These Idiots
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Steve and Tony compete over a few things they think are important (but really no one cares)
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Smiles and Split Lips by AggressiveWhenStartled
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
04 Mar 2013
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“Just because Joan thinks it’s a good idea does not mean it’s a good idea." Greg yelled, exasperated. "Use your damn head and consider things just a little bit more before you let her push you in headfirst.”
“You’re blaming me here?” Joan blurted, incredulous.
“You’re blaming Joan?” Sherlock echoed, sounding equal parts thrilled and confused.
“I’ve seen you both without the other,” Greg growled, “and Joan definitely takes the cake for self-destructive behavior.”
“I do not!”
“I was a drug addict,” Sherlock breathed, gleefully horrified. "What did you do? No, don’t tell me, let me figure it out. Urban bungee jumping without measuring your ropes?”
Joan scowled. “Now you’re just making fun of me.”
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- Part 2 of Unusual Efforts
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prompt: "we’re the newest members of an edutainment performance group that goes to schools to teach kids about drugs or smoking or whatever" AU
lawstein; safety & fire prevention is dangerous work
[ or, 'MASTERS OF DISASTER' VOL.I ]
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Originally posted on Tumblr: http://fannishminded.tumblr.com/post/19386452923/moments-of-peace-amidst-the-chaos
Warnings: Whump, disjointed time perspective, Car Accident involving a pedestrian from Pedestrian’s perspective.John heard the screech, and his eyes whipped to the side as he desperately tried to move forward, just get across, get out of the- it was too late. He was shoved, pushed, flying, he wasn’t sure of anything besides that in this second, he might die- and by something as stupid as being hit by a car. It was silent, long seconds as he bounced, he knew his arm at least had taken most of the brunt of the blow. Time sped up as he took his next breath, then he took another. His arm was splayed out, broken, left arm, always that damn side… right knee, dislocated, probably. Another breath, sound, rushing sound, wind near him, he looked over, and he screamed.
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- Part 4 of Late Night Tumblr fics
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It’s around your nineteenth birthday that you come to realize that most of your life is built on inference upon inference. So when you learn something that violates the foundation of your perception of someone - namely, your best friend - it’s a bit difficult to recalibrate your life, even with the outlet of street-racing at your disposal in the darkness of the streets. But it’s hard to adjust. Very hard. Especially when you find out in the same week not only is your best friend in a Suicide Support Group but that, oh by the way, he’s the love of your life. But let’s rewind. (street-racing au)
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An incredibly sappy date turns more sappy.
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- Part 3 of Batjokes
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I Can't Date You Both? by Nightwoofking for flavouredice
Fandoms: Persona 4, Persona Series
10 Aug 2015
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This was requested by flavouredice who wanted a fanfic about Naoto/Kanji/Souji Where Naoto and Kanji didn't realize that Souji had been trying to date them. This was my take on things. Quick note that Naoto is a very handsome transgender man.
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Most of the Trouble in Life Comes from Misunderstanding by Acantha
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
06 Jul 2016
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Written in response to a prompt at TFA Kink-meme.
FN-2187 had no idea why his superiors were paying so much attention to him but he knew it could not be a good thing.
Or the one where Kylo Ren and Hux attempt to woo a Stormtrooper and fail miserably at it.
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Communication is Key by Acantha
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
16 Jan 2016
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A companion piece to 'Most of the Trouble In Life Comes from Misunderstanding'.
This is showing the perspectives of Kylo and Hux.Or two idiots spectacularly fail at courting, but don't tell them that.
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Steve finally got up the courage to ask Bucky out on an actual date. The first one in 70 years and they are both nervous as all hell
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Great Minds by thewayofthetrashcompactor (BriarLily)
Fandoms: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
23 May 2016
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Kylo and Rey spend some time reflecting on each other.
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Lexa is angry. She’s so angry that everything Clarke does is god damn perfect, no matter what. Lexa tries three times as hard as Clarke, and she never manages to do anything half as good.
Lexa is somewhat anxious to find out her new random roommate is the same girl she’s been nursing a crush on for half a year. -
...fantastically, wildly improbable... by notjustmom, scrub456
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
06 Jun 2016
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"The idea was fantastically, wildly improbable. But like most fantastically, wildly improbable ideas it was at least as worthy of consideration as a more mundane one to which the facts had been strenuously bent to fit." -Douglas Adams (from "The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul")
Series
- Part 12 of Towel Day 2016
- Part 14 of Singular
- Part 1 of A Series of Highly Questionable Events
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Pietro and Clint have been avoiding their UST for weeks. And now they're trapped in an elevator. And everyone else is on vacation. (Tumblr prompt for anon)
Series
- Part 3 of Tumblr Prompts
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strange colour blue by nausicaa_of_phaeacia for notcaycepollard
Fandoms: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
24 Jul 2016
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Daisy and Phil after the Sokovia Accords get reviewed.
