Chapter Text
Jenny was the height of pragmatism as she taught four minors how to change a nappy, even though Niko had actually been the person who had changed the first one. The baby watched Jenny as she demonstrated the steps and allowed the others to be privy to the process. Once complete, Jenny left the teens and baby alone, heading back down the stairs to her rebuilt butcher shoppe.
“That’s easy,” said Charles, possibly overestimating the simplicity of the nappy change task. He picked up the baby as soon as he was changed. “Right, which romper will it be then, Eddy?” Charles started rifling through a small stack of colourful one-piece outfits.
“At least call him properly,” Edwin said, cringing a bit. “It’s Edwin, never Eddy.”
Charles selected a green romper that had a picture of a rainbow on the front. “Have you considered he might feel a bit differently about it than you do?”
“He’s a day old, I don’t suppose he’ll have much of an opinion,” Edwin responded.
“Yeah but…he’s not gonna be…you exactly, right? Not how it works. I mean, he’s got your DNA but he’s got different parents than you did, doesn’t he?" Charles elegantly explained.
Edwin hadn’t considered that yet. To be fair, he was just wrapping his mind around the fact that he had somehow become a father in the last twenty-four hours. With Charles? He had just used the word ‘parents’ after all, presumably to describe the two of them. He glanced at Charles again, who now had a sleepy clothed baby up against his shoulder, his own eyes closed as he gave him the softest squeeze. Indeed, with Charles.
“Maybe he could be Edwin Jr,” Niko suggested, as Charles laid the baby down for a nap on the sofa. They really needed to invest in a cot and some proper clothes.
“I’m already Edwin Payne III,” Edwin said. “It wouldn’t make much sense.”
“Maybe he’d like to have his own name?” Crystal suggested.
Edwin had to admit that it made sense. Not only for the sake of practicality but because this baby was not Edwin Payne. Not exactly. And from the first minute he was alive, he was having different experiences to the real Edwin Payne. He deserved his own identity.
“Fine,” he agreed. “Charles, what would you like to call him?”
Charles looked a little shocked. “I can’t name him all by myself, can I? He’s our baby.”
Edwin gasped out loud before he could stop himself. It caught him completely off guard. The girls and Charles all stared at him. There was that nagging impulse to escape through the wall again. It was one thing to entertain the fantasy of he and Charles being parents together in his own head. It was quite another to hear Charles confirming it. Edwin fisted and unfisted his hands, trying to collect himself.
“What exactly does that mean?” he asked, trying and failing to keep the quiver out of his voice. “’Our’ baby?”
Charles scratched the back of his neck. “I mean…all of us are taking care of him, yeah? We should all decide what to name him.”
Edwin should have been relieved. He should have been grateful that Charles was referring to all of them, not insinuating that he and Edwin were the only responsible parties for a human life. But instead it felt like Charles had slapped him in the face. That it was a ridiculous notion that he and Charles should be fathers together. To be fair, Charles was likely innocent in all this. It was only Edwin constantly colouring these situations with his unhelpful feelings.
“Right, of course,” he said, voice no longer shaking. A wall of iron slotted into place around his pitiful heart.
“Can we call him Misaki?” Niko said with a bouncing excitement. “He’s my favourite from one of my manga.”
“Maybe we should hang on until we get to know him, yeah?” Charles suggested. “I’m sure he’ll start to feel like whoever he is. Eventually. Meantime, I’m gonna call him Eddy.”
Edwin took an opportunity to disappear, bringing a notebook and seeking out Jenny, since she seemed to have the most knowledge on infants. He quizzed her on many topics related to the baby’s care, writing down notes and letting her consult her phone to find answers she didn’t already have. He wrote down feeding schedules, sleep needs, cleaning and dressing and plenty of other eventualities to prepare for. At the end, Edwin felt a little less like he was underwater and more like he had a plan. Plans and order would help.
--
The girls had all gone to sleep, leaving Edwin alone with Charles and the baby. Edwin could tell that Charles was trying not to hover but he kept glancing over to see what the baby was doing.
“He sure does sleep a lot,” Charles commented.
“Yes, well, newborns are meant to sleep up to 18 hours a day,” Edwin said, proud of himself for being the new expert on the situation.
“I’m gonna teach him mad football skills,” Charles added with a grin, the ball in question being rolled side to side between his feet.
Edwin hummed noncommittaly.
Charles looked over at him. “Right. What’s the matter?”
Edwin frowned. “Nothing. This is just taking some getting used to. I hardly think it’s noteworthy that there is a lot is on my mind.”
“You think too much,” Charles scolded him lightly, coming over and gently placing a hand on his shoulder. Edwin found himself closing his eyes at the soft touch. Even through three layers of clothing, it felt heavenly.
