Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

A new era of reconstruction has begun in the city of Priestella. After a gruesome attack by the Witch Cult, the once shining Watergate City lay in ruins. The battle was hard fought, but with the combined efforts of all five Royal Candidates for the throne of Lugunica and their attendants, the forces of Priestella managed to liberate the city. Two Archbishops of the Witch Cult were beaten: Regulus Corneas was reportedly slain by Reinhard van Astrea, with the assistance of Natsuki Subaru and his liege Lady Emilia, and Sirius Romanee-Conti was captured by Priscilla Barielle and the Songstress Liliana.

To celebrate the occasion, one of the candidates, Anastasia Hoshin, organized a party in the now somewhat repaired City Hall. Not many people were allowed in, of course. The list of invited guests included: all five royal candidates and their attendants, important members of the city's hierarchy (that only included Kiritaka Muse, the last member of the Council of Ten, and Liliana Masquarade, the city's famous Songstress), as well as a couple other wealthy citizens not worthy of the further description.

For Anastasia, or more precisely for Great Spirit Echidna, who currently possessed the body of her master, it was an opportunity to make the amends, since she was the one who dragged them here in the first place. There was the second reason, of course, that being the discussion about the expedition to Pleiades Watchtower. She suspected that she could acquire some help from the guests of the party.

Priscilla and her camp were out of the question – she would never help her out without a personal benefit. Crusch and her camp could be acquired with some concessions, as their alliance still technically remained, but they were of little value for their price, since Crusch and Felix are unable to leave the city. That left only the Sword Demon as a potential recruitment option, and only after he will make peace with his wife. That left only two options – the Emilia Camp and the Felt Camp. The spirit was too cautious to ask the Felt Camp for help, the Sword Saint was a very strong asset, yes, but the Slum Princess was too shrewd not to use that debt against her later on. The Emilia Camp was a better option, they could follow the idea of using Sage's knowledge to treat the victims of the Authorities of Lust and Gluttony. Echidna knew that the most important member of this camp (in her own opinion), Natsuki Subaru, held a personal reason to seek the cure for these conditions.

Anastasia had always been the type of person who valued information, especially information about her competition:

Even before arriving here, she knew that Lady Emilia's spirit, "The Beast of the End" Puck, was currently out of commission (there were no witnesses to the spirit appearance in the past year, not to mention that her rival's search for a specific kind of mana crystal made her feel that way).

Priscilla Barielle was likely a Prisca Benedict, a presumed dead member of the Vollachian Royal Family who fell during the ascension of current Emperor Vincent Vollachia nine years ago. She was doing a poor job of hiding this secret (if she was hiding it at all, it might be her way of promoting herself), as the similar name, similar appearance to the presumed dead princess of Vollachia, and more importantly, the Yang Sword that she wielded gave it away.

The Crusch Camp was currently crumbling due to the rumors that Crusch Karsten had "turned from the proud matriarch of the Karsten family to a completely different, fragile and unremarkable woman". She was not sure what was going on there exactly, but a sudden personality change could not occur without a reason.

Felt had a strong connection to the criminal underground of Lugunica, something that had not changed since her becoming the Royal Candidate. Anastasia overheard about some shady dealings going on between her and local gangs.

The merchant princess had a decent amount of private information, as well as a fair amount of dirt on all the Candidates and even their knights. There was but only one exception – the famous Lolimancer Natsuki Subaru. No dirty secrets, no known bad habits, absolutely nothing. In fact, even though he was the kind of person who could not keep his mouth shut, there was still no reliable information about him before the day he encountered the Sword Saint and saved his future liege (Anastasia managed to snag a copy of the Reinhard's report of the event).

The knight's origin was also unknown, his appearance and talents suggested either Gusteko (he possessed an incredibly high spiritual affinity, something common to the northerners) or Vollachia (there was a certain resemblance to the ruling emperor, suggesting he was a potential lost relative, a brother or cousin perhaps?), however his tastes suggested he was from Kararagi, something which surprised her when she invited the Camps to Priestella. He seemed to have been born into a rich family, had rather weird mannerisms, and wore an outfit that neither Anastasia nor Echidna had ever seen before.

Subaru also clearly had some sort of connection to the Witch Cult, as he was the one who first acted against the Sloth, Wrath, and Greed, and of course his hatred for the Cult was well known. The members of her Iron Fang who helped him kill Sloth figured that he was likely a surviving victim of the Cult, given he knew the nature of the abilities that the Archbishops possessed. The wildest theory that Echidna suggested to her partner was that he might be a former Archbishop himself, who for some reason decided to kill his colleagues in the name of a woman who resembled the Witch that the Cult supposed to worship. That would make him even more dangerous to her than he already was. Worse still, was the sheer influence he wielded, both in his home camp and outside of it, especially with the events in Priestella solidifying his place in Lugunica even further.

So there was a third reason for this party – to get the half-elf's knight sufficiently drunk in order to get to learn as much as possible about his origins. Fortunately for her, it seemed that quite a lot of other people also wanted to see how the famous knight would look and act like in a drunken state.

-----

"No, I won't."

Subaru repeated those words for the twelfth time tonight. He had been constantly bombarded by requests from people to have a drink or two to celebrate their victory. Unlike everyone else, he had managed to avoid alcohol completely since the party began. All the Candidates had at least one glass of wine – that included Felt and Emilia. The first was just barely over fifteen, and thus her knight allowed her to. The second politely took only one glass of wine, but refused to drink more, since she remembered rather embarrassing drunk incident that happened a year ago. Crusch drank a glass, despite Felix's concern for her health. Anastasia drank two glasses, mostly to keep appearances, and Priscilla finished two-thirds of her bottle, surprisingly showing zero signs of inebriation. Al, Ricardo and Otto had already emptied a bottle each, while Heinkel drank one and a half and was already in the familiar state of drunken stupor. Garfiel was drunk too, he had clearly developed a taste for it during this first drinking session. The Shield of Sanctuary was much more looser, especially with an orange ball of fluff clinging to his shoulder – he was much more receptive to the advances of Mimi Pearlbaton, who was equally drunk, despite the wishes of her brothers Hetaro and Tivey, the former two only drinking for a bit. The brothers wanted to use their Divine Protection of Trisection again, but were convinced by others to let go. Julius and Reinhard in a knightly fashion emptied one glass each. Felix in an unknightly fashion almost finished his bottle. Wilhelm also drank quite a lot – he had a wife to mourn. Rachins, Camberley, and Gaston drank surprisingly little, sharing only a single bottle between them (maybe they just did not like the wine?). Kiritaka and Liliana a shared their bottle as well, although the Songstress drank way more and was currently drooling on his shoulder (which did not bother him at all).

There were only three people who had not touched alcohol thus far: Schult was too young to drink, Beatrice, despite her being the oldest person in the room, said that her Mother forbade her to drink (which was a lie, of course, she just preferred to respect her contractor's opinion about it). The last person was Subaru.

"Come on, bro, you already had your eighteenth birthday and we didn't even celebrate it properly!"

"It's twenty, is it not?"

"It's eighteen or sixteen in most countries on Earth, besides, we in Lugunica, fifteen is the normal drinking age here."

"Natsuki-san, just have a one drink with us, that's all we ask."

Al was simply looking forward to having a drink with his bro, he knew the situation of the past few days had been quite stressful for him and had probably cost him a couple of loops (it certainly did for himself, anyway). Otto, however, had an incredibly malicious intent. That intent was to fulfill his personal vendetta for making him the butt of the jokes of the entire Emilia Camp. He thought that today's events would give him reason to tease him for at least a month. Unfortunately for him, the Fate thought otherwise.

Most people noticed how worried Subaru had been since the beginning of the party, certainly assuming that they knew the reason behind it. After all, this was the second time that the one he loved the most was threatened by the Witch Cult, so it made sense why he was so anxious about it.

The first attack had happened a year ago, and it had taken the efforts of more than half of the White Whale Subjugation Force, including the renowned Sword Demon and the Blue, to be there with him to prevent the tragedy. At that time, Emilia had been specifically targeted by the Sin Archbishop of Sloth, Petelgeuse Romanée-Conti, in his mad efforts to revive the Witch of Envy. Not only that, but Subaru was forced to slay one of the three great calamities along the way, the dreaded White Whale. Something that everyone in that ballroom thought was impossible, especially since it happened just days after Subaru's embarrassing debut in the capital.

And a second time, was just a few days ago, Emilia was once again targeted by the Witch Cult, this time she was kidnapped by the seemingly invincible madman who destroyed the entire fortress city of Garkla and its inhabitants all by himself – the Sin Archbishop of Greed, Regulus Corneas.

The actual reason why Subaru refused the offers was rather obvious – Return by Death, or more specifically, the taboo that was associated with it. Getting drunk was a great way to lose control of yourself, and make a nasty slip of the tongue. He really did not want to accidentally commit a massacre. Normally, Subaru would not be too worried about maybe saying something mean to Otto or making a fool of himself (again), but the images of the consequences of his own hubris were still quite fresh in his mind.

The memory of Emilia's gorgeous face sullied with blood, her amethyst eyes turning empty and lifeless, the beginning of necrosis, and her last living expression of not even understanding what was going on... All of it was incredibly painful, one of the worst memories he had thus far, on par with the Great Rabbit, on par with his first return to Arlam during the first days of the Royal Selection, on par with the crazed Emilia giving him a Kiss of Death, on par with Rem chasing him, on par with the Unthinkable Presents, on par with the unleashing of the Witch upon Sanctuary, on par…

His memories of the false pasts began to overwhelm him, making him instinctively to reach for his shoulder. Thankfully, there were two reasons why he did not have a self-harm episode in front of all the partygoers. The first was that he was wearing a long-sleeved outfit, and the second was that a small hand of the Great Spirit of Yin was currently holding his own. Gradually he calmed down, but continued to refuse any offers to drink.

"Stop pressuring Betty's contractor! If it is Subaru's decision not to indulge himself today, then you should stop pestering him about it, in fact."

Through their contact, Beatrice noticed his sudden and very strong emotional distress and decided to show him her unwavering support.

Subaru silently thanked Beako for that. She had no idea just how much her words and her mere presence had helped him. Thus far, she had been the only person on his side.

The thing is, deep down inside he wanted to drink, in fact, he wanted to be blackout drunk right about now. If he did not have to worry about it, he might have resorted to alcohol earlier.. Or maybe some illicit substances, Lugunica's laws were rather lax about them. He had already come across a few: Rem wanted to feed him a Fannel fruit to make him more relaxed, Emilia and later the children of Arlam village gave him a Boko fruit to keep his mana reserves up, there was also the tea Ram made for himself. Come to think of it, there was almost no control over these. Subaru, being Japanese, was rather traditional on the matter, especially when it came to hard drugs.

"Maybe this is something I can push for Emilia to implement once she becomes queen?"

As he considered the nature of narcotics legislation in Lugunica, the final and greatest blow to his confidence was dealt:

"Don't worry Subaru, I promise everything will be fine, you worked re-e-eally hard, so I want my knight to relax and have fun."

Emilia too wondered what Subaru would look like when wasted. After all, the last time he was inebriated, she already went way over-board, drinking herself to the point of drunken amnesia. Besides, from her perspective, Subaru always pushed himself way too hard and he definitely needed some rest.

Subaru looked at his liege with a half worried, half betrayed expression. For him, she was someone who he thought would be on his side as well. As it turned out, he was completely wrong. Worse yet, Emilia was the person who had the most sway on his decision. Dejectedly, his expression asked, no begged, for her to reconsider, however the half-elf did not relent and continued to smile at him, reassuring him that everything would be alright.

After another deep breath, Subaru finally surrendered.

"I just can't refuse any request from Emilia, can I?"

"Well alright, fine, I'll have one drink."

Subaru angrily emphasized the word "one" as much as possible. More than one person in the room grinned at his declaration.

That was a mistake.

-----

Meanwhile, far away from Priestella, hidden deep underneath the Pleiades Watchtower, behind the black door, a person imprisoned in her own dimension – Shadow Garden, the one that everyone feared, the one whom people called the Witch of Envy, Satella, observed Subaru with great interest.

Things were happier now, all things considered, and so Satella was happier as well: Envy inside her was mostly calm, at least compared to the usual – the taboo had not been violated for almost a year now. Her beloved looked really cool in the events of Priestella, especially when he faced that nasty Regulus. She was a bit saddened by his deaths at the hands of Sirius, but he seemed to be doing quite well despite them. There were quite a few deep-seated problems buried in her lover's mind, but so far he was holding up well, even his smile was quite genuine. It was not exactly good enough, in Satella's opinion, but it was way better than during the early Royal Selection or during the events of the Sanctuary.

Like Beatrice, she too was on her lover's side when it came to the matter of drinking (Satella was always on his side in all matters, but that was beside the point), so, even though he eventually reconsidered, she decided to do something nice for him. After some negotiation, she managed to convince the nasty part of herself, the Witch, to temporarily stop enforcing the taboo. Instead, she will do that herself, she will stop him from saying something that will cause him harm, but won't hurt him as usual, hence she's just going to give him a gentle warning. In hindsight, she probably should have tried this sooner, but she still thought that this might help in his current situation. After all, it was a brief moment of peace for him. Let him have some fun.

That too was a mistake.

Chapter Text

Sighing deeply, Subaru accepted a glass from Al and, after another look at Emilia, hesitantly took a shot.

"Argh, crap! That's strong, what did you give me, Al?"

Subaru's first shot hit him like a speeding truck.

"Whiskey. Highest grade wheat whiskey."

Al "unintentionally" got him the strongest drink that he could find in here. He never really liked the stuff, but he thought that bro needed something stronger than the posh wine they served in here. So he arranged with one of the servants for something that could knock out a giant. Fortunately, one of the dead members of the Council of Ten had a rather large alcohol stash.

Subaru remembered that he had taken a shot of whiskey once before – during his second loop in Lugunica, Rom had given him a glass to calm his nerves. Compared to the watered-down shot from the slum dweller, the one he got here was much stronger. It had a rather nice aftertaste, though.

"Ah, shit, I'm gonna have a headache tomorrow."

"Natsuki-san?"

"Yes, Otto?"

"That's a strong reaction. Have you ever tried alcohol before?"

"Yeah, I have, who are you taking me for? A year ago, me, Rem and Emilia got blackout drunk at a party. It was a fun evening. Rem and Emilia-tan looked really funny back then."

There was that time in the slums, but since it was during the failed loop, he did not mention it. Nor did he not mention the scene he remembered the most back during the festival, when the two drunk girls leaned against each other in the most unintentionally erotic way possible, for obvious reasons.

"Ah, those were the days..."

"Subaru-u-u!"

The embarrassed half-elf did not want everyone to hear how stupid she looked back then. Felt, however, was curious:

"Oh? So, how well can Nee-chan hold her drink?"

"She holds it good for a bit, but she gets addicted to it quickly, causing her to go other-board. She's "funny drunk" type of person, a really cute one at that. You know, the type that clings to you, while mumbling something only she can understand. Very cute, very E.M.T."

"Subaru-u-u-u-u-u!" "How could he do this! Why did he betray my trust so easily!"

"Sorry, Emilia-tan, that's what you get for stabbing me in the back like that."

"Still, that's re-e-ealy embarrassing, you dunderhead! I'm not telling people how you cried your eyes out on my lap, mister!"

Understandably, the half-elf was pouting at this. It had no effect on Subaru, however, since he found her pouting adorable.

"What about you, Subaru-sama?"

Crusch, who asked that question, found it difficult to join this party due to her situation, even though she felt a bit better thanks to Subaru's previous efforts. Still, she insisted on coming at least for a little while to talk with others.

Instead of him, his contracted spirit answered:

"Betty's Subaru is a very resilient drinker, I suppose. He can drink a lot in one go and still be mostly unaffected. He just gets a lot more talkative and loses some of his filter, in fact. Albeit he doesn't have much of a filter in the first place. However, after reaching a certain limit, he will crash on the ground unconscious until the next day."

Given she was the only person here who witnessed the fabled events of the party a year ago (and wasn't blackout drunk), everyone present accepted Beatrice's words.

Subaru felt betrayed once again:

"I have a filter, I swear."

-----

In the meantime, Emilia decided to ask Al something that caught her attention just prior to her knight took his first drink:

"Al-san, can I ask you something?"

"Of course, how can I help?"

"Are you and Subaru from the same place?"

"Um, you could say that."

Al scratched his helmet nervously.

"May I ask where that is?"

"Far away to the east! Oh, would you look at that! My glass is empty. I re-e-eally should get a refill."

Al replied so hastily that he inadvertently picked up on one of Emilia's well-known mannerisms.

Reinhard, who predictably overheard that exchange, began to wonder. During their first meeting in the alley, when he had saved him from Rachins, Camberley and Gaston, Subaru had said something similar - "a county to the east". To the Sword Saint , it seemed as if those two were truly born in the same place. This must have been an idiom back where they were born. If his Divine Protection of Language Comprehension was correct, it meant something like "a mysterious place far away", or at least something similar.

"Just dodged a bullet."

"Yeah."

Al and Subaru nodded in a mutual understanding. Explaining the nature of the multiverse and how they both got here, was long and tedious.

"Hm, Subaru said he was from beyond the Great Waterfall…"

"Emilia-sama, with all due respect, I believe Natsuki-san was merely joking back then."

The people around them shared Otto's theory. It made sense. People who claimed to have come from beyond the Great Waterfall were eccentric liars at best, and insane madmen at worst. Subaru seemed to fit the first description, rather than the second (hah, sure thing, Otto). In the meantime, Emilia's knight had enough smarts left in him not to not clarify that "beyond the Great Waterfall", "a country to the east", "parallel world" and "Earth, Japan" meant the same thing. Else they would have been stuck in an hour-long discussion.

"What's a "bullet"?"

Julius had never heard such a word before and it incited his curiosity. During the short time that he was alongside Subaru, he heard a lot of these weird mannerisms.

Reinhard wanted to explain the idiom – it meant "narrowly avoiding something bad" – but chose not to be a party pooper.

"Something faster than you and definitely slower than Reinhard."

"Is there even anything that is faster than Reinhard?"

"Eh, light, probably, I think he's hypersonic. There are some fictional characters that can outrun him."

"Yeah, light makes sense. Still bullshit tho."

"Yep."

Subaru and Al both agreed, that the Sword Saint's abilities were a bit bullshit (ironic coming from two time travelers).

"I'm certain that there are people faster than me. There are, surely..."

Reinhard tried to humble himself once again. He really wanted to believe it, as he knew of only one person who could almost match his speed – the First Divine General of the Vollachian Empire, Cecilus Segmunt.

"It's unbelievable just how powerful you are, man."

Al was still in disbelief that someone like Reinhard actually existed. Subaru, however, had seen him fight three times at this point and already accepted that he would never be able to ever win against him in a straight-up fight. However, he might be able to outwit him with a liberal use of Return by Death.

"Well, Reinhard is said to be the most powerful of the Sword Saints."

Julius considered Reinhard was the most powerful person who had ever lived. He was glad to be friends with him. Although right now his friendship with Subaru was the only thing he had left now that Gluttony had taken his name, not even his spirits remembered him.

"With all these Divine Protections? No wonder. Dude's probably the strongest person in this world."

"Eh, Satella is probably evenly matched with him. It's an immovable object and an unstoppable force kinda thing."

Subaru, for whatever reason, chose to defend Satella in their powerscaling discussion. Their relationship was kinda difficult, but he was the only one who had personally bore witness just how strong she truly was, while others here only knew her from legends.

Some people in the ballroom raised their eyebrows at such a casual mention of the Witch of Envy, but, nonetheless, they silently agreed with his assessment. If anyone was capable of giving the Sword Saint a run for his money, it was definitely the Witch.

"Still, Al, I do agree. Rein does feel a bit stupid at times. Seriously! Divine Protection of Phoenix? What a way to s-..."

Suddenly, time halted around Subaru. Despite his inebriation, the sensation of frozen time and familiar presence around him sobered him up a bit as he instinctively braced himself for the incoming punishment. But instead of familiar pain:

"I love you."

A gentle whisper touched his ears as a pair of beautiful hands wrapped around his torso from behind. He felt warm, he felt appreciated, he felt loved... And the next moment it was gone, no pain, no suffering, just a sweet aftertaste of her presence. Time continued. He immediately turned around and looked first at Emilia, then at Beako, then at Garfiel and Otto, then at everyone else in that order. The last time something like this had happened, he had killed Emilia with his own stupidity. Noticing that everyone was still breathing, he exhaled.

"Sorry… I was just a bit down…"

Subaru murmured to himself, thanking Satella for her mercy. Her brief presence had an odd effect on him, something he had never experienced before:

"I miss you, Tella."

His heart yearned for her presence once more. He wanted to be with her like he used to, to hold her close like he used to, to watch the stars with her like they used to, to dedicate his very being to her like he used to. It was as if something deep inside him had suddenly awakened and began searching for its missing piece, something that made him feel incomplete, both back home and here, in this reality. Her.

"What was that, Subaru?"

Reinhard was quite worried when he noticed the depressed look on the normally cheerful knight's face. Subaru was one of the few people who treated him like, well, Reinhard. Yes, he called him a monster once or twice, but it did not feel like an insult or a curse in his direction, compared to when his father or grandfather had told him that.

Beatrice noticed a sharp rise in her contractor's smell. Something weird had occurred, she was sure of it. She found no trace of emotional distress in her contractor, just an odd melancholy.

Fortunately, no one noticed that Al nearly spilled his drink when he realized the meaning of Subaru's suddenly interrupted comment. If not for his helmet, everyone would have definitely seen his surprised expression. Really, his appreciation for that piece of armor was growing more and more.

"Fucking hell, you're gonna give me a heart attack, bro!"

Subaru smiled again, hiding his dejected expression as he used to. The feeling of yearning never went away, but at least he could manage it.

"Must be fun to never have to worry about your own mortality…"

No one but Al noticed the irony of this statement.

Subaru poured another shot of whiskey and took another sip without any hesitation. After all, it seemed that both Satella and the Witch were rather kind to him today. He might as well have some fun while he's at it.

Chapter Text

In just an hour, Subaru had managed to down his second bottle of whiskey. They were quite large bottles too. At this point, even Beatrice was surprised by his alcohol tolerance. Last time he folded a lot sooner.

"His tolerance has improved massively in a year, just like his physical abilities, I suppose. As expected from Betty's Subaru, in fact."

Initially, Subaru promised himself only one drink and no more. However, between Satella allowing him to relax (she prevented him from spilling his secrets four times thus far: "Thanks, Tella. Lov' you, hun"), and Emilia, egged on by Echidna, offering him more and more to drink, Subaru's truly did give in to peer pressure.

-----

All of the Royal Candidates were quite curious about Subaru, as he rarely spoke about himself, even the proud Priscilla was interested, who found him more entertaining than her own jester. After the spirit that possessed the Merchant Princess explained to Emilia how a drunken Subaru could hopefully help clear up the mysteries surrounding him, the half-elf somewhat begrudgingly obliged ("It might be a bit unfair to do that to my knight, though...") to assist the possessed merchant in her efforts.

As it turned out, the drunk Subaru was even more eccentric than the sober one. He stumbled around, bumped into tables when he went for refills, and kept constantly apologizing to someone under his nose. Echidna did not know to whom exactly, but he was oddly tender toward this imaginary person, for whatever reason. ("Is he hearing voices inside his head? Maybe it's just a sign of inebriation.") Initially, the partygoers had been content to watch and laugh, while Anastasia-Echidna had gone right to work, attempting to gain any useful information from the drunken knight. So far, she had been unsuccessful. To her seemingly throwaway question about him organizing the White Whale subjugation expedition, Subaru, in his drunken state, vigorously praised Rem, a person who, according to Emilia's words, was a maid of Mathers' estate that was devoured by Gluttony. Subaru was the only person who remembered her, the only person who remembered victims of Gluttony that lost their names, which was yet another oddity about him. He claimed that if Rem hadn't helped him, he would've run away from Lugunica and given up on Emilia altogether. Those were rather touching words, but useless ones, all things considered, since his loyalty to his liege was now absolute, something he did not forget to redeclare. The only useful thing she managed to learn was that the fabled metia that helped in subjugation of the White Whale was likely a family heirloom – he said he had it "from the day one". Unfortunately, Russell Fellow was currently in possession of this valued item as a part of their deal. Subaru said it was probably worth around twenty holy gold coins, which sounded rather cheap, but fox spirit knew that Russell, as a collector, would value it much higher than that.

Among the stream of rather useless information were the things he was chatting about with Al about: most of them seemed beyond her understanding, probably some sort of local references, since they were from the same place, but some of them included things like food preferences, and other mostly irrelevant things like that. Honestly, Echidna paid very little attention to their banter.

"So what do you like the best here, bro? From the food, I mean."

"I like the bu-u-urgers here, Hoshin's "invention", no doubt. Pretentious je-e-erk, snagged all the cool things. Me-e-eat is rather good here, ve-e-ery tender, probably good ecology or somthin'. The tea sucks, though, or maybe it's just that Ram is the wo-o-orst maid in existence. Nah, it's de-e-efinitely Ram's fault – when it's Petra, Rem or Fred it's ok. I was surpri-i-ised there's so little rice or fish food in here, but I guess that's just the asian in me speakin'."

"Not a lot of deep water here, so fish is a rare delicacy. And it's all river fish, too, given, you know, no seas in here."

"Makes sense. I was also surprised by the lack of mayo. Se-e-eriously, it was to-o-orture!"

The inebriated knight placed a hand over his heart in the most overly dramatic fashion possible.

"I had to re-invent the stuff with Rem and Ram. Most people in the ma-a-ansion liked it. Still not perfect. Needs to be better. Maybe add whiskey? Haven't tried that, yet." What a madman.

"Don't really like the mayo."

"Gasp! You're no longer my bud, Al. No more bud privileges. Na-ah. Gone. Poof!"

"Ah, don't be like that, bro. Everyone has their own taste."

"Cool to see that okonomiyaki made it too, even if Beako and Emilia-tan can't cook for shi-i-it. Hate that your bitch ruined such a co-o-ol bonding scene, tho."

Reinhard and Wilhelm looked rather guilty. It did not help that they had the second argument after facing Theresia.

At the same time, said bitch just turned in Subaru's direction.

"What are you gonna do, bimbo? Stab me with your toothpick in the middle of the party? I'm sure half of the people here would want your head for that. You've already done your worst, it won't faze me anyway."

Of course, he was still rather mad at her, both for ruining his attempts to mend the rift in the Astrea family and for humiliating him in a failed loop by forcing him to prostrate himself before her and then beating him up on a whim, not to mention the whole "appa incident".

Priscilla was surprisingly civil. She could appreciate his honest hostility, they were enemies after all, and there was no deceitful "respect" in his words, unlike in what others told. She preferred people like that to those who groveled. And the commoner was right that half of the party would turn against her in such a case.

"Ayo, man. Not cool. I'm not bad-mouthing your chick."

"I dunno how you handle her. Emilia's one bi-i-ig pain in the ass, but compared to yo-o-ours – Angel."

"Hah, she can be a handful sometimes. What can I say, I love to play with fire."

"Aldebaran."

"Sure-sure, Princess. I'll shut up."

Emilia had mixed feelings about Subaru right now. On the one hand, he stood up to Priscilla, which was honestly quite cool of him, but on the other, his comments about her were also rather rude.

"But I was the one that pressured him to drink in the first place... Maybe it's because I am so mean to him, he's so... brash. And I've always created so much trouble for him..."

Filled with guilt, she decided to stop encouraging him to drink more.

-----

Emilia's refusal to continue further did not make Subaru drink less, unfortunately, as Otto had quickly replaced her, almost forcing the alcohol down Subaru's throat and goading the black-haired boy into doing embarrassing things that he could exploit later. Garfiel barely paid attention to his Captain, as he and Mimi shared another glass with their arms intertwined. Sadly for Subaru, who told them about this drinking tradition, he did not get the chance to do so with Emilia, although not because she found it weird or embarrassing, but because she decided to abstain from drinking for the rest of the evening. When Garfiel did pay attention, he shouted in support, loudly proclaiming that Subaru was "Da coolest guy evar!". So did Mimi, in that regard, truly the power of Lolimancer at hand.

Even Julius, Reinhard, and Felix had gotten involved.

Felix quickly became drunk, trying to drown out the feelings of self-loathing he felt for allowing Crusch to be infected with the cursed dragon blood and having no clear way to treat her from it. At least Subaru could help, but that did not felt good either. In his opinion, they were already owed Emilia Camp far too much (they had cooperated quite a lot in the past year), and having someone else's knight treat Crusch's affliction felt incredibly humiliating to the one who was commonly called the greatest healer in all of Lugunica.

The former two were simply curious to see how a drunk Subaru would act. ubaru was already quite eccentric, so how would he act when alcohol was added to the mix? Even more eccentric, as it turned out.

Julius was a bit afraid that he would have to duel Subaru again, and given the fact that his ladies had forgotten him, it seemed that the nasty-eyed knight alongside his contracted Great Spirit of Yin would have a lot greater chances than during their mutually embarrassing display in the capital. He still had great chances to win the theoretical bout, but a rather big part of him wanted to give Subaru his victory. The knight still berated himself for having treated him poorly back then, and he hoped that Subaru does consider him his friend, even if a bit begrudgingly. His state was rather unknightly at the moment, but Felix looked the same way, so Julius did not judge. Besides, plenty of Royal Knights were drunkards as well, and Emilia's knight had to be convinced by the entire party to let loose.

Reinhard was there mostly at the insistence of his liege. Although, he was rather concerned about his friend's well-being . Right now Subaru was clearly the most inebriated person in the party, surpassing the drinking pace of both Al, Otto, Wilhelm and even Heinkel. The whiskey bottles were a bit smaller than the wine bottles, yes, but given the alcohol content, Subaru was clearly drinking a lot more alcohol. Considering what Great Spirit-sama said, he had a hard limit, after which his body and mind would give in. Therefore, the Sword Saint chose to stay by his side, so that he can at least catch him when that happens.

"Just in case."

"His tolerance is a bit ridiculous, nyah. Do you think you'll byeat him in a drinking contest, Reinhard?"

"I don't think I am qualified to attend that kind of contest, Felix. I am immune to the effects of alcohol after all…"

Sword Saint was a bid dejected by the atmosphere. He drank a bit, yes, but he always missed the fun aspect of drinking.

-----

"Yo-o-ou're too op ma-a-an!"

With each drink, Subaru steadily complained more and more. The previous powerscaling discussion was still stuck in his head. He had Tella, true, but Return by Death felt like a double-edged sword most of the time.

Sword Saint, in the meantime, was beginning to feel more and more down. From his perspective, the two of them felt like complete opposites: Subaru always did a lot for someone who was naturally given very little, while he himself felt like he did very little compared to just how much was given to him.

"I'm not strong, Subaru, all I possess are nothing but tricks."

He did not mean "strong", as in physically strong ("Being a monster, I have that in spades."), but rather "strong", as in being able to protect those who couldn't protect themselves. That was his biggest issue, since even the kingdom where he lived restricted what he could do and who he could help. Technically, the day he helped Subaru protect Lady Emilia he violated several rules in doing so, but given he helped save two Royal Candidates that day, no one took notice. That was the main reason he served Lady Felt, so he could lend a hand to whomever needed it, once the old rules will be dismantled. Although in that case, he would just like to have a peaceful, idyllic life somewhere far away from the chaos of the cities.

"I can't even draw my sword, Reid, unless it deems its opponent worthy, see?"

Reinhard tried to draw his sword to show him the impossibility of this action. The scabbard moved with the sword, almost as if they were fused together, making it impossible to retrieve it. At least he could still bash with it.

"It rarely deems anyone worthy, but I guess I should be happy about it. After all, the people who can get it to react tend to be incredibly troublesome individuals."

The fact that Reid rarely deemed anyone worthy also meant that there wasn't anyone who could be a great threat to the well-being of the world, and that, from Sword Saint's point of view, was a good thing. ("Albeit this logic is not flawless either, as people like Regulus Corneas and Elsa Granhiert were not considered worthy despite their disturbing nature. Still, I prefer to think that my efforts were not needed to subjugate such monsters, and that someone else could have accomplished it better than I ever could. Like Natsuki Subaru and Garfiel Tinzel.") Reinhard, knowing his monstrous nature, did not believe he was worthy to stand against someone who threatened the entire world. Unlike his friend, who would probably find a lot more use of this "gift", if he had it.

"Ho-o-old up! Let me try!"

For a second, Sword Saint thought that Subaru had read his mind. In truth, no one had asked him for something like that. He hesitated for a moment before he shrugged his shoulders and detached the sheath from his suit once more.

"What's the worst that could happen?" You have no idea.

"Sure, Subaru, here."

Subaru approached Reinhard (bumping into the leg of another table yet again on the way there) and grabbed the handle of the sword. As soon as he placed his hand upon the blade, Subaru's eyes widened slightly. For some reason, the handle felt somewhat familiar to him, as if something deep inside his soul already knew what he was doing. It reminded him of Satella. This was similar to the odd affection that he felt when he met her face to face for the first time a year ago. Or maybe it was like what he felt recently – another missing piece of himself?

"I'm telling you, Reid, this is gonna be the funniest prank ever!"

Thinking nothing of it, Subaru began to pull.

Instantly, Reinhard heard an all-too-familiar sound, a sound that he never thought his ears would pick up on, especially in this situation: the soft click of the scabbard allowing the swordsman to unsheathe the blade within. Reinhard's surprise was so great that for a moment his shock became visible on his otherwise always inscrutable face. Similarly shocked, were two others, who had personally witnessed that blade being wielded just a few days ago: for the first it was against his wife, for the second – against his mother.

"Subaru-u-u, you dunderhead! Stop embarrassing... me..."

Emilia stopped her scolding immediately, her eyes wide in complete disbelief as she began to realize the unbelievable scene that was unfolding before her.

At first, everyone ignored Subaru's antics, expecting him to fall on his ass, since they expected him to try and fail to pull out the fabled Dragon Sword. However, in a move that would change the course of history forever, something truly incredible happened before them. Under the eyes of everyone in the room, the sword started to exit from its scabbard. At that moment, everyone's minds went blank at the sheer impossibility of what was happening in front of them. Even the drunken Al, the ever-playful Felix, the nerdy Julius, and even Garfiel and Mimi (who had been preoccupied with one another during the initial commotion) could only stop and stare in disbelief. Even Heinkel, who had previously been in a drunken stupor, woke up completely sober with his jaw hanging wide open. The room fell utterly silent. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. With a final grunt, Subaru pulled the Reid out, ignoring the stunned reactions of everyone around him.

"Huh, I feel like King Arthur after he pulled out the Excalibur."

There was a smug grin on Subaru's face. Of course, only Al understood the reference.

The weapon in his hands was the epitome of perfection. Its blade was so clean that even dust refused to settle on it. The edge glowed faintly, reflecting the light coming from the mana crystals placed around the room. The air surrounding it whistled as it moved, humming a melody of death to whoever faced the wielder.

With a swift motion, too swift for what was expected of him, Subaru turned around to the recent offender – a table he had just recently bumped into, raised a blade and with a single swoosh… turned the entirety of said table, alongside all its contents, into a pile of fine dust. It was a perfect strike, the technique was so clean that even Reinhard himself completely approved it. For a brief moment, it looked like he had achieved true perfection, worthy of the Sword God's blessing. The move reminded the Sword Saint of his own blow against the Bowel Hunter a year ago. However, unlike him, who had blown up the loot house but failed to kill the intended target, Subaru was a lot more merciless, his strike way more concentrated on the objective, leaving almost nothing left of his "mortal enemy".

"And fuck you too, table. I swe-e-ear, these things are worse than Ju-u-ulius."

If Julius hadn't been paralyzed by the event, he would probably have been hurt by those words.

"Ha! I knew you were bullshittin', Rein!"

-----

"Woah, Envy, look how cool he is!"

Back in her Garden, Satella squeaked like a giddy schoolgirl watching her crush show off. In truth, that assessment was somewhat correct.

-----

There was a moment of silence at the party. Some people looked at the blade in his hand, some at the pile of dust where the unfortunate table used to be, but no one ushered a word. Subaru looked around, utterly confused.

"Wha- why are you so quiet all of a su-u-udden? I-i-is there somethin' on my face?"

He touched his face, leaning on Reid as if it were a worthless stick and not the legendary weapon revered by the entire world that it was. Had Reid Astrea been here, he would certainly have approved. As everyone continued to stare, he opened the cork of another bottle of whiskey and began to drink it straight from the bottle. After downing about half in one go, he stopped and replaced the still-open bottle with a loud thud.

And so, in her reckless greed, the Great Spirit Echidna just unleashed the full power of the black-eyed knight, thus changing the flow of history forevermore.

Chapter Text

Gradually, everyone came back to their senses, and there was a single question on everyone's mind:

"What in the actual fuck?"

Some voiced that question out loud, some did not even try to avoid swearing.

"Is...is everyone seeing this?"

Crusch thought she was having a fever dream, courtesy of the cursed blood in her veins.

For the Finest of Knights, the entire foundation of his worldview was turned upside down:

"Subaru... how… how are you holding the Dragon Sword?"

"With my ha-a-ands of coz."

One of the things that Echidna noticed was that the wasted Subaru spoke with a rather messy Kararagi accent.

"So he might be a Prince of Vollachia, exiled to Kararagi, perhaps because of his Gusteko roots? What if he was born out of an affair with someone from there?" Aim higher, she-fox, this man is dating a living calamity.

The purple-haired knight just stared at him, contemplating whether or not to retort. After a brief consideration, he decided to bite his tongue, not wanting to end up just like that unlucky table. After all, he had just recently thought that Subaru might lunge at him with his fists should he taunt him too much, so with Reid in hand, he might just vaporize him in anger.

"Ima-a-agine bein' called the Finest of Knights and not even knowin' how to hold a fuckin' swo-o-ord! Prick. Felt nice beatin' me with some stick, hu-u-uh!? What no-o-ow, punk!?"

Although he was taller than Subaru usually was, Julius looked really small to the black-eyed knight right now. The latter was glad that Subaru was just showing off, as he had noticed the unnatural speed of his movements when he wielded Reid. If he was actually mad at him, the Finest would probably have met his end already.

"I thought an average person can not pull out the Dragon Sword, how is this possible!?"

"How did you do it, Nii-chan!?"

"Does this mean that Subaru-dono is a Sword Saint as well?"

Everyone had started to question him all at once, the voices ringing in his ears annoyingly.

"A-A-AH! SHUT THE FUCK U-U-UP! UR GIVIN' ME A HEADACHE!"

Swoosh! Another table paid for its insolence, this time with a loud boom instead. The room fell silent once again. Reinhard noted the incredible presence that his voice held. Surprisingly, even completely inebriated Subaru still had a potent gift of influencing the people around him. He was truly a great leader, after all, just recently, Subaru had given an inspiring speech, that had rallied the people of Priestella, something the Sword Saint could not really hope to achieve. No, Rein, it's not charisma, people just don't want to be vaporized.

Emilia broke the silence:

"Subaru, did you know you could do that?"

The half-elf, who had asked her knight, did not believe that he did, otherwise he would have no doubt had it during their first meeting. The thought of him saving her from the Bowel Hunter, Dragon Sword in hand, made Emilia a little giddy. ("He would have been so cool! Even cooler than he was back then.") Subaru would've begged to differ, but she felt that he was quite cool back then.

"Of coz not, Emilia-tan! This is a-a-all news to me! If I had fuckin' known I could pull it out, it woulda been a hol lot e-e-easier..."

A hint of familiar melancholy returned to the scary-eyed knight.

"Is it possible that Subaru-dono is a descendant of Reid Astrea?"

Wilhelm hoped for that to be the case, overjoyed at the prospect of the black-haired lad being part of his family. After all, Subaru was already an honorary grandson to him.

"Nope! I ca-a-an assure you all that the descendant of that guy. I'm not even a redhead. And I'm pre-e-etty sure that there are like ze-e-ero ikemen genes in me."

Subaru stated that as a matter of fact, pointing at his messy black hair. Satella, observing him, disagreed with the last bit – in her opinion, he was very hot, especially with no shirt, and even more so with no pants, and even hotter with no underwear. Yep, she was definitely a peeper, even prior to all this mess.

"How can you be so sure about that, Subaru-kyun?"

Felix knew a thing or two about having unexpected traits from a forgotten ancestor, after all, he was born demi-human to two human parents and was shunned for it.

"The tru-u-uth is, I don't have any ancestors here..."

"I'm certain that this is true. I can not sense any Divine Protections in Subaru, let alone the Divine Protection of a Sword Saint."

Reinhard informed the group this after using his Divine Protection of Judgment on Subaru (it allowed him to perceive Divine Protections of others), implying that he most likely wasn't a descendant of the First Sword Saint. He also knew that he was not lying about his lineage, meaning that even if he was Reinhard's lost relative, he did not know about it.

"It is only natural that Betty's Subaru can wield Reid's stick with ease."

"Phrasin', Beako... phrasin'. You make me sound like I'm some gay hoe in a cheap-ass bro-o-othel... I'm as straight as a... as a... urgh...can't find the word..."

"Reinhard-sama, what happens, or rather, what should have happened, if anyone without the Divine Protection of the Sword Saint touches the Dragon Sword?"

Otto knew that not everyone could wield weapons like Reid. They usually chose their owners, not the other way around.

"I have never seen anyone other than me and my grandmother try to wield it, but I think it's supposed to hurt the ones that it deems unworthy, making them unable to use it. I have found that even if the sword does not wish to be drawn, it can still be wielded in its scabbard as a blunt weapon."

"Is it possible that the sword wasn't properly sheathed, hence Subaru managed to pull it out?"

"No, Julius, otherwise I would have been able to pull it out beforehand."

"And you didn't just forget to shyeath it properly after you tried to pull it out, nyah?"

"Certainly not, Felix."

The Divine Protection of Perfect Recollection could not lie to him.

"Besides, it does not explain how Subaru is able to wield it to its utmost extent. The blade has its own will."

"Nah, Captain is so cool, he does not need yo stupid blessings! He just intimidates da sword into submission!"

"Garfiel, you can not intimidate an object."

"Captain can, Brotto, he can do a lot of things. Besides, ya heard da Sword Saint – da thin' got its own will."

Subaru paid zero attention to them as he was still trying to find the exact word that he wanted to say. Eventually, he moved on.

"Anyway, Beako. My-y-y type is a silver-haired half-elf with purple eyes. Oh, and a blue-haired oni with blue eyes, too. I'm no-o-ot into guys. I'm down to stand up for a homie, but not la-a-ay with the homie."

-----

"Ahm, Subaru, could you stop utilizing the Dragon Sword as a walking stick?"

Julius disapproved of such rough treatment of the relic as Subaru begun to slowly stumble back to his bottle. For the former Finest of Knights, the Sword Saint wielding the Dragon Sword Reid was an idol, at least during his early days. He knew, of course, that he would never reach the extent of mastery that his friend Reinhard possessed. That is not to say he didn't try to reach it, choosing to truly master himself in all things that he could, thus earning his title of Finest. Still, the little child, buried deep inside him, envied Subaru a bit.

"If he can wield it, maybe I can as well."

So he reached for the Dragon Sword in an attempt to seize it for himself. Surprisingly, the half-elf's knight showed no resistance, only stumbling a bit after losing his balance. The purple-haired knight's eyes blinked in the excitement at the honor of holding the weapon that was used by the legendary Reid Astrea four centuries ago. Julius had to seriously exert himself to keep his noble composure and not let his inner nerd take control.

"Huh, the Dragon Sword feels heavier than it looks. Reinhard obviously wields it with no issues. But given Subaru's body composition, I expected it to be lighter."

Of course, he will return the sword to its original owner, he only wished to inspect it for a bit. However, when Julius was inspecting both the handle and an edge of the fabled blade, it not only started to feel even heavier than before, but he also suddenly felt a sharp pain in his hands.

"A-a-a-gh!"

The Sword shot out of his hands and returned back to its "true owner" (not to Reinhard, weirdly enough).

"Julius, what happened? Are you alright?"

Reinhard worried about his friend safety, while habitually blaming himself in his thoughts for his carelessness.

"I am...alright…"

Knight's body showed no signs of injury, but the pain still resonated in his soul. It felt like he had just been beaten senseless by the Reid Astrea himself.

"It seems that Subaru really has the special ability to handle the Dragon Sword." "And I am not qualified for it."

As Julius was answering Reinhard, Felix hurried to them and started to check up on him to know if he really was fine, all the while easing any pain he might still be feeling with his magic.

"Well, that certainly proves the pain theory about the blade choosing its owner."

Wilhelm wondered if he could wield the Dragon Sword as he had once defeated the previous Sword Saint – his wife Theresia – in a duel before. He knew that he was far from the apex of swordsmanship, but he felt, that the new owner was even further from it, prior to the acquisition. Still, he was curious: if that was the case and he could draw the Reid, if his grandson was not able to pull it out on the whim, would he be able to? Why was Subaru-dono the unique exception?

-----

"Hold on, let Betty see."

"It is fine, Gryeat Spirit-Sama, I can treat Julius-kyun."

"Urgh, I'm not interested in the stupid knight, the sword."

"I'd be careful, Beatrice-Sama, you saw what happened to Julius."

"I am not shortsighted enough to touch it, I suppose. Betty just wants to try something."

She reached for the Reid, but instead of touching it:

"Betty is going to pour some of her contractor's mana into it. If Betty's theory is correct, it should resonate. Everyone, close your eyes."

The people immediately did as she told. Well, everyone except Emilia's wasted knight.

Beatrice had experience wielding similar artifact already, or at least something that she thought was similar in nature – the metia that she and Felt used against Lye Batenkaitos. Reid was likely simply amplifying the effects of mana usage. The only difference being that the Dragon Sword was an actual weapon and delivered its mana directly. It clearly reacted positively to her contractor's mana, as even without functioning gate, it allowed him to perform superhuman feats. She wondered just how much it could do if she poured his mana directly into it .

For a brief moment she thought she was wrong, but then:

"Agh!"

The flash was so bright that it burned through eyelids. Along with it came a loud boom that caused the people around her stumble. The glass in the ballroom shattered from the sheer impact. Most of the mana crystals in the room turned off for a few seconds, only to reignite again.

"God da-a-ammit, Beako! Don't tinker with the thin', or you gonna render me bli-i-ind!"

"Betty poured very little mana into it. I suppose, the contractor's mana is a particularly effective catalyst. Does someone want to try the same to confirm it?"

In the meantime, she cast a simple healing spell to help her contractor's eyes.

"Mhm, I can."

Emilia volunteered. At first, she thought that nothing had happened. She thought, that her mana had simply been got sucked into it.

"Slow down, in fact. You already poured ten times more than Betty did."

"But maybe I can still make it..." "...react."

Before she could finish a sentence, the blade did react – her right arm (the one she used to inject mana) began to freeze at a rapid pace.

"Ah!"

She immediately stopped the mana transfer and began to shake her half-frozen hand in panic. Her contracted lesser spirits swarmed around her and began to treat her to prevent hypothermia.

"Phew. That was re-e-ealy close!"

"So it did react, it just threw your mana back at you, tenfold. The same happened to the knight, I suppose. Sword Saint, can you do the same trick?"

At her request, Reinhard did as she asked. After concentrating a tiny portion of mana on the blade, he pulled back. The result was rather disappointing, but at least there was no feedback:

"It barely glows, even though I utilized around the same amount of mana you used, Beatrice-sama."

"So it is what I thought it was."

"What does that mean, Beatrice-sama?"

"Well, you said that the sword has its own will, isn't that right, Sword Saint?"

"I did. It chooses the opponents against whom I can draw it."

"Betty believes that the weapon was made with a fragment of the soul. It is the reason for its selectivity."

"A soul? Who's?"

"Well, given the name, it should only be the First Sword Saint, I suppose."

"But why the reaction was so different to my mana, Subaru's, and Reinhard's?"

"You should spend more time learning about the nature of magic, girl. When your gate absorbs mana from the world around you, said mana does not actually remain the same, in fact. Your Od influences it, changes it."

"Wait, so if Subaru's mana is reeealy effective, does that mean..."

"...that da Captain's soul is aligned with Reid Astrea's?!"

Garfiel interjected, finishing the half-elf's question.

"Eh, sounds 'bout right. We pro-o-obably were drinkin' buddies!" Right on target, Subaru.

Ever since the events of the Sanctuary, he acknowledged the fact that there might be a hole in his memories. It started with Tella mentioning the reasons why she loved him – they did not feel like a lies or a delusions to him, but at the same time they did not make sense, given his memories. Since he arrived in the same state that he left the convenience store in, he likely wasn't transported prior to the fateful meeting with Emilia and forgot about the fact. And this implied that this was at least the second time he was in this world. The first was around four centuries ago and likely involved Tella, other Six ("They acted in such a way, that they probably knew me before."), and given the legends, Flugel, Reid, and Volcanica as well. The second began a year ago.

Of course, no one took Subaru's words seriously. They should have.

-----

After another gulp of whiskey, Subaru had a sudden idea.

"Ayo, redhead! Yeah, you 'scilla, you dumb busty black widow!"

The one addressed raised an eyebrow at his insults, but chose not to retort. After all, she could not even call him a commoner anymore, given the Dragon Sword in his hand. Silently she approached him, curious what the drunkard knight had in his mind.

"I wanna check somthin', get your swo-o-ord out."

Of course, she realized immediately what he had in mind. Without any hesitation, she drew the Yang Sword and then presented it before the commoner.

"It would be the most amusing if it were true."

Dropping Reid like a child discarding a toy he was bored off, Subaru took the Yang Sword with both hands.

"I don't want your daughters, you noisy-ass tyrant, Tella's the hottest chick around! Gimme your coolest sword instead!"

The knight raised it effortlessly and swoosh… a swing didn't physically hit anything, but another table just went up in flames. Fortunately, Subaru did not put too much of his will into the swing, otherwise he could have caused an inferno. The servants quickly tried to extinguish the flames, hoping to save the contents of the unfortunate table, but they were not fast enough. Those who were proficient in the art of sword-wielding noticed that Subaru possessed the same supernatural speed as when he wielded Reid.

Now Subaru casually wielding the second legendary blade wasn't as surprising to the partygoers as the first one, still it made others silent yet again. Liliana began to rapidly write the lyrics of her new song about him. She did it with a piece of strawberry on a napkin in a broken I-script, but still, given her inebriation, it was a good effort.

Having satisfied his curiosity, Subaru effortlessly dismissed the blade. Priscilla began to laugh maniacally, clearly incredibly amused by the situation.

"A drunken commoner with two of the strongest blades in hand, against the whole world, pha-ha-hah."

"Si-i-ick, I wonder if there are any mo-o-ore swords I could try out!"

"Cecilus Segmunt the Blue Lightning wields two more legendary blades – the Fiend Sword Murasame and the Dream Sword Masayume, the locations of the other swords are unknown to me."

Julius knew about all of them, of course, he liked ancient legends. He had heard that the Life Sword was somewhere in Lugunica, but he did not know not exactly where. Thankfully, he recovered from his attempt to seize Reid.

"Wow… sounds co-o-ol. After party in Vollachia, anyone?"

"Ahem, Subaru, can you return the sword to Priscilla?"

Emilia did not want to be indebted to the Sun Princess. She was still a tiny bit afraid of her, truth be told.

"'Tis not needed, half-wit, your knight has been deemed worthy by the Yang Sword, hence it is his now."

Telling that, Priscilla drew her own copy of the famed weapon. Looking at her, Subaru drew his own as well, then crossed the two playfully, just as if he was participating in a fencing match.

"Ni-i-ice."

"And what happens if a person is deemed unworthy?"

"It burns their soul 'til nothing is left."

That had left a greater impact than the fact that Subaru was worthy of the blade in the first place, as the danger of Subaru's antics finally reached the attendees. Only Subaru and Priscilla were utterly unconcerned by this.

"Eh, there are worse ways to di-i-ie." "Being eaten alive, for one."

Subaru could mention a couple others too: experiencing two deaths at once – death by suffocation and death by cardiac arrest due to "fear resonance", like he experienced against Sirius, or being gutted by the Elsa, or dying slowly due to mana deprivation from the Wolgarm curse, or being betrayed by the people you trust, or being frozen solid and slowly chipped apart bit by bit by the Beast of the End, or witnessing the deaths of the people you care about prior to your own violent end. Truth be told, he had not had any pleasant deaths during his adventures, the most calm one was when he died in his sleep during the first stay at the Mathers' mansion, and even then, the sensation of losing the relationships that he had built over the course of his first loop there felt devastating.

The people around him were a bit perturbed by his recklessness, yet no one chose to scold him for it. Not even Emilia, as an image of Subaru with two swords at his back atop of his legendary black steed (Patrasche) crossed her mind. She felt something trembling in her stomach at the thought.

Only one person was grinning at this:

"Hah! Definitely! A Prince of Vollachia!"

-----

"So, Lady Beatrice, I don't suppose you can explain that?"

"Hm, it's probably the same thing, merchant boy."

"The same, as in he's a drinking buddy of both the long-dead Reid Astrea and someone whose soul went into the Yang Sword?"

"Urgh, maybe not a "drinking buddy". The fact remains that his affinity for these is a result of the Od resonance."

"And what about others? Murasame and Masayume?"

"We can only try and see, I suppose."

Chapter Text

With the Dragon Sword back in his one hand and the Yang Sword in another, the black-haired knight, while still in his drunken stupor, could feel the immense power coursing through him. He felt that he could easily atomize the Bowel Hunter, slice the White Whale in half, obliterate the Sin Archbishop of Sloth, and wipe out all the Great Rabbit with but a single slash. In truth, this assessment was more or less correct, since if he had actually put all of his mana into a single strike with those two, he could level about two-thirds of Priestella.

All of this was such a cruel joke. He remembered how that when he first arrived here, he wanted a typical Isekai adventure with some absurd superpower, a hot princess and some instant fame while he was at it. Anything to distract him from the shame he felt back home. Well, he had been given an absurd superpower – Return by Death certainly counted, he had met a hot princess, although she found Emilia more of the "cute girl" type, and he had been given fame. The Fate certainly had a sense of humor.

If only he had but a fraction of the power he had right now just a year prior. No, even just a fraction of that fraction of that fraction. He could have done better, he could have faced up to the unspeakable horrors that he lived (died) through. If only he had it, then his friends, his allies, his cute great spirit, the blue maid who adored him and the silver-haired girl from whom it had all begun, everyone he cared about… they would not be hurt, their corpses would not haunt him for his incompetence. With it, maybe then he would not have to painfully force Beako to stay silent about his unhealthy habits. Maybe then Rem would take part in the stories that he told her daily for the past year. Maybe then the confidence he displayed in front of the love of his life would not have to be fake. Maybe then Satella would not have to cry. Maybe then he would have been able to call himself a hero, not just Rem's hero, whatever that was worth now that he had lost her, but everyone's hero. Yes, a hero like Reinhard (in an ironic twist of Fate, the Sword Saint never considered himself one), not a fraud who abused the affection of the one person who loved him unconditionally. Just like he abused the affection that his parents showed him…

"I'm sorry, Mom, Dad..."

"Ma-a-an, I know this world's cruel, but it has to be fuckin' ironic too, hu-u-uh? Go fuck yourself, Fate-sama..."

Subaru's already blurred vision was made worse by the tears that began to form in his eyes.

"Subaru? Are you alright?"

The silver-haired half-elf was the first to act. Letting out a half laugh, half cry of anguish, the drunken boy turned to Emilia.

"...Hah... No-o-o, Emilia-tan, no-o-o... I'm not fi-i-ine, not when… not when I just found out that I'm even mo-o-ore worthless than I thought befo-o-ore! You kno-o-ow, I tried so hard… so-o-o hard, went through so-o-o fuckin' much tryin' to convince myself that there was nothin' I could do, that... that the outcome we have now is the best. I wa-a-anted to believe in it, I wa-a-anted to, so there's at least one Present..." "... where you do not die..." "But now, now I…"

Subaru mumbled his words, the thoughts were spilling out of his mind faster than he could voice them out loud. His body slumped to the floor as his speech jumbled together into an incomprehensible cry filled with self-flagellation. His tears streamed without end, not unlike the incessant calls of the corpses in his crumbling mind:

"Why did you not save me? Why did you abandon me during the trials?" Emilia's voice questioned him.

"Why did you not stay alive and leave us, Subaru-kun? I sacrificed myself so that you could live!" Rem chastised.

"Ever worthless, Barusu. You should have known that we can not beat the Bowel Hunter." Ram scoffed .

"Subaru, where are you? Scary cultists are attacking the village!" little Petra begged.

"Why did you call yo Witch, ya filthy cultist? I've lost everyone coz of ya!" Garfiel snarled at him.

"You wanted to feed me to the White Whale! Of course, I would ditch you!" Otto blamed.

"Thank you for allowing me to finally die." Beatrice muttered with a sad smile.

"That was quite a painful experience, Subaru-u-u-kun. It's most unfortunate that this-you were not enough." Roswaal said with a ever-familiar expression.

-----

To say that Emilia was shocked would be nothing less than a severe understatement. She had witnessed her knight crying before, once during his second day as a butter, once when he cried for Rem at Karsten Manor, but never to this extent. More than that, the way Subraru talked about himself, it was eerily similar to her own mindset at times. A feeling of her own incompetence, of her worthlessness was still present in her mind. That feeling had been at its worst during their time in the Sanctuary. Back then Emilia needed him to push her through the ordeal. She remembered being glad that he was angry with her, that he was frustrated by her noisiness, when he was clearly suffering the most, desperately trying to save both the Sanctuary and the Mansion from Roswaal's plots. Those feelings were never truly gone since then, and it did not help that the integrity of her Camp hinged so much on his efforts. Thanks to Subaru, however, she was able to improve herself, she strived to be better. Suddenly, Emilia understood that his obsessive training of both his body and working with Beatrice over the past year was due to the same thing she had – a desperate desire to improve oneself to feel more useful to others.

Others in the room also knew the extent of his self-deprecation. His speech during their worst moments in this city showed that:

Beatrice knew the most, of course. After all, she was the one who treated his scars. She knew that her contractor was like this, she had witnessed similar things in other people as well prior to her seclusion in the Forbidden Library. Men who had experienced war, women who had been violated, children who had been forced to grow up on the streets, parents who had lost their children, the spirits who had been chained to the promises they could not fulfill... The circumstances of the initial trauma did not matter – the traces it left did. Still, she blamed herself for not knowing about his issues sooner, or at least for not having of any way to help him, other than by being around him. She knew that her presence helped him at least in some way.

For Otto, the one event that let him see the real Natsuki Subaru, was the day he punched him at the Sanctuary. To see his usually cheerful friend in such a honestly pathetic state was a surprise, to say the least. The situation he found himself in was even worse. Otto felt like he had to lend him a hand. At first, he thought it was a way to repay him for saving his life from the Witch Cult. But then, after everything was over, the merchant found himself staying with all of them. And a sudden friendship became something greater – it became a brotherhood.

One might think that Garfiel did not know about this, but that was wrong. Since he spent a lot of the time on their obstacle course, he knew the extent of Captain's self-flagellation every time he struggled to pass it. He always played it off afterwards, but it was rather obvious that he meant the words he said in the heat of passion. Captain's life was quite unfair: he was well-built, but his mana flow was naturally really weak, and he had no Divine Protections to compensate for it. The busted gate was the worst, of course, as it limited what he can do and chained him to his spirit. Garfiel could understand the frustration, for he, too, had worked out really hard as a child to be worthy of protecting the Sanctuary. As it turned out, he was simply running away from his problems back then. So he knew just how frustrating the feeling of not being good enough was, he had experienced it again just a few days ago, after all.

Felix commonly experienced the similar feelings. Before the Royal Selection, he had at least coped with the fact by trying his hardest to perfect his healing abilities. If he could not defend Crusch-sama, he could at least treat her from injuries. That's what he believed in prior to encountering two cases where he could not do anything: first – the amnesia and the second – the cursed dragon blood. He thought that the Fate truly despised him.

Julius knew these feelings too. "Prove yourself worthy of Juukulius name: train, study, practice. Prove that you are not some bastard, be the best at everything you can, prove that you are the Finest." These were the worlds he he kept telling to himself. So what now? Now that the Gluttony has torn apart his efforts, his status, his title, his bonds, even his brother and his spirits? Now that the only link he has to his past and the only reason he does not wonder somewhere on the streets is the one who he used to scoff at? He was not really sure.

"There it is! There is the blood that he shreds. This is a proof of his heroism. Unlike you, you monster! You ruin everything you touch. You, who can do anything, yet the one who does nothing!"

Reinhard's inner monologue was not pretty either.

Al merely found it ironic. He did not like himself either, but the similarity felt rather uncanny. He did not want to be like him.

-----

"Ma-a-aybe then even a piece of shit like me might fi-i-inally be fuckin' worthy to be by your side and be able to protect you as a re-e-eal knight should."

The Half-elf Princess' mind came to a standstill. She had expected a revelation like this would be bad for him, but not this bad. Emilia could never have imagined that her knight thought of himself like that. He worked hard, too hard, for nothing in return, just her own well-being. If anything, she believed that she was not worthy to be with him, not the other way around. She already knew why he did so much without asking for anything in return – he loved her. Yet she herself did not feel herself to be a person worthy of being loved by someone so selfless, so kind, so amazing like him.

He needed her help right now, Emilia knew this. So the half-elf deliberated about what she should do. The lap pillow was her first instinct, she knew it would work, but since they were in public, she was too embarrassed to do so. Her second instinct was to kiss him, as his kiss had helped her a lot back at the Sanctuary. It didn't even have to be on the lips, maybe on the cheek. It felt like a good idea, since Emilia was no longer worried about being pregnant because of it (however, her sexual education ended on "the babies do not come from kissing"), still she decided she didn't want to give her opponents any more rumors about their relationship (Kinda late, Emilia). Eventually, she chose the third best option. Emilia decided that she would look even deeper into his problems at a later date and would provide him as much support as she possibly could until he throws out these re-e-eally stupid thoughts out of his mind. But for now, she just lowered herself to her knight, sat down to the his left, and gave him a very gentle hug.

"You re-e-eally are such a dunderhead Subaru... Of course, you are worthy to be my knight, I would not have it any other way…"

"No one says dunderhead anymore, Emilia-tan."

"Sh-h-h."

It was a rather touching scene, so the two lovebirds were left alone for a bit. Soon Beatrice joined them as well, claiming her place on his lap.

Two out of the ten strongest swords in this world lay discarded at Subaru's feet.

-----

"Fuckin' hell, Tella, you could've at least to-o-old me that."

"Or you could, you kno-o-ow, get me one of the-e-ese on the arrival."

Now, in hindsight, one would question why only one person in a shabby helmet paid attention to what Subaru just whispered (He swore under his nose). Of course, one would think that no one would have the audacity to make a pet name for one who is considered the worst person in the entire world. They really should have expected something like that might happen, given what had already occurred, yet even his latter worlds were utterly dismissed.

"No, se-e-eriously, Tella-tan, explain it to me ri-i-ight no-o-ow!"

"Fuck, fuck, fuck! If he calls her now, she won't let go of him. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Expand territory, matrix redefinition."

Now, Subaru clearly voiced his complaint out loud, talking to seemingly no one in particular. A few people turned in his direction again.

"TELLA-TAN, COME HE-E-ERE! WE HAVE THINGS TO TALK 'BOUT!"

He shouted now, getting the attention of the entire party.

And then something that no one else had even begun to consider, happened.

-----

10976.

At this point he gave up. The mental fatigue was getting to him, his performance was dropping, and he was still unable to solve even a tenth of this puzzle.

Sword Saint reacted first (Divine Protection most likely), but he hesitated to kill, giving him one more opening. Subaru was always second, as two blades massively boosted his combat awareness, he was the most dangerous, as he always managed to apprehend him and force a restart, worse, the more he tried, the faster his opponent realized the nature of his Authority. Beatrice was the third to react, and covered the magic front, thus even further limiting his options. Emilia was the slowest to react, so she was out of the equation most of the time, but should he dilly-dally, she would end it without any hesitation. He had not reached further enough to worry about the others. Magical attacks were partially nullified by his spirit, Reinhard covered the agility and strength aspect, and Subaru was the brains. Even when he managed to successfully land Ol Shamak on him (that was only two out of ten thousand), the Witch came in full force and ended those loops.

Even the option of simply interjecting into the conversation did not work, because he always said the cursed words:

"TELLA-TAN, COME HE-E-ERE! WE HAVE THINGS TO TALK 'BOUT!"

So he chose the final alternative. Stay calm and act as he was before, and don't talk much. When the opportunity presents itself, run. As far away from here as possible.

-----

For a brief moment Satella felt truly exited, since for the first time in centuries she and Envy felt unified in opinion, for the first time there was true balance between them, for the first time she felt like a single person rather than two fighting for control of a singular body. And the reason for that was:

"Tella-tan, he called me Tella-tan!"

For Satella, that old pet name of hers, the one that made her heart sing, was a sign that he cared for her, accepted her, even if he did not fully remember her. Unlike Emilia, she knew what "-tan" really signified (he told her back in the day).

Satella understood that even though he was not happy with her right now, he was not demanding from her to give him everything that he might want. It was just his consideration for everyone around him, something that Satella absolutely adored about his character. He just wanted to make the people around him happy, including her. After all, he had tried his very best not to die after their meeting in the Castle of Dreams.

Yes, she felt pangs of guilt for not even considering giving him something something that might have helped him on his journey. She felt ashamed that she had wasted four hundred years moping for her loss instead of doing something useful for when he would eventually return. After all, he said himself that he would return one day, that he would recollect the Witch Factors, and through the Authorities given to him, he would find a way to save her.

The soul of her beloved even remembered his promise to her: "I will find a way to save you". He said it thrice: once to Emilia, once to Envy, and once to her. One day she knew he would fulfill it. He would save all of them.

So, she knew what she had to do: She would apologize to him. She would apologize for everything, after all she felt just as useless and unworthy as he did. She did not know if he would accept it, but she would apologize to him nonetheless.

Thus so, without any hesitation or really any consideration for what her presence might cause to her loved one, Satella left Augria Sand Dunes to join the one she cared the most for.

Chapter Text

Everyone immediately felt that something was coming. First, the air suddenly began to feel very stale. Beatrice noticed a sharp rise of Miasma, both through the room in general and around her contractor, specifically. Then the mana crystals, that produced light in the ballroom, began to flicker. One after another, they went out, gradually plunging the room into darkness. The last one, however, suddenly shattered, exploding into dull shards, and thus leaving the room in complete darkness. Then it came. The oppressive sensation of primordial fear, the kind of fear that a cornered prey feels towards a pack of predators. Everyone instinctively sought the closeness of the person next to them: for Emilia and Beatrice, it was Subaru. Only two people remained unaffected by the oppressive presence. Then all the surviving mana crystals turned on again all at once, revealing a form surrounded by shadows. The form had feminine features. She was wearing a black dress with yellow roses scattered across it. Two streaks of silver hair were visible from beneath the veil that covered her face. She stood silently in at the center of the room, facing into the direction of the nasty-eyed knight who was currently slumped on the floor, held tightly by both his liege and his spirit.

Of the two people who were not paralyzed by her mere presence, Reinhard acted first. It was not like he was not feeling what everyone else was feeling at the moment, it was just that his Divine Protection was protecting his mind from very strong negative emotions. He felt five new extra Divine Protections given to him by the Od Lagna, so he knew instantly who he was dealing with: Divine Protection of True Phoenix allowed him to resurrect instantly as many times as he might ever want; Divine Protection of Witch Bane made him completely immune to any effect or damage caused by spells of Ul tier or below, meaning that only Al tiered magic had any effect on him; Divine Protection of Last Stand gave him the ability to temporarily resurrect his allies as potent echoes, ensuring that no life in this battle would truly be wasted; Divine Protection of Absolute Strength gave him the power to move mountains with his bare hands; Divine Protection of True Warrior seemed to be an improved version of Divine Protection of Sword Saint, allowing him to push his skills further than even he thought could ever be possible. With them, Sword Saint moved between her and the supposed target faster than anyone could see. Oddly enough, his instincts did not warn him of any hostility coming from her, not that he needed the conformation. Reinhard took the Dragon Sword Reid that his friend had already drawn (of course, the blade did not refuse to be wielded against the unwanted guest). He entered the battle stance and prepared for the immediate fight. In his mind, Reinhard already knew that most of the people would die here, and thus he silently apologized for not being able to save them. As he began to draw mana from his surroundings, concentrating it on his blade however:

"Hey, Rein. Chi-i-ill. That's Tella. Or at least it fe-e-els like that's Tella."

The second person, unaffected by her presence, intervened.

"I mean, if tha-a-at was the Witch, everyone here would be fu-u-ucked… metaphorically speakin'… okay, maybe I would've been fucked li-i-iterally, huh… actually, you, Rein, would probably have been fi-i-ine… would've been fightin' for your life, tho. Hope you can get up a lot more times than you did with that asshole Regulus."

No one in the room but the woman in question understood what he was talking about (she smiled at his throwaway joke, at Envy's expense). Now almost all of them were not in a position to understand, since they were still paralyzed by her presence. Reinhard, however, despite the fact that his mind was perfectly clear, simply could not comprehend what was going on between the two. But when he noticed that Subaru was not afraid of the woman just like he was not, as well as just how nonchalant was the nasty-eyed knight was about the whole event, he decided to step to the side, hoping that Subaru knew what he was doing.

The veil around her dissipated as she approached, revealing that she was indeed the person that everyone thought she was: a silver-haired half-elf with amethyst eyes, the ever-reviled Witch of Envy. She looked exactly like the tearful girl clutching to Subaru's arm, the only difference between the two being hairpins and the choice of attire. Her voice sounded just like the voice of the commonly hated Royal Candidate, and that voice said softly to the knight sitting on the floor:

"I love you."

"…"

-----

"I love you."

"Don't open with that. It makes it confusing."

"Sorry..."

All of her resolve collapsed the second she saw his serious expression. His gorgeous eyes, always so kind-looking, now judged her for her inaction. She looked down at her feet, no longer able to withheld his stare. Tears appeared in her eyes once again. She had to say the words she wanted to say to him, but they were stuck in her mouth.

"No, just show your love for him through your actions, just like he always does."

-----

Just like Emilia, Satella approached him from the right (his left was still occupied by the other half-elf, and the front by his favorite spirit), sat down alongside him and hugged him ever-gently. Her wonderful presence resonated with Subaru's own soul, and step by step, the sweet affection of pure and honest love purified his mind from the influence of alcohol.

He began to feel bad for what he had said. He had been inconsiderate to her once again. He had been a self-centered jerk once again. He had made her cry once again. He had to apologize to her once again. So he exhaled and spoke his mind:

"Listen, Tella-tan, I'm not really mad at you. The whole screaming bit is just me venting about my own incompetence. Really, you gave me a lot, too much even, more than I deserved. It's just that if I don't use it to save them, I might as well just call myself a murderer. And every time I do use it, I am a murderer, because without you, I alone am not enough. I did not mean to hurt you again… I… care, even if I don't remember. I will not break that promise, not to you, her, or Emilia. I will find the way… no matter what…"

Satella smiled as her previous feelings for him were reaffirmed in person.

"I know… just smile a bit more. Be happier. The people around you appreciate you, you already know that. So appreciate yourself too. You have achieved a lot already, and will achieve so much more in the future. Give yourself some credit. You are doing something that no one else can."

She embraced him even further. As the familiar warmth spread through his body, he smiled in return.

"I'll try. Not sure if I can, but I'll try."

The room remained silent for a while.

-----

It was not like Reinhard did not try to understand what the two were talking about, he really did.

Why did she look exactly like Lady Emilia? Of course, similarities were to be expected, but only her outfit differed from that of Subaru's liege. Why didn't the Witch cause chaos and destruction? Did Subaru have such an influence on people that even such a vile, despicable person became gentle and kind? Why did she say that she loved him? Why did he return her affection? What did the Witch of Envy give to him? It was obviously not a Divine Protection. Was it something like what the Archbishops had? Since she was worshiped by the Witch Cult, that was the only thing he could think of. Was he an Archbishop? He was clearly not evil, and he hated the Witch Cult, but somehow he did not hate her. Why did certain of the Archbishop's abilities did not work on Subaru? Why did Subaru call himself a murderer? He could not see Subaru killing anyone, with the exception of someone utterly malevolent like the Bowel Hunter, or a Sin Archbishop. Why was she even outside of her Seal? Had she always been able to do that during the past four centuries ? Was her imprisonment a lie? Why did she even react to his summons? Why did Subaru say that he did not remember her? What kind of promise did he make? Why was he so unhappy with himself?

A stream of questions flown through Reinhard's mind, questions that he did not know if he should ask about. Could Subaru even explain them?

Everyone else was still unresponsive. While the two talked, Sword Saint made sure to touch a couple other party participants who were paralyzed by the Witch's presence. His Divine Protection of Empathy allowed him to sense the emotions of the people he touched. After touching Felix, Julius, and Felt, all he could sense was nothing but a pure terror. Reinhard suddenly recalled that in the wild, animals in dangerous situations had three dominant reactions: fight back, run, or freeze. The first might occasionally work if the attacker was careless, the second might work if the attacker lacked the endurance to chaise you down, the third was reserved for when the situation was truly helpless and relied on the attacker simply not noticing your presence. This was that kind of reaction, very simple, primordial in its nature. Everyone else just realized at the same time that they stood no chance in a fight against the Jealous Witch, even while being together. Everyone but him, who might have a chance against her thanks to the gifts of Od Lagna, and Subaru who for whatever reason had a strong bond with her.

As the two hugged one another, Reinhard could feel an air of oppression gradually being reduced, no, rather just moved towards a singular person who was not perturbed by it, but rather appreciated it. The Sword Saint knew that others would soon be awakened from their stupor.

"What did you do, Subaru?"

This was the first question that Reinhard asked from his friend.

"Aside from calling her? Nothing really. It kinda was like that before. Don't worry, no one will get hurt. She was with me since the beginning, since this whole thing with Emilia, Puck, Elsa, Felt, Kadomon, Rom and you started. Let's wait for the others to snap out of it first. I am sure they have questions too."

-----

Beatrice was the first to wake.

"What. Was. That. In fact."

"Damn, Beako. And here I thought you'd be unfazed by her presence, you know, given your creator."

"It wasn't like that with Mother, I suppose. Betty knows that the Witch's presence can drive most people insane, but it never felt that intense."

"Well, at least you woke up sooner than everyone else. Well, me and Rein weren't affected at all, for entirely different reasons, but still, good job, Beako."

Subaru wanted to pat her head, but both of his arms were busy with two silver-haired half-elves that he happened to care for.

"You look and sound completely sober, I suppose…"

"She has that kind of effect on me. Although it's more like replacing one thing with another."

"Will you explain everything?"

"I can't really promise everything, but I'll explain some bits and pieces."

"What I saw… was it because of her?"

Of course, she was referring to his nightmares and self-harming episodes, something Subaru obviously understood.

"Yes and no. It was because of something that I was given, but it's really just something I did to myself. You know, Beako, I am a somewhat disturbing person, there is something terribly unique about me, that you might know about."

Authority. Beatrice knew that this could only be the case. She knew that he had the special ability to absorb more than one Witch Factor and not be driven utterly insane by them. Since he had killed Sloth and Greed, he probably already had those Authorities. Wrath, Lust and Glutonies were still alive, leaving either Pride or Envy. The latter made more sense, given his direct connection to the Jealous Witch. It implied that the Witch Factor was either shared or given to him. He was also particularly attuned to Sins, something that she had not witnessed in anyone else. Even his Miasma felt very different from any Archbishop, it fluctuated, spiking at times, then gradually dropping off. Some of it she could attribute to the presence of the Witch, while some she could not really explain at all.

-----

One by one, other people began to recover, some desperately gasping for air, others nearly collapsing face-first onto the floor, while some instinctively made a step back, nearly falling on their butts from the intense sensation.

No one, however, took their eyes off the utterly bizarre picture of the nasty-eyed knight sitting on the floor with three other people alongside him.

In his lap sat the familiar loli-spirit, the reason for his unique nickname, while on his right and left there were two half-elves. Their hair, their eyes, their ears, their faces, and their body structures were completely identical, so much so that they could be mistaken for twins. The only things that separated them were their hairpins and their choice of attire.

The person on his left had a white hairpin in the form of a pointed cross on her left and a white rose accessory woven in on her right. She was wearing a white and purple outfit that was commonly attributed to her by everyone in the room. She was known to everyone in the party, and her presence next to her knight wasn't exactly a surprise.

To Subaru's right, however, sat someone whose presence was both surprising and unwelcome. After all, she was the reason for their previous condition . Everyone here knew who she was, yet no one but Subaru had actually seen her face to face. Her hairpin was on her right side and resembled an eight-pointed star. Unlike Emilia, she wore a dress with woven flower patterns, a dress that could be considered beautiful, yet only the person next to her would consider her beautiful. And there was another really big detail – the coloring, black and yellow to be exact, which uncannily matched Subaru's preferred color scheme.

To Subaru's right sat the one person everyone had hated and feared since childhood, the one who was the reason why demi-humans of any kind (especially elves and half-elves) were not welcome in Lugunica, the one who had nearly destroyed the entire world four hundred years ago, the one and only – the Witch of Envy, Satella.

As everyone finally recovered:

"Subaru. What. Did. You. Do?"

"Now-now, Julius, slow down. Before I get a headache of explaining everything to you, people, let's set out some ground rules."

"Subaru-kyun, what makes you think you can…" "... dictate the rules!?"

"Shush!"

