Chapter Text
‘Are we all clear?’ Burgh said. ‘No questions?’
They were standing in the Gym’s final battle area. Burgh had just finished explaining the plan for the false art exhibition to the Gym Trainers.
‘Totally clear,’ said Kerry. ‘This is real cloak-and-dagger shit. I like it.’
‘Remember,’ Shadow said, ‘you can’t say a word to anyone. Or this whole thing is over before it even starts.’
Kerry saluted. ‘No fear. We’ll all keep our mouths shut.’
Louis was wringing his hands. He looked a little green. ‘Still… even a fake exhibition… there’s going to be so many people here… all looking at my art…’
‘As they should,’ Burgh said. ‘You’re an extremely talented artist, Louis. Have faith in yourself.’
‘It’s going to be hard to pull this all together in a week,’ said Jack. ‘Especially since the Gym is going to be open the entire time. Are you sure we can do it?’
‘Completely sure,’ said Burgh. ‘Or, um, mostly sure, anyway.’
Clarence grinned. ‘This will be chaos. I smell an upcoming entry to the Burgh Board.’
‘The what?’ said Shadow.
All four Gym Trainers turned towards her, wearing identical mischievous expressions.
‘Nothing,’ Burgh said. ‘Just a silly little –’
‘You haven’t seen the Burgh Board?’ said Kerry.
‘No.’
‘Come with us. Now.’
‘Hey!’ said Burgh. ‘We’re still meant to be planning –’
But Kerry was already leading Shadow away, towards the Gym canteen. She rooted in a cupboard for a moment, before emerging with a whiteboard.
‘This,’ she said dramatically, ‘is the Burgh Board. It’s a catalogue of all the weird shit that happens to him.’
‘Show me?’ said Shadow, taking the board from Kerry’s hands. ‘Let’s see… entry one, dated a vampire.’
‘Grimsley’s not a vampire!’ Burgh said, from the doorway. ‘He was my boyfriend in college. He’s human, he just dresses weird.’
‘And has fangs,’ said Jack.
‘And an obsession with darkness,’ said Clarence.
‘Entry two, got lost in Castelia Sewers,’ said Shadow. ‘Why were you even in Castelia Sewers?’
‘I’ve got friends down there.’
‘Don’t say it like that,’ said Kerry. ‘You like the Bug-types that are down there, you don’t have a sewer buddy.’
‘Let’s see,’ said Shadow. ‘Got poisoned by a Venipede, got poisoned by his own Venipede, accidently terrorised a bunch of hikers in Pinwheel Forest… I’m sorry, made it onto a cryptid show and was too embarrassed to admit it?’
‘Half the rumours about Pinwheel Forest are because of Virizion,’ Kerry said. ‘It guards the forest from intruders. The other half are Burgh. Because he likes to sleep up in trees like a Bug Pokémon.’
‘In a cocoon and all,’ said Jack. ‘So when a bunch of ghost-hunters went looking for this alleged half-man, half-moth…’
‘Elesa says I’m not allowed to go to Pinwheel Forest for inspiration anymore,’ Burgh said. ‘That’s why you found me in Nacrene City.’
‘Speaking of Virizion, the next entry says hung out with Virizion. And in brackets, we think he was drunk.’
‘No!’ said Burgh. ‘No, that did happen. There was wine imbibed, yes, but I did meet Virizion.’
‘Led a parade of Venipede to Castelia Park with a flute like some kind of pied piper. What is it with you and Venipede?’
‘Unova’s most perfect creature.’
‘Am I on here?’ She skimmed the entries. ‘I am on here. Earned the undying loyalty of a hot ninja.’
‘I feel like that’s understating the situation,’ Burgh said.
‘Which part?’ said Shadow. ‘My undying loyalty, or my hotness?’
‘I, um –’ His face flushed pink. ‘The, um, the fact that you basically stalked me. Not to do with loyalty, or, um –’ He gestured to the Gym. ‘I think Leavanny’s calling me? I’ll be back.’
The Gym Trainers were snickering behind their hands. Burgh ducked into the Gym.
‘Interesting board,’ Shadow said, leaving it down. ‘But we should probably get back to what we were doing.’
‘Right, the exhibition,’ said Louis, as they followed Burgh. ‘I can try and get some of my art put up today, if the three of you are okay to cover incoming challengers.’
‘Sure,’ said Kerry. ‘I don’t think the Gym Pokémon need too much fussing over today, anyway. We can ask Burgh to check them over after hours.’
