakra of anybody at home. She hoped that indeed, nobody was at home so she could have it all to herself but soon, the reminder of responsibility hit her as she remembered that there was a person in the village waiting for her to return and take care of her, Sagyo Naoko. ‘Okay, get dressed and have to report to grandpa,’ Kita counted in her head things she had to do, ‘go to Naruto and pick Naoko up. What about her? I can’t take care of her. Gosh Kita, look at yourself. You’re drunk,’ she thought, looking at her reflection in the mirror as she had put a white t-shirt, black shorts and blue sandals on. Her flak jacket and hitai-ate had been airly left on the chair at Kita’s desk when she had come home last night, at the thought of returning home all memories from the battle returned. ‘KITA, GET THE SCROLL AND RUN FOR KONOHA, NOW!’ Ibiki bellowed as Kita had been fighting what had had left of Akatsuki’s support. Screams, clangs of kunai and shuriken, groans of pain as shinobi had been falling dead onto the ground – all of them resounded in Kita’s head, images appeared in front of her eyes. The fire burning Sunagakure, flood that had been a result of using Water Jutsu by many shinobi, people lying dead on the streets, with children amongst them.
Kita rubbed her eyes and reluctantly grabbed her flak jacket where she had hidden the Scroll in, and still had a stamp her grandfather had given to her before her setting off on a mission. That day, she had completely lost the track of time as she had had so many on her mind that had forgotten to give it back, now there was occasion. Kita looked around the room in search for her snakes but Shi and Seikatsu were nowhere to be seen, ‘Did they go hunt again? Do they have to eat constantly? Ugh! Savages!’
It was early afternoon in Konohagakure, every inhabitant was living their life: some selling goods in their stores or in the streets, kids were running around laughing loudly enough to give Kita a headache. Above her on the in the backdrop of clear blue sky Kita saw a brown-haired boy having painted red cheeks and a small white dog by his side, ‘Let’s go Akamaru!’ The boy was Inuzuka Kiba, who alongside with Kita had attended the Academy and became genin the very same year Kita had been allowed to join Kakashi’s team, as she had received genin title six years earlier than her peers however, her grandfather had decided for Kita to remain at the Academy. That was one of the things Kita was unable to forget and at the same time, forgive him. The other thing was banishing Kita’s father from Konoha.
‘Ohayo, Kita-chan!’
The voice was sweet and familiar and Kita knew it belonged to somewhere she knew. For a while she was scanning the surroundings searching for the owner and then she saw her: the pink-haired kunoichi waving at her from the other side of the street. Kita waved back and shouted, explaining, ‘I’m going to report to Hokage! I came back from the mission last night!’
‘Oh, alright! See you later!’
Kita wandered towards the Hokage headquarters, thinking of Team 7 and Kakashi sensei. ‘I’m not your sensei here. You can call me Kakashi,’ Hatake had said while they were travelling to Suna. Receiving the flak jacket was a sign of becoming a chunin, but Kita hadn’t been properly promoted, she had had only received the jacket. Would she have to give it back?
Cacophony of sounds was coming to her from all sides, now it was impossible for her to distinguish people’s voices and recognise if someone was saying anything to her.
‘Here’s the Scroll of Shodaime.’
Kita had put it on the desk in front of her grandfather then started rummaging in her pockets to find something else, ‘And here’s the stamp you’ve given me last time. I know I should’ve turned it back earlier but there was so much going on that day –‘ Hokage stopped her talking with one hand gesture.
‘Understandable. I’m quite surprised you’ve managed to get it,’ Hiruzen said, examining the Scroll then put it down. Kita frowned her eyebrows in confusion, so why had she been sent to Suna? She had done everything she had been able to in order to get the Shodaime’s Scroll before the battle with Akatsuki had started. Luckily, no one had suspected anybody amongst Konoha shinobi to steal the Scroll, Suna had been convinced it had been Akatsuki.
‘But – that was exactly the point of sending me on that mission, right?’ Kita asked, confused.
‘Not really, that was only one of the reasons why I decided to send you.’
‘Care to explain, Hokage-sama?’
Kita wasn’t sure what she was supposed to make of it, had she been even needed there or had she been only sent to Suna as a decoy? Myriad of possibilities were crossing her mind, but she was unable to come with any reasonable answer as she was more concentrated on standing straight on her feet and not falling onto the floor. From time to time, she felt nausea and came away with the impression that her body was swinging both sides. Even though she had been offered to sit down she preferred to stand, worried that she would be unable to get up later.
