Chapter 1: I never thought the universe hated me so much (but then I met you)
Chapter Text
2014
Oliver Stark was new in this ambient. He did want to get a job in Usa. Maybe not for the right reasons but still.
When it came to love someone he notice how much he will give himself for them.
He didn’t want to let her go just because she was visiting London and Oliver did get in love with her.
Even if she was an actress, he wanted to go with her and live with her.
So, he did what he could. He saw on Internet there was a part as the main character with Jennifer Lopez in this new thriller movie.
He download the script and sent his audition to the address they write about.
He was sure as hell he got the role.
One thing he was sure about that him as a villain is perfect. Maybe because his true personality was a little evil when it comes to be with other people.
But whatever, he just have to wait for his agent to call him and said he’s got the part. No matter how much he has to wait for the respond.
SOMETIME LATER…
“Oliver, can I speak to you?”
Oliver was thrilled to his agent’s call. He was almost losing hope. But not really.
“So, did I got the part or not?” Oliver didn’t want to waste his time any farther.
His girlfriend was leaving two days after, and he has to get a job before that. He didn’t want to live with her and except her to buy everything.
He was a feminist but also a gentleman. He believe in equality not just being a trophy boyfriend or other stuff.
“Unfortunately, no. They give your part to another actor…”
What?
“What the hell are you’re talking about? Who was better than me?!” He was a little angry.
Who the hell was better than him to get this role?!
“Ryan Guzman”
Oliver mind just said what he told at his agent:
“Who?”
SUMMER OF 2018…
As a new tv star of Ryan Murphy show called “9-1-1”, Oliver was living his beat life in LA towards these years with his American girlfriend.
Season 1 went so well that people wanted to know more about Buck story after what happened with Abby, but also Oliver made new friends and find a family even with Aisha, Kenneth and his father figure Peter.
Also, adjusting his life in Usa was a little hard respect of his home. Especially in the show biz of Hollywood. He knew maybe he will never be a movie star but being in two hit shows as “Into the ballads” and “9-1-1” was a great opportunity.
Maybe he still blames that Guzman guy back then but he was living a happy life. Enjoying this Buck character so far.
What he never thought to happen, it was a change of writers as Tim Minear, a long time friend of Murphy, will take the lead of season 2.
Even though, getting to know this Tim guy wasn’t so bad and he did want to give Buck a back storyline starting with casting his big sister Maddie.
Oliver was happy about it. Especially when Tim told him that his sister would be play by Jennifer Love Hewitt.
He was a huge fan of her.
When he read the script at his home, he never thought Buck would get even a new friend.
A new probie who Buck would get jealous about.
Nothing so serious about until he saw the name who this Eddie guy would be and Oliver never believe in karma or universe’s irony but he was sure to believe in it now:
EDDIE DIAZ played by RYAN GUZMAN.
As the scenes went by, maybe some resentment Buck felt for Eddie was real as Oliver did felt a little threat by Ryan.
He never wanted to watch that movie Ryan stole his role for back in 2015. For his pride only.
However, Oliver must admit that this Ryan guy was good at acting. Especially, when it came to the gym scene or when it comes to be a paramedic.
He kinda feel like Eddie being a veteran medic was perfect for Ryan.
Something Oliver must admit to his sake though.
Anyway, it’s not like Oliver hates Ryan as Buck doesn’t really hate Eddie.
Sure, the all scene where Buck watch Eddie for the first time with “What a man” played in the background feels more like Buck got a crush for him.
Something Oliver wondered if Buck was meant to be bisexual from season 1, but he never wanted to make a business.
But anyway when he met Ryan he just shakes his hand saying hello.
Ryan just appear to have the most beautiful smile Oliver ever saw in a person.
After taking a picture with him from the first time, he couldn’t help but wonder how he never met Ryan before.
Oliver just finds him really interesting.
From scene to scene they never ending to talk. To talk about everything.
Even the movie thing.
“Oh, I’m sorry about that man. Actually, if I could go back at time I wouldn’t sent my audition for that role”
He said being really sorry about that.
Oliver doesn’t understand why though.
“No worry, mate. I think you killed it. Actually, I’m pretty sure you did as you’re doing now. You really good at playing Eddie”
If someone else maybe was watching, maybe they could say Oliver was being soft and smiling at the new guy.
Something that never happened in his career, expect for Aisha. She just a goddess for him.
Ryan just looked at him, not expecting the word “mate” maybe.
“Wait, you’re British?”
“Yes, I am”
“Wow, i never thought about it. Your American accent is really great”
And even every interviews told him exactly the same thing, he couldn’t help but exploding in a full smile.
What does it mean to him personally he doesn’t get it.
But maybe as he said he just made a new mate as they both smile as they were happy about something they didn’t get yet.
2016
As Ryan was enjoying the success he got from the last two Step up movies, The boy next door and Everybody wants some, he was getting a really tired of the show biz life.
He was still grateful to God for the jobs he got but really living your life hiding your true self was making him feel miserable.
All the fakes one, the missing opportunities, he really wanted to escape at some point.
If it wasn’t for his art maybe his mind would seriously get sadder day by day.
He really liked Tyler…
Fuck. He shouldn’t think about him.
Not when he tried to take a bath at his new home in LA.
They were just friends. The fact he had to share an hotel room with him and maybe sleep together sometimes doesn’t mean he’s gay or he has had gay thoughts about his coworker too.
He’s fine.
He just have to find a new job and forget about all of this.
After what he did in the last movie, Ryan is bit ashamed of himself. Sure, one thing is to act and completely forget about yourself.
But he couldn’t help but notice how he didn’t like that character at all.
Also, he wanted to kiss Tyler so bad in the scene where they had to do a game with the girls at a party and watched them kiss each other. When it came to them, he went full gay panic attack as he wanted to kiss him.
But as the script said, they didn’t.
As Tyler decide they weren’t friends anymore because he notices Ryan wanted more from him that just being friends. Platonic friends.
Fuck his life.
SUMMER OF 2018…
As life was getting better, Ryan get a new girlfriend and a new role in a tv show called “9-1-1”. He didn’t even auditioned for it but this Tim Minear guy wanted him so much and he said he write this new character Eddie Diaz just for him.
Ryan felt really flatter by that.
As he approached the set, he felt like it was at home in someways.
Aisha was really kind and he felt like he will never got tired of her.
Kenneth was like a found brother to him.
Peter was like a father.
It took just one day at set to feel how they kind find a family in there.
There’s was just one tiny little problem.
His coworker and Eddie future friend, Oliver Stark.
Sure, at first he thought Oliver hate him for some reasons as Buck was hating Eddie too.
But once they started to talk and listen why he might felt threat by Ryan. It found it funny and a little bit stupid but not in a mean way.
But then he saw Oliver smile and he couldn’t help to feel something inside his heart getting warm just by the hearing.
Also, he’s British and he has those beautiful blue eyes wich Ryan wanted to look at all day.
No.
No, he shouldn’t.
He shouldn’t feel about Oliver like this.
Not after what he done to get past Tyler and getting with Christie. His girlfriend. Who things are going really great.
Really really great. Maybe if he asked her to marry him, these feelings will go away.
They always go away.
Especially after what he did to make them go away.
But he can’t go there anymore. After all the therapy sessions and getting connected to God more, he should be grateful about his life day by day.
That’s it.
Also, maybe he and Oliver would split up after these season.
It’s not like Eddie is meant to be in this show forever anyway.
Chapter 2: I wanna be yours but I don't know in what way yet.
Summary:
Ryan invites Oliver to see the Lakers game with him and his girlfriend. What could possibly go wrong?
Or
A night at the club with his new coworkers makes drunk Ryan says a thing to Oliver he will regret sober.
Chapter Text
JANUARY OF 2019
“Hey Ryan! There’re you are!” yelled Tracie, hugging Ryan when he enter at the club.
Ryan was enjoy his time with his new cast.
He was invited to drink something with Oliver, Aisha, Kenneth and Tracie.
His fiancée didn’t want to go with him though.
He doesn’t get why she always against him to make new friends.
“Why you need them if you have me!” She always says.
Ryan wanted to fight her more about it but he always hand up to reassure her when she cry.
Ryan is always alone when it comes to hang out with them.
When it comes to interviews though, she would always make Ryan know she’s there.
And maybe he knows why…
SEPTEMBER OF 2018
Ryan never thought his character was responding so good from the audience.
Everyone on the social medial was loving Eddie Diaz and his son, Christopher.
Ryan was happy. He didn’t just got a kid, a real kid to be a dad too.
Gavin was a true joy. He kinda feel like he really got a kid of his own.
Maybe one day he will really did.
But also, he never thought he would be ship with Oliver’s character, Buck.
They even joke on instagram that their ship name will be Buddie.
Ryan is not opposed to it.
“Handsome guy. There you go”
When it comes to be subtle about getting a crush to his new coworker, Ryan just sucks.
They were live on Facebook with Oliver phone in his hand.
But he couldn’t help it.
Even with a Christmas hat he would be really beautiful.
“Really?” Oliver was surprise of his answer almost as him.
“Yeah”
And maybe, just maybe, Ryan knew from that day he could joke about saying how handsome Oliver is.
Just so, this little man crush he has for him would go away.
JANUARY OF 2019
Oliver learnt from his British heritage that drinking more than one beer in a bar is something so chill and harmless.
He doesn’t know when he get actually drunk or just a little bit tipsy.
But as he was sitting in this club with his favorite cast members as Ryan too.
He understand why people don’t drink so much in public.
So, yeah maybe Ryan was a bit clingy over his body.
Like really touchy and almost like he was flirting with him.
But Oliver doesn’t care because every time Ryan touch him is like is turning on something in him that he never thought it was possible.
Everyone notice it maybe but they didn’t care enough to say anything.
It’s normal in the actors industry to be a little gay for your coworkers but in the end you marry a woman or a man and thanks to some really good PR story, they all forget about the rumors and they just envy the new married couple as they were soulmates.
At least, it was what Oliver was trying to do when Ryan told him he asked Christie or Christine to get engage.
But anyway, he has girlfriend so he shouldn’t care so much who Ryan wants to marry or fuck anyway.
“Oli, can I tell you a secret?” Ryan whispered on his ear while they were still sitting on the club table while the other went to dance.
Oli.
He loved that.
“Tell me” he replied curious.
“I would love that Eddie kiss Buck on the lips” Oliver smirk.
It’s not really a secret because they both want Buddie to be canon but he doesn’t want to break Ryan dream.
“I would love that too, mate”
Ryan was rolling his eyes at the “mate” mention.
“You know, I think it will happen. Next season…” Ryan kept talking, being so close to Oliver that he was question if they haven’t have a personal space before.
Maybe not.
“Mmh”
“So, since we’ll probably have the canon Buddie script. Why don’t we practice it..”
Maybe Oliver was getting it wrong.
Maybe was really the alcohol because there’s no way Ryan was actually asking him to…
“What would we actually practice about…”
“The kiss…”
Oliver mind never felt so drunk as it was now.
OCTOBER OF 2018
“Hy Oliver. It’s me. Ryan. Listen, I happened to get four tickets for the Lakers game match and I. I wanted to know if you and your girlfriend wanted go with me and Christy….”
Oliver didn’t get why Ryan was so nervous about over the phone.
It’s not like Oliver would ever say no to him.
Between interviews and shooting scenes, Oliver got fond about the guy.
He does’t get why but even his girlfriend, Hannah, told him she was tired of hearing about Ryan Guzman or to see his movies with him.
She was rude for Oliver taste.
“Hey mate! Sure, I’ll check if Hannah is free. But I will be there for sure for the Lakers”
‘And for you’ he doesn’t add.
“Bien. Then, I will give your ticket tomorrow at set”
Oliver likes when he talks in Spanish.
“Splendid. I’ll count the days before the match” Ryan just laugh at that.
God, Oliver would do anything to hear his smile. Especially if it’s him that makes him smile.
“I’ll count the days too”
Oh.
Yeah, Ryan is his new favorite person for sure.
Oliver did a mistake. He shouldn’t have to go alone with them.
What he was thinking anyway?
“Guys, thank you for tonight. But my Uber is coming so…I’ll go” he was lying because he didn’t called no Uber but he needs anything to go away from them.
Especially from her.
“Are you sure? Don’t you want a ride at home?” Ryan asked almost as he was really worried about him.
How someone so kind as him was with someone so evil like her.
Christy looked at him as she wanted to murder him.
Oliver hates her so much.
“Honey, he just said he called a Uber”
And if she thought Oliver didn’t heard her, she was wrong.
“Mi amor, I heard him but it’s late and it’s dangerous going alone at night”
Christy was snorting and Oliver really wanted her dead for no reasons at all.
“Ry, don’t worry. I can take care of myself - Ryan got surprised by the nickname - Besides I think your girlfriend want to say that she wants to spend the night, doing naughty things to you, am I right?”
As Oliver got off guard both of them, he smirked of what he just did.
Sometimes Americans are so easy to get embarrassed about.
“R-Right. Yeah” said Christy with a faint of voice.
“So, spend the night together” he blink at the couple as he saw Ryan completely confused expression ever.
But he need to go, he didn’t want to interrupted anymore whatever his coworker and his girlfriend want to do about.
So, he salute them with his hand as he went far away so to actually called a Uber to come back home.
When it arrived, he spent all the ride wonder why he felt so jealous at seeing them so cozy together at the match.
Why did it bother him so much that Ryan hand was around her shoulder.
Why he felt a third wheel when he could actually called his girlfriend or text her how the match was going without thinking about them.
But he couldn’t.
He felt like he wanted to be at Christy place somehow.
But his mind didn’t want to go there because the answer to that question would probably open another thing Oliver had ever wonder about himself toward the years.
Maybe it was just jealousy because Ryan is his friend.
Friends get jealous about girlfriends and boyfriends.
It’s a normal thing to feel.
That’s all.
Chapter 3: The night we couldn't quite forget
Summary:
Hannah left Oliver because she got jealous of his friendship with Ryan and Oliver goes to Ryan to find comfort.
What it could possible happen?
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
MARCH OF 2019
From that night, Oliver didn’t know how to act with Ryan anymore.
Sure, it’s not like things went embarrassed. Ryan just asked him a really valid thing.
Just a kiss between him and Eddie.
But it doesn’t matter because as soon they got the scripts for season 3, they both know Buddie wasn’t going to happened yet.
Also, Ryan got married with Christine or whatever her name is.
It’s not like Ryan really wanted to kiss him.
That’s all.
But then why when he watch his new best friend taking his marriage vows to her.
It was like something was ripping his soul apart?
NOVEMBER OF 2019
Admitting that something changed between Ryan and him, it’s not something Oliver is proud of.
Maybe it was the fact that Ryan was on his side when his ex girlfriend, Hannah broke up with him some months ago.
Funny that the reason of that was how much Ryan entered in Oliver life that he actually forgot about everything else.
Not his work but Ryan was a part of his work schedule so.
Anyway, what he learnt from his last relationship is to work on himself and be better at loving the next one.
So, he became vegan and worked on his body at gym.
Posting some thirsty pics of his works out on his Instagram stories, maybe with the intention of making Ryan looked at him.
Adopting two dogs who he learnt to love them as they were his kids.
And just for this month, or actually because Ryan get on his mind to get a buzz cut as him.
He cut his hair and he found a new girlfriend to live with.
But anyway who’s counting?
MARCH OF 2019
Ryan fucked up. That’s it. How could he possible be so stupid to ask Oliver to practice for something he would never happen?
His true desires needs to be stopped.
That’s why he married Christy sooner than later.
He needs to straight up with a wife and have some kids to become a man.
He needs to stop with these feelings.
NOVEMBER OF 2019
Saying that Ryan tried to avoid his feelings for Oliver is an understatement.
Sure, he love his wife. He can’t be more happy about of her pregnancy and soon he became a father.
But Oliver needed him.
After that bitch of his girlfriend left him, which Ryan would never get.
How could you leave Oli?
If Ryan was on Hannah place he would never…
No, he can’t go there.
He shouldn’t remember what he did that night when Oliver went at his place to find comfort from his friend.
But what he could do was starting a vegan diet and paint of him in secret on his studio.
Oliver knew just the diet thing though.
SOME MONTHS BEFORE
“Ry, i just don’t understand…”
Seeing Oliver so broke and fragile, talking with him on his couch.
Being so vulnerable on his arms.
Ryan is not being a strong man but he has to.
For his friend.
“I gave her everything. I…I left my country to be with her and she just…”
Dios, how could she be so evil?
“She doesn’t deserve you, Oli”
Hearing this nickname again after that night, makes Oliver wonder why Ryan choose to call him in a so sweet manner just when they’re so close together.
“Honestly, it’s her mistake. Because you’re so bright and funny and spontaneous - Oliver smile a bit - You give everything for the people you love as you did, for her. How could she be so blind, I don’t get it”
“She said one of the reasons she broke up with me. It’s because she was becoming more famous than me, with the things we do.”
“Oh that’s bullshit and you know that! Just because she does a couple of it movies doesn’t mean that our show is not famous as much as them” Oliver doesn’t get why Ryan became angry all of sudden.
“Also, she became a little jealous about…Buck and Eddie”
It was a lie because what she was actually get jealous about was how much he wanted to spend his time with Ryan instead of her.
But Ryan doesn’t need to know.
“What about Buck and Eddie?”