Burgh had paused in the battle area. His eyes were closed, and he was muttering to himself.
‘One-way system will have to be in place… that means signs. Ushers. Posters, some kind of announcement on social media… Some way for the thief to know. Assuming they aren’t monitoring me already… Balance between my pieces and Louis’s, dependent on room, lighting… need somewhere for the Gym Pokémon to go…’
‘Everything okay?’ Shadow said, crossing to stand beside him.
‘All part of the process, darling!’ He struck a dramatic pose. ‘Diamonds form from coal, after all! The pressure of the forge is what leads to a masterpiece!’
‘That’s Burgh for you,’ Clarence said. ‘Always some mad scheme on the go.’
Shadow frowned at Burgh as he marched away, already gesturing to Louis, asking for his thoughts on art placement. Was there something too bright in his voice? Something too dramatic about his movements? But then again, she’d never been the best at understanding emotions. Her own, or anyone else’s.
She said nothing.
*
But the feeling that something wasn’t right didn’t go away.
It was like watching a puppet, or a clown. Something uncanny. Even as more problems piled up, Burgh’s smile stayed in place, growing more and more fixed as the day wore on.
It didn’t help that everything seemed to be going wrong. More challengers than usual, a sickly Sewaddle, delays in getting artwork hung. Juggling which rooms were open to challengers, and which were being set up for the exhibition.
She only saw that smile drop once. It was when Burgh slipped away from the others to get a drink from the canteen. Shadow followed him, unseen.
He was slumping against the counter, staring into space as he opened the tab on a lemonade. Without the smile, he just looked… destroyed. Exhausted.
‘Hey,’ Shadow said, from the doorway.
At once, he straightened up, beaming. ‘Shadow! Hello. I thought you’d stayed outside.’
‘You’re weird,’ she said.
‘Yes! I am. I think the Burgh Board established that.’
‘No. I mean you’re being weird.’ She hesitated. ‘Are you… sad? Or something? Is that it?’
Burgh tilted his head. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
But she didn’t know what she meant either. ‘Whatever. Just… I don’t know. Be less bubbly.’
He chuckled. ‘I can’t help my personality.’
Shadow narrowed her eyes, and vanished from his sight. She mooched back through the Gym, until she was standing near Jack and Clarence.
‘Is Burgh being weird today?’ she said.
Jack dropped the pile of papers he’d been holding, and scrambled to pick them up. Clarence, intently stitching a piece of a Sewaddle’s cloak, didn’t even look up.
‘Hey, Shadow,’ he said. ‘No, he’s not being any more weird than usual.’
‘Where did you come from?’ Jack hissed. ‘We’re in the middle of an empty room, how did I not see you?’
Shadow ignored him. ‘He’s not… smiling too much? Being too cheery?’
Clarence frowned. ‘He’s allowed to be happy.’
‘That’s not happy. That’s… freaky.’
But both of them were staring at her as if she’d lost her mind. Shadow let out a frustrated growl. Maybe she was making it up? If no one else believed it, she had to be making it up.
By the end of the day, she’d almost convinced herself. Burgh was fine. It was fine. It wasn’t her business. It wasn’t.
It was easier to tell herself that when they were in the Gym. When he was busy talking to other people, or when they were in separate rooms. It was only when the day ended, when they were finally alone in the lift, that she couldn’t deny it.
Burgh was swaying ever so slightly on his feet. Eyes unfocused. Like a mask had slipped off his face, with nothing beneath it.
‘Burgh?’ she said. ‘Are you okay?’
‘Hm? Tired, that’s all. Long day.’ He heaved out a sigh as the lift stopped. ‘Home now.’
‘Why don’t you go and paint something?’ Shadow said. Trying for gentle. Something was wrong, she could see it in his wire-taut posture, but she didn’t know how to fix it.
‘Paint,’ Burgh repeated. ‘Paint, paint, yes, I suppose I shall. Fill the day! Fill the hours.’
‘Or… go to bed? Or…’ What was she supposed to suggest to him? ‘Have… a drink? Something like that? Watch the TV?’
‘I can’t watch the TV, silly. That involves sitting on the couch, and you are currently sleeping on the couch.’ Burgh blinked. ‘That’s not a very nice arrangement… Are you sure you wouldn’t like to go to a hotel somewhere? Or you could take my bed? We can swap out, I’ll take one night on the couch, and then you can take the next…’
‘Shh,’ said Shadow. ‘I’m happy. Your couch is fine.’
