Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

    Metal screeched faintly on stone as a massive claymore dragged along the ground, pulled lazily behind its owner before being swung to their shoulder. The smell of ozone permeated the air as Diluc continued his descent into the Domain, leaving the fading remains of Hilichurls and Slimes in his wake.

    Two days prior he had received information from one of his informants; there was unusual activity in this Domain, and that the magic and energy that radiated from it was dark and concerning. If the Knights knew about it, they had done nothing; as such, Diluc decided to clear out the Domain on his own.

    The Domain was winding; narrow hallways with traps of moving lasers, spikes, and deep bottomless pits made his journey treacherous. It took effort and awareness to navigate safely, his progress frequently stopped by attacking groups of Hilichurls and Slimes. They were no threat to him, igniting in the face of his flames and succumbing swiftly to his blade in short order.

    No, they weren’t the issue; it was the slow growing fatigue he was beginning to feel weigh on his limbs that loomed as the larger concern. No room had been safe; either possessing some manner of death trap, or simply filled with hostile forces seeking to defeat him.

For a faint moment he began to wonder if, perhaps, he should have recruited help; like the Traveler, or someone from the adventurer’s guild.

    It was too late to turn back, though, so he settled for stopping to lean on his sword for a few silent minutes and rest his eyes and body. He would need to finish up quickly, so he could return to Mondstadt and recuperate in safety.

    He made his break brief and quickly resumed navigating the traps and rooms, fortunate in that none bore enemies who wished him harm. Still, his fatigue wore on him. With a sloppy shift of his weight, he accidentally moved into the range of a laser trap, which seared right through his coat and into his arm. He hit the ground with a pained grunt, gripping the burnt fabric of the arm of his coat with a soft swear. It wasn’t bleeding by virtue of being functionally cauterized, but it stung horribly.

It wasn’t his sword arm, thankfully, so it was fine. He could treat it later.

    He got to his feet slowly and cautiously slipped into the next room, which was by far the largest he had seen so far. No visible exits were immediately visible, and he could only surmise that he had finally reached the end of the Domain.

    He resisted the desire to exhale in relief, not allowing himself to lower his guard just yet; there were always exit portals at the end of Domains, yet one was nowhere to be seen. That meant that either there was still more Domain to explore, or something was keeping it sealed.

    He was a quarter of the way into the room when the doorway behind him sealed shut, and half a dozen Hilichurls and a Hydro Abyss Mage suddenly populated the room around him. With a soft tut, Diluc braced himself and charged.

    The Hilichurls were nothing more than an annoyance, their swings wild and easy to deflect, their smaller bodies sent flying with powerful sword strikes. No, the problem was the Abyss Mage. It was being smart, keeping itself at a distance from Diluc, which made his attempts at hitting it difficult.

    Unlike the one he had shoved skull first into the ground back in the Domain with Kaeya, this one had its shield up and was ready for him; Hydro shields laughed in the face of Pyro, no matter how hot it burned. He would get through it eventually, but he was already tired and the Hilichurls were a constant distraction; which made his job so much harder.

    The biggest obstacle he had to face was juggling dodging the attacks and bubbles of the Abyss Mage while simultaneously contending with the Hilichurls. He would cleave into one of his attackers, only to have to tuck and roll immediately lest he be struck himself. At least once he leapt directly into the wild swing of a Hilichurl as he avoided a burst of magic, feeling the club strike his body hard and send pain shooting through him.

    Diluc desperately wished for backup now, but it was too late to wallow in ‘should haves’ and simply steeled himself. He fought, taking them down one by one until it was just him, two battered Hilichurls, and the Abyss Mage. His legs were sluggish and his shoulders hurt, but he wasn’t out of the fight by any means. Pushing the discomfort from his mind he kicked from the ground in a massive swing, striking one of the two remaining Hilichurls and sending it flying. From the corner of his eye he watched it fall to the ground and not get back up, all as he rounded on the lone Hilichurl.

    It charged and swung madly, and Diluc took a hop back with his sword up to block the strike and prepared to counter attack-

    Only to feel the freezing wetness of fluid envelop him, immediately inhaling a mouthful of water and choking. He felt panic well up inside of him as he realized he had lost track of the Mage, and had been hit by one of the bubbles.

    His lungs burned; he had to move quickly before he drowned. Grasping desperately for his sword, his gloved hand found purchase on the handle and he swung hard, Pyro flaring and flash boiling water. The blade tore through the exterior film holding it together and the bubble popped.

    He hit the ground hard, soaked and vomiting up what he’d inhaled as he gasped for air. He grasped his sword again and snarled, hauling himself to his feet as he dripped with water, lifting his blade while his Vision flared.

    He was going to turn that Abyss Mage into a smear on the floor.

    With a hoarse yell he engulfed his sword in flame and slammed it down hard on his target, hitting the Mage’s shield with enough force that it shattered and sent the small being flying to bounce off the floor, dazed.

    Finally. Diluc needed to put an end to this before he succumbed to his fatigue. He began to approach, grabbing the face of the Hilichurl that tried to sneak up on him and slamming it bodily into the stone brickwork.

    Leaving the now unmoving foe where it lay, he lifted his sword and prepared to finish off the Mage.

    If the water from before was cold, this was freezing. It took him only an instant to understand what suddenly froze him to the bone and halted his movements. He felt ice engulf his form, stinging and painful and locking him in place as it encased his whole body, leaving him free only from the neck up.

    Two Cryo Abyss Mages popped into view, laughing with smug glee. He resolved to wipe that amusement off their faces just as soon as he could break himself loose. He struggled and forced himself against his bonds, feeling them faintly crack as his muscles strained.

    “Break free and you’ll just be encased in more ice; struggling is useless,” one of the Mages taunted as they floated over, the Hydro Mage having gotten its senses back enough to sit up on the ground, watching. He’d need to take it out before it brought its shield back up. “You should be honored, Master Diluc,” it continued to say, and the use of his name was enough to make him pay some semblance of attention to their jabbering.

    “You’ve fallen right into our hands, the fake intel we leaked did just the trick, just as we thought it would,” the other Mage patted itself on the back. “And you even came here all on your own; what a fool you are!”

    “Are you going to taunt me to death or what?” Diluc grumbled as he started a new bout of struggling, the ice cracking more.

    “Oh, we have no intention of killing you; if we did, we’d have run ice through your heart,” the Mage ‘assured’ in an annoyingly soothing tone. “No, no, we have grander plans for the Uncrowned King. What better agent is there to work for us?”

    Diluc stopped his struggling for a second as bafflement settled in. “What makes you think I have any intention of cooperating with you?”

    “Well, we know you would never do so willingly, of course,” one of the Mages said. Diluc had lost track of which was talking at this point; they all sounded similar to his apathetic ears.

    “We’ve prepared something special just for you, Master Diluc.” With a swirl of its hand, the Mage that had been talking summoned sickly purple-pink energy into its palm and floated over.

    Diluc’s struggle intensified and he didn’t care if the Mage could hear the cracking ice, his Vision flaring on his hip to match his darkening mood.

    “For all the trouble you have caused us, I assure you that I will take much pleasure in this process,” the Mage declared as it held the energy close to his face. “I will quite enjoy breaking your mind and re-molding you into our pawn.”

    Diluc didn’t have a chance to say anything and felt his body seize. The dark energy in the Mage’s hand was pushed delicately into his head, and immediately the room spun as his mind revolted. Diluc’s muscles tightened involuntarily as he tried to run from something incorporeal that gripped his heart and deepest seated fears, ripping them to the surface violently.

    It wasn’t coherent, but at the same time he was acutely aware of every single memory and thought that filled his head without his consent. The Mage held the magic in place as he felt his brain disobey him and supply the building blocks of his trauma.

    Father

    Kaeya

    Blood

    Ursa

    The Harbingers

    Betrayal

    Murder

    Patricide

    Horrid memories and sickening emotions flooded him in an overwhelming deluge that he could only barely stand, the dark magic doing its work as it began to take those memories and craft equally painful falsehoods.

    Father wasn’t the only one dead, now it was Kaeya too. Jean, by his hand- no, he would never- It was a fake, right?

    No, no, no, No. No. No. NO.

    Diluc could only scream as the pain of his heart and head grew into agony, grasping the last, faintest, thread of lucidity to act.

    None of the Mages expected him to suddenly break free, his Vision erupting in a blinding glow of red as the ice exploded into shards. His sword manifested in his hand and he charged for the Hydro Mage, running it through with a single blow.

    The two Cryo Mages screeched in alarm- or was that the scream of a dying Elzer in his memories?

    He turned, the flaming sword directed at the two Mages as the burning form of a phoenix manifested; with a swing it took flight, absolutely demolishing the shields and sending both Mages reeling to the ground.

    His vision started to darken, a red pulse around the edges of his sight, but already he felt some semblance of control over his mind return now that the Mage’s magic wasn’t directly influencing him. His sword descended on their stunned forms with an ear ringing crack, erasing them from existence and allowing him to focus on his immediate condition.

    The seal on the portal broke and the exit revealed itself. It took all of Diluc’s willpower to put one foot in front of the other and touch it, feeling his body fade away.

    He squinted painfully at the mid-day sun as he found himself standing outside the Domain, now sealed behind him. The tall grass was up to his knees and the trees blotted the horizon.

    It wasn’t safe - he was too close to the Domain; if they went after him he would struggle to defend himself. He felt his consciousness flicker as he forced himself to walk.

    His foot fell upon a rock, loose and waiting for the right push to begin its tumble down the nearby hill, which slipped from its place under his weight. His balance was already affected, and the rock sliding free from under his boot was all it took to send him sprawling, hitting the ground and rolling haphazardly down the hill in a tangle of limbs.

    By the time he came to a stop at the bottom he was only barely aware of the muddied thoughts in his mind, the pain in his body, and the sensation of being tangled in something. Moving was difficult and he was so tired.

    He needed to get up, he needed to move. He…

    Finally his conscious mind couldn’t hold up against the residual magic, and something deep inside snapped.

    Everything went dark.

Chapter Text

Everything was a haze of discomfort. The evening sun cast everything in a red glow and he blinked slowly. He was laying down, and could smell healthy plant life. His head and body were screaming, he was bone weary. He shifted lazily on the ground, immediately snapping his eyes open with an inhale of pain.

Diluc assessed his situation.

It was late evening. He was laying in what appeared to be a thorn bush. He has at least one injury that he could identify. His hair was hopelessly tangled in the thistles.

He kept still for a moment, his thick coat protecting his arms and back from the worst of the jabs, though his legs, face, and wrists were not so lucky; his hair was going to need ages of grooming to clear later.

He took a steeling breath and forced himself to sit up, reaching up to grasp his hair to keep it from ripping out of his head as he pulled away from the worst of the thorn bush. Some of the sharper thorns pierced through his glove as he put his hand on the ground, making him whine.

The process of extracting himself from the bush was tedious and filled with soft complaints and hisses of discomfort, until finally he freed himself and shuffled away from it to a nearby pond. He had to tenderly pluck some thistles and thorns from his butt before he could sit down, but eventually he was able to seat himself on a flat rock by the pond and get his bearings.

He couldn’t remember how he got in the bush, and he couldn’t recall where he got his injuries. He could see what looked like a nasty burn on his arm, straight almost like a line of fire got him. He couldn’t see any because of his clothes, but he could feel bruising all over his body.

Speaking of his clothes; what in the Archon’s names was he wearing ?

Objectively speaking, he was very well dressed, if perhaps a little flashy. The tassels on the unfamiliar coat had picked up numerous hitch-hikers that he would have to remove later. It was black with gold embroidery, matching a white vest and dark undershirt and black pants.

Why was he wearing so much black???

That wasn’t the only mystery he couldn’t sort out. He had removed his gloves to pull some thistles out of the wrists of them, only to discover some scars he didn’t recognize. He also didn’t recognize his blade at all.

The sword was large, ostentatious, and lethal looking. Colored red and black, the cross-like decorations on the claymore made him wonder who made such a thing. He also wondered what happened to his Knight issued Claymore; he liked that sword.

Speaking of Knights, he couldn’t find his badge anywhere on his person. He decided to take some time to go over his pockets, laying everything out neatly on a rock. There was a cloth wrapped trail ration that he quickly devoured, a strange pin, his pocket watch, his Vision, and a note from Elzer about wine shipments crumpled at the bottom.

No badge, marching orders, or anything that told him anything useful; though he wondered why Elzer was writing to him about wine orders. Father handled that.

He wasn’t getting any more answers, he felt, and decided it was probably best to return to the Knight Headquarters and report in. The last thing he could remember was going on a patrol just outside the city in the early morning. Based on the sun he was probably several hours late; they were likely worried.

His desire not to distress his loved ones was enough to make him fight off his weariness and ignore his headache, scooping up his strange sword and beginning the trek back to the city.

-

The path took him some time, since first he had to figure out where in the world he actually was. He knew he was still in Mondstadt territory, and wound up seeking out high ground to get his bearings. Eventually he was able to spot the windmills of his home in the distance, and breathed a faint sigh of relief.

His glider had suffered damage at some point-it was also not the glider he remembered having- so he had to walk, which took even longer. The sun had set hours ago by the time he returned to the city, walking through the gates and shuffling a little awkwardly at the curious looks he was getting.

“Master Diluc, are you alright?” A voice asked; Wagner. Diluc smiled reassuringly to the man, noticing that he looked a little different than he recalled.

“Just took a tumble, I’m quite alright, thank you for your concern!” He replied, earning a lifted eyebrow from the blacksmith.

“...Okay then.” And then he went back to his work in typical Wagner fashion.

This exchange repeated several times as he climbed to the headquarters: someone would call out to him, ask after his welfare, look at him strangely upon the reply, and hesitantly let him go on his way.

Diluc wished he could say that was the weirdest part of this entire situation, but it wasn’t. The city’s core layout was the same, but there were differences that were giving him an uncomfortable sensation he couldn’t put into words.

Things were wrong .

Not in a bad way, but more akin to a deep set feeling of incorrectness. Like walking into a familiar room that had some of the furniture moved.

The city wasn’t exactly how he remembered it being when he left that morning, and the weather was warmer than he felt it should be for late April. He hoped desperately that this was some elaborate prank, because he was genuinely beginning to feel anxious.

He reached the headquarters and walked up to the doors, giving the two guards a smile as he walked right past them without a word, noticing at the last moment their shared look of absolute confusion. He was tempted on going back to ask them questions, but he spotted a familiar face that he felt a much greater desire to talk to.

“Jean!” He called out, relief and friendliness in his tone.

Jean was talking to a man Diluc didn’t recognize, pale haired and over a head shorter than Jean. Upon his call, both of them turned to him. Jean looked confused and surprised, and the man looked mostly bored, though with a slight elevated eyebrow.

“M-Master Diluc?” She asked.

Diluc frowned. “Master?” He asked. “Everyone is calling me that; even you?” He felt a little hurt. How elaborate was this?

The pale haired man looked at him with an eye almost like he was being dissected- wait a second. Diluc hadn’t noticed immediately, but now that he was closer to the pair he could clearly see their clothes and insignias.

The man held the mark of a Captain, though he had no idea who he was. Jean, on the other hand, bore the mark of Master of Knights; a rank he very much didn’t recall her having when he left that morning.

“It’s… It’s your title?” Jean asked haltingly. “Master Diluc, are you okay? You, uh...”

“You appear to have become quite intimate with a local genus of thorn bush.” The blonde man supplied. “You also appear to be somewhat injured.”

Jean’s eyes were filled with worry and she nodded. “Um, yes, that. And you’re acting… strangely.”

“Strangely? I’m me. If anything is strange, it’s everything else.” Diluc argued with a faint frown.

“I recommend we relocate to somewhere away from prying eyes for the time being.” The mystery captain suggested, and Jean nodded in agreement.

“Good idea, come with us?”

“Sure.” Diluc agreed readily and watched as Jean just…

Walked into Grand Master Varka’s office.

“J-Jean?” With a hesitant step he followed behind the pair and watched as Jean walked into the office like it was hers. She began rummaging through a drawer for something with not a single care. “Jean, this is Grand Master Varka’s office!”

“Yes?” She responded, producing a roll of bandage from a small box.

“Why are we in his office? Won’t he object?”

Jean and the blonde shared a look, Jean looking positively alarmed while the man had a glint in his eyes that Diluc couldn’t parse. The man walked slowly to the door and pushed it closed with a faint click.

Diluc looked Jean over more, taking in her outfit and the Vision at her hip-

“Jean?! When did you get a Vision?!” Diluc couldn’t help but exclaim, watching the color wash from Jean’s face entirely.

“It’s fine.” The blonde said, stopping the conversation in its tracks. “Permission was given prior for the use of the office, and we can answer your questions in a moment. Would you first tell us what occurred to put you in such a state?”

Diluc glanced to the man, who spoke to him in a respectful, albeit curious, tone. He hesitated for a moment, his questions burning, but decided to do as he was asked; since Jean hadn’t kicked him out yet, it was probably okay.

“I went on patrol this morning like normal.” Diluc began, removing his jacket at Jean’s silent request, allowing her to gingerly roll his sleeve up to get to the burn. “I was around Springvale, and that’s the last thing I can remember clearly. Next thing I know, I’m waking up in a thorn bush in the middle of nowhere.”

“You don’t know how you acquired your injuries?” The man asked.

“No. I suppose some of them came from whatever put me in that bush, but that’s just guessing.” Diluc answered, looking to Jean as she used a pair of forceps with a cotton ball gripped in them to clean the burn with disinfectant. “No idea where the burn came from, though.”

“I see… You said people have been addressing you oddly. Has anything else struck you as peculiar?” The man continued to press with questions, and Jean’s worried expression was making him far more anxious than he already was.

“Well, my clothes for one. I don’t recognize them at all. My sword, too.” He began to list. “I have some scars I didn’t have before, and everyone is calling me ‘Master’ Diluc. Not to mention that the city looks like it’s been altered somehow; things aren’t where they were.”

It began to occur to Diluc that all of these things had a common denominator.

…That wasn’t possible, was it?

Diluc wanted answers, and he rounded on the blonde man first. “What’s going on? Who are you? Why are we allowed in Grand Master Varka’s Office?” He then looked to Jean. “When did you get Promoted? And your Vision?”

Jean stood with the bandage in her hand, looking positively mortified. The strange man took this in stride; he almost looked intrigued.

“I am Albedo, Chief Alchemist and Captain of the Investigation team.” Albedo introduced himself. “But I suspect that statement is inconsistent with your preconceptions, correct?”

“That’s an understatement. Are you going to answer my other questions?” Diluc was trying to keep patience, but it was rapidly waning.

“I suspect any answer I supply will be insufficient to you. I ask you bear with me just a few moments more. Can you tell me the date?” Albedo asked in that same calm tone.

“April 25th.” Diluc answered with an annoyed sigh.

“And the year?”

“...” Diluc hesitated before answering, and the number he supplied made Jean gasp softly and Albedo cup his chin in his fingers in thought.

“Interesting.” The alchemist mumbled.

“Jean, what in the world is going on?! ” Diluc finally snapped, his voice raising in irritation.

Immediately the door swung open, making the trio turn to look at the intruder.

“I heard yelling, is everything okay?” Kaeya asked, his eyes quickly assessing the room.

Seeing his brother filled Diluc with immediate comfort; if anyone could explain what was going on, it would be him.

“Kaeya.” He said with genuine relief, making the man in question stop short and stare at him like he’d grown a third head. “… Not you too, Kaeya.” He almost whined, which only seemed to throw the man even harder.

Kaeya looked to Jean and Albedo in a silent question, and Diluc took the second to appraise his sibling. What the actual hell was he wearing? What happened to those turtlenecks he so adored? Kaeya was always freezing; he’d be cold on the sun! Right now he was showing enough chest to give every girl in Mondstadt the flutters; strangely bold for the normally more reserved man.

He also noticed the rank.

His rank.

Alarm rushed through him and he had to fight himself for composure. Kaeya would help him sort this out, it was fine.

It’d be fine.

“Care to fill me in?” Kaeya asked, adjusting the order of the documents in his hands.

“Based on the information provided by Master Diluc, as well as his behaviors and current state, my hypothesis is that he is suffering from some form of retrograde amnesia.” Albedo said, making Diluc sputter.

“What?!”

To the alchemist’s credit, he seemed unbothered by the ire directed at him and continued, telling Kaeya the same date Diluc had supplied earlier.

At the date Kaeya’s brows narrowed, squinting hard at the floor in the way he did when his mind was at work; that was the expression Kaeya wore when things were serious.

“Kae?” Diluc asked, his voice small. Kaeya gave a bodily jolt, snapping his head up to look to him. “Kae, what’s happening? This is some bad joke, right? Please tell me this is some bad joke?”

Kaeya stared him down, seeming downright torn . Soon he inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly, simply holding the documents out to him.

“Read the date in the upper right of this report.” He instructed.

Diluc obeyed, though not before giving his brother a concerned look. He skimmed the writing in reflex; a patrol report by an ‘Outrider Amber’. The date was-

“What?” He asked, his voice a whisper as he felt the floor drop out from under him. “This… this can’t be right?” He looked up to Kaeya almost desperately. “This is a joke, right? This is-”

“The truth.” Kaeya said firmly.

“You’re telling me I’ve forgotten the last four years of my life?! ”

Chapter Text

Diluc needed some time to process the absolute bombshell that he had just been presented with, sinking into a chair and holding his face in his hands. He didn’t say anything as Jean silently resumed treating the injuries he’d sustained, bandaging the burn and cleaning the cuts and scrapes on his wrists, eventually forcing him to sit up so she could clean his face.

Albedo and Kaeya stood aside in silence, though he felt he could almost hear the gears turning in the alchemist’s head. Finally Jean finished her work and stood, giving him some breathing room as she returned the unused supplies back into the kit. “I’ll go get us a pot of tea. Albedo, Kaeya, can you sit with him for a bit?”

“Of course.” Albedo replied immediately, with a far more hesitant nod from Kaeya. Jean said her thanks and left the room, softly closing the door behind her and leaving them alone.

Diluc felt the air was strange, and cast concerned glances to his brother. He tried to occupy himself by pulling his hair to his shoulder, slowly attempting to pick out the thistles. He knew he’d only be able to reach some of them, though, and looked once more at Kaeya.

“Kae, can you help me?” He asked, watching his sibling go very still.

The delay in a response was worrying, but Albedo spoke up first.

“He will be unable to clear his hair of them on his own.” He said. “It should be addressed before they become any more lodged inside.”

Kaeya sighed softly and nodded, walking over to a cabinet in the corner. He withdrew a brush and a comb from within and silently walked over.

Diluc knew his brother well enough to know he was distressed. He was probably worried terribly, and he felt a small warmth at the unspoken caring.

He let himself relax as he felt Kaeya begin the process of fixing his hair, combing out tangles and removing thistles from the curls as he slowly worked his way up. He’d only made it about a quarter of the way when Jean returned with a tea tray. Kaeya paused his work for a moment to look to her, and Diluc turned his head slightly to follow his gaze.

She looked confused and concerned, but an action he couldn’t see from Kaeya made her nod and she walked over, gently setting the tray down. “So I’ve given it some thought,” She began, pouring four cups, passing the first to Diluc. “and I think it’s best if we take you to the church.”

“I feel fine, aside from the memory thing.” Diluc insisted, very much not wanting to go to the church.

“The ‘memory thing’ is why you should go to the church. What if you hit your head? We have no idea what happened to you.” Jean argued, and Diluc’s bull headed personality kicked in.

“I said I feel fine! My headache’s eased up and if I hit my head, I’m pretty sure I’d know by now.” He cast his eyes up towards Kaeya briefly, who was still slowly working on removing all of the unwelcome guests from his hair. “And anyway, I don’t want to cause a fuss.”

Jean exhaled in worried exasperation, opening her mouth to retort. Albedo’s calm voice silenced her.

“I believe that taking him directly to the church may be unwise.” He said. “Though that is not to say we should avoid seeking out their aid.”

Jean frowned to him, a silent inquiry.

“It would be an issue if the people found out the state of their Uncrowned King, do you not agree? Based on what we’ve been told, he has already aroused much concern from the people, it’s only a matter of time before rumors begin to flow.” Albedo continued to explain. “Taking him to the church will only startle the people, drawing even more attention to what is a very delicate condition.”

Jean frowned softly, and looked to Diluc and Kaeya. Diluc looked up slightly to his brother, a quiet plea for support.

Kaeya sighed deeply. “I agree with Albedo.” He said slowly. “He could be...taken advantage of in this state.”

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

“It’s entirely possible the condition will alleviate itself in a day or two of rest and familiar environments.” Albedo continued. “And we can be assured that Barbara will act with discretion if you request her aid, can we not?”

“… Yes, I can trust her to keep this quiet...” Jean gave in, looking to Diluc with worry. “Will that be okay?”

Diluc huffed softly and knew he would have to compromise. “Fine.” He said, wincing softly as Kaeya struggled with a particularly bad part of hair. “I mostly don’t want to raise a lot of alarm, so that’s fine. I would like to see Father, too.”

The hands in Diluc’s hair stilled as Jean’s expression becoming harrowingly unreadable. Albedo’s passive expression revealed nothing.

“I’ll take him home and...” Kaeya spoke softly, his hands resuming their work. “I’ll handle this.”

Cryptic, but it was Kaeya, so Diluc didn’t try to read much else into the statement; the shift in the energy of the room was far more concerning to him.

“Very well… I’ll send word to Barbara to visit the Winery early in the morning.” Jean said, crossing her arms to hold her elbows.

“Would you consent to providing me with a blood sample before you depart?” Albedo asked, making the three others look at him with expressions ranging from alarm to annoyance. “If his condition is not due to cranial trauma, it’s possible it’s a toxin or some sort; a blood sample will permit me to rule the possibility out.”

Oh. That was reasonable. He didn’t like the prospect of it, but… it made sense.

“Only if you want to, Diluc.” Jean assured him. With a sigh, Diluc decided it was probably for the best.

“Fine, I guess.” He agreed. With a soft nod Albedo left the room, likely to fetch the needed materials.

“For the time being-” Kaeya began. “-it’s best if you minimize conversation with anyone unaware of your condition. It wouldn’t be hard for someone to figure out something is different.”

“Surely four years hasn’t made that big of a difference?”

“…Give the people of Mond more credit.” Kaeya said. “Anyway, you should also avoid looking at any documents you don’t immediately recognize; getting information out of context might cause extra confusion.”

An odd request, but if Kaeya said so, it had good reason. He nodded softly as to not interfere with his progress on his hair, which was coming along well. Kaeya had always been skilled with battling his curls, able to handle snarls and tangles with exceptional ease without causing much discomfort.

“We’ll go to the Dawn Winery once we’re done here, and you should rest there until we figure out our next move.” Kaeya continued.

“Is that where Father is?” Diluc asked. “Isn’t the manor closer?”

“… The best place to go is the Winery.” Kaeya answered. “We’ll make sure everyone who needs to know is informed...”

Diluc huffed faintly but accepted the half-answer, leaning back in the chair and feeling the hairbrush finally run through his hair without snagging, the last of the thistles finally having been removed.

“There. Try to avoid any thorn bushes going forward, okay?” Kaeya said as he moved swiftly away from his side, occupying himself across the room by the trash bin to clean out the brush and discard the alarmingly large pile of thistles.

“I promise it’s not a habit I want to make.” Diluc chuckled weakly, accepting his coat from Jean and resting it on his lap.

Albedo returned shortly afterwards and, thankfully, made the process of drawing blood relatively painless. Sample procured, the alchemist vanished without so much as a ‘goodbye’.

“What a strange man.” Diluc couldn’t help but say softly.

“He’s a genius.” Kaeya replied. “I have no doubt that, if there is anything to find, he’ll find it. Odds are he’ll know before the morning.”

“I’ll ask him to leave me a report; I’ll bring it with me in the morning.” Jean said, getting a nod from Kaeya.

He then sighed softly and turned to Diluc. “Ready to go, then?”

“Sure.” Diluc stood, rubbing the draw site slightly in discomfort before pulling his jacket on. It felt equal parts strange and familiar; he must wear it a lot.

They left the headquarters, Jean tailing behind them far enough to give the guards strict orders to retain silence. Kaeya led them down the side paths towards the auxiliary gate, skirting around the bulk of the population in the city that wandered even this late at night.

Kaeya gave simple instructions to the side and main gate guards to keep quiet, walking with Diluc as they finally crossed the bridge, making their way towards the Dawn Winery. They were basically alone now, so he figured they could spend the time by talking.

“So, Cavalry Captain?” Diluc asked, watching Kaeya’s eye dart to look at him briefly before returning to the road. “How did you wind up getting my rank?”

“It’s a long story.” Kaeya replied. “It wasn’t taken from you, so don’t worry about that.”

“I wasn’t worried, mostly just confused.” Diluc admitted, fiddling with his sleeve as he walked. “Imagine my confusion when I saw Jean the first time! Ah, what’s going on with her?”

“She’s the Acting Grand Master while Grand Master Varka is on expedition.” Kaeya said simply.

“Oh, so that’s why we used his office.” Diluc nodded. “What about me? What’s my rank? I couldn’t find my badge anywhere.”

Kaeya was silent.

“Kae?”

“You should try to remember things for yourself, I think.” Kaeya replied finally, making Diluc frown.

“What do you mean by that?”

“I meant what I said.” Kaeya’s tone was hard and it sent a jolt of something unpleasant through Diluc’s chest. “Whats the point in telling you everything if the goal is to try to get you to remember on your own?”

“You don’t think knowing some of these things might trigger something?” Diluc argued, annoyed.

“I’m no expert. We’ll talk about it in the morning after you’re checked on.” Kaeya’s tone made it clear that the discussion was over, and Diluc was floored by how easily he found himself losing to Kaeya.

What happened to the passive, kind, and soft spoken Kaeya he knew? Sure, he could see his brother there, easily. The kindness in how careful he was with his hair, the genuine worry in his eye. But at the same time there was a distance there, like he was treading on fragile glass.

What had Kaeya acting like this?

Diluc’s head began to hurt more, and he decided he didn’t have the energy to fight with him right then. With a reluctant sigh, he allowed the subject to drop and they walked silently.

The trip was uneventful, and it was Kaeya’s voice that pulled him out of his own swirling thoughts as the edges of the vineyard came into view.

“When we arrive, give the instruction that you are not to be bothered except for meals,” He said. “and to allow in Grand Master Jean, Deaconess Barbara, or Captain Albedo.”

“We’re hiding this from the staff, too?” Diluc asked, noting that Albedo was strangely on that list. “Surely we could trust Adelinde?”

“Her and Elzer, absolutely, but the rest of the staff are horrible gossips, and the last thing we need is even more rumors spreading.” Kaeya said. “It’s easier to just avoid everyone for now. Until we get a better idea on the shape you’re in.”

Diluc sighed and nodded, accepting his brother’s words.

“Fine. For now. I’m telling Father, though.”

“… I won’t stop you.” Kaeya said softly, pushing on ahead and mounting the hill.

Diluc felt some of his stress ease from his shoulders as he saw the winery. It looked almost exactly the same, even down to the flowers in front of the door. The familiarity did wonders for his nerves, smiling in silent relief.

“Try not to smile so much when around others.” Kaeya instructed simply, which was an absolutely baffling request.

“What?” He asked, stopping short. “Are you implying that smiling is going to be suspicious or something?”

“Or something.” Kaeya replied cryptically. “Go on, then.”

Diluc bristled, and he was getting to the point where he was about to put his foot up his brother’s butt. “Fine.” He grumbled, his mood souring.

They were greeted by a group of staff, all bowing respectfully as the brothers walked inside.

“Welcome home, Master Diluc.” They said. Diluc felt uncomfortable. This was how they tended to treat Father. How strange.

“Thank you. I...” He paused, glancing to Kaeya, then back to the staff. “Aside from meals, I’m not to be bothered. Knights of Favonius should come by in the morning, allow them inside.”

Kaeya closed his eye and nodded softly as the staff sang a chorus of acknowledgments, dispersing shortly after. He didn’t move until the staff had left the room, heading to the stairs and climbing them, pausing only to ensure Diluc was following.

Kaeya led them into what Diluc could only assume was his own bedroom. What struck him as odd was…

“This is Father’s room.” Diluc said as they stood in the master suite of the winery, filled with what was clearly his own belongings. He recognized the old quilt that he was fond of on his bed, books he’d read many times growing up upon his shelves, as well as his old desk and favorite chair against the wall. Other things were different, but he could easily tell that this room was his.

“It’s yours.” Kaeya replied. “Get some sleep, I’ll be back in the morning with the others. We’ll see if some rest might help you.”

“You aren’t staying?” Diluc felt disappointment; the idea of being alone while he was like this was… He didn’t like it. All his ire vanished at the prospect of being alone and he actually reached out to grip his brother’s arm. “Why?”

Kaeya hesitated. “I haven’t slept here in a while.” He said haltingly.

“That doesn’t matter!” Diluc insisted, his grip tightening on reflex as he felt Kaeya shift as though trying to free himself. “I… Don’t want to be alone right now.” He confessed. “Kaeya, do you have any idea how scary this is?”

That got a response. Kaeya’s expression softened for an instant, a flash of what almost looked like guilt flickering across his face before he exhaled deeply.

“If you insist.” Kaeya acquiesced.

Chapter Text

Diluc wasn’t sure how he expected to feel the next morning, but ‘completely the same’ was not what he was hoping for. He had woken groggily, body aching as he shuffled about the familiarly unfamiliar room. He found what he needed easily, not by nature of knowing where things were, but by knowing where he would put things if this was his room.

Despite Kaeya’s warning, Diluc couldn’t help but snoop, looking at book spines and at documents piled on his desk. Most of the titles were familiar to him, though the papers sitting on his desk were written in a script he couldn’t parse. Attempting to mimic the letters proved that it was, in fact, his handwriting. Since when did he write in code? It wasn’t any language he knew of…

Deciding to quit while he was ahead, Diluc began the process of grooming his tremendous bed head, sitting in the plush stool in front of his vanity. His mane was far larger and fluffier than he recalled it ever being, and so what he remembered taking only a few minutes was now quite the ordeal.

He squinted irritably at his own reflection as he ran the brush through the curling strands, each stroke slowly working out the knots and snarls that had made their home in his curls.

Once he, finally, couldn’t find any more knots or tangles, he gently set his brush on the surface of the vanity. He then looked at the mirror, leaning forward to give himself a proper inspection.

The first thing he noticed were the dark bags under his eyes. He leaned forward even more and ran his fingers along the underside of his eyelid, confirming that they weren’t just bruised. Then he moved to the faint creases on his face; frown lines. He found his expression dropping naturally into an almost scowl, which was concerning in itself.

He’d heard of the word ‘dysphoria’ before, and while he knew it likely didn’t apply to what he was experiencing, it was the only word he could think of to place what he was feeling. He stood suddenly, almost knocking the stool to the floor as he moved quickly from the mirror. It taunted him as he tried to dress, catching reflections of a man that wasn’t him in the glass.

Eventually he grew so tired of it that he ripped the blanket from his bed and covered the mirror, allowing him to dress in peace.

His chest ached with anxiety and confusion as he finally descended the stairs to the first floor of the winery, passing the familiar owl statue as it fed him to the dining area. He then stopped short, his gaze drawn to an out of place flash of color that he had missed the previous night. No longer distracted by fatigue and his brother, Diluc was able to spot what was simultaneously the most elegant and hideous vase he’d ever seen.