“You know, the ship as how much would impact her personal life…with me”
“If that’s a British nice way to tell me she’s homophobic. I called it for what it is. Bullshit”
Oliver couldn’t help but laugh.
Lord, Ryan always makes him happy someways.
“I mean that - Ryan get serious - she doesn’t deserve you. Not then and not now”
Oliver wanted to ask who does deserve him.
But he couldn't.
There was something in the air which he can’t quite put a name on.
As he doesn’t know why him and Ryan were so close to each other faces.
Why there was some kind of tension that just Buck and Eddie can show on.
Maybe it was the fact he got his heart broken or maybe it was the sense of comfort he never felt before with anyone.
Expect with Ryan.
What kind of feelings were there?
“Oli…” he whispered on his friend lips.
Hoping Oliver won’t see how he was looking at his lips.
Almost tempted.
“Ry”
And maybe Ryan is not imagining how bright and beautiful his best friend blue eyes are right now.
Looking at him in the same way Ryan does when he plays Eddie.
Somehow, he doesn’t know where his feelings for Oliver start and of Eddie for Buck end.
It’s all kind of a blur as now.
As they were closing their distance. The three inches that separate Ryan of tasting Oliver lips.
He shouldn’t want it. He shouldn’t.
But for God sake how much he desires it.
“Honey! I’m home”
And how every fantasies Ryan has, they died as he heard his wife coming home.
What a fucking timing.
Notes:
Hy people,
as the tags said this is a slow burn but don't worry. They will kiss (eventually <3)Anyway, I'm hoping you're enjoying so far. I don't know how many chapters I will write but I see where this story take me <3
(P.S.: Next chapter will be a little chill before the angst though)
Chapter 4: I just hope you will be with me forever
Summary:
Tim calles Ryan about season 3 and what will hapen for Buddie future
Notes:
Happy holidays people,
i'm sorry if i take too long ot post chapters but college classes almost finished and i need to prepare for exams (crying, trhowing up, lol)Anyway, i hope you liking this story so far. Next chapter will be more angst. So prepare yourself.
Thank you so much for the kudos and comments <3<3
As always, let's wait until this hiatus takes over.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
APRIL OF 2020
“Hey Ryan, can we talk a bit?”
“Yeah”
Ryan was never scared of being called by Tim.
Honestly, Tim give him anything as this job.
But all the other times he sent to him just texts to tell him when the scripts is going to arrive. Or what he want Eddie to do as Ryan agree or not.
He had fun shooting an Eddie begins episode this year.
But whatever it was, he never thought it what he was about to tell him.
“Listen, I talked with someone on the upper highs of Fox. I’m still struggling for this season to make it happen. But I think, I can start to put some hints and finally go with my idea”
Ryan was confused because what Tim has in mind this time?
“About what?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t say it at first. I’m talking about making Buddie canon”
It hit Ryan for a moment before answering.
“How?”
“I’m happy that you asked, beautiful. First we need to set up Eddie coming out arc and realization. I thinking about Eddie getting a girlfriend as a beard and Buck character getting close with Taylor so Eddie get jealous”
“It’s really good but when do you want to this? We almost finished to film season 3”
“Oh this is going to be in next season”
Oh so Tim was already working on it.
“It’s a problem for you?”
“No. You know I think Eddie is gay so. More like. Finally! Haha”
“Funny you said that. But yeah, he’s gay and him and Buck should finally get together. Don’t you think?”
Maybe it was the way Tim said it or maybe he was just tired.
But Ryan felt like they weren’t talking about Buck and Eddie anymore.
Since, he knows Eddie is inspired by Ryan life.
But maybe he needs just to sleep, that’s all.
“Yeah, i think Buck and Eddie are THE couple. You know…”
Silence. Ryan hates silence.
“Yeah. Also, I think you should tell the news to Oliver. He will be happy too about it”
Ryan smile at the thought of his best friend being all smiley and exited about Buddie going canon next season.
“Yeah I will”
SUMMER OF 2019
“Hy Ryan, my beautiful Eddie, how are you?”
Ryan never get comfortable about Tim calling him beautiful or something else, but it doesn’t bothered him so much.
“Hey Tim, all good and you? What’s going on?”
“Listen, I’m sure my assistant send you the scripts for season 3. Also, I wanted to add that I’m kinda write Buck and Eddie in more a romantic way than before”
“Oh”
“Still subtle, since Fox didid’t give me the okay but still. I wanted to establish how much Eddie cares about Buck when it comes to Christopher”
“Yeah, i got that from the tsunami arc”
Ryan couldn’t help but smile remembering the scene.
“Yes. Also, I need to tell you that you and Oliver need to work for something else. More a hated scene…”
Wait, what’s going on?
“Hated scene?”
“Yeah, because Buck of course. He will sue the 118 team since Bobby will not take him back on the job. But the sue will cause that his lawyer make you two not talk anymore. Separating you”
Fuck.
Tim really wanted some drama then.
As Ryan looked at his email for the new scripts, a thought just appear in his mind.
Ryan just hopes that he and Oliver never fight like this as them.
APRIL OF 2020
“Now, I’m just wait on Oli”
Oliver was a man of many things but he never being so smitten and fond as he was every time Ryan called him Oli.
It was always a thing in private as it happened that one time on Ryan couch or at that bar some years back ago.
But right now, Ryan was on live. Telling everyone he was waiting for him to join in.
He really wanted to but he doesn’t know why he can’t.
“Sorry guys, Oliver texted on Twitter he wanted to join in but unfortunately he can’t”
It’s totally different. Back when they just started season 2.
They were just join each other lives and taking pictures with Oliver phone about the moments they shared together.
Being so close as Buck and Eddie are in the show.
But since this pandemic took place. They just need to be cautious and work as diligent as they can.
He broke a little his heart to not be able to enjoy it.
But he loved hearing Ryan saying that he took the place of Abby because it’s true.
What it took him under surprise was when…
“Just a kiss - Ryan breaks in a huge smile and laugh a bit, turning his cheek a little red - Just a kiss between Oliver and I. Mmh”
Oh my Lord, why he had to said it like that?
OCTOBER OF 2019
Oliver believe in a few things. One of them is his love for his character and the Diaz family.
Gavin was really awesome and the scenes he did with him. Wow, he never thought that kid could be so brave as he did.
But another thing he knew for sure. Thanks to Ryan call. It’s that Buddie was being romantic coded this season as never before.
He needed to share his reaction to the new episode “The searcher” but especially for one scene in the end.
When he read it on the script he would never believed it. But since he and Ryan worked on it on his trailer, he was sure as hell, they crush it.
So, he made a reaction video on Ista, to film this moment forever. The moment Eddie and Chris enters in Buck apartment but also in his life forever.
It’s kind of ironic how both Ryan and Gavin did the same for him.
Especially Ryan.
He just hopes nothing will ever change their dynamic some day.
Notes:
Tim knows lol
Chapter 5: Hy. I'm the problem that's why you don't want me anymore
Summary:
Ryliver divorce arc
Notes:
Happy holidays people,
first i want to say i don't know when i will add anoth chapter. I'm kind busy with college exams and with these hollydays i will see.But in the meantime, i hope you will not lose interest <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
MARCH OF 2020
If Ryan should say why he write on Twitter what he did. He did it for his wife. To honor her.
If Ryan should say the real reason of why, he knows he was wrong.
He knows in some deep level of himself that it’s wrong using that king of language. He was just tired to correct his wife’s friends about that.
He was wrong defending her. It was so wrong.
He just lost his most important friendship for her.
Aisha and Oliver…
How could he ever be able to look himself in the mirror after that.
JANUARY OF 2021
Filming the new season with your (ex) best friend is like hell on earth.
Sure, him and Oliver had to be professional and meet on his trailer to act the new intimate scene between Eddie and Buck.
But seriously, Ryan was still a little piss about Oliver because he didn’t get his point of view.
Also, for what Oliver said to him that night of summer before Covid stop them to meet and to work too apparently.
“How’s going pal? Everything okay?”
For Ryan surprise it was Kenneth to talk with him.
“I think pretty cool. Expect you know, the huge thing about me being racist. Which I’m not.”
He doesn’t know why he actually started to talk with him on their locker room set of 118.
But Ryan always felt like him and Kenneth Choi were like brothers.
“Honestly, I’m not white either. I’m half Mexican from my father. And I’m democratic. I vote every election for democracy to win. As I did for Biden last year”
“Mmh, tell me about it”
“I love my black friends. As I love Aisha with all my heart. I will never say something that could hurt her or them. And if I do, I will apologize in one second”
“I know bud, you’re always so sweet with everyone. Unless Stark guy over there - Oliver was near the truck with Peter shooting a scene - He really is a demon”
He made me smile a little but in some don’t understanding way.
“Yeah, everyone keep calling him demon but I don’t know. Oli never seemed to me so evil as everyone says.”
“That’s because he has a soft spot for you. And only you.” He smirk.
“Yeah, good joke.”
“The fact that you can’t see it. Makes you an idiot as much as him. But whatever fight you two lovebirds have going on. I’m sure you will resolve it.”
Lovebirds?
“What…Kenny, I don’t know what you’re talking about but I don’t think me and Oli will be friends again after this…”
For his fault at least.
“Listen Ryan, I know you have a wife. A wife that make you say something you didn’t want to. Make you look like a racist piece of shit. Thing that you aren’t by the way. I’m in this show biz life more years than you but one thing that I learnt about all these fakes people is who really hate me just because of the color of my skin. And you’re not one of them.”
“Or because they can’t stand black or asian people to change work after work. At the end, they end up jobless. Because one thing of this fake world that is true. It’s that one day they care about in what country did you born and what role you should do base on that. And the other one diversity win and people like us can work as white people can. Doing their same jobs. Murphy industry was always about diversity. From Glee until now with 9-1-1.”
“And sure, you joke about with her friends about people of color but you are one of them. Black people can joke about slur words with each other why if you do is different? It’s because you’re white pass? It’s because people love your character so much that they can’t accept the fact you’re human and you make mistakes as all of us do every day of this life? But one thing is sure is the fact that you really deeply sorry for what you did. And i know you will find a way to make it worth it with Aisha.”
Ryan couldn’t believe Kenny words. It’s like he’s the only one understanding him.
“And also, I know you and Oliver aren’t over just because in all the time you talked about him you kept calling him Oli. A nickname I heard you called him about just one time at that bar some years ago and you two were like glue to each other as Buck and Eddie are.”
“That-That’s totally different…” he blushed at Kenny assumption.
“Yeah, and I was born yesterday.”
Okay, maybe Ryan is freaking out a little after all.
But he just hopes in the making this new season. He can find a way to make it up to Aisha.
Maybe even Oli, if they can stop arguing for once.
SUMMER OF 2020
If Oliver was piss over what Ryan did, it shows.
From the last few months thanks also for Covid precautions he could completely avoid him and his evil wife.
The ding on his door was telling him something else.
“Hy”
“Hy”
“Can we talk?”
“Sure. Come in”
If Oliver was a little bit more hurtles for Ryan. He would never be in this place right now.
“Listen, I know why you replied on Twitter for what I said to defend Christie. And I get it, man. I really do. But why you shouting me out of your life like this? Did I really did something I can’t repay our friendship for?”
Oliver smirk.
“You know you did something wrong, don’t you? I can’t have a friend who’s racist.”
“I’m not! I’m not racist! Just because I didn’t know it was wrong when her friends did, it doesn’t make me like them!”
“Sure, keep on telling yourself that”
If Ryan was angry before he was sure right now.
But Oliver doesn’t care or he just pretend to not care.
Because he doesn’t want to admit that something was changing about their dynamics way before all of this.
But that doesn’t mean it still hurt that Ryan would defend that evil woman from this.
“Why!? Why are you this! Why you’re made at me so much?!”
“Because! Because you defend her to something she is indefensible for! And you still can’t see it!”
Rage. Ryan eyes were full of rage and hurt.
“You know that for the people you love you would do anything! Even saying the wrong thing…”
Oliver laugh.
“Yeah, that would be true if you really love her. But we both know it’s not true…”
It was a second, a blink of eyes and Ryan was taking Oliver by his shirt.
Completely mad at him.
“And what do you know about love!? Tell me! Because you being manipulate by someone who would never be 100% with you! And know you’e trying to fill something with this new relationship but we both know it’s not gonna end well!”
A dry smile cover his lips.
“Are we talking about me or about you? Because if I recall you’re the one who’s being manipulate by your evil wife. And you’re trying with your kid to fulfill something inside you. But we both know as you said, they’re not gonna fulfill the void you have in your heart…”
“I’m happy of having Mateo.”
“I’m sure you do. As you’re happy to be with Gavin. But that does’t respond to the question, doesn’t it?”
And maybe if it wasn’t for the rage they’re both feeling right now. They would sense this strange tension they have right now.
No. Not right now.
What they both had from the past three years of friendship.
Between asking of kissing their lips and the strange feelings Oliver gets every time he doesn’t want to deny Ryan when he ask.
What is this feeling they can’t put a name on?
What was happen between them to feel they were fallen apart?
Oliver just know that whatever that moment was. It was crush by Ryan ring phone he has for his evil wife.
Of course it’s her calling.
“Answer the phone” he said.
Ryan take his hand off him. Calming down.
He did as Oliver said. Answering the phone.
Christie just told him to come back home.
He did after keep on saying at Oliver that they weren’t finish to talk.
But for what it worth, for Oliver, they said all they had to say.
That’s why he will keep on avoid him except fro work.
It’s just suck to know from Ryan, him and Buck are going to be canon next season.
FEBRUARY OF 2021
“How you’re doing Stark?”
Aisha and him form the past few months decide to hang out and drink something in a bar or at Oliver house.
The fact that they had to shot an episode and a crossover one is was just a favor.
“Well, pretty well. I think. And you my darling?”
“I think the one keep on looking at Ryan. Just tell me you’re not over him as you keep say.”
It took him off guard.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t look at my coworker in any strange way at all.”
“Yep, keep that line on you, bud. But really. It’s like you’re a dog moping around him and trying to stay mad at him for something I appreciate about. But Ryan came to me the other day, and told me he was really sorry about what he did.”
“And what? You believe him?! Just because he apologized!?”
Aisha hit him in the head.
“Ouch.”
“I’m not stupid kid. I know he messed up. But I also know he’s trying to make it up to me from months! So, I’ll give him a chance and if he mess up again. I will completely shut him out of my life.”
“It’s very mature of you”
“That’s the answer. Even though I don’t understand why you’re not doing the same.”
Yeah, that’s the question.
Why Oliver was still so hurt by Ryan words.
Maybe he knows the answer.
He just can’t going there though.
Aisha understand the sudden silence from him and the she kept talking.
“You know, I heard from Kenny he’s having problems with his wife”
Another thing Oliver was getting off guard.
“What? What kind of problems?”
“Relationship ones. Like how to educate their kids. How to be partners at all. Ryan told Kenny, she’s a monster sometimes. Making his kids watching something about Trump or republicans.”
“One thing me and Ry agree then.”
Aisha smirked.
“Sex problems too”
Oliver spit his beer on his kitchen table.
“W-What…”
“Yeah, I mean. Ryan can’t get up for her anymore. He’s tired of pretend that when they did it. It was just because she wanted to do it. He doesn’t hate having his kids. But it would be wrong to assume he was totally ready to be a father when they had Mateo.”
“I thinks that’s not true. He’s a capable dad. Even before he got Mateo, he practice his dadness with Gavin. Which he is his first child if you think about it.”
“Ah-Ah” Aisha wasn’t buying anything Oliver was saying.
“For the sex part. I knew she is evil but I could’t ever imagine like this. And I have a girlfriend. She will never make do something I don’t want to.”
“Right. Because that’s nothing to do to your huge crush on him and how people see it on the show that start to ship your characters together. Changing the narrative.” She was still smirking while drinking her margarita.
Yeah because of his huge crush on Ry.
Oh.
Wait.
“That’s not. I’m not. I’m straight.”
“So are everyone before coming out”
“Listen Aisha! This is not like Buck who I know he’s bisexual. And I can’t wait for him to realize that. But also to realize he’s in love with Eddie. This is completely different!”
“How come Buck is bisexual and you can accept it but not about you?”
“Because I’m not bi or pan! I know I like just girls.” He tries to calm down but he knows he can’t.
Something about the question was making him worry about all his world.
“And how do you know it honestly? Did you ever felt disgusted by the thought of kissing a guy?”
Oh.
“Well, no. I mean. I would feel awkward a little but then I will reject them.”
“And if that guy is Ryan would you fell disgusted about it?”
What.
“That’s-That’s totally inappropriate.”
Aisha rolled her eyes up.
“Yeah, sure. Like you don’t want to kiss him. Anyway, changing the subject. I wanted to tell you, I’m going to get marry to my fiancée.”
Now, Oliver was surprise but in a good way.
“I’m happy for you and your boyfriend.”
He said with a huge smile.
“Thank you.” She smiled back.
“When’s the wedding? Since Covid precautions and all.”
“We hope we can get marry next year. On spring.”
“I’m so happy for you”
He give her an huge hug to congratulate her.
He’s so happy for her friend and coworker.
“All right. All right. I give you the good news but now there’s the other one.”
“What bad news you want me to say?”
“First you’re invited. Obviously. But also, I invited Ryan too.”
Oh.