‘Hmm,’ Burgh said. ‘Painting… yes, painting…’
He wandered away from her, and into his bedroom. A moment later, she heard him walking up the stairs to the loft.
She glanced over at Pawniard, who was sitting on the end of the couch. ‘What do you think?’
Pawniard shrugged.
‘I don’t know either.’
The moments ticked on. No sound from upstairs. Was that good or bad? Was she supposed to do something? The Gym Trainers hadn’t noticed anything amiss… She had to be making it up.
Burgh had been so patient when she’d needed it. She didn’t like that she couldn’t return the favour.
There didn’t seem to be anything she could do. It might be better all around if she just went to sleep.
She pressed her hand against Pawniard’s head as she settled in on the couch. ‘Thanks for looking out for me,’ she said. ‘Keep an eye out again tonight.’
Pawniard saluted.
There was a lot that have might have kept her awake. But that particular night, she was asleep almost at once.
*
Something pulled at her sleeve. She woke up, expecting sunlight, but it was still dark.
‘Hm?’ she mumbled. ‘Wha…?’
It was Pawniard. Pawniard was tugging at her sleeve. It wasn’t in an attack stance, but she thought it looked worried.
‘What?’ she said, keeping her voice as quiet as she could. Already scanning her surroundings, waiting for a threat.
Pawniard nodded towards the door to the kitchen. It was pulled mostly shut, but there was light spilling around the corners.
Shadow slipped off the couch, silent and wary. Her feet made no sound as she stole over the floor.
It was Burgh. He’d braced himself against the counter, head hanging low. The coffee machine was spluttering to life, but it couldn’t hide the sound of his voice. Nothing she could make out as words, but a long unbroken stream of nonsense, muttered syllables.
‘Hey,’ Shadow said.
He didn’t jerk away from her. Just raised his head slowly. The expression in his eyes was distant. ‘Oh. It’s you. I’m sorry, did I wake you?’
Shadow took a few steps closer. ‘It’s late.’
‘Yes… Yes, the perils of a shared kitchen. My apologies. I’ll go now. Very busy. I can do it, you know, I can.’
‘No. I mean it’s late for coffee.’
‘Hm! Nature’s nectar. Much to do, you know, much to think about.’
‘What?’
‘I’ll go, if you like. Hardly need the coffee anyway.’ Burgh tried to step around her, but she blocked him.
‘You’re talking nonsense,’ she said.
‘Ah! Tends to happen to me. Stressful periods, and so on. Once this art exhibition is over, all will be well.’
‘Go to bed.’
‘I can’t. Much too much to do.’ He heaved in a breath. ‘Pamphlets, proposals, phone calls, emails…’
‘Go to bed. You can’t work like this.’
‘I don’t have a choice. It has to be done.’
‘Burgh. Bed.’
Burgh started to cry.
Deep, wrenching sobs that sounded as if they were being dragged up from the depths of his chest. He covered his face with his hands, but she could still hear it, still see his shoulders shaking.
Shadow just stood there. What was she supposed to do? What could she do?
‘Hey,’ she said. ‘Um.’ After a moment, she reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. ‘Don’t cry. Please.’
Except Burgh was leaning forward – leaning into her. As if his body couldn’t hold up his weight anymore. Resting his head on her shoulder. Still crying.
Shit. Fuck. What was this? Shadow tried to process it, the sudden closeness of him, the weight, the heat, the soft scent of his shampoo. It took her a moment to work out what was happening.
She’d seen this on TV. She could guess what she was supposed to do. Carefully, she put her arms around him, patted his back. ‘There,’ she said. ‘It’s okay. Please stop crying now.’
‘Sorry,’ Burgh whispered. ‘I’m sorry, Shadow, I shouldn’t be putting all this on you.’
Shadow backed him towards the fridge, and pressed him against it, so he couldn’t slip away from her. Burgh lifted his head to look at her. His eyes were red, and his cheeks were flushed.
‘All this?’ Shadow repeated. ‘What is all this?’
‘I’ve been so worried,’ he said. ‘Just… eaten alive by it. The past few days. Months.’
‘About the exhibition? I told you. I’ll protect you.’
‘It’s not just the exhibition. It’s everything.’ Burgh took a shaky breath, and for a horrible moment, she thought he was going to start crying again. ‘You’re not always going to be here. What if something like this happens again? How am I supposed to create anything if I’m always afraid that it’s going to be destroyed?’