"Nii-chan, you look sober…"

"Shush again, and yes, I am sober, although I will have to get drunk again when I'm done. This shit will be stressful..."

"Actually, introduction first. People, this is Satella. If anyone's still hoping it's just a coincidence, it's not, she is in fact Satella. The one you all know. She's my… ehm, that's kinda difficult to describe in one word. I guess she's my ex-girlfriend, wait, we did not break up, so I guess just my girlfriend, maybe more... wait, were we engaged? No? Alright, just the previous bit then. Well, it's all kinda difficult to explain. She's also my benefactor, my stalker and my patron. We have a really strange relationship… I'll explain later."

"Girlfriend?!"

"I mean, she's literally in my arms, how else does this look like? Wait, Emilia-tan is close to me right now too, but we are not official yet, huh. Okay, that's just me being ahead of the curve, yeah! What I meant to say is, yes, girlfriend, you heard correctly."

"Anyway, back to it, the first rule, the way of address. You probably already know this, but I hate racist bigots, so if I hear "Half-Devil", "Witch" or any other insult in Tella's direction, you're gonna get whacked with..."

Noticing that Dragon Sword Reid was still in Reinhard's hands, still drawn, he chose to pull out the Yang Sword instead.

"You're gonna get whacked with this. Tella might swallow it, but I won't. Same as it was with Emilia. Correct way of address is "Satella", "half-elf", or "she" is fine. "Tella" is for close people and "Tella-tan" is reserved for me only. Don't get too personal either."

Now, no one would have gotten too personal, he thought, but he added that just in case.

"Oh, and Rein, you can sheathe Reid, you won't need it."

"Are you sure, Subaru?"

"Brute strength won't work here. As I said, you probably just gonna be in an endless stand-off. If something bad were to happen, it would be my problem, not yours. I guess I would just have to not drink anymore."

The last sentence was barely audible.

"Ah!"

The half-elf to his right gasped, understanding his intention to die if that happens.

"I know it would be a rather stupid occasion, but you understand why, don't you?"

Satella nodded back with a sad expression. She would not blame him if that happened. She would blame herself for not controlling her alter ego.

"Alright, friend. I hope that my trust in you isn't misplaced."

"Good, so we passed the hostile on sight phase? That's progress already."

"Ahm, the second rule, keep order. One would ask the question on his mind and I would answer, then another question and so on. No interrupting me or one another. Make a queue while you're at it."

"The third rule is mostly for me. I will tell the truth. I don't know the whole situation, but I will tell what I can. Tella may clarify things here and there, but she doesn't have to tell you anything, I do. No evasive answers either. We have two lie detectors here, so you'll know it's legitimate."

Subaru pointed to Crusch and Reinhard.

"The fourth rule is a result of the third rule. I own a veto. That is to say I can block any of your questions by saying "veto". There are things I can't disclose under any circumstances. The veto is here specifically for these things. No, I will not clarify them, even if you ask again. There are no limits on its use, so don't even think about working around it."

"Subaru-dono, can you tell the reason for this non-disclosure?"

"Your safety. I am sure you have noticed that we are standing near the armed nuclear explosive. Tella-tan can make the White Whale look like a joke. I mean, there is the whole "destroyed half the world" thing. Pretty sure she's still capable of that."

Subaru thought for a second about one of the past loops. Back when Rem was slain by the Whale, and he was ditched by Otto, the beast suddenly left. Was it Tella, protecting him? After all, she manifested later in that loop. If so, why let him die to rabbits? It made no sense. Both times he died to the Great Rabbit, the timelines were doomed anyway, true. But he could've just ended it himself, relatively painlessly, when he realized everyone was dead and he had nothing to learn from the situation. Who else then? Another thing to think about later down the line. One of many.

There were a ton of mysteries in this world, most of which took place four centuries ago.

"I really need to make a journal for all of this. Maybe write it in pure kanji, so there's no chance of the taboo being triggered."

Wilhelm, in the meantime, was mortified. It seemed that some questions could be dangerous for them. And any attempt to arrest the knight would probably end in a bloodbath.

"Alright, that will be all. Let's begin."

Chapter Text

"Emilia-tan, as I am your knight and all, you get the priority. Ask ahead."

"..."

"Ehm, Earth to Emilia-tan, Earth to Emilia-tan, he-e-ey. Oh no, Emilia-tan Maji Short-Circuit?"

"She's been like that since Satella arrived, in fact."

Very gently, he pulled her closer and softly whispered in her ear:

"Emilia-tan, I'm sure you have plenty of questions on your mind, so don't be afraid to ask, I'll try to answer them."

Finally:

"Subaru, are you a bad person?"

This was one of the first questions on everyone's mind right now.

-----

Emilia considered herself a rather kind person. She could empathize with most people, even to those who were cruel to her. She believed, that even the Sin Archbishops were worthy of empathy, maybe not in their current state, but they were probably decent people at some point in their lives.

However, there were two people in this world to whom she would never extend any kindness or understanding.

The first one ruined her childhood. She was the undoing of two people she could consider her mother and father – Fortuna and Geuse. She was the reason her people's blood was on Emilia's hands.

The second one ruined her adulthood. A legacy of the past that she had nothing to do with, but paid for it nonetheless. The reason why she was shunned, isolated. The reason why people flinched when they saw her on the street, the reason why children cried when she passed by, the reason why she never had any friends. The reason why her aspiration – to fix mistake of her childhood and unfreeze the Elior Forest – felt so distant. Only one person in the world was willing to accept her, to extend his name freely and simply ask for hers, to hang out around her as if she were a normal person, to say that she was beautiful and just how much he loved her, to help her whenever she needed it, to be willing to defend her against all odds.

That person now held Satella in the same way he held her. He told that she was close to him, just like she was.

It made her sick. She wanted to scream at him, call him a traitor, a liar, all kinds of mean things. Some part of her even wanted to hurt him, but mostly she just wanted to run away. Abandon everything and everyone, go back to her frozen home and spend the rest of her days wallowing in her misery.

"Liar, liar, liar!"

But then Emilia suddenly felt a familiar warmth. She had not realized it before, but her knight's hand was still wrapped around her shoulder. He was still right here, near her, holding her close. Subaru did not laugh, did not taunt her for her naivety, did not call her names, did not say that he despised her. More-so, he felt the same to her – sweet, kind, affectionate, warm. The same way he felt, when she threw a temper tantrum back at the Sanctuary. Just the same way he felt to her prior to their first kiss...

"Emilia-tan, I'm sure you have plenty of questions on your mind, so don't be afraid to ask, I'll try to answer them."

A very small part of her still felt that he was a liar. A vile, nasty liar who had played with her heart and then discarded it in the cruelest way imaginable. The rest of her, however, chose to place her trust in him.

Wanting to fully erase her doubts, she asked a very simple, childish question:

"Subaru, are you a bad person?"

-----

"No, I think. Loli with the power of judgment said that I am a good person, even though I treat myself like a bad one. I decided to trust her on that."

"Subaru?"

Beatrice wanted to confirm who he was talking about.

"Beako, you probably know her, given the time span, Emilia might have met her too. Her name is Typhon. Coincidentally, we are partying on top of her grave."

Beatrice's eyes widened in understanding. However, Emilia did not show any signs of it.

"Hm, no? Emilia-tan, did you only meet Echidna did you perhaps not meet anyone at all? Back during the trials, I mean."

"I don't remember meetin' anyone weird durin' my trial, Captain."

Garfiel had been too busy with Mimi before (something that he might regret once he'd sobered up). Now, however, he was paying close attention.

"I've met Echidna… and another one, after the future trial… She had not told me her name."

"What did she look like?"

"She told me not to look… She was very scary, so I didn't…"

"Did she do anything? Made you drink tea?"

"She hugged me."

"Hm, how tall was she?"

"A bit shorter than me."

"Was she feeling shy?"

"No… but a bit brash..."

"Oh, that's Minerva. She's alright. A large bloody hypocrite with anger issues, but she's the least dangerous one on one compared to the others. Probably almost as destructive as Tella, though."

"Minerva?"

Julius wondered why Subaru could match the name of the Witch with this vague description.

"I've met them all, so it's easy for me to figure out."

"Betty's contractor refers to the one who was the Witch of Wrath four hundred years ago, in fact."

"The Witch of Wrath? But there's only…"

"That's a common misconception, I suppose. There were Witches of Sin other than En… Satella."

Beatrice corrected herself before her contractor delivered on his promise to "whack" her.

"Their names and their actions have been erased by history, I suppose. As for Typhon, that is the name of the Witch of Pride, in fact. She died here in Priestella."

"What do you mean by "almost as destructive", Subaru?"

Reinhard wondered about the knowledge that Subaru had about the Witches of Sin. It wasn't too unreasonable, since he was courting one.

"Well, her thing was that her touch was completely harmless, no, even better – it healed you, no matter what injuries you had. She hated seeing people get hurt around her, so she went around punching people and healing them in the process."

"And? That doesn't sound bad, nyah."

"Well, Felix, she wasn't using mana, well, she was, but not in the way that casting spells works. It's that the mana was simply being annihilated completely in some other place of the world as a cost. That made bad things to happen there: earthquakes, floods, that kinda stuff, that caused people to get hurt and die there. So Minerva came to those places and started working again, and so on and so forth. You get the idea."

"Oh, that's…" "terrible."

"One thing you all got right, is that Witches are beings beyond normal understanding. Although, I guess I am a hypocrite like her as well."

"And Typhon? What did she do?"

His knowledge of the Witches of Sin was quite interesting to Echidna. Probably even more interesting than his own weird background.

"He knows about my creator as well. I should ask him about her. Probably one-on-one, however."

Initially, she thought that his connection to Satella could be used against him. But after consideration, she realized that rumors of him courting the actual Witch of Envy (not the one mistaken for her) would sound too unbelievable. After all, if he'd said something like that an hour ago, she wouldn't have believed it.

"She judged. You see, she's just a child, so she saw everything in black and white. "Are you a good person or a bad person?" If she touches your limbs, she can separate them. If that causes you pain, then you're a bad person, and if does not, you are a good person. I felt no pain. So I'm nice!"

"That's a monstrous thinking."

Julius shivered at the thought. However, he did not deny that Subaru seemed to be a quite decent person.

"She's just a product of her environment, really. Not malicious at all. Well, since we are it, I'll tell you about everyone else as well. What I know, anyway."

"Sekhmet (that's Sloth) is the most chill. She's mostly sleeps all the time, I have not seen her standing ever since I've met her, but she's quite strong. Bellow Tella, but stronger than all the others."

"Carmilla (Lust) is a shy one, despite the supposed preconception. She appears to you as someone you like, but if you stay too close to her, enraptured by her presence, eventually your heart will eventually just stop. She really did not seem to want any of this. Look at it more as an unfortunate curse. Relatively wholesome girl, if you look past the unintentional manipulation."

"Daphne (Gluttony) is honestly really terrifying. Outside of her always wanting to eat everything she sees, her main idea is kinda noble. She's all on the "stop hunger" business. That's a good goal, yes, but the way she's done it… Well, she's given us a nearly inexhaustible source of food, but it has fangs, and claws, and horn, and eats more than it can feed, oh, and from what I know, tastes terrible. You all probably figured what I mean. The Big Three are also her doing. That's yet another thing that's been pinned on Tella."

"Finally there's Echidna, that Greedy bitch. She's a high functioning psychopath, utterly emotionless. Everything she does is either a centuries-old plot or some research opportunity, if not both. Her only passions are knowledge of everything and everyone, as well as creating things, be it a magical artifact or a living being. She can be reasoned with the most, but she just won't shut up and is an endless source of trouble. Oh yeah, she also made Beako, and Puck, and Ryuzus."

"Betty does not approve of such foul words towards Mother, but she's willing to forgive her contractor for them, given what happened a year ago. Your description seemed to capture Mother's essence the best, in fact."

"Beatrice-sama?"

"Betty and Bubby were indeed made by Mother four centuries ago. You should not concern yourself with this, Sword Saint. Subaru's "associate" is much more dangerous, I suppose."

"As for the original question. I am a terrible, weak, lazy, and disgusting person, yes, but I am not malevolent. Well, does that answer it? Oh, Crusch, Rein?"

"No lies."

Emilia, whose doubts about him dispelled by this point, really wanted to interject that last part ("His not terrible, weak, lazy or disgusting!"), but Subaru's intentions to push the interrogation further made her change her mind. She would certainly say it, but after this is over.

-----

The next question came from Crusch Karsten:

"Are you a Witch Cultist, Natsuki Subaru?"

"That is kinda the same question, no? I am not a Witch Cultist. I despise them."

"No lies."

"But you are connected to the W-… to her."

Julius did not understand him.

"Well, one thing I found in Priestella was that Satella did not really matter to the majority of the cult. The only one who revered her was Petelgeuse, and he was completely out of it! Well, more out of it than others. They felt more coherent, is what I mean. I even remember that Sirius absolutely despised her, even to the point of blindly mistaking Emilia for her."

"I mean… Subaru, I… We look identical…"

Emilia felt dejected. It would have been one thing if it had only been a resemblance, but they were actually identical.

"Yes you do, at first glance, but you're both quite different in various aspects."

The girl found it hard to believe. She knew that he meant it, but it did not help.

"Anyway, my personal though on this is that Satella is simply a scapegoat. There is someone acting as a sort of unifying center, yes. Someone who can influence the Archbishops, since they began acting closely together, but I hold no delusions that she is the one at the top."

"Pandora…"

"Emilia-tan? You sound quite angry."

"The one who probably leads them is the Witch of Vainglory, Pandora."

"How do you know that?"

"During the trial of the past, I witnessed her invade my home and… and kill my foster mother. Puck locked out those memories prior to it. There she brought him. I didn't remember him before, he looked so… unremarkable, but looking back at him now, yes, that was him. She brought Regulus Corneas."

"Ah, so the bastard did not only stole you, tried to marry you, but also killed your parent. We should've killed him more painfully then. Maybe set him aflame. Or thrown him into a Rabbit dimension."

"No, she… dismissed him early on. Pandora is the reason, she is the one who killed Mother Fortuna and drove Geuse mad! She's the one, she's the reason I…"

"Sh-h-h, Emilia-tan. It is fine, I am here. Don't worry, she'll get the Rabbit treatment yet. Beako, brainstorm the idea."

Her knight patted her gently on the head. Eventually she calmed down.

"He and Geuse talked something about the Witch Cult. Geuse wasn't evil back then, he was good to me."

Subaru could believe that. Still, he could not excuse him, after all, he had witnessed him trying to desecrate Emilia's corpse in one of his failed loops.

While Beatrice thought about the logistics of using Al Shamak to throw someone into the place where she left the Great Rabbit, Subaru continued:

"One thing I have found in common in them is that they hold insane misconceptions about love."

"Love?"

"Yes, Wilhelm-san, love."

"Petelgeuse was obsessively trying to seek the closeness of one who will never return or praise his devotion. Thus, he was merely wasting time. That is Sloth."

"Sirius seeks to unify others in affection for one and other, however when she was pointed out that love can truly blossom in the differences between two people, she became incredibly angry. That's Wrath."

"Capella wants for everyone to drool over her, but doesn't understand that obsession based on one's appearance is not a true love. That's Lust."

"Regulus was obsessed with the women that he called his own, vigorously sheltering them alongside himself. But he didn't truly care about their well-being, or really about anyone else but himself. That's Greed."

"Lye, Roy, and Louis seek the experiences of others, wanting to see, hear, and feel what their victims do. Like someone, they'd otherwise be close to. But they do not care that they are destroying their "meal" and people they care about. That's Gluttony."

"And Pride?"

"I have never faced Pride. From my understanding, that seat is currently empty. Petelgeuse thought I was the one, but that is just a misunderstanding on his part."

"Are you sure that is not the case, Subaru-dono?"

"Why so?"

"In your Pride, you believe that only you are capable of understanding her, that only you are capable of understanding love in general, but your opinion of her is biased due to your feelings, and your understanding of what it really means to love is only one of many."

Some people nodded in acknowledgment of this theory. His first debut in the Capital was the epitome of the word Pride.

"Interesting theory, perhaps in some other world… It would've been a terrible world for everyone else in this room, however. No, for all of Lugunica in general..."

Subaru pondered his words:

"Am I truly better than Archbishops or Witches? Minerva even said how disgusting my mindset really is. Even Tella was sad because of it… What's more, if I finally do go mad, how bad will it be for everyone else?"

"It would be really bad, apocalyptically bad, "burn Lugunica to the ground"-level bad," was his conclusion.

Somewhere in another universe, the Sin Archbishop of the Witch Cult, representing Pride, Natsuki Subaru, suddenly sneezed, surprising Reinhard van Astrea, who was facing him in the process.

"If anything, I think Envy fits me more."

"Well, I'm for one glad that is not the case and that you're not some insane cultist, bro. That answers it, I think."

Al tried to divert the conversation. No one seemed to notice his concern about this.

"Throwing someone into the same place that the Great Rabbit went to is indeed possible, I suppose. It requires additional precision and mana, but it is quite achievable, in fact."

"Eh, I was joking, Beako… "

"Urgh, why did you not tell me that!"

"You know, sometimes your bloodthirstiness frightens me. Who was that terrible parent who taught you that throwing people as food to the rabbit horde for food is a good idea? Was it Echidna? The next time I see her..."

"It was you who gave me the idea!"

"Oh, so I am your parent? Gotcha."

"Urgh!"

The lighthearted banter between the half-elf's knight and his beloved spirit seemed to lighten the mood of the partygoers.

-----

"Ahm, why is she here, Nii-chan?"

"Tella is here because I called her, Felt."

"And why did you call her?"

"Well, I had the whole crisis with her not telling me that I can apparently just use two of the strongest swords in this world. So she came here to talk, I sobered up, we made up, while you were pissing your pants, and now we are sorta just... here."

"Actually, Subaru-kyun, how are you completely sober?"

"She has that effect on me. Among others."

He patted Satella's head, earning her pleased expression. Emilia to his left felt an incredible urge to pout for some reason. So she did, in fact, pout. Noticing this, Subaru patted Emilia as well. Crisis averted.

"People like her have a certain presence to them. Echidna had something similar, and according to Emilia-tan, so did Minerva. In your case it terrifies you, in my case I guess it just makes me think straight. Same with others. Think of it as my superpower. Sorta like the Divine Protection of Being Unfazed by Witches."

"And she answered yo call because?"

Anastasia-Echidna, like everyone else, understood the reason he seemed to be so used to Satella's presence, but decided to ask just to clarify it further.

"Oh, she's been with me since the start of my adventure. You know, Emilia, Reinhard, Felt, since that fateful day."

All three nodded in understanding. They remembered that day quite well.

"Consider Tella my patron, my benefactor, my soulmate, we have a... unique connection. So yeah, she has been watching me all this time. Or most of the time, I don't know. I don't really understand, that must have been really boring."

"It was not boring, dear."

"I mean, after 400 years of waiting, it makes sense. Can not blame you for that. At that point, anything would be entertaining."

At this point, Subaru more or less accepted his stalker. So he wasn't really upset about that part. Taboo in his mind was the worst part of their relationship, or maybe dying in a painful fashion, or maybe losing people close to you. Honestly, now he felt unsure which was worse. Of course, he could not complain to them about any of that.

"Wait, how do we know that Subaru-kyun is not brainwashed by the Wi-... Satella."

"There were no lies in his words, thus far."

"I can confirm Crusch-sama's words as well."

"But that doesn't confirm it! He may byelieve that this is the truth, but only speak what she wants!"

"Take that back, Felix."

The Yang Sword was drawn.

"See, he even gets dyefensive!"

"As someone who has had both my mind and body hijacked, I can confirm that I am not under any control. Also, I have experienced your attempts at brainwashing me."

And he knew that the Authority of Envy probably controlled the time aspect of reality; it couldn't brainwash.

The last accusation raised a few eyebrows. Felix could not deny that, not in front of Crusch and Reinhard – he tried it during Subaru's Gate treatment, by injecting his mana into him. Since Subaru began organizing the White Whale expedition, his treatment had been halted, and after his gate broke, it had been completely wasted, so it wasn't as if he had actually succeeded.

"That is correct, in fact. Subaru was under the effects of Wrath's influence, back when Emilia was captured. He is not acting like that now."

"I can also confirm that Subaru's body was temporarily under the control of the Sin Archbishop of Sloth. Wait, Subaru, was she the reason you regained control?"

The latter nodded at the questioning Julius. Technically, it wasn't truly the case, as it was the Witch who had expulsed him, but it was close enough.

"Shouldn't we still check?"

"Betty did not perceive any mana interference when Subaru entered Roswaal's Manor. Still, she will check again, if you really want this."

Beatrice chose not to disclose that there was a subtle change in the miasma around her contractor. It was still present, but it felt more balanced (?), it was rather odd. She still believed that her contractor was in his normal state. It might just be the result of two users of the same Witch Factor being in a close proximity.

After probing his Od, she suddenly noticed something really different. It felt like his Od was stretched out a bit. It wasn't an unknown phenomenon to the former librarian, what surprised her was the reason behind it. Something like that occurred during the spiritual contracts or...

"Synesthesia?"

"Beatrice-sama?"

"Betty's Subaru has Synesthesia with Satella. Now that they are right next to one another, it is very noticeable, in fact."

"But they are not twins?"

Emilia knew from Subaru's words that Rem and Ram had it. Synesthesia was supposed to transfer the emotional sensations from one to the other.

"I presume that it was made artificially."

"Is that even possible, Lady Beatrice?"

"We have a living proof, in fact."

"Doesn't that confirm that Subaru-kyun is under her heel?"

"It doesn't confirm that, in fact. Synesthesia does align the mind towards the recipient, but only slightly. It's not enough to overwrite or twist someone's will. Betty's Subaru is just that level of eccentric, I suppose."

Most of the people in the room agreed with the sentiment. Great Spirit's words made the people around the black-eyed knight give up on the "he's brainwashed" idea and made them lower their guard a bit.

Of course, Subaru was not surprised by this – Satella somehow had to see the world throw his eyes somehow, otherwise the taboo couldn't be imposed. This connection only made sense.

-----

Julius was next:

"Why is she so… tame?"

"Because she's Tella."

"Because she is Te-… Satella?"

"Because she's Tella, not the Witch. That's why you have to address her properly."

"Excuse me?"

Julius grew more and more confused with each sentence.

"Do ya mean that there are two…"

Spirit Echidna looked at Emilia and then corrected herself.

"No, three identical silver-haired half-elves present? One's da Witch and two are good people, da first is yo patron and da other is yo charge?"

"Yes and no. Physically there are two. It's a really convoluted story. It has to do with the whole "destroyed half of the world" thing. I don't know the entirety of it, but essentially it goes like this: Tella was a good person, still is, something bad happened to her specifically because she was a good person, hence that turned about half of her bad. That now separate half made her go out of control, half of the world paid for it. Split personality, the original Tella did not want this. People tried to kill her, but failed. The Sage, the Dragon and the Sword Saint sealed her, but not really. You probably realize now that her exile is voluntary."

"Somewhere in this story, probably before the Witch bit, I'm introduced, we got into one another, as you would expect..."

At his last words, Emilia shivered. She had long since noticed that Satella paid zero attention to the people around her, her eyes locked on the dark-eyed knight with deep affection. What's more, Subaru seemed to be really affectionate towards her too.

"They used to love one another before? No, not used to, they still do..."

"...In the end, before her imprisonment, I promised her that I'd find a way to save her from this, which is why she stayed there. That's promise I intend to keep."

"Wait, Nii-chan, does that mean you're over 400 years old?"

"Eh, maybe? As I said, I don't exactly have the memories of the event, just the pieces of info that I got in the past year. So while I'm may be older than Beako or Emilia-tan, it's kinda like the same situation as you."

He pointed at the girl to his left, who had spent a century in a block of ice.

"Can I even be considered four centuries old if I can't remember? In that sense, I always felt like the older one to you, Emilia-tan, no offense."

Emilia could not believe it. Previously she had been so preoccupied with her own jealous thoughts (she had not realized that she was jealous, but she certainly felt a nagging pain in her heart) that she had almost missed this.

"Did he just call me immature? I mean, I know that I am sometimes, but that's re-e-ealy hypocritical, mister!"

She decided, however, to show that she was indeed mature and chose not to snap back at him for this.

"Wait, Beako, I just realized – I really am a parent here!"

"Urgh, alright. Betty will call you her parent if you wish."

His eyes widened at this. He already treated her as his child or as his younger sister (he was not sure which one), but to hear her say it out loud was surprising.

"So, Subaru, are you saying that the stigma she got is undeserved?"

Subaru's story made Julius wonder:

"What other lies have we been told about our past?"

"It is deserved, but do not blame Tella, Emilia, elves, half-elves, or any demi-humans in general. If you want to blame something, blame the Envy who caused the whole situation."

"So Satella is not a vile person?"

"Mhm."

It was hard for Emilia to swallow it. While others hated Satella due to what was attributed to her, Emilia's hatred was purely personal. It was why she was always alone, just her and Puck.

"Until Subaru came to me…"

She felt like she was being unfair. Besides, what exactly had she done to prove that they weren't the same? She had done similar things before, just on a lesser scale: hurt others by not controlling her powers, isolated herself, always created difficulties…

"Wait, if we are so alike, then..."

"Subaru, do you care for me because of her?"

Emilia was conflicted. She would be incredibly hurt if he said yes, but she would accept it. Since he and Satella were together 400 years ago, his feelings for her are likely a lot stronger, so she did not know how exactly she could compete with her counterpart. After all, she still felt that she wasn't exactly worthy of his efforts.

"Emilia-tan, that's hurtful. I'm not that shallow. If you think the reason I don't flinch when I see your face is because of her, then you're wrong. I mean, my initial crush on you could be attributed to that, yes, but I fell for you because of your actions, not because of how you look. Otherwise, I would have been satisfied with Carmilla or Capella."

That calmed Emilia down a little bit. She realized that he would've probably just abandon her if her looks were all that he liked about her. Instinctively, she clung to Subaru even closer than before. The pain that the Royal Candidate felt inside her heart subsided somewhat.

"I have to seriously rethink my stance about what's occurring between me and Subaru. What will happen when he finally gives up on me?"

"And you don't feel that this is all cruel. To both of them?"

"Beat it, Julius, that's my problem, not yours. It doesn't make me care any less about either Emilia, Rem or Satella. It's just that it does not sound very believable, you know. I mean, I could not confess something like that to Emilia-tan unless I am wasted, apparently. It does make me a piece of shit, yes, I never denied that. As for Tella, she's not jealous, ironically. That's why "the bad thing" happened. She never went on the rampage because I cared for someone else."

-----

"Ehm, Natsuki-san, about "the bad thing", what exactly did you mean?"

"Tella-tan, should I just veto this? We are approaching a bad theme."

"No, it should be fine, I think."

"Alright then. So Otto, to your question: I assume all of you here know that Archbishops posses supernatural abilities, just like the Witches."

"You imply that they are similar in nature?"

"No, I mean that they are the same thing. They all posses or have possessed in the past, something called the Witch Factor. Each Witch Factor is associated with a certain Sin: Lust, Greed, Wrath, Gluttony, Sloth, Envy, Pride, Vainglory, Melancholy. Each of these gives you a supernatural power called Authority."

"Is it like a Divine Protection?"

"It is not, in fact. In this world pecking order, it would be: Magic and other abilities associated with the use of mana, then Divine Protections, then Authorities."

"That seems to be the case, Beako. Using an Authority is not reshaping reality to your will, no rather breaking it apart and then reassembling it as you see fit. Albeit you can replicate certain things that Authorities can do with magic or a Divine Protection. Once you break a piece, the surrounding mana gets twisted as well, which is what Miasma is, I think."

In any case, Subaru really felt like he was breaking the reality apart. After all, he was a user of one, which in his opinion was the strongest one, even if it was the most cursed one.

"Authorities adapt to the user, but tend to follow the idea that the associated Sin represents. Once the user dies, the Witch Factor moves to the next person most attuned to that Sin. We all know where the first six Witch Factors are. Vainglory is in the possession of that Witch, Pandora, but Pride and Melancholy must be out in the world somewhere too."

"Envy is hers right now, and the reason the bad part of her exists is because she is incredibly incompatible with her Witch Factor. The real Tella is rather wholesome."

The one addressed drew closer to her beloved.

-----

"But wait, Natsuki-san, Regulus Corneas and Petelgeuse Romanee-Conti are dead. That means the Witch Factor has moved on to someone else."

"Yes, Subaru, it must be in someone else now."

Subaru sighed.

"Dug myself into that one. Otto, you annoying bastard! Now even Julius is shoving his long nose where it doesn't belong. Eh, at least I can do this."

Slap!

"Ow, what…"

"That's Sloth. I will not demonstrate the second time around."

"What was that for, Natsuki-san?"

"Sanctuary."

Otto's cheek swelled from the force of the slap. Subaru wasn't in great state either. ("Note to self: no more free demonstrations.") Still, doing that felt good. He needed that punch from him back in Sanctuary, yes, but still his pride was still hurt back then – he honestly thought he could easily beat Otto one on one. The merchant always felt a bit flimsy compared to everyone else, even him.

"Wait, Subaru, that's exactly like…"

"Invisible hands? Somewhat. It's just one hand, and feedback sucks. So don't expect me to grow two thousand, Julius. I'm not sure if I'm just that unlucky or just using it wrong. I did make it intangible that one time, so it's still somewhat useful, from time to time."

"Wait, Subaru, that's what you used…"

"...against me in da Sanctuary, Captain."

Garfiel and Emilia both realized what the last blow in their fight was. The one that wasn't the Patrasche charging in to save the day.

"That's when it first awakened, yes. Greed is not awakened yet. Oh, and that's how I got that heart out of you, Emilia-tan."

"Yes, I understand what you did now. You must have forced it out of mine."

"Heart?"

"The invincibility that Regulus had was time based, he simply stooped time around him selectively. But he could not do that forever. To mitigate that, he moved his heart to his wives."

"We solved it by temporarily freezing them, and for me, by what Subaru did."

"So that means you have two of these Witch Factors now?"

"Well, the first one you could count as a lucky coincidence, but after the second one, you'd start to think I am a preferred target."

He did not mention Envy, of course.

"Preferred target?"

"Person with the highest affinity for Sins. Just another one of my superpowers."

"So is you seeing Sloth's hands and remembering me and other Gluttony's victims, a part of it?"

"M-m-m, probably? I haven't figured that part out yet, Julius."

"Natsuki-san, but all people who wield these Witch Factors seem to be… how shall I say it…"

"Clinically insane. Yeah. So far, I haven't jumped on people yet, although I've come close at times, not because of the Witch Factors themselves, but because of well... other stuff. Oh, and locking me up is a bad idea. For various reasons. So is killing me off, if you do that, it's just gonna be different person somewhere else."

"I don't think anyone here wishes that for you, Natsuki Subaru. You have proven your worth."

Crusch did not remember the details of the White Whale's Subjugation, but between the words of Felix and Wilhelm, it seemed like he had performed quite admirably, if a bit recklessly, back then. He acted the same way during the siege of Priestella as well.

"Hm, so is there any reason to keep Sirius Romanee-Conti alive then? If this commoner is capable of absorbing her Witch Factor, it would be better to simply kill her."

"I don't think it's wise to empower yo political opponent, Priscilla."

"'Tis is not a matter of useless politics, but rather a matter of general safety, she-fox. If that wench escapes, all the effort to catch her will be for not. Her Witch Factor must be neutralized."

"There's another difficulty with her. Her Authority transfers not just emotions, but injuries as well. Killing her without collateral damage is incredibly difficult. Plus, some further interrogation might still be a good idea. Because of Sloth, she treats me like her lover, Petelgeuse."

"Yes, Betty's Subaru is right. When he got hurt by that bastard Regulus, so did other people on the square who were linked to him, in fact."

"You were really brave back then, Beako. Very reckless too. I seem to be a bad influence on you."

"Betty knew that you wouldn't forgive me if I simply left everyone else to bleed out, I suppose."

"That's my Beako."

Betty's Subaru was particularly generous with head pats today. Beatrice certainly appreciated it. She preferred to have them all, of course, but, unfortunately, the Great Spirit of Yin had two dastardly opponents in a bid for her contractor's attention.

-----

"Tella, did I get everything right?"

"For the most part. You got one thing wrong, though."

"And that is?"

"Your role. Back then people called you the Sage."

"Wha-"

Chapter Text

"The Sage? Considering the time it took place in, do you mean Sage Shaula?"

"Lambda Scorpii, the Raised Tail, huh. But Shaula is a girl's name. Well, I guess I could've called myself that. But that's a big stretch. Still, the name checks out. "

"It is? Why are you so certain that it's a female name, Subaru? Sage Shaula is a famed hero. And he was certainly described as male. One of the three who sealed… Satella."

"Well, that does make sense, at least."

"Hold on, how does it make sense that you are the same Sage who apparently used a girl's name?"

"Natsuki-san has a unique skill when it comes to cross-dressing."

"Nah, that seems fishy, Brotto. He's good, like really good, but I can't see da Captain goin' that far. Besides, in that case it would've been Sage Natsumi or somthin'."

"Wait, Julius-san, there was another one before Shaula – Sage Flugel?"

"Flugel? Oh, that tree guy? I actually like that name better. It feels nicer..."

Finally, Satella intervened, by both clearing up some confusion, but at the same time raising tons of other questions:

"It was yours. You liked to call yourself Flugel. You were also the one who organized my containment, not your daughter Shaula."

-----

Subaru did not know what to think.

"Flugel, huh…"

"Tella, do you know how and why I made the tree so huge?"

"You asked me and Echidna to accelerate its growth. You never explained why."

"Ah, I see..."

Now there were two permeating theories circulating in his mind:

The first was that it was merely a coincidence and that Fate-sama was pulling yet another prank on him.

The second one was far more drastic – past-him predicted what the future-him would do. Or worse yet, that all the troubles he had experienced in this world were all a set-up. Now he did not know how: Precognition? Some big overarching time loop he had tinkered with? Or had he reshaped this reality from the ground up?

It felt very overwhelming. So, for the sake of his sanity, he decided to stick with the first theory for now.

"Wait a second. Subaru had a child?"

"I don't think you should worry about that, Lady Emilia. I suspect that Shaula was his child in the same way that the Beatrice-sama is to our current Subaru."

The only one who could confirm this neither proved nor disproved the theory. In fact, she did not react at all to Reinhard's words, let alone anyone else's. Convinced by his words, Emilia exhaled in relief.

"Urgh, Sage… What a dumb title… It's like the polar opposite of who I actually am… Someone get me a drink."

"Murak. Shadow Brand Arts."

Two shadowy appendages sprouted from Satella's back and quickly passed a floating bottle and a glass to her beloved. The people around her were rather perturbed by such a casual display of power, but predictably, no one voiced any complaints.

"Oh, hey, shadow arms. Nice to see they can be used for convenience. Hm, I never tried to use Providence for something as simple as this. I wonder if there would be any feedback…"

He took a shot, and then another for the good measure.

Emilia wanted to complain about Satella stealing her spell name, but after thinking about it, she realized that it was probably Subaru who came up with it as well.

-----

"Em, Satella-sama, can you explain how he received this title?"

Again, Reinhard received no answer. He thought about letting it go, but Subaru repeated his question.

"Yeah, Tella, you probably know, right?"

Now the only thing Flugel was known for was the tree, which did not make sense considering the title.

"Is it the same thing as with Tella? Historical revisionism? Or is it by design?"

"Well, you did not like it back then either, but that was due to the knowledge you brought here. After all, the reason Farsale and Alec made it in life was thanks to the inventions you came up with. You let Alec claim most of their legal ownership."

"Alec, as in Alec Hoshin?"

"Farsale Lugunica?"

This was asked simultaneously by Garfiel and Julius respectably.

"Wait, ya mean that all da Hoshin inventions were brought by Subaru… I mean by Flugel?"

If Anastasia was in control of her body, she would probably jump on Subaru (maybe even literally) and demand to share some things with her. Like maybe explaining the intricate nature of Hoshin's secret script, or maybe the contents of some untranslated texts, or… Echidna was a lot more tame in that regard. Only Subaru and a certain redheaded princess figured out that something was wrong with her. Neither of them commented about it.

"I mean, Subaru brought some of his town's festivals. Oh, and the mayonnaise, so that fits."

"Urgh, another bloody misconception, huh? Speaking of, why was mayo not popularized? No way past-me would have forgotten about this."

"You spent months with Daphne perfecting the recipe. Sadly, it alongside any mention of it, were lost to time… Shame, I really liked it."

"Given that's Daphne we are talking about, it was probably perfect. Damn it, something that Rem and I did in our spare time is probably a child's play compared to it."

"So, that dish that grew popular in Costuul recently came from Subaru?"

Previously, when he and Al had talked about food preferences, Echidna had wondered what exactly the word "mayo" meant. Turns out, it's a short for mayonnaise – a dish rather popular in the Mathers' domain.

"Sorry, Anastasia, but it's patented. You'll have to need to pay royalties to distribute it. Can still make it for personal use tho."

Subaru did, in fact, go through the paperwork to register it behind his name before the mayo's sudden spike in popularity. One of his brightest ideas, really, as the royalties are now bringing him almost as much money as his knight's stipend (although he can always just ask Roswaal to pay him more, if he needs more money).

-----

"So I think this is it..."

"One more question. How exactly does she help you?"

"VETO!"

"Subaru?"

"I SAID VETO, EMILIA!"

Emilia was taken aback by his sudden forcefulness. In the meantime, Subaru was in a panic. He expected that this would be the end of it, since he had told pretty much everything he could. And, of course, when he thought he'd avoid it, he was hit by it. Worst of all, it came from her of all people.

"So, anything involving our… partnership is off-limits. Jealous Witch is indeed jealous, I really don't want Satella to make a switch to her nastier alter ego. One thing I think I can say is that it's very important, and that's we made it thus far because of it."

The black-eyed knight took one more shot and wrapped his arm tightly around Satella's shoulders, hoping that his closeness would calm down both himself and the Witch. The people around him still silently questioned him about what he had just said, but seeing that they can't pry an answer out of him, they let it go.

-----

Thankfully, something else interrupted the uneasy silence:

"Argh!"

"Crusch-sama! What's wrong, nyah?"

"Felix, I remember!"

"Remember?"

"I remember everything! Fourier, you, the Whale, everything!"

At the same time in the other part of the room:

"Julius!"

"We remember you and Joshua!"

The people of Anastasia Camp also experienced a sudden revelation.

"Subaru! I remember Rem. Besides what you told me about her, that is."

"I do as well, in fact."

"So do I, Captain."

"Rem is back!"

There were tears in Subaru's eyes, happy tears. A part of him still could not believe what he had just heard. His greatest failure was no more, one of the most important people in his life was back at her rightful place beside him. He wanted to leave the party right now, to run on foot all the way back to the Manor, to hug her really tightly, to ask her if she remembered everything he had said to her during the past year, and if not, repeat it all again. At this very moment he felt "fanatical like an Oni" again. Only one question remained:

"So why did Gluttonies' victims come back?"

Eventually, his excitement faded, and he felt something completely different – a familiar sensation, the same one that he experienced after the death of Sloth and Greed. New Witch Factor just entered his body, but it felt fragile, incomplete.

"Given the sudden memory return, I assume that someone killed Gluttonies some time ago. Two out of three, one's still alive."

"Does that mean you have claimed their Witch Factor as well?"

"Yes, Rein. But it's still incomplete. That probably means that Roy and Lye are dead, considering those who have returned. Hm, I wonder who killed them?"

"Since the Sword was drawn by you, probably your friends."

"Friends? What friends, Tella?"

"You shall see. They should come in soon enough."

Satella winked playfully at her beloved. Truth be told, she missed them all too, almost as much as him.

"Almost."

And then, as if on cue:

Bang! A part of the building's wall broke apart, revealing the majestic face of the giant azure dragon.

"I, am Volcanica. In accordance with the ancient covenant, the will of thee who hath reached the top shall be questioned."

-----

Sometime prior in the Pleiades Watchtower.

The Great Divine Dragon Volcanica was pensive as always. Some that might look at him and think that he was merely asleep or gone senile, but that was not the case. It was just that the most of his mind was not really present here, as the majority of his self was withdrawn in deep contemplation. Occasionally he would awaken and share his wisdom with smaller races, leaving the prophecies to the people of Lugunica via the Dragon Tablet. Well, it was not actually his wisdom. Like for many whose names are remembered in history, Volcanica's knowledge came from a rather humble source – his late friend Flugel. He was, in Dragon's opinion, a rather interesting, remarkable human being. A monumental person who had reshaped the world by his actions, yet chose to erase himself from people's memories, to vanish from the annals of history. Part of him could not blame him, after all, his journey had ended in such a tragedy. His obligation to him chained Volcanica to this place, that obligation, that, as well as his own desire to keep watch over the one sealed in here. The Holy Dragon cared a lot for said person as much as he cared for his dearest friend.

"Is Mezoreia alright? She said she wanted to pass on her duties to her morrow child, back at which hour we last met. I suppose we won't ha s't our talks anymore..."

-----

The desert was quiet as usual. Every day, Shaula kept watch here on the balcony of the Watchtower, waiting for a sign from her Master. Not many people made it past the sandstorms, and those who did usually ended up either being eaten by witchbeasts or Hell-Sniped by yours truly. To pass the time she practiced: normal shots, blind shots, super-long-ranged shots, curved shots, barrage shots, 180-shots, 360-shots, 720-shots and even 1080-shots. Usually, she would just choose one of the roaming witchbeasts as a target dummy. Regardless how hard Shaula tried, she could not yet accurately nail a 1440 – her head would always begin to spin, ruining her accuracy. Her Master told her it was all about style, thus making as many spins as possible was a sign of superior aim – something that the brown-haired scorpio took great pride in. She wanted to try to nail a shot mid-free-fall too, but the Tower's enormous height prevented that – after all, she could not fly. She could land one mid-jump, tho.

"First blood!"

"Double kill!"

"Multi kill!"

"Mega kill!"

"ULTRA KILL!"

"M-M-M-MONSTER KILL!"

"LUDICROUS KILL!"

"HOLY SHIT-IT!"

As usual, she made a voice-over for every shot she landed. After the 27th, Shaula was satisfied with her performance.

Over all, it was a rather typical day for her, as typical as every other day 400 years prior. But then something atypical happened.

-----

Reid was weirded out. He manifested back in the tower, which meant that someone had started the second trial, but no one was here. At first, he thought it was someone invisible, but after sniffing the room, walking around, and throwing his sticks in the random directions, he figured the room was indeed empty. His second thought was that the trial had simply malfunctioned – Flugel was a one crafty bastard, but no magic can work properly forever. However, that was likely wrong too: the room was still covered in white, and he was summoned properly, with all the bits intact, so he'd figured everything was working. Then it came to him.

"That bloody bastard! He's alive!"

He felt it through his blade, well, not actually his blade, as he was, as his title suggested, a Stick Swinger. Rather, it was the blade that he, Flugel, and Echidna had made as a prank for his unlucky descendants. A fragment of his soul recognized his old drinking buddy, and through it he knew that he was alive and kicking. Reid realized he needed to regather the crew: he thought about bringing Tella first, but that chick would be the first to know he was here anyway, she was always all over him. Farsale and Hoshin were six feet under, so were the other Witches (he was dead too, but that was beside the point). That left only Volc and that Scorpio Chick, Shaula. He hesitated for a bit, thinking it would be a dick move to leave on a whim, but then he said "Fuck it" and rushed to the top of the Tower, or to Maia, as Flugel liked to call that floor.

-----

A few minutes later:

"Thou, who hath reached the top of the tower. Step forth onto the first floor, almighty petitioner."

"Ayo, Volc, are ya there? Ah, for fuck's sake!"

Whack! A strike to the Dragon's reverse scale seemed to have brought him to the lucid state.

"Dear Reid. What is thy seeks?"

"Flugel, that bastard made it back!"

"Friend Flugel?! He's alive?"

"Alive, and kickin'! Drunk as shit as usual, no doubt. Da stupid sword told me so."

"Ah, the Dragon Sword? We might not but maketh haste then. Where is our friend?"

"Somewhere in good ol' Priestella, looks like."

"Priestella? Ah, yond brings back the pleasant memories…"

The Dragon withdrew into his mind in contemplation once again .

"'ey, Volc, it's no time to nap. Me and Shaula need a ride."

"Ah, aye, we all must meet our old friend again. But what about Satella?"

"She's sealed, forgot? I mean, if he's there, she would be da first anyway. Not like that shit is goin' to stop her from swoonin' for her man."

"'Tis indeed true, those two art connected by chains of fate... Has't thee called Shaula yet?"

"No, gimme a minute. By da way, do ya know where that bastard put all the booze?"

"Shaula shouldst know. Doth thou want to take a bottle with us? A memory of a time long past?"

"Yeah, but not just a bottle, a whole crate, ya know how Flugel likes his booze. Gotta take some with us. Stay here, Volc, gotta go."

Now, aside from grabbing a crate of mead (for himself), he also wanted to grab a couple of bottles of whiskey for his old buddy. Reid did not actually like whiskey, it was too strong in his opinion. He did not know how Flugel could even drink it. The Stick Swinger rather preferred something simpler, like mead, beer or wine. The things that his buddy had used to drink hit so hard that even Volc could be floored by them. Given that the drinks had been stashed for four centuries he'd probably gonna enjoy them a lot. So he sprinted down to Alcyone, in hopes that Flugel's busty apprentice was in there somewhere.

It took him sometime, as she was apparently on the balcony.

"Ayo, Scorpio Chick! Are ya there?"

Eventually he found her shacking, huddled in a fetal position.

"Shaula, damn it, wake da fuck up! Flugel's back!"

"Wha-… Master?"

That seemed to snap her out of it.

"Where? No one had breached through the dunes today."

"Not here, dumbass. He's chillin' at Priestella. Pack yo things, Volc's gonna hitch us a ride. Oh, and where is his alcohol stash?"

"Ehm, Master explicitly forbid anyone from touching his drinks." "Even me…"

"Ah, just ignore his orders, Bimbo, this is an exceptional case anyway. Besides, Flugel would probably like ya to have a rebel phase. And if he drinks enough..."

"… he would not be so prickly about my affection!"

In about 15 minutes flat, they descended to Asterope that apparently also had a hidden booze cellar (it made sense, you should keep your drinks cold). To the Reid's dismay, it was all whiskey. After finding the crate with the gold mark on it (which, in his buddy's opinion, meant the best quality drink), Reid effortlessly grabbed it and went back to Maia with clearly exited Shaula.

-----

Above the sands of the Augria Sand Dunes, the two Sin Archbishops of Gluttony, Roy Alphard and Lye Batenkaitos, rode on a Vollachian flying dragon, trying to find a way to cross the dunes. Frustrated by the lack of progress, Lye closed the Gospel that he was reading.

"Have you hit a dead end again, tsu?"

"We wish the Gospel had been a little more specific about a way to get there, tsu!"

"We wonder if we will find a big enough feast there."

"Tsk! You should stop eating everything you find, no matter how nasty it is, brother. You know why we have to get there, tsu."

"Yes, we know you are excited to meet our sister. So are we, tsu."

Suddenly:

"What's that, tsu?"

Lye turned to look at what his brother was talking about. At first he found nothing amiss, but then suddenly he noticed it too. He had never seen anything like it before, not even in memories that he ate, but he had a feeling that he would find out soon enough, as it appeared to be getting closer and closer.

"Huh, it almost looks like…"

Before he could finish, Lye's eyes widened in horror as he realized it was a huge blue dragon that was flying towards them at a ludicrous speed. Unfortunately for them, before either could say anything or react in any way, he, his brother, and even the dragon they were riding were nothing more than a splatter of blood on Volcanica's scales.

-----

"What was that?"

"Probably nothin'."

"Thou ranneth over some homeless looking kids, flying a lesser dragon."

"Oh no! Fuck! Not again! We have to hide da bodies!"

"There is not much left to conceal, dear friend. They art but a fine mist."

"Well, it looks like we won't need to dig shallow graves this time. I hope the Master won't be mad."

"In earnest, this has't hath happened if thou alloweth me to fly myself, Reid. I am m're than capable of soaring, considering, thee know… that I am the Divine Dragon!"

"Oi, I'm not some chick ya need to give a ride to! Besides, I need to make sure ya won't fall asleep and fly us beyond da Great Waterfall again."

"Sigh, myself am perfectly awaketh. Hold on, dear friends. Myself shall gain speed now, brace thyselves!"

Chapter Text

"I, am Volcanica. In accordance with the ancient covenant, the will of thee who hath reached the top shall be questioned."

"Is that..?"

With her knight's name finally restored, Anastasia was back in her body. Echidna told her what had happened so thus far. It was wild, in the Merchant Princess' opinion:

"Subaru wieldin' two great blades? And havin' a relationship with Satella? And bein' a forgotten legend from 400 years ago? Hoshin's balls! And what do tables have to do with that?"

This one, however, took the cake.

"… Divine Dragon Volcanica?"

Like his mistress, Julius was equally flabbergasted.

"Do ya know another blue dragon that calls himself Volcanica? No? Then he is Volcanica, ya dumbasses. I'm Reid, by da way. Oi, Volc, have ya fallen asleep again?"

"Nay, myself just thought of a mirthful jab at the past memory."

"Ancestor…"

"Reid Astrea…"

"Reid-sama…"

All three Astrea descendants immediately prostrated themselves before their ancestor.

"Oi, idiots, stop bowin'. Did ya like our prank with da sword?"

"Prank?"

"Yeah, Flugel probably looked sick as fuck, huh? We locked up da Dragon Sword so that only we, da original bastards, can use it at full power. It's basically a glorified stick in yo hands, kiddo."

The Stick Swinger stuck out his tongue before Reinhard, who was beyond confused at this point.

"Ehm, he was, but he also ruined two perfectly good tables. And then da third one, but with da other sword."

Those cost Anastasia a decent amount of money. Finding an intact one was a challenge in the cult-torn city.

"Ha-ha, that sounds just like Flugel! When he's hammered, he gets stupidly capable, but also can't take a step without bumpin' into somethin'."

He turned to Subaru:

"Oi, nice to meet ya, buddy. Ya even got Tella here too."

-----

"Master!"

Ever enthusiastic, Shaula ran to her Master first, arms outstretched. She even ignored random people that were in her way, shoving them away. She also ignored the fact that all the space around her Master was occupied. But before she could collide with the people sitting on the floor and topple the Sage, the Royal Candidate, the Great Spirit of Yin and the Sage's Lover:

"E.M.M., in fact! S.M.M.!"

The two Yin casters prevented that, causing the Scorpio to fall on her butt.

"Ow! That was mean, Tella-san!"

"Wait, S.M.M.?"

"Don't look at me, you named it."

She winked at him mischievously, of course they both knew what that abbreviation meant (Satella-tan Maji Megami). Unlike Emilia, who paid little attention, Satella loved his cute acronyms. Subaru, in the meantime, wondered what else had happened in the same vein as his first adventure in this world.

"Time really is a flat circle…"

"By the way, who is she?"

"You don't remember, Master? I'm Shaula, Master's gorgeous apprentice!"

She made an exaggerated bow. More than few recognized the familiar mannerisms.

"Shaula, Sage Shaula? Julius, write this down."

"On it, my lady."

"No, not a Sage, no one can be called the Sage but my wonderful Master."

"Wait, so Shaula is not a Sage?"

"Flugel called it "psyop", whatever da fuck that means. He told Farsale and Hoshin to spread lies and pin most of his achievements on da Scorpio Chick."

"Ah, so I did erase myself then..."

"Alright, cross da Sage part, Julius."

"Yes, my lady."

"Scorpio Chick?"

"She's a witchbeast, technically. You and Daphne made her in your spare time. You did not like Great Rabbit, so you two decided to make someone intelligent. Well, more intelligent than a normal witchbeast."

Satella did not mind her. Shaula was a bit loud, but in many ways she reminded her of her beloved.

"But, why is she so…" "… noisy?"

"Hot? I wanted a hottie, ya wanted a loli. We placed a bet 'bout who can drink da most – da one that won got to design her. Sadly, she's just into ya and pretty much no one else."

"You cheated, Reid. You mixed Fannel fruit into his drink."

"Yes, Satella is correct. That was an unfair play, friend Reid."

"Hey, I did not say: "play fair". I said who can down more bottles of "Premium", his bottles just happened to be spiked! Besides, drinkin' is da one thin' that Flugel can beat pretty much everyone at. That and in sewing, oh, and in cross-dressin'."

-----

After some time, Shaula managed to find a spot near her Master, just behind Satella and her beloved. Having finished with Shaula (for now), Subaru turned his attention to the Divine Dragon:

"You know, this design is quite weird. I expected True Dragons to be a lot less humanoid."

Most of the people around him were miffed at his audacity, but after reminding themselves that he was the Volcanica's friend in the past, they decided to stay silent. However, The Dragon wasn't offended at all:

"Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Thou truly hath not changed, Flugel. Albeit, thou words do worry mineself, hath thou not remember the path we walked?"

"Mhm, got back some bits and pieces from some sources and some speculation on my own part, but I had basically started fresh."

"Oh, no! Master forgot again? Is that why he didn't remember Shaula?"

"Ah, for fuck's sake, Flugel! Again!?"

"Wait, how many? Is casual amnesia something I do?"

"Three times. Well, four, if ya count this one."

"We need to get Master to Taygeta ASAP! He always said, if he forgets things…"

"… get him to Taygeta, yeah. We have to brin' him back after da party. Volc, are ya with us?"

"Myself shall accompany thou as well, old friend. Albeit, I wonder if thy memory loss was due to Satella?"

She nodded in response.

"If so, then this might be unnecessary, not 'til thy plan comes to fruition."

"Still, he might need to take his old stuff. Maybe get some more whiskey while he's at it. Speakin' of…"

Reid finally plumped the whole crate on a table, tilting it and its contents in the process.

"… Best we've found in yo stash."

"Oh, more whiskey! I gotta get drunk again after all this hassle."

"Where do ya intend to take him? What is Taygeta?"

Anastasia had her own plans for him.

"Taygeta is da third floor, where his library is. We're goin' to Flugel's old base, Pleiades."

"Pleiades? Wait, Pleiades Watchtower?" "How convenient, huh..."

"Damn old me was eccentric… Pleiades, really?"

"Subaru?"

"Emilia-tan, remember how I said that I was named after a star cluster? Another name for it is Pleiades. So I literally named it after myself. I assume the other floors are Merope, Maia, Electra, Alcyone, Celaeno, and Asterope?"

"Yep, Master. Asterope is a cellar, Celaeno is a ground floor, Alcyone has living quarters, there's a first trial in Taygeta."

"Electra is where my trial is."

"And Maia is where myself resides."

"And Merope?"

"That's where my Seal is, dear."

"Yeah, so, given we have ya now, I don't think our trials are even necessary. Yo weird-ass monolith trial still works tho, no doubt. Alright, we'll head out tomorrow after getting hammered properly for da good ol' times! Volc will hitch us a ride."

Anastasia wondered if she could ask to tag along for the visit to the Tower. After all, that was her and Echidna's original idea.

-----

"Ehm, excuse me, but why are you so certain that Subaru is your old friend Flugel?"

Emilia did not mind his new (old?) acquaintances. Still, she wondered why they treated Subaru like a such a familiar face. If what Satella said was true, then he was indeed the Sage Flugel, but why was Sage depicted so differently in all the paintings compared to how Subaru usually looked?

"Oi, Tella, is that yo child or what? Never knew that he finally knocked ya up."

"No, not a child, its, well, complicated…"

Satella was a blushing mess and so was her lover.

"Well, he shoulda, with all his efforts. I swear, six hours a day! In a row! Ya two were so loud about it too! Like, I get it, I'm a ladies man, but this fucker is a fuckin' monster!"

Men and women in the room had different thoughts on their mind. Certain people whistled, certain people shuffled uncomfortably, certain people experienced feelings of incompetence, certain person felt pride for her contractor, certain people blushed, certain person remembered the nights with his wife when he was young (he loved his dear Theresia so much), quite many were jealous, some of Satella's luck and some of Subaru's relentless endurance, and certain person raised his thumbs up for his Captain, already coming up with a knight's new nickname.

"Six? Hoshin's balls! That's… I don't think my body would last that long. Alright, plans to seduce him are out of the question. Eh, definitely should not tell to Julius about having these. "

"'Tis most impressive if one could satisfy his bride for six hours. Maybe there is some worth in him as a man... "

"Six? I don't think I could last for that long... Still, I would like to try… No, think of Fourier, Crusch!"

"Yes, I remember. Makes me really jealous of Tella-san. I wonder what Master would do to me if I were in her place…"

"What were they doing for six hours? Kissing? But that's not loud, and well, it does not make babies, so… Maybe I should ask Subaru about that."

"As expected from Betty's contractor. His skills at seducing women are only surpassed by his shrewdness, in fact. No doubt, Mother was probably curious about him as well."

"You were very good. Six was too much even for my own stamina. I usually fainted at the end."

"Not helping, Tella-tan. I understand why Envy is like this now."

The pair in question murmured with one another, both red as tomatoes. Subaru's thoughts were anything but pure right now, as were Satella's.

"What kind of face did she make? Eh, no stop! No horny thoughts! Calm yourself… yes... calm... I am calm…1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9… 10. "

Subaru had an unfortunate expertise when it came to dealing with panic attacks, so he used the same technique to calm himself down now. Satella, in the meantime, vividly remembered the nights when her love made her feel like royalty. She did not even attempt to calm herself down.

"As for yo question, child. It's coz of Tella. No one but him can tame that bitch."

There was a sudden change of atmosphere as sparks of anger flashed in Subaru's eyes, his previous thoughts were completely gone. In an instant, he jumped up, the Yang Sword was drawn and:

"SHUT THE HELL UP."

"Ah, shit, forgot how pissy he gets. Sorry, Flugel."

People were surprised both by Subaru's face at the moment (they were reminded of the promise he had made if someone was to insult Satella), and by the genuine concern of Reid. The girl in question felt giddy.

"He would slam himself face-first into a wall should anyone messed with his girl. What's worse is that he always breaks through that wall, too."

The Dragon, the Scorpio and the one proclaimed to be the Witch all nodded in agreement. Julius found himself resonating with Reid's words too. After all, he had experienced the same during and after their duel. Some things had not changed indeed.

"So what was he like? I just find what you just said incredibly accurate to my own experience with Subaru, Reid-sama."

"I mean, besides what has already been said? Utterly suicidal, but always comes out on top. Sounds and acts like a dumbass, but an actual genius beneath all of that. Wild shit always happens around him, he's a one big trouble magnet. Despite bein' weak as a chicken always rallies the strong people behind him. Incredibly smooth, like if he wants a girl or a guy, he gets it, a matter of time really. At da same time, loyal to a fault. Makes a strikingly hot chick by da way, almost got into bed with him that one time. As you have seen, really fuckin' scary sometimes, those eyes can kill a Dragon. Would kill for his friends and family, in fact he did back in our day and probably in yos. Amazin' father, always had a bunch of little ankle-biters around him. Good at sewin', for whatever reason. Beneath it all, just a really nice dude with a ton of personal issues."

"Friend Reid speaks the truth. Friend Flugel is a remarkable individual."

"So Subaru really is…"

"... Flyugel, nyah."

Felix finished his mistress' sentence, thinking exactly the same. Everyone who knew him figured that this was indeed the case, as it was the most accurate description of Subaru they could think of. Most of them hadn't completely trusted Satella's words before, but when they were proven by Reid Astrea and Divine Dragon, they could not doubt them anymore.

-----

"Hm, guys do you know why am I allowed to wield this?"

Subaru drew the Yang Sword.

"I mean, I get why I can wield the Dragon Sword since I am a buddy to Reid, but this?"

"Oh, it's coz ya are an heir to Vollachia, like permanently."

"The hell?"

Satella chuckled, that story was rather hilarious:

"During one of the parties, you and Reid barged into Vollachia and saved the emperor of that era. So, as a reward, he asked what you needed: Reid got a one-night-stand with one of his daughters, and you asked for the "coolest sword". Since then, you've been an honorary heir to the Empire of Vollachia."

"I knew it!"

"Shut it, Echidna! Did not hear da Sage theory from ya."

"So can I wield like all of them?"

"Mhm, don't know why ya would tho. They are pieces of cheap trash. Beatin' opponents with chopsticks is what ya should do."

Grinning, he pulled out his pair. No one dared to question Reid's logic.

Reinhard found it humorous. Due to the nature of the Dragon Sword, he often had to fight barehanded as well. Though in his case, it was a necessity. Suddenly, he understood the joke that Subaru and Reid had played on him. It almost made him lose his composure.

"You went on a rampage collecting all nine of them at some point, my dear. Then you made the Dragon Sword. You should be well attuned to all of them."

"Huh, nice. So, new quest: "Collect The Legendary Blades. Part 2.""

Shaula started to clap in excitement.

"We are going on an adventure!"

-----

"Hey guys, did you happen to kill the two Archbishops along the way?"

"Whom?"

"Eh, they're like Witches, but worse."

"Worse how? What did they look like?"

"Twelve to sixteen looking, unkempt, erratic, hunched over, really sharp teeth, always seem like they want to eat?"

"Oi, Volc, does that rin' any bells?"

"'Tis might be those two that thou ran over."

"Wait, ran over?"

"Yeah, we had a roadkill along the way. Master, I hope you are not mad at as again. I swear I wasn't behind the wheel this time. It was that stupid Stick Swinger!"

"No that's fine, that's actually good and honestly really convenient. You saved a bunch of people, and I got a tad bit stronger cause of it. The victims are probably already looking for their relatives."

The mystery behind the cause of the sudden return of Gluttonies' victims seemed to be solved.

"Speaking of whom, Tella-tan, Rem's probably worried sick right now, can you bring her here? Oh, and Ram with Roswaal, they are probably wondering what's going on, too. Oh, and Petra with Frederica and Meili, why not. Hm, add Joshua to the list too, Julius needs to meet his brother."

"Aren't you putting too much pressure on your girlfriend, I wonder? Yin magic is strong, but not all power…"

"Done."

"...full."

Before Beatrice could finish, the half-elf snapped her fingers and summoned everyone aforementioned in by opening direct portals to their locations. Predictably, the spirit was upset.

"How!? Why!? Urgh! Betty need centuries worth of mana for something like that, in fact!"

"Hey, I spent a lot of time studying Yin Magic, and my mana pool is actually quite big. Like really big."

"Then why didn't you just take care of Great Rabbit for your boyfriend a year ago? Why did you force Betty to deal with all of Subaru's problems?"

"Hey, it takes effort to force myself out of the Seal. Plus, I always risk losing control every time I do. It's all good right now, since he's here to deal with it. So, I can be more liberal with my mana usage."

Only Subaru noticed that these were the first words that Satella said that were not addressed just towards him or their past friends.

"She must feel more welcome then."

-----

It took a bit, but eventually everyone summoned made it through the portals.

"Rem!"

"Nee-sama!"

"Brother!"

"Julius!"

Most of the people that were brought here paid no attention to their summoner. All but one:

"My-my, Subaru-u-u-kun. We are not so different after a-a-all."

"I would say we are still different, considering that you have no chance with Echidna. You know, of all the times I met her during Sanctuary, she never once mentioned you."

Satella found the burn particularly funny, as she was the only one besides her lover who saw the events taking place. Still, she was a bit mad at Dona for attempting to steal her boyfriend, and attempting to break his mind in the process.

"She was yearning for me in her own way, you know. But just like you, she had zero chance. Not after what she did to Beako."

In some other universe, Subaru sneezed, surprising Emilia. At first, he thought about resetting, but after an hour of Emilia playing nurse to him, he reconsidered.

"That does feel rather nice."

Echidna inside his pendant scoffed.

Betty was indeed correct that Mother was attracted to her contractor. She was also very glad to be chosen by him, or was she the one who made the choice? It was difficult for the former librarian to figure out.

There was a spark of a genuine anger inside Roswaal's eyes. Subaru's jab clearly struck true.

"Bullshit. Besides, do you understand what danger you are placing everyone in here in?"

The Clown clearly meant the danger of involving the silver-haired witch who was currently to his right. He was so serious that he even dropped his mocking tone.

"Not bullshit. Besides, do you understand what danger you are placing everyone in by bringing her back?"

The Sage clearly by this point understood that Roswaal probably needed him to bring Echidna back.

They do feel rather similar sometimes, don't they?

-----

Their exchange was suddenly interrupted by a blue-haired maid.

"THE WITCH!"

Predictably, her horn was already out, morning star and spells at the ready. She was about to unleash her power on the offender, but:

Whack! The strike was blunt, but nonetheless incredibly quick and incredibly painful. In an instant, Subaru pulled away from both of his silver-haired ladies, tossed Beako aside and shrugged off Shaula (to the dismay of both), drew the Yang Sword, crossed the distance between them in a flash and made a singular, precise, blunt strike to Rem's horn. It was spectacular really, even Priscilla was impressed with his attunement to the blade.

"Ow!"

"What have I always told you, Rem?! Think before you act! Do you see Reinhard with the Dragon Sword in hand?! Do you see Volcanica breathing fire?! Do you see anyone else ready to fight 'til they die?! No?! Then why did you go into "oni-mode", huh?! Also, we have rules about not calling her nasty names. Sa-te-lla."

"Subaru-sama?"

Both Petra and Frederica were surprised by his sudden forcefulness. Neither had ever seen the half-elf's knight this mad, especially towards the person in question.

"Barusu, who gave you the excuse to hurt my sister?"

The people did not know about what be impressed the most – the Sage's swift punishment for mistreating his woman, or the red-haired oni's audacity. Said oni acted on reflex, the second she noticed the blade in his hands, her eyes widened.

"Nee-sama, you know full well that your sister is a dumbass sometimes. Even if she means well."

"Subaru-kun?"

Rem touched a place where her horn had been just a few moments prior. It hurt a lot, but just like the last time Subaru struck her there, there was zero permanent damage.

"Ugh, I have to explain the whole thing again. Alright, here's the synopsis for all who missed it..."

Chapter Text

"... and after tha-a-at Tella summoned everyone and that's pre-e-etty much it. Ah, fuck, that's nice, I need mo-o-ore of this new stuff!"

In about twenty minutes, Subaru was done with his explanation. He also finished a bottle of the "new stuff" that Reid had brought to the party. So it did not take him long to return back to his drunken state. About halfway through, as his words began to devolve into incomprehensible mumbo-jumbo, others joined in his stead to help him finish the story.

Rem felt betrayed at first, but after realizing the fact that Satella had nothing to do with the cult that supposedly worshiped her, she made peace with his choice. She also figured out the source of his scent, something that no longer bothered her anymore. She also learned a valuable lesson – don't provoke her Hero. There was still a nagging pain in her horn.

Ram was mostly neutral. The connection to Satella did not bother her as much – she already had to deal with another person who was infatuated with a witch, and Roswaal was honestly way more troublesome than Barusu ever was. However, she still decided to tone down with casual insults in his direction. Mostly for the sake of self-preservation. Just in case.

Petra was a bit more hurt. First, she had another contender for Subaru's heart. Second, said contender was already incredibly close to him – she wasn't sure if Satella was above Petra's blue-haired colleague, or even the silver-haired Royal Candidate or not, but she was certainly out there.

Meili did not care. As long as Subaru and his crew could protect her from Mama, she was fine with pretty much anything. She liked it in the mansion, only her inability to play outside could be her only complaint towards them. The little girl still wasn't over the death of her sister Elsa yet, but she understood the reasoning – it was either them or her and Elsa.

Frederica found the whole thing rather troublesome. She wasn't sure if this affair would go public, and if it did, would it hurt the standing of their Camp, improve it, or simply be dismissed as an overblown rumor. Still, she decided to put her trust in the Sage.

Roswaal had simply changed his priorities. Getting rid of a four-century-old stigma was certainly an ordeal, but it could be achieved with Subaru's unique "talents" and his own wealth and ingenuity. There was a one particular issue with the Dragon – there was no way Emilia's knight would allow him to die now, but that only changed the method of achieving his goal – if theoretically one of Sage's Authorities could be used to bring her back, then all he had to do is to strike a bargain. Of course, that in itself could be guaranteed, but he could still succeed, even with the oath he had taken.

Joshua was the most flabbergasted. He wasn't over their first introduction, and he certainly hadn't gotten over this second one.

"Seriously, how much bizarre can one man truly be?"

-----

The place around the Sage grew more and more crowded. In front of him were three of his "daughters" – Petra and Beatrice took a spot on each of his laps, while Meili sat in the middle. To his left sat his liege and Royal Candidate named Emilia; behind the former sat the previously forgotten blue-haired oni maid employed by the Mathers' estate, or simply Rem; to Subaru's right sat his patron and lover that was previously referred as the Witch of Envy, but now just called Satella; and right behind her sat his Scorpio apprentice that was formerly mistaken for the Sage, Shaula. It was a rather weird family picture.

"How is this camp even functionin'?"

"I have no idea, Anastasia-sama."

The one that was responsible for the functioning of said camp grinned after overhearing the whispers between the Merchant Princess and her knight. After pulling out another bottle of whiskey out of the crate and passing it around to his friend, Otto decided to check one of the bottles for himself.

"Pleiades Premium. Produced by the Pleiades Great Brewery. I had not heard about this brewery before."

"Well, it's his establishment. He invested a crapton of his money in da one particular guy, whose drinks he liked. The name is da result."

Reid, who had answered, was already emptying the party wine supply.

"Compared to what it made, this shit here is just a ground dragon's piss."

"And what happened?"

"Well, ya heard da story about Envy wreckin' half of da world? That childhood fairy tale? Da brewery was in da wrecked half. Otherwise, ya people would never have been drinkin' this watered-down shit."

The Stick Swinger was rather upset about the quality of the drinks presented. The alternative would be to drink whiskey, like his buddy, but he did not want to wake up later in the middle of Gusteko wearing nothing but what he was born in, like the last time he tried to outdrink Flugel.

"Natsuki-san, can I try one?"

"Su-u-ure!"

After popping the cork and pouring himself a shot, Otto inhaled the fumes and:

"Argh!"

"Ha-ha-ha! Strong shit, right? Absolutely da best thin' you can have, but it floors ya harder then a ground dragon in heat."

Otto, being the drunkard of the Emilia Camp (a position he suspected he no longer possessed) did not expect to be hit with just the fumes of the drink.

"Dragons get in he-e-eat? Should I worry about Patrasche? Maybe get her a bo-o-oyfriend?"

"They do, Natsuki-san, but Diana is a rather picky breed, they usually make offspring once or twice in their lives with a single partner. It should not be a problem for you for now."

After answering Subaru's question, he took the shot and:

"Oh, that's nice… Oh, fu-u-uck, Natsuki-san… How are you even standing?"

The world began to spin rapidly in front of the Internal Affairs Officer.

"I'm not standin', I'm sittin'! That's a big mistake, Otto! This is Ple-e-eiades Premium! 'It makes you see the stars!'"

Truth be told, Otto did see the stars, so the advertisement slogan was rather on point.

"Captain, can I try it?"

"Yea-a-ah! But only one shot for you and Mimi. And don't do anythin' stupid after, you two. Don't make me babysit your cubs in a few years."

The two people addressed quickly turned red. After his words, the others at the party finally acknowledged the couple. A strange looking bruise in the form of lips on Garfiel's neck was noticed as well. Tivey and Hetaro, who had previously left them alone, quickly split up the young pair before the Sage's prophecy could be fulfilled. Party poopers.

"Love?"

"Tella, you want too?"

"Mhm!"

Her first experience with Pleiades Premium was also her first experience with the main patron of said drink. She did not remember that night, but after the awkward morning, the whiskey for her was always associated with fun (and occasionally lewd) times with her lover.

"Subaru? Can I have some too?"

"Emilia-tan? Didn't you say you weren't goin' to drink tonight?"

"I have reconsidered. It seems re-e-ealy good. But I don't want much, only a bit."

Emilia's insistence was mostly to not be one-upped by Satella.

"Shaula?"

"Yep, me too, Master. I want whiskey too."

"Rem?"

"Subaru-kun, I'm alre-e-eady a bit... hick... drunk… from you..."

"Ah, shit. I forgot she's always gets floored from the fumes alone. Oka-a-ay then, each of you girls gets a shot, too. Well, maybe not Rem, she looks more wasted than me. But no-o-o more. Ladies have to be presentable!"

"Subaru-sama, can I…"

"No! No drinkin' for children, Petra!"

Petra's angry pout was quickly suppressed by the legendary head-pat technique. The other two lolis just chuckled at Petra's attempt to fit in with the adults. They received additional doses of parental affection from Subaru as well. Anastasia grew rather jealous of Subaru's parenting skills.

"Truly, da powers of da Lolimancer are somthin' else…"

"'lright, anyone who wants it and is of able age, gets a shot! On the house!"

-----

After the said free shot, what had previously been a mostly civil party devolved into a bunch of cuddle piles.

The largest one, of course, was around the Sage: Emilia mumbled incoherently about loving her knight more than anyone else; Shaula went on a rant about just how glad she was to be with her Master; Satella just muttered "I love you" on and on again like a broken record (thankfully, Envy, who happened to be in control, was equally drunk); Rem was the only one who did not change at all, as she did not actually drunk anything, yet she was even more hammered compared to the others. All four of them hugged the black-eyed boy rather tightly, as if he was a some prized treasure. Of course, no one paid attention to anyone's worlds, including the speakers themselves.

There were other cuddle piles, of course:

Otto, Garfiel, and even Frederica congratulated their brother on a quadruple wedding he had not yet had. The Gorgeous Tiger even thought about marrying his gray-haired bro to his half-sister, which neither of the two mentioned seemed to mind at all (Otto almost went in for the kiss just a minute ago, before Garfiel caught on).

Crusch and Felix were planning an expedition against the Black Serpent. So far, their plan involved screaming at the top of their lungs: "Where are you, you big, dumb snake!" and letting the Sage finish the job, but at least some thought was put into it.

Anastasia, Julius, Joshua and Ricardo sang "Hoshin of the Wastes" at the top of their lungs. That wouldn't have not been all too scandalous if the four were fully clothed. They were not. Echidna, who did not drink, decided to find out later if the fabled brewer the Sage had invested in had any offspring.

Liliana and Kiritaka sang along too, but they were physically separate from them, more specifically, they were atop of the one of the tables and half-covered with various food items from the said table.

The Pearlbaton triplets were bunched up together like a litter of homeless kittens. Turns out the Divine Protection of Trisection wasn't enough to share the alcohol-load down to a manageable size.

Astrea Juniors mourned their wife/mother/grandmother. It would be a touching scene if not for the self-deprecating attitude all three had towards themselves. What's more, they seemed to be a lot more closer to one another, more than any of the three would've been comfortable with whilst sober. Even Reinhard was a bit tipsy for the first time in his life, as the Divine Protection of Spirit Tolerance somehow could not hold against Subaru's perfect brew.

Ram eyes glowed red – the Clown was supercharging the red-haired oni with quintuple of her daily dose of mana. However, she did not mind that at all, in fact, she felt more alive than ever. Of course, her loud moaning as Roswaal continued cradling her certainly did not paint a pretty picture for the normally frigid and proud maid.

The Ton-Chin-Kan trio were scattered across the room: Gaston was asleep under a random table; Rachins laid on the one of the windowsills, front half outside, back inside; while Cambery was literally served on a platter in the place of a piglet with a red appa inside his mouth.

Reid hung by his robe from the chandelier, the result of his failed bet against Flugel. Even Volcanica was under the influence, spouting some ancient wisdom that no one cared a damn for.

Finally, the most weird pair were Felt and Priscilla. The former was literally on top of the latter in the most erotic pose imaginable – face right in the middle of her bosom, all the previous animosity between the two completely forgotten.

There were those who did not drink, of course – the "Loli Gang" and Schlut were evacuated at Sword Saint's insistence, before they too got drunk from the fumes. It was they, Beatrice more specifically, who decided to put an end to it.

"Subaru, look at what you did. Now everyone's as hammered as you are, in fact!"

"Beako, chilla-a-ax. Everyone's having fun!"

"What if the Witch Cult attacks right now?"

"I'll get them some more Pleiades Premium! That will fix that bitch Capella right up!"

"Urgh, at this rate, everyone here will have a hangover until the Royal Selection ends. What's then? Do you understand what your antics have done?"

"You know, Beako, you're right! 'lright people, no more drinkin'!"

"More drinkin'? 'f course, Captain! One more on da house!"

"Nah, no more. Everyone! Get fuckin' sober!"

As he said that, something truly bizarre happened.

-----

Greed.

For Subaru, it was one of his most prominent Sins. Aside from Envy, Greed was one of the Sins that Subaru was incredibly well attuned to. Ultimately, he never wanted to leave anyone behind. Even the people he did not particularly like, like Julius, Priscilla or Heinkel. Even the people who hurt him or tried to hurt him. But in doing so he was also did not want to become a bargaining chip to be discarded at the first sign of trouble. He wanted to save everyone, but also himself. In that way, he was very Greedy, more Greedy than anyone else in the world. The Sin of Greed was the endless desire to keep everything the one already possessed, often to the detriment of others. So the Greed manifested in him to help him fulfill his desire to keep every connection he made.

Cor Leonis.

In an instant, white blobs of light manifested in his field of vision, large and small. Through them, he saw every bond he made. He knew instinctively how to wield his new Authority and what he wanted to do with it. After activating it, he Greedily took on all the burdens of the people around him, purging them from the effects of alcohol.

"Nah, no more. Everyone! Get fuckin' sober!"

