Chapter Text
Family meeting called. Please convene in the Batcave at 19:00 hours. – B
About time. – R
This really isn’t necessary. – RR
Please only use Batcave channels for relevant commentary. – O
Thank you, Oracle. – B
That includes you, Batman. – O
[Shuffling, followed by the scraping of chair legs against the floor. A click.]
J: So, another one of these meetings, then?
B: Yes.
Du: At least Babs could make it this time.
Ba: Sorry about that.
J: Eh.
[More shuffling.]
Di: So, B, what’s this about?
B: Some things have been brought to light by the first episode of the documentary—
T: We really don’t need to do all this.
J: Shut it, Timmers. I wanna hear what he has to say.
A: Master Jason.
J: Sorry Alf.
T: I’m just saying, we don’t need to make some spectacle of the conversation. This meeting, it’s not necessary.
Da: Tt. You say that now, Drake, but if you had just responded to my messages instead of ignoring me like a petulant child—
B: Would you rather have this conversation in private, Tim?
[Silence.]
T: Am I just going to have to tell everyone one by one after the fact anyway?
Di: Timmy.
[Silence.]
T: I’m fine.
C: Lying.
S: Sorry, I’m confused. What is this meeting about?
Da: The so-called-hitmen Drake has been associating with.
Du: Private military contractors, right?
S: What about them?
C: League. Assasins.
[A lot of speaking at once.]
Di: What?
Da: You knew?
Du: Hang on, hang on—
J: Shit dude, you’ve been holding out on us.
T: Listen—
Ba: Everyone, please—
A: Gentlemen. If we could have a modicum of order.
[Silence. Several apologies.]
T: When Bruce was lost in time, I knew I’d do whatever it took to get him back. That involved teaming up with the League of Assasins. Don’t worry, I double-crossed them. It’s fine.
J: Any other surprises for us?
T: Not really. I don’t know what the documentary has found out. I don’t think they know I lost my spleen.
[A lot of yelling at once. Shuffling. The recording ends.]
@waynewatch:
@Tim-Drake-Wayne spotted at coffee shop with #draperdoc assistant director @BernardDowd’sShadowGovernment.
143k likes, 19k comments
>> i ship it
>> once again proof that Tim isn’t actually evil
>> so alvtim was the past and timber is the future right
>>>> timber is the present, babes
@waynewatch:
@Tim-Drake-Wayne spotted at restaurant with @reformedHarleyQuinn, Poison Ivy and Catwoman.
[Blurry photo of a restaurant table. All three rogues are in full costume, and Harley has a large hammer propped up next to her in the booth. Tim is sitting awkwardly between Poison Ivy and Catwoman. He appears to have ordered lasagna.]
140k likes, 17k comments
>> WAIT WERE THEY SERIOUS ABOUT THE GOSSIP
>> is he cheating on Bernard :(
>> only in gotham can three rogues just sit down in a restaurant in full costume
>> what do you want to bet catwoman absolutely robbed him blind
@LexLuthor:
It should go without saying that it is inappropriate for public figures to associate themselves with wanted criminals. I call on @theWaynes to apologise for the disrespect to victims of crime and lawlessness in Gotham City.
16k likes, 48k comments
>> OMG HE FORGOT TO DISABLE THE COMMENTS
>> L LUTHOR
>> FUCK YOU DUDE
>> GIRL WE ALL KNOW YOU’RE A CRIMINAL
>> didn’t this guy vote against gay marriage
>> hang on did this dude just tag the wayne parody account
>> HOLY SHIT HE DID
@theWaynes:
we’re so sowwwwwy lexy wexy – Bruce xoxo (call me)
84k likes, 32k comments
>> I love these guys so much
>> gotham’s best parody account
@LexLuthor:
I apologise for any unprofessional mistakes in my last post.
12k likes – Comments Disabled
Duke: Jason, that’s your parody account right
Jason: nooooooo
Jason: ,,,
Jason: maybe
Duke: you’re a fucking legend
@GothamGreenlight:
The second episode of the #draperdoc is now out! It has a runtime of 43 minutes, 16 seconds. #whatdidtimdo
1.4m likes, 312k comments
>> here we go again boys
>> you have no idea how hyped I am for this
>> if this doesn’t confirm alvtim I’m going to cry
>>>> they’ll save that for the finale
@clairedelune:
are we doing bingo cards again this time or was that for the first episode only
7k likes, 419 comments
>> I think we’ve learnt not to try predict things
>> we will never be right
>> I still want to know who the surprise guest is
>>>> imagine its straight up alvin
@stickittotheflan:
“It’s not that unusual for Gotham kids to be missing school records, thanks to the upheaval of frequent gang wars and high crime rates” oh Gotham never change
3k likes, 406 comments
>> there’s no place like home
>> nowhere else in the world
>> any other city and I’d think alvin draper wasn’t real, but this actually makes me believe it more
@metropolisrail:
what do you mean having no records or documentation at all is normal in gotham, you guys fucking scare me
42k likes, 19k comments
>> THE OFFICIAL METROPOLIS RAILWAY ACCOUNT????