‘I wanted to make sure I’ve made right decision in choosing you for Chunin. I’m sorry for all those years you had spent in the Academy but I believed -,’ Hiruzen stopped there, then looked up at his granddaughter and saw astonishment on her face, Kita couldn’t believe he was actually apologising to her for his past actions. ‘I believed you would become like your father and I didn’t want you to. I was afraid if you’d join a team early you might – develop even more as a shinobi.’
‘And this would be a bad thing because -?’
‘Because you’re only thirteen years old now and already know more techniques than even some Jonins. Have you ever counted them? How many techniques you know?’ That made Kita think she actually had never counted them, but didn’t hide she felt good being praised by her grandfather, the very Hokage. ‘And you’re ONLY thirteen. You learnt most of them for all those years you spent in the Academy –‘
‘I’ve learned them on my own, or with you or with –‘ With what, Kita? With scrolls you’ve found hidden in the attic? The very same scrolls with forbidden jutsu formulas? Are you – are you really gonna tell him?’ she thought.
‘I know, but you spent that time on learning not completing missions.’
‘Wait, are you saying that you not letting me become a proper genin was all because you wanted me – to learn more than I’d have known if I had already been sent on missions when I was seven or eight?’ Kita said out loud, squinting her eyes in wonder, her thinking process was very slow due to alcohol from last night.
Hiruzen nodded, ‘That’s right.’
‘But it doesn’t explain why you were afraid that I’d become like dad. Wasn’t he even further where I am right now at my age?’
‘No, he wasn’t.’
‘See, that’s – wait, what?’ Kita turned her eyes away from the window onto her grandfather, she was convinced she had misheard him. Hiruzen was leaning on his crossed palms and watched every move of his granddaughter.
‘He wasn’t. You’re definitely much further as a shinobi than he was at your age and I’m not talking here about your rank but abilities and knowledge. Use them well but for now, go home and have a rest. You won’t be given any mission for next two weeks, I think.’
‘Why?’
‘It takes time to pull oneself together after taking part in war fight, I know something about it. Your mother was no younger than you when she started serving in ANBU corps and had to suddenly kill people, I remember trauma it caused to her so if you even want to talk –‘
‘Thanks but –‘
‘You can come to me, you know I will always have time for you.’ Hiruzen gave her a kind smile and as about Kita was to leave his office he said, ‘Before you leave I want to ask you,’ Kita came to a halt, the door was already opened. ‘Are you drunk?’
His voice suddenly from the warm one had turned deadly serious, Hiruzen was not looking at his granddaughter with sympathy in his eyes any longer but anger.
‘No.’ It would be understatement to say that Kita had felt ashamed of her act, she felt more than that. She couldn’t imagine how she looked like in her grandfather’s eyes right now, was it that visible she was drunk? However, was sure of one thing: she must have looked pathetic.
‘This is my first and final warning: one more time I see you drunk and smell alcohol from you I swear –‘
‘It’ll never happen again. I’m sorry,’ Kita said with her head lowered, her gaze fixed on the floor refusing to look up on the person before her who sounded deeply disappointed. ‘Gomenasai.’
‘Kita, you know very well what kind of punishment you meet while being caught on drinking alcohol if you’re under twenty one years old.’
‘I know, gomenasai. I promise it’ll never happen again.’
‘I understand last mission left an impact on you but this is not how you should deal with it.’
‘I’m sorry grandpa, I really am. I just – I didn’t know what to do!’ It happened, Kita’s voice broke and tears which for a long time she had been trying so desperately to stop were now streaming down her face. ‘I can’t stop seeing those images of dead people everywhere, I can hear their screams in my head and – and –,‘ Before Kita managed to say any more her grandfather had approached and hugged her, she was now crying in his arms. ‘Please, don’t send me on a mission like that ever again. Please.’
Hiruzen did not reply, knowing if it would be needed he would have to send Kita again. It was one of the shinobi’s tasks: to fight for their village and their allies, sacrificing for the village was for many the most honourable way to die but as he knew his granddaughter, it was not how she saw things. In those matters, she resembled him more of Orochimaru than Manami. From the very young age, Kita was convinced that dying for the village was pointless.
‘Grandpa, before I go there’s something I’d like to ask you about.’