“When did we get this?” Diluc muttered to himself, running his fingers along the rim.

“It’s just a vase.” Kaeya said, making the Tycoon jolt in surprise.

“Kaeya- You scared me.” Diluc turned to face his brother, who had been sitting at the dining table with a simple spread of eggs and toast sitting on the plate in front of him.

“Apologies, I wasn’t trying to.” Kaeya replied simply, sipping at his coffee. “I’m assuming you don’t recall anything?”

“Nothing new, no.” Diluc answered softly, padding over to the chair beside the Captain and sinking into it, ignorant to how Kaeya tensed up slightly at the proximity.

“I… see.” Kaeya said, his tone a wisp as Diluc reached to snag an apple from the fruit bowl on the table. “Jean and Barbara should be here in the next hour or so.”

Diluc bit into the apple with a loud crunch, nodding through a full mouth in reply.

-

Just as Kaeya had anticipated, it was about an hour later that the heavy knocker at the main doors echoed across the winery. Diluc had demolished two plates of egg and sausage in that time, and waved off the servant who went to answer the door.

“Ah! I’ll get it!” Diluc called out as he jumped to his feet, gently herding away a very confused maid. Kaeya offered the baffled woman a smile and watched as she nervously wandered off.

The large double doors opened without so much as a creak, revealing three visitors. Jean and Barbara stood abreast of one another with Albedo standing slightly behind them, his focus mostly on one of the flowers in the window box.

Diluc’s focus landed on Barbara immediately, his mouth engaging before his brain did.

“Barbara, you got big .”

The only sound was the audible slap of Kaeya’s hand hitting his forehead.

-

Damage control done, Barbara was only slightly blushing by the time they had all made their way to Diluc’s study, a secure and soundproofed room where they could talk in safety.

“So you remember nothing else, I take it?” Jean asked, trying not to sound exasperated as she leaned on the windowsill. Albedo had perched himself on a low shelf against the wall, Kaeya having found a place beside him. Barbara stood closest to the amnesiac, mostly due to the necessity of it as she began preparing for her task.

“Nothing new, at least.” Diluc replied, passing Barbara one more apologetic look.

“Well, hopefully Barbara can figure something out.” Jean sighed softly.

“Albedo, you took a blood sample yesterday. What can you tell us?” Kaeya asked.

“Ah, the toxicology screen came up clear of any unusual substances. The only thing worth mentioning is a noteworthy amount of what seems to be a sedative.” Albedo explained.

Diluc blinked and scanned the room. Barbara was frowning sadly, Jean looked worried, and Diluc couldn’t even begin to guess what Kaeya may have been thinking as the man’s face was an expressionless mask.

“Should we be worried…?” Diluc asked softly, unsure. Albedo shook his head.

“Nothing to be concerned about. The quantities were well within safe ranges; hardly enough to make someone more than perhaps slightly drowsy.” He’d gently clasp his chin in his fingers. “If I had to guess, I would presume it was being used as a non-prescription form of-”

“Albedo.” Kaeya’s voice, soft but firm, interrupted the alchemist. The pair had an unspoken conversation through expressions and the shorter man sighed in surrender.

“Apologies, it is nothing to worry about, we should focus on what we don’t know for now.” Albedo finally said, gesturing to Barbara to do her thing. “When you’re both ready.”

Diluc frowned but decided to let it go and simply ask Kaeya later. Barbara rest her hand on his shoulder to get his attention and he snapped his head to look at her.

“This may feel a little strange, stay still for me?” She asked.

Diluc gave a faint nod and looked forward, closing his eyes and allowing the Deaconess to do what she needed to.

He could feel the rush of energy around him, the gentle prodding of hydro magic as it inspected him carefully. It moved over him with what he could imagine as a keen eye, seeking any hint that could lead them to understand what happened.

Eventually the sensation faded and Barbara sighed. He opened his eyes in time to see her frown and shake her head.

“Aside from the small injuries from his fall, nothing.” She reported. “From what I can tell, he never hit his head.”

“So the amnesia is not trauma related, nor is it a result of any detectable chemical.” Albedo mused. “That narrows down the causes by a lot.”

“He woke up outside a domain.” Jean offered. “Perhaps it’s the result of something that happened within?”

“It’s not out of the question, it appears to be the only likely explanation.” Albedo nodded his assent. “We will have to try to find the domain in question and investigate.”

“Excuse me-”

“Is it possible he did suffer a head injury and we just can’t detect it?” Kaeya asked, earning a pout from the Deaconess.

“I would have spotted it if he did.” She said.

“Excuse me.”

Kaeya turned to Albedo. “We should wait to see if he remembers anything else on his own before you go experimenting.” He warned.

“I would not act without first considering potential adverse effects, please don’t worry.” Albedo Assured.

“Hey-”

“It’s best he tries to remember on his own, right?” Kaeya then asked.

“It’s hard to say. Without knowing the nature of what caused it, it’s possible-”

“Stop talking about me like I’m not sitting right here!”

Diluc’s irritated shout echoed across the study, shattering every conversation that had been occurring into pieces. The amnesiac panted as his Vision flickered with his temper, prompting Kaeya to take a half step back in response.

“I’m not some invalid who can’t participate in this conversation, you know!” Diluc continued, his tone bitter with irritation and a not-insignificant feeling of helplessness. “Don’t I get a say in any of this?”

“You’re right. I’m sorry, Sir.” Jean said, immediately earning a wordless sideways glance from the cavalry captain.

Somewhat soothed, Diluc allowed his hackles to lower some and simply pouted. “I don’t want to be left in the dark.” He said. “There’s so many wonderful things I’ve forgotten, and you’re just going to sit around and wait for me to remember on my own?”

“Wonderful things?” Albedo asked faintly.

“Yeah! Kaeya and Jean’s promotions for one! Kaeya and Jean getting their Visions! All the birthdays I’ve forgotten, too!” Diluc declared, smiling in excitement at the prospects.

Instantly a heavy aura settled, the only pair of eyes remaining fixed on him being the alchemist’s. Diluc was no fool; he could read the energy of the room and knew something was wrong.

“...Right?” He asked, his voice a small chirp, turning his head to his brother. “Kaeya…?” Fear began to settle on his chest and he looked to the one person he knew could offer him security. Kaeya’s one eye hesitated but turned to meet his pleading gaze. “Kaeya, what…?” His voice trailed off, not sure what he even wanted to ask.

Silence passed between the two and Kaeya exhaled slowly. “I apologize, all of you, but would you go?” He asked. “I will speak with Master Diluc; would you be able to look for leads in the meantime?”

“Of course, Kaeya.” Jean said softly, Barbara and Albedo already heading for the door. “We’ll do everything we can. We’ll reconvene at headquarters later, okay?”

“Okay. Thank you.” Kaeya nodded softly. Jean offered the pair a reassuring smile before turning to go, closing the door behind her with a cautious click.

The two men were alone in the room, Diluc having sank fully into his study chair while Kaeya had not moved from his spot. Silence was once again between them, a heavy shroud that neither wanted to lift.

“Kae…?” A small whisper of a voice, Diluc took the risk.

Kaeya’s brow furrowed. “Your memories… Aren’t pretty, Diluc.” He warned, his voice grave.

Diluc felt a claw grasp at his throat, a heavy weight in his chest that made the room spin. He breathed through it and shook his head. “I… want to know.” He decided.

Kaeya sighed deeply. “I’ll tell you a couple things, but not too much so soon, okay?” He finally said.

“Why?” Diluc immediately argued. “They’re my memories!”

“Don’t be a child, Diluc.” Kaeya immediately chastised, which only served to make the brother bristle in annoyance. “We don’t know what happened to you, it’s entirely possible that telling you things will make it so that you accidentally develop false memories due to inaccurate retelling.”

“You really think I’d do that?” Diluc argued.

“Not intentionally, but it’s easier to happen than you think.” Kaeya said with an air of confidence, like a learned scholar in a familiar subject.

Diluc was not satisfied, but could tell that Kaeya was unlikely to budge. With a deep frown of annoyance Diluc turned his head and spat a spark of fire to soothe his own irritability.

Kaeya actually jumped at the action, surprise and astonishment on his face as plain as day.

“...What?” Diluc asked, suddenly confused.

Kaeya’s lip twitched and immediately his hand went to cover his face. Diluc knew his brother well enough to know he was hiding a grin. “I… I apologize but I haven’t seen you do that in years.”

“Do what?”

“Did you… Did you not even realize you did that?”

The amnesiac thought for a second. “What, spit fire?”

“Yes; you stopped doing that a while back.” Kaeya’s voice was laced with amusement.

“Huh… Wonder why.”

“I couldn’t say.” Kaeya shrugged.

“A-ah! Don’t change the subject!” Diluc immediately remembered his original goal and slapped the table. Despite his attempts to look forceful, Kaeya only appeared to grow more amused.

“As I said, I’ll tell you a little bit; but we shouldn’t taint your recollection with any prior biases.” Kaeya argued gently, and Diluc could only grunt in unspoken surrender. He had a point…

He still felt entitled to them; they were his memories! Why did Kaeya get to make the call!

…

Why did Kaeya get to make that call? Why was Kaeya in charge of everything?

Why hadn’t they contacted his father? Surely he was the authority in these kinds of situations, and he knew Kaeya wouldn’t hesitate to turn to their father for help...

A lance of white hot dread shot through Diluc’s young heart at that moment. Previous interactions came to mind, all of which rang differently with a newfound context that made him feel sick.

“K...” A crack of a noise, he swallowed and forced himself to talk. “Kaeya.”

“Yes?” Kaeya’s amusement dropped in an instant, his tone showing a hint of concern.

“… Where is Father?”

Chapter Text

The air in the room turned into a heavy miasma, and it became hard to breathe as a sudden weight threatened to drag Diluc into the ground. He looked up at his brother, not caring how helpless his expression looked, as he waited for the answer he didn’t want to hear.

Kaeya shuffled in place and looked away, staring out the window as his jaw set.

“Kae...” Diluc knew his brother’s hesitation meant only one thing. “Kae, where is…”

“Come with me, I’ll… Take you to him.” Kaeya’s voice was apprehensive, like he was uncertain of his decision.

Diluc allowed himself a small glimmer of hope, as tentative as it was, and stood eagerly. Kaeya turned and stepped out of the study, his brother at his heels as he descended the stairs.

One of the serving staff-someone Diluc didn’t recognize but who smiled at him with warm familiarity- passed Kaeya a bag, earning a soft thanks from the Captain. They passed Diluc one as well, with the confidence of routine, and the amnesiac could only accept it with a word of gratitude of his own.

Only out of sight of the winery did he dare look at the contents as he tried to temporarily dispel his anxiety. He found a small selection of documents, coinage, maps, and other miscellany with utility and purpose. Buried in the bottom he had also found a small coin-like object with a hole in the center, and he stared at it trying to puzzle why it looked so familiar.

He allowed the small object to dominate his focus to cool the nausea growing in his belly, and looked to his brother. “Kae, do you recognize this?” He’d ask, holding it out.

Kaeya glanced over curiously, plucking the ‘coin’ from his palm and turning it in his fingers. “I’ve never seen this before, but if I had to guess, it looks almost like a cipher coin. Useless as is, though.” Kaeya hummed softly and passed it back. “Where did you find it?”

“In my bag.”

Kaeya grunted a small acknowledgment and nodded. “It could be yours, or you might have lifted it from someone.”

“Why would I do that?”

“You had your reasons. Anyway, watch your step.” Kaeya had led them along the path, eventually branching away from the road and into a thick brush. A thin path had been worn, as though it was far less tread than the one they were previously upon.

Diluc stopped short. He knew this place.

“Kae… This is….” His voice was small, as fear and denial latched once more upon his chest as he desperately prayed he was wrong.

“I know. Come on.” Kaeya’s tone was gentle, but firm.

With hesitant steps Diluc approached, reaching out on reflex to grip Kaeya’s arm tightly. He felt his brother tense up at his touch, but relax a few moments later.

It wasn’t much farther, and Diluc couldn’t help but screw his eyes shut and rely on Kaeya to guide him safely, unwilling to look at their destination as they approached. Their pace slowed, until eventually they came to a stop. He felt a breeze on his face, and the familiar sound of water on rock a distance away.

“Perhaps it would have been gentler to simply tell you myself, but...” Kaeya’s soft voice made Diluc flinch. “But I thought, perhaps, simply seeing for yourself...”

This was cruel. Diluc understood but it was cruel. He kept his eyes screwed shut, desperately praying to hear his Father’s voice, steadfastly refusing to look until he felt he had no other choice. He gripped Kaeya’s arm tightly, and it was only the faint hiss of pain from the other that made Diluc realize he was hurting him.

He forced himself to loosen his grip and let go of the lifeline he had been clinging to. He heard the shuffling of fabric as Kaeya took a couple slow steps away, giving Diluc space.

Diluc’s breath slowly began to come out in faint heaves, anxiety welling up as he felt like he was walking on thin glass. He wished to throw up, the churning emotion in his stomach making him feel as though he would lose his balance.

Slowly he opened his eyes, and his gaze landed on a well-kept gravestone. He knew this one well, visiting every month or so with his Father and Brother. His mother’s name was engraved into the stone.

The second headstone beside it was what made the glass he stood upon shatter, and Diluc felt himself plunge into the dark depths below.

Carved into stone was his father’s name, and a painfully familiar date that he only just managed to make out before his vision swam with tears. Pain rocketed up his legs as he collapsed, his legs refusing to work as his body revolted. The urge to vomit returned in force as his lungs burned fire between gasping breaths, and he slapped a gloved hand over his mouth in an attempt to suppress it.

His thoughts were a chaotic cacophony of grief and lucidity, latching onto only the worst parts of the situation and turning all else into painful static.

Crepus had died on Diluc’s 18^th Birthday.

Crepus had died about a week after Diluc’s memories stopped.

Crepus was Dead.

Father was dead.

Diluc was going to be in charge of his father’s escort that day- had he failed?

His body shook as the urge to throw up faded into wracking sobs as he felt himself lose the will to hold himself up, digging the fingers of his free hand deeply into the dirt. In what he would later describe as a childish display, Diluc grieved his father, screaming to the sky and frightening birds from their nests as his anguish made itself known.

He quickly felt his voice grow hoarse, unable to stop his grief to pay it any mind, fist pounding the ground as he lost the battle between wit and emotion. His body was numb, his thoughts chaos, and his sense of his environment lost as his echoing wail carried on the wind.

He did not hear Kaeya’s approach, and only barely felt a hesitant hand rest on his shoulder. Snapping briefly back to reality, Diluc turned to his side, seeing the blurry outline of his brother, his expression unreadable.

Dignity be damned, Diluc acted on impulse and latched onto his sibling, wrapping his arms tightly around the other’s shoulders and letting the last of his walls come down. Open, vulnerable, and wounded, Diluc trusted Kaeya to support him in that moment and buried himself into his chest as though he would hide him from the harsh reality of the world.

Slowly, Kaeya’s hands reached around to hug Diluc back, pulling him close and supporting his weight as the elder brother came apart in his arms. Soft soothing circles were rubbed into his back, Kaeya shifting to sit more comfortably on the ground as Diluc worked through his grief, resting his cheek on the fiery mane of his brother’s hair.

They sat for a while, the sun moving in the sky and the warmth of the day inching into their bones. Slowly Diluc’s sobs and cries had turned into sniffles and hiccups, and it was entirely possible he’d dozed off for a couple minutes.

Eventually, though, Diluc made himself rise and face the world, wiping at his face with his sleeve. A beat later he remembered that he had a handkerchief and made use of it.

His voice was hoarse from crying, but still Diluc tried to ask: “How did it happen?”

Kaeya shook his head softly. “Another time, let’s go about this slowly, shall we?”

For a beat Diluc wanted to be irritated, but he knew Kaeya was right. He felt emotionally battered after that one bombshell; if Kaeya was advising they wait, it was likely for the best. With reluctance Diluc nodded, “I trust you.” he said.

Kaeya’s expression shifted a minuscule amount, but Diluc was too exhausted to be able to parse what it may have been.

“Do you… know of any nice memories?” Diluc’s throat hurt, but he wanted to hear something comforting after such a harrowing truth. Kaeya remained still, his grip on his brother loosening slightly.

“I’m...afraid I don’t know of many.” He confessed. “You were gone for three years; I have no idea what you were doing during that time.”

Confusion pushed some of the hurt away, and Diluc latched onto the small distraction. “Why would I leave you behind like that…?”

“I was quite busy with the Knights at the time.” Kaeya said. “I’m sure you had your reasons.”

Diluc sighed, his eyes landing on his brother’s hip. “Can you tell me how you got your Vision?” He asked.

“I would very much rather not.” Kaeya said, his tone with an edge that told Diluc he wouldn’t budge.

Diluc frowned and tried something else. “Well, how did you reach Cavalry Captain?”

“Once again, it is best we do not discuss that subject.” That tone again, and Diluc felt himself bristle; his patience running thin.

“You promised to tell me things!” He argued almost petulantly. “Why are you hiding everything?” He already felt emotionally tattered and ran across the coals, why was Kaeya being so resistant?

Kaeya had been staring out in the distance for most of the discussion, and only finally turned to meet his brother’s gaze. “Because there...isn’t much I know that is happy. I don’t want to make you feel any worse right now.”

That fact was enough to douse the flickering flames of irritation in the amnesiac, filling him again with a faint sting of dread.

“Surely it’s… It’s not all so miserable?” He’d ask, his voice almost a squeak.

“Likely not, however I’m not privy to much.”

“Why aren’t you?”

“It’s not important.”

“Yes, it is , Kaeya!” Diluc stood, any impact it would have had lost to the undignified struggle he had escaping from Kaeya’s long limbs . “Please, please tell me something! ”

Kaeya’s eye closed and he glanced away, his finger crooking at his chin in thought. After a few moments he looked back to his brother.

“Sit down, please, I have a couple things I can tell you.” He said, his voice soft. “It may not be what you wish to hear right now, but it’s something.”

Diluc huffed and made himself sit back down, crossing his legs and sitting within arms reach, watching Kaeya expectantly.

The Captain sighed softly. “I can tell you about Jean?” He offered. “You asked about her promotion.”

Diluc perked up slightly, interested in his friend. He nodded softly and allowed Kaeya to continue.

“Jean’s promotion to Master of Knights happened about a year after you left Mondstadt. There was a traitor amongst the order of the Knights: Inspector Eroch. She led the charge in his exposure, and even earned her Vision in the fight.” Kaeya explained, audible pride in his voice. Questions popped into Diluc’s head, but he kept quiet. “She earned the love and respect of the people of Mondstadt after that, and is easily the hardest worker of the entire order.”

“Which is why she was using Grand Master Varka’s office?” Diluc asked, his partial question understood.

“Yes, as I mentioned before, Varka went on an expedition and took a large number of the Knights with him. He left Jean in charge as the Acting Grand Master. If I may be so bold, though, I do feel like many are now simply waiting for Grand Master Varka to announce his retirement so she can take the position officially.” Kaeya grinned, a glint in his eye that sang of more than he was saying. Diluc decided not to ask.

“Is that how you were also promoted?” He asked instead.

“It was… a factor.” Kaeya half-answered.

“Hm… what else will you tell me? What about that blonde man?”

“Ah, Albedo?” Kaeya’s tone took on an affectionate lilt. “An absolutely brilliant mind, always calm and level headed, and has this aura that has nearly everyone like him without him having to try. He’s already quite beloved.”

Diluc couldn’t hide a teasing smirk, the faint mirth a balm on his hurting heart. “You seem fond of him yourself.~” He felt a little better being able to tease his brother.

Kaeya’s breath hitched slightly and he glanced away. “Can I be blamed? I’m certainly not alone.” He defended.

“I’m sure.” Diluc smiled more openly. “He said he was part of the Investigation unit?”

“Head of it, yes. And also the Chief Alchemist.” Kaeya let the subject return to where it had originally been. “The Knights have nothing but benefited from his presence, and alchemy has exploded as an art from just fixing occasional objects to something far more vast and useful. He single-handedly introduced all of Mondstadt to the extent of its capabilities.”

Diluc would have been lying if he said he wasn’t intrigued. A topic for another time. There was so much he wanted to ask, but he suspected the big questions would go unanswered for now. He tried to think of something else, but came up blank; honestly he was scared now. If Kaeya was struggling so much to think of something nice… He didn’t think he could endure anything else like that; not that day.

His chest hurt, and looking at the grave made it sting even worse. Knowing he would never come here with his father by his side, that the man would never walk through the winery doors and call for his sons with that affectionate tone…

He resisted the urge to latch onto Kaeya again, and instead made himself stand. “Can we go to the city? Just for a walk?” He asked. “I… don’t want to be here right now.”

Kaeya blinked, seeming to be surprised. A beat later he nodded. “Alright. Do remember we wish to keep your condition a secret, though.”

Diluc fixed his vest and folded his handkerchief up to return it to his breast pocket. “I know, I know. I’ll let you lead?”

Kaeya hesitated. “Don’t be obvious about it.”

That was met with a raised eyebrow, but again Diluc decided not to ask yet.

Yet.

Chapter Text

Diluc took a moment at a nearby stream to wash his face, trying to cover the evidence that he had been sobbing his eyes out while Kaeya stood at a distance keeping watch. Diluc wasn’t sure why he would, given how safe the area was, but he decided not to ask.

In all honesty, Kaeya’s behavior since they met in Jean’s office was baffling. One moment Kaeya would be fussing over him, his attention laser focused on how to best approach his condition, and the next he would give him such a wide berth Diluc would almost suspect he was being avoided. At least once they were having a semi normal conversation, acting like they normally did, only for Kaeya to suddenly withdraw, almost as though he remembered something.

The back and forth was honestly dizzying, and he struggled to understand why. He puzzled over it as they set off towards Mondstadt, numerous potential reasons coming to mind and just as quickly dismissed as impossible.

He returned his focus to the present moment as they reached the main path, looking to his brother. He noticed quickly that the wall was up again, Kaeya walking a few paces ahead of him, a cold aura coming from him. Diluc was getting sick of it, so he decided to do take matters into his own hands.

“So.” Diluc began casually, making Kaeya glance over as they walked. “I noticed we didn’t bother getting horses.”

“Ah, Grand Master Varka took most of them. You stubbornly refused to let him requisition some of yours, but they’re busy with other things.”

“Wait, you’re telling me he took all the horses and, by extension, all of the cavalry… And left behind the Cavalry Captain? ” Diluc’s indignation was visible, making him briefly forget his original goal. Kaeya actually laughed softly.

“Perhaps he felt I was more useful here in the city.” The Captain shrugged as he led the way towards Mondstadt, having them pass the slightly safer southern route.

“That must be it.” Diluc nodded with crossed arms. “You were always valuable, and smart, and… way more clever than I could ever be. I’m happy to see you finally get the recognition you deserve for it.” Diluc smiled, a warm beam that Kaeya stared at with absolute astonishment.

A beat later the man averted his gaze, his eye filled with what almost seemed like guilt.

“Kae? What’s wro-”

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.” Kaeya immediately tried to deflect, any attempt at subtlety thrown out the window as his strides lengthened. Diluc’s own legs were long and he was easily able to keep pace, trying to get in front of him. Diluc suddenly remembered his goal, and saw another instance of his observation right in front of him.

“Kae, don’t lie to me! What happened?” Concern and frustration was in his voice, and Kaeya simply averted his gaze even further and attempted to put distance between them.

Reaching out, Diluc did the best thing he could manage and grabbed the fluffy cloak Kaeya wore and yank ed .

Kaeya let out a surprised choking noise and stumbled backwards, unprepared for the sudden shift in direction paired with Diluc’s unpreparedness for his own sheer strength. Kaeya lost his balance and fell flat on his backside, grunting in discomfort and looking annoyed. He tried to fix the now twisted garment, his back to Diluc.

“Kaeya, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” Diluc began his apology, stepping around to face Kaeya. Kaeya waved it off and pulled himself up before Diluc could try to help, brushing himself off.

“I’m fine. Sorry.” The bluenette sighed and turned to give Diluc his attention, evidently resigned to this discussion. “Look, there’s a lot going on, please don’t overthink things. You are not the only one distressed by our current circumstance.”

Ah…

Diluc hadn’t considered Kaeya’s perspective on things, and suddenly felt a bolt of shame.

“I’m sorry.” He said, genuinely. Kaeya’s expression twitched, but was schooled neutrally and he simply nodded.

“Lets get a move on.” Kaeya’s tone was flat as he turned to resume his journey on the road, leaving Diluc to follow behind quietly like a scolded puppy.

Kaeya had really changed, hadn’t he? In the past, he was more inclined to bend to Diluc, stand behind him in support, heed his ideas and opinions without much resistance.

This Kaeya… was nothing like that. Firm, unmoving, closed off. Every conversation took effort, and rarely did anything flow organically; often Diluc was the one pushing their chats, with Kaeya doing what he could to end them.

With a furrowed brow, Diluc began to consider how to go about asking about it since his first attempt was met with so much failure, but found his pondering was cut short by cackling laughs that sent a shiver of anxiety up his spine.

Instantly Kaeya was in a fighting stance, sword drawn and a lethal glint in his eye. Diluc followed his lead and reached for his own blade, the massive and ornate claymore feeling both awkward and at home in his hands.

They were small, floating in the air and wearing beak-like masks. Both were furry, similar to the coat that Kaeya wore. One was blue, the other red, and they hovered just out of the brothers’ reach.

“Ah, it seems our fellow’s efforts were not entirely in vain.” The blue one muttered with a chuckle, the red one only making a small chirping noise in affirmation.

No more words were spoken and the two beings summoned energy. Diluc quickly realized that they could wield the elements of Hydro and Pyro, and a beat after that he realized what they were. He’d never encountered one himself, but he had heard of them.

“Are those Abyss mages? ” Diluc asked in astonishment.

Kaeya actually swore . “Are you telling me you- Whatever, just be careful! They have shields we’ll need to break through!”

Something in the back of Diluc’s mind supplied that he would be fairly unhelpful in said task, but he would be damned if he didn’t try anyway.

Old habit kicked in and Diluc moved to Kaeya’s blind side, hefting the bulky weapon. Normally he led their attacks, but something about Kaeya told him that attempting that would end badly, and opted to give up the lead this time.

In a blink Kaeya moved, sprays of cryo energy lashing out to strike the hydro abyss mage and place visible cracks in the shield, ice forming on the surface. The graceful mastery Kaeya showed in his control old Diluc that Kaeya had been in possession of his Vision for at least a couple years.

Shaking away the distraction, Diluc acted on reflex and charged, kicking off the ground with his sword prepared to swing. Flame enveloped the blade as he went airborne, twisting to swing the blade down-

Only to sabotage himself by trying to correct his muscle memory, missing the abyss mage by almost half a foot and losing his balance as steel embedded itself deeply into the ground.

The abyss mage recovered from the small heart attack it just suffered and teleported out of the way, summoning a ball of hydro and hurling it at the amnesiac.

Diluc was about to abandon his sword in favor of dodging, but at the last moment a wall of ice erected, deflecting the hydro and protecting them from a wave of flame. In that moment Diluc realized he had forgotten about the pyro mage, and cursed himself for his slip-up.

“Diluc, I don’t know what’s going on but for the love of the Archons, get it together or get out of the way.” Kaeya bit out, his temper audible as he fought to keep his shield from melting against the onslaught of fire.

“I’m not used to this sword!” Diluc argued, ripping it free from the ground.

“I haven’t seen you use anything else since you came back! Figure it out!” Kaeya shifted his stance and spikes of cryo shot from the wall, crashing into the shield of the pyro mage and making it fall back in alarm, the hydro mage moving to stay at its side.

“ ’Figure it out’.” Diluc muttered petulantly, hefting the massive blade a couple times and trying to summon some manner of deeper familiarity.

Kaeya was engaged with both mages, cryo, hydro, and pyro flaring and flinging in a cacophony of elemental reactions that Diluc honestly struggled to keep up with. Gripping his sword tightly in his gloved hands, the amnesiac resolved himself to do something in this encounter and kicked forward.

Before he had felt his body try move on its own, but when he had tried to correct, he wound up faltering. Clearly part of him knew what it was doing; a him that wasn’t him that tried to take reins that he had ripped from their hands. This time…

This time he would trust the Him that wasn’t him. Again he launched himself into the fray, feeling instinct and muscle memory kick in once more as he twisted in the air. Flame trailed behind him and clung to his sword in the wide arc he swung, the massive and familiarly unfamiliar sword carving hell through the air.

Like before he felt the urge to correct his trajectory and change his course, but this time he forced himself to just move naturally, allowing reflex to take control and guide his blow.

Steel met its mark and struck the pyro abyss mage’s shield with such force that the tiny entity was launched back into a boulder, the shield shattering and leaving the fluffy thing reeling.

“That’s more like it.” Diluc could hear Kaeya half laugh, his smile audible in his tone as the Cavalry Captain turned his full focus on the now-frightened hydro mage.

Diluc understood and turned his own to the pyro mage, approaching with brandished blade.

“Wait-wait! Mercy, please!” The chaotic voice of the being before him warbled and sounded strange, as though filtered through a Fontaine device. “Please!”

Diluc’s hand stilled, his mind racing. His duty as a knight called upon him to have honor; clearly this being surrendered, so striking it down would be an unrighteous act.

So why did he have to grip the hilt of his sword so tightly, and keep his arm from swinging as his chest burned with venom? How bright and hot the desire to end that weeping monster was, that his conscious will could only barely fight the urge to act.

This wasn’t him, this wasn’t how he was.

This wasn’t him-

He screwed his eyes shut on reflex as he fought his internal battle, and in that moment the mage saw its chance to act. Immediately it summoned its abyssal magic, a swirl of inky darkness in its hand-

That cut immediately as Kaeya’s blade ran it through. Diluc watched with faint tremors as the thing fell limply to the ground, dead.

“You must be in much worse shape than I expected,” Kaeya began, “if you’re so careless as to close your eyes in front of an enemy.” His tone was not hostile, nor judgmental. It was simply a statement of fact, and despite the ire the amnesiac felt in the face of it, he found himself unable to argue.

No, there was something else that occupied his thoughts; something more pressing.

“...Kaeya.” Diluc said, his voice small as he stared at the slowly fading abyss being.

“What is it?”

“Would I have hesitated?”

Silence passed between the pair, and Diluc knew Kaeya was weighing the worth of an honest answer.

“Please, Kae.”

Kaeya winced, then sighed. “Not for an instant.” He finally answered.

Diluc closed his eyes, feeling a bolt of pain run through his chest as he dismissed his sword. A deep exhale, he turned to face his brother, his introspective worries immediately forgotten at the bright red splotch on the Captain’s arm.

“Kaeya, you’re hurt.” Immediately Diluc closed the distance between them, reaching out and grabbing his brother’s arm and yanking his sleeve up to look. Kaeya let out a squawk of protest, but found himself unable to escape from the other’s brute strength.

“It’s a gash, I’m not going to keel over.” Kaeya protested. “I’ll survive long enough to get to the city.”

“We should treat it anyway. What if we get attacked again?” Diluc argued, using his other hand to force the thinner man to sit on a rock.

Glowering with irritation, Kaeya let Diluc claim victory and allowed him to begin the process of treating the injury.

Kaeya hadn’t been lying, while it was a nasty gash, it wasn’t a terrible wound. Still, there was no reason to leave it untreated.

Diluc cleaned the wound silently, not forcing conversation as he worked. Surprisingly it was Kaeya who broke the silence.

“This ambush was odd.” He said, making Diluc give pause.

“It was?”

Kaeya nodded. “Abyss mages have become more active lately, yes, but they don’t tend to actively ambush people; not people like us, anyway… Not on these main roads.”

“… You think it’s connected.”

“I do.”

Diluc hummed softly in thought as he finished his work, drawing a dagger from his boot and heating it. “Once I cauterize it, we can-”

“No.” Kaeya was already on his feet, and had Diluc not known any better, would argue he was fleeing . “Just wrap it with a cloth and we’ll call it good.”

“But if we-”

“I said no , Master Diluc.” Kaeya’s voice was a bite, and it was enough to get the message across. Almost deflated, Diluc nodded softly and returned the blade to its sheath.

Reluctantly Kaeya returned to his side long enough for a bandage to be secured to his arm, and the pair resumed their trip to the city.

Diluc’s head was swimming, awash with questions and worries that he felt he couldn’t puzzle out on his own. Kaeya walked a couple paces ahead of him, close enough to not be questioned, but far enough to raise them. The rest of the journey to Mondstadt was made in silence, Diluc unsure of what to say and Kaeya clearly unwilling, that distance once more forced between them.

Something had rattled Kaeya greatly, and the only thing he could think of was the offer to cauterize the wound. Kaeya didn’t used to be so adverse to it; it sucked, for sure, but generally he grit his teeth and tolerated it…

-

The city of Mondstadt came into view and Kaeya sped his steps, only slowing down to allow Diluc to catch up as they reached the bridge. Now in view of people, the Captain behaved more ‘normally’, walking across the stone pathway and nodding to the two gate guards.

“Captain Kaeya, Master Diluc; welcome back.” One of the two greeted. Diluc could only return the greeting softly, consciously keeping himself from smiling. It felt uncomfortable; almost rude.

“We’ll grab food to go from Good Hunter and head to the Headquarters.” Kaeya finally spoke for the first time in the last hour, half glancing back.

“Ah, alright.” Diluc’s voice was small and hesitant as he followed behind his brother. He stood aside as Kaeya spoke to the woman at the counter to place their order, and took the chance to look around.

It was then that he noticed people staring, some whispering softly amongst themselves. Worry spiked, and Diluc crept closer to his sibling to whisper.

“People are staring.” He reported.

“Let them stare.” Kaeya turned to glance back. “It’s nothing to worry about, it’s not like this is the first time we’ve shared a table.”

“But why are they staring?”

“Ask later. They simply don’t know how to keep their noses out of the business of others.”

Shut down again, Diluc could only frown, barely preventing a full-on pout.

Food acquired, they silently made their way up the flights of stairs and towards the Knights of Favonius headquarters.

Unlike last time, more details made themselves apparent to him, and something in the back of his head almost itched with irritability.

“Why are there so many Fatui in the city?” He found himself asking, voice low.

“Diplomats, nothing of concern.” Kaeya answered.

“If they’re just diplomats, then why do I feel angry just looking at them?”

To this Kaeya actually snorted a faint laugh. “A good question.~” He replied cryptically. “Come on, we’re almost there. They are of delicate sensibility and would raise a ruckus if they heard you. We should keep such talk to closed doors.”

Wise enough advice, and Diluc simply sighed in annoyed acceptance.

Chapter Text

The brothers’ boots echoed across the wide hall of the Favonius Headquarters as the door swung closed behind them. It was mercifully cooler inside, the mid august month having become sweltering that year. Diluc silently cursed his modern self’s desire to wear so much heavy black, subtly flapping his coat to allow some air in before he melted.

The sound of small footsteps charging down the stairs made him look up, just in time to watch a tiny red and gold child launch herself onto Kaeya’s legs and latch on.