“It was not a coincidence I was talking about getting him a second chance. And I think, this time being with him all the time on set. It will be good for your relationship to work trough everything. Even this divorce era arc you’re keep on going on.”
Right. Because she thinks they’re like husbands fighting.
The same way Buck and Eddie were doing last season.
How ironic it is.
Notes:
Yep, they're both idiots in love with each other <3
Chapter 6: We will ever be something again?
Summary:
As it came the end pf shooting season four, Oliver is surprise by how he wasn't never alone to be a fanboy when it came to buddie.
Or
Ryan and his wife get into a fight
Notes:
Happy new year people <3
I'm sorry that I post this chapter so late, but I catch a cold after Christmas and I couldn't write at all.
WARNING: Toxic relationship, mentioned of queer baiting.
Chapter Text
END OF MAY 2021
One thing was for Oliver working with Ryan as Buck and Eddie.
Indeed, he loved how their chemistry on set didn’t alert or shift.
But another thing was he has to cohost in a music program with him.
Something he feels like he shouldn’t do but as his agent says:
“It’s for PR, mr. Stark. You need to end this beef with him for the sakes of your fans”
And Oliver can’t say no to that.
He just hoped that evil woman would’t come with them.
ON SET AT MAY 2021
Finally filming the scene where Buddie will be established made Oliver so happy.
Tim was really doing it and he can’t believe it.
What he can’t believe it too, it’s the fact that no matter how many times Oliver did try to avoid his coworker at all. He always comes back with the excuse to act some scenes together.
And yeah of course, Ryan just hasn’t a whole scene with Eddie new girlfriend Anna but also with Buck.
Buck who has to save him because they just shoot at his best friend in front of him.
Buck who has to take care of Christopher because Eddie was in the hospital.
Buck who has to wait for Anna call to know his best friend was safe and sound.
Alive.
Buck who has to wait in the hospital a bit longer with Eddie, because he has to says to him something it will change the course of their friendship forever.
And in between shooting take after take, both Oliver and Ryan knew when they rewatched the scenes, they did an amazing job.
They shows the right emotions and says all the line with the right tone.
But then why it felt so romantic when they were on the truck, covering by fake blood.
Oliver touching Ryan with his hands, making sure Eddie was still alive.
Just a moment in which their eyes met when Ryan says ‘Are you hurt?’
He really felt like his own heart was dying.
And maybe Oliver is the number one Buddie shipper.
That’s why after shooting that scene, he went on a tattoo shop.
Getting tattooed the moment Buck was leaning to take Eddie hand and posting a picture about about it.
Tons of fans were happy.
Who he didn’t think would dm him was literally his coworker about it.
RYAN GUZMAN:
Nice tattoo man! They’re soulmates in every universe <3
Oh.
He kind of forgot he wasn’t alone to wanting Buck and Eddie to be together.
END OF MAY 2021
Saying there was an awkward energy between him and Oli on the stage was probably the most true thing ever.
Sure, Ryan tried to be civil. Posting a video before go on live alone maybe was not so civil.
But he doesn’t know what to do.
Oli was his second crush after what he felt about Tyler long time ago.
He hurt so much what he said to him that day of summer but anyway they can’t stop talking about Buddie and sent videos, and fanarts to each others like the fanboys they are.
But what hurted him the most was his wife or the way they’re drifting far apart from each other.
How he could be so stupid and not see what kind of woman he married.
He doesn’t hate her yet but the more he sees how different they are the more he can’t help it but wonder if Ryan wanted so much to get married with a woman without thinking about the consequences.
Especially for his kids.
SOME HOURS BEFORE
“So what! Are you gonna do that music program without be with me!?” she asked him angry.
“You should see it coming, Christie!” Ryan had enough of her reasons.
“Oh I’m sorry that your public image has change so drastically because of me! But that’s not the way of treat your wife!”
“I don’t give a fuck that you’re my wife! That’s what you don’t understand! You broke my heart and made me appear as someone I’m not. I can’t forgive you for this!”
“Oh but you can forgive your boytoy and be with him in something special as this!”
What.
“Oliver is not my boytoy. And I didn’t forgive him either! Yet…” He tried to avoid her eye contact.
“But you want to. Oh how you do want to. It’s written in your face right now!”
“Enough!” He yelled at her making his daughter cry.
He never yelled at her like this before.
And for the scare look on her face, she didn’t expect it neither.
“I’m gonna go” he said before closing the door and trying to feel better.
But he knows something has shifted drastically between them and he doesn’t want to take the pieces of his failure.
SUMMER OF 2021
As season four end, Ryan was aspecting a call by Tim to tell him how they will proceed with Buddie.
Anything at all as the past two years taught him.
He didn’t expect at all what came with that call.
“Hey Ryan, listen. I’m so sorry. I thought. I thought if I push hard enough. We will be on the same page…” Ryan could tell Tim was a little tired and almost sad.
“What happen?”
“As always these stupids networks doesn’t have the balls on showing a queer relationship born by friendship. That’s what’s happening.”
“Oh”
“Yeah, oh. I’m sorry Ryan. I really did try but they totally block me. Fox will never make Buddie canon but we can’t lose the show either.”
“So, what will happen to Eddie and Buck?”
“I’m sorry to tell you but they will stay friends. Eddie will have a mental break down as I wanted you to have to come to term with Eddie sexuality. But they changed about being the trauma you had at war.”
“Oh i see…”
“Buck will stay with Taylor and see how that relationship will go”
Fuck, Ryan want to puke.
“And I. I will quit writing the show from this season.”
Wha the hell is going on?
“I’ll pass my role to Kristen. I think you know each other.”
Kristen?!
The one who hates Ryan for no reasons at all.
The one who would do anything to make Eddie character miserable at all!?
“Yeah, we met.”
“Good. That’s good.”
Silence. Again. Ryan hates silence.
“Tim…”
“I know beautiful. I will miss you and the entire cast a lot. But please you have to understand I can’t be accomplice to this queer bating thing. I will join Murphy and write other show with him until the waters will be good again.”
“So that’s it? We will never see these two characters be together at all?!”
“For the moment. But when Fox will end his storylines, I know they will come back to me and make Buck and Eddie happen.”
“And what if they don’t?”
“Then it was a joy to write about two best friends who coparents a kid together”
Ryan can’t believe it. As Tim hang up the phone, he went fully cry.
He can’t believe they don’t have a chance to be together.
But what mostly hurt him was he had to call Oli and tell him the truth.
Because he knows Tim will never says it to him.
He just hopes he will not hang up the phone seeing was Ryan calling.
For his surprise he didn’t.
Chapter 7: I need to move on from you but i can't
Summary:
Aisha wedding has arrived as she made his coworkers share a villa together to make out their friendship.
What they will do about it?
Notes:
WARNING: Unhealthy sex coping mecanisms. Dissociation from reality.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
MAY OF 2022
Oliver was exited to be at her best friend wedding. They might be coworkers but he started to get fond of her and she became one of her closest special persons he likes.
There was another who became as special as her and for Oliver sake, he needs to start tolerate him.
Who he didn’t want to tolerate was that evil woman of his coworker wife.
She’s just so wrong to be here with them.
She should be at home alone and taking care of her kids instead of giving that job to Ry.
Not that he and Oliver weren’t texting each other about how Ryan has become both parents figures since him and her were splitting up.
Sending him pictures about his kids while Oliver sent him pictures about his dogs.
Totally platonic pictures that’s all.
Not that Oliver wants something romantic to happen between them.
He’s not a cheater.
And he’s not gay!
Or bi whatever.
He just hate that his coworker has to be with a person that doesn’t valute him as he deserve.
That’s all.
THE FIRST NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING
Oliver should expected that Aisha was planning something when he asked him to give a second chance at Ryan.
He didn’t thought that she would literally make them share a villa alone for her wedding!
He must underestimated her.
OLIVER CHAT WITH AISHA:
OLIVER: Aisha what did you do!?
AISHA: Have fun with your man! <3
The only good thing about all of this. It’s that Ryan’s wife has to be with the other girls in another villa.
He was trying not to smile so hard when Christy said that.
SOME MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING
Ryan was exhausting. Since that huge fight he had with his wife he doesn’t know anymore if they are still together or not.
The only thing that was sure it’s the fact that Christy decided that he has to take care of his kids more time than her.
Since she always going out with her friends. Friends who Ryan doesn’t want to get involve with anymore.
Maybe it was also a good thing Kristen had taken place on the series because now his screen times is lesser and lesser everyday and she was just making Eddie miserable and sad.
Ryan love his character. So so much. Shooting these scenes where Eddie is struggling with mental health is so important to him and all the people who struggles with PTSD. He’s such a good dad and that always inspired Ryan to be a better dad for his kids too.
He might kinda help that he sent pictures to Oliver sometimes to let him know what he’s doing.
He’s always find a way to cheer him up with pictures of his dogs.
It doesn’t help at all for his crush for him.
He needs to change and he needs to move on from this thing he feels about Oli.
The first step maybe is to finally get that he doesn’t like women. Not the way he supposed to feel like.
He never did.
So maybe it’s not wrong of him to create a Grindr account and see what he was missing on his life.
He will not put an image of himself for not be recognize. Just his abs.
Maybe it was wrong lying on an account but he needs to be free of himself and his show biz life.
He needs to find a way to be himself without be recognize as an actor or something else.
He just wants to be a common man as everyone else. A very gay common man who is liking pictures of dicks they sent to him the moment he started to swipe.
He will just not meet someone on person.
And it’s not like he’s cheating.
But he just need an escape from a life he doesn’t feel anymore as his own.
THE NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING AT THE VILLA
Sharing a villa with Oliver was not a good thing at all. Aisha need some explanations of why she didn’t make him stay with her wife.
But on the other hand he doesn’t really care about it all.
He would just fight with her and scroll Grindr chats to start to feel something again.
Instead, he and Oliver were wearing white robes and share a matrimonial bed.
The villa was fine. They had even a pool for themself.
He was happy that Aisha remember he wanted to paint as he saw the colors and the canvases on the tables.
It made his heart happy knowing him and Aisha were okay after all this time.
“What these things are about? Did she want us to become artist or?” Oliver asked, lain on their bed.
“I am. Sort of. I paint sometimes as a hobby.” He was a little embarrassed to admit it.
Oliver face light up.
“Really?! Ry, how come you never told me?!”
Ry.
Oh.
“Because you never asked.”
And because his paint muse was always him.
“Well, that’s fair. I never told you about my photography.”
What?
“Oli. Now you have to tell me.”
And as nothing happens, they both lain on bed and shares their pictures about their art.
As they both realize that sometimes Oliver take pictures of Ryan as Ryan paint of Oliver.
They were both happy and smiled.
Ryan felt like they were come back before all the fighting that they had.
Like they would finally be okay this time.
But as always the moment was ruined by something he didn’t think Oliver would know.
A Grindr notify from his phone.
Ryan needs to stop to believe in fairytales at this point.
Notes:
Aisha knows too <3
Chapter 8: Am I immoral if I want you?
Summary:
Ryan and Oliver fight again but then find a way to make up.
It doesn't mean that their feelings for each other vanished.
Notes:
WARNING: mentioned of suicide attempt. Internalize homophobia.
Chapter Text
THE NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING
“How could you install that app like this?!” Oliver started to yell at him once he heard the Grindr notify.
“Don’t you think about your wife? What she would think?! You’re cheating on her for some boys!” He added.
Ryan was getting angry at him again. How could he think that they’re were good again?
“I’m not cheating on her! I just want something that feels real in this fake world I’m living in!”
“Oh so finding guys to hook up with. It’s a way to feel real for sure!”
Ryan doesn’t get why Oliver was so pissed about him.
It’s not his concern who he wants to sleep with. He made sure of that.
“It’s not your matter what I do with my life, Stark! And you should know it!”
Ryan just wanted to sleep on his side of the bed and forget all about this conversation.
“What about Christy? She knows you don’t like her anymore like that?” Really what’s his matter.
He never show interest for his love life before. Especially for the sake of his wife.
“Not that is your concern. But I think she figured it out since one day I forgot to turn off my computer and she heard the same Grindr notification you heard right now. So, yeah or this or because I don’t want to sleep with her anymore”
He doesn’t know why he just come clean to Oliver.
“Do you still like her. Christy. Do you still love her?” Really what the fuck Oliver wants from him this night.
He turn around to Oliver side and replied:
“As i said before. It’s not your problem.”
“Fine! Then keep on being immoral then!” Oliver added turn his head on the other side.
“I will. Thank you!” He turn on the other side too.
They both get sleep being angry with the other one.
Ryan calm down a little thinking tomorrow will be a good day for painting.
THE MORNING BEFORE THE WEDDING
Oliver didn’t want to wake up from his bed. He was still rethinking about what happened last night with Ryan.
Sure, he shouldn’t judge. It’s not his business if his coworker wanted to cheat his wife with men. Especially pictures of naked men from what he knows about that app.
But he doesn’t get why something inside him is screaming and crying. Telling him that Ryan should figure it out this thing with him and not with someone else.
Anyway, he saw the time from his phone and got up from the bed because whatever is feeling right now. It’s Aisha wedding day. He needs to put up a straight face for the sake of her and her husband.
To his surprise he was alone in bed.
Not that Oliver wanted Ryan to be there after what he told him last night about moral and cheating.
It still hurt his heart a bit though.
Anyway, he wakes up and turn off the coffee machine. They still got a little of time before prepare themself and all.
He drink his coffee and see that his coworker was indeed awake.
Curiosity winner him over as he approached him on the balcony, leaving his cup on the table.
He didn’t know Ryan likes painting first thing in the morning.
“Good morning” he said, he took Ryan by surprise.
“Good morning” he replied.
“What are you painting about?” Stupid question because it was clear as water that Ryan was painting the landscape but he needs to make conversation about something.
“The view…?” Oliver could felt the sarcasm on his coworker voice but still the way Ryan said it made him laugh a little.
Ryan followed him after.
Oliver doesn’t understand how a minute they’re fighting and the other are just okay like now.
“I’m sorry.” He added.
Ryan was looking just at his paint as he replied:
“For what?”
“I’m sorry for last night. I shouldn’t judge you. Just because I think cheating is not okay. That doesn’t mean someone else think about it as me. So, if you want to still be in Grindr. It’s okay for me…” Ryan smirked.
“You know. I thought me being on a gay app. It was a way to get free for my life, you know. A way to escape from the all wrong thing I did from the past year. And I know I’m still trying to get your friendship back. As Aisha one. But Dios, no sabe cuanto es difícil mentir sobre esa parte de mi.”
Oliver didn’t get the last part in Spanish.
“Can you translate for me please?” Ryan smiled.
“I said. You don’t know how hard it is to lie about this part of me. I never told anyone before but back when I was in the movies industries. While I was shooting “Everybody wants some”. I had this huge crush on my coworker, Tyler”
Oh.
“I thought back then it was just a male crush. Because he was so handsome and I got to work everyday with him. Sharing a hotel room together.”
Oliver felt a little angry about that.
“And then one night I…I tried to kiss him. In that moment I realize, I felt more than just a male crush for your coworker.”
For Lord sake.
“Long story short, it didn’t end up so well that I broke our friendship or whatever we had back then. Now, we’re strangers. Like he doesn’t want to do anything with me anymore. From that moment I thought that I should stop feel this way, you know? That I should be with a woman, married with kids. Then everything will feel normal inside myself.”
“But now what changed?”
Ryan looked at him and for a second he thought he was goin to say that Oliver made him change.
He didn’t.
“I’m tired of pretend to be this normal guy. Especially since, you know, my relationship with Christy is breaking up day after day. Before I would do anything to fix it. But now, I just saw this monster I married and I judge myself because I should know better…” Oliver sense he was on the verge of crying.
“I should know better for my kids. For myself. After I tried to…I tried to end my life before being bless with our show. And her…”
Oh God.
“Ry…It’s not your fault.” Oliver stand up, leaning closer to Ryan and touching his elbow.
“It is.” Ryan let him touched him.
“No, it’s not. And I shouldn’t blame you for what you did. You just tried to defend her in a wrong way.”
“And look what that brought me.”
“But it also brought you me!”
Oliver didn’t know what he meant by that sentence.
Ryan looked at him with some kind of hope in his eyes. Oliver doesn’t know for what though.
“It brought you me and Aisha. And Kenny and everyone of our cast! Our tv series show you how good of a father can be and you are everyday for being present and raising your kids.”
“Oli…”
“Don’t Oli me, you know I meant it. And I’m sorry for what I said that summer. You’re not a dad because you want to fill a void. You are because you’re a natural with kids. Also, amazing and kind and you would anything in your power to be a better person and make you forgive you.”
Ryan laugh a little about it.
“What I’m trying to say is. Okay, maybe you have shitty taste when it comes to women but for what you told me it’s because you don’t actually like women like that. So, it’s not your fault.”
Ryan kept on laughing and feeling a sense of calm he never felt before in this past year.
Not when he was away from the one person that makes him feel seen and in piece.
“It’s not my fault that I’m gay then?” He added like a joke but he knows it isn’t.
It was his first time admitted it to a friend though.
Oliver looked at him with wanting. He isn’t sure of what his friend wants now.
“Yeah. Yes. It’s not your fault you play for the other team.” He winked at him and Ryan just knew in that moment that the only thing he wants is him.