‘Talk to me when you’re sober.’
*
Kita stood in front of the wooden door sensing two familiar chakra signatures inside, she could also hear the boy shouting, that was when she knocked. The shouts stopped and after a while the door was opened by Naruto Uzumaki who upon seeing Kita grinned wide and threw his hands around her, ‘KITA-CHAN, YOU’RE BACK!’ Kita thought her head would explode, did Naruto have to be always that loud?
‘Yes, yes, I am.’
‘Kita-neechan!’ The sweet girly voice resounded behind Naruto’s back, the boy stepped aside letting Naoko pass. She ran towards Kita and hugged her tight, calling with joy and tears in her brown eyes, ‘You’re back, you’re back!’
The kunoichi smiled, caressing Naoko’s hair then said softly, ‘I told you I will. How have you been? Both of you. Any troubles?’ she asked Naruto this time, Uzumaki grinned and scratched his head before explained how last five days had been for both of him and Naoko. It turned out that Naoko had met Konohamaru and even Sasuke and Sakura, the latter seemed very fond of her.
‘And you know I did everything as you told me, I was buying her food and picked her up from the Academy –‘
‘Naruto-neesan even let me train with him!’ Kita raised her eyebrows in amazement then smiled at her best friend who immediately went pink. Kita was glad Naruto turned out to be responsible and bravely faced up to the task.
‘But, you see Kita-chan,’ Naruto said timidly, touching his thumbs and index fingers together as he tried to finish his sentence however, it seemed as if Naruto didn’t know how to say what he wanted to say, so he simply stepped farther away letting Kita see his flat. The Sarutobi girl’s jaw dropped, the whole flat looked as if tornado came through it, ‘She destroyed my flat and um – I have no money to pay for repair.’ Some of the furniture was broken in half, other completely destroyed, water was leaking out from the sink onto the floor, doors from kitchen cabinets barely hung in hinges. In shock, Kita looked at standing next to her Naoko who blushed.
‘Y-You? Y-You did this?’ Kita let out, unable to believe her eyes. How such a little person could probably have caused so much damage? Either Naoko must have possessed abilities Kita was not aware of or simply Naruto was lying, but Kita didn’t believe her best friend would ever lie to her. ‘What the hell?’ she thought, not looking away from Naoko who was still staring onto the floor. ‘I’ll pay for the damage, Naruto-kun but - but how did it happen?’
Kita was sure there must have been something that would trigger Naoko in order to destroy Uzumaki’s flat. ‘Well, I just left for a moment and when I came back I saw this! It happened not so long time ago. Today.’ Just when I returned,’ Kita thought, letting out a heavy sigh.
‘I left all my money at home. I give them to you tonight when I just – try to figure this all out,’ Kita looked around Naruto’s flat or rather what’s been left of it. ‘I still haven’t received payment for my mission yet but it should cover the repair. Naoko, what do you say to Naruto?’ Uzumaki looked at the Sagyo girl who mumbled under her breath however, it did not satisfy Kita, ‘Naruto couldn’t hear you Naoko, you must speak up.
‘Gomen.’
‘We’re leaving, Naoko. Naruto, thanks for taking care of her when I was gone.’
‘Ah, no problem. Everything for my friends!’ Uzumaki replied, grinning and scratching his head once more. Kita shut the door behind her and Naoko then scolded the Sagyo girl for damage she had caused.
‘Why did you do that? What happened?’ Kita was asking, disoriented. She had never been more confused in her lifetime than that day. Naruto always was kind to her and when Kita had left Naoko to him to take care of her she had been sure it’d be Naruto to mess up things, not the other way around. Kita was not feeling disappointed of Naoko but rather hurt and guilty because Naruto had trusted her and now she felt as if she lost that trust.
‘I don’t know. I was just – I was crying because I remembered my parents and – and I couldn’t control it! It’s just happened! Please Kita-neechan,’ Naoko fell onto her knees, pulling Kita’s hand with such a force that the latter almost stumbled, ‘I’ll try to not do it ever again! Just please Kita-neechan, don’t make me go back to the streets!’ Kita raised her eyebrows in astonishment as tears were streaming down Naoko’s face.
‘Why does everybody think I’m that cruel?’ she asked pretentiously, looking around as if she was trying to find a person responsible for the way people saw her. ‘I would never allow that! Get up and let’s go. We have to get money for Naruto.’