-----

The impact was immediate. Everyone's expressions quickly changed as they quickly separated from one another before anyone got any ideas. People silently and unanimously agreed not to mention of what had occurred minutes prior.

The only person who still remained inebriated collapsed to the ground.

"Ho-o-oly shit! It's like I just drank an entire crate in one go!"

"Subaru?"

Emilia was the first to notice that something was wrong.

"Urgh, fuck everythin' spinnin'… Ah, shit, fuck, that's bad, that's too much at once… Sry, Tella, I think I'm bein' a dumbass once again. My bad… I'll probably… see you so-o-on…"

The Sage collapsed.

-----

Thankfully, before Subaru went through another loop, the help had arrived (in the form of his spirit, his liege, his tiger friend, the blue-haired oni maid, and the demi-human knight). With some rather intense application of healing magic, the eccentric knight was resuscitated before everyone returned to the drunken stupor from the deactivation of his Authority and before he could perish from the alcohol poisoning.

"What did you do, in fact?"

"Yeah, you made everyone worried, you dunderhead!"

"Subaru-kun, please limit your drinking."

"Nah, Master was fine. He went through worse."

Satella was silent, as her hands gently stroked his head. She was merely happy that she did not have to see him die again.

"'lright, that was the we-e-eirdest way to manifest Greed."

"Wait, Natsuki-san, do you mean your Authority is literally just making everyone around you sober at your own expense?"

"That's…" "...rather stupid."

Julius did not voice that out loud.

"Nah, it isn't just that. It's take and pass around to whoever wants it. And also, it isn't just bo-o-oze. I can pro-o-obably take a pain from injuries, or fatiiigue, or maybe… Hey, Beako, check my mana."

"Sure… What? How? There's so much mana, in fact..."

"I'm linked with Tella's and Emilia's mana-pool. I'd figured they have the largest ones."

Now he wondered if he would be able to fuel someone already op like Reinhard with that amount of mana. Would he achieve the power singularity? It sounded terrifying.

"Ho-o-onestly, that's wa-a-ay better than Invisible Providence. Just have to make sure I don't take too-o-o much burden at once, and we'll be fi-i-ine. Moreover, I now have cool wall-hacks!"

"Wall-hacks?"

"Master can see people throw walls. That's what he means."

Of course, Shaula knew the shooter lingo by heart.

"Just friends. Still hella useful. Rein, can you get out of Priestella and back real quick? I wanna check out the range."

"Sure, Subaru."

The Sword Saint was glad that his friend had a power-up. In less than a minute, he left the city and then returned back.

"So, you vanished like twenty seconds in, that's… urgh... about... two or three kilometers, given your speed? That's quite go-o-o-o-od."

Most of the people around him were rather surprised about Subaru's ability to calculate something like that while being under the influence. Subaru, however, just made a rough estimation, based on the distance Reinhard had covered during one of his failed loops against Sirius.

-----

"So, what do ya intend to do now, "Great Sage"?"

"Hey what's with all the bitchin', 'nastasia?"

"I mean, ya kinda derailed our little banquet."

"Didn't you made the whole thing for politickin', to get under my skin?"

The Merchant Princess' eyes widened.

"Did he catch on? Echidna, ya shoulda been more subtle."

"What, you thought I was blind to you goadin' Emilia-tan, Otto, and everyone else? I know what you wa-a-anted. So, how's it now? Satisfied?"

"…"

"That's right. Fuckin' politicians. Fix the damn country first! Makes me want to go revolutionary on 'alf of your asses... You know, I'm kinda tired of this Lugunica mess. 'ey, Volc?"

"Yes, friend Flugel?"

"How about we freeze the whole Royal Selection business. Until I unfuck all of this."

"I do not mind, dear friend."

"Wait, what?"

Anastasia, Crusch and Priscilla looked at the Sage like at some lunatic. Emilia and Felt both smiled. Subaru was eccentric, but he always had good ideas.

"Rein, do you think we should tag along?"

"We should, Subaru is about to start something great, I think."

"Yeah, me too."

The two murmuring already chose their side.

"I mean, what are you gonna do about it? Brin' me a strongly worded letter? You think I can't become a big fish if I wanna? Gimme a year or two, and I can get richer than everyone here combined!"

In some other universe, the Purge King had a sudden sneezing fit. He looked from side to side and frantically searched for an assailant that cursed him, but after a while he recognized that no one was there. The sneezing was due to the throne room being a bit colder than usual today. He was safe… for now.

"Urgh, I need to get to Emilia-tan to calm my nerves..."

-----

"'lright, I now officially declare the start of Operation "Unfuck the World"!"

A few eyebrows were raised at the name.

"First, the crew and I are going to the Watchtower to check it out. Ma-a-aybe I left somethin' useful in there."

The members of the "Old Crew" nodded in acknowledgment.

"Second, all the people here are gonna fix the mess that the royal family left this state in. I'll introduce universal education, hea-a-althcare, curtail the corrupt nobles, get a proper military to not rely on Volcanica, patch up the eco-o-onomy, all that jazz. Might as well kick-start the Industrial Revolution while I'm at it."

That seemed to caught the attention of all the Royal Candidates. Emilia and Felt liked the idea of universal schools and hospitals along with noble restructuring. Crusch liked the idea of proper state military, Anastasia was rather curious about Sage's economic innovations, while Priscilla was quite interested what the words "Industrial Revolution" meant.

"Third, we do the same e-e-everywhere else, Vollachia, Gusteko, Kararagi, no exceptions. From my understandin', all four are a bunch of hellholes with tons of problems of their own."

"Somewhere down the line, we put Pandora and the Witch Cult on the stake for ruinin' our stuff. I'll get Authorities, and the wo-o-orld will be better for it. When I'm done with that, I'll fix up the mess with Tella. Then no one will have an excuse to be racist anymore."

Quite a few people smiled at that declaration.

"And then we can declare ha-a-appily ever after. Oh, I almost forgot... the fancy swords, let's get these too, they look co-o-o-ol."

The last bit caused the party to burst out laughing. One after another, each party member joined the Drunken Sage's mad plan.

And so the Operation "Unfuck the World" truly began.

Chapter Text

"Here, take this. It should help with da inebriation. Well, probably not all of it, as ya drank a lot. No need to pay me for it. Free of charge."

"You know, when a peddler like you gives somethin' away for free, it feels like you're just tryin' to poison me." "Not that it would work on me specifically, but still."

"Hey, ya are an important business partner, first and foremost."

"Lady Anastasia, do you have any more sobriety potions? Everyone staying here should probably take them. Before the effects of Subaru's Authority fade due to proximity."

Reinhard did not mention that he nearly stumbled due to the tipsiness returning when he was measuring the distance of Subaru's strange ability.

"Thank the Od Lagna for the Divine Protection of Perfect Posture."

"Oh, yeah. Got a few."

Once, Anastasia had been swindled out of around half of her yearly business profits because she happened to be under the influence. Ever since then, she always carried a few of those with her.

"It would be bad if everyone here went back to what they were doin' prior..."

Most of the people in the room shuddered at the thought. Especially Felt and Priscilla.

-----

"These things are called cogs. Essentially, wheels with tines or prongs, whatever. Because those slot in into one another, one rotation of the big one is a multiple of the small ones. You can use a metal spring that looks like this to conserve energy and turn these cogs gradually over time. You can measure time more precisely than in hours by using dial hands. This is very basic mechanics, it should be doable en masse even at our level of production..."

"Now, the combustion engine looks kinda like that. Right here, in the cylinder, liquid fuel is injected. It is ignited, and as it burns, it emits gas. Said gas forces the piston up. Through these levers, the motion is transmitted to the wheel. This wheel can be connected to anything: a mill, a carriage, anything really. Alternatively, you can instead use water instead of fuel, but you need the external heat source, that's called a steam engine instead. You can also replace these levers with the turbine instead. It's like the water wheel, but for steam..."

"If I remember correctly, the correct formula for gunpowder is three-fourths saltpeter, one-tenth sulfur, one-seventh charcoal. You grind it up, mix it carefully, ignite and then boom! Overall, the cost should be less than those metias or mana stones. We found two primary military uses for it: one is to just clump bunch up for a one boom, or to use tiny portions to throw small projectiles at the enemy. You put some powder in this metal pipe, slot a bullet (that's what we call these metal balls), ignite the powder, and then boom. You can make a big one too, it would work much like your magic cannons. You know, the ones you, Crusch, brought on the Whale hunt..."

"Simple things like mass literacy, good medicine, tolerant laws, et cetera, help society a lot. The more people you have who are well fed, literate, healthy and happy, the more hands you have for business. Among them, you'll have more qualified specialists, artists, scientists, bureaucrats. You know, the type of people who push society forward. Essentially, by shoving people into the fields or into the slums, you waste a ton of potential..."

"Animals are often vectors of disease just as much as people themselves. Rats, insects, birds. Even livestock. One particular advice to avoid malaise is to keep yourself and your environment clean, boil water, cook food thoroughly. Hygiene is incredibly important, especially if you are trying to treat someone, so clean your hands before you stitch someone. Alcohol can be used to disinfect wounds, as can a particular type of fungus found in mold…"

-----

Anastasia wrote things down with a mad vigor. This was just the surface level, according to the boy, yet all these ideas could flip the world upside down. She, Julius and Joshua were so concentrated on the lecture that they forgot to blink. Giving him a sobriety potion when he began spouting about the things he wanted to change, was one of the greatest ideas in her life. He still wasn't exactly sober (as it turned out, they all drank quite a lot of booze today), which was evident by the shakiness in his illustrations, but it was good enough for the Merchant Princess.

Everyone else also had something to learn. Even if some did not write down everything Subaru said, they still listened attentively, even Priscilla, despite her best efforts to appear indifferent, memorized the Sage's words.

"That's homework. The crew and I will go back to my old home while you are figuring out these things. Oh, wait a second, there's one more thing I wanted to do."

-----

She sat on an old chair, bound with the heavy chains. The room she was placed in was an old, dingy cellar. It wasn't as secure as the Capital's dungeons, where she would be moved to in a few days. Not that her current position gave her any chance of escaping on her own. The air was so full of dust that it irritated the lungs, but that did not bother her at all. As for the reason why, that was because:

"Petelgeuse, my beloved."

"You kno-o-ow, I am gettin' really tired of this bullshit. Really tired of a-a-all of you cultists."

The irritation was quite noticeable in Subaru's drunken voice.

"I'm sorry I'm being bothersome. And thank you for visiting me, dear."

"See, tha-a-at's what I am fuckin' talkin' about."

With a sudden movement, the black-eyed knight closed the distance, forced her mouth open, and then jammed the bottle of Pleiades Premium into it.

"There, that should render you harmless. Che-e-ers!"

"Mrgh! Gulp, gulp, gulp."

"You know, we have no-o-o reason to keep you alive."

"..."

"The Gluttony issue has kinda resolved itself, mo-o-ostly. And I know it's useless to ask you about Capella's victims. I have a better chance whackin' her with Reid… Or ma-a-aybe Yang Sword is better..."

"…"

"So the only thin' I still need from you is your Witch Factor. Your Wrath."

"M-m-m… gulp..."

"That means just killin' you cleanly, without collateral damage. That's where Pleeeiades Premium comes into play."

"..."

"This shit is so strong, it's enough to pacify the Witch of Envy, appa-a-arently. Even Volc and Rein were under the influence. So me forcin' you to drink this, is just a way to numb you to the point 'till you can't even think."

"..."

"A bit of an insane plan, I do agree, but I'm the only one who has so-o-ome tolerance to it. So yeah, even your Authority would not do much."

"Urgh…"

"Oh, you're done. Unfo-o-ortunately, that was the last bottle, but we're going to the tower for a couple more crates. This is just a preview."

The knights eyes held a malevolent expression.

"Wait, dear… please… come back… I know you are still in there, Petel-"

Slap!

"I repeat this again, I am not him! This whole drama has so much unrequited love it makes me fuckin' si-i-ick! I murdered your dear hubby a year ago and took his shit, that fuckin' Sloth! That bastard tried to please my girl Tella by killin' the other girl I like, not even knowin' she would never even look in his direction. You are the exact same, just some du-u-umb bitch, that keeps ruinin' my happy endin'! All of you bastards are like that!"

"…"

The Wrath continued to look at him longingly, urging him to stay, just as he turned away from her.

"I might've taken a small piece of him along the way, but there's no wa-a-ay to brin' him back anymore. Not that I'd ever do that, even if I could. Emilia says he was nice at some point, but she doesn't understand what I went through because of him…"

The last sentence was barely audible, mostly addressed to himself. And so, with that, he left the cellar.

-----

"Urgh. Fuckin' hate this shit…"

"Subaru?"

"Oh, I'm done, Emilia-tan. We can go to the tower soon."

The half-elf Royal Candidate met her knight right after he left Wrath's temporary containment cell.

"You look re-e-ealy upset. What happened?"

"Ah, sry. Just all this shit so far has been very frustratin'. Makes me jittery. And I'm also out of whiskey."

"He-he, I think you drank about three quarters of the crate all on your own back there. Not to mention your Authority… I'm sure it would be good for you to lay off for a while."

"No way! The se-e-econd we in there, I'm breakin' into Asterope for more stuff."

"Oh, Subaru, you nincompoop, you're insufferable sometimes…"

Emilia's words did not match her affectionate expression. Something had occurred within her mind when Satella and others arrived at the party.

"I'll definitely tell him. Just not right now, after, when he's in a sound mind…"

"No one says that anymore, Emilia-tan."

Said affectionate expression was quickly noticed by her knight.

"She's so adorable… E.M.T."

-----

The two lovebirds soon returned to the city hall. The preparations for the departure of Subaru and his companions were nearly complete. The party, however, was still in full swing, although at this point, thanks to Sage's knowledge, it was more akin to a business meeting.

"Natsuki-kun, I have already sent a missive to my contacts. Ya can expect prototypes for the fine tunin' in a month."

"That's quick. Hu-u-uh..."

"Time is money, like Hoshin said."

"Pretty sure that came from me. My home, that is."

"Oh, right. The Hoshin's legacy is yo legacy. Explains why ya like the Kararagi culture so much."

"Hey, I'm not claimin' it back. The only bit of history I wa-a-ant to rewrite is a conundrum with Tella."

"Nii-chan, we can all push for some legislative changes to be implemented. Let's have a trial run in our domains and when they are successful, we can make those pansy nobles change some laws."

"Mhm, good idea, Felt."

"So, Flugel. Who do ya wanna take?"

"Well, everyone from the old crew: you Reid, Tella, Volc, Shaula; then add to that Beako, Rem and Emilia-tan, and that sho-o-ould be enough."

"Captain, what 'bout everyone else?"

"Nah, you all take care of the mess the Cult left Prieste-e-ella first, then we can work on the next step of the whole "Unfuck the World" thin'. I kinda thought Meili might be useful for witchbeast control, but with our lineup we can pro-o-obably just brute force through any conflict. It also makes no sense to leave Priestella undefended."

"You don't want to go full force, Nii-chan? I can even lend you Rein if you really want."

The Sword Saint nodded. In truth, Reinhard wanted to join the expedition, but he put his mistress' safety first. He will stay unless she commands him to join the Sage's efforts. In any case, he still lent Subaru the Dragon Sword.

"I mean, it's just a short trip to the old home and back, what's the worst that can happen?"

"That's a flag, in fact."

"Yep, Master, you just set off a flag."

"Ah, fuck… you're right."

In another reality Natsuki Subaru was surprised by his sudden sneezing fit. It was strange. Was it something that "Natsuki Subaru" had too? Maybe he was just cold. After ruffling his white hair, he drew a bit closer to the campfire that Shaula had made.

"Natsuki-kun, can Julius and I tag along?"

"M-m-m? I'm not gonna let you ransack my crib."

"You should not worry, Subaru, we are merely interested in exploration of the tower. It would also be nice to document the journey."

Julius, being the history nerd, was of course interested to join.

"Eh, sure… Why not. But if I see you nabbin' my stuff… well, we're gonna have some issues. 'lright, I have a dibs on the front seat. I always wanted to pilot a Dragon."

"Natsuki-san, drunk driving is a criminal offense in Lugunica."

"Does that mean you are a wanted man then?"

"E-e-eh, well, I am, but…"

Otto decided to shut up. In truth, he was indeed wanted back in his hometown. If you add up the rumors that he had burned down the old Mathers' manor to get paid, it made him look like a pretty ruthless criminal indeed.

"Don't worry, guys, all he has to do is to occasionally point Volc in da correct direction and wake him up when he falls asleep."

"I promise thee that I will remain awaketh for our journey back."

"'lright, Beako, you sit in front of me."

Beatrice nodded with a smug expression. As it was expected from Betty's contractor, she was given the best possible seat – right in her contractor's arms.

"Everyone else, pick whatever order you like."

"Alright, I am going to be behind my knight."

"No, I will be behind my love!"

"No, I will be behind Subaru-kun!"

"No, I will be behind Master!"

The argument went on for quite a while. All the four women refused to yield. Eventually, the Sage intervened.

"Since no one can come to an agreement, my buddy Reid will sit behind me."

The four were a bit upset by this decision, but at least there was no favoritism.

"Yeah, Captain! Bros before hoes!"

"Garf!"

"Disgusting."

"That was mean, Garf."

Frederica, Ram and Mimi all scolded Garfiel in unison.

"Dug yourself into that one."

"Hey! I was backin' ya up, Captain!"

-----

The journey took less than an hour and was rather uneventful. Apart from the surprised expressions of the citizens when they flew past the Capital, and Volcanica falling asleep and almost crashing into the Royal Palace, nothing too crazy had happened along the way. (In Subaru's opinion, Anastasia and Julius thought otherwise). He did make a tiny mishap of turning Volc in the wrong direction for a bit, but it did not cause too much of a delay. The barrier blocking the entry to the Tower was bypassed rather quickly with a simple E.M.T./S.M.T., and the witchbeasts surrounding the place were simply avoided by flying over them.

"We are arriving at at Pleiades Airport at 2:00 a.m. Standard Lugunica time. Thank you for choosing Sage Airlines. This was your flight attendant Shaula, signing off."

-----

Eventually, after a brief journey, the ones assembled were right at the front door of the the Sage's old home.

"This door is rather huge. Divine Dragon, could ya please lend as a hand?"

"There is no need to involve Volcanica. I can open this door too."

"So can I. Master, may I do the honors?"

"No, just let my love do it."

While Emilia and Shaula volunteered for the grunt work, Satella actually knew the secret behind the massive door.

"Satella-sama? This door looks quite heavy, I believe Subaru's strength alone would not be enough."

"Nah, he'll be fine, it's his door. Flugel just loves to show off. He even rigged the door to recognize him."

Reid knew about the secret too.

"'lright. Let me try-y-y."

It was surprisingly lighter than it looked, at least for the Sage. He was done rather quickly.

"I do not fiteth inside, friend. Shouldst thee wisheth to join myself in conversation, thou must meet me atop of the tower."

"'ey, Volc, slow down, take me with ya."

"Reid? The fuck are you leavin' us for?"

"Wanna have a nap. This hot body is made of mana. Can't stay away from da tower too long. I'll be at Electra as usual."

"Oh, that's just like Ryuzus, I guess. 'lright, see you two soon."

As the remaining eight entered the ground floor, the busty Scorpio Apprentice made a theatrical bow and said:

"Welcome to the Great Library Pleiades, or your home, Master! This is Celaeno."

The Sage's companions (with the exception of Satella and Shaula, who knew the place) all gawked at the impressive structure of the place. The Sage, however, looked at the never-ending stairs with frustration and exclaimed:

"Ah, for fu-u-uck's sake, where is the elevator!"

Chapter Text

"'lright, Tella, Beako you both are on e-e-elevator duty, the second 'nastasia and I figure out the logistics out, we'll make a proper one here. Everyone else, settle down on Alcyone, Julius and I are goin' to Asterope for some dri-i-inks."

"Subaru? What do you need me for?"

"What, you're expect me to carry the whole crate, you jerk? No way! Shaula, did you and Reid leave the secret door to the stash open?"

"Yep, we did. You should have no problems finding it, Master."

"Nice. Let's go. Tella-tan, be ready to Murak us when we get the cra-a-ate."

-----

"Silver Beauty. Aurora. Solar Eclipse. Constellation. That certainly sounds like you named these, Subaru."

"I mean, you heard Reid. It was mine enterprise. Stars and space are kinda my thin'. Oh, there it is! The who-o-ole keg of the best stuff!"

Before the Sage stood a large drum, twice his height, labeled "Pleiades Premium".

"We can not carry that out, Subaru."

"Urgh, you're right… Gotta try some of it tho-o-o."

Before Julius could object, Subaru went under the tap attached to the keg and turned it, but:

"Argh, nothin'! It's all go-o-one..."

Unlike the Sage, Julius heard an odd click, when the former had turned the tap. He wanted to warn Subaru that it might be a trap, but he was too late to do so. The wall of the keg suddenly opened, toppling the black-eyed knight in the process.

"Is that another secret door?"

Julius was flabbergasted by the redundancy of placing a secret door behind the another secret door. The Sage, however, was not.

"Oh, cool. That's somethin' old me pro-o-obably made on a whim. Now wha-a-at could I leave in here?"

The interior of the keg-shaped secret room was very dark, unnaturally dark. Julius experienced an odd feeling of discomfort, as if someone was watching him from within. Subaru, however, looked completely unfazed.

Before the purple-haired knight could object:

"Oh, there's somethin' in there. Check this out."

With that, Subaru vanished into the darkness.

-----

At the same time in Alcyone, Shaula gave a tour of the fourth floor to Emilia, Anastasia, Rem and Beatrice, the latter joining them after she had lifted them up the stairs with Murak. Of course, Anastasia was already asking questions.

"Damn, this construction is fascinatin', I mean da height of da structure is somethin' else. What is it made of?"

"Concrete, reinforced by the steel beams and mana. Master's doing, he brought like a month worth of iron supply from the village called Costuul to make the support beams. Plus, a ton of magic was used to assist the structure."

"Betty's Subaru may look foolish at times, but he possesses incredible wisdom, in fact."

No one objected to the spirit's praise.

"Wait, Costuul?"

"It's a simple mining village in the north of what you now call Lugunica."

"Yeah, we know Costuul, it's just that it became a city durin' these four centuries."

"Oh, right. The Capital looked rather big too. Master's efforts there were quite fruitful. It used to be such a shithole."

"It's still mostly a shithole. As a businesswoman, I'll give you a tip: I'd stay away from anywhere, but da Noble district. Especially the Slums."

"The Slums are pretty dangerous, but the Noble and Merchant districts are re-e-ealy pretty."

Emilia remembered an incident when she, Felt, Rom and Subaru were nearly killed in the Slums. She didn't have anything against the Merchant district, however.

"Wasn't yo knight almost mugged in da Merchant district? If it wasn't for Reinhard, he probably would have gotten a a shank in his back and bled out right there near the street."

After some consideration, Emilia was convinced by Anastasia's opinion. Her insignia had been stolen there. Maybe the Merchant district wasn't particularly safe either.

"So how come da whole thin' did not just crumble in four centuries?"

"Everything that Master has built can stand for millennia. There's a spatial Yin magic involved in construction. It makes sure that the concrete doesn't fall apart or the beams don't become covered in rust. It's similar to the barrier we bypassed on the way here. There's a large mana-focusing crystal embedded in the lower levels of Asterope that powers the whole thing."

"The past Subaru-kun must have been a very talented mage. Unfortunately, our Subaru-kun has a rather fragile gate."

"It's broken actually, Rem."

"Oh? When?"

"After we lost you. During the events of Sanctuary. He has to rely on Beatrice for mana management."

"Betty is all too kind to assist her contractor in that regard."

"I see..."

"Sanctuary? What Sanctuary?"

Her spirit told tell Anastasia that this secret place had been mentioned a couple of times during past conversations between members of the Emilia Camp. Whatever this Sanctuary was, it was clearly important.

"That's classified information of the Mathers' domain and the Emilia Camp, Anastasia-sama."

"Don't shove your nose where it doesn't belong, merchant."

Neither Beatrice nor Rem appreciated Anastasia's curiosity.

"Ah, 'lright. Keep yo secrets."

"Master was never particularly strong with magic, tho. But he had some really good ideas, they were usually implemented by Tella-san and Echidna-san."

"Betty's Subaru has a unique understanding of Yin potential, I suppose."

E.M.T. and E.M.M. were but only one result of Subaru's creativity.

"Mhm, Subaru helped me to master my ice magic too."

Subaru also helped Emilia to unlock her true potential in Ice Brand Arts.

"Fascinatin'... What's with da healin' spirit?"

"Oh, Master has always been good with spirits, that little blonde ankle-biter is not the first one he had contract with. I wonder if that Crybaby Geuse is still around, I did not see him at the party…"

"Geuse as in Petelgeuse?"

Emilia, Rem, Beatrice and Anastasia all turned to Shaula with surprised expressions.

"Yeah. But we just called him Crybaby."

"Natsuki-kun killed him a year ago."

"Oh? Why? I thought he'd be with him again. Since Master got his Sloth back, I thought Crybaby was on Master's team."

"It's difficult to explain… He… he was driven mad… and was aiming to kill me. He became the Sin Archbishop of Sloth."

"Ah, so that dumbass took in the Sloth like a complete idiot?! Master said to gather it when Sechmet kicks the bucket and keep it for him. That Crybaby always messes things up!"

"He… was desperate. Don't blame him, please."

Emilia knew he had done so to protect her. Even if it ended so terribly, his intentions were noble. Beatrice grieved for an old friend too.

"Well, at least Master got it back. Still, what a dummy!"

-----

A few tense seconds later, Subaru emerged wielding a blade in his right hand and a small wooden chest in his left.

"I found another sword!"

The edge was shrouded in a complete darkness that leaked from it in the form of black fog. Unlike the Dragon or Yang Sword, this one was curved, resembling a scimitar rather than a typical blade. A bat made from dark metal was nested in the handle of the sword. Julius knew of only one weapon that could fit that description.

"Why is it placed inside a whiskey keg? Urgh, why am I even asking this question? Of course someone like you would put it in there."

"Eh, sounds just like me. I used to hide my etchi manga inside a shoebox. Never got caught. 'lright, anyway, check this out!"

Swish! The affected target wasn't all too surprising at this point. A small table in the corner of the cellar was cleanly split in half. Yet another innocent victim.

"What's with you and destroying the furniture? This is like an overused gag at this point."

"Hey, have you ever tried breakin' somethin'? Ve-e-ery therapeutic. Or settin' things on fire, that's pretty calmin' too. 'lright, durin' the next meetin' between Anastasia and Emilia, I'll drag you out to burn some stuff."

"You know, Subaru. I feel like the alcohol has awakened out someone else in you. I feel like this new-you is really unhinged."

"Your master playin' politics has awakened someone else in me. Or whoever possessed her, anyway."

"Wait, what? What do you mean? Who possessed Anastasia-sama?"

"You didn't figure it out? She was acting we-e-eird ever since you lost your name. Even her a-a-accent was a bit off. I assumed someone was possessin' her. Probably the spirit on her neck."

"Spirit? What spirit, Subaru, how do you know that?"

"You don't? Some spirit knight, I swe-e-ear. The Finest, my ass. Don't you like have a decent enough affinity?"

"Ah, that must be it. You do have a quite strong spiritual affinity."

"I mean, that's not the only thin'. There are some contextual clues too. Look, even in Lugunica's climate, she has never parted with that "sca-a-arf", and she always caresses it regularly. Like it's not just a clothin' item, but like a pet or somthin'. My spirit partnership with Beako is very similar, I can't have her away from me for too long or shit's gonna get bad... Not that I want to, Beako is the cutest. So, yeah... But don't wo-o-orry, ever since your name came back, she's back to normal."

Julius was bewildered.

"How could I not notice that?!"

The cut left a distortion in space, as if the blade had sliced straight through the fabric of reality. Noticing that, Subaru chuckled:

"Oooh! That's cool as fuck! That's like a… hole in space! This reminds me of that light no-o-ovel with the skeleton guy… He had this cool space splittin' attack… He had a lot of cool magic, like he would demolish even Roswaal one-on-one. And a bunch of cool looking minions… You know, undead, demons, giants, all kinds of monsters. What was his name?.. Eh, whatever... Triple Maximized Reality Slash! Ye-e-eah!"

With three motions, he formed a triangular hole in the fabric of space, creating something akin to the portal.

"...Still, what a dummy!"

"Subaru?"

"Oh, hey, girls. I made a hole in a reality."

"What?"

"It's like Al Shamak or Door Crossin', but co-o-oler, I guess."

"How?"

"Oh, it's just this thin'. I'll call it a Po-o-ortal Gun. Wait, Gun? Nah, maybe Blade? Portal Blade… nah, Edge… no, that's bad too, Space Splitter… no not space, Reality as a first word fits better... But the second... Reality Splitter sounds terrible... Wait, there! I got it! Reality Slasher! Yeah, that's sounds cool and edgy."

"Subaru-kun? What is going on?"

"Wait, Master, you already have this thing?"

"Yeah, I found it in the cellar."

Without any concern, he crossed through the said hole and took with him a bottle of Silver Beauty (he actually liked that one a lot, it had a very pleasant and sweet aftertaste).

"Oi! Go through, Julius! Don't waste my time!"

Julius soon followed with the chest that Subaru had forgotten about. Satella, who was watching the whole situation via her link with the Sage, had appeared out of the thin air and joined them as well.

-----

"That is the Yin Sword. Or Shadow Sword, if you prefer."

"Reality Slasher."

Julius sighed. In the dining hall in Alcyone, the party assembled to discuss the discovery.

"Are you sure, knight?"

"I am certain, Beatrice-sama."

Julius had spent years in the library, studying the history of Lugunica. The legendary blades, however, were more akin to a childhood passion for him. He knew what they looked like, their abilities, and even some of the people who had the opportunity to wield them. From the history of the Yin Sword, only a name and a vague description were known.

"Master, you never told me that you left it here! I thought you scattered your sword collection across the world."

"Hell if I know. I mighta left it here for the future. Tella-tan, would you happen to know?"

"No, I thought you sent it to Kararagi."

"Well, I might as well use it. It's quite co-o-ol, actually. The other two are sick as well, but thi-i-is one is more my style. I love thinkin' with portals."

Before anyone could object, he made a series of slashes and vanished from the room in a portal, that closed the second he left.

"A-a-and I'm gone. Ha!"

His muted voice came from behind the door to the room. His liege immediately went after him.

"Subaru, stop playing around! This… blade looks re-e-ealy dangerous!"

There was a strange dark aura around the blade, something Emilia had not failed to notice.

"Ha-ha, I can't stop, Emilia-tan! This is wa-a-ay to fun! Beho-o-old the power of the Reality Slasher!"

"Is that thing even safe? I don't want Subaru-kun to disappear somewhere and never come back."

"I can attest to the safety of these portals, Rem-san. At least that part of the Yin Sword is safe."

"Betty can as well, in fact. They are somewhat similar to Betty's own Door Crossing, I suppose."

"Still, you feel the eerie aura around the blade too, right?"

"I do, ever since Subaru first discovered it."

"Yeah, that blade is quite creepy. Ya all better be on guard."

"It's a tad bit frightening, but Master never had any issues wielding it."

"Betty doesn't feel anything odd, in fact."

"This is an issue of mana misalignment. Neither I, my love, nor Betty seem to feel it."

"Hm, that could be the case, I suppose."

Subaru dashed from one place to another, drunk on power (and Silver Beauty). Between his skills with the Guiltywhip (he used it to gain more speed) and the portals, it was almost impossible to catch him. Eventually, his excitement wore off and he returned.

"I also found the-e-ese."

He pointed to the clothes inside the opened chest – a black robe and pants with yellow-orange highlights, a striped scarf with a similar color pattern, knee-high boots, and fingerless gloves.

"That's my old stuff, ri-i-ight?"

"Yep, Master."

"Yes, dear."

"Looks kinda cool. Old me had so-o-ome taste."

Satella really liked these, as she helped him make them, but overall, she preferred his tracksuit more.

"It's iconic."

In a couple of minutes, he changed into the new (old) getup.

"So, ho-o-ow do I look?"

"That's... actually suits you a lot, Subaru."

"Yep, the old-ya had some style, Natsuki-kun."

"Betty's Subaru is stylish in anything he wears, in fact."

The other four women also nodded in unison. The opinions of the four ranged from the "very handsome" to the "drop-dead gorgeous".

"'lright, let's check out my first trial."

-----

"Urgh, why is it a-a-all white! What idiot desi-i-igned… Oh, never mind..."

Before the group stood an endless expanse of white with a black stone Monolith in the middle.

"Well, touch the thin', then do somethin', I guess."

Without any concern, Subaru bumped his lobe into the stone slab, starting the trial. Beatrice immediately channeled her healing magic before the Sage could grow a lump. One Monolith became two, then three, and soon countless Monoliths were scattered across the endless white expanse.

"Touch the brightest of the hero destroyed by Shaula."

"Shaula? Miss, can you please provide us any clues?"

"Nope, that's against the rules. But it's not like I have a solution either. Master never told me about this."

"Satella-sama, do you have a clue?"

"The trial is designed for him by him. Only my love can solve it."

It took the Sage less than ten seconds:

"Ah, I figured it out! Sta-a-ar puzzles. So, since it's Shaula, that's a Scorpius constellation. Hm, that me-e-eans the hero destroyed is likely Orion, and the brightest is e-e-either Rigel or Betelgeuse. Eh, I guess Rigel shines more consistently."

The people around him were confused by the sudden mention of the Sin Archbishop of Sloth.

"Now, which one of the-e-ese rocks is Rigel? Beako, Tella, can either of you gimme a lift?"

"Murak."

After a minute in the air:

"Ah, there it is. The big ones fo-o-orm the Orion, so that's the one."

As the Emilia, Beatrice, Rem, Anastasia and Julius looked at him with surprised expressions, he descended, touched the Monolith and then:

"Bam, easy."

The first trial was complete.

-----

Good. Evil. Father. Axe. Execution. Sin. Punishment. Dilemma. Answer. Guilt. Sin. Penance. Forgiveness. Heart. Consciousness. Judgment. Question. Answers. Judgment. Pieces. Fragments. Sinners. Father. Desire. Justice. Pride. Sins. Witches. Companionship. City. Wonder. Emptiness. Water. Trap. Drowning. Death.

-----

Arrival. Wonder. Confusion. Frustration. Fear. Hope. Disappointment. Confidence. Fear. Regret. Pain. Pain. Pain. Voice. Hope. Beauty. Spirit. Embarrassment. Gratitude. Debt. Companionship. Confidence. Failure. Name. Satella. Child. Coin. Path. Spirits. Fascination. Beauty. Affection. Bravery. Foolishness. Darkness. Body. Fear. Voice. Fear. Hot. Pain. Blood. Fear. Run. Scream. Body. Blood. Dying. Regret. Guilt. Hand. Warmth. Save. You. Death.

-----

Loneliness. Wonder. Meeting. Fascination. Companionship. Belonging. Journey. Master. Tragedy. Powerlessness. Guilt. Request. Diligence. Community. Tribe. Woman. Kinship. Guilt. Child. Reminiscence. Guilt. Tears. Empathy. Gratitude. Companionship. Threat. Desperation. Apology. Sloth. Anger. Powerlessness. Dread. Affection. Woman. Anger. Sloth. Woman. Hate. Death. Woman. Child. Death. Regret. Snow. Love. Brain. Trembling. Diligence. Sloth. Fingers. Diligence. Sloth. Love. Satella. Impostor. Ordeal. Boy. Love. Pride. Surprise. Frustration. Knight. Anger. Diligence. Failure. Sloth. Boy. Love. Satella. Pain. Failure. Boy. Fire. Gospel. Brain. Trembling. Death.

-----

One book after another, Subaru spent hours searching through his archive. Thanks to Satella, who quietly informed him about the contents of the library, he managed to dissuade everyone else from reading the books of the dead. So far, he made a few discoveries:

First, the books included all the dead, including his own failed loops.

Second, the books required an initial knowledge of the deceased. The more you know, the more you get. Memories of Typhon or Petelgeuse were rather surface level, while his own first loop in Lugunica was so vivid, that he literally reexperienced his first day all over again.

Third, even so much as touching the books could trigger the memories, so the others were prevented from doing so.

Fourth, sometimes the feelings of the deceased lingered, so someone with a fragile mind could be theoretically be overtaken by the thoughts of the person in the book. One more reason to prevent others from reading the books.

Fifth, if anyone bar himself or Satella reads his books, he will have to restart. He was certain that Envy would be very angry in such a case. Also, his own books could be located by Cor Leonis, something that he found out by activating it on a whim.

Sixth, the books were nearly endless. Finding someone specific might take days, if not months.

Seventh, there might be a book (or books) of the old-him somewhere in here.

Eighth, Petelgeuse wasn't as bad as he thought, at least before his madness. Emilia's words were pretty much proven by Sloth's own memories.

Ninth, drinking immediately after, was a good way to numb the pressure that lingering memories created.

Of course, every time people were concerned about him reading these, especially after he collapsed while reading the first, but it was somewhat easier, than experiencing death first hand, like he used to.

-----

"Reid Astrea. Subaru, take a look at this one."

"Wait, Reid's book? Oh, right, he to-o-old be that original flesh and blood Reid is dead. But he should still be considered ali-i-ive now, right? What do you think, Julius?"

"I'm not sure. I wonder what this book will show you then."

"Hm, I don't have too much knowledge about him in this life, so it will probably be like Geuse or Typhon."

Before consulting anyone else, Subaru touched the book and then…

-----

He opened his eyes to the expanse of white.

"Another white room? Are you fuckin' serious?"

"Hello there. Not many visit us, tsu."

Before she could continue, however, she was swept her off her feet.

"Not today! You think I'm just gonna let you snatch my me-e-emories like that? Beako told me all 'bout you. Ha!"

Pinning her to the white floor with Invisible Providence, Subaru had already declared his victory. A bit preemptively. Suddenly, the Sin Archbishop disappeared from view. Then she reappeared behind him, preparing for the biggest meal of her life, however:

"Sucker Punch! Trust me, I'm the last person who you'd want to eat. E-e-envy will make your life a livin' hell. And mine by extension as we-e-ell. So, don't."

With a whoosh, Louis disappeared again, but:

"Bam! No, se-e-eriously, my life is the last thin' you want to experience. As the unluckiest pe-e-erson in the world, I can absolu-u-utely attest to that."

"Let us have you, tsu. We already feel our brothers within you."

"It's that Sirius bullshit again, huh? Yes, I to-o-ok their Witch Factors, no, I'm not givin' them back!"

"We only wish for a perfect life. A life to experience everything that is in this world. Your life. Without you, we can't escape this prison, tsu."

Eventually, the Sin Archbishop finally got the upper hand. With his whip as a back up and the Yin and Yang blades (the Sage left the Dragon Sword back at Alcyone), Subaru put up a solid fight, but between his drunken flailing and Louis' relentless teleportation, the Archbishop eventually created an opening.

"Natsuki Subaru. Thank you for the meal, tsu."

Ever since her brothers had died, she had been starving for anything, anyone. As she licked her hand, she expected the most delicious memories in the existence, something that truly would make her fulfilled. Satiated. This, however, had not happened.

-----

Envy.

It was the Sin he was most attached to. If Envy hadn't been associated with Satella, he could've been considered the Sin Archbishop representing Envy, or the Warlock of Envy, whatever title one would prefer.

Envy ultimately permeated through Subaru's entire life. He Envied his father for being an amazing person, he Envied his mother for her kindness and the peaceful life she managed to achieve. He Envied his classmates who each found something they were successful at, while he was ok at everything, but never good at any one thing. He Envied the couples who passed him on the street for being happy, he Envied the people on TV and social media because they were charismatic, successful and attractive people, unlike him, he Envied the characters in the Isekai Light Novels he read who achieved success in the other world, while he was stuck in his room. He Envied, Envied and Envied again.

His Envy did not disappear when he was transported to Lugunica as well. He Envied the type of people like Satella, Reid, Volcanica or Reinhard for being so absurdly strong, he Envied the knights, the noubles and the Council of Elders for being born into a position of power, he Envied the Royal Candidates for being capable of changing the world, even the people close to him, he Envied for one reason or another – Emilia, Beatrice, Rem, Ram, Garfiel, Otto, Roswaal, Petra, Frederica, all of them. He even Envied the simple folk for having lives where stuff around them did not hinge on their efforts as much as it did for him. And, of course, he Envied the Sin Archbishops and the Witches too.

Envy was such a defining trait of his character that if one were to peer into his mind and search through all of his insecurities, and all of the memories he had collected throughout his journey, he would definitely be branded as a utterly deranged, insane, delusional madman, someone truly worthy of the title of Sin Archbishop or Warlock of Sin. After all, no one else could experience what he put himself into and remain intact.

Of course, in reality, it was just a delusion, and Subaru generally had way more than he believed. A loving family, talents, skills, looks, physique and intelligence. One girl even had a crush on him in the middle school, not that he had ever known that. In the new world, he too had people he was close to, women who loved him, skills that were quite useful in his endeavors, knowledge, and even his own unique power that no one else could possess.

But it was never enough for him. So, his delusion, rooted in a feeling of his own incompetence in contrast with his desire to be important, manifested itself into a blatant refusal of the idea of Fate, it became the power to shape the world as he wished. And so he stumbled from one bad end to another, eventually creating his own dream world, one piece at the time. "Return By Death." That was the nature of his Envy.

Now, Subaru was ultimately a good person at heart. Saintly even, as some would say. Thus his Envy was not centered on the destruction of others, but rather on the destruction of self.

The change in that idea was rather sudden. One might ask, what became the catalyst? Frustration? Anger? Desperation? The presence of his patron with him for way too long? Or just inebriation? Regardless, as the Sin Archbishop, representing Gluttony, Louis Arneb, was before him, he felt an incredible feeling of Envy. The second form of his Authority suddenly awoke.

-----

It was his, it should have been his. The hunger. They wasted it, indulged in it, hurt with it with zero purpose. He would do way more with it. He would change the world with it. He would not waste it. The Authorities, they should have always been his, it would've been way better if he'd had them from the start. HIS! HIS! HIS! HIS!

The two people despised by the world clashed with one another as both Authorities tried to take what the other user had.

So who had won?

Not the blond Archbishop.

Why?

Maybe it was due to the Sage's natural affinity. Or maybe it was because he already had two-thirds of Gluttony. Or maybe his Envy was simply way greater than hunger of Louis Arneb. Either way:

"MINE!"

A guttural roar escaped from the Sage's mouth.

The Gluttony's eyes suddenly grew dull, pale and unfocused, as the sensation of losing something inherit to her being hit her. Subaru, however, felt ecstatic, exhilarated, ALIVE. But far from satisfied. Both it and Return By Death remained within him, ready to be used again whenever he wished it.

The Gluttony was complete.

One might ask whether power like that corrupted his being or not. The answer to that question is, that it did not. Ultimately, Natsuki Subaru was still a good person. He even forbade himself to use it on anyone, but only the ones that were completely irredeemable in his eyes. Nonetheless, he toyed with a power that was fully capable of corrupting most people. In fact, if he had had it since his first day in Lugunica, he would certainly have been corrupted by it. He dubbed it "Jealous Desire".

-----

The pacified Sin Archbishop lay at his feet, utterly powerless. Not knowing what he should do right now, the Sage looked around.

"Huh, so that answers it. We must be in a sort of li-i-imbo, since Reid book was probably in use. Hey, you! Isn't tha-a-at right?"

No answer, just incoherent whimpering. After looking at the vanquished enemy Subaru started to feel a bit bad. Lack of treat? Parental instincts? Empathy? Regardless, the sight of the powerless, crying child tugged at his heartstrings.

"Hey. You said you wanted a ha-a-appy life? You went about it the wrong way. You can't have a pe-e-erfect life by sittin' in here and experiencin' what others have. Now, I don't know how bad you are compa-a-ared to your brothers, since you were stuck in here. Beako said that you just ran away when they defeated Lye and you two swapped, and that's it. Anyway, I have another idea. I don't kno-o-ow how, but I'll try to find the other way to get you out of here, and then you'll have a happy no-o-ormal life, not as Archbishop. Probably. If there is a way. I already ha-a-ave one loli that I promised a happy tomorrow, might as well have you as we-e-ell."

Was he insane for considering redemption for someone like that? Certainly. Still, channeling his loli-taming powers, the Sage patted the head of the crying Sin Archbishop, eventually calming her down.

"Uau…"

"Shit, did I give you brain damage? Or ma-a-aybe it's just a speech impediment? Sry, sti-i-ill new to this."

As the little girl hugged his left arm, the expanse of white began to fade.

"'lright, gotta go. I pro-o-omise I gonna get you out of here. Eve-e-entually..."

"Uau."

"Yeah, see you so-o-on. I might meet you here aga-a-ain. I know the way now."

-----

Subaru awoke to see the worried look on his liege's face.

"Subaru, are you alright?"

"Yep, Emilia-tan, I met a new loli and e-e-even acquired a new power-up!"

Yet again, the half-elf's face held a bewildered expression.

As her love finally awoke, Satella experienced a new sensation. She felt calmer, lighter, happier than usual. A burning obsession inside her chest had partially subsided all of a sudden.

"She grew weaker. Did he..?"

-----

An emergency meeting was held in the Royal Palace.

"Marcos, what's the point of waking us up during Earth-time? Couldn't you wait a few hours 'til sunrise?"

"It's an emergency. A dragon has been sighted in the Capital. It flew by the city. All guards are on high alert."

"Dragon?"

"Yes, an azure Dragon."

"Azure? Do you mean Volcanica?"

"I can only think of Divine Dragon when I heard of his description."

"Are you sure it's not just some drunken rumbling?"

"Multiple reports from the Merchant and Noble districts. Bystanders and patrolling guards. There was even a mention of it passing close to the Palace."

"Where was he coming from?"

"Roughly west."

"That's the direction of Priestella, isn't it? What was the Divine Dragon doing there?"

"That's why I assembled you. There were news of the Witch Cult attack on Priestella. A few survivors have just reached the capital."

"Weren't the Royal Candidates assembling there?"

"Yes."

"Assemble a relief force as soon as possible."

"Already on the move."

"Alright, so the Dragon coming from that direction means he was probably there to save the city, right? We still have the covenant."

"Presumably."

"Well, that means the city is probably safe now, since he's gone back."

"Yes, very likely."

"Phew, hopefully the Royal Candidates safe... except for that half-devil and that thug, they can burn for all I care."

Their discussion was interrupted, as a messenger entered the planning room.

"Renowned Elders, there are more news. The Dragon Tablet has a new prophecy."

"Be quick. What is it?"

"You must see it firsthand."

In a few minutes, the Council moved to another room to interpret the Dragon's new prophecy. One by one, the Elders' expressions grew more and more bewildered with each line of text on the Dragon Tablet.

"Hey, nerds, me and my bud Volc decided to halt this Royal Selection business till we fix some things in this piece of shit state. I'm gonna to make a utopia here, so the crew and I can have a chill life here. Be ready for some cool changes! The council guys, your days are numbered, you assholes! Time for a real star to enter the stage! Signed, Sage Natsuki "Flugel" Subaru."

A singular sentence was uttered by the Elders in unison:

"What the fuck?"

Chapter Text

"I knew you would be here."

"Don't you have a link with me? It should've been ra-a-ather easy for you to find me, Tella."

After returning from wherever the Reid's book had led him to, Subaru called for a break. He did not bother to explain what had happened after he had started to reading the last book either. Thankfully, no one pushed him to do so. While the others were busy preparing a brief midnight snack with the whatever hastily gathered supplies, the Sage took some time to explore the lower levels. Last time he'd stumbled upon Reality Slasher and his old clothes while blindly looking around the place, hence he decided to take a look around for a bit, just in case there was something more for him here. So far, he found two things: the first was the healing spirit who, for whatever reason, took a liking to him, and chose to follow the Sage around. The second was this place – the balcony of the tower.

"I knew you would stay here, even without it. You used to be here all the time. Especially during the nights."

"Ah, stargazin' no doubt."

"Yes, you said you eventually wanted to map out every star there is in here. But you had no time... Things took a turn for the worse..."

"M-m-m. Quite a depressin' view. What was the point of me buildin' this pla-a-ace in the desert?"

The half-elf beside him smiled. She had a fond memories of this view. Well, before it had become so desolate.

"It wasn't always like that. It used to be so pretty back then…"

"Ah, must've been the miasma influence, huh."

A white bird nested near the duo.

"Mhm. This place used to be a serene grassland. There was a forest right in there, a small settlement right over there, right before the barrier. Well, at least the flower fields survived, although they had a lot more kinds of flowers back then."

"And they weren't infested by a bunch of flower bears?"

When they were on the landing trajectory, Subaru noticed quite a few.

"Te-he! Of course not!"

This was the first time Subaru had seen Satella laugh, not just chuckle briefly, but genuinely laugh. At this very moment, he fully understood why his past self had been so taken with her, why those feelings still lingered somewhere deep inside his skull.

"There used to be an underground river around here that supplied water to this place. Between it drying up and the effects of Envy's presence… I'm sorry, I ruined yet another thing…"

A tear dipped on the Sage's shoulder. Turning towards the source of the moisture on his shoulder, Subaru pulled the half-elf closer, hoping that it would help. In truth, this place made him rather moody as well.

"The caves, where the river used to flow are still there, albeit they are infested by witchbeasts. One of the paths leads right into Merope."

"Ah, so the Seal isn't upstairs, but downstairs. Cle-e-ever."

Another bird found its place on the railing.

"It was made by Dona at your request, after you were gone. Merope used to be our favorite place before everything went wrong."

"Undergro-o-ound? Inside a cave?"

"Secret hiding spot. It was also a big magical research area."

"Sounds kinda biza-a-arre."

"Yeah, that's exactly what I told you back then. But I grew to like it, eventually."

"Does this Seal thin' actually do anythin'? I mean, we met in pe-e-erson like three times at this point. Well, the first one is kinda iffy, since it's Envy, but..."

"It does limit me a bit outside. But it was mostly designed to limit the miasma creeping out, first and foremost. Between it and the barriers, the outside world is mostly unaffected. It also stabilizes the Shadow Garden."

"Shadow Garden?"

"The edge of reality where I resided for four hundred years."

"Ah, I see-e-e…"

There were about a dozen birds all around the duo.

"She's weaker. You had done something, right?"

"Mhm, it's probably what I did back there when I read Reid's bo-o-ok. You probably saw what happened."

She nodded.

"I must've taken a pi-i-iece of your Envy inside myself back there. I wonder if takin' more bits like that can help free you."

"I'm not certain… It would still be wise to reclaim your Authorities beforehand."

"Yeah, of course. Usin' it against you probably won't work either, not that I would wa-a-ant for you to end up like Louis. The whole thin' just feels da-a-angerous. Like losin' control of it could cause a fuckin' apocalypse level of dangerous. At least now there's a way to deal with Capella and Sirius."

There were a lot of birds around them at this point. Black-eyed knight finally took notice.

"Cre-e-epy. Feels like they're right about to swarm you and… Fu-u-uck. Bad memories. At least you're here, just in case it's the Rabbit thin' again..."

"I'm sorry..."

"Nah, that one is de-e-efinitely on Dona and Roswaal. Bloody psychos. Oi! Shoo! Shoo! Get lost!"

After some time of running around, screaming, and waving his arms Subaru managed to scare the flock away.

"What were you doin' before I arrived?"

"Crying… I… it was my fault... all my fault..."

"Damn, you were the shu-u-ut in neet, too? He-he, I swear I am the neet magnet. 'lright, calm do-o-own, Tella-tan, things will turn for the better, I swe-e-ear it. I said I'll get e-e-everyone a proper happy endin', including you. I'm not backin' down on that. Besides, it was probably like eighty percent on the past-me, if not all one hundred. Doesn't matter now, anyway. Right now, the only thin' we can do is to fix what can be fixed."

Satella's expression softened. She adored his unwavering determination. It brought her peace. She hugged him back, hoping for a better future. A future where they could both could smile once again while looking at the endless expanse of shining stars.

"Just like we used to."

"Past-me was su-u-uch a dick. Leaving all of a sudden, forcing everyone wait for fo-o-our centuries, making a such a go-o-orgeous girl bawl her eyes out. Seriously, makes me want to beat him up."

After calming his companion, he finally turned away from the expanse of sand.

"Sigh, let's go back and have a snack, Rem and Julius are pro-o-obably done with cookin'."

-----

In a room that had been haphazardly fashioned for a kitchen and dining room, others from the Sage's "crew" were preparing a midnight dinner. Well, only Rem and Julius were, the others mostly kept company.

"Oh, you're back, Subaru. Have you find anything else interesting?"

"Well, this spirit keeps followin' me around now, and I also found the door to the balcony, but tha-a-at's about it. No more super swords."

The discussion he had with Tella wasn't mentioned.

"Wait, how did you manage to… Ah, never mind, why am I even asking questions at this point?"

"Is that a healing spirit from that room?"

Emilia was rather surprised that the spirit she had seen during Shaula's tour of the Tower was now with him.

"Yep, looks like it. Master got one of his old spirit buddies back with him now. He had plenty like this one back in the day."

"Betty can accomplish much more for her contractor than such a simple spirit can with all its efforts, humph!"

Understandably, the blonde girl was rather jealous.

"Hey, Beako, I'm not cheatin' on you, don't wo-o-orry. You're my favorite spirit, and this little green guy just decided to follow alo-o-ong. My Beako is the cu-u-utest one, I won't trade you for anyone."

As he said this, he lifted up his companion and began to spin her around in a fashion that was familiar to just about everyone in the room at this point.

"Ah! Stop it! Put me down, I suppose! It's really embarrassing!"

"I'm just showin' people how much I ca-a-are for you, Beako. What's so embarrassin' in that?"

After some time the Great Spirit of Yin was put back down again. However, that did not mean that he stopped hugging her.

"So, what are you makin'?"

"It's nothing much, we are just warming up the rations."

Of course, it wasn't a proper meal. Only basic rations were brought – salted meat, water, bread, some tea, and a bunch of non-perishable vegetables. It would last for about a week, so it was fine for a brief four to six hour trip that they had planned.

"Glad that Rem's cookin' is back. I'd rather shoot myself than try to survive on Ram's steamed tatoes again. And that tea, urgh! That tea is a fuckin' wa-a-ar crime!"

Rem, who was preparing vegetables, smiled.

"Nee-sama's is amazing all around, but her cooking does leaves something to be desired. Rem is all too happy to assist her in that department. Although Frederica and Petra should've been an ample replacement when I was gone."

"Hah, they are both good, but not as good as you. Ho-o-onestly, you were so damn effective at maid duties that when you were go-o-one, the entirety of mansion nearly collapsed without your presence. Pretty sure Frederica even bein' there was a consequence of your absence. She e-e-even had to hire Petra to help her out. Besides, e-e-even after becomin' a full-fledged knight, I still feel kinda forced to help out with some chores from time to time."

The maid beamed at his praise.

"Betty's been generous enough to assist occasionally too, in fact."

"Mhm, so have I."

"Wait, ya did chores in in yo spare time?"

"Mhm, what's wrong with that? Subaru always helps out, so it would be re-e-eally unfair if I did not help too."

"Really strange thing to do for da Great Spirit, da knight, and da Royal Candidate. Why do ya even lack servants? I thought yo Margrave has more money than one could spend. Weirdos."

"I see this diligence as something admirable, Anastasia-sama, foolish a bit maybe, but admirable still. If you see a need for any duties other than those implied by the title of the knight, you need only to ask, Anastasia-sama."

"Oi, get a ro-o-om, you two. There's plenty in here."

"That's… not what I meant, Subaru."

"Sh-h-h, I'm wing-mannin' for you, bud. Don't you want to ba-a-ag that lass?"

Subaru whispered that to Julius not so quietly, embarrassing him in the process.

"Em-m-m… no…"

"Haha, that was funny, Natsuki-kun. Seriously tho, Julius, if ya do, just ask."

"Now you two a-a-actually need a room."

"Funny words comin' from mister 'I got too many people fawnin' over me' over here."

It was Subaru's (and four more other girls') turn to be embarrassed.

"'alf of Lugunica would like to have da Lolimancer for themselves at this point. Male and female alike. Don't ya envy him a bit, Julius?"

"If it comes to the things this fame gets him, not really. This feels more burdensome, having so much responsibility and so much… attention. I'm still not sure what exactly will happen now that he reclaimed his title."

"It will be fi-i-ine! Everything will stay the same."

"No, it won't, Subaru. You have to take this more seriously."

"Aren't yo-o-ou a stuck-up type. When you fi-i-inally kick the bucket I'll write: 'Ju-u-ulius, the gre-e-eatest jerk. Till the very end.' on your tombstone."

"Given your eccentricities and your reckless nature, I think you would meet your end sooner than I do, Subaru."

"Haha, NO."

The "no" had such a potent impact that it immediately halted the flow of conversation. This answer made the heads turn. It was way too serious, as if Subaru actually believed that he would outlive everyone in this room, like he'd be the least likely to meet his end in a violent fashion. That these were the thoughts of the sober Subaru and not some drunken ramblings. Most grew rather worried for him.

"Sounds like something that Master would say."

"Urgh, Subaru's foolishness is so bothersome, in fact."

"Yes, Subaru, you re-e-ealy should not risk your life so much. You always make me worry."

"Subaru-kun, I appreciate your fearlessness, but you really do lack restraint."

"I just wish that you would not have to pay so much for it, love."

Only she understood that the Sage was absolutely correct. They will never get to see him fail. Only the two of them will remember. Only the two of them will have to carry this burden.

-----

The midnight snack-time passed uneventfully. The crew discussed what to do next after Sage finishes the task of clearing the tower. Anastasia was interested in implementing the fancy construction technology that the Pleiades Watchtower was build with. Under Subaru's endorsement, she decided to invest in concrete production and prepare more notes for her contacts to start manufacturing steel beams. She also made plans to organize the logistics of extracting mana crystals. Meanwhile, Subaru made plans that involved search and obliteration of the last active Sin Archbishop – Capella Emerada Lugunica.

"A-a-anyway, let's go meet Reid again. I kinda wanna see what's the next trial is all abo-o-out."

-----

"Oi, Re-e-eid, where the fuck are you! He-e-ey!"

"Ah, fuck, Flugel! Stop screamin', I'm here."

"Took you lo-o-ong enough."

"I said I'll have a nap. The fuck are ya screamin' for? Ya're free to go to Volc if ya want."

"Nah, I wanna make it fa-a-air and squa-a-are. Like past-me intended."

"Oi, that means trials? 'lright, everyone who wants to make it through has to kick my ass first."

"Everyone who wants to? Can't we just beat ya all at once?"

Anastasia knew that she had no chance to defeat the Sword Saint alone. So would many others.

"Nope, if ya can't beat me one-on-one, ya can't go any further."

"That…"

"...would be a rather difficult challenge. Are you sure you want to handle it this way, Subaru?"

"What's wrong, pu-u-ussy? Can't one-vs-one my bud, huh, Julius?"

"I mean, you would have to win against him too, wouldn't you?"

"Na-a-ah, I've won already."

Everyone around him looked at him in bewilderment.

"Huh, when?"

"When I beat your ass in the 'who can ha-a-andle the most whiskey without fallin' to the ground' ga-a-ame. Back at Priestella."

"Oh, right, fuck, I forgot. Got me there, ya smart ass. Alright, Flugel, ya can go."

"Wait, that worked? How?"

Julius was beyond flabbergasted that the drinking game that got the first Sword Saint stuck on the chandelier allowed Sage to make through the trial for free.

"Ehm, can't we, like ya friend there, try to beat ya at somethin' else? I got cards on me, we can try blackjack if ya want."

Anastasia had a plan. Aside from being a successful businesswoman, she was also known as the best card player in Kararagi.

"Nah, Flugel caught me with my pants down, so he gets a pass, but ya have to try harder. Only straight-up fight."

"Urgh, how da fuck are we goin' to get past him now?!"

"Tella, you can probably pass without an issue, ri-i-ight?"

"Yes."

Without any warning, a thousand arms sprouted from her, aiming for Reid. The clash of two living legends had begun.

The fight was close, very close. The room shook with each clash of Reid's chopsticks against the half-elf's shadow arms. It was clear, that neither of the two was holding back, and others even had to pull back to avoid collateral damage. But after a five tense minutes, the fight was over.

"Nice. You go-o-o, Tella-tan! Take tha-a-at, Reid!"

Returning to the one who had cheered her up throughout the fight, a somewhat weary Satella took place near her beloved.

"'lright, Tella, ya can go through. Fu-u-uck, I wish this body didn't suck as much. I'm gettin' tired already."

"The rest of you can stay on the lo-o-ower levels and chill while Tella and I are gonna chat with Volc. Unless you really want to spar with Reid. Oh, and Reid, if I he-e-ear a word about you harassin' a-a-any of my girls, you're gonna have some issues."

"Yeah, I know, Flugel. I'm not da one to step on other's turf. So, which one of ya wimps wants to try me?"

"Reid-sama, if I may…"

As he said that, Julius drew his sword and allowed his ladies to empower him for the upcoming fight.

"Ia, Kua, Aro, Iku, In, Nes. Assist me!"

"Oh, a fancy boy, huh. 'lright, brin' it!"

Reid responded in kind by drawing his chopsticks.

-----

"Sup, Volc. We made it past Reid. How are you doin'?"

The azure dragon opened his eyes and:

"Thou, who hath reached the top of the tower. Step forth through the first floor, almighty petitioner."

"Oi, Volc? Ah, fu-u-uck, he's asleep again. Tella, was he a-a-always like that?"

She chuckled.

"Yes. He was always rather dreamy and recluse."

"Thou, who hath reached the top of the tower. Step forth through the first floor, almighty petitioner."

"Vo-o-olc. Wakey-wakey!"

"I, am Volcanica. In accordance with the ancient covenant, the will of thee who hath reached the top shall be questioned."

"Oh, a new vo-o-oice line! Wait, I think I heard that one."

"There's a special scale underneath his chin, touching it will usually snap him out of it. Or make him go berserk, fifty-fifty."

"Well, let's try tha-a-at, then. Go-go, Reality Slasher!"

Using his blade, Subaru quickly closed the distance and made a simple palm strike right into the white scale.

"Wah! Oh, friend Flugel. Thou frightened me a bit. I wast merely contemplating about the new opportunities, now that thou hath returned to us."

"M-m-m, I kinda decided to do the whole trial thin' fair. I dunno what past me had planned with tho-o-ose, but I wanted to try."

"I seeth. Then thee must be past the grueling bout with friend Reid."

"No, a-a-actually. Well, Tella-tan is, but I just caught him off guard. I've already beaten him in a drinkin' competition a-a-all the way back in Priestella, so that got me a pass."

"Ah. Ever resourceful, friend Flugel. Thou wisdom verily knows no bounds."

"Heh, feels like I cheated. But since it worked, it's fine. Me and Reid are chill with one another. A-a-anyway, what's the final trial?"

"Thy final trial is the test of valour. Thou must traverse pillars and reacheth the top while myself shall try to cease thee."

"Hm, that's dangerous… But ma-a-anageable."

Subaru had great parkour skills, courtesy of Clind's training. With his Guiltywhip, he could scale the pillars with no trouble. Volcanica's interference was a bit troubling, but all he had to do was to move horizontally along the column to block his line of sight. Also, it would be a great idea not to get the whip damaged, otherwise he would plummet to his doom. Suddenly, he had another idea.

"Wa-a-ait, can't I just do… this?"

The last word came from the top of the column. As it turned out, he could simply teleport to the top with Reality Slasher, thus completely cheesing the challenge.

"Tha-a-at really feels like cheatin'. This thing is o-o-op!"

"Hahaha, creative as always, friend. Thou found thy favorite weapon already!"

It turned out that Divine Dragon did not mind.

"O-o-oh, so the-e-ese handprints were probably designed for us, huh. The old crew. Thi-i-is looks like mine, tha-a-at's for Tella-tan, thi-i-is one is either Dona's or Shaula's, and the rest are Reid, Farsale, and Hoshin."

"Mhm, a sign of a long forgotten past."

Satella appeared right beside him.

"We madeth such wonderful memories long ago, friend Flugel."

Volcanica also hovered beside the Sage and his half-elf companion.

"We-e-ell… let's make a couple more."

With that, Subaru touched his handprint.

The Great Library Pleiades was reclaimed by its rightful owner.

-----

It was clear that the first Sword Saint was merely playing around. With his spirits, Julius was strong enough to keep up, but only barely. Despite his apparent exhaustion after the duel with Satella, he was still way too strong for the Finest to confidently beat. So the knight chose to remain on the defensive.

"Oi, if ya keep tryin' to intercept every strike I make, ya're goin' to eventually start missin' a few."

"No offense, Reid-sama, but your technique is rather outdated. For about three centuries."

It was, in fact, out of date. Not that this really helped Julius that much.

"Hah, the fuck's a technique? Somethin' yo kind made to look cool in front of yo chicks? Me I'm just a Stick Swinger. If I really need to kick someone's ass, I don't need no fancy swordwork. Ya've seen me scuffle with Tella."

"You lost to her, however."

"Implyin' ya would not. Phah, if Envy was here, ya wouldn't have lasted a strike! Not like there are people who can stop her, besides that madman Flugel. Ya know how we've sealed Tella? He got right into Envy's face and hugged her. Fuckin' insane guy, I swear, huggin' a walkin' apocalypse! Who does that!?"

"Sounds exactly like him. Do you know how he killed the White Whale?"

"Huh? How?"

"I did not see it with my own eyes, but he launched himself with a shard of ice and leaped onto its horn. Then he jumped off, causing it to plummet to the ground behind him. Then he dropped the Great Tree to immobilize it for the killing blow."

"Fuck, that's sounds cool as fuck!"

"Oi, are ya two fightin' or havin' a contest for who can praise Natsuki-kun da most. Ya know he won't marry either of ya."

"'ey, Short-stack, he won't marry ya either."

"Anastasia-sama, we are merely getting to know one another through the skill with our… weapons."

"Aye, that we are."

-----

Suddenly, the ground beneath them shook.

"Did you feel that?"

"Must've been an earthquake, I suppose."

"I don't think so, Beatrice-sama."

"No, Ankle-Biter, someone breached the perimeter. I smell someone weird."

"Wait, smell? What are ya talkin' about?"

"Yes, Rem senses something odd from the lower levels as well. That's not Subaru or the Wi- Satella."

"Hm-m-m, now that you say that, I do feel something too, in fact."

"Reid-sama, if I may, could we halt our bout for now? This situation might be dangerous."

"Ah, 'lright. For now. Ya can all check it out. I'll stay here, tho."

-----

"So, Volc, don't you, like, make pro-o-ophecies? I heard that there's like a special tablet from which the ro-o-oyals get prophecies from you."

"Aye, the Dragon Tablet. 'Tis a part of the task you put for me. To keep the Farsale's domain safe from external conflicts and to deliver thy wisdom to these folk from time to time."

"Wait, my-y-y wisdom? So, the prophecies are my own doin'..."

"Aye."

"Fu-u-uck."

There was another point to the second theory (the one that meant that all that happened wasn't a coincidence, but the master-plan of the past Subaru).

"Urgh, so-o-o much to unfuck. Well, not like I can read mind of my past self. Wait..."

He probably could. He just has to find a book called "Flugel".

"Sigh, that's for another da-a-ay. Let's start fixin' this mess first. A-a-anyway, you probably have a way to write on it remotely. Ri-i-ight?"

"Aye, yond is but a simple charm for the likes of mineself."

"Can I write somethin' on it? I have a cool idea…"

He grinned mischievously.

"Ha-ha-ha, thou wishes to prank the readers!"

"Yup, it's gonna be si-i-ick. 'lright, here's what I wanna write…"

"Hey, nerds,..."

After some time:

"...Natsuki 'Flugel' Subaru."

"Ha, I can't wa-a-ait to see their faces! Wait, what was that?"

"Something's happening downstairs."

"I have a bad feelin'. I think it's somethin' serious."

"Friend Flugel, does thou wishes for mine assistance?"

"Yep, Volc. Check the situation from the outside and secure the perimeter. Tella and I are goin' down."

"Aye."

"Let's go, Tella-tan."

"With you, love."

-----

"Wait, look. See that?"

Emilia pointed to the newly formed hole in one of Alcyone's walls. As for the one that formed said hole:

"Hello, there, meatbags. Did you miss this beautiful lady?"

"Ah, shit, that's bad. Anyone's down to run and call Natsuki-kun to deal with this?"

"I believe we have to stand our ground, Anastasia-sama. Besides, the First Sword Saint won't let us pass regardless."

"Who is that? She smells… revolting."

"Someone re-e-eally bad, Rem."

"Yes, be ready, maid. As for you, Cultist, Betty will show you her power."

All six readied themselves for the fight.

"Ah, I see most of you know who I am. As for the other meatbags: I am the Sin Archbishop of the Witch Cult, representing Lust, Capella Emerada Lugunica."

Chapter Text

Skipping steps, and using a combination of Yin magic, Guiltywhip, and Reality Slasher portal technique, the Sage and his lover descended to Electra rather quickly.

"Oi, Re-e-eid, the fuck are you doin', get up!"

"Ha? Oh, for fuck's sake, Flugel, let me sleep."

"Where are the others? I tho-o-ought it was you makin' the ruckus."

"Nah, it's someone down below. Others went down to check for da source of da noise."

"And you? Why the hell are you sti-i-ill here?"

"I dunno. I'm just kinda tired."

"Ah, cmon! Get u-u-up, you lazy ass!"

Pulling him by the ear, the Sage finally managed to lift the Sword Saint off the floor.

"This is serious de-e-eal, Reid! It was loud enough to be heard from Maia! I need your stre-e-ength and your swor-… wait, ri-i-ight. Actually, why the fuck cho-o-opsticks… ah, never mind, you'll remind me this latter. Let's go!"

-----

Meanwhile, down below.

"That was annoying, you Witch wannabe! Where's your knight? Is his leg fine? I played way too rough with him last time."

"Subaru is fine, and he will be back soon to kick your bottom! Your nasty cursed blood did not work on him! Hya!"

Another large icicle was jammed into the Black Dragon's throat. Unfortunately, that too had little effect.

"Careful, Emilia-sama. Make sure no blood spills on you. Take this, you cultist!"

Rem followed through with her morning star, giving the Royal Candidate time to pull back.

"I'm fine, Rem. We just have to hold out until Subaru returns. He will know what to do."

"So freezin' her doesn't work either. Alright, Julius, ya're next."

Anastasia took charge of this confrontation as an impromptu strategist. Emilia and Julius were up close, where they would be most effective, while Shaula, Beatrice, and Rem stayed at a distance, providing cover fire.

"As you say. Al Clauzeria!"

The rainbow-colored vortex shot from the purple-haired knight's blade and engulfed the accursed Archbishop. The impact was clearly devastating, as the left half of the Black Dragon was utterly obliterated by this attack. However:

"Ah, that tickled."

The ever-regenerating Capella shrugged off even that assault without any issue.

"Purple-head, clear the line of sight! Hell Snipe: Barrage Variation!"

The one addressed quickly disengaged, having failed in his attempt to kill the Archbishop, right before thirty-six shining needles struck the Dragon. Predictably, this attack failed to do any permanent damage as well.

"Urgh, it's like beating jello!"

"Fair assessment, Shaula-sama. That was nonetheless a splendid attack."

"Master taught me that. But it's nothing compared to what Echidna-san or Tella-san can do. You'd be breathless after seeing Al Shario or S.M.B. up close."

"Betty feels that Subaru is somewhere on Electra, in fact. Hang on! El Minya!"

The former librarian's attack connected as well, forming a dozen crystals all along the black scales, but the Dragon regenerated faster than the crystallization could spread.

Occasionally, Capella would counterattack, but her skills were no match for the people in this room, as her assault was easily countered by the efforts of Emilia, Rem, and Julius. The demi-beasts that swarmed through the opening were also a problem that, while not strong, still required some attention.

-----

It was at this moment that assistance finally arrived. From the place where Capella had originally breached the perimeter, another Dragon had emerged.

"Does thou require mine assistance? Fear not, friends, for myself shall provide thee with all mine power!"

From the mouth of said Dragon, a white flame emerged and engulfed the Black pretender. This had some effect. The Capella's form, engulfed in flame, began to dissolve into the black flaming sludge. However, after the part of said sludge that wasn't on fire separated from the part that was, it reformed back into the form of the Sin Archbishop (albeit human form, not the Dragon form).

"Urgh, the bloody Gospel didn't warn me that I'd have to fight half of Lugunica in here! Let alone that senile lizard!"

"Oh, you have no-o-o idea, you dumb bitch."

"Subaru!"

And that was the point when the battle turned in their favor.

-----

"Oi, Reid. Clear the trash mobs first."

"Eh, sure."

Within half of a minute, with the help of Volcanica, Reid managed to clear the swarms of the demi-beasts.

"'lright, Plan D first."

In an instant, the blonde cultist quite literally exploded from within, turning into a water balloon of boiling blood, bone marrow, and viscera. The reason for it was the Dragon Sword in Sage's hands.

"That was easy. Why da fuck did ya even call me, Flugel?!"

"Nah, lo-o-ok. She's reformin'."

"Fuck, that's ridiculous! Ya just turned her into a puddle!"

"Yeah, the Authorities are fuckin' bro-o-oken, I know. Plan Y."

The Yang Sword set the ever-reforming sludge that was Capella Emerada Lugunica permanently aflame. While it slowed down her regeneration somewhat, it did not stop her.

"Hm-m-m, Plan Y is a bust, what 'bout Plan R?"

The mass, that was nearly done reforming back into the form of the Archbishop of Lust, was suddenly split apart by the portal, which then violently closed a second later, leaving only a half-formed head remaining.

"What's with the names?"

"That's o-o-obvious, Julius. D is for Dragon Sword, Y is for Yang Sword, R is for…"

"Reid? Reinhard?"

"Reality Slasher. The o-o-other two are RA1 and RA2, respectively."

Julius sighed. He still had not made peace with Subaru's naming patterns.

"Or R can a-a-also mean Rabbit. That's where I sent that other part. You know, I ki-i-inda joked about weaponizin' the Rabbit Dimension, bu-u-ut…"

"It did not work either, I suppose. Pay attention, Subaru. Next one."

"There aren't many plans I can come up with on the fly-y-y… Well, there's a plan S… But I don't like Plan S. Ah fuck it, nuclear option! 'lright, Tella, your move, I'll brin' her outside."

Satella nodded vigorously, clearly excited to show others her ability to protect her boyfriend. Subaru, in a meantime, opened another portal that led him and a still regenerating mass of flesh outside.

"E-e-everyone, come through, now! I can't let that skank's innards dirty my crib."

His companions followed the Sage without question.

"Julius, Emilia, Volc, Beako, get us covered as best you can! Tella-tan is about to raise he-e-ell!"

One after another, the domes of various colors emerged all around the group.

"The stage is set, Tella-tan, now!"

Before Subaru could be caught in an epicenter, he slammed a bottle of Silver Beauty into Capella's mouth, briefly paralyzing her, then quickly escaped into the area protected by the barrier through the hastily made tear in space.

"Cor Leonis."

Using his Authority, he connected her patron to the mana pools of all his friends for the maximum effectiveness. Not that it was necessary.

-----

In an instant, the air all around the Augria Sand Dunes suddenly grew stale. The familiar paralysis suddenly engulfed Sage's companions once again. Only three others: the Sage himself, the Divine Dragon, and the First Sword Saint remained collected, albeit tense. The shadows engulfed the woman in the black dress as she formed the matrix of the spell. Her eyes began to glow bright purple. The air became so supercharged with mana that the half-elf's hair began to float in the air as if during a storm. Her expression grew cold and hateful as she reminded herself the pain that the target of her onslaught had inflicted on her beloved during the assault on Priestella. Her Envy violently trashed within her mind, vigorously approving of what she was about to do.

"S.M.B."

And then it happened.

What did S.M.B. stand for? Satella-tan Maji Bomb. Originally, this phrase wasn't intended to be used literally, of course. Just a habitual way of praising the appeal of his beloved. But when they finally finished making that spell, the name came up all on its own.

The basic principal behind the spell wasn't all too difficult. Her love taught her to imagine that everything around her was made up of very, very, very small pieces – atoms, that's how he called them. They were so small and so many that it was impossible to count them in a lifetime, even inside a tiny speck of dust. So what did Satella had to do? Simply split an even tinier piece. But that alone wasn't enough to make the big boom – to make it actually devastating, Satella's lover asked her to imagine an atom so heavy and so complex that it could not to hold together all on its own. She had to use Yin magic to create a piece of metal composed of these atoms and then do the splitting. The tiny split pieces would then bump into intact atoms, which would also split, causing others to split, and split again, and again. The cascade. When she finally worked it out, the result horrified Satella. Not even Echidna could surpass this one. Only he and Satella were able to visualize and cast S.M.B.. The Sage could not cast it via his own gate, due to mana shortage, he had to use a ginormous mana stone like the one buried under the Tower, while Satella could do it on her own at the expense of a truly ginormous amount of mana. Her beloved told her that such a weapon had been used to completely destroy two cities in his homeland. More so, he told her that it was possible to cause an even greater destruction. So, she promised to him never to use S.M.B. unless absolutely necessary. When she went… rogue… she broke that promise and destroyed half of the world because of it.

Needless to say, when he asked what big spell Satella could do, S.M.B. came to mind. She did not even have to describe the half of it before getting a permission to use it in critical situations.