He doesn’t know what that means for his life yet.
“I’m sorry too.” He added.
“For what?”
“For everything. I shouldn’t be so angry with you to unfollow you on Instagram. Being so awkward toward each other other. And to not wanted to hang out with you anymore. I missed you.”
Admitting it was more hard than Ryan thought.
“Ry. I miss you too.”
They’re stupid. They’re being miserable for nothing.
“Then why we broke up? I. Oli. Sometimes I feel like we’re a pack that cannot be separate. But then we did and I felt like I miss a part of my being everyday until now.”
“I feel like this too. I never felt so connected with everyone before you. I can’t explain it but I can’t live without you.” Oliver reassure him.
“Then we should stop and be together.” Fuck. What did he just said.
“Ry, I’m not…”
“No. No like that. But. You know. Being friends again.”
“Oh.” Ryan didn’t get why Oliver felt a little down by what he said.
“Okay. To be friends then.” He added.
“Friends.” Ryan replayed even though the way he was looking at him now. He knows he just doesn’t want Oliver just as a friend.
But he would do anything to get his bestfriend back on his life. Even pretend to not wanting to kiss him as right now. Lucky for him, it was time to get ready for the wedding. It was time to think about Aisha and his husband.
Once they came back home from the wedding, he decide to uninstall Grindr and be more true about himself. Even if it meant breaking his marriage apart for good.
Chapter 9: Why you have to make me want you again?
Summary:
Ryan is struggling with getting divorce with his wife. Meanwhile he decide to live with Oliver and his girlfriend.
Oliver feels something has changed in him as he can't stop thinking about Ryan coming out to him and how much he want to feel Ryan lips on his own.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
SUMMER OF 2023
Breaking up with your wife is not so easy as Ryan thought it would be. Sure there was the all who’s getting the kids and the house thing. But if that means he could finally being in piece with himself again. They sue him if he will fight for getting his kids with him.
Also with his tv series being cancelled and changed with another network things can finally go in another direction.
He was still waiting for Tim call to be honest but anyway, he was fighting and not leaving his life anymore as a watcher.
He wanted to changed and the first step to take was unfollow his wife on social media. Easy.
The second step was a little bit hard but he needed to. He would do anything to repair what they had. Even if it meant to live his life as how he actually wanted.
So, the second step was calling Oliver and asking to come live together with him. At least until him and Christy will figure it out with the divorce papers.
It was just for practical reasons. Nothing about his huge feelings for him which he couldn’t hide anymore as he saw in many scenes from the past two seasons how much in love he was looking at Buck.
It could be because of his Buddie agenda to have some intimate scenes though Kristen blocked them up, but Ryan knows it’s not about Buddie.
Buddie is just a ship name. A way for Ryan to hide his true feelings for Oliver.
It did work well. He wanted to kiss him so bad. To be a family in this show.
Realty is when Oliver accepted him in his house there wasn’t just his dogs to wait for him.
“Hy, you must be Ryan. I heard so many things about you.”
Yeah, he was going to live with the man he secretly loves and his new girlfriend.
Kill him right now.
SEPTEMBER OF 2022
Oliver was happy. He doesn’t know why. He’s just happy that he can work at season six with Ryan.
Things were kind of heated but now he just wants to enjoy this interview from ET and maybe grub some juice with Guzman later.
It doesn’t matter that sometimes he thinks about that Ryan is gay and he want to make him explore this side of him. With his body. Fuck, he’s pathetic.
He has a girlfriend. A girlfriend who he likes. He doesn’t understand why he feels like this for his coworker.
He’s straight. He always thought he is straight. Just because he approved of him and Ryan kiss on the show for Buddie to be canon. It doesn’t mean he’s anything less than straight.
He’s an ally.
A pretty good British ally. It’s not like he lives under a bridge. He knows that sexuality can be fluid.
Especially for Buck who is bisexual. He will be his advocate for the rest of his life about his bisexuality.
But he’s not like that. He’s not. He likes women. He enjoy way too much to have sex with women.
But this thing with Ryan is. It’s just a misunderstanding. Maybe his Buck side is so in love with Eddie that he doesn’t understand anymore the difference between who’s Ryan and who’s his bestfriend on the show.
Yeah, it’s probably it.
“We’ve been working out” Ryan smirked and touched Oliver arm as it was nothing.
Not that it’s something but how could he flirt with him while on a interview. Thinking he’s not getting caught about it?
Not that Ryan shouldn’t flirt with him or with men in general.
He totally should. He likes men. Not his wife who he’s trying to get a divorce with.
So, he should totally do this.
It doesn’t matter that his heart was beating stranger than usual.
SUMMER OF 2023
Living with Ryan should feel easy. At least, it’s what he keep remind on himself.
It was just for a couple of month until Christy will finally sign the divorce papers and they decide what to do with their kids.
Speaking of kids, who we will be here with them sometimes. Just when Christy will go out with her friends.
Oliver feels a little sad about Ryan. He doesn’t get how a person so special like him doesn’t have so much friends.
Hell, Oliver felt the first time they worked together that they will be the best of friends.
But maybe it wan’t about Ryan being lonely. It was more about who Ryan left behind to be with that evil woman.
So, Oliver probably should not heard phone conversations. Especially who doesn’t concern him personally.
But it can’t help it as some nights he get up early and heard Ryan calling some people he didn’t heard about from years.
In some ways, Oliver got from the little note Ryan got when he came here. He just saw it one morning but what he read on it made Oliver heart melt for him again.
THIRD STEP TO BE A BETTER PERSON:
CALLING THE PEOPLE YOU LEFT BEHIND AND REPAIR ON YOUR FRIENDSHIPS!
He was really trying.
WINTER OF 2023
As always the call was unexpected on Ryan side. He was just chilling a little on Oliver sofa.
When his phone ring, Ryan knows who was. After all, he didn’t lose his number.
“Hello, Tim”
“Hy beautiful. So, I think you heard the news we are now on ABC. Bing changes.”
“Yeah. I think everyone knows about that.”
“Right. Anyway, I wanted to tell you first that I’m going to write again the show.”
“I was sure of it.” He tried to hide his huge smile on the phone.
“And second of all. We have the rights to make Buddie canon.”
Oh.
“H-How come?”
“Well, you know ABC is more open about this themes. Also, if they decide to pick a show is because they want give the audience what they want. And we all know who the IT subject is on our show about.”
“Yeah, we know.” Ryan was feeling happy.
“Well, then I need to speak with you and Oliver. If he’s not with you right now. Of course.”
Again Ryan felt like Tim knows something he doesn’t about them.
Anyway, it’s true Oliver is with him. He was just playing with his dogs on the garden.
A beautiful view for Ryan taste.
“Oli!” He yelled and Oliver heard him as he came back home.
“Ry, what’s wrong?”
“It’s Tim. He wants us to know the news about Buddie going canon.”
He couldn’t help but grin.
Oliver smile followed him after.
“Yes!? Ahm, Tim what’s up?”
“Happy to hear from you, Stark. Anyway, I wanted to check on you about a storyline. I mean, who wants to do what before going on the canon era.”
“If you tell us more about it maybe we can answer you.” Oliver said.
He was a little bitter for Ryan sake but he was right. What was all this mystery.
“Stick to the point as always, Stark. Anyway, I will add a new love interest. Who is a man. I think you know about Lou Ferrigno, since he worked with us back on season 2.”
“Yeah, i remember him.” Oli added.
“Good. Well my first idea is to Eddie getting to know this Tommy guy and obliviously dating him. Ending the 100th episode with a kiss from him. While Buck getting jealous of him. Of course.”
“I’m sorry Tim. But Eddie isn’t still with Marisol and Buck with Natalia?”
“Yes beautiful, but I want you to broke up off screen with her if you agree to this storyline. Of course.”
“Did Natalia actress didn’t say she didn’t want to be in new season?” Oliver spoke.
“Yeah, but it’s not a big deal. Buck and Eddie could be both single and having their feeling realization.”
“Well Tim. You know I love how you write our storylines but I don’t think Eddie is the type to date a man and kiss him. Especially after all he’s been trough.”
If Ryan was being honest, he always saw Eddie as one who waits fro the right one. He did wait for dates some women and now what? He just go out and kiss men and figure it out this part of himself without thinking about the other equation.
Who it’s Buck.
No, it’s not right.
Also, he doesn’t want to kiss another man for the first time and being Lou Ferrigno.
Even if it was just for work, he can’t do it.
Expect if that man is Oliver. For obvious reasons.
“I thought you would say that. That’s why I wanted to know your opinion. Then it’s settle. Buck will have his first boyfriend and Eddie will struggle with his relationship with Marisol.”
“Minear, can I said that maybe Buck should get jealous of Eddie either way? Just because he felt threaten by Tommy who’s trying to stole his bestfriend?” Oliver said.
“Stark, I’d say I like this idea but I was already thinking about it as I must said another thing.”
What other thing Tim has to announce?
“Since I want Eddie and Buck gettin together. I want you too to get a scene every episode of this season. Also, see Maddie and Chimney will get marry. There will be a bachelor party scene.”
“So?” They both asked.
“So, I want you too to dress as Crocket and Tubbs and you will sing karaoke together. Completely drunk. Of course.”
Wow. Tim was really doing it big.
“Okay.” The both added.
“Good. Then we’re settle. We will see you for a couple of months and get ready for interviews.”
“You know Tim. I was going to say to you that I wanted to play Buck the most bisexual way this season. I’m glad we’re on the same page here.” Oliver add.
“Oh Stark, you know that Buck is bisexual for me from season 1. Anyway, I want you too to work together as closer than before. Enjoy whatever you were doing. See you soon.”
“See you soon.” Ryan replied as Tim cut the call.
Both Oliver and Ryan looked at each other without stopping on smiling. Buddie was going to be canon and they will work as close as possible.
Ryan feelings for Oliver are so fucked.
Notes:
I love writing about Tim calls about Buddie lol
Chapter 10: Recreating a moment never goes as expected
Summary:
Once Ryan got officially divorce, he doesn't waste his chance to invite Oliver for a date and tell him about his feelings for him. He doesn't go as he planned though.
While, Oliver invited Ryan to watch a Lakers match as he did some years before. This time should feel right but as always Ryan said something that made Oliver wanted to know who Ryan has feelings for.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
MAY OF 2023
As Ryan saw before, divorce was never an easy choice. He took him a little to accustom to his new life.
Especially divorcing a person like Christy.
However, Ryan got custody of his kids even though they have to alternative their weeks to meet them.
The only sad thing was that he had to move in again in his house and end this roommate era with Oli.
But in someways it wasn’t really sad about it because with the new season, he would spend all his time with Oli.
He was exited about it.
APRIL OF 2023
“Hey Oli. How are you?” It was strange for Oliver got a call from Ryan.
They spent all this time together on his house but now that Ryan got the divorce paper sings. He went back at his house. Oliver felt a little broken about it that his girlfriend joke how he lost his lover.
Sometimes Oliver hates this sentences. Not because he’s homophobic but because he doesn’t get why it bothers him so much that someone would see how much he cares about Ryan and interprete it as more than a feeling of friendship.
Sure, there was some times in which he desired to kiss him or he felt some kind of jealousy towards Ryan’s ex wife. But he always saw those moment as just his inner Buck who wants his Eddie.
But he knows these feelings will go away the moment he will kiss Ryan on screen and it would happen very soon as the call with Tim went.
Anyway, he was exited to get a call for Ryan since he wasn’t doing anything important.
“Hey Ry. I’m good and you?” He was smiling.
“Good. I just wanted to ask you if. If you want to go at Malibu beach tomorrow morning. If you free of course” Oliver sense that Ryan was nervous to ask. He does’t get why.
“Yeah, man. I’m free. What do you want to do?”
Just like that they both spent a good afternoon at the beach, with two seats to see the ocean.
Oliver needed to picture this moment as it was important for some kind of way.
It felt almost like a date but it couldn’t be.
Ryan followed him as he took a picture too.
Just when he went home, he found out Ryan posted that picture with the caption ‘New life’.
He doesn’t know why it warms his heart.
JANUARY OF 2024
Ryan was chilling down on his sofa. Adjusting on his new life as a single father and gay.
Well, in theory he is gay but he doesn’t want to pursue any sexual or intimate moment with a man right now.
After all his faded relationships and his ex marriage, he didn’t want to lose himself in hooking up with men.
What he wants is a relationship build by friendship and then see how that goes.
Sometimes he feels like he’s really demisexual as Eddie.
His thoughts were broke by his phone ring as Ryan discover his unrequited crush was calling him.
“Hey Oli, how are you?” He couldn’t help but be sweet in his tone for him.
“Hey Ry. Listen, are you busy this Saturday night?”
“No. The kids are with my ex wife that day. So, I don’t have anything to do. Why?”
Why Oliver wanted to know his plans for Saturday?
He made Ryan anxious.
“If you free then would you like to come with me and my friends at the Lakers match?”
Oh.
How wonderful.
“Yes, I would love to go with you.”
Fuck, he needs to move on from him asap.
He got it when he tried to date him that day at the Malibu beach.
He wanted to be brave enough to tell him.
So, he could be reject and make his feelings going away sooner than later.
He didn’t though as he subconsciously post that picture of their seats near the beach as a way to tell him that the only way he could finally start this new chapter of his life is with him.
In the end, he just drove him back at home with that feeling of maybe they will-won’t they.
Maybe this time at the Lakers game he will be more lucky but at what pro?
Oliver was enjoy this match so much.
Nothing is related to the fact that this time he was sitting near Ryan as that Lakers games of some years ago.
This time though he wasn’t feeling jealous of the girl next to him.
He was just happy and sometimes he was just staring at Ry to see his excitement over the team.
The only thing that maybe he should have done different was inviting his girlfriend with them but he didn’t feel the need. Also because she wasn’t invested so much at basketball.
Anyway, Oliver was happy to be just them.
As the match finished they really had a good time.
His female friends had to go as they had to get the train to come back home.
Instead, Oliver and Ryan were waiting for their Uber to come.
Oliver was checking his phone, checking were the Uber would pick them but also checking if his girlfriend text him something.
He didn’t get so surprised as he saw that there was nothing by her.
“Everythings good man?” Ryan asked him suddenly.
“Yeah. Just. Checking if my girlfriend sent me something but apparently no.” he said with an ironic tone.
“Ah. I know the feeling.” Oliver doesn’t get what Ryan meant by that.
“What do you mean?”
“I meant. I know how are you feeling right now. You wonder if they are missing you as much as you miss them. Feeling a little disappoint that they are not checking on you as you want. Honestly, it surprised me that you didn’t invited her since you basically live together as I recall.”
Maybe Oliver was dumber than he thought because what Ryan meant that he knows this feeling?
Who he was referring to?
As he remember, Ryan is gay and he didn’t love Christy so much to wonder these things.
Also, he didn’t want to date anyone right now.
So, who is this person that he’s making feel like this?
He didn’t got to ask the question as the Uber arrived and they had to take it.
Once they were almost at Ryan’s place though. He had to know.
So, as the Uber driver was at Ryan’s he didn’t want to come back home.
“You can leave us both here. Thank you.” He said as he paid him with his card and left the Uber.
Ryan looked at him confused. An understandable feeling if Oliver was in his place.
He needs to know who it is though.
“Oli, why did you…?”
“Can we go at your place, please? I will explain.”
Ryan just really look at his eyes for a moment and get that it was an important matter for him.
Sometimes he wonders if Eddie and Buck are like this because of his friendship with Ryan or they were always meant to get the other just with a stare.
“So, what do you want to know?” Ryan said once they were in his kitchen.
“Who were you talking about. When you said you know how I feel for my girlfriend. Who you were referring to?”
Ryan wanted to scream. He shouldn’t had say that but the words were escaping from his lips before him mind thought about them.
At this point, it doesn’t matter anymore.
“Do you want to know the truth or it’s better if I lie?” It wasn’t really a question but he still needs to taste the water.
Oliver looked at him for a moment, truly thinking about his answer.
Until he said what a part of Ryan wished him to answer.
“The truth.”
“Bueno. It was about a man who I can’t lose his friendship. But at the same time, I’m going crazy for how much I feel for him.” He still didn’t want to say it though.
“How crazy?” Oliver asked him.
Ryan did a sad smile.
“I think I can’t live my life without him. I can’t even picture a future where he’s not in it. That much crazy.” He wanted to cry.
“Do you think he feels the same way about you…?”
That was the millionaire question.
“I don’t know. He doesn’t even know my feelings for him. - He paused for a moment before saying the next sentence - Until now…”
They both stared at each other. Ryan looked how Oliver eyes become sad. In that look, Ryan knew his answer and it fucking breaks his heart.
“Ry…” Oliver whispered.
“Don’t. Don’t say it. I can’t bring myself to work with you if you said it.”
Ryan should knew back then with Tyler that everytime he express his feelings for a man. It always goes wrong like this.
“Let’s just. Let’s just pretend this conversation never happened. Okay? We had a good time at the basketball game. Why we should waste it by this stupid thing?” He couldn’t help himself as some tears came out from his eyes.
Oliver get a little angry about that sentence.
“It’s not stupid! Ry, your feelings for me are not stupid, do you understand?!”
Maybe Ryan did blackout a moment because he doesn’t know when Oliver came so close to him as he was touching his arms.