>> what are you doing here
>> don’t you have like. Train stuff to be doing king
@metropolisrail:
wrong account sorry guys, please don’t get me fired
44k likes, 17k comments
>> I love this so much
>> get a raise for train guy please
@draperscapers:
of course the first ever recorded appearance of this guy was a fucking ninja camp, where else
19k likes, 6k comments
>> this is actually so in character
>> now did batman send him or did he go voluntarily
>> bro imagine batman just sends his robins to summer camp to train
>> new theory unlocked omg
>> no wonder he quit
@liveinthemoment:
IT’S KYLE TIME OMG, I LOVE THIS GUY
[A screenshot of youtuber Kyle Reinhardt sitting down in the interview chair with a big smile. His channel name is included in a little bubble at the bottom left corner of the screen.]
6k likes, 237 comments
>> he’s actually my favourite youtuber
>> girl he’s the best
>> the only motivational speaker I’d ever listen to
@gotham’smanwhore:
WAIT DID HE JUST SAY ALVIN DRAPER IS FROM EASTLYN???
212 likes, 26 comments
>> one of us, one of us
>> do you think we know him
>> holy shit maybe it’s kenny
>>>> who the fuck is kenny
>>>> alvin draper, keep up
@sillybillie:
It’s okay, Kyle, I too would choose sketchy ninja training camp over Camp Flabaway
11k likes, 1k comments
>> no but fr
>> I heard it wasn’t that good actually
>> yeah no shit, they were secret criminals
>> my friend went there and he didn’t even get the ninja outfits his dad paid for
@sylviaw:
no seriously do you know how hard you have to beat up a kid to trigger an asthma attack, shit’s fucked up
7k likes, 316 comments
>> clearly you’ve never been to summer camp
>> clearly you’ve never been part of a cover for recruiting children into a burglary ring
>> clearly you’ve never been to gotham
>> no but she is right
>>>> oh 100%
@mangotango:
so alvin rolls up, beats the shit out of some child abusing ninja, and then that evening Robin busts the whole lot for being a secret recruitment ring for burglaries AND NO ONE RAISED ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THAT SEQUENCE OF EVENTS??? LITERALLY ALL THE CLUES WERE THERE, GUYS
16k likes, 3k comments
>> how has no one ever put this together before
>> well tim drake knew obviously
>>>> do you think they’d met yet
@timdrakebemyhusband:
there hasn’t been enough tim in this episode yet :(
9k likes, 487 comments
>> bro there hasn't been any tim, where are you looking
>> yeah I’m really missing him
>> wasn’t this episode meant to be about their shared roots
>> guys we just gotta give it time
@laila207:
guys it's here, this is my sister’s lamaze instructor
[A blurry photo of a TV, progress bar putting them under halfway into the episode. An older lady is now sitting in the interview chair.]
18k likes, 6k comments
>> still can’t get over the fact you were telling the truth
@queenbatman:
I love that alvin was first seen in a ninja summer camp, then dropped off the map and reappeared at a lamaaKJFGHJKDSFGH SORRY WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY HE WAS THERE TO SUPPORT STEPHANIE FUCKING BROWN???? HELLO?
29k likes, 14k comments
>> oh that’s a live reaction live reaction
>> this is how we’re all feeling
>> girl when was she even pregnant
>> this feels like a breach of privacy
>> definitely the sort of thing you don’t want your lamaze teacher revealing
@timdrakebemyhusband:
hang on hang on, isn’t stephanie really close with the waynes and good friends with tim
7k likes, 420 comments
>> holy shit you’re right
>> this explains so much
>> its all coming together
@clairedelune:
guys does this mean tim hooked up with steph’s ex
9k likes, 504 comments
>> i mean. it explains how they know each other
>> not sure how I feel about this one
>> it’s okay guys, the ship’s still sailing. Maybe
>> better alvtim then alvsteph since bro clearly can’t use protection
>>>> please don’t give the mpreg guys any ideas
@annasdiamonds:
[Three photos of the show on a tv, all displaying the exterior of a hospital. Put together, the subtitles read: “Though Stephanie rejected an interview, we knew there were more leads to follow before the trail went cold. After all, she had to give birth somewhere.”]