“Edwin?”
He startled and opened his eyes. Charles was looking at him like he’d grown a second head. “Yes, Charles? What is it?”
“Nothing, you just…” He trailed off. “Nothing.” Charles went back over to look at the bookshelves awkwardly, taking his gentle hands with him.
Edwin sighed to himself. He knew he was likely at fault for the tension between them. Confessing his love had been what had needed to be done at the time. Otherwise, he’d have likely imploded like a dying star from the immense pressure of his own feelings. He’d wanted Charles to know. That didn’t mean that things weren’t awkward now though.
Edwin crossed the room to stand beside Charles. His hands hovered around his back and shoulder, not knowing where to land. Ever since his confession of love on the staircase out of hell, Edwin had lost all sense of how to touch Charles without it coming across as a romantic touch. He finally settled on placing a hand carefully on Charles’ arm, hoping it served as platonic but friendly.
“I haven’t had a moment yet but…I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for doing this with me,” Edwin said.
Charles looked surprised. “Mate, I came and got your arse out of hell. Did you really think there was any situation you’d get into that I wouldn’t be here?”
Edwin swallowed an emotional block in his throat. “I…”
“Besides, he’s a cute little mate, inn’he?”
Edwin glanced over at the sleeping baby impassively. No opinion on that. “Well you likely didn’t see your afterlife going in this direction. Being a..." Edwin didn't know how to skirt this situation well enough so he reserved nothing. “…father.”
Charles turned to face him and stroked his shoulder, smiling. “There was a 50/50 shot I was gonna end up a teenage daddy anyway, wasn’t I?”
Edwin looked at him flatly. “Charles, you went to an all-boys school.”
Charles waggled his eyebrows. “Yeah, why do you think they sent me there?”
Edwin smiled as much as he could and then walked away to the desk to do some note taking on the baby’s sleep pattern. The conversation was just an uncomfortable reminder of Charles liking girls. Not boys.
Certainly not Edwin.
--
“We absolutely cannot have him sleeping in a cupboard,” Edwin said for what felt like the tenth time.
“It’s the only piece of furniture in the backpack, mate,” Charles said but continued searching regardless. It had taken the two of them plus Crystal to wrestle the large brown cupboard out of the bag once Charles had a hand on it. Once it was out in the open area of the office, Edwin could see chipped paint and other imperfections he didn’t care for.
It was a few weeks Into having the baby that it seemed appropriate to stop having him sleep on their couch. Charles was constantly worrying he’d be sat on or would somehow manage to roll over the pillows and onto the floor. Jenny had called these concerns “new mother worries” and dismissed them but Edwin had to agree that it would be better for all if the baby was sleeping elsewhere than the sofa. Edwin had approached Crystal and Niko about purchasing a cot for the baby but they confessed that they’d spent all their money on the shopping trip they’d taken earlier to buy all the baby’s clothing and necessities. They’d need to take a new case and ask for money in exchange before they could get the baby a proper cot.
Charles seemingly gave up looking through the backpack and returned to the cupboard. “Look. It’s got this lid thing that lifts up and you can lock it in place.” He demonstrated opening up the top of the cupboard, revealing storage space inside. “He won’t be able to fall out of there and we can put some soft things in there for him to sleep on. I think it’ll work.”
Crystal bounced the baby, determined to stay out of this argument.
“I shudder to think of your childhood when you suggest things like this, Charles,” Edwin said, perhaps a bit mean. The idea of putting his child in a piece of furniture not designed for a baby’s sleep was detestable and raking on his nerves.
“Oh I was a latchkey kid, I slept anywhere,” Charles said, not sounding the least bit offended.
“Well, Henry is not a ‘latchkey kid’,” Edwin responded. “He needs a proper bed.”
Charles looked puzzled. “Sorry…who?”
Edwin froze. He didn’t realise he’d said the name out loud. His grandfather on his mother’s side had been called Henry and was probably the closest person Edwin had growing up. He’d given Edwin his first comic book for his birthday at age 9 and then each year after that up until Edwin’s death. Apart from naming the baby after Charles (a repulsively romantic sentiment that would just make things worse), this seemed the best fit. He grimaced, feeling silly. “Sorry…it’s just…well doesn’t it seem to fit him?" He looked over at the baby that Crystal was holding as she stroked his little back in a grey romper with little bats and pumpkins on it. The baby was much more alert and baby-like now that they were beyond the first week of his life, much to Edwin’s silent relief.