“You mean so much to me. So so much. Maybe I don’t feel crazy about you as much you are for me. But I know for sure if I lose you for this. I can’t come back to live my life the way I do.” Ryan smiled at that.
“And I’m not joking. My Lord, Ry. You should have see me when we were apart. I could’t understand why I felt like a part of my soul was ripped inside me. But I know why. You’re so special to me. You’re the Eddie of my Buck. I can’t-I can’t be without you, man…” he added.
Oh.
What.
“Oli…”
“Please, tell me that when we back at work nothing’s gonna change between us.”
Fuck.
Why he was so close to his put his forehead on his own.
Feelings the air shouting down by their breaths.
But anyway, how could he denied him that.
“I promise.” He whispered in Oliver lips.
“Good.” He replied.
Maybe they should break apart.
Maybe Oliver should let Ryan breath but they both don’t as there was as always something they need to do.
But they never did as now.
Because as back then when Ryan wanted to kiss him. It’s always a girlfriend or an ex wife to break their moment as the ring from Oliver’s phone suggested it.
He just hopes he doesn’t get jealous on set of the man Oliver has to kiss before him as he was jealous if his bestfriend girlfriend.
Anyway, they got a lot of interviews to do before getting to worry about it.
Notes:
I'm sorry people,
I swear the angst chapters are finished. The more I write about them the more I'm became insufferable.
Anyway, I hope you're enjoy it <3
Chapter 11: I kissed you as the lights went out but what does it mean for us?
Summary:
Oliver doesn't get why he can't stop to flirt with Ryan after he confessed his feelings for him. While Ryan would follow Kenny advise to flirt back at Oliver.
On top of it they had to shoot the bachelor party scene tonight, what could possible happen?
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
MARCH OF 2024
Since Ryan confessed his feelings for him, Oliver could’t help but flirt with him in all the interviews they had to do after the first episode of season 4 was aired.
It was just a some comments about how great Eddie is on television but he could’t help but being exited when Kenny said Ryan gonna be shirtless next episode on the Instagram stories they did while watching season 4.
Also, he kind of have a new obsession as to pictures everything Ryan does on set with his camera.
He always wanted to get pictures of Ryan. Especially when he was the new guy back then, but now he can do it and post some pictures of him on his instagram page with a new sense of meaning.
It’s just that Ryan is really pretty and a very handsome guy. He always knew about that since watching his abs and his perfect grin face shows. It’s not like Oliver never get why he was so popular with the Set Up movies and all.
Also, for what he read sometimes on Twitter with his burner account, he definitively feels who is a Eddie girl because Ryan is beautiful. Period.
He doesn’t get why he kind of feel lucky and good that Ryan’s in love with him and not some other guy who would just use him and his feelings to get something from him.
Oliver would never do that.
Especially after what they said about nothing changing between them.
But it’s not like he’s not enjoying how Ryan was obviously jealous about the new guy Buck has to kiss.
“Mmh, seems like you are in a good mood, Stark” Aisha said to him breaking his thoughts.
“Really? Maybe I had the right reason to be in a good mood.” he grin.
Aisha looked between him and Ryan, realizing something.
“Ah, and that’s because. it’s something related to our Mr. Guzman guy over there being jealous about you to get kissed by another man or something else?”
Damn it, she saw it.
“Look. Aisha. It’s not like that.”
“And how it is really? Because it’s from my wedding day that I feel something change between you two. But I can’t put my mind to guess what really happened. So, if you free tonight and want to talk with a friend - she indicated herself. Oliver smiled at her - just do a call.”
“I will think about it.”
Because reality is that Oliver doesn’t know what to say or do.
He’s just happy about Ryan and about Buddie but at the same time he should at least be happy about his relationship to not thinking about his bestfriend confessions every time he goes to bed with her.
He just hopes these sudden feelings will be more clear through the time.
APRIL OF 2024
Ryan doesn’t understand. He was here from five years and he never got the chance to kiss Buck.
This white guy dude come over just for this season and kiss his Buck in one scene just like that.
Sure, he agreed with Tim about it but one thing is to hear about Buck kissing a guy on the phone another thing is to see in his eyes right now.
He just hate this Lou Ferrigno guy too. His vibes are totally negative as he remind of his ex wife. So, maybe Tim should at least choose a right on heart guy to be the first man to kiss Oliv-Buck.
Because this is totally about Buddie and not of his feelings about his bestfriend, Oliver.
It doesn’t even matter what Kenny told him when they were at his place watching the first episode of season 4.
“If he’s flirting with you then flirt back. See where this land.” Kenny gave him a wink.
He did when the interviewer from the Bachelor Mansion asked him if they wanted to be in the show and he just keep on telling everyone to bring him flowers for Oliver.
He didn’t expect they would say the same thing at the same time and just smiling at each other.
“I’m happily taken” Oliver said and Ryan couldn’t help but burst in an evil and gay laugh in front of the camera. Like he knows something Oliver doesn’t.
Honestly, Ryan doesn’t get why Oliver was so flirty when he knows how he feels about him. Not that he’s complain but if he reject him that day at his house why he seems like he wants him in the way.
This is just complicated. And on the top of it. He has to shoot the bachelor party scenes with him tomorrow night in a nightclub, singing ‘What I like about you’ by The Romantics and being all touchy and drunk.
He wants to die.
THE NIGHT OF THE BACHELOR PARTY SCENE
Oliver didn’t like karaoke at all.
First he doesn’t know how to sing.
Second, it’s just a way to embarrassed yourself in front of your friends.
Anyway, it was for a good cause.
Also, Tim make him and Ryan drink a little to lose some booze and awkwardness. He can admit he feels a little bit better to shoot the karaoke scene and he hopes Buddie fans would be happy about it.
What makes him a little anxious is he has to touch Ryan all the time and sing in front of him.
He doesn’t understand why the thought make him feel so sick on his stomach.
While kissing a man for his time made him realize that lips are lips. It doesn’t matter for him.
Maybe this discover has open something inside of him that he never thought it was possible.
He always being straight for what he remembers but maybe it doesn’t matter because the moment he saw Ryan Guzman walk in on his show. He didn’t get a chance to still be straight.
He’s just so hot and pretty and he’s showing his fucking abs right now because the scene wants him to lose his shirt completely at the end of night.
Now they were just a drunk and in this hotel room, completely wasted with a bunch of extras pretending to dance and have fun with them.
But Oliver doesn’t care anymore.
He just wants to the cameraman to say cut and being joyful that Buddie is going canon.
When the cameraman did though, he didn’t want to go at home. He just to be here in this couch with Ryan. Holding his arm around him. Feeling his presence into his skin. His bones.
He just wants him.
“Okay guys, you can sleep here for tonight as we booked the room to shoot for tomorrow morning. The extras can go at home and thank you everybody for your hard work. We’ll see you tomorrow.” Tim said applauding the crew.
Everybody cheered and left the room. Expect him and Oliver who was told not to.
The last time they were alone this drunk it didn’t go well.
“Do you remember - Oliver started to talk while they were still on the couch - what you told me at that bar some years ago?”
What he was saying.
“You wanted to kiss me because you were bloody sure Buddie was goin to be canon” he added.
Oh, not that night.
“You mean when I made a fool of myself in front of my crush and I decide to speed my wedding up. So I could move on from my gay feelings for you.” Oliver raise his eyebrow.
“It’s that way you married your ex wife?” he asked.
“One of the motive. But because I could’t accept living again what I’ve been through with Tyler.”
Oliver seems almost offended by that.
“You know why I didn’t say anything at your request?” he added.
Filling the sudden silence of that hotel room.
“Tell me.”
“Because I couldn’t believe a beautiful man like you wanted to kiss me.”
Wait.
What.
“You think I’m beautiful?” Oliver nodded.
“The most beautiful man I ever saw.”
Oh.
Ryan could’t help but smile.
“You’re really hot too, man.”
Man?
Fuck the alcohol is not helping.
“I know. That’s why you want me.” he whispered in Ryan ears almost tempting him.
“Oli, please. Stop flirting.”
Because for how much Ryan wants to follow Kenny advice. He really can’t. His heart is begging him to stop this game between them right now.
“Why? You don’t-You don’t like me anymore?” his voice was almost broken.
“Oh Oli. I love you. I really. Really do.” an evil grin appear in his lips.
“Then what’s the problem?” he put his hand on Ryan leg.
Ryan felt all the sparks his body could make him feel.
“I just don’t get what do you want for me. I thought you reject me when we talked about it.”
“Please, kiss me.”
Just like that Oliver was stared at him with his pupils full dilated and asked him to do the only thing he can't do right now.
What about his girlfriend?
“What about your girlfriend? It would be fair to her to kiss me right now?” Ryan asked him and Oliver should thinking about that.
He should be the one not proposing this idea on Ryan but he can’t.
Tonight he’s just selfish.
“I don’t care.”
“What?”
“You heard me. I don’t care about her. I never did. Not as much as I care about you. Never as I care about you.” He move his hand on Ryan leg upper. To make him feel who he wants right now.
“Then why you’re still with her…” he asked looking at his lips.
“Because you assumed I don’t want you. An error that we have to deal with a kiss” he whispered on his bestfriend lips.
Almost tasting them.
“You kissed another man before me.” Oliver felt the jealous tone on Ryan voice.
He smiled.
“Yes, but that made me realize kissing women or men are the same thing.”
Ryan do a malicious going before saying on Oliver ear this words.
“That’s because he doesn’t know how to kiss you as I will.”
Good Lord.
“Do it then. Kiss me. On my lips.” he added.
He never beg someone so much to get a kiss. But that because he never desired to be kiss so much by a woman. Just for Ryan. His special friend.
As Ryan close the gap between them, Oliver could say that Lou was a terrible kisser. He never felt so much burn inside his body as he was feeling while kissing Ryan on this couch.
He couldn’t help but put a tongue and being follow by the same idea from Ry.
Jesus.
“Fuck.” he said.
“Better than Lou?” Ryan asked breaking the kiss.
“Better than anyone I ever kissed.”
Ry smiled as he came back on Oliver mouth devouring it.
Oliver was happy about it.
So happy that he needed to mark Ry with hickeys on his sexy body right now.
He started to kiss Ry neck but being suddenly stopped by his bestfriend.
“Oli. For how much I want to mark your body too. Tomorrow we had to film a scene. And I had to be half naked.”
How Ryan can be the reasonable one in this situation he can’t understand.
But he was right. People would be assumed. Especially Buddie fans would be assumed something happened last night. As it did happen something they will remember forever.
“It’s your body fault.” he blurt.
“Oh how come?” Ryan smiled.
“It’s your sexy abs with that sexy smile you have. Jesus Ryan, you want to murder me with your beauty.”
Ryan just burst in a genuine laugh. Oliver doesn’t get what it’s to laugh about.
But in that moment he knew. He just felt the happiest with his person. Because that’s what Ryan was always for him. His person. The one who always understand him and follow him whenever he goes.
From a vegan diet to his passion with photography.
He just knew in that moment that there were no one who could ever replace him in his life.
And if that’s not being in love with someone then he doesn’t know what love supped to be.
He just knows he feels in love with him though.
Notes:
THEY KISSED!!
Chapter 12: I can blow your mind but your heart is what I want the most
Summary:
The second part of what happened that night on the hotel room for the bachelor party scene and what Ryan and Oliver will do about their relationship
Notes:
Hy people,
I need to say that due to my college exam next week. I don't know if I will upload another chapter soon or not.
I hope you will enjoy it as there's some smut before the main event (pun intended).Anyway, I love your comments so much. Thank you <3
Chapter Text
THE MORNING AFTER THE BACHELOR PARTY SCENE
Oliver couldn’t believe what they done last night.
Sure, they had the hotel bedroom for tonight but they couldn’t sleep at all since they were occupied to discovered each other mouths.
Oliver could stop to touch Ryan as he kept on grab his upper leg until switch on his ass.
He didn’t know if Ry wanted to do something more then just kissing.
He didn’t want to cross a line if his Ry didn’t want to.
And for how much Ry was touching Oliver, he didn’t go through at more.
Sure, Oliver did get a boner but he didn’t want to pressure Ry.
He didn’t matter because they were both so close with their body that they rub each other dicks by just moving.
“Ry, can I touch you?” he whispered in his lips while keep kissing him.
“Yes” another kiss.
They both come naked in their stomachs without stopping to kiss and telling ‘I love you’ in repeat as a prayer.
He just felt a sense of calm and happiness the moment he opened his eyes and Ry was holding him while sleeping.
He couldn’t help but give him a kiss on his fluffy hair.
Everything felt perfect until he realize what he done.
He became what he hated the most: a cheater.
But did he really cheat on his girlfriend if him and Ry has always had those unresolved feelings and it was never the right time to act on them?
The one thing is sure that he will do after the take is to talk with his (ex) girlfriend and resolve everything.
Right now he just wants another five minuted with his Ry before coming back at shooting.
Ryan couldn’t keep himself together as in every interviews that did this day he just look at Oli with his heart eyes.
He can’t denying his feelings anymore.
He’s in love.
He just hopes that he and Oli will be okay this time.
Even though they didn’t still talk about the other elephant in the room: Oli’s girlfriend.
But Ryan is sure they will resolve everything in the end.
MAY OF 2024
Since that beautiful night at the hotel room, Ryan couldn’t believe Oliver left his ex girlfriend to be with him.
It all feels like a dream.
Some years ago he felt trapped in a life that it wasn’t is own. Now he just grateful for the job he has, his kids and his new boyfriend.
Well, more like partner. They didn’t name what they were but in some ways they knew that they are together.
If you asked how Ryan knows Oli is in love with him, it’s because every time Ryan said something Oliver just laugh with all his body reacting.
It’s because he never see Oliver so much involve to take pictures of him as he do now. It’s true that he does for all his cast members but he knows he has special spot in Oliver art.
He never felt so happy and and in love as he was for him.
However, there’s was a problem that he wanted to talk about it the morning after the bachelor party.
A problem that they still haven’t resolve because Ryan did felt it was the right time.
Well, also because even if he invites Oliver at his new home and they just lain on his bed watching Buddie edit and reading Buddie fan fictions, sharing them with the other.
They cuddle all the time and sleep together.
Also, they give each other some handjobs when they can’t hiding anymore their attraction.
But the problem is one Ryan knows and he does want to resolve: having sex.
Because having sex with women was fine.
Sure Ryan loved having sex with them.
Even though it was just a perform. He still wanted to make them come and feel special in bed.
But with men? He never discover this part of himself.
Sure, sometimes he jerk off about some guys dick pictures when he was on Grindr.
Just because he needed something to escape from his reality but in the end he would be not true that he always imagined Oliver touching him in those times.
Now that he have him, his mind can’t even think about other guys and how they can blow his mind.
It’s just that he’s scared but he’s sure that if he just talks about it with Oli everything will be fine.
That’s why they worked so good together.
Once they were on his trailer to rehearse some lines, he decided to do it.
“Hey Oli, can we talk?”
“Sure my love. Tell me”
Ah he loves it when Oli called him his lover.
“Listen, I need to tell you that. I love being your boyfriend” Oli smiled while Ryan took his hands.
“I love it too.” Oli added.
“Yes. And I know we didn’t do anything more than touch each others dicks.”
“Ry, you know I don’t want to do anything that you’re not comfortable to do. If you’re worried about that-”
“No, I know. It’s just. I want to do it. I want to have sex with you. The problem is that this is new for me.”
“It’s new even for me. I mean, I never been with a man before you.”
“See, that’s why talking with you is always easy.” They both smiled.
“So, what do you wanted to say?” he added.
“Just if you can wait a bit before I want to eat your body for good.” he grin.
Oliver burst into a laugh but Ryan know it’s not mean.
“Well, if that’s the reward for waiting. I will.” he was serious this time.
See, it’s just easy being with him.
Chapter 13: I only put on this dress so you could take it off
Summary:
Oliver went to Ryan place to get him before the Family Feud game start but he finds Ryan still not ready and in anxious.
How they will realese this stress?
Chapter Text
THE DAY OF THE FAMILY FEUD GAME
Maybe it was the end of the last season that made Ryan a little sad about him. Sure, not be able to see Gavin like before was not a good thing for him. He knows he will return in the next season but still he doesn’t know when it will be.
Of course Tim told him about anything and how he’s planning on making Buddie canon and Christopher come back home. Still he kinda feels like there’s something missing.
Anyway it doesn’t matter. Not right now. Right now what it matters is the fact that him, Oli, Aisha, Tracie and Brandon was inviting by the Family Feud game to participate.
A game Ryan maybe is a little stress about because he wanted to win.
A common feeling he shares with his boyfriend.
But he’s stressing out so much he does’t know what to do.
THE AFTERNOON BEFORE THE GAME
Oliver was so many evil things as the more he lived in this life the more he sees how fans can be.
Especially for a gay ship that it just help to open Buddie field and made them endgame.
Sure, he did block all the Tevan fans but still.
Scrolling on Twitter and reading the things he read about it, it really shows him how much of this fandom was biphobic and racist.
Sure maybe he’s learning that the reason why he wants to make sure in every interview that Buck is a bisexual character. It’s because in primis he loves Buck but also because maybe it’s his sexuality as well.
He have a boyfriend after all. A really pretty boyfriend who wants to hold and kiss and be all over him when he can.
