Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Friday, September 27th, 2019

The Last Drop is Zaun’s most bustling bar, a community staple in the Lanes. It’s been standing since before Zaun even had a name, and is home to the men who named it. It’s always warmly lit, busy with patrons from both Zaun and Piltover who usually aren’t the scum of the earth. Ever since Zaun became its own borough within the Greater Piltover Area twenty years ago, it’s now semi-normal for people of some of the richer parts of the GPA and Zaun to fraternize. But a Zaunite can still pick out the Pilties from the crowd, and vice versa. 

Every Friday night, Viktor returns to the bar to either have drinks with friends or, like tonight, get a hookup. He sits cross-legged at the end of the bar with a tumbler of whiskey, wearing a simple pair of black slacks and a relaxed sage green dress shirt with his hair cascading over his shoulders. Most Fridays there is some kind of show, like the alternative rock band playing tonight, so Viktor has become unwillingly familiar with the local music scene. He’s been scanning the crowd for the last hour and no one has really captured his interest, so he might give it one more drink before he calls it quits for the night.

“Hey, can I buy you a drink?” 

Speak of the devil. Viktor turns his head to the source of the voice, finding a tall, muscular man with tanned skin, dark hair that reaches the nape of his neck and a beard to match. Gorgeous hazel eyes are windowed by a pair of black and silver browline glasses from where he’s seated on the stool next to him. He’s wearing a simple red wine coloured dress shirt tucked into black dress pants, like he just came from the office or something. Ah. A rich Piltie. Probably wants to get his rocks off sleeping beneath him or something. Viktor turns away from the crowd towards the stranger, giving him a coy smile. “I’ll take free alcohol any time.” 

The man grins, waving down Vander. “What do you want?”

“Another whiskey on the rocks, top shelf if you’re feeling generous.”

“A refined pallet, I see.”

Vander comes around and the man orders for Viktor, plus a beer for himself. Giving Viktor a knowing smile, Vander holds a thumb up when the man flirting with him turns his back to the bartender. So Vander thinks he’s safe. Good sign.

“Jayce,” the man says, holding out a broad hand to shake Viktor’s. 

He’s never… shaken hands with someone trying to hit on him but he finds it amusing, so he decides to lean into it. Shaking Jayce’s hand and noticing how much larger it is than his own, he says, “Viktor.”

“Viktor. I like your name. I also like your enchanting honey eyes.” Jayce flashes him a grin that says he was probably class president in high school or something. It’s kind of charming. 

Finishing his drink, he smirks slightly. “Thank you. I could say the same about your hazel. My favourite eye colour, in fact. I find they look very pretty in the dark.” He makes sure his last words are dripping with innuendo, hoping to get a reaction out of the man.

Jayce flushes a little at that, about to say something, but Vander returns with their round. “Thanks, Vander,” he says as he slides a few bills his way, tipping generously. Clearing his throat when he turns back to Viktor, Jayce continues, “Thank you. Um… do you come here often?” 

Viktor barks out a laugh, shaking his head. “Really? That’s your line?”

“Hey, it’s a good question! The one thing in common we have right now is the bar, so why not talk about it?”

“You have a point. To answer your question, yes, I come here often. But, honestly, I don’t care about finding things in common. Are you looking for a boyfriend?”

“Uh… well, no, more like a one-night type of thing.”

“Exactly. So we don’t need to know anything about each other,” Viktor says, taking a sip of his whiskey. “Do you want to fuck me?”

“I—um—what?” Jayce stares at him with wide eyes, hesitating.

“Do you want to fuck me? I don’t think you came over here just to tell me my eyes are enchanting.”

“I mean… yeah.” 

“I’m trans, does that bother you?”

“No, I’m bi and not a transphobe.” 

“Then finish your beer and let’s get out of here.”

“Really? Just like that?”

Shrugging again, Viktor looks pleased. “Just like that. I don’t care for small talk.”

Jayce starts chugging his beer eagerly, pausing to ask, “Wait, where do you live? I don’t know if your place is closer—”

“Oh, it definitely is. No need to take me over the bridge, Piltie.” 

“I—how can you tell?” 

“You work an office job, clearly, and Zaun is mostly working class. Plus, that watch looks awfully expensive. You didn’t think it was obvious?” 

Glancing down at his silver, black-faced watch, Jayce frowns. “So what you’re saying is I should leave that at home and maybe not come directly from work?”

“It’s a good idea if you’re trying to fit in.”

“Noted. Maybe I’ll keep that in mind for next time,” Jayce says with amusement, quickly finishing his beer. Viktor follows suit and downs his whiskey, not savouring it as much as he usually would have, but he wants to get home sooner rather than later. 

“I can get the Uber,” Viktor says, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “I need to grab my coat.”

“I need to get mine too,” Jayce says, holding out his hand. “Gimme your coat tag and I can get yours.”

Viktor eyes him suspiciously before taking the little white tag out of his other pocket. “Don’t steal my very expensive corduroy jacket. It cost me twenty dollars at a thrift store.”

Jayce laughs, and the warmth of it makes Viktor’s scalp tingle. He has a nice laugh and he’s pretty cute. His entertainment for the night takes his tag and heads to the coat check. Viktor waits as patiently as he can, tapping his foot against the barstool. Jayce doesn’t seem to be wasting any time though because he comes back only a minute later wearing a black overcoat. He holds out Viktor’s dark brown wool-lined jacket for him to put on and Viktor decides to accept the offer.

“Thank you, what a gentleman,” Viktor comments before pressing the button to order the Uber. Grabbing his forearm crutch that was leaning against the bar, Viktor then heads toward the exit. They only have to wait two minutes in semi-awkward silence before a Tesla pulls up. Viktor groans, muttering under his breath, “Fucking ridiculous death traps.”

“Agreed,” Jayce comments, but Viktor doesn’t realize he heard him. “Fuck he-who-shall-not-be-named.”

Viktor chuckles while waiting for the driver to open the door, reaching over from the front seat. Outrageous design if we can’t even figure out how to get in the damn thing.

When they’re finally inside, Viktor goes on his phone to kill time in the eight minute drive to his bungalow in the more developed part of Zaun, just outside of the Lanes. He has a few work emails from Powder about their prosthesis connector project that he skims. She’s always been chaotic in her communication because either via email, Slack or texts, she has to send at least three follow-up messages before he gets the chance to reply. There’s also a text from Sky asking if he wants to get dinner tomorrow. He sends her a quick response, just confirming, then puts his phone away with a sigh.

“Let me guess, work emails?” Jayce asks with amusement, looking up from his own phone. “I have about a dozen waiting for me.”

“Yes, my assistant has a habit of sending me five emails when it could have been one,” Viktor says before realizing he volunteered a little too much information. He can tell Jayce is intrigued by the way he raises one eyebrow and smirks slightly but Viktor waves him off. “Nevermind. We’re almost there.”

Two minutes later, Viktor is opening his front door and turning on the entryway lights. Revealing his simple home with beige walls and dark brown herringbone flooring. The living room is visible from the front door with his forest green rug, cream-coloured sofa, dark wood coffee table and 40-inch smart TV. 

He hears the subtle thump of Rio jumping down from her tree by the patio door and thirty seconds later, she’s there to greet him with a shrill meow. She’s a regal little thing, a white long-hair with bright blue eyes. Viktor fell in love with her the moment he saw her at the shelter when she was only five months old. That was two and a half years ago and he’s never regretted getting her as a companion.

“Aw, cute cat, what’s its name?” Jayce is stripping himself of his coat and dress shoes while Viktor shrugs off his own jacket and kicks off his loafers. 

“Her name is Rio,” Viktor says, not caring whether or not a one-night stand knows the name of his cat. He crouches and scoops her up in one arm, holding her to his chest like a baby. “Ajoy prdelička, did you miss me?”

“What language is that?”

Sighing and rolling his eyes, Viktor replies, “You ask a lot of questions.”

Jayce shrugs. “Just curious.”

“You’re here to fuck me, not figure out where I’m from,” Viktor says before kissing Rio’s head and putting her down. Starting to head down the hall he says, “Bedroom’s this way.”

He hears Jayce follow him and Viktor doesn’t bother turning on his bedroom light, thinking it’s illuminated enough from the moonlight coming in through the parted brown blackout curtains. 

It’s a big room, big enough for his desk covered in paperwork, his MacBook and a few succulents. His walls are coated in various art—mostly photographs of Zaun from a local artist he likes or nature photos he took himself—but one of them is an abstract painting Powder did of a neon butterfly when she was sixteen. She gave it to him as a gift and while it’s not his exact taste, he keeps it for the sentiment. Admittedly, his room is a little messy, with laundry pouring out of his laundry hamper onto the mossy green carpet, and too many books piled on his nightstand. There’s even a coffee mug and a plate with a muffin wrapper on it still on his desk from last night.

Viktor doesn’t care if Jayce thinks his room is messy, he’ll never see him again anyway. Always the down-to-business type when it comes to his hook ups, he sits on his bed, sets his crutch aside, and starts to unbutton his shirt. However, Jayce stops him.

“I’d like to do that, if you’ll let me,” Jayce says, standing in front of him with a hopeful look in his eyes. It’s so earnest that it makes Viktor feel a certain type of way he can’t name. 

“Knock yourself out,” Viktor says, shrugging as his arms drop to his sides. Jayce kneels and his broad fingers start to unbutton Viktor’s dress shirt, revealing his back brace which Jayce looks at curiously. 

“Do you need to keep that on?”

“No, as long as you’re not bending me in half, which I do like but is usually not worth the back pain.” 

“I can be gentle.”

“I did not say be gentle. You can fuck me as hard as you want, just in a comfortable position.”

“Good, because I like to be rough,” Jayce chuckles, pushing Viktor’s shirt off his shoulders and reaching for the velcro fastenings of his back brace. “Is it okay I take it off or do you want to?”

“I don’t care. I’m not going to crumble if you take it off, you know that, right?” Viktor arches a skeptical brow at Jayce.

“No, I know—well, actually, I don’t know. What’s your limitations?”

“My right leg is a bigger concern than my back. I can bend it at the knee, the hip is more challenging, but in general I can’t do anything strenuous with it.” 

With careful hands, Jayce takes off Viktor’s back brace, sliding the straps off of his arms. “So what positions do you like?”

“Missionary is easy but can sometimes be boring. I like riding but it can be tiring. I actually have one of those sex pillows so I can lie face down with my hips elevated, so that’s also an option,” Viktor says, deciding to reach over and begin unbuttoning Jayce’s own dress shirt. 

“I like the sound of all three, but let’s stick with what’s easy. Can I kiss you?” 

Viktor hums in thought, focusing on getting Jayce’s shirt off. I don’t always kiss hookups but… Jayce is cute and something tells me he might be a good kisser. “Sure, why not?”

Immediately, Jayce dives in, capturing Viktor’s lips. It catches him off guard, prompting him to make a small ‘mmh’ sound, but he quickly returns it. His tongue swipes over the seam of Jayce’s lips and he opens his mouth eagerly to welcome Viktor in. Licking into Jayce’s mouth, Viktor buries his hand in his hair, pleasantly surprised how soft it is, while his other hand finishes unbuttoning his shirt. 

Jayce’s hands go to the front of Viktor’s pants just after he shoves Jayce’s shirt off and to the floor. Pushing Viktor onto the bed and following him, Jayce kisses him like he’s starved for touch. The amount of passion he’s putting into it makes Viktor glad he agreed to kiss him, because not all men know how to use their mouths. Keeping one hand tangled in Jayce’s hair, the other scrapes at Jayce's shoulder. His pants are finally dragged downward and Jayce breaks the kiss to remove them completely, revealing his briefs and leg brace.

He finally gets a good look at Jayce, assessing his half-naked body. His chest, forearms and navel are covered in a generous amount of dark hair that pairs well with the full beard. Viktor can also see he’s fit, all muscle showing he spends maybe a little too much time at the gym. Sakra, he’s hot. I love a man with body hair.

“Can I mark you up?” Jayce’s eyes are pleading, and that’s when Viktor recognizes he has fucking puppy eyes. 

“No,” Viktor replies, deadpan. The puppy eyes don’t work on him.

Jayce sighs with disappointment before nodding at his leg brace. “You want that off too?”

Viktor rolls his eyes at Jayce’s disappointment but moves on. “Yeah, I shouldn’t need it.”

For such large, calloused hands, Jayce is extremely gentle and careful while he’s removing Viktor’s leg brace. At that moment, he can’t help but wonder what Jayce does for a living to have such delicate movements with all those callouses. He thought he was just some office worker Piltie, but it seems Jayce gets his hands dirty too—it makes him significantly more attractive. But, that doesn’t matter. He’s not going to see Jayce again. 

Once his leg brace is off, Viktor looks downward toward Jayce’s pants. “A little balance? I’m not about to get naked when you’re still half-dressed.”

“Would it make you feel better if I just ripped the bandaid off and got naked?”

“That would just be convenient.”

“I do like to be a man of convenience,” Jayce says before standing and undoing his belt. 

In moments, he’s pushing his pants and underwear down and… oh. Viktor tries not to stare but, even with only a semi, Jayce’s size is impressive. It's also beautiful, uncircumcised and leaning a little to the left as it grows. Sure, it’s not the biggest he’s had, but he finds that men with big dicks often don’t know what they’re doing with them—they think their size negates the need for skill.

“Like what you see?” Jayce grins playfully, prompting Viktor to roll his eyes again.

“Alright, yeah, you’ve got a big dick which is promising. We’ll see how good you are with it, though.”

“I’d rather show you what I can do with my mouth and fingers first.” Getting on his knees again, Jayce pulls Viktor’s briefs off, raking his eyes over what’s underneath. “Can I eat you out and finger you?”

Viktor’s heating and insulation isn’t the best so he shivers when he’s fully exposed. Didn’t expect that. They usually just want to get their dick wet. “I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

Jayce wraps his hands around each of his thighs—svatý kurva, his hands can hold my thigh entirely—and he hooks them over his shoulders. Dragging Viktor to the very edge of the bed, he kisses up the inside of his left thigh before breathing hot against his pussy. As Jayce drags his tongue from his entrance to the tip of his cock, Viktor lets out a shaky breath and starts to comb his fingers through Jayce’s hair. 

Parting his lips with two fingers, Jayce dips his tongue inside him, prompting him to shift his hips to meet the invading muscle. When Jayce is done tasting him, he slips one finger inside Viktor while he moves to tease his cock. Viktor shudders at the flick of Jayce’s tongue and his thick finger rubbing against his sweet spot, proving that he at least knows where to find it. 

“I can take two,” Viktor says quietly, gripping Jayce’s hair by the roots, just to hold. 

Jayce obliges without skipping a beat, gradually pushing in a second finger before taking Viktor’s small cock in his mouth and sucking. Inhaling sharply, Viktor tugs instinctively, curling his other hand in the duvet. The stretch from his fingers is comfortable but it’s the way Jayce’s mouth works at his cock that has made him so responsive. Though, Jayce’s mouth doesn’t get all the credit, because his fingers curl into his g-spot, making him moan deeply. 

“Kurva, jsi dobrý,” Viktor mutters to himself, squeezing his thighs around Jayce’s head. The slick sounds coming from Jayce’s mouth and his pussy are obscene, demonstrating how enthusiastic Jayce is. He feels Jayce’s fingers spread apart to open him up before rubbing up against his g-spot again, and it’s evident how wet he is already. Panting, he says in English, “I can… I can take three.”

Jayce hums around Viktor’s cock, the vibration making him shiver, and the stranger pushes a third finger inside him. The stretch is more intense this time but nothing he can’t handle. Rather than rubbing up against his sweet spot, Jayce begins to pump his three fingers in and out of Viktor at a pace that progressively builds. The combination of Jayce furiously fingering him, and passionately sucking and licking his cock, brings him to literal tears. They trickle down to his temples as he begins to babble in Czech, not even certain what he’s saying.

His orgasm hits him suddenly when Jayce’s fingers thrust inside him at just the right angle. He exclaims, “Oh, kurva,” while his body convulses and he cries. Jayce finger fucks him through it before he removes them so he can taste Viktor’s release straight from the source. In the haze, Viktor lets him—for an orgasm that good, he’d let Jayce do just about anything to him.

“Stop,” Viktor rasps after a minute, tapping his fingers on the back of Jayce’s hand. His body is limp in his bed partner’s grip and he feels boneless. His legs remain hanging over Jayce’s shoulders and his arms stretch out at his sides as he recovers. Taking deep breaths, he continues. “I need… I need five minutes before you fuck me too.”

“We can also call it a night if you’re too tired,” Jayce says, his lips and beard gleaming with slick in the moonlight, and that surprises Viktor. He hasn’t gotten off at all and yet he’s offering to leave after giving me an orgasm? Okay…?

“No, I still want to but… I appreciate the offer. I wouldn’t leave you high and dry though, I’d at least blow you for making me cry.”

“How kind of you,” Jayce says with a chuckle. “I just wanted you to know I didn’t expect anything from you.” 

“That’s rather generous. Most men would be telling me to hurry up so they can get inside my cunt already, if they even eat me out first.”

“Well, I’m not like most men. I actually enjoy oral sex, it’s not a chore.” To emphasize his point, he kisses the inside of Viktor’s right knee, right where he knows there’s a mole. The simple action makes his stomach flutter with pesky butterflies because usually his hookups rush him, but Jayce seems content to take their time. “Where do you keep your condoms? I have one in my pocket if you’re all out though.”

“I’m always well stocked. Nightstand, top drawer.”

Putting down Viktor’s legs finally, Jayce reaches over to open the drawer, peering inside. He knows the only things in there that aren’t condoms and lube are vibrators. “Nice collection you have,” Jayce says, taking out one of the lubricated condoms. “Would you want to use one?”

Viktor blinks at Jayce. Most men would be confident that I wouldn’t need it, simply from their egos… “Uh, no, I should be fine without it.” 

Arching a brow at Viktor, Jayce replies, “Just because you would be fine doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be fun.” 

“While I appreciate it, I do just want you to fuck me. If you know what you’re doing, it’s pretty easy for me to come without stimulation to my dick.” 

“Good to know… I think your dick’s cute, by the way.” The way Jayce grins is so wildly earnest he has a hard time believing this man is real. 

“Cute?” Viktor huffs out a laugh. “I’ve never gotten that before.”

“Well, it’s true. I like the way it peeks out and the shape of it. Very nice to suck on too.”

A flush grows on Viktor’s cheeks as he processes the compliment. He’s quickly learning that Jayce is, in fact, not like most men. “Uh… thank you?” 

“What? Is it weird to compliment people on their genitals?”

“I guess not, just, I haven’t? Some people have even been turned off by it.” 

“Well those people are idiots.” With the condom obtained, Jayce stands and… holy shit. Not only is Jayce bigger when hard, he’s hard just from eating and fingering him. The head of his cock is red with arousal, the prominent veins obvious from the skin being pulled taut. 

If Viktor had to guess, Jayce is probably seven inches. Again, not the biggest, but he’s thicker than the biggest he’s had. That’s going to feel so good inside me. He might just be the perfect size. At this point, I believe he knows what to do with it, too.

Jayce doesn’t seem to have noticed Viktor practically ogling him, more focused on getting the condom out and rolling it on. In the meantime, Viktor moves up the bed to get more comfortable, lying on his back and waiting for Jayce to join him. Climbing between his legs once the condom is on, Jayce gets close and his cock slides against Viktor’s, making him shudder with anticipation. 

“You ready?” Jayce asks, taking hold of Viktor’s waist with one hand and his cock in the other.

“Yeah,” Viktor nods, hooking his left leg around Jayce’s hip. Moments later, Jayce lines up with Viktor’s entrance and pushes in, taking it slow. Even though he gave Viktor three fingers, it’s still a bit of a stretch, but Jayce’s cock fills him up so well once he’s buried inside. 

“Mierda, te sientes tan bien,” Jayce groans, and Viktor doesn’t know what it means except he can identify that it’s Spanish, and the words ‘fuck’ and ‘good’. Leaning down, Jayce places one hand on the mattress while the other holds Viktor’s left thigh. 

“That’s hot, keep doing that,” Viktor says before cupping the back of Jayce’s neck and pulling him down to kiss him again. His other arm loops under Jayce’s left to hold onto his shoulder and his heel presses against Jayce’s lower back to get him to move. 

Jayce takes the signal and draws back his hips, speaking in between kisses. “What? Ah… speaking Spanish? Mm, as long as you… keep speaking whatever language you don’t want me to—”

Viktor cuts him off by sticking his tongue in Jayce’s mouth, hinting to the other man to get on with it. Needing no further prompting, Jayce proceeds to fuck Viktor hard and deep, the head of his cock colliding with his cervix, repeatedly making Viktor moan loudly. A particularly rough thrust has him breaking the kiss and he gasps, “Ó bože, přesně tam.”

“You like that?” Jayce does it again, knocking out a choked moan from Viktor. “God, you’re fucking sexy. Podría follarte toda la noche.”

Without another word, Viktor crashes their lips together again as Jayce pounds into him, groaning against his mouth. Jayce opens him up with his tongue while holding onto Viktor’s thigh with a bruising grip. I hope he leaves his fingerprints behind. His orgasm is quickly approaching and he digs his nails into Jayce’s shoulder, holding on for dear life as Jayce ravages him with his mouth and cock. 

Viktor can’t continue to kiss Jayce, breathing heavily with exertion as his lips brush against Jayce’s. He begins rambling in Czech, mostly repeating ‘kurva’, ‘ano’ and ‘sakra’. A loud, primal sound leaves his mouth and his thighs tremble as he comes, scraping his nails over Jayce’s shoulder and nape. Jayce continues to fuck him through it, making him whimper with pleasure, until he shudders and groans violently as he spills inside the condom.

They both pant, trying to catch their breaths, and Viktor goes entirely limp beneath Jayce. Pulling out, Jayce rolls over and lies next to Viktor, chest heaving. “Mierda, you’re fucking amazing.”

“My pussy’s that good, huh?” Viktor chuckles, running a hand through his hair. 

“Understatement.”

“I don’t think I have to say you know what you’re doing.”

Jayce laughs softly, and it makes Viktor’s scalp tingle again. Something about his laugh is just… pleasant, soothing even. Pointing over to the closed door across from the bed, Jayce asks, “That your bathroom?”

“Yeah.”

“Mind if I clean up? I’d like to clean you up too, if you’ll let me.” 

Viktor turns his head to look at Jayce, who’s already looking at him with an earnest expression, smiling subtly. Something about it makes Viktor’s stomach twist in knots. Most of his hookups aren’t this considerate and would run as soon as they were done. Jayce is different… a good different. “Yeah, go ahead.”

Jayce leaves for the bathroom and Viktor gets a good view of the back. Svatý kurva, he’s got a great ass. And those back muscles… Bože, he’s probably my best lay in a long time. A minute later, Jayce comes back with a damp cloth and gets on the bed between Viktor’s legs. Gently, he cleans his thighs and pussy, making Viktor quiver with sensitivity. 

“Thank you,” Viktor murmurs, feeling heat pool in his cheeks. Something about the tenderness and intimacy of the action makes him flustered, and he’s usually not one to get flustered around other men.

“You’re welcome,” Jayce says with a handsome grin, tossing the cloth into the overflowing laundry hamper. Crawling up to bracket Viktor’s shoulders with his hands, Jayce smiles down at him. “Would you mind if I kissed you again? I liked making out with you a lot. You’re a good kisser.”

Viktor hums, actually considering it. Usually, he’d say no and tell his hookup to get the fuck out. But, an impulse leads him to say, “Yeah, I’d like that. I don’t think I could go again, though.”

“That’s fine, I just want to kiss you.”

Jayce lies next to Viktor and they lazily make out. He can’t even keep track of the time. If he’d have to guess, at least fifteen minutes go by—kissing, touching, groping, petting, and bumping into Jayce’s glasses—though it could have been longer. Viktor’s lips feel kiss-bitten and he knows his hair is a mess from how much Jayce has been playing with it, though he can say the same for Jayce. 

“I hate to cut things short,” Jayce says quietly, caressing Viktor’s cheek gently. “It’s, um, a bit of a trip back to my place and it’s already past one.” 

“I didn’t even realize the time,” Viktor replies and he feels a little mournful that their tryst is over already. It’s probably the most fun he’s had with a casual partner in recent memory. He just seems to have a natural chemistry with Jayce that almost feels addictive.

“Trust me, I don’t want to go, but I have a brunch to get to in the morning.” One more time, Jayce leans in and kisses Viktor, slowly and tenderly this time as he cradles his face. Viktor can’t help but sigh into the display of affection, and a part of him yearns for something like this. I have to be practical. I can’t have it. I won’t allow myself to have it. When Jayce parts from Viktor’s lips, he says, “Thanks for tonight, I had a lot of fun.” 

“Yeah, me too,” Viktor says before he sits up and grabs a t-shirt that’s hanging off the back of his desk chair, pulling it on. Jayce, in the meantime, starts putting his clothes back on. “I’ll walk you out.”

“Nirvana. Nice,” Jayce comments, nodding to his shirt as he’s buttoning up his own. Sure enough, Viktor realizes he’s wearing his shirt with the Nevermind album cover on it. 

Viktor shrugs, watching Jayce pull on his pants, leaving his shirt untucked. “Yeah. I’m a 90’s kid.” 

“Same. I didn’t really get into them until after Kurt was long dead, though.” 

“I mean, yeah, I was young and not even living in the U.S. when he died so, same.” Jayce tilts his head curiously and Viktor shakes his head. With a smirk and a teasing tone, he says, “Anyway, get the hell out of my house.” 

Laughing and now fully dressed, Jayce says, “Alright, alright. I’ll get out of your hair. I think long hair suits you, by the way.”

“Thanks, it’s… kind of recent. I only started growing it out last year. I wanted to try something new.”

“It frames your face nicely. Fun to play with too.” Jayce smirks, casually brushing a lock of hair out of Viktor’s face. The small gesture leaves Viktor’s stomach fluttering with butterflies again and, not knowing the effect he had on him, Jayce heads out of the room. Ignoring the feeling, Viktor grabs his crutch to follow.

“Have a good rest of your night,” Jayce says once he’s got his shoes on and he’s pulling on his coat. 

“Yeah, you too.”

At that moment, Rio decides to saunter over and meow loudly up at Jayce. Looking at Viktor, he asks, “Can I pet her?”

“Sure. She’s pretty picky about people but she might be into it. It’s really a roll of the dice.”

Crouching, Jayce holds out his hand for her to sniff. “Hey, kitty. It was nice meeting you.” Rio meows again, sniffing his hand before butting her head against it. With a grin, Jayce pets her head to her tail and she begins to purr so loud it’s comical. “Is she always this loud?”

“Yes. You should hear her snore. I sometimes get startled because it sounds like there’s a grown man in my house,” Viktor says, chuckling. “It seems like she likes you.”

“Well, I like her. I love animals but I’m too busy for one.” Standing, Jayce moves to open the door but Rio starts rubbing against his legs.

“Pojď, prdelička, horký muž se snaží odejít,” Viktor coos playfully at her before picking her up with one arm and holding her to his chest. “Anyways, get home safe.”

“Yeah, thanks. Maybe I’ll see you around sometime,” Jayce says before winking at Viktor.

“Maybe,” Viktor says coyly then watches Jayce leave without another word.

Would I see him again? Maybe. I probably won’t if I haven’t seen him at the bar before now, though.

Viktor goes to bed more than satisfied. In his dreams, he’s making out with Jayce again on a bed of tulips and it gives him a warm, fuzzy feeling when he wakes up in the morning.

I’ll probably never forget him, Viktor thinks to himself when he wakes up alone. Despite the pleasant tingling in his chest, there’s a hollowness behind it that he forces himself to ignore.

 Friday, October 4th, 2019

It’s another Friday night and Viktor’s at the bar again, a week after his last hookup. He does his usual thing, sitting at the bar in tan pants and a loose burgundy sweater, sipping his glass of whiskey. After about a half-hour, he sees a man across the bar—tall, handsome, dark hair and a strong nose. He catches the man’s gaze briefly before, next to him, a familiar voice says, “Is this seat taken?”

Viktor turns to see Jayce, moving to sit on the stool next to Viktor, wearing a charming smile. He has clearly come from the office because he’s dressed in an emerald green dress shirt, untucked into black slacks, that he looks incredibly handsome in. His hazel eyes behind his glasses shine beautifully in the dim light, and Viktor’s stomach twists in… excitement? That’s an unfamiliar reaction. Whenever he’s seen past hookups again, it’s usually a ‘been there, done that’ kind of response. He’s actually glad to see Jayce. Maybe he shouldn’t be surprised by that because Jayce fucked him so good he thought about it all week.

Viktor notices that the expensive watch is gone. So he took one piece of advice.

“Not at all,” Viktor says with amusement, turning his full body toward the man, quickly forgetting about the stranger across the bar who he was trying to make eyes at. “Funny seeing you here again.”

“Same to you. Are you usually here on Friday nights?” Jayce waves two fingers in Vander’s direction to get a drink.

“I’m a creature of habit, so yes.”

“I’ll have what he’s having,” Jayce nods to Viktor when Vander shows up. 

“Didn’t peg you for a whiskey man, Jayce,” Vander replies, clearly familiar with him. The bartender and owner of The Last Drop likes to get to know the regulars, so Viktor can’t help but wonder why he hasn’t run into Jayce before.

“Trying something new,” Jayce shrugs. Vander quickly sets the whiskey on the rocks in front of Jayce then goes to take another order.

“Do you usually come on a different day of the week?” Viktor asks, raising a brow at Jayce in question.

“Yeah, I used to come on Saturdays but my boss told me I need to stop working on Saturdays… so, Fridays it is.” Viktor hums, his curiosity piqued but not enough to dig further. Jayce takes a sip of the whiskey, savouring the taste on his tongue like he’s a goddamn sommelier. “Not bad. Whiskey’s not my favourite but I appreciate the caramel notes of this one.” 

“I thought you might’ve been an exclusively beer kind of guy,” Viktor comments.

“I drink beer when I’m at a bar, just because it’s cheap and it doesn’t get me too drunk. I’m usually a wine kind of guy, actually.”

“Red or white?” 

“Typically red, but I’ll drink white if it pairs well with what I’m eating.” 

“I usually go for white, but I’ll drink red if that’s what’s there. I’m not picky about wine.”

“I took a sommelier class for fun so let’s just say I’m a bit of…”

Ah-ha. I read him correctly.

“A snob?” Viktor chuckles, sipping his own drink. “Nothing wrong with that. I’m particular about my whiskey.” 

“I thought you hated small talk,” Jayce says, smirking slightly at him.

“So far you haven’t asked me about the weather or what I do for a living, so I don’t consider this small talk. Simply chatting. How’s your hunt going tonight?”

Giving him a coy look, Jayce chuckles softly. “Who said I was on the hunt?”

“I can only assume you came over to me because you were wondering if I would hook up again.” Viktor gives the other man a pointed look, as if to say you’re not slick.

“What can I say? You’re hot and hooking up was a lot of fun.”

Humming in acknowledgment, Viktor sips his whiskey again, raising an eyebrow at Jayce. “Give me one good reason to hook up with you a second time.”

Leaning closer, close enough that Viktor can see the pigmented rings of Jayce’s hazel irises, the other man murmurs, “Pretty sure I made you cry with my mouth and fingers alone last Friday.” 

The very vivid memory comes to mind and, yes, that was the best orgasm he’s had in a long time. Jayce ate him out and fingered him like it was a sport and he’s a gold medalist. However, Viktor can’t remember the last time he hooked up with someone more than once—probably when he had a fuck buddy in university. Charlie was pretty good in bed but Jayce put him to shame. 

It could have been a fluke. Maybe I should let Jayce in my bed again as an experiment to test my theory that it was a one-off. “I will admit, that’s a pretty good argument.”

“I think that we can agree that going another round would be mutually beneficial,” Jayce says, a smug grin on his bearded face. 

Viktor scoffs with amusement then says, “Fine. Consider me convinced. You want to get out of here after this drink?” 

“Oh, absolutely.” In seconds, Jayce knocks back the tumbler of whiskey before grinning at him again. The smile alone makes his insides twist with anticipation. He’s a charmer, for sure. 

Viktor follows his example, but he barely has half an ounce left. “Will you get me my coat?”

Taking Viktor’s hand in his, Jayce brings his lips to his knuckle. “Happily.” 

Rolling his eyes, Viktor pulls his hand back and gets the coat tag out of his pants pocket. Holding it out, Viktor says, “Here you go, Prince Charming.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment even though I’m pretty sure I heard a hint of disdain in your voice,” Jayce teases, taking the tag.

Shamelessly, Viktor watches Jayce walk away, admiring his rippling shoulders in his fitted dress shirt. He also gets a good view of Jayce’s ass and the man gives the Statue of David a run for its money. Just like last time, Viktor prepares the Uber and Jayce is back in under two minutes. 

During the ride there, Viktor casually slides a hand into Jayce’s lap, following the inseam of his trousers. His fingers climb higher, tracing the outline of Jayce’s cock, earning a quiet gasp in response. Viktor continues to tease him, feeling him starting to get hard, until they’re back at Viktor’s place in ten minutes. 

Viktor barely gets the door open before Jayce scoops him into a kiss, kicking the door closed behind him after he drags Viktor inside. He drops his crutch to hold on to Jayce’s shoulders, pushing his stupid, expensive overcoat off and to the floor. Clumsily, Viktor toes off his shoes while they kiss, and Jayce groans into his mouth. Shrugging off his jacket, Viktor’s arms return to Jayce’s neck and he says, “Pick me up.”

Taking in a deep breath to recover, Jayce nods. “Let me get my shoes first.” Impatiently, Viktor waits for Jayce to untie his laces, placing a hand on his back while he’s bent over to keep steady without his crutch. Moments later, Jayce is picking Viktor up by grabbing the backs of his legs. Viktor attacks his mouth again, keeping his arms looped around his neck while Jayce holds him flush to his body.

Rio meows loudly at Jayce’s feet and Viktor snorts in the middle of the kiss. Pulling away, he smacks his hand over his nose and then says, “Sorry, that was probably the least sexy sound I could have made…”

“Nah, I thought it was cute,” Jayce grins, looking down at the cat. “Hi, Rio. How are you?” 

She meows loudly and Viktor laughs. “Talkative as always. She’ll be fine, I’ll give her attention after we’re done. Now come on, carry me to bed.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Být dobrý, prdelička,” Viktor says before kissing Jayce again while he blindly carries Viktor to his room. Burying his hands in Jayce’s hair, Viktor dips his tongue in his mouth, earning a groan in response. Surprisingly, Jayce remembers where it is and only bumps into the door once. 

Lying Viktor down on the bed, Jayce doesn’t break the kiss by following him down, climbing between his legs. His hands tuck under Viktor’s sweater, hiking it up as he runs them over Viktor’s stomach. Reaching for Jayce’s dress shirt, Viktor starts unbuttoning it in a rush.

It doesn’t take long for them to get undressed. Viktor keeps his braces on so he can ride Jayce, and he’s pretty sure he’s going to have bruises on his hips from how tightly Jayce holds on to him. When he gets tired, Jayce flips their positions so he can plow Viktor into the mattress, which is how he determines that last time was not a fluke. Jayce is that good in bed and the orgasm he has from his cock alone is earth-shattering. It’s been a long time since someone made him have a cervical orgasm, but his toes curl and he cries in ecstasy when he comes. He’s used like a cocksleeve until Jayce spills inside the condom, at his own demand, and Viktor feels satisfied when Jayce falls into his bed next to him. 

“You’re pretty good,” Viktor says as he catches his breath. 

Jayce laughs, panting from exhaustion. “Pretty good? Think I’m more than pretty good if you’re crying my name when you come.”

“Alright, don’t get a big head about it,” he scoffs, resting his arm over his face, blocking his sight. 

“If you’re down for another round, I’d love to eat you out again.”

“Jesus… okay, give me like, five minutes.” 

So they go again. As promised, Jayce eats him out until his whole body is spasming in pleasure. Viktor follows it up by giving Jayce a blowjob (with a condom between them), and he likes it when Jayce pulls on his hair. He knows how to do it properly and isn’t just yanking, which Viktor has experienced before. 

When they’re done, Jayce seems reluctant to leave, which Viktor almost feels too, but he’s tired and wants to give Rio some attention before he passes out. “This was fun,” Viktor says casually as he pulls on a previously worn t-shirt from the floor. Meanwhile, Jayce is getting his slacks and dress shirt back on and grins at him.

“Yeah, you’re good in bed, by the way. Forgot to tell you that.”

“You don’t need to, I know,” Viktor says with a smirk. 

Jayce gets Viktor’s crutch from where they left it by the front door before Viktor walks him to the door. It’s already 2:30 am and usually his hookups don’t last this long, but he also doesn’t usually go two rounds. 

“Thanks for the orgasms, have a safe trip home,” Viktor says as Jayce gets his shoes on and collects his coat from the floor. 

“Same to you. Maybe I’ll see you at The Last Drop again,” Jayce replies with a grin, which Viktor reads as code for let’s do this again sometime. 

“Yeah, maybe.” Viktor is trying to be nonchalant because he’s not the type to hook up with the same person twice, let alone three times. He won’t lie and say he isn’t tempted, though. 

“Goodnight, Viktor.” 

“Goodnight, Jayce.” 

With that, Jayce leaves and Viktor sighs with relief that he’s finally alone. Rio comes meowing at his feet again now that Jayce has left. “Ano, moje prdelička,” he coos, bending over to scratch under her chin. “Come on, let’s go cuddle on the couch. I have TV to catch up on.”

While Viktor sinks into the couch under a blanket with Rio in his lap, he tries not to think about how his back and hips are sore from Jayce fucking him so good. He wonders in passing if he should just give Jayce his number so they can just hook up casually, but Viktor has been reluctant to try the whole fuck buddies thing again. Last time ended in a disaster after Charlie fell in love with him.

That probably wouldn’t happen again though, right?

Friday, October 11th, 2019

Viktor has known Powder for a long time. There’s a six-year age gap, but he has known her since she was twelve. 

After his mom died when he was eighteen, he went through an alcohol-dependent depression. All he had left was a year's worth of his mom’s salary from her life insurance and whatever the government gave him for his disability. He should have been using it to pay for his next year of university and living costs, but he was legally an adult then so he started drinking it away. There was no plan. At his darkest moments, he hoped he’d drink himself to death. It felt a little funny to be taking a page out of his dad’s book.

Vander stepped in after watching him come into The Last Drop, already drunk, every night for three months and cutting him off every time. Viktor was utterly lost. He had been dodging Sky’s calls since the funeral and when she showed up at his apartment, he refused to let her in. She would try calling several times a day, then it dwindled away to only once a week.

After fighting him before going cold turkey, Vander got him sober and gave him a job mixing drinks to support himself. It was ironic for a recovering short-term alcoholic to be surrounded by alcohol all the time, but it actually helped. Exposure therapy, Viktor theorizes. Stare the thing that holds power over you in the face for eight hours a day and you’ll stop feeling the fear. After a month of being sober, he picked up Sky’s call. She cried and he could hear her then-boyfriend, now-husband, Jax consoling her in the background. He wept like a baby and apologized for being so distant and confessed everything to her. 

The longer Viktor worked at The Last Drop, the closer he got to Vander and his family. In the hours before open, Viktor would have meals with Vander, Silco, Vi and Powder. Vander and Silco even trusted him after a year to keep the girls out of trouble, especially since Vi was getting rebellious at fifteen and she seemed to listen to Viktor more than her adopted parents. He played video games and board games with them, got them into fantasy novels and comic books, and they became like the family he never had, after Sky that is. While he and Vi weren’t as close, Powder was practically his shadow whenever he was around.

Viktor got his first bioengineering job when he finished his Bachelor’s at twenty-one. He would see them less but he still had dinner with them once a week. At twenty-two is when he had his first drink in four years. Vander served it to him and he only had one. He was proud of himself for coming so far. That’s when going to The Last Drop on Friday nights became a ritual. He’d say hi to Vander, Silco and the girls, stay for one drink, then head home. Then… well, he started to get hit on. Other than a casual fuck buddy in university, Viktor had very limited experience, but eventually picking up strangers became part of his routine too.

When he was finishing his PhD thesis at twenty-four, Powder told him she was going to Zaun U for bioengineering so she could follow in his footsteps. He was so proud and excited too, because he had been offered a spot in the University’s bioengineering research team while he finished his doctorate. With both of them spending the majority of their time at the University, they could get lunch and hang out regularly.

While Viktor isn’t a fan of favouritism, when he became a team lead at twenty-nine and Powder was finishing her Master’s, he recommended her for a research assistant position. She got it of her own merit, Viktor wasn’t involved in the hiring process at all, he just made a glowing referral. 

It’s Powder’s twenty-sixth birthday and he’s invited, along with Powder’s friends, all in their twenties. Just like usual, he’s at The Last Drop on a Friday night, but he’s seated at one of four tables pushed together for everyone to fit. Sky was supposed to be here, but she had to go to Boston for some four-day-long conference. He feels a bit like a fish out of water, being the oldest in the group, but he’s there for Powder.  

Most of the guests got the memo about the colour scheme. He’s next to Vi, now sporting shorter pink hair compared to how in her face it was in her early twenties, and wearing a dark blue button-up under a silver-grey denim vest. She’s next to Powder, who recently cut her hair to the nape of her neck and wearing a short dark blue halter dress with silver trim. Then, on the other side of Powder is Ekko, a young black man with platinum blonde locs tied in a ponytail, wearing a navy dress shirt with a silver tie. Viktor hasn’t met Ekko before, but he’s Powder’s boyfriend who she can’t stop talking about. That’s the extent of who he knows and the names he can retain. Everyone else at the tables just becomes a blur.

Vander serves everyone drinks and Viktor catches up with Vi, who has spent the last three years building up her career as a musician. She went through a troubling phase where she ended up in juvie when hanging with the wrong crowd. At twenty-one she ended up in prison because of a bar fight where she defended herself, which she had to contest in court for over three years. It was a really stressful time for her sister and their parents. But Vi was exonerated eventually and they’re all happy to have her on the outside again. 

As the night goes on, Ekko ends up next to Viktor and he says, “Hey, you’re Viktor, right? Powder’s boss?”

Viktor smirks, huffing with amusement. “Is that what she told you?”

“Uh, yeah, are you not?”

“Boss and I guess you could say pseudo-brother. I’ve known her for fourteen years,” Viktor explains, taking a sip of his whiskey. “She’s spoken very highly of you, Ekko. It’s nice to finally put a name to a face.” 

“Oh, yeah? I’m curious what she’s said.”

“She talks about you a lot so I know that you’re originally from New Orleans, you like longboarding, and you’re a ‘super genius’ chemical engineer, among other things. You just finished your Master’s, right?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t as lucky as Pow to have a job lined up right away. I did an internship for the last six months but it didn’t lead anywhere.”

“I’ll keep my eyes out for any positions in your field. I have some connections across the industry.”

“That’d be awesome, thanks,” Ekko says, giving him a bright and genuine smile. The guy is charming, he can see why Powder is so smitten. 

“How did you two meet, by the way?”

“She was a year above me but we both ended up being TAs for the same technical engineering professor. We didn’t start dating until after she graduated to avoid any, uh, complications.”

“Smart,” Viktor nods, his eyes drifting over to the bar for a brief moment. That’s when he notices he’s being stared at. By Jayce.

The man he’s hooked up with twice now is sitting at the bar wearing something a little more casual than typical. He’s in dark jeans and a raspberry crewneck sweater, a subtle smile on his lips when he sees Viktor has noticed him. He actually thinks Jayce looks very handsome when he’s laid back—then again, a man like that usually looks handsome in most things. Jayce nods at him and sips his beer, and Viktor can’t help but be tempted. 

Would I actually hook up with him a third time in a row?

“I, uh… see my friend over there, so I’m going to go say hi,” Viktor quickly lies when he looks back at Ekko, though he’s not sure how convincing it is. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Ekko.”

“Yeah, you too,” Ekko returns, lifting his beer to gesture a cheer.

Finishing the last sip of his drink, he leaves his glass on the table, grabs his crutch, and makes his way over to Jayce. “Well, what a coincidence seeing you here,” Viktor greets him with a teasing tone. He’s willing to bet Jayce just showed up to try and hook up with him again.

“I didn’t mean to distract you from your friends. I just couldn’t help but stare because you look so beautiful tonight,” Jayce says charmingly, nodding to his navy dress shirt with a subtle silver star pattern on it. It was a birthday gift from Sky—it’s her signature to buy things with astral bodies on them.

“Well, you’ve distracted me anyway. So, can I help you?”

“Can I buy you a drink?” The handsome smile Jayce gives him makes his stomach tighten with want. He’s pretty much already decided that, if Jayce wants to, Viktor’s taking him home again. All he had to do was smile at me. It was that easy.

“No, you’ve already bought me a drink, so let me buy you one. Are you done with that?” Viktor nods to his beer.

Jayce tips back the bottle, finishing the rest of it. “Now I am.”

Climbing up onto the stool next to Jayce, he waves Vander down and the man walks over to them not a minute later.

“Abandoning the party, Viktor?” Vander asks, though his eyes linger on Jayce for a moment. 

“I might. You know parties aren’t really my thing,” he says, knowing Vander is going to ask him what’s going on with him and Jayce at a later time. The answer is, of course, nothing. “My usual. Jayce?”

“My usual too. Thanks, Vander,” Jayce follows up, turning toward Viktor when Vander walks away. “What’s the party for?”

“My friend’s birthday. She just turned twenty-six. At almost thirty-two it’s a little weird to be surrounded by people in their mid-twenties.”

“Hey, you just told me something about yourself voluntarily,” Jayce grins, like he’s caught Viktor in a trap. Vander swings by with their drinks and Viktor slips him a bill including a nice tip. 

“I suppose I did.” Viktor tries not to let his slip-up bother him.

“I’m also thirty-one, actually.” 

“Hm. No offence, but I thought you were older. The beard and glasses mature you. Not in a bad way, it gives you a dilf vibe that I like.”

“No offence taken. The beard is actually relatively new. I was questioning it but you may have just convinced me to keep it.” 

“Good. I love the feeling of facial hair against my thighs,” Viktor says casually, smirking as he sips his whiskey. 

Jayce laughs though Viktor can see a slight flush on his cheeks. In his thirties, he’s been between my thighs twice now and he gets flustered when I bring it up? Cute. 

“I’m not a dilf, by the way. No kids.”

“I wouldn’t care if you did have kids. As long as I don’t see a wedding ring or some other evidence that you’re taken, anything’s fine by me. I don’t want to be caught being someone’s mistress or something,” Viktor says while raising a brow and taking a drink.

“Oh my ‘mistress’, huh? Are we familiar enough for you to claim such a title?”

“Maybe not yet. Two times is a coincidence. But, three times is a pattern.” 

“So a third time is on the table, is it?”

“I’m considering it.” That’s a lie. Viktor already wants Jayce to come home with him and pound him into the mattress again. “Interested?”

“I’m going to have to think about it,” Jayce teases before taking a long sip of his beer. When he puts it down, Jayce says with an exaggerated nod, “Yes, absolutely.”

“Then let's get out of here.” Viktor starts downing his whiskey, eager to leave.

Following suit, Jayce chugs his beer before asking, “Could I get you your coat?”

“I would appreciate it.” Pulling the tag from his pocket, Viktor holds it out to Jayce who takes it and heads to the coat check.

He starts preparing the Uber on his phone and apparently, Powder notices him at the bar and breaks away from a conversation with her friends to come speak to him. “Hey, what are you doing over here? Not having fun?” 

“That’s not the reason. I… eh…” Viktor cringes, before sighing. “Okay, I’ll be blunt, I’m taking someone back to my place.”

Powder’s eyes bug out. “I saw you like ten minutes ago talking to Ekko! How the hell did you already bag a hookup?”

“Uh… it’s not what it looks like?”

Squinting her eyes suspiciously at Viktor, she says, “Okay, so if it isn’t you miraculously getting a hookup in minutes at my birthday party, what is it?”

“He’s… um… an old hookup,” Viktor says embarrassingly. Powder knows Viktor is not a relationship person and doesn’t see people more than once, so the incredulous look she gives him is understandable.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, this will be the… third time I’m hooking up with him.”

Whispering scandalously, Powder says, “Whoaaa, do you have a boyfriend?”

“He is not my boyfriend, he’s just—” Viktor cuts himself off when he sees Jayce approach, wearing a black leather jacket instead of his usual overcoat. He looks rather… dashing in that, Viktor has to admit to himself. 

“Hey, here’s your jacket,” Jayce says as he holds out his corduroy jacket as he eyes Powder. “Am I interrupting?”

“Kind of, can you just, uh… wait for me by the doors?” Viktor takes his jacket and chews on his bottom lip because Powder is not going to let this one go.

“Sure, I can get the Uber ready this time.” 

“You remember my—?”

“Yeah. I’ll see you in a few?”

“Yeah,” Viktor nods and watches Jayce walk away… and he has to pry his eyes away from Jayce’s ass to look back at Powder. She’s watching after Jayce too with her mouth agape before turning back to Viktor.

“Oh my god. Vik. He’s hot,” Powder says incredulously. “How did you pull that man? Not that I don’t think you can, he just might be the hottest guy I’ve seen you with.”

Viktor smiles, a little proud if he’s being honest. “He hit on me first. Three weeks ago. This will be the, uh, third Friday in a row I’m hooking up with him.”

“Okay, that’s basically a boyfriend in your books. Who is this nerdy hunk?”

“‘Nerdy hunk’?” Viktor raises a single brow, giving Powder an unimpressed look.

“Uh, yeah? He’s buff and he’s got nerd glasses.” She raises a brow back, acting like it’s obvious. 

“I’m not telling you who he is because I don’t know who he is. We agreed to remain strangers. So, he’s not my boyfriend, nor will he ever be.”

“What? Why would you not want to lock him down?” 

“Just because he’s hot doesn’t mean he would be a good fit for me. And I’ve told you a dozen times already, I’m not interested in a relationship,” Viktor says with a shrug. “He’s good in bed and that’s all I care about.” 

Powder sighs dramatically, leaning against the bar. “I think you’re insane.”

“I acknowledge your opinion but I don’t care,” Viktor says, slipping on his jacket and standing, grabbing his crutch in the process. “Happy birthday, Powder. I will see you on Monday.”

“Thanks, Vik. Have fun with the nerdy hunk!”

Viktor huffs out a laugh before turning to leave. He spots Jayce standing near the door, his hazel eyes already fixated on him from across the room. Jayce sees that Viktor has noticed and his eyes flicker away, like he’s pretending he wasn’t just watching him like a hawk. When he approaches Jayce moments later, he has a teasing grin on his face. “Were you watching me that whole time?”

“Uh… no?”

Viktor hums, cupping Jayce’s bearded chin and jaw casually. Instinctively, Jayce leans into the touch. “You look like an excited puppy.”

“What can I say? You’re beautiful and I like fucking you.”

“You’re sweet,” Viktor smirks slightly as he pulls away, nodding down to Jayce’s phone in his hand. “Did you order the Uber?”

“Oh, right, I’ll do that now,” Jayce says with a giddy energy.

Normally Viktor wouldn’t do such a thing but, he’s had a few drinks and it gives him the inhibition to make out with Jayce in the back of the car. He was right when he first guessed that Jayce would be a good kisser—eager, careful of his teeth, and even playful. Jayce’s hand stays buried in his hair while he caresses the man’s jaw, enjoying the feeling of his beard against his skin. He loves a nice beard and it’s probably one of the things that attracted him to Jayce in the first place. That and the gorgeous hazel eyes.

“Make sure you tip him well,” Viktor laughs when they walk up his driveway.

“Tipsy and horny tax?” Jayce smiles in amusement and in the corner of his eye, Viktor sees Jayce give the man a twenty-dollar tip before putting his phone away. Okay, he’s not just generous at the bar.

Jayce is a little more patient than last time, allowing Viktor the chance to open the door and take off his coat before he’s on him again. Feeling him up from behind, Jayce kisses his neck, making Viktor shiver and lean back into his touch. One hand is on his chest while the other is wandering under his shirt and over his stomach. 

Resting his chin on Viktor’s shoulder, Jayce quietly says, “I thought I’d ask again… would it be okay if I marked you up this time?” 

Viktor actually considers it. He likes getting hickeys and bruises, he just hates being marked by someone who is nothing to him. It feels too intimate. Jayce, however, means… something. There’s obviously great chemistry since they keep being drawn back to one another, and Viktor wouldn’t mind hooking up with Jayce again after this. So, he says, “Sure. Just below the collar.”

“Does that include your thighs?”

“I said below the collar, didn’t I?” Viktor kicks off his shoes and sees that Jayce has already toed off his own. “Are you just going to feel me up or are you actually going to fuck me?”

“Oh, I plan on doing more than that.” Retracting his hands, Jayce instead scoops Viktor up and catches him by surprise, prompting him to drop his crutch. 

“Ty grátzl,” Viktor grumbles, holding onto Jayce’s neck while the man carries him bridal-style to the bedroom. “You could have warned me.” 

“I’ll warn you next time,” Jayce says with an amused chuckle. “How d’you want it tonight?” 

Viktor hums in thought while Jayce carries him to his bedroom. “I hope you’re not bored of missionary because I want to keep making out with you.”

“Not at all, I love missionary. It’s a classic for a reason.”

Jayce is so gentle when he sets Viktor down on the bed. He strips himself of his sweater and jeans before taking his time to undress Viktor. Those steady hands treat him so tenderly that it hurts. He doesn’t expect Jayce to take him apart with such care and intimacy, like they aren’t strangers and they have something more. It’s nice to pretend.

Viktor ends up coming three times that night. Twice from his vibrator, while Jayce was fucking him, and another time from behind, just from Jayce’s cock. He’s so sated he dozes off until Jayce nudges him and says “Hey, I’m gonna head home.”

“Mm, have a safe trip,” Viktor murmurs before falling back asleep. He could have sworn he felt a kiss pressed to his forehead but… he writes it off as a dream the next day. 

When he wakes up he feels achy and exhausted, but it was worth it. He checks his phone and, of course, he has texts from Powder. 

Pow 🦋
u better tell me ALLLL about nerdy hunk 
when ur not totally wrecked that is 👀

Viktor rolls his eyes. It’s very little-sister-like for her to pry into his love life but there’s no love life to pry into.

Vik 🐐
There’s nothing to tell. 
And if there was, I wouldn’t tell you. 

Pow 🦋
oh cmon!!! 
it’s my birthday week!!!!
pls pls pls pls!!!

Vik 🐐
You know birthdays mean nothing to me.

Friday, November 22nd, 2019

It’s been two months since he started hooking up with Jayce. Every Friday, they ‘coincidentally’ end up at The Last Drop at the same time—which, at some point, they started synchronizing to arrive by nine. 

Viktor will not be making it for nine tonight, though. 

At exactly 4:39 pm on Friday afternoon, the Head Researcher called Viktor into her office and told him that the dean is proposing to the key investors that their project be shut down indefinitely in favour of an offer of sponsorship from the U.S. military. Viktor is outraged. Their prosthesis connector project has the potential to be revolutionary and they were just in the process of developing their first neuro device. It would be hundreds of thousands of funding for research and development flushed down the drain if they shut it down. Viktor says all of that and his boss tells him that if he wants to save it, he’s going to have to put together a counterproposal to keep it.

“Hey, what’s up, boss?” Powder greets, packing her bag at her desk, when he enters the lab again at 4:56 pm. It seems that the rest of the research team have headed out for the weekend already.

“They’re shutting us down,” Viktor says tersely, heading to his office.

“Wait, what the fuck?” Powder drops her things and follows him into his office. “What do you mean they’re shutting us down?”

“The fucking military flashed some money in front of the new dean and now he wants us to stop everything we’re doing and work on whatever they want,” Viktor seethes, sitting down at his desk and opening his laptop with clear frustration. Putting on his reading glasses, he mutters, “Zasranej debil lízající boty. Milovník prasat.”

“I’m translating that into ‘fuck the dean and the pigs’.”

“Close enough.”

Sitting down in the chair in front of Viktor, Powder says, “What’s the plan? How we gonna get our project back?”

“We?” Viktor raises a brow, eyes flickering between her and the screen as he starts to hunt down all the relevant data he could possibly use to make his case.

“Yeah, I’m your trusty sidekick! I ain’t leavin’ until we got a game plan.” 

“We could be here a while. The only way to fight this is by stitching together a counterproposal to keep the project,” Viktor sighs heavily. “I believe in what we’re doing and I think we would put Zaun U ahead in the academia research field.”

“We should mention that we already know MIT is working on a similar project.”

“That might be why they want to shut it down—they’re worried we can’t compete with MIT.”

“Yes, but MIT’s project is an implant when ours is noninvasive. I think that’s worth highlighting because they wanna see dollar signs. Something that doesn’t require surgery is more accessible and more marketable. Even an idiot can see that.”

Viktor frowns. “I hate to view our work as a product to sell but, you’re right, they could make a lot of money selling off the technology.”

“Now we just have to see if they love money or pork more,” Powder says as she does finger guns at him.

“Yeah, well we’re up against piggy banks, not sausages.”

“Right… fuck.”

“Fuck is right.”

It might be hopeless in the end, but Viktor puts all he’s got into saving their project. Together, they build a thorough proposal with all the data, progress, and budgetary information to show why they should keep developing their prosthesis connector. 

He glances at the clock long after it’s dark and sees it's 9 pm. They’re almost done, but there’s also still so much to do. I wonder if Jayce is already at The Last Drop. Viktor continues to wonder for the next hour and a half while they finish. When it’s finally in a place where all he has to do is proofread it, Viktor lets out a sigh of relief. “Alright. I’ll finish this on the weekend. I’ve got to get the fuck out of here.” 

“Uh oh, did work make you late for something?”

“Sort of?”

Powder scrutinizes him for a moment with pursed lips before her eyes light up and she gasps. “You’re going to see nerdy hunk again, aren’t you?”

“No comment,” Viktor says, packing up his laptop.

“He’s sooooo your boyfriend,” Powder cackles as she packs up her own stuff.

“He is sooo not,” Viktor mimics her sarcastically, throwing on his green peacoat and shouldering his bag quickly. “Anyway, thank you for all your help.”

“Anytime, bro,” she says with a salute. 

“Have a good weekend, Powder.” 

Grabbing his crutch, he leaves the building as fast as he can. When he reaches his car, he tosses his laptop bag in the back haphazardly and immediately heads to the Lanes. Usually he would drive home and get an Uber to the bar, but he’ll just have to get his car tomorrow. He tries to be as patient as he can while he’s driving, but it’s like every possible stop light is red when he reaches it. The clock on the display of his Prius reads 11:05 pm. He’s already two hours late. It’s his hope that Jayce didn’t just go home already or, worse, he hooked up with someone else. 

Why is that the worst-case scenario? Am I really addicted to him to the point where I don’t want to share?

Before going in, he briefly looks in his rearview mirror and takes his hair tie out of his hair, making sure it looks neat but not too neat down. He realizes he’s still wearing his reading glasses, but he can’t go home without them, so for once he wears them to the bar. When he enters The Last Drop after ten minutes of fussing, Viktor doesn’t even bother with the coat check and heads straight to the bar where he sees Silco tending it. Shrugging off his coat and sitting on the bar seat he says, “Hey Sil, can I get my usual?”

“Surprised to see you arriving so late,” the older man comments, already in the process of scooping ice from the freezer drawer below the bar.

“Yeah, there’s a fucking shitstorm at work. They’re trying to shut mine and Pow’s project down.”

That gets Silco’s attention because Powder has always been a daddy’s girl and Viktor is pretty sure Silco would literally kill for her. His brows are pinched with pending anger as he pours Viktor’s whiskey. “They’re doing what?”

“Yeah, our prosthesis project we’ve been working on for two years? They’re trying to shelf it for some military project.”

Silco scoffs with disdain. “Greedy assholes, if you ask me,” he says before sliding Viktor’s drink toward him.

“Yeah, no kidding. By the way, have you seen Jayce?” Viktor asks, trying to seem casual while sliding a bill across the bar.

“Who? Your boyfriend?” Silco quirks a brow with that familiar half-smirk of amusement he frequently has. 

“Not my boyfriend, just a reprieve for my final thread of sanity,” Viktor says with a glare, taking a sip of his drink. “You didn’t answer me.”

“I believe he’s over at table six. I do have to warn you, he’s not alone.” 

Pausing with his glass at his lips, he lowers it slowly and stares at Silco with barely veiled displeasure. “What do you mean he’s not alone?”

“Well, he was sitting at the bar for over an hour then another man started flirting with him.” Silco gives him a knowing look, clearly challenging this ‘not-my-boyfriend’ mentality. Maybe meeting up with Jayce continuously at The Last Drop was a bad idea.

“Thank you for letting me know,” Viktor says before knocking back his drink and handing the empty glass over to Silco. 

“Good luck.” 

“I don’t need it.” 

Viktor knows the table numbers like the back of his hand because they haven’t changed since he stopped working at the bar a decade ago. Table six is one tucked in a corner, a booth big enough for four. When he approaches, he sees the back of Jayce’s head, which he’s familiar enough with now to pick out in a crowd. Across from him is sitting some twink with short, shaggy brown hair and big doe eyes. He looks like he’s hanging off of every word Jayce is saying.

“So, what do you do for a living?” He overhears the man say in a voice dripping with sweet honey.

“Oh, I’m a bio—”

“Jayce, is that you?” Viktor interrupts, approaching the table and placing a hand casually on Jayce’s shoulder. 

Jayce nearly jumps, looking up at Viktor with wide hazel eyes. There’s an expression on his face that Viktor can’t quite read, but a small quirk of his lips says he’s happy to see him. “Oh, uh, hey Viktor! I didn't think you were coming out tonight.”

“Mm, got caught up at work so I didn’t get here until ten minutes ago. Could I sit with you?” Viktor is boring his gaze into the stranger’s now, challenging him. He hopes that he gets the message of ‘this is my territory, so fuck off’.

“Of course!” Jayce is eager to answer before the other man can, scooting over in the booth for Viktor to sit down. 

Sitting next to Jayce, close enough that their thighs and arms are touching, he folds his coat in his lap. Viktor stares down the other man, daring him to say something. “Who’s your friend?” 

“Tommy,” the man says curtly, clearly trying to pretend to be nice. “How do you two know each other?”

“Uh, well…” Jayce trails off and Viktor doesn’t wait for him to come up with a lie.

“We have sex. Often.”

Jayce chokes and coughs, clearly not expecting Viktor to be so honest. 

“Oh. No offence, but how did you manage to hook up with him?” Tommy asks.

Oh, I’m ready to take this pretty boy down a notch. 

Before Viktor can speak, Jayce cuts in and asks with clear offence, “What the fuck does that mean?”

It’s sweet for Jayce to get defensive in his honour, but Viktor doesn’t need it. “I can handle this, Jayce,” Viktor begins, smiling condescendingly at Tommy. “You see, not all of us have to rely on our big brown eyes for all of our sex appeal. I know you’re conventionally good looking and all you have to do is bat your eyelashes when you’re trying to bed someone, but some of us actually know how to pull a man without needing to be on an arbitrary attractiveness scale.”

“I get that looks are not everything but… what do you even have to offer?” Tommy looks him up and down and his eyes clearly land on Viktor’s crutch leaning against the booth.

There’s a beat of silence before Viktor barks out a laugh. “Oh, so you’re stooping as low as hinting at my disability? Like that can stop me from having good sex?” Viktor mocks before turning to Jayce. “Jayce, what do you think I have to offer?”

Jayce is glowering at Tommy, clearly more on edge on Viktor’s behalf than he is. “Great body, pretty face, a sharp tongue, and not to mention, impeccable head.” 

Viktor is actually flattered. He’s never heard ‘pretty face’ and ‘impeccable head’ before, but they’re appreciated compliments. Turning his head back to Tommy, he smiles again with the same sarcastic expression as before. “See? I can do a lot more with my mouth than take you down a peg.”

Tommy looks stricken like he’s trying to come to grips with the fact that he lost in the battle for Jayce’s dick for the night, even though he never stood a chance. “Whatever, you’re… you’re not worth it,” Tommy mutters before getting up and leaving. 

Satisfied with the outcome, Viktor smiles to himself and turns to Jayce. “I hope you’re not mad at me for chasing off an ableist twink.”

“No, not at all,” Jayce says with a sigh. He gives Viktor a soft, sombre smile. “The moment I saw you, I lost interest… I thought you weren’t coming out tonight.” 

“Yeah, sorry I’m late. Shit hit the fan at work and I had to scramble. I, um… I haven’t even had dinner. I came straight here.”

Furrowing his brows, Jayce frowns and asks, “Wait, when were you working until?” 

“Quarter to eleven?”

“What happened that you had to work that late on a Friday?”

Viktor groans, running a hand over his face. “Well… without going into too much detail, a project I’m very passionate about is being shut down—or, at least, my new boss is trying to shut it down. I spent the last six hours putting together a counterproposal with my assistant to save it. The asshole only had my department head tell me twenty minutes before the end of the day that a new project was being proposed on Monday, so he was obviously counting on me rolling over and accepting defeat.”

“Well, he clearly doesn’t know you very well. I don’t think you’re the type to go down easily,” Jayce says fondly, smiling at Viktor like he’s so, so happy to see him.

“Thank you, I take that as a compliment. Now, enough talk about work,” Viktor says, sliding his hand over Jayce’s thigh, his fingertips skirting along the inseam of his jeans. “I could really use some… decompressing.”

“I can certainly help with that,” Jayce murmurs, turning his body more towards him as he runs a hand through Viktor’s hair. “By the way, that was really hot.” 

“What? Telling another man to get off of my property?” Viktor bites back a grin, his eyes flickering down to Jayce’s lips. 

“Your property, huh?” Jayce raises a brow in amusement.

“For the night, at least,” he says before cupping the back of Jayce’s neck and pulling him in for a kiss. With an eager reply, Jayce holds the back of Viktor’s head while his other hand travels up his thigh. Obediently, he opens his mouth when Viktor’s tongue traces his lips. Viktor licks into his mouth, cradling Jayce’s jaw with the hand that had been traversing the inside of his thigh. 

He isn’t sure how long they’re making out in the booth—at least five minutes if not ten. But he drinks in every moment of feeling up Jayce’s body under his plain white t-shirt and soft red cardigan. When he pulls away, he immediately says, “Want to get out of here?”

“Absolutely.”

When Viktor dons his worn green peacoat, Jayce gives him a funny look. “What?”

“It’s just so weird that you’re the one dressed like you just came from the office for once,” Jayce says with amusement. 

It’s true, Viktor still has his navy pinstripe dress shirt tucked into his slacks and didn’t even take off his tie before coming. “Is the respectable office look a turn-on or a turn-off?” 

“Mm… turn on, definitely. I especially like the glasses.”

Viktor pays for the Uber this time because, in the last month, they’ve been going back and forth. When they get in the back seat, Viktor makes a decision. Holding out his hand, he says, “Give me your phone.”

With a raised brow, Jayce asks, “Why?” 

“I’m giving you my number.”

“… Oh?”

“I think we should stop relying on the bar to hook up. I’m just going to give you my number so we can meet up whenever’s convenient.”

“Oh. Alright,” Jayce agrees, appearing as though he’s trying to hide how excited he is to finally be hooking up outside of the bar. 

Quickly, Viktor texts himself from Jayce’s phone. It buzzes in his pocket and he hands it back to Jayce. “There. Now we can coordinate and not accidentally stand each other up if something comes up.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize we could stand each other up. I thought we were coincidentally bumping into each other,” Jayce grins teasingly.

Viktor rolls his eyes. “Let’s not play games. We were just going to the bar to hook up for the last month.” 

“You caught me.” Jayce has the sense to look sheepish. “So… we can agree that we like seeing each other and we no longer have to come out Friday night just to do that?”

“Yes,” Viktor says before pausing as he keeps his eyes on Jayce. “Were you actually considering hooking up with Tommy?”

“I… won’t lie and say I wasn’t. But I was procrastinating, hoping you’d still show up.” There’s a small smile on Jayce’s lips and it’s enough to make Viktor feel he was justified in being possessive.

“Good. I’m glad I caught you before you wasted your time,” Viktor smirks, earning a laugh from Jayce.

Their hook-up goes as well as it always does. They don’t waste time with much foreplay because it’s already almost midnight when they get back to Viktor’s place. Jayce doesn’t even bother undressing Viktor all the way, leaving hickeys on his collarbone and chest that were visible through his partially unbuttoned shirt. While he starts by riding Jayce, things quickly shift to Jayce doing all the work by thrusting his hips upward, all while Viktor clings to him. The sounds he makes while he’s getting fucked into oblivion are pitiful and animalistic, but it’s rare Viktor has any shame in the bedroom.

“Hey, I hope everything works out with your counterproposal,” Jayce says as he starts getting his shoes on to leave.

Viktor is only dressed in some boxers and an X-Men graphic tee as he sits on the bench by his front door, waiting for Jayce to head out. “Thanks. Honestly, I’m… pretty pessimistic about it. The new project they’re proposing comes with a huge commission from the government. I can picture the dollar signs in my boss’ eyes like a goddamn cartoon.”

Jayce furrows his brows in thought, and Viktor can tell he’s trying to guess what Viktor possibly does for a living. 

“Sounds like whatever this project is, you’re against.”

“Understatement. Let’s just say, it challenges my moral values.”

Frowning, Jayce says, “Sounds like you need a new job if things head in that direction.”

Viktor pauses, considering it. Change has always been challenging for him. He’s been on the Zaun U R&D team for almost eight years, and a team lead for the last three. Maybe he should consider a new job… however, knowing himself, he’ll probably put off looking for months. “Maybe. I’ll have to think about it. Anyway, thanks as always, for the great sex that is.”

Chuckling, Jayce says, “My pleasure. I’ll text you Monday and let you know when I’m free.”

“Okay, have a safe trip home.”

Viktor locks up as soon as Jayce is gone and goes to eat a late dinner of cup ramen. Immediately after, he gets ready to go to sleep. When he finally gets to bed and Rio joins him, his phone buzzes on his bedside table. 

Opening the texts from the unknown number, clearly Jayce’s, he sees his own text from earlier and a couple of new ones.

Unknown 11:40 PM
Jayce’s number.

Unknown 02:36 AM
made it home safely
i had a great time tonite
looking forward to next time 😘

Rather than replying, he just reacts to the message with a thumbs up. While he gave Jayce his number, that doesn’t mean he’s going to entertain text conversations outside of hooking up.

Friday, December 6th, 2019

It’s another night of hooking up at Viktor’s place. Since a couple of weeks ago when they exchanged numbers, Jayce has been coming over, of which he did twice each week. The sex is amazing, as it always is. They just have a natural chemistry that leads to great orgasms and just as good pillow talk. Viktor doesn’t think he’s had so much sexual satisfaction or… fun with a hookup before, and it just continues to get better.

“Okay, if you’re stranded on an island and you could only bring one thing, what would it be?” Jayce grins, watching Viktor from where he’s lying in bed next to him.

“Well, that depends… if it’s an electronic, can I take some sort of solar charger?” Viktor cocks a brow, smiling with amusement. “If so, I have an answer.”

Humming, Jayce pinches his brows together as he thinks. “Alright, I’ll grant you a solar charger.”

“Easy. An e-reader. Mine has over five hundred gigs of storage and about the same number of books on it, the majority of which I haven’t read. If I finish a book every other day, I would be entertained for… 2.739 years. Maybe I’ll be rescued by then.”

“Hold on… did you just do that math in your head in like two seconds?” Jayce looks at Viktor in awe and he can’t help but feel a little flattered.

“Yes. I’m good at math,” Viktor shrugs.

“No kidding. I’m good at math but not that good. Are you a certified genius or something?”

“I may have skipped a couple of grades.” 

“Holy shit… I’m so curious what you do with that big brain of yours, but I know I’m not going to get an answer out of you.” 

“It shall remain a mystery,” Viktor smirks.

It’s almost three in the morning when their conversation dies down and it becomes apparent that it’s time for Jayce to leave.

Viktor doesn’t really want him to leave.

Standing and slipping on his boxers, Jayce looks out Viktor’s window and says, “Shit, it’s already snowing…”

Sitting up on his elbows, Viktor sees that it is, in fact, snowing. Snowing hard too. He’s not sure how he feels about Jayce making the drive back to Piltover in the middle of the night during a snowstorm. “Don’t like driving in snow?”

“Uh, no… snow makes me anxious. I almost didn’t come out tonight because I saw the weather report but, ah… I wanted to see you.”

Something about being the motivation for Jayce to venture out when he doesn’t want to makes his stomach twist in knots—he’s uncertain if it’s flattery or guilt. Viktor chews on his lip, contemplating what he should say. It wouldn’t be kind to kick Jayce out in such bad weather, so… “Just stay the night, then.”

Jayce turns to look at Viktor, his eyes wide with surprise. “Are you… are you sure?”

Shrugging, Viktor says, “Yeah, at this point, you can stay over. I trust you not to steal anything or do something weird.”

“I mean… yeah, I’m down. Do you have a spare toothbrush?” 

Viktor nods, getting out of bed and grabbing his own underwear to slip on. Taking his crutch, he heads towards the bathroom and opens a narrow closet next to it, finding the unopened toothbrush. “Here.”

So, they brush their teeth together and it’s… a little odd. Viktor has never brushed his teeth next to a hookup before, but Jayce is different. They’ve hooked up every week since they met in late September. He’s noticing new things though, like Jayce has an interesting, chaotic pattern of brushing his teeth, whereas Viktor brushes one quadrant after another.

Before they get back in bed, Viktor grabs a pair of socks from his dresser. Sitting down and setting his crutch between the bedframe and the nightstand again, Viktor pulls them on and gets under the covers.

“You wear socks to bed?” Jayce is giving him a soft look of amusement when he gets in after him, making Viktor flush a little.

“What? My feet get cold. Poor circulation.”

“Well I burn like a furnace so since you’re cold, we can huddle together.” Raising his eyebrows suggestively, Jayce gives him a corny grin.

Viktor rolls his eyes. “Is this your way of trying to get me to cuddle?”

“I mean… yeah?” 

“Give me one good reason to cuddle you.”

“Oh, I have several. One, I’m warm. Two, I’m comfy to lie on. Three, it feels nice. Four, you have an excuse to feel me up. Is that enough or should I keep going?”

Snorting, Viktor playfully shoves Jayce. “I think you’re just a sap. Don’t grow attached to me just because I’m letting you sleep in my bed.”

“Me? No, I would never,” Jayce teases, lifting his arm to invite Viktor into his embrace. “C’mon, promise I don’t bite.”

“You do bite, though. Hard and often.”

“Well… you know what I mean.”

Narrowing his eyes suspiciously, Viktor looks between Jayce’s face and his chest. A blush, that he hopes is being hidden in the dark, grows on his cheeks as he says, “Only because I’m cold.” 

Jayce pumps his fist in celebration and Viktor rolls his eyes fondly as he moves closer to rest his head on Jayce’s chest. It takes him a moment to get settled in but once Viktor is comfortably lying on top of Jayce… it does feel nice. Jayce’s broad arms wrap around him while he lets out a pleased sigh. Hesitantly, Viktor loops his arm around Jayce’s middle, reciprocating the affection.

“Thanks for letting me stay over,” Jayce says, rubbing Viktor’s shoulder. “Means a lot to me.”

Viktor shrugs. “I don’t mind. I had been… considering it.” 

“How long?”

“A couple of weeks… since we exchanged numbers.” 

“I was hoping you’d let me eventually. But, since you were so adamant about staying strangers, I assumed you wouldn’t agree to it.” 

“You could have just asked.”

“I didn’t want you to kick me out if I asked.”

Huffing, Viktor moves his hand to draw circles on Jayce’s chest, enjoying the feeling of the dark hair there. “I’m not that scary, am I?”

“You’re quite intimidating, actually.” 

“You’ve literally picked me up and thrown me around.”

“Size doesn’t matter.”

Viktor glances down pointedly towards Jayce’s crotch hidden under the blanket. “No, but it does help.”

Laughing, Jayce runs his fingers along the curve of Viktor’s spine. “Think you could go again or are you too tired?”

Viktor usually calls it after 3 am but his pussy flutters at the idea of Jayce being inside him again. “Fuck it, one more.”

Riding this time, Viktor takes all seven inches of Jayce’s cock until he’s full, relishing in the way his girth stretches him open. 

I bet he would feel even better without the condom on.

It’s an irrational thought that catches him off guard while he’s moaning and being impaled on Jayce’s length, one he’s never had before. Unprotected sex has been an explicit no because he’s not risking getting pregnant for the sake of a breeding kink. But… maybe he should consider different birth control methods other than condoms. That is if he and Jayce are exclusive. He shelves that thought for another time though and focuses on their shared pleasure.

Jayce leaves in the morning once the snow has stopped. He offers to get Viktor breakfast at the cafe nearby but he declines because he can’t be having breakfast with his casual hookup too. Getting snacks between rounds is one thing, but breakfast after he stayed the night is a whole other beast. 

An hour later his phone buzzes. 

J
got home safe
lmk when u wanna hang again 😘

Viktor reacts with a thumbs-up again because he’s been trying to keep contact to a minimum. He’s just hoping he won’t cave and start texting Jayce like they’re friends or something.

Chapter Text

Christmas, 2019

Viktor caved. They’ve been texting back and forth every day since Jayce stayed over for the first time. It’s not all day, and sometimes it’s just a couple times a day, but Viktor has still been entertaining it against his better judgement.  

It’s a week before Christmas and Viktor is sitting on the couch with Home Alone on in the background. He’s doing some work—or trying to—with Rio between him and his laptop. The counterproposal got denied, so they’re working on… implants intended to monitor the vitals of soldiers. Viktor is extremely bitter about it. 

His phone buzzes just as he’s starting to get distracted. The only people that text him are Sky, Powder, and now Jayce. He’s willing to bet on that last one. 

As predicted, it’s from Jayce.

Tuesday 7:32 PM 

J
what’s ur fave xmas movie?

V
Why?

J
curious
i have no ulterior motives
😇

V
… I don’t like the sound of this.
Give me one good reason.

J
pls
it’s important

Staring at his phone screen, Viktor debates giving in or not. He told himself he would never get to know his hookups, but Jayce is… well, he’s not just a hookup now. If anyone else were to label their relationship, they would consider it ‘casually seeing each other’, or fuck buddies to be more accurate. At this point, Jayce has found out enough tidbits about him to form a vague picture of who Viktor is. So, what’s the harm in it? 

V
Elf.

J
whoa
rly?
idk why but i thought it would be something like a xmas story

V
I like A Christmas Story too. 
What’s yours?

J
love actually  

Viktor rolls his eyes. Of course.

V
Ugh. You are a sap.

J
guilty
r u free xmas eve?

V
Maybe. Why?

J
could i come down ur chimney this xmas eve? 🎅🏽 

Viktor will not admit it, but Jayce got a little chuckle out of him with that one. However, he has a desire to be aloof so he pretends he didn’t like it. 

V
I hate you.

J
no u don’t 🌹

V
To be clear, I’m not letting you come inside me.

J
omg i didn’t mean it like that!! it’s just a pun!!

It’s 7 pm on Christmas Eve, which happens to be a Tuesday. Viktor has the entire week off so he already started his seasonal rotting, outside of the baking he did earlier that day, but he managed to clean up his living room and bedroom enough to be presentable. While he isn’t trying to impress, he doesn’t want Jayce to be turned off by his preferred at-home wear, which is sweatpants and a t-shirt. So, he wears a deep green turtleneck and a pair of black slacks, keeping his hair down and tucked behind his ears neatly. 

Viktor just finished getting ready when he hears a car pull up. Sure enough, there’s a knock at his door not a minute later and he goes to eagerly answer it. However, he pauses. Maybe I shouldn’t seem too excited to see Jayce and make him wait a little bit. Standing by the door, he internally counts to twenty before answering. 

Jayce is dressed more casually, wearing light jeans and a red knit sweater with a white Nordic pattern under his black winter coat. It actually looks handmade and Viktor can almost picture a doting mother making him a sweater—Jayce would be a mama’s boy. His intrigue is piqued when he sees Jayce carrying a flat white box with a red bow under his arm.

“Feliz Navidad,” Jayce says with a handsome grin. Viktor just noticed his hair is a little more relaxed too, not pushed back like he’s trying to present himself professionally. It’s cute how his bangs hang over his forehead.

“Veselé Vánoce,” Viktor responds instinctively, eyeing the box. “What’s that?”

“It’s something small, I promise. And… ah… a bit of a gag gift.” 

“As long as you’re not trying to woo me,” Viktor shrugs, stepping out of the way for Jayce to come inside. He sees that it’s snowing lightly and Jayce’s new, stupidly expensive Volkswagen ID.3 is in the driveway next to his used Toyota Prius. “How was the drive over?”

“Uh, it was okay. The snow is supposed to clear up overnight so I should be fine to leave in the morning.”

One less thing to worry about, Viktor thinks to himself… and then it hits him that he’s worried about Jayce. It’s fine. I’m just being a decent person by worrying.

“What time do you need to leave tomorrow?” Viktor asks as he heads toward his living room, not bothering to wait for Jayce to get his coat and boots off. “Also, I have a bottle of wine if you’re interested. It’s cheap, though.” 

“Uh, I need to stop at my place before I head to my mom’s… honestly, I should probably be out of here by 7:30,” Jayce says as he heads for Viktor’s couch where Rio is stretched out, scratching behind her ear. He sets the present down on the coffee table. Hm. Mom’s. Not parents. Divorced maybe? It doesn’t matter. I’m so curious what’s in the box, though. “Yeah, why not, I’ll drink it and try to keep my complaints to a minimum. Hello, Rio. Are you on the naughty or nice list this year?”

Rio meows in response and Viktor can’t help but laugh. “Considering she chewed through a bag of kibble one night and not only gorged herself, but made a mess all over my kitchen… I will say she’s on the naughty list.”

“Rio! That’s no way to behave, young lady,” Jayce pretends to scold her but continues to pet her.

“Can you get a couple of wine glasses? They’re in the top cupboard to the left of the sink,” Viktor requests as he gets the bottle of ice wine from the fridge.

“Sure.” Jayce joins him in the kitchen and grabs the wine glasses before pausing to stare at Viktor. “Ice wine?”

Viktor stares back at Jayce. “Yeah, what’s wrong with it?”

“That’s a dessert wine.”

Blinking and tilting his head, Viktor furrows his brows in confusion. “So?”

“Where’s the dessert? Have you even had dinner?”

“Uh… there is none, and no.”

“You’re a madman, Vik. I’m not letting you commit this crime against wine,” Jayce says, putting the glasses back in the cupboard. “You’re going to put that back in the fridge, we’re going to order dinner, and then dessert. We can have it then.”

The nickname throws him off. Only his closest friends—his chosen family—call him that. For some reason… I don’t mind it coming from him. Huffing, Viktor puts the bottle of wine back in the fridge. “I will only agree to this if we get Chinese food for dinner.” 

“Deal.” 

They settle in on the couch while Viktor opens his favourite Chinese restaurant on his phone and passes it to Jayce to browse.

“What’s good here?” Jayce asks as he scrolls before Rio, surprisingly, jumps in Jayce’s lap. “Oh, hola, hermosa chica.”

“You know, she’s never done that with any of my hookups so consider yourself honoured,” Viktor says with amusement, watching Rio lift her butt in the air when Jayce pets her backside. “All the dim sum is good, especially the shumai and har gow. I’m basic so I like the General Tao chicken and pork fried rice.”

“You wanna get a bunch of stuff and just share?” 

“Sure,” Viktor shrugs. They spend the next ten minutes debating what all to get and Viktor is definitely going to have leftovers tomorrow because of how much food they ordered. It’s agreed that Viktor will get dinner and Jayce will get dessert and they, preemptively, start to pick out dessert too while they wait for their food.

“What’s the best dessert place that delivers in your part of Zaun?” Jayce asks as he browses Uber Eats on his phone.

“Well, I’m pretty close to the Lanes so I can practically get anything. But, I’m not sure what’s open on Christmas Eve,” Viktor says, leaning into Jayce’s side to look at the options. “Do you like crepes and fruit smothered in Belgian chocolate?”

“Uh, what kind of question is that? Of course I do.”

Tapping a restaurant on Jayce’s phone, practically resting his head on Jayce’s shoulder, Viktor lets him look through. “I usually get the strawberry and banana crepe smothered in dark, milk and white chocolate.”

“Oh shit, that sounds good,” Jayce says, perusing the menu. “Honestly, I don’t think I need to look anymore.”

“Yeah? Will it be good enough to drink the ice wine with?” Viktor’s tone is teasing, which prompts Jayce to grin at him.