Things are complicated. -
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The one where Dex gets drunk and hits on Nursey at a kegster.
Series
- Part 11 of Nursey/Dex Ficlets
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Good mornings have pretty broad definitions. Even more so for Dante, although this one has a strong potential of becoming one of his better ones.
Series
- Part 2 of Witchy Bussiness [RETIRED]
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Q likes to tinker...
Series
- Part 3 of Retirement Bliss?
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men weren't meant to ride (with clouds between their knees) by orphan_account
Fandoms: Hamilton - Miranda
19 Nov 2017
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Aaron has spent most of his life hiding what he is. He doesn't like it, but considering the current political climate towards people with abilities like his, it's the only option available to him.
Enter Alexander Hamilton, an obnoxious, arrogant, loudmouth bother who seems intent on disturbing the fragile peace Aaron has built for himself. And that's only the beginning.
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Kiss Me Through the Phone by BreatheInBreatheOutMoveOn
Fandoms: Persona 4, persona - Fandom, Souyo - Fandom
25 Apr 2017
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It was a simple, innocent, gesture. That at some point got lost in translation between pages of fake breasts and innocent, open mouths, and now Yosuke’s hands are shaking, with both need and nervousness, as he grips the crumpled magazine with one hand, and his cell phone with the other.
The phone rings again. Loud, and shrill, jarring him out of his half hazed thoughts as he licks his lips and curses his own stupidity under his breath. He counts the seconds between each ring, hoping to bring himself down enough to successfully convince himself of what an ass he’s being and actually follow through with hanging up the phone and throwing away the mail. But somewhere within the two and three second mark, between the next series of rings, the line clicks and goes quiet, and suddenly someone is breathing quietly on the other end, and Yosuke’s heart is beating so quickly that he almost wonders if he should be calling an ambulance instead.
“What’s your name?”
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In which Yosuke gets porn in the mail and Yu works at an anonymous sex hotline.
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“Your mother – wonderful woman, by the way – thanked me.”
Eggsy continued to play with JB’s ears as he turned to look at Harry. “For what? Helping set the table?” he asked wryly.
Harry shook his head. “No, no. She said she was grateful for what I’d done for you. She seemed under the impression that I was actually responsible for your, well, who you’ve become. She seems under the impression that I’m a good, responsible ‘father figure’ for you.”
Eggsy snorted, and turned back to JB.
*
Harry's alive, shocker. Unfortunately, death wasn't the only thing stopping Harry declaring his undying love to Eggsy. There's a bit more to work through before he can do that.
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Three games that Derek and Casey played.
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Oikawa and Bokuto are now college freshmen and roommates. Iwaizumi comes to visit one weekend, and drunken conversation turns to how they all got together with their respective boyfriends in the first place.
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Talk It Out, Wash It Away. by DryCereal
Fandoms: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
06 Oct 2016
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One nearly blinds himself with an aerosol, one's just blinded by a different kind of irritation.
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Thor has loved his brother since they were children. He never thought he would get the chance to show him exactly how much.
Thor's a gay construction worker, Loki's a closeted hipster, and Odin's palace is a trailer.
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“Wow, how different. What, the guy gives a half-assed apology and now we’re going to bend over backwards to help him? We can’t trust them!"
“We’re not bending over backwards, we’re just helping,” Keith responds, taking a bite of his food, not looking at Lance. “And we’re not trusting them either.”
Lance glares at him. “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I being mean to your boyfriend?”
Keith chokes on his food, face reddening, and Shiro whacks on his back to help Keith. “What?” Keith yelps.
“Your bounty hunter boyfriend, that’s what. You were lecturing me about Nyma before we knew they were gonna steal our lions, but now you and Rolo are suddenly chummy.”
Or, in which Pidge, Hunk, and Allura have the grand idea of getting Keith and Lance together by making Lance jealous
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(A tale of Not Unrequited Love)
Steve: I love you.
Bucky: oh no.
(and other fallacies)Bucky learns to never say never when it comes to the effect his best friend can have.
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the world you keep erasing by Slumber
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
04 Oct 2017
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Katsuki doesn't remember a world without color.
He fucking hates it.
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Thrust Issues by Sineala for phoenixmetaphor
Fandoms: Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, Avengers (Comics)
05 Jun 2018
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A battle gone wrong leads Tony to the unexpected and pleasant discovery that Steve is much more well-endowed than he could ever have imagined. But when Tony learns that Steve has never actually been able to sleep with anyone because of his size, Tony does what any good friend would do: he offers to relieve Steve of his virginity. Personally. Tony's determined, Tony's methodical, and Tony has a plan. He's going to get Steve laid. Tony just needs to make sure Steve never finds out that Tony's in love with him.