Shadow hesitated. ‘Burgh…’
‘I can’t sit at the canvas without picturing it ripped to shreds,’ he whispered. ‘I can’t design new sculptures without picturing them shattered into dust. What am I going to do? How am I ever going to create again?’
Her instinctive response was to tell him to get over it. But she could guess that wouldn’t help the situation.
‘Burgh,’ she said. ‘Listen. I don’t know much about art… but does it matter? If the art survives or not?’
Burgh squawked. ‘What do you mean? Of course it matters! It –’
She pressed her hand over his mouth.
‘Shh,’ she said. ‘What I mean is… You told me that your sculpture helped you become the Gym Leader. That people proposed under it. That it was used as part of an arts festival. None of that is going to disappear just because the statue did. It still existed. It still stood. It stood for years.’ She hesitated. ‘Some things matter, even if they don’t last.’
She lifted her hand. Burgh’s breath fanned across her mouth, warm and sweet. ‘Yeah,’ he whispered. ‘I guess.’
‘Something I learned in Team Plasma is that it’s no good to hold onto physical things. Too easy for them to be taken away.’ Shadow reached for Burgh’s hand. She held it between them, tracing the long elegant lines of his fingers, feeling his pulse thundering in his wrist. ‘Knowledge, skills, memories… those can’t be taken, or destroyed. Even if someone destroys every artwork you make, for the rest of your life… you’re still going to have that skill. That vision. The process matters just as much as the result.’ She interlaced their fingers, and squeezed. ‘Yeah?’
Burgh swallowed. ‘I… Yeah.’
His breathing seemed calmer now, steadier. The trembling she’d been feeling had faded. His eyes seemed clear, focused.
Good, Shadow thought, mission accomplished.
Burgh lifted his other hand, gently looping it around her shoulders, beneath her hair. His fingers lightly brushed her spine, making goosebumps break out along her arms.
‘Shadow,’ he murmured. His breath soft against her lips. They were pressed so close, so far into each other’s space. If she wanted to, she could – she could –
No.
She couldn’t even be thinking about it. There was a line, a line she couldn’t cross if she ever wanted to tell anyone that this was business and nothing more. She was already brushing up against it. She couldn’t… she couldn’t…
‘Glad we sorted that,’ she said, letting go of his hand, and taking a step backwards, out of his embrace. ‘You should probably get some sleep now.’
‘Oh! Oh, I, um… um, okay…’ Burgh pressed his fingers against his lips, in an almost unconscious gesture. ‘Yeah… Sleep…’
‘Come on.’ She took his elbow and steered him of the kitchen, towards his bedroom. ‘I don’t even know what hour of the night it is.’
‘Wait!’ In the doorway of his bedroom, he turned around.
‘No excuses.’
‘Knowledge, skills, memories,’ Burgh said, the words falling out in a rush. ‘That’s what you said was important, right? What’s your favourite memory?’
Shadow raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Stalling again?’
‘No. No.’ That familiar earnestness was creeping across his face. ‘I really do want to know. Please.’
She hadn’t ever told anyone about her favourite memory. It was something she kept in her heart, something warm and steady and beautiful.
‘I won’t tell,’ Burgh said. ‘If that’s what you’re worried about.’
‘You think you can keep a secret?’
‘I’ll take it to the grave. I promise.’
Even if there came a day where he broke that promise… she was right. Nothing he could do would take that memory away, or destroy it.
She leaned in, lowered her voice. ‘A few years ago, I was sent on a mission to the Village Bridge. It was past midnight, and most of the lights in the village had been turned out. All I could see as I was leaving was stars, filling the sky.’
She paused, unable to suppress a smile as the memory unfurled.
‘And the aurora.’
Ribbons of light, filling the sky from horizon to horizon. Soft waving curtains of light, making her feel small as a blade of grass in comparison. She’d stood there, eyes wide, hardly daring to move or breathe, until the sky had dimmed into black again.
‘I’d never seen them before. I’d never even known they could be visible from Unova. It was a winter night, and the sky was full of colour. I was the only person awake for what felt like miles. It was like it had happened just for me. Like a secret.’
A secret all her own. A secret she’d kept in her heart until the day that Lux had gathered them in his room and suggested that when they were alone, they might call themselves by different names. She’d stood there, thinking of the beautiful and secret thing she’d seen, and had told them that she wanted to be called Aurora.
‘That’s wonderful,’ Burgh breathed.
‘Right.’ She reached out and lightly tapped his nose. ‘And it was special because it never happened again. Some things are better for being fleeting.’
