1 - 20 of 88,702 Works in Crack Treated Seriously
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Summary
The hand that snatches up the plate and then holds the door open is wrong, too — all bony in places it’s never been before, and the nails look like they’ve just gotten longer.
Dell swallows. “I, uh…just came to check on you,” he says, trying not to fixate his eyes on Herbert’s neck, where there is definitely a sea of strange little growths that look like they want nothing more than to push themselves out of the skin. And Dell’s certain they would, given the chance.
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Merasmus places a curse on Medic for refusing to help him set up a health insurance plan.
Expectedly, everyone else has to deal with the consequences, too.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,208
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 0
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Dumbass programmer's self saving system by Azzrael
Fandoms: Twisted-Wonderland (Video Game)
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Idia Shroud made a visual novel.
It was supposed to be a hobby project: people loved it, then they hated the ending.
Now he’s been isekai’d into his own game as the villain who betrays the hero— and he’s pretty sure the “System” talking in his brother’s voice is mocking him.So he made an easy step-by-step plan:
1- Fix the story.
2- Give Malleus Draconia a happy ending.
3- Don’t die.A foolproof plan, right? Right. Except every time he speaks to Malleus, he gains affection points like he’s the Y/N of an otome.
Idia just wants to uninstall himself out of reality before he accidentally flirts his way into being magled by a dragon.
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Help! I've suddenly transmigrated into the Duke's son! by IndiraIshra
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
After Jungkook’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day that culminates in a car crash which preemptively ends his fairly normal life, he finds himself thrown into a chaotic world of fantasy, magic, court intrigue and a very out of place, very janky gaming system.
Between pop-up windows, status warnings, and learning which fork to use first when there’s a half dozen of them because he’s suddenly nobility, Jungkook fumbles like a fish out of water without truly understanding the main plot or even genre of the world he’s been unceremoniously thrust into.
It’s a romance story.
And Jungkook’s the (somewhat unwilling) main character.
(Yes. He’s been Isekai’d)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,611
- Chapters:
- 1/?
- Hits:
- 0
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Ginny Weasley and the Side Effects of All Hell Breaking Loose by QueenOfStormySkies (girlwithagreenribbon)
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Tom Riddle is back, on the run, dating the most popular boy in school, and best friends with Harry Potter, of all people.
Ginny Weasley is still trying to figure out how she feels about all of this.
Series
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Coping With Chaos (and a Weapon or Two) by cyn1calst4r
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)
19 Oct 2025
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After his Father returns from America to whisk his mother away when he leaves again, Midoriya Izuku makes the only logical decision in the moment.
Run as far in the opposite direction as possible.
But as he takes these leaps away, he quickly finds a short-term solution to maybe 3 of his about 17 existing problems whilst creating 4 more: Vigilantism.
Oh look, its even got a bonus on at the minute, you get a free new dad with it. Wait- never mind, two new dads? And, are those... friends?
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i may change the summary and title once i figure this fic out a bit more but this thing's got a mind of it's own at the minute -
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It’s been officially five weeks since Pomni attended an interview at Spudsy’s. Four weeks since she got hired. Three weeks since her first shift. After around 90 hours of part time work, she can confidently say she hates working at Spudsy’s.
Pomni normally wouldn’t choose to work at a fast food chain but Spudsy's was her last hope. Between drowning in student debt and her boyfriend wanting to move into another apartment, money was something Pomni desperately needed.
The hiring process was quick and Pomni got hired on the spot, which was a red flag that she chose to ignore. She thought the horror stories on r/Spudsy were just exaggerating—it couldn’t be that bad, right?
Wrong.
(or: the funnybunny workplace sitcom that no one asked for)
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When Sokka sees Zuko making a deal with another man in a Earth Kingdom Village, he follows fearing the worst. But when he realizes he's completely misread the situation, he tries to make it up to Zuko using his own body.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,566
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 0
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Molting Is a Normal Biological Process, Actually by the_untamed_poet25
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
19 Oct 2025
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“I did.” Childe throws the mango underhand like a basketball. Zhongli snatches it out of the air with one clawed hand, glaring. “You were glowing and tremoring and whispering about tectonic realignment. Hottest shit I’ve ever heard. Molting? Even better.”
“Please leave.”