He never believed himself in this. Sometimes he wonders if it’s really a phase and he’s attracted to Ryan just because he’s pretty but then he made himself unlock all his past thoughts about some boys he found them pretty and maybe ha had some gays thoughts in high school.
No man though compares to Ryan.
He just feels like their soulmates in a way.
Anyway, he driving to Ryan’s place to pick him up before going to the game.
A really great opportunity to show at the world that he is a great leader and he will take his team to the win.
His phone ring broke his thoughts as he was about to arrive to Ryan’s.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Oliver. Where are you?” It was Tracie at the phone with Aisha voice on the back.
“Hey Trace. Darling. I’m about to get Ryan and then we will be at the place on time.”
“Good, Stark. Take some alcohol with you we’re stressing out here!” It was Aisha this time.
Oliver laugh as he was about to replied but he was interrupted by Brian’s voice.
“Oliver please! Take some tequila with you!”
“I will bring something. Don’t worry about it. But in the meantime, why don’t you guys focus on the questions we could get this night?”
“Always so mean to us.” It was Brian joking.
He wasn’t mean. He just want his team to be ready and focus. That’s too much to ask?
“I’m gonna go, mates. I’m at Ryan’s. See you soon.” he tried to get avoid but that sentence.
“See you soon!” they all said before Oliver ended the call.
As Ryan saw it was Oliver arrived, his anxious just got the best of him.
If his boyfriend was here than that’s means that the show will start in some hours.
He was still in his pajamas though as he didn’t want to go.
But then Oliver rang on his door and just like this, his boyfriend watched him procrastinate this thing.
“Ry. Do you know that we should be at the place in 20 minutes?” Oliver said while waiting on Ryan bed for him to get ready.
“I know! I know. I’m sorry but I was so scared for all the game thing that my body didn’t want to move to change dress.” he was changing in his bedroom.
“Ry, calm down. It’s just a game.” he got up from the bed and walking near the bath’s door to open it.
“I know Oli. But it doesn’t mean it’s not scary.”
“It is. But look, Ry. Don’t you think I want my team to get ready for the match and win? You know I’m a little competitive about this things.”
“Erase the ‘little’ part.” Oliver could sense Ry was smiling.
“Ok. Yes, I’m competitive. So, I want to win and we will. I have faith on my teammates.”
Ryan came out from the bathroom with the most beautiful look ever.
Well, for Oliver everything Ryan puts on makes his boyfriend beautiful.
“So, how do I look?” Ry asked.
Oliver wanted really to be cautious about his answer but he can’t hold it anymore.
“You look like I want to take your pants off and eat you out in front of everyone.” He whispered on Ry ear.
Ry cheeks went red in no time.
“You’re sexy too. I mean.” Ry tried to said.
Lord, did Oliver manage to make Ryan flustered?
“Do you want to do something about it. Right now. Or. Later?” He has to let him know his game here though.
Ryan really looked at him for one moment and everything just blur as his boyfriend lips were on his own.
Devouring him as he never did before.
With a new kind of wanting that Oliver is a little scare of.
Lord, he didn’t know he could get anxious too for this day.
SOME HOURS BEFORE THE GAME
Ryan would say he got crazy tonight but he can’t help it.
He waited and waited to feel like he want to explore his boyfriend body fully.
He desire him so much.
It’s not that he didn’t find Oliver attractive. On the contrary. He really really want to do more than just handjobs and making out.
But everytime a voice in his head told him he’s not ready.
Until now.
Maybe it’s because they both had to get in time for the game and the anxious get the best of him.
Maybe he needs something to relax a bit.
Or maybe it’s just happened that he wants Oliver inside of him right now so he could feel him in his ass when they will play.
So, they were on his couch. Ryan took all his cloths off first then Oliver followed him.
He told him to sit and so Oliver did.
Ryan got on his knees as he went to lick little by little his boyfriend dick.
Making Oli shiver for pleasure.
He kept on going until Oliver was so wet enough.
“Babe, can you get up, please” he said as he watched Oli getting up on his couch fully naked body.
“Of course, sweetheart.”
Then he lain on his couch with his ass open in plain sight.
“Please. Oli. Get inside of me.”
He didn’t know how he could something so dirty like this but here he goes.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. I’m sure. I want to feel you. I want to be one with you.”
Ry was always a bit romantic, wasn’t him?
But as he asked so nicely, Oliver couldn’t back down.
“Do you have some lube?”
“No. But I don’t care. I want to feel you inside my ass while we’re in tv.”
Oh Lord, this is was worth the waiting.
As he used his saliva to get into his boyfriend hole first with his fingers.
At some point he could actually feel how Ry wanted his dick so bed that he was getting wet for it.
“Oli. Please. Get inside.”
And for all what matter, how could Oliver survive this?
He enter first gently not to hurting him.
“Damn, you’re so tight. Love.”
He felt like his ass was eating his dick entirely.
Once he was fully in. He waited a bit before push.
“Oli. C’mon, I can take you.”
Okay, he needs to fuck his boyfriend right now so he could stop asking him things that are murder him.
“Fuck. Yeah. Oli. There…”
Fuck, how could he not be doing that with Oli from the start?
“You liked that, love? You love how my cock can fill your ass?”
“Yes. Yes! Please, give me more. Don’t stop! God!”
Just like that he came so hard without touching his dick once.
He never had an orgasm so high to bring him in this state.
Fuck.
“I love you.” he said kissing Oliver after the best sex of his life.
“I love you too.” He replied while keep on kissing him.
As both of them would be happy to spend all the day cuddling on Ryan couch.
An alarm from Oliver phone bring them to reality as they had to be on the set of Family Feud in 5 minutes now if they won’t lose the game for forfeit.
“Shit.”
They both said as in the speediest way possible got dress and run in Oliver car.
They got lucky the presenter was getting late as them.
Notes:
If you think Oliver didn’t come, he will 👀👀👀
Chapter 14: I love you but i need your body on me right now.
Summary:
After the Family Feud game, Oliver couldn't help it anymore and goes to the bathroom of the set to do a quick jerk off.
For his lucky, his boyfriend find him and help him with it.
Notes:
Hy people,
I want to say I wrote this while I'm stressing out for my exam day.Anyway, enjoy it <3
Thank you for all the comments I appreciate them <3 <3
I wiil try to update more often after the exam <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
ONE HOUR BEFORE THE GAME
Ryan couldn’t believe what him and Oli done before getting here but his ass definitely knows.
As he couldn’t sit down properly while eating a whole cake before going on live.
He doesn’t even help the fact that he can’t stop look at his boyfriend remembering how good his dick made him feel.
And maybe when Oli post a video on his Instagram page before the game started, while Ryan was looking at him, biting his tongue out of the world. He wasn’t thinking how he could bent Oli over a wall and sucking his cock again.
Wait, rethinking about it.
Did his boyfriend came at all after he finished?
AFTER THE GAME
Oliver couldn’t believe what they just manage to did before.
Lucky for them, he was their captain. That’s why they win.
That wasn’t his problem right now anyway. The problem was that when him and Ry arrived here, he didn’t come at all.
Not because he didn’t find Ry attractive. Hell, he’s has the hottest boyfriend ever.
But because they had to hurry up and he got anxious to be on time.
And in someways his dick was getting soft time by time.
What it did make it up again was the way Ry was reacting around him once they started the Family Feud game.
Okay, maybe it’s not like Ry was the only one rethinking about what they done on his boyfriend couch but still.
The way Ry was looking at him while thinking about the answer. The ‘Jack Rabbit’ when he thought about a gift for his boyfriend to give. The way he touched him anytime he said anything with his finger.
Most of all, the ‘Come on, Oli’ when he had to give the last answer to win.
Winning the game was awesome. He didn’t expect at all the giant hug from Brian but what he didn’t expect at all was Ry jumping on the two of them and feeling his chest on his head.
Making him feel the scent he had before while they were doing it.
Honestly, Oliver doesn’t know how he didn't pull to get a boner right there but he knew pretty damn sure, he has one right now.
That’s why he went on the bathroom of the Family Feud stage. To trying to release some of the huge pain he was feeling.
However, he should expect the fact that his boyfriend came in the same bathroom while he was stroking his dick out there.
“Oli, are you there?”
Oh Lord.
“Yes. Yes, Ry. I’m here.” he tried to mask his moans as Ry open the door where he was.
He looked at him questionably until he licked his lips with the same hungry eyes of before.
Oli just make Ry close the bathroom door and kiss the hell out of his boyfriend.
“It’s your fault.” His boyfriend said while Ry was just thinking of a good way to make him come.
“How come?” He whispered on Oli ear.
“You. And your fucking love for me will be the death of me.”
Fuck, Ry really want to ruin him right now.
He never did something like this in a public place.
Well, obviously because he never find a woman so attractive as Oli is for him.
Also, once they had sex is like his body lock something inside him that he never believed he has.
As he got on his knees in a probably dirty floor and proceed to devoured his delicious and sweet boyfriend cock.
The moans escaping from his boyfriend just said to him how much good he was.
“Ry. Love, I’m going to cum.”
Yep, that was actually the intention here as he kept blow him with one hand on Oli dick and the other jerking himself off for the pleasure.
“Ry!” He did come inside his mouth as Ryan came a moment after on his hand.
Fuck, it was the second best orgasm he ever had with him.
As they were about to kiss after the splendid quick blowjob. They both looked at each other with terror as they both hear a voice they didn’t want to hear at all.
“Ryan. Oliver. It’s that you two in the bathroom?”
It was Brian.
Oh Lord, what they’re going to do.
Notes:
Brian knows lol
Chapter 15: I told you to stay but you didn't heard me well.
Summary:
After Brian cought them in the bathroom. Ryan and Oliver decide to take a break before coming back at shooting season 8 in August to think what they want in their relantionship.
They will break up or stay together forever this time?
Notes:
WARNING: outing; sexual oriention crisis
Chapter Text
JULY OF 2024
After that little incident in the bathroom, Oliver and Ryan talked about what they meant for their relationship.
It’s not their fault if Brian caught them in the heat of the moment. That was what Ryan was keep on repeating on his mind.
But what he shouldn’t be happening was Brian saying something to Aisha and Tracie once he came out of that bathroom.
Ryan was really scared about it. It’s not that he wasn’t ready to come out but one thing it’s just saying your sexuality to your friends another one is to tell about him and Oli.
At least what last about him and Oli as they were both clear about to not talking with each other after that incident. Especially Oli.
Anyway, he had to focused on getting in shape at gym for season 8 as Tim asked him.
Also, he finally could hang out with his friends after all the custody battle. He should really focused on this and not the fact that he will miss Oli while he’s in Texas.
But he can’t do anything about it.
Especially after what they said about figuring out what they want from their relationship.
TEXAS (JULY OF 2024)
Oliver is sad. He’s in Texas with a couple of his friends and his dogs. Gettin new tattoos.
Especially a new one referred to his dogs named ‘My companion’.
Even though when he read it something inside him shifted as maybe he did get it meant for someone else.
He shouldn’t be feeling sad. He’s in this new place, sitting on a comfort chair, drinking some beer, enjoy new company.
And yet.
He can’t stop to think about what he said to his (maybe still) boyfriend that night after the game.
He should feel really stupid.
It’s not like it was Ry fault Brian caught them.
It’s Brian fault too that he said something to Aisha, who she didn’t stop to call and text him to know what was going on between them too.
He wanted to say to her the truth. Even if he was still a little scared about coming out about his sexuality and his relationship with Ry.
Still, he didn’t know why some part of him lied anyway and made him feel so miserable now that he’s away from his man.
Maybe everything will be fine once they come back at shooting this august.
Even though, Oliver agreed at Ryan to see what they really want from this relationship.
Making them going on a break that it’s breaking his heart in million pieces without be able to talk to him and kiss him and hold him as he always wanted to do from the moment they got together.
Oh Lord what he had done.
THE NIGHT AFTER THE GAME
After Brian caught them doing something in the bathroom. Ryan was waiting for his Uber to come and get him faster than anything.
Sure, first Aisha told him to call him and if he wants to get some whine together at her house.
Still, he doesn’t know if he can tell something for Oli sake.
“Can you explain to me why you didn’t say anything?” It was Oliver as he didn’t want to go without him.
“What should I’d say? Oh, yes. I’m gay and I’m in a relationship with my coworker Oli. Here. Who I couldn’t take my hands off him. Looking how gorgeous he is.” The replied made Oli blush a little but he was still angry with him for some reasons.
“No. But you could still stop Brian to tell about us at Aisha and Tracie. And who knows who now.”
“Oli. Mi amor. It’s not like I can control what other people can or can’t do. I’m sorry Brian had like outing us. But it’s so bad that our friends knows now? I mean, they always sensed something happen between us. Especially Aisha. What matters who knows?”
“I care!” It was the first time after they’re big fight that Oliver raise his voice against Ryan.
“Maybe you’re ready to tell all the world about us but I’m not! I’m scared. I’m scared people will know and we will never be free of their judging and questionings about our sexualities and who knows what!”
Oh.
Ryan kind of forget about that.
“And you should know about it! You lived in this show biz life more than me and still you don’t care!” He added.
It’s true. In some ways, it’s true he should have know better.
It’s true that even now, Oli was having a sexuality break down as he did when he had to come to term about him being gay.
He understands him.
But still. Why he doesn’t want at least just his friends to know.
And why that’s breaking his heart?
“I know. God, if I know what’s like to live in a show biz life. But still, what I get from that fake world is to live my life as I want. With the people that I love the most. I love you, Oli. I always will till the end of my life. But I can’t keep hiding myself to my friends and our relationship if that’s what you want.”
“Are you…Are you breaking up with me…” he sensed the tears coming down from his eyes.
What he’s going to say?
“No. I’m not. But I want to know if you ready to tell about us at our friends. Just them. If not, maybe we should take a break until we come back at shooting and figuring out what we want.”
Oh.
“Ry. I love you too. So much. But I’m scared. I’m still scared about who I am and I don’t know if I want my friends to know something I’m not even so sure about me.”
Why he has always to say the wrong thing to him?
Now, Ry was on the verge of crying as him.
“That’s why. Maybe be apart this summer would be good for us. To get things straight…” Ryan said.
“Yes. Maybe, you’re right. Maybe we should be apart. No talking to each other until. We know for sure what we want. What I want…”
I’m sorry, he wanted to add but his eyes were just talking for him.
A tear from Ryan’s eye came down in the end.
Oliver knew he broke his heart. Right there in that moment.
He doesn’t know how he will survive this summer without him…
Maybe even Ryan doesn’t know though.
END OF JULY 2024
In the end, Ryan accepted Aisha invite at some bar to talk.
Maybe at the four beer, he give up and told her about everything.
Maybe because some part of him, he’s scared that after this break Oli would decide to break up from him.
Because he’s not worthy of him anyway.
“OH MY GOD! Finally! I knew you liked him but damn. I would never guess you’re actually in love with him”
“I love him so much, Aisha. You don’t know how hard it is to not be able to reach him these past few months.” He was sad and tipsy at this point.
“Oh my poor Ryan. If I find that son of a bitch I will make some sense into him.”
Ryan was happy though he was finally having some good time with Aisha after all.
“I’m really happy we’re friends again. But no. Don’t do anything. It was his idea to think what he wants from me. So, I will wait until he decide to broke up with me…”
Okay maybe a little bit of depression hit him too.
“Ry, i don’t think Oliver would ever break up with you. Why you think that?” She was making sense but for Ryan drunk brain she was trying to reassure him for the inevitable.
“Because, he wasn’t even queer until he met me. Maybe I’m just some sort of pass for straights guys and that’s all. Or maybe when he said he loves me. It’s in a platonic way…”
“Was he faking it when you slept together that day?”
Ryan almost spit his beer.
“I mean, was he faking it having a boner and a mother one later for you?”
Ryan doesn’t know if she was serious or she was trying to make him laugh but if it was the second, she wasn’t succeeded.
Because if Ryan thinks about it the answer is only no.
Oliver was enjoying as much Ryan did.
Oliver was hard as much Ryan was.
Oliver made him feel sexy and important as much as Ryan tried to do for him.
So, maybe he wasn’t faking it but this doesn’t answer to his other question:
He will broke up with him once they will back at shooting or something else?
END OF JULY 2024 (RYAN PLACE)
Maybe Oliver got insane from his trip. Maybe he didn’t want to wait until august.
That’s why he was at Ryan’s not knowing what to do.
He parked near the house and he still can’t came out of his car.
Maybe it was true he was scared about all of this and the meaning of them.
But he can’t stay without him longer than a day.
He hurted him so much looking at his Insta page, hoping he will post something or to look at the pictures he did of them while they were on the park with his dogs or at the beach, with Mateo and Genevieve with their hands.
Or the last time before drifting apart when they went on that trip near the hills. Teaching at Ryan how to get good pictures from high places.
Lord, he miss his boyfriend. His partner and soon tv husband.
It doesn’t matter if they’re friends knows. Hell, he doesn’t care anymore as when he was at Texas he came out as bisexual to some of his friends and he felt really good about himself.
He wants to add his other equation though.
His other half.
He needs to make up with Ry.
That’s why he came out from the car and rang the bell.
For his surprise, there was a mustache Ryan looking at him with all his beauty and sexiness.
Lord how could he survived this summer without him.
“Oli, what are you…” Ry was asking but he was interrupting by Oliver lips on his own.