It was akin to a natural disaster. No, even that comparison would be insufficient. For a brief second, the sky went completely dark. The brightest stars and even the light of the setting full moon went out like a burnt-out lightbulbs, leaving only the various barriers the crew had set up as the only source of light in the desert. Then the shadows surrounding Satella shot out from her in the direction of the Sin Archbishop. As they connected on target, the actual damaging part of the incantation took place – the wave of complete darkness in the form of a purplish half-globe surrounded the place where the Sin Archbishop just used to be. And then, with a loud boom and a simultaneous quake, it began to expand at a rapid pace, soon engulfing the Sage and his companions.

-----

Back at the capital of Lugunica:

"Ah! What was that!"

"I don't know. Must have been an earthquake."

"Urgh, another problem for our behinds. What's with tonight? Marcos, make sure the victims of this quake are attended to."

-----

At the Crystal Palace of Lupugana:

"Woah! What was that? Do you know, Stargazer?"

The Seventy-Seventh Emperor of the Vollachian Empire flinched from the surprise.

"I have no clue, your Ma-a-ajesty. 'Tis must be something unforeseen even by the Stars abo-o-ove."

-----

"Oh, fuck!"

"Language, Garf!"

"I mean, that was just so sudden, sis. Sorry for the swearin'"

"What do you think that was?"

"Captain's doin', no doubt, Brotto. Only Captain can pull off somethin' like that."

"I'd say that it could be the work of Subaru-kun's gi-i-irlfriend. The one we all happen to fe-e-ear."

-----

Eventually, the darkness dissipated.

Emilia's outer ice barrier cracked and shattered immediately. Julius's barrier soon followed, despite the frankly spectacular work of his spirits. Volcanica's barrier took the brunt of the assault and held the longest, but it too had faded. Beatrice's inner barrier held, but just barely. In truth, it wasn't Satella's full power, she just measured it just enough for the barriers to hold. Still, the impact was immense. It was certainly enough to create a ginormous crater all around them. Small purple specks of sand that were left after the impact and danced all around them gradually began to disappear. It was very beautiful in a morbid kind of way. Subaru estimated it to be akin to the impact of a nuclear or maybe even a thermonuclear warhead, though there seemed to be no lasting radiation. Thankfully, it was far away from any sign of civilization. The Sage's tower had held up remarkably well, a testament to its truly spectacular construction – it was almost fully intact. The Seal was untouched as well, but only because Subaru had brought them away from its location.

"Hoshin's balls…"

"By the Dragon..."

"That was re-e-ealy…"

"...devastating, in fact."

Emilia was perturbed by the sheer extent of destruction her counterpart could cause in the worst case scenario. Meanwhile, Beatrice was somewhere in between bafflement, jealousy, and admiration. This was way beyond even the Great Spirit of Yin's level of expertise. Anastasia and Julius just gawked. So did Rem, who just had zero words to say. Simply enough, she clearly understood now why she shouldn't have tried to attack Satella back in Priestella. That the painful bonk had actually been a mercy.

"Now that is the REAL magic. The Master's greatest work."

Even though Shaula could never do something like that, she was proud, too. She wasn't the only one:

"Alright, that was ma-a-agnificent, Tella-tan. 10/10 in the explosion department – Crimson Demon loli would've been ve-e-ery proud of you. Now we just need to work on the pro-o-oper chant…"

"'ey, Flugel! She's alive."

At the bottom of the crater, the few remaining drops of what had once been Capella Emerada Lugunica began to reform once again.

"Ah, for fuck's sake! What, do I have to destroy you on a subatomic le-e-evel?! Just di-i-ie already, you dumb bitch!"

"Em-m-m, any other ideas, Natsuki-kun?"

"Urgh, fuck it! Pla-a-an A! I'm tired of playin' around! Everyone, stay behind me."

"Good luck, love."

"Yeah, I'm gonna fuckin' erase that bitch."

And then Subaru disappeared into a freshly made tear in space that led him straight to the epicenter. Others followed.

-----

"That hurt, you meatbag! That hurt, that hurt, THAT HURT!"

"Yeah, go figure. You li-i-iterally tanked a nuke. Wanna drink?"

The Sage pulled another bottle of Silver Beauty from his belt (he brought three: the first was emptied at the top of the tower, while the second disappeared in the explosion). He pop-opened the bottle and reached out. Unfortunately for the Sin Archbishop, his clumsy movements caused him to spill the drink right in her face.

"A-A-A-A-A-A-A-AH!"

The skin that made contact with the drink suddenly began to boil.

"Wait, se-e-eriously?! Whiskey is your counter?! That's so fuckin' dumb. I tho-o-ought you were talkin' about Tella-tan blowin' you up into smithereens."

"A-A-A-A-A-A-A-AH! You pathetic little slab of meat! How dare!.."

"Nah. Shut it. Ski-i-ip dialogue. I don't need any more of your dumb monologues. Eh, well, usin' a keg of whiskey on you is kinda wasteful, so let's do thi-i-is instead. Plan A."

"What? What are you doing?! Let go!"

Subaru grabbed her arm with his palm whilst simultaneously raising his pinky. Despite Capella's desperate efforts, she could not break such a simple looking hold for whatever reason, surprising everyone around the Sage.

"You don't know that hold? So uncu-u-ultured. The gre-e-eatest Kung Fu master taught me that one. Hm-m-m, I wonder if there are a couple panda-like demi-humans in here… Anyway, what I meant to say is: "Goodby-y-ye, Capella Emerada Lugunica, and tha-a-ank you for the meal." Star Eating, phase one. Skado-o-osh!"

With that, he lowered his pinky. The two Authority users disappeared into the white light.

-----

"Da fuck was that? What does da Plan A stand for?"

"Authority, I suppose…"

"Where did Subaru-kun disappear to?"

"I have no clue. I no longer sense him anywhere. But my contract is still intact, in fact."

"Urgh, fuckin' Flugel and his shenanigans."

"Well, if that doesn't work, at least we can dunk her into a whiskey vat. I guess Natsuki-kun will call that one "Plan W"."

-----

Gluttony.

It was a strange Sin for Subaru. He wasn't really a person who would stuff his cheeks with something all day long. He liked to eat, but he wasn't particularly Gluttonous. Alright, maybe he liked mayo and whiskey a bit too much. Ma-a-aybe. That being said, for him, it wasn't about the food itself, he always associated the dinner with his friends and family instead, for him, the greatest meal in the world would not be complete without companionship. Both back at home and in this world too. Communion. That was his Gluttony.

At the moment of activating his Authority, he wanted to do two things: destroy Capella and find a way for Louis to be free – invite another person into this Communion of his. But he couldn't just spontaneously create a body for the former Gluttony. It was a balance of sorts – a new family member for the nasty cultist he wanted to beat (murder) the hell out of. So Gluttony responded in kind by forcibly separating the soul of Capella Emerada Lugunica from her body.

That's how his Gluttony manifested itself. An ability to create and destroy the primary idea behind life – the union of body and soul.

-----

"A-a-and we're here. Hey, Louis, I'm ba-a-ack."

"Uau!"

"Where did you bring me, meatbag?"

"Em-m-m, Heaven? Hell? Limbo? Afterlife? I dunno, I'm not religious."

"Let go!"

"Oh, right. Your Lust first. Tha-a-at was a bit stupid of me. NOW GIVE IT TO ME!"

The feeling of Envy that was familiar to the Sage at this point returned. This time it felt easier. Maybe the alcohol really was that effective in breaking both the body and the will of the Sin Archbishop.

To him, Capella Emerada Lugunica was the most repulsive being in existence. In his opinion, she was disgusting no matter what form she took. She was akin to taking a solid bunch of cooking ingredients and then slamming them all together to create a disgusting, inedible mash. Just like any other Archbishop, she was wasting her seemingly endless powers on a bunch of disgusting pettiness that stroked her enormous ego. It was absolutely atrocious. What he was about to do to her was just a karmic punishment. She deserved it.

And then it was done. The woman before him was no longer the blonde little shape-shifting brat, but rather an old-looking hag.

"What have you done to me? You made me ugly!"

"Ah, so tha-a-at's what it does. It basically makes you the opposite of what you we-e-ere... I guess, Louis strugglin' to speak also makes sense. Somewhat. A-a-anyway, bye-bye, Capella. I'm takin' Louis with me and leavin' you out here."

"What?!"

"Yeah, I'm leavin' you here for a decade or two to see if you are at least so-o-omewhat redeemable. I might get you a new body if you'd be on your best behavior. But, I'll take your old one for my ne-e-ew daughter. Star Eating, phase two."

With that, the Sage and his new loli left the white void, leaving Capella to contemplate her hubris.

-----

Suddenly, in a similar flash of light, the Sage returned. However, instead of happy expressions, some of the Sage's companions looked worried, if not outright hostile – Emilia, Beatrice, Julius and Anastasia, to be exact. A different blonde girl with a very long hair and a white dress held Subaru's hand.

"Is that the third Gluttony, in fact?"

Chapter Text

"Is that the third Gluttony, in fact?"

"Used to be. She's ha-a-armless now tho. Now Louis will be a part of the crew. Actually, since it's new you, we'll give you a new na-a-ame. How 'bout... Spica?"

"Uau!"

The girl that was formerly known as Louis, now as Spica, jumped up in excitement and nodded vigorously at his words. Feeling the need to celebrate his daughter's new name, Subaru rewarded the blonde girl with a dose of head-pats. These were very effective at taming her, as the previously frightening face of the Sin Archbishop of Gluttony, Louis Arneb, no longer looked frightening at all. For those who were still skeptical, this would've looked adorable, sure, but only if you ignored the fact that the blonde girl in question wasn't the Sin Archbishop who had wreaked havoc just a few days ago.

"M-m-m, yep, Master has the full Gluttony on him. Ankle-Biter Number Four is perfectly harmless."

"Em, Shaula-sama? What do you mean?"

"Master's scent is very noticeable. Even stronger than Tella-san's too."

"Yes, Subaru-kun is so pungent that it makes my legs shaky."

"Are ya sure it's not da whiskey fumes again, maid? I only have one flask of sobriety remedy left."

"No, Rem is fine. Do not worry, Anastasia-sama."

"Urgh, Betty's Subaru does indeed smell rather heavily of miasma, I suppose. How this one is able to distinguish between the smell of Sins, however, does puzzle Betty."

"Oh, I was kinda designed with that feature in mind. I'm far superior to both Blue Maid and Ankle-Biter Number One."

Both addressed people stared indignantly at the Sage's apprentice.

"Em, what exactly did you do back then, Subaru? That was re-e-ealy weird."

"Yeah, what's with da weird hold, 'ey, Flugel?"

"That was o-o-obviously the Wuxi Finger. Se-e-eriously, no one knows that one?.. C'mon, that's like the co-o-olest move ever!"

"I do, love."

Satella found it rather humorous. She was certain that Gluttony did not require for him to do that, but the move certainly fit her lover's cool, over-the-top style.

"Well, for you, Tella-tan, it makes sense. Since you were a-a-always near. But not even Sha-a-aula, really? I thought you knew mo-o-ost of the references."

"Nope."

"Huh, past-me was so la-a-ame. How the hell could I forget to tell you the plot of the co-o-olest movie of the XXI century? Do you at least know how to Jojo-pose?"

Shaula immediately struck a pose.

"Oh, that's the one Jotaro made against Di-i-io! Phew, at least you got so-o-ome of the references."

"Do not fret, dear friend. The mind of this one is too short to remember everything thou disclosed to her."

"Hey, that's mean, you Cynic! Especially coming from the one who sleeps through all the cool stuff Master gets into!"

"Eh, well… whate-e-ever… what I actually did, by the way, is that I swapped the so-o-ouls of those two. Louis here was trapped in Limbo just a few minutes ago-o-o."

The little girl nodded in conformation.

"What? How is something like that even possible, in fact? Soul transfer is feasible with magic, I suppose, but it can't be done flawlessly unless the souls are perfectly aligned."

Beatrice, being the daughter of the one who had failed to replicate what Sage had just done and a friend of the one who had not, struggled to understand.

"C'mon, Beako, is that really that surprisin'? The Authorities can do whatever the fuck you want. I mean, just compa-a-are this soul-manipulation-jutsu to the invincibi-i-ility, the endless shape-shiftin' or the mind-control that o-o-others have. Still kinda co-o-ol. Feeling pretty hu-u-ungry now tho. Side effect? A-a-anyway, I stumbled into Spica by readin' your book, Reid."

"Aye, makes sense. You barged into da Hall of Memories. Figured you'd find your way there eventually. Ya really liked to fuck around with da natural order or whatever da fuck you used to call Od Lagna back then."

"Ha-a-all of Memories? Is that what's that Limbo's called? Cool name. So, yeah, I just took her Gluttony usin' my awesome Sage voodoo. Oh, and sa-a-ame with Capella."

He couldn't really explain that he had the Witch Factor of Envy, so he just decided to just say that it was his unique Sage talent instead.

"So, what are we going to do with the Sin Archbishop? I guess, this one needs to be confined just like Wrath…"

"He-e-ey, lay off, Julius! I promised her she goes to the loli cre-e-ew, I'm not backin' down!"

"Wait, Subaru, do you re-e-ealy want to adopt Louis!? That's insane, you nincompoop!"

"First of all, Emilia-tan, no one says that anymo-o-ore. Second, it's Spica. And third, why are you saying that after I got Satella in the party? So "big, sca-a-ary, na-a-asty Witch" is okay, but neutered Archbishop isn't?"

"I mean, dat's a fair point, Flugel. Pretty sure Tella gettin' out of control would be a lot more catastrophic than this little one. I'd say we've got dat covered."

"Ugh, Subaru's eccentricities know no bounds, I suppose."

"Ya don't say, Great Spirit. I mean, did ya expect yo contractor to pull a pet Archbishop outta his a-... back pocket?"

"After Satella, Reid, and Volcanica? Not really, I suppose. Still, Betty's not going to be replaced by that..." "...hussy" "…cultist, in fact!"

Beatrice was pouting. Aggressively. First, it was the lousy half-elves stealing her rightfully earned head-pats, then it was the lesser healing spirit flirting with her contractor, then her Subaru bringing another little girl into the fold? Outrageous! Simply outrageous!

Without any warning, Sage pulled his favorite spirit closer, lifted her up and hugged her tightly.

"Ah! Stop it, stop it! You'll suffocate Betty!"

"Haha! Nope, not lettin' you go, Be-e-eako. Not until you get that silly thought out of your cu-u-ute head. Replace my Be-e-eako?! How co-o-ould I?! I mean I would literally die if I tried, first from Beatromin shortage and then from mana poisonin'."

"Do ya intend to die twice?"

He chuckled.

"Already went over fifteen."

"Mind, and the-e-en body, Anastasia."

"A-a-ah. I see."

Needless to say, the amount of attention that Subaru gave to his contracted spirit was overwhelming at the moment: hugs, spin-arounds, head-pats, praise, and so on. But eventually, after her desperate pleas to stop, the librarian was put down again. Of course, Great Spirit did not mind all of that, really, she was used to it. It was just very embarrassing. Nevertheless, she decided to stay close to him and hold his hand. Just in case her contractor had any ideas.

"So, yeah. I also pranked the E-e-elder Council. Bunch of pompous bra-a-ats."

"You what?!"

Emilia, Rem, Anastasia, and Julius looked at him in bewilderment.

"Ah, friend Flugel asked me to include a humorous jab in a Dragon Tablet."

"And what did Subaru write?"

"Dear companion of mine announced the great change approaching in Lugunica, denounced the ones that were vile and corrupt, and disclosed his legacy upon the unenlightened ones."

"Legacy?"

"He means the title of Sage."

Satella clarified the worlds of the Divine Dragon.

"I hope he did not mention you, Satella-sama. I doubt the general public would look favorably upon your partnership."

"He didn't."

"Well, in any case, that means we can't just sweep this whole incident in Priestella under da rug now. Not without explainin' somethin' to da Council. Fuck, Natsuki-kun. What's next, are ya gonna cause a diplomatic incident in yo next adventure?"

"Oh, that reminds me. That Ceci guy. I have to meet that one. Hm-m-m, might as well go to Volla-a-achia after we're done here."

"Ah, I shoulda not said that. Now we'll have an international crisis to deal with."

Julius facepalmed. He really thought it was over for now, but no, Sage's drunken shenanigans were only just beginning.

Others around the Sage sighed as well. Anastasia's prediction was probably correct.

"I mean, Subaru-kun said that he wanted to introduce his reforms outside of Lugunica."

"I don't think Anastasia thought he would be there in person, Rem. Still, Subaru, do you re-e-ealy want to go in there? Vollachia is very dangerous."

"Nah, Emilia-tan, I'll be fi-i-ine, I'm stacked. I have Authorities, Swo-o-ords, and all of you people. Besides, I'm pretty sure the princes in there have some kind of legal exemption or somethin'."

"Oh, yeah, ya being heir to the Vollachian Empire… I kinda forgot about that with all this wild shit ya've been getting us into lately."

She wasn't the only one who forgot that little detail.

"Eh, Flugel. I can't go."

"Why? Don't you wanna bang some chicks in there? Like la-a-ast time?"

"Mana body. Or have ya forgotten?"

"Oh, right… right... Wait, I can fix that. Oi, Volc, can you grab me one of the bi-i-ig witchbeasts? Preferably alive one."

"With ease, dear friend. Thy will be done."

In about five minutes, the Dragon brought back a half-beaten to death Centaur (or a "Hungry Horse King", if you go by words of certain witchbeast tamer).

"Yep, this one will do. Looks he-e-ella ugly. Just like Reid."

"Oi!"

The Sage grabbed Reid's hand and:

"A-a-anyway, Reid Astrea. Star Eating, phase one. Skado-o-osh."

-----

"You disgusting meatbag, how dare you come back!"

"Oh, he-e-ey, Capella. Nice to meet you, too."

"Ew, that's that hag? Just looking at her makes my innards spin…"

"Karmic punishment, I'd say. She wanted people to o-o-ogle her non-stop, but now just lookin' at her makes you cringe."

"So, ya just left her there?"

"Yep. You know, back in my ho-o-ome, that is a form of torture. Sitin' like that without any stimuli aro-o-ound you can drive anyone insane. Star Eating, phase two."

-----

"So that's it? I'm mortal again?"

"Well, let's check."

"Ah! Fuck, Flugel! Warn me next time!"

"Yep, that's no-o-ormal human blood. You're good to go."

"Welcome to the Witchbeast Club, Stick Swinger! So far, it's only you and me in here, though. The others don't talk sadly."

"Ha, you left that nasty scar… Is that the ugly mug of that thin'?"

"Eh, I guess so. Side effect of usin' those Ce-e-entaurs, perhaps?"

"Do I get da cool transformation too, 'ey?"

"You don't want to transform, trust me… I'm glad, that Master disabled the alarm upstairs before that jello cultist got in…"

"So, Subaru, your Authority of Gluttony can bring back the dead? Fascinating…."

Julius would be lying if he said that he wasn't interested in the idea of bringing back the dead. His birth parents came to mind. He knew that Felix could do it, via using the Sacrament of the Immortal King. But the talent and effort it required to successfully pull it off was immense, and the results were rather mixed. Compared to that, what Subaru had just done looked… simple.

He wasn't the only one.

Rem, Beatrice and Emilia looked at him with a mixture of bewilderment and expectation. Each of them had people that they wanted to bring back.

"I me-e-ean, I do need actual souls to still exist, but… ye-e-eah, I can. Reid was kinda the exception, tho, since he was still capable to walk among the livin' befo-o-ore. And I need is being able to reach the so-o-oul... Unle-e-ess, if I do own a medium that would help me reach it, like… Hm-m-m… Wait, that gives me an ide-e-ea… Let's get back to the Taygeta, I have somethin' that I wanna check."

-----

"And back to the Windows background land I go. I mean, I gue-e-ess it makes sense that you six won't be with Capella. Well, books do-o-o work, got it. Oh, and hi, Witches."

Just a few seconds prior, he had activated his Authority whilst touching the Typhon's Book of the Dead.

"Ba-a-aru! You came back!"

"Em-m-m… how did you… I m-mean Echidna did… am-m-m..."

"Subarun, it's ni-i-ice to feel your delicious sme-e-ell again."

"What are you doing here, baka! Dona will be really mad with you for breaching into the Castle of Dreams so suddenly!"

"Oh, where i-i-is she by the wa-a-ay?"

"Wait, are you drunk, you baka!?"

"Yep, lots of wild stuff ha-a-appened in the last six hours. All started with me bein' ha-a-ammered."

"Echidna is outside, ha-a-a… She's resting from the long journey, ha-a-a… I can relate..."

"Sekhmet, you moron! That was a secret!"

"Oh, she's alive. Wonder ho-o-ow… Well, that makes things easier, or maybe it's the o-o-other way around, knowin' her... A-a-anyway, where is she?"

"In Guste-e-eko. But this is not the same place you re-e-eached during trials, Subarun. It's a piece of it locked inside Dna Dna's pe-e-endant. She carries us with her."

"Cool, so li-i-iterally a pocket dimension? Nice. I guess I'll just grab her when I get to Guste-e-eko. Tell her to meet me there... somewhere. Or, you know, just tell her I sa-a-aid hi."

"So what are you going to do, Baru?"

"I'm just figurin' out my new trick. I'm gonna revive a-a-all of you. Being a ghost must be borin', ri-i-ight? Without Authorities, of course, but it's better than bein' dead. Sta-a-artin' with Typhon, since I had her Book of the Dead at hand."

"Echidna wo-won't like this…"

"Pf-f-f, as if I ca-a-are. Besides, I'm sure you want to walk among the livin', ri-i-ight? Well, maybe not you, Sekhmet, I'm sure you hate walkin', but like I can make you a mobility scooter metia or somethin'…"

"Oh, so you have the Gluttony, ha-a-a… I see. The things are progressing, ha-a-a…"

"Yes, Subarun smells ve-e-ery hungry. Relatable."

"Yeah, I would like a bottle of ma-a-ayo or two right 'bout now. Can't believe I'm agreein' with you of all people, Da-a-aphne. Oh, by the way, do you still remember that old mayo recipe? Turns out it got lost back there in the land of the livin'. Hopefully, it was as good as the store-bought."

"Mhm, I do-o-o, Subarun. I will share it with you once you get me out."

"Ok, cool, we have a deal. We-e-ell, time to go. Typhon?"

The little Witch nodded as she took the hand of black-eyed knight.

"You're a good person, Baru. I'll go with you."

"'lright then, see you soon, ladies. Star Eating, phase two."

-----

"Another one? Natsuki-kun, ya are breachin' your children acquisition quota."

"Precisely said, Anastasia-sama. Truly, the Lolimancer's desire for little girls has no bounds."

"Hey, assholes! You two make me look like a lolicon! I don't do kids!"

"Hm-m-m, she looks re-e-ealy flowery."

Emilia meant that literally. There were bunches of flowers growing straight out of her hair.

"So, she's like me then. She has some traits of that bear we caught."

"Looks quite pretty. Let's stick to flower bears for now."

"Typhon!"

"Tella! Ula! Volcy! Reid! Baru, you did not tell me that our friends are back here too."

"Oh, yeah ri-i-ight. Long story. In short, I got drunk, got a bunch of swords, ca-a-alled Tella. Then these three showed up, and then we went back to our old home a-a-afterwards."

"Looks different from what I remember."

"I mean, yeah, Tella-tan kinda did some landscapin' some time ago."

"No, I mean, it used to be me more lovely in here, Baru. It's just so empty…"

"Agreed, little one. Everythin' went to shit after Flugel was gone."

"Yeah, it was lonely without Master."

"It was…" "I missed him so much…"

"Aye, 'tis true. Our friend's absence has greatly affected us all."

"Hey, enough with the depressin' shit, you guys. I'm back, and now with even mo-o-ore friends. And probably even more overpowered, come to think of it… Regardless, since we a-a-are here, who's down to help me with some books? Need to get back to readin' to get the other Witches. Oh, and do we have any fo-o-od left? I'm starvin'."

-----

Half an hour later.

"Oh, hey, 'chidna. I'm here to grab Da-a-aphne."

"How? What are you doing here?"

"Oh, after witnessin' Beako's life story, the court ruled in my-y-y favor. I'm taking custody over the ki-i-ids."

"Kids?"

"Hehe, but seriously tho, the only ones who are so-o-omewhat mature are Tella and you, Dona. I mean, just lo-o-ok at them. Typhon and Daphne are actual children. Sekhmet is one of those lazy teenagers that you always need to drag to school in the mornin'. Carmilla is a high-school otome game protagonist. Finally, there's Minerva. Do I even need to explain tha-a-at one?"

"No."

"No-o-ope."

"No, ha-a-a…"

"N-no…"

"Hey! I'm not childish! Baka!"

Unfortunately, her current pouting expression did not prove Minerva's case.

"S-Subaru has found a way to bring us back to life. S-so we are coming with him."

"He drank way too much wine."

"Yes, I can see that, Minerva. What exactly do you need them for?"

To say that Echidna was irritated would be an understatement. She was recovering from a long trip that involved nearly falling into the frozen river (again), so she wasn't in her best mood right now.

"First of all, whiskey. Second, I dunno, co-o-ompany, I guess. My new Authority is basically soul manipulation, so I can just shove them into a witchbeasts' bodies. I've been rebuildin' the old crew with a bunch of new members added on top. We've got Vo-o-olc, Re-e-eid, Sha-a-aula, and Te-e-ella already. I'm still lookin' for Alec's and Farsale's books, but we'll get there. Oh, there's also Geuse, might wanna brin' tha-a-at one back, if he's not still insane. Wanna join too?"

"Sigh, it's her doing, isn't it? That obnoxious half-elf skank. Every plan and every contingency just went to ruin! Argh!"

"Hey, we do not insult Tella in this ho-o-ousehold. Besides, I'm pretty sure it was mostly my doin'. I kinda derailed whatever plan the past-me had. I'm just tha-a-at kind of RPG player, always goin' against the main plot."

"Sigh, alright. Can you ask her to bring me to your group?"

Just asking that was humiliating for the Witch of Greed, but she swallowed her pride.

"Mhm, I'll probably gonna need your location tho."

A map appeared out of the thin air. Echidna pointed to a specific spot on it.

"It's here."

"Ok, go-o-ot it. Oh, by the way, Daphne, I'm not sure if I can brin' the Coffin thin' with us."

"Hm-m-m, that's fine Subarun. I'll miss that one, but you do have Sco-o-orpi with you, do you not?"

"Yep, as I said, Shaula is with the cre-e-ew. You'll have some time to chat with your daughter. Star Eating, phase two."

The two disappeared in a flash of light.

Chapter Text

In the City Hall of Priestella, the part of the Emilia Camp that did not go to the Pleiades Watchtower continued the discussion. There was much to cover: events that had taken place in Priestella, revelations about the Sage and his old companions, knowledge that was Subaru had left them, and even plans for the near future.

"Fascinating, is it not? In just a mere hours, Subaru-kun managed to flip the entire Kingdom of Lugunica on its he-e-ead."

"With all due respect, Roswaal-sama, it's ill-advisable to overpraise Barusu. It will get into his head. Even if he's not here right now, don't feed his ego. Like a dirty mutt, Barusu is willing to break a neck for the slightest bit of approval. Especially if that approval comes from Emilia-sama."

"Ram, I am sure even you were quite surprised by the recent revelations, we-e-eren't you? I told you he is a rather spectacular ma-a-an."

"Yes, Ram did not expect him to be even more bizarre than you, Roswaal-sama. Ram admits that you were correct about that and that two of you are oddly similar, even if it makes Ram's stomach turn. But Barusu, like every other dog, needs a harsh discipline, first and foremost."

"Ha-ha, the first thing is certainly true, Ram, Subaru-kun is quite biza-a-arre, I just wish you were a tad bit more honest with yourse-e-elf."

"Ram is always honest, honesty is one of her defining traits."

"Along with your humility, 'ey, Ram?"

"Yes, Garf, Ram is exceptionally humble, unlike the three of you."

"Hey, what was that for?! I did not say anything!"

"Ha, Brotto got hit by a stray bullet."

Ram scoffed.

"So, you started using those weird Barusuisms too, Garf? How predictable. Always copying the irrelevant things that Barusu says, like a cockatoo."

Funnily enough, Ram did not even notice that she was using the same lingo as Garfiel.

"A cockatoo, heh. Ram, don't be a hypocrite, I'm pretty sure ya use a lot of Captain-speak too. Probably more often than I do."

"Urgh, Barusu's influence is contagious. Like a disease. I was exposed to it earlier than you."

Despite her gruff expression, everyone knew that Ram was actually a bit embarrassed by this habit of hers.

"Sigh, I'm more worried about what will happen when Natsuki-san finally gets fully sober."

"Yep, da Captain's gonna have da mother of all hangovers."

"Aside from that, Garfiel, we can not go back to the way things were now. Part of me things that the Royal Selection is not just halted, but canceled altogether. already."

"What do you mean, Otto-sama?"

"Well, Petra, if the Sage's plan comes to fruition, who will get the most credit for this success? Of course, the one who showed the most initiative and kick-started the whole reformation progress in the first place. I'm afraid it won't just end with the "Unfuck the World" part. Besides, Natsuki-san is already quite popular among the common people and has a reasonably decent reputation among the nobility. If his achievements continue to pile up at the same rate, I'm sure that in a few years, the crowd will literally carry him all the way to the Royal Palace and place him on the throne, whether he wants it or not. What happens next is anyone's guess."

"Otto-sama, do you mean, that his popular support will make him the replacement for the Council of Elders? In that case, I'm sure that Subaru-sama will make a fair transition of power after the Royal Selection is completed and the new queen is chosen."

"That's optimistic, Frederica. Power corrupts, you know. If anything, what would happen if the Sage, the Dragon, the First Sword Saint and the Wi- Satella barged into the Royal Palace and said that they would be the permanent rulers?"

"You don't need to. Barusu is not here. Call her however you want. He won't bash you with his sword."

"Well, Ram-san, you did not see what Natsuki-san did with those tables. Your sister had it easy. In any case, this is what worries me the most."

"Implyin' that Captain takin' over da reins will be bad for any of us."

"It won't, I guess..."

"In that case, Otto-kun, the Royal Selection would have a different purpose, would it no-o-ot?"

"What do you mean, Roswaal-sama?"

"It would be a selection of noble maidens, vying for the position of bri-i-ide. After all, the one closest to him will have a great sway on his decisions. And we all know who of the five has the greatest chances at victory. Both for the position of Subaru-kun's wife and for a future que-e-en."

Petra was pouting. She did not like the clown's answer. Not one bit.

"Nii-chan is quite popula-a-ar. But doesn't he already have many of wives – Nee-chan, Black Nee-chan, Scorpio Nee-chan and Oni Nee-chan? How is he gonna deal with them all?"

Petra began pouting even harder. She wasn't even on Meili's list!

"Huh, maybe that was an original reason for this Royal Selection in the first place. What if that was why it had to be maidens, specifically?"

"I mean, Brotto, can't we just ask da Dragon 'bout that?"

"Do you think he knows, Garfiel? There's no way Volcanica could have predicted all of this. You saw how surprised he was by Natsuki-san's "memory loss", didn't you?"

"When it comes to Subaru-kun, things often seem to go against the pla-a-an. Well, there should be another way to confirm something like that. Isn't that right, Otto-ku-u-un?"

Otto did have a way. There was a Book of Wisdom that he set out to repair in this city. Wait, was Roswaal aware of this? He sighed. That was to be expected from someone like him. Still, the book hadn't been repaired quite yet.

"Regardless, I think this party is pretty much over. Petra, Meili, shouldn't you both be asleep?"

"Su-u-ure, I'm tired already."

"Frederica-neesama, I'm old enough to stay with adults! Besides, Subaru-sama might return soon."

"Come on, Petra-chan, Subaru-sama and the others will probably sleep in the tower."

"Urgh, okay."

-----

"Can Mimi hang out with Garf?"

"No! The last time you "hung out" with Garfiel, we had to pull you off him."

"And the time before that, it nearly got you killed, sister."

"Urgh, alright. You always ruin all the fun. Mimi is bored, Mimi is going to nap."

"Kittens, I think the party is pretty much over, you should have some rest. I'd stay and keep watch."

"Of course, Ricardo. We are retiring too."

Tivey and Hetaro made sure to escort their very grumpy sister back to their rooms.

-----

On the other side of the room, another discussion was held.

"Grands- Reinhard. I want to apologize."

"Grandfather?"

"I want to apologize for what has happened. Both recently and when you were young. It was uncalled for coming from me. I… understand that you wanted to distance yourself from the fact that you had to end Theresia. I was just a stupid old man grieving for what I already a lost long time ago…"

"Ah, father. So you still think you can patch things up again? Even after you made it worse, like you always do?"

"I want to apologize to you as well, Heinkel. There's no more point in these arguments in our family anymore. For Theresia's and Louanna's sake."

"Ah, so you believe we won't be back at each other's throats again when the Sage is done doing whatever the fuck he wants?"

"No, I believe… I hope that we will not. I also believe that the Sage is capable of uniting the camps into a single cohesive unit that is capable of changing the world, and, in doing so, helping the three of us in the process."

"How optimistic. Do you trust in that lousy pup that much?"

"I do. I know that without Subaru-dono, the White Whale subjugation would have failed. I know that without him, Priestella would have been lost. I heard how the three of you managed to end Greed, Reinhard, it was necessary for him to be there. And there's one more thing that made me trust the Sage. Back before this chaos began, he was the one who asked me to seek reconciliation. For both my sake and for yours, Reinhard. I know he's your friend too."

"Ah, I see. That's why he was the one who was most upset. I ruined his efforts."

"Yes. And I can see how our situation might look frustrating from the outside. So I'll try again what I had tried back then. I am sorry. You are not some monster, Reinhard, the strength you had was frightening for this stupid old man, but you are the genuine person, first and foremost, and my grandson, of course, not a living weapon. Heinkel, you are not the failure you believe you are, you don't need to live up to any expectations, the important part is that you are my beloved son, and I'll do anything to help you in whatever situation you find yourself in. We will find a way to wake Louanna up together."

"How? The Sleeping Beauty disease..."

"… is likely connected to the Witch Cult. When Subaru-dono destroys it, that problem will be solved. It was one of his primary goals."

"Father..."

"I don't know how much trust you can place in the person you just met, but I trust the Sage explicitly. As do you, right, Reinhard?"

"Yes, that is right."

"'lright, let's see how it goes, Father."

"Ha, so the commoner actually made it work. Completely unintentionally, which is comical, but still. Touché."

The red-haired princess chuckled, clearly quite amused by this.

"Priscilla-sama, with all due respect, I can't allow you to interfere again. I have sworn to myself to resolve our situation.

"Yeah, get lost, bimbo. Nii-chan wanted these three to get along. So do I."

Priscilla wasn't the only one who overheard the discussion that Astrea family had.

"I have no intention of undermining his efforts, slum rat. I do wonder where did you found the resolve, old demon. You clearly did not have it before."

"It is not my own resolve, I merely borrowed it from the one who has it in abundance. I believe that the Sage is a miracle worker, and he can help us make this work when just my own efforts will be insufficient."

"I see. So you rely on him just like everyone else. Funny. Well, frankly, things have gotten a little stale around here lately. Without either the commoner or my other clown, no one here is capable enough to entertain me."

"Priscilla-sama, where is Sir Aldebaran, by the way?"

"'Tis unknown to me. He ran off like a pig about to be butchered just prior to the arrival of the Dragon. He has been absent ever since. Regrettably, even my Schlut is already asleep. Boys like him need a good rest to continue being adorable, of course. In any case, I'll be off as well. Don't embarrass yourself again, drunkard."

"As you say, Lady Priscilla."

"Oi, Rein?"

"Felt-sama?"

"I'm done too. Do you wanna stay?"

"It would be unwise to leave that early. We should stay until the end of the party."

"Well, I'm going. I need to sleep too, you know. If you want to stay, I'll assign you as my representative for the rest of this party."

"Do you need my h-…"

"No, I don't need an escort! C'mon, Rein, I'll be fine."

-----

Gradually, the city hall became emptier and emptier. The Vollachian princess wasn't the first one. Crusch and Felix left first, due to the former's poor health, leaving only Wilhelm as the camp's representative. Joshua and the Pearlbaton triplets soon followed, as Ricardo was capable enough to pass on anything useful from the other camps to his employer if he was asked to. In a few hours, the Emilia Camp retired as well, leaving only their Internal Affairs Officer to stay until the official end of the party. Kiritaka and Liliana were eventually gone too, as were the Ton-Chin-Kan trio (they left along their ring leader). After about three to four hours after Sage's departure, the dining hall was almost empty, leaving the servants to clean up the mess. Reinhard, being the last person left (he never needed too much sleep anyway), decided to help them out.

"Subaru left quite a ruckus. Still, that was a rather unforgettable night."

-----

Some time ago.

He was tired. After dashing across the ruined city and grabbing the tamest ground dragon he could find, he simply pointed the beast into the right decision and let it do the rest. It was only a matter of time 'till he would be suspected, so gaining a few days and vanishing somewhere, hoping no one would find him, was the only choice he felt was valid. He hoped that he could hide in Kararagi, for he knew that the chances of successfully completing the task his Teacher had given him had gone from astronomically low before to near impossible when she arrived. And after he witnessed the Dragon descent as he ran to the stables, he threw that idea out of his head completely. Staying with the Princess was certainly not an option either, he wasn't valuable enough to be kept safe.

"Fuck, let's hope this can buy me some time."

-----

"So what are we going to do about "the Sage"?"

"What do you think we can do, Bordeaux, you've seen the Dragon Tablet."

"There's no way it's authentic! Just apprehend him for insulting our heritage!"

"Are you fucking stupid? Did you not learn after the first time? Apprehending the knight of the Royal Candidate, the one who slayed the White Whale and the Sloth, the one who's favored by the Court Mage, and the one called a National Hero? That's the fastest way to a popular uprising! Even if he's not the Sage."

"I do agree with Marcos. I think it is authentic writing. Let's imagine it isn't, Bordeaux, how do you think he is able to write on the tablet?"

"…"

"My theory is that the boy is a friend of the Divine Dragon, and these two struck some sort of agreement. That means that no one standing against them politically has any real chance. Unless you want to beg for help from the outside forces."

"What if we sic the Sword Saint on him?"

"And defy the Dragon in the process?"

"So, what, you just think we should just cooperate while pleading to be left in our positions? Don't be stupid, Miklotov!"

"Not pleading. Frankly, we just need to make our case for being here, and then we can continue working. Things may change, but not necessarily for the worse. And if things go well, we might even be better off."

"Insane, absolutely insane! You are staking your position on the theory that this upstart is both merciful enough not to replace us and competent enough not to ruin this country!"

"You have to make peace with this, Bordeaux. I know you hate Lady Emi-"

"It's not about the half-devil, I know she's just a pawn for either that upstart or Roswaal, that was obvious enough after the first meeting. It's about the boy declaring a takeover!"

"As I said, if things go well, we could benefit from it. We just need a way to influence the person who has the most sway over him. Swallow your pride, Bordeaux. If my intuition is correct, the Sage and his companions will visit us sooner or later."

-----

Kadomon wasn't a religious man. He knew that many people praised the Divine Dragon for the safety and prosperity he had brought to Lugunica – something that he appreciated, but he could not say that he'd worshiped the thing. Until today, the Dragon was someone far removed from the life of a fruit seller.

It was a fairly normal start of the day for him. One of his suppliers, an old lady named Vanessa, owned an appa tree orchard. She was an early bird by nature, and, from what he heard, t took her two days to get here, so she always arrived on Mondays way before sunrise. Accordingly, he had to get up early (which he hated, but what can you do) to arrange for the woman's safe passage through the front gates, and at the same time, to check the quality of the produce. So he had to leave the house before either his lovely Raksha or his adorable daughter could wake up.

He was on the way to the guard post when something unusual happened on this seemingly ordinary day. At first, he almost did not notice the large shadow that covered the moonlight, but then he heard a girly screech and:

"-baru, pull up or we're gonna-"

Before Kadomon could hear anything else or even raise his head in the direction of the male voice, the shadow above him passed over him. Soon, he found the source of said shadow, eclipsing the full moon in the sky:

"The Divine Dragon?!"

He wasn't the first one to report this, of course, but the guards overseeing this event still listened to his testimony.

"The fuck?! Now you're telling me someone rode that thing?"

"Yes, I heard two voices, one female, one male."

"Which direction was it coming from?"

"I was coming here from the Merchant District when he flew over me."

"West, then, huh? Ah, fuck, Aren, just send the newbie to the Royal Castle, let them deal with this."

"Oh yes, one more thing, the reason I came here in the first place. In half an hour, an old woman will arrive here with a carriage full of appas.. Can she be given safe passage?"

"Ah, you're that seller guy, Kadomon? Yeah, Tavik told me about you. We can work something out."

The fruit vendor's troubles did not end on there, however. The woman arrived on time and passed without an issue, and soon two of them were near his stall. He had to pay extra to bribe the guard, since Tavik had called in sick, but at least it worked out. After some time, as he finally finished with unloading the produce from the wagon and considered letting the woman go:

"Oh, the Benevolent Dragon! What was that?"

A sudden earthquake knocked a wheel off the shabby old carriage.

"Oh, dear, oh, dear. The wheel is broken. How will I get back all on my own! Kind sir, could you help this old woman to put it back in place?"

So it took him one more hour to help the poor old hag before he could finally load up the fresh batch of goods into the stall. Naturally, he was quite annoyed by this incident. Unfortunately, it was only the beginning of this wild day.

Chapter Text

"Oh, everything is shaking…"

"Woah, caught you."

Before the Witch could fall to the ground, Emilia managed to catch her in an embrace.

"Oh, thanks. You're the one from the trials, right?"

"Yes, that's me. Subaru told me about you, Minerva."

"Sorry for the precautions back then. Echidna asked me to keep you in the dark about the others."

"It is fine. Are you feeling better?"

"Yes. Was that supposed to happen?"

"That's normal, Ner Ner."

"Y-yes, resurrection feels very disorienting at first."

"Yes, the side effects of Subaru's Authority include headache, hunger, and drowsiness, I suppose. Just look at Daphne and Sekhmet."

The former was currently finishing off the remaining rations, while the latter was taking a nap right there on the rough sand.

"Nah, that seems normal, actually. Pretty sure Master has nothing to do with that. Mom's always hungry. As for the Sleepyhead, she is often like that."

"Ya also forgot 'bout turnin' into a half-beast, Ankle-Biter."

"Stop calling Betty that, show some respect, in fact!"

"Nah, the Great Spirit card won't work on us two. Both Bimbo and I are four hundred years old, and she's da Great Witchbeast, while I'm da strongest Dragon Slayer there is."

"Hmph!"

"Yo, Reid, don't be mean to Beako!"

"Eh, okay, Flugel. She's a good lass since she helped ya out, I just don't like the altitude."

"'lright, a-a-anyway, now that Nerva is back, only Dona is left, and we are do-o-one! Witches' Tea Party, Part Two would be asse-e-embled! Tella, can you help? Dona's alive, but she's in Gusteko, ri-i-ight he-e-ere."

Subaru pointed at the spot on the map that he had yanked from Julius's hands.

"Mhm, on it."

"Mother is alive?"

"Yeah, I ki-i-inda forgot to ask how exactly she brought herself ba-a-ack, but she's the-e-ere. I met her when I was bringin' the o-o-others back."

Beatrice's eyes glowed with excitement, while both half-elves felt uneasy, albeit for different reasons.

"Oh, yeah. There's also this one too-o-o, I guess."

The Sage picked up another book.

"We-e-ell, let's try this o-o-out. Star Eating, phase one."

-----

"Master?"

"You again, meatbag!?"

"Shut the he-e-ell up, Capella."

Before she could react, he knocked her out with a bonk by Reality Slasher.

"Annoyin' hag. A-a-anyway, glad you sound sane, Geuse."

"What… happened… I remember things… I remember the horror… that I caused… Emilia! Fortuna! Wait, the Cult… the Ordeal… you… you have killed me, Master..."

"'lright, the memories seem to be intact. As for tho-o-ose two – the first one's fine, Emilia-tan is with me. As for the se-e-econd one, well, I don't know if I can brin' her back."

"Master, what exactly did you do?"

"Oh, this? I've just yanked you out of Od Lagna's gra-a-asp. At least that's what this Authority seems to be capable of do-o-oin'. Now all we have to do is designate a body for you to return to a-a-and... Ba-a-am! Back to the wo-o-orld of the livin'!"

"Master, I don't deserve this… I've done so much harm…"

The green-haired spirit began to shed tears.

"Of course you fuckin' did! I don't fuckin' excuse you for tha-a-at! You have no-o-o goddamn idea how much headache you've created for me! Sti-i-ill, it's fine because you're the old Geuse and not the "MY BRAIN TRE-E-EMBLES!"-Geuse. We need more friends."

"Master…"

"For fuck's sake, stop wailin', you crybaby. Your adopted daughter is waitin' fo-o-or you. That bein' said, one thin' I don't get is: what exactly happened with Slo-o-oth? Since old-me's memory has been rese-e-et, I need some info. Emilia told a bit, but she's hidin' things. Dunno why."

"I was charged with keeping the Witch Factor safe for you, and upon hearing the news of your arrival, delivering Sloth, myself, and my subordinates to your service, Master. We had a contract."

"Ah, shi-i-it. Another four hundred year promise. We-e-ell, go on."

"At the same time, my goal was also to watch over Lady Emilia and her community."

"The elven village. Heard 'bout that."

"The invasion of the Witch of Vainglory and the Archbishop of Greed ruined all of that. I became desperate and… I was never a lazy person…"

"Witch Factor incomparabi-i-ility. Heard that tale with Tella. What happened ne-e-ext?"

"I… the Witch Factor combined with Pandora's influence… I have… I have… killed her. Her foster mother… Fortuna."

"A-a-and?"

"I don't blame Lady Emilia, she was just a child in a state of shock… Her magic went out of control. It froze her and the entire Elior Forest."

"A-ha, so tha-a-at's the reason she wants to be a ru-u-uler. Damn, no wonder she kept that from me. Why was Pandora there?"

"The Seal. She came to open the Seal."

"Wait, Tella's thin' is underground in Augu-u-uria."

"The other Seal. Not the one restraining Satella-sama."

"Oh, okay. What is it fo-o-or?"

"Unknown to me. It was your and the Witch of Greed's project."

"Ah, cra-a-ap! Another fuckin' mystery. Another centuries-old fuck up."

"Emilia-sama has the key for it. That was the reason why it all happened."

"We-e-ell, we'll figure things out as we go-o-o. Now let's go back. I can't promise another contract coz I have Beako, but we can hang out just like befo-o-ore."

"I will go wherever you lead me, Master."

"Oh, by the way, we already have Volc, Reid, Shaula, Tella and all the other Witches on board, plus a couple of friends I met before I met my old buddies. 'lright, take my ha-a-and. Star Eating, phase two."

-----

"Emilia-tan, I have an early bi-i-irthday present for you."

"Geuse!"

"Emilia!"

Before anyone could react, the two rushed into a deep embrace.

"Lady Emilia, please stay back, we are not certain Pe-"

"Rem doesn't smell Miasma on him."

"Yup, Crybaby is clear."

"Shush, Julius, don't you think I won't check if he's fi-i-ine before I bringin' him back?"

"Oh… My apologies then."

The purple-haired knight quickly sheathed the blade that he had drawn in a panic.

Anastasia chuckled:

"This is gettin' out of hand, now there are two of them. First that Gluttony, now Sloth?"

"Uau!"

The former rushed towards the Sage and hid behind his back, seeking protection. The others were still very cautious with the former Archbishop of Gluttony, after all. Utilizing his greatest technique, Subaru calmed Spica down rather easily.

"It's a long and fucked up story, as it tu-u-urns out. From what I've got, he was no-o-ormal before the Sloth debacle happened. Since I brought him in without it, his mind is pe-e-erfectly clear tho. Just some PTSD left to deal with, but tha-a-at's better than nothin'."

"I'm sorry, dear… I'm so sorry for her..."

"No, don't be! I understand it was her, always her! She's the one who killed Mother Fortuna, not you! Please! I'm just re-e-ealy glad that you are here now."

"A-a-ah… You're so kind, Emilia..."

The eyes of the spirit were full of tears.

"Geuse!"

"Oh, hey, Betty. Master told me you made a contract."

"We did. Subaru is the best contractor there is, as deserved by Betty, in fact!"

"O-o-ow, I'm flattered."

"Master is an extraordinary person."

"Betty's Subaru doesn't like it when I say this, but he is the one for Betty. You know that one. If there was supposed to be the one, I suppose."

"Hmm, I had a sneaking suspicion. Maybe you were the reason for Betty's creation, Master."

"No! Just, no! I will not accept that Beako is just some sick birthday present from Do-o-ona! No fuckin' way! And, Beako, stop with the "tha-a-at person" thin'. I thought I taught you – it was not about fulfillin' the stupid contract with Echidna, it was about choosin' to break it and do what you wa-a-ant!"

"See, he's always like that. One thing that he and Betty can't agree on."

"It's still a great thing. I'm glad that you Betty and Master are happy."

"She is not that, by the way. I made her for a different purpose."

"Oh, he-e-ey, Dona! Wait, what the hell?"

"I brought her before you returned, dear. She's… different now."

"Took you long enough, bitch."

"You were hard to find in your new body."

Oddly enough, the silver-haired half-elf paid little attention to her insults.

"New… Wait, you used one of the Ryuzus as pro-o-oxy?"

"Correct. Shima, to be exact."

"I thought she di-i-ied. So, she survived the Sanctuary… 'til you used her as a ve-e-essel... Hold on, you killed her!"

"It was her purpose. I'd say she met a rather peaceful end, however, won't you say? A simple erasure, completely painless. She is overwritten just like you overwritten the souls of those beasts."

"Kinda not true, Dona. Ya don't look like yo old self."

"But of course, Reid. I am not claiming that my spellcasting skills are superior to an Authority."

"Well, we can pro-o-bably find her book..."

"I don't think you can bring her back even with your Authority. She's not so much dead, more like changed to fit my soul instead."

"Ah, fu-u-uck. You could have just waited… We-e-ell, now only Hoshin and Farsale remain. Let's go back to the library."

"That won't work either."

Echidna simply stated it as a matter of fact.

"Why not?"

"You intend to use the books to reach for their souls, correct?"

"We-e-ell, yeah. Why do you ask?"

"Do you know them?"

"Know them?"

"You've already met us before, Subarun, so you were able to read our books. But do you have me-e-emories of Lec Lec or Farsy?"

"I mean, there were very brief mentions in yo-o-our books."

Subaru remembered how the first book that he tried to read did not actually do anything. Was it because he did not know the person before?

"B-but they were very brief, r-right? I d-did not know either much, and neither did the others. T-that means that you w-won't be able to…"

"...find them, ha-a-a…"

"Besides, their souls have probably already been recycled by Od Lagna, baka! Dona preserved us Witches."

"What 'bout me then?"

"You, Pervert, were saved by his ritual. You were in-between, bound to the tower and its trials."

"And what about me?"

"Geu Geu, Subarun probably carried your soul along with Slo-o-oth."

"That means we won't have all of Baru's friends with us? Aw-w-w…"

Typhon looked sad. She liked people that were hanging out with Baru back then.

"Unless, he manifests another Authority in a certain way, no. At least not right now."

"Don't wo-o-orry Typhon, we'll figure things o-o-out."

In just a few head-pats, the Witch of Pride's mood was returned back to normal.

"So, Beako, are you happy to have your Mom back?"

"Betty is happy, I suppose, but… Mother feels weird…"

"Weird?"

"Incomplete."

"Ah, that might be due to my failed experiment, Betty."

"That could be the reason, I suppose."

"Failed experiment... You're talkin' about usin' Ryuzus to body hop, ri-i-ight?"

"Exactly. Another fragment of my soul still walks among the living. She's called Sphinx."

"Sphinx? That's the name of one of the most important figures in the Demi-Human War."

Julius knew the history of the Demi-Human War like the back of his hand.

"This also makes sense. Although her exact actions are not completely clear to me, I can predict her main goal."

"Goal?"

"She wants to become me. The original me. To fulfill her purpose of being."

"Well, there's thi-i-is Dona and then there's Sphi-i-inx, who is another Dona. Are there any other Echidnas we should know 'bout?"

"My name is Echidna, technically, but I don't think I possess any parts of the soul of my creator."

Anastasia's fox spirit finally revealed herself to the others. Most were surprised by this revelation, but not the Sage.

"Oh, fi-i-inally you stopped hidin'. By the way, I told Julius 'bout you."

"Natsuki-kun?"

"Yep, I figured all out, 'nastasia. So… Foxchidna? I assume you like Puck or Beako?"

"In a way, yes. Albeit it seems that all three of us are different in certain ways and made for different purposes."

"Correct."

"Damn, that's like talking to two Donas at the same time. One was insufferable enough!"

"Calm down, Minerva. She inherited some mannerisms, but nothing else really. She was a Plan B after Plan A of Soul Transference project had failed. However, I did not have time to finish it."

"Ah, I see, Creator. I was made as an alternative proxy…"

"Yes."

"So, 'bout Sphinx – do you ha-a-appen to know where she is? I mean, I could like… you know… smash the two halves together to make one who-o-ole Dona."

"Vollachia is her current zone of operation. Although there is a side hustle in Kararagi."

"How are you aware of her, Lady Echidna?"

"We are two parts of the same whole. Besides, I am one of the most proficient spellcasters there is."

"Okay, one mo-o-ore reason to go to Vollachia. 'lright, let's have a nap and then we can go-o-o there."

"Subaru-u-u!"

"What? Why, do you look upse-e-et, Emilia-tan?"

"You forgot about the Council of Elders, you dunderhead! You made them worry with your kooky jokes!"

"No one says tha-a-at anymore."

"Hm-m-mph!"

The Royal Candidate turned away from him in frustration, crossed her hands and began to pout theatrically.

"You know, Natsuki-kun, she's right. We need to clear up some misunderstandings and tell them about yo plan."

"Ah, okay, just stop naggin'! Ne-e-ew plan! Go back to Priestella, gra-a-ab other Candidates and their knights, so it's legitimate. Go to the Capital, visit those ne-e-erds, bully them to our si-i-ide, then start a revolu-u-ution in Vollachia."

"Bully?"

Julius shivered. Given what the Sage had done up until this point, he was fully expecting the worst.

"Revo… what?"

Ever since the lecture in Priestella, Anastasia had started writing down every foreign word that came out of Subaru's mouth.

"Revolution is when..."

"No, Shaula, don't expla-a-ain. Otherwise, they'll start naggin' even mo-o-ore."

"Sure, Master!"

This was not reassuring. Still no one had a clue how to dissuade the Sage from doing something radical.

The only thing left to figure out was the logistics.

"So, how are ya gonna transport us all, Natsuki-kun? I don't know if ya've noticed, but we've nearly doubled in size."

"Myself can carry a greater load. 'Tis not a great deal."

"I can help too. I've brought others to Priestella."

"No need, you two. I have a ne-e-ew trick. Behold…"

Suddenly, the Sage's form was enveloped in white light.

-----

Lust.

Subaru was an eighteen-year-old teenager. So, as a guy in the prime of his life, he had a decent libido. Of course, since Beako was around him most of the time, along with the heavy amount of daily duties he had to perform, he had neither the time nor the will to indulge in what most boys without a girlfriend at his age usually did. Not that he hadn't ever imagined Emilia or Rem without clothing. Of course he did. He imagined other things, too. So the Lust wasn't something foreign to him.

Lust was a burning hot in his chest. Like an ember that he felt every time he gazed at the people around him. They were all so beautiful. In a way, that was true for all the people that he happened to know well enough, bar a few exceptions. In one way or another, he loved them all. There were obvious ones, like Emilia-tan, Rem or Satella-tan – he adored them. There were also people he found conventionally attractive, but never actually made a move on, like Ram, Frederica, Crusch, Priscilla and Anastasia – he appreciated them and their beauty. There were people that he found aesthetically pleasing (mostly fellow men) like Otto, Garfiel, Reinhard, Wilhelm, Al, Ricardo, and even Julius – he was inspired by them. There were also people he just found really cute in a making you squeal kind of way, people he liked to play silly games with or spoil rotten, like Beatrice, Petra, Meili, the Arlam children, Ryuzus, Mimi, Hetaro, Tivey, Felt, and even Patrasche (though he was certain that "the best girl" would be mad at him for placing her there) – they were his joy. And in this crazy adventure, he had already met quite a few new (and old) people to add to his lists.

In general, there were plenty people he liked in one way or another. There was just one person that he knew very well, too well, and yet found him utterly revolting. Ugly, short, thin, messy-haired, with that annoying, unsettling stare and that loud voice, always over the top, but not in a good way, all talk, but with nothing to back it up.

Ever since he hit puberty, he started hating the way he looked. He always wanted to be someone else, anyone but Natsuki Subaru. This feeling never went away even in this world. Sometimes he wanted to be it like one of his many friends. Sometimes he felt that even that wouldn't be enough, that it would be better if he was someone completely different.

-----

As the light faded, the others were surprised yet again. Holding each other's hands were two little girls – one was known to the Sage party, while the other one looked like a newcomer. The two looked like twins, or at very least close relatives. They had the same height, the same type of extravagant dress (but in a different color scheme), the same adorable puffy face, the same drill-like hair (though the "new girl" had it dyed black) and even the same crown accessory.

"… my u-u-ultimate form, I suppo-o-ose!"

"That's uncanny, in fact!"

Chapter Text

"That's uncanny, in fact!"

Obviously Beatrice was weirded out by her newfound "twin". It was like looking into a broken mirror.

Others from the Sage's crew had different reactions: some were mildly amused (like Volcanica and most of the Witches); some found Bettybaru rather cute (like Rem and Satella) and looked at him/her with puppy eyes; some of them could barely keep their composure (like Julius, Geuse and Anastasia); while some laughed quite openly (like the Reid and Shaula); finally there was Emilia, who stared at her knight in confusion.

"Subaru?"

"Wha-a-at is it, girl- I mean, Emilia-tan. Da-a-amn, those mannerisms, in fact. I can't get them out of my mo-o-outh! Looks like they are preprogrammed, I suppose."

"This is re-e-ealy weird."

"They are innate, if that's what you mean."

Echidna was once again enraptured by the Sage. Yet another rather curious manifestation of Authority. To her, Subaru's potential seemed endless.

"Why the fuck? That's very annoyin', in fact. It's like a compulsion, I suppose."

"Now you know about Betty's daily struggles, in fact."

"I thought it would be an interesting quirk. Curious to see that you copied even that."

"Cool, so-o-o, I'm like the Great Spirit now, I suppose! That's so a-a-awesome! Beho-o-old Beakobaru's unlimited powah! Al Shamak!"

The people around the Sage thought that the "Great Spirit" was just messing around. They were wrong. In an instant, the space in front of him/her shattered, creating a pathway to another dimension. It was a real full-power Al Shamak, just like the one that was used to banish the Great Rabbit.

"Si-i-ick!"

"Subaru! What's going on? Your gate is working normally, in fact!"

"Beakobaru, call this fo-o-orm Beakobaru!"

"Hm, even the properties of Betty's gate have been copied. Fascinating…"

"But where from did Subaru get the mana from?"

The answer to Julius' question came from Satella.

"From me. Our relation is somewhat similar to a spiritual contract."

"Yup, and I also reinforced it with Cor Leonis. It's a-a-awesome, in fact. Although, delegatin' Tella as a mana battery seems ki-i-inda derogatory, I suppose. Come to think of it, I was a sla-a-ave driver to you today, Tella-tan."

She smiled as she made sheep's eyes at the little girl. Satella was just happy to be at his/her side.

"I don't mind. I'm happy to help."

"Now Betty is being replaced by her own contractor, I suppose. Outrageous. Hmph!"

"He-e-ey, I'm just experimentin', Beako! I don't plan to stay like that a-a-all the time, in fact. Just the height difference alone is disorientin', I suppose."

"Natsuki-kun. I'm not questioning yo wisdom, but…"

Anastasia barely held back a laugh.

"… how would turnin' yoself into a little girl help ya transport us to Priestella?"

"Slow down, 'nastasia. I'll expla-a-ain. Let me just figure out some stuff 'bout my superpower, in fact. Tella-tan, can you take my ha-a-and? I wanna see if this works the way I think it does."

While the half-elf immediately understood his next intention, she had other ideas. She did not just take the hand of the little Sage. Instead, she scooped Bettybaru up into her arms and:

"You are so cu-u-ute!"

Unfortunately for Subaru, this transformation flipped the wrong switch in the mind of Sage's patron. In truth, she loved him/her regardless of what form Sage would take. And, just like the black-eyed knight, she liked Betty – the little girl was absolutely adorable. For her, this was the best of both worlds – her love took what made the Great Spirit of Yin cute and then added his/her own personal touches.

So it wasn't long before Subaru found himself pressed against her cleavage. It would've been comfortable if not for the lack of air.

"Ah! -elp! I'm be-… *inhale* ...being smu-u-ushed, I suppose!"

This was the last straw for those who tried to prevent themselves from laughing. Anastasia was the first of the three to laugh. Just a couple of hours ago, her spirit had been trying to fish for some information about the past of Emilia's knight. Now she looked at him/her being bear-hugged by the living calamity. This whole thing was certainly... an experience. Others soon joined her.

"Hah! I can't! Natsuki-kun! Aha-ha-ha!"

"This is certainly a predicament befitting the Sage… ha-ha-ha-ha… Ahem, my apologies, Anastasia-sama."

"Don't be, Purplehead! Master is hilarious!"

"Let him go! Subaru is my knight! Only I can… I mean, let him go, Satella!"

Emilia did her best trying to wrestle Bettybaru out of her hands, adding even more chaos to the whole situation. Spica tried her best too, but tugging at the Satella's dress and mumbling didn't really help.

"So that's what it is like being Lolimanced, huh?"

In a panic, Subaru flipped through various solutions to this… predicament. Tella wasn't listening to reason, Emilia-tan was pulling him/her in a rather painful fashion, and everyone else was too busy laughing their asses off to notice. Using magic also did not work either – as it turns out, it was utterly impossible to concentrate on the spell matrix while being pressed against someone's tits. He/she had only two choices: risk by invoking the taboo ("if Envy wakes up, this will be even messier") or try to use the Authority again, like he/she had originally intended to.

The form of the Sage began to glow again, briefly interrupting the two half-elves. As the light around him faded yet again, a new face of the Sage was revealed. The result was rather predictable: long, pointy ears, silver hair with two black streaks, and an outfit that was a weird fusion of both the Royal Candidate's and of the one called Witch of Envy – it was a mirror of Emilia's, but in black color, with familiar roses scattered across it. He/she even had hair attachments of both girls – an eight-edged star on one side and a black rose on the other.

Predictably, the laughter stopped, and Subaru finally had a moment to breathe.

"*inhales* Phe-e-ew, that re-e-ealy worked. So what are we gonna call this form, Ha-a-alfelfbaru?"

It was Emilia's turn to be weirded out.

"Woah… I can understand Beako now… This is re-e-ealy uncanny. More uncanny than Satella herself..."

"I said don't call Betty like that! Only Subaru can call Betty in that way, in fact!"

"Sorry!"

Meanwhile, Satella had just discovered a new thing about herself. Something she wasn't aware of right until now:

"Damn, he/she's hot… Wait, that's supposed to be me… I mean… Could that be considered to be self-love in a way..? Alright, Satella, this is weird even for you, let's stop that line of thought."

"Oka-a-ay, that works the way I thought it would work. I wonder what will happen if I'll copy Re-e-ein..."

Echidna was quick to stop Subaru's enthusiasm:

"Nothing much, Reinhard is favored by Od Lagna. It's the primary source of his strength. At best, you'd be above average."

"Y-yes, our Authorities are h-highly antagonistic to the w-world anyway."

"Wait, re-e-eally? So, none of you Witches had any Divine Protections?"

"No… ha-a-a…"

"No."

"N-no."

"Nope, Subarun."

"No, dear."

"You don't need them to judge the bad guys."

"Of course not, you baka!"

All seven confirmed it. Sage was rather disappointed.

"Da-a-amn, that sucks. Oh hey, I can turn into Reid inste-e-ead!"

"I mean, sure. I'm not gonna be creeped out by this like da others. But like, it's not just a pure talent, ya know. Still, that could work if ya need to kick someone's ass and ya don't have any of us around."

Straight away, Sage and Stick Swinger high-fived, and Halfelfbaru became Reidbaru.

"Damn, I look ki-i-inda sick."

"No shit, ya're me. Da hottest dude in existence."

More than a few begged to differ.

Reidbaru did not last too long, however, as after a few minutes of striking fighting poses with his chopsticks, he instead approached Volcanica.

"Now… Let's try thi-i-is form out!"

"Oh, I seeth thy reason, dear friend."

As he touched Volcanica, the form of the Sage began to glow yet again. This time, the glow began to expand and expand and expand even more. Others had to pull back to not be caught in the radius. Soon the glow faded, revealing a new form – Dragonbaru or Subarulcanica (he wasn't sure which one he liked the most) – a giant black dragon.

"Holy shit! That's so-o-o sick! I'm a fuckin' dragon!"

A deafening roar enveloped Augria, as the Dragonbaru celebrated his coolest trick so far. It wasn't as batshit insane like Return by Death, but it was certainly the flashiest supermove he'd acquired. Before long, he began to do what everyone else would do in this situation – fly around on his new wings and use his dragon breath. It took him about ten minutes before the excitement of spewing raw mana all over the place and doing aerial tricks like he's some renowned gymnast finally faded. To end this demonstration, he dived-bombed back down to the ground, raising tons of sand into the air in the process. Once the sand settled, the Sage was already back in his usual form, still coughing out the consequences of his final trick.

"'lright... *cough*... no more... *cough*… dive-bombin'. Noted."

"You looked really excited there, Natsuki-kun."

"What are you talkin' abo-o-out? Of course, I was! I mean, I was a fuckin' dra-a-agon!"

As he looked at the others, he became more and more outraged: most people were confused, some were neutral, some were irritated, while others looked mildly amused. He couldn't understand, aren't people worshiping Volc? How could no one relate to him?

"The fuck? It's a fuckin' dra-a-agon! That's like the coolest thin' you can be! You're hu-u-uge, stro-o-ong, can fly, ro-o-oar, and breathe fi-i-ire! That's cool, people!"

Not even Shaula understood the hype behind this.

"What the he-e-ell! Is it another cultural difference again!? Urgh!"

His complaints were ignored, as Echidna took the reins of the conversation:

"Well, this certainly solves our issue. I assume we can retire for the night now."

"I don't understand. How is Subaru being a dragon help us?"

"As slow as the last time I had the misfortune of meeting you, half-wit."

"We'll fly on my ba-a-ack, Emilia-tan."

"Oh, I get it! Tomorrow you'll transform into Volcanica, and half of us will mount you, while the others will ride the Divine Dragon."

"Yep."

"In any case, we can fly to Priestella tomorrow after breakfast."

"Sorry, Dna Dna. There is no more bre-e-eakfast."

"Ah, I see, Daphne. You have already finished our supplies."

Needless to say, Echidna was once again mildly irritated.

"We didn't bring much. We didn't think we gonna have all of you here. Subaru-kun will have to fly on an empty stomach."

Back then, Rem had thought about grabbing some extra food before departing the party, but Emilia convinced her to travel light.

"I mean, there were still witchbeasts around the place…"

"Nope, Bimbo. Don't even think 'bout it. They taste like shit."

"I mean, I was feeding on them for four centuries…"

"Yeah, and it ruined yo taste buds, Shaula."

Subaru quickly forgot his previous outrage when he heard their intentions to retire for the night. In truth, his recent aerial acrobatics had almost drained him of the remaining energy.

"Oka-a-ay then, time to sleep."

Suddenly, a heavy wave of fatigue hit Emilia, Beatrice, Anastasia, Julius, Shaula, and Echidna simultaneously. Everyone else felt mildly wearier too.

"I feel re-e-ealy sleepy..."

"Damn, me too...what's happenin'..?"

"I disabled Cor Leonis."

"Hold on, you were taking all the burden again, you baka!?"

"Yup."

"Wait, Subaru-kun, you were taking our fatigue? But you felt very normal… very aware."

"It's alcohol, no doubt, maid. The whiskey seems to give Betty's Subaru more energy, I suppose."

"Subaru, that's re-e-ealy irresponsible!"

"Emilia, don't be mad at him. Flugel-sama knows best. Besides, nothing you do will change his generosity. He's far too kind."

"But he always gets hurt, Geuse! And makes me really worried."

"Don't wo-o-orry, Emilia-tan, I'm fi-i-ine. I mean, I have great experience with all-nighters, bein' neet and all. Though I guess I'm losin' my touch."

A long yawn that followed, was the confirmation of Subaru's words.

"'liright, nap time, people. He-e-ey, little guy, can you make me like a plant chair or somethin'?"

This was addressed to the spirit he found in the green room, that was still following the Sage.

So the crew finally went back to the Pleiades Watchtower.

-----

A little while later...

Emilia was uneasy. Usually she had zero issues falling asleep and resting soundly until late in the morning (in fact, some people in the manor told her that she was always oversleeping), but today it felt different. She felt tired, but she couldn't actually sleep. Maybe it had something to do with the sheer amount of things that had occurred during the past week. The journey to Priestella ended in disaster; then she had been captured by the Sin Archbishop and eventually rescued by Subaru and Reinhard; then they had barely won against Regulus; then the aftermath, the reconstruction and all the worries associated with that; then the party and all the things that happened there: swords, Satella, Volcanica, Reid and Shaula; then another journey this time to the Pleiades Tower; then its exploration and the fight with Capella; finally it took some time to find all the Books of the Dead that Subaru had used. It was a lot of events, in short.

The crew was split into three groups: the first group consisted of women, and there were a lot of them, the second group consisted of men, and the last group consisted only of Subaru and Beatrice. Divine Dragon separated from all three and slept alone on top of Maya. The women (which included Emilia herself, Rem, Anastasia and her spirit, Shaula, Spica, and the Witches) settled into one of the larger rooms of Alcyone, using whatever they happen to find as a bedding. The men (which included Geuse, Reid, and Julius) slept in the dining room, they were relegated to sleeping on the chairs. Subaru and his favorite spirit had the premium accommodations – a little green spirit that followed him around managed to create a chair-like vines inside the Green Room, they were used as a support for the duo.

Coincidentally, the Green Room was where Emilia was headed to right now. She could not explain why she was going there. Maybe Subaru's presence just had a calming effect on her. Ever since the day he cried his eyes out on her lap, Emilia had started to seek him out during her more stressful days. That is to say, she did so at times when Subaru did not seek her out himself instead.

"Oh."

"Quiet, Subaru is still asleep. It is the calmest he's ever been, in fact."

Aside from Beatrice, who scolded Emilia, there was another person beside the Sage – her terrifying counterpart. That was the reason for the surprise of the Royal Candidate. Satella was currently softly caressing him like a mother would her little child (that he no longer was).

Lowering her voice so as not to wake her knight, Emilia asked:

"What's going on?"

"Ever since the last nightmare an hour ago, she arrived here and kept him sleeping soundly. Betty... can not deny the effectiveness of this. Even if it makes her envious, I suppose."

"Subaru… had nightmares?"

"Sigh, of course you wouldn't know, I suppose. Given how you barely pay attention to Subaru's hardships."

Subaru never talked to her about this. Still considering what he had already told to her during the party, it wasn't too surprising. Emilia promised herself to look into it. It seemed like she was already late. For some reason, she felt very uncomfortable, very guilty, as if she had let him down again. Suddenly, Emilia really wanted to be in Satella's place right now, to help her knight with his burdens. But at the same time, she hesitated to approach the three.

"Oh, Emilia-sama?"

"Rem? You are here too?"

The one addressed arrived in the room just after the half-elf.

"My apologies, Rem couldn't sleep. When you left, she decided to follow. Oh my, Subaru-kun is so cute! Rem have missed this."

The maid had a habit of arriving to his room early in the morning to watch him sleep for a bit. She developed it after the Wolgarm incident and witnessing him rest on Emilia-sama's legs. Before Emilia could object, Rem went behind the vine chair and began to pat his head gently. Something shifted inside Emilia again: why was Rem this bold while she felt like she did not belong?

"Sigh, it can't be helped, I suppose. Spirit, could you provide bedding for the maid and the half-elf?"

Following the little girl's orders, the green spirit extended the vine chair to fit Emilia and created another one behind the first for the oni maid.

"Me?"

"Stop pretending you don't want to join in, Emilia. It's not convincing. The spirit can give you a place to rest beside your knight, I suppose. I'm sure Betty's Subaru will enjoy it."

Faced with the outside pressure, Emilia gave in. With some hesitation, the half-elf Royal Candidate joined the four. As she did so, she gingerly took Subaru's hand.

"M-m-m, it's very warm…"

It was very comforting. The presence of her knight made Emilia feel incredibly relaxed. She made a pacing glance at his face. Rem was right: up close, Subaru's resting face was very cute. She wanted to get closer to him, but unfortunately Beatrice was in the way, so she had to compromise.

Ten minutes later, Shaula joined in as well – apparently, she had missed her Master. Finally, the five people surrounding the Sage eventually fell asleep.

And with that, the first day of the Sage's grand adventure came to an end (although all these events lasted until the early morning).

Chapter Text

"Ah, fuck, my head!"

Predictably, that was the first thought Subaru had upon waking up.

"Alright, you're alive and breathing, Natsuki Subaru, a simple headache never stopped you before, you've been through wa-a-ay worse, open your eyes already, you dimwit."

That was the second thought on the mind of Emilia's knight.

"I don't remember this ce-... Actually, that phrase had already worn out its welcome, where the fuck am I?"

Noticing that his hand was being held by someone to the right of him, he turned his head in that direction.

"Okay, there's Beako and Emilia-tan… Wait, why the fuck is Emilia sleeping with me?"

Then he noticed that someone was also hugging him from the left.

"Woah, what is she doing here? And why is everyone else sleeping soundly? I mean, it's literally Satella, guys!?"

Then he noticed someone at the back.

"Who are you..? Wait, I think I remember the name – Sha-u-la? Rem! She's here too! "

The scorpio and the maid in question were also in deep sleep at the back. If Subaru had paid enough attention, he would have noticed that the latter looked much too animated compared to the way she was before.

Piece by piece, he tried to recollect his memories from yesterday. He remembered being coaxed to drink at the party, and then… blur. It was just a bunch of images, completely disconnected from one another: The Scorpio girl almost bumping into him; The Red-haired Swordsman stuck on the shandolier; the Blue Dragon with the wacky accent; the Witches of Sin, but strangely beast-like; Satella blushing like a lovestruck teenager; Rem in her horned form with a murderous expression; Petelgeuse, but uncharacteristically melancholic; Emilia scolding him for something; Beako being spun around by him; Mimi on Garfiel's lap; Otto stumbling with some sort of booze in his hand; Archbishops – Louis, Sirius and Capella to be exact; an enormous explosion; and tables… wait, why tables, what's wrong with tables?

"So, how did I get into this situation, and more importantly, how the fuck am I supposed to get out?"

Now he noticed that he was nearly squished by all five, making it nearly impossible to get up. Gradually, some of the events of the past day began to come back to him, but his memories were too incoherent and disconnected.

"There should be some way to get out without waking them… Hm-m-m… Come on, Subaru, think. What would Kenshi's son do..?"

As he thought about it, he noticed a faint glow around his skin and then… his perspective suddenly changed.

"What? I am small now? Huh? Is this some Alice in Wonderland shit?"

At least it helped him to get out. Very carefully, he tippy-toed out of the room that he had woken up in.

-----

"What is this place? It looks so big…"

"My-my, Natsuki-kun, ya keep outdoin' yoself."

"Anastasia… Wait, what's up with my voice?"

"I'm not sure if ya've noticed, but ya're a cute little baby boy right now, Natsuki-kun. Very smushable. Be glad it's just me and not one of yo girlfriends. At least I have some self-control. Though I have to admit that yo bubbly face makes it very difficult."

"Oh, give me a moment."

Ignoring this… compliment, he tried to ponder how the hell this had happened and how to turn back. Thankfully, it didn't take long to figure out how to turn back, he just had to concentrate on the image of his original self. As for the reason for his new ability, he found zero clues in his fragmented memories.

"There. Now we can talk."

"I am here too, by the way."

Merchant's scarf separated from its owner, revealing the fox spirit.

"Oh, you, I think I vaguely remember you too... E-chid-na? Why do I remember her when I look at you..? Wait, there was something more about you… I don't remember."

"I had to take over for my partner yesterday. Since you solved that problem, it's no longer necessary. As for the Creator... she's also here."

"Creator?"

"Well, never mind that, we'll explain that later. Ya don't remember much about yesterday, huh, Natsuki-kun? Makes sense. Here, da last one. It will make you feel better."

She passed a strange-looking bottle to Subaru.

"What is it for?"

"Inebriation. But it could also be used for a hangover. I've saved da last dose specifically for ya, Natsuki-kun."

"Oh, thanks."

He finished the small vial with the remedy rather quickly. The merchant was right, it made him feel better.

"Ya woke up quite early. I'd wager it's been about five hours since we decided to stop yo shenanigans."

"Shenanigans? Ahm, alcohol, right... I remember I had some whiskey at our party."

"Not just some. Well, that's more than nothin'. A lot of stuff has happened since then. Ya being the main cause of pretty much all of them."

"Fuck… I see… Where are we?"

"Yo home. Ya know, ya should think about refurnishin' da place. After we walked around, we found there isn't even a single bed in here. And ya wanted to implement some kind of device… e-le-va-tor, I think ya called it."