“I think so. This is a pretty good Christmas dinner, I think.” Casually, Jayce lifts his arm to wrap around Viktor’s shoulders and pulls him to his chest, which Viktor willingly does. “Would you wanna watch a Christmas movie?”

I wasn’t anticipating this turning into a hang out but, now that we’re here… why the hell not? “Sure. What do you want to watch?” 

“Well, would you like to watch your fave?”

“No. I save Elf for Christmas Day.”

“Aw, too bad. Well, what about Love Actually? Or are you above romances?”

“I’m not, I actually like romance and rom coms. However, I don’t like Love Actually. In my opinion, it’s a lot of terrible heterosexual nonsense. The only plus side is Alan Rickman is hot.”

“What about the musician and his manager? They kind of have a homoromantic thing going on.”

“Yeah, except they do it in a homophobic way. Plus he’s just an asshole to his manager.”

“Okay, point taken.”

“I just think it glorifies a lot of things, like power imbalances with the bosses romancing their secretaries, and Andrew Lincoln’s character obsessing over his best friend’s wife to the point where it feels like stalking. Like, could you imagine your best friend is filming your wedding but the whole time he’s filming your partner because he’s obsessed with them?”

“To be honest, he wouldn’t be my best friend anymore. I’d be fuckin’ pissed and would… maybe also punch him.”

“Yeah. Personally, that’s too close to home. Plus it just kind of makes me sad, so, no, I will not watch Love Actually.” 

“Wait, what’s too close to home?” Jayce furrows his brows at Viktor.

“Just the… someone obsessing with you when you don’t reciprocate those feelings,” Viktor says, clearing his throat. “It’s not a big deal. Don’t worry about it.”

“No, it is a big deal,” Jayce says as his grip tightens on Viktor’s shoulder. “What’s going on?”

I’ve only told Sky and Powder about this. Am I really willing to divulge this information to a man I’m just casually hooking up with? Viktor chews on his lip as he weighs the pros and cons of telling Jayce about it. What’s the harm?  

“It’s, um… you see, there’s this guy and he works at… another organization, and he’s coordinating a project our teams are collaborating on. Occasionally, that requires him to come to my work and interact with me because of my role. He’s, um… he’s been rather aggressively flirting with me. Every time I turn him down and he still hasn’t given up,” Viktor says as he looks down at his hands fidgeting with Jayce’s sweater. “It’s been going on for two years. He even started harassing me on LinkedIn.” 

“What the fuck? Can like, your boss do anything about it or is it out of their hands because he doesn’t work there?”

“That’s pretty much it. I’ve tried requesting another coordinator but the other organization basically told me to go fuck myself.” 

“He hasn’t… assaulted you, has he? If he has, you could go to the police, right?” 

Viktor scoffs. “He’s touched me but not anywhere that can get him in legal trouble. The police wouldn’t do shit though. He’s from Piltover and his family is very wealthy and powerful. Any harassment claims would disappear because they have the pigs in their pocket.”

“You, uh… you don’t like cops, huh?” 

“Understatement. I grew up in the Lanes during the '90s and early '00s. Back then, Zaun didn’t have its own department and the PPD would do whatever they wanted out here. False or exaggerated drug busts, sex workers being abused, frisking people minding their own business, you name it. I was frisked a couple of times even, I think because I’m visibly disabled,” Viktor says, staring into his lap as he recalls the worst of it. “One time, my neighbour got caught stealing twenty dollars worth of groceries because his family couldn’t afford to eat. Stuff like bread, cereal and peanut butter. They busted into his apartment, harassed his wife and children, then he went to prison for a year because they said he stole money too.”

When Viktor looks up, Jayce is just staring at him like he’s telling him the most fascinating and horrific thing he’s ever heard. “I… I had no idea. I was, um… I was a little sheltered if I’m being honest.”

Huffing out a laugh, Viktor says, “That doesn’t surprise me. Even when we became a borough in ‘99, it took a few years for Zaun to get organized with our own government representatives, but Pilties would say things like ‘what are you complaining about, you’re getting money from our government now’.” 

“Mierda…” Jayce murmurs, looking a little embarrassed. “I, uh, I admit I don’t know much about the Piltover and Zaun conflict or the history of the politics.”

“I recommend you educate yourself, given you, what? Grew up rich, went to a rich school, then got a job that’s making you richer? Sure, that’s an assumption of mine, but it’s what I’ve gathered from the way you casually display your wealth,” Viktor elaborates, raising a brow at Jayce.  

Jayce proceeds to flush and look a little sheepish. “I’m… not going to say that isn’t accurate. Growing up, my parents weren’t, like, rich-rich. Upper middle class, I guess you could say. Things, um, weren’t as stable when I was a teenager, so I had to work hard for my scholarships.”  

“Oh,” Viktor replies dumbly. I made maybe… too much of a harsh judgement on him. “Then… the new car and fancy watch?”

“I kinda got lucky when I founded my own company and it took off. That’s uh, that’s why I have… I mean, I don’t mean to flaunt my wealth. I just like nice things,” Jayce laughs awkwardly, grimacing slightly. “Does it… does it make you uncomfortable or…?” 

“Not… necessarily. As long as you’re not using it to try and spoil me like you’re my sugar daddy or something. I can’t be bought.”

“Nor did I ever think you could. Yes, I like giving people gifts and treating people, but I would much rather buy you takeout than a diamond watch.” 

Huh. I actually like that about him. Maybe he knows what his money is worth and he’s not just spending it however he pleases. “Good. I will take free food and booze anytime over jewelry,” Viktor says before looking at the box suspiciously, then at Jayce. “You didn’t spend too much money on whatever that is, did you?”

“God no, I got it for cheap on Amazon,” Jayce laughs. “I promise, it’s nothing huge. I don’t even expect you to use it, I just thought it would be funny.” 

“Can I open it now?” 

Jayce hums, considering it for a moment. “Let’s save it for after dessert. Now, I think we were in the middle of debating which movie to watch. Home Alone?”

“Watched it last week.”

“Home Alone 2?”

“I like the first half of the movie, hate the second half.” 

“Okay, uh… A Christmas Story?”

“Mm… not really in the mood,” Viktor says before frowning. “Sorry I’m being difficult.”

“What?” Jayce furrows his brows. “No, there’s nothing to be sorry about. I don’t think you’re being difficult.” 

“Okay… I, uh, actually tried dating a couple of times, when I was way younger and I thought I might have the patience for it. I’m not trying to imply this is a date, just that, eh, many of my dates called me difficult,” Viktor explains with a little bit of humility. “I’m a picky eater, I’m particular about my media, I like my things a certain way… that kind of difficult.”

“I don’t think that’s being difficult. You just like what you like and you’re not afraid to say when you don’t like something.” Shrugging, Jayce rubs Viktor’s shoulder and smiles at him. “Hey, I’m the one who freaked out because drinking an ice wine with no dessert physically pained me.” 

Viktor snorts and, suddenly, he doesn’t feel so insecure about his rigid likes and dislikes. “Point taken.” 

“What is your opinion of Die Hard?” 

“Will watch for Alan Rickman but everything else bores me. Action isn’t my thing.”

Jayce looks amused, still smiling at Viktor fondly. “You really like Alan Rickman, huh?” 

“He was kind of a… sexual awakening?” Although he’s acting casual, something about the way Jayce is smiling at him while they cuddle on the couch is making his stomach twist into a pretzel.

“Really? Was it Snape?”

“Yes. Bad character, but really hot actor.”

“Alright then… what’s your favourite Grinch?”

“I haven’t seen the new one that came out last year, mostly because I didn’t want to listen to Benedict Cumberbatch for two hours. The original is pretty nostalgic, I often watched it with my mom when I was a little kid,” Viktor says with a small smile. However, it shifts into a sheepish look of embarrassment. “I, uh… admittedly love the Jim Carry one. I remember seeing it in theatres and as an adult I, um, personally identify with the Grinch in that one.”

Cracking into a wide grin, Jayce says, “I’m on the same page as you. Love that one. You wanna watch that?”

“Sure—” The doorbell interrupts Viktor and his eyes widen. “Sakra, I wasn’t watching the app. Could you—?”

“Yeah, no problem.” 

Viktor sets up the movie while Jayce gets their food. When he returns, he sets the food down on the coffee table and says, “You want something to drink? I was gonna get some water.”

Blinking up at Jayce, Viktor tries to process what was offered. Why is he… taking care of me? Does he think I can’t get it myself or… is he just being nice? “I, um… I think I left my water bottle on my desk. But I can—” 

“No, you chill, I’ll go get it. Plates?”

“I’m fine just eating out of the containers,” he says with a shrug. 

“Sick. That just made you ten times hotter, by the way,” Jayce grins. 

Huffing in amusement, Viktor asks, “What? Me not wanting to make unnecessary dishes?”

“Yeah. My ex-girlfriend who is now just a good friend… well, she would never eat out of a takeout container. Don’t get me wrong, I love her, but I did feel like I had to be a little more buttoned up with her.”

Viktor isn’t sure why, but there’s an uncomfortable feeling stirring in his gut at the mention of an ex-girlfriend. It has nothing to do with the fact that it’s a woman, he doesn’t have any feelings of competition for men’s affections with women, but it still leaves an unsettling feeling inside him. 

Am I feeling… threatened? Is it because I hate to think of Jayce with anyone but me? He’s not my boyfriend, I have no right to be territorial, but there was that whole thing with that Tommy guy. I guess I just like keeping him to myself, though he’s probably hooking up with other people and I just don’t know about it.

Jayce doesn’t seem to notice Viktor having this internal struggle while he gets their drinks. By the time he comes back, Viktor has shoved the feeling down and put the thoughts away so he can just enjoy the night. 

Dinner is delicious, and the movie is just as goofy and entertaining as Viktor remembers. Halfway through the movie, they order dessert, and when it arrives, Jayce's eyes practically bug out at the sight of his crepe stuffed with fruit and drowning in chocolate.

“I have eaten a lot of desserts in both Piltover,” Jayce says between bites. “This is super simple but it’s one of the best I’ve had in recent memory. You really can’t go wrong with things smothered in chocolate.” 

“My thoughts exactly,” Viktor says, taking another decadent bite. As he’s chewing, he suddenly remembers, “We forgot about the wine.”

“Mierda! That was the whole point of getting dessert!” Jayce practically jumps up from the couch and heads to the kitchen connected to the living room. There’s only an island between them, so Viktor can see the disappointed look Jayce has when he removes the wine bottle from the fridge. “A screw cap? Really?”

“Oh, come on, you’re not actually that much of a snob, are you?” Despite the sentiment, Viktor still smirks with amusement.

“Yes, I actually am,” Jayce scoffs as he gets the wine glasses. “I need to get you to drink some real wine, not this grocery store crap.”

“Hey, I told you the second time we met, I’m not picky about wine,” Viktor says with a shrug. “It all more or less tastes the same to me.”

Sounding scandalized, Jayce says, “How dare you. What if I said the same thing about whiskey?”

“Well, then you’d just be wrong,” he grins. 

They banter, finish dessert and drink half the bottle by the time the movie is done. When it’s over, Viktor finally says, “Alright, it’s killing me. What’s in the box?”

“I suppose you could open it now,” Jayce grins, taking a sip of wine despite his complaints.

Picking up the box from the coffee table, he takes off the ribbon and starts to open it. On top of white tissue paper is a small card that says, in gold print, ‘For that special someone’. Confused, Viktor puts it aside and digs through the tissue paper and starts to laugh when he sees it. Pulling out the lingerie, he admires it for a moment. The bralette part of the teddy has a white faux fur trim and red velvet, where below the waistline is red sheer material with a slit down the front so it flares out to be more revealing. 

“Okay, I see how it’s a gag gift now,” Viktor says with a grin, recognizing the reference to Elf. “Not a bad choice.” 

“Glad you thought it was funny. I was looking for a fun gift idea, that’s why I asked what your favourite Christmas movie was.”

“Mm… so, is it just a joke or would you like to see me in it?” Holding it up to his chest, covering his sweater, he asks, “What do you think?”

Jayce’s eyes go wide and his cheeks are aflame. “Wait, are you being serious?”

“Deadly,” Viktor grins.

“Fuck yeah,” Jayce exclaims, looking like an eager dog waiting for a bone.

“Alright. Wait here and I’ll let you know when you can come to the bedroom,” Viktor instructs before picking up his crutch from where it was leaning against the couch and heading to his bedroom with the teddy in hand. Closing the door behind him, he puts down his crutch and starts to undress, socks and all. The teddy fits when he slides it on, reaching down just past his hip bones. However, he wants to add one final touch. Reaching into his underwear drawer, he pulls out a pair of lacy white panties to add to the ensemble.

Once he’s dressed, he fluffs his hair, sits on the bed cross-legged and calls out, “Okay, you can come in.” 

Moments later, the bedroom door is opening, warm light pouring in with Jayce silhouetted in the doorway. “Puta madre,” Jayce says, grabbing his chest dramatically as if he’s just had a heart attack. 

Viktor blinks at Jayce. “Uh… I don’t know much Spanish but I thought ‘puta’ meant ‘whore’?”

“Oh… oh, fuck. No, no, ‘puta madre’ basically means ‘holy shit’,” Jayce says in a panic, pushing a hand through his hair in… exasperation? Relief? Viktor can’t tell what Jayce is trying to express and he doesn’t know what to do with it.

Furrowing his brows, Viktor crosses his arms in front of himself self-consciously. “Do you… not like it? I’m confused because you bought it. Were you seriously just making a joke?”

“No, oh my god, Vik. I’m fucking floored. My brain’s not working because all my blood went to my dick,” Jayce rushes out, taking deep breaths. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make it seem like I wasn’t into it.”

“No, that’s okay. That’s a relief,” Viktor laughs awkwardly, trying to calm his own nerves. It’s so rare that Viktor feels shy around a bed partner, it’s an uncomfortable and unfamiliar feeling. Unfolding his arms, he relaxes his body language and leans back on his hands. “So… you really like what you see?” 

“Yeah… wait, I didn’t give you panties. Are those—?”

“They’re mine. I was, ah… thinking of surprising you. Do you like them?”

“Fuck, yeah. You look good in lace,” Jayce says, approaching the bed as he strips himself of his knitted sweater, leaving him in a white t-shirt. 

“Thank you. I’m glad you like them. I think you’ll like something else about them too,” Viktor says with a sly smile.

Raising a curious eyebrow, Jayce asks, “What’s that?” 

“They’re crotchless.” Biting back a grin, Viktor uncrosses his legs and spreads them, putting his pussy on display for Jayce. 

“Dios mío, ¿eres un ángel?” Jayce murmurs, getting on his knees and crawling until he’s between Viktor’s legs. He presses kisses to the inside of his right knee before looking up at him. “You’re so fucking hot, you know that?”  

The compliment undoubtedly strokes Viktor’s ego, making him feel a little more confident. “I’m glad you think so.” 

“I want you to sit on my face, please,” Jayce practically begs and it does even more for his ego. There’s nothing like having a tall, muscular man on his knees begging for your pussy. 

“I suppose that can be arranged. Get up here.” Viktor tilts his head towards the head of the bed. When Jayce stands, Viktor places his hands on his stomach, moving down to start unbuttoning his jeans. “But let's get these off first.”  

“Happy to,” Jayce says, looking down at Viktor with mirth. 

“Also, I have a better idea.” Sliding Jayce’s jeans down, Viktor grins up at him. “Sixty-nine?”

“Oh, fuck yeah.” After practically tearing his shirt off, Jayce bends down and captures Viktor’s mouth in a heated kiss. Between their joining of lips, Jayce rambles. “So… fuckin’ sexy. No puedo… creer que—ah—pueda tenerte.” 

As much as Viktor loves hearing Jayce babble in Spanish, he loves drowning out his words with his cunt more. Sixty-nine is not his go-to, it’s physically demanding because he needs to be on top. Lying down when you’re sucking a dick is too much of a choking hazard in Viktor’s opinion, and Jayce wanted him to sit on his face anyway. It’s a little clumsy at first, but once they get the position and angle right, it leads to rather intense orgasms. 

By the time they’re done, Viktor’s legs are gelatin, and he has to shakily reposition himself in order to lie next to Jayce, but the other man instead pulls him down to lie on top of him. He’s a willing passenger and keeps his hand over Jayce’s heart as they cuddle. Jayce’s hand pets his hair and Viktor shuts his eyes for a few minutes as he recovers in the afterglow.

Viktor has a dark, dirty secret. Something he will never admit to anyone, living or dead. 

He’s started to fantasize about Jayce being his boyfriend. It always happens in quiet moments, or intense ones, like this one. The cuddling is what started doing it to him. Viktor is still solidly in denial, but he guiltily indulges in the thoughts of having Jayce as more than a casual hookup. Maybe he would be fun to date, he thinks, reflecting on the night. This was basically a date.  

I’m getting too comfortable, comes the rational voice in his head. However, the delusional part of him dismisses it. It’s fucking Christmas. I’m going to let myself have this. 

“Let me carry you to the bathroom,” Jayce says when they’re both cognisant enough after their orgasms to even consider getting ready for bed. 

Huffing, Viktor replies with a sharpness in his voice as he sits up. “You don’t need to coddle me. I can walk ten feet to my bathroom.” Getting Jayce to carry him for sexy reasons is one thing, but carrying him for functional reasons is another.

“You were on your knees for a long time, your leg is probably killing you,” Jayce argues with a frown, sitting up too and placing a hand on Viktor’s lower back. “Just let me take care of you, Vik.” 

The new nickname makes his stomach churn with nervousness while he chews on his lip. He’s uncertain if the familiarity is warranted but… they’ve been doing what they’ve been doing for three months now. Maybe the familiarity is earned at this point. Am I willing to accept help from a man I’ve only known a few months? I don’t want him to think I’m weak and need to be taken care of.

Viktor clearly took too long to respond because Jayce adds, “Look, I’m not trying to infantilize you or fawn over you, I just know you must be in pain and I want to help. I’m never going to treat you like you can’t take care of yourself because I know you can. If you really don’t want me to, tell me and I’ll back off.”

Sighing, Viktor reluctantly agrees. “Okay. Only because my legs are very tired.” 

“Glad I didn’t need to convince you further.”  

“One second, let me get this off.” 

“I can help with that too,” Jayce grins and that Viktor knows is for a perverted reason.

“You just like getting me naked,” Viktor snorts.

“Uh… yeah? Is that a crime?”

“No, it’s an observation.”

With gentle hands, Jayce pulls the teddy over Viktor’s head before kneeling in front of him while Viktor lies down so Jayce can peel his panties off too. Before setting his legs down, Jayce kisses the insides of his calves, running his hands over the pale skin of his thighs.

“If I wasn’t so tired, I’d go again,” Viktor says, letting out a yawn as if to punctuate the sentence.

“Maybe in the morning? Do you like morning sex?”

“I do. I’m usually half-asleep so I like to be slow and lazy, which is the appeal for me.”

“Well, I’ll check in with you when I’m awake,” Jayce grins softly before carrying Viktor to the bathroom to get ready for bed. 

As promised, Jayce wakes him up at ten to seven to see if he’s in the mood for another round. Sure enough, he lets Jayce fuck him slow and steady while making out lazily. After he comes, good enough that his toes curl and he cries Jayce’s name, he falls back asleep. Viktor only vaguely remembers saying goodbye to Jayce from bed and receiving a kiss on his forehead before he was out again. 

He wakes up again at 10:30 to Rio screaming in his ear. “Alright, alright, I’m up,” Viktor groans, sitting up drowsily. Throwing on an oversized long-sleeve and a pair of boxers, Viktor goes about his morning routine after he feeds a very displeased Rio. He’s usually up by nine to feed her if he’s not working, so she wasn’t happy to wait. 

Viktor makes breakfast for himself of bacon and pancakes before sitting down on his couch to watch Elf. Rio sits in his lap for most of it and snores loud enough that he has to turn up the TV. It’s just around one that his phone vibrates.  

Pow 🦋
hey bro
merry xmas 
dad + pops are wonderin if ur still good for 4

Vik 🐐
Veselé Vánoce.
I’m still planning to be there for 4.

Pow 🦋
did u make that tasty bread for us again this year? 🥺🍞

Vik 🐐
Yes, I made Vánočka. 
I was very tempted to cut into it myself but I saved it for you guys. 

Pow 🦋
u made a great sacrifice for this family 😔 

Vik 🐐
As I do every year. 😔

Viktor spends the afternoon with familiar comforts. While he feels bad for the workers and delivery drivers working Christmas Day, he can’t resist the temptation of ordering McDonald’s for lunch. Around three he starts to get ready, dressing himself in simple black pants and a loose teal knit sweater, a little more casual than what he had worn for Jayce last night. 

Rio gets an early dinner and he starts to pack up his gifts for his found family into his car. Vi’s is the biggest, but not so big that he can’t carry it under his arm to avoid a second trip. The Last Drop, and Vander and Silco’s home, is only an eight-minute drive from Viktor’s, so he has plenty of time when he leaves twenty to four. 

When he pulls up, Powder is waiting outside for him, leaning up against the side of the bar. He parks on the street rather than the parking lot behind the building since the Lanes are dead for Christmas Day.  

“Meeerrrrry Chrimbus!” Powder calls when he steps out of his sedan, approaching the back door. “Can I help carry anything?” 

“You could take Vi’s present. Everything else I can carry in one hand.”

“Which is hers, the big one?” She asks, pressing her face up against the back window. “Who’s the itty bitty one for?”

“You,” Viktor says, nudging her out of the way to open the door.

“What? You got me the tiniest gift in the world! I thought I was your favourite!”

“Pow, you’re twenty-six, by now you know that size doesn’t matter.”

“It does in some cases,” she pouts, picking up the medium-sized, thin and rectangular gift for Vi. 

“Yeah, I don’t want to hear about your boyfriend’s dick,” he replies bluntly, picking up the tall gift bag, small box and cellophane bag with the bread inside. “Speaking of, is Ekko joining us?”

“Nah, he went back to NOLA to spend Christmas with his fam, but he’s gonna be back for New Year’s.” Walking ahead of him, she opens the front door for him to enter first. “How’s the hip today? You gonna be okay with the stairs?”

“Eh… it’s seen better days. A flight won’t kill me though.” He won’t mention that sixty-nineing his fuck buddy has left him unusually sore today because she’ll likely think the weather alone is what’s making his hip flare up anyway.  

The upstairs, spacious apartment of The Last Drop smells divine when Powder opens the door. Vander and Silco are both great cooks, so Viktor has no doubt the meal won’t be anything short of fantastic. When he reaches the top of the stairs, Vander is basting a roast on the oven rack while Silco is topping his sweet potato casserole with marshmallows to finish baking with the roast. Vi is sitting curled up in one of the chairs by the fire, playing something on her Switch with an intense expression.  

“Veselé Vánoce, everyone,” Viktor greets, setting the gifts down on the entryway table so he can strip himself of his jacket and shoes.

“Merry Christmas, Viktor!” Vander greets enthusiastically, pushing the oven rack back in and then taking the casserole from his husband to add next to the roast. 

“Merry Christmas,” Silco responds, his voice not as booming and jovial as Vander’s but kind in his own quiet way.  

“Merry Christmas, dude—fuck. Pow, can you help me with this fuckin’ ghost?” Vi asks as she pushes a hand through her short hair in frustration.

“Yeah, yeah—can’t believe you’re having this much trouble with Luigi’s Mansion of all things.” 

“Listen, it’s not that easy!”

They place the gifts under the modestly sized tree, decorated with an eclectic collection of ornaments ranging from cute Hallmark ones with the years on them to little frames with Powder and Vi’s school photos. After, Powder goes to help Vi with the game while Viktor sits at the kitchen island opposite where Silco is beginning to make a batch of mulled wine on the gas stove. 

“How was your Christmas so far?” Vander asks, tossing some of the veggies that had been roasting. 

“Good. Uneventful. Mostly watched movies with Rio,” Viktor answers. It’s a white lie but not one that will hurt anyone. His pseudo-fathers don’t need to know he spent the night before with the man that they have been implying is his boyfriend for months.

“You didn’t see anyone?” Silco asks nosily, a small smirk on his thin lips as if he could read Viktor’s mind. 

“Who would I see? Sky and Jax are visiting his family in Hawai’i.” 

“I believe we have a mutual acquaintance who has taken the moniker ‘nerdy hunk’, from what our daughter has told us.”

Narrowing his eyes at Silco who has a sly smile still on his face, Viktor quietly replies, “So what if I saw him?”

“Nothing, it’s just interesting.”

“What’s interesting?”

“How much time you spend with a man you’re supposedly not dating, and on holidays nonetheless.”

“How well do you happen to know him?” Viktor furrows his brows in question, before suddenly feeling embarrassed. “I mean… you know what, I don’t care. He’s nobody to me. Don’t tell me anything.”

“At this point, you probably know him better than I do,” Silco teases, getting out cups for the wine. “I’ll drop it, though. Mulled wine?”

“How dry is the wine?”

“Not that dry, I also added some apple cider so it’s sweeter.”

“Sure, I’ll try it.” Silco hands Viktor a mug—Powder’s Ron and Harry Christmas sweater mug from her Harry Potter phase. Viktor takes a sip of the rich ruby liquid, getting notes of star anise and orange peel, the sweet cider dulling the presence of the alcohol. “That’s pretty good, actually.”

“How is the little lady doing?” Vander asks, putting the veggies back in the oven. 

“She’s doing good, except last week she chewed into her bag of kibble and ate her weight in it.”

Vander lets out a bark of a laugh, “A girl after my own heart.”

“Girls, you want wine?” Silco calls to Powder and Vi. 

“Hit me,” Vi agrees.

“Hell yeah! Let’s get shwasted!” Powder cheers, skipping over to the kitchen island and looking at Silco expectantly. “Hook a gal up, Pops?”

“No getting ‘shwasted’, I don’t want a repeat of last year,” Viktor says bluntly before standing with his mug and walking over to the chair closest to the fire. 

“Oh god, don’t remind me,” Vi says with a groan. “I’m never playing that Hallmark drinking game again.”

“Thanks, Pop,” Powder nods to her adopted father as she takes a mug for her and Vi, walking back to the couch and handing one to her sister. “C’moooon, there’s a new Netflix Christmas movie! We could use the same rules. And it has Vanessa Hudgens!” 

“Wait, Vanessa Hudgens? Didn’t she do the one where Duchess Vanessa or whatever switches places with another Vanessa?” Viktor admittedly loves a bad Christmas movie. The good ones are great, but a shitty Hallmark or Netflix affair is always entertaining, especially with Powder and Vi. They’ve watched at least one bad one every year since they were still teens.

“Ding-ding! And I do believe we had a lot of fun with that one. So, shall we celebrate the new Christmas Queen?” Powder gives Viktor and Vi a devilish grin. 

“Only if we put a cap. I don’t want another major hangover,” Viktor concedes, raising his mug. “I’ll stick to one cup until we start.”

“I can get behind that,” Vi nods. “After dinner?” 

“Hell yeah—wait, when are we doing presents!?” Powder already looks like she’s vibrating with excitement.

Viktor snorts. “You’re cute, you know that?”

“Aww, thanks—wait, why?”

“Because you’re just as excited for presents as you were when you were thirteen. You haven’t changed a bit.” 

“Oh, you’re so right, Vik,” Vi laughs. “Remember when she got her DS that one Christmas? If I remember right, she friggin’ fainted.”

“Can you blame me!? All the cool kids had one. It was social suicide not to have one in middle school!” Sipping her drink, she then looks between them. “Sooo…. After dinner? Before the movie?” 

“I don’t care,” Viktor shrugs. 

Powder pauses, looking at him expectantly. “Soooo….”

With a heavy sigh, Viktor says, “Okay, yes, after dinner.”

Powder giggles with anticipation like a kid again. “By the way, did you get up to anything last night?” She grins, almost knowingly, as she sips her mulled wine. 

Narrowing his eyes at her, Viktor straightens his back and says, “Nothing.”

“Wait, am I missing something here?” Vi asks, looking at her sister. 

“Vik totally spent last night with his boyfriend.”

“How many times do I have to tell you? He is not my boyfriend.” 

“Except you’ve been seeing him for three months and you just admitted you spent Christmas Eve with him,” Powder returns with scrutiny, raising a questioning brow.

“Dude, that’s basically a boyfriend in your books,” Vi agrees, nodding like she’s the authority on the matter.

“He’s my fuck buddy, that’s it.” 

“Uh huh, because that went so well last time,” Powder replies. 

“Yeah, that whole thing with Charlie was messy,” Vi cringes awkwardly. “Are you using this guy as a distraction?” 

“No, I’m using him for company,” Viktor huffs. 

“That’s just a boyfriend without the label. C’mon, Vik, why don’t you just give dating a chance?” Powder prods, frowning.

“Because I tried dating and it sucked.”

“Well, yeah, of course it’s going to suck,” Vi adds, shrugging her broad shoulders. “But it’s worth it when you find the one.”

“And how would you know, Vi? I don’t see you with a girlfriend. You’re in your rockstar era, so why would you settle down?”

“Because I’m looking for the right person. I mean, yeah, I’ve casually dated, but I’m still at least trying to look.”

“I don’t want to look because I don’t want to settle down,” Viktor says firmly, crossing one leg over the other and folding his arms while holding his wine. “Pow, I don’t get why you’re making such a big deal out of this. He’s just a man I’m casually having sex with.”

“I’m making such a big deal about it because I saw the way he looked at you,” she huffs, mirroring Viktor’s body language.

That intrigues Viktor, prompting him to furrow his brows. “What do you mean? How did he look at me?”

“Like he wanted to marry you and have your babies.” 

Viktor frowns, thinking back to last night. They’re… just being casual. There’s no meaning behind them spending part of the holiday together, or hanging out together, or the kiss on the forehead Viktor is pretty sure Jayce left him that morning. “I think you’re reading too much into this, Pow. You don’t even know the first thing about him—I don’t know the first thing about him.” 

“You’ve been hooking up with the dude for three months and you don’t know anything about him?” Vi asks skeptically.  

“Well, I know his name, he lives in Piltover, he’s thirty-one and he speaks Spanish. That’s pretty much it.” His favourite Christmas movie is Love Actually. He’s a wine snob. The nape of his neck is sensitive. He’s generous and kind. His cologne smells of sandalwood. He believes his work is making the world a better place, even though I have no idea what work that is. “Can we please drop it?”

Sighing heavily, Powder says, “Fiiiiine.” Looking over to her sister, she smirks. “Wanna place a bet on whether or not Vik makes it official? I’m willing to bet a hundred smackers on yes, before the end of 2020.”

Vi purses her lips in thought, glancing between Viktor and Powder. “I don’t think I’m willing to risk it, you’ll probably win that bet.”

“Oh, come on!” Viktor exclaims, though he’s only half as annoyed as he sounds. “You both seriously think I’m going to cave and date a man just because he’s hot and nice to me?”

“Oh, and he’s nice, that’s another thing we know about nerdy hunk now,” Powder grins. 

“You need to stop calling him nerdy hunk.”

“I won’t stop until you give me a name.”

“Never.”

“Alright, kids, dinner’s ready!” Vander interrupts, clapping his hands to get their attention. 

Dinner is delicious, as expected. The roast practically melts in the mouth with its savoury gravy, the sweet potato casserole a welcome contrast to the saltiness of the roast and vegetables. Vander and Silco had really outdone themselves.  

After dinner, Viktor does his best to help clean up, though Vi and Powder happily do most of the heavy lifting. Once leftovers are packed and dishes are cleared, they gather near the tree, sitting in the chairs by the fire again. 

“Who wants to go first?” Vander asks with a wide grin.

Immediately Powder’s hand shoots up. “Me, me, me!” Powder is usually the one to go first given that she’s the ‘baby’ of the family, so it’s no surprise. “I wanna open Vik’s first.” 

Viktor watches as Vander hands the small, small box wrapped in plain silver paper to Powder, his stomach churning with nervousness. He knows, rationally, Powder would probably like whatever he gave her, but he spent a lot of time on it so… it’s important to him. His eyes remain on her lean hands as she tears open the wrapping paper and pulls the lid from the box. She stares into the palm-sized box with curiosity before she pulls it out. 

The small, deep blue butterfly sitting on a pastel pink base is crafted out of an assortment of metal scraps, gears and other finer metal pieces, decorated with gems made of coloured glass. He managed to get a bulk order of odds and ends online to make it out of, once he had the idea. Spray paint is his enemy, the fumes are harsh on his asthmatic lungs, but he was able to paint the thing outside before it got unbearably cold. While most of it was constructed out of random bits and bobs, he did have to hunt down some specialty parts for the mechanism—ones he repurposed from an old music box. “There’s a turnkey on the bottom,” he prompts.

Flipping it over, she winds the turnkey and music begins to emanate from the base while the butterfly’s wings flap back and forth. Powder is utterly silent as she watches it move and listens to its mechanical melody. Finally, she starts to sniff and looks at him with teary eyes, “It’s so… it’s so perfect, thank you, Vik.” Bursting into a sob, she crosses the short distance between the couch and his chair, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. 

“I’m glad you like it,” Viktor whispers as he wraps his arms around her waist and holds her tightly, letting her cry into his shoulder. Christmas is literally the only day of the year Viktor will exchange a gift with someone, so he tries to make it mean something. Clearly, he did something good if this is the reaction he gets out of Powder. 

“Can you open mine next?” Powder asks, wiping her eyes on the sleeve of her sweater once she pulls away. 

“Sure,” Viktor nods before Vander hands him a medium-sized, rectangular object wrapped in Christmas paper with festive cats on it. It’s maybe an inch thick while at least fourteen tall and twenty wide—a photo or canvas, maybe? 

Powder sits back down and watches as Viktor unwraps it and, sure enough, it’s a spray-painted canvas. Rio is lazing on her favourite pillow, a salmon pink one, with a little tiara on her head. Her paws are folded to her chest and her soft belly is on display. Her crystal blue eyes match the background, making her stark white fur stand out even more. The style is somewhere between pop art and street graffiti, similar to the neon butterfly hung up in his room. It’s beautiful and captures her doofy elegance perfectly. “This is beautiful, Pow, thank you,” Viktor says with a soft smile. “Your art is even better every time I see it.” 

“Thanks, bro. I knew there was nothing better I could give you than a painting of your precious angel.”

“I might hang it by her tree in my living room,” Viktor replies, admiring the spray paint base texture and details added to capture Rio’s adorable face. “You know… I still have that butterfly in my bedroom.”

“Wait, the one I made like a decade ago?”

“Yeah. It’s one of my favourite pieces of art I own. This might be my new favourite, though.”

Presents go around one by one. Powder gifts Vi a pair of dark pink boxing gloves, customized to have her name embroidered on them. Boxing is something Vi got into after prison to get out her residual anger—it’s almost meditative for her. She immediately tries them on and bumps them together before hugging her sister, still wearing the gloves. Vi gifted Powder a large biography and art book on Basquiat, one of Powder’s personal inspirations for her art, and she squealed in delight after unwrapping it. Powder and Vi also went fifty-fifty on a couple’s spa package for Silco and Vander. It’s something they wouldn’t buy themselves but they could both use it, especially Silco with all the political stress. 

“I want Vik to open mine next,” Vi says, grabbing a thin packaged gift. If Viktor had to guess… it might be a comic book, knowing their shared interest. 

Suspiciously, Viktor carefully unwraps the deep red wrapping paper and his eyes light up at the sight. Uncanny X-Men #200: The Trial of Magneto is in his hands, one of his favourites of all time, in cellophane packaging with a sleeve of cardboard to support the back. “Vi… is this an original print?” 

“Straight from ‘85. Now, it’s not mint, there’s a wrinkle on the back cover, but everything else is in peak condition.”

“Holy shit, Vi,” Viktor says dumbly. He doesn’t collect comics or keep up with the current arcs anymore, but the nostalgia makes the single comic book a touching gift. “Thank you. I will have to figure out how to display it. Maybe I’ll frame it. Could I… would it be okay if—?”

“Hug?” Vi easily reads what he’s trying to say, standing from the couch to come to him. Her thick arms wrap around him and squeeze, making him choke in surprise.

“Are you trying to snap me in half?” He jokes though it’s partially genuine.  

“Oh, sorry,” she says sheepishly, loosening her grip. 

Viktor pats her on the back before they part and smiles at her. “Seriously, it’s very thoughtful. Thank you. Want to open mine next?”

“Hell yeah!” 

Vander hands her the sizable package and she raises a curious brow at Viktor. Tearing open the paper, her eyes light up. “Holy shit! I look so fucking cool!”

“Wait, what is it? Turn it around!” Powder demands.

Turning around the black picture frame, Vi reveals three photos. The top photo is a landscape A4 of her bathed in red stage lights, playing her guitar and screaming into her mic. The other two, portrait A5s in black and white, are two close-ups. One is her hand strumming her Fender and the other is her head bowed mid-headbang during a guitar solo. 

“Daaaamn, you make Vi look so badass,” Powder whistles. 

“Dude, when did you take these?” Vi asks as she turns it back around to admire the photos. 

“I dusted off my camera and brought it when you played here in August. I had the idea back then.”  

“Man, this is wicked. I love it.”  

“Vi’s music is not my taste, but I can appreciate how… powerful she looks,” Silco comments with a small smirk.

“Could you open mine next?” Viktor directs the question to Silco and Vander.

With a nod, Silco grabs the tall but thin gift bag. “Wine?” He guesses, quirking a brow at Viktor. 

“Not quite.” 

Tossing the tissue paper aside, Silco pulls the bottle out of the bag and scrutinizes it. “Tuzem…ak? Did I say that correctly?” 

“Close. Tuzemák—the Á sounds like ‘how’,” Viktor corrects. “It’s Czech rum made with sugared beets. It wasn’t easy to get my hands on. In truth, I never had it before I ordered it, except my mom would soak raisins in the tuzemák for the Vánočka, which I did this year. I’m usually not a rum person but it has cinnamon and caramel notes, which I like.”

“That sounds delicious. Anyone up for some hot buttered rum?” Vander asks with a wide grin. 

“Oooh, me!” Powder bounces in her seat. 

“Last but not least,” Vander says, grabbing three identical gifts from under the tree. He hands each of them one, though there seems to be a slight difference in them because he’s specific about who gets which one. 

When it’s sitting in Viktor’s lap, he sees that the gift is square and thick with soft edges. If he has to guess, it’s some sort of book. “You want us to open them at the same time?”

“Yes, feel free,” Silco says with a wave of his hand.

They all get to unwrapping, Powder and Vi both tearing into the paper like wild animals while he carefully unfolds the ends. Powder gasps in the background, but once the paper is off, Viktor finally reveals that his is a green, leatherbound photo album. Glancing up, he sees that Powder’s is blue and Vi’s is red, but they’re all identical otherwise. 

Flipping open the album, the first photo he’s greeted with is all five of them posing for a picture. He remembers where and when it was taken—Salem Harbour in October of 2008. Vander had just narrowly snuck in the photo before the timer went off, so he appears a little out of breath with his arm around Silco in the back. They look so youthful in their late thirties and Silco is still sporting a ponytail. Viktor is in the middle, in front of Vander and Silco, with an arm around Powder, to his left, and Vi, to his right. 

He was twenty, Powder was just about to turn fifteen, and Vi was going on eighteen. She had spent that summer in juvie, so they agreed a family vacation was in order. Powder was going through her goth/emo phase and suggested Salem so they could attend the Halloween parade, and she was soon to be the birthday girl so she got her way. It was a lot of fun, even though Viktor got car sick. There’s a vague memory of appropriately finishing Devil Bones by Kathy Reichs in the hotel room that night. Powder was reading The Hunger Games at the same time.

Flipping to another page, there’s a picture of him reading a comic book—Uncanny X-Men of course—while a thirteen-year-old Powder rests on his shoulder, fast asleep. The photo on the opposite page is from Vi’s sixteenth birthday party. Powder is ‘helping her’ blow out the candles while Viktor laughs next to them. He helped Silco make the cake.  

Looking up from the album, Viktor looks at his pseudo-fathers with gratitude, barely maintaining his face absent of any more fragile emotions. “This is… very thoughtful, thank you.” 

“Aw man, I don’t think I’ve seen even half of these,” Powder says with awe as she flips through the book. “Oh man, there’s the Halloween I got Vi to dress as the Wario to my Waluigi!”  

“Oh god, no, let me see!” Vi says in a panic, flipping through the pages. “Ugh, I look terrible in yellow… I can’t believe I let you draw that moustache on me with your eyeliner.”

They spend at least half an hour going through the photo albums, reliving fond memories. There’s laughter and tears and it might be one of Viktor’s favourite Christmas presents he’s ever received. 

As promised, Vander makes hot buttered rum for them to pair with slices of buttered Vánočka. They settle in the living room to watch The Knight Before Christmas with the usual Hallmark drinking game rules. Viktor cuts himself off after two mugs and a glass of his usual whiskey, not wanting to be too hungover tomorrow. 

After the movie, Silco, Vi and Powder get locked into a game of Uno while Vander makes another batch of the sweet hot drink from the Tuzemák. Viktor sits by the fire, decompressing after a long night of socializing, before Vander approaches him and offers him a mug. “Mind if I sit?”

“Not at all,” Viktor accepts the drink with a nod of appreciation. “Thanks. Do you like it, by the way?”

“Love it. It’s a very nice spiced rum,” Vander says as he sits on the chair opposite him. His mug of hot buttered rum is clasped in his meaty hand, steam rising gently in the firelight. “How are you doing, kid?”

Viktor sighs heavily as he stares into the crackling flames. “Honestly? Kinda shit.”

“Yeah? Wanna talk about it?”

Viktor shrugs but he doesn’t need much convincing to talk to one of the only stable father figures he’s had in his life. “I’m bitter about my job. I was really enjoying it, thought me, Pow and our team were doing good work, only for it to be completely shat on by the new dean.”

“Powder has talked about it too… she says you seem unhappy.”

“Yeah, I am, I just… you know me. I’m not good when it comes to change. Takes me about a year of deliberation to make a big life decision. So, maybe by this time next year, I’ll have a different job.” 

“And how are things with Jayce?”

Viktor sighs again, rolling his eyes toward the man. “C’mon, Van, not you too. Please don’t tell Powder his name, she’s been really fixated on this whole arrangement I have with him.”

“I’ll try not to pry but, if you’ll take my advice… you’re not getting any younger and you need to start thinking about what you want for your future. I know you’re not meant to be alone. I know you want companionship just as much as the next person.”

His jaw tightens as he tries to remain calm. He’s irritated because Vander can read him as easily as Viktor can read an equation. “I don’t get why you’re so fixated on this Jayce thing too.”

“Because I know what it’s like to have a good thing right in front of you and not see it,” Vander says softly, his broad shoulders rising and falling with a sombre breath. “You know… I went through a similar thing to you. Not losing my mom to cancer but… I lost my first love to war.” 

Viktor pinches his brows, looking at Vander curiously. “You… what?” 

“I was nineteen. My first boyfriend joined the military and we were long-distance for a while. But then, the Gulf War started in 1990. I tried to keep in contact with him as much as possible but… he died in combat.” There’s a sullen smile on Vander’s lips that makes Viktor’s heart weep. “I went on a bender. Drank nonstop for months until my friend convinced me to get clean. I was heartbroken and I felt like the only thing that would get me through a day was at the bottom of a bottle.”

“Then… I met Sil. We worked at a factory in the fissures together and while I was trying to get my life together, he was just there and all the signs were pointing at him. He was going to be my salvation, my redemption, my purpose. But I was terrified to love again after losing the last man I loved.”

“I know it’s a little different but… I know why you would hesitate to love someone when the person you loved the most in this world is gone. I was, and it took me two years to accept what Silco and I had. I was fighting it for so long because I was terrified to love and lose it all over again.”

Swirling the mug idly, Viktor studies the amber concoction in thought before he looks up at Vander. “What… What made you change your mind?”

“I realized it’s better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all,” Vander says with warmth in his eyes, smiling softly. 

“How very Hallmark of you,” Viktor huffs in amusement. “I get it. I see your point. I just don’t get why everyone is so fixated on this thing I have with Jayce.” 

“I’m telling you, it took me a while to see what was right there, staring me in the face, for the same reasons you’re resisting now. Try to… keep an open mind. Maybe your signs will point to Jayce, maybe not, but it’s worth being open.”

“I’ll… consider it,” Viktor replies carefully, though he already knows that Jayce is not ‘the one’ for him. Viktor doesn’t buy what rom-coms and paperback romance novels try to sell him. Romance is appealing in theory but isn’t very practical, at least not for him. However, Viktor decides to get something out of this conversation. “What do you know about Jayce, by the way?”

“Well… I know he’s some kind of doctor? Can’t say if it’s medical or academic, I didn’t get that much out of him. I also know he’s rather generous. When we did our fundraiser for Zaun General’s new children’s wing last year he donated five thousand and brought a lot of other Pilties that donated generously. He even volunteered to help out.”

A doctor? Interesting…

Viktor tries to remember that fundraiser, but he doesn’t because… “Pow and I were in Boston that weekend, weren’t we?”

“Yep. Honestly, I would have thought to introduce you sooner had you shown up that day. He’s a good kid.” 

“He’s thirty-one, hardly a kid.”

“When you get to fifty, everyone’s a kid,” Vander teases.

“Why do you think he’s… good for me?” 

“Clearly smart, kind, seemingly hardworking from the way he’s always coming from the office. Plus he’s absolutely your type,” the man grins, taking a sip of the spiced drink. “I don’t think it would hurt for you to try.” 

“It could hurt is the problem,” Viktor grimaces, finishing his drink. 

“Just give what I said some thought. Though, I know you’re stubborn like a goat, so you’ll do whatever you’re going to do regardless of what anyone says.”

“You know me so well,” he grins. Glancing at his watch, seeing it’s just after 11 pm, he says, “It’s getting late, I think I’m gonna head home.”

Viktor hugs everyone goodbye, but he whispers ‘I love you’ to Powder as they embrace, receiving the same in return. She offers to help carry his stuff downstairs but he insists he’s fine on his own. 

Stopping at his car to put everything in the trunk, he then orders an Uber home, planning on returning for it tomorrow. It’s quarter to midnight when he gets home and is greeted by his furry companion. He immediately heads to the bathroom to get ready for bed, feeling sluggish from all the alcohol, and when he finally gets in bed, he notices he has a notification. 

Wednesday 11:53 PM

J
hey
u up?

Thursday 12:11 PM

V ❤️‍🔥
You’re not seriously texting me ‘u up’ when we just fucked this morning, are you?

J
i didn’t mean it like that!
i just wanted to wish u a merry x-mas one last time

V ❤️‍🔥
Uh-huh.

J
scout’s honour or whatever

V ❤️‍🔥
Were you even a scout?

J
for one summer when i was 8 but then i got bored

V ❤️‍🔥
Okay. Merry Christmas. Are you done?

J
i was wondering how ur day was

V ❤️‍🔥
Why?

J
idk
just curious
ur an interesting and mysterious person

V ❤️‍🔥
And I like to keep it that way.

J
not even a “yea it was good” or smth? 
a gift u liked? 

V ❤️‍🔥
Fine. It was good.
You’re going to see it anyway, but my sister made a painting of Rio.

J
oh?
u have a sister? 👀
can i see it now?

Viktor was lucky enough to have taken a photo of the painting to send to Sky earlier, so he decides, what’s the harm? 

V ❤️‍🔥
Sort of. Adopted sister.
I guess so. 
[image attached]

J
omg it’s incredible
look at her in all her royal glory
tell ur sis her painting is 🔥

V ❤️‍🔥
I shall deliver the message. 
How was Christmas with your mom?

J
pretty good
she made all my favourite foods for brunch
i got her a ring for x-mas
it has hers + my dads + my birthstones 

V ❤️‍🔥
Oh. That sounds very thoughtful.

J
thx ☺️ 
anyway i just wanted to say hi before i crash for the night

V ❤️‍🔥
Well, now you did.
Goodnight, Jayce.

J
night beautiful 😘🌹

Chapter Text

New Year’s 2020

Friday 8:23 PM

J
r u free nye?

V ❤️‍🔥
I might be.
Depends on what time.

J
any time
i have no plans

V ❤️‍🔥
Really? A handsome man like yourself not getting invited to NYE parties?

J
i was
i would just rather have a quiet night in
and get laid 🤷🏽‍♂️

V ❤️‍🔥
Okay.
I have no plans and I don’t care about watching the ball drop anyway.

J
come to my place this time?

V ❤️‍🔥
I guess I could.

J
would u like dinner too?

V ❤️‍🔥
I could be persuaded into a meal. Takeout?

J
nah
let me cook for u

V ❤️‍🔥
You know I’m not your boyfriend, right?

J
i know
consider this a ty for all the great orgasms 😉

V ❤️‍🔥
I could bring the champagne but I fear you won’t approve of my choice. 

J
lol i can get the bubbly too 🍾🥂
u like steak?

V ❤️‍🔥
I do like steak.

J
any allergies?

V ❤️‍🔥
I’m lactose intolerant so just warn me if there’s dairy so I can bring lactaid.

J
no worries
no dairy involved
7?

V ❤️‍🔥
I’ll see you then.

It’s snowing but not too heavily when Viktor drives over the bridge to Piltover on New Year’s Eve. Before he left Jayce had warned him it would snow and Viktor can’t stop wondering where Jayce’s snow anxiety comes from. 

Is he just overly cautious? That doesn’t seem like Jayce, but what do I know?

This isn’t a date, even though it feels like a date. After Christmas, he’s become wary of what their hookups are going to look like from now on. To show how much it’s not a date, Viktor decided to dress extremely casually. He’s wearing an old grey Nirvana shirt under a black and green Zaun U hoodie, and grey sweatpants. 

Viktor has never been to Jayce’s condo. He only knew Jayce lived in a condo because he made a comment about how nice it must be to have a house to himself. Viktor rents of course because he has problems with commitment. He doesn’t think he’ll leave Zaun and he likes living close to the Lanes, but for some reason, he just doesn’t want to fully commit himself to one place. And despite that, he’s lived in the same house for six years.

The building he pulls up to is fancy. Less than ten years old, all glass and steel, and at least twenty stories tall. He enters the underground parking garage and drives into one of the guest parking spaces. Gathering his overnight bag and his crutch, he locks his grey sedan and heads to the entrance. Punching in Jayce’s unit number on the intercom, it rings half a dozen times before the door buzzes signalling it’s open. 

He rides the elevator to the sixteenth floor and follows the signs to unit 1610 at the end of the hall. Glancing at his watch, he sees it’s ten to seven. He’s known for being punctual. Knocking, he only has to wait a few moments before Jayce opens the door. He’s dressed the most relaxed Viktor has seen him thus far, wearing a worn Star Wars t-shirt and a pair of dark green sweatpants, barefoot too. Okay, maybe I’m not the only one trying to make this as casual as possible. Jayce grins at him. “Hey, beautiful.”

“Hold on, I’m dressed in sweats and my hair is in a messy bun and you’re calling me beautiful?” Viktor looks at him suspiciously, like he might be bluffing. “I intentionally underdressed.”

“Yeah. You’d look beautiful in a garbage bag,” Jayce says with a shrug.

“I don’t believe you,” Viktor huffs. “Are you going to let me in or am I supposed to eat dinner out here?”

“Oh, right.” With a sheepish smile, Jayce opens the door more and steps out of the way. Viktor tries not to look around the spacious condo like he’s a goddamn tourist, but the open concept doesn’t leave much to the imagination. 

An all-glass back wall, marble countertops, tall ceilings and leather furniture all point to the fact that Jayce is well off—very well off. Maybe he is a medical doctor. Viktor can’t help but wonder what Jayce thinks of his humble little house given that he’s living in a skyscraper in Piltover. Sure, Viktor makes good money, but not ‘I’m buying a large condo in the city’ money. Other than the obvious display of wealth, the place smells heavenly.

“Let me show you to my room so you can put your stuff in there.” Jayce closes the door behind Viktor and guides him to a large black sliding barn door next to the kitchen. Opening it, he reveals his bedroom which is… a little stale. All black, grey and cold. It doesn’t feel like Jayce at all—like he doesn’t live here, he just treats it like a hotel room. The king-sized bed up against the back wall is the only inviting thing about it, which perplexes him. 

Setting his bag down on the bed, Viktor looks back towards Jayce and says, “Um, your place is… nice.”

“C’mon, Vik, you can be honest,” Jayce grins. “I can tell you hate it.”

“I’ve never been good at hiding when I don’t like something, no.”

“That’s fine, I don’t love it either. I’m kind of considering it a… temporary situation. I’ve only lived here for two months. I have no clue about interior decorating so I went with neutral everything.”

“Mm. Clearly, you need someone with taste in your life.” 

“Yeah, well, my friend with good taste recommended this place to me because she also lives in the building. The rent isn’t bad, for what it is, and I was just looking to get out of the north side. Kinda wish I looked longer but I was desperate to get out of my last place because it, uh… well it was an old building and it got infested with bedbugs. I had to ditch pretty much everything. I only started to hate this place about… two weeks in?” Laughing a little, Jayce returns to the kitchen, and the fact that he hates it too comforts Viktor. 

“Do you need help with anything?” Viktor exits Jayce’s room, watching him return to the stove where he’s heating a searing pan. 

“Nah, you just sit and be pretty.” Jayce flashes Viktor a charming grin, heating some oil in the pan. 

There’s a small dining table just off to the side of the kitchen so Viktor decides to sit there, facing Jayce while he cooks. “I’ve got to be honest, it surprises me that you can cook at all.”

“Why? Thought I was a helpless bachelor?”

“Maybe a little.”

“I have to admit… I only learned to cook to impress dates,” Jayce says sheepishly before adding a steak to the pan. “Not saying this is a date, that’s just the reason. It has helped get me laid.”

“Understandable. I think it’s sexy when a man can cook.”

“Should I be doing this naked too? Would that add to it?”

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “You don’t have to be sexy for me, you just are. I’m going to fuck you either way.”

“How generous of you. How do you like your steak?”

“Medium-rare.”

“Good choice.”

When Jayce plates the meal, Viktor’s stomach growls at the scent alone. A generously sized steak with roasted potatoes and broccoli is set in front of him and he can’t wait to dig in. After setting down the plates, Jayce grabs a bottle of red wine that had been breathing and two wine glasses. “I know red’s not your favourite but I think it’s a crime not to have red wine with steak.”

“Are there any other wine rules you abide by? You seem very… particular,” Viktor says with a light teasing tone as Jayce pours him a glass.

“Yes, I’m pretty rigid when it comes to pairings. I will not drink anything but white with chicken and fish. Shellfish, turkey, duck and vegetarian dishes can go either way depending on how they’re prepared. Pork and beef are always red.” Finally sitting down, Jayce raises his glass. “To a good meal with great company?”

“I can agree to that,” Viktor says, raising his glass before taking a sip. Humming, he does his best to fairly judge something Jayce explicitly picked out compared to Viktor’s method of buying whatever is cheapest. “It’s a little dryer than I prefer but it’s flavourful. I like it.” 

“This is one of my favourites,” Jayce smiles before taking a sip from his own glass. “Admittedly, I like dry wine but this one isn’t as intense as others I typically go for. You like sweeter ones, then?” 

“You could say that. The fruitier the better for me, admittedly.” Picking up his fork and knife, Viktor cuts into the juicy steak, the aroma by itself making his mouth water. When he finally gets a savory bite in his mouth, he sighs in appreciation. “Okay, yeah, you know how to cook.”

Jayce grins proudly as he cuts into his own steak. “Thank you, I’ll take that as a compliment.”

The meal is delicious through and through. The potatoes are soft and flavoured with butter and herbs while the broccoli has the sharpness of garlic and lemon. Viktor is satisfied by the time he’s through with his plate and finishing the wine. “What happened to champagne, by the way?”

“There’s still champagne. I figured we’d have it with dessert.”

“What’s for dessert?”

“I picked up some chocolate-covered strawberries earlier today. Figured they were a safe bet for dessert based on last week,” Jayce says with a wink.

“Okay. You fed me and I need some time to settle for dessert. What now?”

“Want to finish the wine and chill?”

“I could be convinced. Are you trying to get me drunk, though?”

“Not at all. You don’t have to drink if you don’t want to,” Jayce shrugs. “I actually try not to drink too much but the wine is good and I did buy a nice champagne.”

“You don’t like getting drunk? I usually avoid getting drunk-drunk but mildly is fine.” I won’t mention my tendency to drink away mental breakdowns.

“It’s not that. I’m really not supposed to mix alcohol with my medication. I avoid hard liquor because of the high alcohol content too.” 

Huh. I wonder what medication that would be but it’s not my business to pry into his personal health. “I see. You sure you’ll be okay to drink two bottles?”

“It’s only eight, we’ve got hours to sip,” Jayce shrugs. “Wanna listen to some music? I’ve got a pretty hefty collection of records.”

“Sure.” Jayce guides him to the corner of the open layout that acts as a living room. Not only is there a leather sofa, but there’s a sizable TV, a little bigger than his own, a PS4, and a sideboard with a record player and two crates of records on top. “May I take a look?”

“Sure, go ahead,” Jayce nods, taking Viktor’s glass of wine and setting it on the coffee table as he sits. 

Approaching the sideboard, Viktor leans his crutch against it and instead puts most of his weight on his good leg so he can browse with both hands. It’s an interesting collection—The Beatles, Adele, Pink Floyd, Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift, Tears for Fears—he must have at least sixty if not more. Viktor tries to take the situation into account because while he’d love to listen to Nirvana, it’s not exactly ‘let’s make out and maybe even have sex on the couch’ music. It takes him at least five minutes to settle on one and when he does, Viktor says, “I don’t know how to actually use a record player but I’ve got my pick.”

Jayce stands and approaches, taking the record from him. “Rumours by Fleetwood Mac? Classic.”

“I grew up with that album. It was one of my mom’s favourites.” It takes him a moment to realize he had let slip such a personal detail, using the past tense so Jayce at least knows his mom is dead, but Viktor pretends he’s unbothered by it. Jayce doesn’t comment on it, but he gives him a curious, empathetic look briefly. 

Sitting on the couch to return to his glass of wine, he watches Jayce set up the record, carefully placing it on the turntable and aligning the needle with the starting groove. Second Hand News begins to play and nostalgia hits him immediately. “What’s your favourite song off the album?”

“I’m basic. I love Dreams. It’s just pure, quintessential Fleetwood Mac,” Jayce replies, sitting down and picking up his glass again. “What about you?”

“Songbird. I love how slow and sweet it is.”

“Ohhh, is someone else maybe a bit of a sap?”

Viktor rolls his eyes. “My taste in music doesn’t indicate a preference for romanticism.”

“No, but I bet you’re a romantic if you’d let yourself be,” Jayce teases.

Viktor quirks a brow. “And what tells you that?” 

“You like romance movies, love songs, and I’m pretty sure I spotted some paperback romance novels sitting on your nightstand a few times.”

Flushing, Viktor averts his eyes. “I like the concept of romance. I don’t like being romanced myself.” At least, that’s what I tell myself. I just can’t afford to indulge in romance.

“So, I have to ask… are you aro?”

Viktor blinks at Jayce, not expecting the question. “Huh. No one’s ever asked me that,” he admits. When he reflects on his love life or lack thereof, a distinct memory comes to mind. “No. I was in love once. At least I think it was love.”

“Could you tell me about it?”

“Why?”

“Just curious what kind of man could capture your heart. You seem like a tough nut to crack.”

Huffing out a laugh, Viktor shakes his head. “You’re not wrong. No, it was a boy, actually, when I was twelve. He was, ah… a couple years older than me but he treated me with kindness and smiled at me. I was often ostracized at school because it was the ‘90s, I was visibly disabled, trans, gay, and also skipping grades. I didn’t have a lot of friends,” Viktor says nonchalantly. His childhood is a topic that he speaks of with clinical language, otherwise it would make him miserable. “I remember the first day of high school he sat with me at lunch because he saw I was alone. He had just moved to Massachusetts so he didn’t have any friends either. I followed him around like an infatuated puppy after that. It was unrequited though.”

“What happened? Like, how did you know it was unrequited?” Jayce appears invested in his little story, finishing his glass of wine and setting it on the table. 

“He married my best friend,” Viktor says and smiles with amusement.

“What?” Jayce’s jaw literally drops.

“Yep, I introduced them in the second semester of ninth grade and they started dating that summer. They’ve been together since.”

“That’s crazy. Is it ever weird? Like, because he was your first love?”

“Mm… not really. I’m kind of detached from that time in my life…” Viktor peters off, chewing his bottom lip as he debates being honest or not. 

I’ve never told anyone about this. Sky doesn’t even know. Am I really admitting this to a man I’m casually fucking? 

Fuck it. 

“Sometimes… I wonder how my life might have been different if I had told him how I felt. But, then I would be taking away my best friend’s happiness. Her being happy is more important than me having this fantasy where I’m happily married and not so lonely all the ti—”

Viktor stops speaking, finally catching up to the fact that he was in the process of spilling his guts, feeling extremely embarrassed. Kurva. Why did I say that? I don’t get why he’s so easy to talk to. I didn’t mean to be that honest. With his cheeks flushed, he turns his head away and quietly speaks. “I mean… never mind. Forget I said anything.” 

“No way in hell, Vik,” Jayce replies, his voice calm and gentle. Pulling on Viktor’s shoulder and cupping his cheek, Jayce forces Viktor to look at him. “I know how you feel... I’m lonely too.”

Swallowing nervously, Viktor’s eyes flicker from Jayce’s hazel to his slightly chapped lips. Licking his own, Viktor whispers, “Maybe we can be lonely together.”

“I’d like that…” Trailing off, Jayce closes the distance between them, pulling Viktor closer by his waist and cradling his face tenderly. With a soft sigh, Viktor returns the kiss and sets down his glass of wine blindly. Placing his hands over the sides of Jayce’s neck, he feels the other man’s pulse rabbit against his palms. Their lips meet delicately, like Jayce is worried if he kissed Viktor harder he might shatter, all to the sound of Songbird playing in the background. 

Guiding him to lie down on the couch, one of Jayce’s hands navigates beneath Viktor’s t-shirt, his calloused touch causing Viktor’s stomach to tremble. Jayce’s mouth leaves him, only to kiss the hinge of his jaw, then his neck, and finally sucking a bruise on his collarbone. Hiking up his shirt, Jayce kisses his way down Viktor’s sternum, stopping at the moles under the right side of his ribcage and one to the left of his belly button. 

“Jayce…” Viktor’s voice comes out breathy and high, his slim fingers combing through Jayce’s hair as he tugs down Viktor’s sweatpants to make a bruise on his hip bone. “Please… ať se cítím méně osamělý.”

Jayce doesn’t bother asking what he said or what he’s asking for, but he doesn’t need to. He pulls Viktor’s sweats and underwear off by lifting his legs, and tossing them to the floor. Gently, he holds Viktor’s legs, kissing his right calf between the straps of his brace, then his knee, and finally his inner thigh while he lowers himself down. Jayce slowly begins to lick at Viktor’s cock, easing his legs to rest over his shoulders, earning a quiet moan from him. 

Closing his legs around Jayce’s head, Viktor fists Jayce’s hair as he grinds against his tongue. He feels more debauched and vulnerable with his shirt shucked up, hoodie and socks still on, compared to if he was fully naked. Jayce consumes him, taking his cock in his mouth and sucking eagerly, pulling the most pitiful sounds out of his depths. 

Suddenly he feels the touch of Jayce’s fingers caressing his skin, brushing over Viktor’s pussy lips as a way of silently asking for consent. “Please,” is all Viktor says before Jayce pushes one thick finger inside him, barely stretching him open. His bed partner knows by now that Viktor can easily take two off the bat, so he’s intentionally teasing him. “Don’t toy with me, Jay…” 

It seems the new nickname did something to Jayce because he inhales sharply and immediately presses a second finger inside Viktor. Even though he appreciates Jayce’s mouth sucking at his cock and being filled, it’s not enough—he needs Jayce now. “I’m ready, just come here… please,” Viktor demands, remembering his manners at the last moment.

Jayce pulls away only to kiss Viktor’s hip bone, up his stomach and chest, then finally to his lips. Now that they’re pressed close together, Viktor can feel Jayce’s erection making a home between his thigh and his groin. The kiss is messy and desperate, and he can taste himself on Jayce’s tongue. When Jayce parts from Viktor’s lips, he says, “Hold on, I gotta get a condom.” 

The idea of Jayce parting from him at all makes Viktor feel uneasy. He doesn’t want to wait any longer because he needs this man inside him now. “Have you taken a test?”

“Huh?”

“STIs. Have you been tested for them?”

“Uh, yeah, earlier this year, why?”

“And have you had unprotected sex with anyone since then?”

“No… Vik, are you being serious right now?”

“Yes. Last question, can you pull out?”

“I—yeah, I can.”

“Then fuck me already.”

“Mierda, no puedo creer que esto esté pasando,” Jayce mutters, shoving down his sweatpants and underwear just enough to free his cock. Within moments, Jayce is easing inside him, stretching him wide, causing Viktor’s mouth to hang open as a silent signifier of pleasure and overwhelm. 

Gripping Jayce’s shoulders while he sinks inside of him, Viktor revels in the feeling of Jayce’s skin—hot, textured, unfettered—inside him. This is the first time he’s had unprotected sex in his thirty-two years and he can easily see himself getting addicted. When Jayce bottoms out, he captures Viktor’s parted lips in another heated kiss, wrapping one arm around Viktor’s waist for leverage and the other hand planted on the couch arm to keep himself from falling on top of him. 

They’re chest to chest, and Viktor can feel Jayce’s warmth through his shirt, but it’s not enough. Tugging at the hem of Jayce’s shirt, he starts dragging it upwards, expecting Jayce to do the rest of the work. Predictably, he follows Viktor’s guidance, pulling away so he can discard his shirt haphazardly, knocking over Viktor’s wine glass as he does. Neither of them care though, especially not Jayce, because he’s diving back in to kiss Viktor like an affection-starved man—maybe he is. Maybe they both are with the way Viktor reciprocates.

Lifting his left leg to wrap around Jayce’s hip, he taps Jayce’s ass cheek with his heel because it’s what he can reach, signalling him to move. They don’t need to exchange words at this point because Jayce is already so familiar with him that he easily follows Viktor’s request, bringing his hips back before sinking inside of him again. Viktor feels needy from how tightly he clings to Jayce’s shoulders, digging his nails into the muscular flesh, while he moans against Jayce’s lips. 

It isn’t long before Jayce is picking up speed, thrusting into him with urgency. His grip on his waist tightens and his tongue tangles with Viktor’s with a fiery passion that makes Viktor yearn. There’s something different about this time, like there’s a fragility present while Jayce takes him apart, and Viktor can feel the delusions hitting him again. I’m having sex with my boyfriend on his couch to Fleetwood Mac and it couldn’t be more perfect, is what he thinks in the heat of the moment.

The record stops, clearly reaching the end of the A-side, and static crackles from the speakers. All that can be heard is the wet sound of skin slapping against skin, and a cacophony of moans, growls and whispered words between kisses. Viktor doesn’t even know what he’s said, and he can hardly pay attention to what Jayce is saying, but he’s mostly speaking Czech so at least he isn’t embarrassing himself. At one point, he’s pretty sure Jayce calls him ‘baby’, but Viktor is too far gone to care.

His orgasm is quickly approaching from the way Jayce’s cock is repeatedly hitting his cervix, fueling a pleasure deep in his core that only Jayce has been able to give him. It causes his legs to quake as he tries to say ‘I’m close,’ but he’s not sure what language it comes out in. It’s spoken between their teeth and noses bumping together, and Jayce’s glasses getting in the way occasionally. Jayce seems to get the hint though, because he starts absolutely plowing into Viktor, dragging shameless sounds of pleasure out of him. 

When he comes he scrapes his nails over Jayce’s back, undoubtedly leaving welts behind. Fucking him through it, Jayce buries his face in the crook of Viktor’s neck, rambling though Viktor is too fucked out of his mind to process any of it. Except Jayce stills and rasps “Oh, fuck,” and suddenly he’s pulling away entirely. However, Viktor feels… a warm, wetness inside of him.

“What…” Viktor trails off when he sees a trail of cum leading from his pussy to Jayce’s cock, dripping on the leather. “Did you…”

“Fuck, I am so sorry, I got carried away and remembered at the last moment, I—oh my god—” Jayce looks like he’s about to hyperventilate, panic-stricken.

“Sakra… get your ass to a pharmacy and buy me Plan B, now.” 

“Uh…” Looking down at the mess on the couch, then over to the puddle of wine on the floor, he asks, “Can I clean up the cum and the wine first?” 

“Yes, because I sure as hell am not cleaning it up.”

“Again, I am so—”

“Stop it. It’s partially my fault because it was my idea,” Viktor huffs out a laugh. “My mistake for trusting a cis man to pull out.”

“Yep. I’m never trusting myself with that task again. I’ll grab a cloth and clean you up,” Jayce says before standing and disappearing into his bedroom.

Viktor lies on the couch and thinks about his choices. I’m going to absolutely regret this later but right now, I don’t. That felt fucking good.

It takes fifteen minutes for Jayce to clean up Viktor, the couch, and the spilled wine on the fake wood flooring. Viktor gets his clothes back on while Jayce is cleaning up the spill when he says, “It’s almost ten. I don’t know what pharmacy would still be open on New Year’s Eve.”

“There’s a twenty-four-hour CVS a few blocks from here. I’ll walk,” Jayce replies, discarding the paper towel now soaked red. Immediately, he pulls on his shirt and starts putting on his shoes. “I should be back in less than half an hour. Do you want anything else while I’m out?”

Viktor looks at Jayce with scrutiny and asks, “Are snacks on the table?”

“Anything’s on the table after I just accidentally came inside you.”

“Even a million dollars?”

“Okay, I don’t have a million dollars but if I did… I mean, yeah, I’d give it to you.”

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “Cheetos will suffice.” 

“Alright, text me if you think of anything else,” Jayce finishes while he puts on his coat, grabs his keys, and heads out the door. 

Right after Jayce leaves, Viktor realizes he has no idea what he’s going to do for the next half hour in an apartment he’s unfamiliar with. He could snoop, but that would be rude. However, he’s feeling sweaty and sticky, so a shower couldn’t hurt. 

Viktor grabs his crutch and makes his way to Jayce’s bedroom where he knows there’s an ensuite bathroom. When he opens the door, his jaw drops. Not only is it big, but there’s a separate shower and tub. And the tub is huge, with jacuzzi jets. “Oh, if he gets to come inside me, I get to use his tub,” Viktor says to himself as he starts to prepare himself a bath. He even finds lavender bath salts in the vanity cabinet and adds it to the hot water filling the tub. 

When he gets naked and sinks into the hot, hot water, he lets out a pleasant sigh. Okay, so not everything about his condo is terrible. 

Viktor is only soaking for ten minutes before he hears the door open and Jayce calls his name. “In here,” Viktor calls back and a minute later, Jayce appears in the doorway holding a small box. 

“Ah, enjoying one of the only perks of my place?” Jayce grins, sitting on the edge of the tub. 

“I admit, this tub is the only thing I’ve liked so far,” Viktor shrugs. “I figured you wouldn’t mind if I helped myself.”

“Not at all. Mi casa es tu casa.” Holding up the box of Plan B, Jayce says, “The pharmacist warned me that it can cause nausea, vomiting, dizziness, headache and abdominal pain.” 

“That sounds lovely.” With a sigh, Viktor relaxes further into the tub. “Unless I have some form of birth control on deck, never let me convince you into unprotected sex again.”

Laughing, Jayce says, “I don’t know, I’m pretty easy to influence. I’ll try but I can’t promise anything.”

Viktor scoffs. “Men.”

“Off topic but… you know, I have a good view of the harbour from up here.”

“Okay… good for you?” Viktor pinches his brows together in question. “Why are you saying this?”

“They set off the fireworks from the harbour. We’d have a pretty good view from my windows.” 

“Oh, what time is it?” 

Looking at his watch Jayce says, “10:36. So, we’ve still got some time. You can take your bath at your leisure while I set up a comfy space for us to sit. We could drink some champagne, eat snacks and dessert, and get cozy. Whatcha say?” 

“I could be agreeable to that plan,” Viktor replies with a slight smirk. “I do expect you to dote on me as repentance because I’m going to have nausea and cramps because of you.”

“Hey, you accepted partial responsibility too!”

“Yeah, but I didn’t come inside me when I said I could pull out,” Viktor says with mild annoyance. 

“Okay, yeah, point taken.” Taking Viktor’s hand that’s hanging off the side of the tub, Jayce kisses his knuckles. “As you wish.”

“Princess Bride, really?” Viktor snorts. 

“Hey, it’s a classic for a reason,” Jayce grins, releasing his hand. 

“We didn’t finish listening to Rumours. Think we could listen to side B while we watch?” 

“I’d love to.” 

By the time Viktor is done in the tub and dressed in his black pyjama pants with white cats on them and a faded NYC t-shirt he’s had going on sixteen years, it’s already ten after eleven. Behind the couch, closer to the wall of windows looking out to the Piltover harbour, Jayce has put a large duvet out on the floor with pillows to sit on. The bottle of champagne is on a tray with a pink cardboard box, next to Viktor’s Cheetos and some Ruffles and dip for Jayce. This is actually kind of sweet of him. Feels like an indoor picnic.

“Is it a crime to mix Cheetos and whatever fancy champagne you got?” Viktor asks, sitting down on one of the pillows and setting his crutch on the floor next to him. 

“Eh… not a crime. Distasteful, but I won’t judge,” Jayce teases, sitting next to Viktor and opening the pink box to reveal a dozen chocolate-covered strawberries of varying types. “What’s your favourite chocolate, by the way?”

“I love dark chocolate, but I’ll pretty much eat any chocolate—I admittedly have a bit of a sweet tooth.”

The record plays quietly in the background and for a brief moment, Viktor is taken back to the memory of Jayce’s lips meeting his to the chorus of Songbird. Maybe we could be lonely together. Sitting on the floor, drinking champagne, eating chocolate-covered strawberries and anticipating fireworks doesn’t sound so lonely, at least not with Jayce here.

“I got some pastries, by the way. For tomorrow morning,” Jayce says casually. “If you want to stay for some pastries and coffee, that is.”

Is it having breakfast with my casual hook-up or just eating pastries? Does that count as a new boundary being crossed? “What kind of pastries?”

“Chocolate croissants and blueberry custard danishes. They’re from a French bakery downtown that’s known for the croissants.”

Fuck. That sounds good. It takes Viktor a few moments to decide which is going to win the debate: his brain or his stomach. “I could be convinced to stay for a little while.” 

“You know, I just realized… I don’t know how you like your coffee,” Jayce says as he reaches for the champagne bottle that is done breathing. He pours Viktor a glass first, handing it to him.

“Black,” Viktor states simply, taking the glass. “Thanks.” 

“Black? I thought if you had a sweet tooth you’d like your coffee sweet too?” Pouring himself a glass, Jayce sets the bottle down again and leans back on one of his hands.

“No, coffee is different. I’m very rigid on drinking black coffee.”

“Damn, couldn’t be me. Flavoured lattes are my weakness. I wait all year for PSLs to come back.”

Viktor snorts. “Of course you would. You’re a sap and a basic bitch.”

Jayce’s mouth falls open, staring at Viktor with offense. “How dare you.” Within moments his face cracks into a smile. “Nah, you’re totally right. I’m aware I have some very basic tastes.”

“Nothing wrong with that. I love junk food,” Viktor nods to the bag of Cheetos. “I order McDonald’s at least every other week. I bet the employees know ‘Viktor C.’ intimately by now and that I always order the same things.”

“Viktor C., huh?” 

Viktor’s cheeks heat up and rather than saying anything, he takes a sip of the champagne.

“Jayce T., to even the playing field,” Jayce says with amusement before frowning. “Hey, we’re supposed to cheers first!” 

Viktor has only had half a sip so he immediately lowers the glass. “Sorry.” 

“Hey, listen, we’re spending time together. Inevitably we’re going to learn things about each other. I know you wanted to remain strangers and we can do that as best we can, but that’s the reality,” Jayce shrugs.

With a sigh, Viktor nods. “You’re right. I’ve only done the… fuck buddies thing once before. Last time didn’t work out so well, so I’m cautious about this whole situation.”

“What happened last time?” 

“He fell in love with me. I was kind of just using him and I was too much of a coward to make that clear to him. I was nineteen and I didn’t really have my shit together. The weirdest part is he was older than me—quite a bit older—so you’d think it would have been the other way around traditionally.”

“You don’t seem like one for tradition.” Shifting slightly closer to Viktor, even though there’s barely two feet between them, Jayce wraps a hand around Viktor’s waist casually. “How much older was he? How’d you meet?”

“He was twenty-seven. I was in my third year of my Bachelor’s degree so most of the other students were older than me in general, but this was his second degree he was working on. We ended up working on some class assignment together and he started to flirt with me.”

“Wait… you were in your third year of a Bachelor’s program when you were nineteen?”

“Yeah. I would have been in my fourth but I took a year off.” 

“Holy shit, you started college when you were sixteen?”

“I told you I skipped a couple grades,” Viktor smirks with amusement. “Alright, enough about my academic history, are we doing this cheers or not?”

“Right. To… a healthy fuck buddy relationship?” Jayce grins cheesily, and something about it makes Viktor’s stomach do cartwheels in his abdomen. I feel a little smitten… just with his face. And his cock. Nothing else.

“I can cheers to that,” Viktor lifts his glass, meeting Jayce’s in the middle to clink delicately together. Finally taking a proper sip of the champagne, Viktor hums in appreciation. “I like this better than the red.” 

Jayce makes a similar sound of satisfaction, nodding. “Noted. It’s a lot sweeter than the red which personally isn’t my favourite.”

“Sounds like we need to compromise whenever we drink wine.”

“I’ll have to try and find something in the middle for next time… what do you look for in a whiskey, by the way?”

“For me, it’s all about the notes, I like sweet and smokey ones. My go-to for common, widely commercial whiskeys is Crown Royal for the caramel and vanilla flavour. But, I like to try a lot of small batch whiskeys. Whenever I go to buy some I try something new.” 

“Like I said, I can’t drink a lot of the hard stuff, but I’d love for you to, I don’t know… give me an exclusive whiskey tasting?”

“Mm… I suppose I could arrange something like that. I’d be curious what a man with the palette of a sommelier would like in terms of whiskey.”

“I was curious, what do you think of beer?” 

“Loathe.”

“Hm… vodka?”

“Despise.”

Jayce chuckles. “What about gin?”

“Gin is okay,” Viktor smirks. 

Viktor loses track of time as they snack and talk, somehow finding the most mundane conversation entertaining. Favourite flavours to favourite books, what movie they last watched, and their best (read: drunkest) New Year’s Eve memories. The chocolate strawberries are juicy and sweet, making a weird but kinda tasty combination with his Cheetos. They’re already on their second glass of champagne when his phone in his pocket vibrates and, out of curiosity, he glances at his notifications.

11:59 PM

Pow 🦋
SAY 👋 TO 2019 BITCHES 🎊🥳🎉

“Oh, shit, it’s about to start,” Jayce says, clearly looking over his shoulder. However, as soon as Viktor notices, Jayce flushes. “Oh, uh, sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“I don’t care, Jayce,” Viktor replies, putting his phone down and staring at him. Jayce looks like what Viktor imagines would be the perfect boyfriend. Nevermind that he’s tall, buff and handsome. He’s soft around the edges, appearing so utterly human sitting in his pyjamas on the floor of his condo while stealing some of Viktor’s Cheetos. Jayce’s expressive eyes shine like beautiful ponds of lily pads when the first firework lights up the sky, casting a green glow on his face. “I just realized I’ve never kissed anyone on New Years Eve before…”

“Well, I’m honoured to be the first,” Jayce whispers, reaching out to draw Viktor in by placing a hand on his jaw. He doesn’t have to do much because Viktor goes willingly, meeting his lips gradually, barely a brush of skin at first. The sound of the fireworks is dim in the distance and Viktor has the faintest flashes of colour behind his closed lids. Jayce tastes of champagne and French onion dip but Viktor doesn’t care, he probably tastes equally as flattering. 

Jayce’s calloused fingers comb through his hair to cup the back of his skull, his other hand wrapping around his waist. Viktor shifts closer, hooking his arms onto Jayce’s neck, and tilting his head to the side to deepen the kiss. As the fireworks crescendo, Jayce pulls Viktor into his lap, his tongue meeting Viktor’s with urgency. 

“Wait,” Viktor says, breaking the kiss before nodding to the floor. “This isn’t going to be comfortable.”

“Let’s fix that.” 

Putting a pillow on either side of Jayce’s thighs as padding for his knees, Viktor then straddles him after he’s discarded his pyjama pants and underwear. The sky is long since dark when they begin to make out languidly, pushing clothes out of the way to touch and explore one another’s bodies. Even though they have each other mapped out by now, Viktor finds something new to appreciate every time, like a small birthmark on Jayce’s right shoulder that he never noticed before. It isn’t long before Jayce’s hardness through his sweatpants is pressing against Viktor’s bare cunt, making him shudder with want.

“Enough foreplay, I want you inside me,” Viktor finally says after he’s completely undressed with the exception of his socks.

“Wait, shouldn’t I get a condom?”

“I’m taking Plan B anyway.”

Jayce nods and shoves down his sweatpants as far as he can while Viktor stands on his knees. When Viktor sinks down on Jayce’s length, he gasps from the feeling of his skin inside him again. God, I don’t want to go back to using condoms after this… kurva, I should’ve known this was a bad idea. Despite his reservations, he decides to enjoy it while it lasts. 

It feels significant that Jayce is his only for a lot of things. The only man he’s allowed to stay over. The only man he’s brushed his teeth next to. The only man he’s kissed on New Year’s Eve. Now, the only man he’s ever had unprotected sex with. How many more firsts is he going to claim from me? 

Viktor rides Jayce slowly and sensually, wanting their meeting of bodies to last as long as possible. He’s going to savour every inch of him, their messy kisses, and Jayce’s rough palms caressing his bare back and thigh. At some point, Jayce splays his hand between them against Viktor’s pelvis and begins to rub his cock in slow circles with his thumb. It makes Viktor moan and arch his back in a way that his spine isn’t going to agree with later, but that’s a tomorrow-Viktor problem.  

When he comes, he does so while clinging to Jayce, his arms wrapped around his shoulders with a nearly bruising grip and hiding his face in the crook of Jayce’s neck. “I got you, baby,” Jayce whispers soothingly as he trembles in the wake of his orgasm. Lying back, Jayce takes Viktor with him, so Viktor no longer has to do any work and Jayce can just leverage the floor to buck upwards into him. The sounds they make together are lewd and Viktor feels like his insides are on fire from the heat and friction of Jayce’s cock. 

There’s no attempt to pull out this time. Jayce fills him up with his seed when he comes with a groan, and the flames inside him are sated by the sensation. Fuck, that feels so good… Viktor relaxes into Jayce’s embrace while the other man rubs his back soothingly, taking deep breaths to recover. Pulling back a little, Viktor has a sudden need that if he doesn’t kiss Jayce now he might wither away and die. 

Jayce seems taken aback when Viktor presses a firm kiss to his lips, but he quickly eases into it and returns the kiss with tenderness. It’s slow, methodical and intentional, while Viktor brushes a hand over Jayce’s hair. They kiss for what feels like hours but could have only been a minute, and as Viktor’s hand follows the curve of Jayce’s face from his hair to his cheek, he pauses when he feels a wetness against his palm. Retreating, Viktor looks down at him to see tears streaming down Jayce’s temples, and he looks a little embarrassed that Viktor caught him.

“S-Sorry,” Jayce murmurs, reaching up to wipe away some of the tears with his knuckle.

Cradling Jayce’s face, Viktor whispers, “Don’t be sorry. What’s wrong?”

“It’s… right now is a hard time in my life. I won’t get into it but… I appreciate you being here.” 

Viktor analyzes Jayce’s words, turning them over in his head like a Rubik’s cube he’s trying to solve. He got invited to parties and didn’t want to go. He goes to his Mom’s for Christmas. Snow gives him anxiety. Something happened around this time that has stuck with him… maybe it has to do with his dad? “I’m glad to be here,” Viktor finally says quietly, deciding to kiss Jayce again rather than say anything else. 

Jayce isn’t his boyfriend. They aren’t even dating. But there’s meaning to their connection. It’s a companionship Viktor has never felt with an intimate partner, even with Charlie, his fuck buddy from college. They were friends but in truth, Viktor was just using him as a distraction from losing his mom, because after abandoning alcohol as a coping mechanism, he went to the next best thing: sex. Jayce is so much more than that, though.

If I let myself have this, I could maybe have him, a wistful part of Viktor thinks. But, he’s not willing to take that risk—to give someone his heart on a gamble that they won’t break it. Besides, Jayce said he wasn’t looking for a boyfriend, and Viktor will respect that. Greedily, he’ll take whatever Jayce gives him to fill the hollowness in his chest cavity until Jayce doesn’t want him anymore or finds something better. He’s a passing ship that has anchored for the time being and I need to accept that.

