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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Hermione reluctantly runs a bar. When Draco comes in for a drink one night, he makes his interest immediately and insistently known. But the absolute last thing Hermione needs right now is to shag someone ten years younger than her with biceps bigger than his brain.

    …Probably.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,360
    Chapters:
    6/9
    Comments:
    489
    Kudos:
    869
    Bookmarks:
    225
    Hits:
    14,834

    08 Jul 2025

  2. Public Bookmark 25

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    or, A Fraught Correspondence Between Two Young People (& Its Fortunate Conclusion)

    I have no desire to marry, let alone propose by letter to a young miss I have never met. I vastly prefer the company of horses and hounds to the unenviable fate of being saddled with a wife and hounded by the very same.

    The Duchess of Alderaan and the Earl of Stewjon hope to encourage a match between their only children. Though Mr. Benjamin Solo and Miss Rey Kenobi have no interest in the martial schemes of their beloved relatives, they do have a pressing need to correct one another—at great length.

    But as prideful scorn shifts into unexpected friendship, are Rey’s witty insults becoming less acerbic and more flirtatious? Was Mr. Solo’s decision to enclose a certain pamphlet really the act of a gentleman? And most importantly: would marriage to each other really be such an unenviable fate … or might it be a love match after all?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,025
    Chapters:
    3/5
    Comments:
    110
    Kudos:
    131
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,723

    18 Jun 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Draco Malfoy leads a quiet, solitary existence. He's comfortable that way.

    Until a new neighbour moves in next door and takes centre stage in the story of his life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,549
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    401
    Kudos:
    2,460
    Bookmarks:
    564
    Hits:
    43,396

    10 Jun 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    After years, Lucius Malfoy thought he could have a peaceful life, alone. He learned how to take care of himself, found comfort in the small things, and then Minister for Magic Kingsley Shacklebolt signs the Pureblood Marriage Law. Lucius is suddenly drawn back into the world, this time with a sly, seditious wife he did not ask for. The allure of the chaos of his past, and the fact Lady Malfoy wants to overthrow the government, is far too tempting to ignore. Maybe old dogs can learn new tricks, after all.

    My first and only attempt on the Marriage Law trope. Slow burn, lots of political maneuvering, and Lucius Malfoy being a god of sex.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    221,870
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    565
    Kudos:
    1,514
    Bookmarks:
    503
    Hits:
    56,117

    14 May 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    If there’s one thing Hermione Granger is good at, it’s using magic to fix her problems. And this time, her problem is sex.

    Luckily, she has the perfect solution: a locket enchanted with the Patented Daydream Charm. Whenever she opens it, she’ll find herself in Dreamland, where she can live out all her filthiest fantasies risk-free.

    The magic is a bit tricky, though. For some reason, Malfoy keeps showing up there with her. Thank goodness it’s only an illusion—if that was really him, she would never live it down.

    Meanwhile, Draco is determined to figure out who the fuck is cursing him to suffer through highly realistic, erotic hallucinations of his secret childhood crush. When he finds the culprit, there will be hell to pay.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    229,631
    Chapters:
    39/39
    Collections:
    19
    Comments:
    5,400
    Kudos:
    18,934
    Bookmarks:
    6,048
    Hits:
    1,103,579

    05 Apr 2025

  6. Public Bookmark 84

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    When Rey shuts their bond after the Battle of Crait, Kylo Ren shuts it right back. When she reaches out to him one quiet night, it’s too little too late. He keeps the bond closed.

    Despondent and isolated as the Supreme Leader of the First Order, he finally decides to take his own advice and let the past die. He’ll escape. Disguise his identity and take a shuttle to the remote reaches of the galaxy, where he can live free of the responsibilities he never wanted in the first place.

    But while he thinks he’s taken care of each and every detail, he’s forgotten one thing.

    The Force has a mysterious sense of humor--and Ben Solo doesn't stand a chance.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,606
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    304
    Kudos:
    365
    Bookmarks:
    84
    Hits:
    6,561

    16 Mar 2025

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    “Glee was the last thing she felt staring into the empty eyes that should have been a bright grey. His face had always looked pointed and sharp, but now that gave way to gauntness. His hair, which he had been so particular about in school, hung long and limp. It reminded her of how his father had looked in his mugshot. How he had wanted to be just like his father growing up. And now he was, maybe more than ever.
    A ghost.”