"My… home?"

"Yes, Natsuki-kun, yo home. Da paperwork will take Mr. Mathers and Mr. Suwen some time, but I doubt anyone would disrupt yo claim to da tower and da surroundin' dunes."

"The tower? Where exactly are we?"

"Augria Sand Dunes, Pleiades Watchtower. It's far east of Lugunica. We thought it is supposedly da refuge of da Sage Shaula. Turns out it's yos."

"How did we get all the way here?"

"On da back of yo friend, Volcanica."

"That's the name of…"

"Da Divine Dragon, yes. Imagine our surprise, Natsuki-kun. But yo relationship with da Wi- I mean Satella was probably a main highlight of that day."

"So they are okay with her now? How?"

For once, Subaru did not know how this "Natsuki Subaru" had managed to do that.

"Arguably, yo victory over da Sword Saint was also quite spectacular, as well as yo subjugation of Gluttonies and Lust, but past-ya bangin' da most dangerous person in existence is probably higher on yo list of achievements."

"I've beaten Reinhard? And slayed Capella and the Trio?"

"Never mind the Satella. Although banging..? I mean, that kinda makes sense."

"First of all, not Reinhard, but Reid, and not in a physical confrontation – ya outdrank him and placed him on da shandoleer. Although yo casual takin' of da Dragon Sword from da young Astrea, probably counts as a moral victory against him."

"What? I stole Rein's sword?"

"It's in a dining room. Along with the Vollachian Yang Sword and… the Reality Slasher."

Foxchidna was honestly a bit afraid of those swords now.

"Second, Lye Batenkaitos and Roy Alphard were killed by Volcanica, while ya pacified Louis Arneb or, well... Spica, I think ya called her. She's in yo "crew" now, for whatever reason. At that point in yo journey, people just accepted whatever ya do, even adoptin' an Archbishop or bringin' one back from da dead. I'm not certain what ya have done with Capella, but ya have Lust, and she's gone. I think ya did somethin' with ya Authorities, though I do not understand what."

"And overpowered the Witch Cult? In one night? How?"

"Oh, right, a lot of people now know that ya are da Sage and of yo relationship with the Witches of Sin. By da way, ya also resurrected them."

Needless to say, it was hard to believe. Never mind the Sage bit, everything else was more surprising. Still, despite the absurdity of the recount, he accepted it. Anastasia's words seemed to be true. Subaru saw no point in lying about something so completely outlandish like that. She had not even tried to claim any part in those achievements. The fact that Satella was with him and that did not cause a mass panic also sorta proved her words. His disconnected memories began to coalesce into a single, cohesive (albeit still fragmented and really fucking weird) picture.

"So what do we do now?"

"Now? Ya planned to return to Priestella and then make an ultimatum to da Council of Elders."

"What?"

"It was a part of your plan to "Unfuck da World". Ya should still have yo note in one of yo pockets. Ya made it while we were searchin' for da books for ya."

-----

After looking through his pockets, he finally found it. It was written on a crumpled piece of paper in a barely distinguishable kanji, but he could still make it out:

"Unfuck the World!

I am tired of this bullshit universe, so here's how I am going to fix it (writing this just in case I forget):

Step 1: Visit an old place – Done! Got some cool new clothes and Reality Slasher out of it. And like two crazy op Authorities on top of that (three, if you count Envy 2.0)!

Step 2: Teach these savages some modern technology – In progress. Not sure how to handle it yet. Already working on it with Candidates. Might have to start a popular movement or even a fucking revolution if the nobles gonna get antsy. The Council are dicks, as are the most of the upper nobility. Fuck them. I say we murder them if they get in the way.

Step 3: Kill the Witch Cult – Nearly done. Others are already taken care of. Where the hell is Pride? Also, need to get to Pandora and beat the shit out of her for messing with Emilia-tan, maybe she has some clues about Pride… Also, find what I left behind the Seal 2 and fix the Emilia's Village problem.

Step 4: Export the revolution – In the near future. Other countries suck ass too, so I have to bulldoze my way through them as well. Vollachia is first, since there's a guy there, with two fancy swords that I want. Then Kararagi (fucking slavers operate there, disgusting!). Then Gusteko (too cold).

Step 5: Fix Tella-tan's conundrum – At some point. Honestly I don't know what to do here. Everyone else has just kinda accepted that she's with me now and that I'll handle it, but how? Maybe I can pull all the Envy out of her? It might be kinda dangerous. I feel very odd when I use "Jealous Desire". Maybe there is some other way?

Step 6: Fix the bloody tower – Eventually. Why the fuck past-me forgot to make the elevator?! Flugel, you are a fucking dick! Never mind all your other bullshit, this is fucking ridiculous! You made like two force-fields, populated the place with a half of the world's witchbeasts, added a med-room, a library, three fuckin' trial rooms, and more secret rooms than necessary, but no elevator? What the fuck!? Alright, I'm done. I'm calm, I'm not mad. Seriously, fuck you, past-me, you're the worst! Redesign this shit with some proper amenities – water supply, toilet, kitchen, garden, air conditioning, garbage shoot – all the jazz. Oh, and an observatory. Pretty sure I can make like a simple telescope or something.

And that's it! Do that and this bullshit world, that wants to kill me at every corner, will be fixed. Hopefully."

-----

"Alright. This is… insane."

"No shit, Natsuki-kun... Sorry, that was mean, it was kinda my fault."

"No, it is mine, Anastasia, I organized the party and spent time convincing others to goad him to drink. I've learned my lesson."

"To be fair, I was goin' to do somethin' similar. So, no biggie, 'chidna. I'll take da responsibility."

"What's done is done, Shortstack, more importantly we have to continue on. Ya don't just start a fight, get a hit in, and run away."

Two hours later, the others woke up and joined the Sage. Subaru had to be given a quick summary of the events, of course. At the moment, they were right outside the main gate, ready to depart.

"Correct. Even if the circumstances of this are not ideal, you've already started a movement."

"You looked hesitant before, Dona…"

"I've reconsidered, wench. This may be even more interesting than what we had in store. Hence, this is satisfactory."

"Echidna-san and Satella-san being on the same note? Damn, Master has really outdone himself."

"Ehem, but what are we going to do about Satella-sama's presence, however?"

"I dunno, Julius. I guess if Tella is with us, she might cause the mass panic."

"I have a way, love. It's not a problem."

"There's also the Witch Factor of Wrath, Master. I heard that you captured Sirius Romanee-Conti."

"By the way, what's up with that, Geuse? Subaru told me, she seemed re-e-ealy weird."

"It's… an old story, Emilia."

"You were able to take the Witch Factors without killing the previous owners somehow. Maybe you can do that, Subaru-kun."

Suddenly, the time stopped:

"It's Envy. You took the part of her- us."

After Satella clarified this, the time resumed.

"I see. Then I'll have to use it again."

"Sigh, we can now finally depart this accursed place. Betty will be atop her contractor, I suppose."

"Mhm, me as well, I will be with Beako."

"Beatrice! Not Beako, I suppose!"

"Come on, can I call you that too?"

"You're not Betty's contractor. You can call Bubby however you want, but do not disrespect Betty, in fact!"

Emilia looked sad at the spirit's cold rejection.

"Rem wants to ride Subaru-kun too."

"Me as well."

"Same. I want to ride Master too."

"Wording… girls… wording…"

"I'm pretty sure that was on purpose, Natsuki-kun."

The giggling of all three was a confirmation of the merchant's words. Only Emilia looked confused.

"Truth be told, I was kinda tempted after hearin' about da six hours."

"Anastasia-sama?"

"What, Julius? Girl can dream. Unless ya say ya can do eight?"

"Ehm…"

"Oh no, Purplehead is gonna experience a death by snu-snu! Lucky guy."

"Okay, where did you learn that reference?"

"I learned it from you, Master!"

He sighed. Past-him was a terrible parent, as it turns out.

"W-we will fly on Volcanica."

"But I wanted to be with Baru!"

"Yes, I wanted to travel on Subarun as we-e-ell."

"Calm down, you two, ha-a-a… We won't separate anyway, ha-a-a…"

"I found it rather odd that you want to ride on Volcanica, Sekhmet. I would've held a grudge."

"I mean you're not mad at Tella Tella though, are you, Ner Ner?"

"No, but this is different!"

"'Tis is rather curious indeed, Minerva. Given we… had our differences before… The apology is mine. Our scuffle was uncalled-for."

"It's fine, Volcanica, ha-a-a… I am not bothered, ha-a-a… If anything, being dead was rather peaceful, ha-a-a…"

"I will join you as well."

"Crybaby isn't clinging to Master? The world has really flipped on its head!"

"I'm not clingy, nor do I cry that much, Shaula!"

"Su-u-ure…"

The spirit did not sound very convincing.

"Same with us three. We'll mount da Divine Dragon."

The merchant princess who said that pointed at her knight and her spirit.

"Otherwise, I won't get that innuendo out of my head."

The last sentence was barely audible.

"Dona, will you join us?"

"But of course."

"Alright, I'd be with Volc, Flugel. Fly safe."

"Okay, we managed to split up without any problems. Wait, what about you?"

"Uau!"

The former Gluttony rushed towards him. Even with her limited vocabulary, the answer was rather obvious.

"Don't forget da drinks, Natsuki-kun."

"Is that really necessary?"

"YES!"

A resounding yes was the answer of the majority of Sage's companions. Subaru was rather surprised just how much they all agreed.

"But I won't drink…"

"Nah, we need da drunk ya back, Natsuki-kun. How else are we gonna convince da Council of Elders?"

"It seems that for Betty's Subaru, a glass of whiskey is a powerful buff, I suppose. It increases your effectiveness tenfold."

"Sigh, fine. But I will not drink that much. Just a bit to loosen my tongue. Then you, Anastasia, will get me one of those remedies you have."

Of course, no one else believed that it would be just one glass. Nor did the merchant tell him that Subaru's shenanigans had cost her the entire supply of sobriety potions that she had brought to Priestella, and that she couldn't provide them even if she wanted to.

Before long, Emilia's knight transformed into his already familiar draconic form.

"Damn, that's really cool. I always wanted to be a dragon, when I was a kid."

"Yeah, Subaru, we know."

Emilia remembered how excited he looked the previous time. In truth, she thought that it was somewhat cute. He had seemed genuinely happy back then.

"Subaru's tastes are truly something else, I suppose."

"Subaru-kun is rather weird. But in a good way."

"I'm not weird. I am about as normal as one can be back home! I swear!"

With that, he took off. As the Pleiades Watchtower left the sight of the Subaru's associates, this chapter of the Sage's adventure came to a close.

-----

On some isolated farm a little while later:

"Mommy! Daddy!"

"What is it, dear?"

"I was back at the coup, setting the chicks free, when I saw something so co-o-ol!"

"What did you see, honey?"

"It was a hu-u-uge flying dragon! This big!"

The little girl dramatically spread her tiny hands.

"That doesn't look that big."

"Stupid Daddy! Stupid! It was high in the sky!"

"Oh, then it must be very big, honey."

"Very, very big!"

"Sorry, dear, I read her a fairy tale about the Divine Dragon last night before she went to sleep. It might be a reason for her wild imagination."

"It was real, Daddy!"

"Of course it was. What did it look like?"

"Very big and blue, with huge wings and a lo-o-ong tail!"

"Blue? Huh… Robert, do you think..?"

"Nah, no way, Elaila."

"There was also another one, just as huge! But black! They flew together."

"Two? Alright, maybe you are right, Robert. Lily, don't forget to wash your hands, breakfast is ready."

"Sure, Mommy!"

The daughter of this simple couple quickly rushed out of the house.

"So, dear, when is your mother Vanessa coming back from the big city? These appas have been a pain in the ass to collect."

Chapter Text

"Fucking hell, now I have to prove to them that I'm not all talk."

The flight back to Priestella was rather uneventful. Flying was rather easy, as Subaru's draconic body was pretty much made for it: all he had to do was to follow Volcanica, who in turn was piloted by Reid. Even for a dumbass like him, it was impossible to screw up, unless he decided to do a barrel roll and throw off his passengers in process for whatever reason, not that he ever wanted to do that. There was only one issue: it was honestly a bit boring, the bird's eye view (or maybe dragon's eye view would be more correct phrasing?) was nice, of course, but all he did was flap his wings from time to time and that was it. Thus in order to pass the time, Subaru (in the form of the great black dragon) decided to spend this time to collect his thoughts.

"Well, the drunk me had some good ideas and honestly, it's awesome that I somehow convinced everyone on my side… Fuck, it's still really bloody stupid! I'd rather fight the White Whale or the Archbishops again than try to wrangle this entire society."

Predictably, he recalled the events of the previous day.

"What a mess. I literally scrambled the whole program on the fly! "Unfuck the World", what a load of horseshit!"

Well, recalling wasn't exactly the right way to describe it. More like remembering his own stupidity and swearing like a sailor.

"You can salvage it, Subaru, let's make a plan that would work. First, let's figure out the part about technological enlightenment of this place. Review the projects, organize supply chains, make contracts with Anastasia, consult with Otto and Roswaal about the paperwork and finances, establish a plan to reform Lugunica, and find a balance between all the Royal Candidates to make sure I have their support. Ugh, it's back to politics again. At least I have some experience now…"

It was not the first time he had to do politics all on his own – he brokered the triple alliance between Crush, Anastasia, and Emilia in order to vanquish the White Whale and the now-alive Petelgeuse.

"Still, it's like the next order of magnitude – I have to account for the interests of all the Royal Candidates first, including Emilia-tan. Crusch wants a strong independent Lugunica: implementing a standing army instead of commoner levies and knights will probably work, though I'm not sure how exactly it would help against someone like Reinhard. Felt wants to dismantle the old order and help the common folk: we need a proper suffrage, education, medicine, maybe I need to create a first constitution. Don't remember if there is one already in here or not. Obviously, I'll have to include demi-humans of all kinds in all this, that's Emilia's program, but that alone probably won't be enough. We need to push for some fairer laws for them. It will take time, but eventually that rift should begin to heal. And Priscilla… I honestly don't know why she agreed. I guess if I put myself in her place, I'd probably think it all just sounds very interesting… Yes, that's it! She just needs to be sufficiently entertained by all the changes. So she's the easiest one to placate, at least in the beginning. Well, there's "the whole world is working in my favor" thing, but I think I can handle her obnoxious personality. Finally, Anastasia... hmm… of course cooperation with Hoshin Company is necessary to push the innovations out, at the same time giving her too much power to her is also bad. I am just a highschool drop out, not an economist, so I can't manage the treasury of the entire state, but… Maybe if we put some representatives of the merchant class in power, it would work, but how... Ugh, what a hassle!"

Since he was one of the people who absolutely had to accompany his lady to various meetings, Emilia's knight already had decent grasp on Lugunica's political situation. Still, wrangling it all of this seemed like a monumental task to the Sage.

"Five Royal Candidates, all with opposing interests, and I'm in the middle. Fuck. Well, could be way worse. At least I am not marrying them all! Actually, let's stop that line of thought, Felt isn't even legal yet, never mind the rest."

In another world Natsuki Subaru woke up from the sudden coughing fit. After lazily closing the window of the royal chambers, he returned back to his lovely Emilia. The resting time of the greatest ruler of the Kingdom of Lugunica and his first wife continued on.

"Wait, I know! The parliamentary system! That kills all the birds with just one stone! Add some nobles, a few big merchants, some common folk, a couple of demi-human leaders, and we're all set. Each faction pushes their own agenda, and if I can get the balance of power right, I can make sure everyone's interests are satisfied. Come to think of it, we already have something resembling political parties. I guess I can make a pseudo-republic for the time being."

He decided not to delve in into the possibility of becoming the leader of the said republic. For now, he was only concerned with fulfilling his promises.

The Council of Elders and all the entrenched conservative nobility were obviously a problem as well. Intimidation or outright revolt against the Elders was an option, but for all the bitterness that he still harbored toward the members, he understood that they were decently capable people. He would rather have them on their side. Hence, the revolution was his final option, diplomacy would have to be his primary way of approaching this. Maybe set them up in charge of the executive branch? As for the nobles: making use of influence of Mathers, Astrea and Karsten families, as well as Priscilla's supporters, seemed to be the best course of action.

And of course there were also the "inventions" that he so generously shared with everyone. According to Anastasia, who recorded pretty much everything he said, it was the very basics: transmission gears, primitive engines, gunpowder, medicine. Pretty much everything that could be made in the late medieval/early renaissance period that this world was currently in. He wagered that it would take about a decade roughly before these became a normal thing, and then after that he should consider brainstorming things like advanced math, physics, chemistry, electrodynamics, trains, planes et cetera. For a high school dropout, Subaru was actually quite knowledgeable – he was one of the top students before he stopped attending. So, while he had no idea how to make something really complex, like the phone he arrived with, for example, he knew concepts that he could go over with various scholarly people, not that there were many of them in here. In truth, he berated himself a little for not doing this before, as it could've made him famous and have improved Emilia's standing by proxy.

That was the Sage's thought process as he was creating the plan to reshape the Kingdom of Lugunica from the ground up.

-----

Emilia was solving a conundrum. The events of the past day filled her with anxiety and urgency. At this point, she had already figured out her feelings for Subaru. She wasn't fully certain if her thought process was completely correct or what exactly she should do next, but the half-elf thought that she loved him back. It took her a while to realize that. In truth, it was reeealy difficult – her feelings for him were very different from those that she had for Puck, Geuse or Mother Fortuna, but they were still very strong. It's just that Emilia did not associate the concept of loving someone differently from how she loved her foster parents before. Of course, this did not mean that she did not care for her knight, of course. From their first meeting, she realized that he was unlike anyone else, that she could trust him implicitly. She owned everything she had to Subaru, she relied on him and wanted to be with him. Subaru was a wonderful knight, a good friend and even something more to the half-elf. He made her reeealy happy. She did not know if this was enough to be called "love", but for now, Emilia decided to be satisfied with this answer. She loved Subaru. More than everything.

At the same time, Emilia felt guilty – she thought that the things that she did for him were insurmountably small compared to what Subaru did for her every day. That unlike the other people who cared for him, she was only receiving his love, not returning it back. Oddly enough, the catalyst that made her understand this, as well as figure out the whole "love" thing, were Rem and Satella – both of whom adored Subaru, helped him, supported him (although she still did not know what the latter did, as Subaru mercilessly vetoed her inquiries). And this filled her with odd feelings – feelings of inadequacy and even possessiveness. These feelings urged her to act. Emilia felt that he was becoming more and more distant from her with each passing moment – something that she did not like. What was left now was to actually give Subaru an answer, but finding an opportunity to do so was difficult.

So, in short, Emilia decided that she had to stop dilly-dallying around and take the reins of their relationship for the first time. Fortunately, they will get some time alone after Subaru will make a deal with the Council of Elders.

-----

The other people that the Sage carried on his back were pondering things as well:

Beatrice was thinking about the future. The current situation was interesting, to say the least. The spirit predicted that her contractor, who was already quite famous, would soon become the most famous (or infamous, if things went wrong) person in the world. And that created all kinds of issues. Betty's Subaru was already under a lot of pressure, but now it will be insurmountable. And the stress of organizing such a massive change in the society of Lugunica, nay, the whole known world, was beyond the most. The Great Spirit of Yin had to be vigilant, otherwise her favorite person might crack either from pressure from without or from within.

Rem was simply happy. Subaru-kun took her rather selfish words to heart and became the true hero that she had always pictured him to be. That was good enough for the oni maid. Knowing that there was a piece reserved just for her was also quite sweet. Of course, she would like to have all of his attention, but that would be far too selfish – Subaru's heart simply had too much love to be monopolized by a single person. And there were plenty of things to catch up on after her "nap" – the massive change in the relationship between Subaru-kun and Lady Beatrice being just one example.

Shaula's thoughts could be described in two words – joyful excitement. She wasn't the smartest person out there, but she believed she had valid reasons to be ecstatic: her wonderful Master was back in action and was about to embark on the greatest Hero's Journey this world had ever known. It would even top his first adventure in this place, she was sure of it!

Echidna was equally excited, albeit for different reasons. Few people knew this, but she adored the Sage, his otherworldly nature and the sheer unpredictability of his personality more specifically. It wasn't even about Return by Death and the infinite opportunities it provided, rather it was just that his thought process was so inexplicable, paradoxically he was both incredibly selfish and incredibly selfless at the same time, very Greedy indeed, truly the mind of someone more twisted than all the Witches combined. Picking through his head was honestly incredibly enjoyable. And of course there was his origin reality. Back then, she only had a surface level dip into its nature in order to create the first trial of the Sanctuary, but even so, it fascinated her beyond all belief. She had been a bit grumpy before, yes, but now she waited with bated breath for the boy's next action.

Finally, there was Satella. Her thoughts could be summed up in just one word – love. Love had ultimately been the reason for all of the half-elf's actions, from the beginning four hundred years ago until the end, i.e. this very moment. It was why she was still here, because in the end, Subaru wasn't the only one who was affected by her presence – same was true in reverse. The longer she was at his side, the more both she and Envy did not want to let go. As soon as the two were separated for any reason and for any length of time, the nastier part of her began to rumble violently inside her mind, demanding to get him back, and that was bad as Satella's mind was becoming more and more unstable without him. Her lover was doing so well right now and the last thing Satella wanted was to become a problem, an obstacle. And of course she did not want to be the reason for yet another of his deaths. It was selfish, but she would rather make him live forever from this point on. No matter what.

-----

"Dear friends, we art nearly there. Do thee seeth?"

"Ah, yup. That's Priestella."

"Ehm, Volc, so how do you land properly?"

"Halt thy forward speed with thy wings, then descend ever gently by slowing thy flaps. Maketh sure not to tilt for the safety of thy charges, friend."

"Don't worry Subaru. Betty will halt the fall in case of an emergency."

It wasn't the first time she had to do that. On the previous flight, Subaru had almost face-planted them into the walls of the Royal Palace. Thankfully, Murak hadn't been needed that time, as they had avoided the collision.

"Uh, Tella. About that spell you're gonna to hide yourself with... We'll have witnesses."

"Don't worry, dear..."

With that she disappeared from sight.

"...I'll always be close by, hiding in your shadows."

"Woah, that's kinda neat."

He felt as her presence gently enveloping him like an invisible blanket.

"Where did she go Subaru? I can not perceive her, in fact!"

"She's like right next to me, Beako, but intangible. I can vaguely feel her. Do you, people?"

Echidna was quick to clarify:

"No, this incantation is the exclusive to you and the whore. The two of you developed it during our first journey..."

"You used it to bang without being noticed, Master. Reid, Farsale and Echidna-san were very annoyed prior to that."

"Oh."

Subaru could vaguely feel the embarrassment coming from her lover. Not that he was any different.

"This spell separates a tiny piece of the world that hides me in it. Only two of us will remain connected. I can make others of your choice to be aware of me as well, if you wish."

"No need, I think that's fine. But damn, that's incredibly useful. Tella-tan, can you teach it to me and Beako?"

"In our spare time, of course, dear. But we'll be too busy during the next few days."

Of course, Satella had reasons to agree. Very important and non-lewd reasons, yes.

"Cool, thanks. Is it okay if you stay like this for a bit? Yeah? Okay, now let's try the landing."

-----

It wasn't all too difficult as it turned out. Canceling the horizontal speed was simple, just position the wings against the motion. Finding the exact tempo of lapping the wings to ensure a slow descent took a bit longer, but after following Divine Dragon's example, he found the right pace.

"Priestella HQ, Priestella HQ, over. "Sage Actual" to Priestella HQ, we are entering sector to Sector A4, over! Attention on board, maggots! We are redeploying to Priestella, everyone get your chutes ready! Don't cower, you maggots! Follow Sergeant Shaula's lead and you'll return safely to your brides! Ah, I love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like… victory."

-----

Down below, people gathered around when they noticed the two flying beasts in the sky. Among them was the current Sword Saint, Reinhard van Astrea, who was predictably the first to spot the arrival (thanks to his many Divine Protections). He was also the one who kept the onlookers from panicking – yesterday Volcanica had arrived late at night, so it was obvious that many were unaware of his previous visit. Of course, he had also already figured out that the black beast was Subaru after connecting to his mind with the Divine Protection of Telepathy. With him were the Gorgeous Tiger, the Sword Demon, the Sun Princess, and Otto (who unfortunately didn't have a cool nickname).

"Reinhard-san, are you certain this is Subaru?"

"Absolutely."

"Now Captain has an awesome transformation too, and it's even cooler than mine. What 'bout ya, Brotto, when are ya gonna get yo animal form?"

"Urgh, Garfiel, I can't shape-shift, I'm not demi-human and not… whatever Natsuki-san is."

"Ya think he's like actually a Dragon? I mean, remember when he was cursed by Capella?"

"Indeed. The Cursed Dragon Blood had strange effects on Subaru-dono. Compared to Lady Crusch, he regrew his leg with that blood. Perhaps he is a dragonkin."

"Yeah, maybe he is, ya might be right, Sword Demon."

"Hmm, that's a curious thought, Grandfather. It could explain some of Subaru's oddities."

"Dragonkin?"

"I've read in da books that some Dragons made humanoid children called Dragonkin. They are like really strong – on par with elves and onis in raw power. Destined to do big things."

"Don't be stupid, commoners. Dragonkin are beings of incredible physical and magical strength. Does your Sage look like one?"

"Yeah, fair point, Lady Priscilla. No need to spread unproven rumors."

"Fine, Brotto, but mark my words Captain is gonna get even more awesome."

"That I don't doubt."

-----

Within minutes, Dragonbaru and Volcanica landed gently on the pavement near the City Hall – the same place where Sage's chaotic, drunken journey began. After making sure everyone had disembarked, Emilia's knight transformed back into his familiar human shape, fascinating onlookers in the process.

"It's a Hero of Priestella!"

"We love you, Lolimancer!"

"Urgh, I wish the people would come up with a better name. I'd rather be known for something else."

"Nah, Captain that one's definitely gonna stick. So, how things goin' – ya've kicked some ass?"

"Apparently. Although I don't remember most of it."

"Sounds about right, Natsuki-san. I'll have to officially hand over the title of the camp's drunkard to you now."

"Yeah, who would've thought."

"Oh, hello! You are Baru's new friends, right? Are you good people?"

The little Witch of Pride quickly returned to her old habits of judging.

"Yeah, they're good, Typh. For the most part."

"Let me che-… Oh, right, I forgot I can't punish the bad guys anymore. Well, I'll take your word for it, Baru."

"Ah, so Priestella has not changed much in four centuries? I see."

"I don't know, Dona, haaa... some buildings seem new, haaa…"

"Damn the Witch Cult really did a number on this place. It pisses me off. Where's the hospital, let me help out."

"Calm down. Ner Ner, you can not punch peeeople freely anymore."

"Ah, yeah… Of course… Urgh, that's annoying!"

"T-there should be enough he-healers here anyway, Mi-Minerva."

"Ehm, Subaru, who are these… women?"

The knight of Anastasia answered the Sword Saint's question on Suabru's behalf:

"That's complicated, Reinhard. Subaru's abilities were able to summon, some of his "old friends", bar the ones that we met yesterday."

Julius still kept his caution whilst dealing with the Witches of Sin. Sure, they possessed no Authorities, but that didn't mean they were exactly powerless.

"Alright, before I go on another drunken rampage, I have a lot to do. Anastasia, Emilia-tan we're gonna have a talk tête-à-tête. Gather the other Royal Candidates. I have a very big idea I want to go over with all of you."

"Tête-à-tête?"

"Or one-on-one, Emilia-tan. Without anyone else. Well, five-on-one, come to think of it."

"Another one of yo great reforms, Natsuki-kun? Can't wait."

"Yep, but first things first, I have to meet Crusch."

"Have you found a way to deal with Crusch-sama's condition, Subaru-dono?"

"Sorta. I'm not yet sure."

-----

"Hello there, Subaru-kyun. Was the rest of the yesterday's party at the Pleiades Watchtower fyun? Crusch-sama and Ferri had to retire early."

"Honestly, I barely remember it. The others had to spend about an hour describing the whole thing."

"Hehe, I'm surprised you even managed to wake up at all. Ferri-chan has never seen anyone drink so much byooze."

"True, I'm sure yesterday's event will be written in legends, Subaru-sama. Probably by that Songstress Liliana."

"Well, it could be worse. Remembered by my alcoholism or by all the children that I manage to attract. Yeah, the first one is better, plus you can spin it like a "Drunken Master" sorta thing."

"Dryunken Master? Subaru-kyun, drinking doesn't make you better at anything."

"Ah, another cultural difference. In any case, Crusch, I've managed to deal with Capella."

"That bitch. Good ryiddance."

Felix hissed loudly upon the mention of the Archbishop of Lust. The knight honestly looked really frightening, especially to Subaru, who knew what kind of torture the healer could inflict.

"Good, then both of us have been avenged. Unfortunately, it does not seem to have solved my problem by itself like it did with Gluttony."

"About that, I took the Witch Factor, but I'm not sure if I can reverse it. As you can see…"

Subaru revealed his formerly cursed arm and leg.

"…The blood is completely purged from my system. Beako told me that this happened when I used my ability. So I might be able to absorb it in again."

"Subaru-sama, you were hurt when you tried it the first time…"

"Do it!"

"Ferris!"

"Crusch-sama, I hate to see you like this!"

"But Subaru is more valuable than me right now!"

"You are more vyaluable to Ferri!"

"Listen, Lady Crusch, I can handle it. I don't mind a little pain."

He was lying, of course. Even though he had died more than anyone else, he had not become numb to pain or loss. But he was willing to push through it.

"Sigh, alright. Do what you can."

It worked. The process was slow and incredibly painful for the Sage, but he did it eventually. Due to the disparity between the amount of cursed dragon blood Crusch lost each time and the amount he received, he had to make six trips. They have made the routine: he would touch Crusch, draw blood until he was in a state of shock and could not move, then he would be carried outside, then he would transform into a Dragon (as it turned out, only that transformation worked, it may have something to do with Volcanica's own dragon blood that he copied), then he would rest for about ten to twenty minutes, transform back, then go back to Crusch's quarters again and repeat. Needless to say, everyone but Subaru himself hated this, even Felix, especially those close to the Sage. Hoping to do something to help, Emilia volunteered to do the carrying part, while Beatrice, Rem, Garfiel and Felix used a rather excessive amount of mana to stabilize him each time. Satella also pitched in – by wrapping her own miasma around him, just like she had yesterday (back then it had helped him sober up), she helped him recover more quickly as well.

"And we're done here. Phew. Took a while."

"I love you. You are so… you."

"Dunderhead! Stop making me worry! I'm reeealy glad it's over..."

"Betty agrees with the half-elf."

"Ferri is so sorry… You have got so hurt, Subaru-kyun..."

"My hero! Rem was so scared."

"Sigh, Barusu. Always the troublesome one."

"Captain, you did it!"

"Urgh, Natsuki-san, I need a drink after witnessing this. You've brought some, right?"

There were many more congratulations. Some were laced with guilt, and some with reprimands for his recklessness, but everyone involved recognized the heroic deed of the Emilia's knight. Needless to say, he received a lot of hugs afterward.

For Subaru himself, it wasn't too big of deal – he knew what he was getting himself into, since he had ingested the cursed blood before. Besides, on the self-made pain scale, this wasn't the highest: above losing a limb, for sure, but lower than being slowly frozen solid or eaten alive. Regardless, after crossing "saving Crusch" off his to-do list for the day, Subaru moved on to the next item.

-----

"Petelgeuse, my love, you are back. I'm sorry I was pushy, and thank you for forgiving me."

"You're wrong. I'm not him."

"Wrong? I still feel you in this body."

"You "feel" Sloth, not the "actual him". "Actual him" is alive and well now."

"Spirit you mean?"

"Well, yeah."

"You misunderstand. Petelgeuse is Sloth, and Sloth is Petelgeuse. That is, you are. The spirit is just a shell for Petelgeuse."

"No, you are wrong. Just like Emilia is not a shell for Satella. The Sloth is mine and mine alone. But I'm not here to speculate on the mechanics of the Witch Factors, I'm here to take Wrath."

"You said you'd bring more of that drink… whiskey?"

"Yeah, not sharing, as it turns out my Tower supply isn't infinite, we only have eight more crates and three kegs. At my rate it will only last me like a week or two. I have another way."

In an instant, his Envy manifested itself, claiming yet another Authority. The clash of wills ended rather quickly, as Subaru was both sober and highly focused on the action, while Sirius was barely cautious thanks to the magical restraints she was bound with. After shrugging off the feeling of satisfaction and the desire for more that came from using his ability, Subaru left the now unconscious Archbishop of Wrath.

-----

Next on the list was helping the victims of the Witch Cult attack, more specifically the victims of the Archbishop of Lust. Quite many of them were transformed into giant flies. While demi-beasts were all put down, the unfortunate preys of Capella's crazed onslaught were non-hostile, and hence were frozen solid by Emilia until the solution to their problem could be found.

"And here we are. Hm, I was right, no need to make a Wuxi Finger to activate it."

"Meatbag!"

"Oh, hey. Do you know how to fix this, Capella? This soul is still is twisted by your Lust."

He pointed to the giant fly whose soul he had pulled into the Hall of Memories.

"Will that make you free me any faster, meatbag?"

"I guess it would earn you some points. That being said, I won't let you go until I'm done with the rest of the Witch Cult."

"Sigh, it's Authority. You can counteract it with the effort of another one."

"Oh, like that?"

He tried various in quick succession. Sloth did nothing, Greed was the same, though he managed to connect with the no doubt frightened citizen of Priestella, Wrath was still asleep, Lust only affected himself, and he refused to activate Envy. Finally, when he activated Gluttony, he made progress. After using it, he literally ate the outer layer of this person's soul that was made by Capella's Lust, thus returning it to its original state.

"Oh, thank you! I was so scared! Thank you so much! Thank you! Thank you!"

"Woah, slow down! We're not back yet."

"My family…"

"Yeah, don't worry, I think I got this. I'll free everyone soon. Star eating, phase two."

One by one, he freed the victims from their torment. Like before, he had to first pull the soul into the Hall of Memories, then help each citizen to regain "their own self" (basically returning their soul back to its original form), then guide the soul back into the body, which would reshape itself into something between a human (or a demi-human) and a fly. It wasn't perfect, but even that satisfied the victims and their families. It was a long and exhausting job, but at least he was fed whenever he demanded it. The side effect of making him incredibly hungry slowed down the process so much that it took a quarter of the day to finish.

-----

The last item on his schedule for today was to meet with the Royal Candidates.

"And that's it. Sounds intuitive, is it not?"

"No, Subaru. It doesn't sound simple at all!"

"Really?"

"I agree with Lady Emilia here. Damn, Natsuki-kun, ya really thought this through…"

A piece of wood that was fashioned for the impromptu blackboard was covered with notations. It had the internal structure of the new government, suggested reforms, the project of the first constitution, checks and balances, proposed nominations for some positions, and even some potential shortcomings of the new system.

"Seriously, Subaru. When did you have time to think about all of this?"

"While I was flying back."

"Ya did all of this while flying back?! Hoshin's dirty bollocks, Natsuki-kun, the fuck is wrong with ya?!"

"Yeah, whatever Anastasia just said! You can not come up with that in just a half an hour!"

"I mean it's not just today, I was with you quite a bit while you were studying politics, Emilia-tan. I know the current political structure of Lugunica quite well. I've learned it so I'll never embarrass myself in public like before. Well, unless people would call you names, Emilia-tan."

"Still, Subaru-sama. You've basically created your own Candidate program. It seems like you've put more thought into it than some of us."

Crusch decided not to mention which of the five she was talking about so as not to cause unnecessary friction.

"Damn, did I go too far in describing the internal structure?"

To Subaru, it did not look complicated at all. It was basically a classic Presidential Democracy with a few tweaks intended to make a smooth transition from the fantasy-monarchy that Lugunica had at the moment.

"Subaru-sama, this is massive. You intend to reshape the entire political structure of the kingdom from the ground up. And it's so different... Like the closest place I can think of that operates similarly is…"

"Kararagi. They say we elect our leaders back home. But it's not like that there, not really. Maybe in the Hoshin's time. In reality, those who make the most money just buy the seat in the big council and that's it. So yeah, very different."

"What about you then?"

"I have different sights. Staking my claim here makes me different from others."

"This looks cool, Nii-chan. So you can just elect a bunch of folk to this parliament, and they decide among themselves which laws to implement?"

"Yeah, roughly like that, Felt."

"And what is this President thing?"

"Well, that's the person who's supposed to unite the legislative and executive branches of government. The position is very important. Like a king, but you can't just do whatever you want."

"Would you be president, Subaru?"

"Ahm, Emilia-tan?"

"What's wrong?"

"Eh, I haven't thought about the proper candidate, Emilia-tan… Would people even chose me? I mean just look at me..."

"Alright, enough, with this self-flagellation, Natsuki-kun. None of us five should be eligible. Otherwise, it'll be just like before. Ya're the only one who can keep the balance between the five of us."

"Yeah, I think you'd be great!"

"I agree with Nee-chan and Anastasia."

"I agree as long as others do, Subaru-sama."

"…"

"Priscilla, you were silent all the whole time. Do you want Nii-chan to be at the center of this?"

"'Tis satisfactory. The world will fit my design, thanks to you, commoner. I approve."

"Woah, even Priscilla agreed!"

"What was that, half-elf? Do you consider mineself disagreeable?"

"I mean I'm surprised too. Normally you are just a big, lousy bitch, but now when Nii-chan was talking, you were dead quiet."

"I'm not blind enough not to see the benefits of this. Besides, do not think that this new project will let you do whatever you want, slum rat."

"I don't, but I'm going to make sure you don't either."

"Hoho, go ahead. It does not change my decision."

"Well, there's one more thing I have to say."

"What is it, Subaru?"

"I'm going to the Council sober."

"Natsuki-kun!"

"Subaru? Didn't we agree that it would be better for you to have at least one glass before confronting them?"

"Yeah, no offense, Natsuki-kun, but we need confident ya back. Normal-ya is quite a pushover."

"That's mean, you two. Let the Nii-chan do it his own way."

"But Subaruuu…"

"It's not about confidence. No one else, but the party attendants from yesterday would take drunk me seriously!"

For once, Emilia's puppy eyes did not work on her knight.

"I agree with Felt-sama and Subaru-sama. I trust your judgment."

"And you, Priscilla?"

"'Tis irrelevant. Regardless of your disposition, they would accept it. The world works in my favor. And your success would work in my favor, hence meaning you can not lose, as long as it benefits me."

"Sorry, you two, Priscilla abstained, so it's three vs. two. I win."

"Alright, but the blame will be on you, Natsuki-kun."

And so, this unofficial alliance between the Sage and the Royal Candidates in order to bring democracy to Lugunica was signed.

Chapter Text

"You can do this. You can do this. You can do this! You…"

She sighed. A shiver ran down her spine as her anxiety overwhelmed her. Will he have time? He was re-e-e-ally busy today. What would she say? What will they do if he agrees? She had not planned anything, had not found a decent spot, had not made any reservations, had not found any presents to give, she did not even have any spare money! Although, she could secretly ask Roswaal for the last bit.

"You can do this. You'll figure things out as you go. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine!"

Knock-knock! She did it. This was the point of no return. The murmur behind the door Emilia stood in front of stopped. Then she heard the footsteps. She had grew familiar with those over the last year – Subaru was her common guest. He very often came to her room to help her with her studies.

She inhaled yet again, the door opened and then:

"Oh, hey, Emilia-tan! What is it?"

Trying her hardest (and failing) to keep her anxiety in check, Emilia began to speak:

"S-Subaru, can I take you from h-here for the moment?"

"Ah, the immature child. Get lost, we are busy."

"Emilia-sama, my apologies, but Teacher, Subaru-kun and I are currently discussing an important bui-i-isness."

"Oh…"

It was frustrating. She had tried to approach him tête-à-tête three times today, but to no avail. Each time he had been busy with something.

She was about to turn away and leave when his hand reached for her shoulder and:

"Wait, hold on there, Emilia. I can probably dedicate ten minutes of my time to you right now. Roswaal, Echidna, you two can look through the sketches while I'm gone."

-----

"Woah, slow down please, Emilia-tan, you're gonna rip my arm off if you keep it at this pace."

"Oh… sorry. I was just… deep in thought."

She quickly noticed her error. Her knight's hand was very red and even a bit swollen because of her. She dragged him out of there too fast. A swarm of her contracted lesser spirits reached for Subaru's hand and quickly fixed this unintended trauma.

"So-o-o, would you mind telling me why are you so desperate to get rid of Roswaal and Dona?"

"N-not here, too public. S-somewhere where there are no people."

"Oh, okay. Just slow down and breathe, Emilia-tan. You are redder than a setting sun."

"Ah! N-no, it's nothing… I'm just… re-e-ealy gumptious today!"

Realizing that he had probably noticed that something was wrong with her, the half-elf tried her hardest (and failed once again) to play it off.

"Nobody says that anymore, Emilia-tan."

"Mrgh!"

The familiar phrase made her even redder, adding the frustration to the previous embarrassment and anxiety into her already overwhelmed with emotions mind. Angrily, she yanked his hand again, albeit slightly more gently than before, and continued to forcefully drag him outside, to his slight dismay.

-----

"Alright, we're here. What was the point of urgency, Emilia-tan?"

"Mhm, no one's here, but the two of us. Perfect."

"Not entirely correct. Tella's still beside me."

That was an issue. Subaru translated Satella's words to the party about how impossibly difficult it was for her to physically separate from Subaru while still maintaining control over the Witch at the same time, and that for this reason she would stay beside him hence forth when they arrived in Pristella, but Emilia did not even consider that this could be a problem. Another mistake. At the same time, Satella supposedly wasn't possessive, the Witch was, so maybe it was fine?

"I-it's… fine… M-m-m, what were you, Roswaal, and Echidna doing?"

"Oh, that's a very interesting thing we want to develop! I was thinking about combining some of the new things I want to implement with the magical knowledge of those two. Magitech, pretty much."

"Magi...tekko?"

"Technological developments combined with magic. Basically, machines that use magic as a backbone. Fancy things like mana-powered engines, generators, chemistry fused with alchemy, et cetera. Cool stuff, will improve the quality of life by a lot! Those two are big on the magic part, while I can figure out the technology part."

"Oh, that's re-e-eally interesting…"

Normally it would be, but right now Emilia was too preoccupied with what she wanted to say to him.

Seconds passed, then minutes. Silence. It became more and more awkward with each passing moment. Eventually, Subaru was tired of waiting.

"Ahm, Emilia-tan. What did you want to say?"

The half-elf inhaled and then:

"Subaru, would you like to have a dayte!?"

Emilia's speech went from one extreme to the other: just a few minutes ago it had been filled with awkward pauses and stuttering, but now she had blurted out her proposal too fast. To be fair, Subaru found both adorable. Still, it took Subaru an additional three seconds just to process what she had said. And then three more. And then three more. It wasn't the sudden change in speech that surprised Emilia's knight, but rather the context of the words was unexpected instead. He pinched himself, just in case, and then:

"Emilia-tan, could you please repeat that?"

She inhaled again and:

"Subaru, would you like to have a dayte!?"

In hindsight, it would have probably been easier if she had used this one-on-one time to straight up confess her feelings to the Sage, but the half-elf's own cowardice prevented her from getting straight to the point. She still wasn't sure how he would react to the confession (an irrelevant concern, of course, he would never refuse her love), so she wanted to set up the proper mood for it to slightly increase her chances of success.

"Yep, definitely real. You did not, in fact, misspoke."

"I-is that a yes?"

"Oh, right, yes, of course! I was just surprised that you showed the initiative. Well, since you seem to be keen on a date, we can do that. I'll organize something in a few days."

"NO!"

"Emilia-tan?"

"I am organizing everything! And we're going on the dayte today, after we deal with the Council of Elders!"

"Oh, okay. What are we going to do?"

"Em-m-m, I thought we could just walk around the Capital t-together, see some sights, maybe buy s-something…"

"That's fine with me! Alright, I'll probably have some things to do this evening, but I'll try to free up as much time as I can!"

"Do you promise?"

"Mhm, yep, I promise."

The pinkies of the Sage and the Royal Candidate wrapped around one another, sealing the promise.

-----

Finally, with all the tasks done in the city of Priestella, the Sage and his associates were ready to depart for the Capital. All of the Royal Candidates were on board, of course, as were their knights (with the exception of Aldebaran, who was reported missing). Additionally, each candidate was allowed to choose an extra person to bring to the meeting with the Council: for Emilia it was Roswaal, for Crush – Wilhelm, for Anastasia – Ricardo (her spirit, who was also with the Merchant Princess, did not count), Priscilla selected Heinkel to replace her missing jester, and Felt, for lack of a better option, chose Rachins (there were better people to show to those snobs, in her opinion, but it was a matter of sending a message). Beatrice was predictably with her contractor, as was Satella with her lover, albeit the latter was hidden from the common eye. From Sage's old crew, Volcanica, Reid, Shaula, and Echidna joined the diplomatic mission, mostly to ensure the absolute legitimacy of the Sage's title before the Council. All others were to remain here in Priestella for the time being.

A plan of action in the Capital has also been thought out:

First, fly to the Capital.

Second, force an emergency meeting with all of Sage's associates included.

Third, present Subaru's reforms and convince the Council of their necessity.

Fourth, give them time to deliberate and use a designated base of the operations as a resting place (Priscilla has volunteered her mansion in the capital for this task).

Fifth, if they can't come to a conclusion in a day, conclude the meeting the next day and give the first orders to the now subservient Council.

Sixth, organize a celebration party (and get the Sage drunk again).

Seventh, begin planning the diplomatic mission to the Vollachian Empire.

And that was it. The plan seemed to satisfy all the participants (except, Subaru was not informed of the plan to get him drunk again, of course).

-----

Once again, Subaru's form shifted to that of the great black dragon.

"Subaru-dono, we exchanged a peculiar theory about you before you landed, could you please clarify if it is true?"

"What kind of theory, Wilhelm-san?"

"It's about your ancestry. Do you happen to know if one of your ancestors might have been a dragon, perhaps?"

"Ah, no way! I know my ancestry to about the sixth generation. You see, I did the family tree project back in middle school, so I know my ancestors well, and of course they were all normal humans. I mean, my dad is strong as hell, but he's not like a former sumo fighter or anything, just a dude who works out. I'm sure most of you here could beat him up. Besides, the whole transformation thing is just this stupid Capella's Authority."

For the Sage's party, the sixth generation wasn't a lot, as many of them had noble upbringings and therefore extensive family trees. The Astrea family was the most prominent in that regard, the three Astrea descendants could trace their ancestry all the way back to Reid himself. The fact that Subaru only knew of the six generations implied that the fabled dragon ancestor was even earlier, and the blood was heavily diluted, but apparently not yet completely gone. Or so Wilhelm, Heinkel, Reinhard, Crusch, Felix and Julius thought. Others did not buy it. In an accidental stroke of genius, Subaru inadvertently further reinforced "the latent dragonkin" theory that had sprung up today. Something that he might regret later.

-----

"Kadomon, look!"

"What is it, Sel?... Ah, shit! Not again..."

"Look, there are two of them this time. You said you only saw one!"

"Urgh, right. That's the one I was talking about. The blue one."

He pointed to the dragon beelining for the Royal Palace.

"Isn't that the Divine Dragon?"

"I mean, I think that's him, I'm not sure about the black one. Shit, there's gonna be trouble again."

"What do you mean?"

"Urgh, Sel, look, that thing brings me bad luck, I swear. The last time the Dragon flew over me, I had to pay ten extra silver to bribe the guards and then fix the bloody wheel for that hag. I have a feeling like my streak of bad luck is far from over."

-----

"Renowned Elders! *inhale* Renowned Elders!"

"What is it, kid?"

The young royal knight who rushed into the room looked incredibly winded, he was clearly not used to the long sprints. Truth be told, the Council wasn't particularly energetic either, as they hadn't slept since their unanticipated gathering this early morning.

"Hold on, kid. Just breathe in and breathe out. Now, report."

"Two dragons… *inhale* ...have just arrived in the Capital. They are right here... *inhale* ...at the front gate, waiting for you. One appears to be the Divine Dragon, and the other one,.. *inhale* ...I'm not sure,.. *inhale* ...his mate, perhaps? In any case, riding on them were the other guests – all five Royal Candidates and their attendants,.. *inhale* ...all requesting the audience."

"Well, colleagues, I think we have to organize the emergency meeting in the main hall."

"Agreed, Miklotov, only the main hall can fit two dragons inside. You, lad, go get yourself something to drink before you collapse. Dismissed."

"Yes, Captain Marcos!"

-----

The Divine Dragon entered the room first, just barely fitting through the massive doors to the hall. Eleven of the most important people in Lugunica at the moment hastily prostrated themselves before the great beast. As for the Divine Dragon himself, he nodded respectfully in return. His supposed mate entered gracefully second (there was no mention of Volcanica having a mate in the historical records, but it wouldn't be too surprising to know that this fact was simply lost to time). Aside from five Royal Candidates and their attendants, who quickly dismounted the great beasts, there seemed to be a few additional guests: An unknown brown-haired lady with a long ponytail; a blonde little girl with drill hair and a regal dress – the contracted great spirit of Natsuki Subaru, Lady Beatrice; a pink-haired half-elf who looked at the Council members with inquisitive eyes; and a red-haired gentleman with blue eyes in an odd robe who bore a striking resemblance to the members of the Astrea family. Only two important people seemed to be missing – the knights of both Emilia and Priscilla Camps, Sir Natsuki Subaru and Sir Aldebaran.

"Distinguished guests, welcome to..."

"Where is he?!"

"Ahem, manners, Bordeaux, manners. Distinguished guests, welcome to the Royal Palace. You've all requested an audience, yes? We are happy to oblige. However, it seems that some very important participants in the future discussion are missing. May we inquire about their whereabouts?"

"Mine clown simply ran away. 'Tis no bother to mineself, he served according to his own will."

"Ehm, Subaru was re-e-eally bu-..."

"No need, Emilia-sama, I will represent our Camp in your ste-e-ead. My apologies, Renowned Elde-e-ers. Subaru-kun had to attend an important diplomatic mi-i-ision. Needless to say, that I will do my best to translate to convey his wishes as we-e-ell."

"What kind of mission, Lord Mathers?"

"'Tis a matter of great se-e-ecrecy. It involves diplomatic relations with our dear neighbors in the so-o-outh."

"The Vollachians? That traitor is colluding with the Vollachians?!"

"Sh-h-h, Bordeaux."

"No, I won't shut up, Marcos! First he desecrates the dragon stone, then…"

"Mine dear compatriot, what is that makes thou assume that mine dear friend violated mine speaking stone?"

"But, Divine Dragon, he wrote…"

"All that is written on the dragon stone is indeed true. The great change is cometh and mine dear friend is the one to lead it!"

"But that still doesn't excuse..."

"Now-now, Bordeaux. I believe it is important to maintain relations with our neighbors. The paperwork for this expedition can wait."

"And what's of these outsiders?"

"Outsiders, huh, we built this place for that wissel Farsale."

"Who are…" "you?"

"Reid Astrea. Da strongest dragonslayah in all da land!"

The jaws of the poor Council members dropped. He looked remarkably alike to the way he was drawn in the historical paintings.

"Reid Astrea!? The First Sword Saint..."

"A Pervert and a Stick Swinger, that's what he is!"

"Oi, Bimbo! Introduce yourself, then, ya Flugel's doormat."

"I'll gladly be Master's doormat, although I prefer to be Master's Dakimakura instead. Oh, right, I'm Shaula, Master's apprentice."

Another jaw drop. Although this time there was a slight confusion about the Sage's gender.

"Shaula? The Sage..."

"She's not the Great Sage you've claim her to be. Rather, just a servant of the real one."

Before it became worse, a purple-haired half-elf preemptively clarified the confusion.

"And you?"

"Oh, I'm just a researcher, fascinated by all kinds of knowledge. I don't believe my name would tell you much, but it is… Omega."

Unlike the previous two, this name did not evoke the bewildered stares. Some of the Sage's associates turned their heads when they heard that name, only to receive a knowing grin in return.

"And the other beast… I mean, Benevolent Dragon, what is the name of your mate?"

"Aha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

The Sun Princess, who previously had been wearing an enigmatic smile, suddenly erupted into a joyful laughter. One by one, the other guests gradually soon joined her. First it was Anastasia, then Felt joined in, then Reid and Volcanica began chuckling, then Roswaal pitched in as well, until everyone who had arrived in the Capital began laughing at the idea of Subaru being the Divine Dragon's bride. Except for Subaru himself.

"What's so funny?"

The previously silent black dragon finally opened "her" mouth:

"I mean, it is very funny in context. I guess I can always pass as a girl, even if I look like this. Told you guys, it's worth it to remain incognito."

"Excuse me, who are you?"

"Oh, no one noteworthy, really. A child of Naoko and Kenshi Natsuki; a former butler of the Mathers Mansion, before we accidentally burned it down; a knight of the wonderful Emilia-tan, whose gorgeous smile brings radiant beauty to this world; a contractor of the cutest and smartest spirit in existence, albeit I hate that stupid nickname that I got because of that; a vanquisher of the Witch Cult and the great witchbeasts, even if most of the time I just stand there while others do the fighting; a hero of the people of Priestella, or so I'm told, no idea how that happened; a subjugator of the Pleiades Watchtower, the result of me drunkenly stumbling through my own trials; a friend to this wild bunch, though I guess they think I am the wild one; and, finally, the Great Sage of Lugunica, even if there's no way I deserve that stupid title."

Suddenly, the black dragon with the evil-looking eyes shifted back to his original form.

"My name is Natsuki Subaru, and I'm still a bit clueless, but at least I am no longer broke beyond compare, so there's that. Pleasure to meet you, Renowned Elders."

Chapter Text

The meeting stretched on… and on… and on… First, the events of the attack on Priestella had to be recounted, as most of the details were still unknown to the Council members. That took a while. Then the events after it, how the celebration party started, why everyone was so adamant on bullying the Emilia's knight to drink, then how he managed to draw the Dragon Sword Reid and the Yang Sword. Then the arrival of his old companions, the reveal of his past as the Sage, and plans for the global reform. After that, the events of the expedition to the Pleiades Watchtower were recounted. Discovery of the Yin Sword, completion of the trials of the Tower, the subjugation of Louis Arneb and Capella Emerada Lugunica. Then the eventual return to Priestella, the rescue of the victims of Lust, and finally the arrival here. Some parts were intentionally omitted from the recount: everything involving the Witches of Sin, especially Satella, and the fact that two of the former Archbishops were also in the Subaru's crew, for obvious reasons. Avoiding further scandal seemed necessary, as either of these details could lead to him being declared a traitor. Authorities had to be mentioned, because otherwise it would be impossible to explain his draconic transformation, and that already made the members of the Council doubt his integrity.

Then came the next part. The concept and all the details that Subaru had already explained to the Royal Candidates had to be repeated in great detail. New political structure, technological and magical advancements, changes in diplomacy with neighboring states, social reforms. In short, it was a whole dissertation. Just describing everything made Subaru incredibly weary.

Reactions were mixed. Some reactionary members of the Council of Elders who rallied behind Bordeaux openly opposed to most of the proposals, there were those who were pro-reform and nodded in agreement with his ideas, Captain Marcos spoke for them (even though he wasn't an official member of the Council, he nonetheless had a considerable sway over their decision), finally, the "opportunists" (that's what Subaru decided to call them) who were led by Miklotov occasionally supported either one side or the other. He did his best seller's pitch towards the "reformists" and the "opportunists", but it seemed not to be enough. Overall, the results looked… inconclusive, as all the three factions were in a very shaky balance.

"This looks bad…"

The balance meant no majority, and no majority means nothing is gets done. And that meant the "reactionaries" were winning. There were some things that the whole Council unanimously agreed on, but there were too few of those.

"Urgh, why is this so difficult! Why can't you all agree on this! Why can't I just have a normal happy kingdom like in Tensura!"

The Sage gradually began to lose his temper. His speech began to harden, his expression grew harsher, his posture gradually became more and more aggressive. He became more and more pushy, which in turn only antagonized the members of the Council against him.

"Urgh, why am I even talking to them! They are just a bunch of old, useless snobs!"

His last proposal, to ease restrictions on building in the cities for members of various demi-human races, was mercilessly shut down by the majority of the council. As with all the pro-Emilia proposals he had tried, this one had also failed. Of course, the pro-demi-human policies wasn't the only things among his ideas that the Council refused to accept. Most proposals to improve the quality of life for the middle and lower classes were vetoed as well. Pretty much anything that did not directly benefit the upper class was rejected or "delayed until a consensus could be reached within the Council" (which meant pretty much the same thing as failure).

As his anger continued to rise, something odd had occurred. It was completely imperceptible to all, but the very few – more specifically, the blonde spirit holding Subaru's hand and the silver-haired half-elf hiding in his shadow. A wave of something dark, something indescribable and invisible to the eye, passed them by. Through their respective connections with the Sage, they could sense it. It wasn't too difficult to guess what it was – the Witch Factor of Wrath. A raw, destructive, and all-consuming fury.

-----

Wrath.

Wrath was his frustration, his anger, his hatred. It nested deep within, behind the happy smiles, behind the facade of the hero that he wore, even behind his despair and all of his traumatic episodes. It was one of the part of the remnants of his ego that he had gradually buried since his teenage years. Anger and frustration at being rejected by his childhood friends. Anger at his parents for watching him spiral into depression instead of helping him grow. And anger at himself for hiding in his room like the little coward he was. And there were many things in this new world that made him angry. You see, due to the nature of the Return by Death, he happened to see the worst sides of the people he knew, yet despite that he tried to forgive them, after all he'd be alone otherwise. So Subaru had to accept them, had to look them in the eye, knowing that most of them had hurt him and might hurt him again. More so, he had to make them better people. But of course, he had never forgotten. Wrath was a tiny piece of the hatred towards them that Subaru tried so hard to repress. Wrath was the part of Subaru that hated him being hurt by the people around him. Nay, by the world that kept trying to hurt him.

Like Return by Death, the Authority of Wrath wasn't controlled, rather it merely reacted to his emotions. Uncontrolled, unfocused, indiscriminate, it lashed out at the world around him, breaking it one piece at the time. The world that he hated, and the world that hated him in turn.

-----

A small piece of the world snapped, cracked, and shattered. Alongside it, the mana inside it shattered as well. And then another, and then another one. There were two reasons why Beatrice and Satella noticed it first. Beatrice was a being of mana by nature, so when a part of her self began to twist into miasma, she reacted immediately. To her, it was akin to a wound or a tumor, and it was not pleasant. As for Satella, the incredibly delicate matrix of the spell hiding her began to unwind due to this mana collapse, creating a small leak of concentrated miasma that she released. Said miasma merged with his, further amplifying the effects of his Authority and creating a feedback loop. At the same time, their emotional bond made her incredibly vulnerable to his Authority and awakened Envy, causing Satella additional difficulties.

"Love, it's okay. You can get through to them."

That was all she could do to calm him right now.

"It's okay, Subaru, Betty is here."

Beatrice joined in as well, diverting her contractor's attention to herself for a moment by gently squeezing his hand, thus calming his anger.

Finally, there was a third actor. He too noticed the unknown distortion rather quickly. He couldn't explain how he did, he felt as if something around him screamed, yet he clearly did not hear it with his ears. When the same thing happened the second time, Reinhard started to look around until he finally found the source of the distortion after the fourth time it happened.

"Subaru, I think that's enough for today. This is going nowhere. Let's continue the discussion tomorrow."

"The Sword Saint is right, Commo- Sage. They won't listen."

Surprising the people around her, Priscilla was so serious that she actually used Subaru's title. She wasn't the first one to notice that something was wrong, yet her intuition told her that the Sage was about to do something terrible if his frustration with this situation escalated any further.

"Hey there, hold on, Sword Saint! And you too, Lady Priscilla. There's one more thing we want to say to the "Sage"!"

"Yes, Bordeaux and I had a discussion before you arrived, Sir Subaru. We came to an agreement about some changes in your status."

"Status? Can you explain, what you imply? Be truthful."

"Well, Lady Crusch, given Sir Subaru's unique destiny, as well as the danger his abilities represent, we have decided to provide him with an additional escort. To ensure your safety."

"Lie."

Needless to say, the winds of untruth swirled around Miklotov.

"Oi, safety?! Flugel's not in danger! He is da danger! He's da one that knocks!"

"That as well. These Authorities do not seem to be particularly… stable. So we also want to add additional restrictions on movement."

Suddenly, the Authority of Wrath reactivated itself again, reacting to the sudden spike of anger.

"Restrictions? But Subaru hasn't done anything wrong, he's a good boy! Re-e-eally good boy!"

"It's mainly a contingency. Just in case something bad happens to him, not if he does something bad himself, Lady Emilia. We think the newly liberated Pleiades Watchtower is a perfect spot. It is your home, yes?"

"Well, yeah, but…"

"You don't get it! Master can't be contained, especially in his own home! And if you piss him off like that, he'll start breaking faces!"

"That he will, I am certain of it. I wonder what he will do now."

Echidna also felt the trembling in the air, the hot flame of Wrath. If her calculations were correct, the Sage was a hair's breadth away from fully activating it.

"We will acknowledge your claim to this place if you agree. And of course we will provide you with the necessary supplies to live there."

"I don't like this, Nii-chan. Smells like another Reinhard's Law."

Of course, Subaru understood this himself.

"Oh, but it is not, Lady Felt. It is done primarily for the safety of the Sage, not the other way around. But of course, there must also be some political restrictions. Those involving your knight title and your participation in the affairs of the Emilia Camp."

"My, my, fellow lords. Are you considering stripping Subaru-kun of his knightho-o-o-od? That seems most unwi-i-ise."

The not so subtle threat did not go unnoticed by the Council. Some members instinctively flinched from Roswaal's cold gaze.

"Well, Lord Mathers, we still need to confirm his noble bearing. A year ago you were quick to vouch for him, however some necessary bureaucratic procedures were skipped. We seek to rectify that. While your own words carry much weight, they are not enough to guarantee the purity of his lineage. Until said investigation is completed, we would have to temporarily revoke his privileges."

"Ah, so you want to strip Subaru-kyun's knighthood because he doesn't look like a local? How predictable."

Felix was very familiar with this exact kind of discrimination.

"Huh, so it's not da Reinhard's Law, it's worse."

"No, it's the equivalent of shoving him into the deepest cell and burying the keys, Anastasia-sama..."

"...which is fucking awful considering what the boy has done for the Kingdom!"

Both the Merchant Princess and her knight scoffed, while Ricardo growled in anger at the Council decision.

"It seems so. 'Tis unfortunate that those who follow the will of my late friend Farsale are against his sworn brother."

"Farsale's bloodline is gone, Volc. Those assholes are just some paper pushers. Flugel, whose face do ya want to smash into da ground first? Just point at one. I'd say this one."

Before Bordeaux could respond in any way, the Stick Swinger inhaled and then… suddenly spat right in to his face! It was a quite impressive shot, to be honest, considering the fact that it landed right in his eye and that there was about a dozen meters between the two of them.

"Good shot, redhead, fuck these assholes!"

"Lady Felt!"

"Oi, shut up, Rein!"

"Good attitude, kid! Don't let those assholes to control yo buddy!"

"Nice one, Perv! I'll take the next shot. Hell Sni-…"

Before Shaula could finish channeling her magic, Reinhard quickly interposed himself between the Scorpio and her presumed target.

"We will not tolerate this disrespect! Reinhard, by the authority of this kingdom, restrain this brute! And grab the other loudmouth as well! And the Sage too, we are finished here!"

"Huh, ya're funny, pipsqueak. Oi, kiddo, outta da way. We don't wanna fight ya."

Nevertheless, Reid's two signature wooden weapons were drawn.

"Rein, if you dare touch your family or Nii-chan on their orders, I'm walking out of here."

"Reinhard, don't listen to the Council! Stand by Subaru-dono!"

"I stand with you for now, son, for the sake of your mother, but if you bow to them, the truce between us is over. You won't be my kid anymore."

Both Reinhard's father and grandfather showed a surprising unity in their decisions. For the brief moment the Sword Saint closed his eyes, took a deep breath, than turned towards the Elders.

"Well, Renowned Members of the Council, it seems that my liege has strictly forbidden me to follow your orders, as has my family. My apologies. Besides, I happen to be off duty today. Funny how that always happens when the things get interesting."

Inadvertently, Reinhard activated his Divine Protection of Perfect Sarcasm. Needless to say, he made his choice.

All of the Sage's attendants were against this decision for one reason or another, and all of them showed their support in one way or another. However, Subaru himself paid no attention. One by one, more and more pieces of the world crumbled as Subaru's emotional state began growing more and more unstable.

"First they laughed at my ideas, now they want to put me in a cage and force me to abandon my friends!?"

And then he finally crossed the line, and the effects of his Authority finally became visible.

Stomp!

The stone floor beneath him creaked loudly as a crack appeared in the ground beneath his foot. Said crack then quickly snaked out from the place where he had stomped into the ground, toward the Elders. All eleven flinched, surprised by the sudden show of force. But the Council members weren't the target of Subaru's temper tantrum. No, the target was the vacant throne of the Kingdom of Lugunica. The second the distortion reached it, it began to glow, then squeak, then stretch a bit, and then it suddenly exploded into a cloud of dust. That quickly silenced everyone.

"That's what I think of your "authority"."

Everyone was so startled that they missed the unintentional pun.

Red-faced from his sheer fury, he spat on the ground that was shaken by his Wrath, drew his curved sword, but instead of attacking:

"Let's go, Beako."

The former was barely conscious due to the effects of his Authority, yet she still followed her contractor through the newly created tear in space regardless.

And then he was gone. The silence continued for a moment until the certain half-elf broke it.

"Subaru, wait!"

Before she could run away, one of the Royal Candidates interrupted her.

"Halt, half-wit! The keys."

"Oh, right. Thank you, Priscilla. I'll search for him there too."

She immediately understood that she had given them to her just in case Subaru returns to their new base of operations just like they planned. Looking incredibly worried, she stormed out of the meeting hall. With that, the Half-Elf Princess was the next one to leave this failed meeting.

"Damn, Natsuki-kun's no joke."

"Yeah. That was a-a-awesome! Master is so cool!"

"Not what I meant, lass. He's gonna give me a heart attack. What's next, domestic te-rro-rism? Da re-vo-lu-tion?"

When Subaru sobered up, she asked him what that word meant, as well as a few others. At that point, she half expected him to drop the S.M.B. on the Royal Palace.

-----

One by one, the other guests followed the example of the Sage, leaving no official response to the Council of Elders. As they left, only one person was left to understand the extent of their hubris:

"Well, we are screwed."

"Calm down, Marcos. This was merely the process of political barter. You declare your price, the buyer declares his, you both meet in the middle. We had no intention of putting the Sage in chains. Pity about the throne, though."

"The fuck are you talking about, Miklotov! You said we could do it, you rat! We managed to chain Reinhard, the same can be done with him."

"With Dragon vouching for him? In no reality could we do that."

"You're both idiots! Don't you understand!? Now you have alienated all the people you will have to work with later!"

The captain of the Royal Knights stormed off as well, the only person who was completely against the Elders' stupid plan. He was done, there was no point in attending their meetings, their organization would soon be declared illegitimate anyway. It was time for the Captain of the Royal Knights to pick the right side.

-----

"Subaru!"

Emilia went from room to room, asking people along the way if they had seen her knight. Predictably, they had not. The spirits weren't much help either, as this odd Authority of his caused all the spirits (that weren't the Great Spirits like Beatrice or Foxchidna) in the castle to scatter. Finally, after leaving the front gates of the castle, she found someone who had seen her knight.

"Oh, right, he was here. And a little blonde girl too – I think that one was his spirit, right? I heard he had a spirit looking like a little gi-…"

"Yes, Beatrice, his spirit. Where did he go?!"

"I dunno."

"What do you mean?!"

"I mean he suddenly came here out of some kind of dark swirly... thing... screamed like once or twice so loud that I swear the ground shook, and then said something, I think it was: "Stella, so can you show me that shaduwolking spell?". Then he whispered something else and disappeared again!"

"Swirly thing… Stella… the shaduwolking spell…"

Suddenly, it clicked. Swirly thing was the portal that he used to leave the throne room. Stella wasn't Stella, but Satella, and the shaduwolking spell was something that he chose to hide himself and his spirit with so that no one would find them! A kind of Yin magic that Satella used for the same purpose! Unfortunately, her excitement at uncovering this mystery was cut short when Emilia realized one very important thing: now it was completely impossible to find him unless he wants to be found! That caused her to panic once again. Well, at least she could still check the places he might go to: Priscilla's Mansion was the only place she could think of.

-----

She arrived at the place rather quickly. The place was incredibly lavish, probably even more lavish than the two manors that Emilia lived in at the behest of her sponsor. But it was also… empty. That made her doubt that Subaru was even here, given he didn't even have a key in the first place. But he might have he used his Reality Slasha to bypass the front door, so just in case, Emilia still opened the front gates and ran quickly through each room, hoping to find him. Predictably, her hopes were dashed.

"Liar. Liar. Liar!"

Another promise broken. But just as despair was about to overwhelm her, she suddenly received unexpected salvation. Before arriving here, she had scattered her contracted lesser spirits throughout the city to search for them. One of them contacted the half-elf with positive news:

"He's in a Merchant District somewhere!"

Unfortunately, the lesser spirits were not aware enough to track him effectively, but at least Emilia knew in which part of the city Subaru was in. Quickly wiping away her tears, she rushed to the Sage's presumed location.

-----

Of course, just knowing in which district Subaru was currently in wasn't really enough to find him. Emilia did her best and asked people about the boy, but given her appearance, many shunned her. Some simply avoided her, some hurled insults at her, while some actively sabotaged her search by misdirecting her. The half-elf wasn't too surprised by this, still the urgency made her a lot more frustrated by something that she was generally used to. So she spent three hours (or until late in the evening) running around the District before she eventually found her second clue.

"Argh, my head! Ble-e-eagh!"

Emilia didn't know why she was suddenly paying attention to the banter of of two passing drunks, but for whatever reason, she was.

"I told you, you can't outdrink that boy. I heard from a guy from Guteko that black-haired people are bad news. Vile shamans, miscreants, bandits and rogues, all of them! And those terrible eyes..! Makes me flinch just thinking about them!"

"That's bullshit, Rian. Hair color and eyes doesn't make someone…"

They finally noticed her. Of course, both of them immediately became hostile. Ironic.

"Oi, that's the Witch! Sate-"

"Excuse me, I heard you were talking about…"

"Sh-h-h, don't make her mad. We don't know anything… lady. Let's go, Val."

"I'm not Satella… I just want to know…"

"Get lost, you monster! Gua-a-ards, the Witch wants to curse us!"

"I'm sorry, I just want to ask you, do you know that person's name?"

"Val, calm down. Name? Name of whom?"

"The black-haired person you were drinking with."

"Oh, so you wanna curse him instead? Nasty whore!"

"No! I was just looking for the black-haired boy. He is about this tall and wears a black and orange clothing that he calls a tracksuit. He has very pretty black eyes, although many find them creepy at first. He is always smiling and knows how to get along with most people around him. He's very gentle and kind, and honestly quite handsome, but he always breaks his promises and finds a way to get into trouble. It makes me re-e-eally worried. I think he got into a scuffle again… He is... important to me..."

The half-elf's dreamy and love-struck expression surprised the pair so much that they let their guard down for a bit.

"...oh, and he should also have a blonde girl in a pink dress with him."

"Eh, I think that's exactly that guy that you lost to, Val. Hm-m-m, he had a weird name... Baru, I think."

"Suba, his name was Suba, Rian."

"Suba… Baru... Oh yes, that's him! Could you please tell me where you last saw him?"

Emilia jumped from the excitement of finally locating her knight.

"Urgh, will you let us go?"

"Let you go? Oh, yeah, right, of course! I won't bother you."

"Scarlet Maiden. Three quarters in that direction."

"Thank you!"

-----

Finding the place wasn't all too difficult. After entering the tavern, she began to look around, trying to find him. She thought she had wasted her time, following the dead lead again, but then suddenly:

"Oh, he-e-ey there, Emilia-tan. How did you ge-e-et here?"

Sitting at one of the larger tables was her knight, mug in hand, and on his lap was his favorite blonde spirit. Then Emilia also noticed the familiar red-haired swordsman who had somehow found her knight first, Reid Astrea. However, Emilia wasn't thinking about the Stick Swinger at all, rather her first thought upon discovering the Sage in this half-wrecked tavern was:

"Oh no! Subaru is drunk again!"

Chapter Text

The Scarlet Maiden was a rather old establishment situated in the middle of the Merchant District. It was founded all the way back at the ending of the Demi-human War by a sergeant turned businessman called Viktor, or just Vik. The man used to be quite a fighter back then, but the time wasn't kind to him as he slowly lost his hearing and had use a cane to get around. The name of the pub, of course, came from the late Sword Saint – Theresia van Astrea. Its usual patrons were people of decent, but by no means abundant, wealth: artisans, traders, even the occasional lesser noble. Overall, the Scarlet Maiden was a rather civil pub: well-kept, clean, with good service, pretty barmaids, solid guest rooms, good food and drink, and infrequent fights.

Well, it was that way before. When Emilia arrived to this place, the only way she could describe it would be wrecked. Several of the old tables had been joined together in the middle of the main room to form a single communal table where most of the tavern's patrons were currently seated. To the right of the gathering, the remains of another unfortunate piece of furniture lay alongside to its spilled contents. Dirt, grime, and empty bottles littered the floor. The place reeked of alcohol and vomit. The people were, predictably, heavily inebriated, chatting, singing songs, and, of course, getting even more hammered. Both barmaids currently on shift who were on duty at the time were running back and forth between the rapidly dwindling supply and the customers. Meanwhile, the bartender (and owner of this establishment) was absentmindedly polishing a glass, clearly unconcerned with the situation in his establishment.

In the middle of all this chaos were the three culprits: the red-haired swordsman, who currently was reciting his buddy one of their drunken adventures; the blonde spirit, the accomplice of the leader of this party, who was currently stuffing herself with more and more sweets; and finally the main culprit: one of the most renown people in modern (and past) Lugunica, the ingenious strategist and amazing diplomat, the brave slayer of Great Witchbeasts and the Witch Cult, the sexiest man in all existence according to many women and even some men (especially according to the certain most terrifying being in all existence who was still hiding beside him), the chaos incarnate, the bane of this world order, the architect of fate, the one and only – Natsuki Subaru, The Drunken Sage. Roll credits.

"Oh, he-e-ey there, Emilia-tan. How did you ge-e-et here?"

Aside from the Sage, who had been the first to notice his liege, no one else had noticed the Half-Elf Princess, but that was quickly changing. One by one everyone turned towards the doorway where Emilia was currently standing in.

"Oi! That's a half-de-…"

Before the man next to Subaru could finish, he was punched in the face and fell to the ground.

"A-a-anyone that will bad-mouth my Emilia-tan gets a knu-u-uckle sandwich! Got it?"

"And a Minya in the face from Betty as well, in fact!"

"Ok sure, Flugel."

"Yep, got it, Baru."

"Aye-aye, Subs."

One by one, his drinking companions all agreed to be polite to his liege. No one wanted to receive a knuckle sandwich, as it turned out.

"Wait, hold on, Sub. That's the Royal Candidate. The half-elf one!"

"It took you this long to figure that out, Rey? That guy is Natsuki Subaru! And this is his charge, Lady Emilia."

"Wait, really? I thought he was just bullshitting you guys… He did not look like the great Lolimancer."

"With a little girl literally right in his hands? Really, Rey? How stupid are you?"

"Urgh, listen, I thought the real guy is all posh and noble-like. This Subaru is not like that at all!"

"We-e-ell, I wasn't bullshittin' you people! I'm the real guy! I was never a posh brat a-a-anyway. And yo-o-ou, Mark. For your crime of badmouthin' the cu-u-utest Candidate for the throne of Lugunica, your punishment i-i-is… losin' your chair. Come he-e-ere, Emilia-tan, I'd saved you a spot."

"Urgh, fine. Get your Princess seated. I'll find another one."

Gingerly Emilia approached the seat. The chair was far from clean, so she had to sit just on the edge of it. For a brief moment, she was a bit stupefied by the atmosphere, until she suddenly remembered something important she wanted to say:

"Subaru-u-u, you nincompoop, I was looking everywhere for you!"

"First of a-a-all, no one says that anymo-o-ore. And secondly, why the se-e-earch? Reid, Beako, and I were just chillin'! We would've come back in the mornin' a-a-anyway!"

"Have you forgotten about what we talked about in Priestella!?"

She couldn't dare to say out loud that the main reason she was wasting her time searching for him was because of the date that they had arranged back then. It would be far too embarrassing to admit it in front of all these people.

"When?"

"You don't remember!? Before we departed! Near the bridge…"

"Dunderhead! How could you forget!"

"Oh, about the da-a-ate? Oh, right, shi-i-it, we planned it for today… My ba-a-ad…"

Emilia was blushing, nay, she was completely red. He wasn't supposed to say that out loud! It was private. That was the reason why she had pulled him away from Roswaal and Echidna in the first place.

"Wait… can't we just go out no-o-ow? I'm down!"

"It's already too late. The sun is almost down and, well, you are re-e-eally drunk…"

"'lright, then how 'bout tomorrow?"

"Okay... Tomorrow... hopefully..."