After Jayce is entirely soft and slipping out of his pussy, Viktor finally rolls off of Jayce, lying on the barely cushioned floor. “Ow. My back and leg are going to be killing me tomorrow.”

Jayce looks at him curiously and cautiously asks, “Do you… mind if I ask about your disability?”

“Not really. Figured it’d come up eventually,” Viktor shrugs as he turns his head to look back at Jayce. “I have femoral anteversion meaning—”

“Your femur is rotated inward at the hip joint, right?”

Viktor stares at him, raising one brow with interest. “How do you know that?”

“I’m, um, familiar with medical things. How much is it rotated?”

Is he really a medical doctor? “Fifty degrees. It was sixty when I was born so it never corrected itself much.”

“So, your back—scoliosis from the overcompensation on the left side?”

“I… yeah, you got it right,” Viktor blinks at him, surprised Jayce figured out that much. “Moderate, fortunately. I’ve managed to keep it from getting too severe. The pain in my hip is the most intense but my knee is pretty bad too. With my femur rotated so much, my hip can’t provide the needed support for walking. Even with my crutch, it causes strain on my back. I have had regular physical therapy to keep it from getting worse since I was like ten.”

“I can’t imagine how painful riding is for you, then.”

“In the moment the pleasure distracts from the pain but, yeah, I usually pay for it the next day.”

“I hope you don’t feel like you have to—”

“Jayce, I don’t. I’m an adult, I know my body and the results of my choices. I will tell you if it gets to be too much,” Viktor reassures, reaching up to brush a lock of hair out of Jayce’s face as he smirks. “I’ve never regretted riding your cock, don’t worry.”

Huffing out a laugh, Jayce asks, “Regretting not using that condom?”

“Eh… I probably will tomorrow, but not really. I don’t know if you’ve ever been creampied but it feels really good, which is a dangerous discovery for me.”

“No, I haven’t been creampied,” Jayce grins sheepishly, lying on his side with his head propped up. “What does it feel like?”

“Um… it kind of feels like when you cut open a lava cake but inside my pussy,” Viktor snorts.

“Wait, you said ‘dangerous discovery’… you mean, you’ve never…?”

“I, uh… yeah. I’ve never had unprotected sex before.”

Jayce goes bug-eyed and a flush creeps up his neck. “Oh, I didn’t know… I’m sorry it kinda ended in disaster.”

“Eh… shit happens. I had fun and it’s fixable, that’s what matters.”

“How you feeling tired-wise?”

Viktor blinks, suddenly noticing that his limbs and eyelids feel heavy. “I think I’m ready for bed,” he admits. Sitting up, Viktor grabs the Plan B pill from his pyjama pants pocket and opens the blister pack. Picking up the champagne glass with a swig left in it, he lifts it to cheers. “To taking Plan B butt ass naked on your condo floor in the first hour of 2020.”

Jayce laughs, sitting up and picking up his own glass before clinking his with Viktor’s. “I’ll cheers to that.”

They both drink the rest of their champagne, the little white tablet going down with Viktor’s. 

“Can I carry you to the bathroom so I can clean you up?” Jayce offers, his eyes honest and caring. It makes warmth bloom in Viktor’s stomach, like a cocoon of butterflies just opened.

“I can do it—”

“We went over this last week, Vik. Please, let me take care of you. You’re already going to be in a lot of pain.” 

Sighing, Viktor nods. As promised, Jayce picks him up and carries him bridal-style to the bathroom, trading languid kisses as he does. Jayce’s stupid glass walls make the heat retention terrible in his bedroom, so Viktor decides to dress in his pyjama pants and t-shirt again.

When they make it to bed, they continue to kiss and touch, without the intention of sex. It reminds Viktor of the first time they hooked up, when Jayce just wanted to make out before he left. After what might have been twenty minutes of licking, biting and kissing, Viktor breaks the kiss to let out a yawn. “Sorry, you tired me out,” he chuckles quietly.

“No need to be sorry, I think it’s about time we call it a night,” Jayce says before pressing one more kiss to his lips. Settling behind Viktor, chest to back, Jayce wraps an arm around Viktor’s middle. This is new. They’ve cuddled but Jayce hasn’t spooned him to sleep before this. It’s… nice. Kissing his shoulder, Jayce whispers against his skin, “Night, Vik.” 

“Night,” Viktor replies, placing a hand over Jayce’s that’s firmly holding his stomach. I adore you, is what he wants to say, but he’s not brave enough to admit it. Within minutes, he drifts to sleep, warm and safe in Jayce’s arms.

Viktor doesn’t know what time it is due to Jayce’s black-out curtains, but what he does know is something’s wrong. There’s a sharp pain in his abdomen and a sour taste is on the back of his tongue, filling his throat in warning. Reaching out for his crutch desperately, Viktor climbs out of bed and rushes to the bathroom. Immediately, he drops to his knees along with his crutch, hearing it clatter against the tile, ignoring the ache in his leg as he opens the toilet seat and vomits. 

“Vik?” Jayce enters the bathroom moments later, voice heavy with sleep, still only wearing his boxer briefs and sounding concerned. “Oh, shit is it the—”

“Yeah, probably,” Viktor manages to say, grimacing at the offending taste clinging to his tongue. He still feels nauseous but at least not enough to vomit again, so he shuts the lid and flushes the toilet. Jayce turns the light on and immediately Viktor recoils, a burning pain manifesting behind his eyes. Covering them urgently with one hand, Viktor waves at Jayce with the other. “Žádná světla—no lights, Jayce.”

“Fuck, sorry.” 

Viktor hears the click of the light switch and slowly opens his eyes again. “I don’t think I can drive home, at least not right now.”

“That’s fine, just stay,” Jayce offers, kneeling to rub a hand over Viktor’s shoulder. “I’ll take care of you until you feel well enough—”

“It’s fine, I can just Uber—”

“You know that’s impractical. I’d either have to come pick you up tomorrow to come back to get your car, or you’d have to Uber back here. Don’t waste like a hundred bucks when you can just chill here until you’re feeling better.”

“I don’t want to intrude, Jayce,” Viktor frowns, pushing his hair out of his face.

“You’re not. I’ve got no plans. If you’re sick of me, feel free to tell me. But, I enjoy your company so it would be very welcome.” Jayce’s eyes are as honest as they’ve always been—Viktor would believe the man has never told him even a white lie.

Smiling faintly, Viktor says, “Okay. As long as you’re fine with me staying in bed and being miserable.”

“Fine by me. I’ll go get you some water, Advil and Gravol. Why don’t I help you up first?”

“I can—”

“I know you can, I’m offering to be kind,” Jayce says firmly, standing and holding out his hand.

Viktor undoubtedly has a stubborn expression on his face by the way he frowns and pinches his brows, but he accepts Jayce’s hand. He grabs his crutch in the other as the larger man pulls him up easily, a little unsteady on his feet. 

“You gonna be okay while I get you stuff?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’m just going to brush my teeth and get back in bed,” Viktor grimaces, rubbing his head as another wave of pain accompanied by some lightheadedness comes. “What time is it anyway?”

“It’s just after seven.”

“Ugh. Yeah, it’s too early for me to be awake, I’m just going to go back to sleep.”

“Is Rio going to be alright with you staying here?”

“Yeah, she won’t be happy about not having wet breakfast but she’ll graze on kibble instead.”

“Alright. I’ll be right back.” 

Viktor hums in acknowledgment before brushing his teeth. By the time he’s done and returning to bed, Jayce has a glass of water and two pills sitting on the table next to where Viktor had been sleeping. Despite the time, Jayce is already getting dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a muscle shirt. “You’re getting up?”

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be able to go back to sleep. I’m gonna go to the gym, it’s just a couple floors up, but I’ll be back in like an hour. You gonna be fine here?”

“Yeah, I’m just going to pass out. I won’t miss you,” he teases lightly before taking the pills, drinking half the glass, then getting back in bed in the same pyjamas and t-shirt he had already been sleeping in.

“I think you’ll miss me at least a little.”

“I’ll be asleep, so no.” Jayce actually pouts and Viktor just rolls his eyes. “I’ll miss your body heat, at least.”

“I’ll take it. I’m gonna make coffee when I come back so that and pastries will be waiting for you when you get up.”

Viktor spreads out in the king bed, relaxing into the comfortable mattress—not as comfortable as his own. “Would you be appalled if I asked if I could eat in your bed?” 

“Not at all. Just let me know when you’re up,” Jayce smiles earnestly, approaching to lean down and kiss Viktor on the forehead. The small sign of affection makes his stomach twitch with nervousness because he doesn’t know what to do with such kindness. “Feel better, Vik.”

“Thanks, Jay,” Viktor says, resurfacing the nickname he had uttered last night while they were having sex on the couch. It feels weird to say it, but appropriate, and Jayce gives him a gentle smile in reply while brushing a hand over his hair. 

When Jayce leaves, Viktor realizes he misses more than his warmth. His residual heat clings to the sheets and Viktor switches sides of the bed just to indulge in it. It’s a comfort while he’s feeling like shit. 

Sleep takes him and he has no concept for how long. At one point, he hazily hears the shower in the ensuite bathroom but quickly returns to his slumber. When he wakes up fully, he groggily rolls over to grab his phone from the nightstand. The clock reads 10:22 and, while the cramps and nausea have subsided, his head is still in a fragile state. The blackout curtains are doing him a big favour, making it so he has no desire to leave Jayce’s bedroom. 

Opening his texts with Jayce, he quickly sends a message, not bothering with proper grammar for once.

V ❤️‍🔥
I’m awake
can you bring me coffee and pastries
please
I’ll blow you in exchange

J
good morning
happy to oblige 🌹
no bj required

A minute later the door opens and Jayce is balancing a coffee cup and a small plate with a croissant and a danish while he slides open the barn door. Setting them down on the nightstand as he sits on the bed, Jayce asks, “Hey, how you feeling?”

“Cramps aren’t as bad but my head still hurts. Nausea is gone for now at least,” Viktor says as he sits up and leans back against the plush headboard. “Thank you for bringing me breakfast.”

“It’s no problem. Can I do anything?” 

Viktor chews on his bottom lip, debating if he’s willing to ask more of Jayce. He’s already doing him a favour by letting him stay and feeding him, and while Viktor doesn’t want to leave the dark room, he wants Jayce to stick around. “Could you… keep me company?” 

“Sure, you want me to keep the curtains closed?”

“You can crack one of them open but not much.”

“Alright,” Jayce nods, crossing the room to just barely open the farthest curtain to dimly illuminate the room. Jayce climbs in bed, on top of the covers, and sits next to Viktor against the headboard, just as Viktor takes a sip of his coffee.

“What is this?” Viktor asks as he wrinkles his nose. “Is this a flavoured medium roast?”

“Uh, yeah. Vanilla hazelnut. I got it at Target. Is there something wrong with it?”

“I’m a coffee snob. It’s… fine. I prefer mediocre coffee over no coffee.”

“What’s your go-to?”

“This is going to sound incredibly pretentious but… I buy whole beans from my favourite café that also roasts beans in-house.”

“Oh, you are a coffee snob,” Jayce chuckles. “Hopefully the pastries aren’t as disappointing.”

“Let’s see what one of Piltover’s best bakeries has to offer,” Viktor comments before picking up the chocolate croissant. It’s folded and layered perfectly, thick, crisp and golden brown with coarse sugar on top. Taking a generous bite, he chews on the buttery pastry, finding the chocolate in the centre perfectly bittersweet. “Okay, I admit, that’s a pretty good croissant.”

“Glad that gets your approval at least.” Viktor continues to eat the croissant in relative quiet, just enjoying Jayce’s company. After a minute of comfortable silence while Jayce checks his phone, he says, “You mind if I read something?”

“No, go ahead.” Viktor nods, continuing to silently eat and drink his coffee, the headache gradually easing. Opening the other nightstand, Jayce retrieves a book from the bottom drawer. Peering over curiously, Viktor reads the title of the book that looks brand new: Red, White & Royal Blue. His interest piqued, Viktor asks, “What are you reading?”

“Oh, well, about to read. I haven’t started it yet. It’s a gay romance about the son of the fictional American president and a fictional British prince. Apparently, it’s a bit of an enemies-to-lovers story.”

“Oh.” For some reason, I wasn’t expecting Jayce to be the type to read romance novels. Then again, he likes Love Actually… “That sounds… really interesting. As you’ve seen, I enjoy romance novels.”

“What do you look for in a romance novel?”

“I’ll practically read anything, from the trashy to the classics. I like a lot of tropes, like enemies-to-lovers or professional romances.”

“What do you mean by professional romances?”

“Like, colleagues. Two detectives falling in love while hunting a serial killer or… two engineers who fall in love as they invent together. That kind of thing.”

“Are those real books?”

“I think so.”

Pausing while furrowing his brow, Jayce then asks, “Do princes and first sons count as colleagues?”

Raising a single brow in thought, Viktor takes a moment to consider the question. “If you squint?” 

“Are you… interested in reading it?”

Viktor tries to appear as indifferent as possible, but in truth, he’s rather excited to talk about, and maybe even read, a gay romance novel with his fuck buddy. 

The only person I have to talk to about romance is Sky because Pow hates it, but I don’t think I’ve ever talked about gay romance with a man before. All the assholes I dated thought that was ‘girly shit’ or something equally as homophobic and misogynistic. That’s what I get for having ‘meathead douchebag’ as my type. 

“I am. Would you… mind reading to me?”

“Not at all,” Jayce says with a soft smile before he pushes his glasses up on his nose and opens the book. “On the White House roof, tucked into a corner of the Promenade…”

Viktor finishes his croissant, danish and coffee as he listens and, once he’s done, he eventually ends up cuddling with Jayce. The other man continues to read aloud while Viktor rests his head on Jayce’s shoulder, holding onto his arm with both of his own. Viktor is able to pay attention for roughly an hour before he begins to feel drowsy. Jayce is warm and comfortable, and something about him makes Viktor feel so safe. His gentle voice easily lulls him to sleep, and the world just fades away.

Viktor has no idea how long it’s been, but it’s at least still light out so he could have only slept an hour. He’s still holding Jayce’s arm, who is quietly snoring while his head rests on Viktor’s. His headache is gone, the cramps now a dull pain, and Viktor feels more himself than he did when he woke up earlier. The book is abandoned in Jayce’s lap, and his broad hand is resting on his stomach, rising and falling steadily. I want to stay like this for a little longer, Viktor thinks, so he shuts his eyes again. He dozes for a little while until Jayce stirs, making the cutest sounds while he rouses, like whispered sighs and heavy yawns. 

“Hey,” Viktor greets sleepily, pulling away finally and rubbing his eyes. 

“Hey sleepyhead,” Jayce replies with a gravelly voice, a handsome smile stretched on his lips.

“I’m not the only one,” Viktor huffs, playfully shoving Jayce’s arm but with barely any force behind it. Grabbing his phone from the table, Viktor sees it’s already almost 2 pm. Fuck. I’m feeling better now… I guess it’s time to leave. Sighing, he says, “I’m sure I’ve overstayed my welcome and I’m feeling a little more human.”

“Not at all,” Jayce shakes his head, placing his hand on Viktor’s shoulder. Suddenly… Jayce’s stomach growls, loudly. With slight embarrassment, he chuckles. “I’m starving. Have lunch with me?”

Raising a brow, Viktor gazes at Jayce with scrutiny. I really should go home… but, I’d like to take the excuse to hang out with him longer. I can’t act eager either, so… “Depends on what’s for lunch.”

“McDonald’s?” Jayce grins, referencing their conversation from last night.

“Okay, I do usually get McDonald’s on New Year's Day, but always for breakfast.”

“All day breakfast?”

“They don’t serve hash browns after eleven and that’s half the point of McDonald’s breakfast!” Viktor exclaims like it’s a ridiculous suggestion, waving his hands in the air and… Jayce laughs wholeheartedly. He blinks in confusion, dropping his hands lazily. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing. You’re just adorable.”

“What? Why?”

“I think it’s cute how opinionated you are.” 

“I… well, I’m a man of conviction, if nothing else,” Viktor says, a flush reaching his cheeks. “To answer your question, yes, I would have McDonald’s.”

“Good. I could go for a trashy cheeseburger.”

“Would you share chicken nuggets with me? I want them but I never eat them all.”

“Hell yeah. What nugget sauce?”

“I like honey.”

“Really? Man, I haven’t eaten nuggets with honey since I was a kid. I usually go for barbecue.”

“You do seem like a man who would love his barbecue.”

“Guilty. I’d have one but balcony barbecues are illegal.”

“Admittedly… they make me nervous. I don’t exactly love cooking on an open flame.”

“One day, when I have a backyard, I’ll make you some barbecue. My mom has one so in the summer I go over and make elotes and carne asada.” 

“And when will that be?” Viktor teases, raising a brow. “You say that like I will know you when you’re married with kids or something.”

“Maybe,” Jayce shrugs. “We could remain friends after fucking each other senseless for however long.”

“Oh, we’re friends, are we? Since when?”

“I dunno, but we hang out. Doesn’t that count for something?”

“I guess so. Depends on if your future spouse minds you being friends with an old fuck buddy.”

“I don’t think I’d marry them if they’re jealous of my past,” Jayce shrugs before reaching over to grab his phone. “Anyway, let’s order.”

Viktor doesn’t know how, but it’s like time blinks away when he’s with Jayce. They talk and eat, and Viktor learns more about Jayce than he ever planned on knowing. His favourite bands— Powder would like him because he listed My Chemical Romance. His bucket list— the man is such a sap, one of the items was ‘get married’. Even a story of a cottage trip he and his parents took when he was eight where he had his first kiss with a redheaded girl named Cass. Viktor, embarrassingly, admitted he didn’t kiss a boy until he was eighteen—and he was drunk so he barely even remembers it. Then suddenly, the sun is beginning to set, which cues Viktor into realizing he should really go home. “Rio is going to be very upset if she misses dinner too, so I have to get going.”

Jayce sighs heavily from where he’s lying on his side, head propped up by his hand. They spent all day in bed and their McDonald’s garbage is still sitting at the foot of the bed in the takeout bag. “That sucks but, you are a doting father, I can’t keep you hostage all day.”

Chuckling, Viktor says, “This was fun, though. Thanks for… not just the orgasms, but a nice New Year’s. I was honestly just planning on sitting at home alone then going to bed at 10 pm.” 

“Yeah, I usually do something similar. Like I said, I appreciated your company.”

“Anytime.”

Viktor takes his time putting on his braces so he’s a little more steady on his way home, especially since his body is aching from the overly strenuous sex they had last night. Once his things are packed and he’s dressed again, Viktor lingers at the front door. “So… I’ll probably see you next week?”

“Yeah,” Jayce gives him a small grin, before nervously continuing. “And, hey, uh… if you end up picking up the book, I’d love to like… read it together? Like our own personal book club.”

Viktor studies Jayce and weighs his options. Now we’re starting a book club? I mean, I do want to finish the book, but… is this a step too far? “I’ll let you know if I do,” Viktor replies, trying to remain aloof to the benefit of hiding how much he loves the idea. 

“Alright. Drive safe. I’ll see you later.” Leaning in, Jayce plants a kiss on Viktor’s forehead. 

Heat pools in Viktor’s cheeks, and he avoids Jayce’s eyes as he stammers, “R-Right. Um, Happy New Year. Bye, Jayce.” Viktor hears Jayce return the sentiment but doesn’t stick around to fully appreciate it. He walks as fast as his aching legs can carry him and waits until he’s finally seated in the driver seat of his sedan to fully analyze what just happened.

I got flustered at a forehead kiss? What is wrong with me? The man came inside me twice in the last twenty-four hours and that’s what gets me worked up? Taking a few deep breaths, Viktor tries to rationalize with himself. I’m just… touch-starved and he’s being sweet. It doesn’t mean anything.

Looking over at his phone in the centre console, he picks it up and opens Amazon. Normally he would go out to buy his books, but nothing is open today and he wants the book sooner, rather than later, so Jayce doesn’t get too far ahead of him. Once he’s ordered it, he goes to put his phone down but pauses.

Some music couldn’t hurt…

Viktor ends up driving home to the melodies of Fleetwood Mac with the words ‘I’m lonely too’ echoing in his head.

Thursday 8:39 PM

J 🌹
where u at now?

V ❤️‍🔥
260
They snuck out to swim.

J 🌹
i’m almost there
wait for me?

V ❤️‍🔥
Sure.

J 🌹
omg
“the lines of him are long and languid in the moonlight, just skin and skin and skin, lit soft and blue, and he’s so beautiful…”
gay

V ❤️‍🔥
I particularly like the line that follows.
“There are fireflies winking around his head, landing in his hair. A crown.”

J 🌹
i like that too
i want to go skinny dipping with u

V ❤️‍🔥
Good luck finding somewhere to do that.

J 🌹
chapter is almost over
reconvene at the end?

V ❤️‍🔥
Yes.

8:52 PM

J 🌹
SCREAMING

V ❤️‍🔥
‼‼‼

Chapter Text

Friday, Valentine’s Day, 2020

Monday 5:58 PM

J 🌹
any plans for v-day?

V ❤️‍🔥
What kind of question is that? You know I don’t.  

J 🌹
then i’d like to buy u dinner
and hook up obv

V ❤️‍🔥
I’m not going on a date with you.

J 🌹
not a date
just takeout

V ❤️‍🔥
I suppose I can agree to that.
I want Chinese.

J 🌹
figured u would
6? ur place?

V ❤️‍🔥
Make it 6:30.
Don’t be late.

J 🌹
i would never 😇

Viktor doesn’t prepare anything for their hook up. In the last month, Viktor has ditched trying to be sexually appealing because he knows Jayce is going to fuck him either way. So, for that reason, he’s just wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and an old Zaun U shirt he bought probably ten years ago. Jayce is usually punctual, so when there’s a knock at Viktor’s door at 6:32 pm, he can’t help but put on a teasing grin. “You’re late,” he says as he opens the door.

Jayce is standing there, handsome as can be, still wearing a pink dress shirt and black slacks plus his overcoat. Clearly, he came directly from work and, for some reason, he’s carrying a heart-shaped box of chocolates. “Two minutes is hardly late,” he returns the grin.

Viktor arches a brow at the box. “Is that for me?”

“It’s for us. On sale at the CVS next to my office.”

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head, stepping aside to let Jayce inside. “Are you hungry?”

“Mm… not quite. I had a late lunch,” Jayce says as he gets comfortable, tossing the box of chocolates on the bench by the door. He shrugs off his coat, hangs it, and unties his shoes. As soon as he’s settled, Viktor sets his crutch against the wall, looping his arms around Jayce’s neck. 

“Carry me?” Viktor asks, brushing his finger over the nape of Jayce’s neck, knowing he’s sensitive there. 

“You love that, don’t you?” Jayce grins, shivering a little from the contact, before crouching slightly to hook his hands under the backs of Viktor’s thighs. Hoisting him up, Jayce starts to carry Viktor towards the bedroom.

“What can I say? It’s a turn on,” Viktor replies before closing the distance between them to capture Jayce’s lips. He knows Jayce can navigate his house by now, so he has no concerns about him running into a wall or something while they make out. 

The hook up itself goes as well as it always does. Jayce bends him over on his pillow, eats him out and fucks him into oblivion like it’s his sworn duty. Over their last few hookups, Jayce has started to call him ‘baby’ during sex, which Viktor doesn’t… hate. If he’s being honest, he actually likes it, just as he likes that Jayce sometimes dissolves into speaking exclusively Spanish when he’s close. It makes him feel special. Viktor can’t help but wonder if Jayce calls all of his casual hookups ‘baby’, though.

As he usually does, Viktor curls up next to Jayce and rests his head on his chest while he’s coming down from his orgasm. Jayce’s fingers comb through his hair while he opens the Chinese restaurant they’ve ordered from before on his phone and Viktor almost falls asleep before Jayce speaks. “You want your usual?” 

Viktor hums in affirmation, absentmindedly drawing circles over Jayce’s heart. He forgets himself again, and in the haze of the afterglow he pretends there’s something more between them. It’s a nice fantasy he indulges in, one Jayce will never know about. It’s especially prominent tonight because it’s only the most romantic holiday of the year, one Viktor has never cared for in the past. “What’s your favourite romance movie?” He asks, the desire to get to know Jayce more overpowering his practical ‘I don’t get to know my hookups’ policy. However, that faltered months ago.

“Shit, that’s a good question,” Jayce sighs in thought, presumably ordering their dinner. “I like Pride and Prejudice a lot, but my favourite might be 10 Things I Hate About You. What about you?”

“Mm, Pride and Prejudice is good. I like the book too. I think my favourite might be When Harry Met Sally.”

“I don’t think I’ve seen it. That’s the movie with that one scene where she’s faking an orgasm in a restaurant, right?”

“Yeah. We should watch it,” Viktor says, not realizing what he’s suggesting.

“You wanna? Tonight?” 

Viktor’s brain catches up to what he just implied. Eating food together for the sake of feeding themselves and Jayce sleeping over is one thing, but explicitly hanging out is starting to become a reoccurrence. It’s another threshold in the relationship that Viktor had been determined not to cross because he might delude himself further. Despite his rational side screaming at him to say no, he says, “Sure. Why not?”

“You got some PJs or something I can steal? Don’t really wanna watch in either my underwear or my work clothes.”

“Why are you assuming I’d have anything that fits you?”

“I noticed you live exclusively in clothes two or three sizes bigger.”

“You do realize half of my closet is business wear, right?”

“I mean, yeah, other than that. You work an office job, right?”

“Sort of. You’ll never know. To answer your question… yes, I probably have something that will fit you.”

Viktor gets Jayce his loosest pair of sweatpants and a worn blue t-shirt that are both strained in a battle against Jayce’s physique. Minutes later, they find the movie on Netflix and settle into the couch. Rio sits in Viktor’s lap while they watch and it’s nice… normal. When the doorbell rings, Jayce gets it and brings back the food. Not bothering with plates as usual, they just use chopsticks and eat out of the takeout boxes, chatting about the movie as they watch. Occasionally they pause and end up ranting about how Harry and Sally are so oblivious about their feelings. How could they not know they’re in love? 

Viktor isn’t sure how, but at some point, they changed positions. It started with Jayce’s arm over the back of the couch, then with Viktor leaning against him. Now they’ve migrated with Jayce lying down and Viktor lying on top of him, his head to Jayce’s chest.

The movie ends and neither of them want it to be over, plus they have chocolate to eat, so they turn on 10 Things I Hate About You because Viktor hasn’t seen it since he was a teenager. Viktor hates the pralines, which Jayce loves, and Jayce hates the fruit creams, which Viktor loves. They split the caramels though and everything just seems to… fit together. 

It’s only midnight when they finish the second movie so… they decide to watch Pride and Prejudice too. Halfway through, Viktor starts kissing Jayce’s neck, which leads to making out, which leads to fucking on the couch again. Most of the time they default to missionary, just because it’s the most comfortable for Viktor. However, Viktor suspects Jayce likes it so he can easily continue making out with him. 

In the last five months, Viktor has guessed that Jayce’s love language is touch. Not to say they’re lovers, just that Jayce seems to express his feelings through sex. He always wants to be touching, feeling, kissing, and Viktor’s never had a more affectionate bed partner. Jayce has been this way the entire time they’ve been hooking up, but as the months go on, it’s gotten more intense and more often than not Jayce is kissing him endlessly while fucking him into one surface or another. 

Viktor has learned to love it. It freaked him out at first, how good it felt to be treated with care while getting his insides rearranged. Unfortunately, sometimes, it feeds into his fantasies too. Maybe it would be nice if Jayce was my boyfriend and this was our average Friday night. It’s a pleasant thought, a dangerous one, that he tries not to soak in for too long.

The movie was forgotten and is over by the time they’re done ravaging each other. There are welts on Jayce’s back and purple bruises spread out from Viktor’s collarbone to his hips. The satisfaction is bone deep when Jayce carries him bridal-style to the bathroom to get ready, not because Viktor asked but because he knows Viktor’s legs are jelly right now. They do their normal routine before Jayce, yet again, carries him to bed. Viktor was reluctant to let him do it outside of sex at first, but he’s come to enjoy it. Lazy kisses are exchanged on the way, and in bed, before eventually Viktor is the one to spoon Jayce to sleep. He’s pretty sure it was an impulse the first time it happened, but they both liked it so… Viktor keeps doing it.

The next morning, he feels hazy. Good orgasms and back to back movies can do that to you. It’s almost like a hangover, a slight headache lingering, and he knows a shower will help. Jayce stirs when Viktor rolls over to face him. His fuck buddy is lying on his back, arms thrown across his stomach and next to his head on the pillow, and opens his bleary eyes to look at Viktor with a soft smile.

“Morning, beautiful,” Jayce murmurs, because that’s something he regularly calls Viktor now. It makes butterflies twitch in his stomach. What if I could have this all the time? 

There are the delusions again.

“Morning, handsome,” Viktor returns because he started doing it too. It’s just the truth, Jayce is probably the most handsome man to ever grace his bed, which is saying something about Jayce because Viktor has always been able to pull attractive men. But, maybe he’s biassed too because he thinks Jayce is literally the whole package—kind, considerate, smart, funny, passionate and, last but certainly not least, has a big dick he knows how to use.

He’s going to make someone very happy one day.

The thought makes his chest clench painfully, but he tries to smother the feeling while Jayce kisses him lazily. His mouth moves to the side of Viktor’s neck then down to his shoulders where dark purple bruises have blossomed. Groaning, Viktor says, “I need a shower before I go again.”

“How would you feel about fucking in the shower then?” Jayce murmurs, his broad hand running from his collarbone all the way to his pelvis. 

Viktor sighs from the feeling, thinking about it. He hasn’t had shower sex in… well, he can’t remember the last time. Maybe it would be nice. “I have a bench in my shower. If I put a towel down I could kneel on it.”

“I could also hold you up against the wall so you don’t have to do any of the work.” 

It’s not the first time they’ve had sex against a wall and it won’t be the last. Viktor secretly loves it because, yeah, it’s easy for him. Admittedly, he likes being a pillow prince sometimes. It’s a nice reprieve from real life where he has to be self-reliant, hard working, and constantly stressed—why work hard in the bedroom too when he can get a service top to do it all? “That sounds much better.”

“Why don’t I prep you in here? Would be easier.”

“Smart man.”

Jayce takes him apart with his fingers, slow and gentle. While he usually doesn’t have the patience for it, Viktor lies back and enjoys it because he’s still half asleep. However, Jayce gets a little carried away and starts going beyond the necessary preparation. 

“Keep going and I’m not going to be able to do anything in the shower,” Viktor rasps, tapping Jayce’s shoulder. He’s three fingers deep, rubbing against Viktor’s g-spot, while making a new bruise on his hip bone. 

Retracting his fingers, Jayce sits up and licks them clean, and Viktor loves how enthusiastic Jayce is about tasting him. It’s one of the sexiest things about him. He’s been with one too many men who said they don’t do oral but still expected a blowjob. 

Jayce gets out of Viktor’s bed then scoops him up, and Viktor lets it happen. If any other man carried him this often, he would assume he was treating him like he was incapable of getting around on his own. But, Jayce knows he likes it for horny reasons and Viktor knows Jayce likes it just the same. He gets off on their size difference and the fact that he can carry Viktor like he weighs nothing. If he really wanted to get around on his own, Jayce would be hands off and respect his independence. I like that about him.

The showering together thing is new. Viktor is half expecting Jayce to get out after he fucks him against the shower wall, but other than discarding the condom, he doesn’t. Jayce even asks if he can wash him and Viktor hesitates. It feels so intimate, but he’s greedy and starved for affection, so he agrees. 

Jayce kneels while Viktor sits on his bench, and he gently rubs the wash cloth down his thigh. Viktor realizes it’s… maybe the most romantic moment they’ve had. It makes his heart flutter with want. The delusional part of him is winning because when Jayce is done, Viktor is unable to resist the sudden urge to grab his face and kiss him. It’s languid, passionate, and Viktor forgets himself as Jayce’s hands tangle in his hair and cup the side of his neck. 

“I already had you this morning, but I want you again,” Jayce murmurs between heated kisses, moving his hand from Viktor’s neck to skirt up his thigh.

“Bed,” is all Viktor says in reply, breaking the kiss entirely. Jayce helps him stand, just to be a gentleman, and they rinse off the remainder of the suds. When the shower is off, Jayce grabs a large, fluffy towel and begins to dry Viktor’s hair while he holds onto Jayce to remain steady. 

Five minutes later they’re back in bed, skin still warm from the shower, leisurely making out. Viktor is on top this time, rolling his hips so his pussy lips rub against Jayce’s growing erection. 

“Shouldn’t you… with your brace…?” Jayce murmurs between kisses, grabbing Viktor’s ass to pull him impossibly closer. 

“Shut up,” Viktor chastises, licking into Jayce’s mouth eagerly. He can already feel Jayce getting hard against him, begging to be inside him. In moments, Viktor is hastily rolling a condom on before lifting his hips and slipping Jayce inside of him, still stretched open from fucking in the shower. 

It’s a slow, lazy affair. Viktor rides him steadily despite the pain in his hip, embracing his lips hungrily. There’s residual tenderness between them, one that bloomed the moment Jayce started washing him—taking care of him. 

Viktor has been denying himself the luxury of being taken care of for nearly all of his life. Despite his close relationship with his mother, she relied on him when he was far too young. Sometimes, especially when she was sick, he felt like the parent between them. So, relying on people never felt safe. But there’s something about Jayce that makes it so easy to peel away the chitin of his layered exoskeleton. He wants to expose the hardware of his heart and let Jayce draw his own blueprints. 

Is this what infatuation feels like?

Viktor stifles the question as he focuses on the friction between their bodies. Eventually, his thighs begin to tremble with exhaustion, and Jayce gently squeezes his waist. “Hey, let me take over,” he urges, tilting his head to the side to suggest rolling over.

With a puff of a heavy breath, Viktor stops moving and nods. Jayce easily flips him on his back, giving Viktor a more comfortable position, and continues to fuck him deep and slow. Their lips meet again and don’t part until Viktor is crying with his orgasm. Jayce follows him shortly after, biting the crook of Viktor’s neck as he does. 

Rolling off of Viktor, Jayce stretches out while he catches his breath, and Viktor follows, instinctively resting his head on Jayce’s chest. They remain quiet with the exception of their breathing while Jayce plays with his hair.

“You want breakfast?” Viktor asks after he’s caught his breath, tilting his head up to look at Jayce. 

“Yeah, whatcha thinkin’?” Jayce gazes back, eyes glassy still with bliss.

“Can’t go wrong with bacon and eggs? I’ve got some sourdough too if you’re into that.”

“Love sourdough,” Jayce sighs, rubbing Viktor’s back. “Wait… you drink your coffee black. You don’t have coffee creamer, do you?”

“No. I can’t remember the last time I even bought coffee creamer,” Viktor confesses. 

“Would you be opposed if I ordered Starbucks?”

“Not as long as you get me a dark roast and one of those blueberry yogurt muffins.”

“Deal.” 

An hour later, they’re sitting at Viktor’s island, eating bacon, eggs and toast. As promised, Jayce bought Viktor a venti dark roast, while he got himself a venti mocha with oat milk. “I don’t know how you can drink that,” Viktor comments while pursing his lips. 

“Have you even tried a mocha with oat milk? I find the creaminess of the oat milk breaks through the sweetness.”

“No, I haven’t.”

Holding up his cup to Viktor, he grins. “Dare you to try.”

“You’re daring me?” Viktor asks incredulously. “What is this, middle school?”

“C’mooooon, I think only then you can give it a fair judgement.”

Wrinkling his nose, he looks between Jayce and the offending beverage. With a sigh, he picks up the cup, hesitantly lifting it to his lips. He takes the smallest sip and immediately retracts the drink, turning his head away in disgust and handing it back to Jayce. “ Ew,” Viktor seethes before reaching for his own coffee and taking several deep gulps to wash away the upsetting aftertaste. 

Jayce laughs at his suffering, but he has enough tact to say, “Sorry, sorry, I didn’t know it would be that bad for you.”

“I hate oat milk. I knew it would be awful.”

After an hour of talking and eating, Jayce finally says, “I gotta get home, unfortunately. I’m having dinner with a friend tonight and I still need to do groceries.”

There’s disappointment sinking in Viktor’s stomach because he selfishly wanted more time with Jayce. They could have watched another movie, or made out for an hour. But, reluctantly, he says, “Alright. You can keep the sweats and give them back later, by the way.”

“Thanks, I’ll wash them and return them when I see you next week,” Jayce says, though he looks embarrassed after a moment. “I mean, I assume I’ll see you next week.”

Viktor’s stomach churns with anxiety. It’s coming up. I need to enjoy this while I’m not being eaten alive by it. “Most likely, I would say.”

Walking Jayce to the door once he’s all packed up, he hovers awkwardly, waiting until Jayce has his shoes and coat on. “So, I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah,” Jayce agrees before cradling Viktor’s cheek. Unexpectedly, he leans in and kisses Viktor, sweetly though not so chaste. Cupping the nape of his neck, Viktor returns it eagerly, lips moving in a leisurely harmony. It ends too soon, and when it does, Jayce grins at him from only a couple of inches away. “See ya, Vik.”

Viktor is left stunned after Jayce is gone, staring at the closed door behind him. He… he kissed me goodbye. What the fuck? That’s like… couple shit. But I liked it. Is it maybe not weird for fuck buddies to do it?

I have no fucking clue what I’m doing anymore.

Saturday, February 22nd, 2020

“Sooo, how’d your Valentine’s Day go?” Sky asks the following weekend while they’re drinking wine and eating the pasta she made for dinner. Her husband Jax is at some hockey game with his friends so it’s just the two of them, which Viktor likes having their alone time. He doesn’t like the interrogations, though. She has a subtle smirk on her lips, like she knows.

“Fine. Nothing special. How was yours?” He says, taking a sip of his wine. This is my last drink for two weeks. For my own good.

“Don’t deflect, Vik. You spent it with the nerdy hunk, didn’t you?” 

Viktor can feel his cheeks begin to heat up at the memory but he tries to smother it. “So what if I did? We’re both single and have nothing better to do.”

Sky laughs out loud. “Single. Sure. Except you’ve been dating him since September.”

“I told you, I’m not dating him. We have… an arrangement.” 

“Uh huh. An arrangement that apparently includes cuddling and getting take-out?” She raises her brows suggestively. “C’mon, you guys didn’t get up to anything different?”

Viktor chews on his bottom lip. He tells Sky everything, but he’s worried what she’s going to say when he admits what happened. “We… watched a couple movies. And I made him breakfast.”

“Viktor Cermak… I think you officially have a boyfriend.”

“He is not my boyfriend. We just… enjoy each other’s company from time to time.” 

“Vik, I think you need to be real. You seem to like him. Like, really like him. You should consider maybe… giving dating a shot?” Sky looks at him empathetically, twirling her fork around her pasta. “I know your work is important but you can’t just neglect your personal needs and wants.”

“Who said I need or want a boyfriend?” Viktor replies stubbornly. He won’t even admit to Sky about his little fantasies he has when Jayce holds him after a good orgasm or before he falls asleep. Or, apparently now, while they watch movies and shower together. “I’ll settle down eventually. Maybe when I’m forty.”

“Okay, fine, you don’t want a boyfriend. Stubborn as a goat, as always. But, theoretically, if you did, what would he be like?” 

Viktor has never considered it. He’s never had a boyfriend. He doesn’t know what it’s like to have one or what you’re supposed to do with one, other than what he assumes in his daydreams. “Uh… I don’t know. What did you look for when you started dating Jax?”

“Well, I’ve been with Jax for so long that we got together before I even knew what I wanted. Eventually I realized everything I wanted in a husband were things I already loved about him. Kind, smart, dedicated, loyal, romantic… not to mention, good in bed,” she giggles then sighs dreamily. “Physical appearance matters less to me, but it does help that he’s also handsome as hell.”

“I do think you got lucky with him,” Viktor says, tracing the stem of his wine glass in thought. “I suppose I would want someone who is passionate and driven about their work, just like me. I don’t care what kind of work, I just don’t want to be with anyone… listless. Ideally, he could just read my mind and know what I need when I need it, but that’s impossible. He would also need to let me be independent. I don’t need an adult man hanging off of me all the time like a baby.” 

“Mhm. What about personality, though?” 

“I guess… funny, kind but not a pushover, and admittedly… romantic? I like the idea of romance in theory,” Viktor shrugs, taking a sip of wine. “Oh, and loyalty is a given. I don’t have time to fuck around with cheaters.”

“So… does your ‘casual hookup’ check any of those boxes?”

Narrowing his eyes, Viktor says, “I see what you’re doing, Young.” 

“C’mon, humour me,” she grins, leaning forward with her hands propping up her face.

“... I mean, he’s talked about being passionate about whatever he does. He doesn’t fawn over me or treat me like I’m going to break, but he does take care of me when I need it. He’s always respected when I’ve said no to hooking up or if I’ve wanted space,” Viktor admits, tapping his fingers on the tabletop. “He’s funny, even though his jokes are terrible. Kind, but I don’t know about the pushover part. And he likes romance and rom-coms, so I assume he’s romantic. I can’t say anything about loyalty though, he might be hooking up with other people and I just don’t know about it.” I should ask him that now that I have an IUD… unprotected sex could be on the table again. No, wait, I shouldn’t actually be considering that, should I?

“What if he isn’t, in theory?” 

Chewing on his bottom lip again, Viktor… entertains the idea. If, in theory, Jayce wasn’t seeing anyone else, would he even want that with him? Things have started to get blurry and Viktor can’t stop thinking about the goodbye kiss. “I’m not sure.”

“Well… maybe you should consider it? What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“I fall in love with him and then he breaks my heart by cheating or dying, or something along those lines.”

Sky frowns at that, reaching across the table to place her hand on Viktor’s. “Vik… you know death is a fact of life, right? You can’t outrun it. You are going to die. I am going to die. Powder is going to die. It’s just a matter of who goes first. But just because people are going to die, doesn’t mean you should avoid loving them.”

Viktor’s jaw tightens and his back stiffens. Slowly, he pulls his hand away from under hers, hiding it in his lap instead. “The less people I love, the less I’ll get hurt. Can we please talk about something else, now?” 

It’s clear that Sky is both hurt and worried that Viktor is pulling away like this, but she drops it. I just can’t entertain things like love more than I already have.

“I hate to bring it up but… are you going to be okay next week?” Sky asks carefully, and he bristles even further. 

“I will be fine. I’m just going to do my usual thing,” he replies tensely. 

“Are you sure you don’t want some company? We could go visit her or—”

“No, Sky. I said I’ll be fine,” Viktor repeats, though he tries to say it as calmly and kindly as possible. I know she’s just worried, but it’s overbearing sometimes… I can’t tell her I’ll be seeing Jayce, though. It will hurt her. “You didn’t tell me about your Valentine’s Day.” 

An uneasy smile crosses Sky’s face, as if she’s accepting defeat and choosing to trust Viktor’s word, however wary. The conversation moves on and Viktor tries to silence the part of his mind that is counting down the days to the anniversary.

Saturday, February 28th - Sunday, March 1st, 2020

Wednesday 8:04 PM

V ❤️‍🔥
Are you free Sunday?

J 🌹
whoa
r u ok?

V ❤️‍🔥
I’m fine. Why?

J 🌹
it’s just so rare U ask me to hook up

V ❤️‍🔥
… Is it?

J 🌹
yes
if u take one look at our msg history u can see it’s always me asking u
is everything ok?
like is there a reason?

V ❤️‍🔥
Why are you so suspicious of me wanting to have sex with you?

J 🌹
🤨
vik… 
i can tell smth is up

V ❤️‍🔥
😑
Okay, there is a reason, a reason I’m not divulging.
I just need a distraction.

J 🌹
consider me a willing distraction then

V ❤️‍🔥
One thing.
Don’t bring alcohol.
Don’t ask why.

J 🌹
🫡
do u just want me to come over on sun?
bc i’m free on sat too

V ❤️‍🔥
I’m busy Saturday but thank you for offering.

J 🌹
ok
i can stay until 8 on mon if we have breakfast together

V ❤️‍🔥
Can we get McDonald’s?

J 🌹
hell yeah 

It’s been fourteen years since Viktor’s mother died, as of tomorrow, days after her forty-third birthday. The week before and after March 1st, he avoids alcohol entirely out of fear of relapsing into old habits. He told Jayce he was busy, but in reality… he’s mourning. It’s a ritual at this point where he allows himself a day to wallow in misery and indulges in all the comforts he can think of. 

Viktor rarely sleeps past ten. He’s very particular about how much sleep he needs, which he doesn’t always achieve due to pain, working late and his brain unable to shut up for hours while he’s trying to sleep. However, when the depression hits, he sleeps as much as he can to avoid being conscious and having to think about it. So, he sleeps in until just after noon. Rio isn’t happy about it because he missed her breakfast time, but he feeds her first thing. 

The second thing he does is check his phone. He has messages from Sky and Powder, but he reads Sky’s first since it came first.

9:18 AM

Sky 💫
Hey hun. I know you like to do your own thing this time of year, but let me know if you need anything. I’m always here for you.
I miss her too. She was a great mom to have. I know she would be so proud of you.
I love you.

Viktor does his best not to cry after reading that message. It both hurts and makes him feel good at the same time—bittersweetness might be the closest thing to describing it. A single tear rolls down his cheek as he responds. 

12:20 PM

Vik 🐐
Thank you, Sky. I appreciate the offer. I just want to be alone right now.
I can only hope so.
I love you too.

Sky is only one of three people he’s ever said those three words to, and one of those people isn’t on this earth anymore. The other person he’s said it to is the only other person who texted him.

10:39 AM

Pow 🦋
hey
i know this weekend fuckin sucks
but if u need me im here for u
k?
ily bro

Powder is not a wordsmith like Sky, but the texts get to him just as much. Sometimes, he feels guilty when he leans on Powder for support. I’m practically her older brother, and older brothers are supposed to be the strong ones. But maybe that’s toxic masculinity talking. Our age gap just makes me feel like she shouldn’t have to take care of me. Swallowing down a choked sob, he replies back.

12:24 PM

Vik 🐐
Thank you, Pow.
Saying this weekend fucking sucks is an understatement.
I’ll be okay.
I love you too.

With that, he puts his phone on his coffee table and plans to ignore it for most of the day. Viktor doesn’t shower or do skin care as he normally would. He just brushes his teeth and his hair and calls it a day. He starts with a pot of dark roast coffee and strawberry Poptarts, his mom’s favourite. He has always been impartial to s’mores but it’s the one time of year he’ll bother with strawberry. 

Once he’s settled on the couch, he opens his ottoman and gets out an old green, blue and pink quilt. His maternal grandmother made it for his mom when she was a child, the proud Polish grandmother he never knew because she died of a heart attack when he was two. It’s kept safely away from Rio’s claws and fur except on special occasions. 

Tucked under the blanket, wearing only an oversized t-shirt and loose pair of shorts, he turns on Gilmore Girls. They watched every episode together, even when she was in the hospice. He still hasn’t finished past season five—episode sixteen aired the night that she died and he decided he wouldn’t watch without her. 

Viktor is only two episodes in when the tears start. Curling up on the couch, hugging his knees to his chest, he weeps like a child. Rio comes and lies next to him, just touching him, and it’s a slight comfort. The feelings are too big to contain and there’s a desperate urge to do something to keep his feet on the ground, because at the moment he feels like he’s drifting into the stratosphere. His grief is like a black hole, ready to swallow him whole.

Instinctively, he reaches for his phone. He doesn’t know what he’s doing with it when he opens his messages. His most recent ones are Powder and Sky, and then Jayce. His two best friends—his family—would be the logical choice to reach out to. They, in fact, invited it. But, he feels like he’s been burdening them every year for the last fourteen years with his misery, moodiness and untreated trauma. 

Viktor isn’t usually one to act impulsively, so when he hits the call button on Jayce’s contact card, his stomach suddenly drops with anxiety, like a boulder sinking to the ocean floor. He’s sitting on his couch, in the fetal position, sweating as it rings a few times. What the fuck am I doing? I should just hang up.

“Hello?” Jayce’s voice comes through, calm but confused. Viktor doesn’t respond right away, frozen as he takes deep breaths and tries to avoid having a breakdown on the phone. “Vik? You there?”

Just hang up. Just hang up.

“Y-Yeah, I’m here,” he finally responds, tightening his grip on his phone.

“Is… everything okay?”

“Um… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called.”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Jayce says quickly and in a reassuring tone. “I’m not doing anything right now. What’s… what’s going on?”

“Nothing—I mean—I’m—” Viktor starts and stops, and he isn’t actually sure what he’s supposed to say. I don’t want to spill my guts to Jayce, we didn’t agree to be that familiar, so what do I even want from him? Why did I call?

“Do you need a distraction?” 

It’s like Jayce just read his mind and told him what he needed when Viktor couldn’t decipher it. “Yes, please.”

“Would it help if I, uh, told you about my day?”

“Yes. Anything.”

“Okay. Well, honestly, I haven’t done much so far. I got up and went to the gym this morning, mostly because I couldn’t sleep in.”

“Why couldn’t you sleep?” Viktor lies down on his side and gets comfortable, switching to speakerphone then laying his phone next to his head.

“Just a really stressful week at work. I’m doing the work of two people right now. We’ve been looking for another, well, me, to balance things but none of the candidates have been…”

“Competent?”

Jayce laughs, and he has such a nice laugh. It’s soothing enough to make Viktor smile slightly as he wipes away the lingering tears with the heel of his hand. “That’s one way of putting it. I interviewed a few but they all seemed either too inexperienced or only interested in the money, not the work.”

“I know how you feel. I’ve had some incompetent assistants.” 

“Are you like some corporate bigwig or something? All you’ve ever talked about is your assistants.” 

“You’ll never know,” Viktor teases despite the heavy feelings still weighing down his heart. “What else did you do?”

“Oh. I was back at my place by eight so, showered, did my usual thing, then I made chocolate chip pancakes.”

“You went to the gym and then ate chocolate and carbs? I thought you buff types were all about protein and raw eggs or some shit.”

“Well, they were protein pancakes… but I’m not, like, a gym bro or anything. I just like to get my cardio and weight training in to maintain, not beef up.”

“Did you ever try to… ‘beef up’, as you call it?”

“Not really. I did a lot of sports growing up so I’ve always been active. Soccer, rugby and track mostly. I played basketball in university for a couple years too. But last year I got into tennis so I’ve been doing that when I have the time.”

“Oh, a collegiate basketball player, huh? That’s hot,” Viktor teases but he doesn’t actually feel it, partially masking the grief he’s been stewing in all week. “Obviously, exercise is not that accessible to me but I stretch regularly. I like going to the community centre for the pool on occasion, it’s the only exercise I can really do that doesn’t cause me a lot of pain. What do you like about it?”

“Well… I have ADHD so it helps me get out a lot of excess energy. It actually improves a lot of things like executive function and impulsivity.”

“Oh. I didn’t know that. That you have ADHD and it helps with those things,” Viktor says, looking at Jayce in a new light. “I suspect I may have level one ASD but I’m not concerned enough with it to pursue a diagnosis. It’s not like they can cure autism with drugs.”

“I could see that. What makes you think that though?”

“I’m not very good at socializing, and I’m not good at hiding it. I don’t understand all the… unspoken rules about socializing. When we first hooked up, me being blunt and asking you if you wanted to fuck me was just me avoiding the little song and dance of trying to see if you’d come home with me. It’s worked for me half the time. Sometimes guys are eager to say yes, other times they’re turned off by me being so direct.”

“Oh, yep… that makes a lot of sense. I’m realizing now that not being able to read your expressions sometimes may just be autism. I thought you were just, uh…”

“Detached with a stick up my ass?” Viktor huffs out a laugh. 

“Nah. I know you don’t have a stick up your ass, I’ve been down there.” There’s a grin in Jayce’s voice and Viktor rolls his eyes affectionately, glad the other man can’t see his obvious expression of fondness. “So, wait, are you a math savant? Is that how you can do math so quickly in your head?”

“Yes. Like I mentioned before, I was doing work two grades above my level by the time I was eight. I graduated high school when I was sixteen but I could have done it sooner. I kind of had… a lot going on so I decided not to.”

“Damn. I graduated when I was seventeen but that’s only because I have a summer birthday, so I was always the youngest in my class,” Jayce says before pausing with a hum. “Do you have hyperfixations?”

“I have more long term ones than short term. Plants, specific TV shows, science, photography. I go through a lot of food fixations, though.”

“Wait, you do photography?”

“Eh… used to. Not much anymore, just don’t really have the time or energy. I do like and collect creative photography though.”

“Oh, right, the pictures of Zaun in your room?”

“Yeah. What about you?”

“Lots of short term. My current one is whales.”

Viktor smiles to himself with perplexed amusement. “Whales? Why whales?”

“Because they’re cool? The blue whale is the largest animal in the world, that’s so fucking crazy. Did you know they’re like a hundred feet long?” It’s like a dam has broken and Jayce’s excitement is palpable through the phone. “Also, humpback whales don’t eat for half the year while they’re migrating. I can barely go two hours without a snack, nevermind six months.”

Viktor laughs, and it’s his first wholehearted laugh that week. 

“What? What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, nothing. It’s just so obvious you have ADHD. I know what it’s like. I can talk for hours about my work, which is a hyperfixation of mine.”

“Oh, me too.” There's a lull in the conversation, but after a few moments, Jayce asks, “Why did you call me? You’ve never called me before.”

“I… needed someone to talk to that wasn’t going to get me to talk about my feelings, I guess. It was kind of an impulse.”

“Having a bad day?”

“Having a bad week,” Viktor says weakly. “The only thing I was busy with today was rotting.”

“I just call that decompressing.”

“Thanks for… for picking up and, um, keeping me company.”

“Yeah, it’s no problem. I mean… you can call me anytime and I’ll probably pick up. Or I’ll at least get back to you.”

Viktor smiles slightly and a warm feeling radiates in his chest. Maybe this is what having a boyfriend is like. Not that Jayce is. He might be the closest thing I’ll get to one for… a long time, at least. Until I’m satisfied enough with my career to consider settling down. Rio chooses that moment to jump on top of Viktor and start walking over his ribs, prompting Viktor to groan. “Sakra, you’re heavy.”

“What? I’m heavy? I mean, yeah—”

“Not you. Rio’s standing on my ribs. Come on, prdelička, sit down,” he says as he puts light pressure on her back to encourage her to sit. She does so after a moment and the pain subsides.

“What do you call her?”

“It, uh… it means ‘little butt’.”

Jayce laughs on the other line. “Little butt? Why little butt?”

“It’s an unusual term of endearment in my first language. I just think it’s cute.”

“When I had a dog growing up, I always called her ‘Princess Stinky’. She wasn’t that stinky, it just stuck.”

“That’s cute. What kind of dog was she?”

“A collie German shepherd mix. Her name was Daisy. We got her when I was four and she passed away when I was seventeen.”

“I’m sorry… I don’t know what I’m going to do when Rio dies. She’s my first pet.”

“How long have you had her?”

“Three years now. As of tomorrow.”

Jayce pauses for a few seconds, and Viktor realizes that he’s probably connecting the dots that this is a bad time of year for Viktor. Grief is the whole reason he got Rio in the first place. “Tomorrow must be a really bad day then.”

“Yeah…” Viktor trails off, absently petting Rio, and he decides to steer the conversation away from such a sensitive subject. “How’d you get into whales, by the way?”

“I watched a documentary last night then spent three hours in a Wikipedia rabbit hole. Now I want to go to California because Monterey is one of the best places in the world to see humpbacks.”

“New York is the only other state I’ve been to the entire time I’ve lived in Massachusetts.”

“Really? We should go together.”

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “Really? You’re trying to plan a vacation with your fuck buddy?” 

“Why not? Sex on the beach—”

“Illegal. And I hate sand.”

“Okay, the ocean?”

“Also illegal and risky. Plus, salt water getting involved might not be pleasant.”

“Uh… the hotel pool?” 

“I’m noticing a pattern here. Do you have a public sex kink I don’t know about?”

Jayce hums and Viktor can hear some shuffling on the other end, like he’s getting comfortable. “Maybe. It might be a fantasy of mine. Mostly I’m trying to convince you to go to California with me.”

“Yeah, you’re going to have to try harder than that,” Viktor laughs softly. 

Over the next hour, Viktor learns a lot about whales, Jayce’s childhood, and all the phases he’s gone through. Jayce had a magic hyperfixation when he was twelve where he actually started to learn how to do magic tricks. Viktor returns the favour by telling Jayce about his own childhood and phases, like X-Men comics and Greek philosophers. Plus, he educates him on plants, like how flowers get their different colours. 

When Viktor realizes that they’ve been talking for almost two hours and his phone is at twenty percent battery, he asks, “Hey… do you just want to come over?”

“I thought you wanted to rot today?” 

“I did but… talking to you is helping a lot. As long as you’re okay with me continuing to rot.”

“I mean… yeah, I’d come over now. Do you mean to stay?”

“Yes. I haven’t even done skin care or showered today though, so promise you won’t judge?”

“Nah, I won’t judge. Do you still want me to stay tomorrow night too?”

“Yes—I mean, only if you want to.”

Viktor hears more rustling on the other end of the call and a door opening. “I’m packing a bag now.”

They talk while Jayce packs, and while he locks up, and then while driving to Viktor’s. He doesn’t even hang up until Jayce is pulling into the driveway. Viktor is anxiously standing by the door while he listens to Jayce open and close his car door and come up the walkway. He doesn’t bother waiting to open it right after Jayce knocks. 

“Hey,” Jayce says with a soft smile, and Viktor can’t help but think how handsome he is. It’s successfully distracting him. 

“Hey,” Viktor replies while drinking him in. He’s only wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a plain black Nike hoodie. While, yes, he is extremely attracted to Jayce and almost always aroused around him—possibly a Pavlovian response—right now, he just wants a warm body to hold on to. “Could I…”

“Hug?” Jayce easily reads his mind for the second time that day and Viktor just nods. Stepping inside and closing the door, Jayce drops his bag and immediately wraps his arms around Viktor’s shoulders, pulling him to his chest. 

Burying his nose in Jayce’s shoulder, Viktor sets his crutch down against the wall blindly before looping his arms around Jayce’s middle. He smells of laundry detergent and clean skin, immediately comforting him. In slow circles, Jayce’s hand starts rubbing his back and he presses a kiss to the top of his head. It’s nice. He’s spent every anniversary alone all these years, as much as Sky and Powder fought him on it, but Jayce can give him things that his best friends can’t. Not just sex, but some semblance of remedying romance and affection he can delude himself into believing is genuine.

He’s not your boyfriend, he reminds himself. Although, another voice in his head, from a more emotional and fragile corner of his psyche, replies back. What’s the harm in pretending, though? 

Finally pulling away, Viktor looks up at Jayce and says, “Thank you for coming.” 

“Of course. You know… if you’re having a bad day, I’m always happy to come over for a distraction or just a warm body.”

“I appreciate that… I can do the same, you know?”

“You already have,” Jayce says before kissing Viktor’s temple. “You look beautiful as always, by the way. I don’t know why you were worried about me judging.”

Huffing, Viktor replies with scrutiny, “You’re just saying that.”

“Not at all, I mean it.” He cradles Viktor’s face, as if he were made of glass, before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on his lips. It’s tender, a barely there touch that Viktor reciprocates as he wraps the palm of his hand around Jayce’s nape. As expected, Jayce shivers at the contact, pressing his lips to Viktor’s harder while his thick arm holds him close.

Viktor isn’t exactly in the mood to have sex at that moment, which Jayce seems to pick up on, because his affection remains innocent and unhurried. When Jayce’s lips part from his own, they don’t go far as Jayce peppers kisses over Viktor’s cheek, temple and forehead. Viktor refuses to overthink it. “What do you wanna do?” Jayce finally asks, rubbing his back. “I’ll do whatever you want.”

“I don’t want to make all the decisions, that’s not fair to you,” he says with a frown. 

“I’m welcoming it. I’m flexible, I promise.”

Viktor turned off Gilmore Girls an hour ago after their call had gone so long. He usually watches that but… it feels sacred, he wouldn’t watch it with just anyone. “I’m trying to think of something that might be… distracting. Low brain power.” 

“Would you like me to recommend something or do you want to peruse Netflix?”

“I’m willing to take suggestions.”

“How do you feel about reality tv?”

Pinching his brows together in thought, Viktor says, “I’m trying to think if I’ve watched any reality tv. What were you thinking?”

“There’s a new one on Netflix called Love is Blind. Basically they put a bunch of single men and women in single rooms so they can only hear them, and then they get engaged without seeing each other. Then at the end of the show they’re supposed to get married which is like… a month later.”

“Sounds like entertaining heterosexual nonsense,” Viktor snorts. “I’ll give it a shot.”

When Viktor crawled out of bed that afternoon, he didn’t anticipate ending up on the couch with Jayce, wrapped up in his arms while lying on top of him. Jayce’s heart is beating steadily against his ear, and his warm, broad hand rubs his back. It’s nice, nice enough that Viktor starts falling asleep almost as soon as the second episode starts. At some point, he registers that the show was turned off and Jayce’s hand is petting his hair, but he slips into unconsciousness. 

Rio meows loudly and jumps onto his back, jolting him awake. It seems to shock Jayce from his own nap. Groaning from the discomfort, Viktor grabs his phone to glance at the time. 4:42 pm. “Girl, you’re early,” Viktor chastises drowsily. 

Huffing out a sleepy laugh, Jayce reaches up to pet Rio, still standing on Viktor’s back. “Is she hurting you?” 

“Yeah, can you get her to sit? Usually if you put some pressure on her back she gets the hint.” It seems to work because a moment later, Rio is lying on his back, purring loudly. “Sorry for falling asleep on you.”

“Hey, I’m not complaining. Was the show that boring though?”

“No, I was enjoying the ridiculousness of it all, you’re just comfortable.” 

“I think I know where you fell asleep so we can try again if you want?”

“Mm, sure,” Viktor hums, nuzzling his cheek against Jayce’s pec. In the sleepy haze, his walls are down and he’s just letting himself indulge in the comfort that is Jayce.

Thick fingers comb through his long hair again, reciprocating the affection. “You hungry?”

The question makes Viktor realize that he is, in fact, starving. “Um, yeah, I, uh… I’ve only had Poptarts and coffee today.”

“Okay, we gotta fix that. I could cook something rather than takeout. Unless takeout would be comforting?”

“I’m a picky eater so that depends on what you have in mind.”

“Something simple, like pasta?”

“What kind of pasta?”

“Well… I make a pretty good vegetarian pasta. It’s just olive oil, garlic, cherry tomatoes, spinach and bocconcini. I usually use rotini or fusilli.” 

Tilting his head up to look at Jayce, he studies the man’s face. The kindness feels like more than he deserves and he’s searching for any evidence of pity or martyrdom. As always, Jayce’s eyes look honest. He’s doing this because he cares about me, to some degree at least. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty easy to make.”

“Then… yes, it sounds like something I’d like. I prefer fusilli.” 

“Where’s your nearest grocery store?” 

“It’s a five minute drive. At the edge of the Lanes.”

“Okay. You wanna stay here or come with me? After the princess is fed that is.” As if on cue, Rio chirps from where she’s still lying on Viktor’s back, prompting Jayce to laugh. “Yes, I’m talking about you chiquita.” 

While Viktor has never ventured out his door when he’s doing his annual mourning, other than when he adopted Rio on a whim, he doesn’t want to be without Jayce’s comforting company. “As long as you’re fine with me going out barely presentable.”

“I don’t care, V,” Jayce shrugs under him. 

“Then, yeah, I’ll come. I can buy groceries since you’re cooking.”

“‘Kay, let’s do it.” 

Viktor changes into a pair of dark sweatpants and pulls on a maroon hoodie. Putting his hair in a bun, he looks at himself in the bathroom mirror for a few moments. “Sakra… you look rough,” he mutters, touching his face. His nose is the same as his mother’s and he can see familiar folds forming under his eyes. Sometimes I wish my eyes were blue like her’s—not like táta’s.

“Vik?” Jayce calls, cracking the door open to Viktor’s bedroom. 

“Yeah, coming,” Viktor calls back, still staring at his reflection. Despite saying he was coming, his mind wanders to dark places and he begins to feel like he’s outside of his body. I wonder if I’ll make it farther than forty-three. The odds aren’t in my favour. I wonder what it’ll be. Liver disease from the fucking alcoholism I inherited from my father? Lung cancer like it did her?

“Hey… you okay?” Jayce’s voice snaps him out of his thoughts. He’s now standing in the doorway of his bathroom behind him, furrowing his brows with concern. 

“Yeah, I, um… stared at myself for too long and started to dissociate,” Viktor admits with embarrassment, tucking a stray lock of hair behind his ear. 

“Been there.” Without warning, Jayce approaches him from behind and wraps his arms around his waist. Hooking his chin on Viktor’s shoulder, Jayce asks, “What were you thinking about?”

Viktor leans into Jayce’s touch instinctively, placing his hands over Jayce’s. He rationalizes that it’s to help keep him balanced while he puts most of his weight on his left leg. It takes a moment of debating whether or not to be honest with him, but eventually Viktor says, “How I wished I looked more like my mom.”

“Why’s that?” 

“Do you really want to know?” 

“Yeah.”

“The man whose eyes, mouth and hair I have is an angry, alcoholic asshole,” Viktor admits quietly, watching Jayce in the mirror to gauge his reaction. “I don’t like that I look so much like him.”

Viktor half expects Jayce to pull away or try to change the topic of conversation, but Jayce simply says, “You’re your own person. It sucks that you’re reminded of him, but your face is your own, not his. It doesn’t reflect anything on you.” As if to punctuate his point, Jayce presses a gentle kiss to the hinge of Viktor’s jaw.

If you only knew how scared I am of becoming him, Viktor thinks, gripping Jayce’s hand tightly. It’s part of the reason I can’t let you too close. I don’t want to hurt you like that. “Maybe,” Viktor decides to say, trying to pull away from Jayce’s embrace. 

“Hey, not maybe,” Jayce insists as he pulls Viktor back in, holding him tightly. “We are not our parents, no matter how much we look like them. I’m the spitting image of my dad but there are things about him I don’t want to replicate. We make our choices, not them.”

Viktor’s chest aches, not expecting such comfort and support from a man he’s barely known for five months. Maybe five months is longer than I think. Jayce is starting to know the real me and so far he hasn’t… rejected me. Turning around in Jayce’s arms, Viktor loops his own around the other man’s neck and buries his face in his collarbone. “Thank you. For everything. I know all of this must be a lot. More than you signed up for, at least.”

Hugging his lithe form, Jayce rests his head on top of Viktor’s. “It’s not. I knew what I was getting into. And I want you to know… I don’t want you to feel any pressure to have sex this weekend. That’s not what I’m here for.”

Have I felt pressure? I hadn’t even really thought about sex… at least not yet. Pulling away to look Jayce in the eyes, Viktor says, “I’m going to be honest—I use sex as a coping mechanism. So, more than likely, I will want to hop on your dick at some point this weekend.” He lets out a small laugh, trying to keep the statement light. However, Sky has been telling him to get a therapist and not more dick for the last decade, but Jayce doesn’t need to know that.

“Hey, I’m happy to provide,” Jayce chuckles. “I just wanted you to understand I wasn’t standing here wondering when I was going to get laid.”

“I understand. I think we’re on the same page.”

“Ready to get going or do you need a little more time to have an existential crisis?”

Snorting, Viktor playfully slaps Jayce on the shoulder. “Shut up. Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not! Genuinely, if you need to spiral for another ten minutes, I’m happy to stay here and keep you grounded.”

“I’m fine, Jay,” Viktor sighs before leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. “Let’s go. Can you drive? My hip is a little irritated today.”

“Sure. Does driving bother you a lot?” 

“If I do it for too long, yes. I’m usually okay for an hour before I need a break, on a good day that is. Some days it’s been so bad I had to Uber or carpool to work. Honestly wish it was my left femur that decided to fuck me over instead, but left is my dominant side so that could be annoying too. Really, there’s no winning,” Viktor shrugs. “Anyway, I could drive, but if I can avoid it on bad days, it’s preferable I don’t.”

“I have no problem driving. I’m a careful driver too so promise you won’t have to grab the ‘oh shit’ bar,” Jayce chuckles, finally releasing his hold on Viktor. “I’ve got reusable bags in my trunk, by the way.”

“Yes, I can recognize an environmentalist by your EV.” 

Viktor quickly feeds Rio before they leave, who eagerly eats her wet food like a starved stray. Ten minutes later they’re at the small, family-owned grocery store that’s situated on the edge of the Lanes. Jayce grabs his bags before they head into the store together, and Viktor is already feeling overstimulated. It’s Saturday evening, so it’s busy. It’s not as busy as The Last Drop gets on Friday nights but there are definitely more people than Viktor was emotionally and mentally prepared to handle.

After Jayce grabs a basket, Viktor hesitantly asks, “Could I, um… could I hold onto your arm or something?”

“Is your hip bothering you?” Jayce tilts his head. “I don’t mind.”

“No, I’m just… I think it would be grounding. I’m not good with crowds, especially when I’m… not doing well up here,” Viktor says as he taps his temple. 

“Yeah, of course, whatever makes you feel comfortable.” Jayce offers his arm like it’s nothing and Viktor curls his hand around Jayce’s bicep, feeling the defined muscle under his hoodie. “Let me know if you need anything else. I know what it’s like. I, uh… struggle with anxiety. Generalized anxiety disorder.”

“Really?” Viktor blinks at Jayce as they start to peruse the produce. “You always seem so… confident.”

“Well, I’ve been medicated for the last fourteen years. Plus, I got good at hiding it,” Jayce says with a weak smile, picking up a container of cherry tomatoes.

“You know you can tell me if you’re ever feeling that way, right?” It’s the least I owe him after him going out of his way to keep me company on a whim. 

“I appreciate that but I have very few reasons to be worried when I’m around you,” he replies before chuckling while fetching a garlic bulb. “I think I sleep better in your bed than I do in my own.”

“That’s because your bedroom is as cold as the arctic circle.”

“Hey, I added a fake plant and some photos. It’s a little less cold… feels like Alaska rather than the North Pole.”

Snorting, Viktor absently brushes his thumb over Jayce’s bicep as they make their way over to the coolers with the greens. “My mattress is better too, so that might be it.”

“No, pretty sure it’s the whole… not sleeping alone thing. It’s comforting. Though, yes, you do have a nice mattress.” Jayce grabs some spinach before he asks, “Where’s the cheese?”

“Against the back wall, around the corner,” Viktor points down the aisle before they head that way. Shyly, Viktor decides to admit, “You know… you’re the only guy I’ve had stay over. So, not sleeping alone is new to me.”

“Really? You never… not even with your old fuck buddy?”

Shrugging, Viktor says, “I always went to his apartment then left. I didn’t even let him in my apartment the entire time I was fucking around with him.”

“Why?” 

“Eh… I was going through it. My apartment was kind of a disaster.”

After they locate a tub of mini bocconcini, Jayce asks, “Pasta?”

“Aisle six, if I remember correctly.”

As they head there, they reach the snacks and drinks aisles and Jayce stops to ask, “You want any junk food? Cheetos? Chocolate?”

Viktor pinches his brows together in thought before he nods. “I could fuck with some Cheetos. I don’t have any soda at home, do you want to get some?”

“Yeah, whatcha like?”

“I’m impartial to Dr. Pepper but I can compromise for Pepsi.”

“Pepsi?” Jayce questions with a look of disbelief then disgust. “Ew.”

With confusion, Viktor reacts with indignation. “What? There’s nothing wrong with it!”

“Yeah, except it’s a Coke copycat.”

“Ew. Coke? It’s way too sweet.”

“And Dr. Pepper isn’t?”

“No. The bizarre concoction of twenty three flavours balances it out,” Viktor huffs out a laugh, guiding Jayce down the drink aisle first. 

“What are the flavours anyway?”

“I don’t remember all of them but I do remember black licorice, tomato and carrot are in there.”

“That is bizarre. I’ll settle for Dr. Pepper, by the way.”

“Good, because there’s no way in hell I’m buying Coke just for you.”

As Jayce grabs a bottle, Viktor suddenly hears a familiar voice come from his right. “Viktor?”

With moderate panic, Viktor snaps his head to the right and sees Silco standing there with a mix of confusion and concern on his scarred face. He’s holding a bottle of Grape Crush, which can only mean Powder is coming for dinner. 

“Uh, hey, Sil…” Viktor greets awkwardly, letting go of Jayce’s arm to appear a little less attached to the man he’s been denying is his boyfriend for months now. This won’t help his case.

“What are you doing here?” Silco’s sharp eyes flicker over to Jayce, who seems hesitant to speak because of the awkward energy between them. The silent question is and with him?

“Just… um, picking up some things for dinner.”

“What are you doing here this weekend?”

Turning to Jayce, Viktor says, “Can you go grab Cheetos and pasta while I talk to Silco?” 

Jayce looks mildly confused but he nods and says, “Yeah. Do you want me to wait for you at the check out?” 

“Yeah, I’ll see you in a few minutes.” Once Jayce has walked away, Viktor sighs and turns back to his pseudo-father. “Listen, don’t tell Powder about this. I know she’d be upset with me that I didn’t call her.”

“And you called him?” Silco arches a thin brow. “Why?”

“I… I wanted company with someone who wasn’t going to get me to talk about my feelings, or pity me. Jayce felt like… a neutral support,” Viktor explains with a frown.

Mirroring Viktor’s expression, Silco steps closer and places his free hand on Viktor’s shoulder. “We don’t pity you. You know that, son.”

Silco has called him ‘son’ many times before, hundreds probably, but when he’s mourning his mother it stings rather than soothes. “Yeah, but it can sometimes feel that way. I like that Jayce doesn’t know why I’m in a shit mood. I called him on an impulse and he was successfully distracting me, so… I asked him to come over. He’s making me dinner now.”

Silco sighs as he retracts his hand. “I have tried to stay out of your business when it comes to this relationship you have with this man. I know Powder and Vander have been pressing you on it, but I do think they have a point. If you chose to call him at your lowest… I think maybe you’re denying yourself a good thing that you do want, you’re just afraid to have it.”

It’s Viktor’s turn to sigh, running a hand over his eyes before dropping it to his side. “Okay, I get it, you’re in the ‘Viktor should date Jayce’ boat. I’m not having this conversation right now—”

“You never want to have this conversation.”

It infuriates him how well Silco knows him. They’re cut from the same cloth and relate on dozens of things, which just makes it easier for him to read Viktor than a book for toddlers. The anger comes out in his tone, quiet and deadly. “No. You’re right, I don’t. I wish everyone would just drop it. I’m an adult, I can do what I want with who I want in my free time, and I’m allowed to have boundaries. It’s starting to piss me off.”

With another subtle frown of disappointment, Silco nods. “I will leave it alone. You’re right, you’re an adult, you’re in control of your own life. We’re just worried you’re closing yourself off from—”

“A good thing, I know, I’ve got the message. Even if, in theory, he would be ‘good for me’,” Viktor emphasises by making quotation marks with one hand, “I’m not ready for a relationship. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready, frankly. And wouldn’t it be unfair if I establish some sort of relationship with him only to turn around and say ‘hey, actually, this isn’t for me’? I’m sparing both of us from something that honestly wouldn’t work out. And, besides, he said he doesn’t want a boyfriend, so it’s a moot point.”

“Alright, alright,” Silco admits defeat, raising one hand in surrender. “I will drop it and I will try to get Vander and Powder to ease up. My husband will behave but I can’t say the same for your sister.”

Viktor’s shoulders relax with relief. “Thank you.” 

“On a positive note… I’m glad to see you’re being taken care of,” his adopted father says with a slight smile. “I hope he does help you cope with your grief.”

“He’s doing a fantastic job so far,” he responds with a similar expression. “It was nice seeing you, Sil. Tell Van and Pow I said hi… just say I was getting milk because my depressed ass was having cereal for dinner.”

“You know I don’t like lying to them.”

“It’s a white lie, what’s the harm?”

“You know if Powder finds out she’s going to be upset.”

“Well… what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her,” Viktor sighs with a shrug. “Anyway, Jayce is waiting so I’m gonna go.”

“Alright… take care, Viktor.”

“Thanks. You too, Sil.”

Jayce is lingering near the checkout, pondering the assortment of cheap chocolate bars when Viktor reaches him. “Hey, you want one?” Jayce asks, nodding to the display. Viktor appreciates that Jayce isn’t asking any questions and grabs a KitKat, tossing it in the basket right after Jayce’s Baby Ruth.

It takes them fifteen minutes to pay, load their groceries in Jayce’s car, then get back to Viktor’s place. He thought he was in the clear but, when they enter his home, Jayce asks, “So… can I ask what that was about?”

“You can, I can’t guarantee you’ll like the vague answer I’m going to give you,” Viktor replies, kicking off his sneakers then moving to sit on the couch where Rio is sleeping. 

“I’ll take vague over nothing,” Jayce says as he toes off his own shoes and carries the groceries to the kitchen. “So?”

“Silco knows I’m in a bad headspace this weekend, and he knows why. He was surprised to see me there when usually I lock myself in my house and don’t come out until I have to.”

Unpacking their purchases, Jayce raises a brow at Viktor. “And… you’re close with Silco or…?” 

“You can say that, yes. I’m not going to get into the how or why,” Viktor says with finality. “Think you could watch Love is Blind while you cook?”

“Yeah, as long as I can hear.” 

They spend the next hour watching the bizarre but entertaining reality show while Jayce cooks them dinner. When he passes Viktor a bowl full of the simple and delicious smelling pasta, he says, “Thank you for making this… it’s definitely much better for me than my plan of eating Lucky Charms to sustain myself.”

“Happy to provide you with something nutritious,” Jayce says before kissing his hair and sitting next to him on the couch. The small sign of affection makes him blush, though he tries to ignore it. “I can’t believe Lauren and Cameron are already engaged, it’s been like two days. Do you think they’ll actually make it down the aisle?”

“I have no fucking clue. I’m kind of rooting for them, though.”

When Viktor is full of pasta, he ends up curled into Jayce’s side again. They spend most of the evening making their own commentary, cringing and laughing hysterically when Cameron raps. It’s around eleven when Viktor begins to yawn, despite not even being awake twelve hours.

“Bed?” Jayce prompts, brushing a hand over Viktor’s hair. 

“Yeah, is that okay?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty tired too.”

They go through their usual routine and Viktor wears a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt to bed while Jayce merely strips down to his boxer briefs.

“Thanks for coming today,” Viktor whispers, barely brushing his fingertips over Jayce’s beard as he faces him in bed. “It means a lot to me…” 

“Of course,” Jayce replies, just as quiet when he turns his head to kiss the palm of Viktor’s hand. 

“You’re very… sweet to me. I’m not used to it,” Viktor admits, a faint flush on his cheeks. Ever since Valentine’s Day, he’s had on rose-tinted glasses. Wouldn’t this be nice? To not be so alone all the time? A voice in the back of his mind asks, and he wants to fall into Jayce’s arms and ask him to stay—forever, ideally—but he knows that’s his fragile state of mind talking.

“You deserve it. I can kinda tell that… this—us—must be therapeutic for you.”

How can he see past my walls? “I mean… yes. Life hasn’t been the kindest to me. Sex has always been an escape from the stress and the—” Trauma. So much fucking trauma. “—the bad things.” 

“I never asked… what happened with your project? I got a sense that things have kinda gone downhill since November. You’ve seemed stressed.”

“It got killed. Fucking money-grubbing assholes. I’ve been kind of miserable at work so… the sex is definitely helping.”

“I’m sorry,” Jayce says, kissing his palm again. “I know you said sex is an escape but… this is more than just sex to me.”

Viktor’s heart skips a beat then clenches with anxiety. Is he saying what I think he’s saying? No, he can’t… “ Then… what is it then?”

Reaching up to brush his thumb over Viktor’s cheekbone, making Viktor’s heartrate spike, Jayce whispers, “Companionship. Like you said on New Year’s, we can be lonely together. We can fill a hole in our lives that would take much more complicated things, like a real relationship, to fill.”

Oh. Right. This isn’t a real relationship, I’ve just been pretending it is. There’s a sense of disappointment clouding his insides, like a toxic miasma, that he does his best to dismiss as a sense of wanting that any person would have. “Yeah. That makes sense.”

“And as your companion, I’d like to treat you with care. Spoil you, even. Not like, with material goods or anything, just… affection,” Jayce pauses to lean in and kiss Viktor’s shoulder. “Tenderness.” Another kiss to the crook of his neck. “Comfort.” A kiss to his pulse before Jayce whispers in his ear. “Compassion.”

It’s not love—not that I’m looking for it—but it’s something. I’ll take what I can get and I’ll be greedy about it too. 

“I… I would like that very much,” Viktor confesses before turning his head towards Jayce’s. Cupping his face with both hands, he draws him in for a slow, methodical kiss. Viktor focuses on the bow of his upper lip, the chapped skin of his bottom one, and Jayce’s tongue slyly peeking out as if to ask consent. Opening his mouth, he welcomes the other man in, prepared to be swept away into his fantasies again.

Their kiss transforms from gentle to passionate as Jayce sucks on his tongue and creeps one hand below the hem of Viktor’s shirt. He pauses at Viktor’s hip, giving him ample time to push him away or say no, but Viktor never wants to say no. However, he breaks the kiss to ask Jayce about something he’s been thinking about… something that might be therapeutic. “How do you feel about spanking?”

Jayce blinks at him. “Receiving or delivering?”

“In this case, delivering.”

“I like it but do you really want to… right now?”

“Pain releases endorphins that would probably feel really good right now,” Viktor urges, batting his eyelashes at Jayce. “It’s been a while since I’ve done it but I promise, I can take it, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“No, I have no other protests,” Jayce replies before hiking Viktor’s shirt up to his armpits and pushing him down on the bed. His calloused hands follow the angular curves of Viktor’s torso, ghosting over his reconstructed nipples and mastectomy scars, and tracing each rib. Rather than kiss him again, Jayce just watches Viktor, drinking him in as moonlight illuminates his porcelain skin.

I kind of want to… let him do it again. Viktor is not one to take risks without thinking things through. He shouldn’t even be considering it because of what happened last time, however… Things are different now.

Quietly, Viktor asks, “Have you had any unprotected sex since you did with me?”

Jayce blinks at him and shakes his head. “I haven’t been having sex with anyone else.”

“Wait, really?” Viktor blinks up at Jayce, and the spectre of jealousy that had been occasionally lingering in the back of his mind fades away. 

“Yeah, I can’t juggle more than one fuck buddy and I have no interest in finding another. And why would I pick up strangers if I have you already?” 

Viktor can’t help but feel flattered that Jayce has him, like he possesses Viktor. I might like being his. “Okay, well… I don’t think we need to use condoms anymore.”

“I—uh—so do you trust me to pull out or…?”

“No, I want you to come inside me,” Viktor whispers, caressing his cheek until he can run his thumb over Jayce’s bottom lip, opening his mouth up. 

Jayce looks dumbstruck but he has enough sense to say, “Okay, but what about—”

“I have an IUD now. Any more questions?” Viktor gives him an amused smile, patiently waiting for Jayce to finally get on with it. 

“No,” Jayce answers, kissing the pad of Viktor’s thumb before dipping his head and connecting his lips with Viktor’s collarbone to mark his skin purple. His hands are at the waistband of Viktor’s sweatpants, pulling them down gradually as he makes his way down Viktor’s body, his lips visiting all of his (presumably) favourite places. Viktor shudders when Jayce dips his tongue in his belly button, feeling his cock tingle with want. 

Then, Jayce pulls away, taking Viktor’s sweats and underwear with him. Tossing them aside, Jayce sits on the edge of the bed and pats his lap. “C’mere, baby.”

Typically, Viktor doesn’t like being told what to do, but, it’s Jayce. He’s different. I don’t know if it’s that I actually respect him, or because I’d do more or less anything he told me to. Willingly, Viktor sits up then crawls into Jayce’s lap, his body draped over his thighs with his bare ass accessible to Jayce’s hand. He folds his arms, propping his head up on them as he lies face down on the bed, head turned toward Jayce. “Like this?”

“That’s perfect,” Jayce whispers sweetly, brushing a lock of hair out of Viktor’s face. He keeps one hand cradling Viktor’s head while the other strokes the skin of his right ass cheek. “You know the light system?”

“Green, good. Yellow, check-in. Red, stop.”

“Good. Is it okay to hit your right or should I keep it to the left?”