    After doing more than her fair share in saving the Wizarding World and bearing the scars of what it cost, Hermione Granger thinks she has earned herself a little respite. But when a charismatic albeit chaotic Theodore Nott convinces her to use an old law to save a dear friend who is about to meet the Dementor’s Kiss, she simply cannot stand by and watch. Follow Hermione as she navigates a world that still believes in blood status, a marriage to save the life of an old enemy and the hurt that comes with surviving.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    162,244
    Chapters:
    31/31
    Comments:
    3,959
    Kudos:
    12,848
    Bookmarks:
    4,436
    Hits:
    579,678

    28 Dec 2024

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In an attempt to find a sense of purpose following the war, Hermione rejoins The Order as they investigate a splinter cell of Voldemort loyalists. With barely-healed emotional wounds threatening to open as she heads back into danger, Hermione is desperate for something or someone to keep her grounded. That need leads her to find solace in an unlikely place.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    171,848
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    1,673
    Kudos:
    2,872
    Bookmarks:
    1,989
    Hits:
    193,927

    10 Dec 2024

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there… killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.

    This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.

    When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.

    How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part…)?

    Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    250,249
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    2,548
    Kudos:
    3,953
    Bookmarks:
    2,471
    Hits:
    238,532

    07 Dec 2024

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Five years after the Battle of Hogwarts the Ministry of Magic has one more wizard to bring to trial: Draco Malfoy. However, it's not a trial they're after, it's a spectacle to celebrate the end of the Death Eater regime with the execution of their final prisoner. When Hermione realizes their plan, she halts the trial and invokes The Gallows Law — an ancient law that pardons any pureblood male without an heir if a witch will marry him.

    What Hermione isn't ready for is the reality of bonding a broken, shell of a wizard and her new life as she moves into Malfoy Manor as the new Lady Malfoy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,332
    Chapters:
    23/23
    Comments:
    2,963
    Kudos:
    19,748
    Bookmarks:
    5,600
    Hits:
    590,598

    04 Oct 2024

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “There’s no polite way to say this,” a deep voice mumbles over the phone. “I need someone who can take a lot.”

    “Could you be more specific?” Rose asks him, politely disinterested in whatever it is he’s trying to ask for.

    “I, um. I need a woman who can handle someone of above average size.”

    ---

    Ben hires an escort to help him with a big problem of his.

    Namely, that his size has kept him from ever technically losing his V card.

    OR: about 14,800 words, 11,600 of which are smut

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,816
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    420
    Kudos:
    1,834
    Bookmarks:
    447
    Hits:
    34,381

    03 Aug 2024

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    After a potions accident at fifteen, Draco must resign himself to living with an affliction for which there is no cure. Written for the 2021 Deflower Draco Fest.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,940
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    158
    Kudos:
    3,025
    Bookmarks:
    715
    Hits:
    60,552

    22 Jul 2024

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hermione waited for him to open his eyes and slipped her fingertips between the buttons of his shirt again. The guarded expression reappeared on Draco's face. He searched hers, and when she smiled at the same time as she stroked over his scales, he exhaled heavily.

    "I'm—"

    "Half a dragon, I know." Hermione pulled his shirt out of his trousers and flicked the bottommost button open.

    "—not fully human."

    "I figured that out when I felt the scales." She looked down and opened the next button. His lower torso shimmered in the ambient lighting as he flexed his abdomen involuntarily. Her breath caught. "Beautiful."

    He put his fingers under her chin and tipped her head up until he caught her eyes. "I'm not fully human, Hermione."

    Finally, it clicked.

     

    Written for the DHr Monsterfucking Fest 2021. What it says on the tin.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,221
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    12
    Comments:
    248
    Kudos:
    2,974
    Bookmarks:
    746
    Hits:
    69,779

    18 Jul 2024

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Hermione tilted her head, taking a step back to look him up and down. “Draco Malfoy, is this your first time?”
    He winced reflexively but he tried to cover it up immediately by shaking his head. “Of course not,” he scoffed.
    .
    .
    Written for the Deflower Draco Fest 2021 🌺

    I never thought anyone would brave so much explicit smut but... GUYS. GUYS! ETL Echo did it! They podficced my story and it's so good, so check it out and leave them some love 💚💚💚: ETL Echo's podfic

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,999
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    130
    Kudos:
    1,337
    Bookmarks:
    289
    Hits:
    23,282

    18 Jul 2024

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Harry,” Hermione began, voice very controlled, but she could feel the blade of panic slicing at her vocal cords. “Why was Draco Malfoy just screaming bloody murder about his,” and the word almost strangled her as she said it, “wife?”

    Harry's green eyes blew wide. Healer Lucas pinched the bridge of her nose, clearly displeased with the recent series of events.

    “He was referring to you, my dear,” she said. “That was the other question you got wrong. Your name is Hermione Jean Granger-Malfoy.”