Charles smiled, looking very pleased, a little sparkle of tears in one eye. The sparkle showed Charles understood why Edwin wanted to choose that name. They’d shared talks of Edwin’s kind grandfather before. “I think it’s perfect. Okay, Henry, come here.” Charles always wanted to hold the baby as much as he could but he had been trying to share with the girls of late. He held the little one close and kissed the top of his head. “Henry.”
“For what it’s worth,” Crystal added, “Niko and I will go thrifting to see if we can find a good crib. No promises but maybe we’ll find something.” She left to go across the hall to Niko.
Edwin nodded his thanks just as the baby started to make a little fussy noise. It was about time for a bottle. Edwin prepared the formula at the sink and used a warming spell to heat it up, testing the liquid properly with a chemical thermometer before giving it to Charles.
“Now that he’s been christened, we should really get him registered. He’ll want to go to school in future and he’ll need records for that.”
“Right so, Henry Payne? What about a middle name?” Charles asked, doing an impressive job of feeding the hungry baby while walking around the room.
“Henry….Rowland-Payne,” Edwin said quietly, practically a whisper.
Charles stopped walking but kept his gaze on Henry. Edwin twisted his fingers together, wringing out his hands. This was another of those ‘have I gone too far’ moments.
The silence stretched on for way too long before finally Charles broke it by saying, “That’d be rad.”
From context, Edwin took this to be a good thing.
A sudden scream from the apartment across the hall startled Edward. He and Charles exchanged glances before Charles used one slick movement to hand the baby over to Edwin for safekeeping and marched over to the door. He didn't have the chance to walk straight through the wall because Niko swung open the door with a frighteningly bright grin on her face.
“Henry is such a cute, cute name!” she said, flinging her arms around Charles briefly. Niko crossed the room to Edwin and kissed the baby on the cheek. "Hi Henry, I'm your Auntie Niko!” She took the baby from Edwin and twirled around the room with him like he was a tiny dancing partner.
“Henry Rowland-Payne,” Charles said proudly and Niko looked even more excited by this, smiling at Edwin knowingly.
Edwin gave a weak smile back. At least one version of Edwin Payne was getting to take Charles’ surname.
--
Niko and Crystal managed to find an old bassinet on their thrift outing and started to clean and disinfect it as soon as they dragged it up the stairs. Edwin started to review his notes on sleep safety, a topic he'd been unfamiliar with when Jenny told him of it.
Charles was using the cabinet as a changing table, a happy solution for everyone, getting the baby out of his soiled nappy. “Good job ghosts can’t smell, hey?” Charles said to Henry, discarding the old nappy. Henry had taken to laying his head on Charles’ shoulder while he was being held and carried around, watching things going on behind Charles. He had also started making soft, pleased noises when Charles held him as well as at seeing his bottle. “You know what?” Charles said, still talking to the baby. “We’re gonna go straight for a bath, aren’t we?”
The bathtub they were using for Henry was actually a small storage tub that Jenny had gifted them with after assuring them it had never touched any animal parts or blood. Charles carried the unclothed baby over to the sink and started filling the small tub up with lukewarm water as Edwin had instructed him many times. With care but with more confidence than the first few baths, Charles lowered Henry into the tub and began washing him. Edwin felt a sense of disappointment watching Charles take care of the baby with such ease. Charles had just as little experience with babies as Edwin did, yet he took to it extraordinarily well. Edwin was still struggling to make a connection with Henry as strong as the one Charles and Henry had. The baby seemed amenable enough to anyone that wanted to comfort or feed him but whenever Edwin picked him up, he felt worry and panic start to slow down his brain. He felt incapable of helping the baby feel better when he was upset or to feed him adequately when he was hungry. Besides, if the baby preferred Charles, wasn’t it better for Charles to do most of those things? Edwin had had a nursemaid as a young child who would have done all the tasks for him while his mother slept or embroidered or played bridge with her friends. His relationship with his mother had been decently fine but he remembered when he was small preferring his nanny to be the one to put him to bed or take care of him if he got a scrape.
Edwin was shaken from his thoughts by Charles’ surprised tone saying, “Hey, you can’t go to sleep in the bath, can you? Cmon, just a bit more and we’ll get you into your new bed.” Charles finished up with washing and got Henry out to dry him with a towel. Again, he did all this with such ease, holding the baby and grabbing what he needed and tending to the baby without requiring any assistance. He clothed the baby in a little fuzzy brown onesie outfit that had two small bear-like ears on the attached hood. Charles held up his finished product, smiling. “That’s our little teddy-Eddy, innit?” Charles was still affectionately calling Henry ‘Eddy’ as a pet name.
The girls had finished cleaning the basinet and had placed a small mattress inside it. Charles brought the baby over to inspect everything. “What about a pillow?” he asked.