“You can do both… just favour the left,” Viktor replies, chewing his bottom lip in anticipation. Without another word from Jayce, there’s a sudden strike to his left cheek. His hand is powerful, though not unkind, and somehow, he just knew how much force and where to connect skin to skin. A moan slips past Viktor’s lips, choked and shameless, while his skin vibrates like static on a television.

“How’d that feel, baby?” Jayce asks, rubbing the stinging skin soothingly. He’s laying the pet name on thick, presumably just to be sweet, and Viktor actually doesn’t mind. It makes his chest fill with warmth. I’d like to be someone’s ‘baby’, he thinks to himself in the haze of arousal. 

“Felt good. Again… please,” Viktor murmurs, remembering his manners rather than demanding as he usually would. As requested, Jayce’s hand meets his skin and makes it sing with pain. Viktor lets out a small whimper, feeling the reverberation up his spine, as tears begin to prickle in his eyes. After a few moments and a shuddering breath, Viktor rasps, “Please keep going.”

A succession of strikes are delivered to each of his cheeks. Left, left, right, left, right, left, left, left, his brain recites with each point of contact. Every time, some kind of noise leaves his mouth—never a word, just small sighs, high-pitched whines, and pathetic whimpers. When Jayce pauses to run his calloused palm over Viktor’s raw epidermis, tears trickle down his nose and temple, onto his arms. Jayce seems to notice how outside of his body Viktor feels because he stops and asks, “Vik? You okay?”

“Yeah,” Viktor mumbles, arching his back further. The world is in a misty daze while his brain is flooded with endorphins. He just barely remembers to use his words. “Green.” 

The clapping of Jayce’s hand against his ass cheeks ring through his bedroom. His knees begin to shake as his cheeks get progressively more tender. Jayce is consistent in how hard he hits and where he hits, continuously striking the meaty parts of his ass and not the boney areas as past hookups have. The more he has sex with Jayce, the more he realizes he was having mediocre sex for a long time.

“Yellow,” Viktor gasps when a certain spank to his right cheek suddenly feels like too much. On second thought, though, the idea of another smack makes him feel overstimulated. “A-Actually, red.” 

“Okay, baby,” Jayce says gently, stroking his sore skin. “You did so good.” 

Viktor lets out a pitiful sound as tears start to flow freely. 

“Hey, hey, I got you,” Jayce whispers before picking Viktor up, getting him to sit up so he can hold him. When secured in Jayce’s arms, he presses kisses to the crown of Viktor’s head. “It’s okay, you can cry.” 

It’s embarrassing how quickly he dissolves into sobs in Jayce’s strong embrace. He isn’t even sure why he’s crying at this point. Is it because of the endorphins? Is it because I’m mourning my mother? Is it because I’m so fucking lonely all the time? It doesn’t matter the reason, he cries into Jayce’s chest, who treats him with what he thinks to be undeserved kindness. Gentle kisses are continuously pressed to his temple until he lifts his head and meets Jayce’s lips. Tears are still rolling down his cheeks but he drowns it out with a kiss. However, Jayce breaks it and says, “Hey, are you sure you want to keep going? I just… you seem really…”

“I’m okay. I want this,” Viktor replies before drawing him in again. He can taste the salt of his own tears tracing his upper lip, and if Jayce can taste it too, it doesn’t deter him from kissing back. 

Within moments, Jayce has repositioned them so Viktor is comfortably lying on a pillow, still maintaining their kiss. Viktor reaches down to palm the underside of Jayce’s clothed erection, earning a groan in return. “Jayce,” Viktor breathes when he breaks the kiss. “I don’t want you to prep me. I’m ready.”

“Are you su—”

“Yes, stop asking,” Viktor huffs, pushing Jayce’s underwear down with both hands. 

“Yes, sir,” Jayce replies, helping Viktor free his length. Jayce returns to Viktor’s lips while guiding his cock to Viktor’s entrance then sinking in.

The stretch is intense at first, but he’s wet enough from the spanking alone that he gradually makes a home for Jayce inside him. Viktor relishes in the feeling of his skin without a condom. He’s hotter to the touch and the slide of his cock has a little more resistance, in a good way. It’s better than he remembers it being, which only drives him to kiss Jayce harder. He wraps his arms around Jayce’s neck and hooks his left leg over the other man’s hip, as he’s done at least a dozen times by now. 

When Viktor taps his heel against Jayce’s ass cheek, his bed partner takes his time drawing his hips back then forward once again. Usually, he would demand faster and harder, but with the delicate condition he’s in, Jayce taking his time is a welcome change. The tears have more or less dried up, but the fragility remains. Their bodies are practically tied together, chest to chest as Jayce steadily rocks his hips, and his mental state warps it into something romantic.

This is just like New Year’s. It feels like he’s my boyfriend again, Viktor thinks in the heat of the moment, digging his nails into Jayce’s shoulders. I can just pretend… for the night.

The rolls of Jayce’s hips are languid, unhurried, and it sets Viktor’s insides on fire. His orgasm builds deep in his core, only to be encouraged more by Jayce thumbing his cock in time with his thrusts. Viktor moans passionately into Jayce’s mouth, sliding his tongue against the other man’s. Moving one hand from Jayce’s shoulder, he combs his fingers through his soft, dark hair, receiving a soft sigh in response. It’s intimate and tender, and more than Viktor has ever earned in his opinion, but he melts into it and lets Jayce take him however he wants. 

Jayce begins to move faster after what feels like hours of lazy thrusting, burying himself in Viktor’s cunt over and over again until his hips begin to stagger. His lips leave Viktor’s, much to his disappointment, only for him to bite the side of his neck. Viktor gasps as Jayce releases inside him, his warmth flooding his insides. Despite riding the high of his orgasm, Jayce doesn’t stop rubbing Viktor’s cock, keeping his face buried in his neck while Viktor cradles his head and holds him. His orgasm chases Jayce’s, torn out of him suddenly and devastatingly. He trembles against Jayce and cries his name, clenching around his cock still inside him. 

As soon as Viktor comes, Jayce collapses on top of him and they simply lie together and breathe. Viktor places soft kisses to Jayce’s shoulder and neck while he holds him, stroking his hair affectionately. In response, Jayce mirrors him, stroking his side and kissing where he had bitten him. 

“Te adoro,” Jayce whispers against his skin. In the haze of his afterglow, Viktor nearly misses it, but he makes a mental note to google it later. Eventually, after minutes of silent affections and recovering, Jayce slips out of Viktor and moves to get up. “I’ll get a cloth, you just stay here and be pretty.”

“‘Kay,” Viktor murmurs, stretching out. His t-shirt is still hiked up to his abdomen but he can’t be bothered to fix it or move to get the rest of his clothes. His mind is numb with pleasure in the aftermath, so he barely registers Jayce being gone for longer than a second. When Jayce comes back, he starts to clean up between Viktor’s thighs, making him let out a pleased sigh. “I’m too lazy and tired to get dressed again…”

Chuckling, Jayce tosses the cloth into Viktor’s hamper before climbing back in bed next to him. “T-shirt and socks only?”

“It’s going to have to be,” Viktor huffs out a laugh, kicking the covers closer to him so he can tuck himself in. Jayce kindly helps before throwing an arm around Viktor’s waist. “Thanks, by the way… that helped.”

“Glad I could be of assistance.” Leaning in, Jayce presses a kiss to Viktor’s cheekbone, and he can’t help but blush from the small kindness. 

A sudden yawn leaves him before he lets his eyes slip closed. “Sleep now.”

“Okay. G’night, Vik.”

“Night, Jay.”

Viktor feels sore when he wakes up the next morning. The flesh of his ass cheeks are sensitive but his hip isn’t too bad, which is a nice change. Jayce’s arm is slung over his waist and the clock reads 9:21 am. Sighing, he rolls over and buries his face in Jayce’s chest, who rouses enough to pull Viktor closer. “Mornin’ V,” he mumbles sleepily before pressing a kiss to the crown of his head. It’s comforting and a nice way to wake up on the hardest day of the year. 

I’ve lived almost half my life without her and it still hurts like it happened yesterday. He can practically hear the heart monitor in his head flatlining. I wonder what she would say about my situation... She would probably be in the same boat as everyone else.

I wonder if I would still be so closed off to relationships if she was still here.

Before he can even try to stop, tears are flowing down his cheeks. He does his best to hide it by burying his face in Jayce’s chest, but he must feel the wetness because suddenly he’s wrapping both arms around Viktor’s middle. “I’m here,” Jayce whispers, resting his chin on the top of his head while rubbing Viktor’s back. 

It isn’t long until Viktor breaks into sobs. He feels embarrassed that he can’t keep himself together in front of a man he’s casually fucking, and this is the second time in under twelve hours, but they agreed they’re more than that. Maybe it’s okay to cry in front of Jayce. Maybe he’s… maybe he’s safe to be vulnerable with.

Viktor has no concept of time for his breakdown, just cries in Jayce’s arms like the wreck he is and takes all of the comfort he can get. That’s what I do best—take, and take, and take. I’m a fucking leech. I could never date him because I’d ruin him. The thought makes the sobs rippling out of him more violent, making his voice hoarse and his body shake. 

“Hey, hey, take deep breaths,” Jayce says softly, so softly that it hurts because he doesn’t deserve Jayce’s tenderness. However, he listens, attempting to take deep breaths between his raw, broken sobs. The broad hand on his back rubs in slow circles, soothing him until eventually he’s reduced to trembling breaths and hiccups. Viktor finally relaxes, turning his head to listen to Jayce’s heart beat, soothing and grounding. 

“S-Sorry,” Viktor utters, embarrassed and overwhelmed. “I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s okay,” Jayce says as he kisses the top of Viktor’s head again. “It’s what I’m here for.”

Viktor remains quiet, taking in Jayce’s heat, the smell of sweat clinging to skin, the steady sound of his heart pumping blood through his beautifully alive body. If he died now I’d be devastated, Viktor thinks to himself and it makes him realize, oh fuck, I’ve grown attached. 

“You wanna shower then have some food?” Jayce asks quietly, continuing to rub Viktor’s back.

He mulls it over, quelling the panic inside him about being hooked on Jayce, before quietly replying, “Yeah… will you come with me?”  

“‘Course.” 

The shower feels like another round of aftercare. Jayce is so gentle and mindful when he washes Viktor’s hair, not at all bothered by the greasiness that had built up from not showering for two days. He doesn’t think he could have showered that morning either if it weren’t for Jayce’s careful hands massaging his scalp and then washing every inch of his body. Viktor returns the favour, because lathering shampoo into Jayce’s hair feels meditative. The tender kisses exchanged between rinsing off adds to the comfort.

Jayce knows what he’s doing. He’s playing the boyfriend act because he thinks that’s what Viktor needs right now… and he’s not wrong. Having a partner to go through the grief would be significantly better than doing it alone every year—it’s easy to see that after yesterday alone. But Jayce is just a stand-in. He’s doing it to be kind. And Viktor will take, take, take , as long as Jayce gives.

“What d’you wanna eat?” Jayce asks as he’s drying Viktor’s hair with a fluffy green towel. Viktor only buys large, soft towels, one of the few things he’s particular in buying luxury items of. The only other grotesque indulgences he has are coffee, self-care (shampoo, cleanser, moisturizer, etc.) and cat supplies. Rio eats better than he does.

Viktor considers the question as Jayce moves the towel down to his shoulders, capturing lingering droplets from his skin. “I could go for something comforting… I’d usually default to McDonald’s but we’re getting that tomorrow morning.”

“Anything I could make you here?”

“I don’t want you to cook for me again,” Viktor frowns.

“I’m offering, V,” Jayce says, brushing a hand over his still-damp hair.

“Maybe… we cook together? Pancakes?” Mom made pancakes every Sunday. Feels appropriate.

“Sounds good to me. I can make pancakes flawlessly,” Jayce grins confidently.

“Are you willing to bet that?” Viktor cocks a brow.

“Oh yeah. Let’s have a pancake-off. Whoever has the best pancake execution—shape, colour and flip, without flipping twice—wins.”

“What’s the stakes?”

“Uh… I.O.U. oral?”

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “You’re on. Prepare to eat me out.”

“Hey, it’s a win-win for me either way.”

After dressing in some comfortable lounging clothes, they both move to the kitchen and start the process. Viktor brews some coffee, coincidentally having bought coffee cream for a recipe he made earlier that week, before scrounging in his kitchen for things to potentially add to the pancakes. “How do you feel about strawberry pancakes?” Viktor asks, pulling out a container of fresh strawberries.

“Love ‘em. You can prepare those while I get the mix goin’?” Jayce asks, having found the mixing bowls and pancake mix already. 

“You sure? That’s the majority of it,” Viktor frowns, feeling guilty that Jayce is spending so much time and energy on him. 

“All it is is mixing a little bit of powder, liquid and an egg,” Jayce shrugs before looking around the kitchen. “Where, uh… where do you keep measuring cups?”

“Top drawer over there,” Viktor points before grabbing a knife from the knife block and a chopping board. He carries everything in one arm while walking over to the table and Jayce balks at the precarious position of the knife.

“Uh, I’m taking that, I don’t want you falling and impaling yourself,” Jayce says before carefully taking the knife from Viktor and placing it on the table.

“I was fine, nothing was going to happen,” Viktor huffs, shaking his head before sitting down. They work together quietly, strawberries being sliced while powder, milk and an egg are whisked together, though Jayce starts to hum a song that Viktor doesn’t recognize. “What song is that?”

“Hm? Oh, uh, Jaws by Sleep Token,” Jayce replies, seemingly extremely focused on getting the ratio of mix to liquid perfect. 

“Is that a band? I don’t know them.”

“Yeah. They’re kind of a metal band but their music is really eclectic. Lots of pop, alt rock and R&B influences. Jaws is a pretty slow song, at least at first.”

“What’s it about?”

“It’s, um… about a relationship where one person wants to hide all their flaws and trauma and shit, and the other is asking them to let them in, basically.”

Viktor furrows his brow, frowning. “Why’s it called Jaws?” 

“Hold on,” Jayce says, holding up a finger before getting out his phone and taps away. Sliding it over to Viktor, the lyrics for the song are open so he leans in and begins to read. The first chorus captures his attention though, where the title came from. 

Show me those pretty white jaws, show me where the delicate stops
Show me what you've lost, and why you're always taking it slow
Show me what wounds you've got, and show me love

The song hits home because he can see, plain as day, that he is the one who is supposed to show his jaws. He’s taking it slow—trying to hide the cracks in his façade—and Jayce has been asking him to be more open, in little ways. It’s like Jayce is using the world's most gentlest, non-threatening crowbar to pry the mask off. ‘Show me love’. Love. Is that what’s going on here? Is he falling in love with me? The train of thought leaves him feeling nauseous. No. They’re just song lyrics. This is not a hint. Take the rose-coloured glasses off, dumbass.

“I see,” Viktor says as he hands the phone back, doing his best not to emote. “Would you mind if… we listened to it? My smart speaker is on the kitchen counter.”

“Not at all, curious what you’d think. You like Nirvana so you might actually like Sleep Token.”

One song turns into listening to a whole album while they competitively cook pancakes. As predicted… Viktor won, claiming the I.O.U. with plans to keep it in his back pocket. By the time they’re sitting at the table and eating, they’re halfway through the album. While it’s not his typical taste, Viktor enjoys it still while sharing his every thought. It's almost noon and they’ve moved to the couch when Jayce asks him, “So, what were your favourite songs?”

“I can’t choose between Give and Take Aim. What about you?”

“Give is good but I love The Offering. Gets me hyped for the rest of the album, honestly.”

“Thanks for listening with me, by the way,” Viktor says quietly, chewing on his bottom lip. “It was… a nice distraction.”

“Of course,” Jayce says easily, bumping Viktor’s shoulder with his own. 

“Would you mind if we just kinda… chill for a bit? I wanted to sit quietly and do some puzzles.”

“Puzzles?” Grinning, Jayce glances at the coffee table to see a thick book of hard sudoku puzzles, one Viktor is only halfway through. “You like other puzzles or just sudoku?”

“Pretty much just sudoku. I like math.” Picking up the book and a pen, he leans back into the couch and gets comfortable.

“Pen? You must be confident,” Jayce teases.

“I like math and I’m really good at it,” Viktor smirks.

“D’you mind if I snoop a little?” Jayce asks, nodding toward the wide bookcase in Viktor’s living room. 

Shrugging, he replies, “Knock yourself out.”

Standing and crossing the room, Jayce looks through the collection of books, movies and TV shows Viktor has collected over the years, but it’s not the entirety of his collection. He has more in his storage closet, but the ones on the shelf are his favourites. He continues to do one sudoku puzzle after another to keep his mind occupied while Jayce explores. 

“You a Trekkie?” Glancing up at Jayce, he’s pointing at Viktor’s collection of The Next Generation on Bluray with a raised brow. 

“Only TNG. I don’t care for William Shatner or Chris Pine,” he replies, looking back down at his puzzle book.

Jayce hums in acknowledgement. “I’ve only seen the new movies and they were okay. That’s my only exposure to Star Trek.”

“That’s a shame, because TNG is the best of the Star Trek media in my opinion.” 

“I grew up with Star Wars. I was Luke Skywalker one Halloween and my best friend went as Leia. We were… eleven and seven I think?”

“You would be a Star Wars nerd,” Viktor scoffs with a playful smirk. 

“Guilty,” Jayce agrees as he peruses more. “Lord of the Rings, nice… Oh, I love The Devil Wears Prada… Hey, what’s this?”

Viktor looks over again and he’s holding a black, leatherbound eight-by-eight book. “Some of my photography.”

“Oh, cool… mind if I look?” Jayce asks hopefully.

I don’t even remember what’s in there… It could potentially be embarrassing. Then again, would it be more embarrassing than crying in his arms last night and this morning? “Go ahead.”

Sitting next to Viktor on the couch, Jayce opens the book. Viktor glances at the first page and his heart halts in his chest. In the centre of it is an image of a single yellow chrysanthemum in a vase, bright and beautiful, imperfectly perfect. Viktor remembers the day he took it. 

January 5th, 2006. She had just been admitted to the hospice. It was the first thing he brought for her.

Jayce pauses on the page, analyzing it as if Viktor’s trauma is printed in clear English on the photo itself. “Was this… taken in a hospital?”

“Hospice,” Viktor admits. He avoids thinking about it and talking about it, but… Jayce makes him want to at least acknowledge it.

“Ah,” Jayce replies quietly. He flips the page and there’s an entire bouquet next to an empty bed, captured in black and white. The light from the hallway pouring in the room leaves an eerie silhouette of a man standing in the doorway. “Let me guess… March 1st?”

“Yeah. 2006.” 

Jayce is quiet for a moment before he says, “So you were nineteen?”

“It was before my birthday.”

“That’s really young,” Jayce murmurs empathetically. At this point, Jayce can probably paint a pretty clear picture of who Viktor is: a gay, trans, disabled immigrant with an alcoholic father and a dead mom too soon. 

Even if he was interested in being my boyfriend, the amount of baggage he’s unearthing is probably enough to scare him off, Viktor thinks morosely. He doesn’t want to be blindsided, so he decides to get ahead of it. He’ll give Jayce an out so Viktor doesn’t have to be strung along. “Listen… I know this is a lot. You’re… getting a little deeper than you agreed to get with me. If you want to stop hooking up, I’d understand—”

“Whoa, whoa, what?” Jayce looks at Viktor with confusion, brows pinched together like he’s deep in thought. “Why would I want to stop seeing you because I… well, I don’t know what I know. I can only guess so much with the puzzle pieces.”

“Please, voice your hypothesis,” Viktor sighs. “I will confirm or deny.”

“Your mom died today when you were eighteen. It was just you and her because your dad was out of the picture,” Jayce says carefully, as if Viktor might shatter if he guesses correctly. “It wasn’t sudden either, was it?”

“Yeah,” Viktor says with a weak smile, putting down his sudoku book to hug his knees to his chest. “She was my best friend. Ever since it was just us we became really close—closer than we already were. It was unhealthy, though… that’s part of why it’s so hard.”

“I know what it’s like, to lose someone really young. I won’t get into it, but I understand the grief,” Jayce whispers, putting the book on the coffee table before shifting closer. Wrapping an arm around Viktor’s shoulders, he brings him closer and Viktor follows his guidance willingly. “I’m not going to bail on you just because you show me you’re human.”

“Being human isn’t sexy,” Viktor huffs, curling a hand in Jayce’s shirt.

“And you don’t need to be sexy all the time just because we’re fucking around.” Burying his nose in Viktor’s hair, Jayce continues to hold him and rub his shoulder. Quietly, against his scalp, Jayce whispers, “I care about you, that’s why I’m here.”

“Thank you,” Viktor replies softly, enjoying the feeling of Jayce’s arms around him. “I really appreciate you coming this weekend.”

“I’m glad you called me,” Jayce confesses, kissing the crown of his head as he has nearly a dozen times since he arrived yesterday. “Doesn’t matter what’s going on, I’m happy to be here for you.”

He’s going to be a good boyfriend—and husband—whenever he finds that, Viktor thinks as he focuses on Jayce’s heartbeat. The warmth he radiates makes Viktor feel comforted despite the heavy feelings weighing down his chest. 

They end up cuddling for a couple hours, Viktor continuing to do his puzzles and Jayce having picked up Viktor’s copy of Captive Prince by C.S. Pacat. When Viktor’s stomach growls, they make sandwiches and turn on the first episode of TNG. It’s the most easygoing hangout Viktor has had in recent memory. The urge to put up a front is dwindling away by the minute. They end the night on pizza delivered by a local gem and The Devil Wears Prada, which Viktor falls asleep to. 

When he wakes up with his head in Jayce’s lap, face buried in his stomach, Viktor feels disoriented. Jayce is reading again and he glances down at him with a gentle smile. “Hey sleepyhead,” he murmurs softly, running a hand over his hair. 

Viktor groans and shuts his eyes again, soaking up the affection despite all his reservations—when he’s fully awake anyway. Slightly slurring his words, he asks, “What time’s it?”

Glancing at his wristwatch, Jayce says, “It’s 11:52. We should probably get ready for bed.”

“Ugh, yeah… have to get up earlier because your ass needs to get across the bridge before nine.” 

“Your work is close by, I assume?”

“Yeah, ten minute drive. I usually roll out of bed at eight,” Viktor sighs as Jayce continues to pet his hair. “I wish I could magically just be ready for bed or work on command. Or had one of those retro futuristic stalls that shower you, brush your teeth, do your hair and skin care—the works.”

Jayce chuckles and nods. “Maybe we could combine our big brains and design one. It’d be revolutionary. Make us millionaires.”

“Ew, I don’t want to be a millionaire. If I had an excess of money I’d do something with it, like put it toward cancer research or helping people in underdeveloped countries.”

“Well, yeah, that’s the ideal. I agree with you, I’d want to change the world. But, play in the space for a minute. If you had an unlimited pool of money, what would you do with it? Something for you, nobody else.”

Viktor looks up at Jayce, pinching his brows together in thought for about thirty seconds. “The Reach.” 

“The Reach? What’s that?”

“A Macallan eighty-year-old whiskey that goes for about 650K. It was distilled in 1940.” 

“Damn,” Jayce whistles. “That’s an expensive drink. Think Vander’s got that lying around?” 

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “Absolutely not. I think the most expensive whiskey he has is a single bottle of Glenfiddich 21. Still an expensive bottle but a more reasonable luxury. He saves that for special occasions and you can’t just order it, though. VIP only,” he smirks.

“Oh, you’re VIP are you?” 

“You could say that,” Viktor shrugs, tilting his head toward Jayce. “What about you? One thing, unlimited money.”

“I think… A house in Oaxaca. A nice house but not, like, crazy over the top.” 

“Is that in Mexico?” 

“Yeah, it’s beautiful. It’s where my dad grew up,” Jayce says with a soft smile, but there’s an unspoken, almost invisible sadness to it. Viktor should be more concerned that he can distinguish the differences between Jayce’s smiles at this point. He said he knows grief. Something happened to his dad. Something he avoids, like me. What did it do to you, Jayce? Brushing off the subtle sadness in his expression, Jayce continues, “Anyway, bedtime. We can save our other fantasy luxuries for pillow talk—literal pillow talk, not sex pillow talk.”

“Could also be sex pillow talk…” Viktor bites his bottom lip enticingly, looking up at Jayce and intentionally batting his lashes.

“It’s late…” Jayce replies, biting his own lip in debate. “... And we can be quick.” 

Jayce is, in fact, quick. After they speed through getting ready for bed, he got between Viktor’s thighs and prepped him in all of two minutes. The sex isn’t as emotional as the night before, however, there’s a ravenous tenderness. It’s hard, fast and rough, but needy—always holding, always kissing, always moaning the other’s name. Viktor actually forgets that they ditched the condoms for a moment before Jayce pushes inside. Knowing what’s to come—his new favourite sensation—he chases Jayce’s orgasm just as much as his own. And, for the first time in the entire time they’ve been having sex, they come at the same time. It’s magical, almost. Viktor’s pleasure hazed brain even registers it as romantic.

The orgasm is almost as intense as the night before—almost—and leaves him trembling. Jayce buries his face in the crook of his neck and relaxes into Viktor’s arms, kissing the hickey Viktor just remembered he had left. While it’s dangerously close to being difficult to hide, he’s sure it will be fine, and it was worth it. I like Jayce marking me as his… Even if it’s an illusion, it’s nice to pretend I’m his to claim. Combing his fingers through Jayce’s hair, Viktor takes deep breaths to recover before whispering, “Taky tě zbožňuju.”

I adore you too. That’s what Jayce had said the night before. Viktor only remembered to google it that afternoon when he was grabbing a sweater. I adore you and I don’t know when that happened. Jayce doesn’t ask him what he said, but he seems to pick up on some vague sentiment because he kisses Viktor’s pulse point and brushes his thumb over one of his mastectomy scars.

After a quick clean up, Viktor falls asleep in Jayce’s arms. His dreams are actually pleasant, featuring his mom in a field of yellow chrysanthemums waiting for him to join her for a picnic on a warm spring day. 

He jerks awake when Jayce’s alarm goes off at 6:30 am, but his bedmate’s arms wrap tighter around him. “Turn your alarm off, asshole,” Viktor nudges him. With a groan, Jayce rolls over reluctantly and turns it off. He stretches, limbs invading Viktor’s space, before he rolls over again and wraps his arm around Viktor’s middle.

“Gonna shower. You wanna come with?” Jayce rumbles in his ear, voice rough with sleep. Viktor doesn’t want to admit it, but half-awake-Jayce is its own kind of sexy. It makes him want to tell Jayce to take some PTO with him so they can fuck in bed all day.

I’m coping well if I think a sex marathon can save me from facing the real world today.

“Ugh, I’m awake so I might as well,” he concedes, sitting up and reaching down to pull off one sock after another—the only pieces of clothing he had left when they fell asleep. 

The shower is less intimate than it was the day before. It’s purely proficient on both ends to get the hell out and get coffee in their systems. While they take turns with Viktor’s lone dying hairdryer that he’s been meaning to replace for a year, they build their McDonald’s cart and order. When Viktor is buttoning up his dress shirt and watching Jayce, already fully dressed, put his watch back on, he has an odd sensation. 

Imagine if this was our life, he thinks. What he can only describe as a yearning for domesticity pools in his chest at the sight, continuing to observe Jayce fussing with his hair in Viktor’s full-length mirror. We shower together. We get ready for work together. We order-in breakfast. You offer me half of your hash brown again and say you’re full, but I know. You did it because you know it’s my favourite. And I would judge whatever sugary disaster of a beverage you ordered. But I like those things about you. 

“Vik?” Jayce says his name, getting him to snap out of his rose-tinted daydream. 

“Yeah?” Viktor blinks, recovering from the clouds his head called home moments ago. It wasn’t based entirely on imagination, though. The fantasy had actual patterns between them. How far from domesticity are we?

“You okay? You were just staring.” The other man looks concerned, furrowing his brows in question. 

“Yeah… Spaced out, sorry.” 

“‘Kay…”

When breakfast has been eaten (and Viktor’s predictions come true), Jayce heads to the door in a navy suit, baby blue shirt and silver tie—something Powder would wear if she dressed masculine. He ties on his shoes before shouldering his duffle bag. “I’ll text you later to check in,” he says, looming in Viktor’s airspace. 

“Okay. Drive safe.”

“Always do,” Jayce whispers softly before cupping Viktor’s jaw and leaning in to kiss him tenderly. It’s purely instinct to put his crutch aside and wrap his arms around Jayce’s neck, holding him close, despite the fact that the kissing goodbye thing is still new. Jayce’s free hand squeezes Viktor’s waist where he’s ticklish, pulling a surprised squeak and giggle out of him to break the kiss.

“You tickled me, asshole,” Viktor chastises him, smacking him on his left pec hidden beyond cotton. 

“Sorry, sorry, not intentional,” Jayce says with a grin before pressing one kiss to his cheek, then the mole on his cheekbone. “Have a good day at work.”

“You too,” he responds before seeing Jayce off and hearing his car leave the driveway. Viktor stands in the entry hall of his home and runs a hand through his hair. “He’s not your boyfriend. Get it together.”

“What’s that?” Powder asks, sitting across from him at his desk later that afternoon. 

“What’s what?” Viktor responds, his head turned to the right as he looks through his top drawer for a sticky note pad.

Suddenly, Powder’s hand is at his shirt collar, pulling it down to look at him incredulously. “You… did you see him this weekend?”

Shit. The hickey on my neck. “I… um… yeah, I did,” he says as he pulls back, looking up at her with a frown. “Look, it’s—”

“So when Pops said you were getting milk… you were with him, weren’t you?” Her brows arch angrily and she accuses him. “You didn’t want me to know, did you?”

Viktor is silent for a long moment before he sighs. “Yes, I was with him and I didn’t want Silco to tell you.”

Grinding her teeth together, she gathers her laptop and things before storming out of his office without another word, returning to her station in the main lab. Running a hand over his hair in exasperation, he hunches over his desk and then buries his face in his hands. “Fuck.”

His phone buzzes. One glance tells him it’s Jayce, of course.

Monday 1:47 PM

J 🌹
hey
how u doin?

V ❤️‍🔥
Okay.
Not the best, not the worst.

J 🌹
sometimes that’s the best we can hope for

V ❤️‍🔥
Yeah, that’s a good way of putting it.
Thanks again, by the way.
You made this weekend tolerable.   

J 🌹
glad i could help
i’d like to see u again this wknd
lmk if ur free
i know i just saw u but i wanted to get first dibs 😘

V ❤️‍🔥
I’ll let you know.
❤️

J 🌹
❤️

He finally decided to make his mom’s chicken paprikash. It’s been a while, and he wanted to this weekend, but he was preoccupied with Jayce and grief.

When he sits down to enjoy his comfort meal, his phone buzzes. Viktor expects it to be Jayce again but… it’s Powder. She hasn’t spoken to him since that afternoon, unless necessary.

Monday 7:25 PM

Pow 🦋
im really hurt
and mad at u

Vik 🐐
Okay.
Let’s talk about it.

Pow 🦋
u chose to call ur not-bf over me
ME
i would understand if u chose to call sky and not me bc she actually knew ur mom
but u called a dude u met 5 months ago??
y did u choose him over us?

Vik 🐐
Because ‘nerdy hunk’ could give me things you can’t.
He didn’t know exactly why I was in such a bad way, and I liked that.
He didn’t ask me invasive questions, he didn’t try to get me to talk about it.
He made me dinner. He watched TV with me. I had a warm body to hold on to. 

Pow 🦋
i need u to b so fuckin for real rn
what is he to u?

Vik 🐐
I’m not sure.
To hopefully get you to understand, I will tell you something I wanted to take to my grave.

Pow 🦋
???

Vik 🐐
I’ve been playing pretend with him.
Pretending he’s my boyfriend. 
Pretending there’s something more between us.
Pretending that I’m not lonely.
It feels good. It’s an escape, especially when I feel like my professional life is falling apart and I’m miserable about something I used to love and was fulfilled by.
I have a feeling he’s pretending too.
So, what we have isn’t real. It’s a mirage. It seems one way but it will disappear eventually. There’s nothing there.

Pow 🦋
vik
thats fucked
like delulu and unhealthy

Vik 🐐
Yeah. Exactly why I didn’t want to tell anyone.
Exactly why I’m exhausted by the claims that he IS my boyfriend.
It feels like a slap in the face because I’m pretending he is, but he will never be.
And then I question why I’m even disappointed by that.
I think it’s because he’s the only good thing I have going for me right now.
He makes me happy, even just for the weekend. 
He’s my coping mechanism, not my boyfriend.

Pow 🦋
hes not charlie 2.0 is he?

Vik 🐐
No, because we agreed we’re ‘companions’. 
No strings attached, just mutually agreed company.
And I sincerely doubt he will fall in love with me like Charlie did. 
I’m sorry for hurting your feelings, but I chose what I thought was the best decision for me at that moment.
It was nothing against you.

Pow 🦋
i forgive u
i bug u abt the bf thing bc i want u to be happy
u seem rly happy whenever u see him

Vik 🐐
Thank you for your forgiveness.
I am happy when I see him because he’s distracting me from my problems.
At least it’s not booze.

Pow 🦋
i mean… ya

Vik 🐐
Are we good?

Pow 🦋
ya
thx for being real w me
i know u hate opening up and shit

Vik 🐐
Eh. It’s easier with you and Sky, you know that.
Please don’t tell her what I told you.
Ever since my mom died, she’s tried to fill that hole in me, which unfortunately includes her trying to give me healthy life advice that I absolutely don’t want.
It’s not her fault either, it’s my own stubborn shit.
I’m well aware I’m being ridiculous about this situation and it will most likely blow up in my face eventually.
I’m trying to enjoy it while it lasts.

Pow 🦋
it doesnt have to end

Vik 🐐
It’s not about having to.
It will.
It’s inevitable.
And I’m okay with that.

Chapter Text

Wednesday, April 3rd, 2020

“You said you go by your last name, correct?” Jayce asks while sitting opposite of a middle-aged man with interesting facial hair and a balding head.

“Yes, it’s Hoskel,” the man says with a sort of… condescending air to him. 

Maybe I’m misreading his first impression. “Nice to meet you, Hoskel. I’m Jayce,” he says politely. He never got used to this whole interviewing thing—Mel and Heimerdinger are far better at it, in his opinion, but they can’t do all of the interviews. He’s looking for a counterpart, so he at least needs to be more personally involved. “First of all, can you tell me a bit about yourself?”

“Of course. I’m a Harvard graduate with twenty years of experience in the bioengineering field. I’ve led teams from—”

“Look, that’s great and all, but I can read all that on your resume. Who are you? Not your career.” 

“Well, I’m… a father of two. I like classic poetry and Greek philosophy. I collect geodes. And I play tennis on the weekends with my wife.”

Oh, we actually have some things in common… Viktor used to be obsessed with Greek philosophers when he was twelve. I still think that’s cute. Most twelve year olds like Pokémon, but no, Viktor needed to be reading at the twelfth grade level before he hit puberty. These days, it’s hard to go even five minutes without thinking of Viktor. His entire inner monologue has been invaded by the other man. “That’s great. I collect gems, been a bit of a fixation of mine since I was young. I also just started playing tennis this year, when I have the time, that is.”

“Oh, very good. What’s your favourite gem?”

“I love the Mali garnet.” I already liked it but now it reminds me of Viktor’s eyes. “You?”

“I do enjoy a rose quartz. I have a few geodes of rose quartz in my study at home.”

“I don’t blame you, rose quartz is beautiful. Do you also like the meanings of the stones?”

“I don’t believe in that mumbo jumbo crap. All I care about is whether or not it’s pretty,” Hoskel lets out a booming laugh like he’s the funniest guy in the room. “All these new age types and their witchcraft and astrology—it’s a plague, I say. Especially being this close to Salem of all places.”

Jayce doesn’t think it’s funny and frowns. Awfully judgemental over something as harmless as spiritual beliefs. Last week Viktor listened to me talk about gems and their different meanings for almost an hour. He said he doesn’t believe in it either, but he was still interested in the history and cultural significance, and asked me questions, because you don’t have to believe in something to take interest.

“Right,” Jayce replies tensely, feeling personally slighted, however he stifles the feeling in favour of professionalism. Even if he does want to call Hoskel an asshole. Glancing down at his notes, Jayce clears his throat and asks, “Now for a more serious question. Can you tell me what your greatest flaw is?”

“Oh, um…” Hoskel pauses, sweat visible under his collar, which leaves Jayce curious. “I would say I’m too dedicated to my work. Some may call me a workaholic.”

That sounds like bullshit… “What drives you to be so dedicated to your work?” 

“Um, well… I… I like making a difference in the world!” The man says it as though he’s grasping at straws. He recovers and straightens his spine, a smug expression crossing his aged face. “Yes, the greater good is what I strive for.”

He’s either bullshitting me or he’s just not good at interviews.

The interview continues in a questionable way. Jayce is on the fence whether or not Hoskel is sincere, which should be a red flag. However, his credentials are impressive and they do have a couple laughs during their conversation. When he says goodbye to the man, he’s about sixty percent certain he would make a good fit, even if he is kind of a dick. Maybe that’s a little too low in confidence for someone I’m supposed to see a minimum of forty hours a week. 

“Wait, hold up… was that Hoskel?” Ekko, a young chemical engineer they only hired two months ago, asks as he stares after the older man when he leaves through the doors.

Jayce’s brows pinch together. “Uh, yeah, you know him?” 

“Yeah, uh, he works at the place I interned at,” Ekko grimaces. “What was he doing here?”

“Job interview… what was he like?”

Suddenly, Ekko looks a little nervous, which is unlike him. “Um… You’re not going to like what I have to say.”

“I think I need to hear it if I’m going to consider working with him.”

“I mean, from what I experienced… dude didn’t even lift a finger. He had us interns doing all the work.”

I fucking knew he was bullshitting about the ‘too dedicated’ flaw. “Uh huh…” Without hesitation, Jayce takes Hoskel’s resume from his file folder and tosses it in the nearest recycling bin next to reception.

“Another bust, huh?” Lest, a lynx-like vastaya woman and the head receptionist, asks as she turns in her chair to face him. She overhears every conversation in the office and, as a result, she’s the biggest gossip too. Jayce, admittedly, has indulged occasionally, when he’s not the subject of the gossip… which has been too often.

“You could say that,” he sighs.

“I didn’t like his vibe anyway,” she shrugs.

“Oh, trust me, his vibes are rancid,” Ekko chuckles. 

“Well, there goes our most qualified candidate then. I’ll ask Elora about any other new applicants,” Jayce says with defeat before looking at Ekko. “Thanks for the honesty, you definitely helped me dodge a bullet.” 

“No prob, boss.”

“It’s just Jayce,” he reminds Ekko, smiling warmly. He’s quickly growing fond of Ekko. He’s brilliant, kind and funny. Despite their professional dynamic, he’s hoping he can make a friend out of the younger man. Jayce doesn’t have many of those these days.

“Then, no prob, Jayce,” Ekko nods before heading back into the lab.

“He’s adorable,” Lest says casually. “Seems like he looks up to you.” 

“Yeah, well, the admiration is mutual. He’s a genius in his own right. He could very well have my job in five years—bet you anything.” 

“Mhm… How long do you think Mel will let you stay out of the bureaucratic bullshit?”

Jayce sighs again, rubbing his forehead. “I had hoped indefinitely but… she’s been asking me about rethinking not being upper management. I don’t wanna be, but there might come a day where I have to be, especially as Hextech grows.” 

“I know you love working in the lab, but it could be rewarding to be the puppet master behind R&D.”

“When you put it like that, I hate the idea even more,” Jayce laughs, shaking his head. “It’s a conversation for another day, one I’ve been avoiding. Anyway, I gotta get back to work—I have about a million emails to reply to.” 

“Good luck,” she waves him off with her purple painted nails as he heads back to his office, adjacent to the lab.

He spends the next hour and a half answering a slew of emails. Most of them are his supplier contacts for their project—chemicals, steel parts, electronic components, so on and so forth. Before he knows it, it’s almost 6 pm and he’s starting to feel the weight of a full-day’s work of mind-numbing management tasks. He’s itching to be in the lab, but it’s a little late to start anything unless he wants to be at the office until eleven again.

“Jayce?” Mel calls to him, prompting him to look up from his desk to the doorway. She’s dressed in a black pantsuit paired with her vintage red Prada heels and a matching lipstick. She always brings a sharp elegance to the office that makes her look powerful and formidable. It’s one of the many things he admires about her, after her intellect and instincts.

“Hey Mel, what’s up?” Leaning back in his chair, he lowers his laptop screen to give her his full attention.

“I know we were supposed to go to the movies on Friday but… Elora’s mother decided to pay her a surprise visit and is insisting we go to dinner that night.” Mel’s lips twitch with annoyance. “Trust me, I would much rather hang out with you but I’m not leaving my girlfriend alone with a demon.”

“Well, maybe I’ll learn not to buy tickets days in advance then,” Jayce huffs out a laugh before shrugging. “It’s all good, I’ll see if someone else is free. I don’t think it’ll be Cait’s thing, but I’ll check.”

“Thank you for being understanding. I’ll treat you next time. Dinner next week maybe?”

“Yeah, let me know your schedule and we’ll figure something out. And no problem.”

“Maybe you can take that mystery man of yours,” she teases, prompting Jayce’s cheeks to turn pink. Mel knows he’s casually seeing someone, but not the details. She doesn’t need to know that they’re technically just fuck buddies. And she doesn’t need to know that he’s progressively started to feel something for him. Cait, on the other hand, has been his confidante through what Jayce is calling ‘The Viktor Situation’. 

“Yeah, maybe,” Jayce agrees bashfully, scratching his cheek. “Anyway, good luck exorcising the demon.”

“Thank you.”

Once Mel is gone, Jayce grabs his phone and immediately opens his messages with Viktor.

Wednesday 6:12 PM

J 🌹
hey listen
i have 2 tickets to a quiet place 2 on fri
my friend was supposed to go with me but she had something come up
do u wanna go with me?

V ❤️‍🔥
Do I have to have seen the first one?

J 🌹
well… yea kinda
u could watch it then decide?

V ❤️‍🔥
Okay.
I would prefer to watch it with you but we’re on a time crunch. 

J 🌹
why can’t we just do what harry and sally did?

V ❤️‍🔥
What?
Like watch the movie while on the phone?

J 🌹
yea 
i’m free around 8:30

V ❤️‍🔥
Tonight?

J 🌹
why not?

V ❤️‍🔥
Alright.
I can do 8:30.

It’s 8:34 when Jayce opens his laptop, sitting up comfortably in bed, already in his PJs. He puts in his AirPods and opens FaceTime before calling Viktor, audio only. It rings for a few moments before Viktor answers. 

“Hey, handsome,” Viktor’s voice comes through his earbuds, his faded European accent music to Jayce’s ears.

A grin stretches across his lips from the greeting because just hearing Viktor’s voice puts him in a good mood. “Hey, beautiful, how was your day?”

“Ugh. Fucking awful. I had to do a fucking presentation for a project I resent, to investors I fucking hate, and I was debating jumping out the window the entire time.”

“Jesus, you really hate your job now, huh?”

“Yeah, which is a shame because I used to love it. That was before I got this piece of shit as my new boss. He’s been here for all of eight months and he’s already flipped the school on its ass.”

Jayce blinks, slowly analyzing what Viktor said. “... You work at a school? Wait, do you work at Zaun U?”

There’s silence on the other line for a long moment before he hears Viktor utter a familiar curse word in a language Jayce has been trying to figure out for months. He’s tried googling certain phrases he’s heard come out of Viktor’s mouth but he can never seem to guess the spelling. All he knows is it’s Slavic, but not Russian. Polish and Czech are his top two guesses at the moment. “I didn’t mean to… um… yes. I’m a researcher at the University.”

“Wait, wait, I think I read an article about this. He’s pro-police, right? It was a super controversial hire. Is that part of why you don’t like him?”

“Yes. He’s a boot-licking pig lover.”

“Fuck, I am so sorry. Let me guess, he took PPD money?”

“Worse. Military.”

“Oh.”

“I’m not working on anything that can be weaponized—” He cuts himself off, pausing. “No, what I should say is, from how much I’ve thought about it, I don’t think it can be weaponized. But I still hate the idea of having anything to do with the military-industrial complex,” Viktor says before sighing. “So much for you not finding out what I do for work.”

“Well, you were still vague. I don’t know what kind of research you’re doing so I don’t really know what field you work in.”

“True.”

“Want me to make it even?”

A pause. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“I’m actually a researcher too, technically. Among other things.” 

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah. I have my own R&D company that I founded seven years ago.”

“But you were… twenty-four? That’s… okay, yeah, that’s impressive.”

“Eh, I had help. I had a friend and a mentor help launch it.”

“Alright, I think I’ve heard enough personal details. Are we watching this or what?”

“Yeah, I’ll message you the link to the watch party.” Moments later he sends the link to Viktor through their messages, already with the movie queued. “Let me know when you’re ready.”

“I googled this movie because I hadn’t heard of it. I live under a rock when it comes to new movies because I watch all the same old ones. I didn’t realize Jim from The Office could direct.”

“Oh yeah, he’s a pretty good director I think.”

“It’s a scary movie, right? I will say, I like psychological thrillers but scary movies aren’t usually my thing.”

“It’s cool if you don’t like it. I can try to pawn off my ticket to someone else.”

“I didn’t say I wouldn’t go if I don’t like it,” Viktor chuckles. “If it keeps me interested enough, I will still consider going with you.”

“How generous. Would offering to drive you and buy you snacks also entice you?”

“Hmm, I do think it sweetens the pot, yes.”

“Are you sitting in a dark room?”

“No, I have my bedside lamp on. Should I turn it off?”

“It’s for the best viewing experience, I think,” Jayce says as he sinks into his pillows further. “I’m ready when you are.”

“Ahoj, prdelička,” he hears Viktor coo in his ear, followed by an audible click. “Alright, lights are off and Rio’s here to keep me safe since you aren’t.”

“I don’t know how good of a job she’ll do,” he chuckles before hitting play.

As soon as the family walking bare foot comes on screen, Viktor says, “I already hate this.”

“What? Why?”

“Bare feet? In dirt? Are they trying to upset me? My skin is crawling at the idea.”

Laughing, Jayce says, “You’re cute.”

“No, I’m autistic.”

“You can be both.”

They watch in silence for a while until… “Oh fuck,” Viktor breathes when the youngest child’s toy begins making noise. When, finally, the child is snatched, Viktor lets out an audible gasp. “Oh, that’s fucked up. Jim, why’d you kill a kid?”

Jayce chuckles wholeheartedly. “For the drama and the trauma.” I love watching movies with him. He always has the best commentary and makes me laugh. 

“I could survive this, by the way. I’m good at being quiet.”

“Not in bed, you aren’t,” he teases.

“… God, you’re right. I’d have sex once and they would get me, easily.”

They go back and forth during the movie, however they’re quiet during the especially tense moments. When Emily Blunt’s water breaks, Viktor says, “Oh god, this is the worst time for a baby to show up. Jay, I’m so fucking tense right now.” And, when she steps on a nail, it’s kinda cute how Viktor panics. “Oh no, no, no, no. That would be it for me. I would be dead because I would fucking scream.”

“Honestly, same. You could say she’s… tough as nails for staying quiet,” Jayce grins, snickering at his own joke.

“That was a terrible joke. You should be ashamed,” Viktor says but he snorts nonetheless. It’s a beautiful sound, one Jayce will never get tired of.

When John Krasinski dies, he hears a sniff on the other line but Jayce doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t want to shame Viktor for getting emotional from the movie, obviously, but if he points it out Viktor might feel that way. So, they remain silent for the majority of the rest of the film.

When it’s over, Jayce finally asks, “So, what did you think?”

“I liked it, I thought it was an interesting concept,” Viktor says as though he’s pleasantly surprised. “I’ll be honest, I probably wouldn’t have watched it of my own volition, but I enjoyed watching it with you.”

“I’m glad. So, how you feelin’ about going with me on Friday?”

“I’m willing, on the condition that transportation and sustenance is provided.”

“You wanna stay over after? And how’s dinner sound before the movie?”

“Yeah, I’ll bring an overnight bag. And that depends, what are you thinking?”

“Well, what do you want?”

“Would you judge me if I said I’d love to have breakfast for dinner?”

“Not at all. I know a good diner that serves all day breakfast.”

“Then it’s a plan.”

“Alright. The movie’s at nine, so if I pick you up at 6:30 we should have plenty of time to drive back to Piltover and eat.”

“Good because I hate being rushed.”

“Thanks for watching with me, by the way. I had fun.”

“Yeah, uh… thanks for thinking of me. I mean, when your friend cancelled.”

“It’s no problem. Honestly, no offense to her, but… I think I’m gonna have a lot more fun with you.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re getting your dick wet too,” Viktor snorts.

“Not at all!” He replies indignantly. “I mean it, I have a lot of fun hanging out with you. The sex is just a bonus.”

“Well… I, um, I feel the same way,” Viktor admits quietly, and Jayce can practically picture him chewing on his bottom lip, a nervous habit he noticed months ago. “I’m gonna go because I want to read a little bit before I crash.”

“Whatcha reading?”

“The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. It’s the story of Achilles but gay.”

“Doesn’t he have a tragic end?”

“Yes, I don’t usually read sad romances but this one comes highly rated.”

“Could I borrow it when you’re done?”

“Sure. I’m almost finished so I’ll bring it with me on Friday.”

“Cool. I’ll let you go now, then. I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me too. Night, Jay.”

“Night, Vik.”

When he hangs up, he tilts his head back and sighs. Is this a date? It feels like a date. It’s been feeling like we’ve been dating since Christmas Eve. 

Pulling out his phone, he opens his texts with Cait.

Jayce 🤓
i think i just planned a date with vik on fri

He only has to wait a minute for a response.

Sprout 🌱
Oh shit
Like an ACTUAL date
Or are you deluding yourself again?

Jayce huffs indignantly while he responds. 

Jayce 🤓
i don’t think i’m deluding myself to begin with
i think he’s into me
we didn’t call it a date
but i’m taking him to dinner + a movie 

Sprout 🌱
So… he didn’t say it was a date?
🤔

Jayce 🤓
well… no
but
that’s a DATE right?

Sprout 🌱
Or it’s just friends hanging out 😔

Jayce 🤓
ok but
up until now he’s turned down going to dinner
but when i asked him he agreed
no “i’m not ur bf” or anything like that

Sprout 🌱
Okay, but…
He didn’t say it was a date either

Jayce 🤓
just let me have this 🙄

Sprout 🌱
Alright
I’ll let you delude yourself further
👌

Jayce 🤓
ugh
u and ur logic

Sprout 🌱
Good luck on your “date” 
🤭

Friday, April 5th, 2020

Viktor is standing on his porch when Jayce pulls up to his house. He looks handsome, wearing a black, soft-looking t-shirt with a dark red rose print, matched with neutral beige capris and black Chuck Taylors. Picking up his green duffle bag from the ground next to him, he approaches Jayce’s car and opens the back door first. Tossing his bag in unceremoniously, he then gets in the front passenger seat, keeping his crutch between his legs and the car door. “Hey.” 

“Hey, beautiful,” Jayce says, leaning in to greet Viktor with a kiss. He returns the kiss tenderly, cupping Jayce’s cheek and stroking his beard—a sensation that practically makes him weak in the knees. When they part, Jayce grins at him. “You look cute, florals look good on you.”

“Thank you. You look pretty handsome yourself,” Viktor grins back with a faint flush in his cheeks, his hand travelling down Jayce’s neck to his pec. Jayce chose a forest green short sleeved button-up for himself, knowing it’s one of Viktor’s favourite shades, paired with some dark jeans. He shivers as Viktor’s index finger draws circles over Jayce’s heart and he whispers, “I can’t wait to get you out of this.”

“We have dinner and a movie to get to first, but I promise you will later,” he replies before picking up Viktor’s hand and kissing his knuckles. “I didn’t get to ask you how your day was.”

Viktor takes back his hand and sighs, leaning back into the seat. “Oh, you know, the usual misery. Doing a lot of boring management stuff right now. The asshole is trying to get me to make our team leaner but also more efficient at the same time. I told him I wasn’t firing anyone and he got pissed at me.”

Pulling out of Viktor’s driveway, Jayce starts to drive towards the Lanes. “Do you think he’d fire you if you push back too much?”

“Oh, he absolutely wants to fire me, I can tell. However, he knows he’d be a fucking idiot and his precious military project would be off schedule. I’m too qualified to let go and the only person that could replace me is my assistant. He also knows if he fired me, she’d quit, and they’d be fucked until they can find a good enough replacement.”

“You some kind of specialist or something?”

“Sort of. I have a PhD in my field and I’ve been working there for eight years, so I have a lot of experience.”

“Oh, shit, you’re a doctor? That’s hot,” Jayce grins. 

“Thanks… A little birdie told me you might be a doctor as well,” Viktor mentions coyly. 

Huh. He’s not usually so open about our professional lives. “You may have heard correctly,” he shrugs casually. “I only finished it four years ago.” 

“I finished mine seven years ago. Like I mentioned, skipping grades helped me get ahead.”

“You seem very… professionally driven. Have you always been like that?”

“Basically. It started in school and swiftly transitioned into work. Growing up, me and my mom weren’t the poorest, but she was a single parent supporting a disabled child. I saw myself as… a burden. I wanted to fight my way to a position of power and respect, and most importantly of all, financial stability.”

“I don’t mean to like, stroke your ego or kiss your ass or anything, but… you amaze me, y’know that?” Jayce glances over at Viktor, gauging his reaction, only to receive a look of confusion in response.

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, just… everything I’ve learned about you, you just seem like… no, what I should say is I admire you. I know you’ve gone through a lot of hardship, and I’m not saying this to rub it in or anything, just, um… I don’t think I could have gone through half the shit you’ve gone through and come out the other side as well-adjusted as you are.” 

Surprisingly, Viktor barks out a laugh, shaking his head in Jayce’s periphery. “What? What’s so funny?”

“Well-adjusted my ass,” Viktor says between giggles. “Jayce, you only think I’m half as broken as I am because I hide the most awful parts of myself from you. Trust me, I’m hardly well-adjusted.” 

“I don’t think you’re broken at all,” Jayce frowns, not finding it funny. He doesn’t know his own worth. He doesn’t know how much I adore him. “I’m serious, Vik. I think you’re brave, smart, funny, caring—I could go on about all the positive things I think of you. I don’t think you give yourself enough credit.”

Viktor’s smile disappears and he goes quiet, leaning against the passenger side door while looking out the window. “Half the time I think people only value me because of my intellect. Why else would they keep a crippled asshole around?”

“You’re not an asshole.”

“Yes, Jayce, I am an asshole. I’m only nice to you because you’re fucking me,” Viktor huffs stubbornly.

“I can see why you’d maybe go easy on me, but I do think you’re genuinely kind and considerate.”

“Are you projecting? It feels like you’re the one always taking care of me and treating me.” 

“Not true. You treat me to dinner and great head,” Jayce chuckles playfully, trying to lighten the conversation. “In all seriousness, you’re not the only one getting something out of this, other than sex I mean. I like taking care of you. For me, it feels good to take care of someone… to be needed, or at least wanted.”

Viktor is silent for a minute while he stares out the window as they drive down Janna Lane, past The Last Drop. When he finally speaks, his voice is dim and fragile. “You’re really not doing it just because you pity me, or you feel like you owe it to me?”

“Absolutely not. You’ve lived over thirty years without me in the picture. You’ve got your own home, an impressive job, a spoiled princess, and you’ve been through hell. I know you’re more than capable on your own,” Jayce reassures, reaching over the centre console to take Viktor’s hand. Their eyes meet briefly and Viktor hesitantly reciprocates the affection, holding in return.

“I… appreciate you saying that. And all the compliments. I’m curious though… why do you like taking care of me? I would just think, since you’re so stressed and busy, you’d want to be taken care of instead.”

“I’m not saying I don’t like being taken care of. You have taken care of me, even if you didn’t realize it. I just… I dunno. It feels good. I won’t get into what kind of work I do but, it’s helping people. I’ve always wanted to help people. So, taking care of the people I care about feels like that,” Jayce shrugs, drumming his fingers on the wheel. “Maybe it’s, fuck, egotistical or something, but it makes me feel good about myself? Like, getting to even improve someone’s day even a little bit makes me feel proud and… like my life’s worth something, y’know?” 

“You don’t think your life’s worth something unless you’re doing things for other people?” When Jayce glances over at Viktor, his brows are furrowed in concern. 

He has no idea. Nobody knows I almost jumped from this goddamn bridge, he thinks as he starts to drive over the bridge from Zaun to Piltover. “I… I guess I put value on my own life based on what I’m contributing to the world? Like, I want to leave this world a better place, not make it worse like a lot of people seem determined to do.”

His stomach flutters a little when he feels Viktor’s thumb brush over the side of his own, and he squeezes in response. “I know how you feel. I’ve felt like… a waste of space my whole life, like a thing people had to take care of out of obligation. I did think I was only worth my intellect, maybe I still do, so I was pretty young when I decided I was going to at least do something good with it.”

“This project you’re working on… it’s not just that it’s military, is it?” Jayce asks, but Viktor doesn’t respond. Continuing, he guesses, “It’s not doing anything you would deem as making the world a better place, right?”

“Yeah. It’s very self-serving for the military,” Viktor quietly admits. “In theory, it could have other applications that could help people, but that’s not what they’re interested in.” 

“Since you’re a specialist in your field, I imagine the job opportunities worth your experience aren’t extremely common?” 

“Eh… to be honest, I haven’t looked.” 

“What? Why not?”

Viktor lets out a heavy sigh. “I’m really bad with change and major decisions. Even though I hate my job, I still feel… stuck in it. Like, this is what I deserve and I’m not going to get any better elsewhere. I know that’s inaccurate, rationally, but it’s hard to… pull myself out of that mindset.” He pauses before letting out a small laugh. “You know, all my family and friends call me a goat. They even have the goat emoji next to my name in their phones, because I’m as stubborn as one. They give me all kinds of advice and then say, ‘I know you’re going to do whatever you want anyway’.” 

Jayce laughs, mirroring Viktor’s earlier motion by rubbing the back of his hand. “I have my own stubborn streak. But, mostly my best friend calls me delusional because I get these big ideas in my head that just aren’t accurate or realistic. We all have our quirks,” he smirks to himself, thinking back to his conversation with Cait the other night. This still seems like a date to me. We’re holding hands and talking about our goals and flaws. That’s at least worth something. “I know you said that rationally you get it, but if it helps to hear it from someone who respects you, you do deserve better. I’ve heard schools pay shit and not only are you financially worth more, you deserve to be working on projects that excite you, make you happy, and align with your morals.”

In the corner of his eye, he can see a slight smile on Viktor’s lips. “Thank you for saying that.”

“You’re welcome. I just don’t want you jumping out of any windows to get away from shitty investor meetings.”

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head. “I promise, I won’t give the dean the pleasure of me killing myself.”

“Good. Fuck that guy.”

It’s just after seven when they reach the diner. Viktor seems pleasantly surprised when he sees it because, for downtown Piltover, it’s very average looking. It’s a retro-style diner with big windows, lots of neon lights, and even an old jukebox. In the dim spring dusk, it looks like a beacon straight out of Grease, and the building is clearly showing its age. “The Mercury Diner?” Viktor questions as he reads the bright blue and red neon sign. “I wouldn’t expect a… well, normal looking place to be in Piltover. I’ve always thought all the restaurants downtown were gentrified at this point.” 

“Yeah, this place’s been around since the ‘50s. It’s gone through some renos but they’ve kept as much of it original as possible.”

“That’s cool,” Viktor comments, going to open his door but he stops. “Oh, wait, I need to get my wallet from my bag.”

“Don’t worry about it, I got it,” Jayce says, grabbing his from the centre console. 

Viktor raises a brow at him. “You already bought tickets, you’re buying snacks, and you drove me. You’re not also buying dinner.” 

“Yes, I am,” Jayce says before grabbing Viktor’s jaw and turning his head so he can kiss his cheek. Grinning, he continues, “I’m not arguing. Just shut up and let me treat you.” 

A pout and a blush form on Viktor’s face as he averts his eyes. “Fine,” he grumbles. “I will treat you next time, though.”

Next time. So, this isn’t a one-off, Jayce thinks to himself with a giddiness stirring in his gut. “Deal.” 

Viktor chooses a booth close to the jukebox, next to one of the windows overlooking the busy street that is coming alive with the setting sun. The first thing he asks is, “How bad is the coffee here?”

“Oh, you’re going to hate it,” Jayce grins. “Slightly better than Denny’s.”

“I’ll tolerate it,” Viktor huffs in amusement, grabbing one of the menus tucked against the wall. “What’s good here?”

“I honestly don’t know if anything is bad,” Jayce replies, grabbing his own menu despite already being pretty confident in what he wants. “What kind of breakfast do you like?” 

“Basically, typical American. Give me bacon, eggs, hash browns or pancakes any day, any time, and I’ll eat it.” With amusement, Jayce watches Viktor study the menu as if it’s an advanced physics test, his brows pinched together adorably. Viktor seems to notice, glancing up at Jayce from where he’s hunched over the table. “What?”

“You’re just cute, is all,” he grins.

“What are you talking about?” Sitting up, Viktor tilts his head with an arched brow, perplexed. “I’m reading a menu, Jayce.”

“Yeah, but you get this cute dimple between your eyebrows when you’re really focused on something. And you’re studying the menu like an academic paper.” 

“I… there’s a lot of choices. I’m starting to get decision paralysis,” Viktor frowns.

I’ve read about this… I’m pretty sure it’s common with autism? Thinking on how best to help Viktor decide, he goes with the scientific method: process of elimination. “Do you want candy at the movies?”

“... Huh?”

“I’ll help you choose. Do you want candy?”

Viktor chews his bottom lip before saying, “Peanut M&Ms.”

“And you’re getting soda, right? So, if you got a sweet breakfast, it might be like, sugar overload.”

“Okay, that narrows it down to just savoury breakfasts… I know I want hash browns and eggs but I don’t know what meat. Do I want ham or bacon? Both is too much for me.”

“How ‘bout we share? You give me half your ham, I give you half my bacon?”

A small smile appears on Viktor’s lips before he nods. “Then, I’m going to get the number three.”

“I’ll match you,” Jayce says, putting the menu back after barely having looked at it.

It’s only a minute later that the waitress comes by to pour them some coffee and take their orders. Jayce gets over easy eggs, bacon and brown toast, while Viktor gets scrambled, ham and sourdough. When Viktor takes his first sip of coffee after she’s left, he wrinkles his nose only slightly. “Not the worst. Better than that Target garbage you bought.”

“You’re lucky we don’t live together because I keep my kitchen stocked with… basically the cheapest flavoured coffee I can get.”

“You’re right, I am lucky I don’t live with you because there’s no way I’d want to be living in the sky,” Viktor snorts.

“Hey, who said I wanted to live in the sky? I’d happily trade my condo to live in your little house,” Jayce says teasingly, though part of him thinks, I’m crazy enough to move in with him tomorrow. That’s how infatuated with him I am. I can’t tell him that though, he’d freak out. Rightfully so. Slow the fuck down, Talis.

Viktor gives him a curious look and a humoured smile before he says, “Well, my house is only a one bed, one and a half bath. Are you planning on sleeping in my bathtub?”

“Uh, no, I’d obviously sleep with you.” Jayce quirks a brow at him. “We already sleep together, what’s the difference?”

“The difference is sharing. I get to sprawl out five or six nights of the week.”

“Please, you do the opposite. Whenever I’m up first, you’re curled up in a ball until you wake up.” 

“Okay, whatever, that might be true but my house is barely big enough for me and Rio.”

“Then, guess we’ll just have to get a new house,” Jayce grins. “C’mon, what’s your dream house?”

Viktor rolls his eyes. “Are we really playing this game?”

“Yeah, money’s no object. If you could have the house of your dreams right now, what would it look like?”

After a moment, Viktor seems to quickly give in. “Well… I wouldn’t want a mansion. Even if it were for the two of us, that’s just way too big. But… I would want lots of room. Large primary bedroom with an ensuite bathroom. Ideally—”

Shaking his head, Jayce interrupts. “Not ideally, what do you want exactly?” 

The same dimple appears in Viktor’s brow as he thinks carefully. “The bathroom would have a big jacuzzi tub that can easily fit two people. And a separate shower with a bench. Two sinks if there’s two of us because sharing a sink while getting ready for bed is annoying.”

“Alright, alright. Can I add on to the dream home?”

“I thought it was my dream home?” Viktor asks with amusement.

“Let’s treat it as a collaborative project,” Jayce says cheekily, folding his arms on the table. “I’ve always kinda wanted a living room with a conversation pit or like two different levels? Either way it needs to have a huge sectional.”

“Alright… no leather, though. And I raise you a fireplace. Preferably gas because I don’t want to have to deal with a chimney.”

“Agreed. My mom’s house has a chimney. One time a bat came out of it and I had to get it out of the house,” Jayce says as he grimaces at the memory. “Freaked me the fuck out.”

“Uh, yeah, not dealing with that. I want a pool, by the way.”

“A pool? Oooh, now we’re getting bougie. I want a nice patio for a barbecue and a fire pit.”

“Our house is turning out to have quite a few flammable things. We should make sure we have a good insurance policy,” Viktor snorts. “I want a gas range oven, a big kitchen island, and so much counter space I don’t even know what to do with it all.”

“Marble countertops?”

“Yes. Black with green cabinetry. I’ve always wanted a black and green kitchen.”

“What are you thinking for floors?”

“Wood all throughout. I do like the herringbone in my current house but I could take it or leave it. I really want dark wood, though. Walnut, maybe.”

Jayce didn’t even realize enough time had passed for the waitress to return with their order. They thank her and get top ups for their coffees and when she’s gone, Jayce adds. “Walk-in closet.”

“Must have,” Viktor smiles subtly, seemingly amused by the entire concept of the conversation even though they’re knee-deep in it. 

Wouldn’t it be funny if we ended up with our dream house, Jayce thinks as he offers his bacon to Viktor. “I want an at-home gym, just so I don’t have to go anywhere. Could be as simple as a room with a treadmill.”

“You can dream bigger than that,” Viktor chastises, taking two pieces of Jayce’s bacon before cutting his slice of ham in half and putting it on his plate. 

“Alright, alright… Treadmill, a lifting bench, a sound system, a wall-mounted TV, and y’know, maybe I’ll take up boxing. Throw a punching bag in there.”

“Now we’re talking,” Viktor nods, picking up a slice of bacon and biting into it. “Add a comfy sitting area where I can watch you.”

Jayce chuckles. “You have a thing for hot, sweaty men?”

“Uh, yeah? I’m a typical gay bottom.” He raises a brow, quickly finishing his slice of bacon.

“Okay, you get your observation deck,” Jayce chuckles, dipping his toast in his runny yoke. “Anything else?”

Squeezing some ketchup onto his scrambled eggs and hash browns, Viktor hums in thought before perking up. “We forgot the most important room.”

“And what’s that?”

“A home office, obviously. I want enough shelf space for all of my books, and a whiteboard.”

“Think you can share or do I need my own office?”

“If the room is big enough.” 

“It’s our dream home, it can be however big we want it to be.”

“Oh, it’s our dream home now?” Viktor looks amused as he digs into his crispy hash browns.

“I think I’ve contributed enough to lay claim.”

They continue to eat and talk the entire time, and even though it’s not supposed to be a date, it’s turning out to be one of the best dates Jayce has ever had already. Viktor is just so easy to talk to, and funny, and smart, and, and, and—I could name a thousand things I like about him. God, I’m in deep, aren’t I?

They spend so long talking, which they somehow end up on Jayce’s hyperfixation with gemology again and listing his favourite stones, that it’s just after eight when they return to his car. “The theatre’s only ten minutes away, so we should have plenty of time to get snacks and settle in,” he says as he starts to pull out of the parking lot.

“Okay. Thanks for dinner, by the way.” 

“It’s no problem. Like I said before, I won’t buy you a diamond watch but I’m happy to treat you to food anytime.”

“Are you always this generous with your dates?” Viktor asks teasingly. Dates. He just called this a date. “I mean… not that we’re…”

“It’s a fuck buddy date,” Jayce offers.

“Okay, I guess we can call it that.”

“To answer your question, usually. I like being the gentleman who pulls out chairs, pays for dinner, and woos. But, I haven’t really had much of that in recent years. I got too busy to date, really.”

“The last time I tried to date was when I was still finishing my PhD. I, unfortunately, have a type, and not a good one.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I like my men… well, like you. Broad, tall, buff. Unfortunately, they usually ended up being gym bros with not a lot of brains, which I thought you were at first. Plus, I got a few transphobes in the mix who didn’t realize I was trans and when they did they told me they only fucked ‘real men’.” 

“Ew. Have you ever encountered, like, fetishists?” 

“Mm… I think a couple of times. One of them I realized too late.”

“What do you mean?”

“I hooked up with him and then noticed he was being weird about it, saying how it was so much better than he imagined and shit. He tried to get me to give him my number and hook up again but I told him I don’t do that. Then he started begging.” 

“So… you really don’t hook up with people more than once, huh?” 

“No, you’re a special case.”

“I’m wondering… what made you want to hook up with me again, since you don't usually do that?”

“Curiosity. You fucked me so good the first time I thought it was a fluke so I considered it… an experiment.” 

“You were testing me?” Jayce lets out a surprised laugh.

“Yep. And you passed. I really only hooked up with you again and again because you were good in bed. Plus you… I don’t know, you were just nice and enthusiastic about my body. It made me feel good.”

“Of course I’d be enthusiastic about your body, you’re fuckin’ gorgeous.”

“Yeah, well, not everyone thinks that. I’ve gotten one too many comments about how I should eat more.”

“I assume you just have a naturally high metabolism, considering I’ve seen you eat your weight in Chinese food.” 

Viktor snorts and says, “You’re right about that. I’ve always been underweight. I’ve tried to gain weight before but it’s difficult. I remember at one point my doctor was pressuring me to eat high calorie and high protein foods and I started to hate eating.”

“That’s rough. I hope you know, like… I like our size difference but I’m not trying to fetishize how thin you are or anything like that.”

“I know. I know if I was a healthy weight you’d still get off on it. To be honest, I like that your hands are big enough to wrap around my waist and my thighs,” Viktor smirks.

“God, yeah. I got so hard I almost passed out when I first realized that,” Jayce laughs, earning a burst of laughter from Viktor as well.

They arrive at the theatre with a half-hour to spare. It’s a little busy, considering it’s prime movie date time on a Friday. As soon as they get in line, Jayce asks, “So, peanut M&Ms, Dr. Pepper, and what do you want for popcorn?” 

Viktor smiles slightly, seemingly flattered that Jayce remembered his candy choice and soda preference. “I like mine with layered butter.”

“I’m down with that. I like white cheddar powder, but I can go without.”

“Oh, we’re sharing, are we?” Viktor’s tone is teasing, making Jayce flush.

“Uh, obviously? I mean, unless you want…”

“No, I’m never able to finish a bag by myself.”

“Me neither. I’m down sharing a medium.”

“Are you getting candy?”

“Twizzlers.”

“Ew,” Viktor wrinkles his nose. “Sorry I asked.”

Laughing wholeheartedly, Jayce says, “You’re cute.”

“You seem to be the only person entertained or charmed by my picky and judgemental nature.”

Shrugging, Jayce grins. “Makes you a lil’ quirky.”

“Oh god, I’m not your manic pixie dream girl, am I?” Viktor cringes. 

“No, no. I know it’s just you being autistic but I like how opinionated you are, is all. It’s refreshing that you don’t bullshit.”

“Well, I don’t like bullshit. I try to be honest whenever possible.” 

Are you being honest about how you feel about me? Jayce can’t help but wonder, but his internal inquiry is cut off by reaching the front of the line. He orders their snacks and drinks, which Viktor clearly appreciates. He’s noticing that Viktor doesn’t like talking to strangers, which Jayce never sensed when they were just flirting and hooking up initially. But he noticed it in the grocery store last month and when he was ordering food earlier—the idea of socially interacting appeared to make him anxious. He was just masking before. He’s stopped masking with me, at least it seems that way.

After they’ve gathered their order, they find their theatre and the seats. The entrance opens to the halfway point of the escalating levels and Jayce nods to the stairs, saying, “The seats I bought are way at the top. Are you okay with the stairs or do you want to just try our luck with some of these middle seats? We could trade with anyone we’re potentially stealing from.” 

“No, I should be okay with the stairs. My hip isn’t too bad today,” Viktor says before he starts climbing. Their seats aren’t directly in the centre of the back row but a little to the right. When they sit, Viktor comments, “Good seats. I like sitting in the back.” 

“Me too. Best view, a little more private too.”

“Yeah, you know how I like to talk during movies. I try to be as quiet as possible—in public, at least.”

“I do love your commentary,” Jayce says, noticing a couple sitting down a few chairs away. Deciding to keep his voice down, Jayce whispers in Viktor’s ear, “By the way, you can hold onto me if you get scared.”

“You just want me to cuddle you,” Viktor whispers back with a roll of his eyes as another commercial plays that neither of them are paying attention to.

Flipping up the arm rest between them, Jayce grins. “Guilty.”

“You can just say that, then,” Viktor huffs, easily wrapping his arms around Jayce’s bicep and resting his head on his shoulder. “There, happy?”

“Very,” Jayce replies, instinctively kissing the crown of Viktor’s head.

A minute later, after sitting through another commercial, Viktor whispers in his ear, “I’m bored, when is the movie starting?” 

“I dunno. The trailers haven’t even started, V,” Jayce whispers back, leaning into his breathing space.

“I don’t remember the last movie trailer I’ve seen… oh, maybe Us. My sister got me to watch it.”

“Love that movie. Whatcha think of it?”

“I liked it. Really interesting concept and good execution, I thought,” Viktor replies before chewing on his lip in consideration. “Want to make out?” 

Jayce blinks. “Right now?”

“Until the movie starts.”

“Like teenagers?” He grins teasingly, his lips mere inches from Viktor’s. 

“I never did it. I’ve only seen it in movies and TV shows,” Viktor shrugs. “But yes, in theory, like teenagers.”

“Absolutely,” Jayce murmurs, then cradles Viktor’s cheek and closes the distance between them. Viktor’s lips are usually soft, tonight being no different, and it feels like returning home. Kissing Viktor has felt like home for months now. 

Viktor sighs against his lips, his left hand moving up to cup the side of Jayce’s neck tenderly while his right arm remains wrapped around his bicep. Just kissing for the sake of kissing reminds Jayce of the night they met. He was in denial at the time, but immediately he had a feeling—like an alien substance flooding his veins and crystallizing in his chest. It was unfamiliar, nameless, and fuelled by Viktor’s lips alone when they kissed in his bed that night.

Jayce can now name it as a crush. He, admittedly, has had a crush on Viktor since the night they met, and he hasn’t had one in well over a decade which is why it felt so unfamiliar. He just has a natural magnetism Jayce can’t help but be drawn to, like he’s an astral body being hooked into Viktor’s gravitational pull. And every new detail he learns about Viktor only feeds the infatuation. He can’t name a single thing he doesn’t like about the man, but he’s also wary of the fact that Viktor wears a mask—a mask that’s been cracking slowly over time with each new act of intimacy. 

Ever since Viktor called him to be a distraction from the grief of losing his mother, another anniversary passing—which Jayce knows what that’s like—he’s started to feel like they’re on the precipice of something more. Who cries in their fuck buddy’s arms, seeking comfort and care, and expects it to remain casual? Jayce only established they were companions to at least put some label on their relationship, one that wouldn’t freak Viktor out… right now, anyway. I know, if we keep going like this, it’s going to become something more, Jayce thinks as he kisses Viktor slowly and sensually. Something that Viktor isn’t going to be open to, at least not right away. 

I can be patient. I think he’s worth taking time and going at his pace.

By the time the trailers are over, Jayce’s lips feel bruised from how hard Viktor had been kissing him. When he looks at his companion, his hair is mussed from Jayce’s hand incessantly combing through it and playing with it, while his lips are red and kiss-bitten. Honey eyes look at him in a daze, glassy and reflecting the large projected screen in the dark theatre, then Viktor whispers, “I’m sad the trailers are over.”

The movie is, in fact, starting and Jayce feels the same way. Murmuring in return, Jayce says, “If you get bored we can go for another round.” Viktor snorts quietly, leaning his head on Jayce’s shoulder again.

They barely move from their original position during the movie. The grip on his left arm tightens during the tense moments, and Jayce casually places his hand on Viktor’s thigh as a comfort. Jayce feels voyeuristic as he listens to the quiet gasps that leave Viktor when he jumps, relishing in the vulnerability Viktor seems to have progressively been showing him more of in the last month. Their goodbye kisses have even become less heated and more… frankly, romantic. 

The commentary remains to a minimum because the movie is so quiet that even a whisper can be heard in the theatre. Viktor also seems too on edge for his usual witty commentary anyway, with the exception of a small ‘co to kurva?’ under his breath during the flashback scene, which Jayce will ask about later. They also made a mistake and didn’t pace themselves in terms of snacks, so everything but their large sodas are gone when they’re less than an hour in. By the climax of the movie, Viktor is sitting with his legs folded under him, his head resting against Jayce’s chest while he has his arm wrapped around Viktor’s shoulders. 

Cait can eat her words. This is absolutely a date, he can’t help but think while they shamelessly cuddle in the darkness.

When the sconces come back on, they both blink a few times for their eyes to adjust to the light. Viktor stretches with a yawn, his shirt hiking up just enough to show a sliver of skin, making Jayce’s brain go in two different directions: his yawns are cute and god I love his body, I’d worship him right here if it wasn’t illegal.

“So, what did you think?” Jayce asks, managing to tame his desire as he gathers up their garbage and Viktor grabs his crutch. 

“Honestly, I didn’t like it as much as the first. Plus, I thought the flashback kind of made the first movie weaker,” Viktor replies, walking ahead of Jayce and finishing his Dr. Pepper as he does. 

“Oh yeah, during that you muttered something… So toe corva?” Jayce cringes, following Viktor to the exit, fully aware he’s butchering the pronunciation.

Viktor laughs—a full-bellied, wholehearted laugh—shaking his head. “No, co to kurva. It means ‘what the fuck’. I said that because I thought the flashback was kind of stupid.” 

“I agree—I think the flashback also changed the lore, because I thought the creatures first landed in Mexico or something? Now they just… landed everywhere?” Jayce tosses their garbage in the trashcan, Viktor disposing of his drink at the same time, before they exit the theatre. 

“I hate when movies do that. It feels like they didn’t actually think about how the family got to be in their situation in the first movie. I mean… the movie wasn’t terrible, but I feel it was kind of an unnecessary cash grab. Maybe that’s me being a cynic though.”

“No, I think you have a point. I do think the movie didn’t need to exist. I enjoyed it but it did feel, like, cheap compared to the first one. You know what I mean? And it did make the first movie weaker by adding maybe too much lore.”

“You’re absolutely right. I think there was too much of the monsters and the flashback didn’t need to be there,” Viktor continues as they leave the building and start walking back to Jayce’s car. “That fucking baby stressed me the fuck out, though.”

“God, me too. I knew, rationally, the kids wouldn’t die, but it was still tense. What did you think of the addition of Cillian Murphy’s character?”

“He looks hot with a beard,” Viktor snorts.

“Y’know, I suspected you might’ve been into him,” Jayce grins as he unlocks his car and gets in the driver’s seat.

“What can I say, I like older men and beards,” Viktor shrugs, sitting in the passenger seat with his crutch next to his legs again. “To actually answer your question… I don’t know. I think it would have been more interesting if the family didn’t have a gun-toting man around to save their asses. I don’t think the movie, as is, could have worked without him, I just think they could have gone in a less action-heavy direction.” 

“Agreed. I don’t think you’re being cynical at all, by the way—nothing wrong with having solid opinions.”

“Can I be annoying and request one more stop before we head back to your place?” Viktor asks as he buckles his seatbelt. 

Jayce turns to Viktor and shakes his head. “You wouldn’t be annoying, Vik. Where you wanna go?” 

“McDonald’s?” Viktor smiles coyly, as if he just said something suggestive.

Chuckling, Jayce starts the car and fondly says, “You love your junk food. What’re you craving?”

“A hot fudge sundae—extra fudge.”

“Hell yeah. I’m gettin’ an Oreo McFlurry then.”

They continue to run through their thoughts on the movie as they make the five minute drive to the nearest McDonald’s. Jayce, of course, pays like the gentleman he is. I want Viktor to feel like a spoiled prince, it’s what he deserves, is all he thinks before he parks his car in the back of the parking lot so they can eat their ice cream before it melts.

“What’s your favourite movie?” Jayce asks as he starts to dig into his McFlurry, watching Viktor take his first bite too. The way his lips wrap around his spoon is obscene, distracting him.

Viktor looks over at him, seemingly unaware of how the simple act made Jayce’s dick twitch involuntarily. “God, my favourite movie? That’s such a loaded question.”

Focusing back on Viktor’s words, he replies, “What, you don’t have one?”

“Absolutely not. I think I have one per genre.”

“Okay, what’s your favourite sci-fi movie then? Since I know you love it.” 

Viktor hums in thought as he licks the vanilla ice cream from his spoon. It’s practically pornographic, and Jayce is doing everything in his power not to fixate on his lips, or his tongue that’s making the occasional appearance. “Okay, this is harder than I thought it would be… Can I divide them into subcategories?”

“You could make me a spreadsheet, either way I’ll take it.”

“Okay. Classics? E.T. Animated: The Iron Giant. And ones in the last five years, because I can’t choose, Arrival and The Martian.”

“I knew you had good taste,” Jayce chuckles between bites.

“What about you?”

“I have a definitive favourite—Aliens.”

“That one is pretty good. Any reason why you prefer it over the original?”

“I thought Ripley was significantly more badass in Aliens. The fight with the Queen in the exosuit is legendary. Plus the addition of the maternal dynamic with Newt added a more human element to the story.”

“Good answer,” Viktor smiles cheekily around another spoonful of ice cream. “Comedy?”

“Oh man… I really like Anchorman and Zoolander, but if I really had to choose one, Hot Fuzz.”

“I don’t think I’ve seen… any of those,” Viktor admits with slight embarrassment. “Why Hot Fuzz though, what’s it about?”

“It’s a British film—written by Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg—about a city cop who is transferred to a boring small town, where he meets Nick Frost’s character who has never encountered any dangerous police work. Simon Pegg is kind of a miserable bastard and Nick Frost gets him to come out of his shell and have a bit of fun. It’s a buddy cop movie, but there’s a murder mystery plot twist.”

“It’s a comedy with a murder mystery plot twist?” Viktor asks, pausing for a moment. “No, wait, that sounds fun because I really like Clue.”

“What’s yours?”

“Mrs. Doubtfire. I love Robin Williams.” 

“Yes, classic. Good choice,” Jayce nods approvingly, already halfway through his ice cream. “Hey, do you like musicals?”

“I’m picky about them. I don’t fuck with broadway but I appreciate things like the musical episode of Buffy.”

“Do you have a favourite musical movie?”

“In my opinion, there can only be one—Rocky Horror.”

“Fuck yes, agreed. We should watch Rocky Horror this Halloween. I’ll bring my corset and heels.”

“You would make a hot Frank-N-Furter, don’t joke,” Viktor snorts, finishing his fudge sundae already and licking his spoon clean.

Jayce’s brain short circuits at the sight, swallowing thickly when a drop of melted soft serve drips past Viktor’s bottom lip without him noticing. “You, uh… you got a little…”

Viktor puts his empty ice cream cup down and blinks at Jayce. “What?”

Reaching over, Jayce swipes the drop of milky liquid from below Viktor’s bottom lip before licking his own thumb, savouring the sweet spectre from his skin.

Glancing downward, Viktor smirks before looking back at Jayce. “Have you been having dirty thoughts?”

A flush reaches Jayce’s ears at the question. “What? N-No…”

“You have a semi.”

Looking down at his lap, Jayce can see that… yes, he’s half-hard, straining against his jeans. Looking back at Viktor with mild embarrassment. “Uh…”

“What got you? My impeccable taste in cinema?” Viktor grins, his hand skirting over Jayce’s thigh, fingertips creeping along the inseam of his pants.

“No, just the… pornographic way you were eating your ice cream,” he admits, licking his lips. His eyes follow Viktor’s hand, his dick reacting as expected and getting harder by the second. Laughing awkwardly, Jayce says, “Okay, maybe it’s time to get back to my place.”

“Not necessarily,” Viktor purrs, before looking out his window and in the rearview mirror. They’re parked in the corner of the lot, near the dumpsters and facing a park dense with trees, and Jayce follows Viktor’s gaze. 

Then it hits him, his eyes bulging in disbelief. “You’re not actually considering— here?” 