“Kaeya! Kaeya! Klee is so happy to see you! You’ve been so hard to find; we were supposed to go fish bl-” The child stopped. “Um, ‘fishing’ together yesterday. You never showed up!”

“Ah-” Kaeya went still for a moment, his expression shifting to realization. Looking apologetic, he kneeled to the girl’s level and rested a hand on her shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Klee. Something came up and I forgot.”

“You made a promise, and you should always keep your promises!” Klee crossed her arms in a pout.

“You’re absolutely right. I promise you that I had a very good reason, though.” Kaeya spoke softly and tried to pull the girl into a small hug.

A brief resistance, Klee pouted more. “What was so important that you forgot about your promise?”

Kaeya hesitated, and Diluc knew the Captain well enough to tell he had to keep himself from glancing over.

“Someone… important, had an accident. I had to look after them.”

Immediately Klee’s entire demeanor shifted, and any indignance she possessed was gone in an instant and replaced with worry. “Oh no, are they okay?”

“They’re not better yet, but they’re not in any danger.” Kaeya assured, successfully pulling Klee into a hug on his second try. “I’m sorry I broke my promise. I can’t say when I’ll have time again, but I’ll take you ‘fishing’ as soon as I can, okay?”

Diluc watched the exchange, marveling quietly at Kaeya’s interaction with the child. His entire countenance had changed to one of soft assurances, the smile sincere and reminiscent of the ones Diluc once knew.

“Fine. Klee forgives you since you had to take care of this important person.” The Spark Knight gave Kaeya a squeeze and half skipped back. “Well, Klee promised to play with Diona, so I gotta go!”

“Be careful, and remember the ‘rules’, now.”

“I will-” Klee turned then to go, stopping short as she finally caught sight of Diluc.

Like before, her entire demeanor shifted, though this time to one of discomfort as she fiddled with the straps on her bag.

“U-Um. Hi Master Diluc.” With a couple more awkward shuffles she skirted around him. “Bye!”

And in a flash the girl was gone and out the door, leaving Diluc puzzled as to what the hell just happened.

“I presume you have questions?” Kaeya broke the silence first.

“I do, yes.” Diluc shook himself from his daze and gave Kaeya his full attention. “Please.”

“Let’s go somewhere away from prying eyes, I’ll tell you about her.”

“Can you at least explain why she acted like that?”

“You’re one of the ‘Weird Adults’.~” Kaeya smiled almost teasingly. “We’ll leave it at that for now. Come on, the others are waiting for us.” Kaeya tilted his head to Jean’s office and made his way over. Diluc made himself take solace in the fact that, at the very least, Kaeya seemed comfortable enough to tease.

The door to Jean’s office opened with nary a squeak and the two men stepped through, Kaeya allowing Diluc to walk past so he could close and lock the door.

Taking a quick assessment of the people in the room: Jean, and a face he didn’t recognize.

“Um-” He started, before trailing off, looking at the stranger.

“Ah, that’s right, Lisa came after...” Jean mumbled before standing, gesturing to the purple and white clad woman, who looked every bit like a witch from his childhood stories. “This is Lisa, the Knights of Favonius Librarian and magic expert. I hope it’s okay that I confided in her about your case; I felt she could offer some insight.”

Kaeya spoke up before Diluc could. “Honestly I’m glad you did. She can help with my newest theory.”

Diluc didn’t mind Kaeya’s interruption, as he honestly had no issue with Lisa’s involvement; if Jean thought she could help, he would trust her judgment.

Kaeya continued to speak.

“On our way here, we found ourselves accosted by a pair of Abyss Mages, who made quite the curious comment.” The Captain explained, setting their food on the table and gesturing for Diluc to sit down. “Pardon if we have lunch while we talk.”

“Quite alright.” Jean pardoned, taking a seat beside Kaeya at the head of the table, with Lisa taking up the side on her left. Diluc sat beside Kaeya and the blonde haired Alchemist, who up until that moment Diluc hadn’t noticed, sat across from him.

“So, we were making our way back from the Winery when two abyss mages appeared and decided they wanted a fight.” Kaeya would begin to explain properly. “They made a comment along the lines of their compatriot’s efforts not being ‘entirely in vain’.”

“I remember them saying that.” Diluc confirmed. “It looked like it was me they were after.”

“Should have sent more mages if they really wanted to take us down.” Kaeya smiled into the cup of tea Lisa had provided him.

“So I’m presuming you think the Abyss Order has something to do with Master Diluc’s amnesia?” Albedo asked, speaking up for the first time that meeting.

“I think it’s almost confirmed. Barbara discovered no injuries, you discovered no toxins, Master Diluc has no memory of exactly what happened, and he woke up outside of a domain. Surely that leaves precious few options?” Kaeya lifted his fingers as he counted off.

“I believe it’s worth looking into, yes.” Lisa took a sip of her tea and smiled to Diluc in a way that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. “Are you okay with me taking a peek?”

“Um… Very well, if you feel like it may shed some light...” Diluc schooled his expression and hoped he retained his composure. Like before he stood and followed the woman to another chair.

With a flourish of her hand a book appeared, her other hovering just above Diluc’s head, barely brushing a few hairs and making his scalp tickle. He felt his ears burn slightly and had to keep himself from pouting; it was almost like she was teasing him.

A deep breath and Diluc made himself focus, closing his eyes and letting Lisa begin her work. He could feel the faint waves of elemental energy, and with it the tingle of something he knew he’d never felt before, yet it still felt familiar.

That pattern would go on for what felt like an age, until he heard a soft hum from the witch.

“Now, what is this…?” She murmured softly.

Diluc could almost feel a coil of magic grab hold of something and tug experimentally-

-And with that tug Diluc felt his very soul convulse.

He could hear a wail of agony ringing in his ears, and it took several seconds for Diluc to realize that he was hearing himself. He didn’t know when he hit the floor, curled up in a pitiful ball as it felt like his head was about to explode. He clutched his skull tightly as though trying to keep it intact, involuntary tears in his eyes.

He writhed in agony even as he felt multiple hands hauling him up, depositing him carefully on the couch by the window.

He couldn’t understand what they were saying, but at that point the pain became too much and he blacked out.

-

Diluc came back slowly, his head cloudy and hurting. He could faintly make out people talking, but it took him considerable time to regain his wits enough to understand what was being said.

“-unexpected outcome.”

“I apologize, I didn’t anticipate such a violent response; I hardly touched it.”

“What precisely was it?”

“Abyss magic, there is no question about that.”

“It’s a start. Do you two think you can figure out a course of treatment?”

“With how delicate it appears to be, we will have to proceed with immense caution. I propose we take our time with this, and gather information.”

“You mean we’ll have to leave him like this?”

“We can’t say for sure if it’s safe to do anything yet.”

“I agree with our Chief Alchemist. Abyss magic is nothing to toy with; we’ll need to understand exactly what we’re working with before we can safely try anything again.”

Wanting to join the conversation, Diluc opened his mouth to speak, but only managed a pained groan. Immediately he felt a presence at his side and looked over, only to find himself unable to see.

He reached up to feel the obstruction over his face, holding the wet cloth and wincing at the sudden light. Immediately he closed his eyes again, deep in the throes of what was unmistakably a migraine.

“Here-” A soft voice said as the cloth was taken from his hand. A cool breeze and the cloth was carefully replaced over his eyes. Diluc flinched slightly at how cold it was, but relaxed as it soothed the pounding behind his eyes. “How do you feel?”

“Like my skull is going to explode.” Diluc managed to get out, shifting to stretch the back of his neck and try to alleviate some of the discomfort. “What happened?”

“I’m very sorry, Master Diluc. I discovered the presence of some sort of magic, and in my attempt to figure out what it was, I must have touched something I shouldn’t have.” A few moments of muddled thought supplied that the person talking was Lisa.

“I’ve proposed the possibility that the presence is possibly malignant in nature.” Albedo offered.

“I disagree; it seemed dormant, and it felt more like it was attached to something, and by messing with it I messed with whatever it was connected to.” Lisa argued gently.

“I don’t believe now is the best time to discuss this.” Kaeya. “I understand it was an accident, but I don’t feel like he’s in any shape to process any of this information.”

“Very well. I will return to my lab and begin looking into what I can. Given we cannot harness abyss magic ourselves, I will look to see if there are any options with the leylines.” Boots turned and faded, the sound of the door opening and closing signifying the Alchemist’s departure.

“I will begin my own research. It’s hard to say how much time this will take, unfortunately.”

“Do what you can.”

“I will, Jean, don’t you worry your head about a thing.”

“Thank you.”

Heels clicked and once more the door opened and closed.

“Jean, can you do me a favor?”

“What is it, Kaeya?”

“Can you clear a path to my office? I doubt Diluc wishes to be seen like this, and no doubt there will be people needing to come here.”

“Ah, I understand. Give me a few moments.”

He heard Jean leave, and reveled in the complete silence of the room. All he could hear was his own breathing, and that of his brother’s by his side.

Shortly Jean returned. “Come on, we don’t have long.”

“Apologies.” A single word was all the warning Kaeya gave before he scooped the amnesiac up princess style, earning a groan of discomfort from the man.

“Just hang on and you can sleep.”

Part of Diluc wondered why they didn’t take him to the infirmary, but the answer was already given and he just tolerated it.

Without issue the trio made it to Kaeya’s office, Jean opening the door and helping them inside. Diluc was lowered carefully onto a couch and then heard the sound of blinds being pulled closed.

Movement done, Diluc decided the pain was too much, and tried to sleep, ignoring the faint whispers of the two Knights across the room.

-

Diluc woke for the second time, and he found that the pain in his head had abated to a dull throb; easily ignored. He reached up and pulled the now only slightly-damp cloth from his face and sat up slowly. He became aware of his dizziness and thirst as he did, groaning softly as he settled himself upright. Slowly he began to survey his surroundings.

Hours had passed, as the sun had set and now pale moonlight passed through the slight gaps in the curtain. It was pitch black beyond that, so Diluc gave a quick tug of the curtain and pulled it aside to allow light to filter in.

It was Kaeya’s office, and he was alone-

Wait, no, that wasn’t true.

There, hunched over the desk, was a figure.

Diluc moved to stand, only to become briefly tangled in the blanket that had found itself upon him. Extracting himself, he threw it over his shoulders and slowly made his way over to the desk, peering more closely at the person laying upon it.

Kaeya; to the surprise of no one. His head was resting on one arm, the other holding a quill that lay slack in his fingers. The pot of ink sat open, and with a quiet click Diluc closed it before the whole thing dried out.

He then took the time to examine the desk in more detail, noting the reports, letters, and documents; Captain work, and a lot of it.

And lots still to do…

Diluc passed his brother a glance, looking over his sleeping form. The dark bags under his eyes betrayed his fatigue, and in this moment he could see just how the years had tired him out.

Quietly he blanket changed shoulders, draped carefully over the Captain as Diluc fished out what incomplete paperwork he could.

Taking a seat at a nearby table, he took a pot of ink and a quill of his own and began to do what he could; he was a Captain himself not that long ago, after all.

Hours later Kaeya would wake to find Diluc asleep once more on the couch, a stack of completed documents placed neatly on the corner of his desk, and a blanket draped over his own shoulders.

Chapter Text

Diluc nursed a large plate of eggs and sausage as he listened to the report Lisa and Albedo were giving, explaining the events of the previous night. The group of them, including Jean and Kaeya, were gathered in the Cavalry Captain’s office, each with a plate of breakfast on tables or laps.

“It seems whatever magic has done this to you isn’t inclined to let go easily. It will take time to figure out how to help you, I’m afraid.” Lisa explained.

“I will need to run multiple experiments to ascertain the precise nature of your condition, and will be working closely with Lisa to this end.

“They aren’t going to, um, hurt , right?” Diluc was hesitant, justifiably so given what had happened the day prior.

“We will be far more careful going forward.” Albedo assured. “So there should be no repeat of yesterday.”

Lisa nodded her assent. “I will not be so careless a second time, I promise.”

“Alright then.” Diluc sighed. “If Jean and Kaeya trust you, then I will too.”

Jean smiled at that, while Kaeya briefly averted his eyes.

“How long do you think it will take?” Jean asked.

“That’s hard to say. It could take us a week, it could take us a year. Until we know more, I can’t put a time table on it.” Lisa sighed.

“Unfortunately, I feel Lisa is correct. Until more information is gathered, it’s impossible to come up with a prognosis.” Albedo sat his half finished plate of food aside, which Kaeya shamelessly claimed for himself.

“You’re all so adamant on hiding my amnesia from the public. What am I supposed to do, then?” Diluc asked, beginning to feel a little frustrated at the whole situation.

“For now we’ll have to watch over you until the public gets a bit more used to your, um… Behavior shift.” Jean mused. “Once things settle, it should be fine to let you go about on your own. We’ll need to worry about Abyss Order ambushes, though.”

“We should leave him in Albedo and Lisa’s care for now.” Kaeya suggested, finishing his coffee.

“Absolutely not.” Albedo shot the idea down with a firmness that made the Cavalry Captain wince . “While I will need Master Diluc’s cooperation for some experiments, I cannot afford to be distracted by playing babysitter.”

“Hey-”

“I’m afraid I too will be much too busy to look after him, if you wish any speed with our work.” Lisa agreed more tactfully, even as she cut off Diluc’s annoyed exclamation.

“I’d rather go with Kaeya, anyway.” Diluc managed to get in.

“Kaeya, I’m going to have to ask you to stay by Diluc’s side for the foreseeable future.” Jean took Diluc’s side, which he found quite favorable. What he didn’t like was the almost betrayed look Kaeya passed both the Alchemist and the Grand Master, before sighing and accepting.

“Yes, Acting Grand Master.” Kaeya gave in.

Jean stood and began the process of bundling all the papers from Kaeya’s desk. “I’ll go ahead and take these off your plat- huh.” Mid-sentence she cut off in mild surprise. “It’s all done?”

“It seemed old habits die hard and a certain someone decided to finish it after I’d fallen asleep last night.” Kaeya reported. “I looked over it; it’s acceptable for submission.”

“Well then, thank you for your help, Master Diluc. I hope it wasn’t too much of a strain.” Jean bowed her head to him in thanks.

“It was nothing; I felt better and was too awake to sleep. It whittled away the time.” Diluc waved off the gratitude with a fond smile.

Another nod and Jean left the room, Albedo leaving his plate behind for Kaeya to contend with and following after Lisa. He’d pause long enough to glance back to his fellow Captain, his expression unreadable.

He and Kaeya seemed to have some sort of silent exchange before the blonde left, leaving the brothers alone.

“So, what do you want to do, then?” Kaeya asked with a sigh. “I’m officially assigned as your keeper, so we’re at your whim.”

Diluc sat his fork down and pondered. A lot had just happened, and the implications of it all were…

Well, he didn’t like them. At all .

He lifted his head with a decision for his course of action.

“I want to go to Springvale.” He said.

Kaeya lifted an eyebrow. “Oh? Can I ask why?”

“Yes, but I’m not telling you.” Diluc replied almost childishly, putting his plate on top of the two empty ones, thus making it Kaeya’s problem. “I’m going to wash up before we go.”

With that Diluc left Kaeya alone in his office, allowing himself a moment of solitude to reflect on everything that just happened in the last 24 hours.

-

The trip to Springvale was quiet in multiple ways. Nothing attempted to get in their way, but neither did either of them talk. Kaeya, closed off as normal, and Diluc in his own head and puzzling over how he was going to address things going forward.

The noon sun hung high in the air when they arrived, and Diluc walked silently through the village, nodding politely to all who greeted him as he made his way to the lake. The strange stone structure hovered in the small island as it always did, and the ever familiar calla lilies surrounded the edge of the whole thing.

Diluc felt gratitude as he knelt and gently plucked one of the flowers, grateful that the lake was so kind as to remain unchanged for the last four years. It was comforting to see something exactly as he remembered it.

That small gift in his heart, Diluc found the nerve to speak up. With a sharp turn, he faced his brother and steeled his will.

“Kaeya.”

His tone was enough to get Kaeya’s immediate attention, the man looking over from where he had been gazing out at the distance. “Hm?”

“Why are you acting like this?”

“You’re going to have to be more specific, Master Diluc.”

“That! And a lot of other things!” Diluc snapped. “You keep calling me ‘Master Diluc’. You’re pushing me away. Every time we act like brothers you suddenly put up this wall ! And just this morning- it was almost like you didn’t want to be with me! You tried to pawn me off on the others!”

Kaeya’s lips turned into a tight line, and for once the talkative man was rendered silent.

“Why, Kaeya? Why don’t you want to be by my side? Why don’t you want to help me? Are you mad at me?” Diluc began to beg.

Kaeya broke and looked away, pain in his expression.

“Kaeya, please.”

“I...” A hesitation. “It’s not that I don’t want to.” He began.

“Then why?”

“It’s because you wouldn’t want me to.”

Diluc blinked as the revelation sank in. “What?”

“I’m not mad at you, Master Diluc. Quite the opposite, actually.” Kaeya continued, his voice soft. “I just know for a fact you don’t actually want my help or proximity in this situation; even if you don’t know it right now.”

“But I do want your help! How could I not? You’re my brother!” Diluc’s voice barely kept from cracking as he almost begged his words to be true.

Kaeya shook his head and smiled sadly. “We had a falling out, Diluc, four years ago. Just before you left.”

It was the amnesiac’s turn to fall into a stunned silence.

“You hate me, and I don’t blame you for it. I’m distant because I’m trying to respect your boundaries while you’re in this state…” Kaeya continued. “As I said before, you’re quite easily taken advantage of right now...”

The implication of that statement settled, but all Diluc could focus on was-

“I don’t hate you! I could never hate you!” He almost shouted, taking a step forward with Kaeya taking a matching step back, smooth and casual. The Captain frowned and averted his gaze.

“You can’t know that; not truly. I’m just trying to minimize the inevitable fallout for when you remember.”

“I don’t believe you! This is just some unfunny joke, right?” Diluc fell into denial. “This is just one of your dumb pranks, and in a second you-”

“You asked me how I got my Vision.” Kaeya cut him off, his tone harsh with what sounded like desperation. “Remember?”

Diluc felt a cold chill go down his back as he nodded wordlessly.

“I got it fighting for my life. I got it that night we fought; the night Father died.” Kaeya explained, his tone moving to be equal parts pleading and insistent. “My Vision appeared while I was defending myself from your sword. You were trying to kill me and this Vision stopped your flames from succeeding.”

“Why…?” Diluc’s voice was small, then gained force. “ Why? ”

“It isn’t important.” Kaeya dismissed, looking away.

“Yes it is !” Diluc snapped, taking a few quick steps closer. “If you won’t tell me why, then I’m just going to assume you’re wrong .”

Surprise rooted Kaeya to the spot, allowing the older man to grab the Captain’s arm in a hard grip.

“I… I believe in you, Kaeya. Nothing could make me hate you like you believe.” Diluc said, resolved. He knew himself, and he knew Kaeya.

He believed in his own judgment, and through that he believed in his brother. With that resolve, he smiled and loosened his grip.

“I trust you, Kaeya, but you’re wrong.” Diluc said, his tone softer and sincere. “I want you by my side through this. I need you by my side through this.”

Kaeya’s lone eye was wide with bewilderment, and after a moment he ripped his arm free.

“I need a moment.” A curt sentence and Kaeya walked away, leaving Diluc to stand by the lake’s edge alone.

Kaeya paced around, his eye narrowed in thought, though far enough away that any expression he may have worn beyond that was obscured. Kaeya made an active effort to keep Diluc from seeing or gleaning anything until he was ready, and slowly walked back.

He looked emotionally exhausted, and sighed softly.

“I’ll do what you ask of me for now.” Kaeya relented. “But you aren’t allowed to resent me for it when you’re back to normal, got it?”

Diluc frowned. “If remembering would truly be so damaging, I wonder if it wouldn’t be better to leave those memories to rot.”

Kaeya said nothing at that, again sighing.

Diluc turned, looking out over the lake. “Do you remember our promise as kids, Kaeya?” He began, his voice soft and almost a wisp. “The one we made right here, sitting among the calla lilies as the sun set. I meant it, you know.”

Silence spread between the pair. After some hesitation, Diluc spoke again.

“It’s pretty obvious, based on everything I’ve gleaned and your constant refusal to tell me much of anything, that things were pretty bad...weren’t they?”

“...Everything I know as fact… isn’t great, no.” Kaeya answered quietly. “If there is much good, I’m not aware of it. There’s also a three year gap that’s entirely unaccounted for… No one knows anything about your sojourn.”

“Hm… I’ll see what I can find in journals. I don’t care what you say, I have the right to go through any documents I find on my property.”

Kaeya sighed in defeat and nodded, crossing his arms. “I still reserve the right to withhold some information. I… don’t want to unload everything in one go.”

Diluc frowned, displeased but unable to argue.

“Lets head back to the city. Do you think I’d have a change of clothes at the Angel’s Share?” He asked, letting the subject change.

“After Sister Rosaria ‘accidentally’ dumped a glass of wine on you, you’ve taken to keeping a couple changes of clothes in the upstairs office, yes.” Kaeya did finger quotes as he ratted his friend out.

“Ah, I remember her at least. Still a troublemaker?” He asked, to which Kaeya could only give a knowing smirk.

“Only as much as you are.”

-

The pair entered the Angel’s Share, the door striking a small bell that alerted those present to their arrival. It wasn’t so early that the bar was empty, but there were only a couple patrons present at the time.

Charles looked up and half bowed to Diluc. “Master Diluc, good afternoon.” He greeted. “I hadn’t expected to see you; were you wanting to run the bar today?”

Diluc blinked at this new information, but quickly shook his head. “Ah, no, not today. I’m just here for a change of clothes.”

A simple nod and Charles returned to his work, not holding his boss up any more than he had to. Kaeya settled at the bar and Diluc could hear the request for a small glass of wine be made as he scaled the stairs.

It only took Diluc a minute to examine his key ring and find the key to the third floor, closing the door at the top behind him and taking a few moments to look around.

It was the same familiar loft of a room that he remembered, with a bed in the corner for the nights where it was too late to return home. He noted the absence of the two additional cots that were normally folded up against the back wall, used by the brothers when the three of them remained overnight.

Diluc clenched his jaw and turned to the cabinet against the back wall. He quickly found the clothes and started the process of peeling off the layers he was wearing. He tried not to look at his own body too carefully as he did, the sight of unfamiliar scars tempting further investigation he knew would only upset him as he learned a body that wasn’t his.

Draping his massive coat and vest over the chair nearby, he went over the limited options in the cabinet. He really didn’t want to wear black, but to his chagrin could only find more of the same dark colors.

With a resigned sigh he gave in and accepted his fate. Using a nearby wash basin he cleaned up the best he could before switching his clothes out for the clean set, briefly considering abandoning the jacket. With an affected sigh he put it back on, assuming not wearing it would be considered odd for him.

By the time he came back down the stairs, Kaeya had finished his glass of wine and was occupying himself by spinning his coin on the bar. The gold Mora piece was snatched up in a smooth movement as the Captain finally saw Diluc’s return, standing with an air of ease that the Amnesiac knew was false.

“Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.” Diluc replied, not bringing it up.

“To headquarters, then.” With a turn on his heel, Kaeya led the way out of the bar, passing Charles a farewell.

As the pair walked, Diluc adjusted his coat again and couldn’t keep himself from muttering irritably. “Why do I wear so much black?”

Kaeya snorted so hard it sounded like he hurt himself.

Chapter Text

Their return to the Favonius Headquarters was met with little to no fanfare, with the knights at the doors only passing the duo a brief look rather than a full-on-gawk like before.

Given the proximity, the library that was where Kaeya took them first. He quickly found the woman he was looking for, buried in books in the restricted section.

“This will take more time, Sweetie.” Lisa chided Kaeya softly. “I feel absolutely terrible for yesterday, so I want to make sure I’m familiar with everything that could be the cause before I try anything.”

“It was an accident.” Diluc tried to soothe the Witch’s guilt, but she smiled and waved it off.

“Perhaps, but one I shall not be repeating. Now do give me some peace so I can read, would you? I’m sure Captain Albedo would be more than happy to receive you.~”

Politely but firmly shooed away, Diluc followed his brother as the man led them through the winding hallways, coming to what used to be one of the large storage rooms. The old wooden double doors since replaced with thick and solid wood that looked capable of surviving a siege.

‘Or an explosion.’ Diluc’s mind supplied unhelpfully, looking at the ‘experiment in progress’ sign on the door. Kaeya glanced briefly at it before reaching to his hip and withdrawing a key, turning the lock and slowly opening the door.

“Oh Chief Alchemist.~” Kaeya almost purred, even as he slipped into the room with an abundance of caution that could only have been born from experience. It was only once Diluc was given the signal to follow did he dare step inside.

He look a moment to look around the room as Kaeya re-locked the door, taking in the shelves that reached the ceilings, filled with jars, cans, bottles, and apparatus of a dozen varieties. An eclectic selection of machines and bits of equipment that he couldn’t even begin to place filled the floor space, with one such device being the subject of the Alchemist’s attention.

“I presume you’ve come with the hope of some manner of update on our progress?” Albedo asked, not yet looking at the pair as his gloved hands tweaked a small part somewhere deep inside the contraption. It was only once the short blonde crawled off of it that Diluc noticed that there was a seat attached to it.

“Correct, as always.” Kaeya smiled as Albedo finally stood and picked up a small stack of paper. “Perhaps we can even be so bold as to offer some manner of assistance?”

Albedo gently smacked Kaeya’s forehead with the documents, his expression peacefully neutral as always. “If you could cease laying it on quite so thick, I’ll perhaps consider accepting your offer for help.” He said.

“That’s asking for quite a bit, I do think.~” Kaeya continued to tease, grinning in a way that Diluc recognized immediately. It was that same slightly lopsided grin that Diluc knew so intimately, that he only now realized he hadn’t truly seen since he first ‘woke up’ outside of that domain.

Diluc watched the exchange wordlessly, startling slightly as he was pulled into the discussion.

“Conveniently enough, I have just finished putting together something that should help me begin to understand Master Diluc’s condition.” Albedo said, turning his attention to the red-head. “If you would please have a seat here, I would like to begin some experiments.”

Diluc stood in place, looking at the ‘chair’ he was being offered. Politeness and necessity dictated he oblige, but practicality and preference screamed at him to refuse.

Almost as though sensing Diluc’s thoughts, Albedo spoke again.

“I understand that after last time, and the frightful appearance my machine has, you would bear some reservations.” He said. “But I promise that this should not be harmful in any way, shape, or form. This is simply to allow me to observe.”

Diluc frowned softly and exhaled with a nod. With a quick glance at his brother for reassurance, he made his way to the seat and sat down, scooting back so he was flush to the back of it.

“Very good. Now, please don’t move.”

That was all the warning Diluc got before the short alchemist grabbed something from behind and hauled it up, a metal half-dome secured to a massive arm that hovered just over his head.

“Alright, I will begin the experiment. If you feel anything at all, please alert me immediately; even if what you feel is ‘nothing’.”

With a click the machine hummed to life, and the next hours were spent in the clutches of the ‘Genius Alchemist’. He would hit switches or adjust dials, and each time Diluc would report what he did or didn’t feel. Each time the blonde would write something down or hum softly to himself before proceeding to the next thing.

By the time Diluc was allowed to escape the device, he was wiped.

“Thank you for your cooperation, Master Diluc.” Albedo said, placing his note-filled pad on the table. “That will likely have been an exhausting ordeal for you, so I recommend you get some rest.”

“I’ll do that; I’ll see if maybe there’s an empty room I can borrow here at Headquarters.” Diluc sighed, though Kaeya’s expression immediately drew concern. Diluc looked at his sibling. “What is it this time?” He asked, almost annoyed.

“Ah, well… We want to keep your condition a secret for as long as possible, and staying the night here again is going to raise eyebrows.” Kaeya half-explained.

“What? Why?”

“A lot of reasons. Lets just- I have a house in the city. You can stay with me.” The bluenette sighed in mild frustration, scratching the back of his head. “Come on, let’s head there now. It’s getting somewhat late.”

Diluc glanced at the window, and finally noticed that the sun had gone down. With a frown, he decided not to argue the point for now, but added it to the list of ‘things to yell about later’.

Kaeya took a moment to say goodbye to the alchemist, reaching up to gently grasp his bicep as he smiled. It wasn’t long after that the Captain approached his sibling.

“Ready?” He asked.

“As I’ll ever be, I suppose.” Diluc shrugged softly. “Thank you for your help. Captain Albedo.”

“Of course. Have a good night, Master Diluc.” The soft reply came from behind some machine, and with that the Alchemist was once more eaten by his work.

Kaeya and Diluc made a brief pit stop by Jean’s office to tell her they were going before heading for Kaeya’s home. They took the back paths to minimize prying eyes, and slipped inside the building. Diluc noticed the cool breeze that came from the mist flowers in boxes in front, resting cheerily under his windows.

“I just remembered something. Ah, not remembered-remembered.” Diluc said, quickly clarifying at Kaeya’s lifted eyebrow. “I was just reminded that I had a question. You used to be freezing constantly, but now you don’t seem to be…?”

“Ah, my tolerance to cold went up quite a bit when I received my Vision. The days of turtle necks are behind me.” Kaeya chuckled softly, locking the front door behind them. “Sit down, I’ll heat up something for dinner.”

“Ah! I can help-”

“Maybe for breakfast. You should rest.” Kaeya refused gently, pulling a frying pan from the cabinet and rifling through the mist flower box. “You’ve had a rough last 24 hours.”

“I feel f-” Diluc’s protest was cut with a yawn, and he grumbled at his body’s betrayal. “-fine.”

A small chuckle escaped the Cavalry Captain as he dropped a cut of meat onto the frying pan, the welcoming sizzle filling the air.

Despite being asked to sit, Diluc instead decided to occupy himself by looking around. Kaeya’s home was tidy, the walls filled with shelves of books, neat display cases filled with a random assortment of items, and paintings and photos framed elegantly.

Diluc started with the display case, looking at the assorted items inside. Paper animals, pinwheels, a small doll, glass figurines, wooden carvings, some sort of physics toy, and more. Slowly his eyes moved from the case to the wall, looking at the paintings. He recognized some as his father’s work, which pleased him. Other paintings were brilliantly done, each signed with a golden flower at the bottom corner. One painting stood out due to it’s childish nature, and it took a few moments for Diluc to recognize the people in it.

Standing hand in hand outside a giant tree was a tiny girl in red, holding the hands of a figure that was unmistakably Kaeya, and another blonde figure.

“Who…?” Diluc mumbled softly, trying to place them.

“Albedo. He’s Klee’s older brother.” Kaeya explained as he plated the first Pile ‘em Up, beginning the process of cooking another.

“You two seem close?” Diluc asked.

“You could say that. Anyway, here. Sit down and eat.” Kaeya tapped his nail on the dining table as he put the plate on it, gesturing Diluc over.

The smell hitting Diluc’s nose finally registered and, with it, the realization that he was quite hungry. Without much protest he took his place at the counter, picking up his tableware and tucking in.

A few minutes later Kaeya sat across from him with his own food, and the pair ate in silence. Diluc let his eyes continue to wander as they ate, until his eyes fell on a nearby photo. It was a group photo of some of the knights; Kaeya and Jean, with a brown haired girl who looked somewhat familiar. He saw Albedo there, and Eula, along with a few others.

A dreadful clarity came over him then, as he finally came to terms with what he had begun to suspect since the moment he was first called ‘Master’. The suspicion had grown more and more, but he refused to acknowledge it, because he had faith in his own loyalty...But that photo looked very recent, and…

He wasn’t in it. Sure, maybe he and Kaeya were fighting at the time but he was still a Knight…

Right?

“Kaeya.” He spoke up softly, slowly glancing over.

The man in question looked up from his plate, a silent bid for him to continue.

Diluc swallowed and braced himself.

“I’m not in the Knights anymore, am I?”

Kaeya’s hands stopped, and slowly he sat down his knife and fork. Running a hand through his hair, he sighed and seemed to try to think of how to respond. “Why do you ask?”

“A lot of little things… The fact I don’t have a badge, how you have my old rank, the fact that me being in the Headquarters would be considered odd… The photos here, everyone calling me ‘Master’ Diluc, and not ‘Sir’...” Diluc paused. “And then there is what happened before, with the abyss mage.”

Kaeya lifted an eyebrow.

“It was begging for mercy; it surrendered. As a knight, I would be morally beholden to lay down arms… Yet I wanted nothing more than to run my blade through it despite that… That’s not me.”

Kaeya remained silent for a time, before sighing again.

“...Yeah. You aren’t in the Knights anymore. You resigned shortly after Father died.” Kaeya finally explained.

“Why did I do it?” Diluc asked, unable to figure out why he would ever do such a thing, though comforted with the knowledge that hadn’t been ejected from the ranks. “What drove me to leave?”

Kaeya glanced aside in thought.

“Please Kaeya. I need to know.”

Kaeya closed his eyes and with a faint nod, continued. “Inspector Eroch. After Father died, he… handled the affairs around Father’s death in a… poor manner. It pushed you over the edge and you resigned.”

Diluc blinked, the sheer volume of missing context making that explanation decidedly unhelpful.

“How did… Father die? I don’t understand.” He asked.

“I’d very much rather not tell you.” Kaeya said softly. “To spare you the pain of it.”

“Is that why we fought?”

Kaeya shook his head. “Not quite. It happened the same day, though.”

“Please, can you tell me more?” Diluc almost begged.

With a sigh, Kaeya shook his head and folded his hands in front of him on the table. “Diluc, listen to me. I… Really want you to be able to hold onto what happiness you have right now.” He said, making Diluc’s eyes widen. “Just for a little while longer, before we’re forced to crush it with the truth...”

It was a bold statement, and arguably an unsubstantiated assumption, but Diluc couldn’t bring himself to doubt the resolve behind Kaeya’s words.

Kaeya took the last bite of his food and deposited the plate in the sink. “I’m going to head to bed. Excuse me. Guest room is up the stairs on the left. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“...Good night, Kaeya.” Diluc whispered, idly poking what was left of his larger portion of food as his brother went up the stairs.

The house was silent except for the rhythmic ticking of the grandfather clock in the living room, the only sign time hadn’t stopped. With some effort he finished his food, quickly washing the small amount of dishes in the sink and placing them on the rack to dry; something to occupy himself as his head raced and struggled with itself.

Kaeya was being so resistant. Diluc understood where he was coming from, but the fact was that Kaeya was being too protective. There were things he deserved to know, and Kaeya was being stingy with information…

It was becoming rapidly clear that Diluc was going to have to find his own answers.

He made his way up to the guest room and laid down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. He could hear the movement of his brother in the other room, and laid in wait until he heard the faint creak of bed springs.

He waited about an hour, to be sure Kaeya was asleep, before stealing out of the house silently and making his way to the Dawn Winery.

He would find his own answers; surely the study would offer some measure of information.

Chapter Text

Diluc stole out of the city easily. He slipped past the gate guards and crossed the bridge at a quick pace. Birds flew away in surprise as he reached the end, boots crunching against the dirt.

He was vigilant the entire trip, but was mercifully able to reach the winery with no issues. As he walked up the path he was able to spot movement through the windows, and shortly after the large double doors opened, and maid bowed deeply to him.

“Welcome home, Master Diluc.”