“No pillows, no blankets and no stuffies,” Edwin said. “Nothing in the bassinet except the mattress and baby. He could suffocate otherwise.”
Charles looked a little wary at the sound of that statement but placed the baby into the bassinet. Henry was already asleep before he was lying down. Edwin went back to his writing as the girls headed off to get something to eat.
Charles stayed sitting next to the bassinet, pulling it up close to the sofa so he could see Henry.
This really was all over-the-top, in Edwin’s opinion. “You know, he will still be in there even if left alone for more than a minute,” he said, hating how bitter he sounded.
Charles looked away from the baby. “Any issue I should know about?” he carefully asked.
Edwin put down his writing pen. “You don’t have to stare at him and hold him and be with him all the time. He’s not ill or fragile. He’ll be fine without constant coddling.”
“What would you like me to be doing?”
“Perhaps your job? Which, if you’ve forgotten is working on cases with me.”
Charles shook his head and let out a good-natured laugh. “This is so typical.”
“What is?” Edwin asked. He detested feeling like there was a joke going on at his expense.
“You. Only you could manage to be jealous of yourself.”
“I am not jealous! And it’s not myself. It’s Henry.”
Charles was crossing the room to stand over the desk next to Edwin, canting his hip into the side to perch there. He leaned in close to Edwin’s face and it felt like Edwin had lost his breath, even though he hadn’t needed to breathe for more than a hundred years.
Charles put a hand overtop Edwin’s. “If you wanted attention from me, you only needed to ask, yeah?”
Edwin’s brain wasn’t functioning. He couldn’t make his mouth create any words. He couldn’t get his face to do anything at all other than stare up into Charles’ pretty eyes.
“Now,” said Charles, “what would you like to do with me?”
As much as it shouldn’t have, that question freed Edwin from his frozen state. Charles couldn’t mean it like that. Not a chance. Edwin knew that. He needed to act casual or he'd just be the pathetic mess sitting there weeping over the gorgeous boy who didn’t love him back.
Edwin cleared his throat. “Shall we play Cleudo?”
Charles looked surprised and pulled back. He was likely expecting Edwin to suggest that they comb through their case files to work on something. Well, Edwin also had a fun side and fun was one way to get Charles to enjoy time with him.
“Cleudo it is,” Charles said finally.
--
There were a lot of discussions the next morning as the group decided on the best way to get Henry registered. A lot of back and forth went on initially in the realm of getting him registered in the states versus once they returned to London. Edwin refused to send Henry to any educational program outside of England but they were likely staying within Port Townsend for at least a couple of years while Henry grew. That debate was finally settled when it was decided they would get him registered in the states to begin and then apply for dual citizenship when they left. It was a likely scenario that they’d want to be able to take him back and forth for visits and any cases that would bring them to the states for extended periods.
Next the debate centered on who would be taking Henry to the court offices to apply for his registration. They didn’t have any hospital documentation so would have to claim a home birth. Charles was of the opinion that he and Edwin should go in disguises and do the process themselves. However, this did leave a few loose ends. They didn’t have official documentation to back up their disguise personas and even if they fabricated some documents, they would tie Henry to false identities. Falsifying documents would also take time and the longer they waited, the more suspicious is was that Henry had yet to be registered.
Reluctantly, Charles agreed that Niko, Crystal and Jenny should take him under the claim that Crystal was his mother. The father would be unlisted. Charles got the baby dressed in warm clothes, giving him lots of cuddles as he did. With apparent difficulty, he handed Henry over to Niko asking her to please be careful and to keep him warm and oh, take a couple of bottles and nappies and if he needed a change of clothes they could take that as well and don’t forget he needs to know he’s coming back to us so just reassure him and…
Niko turned the baby to face Charles. “I’ll be back soon, Daddy,” she said, speaking for him “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. Auntie Niko will take care of me. I love you!”
Charles’ chin drew in slightly as he seemed to attempt to keep himself unaffected by this. “Alright, luv. I love you too.” He kissed the baby on the forehead and watched them leave, visibly holding himself back from following.
“Bye other Daddy!” Niko called to Edwin just as she was closing the door.
Edwin came over to him. “It’s alright, Charles. They would never let anything happen to him,” he assured, placing a hand on his elbow and guiding him back toward the desk.
“He’s so tiny, Edwin,” Charles said.
“I know,” he said. Edwin felt eerily lost without Henry’s presence in their office. It surprised him, as he’d still yet to manage a strong enough bond with the baby. But there it was all the same—he was longing for him to come back. “That’s why they’ve left us Niko’s cellular telephone. Hmm? In case we wanted to video time and see Henry.”