“I don’t care who knows. Please. Let’s stay together.” He whispered on Ry lips.
Ry smiled of joy to heard that.
“Don’t go away from me anymore.” Ry add.
Oliver nodded as he kept on kissing his (now more than ever) boyfriend.
They will never broke up again.
Chapter 16: We get it. He's your muse and you can't help it.
Summary:
Now that Oliver and Ryan are enstablish at his friends. They never felt so crazy about someone else as them. Especially now that they came back at shooting with Ryan getting a mustache for Eddie.
Some time pass and a fan of Oliver post a comment about Ryan being Oliver's muse. Oliver tried to correct them but in some ways he knows that they were telling the truth. He just hopes someday he will finally make Ryan meet his parents one day.
Notes:
Hy people I'm back <3
I finally pass my exam and as i promised i will try to update more often.
I'm afraid there will be two or three chapters before the end as i feel this story is coming to a closure (Even though I'm never so sure about it).
Anyway, I'm glad you're enjoy this fic so much <3<3
Thank you for all your lovely comments <3
Chapter Text
AUGUST OF 2024
Coming back at shooting season 8 was the best thing that ever happened to him and Oli.
Finally, Buck will break up with his boyfriend and Buddie will be canon in the next episodes as Tim told them about.
Also, what Tim was excited about, it was Eddie getting a mustache this season and how this will affect his emotions.
Ryan was so excited this season to finally play Eddie as a canon gay character but also he can’t help it but notice how his boyfriend too love his new mustache.
Especially in bed.
When Oli came at his home after being apart for some months, he didn’t expect him to tell him he wants them to be together for real this time.
Oli is always a good surprise for him.
As he can’t stop think about what they did in his bed that day.
The image of Oli riding his dick was imprinted in his mind forever.
Moaning and screaming his name every time Ryan was thrust his hips rougher inside of him.
Marking his man with bites and hickeys.
He doesn’t know how some days later Oli decide to challenge him with that Instagram story of his mustache being half naked.
Ryan was sure he did it on purpose to make him going insane with his boyfriend body.
He didn’t have to beg so much to fuck him again on the window of his garden.
Oliver is so excited to start season 8 that he bring his camera to make pictures of his bestfriends on set.
Especially of Ry.
He decided to post them on his Instagram page episode by episode and it was kind of fun that everyone was on board with him.
On the other hand, Ry with his beautiful mustache was just pretty enough to be his model.
He kind of like this summer with them and dancing at the ‘Brat’ album with Aisha making him and Ry be together.
Sometimes, Oliver could say Kenny was a little suspicious about this. That’s why him and Ry decided to talk to him about them after the dance video they made.
He was so happy about them.
Oliver was happy to be accepted by them and his relationship.
Really happy.
Just, for some reasons he can called them jealousy, he doesn’t like Kenny to like so much his boyfriend mustache.
Sure, they made video together to make fun sees how they were coping with mustache Eddie.
But since Ry told him, the mustache was a Tim and Kenny idea too, he can’t help it but feeling a little taken back.
Of course, it’s irrational. Obviously Ry and Kenny became really good and close friends on set and obviously since Kenny has more experience in this world. He’s the one that Tim listen to make some small decisions for their characters.
What it wasn’t normal is the fact that Tim listen just to Kenny and Ryan. But Oliver understood as everyone here that Ry was Tim’s favorite.
Also, not so normal about this but anyway.
Oliver just wanted to be at his home with his dogs after spending his time with that ugly face of Lou as Buck is still with him.
The only lucky thing was that their break up episode will come sooner than later. That’s a thing he was sure Tim listened to him to do.
SEPTEMBER OF 2024
Maybe Oliver didn’t want to sound so mean at his fan on Instagram.
Maybe he didn’t want to be this evil guy his fans always knows he is.
He can’t help it though as it’s not like he’s been rude or anything. It’s just the way he was raised.
That’s why when that fan wrote that comment about Ry being his muse on his Instagram account. He thought for a moment they’re attacking his man on social media.
Of course when he realize that they weren’t say it to attack Ry but to state a fact: Ryan is your muse.
Oliver would be a hypocrite if he admit that it’s not true because Ry is.
Or better, he’s become his muse since the first day that he met him on set.
He never stopped to get pictures of him with the cast members or just the two of them.
Now, with all these pictures black and white with his beautiful mustache man portraits by him. He just in some ways showing at his fans he’s in love with this man.
Sure, him and Ry wasn’t ready to tell at the all whole world yet.
But Oliver would be insane not to think that one day he will make Ry meet his family in London or Ry will do the same with his family at Texas.
So maybe they’re just in that phase that all their friends knows and they’re good with it.
Someway, he can’t stop to think of a way to soft launch his relationship on media.
He just hopes Ry will be okay with it at all.
One thing Ryan was sure about it’s his way to make his boyfriend focused on him. Getting his attention all the time. Sometimes in a subtle way other times in more no so subtle ways.
Maybe he was crazy because all the cast was online to be in this interview and the only thing he can think about is to mirror Oli so he could notice him.
Of course his boyfriend notice him and mirror him too.
He felt like the two of them were in this love bubble while the others were keep on talking.
In someways, him and Oliver are always in the honeymoon phase. Especially for all the ups and down they’re been through on their relationship.
In the end, when they finally are together is like they’re soulmates. It’s like Ry find the half of his soul. The other half of his coin. His partner for life.
He can’t help it but feeling his cheeks becoming so red when Oli looked at him.
He feels like some cartoon character of Japan when the girl blush for his boy.
He’s in love.
He’s madly in love with Oliver and he wants him to meet his parents.
He just knows he’s the one for him.
And maybe one day they will find a way to tell at the whole world.
But right now, he’s just enjoying being with him every step of the way.
And that’s enough this time.
Chapter 17: It's my birthday. Let's celebrate
Summary:
Ryan birthday finally arrived. What his boyfriend will do?
Notes:
I'm sorry that it's short but i want to write some fluffy chapters because they deserved it <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
SEPTEMBER OF 2024
Ryan never thought he was so lucky to get back his friends again.
Especially, now that he was just enjoy a dinner with them and be the happiest man on earth as he did made them laugh so much.
They always wonder why he cut them out so suddenly without an explanation while other who had one, it didn’t felt right anyway. In his own way, day by day, Ryan cut all the friends he made through his life in Sacramento and in LA.
Chasing a dream and a girl who never give him the choice to be free and be himself inside and out.
Sure, being an actor never cost him his sanity. As he was before an MMA fighter and in his free time a painter.
But he always loved be with them.
A ring of his phone broke his stream of thoughts as he was smiling about something one of his friends said.
It was a call from Aisha.
“Hy Aisha, how are you?” He kept smiling.
Aisha is one of his favorites person in the world. Loosing her was as much painful as it was loosing Oli with the only exception that Oli is his lover.
“Good, Ry. I wanted to asked you something if you’re not busy?”
“I’m just with a couple of friends. Speaking of. Say ‘Hi’ to Aisha” he put his phone on speaker as everyone cheer and said hi to her friend.
“Well, then I’ll be short. I was wondering if for your birthday. You want to go at Disneyland with me?”
Oh.
Ryan heart was really happy to hear it.
“Of course. Send me the date and we will go.” He was excited.
“Cool. Then I’ll leave you at your friends.” She was excited too by her voice.
“Goodnight, Aisha.”
“Goodnight.”
It was really a beautiful night in the end.
RYAN BIRTHDAY DAY
As Ry now got the best. Boyfriend in the world. It was obvious of Oliver make him a special birthday post with a new picture of him in black and white as the mustache he’s have got him hotter than before.
Oli couldn’t help but feel this warm and special feeling about him which he recognize as being simply in love with someone.
The new thing about it, it’s the fact that he never felt these emotions before from anyone and he did love some couple of girls back in high school and especially with Hannah for the all trouble he did to come and live in a new country for her but still it wasn’t enough.
He wasn’t enough. For her at least.
For his Ry. He will make sure to be perfect and the one.
It will start with the Instagram post and than with the 911 cast video but especially for a little trip he got in mind on his bed in his room.
It wasn’t something sexual per say but he did want him to make him feel special and a nice dinner at his house after all the hard work they did into shooting scenes and being on interviews. It’s a nice way to show that you care.
Maybe if that leads to sex. It’s just a bonus.
Sometimes Oliver thinks how before all of this, he never felt or acknowledged gay thoughts about men. To be properly though, bisexual thoughts about men.
Sure, maybe he was attracted to some rugby players back when he was 17.
Nothing so much to think about because he was sure he never thought about having sex with a man. With women there were plenty of thoughts about it.
Maybe he experiences getting crushes or just flings without thinking about it too much but then when he met Ry it was inevitable not to think about how attractive he is.
The first time he get to be inside him and him be inside him. It was like something unlocked deep in his body. A sensation he never felt so vivid before. Maybe he repressed that part of himself so hard that he never got the time to have thoughts about it.
However, with Ry, it’s like a constant thought mixed with love and affection. He wants to give him the world for sure.
Starting with the flowers and the dinner he made.
Maybe it’s true that he and Buck share something and maybe that something it’s just his cooking skills (Or even his sexuality now that he thinks about). But he was sure as the bloody hell he would made Ry happy tonight despite what would happen after.
He just wants his attention and companionship. That’s all.
Ryan couldn’t believe his boyfriend cooked for him and made a nice romantic place for his birthday. He got so lucky to have him.
“Ah, I almost forgot.” Oli said and proceeded to take out his oven a good looking full of chocolate cake with a note on itself.
Sayin ‘Happy birthday my love’
Ryan was going to cry as he didn’t let Oli put the cake on the table that he kiss the hell out of him.
“Ry…” he whispered.
“I love you. I love you. I love you”
And he would never get tired of saying it.
As they proceed to get on bed after the amazing dinner he put for his boyfriend. They end up checking some Twitters opinions about Buddie as they couldn’t believe they will be canon sooner than later.
More than sex, Oliver love to see his boy getting all excited about something they have in common.
They’re fangirly about their characters of course.
When he was keep on scrolling to show Ry an edit he never believed what he find out in the end.
A video of him back at some years ago when it was Ry’s birthday as well.
A specific video of him when Ry was still with that evil girl and he misread his name completely out of jealousy.
Without knowing, Ry saw what he was looking all shocked and as he heard what Oliver said. He did a malicious grin and proceed to make him see a pictures when Oliver sent to that evil creature on Instagram to not be jealous about Eddie being with Buck.
As Oliver did try to threat her not just about Buddie but also about loosing Ry as well.
“You know. I think they’re right. - Ry started to say - On Twitter. I think it’s true that you stole me from that woman.”
Oh.
In someways, subconsciously, Oliver always knew that the one he really wanted was Ryan.
He couldn’t help but smile at the new information as he proceed to kiss Ry with passion.
They never break body contact as tomorrow morning arrived.
Notes:
Aisha and Ryan friendhsip my beloved <3<3
Chapter 18: Do you picture me like I picture you?
Summary:
Oliver felt a little jealous about the Batman stripper for his man. Also, bored because he has to shoot soon for the Halloween episode and still be with that ugly face of Buck boyfriend.
Ryan got fun at Disneyland with Aisha and once he's back he get an idea to make the all world know he and Oliver are together. He just hopes his boyfriend agreed with him this time.
Notes:
Not me posting about them after I watched Oliver give Ryan the Zendaya laugh with his hand on his zip pants while they were shooting the BUDDIE HUG GOODBYE IN THE RAIN AHHH
Anyway, I hope you're enjoying it until now <3 <3
(P.S: Don't worry it's not finished yet. I can't help to get to the end of this but probably it will happen soon)
Chapter Text
END OF SEPTEMBER OF 2024
Being in love with Ry comes in times where or he’s thirsty about his boyfriend pictures and make him have new ideas to have sex with him in new places. Or he became jealous of his friends which made come a Batman stripper for Ry birthday at his boyfriend place.
Lucky for them, Ry pushed that stripper away. Even though he wasn’t a stripper but one of Ry friends.
Sure, he shouldn’t feel jealous about them. Also, Ry is pretty crazy in love with him as Oliver is for him.
Anyway, it shouldn’t matter but he couldn’t help to feel possessive about him.
Maybe before his feelings were hiding for his internalize homophobia and denying of his love feelings for Ry.
Maybe today was just a bad day and it didn’t help at all that they’re were about to shoot the halloween episode and he has to kiss that ugly man again on set.
Sometimes he wonders why Tim is not making them break up sooner on the show. Even though the first scene he shoot with that man is their break up scene with the dinner at all.
He did even find kind of ironic that Tommy gift Buck two tickets for the Lakers Game when Oliver and Ry did it the first time they were just friends.
Sometimes it’s like Tim knows something about them but maybe it was just a strange feeling for Oliver.
Anyway, now he’s bored because Ry is with Aisha at Disneyland as a birthday trip while he’s at home doing nothing. Thinking how dumb he was to never thinking about it before.
Maybe next year he will.
Ry did enjoy his trip with Aisha. It was about damn time they spend sometime together.
He did end up every night to call Oli when they came back at the hotel but since Aisha knows now they can get all lovey dovey with each other as usual.
She even said and quoted ‘Buck and Eddie are together in every universe’.
That’s so true.
The only thing left is, he wanted to kind of soft launch them for the world.
At least, doing something not so subtle but subtle too to make sure people knows Oli is his man.
When they came to shoot the Halloween episode. Putting all the mask on and see how Oli never stopped to get a picture about him.
He warm his heart so much to be the source of his inspiration but also he came up with an idea.
“Hey, mi amor. Can i see the pictures you make today?” He asked him once they came back at home. Ryan’s place.
He didn’t even have to ask that Oli was just showing his new camera at him.
He didn’t though he would get pictures of him when he had the wolf costume on and then off.
They were kind of intimate pictures between them but that made Ry love him anyway.
His idea did just get stronger by that.
“Oli. What would you say if you post about this picture of us being with the costumes. Looking at each other in the mirror?”
“Yes but. For what, my love, exactly?” Oliver was confused.
“Don’t freak out but. I kind of want to post pictures about us. Until we’re both ready to tell at the whole world. What do you think?”
He was the one freaking out right now though.
“I would say. Yes. Yes, let’s do it.”
Oh.
Okay maybe he shouldn’t freak out at all as they sigil that promise with a kiss.
“Just, I will post them in October. Since, it will be also a spoiler for the Halloween episode.”
“Okay.” He added smiling.
“This doesn’t mean that I didn’t want to do it anyway. Because believe me, darling. I wanted to asked you the same thing but I was too scared you would say no to me.”
For God sake.
“Oli. I would never say no to you. Besides, I was afraid to ask you this as you. For the same reason.”
“Lord, we’re really are bad at the communication.” They both smiled.
“Oh i think we’re too good at that part. If you know what I mean” he blinked at him as Oliver blushed for the meaning.
“You’re right. So since we’re doing it. Which are your suggestions?”
“I think let’s start with the pictures and then see later what we’re gong to do. But before this. I need to asked you another thing.”
“Tell me.”
“What if at Thanksgiving day. You would come with me at Texas. To. You know. Eat with my parents…”
Oliver was shocked at Ry request as his eyes were wide open.
Anyway, it didn’t matter because he wanted to asked him the same thing this time too.
“To meet your parents as friends or…” he still wanted to ask because you’re never sure about anything this day.
“To meet my parents as my boyfriend. My partner. Whatever you want us to call.”
Okay, they were really doing it.
“What if I said yes and tell you that I wanted to asked you the same thing. Just for this Christmas to come with me at London?” Ry eyes were glowing.
“I would say yes to you as well.”
Oh.
Yes, this time they were on the same page.
OCTOBER 2024
As Oliver did post those pictures about him and Ryan for the Halloween episode. He couldn’t help himself and scroll his Twitter tl with his sport account about them.
He wanted to know what fans thinks about.
With his surprise, he would never guess that the pictures of them staring at the mirror was similar to another picture from Spiderman’s actor and Zendaya. Staring at the mirror with the same pose.
It’s strange sometimes how life work and how two people are destined to meet and be intertwined in each other’s life without acknowledge it.
He’s sure as hell though that Ry was a special surprise who he will never stop to love and be in piece with him.
That’s why he couldn’t stop this time to hide his feelings for him and he won’t anymore.
Chapter 19: Your dancing moves are amazing, Darling
Summary:
Oliver reaction at the Risky Business dance of Ryan
Or
Ryan tells Tim what he wants to do about Eddie feelings realization for Buck.
Notes:
Hy people,
i wanted to say I'm sorry it took me so long but i'm busy with another exam *sad crying emojiAlso, i don't why but my Ao3 page had some bug and it didn't make me register my recent Buddie fic until yesterday. I contact the emergy support and they resolved the problem now but still I'm scared if this chapter doesn't upload correctly.
Please let me know, if it does <3
Anyway, i hope you enjoy it and thank so much for the kudos and the comments. They really make me want to keep writing about this two <3<3
Stay tuned for next chapter <3<3
(P.S: I know i said I'm close to the end but I don't know. When i feel it will be the end, you will see the last chpater number on this fic. Lol)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
NOVEMBER OF 2024
It was a splendid normal day for Ryan at his home. Especially after an incredible month were his boyfriend keep on telling on interviews how attractive he is and how even without the mustache he’s just still pretty handsome.
Also, finally they didn’t have to work anymore with that ugly face and be finally going where Buck and Eddie should have been from season 4.