“Ah, thank you.” He said in reflex, briefly wondering if that was ‘out of character’. Based on the smile the maid gave, it wasn’t; it was relieving, and he was glad to learn he was still nice to the staff.

For a brief moment he considered perhaps calling upon Elzer and Adelinde for information, but decided he wanted to find what he could on his own first.

Politely declining a late dinner, he made his way up to his study and settled behind the desk to rest his legs. Slowly he scanned the room, and realization slowly began to dawn that there was… a lot. Shelves of books, some visibly ledgers while others were less easily identified, lined the walls. The task before him was daunting, and he decided to start small and begin with his bag.

Despite having been given it the prior day, he hadn’t actually taken any significant time to go through with it in full detail. Carefully he removed each item, setting them on the surface of the desk. As he pulled out the little disk, it made him pause, looking over it carefully once more before placing it on the corner.

The contents of the bag were fairly mundane; more ledgers and inventory data for Angel’s share. Buried deep in the bottom, however, was something that was worth his attention. A hardbound journal written in a neat hand.

Quickly he copied the first line, and confirmed what he suspected; it was his journal. There were no dates, but from what he could tell the journal was started after his return to Mondstadt. Part of him was displeased, secretly hoping to learn something of his absence. It was the one bit of information he couldn’t rely on anyone else to get.

Slowly he began to read, rubbing his eyes briefly as it began to burn from sleepiness. For the most part it was domestic and uncompelling, though it was nice to be able to get a glimpse into the Him that wasn’t Him’s day to day life.

It took him longer than he would have cared to admit before he consciously noticed something odd. An initial read didn’t flag any of the names as strange, but when he gave them thought he realized that some ‘names’ referenced inside weren’t names.

If he had to guess, they were likely codes. ‘Moondust’, ‘StormArrow’, ‘Scout’, ‘Caliper’, and more. The details were vague at best, and came up only occasionally with the references of simply ‘speaking’ to them. If that was code for something else, he didn’t know.

It was puzzling, to say the least, and a mystery that only grew deeper when he began to come across loose papers tucked inside. At first it was just receipts and random notes, but as he went he began to discover papers written in a language he didn’t understand. The symbols were completely foreign to him, and no amount of staring at them made them any more willing to reveal their secrets.

With a frustrated sigh he tucked them back into the journal and set it aside, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. At some point as he had been going through the documents, his head had begun to hurt; an ache radiating from his eyes.

With a deep breath he forced himself to ease the tension in his body, his shoulders and face relaxing and immediately offering some relief. He gave himself only a few moments to rest, eventually returning to his task and opening the top-most drawer to his right.

Immediately his eyes landed on a leather case. It was clearly high quality, and rested neatly on the very top of everything. Whatever was inside was something he used frequently. It was lightweight and fit comfortably in his hand as he picked it up, and opened easily under gentle pressure.

He had expected to find a nice pen or letter opener inside, so surprise registered as his gaze fell upon a delicate pair of silver glasses, resting neatly in the felt lined box. Surprise turned into confusion and hesitantly Diluc plucked the frames up, schooling his grip as he opened the arms lest he accidentally damage them.

They were pretty, he couldn’t argue that for an instant. Honestly, if he ever needed glasses, they looked like something he wouldn’t mind wearing…

He paused, hesitated, and then slowly brought them up to his face.

He remembered a time as a kid where he tried on a merchant’s glasses, immediately ripping them off as his eyes watered in discomfort. He was expecting something similar, and felt more than a little astonished when it didn’t. Not only that, but as he looked around the room with crystal clear clarity, he came to the realization that his vision was abysmal .

A few tests shakes and the glasses didn’t so much as slip from his nose, resting comfortably on his face and allowing him to see without having to squint quite so hard.

Newly remedied eyesight acquired, Diluc found himself having a far easier time going over the many many documents in the study. He began with the desk, pulling out ledgers, notes, business journals, and letters.

He took some time to go over them but found, to his surprise, that none of them were of any particularly personal nature. He then moved to the shelves on the walls, and found documents he was familiar with from the time when his father was alive. Mixed within them were also things that looked like books filled with scouting reports akin to the type the Knights would use, though all penned in his own hand and focused more around the city proper.

A little more looking and he found one that had not been completely filled in yet, meaning that it was most likely the most recent volume. By the time he had found it, though, he found himself growing tired. Still, stubbornness guided him to continue reading.

He had to change the lantern oil out at least once as the night progressed, until his eyes began to burn with fatigue once more. With a sigh he removed his glasses and rested his head on his arm, taking just a moment to rest his eyes before resuming...

-

Diluc woke to the sensation of something tapping his head, and sat up with a surprised jolt. His blurry vision focused on the familiar outline of a blue haired man, and squinted to try to make their expression out better.

“Welcome to the world of the living, sleeping beauty. I suppose I shouldn’t have been at all surprised to find you ran off in the night.” Kaeya half sassed. “What was that about wanting me to stay close?”

Sitting up properly, Diluc’s reply was cut with a loud and wide yawn. He rubbed his face and pulled his glasses back on, too tired to have the energy to squint.

Vision clear, he looked up to regard his sibling properly, only to be met with an expression of utter befuddlement. He’d seen that expression on Kaeya’s face before; specifically when the man experienced multiple emotions and opinions simultaneously, and needed to take a second to reset himself.

“What’s wrong?” Diluc asked, the gentle nudge enough to knock Kaeya from his trance.

“I’ve… never seen you wear glasses before.” Kaeya almost whispered. “Ever.”

“Wh…?” That was one of the most confusing things to him. “Why? My vision is horrible. Everything is so blurry; I didn’t realize it before but I can hardly make out details at a distance and my head hurt so much trying to read until I put them on.”

Suddenly Kaeya snorted, trying to keep from laughing but failing. “Perhaps that’s why you have such a reputation for scowling all the time.” He held his stomach, his efforts failing more and more. “You were always squinting.”

Diluc frowned, embarrassed, but found himself unable to argue the point entirely.

“Well, whatever. Why are you here?” Diluc decided it was time to change the subject, and resisted the urge to remove the glasses just to get Kaeya to stop laughing.

Thankfully the man stopped on his own, though the grin remained. “Well, when I woke up and found you gone, I assumed you likely went somewhere to find some manner of information. What better place to start than your own office?” He explained. “Clearly my presumption was correct, and I arrived to find you peacefully snoozing away after having fled from my care.”

“I’m allowed to do what I want; I don’t need a keeper.” Diluc protested.

Kaeya’s smile faded and he crossed his arms. “You’re correct, but if you’re so adamant on being left to your own devices, then why ask me to stay by your side? You beg me to be close, but then you go and skulk around on your own.”

Thoroughly called out, Diluc felt himself clam up and looked away in guilt. Instead he busied himself with his satchel, beginning to pack it; taking the book that he had been reading the night before and shoving it inside as well.

“Thank you, Kae.” He said finally, not able to make eye contact as he stood. “You’re doing as I asked, and I appreciate you looking out for me.” A hesitation. “But I think I need some time alone. You’re refusing to answer my questions, so perhaps going over things by myself will be more helpful.”

“Recall our concern of biased memories due to partial context.” Kaeya reminded him gently.

“That’s my own concern.” Diluc countered.

With a faint sigh, Kaeya finally caved. “Fine. I’m under orders to look after you right now, so I’m obligated to stay at least somewhat nearby. That said, I’ll give you space and keep a distance. Is that acceptable?”

A slight frown from the amnesiac, but he nodded in understanding. “Alright. I can work with that.”

Turning to go, Diluc made it three steps towards the door before Kaeya’s hand rested on his shoulder.

“Ah, your glasses.” Kaeya said softly.

“What about them? It’s quite nice being able to see.”

“I understand that, but no one has ever seen you with them before. Not in the general population, at least.”

Diluc frowned again. Why did he willfully go blind? “Fine, but I’m taking them with me, at least.” He pouted, but went to his desk to recover the case. Removing the delicate frames, he placed them inside and then tucked the box in his inner coat pocket.

Idly running his fingers through his hair as the pair left the study, Diluc came to a decision.

“Before anything, I need a bath.” He declared.

Thankfully Kaeya gave him no sass and nodded softly. “And perhaps breakfast.” He added, to which Diluc agreed.

Requesting a bath be drawn by one of the maids, Diluc returned to his bedroom and carefully began stripping down his outer layers, placing them in the laundry hamper to be washed.

He opened his wardrobe and began going over his options, once more presented with an almost overwhelming amount of black.

Mondstadt got hot. Why?

With a resigned sigh, he found the lightest colors he could; a white vest and gray shirt with dark slacks, and pulled them out.

A faint knock at his door turned his attention away from his wardrobe woes, and said a soft thanks to the maid as she informed him his bath was ready.

Finding a bathrobe, he slipped into the bathroom and carefully dipped his fingers in the water. It was lukewarm at best; which was comforting. Some things hadn’t changed, and his preference to heat his own bathwater was evidently one of them.

A few minutes and a glow from his Vision later, Diluc sank into the hot water and just soaked, taking his time and allowing the last couple days of stress and grime to wash off.

He had no idea how much time had passed, but the water was beginning to cool by the time he finally let himself surface from his sleepy trance. Heating the water once more, he washed his hair and finally climbed out.

As he toweled himself off and padded across the tiled bathroom, the corner of his eye caught a figure he didn’t recognize. He startled, taking a step back to face them, only to realize the stranger in the mirror was himself.

Immediate discomfort tingled up his spine, and he ripped his gaze away and quickly fled the room, not caring that he dripped onto the bedroom carpet.

He dressed quickly, uncomfortable with his unfamiliar body and unfamiliar scars, glad that he had already covered the vanity mirror with a sheet. He brushed his hair out blindly the best he could and finally emerged from his room, heading down the stairs and seeing Kaeya sitting at the dining table, an empty plate of what was likely his breakfast sitting in front of him as he nursed a cup of coffee.

“Feel better?” He asked, to which Diluc simply nodded. A look of mild skepticism flashed across the Captain’s face, but he remained mercifully silent.

Diluc sat down beside his brother and almost immediately a plate of food was served to him. He silently began to eat, his mind spinning. He hated being so revolted by his own body, but the fact that he was startled by it just compounded what he could only call dysphoria.

Breakfast passed in silence, and after Diluc had his fill he stood and thanked the staff as he wiped his mouth with a napkin.

“Ready to go?” Kaeya asked, to which Diluc nodded. “Let’s get a move on, then.”

Chapter Text

Despite being wary and ready, the brothers managed to make it to Mondstadt without so much as a speck of Abyss magic in their vicinity. Kaeya seemed almost jumpy, so prepared for some manner of ambush that he almost seemed confused when they began to cross the bridge and enter the city proper.

“Don’t look so disappointed.” Diluc smirked teasingly, patting his brother’s back.

Kaeya looked around one more time before exhaling. “Odd...” He murmured. “Why would they not try again with greater numbers…?”

“Obviously we scared them off.~” Diluc replied with cheer, earning only a slight smile from the Captain.

“Well, anyway. I presume you still wish to be on your own for a time?” Kaeya asked.

Diluc nodded. “Yes. I’ll catch up with you tonight. I’m assuming it’s safe to say Lisa or Captain Albedo will need me for something?”

“Most likely, if I know Albedo.” Kaeya confirmed, sighing softly. “I’ll be at the Headquarters if you need me, okay? Please be careful.”

“I will be, no need to worry, Kae. I’ll see you tonight.” A half wave and Diluc struck out on his own, nodding politely to the people who greeted him as he walked down the street.

He could feel Kaeya’s eyes on him, and they did not fade until line of sight was obstructed by the towering town homes of the city.

-

The bell to the door of the Angel’s Share chimed merrily as Diluc stepped inside, and he took a moment to properly look it over as he shoved the key back into his pocket.

“Ah, Master Diluc.” Charles greeted, older than Diluc remembered him being. The last time they crossed paths, he hadn’t had the time to look him over properly. “Manning the bar today?”

“A-ah.” Diluc hesitated. “Apologies, I’m here to go over some documentation upstairs.”

Charles gave a single understanding nod and returned to his work, preparing the bar to open in a few hours.

Their brief exchange over, Diluc silently slipped up the stairs and towards the third floor, locking the door behind him as he did. It wasn’t that he had anything to hide by the action, but more he wasn’t in the mood to be disturbed.

He then set to work. He donned his glasses and began the process of prying into every corner he could, inspecting every loose looking floorboard or crack in the wall. Eventually he concluded that there was nothing to find doing that, and moved on to the shelves. It didn’t take him long to realize that too was fairly useless. The only thing even remotely helpful that he could find was the most recent ledger for the bar.

He dropped the book with a dull ‘thud’ onto the table, sinking into the chair to rest as he contended with the fact that he had, yet again, come up empty on information. Why had he been so allergic to writing things down?

Cursing his past self, Diluc opened the ledger and inspected it, and quickly he discovered it was less a ledger and more the tab history of the common patrons to the Angel’s Share. Slowly he went over some of the names.

Eula
Nimrod
Venti

Nelson

Payne

Bruce

Jack

Quinn

Cyrus

‘Six-Fingered Jose’

Some of the names were familiar, others were not. He flipped through the documents tracking their drink orders and the total costs of each visit, as well as the dates. His hand then stopped as he came across a name he hadn’t expected.

Kaeya.

Slowly he opened to that section, and a moment’s inspection told a concerning story. The stack of paper was worryingly thick, and skimming the drink selection told him a vast majority of it was strong wines or cocktails.

“You drink too much...” Diluc mumbled with worry, frowning softly. “Have things...really been so bad for you?”

Though he remembered nothing, guilt ate at his stomach and demanded his attention. He didn’t think Kaeya was lying when he said they fought, and that things were bad. He was convinced Kaeya was mistaken about being hated, but the fact was…

Kaeya was trying to cope with something, and he wasn’t doing it in a healthy manner.

A soft sigh, Diluc closed the book and returned it to the shelf. He was unsure if he could talk to Kaeya about it or not, and feared that walls would immediately go up if he tried.

Diluc stared at the floor. Surely he had known about Kaeya’s drinking habits. Why hadn’t he stepped in before…?

For an instant the unthinkable flashed through his mind, and he immediately shook his head as though to banish the thought. He did not hate his brother. That was impossible.

Slowly Diluc inhaled, then exhaled, centering himself. He forced himself to focus, and began to think about his next course of action. Clearly Angel’s Share had no information for him; at least, none that he could find.

He began to puzzle over the various mysteries he still had. His and Kaeya’s fight. The full details of why he left the Knights. What happened in those three missing years. The coded paperwork in his journal.

A dull ache filled his chest as he thought of his father, desperately wishing he was there to seek advice from.

Ah.

That was another mystery. The truth of his father’s death…

If what he knew was true, it was an official incident and, as such, there would undoubtedly be records.

Unconcerned with the confusion his visit to the Favonius Headquarters might cause, Diluc set out on his next goal; the records room.

-

The bespectacled records keeper could only blink owlishly at Diluc. “I’m sorry?”

“I said I’d like to see the file of Eroch’s investigation.” Diluc repeated. “And the incident report for my Father’s passing.”

“I- Master Diluc, I’m sorry, I know you were once a Knight, but this information is classified.” The record keeper lowered their voice and leaned forward to speak more quietly. “I can’t just allow a civilian, even you, to just read something like that.”

Diluc wracked his brain for an argument. “My Father’s passing is something I have the right to know, and Eroch’s involvement is closely related to it.” He insisted. “Please?”

The records keeper hesitated, then looked around to check for prying eyes. With a faint sigh they nodded, standing.

“Only because it’s you, Master Diluc.” They said, unlocking the door to the records room and escorting him inside. “Sit down, I’ll bring you the files.”

With a word of thanks, Diluc did as he was asked and sat down at the table. Shortly after two stacks of documents were placed before him.

“Thank you again. Would you terribly mind keeping this a secret?” Diluc asked, his voice low.

“Fine by me; technically you’re not supposed to be in here.”

With mutual understanding, the pair nodded to one another and the keeper left, closing the door behind them with a faint click.

Alone, Diluc started with Eroch’s file.

It was thick, filled with intelligence reports written in both Jean and Kaeya’s hand, amongst others. It became clear that Eroch’s treachery came to a head shortly after his own departure; likely spurred by his father’s passing.

The reports were sorted in chronological order, and made following the sequence of events easier. It seemed that there was suspicion even before the incident, and he had to flip forward a little to the date he wanted. There were two reports, one by Jean, and another by Kaeya. He began with Jean’s, which appeared to be more of an independent investigation journal than an official report.

‘ Inspector Eroch’s decisions have been growing more and more concerning, and finally they’ve reached the point in which even someone as loyal and steadfast as Sir Diluc has been driven to the brink.

Master Crepus’s passing was a strain, but the decision to cover up the incident to preserve the ‘dignity’ of the Knights is unacceptable. It’s becoming more and more apparent that Inspector Eroch cares more for his power and authority than the integrity of the Knights of Favonius, as the resignation of one of our best Captains didn’t so much as make him twitch.

My concerns only grow, and with it my determination to continue my investigation. Sir Kaeya has volunteered to assist me, for which I’m grateful. Between us, hopefully we will be able to find enough evidence to submit our collective reports against him. ’

Diluc frowned softly, guilt creeping up his collar, though with it a measure of confusion.

He decided that perhaps it would be best to face the incident report, and understand the context behind what happened.

Sliding the first file to the side, he hefts the older document. Immediately he felt that there was a little bit of thickness to it, which was notable. Trying not to let his thoughts escape him, Diluc opened to the first page and began to read.

The cover page was simple and standard.

Ordo Favonius Incident Report: April 30 ^th , XXXX
Involved Persons of Note: Crepus Ragnvindr. Diluc Ragnvindr.

Basic Summary: Escort Caravan attacked by Ursa the Drake, fatalities reported.

Diluc inhaled slowly, letting the breath out. He turned the page.

Report collected by verbal witness account of Diluc Ragnvindr, supplemented by written reports of Diluc Ragnvindr and Kaeya Ragnvindr.

During the course of the interview, details were difficult to ascertain and were later confirmed in written reports, and will be cited.

-

Incident began late afternoon on April 30 ^th , after Diluc Ragnvindr’s Birthday celebration at the Angel’s Share. On duty, Diluc escorted Crepus Ragnvindr from the City of Mondstadt to the Dawn Winery. [Possibility of intoxication on duty considered, but investigation procured witness reports asserting that he did not imbibe.]

During the course of the journey, witness reports attest that Ursa the Drake attacked the caravan. One Knight was dispatched to ride to Mondstadt to retrieve backup.

Diluc Ragnvindr and other Knights took to arms to battle the drake back, but Diluc suffered a significant injury and was unable to fight.

Details at this point are vague and inconsistent, but reports state that Crepus Ragnvindr produced a gem-adorned glove and donned it, summoning Chains surrounded in black flames, and successfully managed to drive the Drake back. [Account corroborated by Diluc Ragnvindr, Kaeya Ragnvindr, and other knights.]

At this point, it is reported that the energy from the crystal began to react. Exact details are unavailable, but the closest account that could be acquired is that the energy from the crystal ‘backfired’ and began to eat away at his physical form.[Cited from Diluc Ragnvindr’s report, page 3 line 32]

At this point Diluc Ragnvindr became unable to explain in word or writing the details of what happened next, but witness reports and Kaeya Ragnvindr’s written report sheds light on the following events:

Crepus Ragnvindr began to suffer the effects of the artifact and Diluc, understanding that what was happening was likely something completely irreversible both of body and soul, made the decision to end Crepus Ragnvindr’s life with his own hands before the corruption of the gem could-

Diluc slammed his fists on the table and ripped his glasses off, dropping them haphazardly to the wooden surface as he shoved his face in his hands.

No. No no no no no.

He felt unwell, the room was spinning, he-

He lurched forward and found a garbage basket, and was promptly sick in it. His body shook violently as he clung to the bin, too distressed to even begin to feel guilty for whomever would have to clean it up.

He had no memory of the event. He had no idea the full extent of his Father’s death.

He now understood why Kaeya was so desperate to keep it from him.

He should have trusted Kaeya.

Slowly Diluc regained some semblance of wit, picking himself up and using his handkerchief to wipe at his face before fixing his clothes. Only once he looked presentable did he quietly tuck the waste basket out of immediate sight and neatly stack the files back in place.

He left the records room and gave the keeper a faint nod, hoping he wasn’t so pale that he drew unwanted concern.

He made his way into the lobby, feeling disoriented. He was so desperate to reclaim some semblance of memory, and now he felt lost. He didn’t know what to do…

He found himself scaling the stairs, making his way to his- no, Kaeya’s- office.

A few sharp knocks and he heard his brother’s voice call him to enter, and with the faintest of squeak of the hinges, he opened the door and closed it behind him. Kaeya sat at the desk, a small stack of paperwork before him as the man looked up to his guest.

“Well, find anything interesting?” Kaeya asked. His voice sounded like he was teasing, but a moment later Diluc could see the look of concern on his face; he should have known Kaeya would pick up on his distress immediately. A few moments of silence and Kaeya spoke again. “Did you remember something?”

It was Diluc’s turn to deflect, moving slowly to the couch nestled by the window and sinking into it. “Something like that.” He said, turning his gaze to look out at the city.

He could hear Kaeya moving, and then felt a weight sit beside him. Turning to look, he could see Kaeya holding out a cup of coffee, which he accepted gratefully. His stomach was still upset, but the smell of the coffee helped slightly.

Kaeya’s curiosity was evident in his gaze, but the man said nothing to try to learn more. They simply sat beside one another in silence, only the sound of the ticking clock keeping them company.

After what felt like an eternity, Diluc sat the half-finished cup of coffee on the nearby table and stood, turning to face his brother. In response, Kaeya stood as well, his look of confused concern still on his face.

Kaeya opened his mouth to speak, but immediately shut it again as Diluc reached out and latched on tightly. He couldn’t police the shaking of his body anymore, burying his face in his brother’s chest as though his embrace could chase away the horror he learned in that dark records room.

Again he felt Kaeya hesitate, but slowly his arms returned the hug, a hand reaching up to pet his hair.

He let himself stay there, and accept the comfort of the last of his family. Crepus died by his own hand, and apparently he very nearly took Kaeya’s too…

Perhaps it was selfish, but he was beginning to hope he would never remember. Not if everything was...

Chapter Text

It had been just over a week since Diluc learned the truth behind his father’s passing, and it had taken him days to recover from it. Kaeya’s support was invaluable; despite the fact that Diluc didn’t admit to the source of his distress, it seemed likely that Kaeya had figured it out on his own.
It was the two week mark of his amnesia, and the revelation of the truth still rested as a painful discord in his head.

To remember or not?

After his traumatic discovery, he had ceased his attempts to find information. Kaeya had been right in trying to hide things, and Diluc had been foolish not to trust him.

He returned to his ‘normal’ life, doing his best to hide his amnesia from the unaware; which meant he needed to return to his duties as the winery master. As it turned out, Elzer took care of a vast majority of the winery’s day-to-day, so he didn’t actually have a lot to do. Despite that, there were a few things that only he could attend to; mostly correspondence from other merchants insisting that they work with him directly, unwilling to speak with a lowly ‘butler’ if they didn’t have to.

He had retired to his study to work through said pile of correspondence. It piled to a notable height on his desk, and demanded his attention as some of it had piled up over the last couple weeks.

It had long since turned dark, the moon obscured by thick clouds that threatened rain. Diluc was forced to work by lamplight, which only served to make him feel even more tired. He couldn’t rest yet, there was quite a bit left to do, and he had decided to just barrel through it and sleep in the next morning, allowing someone else to mail the letters off in his stead.

Kaeya had, still under Jean’s orders, accompanied Diluc to the winery and made himself comfortable with a book downstairs. Despite being under orders, Kaeya’s reluctance had visibly eased after that night, and while still very present, the tension between them was beginning to fade.

The idea of his brother being so close was a comforting one, though he found voicing such a thing seemed to still make Kaeya uncomfortable.

The wind picked up as the pressure system changed, and not long after came the rain. It was gentle at first, a faint tapping against the window to the beat of a song he could not hear.

Diluc felt his concentration start to waver as the rain began to fall a little harder, and found himself looking over to the window more and more frequently.

The rain picked up, and with it the unpleasant sensation in his chest grew. Diluc forced himself to focus but found his hand beginning to tremble, his handwriting turning quickly into an almost unreadable scrawl.

He felt warm, sweating.

“Maybe some air...” He rasped softly, standing and moving towards the window. Something deep tried to tell him not to, but gloved hands unhooked the latch and pushed the window open. He only cracked it by a couple inches, allowing the cool air rush past his face and, with it, occasional drops of cold rain.

He had assumed that opening the window would ease the stuffiness of the room and make him feel better; and for a few moments it did. The cool air eased a nausea he hadn’t realized he felt, and he breathed just a little easier.

The sound of rain had become more audible, the window no longer muffling the sound. Suddenly his ease vanished, and he found his breath seize tightly in his throat like an impact that made him stagger. He couldn’t breathe, and his attempts came out more like a pitiful wheeze. His hands went to his chest and throat as though choking, panic welling.

Desperately he looked through the window, and gazed out into the rain with wide blown eyes as his head began to swim.

Adrenaline bolted through him as he stared down a massive beast he didn’t immediately recognize; and yet he knew it intimately. The beast reared and let out an ear splitting roar as its eyes glowed dangerously through the glass.

Diluc stumbled back violently, ramming his hip painfully into his desk with enough force that it screeched loudly on the wooden floors as it was shoved back almost two feet.

Pain blossoming and his balance gone, Diluc reached out to steady himself on the nearest surface, only for his hand to land on a stack of paper that slid under his weight, which sent him toppling to the floor with another loud thump.

He felt dazed, unaware of how he found himself on the floor. His limbs felt weak despite his head screaming for him to get up and fight. His vision was blurred by tears that landed on the lenses of his glasses, dripping from the edge of the frames and onto his neck, sending a cold chill that made it even harder to breathe. He tried to force air into his lungs, gasping desperately as his head swam.

Multiple attempts to get to his feet were met with floundering failure, and he only vaguely registered the sound of his door being unlocked and opened. Pounding footsteps reached his ears, and suddenly he felt warm and firm hands grasp his shoulders.

He could recognize the blue and white of his brother, though the details of his form were lost. Instantly Diluc latched onto Kaeya’s coat, shivering violently as he tried to form words. Instead he could only manage to let out a choked noise as he struggled for breath.

“-luc.” He struggled to hear. “Diluc, listen to me, you need to calm down.” Kaeya’s voice sounded muffled in his ears, as though under water. He made himself anchor to it, and slowly it became more clear.

He could hear the slam of the window being closed, followed quickly by the familiar sound of the curtains being drawn. He felt the hands on him roll him to sit properly, leaning against the arm and shoulder that held him steady.

“Breathe slowly. Come on, now.” Kaeya said, his tone soothing. Diluc tried to listen. His breaths came out shuddering, and he fought the urge to gasp as he tried to measure the rise and fall of his chest. Slowly air came more easily, his more measured breaths allowing his seizing muscles to relax and his head begin to clear. Despite that his shaking refused to abate, nor did the terrifying sensation that latched itself onto his soul let go of him.

Those familiar warm hands helped him to his feet, an additional pair joining the first to support his weight as they moved him onto his chair.

“Diluc, what happened?” Kaeya asked softly.

Diluc tried to look up to his brother, but found himself unable to see through the tear soaked lenses, and reached up to yank his glasses off, allowing them to clatter carelessly to the floor. With clearer vision, he looked once more to Kaeya’s face, and could see the deep concern etched into his expression.

Diluc opened his mouth to talk, yet found his throat constricted and refused to let words out. All he could manage was an undignified strangled noise. His unrelenting grip on Kaeya’s jacket tightened unconsciously as he focused on his brother’s proximity, attempting to ground himself and hear the conversation that happened over his head.

“Young Master Kaeya, with all due respect, what the hell is happening?” Adelinde asked in a very nostalgic way, utilizing the tone they only heard when she was well beyond upset. “Do not try to claim otherwise; we can all see the change.”

Kaeya let out a sigh, turning to meet Diluc’s unfocused gaze for a moment. He then looked to the woman who helped raise them. “Lock the door, please.” He said, his tone weary. “It’s very important that this remains a secret.”

Diluc’s knuckles hurt from how tight his grip on Kaeya’s coat was, but couldn’t bring himself to let go. The pain was an anchor-point that allowed him to try to listen to the conversation, even if he couldn’t participate himself.

“It is done. Now, please.”

“Diluc has lost his memory.”

“What?” Her question was wispy, as though the air was punched from her lungs.

“Well, not all of it. Just the last four years. They start a few days before his 18^th birthday.” Kaeya clarified. “He’s been like this for about two weeks now. Top minds at the Knights of Favonius are working on a way to undo it, but it’s slow going.”

“I… see.” Adelinde said, her tone slow as many dots connected all at once. “How did it happen?” She went on to ask.

“We have it on good authority that it’s abyss magic, but the precise ‘how’ is something only Diluc could have told us.” Kaeya said. His tone then went more firm. “Albedo ran some tests and reported that there was a sedative in Diluc’s system; not in dangerous quantities, but definitely in a range where there would be an effect. Do you know anything about this?”

“Ah...” Adelinde hesitated for a moment, but then made her decision. “Yes.” She answered. “Master Diluc has a cup of tea each night, treated with a couple drops of an imported elixir from Liyue’s Bubu Pharmacy.”

“Has he been given any recently?”

“No. We wait for him to request it since he goes to bed immediately after. He has not requested any in… almost two weeks...” Her tone trailed off as another dot connected.

“Please prepare one. Perhaps a little stronger than normal?” Kaeya asked gently, and without a word Adelinde left.

Diluc then felt a gentle hand rest on his shoulder, and Kaeya’s soft voice guided him into leveling his breathing again. He couldn’t tell how long passed, but it only felt like a few seconds before a cup was being pushed into his hands and he was coaxed to drink the whole thing.

His hands still shook badly, and he wound up needing some assistance until it was drained enough the contents wouldn’t spill out the sides.

By the time the cup was empty the shaking had mostly subsided, but in its place was a full body exhaustion that Diluc felt deep in his bones. Adelinde gently took the cup as Kaeya pulled a chair up to sit nearby.

“How do you feel?” He asked.

“...Better.” Diluc finally managed to speak, rubbing his palms.

“Can you tell us what happened?” Kaeya’s voice was gentle and low, as though trying not to startle a particularly skittish deer.

“I… don’t know.” Diluc confessed. “I was at the desk and it started to rain. It felt stuffy so I opened the window, and then I couldn’t breathe...”

Kaeya and Adelinde’s expressions shifted then, but Diluc was too dazed to parse them.

“Go on?”

Diluc’s head hurt. “I saw something. A massive beast I couldn’t recognize, but… I knew it anyway.” He continued. “I stumbled backwards and I don’t remember much after that.” With what little clarity Diluc had, he suspected that it was a locked away memory of Ursa the Drake, but he didn’t tell them that.

Kaeya ran the side of his finger along his chin in thought, eventually sighing in resignation. “I think I have an idea of what might have happened. There’s been a couple of really… nasty things that have happened in rain like this. It probably sparked a memory in the worst way.” He explained.

“Master Diluc would suffer from fits of night terrors...” Adelinde explained. “When it rained, he would become far more irritable. I hadn’t made the connection before, but this eased considerably when he began having that tea.” Under normal circumstances, Adelinde would have never divulged such information, however the situation clearly called for it.

“Diluc, you still there?” Kaeya turned his attention back to his brother.

“Yeah.” Diluc replied, though he sounded even more exhausted than before. His pounding heart had eased and the fear that gripped his throat loosened, though in its place was a fog that settled itself in his head.

“It sounds like this elixir was helping you, so you should resume taking it, okay?” Kaeya said, his tone more of a request. Diluc could only nod. “Good. Now, let’s get you in bed, okay? I suspect your room has some means of muting the sound of the rain.”

Adelinde took point, clearing out staff as discreetly as she could so Kaeya could help Diluc stumble slowly to his personal chambers unseen.

Diluc tried to prepare for bed on his own, but the increased dose of the sedative paired with his episode made him too tired to do more than undo the tie in his hair. Adelinde wound up taking over, assisting him like she did when he was sick.

It wasn’t until he was bundled into bed that he finally noticed that Kaeya had vanished, but was too weary to voice the inquiry, and was asleep before Adelinde had even reached the door.

-

He woke the next day, his head feeling like cotton and memories of the previous night hazy at best. The bed was warm and comfortable, and he was disinclined to climb out. It took the protests of his empty stomach to force himself to get up, shuffling for the vanity mirror on bleary reflex.

He blinked dumbly at his lack of reflection, and needed almost a whole minute to remember that he had covered it.

“Right...” He mumbled, rubbing his face with the heel of his palm. He considered preparing himself for the day, but decided his desire for food took priority. It wouldn’t be the first time he took his disaster bedhead to the dining table.

Without consideration for how it would look to others, Diluc turned the doorknob of his room and found it locked.

Ah, right.

He shuffled to his nightstand and found the key, unlocking the door and turning the knob.

As soon as the latch was undone, the door pushed itself open, swinging back as a weight forced it along.

Diluc took a halfstep back in surprise, and watched as Kaeya spilled onto the floor with a muffled grunt.

“...Did you sleep against my door last night?” Diluc asked, still in mild shock.

Kaeya sat up and rubbed his head where he smacked it on the floor. “Well, the ‘sleeping’ bit wasn’t part of the plan.”

Diluc just stared down at his sibling as he put together the shaky pieces he had of the previous day.

“Why?” He asked, despite suspecting the answer already.

Slowly Kaeya got to his feet, gaze somewhat averted. “I just… Just keeping guard, is all. How do you feel?”

Diluc sighed, perfectly aware of Kaeya’s deflection despite the fuzziness of his head.

“Everything feels a bit muffled.” He admitted. “And I’m hungry.”

“Sounds like an improvement over last night. How much do you remember?”

“It begins to get hazy when I open the window. The more time passes, the fuzzier it gets, like a dream.”

“Lay back down, I’ll have the maids bring you something to eat. It’s probably best you aren’t seen like this right now. I can explain things for you.”

Diluc didn’t need to be told twice and crawled back under his thick blankets, still warm from where he had been sleeping. He laid on his stomach, turning his head to survey the empty room after Kaeya left.

He must have dozed back off, because Diluc snapped back awake at the sound of the bedroom door opening with a creak. Sleepy eyes looked over to see Kaeya walk in with a tray.

“Well come on, then. Sit up.” He instructed, waiting for Diluc to move into a sitting position before putting the tray across his lap.

Pulling up a chair, Kaeya situated himself nearby and began to explain as Diluc ate.

“The simplest explanation is that you had been taking medicine for a while and stopped cold turkey when you lost your memories. It was a sedative that treated what Adelinde called ‘night terrors’. The rain last night likely triggered a memory and you had what I could only describe as a panic attack.” Kaeya explained as he leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. “So at night before you go to bed, remember to ask for a cup of tea from Adelinde. She’s agreed to be a bit more proactive about it just in case you forget; for your sake.”

Diluc nodded, the remaining bits of memory lining up with what he was being told.

“Hopefully this won’t happen again, but we’ll have to take some care when it rains, for now.” Kaeya continued.

Diluc nodded again, and looked up from his breakfast to inspect his brother properly. Kaeya looked haggard, like he hadn’t slept much the previous night.