Kita felt better before the evening, her mother had greeted her in the front door surprised with the view of a girl she had never seen before, especially because she was with her daughter. ‘Mum, can you prepare Naoko something for dinner? She sleeps in my room tonight and I promise I will explain everything to you, I’ll tell you everything but I must hurry.’ Kita kissed her mother on the cheek and Manami blushing and smiling looked at Naoko then invited her in, her daughter was nowhere to be seen.
Kita had pulled out all savings she had, almost bursting into tears. She had been planning on buying new weaponry but as it’d turned out, that dream would have to wait. She had no idea how much it’d cost to rebuild Naruto’s flat and buy new furniture or repair the old one, wasn’t sure if the amount of money she currently had was enough so hastily, she headed towards the Hokage’s headquarters to receive her payment for the mission in Suna.
Knock. Knock.
Silence.
Knock. Knock.
Still silence.
Kita did not care that ANBU guards were standing next to her, she started banging onto the door as if it was the emergency. The two masked men looked down at her, wondering how possibly she could have so much strength. ‘Come in, Kita!’ All of them heard the Hokage’s voice behind the door.
‘Finally, I knew you were in here. Why didn’t you let me -,’ Kita came to a halt as she had seen the white-haired Jonin standing back to her in front of her grandfather who was currently at his desk and indeed, was during conversation with Hatake Kakashi, ‘in?’
‘We were during an important conversation about the mission in Suna. Kakashi was just telling me about your fight with Uchiha Itachi, extraordinary I must say!’ Kita blushed having been praised by her grandfather for the second time that day. She hoped it would happen more often from now on. Maybe if she would complete more dangerous missions he would promote her to Jonin earlier? At least, that what she hoped.
‘Thank you, Obajiisan.’ Kita bowed low to her grandfather with a smile, her spirits lifted up immediately and she felt, what she had been thinking she would not feel for a long time after latest events in Suna, which was happiness. ‘Your words mean a lot to me.’
Hiruzen smiled back at her, his heart joyed for the view in front of his eyes. Kita tend to smile rarely, for long time he had been thinking she would have never smile to him ever again, but here they were in his office both with smile on their faces.
‘I see you’re feeling better,’ Sandaime said and Kita’s smiled vanished to be replaced with shame on her face. Evidently, Hiruzen and his granddaughter were so deeply immersed in their conversation that they had completely forgotten Kakashi who was being in the office as well and casually listened to each word that was spoken. ‘That’s why I’d like to propose you accompanying me while I’m opening the Scroll.’
‘You mean -,’ Kita’s eyes almost fell out of their orbits. ‘You want me to – You will let me –,’ her shock was so great that Kita was unable to form a proper sentence. The Hokage laughed, nodding. ‘Thank you so much! And oh, I came for my money.’
‘Sure. Go to the bank.’
‘WHAT?! But I – I need them now!’ Hiruzen said no word, only blinked awaiting an explanation. Kita sighed, lowering her head with thought she would have to tell her grandfather everything. As to came to her to think of it, she had never gone to the bank to receive payment for any of her missions. Then, she remembered something else what she had to inform her grandfather about, which was also directly connected to money issue. ‘Remember Naoko?’ Hiruzen nodded affirmatively. ‘Well, I left her with Naruto when I was gone.’
‘Oh, yes. I may have heard something of that.’
Kita squinted her eyes. He always knows everything but never want to say anything. Jiji… ‘Well, it turns out that she has some kind of powers and has destroyed his flat! I promised to pay for the damage.’
‘How big is this damage?’
‘Like someone detonated a bomb. There’s literally nothing left besides the walls, even the ceiling is damaged. Can you help me out?’ This time it was Hiruzen who sighed. He pulled out his ID card and wrote a permit for Kita to receive his money.
‘They’re closing the bank soon. Go to the bank,’ Kita was looking at him, pleading. ‘I’m not your bank, go to the bank!’
‘But you always –‘
‘I SAID GO TO THE BANK, DAMN IT!’ It felt as if the wind blew in her face, such loud and impressive Sandaime’s voice was. Kita squealed and without further notice left immediately leaving Kakashi and Hiruzen to resume their talk. ‘I apologise. You were saying?’
‘Hai. Not only yours techniques Hokage-sama but Jiraiya-sama’s and of course –‘
‘Orochimaru’s too, huh?’ Hatake nodded. ‘Have you copied them?’ Even though he has no reason to Kakashi seemed startled with the old Sarutobi’s question.