Viktor grins, both hands reaching over to Jayce’s belt, deftly unbuckling it in seconds. “No one’s here—for now—so I better be quick,” he whispers with a dangerous edge, continuing to unzip Jayce’s jeans.

“W-What happened to you teasing me for proposing public sex?” Jayce stutters, setting his ice cream down in the cup holder to avoid dropping it. His heart pounds in his chest and his palms begin to sweat, adrenaline flooding every nook and cranny of his mortal flesh.

“That was beaches and pools. I’m not above blowing you in your car,” Viktor replies with another mischievous smile.

Jayce gasps when Viktor’s fingers dip below the waistband of his boxer briefs, swallowing thickly when Viktor pulls his cock out and begins to stroke him to full hardness. “If we get arrested… it’ll be so worth it,” he laughs uncomfortably. He’s only as nervous as he is because public sex has been a long-standing fantasy, one he never thought he’d be brave enough to act on.

Turns out Viktor is brave and bold enough for the both of them to commit the crime. Jayce gets hard fast from the fear and excitement that’s making his brain short-circuit like his freshman robotics midterm project. Without hesitation, Viktor ducks his head to place open-mouthed kisses, wet and hot, to the underside. 

It only just occurs to Jayce in that moment that this is the first time Viktor is giving him a blowjob without a condom. Since they ditched them a month ago, they just coincidentally haven’t done it yet. Why is the first unprotected blowjob I get from him in the fucking 13th Street McDonald’s parking lot?

When Viktor’s mouth reaches the tip, he looks up at Jayce and licks it with the flat of his tongue. His golden eyes glint in the moonlight streaming into the car, intense with desire, and he holds his gaze while twirling his tongue around the tip. Jayce makes the decision that he’s going to let Viktor control this—I know by now he likes being in control—and he will merely be a passenger. However, he won’t resist touching, so his right hand tangles in Viktor’s dark hair, neither pushing nor pulling.

Viktor sighs when he takes the head of Jayce’s cock in his mouth. His tongue flicks at Jayce’s foreskin before sucking gently, making Jayce gasp again then let out a shuddering breath. “Madre de Dios… Por favor Dios, que nadie nos atrape.” Jayce’s voice trembles, the prayer to God being his first in years, something he thought he left behind in his Catholic upbringing. But, no, if he’s committing a sex crime, he’ll quickly start praying for a miracle.

Pulling off, Viktor looks up at him with amusement, snorting. “Are you praying?”

“Yes, that we don’t get caught, so let’s… uh… not take our time,” Jayce says with an embarrassed flush on his face. What he actually wants to say is, ‘For the love of God, Viktor, please blow me faster before a cop shows up.’ He knows this is Caitlyn’s beat after all. The scenario practically writes itself in his head, and it’s nothing short of mortifying.

“Blow you faster, you mean?” Viktor grins before slowly dragging his tongue over the head, earning a shudder from Jayce.

“M-Mierda, yes, that’s what I mean—” His words are cut off by Viktor’s thumb gently brushing over the sensitive vein, sending a lightning strike straight to his already-scrambled brain. His companion grins up at him, satisfied that he has such an effect on him, and the sight alone triggers precum to dribble from the tip of his cock. “Eres el diablo.”

“Did you just call me the devil?” Viktor asks humorously before doing it again. The hot, textured muscle laps up the bead of precum and Viktor obscenely licks his lips while still looking up at him through his pretty lashes. 

“Yes, you might just be him,” Jayce says as he releases an anxious chuckle. Rather than reply, Viktor seems to focus on his goal and swallows him down, sinking on his length. Jayce lets out a stuttering breath, tightening his grip on Viktor’s hair, tempted to throw his head back in pleasure but too enraptured with the sight below him. It’s impressive how deep Viktor can’t take his cock, not stopping until his nose is buried in his pubic hair and his breathing has halted. He chokes and pulls back just enough to recover for a few moments before swallowing him down again. 

“Holy fuck, baby,” Jayce groans, gripping tightly to Viktor’s hair. Baby. I love calling him that. I think he likes it too. One day, he will be mine, he thinks in the haze of pleasure. Maybe that’s delusional of him, but Viktor’s mouth wrapped around his cock distracts him from any rational thought. “You’re so good with your mouth…”

Viktor responds with a hum of approval, the vibration like a gunshot to his senses. He knows he’s leaking in Viktor’s mouth from how aroused he is, resisting the urge to buck his hips and take control. His tongue feels like sensual velvet as he caresses the sensitive skin, bobbing his head faster and faster. The sight of saliva dribbling from the corner of his mouth down to his chin provokes Jayce to fist Viktor’s chocolate tresses. The veins in his arm are like iron, taut against his skin, and he’s fearful he might tear a muscle from the pressure. 

At this point, Jayce has gone nonverbal. The primitive sounds coming out of his mouth are just a chaotic mash-up of groans, grunts, growls and moans. He even whined and whimpered somewhere in there too. And the entire time, Viktor looks absolutely ethereal with his lips wrapped around Jayce’s cock and tears trickling down his flushed cheeks. There’s a hungry glint in his eye, one that makes him feel like prey being stalked from the shadows of his dashboard.

Slowly, Viktor pulls his head back, hollowing his cheeks and just barely scraping his teeth against his sensitive length. A shuddering gasp is punched out of him and he pulls on Viktor’s hair gently but urgently. “V-V, I’m—” Rather than let him continue to speak, Viktor swallows down his cock and twists his hand around the base while stroking whatever can’t fit in his mouth comfortably. Jayce couldn’t even speak if he tried again. His hips twitch beneath Viktor’s grip, who holds him down as best he can. However, Jayce has at least eighty pounds of muscle on him, so Viktor can’t stop him from jerking his pelvis enough to hit the back of his throat and make him choke.

There is a collision of stars behind Jayce’s eyelids when he comes. He doesn’t recognize his voice, only Viktor’s name, as he cries from what was definitely the best blowjob of his life. Viktor continues to clean him up with his tongue until he’s shuddering with sensitivity. When Jayce finally opens his eyes again, panting from the intense pleasure that was torn from him, he watches while Viktor licks his lips clean and sits up. 

“How was that?” Viktor asks, biting back a grin as he brings his lips close to Jayce’s. “Everything you imagined?”

“Better,” Jayce replies before cupping the nape of Viktor’s neck and drawing him in for a fierce kiss. Viktor leans over the centre console while stroking Jayce’s beard, and the small sigh that falls from his lips while they kiss urges Jayce to go further. His left hand glides over Viktor’s stomach, lower and lower, until Jayce palms his groin. 

Sharply taking in a breath, Viktor deepens the kiss, grinding into Jayce’s hand. Heat emanates between Viktor’s thighs, and Jayce can imagine how wet he is already. He wants to discover the reality though. His hand travels back up to the front of Viktor’s pants while he licks into Jayce’s mouth eagerly. 

He unbuttons Viktor’s pants.

A car pulls up beside them with only one parking space between them.

Immediately they part, sitting up straight in their seats as if their touch would burn one another. Jayce’s heart nearly leaps in his throat as he sees the blue car with the gold Piltover Police Department insignia on the side. “Of fuck—they didn’t see us, right? Or did someone report us?”

“Aren’t your windows tinted? Plus it’s dark,” Viktor rationalizes, but clearly on edge from the way he’s gripping his own thigh.

Jayce instinctively places a comforting hand on top of Viktor’s, not even thinking of it, and his companion relaxes under his touch. They both wait, watching for the occupant(s?) to come out and potentially arrest them for public indecency. Neither of them breathe. 

The door swings open and a middle aged man who is the very picture of a suburban dad steps out. He doesn’t even look their way and instead heads across the parking lot to the McDonald’s. 

They both sigh in relief at the same time before breaking out into laughter. “Holy fuck, I thought I was about to get arrested. Again.”

Viktor is laughing so hard he can hardly breathe, though it dies down just enough for him to ask, “Again?”

“Underage drinking. I was never charged, just got off with a warning,” he chuckles. The memory is painful because it was one of the many catalysts that led to his suicide attempt, but he doesn’t let it show. “I feel like my body is vibrating with how much adrenaline my brain just released. Between the public blowjob and a cop showing up.”

“Yeah, me too. I’m disappointed he interrupted you fucking me with your fingers, though,” Viktor groans, throwing his head back. “Please take me back to your place and fuck me already.” 

“As you wish,” Jayce grins as he starts up his car. Viktor rolls his eyes, but there’s an obvious fondness behind it.

Viktor looks antsy when they enter his condo building, like he’s a lion ready to pounce on an unsuspecting gazelle—Jayce being the gazelle in this situation. The blowjob clearly got him worked up because he’s shifting from one foot to his crutch while they wait for the elevator. There’s no one else around other than the two guards at the concierge desk, given that it’s midnight on a Friday so people are either already at home or still out on the town.

They step into the elevator and he presses the sixteenth floor. As soon as the doors close, Viktor grabs the collar of his button up and yanks him down, meeting him with a bruising kiss. It knocks the wind out of his lungs, prompting him to gasp into Viktor’s mouth when the other man invades his own with his tongue. God, I love when he gets aggressive and controlling. It’s so fucking hot, Jayce thinks in a fog, participating but letting Viktor guide the flurry of tongues and teeth. He almost misses when the elevator dings and it opens to Jayce’s hallway. 

“Hurry up,” Viktor demands, stepping out of the elevator and beelining for Jayce’s apartment. He catches up, stepping ahead of Viktor so he can reach the door first to unlock it. When Jayce opens his door, Viktor is immediately on him. His crutch clatters against the faux wood flooring as he throws his arms around Jayce’s neck and kisses him again. 

Jayce returns the kiss, drops his keys on the table in the entryway and kicks the door closed, blindly locking it. Squeezing Viktor’s waist, his fingertips brush together prompting a flare of arousal to stir within him. His cock twitches when Viktor’s hand cards through his hair, only to grip it and pull, yanking his head back to stare at him with a fiery gaze. “Bend me over your kitchen table and fuck me like I’m nothing but a sex object.” 

It’s a command, not a request, and Jayce loves that Viktor is bold enough to give him orders. A shiver climbs up his spine, vibrating through every vertebrae, as he nods. He’s more than willing to fuck Viktor rough, dirty and disrespectfully. “Happily,” he growls in response, his jeans tented with his quickly growing erection, before Viktor releases his hair. Not wanting Viktor to have to walk all the way to the dining table, even though it’s at most twenty feet away, he scoops the other man up swiftly, carrying him bridal style.

Viktor yelps, tightening his hold around Jayce’s neck as he glares at him. “What happened to warning me?”

“Sorry, baby, I just got excited,” Jayce grins before kissing the wrinkle in Viktor’s brow away while carrying him to the table. Setting him down, he spins Viktor toward the table, giving him a nice view of the city, and forces him to bend over. Viktor makes a noise somewhere between a grunt and a moan when Jayce presses his face into the cheap wooden IKEA table (he didn’t bother with anything fancy). 

With one hand holding down his head, the other snakes around Viktor’s middle to unbutton his capris. Within moments, they’re undone and Jayce is shoving his pants and underwear down to his knees, nudging Viktor’s feet apart as far as they can go. He doesn’t waste any time, pushing two fingers between Viktor’s folds and God, he’s so wet. Feeling the moisture dripping from Viktor’s pussy, paired with the gasp that transforms into a moan that slips past his lips, is the last thing Jayce needs to get fully hard. 

“Just fuck me, don’t bother with fingering me,” Viktor demands again, and Jayce isn’t one to complain. Pulling his fingers away after he teases his entrance ever so slightly, he cleans his digits of Viktor’s sweetness, groaning from the taste. Fuck, he tastes so good. With mild annoyance, but mostly impatience, Viktor growls his name. “Jayce, you can taste my pussy later.”

“Fuck, yeah, okay,” Jayce replies in a rush before undoing his jeans and pulling out his cock, one handed, in record time. He doesn’t wait, or warn, he just begins to push his cock inside Viktor slowly but not too slowly. Viktor isn’t the only one that’s impatient.

“Sakra, jsi tak velký, Jayce,” Viktor moans, tilting his hips back and making Jayce’s flesh disappear further inside his cunt. 

Pretty sure I’ve heard that one before, he mentally notes despite the groan rolling off his vocal chords. Holding Viktor’s waist with one hand and keeping the other fisted in his hair, Jayce steadily buries himself inside him. Viktor’s tight heat welcomes him, leaking and stretching around him in a way that makes his head spin. His mind wanders to earlier when he had called Viktor the devil and he thinks, that doesn’t feel true now because he has the pussy of an angel.

He’s barely fully sheathed inside Viktor before he growls, “Move.” Jayce shudders at the commanding tone Viktor has taken, wanting nothing more than to obey. Dragging his hips back, not too fast but not so slow that he irritates Viktor, he bites his bottom lip to keep himself from moaning unabashedly. While I don’t want to hurt him, he’s always so much tighter when I don’t prep him. It fucking drives me crazy. 

“I’m not going to break, proboha,” Viktor hisses, slamming his hips back to take his entire length in one sharp movement. For the second time that night, Viktor knocks the wind out of him, not having expected the sudden movement. A choked noise, something between a moan and a gasp, leaves Viktor’s pretty lips, and Jayce finally gets the message.

Jayce doesn’t hold back. He snaps his hips back and forth with enough force to rock the table forward a couple of inches. A scraping sound can be heard beneath Viktor’s whimpers and Jayce realizes it’s his nails scratching against the table top, desperate to squeeze something. He holds the other edge of the table then, needing it to ground as he’s fucked into oblivion. A slew of curses, with Jayce’s name sprinkled throughout, tumble from Viktor’s mouth and it’s the most enchanting sound to him.

“You feel so good, baby,” Jayce praises, stroking Viktor’s hair without even stuttering his hips. The euphoria from Viktor’s hole swallowing him greedily makes him bolder, uttering the words, “Tell me you’re mine.”

“I’m—I’m yours,” Viktor replies, panting hard enough that the black tabletop fogs with condensation. 

Those two words make Jayce’s brain buzz with excitement, triggering him to piston his hips harder. The smacking sounds of their bodies crashing together echo off the glass wall, but it can barely be heard over Viktor’s high-pitched whines and groans of bliss. His grip on Viktor’s waist tightens, likely hard enough to bruise, and he can’t resist the urge to lean down and whisper in Viktor’s ear, “Say it again. Say you were made to take my cock and nothing else.”

A whimper is Viktor’s first response as he makes small pitiful sounds with each thrust, his velvety walls clenching around Jayce’s cock, and it takes him a few moments to find his voice again. “I… I was made… to take your cock,” he returns between shuddering breaths. A moan strangles him, dying in his throat, when Jayce slams his hips into him, worked up by the possessive dirty talk. When Viktor speaks again, he sounds wrecked and on the verge of tears. “Ó můj z-zatracený bože—d-do that again.”

Jayce doesn’t need to be told twice. He does it again, and again, and each time Viktor lets out a new sound—primal wails, sweet mewls, and frantic sobs bitten back with little success. His cunt tightens around Jayce’s cock with each thrust and he can recognize the signs that Viktor’s close, knowing he’s hitting his cervix just the way he likes. Viktor continues to weep and Jayce looms above him, watching the tears roll down the bridge of his nose and onto the tabletop. 

His own orgasm is quickly approaching as he thrusts faster, bending down to bite the back of Viktor’s neck. As he paints his nape purple, he earns a gasp out of his companion and nothing else. If Jayce had to guess, Viktor has gone nonverbal, reduced to pathetic cries and moans. Suddenly, just as Jayce finishes scraping his teeth over the new mark, Viktor quakes and lets out one more earth-shattering cry as he comes. His body goes limp and Jayce holds him up by his hips, chasing his own orgasm with a quickness. Viktor continues to whine tearfully, nails clawing against the laminated surface, until Jayce’s hips stutter. He buries his face between Viktor’s shoulder blades as he comes inside him, digging his fingertips into the soft meat of his hips. 

“Fuck,” Viktor pants after about a minute of silence, outside of their ragged breaths. “You do deliver.” 

“I do my best,” Jayce huffs out a laugh before kissing the nape of Viktor’s neck where he marked him, pulling out slowly. Viktor shivers beneath him as he does, a trembling breath falling from his mouth. “Sensitive?”

“Yeah… You fucked me so good my entire body is soup,” he laughs softly. 

“How ‘bout a bath?” 

“Mm… sounds wonderful,” Viktor replies, his voice hoarse from his weeping. Finally putting weight on his good leg again and propping himself up on his elbows, he looks over his shoulder at Jayce and continues. “I just realized I was so horny I completely forgot my bag in your car.”

Grinning before kissing Viktor’s cheek he says, “I’ll get you set up in the tub then go grab it.”

“You’re sweet.” Shakily, Viktor lifts himself further, planting one hand on the table while the other reaches up to draw Jayce in for a kiss over his shoulder. Jayce’s heart flutters as he melts into the kiss, his mind polluted with the afterglow of a good orgasm while a torrent of butterflies assault his oesophagus. 

I might be falling for him, he thinks as their lips dance to a tender rhythm. One of his arms snake around Viktor’s torso, slipping beneath his shirt to glide over the fragile skin of his stomach. The hand cradling his cheek slips down until Viktor is holding his chin while they continue to kiss, and Jayce feels like he could swoon.  

Fuck, I’m in trouble. He’s got me in the palm of his hand. I don’t know what I wouldn’t do for him.

Maybe murder.

Maybe.

When Viktor breaks the kiss, though he seems to do so reluctantly given that he leans in for one more peck, he looks at Jayce expectantly. “You’re planning on carrying me, right?”

Jayce chuckles, taking a step back to pick Viktor up bridal style. “Of course I am. Who do you take me for?”

Viktor is a mess, pants still dragged down to his knees and hair mussed from Jayce pressing him into the table. He huffs, pushing his hair out of his face before hooking both arms around Jayce’s neck. “A gentleman, as always.” 

Twenty minutes later, Jayce is returning from the parking garage with Viktor’s bag, setting it down on his bed. Viktor peers at him from the bathtub, through the open bathroom door, and he distinctly has a come hither look in his eyes. 

“Join me?” He asks, folding his arms on the side of the tub. “There’s enough room for both of us.”

“Yeah? Thought, based on the fact that you wanted me to sleep in your tub if we lived together, you didn’t like sharing,” Jayce teases, though he approaches the bathroom while unbuttoning his shirt.

Viktor huffs fondly, shaking his head with a playful smirk. “Just this once.”

“Oh, how generous of you.” It takes Jayce mere moments to get fully undressed. Scooting forward a little, Viktor makes space behind him for Jayce to sit, and he gladly takes his seat. Once settled, Viktor leans back until he’s wrapped up in Jayce’s arms, letting out a pleased sigh. Jayce hooks his chin over Viktor’s shoulder and whispers, “Comfy?”

Humming in approval, Viktor shuts his eyes and tilts his head until it’s touching Jayce’s. The point of contact serves no purpose other than to be close, and it makes Jayce’s stomach tie itself into a sailor’s knot. It’s getting difficult to ignore how intimate they are, more intimate than any fuck buddies or ‘companions’ should be. It’s no longer a functional, practical relationship—was it ever? There’s feelings between them that scare him, and Viktor seems to be in denial of it in favour of ignorant bliss. As Jayce presses a kiss to Viktor’s shoulder, he thinks, this is either going to end in my favour… or end devastatingly.

Suddenly, Viktor is turning his head and cradling Jayce’s jaw, looking into his eyes through his lashes. Jayce takes the hint and leans in to capture his lips, kissing him slowly and delicately. Their noses brush together while droplets of water cling to Jayce’s beard from Viktor’s hand, and he can feel Viktor let out a shuddering breath into his own mouth. Recognizing an opportunity, Jayce dips his tongue into his entrance, relishing in the soft whine Viktor rewards him with.

They spend what feels like ages making out, all while Jayce holds Viktor firmly in his arms. Tender touches are exchanged until the water grows lukewarm, finally prompting Viktor to lift his opposite hand that had been holding onto Jayce’s knee beneath the water. “I’m pruning, it might be time to get out,” he says quietly as he wiggles his wrinkling appendages, a soft grin and a flush on his handsome face.

“Bed then?” 

“Mhm.”

It takes them a few minutes to dry off, which Jayce does most of the work for both of them—not out of obligation, but because he loves spoiling Viktor. Love. I love doing things for him. I wonder how long it will be until I just plainly love him—it doesn’t feel like an if anymore, it feels like a when.

“I’m cashing in, by the way,” Viktor murmurs once they’re finally cuddling in bed, still seemingly blissed out from the bath and feral fucking they did over the table. 

“Cashing in what?” Jayce asks, looking at Viktor with pinched brows. 

“My oral I.O.U.”

Right. Pancake competition. He earned it fair and square. “Right now?”

“No. I want you to wake me up by eating me out,” Viktor grins. “And then… I want fresh baked pastries.”

“Something tells me I might have spoiled you a little bit,” he grins teasingly.

“Maybe. Maybe not. I might have always been this high-maintenance, just didn’t have a long or deep enough relationship to see it. You’ve already outlived my last fuck buddy.”

“Yeah? How long did that last?”

“Four months. I ended things with him when he started acting weird after Christmas. He gave me a necklace as a gift like I was his boyfriend or something. I gave it back and told him it was over, then he begged for me to stay and give him a chance. It was kind of pathetic.”

Note to self: Don’t beg on your hands and knees for Viktor to give you a chance. If you do, maybe at least wait until the eight-month mark. Knowing him though, he might not be ready for a year. I hope not.

“Damn, you got a man to fall in love with you in four months?” Jayce laughs awkwardly, but Viktor doesn’t seem to pick up on his slight discomfort.

“I think he loved the idea of me, not the real me. I didn’t get real with him, ever… not like I’ve gotten real with you,” Viktor replies quietly, fingers brushing over Jayce’s chest hair lazily. 

I could love the real you if you gave me a chance, is what Jayce wants to say. I’m not in love with him, not yet, but I know I could. “I’m glad you can be real with me.”

“You’re easy to talk to, I admit,” Viktor says with a sigh, wrapping his arm around Jayce’s middle. “Thanks for taking me out tonight. I had a lot of fun.”

“Me too… we should do it again sometime. As much as I like hanging around, eating takeout and watching movies, it was nice to go out for a change.” 

“I agree.” Viktor pauses. “Oh, also, thanks for fucking me. You did a great job.”

Jayce laughs, rubbing Viktor’s shoulder affectionately. “Thanks. I know what makes you tick by now.”

“Mm, I don’t know. There’s still many unexplored sexual frontiers.” 

“What’s the final frontier?” 

“We don’t talk about the final frontier.”

“It’s poop stuff, isn’t it?”

“I said we don’t talk about it,” Viktor says very seriously though he’s barely concealing a giggle.

“Yeah, I prefer safer frontiers.”

Suddenly, his bed partner looks up at him with disbelief. “Wait… we’ve been fucking for six months and we haven’t thought to have the kink talk?”

Blinking at Viktor, Jayce thinks back on it. “Huh. I don’t think so. The closest we came was when you asked me about spanking.”’

“Okay, well, we should talk about it. Maybe we could do one of those sex menu things.”

Grabbing his phone from the nightstand, Jayce quickly searches for a decent list to fill out. “Okay, I got one,” Jayce says a minute later, and Viktor gets even closer to look at his phone screen. “First one is anal. Giving, receiving, or both.”

“I’m open. I like receiving, it’s just not my first choice. A lot of work, in my opinion.”

“I’ve received a few times, given mostly. Also not my first choice but I still like it.” 

Viktor raises a brow at Jayce. “Huh. I thought you’d be strictly a top. Guess I don’t know you well enough.” 

“Usually. My ex pegged me a few times and I was into it, but I haven’t really since.”

“You know, I’ve never topped. In my life.”

“Really? You’re so dominant sometimes I just assumed you must have plowed some man twice your size at some point.”

“Nope. I might consider it sometime, though.” 

“Good to know,” Jayce nods, making a note in his phone before looking back at the list. “Ass eating?”

“Not really my thing. Giving or receiving.”

“Same. I’ll just cross it off our list… bondage?”

“Yes. Both ways.”

“Heeeeeell yeah. Pretty sure I can comfortably fasten some cuffs to this headboard.” 

They spend close to an hour going through the whole list. It turns out, they’re more compatible than they initially thought, which only supports Jayce’s growing theory that they might just be soulmates. Scientific evaluation is still in progress. “What’s your biggest fantasy? You said you’re open to roleplay, so… what would that look like?”

A flush appears on Viktor’s cheeks, adorable as always, while he murmurs, “Promise you won’t make fun of me?”

“Absolutely not.”

“I can’t choose between them so… either co-workers or, um… student-teacher.”

“You haven’t been having naughty thoughts at work, have you?” Jayce grins.

“No, I take that home with me,” Viktor huffs. “You said you wouldn’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not, I’m just teasing—I’m into both, too. Office sex is way up there, and I like the idea of sexy academia. As you already know, public sex has been a long-standing fantasy. Which, thank you for crossing that off my bucket list, by the way.”

“Maybe there’s more where that came from,” the other man smiles cheekily, propping himself up while resting on Jayce’s chest. “What’s the sexiest part of my body? To you, I mean. I’ve always been curious.”

Jayce groans, throwing his head back. “Do I really have to choose?”

“Yes. If you could only see one part of me ever again, what would it be?”

“Is this some weird wizard curse?”

“Yes, a wizard has casted Bestow Curse on you. Now answer.”

“Then… your eyes.”

Scoffing, Viktor rolls said eyes. “Be serious. I’m not going to think you’re a dog for saying my pussy or ass.”

Jayce shakes his head, looking at Viktor earnestly. “I mean it. They’re so expressive and beautiful—I came over to tell you your eyes were enchanting, remember?” A soft grin at the memory of when they first met arises, and he’s so fucking glad he decided to approach Viktor that night.

“You came over because you wanted to put your dick in me,” Viktor smirks, an underlying fondness visible within the culprits in question.

“Also true, but your eyes blew me away more than your pussy,” he ribs him again, nodding to Viktor. “What about you? What’s your favourite part of my body?”

“Your dick, obviously.” The smirk turns into a wicked grin before it softens. “I’m kidding… I think eyes are a good choice. I did tell you I think hazel eyes are very pretty, which was true, not just a flirt. And, that way we can eye-fuck each other for the rest of our disembodied lives.” 

The answer more than satisfies him, and it makes him hopeful that Viktor is just as enamoured with him as he is with him. “That sounds like a marriage proposal,” he dares to say, his lips stretched into a grin. “I accept.” 

“Shut up, you’re such a dork,” Viktor playfully smacks Jayce’s pec, prompting shared laughter, before he rolls off of him. Glancing at his phone in Jayce’s periphery, Viktor yawns. “Fuck, how is it almost four? We’ve been talking for like two hours.”

The time passes so easily with you, Jayce thinks as he rolls onto his side and impulsively plays with Viktor’s hair. “I’m just that entertaining.”

“Yeah, well if you’re going to eat me out and get me pastries in like five hours, you’re going to have to stop entertaining me and in favour of sleep,” Viktor snorts, mirroring Jayce by facing him. “You really like my hair, huh?” 

“I think it’s cute and it suits you. Plus it’s fun to play with,” Jayce replies as he twirls one of the locks around his index finger. 

“I was half tempted to cut it, but I do like that you like it so much.”

“Makes you look like a prince out of a fairytale, in my opinion.” The smile Jayce gives him is soft, not at all hiding the fact that he’s enamoured with Viktor to say the least. A flush appears on Viktor’s cheeks, barely visible in the dark, and he even looks bashful too.

“And what does that make you? A knight?”

“No, the court jester you’re having a sordid affair with,” Jayce grins, earning a giggle from Viktor.

“Alright, alright, let’s actually sleep now.”

“Sorry,” he starts while his mind supplies, I just didn’t want this perfect day to end. “Can I spoon you to sleep?”

“Yeah… You don’t have to ask, you know,” Viktor replies quietly before rolling over expectantly. Pressing up against Viktor’s back, Jayce wraps his arm around him, burying his nose in his hair, breathing him in. They lie there in silence for a couple minutes, and he can feel Viktor drifting off, so it surprises him when his companion speaks. “Thank you, by the way… for the last six months.”

“‘Course… it’s no inconvenience to me.”

“But it should be. You have no obligations or attachments to me and yet… you’ve done nothing but take care of me and help me escape when I need to. I’m saying thank you for… sticking around.”

“I’ll stick around as long as you like having me around,” Jayce whispers before kissing Viktor’s shoulder. He remains silent, however, Viktor places his hand on top of Jayce’s, holding tightly. Brushing his nose against Viktor’s shoulder, he quietly murmurs, “G’night, beautiful.”

“Night, handsome,” Viktor returns before drifting off to sleep. Jayce stays awake for a little longer, just to voyeuristically listen to Viktor breathe in his grasp, chest rising and falling steadily. 

I hope you want me around for a long time. Forever, preferably. Because I know… give me a little more time and I’m bound to fall in love with you.

Saturday, April 6th, 2020

Jayce stirs and cracks his eyes open. Morning light bleeds around the edges of his blackout curtains, barely illuminating the room. He reaches for his phone on the nightstand and sees it’s 8:12 am. The bakery opens at nine… and I’ve got a job to do.

Viktor is curled up on his side next to him, which isn’t an ideal position, but gives him the opportunity to start at Viktor’s neck and work his way down. His hands follow the curve of Viktor’s waist, relishing in the delicate, sleepy sounds he makes as Jayce moves lower and lower.

“‘S time already?” Viktor mumbles, arching his back when Jayce kisses the nape of his neck. 

“Mhm… Time for your reward,” Jayce murmurs in response, placing a hand on Viktor’s hip to gently guide him into rolling over. The other man goes easily, lying on his back and instinctively bending his knees and spreading his legs. Jayce accepts the invitation, climbing in between Viktor’s legs while kissing from his neck to his collarbone. Melting into the sheets, Viktor gasps softly as Jayce paints his clavicle with a new bruise, petting his right thigh all the while. 

“Jayce…” Viktor whispers while Jayce makes his way down his chest, kissing his breast bone, nipples and mastectomy scars. Fingers gently comb through his hair while he strategically places his lips on every mole dotting Viktor’s torso, sinking down until he’s eye-level with his hips. He applies one more love bite to Viktor’s left hipbone, before finally meeting his destination. Dark hair and a heady scent greet Jayce as he spreads his folds apart, lapping at his swollen cock with a low moan.

Morning sex with Viktor is one of Jayce’s favourite things to do. He’s so pliant, practically liquifying in Jayce’s hands that are holding his thighs, and he makes the sweetest sounds that live in Jayce’s head rent free for weeks after. He savours Viktor like a five-course meal from a Michelin Star restaurant, revelling in the feeling of his fingertips massaging his scalp as he does. 

When Viktor comes, Jayce drinks in his release, lapping at his entrance until he’s trembling and curling his toes from sensitivity. Eventually, when Viktor has lost the ability to breathe, he taps Jayce’s head to signal for him to stop. Jayce has no problem listening, kissing up Viktor’s body instead before reaching his mouth. Placing both hands on Jayce’s bearded cheeks, Viktor draws him in for a kiss, lazy with drowsy bliss. The kiss doesn’t last long though, because Viktor pulls back and whispers, “I’m going back to sleep. Be safe getting my pastries.”

Jayce chuckles, kissing the mole beneath Viktor’s right eye. “I’ll make sure they come back in one piece.”

“I meant you, dingus,” Viktor huffs with half-lidded eyes, like he’s about to fall asleep at any moment. Jayce’s chest tightens at the small gesture of care—he cares about me. I’m not just a good lay to him—pushing him to kiss Viktor one more time. He’s firm and intentional, kissing him like it might be the last time, even though that would only be true if he no longer had a pulse.

“Sleep well,” he murmurs before climbing out of bed. By the time he’s done with his morning routine, dressed in a pair of sweats and a Piltover Eagles shirt from his days in collegiate basketball, Viktor is already curled into a ball, fast asleep. 

For the next hour, Jayce gets ready for when Viktor will be awake. He walks to the bakery and picks up a selection of pastries and a bag of the bakery’s signature roast. When he gets back to his condo, he starts a pot of coffee, hoping it’s to Viktor’s standards. Finally, wanting to add something savoury to their breakfast, he fries up some thick cut bacon.

When the coffee maker beeps, he hears the sink in his bathroom. A minute later, Viktor emerges from his bedroom, dressed in a loose pair of boxers and a soft blue t-shirt that make him look dreamy. He rubs sleep from his eyes as he walks toward the kitchen island, grumbling, “That better not be weak ass Target coffee.”

“Nope. It’s the bakery’s signature roast,” Jayce grins as he finishes frying the bacon. “Good morning. How’d you sleep?”

“Mm, not bad. I’m a little sore, though. My back, my legs, my pussy—pretty much everywhere. Worth it, though,” Viktor snorts as he takes a seat at the island. “What did you get at the bakery?”

“Chocolate croissants, strawberry danishes, and lemon blueberry scones.” 

“Sounds like a delicious selection. Can’t wait to try them.”

Taking the pan off the heating element, Jayce steps away to grab two mugs from his cupboard. He doesn’t even think about what he grabs, blindly setting them on the island counter before he grabs the coffee pot. Viktor snorts again behind him and Jayce looks over his shoulder, furrowing his brows. “What?”

“‘I’ll do a² + b² = c², I’ll even do A = 𝜋r², but y + mx + b, that’s where I draw the line’?” Viktor questions with amusement, turning the mug towards him. “The slope-intercept of a line. Cute pun.”

“Oh, heh… My old professor gave that to me years ago. I think you’re the only person outside the office that got it,” Jayce replies, pouring each of them a cup of coffee.

“I didn’t realize you were a math guy.”

“Oh, yeah, I guess I never mentioned,” Jayce laughs awkwardly, shrugging as he puts the pot back and begins to put the bacon on a plate with paper towels. “I do a lot of math for work.” 

“Me too. And I like just doing math. My friends like to test and time me for fun,” Viktor shrugs. “Since I was a kid I have been calculating the Fibonacci series to occupy my mind or stim too. It’s like my own version of counting sheep.”

“Wait… How far in the series did you get?”

“I’ve only been able to get to two hundred before falling asleep. I find it soothing.”

Jayce stops patting the bacon grease away from the bacon to stare at Viktor. “What?”

“What?” Viktor blinks.

“... What’s the 200th number in the Fibonacci sequence?”

His companion sighs, rolling his eyes. “Are you really going to make me do this?” 

“Yes,” Jayce immediately responds, pulling out his phone and googling the exact number. “Go for it.”

“28057117…” Viktor starts without hesitation, and Jayce follows along on the google result which is, so far, correct. 

“299251014003…” Still correct.  

“761193241303…” Oh my God, he’s not kidding. 

“8677189525,” Viktor finishes, letting out a deep breath. “Easier to do in my head. My mouth is too slow.”

“Puta Madre,” Jayce mutters, looking back up from his phone to Viktor. “That was so fucking hot.”

Viktor barks out a laugh, shaking his head. “You’re such a nerd.”

“Excuse me? I’m the nerd? You just recited a—” Jayce looks down at his phone to count for a few seconds. “—forty-two digit answer to a math problem from memory.”

Grinning, Viktor continues to tease him. “Yeah, but do you think I could get you hard by doing a bit of advanced calculus?” 

“Most definitely,” he grins.

Taking a sip of coffee, Viktor hums in surprise. “Wow, this isn’t bad. I like it, even though it’s a medium roast.”

“I’m glad the local coffee critic approves,” Jayce chuckles before setting a plate of bacon and the box of pastries in front of Viktor. “Take your pick. I want one of each but I’m willing to negotiate.”

“I want one of each too,” Viktor says, picking out each pastry from the box and placing it on his plate. Jayce eventually follows suit and sits next to him at the island. They spend the next hour talking about more favourite movies and books while they take their time eating, 

It’s nearly noon when Viktor looks at his phone and announces, “I should really get going home. Rio’s already mad I missed her breakfast time.”

“For sure, can’t keep the princess waiting much longer,” Jayce agrees with amusement.

Ten minutes later, Viktor is dressed in his braces and sweats, approaching the door to slip on a pair of green Crocs he packed. He shoulders his bag and looks up at Jayce with an expression that says he doesn’t actually want to leave. “I know I’ve said it like a hundred times at this point, but… thank you. I had a really shitty week and I needed this.”

Smiling gently, Jayce responds with, “Yeah, me too. I appreciate you agreeing to go out with me.”

“Yeah… Fuck buddy dates can be a thing from now on,” Viktor smirks before leaning up on his tip-toes. Jayce meets him halfway and kisses him softly, cupping his cheek and brushing his thumb over his angular cheekbone. When they part, they stare into each other’s eyes for a long moment. The golden honey hues of Viktor’s irises are alight in the high-noon sun pouring in through the glass wall, and Jayce doesn’t think anything could possibly be more beautiful.

Pulling away and opening the door, Viktor looks over his shoulder and says, “See you later, Jay.”

“Bye, Vik. Drive safely,” he replies, watching Viktor disappear down the hall to the elevator before he finally closes his door.

Sunday, April 7th, 2020

“So, how’d your ‘date’ go?” Cait asks teasingly. They’re at Sunday morning brunch, which they do at least once a month, at Caitlyn’s favourite restaurant. It’s much more upscale compared to the diner he and Viktor went to on Friday, but Jayce admittedly likes their eggs benedict.

“It was a date but we’re not saying it was—well, we called it a ‘fuck buddy date’,” Jayce replies, sighing wistfully. “We held hands on the drive to dinner. We talked about living together and what our dream house would be. We cuddled and made out at the movies. Then we stayed up until 4 am talking. It was absolutely a date.”

“Well, it does sound like a date, I’ll give you that,” she says as she sips her coffee. “I’m just worried you’re going to get burned by this… situationship you’re in. Especially if you keep looking at it like you are dating.”

“I know, I know,” Jayce deflates, mirroring her by taking a sip of his coffee too. “Look, he’s really adverse to relationships. I’m in it for the long game. Eventually, he’s going to see that we’re a good fit.”

“And what if he doesn’t? What if it freaks him out?”

“I mean… I’m anticipating it freaking him out, so, I’m kinda ahead of the game… right?”

“Well, what’s your plan if he freaks out?”

Jayce is quiet for a long moment because he hasn’t thoroughly thought out his strategy. “Appeal to his practical side. I don’t think we’re a good fit just because of feelings, there’s factual reasons why we’re a good match.”

“Okay, like what? Make your case to me,” she urges, folding her hands under her chin.

“Well… We have really good chemistry—not just sexual, but emotional and intellectual too. We make each other laugh and have a lot in common. We’ve spent hours talking, or watching things together, or even just doing our own things—parallel playing, y’know? He’s autistic, I have ADHD. We both like math—”

“Ew, math,” she teases, smirking. “Okay, so you have some solid points. I just worry he’s going to turn a blind eye to all your evidence given how relationship-adverse you’ve said he is.”

“Yeah, I know… But, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”

Their conversation moves on to Caitlyn’s mother wanting her to date within Piltover high society and her wanting nothing to do with the likes of socialites, plus Caitlyn’s efforts to earn detective. They say goodbye around one, and Jayce is grateful he has the rest of the day to himself.

When he gets back to his condo, he does exactly what he’s been itching to do since he woke up: go to his studio. He opens up the second bedroom, opposite of his own, and his sanctuary welcomes him home. Various art he’s done plaster the walls, mostly his favourites from the last nearly two decades of his life. His beat-up white desk, splattered with acrylic paint and scarred from various projects over the years, sits in the corner next to the worn green armchair from his dad’s old study. The Song of Achilles that he borrowed from Viktor is lying on the side table where he had been reading last night. Two easels are set up, both with canvases sitting on them, one a large portrait and the other a medium square. Both are realistic portraits, the large one being a tribute to his father with only the sketch completed so far, and the other…

Viktor’s honey eyes stare at him from the canvas. It’s the most developed detail of the painting so far, only because, as he said in the first five minutes of meeting him, he believes they’re enchanting. The rest of the portrait is only partially developed, with the base and first layers of shadows and highlights for everything else. His vision is of Viktor facing the right with his head turned toward the viewer, wearing the same emerald green sweater he had worn on Christmas Eve against a teal backdrop. The expression is intended to be mysterious, because that’s what Viktor is to him—a mystery he’s trying to solve. 

I don’t know if I’ll ever be brave enough to give this to him, Jayce thinks as he picks up his palette and the tube of chocolate brown paint for Viktor’s hair. He had spent almost twenty minutes browsing paints at the art store, trying to figure out the perfect shade. 

As Jayce spends his afternoon bringing Viktor to life on canvas, a terrifying thought echoes in the back of his mind.

I might be falling for him.

Chapter Text

Friday, May 8th, 2020 - Saturday, May 9th, 2020

Something happens in May, something unexpected. Viktor receives a package, a package with his name on it. A package that Jayce is holding. 

Glancing down momentarily at the box, he sees that, yes, it does in fact say Viktor Cermak in big bold letters that are impossible to miss. Shit.

“Uh, hey, it was at the foot of your driveway. I didn’t mean to… um… are you Czech?” Jayce asks, holding the package out to Viktor with a nervous smile. 

“How did you…?” Looking closer at the package he realizes… It's his Czech candy and snacks that he ordered over a week ago. Glaring up at Jayce, Viktor takes the package with a huff. “Maybe.”

“Maybe?” Jayce looks amused now with a shit-eating grin. “See, that was one of my guesses. I also thought Polish or possibly Hungarian.”

Turning from the Jayce and walking away, Viktor mutters, “Skvělé, teď zná moje příjmení. Jako by toho už nevěděl dost.”

“I’m guessing you’re pissed I found out your last name,” Jayce says as he enters Viktor’s home. He’s wearing a dark grey suit this time that he looks particularly delectable in and there’s a duffle bag hanging off his shoulder, which he must have already packed when he went to work. Viktor is too annoyed to fully appreciate the view, and it should concern him that it’s annoyance he feels and not paranoia for being exposed. “Would we be square if I told you mine? And I promise not to google you.”

“That might make things worse,” Viktor says as he sets the package on his kitchen table. He pauses and rethinks it, because… well, maybe it would make him feel less annoyed. Equal exchange. Jayce walks into the kitchen, eyeing him while loosening his navy tie, as if he’s worried Viktor might kick him out for an indiscretion that he didn’t intend to commit. Sighing, Viktor says, “You know what, fine. What’s your last name? Just so we’re on the same page. And yes, mutual agreement of no googling, please.” 

Outstretching his hand, Jayce gives him a charming smile. It reminds Viktor of the night they met almost eight months ago. “Jayce Talis.”

Talis. It’s not a typical Mexican surname but what do I know? Rolling his eyes, Viktor takes Jayce’s hand and shakes it. “Viktor Cermak.”

“Cermak is a pretty name. I’m half Venezuelan and half Mexican, by the way. I was born in the U.S. though,” Jayce says while retracting his hand. “Are you from Czechia?” 

Viktor chews on his bottom lip, debating whether or not he should divulge anything more. Seven months ago, he would have kicked Jayce out for asking such a question, but at this point… it’s not the most intimate thing Jayce would know about him. Fuck it. I might as well give him my life story. “Yes. I moved here with my mom when I was eight. To start a new life without my dad, basically. Also, you were sort of close. I’m actually a quarter Czech, a quarter Polish and half Romani.”

“Romani? Definitely wouldn’t have guessed that.”

“Yeah. My grandparents on my dad’s side moved to Czechia—Czechoslovakia at the time—in ‘59, before he was born. Both countries were behind the Iron Curtain but Czechia was more industrially and politically stable… you know, aside from the communism. I took my mom’s maiden name after we moved here, but my dad’s parents changed their family name to a Czech one in hopes of avoiding anti-Romani racism, especially for my dad. It was a good thing too because by the 70s they were putting Romani children in segregated schools.”

Jayce blinks. “I… didn’t know any of that. I’m clearly not well-versed in oppression in European history. Do you know any Polish or Romani?”

“I knew some basic Polish but I’ve entirely forgotten it. My mom wasn’t even fluent in it. My father was fluent in Romani though, so I knew a decent amount as a kid. But, I haven’t spoken it in over two decades. We almost exclusively spoke Czech in our household. Even when my mom and I moved to America, we spoke Czech half the time. Because I’m so… removed from that part of my family tree, I don’t even see myself as Romani. I am ethnically, but it doesn’t feel like an identity I can really claim because I’ve only ever identified with two cultural labels: Czech and Zaunite,” Viktor explains, but pauses for a moment. “I’m digging through my brain to see if I even remember any Romani… Bachtalo… me anav si Viktor? Me sim… trinvardesh thaj duj thaj… gay. I don’t know the word for gay.” His pronunciation is shaky but, for the most part, it sounds right.

“Hello, my name is Viktor and… what else did you say?”

“I’m thirty-two and gay, at least I think I remember my numbers. Anyway… what about you? How did your parents end up here?”

“My dad immigrated from Mexico to Boston when he was a teenager. My abuelo was able to move the family here for his career because he was an expert metal worker and designed tools. He ended up changing the family name to sound more ‘American’—our grandparents are kinda similar in that way. Apparently, he chose Talis because it comes from the Greek word thállō, which means ‘to flourish’. He thought it’d bring the family good luck,” Jayce shrugs with a lopsided smile. 

“My dad followed in his footsteps. He decided to go into engineering, designing power tools specifically. On the other hand, when my mom moved here from Venezuela when she was twenty-two, she was finishing her teaching degree in an exchange program. She met my dad at a PA sorority party when he was just finishing his masters. They got married a year later, so she never left,” Jayce offers with a smile. 

Viktor feels greedy with this information—spoiled even—and he inexplicably wants more. I could listen to him talk about his life for hours… That's a bad sign.

Continuing after Viktor is silent for too long, Jayce asks, “Mind if I ask about the alcoholic asshole?” 

“Haven’t seen him since I left Prague in ‘96. Same with my paternal grandparents, though I expect they might have passed by now given that they’d be in their eighties if they were still around,” Viktor shrugs nonchalantly. I shouldn’t ask. I shouldn’t ask. “What about your dad? You… mentioned going to your mom’s for Christmas.” Fuck. I have so little impulse control with him.

“Oh, you remember?” Jayce’s smile turns sombre, and he looks down at the linoleum floor to avoid Viktor’s gaze. “Yeah, uh… he died when I was eleven. His car skidded on some black ice during a blizzard when he was on his way home from work.”

Viktor’s heart sinks like a stone to the ocean floor as he digests the information, and the memory of Jayce crying on New Year’s Eve resurfaces. That’s why snow makes him anxious. That’s why he was crying that night, and I was the distraction from that. He’s just like me. “I… I’m so sorry, Jayce.”

“It’s okay, it was… it was a long time ago,” Jayce says quietly, but his heart isn’t in the dismissal whatsoever. Viktor’s chest aches to do something, to somehow take away the pain, and he feels powerless because he’s been trying to take away his own for fourteen years. He is intimately familiar with what losing a parent too young can do to you, and he knows Jayce is only putting up a front—the same front Viktor puts up whenever his mother comes up. 

He also knows by now that Jayce takes comfort in touch, which Viktor has learned he himself takes comfort in now too.

Stepping closer, Viktor reaches up to cradle Jayce’s face in one hand. Hazel eyes lift to meet his own, looking at him curiously. He maintains his gaze as he brushes his thumb over Jayce’s bearded cheek, swallowing the lump in his throat preventing him from speaking. “It’s not okay. That must have been really hard on you. Eleven is really young to lose a parent, and in such a… traumatic way,” he practically whispers. His heart tightens further as he prepares himself to voice his own trauma he avoids at all costs, but Jayce knows so much of it by now that it doesn’t feel so scary to voice. “You… You know my mom died when I was eighteen. It was lung cancer. Four years of it.”

“I can’t imagine how difficult that was. It’s a fucking awful thing to go through, and losing your only parent like that… I’m so sorry, Vik,” Jayce murmurs, reaching up to brush a lock of hair out of Viktor’s face then cup his cheek. Their irises are locked, like both of them are trying to determine where to go from here, staring off the edge of a precipice as if they would be plummeting headlong into unknown territory. 

There’s a different kind of tension in the air from the usual sexual electricity between them, and Viktor doesn’t know what to think when both of them lean in at the same time. It’s not a rush for contact as they normally would, it’s gradual and hesitant when their lips brush together. Viktor is the one to initiate the slow embrace, still tenderly holding Jayce’s face with one hand, and Jayce responds with just as much tenderness.

Putting his crutch down against the table, Viktor loops his other arm around Jayce’s neck to support himself and bring his companion closer. Jayce’s hands find his waist, not squeezing or grabbing as he likes to do but just holding. This isn’t our usual hook up, Viktor realizes as Jayce slides his hands down his body before picking Viktor up gently. It reminds me of when we had sex on the anniversary. It was so intimate I thought it might break me. 

There's an unspoken feeling behind the kiss that’s unfamiliar. While they’ve been affectionate, intimate, and vulnerable before, there's something that feels… new. Something intimidating.

Carrying him to the bedroom, Jayce continues their slow and deliberate kiss, rarely parting from Viktor’s mouth. When they get undressed, he kisses every mole and touches every inch of Viktor’s body like he’s something to be worshipped. The sex is unlike anything Viktor has experienced before. When Jayce is buried inside him and clinging to him, he whispers praises and kisses his hair like he’s precious. And Viktor reciprocates because, while they didn’t get into the weeds about their losses, he knows they both need a gentle embrace of limbs and lips. It’s usually all teeth, rough hands and getting pounded into the mattress, but Jayce is careful and attentive. It makes Viktor feel like his bones are made of glass and his heart, barely protected by his vitreous ribcage, is nothing but a ruin waiting to crumble. 

Jayce kisses him when Viktor comes, swallowing down his whimpers of pleasure. Clinging to him, Viktor digs his nails into Jayce’s shoulders while Jayce keeps going, pressed chest to chest, muttering in Spanish against his neck with a reverent tone. In the post-orgasm haze, Viktor thinks this is what making love might feel like. He’s never done it before, so he wouldn’t know, but he’ll take a close second. 

After Jayce fills him up with his release, he pulls out and goes to lie next to him. However, Viktor holds onto him and drags him down until he’s resting his head against Viktor’s chest, curled into his side. 

Combing his fingers through Jayce’s hair, Viktor lays there quietly. He even decides to take Jayce’s hand in his, brushing his thumb over his knuckle. He knows he’s being overly affectionate, but he can’t help himself. There’s a desire for Jayce to know he cares and he’s safe with him, especially after how much care Jayce gave him on the anniversary of his mom’s death. Viktor is too scared to voice that, though. 

After a while of silently cuddling, he has the impulse to say, “My mom loved chrysanthemums. Yellow was her favourite colour, so I bought her yellow chrysanthemums every week when she was in the hospital, then the hospice.” 

Jayce squeezes his hand and rubs his bearded cheek against Viktor’s chest, slightly itching his skin. “That explains the photos,” he murmurs in thought then falls into silence for a few seconds. “My dad loved The Beatles. We played Hey Jude at his funeral—it’s what he wanted. And his favourite food was my mom’s spicy chicken empanadas. After he was gone, they became a comfort meal. Me and Ma make them every Día de Muertos to honour him.”

“My mom made the best chicken paprikash. Whenever I’m having a bad day, I try to make it. We cooked together a lot, so I feel like she’s here with me when I do,” Viktor whispers, feeling his eyes sting. “She made it for me the night she told me she got diagnosed. The first time. So, sometimes, it hurts too much to make…”

Jayce goes quiet again, rubbing his thumb over Viktor’s as they continue to hold hands. When he speaks, his voice cracks from emotion. “Sometimes I go down to the harbour to be close to him because he loved fishing there. He took me dozens of times as a kid. Haven’t been in a boat since before he died though.”

Viktor hums in acknowledgement, and he can’t help but bridge the conversation to a memory. “The last time I was on a boat was going to the Statue of Liberty with my mom. We went to New York City together the year she was in remission, when I was sixteen.” 

Jayce squeezes Viktor’s hand, like he can sense the unspoken turmoil from that trip, before he says, “I went to Mexico with my parents the summer before he died. He wanted to show me where he grew up in Oaxaca and it’s still one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever been… I want to go back again.”

Viktor’s heart is tightening in his chest, wound up like an impossibly tangled knot, because talking about it and relating to someone over losing a parent is painful. He’s talked to Powder and Vi about their own loss, but he could only relate so much because they were five and eight when their parents died. Powder barely remembers their birth parents, and Vi doesn’t like to talk about it either. 

Never did I think that I’d find this kind of companionship in a random man who flirted with me at a bar almost eight months ago. 

Jayce isn’t his boyfriend, but they agreed they were companions, which still scares him. It’s terrifying to be known. “Do you have a comfort movie or show?”

“Oh, I’m not sure…” Jayce starts, seemingly thrown off by the sudden change in topic. “I would say either The X-Files or Parks and Rec for shows. Comfort movie… Dirty Dancing?”

“Dirty Dancing I get, but The X-Files? Why?” 

“I love conspiracy theories, aliens, and both Mulder and Scully are hot.”

Viktor makes a sound of amusement, continuing to pet Jayce’s hair. “You know, that’s kind of funny. Parks and Rec is my comfort show too. Any season after Adam Scott comes in.”

“Really? Why?”

“I just really like his and Leslie’s relationship. They have really good chemistry and it’s one of the best parts of the show. Plus, co-workers to lovers is a good trope… and I think he’s kinda hot in a nerdy way.”

“Agreed… but why are you asking this?”

“I was going to ask if you want to eat pizza and watch Parks and Rec.” 

“Absolutely. I can’t think of a better way to spend a Friday night,” Jayce says, kissing the centre of Viktor’s chest.

So they do exactly that. Viktor orders a large pizza, half cheese and half meat lovers, and cheesy garlic bread for them and they sit and watch the end of season two of Parks and Rec. After they eat, Viktor settles against Jayce’s side, resting his head on his shoulder. It’s nice but it fuels the delusions he’s been having since Christmas. 

I wish I could have this. Maybe one day I will. It just can’t be with Jayce. He’s never expressed interest in being more than fuck buddies, so why would he? It’s just… nice to pretend. 

Five episodes in, Viktor is inexplicably resting his head on a pillow in Jayce’s lap. He dozes off with Jayce’s fingers combing through his hair and in the sleepy haze he remembers when his mom used to do the same. 

“Hey, baby, you wanna get ready for bed?” Jayce’s voice rouses him some time later. Viktor doesn’t even register the pet name at first.

He groans, rolling over in Jayce’s lap to bury his face in his stomach. “Five minutes…”

With a fond sigh, Jayce agrees, “Okay, five minutes.” 

Viktor enjoys every second of those five minutes. He relishes in the feeling of Jayce’s nails gently scratching his scalp while he cards his fingers through his hair. The scent of Jayce’s laundry detergent on his old Star Wars t-shirt floods his nose. Echoing in his head is Jayce’s voice saying ‘baby’, over and over again. It all contributes to a beautiful fantasy where this is his life with Jayce.

Half asleep, Viktor reluctantly gets ready next to Jayce, brushing his teeth while watching his fuck buddy do the same. That fantasy had carried over from his dozing state to reality. He can’t stop thinking about Jayce being his… something. Viktor doesn’t want a boyfriend, he just wants a warm body to give him affection. Still, he buys into the fantasy as they get in bed and he rolls toward Jayce who rolls on his side to face him. 

“Goodnight, baby,” Viktor dares to whisper, brushing his hand over Jayce’s cheek. He hears Jayce’s breath catch in his throat and they both lean in slowly out of uncertainty.

“Not yet,” Jayce murmurs before their lips meet with a similar passion as earlier, all hesitant licks and the slightest bit of teeth. He’s pleasantly surprised when Jayce’s hands are on him, following the curve of his waist, over his hip, then between his legs. 

Jayce fucks him while lying behind him and holding Viktor against his chest. His fingers move steadily around Viktor’s cock while Jayce rocks his hips at a leisurely pace. “Eres mio. Nunca te dejaré ir, cariño,” Jayce whispers when he’s close, breath hot against his ear. Viktor has no fucking clue what he said, but the intimate moment pushes him over the edge and he cries Jayce’s name when he comes. Not a minute later, Jayce bites his shoulder while he releases inside him, holding Viktor’s pelvis flush to his own so he can stay buried inside.

The sleep that follows is some of the best in his recent memory. When he wakes up in the morning, he glances at the clock and sees it’s 8:28 am. Jayce is spooning him, his arm weighing heavy around his waist. It feels nice, so nice that Viktor decides to indulge in the fantasy again. It’s a Saturday morning, I have nowhere to go, so I’m going to go back to sleep while cuddling with my boyfriend.

When he wakes up again, he’s alone. The clock reads 10:36 am, a bit late for him to still be in bed, and he immediately misses the weight of Jayce’s arm holding him. For a brief moment, he wonders if Jayce went home and his heart sinks. 

It would be shitty if he left without saying goodbye. Especially after… whatever last night was.

He hears the coffee maker beep in the kitchen. The thoughts immediately dissipate and the dreadful feeling he had before is replaced with warmth. Jayce stayed and he’s making us coffee. Of course he’s being sweet, as always.

“Hey baby,” Jayce’s voice comes from the doorway. “I made breakfast, you hungry?”

Viktor sits up and rubs the sleep from his eyes. Huh. I did not imagine Jayce saying that outside of sex, it seems. He appreciates the view of Jayce wearing nothing but his pyjama pants from last night and his glasses, hair still mussed from sleep. “You made breakfast?”

“Yeah, hope you don’t mind that I raided your kitchen,” Jayce says with a soft grin. “I assumed you’d eat pancakes.”

“What kind?” Glancing at the floor, he grabs the closest shirt to the bed, not even looking at it, and pulls it on. He’ll get underwear after but he just doesn’t want to feel so exposed.

“Banana chocolate chip.” Jayce’s eyes travel down to Viktor’s chest and he smirks. “That’s my shirt.”

Viktor glances down and, yes, he’s wearing Jayce’s Return of the Jedi t-shirt. “Well… it’s mine now, I guess.”

Humming, Jayce continues to observe him with a lopsided smile. “You know what? It looks better on you anyway.”

“Thank you.” Viktor makes his way to his dresser and fetches a pair of loose boxers and pulls them over his hips, keeping his socks on still before he grabs his crutch.

Jayce walks ahead to the kitchen and Viktor follows. There’s a plate piled with sizable pancakes, enough for leftovers, and a full pot of coffee waiting for them. He feels his stomach growl and watches Jayce get plates and mugs out. It shouldn’t be surprising that by now Jayce knows where he keeps his kitchenware after all the times they’ve eaten together at his place. Then he notices Rio’s wet food bowl, licked clean. “Did you… Did you feed Rio?”

“Yeah, she was crying when I got up and I’ve seen you feed her at least a dozen times by now, so I knew what to do.”

Viktor flushes subtly but shakes it off. “Thank you for doing all of this.” 

“It’s nothing, you’re usually the one who makes me breakfast,” Jayce says as he puts three pancakes on his plate. “How many you want? You can go sit, by the way. I’ll get everything.”

“Two.” While Viktor is usually uncomfortable with people doing things for him, he can recognize that Jayce is just doing it because he’s generous and considerate. Not bothering to resist, he sits down at the table and waits for Jayce. 

Moments later, he’s setting down plates and cutlery before going back for coffee. When Jayce opens Viktor’s fridge, he furrows his brows. Pulling a small carton of oat coffee creamer out, he looks at Viktor with confusion. “You have coffee creamer?” 

“I knew you were coming over,” Viktor shrugs, trying to act indifferent, though he can feel that damned flush reaching his cheeks again. 

Jayce grins, and Viktor can sense that he wants to tease him, but he spares him. “And you knew to get oat?” 

“You’re always getting those disgusting oat lattes. I figured you’d like it… and I thought I saw it in your fridge last time I was at your place.”

“Why do you hate oat milk, by the way?” 

“I know, rationally, it is better for the environment. However, it has an aftertaste I despise. I don’t mind almond but honestly, I prefer cow’s milk.”

Mixing his coffee quickly and putting the creamer back, Jayce carries their coffees to the table and asks, “Do you like lattes or any specialty drinks like that or just black coffee?” 

“Thank you. Mm… I like espresso by itself,” Viktor replies, taking a sip of his black coffee. “Oh, I do like americanos with cream in them. I drink them more in the summer though.”

“So, why don’t you like lattes?” 

“Because I think they’re just a vehicle for sugar that people call coffee.”

Jayce laughs, cutting into his pancakes with the side of his fork. “You really are a coffee snob.”

“It’s true. I judge a café by its signature roast,” Viktor shrugs, mirroring Jayce. “If I want sugar, I’d rather get baked goods. My favourite café in Zaun has a dark chocolate chip cookie to die for.”

“Okay, okay, I get it. So coffee is like, sacred and not meant to be a dessert?”

“Exactly, unless it’s an affogato—that’s a perfect marriage of the two.”

“Oooh, I love an affogato. What’s your favourite ice cream or gelato flavour?”

“I have similar tastes when it comes to ice cream versus gelato. For ice cream, I want peanut butter and chocolate. Bonus if there’s something crunchy in there like pretzel pieces. If we’re talking gelato, I’d go for nutella or black sesame.”

“Black sesame? I don’t think I’ve had black sesame gelato before.”

”It’s really good. It’s got a rich nutty flavour. What about you?”

“Ice cream, it’s either mint chip or strawberry—can’t go wrong with the classics. For gelato, I usually go for dark chocolate but you’ve got me curious about black sesame.”

“This Japanese gelato shop in the Lanes has it and it makes an incredible affogato. We should go some time.”

“Yeah?” Jayce grins, pausing eating his pancakes. “Today?”

Viktor is in the middle of taking a bite before he blinks at Jayce. “Huh?” 

“Do you wanna go today?”

Oh. Why the fuck did I say we should go? I said it without even realizing it. I could just say I don’t want to—“Yeah. Why not?”

“Admittedly, outside of The Last Drop, I haven’t spent much time in the Lanes. Why don’t we get lunch and you could show me around?”

Fuck. Fuck. This is sounding like a date. I knew that ‘fuck buddy date’ was a bad idea. Fuck. “Okay. Sounds… like a nice plan,” Viktor says with a soft smile, despite his internal panic. “Wait, how does a rich Piltie like you end up having The Last Drop as their regular bar, especially when it’s like a half hour from your place? I never thought to ask.” 

“Simple: the music. It’s hands down the best music venue in this part of Massachusetts.” 

“Really? Doesn’t Piltover have a lot of big, fancy venues?”

“Yeah but, in my opinion, The Last Drop is the best. I like seeing local and indie artists. Some of my favourite indie artists have played there.” 

“Huh… So you listen to a lot of indie music?”

“I listen to a lot of music, period. I love a lot of different things—pop, folk, hard rock, the classics, you name it.” 

“I know you like Sleep Token but do you like other metal?”

“Sleep Token is more like metal adjacent. I like some, but it’s not my go-to. What about you?”

“Not usually my thing. Jazz?”

“You know what, I’m pretty unfamiliar with jazz. Do you like it?”

“I do. There’s a jazz club downtown I really like.” 

“What’s it called?” Jayce pulls his phone out of his pyjama pants while he takes a bite of his pancakes.

“Um… The Emerald Lounge. It’s kind of a Zaun relic. It’s been around since the 20s but it had a huge overhaul a decade ago.” Jayce hums in acknowledgement, doing something on his phone and not looking up at Viktor. Furrowing his brows, Viktor asks, “What are you doing?”

“Seeing who’s playing at The Emerald Lounge tonight,” Jayce says with a smirk, eyes flickering up at Viktor.

“I thought we were getting lunch and affogatos?” Arching a brow at Jayce, Viktor does his best to hide the fact that his heart is pounding in his chest. What the fuck am I doing? Why am I entertaining this? This is just like our ‘fuck buddy date’. That was explicitly a date and I told myself I wouldn’t do it again, only because it’s making me more delusional. And now he calls me ‘baby’ which is just going to make things even worse.

“Here’s what I’m thinking… Lunch at your favourite café, you show me your favourite shops and haunts, we get affogatos, kill some more time, and then get dinner and drinks at the lounge? Apparently some famous jazz singer from New York is performing tonight.”

God, that sounds… amazing. “I mean… I have no plans,” Viktor says coyly over his cup of coffee, trying to hide the smile he’s having a hard time fighting back. Fuck. I’m acting like a lead in a romcom being romanced by a debonair gentleman. Remember, he’s not dating you. He just wants to hang out.

“It’s settled then. I was anticipating lying around your place all day but I think going out would be a lot of fun.”

“Did you even bring anything jazz-lounge-appropriate?” 

“Didn’t I leave one of my dress shirts here? I could just wear that and my slacks from yesterday.”

Jayce did, in fact, leave a shirt there. Viktor has been self-indulgently wearing it occasionally. “Oh, uh, yeah. I think I know where that is.” It’s in his basket of folded laundry that he’s been meaning to put away for three days now.

“Haven’t seen you dolled up in a while. Lucky me,” Jayce teases as he finishes his pancakes and washes them down with his coffee.

“What, you don’t like me in sweats all the time?” Viktor looks mildly offended but he’s far from it.

“Not at all. I think you look fuckin’ sexy in anything, I just like seeing you dressed up too… you know, sometimes I think about that green turtleneck you wore on Christmas Eve,” Jayce says easily, giving him an adoring look.

The comment makes his cheeks warm and he asks, “Why the turtleneck?”

“You look good in that shade of green and it just hugged you in all the right places. I couldn’t stop staring at your neck and your waist.” Jayce sounds sly when he says it, reaching across the table so his fingertips can follow the metacarpals of Viktor’s hand.

The heat in Viktor’s cheeks intensifies at the compliment and he replies, “Then maybe I’ll find something a little more… form fitting for going out. I certainly can’t wear the turtleneck though, it’s like eighty degrees outside.”

“Definitely don’t want you passing out on me,” Jayce chuckles.

They finish their breakfast and, like the gentleman he is, Jayce does the dishes too. While Viktor puts the leftovers away, he can’t help but think, He made me breakfast and he’s doing the dishes. He’s perfect husband material. I’m a little jealous of whoever is going to marry him and probably have his babies. The thought makes him pause, questioning his own sanity. Suddenly dismissing himself, which Jayce doesn’t question, he escapes to his bedroom under the guise of changing and mentally scolds himself. 

Shut up, brain. No, I’m not jealous. I don’t even want to marry or have anyone’s babies. God, is it hormones? Should I be on a higher dose of T again? Is it this goddamn IUD that’s suddenly making me want to be bred? Get it together. 

Shoving his intrusive thoughts aside, he looks for something form-fitting. He doesn’t care to look appropriate for the jazz lounge, he’s more focused on being eye-candy for his date—wait, not a date. Just… a hangout that’s a precursor to getting laid again. He settles on a short sleeved, crystal teal mock turtleneck—not too high and one-hundred percent cotton so it’s breathable—tucked into his high-waisted black capri dress pants. Just when he’s finished getting ready, Jayce comes into his room and whistles lowly.

“Damn, I don’t know how I’m going to keep my hands off of you dressed in that,” Jayce practically growls, immediately stalking toward him and placing his hands on Viktor’s waist. 

He actually appreciates the touch because not having to put all of his weight on his good leg is a relief. “Who says you’ll have to?” He grins cheekily.

“Well, the law.”

“We’ve already broken the law, if I recall correctly.”

“You’re a menace,” Jayce chuckles, leaning in to kiss Viktor—just for the sake of kissing him.

It’s like we’re a goddamn couple, Viktor thinks as he returns the kiss, looping his arms around Jayce’s neck willingly despite the critical thoughts swirling around in his head. I should be putting an end to this, shouldn’t I? But… it’s just an outlet—for both of us. We both crave affection and attention. That’s all this is.

“I just need like… ten minutes, then I’ll be ready to go,” Jayce says when he breaks the kiss, though he doesn’t leave Viktor’s atmosphere. “You want me to drive, by the way?” 

“I’d appreciate it. I like being the passenger prince, I admit.”

With a grin, Jayce replies, “I will happily drive your chariot, your highness.”

“Pfft, you’re such a dork,” Viktor shakes his head and, rather than pull away, he rewards Jayce for his corniness with another kiss. He didn’t even think about it, it was simply his instinctive reaction. This should be a red flag, is the thought he chooses to ignore while he toes the line of making out with his fuck buddy a.k.a. emotional and sexual companion a.k.a. part-time pretend boyfriend.

Grinning when their lips part, Jayce teases, “Yeah, but you like it.” 

“I will never admit to that.”

Viktor finally sits on the bed and waits for Jayce to get ready, watching him change into the navy coloured dress shirt that Viktor had been indulgently keeping. Goodbye to my favourite lounging shirt… “It’s a little early for lunch, so what do you want to do in the meantime?”

“Well, what’s there to do in the Lanes?”

“Lots. Too much, maybe,” Viktor snorts.

Jayce laughs softly, tucking his shirt into the dark grey dress pants he pulls on right after. “Well, what do you like to do?” 

“I like a lot of the shops. There’s quite a few that have been around since before I even moved to Zaun,” he says as he considers his usual stops when he heads downtown. “There’s a huge retro store a block away from The Last Drop. Benzo’s.”

“Retro store? What’d you mean by that?”

“Like… anything nostalgic. Benzo’s got vinyls, video games, toys, comics, collector’s cards—you name it. It started as a thrift store in the 80s but he ended up specializing. I got my first camera from there—a 1972 Olympus OM-1. He refurbished it himself for me in 2001.”

“Wait, do you know this Benzo guy?”

“Eh… yeah, kind of. If you’ve lived in the Lanes as long as I have, you know Benzo. Plus, he was in The Last Drop all the time. I still remember his order—two fingers of Old Overholt on the rocks.”

“Hold on… how do you know the guy’s order?” Jayce glances at Viktor suspiciously now that he’s dressed.

Viktor realizes, in that moment, he gave away a piece of his history that Jayce didn’t know. “Oh, I, uh… I used to work at The Last Drop. It was my first job. Worked there for three years.”

“So, is that how you know Vander and Silco? Because the only person I think you could have learned I was a doctor from is Vander. I vaguely remember mentioning it to him at a charity event in… 2018, I think?” 

“I, um… yes, sort of. It’s a little more complicated than that but, basically. And yes. The Zaun General’s children’s wing fundraiser. I couldn’t go because I was in Boston that weekend for a conference.”

“Man, we could have crossed paths way sooner if you had.”

“Yeah, you think you’d have hit on me at a fundraiser?” Viktor snorts, shaking his head.

“Um, yeah,” Jayce grins handsomely. “If I saw your angelic face, I would’ve at least asked for your number.”

The word ‘angelic’ makes his cheeks turn pink. “Yeah, well, I wouldn’t have given it to you and you know that.”

“Yeah, it only took me two months to get it,” he laughs, fastening his watch to his wrist. “You ready to get going?”

God, I can’t believe how much has changed. I only caved and gave him my number in November. Here we are in May and we’re… what? Going on a date? A ‘fuck buddy date’, if I want to lie to myself again. “Yeah, I’m ready,” Viktor replies, smothering his critical internal monologue as usual and grabbing his crutch. 

Expecting they’ll be out late, Viktor leaves Rio some extra kibble. Before they step out the door, Jayce reminds him, “Don’t forget your lactose pills.” Viktor had absolutely almost forgotten it and the fact that Jayce remembered for him spawns a gust of butterflies in his stomach. Really? I’m getting worked up over him remembering my medication? God, I really am pathetic.

Fifteen minutes later, they get lucky and find street parking not too far from Benzo’s, the café only two blocks in the opposite direction. It’s warm but thankfully cloudy enough that the sun isn’t beating down on them. On the short walk to Benzo’s shop, Viktor ends up holding on to Jayce’s arm—not for support, but just because. This doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t. 

A refreshing burst of cool air greets them when Jayce opens the door, the air conditioning a welcome presence when they get out of the approaching summer heat. The shop is busy and, as always, Benzo is standing at the counter where some of the rarer items are housed in a locked glass case. The large man with greying hair, pronounced sideburns and glasses that look tiny on his round face, perks up at the sight of him. “Well, Viktor Cermak, is that you?” He calls, waving him over. “It’s been a while, my boy!” 

Viktor is unable to resist the smile that clings to his lips, approaching the counter eagerly. It’s been a while since he’s been to Benzo’s shop, but he remembers the first time he met the man when he was ten years old. His mother was buying him a refurbished Game Boy and Benzo took the time to explain how he fixed it. It got him interested in electronics and how things are made in the first place. “It has been a while, Benzo. How are you holding up?”

“Can’t complain! I shared a bottle of wine with your Dad and Pops last week. They said you’re looking to leave Zaun U?”

“Yeah, it seems like my time there might be running its course.”

“That new dean seems real nasty,” the man nods, glancing over Viktor’s shoulder before lowering his voice. “Is that the mysterious man you’ve been seeing?”

Viktor’s gaze follows the older man’s, finding Jayce to his left preoccupying himself with the wall of vinyls barely out of earshot. Turning back to Benzo, he shakes his head. “I’m not… seeing him, seeing him. We’re just kind of… hanging out.”

“Ah, young-people-speak for… what is it you call it now? A situationship? Is that it?”

“It’s not a situationship. It’s just mutually agreed company,” Viktor huffs. “Don’t tell me Vander’s been gossiping about me.”

“Not so much. It’s your sisters you should be worried about.”

“Oh, of course. When were Vi and Pow here?”

“Recently, actually. Maybe an hour ago?”

Viktor’s heart stops, panic washing over him. They might still be on the strip. If they see me out, on a date with Jayce, they won’t let it go. Especially Powder. “Um, well… Thanks for letting me know.”

“Oh, before I forget… I was hoping you’d be coming by because I got a couple new lenses for the OM-1 in,” Benzo shakes his finger before bending down and opening up a drawer. A moment later, he places a box on the counter with packaging straight out of the 70s but still in good condition. “24mm f2.8, still in the box. She’s a nice lens and since I like ya, I’ll give it to you for what I paid for it. Interested?” 

Viktor’s eyes light up. Brand new lenses for a nearly 50-year-old 35mm analogue camera are hard to come by, so it’s about as rare as seeing Halley’s Comet. Maybe not quite, but still similar. “How much?” 

“Two hundred even. Refurbished ones usually come at that price.”

“What’s that?” He hears Jayce ask from his side, pulling Viktor’s attention to him. He’s holding two vinyl sleeves but Viktor can’t tell which albums he’s picked up. 

“That there is an Olympus camera lens produced and packaged in 1974, never opened,” Benzo fills Jayce in. “I’m offering Vik a deal.”

“Is it like… a nice lens?” Jayce blinks, glancing from Benzo to Viktor. “Sorry, I don’t know anything about photography.”

“It’s a wide-angle lens, good for street and landscape photography, which I do like. I’ve also read and seen that it can produce a very beautiful bokeh effect,” Viktor explains, chewing on his bottom lip. 

“Hey, sounds like a good excuse as any to get back into your photography. I remember you saying you wanted to.”

“It’s true… I’ve felt the itch to grab my camera again. All my development supplies are still easily accessible, too…”

“Buuuut…?” Jayce bumps their shoulders together.

“But can I justify a two hundred dollar purchase for a hobby I’ve barely engaged with in the last three years?” He asks, continuing to chew on his bottom lip.

“Hell yeah. Maybe a new toy is just what you need to get back into it. That usually helps me trigger old hyperfixations.”

“Your friend’s got a good head on his shoulders,” Benzo nods to Jayce, though he has a smile on his kind face that says something akin to ‘I approve of this one’.

“You’re saying that because you’re getting money out of me,” he replies with a half-laugh. 

“Hardly. I told ya, I’m offerin’ it for exactly what I paid for it. I wouldn’t be making a dime.”

Silently debating for another few seconds, Viktor finally says, “Then I’ll take it.” Moments later, he pays with his card and Benzo packs the unopened lens in a paper bag. Finally, when he has the unexpected ‘new toy’, Viktor asks Jayce, “What did you find?”

Turning the albums around, Jayce reveals The Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack and Fever by Kylie Minogue. “Essentials for my collection.”

“Oh, yes, essential,” Viktor teases, though he does agree with an earnest nod. “You want to browse a little more? I always like looking at the toy section for the nostalgia.”

“Uh, duh. I was planning on dragging you that way anyways.”

They spend the next hour browsing Benzo’s wares, sharing one childhood memory after another about first Nintendo games, dead Tamagotchis and how badly they both wanted a Furby. After they make the trip back to Jayce’s car to drop off their purchases, they end up heading to the café arm-in-arm again. However, just as they’re walking up to the café, a flash of blue and pink exit the shop. Viktor immediately registers that he is, in fact, looking at Vi and Powder, who are about to turn and see him and Jayce.

“Hide,” Viktor says suddenly, yanking Jayce towards the alley next to the shop. He leans against the wall and does his best to conceal his crutch so it isn’t noticed, then he pulls Jayce in close. “Make out with me. Now.”

“Wha—”

“Now.” 

Viktor, fortunately, doesn’t need to prompt Jayce again because he dives in and begins to kiss him as though their lives depend on it. His brain feels like it’s split into two, though—one half focused on listening for his sisters, the other melting away from the kiss. He hooks his arms around Jayce’s neck, holding him close while they kiss, and praying that his companion’s broad body will conceal him from being recognized.

“Your dating life sounds like a hot mess, Vi,” he overhears Powder say before she slurps her undoubtedly sugary drink. 

“Ugh, I know. I feel like I’ve been cursed by a witch or somethin’,” Vi’s voice travels past them, all while Jayce’s tongue invades his mouth.

I’m pretty sure they’re gone but… waiting a little longer wouldn’t hurt, he thinks as he sighs into the kiss, a flare of arousal spiking when Jayce presses him flush against the brick wall. Viktor entirely forgets the reason they were making out in the first place, so lost in Jayce’s embrace that he doesn’t pull away for at least a full minute. “They’re gone.” 

Jayce blinks. “Who were we hiding from?” 

“My sisters.”

“Oh, shit—” Jayce pauses and blinks again. “Wait, why are we hiding from your sisters?”

“Because they… well, my youngest sister in particular has been making a big deal out of… you.”

“Uh… what about me?”

“Well, I… I mean, you know…”

“No, I don’t know, Vik…”

Sighing, Viktor finally spells it out. “They keep calling you my boyfriend and insist I date you. I keep trying to explain to them that neither of us want a relationship and this is just… filling a hole in our lives.”

There’s an unreadable expression on Jayce’s face for a moment, which is rare because by now, he knows Jayce’s mannerisms pretty well. Is he… displeased with this? Confused? I can’t tell.

“Right,” Jayce lets out an awkward laugh and shakes his head, the sudden shift in his expression forgotten. “I mean, you could say I’m your boyfriend just to get them off your back? For now.”

Your boyfriend. The words repeat, bouncing off each wrinkle of his brain, and his only other thought is, if only that were true. Until said paralyzed wrinkles of his brain reactivate and he thinks, Wait, no. I don’t want a boyfriend. Stop fantasizing. “Not a terrible idea, but if I keep ‘dating’ you,” he says, pausing to make air quotes. “Then they would insist on meeting you. I love them but they’re a little nosy.”

“Well, what’s your solution?”

“Avoid and deny until what we have ends.” The words taste bitter on his tongue because, so far, he’s been avoiding the fact that whatever he has with Jayce will not last forever.

The same unreadable expression crosses Jayce’s face again, but it doesn’t fade like last time. “And when do you anticipate that will be?”

The question causes a wave of nausea to wash over him, and the ‘when’ stings. I told Powder it was a matter of when. I told her it will end, eventually. That’s still true. So why am I so… worked up? “I, um… I don’t know. I’m having a lot of fun and, obviously, the sex is great so… I don’t have any plans to end it. At least not any time soon.”

I wonder… would he wait until I was ready for a relationship? I don’t know when that would be but… I haven’t even remotely wanted one until him. Maybe I’m just having all these complicated thoughts because I’m not ready to let him go yet. Yeah. That’s probably it.

“Yeah, I get it. Just, uh… don’t blindside me, y’know? If you think you’re getting to a point where you want to end things, try to let me know sooner rather than later. I just hate… unexpected changes.” 

“Right. Same to you,” Viktor agrees, clearing his throat. “Anyway, the coast is definitely clear now. Ready to get lunch?”

“Yeah.”

The awkwardness has passed by the time they order their lunch. Viktor pays for it because it’s his turn to treat Jayce, which he’s happy to do because Jayce has spoiled him in the last few months. They sit down at one of the tables in the garden patio behind the café with their food and drinks, and Jayce takes a look around. The Admirael Café’s secret garden is one of Viktor’s favourite places in Zaun, full of tulips of every colour with monarch and swallowtail butterflies lingering on their vibrant petals. A gentle breeze from the nearby harbour carries the flowers’ scent to their wrought iron garden table. The peaceful atmosphere alone makes Viktor grateful he agreed to go out with Jayce in the first place.

“This place is beautiful. I didn’t know this was here in the Lanes, of all places,” Jayce comments, taking a sip of his iced mocha. “And this might be the best mocha I’ve ever had.”

Viktor grins, feeling as though he won a battle of some sort. “Told you. This place actually used to be a flower shop that opened in the 60s, that’s why the garden is here. I remember it too. The owner died in the mid-00s and she had no next of kin, so the property was put up for sale. Then it got turned into this café. I’ve been coming here since they opened in 2009.”

“You’re like a local history expert,” Jayce says, picking up his cold turkey, cranberry and brie sandwich. “You really like living in Zaun, don’t you?”

“I do. Like I’ve said, I’ve been living here most of my life. It’s home. There are a few places in Piltover I like but… in my opinion, Zaun has better everything,” Viktor teases, picking up his toasted prosciutto, pear, gruyere and honey sandwich—his favourite off the menu. 

“What’s your favourite thing about living in Zaun?”

Humming as he takes a bite of his sandwich, he considers his answer while he chews. “The culture, I think, which is a blend of dozens of cultures. Zaun is mostly immigrants, or first and second generation, because it’s far more affordable than Piltover or Boston. Though, the Lanes has gotten a lot more pricey over the last twenty years.” 

Putting down his sandwich, Viktor subtly points northwest while he continues. “My old apartment that I had with my mom is a block north on Blitz Street. Two bedrooms, one bath, 1,200 square feet, heat and water included. We paid $1,150 in 1998 and by the time I moved out in 2014, thanks to rent control, I was only paying $1,800. I recently took a look, out of curiosity, to see what it goes for now. Can you guess?”

“Uh… $2,400?”

“$3,000.”

“Holy shit. Tripling in twenty years is crazy. Also, wait… you lived in the same apartment for sixteen years?”

“Yeah. I had no reason to leave,” he shrugs. “I liked living in the Lanes, I had a lot of space, the rent was good, especially for when I was going to university, bartending, and then starting out my career. Why would I leave?” 

“Well… Why did you leave?”

“Privacy, honestly.”

“What, your apartment wasn’t private enough?” Jayce asks before taking another bite of his sandwich.

“No. I hated sharing walls with neighbours and some of them were nosy. This older woman lived next to me—had been living there since before I did—started getting nasty towards me when she noticed I had a lot of random men coming and going. Called me a whore, said my mom would be disappointed if she knew how ‘easy’ I was. She then accused me of doing sex work out of my apartment. Back when you could still get jail time for it. She even reported me to the super. I was mortified to have to explain that I was just a slut,” Viktor says lightheartedly but laughing awkwardly. He’s trying to brush it off, but it was one of the most embarrassing moments of his life.

“Holy shit, Vik… I’d count that as discrimination, honestly. Like, if you had women coming and going, I bet she wouldn’t have said shit. Probably just ‘boys will be boys’, y’know?” His companion frowns, setting his sandwich down on the paper wrapper it came in, reaching across the table to offer his hand. “I don’t think you’re a slut, by the way.”

“I definitely agree that it was discrimination.” He hesitates to take Jayce’s hand but does so, appreciating how warm and rough it is. Shrugging again, he says, “Honestly, I say that completely neutrally. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sleeping with a bunch of strangers. I was in my mid-twenties, I was finally getting confident enough to pick up guys regularly—I liked slutting around. It just wasn’t any of that old hag’s business.”

Jayce chuckles, nodding. “Yeah, I can relate. After my last relationship, I kinda just decided to keep things casual. I liked ‘slutting around’ too,” he makes a quotation mark with his free hand. “Is it weird? Being exclusive, I mean.” 

The question comes as a surprise and he considers it for a moment. “Yeah, it is weird. But… a good kind of weird. I’ve been able to do things I couldn’t do with just random strangers and, well… I mean, we’re friends, right? Companions, as you said. I’m getting more than sex out of this, which is more than I could ever get with a stranger.”

“So… you don’t regret not remaining strangers?” There’s a hopeful look in Jayce’s eyes as he squeezes Viktor’s hand.

“No. At first I did. I’m still a little annoyed every time you learn a little too much about me, like my last name. But, overall… no, I haven’t regretted it.”