Anyway, it’s still true that Eddie was going in El Paso but he will come back and be with Buck. That’s sure as hell.
His thoughts were interrupted by a phone call.
Who was calling him at this hour at night?
He just hopes his kids are well asleep right now.
“Hello beautiful”
“Hy, Tim how are you?” Of course it was him.
“Really good, hotshot. Anyway, I want to discussed with you how oblivious Eddie storyline will proceeded and you know. Get my two IT boys canon.”
Sometimes Ryan doesn’t get when Tim was joking with him or it’s just a special teasing tone he use just for him.
Maybe the second.
Anyway, he can’t help it but be so excited for this.
“Of course! Then, what Eddie would do?”
“Well, since we will be on a break until next march. I just want to say, that Buck will have his feelings realization about Eddie before you. Or maybe at the same time. What you prefer?”
Sometimes Ryan feels like he’s privileged because if someone asked, Tim never ask someone else about what to do with the scripts. Just him and maybe Kenny for the Risky Business dance thing.
But he doesn’t to get advantage of this. Just give his character the right storyline.
So, yes maybe Eddie should have the same feelings realization as the same time as Buck but he also knows if Eddie does, then he will not go at El Paso to Christopher.
Because Eddie for how much he love his son. He knows the moment he feels that he’s in love with Buck, he will try to stay for him and bring his son back in another way.
What Ryan want though is what Oliver said in one interview. He wants some angst, some pining, some will they won’t they. Not all the slow burn. Because they’ve been in a slow burn for seven seasons.
Now Ryan just wants the final angst, the final push to get them be finally together. For Ryan to finally kiss his boyfriend on screen and called him his tv husband.
So, to answer Tim question.
“I think it’s better if it’s just Buck for the moment. While Eddie when he’s in El Paso.”
Of course, Tim was happy about Ryan answer. As always.
OCTOBER OF 2024
If one thing Oliver knew for be Ry’s boyfriend, it’s that his boyfriend is hot. In whatever he decides to do.
So, when Kenny propose the idea of Ryan doing the Risky Business dance he wouldn’t never imagined it see him boy being half naked, dancing around Eddie house for six takes straight, showing his underwear where Oliver was watching.
Good lord, he never was so turn on as he was right now.
He needs to fuck him at home later but first he has to play Buck.
Even though, what’s a little flirting with the way he was moving the beer in his hand while shooting the scene?
It’s not like Buck is really heartbroken because his ex dumped him anyway?
What he really want his to take that underwear off him and give him a really good blowjob until he will dirt with Ry cum that shirt.
Lucky for him, he just needs to write on their chat about his fantasies as Ry do the same with him.
That’s why he could fulfilled once they were on Oliver place.
Notes:
The call is insipired by the buddie hug still we had because i know that they know.
I'm sorry if this chapter is too short. I promise next chapter it will focus on meeting the parents. So stay tuned <3<3
Chapter 20: Maybe in another universe we will still be lovers as in this one.
Summary:
Oliver decide to celebrate their fouth month anniversary at Dinseyland.
Or
The first part of the meeting with the parents.
Notes:
Hy people,
i swear I'm not forgeting this fic. I'm sorry I'm busy with college exams and I'm really trying <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
NOVEMBER OF 2024
Celebrating their forth month anniversary at Disneyland was maybe not the best thing for Oliver as they couldn’t not be notice by some fans and got pictures with.
Anyway, it was magic and just be with his boyfriend was enough for Oliver.
It was for Ry too but the way he was holding his hand when they were sure nobody was watching them.
Or when they went to the horror roller coster and Ry was scared all the time when everything went black or he saw a ghost in the mirror of the haunting house.
Oliver was just getting in love with him more.
Maybe he can’t lie either. Some rides were scary or boring and the line were exhausting. But he would’t change a thing to be here with the love of his life.
Especially when they did all the rides and Oliver finally get the little surprise Ry organized for him in their hotel room.
Getting him a full size bed covered with red petals and champagne with a cake Ryan baked himself for Oliver with a note on top of it.
Saying: ‘For my soulmate. I love you’.
Oliver was crying from joy maybe for the first time in his life.
Jennifer was really doing great with this movie. Ryan wanted to show up for her. Even though they haven’t a scene together in the show. Thing that Ryan want to change as Jennifer too.
Anyway, he did show up with his son Mateo and his partner for life, Oli.
Getting some pictures with them.
Jennifer was happy to see them both.
“Ryan!” Jennifer said while hugging Ryan with a full smile.
“Jen!” he replied hugging her tight.
“Oh look who you brought here! Isn’t he the cutest little baby?” She said to Mateo.
“He wants to be called a man now.”
“Oh right. Because he is a little man!” she took Mateo and make him fly.
Ryan was happy to have a female friend who gets him for the kids part and she was amazing in her actress carrer and being a mother at the same time. Ryan just feels a failure as being a dad sometimes. Oli was the only one who never made him feel like a failure though.
“I hope you don’t steal all the fun here.” Speak of the devil.
“Hy little tv brother” Jennifer put Mateo down as she went to hug Oli.
“Hy my tv sister” Oli hug her, smiling.
“So, how are you feeling?” Ryan asked at Jen.
“Really good. I’m grateful to share this story after a long time and thank you so much to be here for me. It means a lot.”
“Of course, Jen. You shouldn’t even ask.” Oli add.
“Anyway, now that you’re here too. We can shoot some photos together.” she add.
Oh.
“Sure.” They both replied as they get a picture with her in the middle of them.
It was a cute little moment between his coworkers and family.
As Oli took Mateo to get in the car and go home, Jen asked Ryan to stay a minute to talk about something.
Ryan nodded and told Oli he will be with them in a moment.
“So, are you gonna telling me what’s going on between you and Oliver or I should just figure it out myself? Because you know I’m good at negotiations.” Ryan just combust in a shy smile.
“Well. To put it simple. We’re dating. From four months by now. So…”
“Wait! Are you serious?! Oh my God, I’m so happy for you guys! As much as I will be happy when Buddie is going canon.” She winked at him.
Ryan just laugh and feels a little giddy and in someways thinking being with Oli not just in their universe but also in 9-1-1 universe. It will make his heart explode for all the love he has for him.
He just wants all with him as Oli wants the same.
Especially when for Thanksgiving day he will finally meet his parents as he will fly in London for this Christmas.
So, yep.
They were doing it for real this time.
THANKSGIVING DAY (SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA)
Maybe if Ryan would actually thought about the consequences of this. This time he wouldn’t find himself yelling at the table with all his family members and in front of his kids too. Just because he brought his boyfriend at home.
Maybe he should except it though since his dad was never accepting of the LGBT community.
Or maybe he just thought for a moment that it wasn’t just his mom the one parent who really care and love him anyway.
But maybe that was just a selfish dream about another person who have his name in another universe.
That’s why as before when he was in high school, he disappoint all his loves ones by just being himself.
He’s tired to be not enough.
Notes:
I'm sorry this is not what you were expecting for what i wrote in my last note but this is just a part one for what I have in mind.
Thanking so much for the kudos. it really warm my heart <3 <3
I'm waiting for college class to restart and finally watching our Buddie canon on March <3<3
Chapter 21: I'm sorry for my shitty parents, do you still want to be mine forever though?
Summary:
Part 2 of Thanskigiving day with Ryan parents.
Notes:
Hy people,
I finished my exams finally!!
Also, I can't wait to watch Buddie canon on my screen this march!!Anyway, i hope you're enjoying this fic until now <3 <3
THIS IS ALL INVENTED I DON'T KNOW WHAT RYAN PARENTS THINKS ABOUT OLIVER OR IF HE EVER PRESENT THEM TO HIS PARENTS AT SOME POINT!!
IF YOU'RE UNCONFORTABLE READING THIS GO AWAY!
WARNING: slut shamed. Homophobic languange.
Chapter Text
THANKSGIVING DAY (SOME MINUTES AFTER THE FIGHT)
It wasn’t really Ry fault to be honest. Oliver learned that being with your parents especially in the holidays occasions is really stressful and it can broke some strong bond you created towards the years just because for an idea.
Especially a political one or a social one.
He knew that from existence of course because if the younger version of him told him he would be here with his boyfriend parents, celebrating Thanksgiving. He surely know he was joking.
Or because his parents never really cared about his dreams. Not after what he did to become an American actor. Maybe in another time line, he would keep to be a computer game salesman.
He would find a nice London girl. He would end up to marry her and have all the package.
But right now, the only thing he want to do is to go up in Ry room and making sure his boyfriends knows how much Oliver loves him. As he let Mateo and Genny playing with their tias for the moment.
Oh Lord, maybe he got it really bad for him after all.
Ryan was crying in the bathroom. As he always did when he lived here with his parents. It’s not like Ryan didn’t have an amazing childhood. He did for some part of it.
But every time he’ve been with a girl it was always like she is the one for them. Never for him.
Maybe now realizing he was fully gay, it made him understand why some girls in high school saw that in him. Not because of some toxic masculinity bullshit they said to him back then to how to be a man.
Just because they sensed it on him.
However, it doesn’t really matter right now. Gay or not, he still that little kid who didn’t know what to do with his life.
He’s still that little kid who’s afraid they would never loved him as he is.
His father just proves it some minutes ago with his partner.
God, what Oliver would think of him right now?
He must stopped to loved him after what he said…
That words was still inside his mind as a bullet.
SOME MINUTES BEFORE THE FIGHT…
“You and your British slut should go away from this house!” His fathers yelled at them
All their eyes were watching him and his partner. As they were the only one standing sitting at that table.
It should be a day to relax. A day to thanking God for what he did and to bring them all together and being alive.
Of course, it never is like that. Ryan should know from all the Christmases and the Easters spent here and with his ex wife, bringing him hell to Earth. Saying all the time ‘When you two would give me a niece?’ Or ‘When you will married her, Ryanito?’.
Now, he’s just a single dad. Working as an actor with the love of his life. Having two amazing children and maybe three with Gavin. Watching them grow and become beautiful humans being.
They didn’t have the horror to listen to their homophobic abuelo that he didn’t accept him.
Screw what his father wants for him. Screw what society wants from him.
“If that’s what you think of my boyfriend than you’re the one getting out of this house!” He yelled at him.
“Go up in your room! Now!” His father replied.
As he watched the look of terror in his mom eyes and dissapointment from Oliver. He ends up leaving their table.
Thinking as always to be a failure.
BACK IN THE PRESENT…
As he dried his tears, he stand up from bathtub and went to open the door. Just that someone else did already open it.
“Oli…”
“Ry”
They stared at each other for a moment too long as they both said then.
“I’m sorry.”
They both laugh at that.
“I thought you were in your room. When I didn’t find you I heard someone crying in the bathroom and I wanted to check out if it was you…”
“You don’t need to explain. I’m the one who left the table with you and our kids there…”
Oh.
Is this what Ry was thinking?
“Ry - he entered and closed the bathroom door as he took his boyfriend hand on his own — You did nothing wrong back there, okay?”
“What…”
“Look, it’s normal to reacting like this because of what your dad said. I get it. I just hope when you will be with me this Christmas at London my folks would be better.”
“Wait. You still want me to spend Christmas with you and your parents?”
“Of course I want you. Why wouldn’t I? I love you. This doesn’t change anything about us. Okay” he said reassured him.
Ryan smiled as the words remind both of them when Oliver said the same thing some months before everything changed for the better forever.
Maybe because it was true and it is. It’s the best thing that Oliver ever had.
And it’s the best thing that Ry ever had.
He knows it.
That’s why he lean over to giving him a chaste kiss on Ry lips.
A sigil to say everything is okay between them.
It will always be.
“So, do you want to spend this insane holiday in another place with our kids? Because I must said as a vegan person, I never saw so much meat as today.” Ryan laughed until he smirk with an idea.
“Well, maybe it’s not the first time you saw so much meat. If you know what I mean?” He blink his eyes to him.
Oli instantly got him as his cheeks became a little red form blushing.
“That’s-That’s because it’s the only meat I like to eat.”
“Oh, here I thought you like just vegetables.”
Okay maybe he has to stop because when he got this horny in a moment?
“You’re the only exception.” Oli bit his lips.
“Mmh, maybe when we he get at home. You will show me.” Oli nodded.
It was a promise they won’t both break.
Chapter 22: The end.
Notes:
Hy people,
I know how much time passed since I updated this fic. I'm so sorry, I didn't know what end give at them but now I could say I try of did. I just hope, your interest didn't fade aways or worse.Anyway, there is it ❤️
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
SOME MOTHS AFTER
They never thought they could last this long but after all they’ve been trough. Oliver could never forget how they spent all they time together. How his mom accept Ry on the family so easily.
The thing he loved the most of that Christmas trip was how they took photos of every place to see in London and their kids without been recognized.
After the holidays they hade to come back at work as soon as possible but this time Oliver never believed that Tim would break them apart for so many episodes of the show.
Sure, they were always able to work in distance and together. Especially, beefing with each other because of Christopher and Buck place in the Diaz boys’s life.
What Oliver never believed what Tim put him up with was working constantly with another man, Anirudh, which wasn’t his one.
On the other hand it didn’t matter because Tim was able to fuck it up his show for good, with killing his father figure, Peter.
They will just hope everything will be better for the show sake. Anyway, there was still Buddie canon to film. Also, there was still the interviews Oliver has to do with his lover.
He can’t wait for it any longer.
JUNE OF 2025
Oliver was ready to film his two interviews with ET and Buzzfeed thirst tweets. Contrary of Ryan where he was a little preoccupied of how much he will show his attraction for him.
It’s not like they start easy with the reading and the questions.
Sure, Oliver enjoyed so much hearing his soulmates saying stuff like how much he was hot and his eyes were mesmerizing.
Almost getting a boner.
But the last thing that was hitting him where the questions about their personal chemistry on the show and out of the show.
Like he was sweating badly when he hear Ryan saying:
“We’re the most couple uncoupled.”
He was so scare to get them caught like some hours ago, it wasn’t Ry the one been preoccupied about this.
Now, they spending all the time with Oliver trying to make Ry saying he’s the top of the relationship while Ry was trying to hint about them on the interview.
What a crazy night.
SOME HOURS BEFORE THE INTERVIEWS
Ryan was having the worst time of his life. Maybe this doesn’t count on his 3 worst moment of his life such as he keep on wondering if he still had a job back when he was filming the Texan scenes.
Anyway, it does look bad for him and his long term relationship with Oli.
Sure, maybe he was exaggerating. Maybe the situation will be smooth and sweat. However, how could he not break everything and having an existential crisis right now?
IN THE INTERVIEW
Ryan would say it’s not his fault he can’t help but laughing and getting his cheeks red all time while reading some sexual about his Oli.
It’s not his fault he can’t help but keep saying stuff like calling Oli his baby girl or saying that he knows how beautiful is.
It was just part one of the interviews of today.
The second one, Ryan could say it was the sprint of joy of before to bring him and tell all the world how he wanted to join the cast because he had a crush on Jennifer since he was a kid.
Just in his thoughts, he will admit it was a gay crush on female celebrities.
It didn’t know what posses him after to say to Oli that he was his love interest. On the show obliviously. But still, he knows Oli got him. As they always will.
So, it didn’t matter all the lilt touches he was doing on Oli leg with his hand.
It didn’t matter the long stares. Making Oli blush. Being so comfortable with each other like always.
It should scare him.
But at this point and in this time of his life. Ryan just knows he found his long term partner and best friend.
They will be fine until the end of their life together.
He’s sure of it.
MAY OF 2025
It still makes wonders how Oliver could get jealous of a fan been close to his long term partner.
Maybe it was the alcool in him but he should know that when fans wants a photo of Ry, he can’t do anything about it.
What it really makes him wonder how he got goosebumps, it was looking at Ry turning his head and all body towards him as he left his fans to listen to him.
Just because Oliver called his name without thinking about it.
When Ry was actually close to him, whispering:
“What my love?”
Oliver didn’t know what to say.
He was just trying to invite Ry with him and Aisha to drink something after the party.
He did say it at the end, as he proceed to leave him and go to another room to get himself together.
He can’t figure it out why after all this years, Ryan has this effects to him and his mood as back then in London before starting his whole career on acting.
He can’t help it even later when they posted a IG story when he was calling Ry ‘My guy’ just because he was still on alcool even though he knows he can put up with it.
He’s just a bisexual man in love. He must accept it sooner than later.
RYAN POV AT THE PARTY…
Ryan was looking at Oli a little preoccupied when he saw how he go strict to their friends when he called him. Just when he was taking some pictures with his fans.
He wonders what happened.
Just when he came back and they all went at Aisha house to an after party.
Oliver was all over him and his non existential personal space when it comes to him and Buck.
It can’t help it but smile and kissing his boyfriend all the time just because he can now.
How much his life changed back when he still in the closet until now. Sure, he still didn’t come out online as Oliver neither.
But it doesn’t matter because their love life where just their business and of no one else.
Notes:
Thank you so much for all the love and the comments 💕💕
You are what made me keep going when I wouldn't 🥹 💗

ryliver on Chapter 1 Tue 10 Dec 2024 12:48AM UTC
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rosstrytobe on Chapter 1 Tue 23 Sep 2025 09:21PM UTC
Last Edited Tue 23 Sep 2025 09:30PM UTC
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