‘Hokage-sama, there was no time for that. We were fighting distances away. Besides, how’s she coping after all that happened? She doesn’t seem distressed, as you told me earlier.’ For a moment Hiruzen dwelled on the question whether he should tell Kita’s ex-sensei about her coping mechanism but decided not to. Instead, he led conversation towards completely different direction after answering, ‘She’s doing alright now as we both could see. Well, I assume you know that Kita’s received the jacket which means she’s not member of your team any longer.’
‘Hai, Hokage-sama.’
‘Of course, usually there should be elders for the ceremony and she should have passed the Chunin exam as it always was in the past, but my conscious did not let me sleep for last week, as this mission was approaching I was wondering whether I should send her or not, it gave me sleepless nights. Kakashi, tell me as a Jonin how would you rate her skills?’
‘Rate her skills?’ Hatake wondered for a moment and it was difficult for him to decide on what basis he could even rate them. Kita’s jutsu were advanced, not a Genin nor a Chunin could perform them, Kakashi doubted that even a Jonin would be capable of it.
‘I don’t know, Hokage-sama. We’ve seen a lot but I have a hunch she hasn’t shown us everything yet, so it’s difficult for me to say how I would rate her skills. However, if I have to say she’s an excellent kunoichi. Of course, it shouldn’t be surprising if she has been trained by you in person.’
‘Not only me but also her father and Jiraiya.’
‘Hokage-sama,’ Hatake turned to Kita’s grandfather once again and couldn’t help but ask, ‘what’s with Naoko, the girl Kita had left Naruto with?’
‘Do you remember the Sagyos?’
‘Of course, how could I forget Ashuna and Samara?’ Hatake thought of the faces of two always kind and smiling persons that were both now dead, they had never returned from the mission alive. It had turned out they had been murdered as ANBU had discovered their already decomposing bodies. Both of them, Ashuna and Samara Sagyo, had been excellent shinobi, one of the best in Konoha.
‘Well, my granddaughter found their daughter on the streets and took her in and now, she’s dealing with consequences.’
‘Oh, I see.’ Kita was full of contradictions but so were her parents. Once Kakashi saw her fighting to death then, on the next day like a while ago she smiled with joy as if nothing had ever happened. And that strength, he had almost had a heart attack as he had heard Kita’s banging onto the door. Kakashi knew Kita was not a monster, as some people who might have known about her father identity could have been thinking, she was only lost. But so had been he while being a teenager suddenly left without a father who had committed suicide. Better not to remember the father than lose him in such cruel circumstances,’ Kakashi thought.
With a big smile on her face Kita was just leaving the bank with three heavy pouches filled with money in her both hands. She had had no idea she actually had so much money and for a while thought she didn’t have to wait for another mission to receive payment and buy herself a katana she was dreaming so much about, but then still had no clue how much the renovation of Naruto’s flat would cost. The Sarutobi sighed loudly, looking around and was about to head towards Naruto’s when she heard behind her back a boy yelling her name, ‘KITA-IOKO!’ Having recognised the chakra signature immediately however, unfortunately Kita did not manage to dodge and fell onto the ground with a little boy on her back.
‘Konohamaru.’
‘I was looking for you everywhere! I’ve heard you’re a chunin now.’ Not knowing why Konohamaru was pouting and how he had found out of his cousin’s promotion Kita was unsure what to say.
‘How did you –‘
‘Ebisu told me.’
‘Ah and you must be jealous, huh?’ Kita raised her eyebrow but Konohamaru was still sitting onto the ground back to her. ‘Get up, you’re blocking the way. People are walking here, you know?’ Kita pushed him gently but it looked like Konohamaru wasn’t about to get up any time soon. ‘Listen, if you came here only to show me your jealousy you should go home. Isn’t it past your bedtime?’ asked Kita, passing Konohamaru as she decided to change direction and head towards her grandfather’s office. She supposed her cousin might have followed her to Naruto’s and then no one would be left alone for the rest of the night.
‘HOW DARE YOU?!’ Konohamaru threw himself at Kita’s back trying to catch her neck, but his older cousin was faster. She made a graceful turn around and kneeled, smiling with her eyes closed.
‘I’m just teasing.’ Kita was tousling Konohamaru’s hair smiling at him all the time. ‘I have to go. Go home.’