Charles smiled through unshed tears. “You mean FaceTime?”
Edwin rolled his eyes playfully. “Don’t act as if you know anything more about it than I do.”
Charles sighed and seemed to relax just a bit. “What should we do now?” he wondered, glancing around at the empty room.
“Well, there have been some things I’ve been meaning to talk to you about,” Edwin said. Actually, this conversation should have occurred the night they decided to keep Henry after visiting Tragic Mick. But everything had been a complete whirlwind since then and Edwin had struggled to find a long enough break in it to have a serious discussion.
Charles nodded, sitting on the edge of the desk. He looked like a bronze statue with the sunlight streaming through the window hitting him at all the right angles. “Okay. Shoot.”
“There are obviously a lot of considerations when it comes to Henry,” Edwin began, delicately. When Charles nodded him on, he continued. “He won’t be able to have a normal life. His…two of his parents are ghosts. He doesn’t really have a mother, despite what’s being recorded. And we’re all quite young to be looking after him, apart from Jenny.” Edwin paused, trying to read from Charles’ expression if he had thought some of these things through before. Charles was keeping careful control over himself, however, likely waiting to hear what Edwin was winding up to. “And he’ll have questions. There will be secrets about us that he won’t be able to tell anyone. And, most practical of all, he’ll age while we won’t. He’ll eventually reach and then exceed the age when we died. He’ll continue aging and we’ll have to watch. We’ll even have to watch him…die, Charles.” Charles set his face into an even harder blank slate at that one. “I’m not saying I don’t want to do this or that I regret it. Not at all. I’m only saying that his life won’t be the most straightforward. And that no matter what, we shall one day lose him.” Edwin couldn’t help but try to imagine what it would be like to see Henry surpass his age and grow into the young adult that Edwin could have been. To take perhaps a path that Edwin would have taken if he had had that chance.
Charles sat there for a long time, just staring out of the window. The sounds of children playing outside filled the silence. Edwin himself had never played so freely as to make sounds that merry but perhaps Charles had. Perhaps his father hadn't hurt him his entire life. Perhaps there had been a bubble of young childhood with a mother who doted on him the way that he deserved before Charles became a rebellious teenager targeted by his father. Edwin liked to think there had been some happiness there even if his own happiness had only ever been Inside books.
Charles finally hopped down from the desk and offered his hand to Edwin, who took it, his heart feeling tight and uncertain.
“Edwin Payne,” Charles began, those enormous caramel eyes like a mirror Edwin could walk through. “You and Henry are the most important two people in my life. I love you both and I’ll be the one protecting you when you get into trouble. Henry’s learning from me so he’s bound to get into some scrapes, yeah?” Edwin laughed softly imagining Henry being a little mischievous. “But no matter what—if the three of us are ever separated by Death or by any other mother fucker, I’ll spend the rest of my eternity getting you back. I’ve done it before, haven’t I. Nothing but a thing.”
Charles really had to stop talking like that. Everytime he so eloquently put into words his love and profound loyalty, it made Edwin’s afterlife with him flash before his eyes. And it was like his 16 years alive and 70 years in hell were just a bad dream. Because all that mattered was the time he got to be with Charles Rowland. It was a bit of a panicked feeling when he thought about how close he’d been to not stumbling across Charles in the attic that night. How close they’d been to not having Henry. How Edwin could have easily ended up with neither of them, just wandering the earth not knowing how incredible his being was with Charles in it. There was something so comforting in the other’s presence, in being able to relax a part of himself and trust.
Edwin let out the breath he’d been holding in. “Alright. Good.”
“Feel better?”
Edwin nodded. “I do.”
--
A few hours passed as he and Charles worked through a bit of clerical work they’d been putting off. Edwin penned out the reports while Charles walked around, bouncing his football on the tops of his feet and knees and dictated the details he remembered about the cases as they worked.
Niko and Crystal returned with the baby triumphantly with an official-looking paper in hand complete with seals and signatures. Niko handed this to Edwin while Charles and Crystal went to see about putting the baby down for a nap.
“They said his social security card will be coming by mail in a few weeks,” Niko explained.
Edwin thanked her and then beamed proudly down at the certificate. His eyes narrowed as something caught him by surprise. “What is this?” he asked Niko, who suddenly seemed to be feigning innocence poorly.
“What is…what?”
Edwin read the name out loud. “Henry…Misaki Rowland-Payne? Really, Niko?”
Niko turned a bit red. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “We can get it changed. You just have to fill out an amendment packet and pay sixteen dollars…”
“I’m teasing you,” Edwin said with a genuine smile. “It’s perfect."