this is…really fucked, right? that’s not just me? this feels like a huge invasion of privacy
12k likes, 3k comments
>> yeah, major misstep imo
>> she probably rejected an interview for a reason
>> okay how long until bruce actually sues them
Tim: bernard wtf is this
Bernard is typing
@queenbatman:
OKAY I FEEL BAD FOR STEPH’S PRIVACY BUT WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALVIN TURNED UP TO THE HOSPITAL IN FULL SCRUBS AND PRETENDED TO WORK THERE TO BE AT THE BIRTH????? WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY REALISED AND JUST MADE HIM STAND OUTSIDE WHEN THEY LEARNT HE WASN’T THE FATHER, BUT ASKED NO QUESTIONS AND LET HIM KEEP THE OUTFIT??? THE MOST GOTHAM WAY OF HANDLING THIS I CAN’T EVEN
30k likes, 16k comments
>> its not very often that I agree with metropolis but this is insane
>> yeah I’ve decided I’m having my kid at home
>> can you imagine what could have happened if they didn’t know each other
@aboutdamntime:
I can’t get over the absolute unit those nurses presented against the documentary omg, Abebe with the information about Draper and only Draper, and Jennifer and Cassidy with the total insistence on steph’s privacy and the recitation of hospital policy
9k likes, 2k comments
>> so proud of them honestly
>> did you see the absolute glare Cassidy sent when they tried to ask about her
>> these are women with principles
>> I think Jennifer was about to throw hands the whole time
>> still don’t think they should have let draper stay unquestioned but they did well here ig
@totheloo:
all I got from that was alvin isn’t the father, the ship lives on
6k likes, 347 comments
>> I’m all for alvtim but gal there’s a time and a place
>> how long till the lamaze class goes under for data protection breaches
Bernard is typing
@BruceWayne:
I understand the want to understand Alvin’s story fully, but this should never come before a teenager’s right to privacy and autonomy. Nothing in the episode would have been impacted by censoring her name and information. I can only express my deep disappointment in #thedraperdoc for their mishandling of such a sensitive period in someone’s life, and assure them they will be hearing from me more on this matter.
813k likes, 176k comments
>> oh holy shit before the episode even ended
>> go off bruce
>> the thought of him actually pausing the ep and going to do this straight away is honestly so sweet
>> protective dad-adjacent-male-figure moment
>> wait guys is this gonna affect timber
Bernard: I’m so so sorry, I really fought for them to censor it
Bernard: but I could only do so much
Bernard: assistant director, despite the credit the internet gives me
Bernard: I know that’s a bad excuse but it’s the truth
Tim: you could have at least warned us
Bernard: I’m so sorry
Bernard: I was so focused on later reveals I didn’t even think about it
Bernard: sorry
Tim: yeah
Tim: I need to go talk to Steph
Bernard: sorry
Tim: ok
@mangotango:
[A clip from the episode. The screen is split into two: Kyle and Natasha. Each is giving a description of Alvin Draper—stubble, piercings, shades. A large red jacket.]
love that abebe can’t be included in the montage because of draper’s weirdass hospital disguise
12k likes, 2k comments
>> what I want to know is if draper only had one jacket or multiple identical ones
>> scooby doo ahh wardrobe selection
>> ofc red robin’s jacket was red too
>> the bats really have colour scheme issues
Illcitrick:
What the fuck was that
4k likes, 139 comments
>> holy shit holy shit holy shit
>> dfkghlksjdfghldjkg
>> I have no words
>> abort mission
>> that was the most insane rug pull of all time
clairedelune:
[A clip from the documentary. Kyle and Natasha are still side by side, both holding a photo. A voice off camera asks: “does this look like Alvin Draper to you?” They answer that it does. The voice says: “This is an image of Tim Drake edited to have stubble and piercings.”]
WHAT WHAT WHAT THE FUCK I’M CRYING
9k likes, 480 comments
>> what is happening
>> I don’t know what to say
>> that interpol guy must feel so vindicated right now
@nickthelick:
Is anyone feeling a bit dubious about this? I mean, “this is a photo of someone edited to look more like the person you described, does it look like him?”
8k likes, 413 comments
>> heartbreaking, the worst person you know made a good point
>> I mean, it’s not that big a change
>> I kinda buy it
@timdrakebemyhusband:
those two tim interviews back to back were foul, like did you see the way his expression fell in the second one??? whatever paper they passed to him gave him psychic damage, I felt so bad for him
8k likes, 512 comments
>> literally
>> it looked like the smile had been smacked off his face
>> “the only connection we have is when I was stopped in Iraq” in the first to “Where did you get this?” in the second
@totheloo:
THEY’RE BROTHERS?????!!???!?!?!?! FDJKLGH
6k likes, 398 comments
>> I’M SOBBING
>> is this how they felt when return of the jedi came out
>> MY FANFICS WTF
>> NO NO NO
>> half-brothers, not that it’s better
>> and then they ended the episode too
>> I’m fucking devestated
@totheloo:
MY HOPES AND DREAMS
6k likes, 362 comments
>> LITERALLY
>> rip alvtim ig
>> so when are you deleting your ao3 account
@clairedelune:
picking up the pieces of my broken heart wtf
10k likes, 670 comments
>> same here
>> I was halfway through my next chapter too
>> so many fanfics abandoned
>> millions of voices cried out in terror and were silenced
>> I can’t believe my otp were fucking brothers
>>>> careful how you word that
>>>> don’t even
@timdrakebemyhusband
is everyone moving straight to timbern, then?
7k likes, 466 comments
>> give me a second to grieve first, jesus
>> still think he and Harley are a match made in heaven
>> is he even going to want Bernard after this episode’s treatment of steph
>> just the enemies part of friends to enemies to lovers
Bernard: hope you and steph are doing okay
Bernard: let me know if there’s anything I can do to make this better
Bernard: and I know I’ve said it a lot
Bernard: but I really am sorry