‘Kita-ioko!’ As Kita had already turned around on her heel and was about to take a step forward she felt two hands around her both legs not wanting to let go of her person. Kita looked down and what she saw shocked her beyond words, Konohamaru was sobbing. ‘Kita-ioko, I’ve heard Ebisu-sama and Jiji saying. I thought you wouldn’t come back.’
‘But I am, I am back Konohamaru. Why are you crying?’ Kita kneeled down again, this time with concern in her eyes. Am I really that important to people?’ she thought, as Konohamaru was gritting his teeth and continued to cry. ‘Am I really that important to him? Konohamaru…’
‘Because you’re the only one I have! And – and we don’t spend much time together like we should! Jiji always says we are family and – I know he says you’re busy and – everybody’s busy! NO ONE HAS TIME FOR ME!’
‘That’s true, I’ve been extremely busy lately. I have to go to grandpa now to talk to him about something but if you want, we can meet tomorrow and - play ninja.’ Kita barely could say it, she hated playing ninja with Konohamaru but if he was in such a miserable state someone had to spare him some of their time. As their grandfather had said, they were family and family members always support each other.
‘Really? You – you’ll do that?’ asked Konohamaru, wiping tears off his face.
‘For you? Sure. Unless you don’t want to.’ Say yes, say yes, say yes please.
Surprisingly, Konohamaru grinned and scratched his head in a manner Kita knew very well. That was when it struck her, Konohamaru was wearing green goggles the same one that Naruto had used to wear while in the Academy. ‘Honestly, I think I’m too old for playing ninja already!’ he laughed, showing his white teeth. ‘Can we train together?’
‘Train?’
‘Yes! You see, you’re the best and everybody knows that. You could fight Ebisu with one finger and you’d win,’ Konohamaru folded arms across his chest, standing up firmly not looking like the crying kid from before. ‘Jiji has no time and I’ll never train anything with Ebisu.’
‘Ebisu trained me, too.’
‘See, that’s – wait, what?! That pervert trained you, too?!’ Konohamaru yelled, pointing finger at his cousin, shocked. Kita yet again could not suppress her tick and raised one eyebrow in astonishment, ‘Ebisu a pervert?’ she thought, already nodding affirmatively to Konohamaru. ‘I really have to talk to jiji about assorting a new teacher. So, will you train me?’ Konohamaru grinned once again, his face was only millimetres away from Kita’s.
‘Sure, why not? I trained Naruto, I can train you too.’
‘You trained Naruto-neesan?’ As soon as Kita nodded Konohamaru’s eyes shone dangerously bright in excitement, he was in heaven. ‘I’ll be coming tomorrow! Goodnight, Kita-ioko! Thank youuuuuuu!’ he called out to her, waving goodbye from distance already running towards his and uncle Asuma’s house. Kita could not help but chuckle, for a while wondered if she could go to Naruto’s now but decided to go to her grandfather first as she was already near his headquarters.
‘Still here?’ she asked, surprised upon seeing Kakashi. He was still talking to Hiruzen, whether it was about their latest mission Kita didn’t know and honestly, she didn’t really care. ‘I’m sorry to disturb you both, but I’m going now and I just wanted to ask the question from today’s morning, remember?’ Kita looked at her grandfather, not really paying Kakashi any notice.
‘What question?’
‘Uchiha Itachi. He told me something last time and I wondered. He said I didn’t know the whole truth when I called him a murderer. He told me to ask you, because you can tell stories. Would you explain to me what’s going on? No offence, but it sounds as if I was misinformed and I looked like an idiot in front of him.’
‘Hmm.’ Hiruzen closed his eyes for a while, hearing Kakashi trying to leave but Hokage wanted him to stay. Kita felt as if she would throw a tantrum in there, why was her grandfather ordering Kakashi to stay? It was their private conversation, why would he be there as well?
‘Well?’
‘Uchiha Itachi has been ordered to kill all of his clan members by Land of Fire daimyo.’ The pouches and Hiruzen’s ID card Kita had been holding fell onto the ground. ‘He was an ANBU captain at that time, and everyone knew how good shinobi he was. When I found out about the plans I tried to talk to Danzo, the daimyo of Land of Fire and talk him out of it but I couldn’t do anything. Nothing I said seemed to have any impact, my opinion wouldn’t matter. It was too late.