“Good. I feel the same way.” The smile on Jayce’s handsome face makes Viktor want to kiss him stupid.

Viktor narrows his eyes at Jayce, pulling his hand away. “Stop that.” 

The smile falls and Jayce suddenly looks panicked. “Stop what? What’d I do?”

“Looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like I hung the fucking moon.”

“If you told me you did, I’d believe you. But why should I stop?”

“Because it’s making me want to climb in your lap and eat your face,” Viktor huffs with a subtle smirk, sipping his iced americano. 

Laughing and grinning at him brightly, Jayce responds with, “I’d happily let you devour me. You sure you wouldn’t be too full for your sandwich, though?”

Viktor snorts, shaking his head. “No, I’ve already made out with you in public enough today.”

“No such thing.”

They sit and chat for about an hour, sharing an infamous dark chocolate chip cookie, only because they’re almost the size of his face and they still have affogatos to eat. As predicted, Jayce names it the best chocolate chip cookie he’s ever had—even better than his mom’s, which he made Viktor swear he’d never tell. Like I’d ever meet his mother.

It’s about 2:30 pm when they finally leave the café and Jayce turns to Viktor to ask, “So, what now?”

Viktor scans the strip for another opportunity for entertainment and his eyes land on the perfect distraction. “Follow me.”

After crossing the street, Viktor guides Jayce by the hand to The Gate. There are no windows, just posters about new games and deals, and Jayce says, “Why does this place look so shady?”

“They don’t have any windows because everything inside is blacklit,” Viktor explains, opening up the door then dragging Jayce inside. In the darkness of The Gate, the retro-inspired decor is obvious, from the neon signs pointing to food stalls and mini golf, to the abstract coloured shape pattern carpet. The base colour of the floor, walls and ceiling are all black, with glow-in-the-dark constellations, planets and other decals. A maze of arcade games greet them on the main floor, littered with children, teens and adults alike. “I hope you like arcades.”

“I love arcades, and I fucking love mini golf.” 

“The mini golf is fantasy themed too. There’s a big dragon statue at the final hole.”

“Okay well we gotta go play now. How ‘bout we start there?”

“Sure,” Viktor agrees, still holding Jayce’s hand unconsciously. It’s keeping him grounded in the overstimulating surroundings as they start to walk towards the mini golf entrance. “I should warn you, though… I’m pretty good.”

Jayce gives him a devious grin. “Oh, really? I’m not too shabby. Wanna make a bet?”

“Maybe. What are we betting for? Either way, you’re going to lose,” he smirks in return.

Humming and glancing around the arcade for ideas, Jayce finally speaks when they get in line. “I got it. Loser has to play a game of the winner’s choosing. They have to play either for an hour, or until they win or reach an agreed score.” 

“Interesting… I think I know exactly what you’ll be playing,” Viktor says confidently before they reach the front of the line and he pays for the two of them. 

Needing to wait until the group before them finish the first hole, Jayce takes the opportunity to ask, “How’s your hoop game?”

He arches a brow. “Do I look even remotely sporty?”

“Well, I’m sure you’ll get good after you spend an hour shooting baskets,” Jayce grins.

“You wish. There’s a claw machine in your future,” Viktor grins back. The look of horror that crosses Jayce’s face is enough to make Viktor cackle. “I’m looking forward to watching you slowly go mad as you try fruitlessly to win a plushie from a rigged game.”

“You are diabolical.” There’s false fear in Jayce’s voice, clearly all for show because he’s trying to hide his laughter.

It takes them just short of an hour to do all ten holes under the blacklight, surrounded by murals of fairies, mystical mushrooms, and odd looking dryads. They would’ve been faster if Jayce had an easier time getting his ball in the hole. Plus, Jayce had the idea to stop to take selfies with the doofy wizard statue at hole six and the dragon at the final hole. Viktor won't admit that he’ll be admiring the picture of Jayce trying to seduce the wizard in the foreseeable future. 

“What’s your final score?” Jayce asks with a sigh when they hand back their golf balls and clubs. He already knows he’s been defeated because Viktor did, accidentally, get two hole-in-ones.

“Twenty-six. You?” Viktor smiles smugly with faux ignorance.

“... Forty.”

“Right. Let’s find that claw machine.”

Viktor finds the perfect machine. It’s large and filled with a variety of eight-inch Sanrio Squishmallows. He only chose it because it looks the most difficult, and judging by the nervous look on Jayce’s face, it’s a good choice. “Alright, I’ll start the timer.”

“This is a financial punishment too. I could easily spend a hundred in an hour,” Jayce sighs before cracking his knuckles and approaching the machine, as if he were a baseball player stepping up to the plate. “Which one you want?”

“Huh?” He blinks at Jayce.

“I’ll get whichever one you want. I’m not doing this for me, afterall.”

A bashful feeling overcomes him and he knows for a fact that his cheeks have turned pink. It’s straight out of a romance—the love interest works hard to win the lead a plushie at a local fair game, or in this case, an arcade claw machine as part of a punishment. He knows he should just say ‘whichever is easiest’ to be at least a little merciful, but he takes his time taking in the variety of cute characters encased in the machine. “That one,” Viktor decides, pointing to the back corner where an egg-shaped grumpy penguin with a spiky head and a pink hoodie is peeking out from behind a similar Hello Kitty. He’s unfamiliar with the character, but the tired, unimpressed expression sells him. 

“The penguin? Ha, he reminds me of you before 9 am,” Jayce grins at him.

It’s Viktor’s turn to look at Jayce with an expression that is nothing but unsympathetic. “Okay, for a second I was feeling bad for making you do this, but now I don’t.”

“Aw, c’mon Vik, I’m just teasin’,” the larger man replies before grabbing Viktor’s jaw with one hand to pull him in for an apologetic kiss. Viktor pretends he isn’t flustered by it, but his cheeks are burning by the time Jayce’s lips part from his own.

“O-Okay, okay, ready?” He stutters, brushing off the kiss and unlocking his phone to start the timer. 

“Ready,” Jayce says, pulling his debit card out of his wallet and holding it near the scanner.

“3… 2… 1… Go!” 

The next half hour is full of highs and lows as Jayce drains his bank account one dollar at a time for the sake of a disgruntled flightless bird. Some attempts are pathetic, as are the first handful, but Jayce stops approaching it with brute force and starts applying strategy. Three rounds are spent on getting Hello Kitty out of the way (while making an unsuccessful ‘might as well’ attempt at getting her to the exit), and then he spends another couple just nudging other plushies out of the way so he has a clear shot to the drop off. However, gripping the little guy is not easy, and actually going the distance is a challenge. 

While at this point Viktor would be mind-numbingly frustrated, Jayce keeps his cool. Sure, he’s dramatic when he fails, but he doesn’t show any signs of anger, no matter how disappointing or lackluster his attempts are. In fact, Jayce laughs more than anything.

He’s nothing like Táta. I can’t imagine asking the miserable bastard to get me a toy from a claw machine without getting berated for asking in the first place. If he was drunk, that is.

“It’s sweet how dedicated your boyfriend is,” Viktor hears a stranger say over his shoulder, disrupting his train of thought. Glancing over, he sees a young woman, maybe early twenties, with purple dyed hair and a messenger bag covered in a variety of nerdy and queer pins. “I’ve been watching his Herculean efforts for the last fifteen minutes.”

Ah, my people. A flush reaches his cheeks and he immediately tries to correct her. “Oh, uh, he’s—”

“Baby, I got it!” Jayce bursts out suddenly, drawing Viktor’s attention as he throws his fists in the air and lets out a whoop. Viktor looks down at his phone and pauses the timer. The fact that Jayce spent over thirty minutes of his day off to win a plushie of Viktor’s choice because he lost a bet makes a fondness grow in his chest—a fondness he doesn’t know what to do with.

Well, he called me ‘baby’ in public very loudly. No point denying it to a stranger and having to explain our very complicated and intimate arrangement that definitely isn’t a committed relationship. Looking back at the woman, he says with a subtle smile, “Yeah, he is. Sweet and dedicated.” 

“Sounds like a catch. Congrats on getting Badtz-Maru,” she replies playfully before joining a group of obviously queer people who are huddled around an intense match at a DDR machine blasting Everytime We Touch by Cascada. 

Jayce, somehow missing the entire conversation, turns to Viktor and presents him with the little plush penguin. “As promised. How’d I do?”

“34 minutes and 42 seconds. Not bad, Talis,” Viktor replies as he takes the plushie, noting how soft it is, with what can only be described as a proud smile. “I think you deserve a reward of your own.” 

“Oh yeah? What did you have in mind?” 

Tucking the plushie under his left arm holding his crutch, he reaches up and cups the nape of Jayce’s neck. Once he draws Jayce in, the other man picks up on where this is going and dips down to meet Viktor’s lips. Jayce’s large hands root themselves on his waist, holding him firmly, while his own hand tangles in his dark thick hair. Were they not in public, Viktor would drop his crutch and start climbing Jayce like a tree as if he were being chased by a bear. He settles for kissing Jayce like the moment is straight out of a John Hughes movie. 

It’s not quite heated, in fact, it reminds Viktor of the kiss they shared yesterday when Jayce had first told him about his father… but different. The same level of tenderness and vulnerability are there, but it’s more confident. While Viktor has full-on made out with Jayce in the back of an Uber, The Last Drop, the movie theatres and now an alley, in an arcade during the middle of the day is a little too much PDA in his opinion. That doesn’t stop him from continuing to kiss him for at least ten more seconds, though.

He’s breathless when he breaks away, a hint of a smile on his lips. Jayce looks just as euphoric, the cute gap in his teeth on display as he grins. “If all I have to do is win something out of a claw machine for you to kiss me like that, I would’ve done it much sooner.”

With slight confusion, Viktor asks, “Kiss you like what?” 

“Like I matter,” Jayce says quietly, not leaving Viktor’s orbit. His breath ghosts over Viktor’s lips and the dim expression on his face makes Viktor’s heart tremble in his ribcage, disturbed by the fact that Jayce would even need that reassurance.

“Of course you matter,” Viktor whispers back, the drone of children, music, and cartoony sales pitches from the machines simply fading into the background. His hand cradles Jayce’s cheek instead of his head, brushing his thumb over his beard. “You matter to me.” 

“You don’t know how much that means to me.” Gently, Jayce presses a kiss to his crown before pressing their foreheads together. The next words spoken are so quiet Viktor nearly misses them. “You don’t know how much you mean to me.”

He means as a friend… right? Viktor thinks as he stares into Jayce’s hazel eyes, the tension between them is thick with unspoken feelings that he’s too fearful to name. 

His brain immediately leaps to denial. 

This doesn’t mean anything. We’re just really good friends. My friends mean a lot to me. That’s all this is.

Despite the friendship theory his mind is weaving, he leans forward and places another soft kiss to Jayce’s lips. He doesn’t know what he means to convey, or what Jayce will read from it, but he does it however his gut tells him to—slow, deliberate and with an amount of tenderness Viktor didn’t even know he was capable of. It doesn’t last long before Viktor is pulling away, looking up at Jayce through his lashes, taking in the wonder evident in his eyes. “I believe you promised me gelato,” Viktor says playfully, breaking the magical little bubble they had been suspended in. 

“I did,” Jayce chuckles softly, standing up straight and retracting his hands. “Let’s get your new pal to the car first.” 

“Badtz-Maru.”

“Sorry?”

“His name is Badtz-Maru, apparently.”

“Well, let’s go buckle Badtz in.”

Twenty minutes later, they’re headed into the gelato shop, closer to the bridge. The ocean harbour breeze is more prevalent on the street while the smell of salt lingers in the air. It’s already after 4:30 pm and the Lanes are beginning to bustle even more with the impending evening. Viktor is so taken by how elated he is, from the beautiful weather to the simple pleasure of having decent company, that he doesn’t even register that they held hands all the way to the gelato shop. 

“Patio?” Jayce asks, picking up their order and nodding to the door. 

“Yeah, might as well enjoy the nice weather.”

They get settled in a table tucked under the shade of the gelato shop’s awning, which cools Viktor’s skin of any lingering perspiration. After quickly taking his lactose pill, Viktor picks up his own affogato and a small wooden spoon, eager to dig in. 

“Hold on, cheers?” Jayce prompts, lifting the little plastic cup with the melting ice cream. 

“Sure,” Viktor agrees, lifting his own. “What to?”

“To… a wonderful companionship?”

“I can cheers to that,” Viktor says before they tap their cups together. 

They proceed to eat and Jayce immediately makes a pleasant sound around a spoonful of black sesame gelato. “Oh shit, this is really good. I like it.”

“Yeah?” 

“Might be a new favourite,” Jayce says before glancing at his watch. “It’s almost five. The show doesn’t start until 7:30 but I booked our reservation for 6:45. What do you want to do until then?”

“Well… the Saturday market is open and it’s only two blocks away, closer to the pier. Would you want to do that?”

“What’s there?”

“It’s like an antiques, arts, crafts, food and farmer’s market all in one.”

“Yeah, I’m down. Sounds fun.” 

Two affogatos and two blocks later, again walking hand-in-hand, they’re greeted by the scent of barbecue and classic Zaunite food, plus the sound of a live musician playing a Queen cover. “Are you familiar with any of the vendors?” Jayce asks, noting all the local business logos hanging above the stalls.

“Yeah, a few… Oh, actually, I see one you might like.” Viktor pulls Jayce past a few art dealers, directly to The Crystal Cauldron’s booth. A black woman with blue locs and blue eyeliner is standing at the stall, and while they’re not entirely unfamiliar, Viktor needs to double-check her name. “Hey, Gert, right? Viktor—we met at Powder’s birthday party?”

The woman lights up and she nods with a lopsided grin. “Hey, yeah! Little Miss Pow’s boss man, right?”

“Something like that. My friend here is really into gems. Do you have any rare ones or… maybe ones that are helpful for stress and anxiety?” Viktor glances at Jayce, who has a smile as soft as cashmere on his lips, and he isn't sure what it’s for.

“What kinda stress we talkin’?”

“Work stress and general anxiety, some social,” Jayce replies, shrugging. “I have a couple rose quartz and amethysts sitting on my desk though.”

“What’s your star sign?” 

Blinking, Jayce replies with, “Cancer. Why?”

Huh. I wonder what Powder would have to say about that, Viktor thinks with amusement. His sister’s fixation on astrology has unfortunately left him with a little bit too much knowledge on the subject—knowledge he doesn’t entertain. Oh god… Jayce is absolutely a Cancer, is a thought that follows despite his reluctance to think on it. I don’t know if that’s good or ba—it doesn’t fucking matter, what am I thinking?

“Thought so, you gave me water vibes.”

“Are you thinking rubies or something? I thought that was more so for love and strength.”

“You’re on the right path but I’m talkin’ about a different stone associated with Cancer. Have you heard of carnelian?”

“I think… that’s an agate, right?”

“Yep,” Gert confirms as she digs through a box of wares. “I only have a couple of these left… Oh, no, wait, there’s only one. Well, this might be destiny, my friend.” Standing, she carries a small baggie containing a bracelet of perfectly round stones in pink, purple, blue and white designed in an alternating pattern. “This is my favourite stress-relieving jewelry I’ve made. Pink is carnelian, purple is lepidolite, blue is blue lace agate, and white is selenite. Every stone here is for promoting peace of body, mind and spirit. Also, fun fact, the pink carnelian is actually good for lovesickness too.”

“I love the colour of the lepidolite, the marbling is beautiful. I don’t think I’ve seen it before” Jayce says, leaning in to take in the bracelet closely. “What’s its meaning in particular?”

“Other than being said to help with anxiety, depression and sleep, it’s an intellectual stone. Improves focus, encourages analytical skills, and promotes internal changes like recognizing your own patterns and learning from them.”

What can’t it do? Is what Viktor wants to say, but he knows Jayce loves gemology and all the spirituality surrounding it. He doesn’t want to discourage him or make him feel foolish. Just because Viktor doesn’t believe in it, doesn’t mean people can’t enjoy it. He only argues with Powder about astrology because she’s constantly relating his behaviours to his birth chart.

“How much for it?”

“Eh… Since you’re a friend of a friend, I’ll give it to you for $55. I usually charge $70 for a piece like this since these are some rarer stones. It’s ethically sourced and all handmade—I even tumble and polish the stones myself,” she shrugs like that isn’t at all impressive.

“I appreciate the offer, but I insist on paying full price given all that,” Jayce replies, standing upright again. “I’ll take it.”

“Alright, I won’t complain about making a full sale,” Gert grins, patiently waiting for Jayce to pay. “Do you want a bag?”

“Nah, I’m gonna wear it. I will take your card, though, thanks,” Jayce nods his head, accepting the bracelet and a business card after he hands over the cash. Once it’s fastened on his right arm with the magnetic clasp, he turns his wrist over to inspect it in the light before locking eyes with Viktor’s. “See? You’re not an asshole.”

“I’m not an asshole because I saw a vendor you might like?” Viktor lets out a sound of amusement, clearly doubtful. 

“Yes. It was considerate and you don’t give yourself enough credit,” Jayce argues, snaking his arm around Viktor’s waist. Waving to the woman, he says, “Nice meeting you, Gert! I’m definitely gonna pay you a visit in the future.”

“Lookin’ forward to it, Piltie,” she teases with a smirk.

Jayce gapes at the woman and Viktor snorts. “How did she—”

“I told you it’s obvious, baby,” Viktor reminds him, not even registering the pet name. “Come on, I think I see tacky graphic t-shirts over there.”

Viktor loses track of time between giggling at Minions, Garfield, and odd tourist shirts, browsing homemade soaps and candles—a guilty pleasure they apparently share—and learning an unprecedented amount of information about rare Yu-Gi-Oh! cards from a chatty TCG vendor. Viktor was able to keep up, for the most part, but Jayce was utterly lost. 

“I’m telling you, when I collected Pokémon cards when I was ten, I had no idea how to play. I just wanted little pictures of my favourite Pokémon to take with me to school,” Jayce eventually says while they’re sitting near the pier, a short walk from the market. ”What’s your favourite Pokémon, by the way?”

“First generation?”

“Yeah.”

“This might not come as a surprise but… Ditto.”

“Oh, really, the shapeshifting, genderless purple blob appealed to you?” Jayce teases him. “Can you guess mine?”

Humming in thought, Viktor states, “Definitely a water-type… Nothing small and more aquatic-like than Blastoise…” Then, seconds later, “Either Gyarados or Lapras. I’m leaning towards Lapras because while Gyarados is cool, Lapras is both powerful and majestic. I feel like you value majesty over coolness.”

With his mouth agape, Jayce stares at him for a long moment. “Who the fuck are you, Sherlock Holmes? How’d you get that?”

“Mostly guessing but I figured the whale hyperfixation didn’t come from nowhere. Plus, I believe you said you’ve always loved seals and turtles when we were talking about favourite animals a few weeks ago. I’d say Lapras kind of resembles both, turtles more so, obviously.” 

“Wouldn’t Squirtle or Wartortle make more sense?”

“Like I said, had to be big. I bet you were also the kind of kid that wanted to ride a Pokémon.”

“What, and you didn’t?”

“Not saying that. I would default to an Arcanine for that, though.”

“Why Arcanine?”

“Reminds me of a tiger. I think tigers are cute.”

“Right, cats. Rio would make a good Persian. Halloween costume this year?”

“I could get her a haircut for it, which she’ll resent me for,” Viktor snorts.

“I can only imagine,” Jayce laughs before checking his watch. “Oh, shit, it’s already 6:30. We gotta get goin’.”

“Actually?” Viktor asks in disbelief. “I can’t believe we’ve been out for almost seven hours… I can’t even remember the last time I went out for a whole day.”

“Me neither, if I’m being honest. But, the Lanes is a pretty cool neighbourhood. There’s a lot to do. Plus… I’d say my handsome date is excellent company. Makes the time go by easily,” Jayce grins before standing and offering his hand. “Ready to get going?”

The words ‘handsome date’ make Viktor’s stomach flood with pesky butterflies and, yet again, he finds himself blushing in response. Rather than correct him by adding ‘fuck buddy’ in front of that second word, Viktor takes Jayce’s hand and allows him to pull him to his feet. “You’re not half bad yourself,” he replies as he tries not to show how much the simple statement affected him.

They make their reservation just in time and are seated in a quiet booth in the corner that still has a good view of the grand piano on stage. Viktor appreciates the private nature of their seat, but it looks like it’s going to be a full-house still based on the tables filling up quickly. Despite how busy it seems, the wait staff are punctual and they’re barely sitting a minute before a waiter comes by with the drink and food menus. 

“I assume you want wine?” Viktor asks as he glances at the drink menu, seeing an extensive wine list that he frankly has no understanding of. 

“Yeah—I assume you want some whiskey?”

“With dessert. I’ll have wine with dinner. Can you pick?”

“Yeah. Tell me what you want to eat and I’ll pick something out for you. I can also point out what would be good with a riesling—that’s your favourite, right?”

Viktor is frankly flattered that Jayce even remembered what specific kind of white wine he likes, and he’s relieved to have his options narrowed down. “I want a caesar salad to start but, yes, tell me what would go with a riesling.”

Jayce skims the menu, humming as he does. “Do you like lemon?”

“Yeah.”

“I think, considering your food limitations, the best option would be the garlic, lemon and parm shrimp linguine.”

“That… does sound like something I’d like.”

“I believe that would pair well with the Bollig-Lehnert riesling, which I’m actually familiar with. It’s sweeter, a little floral. If I remember correctly, it’s got grapefruit notes, which will compliment the lemon,” Jayce finishes explaining, looking up at Viktor curiously. “So, caesar, shrimp pasta, and a riesling? Does that sound good to you?”

Viktor stares at Jayce for a lengthy moment, completely taken aback. I… didn’t need to make a single choice. It’s like he read my mind before I could even consider it, he thinks to himself in disbelief. That’s actually… really nice. A relief. Is this what having a boyfriend is like? Because maybe I could really use one. I mean, not actually… right? “How did you figure out what I would want in less than a minute?”

“I just know you really well by now. Hell, we’ve known each other… seven months and two weeks?”

“Wait, you know exactly how long we’ve known each other?”

“Uh… yeah. We met on September 27th.”

“So 224 days.”

“Well, I couldn’t do that math off the top of my head but I trust your calculations, so yes.”

“I suppose you could learn many of my preferences in over two hundred days…”

Jayce chuckles. “Yeah, and I’m sure you could guess what I’m gonna go for.”

Viktor arches a brow. “Is that a challenge?” 

“Not necessarily, but it can be,” Jayce grins as he leans back in his seat, crossing one leg over the other. “You guessed my favourite Pokémon, this should be child’s play.”

“Alright,” he agrees, looking down at the menu. Carefully looking through the dishes, he begins to say his thought process out loud. “You love a merlot and, following your silly wine rules, beef or tomato-based pastas are your go-to… You’re getting the filet mignon with bearnaise sauce.” 

“Bravo, Mr. Cermak,” Jayce claps, though not loud enough to be heard over the drone of other patrons. “You could probably con people into thinking you’re a psychic. Like that one show, Psych? You’re basically that guy.”

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head. “You did it just as easily. I guess two hundred days is plenty of time to get to know someone.”

When their waiter comes to take their order, Viktor doesn’t even need to say a word. Jayce recites both their orders, not forgetting a single detail, and even asking for extra croutons for Viktor’s salad. I didn’t even think to get extra croutons for my salad. I mean, yeah, I always want extra croutons…

“Since when do you know I like getting extra croutons?” Viktor asks, blinking at Jayce.

“Uh, lucky guess. You like bread and you like crunchy things, so I figured,” Jayce shrugs.

“That was a lucky guess?” 

With a shark-like grin, Jayce replies, “Yep. I bet I could guess your dessert order too.”

Viktor scoffs, shaking his head. “I’m not making a bet with you that I know I’m going to lose.”

Dinner is delicious. Viktor can’t remember the last time he had a meal that good, and he does actually appreciate Jayce’s choice of wine for him. By the time they’re almost done, the show begins. Three human men in navy suits come out on stage and go to their instruments: a grand piano, double bass and an alto saxophone. They begin to play and a woman’s deep, smoky voice begins to sing off-stage. Eventually, a vastaya woman with fox-like features, strawberry blonde pointed ears, and a glittering arctic blue dress walks on stage, and the entire audience becomes enraptured, including Viktor. 

When the fourth or fifth song ends, Viktor looks over to Jayce and can’t help but admire the way the dim light illuminates his face, casting shadows of his long lashes on his cheek bones. He isn’t looking at Viktor at the moment, clapping along with the crowd for the performer, and Viktor claps to be polite, but all he can look at is Jayce—Jayce Talis. Jayce, who he loves to see with his relaxed hair, bangs just barely brushing over his forehead. Jayce, who has gifted him one of the best days in recent memory. Jayce, who he desires carnally at this moment, which has been building up over the last eight hours.

Viktor suddenly remembers their kink conversation and that Jayce’s biggest fantasy is public sex. That was evident during the spontaneous blowjob in the McDonald’s parking lot last month. Jayce looked like his mind was being blown and that Viktor was sucking his soul out through his dick.

They’re in public. And there’s a bathroom. 

Deviously, Viktor slips one of his loafers off under the table and reaches over to brush his foot against the inside of Jayce’s calf. The man startles slightly, looking over at Viktor with sultry eyes. “You wanna get out of here already?”

“No, I was thinking you help me to the bathroom,” Viktor replies, biting back a coy smile, hoping Jayce will get the hint. To punctuate his point, he lifts his foot further up the inside of Jayce’s leg, reaching his knee. 

“Oh, you—?” Jayce stops, seeming to understand where Viktor is going with this and he suddenly looks alert. Leaning over the table, he whispers despite the fact that the music can easily drown out his voice, “Here? Right now?”

“The bathrooms are singles. No one will walk in,” Viktor says cheekily, trying to seduce Jayce with his best bedroom eyes into committing a crime for the second time. The more or less legality compared to the parking lot BJ is debatable. 

It is his fantasy in the first place, so I doubt he’ll say no. But I did like it myself.

Jayce licks his lips, his hazels clearly fixated on Viktor’s mouth. “I can think of no other protests.” 

“Good.” Giving him a satisfied smirk, Viktor brushes his toes over Jayce’s clothed bulge, earning a quiet gasp. The contact is brief before he slips his loafer back on and grabs his crutch. “Let me hold on to your arm so it’s not suspicious why you’re coming with me.”

“Yes, sir,” Jayce says, his spine straight and at full attention as he stands and offers his arm to Viktor. For once, Viktor plays up the disability—it’s actually a good day and his hip isn’t bothering him as much, but he pretends to struggle so nobody pays any mind to Jayce escorting him towards the bathrooms.

Once they’re in the hallway behind the bar where half a dozen restrooms are, Viktor stands up straight and nods to the one at the end. “Less likely for anyone to overhear. And it’s accessible.”

“What exactly do you have planned?”

“You’ll just have to wait and find out,” Viktor says slyly, letting go of Jayce’s arm to turn on the light of the small bathroom. A warm yellow glow from the sconces illuminates their surroundings and reveals the minimalist bathroom. It clearly went under renovations like the rest of the lounge, simple but classy art-deco style in black and green all throughout. There’s a toilet (with a lid, thankfully), a freestanding sink, a fake plant for added atmosphere, and not much else.

Viktor walks over to the toilet and sits on top of the seat while Jayce shuts and locks the door. Setting his crutch against the handlebar mounted to the wall, Viktor curls a finger to Jayce, beckoning him closer.

“Is this going to be a regular thing?” Jayce asks as he approaches, standing in front of Viktor.

“Maybe. I didn’t hear any complaints when I blew you in your car,” Viktor states, pleased that he’s at eye-level with Jayce’s groin. His lithe fingers find Jayce’s belt buckle and begin to unfasten it, keeping his eyes casted upward towards the other man’s. “I figured this was the next logical place to explore.”

“Take advantage of, more like. Are you planning on bending over or—?” 

“No, I’m going to blow you again. It’s just easier. And don’t worry about me, I can take care of myself,” Viktor teases with a wink, slowly unzipping Jayce’s fly.

“Puta madre, serás mi muerte,” Jayce whispers, letting out a shuddering breath. When Viktor reaches into his underwear, he’s flattered that Jayce is already getting hard from so little. He can’t help but feel proud that he can do this to a man like Jayce, a man who very well has everything and could have anyone, yet he chooses Viktor… for now.

Stroking him languidly, Viktor keeps his eyes on Jayce’s face, chewing on his lip with anticipation. Ever since he gave Jayce his first unprotected blowjob, he’s been addicted. The salt and warmth of his bare skin calls to him like a sailor yearns the sea—once he got a taste, he could never go back. Halting his hand at the head to thumb the slit, Viktor places hot, open-mouthed kisses to the base, savouring him eagerly. 

Jayce gasps softly before asking, “Can I pull on your hair?” 

“You know you can,” Viktor raises a brow at him before dragging the flat of his tongue along the underside, feeling the prominent vein against the muscle. 

“Thought—Thought I’d still ask.” Immediately, Jayce’s broad hand cards through the front of his hair then takes hold of the roots. He doesn’t tug, not yet at least, and simply holds him firmly while Viktor reaches the head and takes it into his mouth. Suckling gently, he draws out a moan from Jayce, who snaps his free hand over his mouth. “Mierda, eres tan bueno conmigo…”

Jayce babbling in Spanish is one of Viktor’s favourite sounds. He never knows what is said, but it doesn’t matter, Viktor examines his tone instead. Sometimes they’re sweet nothings, sometimes they’re words of worship, but right now, it’s pure unadulterated bliss. Stroking his length while Viktor twists his tongue around the tip, he begins to get the bitter taste of Jayce’s precum, and that prompts arousal to flare between his legs. With his free hand, he starts to unbutton his own pants, multitasking like an expert while he gradually sinks down on Jayce’s length.

“God, baby… you’re so good with your mouth,” Jayce whispers zealously, gently pushing Viktor’s head further down his length. “You take me so well…”

The praise is appreciated and only adds to his arousal, feeling relief when he finally tucks his hand inside his underwear and brushes over his stiffening cock. Knowing it won’t be pleasurable dry, his fingers dexterously sink inside his own cunt, feeling how wet he is already. A whine passes his lips, stretched around Jayce’s cock to the point where his relaxed jaw is aching already, but the discomfort only makes him more needy to touch himself.

“I’d love to eat you out… kneel on this hard tile floor and devour you until you’re trembling. Would you like that?” Getting bolder, Jayce begins to pull Viktor’s head back, then forward again, getting him to bob shallowly. Viktor makes a small mhm sound around Jayce’s cock, retracting his digits from inside himself in favour of rubbing his bundle of nerves with the pads of his index and middle fingers. “If you let me come inside your mouth, I’ll do just that. If you can last that long, that is…”

Jayce didn’t even need to bargain, Viktor was going to swallow every drop no matter what, but he’s desperate to last long enough to get Jayce’s mouth on his pussy. So, he slows his fingers, rubbing just enough to scratch the itch but not enough to build towards an orgasm just yet. So far, Jayce has been guiding the movement of his head up and down his length, but Viktor decides to push himself further. 

Bowing his head, he takes most of Jayce’s cock, removing his hand from his length to embrace him with his mouth instead. His tongue cradles the underside, feeling Jayce’s pulse, and he doesn’t stop going down until his nose is buried in the bed of wiry, dark hair. His breath comes out in ragged puffs through his nostrils, though his breath is being cut off by Jayce’s cock curving down his throat. It nearly makes him gag, but he’s well practiced and long since trained away the reflex. 

Above him, Jayce moans shamelessly as he bites his knuckle, clearly trying to keep quiet. The fact that Viktor can do this to him and bring him to the point where he literally has to bite down to hold back his sounds of pleasure makes pride swell in his chest cavity. Right now, I’m the only one who can do this to him. It’s a privilege I won’t take for granted.

“Can I… Can I fuck your face?” Jayce asks the question hesitantly, as if he hasn’t already and Viktor isn’t more than willing. Nodding and making another hum of confirmation, Viktor relaxes his mouth and jaw entirely, allowing Jayce to take the reins. Holding the back of Viktor’s head with one hand and bracing himself on the wall with the other, Jayce begins to piston his hips. 

In Viktor’s thirty-two years, he probably hasn’t felt this utterly debauched before. When he woke up this morning, he didn’t think he would have his hand down his pants while he gets his face fucked in a lounge bathroom hours later. It’s exhilarating, even though they’re unlikely to get caught thanks to the privacy of the bathrooms. And something about touching himself while Jayce uses him like a cocksleeve is making him dizzy with arousal.

“Fuck, baby, you’re so, so good to me,” Jayce whispers, looking down at him with wild eyes, seemingly even more ravenous than the first time they had sex in public. Viktor keeps his eyes on Jayce’s, despite the tears stinging them. Drool dribbles down his chin and drips onto the hand still playing with himself, which only makes him whimper from how painfully on edge he is. He’s desperate to get Jayce’s mouth on him, and for him to come down his throat, pushing through the ache in his jaw as the tears finally trickle down his cheeks.

Jayce seems to forget that they’re not in private because he makes the most primal, loud groan Viktor has gotten out of him before. His warm, bitter seed spills down Viktor’s throat without warning and he chokes, coughing around Jayce’s length. That seems to startle Jayce because he jumps and retracts his hips, pulling out of Viktor’s mouth entirely. “Shit, are you okay? I’m sorry, it just—”

“I’m fine,” Viktor rasps, cum and saliva coating his lips. “Can you—?”

“Paper towel,” Jayce immediately picks up without Viktor needing to finish his sentence. Swiftly, Jayce reaches for the paper towel dispenser and tears a couple pieces out. Rather than handing it to Viktor, Jayce tips his head up with one hand and begins to wipe up the mess himself.

Viktor has long since stopped touching himself out of fear he might come before he has the pleasure of Jayce’s face between his thighs again, but his arousal is physically painful now. His cock tingles even at the tender affection, prompting him to let out a pitiful cry as he rolls his hips into nothing. “Jayce…”

“I got you, baby,” Jayce soothes before getting on his knees and yanking Viktor’s pants and underwear to his ankles. He makes no hesitation, diving between Viktor’s legs to caress his cock with his tongue. Electricity shoots up Viktor’s spine, like a powerline breaking in a shower of lethal sparks, the pleasure so intense that it still hurts. Viktor spreads his legs as much as he can, tilting his hips upward to give Jayce easier access, and moans shamelessly.

The wet sounds coming from the marriage between Jayce’s mouth and Viktor’s cunt are filthy, echoing off the green tile walls while Viktor tries to silence his sobs with one hand. When he comes from barely any stimulation, his entire body shakes with pleasure while he hunches over Jayce’s head and holds onto his hair. Tears fall on Jayce’s nape as Viktor cries into his hand from the intensity of his orgasm. 

Pulling away and licking his lips, Jayce coos in his ear. “You did so good, baby.” Kisses are pressed to his temple and cheek before Jayce moves Viktor’s hand to capture his lips and kiss him there too. It’s sweet, and Viktor can’t help but sink into a dreamy haze of post-orgasmic bliss. 

Viktor buries his hands in Jayce’s hair, tilting his head to deepen the kiss, needy for his touch. He didn’t used to be like this. In the past, with one night stands, he would just tell them to stop touching him and to get the fuck out. But ever since they started cuddling as a regular occurrence, Viktor has latched on to every ounce of affection Jayce is willing to give him—which is actually a lot. 

Jayce gives me more than I deserve, certainly. Jayce still kisses him like he does, a soft embrace of chapped lips and calloused palms cradling his face. I hope the person I do eventually allow myself to fall in love with—if I do—is as fun and affectionate as Jayce, he thinks before gradually pulling away from the kiss. “We’re missing the show.”

“Worth it,” Jayce grins up at Viktor, brushing a lock of hair out of his face and tucking it behind his ear. “Do you need anything? Help cleaning up, or…?”

“I need a minute, my body is still tingling,” Viktor huffs out a laugh.

Two minutes later, they’re both decent and cleaned up, and begin to return to their table. When Jayce opens the door, there’s a man on the other side wearing a suit and a name tag that says ‘manager’. The man clears his throat and says, “I’m here to escort you out of the lounge.”

“Uh, it’s not—” Jayce stammers, but Viktor swiftly saves the situation by holding tightly to Jayce’s arm and pretending to shake.

“Sakra, it’s not what it looks like! My husband is my caregiver and he was helping me to the bathroom,” Viktor snaps at the man, nodding down to his crutch. “I’ve been coming to the Emerald Lounge for years and I get this treatment? You think I’m some kind of pervert just because I’m disabled?”

Jayce looks frozen for a brief moment before he turns to the manager as well, his brows pinched together in anger, playing along to Viktor’s delight. “Yeah, how would you feel if you needed help going to the bathroom and then you got accused of a crime!? Is this because we’re gay?”

“Well, um… no, another patron reported… moans,” the man says, red faced and hesitant.

“Can’t a man take a shit in peace!?” Viktor barks and he has to try very hard not to laugh. “I was told the salad had lactose free cheese so I had to go be violently ill! Pokud si to koupíte, jste zasraný debil!”

Cursing him out in Czech seems to have added to the intimidation factor, which Viktor is pleased with. “I—I, uh, I’m so sorry, sir. I will see your salad is compen—”

“The salad?” Jayce jumps in, raising his voice. “You made my husband sick with your negligence and then accused us of public indecency—unbelievable! All that and you’re comping a salad!?”

“I—My apologies, sirs. Your entire meal will be compensated, please, go ahead and enjoy the rest of the performance,” the man says in a rush, the sweat on his forehead glistening in the dim lighting. 

“Come on, my love, let’s try to enjoy the rest of our anniversary even though I’ve been publicly humiliated,” Viktor bites, turning on his heel, though he tries to remain feeble-looking to make the man squirm a little more. Jayce follows but quickly takes the lead so it looks more like Viktor is needing Jayce’s support. Once they’re out of earshot, Viktor tries his best to keep his incessant giggles quiet. “I can’t—I can’t believe that worked.”

“You’re fucking brilliant, y’know?” Jayce has to stifle his own laughter until they reach their booth in the back corner. “God, I can’t believe we got caught. How did you think to talk us out of that?”

“When you have a disability, you’ve got to use it to your advantage whenever you can. The best parking space is great but manipulating people to talk yourself out of a crime is a perk too,” Viktor grins. 

“The anniversary line was a nice touch. What did you yell in Czech, by the way?”

“‘If you buy this, you’re a fucking moron’,” Viktor snorts. “Nice move with the compensation. This place is way overpriced, even though I like it.”

“Hey, take every advantage, right?”

They continue to enjoy the performance and, the entire time, Viktor is still feeling high from the adrenaline. As predicted, Jayce gets Viktor’s preferred dessert correct—a slice of s’mores pie. Admittedly, he’s had the pie before, but Jayce had successfully picked out his favourite on a menu of eight items. Viktor can’t help but think it’s eerie how well Jayce can see into his psyche. 

He is more than satisfied after sharing the dessert with Jayce. It’s a silky chocolate filling with a toasted marshmallow fluff topping, all encased in a graham cracker crust, which Viktor then washed down with a glass of Glenfiddich 21. Jayce is still driving them back to Viktor’s place so he stuck with just one glass of wine and a sip of Viktor’s whiskey to taste it. I wonder if I had any dates like this, when I had tried to date, if I would have actually had a relationship by now, is what he thinks while they watch the rest of the show and he finishes his drink.

It’s nine when the performance ends and, lucky them, they don’t have to pay a dime for the meal, only their drinks. However, unlucky for them, it’s pouring rain when they look out the lounge’s front doors. “Sakra, I didn’t even check the weather before we left,” Viktor frowns to himself. It’s unlike him, but he was just so caught up in the spontaneity of their date that he didn’t bother to look.

“Sakra is right,” Jayce says as he steps outside, sheltered by the large marquee sign looming above the entrance. Viktor follows behind, feeling a chill from the breeze coming off the water as gooseflesh blooms on his skin. “How many blocks are we from my car?” 

“About ten. Four blocks south on Carter, five and and a half west on Janna. No matter what we do, we’re going to get soaked.”

“Not we, me. You stay here, I’ll go get the car.” 

Shaking his head and blinking in disbelief, Viktor argues, “What? No way. You’re not going to be a martyr.” 

“You’re my passenger prince, I’m not letting you get wet,” Jayce chuckles. “Look, I can sprint there, no problem. This will be faster. No offense, but I know you won’t be able to keep up without hurting yourself.”

Sighing with exasperation, Viktor’s shoulders slump. “You’re right. I can recognize my hard limits when I see them.”

“Hey, it’s not a big deal. Your place isn’t far and I can just warm up in your bed,” the larger man grins, raising his brows suggestively before leaning in to whisper in his ear. “I’ve got a little surprise for you too.”

“A surprise?” His reply is quiet, gazing curiously at Jayce with a coy smile. “Is it one I’m going to like?”

“I think you will take some pleasure in it, yes,” Jayce smirks before taking Viktor’s chin in his hand and tilting his head up. “I’ll be right back, your highness. You just stay here and be pretty, ‘kay?”

“Okay,” Viktor agrees before Jayce leans in and presses a sweet goodbye—or, more accurately, a ‘see you soon’—kiss on his lips. It’s brief but it still makes Viktor’s heart stutter, followed by a race to launch itself from his chest when he sees the loveliest smile on Jayce’s face. Speaking again, he pretends not to be breathless. “Be safe.”

“I will.” Pressing one more kiss to the mole on his cheek, Jayce then starts sprinting through the downpour. It shocks Viktor just how fast Jayce can go while wearing slacks and dress shoes, but the other man is out of sight within a minute. 

Viktor isn’t waiting long. It’s maybe eight minutes later, at most, when Jayce’s Volkswagen pulls up to the lounge. Crossing the short distance between the overhanging marquee and the passenger door, Viktor gets a little wet. However, when he sees Jayce, who looks like a drowned cat, he can’t help but laugh and speak with his gut. “God, baby… you look like you jumped into the harbour.”

Jayce’s hair is clinging to his forehead and neck, rivulets of water travelling from the crown of his head down to his lips. His glasses are smeared with rain water, clearly having made a weak attempt to wipe them off with his wet clothes. While it’s comical, Viktor also gets a nice peek at the defined muscle beneath the cotton now clinging to his torso. “I feel like I jumped in the harbour,” Jayce chuckles easily.

I like that he can laugh at himself, Viktor thinks, grinning softly at Jayce. “Here, let me,” he says before reaching up and taking Jayce’s glasses off of him. He does his best to wipe them dry on his shirt, which is more or less untouched by the rain, before gently placing them back on Jayce’s face. “Better?”

“Much, thank you. You ready to head home?”

Head home. Home. The word pulses in his skull and their conversation from their last date resurfaces. I still can’t believe I entertained a hypothetical about us living together. I want that house, though. And Jayce would make a nice… housemate. “Yeah, I’m ready,” he nods before buckling in.

Ten minutes later they’re speed walking to Viktor’s front door. He’s relieved when they get inside because while the day was fun, he’s so glad to be in his own, perfectly controlled environment that is his home. No overstimulating crowds, lights, or noises—the only noise that can be heard is Rio’s pitiful cries. “Ano, prdelička. Přinesu ti večeři,” he greets his baby, slipping off his shoes as he turns to Jayce. “You dry off, I’m going to feed my displeased child.”

“She is a little dramatic, isn’t she?” Jayce chuckles while he takes off his shoes and nods. “Think you can stay out of the bedroom for a few minutes?”

“Does this have to do with your supposed surprise?” Rio continues to cry at Viktor’s feet so he picks her up, holds her like a baby and kisses her cheek repeatedly. “Ach mé ubohé, hladovějící dítě. Svět je k tobě tak krutý!” He mocks her playfully, earning a laugh from Jayce.

“I can tell you’re making fun of her but I just want you to know that you’re exceptionally hot when you speak Czech.”

“Thank you. I’m feeding into her drama, by the way. Oh, woe is Rio, and all that.” 

Chuckling, Jayce replies. “To answer your question, yes. So give me like… five minutes? Maybe more like ten. I’ll come get you.”

“Alright. Take your time,” Viktor says before setting Rio down again and heading to the kitchen. “Come on, Ri, let’s get you some dinner.”

Ten minutes later, when Rio has already eaten every last morsel of her salmon pate, Jayce comes out of Viktor’s bedroom dressed in nothing but a pair of sweatpants. His hair is still damp but at least not sticking to his skin now. “Can I carry you?” 

Viktor shrugs, standing from the couch without his crutch where he had been waiting. “Sure.” 

Wasting no time, Jayce scoops him up in one sweeping motion, and Viktor instinctively holds on to his neck while being carried bridal-style. “Now, I want to preface that there’s no pressure. If you don’t want to, we don’t have to.”

“If I said yes to it during our kink talk, I’m willing to bet I’m down.”

“It was a relatively enthusiastic yes, I would say,” Jayce says as he steps inside Viktor’s bedroom. 

Looking around, Viktor tries to spot the surprise by scanning the bed, which isn’t hard to find. Knotted to the centre post of his headboard is soft-looking black rope, at least a few feet long, with an interesting knot that looks just like cuffs. “Is the surprise that I’m being tied up?” Viktor grins at Jayce excitedly because it’s been so long since he’s trusted anyone to bind him.

“Yeah. Judging by your reaction, that’s another yes?” Jayce smiles back. “I’ve got a blindfold too, if you’re interested?”

“Mm… not this time. I want to see you,” Viktor says quietly, admittedly batting his eyelashes at Jayce in an attempt to entice him further. It’s clearly unnecessary because Jayce momentarily crosses the threshold between them and kisses Viktor firmly. 

Jayce kisses him for only a minute before he sits Viktor down on the bed, crouching to reach for Viktor’s belt. “Let’s get you out of this, even though you look hot as hell in it.”

“I promise I’m hotter naked,” he snorts, helping by untucking his shirt and pulling it off. Immediately he quickly undoes his back brace and blindly tosses it towards his desk chair.

“That’s factually true,” Jayce says playfully before easing Viktor on his back to yank his pants off in one smooth motion. He kneels to undo Viktor’s leg brace and, by now, he enjoys letting Jayce undress him. At first, he was indifferent to how he and his bed partners got naked, he was always so focused on the goal and not the method. But now… it’s nice, to be unwrapped carefully, just like he does with a present.

“I’ve been practicing, by the way. Turns out, my rusty knowledge of sailors knots made learning a handcuff knot pretty easy.” 

“It is incredibly sexy that you studied for this and you didn’t just wing it and give me rope burn. What’s the material, by the way?”

“Standard nylon. I got it at a sex shop, not a Home Depot,” Jayce chuckles as he manhandles Viktor until he’s lying straight on the bed. “Are you alright with having your arms above your head?”

“Yeah, just give me a little bit of wiggle room.”

“You got it, baby.” Calloused hands carefully wrap the rope around Viktor’s wrists, making sure the knot is secure but not biting into his skin. As promised, Viktor has enough slack that he can bend his arms until his bound hands are in front of his face, but no further. “That good? Want me to adjust anything?”

“No, that’s perfect,” Viktor replies, relaxing his arms above him and biting back a grin of excitement.

“Do you want to know what I have planned for you, or do you want it to be a surprise?”

“I don’t like most surprises, so at least some sort of idea would be nice.”

“Well,” Jayce starts mysteriously, reaching for Viktor’s nightstand and opening the top drawer. Pulling out his wand vibrator, Jayce waves it playfully. “I was going to see how many times I could get you to come with this before you finally beg me to fuck you.”

Viktor’s mouth falls open. He signed up for bondage, not begging, but his pussy is wet just thinking about how humiliating it will be. Oh fuck, do I have a humiliation kink? How… humiliating. Swallowing thickly, he asks, “What tells you I wouldn’t just give in immediately?”

“Well, I believe someone confessed to being stubborn, and I know how much you hate asking for things. Plus, you love a challenge,” Jayce grins wickedly, climbing between Viktor’s legs before he clicks on the vibrator, leaving it on the lowest, most basic setting. “I’m betting it’ll take two before you cave. Three, if you’re brave enough.” 

“Brave enough?” Viktor balks at Jayce then narrows his eyes. “You’re goading me, aren’t you?”

“I like to call it teasing, but you got me. I figured if I show little faith, you’d fight harder to last longer. But, I’m pretty confident in your stubbornness. Think of this as an… experiment to see just how stubborn you are. For science.”

Well, I’m nothing if not a man of science, he wants to say, but he has enough wits about him still to not give away what discipline he works in. “I regret letting you get to know me.” Even though it’s awfully nice and convenient now that you can read my mind and even decide my meals for me. Probably my favourite perk about this pretending-he’s-my-boyfriend thing.

“No, you don’t,” Jayce grins, leaning down to kiss Viktor teasingly, all while brushing the wand against his inner thigh. 

He’s immediately responsive, inhaling softly from Jayce’s mouth as the vibrations make his skin hum. Dipping his tongue in Viktor’s awaiting cavern, Jayce draws a moan out of him as the vibrator moves higher. It’s still on his thigh but he can feel it ripple through his skin and it drives his cock to tingle in anticipation. Rolling his hips, Viktor tries to get closer to the source, because he’s frankly impatient and greedy, just barely brushing against the vibrating head. 

Immediately pulling away himself and the vibrator, Jayce looks down at him with a scolding gaze and shakes his head. “Ah-ah… I’m controlling this. I know how much you like being in control, but let me take the reins,” he says in a soothing voice while running a rough palm over Viktor’s stomach. The subtle wave of anxiety in Viktor’s insides, that he wasn’t even aware of before this moment, quell with Jayce’s touch. “I promise, I’ll take care of you.”

Viktor’s mouth is dry when he stares up at Jayce. He’s not stupid, nor is he unfamiliar with kink, and he can easily put the equation together. At this moment, Viktor realizes he’s just become the posterboy of daddy issues. Apparently, if a man I suspected to be a dilf at first ties me up and says he’s going to take care of me, I’m more than ready to call him Daddy. Maybe I should have thought about this more during our kink talk… Jayce said he was into the idea of Dom/sub dynamics, too…

“Do you trust me?” Jayce prompts him, tearing him from his thoughts. 

“That depends…” Viktor chews on his bottom lip, his face feeling hot from embarrassment. 

Clicking the vibrator off, Jayce frowns slightly. “Depends on what?” 

“Promise you won’t judge?”

“Of course not. I thought we cleared everything up with our kink talk, though?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t… um… I didn’t realize until just now.” 

“Realize what, baby?” Jayce’s hand caresses from his stomach to his side, brushing his thumb over a rib. “You can tell me anything, I’m not gonna judge you.”

“Would it… Would it be okay if I… um… called you…” Viktor struggles to say it before biting down on his bottom lip in an attempt to stifle his embarrassment.

Kisses are placed on his cheekbone as Jayce continues to pet his ribcage, and he coos, “It’s okay, angel, you can tell me.”

Angel…? I think I just felt myself getting weak in the knees mentally. He shifts in his rope cuffs, straining ever so slightly against the knot, feeling his bottom lip bruise from how hard he’s latched onto it. Quietly, barely above a whisper, he finally says, “... Daddy?”

Slowly, Jayce blinks at him before a gentle smile lifts his cheeks. “Yeah? You want to call me Daddy? Is it because I said I’ll take care of you?” 

His voice isn’t mocking at all, just entirely honest, which eases Viktor’s nerves. The blush on his cheeks is still furious despite that. “Maybe…” 

“I’d like it if you called me that,” Jayce says sweetly, kissing his cheek again before following the curve of his jaw down to his neck. Between kisses, Jayce rumbles, “I told you I like caring for people… Being needed… It makes me feel good. So, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“I just… I haven’t even trusted anyone in a long time to tie me up, let alone engage in a dynamic with…”

“We can take it slow and explore,” the other man reassures, kissing his breastbone. “You good to use the light system again?”

“Yeah.” 

“Are you good to keep going?” 

“Yeah…” Viktor trails off, watching Jayce press another kiss to his rib while he chews on his bottom lip again. “Thank you.”

Tilting his head as he sits up, Jayce asks, “What for?”

“Being so… open and encouraging. I would be mortified to ask… well, anyone else to do this,” he confesses.

“Hey, if there’s anything you want to explore that doesn't cross any hard boundaries, I’m happy to try.” Clicking the vibrator back on, he grins. “I have a feeling we’re both going to like this, though.”

Viktor’s anxiety practically melts away at the sight of Jayce’s smile, returning it softly. “Me too,” he replies, eying the buzzing toy. “Are you planning on edging me?”

“Oh, absolutely, it’ll be a key method of getting you to beg,” Jayce grins wickedly.

Swallowing a lump in his throat of anticipation, Viktor nods. “I’m ready.”

Viktor quickly realizes he didn’t prepare himself nearly enough. His thighs are teased with the vibrator for far too long, trembling slightly from being wound up so tightly, before he’s whining, “Jayce, please just put it where I need it already…”

“I don’t respond to Jayce right now,” he says firmly, his hazel eyes smoldering in the moonlight.

His mouth feels dry again as two syllables dangle on his tongue, begging to be released just as he’s ready to beg for Jayce to touch him. “Daddy, please…” He utters the words meekly, with a little bit of uncertainty behind it, but a warm feeling fills his chest cavity despite the discomfort. 

“Please what? Use your words, baby.” Jayce knows very well what he wants, as he teases Viktor’s skin again, barely an inch from his cunt. The wicked smirk on his lips triggers a shiver to crawl up each knob of his spine, and he’s embarrassed by how much he wants to dissolve into a puddle of pleads and cries from so little.

But he’s stubborn, so he won’t give in so easily. “I want… I want it on my cock.” 

“Like this?” Jayce asks with a sly smirk, brushing the vibrating head over Viktor’s underwear, his cock just barely receiving stimulation. 

Whimpering and jerking his hips, Viktor whispers, “Don’t tease me, Daddy… You wanted to see how many times I could come, right?”

“That’s true, but I also want to take my time. We could speed things up if you beg, though.”

Viktor pouts, a flush spreading all the way from his chest to his cheeks, giving in just a little. “Please Daddy, get my underwear out of the way at least…”

“See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Jayce smiles softly, not even putting down the wand as he yanks Viktor’s underwear off and blindly tosses it to the floor. 

Viktor’s swollen cock is barely peeking out from beneath the hood of his cunt, aching for friction. Jayce answers his desire by suddenly increasing the speed of the vibrator and applying expert flicks of his wrist, the head barely brushing the underside with the intense vibration. A strangled gasp leaves his lungs on first contact, yanking his restraints taut in an instinctive attempt to cover his mouth and silence the mortifying whines that follow with each point of contact. 

When Jayce stops applying brief flicks of the wand, he instead presses it against Viktor’s cock, mercilessly letting the vibration strike him to his very core. “Daddy…” Viktor whimpers tearfully, already feeling overstimulated from so little. 

Leaning down, Jayce presses the vibrator firmly against his cock, turning up the speed again as he nips Viktor’s earlobe. In a deep, husky voice that says he’s just as worked up, Jayce whispers, “Tell Daddy what you want, angel.” 

Viktor’s stomach is tied in a tighter knot than his cuffs, with no quick release in sight. The new territory of being dominated and even called angel, paired with the vibrator pulling him closer and closer to the edge of euphoria, has left his brain fried. He can barely form words or coherent thought and it takes him a few attempts to even speak. “I… I want to come.”

Suddenly, the pattern changes, and rather than a steady stream of stimulation it’s replaced with a short burst, a pause, another short burst, another pause, then a drawn out vibration. The moans that leave him are choked and in time with the sudden bursts as tears begin to stream down his temples.

“Think you can come with this?” Jayce questions, in an almost taunting tone, before he sucks a mark on Viktor’s clavicle.

“I… I don’t know,” Viktor admits, his words shaky and sounding foreign on his tongue from the bite and stimulation. He realizes a moment later that his words sound foreign because they literally do. His accent is thicker in the foggy, submissive state of mind Jayce has guided him into. However, the doubt on whether or not he could come from this setting is because he usually doesn’t bother with anything other than just a continuous vibration, and Jayce knows that. He finds the pauses unnecessarily disruptive and teasing—which is exactly why Jayce is doing it.

“C’mon baby, you can try,” Jayce coos, pressing the vibrator harder against Viktor’s cock, then releasing the pressure—rinse and repeat. A full-body shudder hits him from the varying intensity, making his eyes roll back in his head and fight against his restraints unconsciously. Unwillingly, his hips jerk with each vibration and a high-pitched whine leaves him when it crescendos. Then, he lets out a pitiful cry when the strong vibration ends and he’s left with scattered pulses.

“I-I was so close… Daddy, please… Help me come,” he practically weeps, his stubbornness against begging quickly dissolving when he’s so close to tipping over the edge. He still isn’t ready to beg for Jayce’s cock though.

“How badly do you want it?”

“I… I’ll do anything Daddy wants. Just please, make me come,” Viktor whimpers again, pressing against the vibrator urgently when it begins to buzz with consistency, only to have it taken away. He lets out a dry cry, feeling as though he’s hanging over the edge of a cliff, dangling from a rope, waiting to plummet into the endless abyss below. His eyes are shut tight and he’s in so much distress he doesn’t even register Jayce’s movement until he feels a hot, wet muscle lap at his cock. 

It’s like a crackle of lightning just struck him, triggering him to arch his back and moan unabashedly. His mind is in a thick haze, preventing him from any comprehensible thought other than this might be what heaven feels like. Hooking his legs over Jayce’s shoulders and squeezing his thighs around his head, he weeps while Jayce sucks his cock enthusiastically. 

His orgasm crashes into him like a tidal wave to a rocky shore, and part of him is positive his neighbours can hear him scream ‘Daddy’ at the top of his lungs. He blacks out, it’s impossible to tell for how long, but when he comes to, Jayce is still eating him out. 

The afterglow of an orgasm usually comes with a reprieve, but not this one. It feels like he woke up in a human centrifuge without the gradual build up, and all he can do is make unintelligible noises of overwhelming pleasure. His entire body shakes and tears freely streak down to his temples while Jayce licks and sucks at his sensitive cock, undoubtedly overstimulating him. At the same time, his pussy is leaking, his juices following the curve of his ass. His stubbornness has come out to play because in the back of his mind, the only thought that sticks with him is, I need to at least make it to two.

Viktor doesn’t need to hold on for long. He’s wound up tight so quickly that his second orgasm blindsides him. He sobs and trembles uncontrollably while Jayce’s broad hands stroke his sides soothingly, and Viktor has half a thought that maybe Jayce was made for just him, but the sentiment only exists in passing as he rides the rolling tide of pleasure. 

When he comes to again, Jayce is looking up at him from between his thighs, slowly licking his tingling cock as if to test him. Viktor inhales sharply, dropping his knees to release Jayce’s head, and whimpers, “Yellow.”

Jayce stops, pulling back a little to pepper kisses on his right inner thigh. “You’re doing so good, baby. Daddy’s proud of you.”

Those four words have Viktor crumbling into a hot mess of tears. If he were to psychologically analyze himself, he could easily recognize a child wound translating into a kink, but at the moment he has no awareness of why he’s sobbing. His vision blurs with the tears pooling in his eyes and all he can see is a shadow looming over him while careful hands unbind his wrists. They meet in the middle, with Viktor clinging to Jayce’s neck and Jayce scooping him up into his arms. He rocks Viktor back and forth and presses kisses to the crown of his head while he cries into Jayce’s clavicle. 

Viktor has no concept of time but he knows at least a few minutes have gone by before the tears stop. When he feels like he’s returned to his body, he tilts his head up and whispers, “Please… I need you, Daddy.”

“How could I say no to you, angel?” Jayce returns before easing Viktor back on the bed while kissing him tenderly. His arms remain looped around Jayce’s neck as he returns the kiss, letting out a tired sigh. The mental state he’s in is a mixture of euphoria, desperation and exhaustion, but he needs Jayce now to have the feeling of being tangled with and completed by him before sleep claims him.

Viktor allows Jayce to take control of everything. He accepts when Jayce shoves down his sweats and presses the head of his cock against Viktor’s entrance, eager for Jayce to take anything he wants from him. 

“Don’t be gentle,” he murmurs between passionate kisses and Jayce makes good on Viktor’s request. He had been easing into him, but Jayce pushes his hips forward and sinks inside within moments. With a pitiful whine, Viktor’s slightly aching inner walls clench around Jayce’s cock, trying to hold him there to relish in the feeling of being filled. 

“Let me know when you’re ready,” Jayce whispers before kissing the salty trails left behind by his cries. It makes Viktor’s heart shiver with emotion—what emotion, he’s not exactly sure—and cling harder to Jayce’s broad shoulders. With not even an inch between their torsos, Viktor nonverbally signals to Jayce to move by tapping his heel on his ass cheek. 

Pressing his forehead to Viktor’s, Jayce’s hands wrap around his waist like an anchor while he pistons his hips. Viktor’s nails dig into Jayce’s shoulders because the pace he starts with is enough to leave him breathless and gasping for air. “Daddy…” Viktor whispers when he’s regained his ability to consume oxygen, barely audible over the sound of their bodies crashing together.

“You’ll always be mine, baby,” Jayce returns sweetly, a drop of sweat travelling from his pointed nose to Viktor’s as he exerts himself. He thrusts into Viktor as if his life depends on it, and the head of cock continues to meet Viktor’s cervix in a dizzying embrace. 

Too blissed out to even register the claim of possession, Viktor taps his heel again—a silent warning that he’s close. Jayce gets the hint and speeds up the snap of his hips, punching one moan after another out of Viktor with each one. It takes him a few moments to notice, but Jayce has begun to babble in Spanish and none of it makes any sense to Viktor because he’s too blissed out to understand at this point, even if it was English.

His fourth orgasm of the day hits him even harder than the last ones, and he silently screams while shaking and clawing at Jayce’s back. The other man lets out a hiss and returns the sensation by biting Viktor’s bottom lip while he chases his own orgasm. “Cariño,” he moans as he spills inside Viktor moments later, who can only shudder in response. 

The afterglow that follows leaves Viktor boneless as his arms let go of Jayce’s neck and fall to either side of his head. Jayce rolls to the side, slipping out of Viktor slowly, and takes him with him. Tucking Viktor against him, Jayce holds him to his chest, petting his hair. It’s only then that Viktor notices how wet he is. With Jayce’s release dripping from his entrance and evidence of his own squirt clinging to his inner thighs, Viktor feels debauched and blissed out. 

Silence is their companion for a long time, but they don’t lack communication. Viktor’s fingers foxtrot over Jayce’s chest while nails scrape against his scalp, kisses are exchanged with whatever skin they can reach, and their deep breathing syncs up to calm one another. They’ve talked several times about aftercare, which Jayce has done countless times without the involvement of kink, and while it wouldn’t seem like it, the mute exchanges are exactly what Viktor needs to come back to his body. 

It’s Jayce who breaks the silence when he quietly praises, “You were, in fact, brave. I take back what I said.”

Viktor huffs a small sound of amusement against Jayce’s pec, keeping his eyes closed as he listens to his heartbeat. “Thank you… for everything. This was the perfect day.”

“It was for me too,” Jayce murmurs before kissing his crown again. “Let’s get you cleaned up and into bed. You seem exhausted.” 

“I am… you tired me out.” 

Jayce carries Viktor to the bathroom and cleans him up gently. They get ready, completely naked with the exception of Viktor’s socks, but Viktor takes shortcuts to get into bed sooner rather than later. When they do climb in bed, Jayce spoons him and whispers, “Goodnight, angel.”

“Night, Daddy,” Viktor replies just as softly, a small smile on his lips. Then, he’s able to fall asleep within minutes while feeling safe in Jayce’s arms.

Tuesday 9:13 PM

V 💕
I want to go to the movies again.

J ❤️‍🔥
this wknd?

V 💕
Yes.
They’re showing You’ve Got Mail at a small theatre here in Zaun on Friday.
I also want to get dinner beforehand. 
Somewhere nice.

J ❤️‍🔥
i really have spoiled u
but as u wish 😘

V 💕
Thank you, Daddy. 🥰

J ❤️‍🔥
fuck
u can’t just call me that out of the blue
i got a semi just reading it 

V 💕
Good. ❤️

Chapter Text

Monday, June 1st – Tuesday, June 2nd, 2020

Something isn’t right, and Viktor can’t figure out what it is. He spent Friday and Saturday with Jayce, and even ate breakfast with him Sunday morning before he had to leave. But, for some reason, by the time the evening rolled around, Viktor was depressed. They spent all of Saturday in bed. Viktor had so many orgasms, and so many new experiences, that he lost count. Spanking, choking, bondage, a new paddle and ball gag Jayce had invested in, and so much back-to-back sex that it left his head spinning. And the aftercare of a bath, a hot home cooked meal, and endless affection left him blissed out. They were having fun exploring this new shared dynamic, and Viktor was high on endorphins almost all day, but suddenly… he felt empty. I should feel good. This weekend was great. So why do I feel like this? 

He goes through the motions at work on Monday, however, Powder notices something is off.

“What’s eating you today?” She asks while they’re having Chinese takeout for lunch in his office.

“Nothing,” he says without emotion, shoving plain noodles in his mouth as a way to avoid talking.

“Bullshit. You’re acting weird… like, depressed weird. Did something happen with nerdy hunk?”

“No. Nothing happened with him,” he lies. Well, it’s partially a lie. I don’t think it has to do with him but… all I want is to have him hold me or something.

“Are you just in like, a rut or something?” 

“I guess.” It would make sense. I hate my job and I’m scared of change but it’s written on the wall clear as day: I need to get out of here.

“I’ve got an idea to cheer you up,” Powder perks up, grinning mischievously.

“Oh no,” he says deadpan, poking at his Peking chicken. “Something tells me this is for you and not me.”

“No, trust me, you’re gonna love it. And I bet your boyfriend’s gonna love it too.”

Viktor doesn’t even have the energy to correct her, so he sighs and says, “What do you have in mind?”

“It’s a surprise!”

“You know I hate surprises.”

“Trust me on this one.”

Warily, Viktor decides to trust her. They carpooled together that morning because his hip was acting up, so it’s convenient when she kidnaps him for her plot to make him feel better. When they get there, he’s confused because they pulled up to… a salon?

“Why are we here, Powder?” He asks suspiciously.

“Look, nothing makes me feel better than getting my hair done. When I chopped off all my hair last year, I felt so free and new. Maybe a little change will help you with your slump,” she says, trying to sell him on it.

Viktor had short hair until he was thirty. He started growing it out simply on accident. He got too busy to go get it cut, then it got so long he thought he’d grow it out of curiosity. But now… “I don’t want to cut my hair. I like it long,” he pouts, and in the back of his mind he thinks about all the times Jayce has played with or complimented his hair. 

“You don’t have to. You could get it coloured instead!”

“... Like what? Because I’m not dying my hair blue like yours.” 

“No, I don’t think fashion colours would suit you. Highlights are kind of like… basic, so it’s a good place to start from.”

“You want me to get highlights?”

“Yeah! I think it would look cute underneath your hair and the ends specifically. It would bring out your eyes more too.”

Viktor groans, feeling irritable and reluctant. “What if I don’t like it?” More importantly, what if Jayce doesn’t like it?

“Then you can just dye your hair back to your natural colour, simple as that,” Powder encourages, nudging his arm with her elbow. “C’mon, live a little! Your boyfriend might like it too.”

“Not my boyfriend,” he mumbles. “Fine. I’ll try it.”

Throwing her hands in the air, hitting the car roof, she yells, “YAY!!! I win!!! Ow.”

Viktor isn’t sure how he feels about it at first. The blonde isn’t… too intense, a neutral sandy blonde apparently. It’s actually a nice subtle change to his appearance, if he’s being honest, just odd. Powder’s usual hairdresser, a tall, curvy black woman in her forties named Petunia with blue, pink and green pixie cut, asks him, “So, what do you think, hun?”

“I… um… It’s nice. Just unusual. I don’t recognize myself, even though it’s just a slight change.” I’ve been dissociating while staring in this mirror for an hour and a half, so I didn’t actually attempt to get used to it. “I do appreciate that you were quick.” And that you mostly chatted with Powder. I’m not very good company right now.

“I think it looks amazing,” Powder says, and he knows she’s trying to be the supportive sister and cheer him up, but he’s just so numb he can’t fully appreciate it right now.

After he pays and they get back into Powder’s little blue PT Cruiser, he says, “I appreciate what you are trying to do, Pow, but I don’t think it worked.”

She has a sombre smile when she nods at him before saying, “I gotcha. Do you regret it?”

“No, it’s nice looking, just… I don’t think I’m able to fully… take it in right now.”

“No prob. Maybe you just need to get some rest?” 

“Maybe.”

Powder drops him back home just after seven and Rio is letting out many displeased meows when he steps inside. Viktor feeds her and he’s aware he should feed himself, but he just doesn’t have the energy. So, he changes into some sweats, self-indulgently putting on the Star Wars t-shirt that he stole from Jayce, before climbing into bed and falling asleep.

It’s eleven when he wakes up again. He notices he has text notifications from Jayce but, for some reason, his gut says to avoid it. So, he instead gets up and actually tries to eat. He settles on cup ramen and grapes to follow it, so he at least has a fruit in him, then sits in front of the TV and watches Dirty Dancing. He’s aware that he misses Jayce, and maybe the depression is related to him, but he doesn’t know what to do with that. Do people miss their fuck buddies? Is that normal? Well, he’s my companion so… I guess that would be normal.

It’s just after 1 am when the movie ends and he finally looks at his text messages.

Monday 10:36 PM

J ❤️‍🔥
hey baby
couldn’t talk all day, it’s been crazy at work
plus i had a work dinner
i miss u and hope ur takin care of urself 

The words have tears springing from his ducts immediately and a sob finally slips past his lips. He isn’t even aware of why he’s crying, there’s just a heavy feeling weighing down his entire being that he can’t escape. Just like the weekend of the anniversary, Viktor impulsively hits the call button on Jayce’s contact card. This time, he doesn’t try to hide the tears, and he isn’t even cognizant of the time, all he wants is Jayce right now.

An answer comes after about five rings and Jayce’s voice, rough from sleep, answers. “Vik?”

The sound of Jayce’s voice only triggers more sobs. He thought it would be soothing to hear, but it only makes the weight in his chest burn him, melting away his insides until there’s nothing left.

“Baby? What’s wrong?” Jayce is suddenly alert on the other end, the rustling sound of his sheets a backdrop to his anxious inquiry. 

“I don—I don’t know,” Viktor cries, curling in on himself on his couch, then he begins to talk in a rush. “I just—I just feel so—I feel awful, and I miss you, and thinking about you hurts and—”

“Whoa, whoa, slow down. Take a deep breath for me, angel.”

Viktor inhales sharply but does his best to exhale slowly. The tears are still flowing but he is at least breathing a little more evenly and not hyperventilating a minute or two later.

“What’s going on, Vik?”

“I just… I’ve been feeling awful. Almost all of yesterday and today. I don’t know what it is. I feel like I should be, I don’t know, at least somewhat happy because I had a lot of fun this weekend, but for some reason… I just feel empty.”

“Oh.” Jayce says quietly, then there’s more rustling in the background.

“Oh?” He questions, because it sounds like Jayce knows exactly what’s going on.

“I think you’re experiencing sub drop.”

“… What’s that?”

“I meant to talk to you because I’ve been doing more research into this kind of dynamic and, yeah, it’s basically… well, when you burn out all the happy chemicals in your brain in a scene and there’s none left to regulate you.”

“Oh…”

“Listen, I’m going to come over. I know you hate when we do weekdays because I have to wake up early, but I’m worried about you.”

“No, Jayce, it’s…” Viktor pauses to glance up at the time displayed on his TV screen. “Fuck, almost 1:30. You wouldn’t get here until after two. You should really just… go back to bed. I’ll be fine…”

“Don’t bullshit me, Vik. You didn’t call me in the middle of the night for nothing,” Jayce replies with a stern tone before his voice softens. “I’m coming over to take care of you, baby.”

Viktor’s heart clenches in his chest while he wipes away his tears with the heel of his hand, his will to argue dissolving at the sound of the pet name. “O-Okay…”

“Why don’t we stay on the phone until I get there? I’ll pack quickly, I just need to throw some work clothes in my bag.”

“Yeah…”

There’s a pause on the other line before Jayce sighs. “I’m rethinking this. Do you have sick days?”

“Yes… why?”

“Why don’t I come over and we take the day off?”

“You said work is busy, though,” Viktor sniffs. Even though he’s rationalizing not to, the idea of a day off is sounding very appealing.

“Yeah, but… this is more important to me right now. Plus, I’ve been learning I can’t just be tied to work all the time. I need a life.”

Chewing on his bottom lip, Viktor internally debates the pros and cons. Pro: More time with Jayce. Con: Guilt for missing work and also making Jayce miss work. Pro: Using PTO. I haven’t done that once all year. Con… I can’t think of any others. “Okay.”

“Alright, I’ll shoot my boss a text now letting her know I won’t be in. They can survive a day without me.”

“I will send my director a Slack message,” Viktor agrees, removing his phone from his ear to do just that and staying silent for a minute. When he’s done, he says, “I’m sorry for waking you up, by the way...”

“Don’t. I’m glad you called when you needed me,” Jayce reassures while he packs his bag, presumably. “Why are you up so late on a week night?”

“I got home at seven and napped until eleven. I numbly watched Dirty Dancing and ate instant ramen in an attempt to get rid of the bad feelings.”

“Mierda, that bad, huh? I wish you had told me sooner.”

“I didn’t want to bother you since I just saw you and I didn’t… I didn’t see it as your problem,” Viktor confesses. 

“It’s not my problem, it’s something you’re experiencing that I want to support you through. Simple as that.” A zipper can be heard on the other end while he pauses. “Look, if you ever feel this way, I want you to tell me. Doesn’t matter what day or time, I will pick up if you call.”

The fact that Jayce is willing to go through so much effort for him when their relationship holds no obligations makes his chest tighten, however it’s guilt that has a grip on his insides. “Jayce… I don’t… I’m not worth that amount of trouble.”

“It’s not trouble. You are worth my time and care and that’s my decision to make. I mean it, if you need somebody, you can call me and I will show up.”

“... Thank you,” Viktor finally concedes, accepting that Jayce is going to care for him no matter what he says or does. “Can you tell me about your day, you know… to distract me?”

“Yeah, I’ll be vague so you don’t know what I do for work but basically things are about to get extremely busy for me.”

“Oh? Why is that?”

“Uh… Let’s just say I have to deal with the FDA.”

“Ugh, FDA paperwork is a pain,” Viktor reacts instinctively, though in that moment, he realizes… Shit, we might work in similar fields. Then again, he could very well work in pharmaceuticals or something like that.

“Oh, so you’re familiar,” Jayce laughs easily, not at all disturbed by the shared experience. “The project I’m working on is going through its first FDA review. We’re nowhere near completion but we need the green light to proceed any further. It could take months, which is… frustrating.” 

I remember working on the pre-clinical review paperwork for our neural connector prosthesis. We were about to do more pre-clinical testing with the updated prototype when it got shelved… God, I miss that project. Sniffing into the receiver, he combs a hand through his hair as an even deeper sadness weighs him down.

“Baby?” 

“Yeah?”

“... Are you thinking about your last project?”

I swear to god he can read my mind. “Yeah…” 

“I’m sorry that got taken from you… I imagine work isn’t helping your mood,” Jayce continues to say and a jingle of keys can be heard on the other end.

“No, it’s not… I think I’m at the end of my rope, Jay.”

“Yeah. I think it’s time you got the fuck out of there.” There’s the familiar ding of the elevator.

“Fuck,” Viktor groans, rubbing his eyes. He’s quiet for a long moment, just listening to the sounds around Jayce on the other end, which is mostly the elevator. “Again, I’m sorry it’s so late.”

“Don’t be. No more apologies, angel.”

Lying down on the couch and placing his phone on speaker next to him, he confesses, “I like when you call me angel…” 

He hears a car door, presumably Jayce’s, before he replies, “Well, I like when you call me Daddy.”

“Me too… We haven’t really talked about it but, um… Do you consider yourself my Dom now?”

“Well, that depends… Do you want me to?”

Viktor chews on his bottom lip, curled in on himself. I want it, don’t I? I’m scared to want it. I think maybe I’m scared of rejection specifically.

“Wait, I realize that was an unfair way to ask,” Jayce continues. “I want to be your Dom. I’m still learning what that means and how to be one, but I want to. Do you want that?”

“Yes,” Viktor says automatically, a little too fast. “I mean… Yes, I would like that. I have been doing, um… a little bit of research, here and there. By research, I mean mostly following BDSM educators on Instagram.” He lets out a small, uncomfortable laugh, feeling as though he’s admitting to a secret. “I wasn’t sure if… If you wanted it to be a thing or if it was just a casual kink for you.”

“At first I was like, ‘Daddy kink, cool, I’m into it’, but um… the more I read on it, the more it resonated with me. Remember our conversation a couple months ago, the first time we went to the movies?”

“Yeah… You said you liked taking care of me.”

“Yeah, it makes me feel good. And the more I read about Daddy Doms, it’s like staring in a goddamn mirror.”

“I’ve felt that way reading about like… how other people experience submission? I also realized that, um… I really liked you picking out my food, ordering for me, and making decisions for me because of it,” he explains, petting Rio who walks past the couch before leaping on the arm. “I don’t think this will surprise you, but I’m always… neurotic, tense and in-control when it comes to work and life in general. You taking care of me is a vacation from that.”

“I read that a lot of submissives have that same experience—subbing being an escape from the rat race, y’know? Also, with the ordering thing… I thought that was autism related.”

“I think it’s both. Food is especially stressful because I’m pretty sure I have avoidant ARFID. Part of why my reaction to certain foods are so, um… visceral?”

Jayce chuckles on the other line. “I like to just think of it as honest. But ARFID makes sense.”

“Yeah. I thought I was just picky but when I read up on it, it clicked.”

There’s a brief silence between them while Viktor shuts his eyes and listens to the background sounds of passing cars from Jayce’s line. When Jayce speaks again, he doesn’t bother to open his eyes, preferring to imagine him in the room with him.

“I want you to know that… anything you need, be it help deciding what to eat, a hug, or a spank,” Jayce pauses to laugh softly, “I’m here for you. No matter what day or time it is.”

“Ditto,” Viktor says in a drowsy candour. 

“You gonna fall asleep on me, baby?”

“Mm… Might doze. ‘S that okay?”

“Yeah, as long as you can get up to let me in. I don’t think Rio can reach the lock.”

Viktor snorts. “Yeah… ring the doorbell, that should wake me up. Could you… stay on the phone?”

“Yeah, baby. I should be there in twenty.” 

Viktor drifts off, registering various ambient noises and Jayce humming a song he doesn’t recognize, but he’s barely cognizant of it. Eventually he hears Jayce’s voice again saying, “Hey angel, I’m here. You awake?”

“Mm… ‘m coming,” Viktor moans softly, forcing himself to sit up. He hangs up and stands, a little wobbly on his feet and needing to lean heavily on his crutch. When he finally unlocks the front door, Jayce is already standing there in a t-shirt and sweatshorts, hair mussed from sleep because he didn’t even bother to brush it before coming over. He steps inside, drops his bag and two things happen at once. 

Viktor dissolves into tears just as Jayce wraps his arms around him. He sobs into the soft fabric of his shirt, and immediately Jayce bends to scoop Viktor up, bridal-style, while his walking aid clatters to the floor. “It’s okay baby, Daddy’s got you,” Jayce coos softly, kissing his hair and carrying him to the couch. 

When Jayce sits down, Viktor is relieved he can sit in his lap and curl into his chest. The tears are endless but Jayce is a firm presence, holding him, rocking him, and peppering kisses to the crown of his head. “That’s it baby… I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” 

Viktor has no idea how long he’s weeping in his arms, but Jayce doesn’t waver once. When he’s a little more lucid, though exhausted from his breakdown, he whispers, “Thank you… for coming.”

“Of course, angel,” Jayce replies, pressing another kiss to his forehead. Then, Jayce blinks at him. “When did you get highlights?”

“Oh, uh, today… My sister talked me into it. I don’t know how I feel about it yet,” Viktor pauses, looking up at Jayce with hopeful eyes and chewing on his bottom lip. “Do you… Do you like it?”

“Yeah, a lot,” Jayce smiles softly, twirling a dyed lock of Viktor’s hair around his index finger. “Brings out your pretty honey eyes.”

“That’s what my sister said,” he chuckles quietly, though he sounds exhausted when he does. 

“You wanna get in bed? I know you napped for a while but you seem tired.” 

“Yeah… I’m just going to brush my teeth, not bother with the rest.”

“Want me to carry you or do you want to walk on your own?”

“I’m not going to lie and say I don’t like it when you carry me. And my hip is pretty bad today,” Viktor grumbles, rubbing his hip unconsciously. 

“I’m sorry, can I get you anything? Did you take your muscle relaxers?” 

It’s in that moment that Viktor is floored with the same feeling he’s had several times in the last few weeks—the feeling of being known. It’s small, but the fact that Jayce knows he has prescription muscle relaxers, because his leg muscles frequently tense and spasm, and is asking if he remembered to take them is intimate. That’s boyfriend shit, Viktor thinks as he tries to recover. However, much like with every other red flag that has waved in his face about his companionship with Jayce, he’s suddenly colourblind. 

“Um, no, I think I forgot to take them when I got home,” he admits, fidgeting with the hem of his—Jayce’s—shirt. 

“Alright, I’ll get you to the bathroom and get you your meds. I assume your pill case is on your desk?”

“Yeah…” 

“Then let’s get you to bed,” Jayce says with one more kiss to his forehead. 

Ten minutes later, Viktor is curled into bed on Jayce’s chest, who lets out an enormous yawn, betraying his seemingly-awake façade. In the quiet darkness, half-asleep and nearly unaware, Viktor’s walls completely crumble, making him raw and honest. “You’ve made my life so much brighter… I hope you know that.”

Wrapping his arms around Viktor tightly, Jayce whispers, “Ditto.” 

No other words are exchanged before they both drift to sleep.

“Hey, baby,” Jayce’s voice cuts through an unusual dream where Powder had a giant gatling gun, prompting him to open his eyes slowly. His vision is bleary when he sees the other man crouching next to the bed, stroking his hair gently. When everything becomes clearer, dim morning light is slipping past the blackout curtains and illuminating Jayce’s handsome smile down at him. “I got breakfast.”

“Breakfast?” Viktor mumbles sleepily before letting out a yawn. “What’s for breakfast?”

“I got your favourite. Sausage McMuffin, extra cheese, two hash browns, and a black ice coffee.” The hand in his hair continues to stroke him gently, and the fondness in Jayce’s eyes makes his chest feel warm.

“Are you from heaven?” He asks, grinning softly. 

Jayce grins back. “Nah. Just your dreams.” 

Snorting, Viktor weakly shoves his shoulder. “Cheesy doofus.” 

“I’m a doofus? Strong words, Mr. Cermak.”

“Get over it, Talis.”

Chuckling, Jayce leans in and rewards Viktor with a kiss despite the teasing. The warmth travels from Viktor’s chest to his stomach, causing it to swoop and fill with butterflies—a pleasantly familiar sensation now. Jayce is smiling down at him again when he pulls away, running his fingers through Viktor’s locks once more. “You need anything?”

“No. I’m just gonna do my morning routine then I’ll be out to eat. Did you feed Rio?”

“Yeah, I fed Ri before I went to McDonald’s.”

“Thank you. You’re a good babysitter,” Viktor smiles softly. 

“I try,” Jayce grins before kissing Viktor’s forehead. “I’ll leave you to it.”

Sitting up while Jayce leaves the bedroom, Viktor takes a look at his phone to check for any important notifications. A text from Powder leaves him in a sudden panic.

Pow 🦋
hey bro
casey said ur sick 
so im gonna bring u some soup around 1 
cool?

Viktor is relieved that it’s not yet 10:30, so he responds quickly. 

Vik 🐐
Don’t.
I’m fine.

A minute later, after he’s made his way to the bathroom, he gets a response.

Pow 🦋
y r u bein weird

Vik 🐐
No reason. 
I just don’t want you to come, got it?

Pow 🦋
GASP
UR PLAYING HOOKY ARENT U 

Vik 🐐
NO 
I needed a mental health day.
Recovering from my… weird mood from yesterday.

He’s being vague because there’s no way he’s explaining sub drop and, by extension, revealing his new dynamic with Jayce to her. It’s a boundary he’s not willing to cross with his little sister. While he brushes his teeth, another text comes in.

Pow 🦋
i could still bring u smth to eat
treat u to a club from jo’s diner

Vik 🐐
Powder. Please don’t come.

Pow 🦋
hold on
ur bfs there isnt he

Shit. She got me.

Vik 🐐
…
Maybe.
He’s not my boyfriend, though.

Pow 🦋
u had a menty b n called him didnt u

Vik 🐐
… No?

Pow 🦋
right right
cool
glad someone is takin care of ur depressed ass at least
is it helping?