“You should rest.” Diluc said. “Thank you for looking out for me, but I’m okay now.”

Kaeya’s brows knit, but the sheer exhaustion in his eyes betrayed any argument he might have made.

“Alright. I’ll use the neighboring guest room.” He gave in and stood, treading quietly to the door. “Take it easy today, okay?”

“Sure.” Diluc replied, watching his brother depart and close the door softly behind him.

Chapter Text

Two weeks turned into four and, before Diluc knew it, a whole month had passed. Thanks to his newfound stability and the absolute absence of Abyss activity, he was allowed to move unsupervised and Kaeya returned to his normal duties.
With Adelinde’s help, Diluc was able to more convincingly pretend to be fine and allowed him to slowly sprinkle in the behaviors he wished to exhibit, which allowed people to gradually acclimate. She was an invaluable asset, and Diluc honestly didn’t know what he would do without her. They wound up having to rope Elzer into the conspiracy out of sheer necessity, though Diluc was quite happy to do so.

Out of everything Diluc needed assistance with thanks to his condition, the most unexpected was the care of his hair. He still struggled to look in his reflection, and every mirror in his private chambers were covered, and hallway mirrors were discreetly relocated.

Because of his aversion to his own reflection, he had come to rely on the maid to help him with his bedhead. It was a task that could be accomplished without a mirror, but it was a very difficult task as his mane liked to stick up in places.

It felt silly, but the memory of seeing his reflection and mistaking it for a stranger was a weight on his heart.

The Him That Wasn’t Him. Diluc felt trapped in another man’s body, despite knowing that it was very much him .

He found himself standing in front of the covered vanity mirror one morning, staring it down like a beast in a standoff. Only the sound of his door being opened drew his gaze over his shoulder.

“Good morning, Adelinde.” Diluc greeted.

“Good morning, Master Diluc.” A pleasant reply. “Are you ready for me to help you with your hair?”

“...I don’t believe so...” Diluc said after a moment of hesitation. “I think I’ll try to do it on my own this morning. I’ll call for you if it doesn’t work out.”

Adelinde clasped her hands and nodded in understanding. “Very well. I will move to prepare breakfast while you get ready for the day.”

“Thank you.”

The door closed with a click, leaving Diluc alone with his monsters.

He turned back to the mirror and took a breath, stepping forward and reaching for the cloth. With a sharp tug it fell, revealing the mirror in its entirety. Immediately Diluc felt his breath hitch, looking at a man that wasn’t him.

Discomfort and distress welled up, but he forced it down. This was him, and he couldn’t make himself younger. He would have to accept it eventually.

He sat down on the plush chair and picked up his brush, beginning the slow process of fixing his hair, forcing himself to not close his eyes or avert his gaze. It was him, even if the face wasn’t quite his own.

His skin crawled the entire time, refusing to abate even as he finished fixing his hair and pulled it back into a high ponytail, tied off with a ribbon.

He took a deep ragged breath and looked back into his reflection.

He stared despite the discomfort, despite the itching he felt at how wrong it was.

“Come on, Diluc.” He spoke to himself softly, rubbing his face in his hands. “It’s you. It’s me. I’m me.”

Another shaky breath and he stood, deciding to just rip off the bandage and see what he could accomplish. Finding a white vest with a gray undershirt and black slacks, he set them nearby and began the process of removing his nightclothes, beginning with his shirt.

He steeled himself and hesitantly looked himself over in the mirror, taking painful time to inspect every swell of muscle and jagged scar.

Some were small, running up and down his arms and sides. Some were uneven or long. Some looked to be puncture, while others seemed to be burns. He traced his fingers over each one, trying to recall their sources.

He came to a stop at what was by far the largest and most terrifying of them all.

His left side bore what could only be described as a massive and borderline leathal looking scar. The skin was thick and uneven, with pits that implied a total loss of tissue at one point. It told a story, one that made him wonder what could have happened for him not only to have received such a wound, but survive.

What had he endured in the last four years for such a wound to have been inflicted? Who stood by his side? Did anyone?

He didn’t know, and was beginning to doubt that he ever would.

He dismissed his thoughts, deciding he had done enough for one morning and focused on dressing.

Presentable, he made his way down the stairs and met Adelinde at the bottom. Immediately an idea struck him.

“Adelinde.” He began, getting her attention. “May I borrow some of your time?”

“Of course, Master Diluc.” She nodded with a smile.

-

Taking his breakfast to his study, the head maid followed him and two settled down comfortably to talk, Adelinde holding a fresh cup of coffee from the pot that had been brought up with them.

“What can I do for you?” She asked, completely at ease.

“I would like you to tell me some things.” Diluc began. “Since you know about my… condition, now.”

A soft nod in reply.

“I’d like you to tell me everything you can about, well, me. Starting from the day Father died.” Diluc made his request. “I need you to be as candid as you can. Please don’t be delicate about this, I need to know everything I can get.”

Adelinde’s hands lowered slightly and she frowned, then nodded again. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. Please. I haven’t remembered a thing this entire time; I think whatever happened before was an outlier.”

“I understand. Very well then.” Adelinde took one more sip of her coffee before setting it on the desk. Sitting up straight, she began.

“The day Master Crepus passed away, you isolated yourself. It took quite a bit of coaxing from the Knights to convince you to give even an oral report. The next day you went to the Headquarters and filled out some written reports, but you returned quickly and isolated again.” She explained. “Later that night, Kaeya came to visit and took you outside to talk about something. I didn’t witness it for myself, but I understand you two had a… horrible fight.”

Diluc listened, a lump growing in his throat.

“It was bad enough that Master Kaeya acquired a Vision. You returned that night, drenched to the bone and shaking in anger. You said not a word, isolating once more. The next morning you left at the crack of dawn to the Headquarters. From there I believe you resigned. You returned to the winery and then simply vanished without a trace. The only reason we didn’t suspect your passing was how meticulously things were arranged and how specific items were missing; as though you packed.”

Diluc nodded, a silent bid for her to continue.

“After that, we know nothing. You were simply gone; until you weren’t. However… when you returned...” A hesitation. “You weren’t the same person. I mean, at your core you were; kind, studious, looking out for the best interests of others. But you held people at more than an arm’s length. You didn’t truly let people in, you closed yourself off and put yourself in a sort of self imposed solitary confinement, rarely going into the city except to man the Angel’s Share; ‘to gather information’, you explained.”

“… What do you know about Kaeya and I’s fight? And our… ‘current’ relationship?”

Adelinde sighed softly. “No one knows the true extent, but it was… terrible. As I said, it was bad enough that Master Kaeya received his Vision, and upon your return to Mondstadt, Master Kaeya hid away in the Headquarters for nearly two weeks.”

A pang of grief and guilt shot through Diluc’s chest, punching the wind from his lungs. Had his return truly done that much harm that Kaeya felt the need to hide away?
“Your dynamic has never been the same.” Adelinde continued to speak. “You don’t talk often, and when you do you seem to always bicker and argue. You actively pushed Master Kaeya away, doing and saying what you needed to do it.”

He knew Adelinde wasn’t lying. He trusted her, which made the revelation all the more nauseating.

“Thank you. That will be all...” Diluc muttered as he rested his head in his hand.

Quietly the maid stood and claimed her cup of coffee. She quietly left the room and allowed Diluc his moment alone.

He didn’t hate his brother. There was no way in hell . There had to be some reason for his behavior, there had to be. There had to be some reason for his cruel treatment, for things to be so bad that Kaeya was scared to be close, even when he begged for his proximity.

Diluc knew he had an appointment at Favonius HQ that day to see Albedo and Lisa, who were still hard at work trying to find him a treatment. As much as he didn’t want to move from his spot, he knew they would send someone to track him down if he didn’t show.

Between that and his desire to see and talk to Kaeya, he resolved to go.

He forced himself to finish his breakfast and delivered the plateware to the kitchen. He accepted a foil wrapped sandwich for later from one of the staff, and departed shortly after.

His trip to Mondstadt was uneventful, with only a single stray hilichurl picking a fight it couldn’t win. He walked through the gates with a polite nod to the guards and began to climb the steps for the plaza.

He stopped and passed a few mora into the hands of a newspaper peddling child, tucking it under his arm to find a bench. He settled down and opened it, having decided to relax a little as he whittled away the time until his appointment.

The paper was fairly mundane, and mostly went over things like recent deals at restaurants and stores. It featured an article on one of Barbara’s performances, and another on a valiant clearing of a nearby Hilichurl camp by the Knights. There was also an interview with some adventurers who had found a large trove of treasure, featuring a picture of a blonde girl with an eyepatch and dressed in purple.

One article stuck out to him, causing a subconscious itch of familiarity when he read the heading:

Darknight Hero Missing In Action!

Who the hell was that, and why did they have such a silly name? Curiosity burned and he read the article. It was short but descriptive, going over a hidden vigilante that guarded the city, capturing criminals and defending the walls from dangers that dared enter.

It explained that all sightings and signs of the mysterious man had ended abruptly about a month ago, and following it was a notable uptick in crime and violence.

Diluc’s brows furrowed. A coincidence, surely.

He folded the paper up and tucked it back under his arm as she stood. He had managed to take a couple steps down the road before a blur of red and gold charged into his view, pulling to a stop like a startled deer.

Diluc smiled at the girl in reflex. “Klee, right?” He asked. Upon seeing the awed expression on the girl’s face, his own shifted to puzzlement.

“You must be really happy!” She exclaimed suddenly. “You’re smiling! I’ve never seen you smile before!”

It was a stark change from the nervous child he had met before, as she had suddenly begun to behave much like she had with Kaeya.

A few moments passed as Diluc thought, and realized that perhaps…

The insight of a child tended to be quite valuable.

“It’s about lunch time, would you like to join me?” He invited.

-

After politely discouraging the small child from ordering a sticky honey roast, Klee merrily settled for fisherman’s toast and kicked her feet as she ate. Her table manners were remarkable; though if he recalled correctly she was Albedo’s little sister, so it stood to reason.
“Klee. Would you help me with something?” He asked after a time.
She looked up and he could tell that, despite her mouth being full, he had her full attention.

“I’m… trying to figure myself out.” He began, making an attempt to phrase it in a way a child could understand. “I was hoping you could tell me about… well, me?”

Klee tilted her head curiously.
“I wanted to hear your point of view. I promise I won’t be upset by anything you say.” Diluc continued. “I would be really happy if you were completely honest with me.”

Finishing her mouthful, Klee looked up at Diluc. “Are you sure?” She asked, hesitant. “You won’t be mad about anything Klee has to say?”

“Not at all. You’d be helping me.” Diluc assured.

With a small exhale, she nodded. “Okay. I’ll tell you.”
“Thank you, Klee. Why don’t you start from the beginning?”

“Hm. Okay.” She said, and then took a moment to think. “When you first came home, everyone was super excited. I didn’t know who you were, but everyone seemed so happy!” She began. “It was like you were a prince! I thought you’d be like one, too.”

Diluc listened quietly, filing the information away and nodding for her to keep going.

“You weren’t, though. You weren’t mean or anything, but you never smiled and...” She hesitated. “You seemed really lonely. And really sad. You never smiled, and you were almost always alone.”

Diluc nodded again, painfully aware of how hard Klee was hammering the smiling thing home. “What about Kaeya and I?” He asked.

Klee frowned. “You fought a lot. It was the only time you were really mean.” She said, sounding a little annoyed. “Kaeya always seemed sad afterwards. You were kind of a bully.”

The girl’s expression flattened as it seemed she had only just put a word to it, and was now judging him heavily. Diluc felt guilt bubble, and knew he deserved the ire directed at him.

She seemed to be able to sense his thoughts and, with a small huff, continued. “You’ve been way nicer to him lately though, so I’ll forgive you.”
“… Thank you, I appreciate it.” He said, softly, knowing full well it was Kaeya who would have to be the one to offer forgiveness. “And thank you for talking to me. This was… insightful.”

Klee smiled and finished her toast, her legs kicking once more. “You’re welcome.~”

Diluc sighed softly. “I’m heading to the headquarters soon. Would you like to accompany me?”

Klee looked up in mild surprise, but nodded, seemingly eager.

“Alright. We’ll go when you’re done eating.”

Chapter Text

Klee and Diluc arrived at the Favonius headquarters to little fanfare. His frequent visits to the location had ceased being unusual and thus no longer the subject of curiosity.

Klee charged in ahead, giggling and hefting her bag on her back. “Let’s go! Big brother is probably in his lab!”

Without waiting for so much as a response, the child took off and up the stairs.

With a soft chuckle at her excitement, Diluc climbed the stairs with more respect and caution than the hyper little girl, and made his way towards the lab at a far more leisurely pace.

As he approached the sound of voices fed through the open door. Immediately Diluc identified the voice of his brother, though he didn’t understand exactly what had been said.

He pushed the door open with a small knock on the frame, and stepped inside to see Klee dangling happily from Kaeya’s bicep, swinging and laughing as the Captain just grinned. Kaeya glanced over to the new guest as he kept Klee suspended on his arm.

“Ah, afternoon, Diluc.”

“Good afternoon, Kaeya. Captain Albedo.”

The alchemist turned from his desk and regarded the new arrival. “Ah, good. I was going to send for you had you not shown up soon. I have more experiments I wish to run.”

“I truly pray I will not be subject to this for as many hours as I have been in the past.” Diluc frowned, doing his best not to whine.

“If you wish for me to be swift, I can postpone some of the less important examinations.” Albedo offered, albeit reluctantly.

“Please.”

Albedo nodded with visible disappointment and escorted Diluc towards the device that Diluc has long since become familiar with.

Setting Klee down, Kaeya gave the two men his full attention. “’B- Albedo.” He stuttered, catching himself. “How much longer do you think it’ll be before you find a treatment?”

“It’s hard to say. We must tread cautiously, as the type of Abyss magic that is affecting him has yet to be isolated and, with how tightly it’s wound itself to his mind, we cannot risk doing irreversible harm. We will take as much time as it needs.”

Kaeya frowned deeply, though Diluc was surprised to find himself almost… pleased with the news; not that he let it show on his face.

With a sigh Kaeya rubbed his head and glanced around as he shoved a hand in his pocket. “Well, I’ve been investigating Abyssal order movements this whole time, and I can’t say that they’ve been mobilizing or behaving in any unusual way.”

“Curious. Do you have an idea as to why?” Albedo asked as he fastened the headpiece on Diluc and began turning some dials.

“Well, in their failed ambush they alluded to ‘their fellows efforts not being in vain’, as you know.” Kaeya began to explain as he paced. “I’ve given it some thought, as to why they would do any of this. Clearly whatever they’ve done to Diluc was intentional, and their phrasing implies whatever was intended was not completed; this is supported by their ambush and attempt to, I presume, reclaim Diluc.”

“You sound as though you have come to a conclusion?” Albedo asked, petting Klee’s head as he walked by the baffled looking girl.

“I can’t say for absolutely sure, but I feel like their attempts may have been to brainwash or incapacitate Diluc somehow. Use him as a puppet or perhaps keep a hold of him for some other nefarious purpose.”

Diluc’s skin crawled.

“With their failed ambush, they not only confirmed their involvement, but gave us clues as to the nature of it. If their goal was brainwashing, its failed entirely.”

“We would recognize any altered behavior, and be on the lookout for the possibility now that we know of his condition.” Albedo said, his tone implying he’d come to the conclusion already.

“Precisely. I suspect the lack of strange Abyss activity has more to do with them giving up on their plan than any plots. At least, for now.” Kaeya concluded with a nod.

“That’s almost comforting, I admit.” Diluc said, finally entering the conversation. “I won’t let my guard down, but knowing the odds of being ambushed again are low is nice.”

Albedo only hummed, his focus once more on the machine. The silence pervaded for almost a half hour before Albedo spoke again.

“Master Diluc, correct me if I’m mistaken, but you have experienced no recollections this entire time, yes? He asked.

“Ah… nothing clear.”

“Implying there was something?”

“Sort of…” Diluc hesitated and looked to Kaeya, almost pleadingly. Mercifully, Kaeya seemed to understand.

“Diluc, in response to the rain and a failure to take the sedative you’d detected in his labs, had something almost akin to a flashback, but in a very vague and unhelpful form. All he could say he remembered was a great beast.”

“I see. Likely a stress induced panic attack due to trauma; it stands to reason something like that may linger in the subconscious mind, unaffected.” Albedo nodded again. “Given this, I believe it’s very likely that there will be no natural recovery of memory.”

Kaeya visibly paled a little, setting his jaw.

“What do you mean?” Diluc asked, far less distressed than his sibling.

“Without immensely specific stimuli, it’s doubtful you will ever remember anything; not with how tightly wound the magic is. Perhaps subconscious memories may trigger with the correct set of circumstances, but it’s likely they will be memories related to traumatic or very noteworthy events. Things that would affect your behavior at your core.”

“So you’re saying, short of traumatic flashbacks, he won’t remember anything without treatment?” Kaeya simplified, to which Albedo simply nodded once more. “Fantastic.” The sarcasm in Kaeya’s tone was palpable.

The machine began to wind down with a whir, loud enough to disguise Diluc’s muttered words as he was freed from the contraption and stood.

“Perhaps I would be happier if I never remembered.”

“Pardon?” Albedo turned.

“Nothing. Thank you for your help. I’ll be going now.”

With a nod to the three present, Diluc departed.

-

--

---

Diluc scratched another date on his planner. He lost his memory late July, and it was already September 17 ^st; over a month since his ‘accident’.

The weather had shifted to a sharp chill, a cold front blowing down from Dragonspine thanks to mysterious activities near the summit. With it came almost a foot of snow that had fallen rapidly overnight.

Hardly anything Mondstadt couldn’t handle, and would likely be melted by the next afternoon. Despite that, it did mean people had to break out their jackets and scarves earlier than expected.

For the first time since ‘He’ was there, Diluc was grateful for the black coat the Him That Wasn’t Him wore. Due to his dislike for his current wardrobe, Diluc had begun to take steps to add a bit more color to it. He had contacted the tailor to make him new, less dreary, clothes. He had garbed himself in white and gold that morning, though due to the cold had taken time to consider the worth of wearing the coat. He eventually decided that the black coat wasn’t so out of place as to look garish, and donned it as well before daring to tread out into the snow.

As had become routine, Diluc ventured to the city of Mondstadt to speak with Lisa and Albedo and suffer poking and prodding before being allowed to return home.
He could understand their abundance of caution, and tried to be patient as he really didn’t wish for them to rush and risk another mishap. The sensation of Lisa’s original tug was still fresh in his mind, and he was not eager to relive the experience.

It was two hours before he finally left the headquarters and stepped into the snow, it crunching under his feet. He tread up to the waist high wall and took a moment to look over the frost covered city, a faint smile adorning his lips. Mondstadt in winter was always a delight.

The door behind him creaked open, which prompted Diluc to turn in curiosity, his smile becoming wider as he saw who’d come out.

Dressed somewhat appropriately for once, Kaeya stepped out of the headquarters and paused as he spotted Diluc.

“Ah. Hello.” He’d say with a faint smile of his own.

“Good morning!” Diluc tried to keep himself measured so he didn’t draw attention from the guards. With a tilt of his head, Kaeya beckoned for Diluc to follow as he began to walk.

“On assignment?” Diluc asked as they descended one of many staircases.

“Yes. I need to investigate something in Wolvendom, and then get a statement from one of your workers on the way back.” Kaeya explained.

“So we’re going the same way, then!” The unspoken expectation was there, and with hesitation that couldn’t help but hurt Diluc’s feelings, Kaeya nodded.

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to travel together for a time.” He agreed.

“I could go with you to Wolvendom. I have nothing left to attend to and it wouldn’t hurt to have backup.” Diluc offered, nodding to the guards as they passed the front gates and began to cross the bridge.

“I should be fine on my own, don’t worry yourself.” Kaeya replied, his tone civil but firm.

Diluc frowned, his brows furrowing. Thanks to Adelinde he had more insight as to what had occurred between them in the last four years, but no matter how many olive branches Diluc offered, no matter how much he begged and pleaded, and no matter how much ‘progress’ they made, he just couldn’t seem to get past the wall of ice that his brother had put between them.

He decided not to start a disagreement so early in the morning and let it lie. Silence grew between them as they walked, the snow slowing their progress and muffling every sound, only making the quiet even more eerie.

Despite bearing Pyro, Diluc liked the snow. There was a lot you could do with it; one could make igloos, snowmen, sled down hills, and make snow angels.

Or…

Childish mischief was too irresistible to deny and, out of the eye of anyone else, Diluc allowed himself to indulge.

“Hey, Kaeya!”

Kaeya only managed to turn his head a couple inches before snow exploded on his shoulder, sticking to the fur on his collar.

Kaeya was stunned still, eyes wide in astonishment. Diluc seized that chance to hurl another, which exploded on Kaeya’s hip.

Their gazes met and Diluc gave a cheeky grin; a silent challenge.

And how joyous was the matching glint of mischief that Diluc saw in his dear brother’s eye.

“Oh, it’s on.”

-

In hindsight, picking a snowball fight with a Cryo Allogene was likely a strategic error.
Diluc managed to dodge most of what Kaeya threw at him, darting behind trees and rocks to hear the soft whap of snow striking the surface. He gave as good as he got and threw snowballs with such immense force that they powderized upon impact.

Kaeya had never been one to play fair, though. Diluc shouldn’t have been surprised when Kaeya cheated, making up for the handicap of his affected depth perception by playing dirty.
And by ‘cheated’ Diluc meant ‘hit his brother with an avalanche of freshly conjured powder, which knocked him onto his back and pinned him to the ground’.

Diluc tried to scramble to his feet, shoving snow off himself only to find himself pinned once more as he was tackled by his brother.

Thoroughly defeated, Diluc looked up at the crystal blue diamond of his brother’s eye-

-and began to laugh. A small chuckle at first that turned into a bubbly laugh that took his breath away as he gripped his brother’s arms. He couldn’t even attempt to fight to stand due to how amused he was.

Diluc didn’t notice Kaeya’s expression until he opened his eyes. With a stupid grin still on his face, he saw Kaeya practically gawking down at him.

Then, slowly, a smile found its way onto Kaeya’s face too. He dropped his head as laughter began to escape, rolling off Diluc to lay on the snow beside him as he positively cackled .

Despite the chill that crept through his jacket, Diluc refused to get up. He looked at the genuine smile on his brother’s face with fond familiarity in his chest.

For a moment it felt like before; before he ‘woke up’ in this strange time, before Kaeya put the walls between them…

In that moment he came to realize that, perhaps, surmounting the wall wasn’t impossible.

He sat up and glanced back to Kaeya, who grinned widely back at him.

“I think I won that one.” Kaeya declared.

“I’m not so sure about that.” Diluc replied with a smirk, giving Kaeya only a second to express his confusion before a pile of snow was suddenly dumped on his face.

Laughing almost manically, Diluc scrambled to his feet in a shower of snow and took off down the road as Kaeya sputtered. Quickly Kaeya was on his feet and gave chase.

“Get back here you miscreant !”

Diluc could only laugh more, unable to hear the rush of elemental energy that swept under him. Suddenly the ground was sheet ice, and his laughter cut into a choked noise of surprise as suddenly he lost all traction, his heel slipping and sending him unceremoniously onto his butt.

Stunned, Diluc just groaned as he laid there, squinting up at Kaeya as he walked up and loomed over him with a victorious smile.

“As I said. I think I won this one.”

“For now.” Diluc conceded.

-

The rest of the trip to the winery was in a comfortable and companionable silence, filled with the occasional snicker and playful caution as their little war was still fresh in their minds.

Despite the frigid air, it was the warmest Diluc had felt since he woke up outside the domain.

Once they arrived at the winery, Diluc managed to convince Kaeya to invert his plans and take the statement of the winery worker first, which would give his coat and boots some time to dry before heading for wolvendom.

Kaeya didn’t stay long, and remained only just long enough for his clothes to dry. He departed soon after with a word of thanks.

Despite Diluc’s requests, Kaeya still refused to allow him to go along, and eventually Diluc had to give in and accept that his evening would be spent at home.

A book in hand, he would head for the fireplace and settle down on a chair, opening it and allowing time to slip by.

“Pardon the interruption, Master Diluc.” A faint voice spoke, which prompted Diluc to look up from the pages an unknown amount of time later.

“Yes?”

The maid held out a small booklet. “Master Kaeya left this behind.” She explained.

“I’ll bring it to him, thank you.” The maid deposited the small booklet in Diluc’s outstretched hand, giving him a polite bow before she stepped away.

For a moment Diluc considered opening it and peering inside, but…

No. He wouldn’t violate Kaeya’s privacy like that.

He tucked the booklet inside his coat pocket and returned to his reading; it was still early, so he would wait until the sun warmed the city a little more before heading back.

Chapter Text

The sun had begun to set by the time Diluc finally made it to the city, the red glow of incoming twilight casting the last of its warmth. The worst of the snow had already melted, leaving much of the stone paths clear.

He entered the Favonius Headquarters and immediately made for the stairs, scaling the steps as he traveled the familiar halls to Kaeya’s office. He assumed Kaeya had made it back from his assignment already, so it was the most reasonable place to start looking.

His footfalls were completely silent on the carpet, which allowed the quiet of the hallway to prevail as most had already gone home. As he reached his brother’s office he lifted his hand to knock, but stopped short.

He could hear people speaking and, despite knowing it was an awful habit, stood and listened through the slightly ajar door.

“That doesn’t sound like something I would consider to be a problem, Kaeya.” A soft voice; Albedo’s.

“That’s the problem, Bee.” Kaeya’s own voice was strained. “That was the most fun we’ve had together since we were teenagers, but I know for a fact Diluc wouldn’t have consented to that. Every time I let slip old habits, I’m just making things worse for when he remembers.”

“Has he not made it clear that he wouldn’t hold it against you?”

“I know this Diluc means it, 100%, but he can’t speak for his modern self and we both know that.”

Diluc’s brows furrowed, his hands dropping to his sides as his grip on the book tightened, dread setting in.

“I’m trying so hard to keep my distance, and he’s doing everything in his power to get around it. I just… I can’t keep doing this, Bee.” Kaeya’s voice became even worse, cracking at the last syllable. “This juggling act of keeping both of them happy. I can’t bear the thought of Diluc’s wrath once he remembers and sees how I took advantage of him, but I can’t bear to see the sadness in his expression either.”

“We both know you aren’t taking advantage of him.” Albedo argued.

“Then why does it feel like I’m betraying what little trust there may be?” Kaeya said, sounding defeated. “He’s going to remember and things are going to blow up, and then it’ll go back to how it used to be, but probably worse. As much as I would give anything to be able to reclaim what we had back then, I can’t.”

Albedo sighed softly. “You’re too stuck in your own head. For someone so smart, you can be awfully dumb.”

Diluc turned away and fled quickly,; he couldn’t stand listening any further.

He would return the book tomorrow.

-

Sleep was restless and the morning came too early, but Diluc hauled himself out of bed and brushed his hair, forcing himself to look himself in the mirror as he did.

He’d made up his mind.

For the sake of speed, Diluc borrowed one of the labor horses that knew how to take a rider and set off for the city at a comfortable trot. In significantly less time than it would have taken on foot, he left his mount at the gates and scaled the steps two at a time. His body vibrated with anxiety and excitement as he made his way to the headquarters.

The doors had only just swung closed behind him when he spotted one of the people he was looking for.

“Jean-”                  “-Diluc!”

Both he and Jean spoke at the same time, the Acting Grand Master stepping in close with the cheeriest expression he’d seen since he’d ‘woken’.

“Diluc, come with me!” Taking his hand without another word, she practically dragged him up the stairs and directly to Albedo’s lab. He stumbled a little as he was released, glancing back to watch Jean close and latch the door.

He turned to look over the room, seeing Lisa, Albedo, and Kaeya inside.

“Kaeya, here.” Diluc said softly, passing the booklet over.

“Ah, I’d wondered where that had gotten off to. Thanks.” Kaeya said, seeming perfectly normal, any sign of the previous night’s breakdown entirely gone.

“You’re welcome. Now, what’s this about?” Diluc looked at the others for an answer.

“Well, we’ve finally figured out a treatment for you!” Lisa announced gleefully.

“Over the last few months, I have been running simulations using the brain scan data I had acquired from the machine, tracking how they differed from normal activity to track down how it’s affecting you. Working with Lisa, we were able to-”

“I refuse.”

The room fell into complete and utter silence, no one so much as breathing as they all looked at the amnesiac.

“I refuse.” Diluc repeated, firmly. “Thank you for all of your efforts to help me. I appreciate it more than you know, but I refuse.”

“...Why?” Jean asked breathlessly, sounding absolutely stricken.

Diluc grit his teeth, determined to stick to his decision and looked over everyone in attendance. Albedo looked genuinely surprise for the first time, with a lifted eyebrow indicating his curiosity. Jean looked positively distressed, while Lisa simply looked shocked.

Kaeya looked torn, like he couldn’t decide how he felt in the wake of this announcement.

“Because I don’t want to remember. The way people reacted to me when I first lost my memory, how so much as smiling was a thing of note. How even a child like Klee thought I was nothing but piss and vinegar; a bully . How miserable must I have been, to shun the people I care about?” Diluc balled his fists, only his gloves protecting his palms from his nails. “All of the research I’ve done, everything I’ve learned. It’s horrible, it’s traumatic. I know exactly how Father died, I know about Ursa, I know about Eroch and why I left the Knights. I know I left for three years, and was left with this body that is covered in so many scars it’s a wonder how I survived some of them.”

The room was still, no one able to articulate a thought.

“I don’t want to remember. I’m happy, I’ve adapted to my ‘condition’. Like Kaeya said, I don’t want my happiness to be crushed by the truth. So I’ll simply choose to leave it in the past and move on.” Diluc then looked at his brother, offering his a soft and reassuring smile. “You don’t have anything to worry about, Kae. I promise. I’m going to continue as I am, and be happier for it. Thank you all again, I’ll try to make it up to you.”

With a polite nod, Diluc turned and left, closing the door behind him with a click of finality.

Slowly he descended the stairs, reflecting on his decision. He knew the others would likely protest, and an argument could be made that he was simply sticking his head in the sand, but…

Well, he didn’t care. He made the decision that was best for his own happiness. He thought of his future, no longer weighed down with a sense of nihilism thanks to the overhanging expectation of ‘remembering’.

He was unfettered; it was him, his friends, his family, and the Winery. Perhaps he’d rejoin the Knights, once the others accepted his decision entirely. He’d also have to begin strong-arming Kaeya into accepting the new reality, help him get over his fears.

Chapter Text

Diluc knew people would try to pressure him into accepting the treatment, but he had vastly underestimated the sheer extent of it. He’d anticipated a couple weeks of pestering, but it had persisted for over a month, taking until mid October for them to finally give up and leave it as an open offer.

Finally free of the crushing expectation to remember his past, Diluc thrived and embraced his newfound freedom, living his daily life how he wanted and planning for his future.

Still, he wished to disguise his condition, and to that end resumed some of the habits the Him That Wasn’t Him had engaged in. Thanks to that, Diluc had discovered that not only had his skill in drink mixing not faded with his memory, he actually quite enjoyed doing it despite his distaste for alcohol.

As time went on, even Kaeya had slowly warmed up to the concept of Diluc remaining as he was. Of course Kaeya had protested with the others, at first, though the strength of it was far weaker than the resolve of everyone else.

Hesitantly Kaeya had allowed the wall between them to thaw one drop at a time, like a frightened kitten peering it’s head around the corner, uncertain of what lay just out of sight.

Thanks to that, Diluc found himself in Kaeya’s presence more often, the Captain opting to visit on a more frequent basis. That day he sat at the bar that Diluc was manning in silent companionship, nursing a glass of Death After Noon. Diluc had discreetly watered it down and doctored it in such a way to maintain most of its original flavor. Kaeya had cast his brother a look when it was served, clearly noticing the change, yet opted to say nothing.

Overall it was pleasant. Diluc was able to live his life for himself day by day, embracing what he had left to embrace and looking to the future without the weight that The Him That Wasn’t Him used to bear.

Diluc hummed softly as he picked up the morning newspaper as he leaned on the edge of the bar, skimming over the articles to kill time while he waited for that evening’s customers to trickle in.

Immediately his eyes were drawn to the cover. The last time he had seen an article on the ‘Darknight Hero’, it had been a second page spread; this time it dominated the front page, a blurry Kamera photo of the mysterious cloaked figure dominating at least a third of it.

Like before, the article was concerned over the absence of the vigilante.

Darknight Hero: Dead or Arrested?

It described various theories that could explain the sudden disappearing act, which ranged from murder, to sickness, to arrest, to simple retirement. It also took the time to describe how badly crime had increased as criminals began to notice the absence.

Diluc hated to admit that it seemed like the vigilante was actually a very helpful force in Mond, and idly wondered what had become of them.

At the same time, he felt an itch in the back of his head, like there was something important he needed to do…

“Kaeya?” He called, making the Captain lift his head up from his notebook.

“Yes?”

“Am I forgetting anything?”

Kaeya gave him a look.

“You know what I mean! I’ve taken care of all the paperwork, I’m not missing any meetings, everything is stocked...” Diluc listed to himself. “I feel like I’ve missed something.”

“I’m afraid I couldn’t tell you.” Kaeya shrugged as his eyes went to the paper in curiosity. His expression then shifted as he read the headline, becoming somewhat incomprehensible in his pondering.

Diluc opened his mouth to ask, though in that moment the door to the Angel’s Share swung open. A mysterious blonde figure stepped inside, their garb unlike anything he’d seen before and their eyes a brilliant gold. Following at their shoulder was some sort of floating white and pink pixie, again unlike anything he had ever seen.

Said Pixie’s eyes glinted and she suddenly seemed quite pleased. “Master Diluc! Long time no see!” She said, her companion smiling as they nodded in greeting. “We’re back!”

Diluc stared in confusion, a jolt of anxiety arising as he realized that these people knew him. Thankfully, Kaeya came to the rescue and stood from his seat to intercept the pair.

“What, no greeting for me? I thought we were friends.” He began, teasing. The stranger smiled to them as the pixie chuckled.

“Of course we’re friends! We missed you too!” She said.

“It’s been a very long time since you’ve gone. I admit I was worried something happened to you.” Kaeya said, his tone honest. “How did your visit to Inazuma go? Did you find out anything new?”

With a frown, the stranger shook their head and looked troubled.

“Well, one thing led to another and the Vision Hunt Decree was repealed, among… other things.” The pixie explained, also looking a little harrowed. “Inazuma is very pretty, but it’s also pretty scary. Paimon is happy to be back in Mondstadt; it’s much nicer here.”

The stranger looked to Diluc as ‘Paimon’ and Kaeya spoke, their golden eyes boring into him and making a chill go up his spine.

Shortly after the intense look shifted to concern.

“Are you okay?” They said, their voice soft.

“Ah.” Kaeya made a noise.

Diluc frowned, and realized that he was stuck. There was likely no way he could bluff his way out of this entirely…

“I apologize, but I have no idea who you two are.” He said, hoping they were not so well acquainted that it would be a massive insult.

Based on the twin expressions of grief and confusion, that was not the case.

“What?! We haven’t been gone that long!” Paimon exclaimed. “How rude !”