Emilia was dejected. Promises were very important to the half-elf and she re-e-eally hated just how easily Subaru broke them. Part of her doubted that he even wanted to go on a date with her. Part of her even doubted that he wanted to be with her at all.

"Now that he has Rem and Satella…"

For Subaru, it was no a big deal. They could always have a bunch of dates later, since he was still a little pissed off about the Council of Elders right now anyway. Still, he did wrapped his free from the mug arm around the half-elf as she seemed to be quite upset.

"We-e-ell, sayin' "I promise" would probably feel like stickin' a second knife in, so let's just sa-a-ay we'll try our best to do the date tomo-o-orrow. And this time we both think of places that we could go to."

"'ey, Subs, why are you two so lovey-dovey? Are you two bangin'? Weird, I heard a rumor that all Princesses have to be virgins…"

"No-o-ope! No wa-a-ay! Don't go there! We're not that fa-a-ar, dude. We just sorta hangin' out… Not even a couple yet, re-e-eally… I mean, there was that one time at the Sanctuary, but I feel like I kinda fo-o-orced that..."

"Subaru, what is "banging"?"

"Oi, she really is a virgin! Listen, girl. When he shoves his…"

"SHUT UP."

The ground beneath them all suddenly shook, causing a momentary silence.

"Don't defile my Emilia's i-i-innocence! We'll get there when we'll ge-e-et there. It's not somethin' the adorable girls like you, Emilia-tan, should know at tha-a-at age."

"Oh, okay."

Emilia was slightly frustrated by his secrecy, but because of just how passionately he wanted to hide what that meant, Emilia decided to let it go.

"She's older than you, in fact."

"So are yo-o-ou, but you still need to be prote-e-ected too, Beako."

"Betty knows everything there is to know, I suppose. Not that she cares about it."

"Oh no-o-o! My adorable Beako has been defi-i-iled! Probably by a-a-all the smut that was stored in that accu-u-ursed library, come to think of it. Glad it's gone!"

"Mother had preserved the ancient knowledge in there, not some vulgar novels, in fact!"

That was a lie. There were indeed some of those novels in there, but not too many. Beatrice wasn't sure if that was a result of her Mother's thirst for knowledge about everything, or just a thirst for something, no, rather for someone else.

"Su-u-ure."

"Urgh!"

"By the way, Beatrice, why did you not prevent Subaru from getting into this state?"

"You saw how disturbed he was back then, didn't you? He needed to wind down. So did Betty, in fact. His reckless use of his power harmed me. So we made a deal: Betty gets as much candy as she might want, and Betty's Subaru gets drinks in the same proportion. A fair exchange, I suppose."

"And you, Reid?"

"Nah, I'd never, lass! Flugel and his booze are inseparable! And I mean, he was already like that that when I found him here."

"How did you find him?"

"Oh, I'd figured he wanted to get smashed after talkin' to those assholes all day! If he still had that stupid sword we made, I woulda found him in a jiffy, but it was in da hands of that kid, Reinhard. So instead I followed a trail of broken tables and ruined taverns 'til I found him here."

"The trail of ruined taverns?"

"Oh yeah, me and Beako were thrown out of thre-e-e-e places! I even paid for all the damage I ca-a-aused! And they still kicked me o-o-out! Jerks. "You keep causin' fights!" "You ruined all our furniture!" "The front wall is missin'!" Hah, excu-u-uses! They just can't handle the strongest existence that is me-e-e, Natsuki Subaru!"

"Betty's contractor is correct. There's no one greater than him, in fact!"

"But you're not going to ruin my establishment like that, are you?"

The previously silent bartender finally spoke up. He, well, expected some dirt or a few broken tables, but the front wall… That would be too much for the old man's heart.

"He-e-ey, I'll pay for all the da-a-amage, and drinks, and extra…"

"Alright, as long as your pay exceeds the damage, you are welcome here, Sir Subaru."

"See, now the previous places were a-a-all garbage. Vik's here the re-e-eal bro. Though the drinks still suck a-a-ass like e-e-everywhere else."

"Yep, nothin' matches yo brew, Flugel."

"You have exquisite taste, gentlemen. I'm sorry I can't offer you anything better."

Frankly, not even the rarest and most expensive fifty-year-old spirits were satisfactory enough for the Sage and the Stick Swinger.

There were two reasons for this: the first and the most obvious one was that four hundred years in the prime conditions for distilling alcohol in the cellars of the Pleiades Watchtower could not be surpassed by anything else made after the Great Disaster. The second reason was not obvious, for the Sage's brew was a result of the old forgotten technique.

Only one person, now called Omega, still knew about it, for she and the past-Sage were the only ones who knew the unique properties of the stored whiskey. It was a product of their "Mana Potion" project, a more efficient way to recuperate and amplify one's ability to use mana. They dissolved the mana essence contained in the stones scattered throughout the Elior Forest in the highest quality booze the Sage could find (after trial and error, alcohol turned out to be the best natural solution for mana). It was much more complicated than it sounds – simply dunking the mana stone into the bottle wasn't enough. Rather, various lesser spirits were used to slowly dissolve the mana into the drink, creating an even mixture. The main difficulty was in controlling the spirits, as one had to have a ginormous affinity to ensure the perfect technique. Of course, the type of mana also had to match the spirit that was using it. Depending on the type of mana and the spirit, the effects differed too: Aurora, for example, was created with Yang mana and amplified awareness; Constellation – with Earth mana, augmented the drinker with the greater resistance; Night Expanse – with Wind mana, augmented speed; Solar Eclipse – with Fire mana, increased raw strength; Lunar Eclipse – with Water mana, provided increased healing; Silver Beauty – with Yin mana, augmented spiritual affinity; and finally, the Pleiades Premium was the result of a perfect blend of all six types, provided the drinker with all the aforementioned benefits. And, of course, each of them provided increased mana flow of the matching type, granting additional magical strength to the caster's gate.

Overall, the results were astonishing, but at the same time somewhat disappointing – while the taste and the effects were incredibly pronounced, so was the kick that these drinks caused, as it was also augmented by the mana. This, along with the aforementioned difficulties in preparation, limited the scope of use to the Sage himself, who was not only the only one in the group with sufficient spiritual affinity, but also the only one who could somehow drink these "mana drinks" as much as he wanted. Still, in Echidna's mind, it was an incredible success, and one of many reasons she admired the Sage's genius.

"So you've been visiting taverns and drinking? I ran around the entire Merchant District and could not find you anywhere."

"Ya shoulda looked longer, lass, clearly ya obviously don't know shit about Flugel's habits. Of course he'd be gettin' smashed right now!"

"You're wrong. We've known each other for over a year by now! The former Subaru wasn't someone to indulge like that at all!"

"Well, Anastasia's bu-u-ullshit interrogation is what led me down this path! There's no more turnin' back no-o-ow! Alcoholism is my thin' no-o-ow! Speakin' of, you haven't apologized to me, Emilia-tan. You were one of the cu-u-ulprits!"

"I'm sorry… I was just worried… You looked re-e-eally stressed back then. And, well, I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to know about your past, too…"

"Apology accepted."

Subaru immediately regretted guilt-tripping Emilia like that. She looked almost tearful.

"Lady, would you like a drink too?"

"M-m-m, something non-alcoholic, or maybe just a tiny bit alcoholic."

"Oi, Vic, get her the Sunset. It's just a bit of me-e-ead mixed with milk and cherry, Emilia-tan. Ve-e-ery tame."

"Cherry?"

"Oh, ri-i-ight, it probably has a different name he-e-ere in Lugunica..."

"Sure, one Sunset on your tab coming up, Sir Subaru."

-----

An hour passed and the impromptu continuation of yesterday's party continued. Emilia took two glasses of Sunset and one of Mirth, getting only slightly tipsy so far. Both drinks were incredibly tame and she'd figured that Subaru was taking some of her drinking load anyway. The atmosphere became a bit calmer as Sage and Stick Swinger continued to describe their wild tales, Betty continued to munch on sweets and Emilia, well, she occasionally pinched in when Subaru began mumbling nonsense.

"...And then Rem caught me with her chains ju-u-ust as I was about to smash into the ground! It was a rough landin' though!"

He thankfully omitted the fact that he had smashed face first into the oni's bosom, otherwise the Half-elf Princess beside him would have been awfully jealous.

"And then what?"

"Well, that was all ki-i-inda my master plan… So-o-omewhat… I mean, I improvised a bi-i-it. After the Whale plummeted behind me, it wa-a-asn't dead, just a bit concussed, and of co-o-ourse pissed at me for trickin' it. So, Rem, Patrasche and I were immediately cha-a-ased by the thin', all the way to the designated spo-o-ot."

"How? You fell from the height of the Flugel Tree and still had the will to keep go on?"

"Ho-o-onestly, that one was one hundred perce-e-ent on Rem and Patrasche for savin' my ass. Well, anyway. When the Whale reached to the spo-o-ot where we were goin' to kill it, we had the mages and the mana cannons fire at the tree a-a-all at the same time. The boom was so-o-o great that the Tree was cut down and fell right on that fucker's ba-a-ack!"

"Wo-o-oah!"

Everyone inside the tavern (except Subaru himself) cheered at this great victory. Even Emilia and Betty did, as while they knew how it went from the other participants, Subaru never really described the Whale Subjugation from his perspective in great detail. Also, for once there wasn't much of his usual self-flagellating attitude in his story. Perhaps that was a side effect of his intoxication.

"Ho-o-old! I'm not finished. That didn't kill him, but then the Swo-o-ord Demon reappeared!"

"Oh yeah, the Sword Demon, he's so co-o-o-ol!"

"Ahem! Now 'bout Wilhelm. As you reme-e-ember, he's been down ever since we found a way to get him out of the ma-a-aw of the beast, but we sent him to Felix, ri-i-ight?"

"Ayup, Flugel. You said that."

"Well, I've sent one of the lightly wounded guys back to Felix with the me-e-essage: "Pump Wilhelm with as much healin' ma-a-agic as you can, so he'll be up and runnin'. The-e-en send him to the spot under the Tree". As you kno-o-ow, the Swo-o-ord Demon was our DPS powerhouse. He did the mo-o-ost damage, I mean. So when the killin' blow was ne-e-e-eded, only he could do it. So he went like "I dedicate this to my wi-i-ife, Theresia van Astrea.", which was cool as fu-u-uck by the way, wish I could be that ba-a-adass, and then: Swosh! Swosh! Swosh! – finished off the na-a-asty beast!"

"Damn, that's sick! That knight guy told me 'bout da fallin' off the beast part, but da whole fight comin' from ya sounds even cooler, Flugel!"

"I mean, as I said, I mostly did the alli-i-iance part, the logistics part, the baitin', and the leadership right the-e-ere at the end. Everythin' else was done by the people fightin'. Asi-i-ide from that jumpin' maneuver that caused it to headbutt the ground, I don't think I e-e-even harmed the Whale at a-a-all!"

"You're underselling yourself again, Subaru. You did re-e-eally well…"

"And I just sat there at the manor, doing nothing…"

The early Royal Selection wasn't the best time for Emilia. Frankly, every time she reminded herself of that time, the uncomfortable feelings inside her chest resurfaced. She had let him down, spat in his face when he was troubled and for what? For breaking a promise that she had cruelly forced upon him? For showing genuine concern for her? For standing up for her when even Puck was silent? And when he showed himself to her again, when he saved her again, what did she do? Asked why. Why. Why? Why!? Why did he do that!? He could've just run away with Rem. He said he wanted to do that, didn't he? His love was his answer, but why was she loved? She didn't deserve any love back then. Not for what she had done to him. Frankly, she wasn't worthy of his love even now. Or so she thought.

Unfortunately, Emilia's internal dialogue went unheard, her self-hatred went unnoticed (otherwise, the Sage might have head-butted her in the frustration and told her just how awesome she is).

Ironically enough, Beatrice had the similar thoughts, though they were accompanied by a lot less self-hatred, just pure regret. Arguably one of the biggest regrets in her life (tied with letting Ryuzu Mayer sacrifice herself) was not helping Subaru sooner. The early period of their relationship, when he just arrived at the mansion, was just the two of them bickering all the time. Stupid, very stupid bickering. She wasn't even sure what it was that irked her, but she remembered being so irritated with him back then, so much so that even Roswaal's jabs at her way back when felt insignificant. What was the point of all this? She was one of the first people to notice his obscenely strong spiritual affinity and the rare affinity for Yin magic. She was the first to recognize his damaged mental state. She was one of the first to truly understand the nature of his character, courtesy of the Wolfgarn incident, which revealed his heroic nature.

So what kept her from reaching out for so long? What stupid things did she tell herself to avoid it? "He's not that person"? Why did that even matter? She wanted to be free, so why was she avoiding it?

Meanwhile, Sage's wild tales went on:

"...so, now that the thin' was do-o-one, all we had to do was to slay the Sin Archbi-i-ishop!"

-----

"Ah, shit, Natsuki-kun's gonna go berserk now!"

"Calm down, she-fox, the sun hasn't set yet."

While Subaru was busy partying, the four remaining Royal Candidates gathered at Priscilla's mansion.

"Meanin'?"

"As I was saying, the world works for my benefit…"

"...and your benefit is that Nii-chan wins. We know, bimbo."

"Shut it, slum rat. As I said, the day is not over yet. The Sage will have his last laugh."

"I'm certain he will, Lady Priscilla. I worry what that laugh will be, however."

"Captain Marcos!"

"Oi, you, how did you find our safehouse?"

"Some of my knights told me about your relocation here. However, I'm surprised that both the Sage and his Lover are absent."

"I'm sure Lady Emilia would be outraged by that description."

"I'm just being honest, Lady Crusch. Her Camp is the result of his efforts."

"So what is the meaning of this?"

"Well, as you all know, the Council has issued the counter-ultimatum. And they are clearly in over their heads with this one. I simply chose the winning side."

"How opportunistic of ya."

"Funny to hear that from you, Lady Anastasia."

"Funny indeed. There's only so much wild shit ya can see from da Sage in a day before ya just sorta let it happen, ya know. So what is yo plan?"

"Well, frankly, I want neither a civil war nor a purge in this country. I believe that most, if not all, of his reforms are sound ideas and should be implemented post haste. There are also some on the Council that I've been able to partially sway."

"So you are completely on our side?"

Felt was predictably skeptical. She knew that the Knights weren't particularly trustworthy, bar a few exceptions like Nii-chan or Rein.

"Yes."

"And what can ya offer to us?"

"Well, as most of you probably know, I am in charge of the strongest force here in Lugunica. Most of my Royal Knights can't compete with the First or Second-Class generals of Volcanica, but they are still the most important armed force in this country."

"Yeah, sure. A bunch of useless snobs who can barely guard a bunch of equally snobby nobles. Something that we ve-e-ery much need."

"For once I agree with the slum rat as well."

"I agree too. Our country has grown complacent with the Dragon's generous protection."

"I dunno, some are decent, but yeah, most of them will lose to anyone strong. Like some of my Iron Fang like Ricardo or even da Triplets can probably beat one."

"Royal Candidates, while I can't deny the lack of strength of the average Royal Knight and the frankly obscene corruption in our ranks, it's nonetheless an important political force. It is the reason why I am allowed to the Council meetings and my word is listened to. The Elders can write the orders all they want, but so long as they don't have anything to enforce said orders, it's just a waste of paper."

"So ya're sayin' that by switchin' sides, ya're takin' away their political strength?"

"I can't sway all of them. Of course, some of them are in the pocket of the more conservative elders like Bordeaux, but most of the knights respect me enough to obey such an order. Besides, I believe that Miklotov and his followers will most likely give in soon too."

"Why so?"

"Miklotov's deal is that he wants to maintain the balance, not submit fully. He has played Bordeaux so that they can make the Sage feel that they have considerable influence. He thinks that by feigning strength like that, they can have a balanced government where the Sage acts as honorary leader, while he is the gray eminence who actually pulls the strings. Frankly, I think that this idea was completely idiotic and that he outplayed himself. He might think the same when he finds out I switched sides. And that would be a considerable blow to that opposition."

"So he's the rat?"

"I'd say the fox is the most accurate way to describe him, Lady Felt. As for Bordeaux, he's not really noble-oriented, more like the anti-demi-human-oriented, but many people under him are both. I don't think it's possible to deal with him and the opposition in general, only to outperform them. The tempo is important here, as he will need time to organize the loyal nobility. So far, your side is incredibly far ahead. It was only yesterday that we learned of the Sage's activities, and today you have arrived in full force to make the demands. That's incredibly fast, so fast that the Elders are scrambling for options. All in all, I think just a one big commoner rally at the palace would be enough to topple them. But this position is also very vulnerable. Should the populace become aware of some of the unsightly details about the Sage…"

"Thankfully, Natsuki-kun doesn't have any unsightly details…"

The sarcasm in the Merchant Princess' words was obvious.

"Pha-ha-ha-ha! He really does not!"

The Sun Princess nearly collapsed from the sudden fit of laughter. Unfortunately, she was the only one who found it funny.

"Yeah... How are we supposed to explain that part about Nii-chan?"

"Well, it would make his claim shaky, I guess. Still Subaru-sama might still prevail."

"Ah, so he has the unsightly details."

"You have no idea. Don't worry though, it's not about the little children."

"Oh, I assumed his title…"

"Nope, Nii-chan is wholesome, it's just that his love life is kinda fucked up."

"Some unfortunate affair?"

"I mean, you could call it that. But you haven't heard anything from us, should the things go well, it would not be a problem."

-----

"One mo-o-ore, Vik!"

"Ahem, Sir Subaru, as I said, we have run out of drinks."

"Argh, no more whiskey?!"

"No."

"Wine?"

"No, Sir Reid."

"Be-e-e-er?"

"No."

"Mead?"

"No, Lady Emi-… Actually, there is one last bottle here."

"Ya-a-ay! Hic! More Sunset!"

Needless to say, Emilia went overboard, even with the Sage's assistance.

"Okay, three mo-o-ore Sunsets for us!"

They were the last people to leave the tavern, as everyone else lost the many drinking contests that Emilia's knight effortlessly crushed.

"Three more Sunsets coming up."

"Is there any more sweets, bartender? Betty needs more sugar, I suppose."

"There are some left, Lady Beatrice."

"I liked the ones with the purple frosting, in fact, can you bring some?"

"Of course, Lady Beatrice."

Both the sweets and the drinks were brought and consumed rather quickly. With that:

"Alright, how mu-u-uch has all thi-i-is cost me?"

"Well, twenty-four bottles of wine and three kegs of beer for the Sword Saint, that's three gold, seven silver, and five copper coins; twenty-six bottles of wine, seven kegs of beer, and six barrels of whiskey for you, Sir Subaru, that's five gold, nine silver, and two copper coins; six bottles of mead for Lady Emilia for the five silver and four copper; and four kilos of assorted sweets and nine cups of tea for Lady Beatrice for eight silver and three copper. Finally, the furniture: two gold and four silver exactly for the broken table and two chairs. The total is… ahem..."

"Bam! The-e-ere's your coin."

Before Viktor could do the math (in his defense, it was the largest order he had ever served in his pub), the Sage placed three coins on the table. But not just some coppers: three holy gold coins.

"Sir Subaru, that's too much! Your total is…"

"Nah, I wo-o-on't hear it. That was some ama-a-azin' service, and you have to pay the ma-a-aids extra, they look really ti-i-ired."

"Subaru, where did you get so many-... Hic! I mean, so much money?"

"It's the profit from the ma-a-ayo patent! I swear, mayonnaise is liquid go-o-old! That's just like a mo-o-onth's worth. I can buy my own little ma-a-ansion by now. Just from ma-a-ayo profits!"

"Wow, I never knew you are so rich!"

"Yeah, we need to bring some more cool shit here like trains, or like jets, or electricity…"

"We'll do that, Flugel. Ya gonna be da Big Boss."

"Aye, gonna build my own Yakuza and shit. That would be sick! Or, you know, I can just make my own little paradise in Kararagi…"

In two separate universes, two black-haired boys sneezed at the same time.

"I swear someone cursed me! Urgh, should I trust Puck to check? No, he's gray, everyone's so gray. Can't trust, can't trust, can't trust!"

"Ah, hell, it's getting cold. Need to get back to Rigel and Spica."

-----

"Alright, time to go. See you around, Vik. Astral walk!"

Suddenly, four of Vik's last customers disappeared into nothingness. The old man still couldn't believe his luck. As the three coins shimmered in his hand, his thoughts about this lucky evening were:

"Damn, I wish I had a drink too. Well, good luck, Natsuki Subaru."

Chapter Text

In an instant, the world around Emilia was covered in a purple haze. Visibility was rather poor, but she could still make out the fine details of the tavern they were in if she squinted.

“Woah, this is re-e-eally cool! Hic! So that’s how this shadouwolking spell works like from the inside. A-a-awesome!”

“Shadow walkin'. Tella said I ca-a-alled it Astral Walk before, so we went with tha-a-at name.”

“Right, right. So no one... Hic! ...no one sees us at all?”

Without even looking in the direction of her knight, who corrected her prior misspell, Emilia began waving her hands in front of the bartender, trying to get his attention. Predictably, there was no reaction.

“As you can see, girl, the spell of Absolute Obstruction makes you completely unperceivable, in fact.”

“Astral Walk, use its original name, Betty.”

“I will not, half-elf. Absolute Obstruction sounds more refined, in fact!”

“Even though it's technically wrong?”

“Yes.”

“Well, Tella is correct, it is a Separation magic. It’s like a partial Al Shamak. Only there's still a thin link between the two worlds.”

“Betty still prefers her own name, humph!”

“Cool! So, Subaru, how did you… Gr-r-r-r-r!!!”

Emilia wanted to inquire further, but suddenly something else just caught her attention. As she finally turned her eyes in the direction of her knight, she noticed something outrageous. That was the reason for her sudden growl.

“Ur-r-rgh! Get off him!”

Just behind the Sage stood his infamous patron, a silver-haired half-elf in a black dress. But that wasn’t what caused the Royal Candidate's sudden tantrum, she was aware that Satella had been there before. No, it was the fact that she rested her head on his shoulder and tightly wrapped her arms around his torso with a satisfied grin.

“Emilia-tan, why are you so ma-a-ad?”

She wasn’t certain why either, but she was indeed mad. Very much so. The alcohol in her system urged her to start a fight for the attention of her knight. Fortunately, there were two reasons why she did not actually start a scuffle with her counterpart: the first was that even though she was completely hammered, she still had some survival instinct, Satella was still one of the strongest beings in existence after all. As for the second one, well, Subaru was in between the two half-elves, acting as a human shield. So instead of targeting the so-called the Witch of Envy, Emilia’s attention was turned to her knight instead:

“Subaru-u-u!”

In frustration, she weakly struck him in his chest. That is to say, weakly for her, Subaru clearly felt that she had miscalculated her half-elven strength.

“Urgh… Ouch... That hurts… What for, Emilia-tan?”

Poor Sage almost bent in half from the force of the blow.

“That’s… that’s for the missed date... Hic! ...You dunderhead! Always, breaking promises… Gr-r-r!”

Subaru would have found the pout cute if he hadn't been struggling to breathe.

“No one says that… Urgh! *coughs* Hard to breathe.”

“Oh no, was it too hard? Hang on.”

It took her a bit to realize her error. Unfortunately, Emilia’s reaction to that error made things worse. Instinctively, she lunged forward to check on him, however she clearly miscalculated again and forgot to stop, instead crashing into him with full force. Subaru, on the other hand, wasn't in the best shape right now and could not stop her. Thus, in just the same way like in one of those collapsing works of art made of mahjong or domino pieces, where even one unbalanced piece could topple the whole composition, Emilia's haste caused everyone in the Sage's crew to stumble (except Reid, who was standing separately nearby): Emilia crashed face-first into Subaru, causing him to fall, which led to Satella behind him and Beatrice beside of him to fall as well.

“O-o-off!”

Needless to say, the position in which the two half-elves and their lover found themselves in was rather scandalous.

“Hah, she’s just like Tella that time in Priestella when we almost flooded da place! Oi, Flugel, ya lucky bastard! Gettin' double-teamed by two hotties like that! We need to find a place for da three of ya... actually, let’s go grab that Oni-chick as well. Ha-ha!

“Stop giving them ideas! Betty won’t go looking for some brothel!”

“He-he, ‘lright, let them do it here and now then, just ask Flugel to eject us both out, while this half-elf sandwich gets it on! Or maybe I should say SandWitch! Ha-ha… You get it? It’s coz Witch and Sandwi-…”

“Yes, we do get the pun, in fact! It’s terrible, I suppose! Help Betty’s Subaru instead!”

Beatrice was the first one to stand back up.

“How? Get with them? They seem comfortable enough without me! And Flugel doesn’t share his girlfriends, you know.”

“Urgh! Stop playing around, Stick Swinger!”

“Tella, Emilia, can you two get o-o-off? I'm havin' ve-e-ery mixed feelings about what's happenin' right now!”

This was the most compromising position he could think of. Emilia was right on top of him, giving him the most unintentionally erotic view possible (arguably, the fact that Emilia had zero lewd intentions was what made it even more erotic), while the touch-starved Satella molested him from the behind, acting as a large spoon. To say that this was an arousing experience would be a ginormous understatement (in fact, Subaru rather quickly lost control of his rising beacon of masculinity, not that the Royal Candidate ever noticed that). Subaru was so distracted by the two that even the pain in his lungs from the previous blow faded. And worst of all, their answers to his pleas:

“Just a few minutes, dear. Pretty ple-e-ease?”

“No, you owe me an apology hug, nincompoop.”

So it took a while. Emilia got extremely competitive and pressed pretty much her whole body against him, all the while whispering some really outdated insults (aside from two of her common ones) into his ear, including chucklehead, fop-doodle, nigmenog, and even wrinkler. Scandalous! Still, it was still incredibly arousing because her tone was full of deep affection. Tella wasn’t far behind - her hands (including shadow ones) ran all over his body, giving him the greatest semi-erotic massage the Sage had ever had (though he hadn't had one before, unless you count the Witch caressing his heart or consuming him in that one Sanctuary loop as a massage). Subaru couldn’t do anything since he was stuck between a hammer and an anvil, and a very soft hammer and anvil at that. Involuntarily, a certain lewd image appeared in his mind. It was an image of a scene from one of the spicy videos that he had watched back at home: when the naked girl in a crowd of guys had a dozen or so hands fondling her body. Except now he was the girl in question. All in all, it was a strange experience: sure, it was incredibly sensual and comfortable, but horny thoughts never left his mind, no matter how hard he tried to shake them off, and that also filled him with immense shame. Stuck between his immense Lust and his incredible Chastity (and literally stuck as well), he did not know what to do.

Eventually, one of them was satisfied:

“Alright, I’m sated for now.”

Satella ended her molestations by affectionately patting her lover’s head and kissing his temple, then she quickly crawled out from under them, using her shadow hands to first lift and then lower them to the ground. Emilia quickly took note and began to pat his head, and kiss his face as well.

“Emilia-tan, Tella has stopped, now you please.”

“No!”

“Emilia-tan, please, this is to-o-o-o much for my weak heart!”

"She's been clinging to you all this time, hasn't she?! I need a… Hic! ...compensation!”

“Sigh, okay. But just a fe-e-ew more minutes.”

“Mhm, a few more minutes.”

Thankfully, it was indeed only a few more minutes until she finally got off him. And when she did:

“Betty’s Subaru is one hell of a pervert, I suppose. Get your mind out of the gutter.”

Beatrice nodded into the direction of the bulge in Subaru’s pants. A rather impressive one at that, in Satella's opinion. That caused Subaru to quickly cover it up.

“Hey, I was li-i-iterally molested by the two girls I’m into! If tha-a-at wasn’t the time to become… ready, I don’t know when it is!”

“Subaru, what is tha-..?”

“No-o-ope. Now’s no-o-ot the time to give you a sex-ed, Emilia-tan, espe-e-ecially after what just happened. No deaths by Snu-Snu for me toda-a-ay!” “That would be the best check point I ever had though.”

"Te-he-he-he-he!"

Satella couldn’t help but to snicker. She was sure that if that was going to happen (which she would like very much), they'd be the first to run out of stamina.

“Oi, Flugel, ya really should. She’d be a big freak in bed just like Tella, no doubt ‘bout it.”

“Sigh, lets go already, I suppose, we can’t maintain Astral Walk forever, in fact!”

“Sure-sure.”

“Ehm, right. Hic! I wanted to ask: Subaru, how did you manage to get it to work?”

“Betty’s Subaru is just that exceptional, in fact. He aced it."

“Oh, well, Emilia-tan, it went kinda like this:”

-----

Some time ago.

“Argh! Fuck, shit, fuck! Fuck! Argh!”

“Calm down, in fact. Your noisy temper tantrums are interfering with the mana! It hurts Betty!”

Previously, Subaru hadn't been aware of the effect that his Authority had on his companion. In fact, his anger was so great that he was barely felt the world around him shake. In the end, it was the realization of the consequences of his tantrums that finally stiffened his anger.

With that, the trembling in the air stopped just as quickly as it had begun. The knight standing guard looked terrified. His weapon had long since fallen to the floor, and he sat slumped on the ground, eyes wide.

“Betty extends the apologies for her contractor’s vile behavior. He can not control his emotions.”

“Oh… sure… no need to apologize.”

Noticing the dropped weapon, the guard quickly picked it up and got straight back up.

“Urgh!”

With that final grunt, the last vestiges of Subaru’s anger were gone too.

“Tella, so can you show me that shadow walking spell?”

"Do you want some time alone?"

“Yeah.”

"Well, since we were the ones who developed it, it should be easy for you. You will have to use Betty’s gate or transform into someone who can cast it.”

“Not a problem. Cor Leonis.”

He quickly linked himself, Beatrice, and Satella in order to share mana.

“Alright, concentrate. Feel the mana inside our bodies and gently guide it through Betty’s gate. Just like usual. Good! Now the difficult part, the spell matrix: feel the surrounding world around you. Got it? Now choose a piece of it around us. And now push it away. Just a tiny bit, not enough to separate it completely. Great! I can already see the extension of it. Now shift its properties, hide it from the rest of the world while giving us a little peek, you do it the same way you would cast Shamak. And release the matrix. There, wonderful! Now all you have to do is cross the boundary yourself, it shouldn't be too difficult."

“Wah! What is this, in fact?”

“Yay! You did it, dear!”

“Honestly, that wasn’t too difficult.”

“Is this the obstruction spell that Betty’s Subaru asked you to use back then, I suppose?”

“Yes. Well, obstruction is not the correct way to describe it. It’s close to separation – a variation of Shamak. We called it Astral Walk.”

“Ah, I see. Interesting. So the border is…”

“Paper thin, you could cross in and out. But you have to know where to go. So also quite private too."

“An ingenious design. Subaru’s aptitude is extraordinary, in fact!”

“So completely invisible, but is it silent? Oi, guard, can you hear me?”

The aforementioned guard was still looking around, clearly wondering where the two of them had gone to.

“It also separates physically. You can walk through objects.”

“Wait, really? Fuck, that’s awesome! Honestly, Beako, we should’ve spent time developing this!”

“E.M.T. and E.M.M. are still rather impressive, in fact. Those two are more useful, I suppose."

“Yeah, they are, but I still think we are wasting time with E.M.F.”

“Don’t give up. We will figure it out. E.M.T. and E.M.M. were you redoing your past progress, I suppose, since your girlfriend is aware of them, but E.M.F. will be revolutionary, in fact!”

E.M.F. was the third special spell that he and Beatrice were developing.

“Mhm, don’t give up, love.”

"Well, we'll take another look at that after I deal with all this chaos. Right now, I just want to walk around for a while."

-----

“So that’s ro-o-oughly how it went.”

“Yes, Subaru just somehow managed it on the first try, I suppose. Betty has no idea why. Maybe it's because he was threading on the same ground.”

“He’s very smart.”

“Aye-aye, Flugel is a smart fella. But like subtle smart.”

Reid and Satella nodded in agreement. The latter wanted to reach out and pet him, but the Sage deftly dogged the attempt.

“Tella, no gettin' handsy. Emilia-tan is fumin' alre-e-eady. One catfight is eno-o-ough.”

“I’m not fuming! Hic!”

“Then why there’s a po-o-out on your pretty fa-a-ace?”

“Urgh! You are very smart, Subaru. One of the smartest people I know.”

“Wo-o-ow, where did that come from?”

“Dunderhead!”

“No one says tha-a-at anymore. Besi-i-ides, isn't it a little weird to call someone an idiot ri-i-ight after callin' them smart?"

“Gr-r-r!”

“Enough flirting already, I suppose!”

-----

Finally, the Sage’s current partners in crime left the Scarlet Maiden. But soon after more complications arose.

“Subaru?”

“What is it?”

“M-m-m...”

“You can spe-e-eak freely, Emilia-tan.”

“It is… private…”

“'lright, then whisper it into my e-e-ear.”

“*whispering*”

“Oh, that’s not a problem at a-a-all! Just return back to the Scarlet Ma-a-aiden!”

“It would be so embarrassing to tell Vik... Can’t we... Hic! ...both sneak in?”

“Emilia-tan, I won’t fo-o-ollow you there!”

“Why?”

“Why do you even ask that question?! Of course I wo-o-on’t! Sigh, there’s another tavern over there too. Go the-e-ere then if you are that afraid of Vik”

“But...”

“No buts. He-he, butts.”

“There’s an alley there…”

“No-o-o! That’s na-a-aughty, Emilia-tan! Imagine the rumors if someone sees you! Just go to that tavern over the-e-ere. Here’s a few silver, just in case the owner asks for pa-a-ayment.”

“Urgh, okay, Subaru.”

After some grumbling, Emilia conceded. And with that, the Half-elf Royal Candidate temporarily exited the Astral Walk and left the quintet (now the quartet).

“What’s goin' on?”

“Uh, don’t laugh, just bla-a-adder problems."

Surprisingly, no one did.

“I mean, makes sense. Da girl had drunk a few bottles. Unlike da two of us, she didn't go to da restroom. Besides, she’s a casual drinker.”

"By the way, how were you two able to drink so much, in fact? Betty, had never seen anything like that before, I suppose."

“Oh, that’s just da Flow Technique, only aimed at da liver. We called it Drunkard’s Endurance! I taught it to him on our first journey, but he got so good that he actually surpassed me!”

“That’s because I’m a-a-awesome!”

“That ya are! Da fuckin' coolest guy in da world! Let’s drink to that.”

“Drinks are gone, Reid.”

“Oh, that’s right, Tella. Well, let’s grab some of Flugel’s stuff when we get back!”

“Aye, let’s do tha-a-at, bro! Hm… wait….”

Suddenly, Subaru had a inkling that something important was nearby. He began to look around until he finally found the source of it.

“Wait, see that girl over the-e-ere?”

That inkling turned out to be a little girl in trouble.

“Ah, shit, da Lolimancer is back in action again…”

“He-he. Let him do his thing, Reid.”

“Come on, guys, she seems lost.”

With that, Subaru dismissed Astral Walk, leaving only his patron hidden, and went straight to the tearful child.

“Oi, I remember that gi-i-irl! That’s… Plum… I think that was her na-a-ame… Da-a-amn, that makes me…”

“Nostalgic?”

“Yeah, in a bittersweet wa-a-ay. A trace of my old innocence. He-e-ey there!”

“Oh, hello, Mister! Wait, mother told me not to talk to strangers, right. My name is not Plum, and I’m definitely not lost.”

Plum made sure they got the false information, just like her mother told her to do in case a stranger began asking her questions. She did a good job of it. Obviously.

“Heh. Well, yeah, you really shouldn’t ta-a-alk to strangers, good parentin' there. But I’m not a stra-a-anger... eh... I guess I kinda am... in thi-i-is time… but like I more of an acquaintance by proxy!”

“Proxy?”

“It’s when you don’t actually know the pe-e-erson, but has the one who do-o-oes. He-e-ence, acquaintance by proxy.”

“You do know someone that I know?”

The little girl, too fascinated by Subaru's innate charm (the amazing Authority of Lolimancy), didn't even notice that he was terribly drunk.

“Your mo-o-o-other and your fa-a-ather. Your mom's a housewife and your dad's a fru-u-uit seller, right?”

“Yes. So are you a friend?”

“That I a-a-am. And you are cle-e-early lost. By the wa-a-ay, who lets their child out at night?"

“Mom is busy cooking, she told me to hang out near the home, but there was a shiny blob that was wandering around the place and I followed it and then I got lost.”

“Hu-u-uh, it might be one of the Emilia’s spirits. She said she scattered them around the ci-i-ity. We-e-ell, let’s find your father, then. I know where his stall is. But fi-i-irst, do you want to see somethin' cool?”

“Cool?”

“Here’s a grove-edged… Wa-a-ait, actually, that’s just a normal coin, huh. I didn’t bring the ones from home he-e-ere... We-e-ell, this one would do too, because it’s a Magical Sage Coin!”

“Really?”

“Yeah, look, it has the Sage on it, that's me by the way. Looks ki-i-inda weird, though, not like I look at all… A-a-anyway, look, it jumps aro-o-ound! Look, now it's in my hand. And now, after we give it a sha-a-ake…”

He closed his fist and the opened it again.

“And it’s gone!”

“Oh! It’s really gone!”

“Where did it go to, Subaru? Is it really magical, in fact?”

Beatrice thought the Al Shamak had been used to hide the coin, but there were clearly no mana disturbances associated with Subaru casting through her gate. So was it really a magical metia?

“He-he, even Betty is surprised by that one, love.”

“Ha-ha, ri-i-ight. It really i-i-is magical, Beako! Here it is!”

Suddenly he pulled it out of Plum’s hair.

“O-o-oh! So co-o-ol!”

“But it doesn’t just jump aro-o-ound, Beako. No! It also duplicates!”

Suddenly he pulled the second one out of Beatrice’s drills.

“Okay, now that one I did not expect.”

“I’m improvin' my tri-i-icks, Tella-tan. You can each have one. But you have to be ve-e-ery special to activate the jumpin' ability, so tra-a-ain hard, and one day you can do it.”

“Betty can do it already, in fact. Al Shamak.”

Her coin vanished only to reappear a few seconds latter in Subaru’s open hand. While the spell was costly in terms of mana, simply hiding a coin in another dimension wasn't as taxing as one might think.

“E-e-ey, you got it, Beako. But you, Plum, have to learn magic to do somethin' like tha-a-at.”

“I will, Mister!”

“Subaru, ju-u-ust Subaru. Take my hand, let’s get you to your fa-a-ather.”

“And da loli is manced, he-he. New record, Flugel?”

-----

Meanwhile.

“Sneaky-sneak. Hic!”

Although Emilia listened to Subaru's suggestion, she didn't want to pay. Her first reason was that it would be wasteful to rent a room just to use the toilet once. As for the second reason, it would still be incredibly embarrassing. That’s why she was so incredibly stealthy. Absolutely invisible. And silent. Definitely.

In reality, of course, she wasn't, it was just that the only person in the main hall of the tavern, the owner, knew better than to ask questions of the Witch’s lookalike. The place was completely empty, most of his usual clients had gone to the neighboring watering hole today for some reason. Well, shit happens, it wasn’t the first time he was running it at a loss.

Eventually, after some very stealthy search, Emilia found the lavatory, did the deed, and equally stealthily (not really) left the place. She was about to loudly announce that, however:

“Urgh, where did Subaru go?”

-----

“Gr-r-r! There you are! Hic! Always running off somewhere, always causing trouble! Hic! Dunderhead!”

“Hi there, Miss! I remember you!”

The little girl was the first one to notice the approaching Royal Candidate.

“Oh, you’ve located us, Emilia-tan! I’d figured you will after findin' this little gu-u-uy.”

In her knight's hands, a small floating bulb of light shone softly. This spirit was how they were located.

“Why do you always ditch me, urgh!”

“So-o-orry, Emilia-tan, but we were only two streets aw-a-a-ay. Had to rescue this little tro-o-oublemaker.”

“That she is. No doubt you had your mom so worried with your antics. Oi, miss, by the way, weren’t you just over there?”

The fruit vendor pointed to the empty side of the Sage.

“Eh, no… Hu-u-uh?”

“I swear I saw you right over there in a black dress. I remember a year ago, when you rescued my daughter the first time, you were wearing the same clothes you are now. I thought it was weird to change your style all of a sudden.”

“The fuck you are talkin' 'bout, Kadomon? Emilia-tan a-a-always wears white and purple! Black and yellow is my thin'!”

The Sage’s group could hear someone snickering next to them.

“Strange… Plum, dear, have you seen another white-haired lady with purple eyes like this one?”

“No, Papa.”

“Well, either way, thanks for rescuing my daughter again. That was one unlucky day. Bloody Dragons and the news of the Priestella disaster got all the people scared, so I got almost no clients, and the damn quake ruined a quarter of my goods. At least my darling daughter is safe.”

“Betty wonders what is the reason for all of this bad luck, I suppose...”

“Heh, no idea, Beako. ‘lright, have a good night, Appa Guy!”

“Good luck to you too, kid.”

With that, the unlucky fruit seller and his daughter departed.

-----

And so the crew continued on. The streets were empty. Satella grew less weary of being found, and shifted the spell matrix a bit, to the point where she was fully visible (and audible) to the members of the crew. As for the outsiders, if they had looked at the living calamity, they would have seen only a moving veil of shadows that followed the Great Sage wherever he went.

“He-he. Got him! He had no idea.”

The Sage’s eternal companion continued to snicker, nay, to cackle (like a Witch). It was rather unlike her usual melancholic self.

“Tella-tan, why did you confu-u-use the poor old guy? He already had eno-o-ough bullshit for today.”

“I thought it’d be funny.”

“I mean, it was kinda funny tho, Flugel.”

“Betty agrees, if Satella had worn the same clothes, they would look almost the same, I suppose.”

“So next time I should take her clothes?”

“Aye-aye, Tella.”

"I'm not giving you my clothes!"

“Can’t Rem just make a duplicate? She did that with my tracksuit.”

“Sigh, you can copy them… but no wearing them all day or trying to deceive my… Hic! ...knight. It would be so weird if…”

Emilia’s mind already conjured up the image of Satella making out with her knight while dressed as her. To be fair, Satella had conjured up that image before too. Quite a couple of times, actually.

“Hah, I don’t think Tella can pull you off, Emilia-tan. Te-e-ella is Te-e-ella and yo-o-ou are yo-o-ou. I'll never confuse you two!"

“M-m-m, okay. I trust you, Subaru.”

“Too easy.”

“Yep, ya right, Ankle-Biter, this lass is way too easy to fool and appease.”

“Huh, who are you two talking about?”

“No one, Emilia-tan.”

Emilia became even more confused by this exchange, but was too distracted by Subaru’s head-pats to inquire further.

“So, where to next, love?”

“Well, I'm feelin' ki-i-inda nostalgic after meetin' the Appa Guy, so let’s just visit some cool old places.”

-----

Their next destination was the alleyway where the fated meeting between the Sage and his Mistress took place. Or so he told.

“...And then, when all hope seemed lost, that’s when I he-e-eard it: “That’s enough, villains!”, and at that mo-o-oment I realized...”

“You shouldn’t do that.”

“Oh!”

The sensation of frozen time suddenly hit the Sage. He immediately turned to the woman in black.

“But they don’t beli-i-ieve me, Tella-tan. They think it's just some more of my drunken ramblings."

“Still, please don’t mention things from the dead ends without a reason. Wrangling the Envy is very difficult.”

“I’m surprised you are holdin' out for so lo-o-ong, Tella.”

“I am too, your presence helps a lot, just please… Don’t.”

“Oka-a-ay, I’ll just play it off.”

The time resumed.

“… realized that I’m…”

“That’s not how it happened! Hic! We didn’t even meet until the fight with Elsa!”

“Well, that’s just what this place evokes in me. Even if it is just some random dingy alley. That’s how I would’ve written it in my memoirs!”

“But that’s all false!”

“Yet so theatrical! A kind-hearted young wo-o-oman conquers a young man's heart by showin' ki-i-indness at the exact time he was in need of it, thu-u-us earnin' his undyin' loyalty!”

“Urgh, Subaru, stop playing around...”

“Heh, 'lright, 'lright, there are two more places that I want to visit.”

-----

“And this the place where are I started from ze-e-ero.”

“From zero? What do you mean? You never told Betty anything about this place, in fact.”

“Oh, we-e-ell, that story goes back to the early Royal Selection, right after the scuffle with Julius…”

"Oh, no..."

…

…

…

“...And we-e-ell, you know, after someone pushes you forward like tha-a-at, after that someone gives you a path to walk, te-e-ells you that you are a hero in her eyes, how could you not fall in love with that so-o-omeone? That’s how I fell in love with Rem, despi-i-ite all of her issues.”

“Subaru, I’m sorry… I never apologized…”

“For what?”

"For leaving you here! Hic! I told you not to return and…”

“Nah, Emilia-tan, I absolutely dese-e-erved that kind of treatment back then.”

“No, you didn’t, I was the one re- Hic!” “-sponsible”

“Nope, I take one hu-u-undred percent of the responsibility for our fight back the-e-en. No arguin'.”

“But…”

“No buts.”

“Dunderhead.”

“Emilia-tan, come o-o-on, let me be a gentleman.”

“Nincompoop.”

“No one says either of…”

“Muffin-head.”

“A-a-alright, let’s drop this argument befo-o-ore you exhaust your poor insult vocabulary, Emilia-tan.”

“Chucklehead.”

“...”

“Zounderkite.”

“...”

“Lubberwort.”

“...”

-----

Eventually, Emilia’s knowledge of old, obscure insults has finally run out. At the same time, they have also reached their last destination.

“And we’re here. The legendary Lo-o-o-ot House, what’s left of it.”

“Damn, they still haven’t repaired it?”

“I mean, that makes sense, gi-i-iven the condition of the rest of the Slums, Emilia-tan.”

“Looks like all the loot is gone too. Some scavengers picked da place.”

“Pro-o-obably not, Reid. More likely old man Rom just cleaned it all out himself."

“Guess so, Flugel. Now what’s da story with this place?”

“Oh, that’s the place where our resolve was fi-i-irst tasted. It all happened…”

“Let me tell this one, Subaru.”

“Oh, okay, why the enthu-u-usiasm?”

“I need to tell the truth, otherwise you're gonna tell your tall tales again! Hic! That’s how the things really went here…”

…

…

…

Emilia managed to make a decent summary of the events despite the jumbled speech and the constant hiccups.

“...And then, when I thought he… Hic! ...was going to ask something mean or naughty, he just said: “I want you to tell me your name.” in that silly voice of his.”

“Hey, it wasn’t silly at a-a-all! That was “Subaru, the he-e-eartbreaker” voice!”

“It was pretty silly.”

“I know, right! Re-e-eally silly.”

The two half-elves showed surprising unity in this assessment. Although they both found the voice equally cute.

“God dammit, I thought that was co-o-ool...”

“It was… Hic! I don't mean the voice, just the words themselves. He explained the reasoning to me later, but honestly, I still don't understand why you just asked for my name and nothing else."

"I mean, would you give your real name to so-o-omeone who just came up to you and said he wa-a-anted to help you find your insi-i-ignia?"

She paused, for a second, she wanted to answer “Yes” right away, but then she started to hesitate – if Subaru had approached her earlier, would she trust him? Would she even want for him to get into trouble with her? Probably not.

“Se-e-e-e? That’s what I am talkin' about.”

Of course, Subaru had already experienced that in his first try of this fateful day.

“I guess I would not. But that’s not really the point. Hic! In that moment, when you simply gave your name and asked for mine, despite all the prejudices associated with my kind, I… I felt a real connection with some- Hic! ...someone, the second one I had after Puck. I felt like I could trust you… no matter what would’ve happened afterwards. I felt like I could open up to you and you would listen. I felt like I could spend time with you just talk- Hic! ...talking about things like a normal person, not a reviled pariah. I felt like I could always be with you, in sadness and in happiness... I felt like I could have a great time with you, in short. It changed me… well, started to change me..."

Satella, Reid and Beatrice immediately noticed a sudden shift in the atmosphere as Emilia rambled on. You could say that there was love in the air. However, the two love-struck idiots did not even realize it themselves. Emilia was unaware of just how close she was to the confession that she desperately wanted to make, courtesy of being terribly drunk, as for Subaru, he was basically in the adoration phase right now, simply fawning over how adorable Emilia’s speech was without paying attention to the unintended hidden context these words had. After all, he was somewhat used to the friend-zone (and “maybe something more, but I am not sure”-zone) that Emilia had left him in.

“...And then we’ve noticed that you were hurt and…”

Just like that, Emilia’s emotional state turned on his head once again. Suddenly, tears sprang from her eyelids. Subaru was quick to notice and pulled her close to him.

“I was so *sniff* scared that you were going to die! I was so desperate to *sniff* heal you! I thought I was so cursed that I couldn't have anyone like you, that it was my fate to ruin everything I touch! *sniff* I poured all my remaining mana in order to save him!”

“Don’t be so overly dramatic, I suppose. You only stabilized him by stopping the bleeding and healed the surface wound. Betty had to do all the hard work, in fact! Also, you had to use your contracted spirits for this feat. Your own healing abilities are practically non-existent.”

“I couldn’t! I wish *sniff* I was as good at healing as Beatrice, Garfiel or as Felix, but I’m not.”

“Nah, you are good eno-o-ough, Emilia-tan.”

“Did I do good *sniff*, Subaru?”

The tearful girl resting on his chest desperately sought his approval.

“Yep, you did go-o-o-od. I would’ve died if not for you.” “Honestly, it would have been frustrating to redo it again."

His hand began to gently stroke her head again. Before long Emilia began to doze off.

“Da-a-amn, drunken Emilia is so-o-o cute. This ki-i-inda reminds me of the King Game and the Flanel Fruit incident.”

“What happened?”

"Oh, we were ju-u-ust playin' a "drunken party" type game (except we weren't dru-u-unk) and Emilia accidentally got dru-u-ugged. We-e-ell, Rem tried to feed it to me, but Emilia-tan, in her ama-a-azin' innocence, took the hit. She was ve-e-ery... childish, ve-e-ery pure at the time."

“Your king tasks were outrageous, in fact!”

“Hey, Beako, it’s not my fault that we were gettin' each other all the ti-i-ime! I was targetin' Emilia prima-a-arily, maybe Ram and Rem second.”

“Pervert.”

“No-no-no-no-no. Not tha-a-at type of Lolimancer! No wa-a-ay I’m ever going to touch a kid inappropriately. Don’t you reme-e-ember how frustrated I was at even gettin' you?”

“That is true, I suppose…”

While the Sage and his spirit bantered, another half-elf suddenly joined Emilia.

“Tella-tan?”

“You know, I worry about you too… And, well, Envy is getting jealous.”

The last thing was not true, although Envy did rumble a bit, it was nothing that Satella could not handle. In reality, she just wanted more affection.

“Oh, sure thin', he-e-ere.”

To make it fair, he placed Satella’s head on his other pectoral, just a few centimeters away from Emilia. Both of his hands had to be used for the head-patting part to ensure the satisfaction of both.

“Damn, Flugel's out here living his best life! And that’s just da first half of his harem.”

“I’m not makin' a ha-a-arem, dude. It’s just… my love life is fu-u-ucked up…”

“Ya say that like ya don’t enjoy havin' two of those hotties on yo chest? Like ya never thought about havin' a threesome with them? Or maybe even a fivesome with Oni-chick and Scorpio-chick?”

“I mean… Well... Fuck, I have no co-o-omeback for tha-a-at.”

“Heh. Told ya.”

And then it got even worse:

“Ah!”

His patron moaned briefly when Subaru accidentally brushed her ear.

“Tella-tan?”

“No-no-no, don’t pull the hand back. Keep going!”

The Sage hesitantly obeyed his lover's order.

"Tella-ta-a-an, do you get off on ear-touchin'?"

“It’s an erogenous zone.”

“Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait. Is that a universal thin'? An e-e-elf thin'? Or just your thin'?”

“An elf and half-elf thing. Ears, and especially eartips, are very sensitive for our kind.”

“O-o-oh… That’s why Emilia always felt a bit fu-u-uzzy after I accidentally touched them a couple of times while I was doin' her ha-a-air, huh?"

“It is re-e-eally pleasant, but a little strange feeling.”

The half-asleep half-elf whispered to her knight.

“The ears of most demi-humans are much more developed than those of normal humans, in fact. But that’s also the point of vulnerability, I suppose.”

“Wa-a-ait, how do you even know that, Beako?”

“”Notes on Anatomical Structure of Various Races”, Kairo Devan. Mother left a lot of books like that, in fact.”

“Huh, not a smut book? I tho-o-ought you'd find somethin' like that in “Promi-i-iscuous Elven Maid and Her Perverted Human Ma-a-aster.””

"There is no such book!"

“Yeah, sure, Beako, the smut connoisseur.”

“Urgh!”

“M-m-m.” “M-m-m...”

Without even realizing it, the Sage intensified the assault on Satella’s ears even further and even began to brush Emilia’s as well, eliciting more satisfied sighs from both of them.

“I mean, to be fair, Tella’s a big freak when it comes to everythin' ya do to her. Ya once said that she likes to have her ears bitten whilst being railed by ya. I tried that too, but da chick I was poundin' at da time started screamin' and ran away."

“Reid, you were not supposed to… M-m-m… not supposed to actually bite the ear. Just nibble on it a little bit during particularly passionate moments."

“O-o-oh… Flugel, why da fuck ya didn’t tell me that?”

“He-e-ey, I don’t remember even tellin' that! Besides, who the fu-u-uck in their right mind tries to bite someone's e-e-ear off?”

"You are all impossible, in fact! Stop all this disgusting bedroom talk right now! What happened to all of you today?!"

“Huh, come to thi-i-ink of it, this evenin' is particularly horny. What, did Vik mixed aphrodi-i-isiac in our drinks? What an old horndog! Or is it just the a-a-alcohol?”

“I am not drunk though, love.”

“Don’t the three mugs of be-e-e-er I brought you count?”

Back at the Scarlet Maiden, Subaru sneakily passed a couple of mugs to his invisible patron at her request. So she was definitely under the influence, though not as much as Emilia.

“No-o-ope, definitely not drunk, just a bit tipsy.”

To be fair, her speech was relatively normal. Her upbeat and vulgar behavior, however, was not.

“Well, you bein' ve-e-ery freaky honestly sounds normal, Tella-tan. I don’t think alcohol even did a-a-anythin' to you."

“Gr-r-r, I’m not freaky… Well, may be a little freaky. In healthy doses.”

“After four hundred years of abstinence? In healthy doses? Really? I’m honestly surprised ya haven't raped him yet, Tella.”

“I would never, Reid… Well, unless he consents…”

“Then it’s not rape by defini-i-ition, Tella-tan.”

“Right, right. But I mean, you have a lot to do right now. I don’t want to bother you with my own desires.”

“Ye-e-eah, and I’m glad we can leave things like tha-a-at for now.”

Somewhat begrudgingly, Satella finally ended her head-patting session by getting off Subaru’s chest.

“Still wa-a-ay too much bedroom talk today. And gropin'. And pressin' your sexy bodies into me. And moanin' while be-e-ein' pet. I feel like we a-a-all need a cold shower. Especially Emilia-tan, to get her so-o-ober and awake.”

“Ah? Huh? Where am I? Subaru? I… dozed off...”

“That’s exa-a-actly what I’m talkin' about.”

Slowly Emilia managed to wake up, get up from Subaru’s chest and steady herself (well, as much as her inebriation allowed her to).

“Well, let’s go home. Preferably as soon as possible, so Emilia doesn't collapse again."

“I can teleport us back.”

“Or you can transform into a dragon, Subaru.”

“Or ya can use yo cool sword. Da one that makes portals.”

“No need for all that no-o-onsense, we can go on foot. Just pick up the pa-a-ace.”

“Betty knows of another way to make it back faster. And more entertaining one, I suppose.”

“Hm-m-m? Go ahead, Beako.”

Although Subaru was against using all of the aforementioned means of transportation, he was still very interested in what his spirit had in mind. Unfortunately, he did not notice her grin in time, a grin with just a tiny hint of malice.

“Allow me to demonstrate. Murak.”

In an instant, the Sage’s body became nearly weightless.

“Oh cool, we can run across the ro-o-o-oftops like ninjas!”

“Not exactly what Betty meant, he-he. Fula.”

Beatrice wasn’t particularly attuned to Wind mana, but she still had a few tricks up her sleeve. Before they made a contract, the Great Spirit of Yin often had to expel him from her library with Wind magic. Of course she stopped that after they tied their fates to one another. That is to say, until now she stopped.

In an instant her contractor was launched into the air and thrown down the street.

“A-A-A-H-H-H! BEAKO, WHAT THE FU-U-UCK!”

The loud scream echoed all the way across the city.

“Hah! Serves you right, for teasing your spirit all day, I suppose! Humph!”

“Beako!”

“It’s still Beatrice to you, half-elf. And Betty’s Subaru needs to be taught a lesson in respect sometimes, in fact!”

“Never mind that, we need to save him!”

Emilia rushed forward to save him first, not that she had any way to break Subaru’s fall.

“He’d be fine, right?”

“Subaru is good at parkour, in fact. Besides, as you all said, there are various ways for him to break his fall.”

-----

“A-A-A-H-H-H! BEAKO, WHAT THE FU-U-UCK!”

Due to his weightlessness, even the tiniest gust of Fula sent him flying high into the air. Currently, Subaru was at about the height of the tenth-story building and was still climbing. At about the seventeen meter level, he felt the effects of Murak fade due to the proximity from his spirit. Still, he was still climbing due to inertia, but not for long. This was bad.

Beatrice was correct, there were many ways for Subaru to break the fall: Authority of Lust would allow him to transform into his flying friend, or even someone who could cast Murak, Reality Slasher could be used to teleport him safely to the ground (though he would have to do this when his ascent stopped to avoid being launched again due to the conservation of speed). Finally, screaming “Satella, please help!” would work (as she could teleport to him and reapply Murak), though of course the consequences of yelling that in the Capital would be catastrophic.

Unfortunately, Subaru never even considered any of these three options. The reason for this was that the mere fact that he was incredibly drunk heavily influenced his decision making, so instead of doing any of these things, he simply plummeted back down towards his doom. But just as he was about to turn into a splatter, something miraculous happened. Overdosed with a sudden burst of adrenaline, his body, that was trained in the ancient arts of whip-wielding and unorthodox obstacle traversal (known back home as parkour), reacted all on its own. His saving grace was a solitary lamppost, to which he latched his whip at the last possible moment. And just as he was about to smash face-first into the ground and break, well, everything, the Guiltywhip snapped back and launched him back into the air. Using his weapon as a pseudo-bungee, he made a full swing, then another, and then another, before finally losing his grip on the whip and returning back to the ground. The final landing was sub-optimal, as his legs immediately grew weak from the shock of the impact, but he was alive, safe, and did not even break anything.

“Subaru! You’re safe!”

Before he could even catch his breath, Emilia launched himself towards him and took him in a deep embrace.

“I was so worried!”

“Ten outta ten for breakin' da fall part. Da landin' sucked tho, Flugel.”

“Not dead. Not dead. Alive and well! No need to be afraid anymore, Tella. He’s safe!”

Satella was obviously worried about Subaru’s safety as well. She mistimed the spell casting and lost her line of sight, causing her teleportation spell to fizzle just as she was about to save him. Predictably, she was terribly worried.

“I told you Betty’s Subaru would be fine.”

“Gr-r-r. Dunderhead!”

Surprisingly, the familiar insult wasn’t directed at her knight. The half-elf quickly broke the hug, turned to the Great Spirit of Yin and then:

“Apologize. Now.”

“Ow! Ow! Ow! How dare you pull Betty by the ear, I suppose! Betty is the great spirit, in fact. Ow! Stop! Alright, alright. I’ll apologize to Subaru.”

Despite Beatrice’s protests, the Half-elf Princess literally dragged her in by the ear.

“Urgh! Betty is sorry, she went too far. I hope Subaru is not mad at her…”

“Ho-o-oly shit...”

“...Betty will do extra chores for a week to make amends.”

Beatrice realized that it was mean, petty and stupid to risk her contractor's life over a little teasing. So this apology came from the heart of the spirit.

“That was a-a-awesome!”

“Two weeks then… Wait, what?”

Beatrice felt so guilty that she did not even notice the excited look on her contractor’s face.

“So co-o-o-ol, I nearly went splat! Let’s do it aga-a-ain!”

What caused the sudden rush of excitement, you might ask? Brushes with death were nothing unusual for Emilia's knight. Well, not quite the brushes, he actually experienced his demise quite a few times. And, of course, he had been wounded plenty of times as well. But what had not happened so often was avoiding his death unscathed right after reaching the point where the death was only a hair's breadth away. This was a new feeling for Subaru, and it was quite exhilarating.

“No! Subaru, you dunderhead, you almost died again!”

“Dear, please. That’s too much even for you. Don’t waste your life on cheap trills.”

Predictably, some of his companions did not share his enthusiasm.

“But, Emi-i-ilia-tan, Te-e-ella-tan. Pretty ple-e-ease!”

“No!” “No!”

When simple begging didn't work, he began to bargain:

“I will give you both a lo-o-ot more head-pats in return when we get ba-a-ack.”

“No.” “No...”

That was honestly quite tempting for both of them, Satella began to waver.

“You, Emilia-tan, get another te-e-en dates, absolutely pe-e-erfect ones, like the first one we had! As for you, Tella, unli-i-imited “grope-me” ticket, you can feel me up anytime!”

This was very tempting.

“Well, maybe…”

“Hey! How could you! You traitor, Satella!”

“What? The “grope-me” ticket sounds very good.”

“Urgh! Then I need a “brush-me” ticket, too.”

“Hu-u-uh? You want to brush my ha-a-air, Emilia-tan?”

“No, the other way around! You brush me. But reverse it’s fine too, you have got such a pretty hair… Okay, I want it both ways!”

“So the “mutual-brushing” ticket?”

“Yes. And ten daytes. And head-pats.” Art of the deal.

“Deal.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yep.”

Ten more dates, head-pats, and mutual brushing did not sound so bad to Subaru either, of course.

“What was the point of this bargaining even, in fact? If you are so afraid for his safety, you can let him take Betty with him, I suppose. I can protect him from the dangers of gravity.”

“Or, ya know, just take his whip and tie yoself to him. That way ya can save him yoself.”

“Woah, that’s a cool idea-a-a, Reid. A-a-actually, let’s make a parkour train! You dude, go in front, I'll be right behind you, Beako's on my back, followed by Tella-tan and Emilia-tan."

-----

“A-A-A-H-H-H! BEAKO, WHAT THE FU-U-UCK!”

Leo had a simple patrol-job tonight. It had been an ordinary night watch. Normally, guarding the Merchant District at night was a low-risk job. The only people roaming around here were thieves, and they tended to avoid the knights like him. If he were stationed in the slums today, he'd fear for his life, but the markets were quiet and calm. The full moon shone brightly on the plazas and the occasional chirping of Zolda bugs made for a rather peaceful and even slightly romantic atmosphere. A perfect opportunity to just nod off and relax. Well, it would have been, if it wasn't for the screaming that started a few moments ago.

It was so sudden that the poor knight almost dropped his helmet. For the first few heartbeats, he moved his head to find the source of the noise, but to no avail. It was somewhere to the southeast, in the Slums. Fortunately, it wasn't his headache.

He was just about to fall back asleep again when:

“WO-O-OAH!”

And then, less than a minute later:

“It is awesome indeed, in fact!”

The screams were followed by a sudden quake, almost like the one yesterday. And again:

“WO-O-OW! So co-o-ol! Hic!”

And again:

“Ayo, Flugel, this is even more fuckin' insane than base-jumpin' off Volc’s back!”

The noise was moving. Fast. And in his direction. In fact, it was definitely in his area of jurisdiction now.

“Fuck!”

Leo quickly slapped himself awake, unsheathed his broadsword (just in case) and rushed towards the noise.

-----

He was lucky to catch them just as they landed again. Or unlucky, depending on your perspective. The quartet (actually the quintet, but he just didn't see Satella) were sliding down towards him on the strange ice shoes, using the large chunk of ice as a ramp.

"Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit."

"We didn't steal anything, Mr. Guard! We were just having a re-e-eally good time!"

“Sure, witch-born! Like I’d believe your kind!”

To the guard, the group sounded like a bunch of smoke-leaf junkies. Very dangerous smoke-leaf junkies at that. Leaf junkies and thieves. Especially the elf girl, with those hazed eyes, messy hair, and dull grin.

"You are charged with the use of illegal substances..."

He looked judgmentally upon the Royal Candidate.

“...violations against children...”

He turned to the Great Spirit of Yin in the Sage's hands.

“...and public indecency.”

The knight shifted his attention to the Stick Swinger.

“Hey, that stupid thin’ just slipped!”

Before anyone else could see his junk, the First Sword Saint quickly fixed his robe.

“That’s bullshit, I suppose.”

“Language, Betty.”

“Sigh, Betty’s frustrated, I suppose. Just when we were having some fun...”

“Urgh, it’s those fuckin' assholes from the Co-o-ouncil tryin' to chain me up aga-a-ain! Shit, time for the prison arc, I gue-e-ess.”

Chapter Text

"So, does anyone know what Sage is even planning right now?"

"Long-term? No."

"No idea."

"That is hard to predict, given his… oddities."

"'Tis as impossible to do as predicting the state of the midnight sky."

"Lady Priscilla?"

"Don't you understand? Obviously, on an ordinary day the sky would move in an ordinary fashion, but there are days when the moon itself is cloaked in red, when a distant star suddenly shines brighter than it ever has, only to fall to the ground somewhere beyond the horizon. Today is certainly not ordinary. And the Sage is that shining star."

"Damn, that's kinda poetic and also grim... Are you in love with Nii-chan by any chance?"

"Don't be ridiculous, slum rat. Though I will not deny that his persona is rather striking. If that half-elf had not laid a claim to him first, he would've made for a decent servant."

"The winds of untruth…"

Crusch's usually serious facial expression was currently replaced by a knowing grin. To be fair, a lot of other people had reconsidered their stance on the Great Sage of Lugunica in the past few days.

"Wait, really?"

"Absolutely."

"Ha-ha!"

"Silence."

"Well, anyway, we can't predict what Nii-chan will do in a year or so, but we do know that he was planning to make the trip to Vollachia."

"Ayup, I'd say he might be able to have some sway on Emperor Vincent, given his unique position there. And I assume that Kararagi and Gusteko will be da next destinations after that."

"Wait, hold, Anastasia-sama. What position are you talking about?"

"Oh, he just might be a prince there."

"What?!"

"What ya just heard, Mister Marcos."

"How? I mean, he looks a bit like Emperor Vincent, but his character and disposition..."

"The Yang Sword had chosen him."

"And..?"

"That is it. 'Tis enough proof of his worthiness for the throne of Vollachia."

"Yep, Nii-chan is actually a noble, technically. So even if that asshole Bordeaux managed to restrain him, they'd have no grounds to strip him of his knighthood."

"I dunno, I think him bein' that important in da Land of Wolves won't give him any bonuses here in Lugunica. Opposite really, given the animosity between da two countries."

"Wait, wait, wait! Ladies, how exactly did he find that blade?"

"He just did."

"Just did?"

"Just did."

"Lady Priscilla? Did you-…"

"Just did. That is all that needs to be said."

"Pf-f-f."

The Slum Princess began to giggle. She was soon joined by the Great Businesswoman and then by the Valkyrie. Needless to say, all three knew of Priscilla's background. Felt had been told about the unique blade by Gram and had drawn her own conclusions, Crusch had heard rumors about Prisca Benedict's survival from Felix, who'd once been in Vollachia. Finally, thanks to her intelligence network, Anastasia knew the most about the proud Vollachian Princess.

"Silence."

Thankfully, before the situation about the odd acquisition of the Yang Blade became even more awkward, someone else barged into the meeting.

"Captain Marcos. Finally. I found you… Oh… Greetings, Royal Candidates, my apologies for my improper behavior."

"What is it, Kairos?"

"As you recall, you sent our superior Lt. Vark and most of our squad to Priestella yesterday, as well as the most of the Royal Knights present in the Capital. There are about ten of us left to patrol the city and…"

"Get on with it. What happened?"

"*whispering*"

"And?"

"*whispering*"

"Ah, crap."

"*whispering*"

"Well, fuck… Ehm, Royal Candidates, I believe we might have a problem. Gather your people, we have to visit the local prison."

-----

"Right here, Captain Marcos. We put the men here and the women to the right. As you can see the prisoners are completely secure."

"Pf-f-f. Su-u-ure, Sir Knight, very secure. Right, Julius?"

The one who had led him here had opened the front door, so unlike the people he had escorted here, he had not seen what was inside.

"Sir Kairos, how should I say…"

"What is it?"

"Look inside, Sergeant…"

"Oh…"

The prison cell to which he had led the Dragon Princesses and their associates to was wrecked. No, that's an understatement, it was utterly ravaged beyond all belief. The bars were caved, the furniture smashed with extreme prejudice, and more importantly, the walls separating the two affected cells had a hole big enough to fit a giant through.

-----

Previously.

"O-o-oi, guard!"

"What? You again?"

"Why did you split us apa-a-art? I want to be with my Be-e-eako and Emi-i-ilia-tan!"

Fortunately, Tella was still near him, but only because she happened to be invisible. Otherwise, only Reid, currently sleeping on the bench, would be his only cellmate.

"No. We separated you on purpose because of our suspicions about you and that little child."

"I'm not a pedo! Tell them yourse-e-elf, Beako!"

"Betty's Subaru is right! Betty is his contracted spirit, in fact!"

The equally angry Great Spirit of Yin shouted this from the neighboring cell.

"Yes, Subaru and Beatrice are just re-e-eally close, they don't do anything naughty. They just spend all their time together! They even sleep side by side!"

"Emilia-tan, don't sa-a-abotage!"

"Sabotage? Is sleeping beside someone considered naughty?"

"Yes, Emilia-tan. Sleepin' with someone is usually interpreted like tha-a-at, but Beako is like a chi-i-ild to me!"

"Not a chance, fiend!"

"Argh! Fuck yo-o-ou!"

Suddenly, the very clearly mad Sage pulled out a shining blade out of the thin air.

"Yang Sword, go-o-o! Maximum Inferno!"

Just as suddenly, he swung and..:

"Ah, fuck! What da fuck, Flugel!"

...missed. Instead of striking the wall separating the two cells, he hit at the bench where Stick Swinger resided. The resulting explosion turned the bench to dust and launched Reid into the air, almost slamming him into the ceiling.

"Oh, ups. My ba-a-ad, bro. Alright, try number two-o-o, ahem! Crimson-black blaze, king of myriad worlds, though I promulgate the laws of nature, I am the alias of destruction incarnate in accordance with the principles of creation. Let the hammer of eternity descend unto me! EXPLOSION!"

On the second try, the blow landed, creating a sizable hole in the wall.

"Take tha-a-at, wall!"

"Ah, crap! I need reinforcements!"

The poor knight turned around and ran for backup. As he did so, he heard a scream from behind his back:

"Emilia-tan and I need a pro-o-oper accommodation, you corrupt a-a-assholes!"

-----

"Well, shit. Looks like someone played too rough."

"Captain Marcos, we didn't do anything extreme. Usually, we just put the drunks here for the night and let them go in the morning! We would never beat them up, especially like that! I mean, my college Leo apparently suffered a minor injury when we tried to arrest him, but that's nothing we'd get too rough about."

"Yeah, I'd figure you'd be smart enough not to start a fight with the Sage and the fucking Sword Saint."

"The Sage? The Sword Saint? Wait, all that they were talking about…"

"True, of course. As one who sees untruthful winds, I can attest to that. Also, Captain Marcos, you forgot to mention the Royal Candidate and the Great Spirit." And someone else who she did not name.

"Right, right, Lady Crusch, them as well."

"Royal Candidate?"

"Wait, how did you not notice Nee-chan? She's very unique. I mean have you seen anyone like…"

"Of course we had. Duh. Subaru-kyun's thiyrd gi-…" "-rlfriend."

"Not what I meant, Blue."

"Well, to be honest, they were all not in a state to be recognized. And we had to apprehend them at night. Visibility was not the best and..."

"Empty excuses. The moon shines brightly tonight. Still, your incompetence is so comical that it has become entertaining, fools. This situation certainly amuses me."

"Lady Priscilla, as amusing as it is, we must find them before my ancestor causes more ruckus."

"Ah yes, a drunkard helping search other drunkards. Of course, a clown like you will have a keen enough sense of alcohol to sniff them out."

"Lady Priscilla, I don't drink that much. I mean, I used to, but I actually want to go clean now."

"Father?"

"What? Since we've been doing this together, I thought I shouldn't be a deadbeat dad anymore either."

"No, I'm just glad, that you decided that."

"Sh-h-h! Further reconciliation can wait, first we have to find the trace of Subaru-dono."

"The Sword Devil is certainly right in this assessme-e-ent. Now where would Subaru-kun go-o-o?"

"Well, da exterior walls seem fine, and there doesn't seem to be any damage in da corridors. Where are yo colleagues by da way? Da place seems completely empty. No traces of blood or bodies either. Very dank smell tho."

Saying that the dog-man sniffed the air.

"I have no idea, sir..?"

"Ricardo, and no sir stuff. I'm not a noble. Just a friend of Lil' Ana."

"Right, Mr. Ricardo. They must have escaped while I was away."

-----

Eventually they found them. It took Reinhard receiving another Divine Protection from Od Lagna (Divine Protection of The Legendary Hunter that allows him to efficiently track an animal or a person of his choice) to get there. As it turned out, they were simply on the top floor, in the absent lieutenant's quarters.

Inside a rather lavish room, the remaining nine knights stood watch over a sofa. Sitting on the sofa were the Sage himself, his red-haired companion, two of his half-elf girlfriends (one of whom only appeared as a barely perceptible shadow), and the Great Spirit of Yin. The remains of the coffee table were scattered on the floor. Why was it destroyed? No one present knew, not the people who had just arrived, not the knights, not the Subaru's companions, and not even the Sage himself. Nevertheless, the personal vendetta that Subaru seemed to have against the pieces of furniture still continued.

"M-m-m, Subaru… Is someone in he-e-ere? Hic!"

Still sleepy and with her eyes still closed, the Half-elf Royal Candidate rose from his shoulder.

"Ayup, looks like the prison arc is o-o-over. What took you so lo-o-ong? I was so bo-o-ored! I even emptied the bo-o-o-oze stash of the guy who lives he-e-ere."

"Never change, Subaru-kyun."

In an instant, the mood of the people searching for the missing Sage turned from tense to joyful. Some started to laugh, some smiled, some chuckled.

"So what happened, Subaru-ku-u-un?"

"I got mad at tho-o-ose Council guys (assholes!) and got drunk again."

"No, we mean the incident with the destroyed prison cell."

"Oh, tha-a-at? Well, I was mad that Emilia-tan, Beako and I were put in the separate stinky ce-e-ells, so I demanded a pro-o-oper accommodations for my lady."

"And your contracted spirit, I suppose."

"And you too, Be-e-eako. You are important too-o-o."

To prove his point, he continued to pat Beatrice's head with greater intensity.

"And when he was refused, he began to trash the place. Eventually, we had to acquiesce and use the lieutenant's room to… contain them."

"And you are..?"

"Sir Leo. I had the misfortune of apprehending this bunch."

A knight with a black-eye replied.

"Damn, that looks rough. Did Nii-chan really beat you up?"

"Sigh, yes."

"Hah! Nice one, Nii-chan!"

"Lady Felt..."

"What Rein? I guarantee he had that coming. Or do you think I'm wrong?"

"I believe that Sir Leo just decided not to retaliate or intercept the blow out of his honor as a knight of…"

"Nope, kid! Flugel just really caught him off guard and kicked his ass! I guess he just didn't expect someone as drunk as him to be so fast."

"I did not."

"Hah! Even better!"

"Dese-e-erved! That's what you get for badmouthin' my Emilia-tan! Fuckin' racist a-a-assholes!"

"I may indeed have said some inappropriate things to Lady Emilia."

"I can't believe I'm sayin' this, but Natsuki-kun and Lady Felt do have a point – ya really fucked up. Never mind da blind hatred for da half-elves, how could ya even fail to recognize da Royal Candidate?"

"I mean… Aside from the fact that we had to apprehend them at night, I don't believe Lady Emilia here was in a particularly recognizable state. Scratch that, she still isn't."

Saying that, he pointed to the still snoozing half-elf that was currently drooling on her knight's shoulder.

"She is not inde-e-ed. Emilia-sama, it's time to wa-a-ake. Please refrain yourself from embarrassing yourself and your knight."

"Oh? Wah? Where am I..? Roswaal, you are here too? Or am I hollicinating?"

"Hallucinatin' not hollicinatin', Emilia-tan. A-a-also you don't seein' things, Roswaal is really he-e-ere."

"Awake, half-wit? The empty-headed troublemaker."

"Hi, Dona! Can I call you Dona, or is it personal..? Hic! Anyway, you all came to break us out? We were re-e-eally bad people today though. Broke some rules… Hic! … and some things. That's why we have to stay here for the rest of our lives! But we'll be fine… Hic! ...I like being here as long as it's with Subaru…"

Emilia, in her frankly amazing innocence, thought that their incarceration was permanent.