    Hermione had to be sedated again.

    [In which Hermione loses the last six year's worth of her memories, including the entirety of her relationship and marriage to Draco.]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    94,946
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    177
    Comments:
    4,165
    Kudos:
    36,400
    Bookmarks:
    12,695
    Hits:
    1,326,504

    04 Jul 2024

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    She shouldn’t have seen it.

    She wasn’t supposed to have seen it.

    He’d only been tugging his jumper off, the pub walls almost sweating from the number of bodies inside, when she’d caught a glimpse of gold from the corner of her eye. Her attention snagged and she looked. She’d only seen it for half a second before he had tugged his t-shirt back down, the knit of his navy jumper having brought the white cotton along for the ride. It was gone just as quickly as she’d seen it but that tiny flicker of something kept her eyes searching around.

    She was sure of what she’d seen — what else could it have been? — but the person upon which she’d seen that flash of metal didn’t compute.

    There was no way that Draco Malfoy had a piercing. And not there.

    ---

    Or, Hermione learns that Draco has a navel piercing and can’t handle it

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,021
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    215
    Kudos:
    2,522
    Bookmarks:
    533
    Hits:
    40,549

    26 May 2024

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Malfoy buckled, barely catching himself with a hand on her bureau by the door, spine curling in and head dropping.

    Oh fuck,” he groaned. “What are you doing to me?”

    His voice reminded her of her extremely-not-alone status and she gained enough sense to yank the covers up, the toy slipping to buzz silently against her inner thigh.

    “I’m not…not doing anything!” It wasn’t even the first thing she should have said (“Get the fuck out, Malfoy!” certainly would have been more appropriate) but her brain was only half with her.

    ---

    Or, they were roommates with unrequited crushes and meddling friends.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,517
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    218
    Kudos:
    3,208
    Bookmarks:
    713
    Hits:
    75,157

    25 May 2024

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Hi,” he said, raising a hand in greeting. “My name is Scorpius. I’m your son.”

    He had to give his dad credit: his ability to not visibly react to shocking news was exemplary.

    Draco blinked, eyes narrowing slightly and then flitting over Scorpius features. Scorpius had taken after the Malfoy line more than the Granger, his hair and eyes and stature a dead match for his dad’s (though he’d been lucky to scrape a few extra melanin genes from his mum). He smiled politely, awaiting his verdict.

    “But you’re…” Draco tilted his head. “My age.”

    “Ah, right.” Scorpius took a few steps closer, reeling up the Time Turner so it swung innocently in the air between them. “Turns out these are trickier to calibrate than I thought.”

    ———

    Or, seventeen-year-old Scorpius Granger-Malfoy steals a Time Turner and accidentally goes back twenty years.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,943
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    333
    Kudos:
    5,009
    Bookmarks:
    877
    Hits:
    41,271

    25 May 2024

  19. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    She gave him a friendly smile, heart hammering.

    He returned it, popping out an earbud. “Hey.”

    She’d heard his voice from across the gym countless times but never directed toward her. She felt like an idiot for being so affected by it.

    “Hi.” She felt breathless and knew it wasn’t from the jogging. She sought about for something else to say to keep him looking at her. “Where’re your friends?”

    He raised a brow, lips twitching up into his typical half-smile. “Oh? One of them in particular?”

    She couldn’t help her automatic scoff. Sure, they were handsome, too, but she’d had her eyes set only on him since the get go and neither the tall-and-dark nor the curly-haired man could compete.

    His grin widened at her reaction. “They’ll be devastated to hear that you made that sound.”

    ---

    Or, Hermione finds a compelling reason to get a gym membership

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,216
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    2,584
    Bookmarks:
    480
    Hits:
    49,077

    24 May 2024

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “I thought we could play a variation,” he said smoothly. “As, apparently, my ideas are brilliant.”

    She snorted as derisively as she could, earning a chuckle. She almost didn’t want to know but couldn’t help herself — not with anything when it came to him.

    “What variation?”

    “Touching is vital in this game, isn’t that what you said?” His tone was excessively innocent. “So I propose we get the same position instructions, but if you choose a dot which doesn’t lead to you touching me, then you take something off.”

    She frowned at the mat, processing that, then turned a skeptical look up at him over her shoulder. “Are you suggesting we play strip Twister?”

    He smiled indulgently. “Only if you don’t want to touch me.”

    ---

    Or, Draco returns home to find his roommate playing Twister and gets an idea.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,500
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    1,597
    Bookmarks:
    267
    Hits:
    22,528

    24 May 2024

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