“Please, don’t be cross with Diluc.” Kaeya came to the rescue again, his own voice low as he checked for listening ears. “It’s not his fault.”

Ire turned into confusion as the pair let Kaeya talk.

“The short version is that he has amnesia.” Kaeya said, making it Diluc’s turn to emit a noise. “Ah, don’t worry, Diluc. I know you can’t remember, but you trusted Paimon and the Traveler immensely. I know it’s okay to tell them the truth.”

“I see...” Diluc sighed, feeling equal parts relieved and guilty. “I do apologize.” He said again, more sincerely this time.

Understanding crossed the Traveler’s face as they nodded.

“How did it happen? Did he whack his head or something?” Paimon asked.

“Abyss magic. The precise ‘how’ is something we don’t know, but we know the Abyss Order was involved.” Kaeya said. “Thankfully, whatever plan they may have had seems to have been abandoned, but it doesn’t seem like Diluc is going to remember on his own. It’s been almost three months now.”

“Oh no…” Paimon looked to Diluc sadly, placing a hand on her chest. Then determination flashed in her eyes, matched by the blonde beside her. “That’s it! We’re gonna find a way to restore your memory!”

“Ah… well, a treatment has been developed...” Kaeya began.

“Oh! That’s wonderful! You’ll be yourself again soon, then!”

Diluc hated having to burst her bubble, with how happy the two strangers seemed.

“I… won’t be doing that.” He said, watching their expressions drop once more into confusion. “I’ve refused the treatment, and decided to continue as I am.”

“But… why would you do that? You-” Paimon began to speak, but Diluc cut her off.

“I’m sorry, I know this may not be what you want to hear, but it’s my decision. I hope we can return to being friends soon.”

The Traveler seemed sad, but nodded in understanding.

“Hey! Now wait a moment!” Paimon began to protest, but the Traveler snatched her out of the air to cover her mouth, which made the tiny pixie flail in protest.

Kaeya turned his focus to the pair, trying to half-heartedly assist Paimon. Diluc took this chance to slip away, ducking into the small tunnel access to the wine cellar for a moment of soluitude. As the hatch closed, silence took over and allowed him a measure of peace.

Diluc leaned against the cool stone and took a moment to center himself, easing the fluttering anxiety in his chest. He felt...really bad. Those who were friends of his? He hadn’t stopped to consider the possibility; with how bad everything seemed to be, he honestly hadn’t thought of the possibility that The Him That Wasn’t Him had actually made any new friends…

He sank into the wall more, resting the back of his head on it as his thoughts vibrated.

A faint grinding sound made him jump and leap back to his feet. He turned to look at the wall the noise had come from in confusion. “Wh-?”

It would be bad if the stones were loose, so he decided it would be best to inspect them and see which part of the wall had made that grinding sound. He began to appraise the wall more thoroughly, using the light of the lantern mounted on the wall nearby to guide him. His hands slid over the stone, and he pushed and tugged along it until he felt his hand sink in deeply.

A dull chunk from deep within the stone was audible, as though a latch had come undone. Another nudge and the wall revealed its secret.

“A passage…?” Diluc mumbled to himself, igniting a flame over his hand to light his path as he stepped inside. The door swung closed behind him as he took in the room, and his eyes landed on a mechanism on the wall nearby; likely his ticket back into the cellar hall. His focus then moved to the small passage he found himself in, and reached up to grasp the head of a torch on the wall and igniting it.

There was a bit of dust, but hardly the amount he would expect for a long abandoned secret passage. It seemed more like the tunnel had seen frequent use up until somewhat recently…

He shook the flame on his hand out and took the torch off the wall, using it to light his path as he followed the hallway. Eventually he came to a stop at a nook carved into the wall, where a table sat tucked neatly inside with a lantern hung over it.

Diluc took a moment to put the lit torch in a sconce, dropping its original occupant carelessly to the floor. He then opened the door of the small lantern, lighting the wick and allowing the additional light to illuminate the tabletop.

The contents of the table seemed mundane at first, but grew in its oddity as he continued to look. First, a bundle of fabric, then he saw a small bag, and then the strangest of all; what looked almost like a mask.

He inspected the articles more closely, starting with the fabric. Gripping it carefully and watching for the cloud of dust that sprung as he opened it, he saw that it was a dark cloak that felt heavy; and familiar. He laid it on the surface of the table, andpulled a glove off to run his bare hand over the surface, immediately recognizing the sensation under his fingertips.

“Pyrospider silk?” He asked himself, staring at the cloak before setting it aside. Under where the cloak had been was a black pair of pants, a shirt, and a belt. They were also made of the same material, resistant to the lick of flames and sturdy.

He moved his focus to the leather bag; it too was high quality and seemed to be able to connect to the belt. It was filled with strange throwing knives, all lethally sharp and vaguely feather-like in design.

Diluc’s head spun with questions. Why it was there? What purpose did it serve? Who put it there? Those and more filled his mind and he had to rub his temples with his fingers as he squinted at the wall.

Eventually he returned to his task and picked up the mask, holding it in both hands as he looked it over. Its design was reminiscent of an owl, and he could tell there was glass over the eye holes. He tapped his fingernail on one experimentally, turning it over in his hands a few times.

He let it rest in his palms as he stared down at it in curiosity.
What if…? No, it was silly. Still, he indulged the childish urge and lifted it slowly to his face, sliding it carefully into place.

He felt his breath stop. If fit perfectly, down to the metal strap that threaded so perfectly through his hair it seemed almost tailor made.

And the glass.

No, it wasn’t glass that covered the eyes of the mask.

It was lenses. Corrective lenses.
And he could see perfectly through them .

Diluc’s hands shot to his mouth as realization set in, stumbling back until his back hit the wall.

“Am I…?”

The timing lined up. The hidden tunnel made sense. The cloak and black clothes indicated it. The Mask and the lenses confirmed it.

“I’m the Darknight Hero?” He asked the darkness.

The newspapers flashed through his mind. The despair of the people, the uptick in crime and danger…

When he forgot, the Darknight hero could no longer do his work. Unless he remembered...

“No.” Diluc said firmly to himself, shutting down that line of thought. “The city doesn’t need a vigilante. It’s up to the Knights to protect the city.”

He dropped the mask onto the table and left it and everything else behind, stalking back to the Angel’s Share.

“I can just join the Knights again and help them out.” He decided. “I’ll do what I can for now.”

His mind made up, he returned to the bar and acted as though nothing changed.

Because it didn’t. Not at all.

Chapter Text

Diluc would have been lying if he said that the whole ‘Darknight Hero’ business didn’t eat at him inside, but was steadfast in his assessment; he would be far more valuable as a Knight.

The only problem was that the Him That Wasn’t Him had a historically negative opinion of the Knights after his return. Re-joining the Knights without taking the appropriate steps would send the city into an absolute frenzy .

No, as much as he hated it, Diluc knew he needed to bide his time on this one. If he wished to continue to hide his condition, he would have to slowly ease people into the idea. He would spend more time around knights, around Kaeya and Jean, and get people used to the idea of him being on good terms with them again. It would take time, though, but if he was clever he could make it happen in about a year.

He felt impatient. Every article on the Darknight Hero made him more and more restless, eager to get out there and do something about it. He had to resist the desire to submit his papers immediately, and tried to bury himself in his work as the head of the family business.

His mind wouldn’t rest, however, and the documents on his desk were were completely ignored in favor of the two little disks that had long since become his go-to fidget toy. He had found them both towards the beginning of his amnesia; one in his pocket and one in his bag. They slotted together, but would not stick, yet glided smoothly in a way that satisfied something primal in Diluc’s brain. He had recognized the marks on the disks matched many that were on his own documents, but attempts to use the decoders had ended up in failure; they were missing a piece and he could not find it.

So, at a dead end, the decoders had turned into the tool of his idle habit, spinning the two disks together to occupy his hands as he stared at whatever desk-work he had going on.

Time passed unimpeded, and soon enough the hour had begun to grow late, the fatigue born of an early morning bit achingly at Diluc’s joints as the sun began to set. Sleep had almost overtaken him in his chair when a light tapping woke him, his eyes snapping open in sudden alarm. He turned to the source of the sound, his gaze resting on the window. His vision still blurry with sleep, he squinted at it as he slowly got to his feet.

With cautious steps he approached, treading up to the curtains and pulling them aside to look.

“What?” A mumbled sound escaped his lips as he saw the falcon sitting on the ledge, pecking at the window.

He knew that behavior; it was a messenger bird. Diluc acted automatically, thinking perhaps it an urgent message from the city or even from Kaeya, and slid the window open easily.

He felt the cool breeze of the evening brush by as he watched the bird carefully step inside, looking up at him with intelligent expectancy.

Diluc reached for the tiny parcel clipped to its leg and delicately began to unfasten it from the harness. As soon as it was securely in Diluc’s hand, the falcon flapped its powerful wings and, careless to the fact it nearly smacked Diluc’s glasses off his nose, took off into the twilight.

Fixing his glasses, Diluc closed the window and pulled the curtains. He then locked the study door, and finally sat down at his desk to open the pouch.

Inside were two things: A paper covered in coded writing, and a small disk.

Immediately Diluc recognized it all, and all but snatched up his makeshift fidget toy and slotted the final disk into it with a satisfying ‘click’.

Finally, with all the pieces together, the decoder became functional.

Diluc turned to the paper, taking his time to ensure he translated the document properly. It was short and succinct.

Windrise. Midnight Tonight.

-Aster

Diluc could only squint at the suspicious message, tapping his fingers on the desk. It could be a trap, but the decoder implied that there was more to it. An ally, perhaps…?

The name ‘Aster’ was familiar, and Diluc spent several minutes chewing on the information until it finally clicked. He dug for his old notebook through his desk, opening it and flipping through the pages until he found what he wanted.

‘Aster’ came up multiple times, all in vague entries like simple conversations or an exchange of something.

Diluc gave it thought, and in the end decided to meet with this stranger. After all, Diluc knew he could defend himself if it came down to it; he had adapted to his new body and larger sword, so mishaps like his encounter with those mages on the road wouldn’t happen again.

-

Nightfall came too slowly, and the chime of midnight came even slower. Despite multiple attempts to nap, Diluc found himself too restless to manage more than an hour in total and eventually settled in for a long wait.

Eventually he deemed it ‘close enough’ and prepared to depart, stepping out of the Winery without ceremony and making his way towards the grand tree. He donned his glasses as soon as he was out of sight, and because of that was able to spot the figure standing by the statue far sooner than he would have otherwise.

With a deep breath, Diluc put his spectacles away and approached.

The figure was, upon closer inspection, visible male. He wore a hood, and stood with a confidence born of ease as he turned to regard Diluc.

“For a moment I wondered if you would even come.” The stranger said, his body language and tone almost friendly; Diluc concluded this man was most likely not an enemy. “What has been going on, Phoenix?”

“Phoenix?” Diluc parroted on reflex, and immediately realized his mistake. He watched ‘Aster’s’ arms drop to his sides in visible confusion.

“… Surely you know your own designation…?” The man said, an additional question in his tone as he lifted his arms to cross them. “Why have you been silent for the last few months? No report or anything. If it wasn’t for my own investigation, we would have thought you were dead.”

Diluc frowned, unsure of how to proceed. The concern in the stranger’s tone seemed sincere; paired with the decoders, the familiar documents, and the constant references in the journal…

He decided to be honest.

“I’m… sorry. I don’t know who you are or what this is about, but...” Diluc tried to think of a way to explain, but eventually had to give up on tact. “I was ambushed by the Abyss order late July, and lost the last four years of my memory.”

Aster seemed taken aback, a choked noise of surprise escaping him. “What?”

“I’m sorry.” Diluc repeated, unsure of what else to say.

“Hm… I suppose this makes sense, in hindsight.” Aster began to muse to himself, pacing slowly as his shoes tapped faintly on the stone. “Your personality visibly shifted around then, which was immediately followed by your lapse of duties. As first we suspected you had been compromised, or were being extorted…”

“What do you mean by ‘duties’?” Diluc asked as many questions began to form.

Aster shook his head. “Right now it’s likely best if I don’t reveal much, but what I can tell you is that you’re a member of a large intelligence network.” He began to explain. “A high ranking member, at that.”

First he learned he was the Darknight Hero, and now he was being presented with the knowledge that he was some bigshot in a secret network? What in the hell had he been up to? “How much have I lost…?” Diluc asked out loud, dizzy.

“Do you know if you’ll get better?” Aster asked, ignoring the question.

“… Not on my own, no.” Diluc said slowly.

“Do you know how to treat it?”

“….Yes. A treatment is available. But...” Diluc grit his teeth and stood by his decision. “I decided not to remember. Those memories were traumatic, and made me someone I don’t want to be. I made the decision to continue my life as I am.”

Aster stood silently for a time, and eventually exhaled slowly. “Quite the selfish decision.” He said, finally. “However, knowing what I do, I can’t say that I blame you.”

Diluc felt the weight of dread ease a little, but in its place a faint sting of guilt.

“You’re valuable to us, Phoenix. Your loss will be a massive blow in more ways than one. We need you.” Aster began to explain. “But you’re useless as you are, and we can’t force you to accept the treatment.”

The dread returned in force, the guilt biting even more viciously, and Diluc felt his feet weld to the floor.

Aster turned and began to walk away. “Good night, Phoenix. We may likely not meet again. I hope things go well for you.”

Diluc couldn’t formulate words, and his gaze slowly dropped to the ground as he tried to sort through everything he had just learned.

How much had he left to flounder? How much had he abandoned?

-

Diluc had no conscious memory of returning to Mondstadt. The winds that picked up in the threat of rain had gone unnoticed by him in his haze, and it was only once it unleashed itself that Diluc returned to reality as cold water fell upon his face.

Diluc looked to the sky in a silent curse. His head was already a scattered mess, he didn’t need traumas he couldn’t remember coming back to make things harder. He dropped his gaze and looked around for something grounding, and noticed that the Cat’s Tail board had been left out.

Knowing the notes and messages would be ruined in the rain, Diluc picked it up and moved it to a safe spot against the building. He had just finished securing it against blowing away in a wayward gust of wind when familiar handwriting caught his eye. Curious, he leaned in and looked at it more carefully.

Even I sometimes reminisce about the carefree and happy days of the past. The warmth of the Knights, my friends, my father... Everything was perfect. But one can never return to the past.

For the sake of the future, I cannot keep on dreaming in memories. Or should I say, someone has to wake up to face the darkness before dawn so that others may continue to dream.

Rationally, I know there are some things that one must let go of, yet emotionally this is much harder to do. Sometimes my heart is agonized by this...

Hope the business goes well. It's a battlefield out there in the liquor business.

Diluc had long since become familiar with his handwriting in this modern day, and there was absolutely no doubt in his mind that the Him That Wasn’t Him wrote this.

Doubt began to spark and crackle in his head, making his legs feel like lead and head spin so violently he couldn’t even try to stand as everything began to feel like static.

For the sake of the future.

Wake up and face the darkness.

Wake up.

Wake up.

Wake up .

“No!” Diluc couldn’t help but shout a hoarse cry as he gripped the board like a lifeline.

He didn’t want this ! He wanted his family, he wanted his happiness! He could protect people as he was! He didn’t need to remember!

But no matter how much he wished to ignore it, he was being forced to learn how much people needed him, but not Him .

No, they needed the Him That Wasn’t Him. They needed Master Diluc. They needed Phoenix. They needed The Darknight Hero .

“No. No. I don’t want this.” He rasped in a tearful noise as he rested his forehead on the board.

He felt trapped.

Trapped between accepting the truth and embracing his duty, or allowing himself to remain happy while doing what he could.

He was caught between personal desire and a loyalty to those who depended on The Him That Wasn’t Him. He sat faced with the impossible choice between truth and happiness.

Diluc looked up and stared at the message as the rain began to fall heavier, the downpour turning all sound into a single rushing noise that drowned out all else. His hand moved on its own as it reached up and grasped the side of the paper. He was seconds from ripping it off, destroying that damn message and everything it represented-

-but he didn’t. He dropped his hand, staring at his palm as he resisted the urge to just be destructive.

Diluc forced his legs to work and instead stood, turning for the city gate before taking off at a full sprint. If the guards said anything as he ran past them, they were silenced by the distance and the rain, which quickly soaked him down to the bone as he ran.

He charged across the bridge and down the road, kicking up mud and grass as he tore through the storm that had his pulse hammering and head swimming.

“Diluc?”

Kaeya’s voice was a hot dagger through Diluc’s muddled thoughts, audible even through the roar of water and enough to send him skidding to a muddy stop.

He turned and looked at his brother and could see concern on Kaeya’s face, shadowed by the rain cloak that rested on his head and shoulders. Diluc knew he likely looked like a fright, but couldn’t bring himself to say anything yet; he simply stared.

“Diluc, are you okay?” Kaeya continued, approaching slowly. “We should get you out of the rain-”

Kaeya’s words were muddled as Diluc battled the decision he was once so sure of. People needed the Other Him, but the Other Him was so cruel to Kaeya; how could he do that to his precious brother?

Kaeya got even closer as Diluc’s mind spun, the Captain’s hand going for his shoulder, only to hesitate at the last moment.

That was enough to push Diluc over the edge.

“Kaeya, tell me the truth.” He demanded, earning a confused look.

“What? Tell you what truth?” Kaeya sounded genuinely baffled, lacking all context to the question.

“Tell me why we fought!” Diluc snapped. “What was so absolutely terrible that I would treat you so horribly?! I need to hear it from you, Kaeya.”

He looked directly into his sibling’s eye, unwavering and assured of his decision.

“I… Thank you, Kaeya, so much. For looking out for me, for my happiness… It means so much and I should have trusted you from the get-go, but...” He hesitated. “I need to know, and I need to hear it from you. Please.”

Kaeya’s expression was stricken, the moon illuminating the exchange despite the pouring rain that only grew heavier. “Why the sudden shift?” He asked softly.

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore.” Diluc replied, strained. “I’m scared . I don’t want to run, but I can’t bring myself to want to remember. Please, just… tell me why? Why are things so horrible between us? I can’t bring myself to be willing to remember without knowing.”

“… I don’t want to tell you.” Kaeya said, almost a whisper.

“Why?”

“Because I don’t think I can bear seeing the hate so fresh in your eyes again.”

Kaeya’s weak confession felt like a physical blow, and immediately Diluc tried to reply only to find his voice trapped in his constricting throat. He struggled to breathe as his chest began to pound almost painfully, his vision going blurry.

He began to see phantoms, blurred overlaps of now and not-now.

Kaeya, in his Knight’s overcoat, layers underneath to ward the cold. The pouring rain plastering his hair to his face. He looked to his own hands and saw Himself. He could see Kaeya speaking but couldn’t hear what he was saying. He saw his perspective move and his sword swing and-

“No, no no no.” Diluc whispered, gripping his head.

“’Luc, come on now.” Kaeya’s voice finally reached his ears and Diluc opened his eyes, not realizing he had closed them, nor realizing that at some point he had hit the ground.

He quickly returned to the moment and looked up at Kaeya, older, who looked down at him with a harrowed expression of painful worry as he held his upper body off the muddy road.

Diluc reached up and gripped his brother’s shirt.

“Kaeya, please . I need to know why. I don’t want things to go back to how they were, but I need to know why .”

Honestly, Diluc wasn’t sure how knowing would change things, but deep in his heart he knew he couldn’t make his decision until he had the truth.

Kaeya’s expression dropped even more, and in that moment Diluc could see his resolve finally crumble. Lifting his head, Kaeya looked up at the pouring sky and smiled weakly. “How cruel.” He mumbled.

Kaeya helped Diluc to his feet, ensuring he was steady before taking a few long steps back. He faced his brother, and stared him down through the distance put between them.

“Are you sure?” He asked.

Diluc nodded.

Chapter Text

Diluc didn’t know what to expect, but that wasn’t it.

“I wasn’t abandoned the way you think I was.” Kaeya had begun to explain. “My father left me here as a spy, to infiltrate your family and to become part of Mondstadt. My duty was to feed Khaenri'ah information when war broke out.”

To call the revelation ‘alarming’ was a massive understatement. Cold shock quickly swirled into heat and flaming anger. Was everything a lie? Were the years they spent together an act? How much of it was true?

Fury and questions tangled until all he could feel was the painful burn in his chest. He itched to grab his sword-

Kaeya’s stance shifted, so minuscule that Diluc almost missed it; defensive.

Kaeya was ready for something, ready to dodge.

Kaeya was ready to be attacked.

The cold of the rain suddenly reached Diluc’s bones, the flame in his heart extinguishing instantly at the realization. In its place shame and regret took over, which left a freezing pit in his stomach.

What was he doing? Why was he willfully ignoring everything else?
The entire situation with his memory, those last few months alone, were filled with evidence of the truth.

The worry in Kaeya’s expression, the walls, the hesitation, the hidden anguish... Kaeya, despite everything, tried to put his brother first. Kaeya had come clean on his own all those years ago, and he had come clean now.

The grief in his eye was real, and Diluc was a fool for having not seen that for so much as an instant.

Diluc’s body moved on its own, charging towards Kaeya. His movements hadn’t telegraphed any sort of attack, so confusion filled Kaeya’s expression as he stumbled back. He couldn’t move fast enough, however, and was quickly wrapped by Diluc’s arms, which clung around his chest and shoulders in a crushing hug.

Diluc buried his face in the soaked fur on Kaeya’s shoulder, and he could feel his brother go ramrod straight under him.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. It’s okay now, Kaeya, I promise.” Diluc said. He spoke rapidly, desperate say what he needed to before Kaeya filled in the blanks incorrectly. “It wasn’t fair of me, you deserved so much better and I failed you. I’m so sorry .”

Kaeya remained absolutely motionless, stunned, and unable to speak.

“You’re my brother, you’ve always been my brother. Your origins don’t matter; it wasn’t your choice; you were just a kid .” Diluc continued to talk as he said everything he should have said then. “I don’t want to lose you; you’re all I have left and I want to fix it. Everything.”

Slowly, Kaeya moved as though his joints were rusted. With notable hesitation his arms, which had been left suspended mid-air in shock, came to return the embrace. Kaeya’s head dropped to his sibling’s shoulder as he squeezed tightly, and from the crook of his neck Diluc felt something warm begin to bloom.

They stood there for an eternity, an unspoken conversation in their embrace as the pouring rain fell from their awareness. Far too soon they pulled away, Kaeya’s expression exhausted and vulnerable.

After a moment Diluc spoke, his voice tight. “I don’t want to remember, Kaeya. I don’t want to hurt you again, and I don’t know if I’ll remember this . But… There is so much I have to do, so many people depending on me that I didn’t have any idea about… “ He hesitated between each sentence, eyes glancing to the ground before looking back up. “I can’t do any of it if I don’t remember… But I don’t want to push you away again, I don’t want to return to such a miserable life, I don’t want to remember the blood on my hands.”

Kaeya’s eyes held more understanding than he expected, as though knowing something he hadn’t let on.

“Kaeya, you’re my brother and I love you. If I don’t remember this, please remember that , no matter how I may act.” Diluc begged, watching his brother’s expression shift to pain before he nodded softly. “I don’t want to remember. But I have to.”

“...I understand. We can go to the Headquarters in the morning, for now we should get out of the rain.” Kaeya’s voice was soft, tired. Diluc felt the same and agreed silently, and followed behind Kaeya as he was escorted back to the city.

The walk to Kaeya’s home was slow, and the welcome warmth of the inside was welcome and brought attention to how bone cold Diluc felt.

“Can I borrow something to wear?” He asked, inspecting his soaked clothes. His Jacket had warded some of it, but not enough to keep on.

“I’ll see if I can find something that will fit those broad shoulders of yours.” Kaeya said as he lit the fireplace. He pulled his own coat off and hung it nearby before he climbed the stairs to see what he could find.

Diluc followed Kaeya’s example and shed his outer layers to hang near the fire to dry overnight. He had to lean against the wall to remove his boots, which had managed to keep his feet dry at the very least.

Kaeya returned wearing dry and plain sleep-clothes, and handed over a large cotton shirt and a pair of drawstring pants. “These should fit.” He said.

“Thank you.” Diluc accepted the clothes and ducked into the bathroom to change, returning later to hang the rest of his clothes by the fire alongside Kaeya’s own.

Wordlessly the pair settled on the couch, one seated on either side facing the other, their legs slightly entangled. Neither spoke for a long time.

Diluc’s throat felt tight and he gripped his sleeves as he had to force the words out. “I’m scared, Kae.” He said weakly.

Kaeya’s head snapped up. “I...” Words seemed to fail him as concern and confusion mixed in his face.

“I’m scared I won’t remember any of this. That ‘I’ will disappear entirely.” Diluc clarified. “That maybe the treatment won’t work and all the things I need to d o will remain undone. That the Me That Isn’t Me- ...No. That I won’t allow us to fix things in my rage. I’m scared of the future.” He had to keep the tears out of his voice, fighting them back. “I’m scared of myself. ”

“...’Luc, it’s...” Kaeya began, then stopped, then resumed. “I can’t say any of those will come to pass, I can’t say they won’t. But what I can tell you is that… no matter what happens, I’ll support you.”

Diluc nodded weakly, and then spoke.

“I know it’s childish, but… can we share a bed tonight?” His request earned a slightly lifted eyebrow from Kaeya. After a few moments his expression softened and he nodded.

“It’s not that childish, given the circumstances. And even if it was, I think you have the right to indulge a little bit in that...” Kaeya said as he stood. “It’s late, we should try to get what sleep we can.”

Diluc climbed to his feet and followed after him. Kaeya lit a table lamp when they arrived, and Diluc watched as Kaeya moved about the room to check the window and draw the curtains. He gently nudged Diluc aside to secure the door, and only then did he allow himself to move to the bed.

Diluc crawled on across from him and laid on his side, facing the wall. He felt Kaeya do the same and press his back to his own. Pulling the blanket up, the pair settled in for rest as Kaeya snuffed the light.

“Good night, Kaeya.”

“… Good night, Diluc.”

-

Morning came without consent, but despite the anxiety that gnawed away at his stomach and turned him from breakfast, Diluc found himself the most rested he had been in a while. Kaeya’s proximity through the night had been comforting, lulling him back to sleep each time he slipped back into reality.

The one thing neither of them had expected to have to deal with was how absolutely wrecked Diluc’s hair was.

Between being soaked with rainwater and Diluc going to bed without so much as looking at a comb, his hair could only be described as fucked .

Kaeya had experience wrangling his mane, thankfully, and so Diluc sat on a stool and stared out the window as his brother engaged in his battle of tangles. It was domestic and comforting; an unspoken expression of affection that Kaeya was willing to proactively offer to do such a thing, and how gentle his hands were as he avoided pulling and yanking.

It took nearly an hour before the brush could finally run through the strands without snagging, though Diluc would most certainly have to treat it that evening to keep it from tangling back up again.

His hair fixed, he pulled it up into a high tail and out of his face as Kaeya got dressed. Diluc did as well, and took his time in a childish attempt to prolong the inevitable.

He hated it, but eventually the time for them to go to the headquarters arrived. With nothing else that they could use to delay further, they grabbed their bags and began to make their way up the steps of the city.

The smell of the previous night’s rain hung pleasantly in the air, a crisp and refreshing scent that accompanied them all the way to their destination. Kaeya took the lead once they reached Jean’s office, and explained a simplified variation of events that suited their need. Diluc stayed in his own thoughts as they spoke, his eyes not lingering on anything for long.

“Wait, really?” Jean asked as the papers in her hand slipped from her grip. “I mean- that’s great!” She got to her feet and cast a glance to the anxious looking amnesiac. She knew him enough to see his anxiety, and offered him a reassuring smile. “I’ll go find Lisa and Albedo, would you wait here?”

“Of course.”

Like a whirlwind, Jean was out the door and hurried across the hall to the library, leaving the brothers alone for a time.

“How are you feeling?” Kaeya asked.

“Like I’m going to vomit.” Diluc answered, hearing Kaeya choke back a laugh. “Not funny.”

“I know, I’m sorry. Just… I get it. I’m nervous too. I trust them to do it right; I have no doubt you’ll be just fine. But… well, I’ve never been one to look towards the future with much hope, even when I try.”

“… I hope I’m not cruel to you when I wake.”

“I won’t hold it against you if you are.”

“You should. You should yell at me for being so dumb. I deserve it.”

“I’m not sure how that would go, but it’s tempting.”

The pair managed to exchange a small chuckle just before Lisa appeared with a smile.

“Welcome back. I hear you’ve agreed to the treatment?” She asked, to which Diluc only nodded. “Very good. I’m just going to check a few things while we wait for our lovely Chief Alchemist.”

With far more care than before, Lisa summoned wisps of magic and laced it around Diluc’s head, her brows furrowed in concentration. She worked slowly, well into the point in which Jean and Albedo arrived, a few apparatus and a folding cot in tow.

Once Lisa finished with him, Albedo took over, fastening a delicate crown over his brow.

“What’s this?”

“A more refined version of the machine I’d been using before. This will assist us in more precisely targeting the abyss magic affecting you.” Albedo explained. “It will also serve to stabilize and absorb it if the unexpected happened, protecting all of us from harm.”

“Brilliant as always.” Kaeya praised, earning a flat look from the Alchemist. A moment later the heat vanished and he continued his explanation.

“Now given we will be effectively battling what is causing your condition, we are going to have to put you to sleep.”

“What?” Diluc’s confusion was audible.

“The original magic, from what we can tell, is exceptionally painful for the conscious mind.” Lisa said. “Typically it’s done to unconscious subjects to prevent cognitive damage.”

“I suspect the Abyss order was trying to break your mind, so it’s likely you were awake when they attempted it. Actually, I feel it’s almost guaranteed given you managed to escape mid-process.” Albedo theorized. “Regardless. We will be sedating you heavily for this. When you wake up, you should be back to normal.”

Normal… Diluc chewed on that word with resentment, but also with understanding. This was for the best for everyone.

Except himself, anyway.

Lisa approached with a cup of tea, the scent wafting up appealingly. She placed it in his hands carefully; it was warm but not so hot that he couldn’t drink it immediately.

“This will put you to sleep. You’ll need to drink it all.” She instructed.

“… Will I remember this? These last few months?” Diluc asked.

“It’s hard to say for sure.” Albedo replied. “It depends on how the magic is latched on and what happens when we remove it.”

Diluc had hoped for more, but that was all he was going to get. With a shallow nod he lifted the cup to his lips and, with a beat of hesitation, drank it down in one go. It hit almost immediately, the room lurching slowly. He felt hands on him, guiding him to sit on the cot gently. Looking up with blurry eyes, Diluc made out the outline of Kaeya as he was laid down.

Fading fast, Diluc held a hand out to him, which Kaeya took.

“I love you, brother. That will never change, I promise.”

Kaeya opened his mouth to reply, but didn’t seem to be able to find the words.

And he didn’t get the chance before Diluc fell asleep, and the world went dark.

Chapter Text

Everything felt fuzzy and weird, as though a weight had been lifted or an uncomfortable strap had finally been removed, but in its place was a bone deep ache that radiated from his head downwards. It wasn’t a good feeling, and he hadn’t felt so poorly since he slammed that glass of Firewater a year ago.

He groaned softly and sat up, looking around as his vision came into focus.

“Diluc, you’re awake.” Jean’s voice was soft as she pushed a glass of water into his hands, which he downed gratefully. He then looked around to take stock of his situation and-

“Why am I in your office?” He asked flatly. Jean’s expression blinked from surprise to fond exasperation.

“Welcome back, Sir.” She replied. “What do you remember?”

Diluc took a moment to think. He remembered getting intel on a domain and going to investigate alone. He remembered the arduous experience getting through it was and how he had been ambushed by Abyss mages, and-

-and suddenly the memories rushed back in, both his own and his other self’s. The last four years and the last few months hit him like a runaway cart. Emotions quarreled violently as he clutched his head and groaned, trying to make sense of reality as two entirely different perspectives duked it out for dominance. “… Everything, I think. The last four years all the way up to losing my memory, and the time between then and now.” He managed to say.

Jean nodded. “That’s good, I admit I wasn’t sure how to explain a months long blank space.”

“… Where is Kaeya?”

Jean hesitated. “He left as soon as the treatment was completed. He didn’t say where he was going.” She answered.

“I see...” Diluc muttered as he slowly got to his feet and adjusted his gloves in a years old habit. He turned to look at Jean, his hard expression easing some. “Thank you, Jean.”

Leaving it at that, Diluc turned and left the office. He stopped in the main hall and tried to figure out where Kaeya may have gone. He decided to try to close places first and climbed the stairs to the man’s office.

The door was unlocked and Diluc walked in, looking inside to find it empty. With that possibility off the list he tried to think of where else Kaeya could be. It was possible he was at the Angel’s Share, but…

An idea struck him then, and he found his feet moving on their own to a familiar pair of solid wood doors. He rapped a gloved knuckle hard on the surface, which echoed down the hallway.

A few seconds passed and the door opened, and bright teal eyes on a flat expression met Diluc’s own. The pair exchanged a silent gaze for a moment before the door opened the rest of the way, an unspoken invitation for entry as the Alchemist walked back to his worktable.

“What do I owe this visit?” Albedo asked, returning most of his focus to vials and bubbling chemicals.

“To thank you, at least that’s part of it.” Diluc began.

“You’re welcome. What else did you need?”

“You’re close to Kaeya.” Not a question.

“… In a sense.” Albedo replied. He then set his work down and turned to face Diluc properly. “Why do you bring it up?”

“Do you know where he is, or have an idea on where he might go? He’s not in his office.” Diluc kept his tone civil, and watched as Albedo’s expression remained fixed.

“Why do you want to know?” A challenge and a question.

“Because I want to talk to him.”

“Talk to him or ‘talk’ to him?” Albedo’s tone shifted ever so slightly and gained an almost defensive tinge. Diluc realized then that Albedo likely had the information he wanted, and could only sigh.

“I don’t plan on hurting him or starting a fight, I promise...”

Albedo stared him down appraisingly as he crossed his arms, visibly trying to make a decision.

“I remember everything. Everything . And I...” A hesitation. “I heard you two talking, the night before I rejected the treatment.”

That managed to get a response, making Albedo look briefly surprised.

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop; I’d come to bring Kaeya’s notebook back to him and I heard you talking. How scared he was about the repercussions of my remembering, and his worries of ‘taking advantage’ of me.” Diluc explained. “I promise you, I’m not mad at him… Quite the opposite, really.”

Albedo’s eyes closed and the alchemist took almost a full minute to reply.

“Very well. He said he was going to Springvale. That is all I know.” He finally said.

“Thank you, Albedo.” Diluc breathed in relief. “Excuse me, then.”

He turned and managed four steps to the door before halting. He would glance back to see Albedo had not taken his eyes off him.

“...Thank you, not just for helping me, but for being there for Kaeya. It means the world.”

Albedo didn’t reply, but nodded softly.

Diluc left the lab then, and made his way out of the city.

-

The rain had dried entirely by the time Diluc arrived at Springvale, and a few quick inquiries pointed him to a place that, in hindsight, he should have suspected from the get-go.

A cool breeze came from the surface of the lake, which rustled his hair as he mounted the small hill. He looked out at the water and skimmed his gaze around, until he spotted the back of his target sitting by the shore, a lily in his hand.