"Now ho-o-old on, Emila-tan, while I appreciate bein' with yo-o-ou, we were not stayin' here fore-e-ever. Just like a couple of years at the mo-o-ost. It's fine, I can run the country from the pri-i-ison like Pablo Escobar! Or ma-a-aybe like Nobusuke Kishi, who became the Prime Minister after the wa-a-ar... Wait no, that's a really ba-a-ad example. Or maybe like Napoleon, wasn't he like imprisoned for a little bi-i-it? Or like Adolf Hitler? Wait, that's even wo-o-orse! Hm, didn't Joseph Stalin have a criminal record, too-o-o? Why do so many criminals just rise to power like tha-a-at? Do you have to be cruel and ruthless to ru-u-ule? A lot of blood has been shed in the pa-a-ast... But there have been a lot of ni-i-ice people in power in the past too… Or is that just propaganda and..?"

Predictably, the drunken knight rather quickly lost the point and went on a random tantrum that no one else really understood.

"Natsuki-kun, what are ya talkin' 'bout?"

"E-e-eh, don't mind me-e-e, I was just havin' a philosophical a-a-argument with myself."

"Don't worry, Nii-chan. You can still be a criminal and still have a noble purpose. Look at Rachins and his friends for example. Idiots all three, but they have their uses."

"Oi, that's rude, Felt!"

"In any case, there a-a-aren't that many charges against us: just the pro-o-operty damage, the assault on the officer in the line of du-u-uty, and resistin' the arre-e-est. Oh, and the public indecency for Reid."

"Ha-ha, the Pervert got caught!"

Shaula, clearly having her own personal issues with the Stick Swinger, stuck out her tongue.

"I said that fuckin' robe just slipped, come on!"

"...And the attempts of bribery of the country's official on duty."

A knight with a black-eye chimed in.

"Hey, I didn't know there's no paro-o-ole here! I just wanted to pay for the da-a-amage!"

"There is a parole in Lugunica, Natsuki-kun..."

"...only it's restricted to the noble-born. Also, you can't pay for your own release. The one who grants the pardon also must be your liege. It's called a "Blue-Blooded Pardon". So in your case, Nii-chan, only Roswaal can do it, since Nee-chan is also behind bars. And in Nee-chan's case… I dunno... Dragon, I guess... There has never been such a precedent. Or are we just immune to prosecution?"

"That's classism! 'lright, that's one of the first things I have to cha-a-ange!"

"Anything else?"

"No, nothing else. We thought they were under the influence of illegal substances, but no. Just really drunk."

"So, since the crimes are relatively mi-i-inor, the release is easy to arrange, is it no-o-ot?"

"Of course, Margrave. As Lieutenant Vark's superior, who would otherwise handle the arrest, I'll grant the early parole on the promise that the damage will be paid for. What did they manage to break during their partying?"

"The pavement in the Merchant and Slum Districts was badly damaged, and the southern bridge between the Slums and the Merchant District collapsed thanks to Lady Emilia's chunks of ice."

"Wasn't that one scheduled for the complete reconstruction anyway?"

"Well, yes, but…"

"So write it off, Lady Emilia clearly provided the demolition service free of charge."

"Right, right, acknowledged, Captain. There was also some heavy structural damage reported to one of the taverns..."

"I've paid for tha-a-at one!"

"As you can see, that charge is unnecessary as well. Anything else?"

"No, Captain! Apart from the damage to the prison itself."

"Add to that damage money for the medicine for you, Sergeant."

"Urgh, just let Betty fix it really quick, I suppose."

"Lady Beatrice, Ferri can..."

"Shut it, Blue. I can do it myself, in fact."

Within minutes, a black-eye disappeared from the face of the knight who had the misfortune of coming upon the Sage and his companions.

"Sergeant, your next duty is to properly access the damage, make a report, and send a copy to the Margrave. I expect it done by the end of the week."

"Aye-aye, sir!"

"Everyone's dismissed. Continue your duties."

After receiving their next order, the knights left the newly arrived alone.

-----

"Subaru, one more question…"

"What i-i-is it, Julius?"

"We saw the damage you did to the prison. Why didn't you just escape?"

"Julius-kyun is right. You have about twelve ways to escape from this situation, Subaru-kyun."

"Hey, I'm not a cri-i-iminal! I believe in the rule of ju-u-ustice, fa-a-airness, and… somethin', I forgo-o-ot."

"Pff-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

Priscilla nearly collapsed from the sudden fit of laughter. With that, the brief prison arc was over.

Chapter Text

Soon, everyone began to return to their base of operations.

"So what do you thi-i-ink, Emilia-tan?"

"Hm?"

The two drunkards slowly stumbled in front of the group, leaning on each other for support, neither of them particularly good on their feet in their current condition. It looked rather adorable.

"Was that a fu-u-un date?"

"Dayte? But that wasn't a dayte! Hic!"

"Why no-o-ot? We walked around the city in a roma-a-antic atmosphere, visited some cool pla-a-aces, chatted together, even had some i-i-intimate moments! How is that not a da-a-ate?"

"I mean, I had fun and everything, but the dayte is… Hic! The dayte is when we are alone… tet-a-… how did you say it, Subaru?"

"Tête-à-tête."

"Right, tête-à-tête. Remember our first dayte?"

"Mhm, I do. I ne-e-ever forget it, Emilia-tan. A-a-and?"

"Remember how you even asked… Hic! ...how you even asked not to bring Puck? But tonight we had Reid and Beatrice and Sa-…"

Before Emilia could casually namedrop the Witch of Envy in the middle of the Capital, she was interrupted. Not because of the need to keep Sage's unique situation a secret, no, rather:

"Wa-a-ait, Emilia-tan, if you include he-e-er, that would mean we have never even be-e-e-en tête-à-tête. She's literally been around here since my first bre-e-eath in this place!"

"Alright, maybe not her, cause you can't get rid of her, but…"

"Oi, girl, I'm not cock-blockin' ya two! If anythin', I encourage!"

"Betty doesn't mind you mingling either, I suppose. As long as it doesn't get physical in front of me, in fact."

"Se-e-e-e? Those two don't interfere either. This was cle-e-early a date, then."

"Okay, fine! Dunderhead! But you still own me ten more! Hic! And the head-pats and the brushing!"

"Huh, you reme-e-embered."

"Of course, I did! I'd never forget! When have I… Hic! When have I ever forgotten anything?"

"You forget things all the time, in fact! Do you remember what you ate this morning, I wonder?"

"This morning… Hm-m-m…"

The half-elf spent the next ten seconds pondering about the Beatrice's question (it was a rhetorical one, of course), further proving the point.

"We ate nothin' in the mo-o-ornin', Emilia-tan. We woke up in the to-o-ower with all of our food supply runnin' out ye-e-esterday."

"Oh, right! Right… I remember that."

"Su-u-ure."

"Annoying… Gr-r-r..."

"He-he."

"What?!"

"You look ve-e-ery cute right now. E.M.T.! Every time you po-o-out, I have such an urge to pop your cheeks. Ca-a-an I?

"Mhm…"

"Boop!"

"Pf-f-f-f-f-f-t-t-t."

With a single finger press, the cheeks were popped with a soft puff. Oddly enough, Emilia did not stop him. As for actual reason for that: it just reminded her of someone, someone very close to her, someone she could not bring back.

"A-a-anyway, I also learned a cool new trick!"

"Another one?"

"What do you mean 'ano-o-other one', Anastasia? You make me sound like I am a Swiss Army knife of che-e-eap party tricks!"

"Swiss...?"

"It's an instrument that combines va-a-arious metal tools inside itself: knives, forks, spoons, can openers…"

"Can openers?"

"Oh, you don't have those e-e-either? Well, you have the cork openers tho, ri-i-ight? Similar purpose. Some exotic Swiss Army knives have na-a-ail clippers, sci-i-issors, sta-a-aplers, et cetra. They are connected by two rotatin' hi-i-inges, so you simply flip out the tool you ne-e-e-ed. Handy! 'lright, I'll give you a blu-u-ueprint when we're done here.

"Hm-m-m, what was I sa-a-ayin'… Ah! What I wanted to say is: do you guys really thi-i-ink I can come up with new bullshit abilities on the fly-y-y?"

"Well, yeah, Natsuki-kun. Given what has already happened."

"You can, Subaru. Hic!"

"Yes, in fact."

"Yup, Master is cool like that."

"Aye-aye."

"Te-he-he. You do have a lot of them to be fair, love."

"Yes."

"…"

"…"

"…"

Somehow, one by one, literally everyone who followed him agreed. To be fair, between the Authorities, the spellcraft he developed with Beatrice, his bizarre and unorthodox fighting style, the absurd knowledge that he called science along with various inventions, as well as various random skills that he had for whatever reason, Subaru really looked like the so-called Swiss Army knife of various tricks. And if you mix and match these unique abilities, then the number of possible solutions to the problems that the Emilia's knight had at his disposal would become almost infinite. If anything, the title of "Sage" actually made sense now.

That was why people seemed to look up to him. That was why the "Yes" wasn't a mockery, but rather a compliment with a small touch of humor.

"Truly the most fascinating person in the world."

The first praise came from Echidna, which surprised almost everyone but her old companions – who were very much aware of her passion for knowledge.

"Mhm, truly fascinating inde-e-e-ed, Teacher."

Her student joined in too, setting a precedent.

"Subaru is re-e-eally amazing! Hic!"

"Yeah, Nii-chan is kinda cool."

"Certainly entertaining enough for a commo-… for a someone as important as he is."

"The bravest person I know with a mind that works ten steps ahead."

"Aye. Too bad ya didn't go into business, Natsuki-kun."

The Royal Candidates each had their own compliments to say.

And that prompted everyone to add their own words, until it simply became a game of "Who can praise Subaru the most?". Of course, most people weren't satisfied with just a sentence or two, so it became an almost endless loop. Some, like Emilia, grew rather competitive. Add to that the voice of his beloved patron in his head, and what you get is that Subaru was pretty much surrounded by the voices of validation on all sides.

The knights,...

"You are quite capable, Subaru. I envy you quite a bit."

"One of the finest examples of the true nobility."

"Ferri has to admit, you are pretty awesome, Subaru-kyun."

...the old friends,...

"Master is absolutely bonkers! And awesome, and dashing, and clever, and hot, and…"

"Aye, Flugel is a badass!"

...his forbidden old love,...

"You are wonderful. So very wonderful!"

…his contracted spirit,…

"Of course he is, in fact. As you would expect from Betty's contractor, I suppose."

…and the other people that the Royal Candidates brought with them all praised the Sage.

"I have to agree as well. There's no one quite like you, Subaru-dono."

"Urgh, he's a good kid. Brash and a bit reckless, but still. Sorry we tried to mug you back then."

"I had some concerns about you, but as long as Ana trusts your judgment, so do I."

"What are you praising him for?! He hasn't done anything big yet!"

Well, maybe not everyone praised him, there was one exception – Heinkel Astrea.

"What are ya talkin' about, ya alcoholic? Da kid just cleared the Pleiades Watchtower, ended most of da Witch Cult, saved all of da Capella's victims, includin' a Royal Candidate! All in two days!"

Anastasia's dogman companion quickly came to the Subaru's defense.

"Alright, alright! He did good."

So of all the Subaru's crew who came to the capital today, only Volcanica, who was in the palace at this time, didn't pay him any compliments (although he would if he were present).

-----

As for the Sage's reaction: we-e-ell… Subaru was… embarrassed. So much so that he wanted to curl up in a ball and die. Permanently this time. No, not in the bad sense of the word "die", he did not want to be dead. He was just ultra-mega-super-hyper-absurdly embarrassed! More embarrassed right now than even someone as shy as Carmilla, which was saying something.

"No, stop it!"

"No, I'm not like that!"

"No it's just this stupid Authority!"

"No, I can't do anything! I have never been able to do anything! You are the ones who keep doing things!"

"Please... just stop!"

It wasn't even that he hated it. Opposite really, he loved it. Despite the fact that he still did not believe that he was praise-worthy at all, he subconsciously craved external validation very much.

"He really is that man's son."

The old mantra. A vestige of his old attention-seeking ways. He was somewhat selfish in that regard, narcissistic even. When people said "You did good," or "You can do this," or "You're awesome," it often flipped some kind of mental switch in him. This switch made him focused, concentrated, determined. It made him believe that he could do anything he set his mind to (and sometimes that was correct). Emilia knew about this switch (the first time she hit it was when she gave him his first lap pillow), Rem knew about it (the first time she called him her hero, he ended the White Whale and the Sin Archbishop of Sloth), Satella knew about it (she comforted him many times in the past, the latest two being when they met in the Castle of Dreams and upon her arrival at the party in Priestella), Ram knew about it, Beatrice knew about it, Otto knew about it, Garfiel knew about it, Echidna knew about it, Roswaal knew about it… Well, nearly everyone who knew him long enough knew. So it made sense that he would want to be constantly praised by the people around him, to flip that switch over and over again. It was like a drug to him.

The issue was that this hidden narcissism was also paired with a frankly rather ridiculous (if we are talking about the outside perspective) self-hatred. It came from constantly raising the bar for himself, hoping to at least imitate the perceived greatness of the people around him, and then of course eventually falling short of those standards, and then blaming himself for it. So when the people did flip said switch, his mind would often push back against it, vigorously denying their words and calling himself a fraud, a fool, and a poser. Add to that the unique nature of his Authority, and you've got a toxic cocktail of self-flagellation that was so unhealthy it could drive the Sin Archbishop insane if they were to peer into his mind (well, more insane than they already were).

That was why Subaru was so deeply affected by all of this praise – because he was torn between his obsessive Pride and his self-degrading Humility.

-----

"A-a-a-a-a-h-h-h!"

Overwhelmed by these intense emotions, he shut his eyes, covered his ears, bent his body and screamed. Others, rather surprised by an odd reaction to the genuine praise, were taken aback for but a moment, and that was enough of a window for him to escape. Suddenly, his skin began to glow again, and then… he vanished.

"And he's gone. You all made Nii-chan all too flustered."

"Subaru?"

"Ah, shit! We lost Flugel again! Fuck!"

"Hold on! Did you people see what happened? I swear I saw the elf ears…"

"Don't bother, Captain Marcos, it's just one of Natsuki-kun's many abilities. Da same one that allows him to take da shape of da Great Dragon."

"But why ..?"

"The she-fox is right. Do not bother to understand him or his abilities."

-----

"No, not here."

The form of the half-elf Witch began to glow as she muttered the incantation again.

She vanished from where she had been, only to reappear deeper in.

"Not here either. Hm-m-m. Two more layers down."

She moved further and further going further away from the world that she was born in. A world that no longer welcomed her there.

"Ah, there you are."

In the infinite, empty expanse of black, a half-elf girl sat on the ground (or something resembling a ground, anyway), all the while screaming at no one in particular.

"Why do you keep praising me? I'm a fool, an incompetent fool, stumbling my way to the eventual success! Don't you understand how many times I have failed? How many times this bloody world has burned because of my stupidity, my weakness!? Every bloody problem you all ever had was because I fucked up four centuries ago! The Witch of Envy, the Great Witchbeasts, hell, maybe even the fucking Witch Cult as well, given I was connected to Geuse! Argh! Fuck! I hate this! I hate this! I hate ME!"

Said girl continued to rant into the empty void, as if there were anything there to confront or console him/her, while the space around him/her wailed and creaked under the onslaught of his/her Wrath. The only illumination he/she had came from two lights just above his/her face. One of which came from one of the wandering spirit, so surprised by the sudden visitor that it even ignored the minor damage that Sage's Authority was doing to it. Said spirit was currently mingling with another quasi – one that had followed the Sage all the way from his tower – that was a second light above his/her face. Apart from these two, the space around Subaru was completely barren.

For a brief moment, Satella hesitated to approach her beloved: she was afraid that the immense feeling of anger in his/her mind would infect her again, causing her to lose control of Envy. But after a brief inhale, she finally reached out.

The girl looked just as beautiful in this half-elven form as he/she did in his/her true form, this transformation being the result of another Authority, the Authority of Lust. Of the many forms the Sage could transform into, Satella found this one to be the most attractive: silky black hair with white streaks; familiar senpaku eyes, so gorgeous to look into; small and elegant nose; lips, so pretty that just looking at them made Satella want to kiss them; thin neck; puffy cheeks; amazing voice that reminded her of the chiming of bells; delicate hands; perfect hourglass body structure; lean waist; smooth legs; ample bosom; and ass... oh man, that ass! It taunted her, making Satella really want to slap it!

Funnily enough, despite the fact that they shared these features, Satella never mentally linked the two appearances, and thus never found herself as attractive as her lover. She never really considered her beloved's current appearance an imitation of herself, but rather an improvement over her unremarkable self (which is ironic, since Subaru considered his form a pale copy of two of his beloved half-elves).

Very gently, Satella approached the girl from behind, placed her hands on the girl's shoulders, and then just as gently pecked him/her on the cheek. That immediately made the girl snap out of it.

"Te-e-ella..."

"I love you."

"Huh?"

"I love you."

"Ah shit, the wro-o-ong one?"

"He-he, the right one. Just don't be mad at yourself, please."

As a result of both her actions and her words, both Subaru's anger and fear were replaced by feelings of relief and affection.

"Oh, tha-a-ank the heavens. I thought I was stuck in this void with E-e-envy-tan."

"The worst thing she could do right now is some very passionate loving. Or the best, it's really a matter of perspective. After all, you haven't done anything wrong yet. Do you want me to call her in?"

"Tella-ta-a-an… What are you e-e-even sayin'? Do you want me to be devo-o-oured by shadows again?"

"Well, no… But hey, we're not as separate as you think. Envy is not just a malevolent alien entity in my head that occasionally takes control, no, rather it's a part of me that is influenced by a said malevolent alien entity. A rather crazy part as a result of that influence, yes, but she… or that-me loves you just as much as the real-me loves you. She just doesn't understand that her endless Envy is hurting you. I am not possessed, I'm… well… mentally damaged."

"Heh, good to kno-o-ow. So as soon as we find a way to disconnect Envy Witch Factor fro-o-om you, you'll be no-o-ormal again?"

"I think so. Honestly, Authorities are a difficult subject to understand. No one really knows how they work. Neither the Archbishops, nor the Witches."

"Gre-e-eat! As for the Authorities, as long as they wo-o-ork, I won't ask metaphysical questions. No-o-ow, where are we? I don't even know how I go-o-ot here. I just wanted to be anywhere but back the-e-ere with all the people complimentin' me-e-e..."

"That's the twelfth layer. The universal south."

"La-a-ayer? South?"

"Well, can you imagine your world and my world? Think of them as a layers on a sandwich – that's how you described it back then. This place is a layer too, one of many."

"And the 'south' part?"

"Hm-m-m, that one is harder to explain. Alright, throw away the sandwich metaphor and imagine a spider web instead. At the center is a prime plane, which is where Lugunica is. It's the largest dimension in a group. In various directions there are more joints – other smaller dimensions. This one is the twelve one in the 'south' direction (not really the south, we just called it like that). You can go to the 'south' worlds by the means of Yin Magic. Worlds one to four can be accessed by Astral Walk. World five used to contain Dona's Library, that's the Betty's Door Crossing. Worlds six to eight can be breached by Al Shamak, for example, the Great Rabbit is contained in the layer seven. World ten is the Shadow Garden. Frankly, it seemed like you were instinctively aiming for it, but overshot. Of course, there are other directions as well. Oh, and your home world is in its own, probably separate web."

"Huh, so how many worlds are o-o-out there?"

"I don't know. The farthest you went to is thirty-five levels deep, which is honestly ridiculous – I never went beyond fifteen. The further you go, the more mana you need. Most of the layers are empty, like this one, or almost empty."

She pointed to the yang quasi-spirit that Subaru managed to attract with his antics.

"You liked to explore a lot: I mean, you probably wanted to find a way back from where you came from, or maybe the other worlds like ours…"

"A-a-ah… I probably just wanted to see my relatives again… Speakin' of whi-i-ich… So was I born there, was isekaied, fell in love with you, fucked up, returned back home, lived there as the son of Kenshi and Naoko, and the-e-en you pulled me back?"

"I don't know, actually. I mean, the first five are correct, but the others… When you left, I felt that your soul had moved way beyond fifty layers, so far that I could barely feel your warmth. Let alone be able to see what had happened to you."

"Huh, well I wonder how I di-i-id that… You know, Tella, I still want to go back to the-e-em… my mo-o-om and da-a-ad. Not permanently, but li-i-ike just to see them again for a bit. Not in dre-e-eams or the projection that Echidna made, but like re-e-eal them… Well, somethin' to ponder 'bout, I gue-e-ess. Once I fix this place. Hm-m-m, past-me probably wanted to do the sa-a-ame…

"Wait... How long was I in he-e-ere?! The first time?!"

Out of nowhere, he was struck by a sudden epiphany.

"Eight years."

"Now wa-a-ait a minute! If it's eight years, then logically, if I made a full life cycle, that would be twenty-five ye-e-ears! And that doesn't make sense because there would be a temporal disconnect between this-me and the past-me a size of genera-a-ation! And there isn't one! Just look at Shaula! She's spoutin' a modern day Earth li-i-ingo! Even if I haven't made a full life cycle, and even if the time flows faster here, it still doesn't make se-e-ense! How did I even lose my memories the-e-en?"

"Now this one is more difficult to explain. The time aspect makes it even more confusing. I think the past-you lived exactly like this-you in the same time and at the same time. His parents were your parents."

"Wait, please repeat this aga-a-ain… I don't understand."

"Past-you lived his life back home from newborn to young adult; then went to what would later be called Lugunica to the point in time of four hundred years ago; things happened; past-you went back home, back to the point of his birth and lost his memories and became this-you. This-you lived his life just the same way and then returned here, but now only one year ago. Past-you and this-you look the same, sound the same, feel the same, and think the same, but because of the different circumstances here, two of you develop your Authorities differently. That was your plan. To try again to save me. Differently this time."

"Shi-i-it, this timeline is more convoluted than the one in Te-e-erminator! Actually, it might not be as complicated if you consider the new mo-o-ovies… So you think that my-y-y timeline and the timeline of the pa-a-ast-me just overlap in one place?"

"I don't know! Listen, I think… you reincarnated back into your child self and grew back again… You said you wanted to try your life again… from zero… That's why I think that. But whether it happened the same way or not, neither Dona nor I know exactly. Dona was dead at that point in time, so were the other Witches, so they could not exactly interact with my world or yours. We just don't know what happened when you departed this world. I was too far away to reach you. I've spent four centuries trying to gather the mana needed to bring you back. And then, when Envy and I reached out for you, I swear I felt somethi-... no, rather someone else."

"Huh?"

"I don't know, I felt like there wasn't just one of you, like there were many of you, each different in various ways. Don't be mad, but… I picked you out of all the others pretty much blindly."

"Really? That's the 'many worlds' the-e-eory. There must be different dimensions, each with its own Su-u-ubaru! That co-o-ould explain the timeline overlap. Wa-a-ait... A-a-are you sure you even grabbed the right 'Natsuki Subaru'?"

"I don't know!"

"What do you me-e-ean, you don't kno-o-ow!?"

"I DON'T KNOW!"

In a fit of passion, a bunch of shadow hands sprouted from Satella's body. Thankfully, no order to attack had been given as of yet. This was the first time that Subaru had seen the ever-feared Witch of Envy genuinely angry at him/her. Well, not really the "I'm so mad that I want to hurt you!"-angry just the "I am very upset with you!"-angry. Maybe he/she should not do that. Still, the Sage found both her and Emilia's pouts equally adorable.

"Pf-f-f-f-f-t-t-t. You are so obno-" "-xious sometimes!"

His/her response to her pout was just the same as it had been to the half-elven Royal Candidate tantrum – a simple poke. However, just as she was about to complain again, he/she pulled her chin up, forcing them to lock eyes, which instantly made the shadow hands disappear and the so-called Witch dead silent. Subaru, who had suddenly become incredibly smooth for no apparent reason, moved even closer to her, so close that Satella could swear that he/she was about to kiss her. So she closed her eyes and puckered her lips, but:

"Don't be ma-a-ad, please. I'm so-o-orry. I was too pushy with my questions."

Instead of kissing her, the Sage just pressed his/her index finger gently against her lips.

"You absolute tease… Don't just…"

"Wha-a-at?"

"Nothing… Sigh…"

Satella wasn't sure if he/she was doing that on purpose or not (it was very much on purpose – an ingenious way to soothe her anger). After stiffing an urge to just push him/her to the ground and pounce on top, Satella eventually continued.

"It could be the differences between your world and mine that caused this. Or it might be your Authority."

"We-e-ell, whether I was the right one doesn't matter now, do-o-oes it? 'lright, let's get back. How do we do that?"

"I can help. I know the way back."

"Oh, good. Oka-a-ay, little guy, it was nice meetin' you he-e-ere, but it's time for us to go. You are free to go… well, where-e-ever you were goin' to."

That was directed at the wandering yang spirit that had bumped into in here. However, instead of just flying away, said spirit continued to circle around him/her, occasionally creating brief flashes of white light. It clearly took a liking to the drunken Sage.

"Oka-a-ay, if you want to follow us, I'll brin' you back to-o-o-o, but I can't sign a contract with you – Beako is ve-e-ery possessive when it comes to that."

Despite his words, the yang spirit continued to circle around Emilia's knight, seemingly unconcerned about the lack of a contract. It probably had something to do with the ginormous spiritual affinity that Subaru possessed. Unfortunately, due to circumstances that occurred after his/her arrival to this world, he/she never had the time to properly utilize this affinity, as he/she lived with the two entities that tended to spook the lesser spirits: the first one was formerly contracted with his/her mistress, while the second one made a contract with him/her. Still, this wandering ball of light, despite clearly feeling the link between the Sage and his/her blonde companion, decided to follow them back to the Capital, much like the spirit from the Pleiades Watchtower who did the same.

"Alright, now hold my hand, concentrate and link with me. Precise 'layer hopping' is difficult to do, it's not just willy-nilly punching your way through dimensions, there's a skill involved!"

-----

"And we back!"

"Subaru! You've returned! Hic! I was so wo-… Oh! You are in... that form…"

Subaru didn't even have enough time to recover from the jump when Emilia already started to squeeze him/her in a hug. But then the uncanny valley of seeing Subaru transform into herself hit her again, so she let go of him/her rather quickly.

"Ah! The Witch of E-… Oh, wait... Never mind, that's probably just the Lady Emilia form…"

Captain Marcos wasn't too familiar with unique transformations and was unaware of the Sage's unique connection to the most feared being in all of Lugunica. So, after at first instinctively flinching at the Sage's appearance and almost raising the alarm, he ended up associating this form with the half-elven Royal Candidate instead. When the Sage ran away, he barely caught a glimpse of it, unlike the present, when the visage of the "Definitely Not Witch of Definitely Not Envy" was right before him. In truth, there were some differences: first, the color of the hair, although the silver streaks were mixed in; second, the eyes, though the same purple color, were of the senpaku type characteristic of the Sage; third, while the color of the outfit matched the supposed garbs of the Jealous Witch, the outfit itself was made in the style of the Royal Candidate instead. So he was rather relieved that it wasn't the Witch who had visited them. If only he knew how close she was…

Speaking of Satella, she obviously wasn't there with him/her, rather she left on the second layer and let Subaru finish the jump by him/herself.

"Oh, ri-i-ight! I forgot to turn back!"

With a brief flash, the Sage returned to his familiar self.

Next to greet him was Beatrice, and unlike Emilia, she wasn't so visibly happy. Rather:

"The obnoxious brat! How dare you leave your spirit and run off to Od knows where, in fact!? Betty was so worried! She lost contact and could not..."

Before she could finish, her contractor scooped her up and:

"He-e-ey, Beako, don't worry. I just learned ano-o-other trick from my 'old friend' and found a new one!"

The old friend being his patron, of course. As for the new one:

"Argh, Betty is cheated on again, I suppose! How insolent! It's as if you don't even care about me anymore, in fact!"

The reaction of Great Spirit of Yin to the shining ball of light jumping out of his hair was... bad. So bad, in fact, that he could see genuine tears in her eyes.

Subaru's response to it was immediate. He instantly pulled her closer into a hug, pressing her face against his ribs.

"Be-e-eako, Be-e-eako, Be-e-eako. How could you sa-a-ay that? Do I not treat you with sweets every da-a-ay? Do I not tell you all the funny sto-o-ories? Do I not take you with me wherever I go-o-o? Do I not play ga-a-ames with you? Do I not shower you with affe-e-ection? Do I not hold you close every ni-i-ight? Why do you think I would do tha-a-at?"

"That's because…"

"Beca-a-ause..?"

"Because you love Betty, I suppose."

Somewhat reluctantly the spirit agreed with his point.

"Ri-i-ight, Beako, because I love you ve-e-ery much. You are very important to me, you kno-o-ow. Don't ever think that I would exchange you for anythin' or anyo-o-one else. These little guys have been stickin' to me like glu-u-ue lately. I really had nothin' to do with it. This one just followed me home... Can I ke-e-e-ep him?"

"Okay… you can keep those little brats around you, I suppose..."

The blonde spirit rather quickly mellowed in his hands.

"Da mastery of Lolimancy in action."

"He-e-ey! I swe-e-ear, Anastasia, sometimes I think you are the one responsible for these stu-u-upid rumors."

"Nah, ya are da one responsible for those rumors, Natsuki-kun. Some things 'bout 'holdin' close every night' sound rather questionable outta context, ya know."

"But you do-o-o know the context!"

"Sure, but think about everyone else seein' ya two bein' so cozy. Not to mention ya bein' cozy with da rest of yo immature associates."

"Urgh!"

"So where did you go to? And what were you doing, Subaru?"

"Oh, I just accidentally hopped dimensions, no biggie, Emilia-tan. As for what I was doing – I was just talking with… someone."

"Or maybe ya were doin' that someone, 'ey , Flugel?"

"No, if Subaru-kyun did that, he'd be gone for at least four hours, no?"

"Aye. Makes sense, catboy. They probably just ended it on a sloppy toppy."

"Sto-o-op!"

Both the Sage and his hidden companion had turned completely red (thankfully, no one saw Satella lick her lips at that comment). It was really unfortunate that there was no one to disprove this theory.

-----

The rest of the trip back to Priscilla's abode was relatively uneventful. Upon reaching their destination, the group decided to have a late supper and then retire for the night. Since Priscilla was rather picky with her servants, there were no personal stationed at this mansion, so it fell to Reinhard (who volunteered) to quickly prepare the meal. The result was incredibly delicious, courtesy of his many Divine Protections, which of course caused the others to compliment him on it (except for Felt, who liked to grumble about it being bland all the time).

Then people were assigned to their rooms, and eventually called it a night. The accommodations provided by the Vollachian Princess could only be described as premium. The guest rooms were incredibly big and incredibly lavish, more lavish than either of the Roswaal's mansions that Subaru had lived in, so lavish that Subaru almost regretted not finding a way to bump into Priscilla on his first day here instead. Okay, maybe not, that was an exaggeration, he wouldn't trade meeting Emilia-tan for it, even with everything that happened after he was brought to Mathers' Manor. Even more impressive was the fact that there were enough rooms to give everyone a single room. But, not everyone chose the single accommodation, as the Sage and his spirit retired together instead, but it was certainly enough for everyone else. There were some complaints about this arrangement, of course: from Shaula (who wanted to sleep with her Master), from Satella (who wanted the same) and, strangely enough, from Emilia (who had warmed up to the idea after the last time). But eventually, Subaru was able to convince them all to give in: Shaula was eventually persuaded to let go by saying that he'd be fine and by promising to hang out later; Satella was convinced to rest inside her Shadow Garden, both to keep the secrecy and to let her recover as much mana as possible (that was one of the perks of her home dimension); as for Emilia… well, she was still incredibly drunk, so she just fell asleep halfway through the conversation.

-----

The crew and the rest of the city slept peacefully. But not everyone in the Capital lay quietly in their beds, waiting for another day:

"Ah, you've finally arrived, Russell."

"Good night, Bordeaux. It took a while to get here from Picoutatte, I had to get the fastest ground dragon. I've already heard the news."

"About?"

"Both about 'the Sage' and the events in Priestella."

"And the meeting?"

"Yes, the meeting as well."

"So... your thoughts?"

"Highly dangerous. Very difficult to contain or destroy. Would be rather costly to eliminate. Had agents trailing them. They lost them a couple of times – there's some sort of non-detection magic involved – but they brought back sufficient enough information to go on."

"I have a lot to offer, Russell, you know that. What do you have?"

"They made some noise in the Capital, minor criminal charges, nothing to completely ruin them, but it might shake their reputation. Here's the report on their movements. And there's something else, something odd."

"Odd?"

"The assigned agents each had a magic detection metias on them. The whole time they were tracking them today, there were traces of heavy Yin magic use around the Sage."

"Yin magic? How much Yin magic are we talking about?"

"A Ginormous amount. Stupidly ginormous amount. Above Al tier."

"Might have something to do with Lady Bea-..."

"If it was in moderate doses, you might be able to attribute it to the spirit or even to that artifact he wields (yes I know about the blade), but there was too much mana involved. There's no way it's her or that blade. It's consistent amount, like it's some sort of channeled magic, not the typical spell. What's on your side?"

"Volcanica continued to stay in the palace. There have been no new edicts from the Divine Dragon, or really anything thus far. It almost seems as if he has fallen into a slumber."

"Slumber?"

"Yes. People have tried to call to him, but he was unresponsive."

"So it was impossible to strike at the source of Sage's legitimacy as of yet. Perhaps, the Dragon has his own plans that do not coincide with his so-called old friend?"

"That's what we had hoped for. But it seems that the Dragon won't be active for the time being. My colleagues believe that it just takes time for a being of mana like him to regain his strength."

"Don't look at it as a bad thing, it means that Sage's greatest benefactor will be inactive for a while. And that gives you a chance to act."

"Yes, I know. I have something in store for him. Thanks for the report."

"You'll owe me. Now, will I be invited to the meeting tomorrow?"

"Of course, and some of my associates will join you as well. I'm sure Miklotov is moving too, as does Gildark. Though I am not sure what exactly they have planned."

"As for the latter, he's with the Sage now, Bordeaux. It's in the report."

"Makes sense. I wonder what position will McMahon take though."

"We shall see. He's the most dangerous element – the path he chooses could sway the rest of the Council one way or the other."

"You shouldn't worry so much about the opinions of the Council, Russell. I do have a plan that doesn't involve them."

Saying that, the Mad Dog grinned in anticipation. And so, in the silence of that warm night, a malicious plot was hatched by those who would see the Sage undone.

Chapter Text

Today was a happy day! A re-e-eally happy day! Why? Because Emilia was getting married! With whom? With her dear Subaru, of course! In preparation for this majestic event, she spent all this morning getting ready: bathed, did her hair, applied makeup (which she did not do very often) and otherwise made herself look even prettier according to his Second Dad's sagely advice. Speaking of: Puck helped a lot, making sure she was absolutely perfect.

Wait... Puck is still asleep, is he not?"

Then came the dress, and that was another poem all in itself. It was stunning: a pure-white, multilayered, boatneck bridal gown covered in snowflakes made of lace. Additionally, each one of those snowflakes had small pieces of crystal glass woven into them for added effect: because the snowflakes were sewn to the dress only by their middle part, they reflected a myriad of colors each time you move. Much of the design was Puck's suggestion, as he was the one who proposed taking the image of the Witch of Glaciation and capitalizing on it. As he aptly described, it made her look like a real Ice Queen. It looked transcendent, divine, absolutely gorgeous, or just E.M.T. (or at least that's what Emilia thought that Subaru might say when he finally sees her). This massive dress was also coupled with relatively simple white gloves, a diadem covered in specially cultivated white flowers (symbolizing her role as a chosen Dragon Maiden and the Queen of Lugunica), a veil, and white shoes covered with similar looking crystals. Finally, she wore a green crystal on her neck; It slightly mismatched the rest of the outfit, but it was a symbol of her bond with her spirit-father, Puck.

But despite the beauty, this outfit had a few issues. The dress was a big and pretty... thing, something you'd see in a fairy tale, but… it was heavy… like re-e-eally heavy. And stuffy. And it was re-e-eally hot in it. The last part was manageable with a liberal application of magic, but the rest… Well, she would just have to endure it for Subaru's sake. That is, until after they spend their first night together. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do during this first night, only the fact that they should have one. Maybe it would be like a special dayte? If so, she couldn't wait! But either way, wouldn't this massive dress be uncomfortable to wear and get in the way? And wouldn't it get dirty walking on the city streets?

After spending nearly an hour trying to fit into the many layers of the dress, she finally left her room, only to meet her other father (who coincidentally was also a spirit):

-----

"Emilia, you're getting late!"

"I'm coming, Father Geuse!"

"What took you two so long?"

"Lia overslept again, and the dress fitting took ages! You really should've helped us!"

"Overslept? On her wedding day?"

"Sorry! I couldn't sleep at all last night. I was so worried!"

"Nervous?"

"Yes… quite a lot."

"Don't be. It will all be wonderful, Lia!"

"Yes, don't be. Breathe. It's a wondrous moment for the two of you."

"Ha-a-a… a-a-a-a-h. M-m-m! I'm ready!"

She took a deep breath, then exhaled, gathering her wits.

"Alright, let's go!"

Flanked by two of her father figures, Emilia marched forward to walk down the aisle at last.

-----

Once the three arrived near the temple where the wedding ceremony was taking place, Emilia felt something... odd.

"The door is closed. Are we late?"

"Only fashionably late, Lia. Let's just knock."

Knock-knock.

No response.

Knock-knock.

Nothing.

"What's going on?"

"Wait, if I have a wedding today, shouldn't I be escorted by the Royal Knights to here? And why were the streets so empty?"

She pressed her ear against the door.

"...Yes."

It was his voice! Subaru was there! What's happening?

Becoming impatient, the half-elf finally decided to use brute force. She was a bit afraid of breaking her gorgeous slippers, but her wedding with Subaru was far more important than some simple shoes.

Slam!

"Yes." "Yes." "Yes." "Yes."

More voices, now female.

"Let me in! Kya!"

Slam! After the second kick, the door finally yielded.

"Than I declare thee as husband and wives. Great Sage, thou may kisseth thy brides."

As she entered, Emilia saw a bizarre scene. First, there was a giant Divine Dragon at the aisle clearly acting as the priest for the ceremony, which Emilia found a bit funny, but that wasn't all too odd. Then there was her future husband (he looked rather handsome in his gorgeous locking black and orange garbs), which also wasn't weird. What was weird was that there were four other young women on the opposite side of the Sage, wearing gowns that looked suspiciously like the bridal ones.

The first was a silver-haired half-elf maiden who looked very akin to her, dawning a dress very similar to hers, except it was light-purple instead of white and was covered in stars made of lace rather than snowflakes. She looked the most radiant of the four and exuded an aura of authority and power. The second one was an oni with a long blue hair wearing a white, Kararagi-style yukata covered in light-blue flower patterns. She looked rather exotic by Lugunica standards, but certainly not the most outlandish of the four. The reward for the most exotic dress was in hands of the third girl – a brown-haired lady with a long ponytail in a white, tight-looking dress with V-shaped cut that did not even reached her knees. It was so odd that it was very clear that it was made according to the fashion trends of Subaru's homeland rather than Lugunica, Kararagi, Vollachia, or Gusteko. Finally, the fourth girl looked the most out of place here, though her dress was rather normal – just your typical white wedding dress made of high-quality silk (though it looked like a very carefully crafted piece, almost like it was self-made by the little girl). As for the reason she stood out... it was her age. She looked young, re-e-eally young, and yet, despite this, the former village girl with a short orange hair stood just as proudly as the other brides.

"Subaru, what's going on?"

As Emilia approached the aisle, the people stared at her with disapproving looks for whatever reason, she wasn't sure why. Only Mother Fortuna smiled back at her as she passed her, yet even she looked weird, her eyes were oddly empty.

"Mother Fortuna is alive? How? She… died…in my hands..."

Choosing to ignore that oddity, she quickly rushed toward the aisle.

"Sorry, I was just a tiny bit late. Why are they here?"

She pointed at the four maidens across the aisle.

"Why are YOU here?! I am here because I'm adorable, lovely, and shrewd. That's why Subaru likes me so much. Are you as cute as I am?"

Emilia was briefly taken aback by the retort of the little maid.

"Petra, I am supposed to marry Subaru here."

"Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. You are too slow, he doesn't need you anymore – he has us! Now get lost, you aren't welcome at the Master's Grand Wedding! What can you even offer him? I know almost everything about the Master's home. He can have fun chatting with me all day long! Are you as cool as I am?"

"What do you mean I'm not welcome!?"

Emilia didn't take Petra's backtalk to heart, but the words of the Scorpio apprentice did provoke her anger quite a bit.

"Why do you think Subaru-kun would marry you? I worked harder than anyone to earn his love, and I'll continue to be a good wife for him until the day I die. In fact, I will die trying to protect him. Are you as diligent as I am?"

"Why do you think my love would want you? Every moment, every breath, and every heartbeat of mine is dedicated to him. I love him fully, completely, eternally, everlastingly, obsessively and unconditionally, without asking anything in return. He knows that, and he loves me back just as much. Are you as devoted to him as I am?"

"Why do all four of them talk in such an odd and similar way?"

"That's because… Because… Because he loves me, and I love him back… I think…"

"Love YOU!? ARE YOU SERIOUS!?"

Her knight, previously silent, suddenly shouted. His sudden words slammed into her like a mad ground dragon. Emilia looked well and truly stupefied.

"Why would I still love you? It's been a DECADE! Sure, I may have had something for you once, but I was just carried by my stubbornness for the last eight years. It was a sunk cost fallacy, hoping you would at least act respectfully toward my past feelings for you. And you didn't! And you know what? I grew tired of your bullshit!"

"A decade?"

His tone suddenly changed as he began to mockingly parodying her voice:

"I wonder what are those feelings inside me?

"Oh, I will definitely marry you one day, just let me figure out how I feel about you, Subaru!

"Subaru, please help me! I don't know what to do. You know, I always rely on you for everything!

"Subaru, I don't understand, why do people hate me? I didn't do anything to them! I do not do anything at all in general! I just sit and study how to be a good Queen!

"I am tired of this. I do not need you anymore."

His voice returned to normal as he uttered these last words.

"He doesn't need me? But he had promised he would wait as long as I needed to understand my feelings for him…"

"You do not need me…? But I need…"

"BEGONE! I don't want you in my life!"

"But didn't you say you were with me because I helped you? Back when you first arrived at the Capital? Why are you leaving me now?"

She didn't want him to leave! No-no-no-no-no! Especially not now, when she was finally ready to be eternally his!

Desperately, she tried to latch on any reason to keep him. Yet these were the wrong words to say.

"Yes, and I helped you back, saving your worthless ass from the Witch Cult. We are even. Now we can end this, just like you wanted at the beginning of all this mess, after you left me in the Capital, broken and alone!"

If his first words were like being run over, these words were like being stabbed. Not just a single stab, more like a dozen. They were hurtful, very hurtful. In a cruel twist of irony, he responded in the same way she had back then. And that made her regret about abandoning him there even more. Her eyes quickly filled with tears, and her makeup started to smear, ruining hours of hard work.

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"

But even her tearful sorries didn't stop him as he made another merciless strike:

"What did you expect?! You did nothing, achieved nothing, saved no one. Why then do you still want my love?"

"But we… but we did a lot together… We've saved a lot of people, and..."

"So you truly are delusional."

"What? I don't understand…"

"Look around."

For a brief moment, she couldn't understand what he meant, but then she obeyed his order and then saw it: corpses. Many corpses. Every guest at this wedding was dead. Some were frozen solid, some looked burned, some were mutated beyond the point of recognition, and some were simply butchered with blades. Among them were her adopted parents: Mother Fortuna's body was covered in ice and had a hole in her chest, just as she remembered it during her last moments; Father Geuse was much worse – his body was broken and burned almost beyond recognition, his now empty eyes, which used to be gentle and kind, were now twisted with malice and obsession. And Puck: well, her Spirit Father was simply gone, his green crystal broken.

"But, Mother Fortuna, Geuse, and Puck…"

No, it wasn't happening, they won, saved them, brought them all back, unfroze her people!

"Did we? How? Why do I not remember how?"

"As I said, you did nothing, achieved nothing, saved no one. All you did was create more corpses, ruin more lives, including mine. Just like a real Witch. You even failed to achieve anything of note during the Royal Selection."

As he said this, Emilia instinctively reached for her diadem.

"Is it even real? I do not remember winning or my coronation..."

"A-a-ah!"

The regalia slipped from her head and fell to the ground. As it hit the ground, it shattered into a thousand pieces.

"It's made of ice? But I thought…"

"Nothing you ever naively believed in is real. You wasted all this time we could've had together by twiddling your thumbs and doing nothing. You are truly slothful, Emilia."

His last words to her seemed strange. Turning her eyes away from the gruesome sight, she turned back towards him, wanting to ask what he meant. But she was met with even more horrifying sight: nothing existed anymore, not the church, not the Dragon, nor the brides. Only he remained. But he wasn't as she remembered him. Her beloved knight's form looked vile, twisted, malicious. His hair was loose, the face was covered in scars that looked suspiciously like they were self-inflicted, his limbs and fingers were bent at unnatural angles, and his posture was hunched.

And then she saw them. Arms. Made of shadows, they sprouted from his back.

"They almost like the ones that Father Geuse had. Why does Su-…"

One of them suddenly lunged for her neck.

"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h!"

-----

"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h!"

Emilia leaped out of bed, covered in a cold sweat.

She did not have nightmares all to often, but she'd had a few before. Most of them were about that cursed day when she lost her mother and froze her people. There were others: one where Subaru left her for one reason or another, a dream where her knight died in her arms while protecting her, and one where she was somehow possessed by the Witch of Envy and brought the Second Great Calamity upon the world.

"Just a nightmare, just a nightmare, just a nightmare, just a nightmare… I'm okay, I'm okay... Breathe… Ha-a-a… a-a-a-h.

After calming a little she began to recount her dream.

"Wedding, four brides: Satella, Rem, Shaula, and… Why Petra? Subaru rejecting me. Corpses of Geuse, Fortuna, and everyone else… And then, Subaru… and his hands… I need to write it somewhe-... Ow! Why does my head hurt do much?"

After the events at the Sanctuary, she began chronologuing her dreams, both good and bad, so she will certainly remember this one too.

"Wait, where am I?"

After quickly wiping the lingering tears from her eyes, she began to look around. She did not recognize this place.

"Wait, is it another dream? Subaru said that having a dream within another one wasn't too uncommon."

And that thought made her panic once again. She bolted out of her room, hoping to find someone or something familiar. But there was nothing and no one, just long, empty corridors to the left and right. She picked a direction at random and began running.

-----

"It is a dream, isn't it? I don't know this place, and this corridor just keeps going and goi-"

"A-a-a-h!"

"Emilia-tan! Where are you running to?"

The two of them nearly collided. Thankfully, her knight reacted quickly enough to catch her.

"Oh, Subaru. You're here! I thought I was stuck in an odd dream. Wait, are you real? Or are you also a part of my dream?"

"I would like to be a part of your dream, preferably a happy one, or maybe even a more spicy one eventually… But that's neither here nor there. Well, I can pinch you to wake you up, but you would probably won't like that. So, let's figure it out this way: close your eyes for a moment, imagine me gone, wait for the five seconds, and then open your eyes."

"Okay."

Following his advice, Emilia closed her eyes, imagined that she never met him here in this corridor, and opened her eyes after a bit.

"Subaru?"

He was gone.

"Oh, no! That means it really is a dream, and…"

"Boo!"

"A-a-ah! Subaru-u-u! You dunderhead!"

She almost leaped from the fright after she suddenly heard his voice right behind her. It didn't take Emilia long to realize that he had just played a prank on her.

"Sorry, Emilia-tan, but that was too funny not to do. Still, that means that you are certainly not dreaming."

"Why?"

"Well, you are aware that you were likely inside a dream, right? That's called lucid dreaming. The thing is, when you are aware of your dream, you can change it to suit your liking or even end it with just a thought. For example, you could just change this scene from a mansion to a tranquil meadow, or you could make me wear even less clothing."

He nodded in the direction of the towel wrapped around his hips. Speaking of which:

"Subaru, why are you half-naked?"

She had been so afraid before that she hadn't even paid attention to it, but now she couldn't help but stare at his naked torso. Now that he was so close and wearing nothing but a towel, she felt oddly uncomfortable.

"He's re-e-eally handsome... I've never noticed it before… What's… what is happening to me? Why can't I look away?"

It took Emilia all of her mental fortitude to turn her eyes away from him. She then even half-turned her whole body away from him, just so her eyes would stop trailing him. And yet, she still occasionally peeked at him in her peripheral vision. Moreover, she could also feel a strange nausea in her stomach.

"I was bathing."

"Oh..."

At this point, she forced herself to look at the nearby wall instead.

"Emilia-tan, why are you so red?"

"I… I… I mean, isn't it rude to stare…?"

"Heh, I don't mind you looking, actually."

"You don't?"

His lack of objection made her instinctively turn back toward him and:

"Oh no! Not again! Why do I keep staring! And why does his chest look so…"

"I mean, you're giving me quite the view too. I'd have to thank Priscilla for choosing this nightie for you. It's almost as if she knew something like this would happen. I feel like we've both just hit the 'Accidental Pervert' trope here."

And that's when she looked down and finally noticed that she wasn't all that different either, standing before him in nothing but a white, silken nightgown. There wasn't even any underwear on her either. And there were also traces of her sweat on said nightgown. Quite a lot of those, actually.

"Wa-a-ah! Don't look!"

She immediately rushed toward him and covered his eyes with her palms.

"What are you doing, Emilia-tan?"

"Covering your eyes so you won't stare!"

"But I didn't divert my eyes from your face even once! And that's a big challenge, given how sexy you are, Emilia-tan! Besides, this nightwear is not transparent, just really tight looking."

He did not sound all that convincing.

"But you just said you've seen everything!"

"I mean, yes, but I've been on 'Wake Up da Princess' duty," he said the last bit with Garfiel's weird accent, "for almost a year now. I know what you look like in your sleepwear, and some of those pieces were somewhat revealing… You have a very sexy figure."

And that answer led Emilia to further conclusions:

"Subaru-u-u, don't say that you were ogling me while I slept!"

"I wasn't!"

That lie was so obvious that even Emilia immediately picked up on it.

"Urgh! Subaru-u-u! Pervert!"

"Says the one groping me this very moment."

"Ah! Sorry!"

While trying to cover his eyes, she accidentally pressed her body against his and began leaning against his chest with her free hand. Well, not leaning, but more like unintentionally caressing. Oh yeah, and her eyes also accidentally locked onto said chest again. Realizing this, she immediately recoiled, covering her privates with her hands while desperately forcing her eyes away from his profile again.

"Besides, you've probably seen me half-naked a couple of times too, no doubt. Haven't you?"

"Ehm…"

She had, usually when she had to treat his injuries. She had just never felt ashamed looking at him before. But now...

"See?"

"Gr-r-r. Dunderhead."

Overwhelmed by intense emotions, she resorted to angry pouting and softly punching his chest. Initially, that is:

"You are groping me again, Emilia-tan."

"Just… Urgh… I…"

She did not know what to do or say. Something inside her drew her toward him. At the same time, this feeling filled her with immense shame.

"Is this also a part of loving someone? Am I supposed to feel like this?"

"Sorry, Emilia-tan, but the 'grope-me' ticket is Tella's prize. Also, that's not the first time you've been handsy either. Just the last night…"

"I… I don't remember the last night. Were we doing something nau-... O-o-o-o-ow, my head hurts so much!"

Emilia tried to concentrate, hoping to remember the events of the previous evening. That was a mistake – it felt like her head was fighting back against her! Or, well, fight back against itself, technically. The consequences of the last night suddenly intensified in the form of such an intense migraine that Emilia began to lose her balance. Thankfully, Subaru was quick to catch her.

"Oh, that looks bad. Well, it makes sense, you were totally hammered yesterday! Of course you would have a drunken amnesia and a nasty hangover. Surprisingly enough, I don't. Amnesia, I mean, a slight hangover is there, but the bath fixed most of it. Maybe it's because I didn't have any special Sage whiskey, just some cheap Capital swill?"

As he said this, he began to gently patting her head. Something that quickly filled her mind with feelings of comfort and tranquility. Gradually, the pain in her head subsided somewhat.

"There, there. Alright, no more thinking too hard for a bit, Emilia-tan. Just relax. Better?"

"Mhm."

It still hurt somewhat, but at least she could stand on her feet.

"Anyway, I think you need to take a bath too. Not just to ease the hangover, but also… well… how should I say it… you look filthy and smell… worse than usual."

"Huh?"

"Yeah. I don't really mind, but I think E.M.M. should stand for 'Emilia-tan Maji Megami', not the 'Emilia-tan Maji Mess'."

She immediately raised one of her arms to sniff her own armpit. For a brief moment, she thought he was exaggerating her stench, but…

"Urgh! You're right…"

The smell was so pungent that it made her head spin again (but for a different reason).

"That, and your hair is a completely disheveled."

Suddenly becoming self-conscious, she turned her eyes away from him again. For some reason, she did not want to look ugly in Subaru's eyes.

"Yeah… I'll take a bath."

"Beako is currently in there, but she probably won't not mind. See you, Emilia-tan!"

"Wait, where are the baths?"

"Further down this corridor on the right. There's a sign, so you won't miss it."

"This place is re-e-eally confusing. I got lost here before bumping into you. Where are you going?"

"Well, I probably need to put on something other than this towel. But then I'd be in the lobby."

"Lobby?"

"A room right before the the main hall where Priscilla's 'throne' is."

"Hm, have you ever been here before, Subaru?"

"Uh... No, of course not. It's just good spatial awareness. Definitely."

Emilia didn't buy it. Still, after noticing that Subaru did not want to talk about it, she decided to drop the subject.

"Okay, Subaru. I will see you in a bit."

"See you."

-----

It didn't took long for Emilia to find the baths. Just as Subaru said, the Great Spirit of Yin was there.

"Beatrice, would you mind if I joined you?"

"Betty doesn't mind, I suppose. As one of the closest people to Betty's Subaru, you are not unwelcome here."

"Thanks!"

After discarding her nightgown she descended into the water.

"M-m-m. It's good. Very warm."

"Betty was the one who reactivated the mana stones this morning. You should be grateful, in fact."

Just like at Roswaal's Mansion, the warm water was provided by mana crystals embedded within.

"I am. Thanks!"

So Emilia began to quietly wash herself. Beatrice was quiet too, though the half-elf wasn't sure what was currently on the Great Spirit's mind. She was sure what was on her mind, though – she still couldn't get the image of her knight's naked chest out of her head! As a result, the bathroom quickly became awkwardly silent.

"Beatrice, do you need any help? I can help you brush your back or wash your hair."

"Betty wouldn't mind, I suppose. Although I have a question: what caused such a change in attitude?"

"Hm-m-m? I just want to help."

"Don't lie. You're terrible at it, I suppose. What do you want? You're being too polite with Betty today. Clearly you want something in return, in fact."

"But I am always polite with you."

"Ordinarily, you try to be, but due to your foolishness, your politeness is more insulting than respectful, in fact. Unlike now. Tell me what you need."

"It's… it's about Subaru…"

"What is that you want from Betty's contractor?"

"I… I think I'm in love with him…"

"What?"

-----

She quickly explained what had been happening to her lately.

"So, you are saying that after realizing that you might have a competition, you finally understood that you need him and want to take action, I suppose?"

"Yes…"

"Was that the reason you sought his company back at the tower, in fact?"

"Yes… I think."

"And that you even had a nightmare in which you failed to win his love?"

"Yes… It was a re-e-eally confusing dream..."

"And you can't even stop thinking about him?"

"Yes…"

With each "yes," she turned redder and redder.

"Betty understands. If you really want to know the meaning of that dream, Betty can explain it, in fact. Dreams are merely a representations of one's desires and fears. In your case, your desire is to be with Betty's Subaru, and your fear is being too late to do so, I suppose. As for the twisted appearance and hands at the end, I think you correlate the Archbishop of Sloth (the driven mad Geuse) with Betty's contractor."

"Is it because of the Witch Factor of Sloth?"

"Precisely. Although Sloth alone is not the end of it, in fact. You are afraid that the Witch Factors will make him walk the path of madness, I suppose. It is not an unfounded fear – Betty's afraid of it too."

"But what about the others at the aisle?"

"You are simply afraid of the competition, I suppose. You believe that they are more worthy of his heart than you. A foolish thought, in fact."

"But they are…"

"Shush! Silence. I swear, this self-deprecating nature of you both is so incredibly annoying. Subaru loves you because he sees things in you that are lovable, in fact. Stop looking at the others! See in yourself what Subaru sees in you!"

"But what does Subaru see in me?"

"Only what he keeps hammering into your empty head everyday, in fact! You probably think of it as an empty chatter, but Betty's Subaru means most of the things he says to you!"

"He means it…?"

"Yes! If you want to understand his love for you, then talk to him. Listen to every word he says and try to understand what he's trying to tell you, even if he sounds flippant, I suppose. Then accept it, show him that you like listening to him, that you like what he says, and that you like being with him. You do like being with him, do you not?"

"I am..."

"Then show him that his insistent flirting and endless compliments are working on you, in fact. Then, step by step, show him that you love him back, not in words, in actions. Lend him your hand, provide him your compassion when he needs it. Show him that you accept him no matter what he does, try to understand his deepest wishes and hurts. And when he understands that you feel the same way he does, say it, three simple words: 'I LOVE YOU!' That's how you would have to win Subaru's heart, I suppose."

"Beatrice… what you said is…" "…genius"

"Way too theatrical, Betty knows, in fact. For better or worse, Betty has way too much knowledge when it comes to romance drama, I suppose. For whatever reason, Mother liked to study relationships. Or maybe these kinds of books were Mother's guilty pleasure... Just don't tell Betty's Subaru about it!"

"I won't. Thank you, Beako. It actually made me understand."

The spirit's words inspired Emilia. She still struggled to think of what she would have to do, but she now at least had a general idea. Outside of just trying to spend more time with him, that is.

"Oh… good… And that is still Beatrice for you, girl."

"Oh, sorry!"

"Still, there's some absolute truth to your dream. You should consider improving your pace. Subaru will not live forever."

"Right, right. That's why I was asking for your advice, Beatrice."

"But of course, asking Betty about it was the optimal solution, I suppose. Uncharacteristically wise insight coming from you. Now, help Betty scrub her back, in fact."

"Mhm, sure."

-----

In the end, they finished their bathing session together. Emilia kept thinking about Beatrice's advice: some things she realized that she was already doing, but she was clearly lacking in other areas. Nevertheless, the spirit's words managed to inspire her. The task ahead of her seemed daunting, but she would try hard to be the person worthy of Subaru's love! And by doing that they will finally be happy!

Afterward, they went back to the bedroom to get back their clothes. Well, Emilia went to her room instead rather than the one that Beatrice and Subaru had, but it was actually just the next one to the right. She had to utilize the help of her contracted lesser spirits to freshen up her garments (as they smelled just as vile as she did prior to bathing), but after doing that and changing into them, she rejoined the blonde spirit.

"What else do you want? Do you not see that Betty is reading, in fact?"

Where the spirit managed to procure a book here Emilia did not know. Yet, even though she didn't like to disrupt the spirit's hobby, she had to ask for one more favor:

"One more thing, please. Could you help me find where Subaru went to?"

"Sigh, alright, I suppose, Betty will help you. Betty has no trouble finding Subaru, provided he's not too far away. After all, we have our contract, in fact."

-----

"Oh, hey, you two! I see you freshened up!"

"Mhm! How do I smell now, Subaru?"

"*sniff* A-a-a-a-h-h-h. A wonderful lavender fragrance. Ten out of ten, E.M.T.!"

Proud of such a high score, she sat beside him.

"M-m-m! You smell very good too. And I like the way your hair looks."

"Oh! A counterattack by Emilia-tan! Very effective, I'm touched! Though it's just a wet hair. It takes time to dry before I can make my old hairstyle again."

"I think you look very handsome when you wear your hair down like that."

"Wa-a-ah! Emilia-tan, you are playing unfair! I'm supposed to be the one showering you with compliments!"

"But I want to compliment you too! You look re-e-eally dashing today!"

"Sigh, Betty's going to raid the pantry for sweets."

Emilia grew worried for a second that she was overdoing it, but then she noticed the spirit winking at her and realized she was just giving the two of them some space.

"Thanks, Betty. I promise I will buy you some more sweets later!"

"Mhm, just don't eat too much candy, Beako. Your teeth might hurt otherwise."

"Foolish contractor, there's no such thing as too much candy, in fact! See you soon."

"See you soon!" "See you soon!"

Both Emilia and her knight replied in unison.

"So, Subaru, you said you still remember what happened last night. Can you tell me?"

"Oh, of course, Emilia-tan. It all started…"

-----

They spent the rest of the morning chatting. First, Subaru told her all about the last night (and made her blush with embarrassment more than a few times because of her shame over her drunken escapades). Then, she decided to inquire more about his home village, Japan, and requested his help in understanding some of his new inventions that he was bringing to Lugunica, which he gladly explained. Emilia took the advice of Beatrice to heart and actively participated in the conversation, showing an immense interest in everything he said. Not that she needed to pretend to be interested – he was saying very fascinating things, so much so that the image of his naked torso had finally left her mind. Okay, maybe it didn't fully leave, but at least it wasn't the only thing on her mind. Then, they each had a mug of beer to help with their hangovers. That made her a bit tipsy, but at least her headache was completely gone. After that, they did each other's hair – as it turned out, from now on she could ask him to style her hair (or ask to make hair for him) anytime she might want. Her attempt at replicating his usual hairstyle was, of course, way worse than the perfect braid he made for her, she blamed it on her lack of experience. But even that motivated her: from now on, she promised herself that she would style his hair every day, both to get closer to him and to get more practice.

Overall, she thought it went well. They both seemed to have a lot of fun. Emilia certainly did. She had some doubts, but she hoped that her knight still liked hanging out with her. Sadly, as Subaru liked to say: "All good things must come to an end eventually." After two hours of this impromptu dayte (or at very least it felt like a dayte) another guest of Priscilla's manor joined them in the lobby.

-----

"Lady Emilia, Subaru, good morning."

"Good morning!"

"Hey, Rein."

Reinhard was the fourth person to wake up today.

"Am I intruding?"

"No, not really."

"A bit, but it's fine…"

"Emilia-tan?"

"Oh, sorry, Reinhard. I… I think that was a re-e-eally rude of me to say. It's just that Subaru has a lot of things to do today, and so I just wanted to spend a bit more with him while he is not busy."

"No offense taken, Lady Emilia. I see that you are a bit busy."

She was still in process of fine-tuning Subaru's hairdo.

"Hm, does that mean you really like spending time with me, Emilia-tan?"

"Yes, I do."

"Woah? No, denial? No going all tsundere? No, being bashful as usual?"

"M-m-m? I always liked spending time with you, Subaru."

"Wow! You actually went ahead and said it! Did I suddenly gain more reputation points, and Emilia-tan started to like me more? Was the 'naked chest' event that effective? Alright, hopefully this will finally set that route!"

"Hm-m-m, Subaru is rambling again… Oh, right! I need to know more things about him!"

"What are the reputation points?"

One of the many odd things about Subaru was his peculiar mannerisms. While Emilia knew the meaning of some of them, she was no match for Beatrice. Still, one of the things she decided to do was to try to catch up to the spirit in that aspect.

Subaru, in the meantime, looked strangely bashful.

"Oh, crap! I should've not said that. Thank God no one here knows what otome games are, otherwise, I'd be a laughingstock… Wait, Tella, you do...? When did I tell-...? Ah, curse you, past-me! Stop laughing, Tella-tan! Yes, I like cutesy things and high school drama! What of it!?"

Puzzled by more foreign words, Emilia tilted her head in confusion.

"Alright, I'll shut up before I drill a hole in the ground from embarrassment."

"H-m-m, I think I'll go to the kitchen and prepare the breakfast…"

"Oh, good. He's leaving us alone. That means..."

"Wait for me, Reinhard! I have a recipe I haven't tried since I came here."

"Oh, no! Subaru-u-u, I wanted to spend more time with you!"

"What kind of recipe?"

"A soup. It's one that my mother loved to make. Technically, you're supposed to make it primarily in the winter, but I suddenly have an urge to have some right now."

"Of course, I'd be happy to cook with you."

"Wait, I have an idea…"

"Ehm, I want to join too, Subaru!"

"Of course, Emilia-tan, help's always welcome. Alright, let's get cooking!"

-----

It took them around four more hours to figure out Subaru's home dish. In the meantime, the dinning room was quickly filling up. It was late morning at this point, and people were getting hungry. The reason for the delay was due to the rarity of the necessary ingredients. Her knight was planning to make "Zosui" – an exotic soup from his odd hometown. It took some time for them to make "Dashi" (which was the primary ingredient), as they spent a lot of time finding a proper replacement for "Kombu". In truth, it was a lot of foreign words that neither the Sword Saint nor the Royal Candidate understood, yet Emilia did not mind that because she was caught up in Subaru's enthusiasm. That was her reason for being invested in cooking (and definitely not a desire to be with him more; no, sir!), even if her use to the Sage was limited to chopping vegetables. Eventually, they finished, and using her previous experience as a maid, Emilia organized the plate serving (even though she wasn't very good at it).

"Zosui is ready! Have a taste."

"Mmm, I see that the three of you worked very hard this mo-o-orning. Well, let us ta-a-aste it! Given the other dishes that Subaru-kun knows, it is undoubtedly deli-..."

"Oi, you clown. Shut up and eat. I'm hungry."

"Felt-sama…"

"What? You were the ones who delayed breakfast."

"It was a re-e-eally daunting task. But we managed. So how is it, Felt?"

"*slurp* M-m-m… Good, Nee-chan. You three did well. Much better than what Rein normally makes."

"Nah, Reinhard's food is good! Yesterday's dinner was awesome!"

"You don't get it, Nii-chan, Reinhard's cooking isn't bad, per se. It tastes good, yes, but it's all bland and samey. He just makes your typical restaurant cooking. And in restaurants, it's just some expensive spices are what make the dishes taste good. On their own, they're kinda meh. And I really just want to eat something both simple and nutritious, not some posh restaurant stuff. Like this soup, for example. What's in it?"

"Well, it's rice, veggies, and chicken broth seasoned with soy sauce. It was kinda a pain in the ass to make. First, I wanted to make it vegan and make it with kombu, but then we had an issue of finding it here. I thought I could use one of the river kelps called… How was it called again, Rein?"

"Iris' Tears. A rare ingredient. Comes from Vollachia. Very flavorful."

"Yeah, that. But it was so bitter that I just scrapped it and went with chicken instead. Then, we had difficulties making the soy sauce..."

While everyone else was still eating, Subaru described in great detail every difficulty he encountered while making this soup. Predictably, half of the words he used were not understood by anyone except him, but essentially, it was this: "There's an ingredient back home that usually goes into this soup, but it isn't prevalent here. So, we went over various alternatives to find a good substitute. And then there was another ingredient just like that. And another. And another… The resulting soup is quite mediocre and tastes nothing like the one that Mother used to make."

The thing is, the soup was good, so Subaru's self-flagellation was re-e-eally unfounded. It probably came down to Reinhard's many Divine Protections making it tastier, but Emilia still felt like she would have liked it regardless. So, she'll definitely ask Subaru to make more Zosui in the future.

The dish was very well received. Everyone praised the three of them, even though Emilia herself thought that she didn't do much to deserve it. Anastasia even wanted to buy the recipe under pretenses of introducing it globally, but Subaru quickly forbade her from doing so, claiming that he would patent it just like the mayo, much to the Merchant Princess's dismay.

-----

The plates were emptied rather quickly. Then, the business came up:

"Sir Marcos, not to be impolite, but what are you doing here?"

"Lady Emilia, this was a matter already discussed yesterday with the other Royal Candidates while you and your knight were absent. In short, I switched sides. I no longer see the Council's plans as a rational course of action."

"Oh, that means you are on our side?"

"Yes, I am on your side."

"Wonderful! Does that mean Subaru managed to sway many other Elders too?"

"Probably. Many people on the Council were swayed by your words, Sir Natsuki."

"Good, but frankly even a third of them won't be enough. Still, I have an idea. It's very likely they're still stuck in a legislative stalemate. That's where Plan B comes into play…"

Chapter Text

"… That's where Plan B comes into play. Though just plan B alone probably won't be enough. We have to think of plan C, and even potentially a plan D too."

"What are those plans, Subaru?"

In Emilia's opinion, Subaru was incredibly good when it came down to making plans. There were other great schemers in her Camp, such as Roswaal and Otto. Yet Subaru was in a whole other tier. Somehow he had an answer to every problem that they had faced so far. It was as if he could anticipate what was about to happen in advance. So, when it came to planning stuff, those three were in charge. And they often took things way too far. Honestly, that was rather frustrating. Why? Because Emilia, despite trying her best, was unfortunately not smart enough to understand all these plans, schemes, and machinations and was often kept in the dark about them (like during the Sloth's assault on the Roswaal's mansion or during the events in the Sanctuary), which was rather hurtful, truth be told.

"Well, good question, Emilia-tan. But… I haven't come up with those yet."

"Wait. Did I mishear ya, or did ya say ya have no plans for today?"

"Nope. No plans."

"Natsuki-kun! What da fuck?!"

"What? Why are you looking so angry, Anastasia?"

Emilia didn't understand either. What was the need in creating another plan exactly? Didn't they already explained Subaru's grand plans to the Council? She knew Anastasia was a businesswoman and, as a result, was rather meticulous in her projects, but it re-e-eally felt like an overreaction.

"I thought ya'd have a plan figured out and ready by this point!"

"That's what I thought we would be doing right now!"

"Argh, shit! Fuck!" she slammed her fist against the table, "I really wanna strangle ya right now, Natsuki-kun!"

Now it definitely felt like an overreaction. Why would Anastasia want to hurt Emilia's beloved knight? The half-elf moved a bit more forward instinctively in order to protect him.

"Why are you so outraged? We still have enough ti-"

"No, we don't, Felt! I've already organized a second meetin'! We need to come up with a plan within two hours!"

"Ah… I see. So that is the reason."

"Then 'tis your fault, not his, she-fox. You were the one being hasty."

"Shut it, ya whore!"

Everyone (including Emilia) was rather surprised by the sudden outburst. And yet, Emilia's former political opponent did not yield. The Priscilla's Yang Sword was drawn and:

"Or what? You were the one responsible for this situation. You are the one who will now have to pay for it."

The room went silent. The atmosphere in the room was heating up. Both due to the argument and literally, as the blade began to warm up the air around it. While the half-elf was sure that Priscilla was merely showing off her strength and didn't plan to actually cut Anastasia down with that sword of hers, the atmosphere was still tense. But Emilia wasn't afraid, though, and knew how to force those two nincompoops to break it up. Countering the heat with her own magic, she stepped between them.

"Please, both of you, calm down. We are limited in time, but if we work hard and combine our ideas, we will definitely figure something out. I trust that everyone here will do their best! Please, Anastasia, calm down. And you, Priscilla, please remove your sword."

After a moment, they both complied.

"Thank you, Emilia-tan. And damn, that 'Everyone here will do their best!' sounded so-o-o cute! E.M.T.!"

Looking rather grateful for her interference, her knight smiled at her. She froze. Previously, having her knight shower her with compliments wasn't unusual. In fact, it had been a daily occurrence before. She had grown so used to it to the point that she stopped paying it any mind. But now, his words and that smile... they simply stupefied her. Her hand squeezed his instinctively. Their eyes accidentally locked. She felt heat spreading across her face and something ticklish in her stomach. An image of him topless once again resurfaced in her mind, and...

"Oh no! Not now! We have a serious meeting! Damn it, Subaru, stop looking so handsome, you dunderhead!"

She quickly broke the eye contact and began staring at the floor while desperately trying to prevent her thoughts from going in that direction.

In the meantime, her knight continued:

"Yeah, so incredibly cute. An angel. Right, back to the meeting. Ahem! Well, Anastasia, if it's any consolation, I have a couple of ideas that might work."

"WHAT IDEAS?"

Trying to latch onto any thought that didn't involve Subaru's half-naked appearance, the half-elf asked, no, screamed this question out loud.

"Huh? You sound uncharacteristically curious today, Emilia-tan. I'm glad, you asked. But first – a history lesson."

"Natsuki-kun, skip da small talk."

"No, the small talk is important to understand my idea."

"Let him speak."

"Fine! Continue."

"As some of you know, I'm not from around here. I was born quite far away. You see in my home cou-..."

"Far as in Gusteko, Kararagi, Vollachia, or…?"

"Further."

"Beyond the Great Waterfall, in fact."

"Yes, Subaru said before that he is from beyond the Waterfall."

Just this morning, he was describing to Emilia his home country. Yes, just this morning, when he appeared before her wearing only a towel and…

"No! Not again!"

And there it was. Her mind once again returned to that event.

Meanwhile, everyone else was unaware of the plight of the young, love-stricken half-elf girl and continued talking. It was this talking that Emilia tried to focus upon, just so this sudden obsession of hers would stifle.

"Eh, close enough. Let's just call it 'Beyond the Great Waterfall' for now. Easier to explain."

"Wait, you aren't just joking around? You are really from the Beyond?"

The Merchant Princess quickly pulled out her notebook and began zealously scribbling something in it. The remains of her anger were instantly replaced by obsessive, maniacal curiosity. Anastasia was odd. Re-e-eally odd. Emilia once heard Puck say that: "The eyes of a genius and a madman are one and the same". She'd met a couple of people like this (her Subaru was a prime example), and yet she was still surprised by these kinds of oddities every time they happened. And maybe she was a bit odd, too.

"Well, there are no winds of untruth. So…"

"Insanity, then?"

"What makes you think that, slum rat? The common- the Sage is clearly unlike all the others. He has knowledge, mannerisms, and skills that are not of any known country. Wouldn't it be easy to access then that he's not from this land?"

"Why are you defending him, Priscilla? Maybe Nii-chan really went bonkers."

"Why not? Besides, my previous jester claimed the same thing. And he was rather similar to him."

"Okay, okay, please stop arguing. Just consider the possibility of me being not from here. Not from this… place."

"I mean, considerin' everythin' else that's batshit insane 'bout ya, this kinda makes sense, Flugel. Tho everyone from da old crew already knows ya're an outsider."

Everyone present nodded in agreement with Reid's words.

"Mhm. That's where all the cool references from Master's world come from."

"Okay, back to the point I want to make. You see, my homeland used to be in a kinda similar way – a bunch of stupidly rich, posh, 'honorable' nobles (we called them samurai) were exploiting the peasants and quarreling with one another. Among them was one leader: the shogun, not a king per se, but rather a powerful warlord who had the strength to keep the others in line. As for the king, or more precisely the Emperor, he was just a token figure, someone you should bow to but not actually obey. Kinda similar to the situation we find ourselves in right now. But then, just over a dozen years or so, the shogun and his samurai lost their power, and Emperor Mutsuhito, or Emperor Meiji, once again became the true ruler of the land. To help him lead, he chose followers not by birth and blood but by their merit and wealth, thus replacing the noble class with the so-called bourgeoisie. We call this event 'The Meiji Restoration'."

As her Subaru kept talking, Emilia suddenly started smiling as she realized something:

"This is what we were talking about this morning! Does this mean I helped him figure out what we will do today?"

Emilia found comfort in that. She wasn't useless, she had actually helped him a lot, as it turned out! Or at least she had helped somewhat. Listening to him as he was planning things was helping, right?

"So what you're saying there, Natsuki-kun, is that in your country, the merchant class gradually overtook the nobility? Did that happen everywhere in your homeland? I mean, there must be some other neighboring countries with different regimes where you were born, too, correct?"

"Yes, of course there are neighboring countries. Neighboring by sea, but… Oh, right, you have no concept of the sea here, right… Well, let's just skip that explanation. As for whether or not it happened globally – not exactly, not everywhere. Some places are still very religious, some focused on freedom and trade, some places are very stratocratic and dictatorial, some are more worker-community focused, and some are somewhere in between."

"We have something similar in here as well, Subaru-sama. Kararagi, as everyone knows, is ruled by the merchant class. Why would that foreign history lesson help us? "

"In a very primitive form, yes, Crusch, there are a lot of similarities between us. However, our politics evolved further. A lot further. It's like comparing day and night. But that's not all too related to what I plan for us to do. What I intend to do is pull a 'Meiji Restoration' and overthrow the council. Although I guess we don't have an emperor to restore, huh… That's kinda the wrong comparison when you think about it… I guess the closest would be… the French Revolution? Nope, definitely not! Too much beheading! Hm-m-m… Chinese Revolution? No, certainly not, they had a child emperor at the time. American Civil War? No, not even close. The NSDAP taking power from the German Republic? Nope, and I absolutely don't want to look like Hitler! Oh, I know! The Russian Revolution! Wasn't there a period when the Bolsheviks weren't in power? Like a year or so? Hm, nah, it was a republic by that point, not monarchy during regency, and I think they had a civil war after that… Damn! There has to be some historical precedent…"

"Ya had that many revolts, coups and revolutions? Ya Beyonders sure are a contentious people, Natsuki-kun."

"You just made an enemy for life!"

"Huh?"

"You won't get that reference. I'm just joking. Ahem. How much political power did the old Royal Family have?"

"Not much. The Council held most of the political power. Fourier told me so."

"Hm, were the kings bound by the laws of Lugunica?"

"Not really. Although they were kept in line. Fourier's father, Randohal, tried to contest their power, but…"

"Failed. That much is obvious when ya look at da state of affairs at da start of Royal Selection."

