Chapter Text
Sophie collapsed onto the blue beanbag chair, visibly trembling. She’d just come back from her secret mission with Calla and Biana, and it clearly hadn’t gone well.
Keefe looked up from one of the many books he was being forced to read, concerned with the wave of guilt and panic flooding from Sophie’s direction. Fitz too looked up from where he was projected memories, making eye contact with Keefe and giving him a worried frown. Dex however, ignored this and continued fiddling with one of his many gadgets, though his hands shook slightly.
They all knew something was up, though none of them knew what to actually do.
“Hey, it’s Fitz. Sorry I didn’t ask permission to enter your mind, I just didn’t know how else to talk to you without Sophie hearing.”
“Don’t worry I’m as worried as you are.” Keefe thought, allowing Fitz to hear his reply.
“So, what do you think’s going on?” he continued
“I honestly don’t know, I mean I’ve see her upset before but it’s never been like this.” Fitz replied.
Dex crossed the room, and passed a note over the table where the two boys were sitting.
She’s having a panic attack. She used to have them all the time after we got kidnapped, but I thought they’d stopped. I guess she’s just been hiding them though. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her this bad.
Both boys read the note, concern only growing on their faces. Fitz looked up, opening his mouth to speak, when, out of nowhere, Sophie stood and ran from the room, shaking and breathing heavily.
“I’ll go.” Keefe said, already standing.
“No, I should. I’ve dealt with this before, I can again.” Dex protested.
“Which is exactly why you shouldn’t have to, Dexy. And I know you’ve had panic attacks before too, don’t try to lie, I’m an empath. I’ll deal with it so please trust me. Sit down Fitzster, I said I’m going. You two go get Della and tell her what’s happened, and maybe Calla too. We might need some of her calming flowers, sleeping ones too as a last resort.”
“Ok.” both boys grumbled, leaving to take care of their respective tasks.
Keefe took a deep, slightly shuddering breath before travelling across the wooden bridge towards Sophie’s room.
When he got there, he was surprised the door opened with ease. He would have expected Sophie to lock or barricade it. More proof of how much she was suffering.
He stepped into the room, his boots crunching on the leafy floor, finding Sophie curled into an impossibly small ball on the floor, shaking and sobbing uncontrollably.
“Oh Foster, I wish you’d actually tell us what’s going on for once.” he murmured, gently placing his hands onto her shoulders and manoeuvring her into a more comfortable position against his chest.
He uncurled her as much as he could, carefully pinning her legs and wrists, as he knew she would try to run the second she became aware of him.
A wave of guilt and self hatred washed over him as he felt Sophie’s thoughts spiral further.
“Stop.”
He felt her shoulders tense, but it was a reaction. She knew he was there. That was good. Now he could calm her more.
“That’s it Foster, focus on my voice. I’m here.”
She began to move more, looking around wildly as if she didn’t know where she was. He had to get her to start breathing properly.
“Breathe with me Foster. 5 in, 8 out. That’s it. Like that. Well done.”
It actually seemed to be working. Her eyes looked a little less sane, and he felt her begin to calm.
“Keefe?” she asked, making no attempt to hide her sobs.
“Yeah, it’s me. You’re ok. Don’t worry, i’m the only one here.”
She wasn’t trying to hide anymore, and that really worried him. Did that mean she’d given up masking? But how bad exactly was that?
Without warning, he felt another, overwhelming wave of anxiety course through him, and Sophie began to desperately attempt to pull away from his embrace.
He’d predicted this, and tightened his grip more. Now she seemed more coherent, he began speaking to her more, “Hey, no. None of that. Guilt’s bad, remember? Trust me, I know.”
He was worried. Seriously worried. Guilt could break an elf’s mind, and he was really worried that would happen to Sophie if he didn’t pull her out of this now.
“No, no, no. I have to go. Please let me go. You can’t see this. Please.” she tried again to run, flailing in his grip.
He knew he couldn’t let her go in this state, she could hurt herself, and from the emotions radiating off her, that was highly likely.
“Easy Foster. You’re not leaving, not until
you talk to me. What’s going on?” he tried again to reason with her.
And something in Sophie seemed to snap. All her resolve crumbled, and for the first time in well, ever, she actually seemed like she wanted to talk to him about what was plaguing her.
“It’s too much. It’s all too much. I can’t do this. It’s too dangerous for you all. You’re all getting hurt because of me, and I can’t stop it.” she whispered though sobs.
Keefe wanted to burst into tears right there. How could none of them have noticed how much she was hurting? They had to fix this, before it was too late.
“You’ve been hurt wayyyyy more than any of us, and we all knew it was dangerous when we signed up. And besides, you’d never be able to keep the amazing Keefe away for long.” he grinned, trying to somehow make light of the situation.
And for once, Sophie seemed to believe him. She let it all go. She sobbed into his chest, whispering apologies and worries, until she passed out, completely exhausted.
Keefe sighed, glad Sophie was actually sleeping. None of them had seen her do that in days. Anxiously, he lifted her into bed and tucked her in. Then, he removed the bejewelled dagger sticking out from underneath her pillow. She could have it back when they were sure she wouldn’t hurt herself. He closed the curtains and crept out, passing Calla on her way to put some calming flowers in the room.
As soon as he reached the clubhouse, he was ambushed by a cacophony of worried voices and questions from every direction.
“She’s not ok.” he said slowly, “And none of us really noticed. I’ll explain everything, just sit down.”
“And we,” he said, making eye contact with Dex “need to have a chat about exactly what happened after the kidnapping. You’re not ok either, you’ve been distant too and we all ignored it.”
Dex swallowed and nodded, not reacting when Fitz put an arm around his shoulders, and avoiding eye contact with them all.
“She feels alone. And we need to fix it.” Keefe began.