He smiled. ‘So you’ve said.’
‘Goodnight, Burgh.’ As she walked to the couch, she glanced back over her shoulder. ‘And do try to sleep, yeah? I’ll hear it if you go upstairs.’
‘It’s okay, Shadow. I won’t.’ He hesitated. ‘And, listen… Thank you. You’ve given me a lot to think about.’
She’d given herself a lot to think about. As she settled onto the couch again, she tried to ignore the soaring sensation in her chest.
Some feelings couldn’t be given space. They couldn’t.
*
Something was different between them after that.
It was in the small things. Burgh, handing her a coffee, letting his hands linger a moment longer than they strictly needed to. Or when he was showing her something on the Xtransceiver, she would lean into his space for a proper view. Close enough that their breaths could have mingled, if her mask wasn’t on.
‘I have the number for that place in Driftveil City,’ he said. ‘So if you ever want to talk to your friends, you can call them.’
‘I’m not sure I can,’ she said. ‘I’m not sure if they’ll even want to talk to me.’
He’d rested his hand on her shoulder, squeezed slightly, then let it fall. ‘When you’re ready, the option’s there.’
It was like an invisible barrier had fallen between them. As if it was okay to touch, now, if they needed to, or wanted to. Shadow never let strangers into her space, but Burgh wasn’t a stranger. Not anymore. He wasn’t family, either. She wasn’t sure what the word for him might be. He was just… Burgh. It was nice, in a way, to have that closeness with him.
But she wasn’t above putting it to use for mischief.
They’d been in the Gym practically since sunrise. Balancing the exhibition, the challengers, the needs of the Gym Pokémon. Shadow kept an eye on Burgh, pulled him aside when she felt he needed it. He would assure her he was fine, with a smile that was tired but happy. But it was past sunset now, and Shadow could see the wear in him, the exhaustion he was trying to suppress.
Jack and Clarence had gone home. It was just Kerry and Louis left, arranging artwork, or brushing dust out of corners, or setting up signs. They looked exhausted, too. This had gone on long enough.
Burgh was gesturing to Kerry, explaining something to her. Shadow appeared out of the darkness to stand at his side.
‘I think we should go home,’ she said.
‘Yes,’ Kerry said. ‘We’ve worked enough for today.’
‘But the work is only getting started!’ Burgh said. ‘There’s so much to do, if everything is to go smoothly.’
‘Burgh,’ Shadow said. ‘Remember what we talked about the other night? You need sleep.’
‘How do you expect me to pull together an exhibition without work? A certain level of sacrifice is expected, you know.’
‘But you’ve been on the move since this morning. Nearly twelve hours. You need to rest.’
‘Really, we can handle it,’ Kerry said. ‘Shadow’s right. There’s not much we can do here tonight, anyway.’
‘Nonsense,’ Burgh said. ‘There’s so much more to do! I –’
‘Burgh,’ Shadow said, ‘if I have to carry you upstairs, I will do it.’
Kerry and Burgh craned their necks to look at her.
‘You couldn’t,’ Burgh said.
‘Of course I could. I could do it with one arm.’
He was looking at her with an expression that was half amusement, half incredulity. ‘You wouldn’t.’
‘Is that a challenge?’
‘No…’ He gestured towards the artwork still leaning against the wall. ‘Ten more minutes, maybe half an hour…’
Shadow looked at Kerry. ‘You can manage by yourself?’
‘Oh yeah. We’ll be fine.’
‘Great. Come on, Burgh.’
‘I – What – No! Shadow!’
Shadow caught him around his knees, and hoisted him up onto her shoulder. She took a moment to adjust to the weight, and then set off for the doorway. Burgh drummed on her back with his fists – not enough to hurt, but in protest.
‘Shadow, what are you doing?’ He was trying to sound stern, but it was undercut by the fact that he couldn’t stop laughing. ‘What on earth are you – Why –’
‘Goodnight, everyone!’ Shadow called. ‘Remember to lock up!’
In the lift, she gently set him down. He held onto her arms a minute, swaying slightly, still giggling as if he was drunk.
‘I can’t believe you,’ he said. ‘I can’t believe you just did that.’
She suppressed a smile. ‘I told you I would.’
Burgh was smiling. Cheeks flushed, hair tousled, expression soft and fond. ‘I’m glad I met you, Shadow.’
There were lines. Lines that shouldn’t be crossed. Shouldn’t be. Shouldn’t. And yet...
‘I’m glad I met you too.’