“And let my hot immortal boyfriend molt in peace?” Childe gasps. “Absolutely not. What if your skin gets stuck and you need help peeling it? What if I miss the ceremonial shedding of the shoulder scales? What if I don’t get to keep a scale again?”
“You framed it last time.”
“Yeah! And it's in the guest bathroom like a statement piece. Everyone loves it. They think it's modern art.”
In which Zhongli molts and Childe loses his mind, again.
Series
- Part 36 of ZhongChi / ChiLi Oneshots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,620
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 1
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Gotham Reporter Uncovers Elaborate Lie, Is Promptly Gaslit by Entire Wayne Family by the_untamed_poet25
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics)
20 Oct 2025
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Summary
“Mr. Wayne,” she tried again, voice steadying. “Do you have any comment on the statistical correlation between your family’s accidents and major criminal incidents in Gotham?”
Bruce’s eyes flicked toward her—sharp, calculating, faintly amused.
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
“Oh, I think you do,” she said, before Greg could stop her. “The timing lines up exactly.” She flipped a page. “The night the Joker’s toxin was released in the East End? Tim Drake hospitalized for chemical exposure. The Riddler’s warehouse explosion? Dick Grayson, ‘parkour mishap.’ Scarecrow’s gas attack? Damian Wayne—”
“—was poisoned by a salad,” Bruce interrupted, with the calm confidence of a man who’d rehearsed that line before.
Marcia blinked. “…A salad.”
“Yes,” Bruce said, utterly deadpan. “Kale. Terrible stuff.”
Or, the Gotham Gazette runs a full feature on Wayne family injury excuses. Tim Drake “sleepwalked” into a rooftop katana fight. Jason Todd “fell into a historical reenactment.” Duke Thomas glows. The reporter loses her mind.
Series
- Part 3 of DC Oneshots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,375
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Bookmarks:
- 1
- Hits:
- 5
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Demon Hunting Takes Balls of Steel by Elliemechanical
Fandoms: 淫妖蟲 ~凌触学園退魔録~ | Inyouchuu ~Ryoujoku Gakuen Taimaroku~ (Visual Novel)
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
A struggling pub suffers a demon attack, hires an exorcist organization... and panics over the invoice. Backed into a legal corner, the owners offer to settle their debt with a dusty old pinball machine sitting in their cellar. And the team at Black Cat Demon-Hunting Agency grudgingly accepts the deal.
The promise of perpetual spare change inspires them to bring the game back up to operation to cover their lost expenses. Two months after escaping the worst night of their lives, the demon hunters dive headfirst into the world of arcade repair, connecting with a local restaurant interested in the game.
But when the girls land in the crosshairs of an undefeated Lord Nightmare - unearthing buried trauma in the process - the race to revive the coin-operated marvel evolves into a race to fund their own protection.
[Happy 20th birthday, Inyouchuu!]
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Summary
"Was it the time I made a joke about you being a furry after you had sex with Rampage the ram from the LA Rams after that call where we had to put out a fire on the field during half time?"
Buck groans and shakes his head, "No."
Chimney uses a ballpoint pen to cross that off the list.
This goes on the entire shift, until they're pulling back into the bay and hopping out of the truck. Buck rips the list out of his hand, looking it over incredulously.
"Were these seriously all in the last six months?" he complains, reading through them with a squint.
Chim shrugs, coming up next to him, a lollipop sticking out of the side of his mouth.
"There's honestly probably more, but they're all I could think of," he explains.
"None of these are the reason I'm upset," he states and walks away.
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OR Chim says something in front of the whole squad that Bobby would have never said, and Buck is pissed at his sister and her husband for airing his secrets.
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Matt has been managing his epistaxis anime—a rare disease that causes its sufferer intense nosebleeds when they experience sexual attraction—just fine until meeting his law school roommate, Foggy, unleashes something within him. Matt struggles to keep his growing feelings and their bloody aftermath in check, all while hiding the true nature of his disease from Foggy. But as the lies and jealousy start to mount, Matt learns there are some status quos that aren’t worth preserving.
[fic by inkforhumanhands, art by thelonebamf]
Podfic of Epistaxis Anime by inkforhumanhands.
Update 10/19/25: Chapter 5 is up!
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Summary
Hogwarts has a new teacher, one who never went there himself.