Vik 🐐
It is.
When I woke up he had already fed Ri and gotten us McDonald’s. 
He’s doing far more than I deserve.

Pow 🦋
i disagree
ur gettin xactly what u deserve
a hot guy to feed ur cat and get u ur fav fast food
+ presumably good orgasms

Vik 🐐
We didn’t have sex. He’s purely here to help me get my head on straight.

Pow 🦋
and yall arent dating
sure sure
also ur head will never be on straight

Vik 🐐
Ha ha ha. Yes, I get it, I’m a faggot. 

Pow 🦋
i was referring to u bein mentally unwell
but ya 
ur also gay

Vik 🐐
🙄
Whatever. 
I’m going to go eat breakfast now. 
Don’t text me about work.

Pow 🦋
wouldnt dream of it
say hi to nerdy hunk for me
whomst i WILL learn the name of one of these days

Vik 🐐
Never. 

Viktor emerges from his room, dressed in a fresh pair of shorts but still the same shirt—Jayce’s shirt. Jayce is sitting on the couch, McDonald’s bag and drinks sitting in front of him. He smiles at the sight of Viktor and it makes his stomach shiver with butterflies. 

“Hey, baby,” Jayce greets him. The pet name sounds so normal now that it nearly disturbs Viktor.

“Hey,” Viktor returns, setting his crutch against the couch as he sits. “I’m, um… I’m feeling a bit better this morning.”

“That’s good, I’m glad.”

There’s a lump in Viktor’s throat when reality catches up to him. I’m feeling better—manageable at least. That means he doesn’t need to be here. “Um… You don’t… I mean, if you need to go… Er…”

“Are you trying to kick me out or are you worried I feel obligated to be here?” Jayce asks, seeing through Viktor’s attempt to give him an out.

“… The latter.”

“I don’t wanna leave and you’re not inconveniencing me.” Placing a hand on Viktor’s thigh, Jayce bumps their shoulders together. “Hey, I’m psyched to spend some more time with you.”

“Really?” Viktor hates how small his voice is, but Jayce’s touch makes him feel safe and free of judgement.

“Really. Now… How ‘bout we binge some Parks and Rec?”

In truth, Viktor is excited to have more time with Jayce too. He doesn’t voice it though, but he shows he appreciates Jayce making the decisions for him by cuddling up to him after breakfast is eaten. They vegetate and watch for hours, and Viktor can feel the heavy feelings fade away entirely. Happy brain chemicals restored, he thinks while enjoying Jayce combing his fingers through his hair, head resting in his lap. 

It’s around two when Jayce makes them both grilled cheeses. He strongly encourages (read: bribes with an additional t-shirt he can steal) Viktor to eat some veggies with it, and he reluctantly does so. It isn’t until five that Jayce says, “Shit, I just remembered I have dinner with my mom.”

“Oh,” Viktor says simply, trying to hide how mournful he feels. I’m both sad he’s leaving and sad I don’t have the same plans. Pulling himself out of Jayce’s arms, he sits up and his shoulders sag. “I assume you have to go.”

“Unfortunately… Listen, I’ll come by Friday. I think I have to work this weekend, but I can at least come for the evening.”

“Okay.”

“You gonna be okay?”

“Yeah.”

Jayce quickly packs and Viktor escorts him to the door. When his companion is ready, Viktor looks up at him and says, “I’ll see you Friday. I’ll miss you,” he freely states, chewing on his bottom lip. 

“Yeah, baby. I’ll miss you too,” Jayce says before taking Viktor’s chin in one hand and tilting his head up. He connects their lips, kissing Viktor firmly and eagerly.

Cupping the back of Jayce’s neck with his free hand, Viktor returns the kiss with the same fervour. It’s needy in comparison to most goodbye kisses, like neither of them want to separate. In the back of his mind, Viktor thinks, I never want you to leave. I wish I had you all the time.

He feels far more human when Jayce leaves, compared to how he felt twenty-four hours before. Shocking even himself, he manages to make himself dinner that isn’t instant ramen. It’s only a couple hours later, while Viktor is curled up on the couch with Rio on his lap and his worn copy of Pride & Prejudice, that his phone vibrates.

Tuesday 8:49 PM

J ❤️‍🔥
hey baby
how u feelin?

V 💕
Okay. 
I’m alive and I don’t want to die.

J ❤️‍🔥
both positives

V 💕
Yeah.
I miss you already though. 

J ❤️‍🔥
i miss u too ❤️
i would've stayed longer but i didn’t want to stand up my mom
i’ve cancelled on her like 4 times already

Guilt suddenly turns his stomach. He’s prioritizing me over his mother. I need to stop being so clingy.

V 💕
I’m sorry for eating up your spare time.
If you want to cancel this Friday, I understand.

J ❤️‍🔥
what????
no not at all
ur not eating up my time
i’m choosing to spend it with u bc i want to
i still wanna come over on fri

V 💕
Okay…
If you’re sure.

J ❤️‍🔥
positive
i want to spend as much time as i can with u
bc work is about to get crazy
so trust me
there’s no one i’d rather spend my time with

Thursday, June 18th, 2020

Viktor hasn’t sent anyone risqué photos or had phone sex since he was in his mid-twenties. However, when Jayce tells him he can’t hook up for the last two weeks because he’s so busy at work, Viktor considers it an option to get out some of his sexual frustration. So, for once, he initiates conversation with Jayce. He doesn’t do that often, mostly because Jayce is usually texting him ‘good morning’, or ‘was Rio mad when you slept in?’, or even ‘spent my entire meeting thinking about you’.

It takes him about a half hour to take the perfect picture. Ever since Jayce’s reaction to the Santa teddy, Viktor has considered wearing more lingerie for him. So, rather than something cheap on Amazon, Viktor orders nice lingerie. It’s a black, lacy bodysuit with a deep V and a high enough thigh cut that his hip bones are on display. To complete the look, he pulls on some black thigh-high stockings before sitting in front of the lengthy mirror on his bedroom wall. There’s a lot of adjusting his position, fluffing his hair so it’s sexy but not too messy, and holding his phone just right. 

When he finally has one of himself with his legs folded to the side, his best bedroom eyes, and one strap hanging off his shoulder, he’s pleased. However, he’s a little nervous to send it but he takes the leap anyway.

Thursday 09:14 PM

V 💕
[attached image]
Missing you, Daddy. xx 

Viktor sits on the bed, hoping for a response, and he only has to wait two minutes.

J ❤️‍🔥
holy shit
is that new??
baby u look
oh my fucking god
i wish i could come over rn
can i call u?

He was hoping he could get Jayce to be tempted enough to come over and plow him, but he’ll take what he can get. I know, realistically, I could go to The Last Drop again and find someone else willing to fuck me into oblivion but… it wouldn’t be the same. We have something good and the last thing I want to do is fuck it up.

Wait… Are we exclusive? I’m worried he’s found someone more convenient to fuck. I’m not exactly easily accessible.

Sighing and pushing aside the concerning thoughts, Viktor focuses on the phone sex they’re likely about to have.

V 💕
You can.
I’m still wearing it, by the way.

His phone rings moments later and he picks up immediately. “Hi, Daddy,” Viktor greets in his best sultry voice as he lies down on his bed. “I see you like my new outfit.”

“You look fucking divine. Puta madre, I want to rip it off with my teeth,” Jayce growls in his ear, sending a shiver down his spine.

“You could if you’d come over,” Viktor says, trying not to let his pout come through in his voice.

“I know, baby. Work has just been—ugh. I won’t get into it but I’ve barely had time to take care of myself.”

“Then let me take care of you,” Viktor impulsively replies, curling a finger in his hair, “I could make you dinner, ride you, run you a bath… whatever you want.” What the fuck am I doing? Take care of him? Like what, I’m his husband? 

“Really? Honestly, all of that sounds amazing right now. I can’t get away tonight or tomorrow but… would you be free Saturday night? I think I can finally escape then.” 

“Do you have maybe… fifteen minutes for me now?” Viktor chews on his lip, folding his knees and spreading his legs in anticipation.

“I think I can spare fifteen minutes,” Jayce rumbles, an evident grin in his voice.

“What’re you wearing?” 

“I wish I had a sexier answer for you but basketball shorts and a tank top.”

“Mm, that’s pretty sexy actually. I’d love for you to fuck me right after you finish a workout.”

“I’m sure that can be arranged.” Jayce chuckles at that before replying, “I’ve been thinking about you a lot these last two weeks.”

“Yeah?” Viktor bites back a grin as his fingers trace the hem of the deep V on his bodysuit. “Tell me, Mr. Talis… what have you thought about?”

It’s not the first time Viktor has used Jayce’s surname to address him, but the honorific is new. He doesn’t miss when Jayce’s breath hitches on the other line. “Well… I’ve been thinking about everything, to be honest. Making out with you, devouring your pussy, bending you over and fucking you until you cry,” Jayce sighs wistfully, and Viktor begins to feel heat between his thighs. “That blow job and eating you out in the lounge bathroom.”

“What would you do if you were here, right now, wearing what I am?”

“Dios mío, what wouldn’t I do? I would start by marking you up, on your collarbone and thighs. I would worship your pussy with my mouth… Tie you up and fuck you until you’re a weeping mess.”

Viktor’s breath halts in his throat and arousal roars between his thighs, wanting. “I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

“Have you been thinking about me?”

“Why do you think I sent you the photo?”

“To lure me over like a siren calling a sailor to the sea, I assume.”

“Sirens drown sailors.”

“You could drown me by sitting on my face.” 

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head. “You really love oral, don’t you?”

“Yes, it’s probably my favourite thing to do in bed. Don’t get me wrong, fucking you is amazing too, but I love tasting you. Now, what have you been thinking about?”

“Well… I should tell you, I bought a dildo that reminds me of you. It’s gotten a lot of use over the last couple of weeks.”

“Oh, fuck… would you let me watch you use it sometime?”

“Really? You wouldn’t rather fill me up with the real thing?”

“Oh, I will, I just want to watch you fuck yourself first.”

“Would you like to at least hear me?” Viktor’s fingers brush over the lace covering his sternum to groin, tracing the outline of his pussy lips through the fabric. 

Jayce’s breath hitches again and he whispers, “God, yes.”

Putting his phone on speaker and setting it on his nightstand, Viktor pulls open his bottom drawer to retrieve the dildo. It’s slightly larger than Jayce, but close enough, even visually resembling him with its realistic texture and appearance. Placing it on the side table, standing it up with the suction base, he then grabs his lube. “To answer your earlier question,” Viktor starts, unsnapping the buttons keeping the bodysuit closed between his legs. “I’ve thought about tasting you again. I’m so glad to have gotten rid of the condoms because I love feeling you, hot and salty on my tongue.”

“Fuck… God, I love what you can do with your mouth. Not just sucking my cock, but your dirty talk, and when you ramble in Czech because you’re too fucked out of your mind to speak anything else.”

Flicking the cap of the lube open, Viktor squirts out a little on the fingertips of his left hand before putting it back down. “I believe you said ‘sharp tongue and impeccable head’, if I recall.”

“And I fucking meant it—was that lube? Tell Daddy what you’re doing, baby.” 

“Yes… I’m going to as long as you do the same,” he replies, face flushed at the order. Reaching down, Viktor pushes the tips of his fingers past his folds, circling his entrance to spread the lube. “I’m making sure I’m nice and slick… teasing before I start to open myself up.” 

“If I was there, I’d watch and make you beg for me to help.”

“Oh, I would be begging, would I?” Viktor sounds amused, though it’s all talk. The memory of being tied up and begging for Jayce to make him come resurfaces and he has the urge to melt and give in. Still, he tries to maintain some semblance of control in the situation. “Hm. I think you’d be begging to touch me and taste me. I can do just fine on my own.”

A chuckle and a hum comes from the speaker and Jayce says, “If that’s so, why did you send me an unsolicited thirst trap?”

Fuck. He’s got me there. “Well… I’ll admit, the real thing is better than silicone. Silicone doesn’t have a pulse and can’t fill me up the same way.”

“Exactly. I think I could make you beg for it. Again. I’d watch you torture yourself, edge yourself, hoping I’ll crack and make you come…”

Viktor takes in a sharp breath, pushing one finger inside himself. It’s barely satisfying, not at all a stretch, so he immediately pushes in a second. “I have to use two fingers to get anywhere close to how one of yours feels…”

“Fuck… curl them inside yourself for me, baby,” Jayce demands, his breath coming out in shallow puffs. “I want you to think of me pressing on your sweet spot. Just like I’m thinking about your hand on my cock.”

Following his instruction, Viktor does just that—shuts his eyes and pretends it’s Jayce pressing on his g-spot. “Daddy…” 

“Can you add a third?” 

“Mhm,” Viktor agrees, sliding a third finger inside. The glide is so easy because he’s soaking. “I’m so wet, Daddy… I bet I could take it right now.”

“Jesus Christ… do it, angel. Think of my cock while you fuck yourself with it.” 

Viktor lets out a pitiful whimper, his favourite nickname making his oesophagus tremble with butterflies. Removing his fingers, Viktor grabs the dildo off his nightstand and immediately begins to rub the head between his folds. “I’m picturing you leaking and rubbing it all over my pussy… toying with me before you give me what I want.”

“For a man who impatiently demands to be fucked, you love to be teased, don’t you?”

“It’s more build up. It makes finally getting fucked so much better.”

“Mm… just so you know, I’m already leaking… using it so I can stroke easier.”

“Kurva, wish I could taste you…”

“You gonna slide that cock in your pussy for me, baby?”

“Yes,” Viktor murmurs, slowly pushing the dildo inside with a heady moan. “It’s so big, Daddy…”

Groaning on the other line, Jayce asks, “What does it feel like?”

“Feels like you stretching me open… but not as good.” When the Dildo is inside him, all the way to the base, it bumps against his cervix. The contact with the sensitive muscle makes him shudder, and he can feel himself drooling around the silicone. “I’m so wet for you… If you were here I’d let you fuck me any which way you wanted.” 

“You know I’d choose missionary just so I can kiss you.” A growly moan comes through the speaker, triggering a tingle on Viktor’s scalp. “God, I love kissing you… I’ve been addicted to it since I kissed you that first night.” 

Viktor’s heart flutters from the confession, analyzing the words in his head. I love kissing you. Love. “I love kissing you too,” Viktor reciprocates, though there’s a twinge of disappointment in his lust-addled mind. It’s a love for affection, not me. 

“Wish I had you beneath me, crying on my cock, so I could swallow every noise you make,” Jayce’s voice comes out husky and strained. “Stroking myself thinking about it.”

Viktor starts to move the dildo in and out of his pussy, moaning softly from the friction and repeated contact to his cervix. “Wish it was you thrusting inside of me right now… I’m so tight from so little prep…” 

“F-Fuck. Christ. Viktor.”

“I know you’d feel so good inside me,” Viktor continues, speeding up the movement of his hand to fuck himself with earnest. Moans and whines slip past his lips in between his words. “Hot. Thick. Hard… just for me.”

“Yeah, baby… just for you,” Jayce almost whimpers, and oh how delicious of a sound it is. Beautiful, high pitched and teary. “No one else.” 

I hope that’s true, Viktor thinks in the back of his mind but he smothers down the thought, focusing on his pleasure instead. His thighs are quaking and Jayce can undoubtedly hear the sounds of his wet cunt being pounded by the silicone toy. “Come for me, Daddy… Tell me how good I’d feel wrapped around you.”

“Me sentiría como si fueras el cielo,” Jayce moans, his breath ragged and pulled taut, like his body is ready to snap in two and all he needs is one more push. “Perfect. You’d feel perfe—oh, fuck—”

Viktor can only assume Jayce came, because he lets out an animalistic groan that goes straight to Viktor’s pussy. The pressure continues to build deep inside, like a canister of compressed air ready to burst, as he moves his hand so fast it hurts. Perfect. I’d feel perfect. Viktor’s orgasm hits him like all the oxygen is being punched out of his lungs, releasing a trembling cry. He feels a wetness against his hand holding the base of the dildo, certain he squirted, before his entire body goes limp. He doesn’t even bother removing the dildo right away. 

There’s silence on the line for a minute, from both ends, other than heavy breaths. “Not as good as with you,” Viktor says to break the silence, pushing his clean hand through his hair. “I squirted though.”

“That’s so fucking hot,” Jayce replies, though he sounds sluggish and out of it. “I wish I could feel it from here… your tight pussy greedily taking all of me.”

“I’d happily take it,” Viktor groans, finally removing the dildo. It’s coated in his slick, sticky release and while he’d normally clean up the evidence right away, he has an idea. “Give me a minute.”

“Alright.”

Picking up his phone and opening his camera, Viktor holds the dildo up to his mouth. He takes one picture of his tongue extended and his eyes focused on the camera, cradling the underside of the fake cock while tasting himself. Next, he takes half of it in his mouth, hollowing his cheeks, while his own release coats his lips. With one more photo successfully taken, he sticks the dildo on the bedside table then sends both to Jayce. “Sent you a little treat.”

“Oh?” There’s silence on the other line for a few moments before Jayce lets out a slew of curses in Spanish. “Vik—you can’t just tease me like this. God, you’re so beautiful.”

“Something to tide you over until Saturday,” Viktor says cheekily, grinning to himself as he relaxes into the sheets and rests his phone on his chest. “I’ll let you go now, I know you’re very busy.”

“Fuck, I really wish I wasn’t,” Jayce groans, and Viktor can just imagine him pushing up his glasses to rub his eyes, a habit he’s noticed over the last few months. “Is 6:30 okay for Saturday?”

“Yeah, I’m fine with that. Have a good rest of your week.”

“Yeah. You too. And thanks for the phone sex, and the selfies. I’ll definitely be using them later.”

Viktor bites back a grin, satisfied that he’s made it into Jayce’s proverbial spank bank, if he wasn’t already. “You’ll have to tell me about it later.”

“Happily. Goodnight, Vik.”

“Goodnight, Jay.” 

He called me ‘angel’ again, Viktor thinks once he hangs up, his face heating up with embarrassment and flattery. Why am I getting worked up over a silly pet name? He doesn’t mean it, just like he doesn’t mean ‘baby’—it’s all talk.

Shoving the train of thought aside, and the disappointment underlying, Viktor cleans himself up and gets into his pyjamas. He ditches the lingerie in his laundry hamper with the intention of washing it in time to surprise Jayce with it again on Saturday. When he gets in bed, he opens his group chat with Powder and Sky. 

Thursday 10:05 PM

Vik 🐐
Hey guys, I’m going to have to reschedule dinner. Something came up. 
I can do tomorrow though?

Pow 🦋
oh yea? smth came up? 👀
would that smth be tall, dark & handsome?

Vik 🐐
No comment.

Sky 💫 
Aw, I’m glad you’re getting to see nerdy hunk again! 🥰😘

Vik 🐐
… Why are you saying that like I wasn’t seeing him?

Pow 🦋
bc u have been such a grumpy gus the last 2 wks 
its obv u havent been seeing him
i was worried he dumped ur ass but i think u would be more emo if that happened

Vik 🐐
What are you talking about? I haven’t been grumpy.

Sky 💫 
Vik… you’ve been moping all week. 😔
Come on, you can be honest.

Vik 🐐
… 
Okay, yes, he’s been really busy at work. 
We couldn’t even hang out last time, he just came for a few hours.

Sky 💫 
He finally made time for you?

Vik 🐐
You’re saying that like he’s my boyfriend.

Pow 🦋
… 🙊

Sky 💫 
… 🙂‍↕️

Vik 🐐
For the last time, he is NOT my boyfriend.

Sky 💫 
V… you’ve been seeing him almost nine months. He’s kind of your boyfriend. 

Vik 🐐
It’s not like that. I told you, we have an arrangement. 
I’m just… making him dinner and having sex with him, it’s no strings attached. 

Pow 🦋
vik u were sad u didnt hang w him last time
and ur making him dinner
name the last hookup u made dinner for

Vik 🐐
… No others, but it’s not like that. 
We’re just… sort of friends, I guess.
Anyways. Does tomorrow work?

 

Saturday, June 20th, 2020

When Saturday evening comes, Viktor is buzzing with excitement. As planned, he wears the bodysuit and thigh-highs, paired with a green satin robe that only reaches his mid-thigh. Usually he would dress casually, but because they haven’t seen each other in fifteen days—yes, Viktor has been counting—he wants to make it special. 

It’s 6:26 pm when Viktor hears Jayce’s car pull up. He heads to the door and takes a deep breath, preparing himself for Jayce’s reaction in person. For some reason, he’s nervous. Sometimes, he doesn’t quite believe that Jayce is attracted to him as much as he says he is, so doing something like greeting him in lingerie that may or may not suit him is a little nerve wracking. He liked it when they did it over Christmas, and he was very enthusiastic over the phone on Thursday, but he can’t help but feel like… things might change in person. Like maybe Jayce was just humouring him. 

Viktor snaps out of his thoughts when there’s a knock at his door and he opens it immediately to find Jayce on the other side, dressed like he just came from the office. He’s wearing a pink dress shirt with a navy tie and dark blue slacks, and his eyes light up when he sets his eyes on Viktor.

“Oh, madre de dios,” Jayce whispers reverently, stepping inside, closing the door in a rush, and dropping his duffle bag on the floor. Without warning, he hoists Viktor up by the backs of his thighs, lifting him until they’re face to face, prompting Viktor to embarrassingly giggle while dropping his crutch. Butterflies are beating in his stomach while he loops his arms around Jayce’s neck and wraps his legs around his hips as best he can. Wasting no time, the other man captures Viktor’s mouth in a heated kiss. 

“Missed you, baby,” Jayce says between meetings of lips and teeth, running his hands over the lacy hem of Viktor’s stockings. 

“Missed you more,” Viktor replies before licking into Jayce’s mouth greedily. God, I sound like a lovesick teenager. One of these days he’s going to get tired of how needy I am. 

Groaning into it, Jayce presses Viktor up against the wall of the entryway and starts ravaging his mouth while grinding against him. Viktor whines as heat pools in his gut. Combing a hand through Jayce’s hair, he allows his companion to have his way with him. Seconds later, Jayce is breaking the kiss to say, “I need to get my shoes off. Can we hit pause on this for like, thirty seconds?” 

Viktor’s hands hold either side of Jayce’s neck, brushing his thumb over his pulse point. “Let me take them off, for you. I’m taking care of you, remember?” 

“I do remember. You don’t plan on getting on the floor, do you?”

“No, set me down on the bench.” Obeying, Jayce sets him down gently. Sitting on the bench, Viktor spreads his legs, his crotch barely concealed where the snap buttons of the bodysuit meet, and pats the seat between them. “Put your foot here.”

“Alright… God, I want to rip that open and eat you out like now,” Jayce says as he follows his instruction, like he’s about to worship the ground Viktor walks on.

“There will be time for that,” Viktor replies, slowly tugging the laces free with careful movements while keeping his eyes on Jayce, intentionally trying to tease him. “What do you want to do first?”

Jayce licks his lips and without a second thought he says, “You.” 

With a chuckle, Viktor pulls off the shoe and gestures for Jayce to give him his other foot. He follows the silent direction without question, easily reading Viktor’s body language. “Here’s what I’m thinking,” Viktor starts, beginning to untie the second shoe. “Sex, anyway you want, then I’ll make you dinner, and then a bath?” 

“That sounds amazing, but you’ve given me a difficult decision to make. I want you every way, all the time, so it’s hard to pick one… I definitely want to eat you out first, though.”

“I could sit on your face.” With a smirk, he removes the second shoe, placing it on the floor and waiting for Jayce to make his next move.

“God, yes, please,” Jayce says before bending to pick Viktor up again. Kissing his jaw and down his neck, Jayce carries him to his bedroom while Viktor combs his fingers through his hair. When Jayce nips his skin, not enough to leave a mark, Viktor gasps softly. He feels desperate for Jayce’s touch already, eager to get him out of his clothes and into his bed as soon as possible. 

When they make it to the bed, Viktor takes his time stripping Jayce of his work clothes, all while Jayce’s hands explore his body and take in the lace hidden beneath the satin. He straddles Jayce’s lap once he’s down to his underwear, who pushes the robe past Viktor’s shoulders so it gradually falls to the floor. “You’re so fucking beautiful in this,” he growls, painting his favourite spot on Viktor’s clavicle purple with a bruise. Whining while he pushes a hand through Jayce’s hair again, Viktor rolls his hips and notices Jayce is already getting hard. 

“I just want to look good for you,” Viktor admits, inhaling sharply when Jayce’s rough hands grab his ass cheeks, forcing him closer. There’s undeniable heat between their bodies when their groins are pressed tightly together as Jayce’s growing erection bumps against Viktor’s own cock.

“I already told you, you look beautiful in everything,” Jayce reassures, kissing Viktor’s breastbone between the deep V of the bodysuit. “Not gonna lie and say I don’t love this, but you didn’t have to wear this just to get me to come over.”

“I know you’ve said that… but I don’t want you to get bored of me.” He tries his best, but Viktor is unable to hide the pout he has. It’s a fear that’s been stewing for at least the last week since he hasn’t seen Jayce in so long. 

Jayce leans away and looks up at him with confusion, pinching his brows together. “What? Why would I get bored of you, angel?”

“Because… I don’t know, maybe I don’t keep it exciting and fresh enough? I want to do the same things all the time because I don’t get bored of them, but you must be by now.” Frowning, Viktor absently plays with a lock of Jayce’s hair. “Like… were you actually busy with work?”

“Of course I was,” Jayce frowns back, cupping Viktor’s cheek. “I’m never going to get bored of you. I don’t care if we do the same things. Getting to eat takeout and watch TV with you is often the highlight of my week.”

He didn’t say fucking me. He said eating and hanging out. That’s either good or bad, so I need to be blunt. “And you’re not bored of fucking me, either?” 

“Absolutely not. I love fucking you, also a highlight of my week, but…” Jayce looks slightly bashful when he pauses. “I like hanging out with you just as much.” 

His heartbeat picks up, jumping in his chest cavity from the confession. Jayce genuinely likes this as much as I do. “I thought… I don’t know, I thought you weren’t coming over because you found—” What? Someone better? Someone he actually wants to date? I need to accept that this is temporary and he’s not going to want to play with me forever. “—I don’t know.”

“Found… what, like another hookup?” 

“I mean… yeah? It’s been two weeks, Jayce. And don’t think you have to spare my feelings. If you’re seeing someone else, that’s fine, just don’t string me along when I’ve come to expect… consistency.” Except it’s not fine. I don’t want you to see anyone else. I want you all to myself.

“Baby, you’re the only person I’m seeing right now,” Jayce says, brushing Viktor’s cheek with his thumb. “And, frankly, I’m not interested in seeing anyone else. I like what we have.”

That’s good, but… What do we have? Viktor wants to ask because the lines are so blurred now. They’re only seeing each other, they hang out, they have meals together, they go out on dates. 

Fuck. Are we in a situationship? 

Licking his lips, Viktor nods slowly and brushes his hand over the nape of Jayce’s neck, earning a shiver because Viktor might be the only person who knows he’s sensitive there. “So… work really has been hell?”

“You have no idea. I’m so happy to see you.” Kissing Viktor’s neck and holding his waist firmly, Jayce continues to whisper against his skin. “Like I said, I missed you. Been thinking about you these last two weeks.”

Holding Jayce’s head while he continues to leave a mark at the crook of Viktor’s neck, he lets out a sigh of relief. “Good, I… I like what we have too,” Viktor replies softly, turning his head to kiss Jayce’s temple. “I’m sorry work’s been stressful.” 

“It’s okay, doesn’t matter right now. What matters is you and me, baby.” Tipping his head up to meet Viktor’s lips, Jayce kisses him tenderly while their noses brush together, making Viktor’s heart flutter against his will. They end up making out for ten minutes before Viktor finally unbuttons the bodysuit and sits on Jayce’s face like he asked. Drinking him in eagerly, Jayce makes Viktor cry and tremble in euphoria until, slightly to his horror, he feels himself squirt all over Jayce’s face. 

“Oh my god, I am—I am so sorry,” Viktor says breathlessly, trying to dismount from Jayce’s face. However, Jayce just holds him in place and licks his cunt from his entrance to the tip of his cock, overstimulating him until he’s quivering. “S-Sakra, ty… jsi ďábelský.”

When Jayce finally releases him so he can sit on the bed, Jayce says, “Never apologize for squirting. That was fucking hot.”

“You’re depraved,” Viktor huffs out a laugh. “Your beard is soaked with it. I’m getting you a facecloth.” 

“Gracias, mi cielo,” Jayce says sweetly, sighing as he shuts his eyes. Viktor recognizes every word but ‘cielo’ and his curiosity is piqued. What could he have possibly called me? 

Subtly, without Jayce noticing, Viktor grabs his phone from the nightstand and heads to the bathroom. Partially closing the door, he tosses a facecloth in the sink and turns on the water before opening google on his phone. It takes him a couple tries to guess the spelling but when he finally gets it right (or google corrects him, more accurately), heat begins to seep into his cheeks. My sky. My heaven. My darling. It’s inherently romantic. 

Viktor can’t deny it anymore. Their relationship is romantic, at least to a degree. It’s no longer sex, it’s cooking him dinner and being called ‘darling’ casually. It’s late nights watching old TV shows after Jayce stepped out to get Viktor his favourite snacks. It’s getting gelato and listening to lounge singers on a Saturday night. They’re not lovers but… Jayce has been romancing him and Viktor has been reciprocating.

“Vik? Everything okay?” Jayce calls from the bed and Viktor now sees the sink is just shy of overflowing.

“Yep, fine,” Viktor replies, trying to hide the wavering in his voice as he quickly sleeps his phone and leaves it on the bathroom counter. He turns off the water and grabs the cloth, wringing it out and picks up his crutch again. Walking back to the bed, he sits on the edge and leans over Jayce. “Let me.” 

“I won’t argue,” the other man says, looking up at Viktor with an adoring smile that makes Viktor’s stomach tremble with the flutter of a hundred wings. Oh no, I’m in too deep, aren’t I? I’m enamoured with him.

Gently, Viktor cleans Jayce’s face with the facecloth, admiring his hazel eyes and the curve of his nose as he does. He’s trying to quell the anxiety that is stirring just under the surface due to this revelation about their relationship. But, despite his quiet shuddering breaths, he can’t retreat. Once the remainder of his release is washed away, Viktor whispers, “There, můj miláčku.” My darling. 

Jayce looks up at him in wonder because there’s no way he knows what Viktor said, but he knows the sentiment behind it. Reaching up to cup the back of Viktor’s head, he pulls him down and kisses him softly. Viktor goes easily where Jayce wants him to, no desire to do anything but become entangled with him.

Moments later he’s being manhandled, rolled over Jayce’s body so he can press Viktor into the bed while they kiss. Viktor’s fingers find Jayce’s hair once again, combing through the dark locks, while their lips embrace. The tenderness makes his scalp tingle and a need rises deep in his gut. Jayce gets impossibly close, their chests and hips flush together. His clothed, aching erection is hot against his exposed cunt, and Viktor feels desperate to have him inside him again.

“Vik… can I—?” Jayce manages to say between kisses, reaching between them to pull out his cock.

“Yes, you don’t have to ask,” Viktor whispers back, no other words necessary. Hiking his leg over Jayce’s hip, Viktor presses against Jayce’s ass with the heel of his foot. The hot tip of Jayce’s cock meets his entrance and begins to slide in. Without stretching him open, it’s a little uncomfortable, but Viktor doesn’t mind it. He simply holds on tightly to Jayce while his cock sinks inside of him, allowing him to devour his sounds of pleasure.

There’s a different way they’ve been having sex. Usually, it’s dirty and desperate, chasing each other’s pleasure, like the way Jayce ate him out before. But the way that they’ve gradually been doing more and more since New Years is something lovers do. Jayce kisses him and thrusts his hips in a way that’s charged with an emotional connection both of them are too scared to acknowledge. It feels like making love every time, and Viktor never wants to be without it. 

Losing him is going to ruin me. But, I need to enjoy it while it lasts, is what he thinks when he moans Jayce’s name and whines into another heated kiss. Jayce fucks him slow and deep, bumping against his cervix and rubs against his g-spot with every thrust. The pleasure and the thought of not having Jayce to himself indefinitely brings tears to his eyes, but he uses the guise of sexual gratification to hide the deep sadness he has beneath his weeping. 

Jayce hushes him, peppering kisses on his cheeks, jaw, nose and forehead. “I got you, angel,” he whispers comfortingly, cradling his cheek while he holds Viktor’s left thigh as leverage while he pistons his hips. “I’m not going anywhere.”

It’s like Jayce read his mind, as he’s been able to many times before. Viktor just allows himself to cry, burying his face in Jayce’s neck. I want this forever. I want you forever. I want us forever. I’m inconsolable because it can’t be forever…

When he comes, it’s with an unrelenting sob and Jayce kisses his tears away. A few more thrusts and Jayce spills inside of him, filling him like a honey pot with his sticky release. After some heavy breathing and sniffing from Viktor, Jayce pulls out, rolls on his back and takes Viktor with him. He encourages him to rest on top of his chest, which Viktor happily goes along with. Tear stains cling to his temples and the saltiness stiffens his hairline, but he feels sated at least. 

“Are you okay, baby?” Jayce asks it so sweetly it makes Viktor wish he wasn’t. Things would be so much easier if Jayce was just another inconsiderate Piltie asshole that Viktor mistakenly let into his bed. But no, Jayce is rubbing his back and kissing the crown of his head while he comes down from an intense orgasm and an emotional experience.

I don’t know what I would do if he… if he asked me to be his boyfriend. On one hand, I swore to myself I wouldn’t do this, a relationship is just out of the question. On the other hand… I haven’t been this happy in a long time. He makes me happy, even if it’s only for a few hours. What would it be like to have him all of the time?

“Vik?” Jayce’s voice is uncertain, laced with concern as he continues to rub soothing circles on his skin. 

“Sorry,” Viktor murmurs, tilting his head up to look at Jayce with a soft smile. I want to keep him, even though he’s going to break my heart eventually. “Was just out of it. I’m okay. Intense orgasm.”

“Okay, I was worried you might have been like… actually crying.” There’s a pause as Jayce combs his hand through Viktor’s hair. “Were you?”

“No, I’m fine,” Viktor shakes his head, resting it on Jayce’s chest. It makes him sick to lie to Jayce like this. “Really, I’m okay.” 

“Alright,” Jayce drops it, though he doesn’t sound convinced. He continues to stroke his back, humming a song that sounds familiar but Viktor can’t quite place. After a few minutes of quietly recovering, Jayce asks, “What’s for dinner, by the way?”

Looking up at Jayce with heavy eyes, a little tired from crying, Viktor replies, “Chicken paprikash. It’s just chicken in a paprika sauce. I also prepped some bread dumplings ahead of time to go with it.”

“Is that a Czech dish?” Casually, Jayce pets his hair, giving him rapt attention even when talking about something so mundane. “I remember you mentioned your mom taught you how to make it.” 

“It’s originally Hungarian but it’s pretty popular across eastern Europe. Traditionally it’s served with egg noodles but bread dumplings go with practically everything in Czech cuisine,” Viktor explains before giving Jayce a teasing smile, the tears forgotten now. “Don’t worry, I remembered to get white wine to go with the chicken. And it even has a cork.”

“Oh, wow, you’re really taking care of me, tonight,” Jayce grins, kissing Viktor’s forehead. “Seriously, you don’t have to do all this. If you’re too tired to cook I’m happy to get takeout.”

Pouting up at Jayce, Viktor accuses, “Do you not trust me to make you something? I promise, I’m pretty good in the kitchen.”

“Not at all, you’ve just been doing a lot of work already.”

“You fucked me. I barely did any of the work.”

“Bottoming is work. You took my cock like you were made for it,” Jayce growls with a shark-like grin.

Viktor suddenly flushes, feeling flustered by the statement and uncertain how to react. “I—Well, I… erm… thank you? I can’t tell if that was a compliment.”

“It was an admiration.” Leaning in, Jayce kisses his forehead several times. “I can clean you up this time.” 

“You don’t have to do that,” Viktor sighs at the affection before rolling off of Jayce. He can feel the cum dripping from his pussy, which is making him mourn his bedding, but he needed to change the sheets anyway. 

“I know, but I don’t want you to do all the work.” One last time, Jayce leans in to kiss Viktor softly. It’s brief, but Viktor manages to cradle Jayce’s face and pet his beard. 

When Jayce leaves to get another cloth, Viktor stares at the ceiling and tries to digest what he’s feeling. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t know what I feel anymore. I just know that I don’t want this to end and when it does, it will destroy me.

When Jayce comes back to bed, he gently parts Viktor’s legs to run the warm cloth over his thighs and pussy, cleaning him up as best he can. “Your phone’s in the bathroom, by the way.” 

“Oh, yeah, I left it in there when I was getting ready, I guess,” Viktor lies because he doesn’t want Jayce to know that he knows what was said. It feels like Viktor learned something he wasn’t supposed to know—a secret code uttered aloud he shouldn’t have deciphered. Guilt stirs in his stomach from the lie, though. Jayce might be the most honest person I know, aside from Sky. I feel dirty lying to him. 

Jayce thinks nothing of it and they move on. Once Viktor gets out of the lingerie and into his braces, plus some sweat shorts and an oversized t-shirt, he makes his way to the kitchen to start cooking. He appreciates that Jayce was kind enough to change the bedding for him too. 

Now dressed in a pair of basketball shorts and a tank top, Jayce sits at the kitchen island to watch Viktor work. “Need any help?” He asks.

“I promise, I am perfectly capable on my own,” Viktor says, grabbing two yellow onions from a bag on the counter. “It will take just over an hour, are you alright with that? Do you want a snack?” 

“Nah, I’m good. How has your week been, by the way?”

Sighing heavily, he grabs a chopping board and knife. Balancing on his good leg as he chops the onions, he replies, “Honestly, kind of shit. I actually updated my LinkedIn this week and set my profile to open to opportunities. I’m just tired of the bureaucratic bullshit. My sisters, fathers and friends have all been telling me to look for a new job for the last six months and I think it’s finally time to get my ass in gear.”  

Jayce raises his brows. “Fathers? Wait, you were like adopted or something right?”

Viktor pauses, not realizing he was speaking so… openly. “I… um… sort of. After my mom died, I was kind of taken in by a family. My sisters aren’t biologically related to me, we’ve just… Well, I’ve known them for fourteen years now. They’re my found family,” Viktor says with a soft smile, before it turns sombre. “It’s hard to think that, five years from now, they’ll have been my family longer than my mother even was…”

“I know what you mean. It’s weird to think my dad hasn’t been around for over twenty years now. It feels like yesterday, though,” Jayce sighs, propping his head up with a fist.

“Do you… want to talk about it?” 

“I mean… I don’t want to like, emotionally dump on you.”

“You’re not, I’m asking for it.”

The look in Jayce’s eyes turns morose as he drums his fingers on the countertop. “My dad was a workaholic, eh?”

“Yeah?” Viktor watches Jayce’s face and body for minute changes, tension and expressions, wanting to map out each subtlety and burn it into his brain. Crazy what a difference of nine months will do. If he tried to talk about this back in… well, even December, I would have shut it down.

“Yeah. When he died, I was… kinda angry with him. I felt like he wasted so much time working when he could have been acting like my dad. I remember, when I was ten, I was crushed that he missed me winning second place at the state science fair. But it wasn’t new. He even missed my ninth birthday party,” Jayce says with a weak smile, looking down at the granite countertop as he traces the abstract shapes of stone. “It took a lot of therapy to come to terms with my anger towards him, and my grief. Sometimes, I still feel angry at him, but I’ve also forgiven him… that sounds weird. Like, why the hell would I have to forgive my dead dad, y’know? He’s dead, that matters more than some… bitterness about him being absent.”

“I… kind of know how you feel. My dad got laid off when I was three. That’s when he started to drink his problems away and became… not a good person. So, since then, my mom had supported us by herself. It was even more difficult when we came to America. She was always taking extra shifts at the hospital but, when we became American citizens in 2001, the disability payments helped a little bit. She was still overworked, even in the early days after her cancer diagnosis,” Viktor replies, finishing with onions and grabbing his crutch to go to the fridge to grab the chicken. “I also had to… tolerate some anger toward her after she was gone. I don’t think I’ve fully processed it to this day, but I had to kind of accept that, even though I missed her like hell, I was still angry with her.”

Tilting his head while he watches Viktor prep the chicken thighs, Jayce asks, “Why were you angry with her?” 

“She… depended on me a lot when I was too young. She was diagnosed when I was fourteen and it was emotionally taxing on both of us. Plus we were already codependent and that fact made things so much harder,” Viktor says quietly before a memory resurfaces that makes him chew his lip anxiously. “She also… the way she told me she was dying fucked me up.”

“Do you… want to talk about it?”

“You really don’t have to be humouring me like this, Jayce.”

“I’m not humouring you, I want to hear about it.”

Viktor hesitates because the only person who knows this story is Sky, who supported him when it happened. Not even Powder knows. “Remember I told you we went to NYC when she was in remission?”

“Yeah.”

“Well… She told me while we were at the Statue of Liberty. She just kind of blurted it out because she couldn’t hold it in anymore. That wasn’t the worst part, though… She knew it had developed into small cell lung cancer two months before that.”

“Oh fuck… SCLC is no joke.”

It shouldn’t surprise Viktor that Jayce knows the difference between non-small cell and small cell cancer given that Viktor suspects he might actually be a medical doctor. “Yeah. I was… so fucking angry at her. I felt like she led me to believe everything was going well. She was in remission, I was about to start university, I was just starting T… I thought everything was falling into place. It was our worst fight, by far. I lashed out and screamed at her and didn’t speak to her for the rest of the night when I had finally stopped… I wish I could take it back now,” Viktor explains, his throat tight as he tries not to cry. 

“Hey, hey… We don’t have to talk about this right now if you don’t want to.”

“I know,” Viktor says quietly, a tear slipping past his waterline. Unfortunately, his hands are covered in raw chicken juice, so he can’t wipe it away, but Jayce is on it by grabbing a paper towel from the counter and dabbing his cheek. “Thanks… můj miláčku.”

“Of course, mi cielo,” Jayce reciprocates the pet name, stroking Viktor’s cheek with his knuckles. 

The conversation moves on from much heavier topics and Viktor even puts on some music while he cooks. It turns out, they have much more common tastes than he had suspected. Jayce practically jumps with excitement when Toes by Glass Animals comes on, which leads to a twenty minute discussion on the style comparison between their two albums, and their opinions on the released singles ahead of the next album. Viktor didn’t immediately like Your Love, while Jayce hyperfixated and listened to it on loop for three days. 

When they’re finally seated at Viktor’s kitchen table, Jayce looks eager to eat. “I’m really excited to try this. I don’t think you’ve made me any European food before.”

“I don’t think so either,” Viktor replies, smiling with a faint flush while a wave of anxiety rolls in his gut. I want him to like it. I’m nervous for him to try it. Fuck. Since when have I been trying to impress him? I thought I stopped caring about what he thought of me.

Viktor watches, subtly, as Jayce takes a first bite of chicken with a slice of dumpling and  a generous amount of sauce. Immediately his face lights up and he makes a pleasant sound around the bite. When he swallows, he finally says, “Baby, that’s fucking delicious.”

Warily, he narrows his eyes at Jayce. “You’re not just saying that, are you?” 

“Not at all. I’m not blowing smoke up your ass. I knew you were a good cook but this is amazing.”

“Well… You’re sweet.”

“Not sweet, just honest,” Jayce grins before taking a sip of the white wine Viktor had selected. Humming around the liquid, he savours it on his tongue and raises his brows. “Speaking of sweet, this wine isn’t dry… Though, I do think it cuts through the paprika.”

Viktor gasps in excitement. “Did I choose a good wine to go with it?”

“Yeah,” Jayce grins, then takes another sip. “You did good, baby. I feel spoiled already.” 

A flush heats Viktor’s cheeks as he averts his eyes, looking down at his food. Quietly, he murmurs, “Thank you, Daddy.”

There’s a playful smile on Jayce’s lips at the term of respect, clearly having appreciated it. After taking another bite, he asks. “Whatcha wanna do this weekend?”

“Um… I mostly want to laze around but… I thought getting outside might be nice?”

“Like where?” 

“There’s a park I really like about a ten minute walk from here. I kind of wanted to take my camera, maybe around sunset.”

“Hell yeah. I wanna see you in action.”

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head. “I promise it’s not that impressive.”

“Nonsense. You said you develop your own film, right?”

“I do. I like doing it myself because it feels… um, ritualistic?”

“I get it. I, uh… I feel that way when I’m building things.”

Viktor blinks at Jayce. “What do you mean ‘building things’?”

“Oh. I’ve made things with my hands for as long as I can remember. One day I’d like to get into carpentry, when I have the space to, but I’ve mostly tinkered.”

“... I do too,” Viktor says before grabbing his phone from his pocket. Scrolling back in his camera roll, he goes all the way back to December. Finally finding the video, he opens it and hands his phone to Jayce. “My sister has a thing for butterflies because her last name means butterfly in Dutch, so I made her this for Christmas.”

The video Jayce watches on his phone is that of the patchwork butterfly, built of cogs, bolts and various scraps of metal, flaps its blue painted wings. The music box tune plays from the phone, and he watches as Jayce’s mouth slowly falls agape. “Wait, you made this?”

“Yeah. I just ordered a bunch of metal odds and ends, plus glass crystals, and found a music box at a thrift store. It took me about two months, mostly because I was busy. If I had to guess, it probably took me about twenty or so hours to make? I made a few sets of wings before I was happy with them.”

“Vik, this is beautiful. Your sister’s a lucky gal,” Jayce compliments, scrubbing back through the timeline to observe it from different angles. “I imagine the mechanism inside was a pain to put together, given it’s so small.”

“Yeah, I definitely had to pull out my magnifying glass for it. Luckily, while my legs aren’t, my hands are quite steady.” Grinning, he takes back his phone and continues to eat. 

Their conversation moves on, from the news to favourite books, and eventually landing on classic movies they’ve never seen. “Really, you’ve never seen The Sound of Music?” Viktor asks while he sits and drinks his second glass of wine.

“Nope,” Jayce replies, working on loading the dishwasher, which he insisted on. “I actually know nothing about it either.”

“Okay, we have to.”

“Want to tonight?” 

Frowning, Viktor asks, “What about your bath?”

Jayce shrugs, washing his hands as he finishes up. “We can do that tomorrow. I’d honestly rather vegetate with you.”

“I do have to warn you, it is three hours long.”

“Three hours? What is it, a Marvel movie?” 

“... It’s kind of like Captain America, if you squint.”

“... Huh?”

“You’ll see the common thread, don’t worry about it right now,” Viktor waves off.

Curling up together on the couch, they finish the bottle of wine. Viktor drinks most of it before they even get halfway through the movie and when he gets tipsy, he craves salty snacks and sugar. “Can we order 7-Eleven?” 

“Hell yeah. What’re you craving?”

“Cheetos, those green frog gummies, and a Pepsi Slurpee.”

Humming in thought, Jayce decides after a few moments, “I’m getting Doritos, peanut M&M’s, and a Mountain Dew Slurpee.”

“... Can I steal some of your M&M’s?”

“Depends. Will you negotiate for amphibians?”

“Willingly.”

Jayce kindly pays for their snacks, and while he’s ordering, that’s when Viktor notices that his address is saved on Jayce’s Uber account. Yet another red flag. Fuck. How did I not notice this was a situationship sooner? Viktor thinks to himself, however, he corrects himself. I did. I did notice. I was just ignoring it.

“You good to keep watching?” Jayce asks, snapping him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah,” Viktor nods. There’s an underlying sense of dread in his chest that he’s been trying to dull. While he has an impulse to run away screaming, he instead curls into Jayce’s side, who wraps an arm around him. 

Two frozen drinks, four snacks, and two hours later, they’re climbing into bed, both stripping down to their underwear. Just like on the couch, Viktor doesn’t resist the desire to lie in Jayce’s arms. “I really did miss you,” he whispers in the darkness, raw honesty seeping out of him.

“I did too, baby,” Jayce returns, just as quiet while he combs his fingers through Viktor’s hair. “I’m hoping I won’t be so busy soon. I hate not seeing you for so long.” 

“Me too…” 

“I’ll try to make more time for you. I’m really bad at having a work-life-balance.”

‘He finally made time for you?’ Sky had asked him. It’s true, he did. It really is like he’s my goddamn boyfriend. “Thank you… for making time for me, I mean.”

“Of course. You’re important to me.”

Silence falls on them and Viktor can’t help but think, I have him right now. I can’t guarantee I’ll have him for much longer. So, what’s something I’ve always wanted to do that he can cross off my list? “You said maybe to somnophilia right?”

“Uh, which one is that again?”

“Fucking someone while they’re asleep.”

“Yeah… You wanna tonight or this morning?”

“Mhm, this morning. After seven, at least. I can take melatonin now so I’m really out of it.”

“I brought a couple things with me, by the way, if we want to spice it up a little.”

“Cuffs I assume?”

“Wrists and ankles, plus a blindfold. So, even if you do wake up, you can’t see anything.”

“I like that idea. Could you lay me on my side when you bind me? That’ll be the most comfortable, I think. Oh, and feel free to be as rough as you want.” 

“You got it, mi cielo,” Jayce whispers before kissing his hair. The new term of endearment leaves his cheeks heated as he hides his face in the column of Jayce’s neck. After a few moments of silence, Jayce continues and says, “Night, Vik… I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Looking forward to it,” Viktor huffs with amusement before rolling over and grabbing a melatonin from the bottle in his nightstand. After he takes it, he rolls back over and kisses Jayce’s cheek. “Goodnight, můj miláčku.”

Sunday, June 21st, 2020

Viktor moans softly, rousing himself from sleep, but his senses are dulled from drowsiness. From where he’s lying on his right side, he instinctively tries to move his left hand, to reach out to Jayce, but his other hand jerks with it. Adrenaline is suddenly flooding his system before he registers that he can’t see, and there are two fingers invading his pussy, pumping slowly. Another moan leaves him, prompting him to arch his back despite barely being conscious. “Daddy?” Viktor instinctively whispers, though he hardly needs any reassurance because he can recognize Jayce’s fingers by now.

“Yeah baby, it’s me,” Jayce soothes, and it relaxes Viktor as the intrusion pushes deeper. He feels as though he’s barely on the edge of consciousness, but he has enough capacity to move his legs to confirm—yes, his ankles are bound too. “Are you comfortable?”

“As comfortable as I can be,” Viktor replies drowsily. It’s a little nerve wracking, as someone who consistently has a need for control, to have your agency taken away. But the melatonin keeping him on the edge of sleep and Jayce’s right hand stroking his hair is enough to put him entirely at ease. His need for control, his anxiety, even the adrenaline, completely melts away at the touch. 

With his mobility and sensory input limited, he can’t help but focus on the thick fingers caressing his inner walls. He’s already so wet—he can hear and feel it—and part of him wants Jayce to say forget foreplay and fuck him already. Slow down, Viktor tells himself as Jayce’s finger tips dance over the nape of his neck. Enjoy what you’re getting now. He’ll get to it.

Lacing his fingers through Viktor’s hair, Jayce curls his fist into the roots and yanks Viktor’s head off the pillow. The sudden movement disorients him, but also adds to the arousal. “Listen closely, angel,” Jayce whispers, though there’s a sharp, predator-like bite to his words. “You won’t get my cock until you’re crying for it, understood?”

“Daddy…” Viktor whines pitifully, still in a drowsy fog. I shouldn’t have taken a whole extra strength melatonin, he manages to think before his senses are entirely submerged at particularly deep thrust of Jayce’s fingers. Hello, subspace… 

“Are you going to be a good boy and beg for me?” The fact that Viktor can’t see Jayce and all he can hear is this gravely version of his voice makes his Dom feel all the more dangerous. But he’s not afraid. He could never be afraid of Jayce.

Words don’t come naturally anymore and his head is empty of coherent thought. Clouds of scattered words hang above his consciousness, which feels like it’s drifting in an abyss of desire. All he can do is nod, a little bit of a strain given the large hand still gripping his hair. Jayce lets go when the nod satisfies him, allowing Viktor’s head to fall back on the pillow. The familiar comfort coaxes him back to a partial state of slumber, hazy in what’s happening to him. In his dozing, a third finger was added at some point—he couldn’t possibly say when—and the only sounds that leave his mouth are pathetic whimpers and feeble moans. 

The pleasure mixed with his lulled state makes him feel like he’s floating on a cloud, or being invaded by one more accurately. He’s so wrapped up in the sensation of Jayce's thick, calloused fingers that he doesn’t even register he is speaking at first.

“—you want that baby?”

“Hnn?” It’s the only sound he can make in response. Verbal communication is beyond him.

“Colour?”

Having enough wits about him to understand the question, Viktor raises a single finger—their nonverbal agreement for ‘green’. 

“Are you able to listen this time?”

Humming and nodding, Viktor focuses his hearing on Jayce. His heaving breaths of arousal overpower everything else around, ghosting over Viktor’s cheek and making him shiver. “Wanna… be good for… for Daddy,” he manages to pull together, tripping over the words as they tumble out of his mouth.

“I said, you’re so wet I could easily fill you with four. Would you want that?”

“Mmn,” Viktor manages to half-hum, half-grunt, with a slow nod. He certainly feels the stretch this time. The pain is present, but it’s dull and hardly distracting compared to the delicious sensation of being filled. The insertion is gradual, as taking nearly half of Jayce’s hand should be, given how large he is. His pussy clamps down on the four fingers spreading him open, the curl of the digits making him shudder. As soon as Jayce starts pumping his hand again, he finds it difficult to focus. The sound of his wet pussy taking it, his breath being punched out of his lungs, and the pressure against his inner walls make him dizzy. The pleasure builds, coiling in a tight knot in his core, ready to release from just a little more. Two words fall from his mouth involuntarily, followed by a weak sob. “D-Daddy… please…”

“What baby?” Jayce coos, slowing his movements and teasing Viktor mercilessly. “You want Daddy’s cock?”

Without the consistency of Jayce’s fingers thrusting into him, Viktor feels like he’s being edged because he nearly came from being partially fisted alone. His head is still in a thick haze of subspace and residual sleep. The only way he can possibly respond is with whines, cries and nods while gripping the sheets and clenching his walls around Jayce. A hand comes back to his head, petting his hair sweetly, easing the tension only slightly. 

“I will if you be a good boy and open your mouth,” Jayce promises as he pulls his fingers from Viktor’s cunt. He wouldn’t have needed to promise anything for that, because Viktor obediently opens his mouth with his tongue extended expectantly. The pads of two fingers touch the muscle before sliding over it, and before he can process, all four of Jayce’s fingers have relocated from his pussy to his mouth. Without needing instructions, he closes his mouth around the digits and sucks. Tasting himself is not unfamiliar nor is it humiliating, it simply adds to his arousal and need to worship his Dom. Eagerly, he cleans each of Jayce’s fingers with his tongue, moaning unabashedly. 

“Good boy,” Jayce praises, rewarding Viktor with more pets to his head. Moments later, he’s retracting both hands, though one is immediately planted on Viktor’s left hip. Viktor doesn’t have to wait long until he feels a familiar intrusion: Jayce’s cock pushing past his folds. Viktor holds his breath, mouth ajar, while he slides his cock inside. When Jayce bottoms out, the tip of his cock kissing his cervix, Viktor lets out that breath in a sigh of relief. 

Jayce doesn’t take his time. He immediately starts to pound into Viktor and he can tell how worked up Jayce is already. His pelvis collides with Viktor’s ass and thighs while he carves a home for himself without holding back. The sounds that leave Jayce are hypnotic; a testament to how much he returns that sense of worship Viktor feels. 

His breath is stolen and he jolts when a large hand—Jayce’s left—reaches down and wraps around his throat. There isn’t a worry or care in the world when Jayce presses down on either side of Viktor’s neck, triggering the choking sensation, because Jayce knows what he’s doing. Viktor trusts him implicitly, even when he feels like he can’t breathe and there are tears soaking into his blindfold.

His toes curl as Jayce pistons his hips, the fullness pressing down on his g-spot and cervix. A torrent of unintelligible sounds leave Viktor’s mouth, some resembling curse words in his native tongue, others a spin on ‘Jayce’ or ‘Daddy’, riddled between cries of pleasure. All of it is slightly muted with Jayce’s hand around his throat, the pressure fluctuating with the flex of his fingers. 

His orgasm quickly rushes to him, reaching a boiling point in a short enough time that it might be considered embarrassing, but Viktor could not give a single fuck. Body trembling, mind tingling, pussy squirting—Viktor has an orgasm he could happily write an academic paper about. The afterglow would have to have its own sub-section too because he’s never felt so relaxed and blissed out while getting plowed. He takes it willingly for another minute, his entire body buzzing with euphoria, before Jayce comes with a primal sound that Viktor can only classify as a growl. 

Panting, Jayce presses kisses to Viktor’s shoulder and then his hair for a minute, leaving Viktor feeling warm and, most importantly, cared for. Eventually, Jayce murmurs, “Gonna take your blindfold off, okay, baby?”

Viktor only hums in acknowledgement as Jayce slides the blindfold off of his head, not even bothering to pull out yet. It’s a positive, because Viktor isn’t ready for Jayce to leave. He slowly opens his eyes, vision bleary from the dried tears and sleepy dust clinging to his lashes. The light in his bedroom is dim, daylight pouring in from beneath the blackout curtains, and he turns his head to see the only thing he wants in his field of vision at this moment: Jayce. 

The other man is dishevelled, hair sticking up in several directions, clearly not having brushed it yet. He still looks breathless, droplets of sweat rolling between his pecs as his chest rises and falls, and his glasses are barely still perched on his nose. “Good morning, mi cielo,” Jayce whispers, somewhere between reverent and sweet, as he brushes a lock of hair from Viktor’s face. 

“Mm… Mornin’,” Viktor mumbles, barely audible. He wants nothing more than to curl up in Jayce’s arms right now, after being unbound. Rather than using his words, he weakly lifts his wrists.

Jayce nods. “Gotcha, baby.” With deft, meticulous hands, Jayce quickly unbinds Viktor’s wrists. He decides to finally pull out slowly, prompting Viktor to whine pitifully, before he unbinds his ankles too. Viktor doesn’t need to say or do anything for Jayce to scoop him up in his arms, sitting on the edge of the bed before seating Viktor in his lap. Practically limp in his arms, Viktor rests his head on Jayce’s chest and receives kisses to the crown of his head. “You did so good, angel. You were perfect.”

“Thank you,” Viktor mumbles, wishing Jayce was wearing a t-shirt or something for him to hold on to. He settles for curling into Jayce and enjoys the scent of Jayce’s natural musk. I would crawl under his skin if I could. 

“How about that bath, hm?”

“Mm… ‘d be nice,” he nods, shutting his eyes and listening to Jayce’s heart.

“I have a gift for you, by the way,” Jayce whispers, petting Viktor’s hair again. By now, he knows Viktor loves it.

“Wha’ kind?”

“One I think you could use right now. Would it be okay if I sat you down for a sec?”

“Don’ go far,” he murmurs before Jayce positions him on the bed so he’s sitting upright. Viktor keeps his eyes open, despite how heavy they feel, and watches Jayce open his overnight bag. It’s only then that he notices that Jayce had brought a bigger one this time, and out of it he pulls out a deep red, fuzzy bathrobe. 

“I’ve only worn this a couple times, it’s a little too warm for me, but I thought you might like it. Want to try it on?”

Viktor blinks at him, uncertain what to do with the sentiment. He’s let me keep a couple t-shirts and a sweater already… an entire bathrobe feels like I’m being spoiled. Despite his doubts, he lifts his right arm and Jayce slips the soft, fleecy material on. Moments later, Jayce finishes, and Viktor is now wrapped up in a robe that’s at least two sizes too big for him—just how he likes. A scent catches him off guard though, and he lifts the collar to sniff. Sandalwood. 

“I put a bit of my cologne on the collar. I’ve noticed you seem to like it,” Jayce explains as he sits down next to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. 

“It’s perfect,” Viktor whispers before tucking into Jayce’s side, holding the collar to his nose and indulging in the familiar, comforting scent. Jayce sits and patiently holds him for a few minutes, humming the song he can’t place again, until he’s mostly returned to his body. He’s still tired but filled with bliss when he asks, “Bath now?”

“Yeah, want me to carry you?”

Shaking his head, Viktor says, “I can walk if I can hold on to you.”

“Happy to,” Jayce replies before standing, offering his hand to Viktor. 

Jayce fills the tub with hot water and soap, all while Viktor sits on the toilet seat buried in the oversized robe, before they get in ten minutes later. Viktor relaxes in Jayce’s arms, sighing pleasantly as the heat seeps into his muscles, down to the bone. That feeling of being cared for unlike ever before creeps up on him again while Jayce holds him and presses ginger kisses to his temple. 

“I’ve never had something like this before,” Viktor admits quietly, trying to voice exactly what he’s feeling. “Someone to… take me apart and put me back together. Or pick up the pieces when I’m crumbling. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah.” Pausing, Jayce rests his head against Viktor’s and pauses, brushing his thumb over the heated skin of his chest. “I like being that someone. I’m not trying to say I’m looking to save you or anything like that. It’s just… nice to feel needed and like I can do something right.”

“I like being there for you too… I hope you don’t feel like you can’t open up because I’m… fragile, I guess?”

“You’re not fragile. You’re one of the strongest people I know.”

“You make me feel fragile…”

“That’s just because you stopped masking with me,” Jayce responds, pressing another kiss to his temple. Viktor sighs before humming in acknowledgment, holding on to the arm wrapped around his torso. He remains in Jayce’s arms while he gently cleanses Viktor’s skin with a cloth. Unable to reach everywhere, Viktor at least helps clean Jayce by washing his arms with just as much tenderness. 

Once the water is lukewarm, they get out and Jayce towels him off. After he’s done, he places a kiss square on his forehead before grinning and drying himself. Viktor tries not to act flustered at the small sign of affection but he can’t help the flush on his cheeks. When it comes time to get dressed, Viktor puts on a loose pair of boxers, socks and bundles up in the robe again.

“Whatcha want for breakfast, baby?” Jayce asks once he’s dressed in another pair of basketball shorts and a Pink Floyd muscle shirt.

Now that he’s mostly returned to his body, Viktor has enough mental capacity to pout. “I’m supposed to be taking care of you.”

“You did, it’s my turn to take care of you. Now, what do you want for breakfast?”

“... Banana chocolate chip pancakes.”

“As you wish,” Jayce teases before kissing his cheek. 

God... He even quotes a classic romance film to me. How did I not know this was romantic? A subtle blush touches Viktor’s cheeks as he grabs his crutch and makes his way to the kitchen. “I’m at least feeding Rio.”

“Deal.” 

Rio is screaming at him when he reaches the kitchen. He glances at the coffee maker and reads that it’s only 9:13 am. “Relax, I’m not even fifteen minutes late,” he addresses her before getting to feeding her salmon pate breakfast. After she’s fed, he settles on the couch with his sudoku book while Jayce starts to cook and make coffee.

“Mind if I put some music on?” Jayce asks as he turns the coffee maker on.

“What were you thinking?“ Viktor replies as he grabs one of his pairs of reading glasses from the side table drawer. He’s been needing them more frequently, which is annoying. I’m not brave enough to get lasik, I might just end up a full-time glasses person soon… Jayce makes it look hot though. 

“You like Scissor Sisters?” Glancing over his shoulder, he gapes at Viktor and gasps. “The glasses have made an appearance!”

Arching a brow, Viktor asks, “... Why is that so exciting?” 

“The glasses do it for me. You look like a hot, mean librarian or something.”

Huffing out a laugh, he shakes his head. “You didn’t mention that as a fantasy. To answer your question, just not Magic Hour. I didn’t like that album.”

“I liked it but it’s definitely not as good as their other albums. Night Work is my fave.”

“I really liked Night Work, but Ta-Dah is my favourite.”

“Alright, lemme make a playlist with both and we can shuffle, how ‘bout that?”

“Works for me.”

They get through about ten songs before Jayce finishes breakfast and Viktor joins him at the kitchen table, still dressed in the robe. “Thank you for making breakfast.”

“You’re welcome, angel,” Jayce says, setting down Viktor’s plate and kissing the crown of his head. Viktor’s cheeks warm, feeling flustered still from being taken care of and the pet name. 

It really does feel like he’s my boyfriend. It feels good… which is bad for me. I swore I wouldn’t date anyone while I’m working on my career, which I feel like I’ve hit a wall in. Am I just enjoying it until I’m finally able to move on and focus on my career?

“You okay?” Jayce’s voice cuts through Viktor’s train of thought as he sits down with his own plate, a bottle of maple syrup for him, and a bottle of butter syrup for Viktor. It’s disturbing how well Jayce knows him by now.

“Yeah, just, um… thinking,” Viktor stutters, grabbing the syrup and beginning to coat his pancakes in it. 

“About what?”

“Um… Just… How I feel like I’ve hit a wall in my career,” Viktor partially lies, cutting into one of his pancakes. “My job really feels like a dead end. My boss hates me, I hate him, I’ve sunk my own money into a project that got killed, I haven’t gotten a promotion in almost four years… Sorry, I feel like I’ve been bitching about this for months now. I’m a victim of my own inaction at this point.”

“Hey, hey, you’re not bitching,” Jayce reassures. “You have every right to talk about your issues and you’re not making yourself out to be a victim. You told me you struggle with change—I do too. Hell, I don’t know what I’d do if I wanted to leave my job. I’ve had the same one for almost eight years now. I’d feel fucking lost if I had to move on.”

“... Thank you. That makes me feel better because I’ve been at the University for a decade now. I’ve only had one other job in my industry and that was my internship when I started my PhD,” Viktor says as he chews his bottom lip, picking at his plate. “I’m kind of worried that I… should have left a long time ago. What if the fact that I’ve only ever had three jobs—the bar, my internship, and my current one—will impede me from getting other jobs?”

“Well, as someone who is currently doing hiring, being at one place for a long time is actually a bonus when trying to be appealing to employers.” Pausing to take a bite of his pancakes, Jayce waves his fork in his direction as he speaks again. “Means you’re loyal and, if they hire you, you’re unlikely to leave any time soon.”

“Oh, I hadn’t thought of it that way. It just made me feel inexperienced.” Following Jayce’s example, Viktor focuses on eating.

“I sincerely doubt that you’re inexperienced with the way you talk about your work.”

After three pancakes, a pep talk, and Jayce’s cologne lingering in his nose, Viktor feels a lot better—hopeful even. I know right now I’m waiting for opportunities to come to me, but I’m really going to focus on looking by the new year. I’m committing to it.

They settle down on the couch with the objective of finishing season three of Parks and Rec. Between episodes, Jayce turns to him and asks, ”Hey, since we’re going to the park for sunset, would you wanna eat dinner here, or there? I could make some sandwiches, pack some snacks and drinks in a cooler?”

“You mean like a picnic?” Viktor replies, raising a brow at his companion. That’s a cute date idea… “I would like that. I have an old blanket we can sit on.”

“Hell yeah,” Jayce grins before kissing his hair. 

Fuck, when did all the kisses start being a thing? We used to just make out for horny reasons, now he’s peppering me with affectionate kisses like a hundred times in one day. 

“What kinda sandwiches do you like?” Jayce asks, smoothing a hand over his hair.

“The basics. Ham and cheese, PB and J, or just peanut butter.”

“Classics. How’s ham and cheese sound?”

“Sounds good to me, as long as you’re fine with Kraft Singles.”

“Can’t go wrong with processed American cheese.”

They manage to get through most of season three in the afternoon and Viktor takes a turn preparing food. He makes a simple caesar salad for lunch because it’s what he has and he’s going to need to get groceries soon. Jayce doesn’t complain though. 

It’s 5 pm when Viktor finally takes off the robe and gets dressed properly—after feeding Rio, of course. He dresses casually in a pair of light jeans and a black acid washed Green Day shirt. Voyeuristically, he gets to watch Jayce get dressed in khaki shorts and a navy polo, appreciating the flexing of each muscle. 

When Jayce notices Viktor watching him in the mirror, he grins and turns to him. “You want a ticket to the gun show?”

Snorting and shaking his head, Viktor says, “Were you always this corny of a flirt?” 

“Yep. Worked for me better in sixth grade, though,” Jayce chuckles as he approaches Viktor, placing his hands on his waist. “American Idiot, nice.”

“You don’t think it’s too casual for our date?” I’m done pretending it’s not a date. We've been dating for months. We just haven’t called it dating.

“Nah. You look beautiful as always.”  Squeezing Viktor’s waist, Jayce presses a kiss to his cheek.

“What am I, a nun?” Viktor complains, grabbing Jayce’s jaw and pulling him in for a proper kiss. Jayce doesn’t say anything, just lets out an amused huff through his nose and kisses him back. 

Every kiss with Jayce is spellbinding. He’s always eager and playful, and they have such natural chemistry they can easily read the other’s body language. Jayce’s arms wrap around his waist, holding him tight, while Viktor pets his beard fondly. God, I like him so much… Too much, maybe. I wish I could kiss him like this forever, is all Viktor thinks between a marriage of lips. 

When Jayce pulls away, he has a faint handsome smile on his face. “As much as I enjoy kissing you, we've got a picnic to pack. Let’s get crackin’.”

They pack a cooler with ham and cheese sandwiches, fruit punch juice boxes, water, plain kettle cooked potato chips, green grapes, baby carrots, and mini KitKats he conveniently had. Viktor is aware it’s overkill, but Jayce doesn’t seem to mind and, in fact, supports it. He likes variety, apparently. Viktor is just preparing for any possible cravings. However, he almost forgets one thing—he grabs a bag of frozen peas from his freezer.

“Why you bringin’ peas?” Jayce asks in confusion.

“They’re safe to feed to the ducks,” Viktor explains, adding it to their cooler bag.

Gasping, Jayce’s eyes practically sparkle. “There’s ducks?” 

“Usually, yeah.” 

“I love ducks. There’s a park closer to the east end of Piltover that usually has them—”

“Herald Park, right? That’s where the tent city is, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, you familiar?”

“I went there for some volunteer work that both PA and Zaun U students organized last year. It was the hottest week of the year so we were providing cold water, food, clothes and new tents—all of it was purchased through fundraising, sponsors, and school donations.”

“Wait… I went to that,” Jayce blinks at Viktor. “My company was a sponsor. We donated money and volunteer hours.”

“… What days were you there?”

“Saturday and Sunday.”

“I was there Thursday and Friday.”

“Damn, we could have met earlier… Funny how we’ve missed each other a couple times. Almost feels like fate,” Jayce grins. 

“I don’t believe in fate,” Viktor replies with amusement. 

“Not even a little?”

“No.”

They leave the house a little after six. Viktor brings a red flannel blanket tucked under his arm and his camera bag strapped across his body, while Jayce carries their hefty insulated bag. It’s roughly a ten minute walk before the pond comes into view, and sure enough, there are families of ducks floating on the surface. They lay out the blanket on a patch of flat ground near the edge of the lake, sitting and settling in before Jayce starts to take out the peas and Viktor sets up his camera. 

The sky is painted in beautiful tangerine light, slowly transitioning to dusk. Wanting to capture the sunset at different stages, reflected on the water and looming above the treeline, he snaps his first photo on the fresh roll of film. Jayce has already started to encourage the ducks to come closer, crouching at the water’s edge while he tosses frozen peas into the pond. 

Shifting closer on the blanket, Viktor manages to get a couple of nice shots of Jayce feeding the ducks, his tan skin appearing golden in the sunlight. He’s as handsome as a Greek statue, and Viktor realizes he might have found a new favourite subject when he winks at the camera. Rolling his eyes, though flushing, he turns his lens to the ducks instead, smacking their bills at the water as they try to capture the peas.

“Can I get a picture of the man behind the camera?” Jayce asks, nodding to his Olympus hanging around his neck. “Or do you not trust me with it?”

“I imagine you can figure out ‘don’t drop it’ and ‘press the button’. It’s a pretty standard 50mm lens and you probably won’t need to adjust the aperture,” Viktor says before taking the camera off and holding it out to Jayce by the straps. 

Taking the camera carefully, Jayce holds it up to his face and looks at Viktor through the viewfinder. Viktor has never been good at posing for photos—he apparently has resting bitch face, according to Powder—so he leans to the side on his hand and awkwardly smiles at the camera.

“Someone seems camera shy,” Jayce says, lowering the camera. “School picture day was a nightmare for you, wasn’t it?”

Flushing with embarrassment, Viktor admits, “I faked sick almost every year except when my mom made me go. I have no idea how to pose for a photo.”

“How’d you take that sexy thirst trap, then?”

“Selfies are easier, especially when I’m alone. Plus I took about fifty before I got the perfect one,” he chuckles.

“Okay, just relax your body as much as possible. Don’t tense your shoulders, just chill and get comfortable,” Jayce instructs, clearly being patient with him.

Shifting on the blanket, Viktor eases the muscle tension a little and extends his legs a little more. After he adjusts, he looks back up at the camera, knowing his expression is still uncomfortable. “I don’t know what to do with my face.”

“That’s easy. Just listen to me.”

“Okay…?”

“So, in the fifth grade, I had a crush on this girl in my class named Amanda. She was pretty and popular and I was the weirdo who went to spelling bees and could do magic tricks. But, I started to get really into basketball and I thought, ‘Girls like athletes, right? If I get good at basketball, maybe she’ll notice me’.”

Viktor giggles a little and faster than he can perceive, Jayce snaps a picture. Then it clicks. “You’re trying to make me laugh, aren’t you?”

“Yep. My best friend is bad at posing for photos too so I always get her to laugh,” Jayce grins. “I think we can get a better one than that, though. So, continuing the story, I practiced for weeks. I was waiting for the right moment for me to show off my new skills, and I got the chance when our gym teacher had us play one day. Except, I forgot my gym clothes that day.”

“Oh no… This ends in disaster, doesn’t it?”

“Oh, baby, you have no idea. There I was, dressed in jeans and a Spider-Man t-shirt, doing my best which wasn’t great. Most of the time, people wouldn’t pass to me, because I was the loser of my grade. But finally, someone passed me the ball and I had an opening. I jumped, threw the ball…”

“I’m on the edge of my seat.”

“Not only did I miss, but my pants ripped and I flashed the whole class my Scooby-Doo boxers. Amanda had a prime seat in the audience to watch and, the cherry on top, I didn’t stick the landing. I tripped and fell flat on my face.”

Viktor can’t help it now, he’s laughing and Jayce is getting at least a couple of shots out of it. “That’s awful,” he empathizes between giggles. “I would have withered up and died.”

“Yeah, that’s how I felt. After that day, she remembered me and smiled at me when she saw me—for the wrong reasons.” Handing the camera back to Viktor, Jayce grins at him. “Anyways, that’s one of my tales of elementary school trauma.”

“I might’ve been charmed by your undergarments, if it makes you feel any better. I loved Scooby-Doo.”

“Me too, hence the boxers.” The corners of Jayce’s eyes crinkle as he smiles fondly at Viktor. “You’re beautiful, especially when you smile, y’know that?”

Unable to fight off the blush invading his cheeks, Viktor turns his head away. “You’re just saying that.”

“Not at all,” Jayce says before crawling across the blanket to sit next to Viktor. Their legs are pressed together as Jayce places a hand on his lower back. “Look at me, mi cielo.”

Viktor dares to look at Jayce, and butterflies begin to emerge from their chrysalises attached to his stomach lining when he sees the other man’s gorgeous hazel eyes shining like peridots in the evening sun. Cradling Viktor’s jaw, Jayce looks at him with such earnestness that Viktor can do nothing but believe what he has to say.

“You’re beautiful. One of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen—if not the most. And I don’t just like your pretty face and body. You make me want to worship you like a deity with how sexy, smart, witty and genuine you are,” Jayce continues softly, brushing his thumb over Viktor’s cheekbone. All at the same time, Viktor feels as though he can’t breathe, the oxygen stolen away by a confession that leaves him at a loss for words. “I’ve never met anyone like you before.”

He likes me. This is not just a situationship. He likes me. And I like him. Fuck. How did I get here?

Viktor is silent for a long moment as the butterflies flail wildly inside his gut, trying to find his breath and voice. “I… I haven’t met anyone like you before either. Someone who makes me feel… cherished.”

“I do. I cherish you,” Jayce murmurs before leaning in. Viktor meets him halfway for a tender kiss, holding Jayce’s face in his hands. And then suddenly, Jayce is lying him down on the blanket and hovering above him, continuing the kiss a little more heated. Licking into his mouth, Viktor wraps his arms around Jayce’s neck and brushes his fingers over his nape. 

“Get a room!” A kid yells, maybe not older than thirteen. When they part and look over, Viktor and Jayce see three kids laughing while they bike away.

After a moment of silence, Viktor glances at Jayce, whose irises meet his at the same time, and they both start laughing. Barely contained, unable-to-stifle, unapologetic laughter. 

“I think a park is a little too public for me,” Jayce jokes before pressing one more kiss to Viktor’s lips, who’s still giggling by the time their lips meet. 

They spend the next two hours cycling between eating, chatting, photographing, and feeding ducks. It isn’t until after 9 pm, once the sky is painted in dark pinks and blues, that they head back to Viktor’s. Rio eagerly greets them at the door and, like the traitor she is, rubs up against Jayce’s legs first. 

Much to Viktor’s disappointment, Jayce has to start packing up to go home. When Viktor escorts him to the door, they both gravitate into each other’s space, wrapping their arms around one another. Viktor buries his nose in Jayce’s clavicle, taking in his scent. 

“I’ll miss you, mi cielo,” Jayce murmurs in his hair, pressing kisses there.

My darling. 

“I’ll miss you too, můj miláčku,” Viktor murmurs against his skin, reluctant to let go. Tilting his head up, Viktor waits for Jayce to get the hint to kiss him. He barely needs to hint at it though because Jayce immediately leans in and captures Viktor’s lips. The kiss is leisurely and lingering, and an ache makes a home in Viktor’s ribcage. I keep wondering what it would be like to have him like this all the time. That way I wouldn’t have to miss him so much.

“Have a good week, angel,” Jayce says when he breaks the kiss.

“Yeah, you too. Good luck with the hiring, by the way.” Stepping back and grabbing his crutch from the wall, he opens the door for Jayce. 

“Thanks, I need it.” With a chuckle and one more kiss to Viktor’s forehead, Jayce heads out.

It’s only after Jayce leaves that Viktor finally recalls the song Jayce had been humming before.

Songbird by Fleetwood Mac.

Viktor has two batches of developed photos done by Wednesday. He really likes the landscape photos of the sunset over the pond that he had taken with his new lens. Plus, the photos that Jayce and Viktor took of each other are really… cute. He has to admit that the pictures Jayce took of him turned out really well—he doesn’t look awkward for once.

By making two, the intention was to give Jayce a set. However, he has no idea if Jayce would even want that. So, he snaps a couple photos of his favourite shots and sends Jayce a text. 

Wednesday 9:24 PM

V 💕
[attached images]
A few of my favourites from this weekend.
I have duplicates, would you want them?

J ❤️‍🔥
baby they look amazing!!!
yes pls
i’m gonna frame that sunset photo
and prob one of the ducks tbh
they were so fuckin cute

V 💕
Alright, I’ll give them to you this weekend.

J ❤️‍🔥
can i take u out for dinner fri night?
somewhere nice

V 💕
You can.
I know a really nice Italian place downtown.
I’m talking fancy pizza and pasta.
And expensive wine lists.

J ❤️‍🔥
sounds good to me 🍕🍷❤️

V 💕
You know you don’t have to though, right?
I’m not looking for a sugar daddy.
Just a regular one.

J ❤️‍🔥
i know
i just like treatin u bc u deserve it

V 💕
I appreciate that. But I’m pretty sure I could have fun with you eating cold pizza in the Chuck E. Cheese parking lot, behind a dumpster.

J ❤️‍🔥
i take that as a compliment of the highest regard
we could always test that theory 😘🐀

V 💕
Why are you kissing a rat?
You’re supposed to only kiss me. 🥀

J ❤️‍🔥
omg i’m not 
😂❤️😘🥰
🙅🏽‍♂️🐀

Chapter Text

Friday, July 10th, 2020

Tuesday 10:15 AM

J ❤️‍🔥
u free this fri? 🌹

V 💕
Can’t. I already have plans. 🥀

J ❤️‍🔥
how bout sat?

V 💕
Depends how I feel. I’ll text you Saturday morning. 

J ❤️‍🔥
k lmk
miss u angel 😘

V 💕
Miss you. ❤️

“Are you ready to go, boss?” Powder says at 5:13 pm. She’s bouncing back and forth on each foot, expending some of her nervous energy, as she is known to do.

He’s finishing filing a report for the stakeholders. He’s still bored and bitter about their nanomachine project. Viktor resents the new dean for being pro-military and pro-police, despite Piltover PD’s history of brutality against Zaunites. It feels… soulless. He misses when they were focused on research into improved limb prosthetics. It feels like I’ve been complaining about it for the last eight months and doing nothing about it. “One minute, Powder.”

“C’mon, Vik, you promised you’d be done by five! It’s already past ten after!” Powder huffs as she crosses her arms. 

Sighing heavily, he looks up at her from his desk. “I know, but I can’t control this. Don’t you have something you could occupy yourself with while I finish this? Your Switch, maybe?” 

“Ugh. Fine,” she groans in defeat, sitting down in one of the chairs sideways, opposite of his own, so she’s leaning on one arm and has her legs thrown over the other. Even though she’s dressed business casual in a light blue sleeveless blouse, her tattoo sleeves on display, and black, wide-legged pants with flats, she still has the energy of the same teenager he knew years ago. She pulls out her Switch from her large, blue, pink and green knit purse and starts playing what Viktor is pretty sure is the Zelda game she’s been telling him about.

It takes him another ten minutes to wrap up the report and send it via email, and both his and Powder’s phones vibrate just as he’s done. It’s presumably their group chat.

Friday 5:24 PM

Sky 💫 
Hey, I’m running a little late. I should be there in like, fifteen minutes?

Pow 🦋
take ur time, mr. boring decided to do his job or w/e

Vik 🐐
Mr. Boring is your boss, need I remind you?
We should be there around the same time, Sky.

Pow 🦋
🤭

Sky 💫 
Okay, see you then Powder & Mr. Boring 🥱 

Vik 🐐
Don’t enable her.
😒

First stop on their night out is their favourite ramen restaurant in the Lanes. They would’ve invited Vi but she decided to get dinner with her bandmates before the show. Sky is already waiting at a table for them when Powder and Viktor arrive, waving at them. The walk to the restaurant was only ten minutes from the University campus so Viktor didn’t bother driving. He only stopped by his car to drop off his laptop bag and to ditch his neck and hair ties.

“Hey, how was your week?” Sky asks once they sit down.

Viktor lets out a sigh. “Mediocre at best.”

“Rough since I’ve spent all week with Mr. Grumpy Pants over here,” Powder nods at Viktor.

“Am I Mr. Grumpy Pants or Mr. Boring? Make up your mind.”

“You have many aliases.”

“Did you not hook up with the nerdy hunk this past weekend?” Sky asks, propping her head up with her hands.

Viktor narrows his eyes at Sky. “Why do you say that?”

"You've seemed extra moody is all,” she shrugs.

“Oh, trust me, I can tell he didn’t. He was miserable on Tuesday, and after a long weekend no less!” Powder exclaims. 

“I… I’m not that transparent, am I?” Viktor asks with mild embarrassment. 

Almost simultaneously, both Sky and Powder say ‘yep’.

Viktor’s face heats up as he averts his eyes. “Okay, yeah, he was busy for the July 4th weekend. A work barbecue then a family barbecue apparently. Plus he’s still really busy.”

“Okay, I don’t mean to push again, but why aren’t you dating him?” Sky asks.

“Because he doesn’t want a boyfriend,” Viktor says simply. There’s a long pause and he looks between his friends who are staring at him intently. “What?”

“You said he doesn’t want a boyfriend. You didn’t say you didn’t, which you’ve maintained for the last nine months.” Sky points out.

Powder pipes up, “Yeah it’s almost as though Vik’s full of shit.”

Viktor’s face flushes and he starts to panic. “I-I meant, neither of us want a boyfriend.”

“Buuuuullshit,” Powder says with a roll of her eyes. “Have you even asked him about the boyfriend thing recently or are you just assuming that based on what he told you when you first met?”

Chewing on his lip, Viktor begins to fidget with his fingers. “I haven’t asked him about it. There’s no point. I’m just convenient for him.”

“Convenient would be saying ‘you up’ at 11 pm on a Saturday and going at most fifteen minutes away. He lives a half hour away and comes for entire weekends, doesn’t he? You think a dude who works full time, and overtime, would spend his entire weekend with a dude who is just his booty call? Haven’t you guys basically been dating?”