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Just A Little Advice by KuriKuri
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
10 Sep 2016
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u like that song? i’m p sure i’m going to tear my hair out if i have to hear it 1 more time.
Hizashi frowns at the text for a moment, before his phone buzzes with another message.also i think u have the wrong #.
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Kiyoko compliments Hinata's body. It turns into a chaotic mess where the team (aka Tanaka and Nishinoya) tries everything in their power to get a glimpse of Hinata shirtless.
Hinata is oblivious and Kageyama is stressed out.
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“Shou-chan, I feel like this is a bad idea,” Izumi said, sitting with Shouyou at the hairdresser. He was currently waiting to get the dye rinsed out of his hair. “What colors did you pick, again?”
“Hot pink and neon green,” Shouyou replied, not looking up from the magazine he was reading. He was taking a quiz to find out what kind of dog he would be. Shouyou tossed the magazine down angrily when it told him he was a Pomeranian. Shouyou hated how small and cutesy everyone made him out to be. He was fifteen, for goodness sake.
Izumi frowned. “Yeah, I’m sorry, but that sounds insane.”
“No, it’s perfect,” Shouyou replied. “Because even if my soul mate can pull off orange streaks, there’s no way he can get away with this.”
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“So, let me see if I understood this correctly,” Hajime says, slow and careful like he’s still waiting for some kind of punchline. “You want me to help Oikawa Tooru, a guy I barely know, because your boyfriend owes him a favor?”
“And you owe me a favor,” Hanamaki adds helpfully.
“That doesn’t even make any sense!”
“Sure it does.” Hanamaki’s smile widens. “Issei and I are practically the same person by now, anyway, so whatever favor you owe me, you also owe him. And by repaying me, you are repaying him, and in turn he is repaying Oikawa. Think of it as, like, the transitive property of equality. A equals B equals C. A equals C.”
“I know what the transitive property of equality is,” Hajime snaps.
[in which iwaizumi pretends to be oikawa's boyfriend.]
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And the world's alright with me by so_shhy
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
23 Aug 2020
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Wei Ying has been feeling like a grey, wrung-out, mildewed dishrag for a week when Lan Zhan slopes in from a trip to the store looking blank-faced and awkward and sets a pregnancy test down on the kitchen counter.
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as amber of ember glows by occultings (microcomets)
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
01 Sep 2020
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“So you’re really telling me.” Wei Ying, flushed red and bunched up with his knees to his chest, is staring. Sort of abjectly, sort of disbelievingly. “This is a sex curse?”
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And oh, my god... by clandestine7
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
08 Sep 2020
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Wei Wuxian prides himself on being pretty aware of things, pretty good at reading people, rather intuitive, if you will. So when, his third year of college, he ends up roommates with one stoic Lan Wangji, he's determined to break through the man's monosyllabic responses and become his friend. And if they fuck once in a while, hell, that makes it a pretty sweet deal any way he looks at it.
Or, in which Wei Wuxian misreads all the signals and thinks Lan Wangji just wants to be fuck buddies so he nurses what he thinks is a one-sided crush, all while Wen Ning supports them from the sidelines and Jiang Cheng suffers.
Russian translation here by mrtvn!
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“Let’s just start!” Hinata shouted loudly, blocking the snickering. He glared at the phone screen in his hands. “First question! Where and when did you first meet?”
“The toilet,” came Kageyama’s deadpan response, completely serious and somewhat resigned.
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Sequel to 'No Retakes!', in which Kagehina does the Boyfriend Q&A tag to answer everyone's questions about their relationship ... and proceeds to argue on every single one of them.
Series
- Part 2 of On Quarantining together...
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Todoroki doesn't know what exactly he's done wrong in his life to somehow accidentally start dating Bakugou Katsuki, but he has. Yup, has he ever.
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Eat, Pray, Night Hunt by Itszero
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
23 Jan 2021
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Two years into his marriage in name only with the Prince of Yi, Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji leaves his husband and runs away (at least for the foreseeable future).
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Lan Wangji goes on an adventure and Wei Wuxian learns to appreciate his husband.UPDATED WITH EPILOGUE
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“So, let me see if I understood this correctly,” Hajime says, slow and careful like he’s still waiting for some kind of punchline. “You want me to help Oikawa Tooru, a guy I barely know, because your boyfriend owes him a favor?”
“And you owe me a favor,” Hanamaki adds helpfully.
“That doesn’t even make any sense!”
“Sure it does.” Hanamaki’s smile widens. “Issei and I are practically the same person by now, anyway, so whatever favor you owe me, you also owe him. And by repaying me, you are repaying him, and in turn he is repaying Oikawa. Think of it as, like, the transitive property of equality. A equals B equals C. A equals C.”
“I know what the transitive property of equality is,” Hajime snaps.
[in which iwaizumi pretends to be oikawa's boyfriend.]