Unlike everyone else, he didn't grow up with all this madness. Like… a forest full of deadly creatures right next to the Quidditch pitch, stairs that vanish under your feet, freakishly huge snakes roaming the halls… what the hell?
He should've gone with the towel design gig after all.
The Chamber of Secrets – from teacher's perspective
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Summary
“Bonsoir ?” répondit la voix grave de l’homme ouvrant la porte.
Gustave se tenait debout comme s’il était hypnotisé. Plusieurs pensées lui traversaient l’esprit en même temps.
Premièrement, c’était sans doute le mec le plus sexy qu’il ait vu de toute sa vie.
Deuxièmement, ce n'était de toute évidence pas l'appartement d'Alicia.
Et troisièmement… Gustave était toujours habillé en costume de lapin playboy rose, avec des collants en résille et un décolleté bien trop plongeant.Nique sa vie.
- Language:
- Français
- Words:
- 8,215
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 3
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Wrap-Around by helpivefallenandicantgetup
Fandoms: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Anakin Falls on the battlefield, on a small dusty planet in the Mid Rim that’s largely unimportant in the grand scale of the war. His men are dying in scores around him, screaming, spilling their guts onto the pockmarked ground, and something that has been pulling tighter and tighter over the course of the war, over the course of his whole life—between one decapitated droid and the next, something snaps in his chest. He doesn't know it, but he's more than a year early.
Or: Anakin navigates the path from straight up not noticing, to denial, to buying a pair of ugly sunglasses to hide his unfortunate Darksider eye condition, to a number of Sith lords dying in uniquely creative ways. If he reaches acceptance, it just might save the galaxy.
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On Courting Rituals by SunflowerSupreme
Fandoms: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Gil-Galad wasn’t certain if it was his place to— well—
To warn Celebrían.
Not that there was danger, precisely. But there were… facts.
Specifically: that there was absolutely no way to be certain what was in Elrond’s pants at any given moment. And perhaps more importantly, that Elrond might not know either, and would react to questions on the topic with genuine confusion, as though someone had asked if his ears were still attached or if he continued to contain blood.
Kinktober Day 3: Threesome
Series
- Part 12 of Eldritch Peredhel
- Part 17 of Season of Kink & Kinktober (Tolkien)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,751
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 3
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Summary
II’s in the bathroom when he gets the text. It’s in their group chat, sent from IV to all of them. It just reads: HELP IN LIVING ROOM with no further explanation.
Or... IV calls for help, but it's not what II expected.
(Flufftober day 19: risky rescue missions) -
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Summary
Dream and Schlatt are business partners, both with a common enemy and major targets on their backs, so it made sense that the two most powerful figures on the server would meet for private meetings, to chat, to drink, to gossip, to fuck...
Or maybe Schlatt's whole death doesn't happen because XD is excited about his new nephew.
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Bad Intel by Jemsauce
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)
20 Oct 2025
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Summary
It's an old gag, and one Emi Fukukado is rather attached to. After all, the idea of a secret engagement between herself and Shouta Aizawa—two of the gayest people on the planet—is as hysterical as it is preposterous. Even Shouta finds himself playing along sometimes, despite his ever dwindling patience in the face of such relentless stupidity.
The joke becomes a lot less funny, however, when Toshinori Yagi overhears it, and mistakenly believes it's true.
And worse still, Toshinori is astonished and in a panic when he finds himself… jealous?
Of Ms. Joke??
Disasterously, Toshinori's sudden realization that he's in love with someone he can never have is happening on the eve of an important undercover mission that he, Shouta, and Ms. Joke are all about to embark on.
Shouta is absolutely baffled by Toshinori's erratic behavior, and is completely exasperated at Emi's teasing insistence that Toshinori and Shouta are in love with each other.
That's obviously impossible… right?
Will this mission survive the chaotic storm brewing behind their secret identities? Or are things about to go horribly, horribly wrong?
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the brain is the most outstanding organ. it works 24/7/365, from birth until you fall in love. by suzukiblu
Fandoms: Superman (Comics), Superboy (Comics), Reign of the Supermen (2019), Superman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), DCU
19 Oct 2025
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Summary
Lex should possibly instruct the media department to go back to at least skimming any “requests for comment” that the Daily Planet sends over before unilaterally trashing them.
Possibly.
Series
- Part 4 of love is being stupid together