“I mean… we’re not dating. We hang out and sometimes we go out.”

“Uh huh. Where was the last place you went out together?”

Viktor thinks back to two weeks ago, the last time he saw Jayce. “Um… we, uh… we went out for pizza.”

“Like Papa John’s or are we talking fancy pizza?”

“I… Well, I took him to Massimo’s. Or, more accurately, he took me because he paid.” 

“Massimo’s? You mean the most fancy-pants Italian restaurant in the Lanes?”

“Listen, it’s not a big deal—”

“Vik, that’s a date spot and he paid,” Sky adds, backing up Powder. “You’re dating.”

Groaning, Viktor buries his face in his hands. “… I’m in too deep, aren’t I?”

“You like him, dude. Just lock him down already,” Powder insists.

“I don’t think that’s going to happen. I think… maybe I should stop seeing him.”

“Viktor,” Sky cuts in, clearly sounding chastising. “You can’t just run from your feelings. He probably likes you just as much. Wouldn’t it be nice to stop dancing around him and make things official? I mean… as hurtful as it was, you did spend the anniversary with him. Doesn’t that mean something?” 

The memory of Jayce taking care of him at his lowest resurfaces. He was so caring, and gentle, and answered every need Viktor had. It makes a gust of butterflies fly in the pit of his stomach, almost causing him to feel ill. “I… I just… I don’t know if I’m ready. It’s too soon—”

“It’s been nine months, dude!” Powder exclaims, which is when a waiter shows up at their table to take their order. It’s like he’s been spared from the mortifying conversation about his feelings for Jayce. Powder agreed she’d leave it alone months ago, but the comments about his relationship with Jayce have begun to resurface again. She might have a point to be so insistent, but it’s not happening.

Once they’ve ordered and the waiter has walked away, Viktor tries to steer clear of the previous topic. “How was your week, Sky? I didn’t get to ask.”

“My week was just fine but don’t think you’re getting away with pretending like the conversation didn’t just happen. It’s starting to sound like you’re in a situationship.”

Viktor groans again, folding his arms on the tabletop and hiding his face in them. “I know. I had that realization a few weeks ago,” Viktor says before peeking out from his arms. “He basically called me ‘my darling’ in Spanish. I wasn’t supposed to know, I googled it and he doesn’t know I know.”

“Oh shit,” Powder mutters in thought. “It sounds like he is your boyfriend without saying he’s your boyfriend.”

“I agree,” Sky says, wisely continuing to say, “You need to have the talk.”

“I am not having a ‘what are we’ conversation with him. I’m just going to… see him until I hit a breaking point.”

Sky frowns and chastises, “You know that’s not healthy.”

“I’ve never claimed to be healthy.”

“Why are you being such a goat about this, dude? Like, what’s the worst that can happen? He dumps your ass?” Powder asks as she folds her arms.

“He dies,” Viktor says bluntly. “I’d rather not know him and not love him when that inevitably happens.”

“… So you admit you love him?” Sky asks cautiously.

“No. That wasn’t my point. My point is I’m not going to let myself get in that deep. I’ll have ended it long before that,” Viktor says with an, admittedly, immature crossing of his arms. “Can we please drop it?”

“Alright, alright, Mr. Grumpy Pants,” Powder waves him off.

“Girl, did you get your nails done or did you do that yourself?” Sky says nodding to Powder’s deep blue nails with fireworks on them, easily changing the subject.

“Hell no, I couldn’t do this myself! I got them done for the Fourth, aren’t they cute? You know I ain’t patriotic, that’s why I had my gal put some green in there, but I fuck with things that explode,” Powder says, showing them off to Sky. With a sigh, she continues, “My other concept was to make them look like hot dogs but she insisted this was a better idea.”

“That was probably for the best,” Sky laughs. 

Their conversation flows naturally, now thankfully off of Jayce and on mundane things like celebrity gossip, which Viktor is merely a spectator of, their significant others, his cat, and what they’re currently watching. Viktor says he’s rewatching Parks and Rec again, but leaves out that it’s his and Jayce’s thing now. His pork tonkotsu ramen is delicious as always, and Powder’s is so spicy the smell alone leaves Viktor’s nose tingling. And, lastly, they decide to pre-game with some sake and ice cream mochi. 

The Last Drop is only a five minute walk from the restaurant, and Viktor is grateful because his hip is beginning to bother him. They lingered at the restaurant for almost two hours, so it’s already 7:30 by the time they reached the bar. 

It’s a little early for the bar to be so busy, only a few regulars in a couple of the booths in anticipation for tonight’s performance. They immediately see Vi standing at the bar, talking to Vander and Silco. Quietly, Powder sneaks up on Vi then throws her arms around her big sister. “What up, rock star!”

Vi jumps before laughing and turning around. She squeezes her sister and even lifts her off the ground. “Just gettin’ a little pre-show pep talk, like I haven’t done this like a hundred times already.”

Viktor slides into one of the bar seats and Sky follows him. “How’s politics treating you, Sil?” He asks.

“Yeah, I read the council is actually passing your bill to raise the minimum wage above state-level for Piltover and Zaun,” Sky adds.

“It has been slow going but, finally, I have managed to get enough councillors on my side,” Silco nods, smiling with pride. “I’ve been trying to get this bill passed for four years. It’s nice to finally see it come to fruition.” 

“How’d you do it? I thought the councillors were all laughing in your face at the idea,” Viktor quirks a brow.

“One word: Elections,” Silco smirks. “Some of the less… forward thinking councillors didn’t continue for another term.”

“Oh. I didn’t pay attention to Piltover’s new councillors, I was just making sure you got another term,” Viktor chuckles.

“Shouldn’t you be paying attention to Piltover’s politics too?” Sky asks, raising her brows at him.

He shrugs. “I was too busy moping to look into who got elected.”

“Mayor Kiramman seems to be interested in making change,” Silco replies, folding his arms over the bar. “At first I wasn’t sure about her. She comes from Piltover high society, after all. But, her heart does seem to be in the right place. I had lunch with her last week and she was, at least to my face, open to my ideas. You never know with politicians though,” he drawls. “Especially Piltie politicians.” 

“As long as you’re keeping on your toes,” Sky nods.

“My Sil does nothing but keep on his toes in the council room,” Vander joins the conversation, pulling Vi and Powder in too, as he claps a large hand on his husband’s slender shoulder. “We’ll have to have a little celebration when the bill does pass—because it will.”

“Hell yeah! Let’s get Pops blasted,” Powder adds, pumping her fists.

“We love drunk Silco!” Vi joins, also punching the air.

“Agreed, drunk Silco needs to make an appearance,” Viktor laughs, grinning at his pseudo-father. “Three against one.”

“I will not be peer pressured by my children,” Silco says indignantly.

“Drunk Silco… Drunk Silco…” Vander starts to chant next to him, Powder and Vi joining in immediately. And within moments, Viktor and Sky are joining in too.

“Alright, alright! I will have a few drinks to celebrate,” Silco concedes, waving his hands. “I will not have a repeat of my fiftieth birthday, though.”

All of them are grinning mischievously, earning a roll of his eyes.

“Alright, fam, I gotta go get ready,” Vi cuts through the conversation. “Wish me luck!”

They all wish her luck in varying volume levels and enthusiasm, Powder being the loudest. Once she’s gone, Vander asks, “Alright, what can I get you kids?”

“My usual,” Viktor says.

“Hm… I think I’ll have a strawberry daiquiri,” Sky follows.

“I want the spiciest cocktail ya got!” Powder exclaims.

“You got it. Go sit at booth three and I’ll bring over your drinks.”

One drink turns into three as him, Powder and Sky chat about whatever comes to mind. A lot of it is discussing recent books they’ve read, Powder and Ekko’s new kitten, and Jax’s latest research observing dwarf planets. It’s been over an hour before Viktor has to find the bathroom. He’s gone maybe five minutes before he starts heading back to the booth, but something—or someone—catches his eye.

“Jayce?” Viktor calls when he sees the back of the man’s head—or at least he thinks it’s him. Sure enough, Jayce turns to see Viktor, immediately looking surprised. He’s handsome as always, dressed in a pink polo and light jeans, which says he didn’t come straight here from work.

“Vik! What, uh… what are you doing here?” The smile Jayce gives him is a little uncertain, like he’s nervous.

“I was about to ask you the same. I’m having drinks with my friends.”

“Oh! Same. Birthday drinks, plus the music. My birthday, that is,” Jayce adds, finally looking Viktor up and down. Other than untucking his brown and beige pinstriped dress shirt, undoing a couple of buttons and taking off his tie, Viktor is the one who looks like he just came from work for once.

I shouldn’t ask. I shouldn’t prod. “Is it today?” Kurva.

“No, it was on Tuesday.”

“Happy birthday, then.”

“When, um… when’s yours?”

I shouldn’t indulge him, I shouldn’t— “December 29th.” 

“Oh, damn, awkward time for a birthday, isn’t it?”

“Eh, I like it. I’m usually killing two birds with one stone for Christmas,” Viktor shrugs, leaning against the bar next to Jayce while setting his crutch aside.

Jayce hums, smiling softly, “In that case, I guess we sorta celebrated your birthday last year. I did see you on Christmas Eve and New Years, after all.” 

“I guess you did, yes. Were you trying to hook up this weekend for your birthday?”

“That was the idea. It’s inconvenient to have a birthday so close to the Fourth, so I usually celebrate the weekend after.”

Vander chooses that moment to approach them at the bar and says, “Haven’t seen you two here together in a while. Vik, do you want another round for you and the girls?”

“Yes, please. And we’re not together, just… running into each other,” Viktor replies, giving him a pointed look that hopefully says don’t make this a big deal.

“Sure, sure,” Vander returns with an amused tone. He’s not letting this go. He’s been poking and prodding me about Jayce again. “What about you, Jayce? Another round for you and your friend?”

Ah. Friend. Singular. Could this be a date? There’s a deep, familiar shadow of jealousy brewing in his chest. The idea of Jayce being on a date bothers him, but he reminds himself of the conversation they had a few weeks ago. Jayce had assured him he wasn’t interested in seeing anyone else. I need to trust him. He wouldn’t lie to me. Unless this whole loverboy thing is an act and he’s stringing me—no, no, Jayce is honest. He wouldn’t do that.

“Yes, please,” Jayce says before Vander leaves. Turning to Viktor, Jayce’s eyes flicker down at his lips as he licks his own, before locking eyes with him. “I have leftover birthday cake back at my place. You, ah… you wouldn’t want to come over and have a slice with me tonight, would you?”

Viktor blinks before laughing. “That’s the worst way you’ve tried to pick me up yet and you started with ‘come here often?’” Okay, so it’s not a date. Relief washes over him, which also worries him.

“Well, okay, yes. I’m trying to subtly get you to come home with me, but I also know what a sweet tooth you have,” Jayce grins, reaching over and placing a hand on Viktor’s free elbow. His touch is magnetized and Viktor just wants to fall into his arms. 

“Jayce, what’s taking so long?” A woman with dark blue hair wearing a short black dress with shoulder sleeves approaches, glancing at Viktor then back at Jayce. “Am I interrupting you flirting when you’re supposed to be hanging out with me?”

Awkwardly, Jayce laughs and retracts his hand. “Uh, kinda. This is… um… Cait, this is Viktor.” 

The woman—Cait—looks between Jayce and Viktor for a moment before recognition lights up in her eyes. “Oh. That Viktor.”

Oh. Jayce talks about me. Huh. Viktor doesn’t know why, but that fact makes a warmth tingle through his body—something akin to pride.

“Yes, that Viktor,” Jayce says, a tint of pink on his cheeks. 

At that moment, Vander swings by with Jayce and Cait’s drinks—an IPA and a bellini. “Here you are, Jayce. Vik, Sil took your drinks over to the table.”

“Thanks, Vander,” Viktor nods. 

Handing Vander a tip, Jayce says, “Yeah, thanks.” He then turns to his friend and says, “Do you think you could take our drinks?”

“Sure,” she smiles slyly before leaning in and whispering in his ear. Jayce turns red and playfully smacks her arm. 

“Cait!”

Oh. It’s like a sibling thing. I see. The relief that he has no one to compete with—not that he’s competing—eases the intense feelings he was having in his chest before.

“What? Just telling it like it is,” she giggles like a villain and Viktor already kind of likes her. “It was nice meeting you, Viktor. Jayce, don’t be long, the show is starting soon.”

Jayce huffs as she walks away, shaking his head. “My best friend. She’s like my sister.”

“I can tell,” Viktor says, amused. “Now… What was that about cake?”

Chuckling, Jayce nods. “You down? Cait just agreed to come here because she really likes the band—well, really she’s thirsting after one person.”

“Oh, really? My friend’s in the band.”

“No way, who?”

“Vi, the lead guitarist and vocalist.”

“Stop. That’s exactly who she’s got a crush on.”

“Interesting. I can’t say Cait’s not her type, to be honest. I don’t know how she feels about… groupies, though.”

“Think you can introduce them and see if sparks fly?” 

“Maybe. To answer your question, yes I would like to go back to your place,” Viktor says before pulling out his phone and glancing at the time. 9:18 pm. “The set is starting in twelve minutes. It should be done by 11. Meet me by the stage with your friend at ten after and I’ll introduce them. Then we can get out of here.”

“Yes, sir,” Jayce nods with a slight smirk. “Have I told you how hot you are with glasses?”

“Yes, many times.” Viktor is planning to turn away before he has a sudden urge to kiss Jayce—all because of a possessive feeling that overcomes him. He glances around, checking to see if Sky, Vi, or Powder are in sight. Grabbing Jayce’s collar, Viktor drags him down and kisses him hard. Jayce makes a noise of surprise before instinctively pulling Viktor closer by his waist, returning the kiss with just as much fervour. Boldly, Viktor bites Jayce’s bottom lip, receiving a groan in response, while the other man’s hands wander further down to grab Viktor’s ass. Just as he’s about to dip his tongue in Jayce’s mouth, Viktor hears, “Vik!?”

Suddenly pulling away from Jayce, Viktor looks over his shoulder to see Powder there, staring at them. “Uh… I’m, um, coming back,” he says as he clears his throat.

“You said you were going to the bathroom and ordering us a round, not going to make out with—oh, it’s him,” Powder cuts herself off, looking less bothered now that she recognizes Jayce. 

“Uh… hi again,” Jayce says awkwardly, waving at Powder. “I promise I’ll free him in a minute.”

“Uh huh,” Powder rolls her eyes. “Whatever, just be back by the time Vi’s on stage.” With that, Powder thankfully walks away.

“Sorry, am I keeping you?” Jayce chuckles, looking back down at Viktor.

“No. I kissed you, dumbass,” Viktor huffs out a laugh before dragging the other man down again, immediately vying for entrance into Jayce’s mouth. Jayce willingly gives, his tongue meeting his eagerly while caressing Viktor’s jaw. Looping his arms around Jayce’s neck, Viktor allows himself to get swept away by the kiss, turning his head to lick into his mouth. He’s taken off guard when Jayce starts to dip him to the side, supporting Viktor’s weight by his waist and nape. Breaking the kiss to giggle, Viktor looks up at Jayce fondly. “You’re corny, you know that?” 

With a grin, Jayce replies, “So you’ve told me.” Closing what little distance there is between them, Jayce continues to kiss him, firmly and passionately. Viktor’s fingers comb through his hair before Jayce pulls him back up until he’s standing straight again. They continue to kiss until cheers start emanating from the crowd and when Viktor’s eyes open, he notices the floor lights have dimmed and the show is about to start. “Shit, okay, I’ll actually let you go now. I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah, see you at ten after,” Viktor agrees before reaching up and pressing one more kiss to Jayce’s lips. 

“Hasta pronto, mi cielo,” Jayce murmurs, just barely breaking through the drone of cheers, caressing Viktor’s cheek tenderly.

There it is again. My heaven. “Brzy se uvidíme, můj miláčku,” Viktor replies against his better judgement. Despite every fiber of his being not wanting to leave Jayce, he breaks away after placing a kiss on the palm that stroked his cheek.

Drums begin to echo in the bar when Viktor finally makes it back to their table, where both Sky and Powder greet him with suspicious looks. “What?”

“You were gone a while,” Sky comments casually.

Viktor rolls his eyes. “I wasn’t expecting him to be here is all.”

“Uh huh. And you just had to put your tongue down his throat?” Powder teases. “For a second, I thought you might be cheating.”

“Wha—I’m not a cheater, how dare you—”

“Ah-ha! So you admit if you hooked up with another guy you’d be cheating on nerdy hunk!”

“No! It wouldn’t be cheating because we’re not exclusive—I mean, we are but not like that—” 

The curtains part and now Vi’s on stage, pink hair spiked in a faux hawk, holding her black and red guitar and wearing leather head to toe—black leather pants and a red leather vest over a black crop top. She rifts her guitar and calls into the mic, “What’s up Zaun!? How y’all feelin’ tonight!?” The crowd cheers, not excluding Viktor, because the whole reason he’s there is to support Vi. Vander hollers from the bar over the crowd with his booming voice. “Good, ‘cuz I’m feelin’ just as fuckin’ good. This first one’s called ‘Fist’! One, two, three…”

After saying goodbye to Sky and Powder, and rejecting their insistence that Jayce is his boyfriend, Viktor makes his way to the stage exit door next to the stage. He’s only waiting maybe a minute before he spots Jayce’s pink polo. 

“Hey,” Viktor greets when Jayce walks up to him with Cait, a small smile on his lips. He wants to kiss Jayce again, but in the middle of introducing his friend to Viktor’s adopted sister might not be the most appropriate time.

“Hey,” Jayce returns and casually presses a kiss to the crown of Viktor’s head, placing a hand on his lower back. We must look like a couple, Viktor thinks and, despite the terrifying thought, he leans into Jayce’s side. Cait is giving them an… interesting look, like she knows something Viktor doesn’t. He doesn’t have time to dissect the glance before Vi is coming out of the backstage door and spots him. 

“Hey dude! How’d you like the show?” She grins at him, ignoring Jayce and Cait at first. It doesn’t last long though, because she points at Jayce. “Whoa, hold on, is this your boyfriend?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Viktor corrects, but he doesn’t move away from Jayce’s side. “Yes, I enjoyed the show. I actually wanted to introduce you to Cait,” he pauses to gesture to the woman standing a couple feet away. She smiles nervously and fidgets with her bracelet. “She’s a big fan.”

“Oh, sick, what’s up? I’m Vi—but you probably know that,” his sister replies with a cocky smirk. Viktor rolls his eyes because Vi is not subtle at all when she finds a woman attractive. Guess that answers the groupie question. 

“Oh, I just, um… I really enjoyed your show. This is my third time seeing you live,” Cait replies, tucking her hair behind her ear. 

“Okay, I think my job is done,” Viktor states, looking up at Jayce. “Want to get out of here?”

“Yeah,” Jayce agrees, turning to Cait. “I’m heading home, you good by yourself?”

Cait scoffs. “I’m twenty-eight, I can handle myself.”

“Alright, alright. I’ll see you later, Sprout.” 

Cait and Vi say their goodbyes to them and immediately gravitate back to each other. “I’d say that was successful,” Jayce whispers in his ear, holding onto his waist while they leave the bar. 

“Eh, we barely needed to do anything. When Vi sees a girl she likes, she has a very one-track-mind.” 

“I can get the Uber this time,” Jayce offers as they make their way to the entrance. It’s dark and stormy, rain pitter-pattering against the concrete sidewalk. Tapping away at his phone for a few moments, he then looks back up at Viktor and grins. “Y’know… This feels nostalgic.”

“Yeah? You picking me up at The Last Drop?” Viktor smirks before looking down at their outfits. “It’s a bit of a role reversal. I’m the one dressed for the office and we’re going back to yours.”

“I guess I can’t help but associate this place with meeting you.” 

Stepping closer and tugging Jayce’s collar gently, Viktor bites his bottom lip then replies, “Wanna make out in the back seat, you know, for old time’s sake?”

“Oh, you don’t need to convince me,” Jayce chuckles before taking hold of Viktor’s jaw with one hand, cradling him while kissing him tenderly.

Melting into the kiss, Viktor returns it and the world disappears. The other chatting patrons trickling out of the bar, the drone of the pouring rain, and the passing cars all become distant white noise. He’s kissing me like I matter, Viktor thinks to himself as his hand skirts over Jayce’s neck to pet his nape. He doesn’t know how long they’re wrapped up in their embrace, but Jayce pulls away in a panic when his phone pings. 

“Shit, the Uber,” he says in a rush, reaching into his pocket for his phone. “Oh, good, they’re pulling up. You ready to go, baby?”

“Yeah, can I—”

Before Viktor even has to say it, Jayce holds out his arm for Viktor to take. He snakes his right arm around Jayce’s left and they start to speed walk to the SUV pulled up to the curb about thirty feet away. Jayce opens the back door and gestures for Viktor to get in first. He’s only marginally wet when he slides into the back seat, but Jayce’s polo is stained darker around the shoulders when he gets in. 

“Hey man, I promise I’m going to give you a huge tip because me and my date here are going to make out,” Jayce says when he gets settled in. “Is that cool?”

“Uh… Sure, man, whatever?” The driver says in a Jersey accent. 

“Cool.”

Jayce makes good on his promise and Viktor’s lips feel bruised by the time they get to Jayce’s condo. Their glasses kept bumping together to the point where Viktor decided to perch his own on his head just to get them out of the way. Like he said, Jayce gives the guy a $80 tip—fair considering the half-hour drive and the excessive swapping of spit. 

The sex, as usual, is amazing. Because they’re not at Viktor’s place, they’re down an option for positions, but they do better than make due. Jayce lies them on their sides, back to chest, and fucks him soft and slow while holding Viktor firmly. Kisses are pressed to the shell of his ear, nape and side of his neck, while his fingers lazily rub Viktor’s cock. Jayce murmurs ‘mi cielo’ again and again. It’s tender, more tender than Viktor thinks he deserves, and the orgasm that follows makes him feel like the whole world is swimming in the darkness. Jayce rolls him over so they can kiss leisurely in the afterglow, and Viktor pets his hair affectionately, earning pleasant sighs and hums as he does. 

They stay in bed for a half-hour, kissing, touching and whispering. Jokes and funny stories are shared in the quiet of the night and Viktor is so full of care and affection that he doesn’t know what to do with the feeling. He is, in fact, in too deep, but he ignores the fear and embraces Jayce’s attention and sweet nothings. It isn’t until after 1 am when they finally decide to get out of bed for dessert.

Viktor doesn’t have his overnight bag like usual, so Jayce gets him a Hulk t-shirt and the tightest pair of sweatpants he owns, which fortunately don’t fall off of Viktor when he walks. Dressed in a pair of green plaid pyjama pants and a white tank top, Jayce retrieves the two slices of leftover cake from his fridge and they sit on his black leather sofa. 

“First bite’s yours,” Jayce offers, holding a fork out to Viktor. 

Viktor takes it and has a bite of the rich chocolate cake, humming in delight. “That’s really fucking good. Where’d you get it from?”

“My mom made it. I had dinner with her on Wednesday because I had an investor meeting that ran over on my actual birthday.”

Investor meeting? What the hell does he do? That piques Viktor’s interest but Viktor has a strict rule about not sharing or finding out what they do for work—or more than he already has. That’s one boundary he’s not crossing with Jayce. However, Viktor has one question he is willing to ask, which he approaches when they’re halfway through the cake. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, shoot.”

“Why is your apartment still so…” Viktor searches for the right word to say but Jayce beats him to it. 

“Cold? Impersonal? Lifeless?” Jayce’s eyes twinkle with amusement as he takes a bite of the cake.

“I wasn’t going to be so blunt, but yes. Other than your wall of records, it looks like you barely live here.”

“You? Worried about being blunt? That’s unlike you,” Jayce chuckles. “It’s fine, it’s not rude or anything, I’m very aware of what my place looks like.”

“So… why?”

Wordlessly, Jayce holds his hand out for Viktor’s fork and, with confusion, Viktor hands it over. Jayce sets the container with the cake and forks on the coffee table and stands. “Follow me.”

Nodding, Viktor grabs his crutch and follows Jayce to the door opposite of his bedroom, the one Viktor’s never been in. He assumed it was a guest bedroom but he's not expecting what’s inside. There’s a large, beat up and stained L-shaped desk in the back corner, and a cozy, worn green chair in another corner with a table piled with books next to a bookcase. Other than the sparse furniture, there’s two easels set up, both with large in-progress paintings on them. The walls are plastered in art—sketches, paintings of acrylic, oil, watercolour and wax, and a shelf with small metal sculptures. There’s a large storage unit too with every kind of art supply in drawers, on shelves, and a collection of blank canvases piled against the wall. 

“So, this is where you’ve been hiding…” Viktor murmurs, a comment meant to be to himself but Jayce clearly hears it.

“Yeah, the rest of the apartment is just functional. I keep meaning to, uh, make it more homey, but if I’m not at work or the gym, this is where I spend most of my time,” Jayce says with a sheepish smile. “I usually have a couple of things on the go so I can jump around. It’s the ADHD.” 

He makes so much more sense now. 

“May I… look around?” Viktor is hesitant because he doesn’t want to overstep but he’s so curious about what's on the canvases.

“I mean, yeah, go ahead.” 

The room is lit by moonlight spilling in from the glass wall opposite to where the canvases are set up. Walking around, Viktor gets a good look at them. One is portrait orientation and seems to be a painting of a man. It’s only half developed so he can only make out a red background, a blue shirt without any details yet, and a man’s face with slicked back dark hair and sideburns and a moustache. The other canvas is a landscape orientation and is referencing a photo pinned to the wall behind it. The painting is of one of the parks in Piltover with the changing leaves of autumn raining down around a fountain with faceless people silhouetted. It’s almost done, if Viktor had to guess, and in an impressionist style while the other is closer to realism.

“These are beautiful Jayce,” he says with a sense of awe, his eyes wandering to the walls and the dozens of completed pieces of art. If Viktor’s honest, he’s a little jealous. Having such talent is an incredible feat and he would love to be able to do something so organic and less technical. Even his photography feels more like math than art to him. He just never had the mindset or patience to learn. “How long have you been making art?”

“Since I can remember. My fixation on it goes in and out though. Sometimes, it, uh… helps with my depression, but other times I’m too depressed to do it and I don’t touch it for months.”

Depression? That’s… not surprising. ADHD plus trauma can do that. He doesn’t seem like it on the outside but it’s all a façade of charisma. Viktor’s eyes return to the portrait painting and the dots are beginning to connect. “Is this who I think it is?”

“My dad, yeah. I’m trying to finish it for my mom for Christmas.”

I shouldn’t ask. I shouldn’t ask. “How, um… how often do you experience depression?”

“It’s, uh… it’s seasonal. Usually by December I’m fully in it.”

“I see.” Knowing that Jayce struggles every winter makes him ache deep in his chest. Viktor avoids alcohol out of fear that he will relapse when March 1st rolls around, but it brings a dark period in his life every year. “I mean… You probably guessed by now that I get depressed around the anniversary of my mom’s death. For about a month.”

“Yeah, mine intensifies in early January. That’s when my dad passed.” 

“With my mom dying on March 1st, late February and early March are hard on me.”

“I’m still glad you called me that weekend.”

“Me too. I didn’t… I didn’t want to bother my friends who have been supporting me for all these years. You were just… the only person I thought of when I wanted someone to keep my feet on the ground.” 

“I’m happy I could be there for you, just… to ease the pain a little. My, um, my dad died January 6th,” Jayce says meekly with a sullen smile. “I, uh… I usually don’t like going out for New Year’s because it’s just so close that by then I’m doing pretty fuckin’ bad.” 

Viktor traces the details that have been added to the painting of Jayce’s dad and fixates on the same hazel eyes his son has. “You seemed so… normal on New Year’s. Other than…”

“Yeah. Masking. Plus, you were a very helpful distraction. I appreciated your company a lot that night.”

Viktor digests that information and looks back on New Year’s in a new light. Jayce was so charming, funny and affectionate that Viktor had the brief fantasy that it was, in fact, a date. The only inkling that something was off was the tears that made an appearance. Approaching Jayce, Viktor reaches up and cradles his jaw, brushing his thumb over his cheek. “You don’t… you don’t have to mask around me.”

“I know. And you know you don’t have to with me either.” Jayce’s eyes are soft when they meet Viktor’s, the hazel shining in dark greens and browns in the moonlight, and Viktor wants to kiss him. It’s not for sexual reasons, but he thinks it might be for the sake of connection. 

We were supposed to remain strangers. We haven’t been for a long time, though. He’s my ‘darling’ now…

Seemingly picking up on Viktor’s desire, Jayce leans in and kisses him tenderly with one hand on his waist and the other cupping his neck. Viktor sighs through his nose as he melts into it, leaning forward so they’re chest to chest. He drops his crutch and loops his arm around Jayce’s neck, returning the kiss with a passionate desire. 

I don’t know what we are anymore. It scares me but I can’t stop coming back. 

Breaking the kiss, Viktor says, “I want you to fuck me up against a wall.” 

Without a word, Jayce nods and dives back in for another kiss. Viktor fully wraps his arms around Jayce’s neck while the other man’s hands travel to his waistband. He pushes his sweats and underwear downward and Viktor shimmies the rest of the way out of them. 

Picking up Viktor by his thighs, he carries him to the nearest wall where a dozen sketches are sticky tacked to it. He presses Viktor flush to the wall, grinding against his naked pussy. The fabric of his pyjama pants isn’t the most pleasant against his sensitive nerves, so Viktor squeezes his hand between them and dips past Jayce’s waistband to free his cock. Jayce makes a guttural moan into Viktor’s mouth when his tongue pushes past his lips, all while Viktor strokes him steadily. 

When Jayce eventually pushes inside, Viktor relishes in the feeling of his skin against his insides, welcoming him home. Jayce devours him with his mouth while fucking him furiously against the wall. Viktor enjoys the slow and gentle sex sometimes, but Jayce knows he likes it rough too. Viktor wraps his good leg around Jayce’s hips and it’s enough to make him feel secure while Jayce plows into him, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling Jayce’s studio.

When Viktor gets close, he breaks the kiss to bury his face in Jayce’s neck, clinging to the other man like his life depends on it. Jayce murmurs things like ‘I got you, baby’ and ‘eres tan precioso para mi’. Viktor has no idea what it means but Jayce sounds so sexy when he speaks Spanish that it quickly puts him over the edge. His walls clench around Jayce’s cock when he comes, and Jayce continues to fuck him hard and rough, making him whine and whimper. Not a minute later, Jayce reaches his orgasm, spilling his hot seed inside him. In the haze, Viktor thinks, Bože, that feels so good…

Both of them are panting from exertion and, presumably not wanting to keep standing against the wall, Jayce carries Viktor over to the cozy chair in the corner to sit while they come down from the high. Viktor is still clinging to Jayce, nosing at his neck and placing kisses over his pulse. He thinks maybe it’s the orgasm and their conversation that’s making him overly affectionate, but he’s too far gone to analyze it. 

“No quiero dejarte ir,” Jayce says quietly, and Viktor really should have taken Spanish in high school so he’d have an inkling for the translation.

“What did you say?” Viktor asks against his neck, taking in the scent of Jayce’s woodsy cologne. He’s indulged in it so many times now that the smell is a comfort.

“Nothing, was talking to myself,” Jayce says, wrapping one arm around Viktor’s waist and rubbing his back with his free hand. “We still have cake to eat.”

Viktor lets out a sigh and says, “Chocolate cake after a good orgasm sounds really nice.” 

“Mm… I never said thank you, by the way.”

Pulling away finally, Viktor sits up to look Jayce in the eyes. “For what?”

“Trusting me like this. I know you’re a practical man and you wouldn’t have unprotected sex, or practice BDSM, with just anyone. I mean, I’m honoured to be your fir—”

“Oh my god, don’t make it such a huge deal. It’s not like you took my virginity or something.”

Jayce laughs, brushing a stray lock of hair out of Viktor’s face and tucking it behind his ear. “Okay, okay. I won’t make a big deal about it. I still appreciate you trusting me.”

“Well… I feel like I can trust you,” Viktor quietly admits. It’s true. There’s very few people Viktor trusts in this world and Jayce, inexplicably, has become one of them. Which is why he still needs to keep him at an arm’s length.

“I trust you too,” Jayce says before leaning in for another kiss. Viktor lets him because he can hardly deny Jayce anything, which is a red flag he’s been ignoring. His hands cradle Jayce’s face, petting his beard with his thumbs, while they tenderly make out. 

After a few minutes, Jayce starts to go soft inside him and he can feel the cum dripping from him and likely staining Jayce’s pyjamas. Halting the kiss, Viktor says, “I want to clean up and go finish that cake.”

“M’kay, want to watch something?” Despite ending the liplock, Jayce continues by placing kisses on Viktor’s jaw and neck.

“Mm, weren’t we on season four of Parks and Rec?” Viktor combs his fingers through Jayce’s hair, enjoying the feeling of his lips on him. 

“Yeah, pretty sure we were on… episode fourteen?” Jayce says as he finally pulls away. Standing, he picks Viktor up and starts carrying him out of the room, and Viktor loops his arms around Jayce’s neck tightly. “I’ll come get your crutch after.”

“Such a gentleman,” Viktor teases.

“I try.”

Jayce cleans him up with a warm cloth in the ensuite bathroom before bringing back his discarded clothes and crutch. When they finally return to the couch, Jayce puts on the episode of Parks and Rec they were on and they finish the cake. Before long, Viktor ends up curled into Jayce’s side, one arm wrapped around his middle, while Jayce has his wrapped around Viktor’s shoulder. 

He can feel each breath Jayce takes and it soothes him into a delusion he’s been indulging in for months now. This is an average Friday night. They have sex, eat dessert, and cuddle on the couch while watching old seasons of comfort shows. Jayce loves him and he loves Jayce. It’s a nice fantasy, one he dozes off too. 

Viktor doesn’t know how long it’s been when he awakes to Jayce saying, “Hey baby, it’s late. We should get ready for bed.”

“Ale jsi tak pohodlný,” Viktor murmurs, burying his face further in Jayce’s shirt.

“I’m going to assume that’s a protest but it’s almost four,” Jayce whispers with a chuckle.

Groaning, Viktor opens his eyes and sees that the TV is off and the only thing illuminating the living room is the moonlight pouring in from the wall of windows behind them. “How long…?”

“About an hour. I dozed a little too.”

“Ugh, I don’t want to walk all the way to your ugly bedroom.”

Laughing softly, Jayce says, “I can carry you.”

While Viktor likes to be independent and tries to act like he doesn’t need help from anybody, he’s half asleep and Jayce is offering. Plus, he knows if he protests it might turn into an argument based on evidence and facts, and Jayce would win anyway. It’s the only argument he has been able to win thus far. So, he says, “Okay.” 

Unlike earlier, Jayce picks him up bridal-style and Viktor frankly loves it. He rests his head against Jayce’s shoulder and holds onto his shirt with one hand. When they reach the bathroom, Jayce sets him down and Viktor just uses the vanity to support himself. Even though Viktor hasn’t been to Jayce’s place in a couple months, his toothbrush is still in the cup by the sink. A weird feeling starts to brew in Viktor’s chest, like Jayce not getting rid of it is something significant.

Never did I think I would have a toothbrush in someone else’s bathroom… this is a bad sign.

“You okay?” Jayce places a hand on his shoulder and Viktor snaps out of his daze.

“Uh, yeah… just tired,” Viktor dismisses, grabbing his toothbrush and brushing his teeth. He shoves the critical thoughts down into the deepest recesses of his mind and decides to continue indulging in this Jayce-based fantasy.

Maybe it’s not about Jayce, maybe it’s just that I haven't experienced domesticity before and I’m addicted to it, even if it’s conditional.

That’s probably not the truth because I already know I utterly adore him.

Viktor stays clothed when they get in bed, only because Jayce likes to keep the A/C on high, and lies in Jayce’s arms when he’s invited. Jayce is only in his boxer briefs, which Viktor appreciates so he can feel his warm skin under his palm as he holds onto Jayce. 

“Thanks for coming home with me tonight. It was a pretty good birthday,” Jayce says quietly as he rubs Viktor’s shoulder gently.

“Mm, I was just in it to get dicked down,” Viktor teases, earning an amused scoff in return. “I’m kidding. You’re welcome. If I knew it was your birthday I would have at least made Saturday work.” 

“Thought you didn’t want to know personal details?”

“Well… some are okay. We’ve shared, um… quite a bit.”

“That’s putting it lightly.”

“It’s fine as long as you don’t think I’m your boyfriend,” Viktor says and he’s trying to sound teasing but he knows there’s a hint of disappointment in his voice. I can’t entertain such an idea. I have my career, Rio and my friends to worry about. There’s no room in my life for a boyfriend, but… I can play pretend for a few hours here and there.

“Of course not. I know… what our arrangement is.”

Viktor wants to ask what, because even he doesn’t know what their arrangement is anymore. Instead, he avoids it and says, “Glad we’re on the same page. Goodnight, Jayce.”

“Night, Vik.”

Viktor falls asleep in Jayce’s arms, as he has so many times before, to the delusion of Jayce being his boyfriend despite his words.

Tuesday, July 14th, 2020

It’s after 7 pm on the Tuesday after Viktor last saw Jayce when his phone rings and he shows up on Viktor’s caller ID. Answering on speaker while he continues to do a few sudoku puzzles, Viktor says, “I assume you got my package.”

“Yeah, I was just calling to ask you about it,” Jayce says through the phone. “When I saw an Amazon package at my door with your name on it I was confused.”

“It’s a belated birthday gift,” Viktor replies. I never buy anyone birthday gifts. He doesn’t know how special he is. “Have you opened it yet?”

“Oh? No, I haven’t. Figured I’d do it now.”

“Go ahead.”

There’s some paper rustling, presumably from the envelope containing the gift, and after a few moments Jayce says, “Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall?”

“It was recommended to me on Amazon since I bought Red, White and Royal Blue from there. And, it came out on your birthday, so it felt serendipitous.” 

“Is this another book club opportunity?”

“Yep. My own copy was here when I got home from work.”

“Thank you, this is really thoughtful, Vik.”

Viktor shrugs, though he immediately feels silly because Jayce can’t see him. “It’s nothing. It’s just as much for you as it is for me.”

“You wanna start tonight?”

“I still need to have dinner, but yeah. I’m waiting for my Panera Bread order.”

“Jealous. Whatcha get?”

“French onion soup, mac and cheese, and a grilled cheese sandwich. So, basically, the most autistic food I could order from there—all brown and beige.” 

“Don’t forget your lactose pills, for your asshole’s sake.”

Snorting, Viktor shakes his head. “I absolutely won’t. Do you want to read over the phone or text?”

“Phone might be easier. Let me know when you’re done eating and I’ll call you back. I was just about to make myself one of those frozen skillet meals because I’m exhausted from work.”

“Still no luck with the hiring?” Viktor asks, finishing one of the puzzles and moving on to the next before chewing on his pen.

“Yeah, it’s fuckin’ abysmal. Let’s just say we require a lot of specific experience and credentials and nobody is matching up with our needs.”

“I’m sorry, baby, I hope you find someone soon,” Viktor says, not even registering the common pet name at this point. 

“It’s alright. I’m surviving for now,” Jayce sighs. “I miss you already, by the way.”

His face flushes from the admission, prompting him to chew on his lip nervously. I shouldn’t say it, I shouldn’t say it. I keep saying it but I shouldn’t. “I miss you too.” Fuck. 

“Can I come over on Friday?”

“Yeah, I was hoping you would.”

“I’m more than willing. Eager, in fact.”

Viktor’s phone pings, notifying him that his delivery is pulling up. “Okay, I have to go, my food’s here.”

“Alright. I’ll talk to you soon, mi cielo.” 

Butterflies beat against Viktor’s inner walls from the more recent term of endearment, one that is becoming more and more prevalent. I shouldn’t be reciprocating this but I can’t stop myself. “Yeah, talk to you soon, můj miláčku.”

After they hang up and Viktor gets his food from the door, he sighs heavily as he sits back down on his couch. “Kurva. I’m in so fucking deep,” he mutters, counting down the minutes before he can talk to Jayce again. 

It’s not until after 8 pm that Jayce calls him back. They read for hours. They get ready for bed on the phone. They continue to read in bed. And Viktor doesn’t remember what happened because he’s woken up by Jayce’s voice after falling asleep some odd hours later. 

“Hey, baby?” He hears Jayce from next to him. 

His eyes are still shut and he curls deeper into the blankets while reaching out for Jayce. But he’s met with an empty bed and an overheating phone. Cracking his eyes open, he registers that there’s a dim light coming from beneath his curtains. “Mm… Jayce? Did I fall ‘sleep?”

“Yeah, I did too. It’s a little after seven.”

“Ó můj bože,” Viktor mutters, rubbing a hand over his face and picking up his phone to look at the screen. His jaw drops. “We’ve been on the phone for eleven hours.”

Jayce chuckles through the speaker. “To be fair, we were asleep for… less than half of it, but still a good chunk.”

“Well… Good morning,” he replies, unable to resist the flush that reaches his cheeks. I like that he was the last person I spoke to before falling asleep and the first person when I woke up. 

“Good morning, mi cielo,” the other man coos. “How did you sleep?”

“Not enough… You?”

“Same. You have any dreams?”

“I think… You might’ve been in one of them? Yeah, wait, I think we were on a cruise and you saw Spongebob there and you really wanted to get your picture with him. Then he ate you.”

“... Spongebob ate me?”

“Yeah, he kinda got really big and swallowed you whole.”

“Pretty sure that’s called vore.”

“Oh. Well… I didn’t like it.” Jayce laughs and it’s the most beautiful sound to hear first thing in the morning, in Viktor’s opinion. I wish he was here. “I wish you were here.” Viktor doesn’t even realize he said it at first.

“I wish I was there too… I wish I lived closer, if I’m honest.”

“Move to Zaun then,” Viktor huffs out a laugh, partially joking. Partially.

“Nah, I’m gonna wait until we get our dream house,” Jayce teases.

“Oh, that reminds me, I would like to make an addendum to the dream house.”

“Alright, shoot.” 

“One of those window nooks with the cute cushions surrounded by books.”

“That could go in our office.”

“You know, I was considering that,” Viktor grins. Part of me really wants that house with him. 

Viktor should know by now that their situationship is becoming unmanageable, because he doesn’t hang up. Both of them stay on the phone while they brush their teeth, shower, dress, eat, even read the news together, and then drive to work. 

“Alright, I made it,” Viktor sighs, looking at his phone screen to see that they’ve now been on the phone for twelve hours and forty-two minutes. 

“I’m just pulling up now,” Jayce replies with his own sigh. “Guess this is it. Gotta go do our adult jobs rather than staying in bed to read gay romance books.”

“Is this a hate crime?”

“You know what, I think it is.” The grin in Jayce’s voice is evident. “We should sue capitalism itself.”

“Eh, I’m not winning that case because I evidently like working. I fear what I’ll do when I retire.”

“Probably pick up a million hobbies and books to kill time.”

“Honestly, that’s probably accurate… Okay, it’s five to, I actually have to go to the office now,” Viktor says reluctantly, biting back a smile. 

“Ugh, yeah… Alright, I’ll talk to you later, angel. I’ll miss you.”

“Yeah, talk to you later, baby. Miss you too.”

With that, they hang up and Viktor is left with a conflicting stir of emotions within him. I wish I could have him all the time. Fall asleep to him. Wake up to him. Go to work with him. 

It scares me how badly I want it.

Chapter Text

Monday, August 10th, 2020 - Tuesday, August 11th, 2020

It’s an average Monday in mid-August when something unexpected happens. Viktor is texting Jayce back and forth during his lunch break, eating a sandwich in his office. They had been talking about the new Glass Animals album that they had been listening to together since it launched on Friday, and they’re both hyperfixated.

J ❤️‍🔥
so after a dozen listens
i honestly think ur love might be my fave still

V 💕
That’s funny because I think it’s one of the weaker songs on the album. 
To me at least.
After Melon and the Coconut.

J ❤️‍🔥
what!!!!
how can u hate 🍈+ 🥥???
it’s so dave

V 💕
It reminds me of S2E3, which was probably my least favourite on HTBAHB.
Other than Cane Shuga.
My favourite is definitely Domestic Bliss.

J ❤️‍🔥
of course it is

V 💕
What is that supposed to mean? 😒

J ❤️‍🔥
u always like the sad shit 😔

V 💕
You want to talk sad? You introduced me to Sleep Token.
Plus most of the songs are kind of sad.

He puts his phone down to try to focus on eating his sandwich, however Jayce is his greatest weakness when it comes to distractions. When his phone buzzes again, he expects his next text to be from Jayce, but he’s caught off-guard because it’s from an unknown number. At first he thinks it must be spam, but then he reads.

Unknown
hey viktor! it’s ekko, pow’s boyfriend
she gave me your # because i know an opportunity that might interest you

Adding Ekko in his contacts, he replies right away because his curiosity is piqued.

Viktor
Hello, Ekko. I hope you are well. You mean a job opportunity?

Ekko
i’m good! and yeah
there’s an opening at my work and i thought of you

Pinching his brows together, Viktor stares at his phone in confusion. How did he know? Did Pow tell him? Ever since their project got scrapped in November, he’s been wanting a new job, but he struggles with change and job hunting is abysmal. He’s been, admittedly, procrastinating looking at all. He just has ‘open to opportunities’ on LinkedIn and even that he hasn’t checked in a couple weeks.

Viktor
Did Powder say something that made you think I was looking for a new job?

Ekko
uh, yeah, kinda
she said you hate the new dean and you’re not a fan of what your work is being used for

Viktor
I see. That’s putting it lightly. Could you tell me about the job?

Ekko
it’s a team lead position in the R&D department
the role has actually been open for a while, I only just thought of you yesterday
don’t know why but it was obvious 🤦🏿‍♂️
Hextech is still pretty lean, so the only person above you would be the CTO
we’re currently working on a microlaser that combines all three laser types that fight cancer
trying to make it smaller and more effective than existing ones too

As Viktor reads, he starts to feel a manic sense of… hope building in his gut. Working on medical equipment to fight cancer. That would honestly be a dream job.

Viktor
It seems too good to be true. What’s the catch?

Ekko
uh… it’s based in piltover 
i would say that’s the only downside

Ah, Viktor thinks to himself. So I would have to cross the bridge for an opportunity like this. That could be… not terrible. The commute would suck, but it could be worth it.

Viktor
Could I send you my resume? 
As much as I don’t love working in Piltover, I’m not fool enough to pass up an opportunity like this. 

Ekko
yeah, just send it to [email protected] 
i’ll pass it along asap

Viktor
Thank you for thinking of me, Ekko. I appreciate it. I will email you tonight. 

He does just that. As soon as he gets home, he opens his personal laptop, touches up his resume, and sends it to Ekko.

It’s not even 11 am the next day when his phone rings. Leaving the lab to step into his office, he answers the call just as he sits down. “Hello?”

“Yes, hello! Is this Viktor Cermak?”

“Yes, who is speaking?”

“My name is Cecil Heimerdinger—you can just call me Heimerdinger—and I’m the Chief Technology Officer at Hextech. Ekko Luciole sent me your resume this morning as part of a referral for a Team Lead position in our Research and Development department. I understand you’re interested in the position?”

“I am, but I don’t know much about it if I’m being honest. Ekko told me you’re working on medical equipment for treating cancer and that is what interests me.”

“Oh, may I ask why?”

Viktor hesitates but he swallows a lump in his throat. This Heimerdinger guy is a complete stranger but… well, using my dead mom might actually give me a leg up, as fucked up as that is. “My mother died of lung cancer. I would personally love to work on any projects related to treating it.”

“Ah, I’m sorry for your loss, Viktor. It is quite understandable why this opportunity interests you,” Heimerdinger says with a sullen tone before his voice returns to a more chipper pitch. “I am not a fan of formal interviews, especially not when a candidate is being referred, so I would like to meet you for coffee to discuss. How does that sound to you?”

“Thank you, Heimerdinger. Coffee sounds great,” Viktor says as he opens his day planner. When he lands on the week before, his eyes are drawn to Friday where he wrote ‘J’ with a little heart. A sudden sick feeling floods his stomach. He doesn’t even remember drawing the heart. 

Oh. Oh no. No no no. I can’t do this… I need to stop seeing him.

“Does that work for you?” Heimerdinger says, snapping Viktor out of his thoughts.

The sick feeling remains as he forces himself to focus on the man he’s speaking to. Clearing his throat, he replies, “Oh, sorry. Could you please repeat that?”

“Yes, I asked if you were free tomorrow at 8 am? I understand you work at Zaun U, so I could come meet you there.”

“Yes, I would appreciate that. I am available. There’s a coffee shop only a block away I quite like. Could you meet me at the front entrance of the sciences building?”

“Indubitably,” the man says jovially. He’s certainly not the typical c-suite stereotype. “I look forward to meeting you tomorrow, Viktor.”

“Yes, you too.”

When he hangs up, there are two feelings that are battling for dominance inside him. One, the rush of excitement for a new prospect. And two, the dread of the disaster that is his personal life. I might be falling in love with Jayce, is the catastrophic thought that shatters every corner of his psyche like a sledgehammer to a mirror. He sits and stares at the heart on the page for a moment before he flips back to their hookup before last in early August. There’s a heart on that one too. When did I start doing that?

It’s on the week before too. And the one before. And the week before that, he made the note ‘saw J’ on July 10th. There’s a heart next to that too. So does ‘J’s b-day’ on the Tuesday that he retroactively added.

The week before doesn’t. 

Fuck. I may have just fallen in love with Jayce Talis on July 10th, 2020 and it took me exactly thirty-one days to realize it.

That’s… no. That’s impossible. I can’t be in love with him. 

Right?

“I have to shut it down,” he says quietly as he stares at the exact date that his life became completely derailed. “That’s the only thing I can do…”

“Shut what down?” 

Viktor jumps, looking up at where Powder is standing in the doorway with her eyebrow arched in question. 

“N-Nothing,” Viktor stammers, flipping back to the current week and quickly writing ‘coffee with Heimerdinger @ 8 am’ before closing it.

“It’s not nothing, you’re being weird,” she says, looking at him suspiciously. “Were you talking about work?”

“No, just a… personal situation.” 

Powder frowns. “Why are you being mysterious?”

“Because it’s extremely personal, please just drop it, Pow,” Viktor sighs, putting his face in one hand. 

“Okay…” She’s clearly disappointed and even worried by her tone of voice, but she moves on. “Lil’ man said he passed your resume on to his CTO. Was that him?”

“Yes, I’m meeting him for coffee tomorrow,” Viktor says with a pause. He knows what this means. If I got the job, I wouldn’t be working with Pow anymore. “Listen, I… I don’t want to leave you—”

“Bro, I can handle myself. You don’t have to be my work babysitter anymore.” Powder crosses her arms and pinches her brows together. 

Viktor sighs, looking at her fondly. “Yeah. It’s hard to forget you’re not the snot-nosed twelve-year-old that follows me around anymore.” 

“Nope! Just the snot-nosed twenty-six-year-old gunning for your job when you leave,” she smirks.

“You’d want to be Team Lead if I left?”

“Uh, yeah? I know your job inside and out. I know the projects like the back of my hand. Plus, I’d finally get the privilege of making that Salo mother fucker squirm when you’re gone.” 

Not only does Viktor hate the dean, but a large appeal of getting the fuck out of Zaun U is the fact that he’d no longer have to tolerate sexual harassment from PA’s rep. “I would love to witness that but I’d rather not be here for it.”

“Understandable,” Powder nods, studying his face. “Do you want this job? Other than getting you out of here?”

“Yeah… they’re working on cancer treatment equipment.”

“I know. Ekko told me. I thought it would be a good fit for you.”

“I still have to get through an interview process, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“Nah. You’re gonna get it, I know it,” she smirks. “Anyway, we just got the materials for the first prototype. Time to get crackin’.” 

“Alright, I’ll be out in a minute.” Powder nods before leaving his office. 

Sitting back in his chair, nausea begins to stir in his stomach. I’m… I’m in love with him. Fuck. I thought I had more time before I had to end things with him.

Glancing at his phone, he tries to resist the temptation of texting Jayce. He’s pretty sure his phone vibrated while he was talking to Heimerdinger, and it was more than likely the man he’s in love with. I should just ignore him, is what Viktor thinks as he reaches for his phone.

J ❤️‍🔥
did another listen of dreamland omw to work
tangerine might be my new fave 🍊
i love this line
“tiny tangerine speckles painted in your eyes”
reminds me of ur eyes

Viktor lets out a shaky breath, sets his phone down, and leaves Jayce on read.

Wednesday, August 12th, 2020

The next morning, Viktor is waiting outside the sciences building, leaning against the concrete wall housing aesthetically neutral bushes that provide a minimal amount of greenery outside of Zaun U’s main quad. Something unusual catches his eye though: a yordle with strawberry blonde and white hair coating his face, styled like a large bushy moustache, dressed in a deep blue business suit. Yordles aren’t common these days, so Viktor has never seen one in person, only on TV.

He reminds himself that it’s rude to stare, so he looks ahead at the bustling street of downtown Zaun where dozens of strangers are making their way to work or getting their morning coffee. After a minute, a familiar chipper voice asks, “Might you be Viktor Cermak?”

Viktor turns to the source of the voice and realizes he has to gaze downward at the yordle he had seen moments before. “Oh, yes. Heimerdinger, is it?”

“Yes indeed, Mr. Cermak,” Heimerdinger holds out a hand, looking to shake Viktor’s. “Your hair was much shorter in your profile on LinkedIn.”

“Ah, yes. My headshot is a little out of date, I’m afraid. Please, call me Viktor,” he says, bending down as far as he comfortably can to shake the man’s hand. “Forgive me, I wasn’t expecting—”

“A yordle? No, of course not, we’re quite a rare breed in this day and age. I maybe should have told you over the phone yesterday so you knew who to look out for.” 

“What’s important is we found each other. The café is just this way,” Viktor nods to the left, turning to guide the man. “How has your morning been?”

“Quite lovely! I can already feel the impending autumn in the air, it’s invigorating. How about yours?”

Let’s see. I slept terribly, because I was anxious. I woke up in a tremendous amount of pain, more than usual. I haven’t even been able to eat with how nervous I am. I’m still coming to grips with the fact that I’m in love with my fuck buddy and I know I’m going to have to cut him off, which I’m dreading. Kinda shit, if I’m honest. “Oh, just fine. I agree, fall is my favourite season,” he says pleasantly, doing his best to mask his true feelings. 

A few minutes later, they’re sitting at a small table in the café with a cup of coffee for each of them. Heimerdinger’s tastes remind him of Jayce because the yordle ordered an oatmilk latte. “First, I’d like to know who Viktor is.”

“Well, I’m an ambitious person. I’m passionate about my work and exceptionally organized. When it comes to leadership, I enjoy teaching my direct reports so they might better themselves, and help them achieve things greater than their own expectations.”

“Those are all great qualities to have professionally, but I want to know who Viktor is, not what you can do in the workplace,” Heimerdinger replies with a cheeky demeanour. “I think a culture fit is very important because that can impact an employee’s, and the team's, happiness.”

Viktor pauses, trying to gather his thoughts. How do I voice this to be as appealing as possible while still being honest? I should be blunt because I wouldn’t want to work anywhere bigoted. 

“Well… I’m an immigrant from Czechia, I came to the United States with my mother when I was eight. I grew up in Zaun when it was less… developed, which taught me to be self-reliant and independent. I was born with femoral anteversion and my mother was an oncology nurse, which led me to work in bioengineering and wanting to help people to begin with. Because of this, I have also been aiming to specialize in medical equipment, which is why this position interests me so much. Other than that… I have a cat who is a spoiled princess. I like to read queer books and consume 90’s media. And I’m passionate about social issues like accessibility, police brutality and LGBTQ+ rights.” 

“Brilliant. I have a pet poro who is a spoiled little prince as well. His name is Porofessor because I used to be a professor at Piltover Academy,” Heimerdinger chuckles giddily. “I admire you being upfront about your passion for social issues. I believe that people who are proactive and caring about the society around them are exactly the type of people who should be working in STEM—people who want to make the world a better place and aren’t in it for the money. I think you would get along very well with our existing lead.”

“Existing lead?” Viktor tilts his head.

“Oh, yes!” Heimerdinger perks up, folding his hands in front of him. “This is a co-lead position. As our R&D department has grown, our current Team Lead has become overwhelmed. This would be a collaborative role. He specializes in medical equipment engineering and we founded the company together with our CEO. We went into business together after he designed a revolutionary biomed material and heart valve replacement when he was a student of mine.”

“Oh, he sounds… impressive,” Viktor says, uncertain what else to say about the matter. He’s intrigued by the man he would theoretically collaborate with. I just hope he isn’t an uptight asshole. I’m already enough of one, we don’t need two of us.

“I understand that you have a history of working on medical equipment. Could you please tell me a little bit about your experience?”

“Yes. My team and I are currently working on a nanomachine project intended to monitor vitals, but I believe our previous project is more relevant. I led a prosthesis project for two years where we were trying to develop a non-invasive solution for prosthetic control. Using electroencephalography, it would detect certain brain waves and the algorithm myself and my assistant developed would translate them into movement. The device would then transmit that movement to the prosthesis via Bluetooth for near instantaneous movement. We were working with a functioning prototype hand that we managed to get to hold a pencil and write in pre-clinical trials. It wasn’t perfect, but we were making strides in development before the project was shelved.”

“That is incredibly impressive,” Heimerdinger nods before furrowing his brows. “Why was such a revolutionary project shelved though?” 

“Off the record… The new dean decided that this nanomachine project the military is commissioning Zaun U to develop was more important than our prosthesis research. I fought tooth and nail to keep the project alive but I wasn’t successful,” Viktor says with a sigh. “Honestly, it’s part of the reason why I’m in search of new opportunities. I believe my skills can be used for more impactful projects that will help people with illnesses and disabilities, which is something I’m passionate about.”

“I agree that your previous project sounds much more impactful. Not to say the work you’re doing now is insignificant, I just believe you could provide great leadership elsewhere. Your talents would be an excellent fit for our team,” Heimerdinger says with a stroke of his moustache. “Would you like the job?”

Viktor is floored. He stares at the yordle with disbelief, blinking as though he just grew a second head. “I… just like that?”

“Yes, just like that,” Heimerdinger nods enthusiastically with a gentle smile. “I looked at your resume and LinkedIn profile, and I was impressed. I was also very interested in your PhD thesis about AI being used for live pressure and position adjustments in walking aids that you mentioned on your profile. I think you have incredible potential and I would like to foster that, if you wish.”

“I, um… I will be honest, I’m a little in shock right now. This is the easiest job interview I’ve ever had.”

Laughing, the other man says, “That’s what I like to hear! So, will you consider the offer?”

“I will definitely consider it. Could you send me a formal offer with all the details?”

“Absolutely. I will draft it as soon as I get to the office.”

“Thank you very much for this opportunity, Heimerdinger. I greatly appreciate it.”

They finish their coffee, chatting about the news and podcasts they’ve both listened to and Viktor says goodbye to Heimerdinger at ten to nine. When he enters the Engineering R&D lab and makes his way to his office, Powder perks up from her station and follows him inside.

“Sooooo, how’d it go?” She asks casually, rocking back on her heels.

“Can you close the door?” Viktor raises a brow, setting down his bag. 

Nodding, Powder follows his direction and looks at him expectantly. 

“He offered me the job,” Viktor drops the bomb without any hint of emotion.

“What? Holy shit, Vik! That’s amazing!”

“I didn’t take it right away.”

Powder knits her brows together. “Wait, why? Isn’t this like your dream job?” 

“Yes, and I’m being cautious because it feels too good to be true. I’m also cautious because it was a startup and we both know how toxic those can be. I don’t want to end up at a place that thinks free snacks and a pool table is great compensation for a lack of proper health benefits.”

“Alright, alright, I get your point. I will say, from what I know of Ekko’s benefits, Hextech seems like no bullshit. He’s got a full drug plan and a lot of shit is fully covered by his insurance. Plus, the pay is hella good. He makes fifteen more than I do.”

Viktor pauses, because he knows exactly how much Powder makes. “He makes eighty-five as an intermediate chemical engineer?”

“Yeah. His job pays well and he’s super happy there so we’re saving for a house.”

Viktor raises his brows comically high. “Wait, haven’t you only been dating him a year and a half?”

“Yeah, so what?” Powder shrugs. “I know he’s the one, what does it matter?”

“It’s just… kinda fast, isn’t it? You guys just moved in together six months ago,” Viktor frowns with concern.

“Yeah and we agreed that, give it a year or so, we can probably qualify for a mortgage. That’s not what’s important right now. This place seems legit. I think you should take it.”

With a sigh, Viktor puts his crutch against his desk and shakily walks over to Powder despite the pain flaring in his hip. “If I take this job… I’m going to really miss working with you.” 

“I know, bro,” she says and the smile she gives him is laced with mourning. “We’ll have to get drinks to celebrate.”

Wrapping his arms around her shoulders, he pulls her in for a tight embrace. “I love you and the last few years we’ve gotten to work together have been some of the best.”

“Yeah, until that shit stain showed up,” Powder huffs out a laugh as she loops her arms around his waist. “I love you too. I’m really happy for you, I know work has been miserable for you.”

“Thanks, Pow,” he says, squeezing her tightly before pulling away. “Alright, enough sappy shit, we’ve got work to do.”

The entire day he’s on edge, like he’s walking on a tightrope and one wrong movement will send him spiralling. He’s having a difficult time believing this is real, and the idea of change makes him nauseous, but he tries to remind himself that it’s a good change. Just after 3 pm he receives an email from Heimerdinger, but he decides to save it for when he’s at home and he can be anxious in peace.

As soon as he gets home, he feeds Rio then sits on his couch to crack open his laptop. He takes a deep breath and reads the email.

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Formal Offer for Team Lead

Good afternoon, Viktor!

As promised, attached is a formal offer for the Team Lead position, as well as details about company benefits. Please let me know if you have any questions! If you choose to accept, let me know when you can start. We prefer sooner rather than later, but I also understand that you have obligations to your current employer.

Best,

Heimerdinger

Opening the attached PDF, Viktor mentally prepares himself.

He didn’t prepare himself enough because the six digit number staring back at him leaves him gobsmacked. “One-twenty? Are you fucking serious?” Looking over at Rio now lying next to him, he says in disbelief, “A hundred and twenty thousand. Can you fucking believe that, Ri?” As if she understands, she happily chirps, which he pets her head in response. 

It doesn’t look like there’s a catch. It’s full-time and salary, not a contract. And when he moves onto the benefits, while there are things like office snacks and team lunches, there’s no bullshit. 401K, full drug plan, dental, vision, health and even life insurance. His physio would be fully covered, which he only has partial coverage for at the moment. Not to mention, he doesn’t have life insurance with the University. And as a bonus, there’s a commute allowance.

He doesn’t need to consider it any further. Digitally signing the offer, Viktor attaches it to his reply.

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: Formal Offer for Team Lead

Hello Heimerdinger,

Attached is the signed offer. I will put in my notice tomorrow and I will try to start as soon as possible. I have a feeling, given my position and the need to train my replacement, I may need three weeks. So, tentatively, I can start Monday, September 7th. Let me know if that works for you. 

Best,

Viktor

While he’s at it, he logs into Slack and shoots his director a message asking for a meeting tomorrow. The next thing he does is open his text messages to share the good news.

Wednesday 6:02 PM

Vik 🐐
I took the job.

Pow 🦋
OMG
YAY!!!!

Sky 💫 
That’s amazing Vik!!!!
I assume it was a good offer?

Vik 🐐
Better than good.
Six digits good, and full benefits.

Pow 🦋
HELL YEAH
GET THAT 💰💰💰🤑

Sky 💫 
When do you start!?

Vik 🐐
Tentatively, September 7th.
Oh god, I can’t believe I’m doing this.
Is this the right decision?
I would be crazy not to take it, right?

Sky 💫 
Yes!!!!! You would be crazy!!!
Try not to psych yourself out.

Pow 🦋
DONT LET UR TAURUS MOON TALK U OUT OF THIS!!!!
OR I S2G I… 
I DONT KNOW WHAT ID DO
BUT U BETTER NOT OR ELSE!!!!

Vik 🐐
Astrology isn’t real, Powder.

Pow 🦋
yes it is
ur taurus moon HATES change
thats y it took u almost a fuckin year to move on

Vik 🐐
I’m not having this argument again.
It’s nonsense. 
I regret telling you my birth time every time you bring this up.

Sky 💫 
Yes, no fighting. It’s time for celebrating!!!
Drinks Friday?
Or do you have a date, V? 👀

Viktor pauses the conversation to think about Jayce. They had no plans to meet up yet, but… he needs to cut things off anyway. Maybe he should ghost him. But Jayce knows where he lives and is bound to show up at his door. It might be best to pretend to be busy and make excuses until I get the guts to cut him off entirely.

Vik 🐐
I’m not planning to see him.
In the near or far future.

Sky 💫 
Wait, what?
Why?

Vik 🐐
I realized that it was becoming… unmanageable. 

Pow 🦋
bullshiiiiiit
u caught feelings n now ur freakin out
aqua venus ass

“Fuck, how does she know me so well?” Viktor grumbles to himself. He doesn’t want to admit it, but if he denies it Powder will call him on his bullshit. So, avoidance it is.

Vik 🐐
It doesn’t matter. 
It’s over.

Sky 💫 
Vik…

Pow 🦋
bro…

Vik 🐐
Please, don’t.
I thought we were celebrating?

As if on cue, Viktor gets a new text… from Jayce. With a sigh, he opens it and braces himself to turn him down.

6:17 PM

J ❤️‍🔥
hey baby
how’s it goin?

Chewing on his lip, he contemplates how to respond. Do I pretend everything is fine? I don’t want him to figure out I’m cutting things off so… act natural.

V 💕
Hey.
Really good, actually.
I got a job offer today.

J ❤️‍🔥
whaaaat!!!
that’s amazing!!!!
wait, is it? was it a good offer?

V 💕
It was extremely generous.
I’m actually… really nervous and excited about it. 
Mostly nervous. I’ve been nauseous all day.

J ❤️‍🔥
i’m so glad ur finally gettin the hell out of there
u deserve this

V 💕
Thank you.

J ❤️‍🔥
r u free this wknd?
i’m workin late fri but i’m free sat n sun

I want to say yes, Viktor thinks as his thumbs hover over the keyboard. Fuck. This is going to be hard. Maybe if I detox by avoiding him entirely, the feelings will go away.

V 💕
I’m actually busy all weekend.

J ❤️‍🔥
aw that sucks
can u do any night next wk?

V 💕
Sorry, work is going to be really busy with me leaving.
I don’t know when I’ll be able to hook up again.

J ❤️‍🔥
alright
i’ll check with u next wk
congrats on the job again ❤️

V 💕
Thanks. ❤️

J ❤️‍🔥
hope to see u soon angel 😘

Friday, August 14th, 2020

“You sure you just wanna go to Dad and Pops’ place? You really don’t wanna go somewhere new for your big celebration?” Powder asks from the passenger seat of Viktor’s used Prius as they drive down Janna Lane, the main strip of the Lanes. 

“I’m sure. I’m a creature of habit, remember? I like familiar comforts,” Viktor replies as he drives.

“Taurus moon,” Powder scoffs under her breath, leading Viktor to roll his eyes.

They pull into The Last Drop’s parking lot a few minutes later, conveniently just as Sky is getting out of her Nissan. She waves enthusiastically when she sees them, waiting at the trunk of her car as Viktor pulls into the spot next to her. Grabbing his crutch from the back seat, he gets out of his car and waves in return. “Hey, Sky.”

Sky practically squeals, jogging over to throw her arms around Viktor’s shoulders. “I’m so happy for your Vik! And I’m happy to see you.” She kisses his cheek several times before she realizes she left lipstick stains and she tries to rub it off with her thumb. “Oops. I just reapplied, my bad.”

Viktor huffs out a laugh. “It’s fine. It’s nice to see you too.”

“Bitch, where’s my hug?” Powder asks with false offense, opening her arms expectantly.

“Girl, you know I was about to get you. We’re celebrating Viktor, so he got first dibs,” she chastises with amusement before hugging Powder. “You’re poaching his job, right?”

“She’s not poaching my job, I endorsed her as my replacement,” Viktor corrects.

“Nah, I’m eating him to absorb his manager powers to become the new Team Lead. You know the younger siblings have to eat the older ones to gain their powers, right? Vi’s next.” All three of them crack out into laughter, Viktor’s more sardonic than Sky or Powder’s.

“Yeah, yeah, let’s cannibalize the cripple,” he says dramatically with a smirk.

“Oh please, if I actually tried to eat you, you’d beat my ass with your crutch and run me over with your car.”

“Both might be overkill. I’m sure I can make do with one or the other.” Locking his car and pocketing his keys, he nods his head towards the entrance. “Are we drinking or what?”

The three of them get their usual booth. It’s a Friday night so there’s a new folk band playing and the kitchen is open. They order the staples—wings, fries, and The Last Drop’s famous spinach and artichoke dip—plus round after round. Sky and Powder have diverted the conversation to the newest episode of Lucifer which Viktor hasn’t watched, so he checks his phone in the meantime.

There’s a text from Jayce waiting for him.

9:08 PM

J ❤️‍🔥
missing u ❤️
i didnt have a ref so its a lil rough
[image attached]

Viktor’s heart stops. Looking back at him is his own face in Jayce’s hand, several of him. They’re different sketches of Viktor—laughing, sleeping on the couch, smiling—and they’re all focused on his face. Jayce is supposed to be his fuck buddy, and yet, not a single depiction of him is sexual. They’re all perfectly innocuous, and they make him look more beautiful than Viktor has ever perceived himself as. Through Jayce’s art, Viktor wonders if he is that beautiful, or if this is just Jayce’s perception of him. Either way, it has the same outcome: it breaks his heart.

He’s already five drinks in, which means he’s not completely gone due to his high tolerance but his walls are crumbling faster than a burning building. The fires of his heartache are eating away at his insides and he knows the flames are going to spill out of him at any moment.

“Guys, can you take me upstairs?” Viktor asks suddenly with as little emotion as possible, putting his phone back in his pocket.

“Uh, yeah, Vik,” Sky responds, picking up on the absence of feeling from his tone. “Are you okay…?”

“Not here.” Without another word, Viktor stands and grabs his crutch. Heading toward the back room that leads to the apartment entrance, Viktor doesn’t wait for Sky or Powder to follow, assuming they’re right behind. Vander gives him an odd look when he passes the bar but Viktor doesn’t look back.

Powder is mere steps behind, and she cuts in front of him to unlock Vander and Silco’s apartment. The stairs give him a bit of a challenge between chronic pain and alcohol, but when he makes it to the top, he beelines for the couch and collapses onto it. Hunching forward, he lets out a choked sob, trembling from the emotional turmoil.

“Bro, what’s wrong?” Powder asks gently, kneeling in front of him and placing her hand on his knee. Viktor can only cry in response, the words trapped behind his agony like a caged bird.

Silently, Sky sits next to him and wraps her arm around his shoulders, the other hand gently rubbing his arm. “It’s okay, we’re here,” she soothes. “Take your time.”

“I—I’m in love with him,” Viktor weeps after a minute of hyperventilating and sobbing. “And I-I… I think he loves me back.”

There’s silence, other than his heartwrenching cries for a few moments before Sky says, “I don’t get it, Vik… isn’t this a good thing?”

“I’m not—I can’t—I shouldn’t be in love! I don’t do love!” Viktor exclaims, lifting his head and trying to wipe away the tears. “I’m not ready, no, no, no. I can’t do this. I need to just block his number and—god fucking damn it, he knows where I live. He knows where I currently work. He knows about my mom. He calls me his darling! What the fuck have I been doing!? I let this happen!”

“Okay, let’s do some deep breaths,” Sky guides, inhaling deeply and then exhaling slowly. Powder does the same but it doesn’t help, he’s too keyed up.

“I don’t want to fucking breathe! I want to go back to before I was stupidly in love with this random guy I decided to hook up with! I should have said no to him the second time, but nooo, I was fucking curious. That’s what made me sleep with him again—curiosity! And look where it got me! I’m the fucking cat!”

“Yo, Vik, get a hold of yourself!” Powder yells above his voice, shaking his shoulders. “So you finally admit you’re in love with him! Go fucking get him! What are you waiting for!?”

“You’re not listening to me! I can’t!” He yells back. “I’m not made to love, I’m just going to fucking hurt him or lose him. Why should I put him or me through that?”

“You don’t know that!” Powder snaps back. “You’re not your fuckin’ dad! You have to stop assuming you’re bad just because he was!”

There’s silence between the three of them as Viktor processes what Powder said, who looks like she regrets it now. It’s a low blow, only because she’s absolutely right. However, Viktor doesn’t want to look at the facts or admit that he avoids emotional attachments because he’s worried anger and bitterness would pollute his heart, only to be fuelled by an alcohol addiction. 

I’m scared of repeating history. The only person I ever deserved the love of is gone from this earth. 

That’s definitely an unhealthy outlook. 

Great. I’m a stereotypical white man in his thirties who claims he can only ever love his mother. 

“I think I’m going to go home,” Viktor finally breaks the silence, reaching for his crutch. “Thanks for the drinks.”

“Wait, Vik, I shouldn’t have said—” Powder tries to say before he cuts her off.

“You said what you said. It’s fine, Powder,” Viktor replies, devoid of emotion. Without another word, he turns away and slowly climbs down the stairs. When he gets to the ground floor, Vander is standing there with an expression of concern.

“Vik, is everything okay?” He asks gently, reaching out to touch his shoulder. 

“I’m fine. I don’t want to talk about it,” Viktor snips, shrugging off his large hand before turning and leaving the back room of the bar. Vander doesn’t say a word or come after him.

Five minutes later, he’s climbing into an Uber, his leg trembling from the exertion. Now that he’s finally alone, he can’t resist but indulge in his guilty pleasure: Jayce. He opens his texts and replies.

9:32 PM

V 💕
theyre beautiful muj milacku
I miss you too

J ❤️‍🔥
is everything ok?
u usually use proper grammar

V 💕
fine
drunk and tired
and I sort of had a fight with my sister
in an uber home now

J ❤️‍🔥
do u wanna talk abt it when u get home?

V 💕
no
what would make me feel better is if you came over and fucked me until I’m numb

J ❤️‍🔥
vik… i don’t want to fuck u when ur drunk
i would come over to keep u company and take care of u

A flare of anger roars in Viktor’s chest, and all the feelings of love and the residual devastation of his revelation twist into something ugly and unrecognizable: resentment. His thumbs practically punch his phone screen as he types the next two words.

V 💕
fuck you

J ❤️‍🔥
…what?

V 💕
I dont think I need to repeat myself
you were fine fucking me while I was knee deep in grief
what the fuck is different about this

J ❤️‍🔥
you were sober then
i’m not going to fuck u when ur drunk only to find out the next day that u regret it

V 💕
we drink and fuck all the time
what the fuck is the difference

J ❤️‍🔥
the difference is we both made that choice while under the influence and we were never DRUNK drunk
ur not urself rn
pls just let me come over and i’ll take care of u

Jayce being sweet and offering to come over to care for him, even though he just lashed out at him, makes the anger more intense. He loves me and he’s an idiot for it. I don’t want to be taken care of. I want to go back to my life before I met Jayce fucking Talis. He continues to lash out, responding bitterly.

V 💕
fuck off
youre always trying to take care of me like Im a fucking baby
Im tired of being infantilized by you

J ❤️‍🔥
vik
u know that’s not true
i take care of u bc i care about u
i said i knew u were entirely capable on ur own and told u if u want me to back off i’ll back off
why are u lashing out at me actually?

Viktor doesn’t get the chance to reply. The Uber has already arrived and he needs to get his ass inside. Shoving his phone in his pocket, he climbs out of the car and enters his home. Rio is crying at the door like a starving kitten immediately, even though Viktor left her some extra kibble that morning. “Yes, baby, I’m getting you dinner.”

He knows his phone has buzzed a couple times in the minutes it takes him to get his shoes off, feed Rio, and grab the bottle of whiskey sitting in his kitchen cabinet. He pours himself a shot in a tumbler with ice before knocking it back, then pours himself another.

His phone starts to ring. “Oh, for fuck sake, Jayce,” he growls under his breath, grabbing his glass and heading to his couch. Pulling out his phone from his pocket, it of course reads ‘J ❤️‍🔥’ because he couldn’t resist adding an emoji to his name. “What?” He answers unkindly, a bite in the single word.

“What is going on, Vik? Why are you angry with me?” Jayce sounds uncertain and anxious on the phone, which almost makes Viktor feel guilty. Almost.

“Because you—” you’ve completely flipped my life upside down and I don’t know what to do about this web of feelings inside of me that’s eating me alive. Viktor struggles to find the words, and suddenly… honesty is pouring out through his teeth. “I’m trying to push you away.”

“Why, mi cielo?”

“Don’t call me that right now.”

“Okay, I won’t. Why?”

“Because I’m not… I’m not good for you,” Viktor says with a shaky breath before taking a sip of his drink, ice clinking against the glass.

“Vik… are you still drinking?”

“What does it matter?”

“I think you’ve had enough. Please, put it down.” 

“I’m thirty-fucking-two and you are not my keeper, I will drink as much as I want to,” Viktor replies stubbornly, taking another sip in rebellion.

“I’m coming over,” Jayce says firmly.

“Why the fuck would you do that!? Haven’t you been listening to me!? I. Am. Not. Good. For. You. Or for anybody.”

“That’s what you think. The way I see it, you’ve been nothing but good to me.” 

“Oh, yeah, making you take care of me at my lowest, making you take me out and act like my boyfriend for almost a fucking year, and now—now yelling at you because you’re being too fucking nice to me!” Viktor exclaims, choking on a sob half way through his statement.

Jayce is silent for a long moment while Viktor tries to swallow down his cries, feeling embarrassed that he’s breaking down like this for the second time tonight. “I haven’t been acting.”

It’s like Jayce just gutted Viktor like a fish and is splaying him open to expose the meat inside. Jayce knew what he was doing, slowly enticing Viktor into being his companion—more than a companion—and Viktor fell for it. Fell hard. “I’m not—I can’t—Jayce I can’t do this.” 

“I can be patient, Viktor. It’s okay if you’re not ready for that.”

“I’ll never be ready,” Viktor starts to sob unrelentingly, not recognizing his own voice as he stutters into the phone between his cries. “I’m n-not good for you, Jay...”

“I think I should be the one to decide that,” Jayce says empathetically, and Viktor can hear some rustling on the other side. “I’m coming over. I’ll try to be there by 10:30 but I don’t know what the traffic’s going to be like.”

“Don’t—I’m not worth it,” Viktor continues to cry, barely breathing in between, as he hugs his legs to his chest. 

“You are. You’re worth it to me. Try to take some deep breaths, baby.” A door closes in the background and there’s a rattle of keys. “Do you want me to stay on the phone while I drive over?” 

“No… please don’t come. You should just… stay home, enjoy your night. I’ll be fine,” Viktor whimpers, rocking himself back and forth. He still tries to do what Jayce instructed, shakily inhaling deeply and exhaling slowly.

“I’m not buying that, Vik. I know you’re not yourself and I know you probably won’t call anyone else for support.”

“What the fuck do you know?” Viktor snaps despite the tears.

“I know you. I know you’re going to insist on suffering alone. You only called me when you were grieving your mother because I didn’t know why you were so upset.” There’s a ding of the elevator that Viktor is familiar with by now while he sits in utter silence. 

Fuck. Since when does he know me so well? Fuck. “I… I… Please, just don’t come over,” he whimpers again.

“I’m coming over, Vik. I’m not letting you sit at home and drink away your feelings. I’m just glad you picked up.”

“Yeah, to chew your head off.”

“My neck’s a little thicker than that. Still intact, I’m afraid.” 

Viktor sniffs and is unable to deny himself the laugh that bubbles out of him. “Fuck you for making me laugh.”

“Is it not better than crying?” There’s the sound of Jayce’s car door opening and closing. 

Viktor entertains staying on the phone with Jayce, and he knows he only does it because he’s hopelessly in love with this man. Jayce distracts him by talking about his week and asking Viktor about his. By the time Jayce arrives, the alcohol Viktor did drink before Jayce stopped him has settled in his bones, weighing his limbs down and making his brain feel like led. He forces himself to hang up and stand, shakily walking to the door to unlock it. He’s leaning on his crutch heavily when he lets Jayce in. 

Immediately, the compassion and empathy in Jayce’s hazel eyes make him want to crumple and fold. What if I told you I loved you right now? What would you do? Would you accept me or say I’m too broken to love, despite how you feel? 

“Hey baby,” Jayce greets him gently, stepping inside. He brought a backpack based on an assumption, but it’s understandable because it’s already late. I’d be an asshole if I told him to go home. I am an asshole though. Jayce drops the bag in favour of wrapping his thick arms around Viktor, tucking his head into Jayce’s chest. “I’ve got you, I’m here.”

Viktor melts into his arms, dissolving into sobs. Kisses are peppered on the crown of his head while he cries, dropping his crutch to cling onto Jayce’s hoodie. “Y-You shouldn’t have come,” he chokes, shaking in Jayce’s arms. 

“There’s no should or shouldn’t. I want to be here,” Jayce whispers against his temple before placing another kiss there. He lets Viktor cry for a couple minutes but when it dies down, Jayce says, “Why don’t we go sit?”

Viktor nods against Jayce’s chest before pulling away. He starts limping toward the couch without his crutch and Jayce calls after him, “Baby, shouldn’t you—?”

“Fuck my crutch,” Viktor replies stubbornly, his voice and leg trembling at the same time. He collapses on his couch with exhaustion and Jayce sits down next to him a moment later, opening his arms. 

“C’mere,” Jayce murmurs and Viktor doesn’t even bother to fight it. He’s too drunk to resist the comfort and companionship Jayce is offering. Settling in Jayce’s arms and holding him in return, tears begin to roll down Viktor’s cheeks again. “Tell me, what’s going on?” 

Viktor is silent other than the occasional sniff or hiccup. “I tried to kill myself, you know?” He eventually says.

Jayce stiffens underneath Viktor before tightening his hold on him. “Just now?”

“No… fourteen years ago. After I lost my mom… I only had two friends left in the world. My mom was my whole life, though. It was unhealthy and we were codependent but she was my everything,” Viktor whispers before tilting his head up to look at Jayce. He feels hollow inside talking about it, but Jayce is giving him an expression that’s so warm, caring and open that it makes the hollowness feel a little less painful. “I think, after enduring my dad’s alcoholism and abuse, we just became each other’s whole world when it was just the two of us. Without her, I felt empty. So, I tried to drink myself to death… then I tried to OD on shimmer.” 

“Holy shit, Vik…”

“There is only one other person in the world that knows that, and it’s the man that saved my life. I’ve never told my sisters or my best friend. Well, I suspect one of my sisters might know because… she told her dad about the shimmer, I’m pretty sure. So, congratulations—you’ve somehow managed to break down my walls. I confessed something I’m ashamed of that I wanted to take to the grave.”

Jayce is silent for a long moment, running a hand over Viktor’s hair as if it will make the conversation even marginally better. Viktor’s heart plummets when Jayce says, “I tried to take my own life too.”

“… What? You?”

“Yeah. You’re… You’re the only person who knows this.”

“What happened?” Viktor reaches up and strokes Jayce’s cheek, gazing at him with teary eyes. He’s drunk and desperate right now, begging for connection despite his protests.

“It’s a long story, mi cielo,” Jayce replies quietly, taking Viktor’s hand and kissing his palm. “I’m here to take care of you, remember?”

“Please tell me, I want to understand… It might help.”

“I… don’t really want to get into it. To summarize, I was seventeen, graduating high school, and I was torn on what I was going to do with my life. I was also having a sexuality crisis and my dog died, then I had a breakdown about my dad not seeing me graduate. Oh, and that’s when I got arrested for underage drinking,” Jayce explains, laughing uncomfortably. “It… it fucking sucked. Cait stopped me when she called me before I was going to jump from the bridge. She doesn’t know that to this day.”

“Oh… I’m… I’m sorry. That sounds like… a lot.”

“Yeah, it was pretty bad,” Jayce sighs with a frown. “Why were you bringing up your attempt?”

“I… I was trying to get you to see that I’m not good for you. I’m a broken person, Jayce. My mind is more crooked than my leg or my spine.”

“You’re not broken, and you’re not the only person with issues. I’ve got dad issues, you’ve got mom—well, and dad—issues. I think we make a pretty good pair.”

“Jayce… I’m an asshole, let’s be honest,” Viktor slurs, his head swimming in his drunkenness. “You deserve someone who is nice and is going to take care of you as much as you take care of them. I’m… I’m a fucking leech. I will bleed you dry.”