Diluc walked up, and Kaeya didn’t so much as turn around. “Come to pick a fight?” He asked weakly. “I tried to not overstep while you were amnesiac, I hope you know that. You made it awfully hard, though. Surely you’re not so bull headed as to ignore that.”

Diluc sighed and watched as Kaeya slowly stood and turned to face him, letting the flower dangle in his fingers.

“I hope things can at least remain civil-” Kaeya continued to talk as Diluc crossed his arms and approached. He came to a stop just a couple paces away, and gave the other man a flat look that didn’t waver until he finally stopped talking.

“Um…?” Kaeya looked lost.

With an annoyed huff, Diluc turned his head and spat a small spark of flame to the side.

Kaeya’s eyes went wide in realization, just before he was wrapped up in another far more crushing hug that forced the air from his lungs and the flower from his fingers.

“Shut up already.” Diluc said quietly. “I wasn’t lying before, you know. You were wrong. You are .”

Slowly he let go, allowing Kaeya to breathe and reclaim his footing.

“I never hated you, Kaeya. Not truly. I just made a lot of...really bad choices, one after another, and never really knew how to go back on any of them.” Diluc began to confess. “I got it in my head I couldn’t trust you, that everything about you was with a layer of deceit. I pushed you away because I had it in my head you would only hurt me. But that doesn’t mean I never stopped loving you. You’re my brother.”

Kaeya seemed to lose the ability to talk, listening attentively.

“This incident, so long without memories, has offered me a fresh perspective on everything. It let me see reality without the bitter lens of resentment I’ve forced myself to carry.” Diluc continued. “It has allowed me to see the unclouded truth.”

Diluc then took a deep steadying breath and looked Kaeya in the eye, unwavering.

“I’m sorry.”

“...Is...” Kaeya choked, finding words. “Is this a joke?” A nervous laugh escaped him, clearly in stunned denial at the reality of the situation; Diluc’s heart broke for him, seeing the damage he had caused laid bare.

“It’s not. I promise you it’s not.” Diluc assured, reaching out to take Kaeya’s shoulders. “I should have said this years ago, none of that was your fault. You’re innocent, you didn’t have a choice in any of it. You told me on your own, you weren’t forced to do anything and you told me the truth. I’m the one in the wrong here.”

Slowly Diluc let go and took a half step back, his eyes never leaving his brother as he gave him space. He lifted his hand and offered it. “I would like to… if it’s possible, try to be brothers again. I promise you, I won’t repeat the mistakes of the past.” He hesitated, uncertainty worming its way into his heart. “I hope you can trust me, even after everything I’ve done to you.”

Kaeya looked down to the offered hand, a sad smile finally making its way onto his expression, which shifted to one blessed with sincere happiness. “I never truly stopped, not when push came to shove.” He said as he reached out to accept his brother’s hand, squeezing firmly.

Diluc pulled him into another hug, which Kaeya immediately returned, finally without apprehension.

“I love you, Kaeya. You’re my brother and I’m sorry I ever made you doubt any of that.” Diluc said into the fur of Kaeya’s coat, which still smelled like rain.

“I love you too, ‘Luc. Always have.” Kaeya replied.
They held one another for a few long moments, neither willing to let go. The long and content silence was eventually broken by Kaeya’s quiet voice.
“’Luc, I have a question.” He said.
“What is it?” Diluc lifted his head so he could turn his face towards Kaeya.

“Why do you wear so much black?”

Diluc snorted so hard it sounded like he hurt himself.

Chapter Text

[[BEGIN FROM PAGE 13]]

They go inside the HQ and immediately run into klee

Klee greets them and Kaeya goes big brother mode

Luc watches, marveling on what he's seeing

Klee greets Diluc awkwardly and quickly flees

Diluc asks about her, Kaeya actually explains.

Diluc asks why she seemed so awkward

Kaeya explains that he's a 'weird adult' and leaves it at that

Diluc is annoyed, but at least Kaeya has returned to teasing him at least.

They go to jean's office to find Jean, Lisa, and Albedo.

Jean confesses she confided in Lisa and apologizes

Kaeya says its fine as he feels she can help. He has a new theory on what happened to Diluc

They sit to eat as they compare notes

He explains the mage attack and what they said.

The group connects the dots

Lisa agrees to help, and asks Diluc to sit down so she can poke around.

Luc is hesitant but agrees, allowing her to work.

She spends several minutes before giving her verdict: Abyss magic, no doubt.

She declares that she'll need to do research, and asks Albedo to assist her in developing a treatment.

Albedo concurs that utilizing leyline energy may help, since they can't wield abyss magic themselves.

Lisa and albedo advise Diluc to try to remember anything he can on his own, as it may help weaken the magic affecting him and make their job easier

Kaeya attempts to dump responsibility of Diluc on Lisa and Albedo. Albedo shoots him down hard.

Diluc states he also wants to go with Kaeya, and Jean gives the direct order to look after Diluc.

Kaeya looks betrayed but obeys. The pair leaves, and Kaeya asks what Dulic wishes to do.

Diluc thinks and decides on springvale.

They go there in mostly silence.

Diluc takes them to the lake and kneels by the water to pick a Calla lily

He works up the nerve to confront Kaeya and turns to look at him

He asks why he's been so distant, and demands why Kaeya didn't want to help him. He asks if he's mad at him

Kaeya hesitates before speaking, Luc has to beg him to talk

Kaeya explains that it isn't that he doesn't /want/ to help, and that he isn't mad at him at all.

He explains it's because he knows Diluc doesn't actually want his help.

Diluc is justifiably confused, and claims he /does/ want his help

Kaeya finally admits that they had a falling out, and that Diluc actually hates him.

He explains that he's being distant because he's trying to respect his boundaries while in this state to minimize fallout when he does remember.

He reminds Diluc that he can 'easily be taken advantage of' in this state.

Diluc argues that he could /never/ hate him.

Kaeya frowns, averts his gaze, and says nothing.

Diluc continues to refuse to believe this and asks if it's just some unfunny joke

Kaeya cuts him off and brings up how he asked about his Vision and how he got it.

Luc recalls, and suddenly feels dread

Kaeya, in a bitter tone as though trying to remind Luc of why, states he got it while defending himself from Diluc's attempts to kill him.

Diluc is justifiably distressed again and demands why

Kaeya says it's not important

Luc disagrees, and states that if he won't say why, then he'll just assume he's wrong

Kaeya is 'wtf'

Diluc says he believes in Kaeya, and that nothing could make him hate him like he believes

Diluc approaches and grabs Kaeya's arm, smiling to him

"I trust you, but you're wrong." He says, insisting he wants Kaeya by his side.

Kaeya yanks free and says he needs a moment, walking away

Diluc watches Kaeya pace at a distance, worried

Eventually Kaeya returns, and states that he'll do what he's asked, but he isn't allowed to be pissed when he's back to normal.

Diluc frowns and says that if remembering would truely be so damaging, that maybe he would rather not reclaim his memories.

Kaeya says nothing at that.

Diluc brings up the memory of their promise as kids, the pinky loop, and swears that he meant it.

Diluc hesitates, and says that it's pretty obvious, based on Kaeya's constant refusal to divulge much of anything, that things were pretty bad.

Kaeya admits that everything he knows isn't great. If anything good happened, he isn't privvy to it.

Diluc says he wants to know, so he could make an educated decision on if he wants to remember.

KAeya reminds him that there is an entirely unaccounted for 3 year window.

Diluc says he'll consider that
****
Eventually they return to Mond and to the HQ. Lisa is still doing research and says it'll take time. Albedo tries to pull Diluc aside for some experiments.

In Albedo's lab, Kaeya explains that he feels it's best that they continue to hide his condition, so staying the night at the HQ would raise eyebrows.

Luc asks why, KAeya deflects

Once Albedo's experiments are done, they leave and go to Kaeya's house. Kaeya goes to set up the guest room

Diluc pokes around and looks over knick knacks, photos, and paintings, examining the proof of Kaeya's life without him.

Kaeya returns and Diluc decides to ask directly. "I'm not in the knights anymore, am I?"

Kaeya inquires as to why he asks.

Diluc explains the evidence; the lack of badge, the rank change, his own un-knightly impluses, the fact everyone calls him 'Master' Diluc.

Kaeya gives in and tells the truth, that he resigned after Crepus dies.

Diluc asks why and Kaeya hesitates, and only speaks after Diluc begs

He explains Eroch and how he handled Crepus's death that pushed him over the edge

Diluc is missing a lot of context, and doens't understand.

He asks if Kaeya would explain how Crepus died.

Kaeya says he doesn't want to tell him; to spare him the pain of that day.

Diluc asks if it was why they fought.

"Not entirely. It happened the same day, though." Kaeya replies

Diluc asks to know more

Kaeya sighs and admits that he really wants Diluc to be able to hold onto what happiness he has right now, just for a little while longer, before crushing it with the truth.

Kaeya excuses himself to bed.

Diluc considers his options and decides to find some of his own answers.

He goes to the guest room and lingers, waiting until he's certain Kaeya is asleep

He leaves and heads to the winery [chapter cut?]

[[OUTLINE DIVERGENCE FROM PAGE 20]]

Diluc travels alone from the city to the Winery, mercifully unmolested. He is greeted by the staff and briefly considers speaking with Elzer or Adelinde before deciding to wait.

He goes up to his study and sits down to begin rifling through things.

He starts with his satchel, removing everything and going through them all, setting the disk on the table.

The contents of the satchel are mostly mundane, but there is a journal inside that garners his attention

Briefly copying the writing inside, he confirms it's his own handwriting and begins to read.

It's a simplied journal, describing his day to day life, though inside are tucked notes and recipts. Among the journal are references to code names he didn't recognize.

Some of the notes also include pages with writing he can't decipher.

Frustrated he would move on to something else, looking over the disk again

It's familiar and he can't place how, and sighs in minor frustration, rubbing at his eyes. His head was hurting looking through all the papers, and he didn't know why.

He'd force himself to relax his face and shoulders, finding some minor relief.

He would then begin digging through the drawers, starting with the upper right one.

Immediately he spots a leather case, and opens it to find a thin pair of glasses. He found them to be quite pretty, and on childish impulse tries them on

Only to discover that he can see things /far/ more clearly than he could a moment ago

A few moments of pulling it on and off, he makes the realization that apparently his eyesight is pretty terrible.

He keeps the glasses on and resumes going over documents, finding himself having a much easier time of it now he wasn't squinting.

He goes at it for hours, reading old newspapers, journals, letters, and anything he could get his hands on to spark his memory or give him a hint at his past.

There was nothing in the office, at the very least. He removes his glasses and decides to rest his head for a moment, laying down on the desk with his head in his arms

Cut to next morning, Kaeya tapping his head.

Kaeya half sasses and calls him out on vanishing

Diluc sits up with a yawn, putting the glasses back on.

Kaeya is 'wt actual f'

Diluc asks whats wrong

Kaeya confesses he'd never seen Diluc wear glasses. /Ever/

Diluc finds this strange, and remarks that his vision isn't the best.

Kaeya snorts a laugh and half jokes that maybe that's why he's always scowling; he's /squinting/

Not thrilled with the idea, but unable to deny it, Diluc changes the topic and asks why he's there

Kaeya explains that he suspected this was where he went when he woke up to find him gone, and came straight here; clearly he was correct.

Diluc states that he's allowed to do what he wants, and doesn't need a keeper

Kaeya sighs and agrees, but then asks why he asked for him to stay at his side if he was just going to skulk around like this

Diluc has no answer and just packs his satchel

Diluc thanks Kaeya for looking out for him, but declares that he wants some time alone. Since Kaeya is refusing to answer questions, perhaps going over things on his own may help

Kaeya reminds Diluc of his concern of biased memories based on partial context

Diluc argues that it's his own concern.

Kaeya sighs and gives in. He explains he's under orders right now to look after him, so he'll give him some space, but he's obligated to stay at least somewhat nearby.

Diluc frowns but accepts that at least for now

Diluc prepares to go with the glasses on his nose, and Kaeya brings it up

Diluc mentions it's nice to be able to see, Kaeya counters with the fact that no one has ever seen him with them before.

Diluc is unhappy, and half-concedes. He puts them in the case and takes them with him, at the very least.

The pair return to the city, at which point Diluc strikes out on his own.

Kaeya reports he'll be at the headquarters if he's needed, and to be careful.

Diluc goes to the angel's share and is greeted by Charles, who asks if he plans on manning the bar

Diluc stumbles and declines after some thought, excusing himself to the upstairs loft.

He takes some time to think and to snoop, finding only finance records for the bar, as well as tabs and ledgers

He finds records of Kaeya's, and notes the almost excessive amount of drinking. [Yikes]

That's worrying. He puts it back and snoops more, eventually leaving and trying to think of where else to investigate.

Eventually he decides to go to the Headquarters and investigate Crepus' death.

Kaeya told him Eroch was involved, so it was possible looking into that would offer him something.
***
He finds the records keeper and asks to see Eroch's file. He gets some resistance, but Diluc manages to convince him given the close involvement with his father's passing[this was a bluff but it worked]

Reluctantly he'll be allowed into the records room and be provided the files.

Diluc asks that they not mention this to anyone, and the keeper agrees.

Diluc is left alone in the records room and he dons his glasses and begins to read

He starts with the files on Eroch, learning of his ousting and how Jean got her Vision, and how Kaeya helped.

He learns about how own resignation and prompt disappearance

He goes back until he finds the incident report for That Day

It's a mix of formal reports from himself, Kaeya, and a few other knights.

The report he submitted was written in very shakey handwriting, and partway it was taken over by the more flowing and familiar script of Jean.

It details the exact happenings that day

Diluc begins to feel sick reading it, and has to stop to retch into a waste paper basket as the full realization hits him

Just /knowing/ he did it was distressing. He didn't want to remember doing it; at all.

He packs up and tries to make himself look presentable, removing and stowing away the glasses before leaving.

He gives a shakey thanks to the keeper and meanders into the HQ lobby, feeling lost as to what to do.

He eventually finds his way to his old office; KAeya's now, and knocks

Kaeya bids him enter and he's sitting at the desk with a pile of paperwork

Kaeya half teases, but eases up as he sees Diluc is distressed.

He hesitates but asks, inquires if he remembered something

Diluc's turn to deflect! "Something like that"

He sits on the couch by the window and looks out it

A few moments later Kaeya is at his side with a cup of coffee, which is accepted gratefully.

They sit in silence for a time, Kaeya not pushing, but clearly curious.

Time passes with only the sound of the ticking clock

Eventually Diluc stands and moves to stand beside Kaeya, wordless

Curious and concerned, Kaeya stands as well

Before he can say anything, Diluc reaches out and latches on, clinging tightly and shaking

Kaeya hesitates, stunned

Slowly he hugs him back, reaching up to pet his hair [Chapter cut?]

-
Reference that days pass and Diluc remembers nothing, and begins trying to resume his normal life

Diluc is at the winery trying to do his job as the Winery Master, sitting in his study and scribbling away

Mention how Kaeya was downstairs

The weather takes a turn, rain tapping against the window

He becomes unable to focus, his hand trembling and making it hard to write, so he sets down his pen

He stands and moves to the window, opening it slightly to feel the cool wind and to hear the rain better

It becomes harder to breathe[an anxiety attack is settling in now]

He stares out the window and across the winery as the rain comes down, and as it intensifies he begins to feel the room close in on him

He sees flashes of something incoherant but terrifying, and panic begins to seize him properly

He stumbles back in fear from an unseen threat and rams into the desk, shoving it a half foot and making a loud noise

He puts his hand on it for balance but slips on a paper and falls to the ground

He starts to cry without realizing it and is just floundering, hyperventilating

At some point Kaeya comes in with Adelinde and they bundle him up off the floor and into the chair.

Adelinde slams the window closed and pulls the blinds as Kaeya checks Diluc over for injury

Diluc's head is fuzzy and he's confused and terrified

Kaeya tries to comfort him but it's awkward.

Diluc struggles to talk, seeming to go non-verbal for a moment

Adelinde closes the door and asks Kaeya directly what the *fuck* is happening

Kaeya gives in and confesses the truth to her about Diluc's sudden Amnesia

Adelinde realizes some things and nods softly.

Kaeya brings up the sedative Albedo discovered in the tox screen, and asks about it

Adelinde confirms that Diluc had an evening tea every night with a special concotion imported from Liyue.

Kaeya asks more about it

Adelinde explains that he hasn't requested it for numerous days, if he was even at the winery at all

Kaeya asks her to fetch some now for him; she obliges

The teacup is pushed into Diluc's hands and he's made to drink the whole cup

Eventually his shaking subsides and he becomes more inclined to talk, though he's clearly exausted

Kaeya asks what happened

Diluc explains the best he can, and expresses his own confusion

Kaeya makes the connection and reluctantly explains that two nasty things happened in rain like this. He's vague, of course

Adelinde explains that Diluc suffered from fits of night terrors and became particularly irritible when it rained, conditions that eased upon the introduction of the medicine.

Diluc begins to calm down

Kaeya tries to comfort but he struggles

-
FIND A TRANSITION
-

Time passes. Open with Diluc staring infront of his covered mirror

Mention it'd been covered the whole time

Adelinde knocks and comes inside, asks if he's ready to be helped with his hair

Diluc hesitates and tells her he'll try to do it on his own.

She hesitates but nods and goes.

Diluc works up the nerve to take the cloth down, flinching at the face that wasn't his.

He forces himself to look himself in the mirror as he works on his bedhead

Once he finishes he sits there and stares himself down and can't feel better about it

Hesitantly he removes his pajamas and takes a moment to look himself over

He inspects the scars he doesn't recognize, and goes over the one that once nearly killed him

He wonders what he endured the last three years, to leave his body so ragged

He dresses and makes himself presentable before going downstairs

He finds Adelinde and asks her for some of her time

She obliges and they go to the study.

He asks her to tell him what she knows about the last four years, and to be as candid as possible; he wants to know the good and the bad

She explains that he vanished for three years immediately following his father's death and his resignation

She explains that when he returned, he was like a different person. Still kind, but more closed off. He's engaged in an almost self imposed isolation, keeping all at arms length

Diluc asks about his and Kaeya's fight

She doesn't know the details, only that it was quite severe, and things weren't the same between them anymore. Kaeya especially was pushed far away.

He thanks her for her help and lets her go, spends some time with his own thoughts before going to the city

When he arrives he buys a newspaper and goes over it, reads an article on the mysterious absence of the Dark Knight Hero, and it regails some of their accomplishments

He then runs into Klee again and smiles at her

Klee is surprised to see him smile, which is a painful reminder to Diluc

He hesitantly invites her to have lunch with him

They talk, he learns more about Klee's perspective on things

He escorts her back to the HQ since he needed to go there for a check in with Lisa and Albedo

Albedo runs a few more experements with Diluc with Klee and Kaeya present

Kaeya asks how long it will take, since it's nearly been a month

Albedo states that they must be careful, and ensure they don't make things worse. For that they need time.

Kaeya explains he'd been investigating abyss movements, but it seems after their failed ambush, they seem to have given up on whatever their original plan was; or are at least waiting.

Albedo muses, since Diluc's recollections have been minimal if not nonexistant, they he likely will not remember anything on his own; not without significant stimulus.

Diluc mutters that he'd probably be happier if he didn't remember; no one hears it clearly and he brushes it off.

He leaves
-
Timeskip to mid september; they get a light snow that would likely melt by morning.

Diluc is with Kaeya, who was still acting distant despite Diluc's constant pleads otherwise

They're heading to the winery, and on the way Diluc smacks him with a snowball

Kaeya is stunned and gets hit by another

Snowball fight ensues! Kaeya gets into it and absolutely cheats

Eventually Kaeya tackles Diluc and Luc just laughs; he laughs harder than he had in years

This floors Kaeya and he tries to play it off, smiling and helping Diluc up

Diluc assures him that he had fun, and it was a welcome diversion

They arrive at the winery and a while later Kaeya says he needs to go back to HQ

Diluc says goodbye and returns to his work

Hours later He is informed that Kaeya accidentally forgot a booklet of information that he'd probably need

Diluc agrees to take the booklet to the city and heads there

It's late by the time he arrives at HQ, and navigates the halls to Kaeya's office.

He walks up to the door and goes to knock, only to notice it's ajar.

He hears Albedo's voice,  followed by Kaeya's

Kaeya is confiding in Albedo, his guilt and worries, his fear of Diluc remembering and the hate that would return

Diluc listens and feels dread growing

Eventually he steps away from the door and leaves silently, resolving to spend the night at the Angel's Share and return the booklet in the morning.

--

Diluc arrives in the morning with the book and is met by an excited Jean and Lisa

They ferry him to Albedo's lab where Kaeya and the alchemist are waiting

Diluc passes the booklet over as they explain they finally developed a treatment for him

Albedo begins to explain it, before Diluc cuts in with an "I refuse"

Cue confusion

Jean asks why

Diluc gives his reasoning. He cites all the evidence of his present day misery, and then quotes Kaeya's prior statement of 'Crushing his happiness with the truth'

He has an objective knowledge of some traumatic events, and an idea on others; he doesn't want to remember them.

He makes it a point to look to Kaeya, assuring him that he has nothing to worry about anymore.

He thanks them all formally and states his intention to continue his life with his 'condition', and 'be happier for it'

He leaves, leaving the group of them stunned

Diluc reflects on his decision and decides he's made the best decision for his own happiness, and begins to think about his future

He considers maybe re-joining the Knights at some point, once he settles more
-
Time passes, he refuses multiple requests from everyone to accept treatment for his condition until eventually they give up and simply leave it as an open offer

He lives his daily life, but suffers the growing feeling that he's forgotten something important.

He is at the Angel's share manning the bar, idly skimming a newspaper that describes a slight uptick in crime and threats since the Dark Knight hero's disappearance

Kaeya is sitting at the end of the counter with his drink, quietly enjoying it

The door opens and the Traveler and Paimon walks in

Paimon greets Diluc gleefully and Kaeya returns the greeting, asking about their visit to Inazuma

Paimon touches on it briefly and expresses her gratitude for how kind Mondstadt is as a region.

They turn their attention to Diluc, only to notice something is up

Diluc apologetically explains he has no idea who they are

Both are surprised as hell, and Paimon is paimon

Kaeya briefly touches on things, and Diluc lifts an eyebrow

Kaeya explains that they are two of a very precious few who Diluc trusts immensely, so he knows it's okay to divulge information

They offer to do some research for him, Kaeya explains a treatment has already been developed

Paimon is relieved until Diluc states he refuses to accept it

More confusion, but Diluc shuts it down. He apologizes for forgetting, and hopes perhaps they can rekindle their friendship

The traveler agrees, though Paimon is sassy about it

Eventually they go off to talk to Kaeya and Diluc heads down to the cellar, pausing halfway to muse over this new discovery.

He leans against the stone wall and hears a faint grind. He takes a moment to investigate and finds a hidden door.

He ducks through to investigate and finds a small underground room and a tunnel.

A quick light of a lamp, he looks around and discovers the Dark Knight hero outfit.

At first he wonders who left it there, but he immediately realizes it's his when the lenses in the mask fix his vision brilliantly

He makes the connections with the timing of the DKH's disappearance and his own amnesia

He begins to have second thoughts, but decides that it's up to the Knights to protect Mond, and he can re-join and do his part.

Settled on that course of action, he returns to the bar and finishes the evening
-
Time passes and he's in his study, fiddling with the pin from his pocket as he lazes over his paperwork

A pecking at his window draws his attention and he sees a bird pecking at it

He opens the window and finds a message in its talons

He takes the letter and the bird flies off

Opening it, he discovers it's in a code he can't read.

He puzzles over it, thinking it looks familiar, before spotting the pin on his desk

He remembers the cypher disk and digs it out, looking at the two.

Several minutes of fiddling and he discovers how they slot together, and quickly realizes they combine to make a decoder

He spends some time cracking the cypher, and eventually decodes the message; a call to meet

The time and place was that night, at midnight

He hesitates but decides he can likely trust this sender, given the decoder
-
Cut to that night, the air is chilly and the sky is threatening rain

He arrives around the side of the city walls, and regards the hooded man

The man questions Diluc as to what he's been doing, using a code name

Diluc hesitates, and decides to admit the truth

The man is taken aback, but muses that it made sense with his sudden personality shift and lapse of duties

Diluc asks for clarification

The man says it would be best not to reveal much, but explains he's a member of an intelligence network; a very valuable and high ranking one at that.

Diluc begins to wonder how much he's lost

The man asks if he knows if he'll get better

Diluc hesitates again but again tells the truth

The man frowns and muses on the selfishness, but also can't entirely blame him

He says they need him; his help is invaluable, but in this state they can't force him; he's useless to them as he is.

The man bids Diluc a good day and leaves, leaving Diluc in a state of confusion

He makes his way to the gate and steps into the city, battling his own thoughts and having a Crisis as it slowly begins to rain

He stops outside the cat's tail and looks at the sky, cursing it, before letting his idle glance land on the cat tail's board

He recognizes his handwriting and reads the message

This compounds his crisis and sends his head into static

Reference KAeya's story lines about truth, duty, happiness, and loyalty

He moves to rip the papers down in fury, but stops himself and makes himself not be destructive

Instead he turns and takes off at a run out of the city as the rain begins to fall heavily

As he charges down the road, his path crosses with Kaeya

Diluc stops short, distressed and battling his own decision

Kaeya looks worried and moves to step close to check on him, but hesitates

This is what pushes Diluc over the edge

He demands Kaeya tell him the truth

KAeya is confused, of course

Diluc clarifies; why did we fight. What happened that was so terrible?

He wants to hear it from Kaeya directly. He thanks him for trying to look out for his happiness; it means a lot to him, but he has to know for sure.

Kaeya asks why the sudden shift

Diluc explains that he doesn't know what he's supposed to do anymore, and is scared

The rain gets heavier

He doesn't want to run, but at the same time he can't bring himself to want to remember; so he wants KAeya to tell him

He begs KAeya to just tell him why they fought

"I don't want to tell you"

"Why?"

"Because I don't think I can bear seeing the hate so fresh in your eyes again."

Luc is floored.

He begins to demand an answer, before suddenly his chest starts pounding and his vision gets blurry

The current situation begins to overlap with something else[the past incident]

He stumbles and grips his head as he slightly disassociates

He comes back to find himself being supported by Kaeya, who looks genuinely worried

Luc grips him back and pleads one last time

Kaeya hesitates before giving in. He helps Diluc get to his feet and takes a few steps back

He looks to the ground, then to the sky, and with a wan smile murmurs 'how cruel'

He sighs and looks Diluc in the eye, and tells him the truth.

Diluc is alarmed at the revelation, and for an instant he feels anger at the decit. He feels it build and burn in his chest

But then he catches himself and looks his brother over; it's subtle, but KAeya has moved into a defensive stance

Kaeya is ready to defend himself

Diluc's head races as he processes all the info in junction with the glimpse he saw and his own feelings

He battles with himself before making a decision

He launches forward and Kaeya moves to dodge, only to have Diluc latch onto him in a crushing hug

He apologizes, and says it's okay and says everything he should have said that night

Kaeya is stunned still, and is totally crying but you can't see it in the rain

Slowly he hugs back, shaking, and clings tightly; more tightly than he ever had before, burying his face in Diluc's shoulder

Eventually they separate and Diluc voices his decision

"I don't want to remember, but... there is so much that I need to do, and I can't if I don't remember."

Kaeya understands, and invites him back to his home to rest; they'll go to the HQ in the morning

They arrive at Kaeya's home, and he has to borrow something dry to wear

They're about to go to bed, when Diluc hesitates and tells KAeya that he's scared

Kaeya tries to be comforting

Diluc admits it's childish, but acts if they could share a bed that night

Kaeya is hesitant, but gives in to Diluc's puppy eyes

They sleep back to back, but Diluc is comforted by the proximity
-
Next morning, Kaeya helps him with his rain-fucked hair and they get going to the HQ

Everyone gathers and he offers his apologies for putting it off

When asked why he changed his mind, Diluc explains that he has things he needs to do.

Lisa and Albedo explain the procedure, and that he'll need to be asleep for it

They'll explain that the magic is extremely traumatic to the conscious mind; Albedo theorises that it was done on him conscious for that specific purpose

She hads Diluc a tea and explains that it will put him to sleep to allow them to work; he should be back to 'normal' when he wakes up

Diluc asks if he'll remember the last few weeks

They say it's hard to say for sure

He's anxious, but he drinks the tea, and feels it hit him almost immediately.

He lies down on the cot and looks to Kaeya

He holds a hand out and Kaeya hesitantly accepts it

"I love you, Brother. That will never change."

Kaeya visibly doesn't know how to respond, and doesn't get a chance to before Diluc is out.
-

Diluc comes to an unknown amount of time later, delirious and confused

He realizes where he is slowly, confirmed by Jean immediately kneeling by his side

She asks how he's doing, and what he remembers

He asks why the fuck he's in the Favoinous HQ

Jean welcomes him back with an awkward chuckle

Diluc sits up and accepts a cup of coffee from Jean, taking some time to sort his own head

He remembers the domain first

Then everything else begins to filter back

"Where is Kaeya?"

Jean explains that he left the second the treatment was done; she doesn't know where

Diluc finishes his coffee, stands and adjusts his gloves in his old habit, and looks around

He then looks to Jean, hesitates

"Thank you."

[NOPE HAVE HIM TALK TO ALBEDO]

He then leaves and goes straight for Springvale

He finds Kaeya there, sitting by the shore with a Calla lily in his fingers

Kaeya turns and is surprised to see him, then asks if he's there to pick a fight.

He slowly stands as he explains he did his best to respect his boundaries while he was amnesiac, even if he made it hard.

Diluc crosses his arms and slowly approaches as Kaeya talks, until he's standing just a couple paces away

"Shut up." Diluc says before hugging him tightly

Kaeya is omega what the fuck

Diluc struggles with his words, but explains that he wasn't lying before, when he said KAeya was wrong.

He lets go and talks

He explains he never hated him, and that he just made some shitty choices

Kaeya is stunned and looks at him as he talks

Diluc explains that the bout of amnesia offered him a new perspective, and is 'now able to see the unclouded truth'

He pauses, takes a deep breath, looks Kaeya in the eye

"I'm sorry."

Kaeya asks if this is a joke

Diluc assures that it isn't

"I should have said this then: It's not your fault. It was never your fault." KAeya came clean on his own; his choice was made

Luc hesitantly holds his hand out

He asks if they can try again, to be brothers. He promises that he won't repeat the mistakes of the past

"I hope you can trust me."

"I never truly stopped." Kaeya replies, accepting the shake.

Luc pulls them into another hug, this time returned fully and without apprehension

"I love you, Brother. I'm sorry I ever made you doubt that."

"I love you too, Luc. Always have."

Chapter Text

Flipped Coin 1

Kaeya’s day was normal to start with; training with recruits in the morning, going out in a field mission after lunch, and then in his office doing after-action reports that evening. All in all it was rather dull, and he found his eyes beginning to cross as he read the same line on Amber’s scouting report for the third time.
“Yeah, I’m done,” he mumbled, dropping the document to the desk and signing off on it. Amber hadn’t turned in a bad report yet, and if there were anything of concern, she’d have proactively mentioned it.
With that final document signed, Kaeya sighed heavily in relief, knowing he was now done for the day. He just had to drop the small stack off with Jean and he could go to the tavern.

Paper tucked under one arm, he made his way down to the main lobby quickly, his boot clicking against the stone floor as he reached the bottom. He took long strides towards Jean’s office, through halted for a brief and surprised instant as a voice echoed through the door.

“-wor...d is go...g on?!”

The voice was familiar, but he didn’t waste time trying to place it and all but hurled the door open, looking over the room as he spoke. “I heard yelling, is everything okay?”

And then he processed the full scene before him. Jean looked on the verge of panic, and Albedo had those faint creases of deep contemplation that those who didn’t know him would miss.

“Kaeya.” Diluc’s voice was a lance through his chest, yanking his attention to the red-haired man who looked at him with such relieved affection he nearly felt sick. His expression got away from him, as made evident by the near whine his estranged sibling let out. “Not you too, Kaeya.”

Kaeya, unable to form words, just looked to Jean and Albedo for some measure of an explanation. Diluc’s behavior was more akin to before Crepus died than the man he knew now.

He forced his voice level as he managed to finally speak; “Care to fill me in?” he asked, nervously shuffling the reports in his hand as casually as he could as he kicked the door closed behind him.

“Based on the information provided by Master Diluc, as well as his behaviors and current state, my hypothesis is that he is suffering from some form of retrograde amnesia.” Albedo, reliable as always, came through with an explanation. Kaeya’s soft noise of distress was drowned out by Diluc’s much louder protests.

Albedo continued to speak, giving every piece of evidence to support the conclusion Kaeya had felt in his gut from the instant he laid eyes on Diluc. He stared hard at the floor in thought, desperately attempting to settle his vibrating thoughts as he sorted through the backwards reality he found himself in. Diluc’s voice, a delicate crack of a sound, ripped him from his chaotic reverie and made his head snap to look.

“Kae?, what’s happening? This is some bad joke, right? Please tell me this is some bad joke?”

The desperation was audible, and Kaeya felt the conflicting emotions of wishing to comfort and holding back. To shatter the last bit of hope the amnesiac had, or to…

He inhaled harshly, and let his breath out slowly, like Albedo had taught him.
“Read the date in the upper right of this report,” he said as he held the documents out, watching as Diluc cast him a concerned look. Slowly he took them, and spent a few seconds looking them over.

Kaeya could see the exact instant reality struck like a hammer’s blow, and for a brief moment he thought he’d have to reach out and catch the man.

“This is a joke, right?” Diluc’s voice sounded almost desperate. “This is-”

“The truth,” Kaeya said.

“You’re telling me I’ve forgotten the last four years of my life?!”

The room fell into an anxious silence, and Jean had to gently lead Diluc by the arm to sit in a nearby chair as he visibly tried to process the new information. Kaeya shuffled briefly before he moved to Albedo’s side, seeking the blonde’s proximity as a stabilizing force. Up close he could see just how deeply the man was thinking; it was evident enough for anyone to notice by that point. The two of them watched in silence as Jean resumed her work treating Diluc’s injuries, and it wasn’t until she was done and the medical kit was shut with a click of finality did a sense of reality return to the room.

“I’ll go get us a pot of tea,” she said, turning to look at the two knights in the corner. “Albedo, Kaeya, can you sit with him for a bit?”

Kaeya’s voice caught, but Albedo spoke for them; “Of course.”

After a moment, Kaeya nodded.

“Thank you, I’ll only be a moment.” With that Jean left, closing the door behind her gently.

Kaeya kept his gaze on his boot, though was acutely aware of every confused and worried look that was directed at him by Diluc from across the room. He couldn’t think of what to say, and felt as though moving would shatter the delicate balance of silence in the room.

“Kae,” Diluc spoke, and Kaeya’s breathing stopped. “can you help me?”

Kaeya couldn’t even bring himself to look up immediately, but slowly forced his gaze upwards as Albedo spoke up in his place once more.

“He will be unable to clear his hair of them on his own.”

What? Oh, the thistles…

“It should be addressed before they become any more lodged inside,” Albedo finished, glancing towards the man at his side.