‘I assume you know Sasuke’s the only one who survived. Nobody knew why, the truth is Itachi begged Danzo for sparing his little brother. That’s why it was done before nightfall when Sasuke was at school, so he wouldn’t have to watch his brother murdering everybody in front of his eyes. That kind of trauma would destroy Sasuke completely, and Itachi had a heart to not let it happen. He loved Sasuke above all.’
Kita was so attentively listening to the story that she did not even notice she had caught the edge of the chair to stand still, it was not the alcohol from last night but shock her grandfather’s words caused to her. ‘What – what are you saying? I don’t – I don’t understand,’ she said after a while as everything became clear to her: Itachi was not a traitor. ‘And you haven’t done anything to stop it?’
‘I told you I tried.’
‘With daimyo! But when you returned to the village, did you try to stop Itachi?’
‘No.’
‘Why?’ How could he be that brutally honest with her right now? He just had told her possibly the most important secret of the village and all spoken by him words seemed to not move him in any way, he seemed so calm. ‘Why didn’t you? Why?’ Kita believed there was an important reason for that.
‘Because, if daimyo found out we’d stop receiving mission motions.’ Kita did not raise her eyebrows this time, she knew she should have cried but something inside made her burst into laughter. With the corner of his eye, Kakashi observed and listened whereas Hokage was sitting at his desk seeming emotionless.
‘That – that was the reason?!’ Kita was unable to stop laughing, tears were forming in her eyes but not because of laughter. Even though her body was reacting in a shocking way, the voice inside her head was screaming, ‘HOW COULD YOU?! THAT WAS YOUR REASON, YOU OLD SCUM?! HOW COULD YOU?! HE WAS MY FRIEND! I FUCKING HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!’
‘There is something else you should know about.’ Those words caused Kita laughter to stop, there were just tears left in her eyes ready to fall any minute now, if Hiruzen would say something even more ridiculous and horrifying at the same time that pertained to Itachi’s past, why he had left the village she was sure she would not hold them.
‘What?’
‘When you were born, actually it had been decided since your mother had turned out to be pregnant, yours and Itachi’s father made an agreement according to which you were both betrothed.’
That was too much to take in. Kita clenched her fists until they went white and furious banged them onto the wooden desk, making everything that was placed on it jump, ‘Betrothed?! What does it mean we were both betrothed?!’
‘It means –‘
‘I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!’ Kita felt as if her whole life had just started to tumbledown. Was she even able to control it or had everything been actually already planned for her and no matter, what she would do the outcome would always turn out the same?
The young kunoichi felt more than betrayed, she felt cheated and hurt.
‘Don’t take your anger out on me, young lady. It was your father’s idea.’
‘My father’s idea?’ Kita repeated, still unconvinced. She wanted to believe her grandfather was lying to her but as a sensor shinobi she felt no chakra fluctuations in his body which meant one thing: Hiruzen was not lying.
Hokage nodded, ‘He was the one to offer you his first to be born daughter to be married to Uchiha Itachi, he had been already born you see. Your mother agreed, Itachi’s parents did too –‘
‘Mum agreed?’ Hiruzen didn’t repeat what he had already said, having seen pain on his granddaughter’s face he couldn’t go on. ‘My mum agreed?’ Kita almost choked on tears. ‘How – How could she?’ Kakashi was listening to whole conversation and wished he hadn’t been there. It wasn’t the thing he wanted to find out about his ex-girlfriend.
Sandaime lay hand on his granddaughter’s shoulder then said to her calmly, ‘Kita, your mother has been madly in love with your father and would do anything for him. I shouldn’t be telling you this –‘
‘But?’
‘Manami always had a soft spot for Orochimaru.’ Kita felt tears streaming down her face, she was unable to look up at her grandfather from shame she felt towards herself. It felt like a betrayal, like everything was a lie.
Not wanting to cry in front of neither her grandfather nor Kakashi, Kita took her pouches from the floor then jumped out the window and in the blink of an eye was gone.
‘Leave her,’ Hatake heard as he was about to follow the girl.
‘But Hokage-sama we don’t know what she’s about to do. Teenagers and angst do not go well with each other.’
‘I know but she needs space and I feel as if I’ve taken too much of it away from her. She knew I had her being watched, that I hid the truth from her sometimes, she has right to be furious with me or her mother. I’d be furious, too.’