"Hm-m-m, since there's no shogun, maybe Lugunica is like the English Monarchy? Their monarchy is kinda 'Council of Elders'-like… Wait, no parliament, right… right…

A room went silent for a while as everyone stared at Subaru expectantly. Subaru, in the meantime, appeared lost in thought. Emilia looked at him attentively, waiting for that "big spark" in his eyes that often appeared when he had something figured out. That "spark", that contagious excitement… they were so adorable…

"No! Stop thinking about how cute he is, you airhead!"

"Huh, now that I think about it, it's kinda a unique case. Usually, those kinds of transformations are violent in nature and usually occur after some bloody wars, famines, and extreme discontent… Okay, maybe the Meiji example actually works in our situation, given it wasn't all too bloody… But still, I've heard that the blockade was rather costly for Japan, and…"

"I think you are getting sidetracked again, Natsuki-kun."

"Right, right… I'm just thinking. Well, the prerequisite for the Meiji taking power was the weakening of the Tokugawa Shogunate by the Western Powers and the economic crisis that immediately followed it, so we might need some sort of military failure to accelerate the discontent…"

"Wouldn't the Siege of Priestella fit that description?"

"Well, for better or worse, we've already dealt with most of the Witch Cult."

"Not all of them…" "Pandora…"

Mentioning of the incomplete defeat of the Witch Cult awakened an old grudge in Emilia's memory. The platinum-haired murderer was still at large, and that made her re-e-eally angry.

"Yes, Emilia-tan. Not all of them, unfortunately. And the city is still in ruins, so it was, at best, a Pyrrhic victory. I guess it will have to do, considering the economic impact of the siege will probably be rather severe…

"Alright, now let's think about the power acquisition. H-m-m, I guess the outcome we want is to give the Candidates more bargaining power, but not any one of you in particular. The main questions are 'how we acquire that power' and 'how we distribute it'."

"Ehm, why do you want to increase our influence? That's a good thing for us, but still, why, Subaru-sama? Don't we run the campaign to promote you to the role of the leader in hopes that you will satisfy all our interests?"

"Well, the backbone of my program is to transform the Royal Camps into political parties with various agendas, which I will try to balance. But if those parties don't have any legislative or executive power, what is exactly the point of making these?"

"Makes sense. So, what do ya want us to do?"

"I think I have an idea that might work. The whole 'Meiji Restoration' thing made me think. Lugunica is currently in a state of crisis, kinda like Japan back then. The economy is shit, the army is pretty much useless, ordinary people are suffering, and vagrants, witchbeasts, and cultists are everywhere. It sucks!"

"Duh. So?"

"But things are going reasonably well in the Camps. Both Astrea's and Barielle's realms are improving on an unprecedented scale. Roswaal's and Karsten's estates have always been doing great. All the while you, Anastasia, have stabilized the local trade a bit by using the assets of your trading company. So why won't you all magnanimously help the poor Lugunica? You see, if we follow my plan… "

-----

Emilia was stumped. Initially, she understood what Subaru was talking about. After all, they were talking about it earlier today. Corrupt "samurai", evil "shogun", foreign invaders, and surrounded by them on all sides was a great mind, an emperor. The story was simple for Emilia to understand, both because it was kind of similar to the situation they had at hand and because it sounded like a fairytale. A tale of perseverance and endurance. Very similar to the tales Mother Fortuna or Puck had told her.

But then, gradually, the coherent sentences and ideas just became a mash of words. She wasn't even sure why that happened. Or maybe he did. Maybe it was because his explanation was long, structurally messy, filled with words Emilia couldn't understand, and was, overall, re-e-eally confusing. Or maybe it was because she stopped listening halfway through it and began ogling Subaru from the side. Maybe it was because she started thinking of him being half-naked once again and showing off those firm muscles of his. Maybe it was because she began drawing an image of the two of them being married and having kids, just like that nightmare of hers seemed to start on. Maybe… Or maybe she was just stupid. Yeah, maybe she was. After all, the other Candidates didn't look as stumped as Emilia was.

It was rather discouraging, not being shrewd enough. A big part of her just wanted to accept the plan and move forward with it, even though she didn't understand it, like usual. But then she remembered the words that Beatrice told her: "Listen to every word he says and try to understand…". The question was, "How to do that?" Asking Subaru, especially in public, wasn't an option, as he was incredibly busy right now. Beatrice… hm-m-m… that could work, but she was so indebted to the spirit at this point that even a year of serving her tea and pastries to her personally wouldn't be enough. Echidna… no way! She's a meanie! Satella… Emilia had no way to address her now that she was excluded from the Astral Walk. People from other camps… no, she'd be a laughingstock. Roswaal! Yes, that could work!

She pulled away from her knight subtly, approached the Court Magician, and whispered:

"Ehm, Roswaal?"

"Yes, Lady Emilia?"

"May I borrow you for a minute or so?"

"Hm, of course. I got the gist of Subaru's stratagem already. The only thing that is left are the logistics."

She smiled. The fact that he understood was good. That meant Roswaal could explain it to her. She found it a bit odd that his voice was so normal now, without the familiar stretching of words. Maybe it was because he took Subaru's plans so seriously?

The two quickly left the room without disrupting the procedure.

"So, Emilia-sama?"

"M-m-m… It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but I don't understand the thing of what Subaru has been saying so far."

"A-a-ah, I see. Don't be discouraged. Financial investment, the crown's budgets, and noble factions are rather complicated subjects to understand. After all, you only have a grasp of the history of Lugunica, court manners, and local statecraft so far. Let me explain it more clearly to you, Lady Emilia..."

-----

Plan B relied on taking advantage of Lugunica's poor economic situation. As Subaru said, while the estates of each Royal Candidate (for Priscilla and Crusch it was their personal estates, for Emilia – Roswaal's, for Felt – Astrea's, and for Anastasia – assets of Hoshin Trading Company in Lugunica) saw a significant increase in quality of life over the year, the crownlands did not. If anything, the absence of a proper leader led to an increase of corruption, and as a result, the royal treasury was nearly empty.

That's where they will come into play. According to Subaru's design, individual deals will be made with the Council, where each of the Candidates invests in the crownlands, bringing prosperity to the royal domain. Previously, similar investments weren't an option due to the risk of losing them in the event of defeat in the Royal Selection. Right now, however, it is a sound solution, since everyone expects their interests to be accounted for in the future thanks to the Sage's wise leadership. And the price the crown had to pay for these investments was simple – legislative power. And if some of those investments were directed to a Council member's personal estate,… well, let's just say that this Council member would owe them a great favor.

Or, at least, that's how Roswaal explained Subaru's second plan to Emilia.

Essentially, Subaru wanted to propose a salvation to the Council of Elders, giving them money in exchange for more power for the Camps. "A deal with the Devil", Subaru called it.

There was also a plan C – a popular revolt, or "Revolution". While most of them would talk with the Elders, a small group would scatter across the Capital and begin to incite people against the Council. The timing was also important, as of now, the city didn't have enough knights loyal to the Council to stop the rally. So, if the Elders completely refuse to parley, they will execute an aggressive takeover, and if they don't refuse but continue to ignore Subaru's suggestions, the people outside the palace could be used as a way to pressure them. Of course, regardless of the outcome, the crowd would not be used to fight, rather, they were a show of Subaru's influence in an attempt to intimidate the Elders. And if the crowd would not be needed at all, then it will still be useful to gather people to announce the new changes.

All in all, these were very smart plans. Subaru was re-e-eally smart, he always had very intelligent ideas. Well, Emilia thought so, but, of course, she was a bit biased in regard to her knight. Just a tiny-tiny bit biased. Yep. Okay, maybe she was very biased, but that still didn't mean he wasn't incredibly smart!

-----

Eventually, Emilia and her sponsor returned to the meeting.

"And that's it, I think. We have a decent plan that should work. Should. Unless something catastrophic happens."

"That's a flag, Master."

"It is indeed a flag, I suppose."

"Ah, shit! Well, crap, I guess I just can't have nice things, huh? Alright, given my luck, something will definitely happen now, so I want extra precautions. Just in case the Cult decides to attack the Capital, or if the Black Serpent decides to have another big snack, or someone from you people is suddenly revealed to be the big bad that will end the world if I don't stop it. Okay, maybe that one is a bit too much on the nose.

"Right, I'm getting sidetracked again. I want everyone with us at the parley."

"Everyone? Of course, everyone here would come to the meeting, besides the few diverted to Plan C and…"

"No, by everyone, I mean, EVERYONE! ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE! AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE."

"Sir Subaru, why are you shou-"

Suddenly, about three dozen of portals opened all over the room.

"Thanks, dear."

It took a while for Emilia and everyone else to understand what was going on. But then she eventually got it:

"Oh, that's Satella's doing!"

"Wait, how? Is that one of your abilities, Sir Subaru?"

"No, Captain Marcos, technically that's not me. Though I am the main cause. But that's my big secret."

"A secret?"

"A secret."

"Urgh, so much secrecy about your person. Honestly, this makes me uneasy."

"It should, commoner."

The fact that it was Priscilla who told so was saying something. Marcos Drilldark, who was unaware of the Satella's presence and, for that reason, didn't know that the most horrifying person in the world (and Emilia's romantic rival) was the one who did that. Everyone else (including Emilia herself), of course, did. After all, Satella had already done something like that before. Moreover, Emilia very vividly remembered S.M.B. and it's aftermath.

-----

Everyone was here. And by "everyone", Subaru clearly didn't mean just the partygoers from Priestella. No, he meant everyone as in:

"Subaru-kun!" "Barusu."

Oni maids,…

"Natsuki-san, what's going on?" "Captain! How are ya doin'?"

… the two of his best friends, also known as the "Three Idiots" crew,…

"Subaru-sama." "Subaru... I mean, Subaru-sama!" "Onii-san." "Compression of Space. Remarkable. Familiar. Unknown Source. Fascinating. Greetings." "Natsuki Su-… Emily!" "Young Su." "…" "…"

… Frederica, Petra, Meili, Clind, Annerose, the currently active elder Ryuzu (Delma, from the looks of things), and even every Pico Ryuzu,...

"Emilia-sama. Subaru-sama." "Emilia-sama. Subaru-sama." "Emilia-sama. Subaru-sama." "Emilia-sama. Subaru-sama."...

Sylphy Elmart (formerly No. 184) at the head of the cohort of Regulus' former wives.

"Uau!" "Master Flugel."

… the former Archbishops of Gluttony and Sloth,…

"And this chapter of the 'Drunken Sage Saga' continues on with a surprising teleportation! Now, this amazing bard will describe those wondrous events not just from the recount of various compatriots of the Hero, but from her own perspective as well! Let see what the Great Sage, the Hero of Priestella, the Slayer of the Witchbeasts, the Bane of the Cult, the Wild Drunkard, the Lolimancer, Natsuki Subaru, has in store for us toda-a-ay!" "Sh-h-h, my muse. They seem to be preparing for something."

… Liliana and Kiritaka,...

"Baru!" "Subarun." "S-Subaru." "What do you need me for, ha-a-a..." "Yeah, what do you need us for, you baka!"

… the Witches of Sin (the five who were not present before),…

"Caw!"

… and, of course, "the most loyal companion", "the coolest ground dragon there is", and "the best girl" (all of which were Subaru's descriptions of her), Patrasche.

-----

Every member of that wild party that started it all and everyone who was associated with Emilia Camp were here. Just their Camp alone was enough to fill the entirety of this meeting room, if you add the other Camps, well… To say it simply, it was crowded. Re-e-eally crowded. Honestly, that amount of people felt somewhat unnecessary.

Emilia still wondered how exactly Satella managed to place so many portals accurately and how much mana something like this cost her. In her previous experience, only Beatrice had the ability to teleport people, and the spirit could only do so with small groups over short distances. Come to think of it, it probably had a lot to do with past-Subaru developing Yin Magic with Satella, just as present-Subaru helped her. But, honestly, looking at the things the so-called Witch could do made Emilia feel re-e-eally self-conscious.

"She's so cool and helpful… And all I can do is just make chunks of ice and freeze things. So unfair…"

Ugly thoughts began to invade her mind.

"Urgh, why is she so amazing, and I'm not!"

The newly arrived were quickly brought up to speed on both the current situation and what the Sage needs them here for. No one seemed to have any questions or had any objections to Subaru's plans, even those unaware of events in Priestella or the Pleiades Watchtower until this very moment. The majority of the Sage's associates were assigned to join the parley, and only a small part (mostly non-combatants) was designated to agitate for Plan C. Still, everyone, including Emilia, seemed to be slightly on edge. Perhaps it was due to the hastily made plans, or maybe they were afraid of this "flag". Nonetheless, they set off.

-----

The stroll to the Palace was a leisurely one. No carriages, everyone but Subaru (who mounted Patrasche) was on foot. That was intentional – both a message against the excesses of the opposing nobility and to highlight himself over everyone else present (and because he wanted to ride Patrasche again, he also admitted that).

There were no incidents or obstacles along the way. No assassins, no insults about her half-elven looks, no dirt thrown at her. There were some quiet murmurs, yet even they weren't directed at her. It was kind of nice, actually. Although Captain Marcos still organized an escort of knights for additional safety, not that it was needed. Nonetheless, this congregation certainly drew attention. Especially Emilia herself, her beloved knight, and his blonde spirit. All three (four if you include the ground dragon) were at the front of this congregation. They were flanked by the Stick Swinger, who blew kisses to every woman they passed; Garfiel, who tried to imitate the former; Otto, who tried to make himself look as small as possible; Shaula, who, according to Subaru's description, was doing so-called "finger guns" and "JoJo walks",… And… everyone else. It would take Emilia too long to observe them all and describe everyone present and what they were doing in this improvised parade. So instead of continuing to do so, she just kept going forward, occasionally sneaking peeks at her knight.

About half an hour later, they passed the outside gate, signaling inside about their arrival and about their desire for an imminent second parley.

-----

Just as they reached the lobby just before the throne room, someone else joined them.

"Good morning, Sir Natsuki, and well… everyone else."

To be fair, there were a lot of noteworthy people beside him, including Emilia herself.

"Good morning. Haven't seen you in a while, Mr. Russel."

"Oh, just Russell. No need for 'mister'."

"Subaru, do you know this… person?"

Emilia did not. Unlike her, her knight seemed to be acquainted with the person in question. Enough to even shake his hand.

"Oh, we just cooperated a bit during the whole White Whale expedition. Honestly, I don't know what you saw in me at that point."

"I made a small gamble, you know. Your actions impressed me a lot back then, in a positive way. What an astounding show of loyalty… unrequited at the time, but still," this offhand comment made Emilia flinch, "unlike now, it would seem," she flinched again, but this time for a different reason, "and the metia you so generously gave me in return for my humble assistance was most fascinating."

"Speaking of which, does that thing still work?"

"It stopped functioning after a few days, unfortunately, but we still made great discoveries while studying its materials."

"You didn't shatter it to pieces, I hope?"

"No, just passive observation and mana probing."

"Okay, maybe once I figure out how to introduce the electricity and charge it, I might be able to buy it back from you!"

"It would be a shame to part with it, but if you can revitalize it, all the better. Researchers were still incredibly fascinated by its structure. Very sturdy for something so small and seemingly fragile."

"Oh, right! These old flip phones are nearly indestructible! Not as indestructible as old Nokia phones, but second only to them. I'm pretty sure those things can withstand a strike from Reid."

"Huh?"

"Not you, Reid. I mean, Reid the Sword."

"Ah! That stick? I mean, sure, that stupid thing is like a brittle toothpick."

Emilia could vaguely hear Julius cough somewhere in the background, choking on something.

"Ehm…"

"Don't pay attention to them, Mr. Russell, just some banter between da old friends. Those three are a weird bunch. After travelin' to Augria with them, I can attest to that."

She pointed at the Great Sage, the Stick Swinger, and the Sage's Apprentice.

"I'd have to agree with that, too, Lady Anastasia."

Many others, along with Julius, who stopped coughing, nodded in agreement with the Merchant Princess's words. Emilia wanted to nod too but decided against it so as not to upset her knight.

"Ah, I assume you are the First Sword Saint that I heard so much about today."

"Aye. Tho that title is really fuckin' stupid. Hate it. Dragonslayah is way better."

"Same with mine. The Great Sage… really? Why not something cooler?"

"I mean, our whole crew was kind of unlucky with those. I'm Shaula, by the way, Master's Wonderful Apprentice."

"The Great Sage Sha-…?"

"Not Sage. Just Apprentice."

"Very well, Lady Shaula. A pleasure to meet you. As well as each and every one of you. Unfortunately, I doubt we have time to exchange names right now."

He extended his palm, pointing at everyone else.

"True. It would take an hour just to mention them all. I assume you are joining the meeting?"

"I am."

"If it's not rude to ask, which side are you on?"

"Side?"

"Well, there's our side, which is for the accelerated reform program; the side of Miklotov, who tries to balance progress with the Council's interests; and… there's Bordeaux."

"Oh, you mean that. I am on the side of Lugunica."

"Lugunica?"

"I see issues in all three approaches. Your approach is unreliable and unpredictable. We have no idea what kind of results we would get from such swift changers."

"Fair enough. I'd argue it's necessary, but I see you point."

"The approach of Bordeaux is shortsighted. He wants Lugunica to continue stagnating. And that is bad for everyone, not just the Demi-humans he despises."

"True."

"And the approach of Miklotov is needlessly wasteful. Whichever of the two outcomes wins out, it would still be partially stifled by his efforts. That is why I am on neither side."

"Hm-m-m, clever. Well, I hope my next plan would help to sway you."

"For the sake of Lugunica, I hope so as well."

"Well, after you, Mister Russell. Let the games begin. Again."

"Thank you. Indeed, let the games begin."

"Yes. I hope Subaru will manage to succeed the second time."

The large doors separating them from the main hall finally opened.

Chapter Text

"I love you…"

He didn't respond, but his actions spoke for themselves. Instead of saying "I love you" back, his mouth was currently on her neck, leaving a trail of saliva there. With each second of his assault, she mellowed more and more as his hands wandered around her body: first, he brushed her ears, then caressed her cheeks, then tickled her neck, then touched her shoulders, then held her palms, and, finally, right now his hands are busy exploring her waist. She knew that soon enough he will act even more bolder and move on to her breasts, then her thighs, then her butt, and then even further…

"Ah, damn it… Right when I was getting into it…"

Suddenly, her dream vanished. He left without a word.

"Od damn! Even while being asleep, he keeps teasing me… Damn playboy…"

Over the past year, his soul had kept coming back here, either during his dreams or when he inevitably met his end. But these two nights were very different – with each collected Witch Factor, his soul felt fuller and fuller, and with the amplified connection between the two, his actions were getting more and more… scandalous. Of course, Satella wasn't against this (duh!), the issue was that he always left so soon!

"I guess he's waking up. Urgh, stupid… Can't you nap for a few more minutes!?"

Of course, no one had answered this frustrated plea.

After a long sigh, full of disappointment and yearning, she began constructing the spell matrix, preparing to return to the Prime Layer. With his previous actions still deeply ingrained in her mind, she released the spell and began mentally counting the number of jumps so as to avoid overshooting and accidentally breaking into Dona's realm again (that was her most common mistake when she first learned this technique).

"Alright, 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8… and 9. Done."

-----

"Hello…"

Still flustered from the recent… experience, Satella arrived in his bedroom.

"Hey, Tella!"

"Good morning, I suppose."

"Sleep well?"

"Mhm, I'm good."

"Betty's Subaru was calm today. No need to worry."

The spirit was referring to the event of the night before, in the Tower, when Satella had to visit him because of his nightmares. Consequently, it was that visit that caused him to reenter the Shadow Garden in his dreams on both this and the previous night.

"Good, good. I'm glad you okay."

"Don't worry, Tella-tan, my mental stats are genuinely quite great! Who would've thought that getting piss-ass drunk would be so beneficial for me? Well, mostly beneficial. Hangovers suck, though. Urgh! Speaking of… I need one of these Anastasia's remedies."

"Sigh, let Betty help, I suppose."

"I guess the healing magic could help, too. Thanks, Beako. But don't burn all of your mana on it, please."

"If Betty's foolish contractor wishes so. But I won't be able to cure all of it in that case, in fact. There."

"Ha-a-a… Better."

"You still need to take a cold shower or a bath, I suppose. That should help with that vulgar smell of yours, too."

"Beako, I can't do anything about the Authority smell, I thought you know this!"

"Betty probably meant the smell from your body... But I don't think it's bad, I actually like it a lot…"

Taking this opportunity to get a good sniff of him, Satella began circling around him, inhaling his pungent aroma of sweat and alcohol fumes.

"Stop, stop, stop! Alright, I get it, you two! I'll bathe."

"Do you need…" "...help?"

She had already drawn a mental image of the two of them inside a bath together. And everything that said action would lead them towards.

"NO!"

"But I have two thousand hands that could help…"

And an image of using her shadowy appendages to… clean him. Yep, right, definitely clean him, she meant nothing lewd! Definitely!

"NO!"

"But you promised you'd let me touch you…"

To scrub his back! Not to… Ah, damn it! Now she was thinking about something even more lewd! Though she wasn't sure he'd be into it.

"NO! And the 'grope-me' ticket is only for touching me through clothing, not for molesting me in the bath!"

"Gr-r-r…"

He was so unfair!

"I swear, Tella. What the hell is wrong with you lately?"

"I… I... I love you..."

Satella couldn't explain that it was he that what was wrong with her. That he pretty much had her wrapped around his finger just weeks after they first met during their first adventure. That after four hundred years of lonely abstinence and a year of satisfying her needs by secretly watching him from the side, the last two days were like being run over by a wild ground dragon. That after being that close to him any attempts to separate from him ended with her sub-persona (Witch) so angry that it felt like her head was torn apart. That her internal womanly alarm clock was ringing so loudly that almost all of her thoughts at any point in time involved him. That she was still very randy from his actions in their shared dream and that she desperately wanted to make them a reality. That he meant everything to her. That she loved him dearly, eternally, everlastingly, more than anything, and more than anyone else could. That she loved him so much, so much... Forever and ever. That she wanted to be together with him. Forever and ever. That she wanted to envelop him in her own shadows. Forever and ever. That she wanted to be one whole, that she wanted to consume him, that she wanted to meld together into a singular being. Forever and ever. That she wouldn't stop, no matter what she had to do or whom she had to slay for him to love her back. Forever and ever. Even if she had to destroy everyone else he loved. Forever and ever. That she loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him! Loved him…!

-----

"But…"

"No buts, Tella-tan. No matter what happens, no matter what you think about yourself. I. LOVE. YOU. I love you! Forever and ever!"

"Forever and ever…"

-----

Eventually, she snapped out of it. Well, not exactly on her own. No, it was a hand on her cheek, it was his touch that finally awakened her.

"Nope, not turning into Envy-tan on my watch, Tella!"

The cloud of shadows that had suddenly emerged around her quickly disappeared. It was fine. He was fine, his spirit was fine, the mansion was fine – everything was fine. But she came so close to...

"Sorry…"

"Ah, crap. Don't cry, Tella. Not your fault."

Liar. It was her fault. Always her fault.

"Sniff."

"There, there."

"Sniff-sniff."

This was too close. She had almost completely lost herself there, almost devoured him and everyone inside the mansion, again. All because she had grown complacent enough to think that his presence alone was enough to keep the Witch at bay.

"Are you okay?"

His hand gently caressed her cheek. The warmth from his palm slowly spread across her face. It's okay, she'll be okay.

"Mhm…"

"Good."

"I love you."

"Yes, I know."

"…"

"Urgh, I swear, the only absolute worst thing about Betty's Subaru is his choice of love interests, I suppose!"

"He-he, I'd say I have plenty of negative traits besides that one. Are you okay, Beako?"

"Betty is fine. Since everyone else is asleep right now, another miasma expulsion wouldn't harm anyone, I suppose. At worst, it might invoke a nightmare or two."

"Oh… Sorry, Betty."

Satella quickly realized that her losing control here had also unleashed some of her presence again, causing an aura of terror around her. At least Beatrice was probably right in her assessment, and she was likely the only one affected by it.

"Don't be. No harm done, in fact."

"Okay, since everyone is fine now, I'm going to bathe. Beako, I'm leaving Tella-tan in your firm, capable hands. If she gets randy again, just scream."

"Can I…"

"Nope, no joining, Tella-tan," she pouted, "and I don't want you to throw another temper tantrum about it again."

"Okay…"

"Will be back in half an hour. Keep an eye on her, Beako."

"But of course."

With a final, affectionate brush of her cheek, he made her smile again and then quickly left.

-----

It took her exactly twenty heartbeats to feel lonely again. And that (and a second voice inside her head) motivated her to act. Her lover was the type of person to spit on the rules, traditions, or promises if they got in his way. It was something that over time, rubbed off on her. In that way, she'd gladly break promises if they would get in between them. Therefore, she can safely ignore… Wait, hold on… He made her promise to not interrupt his bathing and to control her alter ego, but he didn't ask her not to watch! Loophole! That way she didn't even have to break any obligations to him!

So, she closed her eyes and mentally concentrated on the link between them.

"He's moving away. One room away. Two rooms away. Three. Okay, it's time."

"You won't stay here, I suppose?"

"No."

"Go ahead."

"You won't stop me?"

"How do you think Betty can stop you, in fact? Don't worry, Betty won't tell on you."

"Thanks. Astral Walk."

"Urgh, truly, his choice of partners is the absolute worst, in fact!"

-----

One of the benefits of the Astral Walk is that you can easily pass through objects, including walls. Satella used this property to hide in the bathroom walls, leaving only a tiny part of her outside, just enough to peek.

"Tella, I can feel you! Pervert!"

"Ah! Crap, I didn't retune it!"

"Get out!"

"But…"

"Out!"

"… I've already seen pretty much every part of you!"

And up close at that, very up close.

"OUT!"

With his final word, the world shook, the Astral Walk spell matrix cracked, and she was violently expelled from the bathroom wall and sent flying into the neighboring lavatory. Thank the Od Lagna, the spell matrix stabilized itself, and she remained intangible. Otherwise, she would have been covered in excrement. Additionally, the spell also prevented the outside smell from coming inside too, which was very fortunate for her as well. Nonetheless, Satella left the toilet rather quickly.

Disappointed that her devious plan had failed, she stood outside the bathroom. Now that he was aware of her, any other plan to spy on him probably wouldn't work.

"Sigh, I guess I have to wait for him outside."

Eventually, she couldn't help herself, closed her eyes, and concentrated on their link again, hoping to see the world through his eyes. Her perspective of his gorgeous body would be limited, but at least she'd see… something. But she was disappointed yet again – for whatever reason, he was bathing with his eyes closed.

"Na-ah, Tella. Not gonna work."

She could vaguely hear his muffled shout from the inside.

"How did he…? Oh…"

She noticed two shiny bulbs of light circling around her head. These must be the two spirits that had begun following her lover around. They must be the reason she had been discovered twice thus far.

"Urgh, stupid brats… You damn snitches!"

In this moment, she found herself relating to the blonde spirit-librarian. Lacking the ability to talk, the two started to lightly shimmer in response, clearly mocking her. At first, she wanted to lash out at them, but due to the concerns about her beloved behind the door, who would undoubtedly be angry if they disappeared, she decided to swallow her pride and just genuinely stop trying to peek at him.

-----

"…uel Angel's Thesis from the start; Brought to life, out window now it's taking flight; Scorching patho-…"

"Wah!"

"Tella, don't just stand against the door!"

He caught her just before she collapsed when the door opened inward.

"I was guarding you… Whoa..."

In the end, her persistent attempts to peek didn't matter at all. Why? Because now she received an almost equally great gift from him. Almost. Before her stood the icon of sex appeal: a tall, muscular, handsome – no, gorgeous – no, ravishing young man. His body glistened, still wet from the bath, and his hair hung down instead of his usual hairdo that he borrowed from his father. More importantly, only a loose towel covered his modesty.

Suffice to say, her reaction to this was immediate (in the form of saliva dripping down her mouth). In fact, this was so arousing that she just barely managed to prevent herself from tearing that accursed towel apart.

"Can I touch…"

"Te-e-ella. What did I tell you about the 'grope-me' ticket?"

"Gr-r-r. So unfair."

"I mean, at least I don't stop you from ogling. Though, I don't think I can even prevent you from doing that."

"Sigh. Good things come in small packages..."

"I'm not..."

"Oh, yeah, that… I didn't think that one through. I like your size, dear. It's perfect: both length and girth."

"Tella… are you talking about my body structure?"

"…"

"Right?"

"*smirk*"

"Tella!"

"Tee-hee!"

"I swear, I'm starting to think Echidna made this Seal thing just to contain your horniness!"

If that was her goal, it clearly had the opposite effect.

"Anyway, you should really hide yourself, darling."

"Why?"

"There are a couple of people here who don't know our deal yet. They might panic."

"Oh, you mean that knight?"

"Yeah, Knight Captain Marcos. And I also have seen a couple of his knights outside. Probably his doing too."

"Okay. Astral Walk."

She vanished, leaving only a vague shadow in her place. This time, Satella tuned the spell just so that he could still see and hear her clearly, but no one else could.

"So-o-o… Where are we going?"

"Hm-m-m. Beako probably wants to take a bath too. Actually, what about you? Would you like to take a bath? Everyone else is still asleep anyway."

"Not without you with me. *wink* I think your back needs a bit more scrubbing. I know someone who might help..."

During the time they were together four hundred years ago, he made her develop a habit: over the span of two months he persistently interrupted her time bathing on the pretense of helping her scrub her back. It was rather frustrating, especially since, of course, he didn't end it just on scrubbing. So she had to wash up twice each time (for reasons that don't need to be explained). Eventually, though, he simply conditioned her to these dual-bathing sessions to the point that she grew averse to bathing without him.

"No-o-ope. No way, Tella. You can't seduce me like that!"

What made it now even more frustrating was that their roles had been reversed.

She pouted. Unfortunately, even that didn't make him reconsider.

"Sigh, then I skip it today."

"Really? How often do you bathe?"

No answer.

"Te-e-ella. When was the last time you bathed?"

No answer still.

"Te-e-e-e-e-ella! Of course, your presence makes me reek! You haven't showered since the Great Calamity, have you?!"

Ironically, his assessment was actually rather accurate. Of course the unique nature of her Authority prevented her from things like sweating, needing water or nutrition, or having to relieve herself, but…

"You are an even bigger shut-in neet than I am!"

She lowered her eyes in shame.

"Honestly, what's with all the people around me shutting themselves in? Emilia-tan and her forest, you and your shadow dimension, Beako and her library, Garfiel and the Sanctuary, Echidna and that castle… Hm-m-m-m-m, and the Tower people too, like Shaula and Volc… Reid doesn't count, he was dead… Still, so many neets! What the hell!"

"Betty had heard her name. What are you on about, Subaru?"

While the two were chatting, someone else joined the conversation.

"Oh, I was just thinking about how many people around me are shut-ins like you, Beako. Surprisingly many."

"Betty, isn't a shut-in, in fact!"

"Yes, you are. Both of you are. You both spent four hundred years waiting for that special someone to free you."

"You are special, though, dear. So… worth it?"

"Indeed, quite special, I suppose. Definitely worth it."

Just a moment ago, Satella tuned the spell matrix of the Astral Walk yet again just so that Beatrice could hear her.

"Argh! Not this again!"

The compliments seemed to have a profound effect on the Sage. It was truly his only genuine weakness.

"I know, right? Like a knight in shining armor."

"Mhm, Betty's Subaru is awesome like that, in fact."

"A-a-ah! No! Not the compliment counterattack! Even my own words are turned against me! How cruel!"

He fell to his knees dramatically and tore at his hair with his hands. Disappointingly, the towel was somehow still firmly on his hips despite all his sudden movements.

"Betty's Subaru is overdoing it again, I suppose. You are very cringe, in fact."

"Ah!"

He flinched as if he had been struck again.

"No, I like it. It's cute and charming."

And then he flinched again.

"Sigh, you, Satella, are hopeless, in fact. Anyway, out of the way, it's Betty's time to clean herself!"

She quickly moved past them. Still a bit flushed from their compliments the Sage rose from his knees.

"All right, I guess it's time for us to go before you bury me further with your compliments."

"Where to, dear?"

"Hm-m-m, let's just go back, change, and wait for the others in the lobby, Tella-tan."

-----

"By the way, you don't have to talk out loud to reach me. The link works both ways."

"Wait, really?"

"I mean it's a lot harder to look through your eyes or read your emotions, but telepathic communication is easy."

"Oh, wait, I think I've already done something similar. With Julius. Is it like Nect?"

"Kinda, but not really. The idea is similar, the execution is different. Nect is more of a later modification of the original technique that the two of us developed. To say it simply, Nect is a 'baby' magic developed later, the Mindspace is the real thing."

"The Mindspace?"

"You named it."

"Okay, then. Teach me the secrets of this Mindspace, oh, Tella-sensei!"

"Te-he. Sensei… now there's a fond memory. So, first, close your eyes. You can use my gate to cast the spell."

"Cor Leonis. Ready, Tella."

"Gather mana. About the amount you need for Shamak."

"There."

"Good. Now, let your thoughts exit your head and spread around you."

"I think I got it."

"There. You reached your Mindspace. Here is where all of your past and current experiences are collected. You can do many things inside here. That's good enough already, but it's kind of useless on its own, so let's go further. You can open your eyes now, but don't disconnect your mind from what you just experienced. Now search for me mentally. Try to reach out to me. It should be a lot easier thanks to our connection."

"Aha…"

"Wonderful! And then choose the thing that you want inside my own Mindspace. You can look through senses, memories, instincts, emotions, and other stuff like that, but most of that is mentally taxing and consumes a lot of mana. Oh, and before you ask, you can only connect, not change anything here. The latter is only possible via Authority. So, for now, simple things: try to connect to my surface thoughts with your own surface thoughts."

"There. 'Damn, he looks so cute when he's so concentrated like that…' Really, Tella?"

"Wah, sorry! My thoughts are a mess!"

"And now it's an image of me with my bits out. Sigh. I don't know what I was really expecting."

"Ah! No-no-no-no-no!"

"And now it's the two of us carrying what look like two newborn babies, probably ours. Okay, I give you that one, Tella, they look cute."

"A-a-a-a-a-a-h!"

That was the greatest mistake of her life. Okay, the second greatest if you count the Witch Incident.

-----

"Look out!"

"A-a-a-h!"

They suddenly bumped into someone else on their way back.

"Emilia-tan! Where are you running to?"

"Oh, Subaru. You're here! I thought I was stuck in an odd dream. Wait, are you real? Or are you also a part of my dream?"

Her counterpart looked spooked. Just as if she had just seen a nightmare. The fact that she mentioned a dream all but confirmed it. Maybe Betty wasn't the only one affected by her miasma.

"Yeah, that's a good point, Tella-tan. Maybe it wasn't as harmless of the Envy tantrum as we thought, and it affected others too.

"Hm, Emilia clearly needs some comforting… Hold on, I have a fun idea."

"I would like to be a part of your dream, preferably a happy one, or maybe even a more spicy one eventually… But that's neither here nor there. Well, I can pinch you to wake you up, but you would probably won't like that. So, let's figure it out this way: close your eyes for a moment, imagine me gone, wait for the five seconds, and then open your eyes…"

-----

As the two continued talking, Satella kept silent, still keeping an eye on the two. Their banter was rather cute, and she couldn't help but mentally project herself onto the other half-elf (the fact that they were identical was also a factor in it). It brought back warm memories of their first adventure: like when he felt off a cliff on a dare with Reid, which led to the creation of Murak; or when they jumped from Volc's back with one of his inventions that he called a parachute; or when they discovered a dimensional layer full of wild spirits, which led him to grab home a few, including the one that used to live in the Green Room; or when they accidentally ran over a random dude with a carriage, who then turned out to be a big druglord, and began a manhunt against them, and then they run him over again, but this time intentionally; or when they started a slave rebellion in what is now called the Kararagi City-States; or when the two of them got so drunk they did what in hindsight they really should've not… There were a lot of sweet moments like these in her memories, moments that were sadly lost to him.

"Sounds interesting, honestly. I remember a couple of tales from what Reid told me yesterday, but I want to hear your perspective too. You know, usually it's the other way around – I remember, others don't."

"Okay, maybe after you change?"

"Sure."

-----

"...Gr-r-r. Dunderhead."

"You are groping me again, Emilia-tan."

"Just… Urgh… I…"

"Sorry, Emilia-tan, but the 'grope-me' ticket is Tella's prize. Also, that's not the first time you've been handsy either. Just the last night…"

Oh, she remembered that scene very well. In fact, that's something Satella wanted to do again, but this time without anyone else and without his clothes getting in the way.

"Tella-tan!"

"Sorry!"

Her inner thoughts leaked to him again.

"I… I don't remember the last night. Were we doing something nau-... O-o-o-o-ow, my head hurts so much!"

"Oh, that looks bad. Well, it makes sense, you were totally hammered yesterday! Of course you would have a drunken amnesia and a nasty hangover. Surprisingly enough, I don't. Amnesia, I mean, a slight hangover is there, but the bath fixed most of it. Maybe it's because I didn't have any special Sage whiskey, just some cheap Capital swill?"

"Note to self: prevent Emilia-tan from drinking again. She's an adorable drunkard, but really it's for her own good."

Satella was a bit envious (hah, envious, funny, she didn't intend to make that pun) that he was hugging her counterpart. Not that she had anything against the Royal Candidate, no, it's just that her lover didn't allow her to touch his naked chest, yet Emilia was allowed to! This was clearly a case of favoritism! Not fair! That upstart was exploiting his love for attention!

"Hey, Emilia-tan is clearly too innocent to use me like that. She just looks a bit flustered from her hangover, that's all."

"Su-u-ure. I'm pretty certain that your naked chest seduced her. It did the job for me."

"There, there. Alright, no more thinking too hard for a bit, Emilia-tan. Just relax. Better?"

"Mhm."

"Anyway, I think you need to take a bath too. Not just to ease the hangover, but also… well… how should I say it… you look filthy and smell… worse than usual."

"You both smell. Every time Envy comes out, it's like just your mere presence suffocates me."

"I don't smell! It's miasma!"

"How do you know? Maybe it's miasma AND sweat."

"Urgh!"

"Huh?"

"Yeah. I don't really mind, but I think E.M.M. should stand for 'Emilia-tan Maji Megami', not the 'Emilia-tan Maji Mess'."

"Urgh! You're right…"

"That, and your hair is a completely disheveled."

"Yeah… I'll take a bath."

"What about a threes-… I mean, a triple bath? Me, you, Emilia…"

"NO! What the hell, Tella-tan!?"

"I'm just asking…"

"Beako is currently in there, but she probably won't not mind. See you, Emilia-tan!"

"Wait, where are the baths?"

"Further down this corridor on the right. There's a sign, so you won't miss it."

"This place is re-e-eally confusing. I got lost here before bumping into you. Where are you going?"

"Well, I probably need to put on something other than this towel." "Just so you stop salivating over me, Tella." "But then I'd be in the lobby."

"Lobby?"

"A room right before the the main hall where Priscilla's 'throne' is."

"Hm, have you ever been here before, Subaru?"

"Oh, right, wasted loop."

"Not wasted, you didn't use your life in vain there, dear."

"Yes, you right, I'd figured out the Whale timing in that one. And Puck's whole thing. And how much of an asshole every Candidate that isn't Emilia is. And the fact that other-you can kill her if she wishes…"

"I don't want to hurt you. It's just… it's safer if they aren't aware…"

"Yeah, I know. Honestly, I even kinda agree."

"Uh... No, of course not. It's just good spatial awareness. Definitely."

"Okay, Subaru. I will see you in a bit."

"See you."

-----

"Alright, no peeking!"

"I won't peek!"

"I'll sic little guys on you, Tella-tan."

"No, seriously, you can have my word!"

"Promise?"

"Unlike you, I actually keep them…"

"Except the times you do not."

"The pot calling the kettle black! Mr. Promise Breaker!"

"Alright, fair. So, thousand needles?"

"Sigh, a thousand needles."

The pinkie promise (the greatest binding force from his home, which threatened a serious punishment for breaking it – the aforementioned thousand needles) was made, and her love started changing.

"Actually, what are you going to wear? The old stuff or...?"

"What do you like? I think I still like the tracksuit the most. But we're also gonna have a meeting today, so maybe something official? Honestly, I'm glad that I brought a bunch of clothes into Priestella. Don't want to wear that ballroom knight uniform, though. It's pretty but suffocating."

"I'd say the tracksuit. I like it the most."

"Tracksuit it is! Ah, the smell of nostalgia… and ashes… Still can't get the smell of the burnt Petelgeuse out of it."

"Can I turn now?"

In her defense, Satella did not peek, so no needles for her.

"Yeah."

"*whistle* Oh, damn! Who is that sexy man?"

"Me. Natsuki Subaru."

"You could at least respond to my flirting attempts!"

"Or what?"

"Or I'll become very naughty."

"How naughty are we talking about?"

"Destroy-the-world kinda naughty."

"Hm, I guess I should respond then. Astral Walk."

Before she could react, he crossed the boundary between them using their still-intact Cor Leonis link, pulled her closer, and planted a kiss on her cheek.

"Good enough of a response?"

No answer. Satella was quickly turning red. Internally, she wanted to scream (in a good way).

"Yeah…"

"That was very cheesy. Something you see in the cheapest smutty light novel."

"I liked it."

"You are hopeless."

"I am. You made me this way."

"Another cheesy line, Tella."

"Gr-r-r."

"Heh. Alright, onto the other things."

"Wai-…"

He left her space just as suddenly, returning back to the Prime Layer. To say that he had her wrapped around his finger in this moment would be an understatement. If he had asked her to jump, she would have asked how high; if he had asked her to bark, she would have howled like a she-wolf in heat; and if he had asked her to bend over, she would have… Actually, let's stop that thought before it leaks to him.

"Too late, Tella. It had already leaked."

"Damn it!"

Once again, she began regretting teaching him how to intrude on her thoughts at will.

"But seriously, Tella, you are way too frisky today. What happened?"

"You! You happened! You, you adorable dork! Ever since I barged into your party (on YOUR request, mind you!) you kept egging me on! Teasing me with that adorable smile, gorgeous eyes, cute compliments, and hot body! Listen, I'm the most sexually frustrated woman in this whole world right now! All because of you! You made me fall in love with you! You implanted into me this all-consuming desire in me! You! Not that I regret it…, but still! And with your actions, you keep dangling the proverbial carrot in front of someone who is clearly starving! Of course, I'm frisky!"

"Okay, that felt like a cry from the heart."

"It is!"

"Would me flirting with you a bit less help?"

"I dunno. It might help; it might not. It's just very frustrating, that's all I'm saying…"

"Sorry."

"No! That's not something you should feel sorry about! It's just…"

"But I am sorry. I'll try to be more considerate of your feelings in the future."

"Fine…"

It was… complicated. It wasn't a bad thing per se, just very annoying, and yet, at the same time, she enjoyed the constant romantic banter and insistent flirting from both parties. It reminded her of their hopeful past – something she had carelessly ruined.

-----

"So, by the time we arrived, you and Reid had already finished with the Emperor of Vollachia. The Stick Swinger had the monarch's daughter under his control after thoroughly… 'plowing' her. And you… Well, the scene when we arrived was rather funny. As the part of the payment for his rescue, you had emperor's crown and throne taken for an hour and had him delivering drinks to you. Oh, and the Yang Sword, of course – a symbol of the ruling family. As you can guess, that left everyone befuddled: Farsale and Alec really thought you had decided to usurp the Vollachia on a whim."

When they reached the lobby the two didn't have anything to do. So, as promised, she began reciting tales of his wild past.

"Hah! Damn that's so funny! I kinda want to pull something like that again!"

"We could… You know, just sneak out of Lugunica and come back here to the Council with a whole Vollachian army. Might spook them, though."

"Great idea! And we'll call this army The Pleiades Battalion!"

Knock-knock.

"Oh, hey, you two! I see you freshened up!"

"Mhm! How do I smell now, Subaru?"

"*sniff* A-a-a-a-h-h-h. A wonderful lavender fragrance. Ten out of ten, E.M.T.!"

"See? That's how you should smell."

"Gr-r-r! I'm not stinky!"

"Stinky, stinky Tella-tan!"

"Sto-o-op!"

"M-m-m! You smell very good too. And I like the way your hair looks."

"Oh! A counterattack by Emilia-tan! Very effective, I'm touched! Though it's just a wet hair. It takes time to dry before I can make my old hairstyle again."

"I think you look very handsome when you wear your hair down like that."

"I concur."

"Wa-a-ah! Emilia-tan, you are playing unfair!" "Same with you, Tella!" "I'm supposed to be the one showering you with compliments!"

"But I want to compliment you too! You look re-e-eally dashing today!"

"I concur again."

"Sigh, Betty's going to raid the pantry for sweets."

"Mhm, just don't eat too much candy, Beako. Your teeth might hurt otherwise."

"Foolish contractor, there's no such thing as too much candy, in fact! See you soon."

"See you soon!" "See you soon!"

"So, Subaru, you said you still remember what happened last night. Can you tell me?"

"Oh, of course, Emilia-tan. It all started…"

It was his turn to tell a story. Satella still remembered the events of last night, of course. Unlike someone, she wasn't a blackout drunk.

"Yeah, but you were rather close."

"I wasn't! I was just tipsy!"

-----

Next, the Sword Saint arrived:

"Lady Emilia, Subaru, good morning."

"Good morning!"

"Hey, Rein."

"Am I intruding?"

"No, not really."

"A bit, but it's fine…"

"Emilia-tan?"

"Oh, sorry, Reinhard. I… I think that was a re-e-eally rude of me to say. It's just that Subaru has a lot of things to do today, and so I just wanted to spend a bit more with him while he is not busy."

"Someone's growing more possessive."

"And you called me a hypocrite, Satella, the Head Witch of Possessiveness."

"Fair enough."

"No offense taken, Lady Emilia. I see that you are a bit busy."

"Hm, does that mean you really like spending time with me, Emilia-tan?"

"Yes, I do."

"Woah? No, denial? No going all tsundere? No, being bashful as usual?"

"M-m-m? I always liked spending time with you, Subaru."

"Wow! You actually went ahead and said it! Did I suddenly gain more reputation points, and Emilia-tan started to like me more? Was the 'naked chest' event that effective? Alright, hopefully this will finally set that route!"

"What are the reputation points?"

"Oh, crap! I should've not said that. Thank God no one here knows what otome games are, otherwise, I'd be a laughingstock…"

"I do, silly."

"Wait, Tella, you do…? When did I tell-…?"

"Back then. Before the whole Calamity thing."

"Ah, curse you, past-me!"

"Pf-f-f-f-f-f. You silly goose! You haven't changed at all! Still a hopeless romantic."

"Stop laughing, Tella-tan! Yes, I like cutesy things and high school drama! What of it!?"

"Nothing. I love you the way you are, dear. If anything the reason I'm that way I am is because I picked up things from you. Also, you're speaking your thoughts out loud."

"Alright, I'll shut up before I drill a hole in the ground from embarrassment."

"Just, please, don't blackmail me with this, Tella-tan. Can't have Emilia know I'm THAT cringe."

"He-he."

"H-m-m, I think I'll go to the kitchen and prepare the breakfast…"

"Wait for me, Reinhard! I have a recipe I haven't tried since I came here."

"Wanna have zosui for whatever reason. Haven't had it in a while."

"Oh, zosui! I love zosui!"

"Do you even eat? I haven't seen you touch food even once as of now."

"No… It's the Authority thing. But seeing you make it again would make me happy all on its own."

"Zosui it is, then."

"What kind of recipe?"

"A soup. It's one that my mother loved to make. Technically, you're supposed to make it primarily in the winter, but I suddenly have an urge to have some right now."

"Of course, I'd be happy to cook with you."

"Ehm, I want to join too, Subaru!"

"Of course, Emilia-tan, help's always welcome. Alright, let's get cooking!"

-----

"Hmm. Combu first."

"Subaru, what's Combu?"

"I've never heard of using river kelp in food before. Well, there's one spice plant that grows near rivers, but…"

"Wait is this Combu, a word for a river kelp, Reinhard?"

"Yes, Emilia-sama, if my Divine Protection of Language Comprehension is correct."

"Subaru's language is re-e-eally weird."

"Don't talk like I'm some alien! It's just a tech-level difference! A lot of modern concepts haven't even been invented yet!"

"See?"

"Certainly weird, Lady Emilia."

"Not you too!"

"Don't worry, I don't think you're weird. Or maybe I just became the same flavor of weird as you are, dear."

"That's not comforting!"

"So, do we have some fresh kelp?"

"I don't think so. Lugunica's cuisine doesn't really have much river food in it. Would you like me to collect some, Subaru? It wouldn't take me long to…"

"I won't send you to the opposite end of the world for some seaweed, Rein! Besides, I don't know if the river kelp here tastes different from the seaweed back home. Let's think of something else..."

"Wait, hold on Tella, you've said I made vegan zosui before. From what?"

"It's made with kelp from Augria. It won't work."

"Right, the river that dried out, I remember. Damn. What to do…?"

"Does this mean we can't make this soup, Subaru...?"

"Hey, don't be sad, Emilia-tan. We'll think of something. Rein, what was that plant you were just talking about?…"

-----

Eventually, they finished making it. Unfortunately, Satella was of no use here, because she couldn't cook to save her life (and they already had a dedicated vegetable cutter in the form of her counterpart). So, she was relegated to silently watching. The food was well received, and her Sage was showered in rightfully deserved praise (including the praise of her own). And Reinhard and Emilia were praised too, I guess. They helped just a tiny bit. Like usual, the people didn't praise her lover enough, in her own opinion. If they had, he wouldn't be so self-destructively selfless.

"That's your opinion, Tella. I think they overpraise me, to be honest. I don't do any-…"

"I won't accept that attitude! You better love yourself right now, mister! Or you'll be sorry!"

Previously, Satella had decided to take a more proactive stance in helping him maintain a good mental state. If he ever needed a pep talk, a lap pillow, or a proverbial slap in the face to get his thoughts in order, she would be the first to do it!

"Sigh. Alright, I yield, Tella-sensei. I'll try my best."

"You'd better, you doofus! I'll be your personal 'the rapist'."

"'Therapist'! Not 'the rapist'! Although, both kinda fit. It feels more like a Freudian slip coming from you."

"'Therapist'! That's what I meant! It's your stupid language that's weird! Also, what's a 'Freudian slip'?"

"I'll explain a bit later, Tella-tan."

-----

"Are you ready?"

"Mhm, all the planning is done."

Satella wasn't particularly useful there either, so she just kept watch. She knew better than to interrupt him when he was deep in thought.

"Thanks for the mass teleport, by the way."

She smiled.

"Always happy to please."

It took a lot of mana. By "a lot", she meant a LOT, more than S.M.B., even. Realistically, only she could cast magic at this kind of level. In teleportation spells, four main qualities decisive: Quantity (the amount of people you need to bring), Duration (for how long the portals have to be maintained), Precision (how critical the accuracy is), and Range (how far away you and your target are). Not every teleportation spell required all four, and each spell had a different purpose and configuration. So, these four qualities made up the QDPR scale, also known as the Quick and Detailed Portal Reference scale (yes, obviously Satella's beloved both named and invented the thing). The scale went from zero to ten, where ten was the most decisive factor and zero is the least decisive one. Example: The Yin Sword Portal Technique was 7-2-9-4, meaning it focused on quantity and precision at the cost of a very short duration and mediocre range. The Door Crossing was 2-10-6-1, meaning it could last forever and was reasonably precise, but had a very short range (relatively to the real space). The mass teleport spell was 10-3-10-10. Obviously, it was very complex and expensive, being only second to the spell that brought her lover back into this world, which was 1-1-10-25 (and yes, Satella had to break the scaling with how far away he was).

"Alright, Tella, you are very cool and strong, but enough of these lectures."

"Wait, you heard all of that?"

"Yup, I can still hear your thoughts. Tella-sensei went on a teaching rant there, heh."

"Why didn't you tell?!"

"To be completely honest, I'm a bit fascinated by the things I developed back then. Besides, your cute ramblings are pleasant enough to listen to."

"Urgh! Doofus!"

""Heh. In any case, I'm ready to go."

"Do you need me for anything?"

"For now, just keep watch."

"Yes, sir. Colonel Satella will keep watch over the VIP, over."

"Pf-f-f. Acknowledged, Colonel Satella. Lieutenant General Natsuki F. Subaru is relocating to the area of operations, over."

"Aye-aye, General! Roger that!"

Chapter Text

"Argh! There's too much light! Way too much light! Why is there so much light? Who designed this room?!"

"You did."

"Ah, I am being an architect of my own destruction… again."

"Te-he. Are you ready?"

"Mhm, I am. There's no way I'm messing up this time. Watch as my master plan plays out, Tella-tan."

"I love it when you're like that."

With that, he entered the throne room. Or the meeting room, technically not the throne room anymore, considering he had destroyed the throne yesterday. Still hidden in his shadow, Satella followed.

-----

"Greetings, gentlemen! Oh, ladies too? Okay, greetings, ladies and gentlemen!"

In Subaru's defense, there were a lot more nobles here in the throne room today compared to yesterday, women included. It made sense – after all, this time, Anastasia had actually made arrangements for this meeting, as opposed to the first one when they just sort of barged in. Emilia, of course, was the first one to follow him inside.

"Alright. Round two of Subaru trying to charm the court. The first one was… so-so. I still can't believe they thought Subaru was Volcanica's wife. That was re-e-eally silly."

Emilia couldn't help but smile as she recalled that event.

"Sir Subaru, I assume you have something more to add to the words you said yesterday?"

"But of course, councilmen and representatives of various noble houses. I do have some things to add. And this time, they won't just be suggestions and demands. Let's talk business. Oh, hey, Volc."

The last bit was directed at the Divine Dragon, who also resided there. Oddly enough, there was no response.

"Oh, that sleepyhead, he nodded off again! Well, let's not be mean to him again and let him nap for a bit."

More than a few eyebrows were raised at such a lax attitude toward this legendary beast (which was also re-e-eally funny in Emilia's opinion). And yet no one was daring enough to scold him for it, of course. Not after the rumors that he is secretly a dragon, which, no doubt, spread after his shenanigans yesterday. Emilia wasn't sure why these rumors were a thing exactly. In her opinion, Subaru didn't seem all that dragon-like, though that might just be because, unlike the others, she knew him quite well.

"Regardless, first, I have to remind you of the various technological projects I intend to pioneer. Roswaal, may I ask how much of an investment are you able to make in these projects?"

"I'd say about seven thousand holy gold coins should be enough to satisfy your ambitions, Subaru-ku-u-un. I was especially interested in the various magical applications of your curious kno-o-owledge. Magitech, you called it, corre-e-ect?"

"Woah, that's a lot! I knew that Roswaal is re-e-eally rich, but not that rich!"

"Mhm. Good enough fund to start on that idea. What about you, Anastasia? How much are you willing to invest in the new industrial facilities that I was talking about?"

"I'm a businesswoman and understand da risks, so, unlike da clown here, I don't intend to rush it. Five thousand upfront and five more after 'bout a quarter. That bein' said, I do intend to provide ya with a labor force."

"Ten thousand! Wow!"

Emilia was surprised by how much money was on the line – eight plus five plus five is… oh, eighteen, right, eighteen thousand! Oh, and the labor force also costs a considerable sum, so it's even more than eighteen thousand. At the same time, she also noticed similar reactions among the gathered Elders and nobles as well.

"Crusch? How much are you willing to provide for the Lugunica's Standing Army Project?"

"Unfortunately, I can't offer as much as the others, Natsuki Subaru. So five thousand, for now. I will offer you a hand in gathering the recruits, however."

"Twenty-three!"

"Reinh- actually the funds of House Astrea are in your control now, aren't they, Heinkel? How much are you willing to provide for the City Revitalization Program?"

"House Astrea offers six thousand. I suggest starting with Flanders… Ouch! Alright, you blonde brat! Flanders and the Slums of the Royal Capital."

The last bit was directed at Felt, who had stomped on his foot just moments earlier.

"Twenty-nine!"

Now it was getting truly ridiculous.

"Wonderful! Absolutely wonderful! Priscilla? I don't know which of my wild ideas you like the most, so you can pick and choose whatever you want to invest in."

"I found them all to be interesting endeavors. Eight thousand across the board."

"Thirty… thirty-seven! Plus an unknown amount required for hiring personnel, so maybe even forty thousand holy gold coins! That's enough to buy… I don't know… a duchy or a city?"

"Mhm. And that's definitely enough for a start."

"What are you getting at?"

"Well, that's just a lot of money. Enough to buy a third of the Capital, alongside with all the pubs, tailors, smithies, artisan houses, and such."

"Yeah, or maybe one of the smaller cities. Or maybe build a new one from scratch?"

"And…?"

"Don't look at me like that. These people expect me to do something with all that money, not just buy myself a fiefdom and sit in it. And I do intend to do something. Consequently, Anastasia, what are the projected profits?"

The latter grinned.

"In optimistic projections, 'bout four times da value at least."

"And in pessimistic?"

"Very pessimistic? 'bout a third of da investment fund. Still quite a lot, as ya can guess, councilmen."

"And my share of them?"

"A quarter. Ya were rather generous, Natsuki-kun."

"Well, it's not my money that is being invested. So I think that's fair."

"Indeed. From us – our money, and from ya – that wonderful head of yos, full of ideas."

"Flattered."

"Gr-r-r."

Emilia felt odd. After listening to their banter, she found herself no longer liking the Merchant Princess for whatever reason.

"Hm, I see. I think I understand what you are getting at. You intend to be a second coming of Hoshin?"

"Second, ha? Rude."

"Well, third coming, actually. My apologies, Lady Anastasia."

Miklotov nodded toward the woman in the big white hat who almost threw a hissy fit at such a blatant form of disrespect.

"Huh, funny you should say that, Mr. McMahon, and you are more or less correct. But I am not just goading you into this endeavor by promising you quadruple returns. The point here is, according to the Council's 'Decree about Royal Selection', paragraph seven… Rem, please. Thank you." The maid passed him a copy of the said decree. "Ahem.

"… Additionally, the Royal Candidates, their Knights, and the sanctioned authorities acting on behest of these Candidates and Knights are given direct and absolute control over the lands and income previously controlled by the aforementioned Royal Candidates, Knights, and sanctioned authorities. Collection of taxes from these lands should be overseen by a delegated member of each Camp and provided directly to the crown's treasury at a reduced rate of six tenths of the Lugunica's tax rate, as set at the time of payment."

"This decree is intended to ease the management of the Royal Candidates' lands."

Miklotov clarified this to the present nobles.

"So you are threatening us with unpaid taxes? Pf-f-f."

"Oh, no, Mr. Eyebrows," such a brash taunt elicited a gasp from the listening aristocrats, "truthfully, I haven't even thought of that, but now that you mention it, we can do that. After all, what will you do about it, ha? But no, the reason I referenced that dull paper is the first part – the 'direct and absolute control'. Frankly, this part means we can legally implement the reforms within the domains of the Mathers, Astrea, Barielle, and Karsten families, as well as in the assets of the Hoshin Trading Company in Lugunica (and outside of it too). From what I understand, all the Candidates have already used that part of the decree on their lands. Each in their own way."

"Aye." "Yes, com- Sage." "Indeed." "That we did, Nii-chan." "You are correct, Subaru-ku-u-un."

"What are you getting at?"

"I'm explaining it to you right now, Eyebrows! Seriously, have some patience, you stu-… ah, never mind. Thank you, Emilia-tan."

Emilia smiled back at him after gently squeezing his hand. With that simple gesture, she got him back on track.

"Ahem. What I am getting at is that we are moving fast. Really fast. When our investments pay off and the dust settles, do you know what will happen then? We will come here again, but we will not be making agreements as equals. No, we'll talk from a position of complete superiority. And we genuinely are superior right now, by the way. I'm just being generous with you lot. So, I suggest that you, the Renowned Elders, and you, the members of various noble houses, jump on the bandwagon while you can."

"Betty's Subaru words mean: either you join us or you'll be left behind, in fact."

"Precisely, Beako. Join me or be left behind. And I have additional projects that may benefit you directly…"

-----

While her knight continued talking, Emilia listened and observed (more attentively this time). For the most part, these negotiations weren't her concern. And she wasn't the only one like that – only the representatives of the Camps that were planning the investments, Subaru, and the members of the Council were active participants. From what she understood, the others were supposed to stand back and project an image of more direct power (brute strength and raw magic) rather than a more diplomatic one. So, what was Emilia doing while the others were parleying? Standing guard near the Sage, listening and learning the art of negotiation. Oh, and she occasionally snuck brief peeks at her beloved knight and squeezed his hand again (not to calm him down, but to calm down herself), guilty as charged.

Subaru's new strategy seemed to work. It felt a bit underhanded, though: just bribery and coercion masked by the grand words and the big promises. However, this approach seemed necessary, especially after the first negotiations went up in smoke. So, pragmatism had to replace idealism, which looked to be the key to dealing with the councilmen. A lot of people who were on the fence about Subaru's previous ideas yesterday looked a lot more cordial to the reform proposals now that they were promised considerable returns. It wasn't just promises with no backing either: as a way to draw in investors, Subaru described in detail one of his gifts to Lugunica: a field cultivation technique and a set of tools that would considerably increase the speed and size of the harvest. This was something tangible, something straightforward, and something that could be implemented and yield great profit just within a year. And that made people listen.

Also those who had previously opposed any changes to Lugunica's political landscape also looked much more timid. It made sense, considering just how many powerful and dangerous individuals (Emilia included herself in that group, of course) were currently standing beside her knight. Oh, and the remains of the Royal Throne, obliterated yesterday, were undoubtedly on their minds as well. The debris was still there, after all. A carrot and a stick, as Subaru called it.

But there was still one who didn't yield – the so-called Mad Dog (or Mr. Eyebrows, as her Subaru said), Bordeaux Zergev.

Emilia couldn't explain why he was so vocal. Maybe it was due to the connection she and Subaru had, it made sense that anyone associated with her would be mistrusted. And at this point, she kind of expected people to hate her and those close to her by extension. Or maybe the reason for his animosity was the fact that Subaru was not a member of a noble house. That was the point of conflict yesterday.

Regardless, this singular isle of the opposition continued to disrupt the almost formed agreement among the Elders and the various other noble houses that attended this meeting today. Although, he was losing his followers rather quickly.

-----

"Alright then, it's your turn to sign the papers, Mad Dog. You're last."

"I said, no."

"Bordeaux, you are being unreasonable."

They were on the cusp of victory. Subaru had to compromise on a few things: the full republic plan had to be delayed for a few years, but an agreement on the creation of parliament was made. The deal between the Sage party and the Elders was finalized. This pact would allow a bunch of elected officials to propose laws for the Council to review and implement. Additionally, a new position of President would be elected to oversee these two branches of government. What he had to compromise on were the parliamentary seats – a couple were guaranteed for a few selected nobles selected by the Council, and the presidential authority – the councilmen were allowed to impeach the president upon reaching the desired amount of votes and veto the unwanted laws submitted by the parliament (with some restrictions on the number vetoed each legislative period).

This time, Emilia made sure to absorb every word said. Though, she might have missed some hidden context. But that's for later.

All that was left to do was for each Elder to sign the papers. Which everyone already did. Except for one – "Mr. Eyebrows".

"Hm, then how about this: Who's up for temporarily suspending Bordeaux from the position of councilman?"

The proposal came from a surprising source – one of the Elders (whose name Emilia, embarrassingly, didn't know), who was the most tolerant of Subaru's proposals, even siding with him during the first parley, voiced that idea. There were surprised gasps from all over the room, as this was something unprecedented – generally speaking, only his death could uproot the Elder from his position.

"Ahem, silence, please."

As always, it was Miklotov who calmed the people down.

"Well, let's put this matter to a vote. If the Council makes a unanimous decision, then I suppose we can suspend him. For the sake of moving this discussion forward. Who is for the suspension of Bordeaux Zergev?"

One hand was raised, then another, and then another…

"Seven. Eight. Nine. That's all of them! Yay!"

"Well, given the number of hands, asking that is rather unnecessary, but still: Who is against the suspension?"

No hands.

"Yes! We've won! Subaru's Great Plan is moving to the next step!"

"No way!"

"It has been decided, then. Bordeaux, please vacate your seat."

"Fuck no!"

"Bordeaux, be reasonable."

"I fucking am! You are the one being unreasonable! You are handing the reins of Lugunica over to this upstart Witch and his lackeys!"

"Emilia-tan is not Wi-"

"I'm talking about you, moron! You're this generation's Calamity, not that foolish half-elf whore! I was wrong about it before, but I see it now!"

"Take. That. Back!"

Both of Subaru's blades were drawn.

"Emilia-sama, please calm down Natsuki Subaru."

"It's okay. Relax, Subaru."

She gently squeezed his hand again.

"And Sword Saint, please restrain the Mad Dog."

"Lord McMahon? He's a member of the Council of Elders."

"Not right now. And soon, we will organize a permanent reti-…"

"Russell!"

Before Miklotov could finish, he was interrupted by the Mad Dog's shout.

"Really? You've already lost."

"I said give it to me now!"

"Sigh. Fine. So long as that debt of mine is considered repaid."

"Sure, just do it!"

The latter threw something to the former. As the object flew through the air, the flicker of the sun shone directly into Emilia's eyes, blinding her momentarily.

"Finally! Activate."

"Huh? What does that me-…"

"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h!"

"Subaru, what's wrong?"

Emilia was quick enough to catch him in an embrace before he fell.

"A curse. A concealed one, in fact. What did you do to Betty's Subaru?"

Suddenly, a dozen purple crystals emerged from the thin air. His spirit quickly grew alert and ready to battle. She was followed by all the others.

"What's the meaning of this, Bordeaux?"

"I'm doing what you are too spineless to do, Miklotov."

"Oi, fucker! Do ya want another spit in yo ugly mug?!"

"Shut it, barbarian. Or your friend's life is forfeit."

However, Emilia paid no attention to anyone else but her knight. Desperately, she called upon her lesser spirits, hoping to relieve Subaru of some of his pain.

"It's a simple trick we use against the Witch Cult. An Od Collapse Curse. An ingenious thing, really, delivered through this spell-storing metia, the ring. A rather barbaric thing to use against someone like him, Bordeaux," his partner in crime answered.

"Shut it! Are you with me or not, Russell?"

"No, of course not! Don't pull me into this, it's just a repayment for that debt in Flanders. I didn't even know you were going to use that. An enforced magical contract would've been way more sufficient. Rather than just murdering him."

"So, what's your plan? Are you just going to kill Barusu in front of us? How would that prevent us from getting our vengeance on you?"

"If you do, there won't be a way to dispel an activated curse. And also…"

-----

"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h!"

"Love, what's wrong? Our connection got severed somehow!"

She unexpectedly stopped feeling his warmth and his endless love for her, that which made the connection between their souls possible.

"I'm… fine… Tellla…"

"No, you are not fine! They did something to you! Us!"

"Subaru, what's wrong?"

"A curse. A concealed one, in fact. What did you do to Betty's Subaru?"

"Calm down… I'm not dying yet… Got bloody resilient from all my experience with these things."

"It still burns you! And I don't know how to explain it, but something's broken within your soul!"

"What's the meaning of this, Bordeaux?"

"I'm doing what you are too spineless to do, Miklotov."

"Oi, fucker! Do ya want another spit in yo ugly mug?!"

"Shut it, barbarian. Or your friend's life is forfeit."

"I'm still here, Tella. In the worst case, just bring me back, okay?"

"No, you don't get it! I can't do that without our bond! You will come back still, but your Authority will not work properly without my interference!"

"I… try not to die, then… Keyword: try."

"It's a simple trick we use against the Witch Cult. An Od Collapse Curse. An ingenious thing, really, delivered through this spell-storing metia, the ring. A rather barbaric thing to use against someone like him, Bordeaux."

"They broke your Od, that's what's happened!"

"Yeah, I see,… Tella… Hurts a lot, by the way."

"I'll tear off that stupid ring alongside his hand!"

"No, stay there and control yourself, Tella. I don't want another Envy incident… again…"

"Shut it! Are you with me or not, Russell?"

"No, of course not! Don't pull me into this, it's just a repayment for that debt in Flanders. I didn't even know you were going to use that. An enforced magical contract would've been way more sufficient. Rather than just murdering him."

"Gr-r-r! I'll rip those two ap-a-art!"

Satella's blood began to boil with anger. No, even ripping them apart wasn't enough. Too merciful. Nothing must be left of these cowards!

"Tella, no!"

"But!"

"NO! I'll… deal with it!"

"So, what's your plan? Are you just going to kill Barusu in front of us? How would that prevent us from getting our vengeance on you?"

"If you do, there won't be a way to dispel an activated curse. And also…"

Abruptly, Satella was ejected from the Astral Walk and shoved two dimensions backwards. Her last way to communicate with the Sage shattered too, leaving her both blind and deaf to his plight.

That left her alone with just her own thoughts. And that was the main issue. She was the main issue. Envy was still inside her mind, and she wasn't pleased by this.

The Authorities were straightforward for the most part. You acquire the Witch Factor, you wish for something that's in line with your respective sin, you get to be unstoppably powerful, and, after a while, it turns you mad. If you are compatible. If you are not compatible, you have to pay the price: items, riches, mana, limbs, lifespan. Could be anything, really. In her case, it was the half of herself, not that Satella understood what that meant at the time. That price is what birthed her counterpart.

They were not all too separate. Envy wasn't a fully independent being, not a complete persona, rather, it was something in between, something semi-conscious. An inkling, a compulsion, an intrusive thought that occasionally overtook her. They were too close to one another, you couldn't tell where Satella ended and Envy began. Envy was still a part of Satella, and Satella was, in some ways, Envy-like. This meant that every breath she took was accompanied by her whispers. And each time she failed to control her impulses, she was very much aware of what she was doing at the behest of her Envious side. She wasn't sure if that was better than just losing herself completely or worse.

"Save him. Protect him. Love him."

"N-n-no! We're staying put! He has so many friends on his side! They can deal with it!"

They weren't exactly words – just unrefined concepts that she uttered to Satella, which she in turn couldn't help but speak out loud. The Witch didn't understand normal words, just the raw intentions behind them. If anyone else could see the Sage's lover now, it would look as if Satella was talking to herself. It would look like she was the sole actor in a play, switching roles with each sentence.

"Useless. Foolish. Powerless."

"No, they aren't!"

To prove the Witch's point, images of his false pasts flashed before Satella's eyes: her innocent counterpart bleeding out on the floor with him, the twisted corpses of both oni sisters, failing to protect the mansion, the blonde spirit vanishing into nothingness, the magician being devoured by a horde of rabbits, the merchant being cut down by the tiger, who in turn was destroyed by her shadows.

"You couldn't protect him before…"

Satella could see her point.

"Correct. Certain. True."

"But maybe now they can…"

"Dying. Suffering. Perishing."

"I know!"

They were powerless without him before. But maybe now, when everyone is there to protect him, they can do… something? Anything?

"Lost. Hidden. Unknown."

"Right, but if he doesn't Return by Death, we can still find him once the curse is lifted…"

"Dying. Will be reborn. Restored."

"I know! I know he's dying, Envy!"

"Will be lost. Alone. Separated."

"We'll be fine! And he'll be fine, too! He can always find a way to restore the connection and find us!"

"Sad. Lonely. Afraid."

"I am too!"

"Save him. Protect him. Love him."

"Ah…"

A tear sprang from her eye. At the same time another image flashed before her eyes – his dying body, confused, afraid, and alone. And then another tear fell. And then another image, another death. And then another tear. And then another. And then another… And…

Satella was quickly losing this battle.

-----

"… And also…"

Suddenly.

"Huh? Where did…?"

"Mana nullification? Ah, I see… another contingency against us."

For a moment, Roswaal's voice lost its familiar tone and grew angrier.

"It might be my doing. Not intentional, mind you. There is a plentiful amount of mana annulment stones installed here, activated by a very specific device, creating a field of absolute nullification. Never knew they were aware of my gift to Farsale."

"Old records."

"I see…"

"Od dammit, Dona! Why do ya keep creatin' problems for us?"

"My apologies, it was a contingency against an old partner of ours. It wouldn't have worked against her, but I still did whatever would make Farsale feel safe."

"Stop chatting, you i-… *cough* …idiots, and pull that fucking ring off him. Cut his finger if necessary."

"Sh-h-h. Don't talk, Subaru! You're losing blood!"

With her mana nullified, Emilia was panicking internally. But, in order to protect Subaru, she remained strong and tried to stabilize him using more mundane means – by tearing apart one of her sleeves and using it as an improvised bandage.

"That wouldn't work either. And if everyone else takes one more step or tries anything funny, this trinket will burn Sage's entire mind out."

"Ah, go fuck yourself, you old asshole. Cor Leonis."

"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-h-h!"

Unexpectedly for everyone, including herself, Emilia screamed as an immense pain struck her head. It felt like her head… no, not just her head, her whole body was being crushed. It was so sudden and so intense that she even lost her grip on her knight. Yet, Emilia wasn't the only one.

"Sorry, Emilia-tan, Beako. Just bear a bit of it for a moment."

She understood – he was giving them a bit of the burden that he was currently carrying. Emilia could barely hear his voice or see anything, as her ears were ringing and her eyes were watering non-stop. And yet she endured. For him, she did. She almost missed him drawing two of his blades and saying:

"Then fucking kill me here, you coward. Or I'll… kill… you. A-a-a-argh!"

She couldn't hear anything else because her pain had just quadrupled. Or quintupled? Emilia wasn't sure exactly. All she was now sure of was pain. She fell to her knees, as her legs refused to carry her, in fact, she just barely kept herself from collapsing completely prone. The contents of her stomach tried to go outside of her, and her lungs burned as if she was in a flaming building. Everything, absolutely every part of her body, was asking, begging for this pain to stop. It made her want to cry like a little child and call for Puck, Mother Fortuna, Geuse, anyone! And yet, some part of her realized that she was probably experiencing only a small portion of the hurt Subaru was feeling.

But then, just as unexpectedly, the sensation vanished. She slowly got back up and then noticed that she and Beatrice weren't the only ones affected by Subaru's Authority and, consequently, the effects of this curse: most of the people who came here were affected to various degrees. Only some seemed to be unaffected, and they were currently guarding those who were.

"So, I see that both radical factions in the Council are at arms against one another. Gentlemen, I don't believe it's wise to start another civil war."

"Shut it, fence-sitter. When I'm done, things will go right back to how they used to be. Don't you want that, Miklotov?"

"No, they will not, Bordeaux. You've already passed the point of no return."

"That is to say, no Royal Candidate will accept you now. Neither will the Dragon."

"Doesn't matter, none of these whores are fit to rule, and that beast is useless anyway!"

"Blasphemy! I thought you were reasonable, Bordeaux!"

Even his former allies were turning on him.

"Hm-m-m, the effects of the Od Collapse seem to be taking more time than expected. Natural curse resistance, perhaps? Still, you have about five minutes, or he will be done."

Russell's last words drew people's attention to the Sage, lying on the ground. And this made Emilia finally realize why her pain had stopped – Subaru was unconscious. She quickly sat down, placed his head on her thighs, and began checking him up. For a brief moment, she feared the worst, but after pressing her ear to his chest, she could still feel his heartbeat. They still had some time, though that fact did not make her feel relieved at all. His condition was quickly worsening: he was barely breathing, his skin was very pale, his eyes were unfocused, and his lip was bitten through. Occasionally, a brief seizure shot through his body, confirming just how dire his current situation was.

Subaru, her Subaru, was hurting… And she could not do anything about it. That was a lot worse than just experiencing this pain herself. An old nightmare resurfaced in her mind again. One where she held a broken form of her knight.

It was so unfair! Her knight came to them, proposing prosperity, security, fairness, and happiness for all the people of Lugunica, and what did they do to him?! They shunned him, hurt him, hurt her, threatened to kill him just to keep their place! Vile, corrupt, repugnant people, all of them! What's worse was just how detached they were from our pain! Still arguing over their stupid politics!

Something hot sparked inside her as a dark thought emerged in her head – the desire to hurt them back. It was just like when Mother Fortuna died, when she lashed out at Pandora (and everyone else in the forest by an extension).

"COWARDS! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!"

The room went silent.

And then something else began to occur. At first, nothing felt unusual. But then a loud buzz sounded throughout the room, indicating an overflow of mana in the hidden mana crystals. And then, the temperature began to rapidly lower. And lower. And lower.

Indiscriminate and uncontrolled, the spell affected everyone in the room, including Emilia herself, as an overabundance of mana caused ice to cover her limbs. Not that she did not know how to use it more safely, as she had years ago, no, it's just her mental state was too distraught to utilize it it properly. In fact, her mental state was so poor that she wasn't even aware of what she was doing. There was only one person who was almost completely unaffected by her tantrum – her beloved knight in her arms.

"I hate you."

"Ah, shit! Someone stop the foolish girl! I don't want to fucking freeze to death in here!"

"Do it yoself, idiot. Stop da bloody curse. That's da only way."

"Lady Anastasia. It is not the only way. We can…"

"Cowards."

"Shush, Julius. No hurting Lady Emilia! I don't want to freeze to death, either, but stopping lass with force would make anyone doing that an enemy number one in Natsuki-kun's eyes. IF (!) he survives this."

"How is she doing that? Didn't you say that those crystals nullify all mana?"

"I hate you."

"There are only two spellcasters in the world that these stones won't stop. We're just dealing with one of them for now. So, I suggest you," a half-elf with pink hair pointed at the conspirator, "to dispel the curse and mana nullification."

"I hate you."

"Alright, alright! There!"

"I ha-… Subaru?"