Moving as though with rusted gears, Kaeya nodded with a sigh. He pushed himself from the wall and found Jean’s spare brush in the nearby cabinet, fishing out the comb alongside it. He doubted she’d mind, given fetching his own would require him to go up two flights of stairs and down a hallway.
Kaeya approached Diluc slowly, anxiety gnawing a hole in his throat as a dichotomy of nostalgia and guilt fought viciously inside of him. His hands worked automatically with a familiar efficiency he had long since thought he lost, and the familiar scene replaying a million times in his memories. Diluc’s hair a disaster, and Kaeya willing and able to pick it apart without damaging it…
How cruel.

He fought to clear his head as his hands worked on their own, desperately trying to repress whatever it was he was feeling in that moment. The more seconds that ticked by the more he began to wonder where the hell Jean was; odds are it had only been a few minutes, and he was just anxious, but still.

Thankfully she returned not long after, and paused at the door as her eyes landed on him and her brush. She gave him a look, to which he could only shrug and gesture at the thistle snared disaster that was Diluc’s head.

She sighed softly and nodded, and took the tea tray to the desk. She spoke as she poured a cup and passed it to Diluc.
“So, I’ve given it some thought, and I think it’s best if we take you to the church.”

“I feel fine, aside from the memory thing.” Diluc argued, and Kaeya masterfully resisted the urge to laugh. The ‘Memory Thing’ was the issue; of course he was being resistant. It was…

Well it was very ‘Diluc’.

“The ‘memory thing’ is why you should go to the church,” Jean argued, parroting Kaeya’s unspoken thoughts. “What if you hit your head? We have no idea what happened to you!”

Kaeya knew an argument was going to start before it did, and was prepared for when Diluc’s teenage personality made things difficult. He had always been stubborn; modern day Diluc was just a bit more eloquent about it.

“I said I feel fine! My headache has eased up and, if I did hit my head, I’m pretty sure I’d know by now,” Diluc argued, glancing up at Kaeya before continuing. “And anyway, I don’t want to cause a fuss.”

Jean exhaled in the same way she did when arguing with Klee, and was about to reply when Albedo chimed in.

“I believe that taking him directly to the church may be unwise, though that is not to say we should avoid seeking out their aid.”

Jean frowned, and he continued.

“It would be an issue if the people found out the state of their Uncrowned King, do you not agree? Based on what we’ve been told, he has already aroused much concern from the people;” - that was an understatement - “it’s only a matter of time before rumors begin to flow. Taking him to the church will only startle the people, drawing even more attention to what is a very delicate condition.

Kaeya didn’t like that, but Albedo spoke true; Jean’s expression told him she thought the same. Their gazes met, and then he glanced down to see Diluc looking at him as well. He bore that agonizingly familiar expression; the one that was silently asking for his backup.

“I agree with Albedo,” Kaeya said, instead. “He could be…” He trailed off and glanced aside for a moment as his thoughts continued to fight. “…taken advantage of, in this state.”

Taken advantage of people like himself; like that selfish part of him that desired their old friendship and brotherhood. That greedy and cruel part that said this was his chance, to hell with Diluc’s feelings and desires, to have what he missed so desperately.

“It’s entirely possible the condition will alleviate itself with a day or two of rest and familiar environments.” Albedo spoke again, pulling Kaeya from his thoughts. “We can be assured that Barbara will act with discretion if you request her assistance, can we not?” He looked to Jean.

“Yes, I can trust her to keep this quiet…” Jean said softly, looking to Diluc with a worried expression. “Will that be okay?” she then asked him.

He half-heard the noise Diluc made in reply as his focus was – mercifully – taken up by a nasty bit of snarl that needed a more delicate approach.

“Fine,” Diluc said in resignation, twitching as Kaeya accidentally tugged a little too hard. “I mostly don’t want to raise a lot of alarm, so that’s fine. I would like to see Father, too.”

The second ‘Father’ came out of his lost sibling’s mouth, Kaeya lost all feeling in his fingers and fell still. He could feel Jean’ and Albedo’s gazes, but all he could really focus on was remembering how to breathe. The multiple realizations that stuck him at once were akin to a physical blow; Diluc forgot. He didn’t remember Crepus dying, not how, when, or why.
He felt like he was going to throw up.

Albedo’s elbow in his rib was what knocked him back to reality, and gave him the ability to talk.

“I’ll take him home and…” He forced his numb hands to move. “I’ll handle this.”

He could tell Jean detected his distress, but was restraining herself; she knew full well the same thing he did. She grasped her elbows as she shifted her weight and spoke. “Very well… I’ll send word to Barbara to visit the Winery early in the morning.”

Kaeya wasn’t sure how to continue the discussion, but yet again Albedo came to the… ‘rescue.’
“Would you consent to providing me with a blood sample before you depart?” he asked, ignoring the varying looks he received. Kaeya wasn’t sure if this was Albedo being Albedo, or some clever attempt at changing the subject…

It was probably just Albedo being Albedo.

“If his condition is not due to cranial trauma, it’s possible it’s a toxin of some sort; a blood dample will permit me to rule the possibility out.”

Yep. Just him being him.

Kaeya phased out of the conversation at that point, his mind whirring furiously with what would need to be done. Stick to plans, not abstracts. Hide the condition, find a solution, return to the status quo before he does anything stupid.

“For the time being, it’s best if you minimize conversation with anyone unaware of your condition,” he voiced his thoughts as they came. “It wouldn’t be hard for someone to figure out something is different at this stage.”

“Surely four years hasn’t made that big of a difference?”

Oh Diluc, you had no idea.

“…Give the people of Mond more credit,” he sighed.

The pair went back and forth a little; Kaeya suggesting something and Diluc being difficult, but eventually the topic screeched back to the one subject Kaeya didn’t want it to.

“Is that where Father is?” Diluc asked after Kaeya mentioned they would go to the Winery. A misstep. “Isn’t the manor closer?”

Kaeya thought up a deflection quickly. “The best place to go is the Winery. We’ll make sure everyone who needs to know is informed.”

Thankfully that seemed to suffice, and Diluc stopped pushing conversation and relaxed in the chair.
Kaeya buried his thoughts in the pile of thistles that built upon Jean’s desk, and was forced to return to reality once the last of them were gone and the brush ran smooth. The second he could he practically fled from Diluc’s side, thistles in tow, and began to clean the brush out. “Try to avoid any thorn bushes going forward, okay?” he said as he moved, trying to disguise the anxiety in his body language with levity.

“I promise it’s not a habit I want to make,” Diluc replied with a laugh, seeming not to have detected the full extent of Kaeya’s mood.

Albedo’s timely reappearance gave him another much needed reprieve from interacting, and allowed him to draw back and mentally prepare himself for what was going to be a very stressful evening. Unfortunately Albedo was in ‘scientist mode’ and left without so much as a sideways glance, leaving Kaeya to handle it alone for now.

“What a strange man.” Diluc’s voice was soft, and in that moment Kaeya remembered he hadn’t actually met Albedo before.

“He’s a genius.” Kaeya said the first thing that came to mind. “I have no doubt that, if there is anything to find, he’ll find it. Odds are he’ll know before dawn.” He had utmost faith in that fact.

“I’ll ask him to leave me a report; I’ll bring it with me in the morning,” Jean said, to which he responded with a wordless nod.

Then he sighed, and accepted the reality he would have to face. “Ready to go, then?” he asked Diluc, turning to face him.

“Sure.”

Chapter Text

        Kaeya needed to think to remember exactly how he wound up in Albedo’s lab.
        It wasn’t like it was strange to see him there; it’s where he spent a notable amount of time. The issue was the ‘how’ and ‘when’.
        He made himself breathe and put together the sequence of events, the sound of Albedo moving around the room helping ground him in the moment.
        He’d left the headquarters and ran into Diluc, who wanted to join him on his mission. While he successfully convinced him in the end not to accompany, he rearranged his plans to talk to members of the Winery staff about something first, and went on his field mission afterwards.
        On the way to the Winery, Diluc tried to initiate conversation, and Kaeya put his walls up without thinking too much about it. He could see Diluc’s expression, but ignored it.
        A flurry of snow and laughter; Diluc started a fight he couldn’t win in the snow and ice. Kaeya, carried away, got wrapped up gleefully in the game and had quite a good time.
        That shouldn’t be a problem. It shouldn’t be a problem.
        Why was it a problem?
        Kaeya startled as the sensation of light fingers brushed along his shoulder, which made his  head snap up to look, his eyes meeting Albedo’s. The blonde looked at him with a gentle expression of concern as he allowed his hand to rest fully on Kaeya’s shoulder.
        “Do you wish to talk?” he asked quietly.
        “It’s quite silly,” Kaeya attempted to deflect, “I don’t know why I’m so worked up over it.”
        “You’re upset by it; I haven’t seen you like this since Master Diluc first lost his memories.” Albedo paused, then resumed. “Is it safe to say he is associated?”
        Kaeya sighed. “Yeah, that obvious?”
        “An educated guess, is all. I won’t make you talk about it, but I’m willing to listen. Did something happen?”
        Kaeya hesitated then, and eventually gave in to his need to talk about it. He let his defenses down a little; something he did only for this one person.
        “Diluc insisted on coming with me as I went on my missions for today,” he began, watching Albedo softly nod from the corner of his vision. “He tried to convince me to let him accompany me to investigate Wolvendom; when I shut him down, he let it go, but I could tell he was put out by it. Next thing I know he throws a snowball at me. I’m so surprised he managed to get another one off before I just...”
        A moment of silence, and then Albedo hummed softly in a quiet encouragement to continue.
        “We got into a snowball fight. A big one; he didn’t stand a chance, of course.” Kaeya’s voice had a faint hint of amusement in it, his thoughts going to the bittersweet memory, still fresh in his mind.
        “Did something go wrong?”
        “Not at all. I won, and we ended it laughing. I hadn’t laughed that hard in a while.”
        Albedo was quiet for a while, visibly puzzled. Eventually he spoke. “That doesn’t sound like something I would consider to be a problem, Kaeya.”
        “That’s the problem, Bee,” Kaeya said, his voice cracking as he let the pet name slip. “That’s the most fun we’ve had together since we were teenagers, but I know for a fact Diluc wouldn’t have consented to that.” Putting it to words helped him work through his feelings, and he found it coming easier as he continued. “Every time I let slip old habits, I’m just making things worse for when he remembers.”
        He could Albedo sigh softly, and then felt the weight of the smaller man leaning against him as arms wrapped around his shoulders. “Has he not made it clear that he wouldn’t hold it against you?” he asked.
        “I know this Diluc means it, 100%, but he can’t speak for his modern self and we both know that.” Kaeya felt his chest ache, and Albedo’s touch could only ease the pain so much. “I’m trying so hard to keep my distance, and he’s doing everything in his power to get around it. I just… I can’t keep doing this, Bee.” Kaeya’s voice cracked again, and he felt the desperate urge to cry well up; an urge he fought down violently. “This juggling act of keeping both of them happy. I can’t bear the thought of Diluc’s wrath once he remembers and sees how I took advantage of him; but I can’t bear to see the sadness in his expression, either.”
        Albedo moved to his side, facing him as much as he could with the table in the way. “We both know you aren’t taking advantage of him,” he tried to argue.
        “Then why does it feel like I’m betraying what little trust there may be?” Kaeya said without thinking, unable to stop the flood of emotions now they were let free. He felt and sounded defeated; broken. “He’s going to remember and things are going to blow up, and then it’ll go back to how it used to be; but probably worse. As much as I would give anything to reclaim what we had back then, I can’t.”
        Albedo sighed, and then Kaeya flinched in discomfort as he felt Albedo’s knuckle gently rap on his forehead. “You’re too stuck in your own head. For someone so smart, you can be awfully dumb.”
        Quite harsh words from the normally kind-spoken Alchemist, and their brusque honesty briefly knocked Kaeya from his spiral.
        “Wh-?”
        “You know Diluc the best, don’t you? Even after everything, you always seem to understand what he’s thinking and what he’s going to do,” Albedo continued, “yes, perhaps how he presents himself has changed, and perhaps there have been some core changes, but you’ve proven you know how he conducts himself; do you actually think that would happen? Or is it some biased hypothesis you’ve cooked up out of anxiety?”
        It was easy to forget that Albedo was actually quite good at social interaction and nuance; he was just easily exhausted by it. Kaeya grit his teeth, and knew full well he’d been argued into a corner.
        “Maybe,” he acquiesced, sighing and half draping over the desk. “It’s not that easy to shut my thoughts off.”
        “Perhaps so, but there is nothing to be gained by lingering on them; simply remind yourself that they’re unsubstantiated conclusions, and try to keep going.”
        “Easy for you to say,” Kaeya half laughed, though there was no heat in his words.
        “Indeed. If you wish for a distraction, I could use a hand.”
        “Of course, Bee.”

-

        Kaeya managed to feel better by the time morning came. Albedo’s way of looking at things, and unwavering insistence on it, was beneficial; even if it was a bit bull-headed in nature.
        He’d slept in, opting to use Albedo’s bed rather than go home and be alone. Because of this, the first face he was met with was that of his partner. Albedo had taped a small note to himself, which simply said to wake him at a specific time; which was about an hour from then.
        Free from duties that day, and left to his own devices, Kaeya opted to lay in bed for another twenty minutes before getting himself around and going down for breakfast for them both.
        Despite the note’s listed time, Albedo was awake and talking to Lisa by the time he returned with their food.
        “So much for the wake-up call,” Kaeya teased, putting the lighter plate in front of the alchemist, ignoring the tiny smile on Lisa’s face.
        “I couldn’t sleep much; I continued my work after you went to bed, and we finally figured it out.”
        Kaeya felt his stomach drop.
        “Figured it out?” he parroted.
        “We have finally developed a treatment that should work,” Lisa finished, not beating around the bush. “We’ve sent word for Master Diluc already, and Jean has been informed. If all goes well, he will remember everything by the end of the day.”
        “That’s...” Kaeya tried to speak, but found himself hesitating more than he’d rather. “That’s great!” He managed, eventually.
        Lisa and Albedo could both clearly see the false bravado, but mercifully said nothing, and instead began to talk between themselves about technical things that went a bit over his head.
        Kaeya sat down across the room with his food and, though his breakfast felt like ash in his mouth, forced it down anyway.
        Eventually Albedo came to his side and sat down beside him wordlessly. There wasn’t much to be said, though he could tell that Albedo was acutely aware of his mood.
        Quietly, Albedo did eventually speak. “The breakthrough happened after you went to bed,” he said. “I was up until quite late finalizing it, and confirmed it with Lisa shortly before I laid down.”
        “I see… ironic timing, isn’t it?”
        “I suppose it could be seen that way.”
        Unseen from others, hidden by the table, Albedo gently clasped the other’s hand in his in wordless support.
          Neither said anything for a while, and it wasn’t long before Diluc and Jean came through the door. Jean was radiating positive energy, though he could immediately sense that Diluc’s own mood was surprisingly inconsistent with the news he should have been given.
        Kaeya immediately put on his facade, and he could feel Albedo squeeze his hand one more time before standing.
        “Kaeya, here.” Diluc approached and held something out, and it took Kaeya a moment to identify his notebook; how had he not noticed it vanished?!
        “Ah, I’d wondered where that had gotten off to. Thanks,” Kaeya lied.
        “You’re welcome. Now, what’s this about?” Diluc let his gaze sweep over everyone, revealing that he didn’t know what this was about yet.
        “Well, we’ve finally figured out a treatment for you!” Lisa spoke up first, pleased as punch.
        “Over the last few months, I have been running simulations using the brain scan data I had acquired from the machine, tracking how they different from normal activity to track down how it’s affecting you.” Albedo began to explain his process. “Working with Lisa, we were able to-”
        “I refuse.” Diluc cut Albedo off harshly, his voice firm and unyielding.
        The hush that hit the room was eerie, and it was almost as though no one was even breathing for a moment. Kaeya’s head pounded in confusion and anxiety; what?
        “I refuse.” Diluc said it again, not unlike the second hammer strike to ensure a nail remained in place. “Thank you for all of your efforts to help me. I appreciate it more than you know, but I refuse.”
        Jean gained her voice first.
        “...Why?”
        Diluc’s jaw set tightly as his eyes once again swept the room, taking in everyone’s expression. Kaeya had no idea what his own was like, as he found himself trapped in a psychological cycle of anxiety, guilt and hope.
        Anxiety in the long term consequences.
        Hope that maybe what they had known could persist; that he could stop being scared of a possibility that wouldn’t come.
        And guilt. Because how dare he feel that relief.
        It was a painful reliving of a past grief; of the relief he felt upon his father’s death. How was this any different? The old Diluc would ‘die’ if this decision was maintained and, just like with Crepus’ death, the guilt and weight of lies and impending consequence would dissolve.
        Kaeya couldn’t process what Diluc said immediately, but managed to catch up after a few seconds.
        “Because I don’t want to remember. The way people reacted to me when I first lost my memory, how so much as smiling was a thing of note. How even a child like Klee thought I was nothing but piss and vinegar; a bully. How miserable must I have been, to shun the people I care about?” Diluc’s resolve was audible, his eyes conflicted but ultimately resolute in his decision. “All of the research I’ve done, everything I’ve learned. It’s horrible. It’s traumatic. I know exactly how Father died, I know about Ursa, I know about Eroch and why I left the Knights. I know I left for three years, and was left with this body that is covered in so many scars it’s a wonder how I survived some of them.”
        Yet again, all sound was sucked from the room, and even Albedo had taken on an eerie stillness.
        “I don’t want to remember. I’m happy, I’ve adapted to my ‘condition’. Like Kaeya said, I don’t want my happiness to be crushed by the truth. So I’ll simply choose to leave it in the past and move on.” Diluc continued.
        Then he looked at Kaeya, and immediately Kaeya had to fight to keep from panicking.
        Then he smiled, and Kaeya had to keep from begging him to stop.
        I don’t deserve that smile. Stop.
        “You don’t have anything to worry about, Kae.” No. Please, don’t. “I promise. I’m going to continue as I am, and be happier for it.” This isn’t right. This isn’t right. “Thank you all again, I’ll try to make it up to you.”
        How did he know?
        Kaeya didn’t register Diluc leaving, and only snapped back to reality when someone gently shook his shoulders. His eyes focused on the worried faces of Jean and Albedo, Lisa hanging at the back of the room.
        Everyone was visibly thrown, though their attention was clearly on him.
        “Kaeya?” Jean’s voice was soft and concerned.
        “I’m okay,” Kaeya croaked out a lie.
        “Kaeya-” Jean’s admonishment died off as Albedo shook his head.
        “I’ll take him to my quarters for a while. I’ll follow up with you later on,” he said. After a moment, Jean nodded.
        “Take care of him. I’m going to try to convince him otherwise,” she declared, quickly turning to leave the room. Lisa followed behind her wordlessly, allowing two men to be alone.
        Unlike before, it was clear Albedo didn’t know what to say, and simply settled for wrapping his arms around his head and shoulders, resting his cheek on his hair.
        Kaeya began to shake, his eyes burning; conflicted emotions turned into a painful agony that made it impossible to breathe, as each breath felt like a choking flame. His right eye hurt, his head hurt, his heart hurt, his soul hurt.
        Everything hurt.

Chapter Text

         The rain was being a right prick, and Kaeya was not a fan.
        It was what could only be described as a ‘downpour’, and Kaeya was all the way back in Wolvendom when it began to come down, which meant he had to walk all the way back to the city in a deluge. He thankfully had the foresight to pack his rain cloak, which offered him a degree of comfort as it kept him from becoming absolutely drenched.
        He’d mostly zoned out as he walked; subconsciously aware of potential threats, but mostly in his own idle thoughts. He had managed to recover from the stress and pain of Diluc’s decision, though the sense of conflict in his heart would likely be ever-present.
        His thoughts weren’t as chaotic as they used to be, and he slipped into what was almost a meditation as he listened to the rain fall. Eventually they drifted to Diluc, and with it the idle hope that he wasn’t having too hard of a time from downpour.
        It wasn’t long before he had his answer, given to him in the form of a disoriented and waterlogged Diluc sprinting across the bridge and onto the muddy road.
          “Diluc?” Kaeya spoke without thinking, and watched the man come to a sliding stop and whip around to face him. He could see near mania in his brother’s eyes, and approached with concerned caution. “Diluc, are you okay? We should get you out of the rain...”
        He reached out, going to put his hand on Diluc’s shoulder, only to hesitate at the last moment.
        “Kaeya, tell me the truth.” Diluc’s voice was sharp, his words confusing and without context.
        “What? Tell what truth?” He was honestly confused, unsure what he was being asked.
        “Tell me why we fought! What was so absolutely terrible that I would treat you so horribly?!” Diluc’s voice nearly cracked as he made his demands. “I need to hear it from you, Kaeya.” Despite the hitch in his voice, his eyes were assured and unyielding, and the intensity of their gaze made Kaeya feel sick.
        Kaeya was silent, his voice gone as he came to terms with the bait and switch he’d been presented with. He should have known it wouldn’t last.
        “I…” Diluc began to speak again, his tone softer. “Thank you, Kaeya, so much. For looking out for me, for my happiness… It means so much and I should have trusted you from the get-go, but…” He paused, as though assuring himself of his decision. “I need to know, and I need to hear it from you. Please.”
        Kaeya knew the pain in his heart was evident in his expression as he was almost able to feel the shredding of the bandage that had been put upon it by the very man who was now ripping it off.
        “Why the sudden shift?” He asked, either stalling or genuinely wanting to know, he wasn’t sure.
        “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore,” Diluc said, his voice tense. “I’m scared. I don’t want to run, but I can’t bring myself to want to remember. Please, just… tell me why? Why are things so horrible between us? I can’t bring myself to be willing to remember without knowing.”
        Kaeya forced himself to talk, and for once found honesty coming easier. “I don’t want to tell you.”
        “Why?”
        Defeated, he continued. “Because I don’t think I can bear seeing the hate so fresh in your eyes again.”
        He watched as Diluc opened his mouth to talk, only to shut it as he tried to think; to process what must have been a shock. He even wobbled, and his eyes took on a distant look. His balance got worse and he tilted violently, and Kaeya had to lunge to catch him before he hit the ground.
        Diluc muttered quietly, his hands gripping his head as he was clearly in the throes of a flashback. “No, no, no, no –“
        “Hey, come on, stay with me,” Kaeya said, jostling him and trying to bring him back as he held his upper body up off the road. “’Luc, come on now.”
        Diluc opened his eyes, looking up at the other man as he finally snapped back to reality. Immediately he reached up and grabbed Kaeya’s shirt in a death grip, looking desperate. “Kaeya, please,” he croaked. “I need to know why. I don’t want things to go back to how they were, but I need to know why.”
        The pain in Kaeya’s chest felt like he was going to die, and he had to fight to keep breathing – to keep from crying. He didn’t want to go back. He didn’t think he could bear it.
        But it was probably for the best… wasn’t it?
        Slowly he lifted his head to the sky, allowing the rain to fall upon his face as he allowed the despair to turn into sad acceptance.
        “How cruel,” he muttered, assisting Diluc back to his feet.
        He then took several long strides away, putting distance between them before turning to meet his eyes.
        “Are you sure?” he asked, hoping perhaps Diluc would change his mind.
        But instead the redhead just nodded.
        Very well then.
        He shifted his stance ever so slightly and began to speak.
        “I wasn’t abandoned the way you think I was,” he began, keeping his voice level. “My father left me here as a spy, to infiltrate your family and to become part of Mondstadt.” He watched Diluc’s expression closely as he spoke, and could watch the shock and horror cross the man’s face; identical to how it was before. What little glimmer of hope he had began to fade. “My duty was to feed Khaenri’ah information when war broke out.”
        With that, he watched the familiar dance of emotion flicker across Diluc’s expression, and suppressed a wince at the lance of agony that went through his body. Instead he focused on preparing, and shifted his stance a little more; prepared to defend himself from the cycle of history.
        Diluc stood there for longer than Kaeya thought he would, his expression growing into an unreadable mix of… something.
        In the brief instant Kaeya let his guard down, Diluc charged. Unlike how he expected, however, there was no glow of a Vision nor glint of steel swinging towards him, and instead he stumbled back heavily as he felt like he was tackled.
        No, not tackled – Diluc wasn’t trying to wrest him to the ground.
        No, he was being hugged.
        Kaeya’s mind went blank, and he struggled to process what he was being presented with. He felt Diluc bury his face into his shoulder, and he went stiff in the man’s grasp as the other spoke.
        “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
        What?
        “It’s okay now, Kaeya, I promise. It wasn’t fair of me, you deserved so much better and I failed you.” Diluc spoke rapidly. “I’m so sorry.”
        Those words were like lightning bolts, but unlike the painful lances like before, these were warmer and unexpected; something he wanted to hear but never thought he would.
        “You’re my brother, you’ve always been my brother. Your origins don’t matter; it wasn’t your choice! You were just a kid!” he continued, squeezing even tighter. “I don’t want to lose you; you’re all I have left and I want to fix it. Everything.”
        A deep part of him wept, a child hidden away in his heart that felt the genuine affection that Diluc offered; and it was that child that urged his arms to move and wrap around Diluc in return. Gentle at first, but then tighter and tighter, until it was as though letting go would be losing him forever. He buried his face in Diluc’s shoulder as well, all while the child wept through his eyes. He could feel the warmth of his tears through the rain, unmistakable and unhidden.
        He didn’t want to let go, but eventually they had to, and Kaeya knew his expression bore his heart, his frozen mask melted away to leave him vulnerable. Diluc wasted no time with additional silence, and spoke.
        “I don’t want to remember, Kaeya,” he said, his voice strained. “I don’t want to hurt you again, and I don’t know if I’ll remember this, but… there is so much I have to do, so many people depending on me that I had no idea about.” His gaze kept flicking to the ground as he talked, his own uncertainty obvious. “I can’t do any of it if I don’t remember, but I don’t want to push you away again. I don’t want to return to such a miserable life, I don’t want to remember the blood on my hands.”
        Kaeya nodded, and understood the sentiment entirely. It was pretty clear at this point that Diluc had figured out his own secret identities; likely the pressure of it all was what prompted him to remember. Diluc always put others first, and even this bout of selflessness couldn’t overpower that protective sense of duty that pervaded his very marrow.
        “Kaeya, you’re my brother and I love you. If I don’t remember this, please remember that, no matter how I may act.” Diluc’s voice was pleading, and Kaeya winced at the thought of the status quo returning. He nodded after a moment, and Diluc continued. “I don’t want to remember, but I have to.”
        “I understand,” Kaeya managed to say after a brief hesitation. “We can go to the Headquarters in the morning, for now we should get out of the rain.” He felt fatigue weigh him down to his very core, and knew it showed in his voice.
        They didn’t need to talk as they returned to the city, and headed towards Kaeya’s home. They addressed their wet selves, changing into dry clothes and eventually found themselves on Kaeya’s couch. They sat in silence for ages, neither willing to break it. Eventually, however, Diluc’s voice filled the air, tense with anxiety.
        “I’m scared, Kae,” he said.
        Kaeya looked at Diluc in surprise, before his expression shifted to worry. He let out a small noise as he attempted to talk, but it fell dead on his lips.
        “I’m scared I won’t remember any of this. That ‘I’ will disappear entirely. That maybe the treatment won’t work and all the things I need to do will remain undone. That the Me That Isn’t Me- No. That I won’t allow us to fix things in my rage. I’m scared of the future. I’m scared of myself.”
        Diluc’s face scrunched, and Kaeya could tell he was fighting his emotions and attempting to keep his composure.
        “’Luc, it’s…” Kaeya couldn’t think of words at first and stopped to think. “I can’t say any of those will come to pass, I can’t say they won’t. But what I can tell you is that… no matter what happens, I’ll support you.”
        He watched Diluc nod before talking.
        “I know it’s childish,” he said, glancing aside, “but… can we share a bed tonight?”
        Kaeya blinked, briefly caught off guard, and nodded himself. “It’s not that childish, given the circumstances,” he comforted. “And even if it was, I think you have the rught to indulge a little bit in that.” Kaeya stood as he spoke, looking down to his sibling. “It’s late, we should try to get what sleep we can.”
        They made their way to the bedroom, and Kaeya did his bedtime routine automatically; checking all points of entry, making sure it was secure and safe to sleep. Diluc watched quietly, and eventually they both crawled into bed, back to back.
        It was nostalgic, heralding back to years past when they did this without hesitation. For the first time in a while, he felt himself properly relax – for the moment, at least.
        “Good night, Kaeya,” Diluc said quietly.
        “Good night, Diluc,” Kaeya replied.

-

        Morning came quickly. They prepared both physically and mentally, and made their way to the Headquarters.
        Jean was surprised but happy, and it didn’t take long before she took off to find the others.
        ‘Apprehensive’ was an understatement for how Diluc seemed, but he also seemed resolute in his decision. He sat down and visibly tried to center himself.
        “How are you feeling?” Kaeya asked.
        “Like I’m going to vomit,” Diluc’s reply prompted Kaeya to laugh, which he tried to force down. “Not funny,” Diluc frowned petulantly, but didn’t seem too put out.
        “I know, I’m sorry. Just…” Kaeya hesitated. “I get it. I’m nervous too. I trust them to do it right; I have no doubt you’ll be just fine. But… well, I’ve never been one to look towards the future with much hope, even when I try.”
        “I hope I’m not cruel to you when I wake.” Diluc’s voice was small.
        “I won’t hold it against you if you are.” Kaeya still couldn’t help but feel like he deserved it, even after everything.
        “You should. You should yell at me for being so dumb. I deserve it.” Diluc’s tone was sad, even frustrated.
        “I’m not sure how that would go, but it’s tempting,” Kaeya replied, offering a little bit of levity that let them exchange a light laugh.
        The others arrived then, and dread returned to Kaeya’s stomach. They prepared Diluc, got him into position, and gave him the sedative. It was clear how hard it hit, as Diluc almost immediately began to slouch to the side. Kaeya was at his side immediately, carefully holding him up as he helped him to lay down properly.
        He could see the lucidity fading from his brother’s eyes, yet the man still managed to lift his hand. Without thinking Kaeya grasped it tightly, his gaze not leaving Diluc’s face.
        “I love you, brother. That will never change, I promise.”
        Kaeya wasn’t sure if Diluc could feel how badly his hands shook then, almost vibrating as his very essence coiled in a cruel mix of despair and catharsis. He felt Diluc’s grip go loose, but held his hand for a few moments longer before resting it gently at his side.
        He stood then, wordlessly, and took a few steps back. He said nothing, thoroughly muted by the experience, and simply watched as Albedo and Lisa set to work. He didn’t understand a damn thing they were doing, but retained his vigil until they both called its end.
        Albedo moved to Kaeya’s side immediately; fully aware of his mood, it seemed. Kaeya remained silent, but Albedo spoke anyway.
          “He’ll be just fine. I don’t know how much he’ll remember from his amnesiac period, but the damage done by the Abyss has been undone. He’ll wake in a couple hours.”
        Kaeya nodded and pushed from the wall, turning towards the door to go. Albedo’s gentle grip on his sleeve stopped him, and made him look back.
        “Will you be okay?” the blonde asked.
        “Eventually. Hopefully,” Kaeya replied, his voice so quiet it was difficult to hear. “I’m going to get some air.”
        “Normally I wouldn’t ask, but given the circumstances, can you tell me where you’re going? Just in case we need to contact you.”
        Kaeya didn’t like the implications of that, but understood it was from a place of baseline caution.
        “Springvale,” he replied simply.
        Albedo nodded, then, and let go. Kaeya cast him one more soft look before resuming his trek, slipping out the doors and out of the city.

-

        Diluc’s arrival was equal parts expected and unexpected. Part of him suspected he’d want nothing to do with him, while a louder part said he was here to retaliate.
        He kept his eyes on the flower in his fingers as he spoke, weak and defeated. “Come to pick a fight? I tried to not overstep while you were amnesiac, I hope you know that.” He continued to talk as he forced himself to his feet. “You made it awfully hard, though. Surely you’re not so bull headed as to ignore that. I hope things can at least remain civil-”
        Kaeya spoke as he stood to look at Diluc, and watched as the man crossed his arms and approached, the look of impatience swapping to a flat look of… something. Unable to parse the truth behind it, Kaeya found himself trailing off into a confused noise.
        It was then that Diluc huffed irritably, turned his head, and spat out a spark of flame.
        Instantly a million conclusions formed and the massive truth of that singular action told him everything, but didn’t have even a second to respond to it before the wind was squeezed out of him from a crushing hug.
        “Shut up already,” Diluc grumbled. “I wasn’t lying before, you know. You were wrong. You are.”
        The grip eased, and Kaeya could pull some air into his lungs – though the task was difficult by how emotionally winded he felt. He couldn’t look away from Diluc as the man’s expression shifted to one more soft, his voice matching it as he continued to speak.
        “I never hated you, Kaeya. Not truly. I just made a lot of… really bad choices, one after another, and never really knew how to go back on any of them.” Diluc spoke, and each word chipped away at the wall of ice. “I got it in my head I couldn’t trust you, that everything about you was with a layer of deceit. I pushed you away because I had it in my head you would only hurt me. But that doesn’t mean I never stopped loving you. You’re my brother. This incident, so long without memories, has offered me a fresh perspective on everything. It let me see reality without the bitter lens of resentment I’ve forced myself to carry,” Diluc continued, “it has allowed me to see the unclouded truth.”
        Diluc paused then, and took in a deep breath before affirming the resolve in his eyes.
        “I’m sorry.”
        Two words, from the true mouth he wanted to hear them from – yet always felt he didn’t deserve to hear. Finally a sound made it through Kaeya’s throat, fragile and raspy. “Is… Is this a joke?” He let out a crackly laugh, impulse as he couldn’t do anything more than act on autopilot.
        “It’s not. I promise you it’s not.” Diluc’s tone was firm and reassuring as he reached out to grab Kaeya’s shoulders. “I should have said this years ago, none of that was your fault. You’re innocent, you didn’t have a choice in any of it. You told me on your own, you weren’t forced to do anything and you told me the truth.” Diluc spoke quickly but clearly, not giving Kaeya a chance to form a rebuttal. “I’m the one in the wrong here.”
        Then he let go, and took a small step back to give Kaeya room to breathe. Slowly Diluc then offered his hand, and with a more uncertain tone, spoke; “I would like to… if it’s possible, try to be brothers again. I promise you, I won’t repeat the mistakes of the past.” He paused then, and Kaeya could see the anxiety in his eyes. “I hope you can trust me, even after everything I’ve done to you.”
          Kaeya’s gaze fell to the offered hand as his mind finally processed everything, all of his emotions – good and bad – fell into place in a strange amalgamation of something acceptable. He smiled wanly, then felt it grow more sincerely as the reality of everything finally took root. He reached out and took the offered hand, then, squeezing firmly. “I never truly stopped, not when push came to shove.”
        With a yank, Kaeya felt himself hauled into another hug; one that Kaeya found himself far more eager to return this time.
        “I love you, Kaeya,” Diluc said, reaffirming the message that was finally beginning to take root. “You’re my brother and I’m sorry I ever made you doubt any of that.”
        For the first time in years, Kaeya’s honest words came as easy as clear water; “I love you too, ‘Luc. Always have.”
        They stood quietly for a time, then, but eventually a silly little question scratched at the back of his head; irrelevant and likely born of some desperate need to diffuse the emotional height of the moment.
        Might as well ask.