‘Forgive me Hokage-sama but I don’t think I quite understand. Why should she be furious?’
‘Kakashi, tell me how would you feel if your remembered your father from the earliest period of your childhood and suddenly, there was a big black hole in your memories? If you had questions that could be answered and had people who could answer them around as well, but for some reason they wouldn’t want to and explain to you why?’
‘I’d be furious.’
‘Kita does not believe anything I tell her of her father, because I tell her as I knew him, not as she remembers him, moreover my daughter never speaks of him. Never. Like he had never existed but I know she remembers, she just simply doesn’t want to. Kita remembers him only as he wanted her to remember him, an ideal parent.’
‘Lord Hokage, if the truth must be told Orochimaru wasn’t a bad father after all. Even Jiraiya-sama himself said –‘
‘Jiraiya says many things, mainly speaks before he thinks. I know Orochimaru wasn’t a bad father but he was not a good man either.’
*
Kita stood in front of the wooden door to one of the flats located on the third floor. She could feel warm breeze on her back and hot tears she was shedding from a long time on her way there. She knocked on the door thrice, sobbing but didn’t get any reply from inside. She started to knock louder, knowing the person she wanted to see was inside but probably was deep asleep and wouldn’t open to her. Resigned, she touched the door with her forehead, continuing to sob loudly and suddenly heard the door unlock.
The boy standing in the threshold wiped his eyes and blinked before he realised who was standing in front of him. ‘Kita-chan, what happened?’ he asked, seeing the miserable state his best friend was in.
‘N-Naruto-kun, can I come in?’ she let out, almost whispering. Naruto had never heard her talk so quiet before, her voice was breaking.
Uzumaki opened the door ajar and let Kita in. His flat was messy but Kita didn’t care, she just wanted to be hugged by someone who would understand and listen.
‘Wait here, I’ll make you some green tea. It’s your favourite, right?’ Kita nodded, trying her best to pull herself together. If not her sobs Naruto’s flat would be a quiet place and he himself would be still asleep. She scolded herself in her mind for coming there and waking him up in the first place, before she knew Naruto offered her a mug of warm tea he’d just made and lay his hands on hers.
‘Kita-chan, what happened?’ Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?’ he asked with concern, examining her puffy eyes.
‘You know I was sent on a mission with ANBU and Kakashi sensei and – some other shinobi as you know. We were supposed to help Suna because they were about to be attacked by Akatsuki. They were after Kazekage’s son. Naruto, you can’t tell anyone about this, especially Sasuke.’ Uzumaki nodded but before Kita managed to continue Naruto had to ask, ‘Kita-chan, but what is Akatsuki?’
‘Akatsuki is a criminal organisation to which Sasuke’s brother belongs to.’
‘Sasuke’s brother? You mean the one who –‘
‘Killed the whole Uchiha clan, yes Naruto. Me and Itachi had used to be friends –‘
‘Yes, you said something about that at the beginning. Hey, was it that what’d made Sasuke so angry that he tried to attack you?’ Kita sighed loudly, Naruto was constantly interrupting her and she didn’t want to scream at him after all he had done for her and besides, she was mentally and physically exhausted. She was sure that if somebody had decided to attack Konoha that night she would have died of running out of chakra. ‘I’m sorry, please continue Kita-chan.’
‘I feel like my whole life is a lie, Naruto. As if everything was planned and I have no control over it, I don’t want to live like that. I’m not sure if I even want to live anymore.’ Naruto got up abruptly with hurt on his face and in his eyes then decisively told her, clenching his fists with anger:
‘Don’t say that, Kita-chan! How can you say that?! And what about me, your family?! Sakura and Sasuke?! What about Naoko?! You promised to take care of her and now you’d leave her like that?!’
But Kita did not reply, only continued to stare at the wooden floor of Naruto’s destroyed flat. He was sleeping now only on tatami that had left him as one of not many things after Naoko’s tantrum.
‘Kita-chan?’ Naruto sat down next to her, laying his arm on Kita’s shoulder. He was looking into her empty eyes, Naruto was not sure if Kita knew she was still crying. ‘Why do you think everything has been planned for you?’ he wondered. Kita looked up at him miserably then finally decided to answer him,’ Because when I was born my family and the Uchihas made an agreement.’
‘Agreement?’
‘Yes, Naruto. Agreement according to which I was about to be Itachi’s wife.’