Chapter Text
Fry and Bender ended up taking three full days off of work. On the day they returned to Planet Express, the rest of the crew had gathered around the meeting table early in the morning and remained there for several hours. Marianne had arrived to pick Zoidberg up for a garbage collection date, but her attention was captured by the holographic images displayed above the table. Even Scruffy had been torn from his adult magazines by the spectacle.
The crew was currently watching a porno titled Chubby Ginger And Bending Unit Most Viewed Video XXX. They all gaped slack-jawed as their two absent coworkers engaged in vigorous sex on the screen in front of them. Though they'd been occupied with hours of such footage involving Fry and Bender, this particular video pushed the boundaries of even the most graphic robosexual porn.
"It's like a train wreck," Zoidberg cried. "I want to stop watching, and yet I can't bring myself to look away!"
"Spleck. I know Bender is a bending unit and all, but I never knew he could bend like that," Amy groaned.
"I hope I neva have to see him bend like dat again." Hermes recoiled away from the screen. "I don't t'ink I can take much more 'a dis."
"This is the most disturbing thing I've ever seen," Marianne agreed, clinging onto Zoidberg in fear and confusion.
At that exact moment, the doors wooshed open, and the robot and redhead in question stepped into the room.
"Sorry we're so late," Fry said, casually dusting off his jacket sleeves. "We, uh, had a busy night."
"Oh, we know you did," the Professor quipped.
"Everyone knows you did," Leela scolded, hands on her hips.
"Whaddaya mean?" Fry looked stupidly confused until he raised his eyes to the holo screen. He gasped sharply upon noticing the video on display. Bender uttered a quiet "whoa" when he saw the screen. All the eyes in the room turned to the robot.
"Uh, looks like I forgot to disconnect my live sex cam feed," Bender explained as he cast his optics toward his flustered human.
"You didn't tell me you had a live sex cam feed," Fry grumbled and hid his face behind his arms.
"It slipped my mind. I was a little preoccupied, in case you've forgotten."
"That's enough cam talk, you two," Leela interjected. She glared authoritatively at the bending unit. "Is this what you were so sick over the other day?"
"For your information, I actually was sick over it." Bender crossed his arms, returning Leela's glare. "And Fry took real good care of me."
"He took care 'a you, alright!" Hermes chortled. "Sweet porno 'a DiGiorno! I've neva seen two people go at it dat hard."
"Yeah, spleesh. Three days straight with hardly any breaks? That's splinsane!" Amy added.
"I concur." Nibbler suddenly appeared and scuttled up onto the table. "I had to step away from the carnage after that lubrication video." The Niblonian shuddered and made an adorable noise of disgust.
"Oh, my god." Fry collapsed into his seat in embarrassment. Bender habitually took his seat next to him.
"By the way," the Professor began, "while you two were busy committing sins of the highest degree, you missed several important deliveries, so I'll be docking your pay to make up for it."
"You haven't paid us in four months," Bender rebutted with a scowl. "Also, the deliveries we make are never important."
"Even so, what you've been doing is despicable! It's against nature!"
"Professor, how many times do we have to go through this?" Leela rolled her eye. "There's nothing wrong with robosexuality, or gay robosexuality, in this case."
"Leela is correct," Nibbler contributed. "While it is revolting to behold, Fry and Bender having an explicit relationship is extremely progressive. This could be beneficial to society on Earth as a whole."
"Now dat I t'ink of it, a couple of gay robosexuals working at dis company could be good fa' business." Hermes stroked his chin in contemplation of marketing opportunities. The Professor heaved a defeated sigh.
"Well, if we can use it to draw in customers, I suppose it's alright. That doesn't make it any less wrong, though."
The crew considered this enough of a win for a celebratory cheer. Zoidberg and Marriane embarked on their belated date, and Scruffy adjourned to the basement to reconcile with a certain sentient wash bucket. Hermes, Amy, and the Professor left the meeting room to attend to their respective duties. Leela scooped Nibbler off of the table and brought him to the couch for snuggles, leaving Fry and Bender alone in their seats.
"Well, at least they all accepted us," the redhead sighed. Bender wrapped his arm around Fry's shoulders and pulled him in to lean their heads against each other.
"Shut up, Fry."